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jyoongim · 3 months

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ANON ASKED: realder is a shy doe that’s like 5ft. She pretty much avoids Alastor like her life depends on it, because he makes her uncomfortable, and of course he knows he does. She goes into heat, but doesn’t find a partner. She just gets very tired and just goes into hibernation. Alastor find that very interesting to say the least. After staying at the hotel for so long, their heats sync and its a mess for him and she isn’t aware of it.

Degrading, voice kink, size kink, and breeding kink. Ear and tail pulling??? Fem! Reader receiving

So i think i missed a few marks and then it spiraled but i did my best to fulfill your request as best my ability!!!!

@animeloveruwu1234

As the weather got colder, you started to rarely be seen around the hotel. Your heat was rolling around and the urge to nest was nagging you.

You sighed, rolling out of bed and heading down for breakfast.

You were greeted with the scent of warm deliciousness. You pile your plate full of food, opting for more sweets and meats to the surprise of the other residents.

“ Christ. Slow down Toots, you’re gonna choke.” Angel laughed as you munched happily on a avocado toast sausage bacon mix.

You giggled “Its winter Angel, i have to pack on some weight. I tell you every year” Your ears perked in alert when static ran up your body. Your ears drooped when Alastor entered the kitchen. “Why what a fine hellish day it is!”

He hummed as he waltzed past you, you nearly choked on your food when he leaned over your shoulder, looking at your plate “Didn’t take you for the cannibalism type doe” grinning as you looked away, huffing ”its cooked” as he stole a piece of ham.

“Does typically pick up weight in the winter. They have to fill out in order to provide for fawns. They make for excellent pickings during hunting season” Alastor said as he buttered his toast, eyes on you as you squirmed slightly.

Angel and Charlie gawked “You’re gonna have a baby?!”

Your eyes widened “What!? No! Its just a deer thing. No fawns anytime soon” you blushed. Shaking your head you stood from the table, excusing yourself.

You weren’t necessarily afraid of Alastor, you had been around him long enough to get use to tolerate him, but the stag still made you uncomfortable, even after all this time around him. He reeked of dominance and power and your much softer nature did not mesh well with his intimidating one.You usually only spoke a few words to him, always excusing yourself to get away from him.

Like now, the comment about deer season had your skittish nature taking over, not liking the idea of potentially being a target.

Alastor chuckled as you walked by him. Your cute fluffy tail twitching, begging to be tugged on Alastor blinked at the intrusive thought.

That was new. He shook it off as just a sadistic moment.

————————————————————————————-

You curled in your pile of blankets as your heat raked through you.

Over the last few days, Charlie was so kind to leave you food and water so you didn’t have to go to the kitchen.

But you were itching for fresh air. Stretching your legs would do you some good.

Maybe you would find a partner to mate with on your outing.

You took a deep breath of fresh air as you exited the hotel, sighing happily. You bobbed around the city, nose sniffing out any potential males.

After a while your body started to heat up and you were going tired. You weren’t successful as most demon you met were either too eager to keep you tied up or not interested.

oh well.

As you approached the hotel a faint musky scent had your senses in a frenzy. You subconsciously followed the faint scent and ended up in the kitchen. No one was in there, but a tray of food was perched on the table, probably for you.

The last few weeks you were eating way more to keep up the energy that was burning through you.

You stuffed your mouth as you sniffed again, sighing deeply as the scent seemed to fog your head.

You had your fill and went to retreat to your bedroom, when you bumped into a solid chest.

Your ears perked at the sound of a faint growl and static.

”Careful doe” a deep voice purred.

Alastor.

You took a step back, ears furrowing back “Oh! I’m sorry Al”you looked up at him.

The tall red demon smiled down at you, but something seemed off.

His smile looked strained, and his ears were flickering about, eyes narrowed. He looked slightly flustered.

Your instincts had you look over him, to see if you could find the sense of his discomfort.

You hand reached out to press against his forehead, his skin was clammy.

Alastor didn’t flinch from your touch or slap your hand away, instead his head leaned into your hand, making your head tilt in question.

”Al? Do you feel alright?” Your eyes filled with worry. Alastor hummed, a sharp claw clasping your chin as he chuckled “Oh its nothing I cant handle dear.” You nodded, taking his word and made your way back to your room.

You curled in your nest as you thought about how strangely the demon was acting. But maybe it really was nothing.

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Alastor had smelled the most delicious scent waft across his nose. It smelled familiar but it was just too sweet to pinpoint who it belonged to. So he followed it.

The scent led him to the kitchen where he found you.

The little doe was having her filling, consuming some food, stuffing her soft cheeks with whatever was on the tray.

You looked plumper. Softer. For as long as he had known you, your heats were interesting to witness.

You tended to eat more, your usual slim figure filling out to accommodate the energy you burned. You often hid away when you were in heat. Something that Alastor found interesting.

Most does sought out partners to satisfy them, but not you.

He had overheard you how most of the times you did go seeking partners but no one tickled your fancy enough.

Something about that made his chest tingle.

No one would be able to satisfy you like he could his instincts screamed.

With another deer around, your heats triggered his ruts.

He had never interacted with you while in a rut, so when you bumped into him, he wasn’t ready for the consequences.

You let out a cute little squeak when you collided with his chest, ears perked as you registered the static he let off.

He felt his cock stir in his pants as he breathed in your scent.

Your heat must have been flaring as he could taste how your cunt smelled.

His ears furrowed against his head, the only indicator that something was wrong. He kept up his composure as you nervously apologized. But as he too was in rut, he was sure he was showing some signs, as you asked if he was ok.

He tensed up as he felt your hand on his cheek, but leaned into your touch.

Your soft voice laced in concern as you looked over him, checking to make sure he wasn’t ill.

Oh what a naive doe.

It was taking every bit of control he had to not take you against the kitchen table.

how would you look as he took you?

Would you beg him to make a mess of you?

Would you let him breed you to the point your cunt dripped with his cum?

He let out a low growl once you left the kitchen, turning his head to watch your full ass sway as your tail twitched about.

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A knock at your door had you stirring awake from the comfort of your makeshift nest.

You were much too tired and had no desire to answer whoever was on the other side of the door. Your heat was at a all time high and the stickiness between your thighs, a result of your abusing your poor clit for relief. If it was Charlie, then she would just leave food at your door. Your eyes started to drift close, the sweet call of sleep sounding so appealing.

Your ears twitched at the knock again, a soft growl escaping your throat.

Your tired brain did not catch up with your nose as you swung open the door, tired eyes widening as you are face to chest? With Alastor.

You keened your neck to look up at him; head tilting as the red demon peered down at you with black blown out eyes.

”Al?”you asked confused, rubbing at your eyes sleepily.

”Apologies my dear, did I wake you?” He asked, head tilted, voice feign concern, his red ears erect and honed in on your soft panting, eyes narrowing at he took in the slight coat of sweat on your skin and how disoriented you seemed.

You nodded wordlessly, now highly aware that you, a doe were in full heat, evidence of that clinging to your thighs, and a stag was at your door.

Your heart sounded in your ears as your eyes raked over Alastor, accessing him.

Taking mental notes of mating potential instinctively.

“I thought you were Charlie…she usually leaves me food”

He hummed, a clawed hand coming up to your face to grip your chin. You blinked. Body buzzing.

Alastor’s instinct were screaming to push you back into your room and claim you in your nest, and satisfy the burn in his body.

Your scent had basically coated the hotel in its sweet smell. The scent making his cock twitch and antlers itch.

And the scent of your cunt had his mouth watering.

And he will have his fill.

”Your heat must take a lot out of you dear” his hands reached to soothe your tense shoulders, fingertips massaging the flesh. You stayed still as his hands roamed your body, softly pawing at the curves you gained from your heat.

His lips nipped at your soft ear, purring into it “I could provide assistance if you like?”

Your tail wagged as you gulped “A-Assistance?” You asked.

From your time around the red demon, you have never known him to willingly help people. Alastor maintained a sense of control in every situation, twisting and bending the rules to be in his favor.

A doe in heat should be easy to manipulate.

”Yeeeessss anything you want my dear! Think of it as ‘I scratch your back so you can scratch mine’ type of deal hmmm?” He chuckled darkly, slowly backing you into your room.

————————————————————————————-

Soft moans filled the room, accompanied by the hum of static as Alastor sucked at your clit.

You were sprawled out on your back in your nest, knees on either side of Alastor’s head as he lavished your clit with his tongue.

You panted as his tongue dipped into heat, thighs shuddering as it curled and lapped at your juices.

”H-Hah!! Ah! Ah! A-Al!” You whined, toes curling when he sucked the sore bud into his mouth. You tugged at the big antlers that separated your legs.

He had already made you cum on his fingers twice; cooing into your neck as you cried, cunt clenching around the digits like a vice.

Alastor grunted lowly, nipping at your clit with sharp teeth before sucking it back into his mouth. A finger dipped to fill you as he flicked your clit. Your gummy walls squeezing him, contracting at the intrusion but welcoming him into its depths.

He cooed around into your cunt, eyes looking up at you.

Your face was flushed and slick with sweat. Hands at your breasts, pulling and massaging your perky nipples.

Pouty lips parted as your moans tore from your throat.

”oooh c’mon doll, one more. You’ve been doing so good.”

Your body felt like it was burning. Each orgasm fogging your head with pure desire to be sated properly.

Your hips followed the rhythm of his tongue, using the hold on his antlers to ride his face.

Alastor let you be. Happily curling his finger inside you as he lapped up your essence.

Your back arched as a third orgasm ripped through you, teeth clenching as your hips twitched in overstimulation, but riding it out to make the sensation last.

You sighed as you went limp, eyes hazily looking up at the ceiling, waiting to fall back to earth.

But you didn’t have the time to tuck your legs back in and roll over to sleep, when Alastor adjusted himself onto his knees and pulled you flush to his hips.

A surprised “Ah!” Escaped your lips as your cunt was filled to the brim.

With cock.

Alastor growled, hissing as finally your cunt so asked around him, unsure whether to welcome him. A harsh thrust broke what little resistance your walls gave and had you mewling.

“Oh fuck!”

Large claws kneaded at your fleshy thighs, holding them to your chest as his hips crashed down into yours, cock hitting that sweet nerve over and over, making you coat his cock in creamy slick.

”Al-Alastor! Ha! Nggh ooh fuuuck me!” You cried, tears forming in your eyes as he pounded your count.

”You would think after all this time, I wouldn’t blink when you’re in heat. But oh darlin’ you always know how to catch my interest.” He goated lightly, a claw coming up to your parted lips, his thumb pressing inside as you sucked subconsciously on the digit.

His eyes narrowed at you, pulling his hips back to snap them forward as a response.

”Do you know how divine you smell? Just walking around with a dripping cunt without a care. Many demons would kill to fuck a cunt this appealing” a dark smirk curled on his lips when your cunt made a wet sound. “And Ill kill many demons to keep it to myself” he purred setting out a rough pace, claws on your round hips to pull you into his thrusts, keeping his cock nestled within your warm cavern.

Alastor was fucking you in your nest

A place sacred for only a doe’s mate

did that mean…was he?

Your brain was reeling. It couldn’t keep up with the sensations that were raking through your body. Your hands found purchase in the surrounding blankets as you let out moans that if you were in your right mind, would have left you embarrassed.

”mmhmm hmmm nngh Ah! Hhhaaa!” Your body jolted with his thrusts, the squish squelch noise of your cunt, echoing in your ears.

”Oh what a sweet doe you are my dear. I’ve always wonder what lied under that shy demeanor. And my my I wasn’t disappointed. A whore willing to spread her legs and be mounted.” You whimpered as he manhandled you onto your belly, knees barely supporting you as he slotted himself back inside you. You felt a heavy weight on your head, tugging to force your body to bounce on his cock.

when did your horns come in?

You hadn’t realized it, but you had transformed into your demon form.

and fucking hell were you gorgeous Alastor thought, hands wrapped around your slender horns and using them to control your movements.

Your tongue hanged out your mouth as your ass took the brute force of his thrusts. Alastor’s cock felt amazing.

Better than you could have imagined and so much better to scratch that lusty itch.

There was a puddle forming underneath you, soaking the bed, making the skin of Alastor’s thighs stick to yours.

Finally getting a look at your backside, Alastor felt his cock twitch as his eyes roamed down to where his cock was disappearing into you. His eyes zeroed in on your tail.

His hand dragged down your back, sharp claws cutting slightly to make blood ripple done your back. He wrapped his hand around your tail, softly twindling the tuft of fur before pulling.

A high-pitch moan left your throat. Your cunt clenched around him in response.

interesting he thought smiling as he used his grip on your tail to really make you take his cock deeper.

Your cunt was a soppy mess.

”Oh you like your tail pulled on dear? What a nautghty girl” Alastor chortled as he rocked his hips into you.

You were completely dazed with lust, that tingling knot forming in your stomach.

”please” you begged, pushing your hips against him, mewling as his hit the sponge that had you feeling sparks.

Alastor leaned over to your ear, never breaking his pace.

”hmmm? What was that dear?” He taunted cruelly.

”are you begging? What do you want doll? Cause I’m not going to stop til you’re filled with my cum. Is that what you want?”

You nodded “yes! Please please please let me cum! Cum in me- i w-want your cum please! Ha! Fuuuucckk” you whined, hand reaching underneath you to play with your clit.

”A-Al…please…breed me please i want it! I want it so bad!”

That had his cock twitch and hammer into you at record speed.

”oooh don’t worry your pretty head. You’ll get your fill”

Angled thrusts had your body jolting against the bed as you cried out, moaning so loud you were sure everyone in the hotel could hear you.

Alastor thought you were beautiful. How lovely you were covered in blood and sweat as he pounded you out. Your body went rigid before he felt your cunt flutter around him, milking him dry.

Your body slumped forward as he continue to ride out your orgasm.

”what a pretty doe, that’s a good girl. Milking my cock like a wanton slut. That’s it. I’m going to fill you up so good, I’m going to carve your cunt to only take my cock. You’ll like that wont you sweetheart? F-Fuck take it baby take it!” He grunted, snapping his hips into yours before he let out a loud growl, cock twitching before spilling his cum into you, painting your gooey walls white.

You let out a low whine feeling his warm goo fill you, before he pulled out, finally letting your body go.

You convulsed on the bed, panting as you felt his sticky spunk start to leak out of you.

Alastor sighed, rubbing your thighs as you came down from your high.

He chuckled “yes I think you’ll do just fine darlin”

Maybe heat cycles weren’t so bad after all…especially when there was a Doe ready to be filled with cum.

”Lovely”

#hazbin hotel #hazbin alastor #alastor #alastor x reader #alastor the radio demon #hazbin hotel fanfiction #jyoongim #alastor x y/n #alastor smut #alastor hazbin hotel #Its mating season for deers!!!

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carrotkicks · 9 months

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alternative chuuya ship propaganda under the cut

TsujiChuu -> they had exactly TWO (2) encounters but in those 10~ minutes Tsujimura has immediately waxed poetic about how chuuya is a unique and intriguing man (as most special division agents do), and went out of her way to know more about him. and Chuuya immediately empathized her personal struggles with her ability, and gave her advice on how to both control it and accept it as part of her instead of something that was placed in her**. (hmmm stormbringer chuuya and gaiden tsujimura parallels. there's a reason they met.) Anyways Tsujimura is super high-strung and chuuya (when he's not purposely being riled up) is actually really laid back so they'd mesh well personality wise. And they could have an fbi x criminal secret romance thing happening.

ChuuRan -> they definitely fucked in the book. Lol. Also it's a match up that is spiritually similar to skk but 20x funnier because they have zero history and and wayyy more petty beef. in a more serious note, Chuuya probably does have some respect for Ranpo ---not respect for his intellect. I don't think chuuya would be impressed by anyone acting like a cocky genius, he was partnered with dazai after all-- recognizing him as the agency's "lynchpin" and all that. On Ranpo's side, i think he respects chuuya as a Threat, so that side adventure in the Poe's book was probably both to keep him away from the Cannibalism war thing and also gain an ~ally~ of sorts. IDK I JUST WANNA KNOW WHAT HAPPENED IN THE BOOK BRO

TaintedLemons -> Chaos and property destruction boyfriends ftw! They're canonically drinking buddies too! Chuuya is a messy lightweight, so what if when Hirotsu is unavailable, it's Kajii who helps him back home or let's him crash at his place 🥺? Kajii actually seems to be pretty high ranking, what with him just casually chatting up Kouyou and Mori trusting him with undercover missions. Kajii should be promoted, we have 2 exec seats after all. Kajii's silly eccentric personality and their friendship helps Chuuya put a positive connotation to mad scientists. Also they're literally always near each other in the group shots and official art, it's literally canon.

ChuuAku -> another one that isn't too rare but seriously underrated. Chuuya is that super supportive borderline embarassing boyfriend that takes 5 minutes each day to divulge words of affirmation, and he'd make dinner and use the cheesy pet names, the kinda stuff that makes Akutagawa want to explode/shrivel up and die. See as soon as Akutagawa is involved i think Chuuya should be flattened to the cookie cutter token love interest. He'd murder daz for a birthday gift. He's be Akutagawa's personal cheerleader and nothing more. This is also basically a canon ship btw..

#i've been thinking hard about this because if dazai is a fail boyfriend i need to start looking at other viable options #i didn't finish the chuuaku aesthetic list imsorry #so in my mind chuuya is like a main character but also. also i think he works perfectly as the copypaste emotional support love interest.#excels even. that's chuuaku to me. tsujichuu to an extent too #chuuran is kinda popular i believe. i see the appeal. it's very silly #taintedlemons is obviously the closest to canon though obvsly #anyways #doodle

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cyb3rtarot · 6 months

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Pick a Pile: Self Care Advice

Disclaimer: this is not about self care in terms of skincare and the like, this is about improving your overall well being. Tarot readings are not replacements for professional advice. Take what resonates; don’t force a reading to fit. In this reading I used the Alice in Wonderland Oracle, Zerner-Farber tarot, Tarot of Mystical Moments, the Oracle of the Radiant Sun, and a recolored Smith-Waite.

pile 1‣pile 2 pile 3‣pile 4

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Pile 1:

Cards: Curioser and Curioser rx, wheel of fortune, temperance rx, Organization (Mercury in Capricorn, 10th house), Dagaz rune|| I Wonder What Will Happen, Impossible Things, You Are Rare and Free, Optimism (Moon in Sagittarius, 9th house), five of swords, ace of wands, Uruz rune

Current State of Self Care: hello pile one! It seems like you guys really like routine. You do similar things everyday or when you practice self care, and this helps you stay on track and organize your thoughts. It’s comfortable, and you’re not too enthusiastic about exploring things that get in the way of this routine. I feel like this pile really likes spending time with animals and nature (some of you are farmers or gardeners), and you might feel disinterested with people and their “strange” activities as a whole. I also feel like you guys really like to do things during the day when the Sun is up. People might invite you out in the evening or night—maybe to casinos or clubs—but you’d rather not. You might prefer to do things alone, or to just spend your free time really peacefully instead of doing something that requires a lot of social energy. Totally understandable! However, there’s a feeling that rigidity or sameness is causing imbalance when it comes to other areas of your life.

Self Care Advice: you guys are encouraged to try new things that fall in line with your individuality. A large part of why this pile likes to stick to the familiar is because of past experiences when trying new things with others. I feel like you’ve tried to step outside your comfort zone before; you’ve been roped into the family vacations or group activities you didn’t want to do and it didn’t go well. Some of you have trouble meshing with the other people in your lives. So, instead of continuously ending up in uncomfortable situations, you’ve stuck to yourself and what you know. I see some of you feel limited due to your health or physical ability? However, there are things you can do in your home or in solitude to expand your world. Perhaps, you could try at-home hobbies, such as crochet. I see a lot of you would really enjoy solo travel. If you want to socialize, maybe you can do something chill with just one friend instead of 5, or do something online (an online event?). You guys have a sense of disbelief when it comes to new things, thinking if it can go wrong it will. But both great experiences and lessons come out of the unknown. You’re encouraged to allow yourself curiosity without compromising on your boundaries.

Extra Details: environmental activism, walking through the forest/woods (some of you that believe in God feel most connected to Them in nature), pet dog (a black one, red collar?), tea (some of you might really enjoy trying new teas? Or reading tea leaves), international travel, homebody, small house, lives with parents but isn’t close to them, stuffed animals, recent graduation, eagles, video call meetups/events

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Pile 2:

Cards: You are Rare and Free, Falling, Mortality, the moon rx, Exaltation (Moon in Taurus, 2nd house)|| Gebo rune, seven of wands rx, You are Rare and Free (again), Uncertainty, Impossible Things, the hierophant

Current State of Self Care: hello pile two! You guys came through with a very YOLO attitude; “I’m here for a good time not a long time.” You guys are hyper aware that you have a limited amount of time to experience this life and try to practice self care by living accordingly. This pile might like to do very experimental or impulsive things. Things that others are afraid of like zip lining or skydiving. Or, you might make decisions that others perceive as careless, like traveling on a random whim or suddenly moving. Many of you have already experienced living a limited life, or watched someone else spend their life without ever doing what they really wanted. You’d rather make security where you go and find what makes you happy instead of having external security with regret.

Self Care Advice: a lot of you use a super-free and independent lifestyle (or mindset) as a defense mechanism. The less attachments you have, the less chance to be hurt or stifled. You have a lot of fun chasing freedom, but I’m getting that you do it to the point where it’s not fun anymore. I sense a curious energy towards some kind of attachment; maybe you’re interested in what it would be like to be in a committed relationship, to move somewhere permanently, or to get a job that would require you to be more stationary. Some of you view spontaneity and freedom as a way to get the most of what you want while giving the least. But in truth, no matter what we do we exchange something. If you are always doing something new, you exchange possibilities that can only come from being still. And when you don't do new things, you exchange opportunities to explore. You’re being called to care for yourself by sitting down and deciding what you’re really drawn to. Maybe you don’t think you could be happy unless you adhere to your current lifestyle—like this is how you can protect yourself. There are many possibilities outside of current habits that can bring joy. Your energy reminds me of Sandy from Spongebob when she’s trying to do every extreme activity she can before she has to hibernate. You are not being asked to compromise who you are (the cards strongly emphasize that your uniqueness is amazing!), but instead to be open to what your soul is calling for—even if you’re not sure how it will go. The cards also emphasized your security ultimately comes from -you-, not the world around you.

An extra message wanted to come out with the king of pentacles, strength rx, and queen of cups: you’re prompted to be vulnerable with your feelings! You’re encouraged to face fears and apprehensions so you can emotionally appreciate your blessings. And as a lot of you are in relationships, this includes vulnerability with the other people (or person). Examine what in your life has made you feel the way you do today, and if it’s necessary to bring these mindsets forward. Your extra advice is to be real with yourself and know you have the strength and courage to express yourself authentically.

Extra Details: experiencing death of loved ones at a young age, feeling life is unfair or you have to make your own fairness, revenge or vigilante mindset, you might feel like you’re on a timer? Anxieties about health, confident demeanor but anxious inside, wanting to settle down, being at crossroads, feeling really ready for something, being in nature or gardening (tomatoes?), you could write a lot of movie reviews or fanfiction?, you could also write fantasy stories, environmental or social justice, catching feelings for a casual partner is significant for some of you (aww it feels like they give you butterflies :] )

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Pile 3:

Cards: Use Your Time Well, Curioser and Curiouser, Nonsense!, I Wonder What Will Happen Next, Ace of Swords, Mortality rx|| Clock time, Acquisition (Sun in Taurus, 2nd house), Flirtation (Venus in Sagittarius, 9th house), Bluff (Jupiter in Gemini, 3rd house), the hierophant rx, Protection (Moon in Aries, 1st house), three of hearts rx, the chariot rx, Berkano rune

Current State of Self Care: hello pile three! I feel like your self care right now is not what most people consider self care. Your cards emphasize being in a period of life that’s closing or feeling like you soon have to make a decision about something. You’re trying to get serious with yourself so that you’re able to transition into the next chapter. This is manifesting as more thought-based activities like researching, studying, meditating, brainstorming, and the like. You’re organizing your thoughts and trying to be informed for whatever is approaching you (for some this is literal with final exams coming up). I did get this stifled, antsy feeling when I connected to your energy; you might feel overwhelmed with your own brainstorming or with reality. Many of you are comforting yourself by dragging through this phase. You may keep telling yourself you have a lot of time or that you can do something later, so you keep procrastinating and lengthening the process.

Self Care Advice: you’re being called to be realistic with your time pile 3. I think you’ve enjoyed toying or flirting with ideas and not committing—and for a chunk of you this is literally about stringing someone along. What would be beneficial now is a re-evaluation of how you’re allocating time and energy. Eventually procrastination does become harmful—especially if other people are involved. I don’t feel this is necessarily the case for most yet; I see you've been able to bluff your way through life and take it day by day. But the time is coming where you’ll have to choose a path to take. I see many of you getting overwhelmed due to a lack of support and guidance. You might be surrounded by people who make you feel more confused, either because they can’t help you or because their advice doesn’t resonate with you. Some of you aren’t actually as unsure as you come across. You may be drawn to something already but it feels unconventional, and this instills doubt in you (or you might be afraid of financial instability too?). Whatever your situation is, protecting your energy will be helpful. When you feel pressure, you can redirect this into productivity instead of procrastination. You may have to draw back your energy from draining sources to better channel it into yourself. This includes protecting yourself from being swayed by what is not authentic to you. Even though you feel the weight of your life upon you, know that taking one path doesn’t mean you have to walk it forever. A very specific note for some people in this pile is that there are better ways to protect your feelings and vulnerability in relationships than just ignoring important conversations!

Extra Details: Northern US (New England or close to the Canadian Border), graduating, final exams, researching real estate for a move, this is so random but you might like catching or eating crab? You might’ve played a browser game called Catch a Crab bc that’s what popped in my head 😭, or you might feel nostalgic about your youth—wanting life to freeze forever. Maine, Orlando, Louisiana, feeling insecure, eating muShrooms, a new phase of life, not telling your plans to everyone, plants and plant medicine are very specific for this pile. Spending time in nature—with trees specifically, being more in love than you admit (waay more lol), wanting to be a musician, listening to ariana grande, liking someone with blue eyes. Wanting to move with a partner, unhelpful advice from parents/guardians, procrastinating study sessions

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Pile 4:

Cards: Falling, It’s Always Teatime, King of Swords, Elk rune, six of swords rx, the empress rx|| Messages for a Rabbit, Set Your Course, death rx, I Wonder What Will Happen Next, seven of swords

Current State of Self Care: hi pile four! This pile’s goal is to cope with the lack of control over their life. There’s a sense of feeling stuck in a free fall where you’re constantly pushed around by crazy, external forces. There could be a sense of repetitiveness too. For example, maybe you go to school or a job everyday, but there’s always an extreme deadline to meet. Or when you’re finally getting a grip on the last major life event, another one barrels you over. It seems like you’re constantly in a reactive state or tower moment. To cope, you might like to engage in the same things repeatedly for comfort. I’m also getting this pile might like to read up on their interests a lot in their free time; there’s emphasis on mental activities. You’re quite aware you need to balance constant stress with self care, but physically taking care of yourself may be difficult. For example, knowing you need extra sleep, healthy food, or exercise, but feeling like these are outside your capacity. Some of you may be drawn to pile 1; there’s very similar themes and details.

Self Care Advice: first of all, if you have pets, you’re encouraged to spend time destressing and cuddling with them as self care. But your main advice here is to plan. You may currently be in a space where it’s not easy to go and do new things. So, use this time to really lay out what you want. Don’t let yourself be discouraged by your current restraints. Think about what in your life you’d remove if you had the chance, and what you would pursue if you could. Writing it down could be helpful. This way, even if you can’t currently obtain those things, you’ll be ready if an opportunity comes your way. Instead of ruminating over whether you should or shouldn’t and miss it, you’ll know which path in the crossroads to take because you’ve done most of the thinking. Many of you may also feel tied down by people or duties around you. You’re being reminded that you don’t have to let everyone know your every plan. It’s easy to be influenced when you’re already under stress—or literally controlled by others. It’s ok to keep your thoughts to yourself or protect your future wishes from those who aren’t aligned with you. If you’re in a tough spot, maybe you have to do this planning kind of on the secret side. For example, if you’re trying to escape a family situation, maybe be extra careful about browser history if you choose to research at home. Overall, you’re being asked to think, plan, and be smart with your current situation and resources.

Extra Details: special interests, neurodivergence, executive dysfunction, some of you experienced several huge shifts in life or family one right after the other, Europe, church (mainly getting Roman Catholic), stuffed animals, feeling controlled by family or society (perhaps being pressured to perform traditional gender roles), Australian accent, animals as signs, a pet or multiple, wanting a humanitarian or environmental job. You may feel like your life has been the opposite of a fairytale, like Cinderella with no ball or carriage. Social isolation. Some of y’all really like fanfiction lool

𓆸

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crezz-star · 6 months

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I can't help but wonder about your One Piece OC! I know you've mentioned that he's a mature person in the crew, but do you see him as more of a sibling/parental role to Luffy, or is he part of the shenanigans with usopp/chopper/luffy, or is he like tired uncle like Jinbei (or secretly amused like zoro) ? I am eager to hear about where he meshes in with crew especially luffy

I also can't help but wonder if our first mate gets jealous of him often. You mentioned that you do, but I think about like what if some days luffy just misses Ace, and luff will stare at Jean a lot more sometimes or just hover around him just to relive being with his brother *cries*

✨Kira kira yoho!✨

Hello!

Ahhh!! Im so happy and excited every time I get question about my OCs (❤´艸｀❤) Thank you for taking interest and being curious about Jean!

To answer. He is more of big brother type. Not just to Luffy but to everyone. Even the older mature straw hats. Jean just have so much love to give, growing up not knowing much about the world, isolated and thinking himself to be a slave until death. It really is Luffy and the strawhats who saved him and his fellow slaves so, he's enthusiastic in showing them how much he cares for them. how thankful he is to them for saving him, and along with that, his life. So he spoils everyone like this cool doting brother.

I'm actually planning to make one paged comic series ( kind of like 4 koma? ) in his interactions with the strawhats. As well as discovering more of the world. little sneak peek with Sanji ( ignore the cross. i changed that to a locket )

Here, Jean becomes the big brother Sanji dreamed and should have had. At first it annoys Sanji to no end even saying stuff like " gross, dont touch me. its weird! " but Jean is so gentle towards the crew, even helping Sanji wash the dishes, even cleaning the kitchen at night to surprise Sanji that eventually, Sanji accepts Jean. And finally allows himself to be spoiled. Even bringing out that side of Sanji that longs for a caring brother. One he only dreamed back then.

Jean has that ability to let everyone's hidden side of wanting to be spoiled and Jean is all to happy to do so. He is just so happy to be there with everyone. That he never really asks for anything in return.

--------------

As for Zoro being made Jealous by Jean. Yes he does that. but there is a moment only the three of them knows. Its when Luffy gets nightmares about Ace every now and then. most of the time he can deal with it, but there are times he's so shaken. When Jean wasn't around yet, it's Zoro trying to calm him down. But when jean arrived, the three of them found out that, despite being freaked out by jean and Ace looking alike, Jean helps Luffy calm down due to his voice being exactly like Ace's. Along with it, Jean's hugs is just one of the best. Even beating hugs from Jinbei. There's a strange therapeutic effect.

Here is a comic I doodled quickly just now to show that.

I still wanted to emphasize the eerie feeling from Jean and Ace's similarities are so the comic ended up a bit off. (laughs) please forgive me!

Every time this happens, Luffy does apologize to Jean for asking him to 'talk' like Ace. He knows it's wrong, but honestly, Jean would do anything to calm Luffy. and He knows Luffy doesn't mean it and that he's just suffering, So Jean is very patient with him and never really feels offended at all.

And that is all the answers I have!

Thank you for being interested in Jean!! 💖💖

✨Have a sparkling day!✨

#zolu #ゾロル #portgas d ace #one piece #one piece oc #kureask

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jbaileyfansite · 9 days

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Interview with the Los Angeles Times (2024)

“This is where all the cruising happened.”

Jonathan Bailey and I are standing in Pershing Square on a bright, blustery spring afternoon, nearing the end of a homemade queer history tour of downtown L.A.: One Magazine, Cooper Do-Nuts/Nancy Valverde Square, the Dover bathhouse, the Biltmore Hotel and this, the city’s former Central Park, a haven, since before World War I, for “fairies” and “sissy boys,” servicemen on leave and beatniks on the road.

“Is it still happening now?” he asks.

“Probably not as much,” I venture.

“Well, you let me know if it’s happening,” he teases, a mischievous smile lighting up his face.

Bailey understands the uses of the charm offensive. As Sam, the handsome Lothario of Phoebe Waller-Bridge’s delightful pre-”Fleabag” curio, “Crashing”; Anthony, the romantic hero of “Bridgerton’s” second season; and John, the jerk of a protagonist in Mike Bartlett’s love triangle play “Cock,” the English actor, 36, has swaggered up to the precipice of superstardom. With roles in such studio tentpoles as “Wicked” and “Jurassic World” on the horizon, he may just break through. Yet he delivers career-best work in Showtime’s queer melodrama “Fellow Travelers,” as anti-Communist crusader-turned-gay rights activist Tim Laughlin, by leaving behind the self-assured rakes and tapping a new wellspring: soft power.

Tim may be, as Bailey puts it, “an open nerve,” but as it turns out, the devout Catholic and political naïf — who falls for suave State Department operative Hawkins “Hawk” Fuller (Matt Bomer) just as Sen. Joseph McCarthy tries to purge the federal government of LGBTQ people — is formidable indeed.

Stretching from the Lavender Scare to the depths of the AIDS crisis, in scenes of tenderness, cruelty and toe-curling sex, Bailey’s performance communicates that little-spoken truth of relationships: It takes more strength to submit than it does to control. The former demands discipline, courage, trust; the latter requires only force.

“In ‘Bridgerton,’ [Bailey] is like a Hawkins Fuller character — he is very sexy and has lots of power, has that kind of confident charisma that absolutely is not Tim at all,” says “Fellow Travelers” creator Ron Nyswaner.

But any doubt about Bailey’s ability to mesh with Bomer, who boarded the project early in development, was put to bed with the actors’ virtual rehearsal of a meeting on a park bench in the pilot. “‘Well, that’s a first,’” Nyswaner recalls an executive texting him. “I cried in a chemistry read.”

‘Am I inviting people in?’

Bailey grew up in a musical family in the Oxfordshire countryside outside London, and this, coupled with an appreciation for the morning prayers, choir practice and Mass he attended as a scholarship student at the local Catholic school, fed his precocious talents. (“I loved the performance of it,” he laughs. “Not to diminish the celebration of religious process, but I did love the idea of wearing a gown.”) By age 10, he’d appeared in the West End, playing Gavroche in a production of “Les Misérables,” an experience he now recognizes as an encounter with a queer found family — albeit one shadowed by the toll of the AIDS crisis, which peaked in the U.K. in the mid-1990s.

“When I’m asked about my childhood, there’s so much I don’t remember, and I think that’s true of anyone who’s been in fight or flight for 20 years,” he says. “I would have been in a cast of people whose friends would have died in the last seven years. I think of where I was seven years ago. I had all my gay friends then. It’s only retrospectively that I can retrofit a real gay community around me [in the theater], that I just wasn’t aware of [then].”

During the late 1990s and early 2000s, American and British culture presented queer adolescents with a bewildering array of mixed signals. As beloved celebrities came out in growing numbers, and the battle for marriage equality became a central locus of LGBTQ political organizing, the media continued to propagate harmful stereotypes of gay men as miserable, lonely, perverted or worse — and, Bailey remembers, callously turned George Michael, arrested on suspicion of cruising in a Beverly Hills restroom in 1998, and Irish pop star Stephen Gately, who revealed his sexuality in 1999, fearful he was about to be outed, into tabloid spectacles.

No wonder Bailey, like many LGBTQ people of his generation, should feel the “chemical” thrill of “validation and acceptance” during London Pride at age 18, then embark on a two-year relationship with a woman in his 20s.

“Dangerously, if you’re not exposed to people who can show you other examples of happiness, you think that’s the easiest way to live,” Bailey says. “It’s funny. You look back and you can tell the story in one way, which is that I always knew who I was and my sexuality and my identity within that. But obviously at times, it was really tough. I compromised my own happiness, for sure. And compromised other people’s happiness.”

Disclosures about his personal life have become particularly thorny for the actor since the premiere of “Bridgerton,” the blockbuster bodice-ripper from executive producer Shonda Rhimes.

“The Netflix effect does knock you off center completely,” he says, recalling the experience of finding a paparazzo waiting outside his new flat before he’d even moved in. “Suddenly, you do start having nightmares about people climbing in your windows... Even now, talking about it makes me feel like, ‘Am I inviting people in?’”

He is also critical of the media for churning out headlines about the smallest details of celebrities’ private lives, often detached from their original context. In an interview with the London Evening Standard published in December, Bailey described a harrowing encounter in a Washington, D.C., coffee shop in which a man threatened his life for being queer — and, in recounting the experience, offhandedly mentioned the “lovely man” he’d called, shaken, after it happened. Although Bailey acknowledges that the original story handled the subject with aplomb, he felt dismayed that more attention wasn’t paid to the intended warning about rising anti-LGBTQ sentiment: “The only thing that got syndicated from that story was that I had a boyfriend, and it wasn’t true,” he sighs. “It was kind of depressing, if I’m honest.”

Still, Bailey, who once turned down a role in a queer-themed TV series because it would have required him to speed along revelations about his personal life he wasn’t ready to make, is prepared to embrace the power of vulnerability when it feeds the work. Although a member of his inner circle expressed doubts about “Fellow Travelers’” steamy sex scenes, for instance, the actor intuited that they were what made the project worth doing: “I was like, ‘I’m telling you, they are the reason why this is going to be brilliant.’”

‘He’s changed my trajectory in my own life’

To those who would complain about the state of sex in film and TV, “Fellow Travelers” is the perfect riposte. All of it matters, from Tim’s first flirtation with Hawk to the finale’s closing minutes, because the series, at its core, is about the importance of soft power: the strength required to bend, but not break; to adapt, but not abandon oneself; to survive without shrinking to nothing in the process.And depicting that through sex, specifically gay sex, makes “Fellow Travelers” radical indeed.

Bailey understands that baring so much comes with certain risks. When I tell him that research for the story has filled my algorithmic “For You” feed on X (formerly Twitter) with speculation that his onscreen relationship with Bomer has a real-life element, he notes that “shipping” fictional couples and costars alike has long been part of Hollywood fantasy. But he bristles at the implication that he and Bomer are anything but skilled actors at work.

“I would love for people to know that the success of our chemistry isn’t based on us f—. It’s actually about us leaning into the craft,” he says. “It’s a vulnerable situation to be in, talking about it on record. I don’t want to rob people of their thoughts. But I do have a set of values, and as an artist, you don’t need to be f— to tell that love story.”

Underlying that craft, Bailey adds, is the confidence to speak up, as with one scene in “Fellow Travelers” that was adjusted because he said, “I don’t want to be naked today.” He learned to use his voice the hard way: In his early 20s, he recalls, he was once “bullied” on set when “someone was threatened” by him and vowed to himself, “I’m never going to do that to someone. I’m never going to allow that to happen.”

This impulse to direct his influence in support of others has blossomed further with “Fellow Travelers.” On the day of our interview, Bailey enthuses about an upcoming meeting with legendary gay rights activist Cleve Jones and shares his idea for a docuseries recording the stories of elders in the LGBTQ+ community while they are still here to tell them. He describes lying in a hospital bed on set on World AIDS Day, in character as Tim, surrounded by gay men who had lost friends and lovers during the crisis, and finding himself thinking, “What do I want to leave behind?”

“I think he’s changed my trajectory in my own life,” Bailey says.

This is, perhaps, the most common reaction I know to diving deep into queer history — the understanding that we, like our forerunners, are responsible for shaping the queer future, whether in politics, society or art. No one is going to do it on our behalf.

As we stand on the nondescript corner now named for her, I relate the story of the late queer activist Nancy Valverde, who was arrested repeatedly while a barber school student in the 1950s on suspicion of “masquerading” because of her preference for short hair and men’s clothing, and later successfully challenged her harassment by the police in court.

“What a hero!” Bailey exclaims, wondering at Valverde’s bravery. “The thing that’s so interesting with power battles is, ultimately, identity is the thing that gives you the most strength and power in your life, isn’t it?

“Because that’s one thing people can’t take away from you: who you are and how you express yourself.”

Source

#jonathan bailey #jonny bailey #interviews #interviews:2024 #LA times interview 2024 #LA times #fellow travelers #NEW!

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jupiter-letters · 1 month

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Dating J'onn J'onnz would include:

Fem!Reader or GN!Reader TW: None

A/N: For the sake of my sanity and J’onn’s happiness, Martians are alive and well and these headcanons are based more on the young justice show. The reader is already a member of the justice league in this but maybe I’ll do some civilian headcanons later.

You both started out as pretty good friends but you never thought he’d like you romantically due to cultural differences. For him what you looked like didn’t really matter, your personalities meshed so well he wanted you around all the time.

Despite having an open and honest friendship you kind of tried to bury your feelings from J’onn when you guys would talk telepathically. He did pick up on this though and it bothered him for a while but he didn’t want to pry.

There��s this lingering tension though, you both like each other but one doesn’t want to overstep and the other is afraid of rejection. Other people can pick up on it too but nobody wants to say anything. There’s this romantic undertone with how you guys talk to each other but again nobody says anything. The other members of the league watching you guys interact is basically like this:

J’onn: “Would you like some refreshments after your journey to the watchtower? I’ve prepared some coffee for you.” You: Ah, no thank you I appreciate it! Are you ok? I heard your last fight in Metropolis was tough, I was worried about you. J’onn: And I you, your battle with Grodd caused me some distress but it was well fought. I’m happy you are unharmed.”

Wonder woman, Superman and Shazam standing in the corner like ???🧍‍♀️🧍‍♂️🧍???

Things really get shaken up when M’gann makes her debut, she picks up on it as soon as you enter the room thinking you wouldn’t mind(due to your friendship of course). She ends up reaching into that crevice you thought you’d hidden. J’onn is unaware of this for like a second before she just comes out and says it. “Uncle J’onn have you guys started dating yet??” After she says that he’s looking at her like 👁️👄👁️.

You fall out of your chair and M’gann realizes she messed up. Lucky for her she made a swift exit out of the room. You try not to make eye contact but J’onn is looking directly at you.

At this point you both couldn’t put it off anymore and talked it out. You tell him your insecurities and he does the same. His fears about the attraction not being mutual due to the whole alien thing. Fortunately for you guys none of that matters since you’re so sickeningly in love. Now we get to the nitty gritty! The dating!

J’onn does everything in his power to learn Earth customs, especially your own culture, the language, the food. He wants to learn about it all to be closer to you. If english isn’t your native language he does a little brain download of it and speaks it with you. He’ll even prepare your favorite dish despite many, many failed attempts. When you make the same effort to learn about Martian culture it really warms his heart. It’s a rocky road but you get the hang of it, his family loves having you over. They’ll shapeshift into you when you come over and give you one big hug.

You have to awkwardly explain why you’re seeing a new guy every week before J’onn chooses a form he likes. He doesn’t understand why it’d be a problem but he stops for you. It doesn’t matter though since he takes it off when you get home or when you’re among friends. He loves to shapeshifter for you to make you laugh, turning into celebrities or mascots to prank you. You wake up in the morning and open the bathroom door to see Chiitan taking a shower. He’ll even do stupid stuff like long furbys or the fresno nightcrawler.

Fighting together is a breeze, nobody is crazy enough to go after you in the field. And psychic attacks forget it, you can’t beat a martian when it comes to telepathy. People often underestimate how strong J’onn actually is but they do enter the process of fucking around and finding out. He never doubts your ability to protect yourself either but if the need arises and you get overwhelmed he will step in.

You understand J’onn’s feelings more than most, despite constantly being linked to each other’s mind. Like Bruce his body language is subtle, there are certain ways his lips twitch or how he rubs his fingers together. You both have a great understanding of each other’s emotions, it’s so wonderful, he never keeps things from you and is very blunt with his opinions. He feels like it’s insulting to you to use flowery language instead of being honest.

He doesn’t mind PDA, however much you’re comfortable with he’ll do. However he won’t be hanging off of you in public, he will stay within arms reach. He always wants you to know he’s nearby and you’re safe. His love language largely revolves around words of affirmation. J’onn is a great person to vent to since he is a great listener and he’s lived a long life so he’s got some words of wisdom. You need advice? He’s your man and if you don’t he’s a good listener.

You can literally feel how much he loves you, he’ll even show you how he sees you. All colorful and bright like the sun. He’d literally walk through fire for you, his loyalty is unmatched.🗣️🗣️ You always tell him he doesn’t need to but he’ll do it anyway. After the most difficult day of missions and handling Martian and Earth politics, a moment in your arms rejuvenates him. For someone who isn’t super touchy the other thing he loves to do is hold your head in his hands and press your foreheads together. No words are exchanged, you just quietly enjoy each other’s presence.

Thanks for reading! Lemme know what you think. Please like or reblog if you like my stuff.

#~⋆｡°tales from the dreaming #dcau x reader #dc comics headcanons #dc animated imagine #dc comics x reader #dcamu x reader #j'onn j'onzz x reader #j'onn j'onzz #dating headcanons #reader insert

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lunels · 11 months

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Hi, hope you’re doing well 💘 would I be able to request headcanons about what ellie’s ideal girl would be?

hii thank u! & thank u sm 4 requesting you're my first one!!! i hope you like :) also sorry i wrote a little too much..

ellie's ideal girl headcannons

automatically. she would luvvvvvv someone who is a badass. LIKE. confident, has some confidence. someone who isn't afraid to speak their mind or voice their opinion. i think of dina for example, who’s a little bit of a flirt. made it known that she liked ellie, who went and kissed ellie first. orrr riley, who was impulsive and willingly brought ellie along w her sometimes to show that she wasn’t afraid to join the fireflies. who showed she was determined to do what she thought was right. ellie is def into those types of women.... and more! hold on.

she'd love someone who could match her level of wittiness and have an even smarter mouth. sharp minded individuals!!! she would find that veryyyy attractive. someone who can have her a little speechless or gets her gears turning. like damn... okay, shit.

someone who doesn't take a lot of things seriously. WHO KNOWS HOW TO CRACK A DAMN JOKE. like come onnn we already know ellie is a big jokester !!!! she's a sarcastic girl. she would grow bored of someone who doesn't know how to have a little fun.. yk??? a little frisky.. a little..... yk???? just have SOME sense of humor and you're good. you make her laugh. you're married.

SOMEONE WHO ISN'T GONNA GET BORED OF HER TALKING AND RAMBLING AB THE STUFF SHE LIKES...... sorry to keep yelling at you. so sorry. 😇 just someone who listens to her!!!!! who is genuinely interested in learning more ab her interests!!! basically hearts in her eyes. she will love U 4ever.

someone who accepts her flaws regardless of what they are. she's an insecure girl. she would grow fond of someone who can accept her all, bad or good. who will stay after seeing her bad moments.

she'll neeeeddd someone who is the type to be reassuring when she feels like she's drowning and who makes her feel wanted. ellie is def the type to doubt herself and be heavily insecure in a lot of her abilities. feeling as if she's not good enough. she will feel drawn to people who see something in her and aren’t shallow. willing to show her that she is enough. that she is everything and more!!!

someone who is also, if not equally artistic as her. im not hating on the no hobby girls or the sleeps all day and stays in their room girls because thats also me! but i feel like a relationship w ellie or just a friendship in general would mesh very well if you had a handful of interests that you indulged in. bonus if youre into the same things!!! (she's already scribbling ab you in her journal) she’s THE clingy type but would like a bit of independence. don’t get me wrong for the sleeps all day girls, she’d love you too. promise. being in that gogogo mode and all that overworking she does to herself will backfire on her. just keep doing yo thanggg & she'll come thru

hate to say it but. someone who is motherly. idk how to explain it!! i hope that's not weird. like a nurturing person. she's been pretty much absent of a mother/mother figure her whole life and being friends/dating someone who nurtures and cares for her in a motherly way would have her HOOKED. she would be surpised at how good it feels to be taken care of for a little bit. she's not used to the being taken care of acts. or the just because kisses. or the long hugs when you notice she's off. or the frequent how are you feeling? how was your day? what's got you so worked up? dykwim?? does someone know what i mean???? just yeah. that.

alsoooo also idkkk but somebody who is the type to initate things. i know alot of ppl write/see ellie as the one to start everything and be on top and blahblahbalah and i do too sometimes! butttt she also second guesses she's nervyyyy she's veryyy much in her head. she will stand there and look at you with nothing behind her eyes screaming in her head wondering if you think of her the way she thinks of you UNTIL you just say i like you!!! wanna go out sometime?!?!? and you're set. done. she might as well just kiss you right there. if you go out of your way to show that you're interested, she'll do the rest. maybe. probably.

and that’s all i can think of thank you 4 requesting <3 xoxo, butterfly 🦋

#ellie williams x reader #ellie williams fluff #ellie williams headcannons

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peachirambles · 6 months

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can i request tamarack and qui with a mc who is obsessed with lots of creative things, like art and writing stories and all kinds of music, and loves sharing their interests and creations with their friends? idk it's just a cute headcanon i have for my mc.

OHHHH I LOVE THIS, i have an mc like that for OL1 but I haven't really thought about it for OL2 but now I am and I'm rubbing my hands together

Tamarack Baumann

From an early age, the MC and Tamarack always meshed well in the creative department, I imagine Tamarack as the sort of ten year old whose constantly drawing or playing pretend or doing anything fun when she's not outside

So naturally when the MC starts branching out into other creative outlets, Tamarack is quick to follow. In step 1, I can really see them doing all kinds of stuff together like writing, drawing, etc. If Tamarack sees the MC do something, she'll want to do it too

By step 2, all of that changed. Tamarack is far more reserved in that regard, she's moreso afraid of messing up in her own head than doing something for the fun of it like when she was younger.

However I can definitely see the MC getting into more specific hobbies too like writing fiction, altering their clothes and really anything they can get their hands on.

That includes anything Tamarack is willing to lend them to mess with, I can imagine them doing embroidery on her bag or her ribbon. Anything they personally decorated with is something she will always cherish and keep, even when she doesn't wear those articles of clothing anymore.

Step 3 is where Tamarack does start trying to "pay back" what the MC has done for her. Like I can definitely see her writing them some music and playing it for the MC to enjoy. Also baking, she does a lot of baking. That's something they can do together 🥰

Qiu Lin

Personally, this is where I prefer the MC to be a bit more inclined towards musical arts than visual like what I wrote with Tamarack. I can imagine the MC starting to figure out how to mess around with music in step 1 and Qiu being impressed

Just the general idea of young Qiu trying to dance to the music the MC makes or plays no matter what the rhythm or tempo actually is, it's so cute. I don't think Qiu would be as willing to try new stuff as much as Tamarack does but he has his own little ways of appreciating the MC's creativity

Step 2 or 2014 is where cellphones and stuff really started to take off, I don't know if anyone had a MP3 player but those were my babies and I think the MC or Qiu would have one and I really like the idea of the MC making Qiu a playlist for the both of them to listen to on field trips or rides together. It's a low energy activity which is good for Qiu at this stage

Also, another idea is the MC playing with makeup and Qiu being more or less their makeup doll even if it is for a few hours. I can imagine the MC talking with them while their doing their makeup, and Qiu can't really talk too much, but their definitely replying to the best of their abilities.

Thinking as well, if the MC does make them something tangible, I can imagine step 2 Qiu being like, "Oh. That's cool." externally while internally doing backflips and whooping and hollering. They don't nearly have enough energy to be like that outwardly, but damn if they can't think it.

Step 3 is peak payback era with Qiu, all of that energy they didn’t have in step 2? Yeah, well, it came back tenfold. I can see them actively participating in anything the MC is doing. They're a lot more willing to get their hands dirty and try shit out. Also, they do want to give whatever they make to the MC too, regardless of how shitty it is.

#our life now and forever #qiu lin #tamarack baumann #olnf qiu #olnf tamarack #candy headcanons

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she-posts-nerdy-stuff · 11 months

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Hey!! What do you think about the recurring joke in the SOC duology, of Kaz asking a question, everyone giving answers, and usually a quip at the end? Do you think there's significance in it, or is it just a fun way to show the crows' dynamic?

Sorry if this is a stupid question.

Rule one: there are no stupid questions.

Although these conversations might seem like a relatively surface level aspect of the novels, I think that their significance is in the very way they teach us about the Crows dynamic and tell us so much about the characters. The duology’s biggest success comes from the intense vibrancy of its characters, and it’s these types of conversations that not only help us understand who they are and how they interact with each other, but also that make us laugh and therefore care about the characters all the more. Take the parallel from soc to ck about Matthias’ character development - in six of crows Kaz asks the group what the easiest way to steal a man’s wallet is, and the replies consist of “gun to the back” from Jesper, “knife to the throat” from Inej, and “poison in his cup” from Nina, before Matthias cuts them off and says “you’re all horrible” then in crooked kingdom Kaz asks where the group think he spent the money Pekka gave them for the sale of the Crow Club and 5th harbour, getting “guns” and “ships” amongst his answers and after a pause Nina says to Matthias “this is the part where you tell us how awful we are” but he simply replies “they all seem like practical choices”. This tells us so much about the characters and how they think!!! In the first instance, we don’t yet know the characters very well, so it’s important that we begin to associate the guns with Jesper and the knives with Inej, as well as understand that Nina works with subtle but violent tactics. We learn from this brief interaction that they’ve reached a point in their lives where murder or threatening murder is the easiest way out in every option, and we’ve also arguably learned that they are eager to please Kaz because they are all instantly searching for the answer that will impress him even though he’s sure to just continue on and explain his own thought anyway. We also have no response from Wylan, if I remember correctly at least, which shows the time it takes for him to mesh with the group and his heightened anxiety at the start of the first book. In the Crooked Kingdom interaction, we have a clear transition in Inej’s character from the association of her and knives to the association of her and her dream, a ship and crew of her own, and I’m pretty sure Wylan does reply in that one so it shows his personal progression and how he’s been able to mesh with the group and because more comfortable in his own skin. Matthias’ character development between the two is more obvious and openly commented on in the conversation, but what’s also interesting is that Kaz is there both times with a genuine answer and explanation. Even though he never seems the last to enjoy a joke or quip, when he’s discussing his plans Kaz almost entirely loses the ability to think beyond the job; everything is entirely black and white and categorised by whether it’s relevant, which means it’s what he’s saying, or inessential, meaning what the others are saying.

And what’s possible even more interesting is that you can see this in almost every one of these interactions Leigh Bardugo loves to include (and we love her for, of course). For example, in one of my favourites of these little formulas Kaz asks the group if they know what Van Eck’s biggest problem is. The responses are “no honour” (Matthias), “rotten parenting skills” (Nina), and “receding hairline” (Jesper). This never fails to make me smile; Matthias’ is so quintessentially himself, everything he values and such good summary of why he would be so willing to support anyone, even these thugs and thieves, against Van Eck, Nina’s showcases her dark humour and protective nature, her hatred for Van Eck is sourced far more in his treatment of Wylan and Inej than anything else, and Jesper’s is funny, witty, a genuine ongoing joke (such as Nina thinking that Wylan may need to invest in a hood tonic when she meets Van Eck) and just emphasises his sharp-wit as well as showing growth beyond the desperate need to impress Kaz that he harboured for so long before he properly got to know Wylan. But Kaz’s reply is simply returning to the job, stating that Van Eck’s problem is that he has “too much to lose” and that he revealed exactly how to destroy him by bragging about Alys and their unborn child.

I hope this made sense, it can be hard to tell whether I’ve actually translated my thoughts into the right words haha. Thanks so much for your question!!

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lokiondisneyplus · 8 months

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The good news is that Loki has been able to find some familiar faces at the Time Variance Authority — and they recognize him, too! The bad news? He can’t stay in one place for very long because his entire body is constantly being sucked through time and space across The Multiverse due to a pretty painful-looking phenomenon called “Time Slipping.” Didn’t think it could happen in the walls of the TVA? Well, think again, because it’s happening to Loki.

The second season of Marvel Studios’ Loki kicks off with the God of Mischief trying to get a grip, literally, on the timeline as he struggles to stay in one place long enough to have an actual conversation with Mobius. Unfortunately, because Loki has been thrust across The Multiverse timelines repeatedly, he keeps popping in and out of places, both past, present, and future as he races to not only steady himself but also keep the TVA from imploding from an overloading Temporal Loom, too. Just another day at the office, huh?

“Loki is having a problem which is that he’s in space, but he’s not rooted in time. He’s essentially glitching and being involuntarily molecularly disassembled between different points,” Returning star Tom Hiddleston explains. “It’s incredibly disorienting because he doesn’t know where he is or which time he’s in and it becomes like a mystery or a riddle that he’s got to solve. Why is this happening to me?”

Essentially, as Hiddleston jokes, Loki’s “had a really, really bad day and the day is getting worse.”

Though it looks scary on-screen, don’t worry, Hiddleston isn’t really getting torn apart molecule by molecule. As he explains, “This is where I’m embarrassed to say that in my limited carpet bag of physical abilities, I can’t in fact Time Slip.” However, the actor did commit to making Time Slipping look as painful as possible for the camera, constantly contorting his body to create uncomfortable situations, at one point considering using actual ropes and cables on wires to move his body in different ways.

“Tom is one of the most, if not the most, dedicated performer I've ever seen” Executive Producer Kevin Wright explains. “It wasn't that it wasn't painful in the script. We knew what, functionally, it was doing in the story. As everybody starts to get in the room, you have to start having those conversations of what is this? How do we see it on screen? What does it become? It kind of came about just through Tom's process.”

Hiddleston got maybe a little too into the process of Time Slipping. “I’ll do different variations of being spun into or spun out or ripped away from or pulled into reality.” He continues. “I’ve found that trying to put my own body under tension is strange to do. Your body doesn’t want to be under stress, it wants to be comfortable but that feeling of as if you’re being twisted out of alignment like a piece of elastic tor tearing and ripping, that’s the hard thing.”

All of this would eventually be sent to VFX to mesh it all together, and as Wright explains, Hiddleston, “Took it upon himself to be like, I want to be every single element in that VFX. So, if he's slipping, it’s the character conceptually being in six different places at once. He wanted to play all six of those performances, and then VFX will stitch them together.”

The countless takes of Time Slipping were worth it, though, because “It gave VFX and sound and everybody stuff to work with, where it's just making it even more gruesome and pulling tendons.” Wright adds. “You have all these elements of vocals, the stretching, bones cracking. We'd turn them up and turn them down, depending on the slip. But it was more about making it a bespoke performance, each one of those slips.”

Hiddleston praises VFX crew working behind-the-scenes on Loki who made the Time Slipping look seamless, removing certain frames, and adding them in a quick succession so it really looks like his body is being ripped apart. “A kind of very intense visual effects sandwich,” he jokes, “I take my hat off to the visual effects team for helping me out because it’s been a more physical [process] than I thought it was going to be.”

Editor’s note: The following interview was conducted before the SAG-AFTRA strike began on July 14, 2023.

#tom hiddleston #time slipping #loki s2

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kazukazuhas · 1 year

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˗ˏˋ ꒰ 💌 ꒱ old friends, lloyd garmadon.┊ ˚➶ ｡˚ ☁️

˗ˏˋ ꒰ 💌 ꒱ act one ;; scene five┊ ˚➶ ｡˚ ☁️

୧ ⎯⎯ GREEN NINJA

୧ ⎯⎯ WARNINGS ;; some stalking ;; alluding to robbery and possible murder ;; some injures ;; lloyd being a cute dude ;; reader has anxiety and not have that strong of a will to live

୧ ⎯⎯ NOTES ;; who knew that i would forget to included the other main character for a little bit. i tried to write anxiety to the best of my ability, but i'm tired af rn

୧ ⎯⎯ PREVIOUS ┊MASTERLIST┊NEXT

୧ ⎯⎯ 1 IMAGE ;; TEXT [CLICK FOR BETTER QUALITY]

maybe this was a bad idea: coming to the store by yourself without anyone else to accompany, to chase away and ease your nerves. anxiety began to rack its thin finger against your heart as the car parked off to the side of the pavement. nya checked her phone quickly, angling the screen just short of out of your sight but you don't bother about what she's busy with both out of decency and being out of it.

the car's safety tried to call you back, singing a song of comfort as you reluctantly stepped out of the vehicle to complete your own tasks of the day. nya, while in the midst of your worrying and fastening breath hidden behind the disposable mask you grabbed, mentioned something you don't quite understand entirely from the slightly deafness you felt but nonetheless the least go along with it as she starts the car, waves and finally drove off to her own destination. maybe you should've let pixal when she offered to accompany you– well too bad it's too late now.

it's quick, you think to yourself to reassure the panic from settling in, a simple in and out. all you needed was a few things and you'd be out in a jiff, and the house was nothing but a good ten minutes away– you choose to believe that it is near instead of its realistic distance being further rather than closer. you hesitantly step inside the small convenience store, counting all the heads you see before walking around the side of the aisles to find the one you needed exactly.

relief flooded you like a thin stream of mist, the bell rang as the last person and their child, who was half embarrassed by their mother, left the store while bidding a rather noisy goodbye to the clearly tired cashier, who only rolled their eyes before continuing on with their own personal work. you pick the things you need up quickly, checking their prices quickly before grabbing a pack of some ramen you liked and a few energy drinks from one of the neatly packed fridges. skylor did say they normally restocked the night before saturday. with a good attempt, you tried to seem calm while walking up to the cashier.

they greeted you softly, still in their own haze of thought and daydreaming when you get to them after a quick moment. they half-smiled before continuing on with their job, taking each of the items from your short list and cashing them. their calm energy radiated and softened your nerves for a moment. they were just someone no older than you, mostly fresh out of high school and maybe even trying to make ends meet? or they were trying to earn enough to cover the cost of university or college, you couldn't tell.

it was something so fascinating about the whole — outside a single perspective, were the interesting lives of thousands of millions to billions, all filling the pages of their books with ink crafted to them in their own unique writing.

they handed you the bagged items and slip after they received the cash you handed back to them, letting out a small farewell greeting and going back to their own work and continuing on with their day. never caring of whether it was the last time you'd see them or if this was just the first.

but your mind was at ease– maybe you were hyper fixated by anxiety thumping against your head at first but it ceased, at least until you made it halfway down the road. something warned you, a gut feeling that meshed with anxiety and worry that told you to turn back and call someone to pick you up. your heart picked up the pace the faster you began to walk, your breath left you in a heave and pant.

regrettably, you spare a look behind you.

nothing.

the anxiety rushes forward, sending your nerves on an electrified run the moment the presence lurking after your steps vanishes from your sights and senses. it crashed roughly and flooded rationality, but you kept the fast pace and reframed from breaking out into a desired sprint back to skylor's place.

the steps became loudly, your sometimes false suspicion was now correct; someone was following you and not so discreetly. from the sound of the footsteps, they were heavy and following your exact direction you were heading. and you doubt they were of good intentions.

"fuck– please go away," you whispered under your breath, the only person who would have only heard was yourself, but you heard the desperation and fear that something might happen.

if only you were in shape, it's been forever since your last workout or try to keep yourself fit and in good health. since your high school career started coming to a close in your last couple years, it swiped you of any energy and time you had left outside your preexisting tuitions and classes. sometimes you wonder how you were still standing when you didn't have any of those energy drinks.

there was a drunken snicker from behind you, warily you glance back and catch the sight of a stranger watching you walk at a fastened pace with the utmost interest and caution.

you turned, a wrong one by your misjudgement and settling panic rising further than before. you notice you're panting slightly at how your body is coming to terms with how hard its work to keep you moving. vaguely you noticed the mistake you made, you were supposed to take the turn after. and it might cost you gravely.

your skin itches, a crawling feeling stretches up your arm and it becomes unreal how disgusting you begin to feel the moment the stranger grabs your arm. they grabbed you— it takes a moment to register that they managed to get a hold on you, but now your back hits the hard wall with a thud that rings heavy against the street's bare, lonely walls. the pain cracks through your body, a thick hurt fleet from your back and along your body with a burning touch. that's a faint sound of the contents from your run earlier meeting the ground, its vague against the loud ringing echoing in your hazy mind.

the stranger asks of something from you, their face blurry with the sky and wall meshing together. they ask a second time, louder and much clearer but it still didn't reach your hazy mind.

silver, no. a shiny grey moved from side to side in your sight, it was getting hard to see from your hazing eyes and tiredness getting to you. nothing seemed real at the moment, maybe your head hit the wall as well– oh that could be a concussion.

there was yelling, there was someone else who caught the attention of the stranger who thought of taking advantage of your half conscious state to take your hard earned cash, maybe something darker, death. it would be fine if the latter had occurred, you think. you close your eyes reluctantly.

"hey, hey–" the other stranger called to you, the one who chased the other one off. you found their clothing funny, all clad in green and black with a hood and mask hiding their face from everyone. "what's your name? can you tell me?" you tried to focus on their voice, the stranger sounded as young as you. you answered them with your name, fading from consciousness for a moment. their voice brought you back, "do you know who i am?" you shook your head as much as you could manage to, resting your face in the hand they held it, your face with.

"i'm the green ninja." ninja? so they were real?

"gonna pick you up- okay there we go. i'm going to take you to the hospital, do you have an emergency contact?" the ninja asks slowly, letting you process each word before saying the next. they wait patiently but not saying a word, but kept moving, you don't notice the rooftops and breeze until you reopen your eyes.

"skylor chen." the ninja chuckles, seemingly knowing of who to call. they quietly thank you for the answer before jumping to the next rooftop and onwards until finally reaching the hospital.

haze. haze all you felt.

you all but remember that day, except you'll remember the person in the strange clothes. they were quite interesting.

୧ ⎯⎯ PREVIOUS ┊MASTERLIST┊NEXT

୧ ⎯⎯ TAGLIST ;; @spoopy-fish-writes // @spoops-inliyue ;; @decaffeinatedcloudkryptonite // @shaantiofher ;; @sunangelstears ;; @comicbookweirdo ;; @cl0udyw4ter ;; @chamille-trash ;; @candy884422 ;; @rossivette // [pm/send in an ask to join]

˗ˏˋ ꒰ 💌 ꒱ kazukazuhas copr. 2023 darling┊ ˚➶ ｡˚ ☁️

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howtofightwrite · 2 years

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Why don't you just stop responding to the sexists who think women can't fight men???

Three reasons.

One is a little self serving, so let's start with that: Those posts do really well.

I'm not kidding; slapping around MRAs consistently land among our more popular posts. This has certainly been true of our recent posts, but it's a long term factor as well. In fact, Women are not Weaker than Men is the blog's most popular post by a huge margin, (it has somewhere around 24k-25k notes.) (Ironically, our most popular at this moment is the Kim Possible post from a couple weeks ago.)

Second, and this might be surprising, but sometimes they meet our criteria. So, I've talked about this before, but when I'm looking in the inbox, I generally evaluate a question based on it's general applicability, educational value, and its potential for entertainment.

With general applicability, I'm asking myself if the answer will be useful to other people. If the answer to this is no, it's very rare that I'll answer that question. The most common questions that run afoul of this are hyper-specific scenarios, questions about very specific fantasy or alien physiology (if you sent us an ask about your six limbed, arboreal, aliens, I'm sorry, that question is probably not happening.) Even in cases like this, I'll sometimes try to find ways to see if I can offer an answer that will be more broadly useful. Sometimes, you'll see questions where I veer off onto a tangent, or try to drag a larger context out of something, and this would usually be why.

With educational value, I'm asking if I can explain something that most people don't know. This will sometimes override applicability. I'll admit that sometimes I'm a bit too harsh on point, especially if it's something we've covered in the past. I don't want to get into a situation where I'm answering the same topics repeatedly, because I don't want to waste your time, though, thinking about it critically, there's probably a few of these where the answer is old enough that most of our audience didn't catch them the first time. The recent hair whip and knives questions are examples where I reasoned that the previous posts were old enough that fresh answers would be useful again.

The entertainment factor is basically self-explanatory. I don't usually set out with the goal of writing jokes, but if I see the opportunity...

Now, with a lot of these MRA posts, there's some real potential for entertainment right off the top. These tend to be poorly considered arguments, and as a result, tend to be really easy to shoot down. That, in turn, means I've got a lot of room to be particularly snarky, or to ramp the interest in some of the background information.

Third, you need to hear this.

Okay, in this case, it might not be you, per se. However, you need to hear this. It is depressingly common to see authors, even women, buy into the MRA's bullshit. Far too many accept the, “women can't fight,” lie as their truth.

This yields shitty writing.

Far too many authors, when writing their female characters, say, “but mine is different, she can fight.” These authors produce weaker characters, because they take painful, artificial, steps to keep their character from offending these misogynists.

When you step back and say, “my character is a girl, and she can fight because she has superpowers,” you are doing a disservice to your readers. You're perpetuating that myth and reinforcing it. For a new generation of girls, you're telling them that they can't fight, because of a lie you took as fact.

There is a purpose to standing up and saying, “this is wrong,” and detailing the multitude of ways that it simply doesn't mesh with objective reality, but here's one reason you should take with you: Participation.

Make no mistake, the goal of those misogynists is to diminish you, to push you to the side, and squelch your voice. Remember when that anon wrote, “One punch could end your life.” That's not an argument about the ability for men or women to function in combat, that is intended to be threatening. Joke's on them, I'm a guy. But, never forget, the people forwarding these arguments want you to sit down, shut up, and wait meekly, while they decide your life for you. And they intend to enforce this with violence, or threats of same.

Do you know what determines an individual's capacity for violence?

Socialization.

As a society, we lie to girls. We tell them they cannot fight. We tell them they shouldn't fight, and if that was applied agnostic of sex, that would be one thing. However, while we are telling girls to submit, we are teaching boys to be more aggressive. To engage in violence. We teach them to fight, and accept it as a legitimate arbiter of disputes (on the playground.)

So, when you see one of these misogynists, what you're really seeing is one of those scared little boys on the preschool playground, who has no way to exert control over their environment except through violence. Their body got larger, but they never grew up.

As an adult, they understand that violence has consequences, so they start with threats, and then transition into force.

So, do you know what determines an individual's capacity for violence?

Because socialization isn't permanent. It shapes how you look at the world, but your socialization is something you can control. This is a power you have over yourself. If you live in a world where you are exclusively told that you cannot fight, that you cannot defend yourself, that you must meekly wait for someone else to take your autonomy from you, you will believe that. So long as the only voices you hear speak that lie, you cannot change.

The difference between being able to fight, or not, is training. It's your willingness to use that training on another human being, versus your opponent's ability to do the same. It doesn't matter if you are a man, or a woman. What matters is, do you know how to reduce your opponent into 200lbs of rapidly decaying meat, and are you willing to do it to protect yourself?

Here's another lie you don't hear countered very often: “strength matters.” Humans, as a general rule, use a fraction of our physical strength. This is true for both men and women. Your muscles are literally strong enough to tear your own body apart. Your brain (not your mind, but your brain) limits how hard you push yourself, specifically to protect you from your own body. One side effect of adrenaline is that it becomes very easy to accidentally hurt yourself because you will override your body's own limiters. In case it's unclear, what I'm saying here is that, when threatened, it is quite possible to temporarily give yourself superhuman strength. Now, it will hurt in the morning, and I may be biased, but I think abused muscles, and even broken bones, are far more appealing than being autopsied.

So, why do I continue to speak out against these misogynists? Because they're full of shit. They can't tell me what to do. They can't tell you what to do. The only power they have over you is what you surrender to them.

I'm telling you: You can fight. It's not easy. It's a skill like any other, and it requires training. Just like any other skill you can have excellent teachers or poor ones. But, you can fight.

Humans are a scary species, and when provoked we are a lot harder to kill, and a lot more dangerous, than we appear. If you think that our sexual dimorphism is significant enough to change that, it's not. It's not even close.

You can fight.

And those misogynists can go fuck themselves.

-Starke

This blog is supported through Patreon. Patrons get early access to new posts, and direct access to us through Discord. If you’d like to support us, please consider becoming a Patron.

#Starke answers #writing advice #writing reference #writing tips

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leafsheep · 2 days

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I think Signal should have to work with Team Dark. Not like permanently but I just think that it would be a really funny scenario if some serious level threat magic user shows up in Gotham and Bruce after much struggle and swallowing of his pride reluctantly has to call them and bc Signal’s a meta who actually has abilities that can mesh well with magic he ends up being like a liaison with them.

Like first of all he’s already pretty annoyed because come on Bruce why tf does he have to babysit but he ALSO has to work with a man who’s powers come from a shiny metal helmet, a woman who’s magic spells are literally just normal sentences backwards (he’s not serious Zatanna he’s sorry he would never disrespect you please <-apology Steph forced him to make), a chain smoker Brit with no apparent reason or will to be there half the time, a guy who’s name is RAGMAN (seriously RAGMAN?), a rhyming demon, and a literal chimpanzee detective.

There definitely is potential for amusement with other bats but I think Duke is perfect because he’d spend the whole time either unapologetically judging the group or making jokes and I just feel like it would be great.

#dc comics #duke thomas #signal dc #dc universe #justice league #justice league dark #john constantine #zatanna zatara #detective chimp #etrigan #jason blood #khalid nassour #doctor fate #ragman #rory regan

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yourgirlniki · 4 months

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Jackie and Wilson

"For whatever poor soul is coming next"

Johnny "Soap" MacTavish x f!reader

3k words

Tags!: No use of y/n, fluff, down bad Johnny MacTavish, not completely canon accurate Soap, first fic! 😎👍

A/N: This is based on Hozier's song Jackie and Wilson - I'm thinking I want this to be the beginning of a collection of one-shots based on his songs, depending on my free time! But again, first fic so please any comments would be greatly appreciated! Was nervous to post but ya only live once Hope you enjoy!

The cushion on the back of the booth wasn’t the most comfortable thing ever. The deep red bump didn’t do much to help an aching back, more of a thing that somewhat fixed the posture of those who sat at it. But who goes to a bar for comfort anyway? Dingy bars aren’t the first place most people would think to go back to after nearly dying halfway across the world.

The sticky floors, the mesh of posters and old mementos hanging on the brick walls. The neon lights, the potent smell- its headache inducing and you don't even have a hangover yet. And there are too many people in here, crowding pool tables and the small dance floor, (if you can even call it that), to be called someplace one would go to calm down and relax.

This is a fact that is true for most people.

But most people aren’t military. Even fewer are SAS.

And absolutely none are John MacTavish.

The man who idolizes the chaotic ways of the world above all else. That’s what has him still in the job quite frankly. The chaos, the ability to live and thrive in an insane environment. For someone like him, these things never truly bothered him. In an odd sense, the smell of alcohol, sweat and far too many bad ideas feel closer to home than he’s been in a few months. A comfort that most don't understand. But he does.

So even as exhaustion tries to take hold, the scott wears a signature giddy smile, adds a seemingly impossible pep to his step, and he drags the 141 into a back table, somehow always energetic. Even after practically wasting away in a desert for the past 3 months, he has energy. It’s honestly absurd.

Even worse is that he always finds a way for that energy to become contagious. As much as his teammates joke and grumble about it, Johnny was their way of restoration, to push forward. He would choose a shitty bar, and even shittier alcohol over a quiet apartment or the pile of paperwork that had to get done at some point. And so, the boys would too. Even if they hid it behind the facade of “babysitting” the grown man.

So now, here they sat, against the trashy cushions, with crappy music, in the dimly lit bar, with smiles and a sense of belonging. They call it a “celebration” of a mission well done, a nod to their success. Definitely not an excuse to just drink the night away, to get the mission out of their heads for a bit. To laugh with comrades and just be… domestic? Is that right? Close enough.. Yeah? Finding their small slot back into normal society.

Don’t get him wrong, Johnny loves his job. Loves what he does, but who doesn’t want to just have a drink at a bar with his mates every once and a while? And that's why he has his third beer in his hand and is snorting and a story Gaz is telling about one of his most recent hookups. A lady who was.. “Bloody crazy! I mean it. Seemed nice at first but don't be fooled, she was insane!”

Yeah, this is home. It’s where he belongs, where he wants to belong, he thinks. With his men, in the middle of nowhere chatting about anything and everything. Confiding in and teasing each other. He trusts them with his life, he can trust them to listen when need be. And yet… there is always that ache. The strange pull in moments like these like something is still missing. It’s been happening more often lately. And it's like an itch Johnny can't scratch. A puzzle piece he can't find but is still absent mindedly searching for. The only issue is he doesn't know what it is, that it just- isn't.

The chatter fades to a muffled sound in the scotts ears for a moment as he lets out a small, genuine smile looking at his group, sipping at the drink in his hand as his forearms lay themselves on the table, hands clasping. Taking a moment to truly thank whatever may be pulling the strings. Bringing him and his boys to safety. And maybe even a small prayer to tell him what the odd nagging in his brain is about. He takes a breath and relaxes, just for a moment. Looking around the bar, truly just admiring the world around him, the bustle of it all, the people with their own lives and ambitions.

How was he supposed to know that was a fatal mistake on his part?

He couldn’t. He didn’t.

He found out a second to late, registered it after he knew he was done for. It was one moment, a mistake, a pause, that would stick with him for as long as it dared. It was a magnet, an invisible force that pulled his very being toward it. The moment he nearly drooled his drink out from his now slack jaw.

Because when his eyes connect with the woman walking through the door, he swears time stopped.

Suddenly, the crappy bar didn’t smell as bad, the music wasn’t too loud, the cushion no longer made his back ache, the room got brighter just from her smile. The very ground shifted, and not in the drunken haze way. He warmed up, eyes wide. A thought process that if he opened them more he would see more. God, it felt like getting a cavity by now, she felt too sweet to even look at.

In a single moment the world shattered around him, everything he knew was thrown out a window, as his mind was occupied by one thought only.

It was only a moment… but by then he knew he was fucked, utterly and completely.

Fate or destiny, call it what you may. An answered prayer, an utter coincidence. It didn’t matter. The bar turned into a museum, a place to observe and admire as his eyes widened impossibly more as his head tilted watching her move. A giggle slipped under his breath as he thought he could be mistaken for Ghost at this point, with his starring.

But your pull, it was undeniable. Even the thought of looking away would cause you to vanish in a blink, never for Johnny to see again. And he couldn’t have that. Not when it was astonishing in the way you simply were.

It only got worse as your group got closer to theirs. A mere table away. When you first walked in it was a trap, a line that was cast into his pond and he was falling for the bait. Confidence is something he is used to in his line of work, but it was usually the cocky kind. The kind that made him want to kick a recruits teeth in for. But you were something different entirely. You demand attention, even if you didn't know it. A high held head, a testament to the world that you were there, and you were aware of it. Thank god it was his attention it demanded, because it was nothing short of a miracle.

The air you lived in became breathable, spreading to his little corner of the bar as he had to remind himself to actually inhale and exhale as he took in the sight over and over again. Committing it to memory. The world became a movie, a fictional place where he wasn’t. One he could only watch and revel in. It was the type that you knew was going to be good before it even began. The one you had been anticipating for and knew wouldn’t disappoint. His heart rate picked up, the same way it would in the field, but in a much less stressful manner now. Jesus, what was happening to him? You must have cursed him. That’s it. The only explanation. Bewitched by not only the view, but the melody of your laugh flooding his ears now at the closer proximity. Leaning against a standing table with a glass in hand, head slightly tilted enough that a stray hair fell to cover your face.

It was comical the way his heart sped up, watching as you chatted with your own group. Something so normal, something you see every single day, was making the big strong man’s hard race like it life or death. And he knew life or death.

Romeo had nothing on him.

Absolutely nothing in the way his brain knew he was to be yours. It had to be, he had to be. It’s how the story will be written, and he will play his role. Stealing your hear that way you have entranced his own. He wouldn’t be able to tell you when he got up. He can’t tell you how his body moved on its own, knowing what needed to be done but not conscious enough to alert his brain.

What he can tell about how perfect it felt to so much as stand there by you. Soaking in your presence was one thing, standing in it next to you was another entirely.

And that's how he found himself face to face with you, who turned to him with a puzzled look, but a kind smile.

He was a goner.

“Oh… umm- Hello, can I help you?” Is all you had to say to him to confirm his every thought. This woman could heal every wound with her voice alone. And her eyes so much as finally looking back at him felt like he was seen for the first time in his life.

“Uhh.. sir? Are you alright?” Your voice rang out again, pulling him back to reality as you hand waved in front of his face slightly. A flattering smile on our lips and your eyebrows furrowed slightly, almost concerned. What came over John MacTavish in that moment is unexplainable.

“I seem to have lost my number—can I have yours?”

Her eyebrows raised. She blinks. Then tilting her head slightly.

He could die right then and there.

Leaning against the table next to her with a stupid, crooked smile and a raised eyebrow, as if he didn't just embarrassed the hell out of himself. A pick up line? That's the best you could do, John? Really? Welp, there goes every chance you had, cut your losses and- Laughter chimed in his ears like wedding bells. And that’s when he froze, every negative thought draining him as he became light. You laugh was intoxicating more than any drink or drug. The kind that was unapologetic and genuine. The kind that has the back of your palm finding your lips as you cover your giggles, nose scrunching and eyes squinting due to the smile. One that made both of you have pink cheeks for different reasons. A joke that probably shouldn't have been laughed at, but coming from the man before you, it eased the tension in the air.

It must have been the prettiest sight Johnny had ever seen.

He doesn’t know how he did it, probably because it wasn’t him at all. Must have been pure luck that after that horrible entrance she seemed kind enough to humor him that night. He bought you a drink and hung on every word you so much as muttered in his direction. You laughed at every joke, good or bad. He made it his mission to make sure he always heard that laugh from then on. To produce it from you.

Oddly enough, it turns out you were one of few words when it came to the actual conversation. And yet it was never rude, ore quiter nature. But more like you were always listening. Every word John rambled on about you picked up, asking questions or simply nodding, expressing your thoughts in your facal expression. Because of this, it seemed like he never looked away from you either, not that it was a bother, it was strangely alright. It wasn’t judgemental, only observant.

He thought he might go buy a ticket for the lottery after you agreed to give him your number by the end of the night. He was more smitten than he’s ever been, and on the dates to follow the swooning only got worse.

Every moment with you felt exhilarating, like he found that missing piece finally after a long search. And that piece loved him back He was insufferable, always gushing about the woman he has the opportunity to take out on a date. And the dates where nothing less of spectacular. The pair was stupid like teenagers in love, but more sentimental, understanding the weight of things better. Arguments never lasted long and if they did they were cleared up before any damage was done. She understood what his job ment to him, and told him she would never make him change that about himself. It was his passion, she can share.

“Just so long as you promise to come back to me.”

And from that day forth he would make a pinky promise every time he left. He was to come home. Time passed quickly, in flashes. It felt like his life went from downtime in between missions, to missions in between downtime. His heart ached for you in the days he was gone, but he always knew he would be home. He would see you again. He found a want to live, even more now that he found his world.

And as time passed them by, he found out she was perfect in the all the ways he could dream of. Especially in the impossible task of calming him down as well. Rough mission? She already had his favorite meal ready and was soothing him over. Nightmares? She was there either on the phone or more recently next to him to hold him and run her fingers through his hair. To much energy? To rowdy? You always found a way to settle him down. His anchor. And he would do the same for her if the day presented itself.

Another plus that made it all that much more, everyone liked you.It wasn’t hard too of course, but it proved even moreso how lucky he got. His family adored you, his sisters taking you in as part of the family already, much quicker than any of his other past relationships. It made him well up with pride.

Even when he officially introduced you to the 141, it was with open arms as well. If he wasnt a unit before, he absolutely was one now. Maybe just a tad bit more annoying with his bragging but of course he brags. Those boys knew how much you were doing for him, and you knew they were keeping him safe. It was a harmony that both sides respected.

A part of him knew that even if all of those people didn’t like her, (an impossible feat if he does say so himself), nothing would change for him. You were his, he was yours. Irrevocably and absolutely. If the world didn’t want them, the world wasn’t for them. Simple as that. Life became sweeter, dreamlike as he fell into a comfortable rhythm. It was almost unbelievable, no, it was unbelievable.

One day, as he was laying on the couch, laying gently on you, nearly dozing off. Then he felt your hand on his shoulder, a soft pat that made him stir but not move as he hummed in response. “Johnny?” You said, soft enough that he had to stir slightly closer to your voice. But he didn’t look up, kept his heavy eyes shut as he mumbles a small “what?”

“Earth to Johnny..” Hmm, that's odd. It mde him sit up the slightest bit more. Must have been laying on his ear wrong, your voice sounded weird. And another pat on his shoulder, a bit harder this time.

“MacTavish!”

And then he blinked. He was sitting up straight, eyes wide as he made eye contact with his Captain across from him, in the same place he left him at the bar. The bar? His cheek stung from the movement of no longer resting on… his palm? His? No that’s not right. His head hurt slightly as the smell of bar flooded his nose. What was he doing in a-

“Soap, you alright? You were out for a bit. Staren’ at nothing.” Gaz said with a smile, slightly concerned.

He looked around, baffled as he took in the same dingy bar he had met you in. In fact in the same spot exactly, same clothes, same drink. Hold on, that can't be right. His head swung back around as he took in the table next to them was, empty. Bottles and cups discarded to the side, napkins crumpled. He heard the bar door shut as his eyes flicked over and spotted the same woman walk away outside, smiling the same as she was before. Only then did it make sense.

His mind filled in the blanks for him as he rubbed his face with a groan. When something is too good to be true, it's probably because it is. Gaz was patting his back as Ghost and Price shared a look that had Price hiding a smirk. But it didn’t matter to Johnny.

What mattered was she’d already left.

The boys decided that's where the night should end, Johnny's head almost embarrassingly hung low as they paid their bill and called a car to take them back to base. This is the first time Scott has sulked in a while, running his hands through his mohawk as he kicked himself for being so stupid. Caught up in a daydream of a random woman at the bar, what a stupid fantasy to get caught in. he was practically mourning something he doesn't even have, never did have. And now something he wouldn’t have either.

The moment changed his life for sure, a memory of fake memories that will haunt his little brain every once in a while when he's bored and remembers this night.

#john mactavish x reader #john soap mactavish #cod #cod x reader #new fic #first fic #cod mw2 #soap cod #soap x reader

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