#they want accountability and growth
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Bestie Deficiency
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#a-qing#xue yang#xiao xingchen#Xue yang is cold because cold blooded creatures can't generate their own body heat#I am skipping over drawing the stories they tell due to the fact this arc is already really dragging#but I think they are very key in understanding the yi-city characters#Even if they are stories that really bring down the slumber party vibes A-Qing was hoping for.#I mentioned some of my thoughts in the tags of no. 76 but to continue on a bit more#I think xxc and xue yangs stories inversely mirror each other on the meaning of sacrifice and what it means to 'deserve' something#to xue yang he has only ever sacrificed - therefore he is in his right to 'deserve' what he wants. And he wants everything.#xxc leaves song lan thinking its the best course of action to atone but my god. No it wasn't. Poor communication crown actually goes to xxc#but it's what xxc he feels he deserves - continued sacrifice to atone. He wants to want nothing.#both are very stuck in the past in ways that are not actually accounting for their actions#It's easy to look at xue yang and go 'dang you need to get over your childhood trauma'#but that very much ignores that fact that we - real human beings - define so much by our childhood pains.#Growth is having to come to terms with it and trying to move past it...and not everyone is ready for that.#I have a lot of thoughts on that matter but I'll let it be for now.#Anyways. Amiguito appears to be one of those words whos meaning change depending on speaker and contextual factors#So as far as I can tell it slides around on the scale on romantic and platonic. Which works for this dynamic. I think.#Native Spanish speakers I am so sorry.
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wanted to try my hand at a train line map for the dsmp connecting important cities/places in the main area, based mostly on pre-existing paths, roads, and minecart tracks. most of these places dont coexist but ermm this is a future where stuff gets rebuilt in those places okay. (or theyre older routes that now lead to ruins. pick ur fav)
if you're more knowledgable about this or have ideas lmk i wanted to make the system as accurate/convenient as possible
alt vers under cut
version with no ferry route
version thats actually accurate to how maps work (north side up) (i know its extremely wonky we dont have to talk about it)
#dsmp#dream smp#do i tag this with anything else.#i actually rly like this . could srsly stare at it for hours (< is not immune to the train variant of autism)#umm this could also be a worldbuilding / dsmp citizens thing if u want#was thinking bout another version with more stops/branching paths if these cities were a lot bigger and had smaller neighbourhoods within#but like. that would take estimating how population and city growth would work and accounting for it. thats when i walked out the door#fanart#artsplice#txt#woo public transport wooooo
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I went from doing a highly specific job at an agency to having a much broader set of tasks at a small company and still every day experts will call me to offer their services for some of those tasks and I have to be like
#I don't want to speak to growth advisors and account managers anymore#I literally asked someone for advice and she had nothing#so then I offered my own solution and she went yeah you should do that#cool thanks
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they make me want to eat glass
#this scene is actually so funny to me#(well this part of this scene)#like for jane it's a little moment of growth and being accountable to lisbon which i love to see#(and bonus: he got to say marcus was wrong)#meanwhile lisbon got an actual confirmation that jane was jealous of pike#and then he follows that up with possibly one of the sexiest things he's ever said to her#and she immediately starts leaning into that energy and goes 'btw i basically withheld testimony from a federal prosecutor for you today'#they are the silliest people in the world#(a lot that's not funny haha funny i want to walk into the sea about this moment too but let me breathe deeply and try to act normal)#tm
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random gghbo appreciation post <3
(mostly zoya and monet)
i can honestly see so much happening w zoya bc i love her character and at the same time more happening developmentally w monet and luna. in fact i like how the gghbo fandom is a lot nicer to zoya than the og fandom was to jenny, who was also young and easily influenced by a world she never truly fit in.
and in gghbo no one is more blair vs serena but w monet and julian, ppl may prefer monet bc she owns it, but notice they are both deeply flawed ppl and many of their actions on both sides weren’t ok. but ppl might be more sympathetic toward monet bc her motives for these and personal reasons haven’t been revealed like julian’s, even if exposing zoya having a breakdown in a moment of psychological bullying was a new low, and monet seemed prideful about that. whereas julian wouldn’t really admit to herself that cheating w obie would hurt zoya, because she wanted to remind the positive sisterly influence in zoya’s life and have obie at the same time, despite never communicating this. monet seems like someone who hides her feelings well, whereas julian, despite her best efforts, is a sensitive open book when it comes to her heart.
i do think monet is deeply jealous of julian tho bc julian had the famous parent and monet had to work for her social media connections bc rich does not popular make???? even if monet is canonically the richest girl in school. i kinda see it like blair—monet has everything and it’s still not enough. blair wanted to go into fashion to please her mother. monet’s mother clearly cares for her deeply, even though monet has made it clear she doesn’t want to go into their scientific field as it doesn’t align w her career goals, which is likely what her parents are expecting of her.
monet wants to party, get to the top, and wreak havoc, and is unapologetic about that. i love that about her. she’s incredibly confident, however based on her actions, it feels like there’s something she’s trying to tell without saying. she’s what many extroverts at their fullest potential would be if they had her confidence, wealth, and motivation. it’s no wonder she wants julian to follow in her footsteps.
emotionally, i think she feels lost and unsatisfied and wants to revel in status and fame to cope with that. and that in some ways, she wishes she were julian, as julian pretty much got that fame handed to her and “throws it away” for zoya and obie, who monet seems incredibly disgruntled w bc they encourage julian not to care abt the motivations monet has imprinted onto her.
and lastly i like that zoya’s a studious bookworm, but is by no means perfect and loves toni morrison. i like that she loves her sister and does her best to fit into her world to make her happy even though she realizes later on that it’s just not worth it if julian can’t give her 50/50. zoya lott my angel <3333333
#she reminds me so much of rory gilmore but more held accountable for her actions???#also the way she was treated wasn’t fair monet and luna need their comeuppance in that respect#but also i want growth for monet and luna too they never pretend to be innocent i want to delve deeper#into them. like monet does not at all need immense trauma like blair had but it’s clear she’s very unsatisfied w life and the rich#environment of perfectionism and privilege allowing her to never have to try at what she truly wants#as for luna she’s got more of a soft side but popularity as well as preservation bc#like i really home to see more of luna/monet/zoya’s journeys in s2#gghbo#gossip girl reboot#zoya lott#monet de haan#luna la
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I'm having one of those days where social media is kinda just.... Not Fun
#sybil says#most of my posts are just me talking to myself and its like okay why am i here#this isnt directed at like individual users so much as its about how much trying to grow an account sucks?#like on one hand i dont want to be about audience growth but on the other no one new is seeing my stuff and my patreon is floundering
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Listen, I love that tik tok kid's are not letting ANYONE get away with shitty activity but it's a double edged sword.
On one hand, it's great they are trying to call out Markiplier who said the t slur(one edge) but the reality is that was 10 years ago, not used as an insult (he said it to describe someone cross dressing in a non-offensive manner. Like if someone was to call someone a faggot thinking it was just another word for gay that was inoffensive, not realizing it was a slur.), He's apologized and he's now active in supporting the LGBT community, especially the treavor project. But they are trying to call him out now, long after the incident and the apology and the moving on (other edge)
It's also funny watching them comparing it to willbur dreamsmp man when he said it in 2017 then immediately apologized just to turn around and call people retards. Like bro those aren't the same things lmao
#levi speaks#like call mark out for supporting PewDiePie afte the n word situation just to smite t series for biggest subscriber shit#dont bring up irrelevant shit#people had me all worried on something he said 9 years ago while drunk and not even with poor intentions#like im all for cancel culture and holding people accountable but at some point yall gotta move on lmao#hes clearly not the same person anymore and the fact is some of yall dont want growth and understanding from people#you just wanna be mad lol#like pewds has remained a stanch conservative conspiracy theory qanon bshitter after he half assrd apologized#mark apologized and actually changed to better support the community and understood where he fucked up#he also dosent support PewDiePie anymore#lile idk how to tell yall you cant compare the 2#tw f slur#tw faggot#tw r slur#tw retard
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how bad is it to quit your job when you have no money and nothing lined up?
#literally trying for a promotion but even though theure just 'interviewing'#theyre already fucking training kathy on it and everything fucking else#and havent interviewed me yet#and likely wont bother#and meanwhe i jave been BEGGING to be trained on more shirlt#but i get told that 'kathy's too busy to help on the speciall accounts so we need you to do them'#for MONTHS now#and at my review last week they had the audacity to tell me i havent#'demonstrated growth'#like how the FUCK do i 'grow' if you wont let me when i am literally BEGGING#theres two of those positions open and if i dont get one im literally just walking out#other people have told me i bust my ass harder than anyone else#but NOOOOO you dont GROWWWWWW!!!#meaning: they want me to keep doing the special accounts#and i fucking hate those!!!!
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personally, i dont see the fundamental difference between deleting your account and making a new one and deleting all your old posts, if we're talking about "running from ones past", then what are you tryna hide there, bud?
#mood#vent#the evidence of your past is gone regardless either way sooooooooooo#how is it so different and how do you keep convincing yourself you're morally superior?#i mean- this is me pretending I agree that that's true to play devils advocate a lil here#bc i know the only reason i deleted any account of mine was bc i just like fresh starts sometimes#and tbh i struggle to find a username i like and some website require me to delete & remake in order to change it#what-- is the problem that you struggle to hold on to me and keep track of me?#bc i promise as soon as i start posting my ocs people Will know who I am regardless of if I recreate-#at least yall and your kiwifarms stalking-ass followers will recognize it and immediately report back to their cult leader#so whats your issue here EXACTLY?#you're already documenting everything I do. so whats your issue?#i mean. is it bc other people wont 'know who I am' and what YOU think i'm like? even though other people- strangers-#already dont know who I am?#bc if thats your argument- I could say the same for you! how are people supposed to 'know who you are' when you delete all your posts?#there was only 1 time I actually deleted my acct out of fear of how ppl would treat me- and it was bc I was dating you!#you made me feel like I had to be Perfect. so quite frankly#blame yourself you bum#what can I say- ig i learned how to cover my tracks from you.#bc before you- I probably would have left it up even with all the bs happening at the time#and now I regret deleting it bc the only reason I did was to impress you with how Good I Am. 🤮#be honest- the reason you're upset is bc you cant use what was on that blog against me#even though what was on that blog PALES in comparison to the kind of shit you've done and posted.#ok ignoring you now and focusing on me again- there was so much art on that blog thats just lost forever and it makes me sad.#even any problematic things. I woulda wanted to keep it if only to keep an archive of my growth as an artist#plus there was a gif of hoody dancing to the thrill by wiz khalifa (i think that was the song I made the gif to) that i'll never get back 😔#i honestly have an issue with deleting my art in general- stuff that isnt problematic so dont start w me bitch- but- for some reason#I just used to get these urges to delete shit like out of shame. I think its bc of being trans and trying to stuff that down and feeling#ashamed that I even wanted to be the guy I wanted to be so I would just get rid of it all and .-.#theres a lil chunk of my comic art that's just gone forever and i wish ik everything I drew. at least I remember one of the ocs i deleted
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i've been thinking about beyond ascension again, since i've been rereading. like most of the other things i posted more than a year ago, thinking about it is incredibly embarrassing. but objectively i know i'm happy with it. posting things just has a way of making them seem cringe. anyway i still find it funny that i watched this terrible show, became irremediably gripped by these terrible villains, wrote this entire thing, and completely totally forgot temutai existed. sorry. that guy can just stay unredeemed.
#tong fo being a bartender is also#a set in stone headcanon of mine#the kind with no canon reference but that you simply know by divine vision to be true#and it was really important to me that at the end of the story he leave the valley of peace and not return#because that is not po's responsibility#and po deserves a space to heal and not have to be reminded anymore of these things#i have a lot of thoughts about this fic it's one of the longest things i've ever written in one go#which isn't much compared to other authors but for me it was a big thing#and i think it's cute how similar some of it ended up being to the fourth movie#which is probably a reason why i liked it so much i was like#yes yes yes yes this is it for me#OH making this post just reminded me of ANOTHER extremely dark fic i wrote about a cartoon panda#this one unpublished but one of my favorite things i'd ever written#braces episode from we bare bears you will forever be famous and hysterically inspiring to me#the thought of other people seeing this makes me cringe horribly but i'm trying to build immunity#fun fact for the fun fact lovers my whole ao3 account was me trying to build immunity#that's why the first few fics were once a year evenly i was doing my best to rid myself of shame and it NEVER worked i was literally#equally as embarrassed and terrified for months afterward every single time#but we stay silly and continue gently pushing our boundaries for self growth opportunities#now i think i just write certain things with posting in mind which makes it easier than feeling like i'm exposing things#that weren't supposed to be seen#that's all thank you for listening to random thoughts from sunny at four in the morning#🌃#i would give this the fandom tag but i don't want random people to witness me
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Green Flags in Communication 💚💬
"I want to know when I hurt your feelings."
This shows they are willing to understand and acknowledge the impact of their actions.
"I don't want you to feel alone in this."
This shows empathy and indicates that the person is supportive and does not want the person to deal with issues alone.
"I've been struggling with ___”
This demonstrates vulnerability and trust, as the person is open about their struggles.
"How have you been feeling about ___? I know it's been on your mind a lot."
This shows concern for the other person's issues or worries, showing that they are listening and care about what's important to the other person.
"I feel __ when you __; are you open to trying __ next time?"
This is an example of constructive communication.
"What do you need from me when this happens with your family?"
This shows awareness and sensitivity to the persons family dynamics and a willingness to provide support.
"I appreciate when you ___.”
Expressing appreciation is vital for positive reinforcement and acknowledging the efforts and qualities of the other person.
"I didn't handle that well."
This is a sign of self-awareness and accountability, recognizing one's own mistakes and being open to learning and growth.
"I'm sorry, I was wrong to say that. I'll try to be more mindful in the future."
Shows you are able to apologize genuinely and a commitment to improving behavior.
"Tell me more about that; I'm really interested in hearing your perspective."
Indicates a genuine interest in the other person's thoughts and feelings.
"I noticed you seemed a bit off today. Is everything okay?"
It shows you are attentive to the other person's emotional state and a readiness to provide support.
"I'm here for you, no matter what you need."
Offers unconditional support, creating a sense of security in the relationship.
"I love how passionate you are about your hobbies. It's inspiring to see."
Expresses admiration for the other person's interests.
"Let's work on a solution together. What do you think would be fair?"
Focusing on collaboration rather than conflict.
"I trust your judgment on this."
Trust and respect for the other person's decision-making abilities.
"Your happiness is important to me. Let's make sure you're taking time for yourself."
Prioritizes the other person's happiness and emphasizes the importance of self care.
"It's okay to feel that way. Do you want to talk about it more?"
Validates the other person's feelings.
"I appreciate how you handled that situation. You're really good at ___."
Praises specific strengths or skills, boosting the other person's self-esteem.
"I know we disagree, but I respect your point of view."
Acknowledges differences in opinion while still maintaining respect and understanding.
#communication#personal improvement#personal growth#personal development#self help#self awareness#self reflection#self improvement#healthy relationships#relationship advice#relationships#green flags#emotional intelligence#healthy relationship#health and wellness#mental wellness#mental health#level up journey#glow up tips#glow up#positive mindset#growth mindset
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23 things I learned in 2023:
Breaking promises to yourself is essentially telling yourself you’re not worthy of commitment or effort.
Listen to people when they tell you who they are.
People put their best foot forward when they first meet you. If they’re already being shitty, it’s likely only going downhill from here.
Self-care isn’t always indulging instant gratification and not doing hard things. I was actually at my most fulfilled when I did hard things DESPITE not feeling like it.
If you’re clinging to other people for fulfillment or validation, you probably don’t like yourself very much.
It’s never the end of the world like we think it is.
If someone wants to walk out of your life, let them. Never be in the business of changing people, even when it comes to changing how they think about you.
Brutally honest communication is everything, but that can also coincide with tactful kindness. Neither is mutually exclusive.
Having a routine makes a massive difference.
Comparison is pointless. No one else has been dealt the same cards you’ve been dealt.
Envy is a waste of time. Instead of being envious of other people, view them as proof of concept.
Self-accountability is important. We are fallible and it’s okay to make mistakes; we just need to own up to them.
Every failure is an opportunity for growth.
Every severed friendship, failed opportunity, lost connection etc etc leaves space for better things to replace it.
We are not tethered to people’s image of us. We are free to change ourselves whenever we please.
It’s not other people’s way, but it’s my way—and that’s all that matters.
Someone denying you love does not erase you.
Piggybacking off the last point—someone not acknowledging the virtues you have doesn’t mean that you don’t have those virtues.
All that really matters are the opinions of the handful of people who truly love you, as well as your opinion of yourself.
Waiting at least 15 minutes before reacting to something. Never trust yourself during the moments when something just hits (learned this the hard way).
Situations are complex and almost never a one size fits all. Asking for advice is okay, but take it with a grain of salt/ultimately follow your own judgment.
Social media isn’t the devil, but scrolling endlessly is. Make an intentional effort to supplant screen time with books and hobbies and friends and tangible, real life things.
We all die one day. None of this is that deep and none of this really matters. Stop taking things so seriously and just enjoy the process 🤍
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Sometimes it’s easy to forget how overwhelmed you have been before. How it felt crushing and how it felt like you couldn’t manage it. Sometimes you forget, in the moment of current issues, how much more you’ve had to deal with, or how deeper you’ve felt despair. And maybe this is the lowest point. But probably not. And either it will be, and there is a future you who will look back in fondness and pride, or you will look back with those feelings for a younger, smaller you, who survived worse and helped you be better.
I just think sometimes it’s powerful to recognise how the emotional experience shapes us, and how even hardship can be power. Growth comes with pain. But don’t sit in it. Remember it, and remember that it too shall pass, and you too shall grow.
#listen#it’s been a while since I’ve been emo on here#it’s been a while since I’ve been present on here beyond an odd like or reblog#but I have deep affection for this account#and the journey it has seen me through#I often go through my personal tag and look at the growth#and I just wanted to share#personal
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WAYS U CAN PLEASE SATURN ACCORDING TO UR SATURN PLACEMENT ♄
1H/ARIES SATURN: RESPECT URSELF. DO NOT ALTER UR BOUNDARIES TO BE LIKED. SELF IMPROVEMENT. PUT EFFORT INTO UR BODY/APPEARANCE. WORKOUT / BE ACTIVE. HEALTHY COMPETITION. PRACTICE OFTEN. BE CONFIDENT BUT NOT ABOVE OTHERS. SLOW DOWN. SELF GROWTH. DELIBERATE ACTIONS.
2H/TAURUS SATURN: DEVELOP STRONG VALUES. DO NOT UNDERMINE URSELF. QUALITY OVER QUANTITY. INTENTIONAL SPENDING. HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP WITH FOOD. TRY NOT TO OVERINDULGE ; TRY NOT TO WASTE. STOP SELF SABOTAGING. NO SELF DEPRECATING. APPRECIATE WHAT U HAVE. EXPRESS GRATITUDE. DONATE WHAT U CAN.
3H/GEMINI SATURN: THINK BEFORE U SPEAK ; SPEAK LESS THAN U DESIRE. STOP OVERSHARING. FOCUS ON UR CRAFT ; GET RID OF THE DISTRACTIONS. POWER IN THE TONGUE. PERSONAL MOTTOS. STAND FOR WHAT IS MORAL ; BE WELL INFORMED. HAVE HARD CONVOS WHEN NECESSARY. BE A SUPPORTIVE FRIEND. STOP COMPLAINING. FIND SOLUTIONS. ADAPT & OVERCOME.
4H/CANCER SATURN: CREATE BOUNDARIES & STICK TO THEM. BE OF SERVICE TO OTHERS WITHOUT SELF SACRIFICE. DO NOT BE OVERLY SELFISH. EXPRESS UR NEEDS. TAKE CARE OF UR MENTAL HEALTH. EMOTIONAL REGULATION. SELF CARE. BE SELECTIVE OF UR INNER CIRCLE. POUR INTO UR LOVED ONES. TREAT OTHERS WITH KINDNESS. KEEP UR LIVING SPACE CLEAN.
5H/LEO SATURN: LET GO OF SELF DOUBT. BRING UR VISION TO LIFE. MASTER UR CRAFT. BELIEVE IN URSELF & WORK TOWARDS UR GOALS. GET RID OF UR NEED FOR OUTSIDE APPROVAL. LOOK OUT FOR THE CHILDREN ; BE THE PERSON U NEEDED GROWING UP. WORK HARD, PLAY HARD. DELAYED GRATIFICATION.
6H/VIRGO SATURN: FOLLOW A ROUTINE. HEALTHY HABITS. STRUCTURE. KEEP UR SPACES ORGANIZED ; DE-CLUTTER. BE A FRIEND TO ANIMALS. TAKE GOOD CARE OF UR PET/S. PUT IN THE WORK EVERY DAY. OFFER A HELPING HAND. HONOR UR OWN TIME & ENERGY ; DO NOT ENGAGE IN ONE-SIDED RELATIONS.
7H/LIBRA SATURN: MAKE UR OWN DECISIONS. TAKE ACCOUNTABILITY. CRACK DOWN ON CO-DEPENDENCY ; AVOID SELF ISOLATION. LONGTERM RELATIONS. BE THE BIGGER PERSON. FORGIVE BUT DON’T FORGET. APPLY LESSONS FROM THE PAST. TREAD LIGHTLY. RESPECT THOSE WHO CAME BEFORE YOU. FORM LASTING ALLIANCES.
8H/SCORPIO SATURN: KEEP THINGS TO URSELF. STAY PRIVATE. PRACTICE SELF CONTROL. RESILIENCE IN THE FACE OF HARDSHIP. HOPE FOR THE BEST, PREPARE FOR THE WORST. SAVINGS/RAINY DAY RESOURCES. EMBRACE CHANGE. LEARN TO LET GO. RADICAL ACCEPTANCE. SEXUAL DISCIPLINE. XTRA EMPHASIS ON SAFE SEX!
9H/SAGITTARIUS SATURN: PRACTICE UR BELIEFS. WALK THE TALK. MANTRAS. LEARN FROM OTHERS ; COME TO UR OWN CONCLUSIONS. STUDY. BE AN ETERNAL STUDENT. ALLOW URSELF TO BE OUT OF UR ELEMENT. RESPECT OTHER CULTURES. MAKE UR OWN TRADITIONS. STAY HUMBLE. ACCEPT MULTIPLE TRUTHS. APPLY WHAT WORKS.
10H/CAPRICORN SATURN: KEEP UR EYES ON THE PRIZE. TRUST THAT ALL THINGS COME IN DUE TIME. KEEP URSELF MOTIVATED. WORK FOR WHAT U WANT. STAY CONSISTENT. PERSONAL LEGACY ; THINGS THAT LAST. BECOME UR OWN ROLE MODEL. DO IT URSELF / DO IT RIGHT. LIVE WITH KARMA IN MIND.
11H/AQUARIUS SATURN: LEAD THE WAY ; FURTHER THE CAUSE. BETTER THE COMMUNITY— CREATE UR OWN. BE CONSCIOUS OF WHOM U ASSOCIATE URSELF WITH. BEFRIEND PPL OLDER THAN URSELF. LONGTERM FRIENDSHIPS. LONGTERM RESULTS. ADVANCEMENT. NETWORKING. ONLINE INFLUENCE. SET THE STANDARD.
12/PISCES SATURN: ALL IN MODERATION. HEALTHY COPING METHODS & LIFESTYLE PRACTICES. CONSIDERATION. REFLECTION ; SELF AWARENESS. THERAPY. STANDARDS. LEAVE ONCE DISRESPECTED. NO FAKE FRIENDS. MIND OVER MATTER. MANIFESTATION. BE REAL WITH URSELF. SELF TRUST.
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Living under hypercapitalism is hilarious because it's like some guy stomped out of physics class because he insisted infinite acceleration is always possible for everything and he was like "I'll show you, I'll make my own math and prove everything can always get larger faster FOREVER!" Then like a week later he smugly shows the physics prof his economics excel chart and he's like "You forgot one key factor! I found a way to create infinitely increasing growth using a resource you didn't account for and which never runs out! Human labor!" And then he goes off and is put in charge by people who also hated the dumb physics professor who wasn't even talking about like finances or anything. But then it turned out line still doesn't go up forever so the same guy comes back and is like don't worry I have a solution for this problem too, and it's that you always have to remember the line does go up forever no matter what and everyone else is wrong, it's what you want that matters, so they come back and are like okay throw more babies into the line go up machine and now we're here.
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Vil is one of the most well-written characters in Twisted Wonderland and I’m still baffled that people still manage to misinterpret him when nothing about him is that difficult to understand.
People always bash him for his obsession with beauty and reduce it to vanity when it was explained time and time again that Vil cares as much about internal beauty as external beauty. His search for growth was never centred around aesthetics only.
It’s also further explained that his pursuit of beauty is the path he believes would help him reach his goal of staying the longest on stage/being the hero. Vil’s book is about an actor who has been told ever since he was a child that he was meant to be the villain. Which was a role he didn’t wish to entertain so he worked his hardest to be worthy of the role he wanted, the role that would allow him to stay the longest on stage.
He learned all sorts of skills, pursued his studies, took care of his appearance, he did anything and everything in the name of improving himself, to be worthy of a role that keeps being denied to him and given to someone else, Neige. Then when he finally reached his limit after years of trying his hardest just to keep failing he lost it.
Even then why did he overblot? Because he couldn’t forgive himself. Because he couldn’t accept that he had become the villain, the exact thing that he had spent all his time and effort rejecting. Vil is terrified of being ugly inside and outside. He is terrified of being corrupted. He’s terrified of being bad.
People also love to bash him for being strict but he is one of the most caring housewarden. He does rule with an iron fist but even at his worst his motivation is always in his students’ best interest. Even Epel has to concede once he understands Vil’s true goal. On top of that Vil actually shows that he takes accountability for his actions, he knows how to apologise and he feels remorse for his wrongdoings.
Let’s not even talk about how he sacrificed himself for Idia and the world’s sake later on. As if this wouldn’t fully compromise his future.
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