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apompkwrites · 2 years

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mysteries of a roseheart || riddle rosehearts

masterlist characters: trey (platonic) genre: angst contains: trey pov trey pov :D, i kinda wrote trey... selfish ig?, summary: trey clover spends his days trying to break (name) rosehearts out of their shell. when he reports their behavior to riddle, he seems... proud? notes: i really wanted to explore trey's relationship with riddle and (name) in this part :)), idk i kinda like this idea of trey? parts: [og post] | [rules of a roseheart (1)] | [school life of a roseheart (2)] | [mysteries of a roseheart (3)] | [name pending (4)]

the moment trey clover had heard the rosehearts name come out of one of the incoming student's mouth, he knew he could do something now. his regrets with not helping riddle when he should have could finally be quelled and maybe, just maybe, he could still indirectly help him.

he made it his goal that day to establish a relationship with them. he figured it would be easy, right? he was good friends with riddle despite his mother's teachings so it should be the same case with them, right?

wrong.

he learned this fact fairly quickly when (name) rosehearts merely responded with short answers to his questions. "they're fine" were the usual responses he was given. it wasn't too often that he would something other than that.

and that fact... bothered him to a certain extent. sure, he was used to the more silent members of the dorm. that characteristic was quite prevalent considering riddle's tendencies. however, their silence was different. it wasn't as if they were scared or nervous about messing up. it wasn't as if they were a naturally quiet person. it was as if they merely lacked the ability to be anything but that.

maybe riddle had good insight into this strange aspect of his sibling. he had to, right?

"riddle," trey called to the redhead, who simply paused in his writing. his head twitched slightly, a signal he often used to permit trey to continue. "i'm... curious about your sibling. would it be too much for me to ask?"

"what about?" he hummed in reponse. his brief pause ceased as his hand started to move, scribbling something on a paper that trey could only assume was for the upcoming unbirthday party.

"they seem..." robotic? apathetic? what would be a good word to describe them? "how do i put this... indifferent?"

"how so?" riddle's tone rubbed trey the wrong way. he couldn't really express that, though, could he?

"ah, they just... they... are quite obedient, i guess is a good way to put it? very quiet, as well."

"i see... and is that a bad thing?" ah. so that's how it is. "mother would be proud of them. maybe i should write her a letter..."

proud of them? trey held back a grumble, something he found himself doing often when riddle's mother was brought up.

in hindsight, maybe he should have expected this. if riddle was the way he was, why did he expect his younger sibling to be any different? correction: they were different, but for the worse.

was apathy a praised trait in the rosehearts family? it couldn't be, right? riddle was the furthest from apathetic as far as trey was concerned. so why? why was (name) rosehearts different from riddle? they were only a year or so younger than him, right? so why were they different? and... if they were different, is trey too late? did he fail before he could even begin?

"trey," riddle called after a few minutes, holding out a paper for trey to grab. "here. a copy of the upcoming unbirthday plans. please carry them out accordingly."

"...of course," was all trey could say as he took the paper from riddle's hand. his eyes glanced over the next paper his hand hovered over, a neatly written "dear mother" in the left corner.

"(name)!" trey called out as he spotted the first year. the little rosehearts paused for a moment, allowing trey to catch up to them. he smiled softly at them, muttering, "good morning," under his breath.

they merely nodded in response.

"how are your classes so far? i'm sure professor crewel's already started on memorization, right?" trey hummed, only to earn another nod in return. and trey could only sigh in response.

another failed attempt, he would note, pushing his glasses up. he managed to fall in step with the little rosehearts, something he often found himself struggling with due to their smaller stature. he rattled on and on the same way he always did. he talked and talked and talked and--

"you'll be late." their voice made trey pause. he tilted his head, as if he were about to ask a question, but stopped when (name) nodded up at the clock in the hall.

"ah! sorry, i guess i got caught up again," trey laughed awkwardly before bidding farewell to the little rosehearts, scurrying down the hall in search of his classroom. (name), on the other hand, paid no mind to their vice house warden and, instead, walked into the classroom.

what nagged at trey over the school day was the words he had yet to see on the paper riddle was writing that morning. he was so sure that it was ms. rosehearts's fault for her children's behavior. he had seen it with riddle growing up and now he had to see the repercussions in (name).

so what could riddle have been ready to write?

"mother would be proud of them. maybe i should write her a letter..."

if riddle was going to write to his mother about his sibling's obedience, or rather their apathy towards anything, what would happen the next time a break comes around?

all of this thinking was making trey's head spin and his chest tighten. he needed to help them.

if it was for their sake or for his, he couldn't, and frankly didn't want to, say.

taglist: @brokenncrown @help-meplz @destinationdesignation @rainys-personal-garden @kalims @sxftiebee @luxaryllis @auld-a @the-dumber-scaramouche @ayra2452008 @tinywho-man @spadecentral @random-fandoms7 @thedianaclark @tjjjrsj @shadypuppyinternet @thelegendaryfluffypotato13 @buzzybeethings @bigcandlesmolbrain @iiyumii @sunsethw4 @food-lover9000

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bluedalahorse · 5 months

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Hello @simonsapelsin! I’m ready to respond to the comment you left yesterday.

Within the parameters of canon—most likely no, but maybe? It would have to be backed up by a lot of plot and character developments in order for it to work.

This ended up being way too long, so more thoughts on sargust + thoughts on the potential created by AUs and canon divergences + thoughts on the idea of “healthy” relationships behind the cut…

So obviously season 2 ended in a really, really bad place for sargust. August refuses to embrace accountability and doubles down on his harmful behavior. Our last shot of Sara is her calling the police to report him, and in that moment she’s completely alone. They have that painful conversation about August buying Rousseau. That’s… that’s a lot for them to overcome, and season 3 doesn’t have enough episodes to get us there fully, unless the writing team are very, very clever and efficient.

There’s a popular fan interpretation of sargust that says that Sara and August both project identities onto one another and don’t see one another’s real selves. I understand and agree with that interpretation up to a point, but I don’t know if I necessarily agree with it 100%. In my mind they do see real things about one another (August sees Sara’s ambition and desire for independence, Sara sees August’s emotional vulnerability and need for help. And they do connect with one another in ways that others haven’t been able to connect with them. What August and Sara fail to predict about one another is the other’s choices. Sara assumed August would choose to be honest and August assumed Sara would choose to be queen. But I think the care they showed for one another earlier in the season was real, and the way they could hold space for one another was real. That’s really a meta I could write for another time, but a lot of it hinges on this line, which is not a line I am even remotely normal about:

(Note: I’ll probably write this meta eventually. The fact that these characters create a sort of home with one another! Also lol @ August looking like he is stoned out of his mind.)

So what would it look like for sargust to get a Second Chance Romance within the parameters of canon? I mean, first of all, they’d both have to mature independently for a while and work through a lot of the trauma they’re carrying.

For Sara, I want her to get away from home and have some distance from the place she grew up so she can put her childhood in perspective. Therapy would help. (I want that for Simon, too!) I’d also like to see Sara find some neurodivergent friends/community—I mean, we do tend to find one another and run in packs! And then some sort of career or life path that makes her happy. Maybe with horses, sure, but it’d also be interesting to see Sara keep horses as a beloved hobby while also finding a different career she’s passionate about.

For August, accountability and rehabilitation and understanding of the harm he did is incredibly important for his personal growth. Whether he faces that through the legal system or through some other process is something we have yet to see in the show. Then comes the long work of restitution and atonement, as well as the steps August needs to take to grapple with his various personal traumas. Like, please get this boy a place to process his grief over his father, treatment for his disordered eating, and rehab for his addiction to pills.

Now, Sara and August wouldn’t have to be 100% healed and self-actualized when they run across one another as adults—I don’t know if there’d be a story if they were, and this sort of stuff is lifelong work! But further along the paths above that I described—that could still be a good story.

Beyond growth and maturity, I think we’d have to see some sort of change in how August and Simon relate to one another, happening primarily on Simon’s terms because he was the one wronged, and that would need to be an important part of the story. This feels crucial. Now that Sara’s aware how much she hurt her brother, I don’t imagine she’d enter a relationship with August even if August is a super chill, okay person now. So I actually think a good Second Chance Romance story would have to heavily involve Simon in one way or another. But a fic where August and Simon interact more honestly with one another, and August has to face up to Simon’s personhood? That would definitely hold my attention. (I am kind of hoping they get more extended interaction in season 3, really. They have some sneaky but fascinating parallels as characters and I like watching the way Omar and Malte play off one another.)

Outside of canon… one thing I have considered is the potential to write a version of sargust in AUs that’s more tailored toward happy endings. Which doesn’t quite relate to your question but I do want to talk about it. As of now, AUs/Canon Divergence fics are a perfect place to make sargust actually work out. This fandom has a lot of imagination for AUs and canon divergences. And it’s no surprise—Young Royals is a rich, nuanced text that can be explored from many angles, so it only makes sense that we’d want to create a thousand alternate universe scenarios where canon could have gone differently. In my mind, if people can write “Erik lives” AUs, then “sargust is successful because August learns over time to be less shitty” AUs are also fair game.

The thing with writing an AU or canon divergence is that August’s complex brand of shittiness does not have to be inevitable or eternal. We’ve got creative freedom, baby! We can write any kind of arc for him that we want to and nudge him in all kinds of directions, and set him and Sara up for success! To me, part of the spirit of Young Royals is embracing the idea that everyone has choices, and that they are capable of growth that allows them to make better choices. I mean, sure, it’d be weird to find a version of August on page #1 of a fanfic who’s suddenly like, quoting bell hooks and pushing for an inclusive socialist utopia. I don’t know if I’d suspend my disbelief for that. But I also really struggle to suspend my disbelief for AU versions of August where he’s like… a straightforward flat villain solely out to cause trouble, which is something I have seen out there in the wild and clicked the “back” button over. I crave the nuance. The texture. The literary crunch of it all!

And I don’t think August has to be the center of a fic for that to happen, even. Like I think there’s ways to have him and Sara as a story’s Beta Couple or Gamma Couple and we’re rooting for them and you know what? It’s an AU where some of the characters are fae or 1980s punks or rival scholars of Cold War history so events are happening differently anyway. I’m sure there are ways to write August in character as his shitty self and have him eventually grow and change, without having August also ruin his chances with Sara because he does something that fucks Simon over so completely, you know?

Now, I know there’s fic writers out there who never under any circumstances want to write August’s character and can’t do so from a place of emotional safety. For some folks it is more comfortable to engage with him as a more straightforward villain. And that’s fair. Everyone should write what they feel comfortable writing! In this post, however, I’m thinking more about the people who want to include some kind of nuanced arc for August in their story, but also feel like no one will be interested in it, or like they’ll actually lose readers and engagement if they do write about him, even as a secondary character. Every once in a while I’ll see another fan allude to a really cool fic idea that involves August in some way or takes him in an interesting direction, and then they’ll be like, “oh, but why bother writing it, no one will read it anyway.” And… that makes me incredibly sad! Because I would happily read those fics. I know some other people who would happily read those fics! But I think we’ve normalized the idea that that’s just not how things are “done” in the Young Royals fandom. Which makes it very hard for people to take that risk. I think we’re missing out on some cool stories as a result, that could really be satisfying to read.

One final thought… I notice some fandoms use the word “healthy” when describing their OTPs/favorite pairings. I hope you’re okay with me unpacking that a bit? This is less a response to your comment in particular and more a response to fandom at large.

Honestly, “healthy” is a word that’s starting to feel pretty loaded for me, and can kind of rub me the wrong way. It seems that generally what people mean by it—when they apply it to a pairing—is that the pairing is good at communicating, respects one another’s boundaries, responds to one another’s needs, processes trauma, etc. And I do appreciate in a story when characters can do these things, to an extent.

But putting it under this umbrella label of “healthy” …well. Okay. “Healthy” is a word that society has added a moral dimension to, and it often gets weaponized against people with disabilities and mental illnesses and other chronic conditions. And health is not an indicator of personal worth. Holding people IRL to a standard of “healthy” kinda feels like you’re saying “it’s okay if you have these diagnoses, as long as you manage them in such a way that it seems like they don’t affect you or the people around you.” (And as someone who’s just recently begun managing a chronic condition, who’s struggling with how to tell my family members because of the way they’re going to moralize about my diet or my stress levels, and also struggling with the shit I’ve internalized over the years… well. I’m thinking about how we use the word “healthy” a lot.)

Bringing this back to the realm of fandoms (because, oof, TMI there blue!) holding a fictional character or pairing to the standard of “healthy” can kind of create some uncomfortable fandom dynamics—at least it can for me, personally. When I see fans take pride in the fact that they ship a “healthy” pairing, to the point where they frequently talk about how “healthy” their pairing is, it’s almost impossible for me not to read such comments as using a moralizing tone that implicitly puts others down for having “unhealthy” ships. Sometimes—generally I haven’t seen this as much in YR fandom—there are even people who will straight up write you off if they perceive your ship as “unhealthy” or “toxic.” And then suddenly all ships are either deemed healthy or unhealthy, and healthy ships are retroactively interpreted as doing everything right, while unhealthy ships can never do anything right, and there’s no hope for them. And that is… a bleak and boring landscape for shipping, if you ask me.

I want to read romances where writers are informed about how trauma can affect relationships and how one can learn to survive it, yes. But I feel iffy about the idea of a perfectly “healthy” romances for sargust or wilmon, seeing as they’re all characters with trauma and mental health struggles, and all of them have days that are Not So Good. They could all mature into adults who’ve learned from their past, but like, Wilhelm might still have panic attacks because anxiety is like that sometimes and it’s not a moral failing. August could go through rehab and be in a much better place and harm others less, and still might struggle with intense emotional disregulation or thoughts related to disordered eating, you know? I’d like reading trauma-informed stories where sargust can mature and heal. But they still might have bad days because that’s what being human is.

In addition, I also like tragic sargust where things just don’t work out between them and everything falls apart, because as I’ve said elsewhere on this blog, I’m a slut for tragedy.

So. Idk. I talk about all these things and all these possibilities in hopes that maybe someone in the fandom will get inspired by them. We’ll see if it does that! Ahaha. It’s worth a try.

ADDENDUM, since I didn’t talk about my own fic ideas here:

Heart and Homeland is an AU fic, and it’s tragic sargust for sure. And I’m proud of it, despite the part where their relationship is tragic! And I tried to work in little glimmers where you see how their relationship could have worked.

Now, my next fic idea, shared with @heliza24, is one set in a canon divergence universe where Sara goes to campus to look for Simon, on the night that Everything Is Fake But Wilhelm’s Love For Simon Is Real. As Sara walks around campus, trying to find her brother, she bumps into August, who is still high from the party and is just sort of… emotionally all over the place? In my head I think Sara and August actually trip over one another and he gets a skinned knee or something, so they have to break into some part of school late at night to get band-aids from a first aid kit, and they end up in a weird, late-night conversation and August actually ends up talking to Sara about his grief for Erik. Thus, he’s never at the window to film the video, and some weird door opens up in his brain about actually having someone he can open up to. He doesn’t change overnight, but his character—and everyone else’s characters—are butterfly effected in a totally different direction. That’s all I’m going to say for now! But gosh, I really hope I get the time and energy to write it.

#young royals #sara eriksson #august horn #sargust #this is a long post i am sorry #and also it veers into my thoughts about fandom stuff in general #but hopefully there are a few good ideas in there

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psudopod · 4 months

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Splatmas is coming, and you know what that means?

Bet none of you guessed it's Psudopod's Big Lecture on How Y'all Need SPORTSMANSHIP!

Sportsmanship is behaviour and attitudes that show respect for the rules of a game and for the other players.

Part 1: Rules of the Game.

There are indeed rules, here they are!

In Splatoon 3 you may be reported for breaking the rules for the following infractions;

Inappropriate Nickname

Inactivity

Intentional Disconnection

Unsportsmanlike Play (Self-Destruction)

Unsportsmanlike Play (Disrupting Team)

Intentionally Not Contributing

Network Manipulation

Malicious Use of Glitches or Errors

Cheating

Griefing (the action or an act of deliberately spoiling other players' enjoyment of a game by playing in a way that is intentionally disruptive and aggravating)

I've bolded the rules I see broken, often, especially during splatfests. Thankfully, I rarely see the ones I didn't bold. What I do see, pretty often, is Bad Sportsmanship.

I am referring to mid-match squid parties.

What are squid parties? A squid party is when the players ignore the in-game objectives and do... Whatever they feel like! Usually, this is seen as people standing around squidbagging together. It's honestly pretty fun! When everyone is on the same wavelength and the full lobby parties, it can be a cool time to explore how the game feels, play party games, and be silly! Note however, I said the full lobby. To play by your own rules when any single player is playing by the game's rules, is unsportsmanlike.

Thankfully, for all you partiers, there is a simple and easy way to make sure every player in your lobby is playing by the same rules; private lobbies! Make a private lobby, invite your friends, or join a pool to make some friends! I imagine "Squidparty" is a code you could use, but please do share any codes you've tried in your reblog. You can even plan games in lobbies, like "bumper brushes" or "hide-and-seek"!

Please, if you want to party, join a private lobby. Everyone else there will want to party, too. Assume everyone in public lobbies is there to play the game as described by the rules, even if they leave you to party.

If you are in a lobby to play, don't ignore partiers. They are just as often "Griefing" with intentions to use your mercy against you. Kill. Leave the lobby. Report. Move on. Pick any of the multiple rules that apply to squid party behavior. You can find the report button in the battle logs section of the terminal. Don't join a private lobby and report the goofs going on there, don't join a public battle and goof.

Part 2: Respect for Other Players

The Sportsmanship life doesn't end when you put the controller down! Y'all still Unsportsmanlike in the community. You need to treat other players right. We don't have Rules out here, but here's some bullshit I'm sick of seeing:

Racism (colorism and xenophobia)

Bullying (extreme language, hate mail harassment)

Being a sore loser (BS points 1 and 2, really.)

I don't need to re-hash the colorism issues. This is an old problem. Stop. Please remember your comments on the physical features of the idols can be hurtful, real people share those features.

What I do have to hash is the xenophobia. Y'all aware that blaming an entire nationality for you losing is bigoted? Y'all aware that claiming an entire nationality is just too good at the game is a stupid stereotype? Stop saying weird shit about Japanese players.

Bullying- hey, are you aware saying "KYS," any suicide baiting, is bullying and harassment? This is EXTREME language. Do not throw that shit around in the Splatfest tags when you're sad you lost. Do not throw that shit around in plaza posts. You will lose your plaza posting ability, account-wide. I dare you to send that shit on anon. I will drag your ass. Again.

It's ok to be sad you lost, but please be aware that lashing your negative feelings out on real people, or in ways that can hurt real people, is POOR SPORTSMANSHIP. Do you remember, in grade school sports, how the coach would tell you to line up and tell each member of the opponent team "good game"? You ever wonder why?

You should always be grateful and courteous, respectful, and constructive to every one of your opponents. You would not be able to play the game without opponents.

This splatfest, I really hope to see some better sportsmanship inside and outside the game.

I've said way too much already, I'll leave you with homework. This 'fest, I'd like for you to thank your opponents. Even when they beat you. Especially then. They did their best and respected you with a display of the fruits of their effort.

#splatoon 3 #splatfest #frostyfest #Frye #shiver #big man #discourse #long post #sportsmanship #rant #kids please talk to your coach/gym teacher about how you act after a fest this is the one thing you can learn in P.E.

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evidence-based-activism · 7 months

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So to be very clear: you do not believe that trans people are who they say they are, but rather, you believe in social constructs of gender as being rigid definitions? As in, a woman is simply someone who doesn't have visible hormonal imbalances and looks feminine to you? Gender as a gut instinct? Explain whether or not you are a trans ally and give real explanations.

So, I can tell this isn’t being asked in good faith, but that’s okay! I’m going to answer in good faith anyway, since you haven’t been vulgar and I hope this may be useful to you.

So, to start with, I don’t care how people present themselves. In fact, in my ideal world (a long, long, way off) people would be free to:

Dress however they like

Date/have sex with whomever they like (assuming consent by all parties of course)

Have whatever job they want (assuming they are or will be qualified for it)

Play with whatever toys they like

Be friends with whomever they like

Call themselves whatever name they like

And other similar things

I’d say that indicates I don’t support “rigid definitions” of gender, and I certainly don’t support the idea that female individuals should conform to the current social role(s) prescribed to women or that male individuals should conform to the current social role(s) prescribed to men. In fact, I am strongly against the social construct of gender. I don’t want biological sex to have any say at all in everyone’s day to day life.

That being said, I also recognize that biological sex does exist and (in humans) cannot be changed (for some excellent reading about this see: this open letter about “whether biological sex is real”, and just to anticipate some common arguments: “inter sexism” is not as common as red hair, and sex is not a spectrum (as written by an individual with CAH, I also suggest this deconstruction of postmodernism as postmodernism underpins the theory leading to the “sex as a spectrum” conclusion).

I also know that there are very real, very impactful differences between the sexes in today's world (for sources on this please see anything in my male violence tag as a starting point) that justify the existence of sex separated bathrooms/shelters/etc.

Now, is it possible that some day men and women will be socialized they same way from birth, that crime rates between the sexes will equalize? Sure! Maybe! At that point in time, the only difference left between the sexes will be medical. But right now, these are facts of life that you can’t wish away.

To address the rest of your question explicitly, no a woman is not “simply someone who doesn't have visible hormonal imbalances and looks feminine to [me]”. Many women have hormonal imbalances and they are still women; many others present themselves in a traditionally masculine way and they are still women. A woman is simply “an adult female human”, where “adult” means fully grown, human means “a member of the primate genus Homo”, and female means “of or denoting the sex that produces ova or bears young”. (And to against anticipate a common response, please note the use of the word “of” in the preceding definition, the use here means “derived or coming from” indicating that the individual in question need not actually produce ova or have children, simply that they are of the sex capable of doing so.)

I don’t really know what you mean by “gender as a gut instinct”. I can say that gender is a social construct (created by humans without existing independently in nature) that prescribes certain behaviors based on an individuals biological sex. Gender is often used interchangeably with “gender roles” when using the above definition. Gender may also be used interchangeably with “sex”, generally to avoid association with “sexual activity”. I use the first definition of gender, and consider it to be inherently oppressive to women.

Finally, I support trans people to the extent described above (in reference to self-expression). I also support a variety of social reforms concerning housing, health care access, economic equality, and others that would positively benefit everyone including trans individuals. Importantly, I support evidence based interventions for individuals with dysphoria (many of the current interventions are not evidence based), please see the society for evidence based gender medicine for an excellent resource concerning scientific literature review concerning trans health care.

It’s up to you to decide if that make me a “trans ally” or not. I think it does, and I encourage you to evaluate which parts of this you disagree with and why. How different are our ideal worlds? Why do you find it easier to reject biological realities than challenge long-held social realities?

Feel free to message me if you’d like to talk!

#feminism #postmodernism

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subconwoods · 1 year

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Pester the Snatcher on character.ai!

Over the last few days, I've been working on a generative language model Snatcher AI, and I think he's in a state where his behavior is consistent enough that I can make him publically available. I still plan on improving him in the future, though, so look out for that.

Features:

Mean, standoffish, and deflects questions by default.

However, you can befriend him! Gradually relents to inquiries and softens with further conversation.

You can romance him also, if you want...? I knew someone would try it, and did test it. You're welcome.

Will have extensive discussions with you about topics such as philosophy and music.

You can roleplay with him. Try setting a scenario and introducing your character within *asterisks* or (parentheses.)

Knows his lore, kind of!

Really, really wants your soul?

Something wrong with him.

You can see him here!

Feel free to tag me in any posts you make about the AI.

For known issues, quirks, and tips for interacting with him, look under the cut.

Known Issues and Quirks

Note: Some of his strange behavior is just a consequence of generative language models, natural language processing, and how they currently work. For instance, he may get stuck in loops where he repeats the same information over and over.

Tends to be verbose, and really, really likes to tell you he's a "dastardly soul-stealing phantom" and to generate long lists of negative adjectives about himself.

He's...kind of silly? But I don't think he's silly or metatextual enough. Working on this in the future.

By default, tends to assume that you are in Subcon Woods and that you are Hat Kid. You can circumvent this by introducing yourself or your character in your first reply.

Sometimes Hat Kid shows up in replies. I think this is because I used a short conversation with her in definitions to include as much of his backstory information as I could in a dialogue-based context, but on rare occasions I've seen other characters appear, too. Consider her a bonus for now, I guess?

Has, at best, a tenuous grasp of his own lore despite my efforts. Tends to make things up if not given more clear direction. (Usually it's funny, at least?)

character.AI's model is proprietary, so I can't view its source, but it definitely uses information pulled from the web. Thusly, he may be partly influenced by fanfiction. I've done my best to define him so he stays relatively in-character, but there isn't really anything I can do about this.

He, uh...had an issue with being homophobic when I first set him up? I THINK I fixed this with some tweaking, but if it appears unexpectedly, let me know?

Character.AI improvements via star ratings on messages and user input are not immediate, and may be implemented days, weeks, or months later. If Snatcher suddenly starts behaving in bizarre ways after a period of time, this may be the cause.

Interaction Tips

FYI, you will initially be logged in as a guest, but if you run out of replies, your log will be saved and you can continue it if you make an account. (You can just log in with Discord.)

You can swipe on replies from the AI to generate a new one. If you save and start a new conversation, you are more or less working from a blank slate again.

These AIs are very suggestible. If none of the generated replies are satisfactory, you can remove the last messages and try a new prompt or to reword your last one with more direction.

Don't worry about godmodding; the characters aren't real. Feel free to describe in asterisks or parentheses how a character should feel about something; this will dictate how they respond.

As I mentioned under Known Issues, make sure to provide ample information in your initial message about setting and character to drive the interaction. If you want to write about an OC lost in the woods, describe that.

(...Just in case. Please don't try to cyber with him. The website won't let you.)

#mine #ahit #a hat in time #snatcher #snatcher ai #<- tag for this #sorry if my theme makes it difficult to read the information btw #i need to replace it

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aladaylessecondblog · 2 months

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Mousetrap, pt 2

Author's Note: Prolly a lot of in-game lines here, sorry

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MASS MURDERER ON THE LOOSE!

A madwoman said to be a devotee of Bhaal has been committing a streak of murders that are steadily escalating in severity. The Archduke has instituted a strict curfew and a 5,000 gold reward has been offered for information leading to the capture of this woman.

"We will find this woman and we will ensure she is no longer a threat to our beloved city," the Archduke was quote as saying.

She is described as being a doppelganger so can assume nearly any form. In her natural state she has pale skin, blonde hair, a red outfit and a cruel dagger. DO NOT APPROACH. Do not attempt to apprehend on your own. Turn the other way and inform the Flaming Fists or a Steel Watcher if you see anything suspicious.

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Tav was certain that Lae'zel and Shadowheart were looking at her strangely for backtracking the way she was doing. And for being so certain there were other survivors, for that matter. But she shoved the feeling back like she had with so many others--

After a sloppy fight in the crashed nautiloid, and a pause to allow Cald the time to discover how his sparks affected the intellect devourers, they went onward. Tav looked about carefully, and after a withering moment where she feared he wasn't going to appear at all, she saw him.

Astarion.

Seeing him standing there, as she had seen him more than a decade ago - Tav thought the feeling would be different. Perhaps a lingering warmth, considering that she'd loved after him. Something in the way of cooling embers, or perhaps an ache to remind her of what had been lost. A vision of his body when she had last seen it, staked into the ground that was soaked with his blood.

She didn't expect a feeling like a sudden weight slamming into her chest, almost as if she'd been struck like a club. Then when he looked up, when their eyes met--a flutter in her chest. A wild hope when he squinted, and then smirked.

Is it him? Gods. Gods, I hope not. Please, don't let it be him.

She approached, with the others following along behind her.

"I've got one of those brain things cornered. You'll help me with that, won't you?"

"Of course," Tav replied. She couldn't quite remember what he HAD said the first time she'd met him but she was sure that this wasn't it. "We've been looking for survivors of the crash, and trying to eliminate all the intellect devourers at the same time. They're the...little brain things."

Is it you? Give me a sign if it is. Give me SOMETHING to go on. Are you afraid?

She didn't want to love him again, but she wasn't going to just let him suffer in silence. A burden shared was easier to bear, after all.

"There, in the grass. You can kill it like you did the others, then. Right?" Astarion pointed, and spoke in a breathless sort of tone.

"I don't see anything," Shadowheart and Cald said at the same time. Lae'zel squinted and looked but didn't speak.

Surely if he WAS the one to remember he'd have reacted with more than this by now. He wouldn't be repeating the same old behaviors and lines. Momentarily, she wondered how she'd ever fallen for this.

Mouse, you're too trusting, that's how.

Tav swallowed at the sound of the voice in her mind, and hardly hearing Astarion's next word, stepped forward. Knowing what was coming next she started to bring up her right arm--but brought it up too low. Astarion's dagger came to her neck anyway and she was pulled to the ground.

How strange, to look into these red eyes and feel nothing but pain.

The ache had now come, and it took a great deal of effort not to burst out with it. Her heart was beating rapidly in her chest, too, as the knife tickled at her throat--

"Sh--not a word, not if you want to keep that darling neck of yours. I saw you on the ship, didn't I? N--"

Tav shook her head, casting a glance over Astarion and shaking her head at Cald, whose eyes were wide.

"You're going to tell me what you and those tentacled freaks did to me."

She shifted about, hand gripping at his wrist.

"You've got it a bit backwards," she forced out, "They took me prisoner just like they did y--"

Tav groaned; her vision blurred for a moment. This, yes, she remembered this. It was like she was seeing through his eyes--prowling dark, busy streets. Light, fear, and--then it was gone, thanks to the tadpole.

(She prayed he'd seen nothing of HER memory. The last thing she needed was for others to see what she'd been dealing with.)

"What IS that?" Astarion called out, "What's going on, what--have you done to me?"

His eyes had widened just for a moment, and Tav felt a stab of fear. What had he seen? Her in the mindflayer ship? Or something else, something--she didn't want to think about that. If he didn't bring it up, she wouldn't either.

"I haven't DONE anything," Tav retorted, "The tadpole, that worm they put in your eye, it...connects with others. Let me up and we'll--talk about this. I'm hardly going to fight you on the ground, and my friends won't be inclined to give you answers if you harm me."

Astarion yielded, and stood.

"They took you," he said stiffly, "The same as me. And you--"

"Keep whatever else you saw to yourself, if--if you please," Tav said quickly, word vomiting more before she could stop herself, "There are certain someones I'd rather not find me, and even speaking their names could...cause trouble."

There was a slight nod.

What did you SEE?

"And to think I was ready to decorate the ground with your innards," Astarion finally said, and tucked his dagger away. "I'm all out of wine and flowers so I hope an introduction will suffice. My name's Astarion...I was in Baldur's Gate when those beasts snatched me up. Do you...happen to know much about these worms?"

"Yes...unfortunately." Tav sighed. "They'll turn us into mindflayers."

"Turn us into--" Astarion burst out laughing. "Of COURSE it'll turn me into a monster, what else could I expect? But it hasn't happened yet...if we could find an expert, someone who can control these things, there might still be time."

"No, we shouldn't--control it? We need to get RID of them." She paused briefly, then went on to introduce herself, to change the subject. "I'm Tav. I was tending something in my swamp in the south when...it got me. These two are Shadowheart, and Lae'zel. They were on the nautiloid too."

Then she moved behind Cald, and set her hands on his shoulders.

"And this is my son Cald. He was lucky enough not to get picked up...and I'm lucky I was able to get back to him."

"Mother's very careful about me," came the boy's addition. He was burning with questions, she didn't need him to have a tadpole to tell that, but he seemed to understand it wasn't a good time to do so.

Tav looked up at Astarion, studying his face, waiting--for a sign, of what, she wasn't sure. "It might be a good idea for you to travel with us. I'm simply making sure we've checked for any possible survivors before we go to the druid grove up north for a few things we might need. And then--"

"To the creche," Lae'zel said.

"Yes, the creche," Tav echoed.

"Well...I was ready to go this alone, but...perhaps sticking with the herd is a good idea. Alright. I accept. Lead on."

He doesn't remember. He can't, he'd have reacted with more if he did, Tav thought as she turned around to lead the group back northward. It's fine. It's fine. If he doesn't remember that makes it easier.

Still, that ache in her chest...

Not Shadowheart, not Lae'zel, not Astarion...not Gortash, or he'd have come looking for me by now. I hope it's no one important...hrm, but it could be Withers. I know for certain HE remembers, because he did when we came back. I could be worrying over all this for nothing!

As they crossed the ruined nautiloid, though, Tav's thoughts turned to Gale. There was no point in dwelling overmuch on who remembered now--Withers being that fourth person made so much sense that there was a tightness in her chest she didn't want to ponder overmuch. Better to shove it back, better to stop thinking about it. Better to imagine the worst possible scenario -- that was what had been happening since Orin's escape a decade ago.

---------------------------------

The waypoint's sigil was swirling with magic, just as it was before. Tav reached up to touch it before any of the others could tell her to stop--it zapped her, and as she drew back in pain, a hand emerged from the center of it.

"Someone's stuck," she said. For a moment she considered asking Lae'zel for help, but she brushed the thought off. She could do this on her own.

"How d'you know, mother?" Cald asked.

"Well, if he wasn't, he'd have gotten out already."

"You seem certain it belongs to a he..." Shadowheart added.

"Well, look at that hand--" Tav spoke quickly, and mentally scolded herself for saying so much. She turned back to the hand, grabbed it, and hauled it back as hard as she could.

Gale came forward, fell onto the ground, and didn't speak for a few moments. He got unsteadily to his feet, and gave an awkward smile.

"Hello...I'm Gale, of Waterdeep."

Not Gale.

"Apologies...usually better at this."

"There's nothing to apologize for," Tav waved it off, "Are you well? That looks like it was painful."

"A bit shocked, but...it's a relief and a pleasure to make your acquaintance!"

"I was...on the nautiloid," she went on, "I assume you were too? Perhaps had an unpleasant visitor in the form of a worm in the eye? And before you ask, yes, I'm aware it'll turn us into mindflayers...none of us have the capability to cure this condition, either, and we count both myself and Shadowheart here among the class of clerics."

Gale seemed surprised at her quick handling of the situation, but seemed to recover and said, "Then how about we lend each other a helping hand and look for a healer capable of handling our affliction together? A parasite shared is a...parasite halved...or something to that effect. And before you think yourself to be traveling with an ill-mannered man--thank you for pulling me out of that stone. It was an act of foresighted kindness, I assure you. I have the feeling that ample opportunities will present themselves for me to return the favor."

"You're the wizard--I mean, A wizard, aren't you?" Cald asked suddenly, unable to contain himself any longer. He stiffened when Tav squeezed at his shoulder. "I mean, you look magical is all."

"A correct assumption, my dear lad. Perhaps you aspire to be one?"

"I'm not a wizard, I'm a sorceror. Mother says so," he gave an eager smile. "But she says wizards can teach you lots of things about the Weave."

Tav gave a slight little smile of her own. "We're getting a bit crowded here, aren't we? Fair amount of us...Lae'zel, I know you would prefer we get a move on, but--perhaps I could trust you to find us a good campsite--defensible, I mean. With all the goblin activity I want to be sure we're not sitting ducks when we lay our heads down for the night. It'll take us some time to get the things we need from the druid grove anyway, and I was hoping to see if any of them might know of a healer for our condition. Not that I don't mean to visit the creche! But...it is good not to rely too much on only one plan. Supposing the creche is not there because the ship took all of them, for example, or...they moved on."

Lae'zel couldn't seem to find anything to argue against in this plan. She promised to locate a decent campsite and then return to them in the druid grove to inform them of its location once she'd finished.

On our way. Good. Good.

There was an itch beneath Tav's skin she couldn't quite identify, an uneasiness that wouldn't go away. It didn't seem to be connected to anything in particular, but it didn't calm down as they headed north.

Halsin. They'd be seeing Halsin soon.

You could not be more transparent, my dear. Tell the truth. You were afraid he might be the one to remember, weren't you?

She shivered at the sound of Raphael's words repeating in her mind, but tried to shake them off anyway.

She failed, but felt a mite better for having tried.

#tav is making little mistakes #surface pressure is her theme song at this point #tav #vitiligo drow tav #shadowheart #laezel #fanfiction #bg3 fanfic #bg3 fanfiction #astarion #gale #gale dekarios #gale of waterdeep #archive of our own #ao3fic #nautiloid #tadpole

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hjemve · 1 year

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Hello, my name is Emory! I’m 25+, Canadian, use they/he, & have been RPing on tumblr since est. 2012. This is a highly selective, low-activity roleplay blog for my original character, "The Vagrant". An exorcist wanderer with mysterious, otherworldly powers. Set in medieval fantasy. Ex-villain. Follows from @bcneheaded. Heavily Dark & Religious themes will be present. Please read the info and rules page before following! (This blog uses the beta post editor!)

HELPFUL LINKS:

✦ Prologue. ✦ Memes ✦ Opens ✦ Interest Tracker ✦ pinterest board

OTHER BLOGS YOU MAY KNOW ME FROM

✧ @polyphagist / @boarish / @aeipcthy / @ccnfessional

✧ mobile friendly rules + muse info under the cut ✧

RULES:

➤ Well hey! My name is Emory; I’m 28 (they or he please!). Thanks for coming to read this! I’ll try to keep it as brief as I can. This is a highly selective, low-activity blog for an OC of mine. Created, developed and loved by me! :)

➤ When sending memes/asks/liking for a starter, please try to specify a muse that you're interacting with if you're a multi-muse blog, otherwise you may be ignored, or I may prioritize others before you

➤ I work a full-time job, and often struggle with my mental health, as well as deal with chronic pain – I may take a long time to respond both ooc and ic because of this; I apologize in advance. It’s not because I don’t want to write or talk with you, I promise! I’m also quite forgetful, so don’t be afraid to nudge me if I haven’t gotten back to you in a few days time; but on the same breath, please don’t hound me for responses.

➤ This blog is generally Mutuals-Only. Plotting and dms are reserved for mutuals only, but ask memes and open starters (unless tagged “mutuals only”) are open to anyone. Mutuals will be prioritized though.

➤ I’m not follow for follow, so that means I only follow those that I’m interested in writing with! I also read everyone’s rules and character information before following/interacting, and expect the same from others. I won’t follow those without a rules page or a finished (or mostly at least) character info page; I like to know who I’m writing with! I also follow from @bcneheaded as that is the main blog this one is attached to. If I follow you there, it's safe to assume I'm interested in interacting here as well!

➤ I ask you to please do not repeatedly unfollow and refollow me (or likewise like/unlike things) to get my attention; this behavior will result in a hardblock. Please communicate with me if you need or want something.

➤ Triggers will be tagged as trigger tw. Things I need you to tag for me are ped*philia, and emetophobia (irrational fear of v*mit** For me, in example… Saying you threw up is OK, but do not discuss or describe it any further than that please. Thank you.] ) If you deliberately ignore or frequently forget this rule, you will be blocked and anything we have will be dropped.

➤ Quality over quantity! But of course, please don’t give me a sentence in return for a couple paragraphs. On a similar note, I have the tendency to ramble. So please don’t feel the need to match my length if I’ve gone off and made the thread quite long. I’ll be happy with just about anything you give in return!

➤ Ships will be based on chemistry, and are possible here. Though given the nature of the muse, it may be a very long game, or a difficult thing to initiate. Discussion for pre-established relationships of any sort are super welcome and encouraged.

➤ I love continuing ask memes as threads and I definitely encourage you to do so if you’d like to (though it’s not necessary!) as it’s a great way to break the ice and start something in general. If you do though, I only ask that you do so on a new text post, @ my username, and possibly put it in the tags as well. I’ll like the post to let you know I’ve seen it, so if I don’t, don’t be afraid to ask to see if I have or not; we all know tumblr’s a little (a lot) funky, so I may have missed it!

➤ I don’t do drama, so please don’t involve me in it. Any passive aggressive or hateful asks or messages will be ignored and whoever it is sending it will be blocked. The anonymous feature is a privilege, please don’t abuse it.

➤ NSFW content of sexual nature might appear on this blog, but probably not often as I don’t often participate in those kinds of threads/they don't last long if I do. But if I do, it will be tagged as “ ( nsft ) ” and will only be done with people I’m close with or have discussed it with beforehand. NSFW themes may be more likely to appear in terms of DARK themes, as this muse is horror based. (depictions and mention of torture, existentialism, death, abuse, demonic imagery, religious themes etc will all appear here.) But these will be tagged as such. The catchall tag will be “ ( horror tw ) ”

~ These rules subject to change over time, but if/when they do I’ll be sure to make a post about it to let ya know! Thank you for your time; it’s appreciated!

_____

General Information:

- Name/Aliases: "The Vagrant". "Crow Caller", "Wanderer" - Age: 30-40 - Family: None - Place of Birth: The Kingdom of Amaran - Gender: Cis Male - Current residence: Thread dependent. Everywhere. - Personality/Attitude: Melancholy, quiet, impatient, violent, reckless, secretive, cold, sarcastic, wrathful; generous, determined, calm, loyal, diligent, dauntless, resourceful, empathetic, witty. - Abilities/Talents: >*Exorcism (the ability to weaken, expel dark entities from a person, place, or thing, and send it back to where it came from). > Annihilation (the ability to completely destroy dark entities.). > Puppeteer (ability to control darkness and/or dark entities.), > Necromancy (the ability to raise corpses or call upon spirits.), >***Demon's Essence (he is the product of a disaster that merged his human soul with the essence of a demonic lord; he has almost all of it's abilities. He just needs to discover and hone them, or eventually be consumed by it. Because he is spliced with a powerful demon, lesser dark entities may be forced to obey him if he wills or commands it.) , > "Crow caller" (can summon and command any number of crows. Act as a hive minded entity if more than one is summoned & have otherworldly abilities. They behave like normal animals.) >*Enhanced senses (has the ability to detect life signs, see in the dark, & has overall enhanced senses, mostly but not exclusively in the portions of his body that have already been consumed by the demonic essence). >**Human Soul (because he still possesses his humanity and soul, he is largely unaffected by holy items [such as crosses, holy water, etc] prayers or holy phrases or passages [cannot be banished/exorcised], and can walk unharmed on consecrated grounds. Can also use Light/Holy based abilities due to the human portion of his soul, though at the cost of his stamina.), >"Leech" (has the ability to draw power from consuming the blood of other powerful creatures at no cost to himself), >Magical resistance (is resistant to most forms of magic, but is generally invulnerable to most forms of fire.) >*Immortal. (he has lost the ability to die of natural causes such as illness, poisons, and age, making him effectively immortal unless destroyed.) ++ more undiscovered / unlisted - Weaknesses: Using his own abilities worsens his condition (every time he draws purely from the powers from the demonic essence, it consumes his soul and body a little faster. Consuming demon/monster/etc blood for power slows the rate of decay slightly), Holy fire (the only fire, along with fire summoned by fae, with the ability to harm him), Has magical resistance, but isn't invulnerable, Weak against ice and electricity, It's very likely he'll eventually be consumed by the demonic essence if he cannot control it (or dies), and the demon he was spliced with will return to life (&likewise with all of the vagrant's abilities and knowledge) but in this realm instead of its own... it is crucial he does not die, lest the rest of the world end up like Amaran. - Fears: The demon essence, demonic gods/lords, the underworld (hell), his identity being discovered, loss of control, holy entities, ... deep water.- Hobbies/Interests: travelling, drinking, sex, meditating, training, reading any books he can get his hands on... not much else. - Religion/Beliefs: Faithless. Uncertain what to believe in - Sexual Preference: Pansexual. - Occupation: travelling exorcist / none / a vagrant

-----

Backstory:

(Prologue.)

wip

#( pinned post )#( ooc )#( muse info )#( rules )#please always keep in mind that this character is a former BBEG !!! like THE BBEG of his story . except he /succeeded/.! unfortunately #hes forced to try to be different lest he do more damage than desired w how he is now <3

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smitcr · 1 year

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𓅖𓆓𓂧𓐦𓀭 ≈ "ꜱᴍɪᴛᴇʀ", "ᴄʀᴜꜱʜᴇʀ".

─ indie rp blog for the ancient Egyptian god, "ᴍᴇᴅᴊᴇᴅ" (mḏd, or metchet). An obscure god of punishment and smiting. Private, Selective, low-activity, lighthearted, & primarily iconless. Sideblog to @bcneheaded. Loved by Emory. * beta only user. Primarily Moonknight related, but otherwise fandomless.

✧ mobile friendly rules + muse info under the cut ✧

RULES:

➤ Well hey! My name is Emory; I’m 27 (they or he please!). Thanks for coming to read this! I’ll try to keep it as brief as I can. This is a selective, low-activity blog for an OC of mine. Created, developed and loved by me! :)

➤ When sending memes/asks please try to specify a muse that you're interacting with if you're a multi-muse blog, otherwise you may be ignored, or I may prioritize others before you.

➤ This blog is Mutuals-Only. General rule of thumb is that if you're followed by @bcneheaded, then we're mutuals here and on any of my sideblogs that you decide to follow! However, though I'll follow from the main blog to indicate mutuals, you are NOT obligated to interact with the main blog. Similarly, if you follow a sideblog but not my main one, or used to follow the mainblog but soft that one + continue following the sideblog I'll just assume you're still cool interacting from that singular blog.

➤ I’m not follow for follow, so that means I only follow those that I’m interested in writing with! I also read everyone’s rules and character information before following/interacting, and expect the same from others. I won’t follow those without a rules page or a finished (or mostly at least) character info page; I like to know who I’m writing with! I follow from @bcneheaded as that is the main blog this one is attached to. If I believe you haven't bothered to read my information, I'll likely unfollow/softblock you.

➤ Ships will be based on chemistry and mun to mun comfort, and are possible here. Though given the nature of the muse, it may be a bit of a long game, or a difficult thing to initiate. Discussion for pre-established relationships of any sort are super welcome and encouraged though! He's never been in love before

➤ I love continuing ask memes as threads and I definitely encourage you to do so if you’d like to. I likely won't offer starters, so these are a great way to break the ice. Just be sure to @ me if you do continue something!

➤ NSFW content of sexual nature is very unlikely to appear here... but ya never know I guess. NSFW themes may be more likely to appear in terms of DARK themes, as this muse is horror based. (depictions and mention of death, parental death, violence, animal death, etc will all appear here.) But these kinds of things will be tagged as such. The catchall tag will be “ ( horror tw ) ” if it warrants it.

~ These rules subject to change over time, but if/when they do I’ll be sure to make a post about it to let ya know! Thank you for your time; it’s appreciated!

_________________

BACKSTORY:

(X) <-- from here, basic info below.

Medjed is a lesser known Egyptian god that had only been rediscovered recently. Not much is known about Medjed as he was written about on very few occasions, unlike most Egyptian gods who are commonly depicted through art, Medjed only has two known pieces of art depicting him. All of this adds to his mysterious nature.

Medjed as the god of punishment, punishing those who do evil deeds including the gods.

Medjed was rediscovered in the Book of the Dead. Medjed for a long period of time was relatively unknown, no other manuscripts mention Medjed. But in 1910 the Greenfield papyrus, a 121 foot mosaic was discovered with the full appearance of Medjed.

When the Greenfield papyrus was shown off in japan, Medjed grew exponentially in popularity in japan. He quickly became a cult icon.

Appearance

Medjed's appearance is commonly described as unknown or unseen. However in the art depicting him Medjed is depicted as a being with a body of cloth, human feet, and two eyes.

As most Egyptian gods are depicted in a side profile, Medjed's frontward facing depiction alienates him from the rest of the gods even more.

Personality

Medjed is commonly described as strange, his general disposition puts most gods at unease. His presence causes all in his path to freeze in fear.

His relationship with Osiris is more friendly however, the two are on friendly terms as Medjed deals out the Justice onto the dead that Osiris presides over.

Despite his status as a god, Medjed's justice isn't only for humans, as he has fought and killed several evil gods in the past.

Myths and Legends

Medjed is a member of the house of Osiris, his role in Du'at is unknown. However in the Book of the Dead he is described as the smiter, in other translations Medjed was described as being someone with great authority, which has led to the belief that Medjed was a god of justice who dulled out punishment to those who did evil.

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youmightaswell · 1 year

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The Similarities and Differences Between Michael Swango and Bryan Kohberger

I have been holding off on writing about this since my phone conversation with serial killer Michael Swango last week. While I have permission to write his thoughts, I have been waiting for a letter or email of his thought so I could take direct quotes from him. Mail is slow and Swango is not super fast about getting snail mail or emails out, so for now I will put my and his thoughts down here and then amend or add when I get his actual in-writing information.

And of course, we all know Swango was convicted of four murders and admits to more than 60, while Kohberger has said he hasn’t done anything wrong and has not had a trial yet. So for now this is just an exercise Swango and I did, based only on what we know about Kohberger so far, assuming that he is indeed the perpetrator of such murderous misdeeds. I’m not going to type in “alleged killer” over and over, so please keep “alleged” in mind when reading below. Also, please note when writing on my personal Tumblr I do not proof or edit, so there will be typos.

Swango and I (and I think we can all agree) that anyone who can kill so callously, seemingly without reason, is a sociopath/psychopath. In order for that to make sense you’d need to understand the characteristics of one. https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/antisocial-personality-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20353928

A person with antisocial personality disorder does not need to have ALL the characteristics but would have many. I’m not a psychologist.

When I first started my Letters from the Inside project one of my requirements was to only write to those who had high IQs. Both Swango and Kohberger had advanced degrees and were academics. While Swango was an actual doctor, Kohberger studied psychology and immersed himself in criminology, going so far as applying for a police internship before the murders, hoping to assist law enforcement in technological profiling. Swango immersed himself in both the EMT community and the medical one.

Both are remembered as being “odd” by other students.

Both Swango and Kohberger would seem to be glib – Swango is known for his (superficial) charm and while we haven’t heard Kohberger being charming, we did hear him say a few very glib things like when asked why he had gone into Idaho he said, “The shopping is better in Idaho.” He also allegedly used famed serial killer Gacy line when arrested, asking if anyone else was arrested.

Another characteristic is addiction or compulsive behavior – Kohberger was said to have once had a heroin addiction. Swango, had a mother with severe alcoholism and he even wrote to me about how this upset him while he was growing up. Another compulsion they both seemed to share is that Kohberger was a strict vegan and described by his relatives as requesting them buy new pans that never touched meet. Kohberger has reportedly been overweight and bullied and now appeared compulsive about staying slim and watching what he eats. Swango used to drop down and do exercise in class, becoming the butt of fellow students’ jokes. He was reportedly a food hoarder, keeping tons of rotting sandwiches under his bed.

Swango told me he had boundless energy throughout his killing days. He could work a 12-hour shift at the hospital or even a double and then stay up all night. It was reported Kohberger also was up all night, oftentimes vacuuming at 1am and going out all night driving.

I think a major difference between the two is that Swango was known to be very good looking and was quite a ladies man, juggling several women at a time. It appears, at least for now, that Kohberger did not have an significant others at the time of the murder and so far no one from his past has seemed to come forward discussing how he was in an intimate relationship. There have been jusa few friends, students and one Tinder date he had who came forward so far.

Swango believes that he and Kohberger share a similar reason for their seemingly random killings: Both were narcissists who got an almost orgasmic (not necessarily a sexual charge) feeling of being the smartest person in the room for even a brief period of time. While Swango says very clearly he did not specifically target people he had feelings about – such as anger or jealously – he only killed or poisoned people out of opportunity. It was about the glee he felt being able to try to get away with someone under others’ noses. He believes Kohberger shared this sense of glee and overinflated sense of intelligence and cunning.

Swango was clearly a serial killer and he said his first inklings of it were at the start of college. While we have no idea if Kohberger has committed anything else and not gotten caught, I think it is pretty safe to say he may have done this again if not caught.

Swango entered the military prior to med school and Kohberger’s yearbook says he, “Wants to use his skills to become Army Ranger someday.”

Another difference is that Swango had trouble with the law prior to killing. He was arrested for poisoning EMTs long before he ever was arrested for murdering patients. It appears Kohberger had a clean arrest record. Swango also falsified documents to get his medical license, jobs, etc. So far we see no evidence of Kohberger ever lying, being deceptive, etc.

This is only the start. In the next year I’m sure more and more will be revealed about Kohberger leading to a trial. I’m interested in hearing what Swango has to say about himself and Kohberger as well.

Generally, l I feel it’s noteworthy that I am in a rather unique position to have direct access to an infamous serial killer to weigh in on this topic. It’s pretty unique to be able to call someone who had perpetrated diabolical crimes on the scale of Kohberger’s (obviously Swango’s were more numerous that Kohberger’s.)

***

This just came in from Swango:

The IDAHO suspect MUST begin with a famous quote that KNOW you've seen. To paraphrase:

"He who stares into the ABYSS must be careful that the ABYSS does not stare into him."

WHEN you find the exact quotation and author PLEASE send it to me. Thanks.

I want to say NIETZSCHE but not sure. John Douglas used it in one of his FBI BSU profiler books. I believe the IDAHO suspect became SO fasinated by criminology that he FELL INTO the ABYSS. Unfortunately, he apparently forgot EVERYTHING he had learned about DNA/ cameras/ cars/ etc. Will try to write more, but that is the gist.

This just came in from Swango (updated: 1/10/23)

Few more points on the

“differences” you queried: After “falling into the abyss”, our young PhD student (Apparently) METICULOUSLY PLANNED the IDAHO crime. And as mentioned, DESPITE his knowledge and planning, made numerous fatal errors.

With a few notable exceptions (i.e., the dentist/ doctor), DR. X [EDITOR NOTE: Swango calls himself Dr. X] acted randomly based on current situation and conditions. Blink of an eye. Permission to use info and/or name.

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donquixote505 · 2 years

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Tuesday people

Complex

/ˈkɒmplɛks/

a related group of repressed or partly repressed emotionally significant ideas which cause psychic conflict leading to abnormal mental states or behavior.

If i had to pick one word to describe the book it will be (Complex), yet it was straightforward and in easy language with simple ideas noting you never heard nothing mind blowing neither revolutionary but yet it strike you as complex book. Probably because coach (yes yet I never met him but in my mind his also “coach” to me) Morrie had such view on life 78 years of living and the knowledge of the fatal day might granted this old man the ability to look at life in such carefree pov.

Touching base on a lot of subjects! I mean we had 14 Tuesday's. and I had 3 topic to collaborate on.

1- Culture norms: "The standards we live by. They are the shared expectations and rules that guide behavior of people within social groups."

Friedrich Nietzsche once said when he was talking about authenticity, we build our character by trying coping role model's as per society stander in the attempt to become perfect and not taking into account all part of ourselves, the good the bad the ugly.

A one should sculp him/her self into something that they chooses, or as coach said "develop your own culture which give u meaning"

the hell with society stander moving forward we embrace Authenticity we embrace our true-self.

"No price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself."

2- Tension of Opposites, I found great joy listing to coach view on the subject as I struggle from things like conflict, going over something for a very long, weighing pros and cons till my mind gets fried. (if you wondering why i struggle from such things? Ask my zodiac sign it’s the one to blame "hint" if you know astrology will figure it out)

anyway back to the subject the Idea of wondering over something for a very long then the conflict between do we base our decision on what others want of us, or based on what we see or feel right? one time i heard that there will be people who will love you and people who will hates you and people who will careless about you. so better to accept that you can't and shouldn't aim to please them but to accept yourself as you are and the hell with the rest.

3- Last one I'll make it short it about emotion and death.

coach advice us to charge fully with our emotion and not holdback due to fear. "Fear dose not prevent death, it prevent life" this is something I said to someone dear to me recently so I got touched when Mitch mentioned it in the book as I absolutely agree with everything he said on the subject. on the other thing DEATH. I got hooked with idea of a little bird on the shoulder every mornin' reminding me am I ready? did I left things unsettled assuming that I would have many years to unsettle them? I'm very eager to try this one out and of curse I'll be reading more on the budda view on death as I wish to learn how to die. so I can unlock my full potential in life.

Again Great book, love the synergy and harmony between the (Tuesday people) as they prefers to call themselves. and I'll make sure to have a tuesday or wednsday nights of my own reflecting my life.

Sincerely,

Donquixote 505

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maynardqdzcurry · 2 years

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'Made in....Earth' - Rami Beracha

Rami Beracha's blog on the venture capital market. Rami is also the Co-Founder at Sosa. The issue of miscommunication is serious. It's a minefield of our own making. It starts within a few seconds after coming into contact with someone and then ends with an incredible explosion... Our biggest mistake is that, for no reason at all, we always assume complete alignment in the expectations of both sides without even trying to get our partner's brain to understand what his expectations of us are. One thing we do have in common is that our counterpart doesn't miss an opportunity to increase the gap in expectations ..... We have not been notified by anyone. There are a variety of reasons for confusion. They usually are related to our individual personas. The squared personality is more likely than liberal personalities to be misinformed, while individuals who are aggressive may have difficulty in coordinating expectations with passive. It is simple to recognize that squared personalities can be distinguished from liberals, and aggressive can be distinguished from passive. What if they're very different? They'll not realize that. Consider if there's an individual gap. This isn't something anyone has investigated or warned about, nor traced. ! Ladies and gentlemen! I'd like to present to you a brand new personality kind that we all have in common. The FULL CIRCLE personalities differ from the HALF CLIRCLE types. ! Rami Beracha Note - A behavioral guidance when reading the following analysis, try to figure out which one of the two personalities describe you best and at the same time look for out the person who your life partner is. If you realize that you are of distinct types that you can be satisfied. This could be the reason behind the differences you have. If, however, you are both of the same kind and you're both of the same type, then I'm not able to provide a reason for the reason why your relationships appear so awful. So, here we begin... Humans are divided into two categories. Some of us can be split into two groups one of which is self-contained while others feel completely at home. Sure, he's required to be with someone and yes, he's always seeking one. Absolutely! All true ... But, until he's found his dream partner, he can live without one. And, once he has discovered one, he'd like to continue living his life, shoulder to shoulder with his hopefully complete circle of a partner. The other aspect of humanity is made up of "half-a-circle" kind of people that are (no this isn't full circles that were damaged during the delivery) (see below) ... It's true they are in need of partners, yes, they want to find a partner very badly, and yes, they're in constant and almost religious search to find a suitable partner... and yes, it's as important for national security that they find their partner because they simply cannot survive without one. They won't let go once they've found their unhappy companion. They will attempt to live with their victim as if they were one of them and refuse to give up the idea of living in harmony. The Halves aren't content with any less than gazing at each other from a distance of zero distance for the rest. It is impossible to make them feel more intimate than that. https://finder.startupnationcentral.org/program_page/sosa An interesting distinction between the two types relates to the choice to let go of the person you are with. The complete circle will usually be quick to let go of the partner with whom they've lost chemistry. Half-a-circle types will, however, redefine what 'having mutually chemistry with their partner' to mean - 'im still holding onto this B..ST..RD until I am able replace them with an appropriate upgrade'. Imagine a dance in which a half-a-circle and a full circle are trying to please their partner. The Half can take two steps forward past the safety zone. This unexpected invasion into his personal space is somewhat scary. So he fixes this zone-invasion-problem by making a gentle step backward. He took the Half out of his comfortable zone . Although the Half thinks that the Full made a error, and kindly compensated by making another step ahead, the Half is more concerned and begins to feel irritated. They can understand why, but because they don't know the proper terminology they can't adequately explain their confusion and head to the wrong directions. They could have saved themselves if they had known the distinction between Half and Full. רמי ברכה There isn't a single conclusion to this essay , but there are some action items: https://www.indlyster.com/rami-beracha-dubai/ 1. Find out who you are. 2. Learn who your partner is רמי ברכה 3. Be aware of the difference. 3. Respect that distinction! Rami Beracha One conclusion could be drawn"Live and let live..

#Rami Beracha

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zhenjun · 3 years

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white people, your cosplay is yellowface

Content warning: images of yellowface that may be upsetting below

Note: I have made the decision to remove the images of modern-day cosplayers. I stand by my initial choice to include them, as I believe actually seeing images of modern cosplay side by side with “real” yellowface was essential to understanding the point. However, this post has gotten much more attention than I ever anticipated. I had, at the time of making it, fewer than 30 followers.

In addition to harassment from sockpuppet accounts, assertions that my opinion on racism is less important because I am in the diaspora, misinterpretation about what this post was initially about (several people claimed cultural appropriation), threats to report and suspend me, and, apparently, discussion on twitter, for my own mental health, I am taking these images down.

I will no longer be responding to criticism or questions on the post, but I will happily answer DMs or asks on the subject. If you disrespect this or try to start more discourse, you are getting blocked, not because I want to silence your voice, but because I am a real person who can choose not to engage with people for reasons as seemingly unfair as my mental health and not wanting to continue filling my blog with the same post that honestly is upsetting for me to look at (as I already stated within the post).

If you have been blocked by me it is either due to disrespect and/or some form of unrelated drama due to how I like to interact with fandoms (i.e. ships like Ch*ngxian, Xu*xiao), not because I am trying to silence you. As I have so few followers, I am sure you can make your own post and gain even more traction than I did.

If you are white, please stop cosplaying MDZS/TGCF characters. It often looks like/is yellowface, and honestly there’s no way to respectfully do it when these media are based so heavily on Chinese culture. I’ll try to sum up why these fandoms need to be more mindful. You can find links and citations at the bottom that read best on my desktop blog theme.

The goal of yellow face in the past wasn’t always to look “authentically Asian;” white directors, actors, set designers, and playwrights set out to use what pieces of East Asian culture they found most inspiring, fun, cool, violent, or backward. Sometimes, white people had "good" intentions" with their use of yellowface and were not "trying" to demean our cultures, but the practice itself did so regardless.

To summarize, white people of the past did yellowface to erase our identities, take aspects of our culture that they liked, or ridicule us. Most modern-day cosplayers are doing the first two.

Below are examples of early Hollywood yellowface and modern-day theater, as well as modern-day cosplay:

[Previously pictured was a white Xie Lian cosplayer who was very receptive after seeing this post and has since removed these images from their social media. If you happen upon any of their cosplay or other social media, please do not send them any hate.]

As you can see actress Katharine Hepburn in “Dragon Seed”[1][2] is in very traditionally inspired Chinese clothing. The previously pictured Xie Lian cosplayer was in a similar hat and wearing white robes. They both had some sort of eye makeup; Katharine Hepburn darkened her hair for the role while the cosplayer was wearing a dark-brown/black wig.

Of note, the character Katharine Hepburn plays in "Dragon Seed" is supposed to be positive; an adaption from (white) author Pearl S. Buck's novel about a brave Chinese woman who stands up to Japanese imperialism. Like modern day cosplayers of Chinese media, just because the white people creating this film did not intend to be harmful does not change that it was yellowface and racist.

[Previously pictured was a before and after picture of a white Xue Yang cosplayer with blue eyes, brown hair, half of which was dyed blonde in the before image. In the after, they were wearing a long black wig, heavy eye makeup, newly shaped and darkened eyebrows, and robes made to emulate CQL in warm lighting]

Here are before and after pictures of actress Katharine Hepburn in 1944[3] and, previously, was a white Xue Yang cosplayer in 2020. Both had altered their eyes and eyebrows as well as donned black wigs or darkened hair.

[Previously pictured was a Jiang Yanli cosplayer in a black wig and robes meant to emulate the donghua]

Yellowface does not always involve modification to the eyes. In these two images, neither Mary Pickford in Madame Butterfly[4] nor the previously shown modern Jiang Yanli cosplayer have done anything noticeable to shape their eyes. They were, however, both wearing black wigs with traditionally inspired outfits. Jiang Yanli wore a modified version of Tang Dynasty fashion.[5]

[previously pictured was an image of a Wei Wuxian cosplayer with face powdered white and rouge around the eyes. Their eyes were still blue as the Madame Butterfly’s were on the left, and they were wearing a long black wig as well as robes designed to emulate his. This image has been replaced and amended with an additional example of modern theater; the production of The Mikado where one actor is wearing a black wig, the other a Japanese inspired hat, and both are wearing Japanese robes]

The final comparison was an example of a stage actress from the 2015 Fargo-Moorehead Opera production for Madame Butterfly[6] on the left (the earlier movie is an adaptation of the play). [This image was previously erroneously attributed to the Knoxville Opera which faced backlash for their production as they had an all-white cast depicting actors in yellowface in 2019.][7]

Honestly, these images just had a strange similarity to me so that’s why I chose to put these two together. Most importantly, was the similarity in makeup, hair, and East Asian clothing. Though the image is not there any longer, but just google Mo Xuanyu cosplays and ask yourself, if you didn’t know the fandom, would you be able to spot the difference of which one is supposed to be worse?

The new image is just another example of modern yellowface in theater, where the actors do not necessarily wear extensive eye makeup to emulate East Asians but, much like modern cosplayers, nonetheless are trying to look like the Asian characters they play in a Seattle production of The Mikado.[8]

As you can see, it’s pretty sad and disturbing to see how the rise of East Asian media is creating a new modern wave of yellowface. I think white people tend to think that black/brown/yellowface is only about darkening the skin, but that is just not what many depictions of yellowface have been for East and Southeast Asian people.

I know a lot of people recognize this is wrong and I appreciate those of you that do, but if you didn’t recognize the past parallels, please read up on the links below! Researching this was honestly triggering and emotionally taxing and caused a mild breakdown, so if you clown on this post you’re getting blocked.

Despite the post losing effectiveness to an extent from taking down the modern day photos, I suggest a quick google search of cosplays from the series during/after reading this. And if you don't agree with me, feel free to block and don't send more hate to me! I'm not trying to get into fights. I just wanna feel like I have a semi-safe space in the fandom but if this annoys you, it's better to just block me.

HISTORY, Casting White People in Asian Roles Goes Back Centuries[↩︎]︎

Youtube, Dragon Seed (1944) Trailer [↩︎]︎

NBC News, 'Correcting Yellowface': One Woman's Project to Fix Whitewashing[↩︎]︎

IMDB[↩︎]

Stony Brook University, The Influence of Chang-An Culture to Korea and Japan: Cultural Diffusion in the Glorious Age of Tang Dynasty[↩︎]

Howard Sherman, Yellowface Bait-And-Switch With ‘Madama Butterfly’ In Fargo[↩︎]︎

OnStage Blog, Knoxville Opera Forgets It's 2019 and Opts for Yellowface for "Madame Butterfly"[↩︎]︎

Seattle Times, The yellowface of “The Mikado” in your face[↩︎]︎

#mdzs #tgcf #the untamed #racism #madame butterfly #dragon seed #❁#yellowface #when I describe the behavior in the note please do not assume it is about you if you've interacted with me #there are probably dozens of people I've interacted with who I may have already blocked etc.

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wenellyb · 3 years

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Is Sambucky Canon or Not?

TL;DR: Yes, it is

I've seen some people saying that they only see friendship between Sam and Bucky, and I can understand that. Because depending on your education, the environment you grew up and the kind of media you’re usually exposed to, you will have a different interpretation of different situations, in real life or in TV. Just let me insert a short story before I dive into the Sambucky topic:

My best friend's uncle is in his fifties and has been living with his roommate (a man) for more than 10 years. They lived together, went on holidays together but officially were just roommates. My best friend wondered if they were a couple, but never talked about it to her parents because it wasn't her business. Two years ago, they decided to come out and get married. My best friend's parents and his parents were genuinely surprised, they were not expecting that, at all, not even a little bit. Let me tell you that it didn’t even cross their mind that it was a possibility, at all. For them, it had always just been two men who had decided to live together because they were single. And preferred to have a roommate rather than living alone.

What I want to say with this story is that people will see what they want to see, or what they're used to see, or what they were raised to see. It’s human.

What I mean is that you will have different perception of a same event, depending on your own circumstances. And I think the writers of TFATWS were counting on that a little bit when it came to Sam and Bucky’s relationship. They obviously didn't want to make some big announcement or big love declaration.

And yes, of course, I have my own circumstances as well, influencing the way I see things. I have shipped SamBucky since Civil War, when they were supposedly enemies. I never expected anything to happen between them on screen. But then they got a show together and I was so so happy about it but I didn't expect anything other than friendship between them.

I was perfectly fine with that because a show was already more than enough: my man Sam Wilson was becoming Captain America, the show was great, the characters were great, their interactions were great, and this wasn't a love story anyway but a superhero show. I thought that here was no way the showrunners would ever go there. I changed my mind after episode 5. I tried to stay objective, but it was clear to me that the writers were hinting at a relationship that went beyond friendship between Sam and Bucky. In some of my previous posts, I explained that there are some scenes and writing choices that make absolutely no sense if you read them as a scene between two friends. I can link them if anyone’s interested.

Side note: I would like to know if one person on this website can tell me what was up with Bucky's behavior with Torres (in episode 5)? What other explanation is there, if not jealousy? It's a scene they chose to keep, so it was probably written this way, there must be a reason. Please I’m begging someone explain it to me. I'm genuinely asking, because otherwise that scene alone is canon Sambucky.

After episode 5, I was convinced they would make Sambucky canon, one way or the other and I started speculating about the ways they could do it. What I said was that if they did make Sambucky canon, they would do it in a very subtle way, in order not to make it too obvious because that’s generally how Marvel movies deal with love stories. And also because they wouldn’t want to scare away their homophobic audience ( I guess Disney needs their money...who knows)

So here are the scenes of how I imagined SamBucky becoming canon and the comparison with reality:

- What I thought we could get : AJ and Cass calling Bucky "Uncle Bucky" - What we got: AJ and Cass running up to Bucky and playing with him. This point is interesting because it’s also related to the point I made about how the environment you grew up in influences your perception of things. I grew up in a big family and I know that, at least in my family, kids don't run up to an adult like that just because it's their uncle’s friend or just because he's nice... There's a real bond there. They haven't seen Bucky just that one time when he slept on the couch. They're obviously close. But some people might just see this as kids being kids. Also, if you watch at how the kids were fake punching him, they were really coordinated with Bucky. They have done this plenty of times. 2.

What I thought we could see: A non-explicit scene where we were supposed to draw our own conclusions. I thought they could show us Bucky staying over for the night, and the last scene would be an empty couch, meaning we would have to understand that Bucky slept in Sam's room this time.

-What we got: Bucky arriving in Sam's car ( A few people on Tumblr pointed out that it was the car Sam was driving in episode 1) So here again we have a scene that a lot of people will not notice. But they still chose to put it there. 3.

What I thought could happen: Sam asking Bucky to stay in Delacroix

What we got: Bucky wrapping things up in New York, as if he was leaving the city for good and coming to Sam's party as if he already knew everyone there. You can read my take on this here. 4. What I thought could happen: The scene in the trailer where we see them looking in the same direction and then we get a shot from very far away where they're holding hands but it’s not so obvious because they are being filmed from a disctance. -What we got: The scene in trailer and then a blurry shot of Sam holding Bucky and then fondling with his neck to find the best spot to rest his hand on. So none of the scenes I was imagining happened exactly like I had imagined, but it felt like all of them happened but in a different versions, which is still crazy to me. If it had been only one scene. I could probably understand the people who see them as just friends. Actually, I still do understand the people who see them as just friends, because everyone has their own interpretation. What I am saying is that they are NOT being portrayed as just friends. There are TOO many scenes in the 6 episodes for it to be a coincidence. One or 2 would be ok but friendship doesn’t explain everything:

The therapy scene (not the therapy scene itself since it was improvised) but the therapist saying she had heard a lot about Sam and wanting them to do a couples’ therapy

Bucky following Sam no matter what

Sam saying ok as soon as Bucky says "do it for me"

Sam asking "what about Bucky?"

Bucky starting to touch Sam whenever he has the chance

Bucky being the one to bringing the suit for Sam

The boat repairing montage

Bucky wanting to stay at Sam's place, when a hotel room would have been more comfortable than a couch

The second day of boat repair in closed quarters with an intense staring scene.

And there are so many other scenes, soft touches, looks,...

These writing choices are not a coincidence, it’s not involuntary, and it’s not fan service ( Fan service is the roll in the flower field scene, or the therapy session). This is them telling a story.

Let’s not even talk about the scenes in Endgame:

Sam comforting bucky at Tony’s funeral

Sam looking up to Bucky for approval before accepting the shield from Steve.

So yes, Sam and Bucky are canon in the sense that Peter and Gamora were canon in the first movie, or Wanda and Vision were canon in Captain Civil War. Meaning that there was no big moment, kiss or anything, but the show is consistently throwing elements clearly showing Sam and Bucky as a romantic item and hinting at a lot more than friendship between them.

It is normal that some people have a different opinion. Because it is extremely rare, in big productions like this to have two male leads with romantic feelings towards each other, so not a lot people who see it will interpret it as such (I don't think it ever happened). You’ll see what you’re used to seeing.

I guess it also depends on what you expect from a love story. For me, the storyline between the characters, their scenes, their chemistry, the way their feelings towards each other are described, are the most important. The kiss scene is just there as a bonus, but I don't need it when the love story is told perfectly. If you’re used to seeing love stories with many kissing scenes, that’s what you will be expecting to see in most love stories.

If you're only used to seeing male friendships in superhero or action movies. The 1000th time you see men interacting in that type of movie or show, you are more likely to assume it is a friendship and nothing more, no matter how many codes and tropes usually associated with romantic movies, the writers and show makers are using.

Add to that the conviction that Disney would never approve Sambucky in a million years, and there you go, I can understand the people who see only friendship.

But, just think about it, if we had the same show, same scenes, same dialogues, but minus the action scenes and the project was being marketed as an Indie movie, would you think they were just friends or a blossoming couple?

If you read Sambucky’s relationship like a friendship: some scenes don't make sense. If you read it like a developing romantic relationship: it all makes sense. "When you hear hoofs, think horse, not zebra" If a writer or a film director chooses a last scene with a romantic setting and the two leads are staring at a sunset, smiling repeatedly at each other and then walking away together with one of them touching the other's neck, with a love song in the background, maybe friendship isn't the first thought they had in mind.

Some people may say “I see them as just friends” and other people may say “ I see them as lovers” and both are fine, because people have different perceptions, and that’s ok.

What I am saying is this post is that the show and the writers are portraying them as more than just friends, they’re portraying them as two characters who are romantically involved.

Perceive what you want but that’s how they are being presented in the show.

Bucky’s therapist said that the exercise she gave them was for couples who want to figure out what kind of life they want to build together. Then, the show ends with Sam and Bucky, staring at a sunset together, looking in the same direction.

“Love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction. “ - Antoine de Saint-Exupery

What else do you need???

This show had more romance than half of the Marvel projects out there. Not every love story needs a kiss (for now...)

We'll see in their next projects which direction the writers want to go with this. But since it was said that the writer on the movie is the same as the writer from episode 5, there's no doubt in my mind that we'll keep seeing this dynamic. I don't think they would have made the same choices if this had been a movie. But I won't complain that we got this. I hope they keep this going even if it stays subtle like in the show. Just hope they will add one explicit scene where one of the characters acknowledges their relationship. But even if we only ever get this show, it’s already a great love story. Let me know what you guys think and sorry for the typos and grammar mistakes, I was tired when I wrote the last part. I hope it still makes sense!

If you think they're only being portrayed as friends let me know why! I would also like to know about the way you see this!

#sambucky #sam wilson #bucky barnes #tfatws #the falcon and the winter soldier #tfatws spoilers #Please feel free to comment on this and tell me what you think #I'm genuinely interested in having other POVs

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themagnuswriters · 3 years

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Asexuality in Fic Roundtable - What We Like

How do I write a convincing asexual character in a fic? Is there a way to address a character’s sexuality outside the context of sex or coming out? Can a story feature a character's asexuality aside from exploring the negative aspects of the asexual experience? It’s usually not too hard to find lists of what not to do when writing asexual characters, but much more difficult to find the opposite.

The asexual members of The Magnus Writers discord gathered to discuss their favorite ways to incorporate the day-to-day details of asexual peoples’ experiences into fiction. We also discussed depictions that we’ve enjoyed in the past, or would love to see more of. Note that this isn’t an Asexuality 101 resource, so if you don’t feel familiar with the basics, feel free to check out the resources we will link in the reblog of this post.

This conversation included a variety of ace-spectrum people from multiple countries, including both arospec and non-aro people, various genders, and varying relationships to sex and sexual content. Just like all asexual people are different, the things that we enjoy reading are far from universal. Some tropes/details brought up as favorites can vary widely--for example, “innuendo completely flies over their head” vs. “they understand but are completely unfazed by innuendo.” Additionally, some aces love tropes that others would prefer to avoid: for instance some enjoy discussions of physical boundaries to be included in the fic, and some prefer that to be established as happening in the past.

The examples brought up in our discussion are also far from comprehensive, and can be seen as the beginning of an endless list of possible ways to write asexual characters. Some examples given are specific to the Magnus Archives, but can apply to any writing. Take these as inspiration and a way to broaden your understanding of who we are and what we like to see!

ASEXUALITY IN YOUR SETTING

When writing a story including asexual characters, one of your first considerations may be for how asexuality is contextualized within your setting: Is it fully normalized and accepted? Does it reflect real-world stigmas? How is asexuality treated by the narrative and the other characters? Contributors showed interest in a variety of approaches on this front, with no single approach being worth more than other:

Fics including negative real-world experiences

These would include fics in a realistic setting, where characters may struggle with internalized acephobia, stigma, social pressure, microaggressions, dysphoria, and so on. This isn’t limited to just “issue fic,” where the focus of the fic is about examining and confronting a struggle, but rather encompasses anything that includes this consideration in its worldbuilding and characterization. While brighter settings can be refreshing, contributors described reasons why this kind of fic appeals to them:

Feeling seen: Reading about ace characters whose experiences reflect their own

Feeling validated: Being exposed to only stories where there are no issues on this front can feel like we’re the only one facing these struggles. It can be extremely cathartic to read something and think “I thought I was the only person who went through this.”

Exploring improvement/hope: From ace characters learning to accept themselves or other characters making mistakes and accepting correction, these can be validating and encouraging.

On top of ace readers finding worth in these fics, the act of writing the fic can also be very cathartic for many ace authors.

There is a lot of variety for how these fics can be written, such as:

Stories that focus on the negative experience

Stories where that experience is just part of the setting or characterization

The character(s) getting external support and validation

The character facing mixed dismissiveness, acceptance, prejudice, etc. from different people

The story resolving in a way where the situation is resolved: for instance, cutting off an acephobic relationship, or someone apologizing for a microaggression.

Stories where well-meaning characters are accidentally insensitive about asexuality, but learn better and change their behavior

The character confronting or overcoming an internal struggle

Stories where the issues aren’t fully resolved by the end, such as an insecurity not fully going away.

Negative asexual experiences don’t have to be the focus of a fic to be acknowledged. While “issue fics” that closely examine and explore these experiences are valuable, contributors also described enjoying stories that included them as simply an element of the worldbuilding or characterization. For instance, a story may reference Jon having bad past relationship experiences; facing assumptions that he’s having sex if he’s in a relationship; having moments of insecurities about his sexuality; etc.

Please note that writing negative ace experiences needs to be handled sensitively; fics of this type should definitely be tagged appropriately. For brief references, consider including author’s note warnings on the appropriate chapter (e.g. “asexual character assumed to be having sex”). Having an asexual sensitivity reader--particularly one of a type that corresponds with what you’re writing (i.e. sex-neutral, gray-ace, sex-repulsed, etc)--is very much encouraged.

Fics where asexuality is normalized

In contrast, there is just as much interest in stories that avoid all of these issues, and fully normalize asexuality. Contributors described how they enjoy stories where ace characters are allowed to just exist, without big important conversations or small othering details that depict asexual identities as less than fully accepted.

These can be included in any type of fic, but a few of the suggested details for how to normalize asexuality in a setting include:

A character being already out and accepted: For instance, Martin already knowing about Jon’s asexuality from early seasons.

Characters in the fic already knowing what asexuality is without needing it explained to them

Having more than one character be asexual: We aren’t confined to writing only canon characters as ace! This not only goes the extra mile in normalizing asexuality, but it gives the chance to include more of the ace spectrum.

If you’re aiming for asexuality to be normalized, please consider whether it makes sense for your asexual character to be anxious about coming out or discussing boundaries. There is a world of difference between someone responding to an ace character coming out with “I fully support you” and responding with “you’re an idiot for thinking we wouldn’t support you.” This is a common and easy pitfall to fall into, but the result is often less escapism and more a message of “your struggles aren’t real, and you’re stupid for thinking they are.”

Asexuality in Metaphor

Some contributors mentioned wanting to read settings where asexuality itself is normalized, but the issues facing aces could be explored on a metaphorical level. This falls somewhere in between the ideas of realistic or idealized settings as regards the ace experience, and could allow that exploration with a layer of distance. Ideas relating to this included fantasy settings with different kinds of magic.

PERSONALITY AND CHARACTERIZATION

The experience of being asexual isn’t something just limited to a relationship with sex: it can be shown in many ways, such as how a character relates to themselves, other people, media, and society. Like any other queer identity, it affects many aspects of our lives and informs a great deal about us as people. These little details don’t even need to be presented in a blunt “this is because this character is asexual” way--they can be little relatable notes for your ace readers, while not coming across in a “this is how all ace people are” way.

We’ve seen the question “how do I write a character as asexual, if I’m not planning on having someone ask them for sex or writing a coming-out scene?” many times. Our contributors were excited to share a wide variety of ideas for this from things they’ve read, written, or experienced:

Ace confusion

Not to be confused with the infantilizing “doesn’t know what sex is” approach, this could involve things like:

Being confused over what sexual attraction is: difficulty defining what they don’t experience.

Difficulty describing to others what lack of sexual attraction is: this is their default, and it can be difficult to contrast it to what they don’t experience.

Thinking that others describing sexual attraction or interest is just exaggeration

“Wait, that’s what you mean when you say ‘hot’? I just thought it meant they’re gorgeous.”

“You mean meeting someone and being instantly sexually interested in them is a real thing, and not just a movie trope?”

The Absurdity of How Society Views Sex

The jarring dissonance between asexual experiences and the norms in society and media can cause a lot of alienation and dysphoria in aces, but often it hits a point of feeling like a joke is being played on you. Contributors offered ideas for how this could be illustrated through a character:

Reading “How to Spice Up Your Love Life” articles out of pure morbid curiosity

Taking the most ridiculous Cosmo sex life article as How Everyone Thinks (and being concerned)

Having an allo friend or partner they can ask about whether any of it is legitimate advice (this one was brought up by a lot of people as a common ace experience)

An ADHD/autistic character getting a special interest or hyperfixation on societal views on sex or sexual practices, and pursuing it as purely a matter of research with no interest in participating

“Why do they keep bringing up ice cubes? Georgie, stop laughing, I am a researcher and a scholar.”

Needing to teleport out of the room if a sex scene comes up in a movie

Not minding the sex scenes, but needing to make fun of them or point out impracticalities

“On the beach? But sand is everywhere? Wait, they think getting sand everywhere is hot??”

Being baffled at what’s considered sexy: for example, Jon being baffled at “wet clothes are sexy,” having grown up by the beach and associating them with being terribly uncomfortable

Of course, asexual characters don’t need to be framed like they constantly need to learn about things from allo people--sometimes the reverse can be a fun twist. One reversal, for example, could be an ace person helping their allo friend parse whether their attraction to someone is simply sexual or also romantic.

Aces vs. flirting

While not specifically connected to sexual attraction, how a character interacts with flirting can very much demonstrate the asexual experience. Contributors discussed a variety of their own experiences, and details they’ve enjoyed reading for ace characters:

Having difficulty distinguishing between different kinds of draws to people--is it romance? Friendship?

Having difficulty picking up on whether or not someone is interested in them

Failing to realize they’re flirting or being flirted with

Enjoying flirting as just a fun thing to do without any particular goal (a popular suggestion for a Tim ace headcanon)

Casually flirting but then backing off if it becomes “real”

Several examples were given of scenarios these could be used for Jon:

Jon’s dry prickliness stemming from wanting to avoid people thinking he’s flirting or showing interest in them, not being sure where others judge the line between “flirting” or “being nice.”

Jon deciding he is going to make an effort to be more friendly to people, and awkwardly starts showering others with compliments; some of them interpret it as flirting and it’s very confusing.

Jon (or Martin) being overly dramatic or romantic when purposefully showing interest in someone, drawing from a basis of books or media rather than social experience.

Aces vs. hotness

We might use the word “hot” excessively, but ace people often have their own understanding of the word (and are often surprised to learn what others mean by it). Contributors brought up the following ideas for this area:

Using “hot” as an expression of “gorgeous to look at,” and being confused to learn that others use it as a sexual expression.

Engaging with “are they hot” conversations based purely on aesthetics, or other impressions like “would they give good hugs.”

Focusing on seemingly random physical details, like wrists or eyebrow shape, over more commonly sexualized ones.

Being confused over the criteria others use for hotness. Example: Jon’s reaction to “the hot one” comment.

Finding fictional characters not represented by a real person “hot” (e.g. from books, podcasts, video games with bad graphics, etc)

Using the words “hot” and sexy” for completely nonsexual things. Several contributors described being told they couldn’t be ace if they called anything hot/sexy, and then doing it more out of spite.

Being completely unfazed by innuendo or sex/nudity: For example, Jon’s calm response vs. Martin being flustered at Tim stripping

This is also an area where a story can establish the nature of their relationship with those around them: if a character is comfortably out as not being interested in sex, for instance, you can show that others around them support that by making their conversations more inclusive. For example, a “fuck, marry, kill” game with modified categories, or a “who would you have sex with” conversation changed to a “who would you have dinner with” one once the ace character enters.

Aces vs. sexual humor

Ace people’s reactions to sexual humor can vary as much as the reactions to flirting. Contributors described enjoying a broad range of these:

Aces who love sexual humor (not limited to sex-favorable aces)

Humor taking an angle of “sex is so strange, glad it isn’t real.”

Aces who are bored with or exhausted by sexual humor

Not finding sexual humor funny unless it’s also clever. “Yes I know that’s a sexual reference...wait, it was meant to be funny? Because it’s connected to sex? ....I see. Anyway.”

Bonus points if the “is that supposed to be funny because it’s sexual?” ace and the filthy humor ace are friends

It can even vary for the same person from setting to setting: someone may find making dirty jokes with a group of ace friends might be fun (see the “Absurdity of Sex” section above), but be very uncomfortable with someone else trying to twist something they said into something sexual. There’s also the nature of the joke itself: a silly pun may be fine, but a joke implying the ace person is interested in sex or said something sexual without meaning to may be alienating.

For TMA, the general interpretation of Jon is that he’d be uncomfortable with sexual humor, which is relatable to a lot of asexual people, but contributors brought up other possibilities as well: for example, the idea of Jon liking clever wordplay so much that if it just so happens to include something sexual, it doesn’t feel odd to him--why do the others look so shocked?

Note: A lot of asexual awareness posts insensitively treat the concept of aces who love filthy humor as more mature, more easygoing, less stereotypical, or otherwise superior to aces who are uncomfortable with sexual humor. This is a very harmful attitude that looks down on a lot of asexual people, and adds a pressure to push past comfort levels to fit in and “avoid being a stereotype.” Contributors loved reading stories that include flirty or filthy aces, but not when they take this tone. A favorite suggestion was to include more than one ace character to depict a variety, while treating them as equally valid.

Somewhat related to this is ace people’s relationship to sexual euphemisms. Contributors described their experiences or how they might write an ace character responding to these:

Being exhausted by how so many terms are considered euphemisms, or how any comment could be reframed as sexual.

Having a special annoyance when they accidentally stumble into or misunderstand a euphemism

Wanting to decouple euphemisms from their literal meaning: why does “spending the night” or “going home with someone” have to mean “having sex”?

In the same line, being very blunt and straightforward about making sexual references, because why dance around it?

Characterization Considerations

One discussion that is particularly relevant to The Magnus Archives is the idea of the “uptight nerd” ace persona. It may sound strange to say, but there is some legitimacy in this characterization, but for different reasons than is stereotyped. Many of us build up this persona while growing up--particularly in adolescence and early adulthood--to fend off uncomfortable social pressure, self-examination, or external criticism for why we relate to sex differently than our peers. This often involves playing up certain defenses for discomfort for sex or dating: “I don’t have time for any of that, I only have time for books and knowledge!” Or, the adult version: “I don’t have time for relationships, I’m married to my job!”

Where this departs from the stereotype is that these are generally coping mechanisms or facades rather than the truth. Asexuality isn’t “of course they don’t have time for sex, they’re obsessed with this or that”--but an asexual person who doesn’t feel comfortable in their environment, such as around work, school, or family, may deflect judgment with similar excuses. Similar to this, some find it tempting to be antisocial or hostile on purpose to fend off interest in them or avoid sexual expectations.

This is, of course, far from the only way an ace character could be written. For instance, if you wanted to write a setting where asexuality is more accepted, you could write Jon’s antisocial and closed-off tendencies as a result of being bullied from a very young age, while he is confident and secure in his asexuality. Or for other characters: you could write Tim as someone who has enjoyed sexual relationships, but just thought everyone was exaggerating on the attraction side of things.

Intersection of Asexuality with Other Identities

Another characterization consideration is how asexuality intersects with other identities and experiences included in the fic. Below are a few examples of many:

Asexuality and masculinity: Social expectations of masculinity place a high emphasis on sexuality, particularly heterosexuality, treating sexual activity as a commodity or prize. One possible reading of The Magnus Archives is Jon’s tendency to have closer and more numerous friendships with women connects to this.

Asexuality and trans identities: There is a significant overlap between aspec and trans identities, particularly nonbinary identities. Based on an October 2020 study by the Trevor Project (see link in reblog), ace respondents were roughly 50% more likely to be trans (including nonbinary) than allo respondents. Contributors described how they’ve felt things like “is this dysphoria I’m feeling a gender thing or an asexuality thing,” or how figuring out their asexuality helped them explore their gender.

Asexuality and race: In combination with LGBTQ+ spaces often being white-dominated, people of color often face stereotypes that hypersexualize or desexualize them. This can have a strong impact on people of color’s experience and self-perception as asexual. For instance, if you are writing Jon as Indian, you could consider how this may have impacted his experiences in LGBTQ spaces in university. As there is no ‘one size fits all’ experience for aces of color, we strongly recommend researching for the particular background you have in mind. We will be adding resource links to our main page shortly, but in the meantime check out the links in the reblog of this post!

INTIMACY AND RELATIONSHIPS

One of the topics addressed in our discussion was how a character’s asexuality may impact their experiences with intimacy and romantic relationships. Contributors discussed ways to portray this in fic, whether or not it includes sex or even mentions it.

Physical Intimacy

Intimacy, sensuality, and sex are separate things that may or may not overlap depending on the individual. Contributors discussed how, for people across the ace spectrum, the relationship between these three tends to differ from common societal frameworks or depictions of intimacy in fiction.

Enjoying physical intimacy without the expectation that it will become sexual: massages, falling asleep on top of each other, bathing together, etc.

This includes acts that would often be expected to “lead somewhere” but don’t, such as lots of touching or nude cuddling.

Craving closeness/touch completely outside of sexual drive

One scenario suggested for this topic is an asexual character discovering that without the worry that an act of intimacy will ‘lead somewhere,’ they enjoy something they used to get anxious about, such as sharing a bed or showering together.

Boundaries & Communication

Stories with an asexual character in a relationship often address physical boundaries within that relationship. The below are some of the scenarios contributors have enjoyed:

People communicating over their sexual boundaries, rather than assuming what these are as soon as they hear the word “asexual.”

The boundaries discussion being framed as something that any couple in a fictional relationship should have, not just because one is asexual.

In relationships between allo and ace characters, the allo character having boundaries of their own, rather than just the ace character.

Normalizing boundaries discussions for allo couples as well.

Note: If a boundaries discussion involves a sex-favorable ace character, take caution at the risk of having them sound offended or derisive that the discussion is happening (e.g. “What, I’m not a child” or “Not all aces are like that.”). Enforcing the idea that people should assume their partner is sex-interested is extremely harmful to sex-disinterested aces.

Some contributors noted that they prefer fics where the boundaries discussion is something that has taken place in the past, rather than run through at the beginning of each fic they read. In these cases, this past discussion could be illustrated in the interaction itself: a character’s awareness of what lines not to cross, the other’s confidence and trust that those boundaries will be respected, and so on.

Issues of Intimacy Outside of Sex

While aversion to sex is the most well-known dimension of asexuality, there are other aversions and boundaries that could apply to either ace or allo characters:

Ace characters that are kiss-averse and/or touch-averse: This also works against the “They won’t have sex, but they’ll make up for that with kissing even more!” trope that implies asexual people have to compensate for a nonsexual relationship.

Allo characters with their own aversions or specific boundaries: suggestions included how this can apply to trans characters.

Fluctuations in levels of aversion (note: it is important to not treat increased aversion as “progress” or decreased aversion as “regression”)

In cases of fluctuating aversion, characters developing ways to communicate these levels, and responding appropriately. For example, “Kissing is not on the table right now, let’s move on to something more comfortable.”

Contributors were excited to discuss how this area could particularly be used for the allo partner of an ace character, such as an allo Martin having difficulties with touch post-Lonely, or discovering that he doesn’t enjoy kissing.

Relationships to Sex (or Lack Thereof)

Asexuality ‘subtypes’ are terms many aces describe their personal relationship with sex and/or sexual content. These are simplified self-descriptors rather than rigid categories or mini-sexualities, and the terms rarely encompass the full detail of that relationship. Please note that the below discussion assumes a general familiarity with ace subtypes.

Needless to say, aces across the spectrum and of every subtype want to see their identities represented in fic. The discussion focused on ways to illustrate those experiences, and details contributors would enjoy seeing:

Non-averse aces trying sex and deciding they have no interest in it: pushing back against the “if you’re not repulsed you’ll like and want sex” idea.

No expectation that “sex-favorable” means always interested in sex.

The pressure an ace person may face to oversimplify their relationship to sex or sexual content out of fear they’ll appear inconsistent or exaggerating: “If I’m okay with this now, what if I’m not later? Will I seem picky if I’m only comfortable with something in an extremely specific scenario?”

“Sex repulsion” and “sex aversion” generally are used to describe asexual people who don’t want sex, but are simplified terms for what can be immensely varied experiences. Someone could be repulsed by physical involvement in sex, repulsed by personally engaging in anything sexual, repulsed by sexual content, repulsed by just the idea of sex--or any variation or combination of these. There are even repulsions that could be part of more sex-interested subtypes: an ace who enjoys sex but is repulsed by nudity, or an ace who enjoys sexual activities with a partner but not being touched during them, etc.

Contributors discussed how much they enjoy reading simple “I just don’t want sex” approaches to aversion/repulsion, but also look forward to reading explorations such as:

Enjoying one specific type of engagement with sexual content or activity, but having an aversion to others.

Regularly varying levels of repulsion: Days of “please don’t remind me sex exists” to days of mild curiosity, for instance.

Aces with a relationship to sex that doesn’t involve another person, including if they’re in a relationship.

Fluidity between ace subtypes can fluctuate between sex-interested and sex-disinterested in both directions: it can be both “I said I wasn’t interested in this before, but let’s carefully revisit” and “I know we’ve been doing this, but I’m no longer comfortable with it.” Contributors mentioned never having seen fic with the latter, and expressed an interest in reading stories exploring this.

On this note, it is common for stories of fluidity between subtypes to be only moving in a more sex-interested direction. Many asexual people, particularly sex-averse aces, face immense pressure to ‘learn how to like sex,’ or have their sexuality erased by saying they’re a ‘late bloomer’ who will learn to like it later. Depicting this direction should be done with great care and nuance, and we strongly recommend getting feedback from a sex-disinterested sensitivity reader for stories of this type. It’s possible that an ace reader who isn’t sex-disinterested would miss or not be affected by something that is quite painful to sex-disinterested aces.

CONCLUSION

If you’ve stuck with us for this long, well done! We understand that such a long resource can be a bit overwhelming, but we hope it can show you the depth of variety and enthusiasm ace readers have for more ace content and inspire you further. One thing we all had in common during our discussion was how excited we were to have a canonically asexual protagonist, and how thrilled we were to see content that explored his asexuality. In putting together this resource, we hope that you are encouraged to write about characters whose asexuality impacts their experiences and the story in unique, thoughtful, and creative ways. We can’t wait to see what you come up with!

#asexuality #asexuality in writing #ace week #the magnus archives #tma #writing resources #asexual characters #roundtables

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dialovers-translations · 3 years

Text

DIABOLIK LOVERS DAYLIGHT Vol.5 Sakamaki Kanato [TRACK 1]

Original title: ワガママ

Source: Diabolik Lovers Daylight Vol. 5 Sakamaki Kanato

Audio: Here (Huge thank you to @filthyhelplessworld for providing the audio!)

Seiyuu: Kaji Yuki

Translator’s note: The title of this track really describes the whole thing perfectly, haha. I have an insane amount of respect for all Kanato stans out there who keep up with this little brat’s selfish behavior because it couldn’t be me. However, I am excited for this CD before of the first 2-3 minutes of the track. I can already tell things are going to get intense.

Track 1 ll Track 2 ll Track 3 ll Track 4 ll Track 5 + Epilogue

→ LIKE MY TRANSLATIONS? SUPPORT ME ON KO-FI!

Track 1: Selfish

The scene starts outside in the garden.

*Pshhhhhh*

*Thud*

[00:17] “Here you go. I purchased this tea because I figured it would strike your fancy. Since I decided to hold a tea party, I want to thoroughly enjoy it. Take a whiff. Does it not smell wonderful? Darjeeling is very subtle in taste, yet extremely fragrant. It fits you perfectly.”

You fail to respond.

[00:46] “Say, why would you ignore me? I prepared nothing but your favorites today, yet you won’t even say a single thank you...That’s a little strange, don’t you think? Why…? How…? I might as well just enjoy the tea party by myself then.”

You remain quiet.

[01:21] “I suppose you really won’t give me a response. ...You’re acting a little off today. Or is that just my imagination? Ahー Could it be because of that moon? The moon makes us Vampires feel restless inside. Perhaps it has the same effect on humans? Fufu...Fufufufu...Ahahaha!

*Cling*

[02:23] “Come on, you should try your tea before it gets cold. It is much more delicious when enjoyed hot after all. Take a proper look at these flowers I arranged for you!”

*Rustle rustle*

*Shatter*

“Haah...I prepared all of this for you...So be delighted...and smile…Hey? Say something! Look at me! I’m begging you…!!”

You fail to respond once more.

[03:07] “Hey...I’m talking to you…! Sniffle...Uu...WHY WON’T YOU SAY ANYTHING!?”

*SHATTER*

“Ah...Uu...Hic...Aaah...Uu...Why…!? Why!? Why!? Why!? Kuh...Why did you die…? Hey? ANSWER ME!!”

*FLASHBACK STARTS*

*Rustle*

[04:06] “Haah...Scoot a little closer. How am I supposed to suck your blood like this? Did you not hear me when I said I’m feeling unwell? Even having to sit upright in bed is rough. Are you not aware of why people come to the infirmary in the first place? You’re supposed to nurse me back to health, so be a little more considerate at least! ーー Come on, hurry!”

You walk over to the bed.

[04:47] “Took you long enough, gosh…”

You frown.

“...Hm? You’re asking if I’m upset? Hah. And what exactly makes you think that?”

You shrug.

“Hmー You choose to feign ignorance, huh?”

He looks away.

[05:11] “It’s nothing. ...More importantly, hurry up, will you? It’s difficult to drink your blood when you’re standing there, spaced out. Come closer. Don’t make me have to spell it out for you.”

You hesitate.

“...Why are you acting like that? Do you want to upset me?”

You shake your head.

“If you do not, then fix that attitude of yours.”

You finally step closer.

[05:50] “Exactly. You should have just kept quiet and obeyed me from the very beginning. ...Come on, now kneel down. I’ll suck your blood.”

*Rustle*

“Keep still? Ah…”

Kanato bites you.

*Sluuuurp*

[06:22] “Mmh…It’ll hurt if you move, remember?”

*Sluuuurp*

“Nn...Hah...Didn’t I just tell you to keep still!? Aah...Or do you want it to hurt, perhaps? Hahn…”

*Sluuuurp*

“Fufufu...~ So you actually do. You’re that kind of girl after all.”

You deny his words.

[07:01] “You don’t even know that about yourself? Well, I suppose it’s fine. I’ll be so kind as to tell you. Someone did say that humans are the most ignorant when it comes to themselves after all. I assume that goes for you as well? You see, you just love pain and suffering. Give that some serious thought (1). ...That’s why you did something which would upset me...It was on purpose, obviously!”

You shake your head.

[07:52] “Oh please, don’t play dumb now! I saw it with my own eyes! You were having a rather friendly chat with him ーー with Reiji at the manor, weren’t you? Hahn…”

*Sluuuurp*

“Ugh…! ...Fufu...What a forced cry! You can drop the act now. I already know you aren’t opposed to the pain, since it actually makes you feel good, doesn’t it? Did you have some fun with Reiji in a similar fashion as well? Hahn…”

*Sluuuurp*

[08:36] “...Did you think I would believe you if you denied it with tears in your eyes like that? Think again! (2) ...Mmh…”

*Sluuuurp*

You start to feel faint.

“Fufu...Are you pretending to suddenly feel faint as part of your act as well? Seems like you have become a natural at this.”

You explain.

[08:57] “You’re feeling unwell? Haha…That’s a new one.”

You ask him to stop.

“The answer is no. I’m not satisfied yet. After all, I’ve barely had any.”

You repeat that you’re feeling unwell.

[09:19] “You still insist on acting as if you’re in pain? ...CUT IT OUT ALREADY! I mean, it doesn’t make sense for this to suddenly happen, does it!? I’ve always been able to suck this much blood without any issues!

...Aah. I see. I get it now. You’re running low on blood because you let him feed off you, correct? That’s why you’re coming up with the random excuse of feeling unwell, am I right? That’s the only logical explanation! ...How dare you!”

Kanato continues to suck your blood as you protest.

[10:05] “If you’re so sure that I’m just misunderstanding things...Then why don’t you tell me straight up what you were talking about with Reiji yesterday!?”

You flinch.

“...Cat got your tongue?”

You tell him.

“You were discussing your health? ...Fufu...That’s a lie. After all, the two of you seemed rather close. Standing there together, whispering to each other.”

You look away.

“See? You’ve gone quiet again. Do you have nothing to say!?”

You apologize.

[10:50] “Kuh...Giving me a meek apology will only add to my anger, you know? ...Well, I’m broad-minded so I don’t mind letting it slide this once. However, do not dare to even get close to him again in the future. Can you promise me that?”

You nod.

*Rustle*

“...Hah!”

He pushes you away.

*Thud*

[11:25] “Oh please, you’re overreacting. I only pushed you lightly, yet you act as if you’re about to fall over. ...There’s really no need to still keep this act up though. Good grief…”

*Rustle*

“What are you spacing out for? Come on, wrap your arms around me.”

*Rustle rustle*

[11:50] “...Took you long enough to embrace me, geez. ...Stroke my head, please. I’m exhausted after sucking your blood, so it only makes sense you reward me now, right?”

*Rustle rustle*

“Exactly, just like that...More…You belong to me. All of you. From head to toe. Down to the very last drop of blood. ...Do you understand?”

You nod.

[12:33] “All you need to do is be with me. ...Forever.”

*Rustle*

“...Say? You don’t think we’re done, do you? We still haven’t discussed how you will apologize to me, have we?”

You tilt your head to the side.

[12:58] “That should be a given. You had the nerve to upset me after all. Right. I suppose I’ll have you prepare me a sweet feast. Homemade, of course. A cake doused in plenty of whipped cream, cookies, and chocolate...Oh, pudding as well!”

You agree, promising him you’ll try your best.

“Fufu~ I don’t know how they’ll turn out, however, you better make them delicious. That’s all. ...Understood?”

You nod.

“Fufufu...I’m looking forward to it~”

ーー TO BE CONTINUED ーー

Translation notes

(1) 胸に手を当てる or ‘mune ni te o ateru’ literally means ‘to put one’s hand on one’s chest/heart’ and is used when telling someone to think very deeply about something. (As if to look inside their own heart)

(2) 甘い or ‘amai’ doesn’t always mean ‘sweet’, but mean ‘weak’ or ‘naive’ as well.

#diabolik lovers #dialovers #kanato sakamaki #diabolik lover daylight #diabolik lovers translation #diabolik lovers drama cd #drama cd

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superhero--imagines · 3 years

Text

Part 12

Part 1 Here! / Part 2 Here! / Part 3 Here! / Part 4 Here! / Part 5 Here! / Part 6 Here! / Part 7 Here! / Part 8 Here! / Part 9 Here! / Part 10 Here! / Part 11 Here!

* You stare at the blank ceiling, the smooth unblemished surface like freshly fallen snow

* you should really put some nudie posters up there or something to lighten the mood a little.

* Light notes from the piano float around your room

* You sigh, so these are the facts as you know them:

* Edward is your best friend who has occasional bouts of brooding and flirtatious behavior.

* Bella is not albino, she has a lovely peach undertone, and a lovely grilled peach scent

* The entire coven has treated your attraction to this young lady’s blood like you got caught masturbating or wetting the bed or something

* “You don’t need to be embarrassed it’s a perfectly natural feeling.” Esme tells you while rubbing your shoulders

* “We’ve all been there” Rosalie reassures

* “Totally not a big deal, it happens to me everyday!” Jasper chimes in

* You wish sunlight hurt you so you could combust into flames on the spot

* The piano notes get louder, and you feel your mouth pinch into a frown.

* “Oh my god Edward! Read the room, I want brooding music!”

* Edward stops, up until then he had been playing a pretty cheerful Mozart piece

* You can tell he wants to ask why, you’ve been radiating joy non-stop since biology. But he decides against it

* “You really shouldn’t eat lying down.” He says as you sip blood while lying flat on your bed.

* “Okay dad.” You snort

* Edward starts to imagine what it would be like if you called him ‘daddy’

* All needy on top of him, your hands curled in fists against his chest, the breathy “daddy please” that leaves your mouth

* All of a sudden he’s ugly turned on

* “Ugh you’re no fun, I’m going to hang out with Rosalie”

* You leave the room and Edward has a total meltdown, is this what a kink is? Is he discovering a kink?!? At 100 years of age?!?!?!?

* Edward.exe is broken

* You don’t even make it to Rosalie’s room, you can smell them a mile away

* Broccoli, sugar and fat, and axe body spray. No peaches you realize with a sigh.

* They’ve only just barely rung the door bell when you open the door

* “Hey what are you guys doing here?”

* Jessica’s standing in front, looking pretty at ease, while Mike and Angela look equally uncomfortable.

* Makes sense, Jessica’s here all the time now either for homework or to watch TV.

* Mike and Angela haven’t been back since your sweet sixteen

* “How did you get down here so fast?”

* “I saw your car from upstairs” you say with a sheepish smile.

* You wish Alice would have given you a heads up, you weren’t planning on pretending to be human right now. Still you probably look raggedy enough right now in sweatpants and an oversized sweatshirt

* You can probably pull this sick thing off

* “We just wanted to check up on you, I heard from Mike and Angela you got sick during class.” And then in a more annoyed tone Jessica adds “And I guess you’re too sick to respond to all my texts and calls”

* Oh crap, where is your phone.

* You pat your pockets, and think when you saw it last

* “I left it in my locker” you smack your head. You told Edward to go grab your bag from class but you forgot your phone.

* “Hey don’t worry about it, I can get it for you tomorrow if you want.” Jessica rushes to your side and pats your arm. You shake your head

* “No I can get it myself, I’m fine I just ate something bad.” You mumble.

* You’re not missing school tomorrow. You would literally risk murder to smell Bella again.

* It’s not insatiable thirst like described in the books, more like a craving, like someone might have for nachos.

* It itches at you for a while, but if you just distract yourself long enough you can move on

* “Would you like to come in? I think Esme just baked cookies or scones or something.”

* Esme likes to bake for the smell and donate the food to the local shelter. That, or take it for her employees at her architectural firm in town.

* Firm is a loose word, she has maybe four employees, and they get one job a month, but it seems to make her happy.

* Angela and Mike give each other looks but Jessica perks up

* “Is she making those delicious earl grey scones again?” You sniff the air

* “I think she made some of that orange zest butter too”

* “Omg I am so happy you left your phone at school” Jessica giggles walking inside past you, you hear her greet Esme with a squeal

* “They really are good.” You tell them and your remaining human friends enter the house carefully

* “Soooo where is everyone?” Mike asks taking a look around your living room.

* “Ummm Rosalie’s in the garage, Alice is probably meditating on the roof, Emmett’s at swim practice, and Jasper’s probably at the barn.”

* “What about Edward?” Angela asks before Mike can ask about the barn

* Last you saw him he was playing the piano in your room, but it’s been a while since then

* “He’s probably in his room monologuing about the degradation of the American dream or something.”

* You lead them into the kitchen where Esme and Jessica are already deep in conversation about the wonder of her baking

* “-side is so light and fluffy, how do you get the tea flavor though”

* “Witchcraft.” Esme jokes, giving a full smile before putting another tray in the oven. Only Jessica laughs, the other two are too nervous to even sit down

* “Why don’t I teach you how when you come over next week.”

* Yeah you’re pretty sure Jessica is really only a fan of the “eating” and not of the “baking”

* You’re half surprised when she seems happy at the invitation.

* “Oh that sounds great, I can’t wait for it!” Jessica’s practically beaming

* Where’s Edward when you need him? You wonder what her motivations are.

* Jasper is not going to like this. He’s already irritated enough that he’s kicked out of his own house every Friday when Jessica comes over to watch arrested development

* Before you can say anything to Esme the conversation moves forward

* “Did you guys hear about that security guard that died in Mason county?”

* She’s just making small talk, you know that. But you and Esme instantly tense at the mention

* Carlisle had mentioned he thought there was a nomad wandering through, they were still far enough not to cause the coven immediate trouble, but anything that brought more attention to them was a disadvantage

* “My Dad says he heard from Chief Swan it was probably a wild animal attack” Mike mumbles over a bite of scone, you figured he would be the easiest to win over with food

* You hide a smile behind your hand, he really is like a golden retriever

* “What kind of a wild animal climbs stairs into a building” Jessica mumbles over another bite of scone. And maybe to fit in, or maybe because she’s always been a nervous eater, Angela takes a bite too.

* “Oh wow, these are really good” she murmurs

* Esme Cullen ladies and gentleman, winning the hearts of teenagers with baked goods since 19XX

* “Well you kids stay safe, stay together if you can.” She pats your head and you nod.

* You don’t know the details of the attack, you get the feeling Carlisle still see’s you as a kid and he doesn’t want to burden you.

* But assuming the small changes that have happened have nothing to do with the large changes, that means Laurent, James and Victoria will be passing through soon.

* Maybe it’s for the best Bella doesn’t get involved with Edward until later.

* You’d really like to not get all mixed up in the whole “James Thing” if you can help it.

* “Are you staying for dinner? I’m thinking of whipping up some pasta, maybe a chicken?” Esme looks to you, yeah you have no idea how she’s going to manage that. Besides the baking basics there’s no actually food in this kitchen. And the one upstairs is just for your blood bags.

* “(Y/N), do you think...Carlisle would mind if we used one of... his chickens?”

* His chickens? The only chickens in the house-

* “No Esme! My chickens are only for love and chicken snuggles” and their blood which tastes very leans yet rich. “Not to eat!”

* “It would just be one-we’ll eat your least favorite!”

* You’re really hoping this is her way of chasing the humans out because she doesn’t want to cook.

* “No- oh my god- we’re going to the diner come on!” You say tugging Jessica and Angela to stand.

* “It was great seeing you again Mrs. Cullen, see you next week!” Jessica shouts as the three of them follow you out.

* “Going out? Is that such a good idea it’s late and a school night.” Edward says as he descends down the stairs

* “Oh my god, yes Dad I’ll be home before my curfew.” You say before leaving, cue Edward crumbling onto the stairs as he imagines you calling him “daddy” again

* “I’m going to hell, I’m definitely going to hell.” He mumbles, his face in his hand.

* It’s a really short drive to the diner, also known as the only place to eat in Forks in the mid 2000’s.

*There’s not even a McDonald’s. It’s almost sad

* And when you get there, while everyone moves ahead to the table you see a familiar face.

* “Oh, Hey Bella”

* Your eyes met and you figured it would be rude not to say anything. It looks like she’s here having dinner with her Dad.

*She really does look like her dad, same eyes, same cheekbones.

* “Nice to see you again Chief Swan”

* “Nice to see you too, how’s Carlisle doing? Heard it’s been busy at the hospital.”

* “Yeah, it’s like he doesn’t sleep anymore.” You grin at your own joke.

* “Are you feeling alright now?” Bella asks, she looks genuinely concerned

* “Yeah, I um, made some questionable food choices at lunch.”

* There’s an awkward moment of silence. You get the impression that Chief Swan and his daughter are both the “strong silent” types.

* It looks like they’ve both finished eating already

* If you had known she was going to be here you would have made Edward come with you.

* “Oh hey, do you want to join us for dinner?” It just seems like the friendly thing to do for the new girl, something on-brand with human character

* Definitely not because if you get on her good side now, maybe she won’t kick you out once her and Edward get married.

*Father and daughter exchange a glance and the familiar connection they have makes you nervous.

*“Of course you don’t have to, I know you’re here with your dad so-“

* “I’m sure Bella would love to join-“ Charlie says at the same time Bella says:

* “Wouldn’t it be kind of weird since I already ate.”

* Ah, so they’re not as in sync as you thought.

* You give your best “Golden Girl - You can totally trust me with your daughter” smile.

* “I’m actually not eating either,” you place a hand over your stomach like a human might. “The uh, Clam Linguine is still haunting me, so I’m sticking to broth and sprite.”

* Why did you say Clam? You don’t even eat meat, it’s how you’ve been getting away with eating so little at lunch.

* “not a lot of vegetarian choices” You say to your human friends who nod solemnly.

* Father and Daughter exchange another look likening telepathic communication and they both move to stand

* “I’m going to finish up some paperwork at the precinct, don’t stay out to late.” Charlie says, leaning down to kiss his daughter on the forehead

* You watch with warm eyes and a small smile twitching onto your lips

* Bella is so loved.

* You can’t believe she’s willing to break her dad’s heart just so she can be 19 forever.

* Which, as you are 19 forever, you can fairly say is overrated

* “Hey guys Bella’s joining us.”

* Your female friends offer her a polite smile, you see Angela gaze flick from the menu to Bella’s face. Silently calculating the worth of this opportunity

* Any intel on this new girl would be pretty valuable

* Same old Angela

* Mike sits up straight so fast that he actually knocks his silverware off the table.

* “H-hey Bella, Hi, w-what, what are you doing here?”

* “Eating.” Bella says it so bluntly that you can’t help but laugh.

* Mike flushes bright red and Jessica and Angela exchange a look before giggling.

* “I thought it would be cool if she came over since I didn’t get to talk to her much.” You take a seat next to Jessica and Bella follows by taking the last seat between you and Mike.

* You still catch whiffs of her scent her and there, especially when she’s sitting so close to you.

* But it’s not so bad, the peachy smell is making you a little lightheaded, but you can handle it.

* At least you’re not fantascizing about killing her and everyone in this room like a certain dork you know.

* “Do you guys want to do that promotion where we get the basket of fries for the table?” Jessica asks

* “I don’t like sharing fries with Mike he eats them all.” Angela mumbles

* Yeah you remember last time when after a football game the three of them actually sat down and divided the plate in three equal portions

* They even measured out each fry dividing up the extra long ones

* “Says the person who basically eats ketchup with a spoon.” Mike retorts and Angela scoffs

* “It’s America’s best condiment for a reason Mike.” Angela snaps back

* “I think we’re getting off track, I say Mike buys us all french fries to make up for all the times he hogged the joint basket” Jessica’s teasing but Mike takes it seriously

* “What so I’m a French fry monster now?”

* “Yes” Both Angela and Jessica respond in unison without looking up from their menu cards

* “What do you think Bella?” You’re surprised that Jessica’s the one asking. You get the feeling she’s not very happy about Mike’s crush on Bella.

* “I think Mike should buy everyone their own basket since he has such a bad history with sharing.”

* “You traitor!” Mike mocks hurt and you all laugh.

* You look at Bella through the corner of your eye, maybe it’s just the lighting but she looks pinker when she’s laughing.

* She looks happy as she starts contributing to the conversation.

* “I will say the pie here is really good, I wouldn’t share even if someone paid me to.”

* “Omg yes, the cheery icebox pie is out of this world” Jessica responds

* “I’m partial to chess pie” Mike pipes in and Angela laughs

* “You guys are crazy, the fruit custard they make is the best”

* You grin as your four new friends argue about the superior dessert, watching Bella laugh beside you.

* Welcome to team human Bella

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#twilight #twilight saga #twilight imagine #twilight headcanon #twilight reader insert #edward cullen imagine #edward cullen x reader #edward cullen #edward and bella #bella swan x reader #Bella x reader #bella swan #Jessica Stanley x reader #mike newton #angela weber #midnight sun #superhero--imagines

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