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coeurdalene · 9 months

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if i could pull you closer

masterlist | ao3

summary: leon and nessa are plotting something and gordie is 100% in on it, too. (hint: it has everything to do with you, but raihan doesn’t know that yet.)

pairing: raihan x reader

warning(s): leon being a little shit.

word count: 1.36k

Raihan doesn’t like a lot of things: Fairy-types. Boring Pokémon battles. Half-melted snow mixed with dirt messily sticking to Hammerlocke’s cobblestone roads in the winter. The way Leon and Nessa keep whispering to each other before glancing over at him like they’re plotting something. Or the way Gordie makes eye contact with him from across the room and gives him an encouraging thumbs-up, grinning as if to say that he knows something Raihan doesn’t.

He’s just trying to enjoy his Friday evening lounging on a couch in Leon’s Wyndon townhouse and spending time with his friends as they celebrate the end of another gym challenge season. But the excitement in Nessa’s eyes as she shoves her phone into Leon’s grasp and the sneaky looks they keep sending his way threaten to disturb his peace. Not to mention Gordie, who still has that stupid grin on his face—the absolute tosser.

There’s a sharp knock on the front door. Nessa bolts out of the living room to answer it and Raihan mentally braces himself for whatever kind of chaos is about to happen.

Then, when you walk in looking staggeringly beautiful and breathtakingly divine, Raihan determines that he’s going to kill Leon and Nessa—and maybe Gordie, too.

(Raihan meets you for the first time at Nessa’s twenty-fifth birthday party in Hulbury while scouring the house trying to figure out where the hell Leon disappeared to. Maybe he should keep calling him until the git actually answers his phone or track down Nessa and ask if she’s seen him. Or maybe he should just walk into every room and yell out Leon’s name in hopes that he’ll show up at some point.

Somewhere between the living room and the kitchen, he accidentally bumps into you and nearly sends you toppling to the floor if not for his quick reflexes—his hands reaching out to grab your waist, yours lightly pressing against his chest as you right yourself. And before he has the chance to finish his frantic apology, you reassure him that you’re okay, flashing a dazzling smile that leaves him speechless.

And at that moment, with his hands still on your waist and yours still on his chest, Raihan decides to throw every plan he had to find Leon out the window.)

The panic mode in Raihan’s head switches on the second you plop down next to him on the couch. He stiffens. Out of the corner of his eye, he notices Nessa and Gordie watching like a pair of Noctowl from the other side of the room, and suddenly there’s a palpable feeling of nervousness in the air. You’re seemingly unbothered by it, as your gaze meets his and your lips break out into a gorgeous smile that makes him feel like he’s going to implode. But then you start talking—your soft Hulbury lilt is adorable—and Raihan begins to find himself at ease again.

He wants to tell you how he feels—how he kinda, maybe, likes you a little bit and how he kinda, maybe, would like it if you went out with him sometime—but he pushes it away for later. There are too many people around anyway. Hop and Milo are sitting on the floor and having a conversation about Wooloo, not too far from where he’s sitting with you on the couch, and he isn’t too sure he wants them overhearing him confess his feelings to you.

But he can’t push away the surging feeling in his chest that he gets from the way you glance over at him with a brilliant grin when you tell him about your upcoming endeavors and from the way your eyes light up when he shows you pictures of his Flygon eating berries.

Somehow, during your conversation, his arm finds its way around your waist and your head comes to rest on his shoulder—at some point, he had decided he didn’t care if he was being subtle or not. And, later in the night when he’s feeling a little bolder, he dips his head down to whisper in your ear, “Do you wanna get out of here?”

You respond by tugging him to his feet. Raihan rolls his eyes at the wink Leon gives him as you pull him out the front door.

(“Your breathing is a little heavy,” you say. You’re standing next to him on Nessa’s balcony and leaning against the rail, your shoulder touching his.

“Are you making fun of me? I think you’re making fun of me.”

“I’m not, I swear,” you reply. “Only pointing it out.”

“I’m just a little nervous,” he admits.

“Nervous?”

“Yeah. Because you’re really cute.”

And when the sweet sound of your laughter fills the air, he can’t stop himself from grinning.)

Wyndon glitters in the dark, but it’s nothing compared to the way you smile up at him when you step out onto the empty street. A street lamp bathes you in light and Raihan has the urge to wrap you up in his arms and kiss you right then and there—and Arceus, he wants to—but he stops. Instead, after a reminder to not get too ahead of himself, he holds out his hand.

He can barely contain his giddiness when he feels your fingers intertwine with his.

“Where to?” you inquire as he begins walking down the street with you by his side and your hand in his in between.

“Wherever you want,” he replies.

There’s a glimmer in your eye as you ask, “I know it’s late, but do you think the Ferris wheel is still open?”

“The Hurricane? I doubt it,” he says, glancing at the circle of lights in the distance. Suddenly, an idea pops into his head and he hesitates, but ultimately decides that he’s daring enough to add on, “But I can take you sometime, if you want.”

You smile, “I’d like that.”

Raihan feels like he just won the League Championship.

(“Why’ve you got that moony look on your face?” Gordie comments from across the room.

“What are you talking about?” Raihan grunts, looking up from his phone and his text messages to you, suppressing his smile so he can shoot a questioning look at the blond. Gordie shrugs in response before returning to paging through his geology book.

“He’s talking about the fact that you look like an idiot in love,” Piers chimes in from his place on the other end of the couch, “and we, by virtue of being your friends, want to know why.”

“Hold on, who said I was in love?” Raihan scoffs. “I’m not in love.”

“That’s rubbish, mate,” Piers rolls his eyes. “You’re totally in love. Anyone could tell you that.”

“It’s Nessa’s friend, isn’t it?” Leon interjects, walking into the room with a cup of tea in one hand and a half-eaten slice of toast in the other. “The one you were talking to at her birthday party, right? You guys were on the balcony together for a while. You seemed kinda close.”

“We’re just friends,” Raihan grumbles. And that’s the truth because you really are just friends, even though he texts you every day and thinks about you all the time—and wishes that you were more than just friends.

Gordie lets out a disgustingly loud chortle and Piers smirks, “Whatever you say.”

Then his phone buzzes and his heart soars when he sees that it’s a new message from you.

All right, fine. Maybe he is in love.)

Raihan doesn’t like a lot of things: Poorly organized shelves. The Skwovet raiding the berry trees in his backyard. Spending hours in the shower washing sand out of his hair.

But he wakes the next morning in his flat and finds you still asleep on the couch. Then he remembers how he had spent the night exploring Wyndon with you, how he had mustered up enough courage to ask you if you wanted to stay at his place for the night, and how elated he felt when you said yes. So maybe, just maybe, he can appreciate Leon and Nessa’s meddling—only if it means he gets to spend more time with you.

(He’s still considering whether or not to send his Duraludon after Gordie, though.)

#pkmn #pokemon #pkmn swsh #pokemon sword and shield #raihan #pokemon raihan #raihan x reader #raihan x you #raihan imagine #raihan fluff #my writing

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waitmyturtles · 7 months

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THE MORNING AFTER: ONLY FRIENDS, EPISODE 9 EDITION -- SEX, RELIEF, HYPOCRISY, AND A MEDITATION FOR THE HOES

There's a lot to dig into, so let's git it. This episode was more complicated than it actually seemed on the surface -- THANKS, TOP.

@lurkingshan and @respectthepetty came OUTTA the GATES as soon as yesterday's episode dropped, swinging their chanclas at the hypocrisies that larded this episode. Shan read almost every last one of these motherfuckers for filth in her post, naming Atom (there goes my NeoTitle dreams already) for unfairly shaming Boston; Ray, for clearly cheating on Mew; and Sand, for equivocating Ray to Boston -- all while Boston is actually still clearly communicating his preferences to not date, despite people all around him judging him for the sex he has. RTP Senpai points out that Sand is pissed off at Top for stealing Sand's ex-boyfriend -- but that Sand full well knows that while he's sleeping with Ray, Ray was technically still dating Mew. So -- is Sand stealing Mew's boyfriend from Ray? Why, oh yes he is, and Sand ain't holding himself accountable for it, Big Boba Kanaphan Eyes.

Hypocrisy. It was the name of the game of this episode. Or.... was it? It was actually way more complicated than that.

Atom in particular, just like -- where's my chappal -- but let me get back to him in a sec. As the hypocrisies were starting to click in, I saw something else going on in this episode, an opposite to the hypocrisy. I saw some clear revelations, and a learning and leaning into love through the inexperienced eyes of Mew, as compared to the painfully experienced eyes of Yo.

The episode started with Mew waking up at the hostel, unaware of Top's behaviors after Mew passed out at the Halloween party. (Top, by the way, was just -- CHEF'S KISS -- drippingly condescending, hypocritical, and sneaky this episode. Force just laid it awl out. What a performance. More on this in a bit.) Mew parties with Yo, who is like, the friend we need the MOST in this series, and asks her about whether or not he SHOULD like Ray. And Yo has to remind Mew to check himself before he wrecks himself over any sense of obligation he may have to Ray.

Yo's starting to help Mew's thoughts tickle away from obligation to a reality of his heart. At least -- one reality.

I thought of this scene when we went on the camping trip with Sand and Nick, and we had, I think, the best scene in all of Only Friends so far (cc @wen-kexing-apologist and @lurkingshan who were very, VERY right) -- in Sand and Nick clicking into their moment where they're both single, they both real cute, and why don't we see if something's there? Because that happens among friends, sometimes, and if you don't try, you won't know, right? Especially in a queer friend community that will almost always be smaller than a het community, making love that much harder to find. So you might dibble and dabble with your friends here and there.

And they smooched, and they laughed, and they were like, this doesn't work, and they laughed more, and moved on. And they were just so mad cool about it.

The way that this particular line of engagement ended with two pairs -- with Sand and Nick finding clarity, and Ray and Mew together at the social services office and communicating, to confirm that Ray and Mew just would not work together -- was a kind of relief that I haven't experienced in Only Friends yet. The slight lift I got from seeing these considerations and interactions reminded me of how I felt when the tide of trauma began to turn in Bed Friend, where the second act of that series was just trauma pummel after trauma pummel -- how much more could Uea take, I wondered. As we saw, in this episode of Only Friends, clarity roll through SandNick and RayMew, I felt relieved that there was some closure, somewhere, among some of these individuals who had tried, even ever so briefly, to pair up.

But -- this being Only Friends, heh -- it was not only relief that I felt in this episode, but we also still saw a lot of sticky toxicity and hypocritical judgements.

Atom couldn't just leave Boston ALONE. As ever, Boston has communicated to his hook-up that he's not a dating guy, not a relationship guy. And Atom doesn't take the hint.

I love that at this point in the series, at episode 9, we STILL have people judging one-night stands as "awful." What a stark reminder of the ways in which people use judgements against sex to forever condemn those who choose to engage in casual sex.

After episode 6, I wrote a little about the phenomenon of having "feelings" after sex. Many, many people have a biological urge (or even a socially expectant urge) to care/have feelings for for the person they have slept with, whether they had sex after a one-night stand, a friends-with-benefits arrangement, sex in a relationship, etc. Others, like Boston, don't.

Either of these phenomena are okay and utterly normal -- as long as you're accountable to yourself for your feelings, and not placing on anyone else any obligation to respond to those feelings that are only emanating from you, yourself.

In other words: even if Atom had "feelings" for Boston after sex -- what is Boston's responsibility to respond in kind to those feelings?

Boston had the right answer to Atom here. Boston says to Atom: no one (meaning, me, Boston) asked you to care for me. And I'm not here to hold that caring for you. I don't owe you that, Atom. That's not what's assumed when two people have sex as casually as we did.

Compare this to Nick's farewell monologue to Boston (right before Boston is about to have a hook-up, oh my god, Nick). Nick had a thing to say about his feelings ("I like you, Boston, and I am sorry for everything I did, and I am going to move on from you"), he said his piece, and he moved on.

At first, I was CRINGING at what was happening, because I thought Nick would make an embarrassingly grand and dramaaaaatic farewell, of a kind that I saw many of my drunk girlfriends make to their exes at bars when I was in my 20s, all with an intent of making their exes feel guilty for the break-ups that had previously happened.

But Nick, in that moment, actually owned his feelings, despite the timing of the conversation. And we saw Boston respond, ready to approach Nick -- and Nick had bounced and moved on with Daddy Dan, right then and there.

What a MIRROR of behavior between Atom ("Boston, you owe me") and Nick ("I thought about this, and I'm going to end it, for your happiness and for mine"). While Boston and his reputation still remain as a kind of bottom standard for people who want to feel superior when they compare themselves to him (ex: Top, Ray, Sand), Boston himself is direct about his feelings, or lack thereof, and Nick demonstrated that he himself has moved on from equivocating about a feeling of like/love that at least, he thinks, is not there anymore. (Which, from Boston's eyes -- we know now is not the case, as Boston continues to give hints of regret.)

I gotta tell y'all something. I was a party girl, like this group of friends, in my 20s. And I was heavily judged for being a ho. The terms slut, ho, whore -- were all used to describe my behavior in dripping judgement that I wasn't, instead, seeking safe and Puritanical monogamy. I was having fun with and in sex, and I was very heavily judged for it. Maybe, in part, it was because some of my friends had a harder time finding sex? Perhaps. But because sex is so EASY to judge, based on the majority popular judgements against sex -- isn't it easier to roll with the tide, than to think outside of the box and to not judge someone for having casual sex?

While Boston's ho reputation precedes him -- it is a reputation based on an unfair, almost Puritanical judgement against sex, and against people who have sex. (Once again: hello, Khai.) I give major applause to the hoes in this episode of Only Friends. All while people around them are judging sex, and judging people like Boston for having sex: Boston and Nick are not hiding anything -- they are not trying to equivocate away their actions. Their own timing isn't right. Nick knows he's about to go and hit that with a new dude. But they both have clarity about what's happening inside of them at their given moments, and they've become better about communicating what's happening inside of them over the course of the series. It's yet to be seen if the timing will work out for Boston and Nick -- but they're inching towards a clearer line of openness than we've seen in the past.

So. While awwwwlllll of this is going on: Top continues to try to infuse himself in Mew's life. Man. THIS GUY.

Top? Shut the hell up. Condescending foo. And then showing up to invite yourself to accompany Mew's moms? All while Mew doesn't know that you crossed his boundaries the last episode? And that you recorded Ray smooching Sand? Stooping to the very same tactics that got you, Top, caught? AND YOU CALLED A BOOTY CALL? While trying to win back Mew?

And...... amazingly. For Top, it worked. Or at least, it was working for a second. Mew was reconsidering.

To me -- in my opinion -- Top's behavior seems conniving, sniveling, more about winning than about love. But he also knows that he still has a hook in Mew, and was pulling rapidly on the fishing line.

And Mew... Mew began to follow that fishing line again, showing up to Top's building, and hopping into that elevator, with another person that Top had on his hook. And, good lord, now with Mond (MOND!) in the mix, we're going to have ANOTHER dramatic pile-up next week.

God, for me, while there were these notes of relief in this episode, these moments of clarity among people like Sand, Nick, and Boston, I just, like, wanted to tear MY HAIR OUT when I saw Mew and Boeing both approach Top's door at the same time. What the fuck will happen next.

And while Top will try to convince Mew to stay with him, surely, in episode 10 -- Top will also continue to judge Boston to Mew, I am sure. Top will judge Ray. Top will try to "heal" and "protect" and "take care" of Mew.

Top, leveraging judgement against sex by others to build up his own supposed moral and ethical fabric, "taking care" of Mew and leading Mew to think that Top is still a viable candidate for dating -- Cheum even interprets Top's behavior at the Halloween party as "taking care" of Mew -- will it come crumbling down as Boeing the Ex shows up for a little boing-boing?

Dudes, I have no idea, because Top keeps catching breaks! For people at The Top -- that's so often how it works in society, no?

Like I said: this was a hella complicated episode. We have three more to go. This episode captured in a snapshot a group of gloriously imperfect people making equivocating decisions as they bumble along, minute by minute. SandNick and RayMew got CLARITY. Boston got CLARITY on his feelings for Nick. Cheum is getting CLARITY on her association with the hostel. Atom got CLARITY on where Boston stood. I don't know that we have CLARITY on SandRay yet, but.... I dunno, I'll let the capitalists at GMMTV decide that, ha.

Where we don't have clarity is now with Top and Mew, with Top acting clearly duplicitously, and how Mew is going to manage this latest fall-out. I have no idea if Boeing will serve as competition to Mew, if Boeing will be the lug nut in the polycule we're all dying for -- I have no idea. I just know that Top -- who purports himself to be above all moral judgement, winning the hearts and minds of at least two moms from out of town, wtf -- will face yet another challenge in winning Mew's heart that he likely has a stronger chance of winning, due to his station in life. Top was about to come out on Top in this episode, and I wouldn't be surprised if he hangs on for another playoff win next week. We shall see.

I'm tagging the Ephemerality Squad in permanent fury over the permanence of people judging sex, let's go! @ranchthoughts @chickenstrangers @twig-tea @distant-screaming @thatgirl4815 (THATGIRL WITH THE THEORY THAT BOEING MAY NOT BE THE EX THAT TOP AND SAND SHARE, OH SHIT!) @lurkingshan @neuroticbookworm @wen-kexing-apologist @clara-maybe-ontheroad @kayatoasted

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jinxxangel13 · 6 days

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Phantom of the Night

Chapter 6:

Tw: blood, gore, minor character death, guns

~Masterlist~ ~Prev~ ~Next~

“Echo 0-1, moving interior.” Phantom called out, flipping her NOD’s up and sweeping her gaze around the first room.

She heard him before she saw him, registering the repetitive phrase just before she reacted.

“Mut!” Die.

Phantom pulled the trigger without hesitation.

“Grenade!”

She threw herself into the room on her left to avoid a direct blast and any shrapnel aimed her way. Once the explosion settled, she stepped back out into the original room, meeting Soap’s eyes with a nod.

“Fuckin’ hell. Good one.” Soap shook his head as he looked at what remained of the body.

“Check the bodies. Need positive ID on Hassan.”

As a team, Soap and Phantom moved together to clear the first floor, unintentionally making it a competition to see how many AQ soldiers they could down.

“Kill confirmed. Negative on target.” Phantom turned back towards where Soap was, seeing him dropping another soldier.

She rolled her eyes at his suggestive eyebrow wiggle, following him to the stairs where Ghost and another Bravo soldier waited for them.

“Pushing to second deck.”

Phantom could hear some sort of broadcast of Hassan playing in the first room on the right at the top of the stairs. Ghost reached the door first and opened it, only for an AQ soldier to walk out just as he would have gone in. Ghost pinned the soldier against the wall next to the door and shot him once in the stomach and once in the head.

Hot.

Soap and Ghost entered the room ahead of Phantom and encountered another AQ soldier.

“Got two x-rays. Neither Hassan.” Ghost spoke to Soap and Phantom, who stood at the door right behind them.

“Dump ‘em.”

Phantom raised her gun and fired at a final soldier slumped in the corner, most likely for a surprise attack.

“Good eye.”

“Thanks.” Phantom muttered, turning back around to lead them down the other hallway.

She avoided directly in front of her, swiftly stepping to her right through a crumpled wall and shooting an AQ hidden behind a pillar.

“Dropped another.”

Phantom stepped over the body and leaned out of the archway, just narrowly avoiding a bullet in the side coming from the room at the end.

“Tha’ fuck?”

She ducked across the hall as fast as possible, peaking around the doorway to figure out where the other enemy was coming from. Looking down, she noticed there was a grate at the bottom of a wall, a muzzle barely glinting in the light flooding from outside.

Phantom raised her gun, took a slow breath as she aimed carefully around the corner to avoid making noise, then fired twice.

Soap rushed down the hallway when the way was clear to her.

“Sneaky little gits are everywhere.” he spat, double checking the room.

Phantom swiveled around to the final hallway, trying to hear if someone was there before risking her neck again. She hadn’t heard anything so she peeked around the corner, taking a second before stepping in quickly. A shot rang out without her thinking about it, not even realizing she had been the one to pull the trigger on the last AQ soldier who was hiding behind the busted door in the back.

“Room clear.”

Ghost followed behind her into the room.

“Shit-He was here. This was a bloody op-center... Poke around. Likely Hassan's. Good intel from Laswell."

Soap tailed Ghost into the room, both looking around as she went through the broken door to do the same. When Phantom came back into the room, she watched Soap shuffle some papers on top of the desk written in a mix of what looked to be Arabic and a few others she couldn’t tell from the distance.

“Look- Hassan's uniform. So, he was here.” Soap turned the desk chair to show a black jacket with the familiar patches they were looking for.

“Lost him when we secured the crash site.”

Phantom turned back to Ghost as he spoke.

“Are you sayin' we shouldn't have helped?” Soap looked surprised, exchanging a glance with a partially angered Phantom before turning back to Ghost.

“Choices have consequences.”

“Glad to know I was a choice.” Phantom growled out as she shouldered her way past Ghost, ignoring the odd look he gave her and continued back downstairs.

Their radios went off simultaneously.

“All Bravo- we got movement out here.”

“On the way... All Bravo, circle up outside.” Ghost was behind Phantom, following her back outside and heading left behind the building to a warehouse.

“If Hassan's gone, then what the hell are they still protecting?” Soap called from behind her.

“Bloody good question. Let's find out.”

Phantom didn’t bother flipping her NOD’s back down, having an inkling she wouldn’t need them once they breached the rolling doors.

The three of them met with the rest of Bravo Team outside the house and headed down toward the warehouse together

“What do we got?”

A Bravo soldier answered Ghost back on his right, barely audible from where Phantom stood on their left.

“A warehouse. Roll up door's open. Heard somethin' inside…”

“Copy. Let's clear it.”

The group of them crawled under the door and entered the darkened warehouse. Suddenly, the warehouse lights turn on and AQ soldiers burst out of hiding all along the back. Bullets started flying and the sounds of screams and glass breaking rang out in the room.

“Contact!”

Phantom took cover behind some crates with Soap, losing eyesight of Ghost and the rest of their team as she focused on the AQ soldiers. She switched guns as fast as she could, double checking that she had enough bullets before going prone and aiming between the slits on the side of the shelves.

#141 x reader #cod mw2 #cod x reader #poly 141 x reader #poly tf141 #captain john price x reader #ghost x reader #john soap mactavish x reader #kyle gaz garrick x reader #alejandro vargas x reader #rodolfo rudy parra x reader #eventual romance

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jillikka · 1 year

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I needed some excuse to draw Ominis in a vest....and Sebastian...yeah....ANYWAY!

(Ominis, you sneaky git. Getting a look with your wand are you?)

#hogwarts legacy #ominis x sebastian #sebastian sallow #ominis gaunt #Blindfreckles #GET ME SOME WATER IM DIEING HERE!

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scallywaaagh · 3 months

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Finished painting up some terrain from the Octarius set and it felt like a prime occasion to have a photo op with my killteam, affectionately called "Sgt. Klawkrumpa's Sneaky Gits". Given that the Ork Kommandos box was my first foray into painting 40k minis, there are MANY mistakes and oversights on them that I recognize now... Part of me has considered trying to repaint them, but honestly I like being able to look at them next to my more recent minis and see how i've progressed. Plus, they're Orks so its alright for them to look a bit scuffed as long as they can still WAAAGH just fine!

(Please forgive the less-than-professional photos, i'm literally using construction paper and a cellphone camera. Any tips for better pictures in the future would be welcome lol)

#warhammer #warhammer 40000 #warhammer 40k #warhammer orks #orks #orks40k #40k #wh 40k #kill team

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salternateunreality2 · 3 months

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Claudia has a pet dragon AU

cute ideas that @strayheartless and I chatted about <3

Claudia probably had a pet dragon at some point that still visits and bothers her for snacks

Dragon: *tail wagging, dancing around, breathing fire* Claudia: *shoves its nose away* go on, git, I ain't got nothin more for ya, you ate all my wolf liver!

Dragon: *rolls on its back asking for belly rubs*

Claudia: ugh, fine. *Delivers belly rubs* Go on, ya daft dragon, I'm taking Cloud to school!

The villagers: ...

-----------

Claudia and her dragon had their babies around the same time, and babysat for each other.

Claudia and Dragon Mama exchange snacks occasionally; Claudia brings special parts of her kills that she and Cloud shouldn't eat, and Dragon Mama sometimes drops off whole carcasses.

Dragon: this deer ain't worth my time, but I killed it and Claudia might give me wolf liver if I drop by!

-----------

Mama Dragon is named Asil, and Baby Dragon is named Knarf. Because backwards, that's Lisa Frank, and they look like Lisa Frank characters. And they're scratch-n-sniff.

-----------

AGSZC visit Nibelheim and AGSZ are panicked when Cloud hears a dragon in the distance and runs off to confront it...only to discover Cloud GIGGLING and play-fighting it. They are more concerned about the giggling, as they've never heard it before.

They expected the Steve Irwin vibes from Zack, who has a pet sahagin in Gongaga, but Cloud was a surprise (he shouldn't have been, he's feral AF).

AGSZC: *walking to Nibelheim*

Dragon: ROAR

Angeal: We'd better steer clear, right Cloud? Cloud?! CLOUD!!!

Zack: Where did he even go?! That was so fast!

Sephiroth: Towards the dragon.

Genesis: Of fucking course.

AGSZ: *runs up just in time to see cloud, unarmed, jump on a dragon*

Cloud: KNARF YOU FUCKER I GOT YOU FIRST WAIT NO NOT THE FACE NOT THE FACE HAHAHAHAHAHAHA GET OFF

The dragons immediately like Zack because all animals immediately like Zack.

Angeal wins them over through snacks.

And they're obsessed with Genesis' sword and materia, and Sephiroth's hair.

They keep Sitting On Sephiroth and grooming his hair or staring at it, and they keep trying to steal Gen's stuff. You wouldn't think a puppy-lizard-cat is very sneaky when it's the size of a house, but clearly you would be wrong

Sephiroth: Please, Miss, I don't know how dragon saliva affects hair, and I can't afford for it to go spiky like Cloud's.

Asil: *still sitting on him and licking*

(turns out it's really really good for hair and makes it thick, shiny, and healthy...after you wash out the top layer of slime)

Knarf and Asil leave Genesis gifts when they steal from him. Sometimes it's worthless crap like a leaf or a rodent carcass; sometimes it's sparkling gems, rare materia, or their own scales, which are hard to come by. There is no pattern.

Genesis tries to bargain with them, bringing an assortment of Wall Market jewelry.

Genesis: Shall we trade? What will you give me for this diamond necklace?

Knarf: *holds up a leaf*

Genesis: How about this fake ruby bracelet?

Knarf: *5 rare materia*

Genesis: Ok, then you must give me something great for this fake ruby necklace, which only differs from the bracelet in that it is longer...

Knarf: *dead skunk plops on Genesis' head*

Talking about their childhoods:

Sephiroth: My sperm donor would order me to kill kittens.

Genesis: My parents didn't care, but my nanny would hit me with a ruler.

Zack: I'd be sent out into the backwoods to work off my energy and made friends with monsters!

Cloud: I'd go to air jail, where Asil would pick me up by my shirt and dangle me in the air.

Angeal: MY MOTHER SENT ME TO TIME OUT WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOUR CHILDHOODS

Air jail:

I'd like to think that Sephy starts to have his breakdown, Claudia hears about it and the mysterious head in the reactor, and then sends the boys to help Seph while she and Asil take care of Jenova.

Asil both sits on Jenova and incinerates her, while Claudia shoots Jenova with her biggest shotgun.

#ff7 #sephiroth #zack fair #cloud strife #genesis rhapsodos #angeal hewley #claudia strife

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ask-humphrey-bone · 28 days

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Hi Sir Humphrey! In honor of April Fools’ Day, if you and your body were all together, who would you prank and what would you do? Do you think it’s easier to pull a prank on someone with just your head? You were Certainly good at it!

Hello hello! Since this ask is really rather relevant, I’m gonna let it jump the queue so it’s posted on time! And, well, after the all important 12PM deadline. That’s how it works with you living folk, yes?! Also can’t let Julian catch wind of this, he may surprise us all and do the right thing and warn the ghost(s) in question beforehand… wouldn’t count on it, personally.

As it turned out, I was in one piece! Have been all Easter weekend; might be my new record!! Hurrah! Now it wouldn’t be fair of me to choose just one ghost to prank back… but Thomas. Hands down, git deserves it and is a hoot to mess with. He’s just so easy to wind up, it’s grand. Granted I don’t have access to rose petals or, uh, Alison’s breasts, but the bugger deserved hell in return for his treatment of me. So hell was what I gave him today! He still sees Alison everywhere, so an unsuspecting female builder also played a major part in the prank. Credit where it’s most due. Can’t wait till the real Alison calls next time; she needs to be kept up to date on the chaos! 🙈

Now for the latter part of your question. Why thank you, guess I did rather ace the pranks as just a head! It’s definitely easier that way - as I can be both easily forgotten and lost track off as just a plotting sneaky head - but also, my body’s been able to carry on the shenanigans on my head’s behalf. Can’t really blame him when he’s got no mind for what he’s doing, eh? ‘Diminished responsibility’, I believe the cop shows would call it. Certainly comes in handy at times for the both of us, it must be said!

And you, mate? Have you played any fabulous pranks this year?? I’d love to hear about them! ❤️🗡️

Humphrey x

#mr cheese has spoken #fools #bbc ghosts #sir humphrey bone #humphrey bone #thomas thorne

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thenasoneshots · 6 months

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Sirius Oneshot - It's the Inside that Counts

Requested?: No

Prompt: None

Type of oneshot: Fluff?

Timing: Marauders’ Era (7th Year)

Reader's Relations: Newt’s granddaughter (don’t ask how this works, I just wanted it to be a thing in this oneshot, because he’s best boy and it kind of works)

Reader’s House: Gryffindor

Warnings: Bullying

Other notes: The reader is slightly chubby in this. Also in this, your parents died when you were young, so you live with Newt and Tina.

----------------------------------------

“Really? You honestly thought I’d want to date you when you look like that?” I tried to hold back the tears as my, now, ex-boyfriend kicked me to the curb metaphorically, continuing to say hurtful words, another girl hanging onto his arm, “You’re dumber than I thought. I was just using you because of your family.” And with that, he walked off, the girl following next to him, laughing. I sighed and stood up trying not to let the tears fall as I made my way back up to the common room. When I got up to my dorm, I sat down on my bed and sighed, taking my robe off so I was more comfortable, and laid down on my stomach, finally letting the tears fall.

That was when I started to hear small squeaks and I felt a small weight on my head. I let out a small giggle and lifted my hand, allowing the bowtruckle to step on before I brought my hand to my face, “Hello there. Did you stow away in my robes?” The small green creature looked down refusing to make eye contact and I giggled, “At least you’ve been found, Pickett.” I sighed, placed him down on my pillow and wiped my eyes, trying to stop the tears from flowing as I reached into my bag and pulled out a piece of parchment and a quill. I immediately started writing to my grandfather to let him know that Pickett was safe and hadn’t been stolen/harmed. Once I was done, I folded it up and let Pickett up on my shoulder before leaving the dorm, and heading up to the owlery.

“(Y/n)? Where are you going?”

“Owlery,” I replied in a monotone voice, refusing to look at Jen as I knew how observant she was and that she’d be able to tell I’d been crying from my face if she hadn’t by my tone of voice, “You’ve been crying. You can tell me what’s up, you know that, right?” I nodded, “Thank you, but it doesn’t matter. Now can I continue up to the owlery please?” She narrowed her eyes and let me go causing me to sigh in relief. I really didn’t want her to find out that William had broken up with me as I knew she’d tell the Marauders because of how protective they were of me. They didn’t need to be, it wasn’t like I was related to any of them, they just decided they were going to protect me for some reason. Once I’d sent the letter off to my grandparents, I walked outside and sat down by a tree by the Black Lake as it was just after dinner and curfew wasn’t for a few more hours and the outside air helped me to think better.

—------------------SIRIUS’ POV

“It was hilarious! You should have been there Prongs, his face was priceless.”

“Mate, shh. Is that.. Look it is! Where’s (Y/n) though?”

I looked up from my food to see William walking into the Great Hall, a random Slytherin hanging onto his arm looking as sneaky as ever.

“I swear to Godric if that git broke up with her, I’ll have is head.”

“Pads, calm down we know you like her.”

“Oh shut it, Prongs, you’d be the same if someone had done the same to your precious Lily” I retorted. Before James could reply, I felt a presence next to me and I looked up to see Bella.

“Have you seen (Y/n)?” I asked, curious as to where she was as she and Bella were normally inseparable, but Bella just shook her head, “Sorry, Sirius. I haven’t seen her since Transfiguration ended, but if I see her this evening, I’ll let her know you’re looking for her.”

“Thank you.”

“Wait a minute, I have an idea.”

“Huh? What do you mean, Moony?”

“Just, give me a minute.”

Without another word, he spun around in his seat to face the Hufflepuff table, directly where Jen was sitting, “Jen, have you seen (Y/n)?”

“Hm? Oh yeah, I saw her going up to the owlery before dinner. She looked like she’d been crying but refused to tell me why. If she’s not in her dorm or the common room, then I don’t know. Wait a minute, why didn’t you guys just use that map of yours? Don’t worry I won’t tell anyone about it.”

Moony thanked her and turned around as we all banged our heads on the table, “Why didn’t we think of the map? When we get back up we’re checking that map and finding where she is.”

------------------------YOUR POV

“Alright Pickett, you can sit on my head,” I muttered as the bowtruckle refused to go back in my pocket, “But you’ve got to hide when I go back inside, “Okay?”

Pickett just stuck his tongue out at me and blew a raspberry, “I thought you were taught not to do that. If you’re discovered, then it’ll mean bad news for me. Please, work with me-”

“(Y/n)?”

At the sound of my name, I quickly took Pickett off my head, hiding him behind my back and turned to the person, “Oh, Sirius, hey, what are you doing out here?”

“I wanted to talk, have you been crying?” he asked, reaching out and taking my hand in his, which I didn’t reject, surprising him as every other time he’d tried to make physical contact with me, I’d pushed him away. I sighed and nodded, releasing my grip on Pickett before placing him back on my head and wiping my eyes with my now free hand, “Y-yeah. Promise not to tell anyone else?” Sirius nodded and I took a deep breath, “William broke up with me. Told me he was just using me because of my family and that ‘no one would want to date someone who looked like me’. He then called me fat, along with a load of other hurtful stuff and then walked off,” I spoke, the tears coming back to my eyes again, this time I just let them fall, only stopping when I felt Sirius wiping them, “(Y/n), please don’t cry. I don’t like seeing you cry, it makes me cry when you’re upset and don’t believe anything that jerk says, you’re perfect the way you are.”

“He’s right though, Sirius. No one would want to date me, I am fat-” I was cut off when he placed a finger to my lips, “Do not say that about yourself in my presence. You are not fat, (Y/n). You are perfect, and I know one person who would want to date you.”

“W-who?” I asked, looking up at him. Instead of replying, he took my cheek in his hand and bent down to my level, kissing me, “Me.” I felt my face turn bright red and I blinked, bringing my hand up to my lips once he’d stepped back a little, “Y-you? You’d want to date me?”

“I-if you wanted to date me back, then yeah. I’ve been in love with you since 3rd year, (Y/n). You know how Prongs used to go on and on about Lily before she finally gave in and started dating him?” I nodded and Sirius continued, “Well, Moony told me I was the exact same with you. Apparently, I wouldn’t shut up about you and complain about that git of a boyfriend you had whenever I could. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a nose to go and break.”

I giggled and grabbed his hand before he got too far from me, “I-if you’re serious that you’d want to date me, honestly, I’d be lucky to be the one to have grabbed your attention. I like you too, Sirius.”

That stopped him in his tracks, and he turned back towards me, grabbing my upper arms and kissing me again, “I would be the lucky one, (Y/n). I love you so much.”

“I-I love you too, Sirius. Are you sure I’m not too chubby for you to date?”

He shook his head, “No. You are perfect the way you are, how many times do I have to say it? It’s what’s on the inside that counts, not what you look like. I love you for the way you act and your personality, not what you look like.” At that moment Pickett jumped off my head and onto Sirius’ hand, causing me to smile, “It looks like Pickett approves, please don’t tell any of our professors he’s here. Honestly, he stowed away on my robes, or well, in my clothes in general.”

“I won’t don’t worry, (Y/n). I’d never do anything to get you into trouble.”

“Thank you. I love you, Sirius.”

-----------------------------END OF ONESHOT

Hehe, more Sirius fluff.

#sirius x reader #x reader #female reader #Marauders x reader #Jily mentioned #sirius black #chubby reader

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