#self deprecating Izuku is best Izuku
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Bakudeku correct quotes part four; Gays? In our hero academia? Most likely.
Katsuki: Just a minute. I need to go take out the trash.
Izuku: Oh. We're going out?
Katsuki: Wh…
Katsuki: What do you want to be for Halloween?
Izuku: Yours.
Katsuki:...
Katsuki: …yeah, that would be pretty scary.
Izuku: Hey, random question, what are your favorite flowers?
Katsuki: Peonies, why?
Izuku:...
Katsuki: Were you going to get me flowers?
Izuku:...
Katsuki:
Izuku: ᶦᵗ’ˢ ᵃ ᵖᵒˢˢᶦᵇᶦˡᶦᵗʸ
Katsuki: You got a date yet Izuku?
Izuku: No…
Katsuki: Well you do now! Get your ass up and hold my hand!
Izuku: I’m in love with you.
Katsuki: We called off the prank war last night at midnight, dork.
Izuku: I know.
Katsuki: Ah. Okay. Um. Cool. Neat. Very cool. Cool. Cool. Coolcoolcool-
Izuku: I don't need to go to bed. I'm not tired, I'll be fine.
Katsuki: But, darling, I'll be so lonely without you. Come curl up in my arms so I can feel whole again.
Izuku: O-oh. Well. Are you trying to seduce me into healthy sleeping patterns??
Katsuki: Is it working?
#mha#bkdk#bakudeku#bnha#izuku midoriya#bakugou katsuki#my hero academia#mha bkdk#boku no hero academia#dekubaku#ktdk#dkbk#decchan#katsuizu#katsudeku#seducing somebody into healthy sleep#self deprecating Izuku is best Izuku#bkdk incorrect quotes#this was made with the incorrect quotes generator
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soft awkward izuku fluff
izuku doesn't do this.
he doesn't like nightclubs, finding them too loud and crowded. with his line of work he's constantly on edge, so it's seeming impossible for him to "let go" in an environment like this.
he doesnt like hard liquor, preferring to sip a beer, or two, throughout the night because he'd always been a lightweight and he'd hate to ruin someone else's night by having them babysit him. kacchan's complained about it more than once.
he doesn't like small talk, it's not one of his strong suits. he can be a bit oblivious to social cues and tends to ramble incessantly about quirks, and all might and topics much too personal for polite conversations with strangers. he always ends up stammering out apologies and turning beet red when he gets "the look".
izuku doesn't do this.
he really did not want to go out tonight.
he really did not want to put on this dress shirt.
he really did not want to wait at the bar.
he turns around to look at his friend group. they're all laughing and carrying on with models and bottle girls that are desperate for their attention. even kacchan seems to be having a good time, probably recounting his victories and relishing in the way the girls linger to his every word. it's just not like that for izuku, he's always felt so awkward.
izuku doesn't do this.
he isn't some cassonova, like shinsou or sero, that can have a girl leaving with them before they'd even exchanged pleasantries.
he isn't cool or funny, like kaminari or kirishima, that can laugh a girl right out of her panties.
he isn't mysterious like shoto or confident like kachaan, whose mere existence is enough to attract a harem.
izuku doesn't do this.
he isn't his friends.
he's just--
"deku!?"
you're pretty, so so pretty; beautiful even.
your smile is radiant; it leaves him breathless.
your voice is angelic; like his own personal symphony.
your eyes are kind; he could stare into them for hours.
your body is amazing; you look so soft-- he wants to touch you in all the best, and worst, ways.
your scent is hypnotic, it compliments you perfectly; he can't stop himself from leaning in-- it's like he's in a trance.
"wow, i can't believe i'm meeting my favorite hero! what can i get for you?"
he's your favorite hero? praise all might, he's blessed. to think that an angel like you had even considered his presence was astounding. if this was a different time, he'd worship at your feet with offerings of sacrifice and allegiance. you are the embodiment of all the beautiful things in the world that he'd sworn to protect. he doesn't even know your name but he's already named your three children and decided where you all would vacation in the summers.
izuku doesn't do this, because if he did he wouldn't have said that out loud and you wouldn't be giving him "the look". and fuck if he isn't mortified. can he not be a fucking nerd for once in his miserable existence ? maybe shinsou can brainwash him into forgetting how you flipped him off and called him a creep. his self deprecating mind can't handle that kind of torment on repeat.
izuku doesn't do this… and it seems like you can tell because why haven't belittled him ? why haven't you ran in the other direction? why aren't you giving him 'the look' anymore ? why are you smiling at him ?
"do i at least get to help plan the wedding? or was marriage not on the agenda?"
a joke.
that was a joke.
you were laughing with him, and not at him.
"of c-course you could help p-plan it but i think you should give me your number first".
he can thank the vestiges of OFA for that confident delivery because he was on the verge of passing out.
you whistled lowly, then bent down to grab two beers from under the bar.
"how about we start with names and see where the night takes us, huh? cheers".
izuku doesn't do this, but with the feeling of your fingers brushing his own as you hand him the drink lets him know that you're well worth it. he doesn't like his shirt, or this club but he likes you.
"cheers"
#deku x black reader#deku x chubby reader#deku x reader#mha deku#izuku midoriya imagine#izuku midoriya#midoriya fluff#midoriya x black reader#midoriya x reader#mha fluff#mha imagines#mha x reader#mha x blackreader
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Impactful Intervention
Tea Type: Half and Half (Fluff with Hurt/Comfort)
Potential Triggers: Eating disorder talk(anorexic leaning), and self-deprecation though it’s not super explicit in either case!
Pairing: Bakugou, Kirishima, Izuku, Ochaco, Mina, Denki and Shinsou/Reader (Can be read platonic or romantic)
Length: 2.1k+
Summary: You get reminded you’re not nearly as alone in your struggles as you like to think.
A/N: Sheridan here! This is super self-indulgent so I banged this out when struggling with the exact issue in the fic when I didn’t want to eat 😅 This is a continuous series with this as the first fic! Not much twording this is just pure hurt/comfort and fluff really, with some minor twords! I’m tagging it as a tlc: fic rather than a tword fic, but it will be tword series in 2 chapters, so I hope you all look forward to it!
“Why don’t you eat more often?”
The question was blunt and close enough to your ear that it tickled, making you flinch away from Todoroki with a squeak.
His question registered and you swallowed nervously under his perceptive gaze, shoving a fry in your mouth before faking as bright a smile as you could.
“I eat plenty! I just had a big breakfast.”
The familiar lie fell all too easily from your tongue.
Todoroki sat across from you with a reluctant hum of acknowledgment along with Kirishima and then Bakugou, as Deku and Ocacho sat on either side of you.
The quiet now that had overtaken the table was uncomfortable and you were feeling jittery under several gazes.
“S-So anyway-
Deku spoke up before you could change the subject.
“You’ve said that to me before too; Todoroki is kinda right. Every time I offer you a snack you always say no.”
He was pouting and your smile widened nervously as you waved him off.
“You’re worrying too much! Really, I promise I’m eating enough. I wouldn’t be able to train as hard as I do otherwise right?”
Deku’s eyes were still worried but he nodded in agreement after a moment’s thought.
“Yeah, I suppose you’re right.”
Most eyes looking at you turned away after that and you breathed a sigh of relief, your smile losing some of its anxiety.
You didn’t expect to look up and meet Bakugo’s stalwart gaze. You nearly flinched in surprise but caught yourself; instead looking away quickly and rushing to shove a chicken nugget down your throat.
Given his eyes still hadn’t left you, you couldn’t very well throw out your tray. So, you crafted a hasty excuse, checking your phone and making a show as your eyes widened before you hopped up, grabbed your bag, and dashed off with a rushed.
“Sorry guys I totally forgot I have to return this book to the library today or it’ll be late!!”
Once out of the cafeteria you found you could breathe again; heart pounding a mile a minute. That was too close. Your friends didn’t need to share your burdens. They were your stupid hangups and deficiencies. No need to pile more on than they already definitely had.
You made your way back to your dorm and tried to relax as your stomach growled.
Later that day; burgundy eyes scanned the library’s sign-in book and narrowed as his fist met the wooden stand harshly.
-----
The next day you headed to class and it went as usual. You felt you could finally relax; joking easily with Deku, Denki and Mina like any other day. It seemed that yesterday’s heavy conversation had all but been forgotten.
Until the end of the school day.
You trailed after Bakugou as he dragged you by the wrist after him protesting weakly.
“B-Bakugou! I can walk you know! Just tell me where we’re going first!!”
The fiery blond was uncharacteristically silent and a chill went down your spine. What was causing him to act like this? Was everything okay?
You quickened your pace as best you could.
Bakugou shoved you in front of him into his dorm room and you typically would have demanded to know what was going on…but the worried eyes and the way all mumbled conversation stopped when you entered made it all too clear.
It had been too easy yesterday after all.
You turned without a second thought but Bakugou was already ahead of you, leaning too casually against the exit with his back and foot against the door and staring you down impassively.
You gritted your teeth but tried to keep your anxiety at bay.
“What the Hell is this?”
“Don’t get so cagey; we just want to talk."
You reluctantly turned your gaze from the door to Todoroki, ever the mediator.
Your smile was obviously forced, unlike yesterday.
"Little hard not to be when I get dragged halfway across the school and have the exit blocked like I’m a wild animal.”
Your voice was not shaking.
“We tried to talk to you yesterday but you just…brushed it off. We wanted to do it in a more intimate setting where you’d hopefully feel safer with fewer of us.”
Deku clarified, fidgeting nervously with his fingers as his gaze flicked between your eyes and his hands.
“We just wanna help.”
Your answer was instant.
“I don’t need help. Can someone please tell me what we’re doing here?”
A snort from behind you made you glance back and you tensed at the intensity in Bakugou’s expression, defensive, more so than you already were.
Kirishima must’ve sensed it too since he moved to stand and held his hands up placatingly.
“Hey man don’t-
But it was too late.
Bakugou was already closing in on you and your breath caught as he easily cornered you against the edge of his bed, tall frame towering over you.
When your eyes instinctively moved to look away from his he hissed and grabbed your chin, his touch gentle but firm.
"No. Look at me. I have one very simple question for you, nerd. And if you lie to me? Consider our friendship over. You got that?”
Your vision was blurring but you nodded shakily. Despite his tough exterior, you’d grown close to him. Were friends with both him and Deku respectively. So for him to threaten something so serious when you both know he’d follow through…needless to say you were petrified.
“Why did you lie about having a book to return yesterday? And I’ll save you one potential lie. I checked the sign in sheet after school yesterday. Think carefully before you answer.”
He grunted before releasing you, turning on his heel and returning to his place at the door where he continued staring you down.
You felt helpless. What else could you say? You’d been caught red handed.
“You…you really lied? But you hate lying!”
You smiled bitterly at Deku’s words, but nodded in agreement.
“You’re not wrong there. But I…”
You took a deep breath and moved to get comfortable on Bakugou’s bed, knowing you’d need to sit down for this. You were half facing Bakugou and Kirishima who was now at his side by the door and the others who, now that you somewhat had the guts to look, consisted of Deku, Todoroki, Kaminari, Uraraka and Ashido. You flinched a little as you noticed Shinsou in the corner, so quiet you would’ve missed him if he hadn’t been watching you so intensely.
That settled it for you, there really was no choice here.
You closed your eyes as you felt overwhelmed and jumped at the feeling of an arm wrapping around your shoulders, reluctantly opening your eyes and looking to see Ashido smiling cheerfully at you. Kaminari wasn’t far behind as he hopped up onto your other side and joined your makeshift hug.
You hadn’t even realized how much you’d been shaking until then and luckily their touch was grounding, helping you to breathe better and focus.
“Shit…okay. Um…”
Your eyes went to the floor and you hated that they were already stinging.
“I just…I d-don’t really like eating in front of people? That’s how it started I guess. I-
A deep exhale escaped your lips and your eyes jerked between your friends in worry.
"Oh God what if I trigger you guys? This is why I didn’t want to tell anyone I don’t want to burden-”
“Hey.”
Shinsou’s voice was gentle but clear and at it you instantly quieted, meeting his gaze in surprise.
“We’re all here because we want to be and we care about you. Every single one of us has noticed the signs. If we weren’t prepared for it; we wouldn’t be converging like this.”
As usual, his words were nothing but unblemished truth and you let out a shaky half laugh. Even when you were on the verge of a breakdown he could stop you from spiraling. At least some things hadn’t changed. Still, you nodded and got ready to continue.
“Okay.”
Deep breath.
“I’ve kinda slowly just…not wanted to eat really?”
Your voice was little more than a squeak before you rushed to continue.
“I mean!! I do eat sometimes! I snack now and again but I mainly have 1 meal a day and it’s highly unlikely I even finish that.”
You rolled your eyes skyward and looked at Bakugou’s ceiling finding it much easier to talk when you weren’t looking at anyone.
“I lied because…It’s not any of your problems. You’re dealing with so much already; who am I to pile on or complain ya know? Besides, it doesn’t matter anyway. It’s really not that bad.”
Your dismissive words finally triggered a roar that had Kaminari and Ashido both rushing back towards the main circle as Bakugou lunged.
“Not that bad!?!”
“Eep!”
You squeaked as he easily pinned you down while straddling your waist holding your wrists with one hand while gesturing wildly with the other as he ranted.
“Now you listen to me and you listen good! First of all; you can and damn well better come to us! We’re all here for you and you can bet your ass I’m sure we’re all going to help you overcome this. Something you left out but I’m sure you think; you’re not fat.”
Oh, look! Just like that, you’re crying.
Deku had puffed his cheeks up and he hopped up and bounced over to nod energetically at you.
“Kacchan is right! You’re really nimble! One of the fastest in class in fact!”
“And also one of the weakest.”
You thought your mumble would go unnoticed but Shinsou startled you by running his fingers through your hair and shaking his head, fondness in his gaze.
“Dummy. You’re one of the strongest people I know. You have an emotion-based Quirk and still manage to keep up with your hero friends. You’re a badass.”
Well, now you were blushing and crying. Gosh, you felt like a hot mess.
“I second that! And you’re always looking out for us when we have any issues! You bake the class sweets all the time, always listen attentively whenever any one of us has a bad day. Heck, you even tried to help Mineta learn how to talk to girls.”
Kirishima chuckled.
Uraraka giggled at that, making your blush darken.
“Which is extra cute considering how blushy and stammery you’d get around all the boys but especially Bakugou at first, remember?”
Ashido joined in with a laugh of her own.
“Ohmygosh that’s right!! Even with us girls, she was shy and hard to get to open up. She was still the class sweetheart even then though~”
You groaned, hiding your face in your arm.
“Don’t remind me. I couldn’t help it!! It was my first time being around attractive guys; I had no clue how to react!”
“Aw, you think I’m attractive?”
Bakugou smirked down at you and even as you were sure you were a tomato by now you stuck your tongue out at him playfully.
“Don’t let it go to your head hotshot~”
He snickered as Kaminari strode over to poke your cheek, grinning as you tried to bite his finger.
“Hey! Brat!”
He chuckled before rubbing the back of his neck nervously.
“Anyway; you probably don’t know but you’re not alone with what you’re goin through. I dunno about the rest but I’ve struggled with eating stuff too. If you need me to remind you or someone just to talk to those who’ve been through it? My dorm room is always open.
Todoroki raised a hand at that, shy but supportive.
"Mine too.”
You found yourself misty-eyed but nodded sheepishly.
“I… I’m willing to try, then. If you guys don’t mind helping and it’s not a pain-wah!”
You jerked as Bakugou squeezed your side to cut you off with a grumble despite the quickly growing smirk on his face.
“Stop. Putting. Yourself. Down. In fact…”
An idea lit his eyes that already made you squirm as he turned to face the others.
“I say we tickle her anytime she says anything self-deprecating or when she apologizes for no reason. Sound fun?”
Your eyes widened. Bastard!! That was supposed to be a secret! He promised!
Seeing the look on your face he snickered.
“Consider this my payback for lying. Lucky you you’ll get to have 7 more lers to go to now~”
With that he pulled back, grin all the more wicked as he looked back at your apprehensive friends. Sensing what he was about to do, you whined.
“Baku don’t you fucking dare-”
But he was already speaking over you.
“Don’t look so nervous; she’d sooner die than admit it but she actually loves it.”
Well if you weren’t a tomato before…
As your friends all closed in with giddy grins quickly mirrored by you you couldn’t help but think how lucky you were to have such amazing friends.
…You were still gonna kill Bakugou for this later though.
#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#female reader#boku no hero academia fic#my hero academia fic#bakugou x reader#izuku midoriya x reader#shinsou hitoshi x reader#todoroki x reader#denki x reader#ochaco x reader#shinsou x reader#mha x reader#bnha fluff#bnha x reader#kirishima x reader#mina x reader#tlc: fic#tlc: milk tea
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A lot of times the problem with these het ships is just, that there is an incredible lack of balance in it that almost feels toxic.
And i don't mean dark fiction or anything, i mean fiction that wants you to see them as a good couple.
Like in bnha, again. Iz///ocha has an inbalance over the fact that for it to go forward, it is completely reliant on Ochako, and whatever she decides to do with her feelings.
Which makes her the only one that ever puts the effort into her crush, even if it ends up not actually moving forward, she still the one who's ever confronted with them.
And Izuku never does anything to respond or even indicate that he feels the same. Frankly, if he was to suddendly show that he loves her, that would just make him look like an intruder. Or maybe even imply "now that everything's over, here's your prize, hero!"
I agree!!
While IzuOcha is a popular ship, it's also not compared to BakuDeku and even TogaOcha got some growth over it.
It's not because "het is ew" because I have crossed other shippers who are okay with IzuOcha and/or have other M/F ships they like (I myself like KiriMina).
It's because it is underdeveloped and one-sided.
Izuku reacts to Ochako the same way he has with every other girl. Any time there's crush talk, it's only from Ochako's side. Nothing from Izuku, at all. He compliments her, but it came off more like a bestie hyping you up after you say something self-deprecating than actual "Hey, I like you, let's go out".
To be honest, I don't even think Horikoshi intended for IzuOcha to be seen a ship for people to root for. I don't think he actually ever cares for it because if he really wanted to, he could have made it more balanced. I say this because look at M/F pairings like KiriMina and KamiJiro.
They're more minor than IzuOcha are and yet for both pairings there's a lot more balance between them. Even by design!
I talk more in depth about this here and here.
I totally agree with you on that last bit.
If Izuku suddenly goes "Hey, I love you" or even after winning there's suddenly them hooking up, it will come off as Ochako being some prize because, again, Izuku hadn't shown romantic interest in her like that.
It's funny to me that some people will "BakuDeku are like brothers" but then turn around and want to apply the same tropes and scenarios that BkDk have been through to their ship romantically.
Example, there were people who actually want AFO!Shigaraki to attack Ochako next just so Izuku could save her. This was during the time when everyone was brought in through those portals into the same area.
When I was so agitated about that because one, you really want someone to potentially get killed just for a "shippy" moment? I DIDN'T LIKE SHIGARAKI ATTACKING BAKUGOU LIKE THAT!! Two, so Ochako couldn't be dealing with her situation without any inference? Like she really need to be put in a damsel situation and not be a hero? Because that's how it came off to me.
Look, I myself have ships, but at the end of the day when it comes to the main goal of a lot of these characters?
The last thing any of them really want is romance. If no ship becomes canon I am so okay with that.
A lot of these characters, especially characters like Izuku, Ochako, and Katsuki want to be the best heroes they can be. They want to save people, make them smile, be the best. That was their goal when they chose (and got to) attend UA.
I don't recall Ochako saying "I'm attending UA to get a boyfriend!"
So why reduce her to that? She did not look at Izuku on their first meeting and decided "I'm going to UA to be his wife". I thought she wanted to be a hero so she can make people smile and provide for her parents. Am I wrong? Did I miss something? Did I watch and read a different version of BNHA?
#kiya answers#bnha#mha#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#uraraka ochako#uraraka ochaco#midoriya izuku#bakudeku#bkdk#togachako#togachaco
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Did you see the extras from volume 39? I read ruk’s translation of the imamura and am curious about it. Does it come off more as a cultural Japanese being-very-humble sort of thing ? Or is there something more going on under the surface that is worrisome?
It reads as not only super Japanese but super Horikoshi. Culturally, the west doesn't always talk about this sort of concept in the same way. What he's really talking about is how there is this ideal version of MHA that gets published when all people working on it come together and do their jobs. In the interest of the MHA final product, Horikoshi's editor is willing to take the heat for doing something that could be seen as inconsiderate of the other mangaka serialized in WSJ. Horikoshi is also being self-deprecating out of politeness to show how grateful he is for what his superiors occasionally do for his sake. He's also showing his gratitude to the fans by apologizing for any disappointment these changes may have caused them and for setting new, potentially lower expectations for us. A lot of these bits that are self-deprecating or show low self-esteem are very much Japanese cultural things.
I say it's super Horikoshi too because Horikoshi often behaves like something of a perfectionist. He does tend to apologize for not being basically a manga machine. The dude cranks out enviable quality and quantity each week all things considered. I'm pretty sure every mangaka on earth is jealous of what he accomplishes. But I'm sure in Horikoshi's mind, his efforts never quite achieve his most desired goal--to draw MHA the way he plans it from the outset. He speaks often of time constraints and physical limitations that prevent him from accomplishing everything he wants (which I imagine is 19 immaculately drawn pages each week). The thing is, other mangaka draw less detail because of these time constraints. Horikoshi's drawing goals are actually very lofty for the amount of detail he always puts in. What he manages to accomplish already is quite honestly insane. These goals and his implied level of perfectionism seem to be the root of a lot of his apologies, but I think he also is apologizing to himself for not getting to finish everything he wants to. And striving for perfection by trying your best is a big piece of the Japanese zeitgeist.
If your question is if we should be concerned about some hidden cry for help, I'd say no. Japan does have horrible work-life balance, and mangakas are notorious for such backbreaking schedules especially, but this is all the norm. Horikoshi speaks on these issues in no way that surprises me. I suspect Horikoshi doesn't often adjust his weekly drawing plans to what's feasible. He doesn't compromise. He's probably got the highest expectations for himself out of everyone. And he's likely been burnt out for quite a while now.
Also, the final line about not being fit for society reads like a joke. That whole bit about not causing trouble for others by meeting your deadlines is also very Japanese and collectivist. It's a normal collectivist society thing to not want to be a burden to others. Hell, just look at Izuku. You may read him as special for his heroism, but very much about Izuku reads more like the (ideal) Japanese everyman to whom readers are meant to relate.
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Author: Maxine
Pairings: BakuDeku
Rating: R
Chapters: 11/?
Notes: Accidental quirk shenanigans result in an unplanned pregnancy. Post-canon, no a/b/o dynamics.
Summary: It's not that Katsuki didn't want kids. He figured he'd have them one day, probably. That he and Izuku would adopt or maybe figure something else out.
This is NOT how it was supposed to go.
~~~~~
CHAPTER 11
He gets on campus without any issue, looking around in a daze of fond nostalgia. It’s been a while since he’s been back here, but of course nothing has changed. His feet take him directly to the main building where classes are held – there’s less than two weeks between terms, so spring break or not, Katsuki’s pretty sure he’d find a good portion of the teachers in their classrooms if he went looking. Prepping for the incoming students, getting ready for another year of molding little wannabe heroes, all that junk.
And sure enough, when he reaches classroom 1-A, he finds Aizawa sitting at his desk like he’s already waiting for the next crop of wide-eyed kids with big dreams to find their way there. He’s hunched over as he works, marking up various papers that are spread in front of him, and for a moment it almost feels like Katsuki’s the first one to class, bright and early in the morning, and the rest of his friends are going to pour in after him any second.
He hesitates in the doorway, letting the raucous noise of twenty teens who survived a war together fade out of his ears, and then shoves his hands into his pockets and clears his throat.
“You not a fan of the teachers’ lounge or something?”
Aizawa’s head snaps up, his good eye landing on Katsuki in brief surprise before he settles into his usual dry, unaffected countenance. “Certain other members of the staff who enjoy being unnecessarily loud are working in there right now. I took that as my sign to get the hell out.” It’s quick, and probably accidental, but Katsuki doesn’t miss the way the man’s gaze drops ever so briefly to his midsection before bouncing back up again. “How are you, Bakugou?”
…Shit.
Okay then.
Best get it over with.
“So…you know. Right?” Katsuki pulls his hands free again and instead crosses his arms somewhat defensively low across his chest, just above the baby bump that really isn’t staying hidden anymore. “Which idiot ran their mouth?”
Aizawa lets out a small sigh and sets his pencil down before meeting Katsuki’s probing stare. “Shinsou. But if it helps, it seemed like an accident and I don’t think he told any of the other staff members. I just happen to see him regularly.”
Fucking of course. He should’ve known.
“It’s whatever,” Katsuki grumbles, eyes drifting to the side for a moment before darting back. “Easier if I don’t have to say it, I guess. Still gonna kick his ass, though.”
“Presumably after…” Aizawa gestures toward Katsuki’s stomach, which makes him snort out a self-deprecating little laugh despite himself.
“Nah, I could take him now,” he says with a sharp grin. “Kid hasn’t totally incapacitated me yet.” A beat passes, and the grin fades as Katsuki shoots Aizawa a faintly sheepish look. “Uh… Sorry I never returned your call, sensei.”
That has the corner of Aizawa’s mouth tugging upward in obvious amusement. “I think you’ve been justifiably preoccupied.”
“No kidding.”
“You seem to be handling it well, though.”
“Sure, now.” Katsuki scowls. “After totally losing my shit for the first couple weeks.”
“Your ability to maintain your problem child status never ceases to amaze me,” Aizawa says wryly. “Tell Midoriya I scheduled my retirement the second Shinsou let the news slip. The idea of having your combined genes in my classroom immediately gave me a migraine.”
“Your loss,” Katsuki snarks back at him. “She’s probably gonna be the greatest hero of her generation – if she wants.”
Continue reading at AO3.
Through chapter 11 now posted!
#bnha#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#bakugou katsuki#midoriya izuku#bakudeku#dekubaku#katsudeku#decchan#bkdk#dkbk#mpreg#bnha mpreg#bkdk mpreg#dkbk mpreg#bnha fic#mha fic#bkdk fic#dkbk fic#fic
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Apologies and Affirmations
Apologies and affirmations
by bug orsomething
"I'm useless." "I look ugly in this." "I can't do anything right." "I'm so stupid." She knows that many middle schoolers struggle with self-image but Inko is so tired of the only thing coming from her beautiful, strong, and intelligent son's mouth being self-deprecating.
Words: 1266, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English
Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Categories: Gen
Characters: Midoriya Inko, Midoriya Izuku
Relationships: Midoriya Inko & Midoriya Izuku
Additional Tags: Midoriya Izuku Has Self-Esteem Issues, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Worth Issues, Middle School Student Midoriya Izuku, Pre-Canon, Supportive Midoriya Inko, Good Parent Midoriya Inko, shes best mom, author wishes their mom loved them more, Dialogue Heavy
Read Here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/43125307
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And Now His Hair Smells Like Pond Water | I. Midoriya
Summary: And then Kacchan pushed him into the pond, and threw his books in after him. And now his hair smells like pond water and mildew.
Pairing: Izuku Midoriya x reader
Warnings: Middle school au, swearing, bullying, angst, the briefest mention of suicide/suicidal thoughts, self-deprecation (by Izuku), Bakugou is a bully, reader is blunt and kind of mean, no sympathy, lots of rain
Word Count: 3.1k
Available on AO3 here
Note: I... don’t know what this is. It started off as a character study and then derailed into something that means nothing, amounts to nothing and doesn’t really say anything of importance. But it exists and so I’m posting it.
And now his hair smells like pond water and mildew.
Izuku is silent as he sits with his head down in the rain. Around him, water droplets hit the surface of the koi fish pond with little plink! sounds, turning the usually glassy surface into complete static. His books, which float around him in the dark water, are already beginning to soak through and as his maths textbook slowly sinks beneath the surface, he feels his heart go with it. The pond water itself is icy since the season was still barely April, and Izuku’s already shivering as his clothes begin to soak and his hair begins to droop as raindrops bead on his long eyelashes before rolling down his cheeks.
When they run over his lips, they taste a little salty. Maybe they're not raindrops at all.
If Izuku is honest with himself, he’s not surprised about what happened. Not in the slightest. Kacchan has always been hateful towards his ideas of being a hero, and has made it clear to Izuku not to voice them when he’s around. Which makes sense because Izuku is quirkless and a loser and probably the scrawniest kid in the whole of Aldara Junior High - any idea of him being a hero is absurd.
Izuku knows this. He knows. But he’s also stupidly optimistic. And too many times, he’s forgotten Kacchan’s one, unspoken rule - don’t play hero.
That's what got him dumped in the koi pond by his childhood friend. That's the reason why his books are now waterlogged and he has to go home and explain again to his mom that he’d tripped and fallen right into the sludgy water.
He knows that she doesn’t believe him. Not anymore. Not after it’s happened again and again. But Izuku can't think of another excuse and he certainly can't tell her the truth. Not when he knows how sad she’ll be.
Something that must be thunder rumbles overhead. Izuku remembers them saying there’d be a storm today. “Lighting” they’d warned, and told everyone to stay inside and not be out driving too late.
If there was anyone around to see him, Izuku thinks he might have gotten out of the pond. For the sake of himself or their concern - either way, he’d haul himself up despite the weight of his waterlogged gakuran and offer his bright smile and talk about how silly of him it was to have tripped like this.
But there isn’t anyone around and so he just sits there, with his head down and his eyes low. Because when he doesn’t have to pretend otherwise, he knows the truth. He knows the real reason he was shoved into the fish pond, knows it and understands it to such a depth that it makes him want to vomit.
Because what Kacchan, or his mom, or the entire rest of Aldara Junior High doesn’t know is that Izuku hates himself just as much as his childhood best friend does. Izuku’s not a victim and Kacchan’s not a bully because they share a mutual understanding - an understanding of the fact that despite how foolishly optimistic Izuku likes to be and despite the way Kacchan likes to sneer across the classroom and tell jokes at Izuku’s expense, they both know that Izuku is actually completely useless.
Not a future hero. Not a young man who can stand in the face of an adversary, and ignore the jeers and the laughter and the teasing over the fact that he’s quirkless. Not someone who can triumph despite the hardship.
No, he’s just useless. Quirkless and useless. Useless and quirkless. And sometimes there's no point pretending otherwise.
As Izuku sits in the water, he thinks about what the weatherman had said earlier that morning on the TV. About the lightning. And he wonders what would happen if lightning were to strike right now. Right here, right through him.
He wonders, for the briefest of seconds, if he’d be killed instantly. Part of him hopes he would be.
But then he pushes the thought away because it’s scary and has a weird sensation resting like a stone in the very base of his stomach.
Something tickles his fingers and he glances down to see a flash of orange and white. It’s a koi fish, a big one, that's swum right up to his leg and is investigating him curiously - it must be a brave one, all the others had swum off in a rush when he was thrown in and haven’t reappeared since.
Izuku doesn’t try to get it to go away. Part of him honestly hopes it will continue to nibble on him until all of him is gone, dissolved into the murky water of the fish pond. It would probably be nice to be just minerals floating through the water, he reasons with himself. Nicer than being a human. Nicer than being what he is now.
Izuku sighs aloud. His English-B textbook bumps against his knee, the happy family on the front cover smiling up at him still even through the gunk and rain. He reaches out this time to push the book away, too tired to be scrutinized by the blank eyes of the so obviously staged photo. The koi fish starts and then swims away, leaving Izuku alone again. He sighs aloud a second time.
“What are you doing?”
The voice is soft - soft and curious, and not in the least bit judgemental. Still, Izuku starts when he hears it because it’s the last thing in the world that he’s expecting - it's a voice that doesn’t belong in the cold, darkness of a rain - possibly lightning - storm.
And yet, it is there and when Izuku raises his head, hair shaggy and eyes droopy, he sees its owner for the first time and his surprise deepens even further.
Somehow, you still look ethereal in the rain.
You’ll probably complain about it tomorrow - or at least, he’ll hear you complaining from across the classroom - that the rain had your hair fucked, that your makeup was running and your jumper was absolutely soaked through. But right now, you’re not doing those things - you’re standing in front of him, right in the middle of the puddle that has formed on the pavement, with rivulets of raindrops running down your face. And your eyes, wide and concerned as they are, are on him.
Izuku’s never spoken to you personally before. You’re the one person he can’t approach because you’re the one person who seems able to approach him. You're the only one who can stand up to Kacchan and the only one who doesn’t listen when he yells and brags and calls everyone else useless. And you’re the only one who doesn’t seem to give a fuck about the fact that Izuku doesn’t have a quirk.
And still, the two of you have never spoken. Because your world looks so much wider than his, so much brighter. You’re strong, you're powerful, you’ve already been recommended to UA for the coming year. And he resents you just a bit, just a little little bit - the same way he resents Kacchan - because without even trying, you’re everything he wishes he could be.
Your eyes are sad now though. Sad, quiet, mournful even. Despite what you asked, Izuku thinks you know what happened. He doesn’t say anything.
You stand and stare for a moment, while Izuku just sits silently. And then you step forward. Your bag splashes a little as it hits the wet pavement, the canvas of it already soaked completely. And then Izuku’s eyes widen as you climb your way over the low stone ledge, shoes, socks and all, until you’re standing beside him, knee-deep in the murk of the pond.
“Hey,” you say and your fingers stretch out to poke into the flesh of his cheek. “Midoriya.”
“What?”
“What’re you doing?”
You repeat the question lightly as if you don’t notice all the weight that comes with it. Although, Izuku evidently isn’t as strong as you are because the words feel like they’re crushing his chest.
You squat down to match his eye level and again, Izuku wonders if the raindrops on his face are actually raindrops. He wipes them away either way and gives you his best attempt at a smile. You don’t smile back.
“I tripped,” Izuku says because it’s the only thing he really can say. His fake smile continues. “I think there’s an uneven brick in the path. You know how clumsy I am and…” but you’re already shaking your head, already frowning deeply, and Izuku trails off.
“Stop lying to me.”
Izuku blinks. “What?”
“Stop lying to me,” you repeat and your voice is firm. “You’re a terrible liar, Midoriya.”
“But I wasn’t-” Izuku tries, but again it’s another lie. And again you shake your head.
“Just stop. I saw it all anyway, I know exactly what happened. So there’s no point in trying to pretend it didn’t.”
And Izuku’s heart sinks a little bit as he stares up at you, because he realises with that same chilly, dreadful feeling that he’s felt all the other times, that you’re pitying him. You feel bad for him, because now you also see him as the kid who gets bullied, who gets kicked around and shoved into fish ponds. It makes him feel a little sick.
When you stand, water rushes down your legs in rivers. Your school uniform is soaked and Izuku can’t help but stare at it for a second as you tower over him. You’re going to walk away now, he’s sure of it. You’re going to realise he’s not worth any of your help. Or you’re going to baby him, try to take him to the nurse's office or pick up his floating books for him, or something - anything - that proves you feel sorry for him.
You don’t do any of that. Instead, you hold out an open hand towards him.
Izuku watches a water droplet roll down over your knuckle. When it drops off the tip of your fingernail and hurtles towards the churning water below, his eyes slide upwards and he meets your gaze with a confused expression.
“What’re you doing?”
“Helping you up,” you tell him in a bored voice and it’s so obvious he half expects you to add ‘duh!’ at the end. You don’t though, and simply wave your hand at him again expectantly. When he still doesn’t take it, your eyes roll just a bit.
“Come on,” you say. “It’s fucking freezing out here and I actually have places to be, Midoriya.”
It’s indignant, demanding, rude even as you openly cuss around him, and yet again Izuku is reminded a little of Kacchan. However it doesn’t bring the sick feeling back into his stomach, that same sick feeling he gets whenever he feels Kacchan’s eyes on him. It’s only your eyes now, water-rimmed and curious as they are. And he realises that he’s comfortable with you, despite the absurdity of the situation, despite the cold, and despite the water that’s turned his socks to sponges in his trainers. He doesn’t mind this.
Still, he has to ask.
“But why?”
And you look at him like he’s the stupidest person in the world. A scoff slips from your lips and you shake your head, brows pulled into a frown. “I'm not answering that,” you tell him eventually and then you reach out and grab his hand, having grown sick of waiting for him to give it to you.
Izuku doesn’t resist as you pull him from the water, doesn’t even blink at the sheer strength you use to haul his body upwards, soaked through and dripping. You don’t bother to help him collect his books and leave him to fish them out of the water on his own as you wade back to the edge of the pond. But you do wait for him once you’re out, head ducked against the rain and your drenched bag hooked over one shoulder. You wait as he hunts for his things, as he struggles with the wet zip on his backpack, as he shuffles back to the edge of the pond as best he can, and then climbs out, slowly, gingerly, with water rushing down his body. And then you turn away from him and begin to walk, not back towards the school building but in the direction of the gate.
Izuku doesn’t follow after you immediately. He’s sure you don’t want him to - why would you ever want him to? - and so he stands and stares at the bricks beneath his feet for a long moment. He only looks up when he hears a small, short cough.
You beckon him in your direction. “The fuck are you waiting for?” And he goes because he can’t quite believe what’s happening.
You lead him to a place he doesn’t recognise. Away from the street he usually takes to walk home and instead closer towards the sea. He can see the ocean from the road you lead him down, stretching out wide and flat and grey in the rain. The water is churning and dark with the pounding of the raindrops and for some reason when Izuku looks at it, he thinks of the way your eyes seemed to burn under water-coated lashes as you’d knelt before him in the pond.
His steps falter and then he stops completely, still staring. And then you turn around and grab his hand, and pull him along behind you, mumbling about how he can’t do anything by himself.
And he goes because he still can’t quite believe what’s happening.
Your house is big, warm and empty when you arrive. You don’t tell him why, don’t bother to explain the reason for the way the sound of the door opening echoes through the hallway in a way that tells Izuku that there’s not another soul around. And he doesn’t ask either, staring around with wide eyes as he toes off his shoes and then follows you down the hallways in his wet socks. There’s a trail of water left along the floor from the both of you, but you don’t bother to wipe it up and Izuku doesn’t either.
You get him a towel - it’s big and warm and soft, and smells distinctly of fabric softener. He wraps it around himself and follows, silently, as you lead him into a large, comfortable living room that feels like it’s never been lived in. Your own towel billows behind you like a cape and then you sit down, right on the carpeted floor, and tuck your legs neatly beneath you.
There’s a moment of silence before Izuku mimics you. He feels like his eyes are glued to your frame, his gaze trickling down like the droplets of water that drip down your cheeks. He purses his lips.
Then finally he does it. He asks.
“Excuse me?”
You don’t look at him but he sees your eyebrow quirk just slightly.
“Why did you bring me here?”
You’ve been expecting it, he can see that now. Your expression remains steady, calm, and it takes you a long time to look up at him. And when you do, your eyes are dull.
“Because I wanted to.”
You’re pitying him again, Izuku thinks, and it turns his stomach. He looks away, pulling the warmth of the towel a little closer to himself.
“You don’t have to feel bad for me.”
And you almost like like you’re going to laugh. “I don’t feel bad for you,” you tell him and it’s shocking. He looks back up at you, studying your face and you’re not lying. You’re not lying.
“You don’t…?”
“I don’t.” You shake your head. Then your eyes narrow. “Actually, I’m pretty mad at you.”
It doesn’t make sense. None of it. That you’re not pitying him, that you’re angry. That you speak to him at all. It doesn’t make sense.
“W-why are you mad?” he askes in a small voice and now you do actually laugh. It’s high and cold and sounds wrong, and yet for some strange, inexplicable, completely irrational reason, Izuku wants to hear it again.
“Because it’s you who’s feeling sorry for yourself,” you tell him. Your fingers are tight around the hem of your blanket, knuckles now white. “You’re pitying yourself, and it’s disgusting.”
“Disgusting…” he repeats in a voice that’s barely a whisper. You nod.
“You shouldn’t be,” you say and your voice is like ice. “You shouldn’t pity yourself. And you shouldn’t let him push you. And you shouldn’t just sit there, in the fucking koi fish pond like some pathetic loser!”
You’re just like Kacchan. That’s what he decides when he looks up and sees tears in your eyes. Angry tears. You’re exactly like him. The only difference really is that you’re sitting here now, having pulled him from the dirty water of the fish pond, when Kacchan was the one to push him into it.
“You don’t understand, Midoriya,” you say sniffing. “You don’t get it. It doesn’t make sense… why do you… and he’s always so mean…”
You’re genuinely upset, Izuku understands this. It’s the fact that your upset is for him that he doesn’t understand, can’t quite comprehend. ‘Why?’ is the question that keeps rattling around his head as he watches one of your tears trip off your nose. Why?
And he asks you. “Why?”
You laugh and he gets to hear it again, the grating of nails in your throat. Something in his chest tightens.
“You’re such an idiot,” you tell him. And then you reach for him. An he’s sure he’s never felt anything as soft as the skin of your palm when your fingers wriggle between his. And it still doesn’t make sense, none of it. But he doesn’t mind.
You don’t resist when he hugs you. You don’t resist when he pulls you closer than is appropriate by any circumstance so that your torso is pressed to his and your wet hair is trailing across his face. You don’t resist when he buries his nose in your shoulder and cries, properly, aloud, in a way he can recognise. In a way, he hasn’t allowed himself to do in so long.
And once he’s done crying, he pulls back and looks at you. And he sees that nothing has really changed. You’re still soaked to the bone. He’s still shivering. You’re still angry. He’s still tired.
But, he thinks suddenly, it’s all okay.
And for the first time, the corners of his lips tilt up. He smiles for no reason and for no reaction. Then you smile back. And nothing happens.
And his hair still smells like pond water and mildew.
#izuku midoriya#midoriya izuku#deku#deku x reader#izuku midoriya x reader#midoriya izuku x reader#izuku x reader#midoriya x reader#mha x reader#my hero academia fanfic#my hero academia x reader#my hero academia#bnha x reader#boku no hero academia x reader#boku no hero academia fanfic#izuku angst#💙 blue's fics
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Masterpost
About me !
Au List !
Obey me shall we date?
Reactions/Headcanons:
Reaction To You Not Eating Or Sleeping
Reaction To You Having Tattoos And Piercings
Reaction To You Protecting Luke
Reaction To You Working With Archangels
Mc’s Trauma
Their Views On You
Compliments
Pda Scale
Giving Them A Gift
Relaxing Together
Nicknames
Texts
Them as memes pt 2
Them as memes pt 3
Them as memes pt 4
Them as memes pt 5
Them as memes pt 6
Imagines:
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DSMP
Reactions/headcanons:
Angst
Angst
First Date
Cute Habits
Relaxing Together
When You Cup Their Face
When You Wipe Their Kiss Away
Sweet Nothings
Texts
Who Fell First And Who Fell Harder
Views
Compliments
Imagines:
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Mystic Messenger
Reactions/headcanons:
Their Views On You
You Cup Their Face
Texts
Compliments
Nicknames
Imagines:
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House of the dragon
Reactions/headcanons:
Pda Scale
Pda Scale pt 2
Couple Tropes
Them as memes
Them as memes 2
Habits
Asking To Put Makeup On Them
Sweet Nothings
Sweet Nothings pt 2
Their Favorite Thing About You
Favorite Thing About You pt 2
When You Wipe Away Their Kiss
You Fall Asleep On Their Shoulder
Relaxing Together
When You Cup Their Face
Nicknames
Who Fell First And Harder
Imagines:
If Word Gets Around
If Word Gets Around pt 2
Dream A Little Dream Of Me
Valentine Date
Good Night My Knight
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My Hero Academia
Reactions/headcanons:
Texts (Girl verison)
Pda Scale (Girl verison)
Jealousy Scale (Girl verison)
When You Cup Their Face
Who Fell First And Who Fell Harder (Boy verison)
Who Fell First And Who Fell Harder (Girl verison)
A Playful Argument About Who Fell First And Who Fell Harder
What He Does When Your Feeling Insecure
Texts (Boy verison)
Pda Scale (Boy verison)
Jealousy Scale (Boy verison)
Nicknames
Cuddling Them Out Of Nowhere
Imagines:
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Ikemen Revolution
Reactions/headcanons:
Texts
Texts Part 2
Views
Imagines:
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Wednesday
Reactions/headcanons:
Who Fell First And Who Fell Harder
Couple Trope
Jealousy Scale
Pda Scale
How They Tell You They Love You
Texts
Reaction To Reader Being Their Southern S/o
Reaction To Reader Who Makes Self-Deprecating Jokes
Cuddling Them Out Of Nowhere
Lazy Day
They Overhear You Saying You Like Them
What They Like About You
Sweet Nothings
Cute Habits They’ve Learned
Nicknames
Their Red Flag
When You Wipe Away Their Kiss
When You Cup Their Face
Protective Ajax
Yandere Xavier
Imagines:
Florist! Xavier
I Know You’re Obsessed With Me
I Know Your Obsessed With Me part 2
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Peaky Blinders
Reactions/headcanons:
Their Views On You
Nicknames
Sweet Nothings
Who Fell First And Who Fell Harder
Compliments
Couple Tropes
Imagines:
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Stranger things
Reactions/headcanons:
Pda Scale
Lazy Day
Couple Tropes
When You Wipe Away Their Kiss
When You Cup Their Face
First Thing They Noticed About You
Favorite Thing About You
How They Tell You They Love You
Sweet Nothings
Putting Make Up On Them
Jealously Scale
How They View You
Who Fell First And Who Fell Harder
Imagines:
Eddie Munson blurb
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TEXT THINGS
Chaotic relationship with Xavier Thorpe
Would You Still Love Me If I Was A Worm with Wednesday
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TIME STAMPS
5:38 Pm
12:56 Pm
4:12 Am
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Dating would include:
Dating Lord Diavolo and Lucifer
Dating Lord Diavolo and Mammon
Dating Leviathan and Barbatos
Dating Beelzebub and Simeon
Dating Seven and Yoosung
Dating Jumin and Jaehee
Dating Dream
Dating Sapnap
Dating Karl and Sapnap
Dating Karl Jacobs
Dating Solomon
Dating Simeon
Dating Mammon
Dating Lucifer
Dating Leviathan
Dating Satan
Dating Izuku Midoriya
Dating Enid Sinclair
Best Friend Enid Sinclair
Best Friends Wednesday Addams
Dating Tyler Galpin
Poly Dating Jacaerys and Lucerys
Dating Xavier Thorpe
Dating Robin Buckley
Dating Steve Harrington
Dating Eddie Munson
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Inspired playlists:
Mc Playlist
Lucifer Playlist
Lord Diavolo Playlist
Leviathan Playlist
Satan Playlist
Mammon Playlist
Belphegor Playlist
Solomon Playlist
Asmodeus Playlist
Barbatos Playlist
Dream playlist
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NSFW Posts if you’re under 18 DON’T READ!!!!
Kink Headcanon
Kink Headcanon part 2
Praise/Degration
Wanna Make A Baby?
In The Nightshade Library
A Whole New World
Tutor Au
Classroom
Kink list with Lucifer
Kink list with Leviathan
Kink list with Belphegor
Kink list with Satan
Kink list with Beelzebub
Kink list with Asmodeus
Kink list with Mammon
Kink list with Solomon
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Deku x FtM reader fic! No nsfw! Y/n replaces Mineta in this. Reader has hanahaki, and in this universe it can affect people who’s love is unreciprocated or if the victim is convinced that the other doesn’t feel the same. This is honestly a LOT angstier than I intended it to be, I am so sorry lmfao.
Word count: 2232
Warnings: hanahaki, internalized transphobia, self-deprecating thoughts, angst, detailed descriptions of vomiting, mentions of death, snapped ribs
Content: coming out, mentions of bullying and transphobia, hanahaki disease, angst with a happy ending, kissing
You had known you were trans for a while now, a couple years almost. When you came to UA, you had specifically requested to be put into the system as male, and for only the principal and a select few teacher to be made aware of your identity. You figured this was the best way to protect yourself, as the students in your last school had bullied you relentlessly when they found out. It was better this way, now you could live as male and no one would see you any differently.
Slowly, you began to develop a crush on the cute green haired boy in your class. You found yourself growing to want to spend as much time as possible with him, and staring at him in class and while he trained. It came off as a bit creepy, but you couldn’t help but stare at the pretty boy.
Somehow, you had convinced yourself that he would never like you back. The times you two did talk, he was very brief and seemed to want to get away as quickly as possible. Maybe it was because of your staring and he had noticed, maybe he had somehow found out you were trans. Either way, you felt like shit about it.
It had been 2 months when the petals started showing. Bright yellow sunflower petals spilled out of your lungs, pouring into the toilet you vomited into.
“Crap…” you muttered, staring at them as they floated in the water. You coughed again, a small stem shooting out.
You flushed and straightened your clothes and wiped your mouth. You knew what this meant. Get the surgery, or die. The chance that you had only convinced yourself that Izuku didn’t like you back was highly unlikely, his behavior had already showed that. He couldn’t maintain eye contact with you, couldn’t speak more than a sentence or two before he hurriedly left. He didn’t like you.
You walked back to class, nervously playing with your fingers when you took your seat. How long did you have left? You had had a crush on him for a while now, surely not long. The embarrassment of telling someone about it and admitting you would need the surgery was too much to bear. You’d rather die. What if they thought that your love was unreciprocated because you were trans, and no one could ever love someone like you?
You sat at your desk and tried to pay attention, but the tears started to roll. Of course this would happen to you. Of course it would. It as just your luck, wasn’t it? You stared at your lap, gripping your pant legs and trying to focus on your breathing, anything to stop crying.
Later, in your dorm and trying to sleep, you cried yourself to your dreams.
Life went on like this for about 3 months, the petals coming more and more often. You could see the toll it was taking on you. Your eye bags, your hollowed cheeks. Your ribs poking out through your skin. Your hip bones that jutted out far more than they should. You looked like you were dying, and you were. You coughed up whole flowers now, stem and all. With just your luck, it had to be giant sunflowers, making it a very tedious chore.
You sat in class again, trying to focus on your work. Not like it mattered, you’d be dead soon anyway. You glanced over at Izuku, smiling as he jotted things down in his notebook. He still took your breath away when you looked at him. How could he be so pretty, so kind? So loving and self-sacrificing? You told yourself that you deserved your disease, he was so caring to the rest of your class and so distant and cold to you, surely you had done something wrong. Maybe this was your punishment.
It wasn’t like you just admired him for his looks. You loved how amazing he was at battle strategy. How willing he was to save people, even if it lent sacrificing himself. His useless information of all things related to All Might. How he always tried to hard at school. How he’d help his classmates study and would let them vent to him about anything that troubled them. He truly was one of the best people alive, and you could die happy knowing you loved him.
He came up to you after class one day, noting your sickly appearance.
“Are you okay, Y/N?” He asked, his eyes showing worry and fear. You noted that his eyes looked sunken in, and his cheekbones were more defined. He hadn’t looked like that last week.
You were shocked, this was the first time he had come up to you to say something. Most of the time you had to initiate the “conversation”.
“Y-yes, thank you Midoriya. I’m alright.” You answered, hoping your lie was convincing. You coughed, a petal falling past your lips. You quickly flew your hand up to your mouth and crumpled it into your hand.
“Alright…” He said, furrowing his brow and walking away.
You rushed to the bathroom, another flower fit was starting. You flew down the hallway, tore open a stall, locked it, and kneeled down in front of the toilet. Almost immediately you felt the bud of a sunflower sliding up your throat and suffocating you, and forcing your mouth to open from your gag reflex. You coughed, grabbing the flower and tugging the rest of it out, the stem making you gag and screw your eyes shut in pain as you felt it slide up your throat. Why, oh why did it have to be sunflowers?
You coughed up a few more petals, and quickly snapped the sunflower in half so you could flush it down the toilet. You felt another flower coming, and you readied yourself to do the process over again.
5 times. That’s how many whole sunflowers you coughed up. Surely that mustn’t be good, you thought. You were going to die soon. But at least you would die loving the selfless green haired hero who loved anyone and everyone, besides you.
You fell asleep that night wondering what death would feel like.
It was Aizawa who noticed your decreasing health and asked you about it the next day.
“Y/n, you do not look well. Your cheeks are sunken in, you’ve lost all of your muscle mass, and your eye bags almost droop down to the floor. What’s wrong?” He asked, the expression of a worried father on his face.
“Nothing at all, I’ve just been off lately.” You answered, but it was obvious you were lying.
“Don’t lie to me, Y/N.” He scolded, “Whats’s wrong?”
You considered telling him the truth. He couldn’t be too upset, right?
“I- I have hanahaki.” You answered, staring at the floor.
“How long?”
“3 months.”
You heard him mutter a curse under his breath. It had been far too long of you suffering in silence.
“I need to know who it is, Y/N.” He asked, leaning back on his desk.
“I can’t say.” You immediately answered. You didn’t want to admit that the boy who loved everyone didn’t love you.
“I can’t help you if you don’t tell me.”
“Then you can’t help me.” You stated, turning around and rushing out of the classroom.
You knew you didn’t have much time left. If you pushed on your stomach, you could feel the outline of the flowers that awaited to be evicted. You sighed and tugged your shirt down, breathing hard to resist the compression of your binder. Your frail body has such a hard time with it now, it has already snapped a few of your ribs. You stared at your reflection in the boy’s bathroom mirror. You looked dreadful.
You sighed and turned to leave, noticing a familiar green haired boy staring at you with his gorgeous eyes from the entry way. He looked to be in a hurry. You panicked, but then looked at him more closely. We’re those… eye bags? And hollow cheeks? Surely he didn’t have hanahaki, who wouldn’t love him? It had to be something else.
“What we’re you doing?” He asked, stepping further into the bathroom.
You stepped back, “Nothing,” You said all too quickly. It was obvious you were up to something.
“I saw… I saw a flower through your stomach. What’s wrong?” He asked, stepping closer. His eyebrows were furrowed together and he clenched his fists beside him.
“I think you already know what’s wrong.” You whispered. He was close now, you were only a couple inches apart. It was the closest you had been to him ever.
You stared at him, his features. He was definitely skinnier. His shoulders weren’t as broad, his arms were thinner, his face lost its charming chisel. He was weakening.
“You have hanahaki.” He stated, in disbelief.
“I know.” You whispered back. You couldn’t bring your eyes to move their gaze from his, it was the first time he made eye contact with you. He has such lovely green eyes. You wanted those to be the last things you saw when you died.
“Who is it?” He asked, whispering like you were. You noticed his eyes start to well up with tears. Why?
You didn’t answer. You didn’t want him to feel guilt-tripped into loving you. You wanted to die without the most perfect boy feeling like he was responsible. Or maybe he wouldn’t care, and life would go on as normal for him. Either outcome pained your heart.
“Who is it?!” He asked, louder now. He put his hands on your bony shoulders and held on tightly. His eyes were wide with fear, an expression so deep, an expression you never wanted to see on his face. Your heart struck with pain.
“It’s you.” You whispered.
He was taken aback. His hands fell off your shoulder and instead to his sides.
“What?”
“It’s you.” You whispered again. If he really wanted to know, you’d tell him. You’d do just about anything he asked you to.
He stared at your for a moment, then his face broke out in a huge, flattery grin. Maybe he was glad you were dying.
He grabbed you in his arms and hugged you, his body still warm and nourished unlike yours. You widened your eyes in shock. What was this?
“W-what?” You asked, pushing yourself away from him with all of your remaining strength.
“I- I have hanahaki too.” He admitted, your heart sinking in your chest.
“I’ve had it for a little bit. Maybe a month. All Might told me to confess to you, so I was looking for you.” He sheepishly smiled.
You stepped back, shocked. Confess to you?
“W-what? Confess to me?”
“I like you, Y/n. And up until now, I thought you didn’t either.”
Your heart raced and pounded against your frail ribs, butterflies shooting through your stomach. Was this even real? The most perfect boy in the world liked you?
“Can I kiss you?” He asked, smiling and antsy. He set his hands on your shoulders and leaned in.
“W-wait!” You exclaimed, putting your hands on his chest to stop him, “I need to tell you something.”
He stepped back, staring at you and beginning to listen intently.
“I-I’m transgender. FtM. I’m a boy now, but I haven’t always been a boy? That’s a terrible way of wording it, but I’m a boy with a girls body,” You explained, “I-I understand if this changes things, it’s okay if you feel differently now.”
“It doesn’t change a thing.” He whispered, leaning back in.
When he finally kissed you, it was like everything else fell away. All that mattered was the heat of his lips against your own, the way he held you in his arms. You felt the weight of the sunflowers vanish from your stomach and lungs, and all of your previous muscle and body fat be restored. Your heart soared in your chest, begging and aching for this moment to never stop. Your lips matched perfectly, like two halves of a puzzle piece. This is what you had been missing your entire life. His hand reached up and rested gently at the nape of your neck, gently pressing your head closer to his. You wrapped your arms around his waist, tugging him closer to you. You felt his previous body mass be restored, like it had never been gone at all. He was so warm, so perfect. Everywhere he touched you sent shooting stars of excitement through you, resting in your heart. You loved what he did to you.
Eventually the kiss has to end, as you both needed air. He pulled away, holding onto your neck and pushing your foreheads together. You both smiled, giggling excitedly.
“What flower did you cough up?” He asked quietly.
“Sunflowers.” You answered.
“Thats my favorite flower.” He smiled.
“You?”
“I coughed up hibiscus.”
“Thats my favorite flower.”
He smiled, and gave you a quick kiss that only made you wish for more.
“You wanna come hang out in my dorm?” He asked in a whisper.
You nodded, unable to hide the grin that refused to leave your face. How could you stop it? After all, the most perfect boy in the world loved you back.
#mha#bnha#deku x male y/n#deku x reader#izuku midoriya#hanahaki#hanahaki disease#midoriya x ftm reader#deku x ftm reader#deku x ftm y/n#izuku x reader#izuku x male reader#izuku x ftm reader#izuku midoriya x male y/n#izuku midoriya x male reader#izuku midoriya x ftm reader
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Not a fan of happy endings myself. But as someone who is not really found of meak mcs, I was thinking why not make the whole class suffer in the end instead of us?
Like if we were using their obsession for our advantage and slowly manipulate them to su!cide/ tend our every need. They all have some trauma to press on anyways with right techniques of manipulation it would be a hell of a storyline.
i doubt even a highly manipulative reader would be able to coax all classmates into committing suicide. perhaps the emotionally vulnerable ones, sure, but not everyone. using them to tend to your needs is a different case. they'd be very willing to cater to all your needs, only if you could bear with their touchy tendencies.
but asking shoto to brew you some tea even when you know very well where he got his scar from? commenting momo's plans to be 'mediocre?' casually slipping out the fact that bakugou was technically the reason why all might's hero career ended?
oh, that's hot.
and the 'down-to-earth' members (iida, shoto, momo, bakugou) of the class abhorred that in spite of all that, they find still themselves not minding going down to their knees if you'd ask for it. they hated that they still look forward to every passive-aggressive derisive grin you show them or insults you nonchalantly throw, look forward to each degrading stomp and spit you give on their egos.
that kind of personality, though, might as well be a major turn-on for those used to abuse and/or degradation. izuku and kirishima for instance. izuku doesn't mind being demeaned by you, he doesn't mind anything as long as he has your attention. but he feels himself... stiffen, when he catches you insulting bakugou. it's as if you're doing that to avenge izuku. and oh god, bakugou's expression - it's priceless. you continue to deprecate the ash-blonde and izuku's breath accelerates a bit. eventually he decides to visit the restroom to quickly relieve himself.
kirishima didn't like how you constantly degraded him at first, letting him relive his weak self back before high school. it's mean, inconsiderate, and downright abusive (as if their affection to you wasn't abusive). but then there gradually blooms a feeling of giddiness whenever he hears insults coming from you. he doesn't find himself tolerating it, more like... enjoying it? the way you acknowledge his mistakes, his imperfections. those weren't insults, just harsh critiques. hell, it all the more stimulates him when they are actual insults, leaving a heavy feeling on his chest from a pain he - strangely enough - longs for. he knows he's not the best, he knows he's sometimes weak, knows that he's stagnant in progress. won't you punish him for it?
yeah, and you'd definitely tag along with monoma just to spite your classmates.
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I saw that ur requests were open so :) ( this is my first time requesting something) may I get head cannons for deku, tamaki and ur favorite mha characters when their s/o has abuse trauma but uses jokes and lies to themself to forget about it ( if this makes u uncomfortable I’m so sorry)
Very relatable, unfortunately… and this doesn't really make me uncomfortable, it's more like a chance air out my own feelings
~Hawks/Takami Keigo~
•His humor used to be quite self deprecating, but he has tried to learn not to use that kind of humor
•He hasn't had much success though
•He knows it's your way to cope, and he doesn't really want to stop you from doing that, but holy shit the stuff you say gets really dark sometimes
•Hawks knows what it's like and how it feels to be abused, but he has a very different approach to dealing with it
•But you lying to yourself, acting like nothing ever happened, and possibly even acting like that with your abusers, is something he dislikes very much
•Obviously if you aren't ready to deal with the trauma yet, he understands, but he does try to help you to the best of his ability and make you keep your distance to the people/person who abused you
~Midoriya Izuku~
•Honestly it kinda makes him uncomfortable that you joke about something so bad that happened to you
•He tries to comfort you and get you to talk about it, rather than you making a joke out of it
•It might even kinda get on your nerves sometimes, but he means well
•If you tell him not to pry or tell him to stop, he will, and he is sorry if he made you uncomfortable
•He isn't a therapist and he would encourage you to see one, because you sound like you would really need it
•Most of the time Midoriya is just at a loss on how to help you, and what he should do when you make jokes about your abuse or deny it completely
~Tamaki Amajiki~
•Tamaki is very anxious and it makes him very sad that you would joke about something like that
•Because you seem like you're not dealing with it well, or at all
•He wants to help but he doesn't know how to do that
•He tries to get you to talk to him, but you're always like, "nah, there's nothing wrong" even though you basically just made a joke about someone seriously hurting you
•I feel like Tamaki wouldn't really deal well with his inability to help you, but he tries his best anyway
#bnha#mha#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#midoriya izuku#tamaki amajiki#hawks#bnha hawks#mha hawks#takami keigo#bnha headcanons#mha headcanons#comfort#bnha fanfiction#mha fanfiction#abuse tw
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Selfish (Midoriya Izuku x Reader)
Warnings: light angst, fluff
Pairing: Midoriya Izuku x reader
A/N: reformatted later because i was too lazy to do it properly when i wrote this on my phone lol anyways enjoy this short drabble :))
Selflessness had always been a word, a trait, an idea associated with Midoriya Izuku. And he couldn't exactly disagree.
With warm sunny hues seeping through the blinds, melting the scars upon his bare skin into faint reminders of what he's survived, Izuku could afford to use the slow-passing minutes of dawn to do what he did best. Overthink.
It had happened to him before. Just not on this scale. Splitting seconds crawled one by one, at a snail's pace as Izuku watched the look of genuine fear on his face, the unspoken plea in his usually unyielding reds set something aflame, and before he could register the screams begging him to stop, the hungry fire licking at his skin, the shortening distance between him and the sludge villain, his limbs had developed a mind of their own. Crimson kicks crunching the charred gravel beneath his stumbling feet, lanky arms struggling to make a weapon out of his backpack, dilated stare focused only at his target.
It was like he was on autopilot
That was the first of many, many encounters when Izuku realized his body was not his own. It only became more apparent as he thrived as a pro-hero, restlessly climbing the ranks with unrivaled speed. It became blindingly evident how little of himself there was outside of heroics. As a kid he never really took notice of his lack of... identity, only ever casting his attention to that far-away dream of his. Only when it didn't seem so far, when he had breached the top ten and was on his merry way to occupy the number one spot like his mentor once did, did the curtains fall and he became increasingly aware of how empty he felt.
Izuku had come face to face with the fact that he was nothing if not his aspirations.
And he had to question whether this unmistakable selflessness of his was only due to the lack of his own self.
With a career as stable as a thunderstorm, a social life akin to a dwindling candlelight and an impending sense of inner crisis, it was only a matter of time before he broke.
But that's when you came into the picture.
He didn't really remember how you two met, as guilty as that makes him feel. Admittedly, that period in his life bled together into an ugly mess of aimless thinking and unending work hours, you didn't blame him in the slightest. All he knew was that you cracked away at his buzzing mind, until he finally let you in, let you guide him out of his self-deprecative routine.
Small questions, that's how it started. What's his favorite color, his favorite food, a hobby he enjoys. Mundane things he hadn't had the pleasure of basking in for too long. Droplets of summer rain that halted the overbearing heat his mind tended to conjure. Then out of nowhere it was a downpour.
And God did it feel oh, so refreshing.
You shifted in your sleep, turning on your side to look at him. Your hands seemed so delicate and miniscule compared to his own as they pawed at the sheets, seeking out his warmth. They finally found his muscled biscep, a tentative smile sleepily graced your face while your fingers brushed his decorated skin.
Izuku couldn't help but wrap you tighter in his embrace. He knew you had work early, he knew he should probably wake you up, but in that moment, being selfish never felt so good.
Taglist: @vannah-spotlight @sassi-sunflower @mypimpademia @her-majesty-kiara @solar3lunar @khionne @hbwtbsl
#midoriya izuku x reader#midoriya x reader#deku x reader#izuku midoriya x reader#izuku midoriya#midoriya#bnha midoriya#midoriya imagine#midoriya fluff
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I love the way you write about this story and these characters, it's just so wonderful.
Other than your own meta, who else do you recommend? Any fanfics? What about video essays? I trust your opinions 🙇
There is no one who will agree with me 100% on everything, and no one will write or talk about something in the exact same way as another person. I'm sure you realize that.
I see eye-to-eye with @siflshonen on most everything in MHA, and I enjoy the different ways we often approach expressing similar opinions. @makeste has been on break from the manga as of late, but I vibe with her old metas.
@greenhappyseed @class1akids @transhawks write often about sections of the MHA story I am less inclined to examine as closely, and I regularly consider or even defer to their opinions in those areas (All Might-, Todoroki family-, and Hawks/LoV-focused perspectives).
On YouTube, Semblance of Sanity have the takes I agree the most with or find the most interesting. Next would be A Goodwin TV's takes. Blind Wave (reactions on their website) and K&K Anime have reactions and some discussions that I enjoy as well. I'm not really into any video essayists at the moment, though I think there is a lot of potential in the medium itself for good discussion. It's just harder to produce a video in a reasonable amount of time when writing and screenshots get the job done just as well, and most of the essayists I've seen have a more...power-scaling focus that I rarely agree with. (Yes, I have power-scaling opinions based in meta, and they're correct.)
Fanfics are a different beast. A lot of writers lean heavily on western perspectives, which I think is entirely valid to do for whatever type of story you're trying to write. For me personally, a lot of western-based tropes I often see in fanfic just don't mesh as well with canon-focused MHA stories, and many characters end up either out-of-character or at best something like their anime-only filler episode selves. Fanfic is often an avenue of self-exploration, and that means many good stories will reflect the writer's personal experiences more than anything. Those are enjoyable to read, but they don't scratch my itch for more content that explores the canon characterization even in shipping fics. And yes, I guess this is me being a half-hearted snob. There are just some things no one will bat an eye at that I will cringe reading merely because I know Japanese social mores a tiny bit better than most westerners (for example, I very much doubt canon Katsuki would ever get a tattoo, let alone Izuku). I never expect writers to know these things, but I can't help but raise an eyebrow whenever they come up.
I Want What I Don't Deserve (hi sifl, I'm plugging you again!) actually scratches the itch for me. Even in the moments where the author may be inserting their personal experiences or adding more depth to characters that isn't present in the manga, all these author additions make sense with the characters as they present in canon. I whole-heartedly recommend this story to Bakugou fans, Todoroki family fans, and even BakuDeku fans (there is a poetically tragic element to their relationship--though it is not the primary "ship" in the fic--and I think the fandom could use more of this specific take to spice up the ship). Plus Katsuki's opportunities for narration strike the perfect balance of self-deprecation, arrogance, teenage flippancy, and hilarity to keep me entertained for literal months now. (Fuck, just read everything by sifl, because their works reflect the care and craft they jam-pack into everything they write. Do it!)
I don't have many fics I'm currently reading or following. I feel like there was a period a few years ago when I really enjoyed the MHA fanfic world, but lately it's been hard to find anything that grabs me. I could probably use more recommendations myself.
This got way longer than I expected. Oops.
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worship the king //.o1 // shigaraki tomura x female!reader
summary: after the soul crushing realization that you're not meant to be the Hero you've spent your life training to be, you hunt down the most indiscriminate killer you know: Dabi. his man-child of a leader being there only makes the task easier, right?
too bad Shigaraki has a knack for seeing things in others they don't see themselves.
wc: 3,312
playlist: here!
rated: M for dark and mature themes; future lewd
tw: suicidal ideation (seriously don't read if you're in a bad mindset this probs won't help), depression, toxic thoughts, manipulation, the start of a v dependent, idolizing relationship ie "worship" in all definitions of the word haha. Shigs taking advantage of a mentally vulnerable hero basically; dead dove do not eat for that reason.
a/n: this is something I wrote almost year ago now, when I first fell head over heels for Shigs and really felt like bnha was saving me from insanity haha. I have 15 pages of notes for this fic, but for now, for the King's birthday, this is my thank you to him and a year of loving Shigaraki Tomura <3 also to the xreader community for being my gateway into every fandom that takes over my life haha.
will be posted to ao3 later
You stand on a cracked, littered rooftop, sullenly looking over the calamity you figured would be destroying the lives of every day, happily unaware citizens tonight. A slight sigh of relief leaves your chewed-to-hell lips, hidden to your own addled mind but glaringly apparent to any of your fellow heroes who’d commented on your state of mind the past few months.
You appreciated their care, you really did—for all the surface level care it could give, that is. It wasn’t their fault they couldn’t understand. They were simply more Heroic than you, official capital and all. More driven, stronger, faster… But you’ve been doing the absolute best you can, and you were sure of that. Days–weeks months?–of harshly honest self speculation assured you of your failures and of the fact that, simply put, you weren’t cut out for shouldering multitudes of lives every time you stepped out your door. Heroism didn’t just end when you took off your costume; no, it was an ideology that should be ingrained into the soul of the costume wearer, and you’d come to the jarring conclusion that, after all your special training, you just weren’t up to snuff.
You couldn’t even save yourself from your own demons. How the hell were you supposed to save those more deserving of life if you couldn’t cope with your own shit?
A small, condescending snort leaves your nostrils as you observe the blue flames engulfing the area below you. Fucking worthless. What was the point, then? Hours of support Hero's work on your items, costume—wasted. The countless words of love and support from friends and family. Ha. Your eyes track the small movements of the current chaos’ perpetrators with a keenness you've found twisted comfort in recently. A familiar, all encompassing fixation gears up that brings you out of the cloud of self-doubt, hate, and deprecation that was so, so wrong to feel as a Pro-Hero in today’s society. In this bubble there's a solution, so it's okay. You let out a numbing breath.
Maybe you could give the Villains +1 morality in the eyes of whatever twisted being rested on their laurels, idly watching as you drive yourself insane.
A swift gust of wind knocks the empty cans and bottles from their peaceful resting places as you leave your perch, descending into the empty alley below to begin your last stand against yourself. Resolute and heavy steps echo in the widened, deserted streets of the city you vowed to protect—a small, still aware part of you thankful it’s so late at night that most would be sleeping. Your targets (saviors?) usually moved when they would make the most social impact, but you’d been tracking a certain member that didn’t seem to adhere to their strict schedule.
Whoever they were behind the obvious moniker, they seemed to kill liberally. It should be easy. You take a numbing breath.
The stench of burning flesh and ash is suddenly all too pungent, assaulting your senses enough to kick your mind into another, more logical plane and question how stupid you’re being. How disappointed everyone who knew you would be. Izuku and Hitoshi, especially, had been trying their hardest to devote extra time to you recently, you knew that—fuck, how selfish were you to bring their attention away from a goal they’d fought so hard to achieve?
The flames are smoldering char on concrete when you arrive at the end of another alleyway, just as dirty as the one you’d come from… But the incineration just seemed to have cleansed the way of its trash. You nearly sigh again in morbid relief when you see two men still standing there in the aftermath. You can see from behind that the man you’ve been tracking, Dabi, still has his left arm extended, as if relishing the memory of his flames destroying the ones he deemed unworthy.
Hands in your hero costume’s pockets, you steel yourself in your usual Hero emotions: indignation, conviction, disgust at the idea of them feeling they had a right to do anything going against the grain of the society you were indoctrinated into. You clear your throat with the last of your practiced confidence, bringing the sights of the two Villains to your own frame shadowed by the bright street lamp at your back.
“You two aren’t planning on getting away with this, are you?”
Your simple, deadpan drawl has both men scoffing to themselves and sharing a look of exasperation and annoyance. They clearly want nothing more than to be done with whatever the hell they were doing; your gaze sharpens in acknowledgment while their own take note of your hero costume. This is it. This is really it. You’ve done it. Is it really what you want?
Your eyes ice over, hardening to protect your vulnerabilities when they meet those of the second man’s own carmine flecks, so unflinching and so, so bored from behind his trademark hand.
Yeah. This is it.
Resignation freezing the rest of your visage and nothing left to say, you dash forward with simple physical speed, locking onto the Villain you recognize as the leader of the League of Villains himself. Sure, Dabi was a proven relentless killer, but you figure if you go after the leader himself there would be even less hesitation or time to think on either side. They were both reportedly unflinching, ruthless, uncaring and absolutely evil, but Shigaraki’s devilishness was practically beaten into you at this point. He was the obvious candidate, the oddness of his presence meaningless yet welcome at this point.
Your eyes never leave his as you take those last three lunging leaps, your arm cocked back in a hopeful show of some impressive power you might possess, in a display grand enough to paint yourself as a threat if not at the very least an annoyance.
Blue flames lick at the back of your costume. You’d somehow been faster than Dabi’s flames, which made no sense at all—you weren’t fast in any capacity if you were to judge yourself. It must’ve been a misfire. Lucky you’ve targeted the faster acting Villain.
Something distinctly odd flashes in his previously disinterested eye as you rush him, your Quirk barely powered yet still reflecting in his observation as you aim for the mask. Your own, in contradictory spite, slows as your mind races, brushing the hand enough to feel the inexplicitly soft and leathery texture, knocking it clean off the face of the man you’d targeted. Maybe it's the adrenaline, maybe it's the anticipation of the end, but you don’t feel anything near what you thought you’d feel when his living hand grazes your outstretched arm. If anything, it feels like an angry wasp had come at your elbow in some sort of misguided revenge attempt. Bearable.
Fucking livable.
You skid to a shaky stop feet behind them, your glare going to the small hole in your costume’s arm where he’d made the briefest of contact. The skin had only begun to crack and decay from a central point; nothing near the scale and intensity you’d been warned about by your superiors and peers. What the fuck gives?
A desperate rage threatens to erupt at the lack of damage. You feel cheated. Your eyes shift from the minimal damage to the apprehensive yet notably curious eyes of your chosen euthanasist. Was he just not taking you seriously? You didn’t blame him, but…
“I thought the League was the best of the best?” The sting in your arm is mockingly there and you scoff, barely hiding your indignation at his unfulfillment of the role you’d forced upon him. You take it and use it to fuel the crumbling foundation of your resolve, ashing it to the ground yourself and focus on the slightly slumped figure topped with white-blue hair.
His eyes are now magnetized and piercing, never wavering from your own, adding to your rage and confusion. Just what is he getting at, looking straight at you in the fucked up state you’re in and just–just fucking seeing–?! You aren’t looking for pity, fuck all if it's from the person you’ve deemed would have the balls you didn’t to end this shitty nightmare you live in. With a primal, anguished and utterly guttural scream you dash forward once more towards Shigaraki Tomura, hand erupting in a more accurate show of your true power.
Once again, he simply guides your attack away from him into empty space, this time with a deft shove of his index finger. Silent and calculating. You stumble on your feet as you land, ignoring the insulting sting, and turn to face them at a pace you know isn’t up to Hero standards but unable to even fake it anymore. Your eyes, though.
They fucking call to him.
How could he dust you? A Pro-Hero, coming at him alone, a deadly ally at his side, with what he knew from his research to be nowhere near their quirk’s power and potential?
Nevermind the look in your eyes he’d recognized immediately—this Hero was asking to be killed. Cracked lips twitch to grin at the situation. His mind works at full throttle to balance the possibilities.
“Heh…” The small breath leaves him, a smirk winning out and pulling at already taught skin, “You’re looking to die, aren’t you, Hero?”
Your brows furrow in… Fuck, you can’t identify your feelings at this point–they shouldn’t matter–they’d become obsolete the moment you took a swing at the supposedly impulsive and irrational Villain in charge. All you can feel is the overwhelming sense of weight, of pressure, of absolute and total CHAOS destroying any semblance of unity you’d pulled together to end this.
“What the fuck does that matter to you, Villain?!” Your glare is full of a rawness you can’t recognize, let alone mask, “Fucking fight me or die!”
His smirk, now fully on display, stretches to the smuggest of smiles as he takes his experimental first steps forward, casually retrieving the hit hand and placing it safely in his trench coat pocket. You weren’t immediately attacking him—hell, you weren’t even defending yourself! You’d only be more obvious if you’d delivered yourself to his doorstep tied in a bright, blood-red ribbon labeled “do what you want, I don’t care anymore!” It made his blood simmer, his skin itch in excitement at all the optional routes opened up before him.
Quickly, too quickly to deploy your defense {even if you wanted to}, he’s in your face and encircling your neck in a four fingered grasp. Your eyes vaguely mark Dabi looking on with a detached interest, and you can’t help but mirror his lack of understanding—your emotions and thoughts unfortunately too far past controllable to be hidden behind the usual Heroics.
“You could still serve a purpose, you know.”
Narrowed (e/c) eyes meet piercing, analytical rubies set to freeze and crumble enemies. You have no answer to that, none at all—if you hadn’t come across another anything while you’d been searching in earnest, how could it be tossed into your lap from the hands of a Villain? Your clear disbelief doesn’t deter him in the slightest. It only gives him the subtle signals he needs to ensure a dedicated new member of his team. This situation could only go well for him and the League, if he plays it right, and he’s thankful Dabi knows when to shut the hell up and take the back seat when he truly should.
He’s never seen Shigaraki’s version of recruitment before. After Dabi's climate destroying display, he could use a lesson.
On the edge though this Hero is, the line is thin and the touch needed is delicate and calculated.
“You can make a real difference in this rotten world,” Shigaraki slowly lowers his defensive arm and loosens his grip on your neck, conveying his intentions to calm you. He notices this strikes an especially sore nerve that you’re too unhinged to recognize. You’re taken over by your emotions, unable to distinguish that you’ve offered your weaknesses to your enemy on a silver platter. Disgusted rage he’s now certain is self-focused meets him, only bringing him a step closer to your frozen and highly panicked figure. His free fingers fidgets on the clammy skin of your neck, tapping a pattern across your throbbing pulse, expectant and soft while the other stays loosely, carefully, against your clavicle.
It's constant.
It's… calming?
No, it's fucking overwhelming and uncomfortable and— As if your body’s acting on the last vestiges of your studies, you struggle in his grasp and pull your dominate arm back, channeling all your sadness and panic you’d been unable to expel into the attack you hoped would just fucking end this fucking end this it’s done—
Another four fingered grip captures your wrist, directing your power away from anything important and only ruffling Dabi’s clothes as he watches on. You choke on a cry, near your mask’s end with Shigaraki’s unexpected patience. You’d been told this was nothing more than a spoiled, raging, calloused young man entirely unable to connect with any feelings other than his own selfish need to destroy all Heroes he came in contact with. The only conclusion your racing mind can come to is that he doesn’t even view you as a Hero worth destroying. Thick and torrid tears rush from your eyes, betraying your need to be recognized and being denied that luxury in your final moments.
“I can’t even get what I need from you fuckfaces—!” Your cry rings out, eyes shutting tightly, shaking with the force of your emotions finally finding the breaking point they need to crash through into the real world, “What the fuck can I do to make a fucking difference?!”
Shigaraki pauses to assess your sobbing. You’ve all but folded into yourself; you would’ve disintegrated against his hold on your neck if he hadn’t been paying attention. No… he sees you. He sees you. His fingered grip on your neck slides up to force your head to follow, meeting his sure gaze. You’re lost. You’re anxiously grasping at anything you can to stop the burning, itching need to destroy your own mind… And he gets that. He knows what it took to hook him tightly into his own mindset. He knows of seeing a seemingly impossible goal set before him, of feeling unworthy and needing to prove himself to his peers and himself. If anyone could reshape you... it would be him. If anyone were to reshape you... it should be him.
“It isn’t fair, is it…?” He starts slowly, voice dripping with cooing understanding, gauging your expressions and body, “You work so hard to be what others want you to be… And never feel enough, even when you put your all into it.” Your whole being shudders at his words, breaking down and melting into the pressure of your expectations for yourself. You choke on another messy sob, tears blinding you, snot nearly reaching your lips, a trail of drool unknowingly slipping from the corner of your grimacing lips.
“We’d never expect more than you can give, you know,” He all but whispers into your ear, his words echoing with staying power. You miss the tiniest bit of excitement he lets slip into his tone at the thought of corrupting a fairly strong Hero to his cause with mere psychological one-upmanship. The power over your entire existence is an intoxicating prize and he’s not about to let go of it if he can help it.
A sad cross between a whimper and a cry escapes you as you crumble even more into a hold you’d only come to for annihilation. Why wasn’t he killing you? Why weren’t you dead? You’d wanted to die, needed to just stop everything and just—just STOP, finally, just stop. He was a hardened criminal with no need for heroes, what the hell kind of use did he see in you? You still the tiniest bit. You just need a use, a tangible use, is that what you’ve been missing? A clear direction set before you by an overwhelmingly liberating, intelligent, capable force… Could he see it through all the absolute shit you covered yourself in?
A tentative spark lights the furthest parts of you as you finally meet his confident and knowing gaze. Fuck if you don’t feel seen for the first time in your life, finally seen and accepted for the absolute mess you see yourself as. The conflicting, philosophical doubts you’ve had about Heroism, and your own heroics in the existential race you call a life, find a peaceful place in Shigaraki Tomura’s vision.
It's an alien calm, a powerful sedative on your mind, leading you to melt into his look—telling him all he needed to know and more. The grin he sports widens and his eyes shift to give a silent command to Dabi, still (surprisingly) observing quietly, before changing your life indefinitely, “Follow me, little hero. You'll never be lost again.”
A deep, swirling purple warp gate you’d only seen in footage appears at the entrance to the alleyway.
The loose grip on your neck finally leaves completely, giving you ample room to escape up and out across the rooftops. You’re frozen in your battling thoughts at the suddenly very real decision in front of you.
You knew you weren’t good enough to be a Hero. You’d been struggling with the core beliefs on what the word even meant, if the world you’d been taught was even so black and white. Did you even want to die or did you just need someone to come and give you a purpose, some great refocusing direction? Someone to swoop in, recognize and acknowledge your pain before wiping it away and giving you something definite to live for? You knew you couldn’t make it as a Hero. You were nothing in that world. But maybe you could make that nothing existence, doomed to the weaker, better…?
Eyes nearly blinded before blinking down more streams of tears, you sniffle and take a tentative step towards the man looming tall over you, an umbrella shielding you from a brightness you couldn’t stand to be seen in. You harshly wipe your falling tears to watch Dabi walk swiftly into the portal, an unlit cigarette of some sort dangling from his patterned lips. Shigaraki steps to it much slower. He stops before he reaches it, twisting subtly to look at you from over his shoulder. He shouldn’t have to say anything more for you to follow, if his assumptions are correct—
They are.
Your first steps are slow but pick up speed quickly, feet nearly throwing you into his right side, at the mouth of the portal to a place described by your thoughts as no return. His eyes widen in delight, a manic grin following as he places the fingers of his left hand onto your head in a semblance of comfort. More than he ever got. His right arm wraps confidently around your waist, absurdly consoling to your rapidly evolving morals and needs.
It allows you to let it all go, though. It tells you someone more capable, more prepared is there. That he sees you and is keeping you alive because you’re useful to him. You can’t seem to care why when the overwhelming realization that such a powerful man saw you as you were, truly were, and still found a profound use for you in a world you were dying in takes a strong hold. You’re practically weightless as he guides you into the inky blackness of his caretaker’s portal, mind clicking into place and recognizing the distinct choice you’re making with a calm acceptance of this development in your life.
You were a useless hero. Perhaps this is your chance to prove you could make a difference to someone as a villain.
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a/n: thanks so much for reading!! :) hope you enjoyed~ happy birthday, Shigster! maann I wish he'd take me away ;w; drop of a hat, I'm gone lol. the ultimate escapism... yandere!Shigaraki! xD annyway, I hope you have a wonderful day~ <3
#shigaraki tomura x femaie!reader#shigaraki x reader#tw sucidal ideation#tw depression#tw manipulation
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“unprepared”
midoriya izuku x reader
x gender neutral reader
a/n: needed the creative juices to get flowing so i can try my best to update. been in love with genshin. kaeya and lisa i am in love with you. your quirk is not specified!!
q/n = quirk name
contains kissing, whole lotta fluff shit, emotions, loving midoriya hour!!!
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There were many things Izuku was and unprepared was rarely one of them. He was always at least 3 steps ahead. That is until he got with you.
He was unprepared from the first day he met you. Starry eyes gazing upon your curly hair and s/c skin that looked more vibrant under the sun. He was unprepared to even hear your lips part to utter an introduction to him. To hear you greet him every morning or chirp his name through the phone. He was even more unprepared to fall in love with you.
He was unprepared for you to become his significant other. Someone who’s supposed to love and care for him and was unprepared when you genuinely wanted to be him. He wouldn’t lie about it. He isn’t the most confident person you can meet. The years of bullying he faced ever since Bakugo manifested a quirk and he didn’t make his confidence take massive blows. Bakugo’s quirk included. He was surprised when you were so adamant on hyping him up every second you could and the fact you didn’t let him become self-deprecating.
“I-It wasn’t that great, Y/N. I’ve done better and I feel like I’ve failed others like usual.” Midoriya stuttered as he looked at his scarred hands. The same hands that were once smooth were covered in what he called his mistakes. You gently grabbed his chin and tilted his head up so you could see his emerald eyes that always had that child-like glimmer of wonder and curiosity in them. “All that matters is that you did your best in the current moment. As a hero, you aren’t always going to be able to do things how you wish you could. The only thing that makes is if you put as much effort and passion into this. Don’t belittle your efforts, Izu. You amaze everyone. Me included. You try your best to handle these battles even though you’re still learning how to control your quirk.” You said softly as you looked into his eyes. You moved your hand to gently hold his cheek. You watched as his eyes glossed over, bottom lip slightly quivering. He leaned into your touch as he gently held your wrist.
“That’s admirable, Izuku. You win some and lose some. Just know I’ll always be here you be your little cheerleader. Know that there’s always going to be someone out there who’s proud of you no matter what you do.” You said, wiping a stray tear from his cheek with your thumb and pressing a kiss to his forehead
He truly wasn’t prepared for your constant gestures of love and affection. From the surprise teasing kisses.
You tapped his shoulder. Midoriya hummed and looked up from his homework to be met with your lips pressed against his. He slightly gasped before his eyes fluttered close, face heating up. Just as he was about to cup your cheek, you pulled away, causing him to slightly huff from the lost of contact. “What was that for?” He mumbled with a furrowed pout. You cheekily smiled before patting his cheek. “Just because.” You said, turning back to look down at your worksheet. Purposely ignoring the slight pout on Midoriya’s face before he quickly huffed, now distracted from his homework.
To the meaningful kisses during late nights where you would just let him rant while you helped combed out the daily tangles from his curly hair.
“And it’s just hard with all this stress on me.” He mumbled, wincing at the feeling of you combing out his tangled ends. “Sorry Zuzu— But I understand. Well, not how you exactly feel but I understand what you mean.” You said, softly as you sprayed some leave in conditioner in his hair. “No, no, I get it. I just wish I didn’t have all this pressure on me sometimes. But it’s mandatory especially with All Might trusting me, so I’ll just have to work harder.” Midoriya said, making you furrow your eyebrows. “Anht. Izuku, you deserve a break.” You said. He turned to look back at you as if you had just told him, you didn’t really like All Might. (Although, that statement was true you would never tell him that. It’s a secret you’d take to the grave. You had a small personal vendetta against the abnormally sickly tall man that could barely last a couple minutes without hacking up blood into a handkerchief.)
“Take a break? B-But I can—“
“Says who? Yeah you may be in the hero course, have a powerful quirk, and All Might of all people being your mentor. But, you still need a break. We’re all teens. We need to have fun and let loose.”
“I....”
“So after this I’m twisting your hair up, putting on your bonnet, and we’re gonna have a free day tomorrow.”
“Baby I appreciate it but—“ You cut him off. “I never said this was an offer. We’re doing it. Tomorrow’s Saturday and you need the break more than anyone. You always push yourself past your limits and go above and beyond. As a hero, you can’t always work to make sure everyone’s safe but yourself. You need to be selfish and here’s one of the times.” You said, cupping his cheek. His bottom lip quivered as he quickly sat up on his knees to press a kiss against your plush lips. He held onto your knees to push the kiss deeper. You only dropped the comb and slid your arms around his neck. He smiled against your lips and stood up. You pulled him down on the bed and lightly chuckled. He smiled wider and rested his forehead against yours, ignoring the tears that pricked his eyes from how loved he felt.
He was unprepared when you leaped into battle immediately, taking a hit that was meant for him.
Your eyes widened as you looked over at Izuku who was currently giving his all, using OFA against a villain. You ran as fast as you could, determined to protect him as you noticed something he didn’t. The villain had an extra move up their sleeve that would be a painful hit on Izuku. It would take longer for him to heal in the current vulnerable state he was already in. He didn’t deserve to be the main target majority of the time he was just trying to get an education. Everyone else were already working hard to take down the remaining villains and you’d be damned if you let Izuku end up in the hospital again. Activating q/n, using it to your advantage, you propelled yourself to yank an unsuspecting Izuku out of the way. Two different yelps were let out.
Your yelp of pain as the villain’s powered up fist collided against your side, sending you tumbling back and Izuku’s yelp of surprise as he had stumbled back from the force you have previously used to pull him back. He quickly snapped out his confused state to make a mad dash towards your body that was hunched over, cradling your side. He slid on his knees, not caring if he scuffed them up, and gently held you. “Baby. Baby, hey hey, open your eyes.” He exclaimed, panicked. You winced as you pried one eye open. “’zuku?” You grunted out. “W-We’re- I’m gonna move you out of here.” He said as he gently scooped you up in his arms. “B-But you have to fig-” You were interrupted by his stern voice. “You’re more important!” He exclaimed before running off, using OFA to make himself quicker.
The quick and short trip to your safety went by in a blur as you faded in and out due to the immense pain you felt in your side. You were soon laid down against something firm. You didn’t bother to even look as it hurt to voice any snarky comebacks you had. “L-Let me see.” Izuku voiced out, shakily. “Huh?” You winced. “Let me see how bad it is. May I?” He said, not even looking anywhere but your side. You only nodded as you felt his rough hands delicately remove your hero suit as if he was unboxing a glass figurine. His breath hitched as he looked at the blooming bruise on your side that was almost too painful for him to look at. “W-Why would you take that hit for me?” He whimpered as he lightly grazed his gloved fingers across the bruise so lightly it was like he never even touched it in the first place.
“Because I hate how much you go to the hospital-” You hissed as you slowly adjusted yourself. “-just for using your quirk so much. If you had taken that hit, it would’ve much worse for you. You didn’t even notice that move before I stepped in. I want to protect you as much as you protect me.” You mumbled. Izuku’s casted a shadow over his eyes as he let your words soak in. You watched as green lightning crackled around him. “I’ll get someone to watch you. I’m gonna go get that villain.” He said as he leaned in to press a kiss upon your lips. You kissed back as much as the pain in your side let you. He pulled back and you caressed his cheek. “Give em hell, Zuku. Go beat their ass for me.” You said before he nodded and ran off. He was filled with rage as he ran back into the field. He was a man on a mission and nobody was get in his way. Unless, they wanted to catch his fists. Literally.
He was unprepared for the stupid little things you’d whisper late at night just to get an amusing reaction out of him.
“You know, All Might’s kinda hot.” You whispered, earning a bewildered snort from Izuku. “I’m sorry, what?” He whisper shouted as he shot up to look at you. You snickered behind your hand as you slowly sat up. “I’m joking, Zu!” You giggled out. He groaned and grabbed a pillow to gently hit you in the face with. “That’s gross!” He whined. “What you telling me you never went on Wattpad and searched up All Might x Readers?” You whispered, deadpanned. Izuku went silent as he looked away. “Wait you deadass?” You exclaimed. He shushed you as he wacked you in the face with the pillow. You started laughing as he whisper shouted. “Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!” He repeated as he kept hitting you with the pillow.
But, he was fully prepared to love you unconditionally.
He kneeled down, opening a small black box, revealing the ring you always stared at with sparkling eyes. “Will you marry me?” He said as he looked up at you with watery eyes.
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