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lanshappycorner · 3 years

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Deuce Spade facts and fun facts🥳🥳

This is a list of facts and fun facts about Deuce! This list is based on true facts only and any observations I've made, however observations can be subjective, so those will be labeled properly! Let's start off with some facts already in the wiki :)

First Yr, class 1-A, student no.24

Birthday: June 3

Age: at the beginning of the game, Deuce is 16, but currently, he is 17 [his profile in game has not been updated, but as time is proven to flow in game, it is unclear but can be interpreted that the characters do canonly age]

Gemini

173 cm / 5'8" ft

Homeland: Rose kingdom

Family: Mother, Grandmother, it is implied that his father is out of the picture as Deuce states that he is the only man in the family so his father has either left or is dead

Club: Track and Field [alongside Jack]

Best subject: PE

Dominant hand: Right

Fav food: Egg dishes / omurice

Least fav food: Bell peppers

Dislikes: Limited time sales

Hobby: Magical wheel (twst motorcycle I guess but it looks kinda funky)

Talents: Machinery Maintainance [good with fixing gadgets and etc]

Used to be a delinquent before he heard his mother crying on the phone to his grandmother about his behavior. Afterwards he decided to change

Owns a pink leopard printed suit

Cannot do middle school math, he will take a lot of time to solve simple Algebra problems

Gets nervous and stops functioning entirely when talking to women

Onto some fun facts outside of the wiki! These facts have been gathered from various sources (ppl who can read japanese, ppl who have told me abt info in the twst guidebook, twitter, and ofc the main translated story), but I cannot prove 100% authenticity of this, so take it with a gain of salt

Canonly a pretty boy. Deuce is described as the "cool pretty type" in the twst guidebook

Smells like flowers [applies to all students from Rose kingdom]

A romantic, he admired the king and queen of heart's relationship and trey teased him about it

Thought that baby chicks hatch from store bought eggs until the MC and Grim told him the truth

Can cook eggs (he likes them over easy)

Wanted to make a magical wheel club but was rejected so he joined track and field

Bought magical wheel magazines when he was younger and studied it

Wanted to ride his magical wheel in the heartslabyul maze (mentioned he forgets bad things when he rides it so like...it makes him feel better)

Hates limited times sales/shopping but is extremely good at it. He can remember the price of an item, when exactly it sells out, the percentage/probability of when it can sell out, discount prices and pretty much any math that has to do with it [he's extremely good at shopping because his mother brought him out a lot with her to limited time sales]

In addition to the point above, it is implied he can memorize and calculate that for pretty much every item he intends on buying (everything I listed above is in relation to the time he bought 20 limited time puddings which greatly impressed Sebek who wasn't able to grab even 1, but it was later revealed that he also bought 8 bag full of items requested by Trey for baking, as well as the others probably from heartslabyul) so basically Deuce big brain and very good memorization abilities

Hilariously in the instance above, Sebek, who is like...a real fae, has said that what Deuce did was not something a human can do

Flirted with a plant because vil was fucking around with him and told him to

Was ready to fist fight Riddle

Was about to go find Leona to beat him up but Vil was like do u have no fear and Deuce pretty much said that he can get thru to Leona with his muscles

Was about to fight Malleus (jesus christ) but ended up fixing his tamagotchi and came out completely loaded and rich (good for deuce, get that cha ching babey)

Won a Track and Field competition (noted to be rare for a first year)

He is literally a pretty boy, it's been pointed out that he looks good in the ceremonial clothes (but we already know that)

Admires Riddle and sees him as a role model, has called him boss (like...yakuza boss terminology) once

[Observation] Has a pretty good relationship with Jamil as he has asked Jamil to help him practice his Stargazer dance, and mentioned him once again when talking about how Jamil fixed his hat and said that he was a reliable upperclassman

Has said fuck and would not hesitate to say it again 🥺

Has been called honest and cute, was fawned over by kalim and trey. Kalim said Deuce was similar to his younger brothers

During his delinquent phase, he was blamed for many things he didn't do as well, Deuce said that he realized no one believed in him despite what he says, but because a policeman stood up for him, he wanted to become a cop when he grew up

Used intimidation tactics [the equivalent of "u wanna fucking go let's go I'll beat ur ass" to scare off ppl and silver was like hm I will have to try that sometime, to which deuce was pretty much like ahahah no dont

Deuce refers to Yuu as his "mabu", basically calling Yuu his best friend

He can change a lightbulb, and he talks abt hand washing materials and just domestic house stuff in general as if it's common knowledge. In other words it's implied Deuce is really good at housework due to doing a lot for his mother

When he was a kid, he used to cry because he thought there were monsters outside, but it was just hanging laundry

Is more scared of Riddle than ghosts

It's implied that one time (or several times...) he stayed after school with Crewel, and the poor guy had to attempt to explain the same concept over and over again to Deuce for hours until he understood

Ace always cheats in card games with Deuce, so Deuce claims that it's not very fun playing with him

Bad at astrology bc apparently all stars look the same to him

Likes cafe latte

Does tease ppl, he once messed with Yuu and in the process called Ace "Ace-kun" (Ace called him "Deuce-kun" as well). There has been an instance where he's teased Jack about his Niceness TM

Used to have over 30 gang members following him at age 14-15. (You'd think that him being so young would make him like a lackey but no he was the boss)

Has a thing for summoning cauldrons since he was young, but apparently you need to have a large amount of magic capabilities to summon objects, so [observation] deuce may actually be extremely powerful bc he was able to summon things at a young age, but he hasn't refined his powers yet so he still seems weak compared to a lot of the cast

During his delinquent phase, apparently he had a really wild hairstyle and he used his magic on people weaker than him

[Observation] Deuce is actually pretty good at lying. In his Halloween card he was able to put up a good act and deceive some of his ex gang members into following him into the forest before mildly roughing them up (keep in mind that he has not had contact with these ppl for at least a year, yet somehow he was able to assert enough authority to tell them to follow him. Also, he thought of this plan on the spot, and acted malicious enough so that the gang members would believe in him—which proves that he's not only quick witted but a convincing actor, as Jamil actually believed his act for a while)

It's implied that he and Ace are often in leadership positions, as they helped to lead heartslabyul in designing their Halloween booth, but they also mentioned that it was much easier compared to organizing unbirthday parties

[Observation] despite wanting to be an honor student, Deuce is still able to take unjustly means to achieve his goals (EX. Making a deal with Azul to pass his test), in general, deuce doesn't care too much about the method, be it through cheating or violence to get to his goal, but he does value a fair battle

[Observation] a lot of Deuce's strengths are subtle as we are frequently told abt how much of a bad student he is, but if u rly think abt it, deuce is put in leadership positions a lot, he's good a memorization and small technical details, he can be at times quick witted and deceiving, and he has the potential to be extremely powerful in magic. In conclusion Deuce is a menace and once we find out what his unique magic is I'm 100.01% sure he will become a greater menace and I think he should fight a lot of people and win

That will be all for this post! There may be more fun facts/observations that I may have missed, but feel free to add on to this! Anyways thank u for reading and please stan Deuce Spade♠️💙

#please read this i spent hours on it <3 #i am sorry for being a walking deuce encyclopedia #twisted wonderland #deuce spade #twisted wonderland deuce #twst deuce

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junetuesday · 4 years

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sweetener - [ten]

Questions and Answers

Pairing: Tom Holland x Female Reader - uni AU

Word Count: 6935

Warnings: fluff, smut (oral [m receiving]), the odd f-bomb

A/N: wow ok hi it’s been a lil while!! i can only apologise for leaving you on that bit of a cliffhanger and say i’ve been going thru it more than usual i guess. i can’t say for sure if or when i’m gonna be back with weekly updates but i’ll let ya know! thanks for being patient and sticking with me 🖤 special shoutout to @fallingspidey for her endless support for this fic and for keeping me motivated and inspired over the last lil bit. however if there are errors in this blame her for prESSURING ME (jk don’t)

Add yourself to my taglist(s) - nb: lots of people i couldnt tag so lemme know if you changed your url or whatever!!

Updates...who’s to say...?

All in all, Tom was happy to be back at uni. It had been nice to see his family and friends (and his dog - especially his dog), but if he was honest then he'd have to say that his favourite part of his Christmas break had been talking to you. Texting, talking on the phone, Snapchats here and there - yeah, all that.

January exams were looming, so much closer and so much more daunting once New Year had come and gone, but you helped there, too. As promised, you'd helped make a revision plan for him. You claimed it was a welcome break from your own revision - which sounded truly horrific to Tom but you seemed to enjoy yourself doing it and it was actually extremely helpful, so he wasn't complaining. He was mostly sticking to it too, though admittedly he was having trouble concentrating. Everything was distracting, and nothing seemed to be going into his brain, and all too often his mind started to wander away from environmental factors on human mental and physical health and towards...well. Other things. Things that would most certainly not be on his exam. After one particularly fruitless study session, spent mostly attempting to decipher his own handwriting where he'd scribbled notes on a print out of the slides from a lecture he didn't even remember being in, you'd suggested that maybe you could study together once you were back - maybe that way you could keep each other on track. Tom had agreed, of course, but he was sceptical - if you were there he was fairly certain he'd have even more difficulty concentrating on lifestyle risk factor modification.

Tonight, though, was a designated Night Off. Tom had had to come back to uni a few days earlier than you to work (which was pointless if you asked him, no one was on campus anyway, but such is life - he just read through lecture notes [read: fucked around on his phone] in between the occasional international student or faculty member who happened to wander in), and now that you were back too you'd arranged to go over to his for the evening. After it turned out you hadn't seen any of Tom's favourite movies, you'd each made a list of five movies the other person had to watch with you, as a sort of cinematic education. Your list consisted of Fight Club (obviously), Labyrinth, Legally Blonde, Donnie Darko, and A Walk to Remember, while Tom's was Shutter Island, Se7en, Primal Fear, Tropic Thunder, and Spirited Away. The plan for tonight, then, was to order pizza, finish Fight Club, and then watch a movie from his list, and just chill together. Totally casual. Not a big deal at all.

By the time Tom had come home from work and showered (and tidied his room, changed his bedsheets, cleaned the bathroom, and tidied the living room) it was almost 7:30pm, and you had not long texted to say you were on the way and to order the pizza. That done, he'd just about decided on a playlist to put on in the background and was checking his reflection in the mirror one more time when the doorbell rang, an 'outside x' text popping up on his phone simultaneously.

Tom tossed his phone onto his bed and pulled open his bedroom door, ruffling his hair nervously. He'd had it cut just before he left home and he was still getting used to it - you'd asked to see, and when he'd sent a picture you'd said you liked it, but he was feeling a little self-conscious about it. It wasn't anything too drastic, but it was a good bit shorter than it had been before, so it was still a change.

"Hey," he smiled as he opened the door, stepping back to let you in out of the cold.

"Hi - thanks," you breathed, your words hanging in a cloud in front of you as you stepped over the threshold. " s'fucking freezing."

"You can just...yeah." Tom pointed to his room, shutting the door behind you once you'd squeezed past him with a small smile.

You left the fresh, almost metallic smell of the cold outdoors in your wake as you dropped your bag by the door, sitting yourself down on the end of his bed and toeing off your boots as Tom followed you into his room. You were mumbling something about how much colder it was here than it was in your hometown - or maybe it was the other way around -- he had kind of stopped listening when you shrugged out of your coat and he realised you were wearing his hoodie underneath it. He'd been pretty sure he'd seen it on you in some of the Snaps and pictures you'd sent over Christmas, but he hadn't been certain and hadn't wanted to ask just in case it wasn't it. He was sure now though, that was definitely his hoodie that you were readjusting around your shoulders, sorting out the hood where it had gotten caught on your coat. Cool.

You'd talked so much over the past few weeks that Tom had kind of forgotten he hadn't actually spent that much time with you physically - like, texting and speaking on the phone now wasn't a big deal at all, there was next to no nervousness or awkwardness about what to say, but in person? In person, it was a little different, so he stayed over by the door, waiting to see what you would do next. You seemed to do the same thing, though, looking over at him expectantly after placing your coat neatly on top of your bag, and it occurred to him then that it was his house, so he should probably lead the way.

"So uh, it said it'd be about an hour before Dominos gets here - I guess they're busy..." he trailed off, but you just nodded so he figured he'd better say something else. "Do you wanna go in the living room or, uh, stay in here - no one's home, so's up to you."

"I'm good wherever," you shrugged, shuffling back a bit on the bed and twisting to face him as he moved further into the room. "Let's see your new hair then."

Tom chuckled as he sat down, the sound catching in his throat when you reached out to touch his cheek. Your hand was cold against his skin, gently tilting his head to the side to properly inspect his haircut under the ceiling light. He watched your face as you looked him over, a smile tugging at the corner of your lips when he caught your eye.

Your nails scratched his scalp softly as you ran your fingers through the back of his hair, the hairs just long enough to poke up between your fingers as they travelled upwards until they reached his crown. The top of his hair was longer, still long enough to start to curl if left untamed by product, as it was now. Tom had to fight to keep his eyes open as your fingers worked their way through his hair, getting warmer by the second and grazing across his skin every now and then. It wasn't too hard though, he just focused on you instead, your face so close that he could see every detail in your face - even if he couldn't quite read your expression.

You hummed to yourself thoughtfully, pushing his fringe back into place.

"Well, what's the verdict?"

"Yeah." You fiddled with the pieces by his ears, your head tilting to the side as your fingers smoothed the hair against his temples. Your eyes flicked to his face and back to his hair before you nodded, nibbling gently on your lower lip, slightly glossy with lip balm, and, if Tom remembered correctly, soft and warm and pliable and--

"Yeah, I like it," you announced, and it took Tom longer than it should have to work out what you were even talking about, his mind already several steps away from his haircut. "Suits you."

"Thanks."

You leant towards him as if you had read his mind, your fingers carding through his hair again as you angled your face to his. Tom just caught your eyes drifting shut before he mirrored you, your hands on the back of his neck bringing him closer until his lips met yours.

It was only when one of your hands moved to his cheek that he remembered that he, too, had hands - two of them, in fact - and that right now they were sitting uselessly in his lap. He remedied that quickly enough, one hand going on to the bed to support his weight as he leant into the kiss, the other coming to cup your face. It all became a bit of a blur then - your tongue dancing with his, him shuffling backwards on the bed as you shifted closer, his hands moving to your hips to support you as you climbed into his lap. Tom felt you giggle into the kiss when you both fell back onto the bed, but you didn't break apart; your fingers twisting tighter into his hair. His hands left your hips, roaming your body instead — your thighs either side of his hips, your ass where it rested on his lap, your waist — anywhere he could reach, really. He'd just slid his hands under the hem of your t shirt and over your back, his fingers just brushing over the band of your bra when you finally broke apart to breathe, your lips leaving his with a wet pop.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure," Tom hummed in response to the words you murmured against his cheek - he'd probably have said yes to literally anything you asked just then, if he was honest.

"Just..., uh-"

You pulled back a little, your hands leaving his hair and pressing into the mattress either side of his head to support your weight instead. Tom lowered his hands back down to your hips, blinking up at you as you sat up.

"What's up?"

"How many...um, like, what's your...ugh-" you squeezed your eyes shut, shaking your head like you were trying to physically dispel a thought from your mind before moving to lean over him once more. "Never mind, doesn't matter."

Something about your voice and the look on your face told him it did matter, though, the weight of unasked questions hanging heavy in the air between you. He kind of knew what you were asking but he wasn't 100% sure, so despite parts of him screaming for him to leave it for now, instead of angling his face to yours, Tom tilted his head away from you.

"No, go on. What did you wanna ask?"

He propped himself up on his elbows as you picked at your fingers, his hands dropping from your hips to rest atop your thighs.

"Just like...who...like, have you, you know-"

"How many people have I slept with?"

You nodded, glancing up at him for a second before returning your attention to your cuticles.

"Uh, three, I guess?"

You nodded again before tilting your head to the side, shifting your attention from your right ring finger to your left thumb.

"And were they like...girlfriends...? Or, I dunno, you know..."

Your gaze was fixed so intently on your hands that Tom couldn't help but look at them too, though he wasn't really thinking about them at all. He was more confused about why you were asking about this now, and he couldn't really gauge your reaction to his 'number' - did you think that three was too many or not enough? And did you want them to be girlfriends, or not? It was all too much to think about all at once, so he decided it was probably safest to just tell the truth.

"One was, yeah; one was sort of a one-time-thing, and uh, the other one's you, so..." he trailed off, not quite sure where to categorise you.

"Oh. Cool."

Cool? What does that mean????

You took a deep breath in and opened your mouth like you were about to say something else, maybe ask a follow up question, but then your shoulders slumped and you went silent.

"Go on, what were you gonna say?"

"So like-" you began, sniffing as you turned your attention back to your ring finger, rubbing at a pen mark on your knuckle this time instead of picking at your nail bed. "Are you still like, friends with her? Your ex, I mean."

"I guess? I mean we don't really talk or anything but I saw her over Christmas when we all went out..." Tom's brain ticktickticked away as he talked, still not sure where you were going with this - until it clicked. "Oh did you see her on Instagram or something?"

Tom's insides felt weird as he said it, his tummy going all squiggly - until you nodded, and it flipped over altogether. He had noticed you had been a bit quieter when he spoke to you the day after Boxing Day, but he'd figured it was just because of that Post-Christmas Emptiness everyone gets, plus maybe you were irritated that he'd been drunk texting you while you were studying, and then you kind of went back to normal again and he forgot about it. But maybe he was wrong. Maybe you were...jealous?

"I wasn't like, stalking or anything, I was just - I saw people tagged on your story and I was bored so I was just, I dunno, browsing, and I saw a picture of you on her page and I..." You rambled, your words skipping each other in their rush to get out. "I, yeah, I dunno why I even brought it up. Sorry, it's none of my business I—"

"It's cool," Tom cut you off then, sitting up properly because it was kind of distracting having you shifting about on top of him while you were having this conversation.

You got the hint, shifting off of him and sitting cross-legged opposite him while he scooted back until he was leaning back against the wall at the head of his bed.

"Yeah, I mean-" he started, not really sure where to begin. "She, we - Kim, and me, we were friends at school and then I guess we were together for like, a year or so? Then we both went to uni and it just kind of...fizzled out? Didn't see each other a lot and by Christmas we'd kind of realised neither of us really minded so we just kinda called it quits."

It was weird to talk about, sure, but not exactly bad. It wasn't a difficult breakup, and, as far as he knew anyway, they were both kind of ambivalent about it. They'd had a good time together, and he supposed he did love her in the way that you do love someone when you're 17 and they're your first real anything, but they grew apart as a couple and it was just kind of...fine. Honestly, he hadn't even thought about her in a while.

You'd nodded along as Tom talked, humming thoughtfully when he finished.

"Is that not weird? Hanging out as friends after you were...more?"

Your tone shifted back towards normal, that hint of nervousness fading away and your head tilting to the side curiously.

"Not really?" Tom shrugged, trying to cast his mind back. "At first it was, I suppose. Like last summer - the first couple of times we saw each other were kind of awkward but nah," he shook his head. "Not really. Just kinda went back to how it was before - kinda had to, like we have all the same friends, you know?"

You nodded once slowly, like you were considering it, then again quicker and more decisively.

"Fair enough."

You reached out and started playing with his sleeve, your fingers grazing over his wrist. The heaviness in the air had lifted, your face relaxed as your eyes focused on the ribbed cuff of his sweatshirt beneath your fingers. Tom's flicked back and forth between the two, keeping them on your face a little longer each time.

"What about the other person?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah," Tom mumbled, his brain taking a moment to catch up with what you were talking about. "I had this one weird Tinder date not long after we broke up."

You laughed, glancing up at him as you fiddled with his fingers. "Weird, how?"

Sighing, he flipped his hand over that so his palm faced upwards, both of you looking at your hands as he spoke.

"I mean the date was fine, you know, like it went well-"

"Very well, if they're on the list?" you chuckled.

"Yeah, that's what I thought, right?" Tom laughed dryly. "But it turned out that she, um, she was kind of in this open relationship where they were both allowed to see other people - but only once?"

You stopped playing with his fingers, looking over at him instead.

"Oh?"

"Yeah...I dunno, like..."

Tom mumbled under his breath as his brain stumbled over the words, trying and failing to find the right ones. Somehow this was more awkward to talk about than his actual relationship. Maybe because that made sense, at least to him, whereas this still had him pretty baffled.

He didn't know if it was just because it has been his first time putting himself back out there and it hadn't gone to plan, or if it was because he really had thought the girl was into him and it turned out he was wrong, but either way the experience had knocked his confidence. It sounded stupid, really, it shouldn't have been a big deal - people have one night stands all the time, right? So what if nothing else happened and it didn't lead to anything more. Perhaps he'd been naive to think it would have, perhaps that was all on him. He didn't think he was, though - it wasn't like they'd met drunk in a club and ended up going home together; they'd been texting for a while before they met up in person. They'd had time to get to know each other a bit - and more than enough time for her to mention that, you know, 'hey, I'm seeing someone so this is just a one-time-only just-sex thing'. Maybe it was just the ambiguity of it all that he didn't like, maybe if she had mentioned it beforehand then maybe he would have still gone ahead with it and he wouldn't feel so weird about it.

As it was though, he did feel weird about it, and he'd never really told anyone what actually happened before, so he was struggling for words a little bit. He looked up when you started tracing the lines of his palm with your fingertip, though - it tickled a bit, but it was enough of a distraction that he was able to formulate a sentence.

"Yeah so we like, went for a drink or whatever and...yeah. And then when I texted her a few days later or whatever she was just like 'yeah no so here's the thing'..." he shrugged, leaving the explanation at that - that was all he knew, really, anyway.

"What the fuck?" You chuckled incredulously. "Surely that's the kind of thing you tell someone going into it, like 'hey, heads up-' kinda thing?"

Tom just nodded, sighing.

"But yeah, anyway, so that was that I guess."

He twisted his wrist so that your palms were pressed together, fingers interlocked, and gave a gentle squeeze. You gave him a small smile, and he hoped that meant you interpreted what he was trying to say without actually saying it: that he didn't really want to talk about it anymore, but that he didn't mind that you asked - he understood the need for clarity all too well. He wanted to ask you about your past experiences - boyfriends, girlfriends, anything - but he figured if you wanted to tell him, then you would. So, he changed the subject slightly.

"Can I ask you a question?"

You hummed and nodded as you let go of his hand, moving to reposition yourself.

"Do you have a three date rule?"

"Do I have a what?" you looked at him quizzically as you uncrossed your legs, moving to they were tucked underneath you and to the side, leaning your body against his outstretched legs.

"I dunno, I saw it in a movie I think. Like, some girls won't sleep with someone until the third date..."

Saying it out loud it sounded pretty stupid, but he'd said it now. He kind of wished he hadn't though because it sounded like he was saying 'why didn't you sleep with me?!', and that really wasn't what he meant, but then you started to laugh.

"Oh no - I uh. Before...I was...on."

"Oh..." he nodded slowly, his mouth gaping and eyes widening once he actually understood what you were saying. "Oh!"

You're such a fucking idiot, mate.

"Yeah...so...sorry."

"It's okay!" he laughed quickly. "I wasn't - I didn't mean - obviously you didn't have to, you don't have to-"

You silenced him then with a hand on his thigh, your face softening as your laugh faded to a shy smile.

"I know what you meant. I wanted to - I mean I, I want to."

"Cool."

That settled that, then. Tom just nodded as he leant forward, bending his knee up as he reached out to cup your cheek. Your hand lingered on his thigh, the other coming to touch his neck as he kissed you. You leaned closer, into the kiss - or, at least, that's what he thought you were doing, so he did too - but then your mouths bumped together a bit more forcefully than intended and it turned out you were actually getting to your knees.

"Sorry," you giggled against his lips, pressing a soothing kiss to the spot where your teeth had grazed his lip slightly. Tom breathed out a laugh in reply as you pecked your way along his jaw and onto his neck, your breath hot on his skin — until it wasn't anymore.

"Wait, three dates?" You sat back on your heels, looking at him with a curious smile on your face.

Dammit.

"Oh, um, I mean," - so embarrassing, Jesus - "If you count the, uh-"

"-the library?"

"Yeah," he mumbled, feeling his face getting hotter by the second.

But then you smiled, a toothy grin that broke into a giggle as you shook your head.

"You're so cute."

Unfortunately - or fortunately, depending how he looked at it - Tom didn't have time to say something incredibly cheesy like 'no you're so cute' because your lips were already back on his, both of your hands holding his face firmly.

He could feel you shuffling closer, so Tom let his body slip down the bed as you kissed, your hands on his cheeks keeping him close while his hands slipped inside your open hoodie to grasp at the sides of your t shirt to pull you on top of him. Your thighs straddling his hips, warmth flooded his body wherever you touched him, his hands wandering over your hips and thighs as your tongue explored his mouth delicately.

By the time you shrugged out of your hoodie he was properly hard - he had kind of been getting there before and it hadn't really gone away which was a little awkward but it was full-on now, pressing against your thigh through his jeans. Plus the way you were shifting about on top of him trying to get your hands out of the sleeves without breaking the kiss wasn't exactly helping. Your lips stilled against his for a second as you struggled but you got there at last, tossing the hoodie aside and onto the floor. Tom expected your hands to return to their usual position in his hair, but they didn't. Instead they pressed into the mattress either side of his ribs, your lips leaving his with a wet smack as you got to your hands and knees.

You crawled backwards down the bed, Tom's hands falling to his sides once your waist was finally out of his reach. He watched you press kisses to his abdomen, a strip of his skin exposed where his shirt had ridden up. He tensed his abs involuntarily (okay, maybe a little bit voluntarily) when you pushed it up further, glancing up at him as if asking permission before undoing the top button of his jeans.

Tom bit his lip as he lifted his hips, tucking his thumbs under the waistband to help you push his jeans down to his knees. Your hands rested on his hips as you repositioned yourself back over him, your thumbs moving in slow circles in a gentle massage. His jaw tensed when the edge of one of your thumbs just grazed his balls through the cotton of his boxers, tenting over his hard cock. His Adam's apple bobbed in his throat as he watched you lean down and scatter yet more kisses across his torso, sending butterflies and shockwaves and every-other-cliche-in-the-fucking-book shooting through him. You pushed his t shirt up further, your kisses travelling back down over his stomach until you were hovering tantalisingly over his cock, fingers poised at the waistband on his boxers as you looked up at him again.

"Can I...?" you murmured, the warmth of your breath spreading through the thin material.

Tom just nodded and made a noise he wasn't entirely sure was comprehensible, but you seemed to get the gist, pulling his boxers down and continuing your trail of kisses over his hip.

He tried to control his breathing as he watched you intently, getting closer and closer to his cock until you finally tilted your head and pressed an open mouthed kiss to the side of his shaft. He grunted at the feeling, your tongue warm and wet and firm on his skin as you worked your way up towards the head. Once you reached the top, though, instead of taking him into your mouth like he so desperately wanted you to, you just let your breath ghost over his sensitive skin before leaving another line of kisses down the other side, and it took all his strength not to groan in frustration. He settled on balling his hands into fists at his sides, and he couldn't be 100% sure but he thought he heard you giggle, your breath tickling him slightly.

Trying to focus on his breathing again, Tom took a deep breath in - a breath that caught in his throat when you licked a long, wet strip along the length of his cock as you took it into your hand. Your fingers wrapped around the base as your lips wrapped around the head, and he remembered how to breathe - enough to exhale, anyway - as you bobbed your head, taking more of him into your mouth each time.

The fingers on your free hand dug into his hip as you began to suck properly, your cheeks hollowing around him.

"Oh fuck-"

You bobbed your head a few more times as he moaned, before coming off him altogether and sitting up. You swallowed as you looked up at him again, and between your tongue darting out to lick your lips before pulling the bottom one between your teeth, glistening and swollen, and your hand pumping the full length of his cock, Tom wasn't sure where to look.

"Have you got a condom?"

He only nodded at first, his mouth taking a second to catch up while you looked at him expectantly.

"Yeah, um," he turned his head towards his bedside cabinet where he'd stashed some earlier. "Top drawer, I can-"

"I got it."

You let go of his dick when you leaned over to open the drawer, and it was then when he felt a rush of cool air that Tom became aware that he was lying there with his knob out while you were basically still fully dressed - which, obviously, would not do at all.

He brought his hands to your waist, pushing up your t-shirt as you took a condom from the drawer and set it on top. You giggled as you leant back over him again; he felt it tickling his lips before you kissed him. He tugged at your shirt as you kissed, messier and deeper than before, pulling it up as far as he could until you had to pull apart for you to take it off over your head. Reaching up to cup your face once your shirt was cast aside, he pulled you back in for another kiss. Tom could feel the heat of your pussy through your leggings when his thigh rubbed between your legs as he kicked off his jeans and boxers, making you whimper into his mouth and grind against him, your fingers curling into his hair.

Keeping one hand on your cheek, he moved the other to the small of your back to hold you close as he rolled you over. He felt you breathing heavily in his ear as he kissed your neck once he was hovering over you, trying to pull your leggings down with one hand. You lifted your hips to help, but unfortunately you could only get so far until he had to stop kissing you and sit back on his heels to let you wiggle out of both them and your knickers, taking the opportunity to shed his t shirt and sweatshirt while you did so.

You smiled and sat up once you were down to only your bra, placing a hand on his chest and kissing him softly - in another setting, it would have been sweet; chaste, even. As it was, sweet was probably not the word he would have chosen. His hands held your hips but you were the one in control, maneuvering your bodies until he was flat on his back and you were straddling his thighs - where you belonged, as far as he was concerned.

Reaching between your thighs, Tom looked up at your face as his fingers spread you open. Your eyes snapped shut, your breathing hitching with a quiet oh as he dipped his middle finger inside you. The fingers on your right hand tensed where it rested on his chest, your back arching as your left hand toyed with your breast through your bra while he spread your wetness along the length of your pussy, his fingers circling your clit before moving back down to push two fingers inside you. Eyes opening as you rolled your hips, you held his gaze as you ground onto his hand, biting your lip as his fingers curled inside you. You moaned softly when he moved his fingers back to your clit, slick from inside you and sliding easily between your folds.

Just the sight of you on top of him like this made him swallow harshly, his dick twitching against his abdomen as if to say excuse me?? I'm here too, you know??? And maybe you saw him glance at his cock, or maybe it was just a coincidence, but you leaned over to grab the condom from the bedside cabinet.

"D'you want me to-" Tom started as you sat back down, trailing off when you passed the packet to him.

"Thanks."

He could feel you watching him as he rolled the condom on, but he was pretty sure he could only focus on one thing at a time in that moment so he kept his eyes down, fingers working as deftly as he could manage. You leaned forward to kiss him once he finally looked back up at you, and as you did he noticed he goosebumps that had erupted across your body, your skin bumpy and cool under his fingertips as he ran his hands over your shoulders.

"You cold?" he murmured in between kisses, feeling you chuckle against his lips, then another kiss before you mumbled back.

"A bit, yeah."

Another beat of silence passed, your sentences interspersed with kisses.

"Wanna" -kiss- "get under the covers...?"

-Kiss kiss-

"Yes, please."

You kissed him one, two, three more times before you pulled away. Between the two of you you managed to get the duvet pulled out from underneath Tom and up over you, and soon he was tucking it around your shoulders as you settled back on top of him.

"Better?" he smirked.

"Mmhmm."

Tom just caught your appreciative smile before you kissed him again, moaning against his lips when his cock nudged between your folds as you leant over him. Lifting his hips as you lowered yours, he finally slid inside you.

He held your waist under the duvet, squeezing your ass and thighs every now and then, but you were setting the pace, your face buried against his shoulder as you moved your body back and forth over his slowly and purposefully. He tilted his head to kiss you occasionally - sometimes slow and sensual, open mouthed kisses with your lips moving with his, and sometimes returning the marks you were sucking and biting onto his neck. Curses and grunts of your name passed his lips more and more once you started to clench around him, your hips faltering as your movements sped up.

Your fingernails dug into the back of his neck as you grasped his face, kissing him fervently before your mouth fell open above his when he started to thrust up into you more forcefully, his grip on your hips tightening.

"Oh fuck," you breathed as you reached a hand between your bodies to hurriedly rub at your clit. "M'gonna come-"

That alone was almost enough to send Tom over the edge, moaned breathlessly into his open mouth with your forehead pressed to his; so combine it with the way your wet, hot pussy was spasming around his cock, your free hand tugging on his hair, and he was done for, his mind going blank of everything except you and the feeling of being buried deep inside you as you came together.

Both of your thrusts slowed back to a lazy grind, his arms wrapping around your body as it went slack on top of his. You nuzzled your face against his cheek as you caught your breath, your arms looping loosely around his neck. Full disclosure, it was a bit too hot being under the covers and under you, but Tom wasn't complaining.

You must have felt it too though, because after a minute or two you pressed a more definitive kiss to his jaw before untangling yourself from him and sitting up. You were only just upright when the doorbell rang loudly, followed obnoxiously quickly by a series of knocks at the front door, both of you jumping and whipping your heads around to look at Tom's bedroom door as though it might spring open.

"Dominos?" You guessed, looking back at Tom where he lay beneath you.

"Must be, yeah."

You both glanced down at your bodies, both naked and him still inside you - it was his house though, so he figured he should do the chivalrous thing and volunteer.

"I'll go."

"Cheers," you laughed as you climbed off him and plonked yourself down on the bed.

Taking the condom off as he got up, Tom tossed it into the bin under his desk while he scanned the floor for some clothes. He found his boxers and jeans easy enough, but they were all tangled together and the doorbell was ringing again, so he ended up throwing them back on the floor with a frustrated groan and breathy chuckle when you laughed from your spot on the bed. He grabbed his dressing gown off the back of his door instead, tying it tightly around his body before going out to answer the door, glancing in the hall mirror to see how obvious it was what he'd just been up to (answer: very, but there wasn't much he could do about it seeing as it sounded like the delivery guy was about to bash the door down with his bare fists judging by how aggressively he was pounding on it).

"Hey, sorry. Was uh, in the...shower."

"Delivery."

For all his impatience to get someone to answer the door, the delivery guy had seemingly decided to take his sweet time pulling each box out of the insulated bag one-by-fucking-one. He didn't even look up, no matter how many different ways Tom thanked him as he handed him each box.

"Thanks, cheers, great, thank you—" he was running out of ways to say thank you, but he just wanted the entire interaction to be over so he could get away from the street and put some fucking underwear on. His agitation appeared to have no effect on the delivery guy though, who only murmured one sullen "enjoy" before turning away and going back to his car once he'd finally finished handing over Tom's order.

By the time he backed into his room with his arms full of boxes, you'd put your t shirt and knickers back on and were smoothing out the duvet on top of his bed.

"I can't decide if that was bad timing or perfect timing."

"Me neither," Tom laughed, setting the boxes on the end of the bed. "Both, I think?"

"I'm gonna go... you know..." you gestured vaguely to your lower half as you headed towards the door, leaving Tom to fill in the blanks. He just nodded sagely - he had some of that to do himself.

"You said no one's home, right?" you paused by the door, your hand resting on the handle.

"Yeah," he laughed. "You're good."

"Cool."

After cleaning himself off and putting on a fresh t shirt and a pair of sweatpants, Tom turned off the music and instead opened up the copy of Fight Club he'd downloaded to roughly the spot he remembered getting up to last time. Paused and ready to go, he sat on his bed to wait for you to come back before he opened the pizzas - though he was practically salivating at the smell.

"Should have put my leggings on anyway," you muttered the moment you pushed the door open, grabbing them off the floor and pulling them on before it had even clicked shut behind you. "Your house is freezing."

"Yeah, sorry - the heating's really shit," he chuckled apologetically as you peeled back the covers to sit beside him cross legged, pulling the duvet up over your knees and tucking it around your waist before pulling one of the pizza boxes into your lap.

"S'okay, I'll forgive you if I can swap you a chicken strip for a Twisted Dough Ball?"

"Deal."

By the time you had both finally admitted you were full and Tom mustered the energy to get up to put the leftovers in the fridge, you'd finished Fight Club and started Tropic Thunder. When he came back from the kitchen, a glass of water in each hand, he found you lying on your side and staring blankly at the TV, clearly not watching it at all.

"You alright there?" he asked, and he couldn't help but laugh when you nodded sleepily.

"Yep, I'm just...you know?" you mumbled, blinking furiously. "I'm awake, I'm watching."

"Okay, sure, I believe you. D'you want like, pyjamas or something?"

"Oh, uh..."

It was only when you paused that he realised he hadn't actually asked you if you were going to stay over, he'd just assumed you would be. It was only a fraction of a second though, and then you pushed yourself upright with a groan and leaned back against the wall.

"Yeah, please."

Nodding, Tom took out the same pyjamas he'd given you the time you stayed over after The Library, setting them on the bed in front of you as he climbed back in beside you.

"Thanks."

"No worries."

He tried to keep his eyes on the TV as you got changed by the side of his bed, but he'd be lying if he said he didn't sneak a glance and catch a glimpse of the side of your breast as you pulled the top over your head, your bra lying abandoned on the floor. You picked it up once you'd roughly folded your clothes, tossing them on top of your bag and coat before getting back into the bed.

"Thanks," you said again as you lay down beside him, smiling softly at him.

He just returned your smile, lifting his arm to wrap it around your shoulders. He was vaguely aware of his heartbeat in his throat as you lay your head down on his chest, but he tried his best to ignore it.

"So, what's going on here?"

"I thought you were paying attention?" he teased.

"I am! But just, you know, I missed a bit while I was getting changed."

Well aware that this was a blatant lie, Tom started to explain what was happening in the movie all the same. And, to your credit, you did hum and nod along like you were listening, and once he'd finished you did say "right okay", but he was about 99.999% sure you hadn't a clue what was going on and that you weren't even really conscious. He wondered then how long it was going to take for you to both actually watch all ten of the movies on your combined lists, but ultimately decided he didn't really mind if it took the rest of the year.

⋘NINE | ELEVEN ⋙

taglists:

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#tom holland x reader #tom holland x you #tom holland fic #tom holland fanfic #tom holland imagine #tom holland blurb #tom holland headcanon #tom holland smut #tom holland fluff

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indecisive-v · 3 years

Text

NINJAMUFFIN DOING ANOTHER AMA ON TWITTER, HERE'S MORE SHIT FOR YA! keep in mind i'm just sharing the funkin related stuff, though i am including WAAAAY more than what i shared before 👍 go check out ninja's twitter profile for questions about stuff like ritz! questions in blue, answers in orange. if yall don't wanna read everything i MIGHT make a version of this post where i replace the answers with my own summaries of em (and if the questions are long, those too)

and here's a link to the ama tweet itself! dunno if it's still goin

Q: I figure the answer will be yes but do you have more plans to implement more guest appearances from people in the newgrounds community into FNF? Or are you all gunna focus on OG lore and stuff going forward

A: for guest appearances, I think we have always seen it as getting a healthy mix of both. PERSONALLY I'd like to lean towards having more OG stuff than guest stuff, BUT it's all a matter of what other boys think of that as well. I'm not the sole person working on game!

Q: Are you gonna release the full FNF game or are you gonna be releasing week after week? Like, are you gonna release week 8 or are we gonna wait some years until The Full Ass Game comes out?

A: Release plan for FNF right now is a few more updates or whatev to the 'demo' we have out right now, and then a long silence of probably no updates whatsoever until the full game is done (which will likely be a few years). That's partly why we made kickstarter for game.

Q: Hey so like, how much will Fnf cost after it's finished? And when will you ask the supporters what they want the game on?

A: It's all subject to change, but right now it prob gonna be standard 15-25$ lil steam indie game.

We will ask Kickstarter pledgers and whatnot what they want the game on SUPER close to when its released, to keep options open if we get onto anything like a console people want.

Q: 1. how was your day

2. are you releasing a week 8 song early like week 7, or are you goin full lockdown

A: I am doing GOOD today, and I think recently I've been good in general.

up to the mood, but so far we doing good about not having anything leak or whatev, so I think it'd be fun to have update come out with people not knowing what to expect at all. Build dat intrigue

Q: Will fnf ever get official plushies?? Seems like an untapped market

A: FNF plushies will prob happen some point, we have a lot of current merch stuff on our plates already though! (Mostly kickstarter type stuff, shirts, pins, posters, and all the physical OST stuff) Its a lot to sort out, but in time more and more stuff will happen. We r jus 4 boys!

Q: did you ever expect your game to blow up as it did? what was your first reaction to seeing it become super popular

A: FNF never had a humble moment, literally day 1 before the prototype even came out, the vid on twitter had like 5K likes overnight. Then when ludum dare version came out, it got 5K likes again, like it wasnt just a fluke. Was crazy, and def felt like somethin was different wit FNF

Q: Do you plan on getting other people to come in to help with the music? That seems like a lot of work to dump on one person, what with the erect mode and whatnot.

I guess the question could apply to all aspects of development. Will you be bringing on more people to help?

A: We definitely are getting help from other people. We are always keeping an eye on people for various different things. In terms of programming, already I've gotten 2 people (MtH and Geokureli) to help with certain Week 7 stuff (charting/polish, and loading stuff). Shit like dat

Q: Oh, also, will the Steam version be Workshop compatible? That'd really help streamline the process of downloading mods.

A: Steam version of FNF will likely NOT be Steam workshop compatible, because we want all the mods to NOT be spread out through different places. There WILL be modding support that is as streamlined as Steam workshop though. Mainly for non-steam versions of the game!

Q: Are there any chances that the game will have a physical release? Also any updates on a switch port? I remember one of you guys talking/joking about it.

A: Not impossible for FNF to get a physical release. We would want to see how far we could go with it though. I think it'd be super easy to do something wit people like LimitedRun games or whatev, but I think stuff like that can only go so far. I wanna see Funkin in mf Walmart!!!!!!

not that LimitedRun isn't going to be an option! Just we consider and pursue many different things! FNF release is years away, so we have time to think about everything. Whole mindset can be different just a few months from now.

Q: Out of curiosity, how are you dealing with all the popularity? It blew up so fast id barely be able to handle it if I was in your shoes.

A: The only way I've been able to handle it is having the other boys on the crew and being able to talk to them about all the overwhelmingness.

Part of it feels very lonesome, feels like NO ONE can come close to comprehending exactly how I'm feeling, except them. also other PALS!!!

Q: Do you own any of the bootleg FNF merchandise? Like any bootleg plushies or anything?

A: i dont, i genuinely think they r a waste of money, and I know any bootleg shit that gets made, we can prob go about and make it, and make it 100x cooler because we actually put effort into shit. bootleg shit just in it for the coin, so they aint gettin that from me

Q: How did you go about getting in contact with sr pelo for skid and pumps vocals?

A: Pelo i think was familiar and pals wit PhantomArcade a bit thru various Newgrounds things and collabs and whatnot.

pelo retweeted the first OG FNF posts first ever, and brought a LOT of attention to it. to pay him back, we put skid and pump in game! ask dave for more info prob

Q: what's the plan for having the full ass game open source if it's gonna cost money? couldn't people just download the source and compile the game for free?

A: when FNF is fully released, the full source code will be released as well.

the game will be DRM free so it will be way easier for people to redistribute the released/offical .exe instead of compiling it, so that's not the issue anyways. people will pay for things if they like it

Q: What are the chances of it getting on consoles like switch or Playstation, ps5 would definitely be my preferred way to play

A: it'd be a matter of hiring someone to build out backend stuff for those specific consoles. someone who knows their way around all the wacky code stuff, AND knows console hardware stuff. Then its just a matter of hittin up those console manufacturers (Sony, Microsoft, or Nintendo)

the CLOSEST one is SWITCH. pretty much all of that backend is already made, so it just a matter of gettin all that access and shit.

i think in any case though, there's a lot of NDA stuff required, i dunno how much we'd be able to talk about it even IF we get that stuf sorted

Q: any ideas of releasing it on epic store or another platform?

A: Right now, the only thing that is 100% confirmed and WILL happen is a Steam version, itchio version, and mobile versions on respective app stores. Other storefronts aren't out of the picture though, but we don't want to spread ourselves too thin with it.

Q: Will you continue using HaxeFlixel to make the rest of FNF?

A: yes, because it is what I'm the most technically proficient in, and generally is VERY flexible. just a matter of ME becoming a better coder. It's ALL open source, so if I need something done a certain way, either I can do it, or we can hire someone to do it.

Q: have you seen game theory's videos on your game yet and if so, what do you think about them? (not talking about his predictions because i dont want spoilers. i like mystery)

A: it is always good silly fun to watch the Game Theory vids about Funkin with some pals, and see what matpat thinks of the game. i lov the vids, but wish he used my face less! Or at least used a cuter pic of me like this one!!

Q: Ok so: What does the future of FNF look like to you?

A: future of FNF is a rhythm game that not only exceeds every expectation that people have of it, but subverts most expectations and conventions as well.

Q: Do you plan on retouching on older weeks once the game is fully out? Like reanimating sprites, redoing some charting, updating the background, etc

A: retouching and probably overhauling certain aspects is almost definitely gonna happen. Everything is fluid and can be changed (and should be changed when necessary). i dont think anything should be too attached to, especially this early on in development

Q: I honestly do not care if the answer to this is vague as hell to keep surprises and shit lol but… Since Week 7 was the closest we’ll get to a playable girlfriend (still bf controlling tho), do you have plans to make girlfriend playable in spin-off things or just freeplay?

A: wouldnt be out of the picture for a playable GF, i don't think we've had some hard thing AGAINST it. just a matter of what we want out of the game, and what sort of story or whatev we could do with that concept

Q: How do BF and GF manage to meet famous newgrounds characters (such as pico, tankman and the others to come) like is this all in one universe/ timeline or are they being brought in?

A: i think they are all just there existing. i think there's a lot of wacky things in other media that try to justify crossovers, like MULTIVERSE bullshit or TIMELINE shit, but i dunno, its like subspace emissary. Captain Falcon and Olimar from Pikmin just hang out. Shit like dat

disclaimer that all lore shit is in phantomarcade head pretty much and maybe there is wacky dimensions or somethin

Q: Will the game have dlc?

A: its not too unlikely that we'd have expansions of some sort, but i mean right now we plan on packing in as much as we can into base game, and trying to make that as pure as possible.

if there is ANY dlc, i would personally want it to be 100% free updates

Q: How did you meet Phantom Arcade, Kawai Sprite, and EvilSker? And what do you think about the community and its controversies?

A: me and phantomarcade been fukin around NG for years so years and years ago we naturally crossed paths and became pals

about 2 years ago i found kawaisprites music on NG, and started talkin wit him, made Ritz wit him and we fell in lov

and evilsk8r i met cuz of FNF!!!

quik elaborate on evilsk8r, wanted artist for gamejam FNF was for (ludum dare), and OG person i asked wasnt available, so he referred me to evilsk8r, who I have never met or talked to before ever.

#friday night funkin #fnf #fridaynightfunkin

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missguomeiyun · 3 years

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Homecookings [Apr. ed]

Hi friends~

Due to the home-cation during the 1st little bit of April, I actually had time to do more ‘extensive’ cooking/posts so the content in this post will be quite limited...

But here we go!

Good ol’ spaghetti + PC brand flatbread (the chicken one that I didn’t enjoy......)

This was an interesting snack. Have you tried shrimp crackers by Nongshim brand? This had similar vibes to that but thinner chips & a diff ‘taste’ bcos it’s fish-flavoured haha I got a bag for myself, & also gave a bag to the nieces so try. They did not like this! I thought it was okay; not my favourite but I finished it all anyway. It was my Penthouse snack :P

I don’t know why I thought this package of zucchinis was cute. ..

I have deonjang (Korean soy bean paste) soup with the zucchini, tofu, imitation lobster meat, & underneath that, there was also some napa cabbage. To add some extra flavour, I added gochu powder & some salted shrimp sauce.

Another zucchini in soup lunch.. . no, I’m not on a diet haha I actually had more of this soup in my pot; I just scooped out this much for the photo. For this soup, I had zucchini, tofu, imitation lobster meat as well as fish cake. I personally liked this one better than the previous. Some ppl may not like it bcos of the added fish cakes, making the soup “fishy” but I am a huge fan of the fish cakes! Paired it with some radish & injeolmi!

[where my injeolmi came from] This was from the small bakery section at the U of A location of Hmart. I haven’t had injeolmi for such a longgggg time.

Breakfast after a long stretch >.< I needed to reward myself haha

Jjajang-ddeokbokki. Instead of the traditional spicy version of ddeokbokki, I’ve been making this more often nowadays (aka the black bean sauce version). This has become one of my regular lunches bcos I’ve figured out a way to cook this so that when I microwave it the next day, the rice cakes are still chewy (not soaked/soggy). I have tried bringing the regular spicy ddeokbokki for lunch before & for some reason, it just. .. never worked out the way I wanted it to be. I’ve tried diff brands of rice cakes etc... I’ve experimented with it a handful of times. However, it seems to work with the black bean sauce o_O I’m not sure why. This is the day-off lunch version but basically if I’m making some for work lunch the next day, I actually undercook the rice cakes & save the extra sauce in a separate container. Before I head out to work, I pour the sauce into my rice cake-containing container (to prevent overnight soaking). & while I’m at work, I heat it up like.. . hardcore! For like 3mins... (bcos some microwaves at work are old & not very ‘strong’). The rice cakes are bouncy & while it’s being microwaved, they actually take up some of the liquid/sauce! SUCCESS!!!

Another drama snack~ This was my snack while I was watching the Kdrama “Cheat On Me, If You Can.” Not as good as Penthouse but I was also really into it & finished it in a few days. This snack was interesting- while the flavour was meh, I was actually in love with the shape/texture. It was rotini-shaped, & the texture was puffy!

Beef seasoning~

Yes, more zucchini. .. I legit ate all 3 by myself over the span of 4-5 days haha oh no, my mom used about half in a stir-fry one evening so I guess I ate 2.5 zucchinis. Anyway, I used the above beef seasoning for this soup that consisted of zucchini, napa cabbage, regular green cabbage, minute amount of onion. Yes, it was vegetarian.

Laksa vermicelli noodles. YES MORE ZUCCHINI! I swear this is the last one lol but I needed to use it up bcos prior to cracking open the saran wrap/packaging, it was actually sitting in the fridge for almost a week already so I needed to use it all up like fast! Anywho, I threw away the package of laksa soup base that I used here but it was by the Asian Home Gourmet brand. I used the entire package, diluted with half:half chicken broth & water for my soup. It was delicious! For toppings, I had my zucchini, napa cabbage, baby clams & a variety of fish balls.

This was interesting. I will likely make this again NOT bcos it was particularly “tasty”, but iuno. .. the combo of textures was just great! I had buttered toast, a single layer of yellow radish, mashed up imitation lobster meat (did not add anything to it), & then furikake. It was like crunchy & soft, & just, overall, a burst of diff flavours in one bite!

Korean fried chicken by MEEEEEEE~ I have gotten rid of the double-frying practice bcos it takes too long & too much effort. Now I do the wet-dry batter method, & the outcome is equally as crispy! ^^

If we buy these frozen lasagnas, it’s always the PC brand, but we have this Western Family brand this time.

Looks like this... o_O wasn’t impressed.. . Why is there so much ice!?

I don’t have a finished photo bcos it was so sad... why?

I used microwave method, & . .. it turned out to be such a big mess =( it become so liquid-y & everything was just. .. melted down. I think it was bcos of the water content, plus the extra ice that dripped onto the pasta. Anyway, flavour was good but nothing crazy! Will be sticking to the PC brand :P

My version of mapo-tofu. I have satay sauce + bulgogi sauce, diced green cabbage, eggplant & tofu! Topped with a gochu powder~ YUM!

& now I wanna talk about my vaccine with you all~ if you’re not interested, check out my Etsy shop here instead! https://www.etsy.com/shop/OneOfAKo

Okay, so my vaccine story.. .

1st of all, a little bit of background in regards to my province’s C*vid situation .. . long story short, it’s NOT good. To be fair, I’m in-and-out of tuning in to the daily updates; I look once every few days &. .. yeah, it’s just NOT good! We are hitting record numbers; surpassing the worst numbers in the 2nd wave.. . I don’t get it >.< I’m not sure why the numbers are so high despite ppl are getting vaccinated *shrugs* but I think everyone should go get vaccinated if you are eligible to!

Right now, in this province, there are 2 routes of getting vaccinated: select pharmacies & via provincial health services.

When I was eligible to book (I’m in health care but not front line so I just got the eligibility this month!), I went thru the pharmacy options that were closest to me. Why? Bcos it was convenient by location. I read into it a little more, & realized that I’ll be placed on a general waiting list. I ended up signing myself up for 1 pharmacy, where the location was TBD until they actually confirm my appointment, which they say, could be weeks to months down the line! O_O In any case, I just left it as is bcos there was no way to cancel being on the wait list.

In the meantime, immediately after I did the pharmacy registration, I went on the AHS website. Did the questionnaire & got the ‘final page’, where they gave a date/time option with a 10minute timer running so you have 10 minutes to finalize your booking. Except when I hit “confirm”, the next page said, “this time has been taken”. So I had to go thru the whole process again. And again. I clicked the “confirm” 3 times, & finally got a date/time for my vaccination! YAY!

Went to my vaccination appointment ~10mins before my scheduled time. There was a "greeting” table, where I was required to change into a new (provided) medical mask. Then I was instructed to line up for the sign-in table, where the staff at the desk asked for my 2 pieces of ID. I was also given the vaccination record form. After that, I went into another line to actually enter the vaccination room. At my location, it was a small-ish room with about 10 vaccine administrators. There was a girl who was monitoring the “ppl flow” from the line to the vaccination station. A little more info was given by my administrator, & a final “do you want to get the vaccine today?”. The shot itself was short, & to me, painless. Then everyone had to move to a waiting room, where we had to wait around for 15mins to make sure we don’t get an allergic reaction. This room was the PROBLEM! It was SO small & spaces between chairs was only about a meter! It was stuffy in the mask AND in the room. I could FEEL it. It was very bad! & worse of all, the number of ppl who got their vaccines exceeded the number of ppl exiting the room, so when I was there in a chair, there were ppl standing along the wall & the room got even more crowded. This part was the worse part of the experience =/ 15mins done, & I was able to leave!

So yeah, glad to have the privilege to be vaccinated (about time!), but I don’t know why our numbers keep climbing >.< Cooperate, ppl!!!

#homemade #homecooking #food #cooking #cook #i cook #healthy

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cruddyborderlandstheories · 4 years

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this DLC has me FUCKED UP and i keep screaming

spoilers for Bounty of Blood under the cut, keep reading at ur own peril. Also some Guardian Takedown spoilers for anyone who hasn’t beat it yet

tl;dr: a comparison between something taken from BL2 and a thing taken from Bounty of Blood. more spoilery tl;dr below the cut.

also the siren thing is not spoilers so i’ll share it here for anyone curious, it’s just this: siren tattoos are blue but when lily absorbs eridium in 2, they turn pinkish/purple. just like how vaults do from bl1 to bl2. they’re white/blue in bl1, then purple-pink in bl2 (and tps), y’know, after Eridium begins erupting from the ground. just a neat little detail i noticed that im not entirely sure was intentional but im gonna believe it is.

tl;dr: Gythian Blood = Core and the Ruiner is of Eridian Origin even tho everyone in the DLC likes to say it was created with Jakobs’ bioengineering. disclaimer: idk if I’ve found every hidden ECHO so I may be missing a few things but I have done every side quest and took ample screenshots of all important dialogue in the DLC : )

“man i just sat here for like 15 minutes staring at my keyboard mentally comparing core and eridium like the dumb bitch i am.

it's not like we can do an actual comparison because we have no idea what the natural fauna of gehenna was like before jakobs came and mutated everything with core unlike pandora where we know what skags and rakk and shit were like BEFORE the eridium crust erupted.

altho!!! there's a neat comparison between joey ultraviolet and rose. like obviously he wasn't getting tattoos and was just doing lines of crushed up eridium but the point stands they both have glowy eyes and unique powers so i don't necessarily think this means rose is a siren just because she has magic powers especially when we know she got the whistling passed down to her from her grandmother.

especially because we've never seen a siren interact with core before. altho that leaves the question we have seen core tattoos now what are eridium tattoos like? actually rose's tattoos were on her right arm obviously she isn't a siren as we know them right now (I saw a post on reddit where people thought rose was a siren)

of course that brings up the point perhaps siren tattoos ARE eridium tattoos. but then we hear the general's log about how the devil riders were tattooing a man with core and blood so obviously they're not ‘naturally’ occurring unlike siren tattoos. so odds are they're probably not equivalents but something interesting i thought of while thinking about this is how well siren tattoos compare to the Vaults from borderlands 1 and borderlands 2″

anyway. this is all ive been thinking about. yes yes i know guardian takedown post but! >:( im still salty even tho this update has been lovely (outside of Blane not getting his correct damage scaling ‘till today......). so i’ll do that at my own damn pace. now let me elaborate so i can sleep at night lmao

Eridium

refinement produces slag, which weakens people and can mutate things

has mutating properties, mostly with imbuing elements into shit- possibly causes insanity

seems to be connected to another dimension, likely the one the Eridians are from

Core

has a secondary form of Infused Core

has mutating properties, mostly regarding a thing’s body and mind

apparently radioactive

there are some things i wanna note

1) People throughout the DLC say the Ruiner was created by the Jakobs corp (the company) thru bio-engineering but I’m 99% sure that’s not true. The paperwork seems to me like they found the egg somewhere on Gehenna and decided to roll and experiment with it like all corporations do when they find weird alien shit. so maybe they experimented with whatever was inside the egg, but I don’t think they actually created it entirely

“Excavated from [REDACTED] ... Local legends speaks of a [REDACTED]. This theory is not endorsed by our research personnel.

2) The Ruiner’s design reminds me a lot of the Warrior.

3) Core immediately reminded me of Gythian Blood from Guns Love and Tentacles and I don’t think that’s coincidence to have 2 back-to-back DLCs where the big bad is focused on green death juice. I think Gythian Blood and Core are of the same stuffs.

4) Therefore, I think the Ruiner is (mostly) of Eridian origin (if you haven’t already guessed).

This gives us an amazing look into how the Eridians actually create their beasts!!! And I’m so happy they showed us this.

(side note, Interitus Regina (the long name for Ruiner) literally means Destruction Queen and I think that’s beautiful <3)

i mean the idea that they plunge them from orbit to create an explosion similar to a nuke is fucking horrifying (but holy shit I love it so much ahhh it’s so cool!!!!)

the one side line from Oletta about how the company couldn’t control the Ruiner deffo makes me double down on this theory. I’m not entirely sure how Rose’s grandma knew about the whistling (I don’t think I’ve found every echo log in that area YET), but I would bet it was part of the testing given how many fuckin’ tape players they have throughout the facility. The Warrior was controlled by verbal commands via Jack, so it’s possible that the Ruiner was intended to be controlled similarly, but Jakobs intervention (or something like the way Rose hatched it) fucked it up.

now we know the Warrior was created to protect the Vault of the Destroyer (hmm.) so what the heck was the Ruiner created for? Ruiner is a name given to it by Jakobs/the people of Gehenna so we can’t really assume, but then again the monster names are pretty apt in this series even tho they probably technically shouldn’t be.

it was only an egg, so maybe it was another test of Core? A Vault Monster incubating until it was ready to protecc and attacc but was never hatched because the Eridians ‘sacrificed’ themselves before it could? (I’m still not convinced the Eridians are the good guys. Listen. LISTEN. The guardian takedown is something to think about, BUT it doesn’t disprove that theory and I’ll stand by it because I 100% trust the Overseer more than bitchpants mcgee over here who thinks he’s soooo special for no reason fuck you and your dumb ‘I did what the Watcher could not’ bull you haven’t done shit.) ok sorry im done he just angers me. stupid guardian man. your whip is stupid and you should feel bad. oh also I totally called us actually being Guardians thru Guardian Rank before the game came out aha yeah.

I definitely think Gythian was a test/use of Core from the Eridians. We see in Bounty of Blood that core seems to mutate more the physical (and occasionally mental) parts of people, like with the crew challenges u do for Juno with all the weird hybrid people and whatnot. Gythian had the whole ‘the heart still beats’ thing going on (which is definitely a physical mutation if i’ve ever seen one), plus the whole, you know, mind control and shit. Which is p similar to what the menta gnats can do when charged with Infused Core. And keep in mind in BLaT we see DAHL notes on what happens to test subjects when injected with Gythian Blood. They mutated physically and went insane.

What im saying is Sirens and Eridium and Elements are connected, so what does Core equal? body/mind sure but are there unique creatures for core (yes holy shit I’m not talking about h2o au for once and FINALLY they gave us a canon name for the green stuff!!!). If not, I’d love to see a Siren interact with Core to see what it does to them. seriously why hasn’t tannis interrupted us yet. horrible excuse for a science lover (kidding kidding, I love her). I’d also really love a fuller rundown on what the hell Rose’s powers were. Because the whistling thing seemed to just be her grandma’s thingie passed down to her from her mom

but the core stuff

her gun seems to be infused with it. So did her sword thing. I didn’t really get a good look at it i was too busy trying to see thru my blurry tears of LOVE for this DLC.

Strangely while her tattoos are (mostly) green I actually don’t know if they’re core infused bc look at this

n look back at hers. hers aren’t very lime.

anyway

her eyes

I’d love to know if the core gives her immediate future sight or just increased perception or reaction times. there’s a huge difference but she seemed to be able to shoot the gun outta the sheriff’s hand near immediately and it seems kinda implied its because of the core (or at least because her eyes are glowing green)

there’s a possibility she has some unique core powers/possibly implants because of her relations to the project in the first place, or as leader of the devil riders after looting the facility. it’s really hard to say without more info and like i said im not sure if i missed an ECHO or two or not regarding her backstory :(

Her hair is also green which I just noticed. Maybe she has core powers bc her grandmother got suuuuuuuuper irradiated/influenced working on project horizons and it passed down thru her n Rose’s mom, to Rose. Tannis does have a line about Sirens having unique hair colors and, if Sirens are linked to Eridium, perhaps those linked to Core also have unique hair color. Could also explain why only Rose seems to have those whistling powers. That said we don’t really see anyone else trying that whistling thing out afaik and idk if it was, like, a special ability or a certain tone/ditty or w h a t.

i know being vague with everything gives them more creative freedom to create amazing characters and scenarios, but dammit I want A N S W E R S.

All THAT said man I’m so glad magic is real in the borderlands universe. oh, sorry, “magic”. It’s magic. Science it, tannis, I dare you. either way, I win. Either it’s magic and H2O AU is canon, or it’s science and I finally get my goddamn answers. Hey gearbox can you make a book just explaining all the science and eridian stuff. please. I’d love you forever. please. pleaheheheheaaasseee it’s all i’ve ever wanted.

oh also can i just say, suuuper disappointed we didn’t learn anything about anshin. Really wish non-fan favorite corporations would get the spotlight/lore for once. Like, I like Jakobs as much as the next guy, and I get WHY they did it (can’t have a corporation looking too good!!!) but they now have 3 DLCs (Jakobs Cove, GLaT, and Bounty of Blood) and also a hefty chunk of the main game. Like... we all know Jakobs fuckin sucks, look at what they did on Pandora. I really just want info on a medical corporation 😭 I have to do everything my damn s e l f. but SERIOUSLY IMAGINE the possibilities that could come from a medical corp getting its hands on eridian tech. like, yeah obviously the weapons corps are gonna use it for weaponry and stuff BUT WOULDN’T THE MEDICAL CORPS MUTATING PEOPLE MAKE MORE SENSE??? ldfhgldfshg I have to do everything my damn self...

anyway all that aside, this is definitely by favorite borderlands dlc by a LONG shot. Nothing comes close. Ahhh the lore, the nuclear aspect, the a e s t h e t i c (seriously, have I mentioned how much I adore Trigun???), the art, the music, the cryoslinger, the fact I can bust out going beeEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAans like Ray Chase at any time and it will MAKE SENSE. I love all of it.

oh, also, Rose is totally not dead. C’mon, they couldn’t find her body. She pulled a Lilith. “Are you sure she didn’t just suffer a wound that LOOKS fatal, only for her to come back in a blockbuster sequel...?” is a line from mr Jones himself (the movie guy)

I just hope when she comes back she gets to meet Captain Scarlett. I’d love to watch their interactions plus pirates and or ninjas. That’s 2 DLC villains now that have vanished without a trace. And I like Captain Scarlett way more than Rose (seriously I spent the entire beginning of the DLC complaining about how her voice bothered me- I was so happy she was a villain, I was hoping that was the case).

oh yeah, reminder, the people of vestige were living next to highly radioactive egg for likely years. i feel really bad for them :(

also!!!

this made me smile

#im tired #good night #bl3 #borderlands #borderlands spoilers #spoilers #bl3 spoilers #borderlands 3 spoilers #bounty of blood #bounty of blood spoilers #dlc3 #dlc3 spoilers #dlc 3 #dlc 3 spoilers #i don't want to spoil anybody please lemme know if there's any tags i missed!!!!

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stillwithkoo · 5 years

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She's Back For You 1.

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader, * x reader?

Genre: angst, fluff, e2l, smutty themes, future smut, hot & angry jungkook

Summary; You're back, and Jungkook has never been happier, but you'll make him realize soon enough that his happiness isn't forever.

pls don't repost my work anywhere ty!

a/n: also mayhaps i'll add links later or nah as i update. or u can just search for it thru my blog. I can also rb the link under the replies so yea. enjoy reading!♡♡♡

☆~☆~☆~

He was almost drifting to sleep when he got a text from jimin.

jimin: OPEN YOUR DOOR NOW. TRUST ME YOU'D WANT TO.

It read. He wondered why jimin was forcing him to open his door. He took out his airpods and he could hear someone still knocking on his door, so he decided to get up and open it to get done with it.

"Hyung what the hell did u-" His words were cut off because he didn't expect the person who would show up at his door, it was the person he'd been waiting for all this time. The reason for his heartache and euphoria. He couldn't believe it. Was it really you? you're here alive and well- and you came back for him? "y/n..."

"Jungkook, It's been awhile." He immediately put his arms around you, hugging you so tight it almost hurt. He didn't even realize he was crying, either it was from overwhelming joy or sadness he didn't care. "Baby- is it really you? I'm not dreaming right? You're alive...and you came back for me. I missed you so much- it hurt so much when you left me. Baby don't ever leave me again." He said, still holding you tightly. Until he grabbed your face and kissed you so longingly and passionately, you were quite taken aback.

You broke the kiss first because you had to breathe, and jungkook stopped too since he realized you weren't really responding to his kisses that much. He wondered if you missed him a lot too? "Baby are you okay? maybe you're still tired- what happened to you anyway? let's get inside and you can tell me if you're ready. I wanna know," he told you and held your hand as you went inside his room. His room was quite messy, but with all the shit that happened you weren't surprised anymore.

You both sat down on his bed and you spoke first answering his questions, "I'm okay Kook. Sorry I'm just a bit disoriented, because of all that's happened- and I just wanted to see you first. Can I tell you what happened some other time? The past doesn't really matter anyway, cos I'm here now and I really just wanna be with you." You looked at him like you were pleading, so he decided you can tell him the story another time. You were right anyway, what's important is that you're here now. "Sure baby, don't pressure yourself. You can tell me about it tom. Have you eaten already? I can cook for you if you like." He offered, while playing with your hands.

Though you were a bit hungry, you didn't wanna go and face the other people outside. Jungkook's hyungs might be in the kitchen or at the dinner table and you weren't ready to face them yet. "Uh yeah i have-thanks though but can we just sleep? I'm a little tired-" You lie.

"Oh. Okay love, if that's what you want." You didn't even ask him if he ate, maybe you were just really tired he thought.

You woke up in the middle of the night because of your stomach grumbling, maybe you should have eaten something before you came here. Maybe you could've if he didn't annoy you to hurry up and show up to Jungkook already. There were empty ramen cups beside Jungkook's bed, maybe he went to get some food while you were asleep but didn't want to wake you up. Speaking of Jungkook, he was still asleep so it was the perfect time to get out and call someone. You decided to get some food while you're at it too.

Your phone rang when you were just about to call that person. "Hello? Great timing, I was just about to call you. Ofc I'm inside now, It's going okay so far- except his pda is annoying tf out of me." You spoke to the other person on the line in a hushed voice. "That's good then, but remember okay isn't enough y/n. It might be annoying right now, but you'll have to get used to it. You're his girlfriend after all, stick to the plan and everything might just work out in the end."

he then added, "And besides, you shouldn't be getting uncomfortable with a little touching and kissing baby, didn't I train and teach you that enough?" He didn't have to remind you of that, it just made you flustered. "Ok. I get it- he might wake up soon and look for me. I'll just call you when I have an update." You looked behind you, and you were glad there was no one in sight.

"Of course you will and i'll call you. Focus on your task. Don't forget who the enemy is, love. Goodluck." He then ended the call.

You went back to Jungkook's room and noticed he was awake. You just hoped he doesn't suspect anything. "Baby, you're up? I just went to eat some snacks. I got hungry." You told him as you got back in bed.

"Yeah, I noticed you were gone so I got worried. What took you so long?" He asked, coming closer to snuggle you and hold you tightly to his side. "I was looking for snacks that'd suit my appetite, I'm feeling picky today." Was your curt reply. "Hmm. Is that why you're being cold to me? Is it the time of the month-" "No- I mean yes. Maybe It's gonna start soon so- I'm being moody." You said and maybe it wasn't a lie, your period hadn't come yet. Though you knew there were other reasons why you were acting like this.

"Aw baby, you know I'll take care of you right? I'll do anything to make you feel better." He then proceeded to give sensual kisses to your neck and collarbone, but when he was about to take your dress off you stopped him. "I think we should go back to sleep Kook." You said awkwardly. He pouted and looked disappointed. "Did you not miss me y/n? Cos i think I stated it clearly that i missed you a lot- and yet it feels like you didn't miss me at all."

"That's not true Kook, I missed you a lot too. There's just things that are bothering me right now- and I'm not feeling in the mood to be touchy and all." You sighed, you really should stop doing things that would make him question you. "Well, when are you gonna be in the mood then?" Surprisingly his tone wasn't that angry anymore, he talked like he was pouting. Which was true since he was indeed pouting. "Idk kook, maybe tom?"

"You keep saying tom. you know? but fine- I trust you and I'll wait for you. And if there's things that are bothering you- you know you can tell me right? because I wanna know and because I care about you. Always remember that love." He told you and he kissed your forehead, it was becoming quite hard not to be affected by what he was saying, but then you remembered what happened and why you had to do this anyway. "I know. Thanks Kook- for everything." You said and you meant it.

♡

Thankies sm for reading! Which member do you think called y/n? ;) I'd love to hear your theories/positive comments so dun be shy to send me an ask :))

#jungkook smut #bts smut #jungkook fic #jeon jungkook #jungkook imagines #jungkook scenarios #jungkook angst #bts imagines #bts scenarios #jungkook fluff #jungkook fanfic #jungkook x reader #ot7 #bts persona #my works #sbfy: ch.1 #i'll edit this later cos im lazy as always #bts fanfic #bts x reader

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custer-mp3 · 4 years

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long-ass general life update for you nosy bitches // tw: men, my bad legs

so boring to say i’m settling in but i am, i just wish there was something better to call it

there was somebody camped out in the back of the park across from our house down by the railroad tracks, on what we think is technically railroad property, and the parks department came today and tried to haul their shit away without a police order cuz “it’s just trash” no dude it’s a tent that’s someone’s home you leave it the fuck alone so Agatha screamed at them until they went away but then the cops came by & tagged it so now they have 3 days to move or the parks department’s allowed to come back & take their shit away

when we were trying to figure out whose site it so so we could reach out to them thru the drop-in center we noticed the tent was locked but had been cut open and the rain fly was ripped off and Agatha says it’s probably fine but it looked like somebody rolled their shit hella bad & i’m just worried about whoever it is, it looked like multiple people (or at least a guy and a girl) and i hope they’re okay like. physically

thanksgiving weekend launched me into the flare of the century i’m still not recovered from. i dared unpack my boxes of books yesterday (which were all small!! 6 free USPS boxes!!) and my knees had just. Had It. from that 20 minutes of activity. my wrists and elbows are flaring rly bad rn too & i had to buy ankle braces cuz my Achilles was already super fucked up from moving & like. whole body hurts.

i was limping around super bad at work--like unable to actually walk, just kinda toddling around in slow-mo if they needed me to move somewhere--and my manager made fun of me to my face IMITATING MY LIMP ON BLACK FRIDAY when i requested a break then my ASM and tenured keyholder ALSO made fun of me on Hell Saturday and i’m going to burn the entire store down

marina says report them to HR but that’s not very anarchist of me and i just don’t care enough to ruin their lives cuz it’s a temp job anyway and i can make it thru the holiday surely but it’s also like. i am the most able-bodied disabled person i know. i get more shit done in a day with 2 nonfunctional legs and fucked up arms and guts that are trying to escape my body and The Brain Fog TM than most people in full health do. if you’re being this awful to ME to my fkn FACE, ON THE CLOCK, how awful are you to “““actually disabled”““ ppl like out in the world on your free time

i just hate that there are no buses on sundays, no buses after 7, and i keep getting put on these dumb fucking late closes that mean either paying $15 for an Uber or walking the 3 miles home in the dark and the cold and some days i just physically Cannot with my Body and have to pay for the Uber which sucks ass cuz i’m making barely above federal minimum wage again

but i’ve been walking dogs and stuff with Kara. she’s got a hot friend who saw the picture of my halloween costume she threw in the groupchat and apparently thinks i’m cute and has been inquiring about my existence ever since so she asked me if she could give him my number and like sure bro i’ve met this dude exactly once AND I DIDN’T HAVE EYEBROWS ON AND WAS STANDING THERE RUBBING MY EYEBROW STUBBLE IN MY OVERSIZED SLIPKNOT HOODIE AND PAJAMA PANTS but i would like him to throw me thru a brick wall so sure but then he tEXTED ME and we set up a hangout which was supposed to just be coffee but turned into a whole-ass actual lunch date which like. worm. and made out in my living room cuz why not.

yesterday we hung out again (the coffee i was promised) and walked dogs with Kara in the cemetery and went to Kinko’s and the sketchy Halloween store that’s still open in fkn December and also made out, and then he was like “we should have an Actual Date For Real People” and i was like mfkr what?!?????? is that not???? no??????????????

so that occurred t o d a y cuz you can’t call me anything but efficient and spoiler alert, it was NOT a Real People Date, it was a fkn punk shitbag date, we definitely smashed then cuddled and tried to get Parsnip to interact with the other cat in a peaceful fashion and listened to Ministry and helped Agatha with the camp/park service situation and dealt with the cops when they showed up and had the aUDAciTY to park in front of our house to pull that shit then ran errands and cuddled and went to a Food Not Bombs meeting like. mfkr. that aint a date. that’s hanging out. how. is the prior 2 things with designated start times and wearing Nice Shirts and Going In Public Together Solo and shit not dates but tODaY was a date. fkn. WHAT

anyway he’s simple and sweet and hilarious and pro-SW anarcho communist and insanely hot and self-deprecating and i want to climb him like a tree but he too is divorced once over and we’ve Talked about it & it’s made me feel Better about my own shit & like. i want him to throw me through a brick wall and buy me food and leave me alone, and he’s in a non-monogamous relationship with one of Kara’s friends and his partner’s like “bro u need to date other ppl so i don’t feel bad” and y’know, that’s fuckin stellar imo. for me.

like what this whole fkn Ordeal has made me realize is i actually hate being in capital-R-Relationships. i do NOT want the pressure of being somebody’s whole world, i do not want the EXPECTATION of being solely responsible for somebody’s emotional happiness and well-being, i just wanna be friends with people and hang out and make art and occasionally make out and otherwise be left alone to do my own thing so this is like. rad as fuck. that this just sorta fell into my lap fully-formed and i didn’t have to do a bunch of screening and dealing with fuckboys and everything i was dreading abt y’know. finding someone to make out with in the midwest

and it was all because of my dumbass pun-based nu-metal halloween costume, which is the best thing that’s happened to me in decades, so. thank u jonathan davis

but i’m making friends--mostly thru Kara, but the other fellow new KH at work is the oldest person in the store (older than me by a couple years) and ALSO super into all things manson-adjacent and ALSO super queer and everything and has given me a ride home a couple times and i love her so maybe we’ll end up being friends in the long run too--and like living with Kara’s been good cuz there are always people around and she doesn’t mind me inviting myself on stuff sometimes so

there’s some sort of Krampus parade thing this Saturday in which for $2 you can actually be beaten with sticks and the squad’s going to that and we’re all doing FNB on Sunday and i know aforementioned dude is gonna be there but also so is his partner so like. that’ll be Inch Resting. but. we’ll survive. ‘we’ meaning me.

idk if it’s some sort of fucked up coping mechanism from coming dead last in my own monogamous relationships for uhhhhhhhhhhhh my entire fucking life but y’know. i kinda just feel whatever abt it!! like cool!! there is the dude i am fast friends with and def have a mutual crush on and am also currently fucking! and there’s the person he’s been dating for 3.5 years and owns a house with, and they’re a Thing!! and idk where i fit and what the vibe’ll be idk if the partner’s other ppl are gonna be there too so it’ll be weird fr all of us or it’s just me and like honestly how do y’all NAVIGATE i just don’t wanna make fkn heart eyes at the wrong time or NOT make heart eyes at the wrong time U FEEL ME

but also y’know what, whatever, fine. i’m like the least possessive person in the universe. like. i like that it’s all out in the open and people aren’t running around on me or anybody else. can’t believe this is my life, honestly. idk if the squad was conspiring on this or what cuz kara has terminal Nice Person disease but. good job fam.

i was in a real dark place this time last week and it only got worse over Hell Weekend, like. feeling directionless / unmotivated / isolated / lonely / traumatized / failure. it’s really been hitting me hard that i’m [redacted] years old & getting d*vorced & back in a punk house in a city i’d never set foot in before & working the shittiest shit job in the history of shit jobs and i’m never gonna see this person that was my best friend for so long again (cuz, y’know, i know i don’t talk abt the Private Life on here very often/in very concrete terms ~~this post being the exception~~ but. we were Best Friends. for a very long time) & i’m officially losing this friendship that meant so much to me and does mean so much to me, because i do care about him as a friend. like. fuck him as a spouse, he’s terrible at that, but as a friend i don’t want to see him struggling. which is bullshit. cuz he was abusing me and my life was a living goddamn hell in VA. but it’s hard to let go of the basis of the whole goddamn Ordeal to start with, and it’s hard to reconcile My Friend Whomst I Adore with My Ex-Husband Who Triggers Me On Purpose & Reads My Instagram Messages & Has Been Blackout Drunk For Months & Won’t Let Me Have Space Even In My Own Office, and it’s hard cuz the only people i know who’ve gone through something like this are dead. and all of that’s hitting at once. and i can put up with a lot of shit but i cannot put up with feeling like a failure within myself. and shit was truly fucking bleak.

so the whole social life thing just came at a good time y’know & even if things otherwise aren’t going the way i want there’s at least one good spot in my life. i got friends, i’m getting out of the house, i figured out where the good cemetery is, people are buying me food & talking me through all of this & rubbing the shaved part of my head & i’m happy

kara’s got a dr’s appt tmrw AM & the dude is apparently our designated Responsible Adult With Car so he’s picking her up from that & will be in my house once again tmrw morning & i fully plan on hiding in my room and pretending to be asleep cuz fuck that lmao don’t make me socialize i was not emotionally prepared for that

hayden sent me a 1995 Marilyn Manson gig poster and an enamel pin of a jackalope wearing a cone of shame & honestly??? i do not deserve him, talk about great friends

we need to get a frame for the poster but then me & kara are starting a MM wall in one of our living rooms & it’s gonna be great. the dude’s gonna come over with a drill & help me hang shelves in my room some time soon so i can finish getting unpacked cuz i’m just down to the boxes of art and getting all my shelf crap squared away & then i can finally finish Unpacking For Good

me & kara cried on the kitchen floor together last night from laughter bc i still have not learned my lesson in How Much Soup A Bowl Can Hold and my lizard brain was convinced if i got the beans under the liquid it would all fit, which, spoiler--it did not, and all my makeup ran off my face. it was that good. i love her so much

anyway thanks for listening check out the distro so i can buy groceries until my food stamp paperwork clears which will probably not be for almost another goddamn month i’m so pissed

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