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#sirius black comforting you
dreamingofmarauders · 2 months
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They're Wrong
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Sirius Black x Reader
Summary: In which you are told things that make you believe those hurtful words but Sirius proves you wrong
Warnings: Hurtful/demeaning words/sentences, crying, insecurities, self-doubt, sort of fluff?
A/N: I had been meaning to write this idea for a while so here's this little piece. I hope you all like it. <3
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You’re useless.
You have always been a failure and will remain a failure.
Why can’t you do anything right? You’re so stupid!
HONK!
You slammed the brakes, realizing you had still kept going when the traffic lights were signalling red. The driver of the car that you had almost crashed into, rolled his window down, his expression furious.
“Are you blind?! You were about to cause an accident! Can’t you see that the lights signal stop for you?!” The man with a burly mustache practically screeched at you, his face all red from the yelling.
You swallowed, feeling your body tremble from shock at what could have happened, before you opened your mouth. Tears pricked your eyes. “I’m so sorry.” You answered, voice shaking, “It’s my fault, I should have been paying attention.”
The man merely snorted and waved a hand, telling you to scramble, which you did. The rest of the drive home, you let your eyes stay transfixed on the road, afraid of repeating the same mistake again. When you pulled up to your house, you numbly made your way in. You dropped your purse on the dining table, heading to the sitting room to turn on the television as a distraction before you headed to the kitchen to prepare some food.
You should have seen this coming. You had always been doubted, and now you regretted having headed out there in the first place today.
You had eggs placed on a pan, sizzling and crackling over the heat. Your boyfriend would be home soon and you knew he would be hungry. However, your mind drifted from the task at hand to what had transpired an hour ago. You stared off into the distance, the demons in your head wreaking havoc.
You didn’t realize when the front door opened, or when footsteps became louder and louder. Hell, you didn’t even realize when your boyfriend was standing right in front of you, his eyes glancing down at the pan and widening. You only came shooting back to reality, when he gently nudged you out of the way.
You blinked a few times, settling back to the present, as you took in the fact that Sirius was back home and by your side. You sniffed the air, feeling an odd odour fill your senses and your eyes widened as you realized what the source of it was. Your eyes darted to the pan on the stove, beginning to reach out for it but Sirius was already on it, taking the pan over to the trash bin, throwing out the now burnt eggs. He tossed the pan in the sink before turning to look at you, taking in your appearance.
If Sirius felt something was off with you before he was certain now. Your face was looking rather pale, your eyes red and puffy, and there was a slight tremble in your whole body. Sirius’ heart clenched at the sight.
He moved towards you, gently placing his hands on your shoulders as he guided you to the couch. He made you sit down before kneeling before you, his hand gently holding yours. Sirius reached out and placed a comforting hand on your face, reassuringly stroking your cheek.
“What’s wrong, love?” He asked softly, his grey orbs peering at you with such genuine love and concern, that before you knew it, the dam broke and your eyes welled up, a sob leaving your lips. You fell onto your knees as you threw yourself at him, burying your face in Sirius’ neck as he placed you on his lap and rubbed your back whilst one hand rested at the back of your head.
You cried and cried and cried. You cried, letting all the pent up emotions out. You cried until there were no more tears left, only an exhaustive and numb feeling in your entire body remained. Throughout it all, Sirius had murmured words of comfort and love, hiding how his heart had shattered from the first second of your breakdown.
You slowly pulled back, rubbing at your face while you stared down at your lap. Sirius placed a finger under your chin, tipping your head slowly up so he could gaze into your y/e/c eyes.
“Love?”
Your lip wobbled as you drew in a breath, “I thought since it’s my day off that I should go to my parents’ house. I know there is a place in their heart that cares but sometimes they can say such things that hurt so bad, and it happened today and I spoke back which resulted in a huge argument.” You told Sirius, who rubbed comforting circles into your back.
Since you were a child there was a lot of pressure on you, however once you found out you were a witch, perhaps then your muggle parents began to distance themselves from you. You wanted their love, their attention, to make them proud, which you were able to from time to time, but most of the time, you were always criticized.
“They told me things like that I am a failure and that I’m stupid and-“ You hiccuped, “They’re right. I’m dumb. I couldn’t even keep an eye on those eggs for two minutes!” You exclaimed. “What do you even see in me, Sirius? I'm not worthy to be with you-“
Sirius placed a finger on your lips as he said, “Don’t you dare say another word.” He sternly directed at you before softening, caressing your cheek. “Love, you’re so amazing, beautiful, smart, talented, and just out of this world. I can’t imagine my life without you. How can you even think so lowly of yourself, my darling?” Sirius said, the pain he felt upon hearing how you thought of yourself reflected at the end.
You shook your head in denial, “But, they’re right-“
“No.” He cut you off, “My love, they are so wrong for saying all those hurtful words to you. You’re an angel, darling. You’re amazing. Your parents are wrong. They’re wrong.” Sirius told you with such genuine love and determination that you let out a watery chuckle, running a hand through your hair.
“I love you, Sirius. Thank you.”
At that, a smile appeared on his lips and he replied, “I love you too, Y/n.”
And you wrapped your arms around him, pulling Sirius in for a short and sweet kiss, pouring all your love and gratitude for him into the small act, making Sirius' heart melt.
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A/N: By the way, that driver the reader encountered was Vernon Dursley (I don't know why but the mustache part just reminded me of him so yeah, lol)
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ellecdc · 2 months
Note
PART 2 PLSSSSSSSSSSS
I need the comfort
ok ok ok ok ok mother's here - I've fixed it for you. Don't say I never did anything for ya 😉
part two of Mistake: poly!wolfstar x fem!reader
CW: angst, hurt and COMFORT read part one here
Remus felt like he’d just been slapped. In fact, he was sure that if he looked in a mirror, he would see a red welt in the shape of your hand across his cheek. 
Lupin?
You haven’t called him that since...well since you started dating. As a matter of fact, he can’t remember the last time you referred to him in any way other than some sickly-sweet pet name that he pretended embarrassed him, but he secretly preened at. 
I’ll see you around.
What the hell did that mean? What just happened?
He felt stuck...perhaps he should go after you? But you told him to go check on Sirius: make sure he’s okay for me, yeah? And he meant what he had said – the three of you would be back to normal in no time. They’d catch up with you tomorrow.
Remus tried to replay every interaction you had tonight. You had asked how their days were...he replied and asked how yours was. Should he have asked you first?
He should have asked you first.
You tried making conversation, but Remus was so hyper focused on Sirius’ mood – afraid that he’d do or say something out of pocket that would hurt your feelings – that each attempt sort of fell flat. Remus had been there before – he’s witnessed Sirius’ tendency to self-sabotage and ruin a good thing once he finally has it, and he didn’t want that to happen again. Not with you.
He knew what Sirius really needed was some quiet; a chance to ponder and lament angrily inside his own head without outside influence.
Maybe they should have cancelled – rescheduled your study date for another time. Clearly his effort to protect you from any negativity was in vain.  
But it was just a bad day, a blip, a one-off. You would all get some good sleep tonight and reconvene tomorrow.
Right?
Maybe he should have followed you.
But by the time he could manage to pry his feet from the floor of the library that he felt cemented to, you were gone. 
He would just have to talk it out with you tomorrow.
Remus entered his dorm to find Peter already asleep on his bed, James finishing the Transfiguration essay that was due tomorrow morning on his own bed, and both Remus and Sirius’ beds empty. 
“Pads around?” Remus asked James quietly as he began to shuck off his uniform. The quiet tone was mostly for courtesy’s sake knowing Peter could sleep through a stampede of hippogriffs.
James peered at Remus from above his glasses before nodding his head towards the bathroom door.
Sure enough, Remus found Sirius leaning against the shower stall with his eyes closed as the water cascaded around his form. 
“You almost done, love?” Remus asked gently. Sirius spooked slightly as he turned to look at Remus; his eyes were red and glossy...he had been crying.
“You didn’t stay with her?”
Remus fought the urge to grimace, to heave, to turn around and run. He opted to gently shake his head. “No, she... said she got most of what she needed to do done.”
Sirius seemed to consider that as he sighed. “Was she terribly upset? I didn’t...I didn’t mean to be an ass. I know James always says I’m quick to take it out on others – I tried really hard not to, honest. I swear it, Rem I-”
Remus began shaking his head as he moved towards Sirius. He could tell by the smell in the bathroom that Sirius had already washed his hair and there were no more suds on his body, so he turned the water off and handed Sirius a towel. 
“You were fine, Sirius. She’s – she’s fine.” He lied.
He lied. He lied to Sirius. About you.
But how could he look Sirius in the eye right now – Sirius who was currently standing naked, soaking wet, nearly hyperventilating, not over his disgusting parents but because he was afraid that he may have upset you – and tell him that between the maybe seven minutes since Sirius had left the library and now, Remus had completely mucked it all up?
The answer was: he couldn’t. He couldn’t look Sirius in the eye and admit that he may have just sabotaged your relationship.
It’s going to be fine. He tried to tell himself. We’ll fix this all tomorrow.
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You felt beyond childish, hiding in your dorm room like some toddler throwing a temper tantrum. But you had decided last night that what you really needed was space. Some breathing room. A chance to see this from a different lens. A different perspective.
And you couldn’t do that when your heart was breaking. And being around Remus and Sirius felt like that right now.
It felt heart breaking. 
And perhaps that was your answer right there. If this was causing you heart ache, why were you doing it to yourself? To them? You didn’t deserve that, and neither did they.
But it wasn’t just this you were worried about. It was more than just this relationship – it was the friendship that preceded it. It was the meshing of you into their circle of friends. You were their friend long before you were ever their girlfriend. You wouldn’t just be losing Remus and Sirius: your boyfriend’s; you’d also be losing Remus and Sirius: your friend’s.
Maybe you should have thought about that before you said yes.
Suddenly, you were a little angry: they had asked you to be their girlfriend – not the other way around! Why would they put you through all of this for, what? For...
Was it really for nothing?
“Are you coming to breakfast?” Shelby asked you quietly from the door. You shifted your head on the pillow to make eye contact with her. “No, I’ve got some things to work on. I think I’ll hang out up here today.”
She seemed to consider you, eyes squinting and mouth pursing before she offered a curt nod. “I’ll bring something back for you then.”
You smiled gratefully at her. At least you knew if you did lose Remus and Sirius, you would still have friends who cared about you. 
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Sirius spent most of his life believing he’d never be worthy of nice things. He was raised by monsters which meant he was a product of monsters; he was basically a monster.
He knew that the Black Darkness was always simmering just below the surface. It was archetypal of Black’s to explode; to lace their words with venom and strike at their victim, always aiming for the jugular. It had been Sirius’ own M.O. for his whole life. He had nearly lost everyone who ever meant anything to him on account of it. He had almost lost Moony.
Which is why it was so important to him that you never end up the latest victim of his Black Darkness. He was so afraid of disappointing you, letting you down, making you feel unloved. He didn’t think he’d ever be able to live with himself if he slipped – if he said something or did something to make you hate him. 
And it wasn’t just you he was worried about hurting; he knew if he hurt you, Remus would likely never forgive him.
Remus may have forgiven Sirius for his Darkness once; he didn’t want to risk trying for a second time. Sirius felt he’d hit his threshold for forgiveness – one more sin and he’d be on his own, surely.
So, he walked away. He tried to do it nicely – to excuse himself politely, assure you he’d be back in no time. 
But he still left.
It was cowardly. 
He needed to talk to you.
Which is why Sirius could be found that morning sitting at the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall, knee bouncing frantically under the table and his body turned towards the entrance – waiting for you to make an appearance.
Except, you never came.
“Wait, Shelby just walked in without her. Where is she?” He asked despondently, turning towards Remus. 
Remus watched as Shelby and a few of your other friends sat at their usual places without you. “Come on.” He said quickly as the two of them stood and made their way over.
“Hey Shelby. Do you know where Y/N is?” Remus asked quietly, hoping his guilt didn’t permeate his tone. Unfortunately, under Shelby’s scrutinizing glance, he was sure he had been found out. 
“She’s in the dorm.” She said flatly, looking between the two boys. 
Sirius exchanged a glance with Remus before continuing. “Erm, do you...do you know why?” 
Shelby furrowed her brows “all she said was she had ‘some things to work on’ and that she’d be in the room today.”
Remus hissed under his breath and pulled Sirius aside.
“Pads, I’m sorry, but I think-”
“What is going on?” Sirius interrupted.
“Last night, I... I think Y/N was upset?”
“Upset? With me?” Sirius asked, shame worming its way through every cell in his body. 
“I don’t know. I... I don’t think so. But she...she said she’d ‘see me around’ and then called me Lupin.” 
All blood drained from Sirius’ face as he considered Remus’ words.
See him around...see him around!? What the hell did that mean? Did you not plan on seeing them again? Oh gods...you never planned on seeing them again.
“Rem...” Sirius breathed out, leaning against a pillar for support.
“I know, I don’t-”
“Good grief, what’s gotten into you two?” James commented as he walked into the Great Hall with Lily, who opted to carry on in her search for Regulus as James took in the state of his two friends.
“Well? What’s got you in such a twist?” He pressed when neither boy offered an explanation.
“It’s Y/N.” Remus admitted.
“She’s leaving us.” Sirius blurted.
“Okay, we don’t know that.” Remus conceded.
Sirius scoffed. “Well, she basically told you to go fuck yourself last night and now she’s avoiding us; what do you call that?”
“She didn’t tell me to go fuck myself!”
James groaned and rolled his eyes before grabbing Remus and Sirius’ shirts and dragging them over to the Slytherin table.
“That’s it. You guys need to talk to Regulus.” James muttered.
“Regulus?!” Sirius sputtered, looking at James incredulously. “I’m not asking my baby brother for relationship advice.”
“You’re not asking for relationship advice. You’re asking for his perspective on his own relationship.”
“Ew! That’s worse! I don’t want to hear about my baby brother’s relationship with my adoptive brother.” 
“Oh for- you are going to listen to Regulus’ perspective on what it’s like being added to a polyamorous relationship last.” James pressed, tone implying no nonsense. 
Sirius (unwillingly) and Remus (placidly) were dragged to the dark side (read: the Slytherin table) to be read their Miranda Rights have their asses handed to them by one Regulus Arcturus Black. 
“Reg, dear. I’m begging, pleading, on my hands and knees: put the poor sods out of their misery.” James said as he bodily sat Remus and Sirius on the bench across from Regulus.
Lily snickered and poked her nose into Regulus’ cheek, causing the youngest Black to blush, though the rest of his face remained stoic as he sized Sirius and Remus up.
“What have the two of you done now?” He drawled. “I can’t help but notice one third – arguably the better third - of your little trio is missing.”
Sirius scoffed, though he didn’t argue – Regulus wasn’t wrong per se; he loved Moony, but you were indeed the best of the bunch.
James cleared his throat pointedly as he shot Remus and Sirius a look.
“Right, er” Remus started awkwardly. “We seem to have, uhm. I mean to say that-”
“Why does Y/N hate us?” Sirius spat, slapping a hand over his mouth immediately afterwards as if those words had fallen from his mouth without his consent.
“Y/N? As in your girlfriend, Y/N?” Regulus asked, moving his eyes between his brother and his brother’s boyfriend.
“Yes, as in our girlfriend.” Remus muttered.
“What did you say to offend her?” James asked unhelpfully.
“Do you think if we knew that, we’d be here right now?” Sirius spat back. 
“No, I don’t think that.” Regulus answered for him. “What I think has probably happened is she’s feeling terribly insecure in your relationship and neither of you have done anything to help her.”
Well that shut Sirius up... Sirius noticed that Remus was pretty quiet too.
“Were...” Sirius asked, grimacing when he looked over at Lily and James knowing this was teetering slightly into the realm of things-he-doesn’t-really-want-to-know-about-his-brother’s-relationship-with-his-best-friend territory. But damnit, Sirius was as desperate man. And desperate times called for desperate measures. “Were you terribly insecure when you started dating...these two?” Sirius sneered the end of his sentence earning him a ‘hey!’ from Lily and a solid whack up the back of the head from James.
“Yes.” Regulus answered simply.
“Why?” Remus asked, looking desperately close to pulling out his notebook to take notes. Scratch that, Sirius watched as James swallowed a teasing remark when Remus actually pulled out a notebook to take notes. 
“It’s hard coming after. There’s a part of your brain that convinces you that you are second best; that you’ve somehow come in second place. If that’s not bad enough, then you begin spending time with two people who already have history, already have a connection, and already have a rhythm that doesn’t leave much room to pull you into the mix. And if it does pull you into the mix, you end up feeling terribly guilty for disrupting that rhythm. It’s all quite difficult.”
Sirius’ mouth hung open at Regulus’ demure tone on what sounded like a really heartbreaking situation. 
“Let me ask you this,” Regulus continued, unawares of Sirius’ inner dialogue (which consisted mostly of panicked ‘oh my gods oh my gods oh my gods oh my gods). “How has your relationship – between the two of you – changed since you added a third?”
Remus and Sirius exchanged a glance before looking back at Regulus. “Uhm...not, really?”
“Not much at all.” Remus admitted more clearly.
“I see...” Regulus said, narrowing his gaze. “And how much time have each of you spent with her individually without the other present?”
Regulus got his answer in the form of awkward silence. 
“How did either of you expect your relationship to work if neither of you were willing to change the nature of yours in order to help it grow?” Regulus spat. 
“Well...” Remus started, but his sentence died when he realized there was nothing to say. 
“But...you stayed? Why?” Sirius asked his brother.
At this, Regulus’s face fell as he gave Sirius a sad smile. “Because of how we were raised, Sirius. I was so excited to be wanted, even for a moment, that I was willing to beg for scraps of whatever I could sink my claws into. She doesn’t strike me as that kind of girl.”
James and Lily looked forlorn as the latter placed her hand on Regulus’ shoulder consolingly. 
“It didn’t hurt to have the walking definition of unconditional love and the smartest, most intuitive witch I know to notice any discontent on my part.” He admitted shyly, earning him a smack of a kiss on the cheek from James.
“Gross. You guys are sickening.” Sirius muttered petulantly.
“So?” Lily interrupted what was close to becoming a squabble between the two Black brothers. “What are you guys going to do?”
Remus sported a determined expression as he looked to Sirius. “We’re going to make it right.”
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Shelby stood by her word and brought your breakfast. She also brought you lunch, and then dinner. But by the following morning, she was tired of playing the role of house elf.
“Alright, are you going to tell me why you’re avoiding Lupin and Black?” She asked plainly, plopping herself down uninvited onto your bed.
“Wha-? I’m ... I’m not avoiding them.” You lied poorly.
“Please; don’t spit on my muffin and call it frosting, Y/N. You’re obviously avoiding them.”
“I...ew?”
She groaned and fell onto her back in defeat. “Please, for all that is holy, tell me why they’ve been following me around like kicked puppies hoping I’ll take them to their master?”
You rolled your eyes and turned back to your book that you held open but had never been reading. “Yeah, I’m sure they’re real upset.” You muttered.
“That’s it.” She spat and plucked your book out of your hands, throwing it over her shoulder unceremoniously. You cringed to think about how Remus would feel seeing a book treated in such a way.
“I was reading that!”
“Don’t lie to me again.” She said, levelling you with a ‘no nonsense’ look. “Spill.”
You sighed deeply, looking toward the window to try and find the words you’d spent the last 24 hours trying to formulate. She never rushed you for your answer, giving you all the time you needed. 
“I feel insignificant.” You admitted finally.
“And?”
You turned to face her, bemusement painting your features. “What do you mean, and?”
“And... have you spoken to them about it?”
You felt a little embarrassed to admit that no, you hadn’t.
“Why not?”
And that simple question seemed to set off all the emotions (mostly frustration) that simmered beneath your surface.
“Because Shelby. Because I don’t want to have to beg for love and affection. I don’t want to have to tell people how to love me; they should just already love me. I don’t want to feel like I’m intruding in someone else’s relationship. I don’t want to have to point out that I’m here and I’m hurting. It’s mortifying. I... I think I’m just done.”
Shelby nodded in understanding before she stood from your bed. “Then you need to finish this today. No more hiding in your room being angry by yourself, and no more letting them sniff around the castle like dejected little runts. Put all three of you out of your misery.” 
It was your turn to nod as you too stood from your bed, ready to face possibly one of the most heartbreaking days of your life.
But Shelby was right; it was time. 
The worst part was that Shelby had been telling the truth; Remus and Sirius did look like kicked puppies. 
The second you had entered the Great Hall you heard a crash of knees against benches and cutlery clashing as Sirius clumsily tried to vacate his seat in record time to make it over to you.
“Y/N!” He called, as if you could have missed the racket he made just prior. 
He looked gaunt – like he hadn’t eaten or slept enough (in the only less than 48 hours) since you’d seen him last. His eyes were red and a little swollen, like he’d been rubbing at them.
You immediately felt sick with guilt; if he really was struggling with things with his family, the last thing you wanted was to add to his stress. But Sirius was looking after himself, and Remus was looking after him too; someone needed to think about you. You had to look after yourself.
Remus didn’t look much better, approaching the two of you much more slowly, hardly making eye contact with you as if you’d lash out at any moment. You had to admit that it annoyed you a little bit.
“Hi Sirius.” You offered, voice grating over the sudden tightness. “Remus.”
Some of the tension seemed to leave Remus’ shoulders as he made an effort to make eye contact with you.
“Can we talk?” He asked timidly. 
You knew what was coming, what was happening, what you yourself had come here planning to do.
But it broke your heart nonetheless.
“Sure.” You whispered, and exited the Great Hall without waiting to see if they were following you. 
You walked into an empty classroom and leaned against one of the walls as Remus and Sirius closed the door behind them. They shared another look and stood opposite of you.
More secret conversations. You thought bitterly. And doesn’t this just paint a lovely picture; them versus you. 
“Y/N. We, uhm...we’ve been talking, and we realized that...that maybe we haven’t gone about this the right way.” Sirius started, looking at Remus continuously as he addressed you. 
We’ve made a terrible mistake. 
“We didn’t take into account the ways in which our relationship would have to change in order to make the three of us work” Remus added.
We didn’t realize how much you’d take away from us, you heard
“We feel like we’ve been unfair to you, and... we’re really sorry.” Sirius concluded, looking like his heart had been ripped out of his rib cage. You supposed that would make sense, considering that’s how you currently felt yourself.
It probably hurt all the same to them – they’d be losing the friendships the three of you had created too; the friendship you had with Remus, the friendship you had with Sirius, and the fun the three of you had all together. But you still loved them, and the last thing you wanted to do was to interfere in their relationship.
“It’s okay, it wasn’t your fault.” You admitted finally. “It was just a mistake.”
Remus’ head cocked to the side like a confused puppy whilst Sirius’ eyebrows furrowed. “Well...I, I’m not sure-” Remus started but was cut off by Sirius.
“Wait, Y/N, what exactly do you think the mistake was?”
You looked between the two of them as you lifted your shoulder. “I... I guess including me?” You stated as a question.
Sirius actually sputtered as Remus stepped towards you, stopping himself seemingly before he made to grab you.
“No! No, Dove. That’s not a mistake!” He insisted.
“Are you kidding? You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to us – no, no. This...wow, okay. Can we start from the beginning, please? Why do you think this was a mistake?” Sirius managed to (barely) get out.
You looked to the ceiling, eyes stinging at the reality of having to voice your hurt. “Because” your voice came out embarrassingly high. “Because it-it felt...better when we were friends. I didn’t feel...in the way. And it felt easier. Just - I didn’t mean to come in between you, and I never...” you cut yourself off, quickly moving into hyperventilating territory. 
“But-”
“It’s not a mistake!” Sirius shouted, cutting Remus off. “This wasn’t a mistake! You weren’t a mistake. I... okay. I didn’t mean to fall in love with you, that’s true. But I don’t consider that a mistake. Not you, never you.”
“It was a surprise; a happy accident.” Remus added hopefully shy.
You felt drunk...dizzy...beyond confused. Weren’t they breaking up with you? Weren’t you supposed to be breaking up with them!?
“I think it was easier when we were friends because we weren’t putting so much pressure on ourselves to get this right.” Sirius explained.
Remus nodded and continued. “Sirius used to get so jealous if I got to hang out with you without him if he was at practice – took us a while to figure out that it was because he wished he was the one hanging out with you. When we started dating, I guess Sirius and I figured we’d just make sure to always hangout with you together so that neither of us felt left out. But we never even thought about how that must’ve been making you feel, dove. I’m so sorry.” 
“Regulus read us our rights.” Sirius admitted abashedly. “He pointed out that the relationship between the three of us will only work if our relationships with each other are strong. And we didn’t make our individual relationships with you a priority – that was our mistake, Y/N. Not you.” 
“Our mistake was believing you would just ‘catch up’ to where we are – which is years in the making – and also expecting you to somehow do that on your own. It was selfish and thoughtless.” Remus stressed
The things they were saying made sense and spoke to your very soul, but you couldn’t shake off this lingering feeling of dread.
“I... I should have said something... about how I was feeling.”
Sirius sighed, but it was Remus who spoke. “I think all of us could have done a better job communicating, that’s true. But we should have been more considerate. We asked you to join us, dove; we should have made that easy for you to do.”
“To think how much grief we’ve caused ourselves, when we could have just solved this all with a conversation.” Sirius mumbled dejectedly. 
“We’re not too late, are we? To solve this?” Remus asked quietly. Sirius’ eyes looked like they were close to popping out of his skull as he stood and made for you, grabbing your hands pleadingly.
“Oh gods, Y/N. You... you were breaking up with us, weren’t you? You thought we were breaking up with you?” His voice sounded very close to a sob.
“Please...please dove I- I don’t know that we deserve it, but please give us a chance to make this right, to do this properly. Give us a chance to love you the way you deserve.” Remus begged, moving to stand in front of you with Sirius, though he controlled his urge to grab your hands. 
You looked between the two boys; the two boys who you’ve been basically in love with for so long – the two boys who have proclaimed to feel the same way about you - and wondered to yourself again:
Have we made a terrible mistake?
Remus’ golden eyes shimmered with compassion and warmth, and Sirius burned fiercely in devotion and promises.  
Had you made a mistake? Falling in love with them?
No.
Perhaps Remus was right. Perhaps this was a happy accident.
“Okay.” You whispered. Remus exhaled the breath he’d been holding while Sirius’ face morphed into a small, hopeful kind of smile – far shyer than you were used to seeing from the boy.
“Okay?” He asked, moving his hands up from your wrists to your shoulders.
“Yeah... I-I don’t want to lose you guys.” You admitted wetly, a tear betraying you as it fell down your cheek. Sirius was quick to catch it with his thumb.
“Never, dove. Not if I can help it.” Remus promised. 
You believed him.  
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moonstruckme · 1 month
Note
hi! i've been stalking your page for literal hours and i love how you write poly marauders so much!! could you write how they would react to the reader coming home from a night out with a black eye or something like that?? <33333
Thank you lovely! And thanks for being so patient while I took literal months to get to this request haha, love you! <3
cw: reader is drunk and has a black eye
poly!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 1.2k words
“Hey, gorgeous,” Sirius says as you come in the door. Remus shushes him, and he lowers his voice. “How’re the girls?” 
“Good,” you reply, cautiously quiet as you kick off your shoes. 
Rounding the couch, you see James asleep on Remus’ shoulder, a small puddle of drool soaking into the material of the taller boy’s pajama shirt. They’re all in pajamas, actually. Envy strikes you through the heart. They look so unbearably cozy, better than you in your scratchy jeans and too-tight top. 
“I hope you didn’t wait up,” you say as Remus flips his book closed, and Sirius chuckles. You’ll learn later that you’d been slurring your words. 
“We don’t mind,” Remus confirms your suspicions. “You didn’t walk home by yourself, did you?” 
You shake your head, flopping into the spot beside James on the couch. Only you hadn’t quite thought that through, and Remus tuts as he starts to rouse. 
“Sorry,” you whisper. “Um, the girls dropped me off out front.” 
Sirius nods his approval. James hums as he picks his head up off Remus’ shoulder, spotting you. 
“Hey, lovie.” He transfers his affections to you, wrapping his arms around your neck and letting himself weigh heavily against your front. You giggle, your favorite monkey. “Did you just get home?” 
“Uh-huh. Oh, Jamie!” You gasp as a memory makes its way out of the fog of your brain. “I saw something you would have loved.” 
“What’s that?” he asks. 
“We came across a dog park, and I didn’t even know those could be open at night but—” 
“No, angel.” He’s stopped hugging you, an unpleasant development, one of his hands leaving your neck to hold your cheek. “What’s that on your face?” 
“Hm?” You don’t remember anything getting on your face. “I dunno. Jamie, I’m trying to tell you about the puppies.” 
“Just hold on, darling, sorry. Is that a bruise?” 
“What?” Sirius is in front of you before you know what’s happened. Vampire-fast, you think fascinatedly, wondering if he’d have been a streak across your vision had you bothered to look. Though, to be fair, your vision is generally streaky at the moment. He takes your chin in his hand, tilting it up and to the side. “Remus, point your light here.” 
There’s a low creaking as Remus adjusts his reading lamp, and then you’re squeezing your eyes shut. 
“Jesus, what the hell?” 
Remus curses softly, and you squint to see him leaning closer to you. Your boyfriends’ faces crowd your vision like a three-headed monster. 
“Baby,” Sirius says, sounding heartbroken, “what happened?” 
“I don’t—can you move the light away?” 
More creaking, and you can see again. You blink, eyes watery, and Sirius lays a painstakingly gentle thumb over the skin beneath your eye. 
“It must be bad if it’s already bruising,” he says. 
Remus stands. “Then we should put ice on it.” 
You pout as he disappears into the kitchen, but Sirius recaptures your attention by turning your face toward his. 
“I need you to think.” He fixes his stare on yours gravely. His eyes are the color of the moon reflecting off water. You try to tell him so, but his frown doesn’t abate. “Listen,” he says, “what happened to hurt your eye? You have to remember.” 
You purse your lips, shaking your head at him. “I feel like I’d know if something happened,” you say self-assuredly. “It’s probably just makeup. Can you get me a wipe?” 
“Angel.” James’ eyebrows have hooked upwards in the middle. He’s looking uncharacteristically serious, too. Your boyfriends are really not being a ton of fun tonight, you think. “It’s all red and purple. You can’t tell me that doesn’t hurt, babydoll.” 
You shrug. That may be so. But if it doesn’t hurt, who really cares? 
Sirius gets up just as Remus comes back with what looks like a balled-up dish towel. He passes it to you with a tender look on his face. 
“Put this on your eye, honey,” he says. Then, “Sirius, love, where are you going?” 
“To call Evans.” 
You touch the cloth to your eye, but it’s freezing cold, and you opt to let it rest in your lap instead.
“She won’t even be home yet,” Remus argues. “And what do you think you’ll accomplish if you do get ahold of her? She can’t tell us anything now that she won’t still know in the morning.” 
“What if somebody did this to her? If Evans saw, I want to know about it tonight.” 
“Don’t you think,” James says, “that if someone hit her, the girls would’ve come in and told us?” You lean against his side, and he wraps an arm around you automatically, rubbing your shoulder. He smells like strawberries and laundry detergent and something ineffably homey. “They wouldn’t have just dropped her off out front.” 
“What if no one saw?” 
“Then what do you think calling will do, love?” 
“I just…I feel like I have to do something. Don’t you?” 
You lean your head on James’ shoulder and snuggle into the familiar sounds of your boyfriends’ voices, overlapping and intermingling. You don’t realize they’ve gone quiet until Remus’ hand wraps around yours, and you open your eyes. 
“You’ve got to actually hold this on your eye,” he chides lovingly, taking the dish towel from you and pressing it to your face. 
The edge of something hard beneath the cloth digs into a tender spot beneath your eye, and you flinch. “Ow.” 
Remus’ forehead creases sympathetically. “Sorry.” 
But the pain brings another memory out of the fog. You pick your head up as you feel your good eye widen in realization, meeting Sirius’. 
He flicks up an eyebrow. “What’re you smiling about?” 
“I remember what happened,” you admit, a touch of embarrassment to your tone. And if you hadn’t had everyone’s attention before, you do now. 
“What was it?” James rubs your shoulder reassuringly. “You can tell us.” 
“It’s…when we were at the dog park, I got distracted.” 
Remus’ eyes narrow. “Go on.” 
You rub your lips together self-consciously. “I may have walked into a sign. About poop bags.” 
James leans away from you to see you better. “Like, a metal sign?” 
You nod, and he winces. 
“Ouch, lovie.” 
“Fucking hell.” Sirius covers his face with both hands, loosing a big breath through the cracks in his palms. Remus reaches back to pats his leg consolingly. “I was ready to go after whoever did that with a tire iron.” 
You shrink into the couch cushions. “Sorry.” 
“You could still take a tire iron to the sign, I suppose,” James says. 
Sirius ignores him, crouching in front of you and taking your face in both hands. Remus lets the cloth drop rather than maneuver around him. “Don’t ever scare me like that again, understand?” 
“Yeah,” James agrees, “if you injure yourself in the future, ask for a pen and make a note on your arm or something. Save us the worry.” 
You lean forward, pressing a lingering, heartfelt kiss to Sirius’ cheek. 
“Thanks for worrying,” you say, and where your lips touched him the skin glows pink. 
“You’re taking years of my life, you know,” he says quietly. 
Remus chuckles. “Don’t worry. It looks good on you.” 
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bettysupremacy · 3 months
Note
hii! I was wondering if you could write a fic with reader and any marauder (they all fit) and maybe helping or becoming protective over the reader after a concert or party after a creep follows the reader? 😭
I went through a similar experience with a guy following me around after I went to the restroom after a concert, and it ruined my night if i'm being honest, I was scared 😞 I'm not the most shy of people and usually I can handle myself but it was pretty dark and idk the adrenaline from feeling happy to scared shifted pretty quickly. Luckily I found my friends and let them know and we quickly went back to our car (along with a few dirty looks from my friends god bless lol). I swore I could go to the restroom by myself- will not be doing that again :(
you can ignore this request if it makes you uncomfortable!
thank uu
i’m so sorry that happened to you! “(they all fit)”= poly marauders!
There’s something about post concert depression, especially when you’re with the band.
Your glitter eyeshadow is smudged, eyeliner untouched. You’d been shaken around in the pit of your boyfriends fans, and yet the paint hasn’t budged. God bless water-proof makeup. The world seems prettier like this, touched by alcohol and the feeling of soaring pride for your boyfriends. The glittery lights and signs of time square never fail to dazzle you, even now as you lean against Sirius morosely.
“M’hungry.” You frown, toes tipping up towards Sirius, though you fear the mumble may have been more for yourself.
His attention is diverted towards the boys as they discuss what to do now. Plans of how to get home and where to eat. His finger taps your cheek slowly, his focus paying you no mind. Words like Uber, hotel, room service echo throughout their very repetitive conversation.
“Sirius.”
He looks down, a little shocked and sorry at his own attention. “Yes, lovely?”
“M’hungry.”
“Hungry?” He asks, cringing. You’re about thirty minutes from the hotel, and even then, room service will take another thirty.
“So hungry.”
He sighs, unsure of what to do.
“There’s a hotdog stand over there.” You grab his tattooed bicep to balance yourself as you point to your right.
He thinks, peering down at you. “This won’t ruin your dinner?” It’s midnight, but still.
“No,” you sing, reaching up to cup his cheeks. “I really want a hotdog.
He flushes, looking away from your wandering eyes. Normally he wouldn’t let you out of his sight. They would never let you out of their sight in a place like this. But the cart is in eye view of the boys, and he has faith in you not to stray, even in your inebriated manor. It’s not that they don’t trust you, they just prefer to keep you safe themselves. Is that okay?
“Okay,” He murmurs, pulling out his wallet, handing you his card. “At least get the good toppings.”
“I always get the good toppings.” You pull away.
The walk is short and the cart is colorful. Red and white stripes, curvy calligraphy. It shines in your inebriated vision. Beautiful. The queues not long, just an older man waiting in front of you, but it feels like forever as the generous man (with the toppings as well) takes your order and wraps it in warm aluminum foil.
You take the hotdog eagerly. “Thank you.”
It’s heavy in your hands, warm too. You yell Sirius’ name excitedly, waving the hotdog above your head for him to see. He laughs, thumbs up until you bump into a man, smile fading, concern etching his brows.
“Oh,” you murmur, looking up. “I’m sorry.”
“No problem,” he smiles. It’s uncomfortable, not the smile of a friendly civilian.
You laugh. It’s polite, anyone can see that, but he leans closer. He smells like liquor, a disgusting discovery that has you subconsciously leaning away.
“You new around here?”
An actual laugh stumbles out of your lips. “London? No.”
He takes this as an entrance. “You should show me around.”
“No, thank you.” You try to walk past him. Towards Sirius who’s already walking over. “Goodnight.”
“Wait,” he grabs your arm, pulling you back. His fingers dig into your elbow painfully.
“What the fuck,” you gasp, pulling your arm away roughly. “don’t touch me.”
“C’mon,” The man slurs, fingers reaching for you again. “Don’t be-“
“Hello?” Sirius walks up, all stock. He grabs your forearm pulling you to him firmly, getting in between you and the man. He’s not much taller, but more intimidating in demeanor. “Do we have a problem?”
“No,” the man scoffs.
“Cause it looks like you put your hands on her.”
He scoffs again, clearly inebriated. “We were just talking.”
“Well, conversations over now.”
“She can make her own decisions.”
“Fuck off, bro.” Sirius waves his hand dismissively. Quickly, he walks you towards the boys who are peeking their eyes up from the Uber app.
“She was asking for it.”
Sirius reels back, dropping your forearm to shove the scary stranger in the chest. He pushes hard, the man losing his balance as he falls to the ground in a sickening thud. You gasp loudly, the unexpected conflict startling you. Vaguely you hear Sirius say something to him, but you’re too focused on the way the man looks up at you.
James and Remus are there in seconds, quick on Sirius’s heels. They pull at him, up and off the man. There were no real punches thrown, no real injuring blows, it wasn’t even enough to form a crowd. But still, you’re shaken. You shiver like a leaf under your James’ leather jacket, suddenly not feeling the warmth of the alcohol you’d consumed before the concert.
Slowly, you stumble back and way from your boys, to the bench next to the shitty bar you’d passed on your way home. That had been scary, but you’re safe; that had been scary, but Sirius dealt with it. You bring your hand up to your chest, setting the hotdog you had been eager to buy down next to you.
“Hi,” Remus pushes aside the hotdog to sit next to you. “Are you okay?”
You look up to the boy, blindingly beautiful in the streetlights and advertisements. “Yes.”
He pushes some stray hair from your face. “He didn’t hurt you?”
“I think it was more startling.” James sits on the other side of you, kissing your temple firmly. “I’m sorry he did that.”
“It’s okay, I’m okay.”
“She’s okay.” Sirius gruffs from where he walks over.
He sounds cooler than he thinks he looks. He’s not bruised, bloodied, or bandaged, if he were he thinks he’d look cool enough to breeze over. But then again you look mad, so maybe he doesn’t want that.
“Don’t be upset,” Sirius crouches to your level. You’re in the arms of a solid Remus. “he was a creep.”
“Are you hurt?”
“Are you trying to tell me something?” He laughs roguishly. “I thought I looked good tousled.”
He does, and you know he’ll look good on the tabloids tomorrow too. Sirius black gives black eye? You sigh at the thought.
“You do.” James feeds Sirius.
“At least someone in this relationship cares for my ego.”
“You look good.”
“Oh, now you tell me.”
You laugh, letting Sirius stare at you like you hung the moon.
“Kiss em?” He pushes his knuckles in front of your lips. His fingers throb lightly, you can feel it on your lips.
“That was stupid.”
“C’mon,” Sirius’ eyes roll as he pulls you up. “You’ve got a hotdog to eat.”
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writtenbymoonflower · 3 months
Text
Dinner
You have a panic attack and your boys comfort you. poly!maruaders x fem!reader
cw: panic attack, negative self talk, swearing, mention of raw chicken (ew ik)
1.7k words (it's long i'm sorry)
You never thought you would cry over chicken, but here you were. You knew that you had been having a lot of busy days as of late, there were a million things swimming about in your head. But you were managing it well, or at least you thought you were. But then it all came down.
You had bought a pack of chicken earlier in the week to cook for dinner one night. It had been on clearance so you knew it was  on its way out, but you thought you would’ve had more time. You opened your fridge so you could begin cooking before your boyfriends were going to get too hungry, when you realized that the meat was out of date by a whole three days. It was something so small, yet, it sent a billion anxious thoughts jumping around your head like they were on pogo sticks, and most of them were not very nice. 
How could you be so stupid? You should’ve checked the date. If you hadn't been so lazy earlier this week you wouldn’t be wasting this food. Now there was nothing to cook and your boyfriends would go hungry. They would likely end up resenting you for being a shit girlfriend and being so-
“Dolly? What are you doing over there?” Usually Sirius’ voice was a comfort to you, but right now it just added to your misery. It reminded you of all your failures and why you would never be good enough for anyone. 
Tears started filling your eyes. You tried to still your shaking hands and even your breathing, but it was all too much. They were going to realize your mistake and were going to be angry. His footsteps were painful and your other boyfriends’ laughter in the other room made you wince. When Sirius finally was facing you, your attempt at a facade fell apart. He knew you too well and apparently your body just decided to give over to panic because you suddenly couldn’t catch your breath. You tried to mutter out an apology but your voice was caught in your throat and your pulse was hammering. 
“ Hey.” Sirius’ dark brows scrunched in concern, his gray eyes searching your face and scanning your body for any injury. “What’s wrong?” His voice was raised in panic as you stood and shook. 
Apparently Sirius’ voice triggered your other two boyfriends to barrel into the room, but you refused to look at any of them, opting to hold the chicken package behind your back and stare at the ground. James thought you looked like a small child standing in front of a broken glass, ready to be reprimanded and punished. It made his heart ache. 
“Baby,” Sirius continued to beg for a response. “What’s happened? You’re scaring me.” Remus placed a soothing hand on his partner’s back while James scooted past the both of them to grab your shoulders and stoop to see your face. 
“Hey, hey, hey. Sweetheart, can you look at me?” James spoke softly. He was just as concerned as the other two, but James was better at keeping his head, even though inside he wanted to sob seeing you like this. You swallowed thickly and looked up at him. 
“There you go.” Remus whispered encouragement from behind James. Your chest was still heaving and you were still crying, but now they could read your face better. 
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, I-” You choked out, hoping that if you spoke about your failure early enough they might forgive your mistake.
“Hey, not right now. Just focus on me, honey. I think you’re having a panic attack, I need you to try and steady your breathing.” James motioned the other two over, Remus getting behind you and pulling you both to the ground so he could rock you in his lap. Sirius and James sat and each took one of your hands, James putting the one he was holding on his chest, while Sirius put the other on yours. (After throwing the chicken on the counter, opting to ask questions after you could speak again.) You stifled another sob from wracking your body. 
“We’ve got you, sweet girl. Just copy Prongs’ breaths, yeah?” Sirius used his free hand to tilt your chin up to meet the eyes of the two boys in front of you. You could feel James’ chest rising and falling as he took deep, exaggerated breaths. Your first few were shaky and clumsy, but soon you were finally able to get a comfortable amount of air in your lungs and your tears slowed to a stop. You still felt guilty, but at least now your head wasn’t so loud. You pulled your hands back into your lap.
“There you go,” Remus soothed from behind you. “Atta girl.” He pressed gentle kisses all over the side of your neck. You could see the two boys in front of you visibly relax at your now calmer state. “Good girl, you did so well. I know that was scary.” Remus turned so you were sitting sideways in his lap and you could see all three of the boys sitting around you. 
“ Thank you for helping.” You said sheepishly, looking down at your fidgeting hands. “I’m sorry I did that, I know it was a lot.” 
“None of that.” Sirius said firmly. “It’s not your fault, baby. You didn’t do it to be bad, you have nothing to be sorry for.” 
Wrong. You thought to yourself, remembering the spoiled food now sitting on the counter. 
“Can you tell us what happened, lovely?” James ducked his gaze to meet yours, his brown eyes were sad and confused and swimming with all too much love. 
You really didn’t want to admit your mistake, but they deserved an explanation for your erratic behavior. 
“It’s really nothing that bad.” You tried to console, as if you weren’t the one shaking on the floor not two minutes ago. “I was just-” You swallowed hard again. “I was being stupid.” You went back to picking at your nails. Your self-deprecating comment made Remus raise an eyebrow and Sirius lightly pinch your thigh. 
“You weren’t. You’re never stupid, be nice.” Remus (lovingly) scolded. 
“I was just, I bought this chicken.” You struggled to keep your breathing even. “I bought this chicken earlier this week and I was going to cook it, but I was too lazy these last few days and I fucked up and I-” You bit hard on your lip to keep from crying again. James desperately wanted to reprimand you for your self-cruelty, but he settled for grabbing Sirius’ hand and squeezing, not wanting to cut you off. 
“Go on, sweetheart. Take your time.” James spoke even softer. 
“I let the chicken go bad. I wanted to cook tonight but when I went to grab the chicken it was bad and I just- I just felt bad because I can’t do anything right. I had all week to make it and now I can’t cook for you all and I just- I just feel bad.” You took another deep breath, still not wanting to meet their eyes.
“Oh, my baby.” Sirius lunged forward, wrapping you in his arms before you could even process what was happening. Remus huffed grumpily over you being stolen from his lap, but let it go. “That’s what you were all worked up about? That’s why you were all scared?” You nodded, your face still stuck in the crook of his neck. 
“It’s okay,” James soothed, now smoothing a gentle path up and down your back. “That happens to everyone, sweetheart. It’s not something you need to be mad at yourself for. You didn’t do anything wrong, and you weren’t lazy. You’ve been busy and tired. It just happens.” James thought he could cry, his girl was so hard on herself that she was all panicked over something like this. 
“Exactly.” Remus said. “It’s nothing we can’t fix, dove. We can go to the store tomorrow and you can make it then.” You started to protest, wanting to go tonight but you were quickly cut off. “Tomorrow.” Remus was firm, but no less kind. “You aren’t doing any work tonight. You need to rest. We’ll figure something out for dinner, it’s no trouble.” 
You were going to argue but you figured it was a losing battle. 
“Thought you would be mad at me.You should be mad at me. I fucked u-” You couldn’t even finish the sentence before James squawked, Sirius sputtered, and Remus inhaled sharply. Sirius forced your head out of his neck to look at you. 
“What?!” He looked genuinely offended.
“Lovely,” James was the one who formed a full sentence. “We would never be mad at you for something like this. Never.” He grabbed your chin to make you look at him. “Look at us, sweet girl. No ones mad at you. We care about you, not a pack of chicken. It’s not worth you being this mean to yourself, nothing is.” He pouted during the last sentence. 
“Also,” Sirius said, still being very gentle. “I’m pretty sure this isn’t just about chicken, dollface. You’ve been really stressed lately.” 
“And you’ve been really hard on yourself. You always have been, but it’s gotten worse.” Remus’ voice sounding sad. You knew he was right though. 
“I know.” You sighed, dejectedly. “I’ll try to be better.” You gave them all a tight-lipped smile. 
“That’s what we mean!” James whined. “You don’t need to ‘be better.’ You just need to be gentle with yourself.” 
“It’s just hard.” You admitted. 
“I know it is, baby.” Sirius empathized. Then his face morphed into his usual grin. “How about, we all lead by example. I know I can be very nice to you.” He took your cheeks in both his hands and started pressing kisses all over your face. You giggled wetly, trying to squirm out of his grasp. “There, like that. Nice.”
“I don’t know how she is gonna do that, Pads. It’s hard to kiss your own face.” Remus attempted (and failed) to keep the amused tilt out of his voice. 
“Oh no!” James dramatically gasped. “I guess we’ll just have to.” He beamed, taking your jaw in his hand to smear even more kisses on your cheeks.
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bruisedboys · 8 months
Note
Shy!reader who's brain is running a million miles per hour and Sirius who notices and decides to pull her into a secret room for doting kisses and sweet compliments???
thank you for your request lovely! <333
sirius black x fem!reader
You don’t know how Sirius has managed to weasel you out of the thick of the party and into his friend’s bathroom, but here you are, alone with Sirius in Remus Lupin’s bathroom and trying not to act like this is exactly what you wanted.
“Sirius,” you say, breathless as you watch him close the door and then spin round to face you, grinning. “What are you doing?”
Sirius shrugs. “Just trying to get some alone time with my girl. Sue me.”
My girl. You try not to buckle at the knees. “Alone time? I thought you liked parties.”
“I only like whatever you like.”
You glare at him. He’s being awful on purpose. “Don’t you want to go hang out with your friends?”
“Not if you don’t want to,” Sirius says, moving towards you. You know he’s gonna grab you before he does, hands hot at your hips as he pulls you towards him. “I was watching you out there, you know. You looked like you weren’t having a good time.”
“Did I?” You ask, horrified. “Sirius, why didn’t you tell me earlier?” You push at his chest as if that’s gonna do anything. He’s much stronger than you. In more ways than one. “I don’t want Remus to think I’m a priss.”
Sirius laughs. “Dove,” he says, chiding and amused. “He doesn’t think that. The only reason I noticed is ‘cos I know you so well.” He strokes your cheek with his thumb as if to say, yeah, I know you, and I love you all the same. “You’d’ve looked completely lovely to everyone else.”
“Ugh,” you say, as if you’re grossed out by his fondness rather than totally enthralled. Your burning cheeks say otherwise.
“Ugh,” Sirius copies agreeably. “You’re okay, though? We can leave if you need, babe. I swear I don’t mind.”
You’re shaking your head before he’s even finished his sentence. “No, I’m okay. We can stay.”
“Are you sure? I don’t want you having an awful time.”
“I’m not,” you say honestly. You were overwhelmed earlier but that doesn’t mean you wouldn’t have handled it for Sirius’ sake. He’s handled a lot worse for your sake.
Sirius raises his eyebrows, looking incredibly handsome. “Promise?”
You smile at him. “Promise.”
Sirius smiles back, all pearly white teeth and the dusty pink lips. You’re not surprised when he ducks in to kiss you. You let him because you like him a lot and you could really use a kiss right now. He’s right of course, you had been having a hard time out in the living room. You’d just been beginning to spiral when Sirius had appeared out of nowhere and whisked you away like he could read your mind. Now, he kisses you with all the care of someone who knows you like the back of his hand, and all the electricity of a boy in love.
He backs you up against the sink, hands firm at your hips, kissing and kissing, but pulls back just when you think he’s about to really get carried away. You’re grateful because you’d hate to be discovered like this by one of his friends and you think he knows that.
“I love you,” he says, ducking in for another quick kiss that’s brief but sweet enough to leave you reeling. “Promise you’ll let me know if you want to get out of here, yeah?”
“Okay,” you nod, frazzled by his kissing and his sweetness.
Sirius smiles a dizzying smile and chucks you under the chin. “C’mon, lovely girl,” he takes your hand and tugs you towards the door. “Wanna help me win poker?”
He knows you’re no good at card games — he just wants you in his lap as his so-called lucky charm. Lucky for him, you can’t think of anything else you’d rather do.
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underoospeterparker · 2 months
Note
okay i really hope this makes sense because i love your writing - shy!reader x remus <3
reader is in the wrong place at the wrong time and gets detention for something she didn’t do - too shy and nervous to speak up for herself. when reader doesn’t meet up on time with remus he begins to worry
thank you for requesting! writing in the actual harry potter universe is tough, but i really like how it turned out!
grumpy!remus lupin x shy!fem!reader, 0.7k words
Remus paced back and forth in the hallway, frantically trying to think of an excuse as to why you might be late. James and Sirius watched him, clearly amused at his antics.
"Moony," James spoke up, "might I remind you that she's only ten minutes late?"
He turned around with an annoyed look on his face, a frown turning the corner of his lips downward. "No, you may not."
Sirius burst into laughter, clutching at James's blazer to steady himself. When he took a look at Remus's face, he fell silent. "Sorry," he murmured, "that was not funny."
"She's never late," he said, mostly to himself rather than to his best friends, "maybe I should check her classroom?" He paused, then answered his own question. "Yes. I'll do that. See you later, guys," Remus added, before heading off in the opposite direction of the Great Hall for lunch.
James sighed in mock disappointment. "Now what'll we do?"
Sirius played along, grin wide on his face. "Well," he said thoughtfully, "we'll have to follow him. I mean, what else could we possibly do?
-
You sat, hands shaking, in front of your professor. The only sound was the clicking of his pen as he surveyed you. "I don't understand what I did wrong," you managed, looking at your lap because you could not meet his gaze.
Snape stared at you, an incredulous look on his face. "You don't understand what you did wrong?" He repeated your statement. "Well, let me remind you, (Y/N). A student told me that she saw you in the bathroom, attempting to perform an expulso curse."
You didn't say anything. You knew it was Pansy, but if you said anything, which you wouldn't have done anyway, she would do much worse to you. "I'm sorry," you murmured, your voice quiet.
He nodded, a stern look on his face. "Do not let me catch you doing that again," he said, then paused. "Detention, then. Two weeks, starting today. 6'o clock. Don't be late," he added, then motioned for you to leave.
Packing up your things, you left in a hurry. You bumped straight into Remus, who had been making his way to your classroom. He steadied you, setting a hand on your hip. When he spoke, his voice was gentle. "Hey, where've you been? I've been looking for you everywhere, I-"
He was cut off by you promptly bursting into tears, hiding your face in the crook of his blazer. "Oh," he murmured. He wrapped his arms around you, hand going up to soothingly scratch at your scalp. "Oh, angel, you're okay," he murmured softly. "It's okay."
You sniffled, and the sound made his chest hurt as you burrowed your head further into his jacket. Then, you pulled away, bringing your sleeve up to wipe at your eyes hastily.
"I'm sorry," you whispered. You tried to explain yourself. "I was in the bathroom at the wrong time," you said, and Remus raised an eyebrow. "Snape thought I was trying to do an expulso curse."
"But you weren't," Remus said slowly. "Of course you weren't. Must've been Pansy, the little git." When you nodded, he asked, "Why didn't you say anything?"
You shook your head. "I didn't want to get in more trouble."
You looked up at him, and his eyes softened. "I get it," he said, although if it had been up to him, he would have blamed it on her to get you out of trouble. Remus swung an arm around your shoulder, pulling you back into his chest, which you went into gladly. "So, how many days of detention?"
Wincing, you replied, "two weeks."
He groaned, then said, "how am I supposed to go that long without seeing my best girl?"
You laughed. "You'll see me at lunch, and at Charms."
He pressed a kiss to your head. "Nope. I gotta get into some sort of trouble so I can be in detention with you, sweetheart."
Your eyes widened when James and Sirius popped out from behind the corner, identical mischievous grins on their faces.
Sirius was the first to speak up. "Did someone say trouble?"
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reysdriver · 1 year
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Wife | S.B.
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(part 1 to this fic) You and Sirius had been married in a wedding arranged by your pureblood parents, and he's the only one you think to go to after running away — sirius x fem!pureblood!reader hurt/comfort
warnings: abusive families (for both reader and Sirius), forced marriage, abuse, mentions of injury, angst
words: 2k
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A frown sat still across your face while your mother tightly strung up the thin braids in your hair with bobby pins. You held back winces every time the metal poked into your already-pained scalp.
She fixed the last braid into the hairdo, then stood in front of you, judging coldly.
"Am I presentable, Mother?" You asked, snark laced in every word.
Normally, you would never dare speak to a relative like this, but today was your wedding day. Your bags were already packed for school in a week, so you wouldn't face her for a while. And, in two years, you were to graduate from Hogwarts and move in with the Blacks, so you really had nothing to lose when it came to your awful pureblood family.
"This attitude is exactly why your marriage prospects were so slim." She tells you. 
They were slim, and your family had warned you several times while arranging the marriage that you would have to be with him forever. They said a divorce would be twice as shameful for your family name since you wouldn't be able to find a new husband. There was a limited dating pool for sacred twenty eight Gryffindor teens who were openly opposed to their family values. 
You tried not to feel upset at the memory of all those times your family had called you a disgrace, claiming that's why you and Sirius Black were perfect for eachother. 
"Well, there's nothing else we can do before the wedding, we should be on our way to the ceremony as soon as possible." Your mother announced curtly. 
You stood up, your giant wedding dress feeling heavier than ever. You placed the veil over your face, the thin material clouding your vision slightly. 
There was no turning back now. There was never any turning back since you had little say in the whole matter, but now there was really no escape. 
Your mother surveyed your look one more time, lacking any visible emotion that should be present on one's daughter's wedding day.
"Don't slouch or speak without being spoken to. Don't embarrass our family name." She ordered.
Although you were young and had no intentions of really being married, you were counting down the days until you would be away from your family.
You said nothing in return as you started to walk towards the door. Your father was standing just outside, ready to walk you down the aisle.
He didn't say anything to you that wasn't already said by your mother, which made you want to roll your eyes harder than anything that day.
Once you started walking down the carpeted aisle, you felt as if all sound flushed from the room. It wasn't that the sounds had really stopped, it was just that you were so nervous, you couldn't process any noise.
Sirius looked handsome, to say the least. You felt slightly guilty for focusing on his looks, but you two were getting married. You were in the same classes at school and you had caught yourself gazing at him in the common room a few times, but never thought about marrying him before your parents set it up.
Your father let go of your arm, and you stepped up to the altar, parallel to Sirius. You looked into his captivating eyes and accepted your fate.
✦✧✦✧✦
Even though you were married, you barely spoke to Sirius. A few words during classes or in the common room, but that was it. You both thought it was best to push each other away and pretend everything was normal for as long as you could. A kiss at the wedding and a long conversation when you were together in his room after the wedding was all that had happened, and it was how you wanted to keep things for the time being. 
Sirius was nowhere near the husband your parents had always wanted for you, but you were at a loss. You tried one last time to think of solutions as you stood on the Potters' porch. You knocked on the door and waited for someone to answer. 
An older woman came to the door; you knew it was James' mother since you had seen her on Platform 9 ¾ several times before. She looked shocked at your appearance, and you couldn't blame her. Your eyes red and exhausted, multiple cuts on your face, and blotchy skin caused by a mix of snow and crying. 
"Is Sirius here?" You asked with a sob before she could say anything. 
"Oh dear, come inside, love. Quickly, you look like you've just been dragged here from across the country." The woman placed a hand on your shoulder, ushering you inside her house. 
You let out another sob and more tears started falling down your face the moment she closed the door and you felt the house's heat. "I'm sorry." You mumbled. 
"Don't be sorry, darling. Just come with me so I can make you a nice cup of hot tea." 
While she walked you to the kitchen, she had introduced herself formally. She also recognised you, knowing your name and likely more about your family. It was rare for a person of pureblood status to not recognise you, so you weren't fazed by it. 
You were sitting at her kitchen table, and she handed you a steaming teacup. You took a sip, ignoring how painfully hot it was against your tongue and your throat. 
"Thank you." You sniffled, taking another scalding sip. "I don't mean to burden you, I just need to see Sirius. Please tell me he's here."
"He is, yes. May I ask why you need to see him?" She asked, standing up and walking towards a set of stairs. 
You looked down shamefully, almost embarrassed to admit it. 
"I'm his wife."
Euphemia's eyes widened, and although she had been nothing but sweet to you, you were afraid she was judging. You hoped she would understand as a fellow pureblood, but you knew that your families were vastly different and she likely chose her husband for love. 
She opened her mouth, and you half-expected her to string insults at you and your family. Instead, she looked to the top of the stairs and called for Sirius. "There's a girl here who's asking for you." 
You heard a laugh from James and Sirius, followed by two sets of footsteps coming down the stairs. When they reached Euphemia, she directed Sirius to you, telling him 'your wife is in the kitchen'. 
Sirius walked into the room, and he looked heartbroken to see you. It took just barely a glance for him to understand what was happening. You were going through the same thing he was just a year ago. 
Your head dropped, once again feeling a needless feeling of shame overtake you. 
"I'm sorry." You mumbled as he walked towards you. You weren't quite expecting him to embrace you in a tight hug, but he did, and you weren't going to push him away. "I'm sorry, Sirius. I just had to get away from them. I didn't know where else to go." 
He placed a gentle kiss on your hairline as he rubbed your back. "Don't be sorry, love. I understand. You made the right decision to come here."
He unwrapped his arms from around your torso and looked at your shaking figure. You could see he pitied you, and that felt awful. You had been raised to never let anyone take pity on you. 
Euphemia stood at the other side of the room with a raised eyebrow. "Sirius Black, why didn't you say anything about being married?"
He turned to her, about to explain when you rushed to his defence. "It's not his fault, Mrs. Potter. We both just wanted to pretend it never happened for as long as possible. That was a decision we both made right away."
"We don't wear the rings at school, and we barely even talk to each other." He added. 
"Well, that's a problem." Euphemia told him. "If you had shown you cared about this poor girl, maybe she could have escaped her family before it escalated to this! You could have taken her with you when you first came here."
Neither you or Sirius were going to argue with the woman. She walked towards you with concern in her eyes, then stopped to examine you just as Sirius had done a few seconds previous. 
"We need to get you cleaned up, healed in any way we can, and into some warm clothes. You can stay for as long as you'd like."
You didn't want the family to go through any trouble for you. "No, I don't want to be a burden."
"Stop that, darling. You should stay here, we'll be more than happy to give you anything you need. And what you need first is to get healed, come with me. I can fix you up just fine."
You stood up, ready to go wherever she wanted to take you, but Sirius placed a gentle hand on your wrist that made you shift your attention to him. 
"I can take care of her, Effie." He told her. 
"Don't be ridiculous, Sirius. As much as you want to help, this is important and needs to be taken care of by someone with experience."
"I do have experience. I was in her place just a year ago. I know exactly what she's going through." 
His hand kept its place on your wrist, but he loosened his grip. His eyes were soft and gentle. Both you and Euphemia could tell her really did want to help. He was almost pleading silently, and who were you to decline your husband of that?
Before you could accept his offer, Euphemia spoke up for you, not willing to argue any more as long as it helped you. 
"Alright. I'll get James to make up a guest room for you, dear."
She walked ahead, instructing James to prepare a place for you to sleep while you and Sirius stayed back on the main floor. 
Breaking the tense silence between you, Sirius apologised. "I'm sorry, she's right, I knew what your family was like and I left you there. I should have cared for you." 
"Don't be sorry. You didn't need to do anything, I wasn't your responsibility."
"You're my wife." He said, soft desperation soaking that last word. "And I'm your husband."
"Sirius, we're strangers, classmates at best. We don't even speak at school, let alone invite each other to run away to safety together. Our laundry may have been mixed up before, but other than accidentally sharing ties, we're not close at all."
"I wish we could be. I always have." 
You were shocked by the confession. For practically being strangers, that was quite an admittance of feelings. You could already feel the tears coming back to your eyes and you didn't quite know why they were so insistent on falling now. 
He continued on. "I was too proud to admit it before. All because you were like me and our families chose us for each other. I've always watched you read in the common room and tried to muster up whatever I needed to ask you to be partners in class, but I was just so focused on going against my family to get close to you. I'm sorry." 
"Again, you don't need to be sorry." You said. You weren't sure that was true, but you had thought the exact same thing about him a few times throughout the years, so you couldn't blame him at all. "I just want to go upstairs, and we can talk more later."
"Okay, let's get you fixed up, then."
He gave you another sweet kiss on the forehead, then he wrapped his arm around you while you walked upstairs together. 
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hiddenmoonbeam · 10 days
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Thinking about teenage Sirius, wickedly smart with top grades, a rich heir to an old pureblood house, tall and handsome and haugty, drawing many admiring and envious looks that he appears to be above acknowledging. Popular, yet sticks to his small and close circle of friends, not really allowing anyone else close.
But even with them he's guarded about his own physical space; the old uncease is hard to shake, and it twists the want into knots. No matter how much he craves this intimicy, he struggles to accept it when it's given, and initiating it himself is even more difficult.
Padfoot makes everything simple, though. And so Sirius starts turning into him whenever he needs to be close - because asking for cuddles is so much easier for the dog than it is for the boy.
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apparentlytheproblem · 2 months
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j e a l o u s y
fandom- Harry Potter
pairing(s)- sirius black
a/n: im so sorry it took so long, my questions are flooded and im trying my best but regardless my requests are open luvs :)
so this is actually kind of based on a boy i liked (like) and i can't say its been as happy as this but that's where i found a bit of my inspiration for this and its honestly eh
requested- yes
warnings- there is a bit of insecurities and doubt showing, mature themes, jealousy (if that wasn't obvious), it could be seen as toxic, mention of a vagina
siri's masterlist . navigation
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Sirius absolutley loathed Bertram Aubrey with every being in his body. His name itself was a bad omen, it was as if conjuring the evil spirits if anyone dared to acknowledge his presence anywhere near Black.
It's always, Aubrey is a liar, Aubrey is a cheat, Aubrey has no backbone, but Sirius would never admit why he targeted him so much without a second glance. his feud all led down to the same road
Bertram fancied the girl he's been pinning on for over two years and what has become of him when he was so easily placed at the smae level as him? he's never had a problem with winning people over with his charisma.
So when he saw Aubrey anywhere near you, a cold sweat ran down his back. he had nothing to be afraid of. he knew you would never chose him, he could never be Sirius fuckin Black.
but why was there a burning sensation when his hands brushed yours, when you smiled back at him? it made the gryffindor see absolute red.
you were pulled into a broom closet in the middle of a an abandoned and dusty hallway by a familiar hand with familiar rings.
only a dim light entered the wooden box, enough to see an annoyed and arrogant face.
"Why are you so worked up?"
his right hand slid up your waist bringing you impossibly close to him while the other rested under your arse. he lightly nudged you to lean and place your support on the wooden surface as he observed your words.
"Because I can't stand the sight of him near you," Sirius whispered, his voice low and dangerous. hot.
His grip tightened on your waist, pulling you even closer to him. do you know when you feel butterflies in your stomach? you felt it in your pussy instead. she was aching. god.
You could feel the tension radiating off him, his body pressed against yours in the confined space of the closet. His eyes bore into yours, searching for any sign of betrayal.
"But he's just a friend," you protested weakly, trying to lightly push against his chest to create some distance between you, but Sirius wouldn't budge.
"friend huh?" he scoffed, his tone dripping with disbelief. "He wants more than that, and you know it. I've seen the way he looks at you. Its how I look at you."
You swallowed nervously, feeling the weight of Sirius's accusations. There was a part of you that wanted to deny it, to reassure him that Bertram meant nothing to you. But another part, a small and treacherous part, couldn't deny the thrill of attention from someone like Bertram.
Sirius seemed to sense your internal struggle, his grip softening slightly as he searched your face for answers. "Do you wanna fuck him huh?" he asked, almost hesitantly, as if afraid of the answer.
You opened your mouth to respond, but the words caught in your throat. How could you admit to Sirius, to yourself, the conflicting emotions swirling inside you?
Before you could form a coherent response, Sirius leaned in closer, his lips dangerously close to yours. "tell me baby," he murmured, his breath hot against your skin, "who do dream of?"
His words hung in the air between you, heavy with unspoken implications. And in that moment, with Sirius so close you could feel the heat of his body, you realized that the answer didn't matter.
All that mattered was the pull between you, the undeniable magnetism that drew you together despite everything else.
You reached up, tangling your fingers in Sirius's hair as you pulled him closer, closing the gap between you in a desperate kiss that left no room for doubt.
The kiss deepened, igniting a fire that had been simmering between you for far too long. Sirius's hands roamed over your body, leaving a trail of heat in their wake as he pulled you impossibly closer.
Time seemed to stand still as you lost yourself in each other, the world outside the closet fading away until there was nothing but the two of you.
Eventually, the need for air forced you to break the kiss, but you remained pressed against each other, chests rising and falling in unison as you tried to catch your breath.
"You. Only you." you whispered, your voice barely more than a breathless exhale.
But Sirius shook his head, a small smile playing at the corners of his lips. "That's what I thought" he said softly, brushing a strand of hair away from your face.
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ur-local-anti-hero · 17 days
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Sparks fly
Sirius Black x Pureblood slytherin!Reader
Summary: Dating a Black was not the problem, the problem was that is Sirius, a known bloodtraitor.
Genre: Hurt/comfort and secret relationship
CW: talks about familiar problems, blood status and arranged marriages
Word count: 1.2K
This is part of my Speak Now (Marauders’ version) collection 
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“I run my fingers through your hair and watch the lights go wild. Just keep on keeping your eyes on me, it's just wrong enough to make it feel right”
Sunny days were not common in Hogwarts, the usually humid weather of the Scottish highland made it hard for students to enjoy the large grounds surrounding the school. 
Nonetheless, whenever the clouds weren’t pouring rain or blocking the sun you have been finding yourself in the same place for the last year.  
You were sitting by the black lake, in a remote spot seldom crowded by students. It was at times like this that you felt genuinely happy, the sun illuminating the lake and the weather hot enough for you to discard your coat. Though you could argue the cozy spring weather was not the main source for your happiness, but the man whose head was resting on your lap, your fingers running through his beautiful dark hair. 
You never meant to fall for him, really. He was hotheaded, a pain in the ass, arrogant, a womanizer and everything your parents would hate for you -which was anything but a respected pureblood heir-. Falling for a Black was not the problem, the Black family was a well bred pureblood family, all of them except your boyfriend. Falling for a Black was not the problem, falling for Sirius was. 
You both were aware of the implications of the relationship so you did what was the most logical thing, kept it a secret to everyone. At first the secrecy wasn’t that bad, it was even thrilling at points, sneaking out and stolen glances had been fun for a while. Until it wasn’t enough, you wanted to be able to hold his hand in public, or display a little bit more of PDA than appropriate when girls were shamelessly hitting on him. 
But if your friends were to find out about your relationship with Sirius it wouldn’t end well, they’d be against it, probably stop talking to you and tell your parents, which would end with you getting disowned or betrothed to one of your cousins to keep the family name clean. And if his friends found out he’d probably be mocked relentlessly for dating what he swore to hate, and maybe his friends would be sceptical of you, or just disapprove entirely of you. 
“A penny for your thoughts?” Sirius's voice broke your train of thought and your eyes fell on him. 
He looked beautiful, his head resting in your lap and your hands on his hair. His gorgeous grey eyes were filled with concern when he looked at you. 
"Sometimes I wonder if this is all worth it, you know, the hiding. Don't you get tired of it?" You asked him, your tone making your boyfriend realize just how serious you were. 
Sirius sat upright to be able to look you in the eyes, his thigh touching yours and his hand on top of yours, stroking it lovingly. 
“You know I love you right? It doesn’t matter what others think of this, of us.” He said, his free hand gesturing between you two. “I will love you regardless.” 
“I know, I love you too, so much.”  you whispered while resting your head on his shoulder, Sirius placed a kiss on your temple. And just like that every single worry you had dissipated. 
Oblivious for both of you, another group of students had decided to explore the less visited parts of the school grounds, therefore being aware of the whole exchange. 
───✥───
 “You are joking right?” James asked, dumbfounded at the news that had just left Remus’ mouth. 
“I couldn’t believe it either, apparently Barty and Snape saw them together on the school grounds.” came Remus’ reply. 
James and Peter were hanging out in the common room when Remus delivered them the new hearsay that was going on around Hogwarts. As if on cue Sirius appeared in their peripheral vision, skipping down the stairs with a happy whistle and making his way towards them. 
When he saw their shocked faces looking up at him he stopped dead in his tracks. “What?” he inquired. 
James started on an incomprensible ramble along the words of ‘how, when, why…’ just to be interrupted by Peter. “Are you really dating Y/N? like, the pureblood slytherin Y/N?” 
“How do you…?” Sirius' mind was racing, unable to process a single thought, how did they know? Who else knew? Where were you? 
“I ran into Lily and Marlene, and they told me that Barty and Snape had seen you two on a date. Everybody knows, rumors fly at hogwarts” Remus explained. 
Sirius' worry grew, if everybody knew, that meant your house knew. And if they did it was only a matter of time until your parents got the news. The interrogation that he was going to suffer at the hands of his friends was nothing compared to the reactions you’d get from everyone in Slytherin. 
“I need to find her, I’m sorry. I’ll explain everything later, I promise.” Sirius ran from the room, leaving behind three very confused marauders and James shouting “So it’s true?!” 
───✥───
He found you outside. The former gentle weather was now replaced with heavy rain. 
You were sitting in the same spot of your dates. Sirius heard your sobs before he saw you. 
You were drenched by the rain, your hair sticking to your face, your eyes red and swollen from crying. 
“Y/N” he spoke softly when he reached your side, his arms pulling you into a hug. “It’s okay, baby.” That made you cry harder and your arms to tighten around him. 
“They know Sirius, I can’t go back to the common room, they are going to have my head.” You said in between sobs. As soon as the news had reached the slytherin common room so had the threats, namecalling and hexes. “I’m sure Evan has already sent an owl to my parents, I’m going to get disowned, Siri. I don’t have anywhere to go.” 
Sirius could feel your pain through your words, when shit had hit the fan at his home he had the Marauders to have his back. You didn’t have anyone except for him. 
“You can sleep in my dorm tonight, don’t go back to yours.” he said while soothing your back.
“Do your friends know?” he nodded. “They hate me, I can’t go to your dorm.” you said, trying to hide your face in his chest. 
“Hey, none of that. They don’t hate you, they’ll be surprised, maybe a little bit apprehensive about the whole thing, but they’ll give you a chance, and they are going to love you.” Sirius' voice was assertive, he was trying to reduce your self deprecating thoughts at a minimum. 
“What about my parents?” you said, more calmed now, sobs turned into hiccups. 
“We are going to figure it out, you and I, together. We’ll find a way.” Sirius' hand came in touch with your face as he tried to dry your tears.
“Okay, yeah you are right. I love you Sirius.” 
“I love you too, forever.” 
Sirius leaned in for a kiss, soft and filled with love. You wondered then how wrong this was when it just felt so right.
Author's note: Thank you for reading! Likes, comments and reblogs are welcomed and very appreciated To be part of the taglist Dm me or send me an ask <3 Series' taglist: @feral-posts @izuoyarmin @aremuslupinsim @yourfavgay
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daenysx · 13 days
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hi love <3
first off i wanted to say that i find myself lurking in your blog way too much than I should (i mean i have a life and i cant spend all day reading your fics, OR CAN I?) and i love how you write and hejsusjsjsj you just make my day, so i hope you’re having a wonderful day gorgeous💗
second of all, can i please request either a poly marauders or a sirius (or James whichever you think fits the story better) x fem reader where her birthday passed and just no one seemed to really care except for the boys? Some of her friends forgot and some others gave a half hearted birthday wish and she just feels sort of unloved? and just lots of hurt/comfort/cuddles/fluff hehe thanks
if u cant tell, im projecting🤧 my birthday was on the 9th and lets just say it was not that important of a deal for most people :)
you are the sweetest angel, my love, happy late birthday!! i'm really sorry, you deserved the best birthday and i hope you can accept this little fic as your birthday gift!! ♡
it's my first time writing for poly!marauders, please share your thoughts with me!!
poly!marauders x fem!reader, fluff + a little hurt/comfort
your cheeks ache from giving smiles to your boys all day.
it wasn't an eventful birthday for you, but it was so so nice. you woke up to kisses from james, his whispers of sweet nothings as remus came back to your side from kitchen. sirius's hair was wet from the shower he took as he does every morning, you and james watched how remus took care of his curls from bed. you spent more than an hour just staying in bed, feeling more loved than ever with their words and kisses.
when remus finally convinced you to leave the bed, james offered to carry you in his arms all the way to kitchen. "anything for my birthday girl." he said, your lovely boy. sirius kissed your lips as he handed you a cup of coffee, pancakes and fruits were just like you enjoy. a perfect birthday breakfast, you laughed at every joke sirius made, accepted every forehead kiss from james. remus was giving you heart eyes, you blushed from the attention you got. he gave you an easy smile and you blew him a kiss.
the boys had plenty of offers for your birthday celebration but you decided to stay at home. you wanted a quiet day with them, just being lazy and careless. thinking about wishes and dreams about your new age. you liked how easy it was to do as you wanted with them, no explanations or excuses needed.
you could hear the whispers coming from kitchen when james got you comfy on his chest, cuddling on the couch. he kissed your hair, your arms tightened around his body. legs tangled, fingers curled up on his shirt.
you checked your phone, the screen was bright, showing there's a birthday message from lily. you smiled, replied her long text. there were other texts from a few of your friends. well, technically they were birthday messages but- none of them felt like they actually wished you the happiest birthday. why would people text like celebrating someone's birthday is a chore? you frowned, couldn't accept the fact that you were in fact, waiting for something better. didn't you deserve it?
james noticed how your smile fell, he could see the texts on the screen. "happy birthday, love u." that girl was supposed to be one of your closest friends. you really were expecting something more- heartfelt? you always tried to make sure people you like know how much they are liked by you, texted the sweetest messages to them, cared about their birthdays more than yours. it didn't feel fair. still, you didn't want to jump into conclusions and ruin your day. you let go of your phone to wrap your arms around james.
he held you gently, kissing you again. "anything wrong?" he whispered. you shook your head. it was nothing important. he nodded, giving you a little time to collect your thoughts.
"angel." he said, "there's something here you may want to see."
you looked up, saw your boyfriends holding a birthday cake for you. it was beautiful, covered in silver colored candles. remus held the cake for you to see better as you sat up, the candles were definitely sirius's choice. you forgot about the texts, seeing them smile at you like you were the most precious thing in the whole world was making your head dizzy with affection.
you blew the candles, making a wish. james's fingers were drawing circles on your arm. you kissed your boyfriends thank you, a slow but happy tear rolled on your cheek. "come on, sweetheart, there's nothing to cry about. you're still young." sirius said, winking. his lips were curved into a playful smile.
"let's eat the cake." you said. "god, it looks so good."
"you remember remus's friend who owns a bakery? we got the cake from his shop." james said.
"who, charles?" you asked, remembering details about charles for a second. "i always see the cakes he makes on instagram, he's really good."
"first slice for the birthday girl." remus said, giving you your cake. "happy birthday, sweetheart. we love you so much."
"i love you so much." you said before taking a bite. "it's delicious. thank you."
sirius ate his own slice in three seconds. "this is better than i expected. another slice, please moony."
you kissed his chocolate covered lips fondly. hours were spent on eating cake, gossipping about sirius's workplace, drinking tea, and changing into different cuddling positions. your phone was silent, no one called. there were no other texts. it's weird, you thought. even the people who celebrated their birthdays with you didn't bother to give you a small text.
the day is almost finished, you are full with cake and sweets. james insists on doubling up the princess treatment he gives you every day and helps you with your skincare. you are sitting on bed as his fingers apply your night cream on your achy cheeks, sirius and remus brush their teeth at the bathroom after you and james leave for bed. your hand reaches to your phone. nothing.
"i think," james starts. "it's time you should tell me what's been on your mind all day."
you shrug. what can you tell? expecting birthday wishes from people feels weird. maybe they forgot. maybe they didn't care enough. should you remind them it's your birthday? no, that's stupid. is it? you don't know.
"what's upsetting my baby on her birthday?" he says. "tell me."
"there's something upsetting our baby?" sirius steps in after remus. "what happened?"
you give them a smile that says you're okay. "nothing." you start. remus's eyes find yours, worry sparks in them. "it's just- the girls and my friends from work- some of them forgot about my birthday, and other messages were a bit weird."
"i'm sorry." remus says, holding your hand. "i'm really sorry about that, angel."
"it's okay." you say. "i mean, no one has to remember."
"um, yeah, they kinda have to at some point." sirius says. "you do your best to remember things about your friends and you have every right to expect the same from them."
"i know." you say. you know, but what can you do?
james leans in to kiss your cheek. "i know it's terrible. you don't deserve it. i think- it's not your fault, yeah? you didn't do anything wrong. you deserve the best."
he says the last part silently like he's sad and it breaks your heart. they tried to make your day perfect, they don't deserve to end it sad. you don't deserve to sleep upset on your birthday. you look into james's eyes. "i already have the best." you say. "have you seen our boyfriends?"
you are being sweet on him. "have you seen yourself?" you say, pulling his face to kiss him. he smiles into the kiss. "i'm okay, really." you say.
"of course you are." sirius says. "in what world the birthday girl goes to bed upset?"
remus brushes a kiss on sirius's curls. they are lovely, sitting up in bed to comfort you the best they can. you need a bit time, you think. it's a hard thing to carry, feeling like you are not loved by some people you care about. it's not fair to the boys though. you are so incredibly loved by them and you feel it in your every breath. you can think about the others later. for now, you only need to show your love to your boys. the three people who deserve it the most.
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ellecdc · 2 months
Note
Can i request something bit angsty? 🥺 its totally fine if you dont wanna write it tho!
I was thinking, wolfstar x reader got into an argument and reader started to occlude and the boys got scared they might be out of line bcs she only occlude when shes really hurting?
this is my SHIT - love me some hurt/comfort. thanks for requesting, lovie 🫶
poly!wolfstar x fem!readerCW: hurt/comfort, arguing, mention of past family discourse, toxic family memories
“I’m sorry. You did what?” Sirius beseeched, walking into the living room from the kitchen and interrupting the points (arguments) you and Remus were each in the process of making. You gave him an unimpressed look, knowing he wasn’t actually asking you to repeat yourself, he just couldn’t believe what he had heard.
“She gave Mary-Ella over a grand.” Remus muttered bitterly.
“I did not give Mary-Ella money, I loaned her money.” You were quick to correct.
Sirius just scoffed. “Sure you did, dollface.” He sneered, making his usual pet-name burn to the touch. “You are never going to see that money again.”
“What were you thinking?” Remus implored.
“I was thinking that my friend was in a bind and needed help. I hardly think that’s a crime.” 
“You didn’t just loan a little bit of money, though. You loaned a lot of money to a friend who is not reliable in the slightest.” Remus asserted.
“We have been working so hard trying to save up to move. To move closer to Diagon Alley so that Remus can be closer to work, and we can finally get out of my uncles flat.” Sirius added.
“I know we’ve been working hard, Sirius. I know this because I too have been working hard. But I’m not going to watch my friend struggle when there’s something I could do to help!”
“This choice impacted all of us. You had no right to make this decision on your own.”
It was your turn to scoff as you turned to glare at Remus incredulously. You had been trying to stay patient, knowing that this close to the moon, Remus was feeling extra sensitive. But him ganging-up on you with Sirius quickly found what little patience you had running thin. “I 'had no right' to make a decision about money that I made on my own?”
“You have no ground to stand on, buttercup. You’re now out more than a grand because of this choice; we’re all out more than a grand because of your choice.” Sirius growled, tone full of derision.
“If the roles were reversed, Mary-Ella would help me out!” You tried to reason, only for Remus to bark a laugh.
“That doesn’t even matter, dove. Because you’d never be in her position and likewise, she’d never be in yours. She’s irresponsible, unreliable, and a mooch.”
You tried to ignore the burning sensation in your sinuses as you spoke to the back of Remus’ head; he apparently had grown so disgusted with you that he couldn’t even look at you anymore. 
“I don’t like you talking about my friends like that. I don’t understand why we’re making such a big deal about this, I jus-” but you were cut off as Remus stood abruptly and turned on you. 
“We’re making this a big deal because it is a big deal!” he bellowed. “You leave this apartment in the morning and it’s like Sirius and I don’t exist anymore. You conduct yourself like some single woman with no responsibility to anyone else but herself.”
“You’re being selfish. You can’t possibly expect to drop a bomb on us like this and, what, expect us to just reply with ‘yes dear’? You fucked up, Y/N.” Sirius added, arms crossed defensively over his chest and cold silver eyes glared daggers that permeated your entire being. Remus carried on, unperturbed by the effects this conversation was having on you.
You felt like you were seventeen again, like you were eleven, nine, six. You felt like a babe whose hand had been slapped for reasons beyond your comprehension.
Do you ever stop and think about the consequences, Y/N?
You were sitting at the dining room table as your father lashed you with his words, each sentence punctuated with the slamming of his fists on the table. You were standing on the platform having just reunited with your parents after the school year as your mother’s claws dug into your arms, warning you that punishment was to come later if you didn’t smarten up. You were cowering in the backyard as your father screamed at you in front of the entire neighbourhood – a free show for all to enjoy. 
You think crying will earn you any sympathy here? You’re a manipulative little witch if you think that will work on me. Keep crying and I’ll give you something to cry about. 
You felt naked – like your figurative clothes had been violently ripped from your body – and there you stood, stripped bare for all to leer at. Standing before two people...who were meant to love you unconditionally...as they laced their words with venom and spat vitriol at you.
You couldn’t even hear the point Remus was trying to make anymore. It didn’t matter anyway.
He hated you. You were hated. You were a disappointment, a burden, unwanted.
But you couldn’t cry – could never cry. You’d just be manipulating them. You were deceitful. Emotions were deceitful. The way you felt was wrong. And they were right.
Always right. 
So, you did what you always did; you made it quiet. 
You began layering rows of stones around your being. Protection. Space. Distance. Safety.
They couldn’t hurt you from all the way in here, not from the other side of your wall. You’d be safe here. Here in the quiet.
It was safe in the quiet. 
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Sirius felt disgraceful at how long it took him to notice the signs of you pulling away from the conversation. Away from them. Away from him.
Remus – always more sensitive than the two of you when it came to the likes of money, combined with feeling extra flustered with the upcoming full moon – had no reason to expect nor recognize signs of occlusion. 
Suddenly, Sirius was fourteen again. Walburga was standing over him with her wand aimed at his chest, but all he could see was Regulus. He had prayed at the time that his brother could hear him begging in his mind:
Turn it off, Reg. Just turn it off. It can’t hurt you if you turn it off. 
Sirius himself sat in an almost constant state of occlusion during his fifth year, knowing somewhere deep in his gut that the beginning of the end of his life as the heir of the Ancient and Most Noble House of Black (or the end of his life in general) was near. 
Growing up wasn’t a whole lot easier for you, it seemed. And he knew that when things got to be too much, you did what you needed to do to protect yourself.
He suddenly hated himself. You weren’t supposed to need to protect yourself from him and Remus. It was their job to protect you; just like you always protected them. 
How you protected Remus from wasting away on the days leading up to and recovering from the full moon. You never let him go hungry or thirsty, you always made sure the space was clean and tidy, and you never let him fall into his typical pre- and post-moon self-loathing.
And you protected Sirius from himself; from saying things that he wouldn’t be able to take back, from being the worst version of himself, from losing you and Remus completely. 
He didn’t deserve you.
You didn’t deserve this.
For fuck’s sake all you had been doing was being kind.
Being a good friend, someone that others could rely on, protecting people who meant so much to you. 
All you were doing was being your kind, courteous, protective, generous self that Remus and Sirius had fallen in love with from the very start.
“Moony!” Sirius pleaded, causing the lycanthrope to pause in his tangent. You didn’t even flinch at the sudden change in the atmosphere as Remus looked at Sirius bewilderedly. 
“We’ve lost her.” Sirius murmured quietly, causing Remus to spin to observe you. 
“Well...” Remus began, still struggling to shake off his anger and the need to argue. “But I-”
“It’s enough, Remus.” Sirius hissed quietly, staring at Remus with a look he hoped conveyed no nonsense.
He apparently succeeded as Remus let out whatever breath he’d been holding as he turned again to face you.
“Dove, I’m sorry.” Remus whispered as he tried to move towards you, but you instinctively took a step back to maintain the distance between you; your arms wrapped around your middle protectively as if that was all that was holding you together. 
Sirius’ heart felt like it split in two – and based off of the look on Remus’ face, he wasn’t fairing any better.
“Y/N?” Sirius tried. You didn’t turn to look at him, but you hummed in quasi-acknowledgement.
“Can you look at me?” He tried quietly, but you shook your head no. 
Remus made a pained sound as he tried to move towards you again, ducking his head down in an attempt to make eye contact with you. You didn’t back away from him this time, but your arms tightened in their hold around your middle.
“Sweetheart, I’m sorry I...I shouldn’t have spoken to you like that. I’m...I was out of line.”
“Come back?” Sirius pleaded. “Please.”
You took a deep breath and turned your face towards your boyfriends, but Sirius could tell your eyes were still foggy – you were still hiding.
“We won’t talk about it anymore. That conversation is done.” Sirius said.
“But-” you started, voice grating from the tightness in your throat, but he cut you off.
“The conversation is done. You did what you thought was right, you were being your kind lovely self, helping your friend when they needed you. We shouldn’t have yelled at you, sweets. I’m sorry.”
Remus made another pained sound and moved closer to you again.
“Dovey, I’m so sorry. Please, can I- would you like a hug?”
Sirius watched as you looked at Remus, seeming to weigh your options before you nodded once at him. Remus needn’t any more invitation and quickly (though gently) made for you, enveloping you in his arms. 
The three of you stayed like that – Remus with his arms around you, you with your arms around yourself and your face pushed into his chest, and Sirius standing helplessly at the side – before Sirius started to notice some tension leaving your shoulders.
“Why’d you go?” He asked you quietly, gently placing a hand in the middle of your shoulder blades and rubbing in a way he hoped was soothing.
“I didn’t want to cry.” You admitted into Remus’ chest, neither boy missing how tight your voice seemed to be, even as your voice barely raised above a whisper. 
“Oh, dolly. Just cry. Cry, okay? Make us feel like tossers, but don’t leave.” Sirius said.
“I didn’t want you to feel bad.” You muttered wetly, finally turning so Sirius could see your red and wet face. 
“But we deserved it. Oh, my love.” Remus cooed as he all but picked you up and locked your legs around his hips, forcing you to move your grip from around yourself to around him.
“I’m not s’posed to make you cry. I’m s’posed to make you smile.” He muttered pitifully, pressing his lips into your hair.
“And cum.” Sirius spoke in the same pitiful tone, brushing a strand of hair from your forehead.
You laughed wetly and the last of your occlusion appeared to slip away which was what Sirius had been aiming for. It didn’t make him feel all that much better though.
“Oh, my girl. I’m so sorry, Pads is right. You were just being your lovely self, and I’m a bastard.”
Sirius watched as your brows furrowed. “You’re not a bastard.”
“No,” Sirius agreed readily, “he was just being a bastard. Both of us were. Do you think you can forgive us?”
You nodded quickly but Remus tsked in response.
“Don’t let us off so easily, dovey. Make us pay for it. What do you need? Do you need a foot rub? You want cake? Ice cream? What about a kitten? You’ve always wanted a kitten.”
You had been shaking your head at everything Remus said until the last one, your curiosity obviously piqued.
Fuckin’ hells, Sirius thought, if she gets a kitten everytime one of us acts like an arse, we’re going to be overrun with cats by next month. 
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moonstruckme · 1 month
Note
Hi! I would die for a poly!marauders x reader where reader gets a bloody nose and almost passes out. This has happened to me and I wish I had the boys 😅 of course only if this sounds interesting!! 🫶🏼
Thanks for requesting love!
cw: blood, near fainting
poly!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 642 words
You’re mid-story when Remus’ expression shifts. 
“And he didn’t even…ask…” You trail off as James’ eyes flare suddenly. Remus is scanning the room like he’s searching for something. “...what?” 
“I’m just looking for the tissues…” 
You feel your expression crease.
“Don’t worry,” says Sirius, in a no-nonsense tone you don’t hear often. “Just pinch your nose shut and close your eyes, okay?” 
“What…” You touch your fingertips to your nose, and the second the bright red pads come into your view you’re overcome by a wave of nausea. 
“Don’t, don’t.” James takes your hand, bloody fingers and all, hiding them away. Your head fills with cotton. Remus gets up and goes into the kitchen. “Baby, that’s what we’re trying to keep from happening.” 
The feel of something splattering on your thigh has you looking down on instinct. You barely process the bead of blood curving down your thigh before your vision starts to blacken. 
“Okay.” A hand cups the back of your head, cold fingers pressing into your scalp as it takes your weight, and another pinches your nostrils. “None of that, doll, c’mon. You’re okay.” 
You blink a couple of times before the fuzzy darkness clears enough for you to see Sirius in front of you. He’s the picture of calm, while James’ eyes are magnified cartoonishly wide by his glasses. It takes you a second to figure out you need to breathe through your mouth. 
Sirius nods as you inhale. “Good,” he says. “Just keep your eyes on me, doll.”
“You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” James quips, and Sirius’ lips quirk but he doesn’t take his eyes from yours. 
“It’s a happy consequence.” 
“Sorry,” you say, voice sounding whiny all stuffed up. 
“You’re good,” James reassures you. “Rem’s gonna get you cleaned up in just a second. It seems we’ve misplaced the tissues.” 
“Found them!” Remus announces from down the hall. “Who put them under the bed?” 
You and Sirius look to James. He shrugs, sheepish. “That’s my bad,” he admits. “My allergies were bothering me, and I didn’t feel like getting up.” 
“Hoarder,” Sirius accuses fondly, letting go of your nose briefly to allow Remus to swipe at the skin beneath it. 
“Close your eyes,” Remus warns softly, and this time you listen before you can see the tissue. You feel him blot at your nostrils and then wipe up the blood on your hand and leg, keeping your eyes squeezed shut tight. “Good girl.” The lid of the trash bin clangs shut. “You can open now.” 
You replace Sirius’ hand with your own, and he gives you a cautious look as he lets go slowly. “You sure you’ve got it?” He raises an eyebrow at you. “I don’t mind.” 
You smile at him, closed-lipped and trying not to think about what you’re staunching. “I’m good, thanks.” 
Remus sits back down with a heavy sigh. James nods his agreement heartily. 
“Since when do you get nosebleeds?” he asks you. 
“Since now, I guess,” you say. “It’s not my new favorite thing.” 
You’ve always fainted at the sight of blood, so spontaneous bleeding is probably one of the top ten worst things that can happen to you. 
“It’s a bit worrisome,” Remus agrees. “What happens if you’re driving and your nose starts bleeding again? You can’t very well pass out behind the wheel.” 
You level him with a deadpan look. “I’ll try to refrain.” 
“It won’t happen again,” Sirius says surely. He’s eyeing you in a peculiar way, somehow both assessing and decided at once. “We’ll figure out what caused it, and make sure it doesn’t.” 
You look to Remus for an eye roll, but both of your boyfriends look about as trusting in this plan as Sirius. 
“How?” you ask. 
He gives you an indulgent smile. “Don’t worry about it, baby. We’re not gonna let anything happen to you.”
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bettysupremacy · 7 months
Note
to shake things up a little, what about remus, sirius, or james with a s/o who's [ somehow ] more outgoing and boisterous than them? and she's always flaunting their relationship, her adorable boyfriend, and says the most genuine compliments out of nowhere both to him and other people and it's got him all shy and blushy such
This is such a cute idea!!!! I chose Sirius cause I felt like it in the moment, but this is such a cute idea for all of them. I hope you like it!!<3
“And he-“ You stumble, pausing at the mop of black hair in front of you. “Oh! Siri!”
He laughs at your state, flicking hair away. “That’s me.”
“I was just telling them,” You turn to the girls you met in the kitchen. They wave. “About you.”
“Only good things I hope.”
“Terrible.” You frown, pulling the cherry from the bottom of your empty cup to drop it in Sirius’s. He has two cherries now. Your fingers are wet, and sticky, and Sirius brings your knuckles to his lips to kiss the mixture away. You flush, alcohol and love warming you. “He’s so sweet.”
“Didn’t work very well.” He frowns. “You’re still sticky.”
“I don’t mind.” You laugh.
“I do,” He looks around for the nearest washroom. “Those sticky fingers aren’t going anywhere near my hair.”
You huff, watching him tap is fingers on the island countertop. They click lightly, the gloss of his black nail polish shining in the twinkling candles in every corner. The girls get up and leave, waving at you brilliantly. You grin, waving back just as hard.
“I think there’s one-“ He pauses.
“What’re you looking for?” James pops up, glasses a little crooked. He smiles when you reach up to straighten them. “Thank you, dove.” He nods.
You laugh, turning to Sirius. His eyes still search for a washroom, but his hands found their way to your hip, and the fingers molding into your skin distract you.
“You alright, my love?” Mary giggles.
Lily steps in front of you, holding your face in her slender fingers. You smile at the freckles on her nose, drawn messily like little constellations
“You’re my best friends.” You grin.
“Your friends?” Sirius gawps.
“Yes, padfoot.” Remus nods seriously. “We’re her friends.”
The room is light, love floating around airily. Lily presses a kiss to your cheek. “How much have you had to drink?”
“Just enough.”
“Perfect.” She murmurs, pulling away to reside in Mary’s arms. Her lipstick stains your cheek softly.
You turn to Sirius. Your fingers are still sticky to his dismay, but he doesn’t complain when they tangle in his hoodie. “You are so pretty, Siri, I’m serious! Isn’t he so pretty?”
“It’s the eyes.” James gushes for your amusement.
You nod enthusiastically. “I know!”
Sirius startles. “You need toast.”
“I need a kiss.” You tip toe in the flats you put on in the dim sunlight of your apartment before you left. “Please.”
He sighs, worried sick for your head in the morning. Aspirin can only do so much. “Honey-“
“He is not this shy at home.” You supply your friends. “Normally he-“
“Woah!” Sirius laughs, covering your mouth with his large palm. “You need a burger. We’re leaving.”
“What!” You gasp. “I don’t want to leave.”
“We’ll miss you.” Marls frowns sympathetically, leaning into Dorcas.
“I’ll miss you too.” You sigh. “And your skirt is so pretty.”
Dorcas grins. “You like it?”
“I love it.” Pulling away from Sirius, each of your friends are graced with a goodbye hug. One by one. “I love you.”
“Go eat.” Remus laughs.
“Siri doesn’t le-“
“And thats enough!” He laughs loudly, covering your sentence. “We’re leaving now.”
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writtenbymoonflower · 3 months
Note
Hi omg I just discovered you’re fics and girl 🥰🥰 I love them so I wanted to put in a request could you do a poly!marauders fic where reader has anxiety buts hates taking her medication, thanks!!
thanks for reading and requesting hunny! I hope this is okay. fem!reader x poly!marauders
cw: anxiety, medication, swearing
905 words
You weighed the bottle in your hand, hearing the tablets rattle. You debated your options. It was a safe bet to take them, but they made you feel flighty and drowsy. If you didn’t take them it could end badly, but nothing you weren’t used to. You had been stressed lately, but you could manage. You would regret taking them if nothing happened and you would regret not taking them if something did. Damned if you do, damned if you don’t. You decided against it for the time being, closing the medicine cabinet and walking into your shared bedroom. 
Sirius was rummaging through his part of the closet, holding various pieces up to his body, while Remus occasionally looked up from his novel to give an indifferent shrug or an approving smirk. James was looking at Sirius with googly eyes while he folded the clothes he was haphazardly tossing. 
“See, I think this one makes- hey, gorgeous! -I think it makes my waist pop. What do you think?” He held the piece to his torso, showing off the top. 
“Can’t tell if you don’t put it on.” Remus said, nonchalant. 
“If you want a strip tease Moons, just say so.” Sirius winked, tossing the shirt into his ‘keep’ pile. You shuffled over to James, sitting next to him and leaning on his bicep as he kissed the top of your head and wrapped an arm around your shoulders. 
“You should do this soon, lovie.” James suggested.
“Yeah! You were just saying you needed to go through your clothes the other day. Might as well give us the pleasure of a fashion show in the process.” Sirius smirked at you. 
“Like I said, it’s only a fashion show if you actually wear clothes.” Remus said again. Sirius just rolled his eyes, going back to his closet rummaging. 
You really did need to clean your part of the closet. You also needed to fill out some paperwork, and do some cleaning, and go through your makeup. Honestly, you had a laundry list of things you needed to get done that you were slowly working through. Slow as in, snail’s pace. An anxious jolt went through your body as you thought about it, making chills spread over your skin and your hands feel fidgety. You tried to take some deep breaths, but they just ended up shaky as you began to pick your cuticles. You could feel James studying the top of your head, and it made you more uneasy. You were running the risk of shredding your nails, squeezing your eyes tightly as if it would keep the anxiety out. 
“You okay, baby dove?” Remus spoke up, setting his book down. This caught Sirius’ attention. Unfortunately, Remus’ words did not comfort you, but rather flustered you further. 
“Y-yeah.” You struggled out, breathing becoming more shallow. 
“What’s going on, sweet girl?” James questioned, backing up to look at your face. 
“I- I think I’m just anxious.” You shook, still picking at your nails. You bit hard on your lip thinking it would help. It didn’t. Sirius dropped the trousers he was holding and hurried over. 
“Shit, baby. Don’t hurt yourself, it’s okay.” He took your offending hands in one of his larger ones and freed your lip from its abuse with the other. They were used to this with you, which you regretted. James was petting your head gently. You could hear the skepticism in Remus’ voice.
“Did you take your medicine today, lovely?” His amber eyes searched your worried face. You just looked down, shaking your head. 
Sirius was exasperated. “Baby,” He chided. “We’ve talked about this.” He said as Remus sighed and stood up to fetch your pill bottle. 
“I know,” You said, shamefully. Sirius decided not to scold you worse in your fragile state. 
“Here, drink this.” James handed you his water bottle, opening it for you. You drank up, the cool liquid helping your state. Remus returned with your medication, watching you intensely as you took the dose. When you swallowed, Remus took your chin in his hand, lifting your face to look at him. 
“I know you have a hard time with this, but you’ve gotta look after yourself. It’s worse when you don’t, sweet girl." He was gentle but desperate as he pressed a chaste kiss to your forehead. You nodded, hiding in James' chest. He was graceful, and gently rocked you, hoping to calm your nervous system. Sirius grabbed one of your hands again, lifting it to kiss each of your knuckles. 
“You feeling better, baby?” His eyes were unusually round and glossy. 
“Yes, loads better. Thank you guys. I’m sorry I get like this.” 
“Don’t be sorry, sweetness.” James kissed the top of your head again. “Just try to be nicer to yourself. There’s a reason you were given the medication.” 
“I know.” You settled, your breathing finally returning to a normal rate. Sirius looked most relieved, giving in and tackling you onto the bed, making James squawk in protest. 
“Geez Pads, don’t crush the poor thing. She’s fragile.” James relented to stroking Sirius' hair out of his face as the boy grinned on top of you. 
“Shush, Prongs. I’m trying to enjoy this.” He turned his gaze to you. “Besides, I heard pressure helps anxiety.” He put all his weight on you, needling his arms underneath your body to squeeze you against him. 
He was right. It did help.
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