firecracker!yn insta update 🙏

FIRECRACKER!YN INSTA UPDATE ✮☯︎

Construction worker Robin 🥸

Lulu being a complete disaster and I love her for it.

—— nepharia and her morality ( or lack there of ).

being a cambion, nepharia was born with a natural kind of hellish corruption to her moral compass already, and her upbringing was quite the opposite of loving, supportive and directive. her impoverished father despised her the moment she was born, pale and gray, compared to his crimson red complexion. her mother ( also a red skinned tiefling ) died giving birth to nepharia, leaving her under the care of an abusive father who wished she had died instead. neph really had no examples of what empathy, compassion, and love might even look like. i imagine she only became more volatile as she aged, tormenting small animals and insects, pulling dangerous pranks on people, with no regard for the life around her. when she was fifteen, her father sold her to a wealthy man who ran an illegal tiefling brothel tailored to the elite.

being there definitely broke her quick, tamed that feral demon inside of her, mostly because she wanted to survive. she did exactly as she was told for years. other girls would try to befriend her, but she learned quick that friends weren’t safe. you can’t be betrayed if you trust no one. it took a number of years, and a number of girls betrayed by her, before the owner started to give her more authority within the establishment, trusting her to help break other girls, train them, deal out punishments and consequences for misbehaving. nepharia had to harden herself, completely disconnect herself from whatever empathy she still had, in order to do what she needed to do to gain enough trust and authority from within to one day escape.

when she finally escaped after ten years, however, nepharia became the opposite of tame, and the opposite of obedient. she was like an abused, feral, wild animal escaped from captivity and released into the world, uncultured, uncivilized, and completely unhinged. she doesn’t learn she’s a cambion ( more specifically, a succubus ) until right before she escapes the brothel, but all cambions are capable of some form of soul absorption. nepharia absorbs souls through sexual intercourse. she can also sustain herself on some of the essence or life-force of a person without completely draining them of their soul, she can even micro feed off of lust alone. a person’s entire life, or soul, acts as an intense mind and body high for nepharia ( similar to that of a heroic dose of mdma/ecstasy, but way stronger ).

nepharia very much becomes addicted to draining people of their souls, because it distracts from the pain of the trauma she’s endured over the years. she mostly kills men. she fears them, she doesn’t trust them, and after a while, she starts to see herself as superior to them. the more she uses and kills them, the less she sees them as threats, or even people. they are her playthings, toys to be used until she’s bored and then they become her sustenance. if she does end up liking a man, her infatuation with them is far from healthy— her fractured psyche is that of a hormonal teenage girl, but a thousand times deadlier. she will become possessive, and obsessive, and aggressive if the object of her desire decides they might want to leave her.

I think you've got to slow down before you start to blow it, I think you're headed for a breakdown, so be careful not to show it….

You really don't remember, was it something that he said?

Are the voices in your head calling….

Sunset Boulevard is probably my favorite film noir of the 1950’s.

#CommissionsEarned

they’re real and so beautiful and so off putting by god I love them all

She’s the goofiest friend I think I have.

Imagine waking up and finding out a woman you haven’t seen in 9 years is using you for YouTube content

Hang on to your socks. I’m about be gay online.

🥀 Meet Mariya Zoidze

Mariya Zoidze… a woman of many names. And a woman from different universes. That’s right folks! You’re looking at the one and only Valencia! Before she became Valencia.

Mariya is a quick witted woman who loves to keep to herself for various reasons. She is known as the saintess in black, which is a much fitting name as for what happens later on in her book. With the power of pent up rage of years of abuse and with the help of Jezoth, she is able to complete her revenge on her adopted family. Though it did cost her her life, now being labeled a witch.

Well, it more like cost her the last bit of sanity and humanity she was grasping on to for dear life. And it costed her identity as well.

Age: 20 years old

Hair color: Pitch black

Eye color: stormy gray

Andromeda and Sirius Black

I was going to make this short and sweet, but once I started typing I couldn’t stop. so here’s a lengthy read on my (re) newest obsession. about 99% canon complaint. not every good with numbers, me.

my headcanon is that one of the reasons andromeda and sirius got along so well during family functions is that they both loved music. musical geniuses both of them. (maybe sirius picked it up from andromeda who always played the piano/violin whenever she got her hands on one and he started picking up on it too).

i don’t think andy married ted right after hogwarts. she gave birth to tonks at 20 or 21 old. so that give her about six years after hogwarts to secretly get to know ted and muggle london. so sirius and andromeda spent the holidays together when their families celebrated. while i do think she kept ted a secret from everyone, sirius started suspecting something. cause she’d sneak her and sirius out of the family celebration to go see broadway west end musicals.

and she knew her way around muggle london far too well. he cleverly tries getting her to spill the tea but she’s far more clever about it. keeping her muggleborn boyfriend a secret from her nosy sisters and her bigoted parents keep her on her toes. she’s not going to slip up her to nosy thirteen year old cousin so matter how much she likes him.

so anyways, she takes him to a musical and sirius is so suprised. first of all, he’s got so much new musical material to obsess over. secondly, he’s so curious about how muggles are setting everything up. (he’s taken a good look, there’s no charms no transfiguration no magic involved at all). he gets so curious he has to know. so next year at hogwarts, he takes muggle studies to learn more to the detriment of his parents.

no one tells sirius that andromeda left. it happens about two years later when he’s at hogwarts. and it seems to him that everyone found out before he did. he’s getting snide remarks from the pure bloods that run in the same circle as his family. nobody tells him what’s happened. not his mother or his father. not bella (not even to make fun of his close relationship to a blood traitor which is weird because that’s one of her favorite pastimes). not narcissa but she certainly didn’t have a problem writing to regulus and letting him know. and certainly not andy.

the last he’s seen her was the summer before fifth year when they snuck out into muggle London and she confessed to him that bellatrix took the dark mark. and how her parents wanted her to marry a lestrange and take the dark mark too since bella had set the precedent. and all he can think of now is what the final straw was for andy. but he doesn’t know because nobody in the family said anything to him. eventually he seeks out regulus (looong story here because these two cannot have a civil conversation for more than 3 minutes) but eventually regulus takes pity on him and give him the tea. but that’s the last time he’s heard anything about andromeda black. nobody has seen her since. and nobody has heard from her since. not even him, to his sorrow.

when he goes home that summer there’s a surprise awaiting him. he’s expected to take the dark mark now that he’s sixteen years old. again thanks to bella for setting the precedent. he’s obviously refusing. but he doesn’t know where to go. james is pretty angry with him over the prank he pulled on snape. remus avoids him eyes. peter ducks him head every time he sees sirius. the one ally he had was his cousin andy but he doesn’t know how to reach her. he knows that she’s now andromeda tonks but that’s all. it’s so frustrating and heartbreaking.

the night before he’s supposed to be taken to get the dark mark, he leaves. there’s shouting, there’s items being thrown, there’s tears, there’s pleas. but he leaves anyway. he knows him and james are at odds but james would never turn him away. he was his best friend dammit. and he knew deep in heart despite remus and peter choosing james over him, that james was just as miserable without sirius as sirius was without him …

… and he wasn’t wrong. the moment james saw sirius in his foyer, there was nothing but tears and laughter and all was forgiven between the two. and that ended up being one of the best summers they had.

andy didn’t know about sirius leaving and being disowned. she was married to a muggleborn and she knew some members of her family would eventually come after her. so she and ted quietly left the wizarding world. she wanted to reach out to sirius — she truly did — but by the time she and ted settled down and found a safe place to live, she was expecting a baby girl. she had new priorities now.

andy has a lot of regrets about that. she finds out in the obituary that regulus died. she didn’t know about her uncle Alphard leaving gold to sirius and being wiped off the tapestry. she just find his obituary in the daily prophet and is saddened. he was her favorite. he was very funny and always made her laugh. she finds out about sirius in the daily prophet. just as the war ends and she’s finally breathes a sigh of relief that her family is spared, she reaches for the newspaper and sees sirius’s face staring back at her. ted looks over her shoulder to see what caught her attention. he tries consoling her but she just shrugs everything off Iike it means nothing. it’s only when she’s alone that she allows herself to think and cry. she blames herself obviously. if only she reached out to him instead of leaving him to fend for himself without her. if only she hasn’t introduced him to muggle London … now he’s kiIIed 13 of them. he was just like them.

years later, when he escapes azkaban, she’s truly afraid. if he came after her husband, she wouldn’t know what to do. she only finds out the truth after the second war. and she’s truly going through it now.

first that sirius was innocent the whole time and she doubted him. why did she do that? why was she so quick to believe he could have behaved like that?

second that her daughter knew he was innocent and kept it from her!

third that remus lupin sat at her dinning table and lied to her face when he said he didn’t know how sirius died or who kiIIed him.

fourth that regulus regulus was one of the first people who tried to bring the Dark Lord down. while he was a death eater. at seventeen!

fifth that narcissa did the same. narcissa lied to the Dark Lord and saved Harry Potter. narcissa dammit. her selfish, self serving sister did that. she didn’t know how to feel.

sixth that it was bella who kiIIed sirius. sirius who was innocent the whole damn time and was a member of the order of the phoenix. how could have bella done that?

seventh that bella also kiIIed her daughter. her daughter. her sister kiIIed her daughter. and all of this happened while she sat at home safe and sound. she would never forgive herself.

she always was burdened by having Black blood. she always hated it. but the Blacks of her generation did more for both wars than she could have ever imagined. she sat there thinking they were all cowards for not being as brave as her for leaving their bigoted family legacy behind. but every single one of them played a vital part in ending the war. sirius, regulus, and narcissa. hell even her daughter, dora, and her sister’s son, draco. she would never ever forgive herself.

Uh-

just found out my cousin (who lives in England) is in the art department of a bunch of shows??? And she worked oN DOCTOR WHO? AND HAD LUNCH WITH DAVID TENNANT???? and she just told me so casually because she's interested in the art, not the show? I mean, excuse me? She worked on SHERLOCK???? FOR A WHOLE SEASON?? She worked on Peaky Blinders and Lord of the Rings and Game of Thrones??? And probably other things because she has a shitty memory and according to her everything is a blur?? AND AT ONE POINT SHE WAS LIKE: "oh and have you ever heard of Neil Gaiman?" And I was trying not to scream, because yes, of course I've heard of Neil, he's only my favorite author, I've only read like all of his books multiple times, and if you say you worked on Good Omens or the Sandman I'm going to lose it completely. So I said "yeah I've read a couple of his books," -you know, like a liar- "what about him?" and she goes "well I worked on one of his shows and he's brilliant i just can't remember which one" and i go "w-what do you mean he's brilliant? You're.. you're talking about his writing... his writing is brilliant, right?" And she cheerfully says "oh no I don't read books, I ment he was really nice and brilliant when I talked to him" and i go "WHAT DID YOU TALK ABOUT WHAT DID YOU TALK ABOUT" and she thinks for a moment and goes "oh! BRICKS" WHAT IN THE WORLD YES NO THAT MAKES SENSE YOU GET TO WORK AND TALK WITH NEIL FUCKING GAIMAN AND YOU TALK ABOUT BRICKS? NO THAT'S TOTALLY NORMAL I'M NOT MAD ".... it was what I was designing at the time, I needed to know what vibe the bricks should have. Anyway want to see the spinning fireplace I made for doctor who" WHAT THE FUCK.

@neil-gaiman do you remember any brick conversations by any chance

Alone, betrayal, failure, fear, hide. You can do it for anyone, but I’m curious about Anaria.

alone: How does your OC deal with loneliness? Have they ever been completely alone before? How do they act when there's no one around to see them?

Anaria often feels lonely despite having lots of people around her. She feels like a lot of those relationships are fleeting, shallow, or not meaningful. They don’t really know her. They know the Princess of Nessar, the face she puts on for the public.

She deals with loneliness by getting very attached to the people that do know the real her, like Hali and Sylvae, and eventually Girad. She can be rather codependent at times.

She’s been completely alone while captured by Ivaran. For a while she’d just been left in a cell for days with no contact with anyone save for Ivaran and the guard who brought her food and water. With this kind of loneliness, she could do nothing but try her best to endure it. There was a lot of self-hugging, because she’s craving a touch from those she loves.

When she’s alone and not captured, Anaria can sometimes find some peace. She doesn’t have to put up with shallow lords who want her attention. Usually her alone time happens when she’s taking care of her garden. She likes to talk and sing to her plants. They are living things, after all!

Then there’s the other side of Anaria, the one that grows after captivity. When that Anaria is alone, she drinks a lot, doesn’t take care of herself, and is very destructive. She is definitely an alcoholic at that point.

betrayal: Has your OC ever been betrayed by someone they thought they could trust? Has your OC ever betrayed someone who trusted them?

Only read if you want spoilers for the book(s)!

Anaria is betrayed by her trusted servant Wyniin. Wyniin sides with Ivaran and helps orchestrate Anaria’s capture.

And absolutely yes to her having betrayed someone else. She betrays Girad when she doesn’t tell him she’s pregnant with his baby and endangers herself and said baby for the sake of bloodlust and revenge. Girad doesn’t trust her for a while after this.

failure: What's your OC's greatest failure? Have they been able to move past it? Does anyone else know about it?

More spoilers and talk of miscarriage! Read with care!

Anaria feels that her greatest failure is in not sharing her pregnancy with Girad and going into battle while carrying their child. She suffers an injury that results in a miscarriage, which is the way Girad finds out she was even pregnant in the first place.

I haven’t written that part yet, so it’s hard to say if she moves past it or not. Probably not, honestly. She made bad choices with very real consequences that effected a lot of people.

Girad, Hali, Sol, Dyon, Sylvae, and Anika are the only ones who know about this. They don’t want word of any of it getting out to the people. Anaria already feels like that list above is too many people to know about it.

fear: What is your OC's greatest fear? What do they do when confronted with it? Are they open with their fear, or do they hide it away?

Anaria’s greatest fear is the loss of flight. She’s attached her sense of freedom to flight, and felt awful when that was taken from her in captivity.

When confronted with it, like when Hali loses her wings and she herself almost does, she panics. She usually tries to bury her fears deep and deal with them when alone, but that one is just too much for her.

She is not open about this fear after she sees Hali suffer from losing her wings. She thinks she would only burden her or sound callous and selfish.

hide: What does your OC hide? Why do they hide it?

Anaria hides the brand from Ivaran. She knows it as a slave’s brand, and sees it as him having ownership of her. She feels that if she were to reveal it more openly, her already contested place as Sol’s successor would be put into question. (The people don’t think her capable after her captivity.)

(teaching my art class)

me: and what’s the number one rule when designing characters with wings? …well?

a handful of students, sighing reluctantly: no good fa-

me (interrupting them): NO good-faith attempts at realism, EVER. you want all the bird dweebs and physicists jumping ship as EARLY AS POSSIBLE so they’re not around to cinemasins your ass when you get to the cool parts of your story, and…ugh, what now, gerald

gerald (my least favorite student): why not just do some minimal research instead of-

me: listen you little shit i can and will singlehandedly tank your 4.0 gpa

.

historical drama/sitcom where two gay best friends (woman and man) get lavender married--and proceed to spend the Fancy European Honeymoon their parents paid for acting as each other's wingman