#where did I go wrong?
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tiny ouyang zingchen is as much of a drama llama as his mom and auntie? He's going around looking for Justice and Causes? He's also as much of a romantic as his dad. It's kind of adorable.
Ouyang Zizhen, age 15: I just met the love of my life. Dad, is eighteen too soon to get married?
SLO: Y-yes?? At least wait until you're twenty-one????
*27 years later*
Ouyang Xingchen, age 18: Dad, I just got kicked out of school for breaking my vows...but I really love Zichen, so can't we just get married? I mean, I am of age. :>
OYZZ, a stressed (but proud) father:
#asks#ouyang xingchen#ouyang zizhen#oyzz is proud of his romantic boy but mom a-qing is furious#a-qing be like: you couldn't WAIT until you were done studying??#you had to be EXPELLED from the temple with your bf at 18 years old???#where did I go wrong?#meanwhile zizhen: my love it is my fault u_u#your husband is so smitten with you that it runs in the blood...forgive me...
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half the of the time I'm just a silly little guy and the other half I'm confused why everyone thinks I have autism
#i try so hard to be idk mature?#normal?#and on one hand i know theyre probably right and that fine#but on the other hand#where did i go wrong?#is everyone secretly mocking me behind my back???#am i actiting too childish?#do i need to stop being comfortable and put the walls back up?#aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa#i know its probably fine but this is also bringing back alot of trauma/bad memories#mine#the possum speaks#autism
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I have an announcement and I’m really mad about it. I’ve been screaming, crying and throwing up for 48 hours now.
Um I accidentally became a Tom stan because I fell in love with the way I wrote him.
And I absolutely refuse to say it louder than that.
I get to keep my Youcef stan card though, right?
#litg#no but—#I’m literally so upset#what happened#where did I go wrong?#litg youcef and Tom?#nooooo
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Source
“Where Did I Go Wrong?” by AKNeutron (1999)
Published by: AKWare
[WDIGW.ZZT] - “sddljmf”
Play This World Online
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Convos with my dog
Me: you want .... to go outside?
dog: *mild interest*
Me: do yooouuu .... want an octopus?
dog: *confused, but excited face*
Me: Do yoooouuuuuu want .... to commit a felony?
Dog: *Wild excited barking*
Me: >.>
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How to Save a Life, Part II: Where Did I Go Wrong? –@ [Mad Dog Skullcap]
In which Isabela's article comes out and Copper isn't too pleased…[takes place: April 05, 2024]
@copper-russell
[cw – medical stuff (minor, no real mentions), car accident (minor, mentioned but no details.)]
–@ –@ –@
Part One: Step One, You Say We Need to Talk
–@ –@ –@
[link here]
–@ –@ –@
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I don’t know what happened to my goals today but I accomplished something, I initially planned to at least talk to a therapist office about what insurance and counseling they had or needed but after a couple of voicemails I made a hair appointment instead. I did something today at least
#i don’t know how this happened#where did I go wrong?#eh I accomplished a task a least#maybe I’ll feel less sad with a haircut#i got to budget for a haircut now#how did this happen#I do want a haircut now#feeling lest bad about it#a haircut is a good change of pace#I can even dye my hair#LETS GO#it won’t be till after Christmas#darn it#just got to wait
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Yummers
this is my secondary blog, and I wanted to make it my primary but I can't. So, my primary is the one I used to use to just look at stuff and dawg what did I do to trigger this 💀💀
Fuck off Bridget I bet you're a loser >:(
#Ew#how did this happen#where did I go wrong?#What did I do to deserve this?#Please end the suffering that is my life.#Bawllz
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so one of the things that's so horrifying about birth control is that you have to, like, navigate this incredibly personal choice about your body and yet also face the epitome of misogyny. like, someone in the comments will say it wasn't that bad for me, and you'll be utterly silenced. like, everyone treats birth control like something that's super dirty. like, you have no fucking information or control over this thing because certain powerful people find it icky.
first it was the oral contraceptives. you went on those young, mostly for reasons unrelated to birth control - even your dermatologist suggested them to control your acne. the list of side effects was longer than your arm, and you just stared at it, horrified.
it made you so mentally ill, but you just heard that this was adulthood. that, yes, there are of course side effects, what did you expect. one day you looked up yasmin makes me depressed because surely this was far too intense, and you discovered that over 12,000 lawsuits had been successfully filed against the brand. it remains commonly prescribed on the open market. you switched brands a few times before oral contraceptives stopped being in any way effective. your doctor just, like, shrugged and said you could try a different brand again.
and the thing is that you're a feminist. you know from your own experience that birth control can be lifesaving, and that even when used for birth control - it is necessary healthcare. you have seen it save so many people from such bad situations, yourself included. it is critical that any person has access to birth control, and you would never suggest that we just get rid of all of it.
you were a little skeeved out by the implant (heard too many bad stories about it) and figured - okay, iud. it was some of the worst pain you've ever fucking experienced, and you did it with a small number of tylenol in your system (3), like you were getting your bikini line waxed instead of something practically sewn into your body.
and what's wild is that because sometimes it isn't a painful insertion process, it is vanishingly rare to find a doctor that will actually numb the area. while your doctor was talking to you about which brand to choose, you were thinking about the other ways you've been injured in your life. you thought about how you had a suspicious mole frozen off - something so small and easy - and how they'd numbed a huge area. you thought about when you broke your wrist and didn't actually notice, because you'd thought it was a sprain.
your understanding of pain is that how the human body responds to injury doesn't always relate to the actual pain tolerance of the person - it's more about how lucky that person is physically. maybe they broke it in a perfect way. maybe they happened to get hurt in a place without a lot of nerve endings. some people can handle a broken femur but crumble under a sore tooth. there's no true way to predict how "much" something actually hurts.
in no other situation would it be appropriate for doctors to ignore pain. just because someone can break their wrist and not feel it doesn't mean no one should receive pain meds for a broken wrist. it just means that particular person was lucky about it. it should not define treatment.
in the comments of videos about IUDs, literally thousands of people report agony. blinding, nauseating, soul-crushing agony. they say things like i had 2 kids and this was the worst thing i ever experienced or i literally have a tattoo on my ribs and it felt like a tickle. this thing almost killed me or would rather run into traffic than ever feel that again.
so it's either true that every single person who reports severe pain is exaggerating. or it's true that it's far more likely you will experience pain, rather than "just a pinch." and yet - there's nothing fucking been done about it. it kind of feels like a shrug is layered on top of everything - since technically it's elective, isn't it kind of your fault for agreeing to select it? stop being fearmongering. stop being defensive.
you fucking needed yours. you are almost weirdly protective of it. yours was so important for your physical and mental health. it helped you off hormonal birth control and even started helping some of your symptoms. it still fucking hurt for no fucking reason.
once while recovering from surgery, they offered you like 15 days of vicodin. you only took 2 of them. you've been offered oxy for tonsillitis. you turned down opioids while recovering from your wisdom tooth extraction. everything else has the option. you fucking drove yourself home after it, shocked and quietly weeping, feeling like something very bad had just happened. the nurse that held your hand during the experience looked down at you, tears in her eyes, and said - i know. this is cruelty in action.
and it's fucked up because the conversation is never just "hey, so the way we are doing this is fucking barbaric and doctors should be required to offer serious pain meds" - it's usually something around the lines of "well, it didn't kill you, did it?"
you just found out that removing that little bitch will hurt just as bad. a little pinch like how oral contraceptives have "some" serious symptoms. like your life and pain are expendable or not really important. like maybe we are all hysterical about it?
hysteria comes from the latin word for uterus, which is great!
you stand here at a crossroads. like - this thing is so important. did they really have to make it so fucking dangerous. and why is it that if you make a complaint, you're told - i didn't even want you to have this in the first place. we're told be careful what you wish for. we're told that it's our fault for wanting something so illict; we could simply choose not to need medication. that maybe if we don't like the scraps, we should get ready to starve.
we have been saying for so long - "i'm not asking you to remove the option, i'm asking you to reconsider the risk." this entire time we hear: well, this is what you wanted, isn't it?
#where's the word woman in this u might wonder if u suck#good news i am nonbinary and have a uterus so that is something that can happen#im also gender fluid tho which means im immune to certain psychic damage bc if u call me a woman i'll be like <3 okay <3#writeblr#the tightrope of ''ppl need access to this''#and like also#''what the fuck is going on over there'' is like. so difficult as an activist#i was <3 punctured <3 during mine#and almost bled out on the table :) they didn't have anyone standing by bc it's ''just a little insertion''#so i started crashing and i vaguely remember apologizing for the fuss as i heard my heart rate monitor start going <3 tachycardic <3#she wasn't even a bad doctor tbh#ps btw the reason i even HAD a heart monitor is that i have a genuine heart condition and they knew GOING IN that there was a chance#i'd crash on the table#like my heart just likes to do fun little tricks and <3 stop working <3 (i do not want to discuss the specifics ty i am okay im ontop of it#and they were like 'oh u will be fine' and then she did do a puncture thru my uterus . pop!#and im sitting there dizzy and feeling my heartrate start to drop bc it feels almost. beautiful. like. the whole ground just#woosh! out from under you. and shit is like grey's anatomy. i'm looking up at her grey eyes#she's old she wears this nice shawl she's like got Cool Lesbian vibes and people are sprinting into the room#from other parts of the clinic unrelated to me. while the monitor is like a little aria singing#and shes like hey youre okay stay awake stay with me something went wrong we have to keep trying#and i remember thinking - i was trying to think of nice things. i have so many beautiful places that now overlap#with this terrible memory#i became dimly aware that there was too much on her wrists and hands. like#that was too many liters#and then when they had finished all this. i packed up and drove myself home#i have had (bad thing) happen to me. and the same feeling happened after#that numb almost lamblike bleating. you cry without noise. like. ur body is so shocked and ur mind so empty#you just stare at the road and everything everything is happening behind glass and static and you are standing so far away from it#while you hold ur hands at 10 and 2. and something in ur brain is SCREAMING at you - IT WAS BAD AND IT SHOULDNT HAVE HAPPENED#and ur just watching the alarms in your body going off and youre thinking. a little pinch! ha. i think i just lost something important.
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another one that I'm not super happy with, but continuing to mess with it isn't going to help! so here he is! 🦇 there was a lot I was trying to get across in this one, so uhhhhh hopefully it reads.
we're almost out of unique magics now...just Ace (and maybe Grim?) left!
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#unique magic posters#drawing lilia slightly more on-model than i usually do feels so wrong#i just want to draw the tallest spikes#lilia: (writing down his height) 5'6“...5'2” in a hat#(actually i'm pretty sure he would just write 'fun-size' but i digress)#anyway lilia. hey lilia. your magic is not cradle-specific so WHY is it called that#did it come in like 'so in like 500-ish years we're going to have a significant moment with a cradle. just trust me bro.'#'in the meantime enjoy having the weirdest magic name ever'#probably came in useful for raising kids though#don't put that in your mouth don't you know where it's BEEN#because i do#(long stare off into middle distance) i know where it's been
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I need codependent Danny/Jason as a little treat (for me) and I love the idea of them having some sort of instant connection the moment they meet (bc ghost stuff idk)
Danny who's been dropped in Gotham with no way home (alt universe??) and he's been here for 36 hours and having a Very bad time senses a liminal being and immediately latches onto them heedless of the fact that his new best friend is shooting at some seedy guys in an alley and goes off about how stressed he is and how he can't make it back to the ghost zone and what a bad day he's been having (and it's important to note Danny is a littol ghost boy literally hanging off of Jason's neck as he floats aimlessly) and Jason is like "who are you??" And Danny is like "oh sorry I'm Danny lol" and then just continues lamenting his woes
And honestly ? This might as well happen. Nothing about this Danny guy(is he human?) gives Jason a bad vibe and tbh he's never felt more calm and level headed before so he just keeps up his usual Red Hood patrol and doesn't even think about it when he heads back to a safehouse and feeds Danny dinner (breakfast) before crashing for half the day
The only thing I actually need is Jason meeting up with the bats for some sort of Intel meeting and they're like "uhhh who's that" and Jason is like "that's Danny." And does not elaborate (very ".... What do you have there?" "A smoothie" vibes)
And it takes them a while to realize that these two have known each other for less than 12 hours and are literally attached at the hip
#very remora fish with a shark#jason todd#danny fenton#danny phantom#dpxdc#dp x dc#this isnt super important but i imagine Danny's ghost form as young and unaged from his death so jason is used to this small whispy kid#who just hangs off him and talks literally all the time#so when something comes up and someone is like 'idk if we can bring danny looking like... that' (glowing and a literal ghost)#danny is like 'oh ok u need a human? ok :)' and transforms#its been WEEKS#jason didn't know he could do that#nobody did#and now theres this 20ish dude standing there#human form danny doesn't talk a lot (anxiety) ghost form danny can't stop talking (anxiety)#could be a ship fic and at this point jason goes from 'where is my little buddy :(' to 👀😳#i imagine theres a sort of feedback loop with them both feeding off of each other's ecto energies and vibes idk#so when danny is human its not as strong#batman is convince this strange entity is like hypnoyizing his son and like hes not WRONG#but it goes both ways#idk#i just need more codependency fics :(#i should go on a bender#ignore my 500 open tabs and go to town
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I really hate when certain events trigger memories of dreams I've had that show things that happened and they feel like they were supposed to happen but things never went as those dreams went. It makes me feel like I'm not on the intended path I was supposed to be on to make those a reality.
It makes me feel like I messed up somewhere along the way and I want to fix it so badly. But nothing I do makes it eight again. And I just keep getting glimpses of dreams I've had that they aren't coming true anymore.
Was it all meant to be a tease to me? Did I slip into an alternate universe and saw these events just to make myself hopeful for the future? Seems a little fucked up if you ask me.
#personal#dreams#deja vu#i hate this feeling i have#am i doing things right anymore#where did i go wrong?
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i've taken to drawing AW2 culinary crimes whilst i am beaten unconscious by art block. bon appetit
#alan wake#alan wake 2#aw2 spoilers#tim breaker#remedy games#shitpost#my art#fanart#alan wake fanart#due credit to the sicko on reddit that actually did the 3rd picture#i also realise now nobody outside of the uk eats pickled mussels lol#i see all these recipes with spices n shit WRONG 2 ingredients mussels + malt vinegar#drink the vinegar#contemplate where you went wrong in your life#where was i going with this
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“Where Did I Go Wrong?” by AKNeutron (1999)
Published by: AKWare
[WDIGW.ZZT] - “sddljmf”
Play This World Online
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I saw your amazing Merrin redesign and this popped into my head:
If you could redesign Ahsoka's TL4J outfit, what would it look like?
aw thank you so much!! and ooo good question!! obviously I love Ahsoka's canon show/tl4j-era design and don't think I could match it, but here're some quick ideas! i'd definitely lean into the Daughter + Rebels finale + that one tcw vision for some inspo
(donation doodles! // tip jar)
#'the way to a womans heart is [??]' wrong its potatoes and asking her design questions#also i love the little sweater thing u can see beneath ahsoka's cloak in the rebels finale. where did that go#ahsoka tano#outfit design#my doods#thanks for the ask!
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