let's talk about severus snape. he's one of the most controversial characters the internet has to offer, with several blogs, channels and pages dedicated specifically to hating him, despite him having one of the most—if not the most—intriguing character arcs the series has to offer. so, as a result of me coming across far too many of said blogs, channels or pages, here's an extremely detailed explanation of why i like him and think he's easily one of my favourite characters :)

1. he's not that bad of a teacher.

just so you know, i'm a teenage girl fresh out of high school. so, my experience with teachers? still keeps me up at night :)

my family is pretty strict about religion. you can guess what that means. anything that was magic-adjacent, especially something that, god forbid, had an entire school dedicated to witchcraft and wizardry was a hard no if i wanted to have any sort of freedom over the media i paid attention to, and any opportunity to go about my life without being monitored to make sure i wasn't suddenly possessed or something. thanks to this, i ended up secretly reading the philosopher's stone in my last year of primary school. i would've been 11 at the time, just about to turn 12, so a little bit older than harry and co. going on what i'd heard from those who had already read the series, i went in expecting to absolutely despise this man. i went in expecting to read a demon. i finished the book and came out thinking... that really wasn't that bad.

my mom found out, so i didn't get to read the rest of the series until i ended up on the executive committee for my school's book club and my friends were appalled that i'd only read the first book. at this point, i'm still expecting him to get worse and... he just doesn't. when i was in primary school, i had multiple teachers break wooden meter-long rulers across my classmates' backs. the first time it happened, i was in infant year 2 (about 6/7 years old). i had teachers who would insult us, based on anything from hygiene to behaviour to intelligence if you looked at them wrong. my sister (who was three years ahead of me) had a teacher who kept her in hours after school was over because the teacher had a written a note in her workbook upside down, and when my sister corrected her, the teacher made her rewrite it, turning the book each time the note was written so it would never be done the correct way.

in secondary school, i had teachers who would actively humiliate us in front of the class if we didn't do as well as they wanted. i had teachers who would throw markers and whiteboard erasers at us if we did something they didn't like during class. i had a teacher who looked for a friend of mine who was petrified of attention and then mercilessly picked on her until she went to the bathrooms to cry. these are the kinds of teachers that i was used to. so, when i read harry potter and read snape, who would have probably been one of the nicer teachers i met in my lifetime, i thought to myself, he's really not that bad. he's just... strict.

antis claim that he traumatised every kid that ever went through his class, that he straight up abused them and... no. he didn't. all of them are comfortable talking back, they talk during his class, no one trembles when he walks past, except for neville, who usually bore the brunt of snape's anger because he was consistently messing up in a potentially lethal class.

after school, i hated the thought of formal education, so now i'm working until i feel ready to do university. coincidentally, one of my jobs is teaching maths and english to kids writing the end of primary and secondary school exams. given the sheer amount of annoyance i feel sometimes, i actually respect him for not being more harsh with them, especially when they're all running off into danger or exploding cauldrons.

he really isn't that bad of a teacher, and we know this, since his classes' owl results are said to be consistently good.

plus, he was written in the 90's when all this was okay behaviour for teachers. hell, compared to some of the teachers in text, given that he goes out of his way to make sure the students are always protected, he's a lot better than most people give him credit for.

2. i relate to him.

come on, the man grew up to be a dramatic, queer-coded, petty bitch who wears all black all the time and likely has at least one mental disorder. i'm a petty, emo bisexual with (actually diagnosed, don't worry) depression and anxiety and I'm in a theatre group. what did you really expect from me?

on a serious note, both of the schools i went to were considered "prestigious". i got into my primary school because of a teacher's recommendation (she was a family friend). the second school i got into was because i scored ridiculously high on the placement test that would determine which school i went to. in primary school, i was the poor, really awkward, really smart kid who got left out of everything, and my best friend was the only kid who was worse off than me.

in secondary school, i was just as smart as everyone else... but i was still poorer, and still more awkward and still got left out of everything.

i got that isolated feeling, that feeling of not being good enough, that feeling where life always seems to have it out for you and that's even though i still got dealt a better hand than snape ever did. so, i get it. i'm never ever going to have it as bad as he did, but i acknowledge what he went through and i sympathise, because i have a chance, but it only ever got worse for him.

3. i genuinely enjoy his character.

this dude went through absolute hell for basically his entire life. the best years he had were probably when he was neck-deep in the group of people who hated witches and wizards like him, but somehow managed to treat him better than the good guys.

all of that, and he still manages to be one of the most entertaining motherfuckers in the whole series, with one of the most interesting character arcs ever. it's the witty lines, the sheer dynamic of his character, the change from the twitchy, hypervigilant kid from the slums to the adult that managed to spy on the Dark Lord himself and save the wizarding world in the process, while still being a hot mess of a person. it's the managing to get shit done while everybody hated him and everything was going to hell. it's the everything, and i haven't even talked about how badass he is.

come on, potions prodigy turned master, exemplary duellist (cough, cough, winning 4-on-1 vs McGonagall, Flitwick, Sprout and Slughorn, and leaving a scratch on nobody, while managing to not take a single hit himself, cough, cough), spellcrafter, spy and one of the only wizards to ever figure out unaided flight. dark arts master, proficient at healing (dumbledore would've been dead a lot sooner, if it weren't for him, most likely). he's one of the most powerful wizards of his time. i've said that any universe where he's actually a bad guy—or just legitimately loyal to the death eaters—is a universe where voldemort wins and this is why. if he was motivated by literally anything other than lily, the wizarding world was more than likely fucked.

the point is, i just think he's neat.

4. spite.

every time i appreciate snape, a snater feels like someone is walking over their grave. every time i appreciate snape, a snater turns blue out of sheer rage. every time i appreciate snape, a snater loses their mind looking for their non-existent reading comprehension.

the spite in my veins is tempered only by the broth of instant ramen and ungodly amounts of sugar, and i'm going to use them all in my mission to cause antis pain when they refuse to acknowledge their lack of critical thinking and analysis skills.

so, yeah. why do i actually like snape?

tl;dr: he's not that bad. for a teacher written in the 90's and compared to teachers i've had within the decade, the guy's just strict. sure, he's a dick (who i personally think is hilarious), but he always makes sure the students are safe and he didn't leave any lasting effect on any of the students. he's really not that bad of a teacher. and hell, he's not even that bad of a person. i fully admit that he was an asshole and i entirely believe he was prone to self-destructive behaviour, but he still tried to atone for his mistakes and he did, is the thing, even though the odds were stacked more or less completely against him. i like him because he entertains me, and because i relate to him, as a teen who went through some shit and probably would have joined up with some bad people if it weren't for my friends and family, and as a teacher who really can't stand my students sometimes. i also like him because it irritates people who don't like him :)

also, istg if any of you respond to this with "bUt hE was ObseSsED with LiLY and just WAnTEd to FUCK hEr," i'm crawling into your bedroom window with the most unrealistic, mangled interpretations of your favourite characters and making sure they haunt you in your dreams. meet me in the fuckin' pit, babe. reread the series, actually think about it and come with receipts that aren't Voldemort, because i don't think you want to have the same opinion as the character who canonically doesn't understand love, now, do you, sweetheart? when you do that, then, and only then, will i consider entertaining your bullshit :)

that's about it from me, thanks for reading!

I just wanna enable you to talk more about Katsuki so. top 5 (or 10, or however many you feel like) Bakugou romantic ships? not like number 1 will be a surprise but hey ;p

ah, shipping. the perfect topic with which to take a breather from leg puns and the quirkless!Bakugou debate. nothing controversial about ships lmao.

disclaimer: these are literally just my favorite Bakugou ships, as asked. I have few to no NOTPs, and I’m not anti-anything, nor do I have any opinions on whether or not any of these will or should become canon (as it really makes no difference to me, since I ship them all platonically as well). basically I have no skin in the “shipping somehow has winners and losers” game. I’m just here for the emotional energy and the lulz and the character development.

anyways this is a top six because I couldn’t bear to leave either of my two favorite rarepairs out whoops.

BakuDeku - like you said anon, not a surprise lol. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again; for me, these two are the core of the series. honestly it sometimes strikes me as ironic that this ship is so often written off as abusive or unhealthy or toxic, because I often find myself thinking that roughly 90% of all of Bakugou and Deku’s problems could be sorted out just by them communicating with each other. and I don’t mean just their own specific relationship problems -- I mean all of their problems. Bakugou is having an emotional crisis about something? have him talk to Deku. Deku’s overwhelmed by a problem and way overthinking it? have him talk to Bakugou! they balance each other out, is the thing. when one of them veers off course, the other is the compass to steer them back on track. that’s the power of rivals!! and aside from that, this relationship is just so complex, and I am weak for absolutely all of it. it’s just this perfect blend of push and pull and friction and trust. it’s the type of ship where the two of them have such a strong connection that it’s like gravity; they can’t help but orbit the other, even when that orbit is sometimes unsteady. it’s just such a powerful bond and just... guh. I have way too many emotions about it so I am just going to STOP NOW and move on to the next ship.

TodoBaku - so by now we have reached a point where pretty much everyone in class 1-A is an expert on handling Bakugou, and ngl, it’s my favorite thing ever. but what makes the TodoBaku relationship so especially appealing is that Shouto is completely unafraid to just step right up and declare his friendship to the entire world. Todoroki “I’m calling it like it is” Shouto, who, after giving the matter careful consideration, correctly judged himself and Bakugou to be the closest of friends, and thus decided that they should intern together and he should introduce him to his family and get his sister to cook his favorite foods. and the entire time, Bakugou is all “please no one listen to this delusional freak, we are not friends at all,” even as he proceeds to get himself involved in all of the Todoroki family drama, and saves Shouto’s brother’s life, and learns all of his sister’s recipes, and presumably cries himself to sleep at night wondering how he could have let this happen.

Kacchako - what I like about Ochako’s relationship with Katsuki is that she’s one of the few people who’s not afraid to call him out on his shit. she’s not just warmly tolerant of him like some of the others; she has expectations of him, and will unabashedly express her sound disappointment if he fails to be the person she knows he’s capable of being. I feel like Ochako has no patience for him taking his sweet time with his character development, and is just “goddammit young man, just sort your shit out with Deku already and go back to being best friends like you both so clearly want, and while you’re at it please try to treat other people less like garbage”, and various other things that are all true but that he of course hates to hear, but TOO BAD lol. anyway so I love that, and I love that she’s just as stubborn as he is. and I also love that there’s genuine, mutual respect between the two of them as well. never forget that Katsuki is the one who first brought out Ochako’s homicidal badass side. anyway so they basically complement each other very well, and I have my fingers crossed that one of these days Horikoshi will decide to actually have them interact with each other again because damn.

KiriBaku - Kirishima, on the other hand, is warmly tolerant of Bakugou, and openly admiring of him even, but it tends to be in a way that brings out Bakugou’s best qualities. Kiri just has this way of bringing out Bakugou’s confidence in himself. like, he’s very good at saying precisely the right words to make Bakugou grin that smirky little grin of his, the one that’s all “oh yeah, that’s right, I’m a badass.” and seeing as Bakugou, for all his pride and bluster, is surprisingly prone to having mini crises of confidence, this is a valued skill that I’m very grateful to Kiri for having! and what’s nice is that Bakugou is very good at returning the favor, since Kiri is prone to crises of confidence as well. the little flashback right before Kiri unveils Unbreakable for the first time is one of my favorite moments in the series. when this ship is firing on all cylinders they really bring out the best in each other. and also they are both dumb bros which is an extremely undervalued dynamic. I love it when Bakugou is all “HEY KIRISHIMA LET ME BLOW YOU UP A BIT” and Kiri is just like “YEAHHHH!” heh.

KamiBaku - and now for the first of the two rarepairs! first of all I would just like to state that I absolutely cannot fathom why KamiBaku is a rarepair to begin with, unless it’s simply because everyone is already too obsessed with the previously mentioned ships. but at any rate it’s a damn shame, because the cuteness of this ship is off the fucking charts, and right now it’s all just going to waste. what I adore more than anything about this ship is the way Bakugou tolerates every single fucking thing Kaminari does and LETS HIM GET AWAY WITH IT. he lets him call him “Kacchan.” he lets Kaminari manhandle him into various getups (the A Band shirt; the Santa outfit) on multiple occasions while putting up absolutely no fight. he basically allows him an almost unprecedented level of closeness, which Kaminari proceeds to BLATANTLY TAKE ADVANTAGE OF at every turn seemingly unchecked! and he is the all time champ at tricking Bakugou into participating in social interactions (tying the ribbon to his foot during the Christmas gift exchange, telling him he won’t get any food at the New Year’s feast if he doesn’t help cook, etc.). he just loves him and wants him to be included. honestly this one of the most adorable relationships in the entire goddamn series and I am tired of it being slept on. the people deserve more KamiBaku dammit.

IidaBaku - last but not least, a relationship between two people who I’m pretty sure have only actually interacted with each other a handful of times, and most of those times involved them shouting at each other! ah, yes. the stick in the mud and the delinquent. god’s natural enemies. except that in this case the “delinquent” is a star student who tutors other kids and goes to bed every night at 8:30, and the stick in the mud once hatched a legitimate plot to kill a man. what I am trying to say is that these two are actually WAY more alike than they would ever care to admit, and I’m kind of obsessed with it?? this is one of those ships where all it would take is one well-applied trope and the possibilities are endless. you could literally just pick one out of a hat. fake dating, roommates, only one bed, undercover as lovers, WHATEVER. and not only does this have the potential to be the most hilarious ship in the history of time, but it also has potential to be disarmingly, shockingly sweet, I shit you not. there are a couple of little moments in the light novels that I absolutely adore, where they’re each taking care of the other with the other having absolutely no idea. Iida makes about four attempts to tuck Bakugou in during the forest training camp arc because his covers have fallen off and he doesn’t want him to catch a chill, and Bakugou unknowingly returns the favor by preventing Iida from stumbling across the preparations for his own surprise birthday party before the others are finished getting ready. by shoving Iida into an elevator and ordering him to go back to his room with absolutely no explanation given lmao. anyway, but the point is the potential is definitely there for cuteness and chemistry and mutual respect while arguing nonstop like an old married couple.

so there you go! honestly Bakugou somehow has chemistry with just about everyone in his class, which is super impressive for someone with the personality of a rabid wolf spider. god bless him.

Hi!  There are some excellent Obi-Wan and/or Ahsoka fics in the fandom!  Not all of them will necessarily feature a ton of interaction between the characters, but you will have a ton of reading material if you just enjoy reading about the characters!  I have a long archive of fic recs here, where any given list will give you at least something to check out for both characters! But if you want to hit up some of the Must Read Firsts, LET ME HELP WITH THAT. OBI-WAN & AHSOKA: A Future in Crisis by WolfMarauder is a fic where Ahsoka has a vision of the terrible future to come, so she returns to the Jedi,  works through her feelings and starts working on saving the rest of the galaxy. At it’s heart it’s very much an Ahsoka story, about her figuring herself and her relationships out, as much as it is about being a fix-it fic.  There’s such a warmth and charm to this fic that it’s like being in a warm bath and relaxing into it.  There’s very much a plot going on here, a complicated relationship with Anakin because of Everything, but it’s balanced with something that feels really, really good to read. The Journey of the Lights by Pandora151 is a fic that I got sucked into and couldn’t stop until I’d finished the first one, because it’s a Canon Divergent AU where things go just a little differently, things snowball, and it’s painful but so good and ultimately I think things end up in a better place.  Another great fic if you want plot, super satisfying confrontations that have been building for ages, and a progression towards things changing, in a way that’s often not easy, but works. Chosen, not assigned by Lysore is one where, ultimately, Anakin and Ahsoka’s relationship became absolutely incredible and Yoda was right about how good they were for each other, but what would it have been like if things were nudged a little to the left and she’d been chosen by Obi-Wan instead?  That she’d felt directly wanted from the beginning instead?  And it’s a lovely piece that explores that! Tano and Kenobi by FireflyFish is a time travel fic with Ahsoka going back to the past, taking a young Obi-Wan as her Padawan instead.  The fic is admittedly pretty hard on Qui-Gon, as well as their dynamic is different here because this is an Obi-Wan who is not yet an adult, but Ahsoka is, so they’re very changed from how they were before.  But it’s two and a half novels worth of plot and development and fun and angst and action!  It’s an incredibly written fic and does so much to really build up what it’s going for and really earns the massive changes it’s making.  Fishy is an amazing writer and I love the wide span of dynamics she gets into this story, so many different relationships, even as Ahsoka & Obi-Wan is the central one!  PLUS TIME TRAVEL FIX IT FIC, YESSS. Declarations by Nny11 is a series of scenes exploring Obi-Wan and Ahsoka’s relationship and I always like anything I read by this author.  I haven’t finished this one yet, but I’ve enjoyed what I’ve read of Close But No Cigar (Ahsoka-centric fic where the timeline is changed a little and she’s Yoda’s Padawan instead and it spirals out from there) and Let's Try This Again with a time-traveling Ahsoka in toddler form (so it’s more Obi-Wan & Anakin & Ahsoka) is probably my favorite of the author’s! Waiting and Learning by otherhawk is a lovely piece for Obi-Wan & Ahsoka that’s balanced between hilarious antics and the more painful aspects of what it means to be a psychic space wizard who wants to help people.  There’s such kindness here, even as it aches, in a way that’s very deftly done. The Only Way Through by victoria_p (musesfool) is a shorter piece, but has this really well done balance between the familiarity between them and yet how they’ve both grown so much older, during Obi-Wan’s time on Tatooine.  There’s so much pain in the background, but that doesn’t mean there’s not still moments and sparks of light to be found, which is perfect for them. Under a purple sun... by Perspicacia is Obi-Wan helping Ahsoka with her homework and it’s short but so lovely, it does a fantastic job with their dynamic and weaves in a few really nice details about Jedi philosophy that are hinted at, and is just warm and charming exactly as it should be. The Ryloth Excursion by Icarus_is_flying is one I love, where Obi-Wan and Ahsoka are on Ryloth, where she asks some questions that don’t have easy answers (but aren’t awful questions, either), and Obi-Wan’s guidance as her grandmaster is absolutely wonderful. Knight-Errant by zinjadu is about three novels worth of fic, which doesn’t have a lot of them interacting directly, but Ahsoka is probably the most central character and Obi-Wan has a lot of scenes in it, plus SO MUCH PLOT.  I’ve read about a third of the series so far and it’s incredibly engaging, where Ahsoka’s choice to stay with the Jedi helps shift things a little to the left, then a little more to the left, and suddenly everything is snowballing, all the same pieces we’re familiar with are in different places and maybe they might have a chance!  It is Rex/Ahsoka eventually, but it’s a very slow burn to get there and it’s not the only relationship that’s important to them.  It’s an Ahsoka piece and an ensemble piece and a fix it piece and a huge sprawling plot epic, and I’m loving it a lot. When Darkness Seems to Hide This Place by IllyanaA is another one where Obi-Wan and Ahsoka don’t interact directly a lot, but they’re both very present in the story and get some really excellent scenes.  The Jedi manage to scrape a few more people together, Anakin doesn’t turn on them, so they’re still in the middle of a galaxy that’s hunting them down, but now they might be able to mount a fighting chance sooner than before.  The Obi-Wan & Anakin scenes are stellar, Ahsoka gets her own subplot, and it’s a lot of really excellent plot as they figure out how to rebuild in this new Empire. Echoes of Mortis by orphan_account is more Obi-Wan & Anakin + Anakin & Ahsoka, but both are well done here, and the plot is excellent.  It’s marked as incomplete, but I would say that it reaches a place of good resolution and I felt satisfied by the ending!  In a Canon Divergent AU, where Anakin remembers everything that happened on Mortis, things go a little differently.  Which is very, very much not the same as easier, but it does lead to better places, even when everything is painful and ouchy in the best ways.  A lot of angst, but the kind I eat up with a spoon, it was so good. Obi-Wan and the Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad (Life) Day by orphan_account is charming and adorable, that Obi-Wan’s life day is beset upon him by the people who care about him and it’s just an absolute JOY to read. OBI-WAN KENOBI: Fire and Ice by Yesac is the one fic I always, always come back to, the one I keep rereading and the one I would put at the very top of my list of fics that I think really wrote Obi-Wan brilliantly.  Oh, sure, there’s some stuff I disagree with, a few brief bits of the Jedi weren’t allowed to love or the like, but they’re extremely minor in a fic that shows otherwise.  This is a fic where Anakin won the duel on Mustafar and kept Obi-Wan and Padme hostage both, unable to let either of them go.  This is an Anakin who has this tremendous power but no core of self-understanding, so he’s legitimately unstable, you feel how fragile and cracked he is.  In comparison, Obi-Wan is steady and unbreakable, even when he’s entirely human.  This fic gets the balance of that, of who Obi-Wan is and how he relates to Anakin Skywalker, in that way that I can’t even be coherent about because it’s so well done.  Yeah, I’m probably overhyping it, but this one is just my fucking jam. starbird by imaginarykat is the other fic that I always come back to as a fic that really gets Obi-Wan Kenobi, the mix of flirtation and humor and seriousness and insight and how he’s both direct and wily at the same time, that Anakin’s just kind of spun around by him when Obi-Wan really focuses on him.  Yeah, wicked thing is the more popular one by this author (for good reason!) but I always love starbird for the one I can point to as a more canon-friendly version of Why I Love Obi-Wan Kenobi So Much.  (Obikin.) The Dark Path Lit by Sun and Stars by A_Delicate_Fury is a brilliantly done time travel fic where Obi-Wan, Luke, Leia, and Han end up back in the past and even in just the smallest of gestures, this fic gets Obi-Wan, all the more so because it’s balancing a character who is both the General Kenobi of the war and the Old Ben of Tatooine as they suddenly find themselves occupying the same mental space! Cataclasm by dendral is another excellent fic that does right by Obi-Wan’s character, where he gets a vision of something and decides he needs to take another path in this terrible war they’ve all been dragged into.  He takes Waxer along for the ride, going around the galaxy where the Force leads them, getting into batshit Jedi scrapes, trying his best to save people, and it’s this really beautifully done action fic, buddy fic, and examination of what the war has done to the Jedi and why it’s such a tragedy. The Living Force; Parables for Padawans by glorious_clio is a beautiful piece for both Obi-Wan as a character and for a story-within-a-story about what a Jedi fairy tale would be like.  It does such a beautiful job of telling interesting stories, the kind that would be used to make generations of Jedi think and turn them over and find meaning in them, while also illustrating the deeper meaning of the lines that make up their most famous meditation mantra. Stunning work. Supreme Chancellor Obi-Wan Kenobi by stonefreeak is an ensemble piece, but it’s centered around Obi-Wan and is really great if you’re a fan of his character, where he has pretty much The Most Exasperating Day Ever and winds up elected as Supreme Chancellor of the Republic and then everything starts slowly inching towards the left, now that the Jedi and the good people of the Senate have some actual breathing room.  It’s about what might have been possible in a galaxy with a little more good faith to go around, as well as a great look at Obi-Wan’s relationships with various characters.  An absolute scream to read, but also a really delightful plot. Remedial Jedi Theology by MarbleGlove is a fic that is very much based on Legends, rather than on canon/George Lucas’ Star Wars, so you have to roll with that when you pick this fic up (which I find useful to note mainly in the context of those who find my recs useful/want a heads up, never really as a value judgement), but what you’ll get is an incredibly thoughtful, warm-hearted fic that I found to be incredibly engaging and charming. The entire fic is about Obi-Wan trying to figure out just how to train Anakin and how to fit him into the bigger structure of the Jedi Order, how to adjust himself and that structure to better fit his new Padawan and the other Jedi learners, but in a way that’s also about understanding why they’re set up the way they are, about how deeply caring they are, and how thoughtful they are. It’s a good faith look at the Jedi and a great look at Obi-Wan’s character. Reprise by Elfpen is another fic that I’m only a third of the way through so far (I’ve been hoarding it for awhile) but it has some absolutely stellar Obi-Wan characterization, who is someone that’s really Seen Some Shit, who feels kind of lost sometimes, who feels things very deeply, but who also has a kind of strength that allows him to continue rising above.  It’s not that he’s untouchable by mortal feelings, but that he’s used to understanding himself, acknowledging himself, and working through what needs to be worked through.  Combine this with some really stellar writing for Qui-Gon, for Obi-Wan’s younger self, for the other Jedi around him, for the plot, and it really is one of the best fics in the fandom. The Exchange by MissLearn is one of those that I absolutely fell in love with, where Obi-Wan and Anakin exchange places with their TPM and pre-ROTS selves, which leads to a lot of shit hitting the fan in a way that is forcing things to a head a little earlier, so they can deal with it in a way that they couldn’t in canon.  It’s a great look at their relationship, both the beginning of it and the established one, as well as the glee of having them in different eras and seeing how they react/how the people around them react! The Hand Dealt by not paranoid enough is another favorite, where it’s about a simple twist that changes so much--instead of Qui-Gon going to Tatooine, it’s Obi-Wan who meets Anakin first, and that shifts everything to the left just enough that everything is so recognizable and yet different.  It’s an engrossing read as things happen differently, some good and some bad, and it’s an amazing read. Though Lovers Be Lost by panharmonium is a shorter but absolutely fantastic look at Obi-Wan’s character.  I love all of pan’s fic, The Mathematics of Repair and Take My Waking Slow are both great looks at Obi-Wan and Anakin’s early days, but I think the first one is a great starting place for a fan of his character, it’s beautifully written. After the Pillars Come Down by Virgo827 is a fic that deserves so much love because it’s one of those that, aside from the acknowledgement of Obikin, it could have fit right into an episode of The Clone Wars.  It does a lovely job of Obi-Wan being level-headed and focused, but that something about Anakin makes him lose his mind a little, that Anakin is that one person that he finds it difficult to remain calm about, which speaks to how blind he was towards Anakin’s faults, because he loved that guy so much.  It also has a real, genuine plot that’s a fantastic read, it has amazing Anakin moments, and it was an incredibly satisfying read. Equinox by lilyconrad is a fic I’ll never not be biased about, because it was written for me and tailored to my wants, but I genuinely hold this up as one of the best examinations of Obi-Wan’s character and his relationship with Anakin, as it moves from one of friends to one of lovers.  It’s a look at what having Sith versions of themselves means for parallels and contrasts alike, what that forces Anakin and Obi-Wan to understand about themselves and their feelings towards the other.  And it has a fantastic plot!  Every chapter of this fic was one I wrote like three paragraphs of a rec for because it had such thought and care put into it, so it’s probably always and forever my #1 Obikin fic. Upfall by bell (belldreams) is a stellar Obikin read for both Obi-Wan and Anakin’s characters, where so much thought has gone into each chapter, as well as some incredibly building tension and breaking.  This is a fic that is very, very aware of Anakin’s character arc in canon and the things he does there, as well as it’s an incredible look at Obi-Wan trying to balance his own boundaries, that he’s allowed to have his own internal world that’s not just about Anakin, versus that Anakin is the one he’ll always choose, even when he’s being a shit.  Seed is another one I love (Anakin contracts a virus that means he needs to give Obi-Wan blowjobs and then, oh, no, feelings happen) that does an amazing job of looking at the characters and digging into the issues they have.  bell really gets the both of them and these are incredible reads for them. Pas de Deux by Ghost_Owl is a lovely look at Obi-Wan and Anakin and Ahsoka.  Well, it’s primarily Obi-Wan and Anakin, but it’s about Anakin’s relationship with Ahsoka in the background as well, shown through the lens of Obi-Wan & Anakin.  I love this one because it’s about how difficult it is to balance that Obi-Wan was his Master, but is now his friend, that Anakin bends over backwards to lash out sometimes, instead of listening, instead of still accepting Obi-Wan’s guidance, but that they can muddle their way through to something good again.  And its characterization is lovely, too! AHSOKA TANO: What We've Become by Vinyarie is probably my favorite Ahsoka fic, where the first one is an absolutely gorgeous look at her getting trapped on Malachor with Vader, where they have to depend on each other to live, which gives them time to breathe and then argue some more.  The characterization for her is spot-on, where she is a grown woman who is settled in her own skin, that she still feels deeply but she has a hell of a grip on herself.  That she may not be a Jedi anymore, but she still carries their teachings in her heart, and that strength of her sense of self is beautifully shown.  The second fic is one where she visits Obi-Wan on Tatooine and I loved the conversation they have, as well as the digging into her character even further and what she really wants from here. time to change the road you’re on by wreckageofstars is time travel fic with Ahsoka and is another absolutely stellar look at her character, that it’s partly about her relationships with others (especially Anakin) but is also about her coming to understanding about everything around her and even herself somewhat.  This is an older Ahsoka, the one who has settled into her own skin more, and it’s a beautiful look at her AND a time travel plot! Old Sins Cast Long Shadows by zarabithia is an AU where Anakin died in the fight against Palpatine and the galaxy has to continue on without him.  Ahsoka takes up the job of protecting Padme on Tatooine, giving her time to heal from everything that’s happened, as well as Obi-Wan eventually joins them, and it’s a lovely look at Ahsoka’s character and the dull ache of Anakin being dead in this universe, but knowing that things are so, so much better here. Strange Meetings by gilestel is a beautiful post-Return of the Jedi scene between Ahsoka and Luke, where they don’t have much time to talk, but the potential of it and promise of it and just the immediacy of the moment are all lovely. memories like ashes at our feet by ambiguously is another shorter fic but a fantastic one where Ahsoka is stranded with an amnesiac Vader and has to walk the line between that this is something of her Anakin back, but also that this is still Darth Vader and he could regain his memories at any point.  It’s aching and hopeful in all the right places. The Season's Rain by Bythoseburningembers is an absolute scream of a fic, where Lux and Steela and Saw join Ahsoka in the Jedi camp, where they get to see them in a more relaxed state and they are all a bunch of absolute CHILDREN.  It’s one of those fics that could have been bordering on parody, but the strength of the writing and the charm of the characterizations instead makes it a fantastic look at the Jedi and clones being entirely relatable, being family to each other, and I love everyone in this, including Obi-Wan and Ahsoka. The Cave by Ria Talla (ronia) is one where absolutely fell in love with this gorgeous fic because it pulls off a dreamy mishmash of imagery and slipping from one memory/moment to the next beautifully, it does a gorgeous job of making Ahsoka feel unstuck in time after the events on Malachor. Which is wonderful in and of itself, but it lends such a great weight to the cost of traveling through the World Between Worlds as she did, that there’s a reason that it’s not a thing to use lightly, and it’s not punishment, but consequence all the same, as the fic says.  It has some really great characterization for her, too.

nobody (okay, well, 2 people DID ask, but it’s too late to change the title of this essay series now) asked but here are three main humor techniques i apply a lot in my fanfiction | a 2k word long post where i talk humor theory at you for entirely too long

I love humor. A good 75% of my personality is based primarily on whether or not it would be funny and thus, the study and application of comedy is something of a very big huge large interest of mine. I love watching standup comedy, I love telling jokes, but most of all, I love literature that makes me laugh. 

I write humor, and I put a lot of thought into it, and here, I will do the least funny thing ever: I will over-explain my jokes.

Before we do that, we must set some ground rules first. What is humor? Well, in Humor: Its Origin and Development, Paul McGhee contends that no single theory could encapsulate the entirety of humor. Additionally, according to McGhee, humor does not physically exist. It is, instead, a perception brought about by certain scenarios with certain characteristics. What we can take away from here is that first, humor is vast, and there are many ways to both explain it and achieve it, and second, that humor is something caused by certain other things. 

I do not claim to be an expert in humor, just an enthusiast, so what I will not be giving a cheat code to humorous writing. I will, instead, share three techniques that I frequently use and explain how they work.

The three techniques are the following:

INCONGRUENCY: Things that don’t fit.

SLAPSTICK: I hope that doesn’t happen to me.

CHEKOV’S GAG: If the gun is there, it better be funny.

My examples for each of these techniques will come from various sources of media. My examples of my own writing will all be coming from the most recent fanfic I have written, my Polygon Cyberpunk Red high school au “teenagers scare the living shit out of me.” Examples will sometimes have overlap in the technique they utilize, but I’ll try my best to keep everything clear on what exactly I’m trying to explain.

Without further ado, let’s jump right into it!

INCONGRUENCY: Things that don’t fit.

Göran Nerhardt, in McGhee’s book, states that “Humor is seen as a consequence of the discrepancy between two mental representations, one of which is an expectation and the other is some idea or percept.” Nerhardt’s definition of humor is one that relies on incongruity: wherein there is an element that is not in accordance with the other elements. An incongruous element is one that is not the expectation, and in this subversion of expectation, humor is achieved. 

In simpler terms, a congruent situation would be “A man walks into a bar and orders a beer.” An incongruent situation would “A man walks into a bar. ‘Ow!’ He says.” 

In the first example, everything is as expected, and in the second, the word “bar” has the characteristic of being a homophone, a word with different definitions. The second example takes advantage of the other definition of the word “bar”, that is to say a metal tube object, and thus the reaction of the man. 

Incongruency plays on the unexpected, the out of place, and the odd. This technique in particular I learned from writers like Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett. They use incongruence, they use it A LOT but what I want to talk about is, first, its use as a descriptor. 

“The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't.” -Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

“In a distant forest a wolf howled, felt embarrassed when no one joined in, and stopped.” -Terry Pratchett, The Light Fantastic

Description is a fertile ground for humor. You have a thing, there are expectations to how that thing will appear or act, and then you describe it in a way that’s unexpected. I pull this trick off in so many fics, but here is an example from chapter 4 of the high school au.

Mr. Hypo sits at the desk in front of the classroom, staring all three of them down. Vang0, Dasha, and Burger are seated in the stupid circle again, looking at Robbie as it powers up like a man with gout.

Incongruency here is Robbie, the animatronic. Expectation is that it will be described in a robot like manner. Reality is that I describe it having the same condition that occasionally ails my nearly 50 year old father. 

Aside from description, incongruence is also something I play around with in the events of situations themselves. The most clear example I can give is this scene, from chapter 6, is this:

Burger picks up the closest thing.

That thing happens to be Peter.

“Peter!” Burger looks at Peter in the eye as Edmundton picks up a chair and starts menacingly walking towards Burger. He says, very quickly “Do you consent to be used as a self defense projectile!?”

Peter, pigeonly, nods.

“Thank youuuuuuuu!” Burger yells as he throws Peter at Edmundton’s face.

The context of this scene is that Burger has just entered active combat. Combat is serious. Combat is deadly. Combat is hitting and getting hurt. So what’s something unexpected you can do in this situation to make it funny? Have Burger ask a pigeon if it’s alright with being thrown at an enemy, and then make Burger actually throw the pigeon at the enemy. 

Incongruence is something that is present in a lot of humor situations and it’s very, very fun to play around with. Messing around with incongruence makes you think about what is expected in writing and forces you to think outside of the box in a manner that will elicit laughter.

Let’s move on to our next topic now!

SLAPSTICK: I hope that doesn’t happen to me.

Kevin Casper in his article I’m so glad you’re fake! describes slapstick comedy as a physical type of humor wherein actions are done in an excessive, ridiculous, and sometimes violent manner. Slapstick is Mr. Bean exploding a can of paint to paint his apartment. Slapstick is Courage the Cowardly Dog’s eyes popping out of his sockets when he sees something scary. Slapstick is the ending of Polygon’s video on Slapstick and Doom Eternal (a very good video about slapstick and horror violence) where Pat Gill gets hit in the face with a tube of paper. 

The excessiveness of slapstick creates a non-reality for viewers to enjoy in safety. It is a type of humor that revels in the suspension of reality, but more than that, it is a type of humor that you particularly gain enjoyment from because of the fact that it’s not happening to YOU.

Now, I use slapstick comedy sometimes, but I deviate from excessiveness and instead lean more into that last thing I said. I write situations that are funny and that you also don’t want to ever happen to you as a person. One example of “fuck, that’s hilarious, but I hope it never happens to me” is the following scene from Spiderman: Into The Spider Verse, where Miles Morales, invisible, has to find information on Doctor Octavia’s computer. When he accesses the computer, he is met with this.

You don’t want this to happen to you. But damn is it hilarious that it’s happening to somebody else.

When I am creating scenes that I want to be funny, I think about whether or not it would be funnier if I made it excruciating for the characters involved. So excruciating that you really, really, wouldn’t want to be in that situation. An example of this technique in play is from chapter 4 of the high school au, where the gang are in a room they shouldn’t be in, somebody is about to come in and stop them, and they are all at the mercy of a program slowly, slowly uploading.

 “Hey!” The somebody outside says, jangling the doorknob more violently. “Club time is over, nobody should be in this room!”

“Vang0, how long until the program is done?” Dasha hisses.

“43% Uploaded,” Vang0 says, panicked.

“Hurry.”

“I can’t make technology be faster.”

“Who’s in there!” The person outside yells.

“Should I answer?” Burger asks.

“Do not answer.” Dasha says.

Burger nods. “I’m gonna answer.”

“BURGER—”

“WE’RE JUST A COUPLE OF NOT FRIENDS. JUST LOOKING AROUND.”

“Who are you!” The person outside yells.

“Do not answer, Burger,” Dasha says, sounding like this conversation is actively shaving years off of her lifespan.

“But he’s asking,” Burger looks at Dasha then at the door then at Dasha again, looking very nervous.

“Just lie then,” Dasha tells Burger.

“Gotcha,” Burger nods, determined, and turns to the door to yell. “I’M NOT BURGER CHAINZ.”

“Oh my god,” Dasha thunks her head onto Vang0’s shoulder. “Is it done loading, yet?”

“98% Uploaded,” Vang0 says, feeling his blood pressure in a way he’s never felt before.

I make this situation worse for the characters by making Burger completely fail at being stealthy. As one reader told me about this chapter “I love Burger, but if I were in that room, I would strangle him.” Exactly! It’s not a situation you’d ever want to be in! 

But the characters are in it and you get to enjoy their suffering from a safe vantage point as a reader. 

Slapstick comedy is all about making situations outrageous and ridiculous and something readers wouldn’t want to legitimately experience. It’s about tapping into your audience’s mind and wondering what they want to see but not want to go through.

And last but not least!

CHEKOV’S GAG: If the gun is there, it better be funny

The principle of Chekov’s Gun is a principle that emphasizes that objects in a story should have a use. According to Bill in Chekhov: The Silent Voice of Freedom, Chekov says “If you say in the first chapter that there is a rifle hanging on the wall, in the second or third chapter it absolutely must go off. If it's not going to be fired, it shouldn't be hanging there.” 

Chekov’s Gag is that same rule, but instead of the gun going off, the gun better be fucking hilarious at some point. 

The first example I can think of is from Monty Python and the Holy Grail. In the beginning of the movie, King Arthur stops by a castle and asks the guards to tell their master that he is here. This exchange happens:

Now, this, on its own, is already hilarious. It plays on incongruence (guards being very enthusiastic about bird’s holding coconuts and the logistics of that), slapstick (if you were Arthur and you wanted to have a simple conversation, people suddenly talking about birds and ignoring you is not a situation you want to be in), but what about Chekov’s Gag?

To become Chekov’s Gag, this situation must be brought up again in a funny manner later in the movie.

And so it does.

An hour later in the movie, The Knights of Camelot are at the Bridge of Death. There, they have to answer 3 questions correctly. If they do not have an answer, they are shot into a deadly cavern of doom.

King Arthur steps up to answer his 3 questions. Here is what happens:

The African swallow or the European swallow has achieved Chekov’s Gag-age.

Chekov’s Gag is something I’ve only started doing recently, in fanfiction. An example of this in the high school au is that, in the first chapter, I introduce two things. 1) Peter, an overfed pigeon, and 2) Robbie the RoboDog, an animatronic of the school.

Throughout the fic, I don’t forget about Peter or Robbie. I bring them up again and again and I make sure to make their presence not just integral to the winning of the final boss battle in chapter 6, but I make their presence funny.

Chekov’s Gag is a new trick I’ve started doing, and it definitely requires foresight and planning. It makes you think long term but at the same time forces you to think about the things you already have present in your story and make you re-evaluate just how else they could be used. If done correctly, the effect is hilarity, but also deep, deep satisfaction.

So there we have it! Three humor techniques that I use in my fanfiction. Shit that doesn’t make sense, shit you don’t want happening to you, and shit that you saw a while ago which you’ll see again later and when you do, it’ll be awesome.

Thanks for reading! 

Part 2 of my season 12 reaction posts! Find part 1 (Resolution of the Daleks to Fugitive of the Judoon) here!

Praxeus

Thoughts on Doctor Who - Praxeus!

OKAY FIRST. THANK YOU, SHOW, FOR FIXING A BIG ISSUE I HAD WITH THE FIRST SEASON. So they were doing a thing where they’d introduce incidentally queer characters, have a female character mention her wife, stuff like that, only for them to die. This episode had Jake and Adam, married/separated/it’s complicated couple, who face huge amounts of danger, who both come close to dying, but who survive! And have a Big Damn Kiss! And walk off together holding hands! They survived!!

Plotwise, I enjoyed it a ton while watching, although in retrospect it did feel a bit free of danger. The companions were never in true peril because the Doctor can home in on them automatically, and we never got the true scale of the risk of infection, since the only people we saw get infected were in isolated areas. I would have liked to see, for instance, the threat of Praxeus spreading beyond just the very Hitchcockian birds; all of the peril was on an individual level.

Good message, if unsubtle. Mind you, that’s kind of Doctor Who’s thing, and it pisses off conservatives, so all for it, really XD (They must have loved the core relationship in this episode, too!) Like. Subtle doesn’t work. There are literally climate change deniers that exist. Sometimes you actually do have to tell a message with all the finesse of a sledgehammer because .

(Side note, I was deeply concerned when I saw the cowriter was the guy who did the hot mess that was Kerblam!, so at least this was just an unsubtle and kind of questionably written story instead of an actively harmful one.)

The companions: Ryan seems a fair bit more confident on his own? His initial scenes with Gabriela showed that he’s starting to work well even without backup, and picking up the bird proved to be a damn good call. Yaz and Graham were a fun pair, and Yaz got a lot to do when she and Gabriela (again!) got to explore, and I can definitely understand the conflict between curiosity/doing what’s right and safety when it came to the teleport scene. She does seem to be bordering on the reckless. Intriguing!

Minor plot snag - Graham knows how to set up an IV, presumably because of the shitload of time he spent in hospital! …And yet he doesn’t know what a pathogen is?

Friend note!

“fun fact about graham seemingly not knowing what a pathogen is! in my reading of the scene, i saw it as graham knowing what one was. with "Well, I’m glad you asked that…!” he seems like he’s actually sort of pleased with himself, like he’s about to launch into an explanation, and then IIRC there’s a very brief shot at Ryan giving him a Look and Graham immediately changes tone to “…cause I didn’t want to look stupid.” he immediately changes from boosting his own ego to bolstering ryans and im love"

In which case, good shit gooood shit.

SFX - the infection was creepy as shit. The very obviously puppet bird near the lab was hilariously bad.

Apparently the filming was tricky because it was super windy so all the shorts of Thirteen with her hair Like That weren’t planned, it just kind of happened. Love a fluffy ruffled Thirteen.

So anyway. People calling for more plot focus - literally this is the Doctor trying to distract herself and not focus on the plot! This is her avoidance tactic! Emotional honesty? Who’s she? She’ll get back to it eventually, but for now she needs a distraction after being punched in the emotions. Give her that for one episode, c'mon.

Ryan: “…I do a lot of running.”

Graham: “Whatever is giving off those weird readings… is on the other side of that wall!” Yaz: *silently turns scanner around* Graham, not skipping a beat: “…is on the other side of that door!”

Yaz: “I don’t want you to panic, but… we followed one of those things through a teleport and now I think we’re on an alien planet.” Thirteen: “…well, you don’t do things by halves!”

Thirteen: “That’s why you smell of dead bird! I thought you’d changed your shower gel.”

Thirteen: “I’m having half a thought. Ooh, this one tickles!”

Thirteen: “What can I say? I’m a romantic~”

In conclusion, Doctor Who said gay rights.

-

Can You Hear Me?

Thoughts on Doctor Who - Can You Hear Me?

Trigger warning for discussion of depression and suicide.

You know you're in for a wild ride when iView warns for horror themes instead of science fiction themes.

Overall: at first impression, it felt sort of mashed together? There's 14th century Aleppo, and there's 21st century Sheffield, and there's a deep space station, and there's creepy monsters and dream villains; I do kind of wonder why Zellin targeted a random girl in Aleppo as source for his pet monster, although targeting people like Ryan's best friend makes sense if he's deliberately trying to lure the Doctor to him.

The theme, on the other hand, of mental health resiliance and reaching out, was done incredibly well. Oh yeah there'll be more comments about it - the Guardian described it as 'adventures in Wokeness' - but damn, sometimes you need to hear it. I loved getting more of Yaz' backstory, about being a desperate teenage runaway at the point of being suicidal, and her reunion with the older woman legitimately made me tear up.

But like, goddamn. Her nightmare - she's still hearing that. She's still hearing her sister saying that she should "do it right this time" and that this time she won't call and that no one is coming and holy fuck. God this makes so many of Yaz' scenes incredibly painful in retrospect, knowing that she was at that point only three years before and that she's still dreaming that shit! It makes her recklessness terrifying!

Ryan's nightmare, and his experience with Tibo - it's quite reflective of the Doctor, too. She wasn't there, and Gallifrey burnt. And Ryan is realising this now, and really thinking about the potential future in Orphan 55. I think this is absolutely foreshadowing Ryan leaving at the end of the season (there's been a lot of speculation given Tosin's new TV role), and I think Ryan and Yaz' discussion at the end of the episode was a definite hint in the direction of Ryan choosing to going back to Earth.

Would have really liked Graham, during his talk with the Doctor, to gently remind her that she can talk about her own problems, although I can understand the narrative choice on why she didn't (although, yeah, would have been good for Graham to ask). Because, yeah, if anyone needs a sympathetic ear (...sans fingers) or a shoulder to lean on, it's her!! The entire theme of this episode was like... reaching out. Conquering your fears with the help of others. Sharing your fears to lessen them. Getting help. And the Doctor deliberately... not doing that makes it into an actual Thing that I think is going to seriously be addressed by the end of the season.

It's been such an ongoing theme. A bunch of episodes have started with an obviously depressed Doctor. The Fam has tried to raise the issue multiple times and have discussed it amongst themselves even more. Scenes like Yaz' reaction after being abducted in Spyfall (...which makes her, "I thought I was dead" part even more worrying) and being comforted by Ryan, not the Doctor... her whole reaction to Graham being like, "I'm glad you talked to me but I literally can't do the same in return" - if it's not addressed by the end of this season, it's at least going to have to be an ongoing theme, because it's becoming very deliberate now.

An interesting note: the actor who played Zellin (an immortal manipulator of nightmares) also voiced the Remnants (who were the first to mention the Timeless Child in The Ghost Monument). Coincidence or deliberate?

Assorted thoughts:

"I'm still quite socially awkward." There's socially awkward and there's emotionally repressed... (I saw a description of it on Tumblr as 'weaponised dissociation' and... yeah. And also yikes.) Also the way she was so closed in on herself, basically hugging her arms to her body! On a semi-related note, talking to herself in Aleppo was a bit depressing. Like it's continuing the theme of The Doctor Does Not Like Being Alone.

The finger thing - ew ew ew ew it's in their EARS ewww D:

Stylistic comment: the traditionally-styled animation for the Immortals' game was gorgeous.

"Try not freak out, yeah, but you're on a floating space platform trapped in a gravitational pull between two colliding planets."

"Thanks for lending a helping hand!" Companions just being, "...Doctor p l s."

On an old lore note, loved the callback to Eternals, Guardians, and the Toymaker! On a concerning note, man, the Doctor has so many issues with immortals. They abandoned Jack, there was the punishment they gave the Family of Blood, they had those Issues with Ashildr (from what I've read), now this, an eternal punishment with no chance of redemption, perhaps because she knows what immortality does? Parallels with the Doctor as quasi-immortal too, which Zellin even pointed out.

"You're wrong about humans. They're not pathetic. They're magnificent. They live with their fears, doubts, guilt. They face them down everyday and they prevail. That's not weakness. That's strength. That's what humanity is."

(Contrast: "That's what humanity is." The Doctor isn't human. She's not prevailing against her fears, doubts, and guilt.)

In conclusion, literally everyone but the creepy immortals needs a hug.

-

The Haunting of Villa Diodati

Thoughts on Doctor Who - The Haunting Of Villa Diodati!

tfw you think you're just going to get a nice spoopy historical and instead get major plot?

Overall impression: Well, Jack is going to be pretty miffed, given that the Doctor had to do precisely what he didn't want to happen - giving the Lone Cyberman what it wanted. To save Shelley, and also to save the future, although that does bring up the question on if the death of one person can rewrite the future, why doesn't that apply to literally everyone? Fletcher the valet and Elise the nurse died too, do their deaths have the same impact? Either way, the Doctor takes the Cyberium for herself - then realises that the Cybermen are inevitable, and returns it. And now she's trying to go and stop them. So... a bit conflicting in the message there, I think.

Yeah. Bit of a Trolley Problem there.

The characters were really fun. I did enjoy seeing Mary's sense of morbidness, but also her kindness and sympathy towards the Cyberman; you can see the foundations of Frankenstein there. I'm seeing some criticism of how Byron was portrayed as a coward, but eh. Nice little callback to Ada. Also I love how one of the rules was 'no one snog Byron'. Put that dirty boy back, you don't know where he's been! Glad Claire realised that too, although historically, she was already pregnant with his daughter at that point (and that didn't go well at all)... Either way. Good display of all these bright young reckless things.

(And yes, they were young. Byron was the eldest at 28. Shelley was 23, Polidori was 20, Mary and Claire were just 18. And while Claire lived to 80 and Mary to her 50s, the three men all died young, too - Byron at 36, Shelley at 29 - yes, from drowning, Polidori at just 25. Also wasn't mentioned that Polidori also created something on that Dark And Stormy Night along with Mary's Frankenstein - he wrote The Vampyre, the first modern vampire story!)

The Lone Cyberman (and I am deliberately using that instead of 'Ashad') - creepy as shit. Not just the whole Frankenstein look, but the way he acted! Not emotionless and blank, but actively manipulative and sadistic! Mary showed empathy and he actively threw it back in her face! I mean, yikes.

House was terrific and also spooky as hell. (Am lowkey miffed that no one went "VIBE CHECK!") The jumbled layout was quite Castrovalva, and I actually really dig that Graham got to see some actual ghosts. Ghostly sandwiches!

I think we got actual confirmation here that Yaz does have feelings for the Doctor? (Bleeding Cool News is pretty sure that it was for Ryan, but... lmao no.) BBCA twitter certainly thinks so!

Claire: "His answers only increase the enigma." Yaz: "I know someone like that." Claire: "This enigmatic person of yours... would you trade them for reliable and dull?" Yaz: "My person's a bit different..."

I MEAN.

(It got deleted. So. There is that.)

Thirteen: "Hmm. Fourteenth... no. Fifteenth century... touch more umami." (Doctor, have you been playing Detroit: Become Human again?)

Mary: "I don't think they're really from the colonies!" Byron: "No, she... is from somewhere much, much stranger." Polidori: "The North."

Thirteen: "YOU HAD ONE JOB."

Cyberman: "You appear courageous. But your vital signs betray a heightened state of anxiety." Thirteen: "Or as I like to call it... Tuesday."

Thirteen: "Yeah, 'cause sometimes this team structure isn't flat. It's mountainous, with me at the summit, in the stratosphere, alone. Left to choose. Save the poet, save the universe. Watch people burn now, or tomorrow. Sometimes even I can't win."

Claire: "You pursued Mrs Doctor without a care for my presence, belittled my thoughts and opinions... and then proceeded to use my person as a human shield." Byron: "...And?" Claire: "And the spell is broken... my lord." Polidori's face: "haha you fucked up dude"

Next week: Shit Hits The Fan.

-

Ascension of the Cybermen

In lieu of a proper post for Ascension of the Cybermen, here are a list of questions we need an answer for.

Will Graham and Yaz survive, on a giant carrier full of Cybermen?

Who is Brendan, and what is his relevance to the story?

What is the Boundary?

How is Gallifrey in the Boundary?

How was the Master in Gallifrey, and not trapped by the Kasaavin?

Who is Ko Sharmus and why am I getting Yana vibes?

Who is Ashad and what is his story? (And why is his theme such a literal banger?)

Is he an actual Cyberman? Because I'm totally getting this impression he's human in armour?

How did Brendan survive being shot, and why did his non-ageing father and mentor do that?

Why did it look like a chameleon arch?

Is Ethan's tech-savvy just warzone familiarity or something more sinister?

Are there any other large human populations left?

Was I detecting a hint of romantic tension between Graham and Ravio?

What's up with Yaz?

Why did the Cyberium get sent to that time period?

Who or what is this alliance Jack is a part of?

How do the Time Lords and the lie of the Timeless Child come into it?

WHO THE FUCK IS BRENDAN?

-

The Timeless Children

WELL THEN.

While I gather proper thoughts on The Timeless Children, here are the questions I had from Ascension of the Cybermen, now with answers!

Will Graham and Yaz survive, on a giant carrier full of Cybermen?

Yup! Disguises for the win!

Who is Brendan, and what is his relevance to the story?

Brendan is a filtered overlay memory of one of the Doctor's former lives.

What is the Boundary?

An anomaly, as far as I can tell.

How is Gallifrey in the Boundary?

No idea!

How was the Master in Gallifrey, and not trapped by the Kasaavin?

No idea!

Who is Ko Sharmus and why am I getting Yana vibes?

A big damn hero.

Who is Ashad and what is his story? (And why is his theme such a literal banger?)

We're still not actually sure. Either way, he's an action figure now.

Is he an actual Cyberman? Because I'm totally getting this impression he's human in armour?

Yeah, sort of.

How did Brendan survive being shot, and why did his non-ageing father and mentor do that?

Because Time Lords.

Why did it look like a chameleon arch?

It's probably related technology! If the chameleon arch rewrites memories, this one just wipes them.

Is Ethan's tech-savvy just warzone familiarity or something more sinister?

Just warzone familiarity. Poor li'l bean.

Are there any other large human populations left?

Possibly! If the Boundary really did send them to random places, there still could be surviving pockets elsewhere in the universe.

Was I detecting a hint of romantic tension between Graham and Ravio?

Maybe a bit XD And now they're all on Earth, who knows?

What's up with Yaz?

Who knows?

Why did the Cyberium get sent to that time period?

Ko Sharmus sent it. Didn't send it far enough.

Who or what is this alliance Jack is a part of?

Same organisation Ko Sharmus is part of. Also, young!Ko Sharmus/Jack please.

How do the Time Lords and the lie of the Timeless Child come into it?

In so many ways.

WHO THE FUCK IS BRENDAN?

The Doctor!

More thoughts later!

-

Thoughts on Doctor Who - The Timeless Children.

...Actually, first thought is the title. Timeless Children? Hmm.

Anyway. That is... sure a literally mind-blowing revelation for the Doctor, yes! Like, damn, the discovery that you're not even the species you thought you were, that your adoptive parent spent lifetimes abusing and experimenting on you, that your memories were routinely erased by people you thought you could trust (including your adoptive parent), that you're literally the progenitor for your entire species, that you've lost who knows how much time and who knows how many memories... yeah. Damn.

What's an appropriate birthday present for someone turning ten million?

Also, huh. Amidst all the old lore and casual mentions (like Borusa!) that got mentioned - were they taking hints from the Cartmel master plan? About the Doctor being some kind of founding figure for Gallifrey? Not exactly written as Cartmel had it, but that big main concept of the Doctor as a sort of... foundation piece of Time Lord culture was still actually there.

Brain of Morbius Doctors confirmed, I guess. I guess even Four was going, "...the fuck?"

Cybermen = still scary. Regenerating Cybermen = felt somehow obscene. Like, no, that's just fundamentally not right. Like the TARDIS responding to Jack by noping the fuck out kind of not right. God. And the Master was completely and utterly magnificently batshit, like, more than usual, come on, dude, you know they'd kill or convert you the second you turned your back.

Still. Deeply, deeply entertaining to watch just from a villain perspective, completely Chaotic, and like... I do understand where he was coming from? His entire life is a lie. His entire life is because of the Doctor, who, I think it's fair to say, he has Complicated Feelings regarding. (Their entire interaction this episode was a giant power play. Like damn guys just get into BDSM and leave the would-be genocide and universal takeover.)

Tecteun = Rassilon, I'm assuming. Goddamn. Like they were a pompous abusive asshole from the outset, this just kind of makes it worse. I also wonder if Rassilon chose the Master specifically to get the drums because he was friends with the Doctor? That actually may have been something the Master worked out himself, too. I mean, I'd be pissed off as well :-\

Also, how many people know about this? I assume Gat knew, since she was implied to be responsible for the mind wipes, but was it like... a super tightly-held secret or was it something a lot of higher-ups knew? Because that's fucked up tbh

Thought on the Master. Okay, he's hugely furious that he's been lied to, that the entire origin of his people is based on a lie, that his greatest friendrivalloveenemy is incredibly special and that a part of her is in him and not in the fun way, but like... I'm also wondering if he's looking at the Time Lords, the way they turned him into their puppet, how they drove him insane for their own purposes, then looked at the Doctor - someone who has also been used, abused, experimented on, manipulated, controlled, and went, "No. This is an injustice and the Time Lords need to be punished for it."

Oh, saw a nice theory regarding the TARDISes - Ruth!Doctor had the original busted police box TARDIS. When she was eventually taken in to be mind-erased, they sent the TARDIS off to storage to be eventually repaired. The Doctor manages to steal that one, goes to Earth, and it immediately gets stuck again because it's still broken. Explains how Ruth!Doctor can have the police box while also being pre-everything.

I really want the Doctor and Jack to sit down and have a nice chat about being timeless undying constants of the universe. Also for Jack to get one of the spare TARDISes around. Be kinda funny if he got the Master's old one, given the Year That Never Was, but it really is just sitting there. (Poor TARDIS stuck as a tree on a random wartorn planet in the far future, though!)

Also, Jodie was fucking magnificent in this episode. The hurt, the absolute fury, the almost glee when she's telling the Master he can't break her, her refusal to press the button at the end (so much like Nine's "coward or killer?" moment!)... just... so good.

Beautiful post I saw here on Tumblr - the Doctor as the Timeless Child, making the choice to help.

Amazing post here on Tumblr about abuse and repressed memories. Even if the Doctor doesn't remember it all, the abuse they underwent at the hands of a beloved parent figure still informs a hell of a lot of their behaviour, but it doesn't define them. The Doctor's need to run = informed by abuse. The Doctor's desire to help crying children = informed by abuse. The Doctor being an inherently good person = being their own person, no matter what their upbringing, no matter what their past was. They made the choice to be the Doctor, and that's a hell of an important thing.

Extremely painful post I saw on Tumblr about the Doctor being 'hip with the kids' by calling her companions her Fam but hell if they're not more family to her than her actual adoptive mother ow my heart.

Also, the scene between Yaz and Graham was so sweet <3 I do want to see Yaz, at some point, admit that sometimes she's so terrified she can barely move, and to tell him what she came so close to doing when she was sixteen, and Graham to just go, "Yeah, but you keep going." Also I'm trying not to think about how Yaz would respond to the Doctor going off on a suicide mission when Yaz was suicidal just three years earlier because ow my heart. She knows that Ko Sharmus went after her, she knows the Doctor might be alive, but either way, she's just seen someone she loves leave with the intention of dying (and Ko Sharmus too, actually). Someone please give her a hug. Actually please just let the Fam have a big group hug in general.

"Have you ever been limited by who you were before?" "Huh. Now that does sound like me talking."

So, remaining questions to be answered next season!

What actually is the Doctor? Since they were found near the Boundary, they could be from anywhere. It's fair to say they now are recognised genetically as a Time Lord, but what were they originally, why were they abandoned in the first place, and are there any more of their original people out there?

How do the Remnants know about the Timeless Child, or were they just picking up on that unconscious knowledge from the Doctor's own mind?

Like... we're generally under agreement that the Master, the eternal cockroach, survived, right? Despite definitely being lowkey suicidal like oh, was hoping the Death Particle would kill me? Like the Death Particle was made by the Cyberium, it could have gone, "Nah, keeping this one."

What's going on with the Kasaavin? Remember them? Still out there, stationed all through time and space? And are we going to see Daniel Barton again?

Is something going on with Yaz?

Will the Fam stay on? (I personally think Ryan will elect to stay on Earth to account for Tosin Cole's new TV role, and if Graham and Ravio enter a relationship, he might too.)

When will we see Jack again? If he was connected to the Lone Cyberman arc, that seems... pretty conclusively finished, unless we're going to learn more about it?

Is it Christmas yet?

............so the Christmas/NY special is going to start with Jack using his vortex manipulator to bust the Doctor out of prison and get back to the Fam and it'll never be mentioned again, right.

"At least buy me diNNER!!"

Killjoys for the meme?

the character I least understand: I’ve come to really dislike this question lol. I understand these people!! I’m good at understanding!! They are well written there’s no mystery here!!! xDD

interactions I enjoyed the most: everything, literally everything involving my snobby wife Delle Seyah Kendry. Kendry and Dutch? Delightfully antagonistic with extra UST, family dinners are going to be fun. Kendry and Johnny, with that layer of hostility and legitimate hate? More pls. Kendry and D’avin? EVERY show should have a duo like them. Kendry and both Johnny and D’av? Absolutely hilarious. Kendry and Jaq is super touching. And ofc Kendry and Aneela, a really fucking gr10 otp.

Putting aside Kendry for a moment xDD: Johnny and Lucy (Lucy is the ship’s AI. They’re in love), Jaq and Dutch (their subplot broke my heart in s4), Dutch and her messy, messy family (Aneela, Khlyen, the original Yalena), Dutch and Johnny (non-sexual life partners!!) & D’avin (I was unsure about them at first but they slowly won me over and their s4 subplot with Jaq sold the deal. And all three together are just delightful), Jaq & Aneela (he loves his murder mom SO MUCH!!!). Also, Fancy & everyone. I wish Fancy and Kendry had scenes together but the world might’ve collapsed xDD

the character who scares me the most: if Aneela came after me I would straight up collapse and play dead, no question. The Lady is terrifying too. If someone with her powers existed, I would just abandon the planet xD

the character who is mostly like me: hmm. In some ways I can relate to Johnny I guess? Sometimes to D’av too, which is kind of hilarious.

hottest looks character: Yalena “Dutch” Yardeen. I MEAN:

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(x. And I recommend looking at the entire set, really xD)

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[Caption: gifs of Dutch (sitting in bed covering herself with a sheet pointing a gun; a close-up to her face that shows off her blue yes; looking over her shoulder with a backless fuchsia dress; another close-up while she smiles, with braided hair; in a white dress undercover, with a glass of champagne.]

one thing I dislike about my fave character: first I should finally make an executive decision on who my fave is xDD. It comes to Kendry (she’s such a delight!! She elevates the show!!) and Dutch (I could cry rivers or tears for this woman. RIVERS). For Kendry, I don’t like that she’s not in every episode and that one time she had her hair straight down, it’s not her look xD. Dutch is perfect, flaws and hangups and all.

one thing I like about my hated character: I don’t actually hate anybody here lol. The closest would be Jaqobis Senior, but he’s just so... unimportant. A worm. I’m very happy for Johnny and D’av that he’s out of their lives and proud of how firm they are in that decision though.

a quote or scene that haunts me: Dutch and Khlyen’s (her father figure)     long-awaited confrontation gave me chills (“I want you to stop making me feel small so you can feel big! I want you to stop hurting me so that you can save me. Because the only person I’ve ever needed saving from is you!”). It haunts me. Dutch’s last scene with The Lady too. Or D’av and Dutch’s fight over Jaq in s4 *-*

a death that left me indifferent: this show had few deaths (among mains and recurring characters, I mean) and even fewer permanent deaths -I sympathise with the writers’ reticence so much lol. And the ONLY permanent death that affected me was that of a pretty secondary character in s4 xD. So I guess... everyone else’s. Like, I couldn’t care less about Kendry killing [redacted] in s2 or Aneela killing [redacted] in s3. They were alright and I’m sorry it hurt Johnny and Dutch respectively but *shrugs*.

a character I wish died but didn’t: n/a. I actually dig how squeamish the show is about this xDD

my ship that never sailed: ............ Jaq/The Lady lmfao *hiddes*. I mean, there’s problematic and then there’s “I ship the most precious boy with the ultimate villain who also wants to parasitize his body” LMFAO. But in those last few episodes I was feeeeeeling it. Apparently, I’m the only one because there’s nothing with them in ao3 *grumbles*. This fandom is too small :(((. They’re in my WIP list because it’d actually be     ridiculously easy to write something about them post-series IMO xDD

Maximilian’s Fic Recs

My personal recs for the Miraculous Ladybug fandom. I’ll be rating each story out of 5 stars for both angst and fluff. Honestly, I’ve read a whole lot of stories that I just absolutely love, but these are the top ones that I remember.

I should make a point of saying this— Not all of these are romance fics. In fact, most of these are probably not going to be romance fics. My favourite fics tend to be ones that don’t focus strongly on romance. 

I’m also going to try to be as vague as possibly in my reviews so I don’t spoil anything too much. If you want anything more specific, you should check the summaries the authors put up on their stories, as well as the maturity ratings.

Incomplete and/or Ongoing Fics

Through A Doll’s Eyes — Incomplete Angst:✦✦✦✦✧ Fluff:✦✦✦✧✧ Review: This story is simply phenomenal. It deals with the idea of inanimate objects having a sort of a soul, specifically objects hand-made with love and care. There were many instances in this story where I was close to tears. I loved it, I loved Marinette, her perseverance, and heart of gold. The way she watched over her families over the years and cared so whole-heartedly. I’m upset that there wasn’t more. Unfortunately, it hasn’t updated in a long while, and I don’t think it will in the future.

Red For Fortune — Incomplete/Ongoing(?) Angst:✦✦✦✧✧ Fluff:✦✧✧✧✧ Review: REALLY loved this!!! Honestly, I love any fics that touch on Marinette’s biracial heritage, but this one seriously takes the cake. And I like that this is one of the stories where they don’t make the nice white friend somehow knowledgable of racial issues. They don’t understand what’s racist and what’s not, they don’t understand why Marinette’s so upset, and they need to figure out why they’re wrong on their own. They’re ignorant, aren’t excused for their ignorance, and aren’t portrayed as being a horrible human being at the same time. They fucked up and need to learn a lesson, simple as that.

Voyance — Incomplete/Ongoing Angst:✦✦✦✧✧ Fluff:✦✦✧✧✧ Review: I honestly wasn’t expecting to get so enamored with this story when I first clicked on it, but it quickly dug its way into my heart and planted itself there. It’s an ongoing story that is truly satisfying, to say the least. Characters are told point-blank what they’re like and how they need to improve, and no matter how indignant the character is, they always leave respecting the tarot reader’s abilities. (Except maybe Alya, but that’s for a reason.)

#BonAnniversairePrincess — Incomplete Angst:✦✦✧✧✧ Fluff:✦✦✦✦✧ Review: Truly one of the sweetest fics I’ve read. Marinette being treated like the princess she deserves to be is one of my favourite things to see in fanfic. (If it wasn’t obvious already, I REALLY love her.) 

Missing — Incomplete/Ongoing Angst:✦✦✦✦✦ Fluff:✧✧✧✧✧ Review: No fluff to see here! A good, angsty Marinette-centric fanfic without really focusing on Marinette’s point of view too much, which is something I love quite a bit. The Lila salt is strong in this one, too, which basically makes me love it more and more. I’m anticipating each and every update.

#No R-Agrestes — Incomplete/Ongoing Angst:✦✧✧✧✧ Fluff:✦✦✦✦✦ Review: Honestly Marinette is an absolute walking, talking natural disaster in this and I need you all just to read it please it’s just. So funny and good. 

Complete and/or One-shot Fics

Oleanders and Belladonas — Complete Angst:✦✦✦✦✧ Fluff:✦✦✧✧✧ Review: This is a fic with an akuma that’s treated like a legitimate murder mystery, and I’m in love with it. I’m a HUGE fan of murder mysteries, but I’m also not a fan of children dying or there being too much gore. This is not a terribly gory story and still manages to give you a sense of suspense and thrill, satisfying all my wants. I was positively giddy through a lot of this, and not because it was funny. It was just that good. 

What The Cat Dragged In — Complete Angst:✦✧✧✧✧ Fluff:✦✦✦✦✧ Review: I’m usually not crazy about crossover fics, but this was done rather beautifully. Many characters truly shine in this, both in personality and intelligence, and I sincerely loved every word. Every part of this story is engaging and fun. 

Girl’s Night Out — Complete Angst:✧✧✧✧✧ Fluff:✦✦✦✦✧ Review: This is honestly just one of the most hilarious fics ever. Marinette is a badass, Adrien doesn’t know what the fuck is going on, and everything is practically burning down around them. I couldn’t ask for anything better even if I tried. 

The Second’s Lament; Walking to Paris — Complete/One-shot Angst:✦✧✧✧✧ Fluff:✦✦✦✦✦ Review: This story honestly is just straight up adorable. It’s sweet, long, and calming. It’s just absolutely beautiful, and I wish there was more. I have a soft spot for unusual scenarios like this. I also have a MAJOR soft spot for friendship bordering romantic Marichat. This story encapsulates EXACTLY everything I want in Marichat and I’m just ecstatic about it.

Elephant — Complete Angst:✧✧✧✧✧ Fluff:✦✦✦✦✧ Review: Another absolutely hilarious shenanigans fic that I will NEVER forget. I’m particularly happy over the fact that there’s two endings you can pick from, which is weird because I’m not one to like multiple endings. I suggest reading this when you need a laugh or a pick-me-up, because this will certainly do the trick.

Welcome to WC — Complete/One-shot Angst:✦✧✧✧✧ Fluff:✦✦✦✦✧ Review: Honestly this is so funny and cute at the same time. The fact that these two idiots just ignored everything around them was so funny I can’t even describe it. I found myself struggling to keep quiet. 

Botched Blind Dates — Complete Angst:✧✧✧✧✧ Fluff:✦✦✦✦✦ Review: This is just wholesome all the way through, and also pretty hilarious. I love the whole blind dates trope, especially in AUs, but this concept, which expands on Nino’s interest in film (which I’m VERY happy about), is even better and much more engaging. I also love that Chloe is considered a friend and good person without sacrificing her key characteristics. 

Series

I won’t be putting an Angst/Fluff rating on these since the different stories within the series can have varying levels of angst and fluff.

Unconventional Scenarios — Incomplete/Ongoing Review: I had fun reading all of these stories. At some points it was depressing, in others it was super funny, and sometimes it was just super sweet. 

Allez Savoir Pourquoi — Complete Review: Honestly one of the most well-written soulmate AU’s I’ve read in a while. Marinette and Adrien are adorable in this, and Adrien’s STILL a Big Dummy which I am happy about, because that’s my favourite characteristic of his.

Miraculous: Tales of Littlebug and Chaton Noir — Incomplete/Ongoing(?) Review: I have nothing to say other than you should do yourself a favor and READ THIS. I think about it all the time. Every day. Nothing can possibly top how cute this series is. I daydream about it and giggle randomly sometimes when I remember it. It’s just,,, SO ridiculously cute.

BAMF Mari — Incomplete/Ongoing(?) Review: I honestly love any story where Adrien realises that Marinette’s a badass, and this series takes that idea and ramps it up to a million. It’s funny, awkward, and adorable. I love that it almost entirely switches up the dynamics- Marinette’s calmed down and Adrien’s a total ball of anxiety and teenaged hormones. It’s brilliant. I guarantee you’ll be smiling throughout the whole series.

It Was Only Meant To Be A One-Shot — Incomplete/Ongoing Review: I very recently read this and I loved absolutely every minute of it, and I can’t wait to see the next installation to the series. Every character gets their moment to shine (with the exception of Gabriel), and this includes Emilie Agreste, who isn’t treated as a flawless human being. There’s No Camembert in Tibet, the sequel to the first fic, Plagg and the Butterfly Costume, was completed about two days ago, and I’m very satisfied. And super excited!!!

Some of my angst/fluff ratings may not be totally accurate because I haven’t had the time to reread every fic, but I believe it’s still accurate enough.

This list will definitely be updated in the future.

@involuntaryspy / bucky and tony not another ship meme

who would be the one to randomly adopt a puppy without consultation

honestly this...i don't see being a thing?  at least, you know, not with living things.  with non-living things, it's tony.  it's always tony.  he will always make the big purchase/thing of that nature without stopping to think for two seconds if he maybe should bc he operates on impulse to a degree when it comes to money.  but also if tony were less self-aware about being unable to care for himself, much less another living creature, then yes.  that would also be him, because he has sucker written on his forehead.

who would force the other to take aesthetic pictures of them

didn't we decide bucky is awful at it if it's not for work.  i vividly remember talking about all the cryptic tony on his phone.  anyway, no, this is tony, tony takes the somewhat aesthetic pictures, and most of them are probably bucky and al, no i do not take criticism.  but you also have the random steve and carol and rhodey and whoever else he manages to wrangle.  sometimes he even remembers instagram exists.

who would do stuff they think is stupid just to make the other one happy

isn't...that...what relationship compromise is?  are you telling me bucky doesn't go along with tony shenanigans just because it makes him happy?  are you telling me tony doesn't let bucky drag him places just because it'll make bucky happy?  it's a 50/50 split.

who picks out the horror movies to watch just so the other will cling to them

tony, a child of the 80s, letting anyone else pick?  incorrect.  he picks them.  will anyone actually get scared?  uh, probably not.  besides, tony's one of those...the worse a movie is with a budget of like five bucks and a frosty from wendy's, the more he's gonna want to watch it.  they're hilarious, if anything.

who is constantly studying and who is constantly trying to distract them

this is me looking pointedly at bucky barnes.  it's a game, okay.  it's a game.  how long can tony stay focused with bucky fucking with him.  the answer is longer than you'd think but not long enough to deter bucky.  besides, finding new ways to break tony's laser like focus is always fun.

who initiates the facetime calls whenever they’re separated

honestly, why does it have to be one or the other.  why can't they both do it.  because i bet they both do it.  but i'm also actually willing to bet tony's actually the worst culprit of this.  if he's working it makes being hands-free easier.  if not...he can still say he was instead of admitting he misses bucky's face (spoiler:  he'll still admit he misses bucky's face.)

who is more likely to storm out after a fight and who is more likely to cry when they do

they...actually...really don't...fight.  it's weird.  i mean yeah they disagree, but like...it literally?  never gets to that level?  it's kinda crazy, tbh, how level headed they both are, when tony's a known overreacter and crier.  and the only time tony storms out is when bucky goes one pun or bad pickup line too far.

who stays up way too late binge-watching their favorite shows

honestly, bucky's more likely to try to keep them on a semi-regular sleep schedule, but lbr, they both can't sleep?  sometimes?  so there's that.  but also there's the fact that tony will not go to sleep on the principle of not wanting to go to bed just because, so he's way, way more likely to do this.  the only reason he doesn't actually do it as much as he otherwise would is because he doesn't wanna revisit his contortionist act to get into bed once al lays claim to his pillow.

who bites the other’s ear when they’re feeling frisky

what i will say is that tony is an ear nibbler.  not a biter, a nibbler, because he's kinda soft and gentle all the way around but...i'm just saying.

who sprays the other with water when they’re washing the car

bold of you to assume this isn't a two way street.  i mean have you met tony stark?  have you met bucky barnes?

who has more fun decorating the house during holidays

honestly, i think they both approach it in their own ways with like...some enthusiasm?  but tony's definitely enthusiastic about the ones where he gets to engineer something.  he had a blast on halloween, and i legitimately wonder what he was banned from doing on christmas.

who is more likely to give the silent treatment when they’re mad at the other

human nature aside, tony's not necessarily going to give the silent treatment, because that's not what it is.  tony does, however, go quiet and withdrawn if it's anything other than Right and Justice being debated, if he's...in any way upset.  so take that as you will.

who plays with the others’ hair more

the question you should be asking is when does bucky stop fucking with tony's hair.  never, is the answer.  like tony has a habit of wrapping bucky's hair around his fingers but it's like...and unconscious thing now, he just does it.  bucky actively goes out of his way to play in tony's.  which, you know, fair.  it's really nice hair.

who is more likely to climb all over the other one when they’re bored

they both do this and it's terrible.  tony's big on whining at the same time, too.

who tries to kiss the other as often as they can

they're both smoochy, it's disgusting.  uncalled for.  absolutely unacceptable.

who pouts when the other one tells them to shut the fuck up

do you...do you really think that would work?  like...honestly?  well, first thing, i can tell you what tony's reaction to being told 'shut the fuck up' would be from someone he's put his whole trust in, and it wouldn't be pretty.  like that ain't a good thing, y'all.  and after all the horrible, horrible pickup lines he's suffered from bucky he's not gonna tell bucky to shut up.  so i mean...

who initiates the sex and who walks away when the other is riled up

listen.  you know, and i know, tony has literally done this.  literally.  done.  that.  exactly.  they're both awful when they get in that power struggle mood and then no one gets laid and it's a sad time all around.  use your words, gentlemen.

who always forgets the umbrella and who holds it when they actually have one

tony will literally always forget to bring an umbrella but he'll be the one to hold it if bucky remembers, mostly because tony's taller and it makes things easier.

who demands showering first in the mornings

spoiler:  it ain't tony.

who sneaks into the shower with the other one in the mornings

tony, if he wakes up in time.  guaranteed.  tony's never gonna be the earliest riser, but he knows what opportunity knocking looks like, and he's going to take advantage of it.

who prefers riding the roller coasters and who prefers playing the games

who needs roller coasters when you've got iron man.  also, i have the feeling that some games are banned, or at least need to be.  also consider:  poker night.

who will text the other one thirty times in a row until they respond

tony.  bucky's not a big texter, and tony prefers to text, so he will do this until he gets an answer.  and he will pout when it's one of bucky's one word texts.

who always forgets to charge their phone overnight

i know we said it could go either way, but i'm gonna remind you and the world at large that tony?  forgets to charge things.  remember the chestplate?  remember how he'd let it run down to nothing?  yeah.  like that but less life-threatening usually.

who comes up behind the other and slide their hands into their back pockets

like...i think it's understood on the whole if you're gonna do that to either of them it's probably best to let them know you're there first.  you know, considering.  but also consider the alternative of from the front and yes tony will totally stoop to be able to do it to bucky.

who tries to get hugs from the other as often as they can

remember the smoochy thing?  that, but with hugs.  they're disgustingly cuddly, and they need to not.

who is louder and who constantly has the tell the other to be quiet

honestly, tony's louder in general, but it's also mostly when he's in one of his...arm-wavy let me tell you how wrong you are moods.  you know the ones, where he gets all melodramatic.  otherwise he's...actually not?  discounting if he's suited up bc then he's kinda clanky but.  i feel like they're both those soft footed people that can sneak up on you without meaning to.

HIStory3: Trapped: Review (& General Info)

About the Series:

Summary: A police officer and a gang leader were killed in a gunshot attack four years ago. What's the secret behind this case? The only survivor, Tang Yi, is now the gang leader. Shao Fei is a police officer, who’s been following Tang Yi around for the past four years, trying to figure out what’s really happened during the attack. Will he be able to get to the bottom of the case? And can something unexpected come out of their rivalry? (Trailer)

Couples: Main gay couple, as well as two side couples - one gay, one straight.

Running Time: 10 episodes - around 45 minutes each - 8 hours in total

Cast (& their Instagram pages): Jake Hsu (Shao Fei), Chris Wu (Tang Yi), Andy Bian (Jack), Kenny Chen (Zhao Zi), Diane Lin (Hong Ye), Sphinx Ding (Dao Yi), Zhang Guang Chen (Andy), Stanley Mei (Li Zhi De), [more].

Where to watch? VIKI (if you watch on mobile, you’ll have to download the app).

Related Shows: HIStory is a recurring Taiwanese BL series, however, each season is separate from the others and none of them are connected in any way, so there’s no other Trapped content out there.

My Review:

Rating: 9.5/10

Short review: Trapped is my favorite BL of all time. It has a good plot, fantastic acting, the most wonderful couple ever (whose intimacy is handled incredibly well), amazing characters, awesome friendships and a whole list of other great things. Despite having one controversial character, a slightly questionable background couple and a not-so-satisfying (though still not bad) ending, I don’t think there’s anything that could stop you from enjoying it. And though, as usual,  it’s obviously your own decision to make, it’s definitely a must-watch in my book. 

Extended review (under the cut):

I consider Trapped the best BL that exists to date – without a shadow of a doubt. Not everyone agrees with me and that’s entirely understandable, however, I assure you that even though someone might prefer one or a couple of other BLs to this one, everyone considers Trapped one of the best ones for sure.

The plot of Trapped is thought-out and actually good. It obviously isn’t a masterpiece of modern cinema, however, unlike so many other BLs, the plot actually matters. It’s interesting, gripping, well-thought-out, with a nice mystery and some unexpected reveals that might actually surprise you. Everything gang-related isn’t just there for show – it’s done tastefully and doesn’t seem cheap at all, you truly believe it. So many moments are hilarious, especially in the beginning. And the show is very meticulous and careful with all its little details, so there are no annoying minor plot or aesthetic inconsistencies that could take you out of immersing into it. The pacing of the plot is a tiny bit slow in the first couple of episodes, but it needs that to build itself up properly, and it quickly picks up as soon as it can.

The characters in this show are amazing. You will not only fall in love with the mains, but also adore most of the background characters and hate the rest of them, which just goes to show how much each of them can impact you emotionally because they’re that fucking great. All the details about the characters are well thought-out and awesome too. Tang Yi is not just a gang leader in name – Chris, the actor who plays him, does a fantastic job of showing just how intimidating Tang Yi can be and generally convinces us of him being the Big-Bad-Gang-Boss through so many brilliant subtle acting choices. The villain is actually threatening and terrifying too. Shao Fei can be rather embarrassing and cringy, however, Trapped certainly manages to show that this is truly just his personality, and they’re not just doing this for laughs. Besides, I’ve heard many people who usually get second-hand embarrassment all the time say they didn’t feel awkward for Shao Fei at all – he isn’t embarrassed since this is his true, authentic self, so no one else is embarrassed for him either. Finally, two background queer characters are fantastic. Usually, in other BLs background queer characters, who aren’t there for a romantic plotline, are never anything beyond a stereotype and are always there for laughs. That’s not the case in Trapped. Both of the characters are absolutely incredible, authentic and beautiful – most certainly one of the best background characters I’ve seen in any BLs.

I must note that one character definitely caused some controversy in the fandom, and I can’t say much else beyond this without giving you a gigantic spoiler. However, even though I do think they could’ve handled the topic better overall, I don’t find there’s anything wrong with having one of the many queer characters in the show be a bad person. I’ve talked about it many times and, considering the fact that we still have at least six positively-portrayed queer characters, the seventh being a piece of shit does not affect the representation in any way and doesn’t suddenly give all queer people a bad name. There are shitheads among us too, you know. And it’s important to talk about it.

Moving on, let’s talk about relationships. For starters, the main couple is hands down the best enemies-to-friends-to-lovers you’ll ever see – that I personally guarantee. Their romance is developed well and treated with the care it deserves, and they end up being the most adorable, wholesome couple ever. I also want to especially point out how well Trapped handles their intimacy. A lot of other BLs have their couple treat each other like friends half the time, be dating another half and kissing/having sex on rare occasions. In reality, though, a couple is always intimate with each other. And I don’t mean that everyone fucks like bunnies – no. I mean couples have intimate conversations, hold hands, kiss each other in a million different ways (and on a million different spots), cuddle for no reason, hug, express emotions and, of course, sometimes have sex. Not every couple does absolutely everything I’ve just listed, of course, but you get the overall point. Couples are intimate. And Trapped gets that. It shows that. And that’s wonderful. As for others, the straight background couple takes up just enough screen time to not annoy you and it’s actually kind of cute, which is super rare for me to say. Now, the gay background couple is rather questionable. One of the guys is kind of oblivious and juvenile, while the other pushes him too hard. It’s not so critical that I’d tell you to skip their moments, however, it is definitely food for thought and I’d say pretty problematic.

The friendships in Trapped are sort of a double-edged sword. On one hand, we have Shao Fei and Zhao Zi, who were proclaimed to be best friends, but don’t end up having any meaningful moments together and are really out of the loop with each other’s lives by the end of the show. This can be explained and justified, but I still feel like it’s a little unrealistic. On the other hand, though, we have Tang Yi and his friends – mainly, Andy, The Doctor (whose name I, apologies, don’t remember), as well as Hong Ye and Tang Guo Dong. Despite only seeing a couple of moments with each of them, we get attached to every character and their relationships with Tang Yi very easily. His friendships with Andy and The Doctor are familiar and realistic. His relationship with Hong Ye is deep and authentic – you can truly see they are like siblings to each other. And his relationship with Tang Guo Dong is so beautiful and raw that you end up falling in love with the “found father” trope and wish you had the same relationship with your parents or any mentor figure, really. Despite Tang Yi and Tang Guo Dong only having four small scenes with each other – all of which are flashbacks, their dynamic is my second favorite in the show and their relationship is one of the best father/son relationships I’ve ever seen.

Finally, the show is shot beautifully and the acting in it is on a completely different level. Seriously, you will say, “Holy shit, this actor is so good!” like every other second. I literally grabbed my pen to write some version of “the acting is so good” in my notes, while rewatching the show for this review at least twenty times, and the only thing that stopped me is already having it written down thrice.

The very last note I have is about the ending. Now I will say immediately that this show does not have a bad ending – I could not have it as one of my favorites, if it did, I’m strictly a happy-ending kind of person. However, the ending is still a little too vague for my taste and I wouldn’t say I’m satisfied with it. It’s not the end of the world and overall it’s an alright ending you can live with – nothing bad happens. However, I wouldn’t call it the best ending this show could have – and that’s all I can say without giving any spoilers.

Finally-finally, should you watch this show? Fuck yes! Absolutely, my guy! Have you heard all I’ve just said? It’s brilliant. An absolute fucking masterpiece, I’m telling you. So yes, I recommend it to literally everyone. There is legitimately no other series I want to show everyone as much as this one – this is fucking mandatory in my book. Regardless of however I feel about it though, at the end of the day, it’s obviously your own decision to make.

miasswier’s ultimate glee ranking: no 24

24: I Do

Written by: Ian Brennan Directed by: Brad Falchuk

Overall Thoughts: This one is a tough one to rank, mostly because the parts that I love I love so goddamn much, but the parts that annoy me annoy me so goddamn much. It’s pretty high up on the list because, objectively, it’s a really strong episode. It’s smack-dab in the middle of the strongest set of episodes in season four (lasting from “Sadie Hawkins” to “Guilty Pleasures”), and has really good entertainment value, while also showing a fantastic portrayal of the difficulties of living with mental illness. I originally had it higher on the list than I do now, but I re-watched it again and ugh, seriously, the parts of this episode I dislike drag it down so goddamn much. Still, it’s really strong, and it has some of my favourite moments in all of Glee history.

What I Like:

Finn telling Rachel that not everything is about her. What I like most about this moment is that it’s true. It’s not just Finn telling Rachel that to ~conceal his true feelings or whatever. Him kissing Emma legitimately had nothing to do with Rachel.

Okay, this whole storyline annoys the fuck out of me, but the scene before Jake and Marley sing their duet is pretty funny. It’s too bad they didn’t give Ryder more of a chance to be funny, because Blake Jenner has fantastic comedic timing.

Kurt and Blaine making out in the backseat of that car. Obviously.

“This is just bros helping bros.” “I love it when you talk fratty.” These two are the biggest fucking dorks.

“Tell me that’s not Tina again!”

Becky as the angry flower girl, throwing her petals with so much fucking force.

Jake calling Ryder out on his racist assumption that Jake would steal, or that Marley would assume Jake was stealing. As far as I remember there’s been no indication that Jake has ever actually committed a crime? He’s just lippy with teachers and sleeps with tons of girls and thinks that makes him a badass, but he isn’t a thief.

Jake and Marley not having sex. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: nobody can convince me that Marley wasn’t asexual. Still, I remember hearing the spoilers that five couples would go into hotel rooms and that four of those would be having sex and instantly hoping that Jake and Marley would be the ones that didn’t. I mean, Jake talks a big game about “taking it slow” but they’ve only been dating for four episodes, so that’s, what, a month? Maybe two? I’m glad that Marley didn’t let herself be pressured by the romantic gestures and such.

Santana raising her arms above her head while she follows Quinn into the hotel room. She’s so excited for the sex she’s about to have.

Honestly, Santana and Quinn in general in this episode. Everything about it is perfect, other than Quinn instantly shooting down the possibility of bisexuality, but my absolute favourite exchange is when Quinn tells Santana that the only non-gross guys are Will (ew) and Al Roker and Santana goes “Al Roker is disgusting, by the way.”

Seriously, though. Santana and Quinn had sex. Twice. That is a canonical thing that happened. I think about it every day tbh. God bless Glee.

Brittany taking pictures of Sue as she walks down the aisle and whispering “you look so good.”

“Oh, look, it’s the glee kids.”

Kurt very obviously hiding his boner behind his jacket as he gets out of the car, and Blaine’s adorable “oh my god.”

“You do realize how trashy blasphemous this is, right?” “Oh, come on Mercedes, everybody hooks up at weddings.”

Kurt pulling Blaine into the hotel room by the fucking tie.

I really enjoy the entire montage of couples post-sex (or post-not-sex, in the case of Jake and Marley). Obviously the Klaine scene is my favourite, but even the Artie/Betty scene is pretty cute. Also, Finn and Rachel’s scene is really heartbreaking in hindsight, since that’s the last time we see them on-screen together (in the same location, at least), and it’s the last kiss Rachel ever gives Finn.

Honestly, although it does annoy me in the context of the episode and in the context of when it aired, in hindsight the whole “we are endgame” speech is pretty sad. Hearing Finn talk about how he and Rachel are going to end up together, no matter what, is like a knife to the heart. Like, wow. There’s so much stuff on this show that in hindsight is just gutting.

That being said, it’s hilarious when Finn gives that whole pseudo-deep metaphor about seeds and Rachel just responds with “are you telling me you want to be a gardener?”

“Will Schuester is a weepy man-child whose greatest joy in life is singing with children. And his best friend? Nineteen.”

“Well, don't say that to Will Schuester. He'll have you singing a stripped down acoustic version of I Will Survive in a choir room full of teenagers with meaningful looks on their faces.”

Rachel telling Finn the honest truth that Emma running off has literally nothing to do with him. I’m glad that we’re at the point in the show where Finn making every woman in his life’s drama about himself is getting nipped in the bud.

Blaine and Kurt flanking Tina in red and white. They look like the angel and devil on her shoulders. Also, they’re totally going to make out during Showgirls.

The portrayal of Emma’s downward spiral over this episode and the previous one is so fantastic. Because it’s real. Here is a woman getting ready for what is supposed to be the happiest day of her life, and she’s just dreading it. Her anxiety gets worse and worse, and that just makes her OCD flare up even more-so than usual, and the result we get in the scene leading into “I’m (Not) Getting Married Today” is so wonderfully acted by Jayma Mays. I can think of very few TV shows who accurately dealt with this downside of mental illness: not even being able to enjoy the things that are supposed to bring you joy. Emma wants more than anything to marry Will, but she just can’t do it. It’s so raw, and emotional, and I’m so glad that we got to watch her perspective and not just Will and Finn’s. It’s just… god, I love that whole scene and that whole story. It’s just so goddamn real.

What I Don’t Like:

Mercedes calling Kurt and Blaine her “arm gays”. No thanks.

Okay, yeah, in hindsight the Finchel stuff is really sad, and I did tear up at a few of their scenes, but for fuck’s sake. It’s season four and we’re still dealing with this bullshit? They don’t have that much screen time, but it feels like every one of their scenes is never ending. And just exhausting. Plus, one of those scenes takes place while Kurt and Blaine are singing and I’ll never forgive Glee for that. Never.

In a similar vein, Artie and Betty have way too much screen time considering she was a one-episode character, and they also have a scene during Klaine’s song. It’s almost worse than the Finchel scene because it involves Artie literally annoying a girl into dancing with him via insulting her. She said no, bud. Leave her alone.

Jake/Marley/Ryder is SO ANNOYING OH MY GOD. Of all the annoying heterosexual bullshit I’m forced to put up with in this episode, theirs annoys me the most. First of all, we’re supposed to be rooting for Jake and Marley, but Glee is clearly showing us that Jake is the worst. But then Ryder kisses Marley, who is dating his best friend, so guess who just got added to the list of “the worst”? Seriously , why were these two the only two options given for Marley? She would have been way better off dating Unique.

I know this is a stupid, nitpicky thing, but I hate when Ryder says “she’s just a sophomore” about Marley, because I’m 98% sure that he and Jake are also sophomores, but this makes it sound like they’re both these mature adults or at least seniors, which just ends up making it seem creepy that these two guys are trying to get with this girl who they both clearly see as innocent and inexperienced, and seem to like all the more because of those qualities.

Again, one of the few episodes where I could accept Will having a lot of scenes, and he’s barely in it. Why does Glee always shove Will down my throat when I don’t want him, but hold back on him when he should actually be there? This is his goddamn wedding and he just got stood up. At least show him going to the honeymoon sweet in the hotel alone or something.

Another nitpicky thing but Mercedes isn’t at the reception and that makes me sad >:(

Songs:

You’re All I Need to Get By: I like the scene that comes before this, but the actual performance is boring, mostly because I do not give a rats ass about Jake and Marley. Also, it’s weird that Marley has solo lines in this. I would understand her singing along to some of it, but why is she singing parts by herself? She didn’t know this performance was happening!! HOW DID THEY CO-ORDINATE!!!

Getting Married Today: An awesome performance and amazing vocals by Jayma Mays. I love all of this except for the weird, floating Will Schuester head that is horribly green-screened to hove over Emma running away.

Just Can’t Get Enough: I really, really like this song. The performance, however, frustrates me. You barely see Kurt and Blaine! There are two scenes interjected in the song of straight couples talking, and almost all of the shots during the song are of straight people dancing. WE GET IT FOX! You didn’t want too much gay on your TV, and this episode already had two boys making out, and the implication of them having sex, as well as two girls having sex. Can’t let the boys actually be seen singing together after all that. (Seriously, though, the cover itself is fantastic).

We’ve Got Tonite: Despite my frustration with Finchel in this episode (and always), I really adore this song. It’s the last time they sing together, but even before it was that I still loved it. It’s slow, but sweet, and has fantastic emotion behind it. Plus, we haven’t had Finchel duets shoved down our throat for quite a while now, so I can appreciate how nice they sound together all the more-so. I also love the sneak-attack group song approach they took. Having everyone sing one line and then Finn and Rachel close it off was really clever and makes for a cool song and a great performance.

Anything Could Happen: This is a fun, upbeat song, and it’s a fun, upbeat scene, but honestly, it feels out of place. We aren’t at a fun, upbeat place when this episode ends. Rachel thinks she’s pregnant. Will can’t find Emma. Finn still feels guilty even though Rachel told him explicitly that it wasn’t his fault. Marley feels weird about Ryder kissing her (even though it wasn’t her fault!). The only storyline that really had a happy ending was the Klaine/Tina one (technically Artie/Betty too, but since we literally never see her again…), so I don’t know why this is suddenly all upbeat and happy. It feels like a really odd note to end such an emotional episode on.

Final Thoughts: I’ve always held this episode close to my heart. There is so much that happens in this episode that is so important to me (mostly Quinntana sexy times, but a lot of it is the Emma stuff too). Yeah, some of it annoys me, and the stuff that annoys me really annoys me, but it doesn’t outweigh all the awesome parts of this episode. Just, overall really strong and well-crafted. A+ Glee!

*BURSTS DOWN DOOR* So a little birdie told me you like Batman. I want names of favorite characters, reasons why you like them, and favorite episodes/comics. GO, I WON'T HESITATE!!!!

y e s i will ABSOLUTELY tell you all my Fun Batman Opinions (specifically TAS because That’s The Best DCA Stuff imo) !! There’s gonna be a lot because I forgot how much I liked writing about Batman TAS

Top characters (in no order bc they’re all p good) (also whoops i put best eps in with some characters ayy)Mr Freeze: Sheerly cause of what Paul Dini did with his story in the TAS. I absolutely adore how they managed to turn Mr Freeze from a One Hit Joke to a real, indepth dude with a legitimate motive and a heartbreaking story. This ties into one of my fave episodes: Heart of Ice because it makes me cry. Every time I watch that episode that little bit at the end just makes me bawl. It’s such a beautiful episode and the muuusiicc.... h

Harley Quinn: she’s just??? amazing??? i love her??? she is adorable I’m sorry. I like how she’s written in the TAS because she can be that giggly cute girl BUT she can also ACTUALLY DEVISE A PLAN AND CARRY IT OUT!!!!! Like. Fave comic/episode with her is Mad Love (because of the whole ‘Harley pulls a plan off better and actually nearly nails the Bat) and also Harlequinaide because she even makes jokes about what people think about her, eg: “Joke’s on you, I’m not even a real blonde!” like oh my god h oney i love you? There are so many more reasons that she’s amazing too eg: the fact that she became a fan favourite character from her sheer existance in the animated series and the TAS comics. Like, she was immediately So Good that she’s one of the main dc villains now I find that just??? great??? also harley & ivy > harley & joker sorry i love both ships but i favour the least problematic and bad :’ )

Harvey Dent/Two Face: I used to crush on him when I was writing this huge paper on the DCAU when I was younger. I legit did. I just really like the emotional depth that’s put in Two Face (part 1 & 2). Like, in general, the emotive motive in this series is really good. Mostly though, the reason I like him so much is because of Almost Got ‘Im. And also the first Hugo Strange ep with “GET OUTTA MY FACE CLOWN!”“Which one?”and the actual look of “oh my fucking god you bitch” face that harv gives the joker ok :’)))

Baby Doll: Her episodes 1. Fucking Hurt me and 2. give me big feels cause I have horrendous babyface and its extremely frustrating to feel babied all the time just because of how i look :’)anyways I really do love her story, the similarities to child stars that were around at the time and the general messages it carries across, y’know, treat people with respect, celebrities are people too, don’t judge based on appearance etc. I just.... really like what they did with her. I like how her whole thing isn’t “IM EVIL CAUSE I WANT TO BE!” its “I’m evil because I’ve been fucked around since I was a kid, I’ve had my career fucked with because people don’t see me past my disability, I’m pissed off and now I want revenge in the form of an exploding cake filled with dynamite” 

Joker: Because of both how he’s written and also because Mark Hamill Is A Good. There’s nothing like, good about him. He’s terrible. But he also makes me laugh a lot but I think most of that comes from the voice work and the writing. He’s a stinky clown but he’s like, written so well that he’s especially stinky but also you still can’t help but.... kinda like him??? 

Favourite Episodes:

Mad Love: It was such a faithful adaptation of the comic. Like, it legitimately just felt like someone had put the comic on screen and just dubbed it or something. It’s just................ good episode :’ ) one thing I wasn’t super into tho was the redesigns for Batman And Robin like oof ow the edges are sharp

Feat of Clay p2: I’m a huge animation nerd so the constant turning from one role to another while Clayface is freaking the fuck out was just absolutely hypnotic to watch. The animation was so smooth and so pretty I just couldn’t stop myself watching it like 10 times over again.

Baby Doll: see above :’ ) also Alan Young. 

Almost Got ‘Im: The premise of all the villains playing poker together was amazing. Whoever just thought “hey, lets just have like, 5 bad guys shoot the shit and play poker together and see what happens” needs like $100. The character interaction was hilarious, with the call backs to previous episodes like with Ivy poisoning Harvey. 

Trial: Same thing about villains interacting but moreso on the moral compass questioning. the whole “who is the real villain” thing especially. The viewpoint of Batman being the cause of these villains existing being brought into light is something that’s a legitimate question that whole episode but the justification Bats gives with the whole “You would have been bad in other ways if I wasn’t around” is actually a really good point to observe and it... just makes me like that ep ykno

with the comics it’s the usual, Mad Love, Killing Joke. I feel bad because I’ve consumed more animated media because I get overwhelmed by large amounts of text sometimes :’’’ )))

tbh theres probably waaaaaay more to this list but i was gonna make a point of rewatching all of TAS anyways !!

Top 5 Games Of The Year #4

Yakuza 0 is a pretty special game both individually and as a part of its franchise. It’s the first time Yakuza has taken a step backwards chronologically, in order to better explore already established characters and what led them to the events of the first game. It gets a lot of praise already and I’m just here to heap a little more onto the pile because it well deserves it. Although the series at this point is no stranger to having multiple protagonists and Majima has technically been playable before the special feeling Yakuza 0 elicits by having two protagonists wasn’t really lost for it. Compared to the four in Yakuza 4, or the frankly over padded five protagonists in Yakuza 5, taking a step down to just two and placing an almost equal emphasis on each really does the game’s narrative and pacing wonders. Yakuza 0′s story is really good it is an excellent crime drama and among the best main plots the series has to offer. While some might argue other entries, usually 2 or 4, can stand up alongside it I feel 0′s has an edge in some areas. Largely in terms of pace, ambition, and intrigue. For instance, 2 doesn’t really mess around with plot twists, the entire game basically waves a giant flag over Ryuji saying he’s the final boss and the whole plot exists basically just to get to his and Kiryu’s legendary fight. And that’s fine, it doesn’t try to be more than it needs to be and that’s okay. 4 meanwhile has more intrigue and some good twists in there but its pace is much poorer in my opinion. Your mileage may vary on the bullets plot twist, too. 0 has some legitimate plot twists and it does a great job getting players engaged and interested in what’s going to happen next. To get back to 0 though, it doesn’t sacrifice characterization to achieve the quality of its plot either, far from it. It’s the first time we’ve seen a young, hot blooded, and frankly really stupid Kiryu. Kiryu’s never a smart guy but getting to see how he handles situations and behaves before 10 years in prison and subsequent stories smooth his edges and temper his personality is really a treat for fans of the character and newcomers alike. He’s fun, relatable, serious when he needs to be, and most importantly he’s still perfectly recognizable as Kiryu. He is still absolutely that amazing protagonist that you know and love, he’s just young, dumb, and full of.....well you know. On the other hand Majima is almost unrecognizable in this game, being calm, well dressed, a charismatic and professional showman, dissuading others from fighting, all while being openly depressed to boot. This take on Majima still feels fitting because the way he phrases himself is familiar, his gut reactions feel right for the characters, and ultimately this game contextualizes not just his transformation into the Mad Dog of Shimano fans know him as later but many of his actions through the rest of the series. Just ignore how his story here and how he’s written in Yakuza 5 violently contradict one another. We can all just pretend Y5′s Majima writing isn’t canon. The strength of characterization extends to the game’s side characters too, including ones who alongside Majima and Kiryu return from the main series. Nishiki, Kashiwagi, the Lieutenants, Tachibana, Lee, and more are all memorable and great characters. Just, uhh, don’t expect many women in the main plot is all. I don’t want to talk too in depth about the game’s story so as to avoid spoiling anything but it really is a treat. The script takes advantage of player’s expectations in a meta sense, that ultimately this will be Kiryu’s game because, well, Yakuza 4 and 5 were Kiryu’s games in spite of the other protagonists. Those guys all got good, moving stories too and they are all well worth experiencing and having around but ultimately Kiryu is still the most important guy on the block. Not so, here, as by the halfway point of the game players might notice that Majima’s ‘half’ of the game, his half of the game’s chapters, are quite a bit longer than Kiryu’s. Majima has a lot more legwork to do in the story because it is his story, and while Kiryu gets the true final boss fight and is very important to the events at hand as well it’s really Majima who’s the star here. This game is an excuse to explore his character and it does not beat around the bush on that intention. If you are a fan of this franchise you really do have to experience this story. All too often prequel games just end up softening or weakening the existing narratives they’re trying to pay homage to or trying to strengthen but Yakuza 0 expertly dodges that bullet by never missing a beat in terms of quality relative to standard Yakuza entires. My only real issue with the story, honestly, is that Makoto is about as much of a McGuffin as she is a person. The game does take time to develop her both directly and indirectly but ultimately she spends about as much time just being a plot device to be ferried around by one man or another as she does getting to talk and do things.  The gameplay is very refined compared to other games in the seires, I would argue it’s tighter and more fun than Yakuza 6′s, even, if only due to the sheer variety of Heat Actions (effectively super moves; ranging from the silly to the bombastic to the brutal to a handful that made me shout ‘HOLY SHIT HE DIDN’T DESERVE THAT!!!’ at my TV) present in 0. If you like beat ‘em ups you’ll like Yakuza’s playstyle; each character gets 4 fighting styles earning three through the story and a fourth through side content. The fourth fighting style for each one is essentially a bonus, letting them fight in their ‘iconic’ styles, Dragon and Mad Dog respectively. To be honest they’re both underwhelming, Mad Dog is maybe Majima’s weakest fighting style and Dragon, while strong, requires a lot more heat than what it naturally builds to stay competent. The fighting styles are still fun though, they add plenty of new and unique options to each character to justify getting them, they’re just not going to win you the game for free or anything. Of the character’s main fighting styles the only real issue I have is the disparity in strength between them, both internally and between each other. No mincing words here, Majima is obscenely overpowered compared to Kiryu. Breaker Style annihilates every challenge in the game with next to no effort besides Mr. Shakedown fights, which aren’t really fun anyway. That said Slugger easily bashes in Mr. Shakedown and even Jo Amon. Majima will breeze through all of his content even on higher difficulties. Comparatively Kiryu can have a pretty rough time in some fights. This is due in part by his fighting styles being really well balanced internally, they’re all useful and thus the player may actually feel like swapping between them mid battle or between encounters. Kiryu not really having an overwhelming option generally means he can be very expressive, my fiancé and I played him very differently for instance on our runs. Whether you most enjoy his fast, invulnerability frame heavy, dash cancelling Rush style which takes a very high amount of investment to become good but I would argue is maybe his best style once you get it there, his brutish item swinging, semi-grappler Beast style which absolutely decimates indoors fights, or the more well rounded, heat action heavy Brawler Kiryu’s got something for everyone. Each of his styles also get a great variety of unique heat actions, all three to environmental cues, and Beast and Brawler to equip-able and overworld items. While Majima’s fighting style are also expressive and a ton of fun to use they just feel too safe and too easy compared to Kiryu. He gets absolutely stellar results and gets them quickly for extremely little effort in the ridiculously fast, low profile attacks of Breaker. Not to say Breaker isn’t fun, because it is, breakdancing to beat people up is hilarious and fun and its heat actions are flavorful to boot, it’s just really overpowered is all. After some investment his Ballerina With A Baseball Bat fighting style, Slugger, also becomes nigh impossible to challenge for the AI thanks to it losing its primary weakness of the bat bouncing off of walls it hits after you put only moderate investment into it. While the least varied of Majima’s styles in terms of heat actions, Slugger is great fun if you ever wanted a proper weapon based fighting style in Yakuza. It feels like what Shinada should have played like. Majima’s starting style, Thug, is a fun grappling and street brawling style that requires a lot of precision to use well and is very well suited to one on one fights should the player be so inclined to not opt for his better options. It makes use of baroque kicks, eye pokes, strangles, and back turns. It’s also Majima’s only style that can make use of non-baseball bat items for heat actions as well as most of his environmental heat actions, and Majima has some GREAT heat actions under these conditions, helping Thug keep a niche compared to the other styles. Honestly, if you like Tekken you’ll probably like Thug. These great fighting styles would be pointless if the game didn’t have fun enemies and situations to pit you against and thankfully it does. Its ‘dungeons’ are a lot of fun and some of the boss fights really stand out. Thanks to the sheer myriad of context based Heat Actions even just fighting the random mooks in the street stays fun for dozens of hours as you experiment to see how you can fuck up some chumps today. It’s deeply gratifying and a lot of fun. While the optional Mr. Shakedown fights are a chore, they are all optional besides the first one so there’s no real reason to bother with them unless you’re doing a 100% substory completion run or REALLY need to grind money in a game where money is already free. Some of the boss fights are a bit mediocre, too, but overall they’re good fun. I do think Yakuza 0 is at its strongest though when it’s making the player fight room after room of enemies, dozens at a time, and just letting them feel like an absolute champion while doing so, really letting them revel in just how strong and cool Majima and Kiryu are. Yakuza 0′s side content is both one of its greatest strengths and in my opinion an area where it shows the most weakness. While Pocket Circuit, Karaoke, Cabaret Club, and the Sub-Stories are absolutely excellent and I truly cannot stress enough how fun they are the game also has a myriad of seemingly half baked minigames based off of real life activities for you to do, a lot of which have unnecessary RNG. Even Bowling has RNG...BOWLING, come on! The Pool, Darts, Bowling, Catfight Club, and other such minigames feel very rushed in execution and for all but the last of those feel like poor simulations compared to other games I have played. Catfight Club is just a really, really, shameless and sexist ‘Watch almost naked women ‘’’’wrestle’’’’’. Also, opposite Majima’s deeply flavorful, engaging, well written, and fun club management minigame Club Sunshine, the aforementioned cabaret club, Kiryu gets Real Estate Royale. Which is about as fun as you think. It’s literally standing around waiting for money to grind for you and then going out and investing it into properties. While the storyline attached to it is decent enough and has some good moments for Kiryu the minigame itself is just dreadful and grossly slow paced. Which is funny to say, because I think it takes less time to complete than Cabaret Club, but it feels like A Lot Longer because it just isn’t fun. There’s the Telephone Club, which uhhh, you can have Kiryu do to get laid. It’s funny in a tongue in cheek way but it’s also not my cup of tea besides laughing at Kiryu’s great dialogue and body language during the interactions. Basically, play Karaoke to hear Kiryu’s beautiful singing voice and also THE ONLY GAME IN THE SERIES WHERE MAJIMA’S SINGING ISN’T JUST AWFUL SCREECHING! 24 Hour Cinderella is a gift to the world and you need to play it. Cabaret Club is also where the vast majority of this game’s female characters exist, as hostesses. While the game could take this opportunity to be sexist (and one could argue it is, for sure) the writing present in Cabaret Club for the platinum hostesses and their story lines is just as good as anything else from the game. They’re worth talking to, learning about, and seeing their development. In all honesty they can almost fittingly serve as a nice break from the game’s intense story, giving the player a breather with some whole and comedic interactions. The Sub-Stories which make up this game’s version of side quests (because yes, this is a Beat ‘Em Up Japanese Crime Drama RPG) are also basically all amazing. The writing is heartfelt, funny, and just really good. They all have strong opening hooks without forcing the player to immediately get involved and despite being 100 of them they’re basically all really memorable. This is also where the game pays Kiryu back a bit for his lost story content relative to Majima, giving him 60 of the 100 sub stories. They’re all great ways to get to see more aspects of these characters and the citizens of Kamurocho, please give a bunch of them a try if you play this game. I also briefly want to talk about the settings of the game, Kamurocho and Sotenbori. They’re literally just the real life Japanese districts, Kabukicho and Dotenbori by SLIGHLY different names. If you play this game enough you’ll know some real life actual locations in actual real life Japan like you’ve been there. You’ll be able to navigate at least a few square blocks of Japan without a map, it’s amazing, and it’s really something special compared to other games. Also, I’m not exaggerating, the overworld(s) of this game are only a few square blocks large but the game plays that to its advantage. Navigating from one side to another of either one takes a minute or two at most and the streets are always PACKED with content. It’s impossible to wander around playing naturally without falling ass backwards into a dozen or more of the game’s sidestories and inevitably getting sucked into playing a few of them and seeing how good they are. I love this game’s map, it’s so brilliant in its design by simply being true to a real life location. Yakuza 0 also sports stellar sound design. The sound effects are BEEFY, hitting things feels amazing and nothing sounds out of place or off beat. The bombastic, over the top hit sounds really sell Majima and Kiryu’s overwhelming power and it just makes every fight satisfying. The soundtrack similarly is good, and while much of the soundtrack isn’t what I would call listening music, the Karaoke selections, specifically Bake Mitai, sure are. I’m not really the kind of guy who can tell you why the sound design is good, it just is, trust me.

All in all, Yakuza 0 is a stellar game and is exemplary of both what a modern beat ‘em up AND a modern RPG should strive to be like. It is a masterpiece in its own right and I’m glad that its success in the western market has secured this unique, beautiful series a future. Please play Yakuza 0, it’s regularly on sale on both PS4 and Steam and it deserves your attention. If you’re ever alone on a Friday night, just remember these Yakuza, and you’ll have a great time.

The Book Ramblings of August

In place of book reviews, I will be writing these ‘book ramblings’. A lot of the texts I’ve been reading (or plan to read) in recent times are well-known classics, meaning I can’t really write book reviews as I’m used to. I’m reading books that either have already been read by everyone else (and so any attempt to give novel or insightful criticisms would be a tad pointless), or are so convoluted and odd that they defy being analysed as I would do a simpler text. These ramblings are pretty unorganised and hardly anything revolutionary, but I felt the need to write something review-related this year. I’ll upload a rambling compiling all my read books on a monthly basis.

A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole An American friend recommended me this (or I mean technically he’s Russian but I’m not going to get into that because it’s not important to this ramble), citing it as a legitimately hilarious book, an idea that my cynical mind was fully willing to haughtily scoff at. I opted to read it not only because of the really nice Penguin Clothbound edition, but because, from what I’d heard, it was a picaresque narrative set in a colourful New Orleans setting with plenty of memorable characters, and if I’m going to read any American literature, this seemed like a safe bet.  As it turns out, the fact that this story is a picaresque narrative isn’t what first stood out to me as this book’s main strength; this is very much a story defined by its characters, to the extent that the few short bits of secondary reading on this text write pretty much solely on Toole’s achievements in terms of the characters that he’s created. Ignatius J Reilly and Myrna Minkoff are honestly two of my favourite characters in any book, not because they’re necessarily likeable (because they really aren’t) but because they’re interesting and humorous and diametrically opposed in a fascinating way. These two are certainly the standout characters; the majority of the other characters are noteworthy, but perhaps only really as examples of stereotypical character moulds (niche and relevant only to the setting as said stereotypes may be). Much of the comedy in the text is based on evoking laughter at figures who you’d feel bad for laughing at, which is all good fun when such characters are such blustering caricatures that one cannot help but laugh at them, but in other cases it doesn’t really make for enjoyable reading. Ignatius’ mother, for instance, is such a pathetic and pitiful character in her own scenes that any intended comedy at her expense just seems a tad cruel. There is a recurrent theme in the text of characters who are seemingly only introduced for a very small scene in a very minor role are then roped into the overall grand story, and their exploits are narrated on for seemingly long after they have had any relevance to Ignatius, the book’s main driving force. This is perhaps ameliorated when said extra side stories follow characters who are interesting in their own rights; Jones, for instance, is a bloody hilarious character, even when absolutely bugger all is going on in his own story until Ignatius enters the fray again. The setting is very colourful, and made yet more absurd with its cast of caricatures and odd preponderance for utilising wacky costumes for comedic effect, and this absurdity perfectly reflects the story, a story that goes significantly more off the rails than I was anticipating. There are twists and turns and cases of mistaken identity and characters running into each other at hilariously inopportune moments, and whilst the plot takes a while to set all the pieces in motion, when it does it’s a fucking joy to read. I didn’t know how a picaresque narrative could properly end when it is comprised entirely of wacky self-enclosed encounters which all have their defined individual beginnings and endings, but this book’s ending is surprisingly satisfying, as well as being in keeping with the medieval wheel of fortune structure that is constantly brought up in Ignatius’ monologuing. This text is apparently now on some American school curriculums, which certainly adds up to me because, when reading it, I was put in mind of the texts that I looked at for GCSE, in that the text is defined by its few blatantly obvious central themes that don’t require much extrapolation, and subsequently result in there not being much in the way of innovative or novel secondary reading pieces on the text. Perhaps this tidbit of information can be extended to explain my rather petty and subjective complaints about the novel; I did this sort of shit with the texts I had to read for GCSE too. I’m glad that I read this out of choice as opposed to being forced to learn about, because it’s far better for enjoyment than for education in my opinion.

I didn’t actually read any more novels this month, so I made up for it by reading an absolute fuck tonne of short stories.

From Shadows of Carcosa: Tales of Cosmic Horror: ‘The Squaw’ (Bram Stoker) - a short and well-written little piece with an ending that was both satisfying and metal as fuck ‘Moxon’s Master’, ’That Damned Thing’ and ‘An Inhabitant of Carcosa’ (Ambrose Bierce)  - very well-written and compelling pieces, though varying in how memorable they are (my favourite probably being ’That Damned Thing’, because it seems less like a snippet of a wider story and more like a full pieced-together narrative) ‘The White People’ (Arthur Machen) - astounding writing both in its mind-bending discourse on the meaning of evil and its ability to uniquely convey the terrifying unknowableness of the cosmic horror genre with the narrative voice of a child, though I fail to see the connection between the two ‘The Willows’ (Algernon Blackwood) - excellent at imbuing a novel location with a unique sense of dread, though the past tense narration perhaps jumps the gun somewhat when it comes to revealing the fates of our characters (and perhaps the grand villainous entities from another dimension seem a tad incongruous in this rather small setting) ‘Seaton’s Aunt’ (Walter de la Mare) - very compelling writing that turns out to not be about much at all; a fantastic depiction of childhood fear that doesn’t really translate as well when the story’s characters reach adulthood ‘The Colour Out Of Space’ (HP Lovecraft) - a slow build-up of imaginative and fucked-up strangeness in a cool rural setting, really capturing the essence of the cosmic horror with a truly unknowable and unique threat

Miscellaneous short stories: ‘The Dualists’ (Bram Stoker) - certainly well-written but any thoughts that I have on it are completely overshadowed by the fact that this is among the most fucked-up short stories I’ve ever read - it goes beyond cheery Grand Guignol fun times entertainment and is instead just really fucked and unsatisfying ‘A Dream of Red Hands’ (Bram Stoker) - well-written and possesses a pleasant enough ending, but it was more Christian-centric than I expected and less gratuitously bloody for a story with such an evocative title ‘An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge’ (Ambrose Bierce) - absolutely fantastic from its exciting action sequence to its phenomenal ending, with American history nonsense just vague enough so as to be accessible ‘The System of Doctor Tarr and Professor Fether’ (Edgar Allan Poe) - a short and darkly funny story with an absolutely fantastic chaotic dinner scene ‘Axolotl’ (Julio Cortazar) - delicately written and weirdly thought-provoking even though it’s seemingly not really about anything at all ‘Mr Miao/The Tiger Guest’ (Pu Songling) - a striking and dramatic story about social decorum and crazy animal curses, which was basically what I expected from my limited frame of reference to Chinese fiction (and had more in common with The Tiger Who Came to Tea than I would have reasonably expected)

How I Overcame Reader’s Block (And So Can You!)

As a kid, I adored reading.  Okay, more specifically, I enjoyed reading about dragons, but that’s not the issue here.  

It frequently coincided with my equally as intense love of climbing trees, and some of my fondest memories involve being perched in a small tree and reading some hopelessly goofy, dragon-related literature while my mom and toddler siblings used the playground equipment.  If no climbable trees were available, I’d settle for reading under one and drinking a thermos of chocolate milk while they ran around in the park. 

As I got older, my tastes got a little more eclectic as I encountered Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, Anne Shirley, the residents of Narnia and Middle Earth, respectively, and much to my mother’s horror, Stephen King, but my passion remained more or less the same.    

Bottom line is, I loved reading.  It was my paramount joy, my primary source of entertainment, and I didn’t think that would ever change.

So imagine my shock when, around my sophomore year of college at the age of seventeen, it occurred to me that I hadn’t really read for pleasure since I discovered the Hunger Games a year or two prior.  Moreover, and equally as horrifically, when I tried to read I found I couldn’t focus;  regardless of the quality of the story and how much I wanted to read it, the investment was gone.

Whether this was due to my first stint with organized education (prior to college, I was homeschooled) or the fact that I’d grown accustomed to the bite-sized chunks of candy-flavored, insubstantial information served up by the internet, the sad and simple fact was that I had fallen out of love with reading, and it looked like it was going to stay that way forever.   

Well, flash forward two-point-five years to Present-Day Brooksie, and since school got out in early May, I’ve read Chuck Palahniuk’s Make Something Up: Stories You Can’t Unread, Ruth Ware’s In a Dark, Dark Wood, Emma Straub’s The Vacationers, Neil Gaiman’s The Graveyard Book, and Celeste Ng’s Everything I Never Told You.  Despite the disappointing lack of dragons, I loved all of them.    

I drink books like nectar again, if you’ll pardon the floral language, and everything from the quality of my writing to the quality of my life has improved as a result of it.  

So how did I fall back in love with reading?  Well, I’ve spent a lot of time pontificating on this, and as far as I can tell, it can be narrowed down to three factors:

1.  Reading every day.

It started with lunch.  Every day, when I’d sit down at my university cafe, I used to get out my laptop and watch YouTube or whatnot while I ate my sandwich -- a cool idea in theory, but really sort of gross whenever I rubbed my greasy fingers on the mouse and keyboard. 

When I made a conscious decision to read more, I began taking out my book and reading during the lunch period instead.  It didn’t come naturally at first -- I was easily distracted and kept zoning out -- but I ultimately found it very pleasant, especially when I listened to some classical music in the background as well (nice for atmosphere, and for drowning out noise and distractions.)  

I kept doing it.  

When that summer rolled around, I rediscovered an amazing little outdoor cafe by the harbor.  It had no wifi, which for my purposes, was absolutely perfect.

I went there to read Good Omens and eat home baked lemon squares, pie, and banana bread, listening to international tourists speak in other languages, and watch the boats go by.  It was a beautiful environment, and that (coupled with the fact that Good Omens is just really fucking awesome) made it easier than ever for me to want to stay longer and become more engrossed in what I was reading.

Afterwards, I’d take out my notebook and work on my own stories and journal.  Overall, I’d say that summer was one of the most intellectually productive I’ve had.  

Once school started again, it got a little harder to read every day, but by then my love of reading had pretty much caught:  it had become an intellectual drug for me again, a source of comfort, pleasure, and inspiration.  Also, it was another viable excuse to procrastinate on my academic responsibilities, which was always welcome.  So I kept reading.  It was still a relatively slow process, as I had to work around my already busy schedule, but the more I read the more adept I became at drinking in the information in hungry, satisfying gulps (a bit more suggestive than I’d initially intended that metaphor to be, but I’m going to go with it.)

But this isn’t to say that there were no bumps in the road back to bibliophilia.  There was another factor that I had to grasp before I reached the point where I could unabashedly adore reading once again.

Which is: 

2.  Reading what excites me.

No, I’m not speaking sexually, you pervert.  I’m talking about books I actually want to read.  

When I first started trying to get back into literature, I started trying to read the classics exclusively, like Around the World in Eighty Days and Little Women.  Let me be clear, these books are amazing (excluding the jarring amounts of racism and endorsements of British colonialism in the former) but after semesters of reading similar works for my literature seminars, they just felt a little like...academia.  

In fact, the only reason I was insistent on reading classics exclusively, I now realize, was because I was a pretentious, pseudo intellectual little shit back in those days with a horrible case of impostor syndrome.  What I needed to re-learn was what dragon-loving, Ten-Year-Old Brooksie long since already knew: the best way to enjoy reading is to read what you actually enjoy.

It was a lesson I slowly but surely remastered, and it took me a while to realize that modern literature is teaming with smart, enriching reads, like Life of Pi, American Gods, Where’d You Go Bernadette, The Twelve Tribes of Hattie, The Help, Everything I Never Told You, and countless others.  

Moreover, these were books I didn’t have to force myself to read;  they were books I found myself reading at four AM because I didn’t want to stop.  

I’ve also discovered classics that I can eat up in a matter of days, like A Tree Grows in Brooklyn (Which absolutely everyone should read, by the way:  Francie Nolan is a feminist icon, and way, way ahead of her time, not to mention it’s fucking hilarious and will make you cry like a little bitch), Jane Eyre, and basically anything written by Jane Austen.  I love these books for their sharp wit, applicable and timeless life observations, and striking lack of the pretentiousness that I’d come to associate with a lot of classic literature.

This summer, I my reading list includes Vonnegut’s Slaughterhouse 5, Douglas Adams’ The Restaurant at the End of the Universe, Chuck Palahniuk’s Fight Club, Louis Sachar’s Holes, Anthony Doerr’s All the Light We Cannot See, and Neil Gaiman’s Anansi Boys.  I’m looking forward to reading each and every one of them. 

Ultimately, the point I’m trying to make here is that there’s no joy to be found in pretentiousness:  don’t read to prove yourself as an intellectual.  Read to enrich your soul, read what you legitimately enjoy, and read what inspires you.  

Which brings me to my next and final point...   

3.  Reading what inspires me.

This one might be true specifically for my fellow authors, but since I know a large portion of my followers are fellow authors, I think it’s applicable here.  

Ever since I was an infinitesimally small child, I’ve wanted to write stories.  When I was fourteen I wrote a hopelessly angsty YA novel about a half-dragon girl named Freedom and her misadventures with an ambiguously lesbian vampire and werewolf duo, a seductive and ambiguously bisexual elf (it was a time of self discovery for me), and a talking lion.  When I was eleven, I wrote a middle grade novel about a little boy who befriends a dragon.  When I was four, I wrote *ahem!* drew wordless stories about a winged wolf-creature named Starlight and his (in retrospect, overtly gory) battles with monsters.

It was bizarre, cringey, and I’m not gonna lie, pretty fucking awesome.  

Around the time I started college at around sixteen, I’d just decided I wanted to start writing again.  I had lots of ideas, and I remember in detail getting yelled at by my manager for scribbling in my notebook behind the counter instead of dutifully smiling at customers the way I was supposed to.  

But my writing was...well, to put it bluntly, it was really, really bad.  It only began to improve when I resolved to write every day.  It noticeably and drastically began to improve when I began to read works that I found creatively inspiring. 

While I was revising my manuscript, I read a lot of Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett, both masters of the kind of urban fantasy I was attempting to write,  and spent a lot of time figuring out what I loved most about their writing and how to best apply it.  This was also around the time I began reading Douglas Adams, which was, let me tell you, a magical experience.  It involved a lot of delighted gasping on my end and thinking you’re allowed to do that?

It really showed me what the barriers were for creative writing, or in this case, total lack thereof.

I think I owe these writers a lot for helping me to create several novel-length manuscripts I’m incredibly proud of, and one that I’m currently preparing to get published.

So in closing, for anyone suffering from reader’s block, feel free to try my approach:  read every day, read what you love and not to stoke your ego, and for my writer peeps, read what inspires you.

Either way, my books and I are enjoying a passionate long-term relationship, and every day I find myself loving them more.

one-soul-two-brothers’ ultimate fic recs: wincest edition (part III)

Wincest fics are my (other) absolute faves to read First time fics are the best (but not imperative) I like them to keep some semblance of canon A fic doesn’t have to have sex to be good (but it doesn’t hurt) They have all been thoroughly vetted (aka I’ve either read them all at least twice or will definitely be reading them again) And the most important: happy endings are a requirement

ENJOY!

best LATE-SEASON FIRST-TIME

title: The Exodus rating: explicit word count: 14k relationship: first time summary: So. Dean left with Cas over a week ago on some sort of recon mission, and yeah, Sam has been trying to bury himself in research, but he's just not coping all that well with the long-term separation. He wakes up early one morning, expecting the day to be like all the rest: brother-less. Oh, except, it's even worse than all the rest, because he's completely and totally alone on his brother-less thirty-fourth birthday. His bleak outlook quickly changes with an unexpected phone call, and he has to admit that maybe someone, somewhere answered his embarrassingly needy birthday wish, despite his lack of candles to blow out. excerpt: “Yeah,” Sam breathes, trying to convince himself he’s not dreaming. It’s just-- Dean is only sweet like this, open like this in Sam’s best dreams, so… how on earth could this be real? “I missed you,” Sam adds, breathing it shyly into the air between them, watching how the words affect his brother.

title: O Brother, Where Art Thou? rating: explicit word count: 6600 relationship: first time summary: Over the last fifteen years, Sam Winchester had walked away from his brother more times than he cared to count. This time, Sam couldn’t come up with a legitimate excuse. At least, not one that was appropriate to tell his brother. He knew that, as much as him leaving would hurt Dean, staying here would lead Sam to making choices that could hurt Dean so much more. Could push Dean away permanently. Because Sam Winchester was in love with his brother, and he couldn't hide it any longer. anna’s notes: Shameless self-promo.

title: The Claiming rating: explicit word count: 6900 relationship: first time summary: At age 32, Sam Winchester presents as an Omega. No one is more surprised than Dean, the Alpha who's been pining over his little brother all his life. Canon divergence after scene with Piper in 11x04, "Baby." anna’s notes: Look...I think I’ve read this like five times (at least) since I discovered it (like, a month ago). I know, it’s ridiculous, but it’s just SO GOOD. And yes, it’s an a/b/o fic, but if you’ve never read one or don’t really like them, I still think you should check this out. There are absolutely no dom/sub or non-con components that are often in a lot of other a/b/o fics. And IT’S LATE SEASON FIRST TIME WINCEST, OKAY? THE BEST KIND OF WINCEST. I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH.

title: The King and The Lionheart rating: explicit word count: 53k relationship: first time summary: After the disastrous but effective removal of the Mark, facing a life without allies or a reason to keep hunting, Sam and Dean Winchester leave their old life behind them in flames. They re-emerge from the ashes as Sam and Dean Wesson, residents of Misty Luna, Maine-- a town with a personality all its own. As they settle into civilian life, they gain careers, a home, good friendships and the kind of fulfillment they never thought possible. But with nothing left to fight, the underbelly of their particular kind of love is thrown into sharp relief, especially considering the whole town thinks they’re married, anyway. After dancing around their feelings for the past twenty years, Sam and Dean find a peace they never knew existed, and through it all, they find each other again. And maybe, just maybe, forever. Curtain!fic. Canon divergence after 10x21, “Dark Dynasty.” anna’s notes: THIS IS SO FUCKING GOOD.

best PLOT WHAT PLOT

title: Coupons rating: explicit word count: 5730 relationship: established summary: This could, quite possibly, go down as the most ridiculous thing he's ever done. He feels all of ten years old again, in a grade school where he doesn’t know anyone, creating a coupon book for Mother's Day that he plans to give to Dean. Only this time, he's 29 and his brother's turning 34, and the coupons aren't for chores around the house. anna’s notes: I mean...there’s a little plot. And plenty of fluff. It’s so good.

best MPREG

title: Not A Curse After All rating: explicit word count: 23k relationship: established summary: Dean didn't understand how his life always seemed to take the oddest turns. Another case with a witch and it was official, he was dying, not just dying, but a slow torturous decent into his worst fears before he went. He was eating like a teenage girl on a date, sleeping like a middle aged man in a mid-life crises and he hadn't wanted sex in....shit he didn't even know how long.

title: It Only Takes One Oops... rating: mature word count: 20k relationship: established summary: Someone gets pregnant. excerpt: “How, I mean, when… fuck,” Dean mumbled, his speaking ability currently matching his thought process.

“You’ve got the ‘how’ down perfectly,” Sam said as he sank down on the bed next to his brother. “The when? Oh, cast your brain–your upstairs brain–back about six weeks to that weekend at the Grand Canyon. The night with the full moon, the back of the Impala, NO condoms, the ‘come on Sammy, just this once, what can one time hurt, it’ll be fine, please Sammy, please.’”

“I didn’t beg--”

“You sure as hell didn’t use a condom! And, yes, you begged.”

title: Settling Up, Settling In rating: explicit word count: 38k relationship: established summary: Dean's been running himself ragged keeping Sam from scratching at the Wall Death put up in his little brother's head, and things are not okay between the brothers because Sam won't let Dean anywhere near him, and the only thing Dean really wants now? To retire. Because it's the only way to keep Sam safe. But a routine salt and burn leads to a cursed object that causes Sam to go into a sexual frenzy and get Dean pregnant, which is okay with Dean because that seems like the perfect ticket out. Until the Hell in Sam's head starts to spill over and he freaks out when Dean tells him about the baby.

best CRACK

title: SAMpala rating: explicit word count: 12k relationship: first time summary: Sam wishes he was the damned Impala, at least he might get some Dean love that way. anna’s notes: This is both hilarious and sweet at the same time.

best SEASON 12 CODA (episodes 12-20)

title: 12x13 summary: When Mary tells Sam and Dean that she's been working with the British Men of Letters, neither of the boys takes the news well. anna’s notes: Shameless self-promo.

title: Coda to 12x13 excerpt: He tries. He tries. He watches Dean scowl every time they see their mother and he works, honestly works to try and smooth things over, talks to Dean and talks to Mom and tries to help them see the other point of view. And if he catches Dean texting surreptitiously, later, he’s pleased about it. It’s good, right? That was the point, and there’s no reason she should message them both.

title: Dragged Up (12x17) summary: Sam's still so unsure of what he and Dean have. Drinking one night with Dean and Mick, Sam's thoughts spiral down into a deep pit of despair.

title: Through These Walls (12x18) summary: When Ketch put a bug in the bunker, he was looking for usable intel. What he got? Well, that is something else entirely.

title: You’ve Got Mail (12x18) summary: Sam's been getting an awful lot of emails from his brother lately... anna’s notes: Fluff and schmoop and a first kiss!

title: But We Can’t Punch Ourselves Awake (12x19) summary: Sam is sure this, too, will be forgiven. excerpt: Sam isn't like his brother. Dean forgives and forgets once you're back in his good graces. Sure, he's ruthless and can hold a grudge like no other but once you've proved yourself? He forgets it all. Sam is living proof of that. Still alive after all those years after Dean had planned on killing him. Sure, they'd made up after that but there are things in Sam's mind that he won't ever be rid of. It's evident even more by Dean's constant forgiving of Castiel.

title: Coda: The Future (12x19) excerpt: “I know what you’re gonna say, Sammy, but no. Not this time. He’s messed with my car, the Colt and my baby brother on the same fucking day. You are not making any more excuses for him. We’re done with him, you hear me? We’re done.” Dean pushes Sam’s hair out of his eyes. “You doin’ OK? Can you stand?”

title: Untitled 12.20 coda excerpt: Max won’t tell her anything. Bad witch is all he’ll say. Bought her power from a demon, used it against Mom, used it to make Mom turn on you. He won’t explain why he burned Mom without her. Won’t explain how she was healed, why there isn’t a bloody gash in her abdomen. Natural magic. Don’t worry. You’re fine. Everything’s gonna be fine. anna’s notes: This isn’t actually wincest, but it was too good not to add to this list.

title: Coda: Twigs and Twine and Tasha Banes (12x20) summary: Written mostly because I'm so worried that Sam wouldn't wake up at the end of 12.20. *chews nails*

          For all my other ultimate fic recs (j2 non-au, j2 au, and wincest), go here.

Watched in 2019

Big Little Lies (Season 1): This is such a solid cast and story, albeit predictable. I loved it as a mini-series and do not understand why it needs a second season; but I’ll be watching regardless. 

Taylor Swift Reputation Stadium Tour (2018): IIIIIIIIIII don’t think this setting is the best for Taylor. I go back and forth on her as a person often, but dig over half her catalog. The big theatrical show doesn’t quite suit her particular stage presence. She is great when just talking to the crowd with her guitar or piano. Regardless, she was definitely having fun, it was entertaining enough, and it’s cool she put this up on Netflix so I don’t have to amputate a body part to afford a ticket.

If Beale Street Could Talk (2018): Without a doubt, this is perhaps the most genuine and fulfilling depiction of a (hetero) romantic love story put to film I’ve witnessed in recent memory. The actors and their chemistry were breathtaking. 

Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse (2018): Hands down the best Spider-Man movie to date. Soundtrack was perfection. Story was great. Characters were amazing. I want to protect Miles with my dying breath. Unique animation. Deservedly kicked Disney’s ass this award season.

Bumblebee (2018): Oddly endearing? Easily the best Transformers movie, and the only one I’ll recognize.

A Star is Born (2018): I’m sure I’d like this more if I weren’t a fan of the other 3. Lacked subtlety. Overhyped. It’s fine. The only best part was the rehab scene.

Fyre Fraud (2019): The Hulu documentary about the disastrous Fyre Festival. Superior of the two, in production and scope.

Abducted in Plain Sight (2017): WHAT. THE. FUCK. A must-see for true crime enthusiasts. 

Conversations with a Killer: The Ted Bundy Tapes (2019): This is more or less the same thing if you have already spent a little more time on this case than the average person. Good content for first-timers.

Girlfriends Day (2017): A nice, fast watch to pass the time.

Fyre Festival (2019): The other Fyre Festival documentary. To me, the lesser because it is produced from people who were on the inside. Which you’d think, “Oh so then they’d know.” But their bias and attempts to scrub themselves from the narrative are obvious.

The Favourite (2018): This made my little queer heart so happy. Great characters. 

Everybody Knows (2019): A little on the nose in the mystery itself (just watch the actors in the background). But the performances were great. Loved the setting. Appropriate ending. Good job.

Isn’t It Romantic (2019): I loved this. I feel like I’ve written something exactly like this before. Very endearing and satisfying to watch.

How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World (2019): It felt a little long, unsatisfying at some parts and rushed. But it’s a great bookend to a great series.

They Shall Not Grow Old (2019): Very impressive filmmaking and editing. I loved learning how they accomplished it in the featurette at the end of the screening.

Arctic (2019): Now THIS is how you make a survival movie. 90 minutes. No romance. Brutal reality without becoming melodramatic. Mads Mikkelsen cast in the lead...

Don’t Knock Twice (2016): Pleh. I hated the pacing and editing. Called out the “twist” immediately as a joke because I didn’t expect this movie to be that nuanced (magic done without permission, even with the intent to be good, is bad magic).

Captain Marvel (2019): My god this was so much fun and rejuvenated my interest in the MCU. I’m absolutely dreading Endgame and not for the reasons you think.

Greta (2019): Great performances, absolutely tense, very creepy and fun.

1922 (2017): What a great fucking motif.

Climax (2019): This was quite the sit. A literal 90 minute bad LSD trip from an up-close perspective. God I hated it.

Michael Che Matters (2016): I’ve never seen a standup special start so strong and progressively get weaker like this before...

Us (2019): As I said on Twitter --  it seems to me primarily casual or non-horror fans think Us is the greatest horror film of all time and is going to rejuvenate or “save” the genre. Then primarily veteran fans think it’s weak and vague. I think both viewpoints are shortsighted and formed from either category being stuck in their perspectives. For me, the movie was neither. (I loved it).

The Beach Bum (2019): Another movie I can���t believe I sat all the way through.

Leaving Neverland (2019): I stand with Wade and James.

Queer Eye (Season 3): Who needs antidepressants? Not me!

Homecoming: A Film By Beyoncé (2019): Beychella reigns once again!!

Dancing Queen (Season 1): This was very sweet. I never thought I could sit through anything with insufferable dance moms, but Justin/Alyssa makes it so engaging and watchable. Stupid to end on a cliffhanger, however.

Avengers: Endgame (2019): ..............B+ At least it was a million times better than Infinity War. And I had fun.

Booksmart (2019): This hit so close to home. Sure, the coming of age movie is nothing new. But there was something liberating about the characters in this one that were terribly stereotypical and much more relatable. To me, anyway.

Long Shot (2019): Great music, great relationship, great laughs. This was a fun, solid watch of a romcom.

Hail Satan? (2019): I want to inject this documentary directly into my veins.

Amazing Grace (2019): The live footage of Aretha Franklin recording her Amazing Grace album at the church in Watts.

Meeting Gorbachev (2019): I got to see this documentary at a theater where Wener Herzog himself was hosting a Q&A and introduced this film. Maybe it made me more biased to liking it. But I honestly felt like I learned a lot.

Missing Link (2019): First movie of the year I didn’t complete/walked out of. I let it have an hour. First time I’ve ever been disappointed in Laika. I can’t believe it. It was so dull and I kept waiting for something to happen.

Little (2019): This was sweet. Issa Rae is dipped in gold. BUT it felt like there was an outline, not a script. Lots of dropped threads. And a weirdly out of place, glaring, punching-down trans joke??!

Tolkien (2019): Wow. I really liked this. Great pacing, shifting between time frames. Even better performances and relationships. Made me think of my own fellowship a lot. This is how biopics should be done.

The Biggest Little Farm (2019): WONDERFUL documentary covering the years of building up a sustainable farm from less than scratch.

The Hustle (2019): God, this was a long, humorless sit. At least Anne looked stunning.

The Sun is Also a Star (2019): This isn’t more realistic than romantic comedies, or teen love films. But it’s more enjoyable than most. The leads are great and have electric chemistry. New York is framed beautifully.

John Wick: Chapter 3 – Parabellum (2019): I am blessed by this Keanu Reevessance.

Fleabag (Season 1): This is probably going to be the best thing I watch this year.

Fleabag (Season 2): Yup. Confirmed. Something very special would need to come along from June to December to change this mindset. I highly recommend this. Watch it. Go in blind. Watch it!!

Pavarotti (2019): I enjoy documentaries where I feel I really learn about the subject. Beautiful music, beautiful memories, beautiful life.

Rocketman (2019): I wish more biopics were like this. It was wonderful and such a grand time.

Lorena (2019): A deep dive into the Bobbitt case, including the woman herself. I have such empathy and love for Lorena. You should watch it and learn about the incident yourself.

The Last Man in San Francisco (2019): Go in blind. Don’t look it up. Just go. it’s the most beautiful film I’ve seen so far this year. I wish there were more male protagonists like this.

Toy Story 4 (2019): I was so skeptical. It more than exceeded my expectations. Just go in prepared to have your heart ripped in two.

Godzilla: King of the Monsters (2019): They’re learning. Out of the newer films, this one has the less amount of people. Now make another film like this, only extend the monster fight scenes. Less. People.

Child’s Play (2019): This was fun. Not much more to say. More Aubrey in things!

Men in Black International (2019): Honestly, this was better than the second or third ones. I legitimately enjoyed myself. It was funny. The cast was charming. The otherworldly aliens were interesting. And I’m so proud of Les Twins.

Grace and Frankie (Season 5) :This is always a good time for me. I love watching this show when I want to take a break from more dedicated watches. I love these actresses with all my heart. June Diane Raphael is goals.

Midsommar (2019): This was such a fun aesthetic to watch. I was so uncomfortable throughout.

Toni Morrison: The Pieces I Am (2019): Ugh, my hearrrrrtt.

Maiden (2019): Documentary about the first all-female crew who competed in the 1985-86 Whitbread Round the World Race. The woman next to me in the theater was the same age as the women featured in old footage and modern day talking head interviews -- and she was just sobbing by the end. Solidarity.

Frankenstein’s Monster’s Monster, Frankenstein (2019): 30 minutes well spent. Fucking hilarious.

Stranger Things (Season 3): God, what a fun season. I am still Steve.

Queer Eye (Season 4): I need 54 more seasons, kthx.

Spider-Man: Far From Home (2019): My absolute favorite battle sequence in a Marvel movie. Such a good time.

Hobbs & Shaw (2019): My first and last Fast movie. Goddamn I was so bored.

Bring the Soul: The Movie (2019): Wow, this was brutal. I get it wasn’t all of the footage, but they seemed to mostly focus on members being sick and injured and miserable. I didn’t understand the love for this movie when all it did was highlight how exhausted the boys are. I suppose it was meant to be inspiring, but I only felt bad for them. I just ranted about them needing a break and thank god they finally have one -- apt timing!

Burn the Stage: The Movie (2018): I went back to the earlier film with the hopes of... Higher hopes. And they were fulfilled. Such cute and uplifting footage.

Blinded by the Light (2019): God I love Springsteen. This movie is a great homage to his music. It’s not a straight-up musical, and that’s lovingly the point. Some things never change.

It: Chapter Two (2019): This was a slog compared to the first part. Much like the miniseries. Much like the book.

Parasite (2019): I, a college student with very little free time -- let alone free time to go to the movies -- saw this in theaters twice. I tried to go a third time but then finals happened. Go see it. Go see it blind. I'm not really doing end-year lists anymore but this is without a doubt my favorite film from 2019.

BTS World Tour: Love Yourself (2019): Most fun I've had in a theater in some time. I feel like I curled up into the tiniest ball at some point out of pure joy that couldn't be contained.

Frozen II (2019): This was quite plot-heavy for a sequel. I loved how many songs they were. It's an acceptable sequel. A lot of weak themes and choices, however, if you think about it for more than a few minutes. Overall delightful. 

Jojo Rabbit (2019): Speaking of delightful. Taika Waititi continues to be my favorite living writer-director. This is such a solid portrayal of Nazism without glorifying it. Always go the Mel Brooks route and make it a comedy; they can't turn it around and make the imagery propaganda. I have high hopes for Roman Griffin Davis and his future career.

Knives Out (2019): This was quite fun. I love a good mystery with a large ensemble cast like this. It didn't blow my mind of anything -- I saw every turn coming -- but that's just because I credit it to being such a lonely kid who read so many mystery novels.

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