thinking about a no upside down au steddie fic where steve and eddie run into each other years after moving away from hawkins, and eddie remembers steve and his fall from grace as king, and is kind of intrigued to see what kind of person he is now

and steve doesn’t remember him at all at first, because, look, eddie changed his hair again, and steve’s had a few head injuries (no upside down but i imagine he still went thru some shit with the party and with robin), and he didn’t really think about eddie in high school anyway, and he’s trying to forget about hawkins as much as possible (besides the kiddos, but they’re all moved out for college now, anyway) (obviously he lives with robin)

but steve is different now, happier, more open, flirts with guys, flirts with EDDIE, and eddie….. well, he wants to know more! and he tells steve he knows him from hawkins, and steve’s sunny little smile flickers a little, but he just apologizes for not remembering him and mentions he has some memory problems

and they get to know each other, and eventually as eddie tells him more (and maybe with the help of some yearbooks) steve remembers eddie. and. well. they like getting to know each other. and they like each other. and then they get together

eventually they’ve been together for a while, and eddie thinks he wants to maybe introduce steve to wayne, and he mentions he’s going to go back to hawkins for a long weekend (as he’s done a couple times) and this time he’d like steve to join him

and again steve’s sunny smile flickers a bit, but he says he’d love to meet eddie’s uncle, and… they go to hawkins. and it goes well— meeting wayne, at least, but steve seems a little on edge the whole time they’re there, tense when they drive in, fidgety when they go to the grocery store, et cetera. eddie thinks maybe steve is nervous about staying with the man who raised eddie, which is ridiculous, because wayne LOVES steve.

it’s not til they leave the town altogether that steve relaxes, and eddie realizes it wasn’t “meeting the parents” but rather going back to hawkins. and speaking of meeting the parents, steve didn’t ever bring his own up, even though eddie knew they still lived in hawkins. and the way steve glanced around whenever they went in public, like he was scared of getting recognized

and he asks about it, and steve doesn’t really want to talk about it, but he gives eddie snippets of it. people he wanted to leave behind in hawkins, memories that resurfaced, things he wants to forget

eddie goes back to see wayne sometimes, and the first time he doesn’t know whether to ask steve to come, so he just mentions he’s thinking about going to hawkins for some weekend and steve immediately starts making plans with him as if the invite is implicit. they go back to hawkins several more times, steve still tense and pent up the whole time they’re there

over time steve reveals more and more to eddie. everything that made hawkins hell for him, from the things he himself did in high school to the things people did to him. stuff tommy and carol and billy said to him. some of it is just typical high school bullshit (and oh, the nancy thing.) some of it is the tragedies steve went through, the horrors he had to protect his kids from. the injuries he sustained. more generally the homophobia that permeated the whole town, keeping steve from being himself. the lack of support in the indiana public school system for a high school senior who’s had two concussions and gone through incredible trauma.

his parents. the reason why steve’s mail is addressed to ‘steve buckley’ now, not ‘steve harrington’.

(that doesn’t come out until much, much later, and eddie is kicking himself for ever suggesting steve come back to hawkins.)

eddie, who hardly had an easy time of it in hawkins, is absolutely blown away by what steve had gone through in the same town, right under his nose. the entire persona that steve was trying to leave behind — the cool as a cucumber, unaffected, douchey mask he wore to hide all that he had endured. the head injuries. the emotional tragedies he had gone through. the way he had to be the rock for the kids even as he went through the same things as them.

he tries to tell steve they never have to go back to hawkins again, and steve is having none of it. he tells steve wayne can come visit them in their new city, and steve thinks that’s completely unfair to the man who had raised eddie, seriously, you’re going to make him come all the way up here?

and well i don’t know exactly what the ending is but steve is so stubborn about trying to love hawkins because it was eddie’s home and he wants to be able to go see wayne because wayne deserves to see his kid and eddie deserves to see his uncle and steve doesn’t want to be the problem :(

Plot Idea I'll never fully flush out or write but gotta get out of my head or it'll never let me know peace again. It's basically Steve sent from the future going all John Wick. if YOU want to take this plot and write it, or if it inspires you to write something, tag me in it. I'd love to read it.

A 26-year-old Steve Harrington gets sent back to the morning of November 6, 1983. IDK if it's like El using her powers to punch a hole in time or like, some other way but everyone still alive has given him something to use as proof of his time-travel and get their younger versions to believe him, because he's got a time limit. No idea how long, but once he's altered history enough that the timeline he left ceases to exist, so will he.

No one he cares about dies this time. It's the mantra playing on repeat in his head as he looks down at the notebook that took Nancy almost three full days of nonstop writing to fill. It's the entire timeline of events, gathered and recounted by everyone still alive, because this Steve has been fighting a losing battle since Spring Break of '86 because Henry won and Hawkins got torn apart and it's been a fight to survive ever since. He's going to stop that from happening.

No one dies this time.

Will doesn't get taken that night, because this Steve is already waiting for him at his house. From Will's perspective this is just some Guy but he's more scared of whatever chased him home then of the person on his doorstep. So, Steve tells him to hang tight and all but shoves him into the house before cutting himself somewhere on his arm and stepping onto the lawn yelling out 'come and get me, ugly'. Of course, the blood draws the demogorgon. And while 17-year-old Steve was no match for just one, this Steve has been fighting packs of them for years now.

He's armed to the teeth and takes it down with precision. He's not unharmed, just one is still fast and dangerous. Steve knows how to fight them now, though. He covers the dead demogorgon with a tarp he stole from his own garage earlier that day and sits on the front porch to wait for Joyce and Jonathan.

Will is both terrified and awed.

Somehow, someway, he gets the Byers to listen. Shows them the dead demogorgon and gives Joyce the notebook from his backpack.

"Read it, and if you aren't convinced, I have more proof of its contents."

And he leaves. The next morning, he has to find El before Benny does, which he succeeds at but just barely. El is skittish and afraid but Steve gets her to trust him. Maybe because her powers brought him back here, she feels a connection to him, a trust that's there instinctively?

He returns to the Byers' house, carrying El the whole way. He stays off the main roads because people are going to recognize him as Steve Harrington and the less people that see him, the better.

Joyce lets him in and immediately fusses over El. Gives her some of Wills clothes to wear.

She's read the notebook cover to cover and has questions. Steve has answers and digs into his backpack to find the item the Joyce from his timeline gave him for proof. Maybe the proof is the same for everyone - individually recorded cassette tapes of their own voices telling them impossible things. Other proof consists of a photo album, pictures of everyone, the destruction of Hawkins, and of the ramshackle home they'd built in the remains of the apocalypse.

Then something something, details pending, everyone gets filled in on the danger that's coming. Maybe the kids get left out this time, get to just be kids or maybe they don't.

Steve meets his younger self and that's just a whole Deal but eventually he gets his younger self to listen. He tells him that being a jackass isn't worth it, and that he's not going to have a reason to change who he is in this timeline, because the events that lead to him being a better person don't happen. He's not going to have his whole life uprooted, so if he wants to be a better, nicer person, he's going to have to pick that life for himself.

Steve doesn't know if his younger self will listen, but he hopes.

Steve hunts down Brenner and shoots him point blank in cold blood. No regrets. Then he shoots the corpse a couple more times. He doesn't get to hurt El ever again. It's only after that that Steve feels the shift, knows that he's going to cease existing by the end of the day, and there's one thing left he needs to do.

He gets Hopper to let him post up with him in his police car at Forest Hills Trailer Park so he can try and catch a glimpse of Eddie Munson, alive and well.

Hopper asks who Eddie is to him.

"Nothing. We never got a chance. Will never get a chance," Steve answers. "Your Steve Harrington won't ever have a reason to even look his way. He died, back in '86. He didn't need to. He shouldn't have."

"You spy on all the other people who died?" Hopper asks. It's not judgmental, just curious.

"No," Steve says, then decides to be honest because he's going to be gone soon anyway, "I barely knew Eddie, but I wanted to love him anyway. Fell in love with his memory, from stories told to me by the kids and Wayne. We were nothing to each other when he was alive, but he could have been everything if we'd gotten a chance."

They don't talk after that. Steve gets to see Eddie arrive home, jump from his van full of life and vibrance and if Hopper notices his silent cry, he politely ignores it.

They drive out to the quarry after. Steve doesn't know what it's going to mean for him to stop existing and he didn't really want a witness to it, but Hopper insisted someone should be or else they'll all just wonder about it.

They stand looking out across the water. Hopper sees something from the corner of his eye and turns to look at Steve but he's not there anymore.

There's nothing left of the Steve Harrington from the future but his actions and a photocopy of the notebook that Nancy made because she wanted to study it, but Joyce didn't want to let it out of her sight. The cassettes, photo's, and original notebook all just disappear before everyone's eyes.

The fight's not over. Henry is still alive, but they're more prepared for him this time around. They know what to expect.

Hopefully that'll be enough this time around.

MCU timeline, if they actually cared about the characters as much as we do:

Phase 1 (setting up the universe)

- Iron Man - Incredible Hulk (+ Bruce’s DID is included and well represented, Hulk is not shown as a monster which cannot control himself so much he hurts everybody around including Betty, in fact he is shown to avoid hurting anybody who isn’t actively shooting at him, Dr Samson and Rick Jones are a must for this origin story, post credit can stay the same) - Hawkeye (includes: his childhood with an abusive father, his brother Bradley, his past in the circus so basically his origin story, his deafness, him being conscripted by SHIELD, and post credit scene with him choosing not to kill Natasha) - Black Widow (includes: her childhood in the Red Room, the fall of USSR and change in Russian politics, KGB being dissolved, Natasha’s breaking of her programming, her leaving the Red Room thanks to meeting Hawkeye, the assassination of Dreykov’s daughter, What Happened in Bucharest, Natasha joining SHIELD, and post credit scene with her taking place of the PA which was supposed to apply to Stark Industries) - Iron Man 2 (+ more info about Howard’s abuse of Tony, Natasha is there, but it’s not her first appearance, and also she isn’t shown as if she knew she was in a movie) - Thor - Captain America: The First Avenger (I think that his stupid behavior in CW is completely set up by his origin story, so I wouldn’t change anything if we wanna have that conflict with him being more concerned about Bucky than literally anything else going on) - Captain Marvel (because her existence makes Fury think about Avengers and explains why Fury wanted to create them in the first place, also action happens mostly on Earth) - Avengers (+ Jane Foster and Darcy are part of the science team and greatly contribute to the plot as scientists, because I am fed up with women being sidelined)

And because Avengers has a post credit with Thanos we should get some movies in space now related to Thanos first, before Iron Man 3.

Phase 2 (we learn about the ultimate badguy)

- Guardians of the Galaxy - Thor: The Dark World (but hopefully better written, + no damselling of Jane) - War Machine (Rhodey’s only movie, Tony is busy doing whatever) - Hawkeye 2 (how Clint dealt with everything which happened during Avengers, how SHIELD agents treated him, introducing his family?, maybe bringing back Barney and showing his relationship with Mockingbird and stuff like those) - Iron Man 3 (without the ableist meta message that all disabled people just wait to become murder machines, but still introducing Extremis) - Black Widow 2 (could be the same story as we got in 2021, introducing Yelena Belova) - Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch (includes: their childhood, how their parents died (Yugoslavia being bombed by NATO, but I doubt Hollywood would ever wanna say it out loud), them growing in orphanage, possibly attending university (universities for citizens in Serbia are free and because Sokovia is based on Serbia, and it is a slavic country we can assume they have that system as well, and there are also social support programs available from both the government and possibly the university as well), the difficulties of a life in which they have to cover their costs of living themselves, because they have no parents, American army stationing in Sokovia, twins getting radicalized, protesting against foreign influences in their country and joining Hydra, experimentation, if they were trained by Hydra to use their powers or not and how were they trained, Sokovia being shown to be normal country instead of breaking apart state which Americans see each time they think about it) - Falcon (Sam’s origin story, his mission in Afghanistan and stuff - I don’t know his origin story, so I dunno what to say here) - Captain America: The Winter Soldier - TV show about the consequences of the movie above. Possibly something akin to Agents of Shield. What happened to the agents, how world reacted to Natasha’s “fuck you”. - Ant-Man (introducing Hank Pym) - Avengers: Age of Ultron (Ultron is Hank Pym’s like in the comics, but in some versions of this Tony helped or provided tech so he still wpuld feel quilty afterwards, + no dying Pietro)

Phase 3 (everything gets complicated, but they prevail)

- Incredible Hulk 2 (what happened to Bruce and Hulk and how they dealt with the idea that Steve literally had his well-being in his ass by inviting Wanda and Pietro to the team, what is going on with Thaddeus Ross and Betty Ross, we meet Jennifer Walters) - Black Panther (different one than the one we got, introduces T'Challa and his family) - Spider-Man: Homecoming (could be earlier, just after Avengers, but *shrugs* this story is written in such a way it is better after Iron Man 3 and Age of Ultron) - Captain Marvel 2 (basically setting up why she didn’t participate in Civil War, my idea was to depower her, but not take her powers away, so she could have some more down to earth stories instead of stories set in space, maybe even explore her alcoholism that way) - Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch 2 (deradicalisation, becoming heroes) - Captain America: Civil War (Accords are better explained, Matt Murdock or Jennifer Walters show up to do exactly that, RAFT is explained as American prison not related to the UN, Steve this time has valid concerns about the Accords, but he still goes ape shit over Bucky, still lies to Tony about his family, because those traits were all set in his origin movie) - The Wasp (Hope’s origin story) - Hawkeye 3 or Hawkeye TV series - Black Widow 3 (something something about Ross hunting her, but Red Room was already taken down, so different story is here instead) - Ant-Man 2 (Wasp is here too, but this is Scott’s movie, previous Ant-Man and The Wasp) - Black Panther 2 (about Kilmonger and T'Challa’s scuffle for the throne) - Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 (didn’t know where to put it, because it is mostly unrelated to any other movies with this story about Ego, but it develops Nebula more, so let’s be here) - Doctor Strange - Thor: Ragnarok (I am not opposed to Planet Hulk, but I am more inclined to not put Bruce into a movie which is supposed to be about Thor and Loki so… more time for Brunhilde) - The Winter Soldier (solo Winter Soldier movie) - Avengers Infinity War/Endgame (it makes no sense to make two movies if we can have one, the snap was used as a plot device more than actual defeat of the Avengers, so it can last less than 5 years and also no time travel which then you have to explain why TVA didn’t put everybody in jail for that, Tony doesn’t die and Carol and some other powerful people (LIKE HULK, Hulk is NOT less powerful than Thanos or fearful or something) take down Thanos instead and Tony finally retires and is left alone by everybody goddammit)

Phase 4 (new era, some heroes retire, others take their place, while different ones just get the grip of whom they truly were all along, and also we get a new ultimate bad guy and possibly set a stage for his defeat) <- this one not really well set up, because we don’t know most of the movies and TV shows which appear in this phase so dunno how to set them.

- Spider-Man: Far From Home - Photon (origin story of Monica Rambeau) - War Machine 2 - WandaVision (or Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch 3, adjusted, so it would not repeat some facts and would only remind about the most important stuff. Also, Pietro lives in this timeline so no Bohner guy lol, he is just insufferable brother-in-law to Vision, and weird uncle to kids) - The Falcon and The Winter Soldier (but with Steve who didn’t go back in time, because there was no going back in time in this timeline, he just finally is learning what accountability is and has to forfeit his shield, because it’s time to retire) - Falcon 2 - Winter Soldier 2 - The Wasp 2 - Loki TV series (Loki survives Thanos and is taken by the TVA, it basically doesn’t force the story to make him quickly develop feelings in the first episode and bypasses that issue, + more Loki Variants, all genderluid and presenting in various ways in the show) - Incredible Hulk 3 (Bruce and Hulk finally start communicating and Hulk becomes gradually smarter, and we meet Bruce’s another alter Grey Hulk and the circus with getting along starts all over again, because Grey Hulk hates Green Hulk xD, is setting up She-Hulk) - Shang-Chi and the Legend of Ten Rings - What If…? TV show - Ms Marvel TV show - Eternals (feels like should be in different phase) - Spider-Man: No Way Home - Doctor Strange: In the Multiverse of Madness - Thor: Love and Thunder (about Mighty Thor - Jane) - Black Panther: Wakanda Forever (about Shuri?) - The Marvels (Captain Marvel 3 basically) - Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quntamania (setting mutiple Kaangs I suppose) - Moonknight TV show - She-Hulk TV show - Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 - Blade (feels like should be in different phase) - Fantastic Four - Avengers (in which they fight Kaang?)

I was going with the idea that every superhero should get at least 3 movies ONLY about them. As of now, I managed to put 3 only for a few, and some were swapped for TV shows instead to fill the place and better show the character and what they’re up to, because TV shows have more hours than movies.

I know there are supposed to be TV shows for Armor Wars, Iron Heart and Secret Wars, but I dunno when, so no idea where to put them.

A Post-Avenger Nick Fury accidentally goes to the future and sees his two best agents (Steve and Nat) are married. Natasha notices Nick isn't from their timeline (she just knows lol black widow tingle) and Steve gets a smug grin and just says "Best matchmaker ever" Nicky Fury returns to the past and calls Steve and Nat to his office to offically "partner then up" and said to himself, "this two motherfuckers don't know what's in store for them" NICK FURY IS THE OG MATCHMAKER 🤪🤪🤪🤪

hi anon! i know this took me a while to finish but i hope you like it! thanks for the prompt!

Title: when push comes to shove

Relationship: Steve Rogers/Natasha Romanoff

Summary:

These two motherfuckers don’t know what’s in store for them.

so the future part of this place takes place after Endgame.

modifications: Steve and Natasha has been married before IW. They had kids in those five years between IW and Endgame. And of as per my usual, no one dies XD enjoy!

Also on AO3!

“Motherfu-”

–

Nick Fury woke up in his room, his head pounding. He couldn’t remember much except for an explosion at the SHIELD facility the day before. Has it been a day? He only remembers getting hit with a ray of light. And suddenly, he woke up. He propped himself up on his headboard gently, his vision swimming.

After steadying himself, he squinted and looked around his room. It looks different from how he left it from. He remained sitting that way, analyzing his surroundings. It’s most definitely his room, yes, but also, it doesn’t feel like it. He heard a beep and looked down at his phone.

Frowning, he took the device and examined it. It’s most likely his personal phone because it’s not SHIELD issued but why does it look so… advanced? He patted the jeans he was wearing - Why is he wearing jeans to bed? - and took out a phone. His phone. It’s an iPhone 5. The one that is currently beeping looks way too modern. What is this, an iPhone 12?!

Nick checked the newer phone in his hand. It immediately unlocked when he brought it up to his face level. What in the SHIELD tech power is this?Opening the messages app, he saw an unread text from Natasha R. Hm, Romanoff.

“ Hey Nick, let me know when you get there! Have a safe flight! The kids miss you already.”

“What the-”

There was a photo underneath the text - of two young kids pouting at the camera. The boy has reddish-blond hair while the little girl has long blonde curls.

“Why is Romanoff sending me pictures of kids all of a sudden…” he muttered to himself, feeling his headache come back - this time, from stress. What is happening to him? Last time he saw Natasha was two days ago, giving him an update on the Chitauri clean-up happening in New York.

Gathering himself, he walked to his living room to turn the TV on. He almost did a double take; his living room is vastly different from how he remembered it. What felt like a bachelor’s pad before - bare walls, sleek black leather sofa and a matching glass table - is now replaced with a leather sectional and picture frames all over the place.

He sauntered over to the shelf that holds what looks like awards and photos. One of the framed photographs looks like a wedding, looking closer, he almost dropped it when he realized who were getting married.

It was Steve Rogers and Natasha Romanoff. And it looked like he officiated the wedding, based on how he was at the head of the altar looking at the two happily. Next to that is a photo of two kids smiling brightly, the same kids he saw on his phone earlier, sitting on his lap on what looks like Christmas morning - And is he wearing a Santa costume??!! The frame’s border has an engraved “World’s Best Grandpa” on it.

Well, he’ll be damned.

–

Okay, Nick Fury pieced it all together. After a while of brooding and confusion, he figured that he’s not in 2012 anymore. How he got there, he has no idea. So far his theories are severe memory loss or time travel. He’s witnessed the cutest, cuddliest cat eat a person and just a month ago, aliens were on New York City. So, really, the possibilities are endless.

After figuring out how to get to Natasha’s house, he stopped on the sidewalk to take it all in first. Who would’ve thought - his best agent and master spy, living in a house with a literal white picket fence. And has two children. Married to the American Icon. Oh, the number of Cold War jokes he could think of right now.

His reverie was broken by screams of “Grandpa Nick!” and he turned just in time to see two bouncing children run to him and latch themselves on each of his leg. He looked down and smiled at them, awkwardly patting their head.

“Grampa Nick, you’re back!” the little girl basically screamed, tugging on the sleeve of his pants.

“Mommy said we won’t see you until next week!” the boy told him, giggling, and failing to notice the strange look he had on his face. He was thinking of something to say until a voice cut him off his thoughts.

“Nick? What are you doing here?” Natasha asked, leaning on the doorframe and looking at them. By her legs is a golden retriever watching him. Dang, they even have a golden retriever. Nick smiled and shook his head at the thought.

“I, uh, decided to stay…?” he answered her, well, more of asked, really. The kids let go of his legs and took each one of his hand, pulling him to get inside the house.

Natasha arched a brow and stepped aside to let them in. “Steve is grilling on the backyard, we’re still waiting for some of the guests to arrive,” she informed him, watching him sit on the couch.

Nick nodded absent-mindedly as he looked around the living room; the house just feels so warm and so… not Natasha. Not that he doesn’t think she’s a warm person, no, but she’s just not one to settle for domesticity. That’s why she’s one of his best agents - she’s not one to get attached or dwell on herself for too long. She’s cold and closed off - he knows that the only ones to get through her barrier are himself, Clint, and occasionally, Maria Hill. So to see this Natasha - wearing a casual tee and shorts, with her hair long and up in a messy bun - is a nice change.

She also looks younger and happier . Nick isn’t one for using cheesy words or anything, but there’s nothing else to describe it - Natasha is positively glowing. Natasha caught Nick looking at her and narrowed her eyes and tilted her head while he gave her the look . It’s the look he usually gives her when she questions him during meetings and she laughed.

“You know, I missed that look,” she said, moving to sit next to him, the little boy on his lap. “I haven’t seen that since your last meeting,” she said fondly, stroking the boy’s hair.

“My last meeting?” he asked incredulously. Surely she’s not implying that-

Natasha narrowed her eyes at him once again. “Yes. You know, the last meeting you had before retiring?” Nick’s eyes widened fractionally - never the one to openly display his reactions, but Natasha noticed it nonetheless - and he stayed silent. Natasha sighed, leaning back on the couch. “You’re not Nick Fury, are you?”

Nick frowned. “The he-” he was going to say ‘hell’ until Natasha widened her eyes and looked down at the boy on her lap. Nick cleared his throat. “What do you mean, I’m not Nick Fury? You know me better than that, Romanoff.”

Natasha chuckled and poked the child. “Hey James, go get daddy and play with Sarah for a little bit please?” the boy - James, it seems - beamed up at her and kissed her cheek before jumping down and running out. Natasha looked back up at Nick, who was watching the two intently. “See, that’s how I knew you’re not Nick.”

Nick opened his mouth to defend himself but Natasha held up a hand to continue. “Yes, you’re Nick Fury - I don’t think you’re a Skrull,” she said, smiling and shaking her head. “But I have a feeling that you’re not from this timeline, aren’t you?” she asked, as if a person not in the same ‘timeline’ is a very normal occurrence. Since when did she know about Skrulls? Is Carol back?

He was about to answer when Steve Rogers walked in, an apron fastened around his waist. Nick tried not to laugh as he got closer and leaned down to kiss the top of Natasha’s head as if he hadn’t seen her in a while. “Nick? What are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be in Mexico with Phil and May by this time?”

Natasha waited until Steve was sitting next to her before speaking. “I don’t think this is our Nick.”

Steve frowned and stared at Nick. “Is Talos playing a prank on us again?”

“How do you know Talos?” Nick spoke up and sat up straighter.

Natasha grinned. “See, you’re not our Nick, but I think you’re still actually Nick Fury.”

Nick Fury just looked at her passively, obviously asking for an explanation.

“Nick, what was the date yesterday?” Steve asked.

“June 17, 2012.”

Natasha and Steve shared a look - in sync, Nick noticed with fascination - before turning back to him.

“Nick,” Natasha began softly. Uh oh. He does not like where this is going. “I’m sorry to tell you but the date today is September 28, 2025; you’re 13 years into the future…” she trailed off, laying a hand on his knee and squeezing it.

“The Nick Fury in this timeline is currently on vacation in Mexico with Phil Coulson and Melinda May as well as other SHIELD agents. He must have left his backup phone at home.” Steve added.

Nick stayed silent, trying to process what he just heard. “Do you know how to get me home? Or back to 13 years ago, at least?” he asked after a while.

Natasha and Steve exchanged a look. Again. Nick fought the urge to roll his eyes. Really, they’re cute, but they’re going to make someone feel left out if they continue to do their silent communication thing.

“Well, we do have a way to travel through time… but it’s complicated. Do you think anyone from your time can bring you back?” Steve asked.

Natasha snorted, making both men turn to look at her. “He’s from June 2012. That’s a month after the Battle of New York. Time travel won’t even be on our minds back then. I highly doubt it.”

Steve cast her a sheepish smile before raking his fingers through his hair. “Well, I guess we gotta do a part three of the Time Heist, then.”

Nick raised an eyebrow at them. “Time Heist?”

“A lot of things happened in those 13 years, Nick.” Natasha answered with a smirk.

“I can tell,” Nick retorted, looking pointedly at the two. “Last time I saw you, a helicarrier blew your mind and you were crying about the 21st century. But now you’re talking about time travel like you do it everyday and both of you have two children and house with a white picket fence.” Nick tipped his chin at Steve. Natasha’s smirk grew wider while Steve blushed an angry scarlet and looked down, a shy smile playing on his lips.

“So spare me the gory details and tell me about you two,” Nick continued. “How did this-” he waved around them, “- happen?”

“Well, all I can say about that is you’re the best matchmaker ever,” Steve answered, squeezing Natasha’s hand, his eyes twinkling.

—

After a whole afternoon-long conversation, Scott was ready to take Nick home. They all went to the Compound to set everything up and explain the mechanics of it to Nick.

“You ready?” Natasha asked Nick as she and Steve approached him.

“As I’ll ever be,” he answered with a smile.

“Here, keep this,” Steve took out a picture of James and Sarah from his wallet and handed it to Nick, who was hesitant to take it at first. “Really, it’s okay. We have thousands of pictures at home,” Steve reassured with a chuckle. “Besides, you’re the reason we happened. Or should I say, the catalyst that made us happen. I know Nat and I’s partnership were rocky at the beginning so whenever you feel like screaming your head off at us, just look at this photo. I swear, it’ll help.”

“Maybe all that yelling I did was what made your sexual tension snap,” Nick joked, making Natasha blink and look at Steve. Nick noticed the action. “Don’t tell me-”

He was cut off by Scott calling him to get in position. He shook both Steve’s and Natasha’s hands as he made his way to Scott. After a wave at everyone, he was gone.

“You know, he’s not wrong. It was after that one mission where he yelled at us after we fucked up in Ireland that we first…” Steve cocked his head down at Natasha, who was smirking up at him.

“Tested the durability of Irish-made headboards?” Natasha asked, licking his lips as they both reminisced their first “casual sex” night together. Steve let out a throaty chuckle and leaned down to clash their lips together.

“My god, go home you two!” Tony yelled, rolling his eyes fondly as he brought Scott back.

Steve and Natasha were pulling away from each other just as Scott materialized. “Aw, I want a kiss from Captain America too.”

“Oh, I’ll give you a kiss,” Sam piped up, waggling his eyebrows at Scott, who walked over to him and gave him a hi-five.

—

“Nick! You’re alive!” Maria Hill all but shouted in surprise as he walked in his office in the Triskellion. She was at his desk furiously flipping through reports.

“Why do you sound so surprised?” he asked, approaching his desk. Maria stood up from his chair and made way for him.

Maria gave him a weird look as he sat down. “What do you mean? Nick, part of that building exploded , we have 10 SHIELD agents casualties. Well, I guess it’s just 9 since you’re here…” she muttered the last part to herself. “But you were the only one missing - we figured you were vaporized on the spot. The others died from the explosion itself. These are their files,” she pointed at the stack of folders on his desk.

“You thought I was vaporized ?” Ouch. That sounded like a harsh way to die, even for Nick. Maria just nodded grimly. “I was just… transported somewhere else.”

Maria perked up at that. “Oh? Dr. Selvig had that theory but we all thought it was nuts… he said based on the energy, you must have been brought in another time.”

Fury scoffed. “Well, he’s not wrong.” Maria tilted her head, fishing for more information, but Nick waved his hand. “Another time. Are Romanoff and Rogers here?”

Maria nodded. “Yes, sir. They were both in town because the facility in New York had to be renovated. Most of our active agents are here save for Agent Barton who’s still out on his mission.”

“Can you call Romanoff and Rogers in, please?”

“Yes, sir. Do you need anything else?” Maria asked and Fury shook his head. She gave him a nod and exited the room.

Once he was alone again, Nick pulled the picture Steve gave him. James looks just like Steve except he got his mother’s eyes and most of her hair color. Sarah, however, was all Natasha, except for her father’s bright blue eyes and blonde hair. He smiled fondly at the picture and put it back in his wallet just as he heard his agents approach his door.

“You called us in, sir?” Steve’s head popped up from the door. Nick nodded and Steve and Natasha walked in, standing in front of him.

“I never thought you’re dead, you know, for the record. I believed Dr. Selvig,” Natasha told him smugly, making Nick chuckle.

“Well. I’m back and I have a mission for the two of you.” he took one of the folders from his desk and slid it forward to them. “This will be your first solo mission as official partners.”

Silence followed his statement as the words hung in the air. He raised an eyebrow at them, waiting for the blow up that’s about to happen. He almost thought they’d go down without a fight until:

“NICK!”

“Sir, I’m not-”

“He’s not a spy-”

“I’m really more of a sold-”

“Clint is my part-”

Ah, there it is. Nick leaned back in his chair and let the two of them scream it out, their words drowning the other out. This is fascinating to watch, really. After a few more moments, the two eventually stopped, huffing, when they noticed that their director was silent.

“So there’s that. The folder has everything you need to know. Take what you need and report back when you’re done. Good luck!” Nick said with a fake cheerful voice and a big smile. The voice might be fake but the smile was real. He really was excited.

He saw Natasha glare at Steve, who looked just as pissed, if not a little horrified. She grabbed the folder from his desk like a snake would snap at its prey, and promptly turned on her heels to exit the room, Steve following with his head hanging down.

Nick has to admit, he thought there would be more fight. But he also knows that Natasha knows that once he puts his mind onto something, it’s not going to change. Once they were fully gone from his office, he leaned back on his chair and pulled out his wallet to look at James and Sarah again. Oh, these two motherfuckers don’t know what’s in store for them, he mumbled to himself and grinned mischievously.

Stucky-centric Endgame Thoughts

So I’ve thought about it, and that ending isn’t nearly as bad as it seemed on first glance, from a Stucky shipping perspective. I’m giving up on the spoiler cut because I’ve been replying to other people’s stuff anyway, so my blog is already contaminated. So here goes.

First thing’s first: this is not a time loop.

The way the final scene is structured makes it look like a time loop -- Steve goes back to the 1940s, lives through to the present (without anyone noticing), and on this particular day drives himself to that park bench to explain what happened to Sam and Bruce. But this is impossible. Leaving aside the laughably ridiculous notion that Steve could last through the first year of the Cold War, much less seventy years total, without doing something drastic enough to get himself on the evening news, the premise itself doesn’t work. If time loops were how the universe worked, there is no possible way that both Thanos and Tony could have snapped. It’s a paradox. Which means what the Russos said in their interview, convoluted as it is, is our only option -- Steve went back to the 40s, branched into an alternate universe, grew old in that universe, and then somehow universe-hopped back for the final scene.

In other words, Steve did not choose to leave Bucky in the present while he went to live a life in the past without changing said past. He went to an alternate reality in which everything from 1945 onward had not yet happened, and doesn’t need to happen the way he remembers it. He can take down Hydra and get Bucky back by 1950. There is nothing stopping him. I expect a veritable Cambrian explosion of Steve/Bucky/Peggy fic in this new universe, y’all, I am not even remotely kidding.

Okay, but what about our Bucky?

Even if Steve saves Bucky decades earlier in the new timeline, that doesn’t erase the fact that he’s left the Bucky we know behind for good. Which could be taken as a betrayal... or not. Because here’s the thing: Bucky knew. He canonically knew before Steve left that Steve wouldn’t be coming back; this is evident in his dialog and the Russos have confirmed. Which could mean one of several things:

Steve never mentioned staying in the past, but Bucky knew him well enough to realize that’s what he really wanted and that when the opportunity presented itself, he would choose to take it.

Steve told Bucky his plan, and Bucky respected his wishes to not tell the rest of the team until after it was done.

Bucky suggested the plan.

All three share a basic theme that I think is critical to our understanding of the situation: Bucky let Steve go. Steve didn’t steal away in the proverbial night. Bucky could have tried to stop him, or at the very least could have spilled the beans to Sam and Bruce and placed his hope in the combined power of a three-pronged guilt trip. Instead, he gave Steve permission to go, just like Pepper gave Tony permission. We didn’t see the conversation on screen, but what Bucky must have said to Steve can’t have been that terribly far from “We’re gonna be okay. You can rest now.”

(excuse me, I need a minute)

(*sniffs* one more minute)

(okay)

And Bucky will be okay. Bucky’s always had a higher level of self-preservation than Steve, and what that translates to in this case is that he’s learned to cope. He’s spent years clawing his way back from Hydra, with only a little help from Steve, and he still has a support network in Wakanda. He can handle the 21st century, even without Steve beside him, and he knows it.

But why?

It’s a common staple of romance/shipping that, as the Beatles say, “all you need is love.” I know many of us are hurt that Steve had an opportunity to stay in the present and build a life with Bucky, only for it to hit us like -- well, like an iceberg to the hull -- that Bucky-in-the-present wasn’t enough for him. But we’re also all about healthy relationships, right, so I think this is a situation where the canon simply compels us to accept that, as per Patty Smyth, “sometimes love just ain’t enough.” Steve’s been missing huge chunks of himself since the day he got defrosted. One of those chunks was Bucky, and Bucky’s return went a ways toward filling one of those holes -- but Bucky himself wasn’t the same, and while Steve received some comfort from having him back, that comfort was counterbalanced by the knowledge of how Bucky had suffered and Steve was unable to help him. Other chunks, of course, include Peggy (whom he also did truly love don’t @ me) and everyone else in his home time. And now suddenly there’s Tony, who as it turns out never actually forgave Steve for what happened between them in Civil War. Steve is messed up, y’all. Someone else might be able to cope with that list of regrets, but Steve has really never coped that well, just buried his feelings and gone into fights with his helmet off. And when your options are “stew on things you can’t change and be miserable for the rest of your life” vs. “try to move on,” then absolutely, moving on is the best decision. But when you get a magical third option of “freebie do-over,” then you know what, maybe the do-over really does beat moving on as a way to heal. It’s the premise behind Tony’s BARF system, after all.

And Bucky loved Steve enough to give him that chance.

Movie Review: Avengers Endgame

I’m already tagging it with like four different spoiler tags, but just in case someone who hasn’t gotten to see it yet forgot to block spoilers, review under the cut:

The short of it first: I love this movie. I, however, also hate this movie. There were many wonderful things about it and many things I disliked or that upset me. Overall however, I think the balance made for a perfect ending to the MCU. (Which, makes me feel really weird about the fact that there will be... more MCU.)

Fair warning, this review will not be in any particular order, more like... what comes to mind. Because there was just so much happening in it. So I’ll bolt the particular hero each section will be about, for easier navigation.

First things first, we gotta talk about the time paradox. Look, I know it’s not a plothole, it was very much intentional, they set it up from the moment Bruce met the Anient One, however it still drives me insane that they killed Thanos from 2014 and... it changed nothing in their time.

If Thanos from 2014 is dead, he can never even go and collect the Infinity Stones and this entire reality should cease to exist. The Ancient One’s explanation on how removing something from the past leads to a split timeline makes little sense to me, because it first and foremost should change this timeline.

I know it’s most likely meant to set up the multiverse - the x-Men, it’s going to be used to work in the X-Men, probably also the Fantastic Four. But the lack of explanation as to why changing your own past does not affect your present time was rather... frustrating for me.

Same goes for “Loki escapes punishment in 2012 with the stone”. How did the stone end up in the 70s then? And what impact does this have on the Thor timeline? Will he wreak more havok? Or change to good earlier?

For a movie working the primary angle of time-travel, answers about the paradox created were... too scarce for my taste.

IRON FAMILY

That being said: My Tony Stark stanning ass is absolutely living for the fact that Tony just... solved time-travel in one night, casually, like it’s nothing.

And as such, I gotta talk Tony first, don’t I?

I am now 100% the Tony-Nebula friendship that everyone was expecting after Infinity War and in the reality I will be accepting from hereon out, Nebula and Tony get to stray friends.

Though, a dynamic I did not expect to absolutely love and stan is Rhodey and Nebula! Oh, that was so good. Generally, Rhodey in this movie was so good. He is usually just treated as the add-on to Tony and in this movie, he was... so much more than that and seemed to stand on his own a lot. (Yes, he’s still in this section because he is still part of the Iron Family so sue me.)

At first, I was honestly frustrated that Pepper was just... The Wife And Mother and seemed to have so little... input into things. Like, support, brainstorm along with them, anything. She deserved to be more than that.

I genuinely don’t have an opinion on Morgan. Like, yay, Tony got to be a dad, but also she was just such a generic Child with no defining personality traits, which granted, there was no time in this movie to establish that, but having no time is not an excuse for shortcomings.

What really broke me was Peter though. Peter being the reason Tony invents time-travel, even though it could mean losing Pepper, losing Morgan, losing his own life - Peter is what pushes him over the edge into helping. And then the reunion. The hug, the confusion on Peter’s face. And gods did it wreck me when Peter cried over Tony’s body.

I mean, generally, Tony’s death wrecked me. I’m starting to cry again as I write these words. I fully admit that it was perfect. There is virtually no better way to have Tony Stark go out than by him single-handedly in the most literal way possible saving the entire planet and the universe, with his last line being “I am Iron Man” as he wields the Infinity Stones - seriously, if you watched this movie and still try to post Anti Tony shit, I have to wonder what movies you even watch because this entire damn franchise literally rests on his shoulders, holy shit.

It was... It was the most perfect ending for Tony possible. But I still hate that it ended. I wanted an Ironheart movie where he mentors a potential Riri Williams for the future of the MCU, I wanted Tony cameos in future Spider-Man movies, I... wanted him to get the chance to grow old and see his daughter grow up.

But holy shit that funeral. Everyone. Just... everyone. Even Harley. Which, admittedly, I only figured out after wrecking my brain for an hour trying to figure out who that lanky brunette kid was that stood around alone and then remembering that Harley should have had a cameo in this movie too and--oh. That... that was really a deep dig for the Iron Man stans and I wished it had been a tiny bit more prominent. Like, having him and Peter talk, even just for a brief moment, about Tony, to remind us who Harley is and what those two have in common. That’d have been a nice touch.

TEAM ANT

Scott being the one to come up with time-travel as the solution was kind of hilarious to me, considering he isn’t a scientist and he has never encountered time-travel before. (I mean, Stephen literally introduced time-travel to some of them as a thing that is possible before.)

Legit, one of the two only times I cried in this movie was when Scott searched for Cassie’s name on the memorial and then was reunited with her. Paul Rudd played it so well and so heavy with emotions, it was amazing.

Hope, well, due to having been dusted, she got a shorter end of the stick. Which, in itself, should not make me salty because obviously did the dusted ones not play a huge part in the movie - but the fact that she was dusted to begin with, seriously, they dusted more female characters than they did male characters and there are already so few female characters and I am still salty that in a movie called Ant-Man and the Wasp it was entirely about one Wasp getting un-fridged just to then have them kill off two Wasps.

I have to admit, I have a certain saltiness that while Hank got a cameo in the 70s, Janet again was not deemed important enough. She got a non-speaking role to just... stand there during Tony’s funeral. That’s it.

TEAM CAP

Steve. Gotta admit, this movie brought me back to St0ny. Civil War completely killed that ship for me, but I really, truly loved how they worked Steve and Tony together again in this movie. From the first confrontation when the ship lands, to Tony screaming at Steve in the compound and them then slowly rekindling again. Because the emotional outburst was needed and deserved and had it not come, something would have felt... cheap.

I’m not sure how I feel about how they solved things with him and Peggy. Honestly, I’m so tired that Peggy post the first Captain Marvel is literally just Steve’s Love Interest, even though she was so much more. When she appears, it’s only to dance with Steve or to be sad about Steve and it’s... frustrating. And I don’t know how much they just changed her life by having her and Steve get married in the 70s. Not to mention, uh, what did Steve do in the past 50 years? Just hide out at home? Since Captain America’s face is kind of recognizable.

Look, Steve and Peggy getting married and growing old together, being happy together, is absolutely the dream ending for Steve’s storyline. Genuinely. But this was too big a thing to be so casually handled. The ripple-effect that two Steves in one timeline have, the implication that this Steve really did give up fighting bad guys, during four decades where no Captain America was there to help, it’s... so very, very vague. I know there was no time to dive into this in full length, obviously, but that doesn’t quite excuse it.

I love that he handed the shield off to Sam though. He is easy to establish as the new Captain America since we all already know him and honestly, the only two options would have been Sam or Bucky - and... please just let Bucky retire, that boy’s been through too many decades of shit don’t force him to live up to Steve now, so yeah, Sam is the better fit there.

That being said, Bucky. I liked that Steve handed the shield off to Sam, but I was missing a proper Steve-Bucky reunion. Bucky nudging Sam to talk to old!Steve and even before that, after getting undusted, there was... nothing. After 75% of Steve Rogers’ plotline in the MCU being centered around Bucky Barnes, the least they could have done would have been a proper, heartfelt reunion and a last conversation between the two. So Steve didn’t want to tell Sam about the marriage? One more scene. One where Bucky sits down next to Steve and Steve tells Bucky about his life with Peggy, even if just shortly, but... that was something that was missing, for me.

Clint was... there. I just... I don’t know, man. He was out there murdering criminals for five fucking years and they couldn’t track one archer during all that time and now he’s supposed to go back play house with Laura? I honestly, genuinely would have preferred that they killed him off at that point.

Also because Natasha deserved better. They fridged her. They took the only female member of the original team and basically killed her off for the others’ man-pain. Seeing those five guys crying about her at the lake felt like really nothing but fridging. She died so they could have the stone, she died so Clint lost her - that was literally the only note on that. She died so Clint would lose her. That’s the definition of fridging and it makes me mad, because apparently during those five years, she was like a leader to everyone else.

I was, honestly, ready for them to spin off a female Avengers team after this movie. Led by Natasha. And that they did her dirty like that makes me mad.

Wanda was also in this movie. She was badass, that’s something. (This is literally the nicest you will ever hear me say about MCU!Wanda.)

WAKANDA

They really did Wakanda dirty. Mainly so because they did them dirty in Infinity War already - aside from Okoye, they literally killed off every single significant cast-member from Black Panther.

Shuri, I’ll hand it to you they had to kill off because otherwise Steve and co would have had an alternative to go to instead of Tony and thus they wouldn’t have brought the team together as they planned. But the way she was treated after? She didn’t even have a speaking role in this movie, damn it. Not even... one line... She and Peter never got to interact. She got a bit of action, but not much.

T’Challa at least had a speaking role, but also suffered from having been dusted in the previous movie and thus only getting ridiculously little screentime.

M’Baku! He had one scene. He ran through the screen once. That was it. That’s just... ridiculous. He didn’t even get a major throw-down or anything.

And Okoye? The only undusted one? I am genuinely disappointed that she was not part of the team. They got the whole gang together, but the gang didn’t include anyone who wasn’t an OG Avenger or a Guardian. Valkyrie and Okoye should have been brought onto the team too.

Never mind Nakia, she didn’t even get a cameo at the end like the queen did. She was just like... Sharon Carter and Jane Foster: Not found. And yes, I get it, you can’t get all 200 MCU cast members, that doesn’t make it less frustrating when key characters are just... missing.

THE ASGARDIANS

The humor around every Bruce and Thor scene was... very Ragnarök. That’s not a compliment. It’s jarring, considering that this is an Avengers movie and I would have preferred their regular characterization over that one-off movie one with its... strange, cringey humor.

Seriously, they did Bruce so dirty. He was little more than a punchline. He’s a genius scientist, but now he’s a poser in the body of the Hulk who rather takes pictures with fans? And who completely screws up time-travel - but don’t worry, it’s hilarious so it’s okay.

And I better not start with Thor. Look, I approve of the fact that he grieved, that he was shown to not handle shit well. But... the extend in which he didn’t handle shit well was... not satisfying for me, but that’s a matter of taste I suppose. I didn’t like that he killed Thanos off just like that when Nebula was right there - and yes, Thor lost a lot, but Nebula would have had the right to kill him off and Thor took that away from her.

I did love his conversation with Frigga though. That was... incredibly well-handled and very nice and exactly what he needed to get at least most of his shit together again.

Though it really frustrates me how... ridiculous it was that he didn’t save Frigga. What makes anyone who got dusted more worthy of being saved? They died too. They were killed off too. It was a legitimate kill. But here, you decided that going back in time to save them is okay. When Thor however gets to be right there and have the chance to also save his mom... that’s a no-no? Why? That’s bullshit. You are altering things, saving people who died, but you get picky about what people get saving? Fuck off.

Valkyrie was... why was she not part of the team. They went and picked up Thor for the mission. They sent Bruce to pick up Thor, Bruce who knows Valkyrie the best after Thor. Why would he not also take her with them because they could have needed the backup?

And I don’t know how to feel about her as a king either. Maybe... Maybe let the Asgardians vote? Try democracy if you say you no longer have monarchy? You can’t just... appoint the next king like that.

Where exactly did her pegasus come from, by the way? I mean, did they have time to save the stables in Asgard too...? Just, where?

Also on the note of characters who didn’t make it into the movie I’d like to give honorary mentions to Sif, who I love and dearly miss and also would have wanted to meet Valkyrie.

THE GUARDIANS

Same as with Cap and Bucky, I was salty that Rocket and Groot did not get a heartfelt reunion.

And that Quill getting to see Gamora again was handled as a joke despite just how... emotionally loaded it could have been.

Drax and Mantis were... also in this movie, I guess. Some of the dusted characters came out shorter than the others.

Also, I really don’t know how I feel about Thor joining the Guardians, to be quite honest. Not... my favorite idea, because him and Quill have such a bad, obnoxious dynamic and it was already annoying during Infinity War and now during Endgame and both had like... five minutes of it. An entire movie with it would just give me a fucking migraine.

FEMALE AVENGERS TEAM??

And also, on the note of a female Avengers team - that group-shot of every female hero looked really fucking epic, I had tears in my eyes when Okoye repeated Natasha’s words from Infinity War; She’s not alone. That was... that was a bit much for me, but personally, I found it really undersold.

They took the time out of this movie to show us a shot we have all already seen. That big epic “first time of all the Avengers in one scene” shot.

They had the time for that, but they didn’t fully give that to the girls. It was clear they were trying to recreate that moment with the female Avengers, but it was such a split-second image - the least they could have done then would have been to give it a proper spin, to pause, to really show it off. Show off what female heroes Marvel has to offer right then and there.

And yes. They absolutely had the time for that. They could have just cut the damn shot that we have all already seen in favor of this new one, for example.

And since now seems to be as good a time as any, let’s talk about Captain Marvel and her hair. I love it. It made my lesbian heart really very happy.

Part of me hated that she was off-world for most of the movie, most of me knows on a rational level that the had to have her off-world or else things would have ended too quickly. And I liked how they explicitely pointed it out in-universe too, through Rocket and Carol.

Stephen was also in this movie. Not very much due to having been dusted and not actually doing a lot, but him telling Tony what to do was... It made me cry some more. And I guess Wong also got a brief cameo.

IN CONCLUSION:

So, on the overall, I complain a lot about how the dusted ones came short, how certain emotional scenes could have been deepened.

There would have been an easy solution to that. Make one more movie. Make this finale a trilogy instead of a two-parter. There were so many characters with individual plotlines in this movie and they deserved to be heard. Endgame should have been a two-parter in my opinion.

Also, I don’t like the five years time-jump. I just... yes, yes, big tragedy, lots of people dead, but somehow I find it incredibly unrealistic that five years into the future, the world would be slowly turning dystopian and no one moved on even a little bit? Life... Life would go on, somehow. And this made it look like it just didn’t.

I’d have had an easier time had they put this one year later, but I guess then Morgan couldn’t have been an adorable girl and would have just been a screechy baby so they needed the time-jump, huh.

Still I think five years was too much on the overall. Clint out there, murdering criminals for five years without being caught by the Avengers?

But yes, in the overall, I really did enjoy the movie. While some things came to short, they still put a pleasant amount of focus on the emotions and dynamics. It was heartfelt, emotional, sad, it gave Tony and Steve both the end they deserved. It did however still include a lot of things that didn’t sit right with me or that I thought were fault and I do still require a more elaborate explanation on the time paradox.

The total sum of this movie however was the perfect ending for the MCU. Which... is actually kind of a problem considering there is more MCU happening? And while, yes, I am totally here for Captain Marvel 2 and Black Panther 2, I... honestly... am basically done with the rest? And those two mainly due to the quality of their first movies and the fact that they happen isolated. Space and Wakanda. Not... yet another story in New York but this time without the Avengers you know and miss now.

ENDGAME SPOILERS!!

Okay I saw Endgame last night and I need to vent... AHHHHHH!!! haha I have so many mixed emotions and I don’t even know. Also I typed this on mobile so sorry for any typos. 

So I first saw Iron Man when I was 11, and it was so cool. I grew up watching all of these movies. At first, Cap was my favorite bc he was ~cute~ and I was a young teen girl and so were all my friends. I also loved Loki for this reason haha. Then I saw Iron Man 3 and LOVED IT. I bought it on DVD as soon as it came out. Tony Stark was amazing, but also he dealt with anxiety and panic attacks? His and Pepper’s relationship was everything as well, and also his and Happy’s and Rhodey’s friendships. Tony felt real and human and relatable, and it was cool he was able to overcome so much even with all of his trauma. In AOU he just wanted to protect his team, and no one truly listened to or respected him or tried to understand him, and he ended up with more trauma and guilt. I just wanted him to have a happy ending. Then he met Peter and it brought me hope, after all the Civil War crap. Infinity War was crushing but not completely because I knew another movie was coming out, so there was still some hope. But then Endgame. Honestly... I’m still processing, but I don’t think I’m happy with it. And for more reasons than just Tony, though I’ll talk about that first. His storyline just seemed... blah. He gets back, gets to yell at Steve, and then goes and lives in seclusion with Pepper and has a kid. Yet you know that even with that life he’s still depressed and guilt-ridden. It’s how Pepper knows he won’t stop. So he does his best to help, time travels or whatever (honestly that whole part is still kinda confusing to me- it created alternate timelines, but what are the implications of that- and also for the rest of the MCU??) and then Tony comes back and it looks like they’ve succeeded. I was expecting him to notice something off about Nebula, tbh. But anyway, final battle, and we all know what happens. He makes the sacrifice play. He dies. Pepper says it’s okay, but I just can’t agree. He already made the sacrifice play in the first movie. I think it should have been Steve or someone else in this one to do it. If all Tony’s pain and trauma has been building to this- I just feel empty inside. It’s not a satisfying end. Sure, he saved the universe, but I feel like Strange literally could have like left a message saying don’t send Nebula to the past and all of that would have been avoided. It felt so pointless. They’d already won. Tony also only got to reunite with Peter for like 30 mins, which is lame, and will bring a whole lot more trauma to him. He didn’t even get to see Morgan again. Ughhh I’m just annoyed. And then Steve?? He just goes to live in the past?? The whole movie he’s been saying he doesn’t move on, and then he literally never does, he never grows from there. He doesn’t really develop at all. It’s true- he never truly moved on from the past, and so that means... he’ll just go live there??? I think a better move would be to have him grow to accept his life and try to be happy and actually move on. Or, like I said earlier, he could have realized he can’t move on and made that sacrifice play himself in order to allow others to live and move on. I think that would have been a more satisfying arc to his story. And it would show the love he actually has for Tony- to allow Tony to live with his family and show that he heard and understood what Tony said at the beginning of the movie. (Also, they never had a real conversation where they made up. It was like they kind had that “do you trust me” moment but Steve never truly apologized and I feel like we got jipped out of a good heartfelt moment between those two.) Also- the Natasha sacrifice was sad, but I’m not totally surprised by it. It feels like a very her thing to do, to save her family and Clint’s. But then after everyone got mad and had a quick moment of silence, it was kind of forgotten?? Like they could have even had a memorial or small tribute at Ton’s funeral or elsewhere but like put something in?? It feels like she was just kind of brushed aside. (Also- I didn’t like BruceNat at first but grew to be okay with it, but then it never became anything? Bruce made himself into Professor Hulk and there was no real closure or conversation between him and Natasha? So like... what. was. the. point???) Again, everything with her just wasn’t that satisfying, but it’s something I may grow to view differently. I did enjoy Clint’s arc and I actually think they did a great job with him. Probably the strongest arc of the movie, actually. The way they handled Thor kind of annoyed me. I think it’s perfectly understandable that he would end up like that. He’s lost his family and most of his kingdom, and he feels responsible. I don’t have a problem with that. I have a problem with how the movie and the characters responded to that. Judgmental looks and jokes... like I’ll be honest, I did chuckle at Rhodey’s Cheez Whiz joke, but now I regret that. Like being fat is funny, haha look at Thor, he’s out of shape! Uhh yeah he’s depressed! And Rhodey should know better, being friends with Tony, he should know how to handle anxiety and depression. Nobody was really trying to help or even talk to Thor much, they really just wanted him to help them. Like he was clearly struggling, and yet that was used as a joke... it makes me sad. And also Thor never even looked back at Loki? The convo with his mom was nice though. But that reminds me? Was Loki’s infinity war death actually real then? Bc ugh. I’d be more willing to accept him being permanently dead if it wasn’t in such a lame way. Daggers, seriously?? Loki has freakin magic, and he’s smart!! He could have duplicated himself or something, and that type of lame death is so unsatisfying. Also. Captain. Freaking. Marvel. I went to the movie in a Captain Marvel T-Shirt, hers is one of the first actual comics I read, and I loved her movie. I was soooo excited to see her in this movie and become part of the team and to have some really fun banter with everyone. But then she just... disappears for basically the whole movie and hardly speaks at all (thinking about it- I think all the female characters speaking overall was wayyy low compared to mens which is sad) and she blows up the big ship at the end and that’s basically it. She didn’t really join the team, and she could have been so helpful! You’re telling me they didn’t make a way to communicate with her and they didn’t want to include her in their time travel adventures?? She could have had a funny interaction with Nick in 2012, or stopped Nebula from getting taken in 2014, or helped out more overall, idk. But she should have been a bigger part of the team. They hyped her up so much when she was hardly in the movie at all, which was extremely disappointing. Like I feel so cheated about this. This is something I’ll probably be bitter about for a while tbh... ugh she’s a queen and deserves so much more haha. Also Okoye and Wong would have been useful assets for the time travel and yet they were hardly in the movie at all? So many underutilized characters smh.... (Also I know this would be impossible and the point of the movie is for the main Marvel characters but you’re telling me that in 5 years, there was no random like French or Chinese or any other country’s scientist that could have developed time travel or another method of reversing the snap? Or someone from one of the bazillion planets out there? Like there have to have been other smart people/aliens who went all Liam Neeson after the snap and were out for revenge and solutions and they could have come up with something in those five years. But again, I know that wouldn’t work for the movie...) I just feel that a conclusion to the first real era and characters of Marvel should be more satisfying. But that’s just me, I know there are people who are plenty happy with it, and I think that’s valid. These are just my thoughts. Also, that was a long rant but I don’t want to be completely negative. Here’s some things I did enjoy. -Clint’s arc. Again, I felt it was really strong and emotional and hit all the right notes. They did a good job with him and I’m glad he got to go back to his family. -Nebula. She’s grown so much y’all. I do wish she got the final blow on Thanos, and that she clicked the button to go to the present faster so Thanos couldn’t come after them, but other than that I thought her storyline was great. She’s awesome. -That moment with all the female characters after Peter got hurt. I cheered. Marvel has so many amazing women and it was great to see them all together. I kinda wish they were given more lines and screen time though but this moment was super cool. -Morgan was adorable and I love her. -Pepper’s understanding of Tony was also great. She knew he needed to do something if he could, especially for Peter, she’s grown so much and she loves her mans I love her. -Almost the whole 2012 time travel thing was great. Some good humor and nostalgia, it was fun, I really liked it. The Loki alternate timeline would be cool to explore and I wonder if that’s what the show will be about. -Wanda had a great moment against Thanos. -Okay, while I do think that whole final battle was ultimately pointless and could have easily been avoided, the moment when T’Challa and the Guardians and everyone came in through the portals was amazingly epic and beautiful and powerful. The audience cheered and I did too. It was a cool scene. -Tony and Nebula in the ship at the beginning was great. -If Steve isn’t gonna be Cap anymore, Sam deserves it and I’m glad they went with him. -The Ancient One, Frigga, and other’s cameos were pretty cool. I liked those moments. -Tony’s convo with Howard was great. I like that he got a little bit of closure with his dad. There’s probably more but I’ve written a lot so I need to be done haha. Let me know your thoughts!! :)

i DO recommend these fics, but this ISN’T actually a rec list

a while ago i did a meta about Bucky Barnes and the Winter Soldier and Hydra and the headcanons I put in The Terror of Knowing, and I mentioned that I wanted to compile a long-ass list of fics that inspired The Hundred Year Playlist and ppl (hi @conlatio and @marveluc) asked about it SO HERE, AT LONG FUCKING LAST, IT IS.

Fanfiction, like every other art form that has ever existed in the history of ever, is all about synthesis: combining pre-existing elements to make something new. It’s the making something new thing that’s exciting. (If you’re not making something new with your found material, that’s called plaigiarism and it’s distinctly uncool.)

When I was in college and grad school, if we used material from other scholars to make a new idea, we made sure to include a bibliography. 

Now this is fic, so like. Everyone knows that we’re using found material. We put the fandom in the tags and everything. But there’s a lot of unseen inspiration, because it’s harder to tag all the fics and metas you read that gave you ideas and inspiration along the way.

I’m... making an attempt.

These are some, SOME of the fics that inspired the headcanons and characterizations and whatnot that then got incorporated into THYP. I’ve been reading MCU fic since 2014 (possibly earlier) and I didn’t even start thinking about THYP until 2017, so there’s probably a lot of stuff that went into my subconscious that I’ve forgotten about. I’m @ing the authors and sources when I know them, but if any of yall want me to like, un-@you (is that a thing??) or if any of you know of authors who have tumblrs that I DIDN’T @ but should have, pls let me knoooowwww

A (Probably Incomplete, but at least Attempted) Fanfic Bibliography for The Hundred Year Playlist

by Seriously I Don’t Have More Important Things To Do? Astonishing.

PLEASE HEED THE WARNINGS IN THE FICS THEMSELVES. THYP may be rated T for Teen (and even that I debate about tbh, given all the swears and violence) but most of these fics are very emphatically not.  some of them will probably squick you out, some of them might be triggering, so take care of yourselves.

I’ve divided the list into sections by the story they inspired, but all of these stories inspired all the parts of THYP, this is a very very very rough categorization. Think of it as my fanfic n headcanon spice rack. some stories are going to have more or less of one spice or another.

Dreamers With Empty Hands

All the Angels and the Saints by @cesperanza

"You're a brutal person, you know that? You're always rummaging through my guts with your bare hands!" and then Bucky turned away, his long, muscled back curving as he sat on the edge of the bed, hunched and struggling for breath. Steve wanted to draw him, and he also wanted to blot the image from his memory: this picture of Bucky in despair.

Speranza’s Socialist Steve is deeply flawed in a way that people don’t usually write him and i love it so much??? He’s angry, and egotistical, and righteous in a way that’s hard on the people around him and I was like YESGOOD MORE PLS. It’s also a masterful example of how to write a story that’s ostensibly Steve-POV but still manages to make Bucky not only a main player, but a driving force. It’s about Steve, on the surface, sure. But it’s also about Bucky, because Steve is about Bucky and I just *clenches fist* love it.

cascades. 

This fic. THIS FIC. Hngh. Okay so this fic is good on so many levels, but for THYP, the takeaway was me very gently lifting the Bucky-Steve-Barnes Family dynamic and then adding more swears to get to my take on the Bucky-Steve-Barnes Family Dynamic. Namely: 

“Steve was a bit of a Barnes, too, wasn’t he,” she says.

“He was ours,” says Rebecca, shrugging. “We were his.”

i crie???

More Man Than You

“You’re very pretty,” she said, and Steve tensed up.

“I’m not a fairy.”

“No, you’re not, are you?”

this fic has a study guide. and that’s literally all I feel I need to say about it. It’s an exploration of queer culture and masculinity in the 30s and 40s, thinly veiled as stucky fanfiction. (It’s also pretty brutal so I’ll reiterate that you need to heed the goddamn warnings)

Also, lest yall think I came up with Billy Thompson in a vacuum, I didn’t. In this fic, there’s a violent mob runner called Duke, and Steve comes up with a plan to take him down, and Bucky makes sure that there’s a Different plan that Steve doesn’t know about.  It’s all executed a little differently in this fic, but the idea lodged in my brain and got reused in THYP, and kind of became a central theme.

Good Morning Heartache, What’s New?

The Night War by @praximeter

IF YOU HAVEN’T READ THIS WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH YOUR LIFE. This is... honestly, just one of the finest pieces of fiction i just 

HNNNNGH

I don’t know that I can point to any specific part of this fic and say “this gave me that idea” it was more the... the feel of it. The way the Normandy invasion is written and the way the trauma is handled and the way Steve is just slightly to the left of being a real soldier and especially this:

He asked me with a smile on his face what goes through my mind when I line up my shot—God and country? Pearl Harbor? Uncle Sam? —and I stared at him struck dumb from the question so long that I think he thought I was just plain stupid. The fact is that it is none of those things—not even close. It is sick, numb fear and careful, barely breathing so that I don’t miss. I must never miss. And then when I shoot, an awful thought curls up from my trigger finger to my heart “how many mothers must be praying I will miss?”

The Thirteen Letters

oh you didn’t really think that Not Easily Conquered wasn’t going to be on this list, didja? OF COURSE IT’S ON THE LIST. But possibly not for the reason you might think. That fic is legen-fucking-dary of course, and the scene where Steve gets stabbed was obviously very inspirational for that bit in GMHWN where Steve gets shot in the thigh, but the scene that really got teeth into my brain and Would Not Let Go was the one where the Howlies meet the Winged Victory of Samothrace and 

Bucky knows the truth now. It is a deep and insurmountable truth. She has no face. Like the operative whose head he beat in, like the boy who he killed one month into active duty, even like Bucky himself, Nike is faceless. Bucky feels unprepared, or like he should have brought an offering.

Beside him Steve quakes before the oldest and the only god.

look my fixation with statues didn’t come from nowhere is what i’m saying ok

Sincerely, Your Pal

This fic haunts me because i hate the ending. not because it’s not good (It IS good) or because it’s not the right ending for the story (it IS the right ending for the story) but just because i  h a t e  i t. I just like happy endings is all, and resolutions, and this fic is why THYP will have a happy ending.

But also, I really liked the way this fic dealt with Bucky in Basic and lines like this really caught in my brain:

And of course I want to kill some Nazis I guess but not because they’re people. Not because I actually want people to die because I don’t.

And that sentiment definitely fed into how I write Bucky especially.

The Terror of Knowing

there must have been a moment by @redstarwhitestar (magdaliny’s marvel sideblog)

Listen, I’ve been trying to make sure that there’s a good spread of writers on this list but magdaliny is the exception. Magdaliny is the exception for a lot of things and there must have been a moment when we could have said no is always the first fic I think of when I think of a fic about Bucky’s time as the Soldier. Which is ironic, because it’s very much about his time after that, but that first chapter made uhhhhhhhhhhh an impression.

The fractured nature of the narrative, the way that the reader can piece together a coherent timeline but the main character can’t... that was very influential on TTOK. example:

“Kill him,” the officer says.

The subject says: “Why?”

☙

“Kill him,” the officer says.

The subject makes a mess.

☙

“Kill him cleanly,” the officer says. “Good! Good lad.”

I’ll build a house inside of you

Another magdaliny G I F T, an AU where Nat is much younger and Bucky is her dad, and if you think that didn’t affect the way I write Bucky and Nat’s relationship in THYP, then you are dreaming. 

Past the praises of the handlers, above the hot wet smell of cordite and blood, Natalia can hear crashing and shouting down the hall.

“—goddamn animals, they're little girls, they're just kids, you fucking—”

Her father screams in English, in Mandarin, in Russian, and then he just screams.

I know that’s a super sad excerpt but listen and hear me when I say this fic is actually really good and wholesome and it’s got A+++ OCs and All The Widows and it’s just really good ok

Memory

Bucky is hard AF to write and very few people write him half so well as magdaliny but one of those people is emilyenrose and this fic is M A S T E R F U L. Bittersweet and achingly perfect. It contains this beautiful moment that really stuck with me, where Steve is comparing the post WS “James” to the Pre War “Bucky” and realizes... 

He truly hadn't known James all that well. James hadn't let him. Hadn't wanted him to. Hadn't wanted anyone near him, ever—

—the way Bucky went, when he was miserable, when he was angry...

and that, to me, was kind of key when I went on to write the Soldier, because the Soldier IS Bucky, even when he isn’t.

Fool For Sacrifice

Dona Nobis Pacem

THIS GODDAMN FIC came to me outta FUCKING NOWHERE, I’d already written the first draft for FFS, I’d already started posting it, for crying out loud. And then all of a sudden I stumble upon THIS and i just

It’s already fading, just hours after the skirmish.  And the wounds Sam stitched will heal without a mark.  And the welts on Steve’s chest will disappear.  Like all of it never happened. 

Fuck the serum. He keeps thinking it, saying it.  Maybe if there were some goddamn scars, it’d be easier to process the damage.

This fic is heavy af, it’s like the 65k word version of That Chapter in FFS Where Steve Hits Rock Bottom. This was the fic I read when I was ramping myself up to tackle That Moment

three white horses

This is the other fic I read to ramp up for That Scene, and I think that probably shows in the way I wrote it. It is also is a Strong Contender for the title of Heavyweight Fic That Convinced Me Buck Is Jewish. Honestly I cannot praise this fic enough.

I think the thing that stuck hardest about the Steve in three white horses is the way he feels ghostly himself, like he’s only drifting through the present, and somehow most of his living happens in the past. It’s very beautifully done, and very subtly done, and it’s my go to fic if I am in Dire Need of a Good Clean Crie.

It’s getting an extra long excerpt because This Is My List And Neither God Nor Man Can Stop Me.

Steve's fingers touch metal when he reaches into the second-to-last box, and he feels the blood drain out of his face even before he's looked down. He knows the feel of it too well. He'd know it blind, a hundred years from now. It's Bucky's not-a-medal.

It'd been Bucky's grandfather's, or maybe his great-grandfather's, made of the kind of sterling silver that tarnishes if you look at it funny, so Bucky had always been polishing it; he'd traded cigarettes to the mess staff for baking soda and vinegar, during the war, but the thing was still soot-black half the time, like it is now. It'd been a fool's errand, wearing a thing like that in Axis territory, but Bucky'd worn it on his chain like the rest of the guys wore their Christophers and Michaels, and HYDRA'd ignored it. It was a subtle thing, though: nothing like wearing a Magen David, or the implacable H on Bucky's tags, just a thin slice of metal with a stylized branch and an oblique squiggle Steve only knows is the Hebrew word for life because Bucky told him so.

Bucky'd had a curious mix of reverence and irreverence about it, the same mixture that seemed to colour the whole of his religious life. He'd teased Steve sometimes, saying, “No, wait, you gotta kiss it before you enter the building, you schmuck, what are you, some kinda heathen?” with his legs around Steve's waist. Bucky hadn't complained when Steve had carried on with an inch of silver between his teeth, but Steve had offhandedly called it Bucky's good luck charm once, and Bucky'd blown up; it's not a superstition, he said, it's not a fucking amulet. He'd apologized later, and he'd explained, and said it was a touchy subject, just ingrained. Jews weren't supposed to believe in luck. Bucky'd thought maybe it was the opposite: maybe luck didn't believe in Jews.

Sparked Up Like a Book of Matches

AH YES, THE FIC THAT TAUGHT ME ABOUT LIL AUDREY JOKES. SIPPY CUPS OF SUPERBOOZE! A ROBOT CALLED SHITCAN!! WHAT MORE COULD YOU NEED IN A FIC??? I really like the way it addresses Steve being in the future is all

This one could probably also fall into the list of fics that inspired DWEH, in part because of This, which stuck with me Hard and heavily influenced the opening:

“...You ever have scarlet fever?"

Sam shakes his head.

"It starts in your throat, like an itch, and as your fever starts to climb, your tongue swells up and turns white and that's when they know, really, even before the rash, that it's scarlet fever. You can't swallow, it hurts so much. You're freezing and your joints ache and your fever keeps spiking and you start to hallucinate. I, uh, I thought things were crawling on me and there were voices that I didn't recognize whispering things that didn't make any sense. My mom had to fight me just to get me to drink broth, but I threw it up most of the time, anyway. Then I got pneumonia from being so worn down from the scarlet fever and I was so lucky, Sam. Nobody seems to understand how I lucky I was to make it through. Talking to people today, to make them understand I'd have to tell them I survived bird flu only to fall sick with Ebola."

listen. For reasons I can’t fully explain, I really wanted to read that happening so i wrote it, and this is what being a writer is All About.

Actually, on a second thought, I might be able to explain it: it’s because an experience like that is Capital F Formative, and I really wanted to explore how there’s a tiny sick kid rattling around inside Captain Beefcake’s souped up bod.

(And an additional shoutout to Steve Rogers’ American Captain, a webcomic that now exists only in the Wayback Machine, but which was L O V E L Y and I sincerely hope that the artist knows that)

No Hope for the Weary

Strays

This fic? is so fluffy?? Like literally so fluffy. But this fic (and, obviously, Infinite Coffee) were very much behind the inclusion of the God Damn Starbucks, and also the source of a lot of my headcanons about Barnes & Rogers: Secret Millennials. For Example: Bucky’s Notes on How To Be A Millennial:

- Lots of coffee. Travel mugs or paper cups from Starbucks place. Often looks guilty for drinking, obv derive pleasure from doing so. Unknown as to why. Investigate further? Why is there one every two blocks if no one wants it there? 

Infinite Coffee and Protection Detail

This is another fandom classic that needs very little introduction. A+ characterization, A+ OCs, Utterly Charming from start to finish, and the originator of a very distinct way of talking that got very strongly coded in my brain as Winter Soldier Bucky.

He passes within 4 m of Barnes on his way back to his building. The mission imperative achieves a Doppler effect.

contactContactCONTACTContactcontact

Aw.

If They Haven’t Learned Your Name by @silentwalrus1

If I had to point to one (1) fic and say “Blame This Fic for THYP” it would be this one: the Fic that my roommate and The Gal Pal know as “The One With the USS Motherfucker.” This might seem like an odd statement, because if you’ve read them both, I don’t think you’d necessarily put them in the same class. silentwalrus is a genius of hilarity and THYP is a big pile of The Sads. ITHLYN is delightfully unassuming and I’m sometimes embarrassed by how pretentious THYP ended up being. 

I would technically put this under the list of fics that heavily influenced NHFTW on account of the way it portrays Bucky going by gradual degrees from murderbot to mostly human person, but listen I could never write Cryptid!Bucky the way Silentwalrus has. It’s magnificent. And TBH the level of Intensity in ITHLYN’s Steve has is something I aspire to, and the Sam Characterization is On Point, and both those things influenced FFS, 112%. Nat’s Chaotic Slav Energy in this fic is OFF THE GODDAMN CHARTS and I LOVE IT. Every single side character, down to the spaceship is given the kind of care, attention, and characterization that just... it cannot be beat, my dudes.

16/10 highest recommendation. I could not possibly pick a single paragraph from this behemoth but uhhhhh

Two minutes in there’s a grunt and a slippery, gritty noise somewhere to her left, and then the Soldier barrels past at breakneck speed, vanishing down another tunnel. A second later Steve careens around the corner, bounces off the opposite wall and crashes away after him, so fast he’s nearly a blur. Natasha’s brain, entirely of its own accord, provides her with the utterly unhelpful accompaniment of a Yakety Sax soundtrack.

that’s it. that’s the fic.

Also, this fic is Stoutly To Blame for the playlist aspect of the hundred year playlist? Silentwalrus really got me good with Grounds for Divorce by Elbow, one of my all time favorite songs, which was then paired with one of my all time favorite chapters. By the time Caravan Palace’s Lone Digger made an appearance, I was sunk. This fic introduced me to Lyube, and gave me a new appreciation(?) for dubstep. So many of the songs ITHLYN used ended up in my Very Long Stucky Playlist, though I think the only one that then went on to become part of the Hundred Year Playlist: Upside Down and Inside Out by OK GO.

And Finally, the Coup De What The Fuck Ever:

Ain’t No Grave by @spitandvinegar

yet another fandom classic... I wasn’t sure where to put this fic, but I couldn’t NOT include it in the list. Spitandvinegar’s Steve is charming and so? Sweet? and the ANG Bucky is a delightful foulmouthed mess of a person, and the Sam/Claire pairing is something I DIDN’T KNOW I NEEDED, BUT I VERY MUCH NEEDED IT and I don’t know that I can point to a single thing and be like: Ah Yes, This Bit, but this is definitely one of my faves:

Imagine you live in this country, right? And there's a brutal war, and you witness and maybe participate in a horrific amount of violence, and you lose absolutely everyone you care about. Then you end up in this other country, where the culture and ways of doing things are completely foreign to you, and random assholes make fun of you for how you dress and act and talk while you're still coming to grips with the fact that everyone you love is gone and you can never go home again. Meanwhile, everyone around you is like "smile, motherfucker, you're in the Land of Plenty now, where there's a Starbucks on every corner and 500 channels on TV. You should be grateful! Why aren't you acting more grateful?" So you have to pretend to be grateful while you're dying inside. Sound like an traumatized, orphaned refugee? Also sounds like Steve fucking Rogers, Captain Goddamn America. Except that most refugees were part of a community of other people who were going through the same thing. Steve is all alone, the last damn unicorn, if the last unicorn had horrible screaming nightmares about the time when it helped to liberate Buchenwald.

Usually this explanation yields a "huh." People don't want Sad Refugee Steve: they want Captain America, Indestructible Defender of Freedom. But that doesn't mean that Sam isn't right, because he is right, goddamnit. So yeah, Sam's a little protective of Steve. And if the last unicorn finds out that its best damn unicorn friend in the whole world is actually alive, then damn straight, Sam's heading out with a tranq gun and bringing that damn unicorn in and starting a goddamn unicorn wildlife refuge in his backyard. Or something like that: at a certain point the metaphor kind of gets away from him.

Til The End of the Timeline

I’ve recced this so many times you’ve probably all gotten sick of hearing about it, but it’s an invaluable goddamn resource and you should all check it out. 

A Shit Ton of Metas and Blogs, some of which are tagged with THYP Research but especially @steve-rogers-new-york and @hansbekhart‘s How To Brooklyn and @historicallyaccuratesteve

and last but certainly not least

LITERALLY EVERYTHING @quietnighty READS HOLY SHIT

If you’re looking for a common thread through all the above recs, it’s that almost all of them have podfics, and the vast majority of those podfics are by Quietnight. I am, and always have been, an audio learner. I read my writing aloud when I’m editing, I listen to audiobooks when I’m commuting, and when I’m cleaning, and when I’m playing computer games, because I like stories, and I especially like listening to stories. Quietnight’s podfics are Of The Highest Quality, and her taste in fic is Impeccable.

hooooly shit this post is long wow okay. I can’t promise I won’t add more to this later, but I’m leaving it for now because goddamn. it’s as complete as I can make it at this time. I’ve added a “THYP Fanfic Bibliography” tag in my bookmarks, and incidentally I really need to make sure I’ve gone through and kudosed all of these because goddamn.

Avengers: Endgame

So I just saw it again. I should’ve done this the first time I saw it. The audience was amazing. The laughs and gasps and cheers and tears! We were into it. There were a couple tops of heads bobbing across the bottom of the screen of people needing to pee, but overall a great experience with my roommate. 

But my parents wanted to see it too, so my dad bought tickets for an 11:30 a.m. showing yesterday. Earlier is better, but that means we don’t get the kids or teens who love this series. Just the adults who are taking off work. That might not have been bad, but it’s a dine-in theater (so people were constantly moving around in my direct line of sight) with one kid running up and down the stairs (I get you need to pee, but if you stomp one more time I will snap you out of existence) and people talking (if you want to whisper, that’s fine as I constantly whisper through movies, but even my mom talked loudly because she needed me to hear from 4 seats away) but not cheering. Come on! That was an amazing shot! He did the thing! We won! Clap! Cheer! Something!

I also didn’t bring my notebook to write down my immediate thoughts, so I’m going to basically give a play by play as best as I can. Mostly memories of the first showing, as I’m sure you guys would prefer. On with the review!

So the movie starts immediately with the death of the Barton family. The logo hasn’t even started, but here we go! Death and pain await us. 

Once the logo starts, we switch to Tony and Nebula on the...ship. I kinda wanna say Millennium Falcon, but that’s not even close to accurate. *googles* The Benatar. ...yeah, I’m not calling it that. Anyway, Tony’s teaching her how to play tabletop football, and it’s adorable. He’s teaching her how to be softer and she’s letting him eat the last food and he’s fixing the ship and she’s fixing his body and it’s...it’s just so nice. I mean, we have Tony doing a voice over of how they’re going to die which isn’t as nice, but their bond at being the last ones on Titan is just...I love it. We’re barely 5 minutes in and I’m about to cry.

And then we get a Carol ex Machina. Yay? Anyway, they get back to Earth (side note: the end scene of CM was apparently not in this movie, but it probably got cut due to time constraints) and Steve is the first one there. He’s the first one to Tony, the first one to try and help him, the first to hear his regrets, the first to offer sympathy and I don’t ship Stoney, but DANG! That’s how you do it! And then Pepper is there and she and Tony are kissing and hugging and it’s adorable even though we just cut out Steve and he looks a little awkward.

Cut to inside and the death toll rolling and climbing and Tony loses it. He’s still mad at Cap for Civil War. Still pissed about how everyone jumped down his throat for Ultron when he was doing his damnedest to prevent this exact situation where everyone died. And like...no. I still disagree with your idea that it was better to put a “suit of armor” around the world than protect everyone’s “precious freedoms,” but I understand what you’re saying. Dad didn’t back up Mom and now our kids have been murdered by a drive-by hitman. I get it. I’m still not supporting you, but I understand why you’re pissed. 

But, Nebula knows where the purple cockroach scuttled off to and Carol is a fucking tank, so let’s go. But the stones have already been destroyed. ...I’m sure this will have no lasting consequences, especially since the Ancient One said “these things create our understanding of time, reality, space. if you take one away...you risk catastrophic disaster and alternate timelines.” BUT NOW THEY’RE ALL GONE because some fuck boy decided to play with things he didn’t understand to “correct” a problem he didn’t understand and had no business messing with. Thor cuts off the gauntlet and then his head before walking off into an increasingly blurry image and we roll the title. 

FIVE. YEARS. LATER.

Steve’s leading a support group (ONE GUY SAYS THE WORD MAN INSTEAD OF WOMAN ABOUT HIS DATE SO NOW WE HAVE LGBT REPRESENTATION YAAAAYYYY! fuck this) and Natasha’s leading the remaining Avengers. Carol says “I’m busy dealing with other worlds besides Earth, so piece out bitches.” Rocket and Nebula...I’m assuming are doing the same thing. It’s not really clear. Okoye is...here for some reason to say there’s an earthquake, but there’s nothing we can do. Um...rescue teams? We can’t do anything about the earthquake, but if you’re reporting it, I’m sure it caused some mild damage or something? No? You’re useless. Rhodey reports that a cartel in Mexico has been slaughtered by Clint and we’re not supposed to be okay with that. I mean, wouldn’t be the first time he was a bad guy, and he’s more anti-hero/rogue vigilante than bad guy, but you do you.

Then Steve comes in, sees Nat trying not to sob because Clint’s bad and the world is bad and she’s stressed, and tries to cheer her up. But, DING DONG! Scott’s not dead. See, a rat in San Francisco pushed the right button and spit Scott back out into a storage area. After walking home with a little red wagon and finding Cassie, now age 13-15, and getting the 411 on the last 5 years, he got the La Cucaracha van out of storage and drove it all the way to upstate New York. So now he’s jittery and weird (probably because he spent 5 years hours in the quantum realm and he went a little cuckoo) and saying they should try time travel to get the stones back so they can undo what Thanos did. 

It’s just crazy enough to work. LET’S ASK TONY! Who has a child to show that time has passed. The daughter is wearing an iron mask that Tony says is for “mom” so we aren’t confused when Rescue shows up later. Not that anyone would know her name is Rescue outside of comic book fans, but who cares because Tony is an adorable father. But then the plot shows up and says “get in, loser, we’re going time heisting.” Tony’s all like...you’re kidding, right? And so is the audience, but weirder things have happened in comics and Tony always loved a dramatic entrance, so whatever.

Then we have Professor Hulk, as he is apparently called. And...in my opinion, this is the worst scene in the movie. We’re in a diner and the food is in bowls bigger than my head and Professor Hulk gets talked into helping with the time heist. Sure, fine, we need the plot to move forward. We have a nice explanation how Hulk and Banner are one and it’s Hulk’s body with Banner’s brains because they did some soul searching and are better now. That’s nice. I like that. That is a good part of this scene. But then we have some weird kids taking a picture with Hulk/Banner (you know what, I’m just going to use whichever one I want and you can fight me) and Scott says, “do you want one with me? I’m Ant-Man.” And thus begins the longest 5 minutes of the entire movie. It might not even be that long, but it actually feels a little longer. The kids don’t want a picture because they’re Hulk fans instead of Ant-Man fans. That’s fine, that happens. And they don’t know who he is, which...this is New York and he’s over in San Francisco. Plus, no one sees Ant-Man. Giant-Man/Goliath? Sure. But not Ant-Man. And Scott sees it and immediately retracts his offer to keep it from being weird. But Hulk, to be nice, pushes the issue, which makes it weird. And I’m like, if you want to push it, ask if they want Cap’s or Black Widow’s? But no, we have to have the kids smiling but clearly not wanting too and Scott seeing that and being a little hurt but understanding he’s not an A-lister and Bruce being “kind” but about as intelligent as Hulk. We have time for this? The movie is over 3 hours long? We kept this? Why? Did test audiences love it? Cut it!

And back to Tony who shows us a picture of him and Peter goofing off (don’t make me cry yet, save it for the hug or the Simba/Mufasa moment) and thinks that maybe he can have hope again. We don’t know how long he works on it, he just says “one last time before bed and I shut it all down.” But then...“SHIT!” “shit.” Duh! Knew that was coming. Kids say the shittiest things. But it’s okay because she loves him 3000. That’s going to be a knife wound that won’t heal anytime soon. Anyway, he tells Pepper that he figured out time travel. Because that’s something you can just do. And because he knows that if he continues down this path, he’ll probably unretire again. He won’t stop helping because he can’t stop and he doesn’t want to stop. He’ll become Iron Man again. And Pepper says, “but will you be able to rest?” And, if you guys remember back in IM3 how Tony couldn’t sleep? It would probably be like that. It might not be visions of Thanos’s ship, it would probably be Peter asking why he couldn’t come home. So...yeah, mull on that for a bit. 

The next day, Banner, Steve and Nat test out time travel on Scott. But he becomes a kid, an old man, and a baby because “instead of pushing Lang through time, you essentially pushed time through Lang.” Also, Tony’s here! He got a little “I told you so” moment, but he and Steve are definitely on better grounds than the last time we saw them. (Tony’s porch doesn’t count because that was mostly Tony and Scott with a little bit from Steve to say “pretty please with a cherry on top?”) And then Tony asks if we’re getting the whole team.

Rocket and Nebula show up in the ship and blast away the insides of Scott’s taco. “Rhodey, be careful on reentry, there’s an idiot in the landing zone.” *CLANK* *Scott drops the taco shell in fear* “Sup, Regular-Sized Man?” It’s so funny followed by Hulk sharing two tacos with Scott to replace his. Adorable. Anyway, so Hulk and Rocket go to pick up Thor in New Asgard. No idea where this is. I think it was in Kansas originally, but Rocket, I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore. Looks more like coastal Maine or something. We meet up with Valkyrie who informs us that Thor is doing a bang-up job leading his Asgardian subjects in their new home. Also that she’s weirded out by Professor Hulk, which is fair. Me too, although I can look at him while my roommate said she couldn’t, but she’s a weirdo so whatever. 

Anyway, Thor’s holed up in his house with Korg and Miek playing Fortnight and Thor threatens a child for being an ass. By the way, Thor’s fat now. Yeah, after watching everyone he ever loved die plus failing to prevent the deaths of quadrillions, he’s wallowing in a drunken stupor and eating carbs. It’s played for laughs, but like, sheesh. It’s pretty rough. This is Thor! A literal god! This is the guy who’s been stabbed multiple times by his brother and continues to love and care for him. He can bounce back from anything...right? Hulk tries to convince him to come back, but he doesn’t consider it until Rocket says they have beer on the ship.

Now to pick up Hawkeye. To Tokyo we go! Hawkeye Ronin is chasing this guy who’s probably Yakuza or some other mafia guy. Clint kills him, which is kinda cool in a visual and choreographic sense, but not super profound. Nat says we might be able to bring your fam back. “Don’t give me hope.” “I wish I could’ve given it to you sooner.” And now we test the time travel thing. Clint goes home (space=check) and grabs his sons’ baseball mitt before hearing the voice of his daughter (time=check) and being pulled back with the mitt still in hand (probably accidental, but return with objects=check). Now we figure out when. Previously on Thor the Dark World...on Guardians of the Galaxy...on Infinity War...on Avengers...on Doctor Strange: Infinity Stone montage. This montage marks the start of hour 2. We are now getting interesting. 

Cap, Scott and Tony to Avengers with Bruce tagging along for five seconds. Thor and Rocket to Thor: The Dark World. Nebula and Rhodey to Guardians and Clint and Nat to Infinity War, but at the same time as Guardians. Natalie Portman’s back and being stalked by a rabbit. Rene Russo’s back and being stalked by fat!Thor. Tilda Swinton’s back and explaining magic to Bruce. Robert Redford is back and being an ass to past!Tony while present!Tony tells Scott “lightly kill me.” Come and Get Your Love is back and cutting out so we can laugh at Chris Pratt. Hugo Weaving is back and just as unhelpful as ever. That one shot of Avengers is back and showing up the framing of this movie. (seriously, I want a good shot of A-force or all of the “avengers.” Apparently the Russo’s don’t understand screenshots.) Also, discussion of America’s ass is a thing (I love it) and MCU!Cap quotes Comics!Cap by saying “Hang glider” (I hate it.) But apparently Tony forgot about Hulk’s mini-freak out over the stairs (should’ve let one of the fliers go down the stairs instead of Hulk) so in the middle of their heist, the case flies open, Loki grabs the tessaract and gets the heck out of Dodge. ...I’m sure it’s fine.

Now Steve and Tony go back even further STAN LEE CAMEO! RIP! and Scott, being new here, doesn’t understand that Mom and Dad are finally on the same page and now is when you just sit back and watch in awe as they do their thing better than you ever could. So they go back to 1971 and Steve sees Peggy and Tony runs into Howard. We’ve switched to old Howard, not the one from First Avenger/the Agent Carter series. And Tony and Howard bond over being dads (he was still shitty. Just because he wasn’t horrible all the time doesn’t excuse his emotional and [at least in the comics] physical abuse) while Steve dreams for 5 seconds before tricking Michael Douglas out of his office to grab more Pym Particles for them to get home. 

Meanwhile, Nat and Clint fight on a cliff while Red Skull sits back eating popcorn or some shit. Why are they fighting? Well, who’s going to die, of course. Because Clint feels guilty over becoming a vigilante and Nat has nothing else to live for? Okay, pros? Clint has a fam. Nat is managing the Avengers. Cons? Clint went a little crazy for a couple years, but he was doing what he thought was helping, so...??? Nat has red in her ledger, but she’s been trying to wipe it out since day one, so...? They basically do that thing where one person gets up and the other person trips them as they go by. Eventually Nat dies and it’s pretty sad. But...now we have all the stones! Yay?

Oh, and Thor and mom had a heart-to-heart where Frigga said “you’re a failure and that’s okay because we all fail. Now, look on the bright side, find your hope, and start eating better.” Then Thor grabbed Mjolnir (I’m sure there were no implications there, unless Cap gave it back with the Aether) and was super happy because he was still worthy. Even fat and a failure, he’s still worthy of wielding Mjolnir. So sweet. So nice. Anyway, it’s rabbit season duck season rabbit season duck season and Rocket and Thor skedaddle and meet up with everyone else at the same time, but without Nat. They mourn, but Thor says “knock it off, she’s not dead.” Which, considering how many times Loki’s died plus he’s wielding his destroyed hammer with the destroyed Infinity Stones ...yeah, that’s fair. But “she can’t come back” because her contract’s up and she doesn’t wanna.

And now we enter hour 3! The best part, in my opinion. We have the stones. Tony’s made an Iron Gauntlet to hold them. Thor wants to do it so he can finally feel useful and like he did something right, but Tony won’t let him because he’s not in the right mindset. Fair, Thor’s probably still drunk as a skunk, but the guy needs a win. You should understand that, Tony. Hulk says “I’ll do it cuz I’m bigger than you, and Thanos was big and his arm got turned into a chicken wing, extra crispy.” So he puts on the Iron Gauntlet and screams in agony. That’s what happens when you use subpar materials. Probably should’ve gone to Nidavilir instead of using Earth tech, but whatever. Hulk snaps and then birds are singing and Mrs. Barton is calling her husband like...where did you go and where’s all the food? We probably won.

But, uh oh, apparently Nebula has a network (...sure?) and they forgot to put her on airplane mode when she went back to 2014. So the broadband was crowded and Nebula kept making the dial-up sound. Thanos took present!Nebula in 2014 on his ship and past!Nebula takes her gold plating and puts them on top of her blue plating (...no, but whatever) and she goes back to the future instead of present!Nebula. Now that past!Nebula and her continued obsession with getting daddy’s approval are in the future, she can bring the entirety of Thanos’s ship with her. I guess Thanos replicated the Pym Particle? Or Maw did? Whatever, we need a final battle, so here we go.

Just as Clint is gaining hope and Scott’s saying “ooh pretty” to the birds and Tony’s trying to keep Hulks arm from turning grey, Thanos says “surprise, muddafucka,” and drops a single nuke. Rhodey, Rocket and Hulk are all trapped together with rising water and Hulk keeping the building off of them with one arm. Scott’s running as fast as his little legs will carry him to help, although it’s probably good that he’s so small in the continually collapsing building. Clint has the Iron Gauntlet and is running away from those ugly things from Infinity War. You know, the Mieks that kill themselves at the Wakandan border? Yeah, gross. And Tony is joking with Steve and it’s nice even in this scary time. Thor suits up with a cool braided beard, Thanos says “I’ve changed my mind. Forget wiping out half, let’s start from scratch,” and it’s time to start fighting for another 45-50 minutes.

Thor, Steve and Tony go at it. Combo moves and team ups and Thanos is getting beat up, but not going down. Then he throws Iron Man away. He flicks Cap off of him. He grabs Stormbreaker and starts to do the thing that Thor does to his future self last movie. And a girl in the audience just starts shouting, “Come on, Thor! Come on, Thor!” And internally I’m right there with her, but then THE AUDIENCE. LOSES. THEIR. SHIT!!!! I know there were more people screaming than just me, but I probably contributed about 50% of the collective volume. STEVE ROGERS IS WIELDING MJOLNIR! YES! We’ve been waiting for that since Ultron! Probably my favorite part of the whole movie. I’m totally going to find that video on YouTube and save it for myself because FUCK YEAH! 

Meanwhile, Hawkeye has been playing keep away with the evil Mieks and past!Nebula shows up to grab the Iron Gauntlet. Present!Nebula convinces past!Gamora they’re on the same side and we can kill Thanos. They start by saving Hawkeye from past!Nebula and kill her. ...I’m sure it’s fine. 

Thanos kicks America’s ass. He calls down the 4 uglies we killed last movie plus more armies. I guess his ship was there on Earth while he was dicking around on Titan? Otherwise, how did the the triangle ships get to Wakanda? Whatever. We have a gorgeous shot of Cap in the high ground backed by white walking down to face Thanos with the low ground backed by darkness. And then...“Hey Cap...Cap, it’s Sam. Do you copy?...On your left.” And a magic wormhole opens up and Okoye, T’Challa and Shuri all walk through and nod at Steve for a whole minute before Sam flies through. And then, all the circles show up and everybody walks through. Valkyrie on her horse; Spidey thwiping behind the Guardians; Wong and his sorcerers; Wasp and Bucky; Scott growing big and saving Hulk, Rhodey and Rocket; it’s a who’s who of the MCU. “Is that everyone?” “You want more?!” (yeah, actually. Where are my Defenders?) We’re all eating it up. Clapping and cheering and then Cap raises Mjolnir and says, “AVENGERS...assemble” and they charge and the audience goes wild. I personally think the assemble shouldn’t have been so quiet. Like, how did they hear him and know to charge? But it’s fine. I don’t care. KICK THE ANNOYING GRAPE’S BUTT! And they do.

In between the fighting, we get several nice moments and call backs. Rocket and Bucky fighting side by side again, although Rocket doesn’t make a prosthetic joke. Scott and Hope start up La Cucaracha van to take the stones back in time and Hope calls Steve “Cap,” because “that’s what we call him. If you’re a friend.” Iron Man and Rescue are fighting back to back and I love this power couple so much. Doctor Strange gets sidelined taking care of a burst damn (guess he’s too powerful and we can’t have him showing up the og Avengers) but Tony’s like “Is this the one where we win?” Strange is all “if I tell you what I wished on the birthday candle, it won’t come true,” which I guess is as good an explanation as any. Hawkeye’s getting overwhelmed and T’Challa says, “Clint, give it to me,” because he doesn’t know his name is Hawkeye since he introduced himself as “We haven’t met. I’m Clint.” “I don’t care.” Spidey takes it and tells Karen to “turn on Instant Kill” because this is a time where it definitely qualifies. He then gets rescued by Mjolnir and Cap telling him “Hey, Queens, head’s up,” which is adorable. And then Tony hugs Peter because he loves him but also “That’s not a hug, I’m just getting the door for you. We’re not there yet.” Past!Gamora saving Quill and when he sees her and caresses her, she knees him in the balls. “Seriously? Him,” she asks. Present!Nebula replies, “It was either him or a tree,” which is fair. Drax isn’t interested, she’s like his murderous little sister and Rocket is...no. We’re having so much fun.

Wanda shows up in front of past!Thanos and says “You’ve taken everything from me.” “I don’t even know you,” which is fair. But then she’s like, “You will.” And dang! If that’s not a badass line, I don’t know what is! She and he go at it and it’s awesome and then he’s pressing down on her, but she smiles and destroys half of the dual sword, making him effectively fucked. And she’s got him. He’s a goner, until he cheats again. He cheated with Vision and he cheats here. So what’s important is while Iron Man or Thor or Captain America are super powerful, Thanos can easily take them on in hand-to-hand combat. But Scarlett Witch? She’s too awesome! He can’t beat her playing fair! The cheating prune has to call for air support to get her off of him. Screw everyone and everything else, get this powerful witch off! And it works, but luckily, the sorcerers put up shields to protect people from the falling nukes. And then...they stop and point up...oooooh BABY! LET’S GO! I mean, it’s totally a Carol ex Machina, but I love seeing her just tank everything. 

She takes out the ship, allowing everyone a second to breathe and Peter to slightly uncurl and hold the Iron Gauntlet. “Hey, I’m Peter Parker.” Sweety! Use your made-up name! “Hey, Peter Parker, you got something for me?” And it’s confident and badass, but you know what’s even more badass? FUCKING A-FORCE! “Don’t worry. She has help.” FUCK YEAH! Every single female in the MCU (minus Widow)! I love it so much. I wish we could’ve had a single frame where all of the ladies are visible, but it was still so awesome. And Captain Marvel is charging towards La Cucaracha van and is about to win until the purple toad throws the other half of his big sword into the back of the van. Jerk. Doctor Strange takes a hand away from dealing with the water (which...isn’t doing anything. Yay?) to tell Tony, “1.”

Now we get to play keep away on a smaller stage. Thanos vs Carol is badass. She doesn’t even flinch when he headbutts her. So fucking awesome. But then he cheats and pulls out the power stone (that hurts to hold but not the blue stone in infinity war? okay) to punch her. That does it and takes her out, then Thor and Cap try and team up but he throws them off and give Steve a massive headache. He puts on the glove and is about to snap his fingers--but Tony swoops in at the last second. And we know he’s no match. We’ve seen him lose to the purple gorilla twice! So what’s he gonna, oh. Nanotechnology to the rescue. Unfortunately, the suit was not designed to hold 6 Infinity Stones, so while Tony stays conscious enough to spout a great one-liner “And I...am...Iron Man,” and snap his fingers, that’s it. Thanos and his entire army are dust. ...I’m sure it’s fine. Like, get fucked, but...time travel? Anyway, Tony is...he’s done. He’s only human. Thanos is...a big alien. Hulk is...a big monster. Stark is...Iron Man. It’s at this point my roommate is sobbing into my arm. And I can hear sniffles in the theater until the end of the movie. 

Rhodey finds Tony first, and I thought he was already dead, not going to lie. Tony can’t do anything. He can’t move, blinking isn’t happening, his eyes are very unfocused. One might assume he was dead. But then Peter comes in and, oh! If you weren’t already crying, now we have Peter telling Tony “we won” like Steve did all those years ago. But now it’s...it feels like Simba at the death of Mufasa. “HEEEEEELP! SOMEBODY! Anybody. Help.” And so Pepper comes to the Rescue (sorry, you’re right, not the time) and tells him, “it’s okay. We’ll be okay. You can rest now.” I don’t know if “we” is Pepper and Morgan, the Avengers, Earth/the galaxy, or the MCU, but man! This thing that Iron Man started 11 years ago is...it’s come into it’s own. And saying goodbye to Tony Stark, the man who’s been in almost as many MCU movies as Stan Lee, to RDJ, the man who is Tony Stark in his early trials and path to redemption, to Iron Man, the superhero who gave us hope in a world of bad Marvel movies, is hard. 

And then we have a funeral because we really needed it. Tony gets a last speech of “if I die, I still love you.” WE LOVE YOU 3000! And then we get everyone standing around for the funeral for Tony and no one else. (Black Widow? Gamora? Loki? No? Why not?) Pepper lays down a wreath with the “Proof that Tony Stark has a Heart” and we have a tracking shot of pain. Pepper, Happy, Morgan and Steve. Ant-Mans and Wasps. Gaurdians of the Galaxy minus Gamora. T’Challa, Okoye and Shuri. The Barton Family. Bucky, Falcon and Wanda. THAT KID FROM IM3! Maria Hill and Gen. Ross. Captain Marvel. And then Nicholas J. Fury with Coulson standing behind him. And Morgan wants cheeseburgers! And Happy’s gonna give them to her!!!!! DON’T MAKE ME CRY AT CHEESEBURGERS, RUSSOS! 

Thor gives Valkyrie kingship over New Asgard (which is awesome) and dicks off with the Guardians. Barton retires, for good this time. And Cap’s going back in time to put all the stones back. I don’t know if that means the stones are still gone or back or what because...The Ancient One said something about we need all six to exist or catastrophe, but Thanos is an idiot so...idk. Anyway, Cap goes and gives the stones back and then decides to live the rest of his life with Peggy Carter because apparently he’s still not over her. I thought he kinda was. He started dating Sharon or something, right? You know what, it’s cute and adorable. Anyway, Steve’s old now and passes on a fixed shield to Sam. Bucky’s perfectly okay with it, and I am too. Captain Falcon and Bucky? I like it. Might not be the dynamic duo that Captain America and Bucky were, but still good. And then the credits roll and the og Avengers sign their names and we’re all clapping and cheering and crying and it’s so beautiful.

This movie...you know. If you’re reading this, you’ve already seen the movie, so you know. You know how good it is. It’s not perfect. The beginning is slow, some of the jokes don’t land and some people don’t like where the Russos took certain characters. “Steve shouldn’t have gone to live with Peggy!” “How dare they kill off Tony!” “They fridged Natasha! It should’ve been Clint!” “I don’t like that they made Thor a joke! FAT PEOPLE AREN’T FUNNY EVER!” “Ronin was stupid!” “I couldn’t look at Hulk!” “Captain Marvel needed more screen time!” “Captain Marvel had too much screen time!” “TIME TRAVEL!” SHUT UP! 

Look, the movie isn’t perfect, but if you want to constantly bitch about this movie, go watch CinemaSins. This movie is great. Not perfect, but great. It is epic. It is grand. It is a finale for the ages. We the fans have seen the movies, made the fanfiction, bought the merch and just enjoyed the heck out of this massive franchise for the past 11 years. We wanted an ending of monumental proportions and that’s what we got. I’m not going to defend their take on how Thor was funny because he was fat. I’m not going to say Steve should or shouldn’t have married Peggy. I’m not going to say who should have died or not died. I am at peace. Because this is a great movie. Not a good one, a great one. It ties up so many plot points and character arcs from Iron Man and brings it back for us to enjoy. We love this movie because they loved us. And if you disagreed with something, Archive of Our Own is always taking new fanfic. We’ll read it and enjoy it, but right now, I want to enjoy a cup of cocoa to drown my sorrows in. This has been a journey of epic proportions, but my tears are still coming and I’d like to read some happy fanfic. I’ll see you on the flip side, nerds, for a new live blogging series. Later.

Endgame Spoilers

Sorry, had to delete the original version of this because I tried to make an edit on my phone and it messed up my formatting. So this post is full of massive spoilers for Endgame. Seriously. Don’t open it if you’ve not seen the movie yet - it’s not going to make sense to you anyway. If you have seen it and you’re confused by some of the sci-fi mechanics of the movie, this might help...

Alright I’m seeing a lot of confusion around what is happening with the time travel in Endgame, so I’m going to do my best to explain my understanding of how it works. This is based on one viewing that took place at midnight, so there are almost certainly mistakes. I hope you’ll forgive me for them.

Time travel in stories works in many different ways, here are some of the main ones:

A. Back to the Future style – changing events in the past changes the future, BUT doesn’t change you. So when you go forwards in time again you might find you no longer exist or your Mum has married an asshole, and you’re aware these things have changed. B. Almost Back to the Future style (sorry can’t think of a good example for this) – changing events in the past changes the future and does affect you. This could mean the future version of you just vanishes or you become a different person. Basically that future is wiped out but the actions relating to time travel that you took in that future still must have happened. It’s a paradox but we roll with it. The possible negative consequences of this for the time-travelling version of you are pretty limitless, but on a positive you’ll never know about them.

C. The Azkaban Approach – this is how time travel exists in the Harry Potter universe (we do not speak of Cursed Child). Basically you cannot change the past/present/future by time travel. Whatever happens has already happened. You may, however, have to make sure those things happen.

D. The Discworld Dilemma (sorry, I can’t resist alliteration) – basically history wants to happen how it’s supposed to happen, although you might try to change things it will basically begin to heal itself one way or another – unless wizards, Death, gods or mystical monks living in the mountains get involved. This is more or less how Doctor Who works too.

E. Multi-verse Mechanics – basically every possible action every person in the universe is taking is creating infinite other alternate versions of that universe ALL THE TIME. When you change something by time travel you end up in a different alternate. I guess this is really similar to A/B depending on what happens to the you skipping between the universes – it’s just a different way of thinking about it.

In the movie they specifically say that A and B won’t work – because this movie-verse won’t allow time-paradoxes. Version D also clearly doesn’t work. And we can rule out E based on the Ancient One’s comments to Bruce about parallel realities being BAD and damaging your current universe (although that in itself raises issues with a lot of other comic-verse stuff). I’m going to come back to C later. Which leaves us with what Endgame is doing:

F. Personal timelines must be linear – i.e. your personal timeline may take place in lots of different timeframes, going backwards and forwards in time, without issue UNLESS you affect a past version of yourself. In that case the A and B paradox issues kicks in and, as you may end up not being the version of you that went time travelling in the first place, you (and the universe) is probably fucked.    - This is why they can’t bring the dusted back until after they complete the actions to reverse Thanos’ actions – i.e. you couldn’t have them dusted and un-dusted instantaneously. Because if you did that none of the things that happened in the intervening five years would happen and you wouldn’t become the people with the capability to undo the dusting and then you have a massive paradox.    - Obviously it’s more complicated than just your personal actions, because any person who’s actions you change could end up altering the course of the future. Even moving an object a few feet could have massive unseen consequences.    - This means that during the time travel heist the least interaction with the past they can manage the better. For example, if Steve had gone into the lift and killed or seriously hurt any of the hydra agents – that could easily change the future, because that person could have done something in the future that contributed to the circumstances in the present etc...    - Because of this there is absolutely no way for people, primarily Steve, to go back and alter historical issues in his own timeline - i.e. he can’t stop the rise of Hyrda or save Bucky any earlier without fucking up the entire universe.

The team’s inability to not alter anything in the past and (possibly) their active decisions to change things obviously presents us with some issues, here are some of the ones I’ve seen discussed/was confused by myself and how/if they’re resolved in the story: 

- Thanos and his chums – Thanos going forward to the future before he ever used the infinity stones and then being destroyed obviously creates a massive paradox. Luckily Tony is more than smart enough to realise this, so we can assume that what he actually did was send Thanos and his army back to before they intercepted Nebula’s consciousness. This puts all of Infinity Wars/Endgame into a fixed time-loop that will always play out the same. Although I can understand the symbolic significance of making what happened look like the dusting, I sort of wish they’d given it a green glow or mentioned the time loop or something to make this clearer. [RESOLVED – though not firmly stated in the movie]**

- The stones/Mjolnir not being where they need to be. Presumably we just need to accept Steve’s mission has put all this right, although I don’t remember him having anything big enough to be carrying the sceptre (it was 3am though, so maybe there was) – so we’re going to just have to imagine how he restored all the stones to their former states. [RESOLVED]

- Present-Steve telling Past-Steve about Bucky – luckily this was an easy fix as he was holding the mind stone at the time and we see him use it to wipe Steve’s memory of the encounter. [RESOLVED]

- Loki vanishing with the tesseract – both versions of the tesseract we see in this movie need to be put back and whilst the Shield base version is *relatively* simple (let’s not ask how many Steve Roger’s are running about New York at a time), Loki’s is not - this one we don’t see resolved in this story. We could assume that Steve fixes it during his mission, using the tesseract he has to track down Loki before returning it to the Shield base. However, I think it’s more likely we will see the solution to this either in the Loki tv show or Guardian’s 3. [UNRESOLVED]

- Impact of knocking out Quill/Tony’s heart attack/the lift people thinking Steve is Hydra etc. – basically I could see ways that all the “small” changes we see in the movie could have fundamentally important impacts. Tony thinking his heart is failing? Wouldn’t that impact his behaviour afterwards? Quill waking up and realising he was randomly unconscious for an unknown length of time? None of this is really resolved in the story, but we’re just going to have to assume it didn’t really as the universe didn’t explode. [RESOLVED???]

- Steve marrying Peggy – I think this is the one I’ve seen most people frustrated by, because it seems the hugest change, and this is where I’m coming back to C. I think the Azkaban Approach is in play here, with a side order of Doctor/River weirdness. Steve ALWAYS married Peggy. I went back and watched their meeting in the hospice again last night and if you look at her pictures on the bedside table, there are pictures of her with her kids but not her husband, BECAUSE her husband is Steve and they knew they couldn’t risk having photos of him on display/anyone finding out. The Peggy we see in that hospital bed knows she can’t tell that version of Steve they were married, because he hasn’t defeated Thanos yet. And she knows she has to allow him to suffer and lose everyone and defeat Thanos because the future-Steve that came back in time to marry her, told her about it. There’s the River and Doctor weirdness for you, their timelines are not in sync, they meet each other out of order (for Peggy at any rate) but with secrecy and carefulness they can make it work. And they know they can make it work because they already did. I love it but I can understand it’s a bit of a head-fuck. And, of course, there are cruelties to it. Steve can’t tackle Hydra taking over Shield or Bucky being tortured because if he does it causes a paradox and the universe is destroyed. That must be terrible but at least that version of Steve knows how it all works out, knows he left Bucky healthy and happy and as much at peace as it is possible to be. [RESOLVED – at least for me]

OK – what did I miss? What still doesn’t make any sense? Any other thoughts? – Although please be careful to tag things properly if commenting, so people don’t get accidentally spoilt.

** Extra note – I have seen a lot of discussion about where Endgame leaves Gamora and basically we don’t know. Which is cool. It all comes down to how Tony worded/understood his use of the infinity stones. If he wished everyone who was out of time back to their correct times, she’s gone and probably trapped in the time loop (although now time travel is an active super hero skill, who knows). If it was more along the lines of him sending the people they were fighting against back to their correct times, the fact that she had already switched times might have saved her. She’ll still be past-Gamora but she’s out there in the present somewhere.

Walking The Wire (89/?)

Summary: Tony Stark always knew about Peter Parker. He didn’t know that Peter was going to get superpowers and become Spider-Man, but he always knew about Peter because Peter was his son.

This will span from pre-Iron Man up through the rest of the MCU (eventually including Infinity War) and will be for the most part canon compliant except where I’ve taken some liberties and interpreted canon a certain way.

Pairings: Pepper/Tony, Tony/Steve (endgame), Tony/Mary (past)

A/N: If you want me to tag you when I post new chapters let me know. This fic is also on AO3

I used Collider’s MCU timeline to stay canon and the title of this fic is an Imagine Dragons song that is just so fitting for Peter and Tony

Masterpost

Chapter Eighty Eight

They watched Back To The Future when they got back to the den complete with bowls of popcorn and Tony had even gotten out a couple of blankets for them which just built up how cozy, comfortable, and easy the night had to be.

Peter had watched the first movie only once before with Ben and May and it was a good one. He liked that it was something he had already watched -- something entertaining that he didn’t have to necessarily put all of his attention on. His mind just kept drifting back to being under all that concrete and how in that moment he had wanted Tony -- he had wanted his dad -- because somehow he always just seemed to be there to help him and save him and make things better and he just hadn’t disappointed.

It made him just a tad embarrased now, to think on how he had been yelling and how easily he’d slipped into calling Tony dad in those moments. He sort of -- he wanted to keep doing it.

“You’re thinking kind of loudly over there,” Tony said.

Peter sighed and turned to look at him. Tony hadn’t even pulled out his phone or tablet like Peter had expected him to because Tony nearly always needed to be doing something with his hands. Instead, he was actually watching the movie.

“I’m -- I called you dad,” Peter said.

“You did,” Tony said. “I don’t mind.”

“Oh,” Peter said and he smiled a little. “I think -- maybe I’d--”

“You can call me whatever you want, Pete,” Tony said and he reached over and squeezed his wrist.

Peter was warmed by the easy way that Tony just breezed past the awkwardness that Peter felt and just made everything seem okay. Made it seem normal.

“I’ve never had a real dad,” Peter whispered. “Ben was always just Ben and I don’t really remember Richard all that well but you’re -- you’re really my dad. You know?”

“I know,” Tony said and smiled at him. His eyes looked maybe a tad misty, but Peter couldn’t really tell and then they both turned back to the movie.

Peter fell asleep a few minutes into the second Back To The Future which made it easier to just watch him and not the movie as Tony had been doing. Eventually, he turned it off and shifted Peter into a better position on the couch and hoped that he’d stay comfortable. He fixed the blanket over him and then just lingered and watched him. He looked even younger while he slept.

Tony wasn’t tired. And even if he was, he just knew that sleep wasn’t going to come easily. Instead, he went and reviewed everything that the FBI agents from earlier had left after they finished their inspection. He was sure Pepper had taken care of all of it already, but he just wanted to see what they had left behind. Then, he grabbed a tablet and sat down and got to work on some designs for SI. Every once in awhile he looked up and found himself just staring at Peter. His bruises had faded and his hair had dried floppily on his head.

It was a while later, when Tony got up to get a drink that he heard Peter scream. He rushed back. Peter had pushed away his blanket and it pooled on the ground next to him. Peter whimpered and gasped and his head went from side to side. He almost rolled off the sofa, but Tony pushed him back on it and he dropped to his knees next to Peter and shook him gently.

“Peter, Peter, wake up.”

He shook him a little again. Peter’s forehead creased and he groaned and then he woke up slowly, eyes looking everywhere in confusion but wide and with just a tinge of fear in them.

“You’re okay,” Tony said and he placed a hand on each side of his face to keep him from moving too much. “You’re okay.”

“A building fell on me,” Peter said. His voice was soft and a little breathy.

Tony nodded.

“You came for me.”

“I did.”

His breathing slowed down and then Peter just wrapped his arms around Tony’s shoulders. “Thank you,” he said.

“We’ve been over this already, kiddo,” Tony said.

“No. For -- for being here now,” Peter said as he pulled away, moving so that Tony could sit next to him. “Can we just keep watching the movie?”

“Sure, kid.”

Peter scooted close to Tony as Tony put the movie back on and then after a few minutes, Peter leaned his head on Tony’s arm. Tony lifted his arm and wrapped it around Peter’s shoulders and he could tell that they both needed this. Peter let out a sigh and moved closer and Tony couldn’t help but smile.

“Three more days,” Sam announced.

They were in Wakanda and this time, Steve had brought everyone with him. Sam more than any of the others seemed amazed by the place. He just didn’t seem to be able to believe that a place like Wakanda could exist in their world. Natasha as always kept her reaction low key and invited herself to train with the Dora Milaje as soon as she could. She and Okoye hit it off. Nevertheless, they were all excited to be heading home.

Wanda for her part just kept to herself -- quiet and reserved possibly because she knew that she was responsible for the deaths of some Wakandians even if it hadn’t been intentional.

Their trip to Wakanda had become necessary once the UN decided that they could go back to the states. But before they could do so they had to sign The New Accords. T’Challa had offered Wakanda for the signing and Steve had been grateful because he knew that once the papers were signed they would go to a hearing in New York City and their punishments would be doled out. They all knew that it was going to be house arrest -- they just didn’t know what the length of their punishment would be. Going to Wakanda to sign gave Steve the option of seeing Bucky before they went back. Another goodbye because it really seemed like they were destined to be torn apart. Maybe that would change in the future.

Bucky’s whole situation was one that Tony and T’Challa didn’t want to bring up yet. There was too much that he had done as The Winter Soldier and too much to risk by trying to get him cleared of his charges just yet. Tony hadn’t said it -- but he was still a little bit sore about his parents too and it was certainly a factor in him not trying harder. Steve didn’t resent him for it. Bucky was happier in Wakanda irregardless and Steve didn’t know if Bucky would even want to leave a place where he’d finally found some peace. He loved the people and he loved his hut and just everything about his daily life in Wakanda. There wasn’t a fight for him to engage in and he could just learn to become himself. Steve could tell how well he was doing there.

“I know,” Steve said. “I can’t believe it.”

“Tony really did it. It’s been barely four months,” Sam said. “Not that I’ve been counting or anything.”

They were all a bit shocked at how well everything had gone. It was just crazy because normally things didn’t work out in this manner quick and without anything going wrong. It almost made Steve suspicious except that Tony was behind it all and he could trust Tony. Steve had been expecting to stay on the run for the next year at least and somehow that just wasn’t the case. It wasn’t going to be amazing to be stuck at the tower for however long the US government and the UN felt that he might need to be, but he’d be with Tony. He’d be home and that would be enough. Not that any of it would actually matter if there was a real threat.

“His boyfriend’s involved -- of course he’s getting us all back there,” Natasha said as she walked towards them. “And I don’t doubt that he has plans to make house arrest easy and fun.”

Michelle had tried to enjoy the rest of the dance, but since she didn’t really like anyone that was in attendance and it wasn’t really her thing in the first place, it just hadn’t felt all that fun. Still, she had gotten what she went for which was to see Peter leave early. She hadn’t expected it to happen so early on -- basically with his arrival -- but it had and Ned had gone off too soon after. Michelle had considered following but that had felt like really doing a bit too much.

They had all seen Ned come back later on, though, with his hat held in his hands and looking like he didn’t know how to act. He stayed mostly on his own, constantly checking his phone and looking worried.

Michelle had tried to approach him and talk to him about it, but he was just too distracted and then eventually Ned just went home, leaving much earlier than anyone else and Michelle felt like she should go home too so she called her mom and got picked up.

The weekend felt long and no one reported on anything to do with Spider-Man although someone said that Iron Man was sighted somewhere in Brooklyn. Then, it came out that Liz’s dad had been arrested. No one knew exactly why he’d been arrested, but it had apparently been something big. It happened the night of the dance which seemed just a little suspicious. Maybe even connected to Peter leaving the dance early.

The other thing that happened that night was that Spider-Man stole Flash’s dad’s car. It was a little hilarious because Flash and his date had walked into the dance stunned and then Flash had started telling everyone that he’d lent the car to Spider-Man. Except that Rita who had agreed to go with him for some reason or another just told a different story entirely -- a more believable story -- about how Spider-Man had demanded the car and Flash’s phone and then taken off. But more importantly, she had also mentioned that Flash had been pissed off about the whole thing especially when Spider-Man did some damage to the car as he left. All in all, Michelle had been pretty amused.

By the time that Monday came around mostly everyone knew about Liz’s dad. They also knew about the state in which the car had been found.

Michelle almost expected to not see Peter at all on Monday, but he walked in with Ned at his side and Ned seemed to be pestering Peter about something again.

She felt some relief to see Peter and to see that he was actually okay, but she still didn’t try to talk to him about the whole thing. Instead she watched him from afar for the next few days. She even saw him when Liz showed up to pick up her things with her mom. They all knew that she was leaving and Michelle didn’t blame her. Michelle left them be while they talked and was surprised when Mr. Harrington approached her.

“With Liz having to leave the school year early, I was hoping you would take on the mantle of team captain,” Mr. Harrington said.

“I -- really? Me?”

Mr. Harrington nodded. “Yeah, well the other real choice is Ned and I think you’d be better at it.”

“Um, sure. Yeah. I’ll do it.”

“Good. Good. We’ll meet up today like planned and we can let everyone else know then.”

Michelle nodded. She hoped that Peter would show up because they really did need him to stick around for the team and show up to future competitions. They all knew how smart Peter was and with Liz gone they would definitely be needing Peter if they were going to have any kind of chance at next year’s nationals.

When Ned and Peter did show up to the meeting, Michelle pretended to not be relieved.

“Congratulations, Decathlon National champions,” Mr. Harrington said.

Everyone was cheering and happy. Peter clapped along with everyone else even though they all knew that he had skipped out on the competition. How the rest of the team hadn’t figured out that that meant that Peter had to be Spider-Man kind of boggled Michelle especially since they were all supposed to be smart. They really did not notice much, did they?

“I’ll have to put this back in the trophy case soon but just for motivation right now at this practice we’ll have it out here. I’m ahead of the game, but we will need a new team captain. So I am appointing Michelle.”

Everyone started cheering and clapping. Peter who was sat in front of her smiled at her and Michelle tried not to let them all know how much she appreciated their reaction.

“Thank you,” she said. “My-- My friends call me MJ, though.”

“I thought you didn’t have any friends,” Ned said because it was Ned.

Michelle looked at Ned and then Peter and she ducked her head. “I didn’t,” she said.

Peter smiled when Michelle looked back up and then he fished out his phone when it rang. “I have to go,” he said and looked genuinely apologetic.

“Hey,” Michelle said as he stood up. “Where are you going?”

The others were distracted and not even paying attention except for Ned, but that didn’t matter.

“What are you hiding, Peter?” Michelle asked.

Peter looked like a deer caught in headlights, like he couldn’t believe that Michelle had just asked that question. He didn’t even seem to know how to respond.

“I’m just kidding,” Michelle said. “I don’t care.”

“Um, okay. Bye.”

He rushed away and Michelle turned back to the group. “Um, we should get some practice in.”

Ned nudged her and looked dead serious with his eyes narrowed on her. It was almost comical. “What do you know?”

Michelle shrugged and smirked to herself when she looked away.

Chapter Ninety

A Captain America: the First Avenger Timeline for Fic Writers

(I’m so sorry I erased the original post I’M SO SORRY! You can read this without the visual aids on AO3.)

March 10, 1917 - James Buchanan Barnes is born, and we were all officially fucked.

July 4, 1918 - Steven Grant Rogers is born, and somewhere in Brooklyn Bucky's mother wept . . .

June, 1924 - Steve's mother is bedridden from illness associated with Tuberculosis.

September, 1930 - 12-year old Steve and 13-year old Bucky meet for the first time in Hell's Kitchen, where Bucky scares off bullies trying to steal Steve's money. What were they doing in Hell's Kitchen? No one knows. Steve tells Bucky he's been living in the orphanage 'on 8th' since his mother's death. Which is odd since Bucky was apparently at her funeral when they're both legal adults in a flashback scene from the Winter Soldier. For the purpose of this timeline, info from the movies will take precedent over info from the various tie-ins. Meaning Sarah Rogers is basically Schrödinger's Ma for the next 6 years.

1936 - Shrodinger's Ma finally actually dies fo sho of Tuberculosis. Bucky breaks everyone and their mother's heart with his 'til the end of the line' line. (Also, per MCU canon, Bucky's 'folks' are still alive . . . and own a car.)

February ish, 1940 - Colonel Phillips first approaches Howard Stark, in Los Angeles, about working for the SSR. (Stark Industries was formed in 1939, and 'a year later' Howard is at a nightclub in West Hollywood called Ciro's, demonstrating the properties of Vibranium. Ciro's opened in January of 1940. So keeping in line with the MCU canon and with real world history, as you do, January 1940 is the absolute earliest that Howard could have been recruited.) They're pursued and Stark deploys rockets from the ass-end of his car to escape them because Howard Stark.

Agent Margaret "Peggy" Carter, aka Agent 13 is already in deep cover working for Schmidt as a maid in his personal mansion.

November, 1940 - Peggy rescues Dr. Erskine from Schmidt's mansion two days after Johann Schmidt forces him to inject the experimental serum, proving that we all could have saved a lot of time if Peggy had done that three fucking days earlier, Jesus.

May 25, 1941 - Steve goes to the Dodgers-Phillies game at Ebbets Field. Was Bucky with him? We don't fucking know. It was a Sunday, so maybe. It’s not like Steve knew other people . . .

December 7, 1941 - Steve and Bucky are in an art class - like . . . how can anyone write these two as dirt poor when they're fucking around on their Sundays at baseball games and art classes? By this point the economy was booming as the work force was being drafted left and right, these two would not have been in need of jobs. And two Irish-Catholics (honestly, Bucky is probably Scottish, lbr) skipping church? tsk tsk - when the class is informed by a runner that Pearl Harbor has been attacked.

Okay real talk here, for a second. The draft officially started in 1940, pulling men 21 years of age and older. In 1940, Bucky was 23. He was single, no kids. He absolutely could not have given conscientious objector status as a way to avoid it because if he had, when he was drafted later on he never would have seen combat. He should have been drafted in '40 or '41. The only reasons he wouldn't have been was if he was a student, or if both his parents and/or his siblings were considered his dependents. Since some sources say both Bucky and Steve were orphans, then it is entirely plausible that both Bucky's parents died close to the time Bucky turned 19 or 20, in which case he could have become the legal guardian of his younger siblings.

PS: Bucky is not an orphan in the MCU (nor is he poor in that suit, jfc):

So either Bucky was working like a damn dog supporting his family, in which case the fuck are you doing in an art class, kiddo? Or he was actually a student at a college or university.

.....he could also have, during the years the US was gearing up in case they were forced into the conflict, held a job that was considered vital to the coming war effort. This sort of deferment was limited to jobs in war production, and jobs that involved national 'health, safety, or interest'. Literally the only job I can think of without actually like . . . researching it, that Bucky could have been in where he would have been skipped the first few times but taken in '42, is if he had been a police officer. That would fit very well with his ability with a gun, plus explain why he made sergeant so fucking fast, with prior training other inductees would not have had.

Considering what a golden child Bucky was in Brooklyn, all three of those scenarios would be a perfectly valid reason for Bucky to have avoided the first several waves of conscription. Just thought that was interesting.

Anyway! Steve wants to enlist right away, so Bucky (a three-time YMCA welterweight boxing champion, suck it) trains him for two whole weeks because Bucky is apparently of the opinion that Steve is an idiot who won't get in anyway so why fucking bother going hard.

*at the time, under the regulations of the New York State Athletic Commission, welterweight was a weight class of 147 to >160 pounds. Meaning post-war Bucky gained about 40 pounds of pure muscle after getting the serum....dude.

December 24, 1941 - Bucky is right and Steve's first attempt to enlist fails so hard. Go to Midnight Mass, Steven.

March, 1942 - Red Skull fucks shit up in Tønsberg, Norway and finds the Tesseract.

September 21, 1942 - Bucky receives his draft card, and takes it to an intake facility and enlists in the US Army. The following dates are literally nowhere in canon, but I have research to back up what is essentially pure speculation on my part. His serial number is 32557038. There is a real world counterpart who actually had this particular serial number, and he was enlisted on this date. So, in order for Bucky to have gotten to the number before this guy, Bucky probably woke up early Monday morning to get shit done.

Desperate Historian's Note: I always assumed that since he was a Sergeant when he first shipped out, Bucky had been in service for at least a year and a half, which is still pushing it within the constraints of the timeline. Most NCO's at the start of US involvement in the War, Corporals and Sergeants, already had years of Army service under their belts. But no. 9 months. So. Bucky basically kicked ass and took names to become a Sergeant in 9 months of non-combat training (which took place at Camp McCoy, Wisconsin btw). That, or every NCO in his regiment came down with a sudden case of the Deads and he got promoted.....Bucky would have needed a special recommendation from the company commander - TWICE in 9 months - to reach that rank. Jesus. It is canon fact that Bucky was indeed an absolutely phenomenal soldier (and leader) . . .

He would have been sent to basic training and been gone for ten weeks, meaning it would have been over by the 1st of December, 1942, or thereabouts.

December 1, 1942 - Give or take a week or two, maybe, depending on how quickly he was whisked away after enlistment, Bucky would have been given a week's furlough after training at Camp McCoy ended.

December 8, 1942 - Since he is a designated marksman (not a sniper, the US Army didn't have those in WWII. A designated marksman was just a guy in a regiment who was an excellent shot and stuck with their regiment at all times and was used situationally, never went off alone to shoot people in the head and stuff), he absolutely would not have been sent to any sort of sniper training because, again, the US did not have those in WWII. He wouldn't have stayed in NYC, though.

He would have been on an Army base somewhere, with the occasional week-long furlough to return home. There were 114 mobilization camps by 1942, and only three of those in New York state; Madison Barracks, Camp Upton, and Pine Camp, with three more in New Jersey; Fort Dix, Fort Monmouth, and Camp Shanks. 17 were in California, 14 in Texas. Anyway. So, before Bucky leaves for war, he and Steve wouldn't have seen a whole lot of each other for the year before that, either.

June 7, 1943 - Bucky probably arrives in NYC on a final week's furlough before being sent to War. With the way Steve looks at him when he sees the uniform later on, and Bucky's cocky little head tilt, it's probably safe to say Bucky received his sergeant's chevrons not long before this furlough. (Honestly . . . I have never understood this part. Bucky damn well knew he was 107th from the moment he reported, and Steve should have as well. Also, ‘getting his orders’ had nothing to do with his uniform, soldiers were required to wear that shit everywhere they went. Unless Steve knew he’d gotten his orders simply because he was there and shouldn’t have been....whatever, movie exposition, blah blah)

June 14, 1943 - Steve's fifth attempt to enlist fails spectacularly because he had to claim to be from New Jersey. He then goes to get the shit kicked out of him in an alley behind a movie theater, that's what you get for saying you're from Jersey, Steven. He and Bucky attend the Stark Expo that evening, where Steve ghosts like an asshole - even though for all he knows this is literally the last time he will ever see Bucky alive!! - and is chosen by Dr. Erskine as a candidate for Project: Rebirth.

June 15, 1943 - Bucky and the 107th ship out for 'England'. Now, the troop transport Queen Mary left NYC on June 1, 1943, heading for Gourock, Scotland and carrying the 1077th Signal Company Service Group. It took 5 days; they arrived on June 6, 1943. On July 16, 1943, the Edmund B. Alexander carried 5,000 replacement troops to Liverpool, England. That journey took ten days; they made land on July 26, 1943. Maybe. The records are full of literal question marks, so I dunno. That's the closest thing I can find to Bucky's stated journey. Most of the troops leaving from NYC at this period were actually heading for Africa, landing in Casablanca, Morocco.

I know Bucky says he's shipping out for England in the morning, but it makes so much more sense that the 107th would have been sent to Africa and then swept up into Italy in the next four months of fighting, where Steve finds them later. It would be easy to deal with this by either saying Bucky's an idiot, or (my recommendation) that Bucky knew exactly where he was heading and he just wasn't telling Steve that he was being sent into the heart of the brutal African and Italian campaigns rather than a nice balmy Liverpool in the summer. The journey from NYC to Casablanca, Morocco would have been anywhere from 11-15 days.

June 20-25, 1943 - Bucky would have hit Liverpool, England right around this time, if that's the way he was sent.

June 25-30, 1943 - Bucky would have docked in Casablanca, Morocco, if this is the way it went instead. So I guess you could safely say he made landfall in the European Theater on June 25, 1943? Haha right in time for Mussolini to get his ass arrested and the Italian Fascist government to fall.

June 22, 1943 - Steve is injected with the super-soldier serum, right Steven? (Meaning he only had a week of basic training, at most, and everything else he knows about being a soldier he taught himself with all those books he brought to Camp Lehigh with him.)

September, 1943 - Ugh, okay, history nerds cover your ears, because there is just no way to make the real invasion of Italy match up with the MCU invasion of Italy. Unless the 107th just said fuck those guys and marched right into German territory past the . . . bombs and stuff. On September 9, there were Allied landings at Salerno and Taranto, Italy, and they didn’t enter Naples until October 1. I mean, is it really all that shocking that they got their asses kicked in Azzano? NO. But having a fucking USO show that deep into Italy means the MCU said fuck it, so you too can say fuck it when it comes to the real WW2 timeline in Italy, idfc. This is apparently what the MCU lines looked like at this point in time, and let me just tell you, see that bulge there, right under the Hydra flag? Those fuckers would have been surrounded and cut off so fast, so fast, just like in Bastogne. Assholes....anyway.

October, 1943 - The Battle of Azzano results in Hydra declaring war on anything that moves, including Nazis, and takes prisoners from various different regiments that historically were either still in training or in the Pacific Theater at this point, but that's fine. Prisoners are taken over 120 km away to a Hydra weapons factory in Kreischberg, Austria, where their Hydra captors separate the men into cages according to their nationality and other factors. The purpose of this is for the bickering hodgepodge of Allied soldiers to keep each other busy with in-fighting so the Hydra guards can forget to train and get beat up by Captain America in a month or so.

Dum Dum Dugan almost immediately makes a joke while Cage Team Howling Commando is introducing themselves, and a brawl breaks out. As you do.

In Bucky's cage are the following:

Jacques "Frenchie" Dernier, French Resistance, born January 2, 1911 (32). The fuck was your French ass doing in northwestern Italy, son? To my knowledge the French Resistance kind of worked mainly . . . in France. The Italian Resistance was very active in this period, so they could have been collaborating, but that's not what the Resistance did, mostly. So the only logical conclusion we can come to with Frenchie is that he was captured somewhere in France by Hydra and transported to the factory as labor. He lived in Marseilles before the War, and likely would have stayed close to it.

Major James Montgomery "Monty" Falsworth, born January 2, 1914 (29), of the British 3rd Independent Parachute Brigade, which historically first saw action in June of 1944, ha. Anyway, Monty was from Birmingham, England and was known in the comics as Union Jack, and the pin on his beret is a nod to that. Teeeechnically? Monty outranks Steve, but since they're not even part of the same Army, that's kind of a moot point. He winds up with the rank of Brigadier, which wtf, that means he outranked Colonel Phillips when the war ended . . . four for you, Monty.

Private Gabe Jones, born August 14, 1918 (25), was 92nd Infantry Division, a segregated unit that historically first saw action in September of 1944, haha. Gabe was from Macon, Georgia and was fluent in French and German thanks to pre-war studies at Howard University. Just as proficient in hand-to-hand as the others, he was often part of the team’s frontal assaults, as well as handling the radios . . . and he boned Peggy Carter in the comics.

Corporal Timothy 'Dum Dum' Dugan, born April 11, 1912 (31), was a member of the 69th Infantry Regiment, which is also known as the 165th or Fighting Irish, recruited solely from NYC, who were making landfall in the Pacific right about now. Frustrated historian's note: Had he been a real boy, Bucky Barnes would have been enlisted into the 69th Infantry as well, just like Dugan. Canon-wise it makes sense that Bucky and Dugan were from the same unit, even though canon thinks they weren't because canon made up the WWII-era 107th? Anyway, the fact that both Dugan and Bucky were in the same foxhole when the Hydra tank hits in the cut scene from First Avenger is all fucked up because you don't put your NCOs where they can be blown up together, okay. It's bad strategy. Add to that the fact that Dugan calls him Bucky like they've been buddies for a while, but the tie-in comic is still on 'Jimmy' and also states that Dugan and Barnes were in the same company after all, that cut scene is frustrating. Or I guess the comic is frustrating? Something's frustrating, anyway. I think the best way to deal with this is just to say that the 107th IS the Fighting Irish regiment because fuck it. Dugan will eventually take over leading the team when Steve goes splat, leading the Howling Commandos and being involved with SHIELD, and Nick Fury personally, well into the Cold War.

Private Jim Morita, born October 20, 1919 (24) - also, Happy Birthday here's a Hydra weapon NOW ASSEMBLE IT - wasn't in the same cage as the others, but he served in the US Army's Nisei Squadron as a Ranger, aka the 442nd Regimental Combat Team. Their real fight in the European Theater began in June of 1944, so who the fuck knows how his ass wound up in Austria. And since the whole unit was made up of men of Japanese descent, it's safe to assume there's a 50/50 chance Morita was given the choice back in Fresno between enlisting and an internment camp. A lot of fics write Morita as the team medic, but I'm not entirely sure why. In WWII, medics held a rank of Private, Private First Class, or Technical Sergeant. So, the medic would either have needed to be Morita or Gabe Jones in keeping with this. But there is literally no canon mention of him being any better at triage than any of the others, and he is definitely not a medic by trade. None of them are. The more likely scenario here, because none of them wear the insignia of a combat medic, is that all of the team were equally trained and capable at the most basic of field triage, but the team itself probably flew without a safety net and used the medics from whatever regiment they were shadowing at the time.

Sergeant James Buchanan "Bucky" Barnes (26) - who you will notice is literally the fourth James in a team of 7 men - contracted what can only be assumed to be walking pneumonia on the battlefield of Azzano, and as his condition gets progressively worse in captivity, hastened by the hard labor of the weapons facility, he eventually becomes so weak that he drops several components in front of the officer in charge of the Facility, identified only as Colonel Lohmer. Lohmer beats Bucky like a rented mule, and when he's deposited back in his cage, the other four realize that if he's made to work again the next day, he'll die. They devise a plan to kill Lohmer, which would put one of the kinder Nazi assholes in charge who would allow Bucky to remain in the cages until he was able to recover. Their plan works, crushing Lohmer under a ton of machinery and symbolism and signifying the first time the soon-to-be Howling Commandos had worked together successfully. The soldiers return everyone to their cages after the accident to keep order, and Dugan tells Bucky that he's safe from Lohmer now, with the only punishment being a reduction of the POWs food rations for a week since there was no one specific to punish. Bucky is an ungrateful dick and not only asks Dugan to stop calling him "Jimmy", but graces him with the nickname Dum Dum in the process. Bucky is saved from dying on the manufacturing floor only to be singled out by Arnim Zola and taken to the 'examination rooms'. And we all know what happens there.

August to Early November, 1943 - Steve Rogers sings and dances his way through over 200 shows and makes several badly conceived films while his best friend is slogging his way through Italy.

November 3, 1943 - Steve disappears behind enemy lines to go find his Bucky.

November 8, 1943 - The Man With A Plan dramatically re-enters the Allied base camp where Colonel Phillips is fixin' to tear Peggy Carter a new one for losing Captain America over enemy territory. If the Battle of Azzano happened on a goddamn Earth map at the real Azzano in the Province of Udine, and assuming the Allied camp was somewhat close to that area, the march from the factory back to the Allied base camp would have been well over 120 kilometers as the crow flies. Those prisoners were metal af.

I'm getting that date from the assumption that walking over 120 km back to (supposedly because in reality they'd have needed to walk to goddamn Naples) Allied territory with 400 sick and wounded men would take a few fucking days. An American unit in Sicily in WWII (30th Infantry Division) marched 54 miles in 33 hours across country. But it's safe to assume that the company Steve rescues from Kreischberg would not be moving at top speed, but rather a steady pace that would keep them moving, but not fucking kill them.

The closest thing I can get to this incident is in July of 1944, when the German armies began a forced march of POWs across Germany to delay their liberation by the approaching Red Armies. Groups of 250 to 300 men marched over bombed out roads in a meandering route because they were forced to skirt around various battles, kind of like what our POWs would have to do in enemy territory. The groups would march between 20 to 40 kilometers a day, with very little food, clothing, shelter or medical care to speak of. Using 30 km/day as our benchmark, that's at least 4 days that it would have taken to get back to the Allied encampment. If the Hydra factory went boom on the night of November 3rd, and Steve flounced into camp in daylight, November 8th is a very safe bet.

November 15, 1943 - Steve pinpoints the Hydra facilities on the map in the SSR bunker in London (which was located in the Cabinet War Rooms in Whitehall) and is given permission to form his own elite special ops unit. Sidenote, the Howling Commandos were never called the Howling Commandos until after the War ended, they were merely called the 107th Tactical Team. Another nickname bandied about in 'non-canon because it contradicts the movie ahahahahahah' was The Invaders, which is probably what other soldiers would have known them as when encountering them. Neither Steve nor Bucky would know what the fuck a Howling Commando even is until they read up on history, and even then neither of them would likely ever think of himself as a Howling Commando.

Now, in trying to find this date, my inner frustrated historian has begun to weep, because I just cannot find a base in Italy that makes sense for any of these damn movements to have been based out of. The Allies hadn't even gotten through the Gustav Line at this point, which ran across the boot and through the town of Cassino, south of Rome. For them to be in Northern Italy close to the Austrian border, dude. WTF were they doing there? And how did they get in and out?? I mean was anyone really surprised when their straying asses got pounded by enemy forces deep in enemy territory??

I have no idea how to judge how long it would have taken for the future Commandos to get to London and drink in a pub because there is literally no rational logic to pinpoint their starting location, and therefore no way to guess what modes of transport were even available to them so close to enemy territory. The easiest way to find this date would have been to find out what date Captain America was awarded his Medal of Honor, but . . . even I'm not that good, apparently, 'cause I can't dig up shit. The Medal of Honor ceremony that happens at the same time as this scene would have been at least a week and probably more from the action on the night of November 3rd simply because it took that long for the paperwork to travel back to Washington. It was usually months before soldiers received their Purple Hearts, for instance. But let's assume this was fast-tracked because it's Captain goddamn America. Let's also assume they didn't have Howard Stark fly them back to London in his plane and tell the other 400 POWs to go make like a leaf and fuck a tree or something.

So the trip back to London probably took at least 7-10 days. We also need enough time to have passed that they expected Steve to get from the front lines all the way back to DC for the ceremony. My first instinct is to say up to a month could have passed when this scene comes around, but a month just seems way too long when looking at the context of the scenes, from the celebratory pub crawl of the POWs to the fact that Steve is being debriefed here, which would have been literally the first concern of an agency whose job is gathering intelligence.

TL:DR version, this could be anywhere from a week to a month later, idfk.

It's safe to assume this is also the night of the pub when Bucky reveals how heterosexual he is not by asking if Steve is going to keep his stage suit for no apparent good reason.

Mostly I'm putting this date here because it is the day the Allied Expeditionary Force for the invasion of Europe is officially formed. Having the SSR gearing up for - or as a result of - that meeting seems to make a lot of sense.

November 15, 1943 to March 4, 1945 - Steve and the Invaders, often along with other military forces, plow through HYDRA factories like an enraged ex with a John Deere tractor and a bottle of Jim Beam, and also join the larger battle against the Axis Powers on the Western Front. Essentially this period is Band of Broooos: Howling Commandos Edition. This period is where you can really have your fic fun, because canon doesn't tell us fuck all about it.

Well . . . that’s not necessarily true, though. Through the (paltry imo) Howling Commando montage of the movie, we see at least 10 distinct missions, and in clips from TWS there are hints of a few more; as many as 15 total. There are 6 Hydra facilities on the board, labeled 1-6. #4 was never taken during Steve’s time. But we can assume at least 5 of their missions were blowing the rest up. One was ‘in Poland, near the Baltic’, the other was ‘30-40 miles west of the Maginot Line’, thanks Steve. That doesn’t give us shit, son. But I will try.

1. A Hydra facility raid, #2. This is the one 30-40 miles west of the Maginot Line, labeled #2 on the map. West, in fact, of Liechtenstein, and southeast of Innsbruck, in a town that begins with RES. I think this is Resia, Italy, and the Reschen Pass (Resia Pass in WW2), which would make sense, tactically. I’d like to point out that they show Bucky entering with the team, show the team running out, show Steve riding out on his motorcycle, and then the place blows up. No Bucky. Take better care of your marksman, boys . . .

2. An approach with additional military forces through a forest, in the snow. Look at those BAMF motherfuckers. I got no clue what this mission could be, though. This has the feeling of a patrol, rather than a directed attack on anything. Bucky doesn’t even have his rifle.

3. A direct attack through a forest of exploding trees . . . no snow. This is probably a frontal attack intended to push at the enemy lines. With mortars like that coming at them as they advance, there’s no way whoever they were facing wasn’t dug in on a forward line.

4. This is most likely a harassment mission. They’re shown disturbing the lines of supplies to somewhere, and taking care to be covert, which is . . . not usually how Steve rolls, lbr.

5. Another Hydra base raid, Base #5. This is shown through only film, with Steve planning an approach to somewhere and a whole shitload of troops mobilizing with them. From where they are, he’s pointing south. God help me. Looking at the map he’s pointing to, the best guess I have based on the coastline is that it shows the northern bits of Belgium, and he’s pointing toward Hydra base #5, which is somewhere in the northeast corner of France, right below the border of Luxembourg.

6. Seek and destroy mission. This was another battle, not a base. Despite the fact that they’re in rubble, but then . . . most of Europe was rubble at this point, lbr. Peggy pulls a ‘Hydra battle lines’ flag from the map after this mission, so this was about pushing the forward line back. And we know this was the Hydra line, not the Nazi line. The scene we see was likely after the battle itself was over, when the search for the wounded and intel begins; that’s when enemy snipers made their last stand, like the one seen stalking Steve’s oblivious star-spangled ass. Bucky almost kills Steve for saluting at him and giving away his carefully chosen position.

7. A pitched battle in a town, somewhere. Steve is seen kicking ass and stuff.

8. Cool guys don’t look at explosions . . .  The only reason I am separating these three clips is because the middle one is obviously in a forest, where the other two are in towns. We’ll call them three separate skirmishes. I would imagine all three of these are about pushing back that forward line.

9. The mega huge tank in the middle of town. I can see the team being sent out just to take care of this thing. Historian sidenote; the Nazis did indeed cook up some monster tanks. Hitler had a size kink. The Tiger II, or as the American GIs called it, the King Tiger, was . . . I mean, you were fucked if one of these rolled up into your path. They were damn near indestructible and they carried a big fucking stick. The problem with a heavy tank is that a Europe that has been bombed back to Creation for several years is a muddy Europe . . . if that Hydra tank wasn’t stuck in 5 feet of mud it was made of aluminum or something.

10. A last Hydra base raid, Base #?. This is shown only through the resulting smoking husk of a destroyed base and Red Skull being a diva. I don’t know which one this was, other than knowing it had to be #1, or #6. I hate to tell Steve, but I’m not sure any of the flags on this map are in Poland near the Baltic Sea, my dude. It would have to be #6 that he was talking about, though. #1 is just northeast of Lübben, Germany, in what appears to now be Briesensee nature preserve.

The only other hints we get at their missions are the clips of footage from TWS. 

11. Hydra Facility #3. #3 is in the south of fucking Greece, near the northwestern tip of the body of water called Maliakos Kopos. There’s a marina in that area, Agia Marina, that would make a very convenient Hydra facility if I do say so myself. Now, this looks like a water landing! And it’s not an ocean landing, so that marina at facility #3 might be the ticket.

12. I’m going to call this a Hydra Facility Raid. Look at him go. There he go. Again, this is either #1, or #6. idfk anymore.

13. Prisoners. Cap is seen escorting surrendered German soldiers, It’s notable that they’re not Hydra, so that would be one of the ‘regular’ missions they ran with other troops. It could be part of any of the above missions, though.

14. Clearing out a town left by retreat. Those soldiers are not particularly the kind of alert that possible enemy combatants in the weeds will make you, so that town has probably been cleared.

15. Troop Transport/Advancement. This is notable because it’s a bridge, and not a little stone bridge, either, it’s a big one. In fact, this is the Ludendorff Bridge over the Rhine. (You can learn more about the capture of this bridge by looking up the Battle of Remagen.) Bridges were kind of a big deal at this stage when the German army was pulling out all the stops trying to prevent the Allied advance. Bridges large enough to convey heavy artillery got blown up but quick. This bridge in particular was front page news when it was captured by the Allies. Unfortunately, we can’t place Steve and his team at the Battle of Remagen, or at the Ludendorff Bridge, because this happened just days after Steve nosedived into the Arctic. So. We’ll call it an MCU bridge! This was either coming back from the front and they were deeper in Allied territory, or more likely after a battle, but on the way to the new front lines, as established by the winning of the goddamn bridge. Doubt this was a Hydra mission, either.

All in all, Bucky and Steve have 16 months of battle side-by-side. Bucky would have had 20 months total of combat service in the War.

I'm going to list some real events from the War during this time that the team might have been involved with or nearby for that could fill in some of those non-Hydra missions above, and some things they would definitely have at least talked about. You can skip these if you like, just scroll down to the next bolded bit. I am copying and pasting these because I can:

December 2, 1943: The Germans conduct a highly successful Air Raid on Bari, Italy. One of the German bombs hits an Allied cargo ship carrying mustard gas, releasing the chemical which killed 83 Allied soldiers. Over 1000 other soldiers died in the raid.

January 17, 1944: The first Battle of Monte Cassino begins when the British X Corps attacks along the Garigliano river at the western end of the German Gustav Line.

January 20, 1944: The U.S. Army 36th Infantry Division, in Italy, attempts to cross the Gari River but suffers heavy losses.

January 22, 1944: Allies begin Operation Shingle, the landing at Anzio, Italy. The Allies hope to break the stalemate in south Italy, but they are unable to break out of the beachhead and the line holds until late May.

February 15, 1944: The second Battle of Monte Cassino begins with the destruction of the historic Benedictine monastery on Monte Cassino by Allied bombing. The Allies believed the grounds were used as an observation post by the Germans

February 16, 1944: Germans launch a major counter-attack at Anzio, threatening the American beachhead.

March 15, 1944: The third Battle of Monte Cassino begins. The small town of Cassino is destroyed by Allied bombers.

April 27, 1944: The Slapton Sands tragedy: American soldiers are killed in a training exercise in preparation for D-Day at Slapton in Devon.

May 8, 1944: D-Day for Operation Overlord set for June 5.

May 11, 1944: The fourth battle of Monte Cassino begins led by general Anders of the 2nd Polish Corps.

May 18, 1944: The Battle of Monte Cassino ends in Allied victory. Polish troops of the 2nd Polish Corps led by general Władysław Anders capture Monte Cassino. German troops in west Italy have withdrawn to the Hitler Line.

June 4, 1944: Allies enter Rome, one day after the Germans declared it an open city. German troops fall back to the Trasimene Line. Meanwhile, Operation Overlord is postponed 24 hours due to high seas.

June 5, 1944: Operation Overlord commences when more than 1,000 British bombers drop 5,000 tons of bombs on German gun batteries on the Normandy coast in preparation for D-Day. And the first Allied troops land in Normandy; paratroopers are scattered from Caen southward.

June 6, 1944: D-Day begins with the landing of 155,000 Allied troops on the beaches of Normandy in France. The Allied soldiers quickly break through the Atlantic Wall and push inland in the largest amphibious military operation in history.

June 10, 1944: At Oradour-sur-Glane (a town near Limoges), France, 642 men, women, and children are killed in a German response to local Resistance activities.

June 13, 1944: Germany launches a V1 Flying Bomb attack on England, in retaliation for the invasion. The V-1 attacks will continue through June.

July 3, 1944: The Allies find themselves in the "battle of the hedgerows", as they are stymied by the agricultural hedges in Western France which intelligence had not properly evaluated.

July 24, 1944: Operation Cobra is now in full swing: the breakout at St. Lo in Normandy with American troops taking Coutances.

August 15, 1944: Operation Dragoon begins, marked by amphibious Allied landings in southern France. Elsewhere, the Allies reach the "Gothic Line", the last German strategic position in North Italy.

August 19, 1944: The French Resistance begins an uprising in Paris, partly inspired by the Allied approach to the Seine River.

August 25, 1944: Paris is liberated. The German military disobeys Hitler's orders to burn the city.

September 2, 1944: Allied troops enter Belgium.

September 6, 1944: The "blackout" is diminished to a "dim-out" as threat of invasion and further bombing seems an unlikely possibility.

September 9, 1944: The first V-2 rocket lands on London.

September 17, 1944: Operation Market Garden, the attempted liberation of Arnhem and turning of the German flank begins.

October 18, 1944: Hitler orders a call-up of all men from 16 to 60 for Home Guard duties.

November 1, 1944: "Operation Infatuate", an Allied attempt to free the approaches to Antwerp begins; amphibious landings take place on Walcheren Island. It would become a major supply port for the Allies by the end of the month.

November 20, 1944: Hitler leaves his wartime headquarters at Rastenberg, East Prussia, never to return; he goes to Berlin, where he will soon establish himself at the bunker.

December 16, 1944: The Battle of the Bulge begins as German forces attempt a breakthrough in the Ardennes region. The main object of Hitler's plan is the retaking of Antwerp.

January, 1945 - The only mission the MCU gives real details about comes from the Smithsonian Exhibit's interview with Peggy Carter (which you can watch in its entirety btw). The 'difficult winter, 1945' has to be January, and they were outside Stalingrad, Russia. During - or possibly in the aftermath of - a blizzard, Steve (and presumably the Commandos but fuck those guys amirite Agent Carter?) fight their way through a Hydra blockade that had been there 'for months', and saved half a battalion, over 1,000 men, who'd been penned down behind German lines. That's literally all we've got for mission details, and none of that makes any sense. Like any. At all. Why the fuck were they near Stalingrad?? How did they get to the Eastern Front, STEVEN???

February 1945 - Bucky falls from a goddamn train in the Alps. There is no resource to tell us how much time passes between Bucky's fall and Steve's supposed death in the Valkyrie. So let me get my history on for a second. On February 17, 1945, the British Special Air Service executed Operation Cold Comfort, a parachute drop raid near Verona, Italy with the objective of blocking the main rail lines through the Brenner Pass by landslide. The Brenner Pass is a mountain pass through the Alps which forms the border between Italy and Austria. Sounds familiar, right? (It's also featured on one of the Captain America covers, Captain America No. 33, 1943).

The operation would ultimately be a failure, but since Schmidt wouldn't have known that, hearing rumors of this operation, or even word that it had been attempted and fearing a second try, this could have been the inciting incident behind why he had Zola hauling his evil ass along that railway at a speed described as 'moving like the devil'. So we can safely put Bucky's fall between February 15 and February 25th. You could also stretch and say it was February 14th, if you are the reborn incarnation of Satan.

Now, by the end of February, the Red Army was sweeping through the northern regions of Poland toward the German border, moving north and west. It's a Russian soldier who finds Bucky in the Alps, so either that patrol was way the hell out of their lane, or . . . Bucky laid there for a while, folks. Seriously, the Red Army didn't even sniff the border of Austria until March 31, 1945 with the Upper Silesian Offensive. Which leads one to postulate that, a. the Russians who found Bucky were lost as fuuuuuck, b. the Russians who found Bucky were a rogue group who defected to Hydra after Hydra declared itself a separate entity from the Axis forces (doubt it), or c. neither Steve nor any of the rest of the team ever actually looked for Bucky's body, even after Steve went down in the Valkyrie, and he laid there for weeks. I honestly choose to believe one of the former, since the latter is just . . . I can't.

[No, you know what? Fuckin......frustrated historian meta addition.]

It's always bothered me that they might never have looked for Bucky's body, y'know?

I always assumed the arm got ripped off when he hit the side of the ravine. Like maybe he grabbed for or hit a ledge and the speed/height of his fall was just too great and it got ripped off. Because it's not crushed like it would be if he'd landed on it, it's a traumatic amputation. It almost had to have happened during the fall. Which could mean he'd have landed close to the edge, or maybe like hit higher up and tumbled until he was at the bottom instead of freefalling the whole way?

In his flashback, you can see he's still bleeding as the soldiers are carrying him. Bleeding a lot. If he'd been in the water or motionless in the snow for any amount of time, the bleeding would have at least become sluggish. He'd be hypothermic; his body would route blood away from his extremities to protect his vital organs, plus the blood vessels in the wound would be constricting due to the cold. But, if he'd been moving under his own power trying to get to help, it would explain why he's still bleeding; his movement kept the blood circulating where it would otherwise have clotted up.

In this gif, it looks almost like the blood trail starts just a few meters away. If we take a leap and assume that when they started moving him it jogged him awake, then this scene shows where the Russians found him. Those are trees, aren't they? Meaning he moved under his own power after he landed. Meaning he got the fuck up after falling off that train, and walked through that ravine toward help. What a fucking badass, jfc.

Two things I think we can say with certainty; one, the Russians were definitely searching for someone. He's on a stretcher, which wasn't something a normal patrol would've been carrying, especially over rough terrain. They had it with them for a reason. And two, the Russians weren't there because of Zola. Between Bucky falling and Gabe taking the control room, he had very little time to get off a communication with sitrep and location. And even if he was able to, it would have been to Hydra troops, who would have shown up wearing Hydra gear. And Russians are almost certainly not part of Hydra at that stage in the War.

Those Russian soldiers were probably an Allied search party that was sent out to find Bucky. That would tick off a lot of problem boxes, wouldn't it? It would mean someone - the SSR, the Army - did order a rescue/recovery for a damned war hero like a fallen Howling Commando, and Allied Russian troops were closest or something. It would explain why Russian soldiers were in such a remote area, with a stretcher, when they had zero other reason to be there! It would explain why Bucky is listed as KIA instead of MIA even though they obviously never found his body. It would also explain why Bucky didn't struggle as they were carrying him off; he thought they were on his side, rescuing him.

My theory after writing all this up? He lost the arm in an impact with the side of the ravine, but contacting the ravine walls also slowed his landing and put him on dry ground. He then got up like a BAMF and moved, either until he found shelter under some trees, or he simply collapsed from shock or trauma or exposure or all of the above. An Allied rescue/recovery party found him, but they were Russian, and they reported him KIA and kept him because they knew he must be enhanced to have survived that sort of fall, cold, and blood loss, and they wanted their own Captain Comrade.

March 4, 1945 - The SSR and other forces raid the secret Hydra bunker and Steve Rogers boards the Valkyrie on his way to getting fridged, literally haha, so Peggy Carter can become a hero . . . good job Captain Cannonball.

March 15-24, 1945 - The Commandos assist in Operation Undertone, which was part of the Allied invasion of Germany by the U.S. Seventh and French 1st Armies of the U.S. Sixth Army Group. It was a very real operation, so info is easy to find about it if your heart is still in your chest after watching both our boys plummet to their supposed deaths.

Some time in April probably?? 1945 - Dugan and Morita head to the last known HYDRA facility, Facility #4 bitches!, known simply as the Fortress, located some the fuck where in Austria, with Peggy Carter. They capture HYDRA General Werner Reinhardt and take possession of the first known classified 084, the Obelisk. We don't see the Obelisk again until Agents of SHIELD.

May 8th, 1945 - VE-Day. The remaining five members of the team gather in a pub to toast 'the Captain', suggesting that they did indeed just leave 'the Sergeant's' body rotting in the Alps somewhere, fuck that guy. (It is notable that one of the tie-in books for the movie states explicitly that they toast to both 'the Captain' and 'the Sergeant', so it's probable that they gave each man his own, individual farewell. We just didn't see it.)

(If you want more timeline! Trying to track the Winter Soldier through both canon and history.)

Walking The Wire (146/159)

Summary: Tony Stark always knew about Peter Parker. He didn’t know that Peter was going to get superpowers and become Spider-Man, but he always knew about Peter because Peter was his son.

This will span from pre-Iron Man up through the rest of the MCU (eventually including Infinity War) and will be for the most part canon compliant except where I’ve taken some liberties and interpreted canon a certain way.

Pairings: Pepper/Tony, Tony/Steve (endgame), Tony/Mary (past)

A/N: If you want me to tag you when I post new chapters let me know. This fic is also on AO3

I used Collider’s MCU timeline to stay canon and the title of this fic is an Imagine Dragons song that is just so fitting for Peter and Tony

@findmeinthestarss

Masterpost

Chapter One Hundred Forty Five

There was a heavy feeling that sort of lingered on him afterwards maybe because Tony felt weird about the whole thing or because he and Steve didn’t really speak after they got out of the building.

“Scott, mind driving?” Tony asked.

Steve glanced at him in surprise, but Tony really didn’t feel up to driving. He was sort of drained and Steve just took his hand after they both got into the back of the car and Tony leaned his head on Steve’s shoulder.

It was the radio that filled the car with noise -- old songs from 2001 and earlier that Tony barely recognized or remembered. His mind wasn’t really on the music anyway. He’d met a baby Peter. He’d held a baby Peter -- one that was just over three weeks old and was so absolutely beautiful and amazing that Tony doubted he would ever forget the way that baby looked or felt in his arms. Or how he smelled.

Once Peter was back, Tony would tell him all about it. Not just him and Steve going to meet baby Peter, but all of it. The time travel and everything they’d done to get him and everyone else back.

It was only once they were back at the warehouse that Scott finally spoke. “How did it go?”

“It was great -- I’ll never forget it. It was just hard too.”

Scott pat him on the shoulder but didn’t say anything.

They got back to their present time quickly enough after that. Tony made a note to check up on what the opening and closing of a time vortex in the same place repeatedly would do, and then he just led Steve to their room after parting ways with Scott.

“A part of me wants to go back there and just take him and raise him and love him and never let him out of my sight,” Tony said.

“I know,” Steve said. “Me too.”

“I just -- I lost so much time not being around for him. And I can’t actually change any of that -- I don’t want to. I don’t know what it might do or how it would change what Peter grows up to be but it still just--”

“It’s unfair,” Steve finished for him.

Tony nodded.

Steve led him to the bed and pushed him to sit. Tony just watched him while Steve moved around undressing and getting ready for bed.

“Tony, you were a part of his life in the way that you could be. In the best most capable way that you could have been at the time. And you can’t beat yourself up about doing the right thing and letting Mary choose what was best for him.”

He did know that -- he was well aware of how badly the Tony from 2001 would have done with a baby. Or maybe he wouldn’t have been that bad -- Peter would have certainly changed him. Or that Tony could have damaged Peter and made him into a different person entirely because he just wasn’t prepared for fatherhood back in 2001. And then there was everything else too -- Afghanistan and Iron Man and all the things that would have put Peter in danger.

“Tony, I have to ask,” Steve said, sitting down next to him. Tony turned to face him.

“Yeah?”

“Is that why you wanted to adopt? It was -- you mentioned it in the message and we haven’t really talked about it.”

“What? The whole baby thing?” Tony asked and he shook his head at once. “No. Well, maybe at first when I had no hope of meeting Peter. But now I honestly can say that I don’t really care what age we adopt. I just, I like the idea of making this family bigger. Peter with a brother or sister and the two of us -- it was kind of fanciful.”

Steve shook his head. He was holding Tony’s hands in a tight grip. “I was so thrown when I heard that and I couldn’t imagine it, you know. Back in the 40s it wasn’t even a thought. Not really. Then waking up in the future killed all of that. I didn’t think I’d ever be more than just Captain America again but you changed that.”

“Steve, I--”

“No. Wait. I just want you to know that once everything is back to normal and Peter is -- our son is back -- adoption is definitely on the table for me.”

---

“I miss K-9,” Peter said.

“K-9?” Bucky asked just as Sam nodded in agreement.

“My dog,” Peter said.

Bucky gave him a look. “And you couldn’t come up with a better name than K-9?”

“What, like Bucky? I mean, it’s kind of a good name for a dog. Maybe if I get another dog, I’ll name it after you.”

Bucky reached over to pinch his arm which actually kind of hurt. Peter rubbed at the spot and shot him a glare.

“It’s a pun because he’s a robot dog,” Sam said.

“Ah. That almost makes it better. Kind of,” Bucky said.

“And if you build another and name it Bucky, I claim dibs,” Sam said.

Peter laughed. “Red Wing not enough for you?”

“I hated that thing,” Bucky said.

Peter did miss K-9 and the way that he greeted him every time he came home and how absolutely dog like the robot dog was. Peter had played with him before leaving for school the morning of the trip, throwing a tennis ball for K-9 to chase and bring back. He’d almost been late leaving because of it.

He missed being home in general -- everything about it. Things had just seemed so simple -- his biggest worry had been the field trip to the tower. Peter had never expected to end up in space and to turn to dust and end up trapped in one of the stones.

“I always wanted a dog,” Peter said, “and my dad built one for me.”

“He’s really cool,” Sam said. “Basically a dog without all the annoying parts. He’s going to be there waiting for us to return. Maybe you’ll get to meet him, Barnes.”

They had to keep their hope alive and believe that they’d be going back. Time moved weirdly in the stone, and there was no knowing how much time had really passed so far, but no matter how long, they had to believe that his dad and the others would figure out where they were and that they would get them out.

--

Tony woke up before Steve again a few hours later and it felt like deja vu to get up and leave Steve behind again. He got dressed and then walked towards the kitchen, ready for a cup of coffee, and wasn’t surprised to find Bruce already there and he wasn’t alone. Natasha was with him.

Bruce was in the middle of cooking something that smelled wonderful while Natasha leaned against the counter next to him, holding a cup of steaming tea or coffee -- Tony couldn’t tell.

“He’s going to be fine, Natasha,” Bruce said. “He’s just grieving like everyone else. He lost his whole family.”

“You didn’t see him when I found him. It was like he was someone else entirely. And he was out there on his own chasing on cold leads on some bad guys like that was going to help anyone. I guess he just needed something to do. I don’t know.”

Tony stepped into the kitchen. “I better hope you’re making enough for me,” Tony said.

Bruce laughed. “I’m making enough for Thor.”

“Hi, Tony,” Natasha said, she moved to his side, wrapping her arms around his middle, her cup still in her hand.

“So, you found him? You brought him home?” Tony asked.

“I had to sedate him,” Natasha said.

She looked tired and sad. Tony rubbed a hand over her back. She leaned her head on his shoulder for a few seconds before she pulled back entirely, sipping at her drink again.

“He’s not taking it well,” Natasha said. “I think the past few years have been hard on him. Fury and his missions and being on house arrest. He got back home from a mission to see them disappear and he hates that he wasn’t there earlier -- that he was on a Shield mission instead of with us. With them.”

Tony was probably the only one out of them that could understand what Clint was going through. It was different when it was your kids. Different than losing friends, different than losing family members -- it was a pain that Tony would never wish on anyone. And Clint had lost more than just one child. His wife too. Having just gone back to see Peter, Tony felt even more motivated to keep working on getting everyone back.

“Did you tell him we’re working on it?” Tony asked.

“He doesn’t care. He’s -- I think he lost it a little. I don’t think he wants to let himself believe we can do it.”

“Well, he’s going to find it again,” Tony said. “Even if he’s useless to us at the moment, I’m glad you brought him back. He shouldn’t be alone.”

He went about getting himself his cup of coffee and then poured another for Steve. They needed to get on planning how to get the next stone. There were so many people that probably had lost everything just like Clint and they needed to get a move on getting the stones and bringing everyone back.

“I think we need to start getting our plan for the next stone. I’ll go get Steve.”

When he got back to his and Steve’s room, Steve had rolled onto Tony’s side of the bed entirely, but the smell of the coffee and Tony walking into the room seemed to wake him up because he blinked slowly and Tony just smiled and watched him until Steve stretched out an arm and his eyes found him.

“Hey, Sunshine. I think it’s time we get back to work.”

“How are you so awake right now?” Steve asked. “What time is it?”

“Early. But come on, Bruce has breakfast on and Nat is back.”

Steve sat up. “Nat’s back?”

Tony nodded. He extended Steve’s coffee to him once he was on his feet, but Steve’s hand landed over Tony’s and he leaned over to kiss Tony before taking take cup from him.

“Hi,” Steve said.

Tony smiled and hummed.

---

“What if we go for the Time Stone?” Steve asked.

They were in the conference room again and Tony had images and video from BARF up all relating to the Mind Stone. The thing with the Mind Stone was that it had shown up when Loki did and while they could try and go back to 2012 again, Tony felt a little better about finding it elsewhere. There was just the problem of Hydra being in possession of it for so long.

“Nope. The Mind Stone has to be first. You did not meet Strange, Steve. He will not allow us to take that stone without a fight. He’s the protector of the Time Stone and he takes that absolutely seriously.”

“Exactly,” Steve said, “so he’ll understand time travel. We can explain it to him.”

Tony shook his head and then he looked towards Bruce. “Tell him, Bruce, tell him how hard it will be to convince Strange to do anything. He won’t believe us and even if he does he won’t want to part with the stone.”

“Well neither did you and we figured that out,” Steve said.

“Yeah, when I had to knock myself out,” Tony said.

Steve rolled his eyes, but there was fondness there. “You didn’t seem particularly remorseful about it at the time.”

Tony shrugged his shoulders. That had had more to do with how Steve had been looking at that other Tony and how obvious it had been that Steve didn’t want to hurt the Tony from 2012. It was a little bit silly considering that it was him in the past -- but Tony just hadn’t liked it.

“And if he doesn’t want to part with it then we just bring him along, then,” Steve said. “Would that be so bad?”

At that Tony actually laughed and Bruce gave him a reprimanding look. Tony had to remember that Steve had never even met Strange and that Bruce had dealt with him for an hour at the most. Neither had gone to space with the guy. Not to mention that plucking someone out of time would have consequences.

“It’s not an entirely bad idea,” Bruce said.

Took shook his head at once. “But it is,” he said. “Even if we’re not making a mess of our own timeline by taking him out of it, he’s still the head wizard or whatever and that would probably have some sort of major impact in at least the branch timeline created if we took him.”

“So we return him from where we take him,” Steve said.

It was just the three of them in the conference room seeing as everyone else was still sleeping and Natasha had chosen sleep over staying up with them and planning. Tony had realized how tired she was, then, because Natasha was not one to miss anything if she didn’t have to. Her search for Clint had really taken it out of her.  

“He would drive us all crazy,” Tony said. “I already spent more than enough time with him.”

Steve sighed. “I’m just saying that we can’t make that stone be the last stone we get and that it might be worth it to have someone that knows how to use it on our side.”

Tony shook his head and when he looked at Bruce, Bruce just sort of shrugged as if he had no opinion on the matter so Steve just sighed.

“Fine. So we go for the Mind Stone, then. But afterwards we’re going to have to deal with the Time Stone.”

“We’ll deal with it when we get to it,” Tony said and then he pulled up one of the videos and Tony knew it was something from Steve’s memories from when he’d been working with BARF.

It was just after they had all left the quinjet and Clint had gotten patched up. Tony remembered how weird that time had been. He and Pepper had been breaking up. Tony had all but given up on ever getting to meet Peter. And then there had been those visions from Wanda. They had been splintering from within even then.

Tony and Bruce had taken the scepter to the workshop and it was obvious seeing things from Steve’s perspective that Steve had had no idea that they were going to do more than keep it there. And then, the scepter would remain in the workshop.

“This one is going to be more delicate,” Tony said. “There’s only a narrow window of time when we can take it undetected. Bruce and I were working on it constantly.”

They watched something from Bruce’s perspective next and it was so clear that he and Bruce had barely left the lab since they had arrived back. They had been so obsessed. No, not them. He had been obsessed. Scared and sure that they would need some sort of protection from alien threats. The only time they finally gave up on it was the night of the party and Ultron had of course formed during the party.

“What about taking it before we bring it to the tower?” Bruce asked.

“We’d be facing Hydra,” Tony said. “We would know where to go now but it’s not likely we’ll see Hulk any time soon and I don’t want to go into a fight that we could avoid entirely.”

“And before it made it to Sokovia,” Bruce said.

“We couldn’t find it anywhere, remember,” Steve said. “We were at it for months. We don’t know anything about what might need to happen or how the stone was used. Too many variables.”

He was right. Tony nodded. “Too many unknowns. If it had just gone to a vault this would be different but we have no idea how many hands it changed before we found it or what they did with it. We’ll just have to do it during the party. That’s a bit more controlled.”

Chapter One Hundred Forty Seven