Chapters: 5/6
Fandom: Polizeiruf 110
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Vincent Ross & Karl Rogov
Characters: Vincent Ross, Karl Rogov
Additional Tags: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Hurt/Comfort, Freundschaft, Angst, Post Der Gott des Bankrotts, Maybe a tiny little bit of pre-slash if you squint
Summary:
Vincent macht einen Fehler. Und zieht Karl mit hinein. Zum Glück.
oh no! the song that came on my playlist did not meet the exact mood and tone for what i was writing! time to re-create the city of new york inside of minecraft for an hour instead of doing something productive! 🤣🤣🤣
Dick gets his drink mixed up with another persons in the library while visiting Barbara.
He was drinking some kale smoothie thing, for health and stuff, and he set it down to grab a book from the shelf. There was another guy next to him, who also had a smoothie in the same kind of shake-n-go bottle.
They swapped by accident.
Dick checked out his book, said goodbye to Barbara, and took a sip of his smoothie.
That's the last thing he remembers.
He wakes up two days later pinned down by a practically feral Jason, who's eyes are glowing a sickly Lazarus green, with Bruce, Tim, Cass, and Duke all showing signs of losing a fight. He's sore everywhere, and Damian is nowhere to be seen.
"Uh...." his voice cracks, and he's suddenly aware of how fucking painful his throat is. "Hi? What's going on?"
"...Is it really you, Dickwing? I swear to God if it isn't and this is another-"
"Jay I really don't know what's going on, man."
Jason doesn't believe him. Dick is cuffed with anti-meta cuffs and escorted to the cave, where Bruce demands test after test and Dick tells them the last thing he remembers.
Apparently, after taking that sip, his eyes had turned to Lazarus green, and he had beelined for the mansion. Along the way there, he had run into the Riddler.
He had broken most of the Riddler's bones.
That was when everyone had been called in to subdue Dick, who for some strange reason kept gunning for Damian. Hence, Damian was upstairs and not allowed down until they were sure Dick was okay again.
It's concluded that Dick drank some alternate form of Lazarus Water, lost his mind, proceeded to take everyone out with enhanced strength and speed except Jason, who had entered a Pit episode just to keep up, and worked through it two days after consumption.
But who the fuck transported a material as dangerous as modified Lazarus Water in a fucking shake-n-go bottle?
Danny, however, is a little sad that his ecto-shake was stolen by some rando at the library.
Tubbo: I swear to God, Chat - I promise you, if it's the last thing I do, I am going to break up Fit and Pac.
Mike passed the crown of #1 Hideduo hater to Tubbo, and Tubbo took that title very seriously.
[ Full Subtitle Transcript ↓ ]
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Pac: I have a date with Fit tomorrow! You know the news, Tubbo?
[ Tubbo's Homophobic Arc ]
Pac: I got a date with Fit tomorrow!
Tubbo: You're - no... You're kidding..
Pac: Yeah, for real! Look - Mike shaved my hair you know, and gave me a new outfit so I can be like, sharp for tomorrow. ...You guys like it? You like it, Sunny?
[Judgemental silence]
Tubbo: That's so cool man, what he hell. That's fckin' sick.
Pac: Yeah, thank you! I knew it, I knew you'd- Oh, thank you, Sunny! I knew you guys were gonna love it, you know? I knew it.
-
Tubbo: I swear to God- I swear to God- We need to add homophobia to the QSMP, I swear to God- I swear to God-
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Tubbo: Guys, I have to do everything in my power to break them up. What do you mean "no"?! This is awful, Sunny! This is awful!
Sunny: But why Pa?
Tubbo: THEY WERE NEVER MEANT TO GET TOGETHER! The stars told me so! They were never meant to actually get together!
Sunny: WHY PA
Tubbo: It's just wrong, Sunny! It's just wrong! I dunno how to explain it to you. It's just wrong!
Sunny: But it's loveeeee
Tubbo: ...If that's what you want to call it.
-
Tubbo: HOW IS THERE GONNA BE ENOUGH SPACE BETWEEN THEM FOR ME NOW, SUNNY?!
Sunny: You're telling me you've never been in love Pa?
Tubbo: Listen, it's just not right.
Sunny: But I like bodyguard Fit and driver Pac :(
Tubbo: I like them too! They're my best friends! But they can't be together.
Sunny: I think you are projecting
Tubbo: PROJECTING WHAT? HUH!?
Sunny: I will find you someone, Pa.
Tubbo: I DON'T WANT SOMEONE! I DON'T WANT SOMEONE IT ONLY SERVES TO DISAPPOINT ME AND GET MY HOPES UP AND LEAVE ME- LEAVE ME NOTHING BUT A SHELL! A SHELL OF A MAN!
-
Tubbo: Sunny - They're gonna hurt each other, Sunny- they're gonna hurt each other! And how will there be enough space between them for me now?
Sunny: Why would they do that if they care for each other?
Tubbo: People that care about each other, Sunny, hurt each other all the time! ALL THE TIME!
Sunny: But I care about you, and I don't hurt you.
Tubbo: No, that's different! That's different! The love that we have for each other is unconditional. Ok?
Sunny: Pa, I think you're just scared.
Tubbo: I'm not scared, I'm logical. All flags look red when you're wearing rose-tinted glasses.
-
Tubbo: [In response to Sunny talking about Aypierre's agreement to build her a statue] You already have a statue! [Sunny hits him] Ow!
Tubbo: What about the one Fit and Ramon made you for your birthday? [Tubbo has an idea] See? Do you think Fit would have time to do stuff like that if he's too- if he's too preoccupied with his little shag buddy? I don't think so! I don't think so!
Sunny: Wait.
Tubbo: See? You see what I'm saying? You see what I'm saying!
Sunny: You have a good point now
Tubbo: See? You under- yes, exactly! We HAVE to break them up! They can still be friends! Fck it, friends with benefits! But they cannot be together. We cannot let them.
Sunny: OK I'M IN
Tubbo: [Claps] I KNEW I COULD COUNT ON YOU! I knew I could count on you!
-
[Looking at fanart of Pac, Fit, and himself]
Tubbo: We- we have to split them up. We have to fckin' split them up. Oh, but I'm in this one! Oh, that's so-[Realizes it's him crying as a third-wheel] SEE?! SEE?! THEY KNEW! THEY KNEW! THEY FCKIN' KNEW! THEY FCKIN' KNEW!
-
Tubbo: [In a thick "red-blooded American" accent] Wha- I just don't understand why they have 'ta keep shoving it down our throats! Goddamnit! I JUST WISH IT WASN'T MY SMP! [He hits his desk and laughs]
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Dono: Streamer becomes homophobic 'cause he can't get any
Tubbo:
Tubbo: Sunny, I'm just gonna need to brb for a moment.
Tubbo: [Stands up from his desk, walks away, and screams]
-
Tubbo: I swear to God, Chat - I promise you - if it's the last thing I do, I am going to break up Fit and Pac.
In the diver au, do the sirens still come to see MC even when she isn't diving? Asking because I am terrified of SCUBA diving
Dw anon, as someone who actively enjoys scuba diving I am ALSO afraid of scuba diving. Y'all will never catch my ass below 10m
Sans: He's careful not to appear too often. He doesn't want her to start suspecting he does little else but wait for her to return to him. But yes, he does sometimes come to see her, even when she has no plans to dive - sometimes she just likes to go out on a boat with her buddies, maybe to be their surface guy, maybe to fish, maybe just to hang out. Either way Sans will be there. He circles the boat, maybe even pulls up alongside it... he's always all smiles, all whistles. He likes playing tug-of-war. He tolerates the presences of her friends; Sans knows that humans never dive alone, and if her friends start disapproving of him or seeing him as aggressive she might not get in the water.
Sometimes, he returns lost items to her when he comes to the boat. Fumbled kit from previous dives. Most of the time it's genuinely lost stuff, but occasionally, he actively steals things from under her or her dive partners noses only to 'return' them later and gain favour. Her friends like him, they're none the wiser that he sees them purely as obstacles in the way of his beloved. He only has eyes for her.
Red: Of course he does. Diving or no diving, she's cute and he wants attention. He'll show up and circle the boat like the shark he is, laughs and non-serious shouts of "your boyfriend's here" go up from her buddies; if she doesn't go greet him when he surfaces he literally rocks the boat, aggressively bumping the hull until she relents and comes to interact with him. He always has such a smug look on his face. If he's seen one of her friends getting a bit too chummy with her recently he might only show up to target some harassment their way - kicking up water at them, snapping or deliberately tangling their fishing lines, or even pulling the line himself so the whole rod eventually goes flying into the water. (Of course, they're only getting that back if she asks)
He likes that she's more confident on a boat. In the water, she's mindful of the fact that it's his territory, but if he's misbehaving on the surface within arm's reach she'll reach out and smack him on the skull. Those whacks are the highlights of his week.
Skull: She never sees him when she's not diving.
But... that doesn't mean he's not there.
In the day, he lurks below the surface, below the boat whose hull and engine hum he's memorised. He listens to the muffled sounds of her laughter.
... And at night, he can be far, far closer than she realises.