#we forgot to eat until fucking 4:30 pm
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This convention has been absolutely bonkers in bad ways but also in a LOT of good ones, very excited for tonight though and that I took off work tomorrow because I am completely beat and I need rest. Six days until my tattoo!
#prince text#my face 2024#I did not take a pic of my super fairy kei outfit yesterday#we were so busy booking it though dealer’s hall#we forgot to eat until fucking 4:30 pm#so by that time it was time for some Actual Dinner.#anyways I bought way too much but I also saved specifically to go apeshit here#bc I never prepared appropriately for cons in the past#but I wanted to go in ready to spend here and it was so so wor th it#so many unique and adorable stuffed animals#pins dragons and constellations#there were more people doing plus sizes this time!!!!!!#I was so happy I got a beautiful mad burnish promare crewneck that is#like ACTUALLY oversized on me#and a beautiful pastel dragon cardigan#goddd the dragons were out in FULL FORCE THIS YEAR#anyways yea idk#it was fun and im really glad despite all the bullshit that happened too#still here today#but will be going home in a few hours#ready for my bed#excited to introduce my stuffed animals to one another#it’s important ok :(#anyways I had a cute fit yesterday but got no pics#and I was supposed to wear another cute fit today#but after all that was yesterday and the anime rave LMAOOO#im pretty burnt today#so not as cute fashion pics as anticipated
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Friday, 01/20/2023
Last Night's dream: I dreamt that there was a family of bears living in our backyard. And that Frank Ocean released a visual album - I think it was a new one - and we were watching it on the TV in the kitchen.
Where I went: res, school - stu's class for digital!, took the GO train home
What I ate: 3 bananas, oatmeal, cookies, a cracker, dumplings with soy sauce for brunch. For dinner, I had home food, which was egg + chives, chicken + da cai, coriander chutney, and a tuna sandwich that Chai Li brought home. For dessert, I had tiramisu, cookies, and tea!
What I did: So I woke up at 10:55 am. and I was like FUCK I'm late AGAIN. And I rushed to get ready for school and was out the door in pretty good time. I texted Sarah and we met up to walk to class together. She had asked me if I remembered where the class was, and I thought to meet her outside the pink wall, but because she texted 2 mins ago, I figured she'd be farther down the way so I kept walking (after I stopped!). And then I was like "where r u" and she was like "behind u" and I was like 0.0 lol. And so we walked to class together. Our computers weren't working so Stu had to help us, and Graham also came to help. Sarah's been working on her table merch for the zine club table! (I forgot what it's called.) I'm glad Carrie is joining her and Erica! Because maybe we can invite Erica to some dinners! I also let Sarah know about the depth cues zine submission coming up. I let Carrie know the day before. Sarah left class kinda early. It was hard to follow what was going on tbh. Stu brought the animation into photoshop and idk how he did it. I spent the majority of the class just looking at 3D assets and wondering how Stu did it. Instead of asking him, I just wasted time and left a little past 1:00 pm. Ugh. I need to get better at asking for help!! After, I went back to the dorm to have brunch. I had to eat all the bananas I got from Walmart because they would have otherwise rotted over the weekend. And when Carrie came back from class, we spent some time in the kitchen together, working and eating. She also did not do the rotoscoping thing, so she worked on that while I read and took notes. We also took a look at some of the forest finals people made in her class. I decided to catch the bus around 4:48, so I left Res at around 4:30 and caught the bus. Some people (including me) were running from the bus to try and catch the GO train at Oakville GO. I don't know if I even tapped correctly. I don't know if I hit the override button all the way. So I was sitting very anxiously on the train. I couldn't even read or listen to music. After I got to union station, I decided to do some reading, because I had to wait for like 45 mins until the next train. Then, I got on the train and kept reading there. I felt like such an intellectual. Oh ya, something I remembered from earlier today aka last night. I met Carrie in the kitchen at around 2-3:00 am and I was telling her how great the book was. And how a lot of the tips could apply to illustration. And she felt inspired hearing some of the tips and stories. And she also wants to make films! I am happy to hear. Anyways, Mom picked me up from the station, and we went to No-frills to buy drinks for tomorrow. I wore a thin jacket, which I kind of regret, but I have other jackets at home, so it should be okay. Then, we went to Woodside to pick up a cake for Alex. Woodside got pimped out. The dinosaurs move. And there was a DJ. And it was dark but there were colourful lights lol. We got the cake from Everbest bakery. 6 buns from there are $10 now :( they used to be 6 buns for $3. But for them, I understand the price increase because they're a small business. After we came back home, I took a shower, and then had dinner. Helped mom with washing some dishes, then made tea. And I worked on my rotoscoping assignment and watched EI and I'm about to go to sleep because I have work at 10:00 tomorrow.
Media: Emergency Intercom ep 79, Doja Cat, Miley Cyrus, TXT 0x1=Lovesong Japanese version
What I worked on: rotoscoping, reading
What I'm grateful for: Mom! She was literally up until 1:00 am cutting ingredients for tomorrow. She has work but still has to took dishes for CNY party. I'll try to help as much as I can, but I also have quite a bit of work to do.
Closing thoughts: I don't see the hype with ice spice. And I might eat my words later down the line, but at the moment I don't get it. That video of her peeing in a fan's mouth while she was performing is also quite disgusting and it was my first impression of her... I need to MAKE time for drawing.
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if you're taking asks for the prompts, can you do 11 and 17 from the angst list with george but have a fluffy ending? she/her pronouns pls
I Can Make It Right
SHSJS I HAVE SO MUCH ANGST IN MY INBOX YALL!
Thanks for the request babe! The way it came out was gender neutral i dont think I user she/her, but it still works trust me!
George x reader imagine (established)
11) "It's not important apparently"
17) "You already made me feel like shit so might as well finish me off"
⚠︎ angst with happy ending, unresolved issue but they're gonna fix it dont worry 😌, angry George, swearing
*** = flashback
Masterlist
You had stood infront of your bathroom mirror finishing up your makeup for the night. Your hair was already done and you had a nice outfit on, not to fancy and not too comfortable. While listening to a playlist George had made for you, you had put down the brushes you were using. It didnt really matter if you cleaned up your makeup that was littered all over the sink right now, but right now you were feeling good.
Today was your and George's 3rd year anniversary and you couldn't be happier about it. Today you two were going to dinner and doing something else which was supposed to be a surprise for you. It was a night on the town.
George and you met 4 years ago actually. You two started out as acquaintances, the slowly grew into friends and then one day he asked you to join him to dinner. At first you were oblivious to his actions, thinking he was just being a good friend, but turns out the more dates you two went on the more you caught on. He officially asked you to be his girlfriend 3 years ago today.
His friends keep on pressuring George to propose already, they think it's been long enough. The only thing close to marriage is a promise ring. He put the ring on your finger as a promise that one day he would marry you, everytime you doubt that he will propose you turn your attention to the cute ring on your finger.
You had turned off the bedroom lights and sat on your bed finally relaxing after struggling to find a decent enough outfit for tonight. George said that he was going to pick you up around 6:00 and now it is 5:47 so you had some time to spare.
You had found yourself scrolling through tiktok because you had nothing else better to do at this moment. It was a guilty pleasure of yours even though you and george both joked around about hating tiktok.
Time began to tick away so you had checked the clock on your phone which said 5:57 pm. You had grabbed shoes that you set up against your bed, slipped them on and grabbed all of your belongings for the night. You stationed yourself in the living room waiting till George came to the door.
Nervousness always came up before a date, it was the anticipation actually. You were excited and nervous about the date as you always were, but today for you was special. It was three years worth of beautiful love. You remembered the time he first said I love you too, it was just like it was yesterday.
***
"Hey y/n." George looked towards you. You both were sitting on a plaid, plush blanket with a brown woven basket ontop in between you two. It was just like the movies and that why you cringed because of how cheesy it was when George led you to it.
It was sweet, it was extremely sweet and you loved these dates that George always brung you too. You always felt special when you are sitting next to him.
You responded to George. "Yeah Gogy?" You laughed at the use of his nickname.
"Im trying to be serious right now and you call me Gogy." George smiled and shook his head. "Anyways, you know I love you, right?"
"Of course I do-"
"No I love you. I mean. I'm in love with you." George reached to rest his hand ontop of yours and repeated himself. "I'm in live with you y/n."
You wasted no time answering. "Im in love with you too."
***
6:03
George didnt show up yet, but there was no sweat. He was only 3 minutes late, maybe he ran into traffick. Your stomach was rumbling, but you didnt want to eat yet since you two we're planning to go to dinner. Patience is key, and it wasnt like he wasn't late before.
6:10
You started to get worried, it's been 10 minutes and still no sign of your boyfriend. You had gotton up several times to check outside of your door only to be met with no one. Your mind was jumping to conclusions about if he forgot your anniversary, but you shut those thoughts out for the time being.
6:19
Okay this is getting out of hand. You brung out our phone and began to text George, you couldn't believe that you had waited this long before texting the man.
Where are you? Ive been waiting for 29 minutes?!
[Sent: 6:20pm]
George what are you doing?
[Sent: 6:20pm]
You awaited his text message with your phone faced up on the coffee table infront of you. You didn't want to believe that George woukd forget, or overslept, but that was becoming truth the more minutes passed by with no call or text.
6:30
Calling him was useless, because he didn't answer. He didn't hang up on you he just wasn't picking up the phone, like he turned it off. You started to get worried if something happened to him, if he was in a situation where he couldn't call or text you. You wondered if he was safe at home and not out in the middle of the street.
In a flash all your worries subsided when your phone lit up with a notification.
ThisIsNotGeorgeNotFound is live:
Im Playing golf with my friends
That son of a bitch. Pissed off was an understatement, you were fuming. How could he end up streaming at home when you had constantly reminded him about this day, he knew damn well about this day too. How could he?
You ended up grabbing a jacket and your purse and ended up driving to George's place. It seemed like he was mocking you in a way, he knew you had notifications on for Twitch. You loved to support him and his career, but this was making a fool out of yourself.
Your hand tightly gripped the steering wheel as you tried not to run every red light you cane across. You finally came across George's home, you found a place to park and quickly got out of your car and sped walked your way to George's residence. Finally making up to George's door you knocked harshly on the door probably making more noise than what you intended too. You continuously banged on his door until you got fed up.
Remembering that George had given you a key to his house you dig through your purse to get your set of keys out anr unlock his door. You stomped inside his house and closed the door behind you.
"GEORGE! GEORGE!" You yelled through the house. You were being reckless and annoying, but you didnt care at this point you were fuming and needed to tell George how you feel.
You had made your way to George's recording room where he was talking to his friends on discord. George looked towards you in shock clearly not hearing the sounds you were making throughout his house.
"Y/N?!" George yelled and muted his microphone.
"What the hell are you doing?" You exclaimed back.
"Im streaming thats what Im doing!" George sassed back at you, not paying attention to his screen and the chat.
"Dont get smart with me. End the stream."
"What?! No!"
"You heard me, we need to talk." You crossed your arms across your chest. Your heart was beating too fast for your liking and you tried to calm yourself down, but George's comments were getting to you.
George was about to unmute himself and get back to the game. "No we dont-"
"GEORGE END THE FUCKING STREAM! This is embarrassing! Talk to me cause you have some explaining to do." You snapped at him.
A silence tell upon you two and he glared at you before turning to his stream and closing it out.
"Okay guys! Go watch the other boys streams I need to go now! Bye!" George quickly ended and turned off everything.
He turned around to you still sitting in his chair. "What? What do you want?"
"Do you know what today is?" You asked.
"April 30th." George answered bluntly.
"Thats all you have to say?" You asked in shock. "It's our anniversary dickhead!"
"I fucking know that." George said.
"You do? So why did you start streaming and we had dinner plans?!"
"I told you we were streaming! You weren't listening to me!" George stood up from his chair when he said that.
"When the fuck did you tell me this?!"
"A couple days ago! You didn't listen!"
"But you knew that was our anniversary! And we made dinnerr plans-"
George yelled over you. "A month ago! We made those plans a month ago so excuse me for forgetting!"
"So all these other years you remembered our anniversary and went out of your fucking way to cancel other plans around that date, but today you didnt because why?!" Tears were threatening to fall down you cheeks, but you wouldnt let him see you like that.
"Because I planned this already with the boys! And AGAIN you werent listening to me when I said that-"
"There were several other times that you could've told me too! But you didn't!" You sniffed trying to keep the frustrated tears inside.
"I already planned this and I cant go back on my promise-"
"But you can with me?!" You yelled and George stopped talking. He's just studying your face at this point and you hated this silence.
"Its not important apparently." You said while walking out of the recording room.
"You're being a bitch." He mumbled.
"Excuse me?! That is so disrespectful!" You spun around yelled at him.
"You already made me feel like shit so might as well finish me off." George said in a annoying tone.
"Yeah you should feel like shit! I feel like shit too so-!" You threw your hands up in exasperation and stormed out the room. You had made it to the door before George called out to you again.
"Y/n! Y/n! Please!"
"No! Just..." You paused before opening the door and ushering your way out. "Call me when you get your shit together.
You were currently curled up on your couch eating leftovers that you had in the refrigerator. That had satisfied your hunger for the night because the dinner was canceled that night. Your anger and sadness had subsided and you were only left with an unusual feeling in your heart. Your relationship felt incomplete, this fight felt incomplete. You didnt break up with him, but you were waiting for closure.
The TV was the only light in the room. It illuminated what it wanted to, you didnt care if it was too dark. Usually you would be cuddled up with George at this ungoldy hour, but you weren't and that made you tear up.
Your sadness was still there, your anger towards George turned into pity. You were sad about the actions he took, but somewhere in your heart you could forgive him. You could forgive and move on if he would come to you.
Speaking of, you had a knock on your door. You didn't have the strength to get up, but you did. Shuffling your way to the door you sluggishly opened it to find George standing there with his hands in his hoodie. The person you wanted to see, but at the same time you wanted to slam that door in his face.
"Hey." George spoke and you gave him a small smile, nothing more.
You turned around to find your seat back on the couch where you were comfortable, but also giving him a silent invitation to come inside. You had sat down on the couch not paying attention to George, but you knew he closed the door, took off his shoes by yours, and put his keys on the table by the door like he always did. It was like a routine to him.
George ended up awkwardly standing beside the couch as you ignored him.
"You know, if you didnt open the door I would've used my keys like you did." George tried to spark up a conversation, but you only hummed in response. You were scared that if you spoke, you would cry.
George ended up making his way to the couch sitting beside you and pulling you into his embrace. Your head was on his chest and you began to sob. You missed this it's only been a few hours, but you had felt that in those few hours you had lost everything. You continued to sob into his hoodie as he rubbed your back and shushed you, whispering sweet nothings into the air only for you to hear.
"Im here, and Im sorry. Im so fucking sorry that I did this to you and I only hope that you can forgive me." George said, his voice cracking a little when he said that. You kept crying.
That's what you wanted to hear all along, that's what you needed. You could forgive him in due time, you always will because you love him, you will always love him. You both can always make it right.
#mcyt blurb#mcyt angst#mcyt fluff#mcyt x reader#mcyt headcanons#technowoah!#george not found x reader#georgenotfound x oc#georgenotfound x y/n#georgenotfound x reader#georgenotfound fluff#gnf x reader#mcyt imagine#mcyt x y/n#mcyt x you#mcyt fanfiction#gender nuetral reader#mcyt imagines#im so slow on requests#i hope you like this#gnf fanfiction#georgenotfound imagine#im behind#dream team x y/n#dream team x reader#feral boys x reader#feral boys imagines#dream smp x reader#mcyt hc#writing prompt
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Seasons of Med: Season 2 and Seasons of PD: Season 4: Necessities, Love, & Care (A Halstead Brothers + Halstead Sister! Imagine)
Your age: 15
Jay's age: 29
Will's age: 31
You were currently sitting at the library, trying to figure out how you'd get food for dinner. It was January and you had run out of your Christmas money two weeks ago and you had burned through your money from helping with kettle corn at the beginning of December. Right now you were SOL: Shit outta luck.
Your mind wandered back to the last day you had helped working the kettle corn stand when it was a dreary late October day.
"We have kettle corn, caramel corn, cheddar, Chicago style, and a few other flavors," you explained to a customer. She picked up a medium bag of caramel corn. "That one?"
"Yes, dear. Me and my husband love this stuff," the old lady said.
"I'm sure. It's really good! It'll be six dollars." She pulled out a five and two ones. "I'll be right back with your change."
"Oh, no, keep the change, dear. Thank you for the popcorn."
"You're welcome. Have a nice day."
"Y/N," Emma said to you. "Can you grab me a lemonade from the cooler?"
"Just one?"
"Yup, just one."
You grabbed it from the cooler and were about to pass it to her when you saw who her customers were: Jay and Erin.
"Y/N?" Jay asked. "What are you doing here?"
"Working," you answered quickly. "Little bit of extra money never hurt anybody. The real question is, what are you doing here? I know Erin hates being outside when the weather is crappy."
"It's because he's annoying when he whines and begs to do something, so I figured it was just best to give in," Erin answered.
Jay rolled his eyes. "God, I can't win with either of you. Why do you always gang up on me?"
"Because, Halstead, us girls gotta stick together," Erin laughed.
"Okay, okay, fine. Y/N, what popcorn should I get?"
"First of all, it's kettle corn," you corrected. "And, I suggest the cheddar. Or, if you want a combination of both salty and sweet, then get the Chicago style. It's cheddar and caramel."
"Me and Erin like sweet, but I know you. You like cheddar. And you'll pick out the cheddar pieces when you're at my apartment, so I'll get the Chicago style."
"Or," Erin started as she picked up a large bag of caramel and a large bag of cheddar, "We could get this big bag of caramel, and then you could have this bag at your apartment for Y/N. That way the flavors aren't touching."
"Erin Lindsay and not liking her food touching. Fine, we'll take what Erin suggested and one lemonade."
"One or two straw holes?" Emma asked, picking up the lid-punching tool.
"One's fine," Jay answered.
"They swap enough spit as it is," you whispered to Emma, causing her to laugh.
"What'd she say?" Jay asked.
"I can't tell you. It's a secret."
He huffed. "Fine. Keeping secrets from your big brother? That's cold Y/N, that's cold."
"So you're saying you never kept secrets from Will?" Erin asked.
"I have the right to remain silent."
"Exactly," Erin said. "How much does he owe you?"
"Excuse me? I didn't know I'd be the one paying for all of this."
"You were the one who dragged me outside, so yes, you are paying, Halstead. Now, get your card ready."
Jay rolled his eyes and pulled out his wallet. "How much?"
You did the math in your head. "$23."
"Emma, can you check her math?" Jay asked and you rolled your eyes in his lack of faith in you.
"$10 for the cheddar and $8 for the caramel makes $18...plus $5 for the lemonade...yup $23."
You handed him the card reader. "And now it's just going to ask you a few questions," you told him after his card went through.
Without allowing him to read it all the way through, Erin hit the tip and no receipt buttons. "Hey!" Jay exclaimed.
"Don't blame me! You were the one who wanted me to come out here!" She turned to you and took the bag of kettle corn as Jay picked up the 32 oz lemonade. "Thanks, Y/N!"
"No problem! Just make sure he doesn't buy any more paintings of motorcycles!"
Man, how you wished you could work that job right now because it was only for a few hours on the weekends. But, it was winter now, so there were no street fairs, farmers markets, or festivals going on. Because of this, your money had run out. You'd have to do what you'd have to get yourself some food, even if it would leave you with a guilty conscience.
With that in mind, you got up and left the library.
***
"Pop's been complaining of chest pain and refuses to go to the hospital," Jay told his older brother as he walked through the front door and into the living room.
"Of course he did," Will grumbled. Then, he turned to his father. "This won't take long. Unless it's bad. Then you'll have to come with me and actually go to the hospital this time."
"You can't force me to do anything," he argued as he watched his oldest son open up his medical bag.
"Just let him do his job. He knows what he's doing," Jay agreed with Will. Then, he remembered something. "Where's Y/N?"
"At school."
"At school? At 5 pm?" Jay asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Sometimes she stays after school and does homework. She's always home before it gets too late so I don't ask."
It's not like Jay and Will could have known this, though. Yes, you would talk and they're obviously there for you because they're your brothers, but your dad's parenting skills--or lack thereof--hadn't ever come up. You'd get together with your brothers once a week, but it was usually at one of your brothers' places. They rarely came inside your and your dad's place.
"All units, we have reports of a robbery at 3020 East Main Street. Assistance requested," Jay's radio stated.
Jay looked to Will, silently asking if it was okay for him to take it. "I've got it from here."
"Thanks, man," Jay said, clapping Will on the back and leaving the house.
He drove to the small corner market that had made the call. It was only a block away from where you and your dad lived, but despite it usually being somewhat slow, today it was even slower. There was only one car parked in the lot, so Jay was confused as to who would even rob this place.
He put on his vest and walked into the store. "Got a call about a robbery," he said to the store manager as he entered.
"Yes, right over here."
He led Jay over to where a girl was sitting on a stool, tears rolling down her face. She held a box of pasta, a loaf of bread, and a small jar of peanut butter. Her coat was unzipped, revealing the tampons and pads she had stuffed inside her coat after she had ripped open the box.
"Y/N?" Jay asked in disbelief. "What are you doing? What were you even thinking?"
"I- I'm sorry," you sniffled.
Then he turned to the store manager. "You called the cops on a fifteen-year-old girl for grabbing what looks to me like necessities?"
"I've let her go the past two times when she needed things, but today she didn't have the money, so I couldn't let it slide."
Jay threw $30 in the man's hand. "There. Now it's all paid for." He turned to you and took the loaf of bread. "C'mon."
You followed him out of the store, waiting to be yelled at as you entered his truck, but it didn't come. He pinched the bridge of his nose as he handed you the bread. "Why? Why did you do this?"
"There- There's barely any food in the house. I was just hungry."
Jay looked you up and down. He hadn't been really looking for changes in weight like he told Natalie he would do six months ago. He kept it up for a few months and then winter came around and it was hard to tell because of bulky jackets and sweaters. But, now that he actually looked at your face and hands in an investigative manner, it was clear as day: You had lost even more weight.
"And the other stuff?" he asked.
"Dad won't buy them for me. Says that they're too expensive and to just use something else. He said that if he had had a son he wouldn't have to worry about it, like it's my fault. Usually, I take some from school, but I ran out and I needed them."
"And the food?" Jay asked as he started driving back to his childhood home.
"I get breakfast and lunch at school, but I have to eat dinner at home. And on weekends I just skip meals and eat breakfast and dinner."
"What? What about Dad?"
"He gets takeout or he goes to the bar and isn't home until late."
Jay sighed as he pulled into the driveway. "Go pack a bag, kid. You're staying at my place until further notice."
"Really? I thought you guys forgot about me?"
"We could never forget about you. It's just, work has been busy for both of us. So, sorry if these last few times we've all been together for dinner have seemed a little rushed. Now, go inside and grab your stuff while I have a chat with Will and Dad."
"Dad, Will," Jay said after you had run upstairs and they were sitting on the couch. "I need to talk to you. In the kitchen."
"Really, Jay. Why can't it be here?" your dad grumbled. "First he--" He pointed to Will. "Wants to take me to the hospital because he said I have a valve issue and now I can't even have a conversation with my sons while sitting down?"
"Just get up, dammit!"
The three entered the kitchen and sat down, but Jay stayed standing. "Jay, what's going on?" Will asked.
Instead of answering his older brother, Jay just opened the fridge. There was a half drank gallon of milk, a jar of grape jelly, and a can of pasta sauce, along with other condiments, and a lone egg sat on a shelf. "This? This is what you expect your daughter to eat? I caught her stealing from a store just so she could get food and tampons!"
"Well, I'm not gonna pay for it."
"Excuse you?" Will exclaimed, eyebrows raised in surprise. "What do you mean you're not paying for it? She's your daughter, isn't she? Then you have a legal responsibility to feed her, make sure she has shelter, clothes, and goes to school!"
"She can go get a job."
"She is fucking fifteen!" Jay yelled. "She doesn't need to be worrying about where her next meal is coming from! She's supposed to be worrying about getting a good grade on a math test or if that boy likes her or not, but not that!"
"She needs to learn to grow up someday. And she won't if you boys baby her like you always do whenever you see her."
"Baby her?" Will yelled, disgusted. "She's a kid. She needs to be babied sometimes. She needs fucking food and a nice home to come home to, not whatever the hell you think this is."
"It hasn't been a home since your mother died."
"Yeah, we gathered that," Jay scoffed. "But you don't have to take it out on her."
"Jay," your small voice said from the doorway into the kitchen. All three men looked over to you, your backpack on your back, a duffle bag slung over your shoulder, and your favorite blanket wadded up in your hands so that you could carry it without it dragging on the ground.
"Ready to go?" Jay asked, his voice immediately softening.
"Uh, yeah," you answered, unsure of how your dad would react.
"What do you mean ready to go?" Pat Halstead asked, standing up from where he had been previously sitting at the table. "She's not going anywhere!"
Will rushed over to you, placing a hand on your shoulder while Jay stalked over to be face to face with your dad. "She is coming with me until further notice. You're lucky I don't arrest your ass for child neglect!"
"You wouldn't do that to your own father!"
Jay pulled the cuffs out of his back pocket. "Oh yeah? Try me."
He sat back down and Jay turned to you. "Here, let me take that." You handed him your duffle bag and followed him and Will outside.
"Jay, I gotta go. I gotta get Dad to Med to get the valve fixed. And, I said one hour out of the hospital tops and it's been two."
Jay closed the truck door once you were safely inside with all your stuff. "Good luck trying to get Dad to go the hospital," he scoffed. "Get going. Don't give Goodwin another reason to fire your stupid ass."
"I'll call an ambulance if I have to." Then, Will smacked Jay upside the head.
"Ow! What was that for?"
"You know what it was for. And, I'm your older brother, it's my job."
"I'm your older brother, it's my job," Jay mocked. "But, in all seriousness, do me a favor and make sure Y/N's all caught up on her immune- immune--"
"Immunizations?" Will laughed.
"Yeah, those."
"I'll do that. And if she's not, I'll give them to her tonight when I come over to your place after my shift is done...which will be in like two hours...depending on how much of a pain in the ass he is to get in the hospital."
Jay nodded, and then got in the truck, both of you making your way to his place.
"I'm gonna go take a shower," Jay said after you had put your stuff down by the couch. "You have homework?"
"Yeah," you looked down, not wanting to even try and struggle through your homework...or have Jay sign the slip that said that you failed your last test.
Jay smiled. "I'll help you with it when I'm out of the shower, okay, kid?"
"How'd you know--"
"That is the universal facial expression of I need help, but I don't know how to ask for it. I'll be ten minutes tops."
And so, you tried to struggle through your homework for ten minutes. But, you ended up working and reworking the stupid algebra problem. Why did math need letters anyway?
"Okay, I'm back," Jay said as he pulled a chair out to sit next to you. "What are you workin' on?"
"Can you sign this first?" you asked, sliding the yellow paper over to him along with the pen. You hoped he'd just sign it blind, but as you saw his eyes skimming the page, you knew that wouldn't happen.
"Did you try your best?" he asked as he slid the piece of paper back to you after signing it.
"What? Yeah, of course, I did."
"Okay, then we'll figure something out. Now, how about we eat some dinner? I've got pizza in the freezer. That okay?"
"That's great," you answered.
Jay got the pizza in the oven while you went and changed into your pajamas. You decided it was in your best interest to have Will help you with your math homework.
***
"Ah! The man of the hour!" Jay exclaimed as he pulled out the pizza and Will entered the house.
You immediately noticed the red bag he was carrying over his shoulder and the two king-sized Twix bars.
"Why do you have your medical bag?" you asked.
"How did you know this was my medical bag?"
"I'm not stupid, Will."
"Okay, so you're all caught up on your shots, but I need to do a blood draw because I need to see if you're deficient in any vitamins and minerals. Have you been eating enough fruits and veggies?" he asked.
"Probably not as much as I should," you admitted. "They're too expensive unless I get the canned kind and I don't like those unless it's canned peaches. I'm sorry."
"It's okay, Short Stack. None of this is your fault. You hear me? None of it. I just need to take the blood and then get it sent to the lab to see if you need to get any specific pills to get your vitamin and mineral levels up."
"Okay. Does it hurt?" you asked. You knew what a shot felt like, but you'd never had your blood drawn before, so you didn't know what it felt like to have a needle in your arm for a long time, taking blood. You knew what it felt like to have an IV in from when you passed out at the movie theater, but you didn't know if this needle would be the same size or bigger.
"You just feel a slight pinch at the beginning."
"Like getting a shot?"
"Like getting a shot," he confirmed.
"Hey, I was thinking," Jay started as he reappeared from the kitchen area, "what if we have celery and carrots with ranch for dinner, too? You know, like when we eat chicken wings at restaurants and they bring you some veggies, except we'll have ours with pizza."
"Okay," you agreed. "I like ranch."
"So does everyone in the midwest," Will joked.
"What's the medical bag for?" Jay asked. "She needs shots? And, what's with the Twix bars?"
"No, I'm drawing her blood to see if she's deficient in anything. And, there's one Twix bar for her and one for you because we all know how you feel about needles, Jay."
Jay rolled his eyes. "We doing this before we eat?"
"Yes. And, I need you to answer some questions for me, Y/N. These are strictly doctor protocol questions, okay? You don't need to be embarrassed about any of the answers."
You nodded.
"Okay," Will started, "When did you last eat? Just need to write it down for fasting glucose levels."
"Um, lunch at school, so around noon."
"So, six-hour fast," Will scribbled down on a piece of paper. "Next one, are you sexually active?"
"Will!"
"It's just standard protocol, just in case I need to test for STDs."
"No, I am not. Next question."
"Okay, last one: When was your last period?"
"You've got to be kidding me. I'm not pregnant, I haven't had sex!"
Will chuckled. "It's not for that. Sometimes when people are deficient in vitamins and minerals, they can lose their period for months at a time, signaling that their body isn't healthy. The medical term is amenorrhea." But, what he wanted to say was that when girls are underweight, this can also happen. And, from seeing how baggy your sweatshirt and jeans were on you, he assumed that you'd lost ten pounds since last going to the doctor when you passed out in the movie theater parking lot, making your weight loss a grand total of 25 pounds, which would qualify you as being underweight.
"Oh. I started today."
"Okay, good to know. Any changes in length or heaviness of menstruation?"
"I swear, I'd rather have Natalie or April be asking me these questions," you grumbled. "But, yes, it's a lot lighter and it went from me having my periods for five days to two days. Can we please stop talking about this now?"
"Yeah, we're all done. Sorry about that, but it's protocol."
"Says the guy who's drawing my blood at Jay's apartment instead of in a hospital, where it should be done."
"Hey, I've worked in much worse conditions than this in Sudan. How much water did you drink today?"
"A lot."
"Okay, good." Will started to unzip his medical bag. He passed a Twix bar to Jay. "Here, eat this and focus on it so you don't focus on the needles and then freak out."
Jay rolled his eyes, but took the candy bar and unwrapped it.
"Do I get one?" you asked.
"Once I draw your blood, yes, the other one is for you. Now, right or left arm?"
You held out your left arm and Will moved to the other side of you so he had a better angle. He sanitized his hands and then snapped on a pair of gloves.
"So, what do you do?" you asked. "I've never had my blood drawn before."
"I just tie off your arm so that I can get the veins to show a bit better, wipe down the spot with an antiseptic wipe, stick the needle in, and then wait for the vial to fill up."
"That's it?"
"That's it. Can you make a fist with your left hand for me?"
You did as Will told you and then he tied a band around your bicep and started touching the inside of your elbow, trying to get some veins to show. He furrowed his eyebrows and moved down your arm, rubbing your forearm and then going back up to the crook of your elbow and gently pressing there.
"What's wrong?" you asked.
"You just have really small veins is all. I could take the blood from the big vein in your forearm, but I don't really want to do that one since it's so big. Can you squeeze your fist tighter for me?" You did as he said while he kept pressing on the crook of your elbow. "There we go. Got one. Now, turn and look at Jay while I get the needle ready."
You looked at Jay and tried not to laugh. "You okay?"
"Me? I should be asking you that," he replied. "You're the one who's about to get stabbed with a needle."
"It's just that you got some sweat on your forehead. You look nervous."
"They're needles. They're tiny little sharp metal objects and if one breaks off--"
"Jay, respectfully," Will started, cutting off his brother, "shut the hell up, so you don't scare my patient. You might just want to look away instead of watching me. Then you might feel fine." Then, he turned back to you. "Okay, Y/N, keep looking at Jay. Close your eyes if you want to. You're going to feel a small pinch."
You closed your eyes and took a deep breath. Then, you squeezed your eyes shut tightly and grit your teeth, trying not to yell out as the needle pierced your skin.
"Hard part's done," Will said. You nodded, still keeping your eyes closed.
"That was not a small pinch," you retorted about a minute later.
"Sorry."
You opened your eyes and watched as the blood flowed from your vein into the small tube that was hooked up to the needle.
"I thought you hated blood," Jay pointed out. "And here you are, watching the entire process."
"I'm fine when it's my blood if it's not a huge, deep cut," you explained. "It's other people's blood I don't like."
"Well, that takes any job in the medical field off your career choices," Will said.
You sat there for a few more minutes, waiting for the vial to fill up. Will pressed on your arm, close to the needle, to see if more would come out. "This vein is really small," he said.
You watched as the blood coming into the tube started becoming slower and slower, in what looked to be bubbles.
"Just a little more," Will muttered.
You started taking deeper breaths as you felt sweat start to bead on your forehead.
"Okay, let's see how much this gave me." He pressed his thumb above where the needle was and you turned back to Jay as he removed the needle.
Then, he got the blood into the vial. "Bad news," he started, "I might need to take more. Let's see how much extra there is." He put the extra into another, smaller vial. "Yeah, this one clotted too, so bad news, we need more."
You nodded and closed your eyes, feeling your face get hot and starting to feel lightheaded. You pinched the bridge of your nose, willing this uncomfortable feeling to go away.
"You doing okay?" Will asked.
"Yeah," you answered.
"Okay, I'm gonna do your right arm this time." You held your right arm out to him. "Make a fist for me." You did as he told you and he tied the blue band around your bicep.
But, you were getting even dizzier. "Actually, can I get some water? I feel dizzy."
"Course," Will said. "Jay, can you get her some water and juice if you have any?"
"Apple juice good?"
"That's fine," you answered.
Will untied the band from your bicep. "We're just going to wait a few minutes until you feel less dizzy before I take more blood, okay?"
You nodded and took the water from Jay when he came back.
"Let's have the juice after I finish," Will suggested after a few minutes had passed and you finished the water. "Feeling better, Short Stack?"
"Yeah, let's get this over with." Your forehead was still a bit sweaty, but you were a lot less dizzy.
Will repeated the same process as the last arm and it went a lot faster. Turns out he picked a bit bigger vein in the crook of your elbow of this arm than he did the other one.
"And, we're done," Will said as he capped the vial.
He handed you the juice. "Thanks," you said. "That was not fun."
"I bet. At least you didn't pass out. I've had a few patients do that when I went through my clinicals. That's why normally when someone gets their blood drawn, they sit in this chair where something is flipped down in front of them so they don't fall out of the chair just in case they pass out."
"Jay, do you pass out?" you asked.
He scoffed. "No. I don't even get dizzy. My body doesn't react like that."
"He just breaks out into a sweat whenever he sees needles," Will whispered, loud enough for Jay to hear.
"Hey! I heard that! Take one more jab at me and you won't be getting any pizza, Will. I mean it!"
Will held his hands up in a mock surrender while you finished up your juice. Then, Will started to pack up his medical stuff and Jay brought the pizza and veggies and ranch out, along with plates of course.
You ate your pizza while Will helped you with your math homework. Once you finished two slices of pizza and some celery and ranch, you said that you were done.
"You sure?" Jay asked. "You can have as much as you want."
"I'm good. Gotta save some for tomorrow." Your eyes widened as you realized what you had just said. "I'm gonna go take a shower. It's been a long day."
"Okay, clean towels are in the cabinet in the bathroom where they always are," Jay said, trying not to react to what you had just said even though he knew exactly what you were doing.
You were rationing food.
"Fuck," Jay said as he put his head in his hands when he knew you were in the bathroom and out of earshot.
"What? What did she mean by gotta save some for tomorrow?" Will asked.
"She's rationing it. I used to do it in Afghanistan. Save some of my MRE and put it in my pack to eat the next day if I was on a long trek and we knew we wouldn't get back to base. It would be cold and usually disgusting, but I'd choke it down because it was calories and I needed fuel to be sharp in case we came in contact with combatants."
"Poor kid. At least we had Mom."
Jay nodded. "What happened with Dad at the hospital?"
"Had to have a mitral valve replacement because his wasn't working properly. Told him over and over to get his checked regularly, but he didn't because he's stubborn. He went for the non-surgical option first, but then there were complications, so Rhodes performed surgery. He's fine."
"That's good... I guess." Jay glanced around and he saw your duffle bag sitting outside the bathroom door. You had grabbed your clothes to bring them into the bathroom and left your open duffle bag by the door.
Jay stood up and started walking towards it.
"What are you doing?" Will hissed.
"I need to see if she's got anything else in there that will help prove neglect. I'm assuming it needs to be proved...I only know criminal court cases, don't know much about family court cases."
"What do you mean family court? You're going to fight Dad to be able to take care of her?"
"Yeah, I'll fight to be her legal guardian. Unless you want to do it. My loan went through for a new apartment, which has two bedrooms, so I figured I might be better suited."
"Go ahead. You'd probably have a better chance anyway because you were around more when I was in New York."
Jay nodded and started to dig around your duffle bag. He chuckled and pulled out your Build-A-Bear. "She still sleeps with Beary," he said as he held up the stuffed bear. "Probably doesn't change his clothes anymore because she's too old for that, but he's in pajamas."
"Remember that military uniform you got for her bear? Mom said she barely took Beary out of that because she missed you so much."
"Yeah, and if she wouldn't have dropped him at the airport, I might not have met Mouse."
The two fell into a comfortable silence as he continued to dig through your bag. He got to a big zip-lock bag full of pieces of fabric that were stained light reds and browns.
"Will, c'mere," Jay said, waving him over. Will squatted down next to Jay. "You know what this is?"
Will sighed. "Unfortunately, yes. I saw a lot of this when I worked in Sudan."
"Well, what is it?"
"So, when girls don't have access or money to buy feminine hygiene products, they'll use scraps of fabric and wash them. Looks to me like she cut up some, um, she cut up some underwear and then used them as make-shift pads. If they aren't taken care of properly, she could end up with an infection. And, if she tried to use them as tampons instead of pads, it could lead to TSS, which stands for Toxic Shock Syndrome."
"We're gonna have to talk to her about this now, aren't we?"
"Unfortunately, yeah. She's not gonna be happy you dug through her stuff, so I'll let you explain why you were going through it. And, if she used them as tampons, I want her to get a pelvic exam, just to make sure she didn't get any infections. Much more likely to get an infection from tampons than pads."
Jay nodded. He hated having the current conversation and knew he was going to hate the next one even more, but he knew he had to do these things if he wanted to petition the court for legal guardianship.
Jay picked up your duffle bag and brought it to the living room and he set the zip-lock bag full of pieces of fabric on top.
"I can't believe we missed this," Will said. "I mean, we're both trained in how to spot abuse and we couldn't even spot it in our little sister."
"There weren't outright signs," Jay said. "No bruising, limping, cuts, burns, nothing like that. And, it's winter, it's easy to hide the weight loss. But, I still agree with you. If we would've spotted it earlier, we could've gotten her out of there."
"I'm pretty sure she's officially underweight now."
Jay ran a hand through his hair and then stood back up. "I'm gonna go put clean sheets on my bed. I'll let Y/N take it tonight so that we can keep talking out here when she goes to sleep."
"Good idea."
A few minutes later, Jay was back on the couch next to Will and you walked out of the bathroom, wearing a baggy t-shirt and some sweatpants that you had to keep pulling up because they were too big on you now, and a pair of fuzzy socks. You were cold all the time now and wanted your hoodie out of your duffle and wanted to put your dirty clothes in there, but when you looked down to the spot where you thought you had put it, it wasn't there.
"Guys?" you asked. "Have you seen my bag?"
You walked over to the kitchen table where your blanket was sitting on the chairs and wrapped that around yourself instead.
You furrowed your eyebrows as you saw your brothers on the couch, your duffle bag in front of them on the floor, and on top, your bag of ripped-up, old underwear that you used as pads when you didn't have any.
"You went through my stuff?" you asked, starting to become angry.
"Y/N," Jay started, "I know you're mad and it was me who went through it and not Will, so don't be mad at him, be mad at me. But, I went through it to see if anything was in there that could help me get you out of dad's house. Permanently."
"You- You want to have custody of me?" you asked.
A small smile appeared on Jay's lips and he nodded. "It wouldn't be considered custody because I'm not your biological parent, it would be considered guardianship, but yes, I want you to stay with me. And, my loan went through for a new apartment, so you'd have your own room and everything."
"Okay."
Jay looked at Will, not wanting to be the one to start this conversation. And, he figured Will would be the best one to start it because he was a doctor.
"Y/N, we need to ask you about these." Will motioned to the zip-lock bag on top of your stuff.
You sat in the loveseat across from them and looked down at your feet.
"It's okay, you're not in trouble," Will continued. "We just want to know how you used them in case you need to get a pelvic exam to check for infections in that area."
Your lip began to tremble as tears started to roll down your cheeks. "I used them as pads," you said quietly. "Dad wouldn't buy me any and I stopped getting them from school because I thought they'd suspect something was wrong if I- if I kept taking them."
"One more question," Will said softly. "I just need to know in case we need to take you in for this. I know you said you used them as pads, but did you ever try and use them as tampons?"
"No. I only used them as pads," you whispered. "I was scared to use them as tampons." You looked up at your brothers, who both had tears in their eyes. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry," you rushed. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner I was just--" You let out a wail and Jay got up and knelt in front of you.
"Hey, hey, none of this is your fault. Do you hear me? Absolutely none of this is on you. It's all on Dad. Every single bit of it. You are not the one to blame."
You launched yourself into his arms, crying out every emotion you had felt these past few months: anger, frustration, fear, sadness, it was all coming out now.
And, Jay just held you and let you cry it out because that was what your guys' mom used to do for him. And, he knew it worked.
Twenty minutes later, your wails were just quiet whimpers and you pushed yourself back up onto the loveseat, where Will had moved to the spot next to you. He wrapped an arm around you and you leaned into him, craving the comfort that had been denied to you for so long.
"You still have that Twix bar?" you asked.
"All that crying made you hungry, didn't it, Short Stack?" Will asked as Jay got up to retrieve the candy bar from the table.
You nodded.
"Thank you," you said when Jay handed you the Twix bar. You unwrapped it and broke it into the two sticks. "You guys want any?" They both shook their heads: they knew you needed to get as many calories in you as possible.
Jay sighed, he might as well get this hard conversation over with you tonight as well. "Y/N, you can eat as much as you want. I won't say anything about you eating too much, okay?"
You looked up from your candy bar. "You won't call me a burden because I'm eating your food? Like Dad did?"
"He said that?" Will asked, giving Jay a look that read when I see him next, I can't be held accountable for my actions.
"Yeah. One time there were some leftovers he had gotten from a bar and I was so hungry and it was the middle of the night, so I took them out and heated them up. The microwave timer must've woken him up because he came out just as I was about to start eating and then he yelled at me for eating his food and called me a burden."
"Well, we don't think that. Neither Will nor me think that," Jay told you. "And you can eat as much as you want."
You yawned as you crumpled up your Twix wrapper.
"Tired?" Will asked.
"Yeah," you mumbled.
"It's been a long day," Jay said. "You can take my bed."
"Jay, it's your apartment, I can't--"
"Y/N, this isn't up for discussion. I already put clean sheets on the bed for you."
"Is- Is there a fan in your room? I can't sleep without white noise."
"There is. You want me and Will to tuck you in?"
"I'm too old for that." You stood up and Will did, too. "Jay, can you hand me Beary? He should be in my duffle."
"Here you go, kid."
You took your bear and held him loosely in your arm. Then, you enveloped Jay in a hug and did the same for Will.
"I love you guys."
"We love you, too," Will said.
"Now get to sleep. You've still got school in the morning. I'll be here when you wake up."
"Dad sometimes wouldn't be home when I woke up for school. He'd be at a friend's house sleeping off a hangover from the night before or just sleeping."
Jay furrowed his eyebrows. "Doesn't he have to work?"
"He does work, but only a few days a week. The other days, he stays out really late and then comes home either drunk or hungover."
"I see," Jay stated. "Well I won't be doing that, I can promise you that."
"I know. You aren't like Dad. Neither of you are." You yawned again. "I'm going to bed, goodnight."
A few minutes later, you were out like a light and Will was still at Jay's apartment.
"So, Abby called me the other day," Will started. "She's looking for you. Says she's in town for a few days and wants to meet up."
"Oh yeah? She say why?" Jay asked, wondering why his ex-wife--who was the result of a blackout drunk wedding in Vegas, a thing that lasted only 24 hours tops--was in Chicago and was looking for him of all people.
"She said you two are still married."
Jay threw his head back against the couch and closed his eyes. "You have got to be fucking kidding me."
***
"Morning," Jay said as he stood at the stove flipping some eggs. "Sleep good?"
"I slept really good. Didn't even hear you wake up."
"Fan did the trick then?"
You nodded and grabbed a mug from the cupboard and went to start pouring yourself a cup of coffee.
"Nuh-uh," Jay chirped, putting his hand on the handle of the coffee pot as well.
"Why not? I drank it at Dad's."
Jay raised an eyebrow. "You drank coffee at Dad's?"
"Yeah, on the weekends sometimes that would be my breakfast because it curbs my appetite and there wasn't a lot to eat."
Jay sighed. "Well, you'll have enough to eat here, I can promise you that. And, coffee stunts your growth."
"Jay," you groaned. "I haven't grown since sixth grade."
"Okay, well, then you don't want to become dependent on it at such an early age, then. Come talk to me when you're a legal adult or in college."
"Fine." You let go of the coffee pot and put the mug back in the cupboard.
"You can have juice though." The toast in the toaster popped up and Jay placed the toast on a plate and then put a slice of cheese on each piece and then an egg on top. He also put a small bowl of strawberries next to it. "I'm gonna go get dressed while you eat. And then, once you're ready, I'll take you to school."
"Okay, thanks, Jay."
"You're welcome, kiddo."
You rolled your eyes at the nickname and then went to the fridge to get the apple juice. When you opened the fridge, you saw a brown paper bag with your name on it. Curiosity got the best of you, so you took it out and looked at the contents while you ate your breakfast.
Inside was a ham and Colby jack cheese sandwich with lettuce, pickles, mustard, and mayonnaise, an apple, a coconut-flavored Greek yogurt, celery with peanut butter, and a chocolate chip granola bar. There were also two dollars at the bottom of the bag paperclipped together with a sticky note stuck to the top.
For chocolate milk. ~Jay was what the note read.
Tears sprung to your eyes as you continued to eat your breakfast. You don't remember the last time you brought a lunch to school; you'd always get your lunch for free at school. When you got the paper from school about the free/reduced lunch because teachers noticed you didn't have much to eat, you waited until your dad was hungover and it was early in the morning, and handed him a pen and he signed the paper blindly. And, that's how you got lunch and breakfast at school without any cost to you or your dad.
"Hey, I can just brush my teeth at the kitchen sink if you want the bathroom--" He cut himself off when he saw the tears in your eyes. "What's wrong?"
"You- You made me lunch?" you asked as you turned to face him.
He smiled. "Of course I did. I know how bad cafeteria food can be. And, if it tastes good, it's usually not very good for you."
"Thank you," you said as you wiped a tear away that had rolled down your cheek.
"Aww, hey, don't cry, don't cry. It's okay. You're safe now. You don't need to worry about where your next meal will come from. And, I'm going to petition a judge for legal guardianship in a few days. I just have to have a few conversations with some lawyers."
"Does this mean you have to move? I don't want to kick you out of your apartment."
Jay dismissed that with a wave. "I already put in a loan application for a new apartment. Two bedrooms. Really nice."
"Can you tell me about it? While I finish eating my strawberries."
Jay nodded and sat down in the chair across from you. "It's a two-bedroom, washer, dryer. But, I know you don't care about those things. There's underground parking. It's got a gym, a whole club level, with like a coffee lounge, and all this other stuff."
"That sounds really nice."
"Yeah, it is a pretty nice building. Coffee lounge would be perfect for you to get your homework done if you don't feel like staying in the apartment."
"I thought you said I couldn't drink coffee?" you asked, raising an eyebrow.
"I meant the caffeine in the coffee. Decaf coffee and lattes and tea lattes, that's a different story. I'm sure they have pastries there, too."
"Never pegged you for a coffee snob," you joked.
"You learn a lot about coffee and about a person when you have to get your entire unit coffee. I'll let you in on a little secret: Ruzek's coffee order is the most complicated."
"Really?"
"Really. Now, go finish getting ready. Don't want you being late for school."
***
"Hey, Er, can you meet me at the diner we usually go to?" Jay asked his girlfriend over the phone after he had dropped you off at school.
"Yeah, no problem. Give me fifteen minutes. We haven't caught a case yet, but we should keep our radios on just in case. Everything okay?"
"It's a long story. I'll explain everything in person, okay?"
"Okay," Erin answered skeptically. "I'll see you in a few."
Fifteen minutes later on the dot, Erin walked into the little diner and spotted Jay sitting in the corner booth.
"Alright, what's going on?" she asked after she had ordered her food and some coffee. "You sounded really stressed on the phone."
Jay sighed. "I'm going to fight for legal guardianship of Y/N."
"What? Why? What happened?" Erin asked as she widened her eyes.
"Our dad, he uh, he hasn't really been the greatest. Not keeping food in the house, calling her a burden when she tries to eat some of his food, not buying her products for you know...girl stuff. She's probably lost like 25 pounds since the end of last school year. And, I know that doesn't sound like a lot with the amount of time that's passed, but she's underweight. Will drew some of her blood last night to see if she's deficient in some vitamins or minerals."
"My God."
"Yeah, so, I know we were going to move into your place together, but I need another bedroom and my loan went through at that place I told you about, so I'm going to put an offer in there. You could always move in with me if you want, but I don't know if it would be a good idea for that to happen right away. I just want to get Y/N healthy again. I'm sorry."
"Jay, I get it. She's family. Do you know how you're going to go about this? Did you talk to Voight about taking any time off to sort this out?"
"Not yet. But, I think I'm going to call Antonio and see if he can help me out with getting a meeting with ASA Stone. I know he works criminal cases, but he's gotta know some stuff about family court cases. So, I figured he might be able to help me with this whole process."
"Good idea. If you need any help, just say the word and I'll be there."
Jay smiled. "Thanks, Er." He didn't want to have the conversation he was about to have, but he knew he had to tell her. "There's uh, there's one more thing I need to tell you."
"Okay, what is it?"
"About eight years ago, I was married."
"Excuse me, what? You were married and you didn't tell me?"
Jay knew this was a bad idea...which was why he hadn't wanted to tell Erin, but now that he wasn't officially divorced for whatever reason, he knew needed to tell her. "Just let me explain."
"Yes, please do," Erin sneered.
"Her name's Abby. She ran Cultural Support during my last tour in Kandahar. About a year after I came home, I saw her at a funeral in Vegas. Was... was a guy in our unit, he had redeployed, and, um, he didn't... Um, I was, like, blacking out most nights, and we were both pretty shook up. And, um, we got married." He chuckled at the thought of his twenty-one-year-old self thinking that marriage was a good idea. "It was, like, a 24-hour thing, it was a total joke, and it is long over."
Erin just stared at him, as he waited to be chewed out by her. "Jay, you married this girl. And you never told me, and you were never gonna tell me," was all she said.
"I know. And, I'm sorry. But, I'm meeting up with her in a few days to sign the documents that I thought I'd signed because she's getting married and we need to make the divorce official...even though, in my mind, it's been official for eight years.
"Er, please don't hate me, but with everything going on, with me trying to get guardianship of Y/N and me finding out that I'm somehow still married--"
"You want us to take a break?" Erin asked, finishing his sentence for him.
Jay nodded. "I'm sorry. I just don't think I can juggle a relationship with all this other stuff. And, it's not fair to you."
Erin swallowed. "Well, just tell me if you need any help with Y/N. I'll always be there for you. Relationship or partnership, I'll always have your six."
"And I'll always have yours."
Erin's phone buzzed on the table and she picked it up. "It's Voight. We caught a case."
Jay laid some bills on the table. "Then let's go."
***
"Got the results of Y/N's bloodwork back," Will told Jay over the phone while he had a quick break for lunch...even though it was four o'clock in the afternoon. But, that's the thing about the medical field: breaks are never regular.
"And? Any deficiencies?" Jay asked, walking into his bedroom as you were at the table doing homework and he didn't want to distract you.
"Yes, two actually. Iron and riboflavin. The low iron explains why her periods have become shorter and lighter, but that can also be attributed to how small she is now."
"How do we go about this then?"
"I'll send you a list of foods that have levels high iron and riboflavin. Oh, riboflavin's found in vitamin B by the way."
"Okay, care to tell me what iron and riboflavin do? I know iron helps with hemoglobin and red blood cells, but I have no idea what riboflavin does."
"You're right about iron. I'm shocked. Or, what do the kids say these days? I'm shook."
"I swear to God, please never use that phrase again. And, I know what iron does because I paid attention in high school nutrition class, thank you very much."
"If I remember correctly, I helped you with most of the homework in that class."
"Whatever, you helped me. Now, tell me about riboflavin."
"So, riboflavin just helps convert food into energy and is needed for healthy skin, hair, blood, and a healthy brain." Jay could hear a beeping in the background on Will's end. "Gotta go. I'll send you that list of foods right now, though."
"Thanks, man."
You looked up as Jay came back into the kitchen. "Everything okay?" you asked.
Jay pulled out a chair and sat across from you. "So, I just got off the phone with Will. He got the results from your bloodwork back."
"Is it bad? Am I dying?" You set your pencil down, bracing yourself for bad news.
"No," Jay chuckled, "you're not dying. You just don't have enough iron and riboflavin, which is a specific B vitamin. Will sent me a list of foods that have high levels of those in them. You up for some grocery shopping? We can also grab some multivitamins that have those in them, too, just to help your levels stabilize faster."
"Okay, we can go now. I'm due for a break."
***
"So, some foods that contain riboflavin include milk, eggs, cheese, yogurt, meats, green leafy vegetables, and riboflavin enriched grains and cereals," Jay read off his phone.
"I've had a lot of those today already," you pointed out. "Eggs and cheese with breakfast. I had that yogurt for a snack at school, and I had meat and cheese on my sandwich and I had chocolate milk with my lunch at school."
That was just standard, Jay thought. He wondered what you ate when you were at your Dad's. And, he knew that if he wanted to obtain guardianship of you, he'd need to know these things.
"What did you eat at Dad's?" Jay probed.
"I mean, I barely made it to school on time most mornings because I was trying to be quiet so I didn't wake Dad, which made me move slower when getting ready. So, I'd usually just grab a small thing of dry cereal when I got to school and eat it in my first class. I never checked to see if it was one of the enriched ones. I'm sorry."
"You don't have to apologize. There's no way you could've known. Now, what did you usually have for lunch at school?"
"I always tried to get veggies with my lunch, but most of the veggies were the gross canned ones, like canned corn or green beans. I don't like those. Sometimes, they'd have little salads as a side and I'd get those. Sometimes they'd have yogurt parfaits and I'd get those. But, I'd usually go for the pre-made subs, because at least those would have veggies on them...even if it was just lettuce and pickles. I'd usually try to get an apple or banana as my side, too." You paused. "If I was getting meat and cheese from the sub and milk from my chocolate milk, then how am I deficient in this?"
"It's probably because the meat and cheese schools use is so heavily processed that there are little to no vitamins left in it," Jay answered.
"And you know this how?"
"As you get older, you acquire a lot of knowledge and one of those things is that the more processed a food is, the fewer vitamins and minerals are preserved...and I watch a lot of The Food that Built America on the History channel."
"Oh, okay. What foods are on that show?"
"Usually it's about fast food. One episode I watched last week was about ice cream and popsicles and how they came to be in America. Pretty interesting."
"Can we watch an episode tonight? That show sounds good."
"Of course." He paused in front of the fresh produce. "Take your pick. But, just make sure you get some leafy greens for the riboflavin and some fruit and other green veggies for iron."
You picked up a few things such as more apples, a bag of Clementines, bananas, spinach, carrots, and celery, and then, you shocked your brother as you picked up a bag of kale.
"Kale?" he asked. "Didn't know you liked it."
You shrugged. "I heard it tastes kind of like spinach. And, I saw a recipe on Pinterest for a salad that has kale, lemon juice, and dates. Is it okay if we try that?"
"You know, I think that would be the perfect side for dinner tonight. I'll add lemon juice and dates to the list."
"I didn't grab too many fruits and veggies, right?" you asked, not wanting to waste food or your brother's hard-earned money. "I- I can put some back if you want me to."
"Nope, it's all good. We can always freeze the bananas if they go bad for smoothies or banana bread. And, we can always turn the apples into apple sauce. Spinach and kale freeze well, too and you can't even taste them if we put them in smoothies."
"How do you know this stuff?" you asked.
"I used to watch Mom cook a lot when I was little. And, when I moved out on my own, she gave me a copy of a cookbook she always used. Said the recipes at the beginning of the book were simple enough that I wouldn't burn my apartment down."
You laughed at the thought of your mom scolding Jay if his apartment got ruined from his cooking. "Do you still have it?" you asked. "The cookbook, I mean."
"I do."
"Can we make something out of it tonight?"
"You know, I think that's a great idea." He pursed his lips. "How about Mom's chicken pot pie? I think I have some frozen peas and corn in the freezer and we can use the carrots we just grabbed in it, too."
"That sounds really good. Thank you."
"You don't have to thank me." Jay paused. He figured now would be as good a time as any to tell you. "Uh, do you remember the day that we got ice cream and went and played soccer with Ben when you were little? The night that Mom went into the hospital?"
You nodded, swallowing the lump in your throat at the memory of that day.
"Well, she told me to take care of you. There's no way I would break a promise to Mom."
"She said that?"
"Mhmm."
"It's like she knew something was going to happen."
"Mom was a smart lady. Will had to have gotten it from somewhere and he sure didn't get it from Dad."
You laughed. "Hey, you're smart, too. Just not sciency smart. You're more puzzle smart because you put the pieces together of who committed a crime." Jay laughed at your description of his job. "Oh, is the recipe for Mom's garlic mashed potatoes in that cookbook?"
"It is. Want those as a side along with the salad you mentioned?"
"Yes, please...if it's not a problem."
"They're super simple and quick to make." He scribbled on a piece of notebook paper that he had written down a few groceries on, like the salad ingredients you had mentioned. "Alright, potatoes, a rotisserie chicken, and pastry dough have all been added to the list."
***
"I'll be back later tonight, no later than midnight," Jay told you two days later on Sunday night. "I know it's not ideal because you have school in the morning, but try and get some sleep while I'm gone, okay?"
"I'm used to being home alone at night, Jay." You shrugged. "I'll be fine."
"I know, it's just that not something I want you to get used to. Feel free to eat anything you want, cook anything you want. As long as you don't burn down the house, I don't care what you make. Oh, and remember to take your multivitamin before bed."
You rolled your eyes. "I'm fifteen, not five. Now, get going. Don't want you to be late to meet that lawyer."
"Love you. I'll be back by midnight. Lock the door behind me."
"I will. Love you, too."
With that, Jay left his apartment to go meet with ASA Stone and you locked the door behind him as he told you.
***
"So, Antonio told me you have some custody questions," Peter Stone said once he closed the door of his office.
"That's right," Jay replied as he took a seat in front of Stone's desk and turned his phone completely off and Stone took a seat in his chair behind his desk.
"Didn't know you had a kid, Halstead."
"No, I don't actually," Jay chuckled. "I have a kid sister. Name's Y/N and she's fifteen."
"Okay, and why do you want guardianship then?"
"When me and Will, my older brother, were kids, our dad kinda checked out on parenting us when we hit our mid-teens. But, we had our mom around, so it was okay. I went over there the other day because my dad was having some heart issues and I called Will. When I was there, I got a call of a robbery and it was Y/N. She was stealing food from a corner store because our dad wasn't feeding her," Jay explained.
"I see. So, other than her word and her stealing food, do you have any proof of this?"
"I know I should've called DCFS before letting her stay with me, but I couldn't let her stay there a minute longer, Peter. She's lost like 25 pounds in the past six months and she's deficient in both iron and vitamin B."
"Okay, what we have to do is petition for guardianship in front of a judge. I can help you with the documents and I can even represent you at the hearing if you want."
"Wow, yeah, that'd be great. Thank you."
"Anything else you want to tell me about your dad? Any physical or emotional abuse?"
"Not technically, but there is something else." And then Jay launched into all the information you had told him two days ago.
"Okay. And, you know your dad could theoretically press kidnapping charges against you because you took his kid without his permission?"
"I do. But he was basically starving her. No jury would find me guilty."
"I'm not going to argue with you about that one because I agree with you."
"So, do you think I have a chance of getting guardianship over Y/N?"
"In theory, yes. But, most judges like to keep the child with their biological parents. But, seeing as Y/N's fifteen, she does get some say in who she stays with," Stone explained. "When we have a custody or guardianship battle, we use the child's best interest standard. This means that you must prove that you are capable of providing food, clothing, housing, medical care, and a stable home life for Y/N. There will be one or two home visits before appearing before a judge, just to let you know."
"I'm aware of that. And, I just put an offer in on a new apartment with two bedrooms this morning and they're pretty quick in responding, so I should know in the next few days whether or not I got it."
"That's a good start. And you are financially stable to raise her until she turns eighteen, so three more years?"
"I am."
"Alright, let's start on those documents then. Unless you have any more questions for me?"
"I do actually. I, uh, I just found out that I'm technically still married. Something about me not signing the divorce papers even though I specifically remember signing them? And, before you ask, me and this girl served together, we were both twenty-one, going through rough patches and it was a Vegas wedding eight years ago. Lasted no more than twenty-four hours."
"It's really good that you told me this because any good lawyer would find that out when you file for guardianship. It's possible that she didn't co-sign the divorce papers. If that's the reason, I can help you draw up new divorce papers right now."
"Really? You'd help me with that?"
"Of course. A friend of Antonio's is a friend of mine," Stone said as he started typing on his computer. "So, what you can do is you can file for a no-fault divorce."
"You're gonna have to be specific, Stone. I know a bit of criminal law because I've had to testify in criminal cases, but like I said, I don't know family or civil law," Jay said.
"What a no-fault divorce is, Jay, is that you don't have to prove that either of you did anything wrong to get a divorce. All you have to do is state that your marriage is unsalvageable and continue filing for divorce."
"That's it? What if she doesn't sign it?"
"The divorce papers will be served to, uh...what's this girl's name again?" Stone asked.
"Abby."
"Abby. The divorce papers will be served to Abby and she has twenty days to file her response with the court. If she doesn't, then the court rules it as an uncontested divorce and then you're officially divorced."
"Me and Abby are meeting up to talk about all this tonight. But, can we just fill out paperwork for this no-fault divorce just in case things don't go as planned? I just really need to get guardianship of Y/N. The least amount of problems, the better."
"Of course. And if everything goes well with her tonight, then just give me a call and I'll shred the documents."
"Alright, just tell me where to sign."
***
"Wilson is running through the showers wearing nothing but a Kevlar vest, right?" Jay reminisced on the good parts of his Ranger days with Abby at a bar around 8:30 that night after his meeting with Peter Stone.
"Well, the lieutenant said, all outdoor activities to be conducted in body armor." Jay laughed at Abby's rendition of their lieutenant's voice. "Do you remember, he had his girlfriend's name tattooed on his ass?"
Jay set his empty drink down on the bar. "Did he tell you that was his girlfriend? That was his dog's name," Jay laughed.
"That actually makes more sense," Abby said. "I could go for another one of these."
"I, um, I shouldn't."
"Gotta get back to the barracks?"
"No, I uh gotta get back to my little sister, actually. I'm looking after her at the moment. It's a long story. Do you have the papers?"
"I, uh, I don't have them."
"Abby."
"It's just, I never told you. Even that crazy day we got married, I never told you that I loved you, Jay. It didn't feel right. But, I loved you, Jay. I do love you."
Jay sighed. "Abby, you deserve everything good. I'm just not the guy that's gonna give that to you." He brushed her hair to the side and gave her a kiss on the cheek.
After putting some money on the bar to pay for the drinks and tip the bartender, he left the bar. Guess he was going to need these no-fault divorce documents, anyway.
He was almost to his car when he heard someone calling his name. And, it was a voice he knew all too well.
"Erin?" he shouted as she came closer. "What are you doing here?"
"Would it kill you to turn on your phone? You need to get to the district. Now."
"What? Why? What's wrong?"
She got in his passenger seat. "Just drive. I'll explain on the way."
***
You were sitting on Jay's bed reading a book when you heard a knock on the door.
Slowly, you got off his bed and made your way out of his room. You took a knife out of the knife block, but you hoped you wouldn't need to use it. Jay would've told you if someone was planning on stopping over. And, if it was Will, he would've given you a heads-up.
The knocking got louder and more aggressive. "Jayson! Open this door! I have the right to see my daughter!"
Dad.
With the knife still in hand, you backed up and then, once on the carpet, ran back into Jay's room and quietly shut the door and locked it. You pulled out your phone and tried Jay. It went straight to voicemail. The pounding was getting louder. You tried Will. It went straight to voicemail because he was on shift. You thought you heard your dad starting to kick the door now instead of just pounding on it with his fists. You tried the last person you thought could help.
"Y/N?" Erin asked as she answered her phone and paused the tv show she was watching.
"Erin," you whispered. "I'm scared. I need help."
"You need help? Can you tell me why?"
"My dad, he's- he's here. He's looking for me." You heard a crash.
"Jay? Y/N? I know one of you is in here!"
"I- I think he just broke down the apartment door. Please help."
"Okay, okay, here's what you're going to do. I want you to hide somewhere and I'm going to call a patrol car over there right now. You're going to turn your phone on silent and I'm going to call you right back," she told you.
"Okay," you whispered as quietly as you could.
"I'll call you back in one minute tops."
You moved as quietly as you could with the knife and your phone still in your hands and opened Jay's closet door. You buried yourself behind the two garment bags that contained Jay's police blues and his military dress uniform, hoping against hope that your dad wouldn't find you.
Your phone lit up and it was Erin. You answered.
"Y/N, the officers will be there soon. I don't want you to talk. Just know that I'm on the phone with you."
At the same time, as she was talking to you over speakerphone, she was texting the team. She assumed you couldn't reach Jay or Will since you had called her. She told them what was happening and that a few of them needed to get to the district because they needed to find Jay's location. She also told Voight to get ahold of Sharon Goodwin so she could notify Will of what was currently happening.
"Chicago PD! Put your hands where we can see them!" you heard from your hiding place.
"See?" Erin said. "I told you that you'd be okay. I told them that you were hiding, so if someone opens the door, it's just an officer."
Just after she said that the closet door opened.
You squeaked.
"It's okay. You're safe," the officer said. "We're just going to take you down to the district. You're safe."
You peeked out from your hiding place and you saw the blues of the officers. You slowly made your way out and followed the officer out to the patrol car, the one that didn't house your dad for a breaking and entering charge at the moment.
***
"Where is she?" Jay yelled as he entered the district.
Platt just pointed to the bench next to one of the offices where you were sitting, staring at the floor, with a police jacket draped over your shoulders.
He sunk to his knees in front of you. "Are you hurt? Did Dad hurt you? Did he put his hands on you in any way?"
You shook your head.
"Oh thank God."
"I was so scared," you whispered. "When you and Will didn't answer, I thought he was gonna get me."
"I'm sorry. I turned off my phone when I talked to ASA Stone, and I forgot to turn it back on. I'm so sorry. C'mere."
You all but fell off the bench and into Jay's arms. "Is he going to jail? I don't want him going to jail."
"He was drunk out of his mind. I can ask not to press charges, though."
"Please. He needs help."
Although Jay didn't say it, he knew you were right. Jails and prisons didn't rehabilitate, they just taught criminals how to be better criminals. He knew that his dad needed rehab, a twelve-step program, anything.
"Okay, I won't press charges. But, I think we're gonna need to stay with Will for the night because our door's broken. What do you say we run home and grab some clothes to bring to Will's? And, since Dad will be here for a little longer, we can run to his house and get more of your stuff. Sound like a plan?"
"Can we get Dairy Queen on the way to Will's?"
"We sure can."
***
"I- I don't think any of these dresses will fit me anymore. They look way too big," you said to Jay as the two of you unpacked a bunch of your stuff in the guest room of Jay's new apartment. You wanted to think of it as the guest room for now instead of calling it your room just in case Jay wasn't awarded guardianship. You didn't want to get too attached.
Jay sighed. He figured you were right. He would see if Erin could take you, but their relationship was on the backburner right now. And, Erin had some stuff with Bunny she had to work out after she had brought her that pearl bracelet and said that she might be leaving Chicago. So, now wasn't really the right time for him to be bugging Erin about going shopping with you. And, he couldn't ask Kim because she was taking some furlough after finding her sister brutally sodomized after a night out.
He thought about asking Will if Nina could come, but he didn't think that those two were too happy with each other at the moment since Will hadn't told Nina about their dad being in the hospital and she had to find out from Natalie. Not Will's greatest moment.
He racked his brain for more women he knew.
Then it hit him: Gabby.
Yes, they had briefly dated, but that was five years ago. She was married now and his feelings for her were completely gone. They were civil with each other when they saw each other in the field and would chat when Gabby showed up at the district to pick up Eva or Diego.
"How about you try a few on after we finish unpacking, and then if none of them really fit, I can give Gabby a call and see if she'll take you shopping while I work on unpacking the rest of the house," Jay suggested.
"Okay. Will's gonna be over after his shift to help though, right?" you asked.
"He better be. He said he would. If he doesn't come, he better have a really good excuse."
"You can't unpack the kitchen without me," you told him.
"Why not?"
"I can't have you putting the glasses and other stuff on high shelves because I wanna reach them without having to climb on the counter."
"Okay, fine. I'll keep your short little height in mind while I unpack." He paused. "Do you want to get those fancy word stickers for your room for one of the walls?"
"Decals? And, it's not my room yet."
"Listen, after that stunt Dad pulled at my old apartment, Stone is 99.9% positive that I'll be granted guardianship. We just have to jump through all the hoops first."
"Like the home checks?"
"Like the home checks," he confirmed.
"What do I say in court?" you asked a few minutes later as you were putting the pillows on your freshly made bed.
"You just tell the truth," he answered.
"Will you be in there with me?"
"No, I won't. Stone said that usually in these cases you talk to the judge by yourself so that you can't be intimidated by either of the people who are fighting for custody or guardianship."
"So you won't be there? Will won't be there?"
"Will will be out in the hall and I will be in a different room. I'll be in like a witness room, where they make witnesses of a crime wait so that their testimony isn't swayed by what the other people are saying on the stand. But, me and Dad will be in the courtroom at the same time, just so I can see what he'll be saying."
"And, I'll be in there then, too?"
"Yes."
"What kind of questions do they ask me?"
"Stone said that since you're older, you get a say in who you stay with, so they'll ask you questions like who've you known the longest, who you feel safest with, who you want to live with, etc."
"Will they ask me questions about Dad? Like how he didn't give me food and how he broke into your apartment?" you asked.
"They will," Jay confirmed. "But, Stone will be in there for those questions just in case he needs to object to something."
"So the only time I'll be alone with the judge is when they're asking me the first few questions? Like who I feel safest with?"
"Exactly. Now, do you need help putting these books on the top shelf of your bookshelf?"
***
"Hey, how was your day?" Jay asked as he came home from work that afternoon. It was a shock that he was home by 5 pm, but you had a big day tomorrow. Not only was tomorrow Friday, it was the day you and Jay had to go to court to see if he would be awarded guardianship of you.
"We've got a problem," you stated.
"Um, I can try to help you with it, but let me go put my gun away first."
While he was doing that, you pulled out the slip of paper and the note that Gretchen Cunningham had written, saying that she wouldn't allow you to make up the test you would be missing because you had to go to court.
"Alright, what's the problem?" Jay asked as he walked into the kitchen.
"Cunningham. She's the problem...as always."
You handed him the papers and he read them over. "Yeah, this isn't going to fly. She doesn't need a judge's signature to allow you to take the test. I'll talk to the school tomorrow morning when I call to tell them you'll be absent."
"I hate her," you groaned. "She's so mean. And, I know what you're gonna say. You have to deal with people you don't like. But, she lost one of my assignments and told me I didn't turn it in and couldn't re-do it!"
"Well did you?" Jay asked. "Turn it in, I mean."
"Jay!"
He put his hands up in a sign of surrender. "I'm just saying, could be your fault."
"Yes, I turned in the stupid assignment. And, she paired me up with the stupidest kid in the class and told me to do well on this assignment because he needed a good grade to pass. It's not my fault he's failing! Don't put his grade on me, lady!"
"And she wouldn't let you re-do it?"
"Nope. But it's fine. I'm still getting an A. That might change if she doesn't let me take this test, though."
"It's like deja-vu from my freshman year all over again. Why doesn't she retire already? She's like 100."
"Or they could fire her," you quipped. "Or I could switch classes."
"I'll see what I can do. Who's the other history teacher?"
"Um, Miss Hedge."
"Hedge? As in Jayne Hedge?"
"Yeah, it's actually her. Why? Do you know her?"
"Yes he does," Will said as he entered Jay's apartment. "In fact, they went to freshman snowcoming together."
"How did you even get in here?" Jay asked, turning around to look at his older brother.
"For a cop, you're not that smart. You didn't lock the door behind you."
"I don't lock my door when I'm still awake. And, seriously? You just had to tell Y/N that, didn't you?"
"You guys can't just leave me hanging now. Tell me the story!"
"Fine," Jay grumbled and Will just laughed and sat down at the table, too. "I met her at school, obviously. She was on the freshman basketball team and I had winter weight training for the soccer team. I thought she was pretty and she was really smart, too. And, I knew that a bunch of the girls went to get Taco Bell after practice, so me and some of my friends decided to go, too."
"There used to be a Taco Bell close to school?" you asked. If there was, you'd never seen it before.
"It got torn down just after I graduated," Jay answered. "Anyway, we went to Taco Bell and I started talking to her and we talked a lot after practice. I'd walk her home sometimes. Then, I asked her to snowcoming and she said yes."
"So, why'd you guys break up? I know you dated Allie in high school."
"We realized we were better off as friends." Jay shrugged.
"And he realized he liked Allie more," Will added.
"Yeah, that too."
Will set a big bag of takeout on the table.
"Seriously?" Jay asked. "I thought we weren't going to do this that much anymore so we can get Y/N's vitamin and mineral levels stabilized."
"I'm sure she'd appreciate the break from your mundane meals," Will said. "And, I got us all side salads to go with the burgers instead of fries, so calm down." Jay gave him a look. "Fine, I got the side salads along with the fries. But, they're made out of potatoes, so they're technically a vegetable."
"For a doctor, you don't know much about nutrition, do you? And, my meals are not mundane."
"Dude, you'd have chicken, spaghetti, or grilled cheese every night."
"Not every night, just a lot of nights when I'd get home from the district late. I'll have you know me and Y/N have been making really good diners lately. Wanna tell Will what we made last night for dinner, Short Stack?"
"We made this really good pasta. We used Orzo, which looks like rice, but it's pasta. And we made a sauce out of tomatoes, onions, and orange juice. It was supposed to be lemon juice, but Jay didn't have any. We put chicken sausage in it for protein...and spices of course," you told Will.
"That actually sounds really good. Wow, Jay cooking every night, not something I expected."
"I like it," you said. "And, he lets me play whatever music I want when we cook."
Will rolled his eyes. You had Jay so wrapped around your finger that he'd do almost anything for you. Will didn't think he himself was that bad, but deep down, he knew he'd do anything for you, too...despite not being in Chicago as long as Jay had been.
***
"So I got a call from Stone this morning," Jay said around 11:30 that night when he and Will were sitting on the couch, each nursing a beer.
Will set his beer down on the coffee table in front of him. "And?"
"And, as of yesterday at midnight, I am officially divorced from Abby. Turns out, they served her the papers and, since she didn't sign them and it had been twenty days, it turned into an uncontested, no-fault divorce."
"Congrats, man. Might've been eight years too late, but you're a free man now."
"Amen to that. And it came at just the right time."
"Yeah," Will agreed. "You nervous for tomorrow?"
"Not really. More nervous for Y/N than anything. I've testified in criminal cases, so I kinda know how this goes, but she hasn't. And, before me and Dad go in to plead our cases, she has to talk to the judge all by herself. I just wish one of us could be in there with her."
Will nodded. "Know what they're going to ask you?"
"I know what Stone's going to ask me because we prepped, but I have no idea what Dad's lawyer is going to ask me. Pretty sure he's got just a public defender, though. Hopefully, that works in my favor."
"Not always, man," Will disagreed. "The public defenders who do these cases only do these cases. They've had a lot of practice."
"You really know how to make me feel better, thanks," Jay replied sarcastically.
"Rather have you hear it from me before the case than someone else after. Are you going to get cross-examined?"
"Probably. Don't know what they're going to ask me though because it's a cross. Stone set up some sample questions for me to answer with him to practice, but I'm going in blind. I'm used to it though because I've testified before. But, this feels like my biggest case."
"Because it probably is."
"Are you talking about tomorrow?" you asked as you quietly padded across the floor towards the living room.
"Y/N? What are you doing up? It's almost midnight," Jay pointed out.
"I- I know. But I couldn't sleep. I'm scared. What if I have to go back to Dad's? What if they find neither of you fit and I have to go into foster care?"
Jay patted the empty spot on the couch next to him and you sat down. "We just have to trust the system. That's all we can do."
"I know, but I can't sleep. And I'm so tired."
"I have an idea," Jay started and stood up, "stay here."
"I'm gonna go look for some melatonin," Will said after a few minutes of you two just sitting in silence. "I think Jay still has some for nights that he can't sleep."
Will was still rummaging around Jay's cabinets when Jay came back with a big black box with some cords and a cardboard box balanced against his hip.
"The hell is that?" You quickly covered your mouth when you realized you had sworn. "Sorry."
"It's okay. And, to answer your question, this is VCR. And, I have a bunch of videotapes in this box." He turned from you to face the kitchen, where Will was still opening and closing cabinets. "Will? What are you doing?"
"Looking for melatonin for Y/N. You got any?"
"First of all, it's so late that if you give it to her now, she'll sleep through her alarm and we can't be late for court tomorrow. And, second of all, I keep it in the medicine cabinet in my bathroom."
Will closed the cabinet and made his way back to the couch to sit next to you as Jay started to hook up the VCR to the tv. "Uh, Jay," Will began, "you know it's a little late for a movie right? And, I should get going in like half an hour?"
"We're not watching a movie. I recorded a bunch of the Blackhawks playoff games on one of these and I thought Y/N'd like to watch the 2010 Stanely Cup final series against the Flyers. Or, we could watch the final series against the Bruins when they won the cup last year."
"Let's watch the 2010 one," you said. "I don't think I watched it because I wasn't into watching hockey as much as I am now."
"And you have Jay to thank for that," Will pointed out.
"You can record things on there? Like an old-school DVR?" you asked.
"God, now I feel old," Will groaned. "Wait until she learns about floppy disks."
"Floppy what now?"
"Nevermind. Only 80s-90s kids would get it."
"We get it. You guys are millennials."
"Got it!" Jay exclaimed as he popped the videotape into the VCR and it started playing. "Now, shut up so we can relive this, Will."
You fell asleep before you even reached the end of the first period.
***
You rubbed your eyes and then looked around you to notice that you were still on the couch. You craned your neck to see the time on the oven on the other side of the open concept kitchen and living room and saw that it was 5:45 am. Jay was at the gym now. And, you knew you wouldn't be able to fall back asleep because you were already starting to worry about the rest of the day. You had to be in court at 8:30 and had to be talking to a judge at 9:00, the judge that would determine who you would be living with, which would inevitably determine your future.
God, you were thinking just like the teachers talked about the SATs, how if you didn't get a good grade on that standardized test that your future would be ruined.
You stood up and stretched and then went back to your room to grab the book you were currently reading. Then, you turned on a few lamps and grabbed a yogurt and fruit from the fridge, along with a glass of orange juice. After wrapping yourself in a blanket, you started to eat and read, hoping that that would keep your mind from wandering and worrying at least until Jay got back from the gym.
Half an hour later, Jay unlocked the apartment door and walked inside, confused as to why you were awake. It was only 6:15 and he had told you just to be up by 6:45.
"What are you doing awake, Short Stack?" he asked as he grabbed a banana from the bowl on the counter.
"I woke up at about 5:45 and I couldn't fall asleep. I'm sorry."
"Nothing to worry about. I just want you as well-rested for today as possible. You have your dress all ready? Know what shoes you're going to wear?"
"Jay," you whined. "I picked all of that out last night because you told me to."
"Just didn't want you to have to rush. I can turn the game back on for you so you can watch it until you have to start getting ready?"
You nodded and Jay came over and fiddled with the tv and the remote, going back to the middle of the first period where he thought you had fallen asleep.
"Okay, I'm gonna take a shower. Will said he'll be here around 7:45. Oh, and you can take that history test when you get back on Monday, in Miss Hedge's class."
You smiled. "Okay." Then, you turned your attention back to the hockey game.
***
You widened your eyes as you stood in the second bathroom getting ready. You had gotten dressed (into a navy blue, lacey dress that ended just above the knee that you had bought with Gabby a few days ago), washed your face, brushed your teeth, did your makeup, but now you were cursing yourself for being so stupid. You had no way of doing your hair. You didn't have a straightener here. And, your typical ponytail or bun wasn't going to cut it for court.
"Jay!" you yelled as you exited the bathroom and knocked on his bedroom door.
He opened it as he was tying his tie. "Yeah? Everything okay?"
"I don't have a straightener! I can't do my hair and if I wear my hair like I usually do then it will look bad on you and--"
"Hey, hey, calm down. We've still got over 45 minutes before we have to leave. I'll give Gabby a call and see if she's not on shift and can let you borrow hers."
You sighed the biggest sigh of relief. "Thank you."
Five minutes later, Jay knocked on the bathroom door as you were brushing your hair. "Gabby will be here in ten."
"Oh thank God."
***
"Thank you!" you exclaimed ten minutes later as you opened the door, revealing Gabby with her hair straightener. And, behind her, was Casey.
"No problem. Just tell me if you're not used to it and need help."
You took it from her. "No, I should be good. Thanks, though. C'mon in. I'm pretty sure Jay's around here somewhere."
They came into the apartment while you ran off to find Jay.
You knocked on his bedroom once more and he opened it, this time completely ready for the day. "Gabby and Casey are here," you told him.
"Casey's here?" he asked, furrowing his eyebrows.
"Yeah. I think he just came with Gabby."
"Okay. Go fix your hair. I'll go talk to them."
Twenty minutes later, you were finished and slipping your shoes on when you heard a knock on the apartment door. "I got it, Y/N!" Jay yelled.
Well, I hoped you would because you're closer to the door than me, you thought to yourself.
Jay opened the door, and since it was exactly 7:45, he was expecting to just see Will. But, what he saw both shocked him and made him want to cry from appreciation at the same time.
Standing next to Will was Natalie and behind them was all of Intelligence and Trudy Platt and Mouch, all of Squad 3 and Truck 81 (minus Casey because he was inside), Sylvie Brett, Chief Boden, April, Maggie, Dr. Rhodes, Dr. Charles, Reese, and Noah.
"You're all here for the court case?" Jay asked, stunned.
"Well, Natalie has to testify about Y/N's deficiencies and weight loss, but yeah. It's better if the court sees that the person trying to get guardianship has a ton of support. So, I figured I'd call in reinforcements...even though I'm pretty sure my big personality is enough."
Jay rolled his eyes. "Your big ego maybe." He paused, not knowing how he was going to fit everyone in his apartment even if it was bigger than his last one. "However many of you guys can fit inside, can come in. Um, some of you might just need to meet us at the courthouse--"
"Jay, they just came now so you could see how many people were behind you. They're just gonna meet you there. Except for me. I'm driving you two." Jay furrowed his eyebrows. They didn't talk about this. "I'll explain later."
"Gabby," you said as you walked out of the bathroom. "Can you--" you stopped as you saw everyone outside Jay's apartment.
"They're all here for you and Jay," Gabby explained as she stood up. "And, you can't cry because it'll smear your makeup, so hold back the tears."
You nodded as you held them back. "Can you, uh, check the back of my hair to make sure I got it all straight?" you asked.
"Two spots are still a bit wavy. Let's go fix it so you can get going."
A few minutes later, Gabby had fixed your hair and everyone besides Will and Jay had left and were on their way to the courthouse. You slipped on a pair of black ballet flats and your coat.
Will had explained that the reason he was driving was that if Jay didn't get guardianship, he didn't want him driving in such a distressed state. Will had worked on so many patients who were in car accidents due to their emotional state and he didn't want Jay to be one of them.
"Ready?" Jay asked you.
"As ready as I'll ever be," you said as you wiped your sweaty palms on your dress.
"All you have to do is tell the truth."
***
You thought you'd be comfortable inside a courtroom because of the crime dramas you'd seen. But, standing inside one was very different from watching a fictional tv show.
No one but you, the judge, the court reporter, Peter Stone, and your dad's lawyer could be in the room for this next part, so everyone was either in a witness room or waiting outside in the hallway for the go-ahead to be let in. You would be allowed to be in the courtroom while they were talking to Jay and your dad, but they wouldn't be able to be in the room when you talked to the judge...for obvious reasons, such as influencing what you would say.
"All rise."
You stood up next to Stone as the judge, who you now knew as Judge Callahan, entered the room.
Once you sat down, you were called to the stand. "Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth so help you God?" you were asked as you placed your hand on the Bible.
"I do," you answered.
"Alright, please allow Miss Halstead on the witness stand," Judge Callahan said. "Now, I'm just going to ask you a few questions. All you have to do is answer them. Do you understand?"
"Yes, I understand."
"Okay, first question: Has your father, Pat Halstead, ever hit you or physically abused you in any way?"
"No," you answered.
"Has he ever neglected to give you necessities, such as food, water, clothing, or shelter?"
"Yes."
"Can you please elaborate?"
You did. You explained how your dad never had food in the house and would yell at you and call you a burden if you tried to eat his leftovers.
"Is it true that your father tried to break into your brother's house to get you?" Judge Callahan asked.
"Yes."
"Who do you feel safest with?"
"My brother, Jay Halstead."
"Who would you prefer to live with?"
"Jay Halstead."
***
Jay sat on the witness stand. He had answered all of Stone's questions, including all of the questions about him finding you stealing, what you had been using for pads, and what he had been told that you had been eating at your dad's house. Natalie had testified about your physical well-being, weight loss, and iron and riboflavin deficiencies. But now, it was time for Jay's cross-examination. And, he sure as hell didn't expect this next question to be asked.
"Mr. Halstead," your dad's lawyer began, "you previously said, and I quote, that your dad clocked out on parenting you and your older brother, Will, when you were in your teens, around when you started high school. Can you elaborate on that?"
"Objection!" Stone yelled. "Relevance?"
"Speaks to a pattern."
"I'll allow it," Judge Callahan said. "Please answer the question, Mr. Halstead."
Jay nodded. "He clocked out on parenting me and Will because he said that were essentially grown men at this point in our lives, we didn't need him cheering us on or him helping us. He didn't come to a single one of my soccer games in high school. And, if by some miracle we went out for ice cream or something just me, my brother, and my dad, he wouldn't pay for ours. Said we were old enough to pay for ourselves.
"But, we had our mom. She came to all our games and school events. She made us breakfast, lunch, and dinner. If she wasn't there, I don't know what would've happened to me and Will. My dad didn't even want me to go into the military and didn't want Will to go to medical school. He said a real man went right to work. The only time I felt loved by him in all my teenage years was when I left for the military. It was like because he knew I might die over there that he figured he'd say he loved me one last time."
"Redirect, your honor," Stone said. Judge Callahan nodded at Stone. "You said that your mom made you and your brother lunch. Are you doing that for Y/N?"
"Objection! Relevance?"
"Speaks to Mr. Halstead's abilities as a parent."
"I'll allow it. Please answer the question."
"I actually do," Jay answered. "I make her a packed lunch to bring to school every day and I'm sure to add foods high in iron and riboflavin to help those levels stabilize quicker. The first time I packed her a lunch, she actually cried because she hadn't gotten a lunch from home in so long."
"Thank you."
"Mr. Halstead," your dad's lawyer started, "you were previously deployed overseas in Afghanistan for two tours of duty. While I thank you for your service, is it possible that you could have PTSD and hurt Y/N in the middle of the night?"
"I would never hurt her!"
"While you are fully conscious, maybe. But, while you are in a sleep-addled state, isn't it possible that you might think that the person waking you up is an enemy soldier and not your little sister?"
Jay sighed. No one knew this about him, not you, not Will, not his dad. No one. And now all of his family and closest friends were going to know since they were in the courtroom watching this entire thing unfold.
"I am on Prazosin for nightmares caused by my PTSD," Jay answered.
"And how long have you been on this medication?"
"For about two years."
"And this has helped you manage your nightmares?"
"Yes, very much so."
"No further questions."
***
"Jesus, Jay," Will said after you had watched your dad's testimony on why he should get to keep you. It was the usual: how he was your father, so, therefore, he deserved to keep taking care of you and it's what your mother would've wanted...despite her telling Jay to keep you safe before she died. They already had the responding officers testify about the break-in, so he couldn't deny that and he was under oath, so if anyone found out he lied, then your dad would be held in contempt.
"I'm sorry I never told you, man," Jay said. "I just, I thought of it as weak that I couldn't deal with my own shit." He grimaced when he realized he had sworn around you. "Sorry, Y/N."
"It's okay. I hear that stuff at school."
"I'm just upset you didn't tell me they were getting that bad, Jay," Will lamented. "I know I wasn't there for you a lot after Mom died, but I'm here now."
Jay nodded, and Will knew he didn't want to talk about the topic anymore. You looked through the little window into the courtroom and saw that the judge was coming back from her chambers.
"Guys, I think she's made a decision," you said nervously.
"Whatever happens, me and Jay will be there for you," Will promised.
All you could do at this point was nod, as a lump was forming in your throat from all your nerves.
Jay led you back into the courtroom and you sat at the front, between Jay and Will. You wiped your sweaty palms on your dress and Jay gave your shoulder a reassuring squeeze.
Judge Callahan stood up.
"By using the child's best interest standard of who can provide food, clothing, housing, education, medical care, and a stable home life for Y/N Halstead, I declare Mr. Jay Halstead the legal guardian of Y/N Halstead."
You could've sworn that you stopped breathing the second she said Jay's first name. You were so overwhelmed that you just turned to him and started crying as he wrapped an arm around you while he listened to the judge state your dad's visitation rights.
But, you didn't hear any of that. The only phrase that kept repeating in your head was I declare Mr. Jay Halstead the legal guardian of Y/N Halstead over and over again.
Now, you knew that you'd always have the necessities when you lived with Jay. You wouldn't have to worry about where your next meal was going to come from or if your dad would be out until 3 am drinking. You wouldn't have to worry about having access to tampons or pads and not be embarrassed anymore to ask for some from school if you forgot to put any in your backpack that day. But most of all, you knew that you would be loved and cared for.
A/N: Thank you so much for reading! Did I make anyone cry with this one??? The blood draw scenario was actually based on when I had to go and get my blood drawn the other day and thought I was going to pass out, which is why that scene was so long. Anyway, thank you again for reading, and please reblog/like and comment and tell me what you think! As always, if you want to be added to my taglist, just tell me and I’ll add you!
taglist: @theambracer88 @virtualreader @kelelas-life @celyndavies @brookerz122493 @musicismyescape27 @anotherfan07 @thexplosivegirl @dreamingwithlens @xoxmariaxox @onechicago18 @iamasimpingh0e
#jay halstead#will halstead#jay halstead imagine#jay halstead fanfic#jay halstead fanfiction#will halstead imagine#will halstead fanfic#will halstead fanfiction#chicago pd imagine#chicago pd#chicago med#chicago med imagine#chicago med fanfic#chicago med fanfiction#chicago pd fanfic#chicago pd fanfiction#halstead bros#halstead brothers#halstead sister#halstead sister imagine#writer#writing#fanfic#fanfiction#imagine#my writing
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T-Minus
Is the hotel nice? Well… it’s enough, anyway. There’s no microwave in the room—a major oversight on my part—but there’s one in the lobby I can use, next to an array of snacks that are only moderately overpriced, considering. We’re less than half a mile from our daily destination, and even closer to a CVS that sells the medicine I forgot to pack. On the other hand, that CVS offers no bottled water to accompany the dose: instead, their nearly-barren drinks cooler sports a yellow sign reading, “NEEDS REPAIR DO NOT RESTOCK SELL THROUGH INVENTORY,” even though it’s apparent the task can never be accomplished because some of that inventory has been trapped inside a massive slag of ice flowing off the back wall. It’s clearly been a problem for a while.
But the middle-groundness of the hotel and its environs are actually a perfect fit for this little non-vacation I’m on. You see, my son is attending a three-day program for teens at NASA, and I am his chauffeur. The daddy-daughter bonding is in full swing back in Austin, and there are precisely zero responsibilities hanging over me between the hours of 7:30 am and 4:00 pm. It’s a freedom that, like the hotel, sounds mundane, but suits my current needs better than I could hope for. I haven’t been really alone since… well, it depends on how we’re measuring. In one sense, it’s been a little over a year, since the 2020 Spring Break that never ended. But in another, more philosophical sense, it’s been 15 years as of this morning, when my son’s birthday trip to NASA turns literal for a day.
The fact that we have just three years left with him is not especially disturbing; much moreso is the fact that his little sister has just turned 13, meaning we have only five years left with any children at all. And who, then, will I be? Because while it sucks to admit, I have in many ways forgotten. Faced with three days alone in a mediocre city, I wasn’t bereft of ideas on how to spend my time, but I did struggle to judge their relative value, as a person with long-dormant tastes and opinions. Did I want to go to a museum, or make a few dents in my decade-and-a-half nap deficit, or just stare at the wall and revel in the fucking silence? This past year has been tough, but the truth is that other years have been tougher, and absolutely none of them have been easy since I blindly started this project of creating humans.
To be clear, I don’t regret having kids—or perhaps I do, but I would also regret not having them? I’m generally a person who regrets missing out on any experience, good or bad. But recently, I’ve been replaying an old memory from my wedding day, some 18-ish years ago. In the midst of the festivities, I found myself seated between my new mother-in-law and the mother of the best man, who had known each other for exactly as long as my husband and his friend had. I mentioned my fondness for big families, and my desire to have four children.
“Oh, don’t do that,” my mother-in-law said.
“No, definitely don’t do that,” said the best man’s mother, at almost exactly the same time.
I laughed; they didn’t. “I’m sitting here between two women who both had four children themselves!” I pointed out, still thinking this was one of those Exasperated Chic, wine-o’-clock throw pillow kind of conversations.
“Yes,” they agreed. “That’s right.” Absolute deadpan.
And yet, because I’m me—or because I was who I was then, who may or may not be who I am now, because who even knows—I took it as a sort of challenge, as if they were implying that I wasn’t capable of pulling off the same feat they had. I really, truly, didn’t understand it for the clear warning it was until years later. And the Catch-22 is they couldn’t say it to either of their own daughters, just like my mother couldn’t say it to me, even though I’m confident she’d go back and live her life differently given half a chance. You can’t tell your own kids that having kids is a bad idea. You also can’t tell your nonexistent kids that not having kids is a bad idea. We’re all stuck advising strangers who aren’t inclined to take our word for it.
My gut feeling is that the “having kids” side of things still comes out ahead, because the bulk of the obligation does end eventually, and you get to go back to living only for yourself. Mark one down for having your cake and eating it, too. The question is, are you able to? Do you buy into society’s lie that everything good happens in your twenties and thirties, and spend the rest of your life wallowing in missed opportunities? Or do you perhaps see the myriad self-reinventions the world offers, only to discover that you no longer remember how to be someone at all?
Anyway, I decided not to make a plan, and just see where the three days took me. It’s not who I used to be—childless Jennifer was a planner, through and through—but I found, at least, that I could trust in being satisfied with what I chose, even if it was nothing. It turns out I do still have the ability to be myself, I just can’t predict in advance who that person is going to be. I was open to finding out.
So I went to Bed Bath & Beyond—because I’m a person who is picky about their pillows, but too embarrassed to travel with their own. I’m a person who goes out and solves a problem quickly and efficiently, and who is absolutely not too embarrassed to walk through a hotel lobby carrying what is obviously a just-purchased replacement for their shoddy offerings.
I washed my car at one of those fancy places with the vacuum tubes and interior wipes—because I’m a person who likes things to be clean, and who judges other people when their car floors are filthy even though mine have been for over a decade. I’m a person who prefers to keep things clean in the first place, and resents cleaning up after others so much that I usually just end up leaving it. But I’m also person who doesn’t mind getting down and scrubbing when I know that it will stay clean (for at least two more days, anyway.)
I had a big plate of Tex-Mex. That one wasn’t a revelation, to be honest—if there’s one facet of my personality that has survived parenthood, it’s a willingness to indulge in Tex-Mex at every opportunity. I also ate an entire box of Rice Krispie Treats over the course of the weekend.
I watched a bunch of TV shows and movies that my family would find uninteresting, and when my son got back in the evening, I watched one of them again—because I wanted to, and he didn’t know I’d already watched it just hours earlier.
And, I wrote this. Because thankfully, it turns out I’m still a person who writes for her own fulfillment, not just as a means of escape. And when the real escape comes in a few years, I now know at least a few of the things that will be waiting for me on the other side.
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These Four Walls And Me - Dick Grayson Imagine
Pairing: Dick Grayson x Reader
Summary: Dick, all titans and the reader went to a hard mission against the Joker. Something’s wrong and Dick dies, but is he really dead?
Warnings: Cursing, mention of smut, fights. *Y/S/H/N: your superhero name* *Italic means memories*
Credits: Thank you, @incorrect-titans-quotes for always helping me. i’d give up on this if it wasnt u.
Today is D day. The day we will finally do what we’ve been planning everyday for one month. To stop the Joker. Dick has done his best to the team, we train everyday with blinded eyes for hours. Because anything can be taken from you in a battle. I forgot to say that Dick Grayson is also my 4 years boyfriend, i may be suspect to talk about him as a hero and as a lover, after all..everything he does is pretty well done, so if there’s something we are in this moment is ready to catch this fucking crazy villain.
[4 PM. Titans Tower, Training room]
This was our last training, i had Dick watching us and Jason against me right now and it’s not easy, after all, the three of us had been trained by Batman himself. Me and jayson had our sticks so we could practice defence, no attacking. Blinded, i could feel Jason’s breath behind and when i feel the closeness of his stick, i hit it with mine
“Are you asleep, Jaybird?” I mock him
“Wait and see, Y/N”
“Be mad, Jason, but defend yourself, concentrate” Dick said in his particular tone.
Attack followed by defence, the training kept going. Every move was necessary. When both of us had properly trained, we followed to the living room, where we met the rest of the Titans. Dick wanted to reunite us so he could talk about tonight.
“I believe all of you are fully ready to this. But it’s a dangerous mission and i need to ask you all, one more time to be concentrated in this. Be fast, be confident, we are in a bigger number but it doesn’t mean he has no ace up his sleeve. After all, he’s the joker.” Dick has concern lacing his voice as he tried to make them all understand it wouldn’t be easy.
We had already fought agains many villains, but this one really had got us in alert. The fact is: Joker is a psychopath, nothing satisfies him more than provoking his targets, whether through chaos, fear, delirium. He’s been here in San Francisco, but this is our place, and he won’t mess it up.
“We can do that, we know the old train station, we rule here in San Francisco so i believe we have advantage” Kory said
“Yes, we will do that in the most titan’s style, this is what we do, guys!” Gar said with his notorious excitement.
“Be careful, smart and lithe. We’ve seen things the rest of you can’t imagine, when in Gotham, I don’t want it to happen here.”
“Don’t worry, Y/N, we’ll do our best.” Rachel says and hugs me. Since she came in, since the start, Dick had done everything to protect her and i may have got into this with him, because i see her as my own child.
We are a Family, every one of us complete our team, so that’s why 1 month of insane training. We are ready.
[ 10 p.m, Dick and Y/N’s bedroom]
“We will stop him, won’t we?” Dick asks while we were cuddling in bed, we took our bath and we were relaxing right now but something doesn’t seem okay, my black-and-blue Bird doesn’t seem that confident as he Always do.
“We will, love, because we strive for that. You’re our mentor, Dick and you’ve done everything so we could be hundred porcent compatible to him in this mission. Don’t worry that much. You, by yourself would detain him, i blindly believe it.” I tell him, filling him with kissies over all his face.
“Okay, okay, baby, i’ll relax, we’ll be lying here after that and we’ll make love like there’s no other day on Earth.” He says in my ear, I wish we didn’t have a mission to lead.
“You’re such a perv, Dick Grayson” I mock him and he starst tickling me.
“You make me, Y/N” and we kiss.
“I love you, D.” I tell him.
“I love you with all my heart, kitten” the surname he use to call me since we met.
We heard a knock in our door. It was Jason.
“Hey, Guys, C’mon, We need to go, he’s almost out of the old station” He says from behind the door.
“We’re coming.” Dick in his serious tone answer Jason.
“It’s time, love.” And we went to change in our suits.
[10:45 p.m, San Francisco’s Old train station]
We get there, to end it up for once. We recognize the place that we had already beat some bad guys. It is dark but with some old yellow lights, behind the railroad of the train, there is an abyss that’s the reason why this station is closed, there’s 2 trains in the railroad, and a misterious silence.
Dick was the first one to appear, he told us to stay back until the joker appears. We stay in the dark, Jason is already upside the train station.
“Joker, i can offer you a deal. I’ll send you right to arkham and you wont have to fight against all of us.”
When we least expected, he apperead. Not in the way we expected, he had a hostage. He was holding a woman by her neck, she had her 30 years or more, tiny woman with glasses.
“This fucking whore was dealing my penalty for criminal acts in gotham. She was going to send me to arkham, can you believe it? and she ran to San Francisco so she could be safe from me.” The freak laughs out loud in his own typical way. “I guess you all asked yourselves what the hell i’m doing here? This cunt is the reason, now that she’s gonna die, i won’t to Arkham anymore and i’ll be free.” More and more laugh, i can’t bare hearing this asshole laugh like this anymore
He knew we’d be coming, he knew we’d be after him, but he didn’t stop.
“You won’t take a life from a inocent, Joker, let her go.” Dick says, confident and being sure that tonight he has one point: stop him.
“You did surprise me this time, Nightwing. Do you really think i’ll be letting her go? This is the first time i see you so defensive, what’s up? Love has made you soft?”
He draws a gun. Fuck. He points the gun at her jugular.
“Where’s the rest of your team of dumbasses, Little Bird? Are you by yourself? Are you going to tell them to leave or i will have to kill her so fast? I wish I could enjoy a little more”
“We can end up in two ways, Joker, one: you let her go and we will solve it with no inocente lives. Two: i kill you.” I can hear anger, fury in Dick’s voice
We were hiding in the back of the two trains, me, Dawn and Donna.. Jason was up in the roof of the station, ready to act, and now it’s the our. I give him the sign.
In a minute lot’s of things happen, it’s like a movie is passing by our eyes
Jason used the birdarangue to hit the joker in the leg, at the same time Dick pushes the hostage and tell her to go. Dick and the Joker start fighting physically, it gets rough and when we move to get in, a loud noise got us mute.
The joker had a bomb. My ear aches, my head is about to explode, but my only worrie is: is Dick fine? There’s a lot of smoke and i can’t see anything but i try to get closer, i need to see him. Something in my heart say it isn’t good.
“NIGHTWING?” i yell and it only hurts more. I have no answer. I crall a bit more and i call him again. “DICK?” still have no answer.
“Y/S/H/N, I don’t know where Dick is, he was right here, he was fighthing the joker, he..i..don’t know” Jason says still confused because he was also too close to joker like Dick.
The smoke was going away, i could see Jason again, he was all blodied because of the fragments that exploded with the bomb.
I was slowly recognizin the faces around me, and i didn’t see my boyfriend’s face. I started getting anxious, i started feeling bad and i had no more air, where’s Dick Grayson? “DICK WHERE ARE YOU, please answer me, dick” i still had strenght to yell but i felt my vision blur and i have no more strenght to finish the sentence. Where is Dick, where’s him?
“Y/N, I found this, I’m sorry, I think Dick couldn’t make it, i think he fell in the abssys.” Hank gave me a piece of his uniform, the black and blue fabric of his Nightwing uniform.
I couldn’t believe, it was like there was no ground in my feet, i felt everything getting far, i could barely hear anything anymore, this was the biggest pain i’ve ever felt, everything hurted and i felt like had no more air to breath.
I fell on the ground, i called, i yelled for his name but he never came, i can only feel donna come to help me and everything went black.
[6 a.m, TitansTower]
I woke up in our bed, It all felt like a nightmare. I couldn’t believe he wasn’t here, I had to go to the living room. I wish I could have stayed in bed because when i got in the room, all i saw was sad faces looking right at me, and i couldn’t take it, he’s not there.
“Y/N, come here” Dawn says calling me to her side.
“Dawn, it was real, wasn’t it? He couldn’t make it, could him?” I sob and try to think straight but it is too hard. It was like one tonne had fall in my head.
“He couldn’t, Y/N, we can believe it, but he couldn’t” Dawn is in front of me right now. Holding my hands, she was trying to make me feel better but I couldn’t. I could only feel pain but this time something else appeared and it was anger, because the Joker took him from me and he would pay.
“Jason, call Bruce” I said in a serious tone and i left to our bedroom.
When i got there, And I, I wanted the sheets to take me under because I can't help but think, what if I had one more night for goodbye? He won’t be here to turn the lights off, it will be only these four walls and me.
I went to take a shower, and staring at the shower’s wall i just could realize the numb i felt.
“I would give the world for more time to look at you” Dick caressed my face while we were under the shower
“I think we’ll have a long time, baby, because i’m yours and i do not pretend not being yours someday..” He kissed me, grabbing my legs he pressed me against the wall and we loved each other.
It hit me like a truck, the feeling of griefing was taking me. I tried to eat but the lump in my throat got in the way, this feeling, this feeling that i don’t have Dick anymore, it wasn’t human.
I follow to the living room, because i need to do it. Jason has lost his mentor, his old brother, the image of everything he wanted to be. Rachel has lost her image of parent. Gar has lost his leader. I need to be there for him, but the pain crashes my heart in many ways.When I get there, I hug every one of them and I sob by crying because I know how it hurts to understand it, then I left to the training room. I need to put this out, I can’t stand anymore, I’m going to train, I’m gonna make the Joker pay.I start to hit the punching bag, I hit it multiple times and I felt like I was losing my control, I kick it, I punch it with all my strenght.
“You, by yourself would detain him, i blindly believe it.” I told him, filling him with kissies over all his face.
“Okay, okay, baby, i’ll relax, we’ll be lying here after that and we’ll make love like there’s no other day on Earth.” He said
“You’re such a perv, Dick Grayson” I mock him and he starst tickling me.
“You make me, Y/N” and we kiss.
“I love you, D.” I tell him.
“I love you with all my heart, kitten”
“NO!” I yell punch the bag now crying when this memory hits me. “NO, DICK!” I punch it harder “YOU’RE NOT GONE” I keep yelling and i felt my body losing his strenght, until i felt Jason’s arms holding me, helping me and putting me on the ground.
“Y/N, I can’t stand seeing you like this, please” Jason says, after all, he’s like our little Bird, our little brother who’s Always on our feet, Always here.
“He’s dead, Jason, oh my god, he is dead.” I couldn’t believe how much it hurted. It is cruciating.
“You can and you will, Y/N, we need you, you gave the orders when Dick wasn’t here in the tower, you’ve Always been our second command.” I look at the kid’s eye and I start realizing they were needing me. Dick would never want me to destroy myself and give up on Titans, Because I can’t count how many things Dick had done for this team, it was his life. Our life.
“I’m here, Jaybird, I’ll recover for him and for you all. I need to talk to bruce first.”
[9 P.M, TitansTower]
I called Bruce, he was broken. But just like him, we seek for justice and that’s what’s going to happen. I ask Bruce to locate the Joker and me and them would catch him. For once.
“Team, go change, Joker is in the Central Museum, we’re going there.” I tell them the plain, we change and follow to the place.
[10 P.M, Central Museum]
The Museum was already closed, no people in there, only the fucking crazy Joker trying to do more crimes, but he wouldn’t, not here and nowhere.
When we first get in there, silente was dominating, he was hiding but he could show up anytime, so we were ready.
“You’re sure you want to do this, Y/S/H/N? Aren’t you feeling too bad, Darling? Your black uniform fits well your new status, because right now you’re a widow.” The bastars laughs out loud from my pain, but right now, i felt empty, i only had anger and fury going throught my mind.
“Won’t you show up, Joker?” I say so he can hear from wherever he is “Come here, Confront me. You’ve already took the life of the man i love. I don’t feel anything anymore.”
He appears, wth the most sassy and dirty smile in that fucking crazy face. My heart is so tiny right now. This man took my love, the only one i had in life.
“You guys won’t stop trying to detain me until i kill one by one?” He says to us
We get ready to start the Fighting but we get surprised by one of the glasses of the top windows cracking. The noise is so loud
“What is happening?” I hear Donna
“You’re wrong joker, you won’t finish to kill one by one because haven’t even started, you crap” This voice, this so well known voice. My heart pounds in my chest and I ask myself if i’m crazy or it is actually happening.
Then i look to the top of the museum and there he is. Holding on his bat-rope. My Black-and-Blue Bird. Alive.
“Nightwing, I asked myself when we’d see each other again. I believed you’d like to do some mistery but here you are. I have to tell you, your timing sucks.” Joker laughs.
I stay paralised looking at Dick. He was here, right in front of me.
“What can I do? It’s a gift.” He answers the joker, fastly gets down to the ground and kisses me. “I couldn’t die, I fought too much not to die, because I had to come back. To you.” He kisses me.
“Rachel! NOW!” Donna yells, she wraps him in her lasso of truth and Raven envolve him with her black magic. They take him to San Francisco police which was outside the museum waiting to take him to arkham. We did beat him.
[1 A.M, TitansTower]
The going back home was unbeliavable, the guys were crazy about it, Gar and Jason wouldn’t get out from Dick’s feet. Our leader was back.
“Guys, I appreciate your love, You all are my Family and i’m so grateful, I can’t explain how hard it was, but i’m here, and tomorrow i’ll clarify everything. Because right now i’m going to love my girl.” Everyone laughs and we follow to our room.
There’s no words, there’s only two crazy lovers wanting everything the other can give, because the time that passed was too much for both of them to handle.
Dick was home, with me.
#dick grayson imagine#dick grayson x reader#dick grayson x y/n#dick grayson#nightwing#nightwing x reader#dc nightwing#nightwing x y/n#dc comics#dcu titans#titans#bruce wayne#rachel roth#dawn granger
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(Planning the Day) To Meet You
Wangxian, Modern AU, Slow Burn, E-Rated
[Read on AO3]
Chapter 13
Wei Ying
Good morning!
Ah you’ve been awake for 4 hours by now right
Haha
Lan Wangji
Good morning.
Wei Ying
Do you want to have a picnic today?
I’ll bring a blanket
So you don’t have to worry about your trousers getting dirty
Lan Wangji
I'd love to.
Wei Ying
And before you offer, I’ll prepare everything!
Okay???
I’ll take care of the food!
I can see you typing, you want to protest, right?
Okay
You can bring coffee, because yours tastes better
And tea for yourself
But other than that, only bring your beautiful self!
Lan Wangji
… alright
Wei Ying
Great!!! :) :) :)
Should we say 5:30 pm?
Won’t be as hot then
Park in front of uni?
I’ll find us a good spot
Lan Wangji
That sounds good.
Wei Ying
Alright!
❤❤❤❤
Lan Wangji finds it… a little challenging to stick to only bringing tea and coffee. But he doesn’t want Wei Ying to feel like he wants to undermine his efforts, so he does not even bring a cake.
Wei Ying has found them a nice spot under a large tree, a little away from any frolicking students. He’s spread out a colourful blanket, as promised, sitting cross-legged and barefoot, but jumps to his feet, as soon as he spots Lan Wangji.
Lan Wangji realises he doesn’t know how to greet Wei Ying. Now that they’re boyfriends. He wants to kiss him, but they’re in public.
Wei Ying also hesitates once they’re standing in front of each other and for a few seconds, they just stand… and stare. Wei Ying has pulled his hair back with Lan Wangji’s hair tie, but as always, his hair can’t be fully tamed and a few loose strands frame his face, caressing his skin in the gentle breeze.
“Hello,” Lan Wangji finally says with a soft smile.
“Hi.” Wei Ying smiles, too.
Lan Wangji does cross the final distance then and presses a short, sweet kiss to Wei Ying’s lips.
When they part, Wei Ying sighs, almost relieved.
“Wei Ying?”
“Ah, I just get… nervous.”
“Every day, Wei Ying,” Lan Wangji stresses, in case he forgot.
Wei Ying smiles at him, strokes his cheek, then drags him towards the blanket.
“Lan Zhan… I may have gone overboard. I can’t even tell anymore. How much do two grown people eat? I don’t know!”
There really is… a lot of food sitting on the blanket. Lan Wangji is someone who likes to overprepare… this beats even his best overpreparing efforts. All sorts of cut-up vegetables and fruits, baozi, tea eggs, milk bread...
“This is all for us?”
“Uhm… yep.”
“Well, it’s always nice to have leftovers.” Lan Wangji turns to Wei Ying and squeezes his hand. “A week’s worth of leftovers.”
“Hey, Lan Zahn! Stop teasing me!” But Wei Ying doesn’t sound insulted. He laughs, eyes sparkling, dimples showing and ah, he’s so beautiful.
“Thank you, truly. It all looks lovely.”
“Ha, hopefully it tastes good, too…”
“I have no doubt.”
Lan Wangji takes off his shoes and finds a free spot on the blanket. Wei Ying stares down at him, a little in awe, before he joins him.
Even though the variety of choices is overwhelming, Lan Wangji tries his best to taste everything that’s on offer. Wei Ying only starts eating once he’s satisfied Lan Wangji likes what he has prepared. It does taste good, so Lan Wangji makes sure to compliment everything well.
Once Wei Ying believes him that he can’t eat anything more, he packs everything back into the picnic cooler bag, except for a tupperware with cut-up watermelon.
“Lan Zhan, can I borrow your lap?”
“Of course.”
Wei Ying stretches out on the blanket, pillowing his head on Lan Wangji’s lap. Then he tells Lan Wangji to feed him the watermelon, which he happily does. Lan Wangji watches the shadows of the rustling tree play on Wei Ying’s face. Sometimes he lets his fingers linger after he’s fed Wei Ying another piece and Wei Ying will kiss or lick them. His other hand is intertwined with Wei Ying’s and resting on Wei Ying’s chest. It’s like a scene from a dream he hasn’t dreamed yet.
“Are you fucking kidding me?”
Lan Wangji whips his head up, as does Wei Ying, as much as it is possible for him, without actually lifting his head.
Before them stands Nie Huaisang, signature fan in hand, staring down at them with a bemused expression.
“Nie Huaisang.” Lan Wangji nods. It’s not polite to not stand up, but his legs serve a greater purpose at the moment and are not available.
“A-Sang, what are you doing here?” Wei Ying laughs nervously.
“Feeling betrayed and hurt you didn’t tell me you finally stopped pining over Lan Wangji long enough to actually do something about it.”
“Hey!” Wei Ying does sit up now, to Lan Wangji’s disappointment, and points accusingly at Nie Huaisang. “I wasn’t pining!”
“Sure, sure.”
“Also… it’s… well it’s a recent development, so…”
Nie Huaisang only huffs, but Lan Wangji knows him well enough to know he’s hiding a grin behind his fan.
“Would you like some watermelon,” Lan Wangji offers, in a tone of voice Nie Huaisang should know means he wants him to fuck off.
“So sweet of you to offer, Lan Wangji. But no worries, I will leave you two alone so you can continue your disgusting display of whatever it was I just had to witness. I have a hot date to attend to.”
“Good for you! Have fun! Bye!” Wei Ying waves, or rather, shoos him away. Nie Huaisang ignores him.
“Ah, Wangji… you should maybe check in with your brother. Today he told me he was considering buying a whole ass palm tree for his balcony. Please stop him.”
“You saw Xichen?” It’s not unthinkable, but he’s never known them to spend time together without Nie Mingjue present as well.
“Well, for my appointment, right?” He winks. “Client #1.”
“...Right.” That makes more sense. “I had wanted to thank you for helping my brother, but I see it wasn’t entirely selfless.”
“You wound me!”
“I doubt it,” Lan Wangji replies dryly. Then adds: “Still… thank you. I appreciate it.”
“My pleasure, obviously. And don’t worry, I’m working on finding him more clients! I have… ideas.” Nie Huaisang’s smile reminds him of one of Wei Ying’s wicked smiles, but this one fills him with nothing but concern.
“Huaisang…” Nie Huaisang having ideas is rarely a good thing, in Lan Wangji’s opinion.
“Gotta go! Have fun boys, but not too much, you’re in public!” He throws them a kiss and disappears.
Lan Wangji rolls his eyes, but can’t help a small smile, before pulling Wei Ying back down into his lap. Wei Ying immediately takes Lan Wangji’s hand and puts it back on his chest.
“It’s still so weird to me that you know Huaisang too!”
“Mn.”
“Lan Zhan… we could have met way earlier if you’d ever come to any of his parties!”
“Would you have liked me then? I’m better in libraries than at parties.” He tries to imagine himself at one of those gatherings… and can only see himself either leaving immediately or hiding away in an empty room or the bathroom. He does not think Wei Ying would’ve ever started talking to him under such circumstances.
“Lan Zhan, how could I ever not like you?” Wei Ying exclaims, indignant. “There’s no reality where I would not like you!”
Lan Wangji lifts their hands and presses a kiss to Wei Ying’s knuckles.
“Though, maybe it’s good we only met now… Teenage me was a fucking idiot and college before A-Yuan me was a bit of a mess…”
“I would have still liked you.” There’s also no reality where Lan Wangji would not like Wei Ying.
“Well, I was always very pretty, so…” Wei Ying winks up at him. It’s more like an aborted blink, but Lan Wangji appreciates it anyway.
“You’re very pretty,” he acknowledges, because it’s true. “Beautiful.”
“No need to flirt so hard, Lan Zhan! I’m already ready and willing!” Wei Ying emphasizes his statement by licking his lower lip and arching his neck, so Lan Wangji can see the slightly faded marks from yesterday.
“Wei Ying,” Lan Wangji admonishes, though he feels heat crawling up his neck.
Wei Ying cackles, but doesn’t tease him further. He lifts his free hand to gently stroke Lan Wangji’s cheek, the movement a bit clumsy due to Wei Ying’s position.
“I’m glad I met you, Lan Zhan.”
“Me too.”
For a sweet moment they simply look at each other, smiling. Then…
“Can we go to your apartment so we can make out?”
“Yes.”
An hour later, Lan Wangji is sitting on his couch, and Wei Ying is straddling his lap, in the process of unbuttoning Lan Wangji’s shirt.
“I can’t believe you really look like this,” Wei Ying breathes against his lips, undoing the last button. “You’re ridiculous, Lan Zhan.”
“Want to see you, too.”
Wei Ying smirks and without further ado, he pulls his t-shirt over his head. It lands somewhere on the floor behind him.
“Beautiful,” is all Lan Wangji can say, running his hands reverently up Wei Ying’s sides, ghosting his fingers over his stomach.
He doesn’t get to enjoy this view much longer, because Wei Ying kisses him again. Lan Wangji hadn’t thought the act of kissing could be improved on, but being able to touch Wei Ying like this, the warmth of his skin, being able to feel the muscles move under his fingertips, feeling Wei Ying’s hands on his own skin… He’s so overwhelmed by it all, he doesn’t even notice he’s hard until Wei Ying very deliberately grinds down against him.
“Lan Zhan…” Wei Ying draws a line of kisses from Lan Wangji’s mouth to his ear. His fingers stroke the skin above his waistband. “I want to make you come. Can I?”
Lan Wangji almost comes right then, so Wei Ying certainly can.
“Yes.” Lan Wangji is surprised he manages to form even such a simple word, but feels like soon he might not be able to do that.
Wei Ying kisses him again, licks into his mouth, as his fingers deftly open Lan Wangji’s belt. Lan Wangji wants to keep kissing him, but he also… he doesn’t want to miss anything, so he gently pushes Wei Ying back.
“Too much?” Wei Ying immediately halts his movements.
“No. But… I want to see.” Lan Wangji expects to feel mortified about his boldness, but it never comes. The heat in Wei Ying’s eyes keeps it at bay. If Wei Ying looks at him like this, he can be bold.
“Oh?” Wei Ying leans back even further and grins. “Lan Zhan, look closely then.”
He slowly pulls out his belt, drops it on the floor, undoes the button, unzips his fly. His knuckles brush against Lan Wangji’s cock, only a thin layer of cloth between them. Lan Wangji’s heart is trying to burst out of his chest. He’s trying to see everything: Wei Ying’s face, his teeth digging into his lower lip, his pebbled nipples, his arm muscles moving as he’s unravelling Lan Wangji…
Then Wei Ying frees his cock, wraps his hand around it and squeezes. Lan Wangji has to close his eyes after all, throws his head back and breathes hard, trying not to come.
When he opens his eyes again, Wei Ying is staring at him, eyes dark and hungry.
“Fuck… Lan Zhan, you really are ridiculous.” Wei Ying wets his lips, stares at his cock. Fuck, Lan Wangji really is not going to last long. How could he?
“Wei Ying… want to see…” Lan Wangji has a hard time finding the right - or any - words, so he moves his hand until it rests on the waistband of Wei Ying’s shorts, a question in his eyes.
Wei Ying only gives him an eager nod and squeezes his cock again, as though that’s a good way to answer a question. Lan Wangji tries to not let that distract him from the feeling of touching Wei Ying’s cock for the first time.
He wants to take his time, see Wei Ying’s reactions and find out how he wants to be touched, but Wei Ying keeps touching him too, fingers playful yet determined at the same time, and he needs all his focus for feeling. Despite wanting to see, he ends up only looking at Wei Ying’s face, in awe at all the little signs of pleasure he finds there.
Suddenly, Wei Ying shimmies closer so their cocks touch, he can feel Wei Ying’s hand moving against his own and it’s too much, his body can’t contain the pleasure anymore, it’s too much, it’s… Lan Wangji squeezes his eyes shut and comes.
“Fuck. Fuck that’s so hot…”
Lan Wangji is still floating, not quite feeling in control of his body, because Wei Ying has that control right now and Lan Wangji doesn’t really want it back. But he wants to see Wei Ying come undone too, so he makes a weak attempt at moving his hand.
Wei Ying laughs, takes Lan Wangji’s hand off his cock, ignores his protesting whine, slicks his cock up with Lan Wangji’s spend, then wraps Lan Wangji’s hand back around his cock and keeps his hand on top of Lan Wangji’s. He shows Lan Wangji how to move, when to squeeze… The noises he makes, the way he moves his hips, so he can fuck up into their hands… Lan Wangji tries to take it all in, but he already knows he’ll need to do it again and again.
When Wei Ying comes, it’s beautiful. He gasps “Lan Zhan”, throws his head back, mouth open and groans, spilling hot over both of their hands. If Lan Wangji wasn’t already spent, he’d come just from seeing that.
“Fuck… that was…”
But Lan Wangji doesn’t get to hear what that was, because Wei Ying kisses him thoroughly, and for a little while, nothing else matters.
“We should get cleaned up.”
Lan Wangji, still in a daze, tries to move, or at least tell Wei Ying that there are wet wipes in the bathroom and in the bedroom (in the bedside drawer, next to his lube), but Wei Ying presses him back against the couch and shakes his head.
“Stay. I’ll take care of you.”
Wei Ying looks down at the mess, snorts a laugh, gets up and steps out of his shorts and boxers. He smirks at Lan Wangji, who suddenly has trouble breathing, turns around and walks off towards the bathroom.
Lan Wangji watches him leave, or rather, stares at his ass, then leans his head against the wall and tries to regain his senses.
Wei Ying returns after a while, cleaned up, a wet towel in his hand. He kneels down on the couch next to Lan Wangji and begins cleaning him. He gently moves the towel across his cock, his stomach, his hand. It’s terribly intimate and Lan Wangji doesn’t dare move or say anything. When he’s done, Wei Ying tucks Lan Wangji back into his boxers and closes his trousers. He pulls his own boxers and shorts back on, returns the towel to the bathroom, then drops down on the couch next to Lan Wangji, grinning up at him.
“So, Lan Zhan… did you like that?”
Lan Wangji stares at him, a little exasperated. ‘Like’’. What an inadequate word.
“Mhm? What’s that frown? A yes?”
“Of course.”
Lan Wangji takes Wei Ying’s hand and laces their fingers together.
“Thank you.”
“Thank you?” Wei Ying gives a startled laugh. “What for? The orgasm? Hopefully just the first of many, Lan Zhan!”
“Thank you for…” Lan Wangji doesn’t actually know what he’s grateful for, just that his heart is full and warm and… “... for being Wei Ying.”
“Ah… well…” Wei Ying seems at a loss for what to say, so he pulls Lan Wangji’s face towards him and presses a soft kiss to his lips. “Mhm… Lan Zhan, thank you, too.”
Wei Ying pulls him further until they’re lying down on the couch, then throws one arm and one leg over Lan Wangji’s body, snuggling against him. Lan Wangji enjoys simply being close to him for a while, almost falls asleep.
“Wei Ying.”
“Mhm?”
“Do you want to meet my brother?”
“What, now?!” Wei Ying lifts his head, aghast.
“No, of course not.” The last thing Lan Wangji wants to do right now is move. Or let go of Wei Ying. He also doesn’t particularly want to see his brother, so soon after… “Tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow? That’s… that’s… in one day!”
“Yes.”
“Uhm…”
“Too soon?”
“I… don’t think so? I just didn’t expect you to ask.” Wei Ying puffs out his cheeks, looks at Lan Wangji for a few seconds, clearly thinking about it, then finally smiles. “Of course. I’d love to meet your brother.”
“We can do it later, if you’re not comfortable yet.”
“Well, I’m just nervous! What if he doesn’t like me!”
“He already likes you.”
“Oh? Told him about me?” Wei Ying looks surprised again, but pleased and his shoulders relax a little.
“Yes.”
Wei Ying laughs, finally puts his head down again and Lan Wangji tightens his arm, pulling Wei Ying closer against him.
“You will meet the bunnies, too.”
“Oh? Yes! Cloud and Jade! Ah, I’ll get to see you snuggle them; you can recreate that picture for me!”
Wei Ying starts one of his little monologues, where he’ll ask Lan Wangji some questions but never actually expects an answer. He muses whether Lan Wangji or the bunnies are cuter, what he should wear to meet Xichen, whether they should get a pet for A-Yuan… Lan Wangji listens to it all, smile never leaving his face, blinking slowly, feeling the soft skin of Wei Ying’s back under his fingers.
“-maybe we’ll just buy a plant first, it’s not as tragic if that one dies, and-”
“Wei Ying.”
“Mhm?”
Lan Wangji doesn’t say anything, only deepens his smile. Wei Ying returns his smile, infinitely brighter, and strokes his cheek.
“Ah… Lan Zhan… me too.”
#the untamed#mdzs#cql#wangxian#lan wangji/wei wuxian#lan wangji#wei wuxian#modern au#fic update#To Meet You verse#this chapter is spicy#betty drabbles
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Of Latte’s and Lingerie- Chapter 6
I’m delirious, sleep deprived and high on caffeine but I did the the thing so who’s really winning here? Anyways, if you haven’t already, here’s the previous chapters 1 2 3 4 5 or a link to AO3. Also, if you wanna be added to the taglist please tell me, I’m a whore for praise. Hope this doesn’t suck. Rock and Roll.
Taglist: @catsssmeow
Marinette woke up feeling like someone had shoved a wad of cotton balls in her mouth. God she hated wine. One would think that after years of “wine nights” with Alya, she’d realize she should never participate in them on work nights. Marinette glanced halfheartedly at her phone, searching for the time.
7:00
“FUCK!”
Marinette jumped up like she’d been prodded with a hot poker. She ran to her little chest of drawers and frantically grabbed the first pair of pants she saw. As she attempted to put them on, she simultaneously hopped toward her closet. After a quick analysis she grabbed a blouse that she only hoped complimented her pants. Marinette shimmied her way into her blouse and made her way into the bathroom. Tikki sat on the countertop glaring at her
“Meow.”
Marinette grabbed her toothbrush and squirted a generous amount of toothpaste on the bristles.
“I know Tikki but I have to be at work in an hour and god knows what traffic’s gonna be like.” Marinette brushed her teeth with purpose, contemplating the agenda of the day. She was never drinking with Alya on a Tuesday night ever again.
Marinette groaned at herself. She hated going to work without makeup. Because every single time without fail, Audrey had a passive aggressive comment to make.
Mari I know a good makeup artist if you ever need any tips.
Did someone die? You look awful.
Audrey was right. She was a bitch.
Marinette briskly walked into the kitchen and started the coffee pot, grumbling to herself about bitchy bosses. She checked the time on the oven.
7:05
Marinette began calculating. If she left by 7:15, she would be fine. That gave her 45 minutes to make a half hour drive. She’d make it with time to spare.
Audrey put up with a lot more from Marinette than she did from most people (for the sake of art, as she would say) but Marinette was not looking to push the limits. While she waited for the coffee to brew, she grabbed Tikki’s food from the pantry and poured it in the bowl. Tikki didn’t so much as glance at Marinette as she strolled into the kitchen and began eating her food. Marinette grabbed her brush from the counter of the bar and started brushing her hair wildly. When the coffee pot beeped impatiently at her, she quickly filled up her mug and one to go coffee for the road. It was gonna be one of those days.
Marinette put her hair in a quick sloppy French braid that fell down to just the center of her shoulder blades and gulped down her first coffee. When she glanced back up at the oven clock she sighed harshly.
7:10
Marinette grabbed her purse, chugged the last bit of coffee from her mug and slipped on some flats she kept near the door.
“Bye Tikki, I love you!”
…
When Adrien woke up he was more than a little disoriented. He couldn’t see a thing and he couldn’t breathe but he could feel fur buried in his face.
“Phlghhh.” His voice was muffled by the cat laying peacefully across his face. Adrien picked the cat up and held him up above his head.
“Is this what we’re doing now?” Plagg stared back with disinterest. Once Adrien set Plagg down on the empty side of the bed, he glanced at his beeping alarm clock.
7:00
Adrien sighed contentedly and strolled into the kitchen to start a pot of coffee. His favorite part of his job was the late start. He had three hours of peace before he had to be at work so Adrien relished in it.
“Plagg, what do we want for breakfast?” Plagg elected not to dignify Adrien with a response.
“Yeah, I was thinking cereal too.”
…
No. nO. NO. NOOOO.
That’s what went through Marinette’s head when she got about 15 minutes down the road and realized she left the to go coffee sitting on the counter. It was at this point that Marinette began bargaining with herself.
If I drive five miles per hour over the speed limit for the next five miles and stop lightly but maybe not all the way at Dupont Circle, then I’ll have time to pick up an order from Dunn’s. Maybe I could call the store? God I hope Tim is there.
…
“Alright Plagg. I’m gonna go to Dunn’s. I’ll see you after work.”
“Meow.” Plagg didn’t so much as lift his head from the couch
“Don’t judge me! It’s perfectly normal for people to have multiple cups of coffee a day. Good day to you sir.”
“Meow.” Adrien scowled as he stepped in to the hall.
“I SAID GOOD DAY!”
Adrien probably would’ve laughed to himself if he didn’t happen to walk into the hall at the same time as three other residents in his apartment complex. He had to trudge his way to the elevator, avoiding eye contact with every living thing in his periphery. Is this what his father meant when he asked Adrien not to make a fool of himself?
…
“Thank you, Tim. You’re a lifesaver, I’ll be there in 5!” Marinette hung up the phone and glanced at the clock.
7:30
Marinette did the math. She was at the light just in front of Dunn’s and she did the math faster than she’d ever done any math in her life.
Her job was only 15 minutes away from Dunn’s. If it took 5 minutes to get in, pay and get out, the light would probably be about 3 minutes long to turn in and out of Dunn’s. If you add all that together, plus the walk from the work parking lot to the door (which Marinette estimated to be about 5 more minutes), and if she was lucky, so very lucky, Audrey wouldn’t notice her being 1 minute late.
The things Marinette does for coffee.
…
Adrien was able to find his usual spot. He was able to order his usual mocha frappe and he was a little disappointed (but unsurprised) to see Marinette was not in her usual spot. Adrien had noticed after weeks of people watching that Marinette didn’t come to Dunn’s until after 5 pm, at which point she was usually frantically working on something. Adrien had also noticed that when he came in at about 7:30 every morning, he was the only person who would actually come in and sit down. Now, Adrien didn’t always go to Dunn’s twice a day… but he did it more often than he cared to admit.
“You know I give you all my money. I feel like you should at least take me out to dinner,” Adrien had joked.
“Nice try sweet cheeks,” Tim had said as he handed Adrien his change.
Adrien loved Dunn’s. What a peacefully, predictable and wonderful place.
…
“Yes. yES YES! YEEEEES!”
Marinette was right on schedule. She was screeching into Dunn’s at exactly 7:33 and she’d never been more proud of herself in her life.
…
Just as Adrien was beginning to settle in, the door busted open. Marinette arrived in the most ridiculous fashion Adrien had ever seen. She had a debit card in one hand, a shoe in another and she was breathing incredibly hard, as though she’d run a marathon. Her purse slipped from her shoulder to her elbow and it seemed like what had once been a French braid, was now a French mess because while the top of her head seemed to present her hair in a beautiful plait, as you moved down you could see that her hair was falling, falling ,falling until it was sprawled across her back.
“Tim, please tell me it’s already made?” Tim looked at her with wide eyes and a cautious expression.
“Um, I think I’ll add another shot of espresso while you pay, just uh, swipe.”
…
“Fuck me,” Marinette muttered. She dropped her shoe to the ground and tried to wriggle her foot back into it as she swiped her debit card.
“Are you okay Marinette?”
Now at this moment, Marinette froze in horror and a series of realizations hit her all at once. Number one, she’d forgot to put a hair tie in after braiding her hair that morning. Number two, she had walked into Dunn’s with only one shoe. Number three, when Tim said on the phone about 6 minutes earlier that the shop had been dead, he hadn’t meant empty. And finally, number four, the hot boy was sitting in his table in the corner.
“Oh, um yes! Just late! But I need coffee, and I left mine at home so I’m late and I stopped for coffee… Stress.” Marinette could practically see the word vomit coming from her mouth. This really was one of those days.
…
Adrien could physically see the stress on Marinette’s face before the word even came out of her mouth. He could tell she was nervous before her other words stumbled out too and Adrien felt awful for her.
“Well, maybe I can help! Here, I always keep an extra hair tie in my wallet for one of my friends. She’s kind of obsessive about her hair. Do you want to borrow it?” He could see a touch of relief in Marinette’s face.
“Oh my gosh. That’s really sweet, thank you!” Adrien glanced in the back and saw Tim give him a wink before busying himself with Marinette’s coffee.
“You know, we keep running into each other, but it’d be nice to actually plan a time to meet up. Why don’t I give you my number?”
…
Marinette was hyperventilating just a bit. There was a lot going on and it was very overwhelming. And that was the excuse she would give Alya when she explained the events that transpired there in that coffee shop.
She had handed the hot boy her phone and just as he’d handed it back, Tim had come back with the coffee. Without so much as a sideways glance at her phone, she snatched the coffee and turned briefly to face the hot boy.
“Thank you! Late. Really late. Gotta go. Lext you tater.” And with that, she gave Tim an appreciative nod, and ran out the door.
When she glanced at the clock in her car, Marinette was happy to see that she had a minute to spare before she needed to peel out of the parking lot. She chose this minute to take a look at the new contact in her phone. Finally Alya could stop bugging Marinette about not knowing his name.
When Marinette unlocked her phone and looked at her newest contact she had to take a full 3 minutes (that she didn’t have) to recover. There was screaming, maybe some crying, thrashing. It was a big ball of Why is this happening to me? She reread the contact name about 30 times before it really sunk in that this was really just one of those days.
Coffee Buddy.
The risk of going to Dunn’s that morning was calculated but boy was Marinette bad at math.
Next Chapter
#miraculous ladybug#coffee shop au#adrien agreste#marinette dupain cheng#adrienette#adrinette#mlb fanfic#my fic#my fanfic#miraculous fanfic
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Who Cares?
Fandom: Jacksepticeye
Characters: Chase Brody, Doctor Henrik von Schneeplestein, Marvin the Magnificent, Jackieboy Man, Jameson Jackson, Antisepticeye
Content warning: a lot of mentions of depression, addiction, alcoholism, suicide mentions, suicidal thoughts
If I wasn’t on mobile I’d use the zalgo text for anti so instead it’s bolded
[[MORE]]
As soon as Chase closed the door to his bedroom he flopped onto the bed, his smiling and laughing expression he wore seconds ago with his family immediately replaced by a somber one. He took long, deep breaths, having a staring contest with the ceiling (it of course won). After... well he couldn’t tell how long he laid like that - time seemed to slow and drag on forever but also go way too fast - he spoke so softly to himself that he barely heard himself speak. “Am I really depressed? Or is it just that I’m reminding myself that I’m supposed to be sad? I was just out there with everyone for hours and wasn’t sad at all. Am I just faking it?” A lone tear escaped from his eye and he didn’t bother to wipe it away.
He heard his phone vibrate, but didn’t bother to check it. The only person that would be calling him is his therapist’s office, attempting to confirm a meeting he already planned on skipping. He went to one to humor Jackie, and of course he had to schedule another visit, but the whole time he knew that he wasn’t going back. He would just be wasting his therapists time, and taking up space for people who really needed therapy.
His room wasn’t far from the room where all the other egos were still gathered - he told the others that he was going to his room to plan the next bro average video (which he really should be doing anyway) - and he could faintly hear some conversations. From what he could piece together, they started playing Cards Against Humanity and somehow Jameson was winning, even though he didn’t understand most of the cards. He could tell that they were having a lot of fun - a lot of fun without him.
“Would anyone even care if I-“ he spoke, again, barely audible (he wondered if he even vocalized the words, or if they halted in his head). He had to stop himself short, not daring to finish the thought. “Chase you idiot, you already tried to do it and you know what outcomes you would get. Doc would blame himself if he couldn’t save you, Marvin would lock himself away in his room and refuse to come out, Jackie would take out all his emotions on fighting villains that were unbeatable, at least in his headspace, and Jamie would...” he trailed off, biting his lip. “That’s right... he wasn’t even here when I did it...” Chase blinked and violently shook his head. “PMA Chase... PMA... PMA... PM- ya know they can shove that up their arse. I need a fucking drink is what I need not some positivity bullshit,” he grumbled, going back to further examine his closet. There had to be something...
Huffing, he picked up a pair of shoes, put his hat back on his head, and wiped any evidence of tears off his face before walking out of his room. He took a deep breath right before he got to the room where all the egos were gathered - he was right about his guesses as to their activity - and strode to the door. Jackie looked up from the game as Chase walked past to get his coat. “Hey Chase, what’s up? Where’re ya going?” He sensed something off about him (but it could’ve just been paranoia) and needed to make sure nothing happened to any of his brothers.
Chase blinked. He didn’t expect any of them to notice and now all of them were staring at him and- ‘deep breaths’ he thought to himself. “I’m just... going for a walk. I’m stuck on trying to find a new idea and... need to clear my head.”
If Jackie still had his doubts, he kept them to himself. “You have your phone on you right?”
Chase held up his phone as evidence, giving a “yup” in response. With that, he walked out the front door. “Of fucking course it’s raining,” he muttered, heading towards one of the bars in town. He knew better than to try any of the ones close to the house, as they knew him and wouldn’t contribute to his addiction. Finally, he ended up at one that he didn’t even know existed, and figured it was worth a shot. He walked up to the bar and sat on the stool, surveying his options, pupils dilating by simply looking at the bottles. He told the bartender to “keep em coming until I’m so plastered I’m falling off the chair.”
The bartender eyed him, as it was 4:30 pm on a Tuesday, but didn’t question it, besides offering a “rough day?”
Chase nodded to that, “I guess you could call it that.”
The bartender handed him his drink. “If you want to just drink your cares away, go ahead. But if you want an ear then I’ll be here.”
Chase took a long swig, then registered what the bartender was saying, growling slightly. “I don’t need fucking therapy.” He finished his drink and felt his phone buzz in his pocket.
Baby Bean: “Hello Chase, it’s Jameson. Please do let us know when you will be returning. Marvin wants to know when he should begin making dinner, as he does not want your food to get cold, although given his history, you might be better off eating while you are out! 😆 I also should tell you that, while I do not know for certain, I think that some of the others are fearing that you are out getting bent, but if you say you’re just going for a walk, then I believe you! ☺️💚 Have a swell rest of your stroll!”
Chase sighed, grabbing the phone with his other hand. ‘What do I even say to this?’
“uh idk when i’ll be back. tell marv not to worry about me and not to burn the place down. also ty jj it means a lot that u trust me like that. i just wish the others would too” he deleted the last sentence, not wanting his brothers to feel guilty over not trusting him, especially when they had every right to be doubtful - considering he was actually at a bar. It also hurt to see that Jameson trusted him, because that meant he was betraying his trust, and he drank another glass at the thought.
About 20 minutes later, he felt his phone vibrate again. Judging by how it was many texts all at once, he assumed it was Marvin before he even pulled out his phone.
Magic Man: “Hey”
Magic Man: “I’m making dinner rn”
Magic Man: “It’s mac and cheese and whatever frozen chicken we have”
Magic Man: “Jamie said u were taking a longer walk but like it’s raining out and I don’t want u to get sick”
Magic Man: “Plz respond Chase”
Magic Man: “U there?”
“yo chill marv”
“i stepped inside a store to get out of the rain”
Magic Man: “Do u want one of us to pick u up??”
Magic Man: “If u lmk wya I can teleport to u”
Magic Man: “Or I’m sure Hen or Jackie would drive to get u if u just wanted to drive back”
Magic Man: “Ik how u feel abt teleporting”
Chase bit his lip before downing another glass. He forgot exactly what he was drinking, but it was alcohol and that’s all he cared about. He didn’t want to tell them that he was at a bar, not even thinking about how anyone could see or smell that he was drunk from a block away. He got another drink and almost forgot to respond before another message came through.
Magic Man: “Chase?”
Magic Man: “Plz just tell me where u r so we can pick u up”
“what so u can make fun of me??? nope i’ll b home later. i’m gonna stay here a bit longer then WALK home”
Chase put his phone away, not wanting to see Marvin’s response and just wanting to see more alcohol in his hands.
It was probably about an hour later when the bartender finally cut him off. He said that he was told to stop him when he looked like he was going to fall out of the chair and so the bartender wasn’t going to let him have any more. Plus his boss would be pissed if he let Chase leave any more intoxicated than he already was.
Chase stormed out of the bar and back into the rain before realizing he had no idea where we was. He looked around and tried to find something familiar but came up with absolutely nothing. He started walking in one direction, but it felt wrong, so he started in the opposite direction, which also felt wrong. So, he did what anyone else in his situation would do - he cried in the rain on the sidewalk of a basically empty street. After he felt he cried all he could, he looked at his notifications.
Baby Bean: 2 unread messages
Ze Best Doctah: 1 unread message
Magic Man: 13 unread messages, 2 missed calls
Spider-Man 2.0: 7 unread messages, 5 missed calls
Turtle: 1 unread message
“Shit.” Chase mumbled, scanning through the messages.
Baby Bean: “Hello Chase, Jameson again! 😊 You haven’t responded to anyone and we are all very worried about you. I’m hoping that your cellular device simply ran out of charge, but Jackie is informing me that when he tries to call you it would not ring as long as it is if your device has run out of battery.”
Baby Bean: “Chase, it’s Jameson. Where are you? I am getting increasingly worried for your safety, as is everyone else. Please respond to one of us.”
Ze Best Doctah: “Chase are you alright? You are scaring all of us. Do you need help? Or a ride? Marvin said you would not tell him where you were. I am praying you are not at a bar but right now I don’t know what to think. I trusted you would be smart and safe but now I’m not sure if you were either. Please call one of us when you see this.”
Magic Man: “Chase y do u think I would make fun of u?”
Magic Man: “R u ok?”
Magic Man: “R u mad at me?”
Magic Man: “Chase plz answer someone”
Magic Man: “If I said smth I’m sry”
Magic Man: “Just plz come home”
Magic Man: “Chase?”
Magic Man: “Ur dinner is getting cold WHERE ARE YOU”
Magic Man: “If u put on dnd I’ll b pissed”
Missed call from Magic Man
Magic Man: “Chase I stg if ur at a bar rn imma fucking deck u”
Magic Man: “No actually I’ll let Jackie do that”
Missed call from Magic Man
Magic Man: “Pick up ur damn phone Brody!!”
Magic Man: “Where tf r u????!!!!”
Spider-Man 2.0: “where did you go chase???????”
Spider-Man 2.0: “I thought you were just going on a walk”
Spider-Man 2.0: “THIS IS A VERY LONG WALK ITS BEEN HOURS”
Missed call from Spider-Man 2.0
Spider-Man 2.0: “if I have to save your ass from something or someone”
2 missed calls from Spider-Man 2.0
Spider-Man 2.0: “this isn’t funny chase”
Spider-Man 2.0: “I’m really fucking worried about you
2 missed calls from Spider-Man 2.0
Spider-Man 2.0: “CHASE I SWEAR IF YOU DONT PICK UP YOUR PHONE IM COMING TO LOOK FOR YOU”
Turtle: “Brody get your ass home RIGHT NOW!”
Chase weighed his options between who seemed the least pissed at him. Marvin and Jackieboy were obviously out. He didn’t particularly want to call Anti either. That left Henrik and Jameson. He went to the contact and pressed the call button. It barely rang before it was picked up.
“CHASE!! VERE ZEE FUCK HAFFE VOU BEEN??” Henrik shouted, his accent the thickest Chase has ever heard it, barely understandable in his drunken haze
“I’m sorry Hen” he slurred
“Chase vere are vou? Are vou fucking betrunken?!”
“Hen, Hen what? I-I don’t know what... what you’re saying.”
“HES ASKING IF YOU’RE DRUNK ASSHOLE!” Jackie shouted. “You’re on speakerphone you dick!”
Chase couldn’t see it but Jameson was trying to tell Jackie to calm down.
“OH FUCK NO THIS IS AS CALM AS I’LL BE JAMIE!”
Chase sat down on the sidewalk, leaning against a building. “I’m not fucking drunk,” he slurred
“Tell that to your voice.” Marvin piped up.
“Fiiiiiiiineeeeee mayyybeee I had a drink or few. Happy?”
“How many is ein few?”
Chase snorted and started laughing like that was just the funniest thing ever. “Fuck if I know, I wasn’t counting.”
“Chase where are you?” The static behind the phone let him know it was Anti and he whimpered.
“You’ll be mad at me...”
“WE’RE ALREADY MAD AT YOU DIPSHIT!” Jackie yelled. Henrik left the phone on the table while he grabbed his shoes and a jacket, figuring that because Chase called him, he should be the one to get him.
Chase suddenly got quiet. “I don’t know.”
“What do you mean you don’t know?” Marvin furrowed his eyebrows.
“I mean I’m lost... that’s why I called... I was at a bar, then tried to walk home and got lost.”
There was silence for a little while. Marvin suddenly stepped towards an open area of floor and started mumbling a spell. “He’s on the corner of Center Street and Behmer Drive. A block down from a bar.” Henrik nodded, grabbing his phone and getting into the car.
“Chase stay on ze phone ja?”
“Okayyyy.” Chase yawned. “Hen I’m tired.”
“Vell I vill not carry vou in so vou need to stay avake”
“But I’m sleepyyyyyyy” Henrik sighed, driving as fast as he could without getting arrested until he saw a familiar figure all the while trying to keep said person awake. He pulled over and got out of the car. Chase stood up, but he stood up too quickly and vomited, luckily for him none of it got on Henrik. As soon as he was done, he was ushered into the car.
“I von’t um... vhat is that expression? Chew vou out now, vou vill certainly get enough shit vrom Jackieboy and Marvin.”
“Thank you,” Chase mumbled, the heat of the car feeling nice on his cold wet body.
“Und vour hangover und sickness vill be more zan enough punishment tomorrow.”
“I’m real sorry Hen.”
“Zat is vhat vou zaid last time. Und vou did it again. Vou must earn mein trust back Chase. Jamie’s too. Und vou vill be lucky if ze ozers trust vou again soon.” All of a sudden, Chase broke into sobs. He thought he didn’t have anymore tears left in him, but apparently he was wrong.
“Please don’t make me see them Hen... I’m just so weak and pathetic and you all are important. All I have is... is... I’m just useless. What have I ever been besides a nuisance? With all my whining about Stacy, over reacting to a couple sad days and calling it depression, my-my bad habits and self destructive tendencies... I’m surprised you all still keep me around,” Chase’s whole body shook with his sobs.
There was a lot to unpack there and Henrik had no clue where to start. He pulled into the driveway and put the car in park, turning to face Chase. “Chase... how long have vou been feeling like zis?”
He just shrugged. “I dunno... a while now, maybe a year or so?”
“Vhy didn’t vou say anyzing?”
“I was scared you would realize your mistake and kick me out.” He mumbled. It was quiet, but Henrik heard it loud and clear.
“Ve vould never dream of it Chase. Vou are far from useless-“
“Oh yeah? Name one thing that I’ve done that actually helped!”
Henrik went silent as his brain tried to think of a good example that wasn’t easily written off because he knew that anything he said would be torn to bits anyway.
“Thought so.” Chase shook his head. “I actually thought you were gonna say something too. Guess I can add moron to the list.”
“Chase stop-“
“Oh look, I’m being a bother yet again. Shocking.” He got out of the car, slamming the door, puked in the grass, then went inside, ready to be reminded yet again of how weak and pathetic he was.
The second he opened the door was the second the yelling began. He didn’t even bother protesting because they were all right. He screwed up, could’ve died, worried them all.
“Do you have ANY idea how scared we were?! I thought I was going to get a call from a hospital that you were hurt or DEAD! We all were so worried-“
“I DIDN’T ASK YOU TO CARE!” Chase snapped.
“WELL SCREW YOU TOO! I’m your brother!” Jackie fired right back.
‘Ok I think that’s enough’ Jameson tried to intervene, but of course, nobody was paying attention to him. Well, nobody except one person who did happen to notice. Anti stepped in between the two.
“That is enough.” His voice caused everyone to stop yelling, Jameson signing a small thank you towards him. “It seems like Chase has already berated himself over and over, haven’t you? I’m not inside your head, chill out, but you’re fucking screaming it with your body language. You seem to forget that you all can’t hide anything from me. And, I can assure you Chase, you aren’t faking anything, and we all would care.
“Don’t you see? Look around you Brody! Jackieboy is yelling at you because he was scared, and cares so damn much about you. Marvin had so much anxious energy that while he was pacing he started to fucking glow. Yes Marvin, I saw that. Jameson wasn’t signing anything, he just retreated into his mind again, like he always does when he’s worried. Henrik was prepping his work station just in case you came home half dead and was shaking so much he dropped half his equipment. And I-” Anti took a deep breath “I was glitching so much I disappeared for a little bit, just static filling my place. I’m still glitching a lot, and it is taking all of my energy to stay present enough to knock some sense into your drunken mind! We care about you because we all have no idea what we would do without you here!” He balled his hands into fists, and stared down Chase, watching him deflate even more than he already was. He shook his head, retreating to his room where he resumed his excessive glitching.
Jameson was the first one to recover. ‘Chase? What did Anti mean about “you aren’t faking anything, and we all would care”?’ When he was met with a blank stare, he sighed and looked to one of the others to translate. Marvin was the one to interpret for Chase.
“I... I had it in my head that... that I was just faking my depression... that I was just sad a bit. And that... that nobody would care if I... if I... tried again.” Everyone in the room but Jameson understood, and Jameson wasn’t quite sure if he wanted to know. His mind supplied an answer and he didn’t like it. Jackie was the one to walk over to Chase and engulf him in a hug. The rest soon followed, and Chase began to cry again into Jackie’s shoulder. After a while they one by one let go, and Chase looked between them all before going to his room and passing out on his bed.
#who cares#kaiden writes#my fanfic#jacksepticeye#chase brody#henrik von schneeplestein#marvin the magnificent#jackieboy man#jameson jackson#antisepticeye#angst#depression#alcoholism#addiction#suicide mention#suicidal thoughts#yall im not dead
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"And Then … "
And then... there are some students who you worry about so much that you don't sleep at night.
And then… You can't calm your mind. You can't slow and pace your breath. Every time you try to count 7-4-8, or was it 8-7-4? …
And then… you get distracted.
And then… you realize you've been holding your breath for too long. All because you can't feel the relief of that exhale until you see him or her at school in the morning... and this exercise is stupid!
And then… you see "your kid" at the lockers, unceremoniously unpacking his or her bookbag. Your kid made it through another night!
And then… You are so relieved... that you rediscover what it feels like to drop your shoulders and unclench your jaw. You feel like you can finally fall asleep in peace.
And then... and then …
... your day truly begins. You have 6 classes to teach, a lunchtime bake sale to supervise, an "essential meeting" to make on your only off period, and a recess duty to perform.
And then... You have copies to run, and coffee to brew, and coworkers to remind, "Don't eat the kids for lunch. "
And then... "Holy S***! I NEED TO PEE!"
Then… and then … it's the end of the day.
And then … But then… Wait! You have a Student Council meeting to moderate, and individual tutoring until 5:00 pm (which we all know means AT LEAST 5:30 at a minimum) on a subject you don't even teach!
And then… you finally go home. And just when you feel like passing out, you remember that you forgot to eat lunch. So you better make dinner.
And then … you eat Ramen with egg (pretending it's enough protein) and begin to catch up on grading.
And then … you review your lesson plans for tomorrow. Making sure they make sense and are appropriate, making changes for the current learning styles of your class, and willing with every ounce of you left... that they give enough significance and reverence to the topic at hand. With all the weight and conviction it is due.
And then… if time and your body permit… you shower.
And then … you lay down.
And then … you wonder if "that kid" will be in school tomorrow.
And then … you think about how you didn't get a chance to sew up the patches in his or her sweater.
And then … you wonder what was eaten, or even if he or she had dinner.
And then … you completely sit up and turn on the light and write on the post-it notes you strategically placed on your nightstand, "Buy more granola bars " exclamation point, exclamation point. FUCKING EXCLAMATION POINT (with the huge punctuation marks and all).
And then … you decide to do more tomorrow. You will be better tomorrow. You will manage your time better tomorrow.
And then ...
And then …
You forget how to count to 8, or 7, or 4...
And thats when... you remember "that kid."
And then... you dream of being swallowed by the holes in sweaters.
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It’s hard to stay away, huh? I did turn off my notifications on twitter but I still peeked. Why are y’all so amazing to me? What did I do to deserve this love? This community?
Since y’all have been there for me ever since my mom passed three years ago, I’d do anything for y’all. I felt I did let y’all down because I’m a content creator and haven’t done anything in so long. It sucks because I’m yearning to do so but lack the time due to now being an adult, working a grueling adult job and living with family.
I believe I will be able to get a place of my own later in the year, I’m really hoping for that. As for my full time job, I’m actively looking for another one. The one I’m at, I feel I work so hard but I’m not appreciated enough. It’s a healthcare industry and I work hard to help people with their needs while management focuses on metrics and numbers. I wanna get out of there.
I haven’t had time to myself and just be selfish for once? So I’m glad I was able to take time off to have a pretty long weekend to enjoy Sizecon 2020 and spend time with friends.
Let’s get started on the recap, shall we? Bare with me, I talk a lot (and not well might I add).
Day 1: Thursday 2/13/20
I woke up at 4 am to catch my flight that leaves at 6:45 am. I thankfully had all my bags packed, I just needed to shower and be ready. My dad took me to the airport and wished me off. At this point, I had plenty of time, even seeing the long TSA line at the Houston airport. I had internally groaned a lot but managed through. After having some minutes to spare, I grabbed a quick bite to eat at one of the dining places, a lovely breakfast bowl that I can have (those of you who don’t know me, I have celiac disease and I have to eat gluten free). Jumped on my flight and comfortably slept in my seat on the plane. The plan was to have a connecting flight to Charlotte, NC and then to Newark, NJ.
Two hours later, I woke up to not at my destination but at Colombia, SC. Apparently, while I was asleep, they had to divert us to the next airport because the weather was really bad in NC. We had two options: stay on the plane and wait it out until we’re back in the air to NC, or get off the plane and figure out another alternative. I stayed, I had plenty of time until my connecting flight was scheduled (which I actually got alerts that it ending up delaying a lot) so I stayed in my seat and watched greys anatomy. About almost an hour passed and we’re finally back up in the air, with more space to breathe since there were people that did leave the plane. Landed safely in NC and I ventured off to find snacks and wait at my gate. It kept delaying but I finally was able to get on my flight to NJ, making my total time at the airport and in the air...all day, I can’t do math lol. I safely landed in NJ at 5:30 pm, I had been awake since 4 am. It was a day.
Yo, I’m gonna get him and his wife a gift, I swear to god, but DJ (aka Giantgripper) saved me by picking me up from the airport and letting me stay the night at his place. When he’s the host, he does one heck of a job as a host. Since I hadn’t eaten a proper meal since 5 in the morning or so, DJ took me to a Mediterranean little mom and pop restaurant that I fell in love with. Had a stuffed pepper and practically cleaned everything off my plate. After we ate, I accompanied DJ while he did some errands for extra things he needed for the con (which did include articles of clothing for the giant cafe lol). I was happy to help as much as I could. After that, we made it back to his place. Once his wife Adri (chibiana) came home from work, we watched a documentary while trying (and failing with me because I’m a turd) to make different mixed drinks to taste. I ended up going with hot chocolate, I’m a simpleton when it comes to alcohol. A little bit afterwards, I had to pass out, it was a long ass day.
Day 2: Friday 2/14/20
Valentine’s was just another day for me. Woke up, got dressed, and DJ surprised me with a fresh homemade breakfast. It was magnificent, I scrapped the plate then too. Plans for the day was to get allllllll the stuff we need and travel to the hotel, which apparently was an hour and a half away from DJ’s house I believe. Adri had to go do another thing for work and was gonna meet up later. DJ and I traveled to the hotel first. I passed out again in the car, I was so exhausted from before I guess it had hit me again.
We made it to the hotel and unpacked the car with my stuff, his and Adri’s bags, and things for the con. I got to say quick hellos to people I knew that were already there (gave a big ass hug to Miss Kaneda, she’s so precious and a big hug to IamFilledwithStatic). I was going to be sharing a room with shortmarcy, Morgana (Moe), and Guiri. So since I had arrived first, I will check in first; Morgana and Guiri were still flying from Spain and shortmarcy didn’t come until the next morning. Since it was under shortmarcy’s name and the deposit was paid under her, She had to call to have the hotel let me check in for her. In turn, I had to put my card on file. I thought I was being a responsible adult and I thought it was gonna charge like half of the charge or something but...they charged the full price of the hotel. Which was $503...which was basically everything in my bank account. I didn’t know that was gonna happen, I panicked and just sat on the couch outside of the con area while Robyn (goddess-rei) comforted me. I had to come to terms that shit happens and I had no money for the weekend. But I graciously had the best of friends this weekend, I’ll get to that in a sec.
After my bumming out, I changed to put on my blouse for the valentines banquet (one of my guaranteed dinners that night lol). I met up with Morgana and Guiri and also sillylilbug (she’s so adorably sweet). We had our own table along with my friend Joe (CaptainRandGTS, who is a phenomenal photographer btw). We ate some good food and they took account of my gluten free (however I think the chimichurri steak may have upset my stomach). I said goodnight and went to my room to basically turn the bathroom up XD I had changed into my pajamas to head downstairs to get water and pain medicine when I turned the corner and saw a group of people walking down the hall. Guys, I’m still getting used to this, but the group was like, “Is that Vicki?!” “That is her!” And I was like WHAT. It was my lovely friends sviolet, mansquishers, mister finch, Joseph moestar, and Strongshadow2018. I was so surprised and honored, I was gushing. I got to hang out with them in their hotel room for a bit, played cards against humanity (I WON!) and ate ridiculously delicious gluten free cookies misterfinch made.
Day 3: Saturday 2/15/20
Con day. This day was a bit of a blur honestly (my mind is not the same people) but I know I took this day to “try” and relax. I was still bummed about my money problem but I had enough to buy the breakfast buffet meal ticket. My idea was to chow down a lot of food (since it was a buffet) so I won’t ask for food but that did not happen because I have wonderful friends?? Towards noon, I went to ihop with my crew (we called each other the sizecon crew lol) with sviolet, mansquishers, mister finch, Joseph moestar, and strongshadow2018. We had a nice time and I was so grateful for the lunch! Once we headed back to the hotel, we split up to do more con shenanigans. I met so many people, it was amazing. People I already knew and new people as well. It was awesome to match names to faces, it was so cool. I’m telling you though, my mind is not the same so I can’t list out the whole list of everyone I’ve seen. Then I got to see my good friend Steve (Miles Striker). I’m so fucking proud of this dude. He showed me a film he wrote, recorded, and edited all by himself, it was mindblowing. We had to go back downstairs after that because I forgot I had a social to lead and he had panels to go to. I stopped by the giant cafe, that was fucking wild. I ran the Fluffy Feels Social and I did my best because I’ve never ran something like that. But I’m glad we all liked the same thing and we just kept talking! It was getting late to when the Playroom was gonna start, so I headed back upstairs. Chilled a bit more with my crew and then headed back downstairs. I don’t know what got over me, but I gathered enough courage and joined the nude swimming party. I cannot believe I did that, that was a big step for me. Kinda sucked getting out though because I didn’t have extra clothes and it was fucking cold.
Day 4: Sunday 2/16/20
Technically last day of the con but it was the busiest. I spent all morning practicing my skit for the Tiny Cafe. I was nervous and pacing around in my hotel room, making sure I get it right. Around 12:30, I headed down to meet up with the rest of the cafe to get ready when we start at 1 pm. I could not describe how nervous I was. I wanted to make sure I didn’t mess up and I know I was lip syncing (graciously provided by Anoka’s vocals) I was still nervous as fuck. This was a performance and I’m now more confident talking to others about my kink/aesthetics but performing? Oh lawd. We had a big crowd apparently, I was surprised. We had to get more chairs and apparently turn people away? THAT MADE MY NERVES SKYROCKET. The cafe starts with a wonderful performance by Adri (Chibiana) then followed by cute transitions from our servers mini-moo and shortmarcy. Then it’s time for our skit: Veronica (Jitensha), me, and Aim were shrunk and sung songs about our giants. I was first (omg) and mine was in the style of “Maria” from west side story (Veronica called it Shrunken side story). I was shaking like a leaf and tried my best to get through the whole song while doing silly quirks of mine. Once that was done, I rushed back from my spot XD it was Veronica’s turn to sing about a giant dick lol and Aim serenading a giant lady. After our skit, it was the grand finale of Morgana performing a dance in a giant hamster ball. It was incredible. Despite my anxiety, I’m glad I did this and we did so amazing (we made tips!!!!).
Right after that was done, I had to rush to lead a social of Giant men and Tiny women. It was a small turnout but we still got people and we talked a lot. When that was done, I rushed to be on my first panel of the day: Owning what you love. After that was the Macrophile panel and then after that was the Diversity panel. I was on all of them and they were back to back, I was a busy lady lol. After that panel, I was free! Since I made tips from the cafe and I was broke from the hotel, I got to buy a few things in the vendor hall. Was able to say hi to some people I knew like scridam, the reducer, miss kaneda, iamfilledwithstatic, robclassact, and aborigen. It was also mister finch’s birthday so since I was free for the night, I went with the crew to go celebrate at a restaurant. That was such a nice time, I swear everything I did this weekend I wanted to experience again. When we came back to the hotel after dinner (after a quick stop to the liquor store lol), I was able to make it in time for the closing ceremony. Hearing everyone’s words touched my heart and reminded me why I love this community. So I was able to give a speech to say that; this is my second home when I lost my only home when my mom passed. God, that room was filled with so much love. I went back upstairs and hung out more with the crew and watched Promare (pretty sick movie). I was gonna head to bed but I hung out more with Steve and we watched a movie before passing out.
Day 5: Monday 2/17/20
It was time to say all of my goodbyes to everyone that had to leave. I gave so many hugs and love, I just miss them all. Most of the crew had to head out, except for sviolet, she had her flight in the afternoon. So we went out to breakfast at a Mexican restaurant, reminiscing this whole weekend. We came back to the hotel to chill in my hotel room. Morgana and Guiri were leaving to the airport back to Spain and shortmarcy wanted to venture to NYC before she went home the next day. So sviolet and I chilled in my room before she had to head out.
Then for the rest of the evening, I had the room to myself. I watched law and order svu whole packing and double checked I had everything. I waited up for shortmarcy to come back (I was so worried) but she made it back after 10 pm safe and sound. At that point, I had to go to bed because my flight in the morning was at 5:45 am.
Day 6: Tuesday 2/18/20
I woke up at 3 am to get to the airport on time and my Lyft driver I got...I had a feeling he was having a bit of fun by himself before he picked me up. Because it stunk in the car of cum. Whatever, I held in my breath and made it to the airport safely. My flights were on time and I slept on each one. I did not want to go back home.
Back to reality and I hate the after con blues! Especially with how much this con and community means to me.
Hoping there’s a next year and I’m ready to help as usual.
Y’all have a goodnight ❤️
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180906 LY Tour: D-4
this is gonna be really long, feel free to ignore! it’s mainly for myself!
my friend and i got to la on wednesday (9/5) the day before our concert and lined up at about 7:30 pm to set up camp. we had small folding chairs and 2 blankets, a cooler, our bags of clothes, and a bag of extra snacks. not too long after arriving, 2 girls came down the line to give us our numbers (which they wrote on our hands) and to write our names and numbers in their notebook. i was number 382. the girl behind us in line arrived at the same time and was really cool and experienced with kpop concerts and told us what kind of things to expect and stuff. we were really thankful for her lmao. i still had a cold and i called my parents to bring me some cold medicine as well as some sweaters for me and my friend because it got cold pretty fast and we were not dressed for that weather at all. for a few hours we just sat and talked with the girl and she told us about how she saw SHINee and all these other groups. at 12 am we tried for an hour to sleep but to no avail.
some more time passed and it continued to get colder and girls continued to pull up in cars to go and line up at the back. our spot in line was a cockroach attraction and idk how many times my friend and i threw our blankets off to stand up because of roaches. the korean lady next to us in line took bug spray out and tried to help us a bunch. she was rly sweet and cute. at 2 am i had to pee so we walked to the bathroom everyone was using which was decently far away and on the way back we saw girls doing choreo out in the blocked off street to pass time. it was really cute and i wanted to join but i was too shy ndkfndnd. it was rly crackhead hours tho. anyone who wasnt asleep was losing their minds bc we hadnt slept and we knew we were gonna be awake for a long long time. couple more hours passed and my friend and i managed to sleep for 10-45 minutes sometime between 4 and 5 am. we forced ourselves to drink some small protein drinks and then when the sun came up at 6 am, some workers showed up in trucks and began building a fence around us campers. we guessed it was to block us off from the streets
a few more hours passed of trying to squeeze some more sleep in and failing to do so. at 9 am we walked to the bathroom to get dressed because it was getting really close to wristband time and i forgot to take my toothbrush, makeup and deodorant to the bathroom with me and ended up having to do it all in line which was a tad embarrassing but it was fine. then near 10 am the line suddenly began to pack up and move forward and we panicked bc we had too much stuff and the mini-cooler was rather heavy. we made it really far up in line before my parents showed up to pick the stuff up. but it was reallyreally hard to get the stuff to a place where they would be able to pick it up. we had to ask the girl behind us to hold our spot while we carried everything down the line and across the street to where my parents could easily pull over and grab it up. that was extremely hard. then complications happened with the line where people had crowded to the front of the line, making a mess to where the staff couldnt bring us in.
so, a girl came down the line to tell us all to move back in order to make room at the front of the line, all the while groups of girls were being sent to the back of the line for crowding and the rest of us were able to move into a more orderly line.
at 10:30 they began pulling us in 10 people at a time to line up for our wristbands! once we got in we were put into this metal fencing where we waited as they handed out our ga wristbands that had our numbers on them.
because of the crowding that had happened, my number was now 410. after getting our wristbands it was about and we were allowed to leave and told to come back at 4:30 pm to form the official line. so we went to get our merch which had a line that wrapped around the block and we waited in that line for about 3 hours, which sucked. it was hot and the line was ridiculously long and i kept squatting in line to stretch my back out and to give my feet a break. my friend looked like she wanted to die in that line ndjdndn. once we finally got our merch, i gave up on going to the bts studio bc i didnt wanna wait in another line.
(i bought the jimin premium photo, the jimin picket, and the tour jacket 😣💓)
i called my parents and had them pick us up and take us to our hotel so we could get some sleep in before the concert. we slept until 2:45, woke up, picked up food, and then went back to staples to sit and eat on the ground somewhere before going to the ga line again. at 4:30 they let us all in and called up groups of 100 at a time based on numbers (ex: “numbers 1-100 line up” and got us situated in numerical order.
everyone 500 and under had to wait for us before they could start lining up. we sat in that line for about 2 hrs while soundcheck went in and came back out. and as 6 pm came closer a security guard kept messing with us by announcing how many minutes were left before we’d be allowed inside and we’d scream every time djkddnjdj. they finally began letting us in and we had to line up at different doors with metal detectors and get our bags checked. the girl in front of me in line was told to put her pride flag in her bag because it was too big to hold up at the show /: then we crossed to a table where we got our entrance wristbands and we flocked into the venue to secure our spots on the GA floor. we had to stand there for 2 hours until showtime and it was so painful bc our feet and backs were killing us after standing for nearly the entire day but the bts mv’s they played made it a little easier as the venue filled up around us
the people in the higher sections began syncing their army bombs and my friend and i fussed over our own and couldnt figure out why it wasnt working until a girl told us what we werent doing and we fixed it djkddknf then the lights got darker and darker and an intro video began to play on the big screens and everyone lost their fucking minds and then idol began to play and bts was right! there!! on the main stage and it was like i was in a dream. 😞 when they came to the mini stage all breath left my lungs , i
overall the experience was stressful, painful, exhausting, sweaty, and emotionally draining but it was easily the best night of my life and id do it all again in a heartbeat. they were beyond incredible and im immensely proud to be a fan of bts. 😔💗
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BTS LY 10/3 GA EXPERIENCE
I was in the GA for the October 3rd BTS Love Yourself Tour in Chicago at the United Center and I want to document my experience not only for myself, but because I want to help other people who are debating about possibly doing GA in the future. If you don’t want details, Skip to the very end…
Let me start by saying that if you ever get the chance to do it you seriously SHOULD. What I’m about to talk about sounds like a lot and there were dozens of moments I thought “what did we do?!?!?” but I have to say, the moment a member is 7 feet in front of you NOTHING ELSE MATTERS! Not recording. Not how much your feet hurt. Not the ARMY BOMB by you ear. NOTHING. It’s incredible. So now that I have that out of the way let me tell you about my experience.
I was 10000% lucky and I managed to get 5 GA tickets on May 5, the day they came out, within 10 minutes of the sale starting. My mom’s iPad saved my life where 5 laptops could not. I’d never bought tickets before so I was nervous as hell and was on my phone with my friend, http://dingdangdiggity.tumblr.com/, starting 2 hours before hand and I NEVER let the screens go dark. It was tense and the fact I got it never registered until a month later.
Oct 2, Britt and her sister, Val ( http://missvalerieann5.tumblr.com/ ) came up and spent the night since I’m not far from Chicago and they are. Oct 3, we were up at 4. I am not a Chicago driver and I wanted to beat traffic and I mean, GA line am I right??? So friend number 3, Jax https://average-jax.tumblr.com/ , comes over because she lives near me and we head up, stopping on the way to pick up our newest edition to the friendship, Megan https://warmyoon.tumblr.com/ and we are off.
Now parking was supposed to be weird. Rumor was lots opened at 10 and we were getting there at 7:30 so the day before I used Spothero to get a spot in a garage 15 mins from the UC. I had planned to move the car to a closer lot when it opened but chose instead to extend the time where it was from 6pm-12am for another $5 so in the end parking was a 15 min walk down the street for $20 instead of the $25-29 they were charging at the venue. Plus it was going around lot C would open at 8am and other would open at 5pm and like no I was not fucking around with that.
So we did end up in the merch line on accident before we realized GA was on the other side of the building. Even with wasting a half hour though, it wasn’t a hug issue since we saw people who passed us in merch were only like 2 people ahead of us when we got in GA. Now here’s the thing with GA. People camp out. In this case, they started camping Friday for Tuesday’s concert as well as Wednesday. Some of them did both concerts some just did one. Either way, people were annoyed. The venue said they would honor the unofficial line, since official started at 10 am on D-day, if everyone was organized. So they handed out unofficial bands with numbers until they could get the official ones. Let’s just say after waking up at 4am, I didn’t give a single shit where I was in line and it was like 8 am and I had to pee so fucking bad. So Jax, Britt and I walked the length of the line towards the building because rumor on Twitter was security was letting us use the bathrooms inside. Holy. Shit. The tension was insane. These people were so pissed like we got GLARED AT for walking towards the front. I got pissed back and started screaming “I don’t give a shit about your line, I have to fucking pee!” and “I stopped caring about you’re line when I woke up at 4, I have to piss!” I guess some crazy bitch tried yelling at us. Whatever. It was hell up there. People were yelling about not bothering with the numbers since it was’t official and others were all about those numbers. I was happy to be in the back. But yeah, we got to pee and return to the back with the horror stories about the crabby pre-campers.
Val had guessed being 804 which was funny cuz we got #799-803. Rule was be back in order at 4 pm, doors opened at 5:30 and concert at 8. So we had agreed to run straight to the LG experience thing. We wanted to do the thing where the screen shows your bias like they’re next to you so bad, but for Chicago it was a raffle. You either reached in and got the pink ball to do that, a yellow ball to record a message for BTS or a blue ball where you got NOTHING. Rumor is LA let everyone do the picture. So that pissed me off. Other than that, it was still cool to take pics with the cut outs. We checked out merch and saw the line wasn’t terrible so we tried it and yeah a lot was sold out, but it went by so quick compared to the Wings tour in Rosemont. The whole C lot was set up for merch, LG, dancing, and pictures so it felt like a convention and it was really nice.
My biggest advice apart from BRING MONEY is HAVE WATER and make sure you HAVE FOOD. Snacks. Sandwiches. Anything. We had chips and water bottles and decided to walk down 15 mins to the Mcdonalds, which sucked cuz it was 85 degrees and sunny, and when we came back we went right back to where we’d been that morning so it would be quicker to get organized…which was a cluster fuck. Everyone was tired. It was now 5 pm but listen, second biggest advice is DON’T BE A DICK! Seriously. Security wanted single file order and they delayed letting us in because people would rather bitch with the fans trying to help. Rule of thumb, if you’re number 1400, don’t bother standing where the 300s go. Security wanted us in order and they fucking MADE SURE we were so it was pointless to refuse to move to the back cuz you had to wait anyway. So when someone is trying to put 600s here and 700s here and 800s move back, don’t bitch about it. Just fucking do it.
Now this is what you really want to know. Number 800, how close was I. Pretty. Fucking. Close. So the stage has the main stage, a jut out in the middle and then another lengthy stage (you know what I mean). We were off to stage left, audience right at like………if you’re on the farthest jut out in the center, we were on your 9 0’clock. Now I am 5’4” so when they performed songs on the main stage, I couldn’t see shit without being on my tip toes or looking at my camera or the screen. So that did suck. I wish we’d been closer. We were about 5 rows back from the barricade and below will be pics to show you my views. But like…I was 5 feet from every single member at one point. They could see me. They are so fucking handsome. It made the entire experience worth it. Seriously. even with 1400+ people in the pit, it was fantastic. I probably won’t do it again for money, time and stress sake unless a ticket fell into my lap, but it was a wonder thing to do and I suggest it for sure.
Now that you’ve read it all here are my tips for any GA goers:
Get their early if you want first dibs but remember that you’ll still be closer to them than you have ever been before and that once it starts and they move around, you will be shifting constantly throughout the night.
Scout out the area before hand whether you go there and drive around or check it out on Google Maps. Know what kind of food and stores are around and how far of a walk it is.
BRING WATER!!!!! You will need it all day so you don’t faint. I took in an empty bottle and filled it in the bathroom before the show. Not all venues will let you but better to throw away an empty bottle later than to go in and realize you could have had it.
PORTABLE CHARGERS!!!!!!!! Make sure your phone has space and enough charge for the whole day and night without an outlet. We charged ours at MCDonalds. Mine got to 33% by the end and had storage issues so I couldn’t record the end. Everyone else’s died.
Bring FOOD! Anything will do as long as you snack. I don’t eat during events like this but I make myself just in case.
If it’s hot and sunny, bring a cheap umbrella to block the sun and catch any breeze. It was 85 F during the day.
If it’s cold, bring a cheap blanket. It was only 60 F when we got there.
HAVE FUN! Be comfy! Make friends. Ask about biases. Remember there are people there with legit tents. Bring whatever you want as long as you can either throw it away, keep hold of it, or have someone get it for you to take home.
The line goes up and around the corner all the way to the building
So yeah hard to see when they were back there
Joon was by us a lot
Hobi was by us the most
Jimin was apparently checking on a fan who was about to faint.
I didn’t get a lot of Tae, Jin, or Kook but Hobi and Joon were on our side a lot and Jimin and Yoongi bounced around. But yeah...that was my experience.
Any questions?
EDIT: Britt just did this to her’s and I forgot but I put blood, sweat and tears into this pictures so you BETTER CREDIT ME if you share them.
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Girl Next Door chpt. 6
A/N: [’At Last’ by Etta James plays]
Hello friends! Sorry about the wait, I got distracted by canon fanfic! Caroline comes over for a movie night... (me @ me Megan why did you make Dwight a Star Wars nerd you fkn hate Star Wars lmfao)
Dr Dwight Enys’s ears picked up a tapping noise on the door frame. He sat bolt upright and quickly peered around him; he was in his bedroom, his legs dangling off the mattress, fully clothed, with a half-eaten sandwich in his hand.
“What the fu…?” he whispered to himself in groggy confusion. His twelve-hour shift had morphed into an eighteen-hour one as several car crash victims had to be stabilised before surgery, and all nine of them had been rushed in just as he was about to clock off. He had gone to Tesco to pick up a sandwich for lunch on his way home, but he had evidently fallen asleep after two or three bites. He threw the now hard and stale sandwich into the bin, silently lamenting the food waste. The knock on the door came again, though more firmly this time.
He glanced at his alarm clock, which informed him it was 8:17 pm. “Just a minute!” Dwight called as he swapped his smart trousers and shirt for pyjama trousers and a band t-shirt. He walked the short distance from his bedroom to the front door and pulled it open without checking the peephole.
“Caroline!” he said in surprise, his mood instantly picking up. She stood in front of him in pyjamas, her hair worn up in a messy bun, with a Tesco carrier bag in her hand.
She looked him up and down, admiring him in his casual clothes, thinking she’d never seen him in anything other than scrubs or a shirt and tie. “Hi,” Caroline greeted, with a smile forming on her face. “I didn’t wake you, did I?” She bit her lip hesitantly, which Dwight found very distracting.
“No, no,” he lied quickly. They both smiled shyly at one another. “Come in,” Dwight invited, holding the door open for her as she sauntered by him and straight into the living room.
She gracefully sat herself down and waited for him to join her. She cleared her throat slightly. “So, Dr Enys, I thought I would test your theory. I went to Tesco and bought Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens, and it was even on sale!” She pulled the brand-new DVD out of the bag and displayed it.
A confused smile spread across Dwight’s face. “You want to watch Star Wars?”
She shook her head. “No, you see, I don’t want to watch Star Wars. What I want to do is prove you wrong by getting to see how truly shit it is for myself,” she explained, her light eyebrows raised in their usual taunting way.
Dwight ripped the plastic wrapping off the DVD cover and opened it. “You’re on.”
About halfway through the film, Caroline’s stomach began to whine loudly, so much so that Dwight paused the movie, shooting her a somewhat concerned glance. “Are you okay?”
Her cheeks reddened slightly. “Yeah, I’m fine. I guess I just kind of forgot to eat dinner,” she laughed, hiding her face behind her hand. She had been working all day; the café hosted a kids’ birthday party from 4 pm until 7:30 pm and she had been so excited all day to show Dwight the DVD that she went straight from her flat to his after she’d gotten changed from work earlier.
“Me too,” he admitted sheepishly. How were they both adults? Dwight reached for his phone, a brilliant idea forming in his head. “Dominos,” he sang, opening up the app and immediately placing his saved favourite pizza into the basket. He handed Caroline his phone. “Here, pick whatever you want.”
She accepted the phone with slight hesitation. “Are you sure? These look expensive.”
“Nah, it’s fine. It’s 2 for Tuesdays anyway,” he explained.
Caroline furrowed her brows. “What’s that?”
“What do you mean?” Dwight asked her incredulously as if everyone in the entire world should know of the famous buy-one-get-one-free pizza chain deal. “You’ve never had a 2 for Tuesdays?”
“I’ve never had a Dominos,” she admitted somewhat shyly. “It may surprise you to know that I don’t actually eat fast food very often.”
Dwight looked her slim frame up and down. “Oh, right,” he chuckled. “Well, still, you need to eat something,” he insisted.
“If I get this pizza with all the vegetables on it that still counts as being healthy, right, Dr Enys?”
Dwight’s laugh bounced off the walls of his flat. “I have done that myself more times than I care to admit!”
Caroline fiddled with his phone for another moment and then handed it back to him with an amused smile. He placed their ordered and swore at his iPhone when the estimated delivery time said 65 minutes. It was Tuesday, though. But still.
By the time the seventh Star Wars movie was over, there was still no sign of their pizzas, but the film had gotten quite exciting and so both of them had been suitably distracted from their hunger pangs.
After humming along to the theme tune for at least ten seconds, Dwight pressed stop on the film. “So, Miss Penvenen,” Caroline’s mouth twisted at the use of her formal name, “What did you think?”
She briefly hummed in consideration, fiddling with some loose bits of hair that had fallen out of her messy bun. “It was good. I liked it,” she lied. Dwight saw through this and raised his eyebrows in disbelief. Caroline scrunched her face at him. “Well, I liked your enthusiasm – very much so,” she amended with a small smile, having enjoyed watching Dwight watch the movie more than watching the actual thing itself.
Dwight smiled in return, and before he could even filter the words through his tired brain, he whispered, “I like you very much, too.”
Caroline, for once in her life, was utterly tongue-tied. Not able to think of anything to say, she – for some unbeknownst reason – leaned over and kissed him. Dwight responded eagerly, gently cupping her face with his hand. Just as Caroline had deepened the kiss and placed her hand on his chest, the door buzzer hissed loudly. They broke apart instantly, and stared at each other, both somewhat breathless. The air in the room crackled around them.
Caroline blinked, not quite sure what was going on. The door buzzer rang three times this time, the delivery driver obviously impatient. “Oh! That must be the pizza; I’ll get it!” She practically fell off the sofa in her bid to retrieve their takeaway, or rather, in her bid to escape the situation she had now landed herself in. Sure, she didn’t mind kissing Dwight. It was nice. More than nice. But it’s not like she’d been lying awake at night thinking about doing it since their night out several months ago. Pffft.
As soon as Caroline turned her back to answer the door, Dwight could hear Ross Poldark’s voice in his head yelling ‘who gives a fuck about the pizza? Why didn’t you stop her?’ and calling him a twat amongst other profanties. Did that really just happen? Had she really just kissed him? He wiped his face and took a gulp from his glass of water, hoping it would cool his body heat.
When she returned, balancing their pizzas on her palms, Dwight held up his Star Wars DVD boxset to her. He cleared his throat awkwardly. “Do you want to watch one of the originals? I already have all of them, obviously.”
Caroline placed the pizzas down on the table and firmly shook her head. “No, because then you’ll really have to go and buy an Ouija board to communicate with me because I’ll die of boredom!” She snapped her fingers, an idea coming into her head. “Ooh let’s watch Titanic instead, I’ve not seen it for ages!”
Dwight’s cackle at her clever joke quickly morphed into an exasperated groan. “Oh, my god, you are such a girl!” He took three large bites of pizza to give him enough energy to spend the next three hours of his life watching a chick flick, as though he hadn’t already seen this movie – and cried watching it – about half a dozen times.
Caroline, too, took a bite of her vegetable-laden pizza. “Well, with your caramel mochas you’re already halfway there yourself!” She covered her mouth with her hand so that her half-chewed bite of pizza wouldn’t become exposed as she laughed at him.
“Oh, will you just let that go?” he whined as he polished off another slice. He didn’t realise how hungry he was.
She grinned at him, pizza sauce around the edges of her lips. “Never!”
Dwight inhaled another slice of pizza, finishing it in just four bites, and closed the lid of his pizza box. He sank back into the sofa and selected Titanic on Netflix as per Caroline’s request. “Fine. But shut up now, your shitty romance film is starting,” he teased, nudging her arm with his own.
Caroline nudged him back and abandoned her pizza; sweeping her feet up onto the couch and involuntary leaning into Dwight’s side. “Oh, my god, I’m already going to cry, I swear. The real footage gets me every time!”
Dwight automatically wrapped his arm around her shoulder, as he had done many times before when comforting a patient or one of their family members. “Awww,” he chuckled, finding her shining, sympathetic eyes adorable, “it’s alright.” His hand froze momentarily in panic as he realised what he’d done. He resumed gently stroking the area with his thumb and rejoiced when she didn’t pull away or question it. If anything, he swore he felt her lean in closer.
They sat in comfortable silence as the characters discussed ‘The Heart of the Ocean’ necklace. Caroline said after a while: “You know, I never cared for that necklace. It’s too big; it looks kind of awkward. But I’ve always wanted one of those big, beautiful hats that Kate Winslet wears in this movie. It would be so cool to walk around wearing one!”
Dwight couldn’t help but smile at the animation in her voice. “I’ve always kind of wanted to wear trousers with braces, why we did ever stop dressing like that?” He wondered out loud. “Everyone looks so smart - even the poor people!”
She examined him up and down, her close proximity and scrutinising gaze made him feel somewhat nervous. “Hmm. You’d suit braces; you should buy some,” she told him with a seemingly noncommittal shrug while she tried to rid her mind of the image of Dwight in smart trousers with braces.
“Maybe I will.” He flashed a smile at her before returning his focus to the movie with a certain degree of difficulty. He hesitated slightly but ultimately felt the thing had to be said, “You know, I actually really fucking hate the start of this movie. Can we just skip ahead until we get to the flashback?”
She let out an excited gasp, jumped out of the grip of his arm and then hit the limb repeatedly in agreement. “Oh, my God, yes! Thank you! No one ever understands when I say that!”
Satisfied, he fast-forwarded the film to Kate Winslet’s first appearance in the movie. He placed the remote control on his somewhat untidy coffee table before clutching his calf muscle. “Ow, ow, shit! Cramp. Ow. Shit. My leg. Ow.” He hissed and rubbed the offending muscle and removed his legs from where they were resting casually on the table.
Caroline looked at him in alarm. “Uh, here, rest your legs on the sofa.” She shuffled away from him slightly, much to his dismay.
He held up his hand to dismiss her worry. “No, no, it’s fine. My legs are too long anyway, they’ll take up the whole couch, and you’ll have nowhere to sit!” He huffed a laugh.
She considered this for a moment, biting the inside of her cheek. “Well, why don’t we lie down? Then there’ll be room for both of us,” she offered lightly, despite the ongoing calculations in her head.
Dwight blushed and prayed that his flat was dark enough to disguise it. “Sure, why not?”
Caroline casually lay on her side in front of Dwight, and as he resumed the movie and put the remote control back on the coffee table, Caroline gently caught his arm and held it across her mid-rift. She was quite impressed by her boldness.
Dwight was completely tongue-tied but thankfully the poker scene – one of his favourites – was on and so he had something to focus on other than the fact he had his arm around Caroline, and that she had put it there herself. And here he was, a twenty-eight-year-old man, with his heart racing like a fourteen-year-old boy.
‘Somebody’s life’s about to change – Fabrizio?’
‘Niente.’
“Niente,” Dwight and Caroline repeated simultaneously, causing them both to giggle.
“Nice Italian accent,” Dwight complimented.
Caroline looked over her shoulder, an amused smile on her face. “I was just about to say the same thing to you, Dr Enys.”
She shivered as she moved, and Dwight frowned at the goose-bumps that formed on her arms. “Oh, are you cold?”
She laughed slightly. “Yeah, a little. Could you grab my bag so that I can get my blanket? I think it’s just at your feet.”
Dwight’s face scrunched in confusion, and he breathed a laugh. “You brought a blanket over?” She sat up and looked at him as though bringing a blanket everywhere was the most everyday thing a person could do. “Why?” he asked as he passed her the reusable bag-for-life.
“Do you have a blanket?” she asked in return as she accepted the proffered bag.
Dwight opened and closed his mouth. “Well, no, but–”
“Exactly,” she gloated with a smile, tugging the large, fleecy pink cover out of the bag. She settled back onto the sofa and began unfolding it; pausing to take Dwight’s hand and rest it where it had previously been, motioning for him to lie back down.
Dwight obliged without complaint, and slightly tightened his hold on her. He could only see the back of her head, but he swore he felt her smile.
He sighed happily, relaxing into their position. Caroline wordlessly flung some extra blanket over her shoulder to ensure Dwight had enough. He didn’t want to think about how much of Horace’s hair was probably on it, but he wrapped it over his shoulder anyway. It was very fluffy.
Too fluffy, in fact, he realised when he woke up on the couch four hours later, with the DVD menu playing in a continuous loop. Caroline was fast asleep; her eyelashes fanned out above her cheekbones, her lips parted as she breathed quietly.
Should he wake her? He really should wake her, right? But she looked so peaceful – and annoyingly beautiful. Plus, she might be mad if he woke her up. She definitely seemed like the type of person to be annoyed if anyone disturbed their sleep. Yeah, he would just leave her. He glanced at the clock on the wall which told him it was 4 am. He didn’t know if she was working later, so he held his breath and gently sat up, reaching over her to get his phone on the coffee table. Miraculously, she didn’t seem to register that he’d moved at all. Despite the light of his mobile phone initially assaulting his retinas and making him momentarily blind, he managed to set an alarm for 6 am, which would give her enough time to get ready if she had a shift in the morning. Satisfied, he put his phone back down and slowly resumed his position on the couch, pausing to turn the TV off which then plunged the room into darkness.
The change of lighting seemed to rouse Caroline, and she stirred her legs. Dwight carefully shuffled a bit so that he was lying down again. Caroline turned over and slid an arm over Dwight’s torso, before gently resting her head on his chest. “Mm, night,” she mumbled, still mostly asleep.
What was going on? Was he dreaming? He would have to ask Demelza about this on Sunday; maybe she could give him some advice. But for now, he was going to go back to sleep. And cuddle into Caroline, that too.
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Lipstick Stains and Photos of You
Description: Bill wants to capture the intimate moments between you two with his favorite polaroid camera.
Author’s Note: I know this probably sucks but I will be writing better stuff during Christmas break because college is kicking my ass right now.
Warnings: daddy kink, dom!bill, swearing, smut
It was around 4:30 pm when Bill had gotten home from one of his film classes. He found you cooking in the kitchen while you were swaying and lip syncing along to “Faded Heart” by BØRNS. Bill laughed at the sight of you,
“Hey Y/N, how was your day?”
You pecked his soft lips before returning back to stir the pot on the stove,
“It was good. My professor let us out early so I had time to clean up the apartment some and cook us this fucking delicious meal were about to have. How about you?”
He took his black messenger back off his shoulder and took out his video camera.
“My day was fine, I got assigned a project in film class today though. Were supposed to make a short film about anything we want, yet I have no fucking clue what I plan to do,” he said taking a sip of the warm vegetable soup you had in the pot.
“You could make it about me!” you said jokingly.
Bill laughed as his eyes wandered down and he stopped when he realized that you were wearing one of shirts. However, what intrigued him about this was the fact you weren’t wearing bottoms underneath the shirt, but instead just a pair of black polka dot panties. Every time you would reach up to one of the cabinets, or over the stove, the shirt would hike up a little displaying your cute panties. An idea then sparked in his head.
***
Dinner was finished and you were rinsing your dish out in the sink when two lanky arms wrapped around your waist. You fell back into Bill’s touch as he began to pepper your neck in kisses. Then, just like that, his grip tightened on your hips,
“Now listen here baby doll, Daddy wants you to go upstairs and put on your favorite lingerie and get all pretty for me. I’ll be up in 15 minutes and I better see you on that bed when I come in. Got it?”
“Yes Daddy,” you breathed.
He let you go and you made your way upstairs to your closet. You decided on the royal blue baby doll nightie you had. It was sheer and cascaded against your body so beautifully when you moved and….it was one of Bill’s favorites on you. You touched up your hair a little before rushing over to the bed. It was a few minutes later that he finally walked in. He moaned at the sight of you as he made his way over. He wrapped his arms around you kissing down your neck and collarbones,
“You look so fucking pretty baby, and smell so fucking sweet, I could just eat you up.”
“Why don’t you Daddy?” you said innocently batting your eyelashes at him.
He chuckled and walked away from you stepping outside the bedroom again. You were confused when he walked in hiding something behind his back, “Baby, I’ve got a surprise for you tonight. If you don’t like it then we won’t do it, but I think you’ll really enjoy this.” He pulled out his old polaroid camera.
“Your little joke about being in my short film gave me an idea. If you’re up to it, I wanna take some intimate photos of you tonight.”
Your face grew warm as you began to feel both flustered and very turned on, “
“Yes Daddy, let’s do it.”
He smirked as he began to fiddle with his camera,
“Now, I want you to lay against the pillows and spread your legs for me Angel. I want to see your pretty little pussy for this first shot.”
You did as he said and spread your legs giving a sultry look to the camera,
*SNAP*
“Perfect baby,” he said as he prepared the camera for another picture. “Now, start playing with your clit until I tell you to stick two fingers in your pussy. Don’t you fucking dare think about cumming without permission either.” `
You began to rub your clit feeling the slickness of your folds from already being turned on earlier. Bill had an obvious hard on pressed up against his dark skinny jeans as he rubbed his hand against it.
“Oh D-Daddy can you finger fuck me instead? Nothing compares to how you do it,” you asked twisting your eyes shut as you started rubbing faster against your clit.
*SNAP*
“Yes, only because my kitten is doing such a good job,” he said.
He walked over and stuck two of his fingers in your mouth and let you suck on them which only ensued another picture.
*SNAP*
He stuck his middle finger in first and soon after his ring finger. He began doing the c’mere motions causing you to writhe and gasp. He was so entranced by you he almost forgot he was supposed to be taking pictures of you. He quickly grabbed his camera with his free hand and snapped another picture of you moaning in pleasure.
*SNAP*
“N-No more photos Daddy please. Just need your cock in me,” you said.
Bill quickly set the camera on the table and removed his fingers from you as you let out a whimper from the loss. He quickly stripped off his sweater, jeans, and underwear and crawled back towards you on the bed.
“You’re so fucking beautiful Y/N” he said, ravaging your body in kisses. Your own red lipstick was marked up all over his neck and face and you made a mental note to take a picture of that later.
He slid into you with ease and began thrusting into you. His mouth pressing into yours for a hardening kiss as you moaned into each other’s mouths.
“Is this what you wanted baby? Is daddy making you feel good?” he asked. You let out the most pornographic moan which only made him quicken his pace.
Your legs were shaking and you were going to reach your climax soon and he knew it.
“Are you about to cum baby? Go ahead and cum all over daddy’s cock like a good girl” he said snaking his hand down to rub furiously against your clit.
“F-Fuck Bill!” you screamed as the waves of your orgasm tore through your body which shortly led to his orgasm. He collapsed next to you on the bed after pulling out. The whole room was silent besides the sound of your heavy breathing. He pulled you into his chest and kissed your head. Remembering the mental note you made, you reached over and grabbed the camera snapping the picture of him covered in your lipstick marks.
“I cannot wait to get these printed,” you said giving his lips a peck with a sly smile.
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ALL OF THEM ~~~~~~~
1: The last person you kissed screams they love you, you say…It really depends who the person Is lol, I haven’t kissed anyone in a long time and the last person wasn’t so great so I would kindly reject them ://
2: Did you get to sleep in today?
FUCK YES I SLEPT UNTIL 1:30 PM
3: You never know what you got until you lose it?
It throws a lot into perspective. There’s a lot people take for granted and once you loose it you don’t realize until it’s gone and you can’t get it back.
4: Do you have siblings?
An older brother whose 9 years apart from me named Chris.
5: How many kids do you want?
2 probably, both more likely adopted.
6: Who was the last person you held hands with?
Collin Aka Literal-Trashlord.
7: Did you stand on your tippy-toes for your last kiss?
Nah, person was shorter than me lmao.
8: Do you think if you died, the last person you kissed would care?
Who knows. I don’t really care weirdly enough lol.
9: Last person to talk on the phone?
My mother.
10: Did anyone watch you the last time you kissed someone?
No.
11: When’s your birthday?
June 3rd.
12: Remember the first time you kissed the last person you kissed?
Not really, I kind of blocked the memory out lmao.
13: What kind of phone do you have?
Iphone S7
14: Are you wearing jeans, shorts, sweatpants, or pajama pants?
Rn I’m wearing my work pants 😩
15: Are you a different person now than you were 5 years ago?
God I hope so, I wasn’t in a great place mentally then lmao.
16: What were you doing at 4 am?
LMAO THATS LOADED. LATELY MY GAY ASS HAS BEEN FINDING MURDER MYSTERIES AND BUZZFEED VIDEOS WHILE TEXTING FRIENDS AS THEY SLEEP.
17: Would you rather write a paper or give a speech?
Paper definitely.
18: Are you lying to yourself about something?
Probably. 👀🗡
19: Last night you felt…?
Fine mostly, tired and a bit sore.
20: What’s something you cannot wait for?
To be able to go stargazing with someone close to me as well as get my life together hopefully and travel.
21: Ever told your parents you were going somewhere but when somewhere different?
I think so. I haven’t done that to my biological mom at least 😂
22: How many hours of sleep did you get last night?
Uh…7 and a half hrs?? I went to bed at 5:35 and woke up at 1:30 pm.
23: Are you a morning or night person?
Definitely a night owl. Morning person Rarely.
24: What did you get your last bruise from?
I banged into my friends counter like a dumbass. That or I was doing a price check and hit into something.
25: Do you reply to all of your texts?
Mostly though i forget to reply sometimes oof.
26: Your phone is ringing. It’s the person you fell hardest for. What do you do?
Talk to them casually, times passed and we’re still close beyond reason. ❤️
27: Did your last kiss take place in/on a bed?
No. I don’t really care about it 😤
28: Anyone you would like to get things straight with?
Yeah, a few people honestly. Some I was extremely close to.
29: How many months until your birthday?
12
30: Favorite thing to eat with peanut butter?
Celery or Apple slices.
31: Did you like this past summer?
It was good. So yeah I can’t complain.
32: What were you doing before you got on the computer?
Working and hanging out with friends.
33: Your ex is sitting next to you, with their new partner. What do you do?
Big oof. Honestly make the best of it?? Really no reason to get upset at this point.
34: What is the last thing you said out loud?
“Get fucked, Steve.” (We were playin Yahtzee with an Ai)
35: Your mood summed into one word?
O O F.
36: Are you doing anything else besides taking this survey?
playing Yahtzee with friends and an Ai Whose kicking all our asses.
37: What are your initials?
K. C. M.
38: Are you a happy person?
Generally though I do struggle with depression but no big deal.
39: Do you still talk to the person you liked 4 months ago?
Yeah, we’re still close friends.
40: Where do you want to live when your older?
I want to travel around, but I would love somewhere quiet with mountains where I can see stars almost every night.
41: Have you had your birthday this year?
Yes. We went to a trampoline park and got absolutely lit jumping around. 👀🔥
42: What did you do yesterday?
I worked 2:00 to 6:30 as a Cashier otherwise I went home and chilled out 😎
43: What will you be doing tomorrow?
Thankfully I have a day off tomorrow. So I’m probably gonna chill out and continue with ideas for a comic I might post soon.
44: How late did you stay up last night?
Until 5:35 AM.
45: Is there anyone you would do anything for?
Yeah definitely. I would drop everything for a select handful of people. Honestly I’d help anyone if I could.
46: Is it hard to make you laugh?
No omg. I laugh literally at anything unless I’m in a weird funk.
47: Do you believe ex’s can be just friends?
Yes, I’m still alright with one ex. But honestly work it out and hopefully things will be alright. Especially if its a mutual breakup things should be alright even if they’re awkward for a while.
48: Do you think any of your exes will eventually want to be with you again?
Lmao nah. I doubt it.
49: How many people have you had feelings for in the year of 2012?
BRUH YOU ACT LIKE I REMEMBER
50: Do you wish your ex was dead?
Never wish that on somebody.
51: Have you ever dyed your hair?
Yes I had it dyed Teal once.
52: Would ever take back someone that cheated?
I doubt it. I’d have issues trusting them.
53: Was New Year’s Even enjoyable?
This year shockingly was.
54: Bet you’re missing someone right now?
Yeah, I miss my family a lot. I don’t really get to see them. I got to see my mom today and I was really happy. ❤️
55: How would your parents react if you got a tattoo?
My mom probably wouldn’t like it at first but grow to like it knowing her, she wants to get a butterfly tattoo on her wrist.
56: Sleep on your back or stomach?
Stomach and side mostly. I can’t really get comfy on my back :((
57: If you could move away, no questions asked, where would it be ?
Somewhere nice and fun. Probably star lit and mountain filled but still some hustle and bussle.
58: What would you change about your life right now?
Living situation, I love living with my best friend but sometimes I miss living with my mom?? Idk.
59: Has anything upset you in the past week?
Yeah a handful of personal things. But I feel alright now.
60: Are you on the phone?
Yes
61: Today, would you rather go forward a week or back?
Probably back, I’d rather redo a few days than skip and loose out.
62: Would you take $40,000 or a brand new car?
Probably 40,000 so I can give some and help others.
63: Have you ever talked to someone when they were high?
OH YEAH THATS AN EXPERIENCE
64: Ever cried while you were on the phone with someone?
A few times, mostly when I’m stressed out or the situation is really tough.
65: Have you ever copied someone elses homework?
Yes. Especially when I forgot it and my friend came in clutch.
66: Are you the type of person who likes to be out or at home?
I’m a mix. There’s days I love to be out others inside and relaxing.
67: Do you automatically check your phone when you wake up?
It’s my alarm clock so sadly.
68: Have you ever stayed up all night on the phone?
Sadly, yes.
69: Could you use some sleep right now?
Probably like 20 + hrs. One good ass nap.
70: Are you going to have a baby by the time you’re 18?
Looks at age. Uhm 😂😂😂
71: Does it bother you when someone hides things from you?
Yeah. I’d rather the person come to me than hide it and talk shit. Even if it hurts I’d rather know and fix the situation.
72: What’s your favorite color?
I love deep reds but I also like blues and purples.
73: Have you ever slept in the same room with someone you liked?
Yes a few times
74: Have you ever been looking for something and it was already in your hand?
LMAO YES. i was looking for my wallet once and panicked but i was holding it.
75: Do you get annoyed easily?
Depending on the situation but when the questions dumb as hell or argument yes.
76: If someone liked you, would you want them to tell you?
Yeah. I’d rather know so I don’t accidentally break their heart. I’d rather know so I can confront the situation though still I’d be extremely flattered.
77: Do you have a person of the opposite sex that you can tell everything to?
Yes.
78: Does anyone call you babe?
Yeah a handful of people.
79: How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust?
A lot ????
80: What do you prefer, relationship or one night stand?
Relationship. Never had a one nighter lol.
81: What color hoodie did you wear last?
Dark purple with writing on it from my college 😂
82: Is there someone who meant alot to you at one point, and isn’t around anymore?
Yeah. Someone I really did trust and love. They did some shitty stuff and I had to break the friendship off but even now I find myself checking in on them now and again even though the answer is always the same or really cold.
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