🦋~I want you to kiss me, I want you to remake me I want to drown in this moment of captivation~🦋

(I fucking did it dear god that was so many fucking layers)

fuck all the brainsoup has completely shot my mood gotta figure out an endorphin hit quick so i can get back to fucking cleaning which is what I was SUPPOSED to be doing before getting sucked into the social media vortex

I’ll admit I didn’t pay much attention to your OCs at first but now I’m very interested. Can you give a quick summary of them please?

i'm giggling at this ask bc i went back in my tags to try to figure out what had intrigued you and truly i've just been kin assigning shitposts to the OCs.

i think i wrote a rundown of them a while ago but can't be assed to find it so here's an even shorter one

all four members of the quartet live in tachni, a fictional city-state with a stranglehold over this fictional world's global economy. tachni's culture is largely based around light magic, which is an abstract type of magic related to illusions and luck and the future and abstraction.

everyone uses she/her, devin also uses they/them and he/him.

so:

nova - gaslight

nova is the incarnation of a light god, she has an unbelievable amount of political control/influence over tachni & she can turn her reality into a dreamland playground at will. this has left her craving things that are Real, which is unfortunate because her real soulmate hates her guts. her magic is making her very sick but she's pretending that it isn't bc she can solve everything with yoga and health smoothies.

devin - gatekeep

devin is the incarnation of an earth god, divine powers work thru her in the same way as nova, except that her magic is rooted in the concrete rather than the abstract. which means she can build shit and tear it down just as easily. being the opposite of nova's god, she's technically nova's soulmate & the two of them are supposed to balance each other out. however devin is much sicker than nova because of how fucked-up tachni is, and she's a giant bitch about it at all times.

sol - girlboss

sol is the devil. if not literally then certainly in every other regard. she too has an enormous amount of political power and sway, because she is unbelievably rich and has a monopoly on tachni's sex work industry. she's a nightmare of a human being who loves murder and terrorism; it's an open secret that she has killed a lot of people and that nobody will ever be able to prove it. girlboss antics. sol's bitchy attitude is in many ways the antithesis of nova; devin is wantonly cheating on nova with her, inasmuch as you can cheat on someone that you never wanted to marry in the first place.

ruby - manipulate

ruby is a mental health worker by day and a forger by night, her social power is much quieter. she's doing her best to retain her identity and morals while being surrounded by godawful people. her main focus is on helping marginalized and disenfranchised people get help and achieve their goals. she is unbelievably sad all the fucking time and has a million things wrong with her, which is why she's still hanging out with a bunch of shitty people and enabling their nonsense. she sweeps every OC poll i ever make because of her hashtag relatable neuroses.

all four have very messy history tangled up in each other, some of it gets Very Very Very Ugly and some of it is very funny. shitheads.

no one is a mansplainer or a malewife because i got tired of writing dude POVs. you can make up a couple mansplainer and malewife OCs to annoy the quad if you would like though.

Why You Should Reblog Creative Work

Here’s the thing about tumblr and reblogs: A lot of tumblr olds will tell you how reblogging is the only way for a post—especially when it comes to creative work such as art, gifs, fics etc.—to be seen by other people in the first place, as tumblr doesn’t have an algorithm.

This is not quite true anymore. Tumblr does have an algorithm and it’s a pretty well working one, too. I actually do use the ‘For You’ page every now and then and it always shows me a few posts that absolutely are of my interest. Hell, it even shows me untagged posts, it even shows added commentary in reblogs that are relevant to my interest.

So, saying “a like does nothing on tumblr” isn’t true anymore. As I’ve already seen, you don’t even necessarily need to tag your posts anymore (text posts at least—I don’t believe it’d work with images) to reach your audience.

But, and there is a But, capital letters and all that jazz, tumblr is first and foremost a blogging website. You all have blogs, and when you post here you blog. The reblogging function is a deeply ingrained, essential feature of this site, and when bloggers stop using it, creators will stop creating. A lot of them have already stopped—it’s one of the reasons why I for example, as well as a lot of other writers I know, don’t post fics on here anymore and merely share a quick link to AO3.

This is a blogging website and people are killing it by not using it the way it’s supposed to be used. Yes, you can, technically still reach your audience even if you’re not being reblogged at all, but apart from the fact that a lot of tumblr olds don’t even look at the ‘For You’ page, nothing will spread creative work as fast as reblog chains will. Nothing will make sure your work will be seen at all, except when people reblog it.

Not to mention that the ‘For You’ page (or the ‘Based on Your Likes’ function which is mostly garbage unlike the ‘For You’ page tbh) will never be able to show you older work that could interest you too, and bring the creator joy by getting attention on something that’s already years old again. Only sharing the work and spreading the joy will work.

Also, because likes were pretty useless until recently, most tumblr users don’t see likes as in “hey, I liked this!” but more in a “I saw this” manner. Hell, that’s how I use the like button. Sure, I leave a like on things I do like (I wouldn’t leave it on a post I dislike, that makes no sense), but the like is mostly meant for me to remember I saw this already. To show appreciation I reblog/queue the post. Because that’s what reblogging to most of us means. It means “hey, I like this and I appreciate it and I want to share it so others see this amazing thing too!”

If you leave only a like and no reblog follows it eventually, to most of us it means “yeah, I liked this but not enough to have it on my own blog and share it with others”—and that’s discouraging as fuck. It’s like saying that the work we created isn’t good enough.

Obviously, you don’t have to reblog every art/gifs/fics/etc. you see if they don’t even interest you. But naturally, you wouldn’t leave a like on something you don’t like either, would you?

There’s, of course, also always this small portion of Big Artists who claim that reblogs aren’t that important and likes are just as appreciated, but those are usually the kind of artists who reach hundreds of reblogs, get lot of commentary on the work, kind asks and so on and so forth. Maybe once people stop interacting with their work they would change their tune, but as long as they don’t struggle with receiving appreciation for the creative work that took them hours and was created with passion and love, their opinion doesn’t really matter, as they’re in a huge minority with that view anyway.

(I am talking about creative work specifically here because honestly, no one gives a fuck if you reblog shitposts or not, as they don’t take even remotely the same amount of time as a single art piece does for example, and aren’t made with the same passion either. Ironically though, shitposts are the kind of posts that get the most reblogs anyway.)

At the end of the day, it’s really not that hard to reblog other people’s work. You don’t have to leave a comment in the tags/reblog either, as not everyone has the time and spoons to do so—I do promise you though that if you leave kind commentary underneath a creative work, you will make OP’s day—there’s even a quick reblog resp. a quick queue option on mobile and desktop, which takes you just as long to click as the like button. Literally just a second.

You can also always make (a) sideblog(s) for anything you don’t want to mix with the other things you post/reblog.

And it doesn’t matter if you have no followers or not many who would see the things you reblog either. OP doesn’t know that—all they do know is that someone appreciates the creative work they posted. And a reblog even with no commentary will always be more meaningful than a like.

Maybe it’s not important anymore on tumblr to get reblogs to reach an audience, but the reblogs are still necessary to keep the community alive. And by discarding the reblog function we’re effectively killing that community until there won’t be any creative work anymore and well… probably only memes and shitposts on here.

So instead of getting all prissily and calling creators “entitled” for asking for reblogs, as if it is such a hardship to click the button, you should maybe ask yourself why you’re so reluctant to reblog work that took hours to create in the first place, hm?

Tell us about your blorbos!

oh god oh fuck! well first if you wanna see em, i have a lot of art of them over on @realjem-art and ive been (very slowly) setting up a toyhouse for them (i think ive only added maybe ~half my characters there so far whoopsies)

im gonna put the rest of this under a readmore cause i have no idea how long i'm gonna make this

so i have like... a lot of characters now. i've been building up a bunch of characters and a sliiight story (for some of them at least) since about early 2021, where i made my first actual characters: Ann, Trixie, Scarlett, and Cinnamon

yes i know i've got very generic names for my characters, i don't have the brains for cool names like some people do dgshgdgas

i think my character count is at 56 of them, not including any versions of my sona, because i don't consider that a character, but more of a vessel on what i feel or would want to look like in real life (or just a silly design sometimes)

It sort of shifts around from time to time which characters sort of lodge in my brain the most at a time, for example, at the very beginning, i was definitely showing favoritism towards trixie, and then after i redesigned scarlett a bit, she's been my favorite for a while. there's random bursts where a few of them front for a while, but it typically defaults to scarlett and lumie

lately, i've been drawing a lot of the group i call Halloween Bargain Bin, because they're silly and i really want to flesh them out and their group dynamic a lot more. i've recently plopped a new character into their group (by recently i mean just a few days ago (as of posting this) actually!

as the case is for most of the guys in hbb, a lot of my earlier characters (basically a lot of them made bewteen 2021-2022) were based off of/referenced songs i like. but, because i do want them to feel like more of my own creation, i have been starting to drift a lot of them from their source inspiration, with a few pretty much entirely being divorced from their original inspiration (such as Ann, who was originally a character for Amnesia Was Her Name, which i then couldn't write a story for her well, and now she's just the owner of a lab chock full of creatures, which i just like a lot more)

my characters kinda sort into groups, some small and some way larger, and im just gonna list off all the ones i can think of right now: Ann's Lab, Halloween Bargain Bin, the group of four people that i still don't have a name for (Lilac, Kasey, Fia, Tay), the poly catgirls (Ari, Stella, Savannah), and all the creatures currently within Ann's lab, which is a long list and im not naming them all here (ex: zed, goliath, etc)

because a good chunk of my time is being taken up by school, a lot of my drawings of them right now just look like this:

(^ lumie) since i can access a digital whiteboard on my school computer, where i just draw on that throughout the week, send the link to myself, and then screenshot everything over the weekend

but i do still save time occasionally for actual drawings, such as this one that i still really like

(^ ezekiel, one of my newest characters!) Lately, a lot of the actual drawings have been in this painterly style (procreate, gouache brush)

a lot of character development lately is just me drawing shitposts, small comics that are mostly just jokes but help me try and flesh out their personality a bit

(^ scarlett & lumie, stan and mason) Just quick doodles of stuff i thought was funny and wanted to make real

I do suppose this ask was about my actually talking about my characters, as, well, characters, but i am still bad at that. i will attempt? to talk about a few now?

^ Lumie!! she was made around the start of july 2021 (my first artfight run!) she's my main non-human character pretty much, since her actual story has her in the same role as the humans in AL, as opposed to the monsters. Character design-wise, the most important details are that: she has no eyes, it's just smooth skin where eyes would be on a human, she's larger than an average human (Scarlett is 6'1" where Lumie is 7'4", not much much taller but still), and she glows. she's fuckin bio luminescent! light blue glowing "freckles" break out across her whole body, and her dark hair has the same light blue glow from the bottom up! it's sort of emotionally controlled, so if she were real upset, she'd barely be glowing, and if she were real happy, she'd be bight as hell. As for story, hers is intertwined with Scarlett. essentially they met when they were 9, were best friends, scarlett had to move and you cant just take your bestie/other-dimensional girl you found in a cave along with you if you havent even told anyone about her, and then scarlett finally drove all the way back to hopefully meet her again. now they are girlfriends and work in AL, where scarlett works on "conspiracies" in the meantime

Trixie is another AL member, being the first to find the lab and start working for Ann. Trixie was supposed to just be a janitor or something, but being 17 and stupid, wandered into places where she wasn't supposed to go, and basically got mauled to death by one of the monsters. Ann finds her body a couple hours later and freaks out, but thankfully, being in a lab full of monsters and machines, there is some sort of experimental revival doohicky or whatever, and Trixie is brought back. Her body isn't all physically there sometimes, and it's changed in small, unnatural ways, but besides that she's mostly fine. Not including the fact that she's practically a zombie and she's stuck as a 17 year old. She can't really go anywhere else now, and she claims her life sucked ass before the lab, so she just stays and researches the monsters with Ann now.

These three (Scarlett, Lumie, Trixie) are the ones with the most semblance of a story so far, so it's easier to talk about them, lol

OKay, this is getting really, really long, and its probably already a pain to read (if anyone did read through all of this, which in that case thank you?) so im gonna leave this for now, but you are always welcome to ask about specific characters, or my favorite, you can ask me to talk about my characters in the sense of how they've changed over the past couple of years (in art, story, design, etc)

I posted 4,683 times in 2022

That's 4,240 more posts than 2021!

2,569 posts created (55%)

2,114 posts reblogged (45%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@chuuyas--boo

@sleepygamerotaku

@sips-tea-cutely

I tagged 3,924 of my posts in 2022

Only 16% of my posts had no tags

#♡mod chiaki reblogs♡ - 1,399 posts

#♡mod chiaki rambles♡ - 1,293 posts

#♡mod chiaki's asks♡ - 596 posts

#♡vie♡ - 176 posts

#♡shitpost♡ - 153 posts

#♡mod chiaki isn't okay♡ - 100 posts

#f/o; edgar allan poe - 82 posts

#alexis don't look - 60 posts

#♡mod chiaki's a simp♡ - 55 posts

#alexis dont look - 51 posts

Longest Tag: 111 characters

#it's so sjjajsjshsvsgsgsgsjshskhsh😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😳😳😳😳😳😳🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺😭😭😭<3333333333

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

~|Your Hoodie...|~{Part One}

Paring:

Scaramouche X Reader

Prompt:

none

Content Warnings:

angst, cuss words, violence(?), crying, mental breakdown(s), implied established relationship, tue story is written in a first person POV, lmk if i missed anything

Reader pronouns:

not specified (read in first person)

Authors note:

I have been working on this since July 25th of this year... i Have gotten nowhere close to finishing it so i decided to break it up into chapters. this is Chapter one of a -however many parts it takes me to finish this shit- part story. This was inspired by the song Hoodie by Hey Violet! i have cried FAT crocodile tears whenever i would try writinrg onto this so there's that i suppose... Whenever i finish them i will post the next chapters here! might do Scara's POV later on but idk-

❈~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~❈

"You dumbass..." He hissed. Scaramouche always said that me... But he always said it a lighter, semi-playful tone. He never truly meant it. But this time... It was mean. He said it with genuine anger, evidently clear in his voice. The same voice that always teased me... The same voice that lulled me back to sleep whenever i had a nightmare... The same exact voice that gave me butterflies.

The same exact voice I used to love, now filled with hatred and anger. I know he had a short temper. I accepted that the day we met. "You never shut up... And you don't listen either..." He heaved at me again, the tone of his voice was still angry... Because he wasn't just angry... He was infuriated. Infuriated at me. I felt the tears as they stung the corner of my eyes. I didn't bother wiping them away as they rolled down my cheeks.

I've witnessed him snap before. But he's never snapped at me... "I'm... Just... FUCKING DONE WITH YOU!"

He quickly turned around and punched the wall. I thought he going to punch me, so instinctively i flinch, a small squeak escaping my lips as well. I gulp and with all my strength i muster his name. "S-scara-" He simply growled in response, cutting me off. "I CAN'T DEAL WITH YOU ANYMORE!!"

......... And just like that... He stormed out of the door without another word.

I held my hands close to my chest and i let myself fall to the floor. I begin to sob uncontrollably while i clutch onto my shirt and let the crocodile tears fall, and fall, and fall. I continue to cry and screaming in the middle of the living room floor.

I guess he just doesn't love me anymore... I annoyed him too much... I knew i was just a burden to him... Did he even love me to begin with..? Did he mean it when he said he loved me..? Did he mean it when he said he trusted me..? Did he simply take pity on me so he didn't have to see me being pathetic..?

The negative thoughts flowed as quick as my tears and i didn't know what to do... So i kept sobbing. I kept sobbing until it hurt my cheeks. I wiped away the tears and sat there trying to calm down and fully comprehend whatever just happened...

After i calmed down i stood up and glanced at the digital clock on the coffee table. It read [ 1 : 17 AM] usually me and Scara would be asleep in our shared bedroom by now... but he stormed out of the apartment so he wasn't there anymore.

The bed never felt so empty before... I got comfortable underneath the covers but i couldn't fall asleep for awhile... I was too worried about Scaramouche... Was he okay? Where is he going to sleep tonight? Is he even going to be home by tomorrow? He said he couldn't deal with me anymore so i wondered if he would come back. Slowly, drowsiness began to consume me before i finally fell into a slumber...

(~Time-skip~)

I feel my eyes flutter open and the light of the sun seeped through the windows of the bedroom. Last night was playing on repeat in my mind. It's all i can think about.

"You never shut up... And you don't listen either... I'm... Just... FUCKING DONE WITH YOU!"

I thought of Scaramouche's irritated voice and cruel words that he directed at me. I didn't even realize i was crying and hugging his pillow until my tears fell on my hand. There really isn't a reason for me to still be upset over all of this.

I slide out of bed and stand up. I don't move i just stand at the side of my bed. No thoughts filled my mind i simply stood there. My eyes slowly wandered around the room before setting on my closet door.

I heaved a heavy breathe and started walking. I might as well change out of the clothes i was wearing now. I don't have anything better to do anyways. Scara isn't here anymore and i don't even know if he will come back. He probably hates me now...

I slide open the closet door and look at all the clothes i have. but there was another half of clothes that weren't mine.

inside the closet was Scaramouche's hoodie that he always wore. he would wear it all day and put it away before bed... he must be so cold without it...

See the full post

72 notes - Posted December 4, 2022

#4

Deteriorate

Paring:

Chuuya Nakahara x Dying!Reader

Prompt:

None

Content Warnings:

Angst, slight violence, death, slight swearing, lmk if i missed any potential triggers pls!!

Reader pronouns:

Not mentioned

Authors note:

I started writing this like- a month ago I think?? Either way i hope you enjoy!! This is supposed to take place before Dazai leaves the Port Mafia just so you know. Also yea im aware that Chuuya gets exhausted after using his corruption but sShShhHhhUUuSHhhHh

❈~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~❈

Chuuya Nakahara's maniacal laughter echoed throughout the woodland area. The gravity-defying plasma balls flung from his hands and onto the ground practically exploding on impact.

The more he would throw the more aggressive he would get. It's not like he enjoyed this. He couldn't control himself. He never could control himself when he uses corruption.

Before Chuuya activated his corruption he told you run away as far from him as possible. He couldn't risk hurting you while on his blind uncontrollable rage. But of course, you didn't want leave Chuuya. You needed reassurance that he'd be safe.

You hid a little bit away behind a tree, watching Chuuya from afar. Each orb of energy he threw slowly but surely were getting more and more close to you.

The enemy was already taken out so there was no need for Chuuya's corruption to still be activated.

It didn't take long for Dazai to take notice of your stubbornness. Dazai ran as quickly as possible to Chuuya to cancel his ability before he could hit you.

You noticed how dangerously close Chuuya was to you so you tried to run away from him. You 'tried' to run but you didn't succeed.

Dazai was so close to grabbing ahold of Chuuya's arm. However Dazai's fingers barely grazed his skin. Chuuya lifted his arm and released a large ball of energy. In you're direction. It was too late.

There was a blinding surge of light followed by an intense blast that sent all nearby debris flying. The moment of the impact Daizai grabbed Chuuya's arm frantically.

The first thing he heard when Chuuya regained control over himself was something he never wanted to hear.

Your screams filled the air. Chuuya's vision cleared only to blur once more as tears swelled in his eyes. He jerked his arm from Dazai and ran to the source of the screams.

The screaming slowly died down into uneven breathing. Chuuya lowered himself to your body that was laying limp on the ground. Your eyes barely stayed open for mere seconds before closing.

"B-babe!" Chuuya yelled wrapping his arms around you pulling you closer to him "Shit. Babe... Are you okay..?" He tried to remain calm but when his questions where only answered with silence he began to loose his cool. His eyes widened as he held you gently in his arms.

Tears started to well up inside his eyes. "Damnit! Ple- please..! Just fucking answer me please! Say something! Don't... Die on me..." He cried over your body that was slowly growing more cold.

"Chu- i- l-love........ Y-you.........." You manage to finally breathe out. Chuuya's panic only thickened his tears grew larger and more flowing until they where warm rivers flowing down his sore cheeks that where throbbing from how much he was screaming and sobbing

"NO! Y-YOU CAN'T JUST LEAVE ME HERE ALL BY MYSELF!"

He pulled you're cold, heavy body to his chest, like he always did... But he didn't hear you're sweet breathes and he didn't feel you're intoxicating heartbeat like he always did. All he heard, all he felt, and all he saw... It was nothing but empty silence that was being drowned out by you're lovers frantic cries.

"Y-you idiot.... How... Could you just die on me... Without a fight... Without even a final kiss goodbye...!?"

See the full post

84 notes - Posted May 27, 2022

#3

reblog to boop the nose of the person you reblogged from

104 notes - Posted June 30, 2022

#2

Chuuya Nakahara Comfort Headcanons

Paring:

Chuuya Nakahara x reader

Prompt:

None

Content Warnings:

Lmk if there's anything triggering pls!

Reader pronouns:

Not mentioned

Authors note:

I think this is the quickest I've ever written anything. Usually it takes at least a few weeks for me to finish something and i finished this in one day. Anyway @chuuyas--boo this is dedicated to you!

❈~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~❈

♡　Chuuya absolutely hates seeing you sad. He wants you to be happy. You're like a ray of sunshine for him, and it really upsets him to see you so down.

♡　If it was someone who said or did something that made you feel like this, they'd better pray that Chuuya takes pity on them. Someone had the audacity to hurt his love? Chuuya will make them go through hell for that.

♡　But if you're just feeling sad then Chuuya will pull you into his lap(doesn't matter if you're taller than him or not, the mans got thighs of steel/hj) and hold onto you while telling you everything he loves about you.

♡　Will literally cuddle you until you either feel better or tell him to stop. Of course if you tell him to stop he'll get all pouty and disappointed.♡　Chuuya loves you're smile so much it isn't even funny. He would give almost anything to see you smile and hear you laugh.

♡　Will try distracting you with cuddles and affection. If that doesn't work well just have to tickle the sadness away.

♡　He is a low-key softie and nobody will tell me different. At first he seems really blunt and acts as though he doesn't give a damn about anyone or their feelings.

♡ But in private? That's a completely different story. He can and he will give you affection for hours on end. He doesn't have off button either.

♡　He will do absolutely anything for you. Wether it be doing something for you or simply being they're. He's all hands on deck if means you're happy.

♡　Also i know that i already mentioned this but he will not hesitate to throw hands with whoever tries to hurt you in any way. He is very protective of you.

♡　If you need anything don't even bother getting up. Chuuya will immediately make you sit back down, and then he'll wander off. He'll end up coming-out lol t back with whatever it was you needed as well as a warm blanket and cup of hot chocolate, with a bonus gravity hug.

♡　Words of affirmation go brrr

♡　"I'm so proud of you babe" "you have no idea how lucky i am to be with you" "I love you so much. I hope you know that" "Your so strong" "you deserve all the hugs and kisses in the world plus more!"

♡　He love's kissing you in certain areas and telling you why Loves them. Hell kiss you're nose and say that it's so cute and fun to boop. He'll kiss you're knuckles and tell you that he loves holding you're hand and how he wishes he could never let go. The list goes on and on.

♡　If you ever say that there's something you don't like about yourself he will tell you at least 68 reasons why he loves that about you.

♡　He wants you be happy so whenever you're sad you can count on him to make you feel better.

♡　He love's you too much to see you hurting. All he wants is for there to be a sincere smile on your face and happiness to loom in your eyes. Because to Chuuya, everything about you is perfect in every way.

>××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××<

thank you for reading! reblogs are greatly appreciated<3 please don't copy/translate my works to different platforms.

191 notes - Posted May 30, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

imagine having a f/o who's life mission is to fluster you

262 notes - Posted June 22, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

Noisy Quiet

series: gbf pairing: Athena/Medusa word count: 2845 rating: G summary: Coming to the ancient battlefield never bodes well for Medusa, and that's especially true when she's here with Satyr.

[AO3]

freed from cursed fire gw so ofc I have to shitpost about it but the idea of athena and michael getting along really well and making medusa jealous is just so funny to me

Medusa kicks at the dirt for what feels like the hundredth time. It might as well be at this point. They're supposed to be resting but she feels like doing anything but that right now. How can she rest when these two next to her are having the most boring conversation?

"—if you had been surrounded, would it not have been a more prudent decision to fortify the surrounding area with barricades and traps to provide for a better defense?" Athena says.

"Yes, I had the same thought at the time too, but I had received intel from Raphael that our enemies were planning a strike at dawn—"

Medusa tunes out before Michael can finish.

She takes a look around the camp, trying to see what might scratch her itch of boredom. That human man with the dragon blood wandered off somewhere but Medusa had caught him staring a little too intently at the grass earlier and she decided in that moment she was better off not knowing. There's Silva off to the side and while Medusa could grace her with her presence, Silva's cleaning up her gun and she looks too focused on her task for Medusa to feel comfortable to bother. Medusa doesn't know a lick about guns but looking at all the parts laid out makes her feel like she's going to make something explode if she touches it wrong. Won't be dangerous for her but it might be for Silva so... no thanks! She doesn't even know where Djeeta and the others are, probably off somewhere with that other erune girl with the guns.

Ugh, where did Satyr even get up to this time? Medusa can't believe she's even asking for Satyr to keep her company. How desperate must she be? She's just... so annoyed. Maybe she should risk the cold and find a nice spot somewhere and curl up with Medusiana instead. Anything to get away from listening to these two going on and on and on about the most boring things!

"Being commander of an army is... a huge undertaking. There are many things to consider and—"

"—can only imagine. I have only overseen local militia and very rarely do the places I visit have trained soldiers—"

... ugh.

Medusa stretches herself out, wiggling her toes and grimacing at how much they ache. She'd spent most of the day running circles around the monsters and primal beasts so her feet are killing her. Spending the night resting will put her back in top form for the next day...

"—rd to connect to the mortals as well, our interests do not always line up but you profess to acting—"

"—ther hard, isn't it? The lives of mortals are so quick and they seem to—"

... but she's not going to get any rest if she listens to them any longer. But maybe they should go back to their previous conversation. Anything's better than this downer of a subject.

"At least talk about something interesting!" she mutters. Nothing but hearing the two of them talk like this for the last... how much time has passed? It feels like hours and hours and hours. But if she has to hear one more thing about battle tactics—

A pair of hands cover her eyes suddenly but Medusa already knows who it is before hearing the laughter. "Ahaha, Meddy! Stare too hard and you might end up petrifying them!"

"Hey—let go of me!" Before Medusa can grab Satyr's wrists, her friend is already letting go and giggling next to her instead. "Where did you even disappear off to?!"

"Just taking a look around the island and seeing if anything's changed since the last time!" Satyr says with a cheer that sounds out of place given the island they're on. Walking around this old battlefield, a remnant of a time neither of them really want to think about? No thanks! Unless Satyr means the last time the two of them had been here in the past year—yeah that sounds more likely. Medusa looks around. No, doesn't look like anything has changed, except since they're here just right after the start of the new year, it's cold.

"It all just always looks the same as always," Medusa mutters. A chilly wind blows across at that moment and she shivers, wrapping her arms around herself. When's the last time she came here? It should just be summer for the entire year! Why did she even agree to come to this mission?

Satyr sits down on her other side, still grinning. "Are you cold, Meddy? Is that why you're so grumpy? I'm not Athena but I'll keep you warm too!" Satyr puts an arm around her and pulls her closer.

"What—" Medusa is struggling but at the same time, Satyr is is warm, she can't deny that. Well! If Athena's going to spend all her time with her new friend, then what's it to her!

"Medusa?"

Except Athena, and Michael too now, are looking at her. Satyr's eyes are sparkling; Medusa doesn't like that look in her eyes.

"W-what is it?" Medusa asks, voice coming out gruffer than she'd intended. At least Athena doesn't notice it though, but she can hear Satyr giggling next to her again so she elbows her in the side to shut her up.

"Ah, it is..." Athena looks confused for a second, which confuses Medusa too. She only holds up her hand instead of speaking, and Medusa's horrified to find that her tail's wrapped around her wrist.

Medusa makes a sound. What kind of sound, she's not sure, but some kind of sound comes out of her. Or maybe that's just Satyr cackling. One of those. All the while, Athena continues to hold up her arm, expression otherwise unflappable if it weren't for the confused blinking.

"That! That's!" Medusa uncoils her tail from Athena and pointedly stares ahead of her, refusing to look at either Satyr or Athena. This is the last thing she needs right now! Aren't they supposed to be resting? Why are they working her up right now?

"I'm sorry, Medusa, are you upset?" Athena asks, and moves closer to her. Medusa freezes when she feels Athena's arm brushing up against hers. Luckily, or unluckily, before Medusa can say anything, Satyr comes between them, throwing her arms around the both of them.

"Meddy isn't upset! In fact, she'd wish you'd sit closer—ahaha, don't glare at me like that! But don't worry about it, we're all primal pals here in the end!" Satyr turns to Michael, who's been doing a terrible impression of trying not to eavesdrop. "And that includes you too! Even if you're a little older—ooh, maybe you'll just be like a senior primal pal! Like how the skydwellers sometimes give discounts to the elderly skydwellers!"

"... and what would that even do for her? We don't even sell anything!" Medusa points out with a huff, still miffed about Satyr's earlier comment.

"She can have front row tickets to one of Baally's concerts!" Satyr answers without even missing a beat.

"Baal is holding a concert?" Athena perks up suddenly. "I would like to attend."

"No he's not!" Medusa quickly says before she gets any more funny ideas. Well, actually, she doesn't really know that, but she's not about to correct herself right now about it either.

"This Baal..." Michael suddenly speaks up, looking thoughtful suddenly. "He is also a primal beast like us? And he performs in front of people?"

"Yeah! He's so amazing, you should hear him!" Satyr leaps at the chance to gush about her friend and Medusa takes the opportunity to pull Athena away from the other two before Satyr talks both their ears off. Hmph, it's nothing Medusa can't say either—wait, not that she wants to talk about that grump right now. She feels sorry for Michael though, who looks like she's bitten off more than she can chew.

"Medusa? Is something the matter?" Athena asks. She's confused, and Medusa scowls at her.

"Don't give me that! We've got two more days of being out here and you're not getting proper rest!"

"Proper rest? I am—" and Athena happens to yawn right at that moment. She smiles sheepishly. They don't exactly need sleep the way the mortals do, but it helps them conserve their strength so it's not exactly a bad idea to sleep, especially for someone like Athena.

"Forgive me, Medusa. I had simply lost track of time when conversing with Michael. To learn that there is another being far older than even Sandalphon himself, and that she'd been the steward to elemental fire itself—ah, my curiosity might have made me... overenthusiastic."

"Yeah, yeah, she's amazing," Medusa mutters, wishing there wasn't this terrible knot forming inside of her. She knows what it is, and it isn't like she wants to feel this way, but seeing Athena get so awed over someone else... bleh, just a few more hours and she'll be able to take her frustration out! But who would've thought that they've managed it, finding someone even more serious than Athena.

But it also isn't to say that Medusa's not impressed too! It makes sense to Medusa that the Astrals have always been experimenting with making living weapons, and that she and those created five hundred years ago aren't their first experiments... but she's never thought that it was possible for the older primal beasts to still be around. At least, like Athena said, it's never occurred to her that there might also be other beings that are as old or even older than the Supreme Primarch himself.

"I confess though, I'm curious about something else. You feel it too, don't you?" Athena glances over at Michael, who's still forced to listen to Satyr as she regales her about further feats of her primal pals.

"Hmm." Medusa crosses her arms, her tail swishing side to side. She knows exactly what Athena is talking about but trying to put it into words is hard. Since joining their team, there's been a sort of... underlying empowerment to them that they've never felt before. She knows it has to be something with Michael because for all the times they've gone through this ancient battlefield, this is the very first time she's ever felt like this. Even Satyr keeps remarking about how she's raring to go even after hours of fighting. And it isn't only affecting the primal beasts too; it seems to make the other mortals who've come with them stronger as well.

What exactly is that power, then? Is it something because she's one of the first primal beasts? Or is it because of her former position as primarch of fire? Medusa's core element isn't even fire so why does she also feel the same way as Athena? Does being a primarch come with other perks? She can't even begin to understand exactly what being in that role calls for but whatever the case, Michael's very presence is making them all stronger. Somehow.

"Just some other weird Astral stuff," Medusa decides, waving her hand. "I don't even understand half the things they were trying to do but hey, if it makes us all stronger and get us through this mission faster, then I'm not going to complain!"

"The Astrals, hm..." Athena looks lost in thought now, and Medusa doesn't doubt all the strange conclusions running through her mind. Wait, no, the last thing she needs is Athena's imagination running wild.

"But never mind that! Regardless of whether or not we're stronger this time around, it doesn't change the fact that you"—she jabs her finger at Athena—"need to get some rest! You think I don't notice how you can barely stand after our battles?!"

Athena blinks at her, surprised. "You've noticed?"

"Of course! Why wouldn't I!" Medusa huffs at her. "Seriously, never a single thought in your own head about yourself!"

"Oh..." Athena looks away, now looking down at her hands.

"Heheh, Athena! You should have heard her before we left on the mission!" Satyr's suddenly next to them, grinning widely that Medusa feels like her face is going to hurt the more she looks at her. "'Of course we're gonna be fine, Athena's with us! She's going to cover us and we can go all out!'" She giggles afterward. "And she was right! I've never seen Meddy so pumped up before! I mean she's always so cool and cute but this time around she's even more fired up—mmmmphfghfgmmm!"

"Stop! Stop talking! Why are you telling her this!" Medusa hisses, struggling to keep her hand on Satyr's mouth. Satyr is still waving her hands all around but she looks at Athena and gives her a thumbs-up. Medusa slaps that hand away too and Satyr is giggling again, the sound muffled behind her hand.

"Medusa, you..." Medusa freezes before slowly turning around, half afraid of what she's going to find. Athena is looking at them, and her eyes look a little misty—oh no, this is terrible, why is Athena such a sap?

"I understand completely now, Medusa. I must get my proper rest so that I will be able to support you as the rearguard. I swear on my shield that I will not let you down!" She looks so grave and solemn about it that Medusa makes a choked sound. It's always unfair, how honest Athena can be that Medusa doesn't know what to say.

"Why do you always have to take it so seriously," she mutters.

"Yeah!" Satyr uses the distraction to break out of Medusa's hold, pumping a fist now. "We gotta make sure Meddy is out there in top form! Go out there and do your best, Meddy! We'll be cheering you on too!"

"Wha—don't make me do all the work!"

"Of course not! But you're so cool when you're acting so tough and giving it your all up there and it just makes me want to stop and watch you instead! Isn't that right, Athena?!"

Athena blinks, looking back and forth between them. To Medusa's horror, she agrees with a nod. "Yes, I understand. Medusa always works so hard."

"Gah! Stop saying that—stop!" Medusa wishes there were a way to hide out red her face is. Somehow, listening to the both of them makes her feel even more embarrassed than Satyr's teasing. Of course she's strong and powerful but they're laying it on a little too thick right now!

... it feels nice listening to them talk about her like that. She's never going to tell them that, because then Satyr will never shut up about it if she does, but it feels nice to hear that from them. It's good to be appreciated around here! That terrible feeling from earlier is going away, and Medusa wants it to not come back.

Wait, why are they suddenly on this topic? What were they talking about before—"Gah!" Medusa turns to Athena, hissing. "This wasn't supposed to be about me! You still need to make sure to get your rest!"

"Oh!" Athena nods her head, smile turning apologetic. "Of course, Medusa. I will need all my strength to keep up with you tomorrow."

"Like I said, you don't have to keep laying it on that thick..."

"Rest is important, yes. If our battles for the next few days will grow tougher as the Singularity tells me, we will need all our power," Michael says as she now stands over them where they've been sitting on the ground. She doesn't have her wings or battle regalia right now, only dressed in those simple skydweller clothes they had first seen her in. Medusa's glad for it, because the glow of power and fire from her means no one would get any sleep if they had a literal lantern next to them all the time. Still, even in these regular clothes, Michael cuts an impressive figure, Medusa will admit that.

"Ooh, Michael, Michael!" Satyr gestures for her to take a seat next to them. Michael does so, sitting cross-legged, and she looks more like a confused snake thrown out of the grass now instead of... all her big fancy titles. Medusa can recognize that sort of look, considering how many times Athena's done it. "One more thing! You wanna listen to all the cool things Meddy's done in the last few centuries? Like that one time she saved me from a monster and she looked soooooo cool—"

"Gah, stop talking! What happened to getting some rest?!" Medusa tries to slap her hand over Satyr's mouth but Satyr leans out of the way and hides behind Athena, using her as a shield now. That's not even fair at all! And now Athena's looking at both her and Satyr, eyes twinkling with that troublesome curiosity.

"If you could continue, Satyr, I am very interested in hearing this story too."

"Stop!" But of course, no one listens to her and to Medusa's horror, even Michael is listening intently.

Only a few more days, Medusa tells herself, only a few more days...

I had been stuck in the Dark World for who knows how long. The days didn’t seem to matter down here. No sun, no moon, just the vibrant green grid that coated the sky that would twitch and surge with occasional frequency.  When I first got here, I fought hard to get back to the surface, to fight for any sense of normalcy, for home but after a while the dream began to fade. The options began to run dry when compared to the dangers that surrounded me. And so I settled. I survived. I searched for food, begged for shelter from kind Darkners. I did what I had to to live. The Queen was not an option. Whispers from Darkners told me how I was just what she was looking for, that would help her expand her reign to the Light World. As much as that would probably help me, I didn’t want to ruin the lives of others for the chance to see my family, as much as I missed them with every passing minute. The sound of bustling cars and the blinding lights of neon signs stung my senses, my palms pressing into my eyes to drown out what I could. Damn it this place never slept did it? There was always something, some sort of noise. Whatever bags I had under my eyes were probably made cartoonishly drastic with the lack of pure rest I was getting. ‘Supose it was better then being dead... My body felt heavy, and I knew I’d have to find a place to rest or I’d fall asleep mid crossing of a road and get run over by one of those goofy cars I’d seen. Maybe that wouldn’t be so bad... I recalled the time one of the car’s rear bumped into a fire hydrant (or at least I thought it was) and made a squeaking sound. The darkness of a certain alley called to me, the silence a sweet lullaby to the roaring around me. Was it dangerous? Oh yeah. Was it stupid? No shit. Was I going to do it? The shadows the engulfed me were perfect and if it wasn’t for the underlying stench of garbage it’d probably be ideal. Still beggars couldn’t be choosers and if tonight was good enough I would have to consider having this as my permanent sleeping spot. My back slid against the cool wall across from the dumpster, eyes half lidded as they read the advertisements littering above. Why the hell did the Queen have ads anyway, if she wanted she could monopolize any products she wanted... Despite the quiet I couldn’t shake the feeling that creeped down my spine. The presence of something other then myself around me. I tried to close my eyes, I was in the city after all. It’d be concerning if I didn’t feel like people were one second from crawling up my ass. Though I had to admit I didn’t expect to actually feel something begin to touch me. My eyes snapped open, elbow prodding into a blurry shape that yelped and tumbled backward, it’s grasp my on shoulder tearing a hole in my already worn shirt in the struggle. “Hey! What the hell?!” I barked, standing over the perpetrator. My shoulders slumped when I saw what looked to be a doll staring up at me with wide eyes, an over exaggerated smile permanently spread across it’s face. The creature’s jaw opened wider with a clack, it’s small body shooting upwards to stand on it’s small pointed feet. “WOAH WOAH WOAHAH- [Live worms]!”   The darkner’s voice was deafeningly loud, a shrill tone that cut the air like newly sharpened blades. “ I THOUGHT YOU WERE [Roadkill]. NICE TO KNOW I WON’T BE [Sleeping with the fishes] T0NIGHT!!” Well he had a certain way of speaking that was obvious. What the hell was going on with him, he talked like he was constantly being cut of random clips of other people speaking. He talked like a youtube poop or any other shitpost that would randomly shove memes into them for a quick laugh. “You thought I was dead? I was just... I was... uh.” I looked around me, eyeing the dirt and debris. “I was... going to sleep... here.”  Dammit, telling people I had to sleep in such ratty places were always a blow to the ego but I suppose it was better then saying ‘Oh I was just sitting down here to die’ The puppet shook his head and waltzed over to the dumpster, his small hand smacking the side with a sense of pride. “ [Finders keepers, losers weepers] HUMAN, YOU PICKED A GOOD SPOT. TOO BAD [so sadd] I GOT HERE FIRST. THOUGH FOR A DEAL I SUPPOSE I COULD [Share the love~]” “Got here first... what are you talking about?” The Darkner let out a laugh, distorted echoes filling the air as he leapt inside, a solitary hand popping out to beg me to come closer. This was a terrible idea, but despite my best judgement I followed, and witnessed what I could only describe to be a makeshift bed inside.  The puppet laid on top of musty mats and raggedy rugs, a single stained pillow resting just beneath his head. My god was he living in here? The creature continued his laugh, lurching only a few inches away from my face. “ [Sweet deal] ISN’T IT? J3ALOUS, [baby]?”  I shirked back, cheeks reddening at the tone of his last word. I was most defiantly not jealous, in fact I was filled with remorse, something his pride did not help with. “It’s... uh something. I guess this means I’ll have to find another alleyway um, sorry for bothering you-” “SPAMTON.” “What?” His hand shot out towards my chest, fingers wiggling for a handshake. “SP-SPA MTON G SPAMTON, [Number 1 rated salesmen 1997]” He announced, an extra flair of bravado laced his titled. His hand was surprisingly warm for what it was made of but nothing that would be described as body temperature.  “Jenna. Also 1997.” “WHAT A YEAR. LISTEN LIGHT nER, I AM DEALSMAN [yes/no?]” “Um... y-yes? I don’t-” “THEN LET ME MAKE A DEAL YEAH? FOR ONLY [many] KROMER, YOU MAY STAY IN MY [Privately owned] ALLEY. IT’S A REAL [steal] YOU’RE ROBBING ME [deaf] HERE!” My brows furrowed as I searched his face for any context clues for what the hell he was trying to say. Kromer? What the fuck was ‘kromer’? The only thing I knew of currency down here was dark dollars not kromer... even if he did ask for dark dollars he didn’t name a price, he just said many. And the amount of dark dollars I had was zero. “Uh I don’t have kromer. I don’t even have dark dollars I’m kinda broke Spamton, in case you couldn’t tell from uh...” I trailed off realizing saying that sleeping in an alley wasn’t a very smart thing to say to someone who slept in an alley.  He seemed surprised by my words, beginning to tug on my coat, flipping my pockets to see if I was really lying. I had to push his mitts off me a couple of times, to which he eventually got the idea the way his hands began to rub at his extended jaw. “NO KROMER... WHAT CAN YOU DO?” “What do you mean?” He seemed to sense my change in tone, his grin beginning to wobble nervously “[Whoopsie daisy!] LET ME START AGAIN. DO YOU HAVE A [trade]? A [skill] TO [Exchange for goods and services]?” he croaked. I eyed the ground, rubbing the back of my neck. What the hell was I good at again? “I mean, I can draw, I suppose...” “ARTIST? WOW OWOW!” Spamton’s face lit up before digging in the dumpster, pulling out a few napkins and a ball point pen and shoving them into my hands. “WHAT A [trade] TELL YOU WHAT. YOU DRAW A [one-of-a-kind masterpiece] AND YOU CAN STAY THE NIGHT!” “You’ll let me stay... if I draw something for you on this napkin. Am I getting that right?” The doll nodded feverishly, basically hovering over my shoulder as I played with the pen. This was certainly the weirdest way to pay someone that I could imagine... well no but one that was in the realm of reality. I had to ask Spamton to give me some space a few time, the feeling of his breath on  my neck making me more then nervous as I drew. God he was like those kids in school that would ask for drawings but ten times worse with the amount of personal space he’d give you. Besides I needed something to draw and with nothing on the mind why not draw the most interesting thing in front of me. I held the finished doodle out to Spamton only to have it snatched out of my fingers so fast I swore we could have started a fire. “WOAH...” The puppet sank inside of the dumpster, his face softening  as for once in what seemed like forever the alley way grew silent. “THIS IS... ME?” “Yeah. Sorry I didn’t know what to draw, you kind of put me on the spot. Besides everyone likes drawings of themselves right?” I shrugged, being pulled away from my thoughts by an overdramatic sniffle. Was he... crying? Not quite, just damn well close. Spamton’s shoulders quaked as a warm smile returned to his cheeks, slipping the napkin into his pocket with glee. “SO GOOD... THANK YOU.” “It’s really nothing, honestly that was a pretty shitty drawing.” “WHAT? YOU’RE [&#!^]ING ME! THAT WAS [BIG SHOT]” He was screaming again, hands gesturing wildly about. “It wasn’t but thank you. I wish I was better to be honest. I’m not very happy with my art, not at all.” I turned away from his gaze, unsure of why I was overcome by a choking sensation building my throat.  Why the hell was I telling this stranger this sort of stuff anyway? I mean I could hazard a guess it was the fact that this was the longest conversation I had had with anyone since I had gotten down here but with how things were it could be some magic power the doll possessed to tell him my deepest darkest secrets. “YOU DON’T THINK THIS IS [Big?]” “No.” “WHY NOT?” “I don’t know. I just... I think it doesn’t look the way I want it to. Doesn’t look good to me, and I don’t know how to fix it. Which I guess is a little funny considering how long I’ve been drawing. Just keep... drawing and drawing and never improving, least not how I’d like. It’s just garbage to me.” Spamton’s face seemed to fall, his glasses fading to a dark inky black.  “YOU FEEL? NO GOOD AT WHAT YOU DO? YOUR [passion]?”  “Yeah.” A laugh ripped from his chest, his head lolling back with each chuckle. I felt my soul began to crack, a shame flooding my body with how hard he seemed to laugh. Did he find this funny? Humorous?  I felt tears prick my eyes as I snapped my head back to glare at him, his head glitching back to stare back at me. “YOU’RE JUST LIKE ME, JENNA. A [slime] A REAL [slime]!” With a quick motion the puppet jumped to the ground, his hand resting against my arm as he spoke.  “YOU’RE A REAL [BIG SHOT] YOU KNOW THAT? STAY AS LONG AS YOUR [Greasy little heart] DESIRES!” Well... that was unexpected. He’d really let me stay here as long as I want cause I was pathetic? Or did he just feel sorry for me? What was going on? And why was he calling me a slime... or us a slime?  “Oh... uh thanks? I didn’t think I was being  much of a big shot whatever that is but I apricate it. Really.” His head clacked with every little nod, leading me to a pile of cardboard boxes and patting them with the grace of a car salesman. “BEST [Seat in the house] ALL FOR YOU. [Night night forever]!” Spamton beamed, awkwardly swaying side to side before stumbling back to the dumpster a few inches away and crawling inside of it, much like a wild animal. I couldn’t help but laugh a little. This guy was weird. Kinda creepy but also kind of funny. I honestly couldn’t pinpoint a feeling on him but at least he didn’t want to hurt me just make weird ass deals and make me ‘big’. Did that mean famous? Was this guy so into my art he wanted to be some sort of manager? I rubbed my eyes and let out a yawn, the excitement of the day finally beginning to fade. God I forgot how tired I was, that little guy made me feel like I was gonna go into fight or flight.  “Hey Spamton?” “YES?” his voice echoed from inside the metal container. “...Thank you.”

FUCK IT, DREAM SMP HOMESTUCK AU

but it's only half shitposts and there are actual Thoughts in there.

You don't need to have read the comic to understand because I tried not to spoil anything major, but it'd help if you knew basic stuff about classpects, SBURB and the hemospectrum.

disclaimer: i'm not a good pixel artist and this is my first actual sprites ever so please be kind to my weird pixels

The Kids:

Tommy

Fundy

Techno

Tubbo

tommy, tubbo and fundy one of the kids because they're the kids in dream smp canon (with fundy being son of wilbur)

techno's there because i want to make a dave strider reference (haha get it because techno's name is also da-- *gets shot) and also because they are both coolguys except instead of using irony, techno has adhd

The Trolls:

Wilbur Soohte (fuschia)

?????? Ehrret (violet)

J????? Shlatt (purple)

Nihacu Niikki (indigo)

Skeppy Diamon (cerulean)

Quacki Tthiey (teal)

Philza Myncra (jade)

Dreame Wastkn (lime disguising as olive)

George Notfou (gold)

Sapphe Nahfpe (bronze)

Badboy Haelow (burgundy)

don't come at me saying only females are allowed to be jades and fuschias; gender is fake and this is an au

more of the AU and the talksprites are under the cut:

Tommy

Lunar sway: Derse. Types in: Red

chaotic. the first person to be introduced.

when he gets introduced instead of the “Zoosmell Pooplord” bit, Tommy is initially going to be the name inputted but then backspaced it and decided that Tommyinnit was better and he was fuming until he’s named Tommy.

Gives me big Blood/Hope vibes. Blood because a lot of the conflict of the dream smp connected to someone breaking his trust or harming the things he cares about, Hope because a lot of the plot of the dream smp stems from Tommy starting shit based on his ideals and what he thinks is right.

the first to instigate fighting against the trolls

bbh contacts him once and tommy keeps cursing until he disconnects from frustration rip

wields Gunkind and his only strife weapon at the beginning is the Vlog gun. He has Gunkind as his strife specibus mainly because he looked up at schlatt and he imitates him.

Fundy

Lunar sway: Prospit. Types in: Orange

it was his idea to play SBURB but only through Dream.

he talks to dream the most among the other trolls fwt stans getcha juice this is the rosemary of the session

dream’s the one giving him exposition about the game so that’s how he knows how to play SBURB.

wilbur trolls fundy once and instantly adopts him.

“You’re my son.” “How does that even work??” “I was one of the people who created your universe. It’s basically the same thing.”

Fundy relents anyway.

Techno

Lunar sway: Derse. Types in: Pink

dave strider but dead-inside voice + rose lalonde english major vibes

he slices the text box when you try to name him "Dave " like in

techno gives me time player vibes (contantly on the move. his skyblock series, his “stays in the pit” monologue,) but also rage vibes (anarchy,  the “theseus” monologue, political alignment is Chaos) alas i am not sure what class

uses Tridentkind and claims "it came from god"

 it was dream, he accidentally transportalized one of wilbur’s weapon while he testing the transportalizer.

Tubbo

Lunar sway: Prospit. Types in: Green

the jade harley of this session. the only thing keeping them from going apeshit. where would they be without him.

but also jade harley in a sense that he seems nice and wholesome but also don’t fuck with them they can mess you up

Heart/Life vibes??? someone good at classpecting help

i put them in prospit bc of the "tubbo third eye" instead of tubbo having a sixth sense or smth, they see the future from the clouds of skaia when they sleep

wields Stress-relieverKind at some point

bonus: everyone’s actual hair colors

Ideas about the Trolls

no i haven’t done their sprites yet bc it would take so much time and i’m not even sure if people wanna see more of this au skjdkdsakdfkl,, but i have Design Ideas.

events of the dsmp revolution are just a FLARP session drawing parallels to how the homestuck trolls had a FLARP session that spoiler alert: destroyed friendships. dtrio, eret, will are involved. eret betrays will's faction and wilbur's still Bitter over that.

on the context of alternia (highbloods and lowbloods) lmanburg and dreamsmp have their roles SWAPPED.  the emancipation theme thing is completely gone since highbloods are in more power than the lowbloods (the dream team) . 

wilbur made a faction called l’manburg because he wants a place where he and his fellow highbloods could make drugs vibe.they take a piece of land that was owned by the dream team. in normal circumstances, they shouldve stood down because lowbloods aren't supposed to start shit with highbloods (especially a group of highbloods that has the alternian heir among them)  but dream turned it into an activism thing about lowblood rights. the story plays as close as possible without tommy or tubbo in it (which is pretty hard ik but this is the best can do).

like in the dreamsmp revolution, dream kinda let wilbur do what he wants but this time he has more reason to because he’s in a lower caste. dream really only fought back when wilbur announced that he’d be building lmanburg on their land and calling it theirs.

eret betrays wilbur by supporting the lowbloods and wilbur and co. technically won but only because he finally called the drones in, as a reference to how lmanburg absolutely got crushed by the dream team in the smp but technically won. l’manburg keeps the piece of land and the dream team scatter away to find a new home.

wilbur soot's a fuschia because a) he's in a position that has a lot of power, b) yknow how he wrote a song about squids and his thing with sally… yeah.

eret's a violet because nobility!! dream looks down on him because he's ambivalent on fighting for lowblood rights when he's in a power to do so "you just sit there, and you look pretty that's it"

also like eridan he has a minor aesthetic mutation (herobrine eyes) that won't classify him as a mutant.

jschlatt is purple because it makes sense thematically because of the gamzee parallels (a. substance abuse b. if you know what happens in act 6, you know this already but spoiler alert, he ruins the main protagonists' lives) also he's a funnyman he deserves the clown caste

 quackity's a teal because he’s a law student. moving on--

 ok but for real it also makes sense thematically because he's the one who wrote the thing that tricked schlatt into agreeing also he gets manipulated by schlatt which also draws parallels to certain events in the comic

skeppy and bbh are BEST FRIENDS despite being highblood and lowblood respectively. initially, skeppy just wanted to bother bbh but they grew to be good friends in time. y’know like how they actually becane friends :D

philza minecraft is a jade because dad friend. also works thematically, because spoiler alert he gets to murder a seadweller for going batshit crazy. 

he also god tiers early. he dies fighting his quick undead denizen (haha baby zombie) but the consorts of his land carry him to his quest bed because he’s treated them all so well.

dream was initially going to be another caste but then i realized that means i have to make his hoodie something other than green which is unacceptable so its a good thing the fact that he's a lime works out

dream was the one who thought of playing sgrub in the first place- initially only planned to have gogy, sap, and bbh in the session but then realized that they four won't be enough so he invited more into his session

he’s also the first to go godtier ez clap blind speedrun not sure what classpect tho

the only reason why dream avoided being culled at birth for being a limeblood is because his rng is That Good. he quickly picked up the fact that he’s not supposed to exist and masqueraded as an oliveblood and kept mostly to himself to avoid suspicion.

george is still colorblind but he has lazer eyes along with it instead. dream lives with him in the same hive since being a mutant means dream doesn’t get a lusus of his own (dnf fans getcha juice “and they were roommates”) 

despite living in the same hive, he never really figures out that dream is a limeblood. possibly because a) he’s colorblind and when he sees dream bleeding he just sees yellow b) he’s just that fucking oblivious and it’s so valid of him.

sapnap’s a bronzeblood mainly because i know he’s the instigator of the pet war with tommy also because i associate him with the color orang in my mind so bronze it is

that’s the end of this long-ass post!! if you have other ideas PLEASE i want to hear them. i don’t know the other streamers i mentioned in here very well so if you have ideas that would be fitting to them like with classpect or lunar sway that would be GREAT. 

the only thing i’m confident about in here are the kids’ lunar sways. i’m not an expert in classpects and homestuck lore so there’s that too!! i just wanted to make this post because adhd means that the idea wouldn’t shut up until i finished it. This initially started as a single shitpost edit of tommyinnit talksprite but then the hiveswap 2 trailer came out and that means i have to combine my two hyperfixations.

also i have ideas about potential quadrants but idk how much of that is breaking some streamers’ boundaries about shipping (even the non romantic quads such as kismesistude, morallegiance and auspisticism) so i decided not to include it.

edit: apparently people want more so i made a discord server as a place to brainstorm!! please pm me to join!

Check-In Tag

I was tagged by @louisxgolden @chironmybeloved and @wuxien thank you lovelies <3 

1. Why did you choose your url?

so there are these two albums... by these two guys.... 

2. Any side-blogs? If you have them, name them and why you have them.

yes but like barely. u can follow @humancrushhumpday for occasional stuff fhsdgdrstujh

3. How long have you been on tumblr?

my first harry potter/supernatural/photography blog was in 2012 and made another in 2014 but then had a break and returned in 2018.. so i have been actually active for 3 years now

4: Do you have a queue tag?

yes and it’s iconic thank you #just me her and the queue

5. Why did you start your blog in the first place?

Well I made this one in 2014 for gay stuff, and the very first one was for the reasons stated above

6. Why did you choose your icon/pfp?

i’ve had that pic/screenshot of louis as my icon for years now so i can’t change that but i do change his bg every now and the... currently it’s harry’s hands bc they were new pics and i felt like red

7. Why did you choose your header?

it’s a rainbow guitar from an awesome mv do i need say more?

8. Whats your post with the most notes?

this one with the 11k which i don’t understand but i guess it’s bc harry deserves it

9. How many mutuals do you have?

did a quick check and counted about 50, which is almost half of my following list tbh

10. How many followers do you have?

lost 3 yesterday bc my football post :/ which fair

11. How many people do you follow?

people? ikd. blogs? 117 

12. Have you ever made a shitpost?

many

13. How often do you use tumblr a day?

depends on the day sometimes all the fucking time and sometimes only few times a day.. but i do check it every morning with no doubt (to clear notifications mostly)

14. Did you once have a fight/argument with another blog once? Who won?

only friendly fights.. anon fights one the other hand.... i won all of them 

15. How do you feel about "you need to reblog" posts?

whenever someone tells me to do something i immediately don’t want to do that

16. Do you like tag games?

yes i gotta keep myself entertained somehow 

17. Do you like ask games?

sure do but i don’t do them too often

18. Which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

i mean big flex is being friends with dailytomlinson and stylesnews admins (i am one of them)

19. Do you have a crush on a mutual?

not currently but i have been there (and gone beyond and it didn’t work out hdshfgwkja)

20. Tags?

like im i supposed to just add people here or talk about how i tag my posts?? anyway i tag:

@curlyhairedprince @halosboat @wastelandbabylouis @wallsvinyl @quelsentiment @onedirectiom sorry if u did this already! 

Dimmed Lights (Pt.2)

-------------------------

It had been about a month since Remus' wedding, Roman was starting school soon.

Roman despised school.

Soulmates kissing in the halls, marks so bright it was almost blinding. Students asking him why he hadnt found his soulmates yet, asking why his markings were oh so dull.

But his least favorite thing about the school, was the school's favorite power couple.

Roman had known for a while that goth kids were going to end up taking over one day, but this just proved it.

Janus Belgrave was a year above Roman, he was tall and he had heterochromia and canines that were so sharp they might as well have been knives. He always seemed to know everything about a person by looking at them. He was always wearing a hat or a cape, regardless of dress code formality. He had a soul mark shaped like purple and black flowers down one side of his face.

Virgil Liddell was in the same grade as Roman. He was short and shy but he could probably drop kick someone if they made him feel even the slightest bit threatened. He had bright lilac eyes and darker purple hair. His soul mark was in the form of a two-headed snake that wrapped around his neck and collarbone.

The two of them always wore much more clothing than Roman would have deemed necessary, and would get very defensive when asked about it. But, goth kids were weird, so he wasnt going to judge.

Roman sat on his bed, staring at the rows and rows of clothing in his closet. He supposed it was a good thing he didnt have to try fitting himself in there to. After a long while Roman finally decided on a red hoodie with two white stripes in the middle as well as stripes down the sleeves, a pair of shorts, and black boots.

"Roman! Breakfast!" Roman's mother called from downstairs. Roman let out a sigh that wouldve been worthy of an oscar had the timing been convenient. He rushed down the stairs and stuffed his face quickly.

The bus ride wasnt much different than usual, Roman head his head pressed against the window, that way it was much harder to see any of his classmates soul marks.

It was stupid that they were able to find soul mates so young in his opinion, why didnt the marks just develop over time instead? Why couldnt they just be kids without having to worry about who their soulmates would be? But of course, Roman had decided that his lack of understanding for soul mate ages must have just been his jealousy talking. After all, how was a boy with no soul mate supposed to know anything about finding one.

He also supposed that having no friends didnt help that. After all, people with soul marks tended to avoid the Soulless like the plague, it was incredibly rare for someone to be born with no mark at all, and they didnt want to risk that spreading.

So Roman sat alone, every day, during class, lunch, breaks. And he pretended not to care, pretended he didnt notice the suspicious glances the others gave his tattoos, or the rumors or the laughing or anything else that the school tried to throw at him.

"Is this seat taken?" Roman looked away from the window. In front of him was a person with short pastel blue and purple hair, a white dress with a mint green belt and sleeve-straps, and white boots, as well as round glasses with clear frames.

"No, of course not," Roman said simply. The person sat down, fixing their hair slightly.

"I'm Hestia, she/her," Hestia smiled.

"Roman, he/him," Roman said, and then he noticed what seemed to be white lines etched across Hestia's skin.

Hestia seemed to have noticed the staring, because she pulled a jacket over the markings soon after.

"They arent soulmarks if that's what you're thinking, I dont have any, these are from something else," she said, looking away slightly.

"Oh- I didnt mean-" Roman rubbed the back of his neck slightly. Finally, he pulled down the side of his jacket and shirt to show off the tattoos. Hestia's eyes widened and she smiled slightly.

"Are they nicer here? The middle school was never very nice about it," Hestia said, Roman bit his lip slightly.

"Well, they arent rude necessarily, but of course you must know how it is for us," he said sadly.

"Yeah. . . It's so stupid, we can still have relationships, even if we dont have soulmarks, after all they're just for relationships that or more than ordinary friendship, it's not like having no markings means I cant make someone a cake or something," Hestia said bitterly, scratching at the lines on her arms.

"Yeah, and does it make sense to you that we have them from birth? Like why do children have to worry about suddenly glowing in the middle of the playground. It seems a bit contrived if you ask me," Roman said.

"Yeah! I know a person who found their soulmate when they were in sixth grade!" Hestia said. People on the bus were giving the two of them scandalized looks, but at this point Roman didnt really care. He finally had someone to talk to who was like him, who agreed with him and didnt think it was a brutal tragedy that he had no marks.

As the bus ride neared its end Roman and Hestia exchanged numbers, she was a freshman and he was a junior so they knew they were unlikely to have any classes together, but both had agreed that they would meet up after school when they could manage.

But now that he was off the bus, it was back to acting like a terrified gazelle in a jungle of stripes and spots.

Of course, Roman was used to that feeling.

What he wasnt used to was being shoved against a locker by a man a little less than a foot shorter than him, kissed, and then left standing confused in the middle of what seemed to be a very intense argument.

"See! I told you I can catch people off guard! I'm not that loud!" From the looks of it, Goth² was having a very intense debate, and Roman seemed to have found himself right in the center.

"I didnt say you couldnt at all, I just said you're not very good with subtlety," Janus replied, smirking. Virgil's face seemed to be going redder by the minute.

"Oh like you're so good at sneaking around with your- height!" Janus let out a laugh.

"Aaawww, is the chihuahua mad because the Great Dane's better at pranks?" Janus said, ruffling Virgil's hair.

Roman coughed slightly, he hadnt meant to do it, but it seemed to get the two boys attention very easily.

"Ah- yes, Virgil, mind explaining so the damsel you've distressed doesnt think hes ruined a relationship?" Janus said, Roman's face went scarlet.

"Sorry- yeah I couldve probably gone with something else but I'm not exactly a quick thinker ok!" Virgil said, pouting.

"O-oh its alright-" Roman said, trying to cover the rapid blush spreading across his face.

"How about this, to make it up to you, why dont you sit at lunch with us? You're always sitting alone and I highly doubt that its healthy for you," Janus said, smiling.

Roman froze like a deer in headlights, all he could think to do was nod and accept the slips of paper handed to him by the two boys.

"What. The fwuh. Just happened." Was all he could say when they left.

----------------------------------------------

Tag list:

@nerosdayinhell

@sasmeo-bisaster

@sleepy-sphinx

@meowthefluffy

@coconut-cluster

@youtuberswithalex

@astronomical-bagel

@thecolorfulolive

@teamplutoforlife

@treeni

@gothfoxx

@jungle321jungle

@astronomical-bagel

@shitpost-sides

@loveyatothemoonandback

@boobmaster69

@faycanyons

@maryann-draws

@melodiread

@thefivecalls

@willowaudreykeyes

@a-slimyboi

@moxy--sanders101

Sense8 AU!aftg

In the honor of absolutlynothing I’ve decided to put out there one of the many au I have on my phone and archive it there

Big shout out to @a-m-peengoo and @bluesuederose for participating in this mess with genius lines and always be there to bear my 36 ideas per hour. We did a masterpiece girls.

Here we go it’s gonna be long

The cluster:

Kevin: Nomi. He’s just a fuckin hacker who’s running away from his family (riko). When he’s bored, he spends nights crashing the Pentagon system for fun, and makes every screen in the White House play Best Exy Actions Compilation (the longest and hardest part is choosing one compilation to play).

Dan: Will. One of them have to keep them under control. Plus, Dan with a gun i can’t even-

Matt: Riley. Soft, blue strand of hair, a heart of gold, maternal. As a DJ. Yes. SO SOFT (he still knows how to box)

Allison: Capheus. Listen. Imagine Allison in high heels, skin tight leather pants, driving a bus. Also, a F1 pilot champion who can drive anything (even if it’s the first time)

Andrew: Wolfgang. Duh. Do I need to explain myself. Just think abt him saying “This is Berlin. Those are my people. And we go to our knees for no one”.Boy he does NOT like this situation, at all. Will keep the others out with sheer willpower and no blockers. The cluster’s deadliest weapon. PLUS HELLO???? ANDREW IN A PASTEL PINK BOMBER SHOOTING ON A HELICOPTER WITH A BAZOOKA????

Aaron: Felix? Sorta? not a senseate but a great doctor. Senses bullshit and when someone is in Andrew’s body real quick  (Andrew: says more than 2 sentences and is pleasant. Aaron:.....who’s that bitch where is my brother) . Later helps to manufacture blockers.

Neil: Kala. A pharmacist that uses his skill for arson and may or may not be running away from mafia/family matter and currently hiding in India. Him saying “Bring it, bitch” to Riko is my sexuality and Andrew’s. Can create explosives from a Fanta can and spices I mean it’s already canon in aftg. (plus andreil would work even better bc technically Neil can’t even touch Andrew for real)

Nicky: Lito. The drama, the sass. Also the scene where he discovers the Twinyard in Germany are his cousins would be hilarious. The scene where Lito seduces the nurse but with Nicky (“engaging into heterosexual activity? me????”) or the scene where Lito screams in the museum but with Nicky

Erik as Hernando. That’s it that’s the post.

Renee: Sun. I mean, a korean fighter lady in prison trying to be a better person and had a silent bffs relationship with a german gangster? Come on. Also. Allison in a bus and Renee doing art martials stuff. 

Riko: whispers i guess he can eat Allison’s high heels

Now the ~scenes~ (it’s just shitposting):

Aaron, on the verge on several break downs: wait so you have like … DJ Blue Matt and F1 pilot Allison Reynolds in your head? since when? ANDREW SINCE WHE-

*

Neil: what’s a better use of a multiple thousands dollars education than precise arson?????

*

Aaron: why does your boyfriend always end up burning things up?

Andrew: he lits up my heart as well

Aaron: FOR FUCK SAKE

*

Kevin, shocked and betrayed: is there a better sport than exy?

Aaron and Allison: YEAH A REALLY GOOD CAR RACE

*

Allison: you’re - you’re like the spirit of Lucy Liu. In Charlie’s Angels. I watch it once a day. Renee:.....that’s sweet actually :) 

*

Neil: does a molotov cocktail

Matt: I tHoUgHt yOu wErE a PhArMaCiSt

Neil: Yes? That’s PHYSICS

Matt: no that’s ARSON NEIL

Alternative:

Kevin: breaks into the Pentagon virtually

Neil: breaks into the Pentagon physically

Matt, again: i thought you were a PHARMACIST!!!! Neil: Yes I am??? That’s irrelevant

*

A senseate sibling, escaping, grabbing a vehicle at random: someone knows how to drive that?

Allison, in stilettos : no, but I sure will soon

*

Just Allison driving Renee around to fight people

*

Everytime someone mocks a senseate sibling Neil or Nicky shows up to roast them. Sometimes they do it both at the same time. It’s apocalyptic. The sass. The drama. 

They can also bullshit their way out of any situation. Neil is such a smooth liar and Nicky is just ridiculous. The FBI agent charged to arrest them somehow ends up crying abt childhood trauma while hugging a teddy bear.

Neil, caught in the act of making a string of explosives by the FBI guy: uuuuuuh….Nicky?

Nicky, currently dealing with a white mom in retail: somehow convince the FBI to buy christmas lights

(Yes Nicky works in retail bc his family cut ties with him but he hopes to be an actor.ON BROADWAY)

(From retail to actor to cluster negotiator real quick)

A  fuckin moron to Allison: a hottie like you driving a bus? what is this, hooker on wheels?

Neil: please let me have this one

Allison: seats back and enjoys Neil roasting him

Nicky: brings the popcorn

Nicky, to the FBI guy: You can’t arrest me Daryl I’m your long lost little brother

The FBI guy, a white man: My name is not Daryl Neil: THAT’S WHAT THEY WANT YOU TO BELIEVE

The FBI guy, texting Neil (don’t ask): I guess I’m still in love with my ex

Nicky: aaaaaw we have to help this sweetheart

Neil: do you want me to burn his current boyfriend’s car, buddy?

(Nicky: DON’T REMIND HIM THAT HE’S SUPPOSED TO ARREST US)

*

A fuckin homophobe: ready to get your ass kicked, faggot?

Andrew: appears through Nicky

Nicky, smiling: fuck yeah, baby 

*

Andrew, between two bazooka shot, to Neil:  we’re nothing

*

Nicky, through Andrew, all cheery: Hi!!!! :D

(Aaron jumps like a scared cat)

*

Andrew: ready to kill ppl for mafia business

All the senseate siblings in the back minus Renee, eating popcorn and enjoying the show: Kick ass, Drew!

*

Andrew, on the hospital bed: has an emotional moment with Aaron

Aaron: sir or ma'am, idk who you are but it’s family only, I will ask you, as his doctor, to leave my brother’s body

*

Aaron: Andrew is2g if you’re making psychic love to that fuckin red hair rn i will-

*

Andrew each time a senseate is hurt: Aaron it’s for you

(Just Aaron doing med tutorials for a whole cluster while Andrew repeats it with a bored tone to everyone)

(Aaron, sighs: it is Neil again? Just let him bleed for a few minutes)

*

Neil, making bomb with kitchen stuff: If it means losing you then no

Andrew, falling in love: oh

*

Bad guy: You have no weapon, blondie!

Allison, with Renee and Dan behind her: Think again, sweetheart

*

They made a little “honorary cluster member” badge to Aaron (he does not cry STFU NEIL)

*

Dan and Neil both knows by heart the laws of different countries…..for very different reasons.

*

Luther: humiliates Nicky once again

Renee: calmly breaks his hand at dinner while smiling like an angel, all the while stopping Andrew from killing him with the other hand

*

Neil, a pharmacist: blowing shit up and arson

Aaron, a doctor, watching him: yk what hold my beer I know several ways to stop a man’s heart

*

The whole “You don’t know how to use a gun” “No, but you do” with andreil or matt and dan

*

Just Drew and Renee kicking some mafia asses together as buddies

(While Neil blows some shit up in the background and Allison/Nicky cheer)

*

Matt has the perfect ear too

Him and Kevin are the remote operation/communication team but one day all the fighters/criminals of the cluster are busy so they both start to fight as well and fuck they are good at it

Nicky: I expected this from Biceps Matt but Kevin??? You can land a kick like that???

Kevin, outraged: I WENT TO THE EXY OLYMPICS WHEN I WAS 16

*

Speaking of Kevin, they all call him “nerd” or “einstein”

Allison: so the nerd can fight uh

*

Aaron, counting down on his fingers: so you have F1 Pilot Superstar Allison Reynolds, former gold medalist and tech genius Kevin Day, a human diapason, a multilingual arsonist, World no.1 Taekwondo Champion Renee Walker, a cop, an actor…..what are you there for??

Andrew, literally a mafia king:....ice cream and crime?

*

Neil to Andrew, after the whole debacle with his father is out: You did know there were mafia out of Germany too, right?

Andrew: I can’t even have that for myself fuck this family

*

Dan, every time before each “mission”: okay guys I know we need to do it but I’d like to remind ALL of you *looks pointly at Neil and Andrew* it’s STILL illegal and morally dubious

Neil: …….like I said to Nicky, irrelevant *without missing a beat blows up the entire building and puts on stolen Gucci shades*

Alternative:

Neil: ok saint theresa why were you the one to suggest we explode Riko’s brain off then

Dan: ...don’t turn the conversation around me it’s about you

*

Allison “guess we’re detourning a place next” Reynolds and Kevin “It’s not that hard to pilot” Day

(Kevin: But why are you on a plane to Russia? I thought you were in India last time?

Neil:....don’t ask)

*

Aaron to Andrew, where they are trapped and betrayed: your boyfriend wouldn’t happen to know how to poison a whole room with gaz?

Neil: I was born for this moment

(Andrew: just bc you’re my brother doesn’t mean you have the right to dirty talk my boyfriend)

*

Andrew: be gay, do crime and eat ice cream

Nicky: AND BLOW NEIL’S D-

*

(before they know abt Neil’s past, when Andrew is angsty bc he caught feelings)

Andrew: You  shouldn’t get close to me, it’s dangerous, i’m mafia

Neil: oh haven’t you heard-

*

Jeremy, bouncing out of nowhere: Hey Kev ! Love how you BI-nary code ahah have you heard of the ARCHIPELAGO 

*

Neil, sipping tea: so my father is the Butcher

Matt:  okokokok coolcoolcoolcool yk what arson doesn’t sound like a bad idea after all

*

(this one is not funny sorry) but Neil taking over each time someone is hurt bc he is used to deal with it

“Give the pain to me”

*

Andrew and Aaron like to fuck around a lot with the whole sensate stuff (since only one of them is a sensate)

Bad guy: only one of you is a sensate, which one is it?

Twinyard, in a perfect and flat tone: try to guess

A bad guy is spying on Andrew and waiting to kill him in Germany, via a cam, thinking he’s safe BUT SUPRISE MOTHERFUCKER it was aaron dressed as Andrew in a mafia meeting and now you have to deal with a 5 feet tall mafia boy

*

For real tho they are a little protective of the normal doctor who heal them every time (yes even Neil but don’t tell him) so you bet something like that happens one day:

Aaron: comes home from work angry

Andrew, cleaning up blood or counting money: whassup shithead?

Aaron: There’s this older doctor he’s great and all but he’s a fuckin asshole to me he belittles me everyday bc i’m young and we lost a patient today bc he rathers humiliate me than let me save him 

Andrew, a dangerous glint in his eyes and a whole cluster behind him: oh?

Kevin, opens his computer and digs up dirt on him: give me a sec

Allison: I can roll over him with my truck

Neil: there is so many ways to mix two meds and kills him ON ACCIDENT

Dan: let’s see how he deals in prison

Nicky: oh this is going to be fun

Kevin, reciting facts like he’s reading a grocery list: so yeah he smuggles meds from the hospital so local drug dealers, illegally sells meds for himself on the black market, does tax evasion, is friend with a local senator and both of them are involved with minors….i have already several reservation at X hotel btw and cases of work harassment on nurses and interns, threats to others older doctors in serve, and OH. OH. We have a spanking kink on our hands too.

Every members of the cluster, turning to Nicky and Neil:....go wild

Nicky, giggling: not that’s it’s a shame when it’s consensual but not here so - let’s start with the spanking :D

Neil: Can I make him cry

No violence is used but the doctor is found on the floor drowning in his own tears after a few minutes and after an hour he’s resigned and leaving the country

Andrew was dressed as Aaron for that (that being: smuggling Neil and Nicky into the hospital to meet the doctor through him)  and sends him a selfie of a 5 feet surgeon and the man crying on the floor 

It’s their best memory as a family (Aaron hates Neil a little less after that)

Neil to Nicky: why did you stop me from pushing towards suicide??? He’s gonna do that in another country

(Kevin: no if I can help it)

Nicky: bc we don’t do that to people!

Neil, Andrew, Aaron, Allison:...........right

Neil: killing even indirectly is no good but destroying their life and humiliating them publically is good?

Nicky: YES!

Matt and Dan: WAIT NO

(Allison: don’t brother Neil you’ll just hurt your head)

(Neil, close to tears: but...but...but arson?? Andrew, with knives out: alright fuckers who broke his heart?)

*

Matt and Dan bc they’re fuckin weak to Neil: ITS OK BUDDY ARSON IS GOOD

*

I have to end on this note:

Storyline wise, Neil would have make the perfect Wolfgang too….if Wolfgang was a twink.

1. Why did you choose your url? i’m female joey belladonna. it’s also one of the rules of the internet, rule 63: “to every male character or man, there is a female counterpart, and vice versa.”

2. Any side blogs? if you have them, name them and why you have them. an art blog (badgalnirvhannah) and two fic blogs (grunge and metal fanfics; feverinfeveroutfic)—i’ve had to close a couple from the lack of attention and also because i did the smart thing and put my writings on the archive.

3. How long have you been on tumblr? long time lurker, but i started in real late 2014. took a long as hell hiatus in october 2016–i mean it was long, too, it lasted almost two years. i often think of doing it again.

4. Do you have a queue tag? yes! “promisqueueous”, a play on “promiscuous”. it’s a self-roast and a nod to my growing up in the loose 2000s.

5. Why did you start your blog in the first place? i wanted to share my art and be a part of something. if my lengthy breaks are indicative of anything, it’s that it doesn’t seem to be working and i’ve really been wondering if it’s even worth it on here anymore. i’m even actually genuinely surprised by the fact people follow me and i can’t picture anyone even wanting my art or putting it in their house or whatever. yeah, tumblr, the biggest site that supposedly embraces artists, writers, and creators, has never validated an artist, a writer, and a creator.

6. Why did you choose your icon/pfp? sweet alex. that man is love—that drawing is also like medusa’s head on athena’s shield because every time he pops up, everyone is quick to jump on me, and he’s a controversial guy to boot.

7. Why did you choose your header? it’s the bay area strikes back! testament, exodus, and death angel! their last gig before everything went to hell (they were over in brussels) and they all had to bounce like a few hours after—and alex and eric were freaking out because chuck and gary holt both tested positive for the virus and flights were getting canceled left and right. i have it up as a reminder that life is precious and every moment counts.

8. What’s your post with the most notes? 🤷🏻‍♀️

9. How many mutuals do you have? some

10. How many followers do you have? nunya bidness

11. How many people do you follow? 467, but i would say half are actually active, though. this place feels like a ghost town when i come on.

12. Have you ever made a shitpost? I wouldn’t even know how to make a shitpost. it’s like everyone is speaking some language that i’m supposed to know but i don’t. it’s isolating and frustrating.

13. How often do you use tumblr each day? not a lot. never have been a big user, either—there are too many other things to do.

14. Did you ever have a fight/argument with another blog once? who won? if you’ve been following me since last summer, you would know. i have no idea who won, either.

15. How do u feel about “u need to reblog this” posts? dumbest thing ever. don’t tell me what to do.

16. Do you like tag games? i do! no one ever tags me, though. i actually have to hunt down games like this in order to do them. it’s kind of sad, actually.

17. Do you like ask games? i’ve only done like 2 but i’m traumatized about the ask box after last summer. can’t imagine doing it again.

18. Which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous? tumblr famous just sounds lame. more lame than lame.

19. Do you have a crush on a mutual? no, and i can’t imagine someone having a crush on me, either. i never could. i don’t feel wanted by anyone.

😘

OKAY SO I see this gem: “lilias is tried in cidonia’s equivalent of the hague for her crimes,” for example," in your intro post And I'm just...I ask for a shitpost about this

aaaaaa sorry for taking so long to finish this! my brain decided to commit die for almost a straight week and i have no idea why

lmao quick disclaimer but i am not completely up to date with the lore from the ending portion of episode 2 so this might be a bunch of cursed speculation

still hopefully i'll be able to make something worthwhile lol

seven years.

seven years of evading the authorities.

lilias had severed almost any connection she had to her previous life and yet, she had failed.

how the hell did the authorities even get to her? she thought she did a pretty good job evading their meddling. did someone tattle on her in exchange for a plea deal or something? how rude. if she still could, she'd arrange for that person to be, shall we say, sent out for a nice vacation in a warm, toasty place.

but, she couldn't, and now she was being dragged into confinement and charged with a myriad violations of what's basically cidonia's geneva convention.

oh, come on, what she did wasn't that bad. calm down. lilias shook her head in disapproval as her crimes were read out to her. did the people affected even matter that much? who cared? they were obstacles. she needed to clear them up to reach her goal. it was just a means to an end.

she sat in her cell, idly wondering what would become of her. would she get a deal to lessen her punishment, or would she be left to rot for the rest of her days if she didn't figure something out here?

there was another way this could end, but, well, lilias didn't think dwelling on it would be necessary. not at this point. she supposed she'd figure things out if it got to that point.

she'd find a way. she always found a way, no matter the cost.

eventually, the day of her trial began, and she was presented in front of the court.

dear god, this would be a shitshow.

the trial was a media frenzy, given a wholeass citylord was finally being brought to justice for her laundry list of misdeeds.

apparently these sorts of trials could last for literal years

dear god

lilias would be so old, she'd have one foot in the grave by the time this was over

well, maybe not that old, but you get what i'm saying

god, they went over everything from everywhere

seriously, she didn't even remember doing some of this stuff! besides, some types of people did deserve a little torture for their disobedience.

just as a treat

eventually, the trial finally fucking ended, and lilias got her ass sentenced to life in prison

well then

this gave her time. lots of time to create an escape plan and execute it

would she be allowed visitors? surely some people were still on her side, right? surely there were some lilias simps and apologists left in cidonia.

maybe she could be like one of those serial killers who were inexplicably worshiped in the dark recesses of social media websites?

she thought she had charisma and still was fairly attractive, all things considered. surely someone liked her and her kim possible titties.

these ideas would not come to fruition, though, and lilias was forced to serve her sentence until the day she died. because that's literally what a life sentence entails.

actually she probably would be executed but ehhhhhh

informal prison execution? hmmmm

but yeah she got vibe checked lmao and she deserved it

look i don't remember like anything about lilias but i feel like she'd commit some crimes against humanity too

those are kinda like war crimes but can be committed in both peace and war times??? idk man

i think you can get tried for both in the hague maybe??? possibly. i don't know the logistics of this, given that i have not committed either type of crime

anyway haha lilias got yeeted into jail

point and laugh everyone

uhhhh

hopefully you enjoyed it??? i'm not sure how i could effectively shitpost about this without doubt actual research on how these trials are conducted, but hopefully this suffices

lmao not me not being able to properly shitpost about something that was my own idea

anyway, as usual, leave your metaphorical yelp review in a reply or reblog if you wish

catch up pt.1

quick rundown of what’s been going on with me

ramo is the first guy that i’ve consistently and personally interacted with since about 2018 and definitely the first guy who actually around my age that i’ve formed a relatively close bond with. i think it’s for this reason that i’m so attached to him. he frequently described himself as an incel (ironically tho) and i think his last actually non-paid-for sexual relationship was back in 2017. so i stupidly assumed that i was the only girl in his life that he was actually close with and this delusion i think in many ways also is what build the foundation behind the inexplicable quasi-infatuation that i have now.

 on 06th june he told me about some girl that was part of his i***c*** discord which i already knew he was a part of since ages ago. i asked about her and he said she was from lithuania and that he was pissed off because some other guy was orbiting her which immediately set off alarm bells to me since there’s legit no reason to get pissy that someone else is orbiting a girl unless you like her yourself. he also said some shit to me which i think was unintentionally (or maybe intentionally?) hurtful, about how he could easily afford my prices and that i sell myself way below the market rate (both true but still). i think it’s both these things happening at the same time which particularly stung: ramo orbiting some e-girl who is involved in the same interests and hobbies to a greater extent than i am and also the emphasis that i’m a whore (and a cheap one at that) who no one would ever really consider as a serious dating prospect if they knew anything about my history.

i told him shortly after than i didn’t want to see him for a month or so, making up the excuse that it was because i was gonna be too busy. this is partially true cus i did initially have the plan to work every single day until the date of my breast augmentation/lift surgery which would be 25th june, earning like £700 a day in profit if i worked very hard. that didn’t quite come to fruition because there was some guy who booked with me that left a negative review on UKP which led to a fussilade of criticism from various users about me being a power-tripping time waster who frequently ghosted clients. this is kinda true except the power-tripping part; my timewasting is a direct result of substance abuse problems which is a direct result of whoring myself out to men that i often find unattractive. all in the preceding week (i met ramo on a sunday and this shit happened the following week).

two separate people passive aggressively threatened to send me another negative review over text, i have to provide a discounted rate to two of my regulars due to consistantly missing bookings, someone left me a negative review under my AW profile (which they did through sending a booking request that i didn’t confirm) saying that my service had declined massively over the last few months and that it was like ‘fucking a zombie’ and the final night of working on thursday (10/06), i saw this guy who has followed me under various aliases i’ve had in the past (jade/sana/etc.) and that i last meant at kingston premier inn in like june 2019. would have been a nice blast from the past in some respect but i made a stupid retarded decision to do coke with him - i then sniffed poppers which was retarded as well because poppers are a stimulant and speeds the heart up even further which i didn’t really know at the time. i then got super paranoid that i was gonna have a heart attack and kept telling the client in question to ensure that he call an ambulance if i collapsed, which i’m sure really got him in the mood. his name was james and i stupidly told him my real name. he couldn’t come and i felt like shit because i knew he didn’t enjoy himself - he told me in his mind that he had kind of ‘built’ the meeting up and i suppose it must have fallen massively short of his expectations. it is what it is.

i couldn’t sleep really at all due to the coke. i had several meetings arranged for the next day on friday with regulars all of which i cancelled. i just couldn’t continue on with the same routine of waking up in the morning feeling disgusting because i keep eating junk food delivery, doing an enema, getting drunk and just getting fucked until bedtime even though it was really good money.

i fucked around and went to chinatown on saturday evening and was feeling really happy and relieved about not having to work. i’ve figured that i can just make money after my surgeries and start again under a new profile where i don’t have any negative reviews attached to it and maybe rent out an actual apartment on a monthly basis, since it’d be cheaper than air BnB and i can set things up the way i want. i ate sweet and sour fish and egg fried rice, it was taste (ramo always says that lol).

idk what compelled me to do it but on 14th june, i looked through ramo’s likes on twitter. i think it was because i recalled seeing an obvious girl account in his likes previously - this is something i didn’t really think about at all previously but with the new information he had told me the sunday before, i ended up browsing her account which kind of led to a personal crisis. i found out fairly quickly that this girl was the same one he had referred to on discord (m** on discord, j**** on twitter) simply because there were screencaps on her media referring to the same discord and she was definitely from lithuania. i always assumed that women in these circles were lame and bland tradthots who lacked any kind of constitution beyond mindless pandering to irony poisoned scrotes and genuinely retarded wignats but i was suprised at how immediately endearing this girl appeared even to me, through the internet and as someone i have every reason to feel petty resentment towards.

her shitposts were funny and while she is edgy, she has an underlying sweet and kind disposition. her art is shit but cool in its own scrambled way. she’s also apparently only 16 so it’s understandable - i was a lot more cringe at her age and just as shit at art.

the feeling of inadequacy was overwhelming since in addition to being an actual whore, i’m super cringe, lame and normie compared to her. it made completely sense that ramo would orbit a girl like this and i’ve since completely re-evaluated my position and meaning in his life. it’s a good thing that my cope of feelings of intense inadequacy is to launch myself into a phase of hyper-productivity - i kept practicing drawing (apeing her in a way ig since i recently had kind of given up on drawing), fasting, reading, etc. to try and overcome how worthless and self-loathing i felt at being the unwitting basis of comparison to a young girl who was better than me in every conceivable manner. i even listened to msg 3.

i was in so much pain over this that i couldn’t listen to songs which reminded me of ramo (any i****c*** but specifically drug approved and also temptation) and when i did, i just felt anger at my position and a weird resentment towards him. worth mentioning than ramo had sent me a weird bootycall kind of text sometime before then which came across as really crash, so that made me feel even more devalued. 

this is already super long so i’m gonna follow up with a pt. 2 later or maybe edit.

Drunj!Der Yells About Outlander

Thoughts on Ep. 508

I mean, shame on me for allowing myself to get my hopes up that the show might have turned a corner last week. I should know better by now.

At least Young Ian’s back. And Marsali had a nice moment. And that’s about all I have to say about this episode that’s positive. I swear to fuck, this show hates Claire as much as the author of the books does. Where the fuck is the lead protagonist, show? Can she come back? Can she get a story line of her own that’s more than just a random scene every few episodes, please? And can Bree please be given something to fucking do that doesn’t involve Roger, Jemmy or rape? Does Fergus still even live on the Ridge?

But yeah, I guess let’s just all watch the episode twice so our dumb lady!brains can understand that Matt’s stupid silent movie gimmick was actually ~ArT~ and not, you know, a stupidly bad creative choice. Seriously, fuck that guy.

I can’t tell you how much idgaf about watching Roger teach. Also, Bree’s like his students’ age since she was in college too. So really all this bit is doing is to make me skeeved out about their age difference.

“Can you tell me why anyone would go to the trouble of burying one?” he said, condescendingly, like the doucherocket he is. Do not disrespect Young Ian like that, asshat.

“People live and die by their words.” *gestures to the beautiful shitposts on this hellsite* sure jan dot gif.

I already want to fastforward.

Would 100% rather sit through a lecture on suspension bridges than watch silent movies, tbh.

Hate the title card. Hate this whole gimmick.

Hate.

HAAAAATE.

Roger got hanged. Roger was dumb, Buck was an abusive and toxic fuckwad. But still, Roger got hanged and this is how we find out he’s alive and how he was saved?

It should be this big emotional moment. It should make me feel a thing in spite of myself. But nope! Gotta do this fucking silent movie thing. Which is hilariously terrible. And I laughed at it the whole time. In a mean and judgey fashion. What a craptastic creative choice. Whoever’s idea that was is a fucking idiot. *stares at a certain pompous af showrunner*

Ok but for real though, does LJG just like live in North Carolina now? Why is he always around, besides, you know, so we don’t forget he’s a character who exists.

For real though, he lives in Virginia and gets more screen time than fucking Fergus and Marsali who live fucking next door.

At least writing this recap is gonnna be quick and easy since they waste so much time re-showing the stupid silent movie footage.

Yes, I know, they’re trying to show Roger’s PTSD. Which involves flashbacks. And gradually turn it to color once he’s like come to terms with what happened and starts to move forward. But the execution is so bad that the whole arc is wasted because it’s just so poorly done.

Oh hey! A Claire and Bree scene! I love those. Except oh wait, it aggressively fails the Bechdel Test.

I JUST WANT THE FUCKING WOMEN ON THIS SHOW TO HAVE SOMETHING TO DO THAT’S COMPLETELY FUCKING SEPARATE FROM THE MEN. ARGH.

Jocasta singing at Murtz’s cairn is a reminder that everyone should check out MDK’s music.

And her wearing the necklace Murtz gave her makes the existence of show!Duncan even dumber. Like oh hey, new husband, don’t mind me, just mourning my dead boyfriend and wearing his jewelry. But it’s totally normal since my niece-in-law still wears her abusive ex-husband’s ring.

Sorry, show!Duncan, but a more pointless character was never included. Show!Duncan wins the prize for most BeCaUsE tHe BoOk dumbassery.

Repeatedly showing what’s basically a snuff film is...a choice.

LJG has no sense of personal space when it comes to the Frasers. And it’s fucking creepy.

Oh look, another scene where all Claire gets to do is comfort someone about a man.

*BANGS FIST ON TABLE* GIVE CLAIRE BEAUCHAMP THE STORY LINES SHE DESERVES.

Jemmy aged like 3 years in the 3 month time jump.

Ok, I totally get why Roger hadn’t spoken yet. But once he did, the seal was broken. Not talking after he yelled to stop Jemmy, even a little bit, is just a dick move. Not that he’d be magically better. But he like refuses to even take baby steps.

CAN WE PLEASE GET THROUGH AN EPISODE WITHOUT A MUSICAL INTERLUDE. I FUCKING HATE THE CLEMENTINE SONG.

GRANNIE CLAIRE AND GRANDA JAMIE ARE MY FAVE.

OMFG AN ARROW. THAT CLEARLY MEANS...YOUNG IANNNNN!!!!!

So glad he’s back. So fucking glad. Yes, it means one more character to dilute how much time we can spend with any given person, but it’s a character that I like so hopefully he takes away from some of the time given to ones I don’t like?

Aaand Roger can’t even bring himself to try to talk to the guy who gave himself up in his place. Fuck Roger.

Claire does a better job at first than Jamie at picking up the vibes Young Ian is putting off, but like, for two people who are supposed to be emotionally intelligence, neither of them do a good job at first of really *seeing* Ian.

John Bell is really good in this episode.

Omfg Marsali has tarot cards. She’s like leaning full on into being the white witch’s apprentice and I fucking love her so much.

Also, the Hanged Man card is representative of self-sacrifice and martyrdom rather than like being actually hanged as a punishment. But whatevs.

Ok I think the reason Jenny yelling at Jamie to snap out of it in S3 bugged me where this scene with Bree yelling at Roger doesn’t is because sibling dynamic is completely different than spouses where both of them have gone through something unimaginable.

That he can’t even say anything here. Or give her any kind of sign that he’s still in there is a dick move. He *can* speak. He knows that now. So does everyone else. He’s actively choosing not to. Even to say that he just needs more time to work through his shit. No one’s asking him to be a chatterbox and totally back to normal.

Young Ian just sitting there while everyone else does grace is literally me at every family holiday.

Oh look, a wild Fergus appeared!

Ok, I never got the surveying thing. Wouldn’t the land already be registered? Since they were given the paperwork and shit for it from the governor? I know there was some bit about it in the book about keeping it after the Revolution but like, who the fuck else are they registering it with that would make a difference? The gov’t is still the English gov’t?

“But there are things you keep hidden from others. You and Claire both.” Ok, can he please be talking about time travel? I mean, I know he’s talking about his wife and their miscarriages, but I just want someone else to know about time travel already please and thank you.

HOW THE FUCK IS MARSALI STILL PREGNANT?! SHE’S BEEN PREGNANT FOR LIKE A FUCKTON OF TIME.

Fuck yeah not-Catholic-anymore-Ian. No grace, talking about the creator in a way that isn’t explicitly the christian god. Good job, kid.

My parents called me to say happy easter and I had to be like, uh, you remember that I don’t celebrate that, right?

Happy Zombie!Jeebus Appreciation Day to all the still christian people. And happy chance to have fun with burner zoom accounts named Elijiah to the jewish folks.

Jokes aside, the scene with Young Ian and Marsali was really nice and Marsali remains a fucking saint. It’s nice that Young Ian has someone who like actually gets what it’s like to find a home in a group of strangers.

Oh Claire, think more highly of your assistant. Also, what a clunky fucking way to be like oh hey, one of the emo!bros is gonna try to off themselves.

Ok but with the paper airplane now too, can we please show Young Ian finding out about time travel? Please?

Ok, but Claire automatically jumping to Roger wanting to off himself with her herbs... It’s making me judge both of them a little that neither picked up on just how clearly Young Ian was suffering. Like come the fuck on, y’all. It wasn’t subtle.

Also, can we please have more Adso?

SOMEONE GIVE YOUNG IAN A HUG! NO, NOT YOU, ROGER! SOMEONE GOOD!

Yada yada yes they both have been through something shitty and call me a biased asshole, but I can’t bring myself to feel anything about Roger and I feel all the things about Young Ian.

So Roger won’t talk when his wife begs, but he’ll talk when someone calls him on his bullshit. Cool. Cool cool cool. Nice dude.

NO ONE WAS ASKING FOR THE OLD ROGER, YOU TWATWAFFLE. THEY WERE ASKING FOR *A* ROGER. INSTEAD OF A ZOMBIE.

Again, there’s more to that tarot card than a literal hanged man, but whatever, show.

Oh thank fuck the episode is finally over. Expectations are back down in the gutter for the rest of the season. Please pleasantly surprise me, show, but I will not make the mistake again of thinking you’re actually gonna be consistently good again.