#tumblr knows what i want tumblr knows what i need
Text
how I manifested my dream life after years of overconsumption
hello! after being in this community for many years, hopelessly and endlessly trying to manifest the life of my dreams since i was a young teen, i can finally say i did it. i'm living the life i always wanted. this is my success story ٩( 'ω' )و (very long and detailed! + mentions of heavy topics)
how i did it: the journey
i initally found out about manifesting from a friend who told me about subliminals, then i became invested in law of attraction and soon, law of assumption.
for years I was in a nonstop cycle of overconsuming information, deciding to put my foot down and say "this is it", only go back spiraling in my negative thoughts & old story hours or even minutes later. this cycle lasted for years. i felt like the law could not be this easy, and heavily relied on my 3d for evidence/signs of my desire. i felt like there was always something else to do in the 3d (subliminals, scripting, vision board, etc) and was not satisfied in just believing in the unseen.
eventually, i became sick of it. i wanted my dream life so badly, i would cry myself to sleep some nights because of how badly i wanted to be free from my old story. i hated my old life, and was desperate for my new one.
i constantly reread the same edward art posts, tumblr posts, and success stories about the law and craved for something new, but at this point i already knew all i needed to know about the law. i had some success with the law of assumption in the past (manifesting my acceptance into uni, talking to a cute boy etc.) but getting my entire dream life felt like it was impossible. i knew i can get anything and everything i wanted, but honestly i was scared and felt like there was a barrier between me and my desire. yet, i held onto these feelings for years. at some point i even felt childish and the need to "grow up and be realistic" about what i wanted since everything around me was changing and i wasn't getting any younger. but i still held onto my dreams and desires, it was planted into my heart for a reason and I really wanted it to come true.
one day i was clearing out my phone and came across blushydior's success story of how she manifested her dream life in hard circumstances. i read her post again and really internalized what she said about the law.
in short, life is a blank canvas. the minute you decide what you want, it is done. there is nothing stopping you from getting anything you ever wanted because it is already finished. just keep persisting and accepting that it is done because it simply is; nothing else left to do.
so i decided to go all in. i didn't do much: just affirm that i had my desire when i thought about it and embody the state. during the first few days, i felt a wave of happiness and excitement whenever I affirmed for my desires. i knew i had them, and it made me happy. i didn't ignore my 3d, i simply lived through it. i did whatever i had to do in my 3d while still thinking "oh i already have my desire! nothing can stop me, it's all done!"
over time, the feelings of excitement faded and it became more of a feeling of security and calmness. i would still think thoughts like "oh yeah i have my desire, oh well whatever" and simply move on.
i will say though, in the middle i did kind of cave and want to fall into my old ways. i had the feelings of calmness but felt like there was something else left to do. i logged onto tumblr and scrolled over some of the posts i had saved, but didn't read them and rely on them for info. i had to force myself to snap out of feeling like I didn't have it and remind myself that i had it. when i felt overwhelmed with my 3d or faced something that i didnt like, i would remind myself of my desires being complete.
at night i'd also imagine romantic scenarios about me and my sp to fall asleep but i didn't do anything like try to get into sats or void (i tried them before and found them quite boring lol)
eventually after sticking to the assumption that i have my desires, regardless of what i see in the 3d, nothing can stop me from getting my desire because it's already done, i got them all. woke up with everything i want. this is what it means to persist: to take the leap of faith, go all in, and just keep on believing that you already have it!
the old and new story:
old story: I grew up in a very restrictive lifestyle with little freedom and privacy in my house, as well as super traditional and religious parents that made me feel uncomfortable in many areas of my life. my life was primarily just me taking care of my annoying younger siblings and studying to get good grades so I could make my parents happy. I did not have much success with maintaining friendships, no luck in the love department, and disliked who I was as a person for much of my life. I was completely dependent on my parents and wanted their approval for everything; it felt like I was living and doing all of these activities to make them proud, even though they never told me they were. anything that I wanted to pursue I shut down before even trying because I knew they would not approve. I was also constantly being pushed into these religious spaces that made me super uncomfortable due to their beliefs and have been verbally and physically abused in the name of so-called religion. I was living a life that I did not want, by finding the law it gave me an opportunity to live my own life for once.
new story: appearance transformation from head to toe, apartment and houses of my dreams in my desired cities & countries, talents, skills, and knowledge about topics I was curious about, language fluency, ideal wardrobe with all my dream clothes, items on my wishlist, having financial freedom, being free, independent, and in charge of my life, having the boyfriend of my dreams (guys he is so fine like omg), completely revamping and rewriting my past, having a tight knit friend group and the biggest one of all, the thing i wanted for so long --
being a famous musical artist in one of the biggest girl groups in the world <3
i am so so so glad i never gave up, it really is easy.
the law in summary:-
decide what you want to manifest
have faith and know that you already have your desire, it is done and nothing can stop you from getting it (remember! methods are optional)
just persist, do not give up. it will manifest into the 3d! nothing else left to do.
good luck everyone, you can do it and i believe in you <3
#law of assumption#success story#neville goddard#void success#manifesting#manifestation#affirm and persist#law of attraction#master manifestor#loa success#loassumption#loa tumblr
588 notes
·
View notes
Text
TMA COMMISSIONS FOR GAZA
What is TMA Commissions For Gaza?
You can get small TMA commissions (a little drawing or short fanfic) in exchange for donating to 1 of 10 Gofundme's of Palestinians in Gaza (starting May 17th)
There are about 60 artists signed up already who have volunteered to work for free for this to happen. Until May 16th, you can join too!
The project is fanmade and has no connection to Rusty Quill
Our carrd: https://magnusforgaza.carrd.co/
Everything else under the cut ↓
How can I participate as an artist?
If you want to support our cause and join as a visual artist or writer - thank you! You must be at least 16 years old to participate. You can fill out this form to sign up: Artists Form
Here's a seperate post with information for artists.
How can I commission?
1: Donate to one of the 10 gofundme's. (any amount)
2: Fill out the commission form and describe what art you want!
3: And now we wait. We don't know how many commissions each artist will take on so please be patient💚
Where does the money go?
We, the organizers and artists of TMA commissions for Gaza, gain no money from this. We ask participants to donate to 1 of these 10 Gofundme's by Gazans who are trying to survive and evacuate Gaza. 5 of these Gofundmes are on the Operation Olive Branch list and the other 5 are friends and family of one of our organizers. The funds are needed for expenses such as medical care, food and first and foremost to pay for crossing the border to Egypt.
Why only 10 Gofundme's?
We hope to be more effective when focusing on just a small number of Gofundme's and not for example the whole Operation Olive Branch list. Providing a smaller number of places to donate to may also help donators to not get overwhelmed by the amount of people who need their help.
If you have any questions, send us a message here on Tumblr!
Art by: @the-munster-mash
OUR CARRD: https://magnusforgaza.carrd.co/
547 notes
·
View notes
Text
(TW: Sex)
My dear lgbt+ kids,
“Can I get pregnant if…?”
When it comes to these questions, it’s generally a good idea to assume that the answer is always yes - it’s better to use a condom when you didn’t necessarily need one than to not use one when you actually needed it. (Obligatory side note here that condoms prevent more than just pregnancy - they’re the only type of birth control that can also prevent STDs!)
But even with a safety mindset, of course we can narrow it down a bit more: you can generally get pregnant if you have ovaries and an uterus, and have vaginal sex with a person who has a penis.
Let’s apply this to some potential questions:
“Can I get pregnant if I am a trans man?” Yes. Assuming you haven’t had surgery, you can get pregnant as a trans man - even if you are on testosterone. It can stop periods but you may still ovulate. So, if you’re sexually active, it’s important to use birth control while you are on T! (And what if you are a trans man who wants to have a baby? If you are not on T, there are no specific things to consider. If you are on T, please talk to your doctor about pausing the treatment before you start trying for a baby.)
“Can I get pregnant if my partner is a trans woman?” Yes. Assuming she has a penis and is capable of producing sperm, it’s best to assume you can get pregnant and to use birth control accordingly.
“Can I get pregnant if I have sex infrequently?” Yes. It’s understandable if you feel uncomfortable taking a daily pill in this case. But even if you only have sex once a year, you can still get pregnant from that one time. So if you don’t want that to happen, please look into (or ask your doctor about) better options for your situation.
“Can I get pregnant if I pee right after sex?” Yes. Peeing after sex is a good idea to prevent UTIs but it doesn’t prevent pregnancy!
“Can I get pregnant if I drink lots of coffee before sex? What about if I jump up and down after sex?” Yes. I don’t know where the myth comes from that any of that works as “natural birth control” but it certainly doesn’t. Don’t listen to any nonsense like that, trust in what’s proven to be effective, such as condoms and birth control pills.
“Can I get pregnant if I only have oral sex?” No. You can’t get pregnant from oral sex, even if your partner has a penis (and even if you swallow sperm. That lands in your stomach and doesn’t travel to your uterus).
With all my love,
Your Tumblr Dad
244 notes
·
View notes
Text
Changing mindsets, from a Real Anti Endo™️
The Release of the (Pro/Endo) Golden Goose
I hope everyone from all sides will give this important, heartfelt post a read.
It's likely something you'll want to be aware of if you have a vested interest in syscourse and the validity of endogenic systems. Please give this a chance.
It's been almost three years since I started my blogs. Wow. I've been on tumblr a hell of a lot longer, but I really wasn't involved in the system community. I started out firm and loud. I probably inadvertently fakeclaimed (I went into this with the rule that I would NOT directly tell anyone they were faking, it was a boundary that I knew would ruin me socially if I crossed it, but I'm sure I probably did without meaning to), I name called and made fun of people and things. I was disrespectful to people. I invaded tags to get my message out there, though I was quick to stop once I realized I was making the tags unusable for the community I claimed to want to protect.
I learned very quickly what was appropriate and what wasn't, what I could get away with and what I couldn't. It started to become a numbers game, influenced by the risk of the post.
I made a lot of friends and a lot of enemies, and I amassed a following of over 2k. More people have come and gone from my little community than I ever thought possible. People made fanart of me, and I cherish those so deeply. I have over 300 asks because I struggle to delete the ones thanking me.
And the more I was thanked, the nicer I got, the more thanks, the nicer I got, rinse and repeat until I had trouble NOT empathizing with pro/endos. The more I was willing to listen, the more legitimate sources I came across that disproved my original ideas about consciousness. The people sharing the sources were more respectful than I thought they'd be. Things were starting to look a bit cloudy.
I talked to my colleagues about how they, as therapists, would handle some of these endos in their practice, and while their belief in the concept varied, kindness and attempts to understand was the consistent answer. When had I lost that kindness and understanding that had driven me to that field to begin with?
Colleagues, yes. For those who don't know, I have a degree in social services and counselling (plus three other degrees). It's why the current situation with the antis turning on me is so funny. I still can't get into the mindset of some of these new anti endos, I just can't imagine justifying that level of cruelty. I had lines that I wouldn't cross, and I didn't think people could be worse than me.
... That might have been a trauma thing, looking back on it.
So I got desperate.
I spoke to the actual doctors who wrote some of these papers all of us are quoting. Everyone was arguing the meaning of the words, so I went directly to the source.
Dr Colin Ross, who wrote about endogenous multiplicity in the 80s. I told him everything-- about plurals, non-traumagenic systems, syscourse, what was being debated, how I and others interpreted his words, and what I wanted to learn.
Was plurality only trauma based?
And back and forth and back and forth we went, with me asking over and over again in different ways, NEEDING to hear that it was.
But I never got that answer. He meant what he meant. He said what he said and he meant it.
That plurality was not only found in the aftermath of trauma.
And I said nothing to anyone because I couldn't reconcile it.
Don't try to read between the lines, I assure you, there isn't some hidden meaning to be found there. I can't share all of the messages because some contained personal information, but my final response will tell you all you need to know.
(It did NOT, in fact, make sense, and it took me three years to "rethink my paper" that endogenic plurality wasn't possible, I did not win that conversation, it was a dying stance that was not supported)
I've been accused of paying too much attention to my follower count, but I can't really help it. It's really scary when you make a post and see a sizeable drop. It means a lot of different things. My posts have less reach and support. I've upset people. I've done something wrong. My community is leaving me.
I'm in a weird spot, where I'm blocked by so much of the pro/endo community that I have nothing to join, and the anti endo community, who I still wholeheartedly support, continues to leave me for -checks smudged writing on hand- being too nice??
Misinformation about DID is a massive problem, and it's why I still consider myself anti endo and support that community. I relate to them in such a way that I'll always gravitate to and empathize with them.
Or at least, that's what I thought.
At this point, though, how can I not be pro/endo when Colin fucking Ross says it's possible?
I've already written about how I'm really struggling with these labels, and I love the people that have stuck around while I struggle to figure this out.
I hurt when I see the people that once supported me leave.
My (online) world is shrinking. Literally.
That's scary.
When you've watched so many turn away, you start to wonder, with every post, where is the line where the rest are going to leave? Is it this post?
I just want to be me, us, we want to laugh at the stupid crap people say, system or not, I want to talk about my disorder, I want to combat misinformation, I want to have productive, fun conversations about ideas and concepts with people who disagree and have different interpretations. I want to play devil's advocate and get people thinking. I want to be able to comment positivity and kindness on any post I see, I want to feel comfortable talking to more people about their ideas. I sympathize with anti endos, I relate to CDD systems, I still firmly believe that CDDs and plurality are different, unrelated concepts.
My priority will always and forever be the CDD community first and foremost.
However, I am a hypocrite. I have gone straight to the horse's mouth and failed. I've seen so much research that I finally get it. I'm grappling with holding on to this conversation with Dr Ross, wondering what harm I could have prevented if I'd gone public with these emails earlier.
Since when has being open to change been a bad thing?
Since when has showing respect to lived experiences been a bad thing?
What am I? What label describes this?
How do I go forward from here?
What are you going to do with this information?
I promise you, hate isn't the way forward.
#syscourse#not syscourse#pro syscourse conversation#anti endo#pro endo#anti plural#pro plural#debunk#endogenic safe#system safe#pro system
170 notes
·
View notes
Text
Just Pretend-Twenty Five
*gif created by me. feel free to use, simply give credit*
Parings: Noah Sebastian x Musician! Reader
Warnings/Tropes: language, angst, fluff, smut, star-crossed lovers, right person/wrong time, cheating, talks of mental abuse.
Summary: “I can wait for years, heaven knows I’m not getting over you.” A story about two star-crossed lovers, that always find their way back because their souls are entwined. The universe desperately attempts to bring them together, no matter what the cost.
Authors Note: I AM SO FUCKING SORRY IT TOOK ME ALMOST TWO MONTHS TO UPDATE. I love you all for sticking with us through this terrible lull. But I promise(well hope to) not go so long in between updates again. Hopefully, it was well worth the wait.
Also, please let me know if the tags didn't work. Tumblr has been a pain in my ass with them lately and with how many of you wanted to be tagged, I want to make sure I didn't miss any!
FUCK YOU. EAT SHIT. KILL GOD. DETHRONE.
We are Fallenvvitch. Goodnight.
🪽🔮
Collaborating With: @thescarlettvvitch(better give her all the love as well)
Tags: @thescarlettvvitch @mitchhbitch @missduffsblog @hayleylatour @sleepyomens @loeytuan98 @artificialbreezy @marvelousmal @bngurngheart @lma1986 @dsireland86 @wild-child-7747 @calleyx13 @illmakeyousaywow @jaded-and-hollow-souls @exitwoundsx @shayzillaaaa @lookwhatitcost @badomensls @princesspeach-00 @burning-outx @shadowseve @collective-heartbreak @klutzy-kay24 @sorrowsofsilence @sweetlittlekitsune @shilohrosechicken @itsafullmoon @toospooktocute @niicoleleigh @thatchickwiththecamera @hoe-for-daddywise @whenthesummerdies @cookiesupplier @concreteemo @thisbicc @sammyjoeee @joe9cool @ozwriterchick @teenblues @bngurngheart @malice-ov-mercy @krisslee18 @xxkittenkissesxx @happi-goth @embracethereaper42 @softvgold @cncohshit @heyyoplayer @rain-down-on-me @bloody-delusion-expert @respectfulrebel @reader13000 @koskeepsake @malerieee @cheyyyyr @myownthoughts12 @noahsbong @laurpartyprogram @cloudykoookie @jessiskyee @a1ex-ba1ex @sideeyenoah @emzandthevoid @badomensls @bellaboo967 @waake-mee-up @rxdlstgn @anthemheatwave
READER
I hummed along to the tune that played on the speakers, swaying my hips, as I moved around the room helping Matt set up the equipment.
“You don’t have to help, Y/N. You should sit and relax,” Matt said while I handed him a specific cord he was looking for to hook up to one of the speakers.
I shrugged. “I don’t mind. I’ve always been a workhorse so the idea of sitting on my ass while you all are working doesn’t feel right.”
He smiled. “Have I mentioned that you and Noah are perfect for each other?”
“Once or twice,” I shrugged with a hint of a smirk.
There was a faraway look in Matt’s eyes, one I’ve recognized all too well; loneliness.
“Hey,” I nudged him with an elbow. “Everything alright?”
He let out a long breath before adjusting his hat, keeping his eyes cast down at his laptop, the program he uses for mixing the songs up on the screen.
“Promise not to tell the guys? I don’t need them giving me shit for it,” he said.
Immediately I nodded and crossed my heart so he continued. “I see what all of you guys have and sometimes, a part of me wonders if I’ll ever get anything even close to it.”
I frowned. “Matt, you will! I don’t want to sound cliche, but that person for you is out there. They’ll show up when you stop looking. Neither Noah nor I were looking for a relationship, and look where we are now. It wasn’t an easy or short road by any means but we got here.”
“It might be too late for me,” he grumbled under his breath before clicking away at his computer.
Just as my lips moved to say something, Noah’s voice came through the speakers in the room.
“Angel, I love you.”
My cheeks burned as I glanced over at him with a wide smile to which he shrugged.
“I had to test if the microphones worked,” he said.
“Right,” I giggled while walking over to the area of the room that was set up for band rehearsals.
Bad Omens were going on tour in two weeks, the first one since they rebranded themselves with this new era. Everyone was nervous because they wanted to make sure everything went perfectly. Part of me felt sad and guilty that I wasn’t able to go on the first set of shows because Hollow Souls had media planned.
That may be why I kept trying to help out any way I could with the rehearsals; to show Noah and everyone else that I supported them.
However, I did plan on meeting Noah for the last three shows, which seemed to ease the sadness on his face. We’d only ever gone a few days without seeing each other since we got together, so now that we were about to go without seeing each other for nearly two weeks, my heart hurt.
Cheesy, but it was true.
Noah’s hands immediately found my hips and brought me close to him, my hands resting on his chest.
“What’s wrong with Matt?” He nodded behind me.
I played with the strings of his Hereditary sweatshirt. We just watched the movie with Jolly and Astrid last night, and my brain was still swirling with the ending.
“I think he’s starting to feel a little alone. He sees us, Jolly and Astrid, Jesse and Maxine, and starts to feel like he missed his time,” I said under my breath so others wouldn’t hear.
The corner of Noah’s mouth pulled down on a line as he kept his eyes on Matt.
“Maybe the tour will help clear his mind,” he said with a sad sigh.
“Oh, about that,” I pulled the string of his hoodie again to pull his attention to me. “Are you still upset that I'm stealing Lana from you guys?”
He chuckled before squeezing my hips. “No, angel. Hollow Souls need her more than Bad Omens do. Plus, she found a replacement for her so Bryan doesn’t have to do most of the photography. I think it’s Lana’s cousin.”
“Good because Malcolm felt like shit. But we don’t have a full-time photographer and want to get these promo shots out as soon as possible. Lana accepted before she knew about your tour-.”
Noah hushed my ramblings with a gentle kiss to my lips, one that we both smiled into.
“Y/N, it’s alright,” he muttered against my lips.
Staring up into those almond eyes I loved so much, I eventually nodded and patted his chest.
“Okay.”
Linking our fingers together, Noah led me to the other end of the room where Davis was working on filling up the boxes of merch.
“I want to show you the new look we have planned for our stage outfits,” Noah said.
My eyes widened, almost forgetting that the guys talked about changing a lot with this new era. He showed me the pants, tank top, button-up shirt, and jacket; all black. But what kept my attention was at the top of the table, Bad Omens symbols calling to me.
“Ski mask?” I questioned.
Noah smirked while putting it on, those eyes darkening when I sucked in a breath.
“What does the mask represent?” I now asked.
“My vision,” he said while adjusting it.
“Ah, yes the vision,” I emphasized while rolling my eyes playfully.
Noah pointed to his head. “It’s all in my brain.”
“You have a lot going on in there,” I chuckled but kept a careful eye on the mask, assessing it while feeling the burn ignite within.
“When you don’t occupy over 95% of it,” Noah shrugged but then narrowed his eyes. “Is the mask doing it for you, angel?”
Davis tossed down one of the shirts he was folding and began walking away, muttering something under his breath.
“Can’t they wait until I’m out of the room?”
I licked my lips, doing my best to appear not turned on by the image of Noah in the mask.
“Maybe. But I still think you’re missing one thing,” I said with a low voice.
Somehow I could tell he raised a brow. “Yeah?”
Slinking up closer to him, I raked my nails down the exposed skin of his neck while whispering over his lips.
“Those grillz I found hiding in your bathroom drawer,” I nibbled on his bottom lip before walking past him, purposely putting a little sway in my hips knowing he was watching.
For the next few hours, I watched them rehearse the new setlist they created for the tour. I stood next to Matt in his makeshift sound desk, every so often watching what he was doing, and when they started to rehearse The Death of Peace of Mind, I couldn’t help but smirk when I thought back to the memory of hearing the song for the first time.
Noah must have been as well because as he moved in place with the microphone held tight in his grasp, his eyes met mine before winking.
“I miss the way you say my name. The way you bend, the way you break. Your makeup running down your face. The way you fuck, the way you taste,” his angelic voice sang.
“Woo!” I yelled while holding up a finger.
Suddenly a warm hue crept over my face when I realized I had said that out loud and slunk farther down in the chair next to Matt.
“Woo?” He asked with a teasing grin.
“I don’t know,” I shrugged while playing with a piece of lint on my sweatpants. “It just works. Every time I listen to the song, I always add the woo.”
Noah, whose own smirk was wide and prideful, leaned against the mic stand; they had stopped playing with my embarrassing outburst.
“I like it, it’s cute,” he admitted.
“Maybe you should do it on tour,” Folio suggested to Noah with a wiggle of his brows.
Groaning, I gathered up my things before walking up to Noah and kissing him.
“I have to go. I have my appointment with Dr. Poulos. I’ll call you after.”
“Don’t forget about this weekend, angel,” Noah pointed a finger.
I nodded with a pout. “Right, our super secret date that I don’t get any hints for.”
When Noah bid me goodbye with a gentle pat on my ass, Jolly’s voice stopped me before I could leave.
“Hey, Y/N?”
“Hm?” I adjusted the strap of my bag.
He scratched at the large bun of hair on top of his head. “Is your therapist seeing new patients?”
“Are you interested in therapy?” I asked with a raised brow.
“No,” Jolly shook his head with a sigh. “For Astrid. The last couple of weeks, she’s not been herself. I think with the upcoming anniversary of her father's death, she’s taking it hard but won’t talk to me about it.”
My heart sank for one of my best friends. We just hung out last night and I hadn’t noticed anything was wrong with her.
“Shit, I had no idea.”
Jolly set down his guitar. “She hides it very well. I only know bits and pieces about what happened to her father but I think she had someone else to talk about it with, it would help her.”
“Definitely,” I nodded. “I’ll grab a card from Dr. Poulos and put in a good word.”
Jolly placed a kiss on the side of my head. “Thank you.”
NOAH
The songs of birds danced around us as I held tightly on Y/N’s hands, the waves crashing at the pier below us and she clutched something tightly in her chest.
“You didn’t have to buy this for me, you know?”
Even though she tried to chastise me for spending my money on her, I knew from the smile on her face that she was happy to have a new wolf stuffed animal; one that mirrored the one I gave her back on our tour together.
The one Trey threw out of the window of their tour bus.
We spent our entire afternoon at the California Wolf Center, seeing different packs of wolves up close and learning about them. The smile that Y/N had on her face as she bent low in front of the fence to say hello to one of the wolves a few feet away from her made my heart flutter wildly in my chest.
If I didn’t already know that I loved her, I’d probably tell her for the first time at that moment.
After a long drive back into the city, we decided to walk onto the pier for some ice cream.
“I want to take care of you, angel,” I squeezed her hand as I led her towards a bench on the white sand.
We both sat and watched the waves for a few minutes while Y/N read her book. I had my arm wrapped around her, smelling the hint of vanilla in her hair and the floral scent of her perfume as it clung to her skin, and glanced over to the bench across from us. It was an older couple, the man reading a book to his wife, and I cocked my head to the left, something about them oddly familiar.
“Angel,” I rubbed her shoulder.
She hummed, not taking her eyes off the book she was reading. I glanced at the title when she pulled it out of her bag.
The Dare by Harley Laroux.
When I asked what it was about, Y/N’s face turned crimson before waving me off and muttered something about how I wouldn’t like it. But when I read a few sentences over her shoulder, I could see why she blushed.
Something about the girl being bent over the guy’s lap in a movie room and getting spanked repeatedly.
“Y/N,” I said her name this time, pulling her attention away from the book and up to me. “Haven’t we seen them before?”
She followed my gaze over to the older couple and pursed her lips, trying to think if we had.
“We have! In South Carolina. You joined me at that cafe when I went to order all of us coffee that day on tour. They were walking ahead of us.”
Suddenly the light clicked on and I nodded when that day crept into my mind. I’d been so nervous to be alone with Y/N at the time but being so close to her in line and having her scent engulf me for the first time told me that she would sink herself deep inside of me.
“What are the odds,” I muttered with a smile.
“He’s reading a book to her,” Y/N mused.
I dragged my fingers up and down her arm while gazing down at her. “Do you think he’s reading her a dirty book like the one you’re reading?”
She smacked my chest causing an uproar of laughter from me.
“Are you going to get me some ice cream or what?” She raised a brow with a playful smile.
I brushed a kiss along her forehead. “What kind?”
Y/N tapped her chin in mock thought. “I’ll take a fudgsicle, please.”
With a sweet kiss on her lips, I let her by herself with the wolf stuffed animal and book and walked over to the concession stand, noticing a long line already.
It was a cool autumn day and everyone wanted to spend the last few hours of daylight outside. I, however, needed to waste another hour until we were able to head back to my house. As the line moved up slowly, I glanced down at my phone to read the last text conversation in the group chat with my roommates.
Michael: Where are we supposed to stay tonight?
Jesse: I’m staying at Maxine’s and Jolly’s staying with Astrid.
Michael: Oh way to rub it in. I guess I’ll bunk with Malcolm and Chase.
Me: Salem misses you 😂
Michael: I swear, if that cat bites my feet again in the middle of the night, I’m going to drop him off with you guys.
Jolly: Everything is set up, Noah. We’ll be out of the house in an hour.
Jesse: I don’t want to know what you have planned tonight but all I ask is please don’t touch my strawberries. They’re from Matt’s garden.
I laughed while stuffing my phone back into the pocket of my gray sweatshirt and moved forward in line. My hood was up and pulled low over the brim of my hat, making it hard for anyone to recognize me. We’d been fortunate enough all day not to be bothered by fans but now seeing how busy the pier was, I wanted to be extra careful. Y/N and I had yet to make our relationship public and we were hoping to keep it as quiet as long as we could since we were becoming very private people.
As the line shifted again, I noticed the older gentleman was now standing in front of me. With a quick glance back over to the seating on the beach, I saw Y/N still reading her book then realized the older woman was by herself, only to realize that her husband was standing in front of me, muttering something about the prices under his breath.
“That will be $5.95,” the younger woman smiled.
“My lord, how times have changed. What do we expect in this economy?” He said.
I stifled a laugh behind my hand as I rubbed at my jaw. “You’re not kidding.”
The older man patted the pockets of his tan jacket and then his pants. “I seem to have forgotten my wallet. Here, let this young man go ahead, I think my wife has my wallet.”
While reaching into my back pocket, I pulled out my wallet and waved to the worker behind the booth.
“I’ll get it. Can you add a fudgesicle and vanilla cone, please?” I asked with a smile.
As the worker went to work about getting my ice cream, the older man turned to look up at me; literally.
“Oh, my. You’re a tall fella, you must have eaten your vegetables when you were a kid,” the man adjusted his glasses.
“I’m a fan of tomatoes,” I shrugged with a laugh.
“You didn’t have to do that,” he nodded towards the concessions where the worker handed him his two vanilla cones.
“It’s not a problem,” I smiled at the worker after dropping a twenty on the counter, telling her to keep the change.
“You’ve got a name, son?” The older man asked as we both began walking back towards the beach.
“Noah,” I answered after a lick of my ice cream.
The burst of vanilla bean pleasured my taste buds and exploded in my mouth. It reminded me of something I’d like to try later.
“Well, I’ll be,” he chuckled. “That’s my name although I had it a lot longer than you, but-.”
He waved me off but then pointed to the exposed tattoos on my fingers. “So what do you do, Noah? You have those tattoos all over and a cool haircut. Let me guess. The arts?”
I nodded with a grin. “Yes, sir. You hit the nail right on the head! How about you?”
“Ah, what can I say? I know a thing or two about predicting things. And I’ve worked quite a few different jobs in my lifetime. Restored an old house and made an art studio for my sweetheart, even got myself in the paper. But now, the two of us are here on vacation.”
We came to a stop right where the sand and concrete met and Noah smiled while pointing over to the bench I first noticed them.
“That’s my Allie over there. Do you have a sweetheart, young Noah?”
“I do,” I grinned. “She’s sitting right over there, the one with the book and wolf stuffed animal.”
Old Noah’s tired eyes drifted over to where Y/N was sitting, the wind blowing through her hair, and the sight of her looking so at peace made my heart swell.
“You know,” I shifted on my feet. “We’ve actually seen you and your wife before. It was a few years ago at a coffee shop in South Carolina. It’s a little place called Palmieri.”
Old Noah’s eyes widened. “Well, I’ll be. What a small world. There’s no way I’d remember a name like that.”
I licked at the chocolate ice cream that ran down my hand from Y/N’s fudgesicle and shrugged. “It’s a place that means a lot to me.”
“How funny is that?” Old Noah’s chuckle shook his whole small frame before giving me a wink. “If I learned anything over my lifetime, Noah. It’s that fate will always prevail.”
I couldn’t help but make a face at that, only because I was becoming such a private person so it shocked me that this older man could understand parts of my life without giving much away. All of the odds and chances were starting to feel very Twilight Zone. It made me feel vulnerable and shocked that things from the universe were real. Everyone had been saying it ever since I walked off the bus on the first day of the tour and shook her hand for the first time.
Y/N was my soulmate and I was hers.
Old Noah must have caught the look on my face and patted my shoulder. “Don’t go too far in your head, son. It could be hard to get out of.”
“Yeah,” I muttered under my breath.
“Well, all I’ll say is hold your sweetheart close, Noah. A woman like that is hard to come by. I promise, if the two of you treat each other right, you will live the best life together.”
I nodded with a smile. “Thank you, sir.”
Old Noah took a few slow steps before glancing back toward me. “Thank you for being so kind, Noah. You don’t see that much anymore. Have a great rest of your day.”
“You too.”
I made sure to watch as he made it back to his wife, slowly sitting down next to her and handing her the ice cream cone. There was something in the way she smiled at him; almost as if she was trying to remember something.
Then, I glanced over to Y/N, who still had her face buried in her book with a deep crimson hue covering her cheeks to the tips of her ears. Whatever she was reading in that book had her flustered in ways that made her pull at the collar of her shirt and shift in her spot on the bench. My eyes cast downward to her wrist, the metal chain catching the setting sun and I peeked down at my own. A sudden flash of a hospital bed appeared in my mind but was gone just as quickly.
Shaking it off, I reached Y/N and handed her the fudgesicle.
“Thank you, mochi,” she beamed at me after setting her book down.
We ate in silence for a few moments until I noticed a strand of hair falling into her face, nearly into the ice cream, so I brushed it away and tucked it behind her ear.
“Your hair. It was going to get sticky.”
She left a kiss on my cheek, the butterflies in my stomach having a whirlwind of a time.
“You’re always taking care of me, Noah. Are you going to get ice cream out of my hair even when we’re old and gray?” Y/N asked.
I pressed a cold kiss to her forehead. “That’s the plan.”
Old and gray.
“How do you think I’d look old and gray?” I wondered after finishing off my ice cream cone.
“Oh, handsome as ever and wearing a black cardigan. I bet you’ll still have the Levi cut,” she mockingly teased, resting her head on my shoulder.
The sounds of the waves crashing ashore and laughter from the families and variety of couples brought a weird sense of calm to my ever-racing mind and heart. I did my best to heed Old Noah’s advice to not get so far in my own mind and right now, with Y/N by my side, it made it easier. The last couple of years hadn’t been easy for either of us, especially the times we almost lost each other due to our own fucked up style of communicating. But because of therapy, we were learning and growing.
When I watched a couple, no younger than us, splash each other in the water, I was reminded of a time, long ago, when Y/N and I did the same.
"If you were a bird, what bird would you be?" She asked when she came to a stop in front of me.
"Well," I ran a hand over my chin to show I was thinking deeply about this question. "According to the fanbase, they see me as a duck so I guess that."
"I love that! Oh, you know what would be funny?" She grinned.
I shrugged. "No, but I have a feeling you'll tell me."
"When you scream to Dethrone, you should be funny by saying this is dethrone you quacks, instead of fucks. It'd be a way of showing the fans you read everything online," she deadpanned before falling into a fit of giggles and looking up to the darkening skies above her.
Seeing how much that small joke made her laugh made me make a mental note to say that next tour.
"What about you? What bird would you be?"
"A crow," she answered so fast, almost as if she thought about this question in depth before. "They’re mysterious, they’re misunderstood and always take care of the ones they love.”
I hummed with her answer. "I can see that. You'd make a lovely crow."
She bumped her shoulder with me as the waves crashed harder around us. "You'd make a pretty cool duck. And we'd be bird friends."
"Well," I glided my hands through the water. "If you're a bird, then I'm a bird."
“Angel,” I asked, pulling her attention away from her book.
“Hm?”
“If we were birds, would we be bird lovers? Because last time, we were bird friends,” I said.
The corners of Y/N's lips curled up in a smile as if the memory was replaying in her mind like a movie.
“We’d be the best bird lovers,” she breathed with a kiss on my lips.
Wrapping my arm around her, we let the silence fall between us again, truly enjoying this moment together. Ever since we both released new albums, our work schedule had been packed with constant media or preparing for the upcoming tour. This was a rare weekend where we all had off so neither of us was in a rush to leave.
Well, until I got a text from Jolly letting me know that the house was empty.
“I think there’s a fireworks show tonight at the pier,” Y/N said while looking at her phone.
Fireworks at the pier.
“Noah! Stop!” Y/N giggled while wrapping her arms around my neck.
“What?” I stopped spinning. “Let you go?”
She shrieked as I nearly dropped her. “No, you idiot! Don’t let me go!”
As if I had just been slapped in the face, I sat up straighter when everything clicked into the constantly moving puzzle pieces inside my mind.
“It’ll all connect, everything!” I muttered while chewing on my bottom lip.
“Conjuring magic there?”
Y/N’s giggles snapped my head towards hers as I did myself to calm my thoughts so she could understand.
“Remember at breakfast when Jolly and I were telling you our future plans for Bad Omens?”
She nodded, a pretty confused look on her face. “Yes?”
“The comics, the music videos, all of it. It’ll connect,” I rambled on my idea when she still looked at me confused.
“So, the covers would be what ifs?” Y/N asked after a moment.
I snapped my finger with an eager nod. “Yes, exactly!”
There was still hesitation on her face as she turned to face me head-on, fingers meddling with the chain around her wrist.
“Just Pretend? Don’t you think it kind of gives away the elusiveness of everything? Of us?” Y/N wondered.
“Not at all, angel. Let me explain,” I linked our fingers together and then went about spending the next couple of minutes explaining my grand idea.
READER
Oh. My. Gods.
I came to a halt in the middle of Noah’s living room, all of my breath stolen by the bright and colorful sight in front of me. On every living room and kitchen surface were bouquets; of different sizes, colors, and kinds. On the mantle of the fireplace was a large purple bouquet of Violets. On the end table next to the couch was one of blue orchids. Spread out along the kitchen island were three large vases of pale pink peonies. Besides the flowers, candles were lit and spread out throughout the open space.
Words felt foreign on my lips as I looked at all the other array of flowers, feeling the tears well up in the corners of my eyes and my throat burned when I tried not to let out a sob.
“Noah,” I choked while turning to look at him. “What is all of this?”
He was leaning against the front door with an apprehensive look on his face. Immediately, I could tell he was nervous with how tense his shoulders were.
“We never spent Valentine’s Day together,” Noah stood up straighter and cleared his throat when it cracked.
“But it’s March,” you giggled.
He rubbed the back of his neck. “I know. But I wanted to give this to you. I’m trying to make up for our lost time together.”
I walked over to the bouquets of Violets on the mantel and breathed in the sweet scent. “Do each of these have a significance?”
This seemed to break Noah out of his nervous stupor because he took off his hood, shaking his hair before coming over to me.
“I’m glad you asked, angel,” he smiled. “The orchids and peonies represent love and admiration in Asia. The violets, also known as the Sumire, represent life and sincerity. Its small size and delicate nature represent deep affection for someone. These flowers are very important in Japan.”
You hummed while plucking one out of the face and twirling it between your fingers.
“Can you guess which ones are my favorite?”
When Noah shook his head, I plucked another one from the vase this time tucking it behind his ear.
“The violets because my affection for you runs deep. But I think you already knew that,” you pecked his lips.
Noah gave me a bashful smile while casting his eyes down at our feet, a crimson hue coloring his face. So I cupped his cheek, forcing him to look at me, and I could feel the nervousness almost burn my palm.
“Mochi,” you breathed. “You’re more nervous now than when you showed me my art studio.”
He rubbed at his cheek before motioning to the flowers around us. “I’ve never done this before. Dates and being romantic. I guess I want everything to be perfect. You deserve it.”
I brought the flower that was held between my fingers up to his nose, brushing it over the freckles there which in turn, made Noah scrunch up his nose with a quiet chuckle.
The sight of him like this, bashful and giggling, made me weak in the knees so I kept myself up by grasping at the pocket of his sweatshirt.
“Noah, it’s just me. You don’t have to do all of this or be nervous. You know I’d be perfectly fine with a simple rose stem.”
“It’s not just you, angel. It’s all of you, everything I do now is for you. I want to make you happy,” he said while locking his hands behind my neck.
“You do make me happy, mochi,” you professed while playing with the flower behind his ear.
“I know,” he nodded assuringly. “But I-I didn’t have a chance to express how much I love you and want to take care of you. You mean so much to me and whatever I can do to prove that to you, I will.”
His smile was slanted slightly and his cheeks were still flushed as he twirled a piece of hair around his lock fingers before locking them behind my neck again; keeping me in place.
Not that I minded. I had no reason to leave.
“I know. I love you for it,” I kissed those lips that always tasted light and sweet, like honey. All I could taste now was how unbitter it all was.
There was no goodbye.
All him, all sweet.
“You’re adorable like this, mochi. Bashful every time we kiss.”
He playfully rolled his eyes before capturing my lips again. “Laugh it up you little brat. I need your lips like I need oxygen.”
Little brat.
Those two words made an inferno burn deep within my core and I let out a soft moan. Titling up my chin with slight defiance at him, I gave him a teasing wink.
“Why don’t I show you how much of a little brat I can be?”
My breath fanned over his lips, a tease to his words, then when something dark flashed across his eyes I knew that I had less than three seconds to create some distance between us. My laughter echoed through the space of Noah’s house as his loud footsteps chased after me. I ran from his living room, through the kitchen, and into his bedroom with his tall presence hot on my ass.
I wanted him on me in more ways than one.
Once inside his bedroom, I stayed on one side of the bed while Noah stood on the other, both of our chests rising and falling trying to catch our breath. His hair had become disheveled in our chase and it was falling into his face, him not making a move to brush it back. Those dark eyes stared me down through the even darker tendrils and my stomach flipped when Noah cocked his head to the side.
“I’m waiting,” he held out his hands to the side.
I raised a brow. “For what?”
“For you to show me how bratty you can be,” the speed at which his tongue snapped out to wet his lips was astonishing.
A devious smirk pulled at the corner of my mouth before I made quick work of stripping out of my clothes, letting them pool at my feet. I stood in front of Noah in nothing but a pair of crimson panties.
“Angel,” Noah’s voice rumbled deep in his chest.
“What?” I shrugged, innocently.
These were his favorite pair of panties. He always raved at how they stood out against my skin tone.
“I can smell you from here,” his nostrils flared.
“You cannot,” I scoffed while placing my hands on my hips, purposely cocking my left hip out.
Noah didn’t say anything, instead, he hooked a finger and beckoned me over to him. I shook my head with a wicked gleam in my eyes.
“I’m actually kind of tired,” I stretched my arms wide, faking a yawn. “I’m going to take a shower.”
As I stepped around the bed, Noah’s quick reflexes met me halfway causing me to scream and I jumped up on the bed to get away from him. I made it two steps on top of his bed until his strong arms wrapped around me from behind, tackling me to the bed.
“Angel,” Noah grunted while thrusting his hips into mine. “You’re such a tease.”
I bit back a moan. “I’m not doing anything.”
“Really?” His long finger grazed over the lacey material of my panties, teasing my clit.
This time I was unable to hold back the moan especially when his finger slipped underneath my panties to now gather my arousal to my clit. Noah’s teeth grazed over my collarbone, tasting me and humming in approval.
Until some noise from his computer went off and made him groan before climbing off the bed.
“What is that?” I asked while resting up on my elbows.
Noah clicked on his mouse a few times. “Orie wants me to get in a game with him.”
Suddenly, a thought came to mind and I tip-toed over to Noah, wrapping my arms around his chest from behind.
“Play a game with him,” I breathed against the shell of his ear.
He turned his head to glance at me over his shoulder, holding my hands against his chest. “Y/N, I can tell him no. It’s fine.”
I shook my head with a wink. “Play a game with him, Noah. Make sure the camera is off and strip down.”
His cheeks turned a deep shade of red, almost mirroring the color of my panties before I urged him to follow my orders with a swift pat on his ass. While he accepted the game invite from Orie, Noah stripped out of his clothes and sat in his computer chair.
“Don’t forget the headset and these,” I said while rummaging around the box underneath his bed before tossing one of the objects over at him.
I had a box of almost the same things underneath my own bed back at home.
Noah caught what I threw him mid-air, the golden lenses catching the light from the LED lights in the room.
“I haven’t worn glasses in months, Y/N. Why would I need them now?” He questioned with a slight slant on his lips while twirling the gold round glasses between his fingers.
Rolling my eyes, I stuffed the box back underneath his bed.
“Wait,” he pointed a finger. “How long has that been under there? And why were my old glasses in there?”
“Noah, please,” I semi-wined while running a hand through my hair. “Can you just-?”
With a wave of a hand to the glasses, he eventually understood why I wanted him to put them on.
“A little role play?” He teased while putting them on.
I sucked in a breath at the vision of him in front of me. I’d seen streams and pictures of him wearing these glasses with his long hair and I thought he was breathtaking in them.
Now with his short Levi haircut and all of his tattoos on full display for me, Noah somehow managed to be even more gorgeous.
With the headset on, he fell onto the computer chair and spoke into the microphone. “Hey, Orie. Yeah, I got a little bit to play a round.”
Once I slipped out of my panties and tossed them on Noah’s pillow, I held the black rose sex toy in one hand and when I reached the corner of the bedroom where Noah had his computer set up, I froze in place. His cock was thick, almost standing straight up with how he was sitting and I bit my lip when I watched precum ooze out of the slit.
I noticed he was already in some game with Orie, his fingers working fast on the keys and mouse, so I pressed a finger to my lips.
“Be quiet now, Noah. We don’t need to let Orie know what we’re doing,” I whispered while straddling him on his chair so he was able to see the computer monitor.
“Y/N,” Noah warned.
Ignoring him, I ripped open the condom and slowly rolled it over his cock which made him let out a low noise from his chest.
“Shh,” I hushed while clamping a hand over his mouth. “Not so loud.”
My stomach burned with arousal, igniting a part of me I never knew existed. My sex life had improved with Noah and I was able to find out new kinks. What we were about to do, sex with someone possibly hearing was new. I knew that Noah wouldn’t let Orie hear anything but even the thought of him hearing something turned me on.
“Is that Y/N?” Orie’s voice sounded from Noah’s headset.
I winked as Noah’s eyes darted from the computer monitor to me. “She’s yelling at Salem. We have him here tonight and I guess he’s being too loud or something.”
“Wow,” I mouthed, proud of how well he came up with that lie.
With his hands preoccupied, I adjusted myself over his cock and locked eyes with him as I sunk deep on to him. My groan caught in my throat at the fullness of Noah’s cock in my pussy. It felt fresh and new every time.
I cringed a little from the pain due to my endometriosis but as soon as I started moving up and down, the pain began to subside. Noah’s bottom lip was caught between his teeth as he tried his best to keep his attention on his computer while I rode him, slow at first.
“Angel,” he let out quietly through gritted teeth.
Ignoring him, I flipped on the black rose, the vibrations sounding loud in the quiet room and when I touched my clit with it I wasn’t able to keep that moan quiet.
“Fuck,” I dragged out while leaning my head back.
“What’s that?” Orie’s voice asked through Noah’s headset again.
“It's so good,” my body writhed against Noah’s.
He quickly said goodbye to Orie before exiting the game and ripping off the headset. My squeals bounced off the walls when one of Noah’s hands snaked around my throat, using his thumb to hold my chin straight.
“Such a fucking brat,” he hissed when I rolled my hips over his cock. “What if he heard you? No one is allowed to hear those pretty little moans. Just me.”
I whined when he pulled the rose away from my clit, immediately missing the friction.
“I didn’t-,” I was unable to finish my words because Noah wrapped his other arm around my back to pull me closer to his chest, the head of his cock hitting that spot.
He bit down on my breast, right above my nipple, and I cried out in pleasure.
“I should punish you,” he rasped, voice gone with lust, and began pulling his cock out.
“No, no. I’m sorry,” I shook my head and desperately tried to stop him.
Noah raised a brow while tightening his grip around my throat and pushed his cock in deeper. “You’re sorry?”
I did my best to nod in his grasp. “Y-yes. Please, I need you to move again.”
He hummed and buried his face in the crook of my neck, breathing me in. His pace didn’t increase, instead, it was even slower than before. It was as if he wasn’t even moving and I let out a groan of frustration.
“Do you know how long I wanted to fuck you in this chair, Y/N?”
Noah flicked his tongue over my nipple. “I’ve sat in this chair and thought of you so many times. My hand wrapped around my cock and pictures of you up on my screen.”
My stomach flipped at his words, the image he painted beautifully on the canvas of my mind.
“Were you wearing these glasses?” I motioned to them with a raise of my brows.
“This doing it for you, angel? My glasses?” He chuckled before moving over to the other nipple, mimicking the same actions as before with his tongue.
Every one of my senses was burned alive. It was like this every time Noah and I were connected; our souls becoming one.
My nails scraped along his scalp as I pulled on his hair, yanking his head back so he could gaze up at me, our pace always in sync.
“You could wear a mask and it would still do it for me,” I moaned while rolling my hips against him.
“I can make that happen,” he promised before crashing his lips to mine in a hungry kiss.
It was one of pure adrenaline, his tongue fighting mine for dominance and his teeth sunk deep into my bottom lip. I shook in his embrace when I felt the vibrations of the black rose against my clit again.
“No-Noah,” I cried in ecstasy when the familiar heat spread to my core.
“Good girl,” he praised in between devouring my mouth. “Say my name again.”
“Noah,” I sang when my orgasm was on the crest, begging me to let go.
His cock was fucking into me with absolutley no remorse. The chair beneath us was creaking and I was sure we’d break it at any given moment. My breasts were pressed tightly against his chest and the sharp metal of his chain digging into my skin added more blissful pain. My body was pulled tight with tension, knowing any moment I would snap.
“You know what to do, angel,” Noah spoke huskily as his cock twitched inside of me when he smacked my ass. “Don’t make me fucking ask.”
Locking eyes with him, I cried out my orgasm as my body writhed in his tight grasp, and Noah created some space between us to glance down where our bodies connected. It was wet, more than usual, and his eyes snapped away from the soaked condom and lap.
“Angel,” his voice was deep, dropping an octave. “Did you just squirt?”
I couldn’t speak; my orgasm took every single ounce of energy out of me. Instead, I nodded while resting my forehead against his chest and smacked away the vibrator that was still held against my clit. The aftershocks were too much and I was afraid of crumbling in his embrace.
“So,” Noah grunted with a thrust.
“Fucking.”
Thrust.
“Hot.” He growled out his release, spilling into the condom, and held me tighter against him.
Gentle fingers grazed up and down my spine, as we both came down from our highs and I hummed in delight when Noah’s lips pressed a kiss to my forehead.
“I don’t think I could ever sit in this chair again without thinking of you,” he mused with a light chuckle.
Sitting up straighter, I tapped his cheek. He was still wearing those glasses and it made my pussy clench over his slightly limp cock.
“I wonder what else we can fuck on in your house to make you think of me,” I joked before climbing off of him.
Noah’s fingers gripped tighter into the flesh of my hips to keep me in place and he winked. “Let’s find out.”
The next morning, I woke to gentle kisses down my spine and I smiled in my sleep haze.
“Mm, good morning,” I grumbled into the pillow as I tucked it deep under my chin.
“How’d you sleep?”
Noah’s gruff and sleep-filled voice made my stomach twinge but then I internally groaned when the pain from last night started to creep back into my bones.
“I’m still sore after last night,” I sighed while turning over in bed to face him. He was freshly showered, with water droplets clinging to his hair, and wore clean clothes.
“I wasn’t too rough, was I?” He asked while brushing away the mess of hair from my face.
I shook my head with a lazy smile. “Not at all. I wanted all of that.”
To reassure Noah, I kissed his lips tenderly; my essence still lingered.
“Hungry?” He asked after pulling away.
“Starved! Someone kept me up all night,” I exaggerated while sitting up in bed, clutching the sheet to my naked body. “I’m going to shower quickly.”
Ten minutes later, I stepped into the kitchen just in time to see Noah. I could see the blood rushing to his soft and full cheeks, as he continued talking with the guys who had gotten home. The mortification of knowledge was evident.
Jolly, Michael, and Jesse.
“What’s going on?” I asked while stuffing my hands in my hoodie pocket.
Taking a closer look at Jolly, a bright red material that was hanging loosely on his shoulder caught my attention and I stifled my gasp behind my hand.
“Why was your swimsuit top hanging from the ceiling fan?” He questioned.
My eyes darted to Noah. “I thought you said you cleaned up!”
“I might have missed a few things,” he held up his hands in defense.
I ran inside, giggles bouncing off the walls, as Noah chased me and nearly slipped on the kitchen floor due to his wet feet.
“We can’t fuck in the Jacuzzi, Noah! The guys use it too,” I stood on the other side of the large kitchen island with my hands on my hips.
Noah wore a wicked smirk. “They won’t know, angel.”
I untied my swimsuit top and threw it up in the air, catching it on the ceiling fan in the kitchen.
“If you catch me, you can fuck me where ever you want.”
Michael came down the stairs with a troubled look in his eyes. “Why is there a folder on the computer in the studio labeled Y/N private?”
“Oi vey,” I pinched my eyes shut while Noah rubbed my back.
“You didn’t open it did you?” He asked.
“No,” Michael shook his head but then his shoulders dropped. “Do I even want to know?”
“Louder! Say it louder, angel!”
Noah grunted as he thrusted his cock into my pussy with such force, I screamed into the microphone.
“Noah! Don’t stop. Please!”
“Who do you belong to?” He demanded to know, sinking his teeth deep into my shoulder.
“YOU!” I cried out with my orgasm.
Jolly sighed while falling onto the couch and rubbed a hand over his tired eyes.
“Everything alright?” I questioned while sitting next to him.
He gave a half shrug. “Last night was rough for Astrid. She kept waking up with nightmares.”
My heart dropped, knowing that her father's death was bothering her more than she would admit to anyone; even Jolly.
“Has she talked with Dr. Poulos?”
“No,” he ran his hands over his long thighs. “She told me she’ll reach out when she’s ready.”
I patted his shoulder. “I’ll stop by Fika today and chat with her. I’m sure she’d like that.”
Jolly smiled. “Thanks, Y/N.”
The sound of rummaging around the fridge and a loud gasp made me turn my attention towards Jesse, who was holding up an empty crate.
“My strawberries!” He exasperated while running a hand through his curls. “These were from Matt’s garden. Did you guys have to eat all of them?”
Noah and I shared a look. “Sorry, man. They were delicious.”
“Noah,” I breathed while pulling on my bindings.
The cool granite beneath my warm skin brought shills to my body. I was laid spread out wide for him on the kitchen counter, blindfolded, and hands tied up above my head.
I couldn’t see him but felt when he bit into the fruit, its juices spilling over my clit, then his warm tongue was there to clean it up.
“Fucking divine,” Noah groaned.
Jesse tossed the empty container in the trash before grumbling something under his breath while sitting on the couch opposite Jolly and I. Noah was finishing breakfast. When Jolly shifted in his spot next to me, my heart leaped in my throat when I saw what he had in his hand.
“The mask, huh?” He smirked. “Didn’t think you’d be into the yellow one.”
“NOAH SEBASTIAN!” I bellowed. “Did you just stuff the mask in the cushion hoping no one would find it?”
He didn’t respond, simply humming along to the tune in his head.
Michael began cleaning up the scattered mess on the coffee table when something fell out of the small black bag in his hand.
A set of shiny grillz.
“So good,” I murmured while running my hands through Noah’s hair as I lay on the coffee table.
His dark almond eyes looked up at me as he continued the onslaught on my pussy with his tongue. The richness of his eyes stood out against the stark contrast of the yellow mask he wore. When he grazed his teeth over my clit, I hissed in slight pain.
“Shit, mochi!”
“Sorry, angel,” he whipped at his mouth, the shiny grillz on his teeth catching the light overhead.
The slight pain turned to arousal at the sight of him and I pushed his head back towards my clit. “Don’t fucking stop.”
“Are those,” Jolly leaned closer to Michael. “Are those your show grillz?”
“Fuck, they still look wet!” Michael dropped them to the table.
I groaned while sinking further into the couch, hiding my face behind my hands.
“Alright,” Noah sighed while setting down the spatula and I noticed his ears were beet red. “You guys are embarrassing Y/N! So I missed a few things, sue me.”
“I’d like to,” Jesse grumbled while crossing his arms. “Ate all my strawberries.”
“It’s alright,” I reassured them with a smile. “I’m sorry about the mess.”
Micahel stomped up the stairs. “I need to take a shower to scrub out the images of you and Y/N fucking all over the house.”
Standing up from the couch, I walked over to Noah and laid a soft kiss on his warm cheeks. “I think after breakfast we should head to the farmers market. Buy Jesse some replacement strawberries.”
“Might as well invite Matt,” Noah suggested.
I shook my phone in my hand. “Already on it.”
As I helped Noah set up the table with the breakfast spread he cooked, neither of us heard the conversation between Jolly and Jesse; who were watching us with a smile.
“You do know that when she moves in, it’s going to be like this all the time right?” Jesse chuckled.
“Yeah, but look how happy Noah is. He deserves this,” Jolly said.
NOAH
I bounced on the soles of my feet with excitement as I waited in the lobby, hoping to find that familiar face in the crowd of people. Y/N was joining me on the road for the last week of the tour and after being away from her for two weeks, my soul was yearning to feel complete again. This was the longest we’d gone without seeing each other and all of our Facetime calls paled in comparison to actually seeing her beautiful face.
Throughout the crowd, a spot of aquamarine hair rushed past, only to stop when she recognized it was me.
“Hey, Bryan said you were handing out the key cards?” The woman adjusted the camera bag over her shoulder while gripping her suitcase with her free hand.
Our photographer fill-in for Lana.
She tried to give me a small smile but knowing what she’d gone through the last two weeks, outside of work, I couldn’t help but feel a small pang of guilt for what I was about to do. It’d been a plan of mine and the guy's since the other day, hoping it would fix the issue that had been plaguing her.
“Yeah,” I pulled out a familiar keycard, one I had just handed to Matt moments ago, and gave it to her. “We’re thinking of dinner and karaoke tonight if you’re interested.”
She tucked a strand of blue hair behind her ear. “Y/N’s coming, right?”
I couldn’t stop the goofy smile that spread to my lips. “Yeah, she should be here any minute.”
“Cool, count me in. No offense but I’m sick of all the testosterone,” she giggled before giving me a wave and heading over to the elevators.
“If this plan doesn’t work, I’m going to lock them up in a closet to resolve whatever they have going on,” I muttered under my breath.
“Talking to yourself, mochi?”
Swirling on my heels, I gazed down at Y/N who was smiling and wearing the communal gray Chief sweater.
“Hi, angel,” I quickly wrapped my arms around her and breathed in her familiar scent.
Y/N buried her face in my chest and her hands dug at the back of my shirt. “I’ve missed you.”
Tilting her chin up, I left a deep kiss on her lips, not caring if anyone around us saw.
“I missed you too,” I brushed my nose along hers, and with my arm wrapped around her, I began leading her toward the elevators.
“You dyed your hair?” I asked as we stopped in front of the closed doors.
She wrapped her arms around my midsection and squeezed. “My roots were coming in and I needed it to look fresh for the photos. But speaking of hair colors. The girl you were talking to, was that-?”
I nodded with a sigh. “Yep. They’re still not talking though.”
As we stepped onto the elevator and the doors closed behind us, I held onto Y/N’s suitcase as she looked up at me, still wrapped in my free arm.
“Did you do what I suggested?” Y/N asked.
“Yep, they’re sharing a room right now. So if we hear yelling they’re most likely working things out,” I said while stepping off the elevator and heading towards the hotel room.
“YOU’RE INSUFFERABLE!”
“REALLY? LAST TIME I CHECKED, YOU LOVED IT WHEN MY LIPS WERE ON YOURS!”
Y/N came to a stop in front of our door and pointed to the room next to ours. “I’m guessing that’s Matt’s room?”
“Yep,” I popped the ‘P’ as the door clicked open.
Once we were inside, I let Y/N get settled with unpacking her things as I lounged on the bed to watch with a loving gaze. Sometimes I couldn’t believe that after everything we’d gone through to get to this point, Y/N still wanted me.
I fucked up; a lot.
I made mistakes but those mistakes didn’t make me.
I fought with myself, with her, with others, to finally get here. To finally have Y/N as mine and secretly in that moment, I vowed to continue to prove to her how much I loved her and how much she meant to me.
A buzzing on the bed pulled my gaze away from Y/N’s beauty and saw her phone lit up with a message.
“Can you check it for me?” She asked before stepping into the bathroom.
Mom: Y/N, I’ve been trying to get in touch with you for the last week. Call me. I have something important to talk to you about. You can’t be busy with this job of yours so call me back.
“It’s your mom,” I informed with furrowed brows. “She’s been trying to get in touch with you?”
Y/N sighed while plopping down on the bed next to me. “Yeah. It’s probably she got a new job or met some new guy that she's going to get bored with after a week. It’s nothing important.”
I’d known Y/N for years now and I also knew when she was keeping something from me.
I brushed away the hair that fell loose from her bun. “Is there something else going on? You know you can talk to me, angel.”
Her eyes shone as she gazed up at me, laying a soft kiss on my palm. “I know, mochi. I know. I just don’t feel like getting lectured right now. I’m finally here with you, I don’t want her to ruin it.”
“Alright,” I eventually nodded, and for the time being ignored the way her face fell when she deleted the text message from her mom.
Y/N motioned to the wall opposite of us, where Matt’s room was.
“Do you think they’ll hook up?”
I snorted a laugh. “What’s with you setting up our friends?”
She shrugged. “I just want him to be happy. I want our friends to have what we have.”
“So you’re saying you’re happy?” I rested my forehead against hers, breathing in the familiar scent of her peach body wash.
“I am very happy,” she breathed before kissing my lips. “What about you?”
“Very,” a kiss to her lips.
“Very.”
Another kiss.
“Happy.”
Another kiss.
When her giggles filled the room, my heart stuttered in my chest. “I love you, Y/N.”
She twirled a strand of my hair around her finger. “I love you too, Noah.”
I laid there with her in my arms for a long time, the never-ending silence becoming a bit of comfort to us. We could lay next to each other for hours, not saying a word to each other, but we both knew how much we loved each other.
“Oh before I forget,” Y/N removed herself from my tight grasp, and her voice carried from the bathroom. “I brought some facemasks. I thought we could stay in and relax. I know you have a long day of rehearsals and the show tomorrow.”
Facemasks.
Hotel room.
Suddenly there was a vice grip around my throat, caging in the oxygen I was desperate to take back. Its large claws dug into my jugular, making the room tilt on its axis. I couldn’t center on my breathing, I couldn’t focus on anything in front of me.
“I didn’t bring any nail polish this time,” Y/N’s giggle barely broke through the haze. “And I can’t braid your hair.”
Nearly stumbling over the suitcases on the ground, I rushed past Y/N just as she stepped out of the bathroom and let the door to the hotel room slam behind me. The air in the hallway of the hotel was thicker, nearly making it impossible to catch my breath. The tight grip around my lungs and heart would not let up.
"I know what I feel. It’s not you, it’s me, Noah."
I shook my head furiously when the past began to creep in.
"No. Fuck, angel! Stop! The future hasn't even happened yet. Please, don't-what do you need to happen?"
Y/N’s bottom lip trembled as a broken sob clawed its way through her throat. "I-I think we need to remain friends right now. I can't-I can't get lost in you, Noah. It's so fucking easy to. I think we need space."
How she looked that night, moments before leaving me, continued to haunt me.
"I-I don't fucking want that, Y/N. I just want you!” My voice bellowed.
"Noah, please understand where I'm coming from," she begged.
"Angel-I. Please, just-," I eventually sighed in defeat.
Her broken eyes shined with her tears. "I'm going to head out."
I dug my palms into my eyes as I stood in the middle of the hallway, trying to stop letting my mind fall back into the past. All it took was two fucking words and I was back to that shell of a man I used to be.
Face masks.
I immediately flooded to where I was before all this. I felt like a scolded child with aging wounds.
Embarrassing.
Why did I just do that? Why did I leave the room for air? When the air I needed was back in the room? The emotional hurricane was in full force today. On the surface, it’s joking and light, but then it wants to pull me into the vortex. With each jibe, I feel the winds clipping wings of my own. I can’t allow it.
I refused.
I won’t circle the fucking drain. I began to feel my body relax and my voice flowed out calmly, instead of me being pulled in.
I decided I needed to inhale the air I could never survive without.
“Keaton,” I cried softly while rubbing at the ache in my chest. “I need you, man. Please tell me everything will be alright.”
With the feeling of someone holding me upright, a soft breeze blew through my hair in the middle of the hotel hallway. A door down the hall opened, catching my attention immediately was a man wearing an all too familiar band t-shirt.
Too Close To Touch.
Along with the soft touch encasing me, I let out a quiet hum as a haunting flow of lyrics poured out of me.
“If you still want to sing, fill in the blanks we need. You can do it through me while you're gone.”
Then as quickly as those arms wrapped around me, they were gone and I felt alone in the hallway. But not before a soft voice whispered in my ear.
It’s okay.
Knocking on the hotel room door, realizing I didn’t have my key, I saw Y/N’s dark eyes staring daggers into me. All that inner rage inside those beautiful eyes made the guilt for walking away from her eat away at me even further; I deserved it.
When the frustration builds and I think I might explode, I have to remember to take a deep breath. So many times I’ve wanted to say things, or say anything. It was a long process with learning how to deal with it.
Her nostrils flared as I gently walked past her into the hotel room. Y/N needed to hear my explanation. I was ready to move forward. Reaching for a life I so badly yearned for with her. Here she was, in front of me. She was mine and she loved me.
Say something, you idiot!
“Angel-.” I began.
“What the fuck was that?” She whipped her head back at the door.
Oh shit, she’s mad.
The voice in my head didn’t sound like mine. Instead, it sounded like an old friend.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have walked out on you like that. It’s just when you mentioned face masks and braids, my mind went back to a place, a darker place,” my hands shook as I stuffed them in my sweater pocket.
The anger in Y/N’s eyes vanished when it clicked for her what moment I was talking about.
“Mochi,” her voice wavered. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for you to go back to that night. I know how hard it was for you, for both of us. I just thought we could recreate that night, the positives, and make up for the negatives.”
I linked our hands together to pull her into my chest, laying a chaste kiss on her lips.
“I’m ready to create many positive memories with you, angel.”
“Good,” she gave a small nod. “But next time something like this bothers you, please talk to me. Because you can't just run from sadness when it gets too hard to stay.”
“Really?” I snorted. “You’re using my lyrics on me?”
“Did it work?”
I wanted to kiss that hopeful smile off her face.
Instead, I winked and then pressed my hips into her, my cock brushing along her pussy. “You tell me.”
“You know,” her fingers danced through my hair. “I do miss a few things about that night.”
I cocked a brow. “Yeah?”
Y/N stood on her tiptoes to brush her lips across mine. “I missed how I rode your cock while pulling on your braids.”
I shook my hair in her face. “You can still pull, angel.”
With one quick scoop, I had her in the air for a few moments before her body fluttered to the bed like the angel she was; her giggles bouncing off the walls. I was on her in a flash, attacking her lips with mine. Ravishing them like a man starved, wanting to lick up every last drop of the meal put out in front of him. Her tongue always molded perfectly with mine and Y/N hummed in delight when she tasted me.
“Shit, mochi,” she moaned while arching her neck back as I attacked the sweet spot between her shoulder and neck.
My cock twitched underneath my sweats and I rutted into her thigh. “Angel, I missed you.”
She reciprocated the feelings by kissing me again and slipping her hands underneath my sweater to drag her nails down the tattoos on my stomach. I shivered under the touch, loving the feeling of the burn her nails left behind, and I stripped her of her clothes, me following suit—all the while our lips never left each other.
Her skin on mine felt like the wings of an angel; soft and almost incandescent.
Her lips were like honey, sweet and sticky with gloss.
The arousal that I gathered with my fingers and sucked clean had a lingering tangy taste, something I found myself wanting more of.
A scent and taste that was distinctively Y/N.
“I love you,” I vowed in between kisses while I pumped my fingers in and out of her, using my other hand to lock her hands above her head.
“I love you,” she keened when my knuckle brushed over that spot.
The last time we shared a hotel bed, it ended with two broken souls, desperate to be molded back together. They spent months yearning to find each other again and now that they were connected again, we both refused to let something so minuscule as face masks ruin it.
READER
“Noah, stop!” I giggled when his lips brushed along the shell of my ear.
“Please, angel,” his gruff voice begged as his arms wrapped around me from behind.
I turned in his embrace, linking my fingers behind his neck, and marveled at those almond eyes I adored so much.
“No, Folio and Michelle are going to be here any minute,” I reminded him.
Noah adjusted the glasses on his nose with a pout. He woke up this morning with irritated eyes and not wanting to make it worse with contacts, he opted to wear his glasses.
Not that I minded, it reminded me of the time in his computer chair.
The tour ended a few days ago and now that all of us were back home, we decided to meet up at the local aquarium so Folio could finally introduce us to his girlfriend. But Noah, however, had other plans; ones that involved us sneaking into the backseat of his SUV so he could fuck my throat.
Tempting.
“He’s been talking about introducing us to Michelle for two months now, are we sure today is the day?” Noah asked.
I shrugged while pressing a kiss to his cheek. “I think so. Look how nervous he looks!”
Both of us gazed over to the other end of the lobby of the aquarium where Folio stood alone, hands shaking at his sides. We could practically see his heart jumping out of his chest due to his nerves.
“He’s never been this nervous before,” Noah murmured.
“Can you blame him? Look what she’s about to walk into,” I waved a hand at our large group.
Chase and Malcolm were looking at the large tank in the lobby that housed a variety of fish. Chase had his hand on Malcolm's lower back as he whispered something in his ear.
Jolly and Astrid stood a few feet away from us, a small smile pulling at her lips when he braided her long white hair for her.
Jesse and Maxxine stood with Davis, Michael, and Matt, conversing about something we couldn’t hear. But I watched with careful eyes as Matt’s gaze kept darting back to one certain area in the lobby; where a blue-haired girl was currently talking with Bryan.
Most likely about cameras.
When Matt’s eyes locked with mine, I motioned with a finger over to the girl but he rolled his eyes playfully before going back to talking with Michael.
Nicholas had sauntered up to Folio, giving his shoulder a reassuring squeeze.
There were a lot of us in our group but we were family. All of us.
“Folio! How did you and Michelle meet?” Davis questioned when all of us met in the middle of the lobby.
“At the Harley shop,” he chuckled, his earring shaking with the rumble of his body. “She wore her Motley Crue shirt and these cheetah flare suede pants. Her lips were red as fuck, I’ll remember those lips anywhere.”
All of us could hear the dreamy tone in his voice when he spoke about her and how the first thing that caught his attention was how she stood up to the man behind the counter who almost refused her service because he thought she didn’t know anything about bikes.
“I thought she was going to kick this guy's ass until I stepped in. We hit it off right away and she asked if I wanted to visit this Mexican ice cream shop around the block,” Folio smiled.
Just then someone walked up behind him, wrapping his arms around him, and I could see all the nerves slip out of his fingers.
“Hi, sweetheart,” he grabbed her hand and brought it to his lips with a kiss.
Michelle smiled, showcasing off those red lips. “Hi, cinnamon.”
“Cinnamon? Really?” Matt teased when Folio’s cheeks turned a deep crimson.
“Everyone, this is Michelle. My girlfriend,” he said with a proud smile.
While all the introductions happened, I gave her a big welcoming hug, I left Noah with a quick kiss on his lips.
“Where are you going?” He pouted while reaching for my hips again.
I giggled and playfully smacked his hands away. “I’m going to talk to Matt quickly.”
Immediately Noah understood and dismissed me with a gentle pat on my ass. I found Matt standing a few feet away from the group of girls, his own dreamy smile on his face as he watched her carefully.
“Hey,” I tipped the rim of his hat. “It’s rude to stare.”
“Like you’re the one to talk,” he playfully shoved me. “With all the staring you and Noah did before you got together.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “Very funny, Dierkes. I just came over to see how things are going with a certain fairy?”
Suddenly as if she heard me speak of her, that familiar airy laughter reached Matt, who clutched at his heart.
“I’m so fucked,” he admitted with a slight lift of his lips.
#tina talks#noah sebastian#just pretend noah sebastian#bad omens#fallenvvitchcult#noah sebastian x reader#noah sebastian and reader
181 notes
·
View notes
Text
group: ateez
pairing: idol!hongjoong x fem!reader
genre: angst, smut, oneshot
trope: lovers to strangers ? to lovers again *head scratch*
rating: 18+ MDNI <<< don’t make me block
word count: 6.3k
warning: angst, mild cussing, mention of death (no one dies or plans on it), argumentS (yes, plural), mention of cheating, pregnancy on two occasions (not reader), mention of an abusive partner (neither mc), if i missed any, please lmk
synopsis: an argument between you and your significant other leads you to ponder on whether the man you’re with is actually the one indicated for you.
song playlist recommendation: “west coast” “young and beautiful” “video games” “say yes to heaven” all by Lana Del Rey
a/n: i know for pairing i put “idol” hj but it’s only alluded that he is. there is no actual scene in which it shows he is an idol, just small mentions of it. don’t get your hopes up if that’s what you were looking for. also, this is, in NO WAY a depiction of the artist. think of this more of an au than a fanfic if it helps. i really hope you enjoy:)
special thanks to: @luvt0kki for proof reading🙂↕️🫶🏼 oh and my sister for putting me in such angsty mood (by playing lana del rey in the car), bringing this piece to life. but she’s not on tumblr and let’s keep it that way. oh and the rain outside for pushing me to post this. i swear the mixture of rain, a good playlist, and a comfortable bed is such a good cocktail for writing.
navigation ・❥・ masterlist
Waking up in the arms of your lover on a lazy Sunday morning was on of the best feelings ever. You cuddled your face deeper into the crook of his neck, taking in his scent as the morning sun began seeping through the white curtains of your room. “That tickles,” he let out a chuckle. “I’ve got to take advantage of you allowing this skin-ship,” you retorted, both of you just smiling, allowing yourselves to be engulfed in each other’s embrace. “We have to get up,” you grumbled while pulling the covers off of your body, the cold rushing in quickly, creating goosebumps on your skin. “I don’t want to. Let’s just sleep in today,” Hongjoong whined as he got up. “You’re already out of bed. Tell you what, after we finish cleaning, we can have ourselves a small movie marathon, yeah?” “With cuddles?” His eyes sparkled. “With cuddles,” you laughed at his hypocrisy of “hating”skin-ship. It had became a habit of his to spend the weekend at your place. On Sundays, you two would clean your entire apartment together just before Hongjoong had to go back to the dorms for work. This week, however, you both had been busy and only had Saturday night and Sunday to yourselves, making the cleaning all the more dreadful.
“I say, we just do the laundry,” Hongjoong was still trying to negotiate with you. Missing your boyfriend’s presence, you were quick to give in, “okay fine.” Both dressed in comfortable clothes, you grabbed your load and the sheets, making your way to his car. On the way to the laundromat, he received a call that happened to appear on his car screen to which he declined. The all too familiar number kept calling. “Just pick up,” you rolled your eyes as you answered the call on his screen. A woman’s voice was heard, “Joong, I think I’m in trouble,” she cried through the phone. Hongjoong glanced your way and back to the road, “I’ll have to call you later, I’m a bit preoccupied right now.” Your mood had turned sour in an instant, you knew in a few seconds he’d be running to her rescue. “Love—“ “I know, you have to go to her,” you cut him off as he arrived at the laundromat. “I shouldn’t take long,” he got off to help you carry the load inside. “See you in a bit, okay? I love you.” You didn’t reply, you couldn’t. I mean, how could you? Your boyfriend of almost three years was still running behind his so called “best friend” when she needed him. “Love, please don’t be mad, it might be serious.” He tried soothing you, but you were too angry with him. “Serious? Hongjoong, I’ve seen you drop everything for that woman. Don’t think I’ve forgotten how you practically ran out of your studio when she called. But Lord forbid I need you while you’re at work. I called you to hang out Friday afternoon and all I got was a sad excuse of how you’re stuck at work. And I get it, maybe you needed to get your creativity out onto a piece of paper and get it started. See, I kept thinking that to myself, making excuses for you. I thought you and I were in a relationship, not you and her.” You began walking off, trying to not cause an even bigger scene in public. “It’s not like that. You know it’s not like that. Please love,” he reached out for your hand. “Please what? You want me to be understanding of the situation? Because trust me, I have tried these past two, almost three years. Even before we started dating. I just can’t anymore,” you half whispered the last part. “What?” “I can’t anymore Hongjoong,” you spoke up this time, “I don’t want this anymore. I don’t want to be second to no one in your heart.” “But you’re not,” he held both your hands. “Oh but I am,” you pulled your hands away, busying them with the load that you were to wash. “Look, I have to go. We’ll talk about this at your place later.” “No. I’ll just finish cleaning on my own. Just go straight to the dorms afterwards. I’m not counting on you to come back.” You waited for him to fight for you in any way. You begged inside of you for him to understand you and stay. But of course, like a fool, you sat there waiting for your clothes to wash after seeing his car drive off. All of this ripping away the feeling you had not even 2 hours ago.
With a heavy heart, you finished cleaning the rest of your apartment. You had cried as you folded his clothes neatly, placing them in the drawer you had cleared out for him. Everyone had warned you about this. At the time, you were so naive, seeing him only through pink glasses, wanting so desperately to feel loved, which you did. He had made you feel so important when he worried about your wellbeing, sending you money so you could buy yourself whatever it was you needed. He had always checked up on you when you were sick, even calling days off to go and personally take care of you. All of this making you think that you were the one he loved, so it didn’t matter if every now and then he ran off to help his best friend, given their history. You couldn’t blame him for your obliviousness when he had been so honest with you from the start about their friendship. “She lived in my neighborhood so we would play a lot when we were younger but only gotten closer at age 14 when we started walking home from school together. She opened up to me a few years later when her parents were having a messy divorce. She really just needed a shoulder to cry on, and I was there to provide comfort. I see her more as a younger sister than anything, I promise you have nothing to worry about.” You laughed at yourself remembering his words seeing as he’s with her right now instead of with you.
You plopped yourself on your couch, in front of the television, eating a spoonful of ice cream to help with the sadness. The doorbell rang, making you jump. You reached out for your phone, wiping your tears away, to check the time. It was already past 8:00 pm, with no messages on your notifications; you certainly weren’t expecting anyone at this time. “Love, please open the door,” your heart clenched. You quietly rushed to turn off the TV, making your apartment pitch black. “Don’t pretend you’re not here, I saw the light of the TV turn off.” You curled yourself back into a ball on your couch. He had the pin to your apartment door, so why didn’t he just come in? If he really wanted to come inside to talk, he would have, but he never came in on his own. You waited until he left, which only sadden you even more. Only realizing now that he wasn’t fighting for you, for your love, or your relationship, making you conclude that he doesn’t love you the way he claims. The way you loved him. That if it came down to it, you were ready to lay your life for him, but was he willing to do the same? This only saddened you more. You reached out for your phone to call him, but the longer you stared at his contact, the more you thought about how he chose to leave instead of staying to talk things out.
You no longer had the energy to deal with this. Even if your heart ached, you knew you had to end it with him, for your sake. The thought making you feel stuffy; you planned for a late night run to help you muster up the courage to end the relationship. Making your way out of your apartment, you stumbled upon something, or more like someone. It was too dark to make out who it was. Afraid to take a step closer, you waved your hand in front of the motion censor light. With it illuminating right outside your door, you were finally able to see. Noticing a sleeping Hongjoong, your eyes soften as you reach out for him, “wake up.” You shook him, but he didn’t budge. “Hongjoong,” you shook him again abruptly, waking him up. “Y/N, I’m so sorry,” he stood up, unaware of his surroundings, that is until he saw you, “please, can we talk?” “Let’s just talk tomorrow,” you sighed. “Can you drive? Do you need me to call your manager? A taxi?” You pulled out your phone. “No,” he placed his hand over yours to stop you from calling whoever it was, “I just really want to talk. I want to fix this.” Hesitating a bit, you decided to let him into the apartment, figuring you should hear what he had to say. After all, he did wait outside for you when you thought he wasn’t willing to fight for your relationship.
You two settled down on the couch after you fetched him some water. “I really am sorry. I realize now how you must be feeling with all of this. I’m sorry I made you feel like you were second to her.” “Then why do you still go running after her? Why do you prioritize her so much? Her parents’ shitty ass divorce happened years ago. She doesn’t need to be coddled anymore! She has a boyfriend for fucks sake, why does she have to go out looking for you?” You got up the couch. “Love, it’s not that simple! I wish I could explain it all to you, but that would be an invasion of her privacy!” “Bullshit Hongjoong! This is all complete and utter bull shit! Why are you so fixated on her and her needs? What about mine? What about when I need my boyfriend here? To come coddle me?” “Really? When have you ever needed coddling? Every time you feel down, you push me away! You want to be independent so bad! Maybe you should be!” “What?” Afraid of where this was leading, your eyes began to tear up. “Maybe we should break up…” he looked down at the floor. “No! You don’t get to break up with me over this! I do! I’ve put up with your bullshit friendship with that woman, so I get to do this! I am the one breaking up with you! I’m the one letting you go!” You abusively stabbed your chest with your index finger as your eyes let loose of the tears. Ironically, his phone began ringing. He took one quick glance at it before putting it back inside his pocket. “For fuck’s sake, just fucking go to her already! Run to her as you so desperately want to!” He just looked at you with a sad expression. “Just be honest with me,” you looked at him with pleading eyes, “do you love her?” You were honestly afraid of his answer. “I do, but—“ you cut him off after getting the answer you expected of him, but expecting it didn’t make you hurt any less. “Get out! Just fucking get out Hongjoong! I don’t ever want to see you again!” You threw the water bottle at him as he made his way out. He knew you like the back of his palm. He knew he fucked up and that no explanation, not that he could give you one, would help you two recover from this. So he did the only thing he could do that night: to disappear from your life as much as he could.
As much as it pained him, he found himself in his car driving off to his friend’s. You couldn’t possibly fathom what had happened that night, or why he had to urgently leave. But he had no one to blame except himself for always running away from you when his friend needed him. Hitting the steering wheel as he drove, angry at himself for letting the best thing he’s ever had go. “Fuck!” he screamed into the silence of his car, coming to a complete stop when he approached a red light. Resting his hands on the steering wheel, followed by his head. He couldn’t comprehend why his heart hurt so much that he wished to rip it out of his chest. The tears that flowed down his face a burning sensation. He wanted to give up completely in that moment. To just turn back time to where the two of you were still in the warmth of your bedsheets, wishing he hadn’t woken up. All this felt surreal, to go from being in his happy place with you to living a nightmare of having to steer clear from you. Even if he moved across the world, the distance wouldn’t be enough. He’d still want to run back into your arms and make everything alright. A car honked behind him as the light had turned green, he wiped his tears along with his runny nose before he proceeded to drive.
Stepping onto his friend’s doorstep, he knocked on the door. “Hey, you don’t look so good. Are you okay?” She reached out to cup his face but Hongjoong shooed her hand away. “I only came to tell you to not call me ever again. I’m done.” Hongjoong walked away. “Wait! I can’t raise this kid alone! Please Joong!” She hugged him from the back. “You can and you will. You’ll be fine. And stop calling me that, we’re not in a relationship for you to be calling me by my nickname.” He undid her grip from his waist and left her standing on her doorstep. Even though he wanted to run to you and tell you he completely cut his friend from his life, he knew he couldn’t. Nothing would make you take him back after he hurt you so badly. All he could do now was drive back to the dorms.
Meanwhile, you were a mess. It had only been a few minutes since he left but you could only assume he went rushing into her inviting arms. That he was happy while you were miserable on your bed. It was already past midnight when you felt a migraine creeping in, knowing you’d have to call in for work in a few hours, you decided to put on another movie. The migraine, however, won and made you fall asleep in the middle of the movie. The only thing that woke you up the next day was your coworker who had worriedly called your phone about 100 times, that being an exaggeration of your own. “Hey babes, are you okay? You didn’t come in today, did something happen? Did you and Hongjoong fight?” A stinging sensation arose in you as you heard his name. Your burning eyes couldn’t produce any more tears, as if you were dried out of your liquids. “Uh, no, I’m just feeling sick today. I should be feeling better by tomorrow,” you lied. “Okay, if I don’t hear from you soon, I’m coming over.” You let out a forceful chuckle, “okay,” and hung up the phone. Forgetting to close your curtains last night, the sun, brighter than most mornings, illuminated your room. You took this as a sign to get up and do something productive around your house. You sighed when you walked around remembering that you had just finished cleaning it yesterday, instead you went into your closet with a gym bag. You began packing every little thing Hongjoong had left behind in your apartment, down to his toothbrush. You decided it was time to take this step since you were serious about not seeing him again. It started off with you folding his clothes neatly into the bag, but as you came across the clothes you gifted him, you began just throwing the clothes in there. The room only became suffocating the longer you stayed in there to pack his belongings. Taking a break from it all, you went to the kitchen, preparing a small snack with water to replenish from your dehydration. You sat on the small dining table, that’s when you took notice of your picture frames displayed around your apartment. Most of them were pictures of you and your now ex. You just couldn’t get a break from all of this so you made it your mission to finish packing by today. After your very needed break, you grabbed all of your pictures, throwing them [carefully] in the bag. Only keeping your favorite one hidden in your closet, the pain of discarding it encouraging you to do so. What you initially thought would be one bag, quickly turned into four. This shocked you as you hadn’t noticed how deeply rooted he was in your life.
The ache in your heart only grew bigger when you saw the building to his dorms appearing bigger in your sight. You were too much of a coward to confront him at work, so you decided to drop off the bags at the dorms, knowing well he wouldn’t be there. As you stepped out of the elevator, his roommate emerged from their dorm, flashing you a big smile as he recognized you. “Hey Y/N,” the man you knew as Wooyoung waved to you. You forced a smile back with a wave. “Awe man, you just missed Hongjoong. He went to work really early this morning. Something about needing to write down lyrics for a tune he came up with last night.” He looked down to the bags you had placed by your feet, “is that for him?” “Uh, yes. Do you mind putting it inside?” You picked them up, walking closer to him. “Yeah, no problem,” he walked to you to help you carry the bags, taking all four from you. “I have to go now,” you smiled and turned around. “See you soon,” you stopped in your tracks his words catching you off-guard, “yeah, see you…” you couldn’t bring yourself to say ‘soon’ knowing fully well it was a lie. The taxi ride back home was all too quiet, but as it turns out, it was all you needed. You felt like you could breathe again now that you got some closure. What you didn’t know was that it wasn’t the closure you needed.
Once inside your apartment, you were determined to fill the void that he left behind. Now that you no longer needed the drawer, you contemplated whether to throw it out or to store it. Your heart not fully being able to take in the pain of you two being over, you decided that the latter was less painful. As you moved the furniture out to the living room, the doorbell rang. Cautiously, you made your way to the door, hoping it wasn’t him coming to grovel again. “Babes, open up. You haven’t answered your calls and I’m only growing worried for you. Talk to me, yeah?” Relieved to hear your friend’s voice through the door, you opened the door for her. Strangely, your emotions overcame you when you saw her and you fell to the floor, a crying mess. No longer being able to contain your sobs along with tears that appeared out of nowhere. “Oh sweetie,” your friend joined you on the floor, hugging your body, trying her best to provide you with comfort. She could tell something was really wrong with the way you have never showed any sign of “weakness” in front of her. “I fucking loved him so much, why am I the one who gets betrayed this way? Was I never good enough for him? Or was I just too blind to see he was never going to choose me over her?” “No sweetie, don’t blame yourself. Don’t beat yourself up over this. He is the blind one for choosing her countless of times when he had a treasure in front of him. Trust me babes, he’ll regret his decisions one day. It’ll come back to haunt him when he least expects it.” She helped your zombie-like state off the floor. “Have you ate?” She sat you down at your dinner table when you shook your head. “Let’s get some food in you, yeah?” She looked through your fridge, taking a few ingredients out to whip up something for you. You thanked the universe for sending you an angel like your friend. She had been there when you needed her the most, helping you recover from your heartbreak. You felt indebted with her for life. Jokingly, you told her you’d be her first-born’s god-mother. Funny how the universe works, the face on your friend’s face only shocking you, “how did you know?” She looked back to you. “What? What are you talking about?” Trying to understand what she meant, you looked at her. Only when your eyes fell on her hand that was on her lower stomach did you realize what she was trying to tell you. “I came here to tell you, but you took me by surprise with your situation. I didn’t want to make this about me.” Running to her, you went to hug her, crying once again, “I’m so happy for you.”
Time passed you by so fast. Suddenly you were attending the baby shower you had planned for your friend. As you walked through the venue, checking with the guests to make sure they were comfortable, making sure they didn’t need anything, your friends approached you. “Hey, you look good,” one of your friends mentioned. “Thank you. You do as well,” you complimented back with a smile. “Sorry to bring this up, but you are okay now, right?” Your other friend asked. You knew she was only concerned about you, but you couldn’t help but wish she hadn’t brought it up just as you felt like you were finally healing from the pain that Hongjoong left you with. “Yeah, I’m doing so much better now.” “I’m here whenever you’re ready,” their mutual guy friend added. He had been trying to get with you the moment your friends introduced him to you. You were thankful to your friends for trying to put you out there, frankly, you weren’t ready for that yet. You let out a playful laugh, “you’ll be the first to know when I’m ready,” you half meant it. You considered to give him a chance once you were ready to get back out there. He was a good guy with you, much different than him… He made sure to go at your pace. He wanted nothing more than for you to be comfortable around him. Leading to him often waiting for you to initiate any contact, but you never really did. You didn’t want to lead him on unless you were sure of your feelings. You managed to slip away from your friends and went to the bar that your celebrated friend insisted on having. Her excuse to you was that, “just because I can’t drink doesn’t mean the rest can’t. Just add it for them. For you. You never know, you just might need a drink or two.” She just so happened to be right. Your energy depleted, you felt the need to get a drink. Right as you received your drink, your heart dropped lower than the pit of your stomach as you caught a glimpse of a man who looked a little too much like him. In a discreetly manner, you followed him, only to be even more disheartened. It truly was him, and he was with her, except now she had a huge belly, had to be nearing birth. Leaving your heart a reopened wound. Out of all things you could have imagined, the idea of him cheating never crossed your mind until now. You gave him too much credit because even seeing them in front of you, looking at each other so fondly, you still couldn’t help but make excuses. Maybe he didn’t cheat. Maybe he only got with her after he lost you. There was no way that what he felt for you was never real. Except you have all the proof you needed right in front of you. With that, again, you felt a single teardrop fall onto your cheek. Still staring at them both, finally noticing when Hongjoong turned around to see you, making eye contact with you. He was the first to break it by walking away only after whispering something into the woman’s ear. You knew you were the one who told him you didn’t want to see him anymore, but you wanted an explanation of what you had just witnessed, so you followed.
It wasn’t that he tried fleeing away from you, willingly, at least. He only wanted to ensure he kept his promise of staying away from you, as per your request. He wanted to stay so bad, to go up to you and hold you again as he used to 9 moths ago, but he knew he couldn’t. He knew that his presence alone would only taunt you, more-so that he was accompanied by his friend. He mentally cursed himself as he made his way to the parking lot, beating himself up remembering your expression, he knew he had hurt you once again. He had told himself he wouldn’t contact you first, even if he was so close a couple of times. Only until you contacted him first would he talk to you. Not for petty reasons, nothing like that, but instead to allow you the space you needed. Even if it meant you would never contact him. A sudden thought popped up in his head. Without a second wasted, he went against all he promised himself and went running back inside the building. He needed to clear something up.
You had walked around the whole building before giving up when you couldn’t find him. You leaned on the hallway outside of the venue, catching your breath. The feeling you were feeling right now contradicting what you had previously told your friends. You clenched your chest, trying to keep your composure to go back into the party. You made your way back inside the venue, but your heart and legs had another idea, pulling you away from the venue. Speed walking towards the entrance of the building only stopping when you saw Hongjoong running inside. You both paused, locking your eyes with each other. Everything about that moment felt like a movie, down to the way that time seemed to slow down. You approached each other slowly, neither daring to break the silence, that is until you saw a tear rolling down his cheek. “Why are you here? I didn’t add you to the list of invitees.” You hadn’t meant to be harsh, but you only had one thing that you wanted to really say. Instead of beating around the bush, “congrats by the way. On the baby that is.” Hongjoong shook his head, “it’s not mine. That’s why I came back inside looking for you. To clear that up.” He walked closer to you, keeping his eyes on you attentively, making sure to not scare you away. “I figured that’s what you thought when you saw me. Your expression gave it away,” he stopped mere feet away from you. “I’m ready to tell you everything. The reason I kept going to her. Personal matters and all. No more keeping stuff from you. Of course, only if you’re willing to hear me. But not here, I don’t want to cause a scene at your friend’s party. And to answer your question, she was the one who invited me.” Hesitant at first, you saw the fondness in his eyes, which is why you followed him to his car, making your way to his dorm. You couldn’t bring yourself to look at him, instead you settled for staring out the window. “You do realize you left her at the party, right?” You rested your head on the window, still looking outside of it as it began raining. He sighed, “I’m sure she’ll find a way back home.” His response shocked you, making you sit up in your seat. “Don’t be too shocked,” an inaudible chuckle left his throat, “she’s really not my top priority.” He quickly glanced at you and your expression before driving into the parking garage.
Sitting on the couch across from you, he cleared his throat, forcing you to face him, “can I just start off by saying I’m sorry,” he looked dejected. “I truly have been miserable without you, I hope you believe me.” ”Even if I do believe you, that doesn’t change the fact that you ran after her countless of times while being with me.” “I know,” he sighed, bringing himself closer to the edge of the couch. “I know this isn’t much of a rational excuse, but you have to understand, in the moment I felt that I had to.” You let out an exasperated laugh, “you had to?” “Yes… her boyfriend was very abusive. The night you and I argued, she had called me crying because she had found out she was carrying his child. Not wanting her kid to meet the same fate as her, she decided to leave her house, to stop the cycle before it became more serious. But she was too afraid to take that step on her own. She needed a push, and a place to stay at in the meantime. I helped her pack all of her things that day and took her to one of her friend’s house. Both me and her friend encouraged her to report him to the police, though, they didn’t help much, we were able to put a restraining order on her boyfriend that same day.” “If you had settled everything that day, then why did she call you again at night?” You hadn’t noticed the tears that rolled down your face until Hongjoong sat next to you, wiping them away gently with his thumb. “She was afraid of the idea of raising a child alone. She had thought she wasn’t strong enough for that yet.” “So she called you to co-parent with her? Ha, I knew it,” you fidgeted with your fingers, looking away to hold back the rest of the tears that threatened to fall. “No—On the contrary, she wanted me to talk her out of giving up on her baby. She’s dating the friend that took her in. He’s a real good father figure already and the baby isn’t born yet. Y/N, please look at me…” it came off not as a demand, but a plea. He held your chin to make you face him. “Me and her are nothing more than friends, I mean it.” “What about when I asked you if you loved her? You told me you loved her…” Your voice now wavering. “Is that why you came with her today?” “I—“ he sighed, “I meant it. I do love her. But I’m not in love with her. I only came with her because I owed her an apology for ending my friendship with her the way I did that night.” A silence overcame you both momentarily, “I’m sorry,” your voice barely audible. “I feel like a fool for not trusting you.” “Don’t apologize. I know I didn’t help by keeping all those secrets when I shouldn’t have. I know now that there shouldn’t be any secrets between us…” he hadn’t used that word in so long, yet it felt right and wrong at the same time. He didn’t know if there was still an “us” to claim. To him, you wouldn’t accept him back, all he could hope for is for you to accept his apology.
You threw yourself at him, hugging him tightly at his words. You so badly wanted him back and the fact that he referred to you both as “us” was the perfect indication that he wanted the same. Or so you assumed. You took his face in your hands, looking into his eyes, searching within them the answer to your assumption. His soft gaze encouraged you to kiss him. He placed his hands on your shoulders stopping you right after you tried to deepen the kiss. “I’m sorry, I can’t,” Hongjoong pushed himself off of you. “Why? Why can’t you?” You looked for an answer in his eyes. “I don’t want to hurt you,” his head hung low. “You can’t hurt me any more than you did 9 months ago. You sat up on the couch. “I want you Hongjoong. No, I need you,” you stood up, slowly undoing the zipper on the dress you were wearing. “Please, not here. Not like this…” he rushed you two to his dorm before your dress could fall to the floor.
His room still being filled with pictures of you two, pictures that held beautiful memories. “You still have them” you held a picture frame of you two, one you had packed in the bag you returned to him. “Of course,” he approached you from behind, wrapping his hands around your waits, leaving a trail of wet kisses down your neck to your now exposed shoulder. This brought tears to your eyes. He really does love you the way you loved and still love him. “You were the best thing that has happened to me.” You leaned your head to the side, giving him more access. Holding the back of his head with your right hand, closing your eyes, taking in the moment. Hongjoong helped you walk towards his bed, never detaching himself from you, not wanting you to slip from his grasp once again. Swiftly turning you around, he guided you to sit on the edge of the bed. Kneeling down before you, wiping away your tears that threatened to fall. “I need you to stop me if this isn’t what you want. Because this is what I want. I want a future with you. I want more than just forever with you. If we take this step, just know I’m not letting you go again. I will fight to the death for you.” You nodded, “this is what I want Joongie.” He quickly attached himself onto you, the kiss being very needy. With a hand to the back of your head, he urged you lie down on his bed. Treating you the entire time as if you were a fragile object. His left hand roaming down your side, reaching your panties, gently assisting you out of them. For each piece of clothing he took off from you, you helped him out of one of his too. Lying fully exposed on his bed, you waited as he grabbed a condom from his drawer. He slid the condom on, fixing himself back on top of you. “It’s not too late to back out love,” the latter word brining you such bliss, you pulled him into another kiss. “I wouldn’t back out for the world.” He nudged at your entrance, entering you painfully slow, allowing you to get used to the sudden stretch. You gasped when he was fully inside you. His movements were slow, causing a small sting on your heat. “Let me know if you feel even the slightest discomfort love.” He moved a bit faster, taking a few moments to kiss you ever so passionately. Never once detaching your hands from him, that is until you saw the sweat forming on his forehead. You helped him into a new position that allowed you to ride him. You planted your hands on his chest as you moved your hips up and down. The new position aiding him to be deeper in you, bringing you to loll your head back with your eyes closed, enjoying the feeling all too much. “My beautiful lady,” he reached out for one of your hands, bringing it closer to his lips, giving it a gentle kiss, “I love you.” At his confession, you slowed down, fluttering your eyes open as you brought yourself to face him again. “I love you Joongie,” you intertwined your fingers with his as you made your way down to kiss him. He let go of your hands only to fully embrace you, deepening the kiss once more. He reached for your hips to help you move against him, brining you both close to your high. You were the first to reach your orgasm, brining you almost to a complete stop. His hands, still on your hips, assisted your movements once again, allowing him to chase after his.
You laid next to him, both your chests heaving. Hongjoong went into the bathroom, coming back with a small wet cloth. He placed it at your heat, letting you warm up to it so he could wipe you clean. After cleaning himself up too, he lied down next to you, taking you into his embrace. You smiled at the man, overjoyed that you were in his arms again. “You should consider yourself lucky. You’re the only one I like to have skin-ship with.” The room was filled with your laughter. Happiness spread across both your faces now that you were back together. “I have something for you,” he left the room for a few seconds. “I made this thinking of you,” he settled down next to you again, giving you the usb in his hands. “Untitled (choose you)” was written on a piece of tape that was attached to it. He had composed a beautiful song describing how he felt for you. It was, if not, the best gift you had ever received. Well, a close second. The universe gifting him back to you was your first best gift.
#ateez#ateez fanfic#ateez imagines#ateez smut#ateez x reader#hongjoong#hongjoong smut#hongjoong fanfic#hongjoong imagines#hongjoong x reader#hongjoong x y/n#kpop smut#kpop imagines#kpop fanfic#kim hongjoong#ateez angst#hongjoong angst#kim hongjoong angst#kpop angst
145 notes
·
View notes
Text
Evan Buckley Week 2024
The prompts for Evan Buckley Week 2024 are here!
This event celebrating our very own Evan "Buck" Buckley from 9-1-1 will be held from the 12th until the 18th of August 2024.
You don't need to sign up to participate, just make sure that when you post your work here on Tumblr, you use the tag #buckweek2024. Since tags can get a bit finicky here on Tumblr, you can choose to let us know you posted by also tagging @evanbuckleyweek in your post. Fics posted to ao3 can be added to the Evan Buckley Week 2024 collection.
We've provided prompts for edits as well as fanfiction and art. However, you don't have to stick to one specific list. We encourage you to choose from whichever one sparks joy, as long as you make sure to post on the corresponding day the prompt belongs to!
Edits
For edits, we have some prompts for you where you can pick your Buck-related favorites to make an edit with. All kinds of edits are welcome! Show us your gifs, image-edits and collages!
Day 1: Buck + favorite rescue
Day 2: Buck + favorite line
Day 3: Buck + favorite near death experience
Day 4: Buck + hugs
Day 5: Buck + bi disaster moments
Day 6: Buck + love language
Day 7: favorite headcanon or free choice
Fic & art
For fics and art we're giving you a few prompts to choose from every day. You can choose only one of these, or choose to combine two or all three of them! Every day consists of a line, a theme and a feeling.
Every part of the prompts is completely open to your interpretation. Surprise us with your creativity! We look forward to your fics and all variations of art and other creative works!
Day 1: “Why did you do that?” | reckless behavior | fear
Day 2: “This is my home” | catharsis | hope
Day 3: “Stop lying” | walking away | anger
Day 4: "I really don't like thunderstorms" | late night conversations | anxiety
Day 5: “I wonder what it would have been like if I had known sooner” | bi pride | acceptance
Day 6: "that's why I love you" | love languages | joy
Day 7: favorite headcanon or free choice
Some last things before you go and create your masterpieces:
Please make sure that your fics on ao3 are tagged with the proper ratings and warnings.
We want to ask you to refrain from submitting any of the following: works with character bashing or ship bashing as well as works containing explicit rape/non-con, pedophilia and incest (exploring the aftermath or trauma of these things is okay). Fics that do contain any of these will not be accepted into the ao3 collection and posts will not be reblogged to the Evan Buckley Week blog.
If you have a question, check our FAQ page to see if the answer is there or drop an ask in our inbox!
#evan buck buckley#evan buckley#buckweek2024#911 on abc#9-1-1#911 abc#911 fox#Evan Buckley Week 2024
118 notes
·
View notes
Text
Fics for Palestine! 🖤❤️🤍💚
Hey, beautiful Tumblr besties!
Do you want a fic and to support a good cause? A super specific fic? Want to ensure you are fed those Monkey Man fics you're needing? Or have you sent me a request and want me to hurry up and write it (Sorry I do take my time with writing)? THEN READ
I will write and prioritise requests from you and have them posted on Tumblr NO LATER THAN MAY 31ST!!!!
All you need to do is send same day confirmation to me either in the ask box or as a message of donating to a fund or organisation on the Operation Olive Branch list! This could be a family's Go Fund Me page for evacuating Palestine, the UNRWA fund, or eSims for Gaza etc.
This is the Operation Olive Branch's linktree page
I don't know what the response will be to this, if miraculously so many people were interested that I was too overwhelmed I would come up with a new date or close temporarily and 'reopen' for June. We'll see how this does, but I will be regularly updating this!
I will write for the following characters:
Any Pedro Pascal characters
Any Oscar Isaac characters
Any Dev Patel characters
Any Fallout characters
Any Succession characters (not Old Guard or Greg lol but even Tom!)
Tommy Miller (TLOU)
Any The Bear characters
Marvel characters like Matt Murdock, Wanda, Bucky etc.
And more I just can't think of, you're more than welcome to ask about a certain character in comments, DMs or in my inbox before donating as well 🫶
What I will write:
I'll write fluff, angst, smut, or any combination! I will write plus size readers, poc readers, disabled readers etc. I will write female readers, and gender-neutral readers, I'm bi/queer so am happy to write wlw fics if you desire Shiv or some Wanda with an f reader or more straight ones- whatever you want! Requests can be as vague or as specific as you want!
If you want Kendall and Stewy's conversation the night before his wedding to Rava with some angst, you got it! If you wanted to request a plus-size reader to go on a bookstore date with a contemporary Ezra, you got it! It's pretty open to your dreams!
I won't write fics that are nonconsensual, 'dark', heavy kink, gore, vore, paedophilia, and nothing with under-18 readers or characters (this includes characters 'aged up' for a fic).
My masterlist is here for navigation and if you aren't familiar with my work but want to get an idea!!! Chaithetics Masterlist
Moving on.....
If you donate 5 USD, CAD, GBP, EURO whatever currency that fund is in:
I will write a fic with your request that is at least 500 words long and is posted no later than May 31st.
If you donate 10 USD, CAD, GBP, EURO whatever currency that fund is in:
I will write a fic with your request that is at least 1,000 words long and is posted no later than May 31st.
If you donate 50 USD, CAD, GBP, EURO whichever currency that fund is in:
I will write a fic with your request that is at least 4,000 words long and is posted no later than May 31st.
Why is this important?
We need to help out and do our part to not be complicit in Israel's genocide against the Palestinian people. Palestinians are begging for our attention and aid, since October 7th 2023, Israel has murdered over 35,000 Palestinians, displacing the survivors so many and committing numerous war crimes. Israel's expulsion, ethnic cleansing and war crimes have been terrorising the Palestinian people and land since 1948.
We all have a part to play, so get involved with this if you like, please contact your local representatives and government, keep engaging with Palestinian content and voices, support the funds if you can- I know that's not accessible to everyone, attend rallies, protests, and vigils in support of Palestine. Do what you can, what is physically, emotionally and financially accessible to you.
I'd love it if you could share this as well, especially for my mutuals and others in these fandoms with much bigger platforms (I have a humble 300 followers, that I adore) and also for other writers to consider doing something like this!
Thank you for reading this far, let's stay empathetic and support each other in these trying times 🖤❤️🤍💚
#fics for palestine#free palestine#operation olive branch#pedro pascal fandom#pedro pascal fanfiction#pedro pascal characters#oscar isaac fandom#oscar isaac fanfiction#stewy hosseini x reader#succession fanfiction#matt murdock x reader#fallout fanfic#norm maclean x reader#lucy maclean x reader#cooper howard x reader#dev patel#dev patel fanfiction#the bear fanfiction#marvel fanfiction#ghoul x reader#palestine fundraiser#open for requests#monkey man x reader
77 notes
·
View notes
Text
day 32
if you like my (cybrthrillz) content, please read this
tw for self harm and suicidal ideation
i want to take a break
this is not a victory or a win for anyone. if anything all of the harassment and relentless targeted hate has only made me even more motivated to make this little space ive created a more accepting place, and i will continue to be a voice of support for "weird and contradictory" queer identities because we all deserve to be happy and accepted
but, for a long time ive been putting myself in harms way, generally neglecting my own needs for the sake of other people, because i dont care about what happens to me as long as other people are happy and safe, and right now i dont think i can keep pushing myself like that anymore. im tired
i havent had a s/h problem since middle school but now those urges are resurfacing again when i thought id never have to deal with that again
i havent been able to relax or enjoy any of my time without having dreadful thoughts in the back of my mind
ill probably be changing things going forward too, or maybe things wont be changing at all. i dont know. i just know that i want to try and relax and watch those movies ive been meaning to watch and play more video games without feeling guilty that im not using my time for drawing.
the controversies have wounded me a lot but unfortunately regretevator is still my main hyperfixation so ill have trouble getting myself to draw anything else and i dont think i want to really avoid it. so ill still be drawing, but ill be drawing for myself without really worrying about posting schedules. ill still be active on discord, tumblr, instagram
im not going to kill myself today, nor am i going to in the future. because whether some people want to believe it or not, i know and my friends know that i always try my best to be a considerate and kind, overall good person. i know that i genuinely have positively impacted many people in life. i hope that ill be able to go back to regularly posting soon with a clearer state of mind because your support has genuinely improved my life both emotionally and financially, and i couldnt be more grateful.
but right now, its okay to be a little selfish for my sake. and i hope that you all can understand and be patient with me. thanks for stickin around
#daily wallter#regretevator art#regretevator fanart#regretevator wallter#wallter regretevator#regretevator roblox#roblox regretevator#regretevator roblox game#roblox#roblox art#roblox fanart#roblox game#roblox games
92 notes
·
View notes
Note
i open up my tumblr to get my daily dose of turtle content after an excruciating day and immediately SPAT out my tea seeing what was happening in the rottmnt tumblr community like?? oh my god thats WILD
i presume you're referring to the dragon situation which is. well. it sure is fucking something i'll tell you that.
it's my understanding that she's currently being told she didn't do anything wrong which. ok. i'm going to need people to understand something. there are two big reasons to Why this is Such a Huge Fucking Deal.
interacting, sexually, with adults (which dragon lied about her age to do) is harmful for kids. it puts them directly into explicitly sexual places, which while Mostly Safe, do harbor some people who will latch onto vulnerable people. kids don't have a lot of the real-world experience that adults have that allow them to Spot these asshats and avoid them. kids like validation. they like feeling cool, wanted. and groomers know how to spot people that like these things and give it to them. christ, there are a lot of Adults that get this part wrong. (comprehensive sex education can reduce the chances of this happening, but considering the state of that for children being less than robust, it's safe to assume Most kids aren't being taught the sighs of a proper, actual predator and not 'dude in a white van with some candy.')
interacting, sexually, with kids, can get adults into a MASSIVE amount of trouble. there is no recourse for this. it ruins your reputation, it puts you on a fucking List, it can get you jail time, it destroys your ability to get housing or a job, etc.
so yes. this was all bad because a kid was doing sex stuff. but for everyone who i've seen saying "ohhh we all looked at smut and stuff when we were teenagers, she didn't do anything wrong", yes, she did. because she INTERACTED WITH ADULTS ABOUT IT. yes, we all know that teenagers read smut. we all know that you can click onto someone's blog. frankly, in my opinion, there's never going to be a way to stop that. but having that teenager come into adult spaces and TALK to adults, SEND them asks, POST erotic art, SEND THAT LEWD ART TO ADULTS, DO EROTIC ROLEPLAY WITH OTHER ADULTS, is beyond the pale. that's not "a teenager reading smut like we all did." that's a minor violating the trust and consent of adults who have said they don't want to interact with minors.
i want you to imagine a scenario where we have someone we Know is a liar. she says she's 17 in two months. but is she? she's lied about it before. but let's say we believe her this time. let's say we trust her when she says she's 18 now. we start letting her interact again. we talk about erotica with her again. except oops she's still not 18, she's 16 and her mommy just checked on her blog and sees she's talking about porn with adults. or she hears a headcanon she doesn't like and decides to narc on that adult for sexting with a child. or one of her friends decides they don't like how i talk to people, so they say something.
do you see the problem? sure, the kid is in danger. but so is the adult. the adult who thought they were interacting with another adult, but because that kid lied, now they're the one in trouble. oh, and fun fact, there is typically no recourse against the kid in this scenario. the adult's life is ruined, and the kid gets to walk away.
there are very few adult-only spaces left on the internet. we put up signs on our blogs that say "we talk about sex. minors do not interact." because we want these spaces for ourselves. it's so disrespectful and childish and stupid and selfish and bratty for kids to think "oh, i'm adult enough for that, actually" or "well everyone i'm following is an adult, but they all say minors don't interact, so i'll just lie and say i'm an adult, heehee." it reveals a lack of character and regard for others that disgusts me. it tells me that you don't care about my wishes, you will do whatever you want to get what you want. i did not consent to speak with a child. it's vile behavior, and people who can't comprehend why the adults here are so upset because "oh you don't owe anyone your age, we all read smut as kids, what's the big deal, it's totally fine" are clearly not using any amount of critical thinking because they learned that their favorite artist is a minor and they don't want to rock the boat and lose access to it which, by the way, maybe think about what that says about you.
#ask tag#inhale. exhale. okay i got that off my shoulders. feels better.#.......imagine this wasn't the drama you were talking about and i'm missing something else LMAOOOOO#well THIS is the drama in MY world right now so THIS is what you get the rant on!!!!#but yeah. dragons is 100% blacklisted. i don't tolerate people who lie about important shit like that.
57 notes
·
View notes
Text
The Witchstorian Is Down For The Count
Okay so full disclosure, y'all - I may have caught the Rona again. It's hard to tell because it's been a few days so the test was inconclusive and my symptoms are outside the normal lot. (Although I've been told that the main indicators of the new Omicron strain match what I'm dealing with - continuous migraine, crushing fatigue, vertigo, body aches.)
I'm currently taking a little time off of work so I can heal and not spread this around, but the bills are stacking up, the cats need to be fed, and we don't get paid again until the end of the month.
So if anybody wants something from the shop, now would be an EXCELLENT time to place an order! (I'll wait until my symptoms fade to pack things, just for safety. Hopefully it'll just be a few more days.) And if you let me know here on tumblr that you made a purchase, I'll slip a little something extra in with your goodies!
Hope you're all keeping well and staying safe! Remember to wash your hands, get your boosters if you can, and keep practicing safe hex!
#bree in real life#witch community#witchblr#witch shop#Willow Wings Witch Shop#sick day posting#witchy things
53 notes
·
View notes
Text
[Simmerianne93]Phone_poses_09
HELLO EVERYONE!!! How are today???
How many phone poses are too many phone poses???.... Yeah, another phone posepack is here, and I think the answer is: "never is enough".
This pack of poses is kind of a continuation of the last one i released (Phone_poses_08).... Again some poses with an "angry" mood... tho in this opportunity i guess the sim is more "serious" and kind of "worry" than angry.... at least he is not screaming, you know haha. Some of them are also a mood variation of some poses I made for the pack "Phone_poses_06" (poses #1, #2, #3 and #4 if I'm not wrong), but there are some new ones too.
I really like making phone poses. I think they're really useful, since it's an object that we use a lot on a daily basis, and I'm very happy with the packages I've posted so far because I've covered some joy, worry, sadness and anger, so I hope you like them and that you never get bored of them. I have some other phone poses in mind but with the sim sitting and even lying down in bed or sofas, and even in the floor... I dunno... I think i can make some more of them anywhere haha but we'll see....
Anyway, I hope you like and enjoy this pack. As usual I'm using Moc's Iphone11 accessory (I have to thank the creator 'cause i love that phone. Has the perfect size haha, and I encourage you to look at their phone poses too, 'cause they can be useful as well: here, here and here you have some of them) but you can also use Redhead's Iphone 11 and it may not glitch that much (It's a slightly bigger but works good and it's good to use with character with heterochromia, since the acc from moc glitch the texture with some heterochromia eyes).
Here you have the description of the pack:
----------
What is on it?
12 solo poses for a sim + 1 all in one.
---
What do you need?
Andrew's poses player
Teleport any sim by Scumbumbo or Mccc by deaderpool.
acc_iphone11_R_necklace(byMoc)
Instructions in the original post.
——
TOU
Do not claim my creations as your own.
Do not re-upload or modify my creations.
Do not make money of my creations.
Do not include my creations in Mods folders to download.
Please follow my Term Of Use.
——
Download it now here — [Early access until June 4th, 2024]
——————
If you want to support me: Patreon | Ko-fi
All my poses overview: Pinterest | Wix | Tumblr
More in-game preview pics of all my poses: Instagram
My socials: Twitter | BlueSky | Instagram | Tumblr
Lives and videos: Youtube
——————
I really hope you like them and I will say in advance: Thank you so much for using them.
@ts4-poses
29 notes
·
View notes
Text
SCALES OF JUSTICE - BETA TESTERS NEEDED
Hi dear readers,
Thank you for your overwhelming trust and support. The opinions that I've collected over the past few days have finally motivated me to put aside my self-criticism and doubt, and to make the next step towards SoJ's release.
Yes, Scales of Justice is now officially in its BETA-test phase!!
If you would like to help me by being a BETA-tester for my book, please, comment under this post, send me a direct message, or message me on CoG's forum. I aim to take around 20 to 30 people, so we can have a big and productive group that nonetheless remains constructive in its feedback.
If you don't have the time or you don't want to be a tester, consider sharing this post, so it can get to as many of you as possible.
I will be working alongside the testers on improving style, grammar, and other minor details that require polishing as the month progresses. Hopefully, by the end of it we'll have an even better version of this book that will be submitted for approval to Hosted Games!
See you all very soon,
Julia xx
BOOK DETAILS:
DEMO DESCRIPTION:
Scales of Justice is a fantasy game situated in another world, far away from Earth. There are plenty of species living together in harmony, but the human race is currently split in two civilisations: the one known as Hero kingdom, which is ruled by ‘heroes’, and the one named Vannais kingdom, controled by ‘villains’. Both nations hate each other and the fight between ‘heroes’ and ‘villains’ here is something that happens on a national level. The game is focused on lore, on character development and your own perception of reality: perhaps, your MC just wants to live a peaceful life... or maybe wants to save the world.
Or even rule it, if you’re into such things.
THINGS TO DO IN THIS DEMO:
Set off on a new adventure towards Neutral Lands, to meet a mythic creature of all answers - The Visionary.
Gather up to 3 companions to help you in your quest - befriend, romance or rival them, the choice is yours.
Buy a horse - we know you want one.
Fight, conjure, support, speak or think - choose your way of handling a tricky situation.
Explore the kingdom of Hero up to Menai's shore, in search for someone - or something - to aid you in your journey.
The DEMO version of the book runs up to Chapter 5 and contains 276K words overall. I will be putting up updated versions of the first chapters as I work my way through them, so expect the DEMO version to become a polished reflection of what the final book will look like!
USEFUL LINKS:
If you want to know a little more about this project and read chapters 1-5, I'll leave the link to the game here -> https://dashingdon.com/play/myimaginedcorner/scales-of-justice/mygame/
If you want to discuss anything on CoG's forum, I'll leave the link for SoJ here -> https://forum.choiceofgames.com/t/wip-scales-of-justice-new-project-announcement-and-demo-release/101088/16
If you want to send me a more extensive feedback, here's my email -> [email protected]
Any mistakes, concerns or questions you have, feel free to contact me through Tumblr! I am very excited to share this story with all of you, and I want to make it as good as possible with your help!
RO DESCRIPTIONS:
Shoren/Seile -> Heir to the Hero kingdom's throne, right where your journey starts. Also, your old friend who's very attached to you. Likes to read and practices magic, enjoys adventure and heroic deeds. A recognised “hero”, with blonde curly hair, pale skin and a pair of beautiful blue eyes.
Robert/Reina -> Order's Paladin, defender of Hero and Knight of Fate. Brave and honourable, determined to protect the people of the kingdom. Very loyal to friends and very dangerous as an enemy. Has short brown hair, tanned skin and an athletic build.
Valerius/Venis -> An Outworlder, who was caught by cultists from the Wicked Woods. Gracious, elegant and charismatic. Has long dark brown hair with a silver streak, olive skin and golden eyes.
Arion/Aria -> Leader of Vannais, a recognised “villain” who escaped from Hero and now rules the enemy kingdom. Serious, reserved but temperamental. Prefers action over words and so is always present on battlefields and amidst negotiations, even though never in official manner. Has short blonde hair, pale skin and emerald eyes.
Be careful! These characters have their thoughts and opinions on the world and your actions: if you want them to support you, convince them or take their side… or neither. That is your choice after all!
#scales of justice#interactive story#tumblr community#interactive if#interactive game#hosted games#beta tester#progress update#update
29 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hello, Can you please elaborate on the 'Canon-Manga' version of the black butler Sebaxciel ship? because in the manga, everything so very different....according to manga, I don't think sebaxciel ship is that strong ...or sometimes it feels only very 'Platonic' and not so 'sexy' as it is always being potrayed in anime.... can you please write a tumblr blog post about only the manga ship part and how strong their ship is and how it is currently going ? Because compared to anime, manga version seems weaker .... and I honestly want sebaxciel ship to be as canon as possible ...that's why I do not like talking about Season 2 because it entirely filler fanfic not canon at all...I want this ship strong cannonically
Hi! I haven't read the manga, I just know some of the major spoilers plus I've seen some of the most popular panels and moments.
Just from what I've observed, in addition to the official art, I'd say that Sebaciel is semi-canon both in manga and in the anime. But that depends on your interpretation of the word "canon". Ciel and Sebastian need each other like they need no one else; they understand each other like no one else has a chance to; they share a tense, often-sensual, all-consuming bond that makes them allies and adversaries at the same time. There are endless moments in the manga and official art that portray the sensuality, dark tension, flirtation, and possessiveness between them. Their bond is central to the plot, so to me, this definitely makes them a half-canon ship.
If you're interested, here's a post with some analysis of Ciel and Sebastian's relationship in manga.
As for S2, I actually love it! I call it a love letter from Sebastian to Ciel, and the ending presents the best and the most challenging scenario I could have envisioned. In relation to manga, S1 is barely canon as well, so to me, there is anime canon and manga canon. Series like BoC, BoM, and BoM can be applied to both.
29 notes
·
View notes
Text
you people are so fucking stupid
perhaps the reading comprehension on this site is piss poor because the only thing you people can comprehend is incomprehensible to anyone who goes outside ever
Is "all rap is sexist/violent/whatever" a stupid take? YES but some of it is and some people have only listened to like... 2 artist before
AND there have been other rappers who have talked about the sexism in the industry HELL in the shit that started this entire bullshit one of kendrick's bar's literally mentions "theres weird shit in this industry" motherfuckers were tryna get tory lanez off for shooting megan the stallion, chris brown is STILL allowed to do whatever, and believe it or not, it's pretty easy to find on my acc that I am in fact a woman, and yk other motherfucker, down with the ship down with crew, it wasn't even that long ago it was a bigass topic that female rappers were talkin about men the same way male rappers talked about women, but i guess yall aren't ready for that conversation since it's easier for man to try to switch the topic away from exploitation and double standards against women
and like i FUCKING SAID, i like rap, theres a lot of rap artists that make music that isn't violent, is chill, is introspective, gets into your feelings n shit, I also really only listen to female rap artists sue me
But I want yall to go back and actually fuckin dust off that 8th grade reading level, and read the original fucking post i reblogged, doesn't matter what the intention was it was 100% fucking phrased like rap is the only music POC make, or the only music by POC people know is rap, it's fucking not, because it had no fucking mention of what people have been saying which I by the way haven't fucking heard anyone say and i've heard a TON of people talking about the kendrick drake beef, because i talk to people that exist off tumblr.com
and once again the way the phrased it only works if there wasn't people of color on the top 100 chart, and stop being fucking weird about mixed people, mixed people are still fully allowed to identify with their heritage
and some of yall, are just fucking weird, yes I did name artists that aren't mixed, i just happened to also name artists that are mixed? what happened to not erasing mixed people's cultural identity? you do realized the person i fucking responded to to begin with is not only mixed, but it's also not with black at all, tumblr really has this issue where they feel like they can only defend one community by diminishing another and it's fucking gross, as for me mentioning growing up in a mixed community, that was, as i stated multiple fucking times if you people weren't morons, only in relation to me having seen first fuckin hand different kinds of POC can be racist to eachother, as in, once again, the motherfucker wasn't black, sure they were POC, but not black, so they're on equal standing with me in this SPECIFIC conversation since i need to spell it out for yall, since yall seem to forget different POC experience different things and people of color aren't a fucking monolith that all experience the exact same things
in conclusion, you can all kill yourselves now <3 and you've all become the very thing you hate, some of yall are sexist, some of all are gross towards mixed people, and some of yall are just straight up racist by generalizing
xoxo, i regret nothing, and it's completely worth it to get your GED <3
26 notes
·
View notes
Text
For the lovely @nuncscioquidsitamor-14 <3 The first interaction we had lolol. I am so greatful to have had you interact with me. I have made so many wonderful mutuals and have had so much fun being back on Tumblr over the past few months. I will be honest, I don’t think I would stuck around (as I have ghosted my account two times prior-). So I mean it when I say thank you for being the reason I stayed.
Also, sorry for what i’m about to do to Leo.
|| Mother Hen the Mother Hen
Pairing(s) ->
2012!Leonardo H. x F!Reader
Warning(s) ->
Violence, Injuries, Blood,
Summary ->
Leo goes to reader after being injured on a solo mission.
1067 Words : Masterlist
He jumped back, hand clutching himself with heavy breaths. Staring down the remaining foot. Taking his katana and charging. Forming a roundhouse kick, the tip of his katana being used as support, as he pushed off of one foot soldier to slam another. The hilt of his katana backing into another’s stomach before jumping away. Landing perfectly.
Leonardo has come alone. No one, not even Master Splinter knew of this outing. Just him. He took off again, with only a few stragglers remaining of this bust. Whatever they wanted, they were not going to get it.
Next thing he knew, Leo found himself being slammed against a wall.
His shell and body ached, he was exhausted, and most importantly did not want to face the scolding of his master, or brothers. So, Leo went to the one place he’d avoid all of that. The home of a special ‘friend’ of his. He knew the route by heart. A past solo patrol where he stopped a mugging led to one, two, three, more meetings after that night.
It was not far, but his injuries significantly slowed him down. He was more out of breath by the time he arrived. Landing with a stumble on your fire escape. Slumping against the side railing. He managed to make one tiny knock before he grew still, in hopes of not hurting his injuries further.
𓂃 ࣪˖
The second she heard the knock she turned to look, the knock was familiar. The sigh Leo used to let her know he was there. She found it a little strange he came without a heads up, but it wasn’t unwanted. But when [name] looked out the window. The smile she had faltered and her face shifted to one of worry and concern.
The teenage girl—without hesitation—swiftly got out the window and dragged the exhausted turtle, katanas and all inside.
“Leonardo Hamato! What the hell happened to you? Where are your brothers? Do they know? Does Master Splinter know?” This was exactly what Lep had hoped to avoid. But it seems he can’t.
“Shit- just wait here!” Her voice wavered and she was practically sprinting to find something. In the next few seconds he knew what: a first-aid kit, after he removed his hand from himself.
Blood—red shiny blood—it clung to his hand and the adrenaline just began to wear off right then.
“Oh..” His own voice wavered.
She can right back at that moment getting to work to stop the bleeding while rambling on to him about this. Like a mother hen- like himself.
“Seriously, Lee, do your brothers or father know you're out? At all?” Right- two things his brothers and father didn’t know. That he was out of a solo patrol, and that he had a girlfriend.
“No, they don’t know I'm out—or that you exist..”
“Leonardo.”
The blue clad turtle diverted away his eyes. He could tell she was more mad about the ‘his brothers and father didn’t know he was out’ thing.
“You need to be more careful! This wound is pretty deep, Leo. I’m just glad you didn’t pass out on the way here.”
“I’m sorry, love.”
As soon as the wound was wrapped and cleaned she stood up.
“Let me check your shell.”
“Huh-“
“You tensed when I was near it, let me see, c’mon.”
Leo turned with your help, letting you assess his shell. She could see him tensing in certain areas when she glided over them. There were no cracks, or holes, yet. So for now she took some diluted betadine and applied it to the area, then gently covered it to keep it from getting infected.
“There, it’s just bruised and nothing serious. But, as you get home you make sure they check it out and watch for cracks or holes, okay?”
Leo nodded. His eyes had been locked onto the movie playing, it was a good distraction. [Name] joined him back on the couch, and Leo slowly and gingerly leaned against her, burying himself into her side.
The two remained quiet during the movie, well except for the occasional adjustment, between the two. The little popcorn that had originally been made for [Name] was quickly gone.
“I’m gonna go make some more, I'll be right back.” She pecked the top of his head. Leo hummed a response, invested in the movie. He was content on the couch, even getting a little sleepy. Well if it wasn’t for the ache in his legs begging to move. He waited a while longer, until he couldn’t. The turtle mutant pulled himself up holding onto whatever he could as he guided himself to the kitchen.
“Leo-? You should be on the couch resting.” [Name] turned from the popcorn to look at Leo.
“I needed to stretch. So my legs aren’t sore tomorrow morning.” She took the answer with a nod, returning to the popcorn which was almost finished popping.
Leo stands beside her, slowly lacing their hands together, figuring with her fingers.
“Thank you for fixing me up.” She smiled.
“I would do it again, a thousand times over.” She added with her smile now directed at him.
“And I would ‘mother hen’ you even if you had gone home first.” Leo smiled, twirling her around slowly. Getting a laugh from her.
“Like I do?” He guessed.
“Very much like you do.” He would do it a million times over if it meant being with her too.
A beep came from the microwave, alerting them the popcorn had finished. Leo helped her bring the warm popcorn bowl back to the couch. Getting readjusted and comfortable on the couch.
The movie was almost over by the time they returned, it had been half way through upon his arrival at least. They both were—mostly—quiet during the rest of the movie. Little comments being made here and there. Popcorn grabbed and eaten. Soon the second bowl was discarded from their laps.
[Name] made sure Leo was comfortable leaning against her, that it wasn’t awkward on his shell, and that he wasn’t awkwardly positioned. He reassured her and she nodded with relief.
The movie ended around the time Leo fell asleep. [Name] turning the TV off and grabbing the blanket behind her wrapping it around the two. Falling asleep shortly after. A little smile on her face,and relief that Leo was okay tonight. Tomorrow? That would be a whole other story.
#acerrr writings#tmnt#tmnt 2012#tmnt 2k12#tmnt leonardo#tmnt leo#tmnt leonardo x reader#tmnt leo x reader#tmnt 2012 x reader#tmnt 2012 leonardo#tmnt 2012 leo#tmnt 2012 leonardo x reader#tmnt 2012 leo x reader#tmnt 2k12 x reader#tmnt 2k12 leo#tmnt 2k12 leonardo x reader#tmnt 2k12 leo x reader
46 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
itsmepluviophile
pluviophile
refrctlght-moved
* ENCANTADO
awkwardthespiangiraffe
If music be the food of love, play on
thatcipherdraws
Elijah
pungent-things
Musings About The Universe, And Video Games