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iateyourparents · 5 months

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could you please do a jake imagine where the reader is in a band but is really timid on camera please ? <3

pretty girl | j.w.

pairing: jake webber x fem!reader

summary: you’re nervous before recording a music video and your boyfriend is there to help you.

warnings: bad writing and grammar(i’m sorry, english isn’t my first language), not proofread

an: thank you! hope you like it <33

pictures are from pinterest:)

You were nervous. Only thing stopping you from walking out of this room was Jake holding you in his arms.

You weren’t a shy person, not in real life anyway. But something about cameras was making you unsure. What if you won’t have any good takes? Or what if you mess up, nobody will notice and people will see you doing something weird?

Just thinking about all possible fails made you want to cry.

“Calm down love. I can hear a river of your thoughts in your head from here.” Jake whispered into your ear.

You were together with Jake since before you and your three close friends decided to give being a band shot, so they all knew Jake and knew he wouldn’t disturb or distract anyone while you all would be recording your music video.

They also knew, if he wouldn’t be here, you probably would walk out of the room the minute you saw the set and all the cameras there. He was like your emotional support dog.

He was your emotional support boyfriend.

“What if…” you wanted to list all of the possibilities how you could mess up but Jake shushed you with a kiss.

“No what if. You’re great, beautiful and you will do better than just fine. It will come out like a one big slay.” he assured you “You’re my pretty girl, there’s no other possibility than you being just perfect.”

You sighed but felt nice warm and butterflies in your stomach. His words actually helped and his tight hug made you feel so much better.

“Alright, are we ready to start?” the producer walked into the room clapping his hands. You looked nervously in your boyfriend’s eyes but he only smiled encouragingly and left a quick kiss on your nose before lightly pushing you towards your bandmates.

You actually felt calmer than before and with steady footsteps you walked onto the set and you took your place on the set. Some workers gave you a diary and a pen so you could pretend to be writing something.

In some other parts of music video you were all in a ‘garage’ practicing. You were a lead singer so you were standing in front of everyone and that made you kinda nervous but Jake sitting in the back of the room with big proud smile, looking at you like you were some wonder, made you feel brave.

You continued recording and it wasn’t that bad. Few times you had to ask for a break so you could go to Jake for more kisses end encouragement but other than that it all went smooth and you were quickly done with recording.

“Alright guys, you did amazing.” producer smiled at all four of you “Remember to be here tomorrow 12 am straight. We have to record the song so we can add it to the video!” he reminded and after saying your goodbyes you all went to the dressing room where Jake was already waiting with your jacket.

“You did so good baby!” he looked like an excited kid getting his dream toy and you could feel a blush tinting your cheeks.

“You think so?”

“Absolutely!” he nodded vigorously “And you looked so hot.” You laughed but thanked him and then you pulled him into a kiss.

“Thank you for being here and being my emotional support boy.”

“I can be your emotional support boy whenever you want, pretty girl.” he kissed the side of your head “Ready to go eat something?”

#jake webber x reader #jake webber #jake #johnnie guilbert #tarayummy #tara yummy #sam and colby #snc #sam golbach #colby brock #music #band

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strawnarrries · 10 months

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because im sad about the last show, here's a little imagine about y/n and harry reminiscing the past two years the night before the last show :(

warnings: mentions of sex but nothing graphic

Your eyes fluttered open and you realized it was still dark outside, a sign that it was not quite morning just yet. You're not sure why you woke up. It was like your body knew something was off because when you turned over, the bed was empty beside you.

Rubbing your eyes to clear the sleepy haze, you noticed light coming from under the closed door of the bedroom in the villa you and Harry are staying in. Getting up out of bed, you opened the door and the sudden change in lighting burned your eyes. After getting used to it, you walked towards the kitchen and spotted your husband, leaning up against the counter, sipping on something inside of a mug.

“Harry?” you hummed, walking up to him.

“Oh hey, did I wake you up? I’m sorry," he looked up at you with doe eyes and messy hair sticking up in every direction.

“What are you doing?”

“Can’t sleep.”

You popped your bottom lip out and wrapped your arms around his bare waist, his instinctively wrapping around yours after setting his mug on the counter, “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, I just can't believe the last show's tomorrow night.”

“Aw, I know. You wanna talk about it?” you hummed, looking up at him with tired eyes.

"I'm gonna miss it. A lot," he whispered, "but at the same time I'm excited for a long break."

"It's bittersweet."

"Yeah," he nodded.

"It's gonna be weird not getting to watch you on stage every night in your sparkly outfits."

He chuckled softly, "You don't get those outfits at home, do ya?"

"No, I get you either naked or in the one stupid shirt that you refuse to throw away even though it's practically in shreds."

"Thought you loved that shirt?" he teased.

You glared up at him before changing the subject, "What'dya think you'll miss the most? Just being on stage?"

"Yeah. Performing. It's one of my favorite things in the world to do. I just get such a rush from being out there and interacting with the fans and hearing them scream my lyrics."

"And hearing them bark at you," you added.

He giggled, "Yes, that too."

"You'll be back though. It's not the end."

“You're right. I feel like this tour was just special for some reason, I dunno. I fear I’m gonna get really emotional tomorrow on stage though. I was holding back tears at the show the other night," he chuckled.

“It’s okay to get emotional. You know me and your mom will be sobbing the entire night."

He smiled softly as he cupped your jaw and rubbed his thumb back and forth across your cheek, "I've been reflecting a lot recently. So much has happened in the last two years. It's wild."

“You've done, like what, 150 shows?”

“169 tomorrow."

“Holy shit, Harry. Most of them were completely sold out too. Do you realize how incredible that is?”

“It's mad. I think this has been the most successful tour I’ve ever been on.”

“Oh, by far.”

“Gonna miss seeing everyone every day. Gonna miss the fans and being up on stage. I've had some of the best shows of my life on this tour.”

“Harryween,” you giggled fondly at the memory that popped into your head.

“That was fun as fuck,” he giggled back.

“You’ve done more than just tour though. So many award shows, Coachella, music videos, you starred in two different movies, Harry.”

“I have,” he nodded, smiling proudly at himself, "Looking back, the amount of love and support that I've gotten from everyone, the fans, my team, my friends, and family, and from you is just - it's - it's so overwhelming like I can't even explain it to you. Like my mind can't comprehend that this is my life. Been 13 years and I still can't believe it."

"'cause you deserve it, baby. With the amount of love you give out and just the type of person you are in general, you deserve everything that's come your way. Have I ever told you how proud of you I am?" you teased, being the fact that those words leave your lips multiple times after every single one of his accomplishments.

"Never. Not once," he chuckled.

“Well, I am,” you hummed pressing a sweet kiss to his sternum, just under where his cross necklace lay, "It makes me feel so prideful that I get to call you my husband."

“Thank you, my love. You know I wouldn't be here without you.”

You rested your head on his warm chest, hugging him tighter, embracing the sweet silence before breaking it, "Can I be honest with you?”

He nodded as you looked back up at him.

“I know it's selfish but a big part of me is excited that it’s over because then I get you all to myself and don’t have to share you with the world.”

“Finally don’t have to hear you nagging for my attention all the time,” he chuckled.

“Heyyyyyy,” you whined.

“I’m joking, baby.”

You rolled your eyes teasingly.

“We have a lot to look forward to.”

“Like what?” he asked, although he knew exactly what you were referencing to, he just wanted to hear you say it.

“You becoming a daddy.”

“Really lookin forward to that. I can’t wait ‘till you have a cute little baby bump.”

“Gotta get me pregnant first.”

"You don't gotta worry 'bout that. We’re gonna be goin' at it all day every day when we’re on holiday next month,” he smirked.

“I can't even explain to you how excited I am for that. Vacation Harry is my favorite Harry."

He grinned, “I love you, Y/N."

“I love you too.”

He leaned down and pressed his lips to yours for a few sweet kisses before you hummed sleepily, “Will you come back to bed with me now?”

“Yeah, c’mon.”

#harry styles #harry styles imagine #harry #harry imagine #harry fanfic #harry fanfiction #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #one direction #one direction fanfic #one direction fanfiction #one direction imagine #hslot #fluff #harry fluff #one direction fluff #harry styles fluff

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pansear-doodles · 1 year

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-> Pansear ; any pronoun ; genderfluid bisexual (taken) ; Neurodivergent ; 21 ; April 9 ; Local Filipino

-> GAD and MDD (Please be patient with me, thank you)

-> If I blocked you(usually because you blocked me first or because I thought your account was a bot) and you wish to be unblocked, please lmk on an alternate account or friend.

Welcome to my blog. There's lots of important stuff under keep reading. So if you care and have the time, do read.

-> Hello. I'm Pansear. I have done stupid shit but also cool shit, and stupid cool shit. My stupid shit don't mean I'm being malicious- I think most of the time I was just silly or very emotional about it. I really like to draw, play specific video games, and enjoy animated content like movies and cartoons. I think animals are cool, plants are cool, sharks and aquatic creatures are cool, and for some reason I really like vending machines (I think they are exciting). I like to make food and eat them, and even draw them. I like video game music and music with guitars and bass in them. I really like plushies and collect those of my favorite characters.

-> Oh and speaking of Favorite characters... They're my blorbos alright and sometimes I accidentally project onto them. These blorbos include: Werewolf Cookie (Cookie Run), Legoshi (Beastars; look I even share birthdays with him!), Nick Wilde (Zootopia), Plague Knight (Shovel Knight), Artificer and Hunter (Rain World), Ichimatsu Matsuno (Osomatsu-san), Foxy the Pirate (FNAF), Pinkie Pie (MLP), Spamton (Deltarune), and a bunch of goth/edgy backstory and generally edgy/tired old men from Pokemon like Nanu and Larry. I could go on more but just know that if the character looks like they deserve some sort of hug, 90% of the time they're likely my most favorite character.

-> A troubled person trying to get by in college. Currently seeking therapy and found support with many lovely individuals (my friends!) and making some form of progress to fix myself. My primary form of coping is drawing and making stories where the characters fight similar struggles as mine (They are essentially my Earthbound Flying Men). This is one of the reasons why I make a lot of art and draw fast- It is not to chug out content- I just draw fast and a lot. Well... I used to draw fast, but with the advice of many, I'm taking it easy.

-> I also like to play video games and listen to music repeatedly until I get bored to help cheer me up. I do not want to go into detail about my trauma and its details and progression shouldn't be everyone's priority to know. I'm here in the internet to have fun and maybe earn incentives along the way, and whenever I get tired, I dock out until I feel better.

-> I'm not looking for attention, especially those that spout negativity. Let me know of anything that concerns you and don't be afraid to be honest. I don't want to hurt people, but I will bite if prompted or cornered. I apologize if my episodes do leak out and cause worries, and I apologize that I may go on manic, narcissistic and overzealous tangents at times. It may be hard to control my emotions, but it doesn't excuse it.

-> Most things I say are gender neutral and loose. Don't take everything too seriously. Sometimes my distinctions in art and portrayals are not clear to people so please browse with an open mind. I also might not know certain subjects for cultural and personal reasons, so if you wish to educate me on some manners, please do- I never mean anything malicious in my work. Feel free to request tags.

-> Everyone has the right to share and use my art anywhere as long as I am credited. (there are some exceptions to this such as using them for monetary purposes or using them for malicious intent)

-> For anyone who is willing to be patient, kind, and understanding of me, thank you. You make my journey less scary. I hope it isn't weird to say "I love you" platonically, and to a stranger nonetheless! I think, even on brief times, everyone deserves a form of appreciation, especially for taking the time to read all of this, haha. I have done a lot of mistakes in the past, and people who are mature and understanding of the such are to be treasured. I truly believe it is important to know that everyone here is only human, who all went through different experiences and learning journeys, and you are only human too.

🌈Links -> Commissions CLOSED -> Support me (Ko-fi) -> Support me (Patreon) -> ✨Patreon Supporters List✨ -> Linktree -> Carrd

🌈Content Resources -> Rain World Shipping Name Masterlist (semi-outdated) -> Rain World Art Archives -> Rain World Emotes F2U -> My First Artihunter Comic -> Rain World Anthro AU Series -> Follower Contract (funny)

~Common Blog Tags and their meanings~

#my art - A majority of art I made use this tag.

#gift - Stuff made for me and sometimes for other people. Sometimes the gift comes from the creation of it, so some posts can have that too if I find that criteria.

#my anthro au, #anthro au - My Rain World Anthro AU uses these tags. The former is the new one that specifies my au in particular. The older tag is mixed in with other anthro aus people have.

#oc - Occasional posts containing my very original stuff.

#thoughts - Posts that have my random rambles. Somewhat unimportant but my mind works like that. However, since my second personal blog, these posts will be less frequent.

#rw shipping, #shipping - As most of you know, I am a shipper and I actively participate in doing it. My blog is filled with shipping content and I'm very vocal about #artihunter . This is not the only thing I do though, but if you do not wish to see it, I would tag such posts as this so people can filter them. Please lmk if I forget to tag.

#vent - This and the self harm tags used to be prevalent in this blog. I realized that these are things that shouldn't be revealed so publicly, and in front of the potentially vulnerable. This MIGHT come in rarely, but I'm hoping that not anymore from here on out. I'm sorry to those who witnessed such tags.

Occasionally, this blog may tackle sensitive and more mature topics (which would be tagged as such). This does not mean this blog is completely full of that. If you have any issue with them or if you wish for me to tag them, please let me know!

Out of everything, thank you for supporting my content and acknowledging my humanity, sincerely.

I have more to say. If you are willing to hear it.

#pin #long

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stripedwolf88 · 6 days

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The Eras Tour: Paris Night 1 (My Thoughts)

ALLLLLLLLRIGHT. So because @bettysgarden12 wanted to know my reactions and thoughts on everything that happened today, I thought I would share with the rest of yous. It's probably not going to be very in depth or analytical so fair warning on that hehe. Also this probably isn't in order of the show because my memory is trash haha.

1.First things first. The lover bodysuit. WHaT iN ThE FRiLly HeLl?!?!? I literally still don't know whether or not I dreamt of seeing that new bodysuit. Definitely, lesbian colors represented there and it was confirmed with the orange blazer she wore for The Man. It was not an accident I'm sure to have the inside be pink too.

(Side note: we all knew that The Archer was going to get cut. It actually makes a lot of sense too. I think we are past Taylor asking us to stay, not that she doesn't still hope us too. It's more like she is fine with blowing everything up now instead of focusing on the worry of messing everything up. At least I hope that is the case. We're here for ya Taylor. You got this.)

2. Second, the Fearless dress. I LOVE IT SO MUCH. I also saw that it looks really reminiscent of the original dress she wore for her Fearless tour. It's almost like she is going back to what once was.

3. Third, transitioning right into Red was something. The new Red shirt says "This is not Taylor's Version" when Red is in fact Taylor's again. Some of my moots pointed out that it could be referencing the whole Real Taylor vs Taylor The Brand theory that we as a community have been developing for quite some time. With this thinking, it would mean that the Taylor we are seeing is not someone Taylor claims as her own or something like that. It's not truly her which we all knew already.

4. Fourth, we saw a new intro for Speak Now (now officially just Enchanted since Long Live has been axed.) I don't have much to say on that other than I wasn't surprised that Long Live got cut. This cut also makes sense if we are thinking that Taylor is gonna burn it down. No more reminding about the good times or the "needing" fans to stand by her forever.

5. Fifth, combining folklore and evermore was unexpected but also not? Idk it made sense and to me it just seems like it was easier to combine them since room had to be made for TTPD.

6. Sixth, Rep was Rep. Nothing really changed from what I could tell or remember other than THE FREAKING GLASS CASES SHATTERING!!! YOU BREAK THAT GLASS CLOSET TAYLOR! WHOOP WHOOP!

7. Seventh, 1989 outfit was...something. It's just not my cup of tea visually. I DID NOT notice the lion or tiger(???) charm she had on until someone else pointed it out. Very interesting either way.

8. Eighth, putting TTPD before Midnights was an interesting choice. The whole theory that we still have to meet her at Midnight (credit to my moots for pointing this out again) is supported by this I think.

9. Ninth, the dress for TTPD is amazing!! And so are the other two outfits. The marching band uniform and it's possible reference back to ME! music video? It has me in shambles.

10. Tenth, the performance for Who Afraid of Little Old Me was visually amazing and she sang it beautifully (no surprise there) with such emotion that it was impossible for me to look away. Her levitating across the stage was also freaking awesome!

11. Next the empty cages imagery?? The nurses pulling her away from her lover??? The image of her crouching in the middle of this weird ass place??? That one really kind of freaked me out. It was eerie and heartbreaking in a way I'm not quite able to explain at this moment.

12. I was conflicted about I Can Do It With A Broken Heart both before, during, and after the performance. I had a feeling she was going to perform it and I kind of wanted her to just to hear her sing it live but then not because I knew how the fans were going to react. I really did face-palm when everyone yelled "More!" on the livestream but we all knew they were going to. The transition into ICDIWABH made me want to throw something at the TV but I also did snort on the petulance on Taylor's face for the little act. I really liked the old Hollywood theme for the visuals and the dance. It was pleasing to watch. BY THE WAY....HAVING THE OUTFIT FOR ICDIWABH ECHO HER OUTFITS ON REP IS REALLY SOMETHING. She bamboozled me again.

13. Midniiiiiiights. THE BODYSUIT IS MY FAVORITE ONE OUT OF THE ONES WE HAVE SEEN SO FAR. I'm glad that Mastermind was kept. I didn't think that she would have taken away anything from the Midnights era but if there was I had this weird concern that it would be Mastermind. Thank god my anxiety was unnecessary.

14. The surprise soooooongs~ Paris is a favorite of mine so I'm happy she played it but also of course she did. That was another predictable thing that happened. Her performance of loml was again heartfelt. She seems really happy to sing these new songs and it shows.

15. I am pretty freaking sure that the Bejeweled lights were a LOT more colorful and rainbowy than usual. Was that just me? Please tell me it wasn't just me!

Overall, it is safe to say that I was not prepared for the absolute chaos that today brought.

Taylor, it seems like you're really doing this (I reeeeeally hope that is the case) and I'm so happy for you if that is what is happening. You do you and you show us what's up. I'm looking forward to it. <3

#kaylor #gaylor #gaylor swift #ttpd #the tortured poets department #the eras tour #paris n1

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barcalover86 · 10 months

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My heart can't take it 2- Pablo Gavi

The first part here - is one of my favourite fanfiction of him

Masterlist

Finally, I managed to end this one. It's been some time, and I'm sorry for the wait, but I wanted to write it in the right way and to give you a well-deserved ending. Thank you for your messages and unconditional support! I see every request of you, and seeing that you want me to write your ideas makes me the happiest! Have a nice day, love yourself, and enjoy this! Love to all of you!🫵

I couldn't answer to only one of you because it wouldn't have been fair, so I tried to mention all of you here and announce you whenever it's ready.

I've been writing this for days..

-------

'Que las noches sin ti duelen'

"How many times do we have to listen to this song, Pedri?"

"What? You don't like it?" he turned to look at his friend who was next to him in the car.

"It's not like I don't like it, I just got bored of it"

Pedri laughed.

"Are you sure that's the reason?" he teased.

"Ok, end it here" Gavi said before the two of them sat silent in the car, while the music was still on.

Pedri was taking Gavi home again after the training. It was already 5 p.m. and tomorrow, they have to do some videos about the new Barca kit, so the moment Gavi went to his house, he went directly to his bathroom to take another shower.

"Why is he showering again?" his sister questioned her mom, being concerned about her little brother. He already showered after his training in the changing room with his teammates.

Her mom remained silent until she decided to continue the conversation.

"It doesn't seem like he is good. Are you sure you don't know what happened to him?"

Of course, she knows. He's been acting weird since the night their friend groups went together on the beach. She knew that you were the reason for his sadness. She stayed with the boy all night while he was crying in her arms. He never told the reason, nor did she asked, because as his older sister, she knows when Pablo is suffering towards a girl. Although, Aurora never told their mom this thing. She respected her brother's privacy.

"No" she just answered simply, before going to her room to not continue this subject.

It was true that Pablo Gavi was showering more lately, which doesn't seem so weird until you question yourself about it. He stays hours in his bathroom.

Crying.

He hadn't seen you since that day and it had been almost 4 weeks. He missed you a lot, and he had no one to talk to. He knew that his sister would be mad at him for falling in love with her friend, who didn't even talk to him, and Pedri.. he was going to make fun of him. He had to keep it all to himself, and the emotions sometimes got him. Crying while people think that he's showering was the best idea that came into his mind. Like that, his family wouldn't hear his sobs.

He didn't eat.. not yet. Aurora started to get more concerned, so she knocked at his door.

"Mami made you some pollo con arroz, want to come down to the kitchen to eat?" she asked hoping for a positive answer.

"Maybe later, gracias"

She barely heard him, but it was enough to know that his voice wasn't his normal one.

"Estas bien, hermanito?"

"Si"

That si had to be a strong word, but it only came from his mouth as a sob.

His sister felt like someone had just broken her heart. Hearing her brother at the edge of crying was something so hurtful. Pablo was one of the sweetest guys, and he doesn't deserve anything that could make him sad.

She waited a few seconds after talking again, trying to find the perfect way to say what she wanted.

"Come here, Pablo"

"Come outside, I know you aren't showering right now. Let's meet in the kitchen in 10 minutes. You have to eat and we to talk. I'm gonna tell our parents to leave, we'll be alone."

After that, Aurora left.

She managed to find a reason for their parents to go out of the house, and when Pablo came and sat on the chair that was in front of her, her heart broke again.

His eyes were red and puffy. The boy clearly had been crying for hours!

She didn't say anything more, only went to him and hugged him. Tight. Pablo returned the hug, trying so hard not to cry in front of his older sister. He accidentally escaped some sobs, but Aurora didn't mind. She hugged him until he calmed down completely.

"You have to tell me what is happening to you, Pablo. This is something serios"

"It's nothing, Rora."

"I know you, Gavira" she said with a serious face.

"I am just scared that the next season I won't play that much" he lied

"Oh, you're getting on my nerves. I really want to help you, but if you keep lying to me, then we won't go anywhere. I won't get mad, I promise you."

"I..I really like one of your friends," he said after some time.

"Go on" she encouraged him.

"And she doesn't give me attention at all. We barely even talked, and I'm sure that she doesn't feel the same way as me. She doesn't even look at me as a friend."

"Y/n, right?"

He started to panick at the thought that she knew.

"I'm so -" he wanted to apologise until he was interrupted again.

"It's ok, Pablo. No worries, ok? It's not your fault that you like her-"

"Kinda love her," he said sadly before turning his head to another direction, afraid not to cry again.

Aurora smiled. Pablo Gavi was never this soft. He was a sweety, of course, but she never saw his little brother like that, and she kinda likes the idea of having you even closer.

"You don't have to worry about me, hermanito. Go talk more to her and I'm sure she will like you. You are a great boy, and let's be serious. Who wouldn't fall in love with you?"

They both laughed.

The next day, Aurora invited her friends to their house.

------

"Will Pablo stay with us?" asked one of Aurora's friends.

"Yes, he has some plans to do," she said, and they all looked confused.

"What do you mean?"

She just winked at them and then started laughing.

"Ohh, he is in love, isn't him?" You finally spoke after being quiet for a while.

"Oh, you wouldn't know," answered his sister before you borrowed your eyebrows, confused.

You decided not to say anything anymore, but you felt some pain in your chest, and when you saw Gavi walking past you to sit on the couch near some girl, your heart felt like it just had broken. Your eyes couldn't not look into his.

He wasn't looking at you. Of course, he wouldn't. He is a famous football player, he is for sure in love with some influencer or with a beautiful lady that has the perfect body.

The truth is that he wasn't looking at you because he knew that if he would, he couldn't stop moving his eyes away from you. He knew that if he saw you, even for a second, he would lose control. He couldn't even stand the fact that you were there, far but so close to him.

Aurora saw you looking intense at her brother, so she decided to help both of you.

"Hermanitoo, come here a second, por fa"

"What?" answered the boy after standing up while going near his sister.

"If you really want to stay with us, then we should play something together. God knows when we will stay together again like this. We have to enjoy every minute!"

"What game?"

"Truth or dare!"

"Oh, I'm not playing that stupid game of yours"

"Then you won't stay with us"

Everyone was cheering for Gavi to play, but the only thing that made him not go was you. He really wanted to stay with you. He even sat down beside you, really, really close to another.

The truth is that you hate this game. You never enjoyed playing it, but this time, you felt like you wanted to stay.

You feared that something was to happen, and when it really happened, you couldn't do anything but panick hard. Of course, Aurora would ask you something like this after you said dare.

"I dare you to kiss my brother!"

"What-no"

"It's a dare, y/n"

You argued a lot with his sister, and you didn't even realise when Pablo turned your face into his, and he touched your lips with his. The kiss was everything you've ever imagined, and it was the best one you've ever had.

When you looked into his eyes, nothing was coming out of your mouth. You couldn't love this boy, could you? He barely even talked to you.

Gavi, on the other side, was the happiest that he finally managed to do that, and he for sure winked after to his sister as a "thank you". She only returned his smile, being happy for the both of you.

You didn't say anything until it was late and you decided to go home.

Pablo somehow excused himself, finding a way to be only with you. He didn't even know where this courage came from, but he was so thankful for it.

"I'm sorry you had to kiss me" you finally spoke.

"It was just a game after all, it didn't mean anything"

Oh, and how stupid he was for saying that. Full regret starting to feel in all of his body.

You couldn't say anything. You froze there, not being able to leave the room.

You knew he didn't feel the spark that you felt. Even yourself couldn't believe that this past weeks all you thought about was him. The moment he kissed you, your heart felt like it healed and was the best feeling you've ever felt in a while. You felt alive and.. happy.

He knew he fucked everything up.

"I'm so-"

"It's ok. Really. Like, I get it!"

"What-"

"No, like- I get it you don't.. like me. I get it that you don't even want to.. talk to me? See me? I completely understand you. Maybe I would ruin your career if people see us together. Maybe-"

"Para!"

"Maybe you just stood with us, because your girlfriend couldn't meet you today or-"

"Y/n, para!!"

You did anything other than stop yourself from talking.

"And I can't even believe myself how I managed to be like the other girls. To.. start to like you and-"

"You what?"

Now you only stopped, just because you realised that you said it out loud. It was like you admitted yourself to what you feel for him.

You started to panick and quickly got out of his house, with him following you.

"No, wait!"

He managed to take your hand and stop you.

"You like me?" he said softly with tears in his eyes.

"No, it's just-"

"Dime la verdad, y/n"

He had hope in his eyes.

"Por favor.."

You looked at him. You just couldn't stay there and lie to him. Lie to those pretty eyes.

"I don't even believe myself for this-"

"Tell me!"

"Joder, yes! Yes, I like you!"

He smiled.

"I can't believe this."

"Lo siento, Gavi. I know you-"

"No! Don't say anything anymore. You know nothing. You have no idea how long I wanted to hear you say it. To hear that you like me."

He looked into your eyes and smiled.

"Can I kiss you..please.." he finally found the courage to say it.

You were shocked. Completely shocked.

He laughed at your face, but knew that you wanted it so he did it. He kissed you.

This time, it was different. It didn't feel like it was something rushed. It was slow, full of love and adoration.

"I've liked you for so long, you have no idea. Now, can I finally call you mine, amor?"

You smiled widely.

"Por supuesto!"

I hope I didn't disappoint you with this one..

I have so many ideas of how could I have continued this, but it would have been too long, but I could make a part 3???

When they say "I love you" for the first time or when they introduce their relationship to their friends and families?

I can also do one where we have y/n's version of the story????

What do you say about it?

Shall be a part 3 to this one??

Thank you for the waiting, and thank you if you are reading this. It means a lot to me that you also read this part and took some time of yours to enjoy my stories. I wish you a nice day and don't forget.. love yourself!!

I have a request that asks him "Jealous Gavi," so it will be out soon. I hope that it will be really soon done. I'm working on it

Reminder:

@its-astrotea-love

@rens-daylight

@http-isabela

@madelineorionswan

@lilians17

@gavisuntiedboot

@barackosteaa

@magdis-things

@iheartgavi

@coco657

@httpskay

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kiukiu1270 · 3 months

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Fully finished 15 Nikolai AU Character sheet + Headcannons!!!

Nikolai is a Piano player and I will not accept him playing any other instrument other than that. His cannon design even looks like a Piano how much more piano-y can a character get?? He is those self-taught pianist. The type that only knows chords and those weird numbered sheets music you get in those church songs lol (Fyodor taught him to read sheet music later on ;3)

Also pianist of 10 years writing over here, The tenor clef page is based on personal experiences.

It took me so long to figure out his sexuality, It was between Gay, Pan, Achillean but I settled with Omnisexual

“Omnisexual refers to someone who is romantically, emotionally, or sexually attracted to persons of all genders and orientations”Basically, All is good. But of course he does have some (a lot) of Internalised Homophobia and Religious Trauma (Haven’t fully figured it out yet in my head but I’m working on it)

Figure skating ehhhhhhh (for personal reasons) Realistically it is near impossible to do a Hydroblade self taught and pretty much figure skating isn’t a hobby that you can just buy a pair of skates (1000usd per pair) (he stole those with his ability ofc) but you can’t just teach yourself through YouTube videos (based on…. Experience….) (you Will Hurt yourself) but I meannnn He has an magical portal opening ability, he got plot armour. (And I like figure skating)

Random Trivia

Cavetown coded, Star coded, Neurodivergent, Enfp, likes cardistry (like magicians you get it), has the biggest crush on Fyodor (if it wasn’t obviously enough lol), likes Pigeons (yk street rats) (I love pigeons, they deserve more love), (Personally I think cannon adult Nikolai is more white Dove coded tho), Loves theatre and the stage (based on irl Mykola), Irl Mykola was queer, Loves Tchaikovsky (me too) (Tchaikovsky was also queer btw (he was very gay)), likes Mykola Lysenko (carol of the bells original composer) (ayy father of Ukrainian classical music and him share the same name!!) (I love researching about Ukrainian culture while making this)(Ukraine is so beautiful, I wish we could’ve had the chance to visit it in its beautiful light and glory before yk…) (Making this was very emotional) (Don’t forget to support Support Ukraine guys) 🌻🇺🇦🫶

Btw here are some songs that I listened to while drawing him!!!

(Definitely listens to Tchaikovsky’s 1812 overture to fw Fyodor lol)

(Btw go watch my 15 Fyolai Astronomy mini Animatic on my page)

(This is Home will always have a special place in my heart)

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makingspiritualityreal · 3 months

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Lessons from my Anime Phase

Many years ago, before I matured into my spiritual journey, this used to be an anime blog. I don't regret this phase of my life, even though I completely outgrew it, because I believe it taught me something important.

The content of a creation is more important than the form. There is anime (sadly not as many as you would think) that is a good piece of art. There are regular movies that suck. These years taught me to look deep beyond the surface form and into the meaning of any creation. I'm still waiting for a movie as good at depicting the power of wishful thinking and self repression as Perfect Blue.

Supressing one's emotions leads to serious repercussions. One of the reasons some people find anime so weird is because it is literally an outlet for the collective mentality and emotionality of Japanese societal pressure. It feels exaggerated, but it is a reaction to the external forced numbness and politeness the Japanese society is plagued with. If you don't deal with how you feel regularly and don't express it and process it, if you don't make friends with your demons, you keep bubbling like a cauldron. It leads to having a very edgy, very draining life, not being present with yourself. It leads to not being able to function and ultimately making simple things feel like the end of the world.

Getting older is awesome. I would never come back to my past. Every morning felt like torture. Sometimes, even if life is never perfect, it moves you on in simpler ways that allow for balance. Establishment of healthy routines does wonders for mental peace. The Universe putting you in an environment where you can do that, after years of having that taken away from you, feels blissful. With time comes perspective and you can see your life shaping up and taking you somewhere. That allows you to approach the rest of your life with the same philosophy. I can read this post another 10 years into the future, and think wow, my life got even better. But at least now I am relaxed about it and don't overthink how every tiny little thing can go and I don't try to control or micromanage the future.

Youth is overrated. Hottness is overrated. Very few people really get to enjoy being young and hot, and those that do, are probably on Youtube's most watched list now. Being young and hot only pays off if you happen to be an artist, you're in a good film, or you're lucky enough to be in a music video. With those things, you build a legacy you will have forever. But most young women spend their youth and beauty on dating guys they wish they could forget in their 30s. At least I can say I spent it on spiritual growth, which I am really proud of. I was younger and "hotter" once, but paradoxically I feel like I'm becoming more beautiful. I had absolutely no benefits from being young and hot. I had no good relationships and everyone irl always criticized me for breathing. I never felt attractive. My highlights were compliments from my online friends, because noone around me actually thought well of me in my physical life. I'm married now, but this is my first serious adult relationship. I didn't have any good relationships that really appreciated my looks back then. So whatever has passed, hasn't really been used anyway. I was very insecure because I lived surrounded by unfair criticism from many people, who should have been supporting me but betrayed me. Maybe some people have fun in their youth, I honestly didn't. Moving away from all the people that made my youth something I'm glad to put behind me was the best thing that ever happened to me.

Being different growing up is hell for everybody, no matter what form it takes. Being an outcast is probably the number one debilitating thing that makes youth difficult. You have no role models, you have no support, you endure extra pressure. But over time, even those that are different end up finding their place, and they realise they were just different to people around them in their early environment, but they're not that different from the rest of the world.

#spiritual journey #spiritual growth #spirituality #spiritual awakening #personal

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motsimages · 1 year

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I really enjoyed watchin Star Trek TOS because of the tv history, even more so than because of the plots or the characters. And watching it with my boyfriend, who used to work on tv and knows better than anyone how it used to be and how it is made it extra interesting.

I have commented about how the lighting and the music play along the characters and support their emotions and endevours. I have not mentioned how they often say the same thing that is happening on screen. They may look out a window and see something strange approaching them and say out loud "look at this window! There is a weird shape coming to us!". And the music sounds intriguing and the lights darken. It all comes from radio, and I could spot that much.

In radio you have to describe what is happening, and the acting and the music help drive the story in a non-visual way. Which is exactly what happens in scenes like that.

But Boyfriend pointed out that TVs at the time, the machine itself, was small and the quality wasn't very good. Plus, you would watch it surrounded by people. Maybe in the US every family had a TV but in Spain at that time, only some families had one TV and all the kids of the building or the neighbourhood would come and watch the show they liked. Watching tv like this, in a dark room, in a small TV, with lots of people who may comment or move, means that many details are lost to the viewers. So you help them: you state out loud what is happening while showing it.

And if Star Trek was a housewife series, it also works like this. Those women probably couldn't really sit a whole episode, maybe their kids came and go, maybe they were preparing food or ironing or doing some other chores, you need the extra help of a voice, and the music and the colours, and the light so you don't really miss much.

Boyfriend also pointed out that, at the time, TV and cinema were different experiences. TV was conceived to have interruptions. There would be ads, yes, but also, there would be noise and movement in the viewer's house. As I mentioned, family members that come and go, food that is burning, a postman delivering something. And people were not so used to consume audiovisual things. Radio? Yes. Video+audio? Not really. So you help them, with all the tools you have and the mechanics they are familiar with (radio).

And that is one of the things I enjoyed more of TOS, seeing all these devices working. Seeing how they basically took the viewers hand and showed them around the plot, step by step, because they know people weren't used to that, because the quality of a domestic TV wasn't good enough for many details, because life comes in the way of tv. And it was captivating, it was simple but so well done that you just can't stop watching, that you are intrigued and want to know more, even now, that we all watch series and movies and documentaries and interviews and whatnot.

#star trek #star trek: tos #tos #history of tv

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clovecardamom · 3 months

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i decided the next music project i'm going to tackle is splatoon related, and i got really emotional listening to some of the music again.

writing through my thoughts on it over on my secret twitter, they felt actually poignant enough to share.

like. we live in a media landscape that fundamentally does not understand who and what kids & especially teenagers are. splatoon not only understands them, but effectively reminds its adult players to empathize with and care about kids. splatoon wants you to engage with kids as part of a community. their community. not yours. if you are an adult in this space, you are a guest.

this is unbelievably special. this is important in a way i don't think people get unless they either work with teenagers a lot or raised one successfully themselves.

i worked in youth development before, during, and after the pandemic and like. from my perspective, splatoon is a sacred space for teenagers to be authentically weird as all hell, and for adults to actually enjoy being around them and supporting them on their weird little journeys.

tl;dr splatoon is a video game where you see a twelve year old on your team with an epic cool badass username and start cheering for them until you're hoarse.

it rules so hard.

#splatoon #splat3 #yelling #yes i'm doing marina/pearl yuri don't @ me side order made me insane

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lookninjas · 3 months

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Love Theme from House of Leaves

So.

POE.

Like I said, I don't usually explain the Bad Descriptions from my Bad Description Song Polls. Some of them I work hard on, some of them are just bad puns on the song lyrics or titles or whatever, but ultimately, the bad descriptions aren't really the point. The point is to get a couple people curious about artists they might not have heard before by erasing any preconceptions they might have about the artist, the genre, whatever. It's a goofy little game about my very serious love of music and my genuine desire to get people to experience the joys of just trying something new.

But then there's POE. Right? Specifically, there is Haunted by POE, an album that just straight up every time turns me into a four-hour video by an obsessed YouTuber down a really deep rabbit hole. Which is absolutely fitting, because as it turns out, Haunted comes from the same place as Mark Z. Danielewski's House of Leaves.

You see, POE's real name is Anne Danielewski. Mark is her brother. And, regardless of the protests of the dudes on the MZD forums back in 2004, HoL and Haunted come from the same place -- the death of their father, Tad Danielewski, and their subsequent attempts to reconcile their complicated emotions about their perfectionist father, their estranged mother, and their shared and separate childhoods. The works contrast and complement -- House of Leaves is a labyrinth for the reader to wander; Haunted is a cache of tapes from a lost loved one that both sheds light on the past and casts preconceived notions into doubt. They reference each other (the "Poe T" in HoL, the "growling voice" in "Hey Pretty"), but don't require each other.

Even their creation is tangled. She read his book as he was writing it; he listened to her songs as she recorded them. He read a passage of his book over top of the album's first single when she was told radio was "just not playing women;" she took him on tour with her when she was opening for Depeche Mode. It was from the start a kind of double act.

And then it just wasn't anymore.

If there's a villain in this story, it is -- in a weird twist of foreshadowing -- WarnerMedia. Specifically, it is the disastrous AOL -- Time Warner merger, which saw POE unceremoniously dropped from Time Warner subsidiary Atlantic Records just six weeks after she'd signed a contract with them for three more albums. Copies of second single "Wild" were never sent to radio. Support for the album dried up. The ensuing legal wrangling saw POE's masters sold and resold from one label to another, while POE wound up unable to tour or record under her own pseudonym for years. So while House of Leaves went on to (deserved) classic status, Haunted disappeared.

I am not alone in finding this terrifically unjust. Mark Z. Danielewski himself calls the album "woefully underappreciated." Granted, he's biased, but so am I. I was a POE fan before House of Leaves was published. I discovered HoL through Haunted, although both came in close succession. For me, part of the mystery of the book is how it tangles with the album, how two people can go through the same maze and come out of it in such different locations, the same story told in different languages. But also...

I mean, it's just a hell of an album. Her voice is extraordinary. Her lyrics blend the metaphoric and the extremely literal in terrific ways. The mix of electronica, hip-hop, pop, and experimental is absolutely wired to my tastebuds (there's a reason she wound up invited on tour with the Depeche Mode, after all), and the overall work is plaintive, empowering, heartbreaking, and occasionally terrifying. It's so good. It's so, so good. I would almost be okay if this were her last ever album, it's that good.

I just wish more people were listening to it, you know?

So consider this my call to arms. If you are a House of Leaves fan, or even if you're not, even if the footnotes left you cold, give Haunted a listen. Just a couple songs. Just a taste.

Someone who loves you left a stack of tapes sitting by a boom box for you. Put one in. Press play.

#poe #mark z. danielewski #poe (musician)#haunted #house of leaves #sidenote: you don't appreciate how long ago some things happened until you're trying to find all the primary sources you remember #and they're almost unsearchable because of how long ago it was #twenty-something years wow

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theageoftheunderstatement · 1 year

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NME: Miles Kane tells us about introspective new album ‘One Man Band’ and shares single ‘Troubled Son’

By Liberty Dunworth, 18/04/2023

The announcement of ‘One Man Band’ – which will be Kane’s fifth solo album – comes hot on the heels of his 2022 LP, ‘Change The Show’. As the guitarist and singer-songwriter told NME, however, the new release couldn’t come at a better time – aiming to reflect his current frame of mind in the most raw and authentic way possible.

“I feel like that was like the most fitting song to come back with,” Kane said of ‘Troubled Son’ representing the album as a whole. “It’s a song [about how] we all have struggles in our lives, and sometimes we have shit together, sometimes we don’t. It’s like looking at myself in the mirror and acknowledging my faults, my fears, and sort of showing my journey.”

He continued: “I’m trying to figure it out. Sometimes you feel insecure. Sometimes you feel like the king of the world. It’s battling those sorts of [emotions]…‘Shit, am I good enough? Is this good enough?’”

Written at the tail-end of 2022, the 11-track album is balanced on contrast, he explained. It ventures back to the sound of his some of his earlier music – notably ‘Don’t Forget Who You Are’ and ‘Inhaler’ – as a way to create something new. It takes an isolated, emotional theme, and conveys it in a “super upbeat” way, designed for festival stages.

“The whole album is pretty pumping,” Kane told NME. “There was a conscious effort that I wanted to make it super upbeat. I didn’t want any strings. No brass. No piano. I just wanted it to be like what got me into playing guitar. A bit like a song like ‘Inhaler’ on the first album [2011’s ‘Colour Of The Trap’] – I wanted that energy again. That was the objective that we had.”

Set for release on August 4 via Modern Sky and produced by The Coral’s James Skelly, ‘One Man Band’ – as Kane explained – doesn’t simply make false promises of authenticity, it tries to convey it in everything from the album cover and music videos, to the names who collaborated on it.

Kane returned to his roots in the north of England to write the LP, and enlisted help from close friends and family to ensure the most “stripped back and real” result possible.

“Most of it was written up north,” said Kane. “I went to Stockport, wrote there with Tom [Ogden, Blossoms frontman]. Then James [Skelly], who was the singer from The Coral, he produced it. Last year we were having a back-and-forth of sending demos, and we recorded it in December and January in Liverpool.

He continued: “My cousin Ian played drums [so] it is a family affair. It’s the first time we’ve ever all worked together. It’s weird how it just fell into place and it feels right. It probably wouldn’t have worked if we’d tried it when we were younger, [but] it was a really nice experience to feel that support and enthusiasm. It sounds like the fucking Indie Mafia!”

Alongside the long list of musicians who collaborated on the album, Kane also recruited a familiar face for the pub-centred music video of ‘Troubled Son’: YouTuber, streamer and The Inbetweeners actor, James Buckley.

Discussing how the idea for the guest cameo came about, Kane said it stemmed from a want to have the music video be as true to his everyday life as possible.

“He’s my mate. I’ve known him probably since my first album and we had just been out a couple of weeks before. Then he just came down for that video! They’re all my mates, all in the pub – we went for a day and just got pissed,” he said.

“Again, I just wanted something just super real and not too posed. Just showing what I do with mates. Even the artwork, a friend took that and it’s of me, not too posed. I wanted it all to be sort of stripped back and as real as can be, to be honest.”

Looking at the release of ‘One Man Band’ and beyond, Kane insisted that, above all else, he is eager to hit the stage again. “I am itching. I just need to get out there. I’m dying. I’m chomping at the bit, really,” he said, also hinting that he is wanting to rekindle his long-time collaboration with Arctic Monkeys’ frontman, Alex Turner.

Although nothing has been announced as of yet – Kane did confirm that an upcoming appearance with the iconic Sheffield band later this year is “very possible” and something the two “have spoken about” recently.

As for fans Kane and Turner’s own band, The Last Shadow Puppets, the songwriter added that while they will “definitely” revive the project at some point, there are no official plans for a reunion happening “any time soon”.

“We always speak about it,” he added. “It’ll always come up. But now we’re both doing our things, you know? I think when it just falls back into place naturally in terms of being creative, writing songs or whatever together, then that will be the day.”

As for Kane’s other supergroup, The Jaded Hearts Club – which also featured Jet’s Nic Cester, Muse frontman Matt Bellamy, Blur’s Graham Coxon, Jamie Davis and Zuton’s drummer Sean Payne – the promise of new music seems increasingly more hopeful.

According to Kane, the band are considering reforming and turning their focus away from covers and towards writing their batch of original material. However, again to the dismay of hopeful fans, this isn’t due anytime soon. “Probably at some point, we’ll do a little record of some original songs,” he said.

“It is a plan. So I think we’ll have a little dive over there at some point. At the minute, I’ve just gotta keep my head balanced on [though]. But one day I think we’ll do some originals and see if they sound any good.”

#interview #miles kane #mk5 #one man band

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deathofpeaceofmiiind · 5 months

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high infidelity | twelve

The rest of the world was black and white, but we were in screaming colour *Noah’s POV* I woke up the next morning pretty early, I had a slight headache from all the beers I had last night but it was manageable. Ellie was still sleeping but I couldn’t help but admire her before I got up. Yesterday was the perfect day and I wondered how we’d ever top it, but I’m sure Ellie had some ideas up her sleeve. She gave me a sense of adventure and excitement I haven’t had for something outside of my music in so long. She was such a breath of fresh air. After I realized I had been staring at her for ten minutes zoning in and out I decided to get dressed and go find us some coffee. I walked outside and it was already so busy out, but I wasn’t that surprised considering I’m used to LA. I had my AirPods in listening to a podcast when my phone rang, it was Matt FaceTiming me.

“Hey lover boy.” Matt serenades me as I answer. I looked down at my phone and he was sitting on our tour bus, not even looking at his phone and I could hear Call of Duty being played in the background, quite loudly too. “Thanks for dropping a bomb on us and ghosting.” “What bomb?” I chuckled as I saw a Starbucks down the road. I could’ve easily googled what was around me but I wanted to explore this city. Vancouver was really growing on me… “That photo of you and El!” He yells at me before dying in his game. I never had the heart to tell him he was terrible at video games, but I feel like someone needs to tell him before he gives himself a stroke. “Sorry about that, we got…busy” I replied as I licked my lips, getting flashbacks of what happened last night and how I wanted her moans saved as a voice note. “You little slut.” “Shut up.” I felt myself blush. Ellie and I never slept together last night but after I had my fun with her, we took a small break and ended up falling asleep. Not to stroke my own ego, but I was pretty damn proud of myself. I’ve never had a girl react to my touch so authentically before, most of them would put on a show, but not her. “Dude, I think I’m falling in love with her.” “Wait are you serious?” Matts eyes darted to the screen, not caring that his game was still on. To be honest, I don’t think it would make a difference if he played or stood still. “Yeah” I replied softly. I pulled into an alleyway so I could finish talking to him before I went inside. “I don’t know man. This girl just sees right through my persona and sees me for who I really am. I’ve never experienced this much emotion over a girl before and it’s weird.” “Wow I didn’t know you were down that bad man.” Matt said as his eyes darted back and forth. He cursed under his breath as his controller vibrated even more and he threw it onto the couch, giving me his undivided attention. “I don’t blame you though, she’s so hot.” “Dude she’s so hot I would commit any crime she told me to do.” I laughed, there was no denying what a fucking babe she was. Every time I think about that classic red lip she wore the first night, I wanted her to leave it smeared on other parts of me besides my face. “She could run me over with her car and I’d say thanks.” “I’m starting to think you like her or something.” I joked as Matt’s face went bright red. “Nah man, she’s all yours.” He half laughed as he reached over to grab his controller. “Just remember she’s going through a lot so don’t scare her off, she’s gonna need your support. I’d hate to see you fuck this up again.” “I’ll try my best” I partially lied cause all I wanted to do was profess my love to her at our next show but that would make her run for sure. “It seems like we’re on the same page right now but I know she needs to do what’s best for her and her son.” “Wait…She’s a MILF?” “Goodbye Matthew.” I chuckled as I hung up the call. It amazes me how Matt can go from being serious to a high school kid in a flash. I found myself circling back to some of his comments about Ellie but I shrugged it off. I’m sure he was just joking.

#noah sebastian #fanfic

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lillefromsiberia · 4 months

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Leaving The Gaylor Community

When I started to listen to Taylor Swift, I was so excited. Her voice and her lyrics were a comfort to me. I would fall asleep to her music, I would do my chores to it, it was my obsession and for a person who usually just simply enjoys things it was new and exciting to be so bewitched by something.

I soon realised that some of her songs didn't make sense to me, and while I was researching on what could she mean by some of her lyrics I stumbled upon gaylor theory, and everything made sense. So much sense that I was speechless. All I could do was read countless posts and watch presentations over and over again, because the analysis of her lyrics was SO GOOD and it made SO MUCH SENSE.

I began to feel this spiritual bond with Taylor, as a closeted queer person. I felt like I knew her, and she knew me, even though we have never met and will never meet, but we understood each other. I didn't feel alone.

And, honestly, I also was invested in the drama and the secrets of it all. We all love to gossip, very human (and sometimes very useful) thing to do, so I wanted to talk about it with someone, I wanted to be up to date with gaylor lore, I wanted to read what people think, so I joined Tumblr. And I was not dissapointed.

The humor, the analysis, the theories - all of it was amazing.

And then the drama with the NYT article happened.

At first I was FUMING. I was so annoyed that I even deleted some of what I wrote because I posted some not so chill takes. It was intense. I was intense.

I calmed down in a day, of course, but the conversation was still going, and going... and I started to become curious about what people were saying. I mean, I knew what I agreed with, but what kind of points are they making against that article? Are they all slightly to moderate homophobic, or are there actual valid takes that I haven't seen yet? I wanted to know.

So, yesterday I watched a video by a queer person who was angry about the article. I've read some comments under that video.

I don't remember any arguments/points, but I saw how triggered people were, it stuck with me and I honestly felt bad. They were hurt, scared, angry, frustrated, they lashed out - I mean, everything I did. I know how that feels.

I fell asleep thinking about it all. Their perspective, my perspective, and the questionable importance of me holding on to something that at the end of the day doesn't change anything in my life.

And the truth is that I don't feel okay being a part of this community anymore when I saw how much pain it was causing to queer people. I can't ignore the truth of their emotional experience. Maybe it causes the same pain to Taylor. I don't know and will never know, but the thought of it haunts me and I feel bad.

Also, I realised that I lost control a little bit and started to become delusional at some point. I actually forgot that I don't know her. I grew too confident about my opinions and I began to view them as facts.

So, I choose to leave. This was a wonderful experience that I'll never forget, I've never been a part of a fandom like that. It was awesome.

I feel awkward right now. A lot of you followed me because I was active in the gaylor community. I don't know what I am going to do with this account.

But I know that I will not be a part of the swiftie fandom at all, starting now. If there's a chance that she's straight (and there is, because at the end of the day we don't know for sure) her behaviour during Lover era was not okay and I don't feel comfortable supporting her in this way.

Anyway, feel free to unfollow me, and I am sorry. I know that this post will upset some people who I like on here, and I hope they'll understand that it's just a decision that makes me feel comfortable and at peace. I don't want you to think that I am trying to make a point, I am just updating and explaining my decision because it felt weird and rude to just disappear.

I strongly believe that we all should always decide for ourselves and do what feels right. Keep doing what you think is right for you, babes, I fully support you.

Thank you for being so amazing, kind and smart. I wish you all the best, my darlings.

I loved being a part of this little world with you.

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lxmiko · 9 months

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Can i have a matchup plz 🥺👉🏾👈🏾

Gender: cis female

Pronouns: she/her

Sexuality: heterosexual ally

Zodiac: Capricorn

Appearance: 5’2 African American hourglass body type black curly wavy hair blackish brown eyes chubby cheeks wears glasses when necessary (driving or class i should wear them all the time only just started needing glasses im still getting used to wearing them)

Mbti: infj

Enneagram: 2w1

Personality: kind smart funny motherly responsible empathetic anxious emotional moody perfectionist helpful people pleaser caring compassionate nerdy curious protective polite respectful indecisive fearful nervous introvert shy awkward clumsy low self esteem low confidence sassy sarcastic soft spoken

Likes: animals books reading writing fantasy magic sci fi anime music video games friends alone time learning personality quizzes sweets and bread helping being a part of something bigger than myself

Dislikes: spiders loud sounds people who harm others people who dont take others into consideration people i care about not caring for themselves not being listened to weird holes and patterns math and tests

Extra: i pace a lot i sing when im alone i talk to myself im a picky eater i have internalized identity crisis sometimes and i feel bad for fearing spiders (they’re just tryna live their best and not bothering anyone life but they’re so scary to me 😭)

Thank you good luck in school btw and dnt rush yourself or put too much pressure on yourself in school or writing ok you come first and im sure you’ll do great in both :) <3

matchup!!

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note: this was due a long time ago as well as everything in my inbox but i will get to it i swear >:c

disclaimer: this is solely my opinion of which character i believe suits you the most based on the description you wrote!! sorry if it isn't who you thought it'd be ;;

matchup under the cut!

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i match you with… ike eveland!!!

you two share a lot of interests! like reading, writing, anime, and singing :o

he would find your singing cute, and wouldn’t hesitate to join you in your song c:

and if you're shy about it, he's the kind of guy who'd smile endearing from behind the door as you're singing on the other side c:

ike too is very considerate of others, and because of your similarities, he’d probably try to “out-mother” you, just because he feels you deserve more care than he does

he definitely encourages and advocates for you to care more for yourself than others (even if he doesn't follow the same advice :c). put yourself first, he preaches!!!!

ike is the resident intellect of luxiem and im sure he would appreciate having another person who’d understand him ajd his struggles with the rest of luxiem’s trolling 😞

even if you two share the same anxieties and insecurities, he would always step up for you, and support you when you want to take the first step in anything c:

if you were up for it, he’d ask to have anime nights, where you two would settle on the couch and watch whichever anime piqued your interests

he would also want to read books together, whether it’d be one person reads it first and annotates it for the other, or the two of you have your separate copies and discuss it the next time you see each other

ike is also an introvert, and probably spends his own time producing and recording music, but he doesn’t mind the company of you sitting in his room with him while you both so your separate things

ike understands your thoughts on your fears, specifically spiders. the second he sees one in the house, it’s in a cup and brought outside, without you even knowing

and even if you do find out, he'll in mama mode right away, calming you down the best he can and keeping the bug out of sight as much as possible c:

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#luxiem #nijien #nijisanji #nijisanji en #ike eveland x reader #matchups #ike eveland #ike

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autisticempathydaemon · 10 months

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I'd love to get a match if you're still doing them!!

I'm currently listening to American Teenagers by Ethel Cain. There's something about the lyrics that remind me of my angsty teen years. I'm really stuck on the lyrics "crying in the bleachers and I said it was fun", super relatable lol. I'm also stuck in Hummingbird by The Haunting. My favorite lyrics are "I wish you'd walk in and I miss you pillow talk"

My ennagram type is INFP

I love video essays, the longer the better, but I especially like the ones about videogames I'll never play. I just finished one about no more heroes that was fun.

My go to way to fall asleep is my fan on full blast, covered in a large blanket, and kicking my foot back and forth until I fall asleep, which is pretty fast since the motion soothes me for whatever reason.

I love the Guy confession audio. I love Guy's energy and how he goes from light hearted to fairly serious. He seems so chill and funny and his confession was so sweet.

I'm not a big fan of David. He's cool, but I like guys who are more gentle and emotionally open I guess?

I'd love to be best friends with Gavin because he's so supportive and fun. I think he'd be tons of fun to hangout with. Or Huxley, he's so sweet.

I've researched criminal minds more times than I can count. I love crime shows and such, but I'm not a fan of the personal character drama. I just want to see people solve crime. I know the endings to them all but still like them.

When I'm tired I love to ramble about human behavior. I'm really shy and bad at social interactions so it's usually me hyper analyzing an interaction and pointing out all the ways society's social standards are weird, at least to me lol.

Other stuff- I'm a fairly artistic person, I love paint and drawing, I also enjoy cooking. I'm shy and soft spoken in public but loud when I'm around people I like. I also love sleeping and naps. I'm a bit of a pushover and need people to like me but do like helping people. I also love listening to music, picking just 1 song to write about was hard so I picked two because I like so many, sorry!

Thanks!!

Okay, so hear me out. He gets a little bit of a bad rap because of the whole Sadism’s Hold thing, but you and Ivan, specifically FlyBoi!Ivan, would be so cute together, give him a CHANCE-

I get the irony of pairing you with someone who could have once been on Criminal Minds, I swear, but I feel like Ivan is a wonderfully gentle soul when not being otherwise manipulated. His normal voicemails are proof of that, that he’s thoughtful and communicative and not afraid of being vulnerable and putting his heart out there, you know? This would wonderfully complement the sensitivity that INFPs are known for.

Overall, I think you’d have a lovely, sweet, domestic sort of life together. Ivan also strikes me as a people pleaser which is great because when you pair people pleasers together, you get a couple who consistently looks out for one another’s needs. He travels for work and never forgets to call home or ask what new creative project you’re working on, never lets you forget he’s thinking about and missing you.

Song:

You could be dancing on tabletops/ Wearing high-heels/ Drinking until the world/ Spins like a wheel/ But tonight your apartment/ Had so much appeal/ Who needs stars?/ We've got a roof/ But there's nothing/ Like doing nothing/ With you

I don’t have a firm grasp of what genre Ivan would like, but I do like the slower, swaying vibes of this song for you. It’s sweet, relaxing, the soundtrack to when he finally comes home from a work trip and is grateful to see you napping on the couch in the dimming, sunsetting light of your living room.

Runner-Ups:

Morgan is a runner-up because he has a lot of similar vibes to Flyboi!Ivan, though I don’t know him well enough to match him confidently and he doesn’t strike me as forthcoming with his love and emotions. Cam was a closer candidate if I had not really liked the domestic vibes of you with a human or unempowered person.

note: if you don’t like Ivan and I took too big of a risk I am SO SORRY but he’s a darling and I love him he’s so lovable

Read this post and send me an ask if you’d like a match-up of your own! 💌

#redactedasmr #redactedverse #redacted asmr #redactedaudio #redacted audio #redacted #busybee matches

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