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hidingoutbackstage · 2 months

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Okay I’m STILL procrastinating watching s15 bc I’m SCARED so here’s my extremely biased ratings/opinions on the episodes of s14 to help me procrastinate (episodes which are multiple parts of a single story will be condensed into one slot)

Room Zero: SO cute and good, I LOVED the animation style, it was simple and short but really well done with great colors, fun alien designs, and fluid animation, and I just like seeing the guys go on missions like that. It's a shame that the animated show never got picked up bc I would've adored seeing more of it. 10/10

From Stumbled Beginnings: Very cute and funny origin story for Simmons and Grif, and I love that they were p much always together since they enlisted lmao makes their dynamic rlly good and the humor actually got a couple laughs out of me. 8/10

Fifty Shades of Red: Sarge's humor never quite landed with me like is has for some people (my boyfriend lmao I literally have to pause episodes sometimes so he can stop laughing. Anyway) but it was a very humorous and in character origin for him as well. 5/10

Why They’re Here: Less interesting than the previous two, obviously just meant to fill in plot "holes" and to also show us the origins of the other characters. Also I am completely ignoring that one line from Tucker in the interview, just gonna chalk it up to the "edgy" humor it does not exist to me. 4/10

The Brick Gulch Chronicles: WONDERFUL stop motion, very fun and cute and entertaining, very wholesome and still in the vibe with what the show itself is. I appreciate the willingness to do stop motion for most of it. 10/10

Red Army Unit FH57’s Adventure: It was kinda interesting and kinda funny but I found myself kinda tuning it out cuz it just felt kinda whatever. The combo of the different animation styles was cool though and I thought the ship misunderstanding them was funny. 5/10

Locus and Felix: Okay I'm gonna be a black sheep for a second and say that I rlly don't care that much about Locus and Felix. I don't think Felix is a secretly deep sadboi whom I'm gonna spend an unnecessary amount of time thinking about, I don't think Locus as secretly good all along, and I don't care that much about their partnership and what they were like before Chorus. That being said, the animation here is absolutely gorgeous, this is probably my favorite animated story in the whole season, it looks awesome. The plot is nothing special but who cares like I said it's beautiful, 6/10

Fight the Good Fight!: VERY funny and well-executed propaganda video, short and sweet and nothing more to it. It does its job. 5/10

Meta vs. Carolina: Dawn of Awesome: Another one I really don't care for because literally everything leading UP to the fight between Meta and Carolina is a waste of time. Maybe some people really care about their weapons and stats, but I don't. And even then, you kinda know Carolina is gonna win the fight, the question is just how. 4/10

Grey vs. Gray: I don't know or care about the Game Grumps and the entire thing felt like a short gag that went on for way too long with a predictable ending. 2/10

Caboose's Guide to Making Friends: Again, ADORABLE art style and very cute having a story be told from Caboose's perspective. 7/10

Head Cannon: Kinda funny I guess. I wish we'd gotten it spread out more equally among the heads Omega jumped into. Ik he didn't spend equal time in there but who cares. Whatever, still funny. 5/10

Get Bent: I LAUGHED PROBABLY THE HARDEST AT THIS ONE AND THAT'S MOSTLY BC OF LESBIAN DONUT IT CAUGHT ME OFF GUARD AND IT WAS HILARIOUS (also hello, bisexual church?) 9/10

Red vs. Blue: The Musical: it was fine. it was creative. The dancing was well animated. Enjoyable. 5/10

Mr. Red vs. Mr. Blue: I haven't seen Reservoir Dogs but Kaikaina was in this which automatically boosts it to a 8/10 (I also like that they have movie nights it's cute)

RvB Throwdown: Fine but mostly forgettable. 3/10

The Triplets Story: REALLY interesting concept (y'all know I love the freelancers) that felt like it dragged on too long and only gave Ohio something to do. 4/10

Immersion: The Warthog Flip: I loved the costumes and the actual Warthog and it got a couple laughs out of me. 5/10

Red vs. Blue vs. Rooster Teeth: This was made for the fans/themselves. As someone who is neither, none of it was funny and I just kinda waited for it to be over. At least the animation of the armor irl looked rlly good

#sid rants #sid watches #rvb

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absolutely-not-my-main-blog · 10 months

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Aye I actually got to watch the episode tonight

Random 16x07 Notes I took while watching before scrolling my dash:

-Mac playing pool just like he plays hockey and bowls I see <3 something something putting too much power/pressure on things/being too forceful when you gotta guide the hockey puck like a little bowl of cream, or throw the bowling ball with gentle precision and finesse... something something previous years him putting too much pressure/force on Dennis but now...

-On a less conspiracy take note, I rewatched Mac’s Big Break recently and I find it fun how Charlie is just like better and knows more about sports and stuff like that and tells Mac what he has to do to play better. Also plays into this season’s theme of Charlie recurringly being the straight man, able to point out and notice things others don’t, but still being a bit of a helpless observer for the most part.

-Great Sharp title cut today, I should make a list of all the best ones/ones with best timing, I know one of the most iconic will always be Frank Sets Sweet Dee on Fire.

-The cackles and Charlie trying to mirror them <3 love that

-The horror sound effects when the McPoyles turn around and in the next few scenes are on point.

-Following that “Too many ideas, just stick with one” theme again just like in Celebrity Booze... interesting, very interesting. And what’s the main uniting idea that they want to stick it out with huh 👀 (or is it about the blend of ideas, the chili the cheese the fries.)

-Mac touches Den’s arm so much in this ep, they’re both very touchy, it’s nice to see them comfortable with that again.

-First time I’ve been able to watch the rip with commercials, Danny Devito Jersey Mike’s jump scare, how can I connect this to sunny he’s hiding behind the painting with the eyes cut out just like Dennis was in s15 and—*Jersey Mike himself drags me away*

-Dennis saying “it’s too sexually charged” while side eyeing Mac right next to him in frame like that, I don’t even need to comment

-Let’s go, Frank, slow and steady wins the race... slow like the structure, like 16 years wait.

-Artemis saying “hoor” like Frank does, okay, work it.

-Really interesting to me Charlie gets a strike without even needing to focus, something I wanted to say there but I don’t remember. We saw everyone else with their initial strategy and then psychologically affected to fail though and I wish we got to see Dennis in that context as well?

-Mac’s finesse ramble 🤝 Anya in Buffy “I have finesse coming out of my bottom!”

-“Just play the game and we’re gonna win, don’t spin, don’t do it.” This line I like because it feels very much in line with I’ve always been Dennis and you’re you you’ve always been you, and big mo again and just play the game and we’re gonna win, don’t spin, don’t do it, just be yourself, just be, just play.

-I can’t believe they cut off my man on his scream, the injustice! Anyway, gonna need more angst and pain from him, stat.

-Lick

-omg the McPoyle bowling scene was so much better than I expected, that was so funny. Also, Liam wants Dennis so bad.

-They should have trash twin telepathy stuff in this show more, let’s goo, they’re in each other’s heads, they’ve never been apart almost their whole life, we need Dee to figure out how to mess with Dennis’ head next.

-The cgi pin faces will haunt me, they also crashed my computer multiple times like the ep simply would not play beyond that scene.

———

Bonus: DTAMHD trailer thoughts

-Dennis having a new car when the old one is so inherently tied to his identity/the past, iCarly interesting.jpeg, trying to reconcile the new with the old and him not having control of it, a theme of control this season, who is in control? Charlie or Frank in the world of business? Dennis as Johnny? Aaron or Bryan... is it all an act? Is Mac...?

-Putting things under pressure so they become diamonds subplot to putting Dennis under pressure, I see you, I see you.

#iasip #it’s always sunny in philadelphia #text #sunny sweet 16 #s16 spoilers #16x07 #iasip spoilers #the gang goes bowling #anmmbposts

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badnew2005 · 11 months

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rehashing this post from right before s15 like. hm !!!!! first half of the post died like hoodie gate and dennis in macs room turned to be Nothing. i’m still maintaining they fucked over quarantine (SINGING HAPPY SILLY LITTLE COUNTRY LOVE SONGS ?????? country mac vs mac) but. dennis is still emotionally in north dakota. he’s still fight or flight. he’s learnt he can’t survive without mac without the gang and still had to come crawling back to philly But he’s not emotionally back. he’s not accepted he’s back and this is Who He Is. that he couldn’t survive as someone else once again. he’s terrified mac and the gang can see through him. he still wants to run. the gang go on holiday. go where PURPLE ??? that’s not a place !!! vocal stim of all time. they go to ireland back to their Roots. they’re an Irish bar. macs so aggressively american irish. let’s tell him he’s dutch. to shut him up. need to confuse him, spin him around, give him a different focus other than Me.

mac and dennis barely interact in ireland. dennis’ obsession with authenticity almost killing him. he’s trying so hard to be Real to be a Real Person. not Himself of course. someone real here. s14 health scare dennis NOT vigilant about covid ???? REFUSING to admit he had it. because it wasn’t authentic. wasn’t Real. because he spent 2020 hiding away with mac, slowly falling back into old routines, back in love back to being see through. fuck. that’s Not what ireland was for. dennis being the one to point out charlie’s dad died from covid. weird washy vision. dennis the “Only One” who didn’t get vaccinated. s14 health freak out dennis more about mac than anything else. he wanted Everything to be The Same back to when they could read eachother BUT he’s terrified of being Seen by mac. by mac who can Now see himself as gay, what the fuck is he finally going to be able to see in dennis. macs been spun around by dennis so he just goes to i’ll look after dennis Directly when he asks. i don’t want him running away from me again. also pizza poisoning. building back up that codependency. dennis needing anything else than Mac to blame all his mac problems on. Macs priest journey he’s thinking about Himself he’s Looking After Himself. not dennis. big mo should we quit the game. if you’re not having fun anymore. he’s not. everything with dennis is more Pain than anything else. being suffocated by his own love. sorry about the delusional maccricket hopes. mac and cricket ex boyfriends i’ll never stop believing in you though. macden using cricket as a middle man instead of just fucking eachother. den and charlie trying to spin him around confuse him saying he’s not irish. okay. next aspect of my identity is catholic. i’ll just go Full into that. the wars over. the storm has stopped raging. maybe. it’s complex. but it’s easier than dennis. feeling unfulfilled by the church though. this isn’t what i wanted this isn’t filling my dennis shaped hole. coming back together on the mountain. to help charlie. finding the truth. they lied to me told me i wasn’t irish just because they thought i was annoying? heartbreaking. DEVASTATING honestly. fuck you im leaving. i don’t have to help you. you’ll never help me. all i’ve been DOING is trying to Look After Myself so you wouldn’t have to. macs whole LIFE trying so desperately for someone to Love him. fuck man.

but back in the pub. mirror of paddys. we’re never escaping paddys. but why would i want to. we’re always running out into the world looking for treasures when everything we need is right here in the bar. their own ecosystem. and we carry out country (us. giggling like yeah the United States US and just. Us as a relationship) with us wherever we go! BECAUSE WE LOVE HER! and when you love someone , you can’t BEAR TO LEAVE EM BEHIND” watch dennis. face journey. he realises before mac. he loves philly he loves paddys he loves the gang he loves mac. HE CANT KEEP RUNNING AWAY. it’s okay to stop and be stationary. it’s okay to be who you are. “not ever” he’s ran away so many times. even this holiday with the gang he’s running from them. mac looks at him. mac knows. it’s okay that mac can read me that he can see through me like this. it’s good. i missed it. i’m weak and tired of running and I’m Sorry. everything i’ve done to you because i hated myself because i was scared of myself. they go to charlie. it’s the big game. they’ve embraced who they are (american) (Who They Are) and that’s when you WIN. dennis was in north dakota during the big game. wasn’t part of it. was still running. i’ve said it a thousand times sure he’s physically back in philly for years but emotionally he was still running. he’s stopped. laid down to rest.

i don’t want to hypothesise about s16 too much but after the first two eps are out i feel confident saying. the cat is poking his head out of the wall. he’s missing mac. i’ve said before end of clip show SINISTER “we’re back to normal” it’s dennis’ fantasy he wants so badly to become reality. he’s the best at monitoring reality and pulling one over on the gang. because that’s all he Ever does. that’s all he’s been doing. they’ve only just caught on or directly challenged him or tried to live in their own fantasies. i don’t know if dee’s cat is fully coming out of the wall but he’s poking his head. barely saw macden apartment last season because they were running away from her. sterile. in the season Opener we saw Her Insides. the fridge. casual domesticity. throwing out all of their furniture and sleeping on a blow up bed together. he’s stopped running. when you embrace who you are then you WIN. but. macs moving on. it’s been too long. took dennis too long to adjust. that happens. i’m so scared to tinhat about johnny but. i’m still your leading man. macs got another leading man. he’s being replaced maybe. it’s me it was always me. i think we’re gonna see more of that. i have always trusted the structure. i don’t think it’s going to be fruitless. yeah i think i’m out now. he’s BACK from north dakota he’s working on himself. macden doorway in inflates mirroring macdenbreakup. we don’t need to tell you our business. he’s protecting himself protecting their relationship. he’s not getting angry anymore. working to be a person. not letting small things blow up anymore. but it’s not going to be enough. he needs to Show Mac he cares More. it’s going to be difficult but. i trust the structure

#trusting the structure #omg i deleted the screenshots and it’s not letting me link the post #brb #okay the link should b there and i’ve added a keep reading

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alaynestone · 2 years

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hey vicky happy wincest wednesday -- this is a thing I am unilaterally starting to get some kind of conversation happening in this fandom -- so, random wincest quesion: if Dean's done sex work, do you like Sam to find out? If so, when do you think is an interesting time for that?

💗💗💗💗💗

hi liz! that's an excellent idea, though i'm a day late and it's thursday now.

for me, sex worker dean is one of those set in stone headcanons that i'm unable to separate from my understanding of his character in canon. i think it informs and complements so many of his issues and attitudes about sex and his perception of his body as a tool. frankly, every time someone tries to argue against it it only ends up reinforcing my belief in it. no, he wouldn't have better options, he wouldn't believe he's "too good for it", his clientele would not consist of milfs because women do not buy sex to the extent that men do and he'd have no way of meeting rich housewives on the road. plus, i see that last argument as an attempt to sanitize the kind of sex work a kid like dean would have to do and present the dynamics involved as less predatory. i have no interest in that.

unfortunately, i think he was exposed to predatory men early and that being dean, he'd have learned to embrace it early. if he's gonna be stared at or propositioned or threatened he might as well get back control and make some money off it. he's always looked directly at the things that scared him and tried his best to be brave and say i'm comfortable here, i have agency here. it's one of the most admirable yet heartbreaking things about him.

and while i've read and liked fics where he's only resorted to this once or twice, i don't tend to find it particularly realistic as an interpretation of canon dean. i think he started early and got good at it and learned how to hide it. i definitely think he's still actively doing that in the first seasons.

so keeping all that in mind, i generally tend to headcanon that sam found out pretty early but suspected even earlier and just wasn't ready to confront it directly. it would fit right into s1/s2 and the theme of sam getting to know his brother better as an adult and discovering new things about him or things that he had viewed differently as a teenager.

preseries up until s3 is also the time period where this discovery would cause the messiest reaction from sam and i love messiness and miscommunication when it comes to these two. i love knowing that his anger is not in fact directed at dean but at john/himself/the world, but that his guilt and protective feelings have no way of coming out pretty at this point. i love them navigating all that and coming to an understanding.

by s4/5 they have bigger issues and secrets to discover about each other so i tend to think sam knows about the rest by the time the apocalypse happens. from s6 to s15, they've been through hell and back for each other and with each other, so that's when i tend to think sam's reaction to finding out about this aspect of dean's past would be more mature. that's something you pulled off really well in "pragmatics" and that version of sam with his quiet acceptance has its own appeal and is generally really lovely to read about.

tl;dr sam finding out about dean and sex work is one of my favorite tropes and i think that there are many different ways to make it new and interesting but for maximum drama i tend to prefer this happening in the first 3 seasons.

#zmediaoutlet #wincest #supernatural #whatever this is #csa//

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thebiggestmenace · 3 months

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don't know at what cost though

I am worried

so is everyone stuck here now?

you are not good, Sam

so his grace doesn't regenerate?

"I thought you two were joined at the, everything" you know. you are so right

oh, it's Nick??? how is he alive? I thought he was dead

Jack, don't be so hard on yourself :(

Kelly's parents!!! he's named after her dad :(

how do we know if Dean's telling the truth?

THE HANDPRINT IS GONE?????

she just threw Dean on top of Sam 🤭

oh, Claire had a crush on Kaia :(((

this isn't just a cold, is it *

* no. no, it is not

PLEASE tell me they do celebrate Halloween in the GOOFIEST way possible

wait, this Bobby had a kid?

Michael's still in Dean, isn't he? somehow

they're together now? and they're taking a break :((( Bobby deserved a break

never change, Jack, never change

and he's in the hospital now

he's wearing Cas' trench coat :((((((

1, what is going on with Dean?? and 2, technically speaking, would he not have some grace left from Michael? could they extract that?

Jack, you're scaring me, please tell me they don't kill you

yeah, Cas, you fucking tell him.

he is not bringing Lucifer back wtaf

he's gone? just like that?

he really was their kid :(((

he's in heaven :((((

tf is that???

the shit from the Empty????

wait, Cas goes to the Empty to save Jack??

GARTH??????

and he has a daughter??

Sam, you're supposed to wait

he's so silly

knew Michael wasn't fully out.

this is just a dream, right? this isn't heaven or anything, right?

Jack!!! you have powers again!!

I remember this???? I remember Dean throwing Michael into a closet in his mind??? we never made it this far???

oh, it's a bad thing, nevermind >:( but now Jack gets the disappointed dad™️ talk

Dean, you are concerning me, what are you doing?

wait, I remember the box thing, too?? don't know how it ends, but I remember it and I hate it

omg clowns!!! Sam, you love clowns!!

JOHN??????

oh and they fucked with time!! and everything's weird now!

Jack used his powers one time! one! and you mean to tell me he's getting bad again?

jk it's at least twice now

Michael is in Rowena????

Jack can just do that? amazing

yk I love that Cas and Dean are talking about Jack and Sam like they're their children and they're married

"if we cannot remain civil, then you can skedaddle" IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE OH MY GOD THIS IS SO FUN

doesn't Jack hurt Elliot?

no, it's Stacy :((((

the samulet has a pair?! and that one supposedly talks to God?? idk the poeticism of that,,,,,,,,

of course they're trying to bring Lucifer back

yk I was so sure nothing bad would happen in this finale because of Dean and Cas, but I completely forgot to think about Sam and Jack

that was, uh, that was a lot

Jack, what did you do?

wait, did you kill Mary??

and now he's having hallucinations? I am so confused, what is going on

he smote her??? I know it was an accident, but still

Dean. this isn't Cas' fault

I thought the gates to Heaven were closed?

oh, Jack's gonna make more angels?

is the box even gonna work??

yeah, didn't think so

Chuck's back!! and he better help smdh

they're all confused puppies

but one of them has to die?

"I've already lost too much" Sammy :(((( it doesn't even get better :(((((

come on, Chuck

Sam......

what is this????

so everything they've killed,, they're all back? but tenfold because it's souls from Hell?

is this all of the souls??????

are they zombies?

so we have finished 14 now,,,,,, I am so confused. what was that??? they're acting like zombies, but are they just ghosts?? and is it all the souls?? cause with the amount, it sure seems it. so much has happened this season wtf and now onto avoiding 15 :')))

s1, s2, s3, s4, s5, s6, s7, s8, s9, s10, s11, s12, s13, s14, s15

#tbh i dont remember when the handprint left?#is this the first time or did it happen earlier?#menace has been too engrossed in crafts to notice :((#hehe was that one comment about ipa straight from texas #was that about jensens beer?#i feel like it was about his brewery #and the “i am a winchester” got me im afraid #that one #was uh #so #poetic?#and starting to think we actually made it through s14 as well??#cause some of these scenes are a tad too familiar #so either weve watched it already or ive seen too many edits?#which is probable but ive been making sure to avoid stuff i havent seen so i dont know #how long will it take for menace to finsih s15?#that sure is a question!!#was also gonna split up this post at like e15 #but there were only 5 episodes left so im sorry this one is lengthy!#the next one might be about the same #e18 and e20 will get their own posts but alas #its still gonna be a big boy #rambling menace #menace watches supernatural #supernatural #spn

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lonelier-version-of-you · 2 years

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do you ever just like. get into one of those moods where it's 3am and suddenly out of nowhere you have tons of energy and your thoughts are racing and you can barely hold yourself back from writing a 50k word analysis of henrik hanssen's relationship to sex (or whatever obscure meta analysis of blorbo from your shows. for me tonight it's henrik's relationship to sex.)

#was scrolling through gifs and screenshots from some old episodes and now suddenly i am just Thinking #but just like. ooh boy even if the idea of henrik being a csa survivor was dropped for a while from s15 onwards #which i get the impression it was #(i'm in no doubt it was *at least* suggested or considered if not outright planned during s13/s14 though)#you can really really see that certain aspects of how he is were crafted with that possibility in mind #so the writing for him continued to line up with him being a survivor even if they'd disregarded the idea by then #that combined with guy henry's performances #(i wonder if anything like this was in his headcanons for henrik anyway? we know rosie played jac as a survivor even though the #storyline about it never came to fruition so. it's certainly not outside the realm of possibility.)#just gives this real complexity to this aspect of henrik's character #idk if i'm making sense it's late and as i said my thoughts are racing #but just like. stuff like how he responds to people trying to make a move on him. or objectifying him even if it's just a joke comment #he's just incredibly uncomfortable with being seen in that kind of light #like all of this is stuff i noticed during my first watch through of all his scenes several years ago #didn't pick up on the direct hints in s13/s14 until last year but his consistent extreme discomfort with anything s*xual.. *that* i noticed #which is why i laughed when the actual storyline happened and people were saying it was forced and that henrik's behaviour was already #explained by his parental trauma. because like... it wasn't. that trauma explains why he's scared of commitment and proper relationships #but it doesn't explain why he has never even had so much as a fling or a ons like all the other characters #it doesn't explain why he's so viscerally uncomfortable with anyone even flirting with him #but him being a r*pe survivor... *that* fits that explains it #yes the retcons sucked but the basic idea of the storyline actually 100% fits and fills gaps in henrik's behaviour #tw;sexual abuse #tw;csa #tw;rape

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windsource · 3 years

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How Did The Car Get Here?

or: why the impala being in dean's heaven means it isn't really heaven

[content warnings: mention of the finale (15x20), though no screenshots are included because i can’t force myself to rewatch it]

okay so i'm finally cracking my knuckles and getting into a meta post after the finale, and it started because marlo and i watched scoobynatural the other month and of course that means some new revelations about the finale came to light, right? right (this is the grain of salt i'm throwing at you <3 it's gonna read like the fan fiction meta. that’s a warning)

you might be thinking, "ely, what the hell does scoobynatural have anything to do with the finale." and to that i say, surprisingly quite a lot

the basic premise of this episode is that sam, dean and cas are whisked away to a tv world (scooby doo) and have to save the people (characters—HEROES, hint hint) in it from a real-world ghost. it's revealed later that the ghost has been tied to a pocket knife that a real estate developer has been putting everywhere in order to scare shop owners into giving their stores to him. (wiki description that might’ve put it better than i could)

when sam and dean first arrive, almost immediately sam says, "how did the car get here?" but more importantly i’d like to ask: why is the car here?

so, let’s get into it.

[ID: A screenshot from “Scoobynatural” of the Impala at night. Sam and Dean stand to the left of the frame. It is captioned with Sam saying “How did the car get here?” / End ID.]

it feels like many of us, including dean himself in the finale, were surprised (read: offended) to see the Impala in heaven. what's the purpose? it's obviously inanimate, and though dean gives her a gender and a name, it doesn't make her "real," nor does it give her a soul, which seems like a heavenly prerequisite. so how—or why is the car there at all?

in scoobynatural, Baby is used simply as a means to get from one place to another (as vehicles do) UNTIL it becomes apparent that the ghost they're hunting is actually a ghost. then, the real purpose baby serves is to provide weapons and hunting materials in order to take down the big bad.

[ID: Two screenshots from “Scoobynatural.” In the first one, Velma is speaking and fixing her glasses, surrounded by the Scooby Gang. Scooby and Shaggy are on the left side of the frame, and Daphne and Fred are on the right. It’s night time. The caption reads, “We don’t have the proper tools or weapons.” The second screenshot depicts a cartoon version of Sam, with the caption, “That’s okay. We do.” / End ID.]

mind you, sam and (especially) dean weren't aware of why they'd been whisked into the tv in the first place, or that there was any "real" danger at all. dean was actually enjoying it a LOT, stuffing his face with much-too-tall sandwiches, hitting on daphne, and gaping at the mystery machine in awe. the Impala being there with them seemed insignificant (dean even says so)... until it isn’t, and her true purpose is revealed—

[ID: Two screenshots from “Scoobynatural.” The first one shows a shot from the perspective of inside the Impala’s trunk. Sam and Dean are surrounded by the Scooby Gang on either side of them, with Scooby, Shaggy, and Cas on the right side of the frame, and Velma, Daphne and Fred on the left. The caption describes the trunk unlocking. The second screenshot is of the contents in the trunk: several weapons like a wooden stake, various guns, an axe, a knife, and an arrow. / End ID.]

so, with the Impala appearing in the Scooby universe with all the equipment they could ever want...or need or...dream, doesn’t that remind you of what bobby says in 15x20? let’s see...

[ID: A screenshot of the 15x20 transcript. It’s a snippet from Bobby’s line, which reads, “You got everything you could ever want...or need or...dream. So, I guess the question is...what are you gonna do now, Dean?” / End ID.]

best of all, right after Bobby says this, Dean spots the Impala and decides to go for a drive:

[ID: A screenshot of the 15x20 transcript. It reads, “(Dean looks away from Bobby and sees the Impala, with the original KAZ 2Y5 license plate, parked on the road).” / End ID.]

let me rewind a bit to something i said earlier. “sam and (especially) dean weren't aware of why they'd been whisked into the tv in the first place, or that there was any "real" danger at all.” in my theory for 15x20, I think it’s actually quite a similar situation, in that they are fooled into thinking there is no real danger and that heaven is just...heaven. bobby is there, along with some (crappy) beer and dean’s parents are there, and— wait, doesn’t bobby hate john? and hang on...you’re telling me the beer in heaven is crappy? and hey, wasn’t jack acting a bit strange after becoming god? what was up with that?

a lot of things about the finale just...don’t add up. and the impala is there, even though Baby doesn’t have a soul and therefore could not be/manifest itself in heaven (just as she couldn’t actually be in scoobynatural because she wasn’t there when sam and dean got sucked into the tv). so we’re back to asking: why is the car here?

i’m going to just take a shot in the dark here and say that maybe it’s for the same reason that she was there in scoobynatural. to serve a purpose when they realize that there’s actually a big bad to be fought—that things aren’t exactly as they seem.

as to who the big bad is, take your pick!! it could be chuck!jack, or the Empty (it is still loud in there after all), it could even be a djinn dream. but throwing Baby into heaven for seemingly no reason other than to have dean drive her for like fifty years just seems ridiculous to me. she’s got weapons in her trunk, weapons that the heroes (good place to remind you that there is LITERALLY a s15 ep called The Heroes’ Journey) can use to their advantage.

there’s a lot that points to something being off about the finale. but personally, i think Baby might be our biggest clue.

kirk out.

#metas #my post #rambleoncas meta #FINALLY DROPPING THIS WAAAH #described #finale denial #spn 15x20 #creativecaviar #klinejack #chocolatecakecas #roc original #spnclownpals

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goldentournesol · 3 years

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Not in That Way

*gif not mine, found on Giphy*

(Spencer Reid x fem!Reader)

The one where Spencer’s TA falls in love with him.

Length: 3.3k

A/N: VAGUE SPOILERS FOR S15 AHEAD! AGE GAP (10 years). Read at your own risk everybody, very angsty. NO PART TWO’S WILL BE WRITTEN. enjoy :)

masterlist

It wasn’t hard, really. It wasn’t hard at all to fall in love with Spencer Reid. In fact, it was the easiest thing she’d ever done. It came so easily that it shook her to the core.

Really, what’s not to love? He is a badass FBI agent with a heart of gold, he can literally recite almost any book to her on demand, and it certainly doesn’t hurt that he looks like he’s been sculpted by a coveted artist.

She didn’t know though, she didn’t know how easy it would be to be completely enamored by someone. She didn’t know what kind of life she’d be stepping into when she’d applied to become his Teaching Assistant. She’d heard from her peers that there was a part-time professor who had been looking for a TA. She signed up without a second thought, desperate for any kind of connections that could possibly help her with her PhD in forensic psychology. When she’d learned that he was a certified genius whose other job was to be a real life superhero, she hoped and prayed he’d pick her application.

She was over the moon when she found out that he did indeed pick her out of all the students who had applied. This was an opportunity of a lifetime. She’d seen his university ID photo on the website and thought he was attractive, but seeing him in person was almost magical. The camera definitely could not quite pick up on the subtle gold flecks in his irises or the silky sheen of his hair. And that smile. She was sure she could drown in it forever.

After being chosen and going through a number of interviews, Y/N learned just how meticulous Dr. Reid was in everything he did. She helped him create the syllabus as well as build his lesson plans. Over the semester, she would go over his grading since he had the tendency to give students the answers instead of making helpful comments on the papers to make them think and reflect. She’d also learned about his particular aversion to technology, which meant they had multiple meet-ups when he was in town just so she can walk him through certain systems, like the university’s portal system as well as the email. She also showed him how to pose his answers as questions instead, explaining that sometimes, he shouldn’t answer their incomplete thoughts because it's an undergrad class. Also, with his unpredictable schedule concerning the FBI, she would often step in and teach his class whenever he was away on a case.

They’d become good friends outside of his office and classroom, probably closer than they should have been. He was just too likeable and she was always eager enough to hear what he had to say, thus a bond between them was born and reinforced each time they saw each other. He was so thoughtful, it shocked her. Once he’d heard her mention that she used to love collecting keychains when she was a child, and made sure to get her a new one from each state he’d visit thanks to his trips around the country. Her previous boyfriends were beyond disappointing in comparison to say the least, and they weren’t even dating. He knew her favorite coffee order by heart and often had it ready with a fresh croissant whenever they met at the university’s coffee shop and if they were meeting at his office, he’d take them to go.

It was little things like that that made her fall in love with him. And she knew, it’s not like she didn’t, she just chose to hide it with every cell of her being. Crushing on your professor is pretty common amongst university students, but being a TA and being desperately in love with your professor was a whole different kind of story.

She already admired his intelligence in class immensely, however hearing his stories from his time out in the field made her heart grow three times the size of normal. His stories ranged from being about geographical profiling, to action-packed anecdotes, and even funny moments with the team.

Was she constantly impressed by him? Yes.

Was she constantly worried about him? Also yes.

Which is why she’d practically made him adopt the habit of texting or calling her every time he landed in DC. They’d been chasing this unsub, Lynch, for months on end and he’d informed her that they were finally close to getting him. The last time they talked two days ago, he was feeling confident. But then it was just silence. He hadn’t texted her, he hadn’t called her. She didn’t even know if he was back in DC. Her mind took her places she didn’t want to go. He’d gotten so good with keeping her updated that this silence was turning her blood into ice water.

She’d left 11 missed calls so far. But she didn’t give up, she was determined to hear from him. The next morning she tried again, holding her breath and squeezing her eyes shut in a silent prayer.

“Hello?” Someone finally picked up, a woman.

“Hello? Who is this? I’m trying to reach Spencer Reid.” Y/N said into the phone, voice clearly on the edge of tears.

“Oh you must be Y/N Y/L/N. You’re Spencer’s TA. I’m Penelope Garcia, I work with Spencer.” She said into the phone evenly, calmly.

“Yes, I am. Did something happen to Spencer? He hasn’t contacted me in two days. Why do you have his phone?” Y/N worried into the phone. She could hear every heartbeat, loud and clear.

“Spencer is in the hospital. There was an explosion yesterday and he hit his head really hard. We found him passed out in his apartment this morning.” Penelope answered. Y/N’s eyes widened and she felt the tears slip from her eyes quickly. The panic began to set in.

“C-could you please text me the address?” Y/N managed to whisper into the phone through her tears.

“Of course, sweetie. He’s going to be okay. His mother is here, I’m assuming you know about Diana?” She asked tenderly.

“Yes, yes, I know. I’ll be there as soon as I can.” Y/N said, already rushing to put on shoes and looking for her keys.

The drive to the hospital wasn’t long, but Y/N felt like it took ages to get there anyway. Her breathing was uneven and her eyes were already swollen as if she’d been crying for days. There was a bad, bad feeling reverberating around in her chest. She’d somehow floated through the hospital like she was running on autopilot.

She’d found the room and met eyes with a blonde woman adorning two identical blue puffs in her hair. She would have thought they were adorable if she wasn’t panicking her heart out. She spotted Spencer laying on the hospital bed with oxygen tubes hanging around his ears and inserted into his nose. The sight made her stomach lurch. Something about the way his usually pink lips were drained of their color made her want to sob until tomorrow came. Beside the bed on the other side sat Diana Reid, a tall woman with short blonde hair. She’d seen her in photos before. Diana merely stared at her with a hint of a smile.

She stepped in the hospital room, swallowing down the bile in her throat, “H-Hi, I’m Y/N.” She waved tentatively into the room, almost unable to keep with the tensity of the two women’s gazes. She wiped at her eyes and stood at the foot of Spencer’s bed, “Is he going to be okay?” She asked, staring at the steady rise and fall of Spencer’s chest. That way it was reassuring to watch him. She could hear her heartbeat in her ears as she stood.

“The doctors are hopeful.” Penelope replied, assessing the young woman who just entered. She was much younger than she previously thought she was. Although she had no idea what to expect when it came to Spencer’s academic life, he was always surprising her.

Diana sat still and silent in the hospital chair, a pensive expression draped across her features. Penelope sensed a tension in the room and looked towards Diana, “Hey, Diana, would you like to come with me down to the cafeteria to fetch some jello for Spencer to eat when he wakes up?”

Y/N sent Penelope a sidelong glance filled with gratitude. She tuned out the sounds of Diana telling Penelope the story of the first time Spencer had jello as they exited the small room. She immediately pulled up the chair closest to his bed and grasped his hand tightly. She let out a shaky breath at the contact. Cold, his hand was so, so cold.

“Oh, Spencer, you scared the shit out of me.” She whispered, pressing her lips to the back of his hand quickly, “I could have lost you today...and-and I wouldn’t have known what to do with myself if that would have happened. I know you probably can’t hear me, but I still have to say what I’m going to say. I have to. For myself. So here goes,” she pauses, taking a deep breath, “there’s nothing that scares me more than losing you, and that thought alone terrifies me.” She sniffled, wiping away her tears, “What I feel for you terrifies me, Spencer. I didn’t know I was capable of loving someone so deeply until I met you. And...I don’t know what to do with all this love, I want to hand it all to you, let you see yourself the way I see you, but I can’t do that. I can’t.” She held back an incoming sob, whispering, “I can’t ask that of you.”

She bowed her head and rested it along his forearm, her silent tears soaking through the hospital sheets. The fear of grieving for him outweighed the fear of rejection. She’d never forgive herself if he died without knowing how big of a space he occupied in her heart. She didn’t know if she was brave enough to tell him to his face while he was awake, but this was a start. Solidifying her feelings was a start. And man, were they solid.

A few minutes later, her phone began to ring because of an endless stream of emails. There was a class today, and she’d have to teach it. She went back and forth from her phone to Spencer’s face and released a deep, heavy sigh from the pit of her chest. She stood from her seat and hovered her hand over his cheek before allowing it to rest timidly on his skin.

“I have to go, but I’ll see you soon.” She paused, chewing on her lip, “I love you.” She said softly, fresh tears making their way back to the brim of her eyes. She pulled away from him and exited the room swiftly.

Spencer’s bleary eyes opened slightly to just barely catch the sight of her disappearing into the hallway from which she came. Seconds later, Penelope and his mother came marching in, seeing his open eyes.

Penelope set down the cups of jello nearby and Diana made her way to her son quickly. He could barely keep his eyes open for long enough. It was a small achievement but they both held onto it dearly.

Hours later, he blinked his eyes open again as he heard his mother and Penelope conversing about his favorite type of cloud. Diana leaned over her son’s bed and set a comforting hand on his shoulder. He stared at her fondly.

“Am I alive or is this heaven?” He asked, smiling slightly.

“You are very much alive.” Diana smiled broadly at him.

Garcia had since gone back to the office to assist the team in finally closing the Lynch case. Spencer was just waking up from yet another snooze.

Diana looked at him closely, sometimes he felt she was the profiler in the room, “She told you didn’t she?”

Spencer rubbed at his eyes slightly, “Who are you talking about?” He yawned.

“The pretty girl who was in here earlier.” Y/N’s name had slipped her mind the second she said it. Spencer stared at his mother incredulously, shocked at just how clear her mind was at the moment. Diana took his silence as an affirmative and nodded at him.

“You should tell her.” She said definitively. For a moment, he doubted if he understood just what she meant, but he understood.

“How did you know?” Spencer asked curiously.

“I told you, a mother always knows. And I saw the way she looked at you. She deserves to know, Spencer.” Diana said.

She deserves to know.

The thought tumbled around in his head for days after he was discharged from the hospital. He was on medical leave for the moment but as soon as he could see straight, he took the train to her apartment. He’d been there a few times, they’d had a few casual dinners there while grading papers together or coming up with future lesson plans. His hands were on the verge of trembling as he knocked on her apartment door. The numbers nailed on the door mocked him as he stood waiting for her to open.

She frowned at the sound, she wasn’t expecting anybody. She pushed her laptop to the side and stood to straighten her pajamas, making her way to the door. She ripped it open as soon as she saw who it was.

“Spencer! Oh thank goodness you’re okay! I’ve been worried sick about you.” She threw her arms around his middle tightly, making him stagger a bit from the impact, but he enveloped her in his arms anyway. The contact was very welcome.

“Hey.” He smiled into the hug, his heart spilling with gratitude over being worthy enough of her attention. They separated from the embrace and she stared at him with a look resembling wonder.

“What are you doing here? I thought you still had a few more days off until you had to get back to work. Come in, come in.” She moved aside to let him in. She also moved a plethora of blankets and textbooks off the couch to make space for him to sit.

“I know, I’m sorry for kind of coming over unannounced. I didn’t mean to intrude or anything.” He eyed her matching set of cartoon character pajamas as he took a seat, making a mental note that it was the most adorable thing he’s ever seen. She blushed under his gaze but shook her head nonetheless.

“Oh come on, you know you’re always welcome here. Can I get you something to drink? Some water or coffee, maybe?” She asked.

“Water’s fine.” He smiled, leaning back into the couch. She nodded and made her way into the kitchen. Spencer’s shoulders untensed for a moment and he hadn’t realized that he’d been carrying so much of his worries in them around her. She came back with the water and took a seat next to him, angling her body to face him. He muttered a thank you as he sipped from it, unsure how to approach the situation.

“I wanted to thank you. For coming to the hospital to see me. That meant a lot.” He met her eyes and saw a flash of panic dance across her irises. How did he know she was there? Penelope probably told him, right? He couldn’t have heard her.

“Of course, Spencer. It’s the least I could do.” She smiled sweetly. His heart cleaved in his chest as he stared at the sweet girl in front of him.

What did he ever do to deserve her friendship?

He fidgeted with the glass in his hands, a silence beginning to drape over them.

“Is everything okay?” She asked, noticing his fidgeting.

He took a deep breath and set the glass down on the coffee table in front of them. He turned his body to face her and reached for her soft hands. Her breath hitched at the intimate contact, butterflies erupting in the pit of her abdomen.

“You are a remarkable person, Y/N. I’m so lucky to have you in my life. I see the absolute worst that humanity has to offer on a daily basis, but you have made it your mission to make my life easier. And you do, honestly, I wouldn’t know what to do without you.” He said with soft eyes and a half-laugh. She smiled back, she could practically feel the rush from his words directly in her brain.

“And it is an honor to be loved by you,” his voice hesitated to say the word, his eyes darkening with regret as he continued. Realization snapped into place for her as he said, “but I can’t give you what you need.”

He had heard her. He knew.

Her blood ran cold as she tore her hands away from his, as if the skin on his hands had the ability to burn her. He frowned as he watched her frantic eyes search his for any semblance of dishonesty. Her throat closed up over all the words that fought to surface. She opened her mouth to say something but nothing came up. Instead, tears sprung to the corners of her eyes.

“What?” She whispered, brokenhearted and momentarily in disbelief.

“I’m sorry, Y/N.” He tried to console her but she was past the point of consolation.

“I-I understand.” She nodded painfully, tears cascading down her face before she even got the chance to wipe them away, “It’s my fault. I shouldn’t have said anything, it’s completely unprofessional.” She swallowed an incoming sob as best as she could.

“No, I’m glad you told me, but if I’m being honest, I knew long before it. This isn’t about professionality, I don’t care about that. But I care about you, a lot.” Spencer said softly, staring at the young woman in front of him. She shook her head, utterly devastated and doing her best to shield herself from his gaze. Thoughts escaped her as her heart took a deep-dive to settle in her abdomen.

“And I thought I should let you know how I feel. I love you, Y/N,” he paused, “just not in that way.” The soft voice he used was completely useless against the harshness of the words.

She tried, she tried her absolute hardest to suppress the incoming sob, but those words just about broke the dam. She rubbed at her eyes, nodding. He tried to set a comforting hand on her shoulder but decided against it. She took a deep breath and stood up from the couch.

That was enough humiliation for the day.

“No, no, I completely understand.” She said, voice wobbly and eyes ringed with red. He frowned up at her at the sight of her being so upset.

“Will you be okay?” He asked as he stood up from his seat. She laughed slightly, this man had devastated her, broken her heart with a few simple words and still wondered if she’d be okay. That’s Spencer Reid for you. The question made her heart ache and long for him more. His simplicity and good intentions made her question why the world wasn’t kind enough to let her have him.

“No, I won’t. And I probably won’t be okay for a long time. Because I will keep meeting men and keep comparing them to you so, until I stop doing that, no, I won’t be okay, Spencer.” She answered with a surprisingly stable voice. He frowned and nodded.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered, stepping forward to cup her cheek and gently use his thumb to wipe the remainder of her tears. Her glassy eyes bored right into his, her lips wobbling at the contact. She then closed her eyes and leaned her cheek into his palm, soaking in his warmth one last time before he tore himself away from her completely and showed himself out of the apartment without looking back.

That was when she allowed herself to fall apart. He heard her heart wrenching cries from behind the door and hesitated, but decided to walk away anyway with a chest heavy with regret.

She will never be enough for him, she thought.

He will never be enough for her, he thought.

#im sorry #spencer reid #dr spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid fanfiction #Spencer Reid fic #Criminal Minds #criminal minds fanfic #criminal minds fic #criminal minds fanfiction #spencer reid angst #spencer reid masterlist #spencer reid oneshot #spencer reid imagine #professor reid #spencer reid fluff #mgg

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cowboycunt · 3 years

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🎃 halloween horror 👻

hello!! happy almost october!!!! here are some nice horror (ish) themed fic recs for your perusing :)

Giant, Anguish, Danger (E, 73k)

the sexual tension and psychological suspension here are very nice. set in minnesota (my beloved) and features some cool mythology. essentially tfw + kevin get lost in a snowy forest and are we hunting the monster or is the monster hunting us?

Raining Blue (M, 8k)

perfect if you want a little gore before bed. i read this at night while some cats went at it outside my window, i was properly spooked. something in the house doesn’t want tfw to leave. cas gets very hurt in this.

***I Cleanse The Mirror (T, 25k)

another snowy forest horror. dean and cas share a body in this which is fun. a great character study on cas. i really enjoyed reading this. def read if you think a bit too much about angel biology or how cas is such a self sacrificing bastard.

***Death Rattles (E, 30k)

ooh this one actually scared me a fair bit. great psychological horror. is the house haunted? is cas just going crazy?? this one might fit the more strict ‘horror’ genre the best - i could see it playing like a movie as i read it.

Bring Up the Deep (E, 22k)

the ambiance of this is just *chefs kiss* they’re in rainy seaside maine and there are sea monsters(???). tbh i have an irrational fear of boats so i was vaguely uncomfortable for a good portion of reading this but that’s probably just me. also has a nice side of deancas but dean doesn’t want sam to know. i’ve never read stephen king but i feel like the vibes are similar. idk.

***The Body (NR, 20k)

sooo nice and spooky - i read this during the day and was still jumping a bit. set during the divorce arc of s15, so the relationship drama is in full swing and quite well written. dean and cas can’t figure out what’s up with jane doe and they can’t sort out their problems either.

the following story takes place at night (M, 12k, animal abuse cw, past sexual assault cw)

okay this one is honestly p disturbing but i was so captivated. the author has a very unique writing style that fits perfectly for the genre. essentially it’s a kinda canonverse au where cas is a cult leader and the boys don’t know if he’s actually an angel or not. would recommend but not for the faint of heart

disclaimer: i’ve noticed a lot of horror genre fic recs have mcd. cool!! good for you!!! not my cup of tea though. as such, none of these fics have mcd. one has a majorish minor character death but that’s in their tags. that being said, these fics are horror themed so some of these are pretty graphic in the body horror department. as an fyi.

#i hope people enjoy and read #also i am excited for new horror fics this month #always a treat :)#destiel fic recs #fic recs #fic #spn fic recs #fish.rec

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americachavez · 3 years

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did cas really tell dean to kneel before their new god? did that actually happen? i thought him beating the shit out of dean in that alley was the most unrestrainedly horny thing this show had ever done ACTUALLY you know what scratch that new question: top horny moments from the cw's supernatural (2005 - 2020)

getting this ask feels like my sins of the last week have been weighed against the Trials I Have Gone Through since the premier of supernatural on the wb in september of 2005 and I’m not sure if it is a punishment or reward

some notes before we begin:

the ep with dean’s male siren was like, conceptually horny but not actually that horny because the dude was uglie. I’m sorry to this man

all you sam girls out there. I respect you but I do not respect jared padalecki who is JUST tall and has zero sex appeal. but those eps where he’s like, drinking ruby’s blood and then eating her pussy are. you know. I’ll give you that

I am ONLY UP TO SEASON 10 so fair warning this is not comprehensive but the horniness does seem to drop off sharply after the mark of cain is no longer in play lol gotta love a good demon murder tattoo plot

this is easily the most insane thing I’ve ever done, including the destiel manifesto

S1 EP12: the scene where dean gets healed by the faith healer, on his knees with a hand in his hair and looking somewhere between religious ecstasy, brain death and an orgasm. starting this list off great

S1 EP22: azazel possessing john winchester. no I will not explain further if u know u know <3

S3 EP10: dean being taunted by a dream version of himself, this is where we first got the daddy’s blunt little instrument line. still burned in my hippocampus a good 13 years later thank yew

S4 EP1: dean crawling out of his own grave covered in grave dirt. hot. the HANDPRINT. HOT. also tangent but this reveal after the s3 finale was WILD back in 2008 I hollered in my dorm room after canvassing for obama. simpler times man

S4 EP 1: cas’ intro scene. the barn. the shadow wings. the hair??? getting stabbed in the chest by the man you just pulled out of hell. getting aaaallll up in that personal space. his little eyebrow. “you don’t think you deserve to be saved.” OUTRAGEOUSLY FLAMING

S4 EP02: “I dragged you out of hell I can throw you back in.” <<< this angel tops. mark dean down as scared and horny etc

S4 EP16: this ENTIRE EPISODE but specifically the part where dean tortures alastair as some kind of foreplay and then alastair kicks his ass. carved you into a new animal. jesus.

S4 EP16: wait I forgot about the part where cas also gets his ass kicked and looks all....hm. dazed and covered in blood while he’s on his knees and about to die. yeah.

S5 EP4: I mean this entire ep is unfairly horny considering everyone is dying of a zombie plague and hasn’t showered in like, 4 years but if I had to pick one hmmm. the dean/dean interrogation scene with the panty kink yeah I know it’s not original but hm. it happened. also misha collins just being able to convey that CAS IS A FLEXIBLE SLUT with a single roll of his shoulders. who SAYS this man can’t act!!!!!

S5 EP18: the ALLEY SCENE. DEAN DOESN’T FIGHT BACK. CAS HOLDS HIM UP OFF THE GROUND AND THEN THROWS HIM ACROSS THE ALLEY. WHY DID EVERYONE THINK CAS COULDN’T TOP. you all had brainworms.

S5 EP18: when cas locks dean in the panic room to stop him from saying yes to michael and “well cas not for nothing but the last person who looked at me like that I got laid” I hate this show. wait I think the blow me cas line is in this episode too what the fuck were they on here

S6 EP5: the scene where dean gets turned into a vampire. between the old dude who I think calls dean a pretty boy (??) and soulless sam....watching??? no ******* but there were just some absolutely foul energies in that scene and I still do not understand WHAT they were thinking

S6 EP20: cas doing a double smite on two demons by slamming them to the ground and then shoving another demon back in its vessel and then smiting him in the same motion. TOP. ENERGY.

S6 EP22: season 6 is possibly cas’ horniest season because he’s like, going through angel puberty after getting his first boner for dean, but the final cas eps are. whoof. cas eats a bunch of souls and proclaims himself to be a new god in order to handle said boner, and then the season ends with cas telling them to bow down and profess their love to him, their new lord, or he will destroy them. note: the way this is framed makes it look like cas is only staring at dean while he says this, even though sam and bobby are also there. the season ends with dramatic zooms on both cas and dean’s faces respectively. this made me actively regret ditching this show after s5 lol

S8 EP??: literally EVERY SINGLE PURGATORY FLASHBACK. cas dean and benny are all purgatory hot in the “pop 10 cranberry pills and risk the UTI” kind of way but also. dean being the hot girl bottom between two tops who hate each other. I really. whew. I need to go take a shower.

S8 EP17: if I get canceled for including the crypt scene on this list I blame you bud. but dean on his knees begging a brainwashed cas to stop killing him WAS sexy. how many times has dean been on his knees in this list wait there’s another one coming up next jsldjfsldkjf

S9 EP2: abaddon getting dean on his knees (YEAH) and pulling his hair and praising him for always coming when called HELLO???? the only thing that ruins this is dean says “I can’t tell if we’re gonna fight or make out” because this is the CW and they won’t let him say fuck

S9 EP6: ah. this entire episode is Emotionally Horny but the horny horny part is when they’re in the car and dean is telling cas to unbutton his shirt and. watches. I know this was on my destiel manifesto but I need it here too

S9 EP9: cas, covered in blood, slitting another angel’s throat and eating his grace after getting tortured. that shot alone made me understand why this website was so goddamn horny for misha collins for nearly a damn decade

S9 EP11: MARK OF CAIN BABEY. cain watching dean beat up a bunch of demons as an audition for taking on the mark, while crowley also is a fucking voyeur to the whole thing. cain is also a hot silver fox with daddy energies. I said what I said

S9 EP 16: dean getting the first blade. he’s chained to a pillar and being menaced by a foppish dandy who wants to add him to his “collection” (WOW). dean then kills him with the blade and whew. murder is sexy sometimes

S9 EP21: dean being pinned against a wall by abaddon’s power, then using the mark of cain to break her hold, calling the first blade to him psychically and then killing her. god the mark of cain is hot

S9 EP23: dean waking up with the demon eyes NUT

S10 EP2: demon dean beating up that dude with the boring backstory and kicking his ass. really was a go on baby I got your flower moment because I hated that dude and I love demon dean

S10 EP3: demon dean being chained up and taunting sam about how his brother is gone, then hunting sam through the bunker. demon dean in general was VERY fun for me, someone who loves trash

S10 EP9: dean going berserk and killing a bunch of pedophile rapists/child abusers. I’m sorry I know this show is trying to preach morality at me about monsters and unnecessary murder and humanity or whatever but we blew past that like 8 SEASONS AGO. also the mark of cain is sexy

S10 EP14: the rest of this list is really gonna be mark of cain stuff isn’t it look I’m here to have fun. cain and dean’s fight. cain continuously tossing his mane of hair back and taunting dean with the picture of what he’s going to become, who he’s going to kill. dean begging cain to tell him that he can stop, and then ultimately killing him. rip daddy.

S11 EP4: again I have not watched this however. every shot of this episode is PRESTIGE TELEVISION because driving a muscle car is sexy. and especially the shot of dean all beat to hell and begging his car to start and giving her a little kiss from his fingers to her dash. ugh. masculinity.

S12 EP10: the bearded salt-and-pepper daddy look returns, only it’s an angel this time and he’s wearing a vest and shirtsleeves and he swordfights with a hot redheaded lady in a suit and an eyepatch. this show is good sometimes!!! and oh fuck lol I just realized this is the same guy who played krissy’s hot hunter dad in s7 probably the first guy who’s hotter as an angel than a hunter. huh.

S12 EP 11: dean riding larry the mechanical bull to “broomstick cowboy.” I have no idea where this factors into the ep but I have seen. the youtube clip

S13 EP23: from what I can tell s13 is way more emotionally horny than boner horny, although dean burning cas’ body was sexy. but the horniest part was dean saying yes to michael and then michael taking over and saying “thanks for the suit.” we are going to ignore the silliest fight scene in existence as well as the final shot ending on a FREEZE FRAME like a goddamn tiktok

S14: not gonna pick a specific moment because I have not watched yet!!! but michael dean is hot. idk why michael is weirdly hot and I cannot stand any iteration of lucifer on this television programme. it should be the reverse but I’m forever an older sibling stan apparently. someone who is catholic could probably explain this better.

S15 EP13: genevieve padalecki and danneel ackles fight flirting as ruby and anael I CANNOT BELIEVE THEY HELD OUT ON THIS TILL THE LAST SEASON

I know I am missing things but this is already an absolutely incomprehensible screed. I know I’m missing shit from the latter seasons but give me time I’m pacing myself

#reply tag #spn tag #literally no one read this lol this is insane #Anonymous

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teamfreewill2pointo · 3 years

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Sam’s Emotional Arc 1/3

I hated the finale immediately, but I’ve spent some time with it and talked to friends who loved it. I can see now what it was about, and I’ve come to appreciate the story they were trying to tell, even if I think it didn’t land right.

I’ve been told that my meta on this has helped other people come to terms with the finale, so I thought I’d compile it in one place from across various discord channels and twitter posts. If you are struggling with the finale, I hope it helps you.

Part of this actually started with a shit post. I was making a joke about Sam being psychic since he was scared of clowns when Dean died by one. I realized that may have been deliberate. I dug into the story more and now I’m convinced it was. Then I came across some excellent meta that fit with the themes I was finding and opened up the series even more for me.

Happiness isn’t in the having, it’s in just being. It’s in just saying it.

Cas said it. Dean accepted it. Sam lived it. First, Sam’s journey.

Clowns pop up in s15 before the barn scene. In 15.01, which was written by Dabb, Sam is injured by a clown. Castiel is able to save Sam and heal his injury. The clown keeps coming after Sam, with Sam having fight scenes with the clown, while others attack the other ghosts. The clown is kicking the shit out of Sam again, and Castiel saves him once more. Sam is unable to fight off the clown on his own both times.

They run until they are able to escape outside a magical barrier. Sam turns to the clown and says, “shut up”.

This is literally Sam running from his fears. On top of that, this isn’t just any clown, but the ghost of John Wayne Gacy, from an episode also written by Dabb.

Dean: A serial killer clown. I mean, this is, like, the best/worst thing that’s ever happened to you, you know, ‘cause you love serial killers, but – but you hate clowns.

Sam gets nervous and struggles with the lighter before he’s able to get rid of the clown, for now.

I believe this is a metaphor for hunting in general: it’s both the best of Sam’s life and also the worst. The clowns symbolize his relationship with Dean.

Plucky Pennywhistle's Magical Menagerie was co-written by Dabb (see the pattern?). Sam’s fear of clowns was known since season 2. In season 7, Dabb explored where this fear came from.

On the surface, Sam’s fear is just because he found them creepy, but the episode explains that they actually come from Sam’s fear of being left behind by Dean.

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This episode comes directly after an episode where Sam worried that Dean would get himself killed

Sam: Look... Dean, the thing is, tonight... It almost got you killed. Now, I don't care how you deal. I really, really don't. But just don't – don't get killed. Dean: I'll do what I can. Sam: Well, what's that supposed to mean? Dean: It means I'll do what I can. All right? You can shut up about it.

Sam is dealing with Hallucifer at this moment, but Hallucifer doesn’t really scare him. Losing Dean does.

Sam has a conversation with an employee about greatest fears.

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Recognize the actress? She came back for s15 in 15.06. I don’t believe this was a coincidence. 15.06 featured Castiel helping a parent find their lost child in a season that features Castiel worried about losing Jack. Through his experience with her, Castiel confronts his fears and doubts and then returns to join in the fight against God. [I’ll touch on Castiel’s journey more in his chapter]

Sam’s greatest fear is losing Dean. There’s a lot in the series about how Sam felt lonely and abandoned for much of his childhood. A whole episode, Just My Imagination, centers around this. Sam hated when Dean went off on hunts without him.

source In The Chitters, Sam tells Dean how his fear of losing his family paralyzed him as child. It’s a story where an older brother dies and the younger brother never recovers from it until he’s able to lay him to rest (sound familiar???)

Sam: You know, whenever you and Dad used to leave me to go hunting, and I-and I wouldn’t hear from y’all for a while, I, um, I was always sure that some vamp or rugaru, or take your pick, I always figured one of them finally got ya. I tried to think what to do, you know, the next step to take. I was just lost. Dean: We came back, though, every time.

You might naturally think, “Wait a minute! Sam left Dean multiple times!” Honestly, this was something I had a huge issue with when watching through the show the first time. I didn’t understand Sam and hated him leaving Dean in s8. I was completely on Dean’s side at first. But, on multiple rewatches and talking to others, I’ve realized that when Sam left Dean, he was running from his fear. In this TV Guide interview, Jared perfectly sums up why Sam left in season 1; he couldn’t stand to see his family die. Dabb wrote Dark Side of the Moon along with a comic that explains why Sam left in detail. While the comic isn’t official canon, it shows Dabb’s thought process. In it, Sam sees his family as running towards a horrible end and can’t handle dealing with that.

Dean: So what are you gonna do? You're just gonna live some normal, apple pie life? Is that it? Sam: No. Not normal. Safe.

There are many more points in the series where we learn about Sam’s fear of Dean dying. This would be 3948573945 pages long if I wrote them all out, so I’m going to focus on the key moments that loop back to this ending, but there’s so much more there.

If you are struggling with this and need more, please let me know and I can do a deeper dive into that subject. We first see Sam’s inability to let Dean go in season 1 when Sam refuses to let Dean die in Faith.

Dean: You're not gonna let me die in peace, are you? Sam: I'm not gonna let you die, period. We're going.

Sam’s whole arc in s3 is him being unable to handle Dean dying. He wants to save Dean, but Dean won’t let himself be saved. This was what Gabriel was trying to teach him in Mystery Spot.

Trickster: This obsession to save Dean? The way you two keep sacrificing yourselves for each other? Nothing good comes out of it. Just blood and pain. Dean's your weakness. And the bad guys know it, too. It's gonna be the death of you, Sam. Sometimes you just gotta let people go.

This is how Ruby gets under Sam’s skin and what gets him to start working with her. Everything Sam did was to save Dean. In s4, Sam’s arc is about him sacrificing himself in order to save Dean. He’s gutted from being unable to save Dean. In 4.12, Sam decides to drink demon blood in order to save Dean

Dean: [says that they will die early] Sam: Maybe we'll be different, Dean. Dean: What kind of Kool-Aid you drinking, man? Sammy, it ends bloody or sad. That's just the life. Sam: What if we could win?Dean: "Win"?Sam: If there was a way we could just...put an end to all of it.

When Sam breaks out of the panic room, he’s suicidal. He’s determined to save Dean with his life as the cost he’s willing to pay. He didn’t think he would survive killing Lilith. He was committing suicide in that moment. The reason why Sam is so willing to sacrifice himself in s5 is because he has low self esteem. He blames himself for everything that goes wrong. In Sam, Interrupted 5.11, also by Dabb, Sam has a breakdown under the weight of his guilt. He hates himself and he feels his rage is out of control. In season 6, we see soulless Sam and, unlike souled Sam, he has no rage. Yes, he’ll kill when necessary, but he’s not angry. It was Sam’s fear driving his rage. He felt out of control of his life and let it lead him down a dark path. In season 7, he sees Dean heading down a dark path and he feels helpless to stop it. He worries about dragging Dean down and tells Dean to let him go. But, at the same time, he’s developing coping techniques. He’s starting to face his fears.

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And then Dean disappears and Sam completely falls apart. Sam didn’t have a healthy relationship with Amelia. They were two broken people clinging to each other. Sam and Dean struggle to reconnect after their time apart. There’s a lot of text addressing the horror of a partner dying and people trying to escape from it.

Mrs Holmes: He could see the end of my days were at hand, and... He had lived centuries all alone, but I don't think he could bear the thought of life without me. That's why he drove off that bridge. You must think I'm a monster.

In Hunteri Heroica written by GUESS WHO!?!? Sam finally acknowledges that he was living in a dream world with Amelia. He was running from his past. We see a flash back with Sam pressing on his scar, which he did to help himself distinguish fantasy from reality.

The episode is about a man refusing to engage in reality and harming those around him. Sam has a big confrontation with him

Sam: Look, it can be nice living in a dream world. It can be great. I know that. And you can hide, and you can pretend... all the crap out there doesn't exist, but you can't do it forever because... eventually, whatever it is you're running from – it'll find you. [CASTIEL appears to be taking Sam’s words to heart.] It'll come along, and it'll punch you in the gut. And then... then you got to wake up, because if you don't, then trying to keep that dream alive will destroy you! It'll destroy everything!

Likewise, when Sam was with Jessica, he wasn’t honest about himself. He was hiding from his family and his past. Running to avoid pain. Sam is avoidant in general. Not just in his relationship with Dean. When he talks with Rowena in 13.12 Various & Sundry Villains about his fears of Lucifer, he admits that he could talk about it with Dean, but he can’t bring himself to.

Sam: I’ve seen it too. What he really looks like behind – behind whatever vessel. It… Yeah, still keeps me up at night. Rowena: How do you deal with it? Sam: I guess I don’t deal with it. Not really. I mean, I pushed it down and, um, the world kept almost ending, so I keep pushing it down, and I don’t know. [stammering] I really don’t talk about it, not even with Dean. I mean, I could. You know, he’d listen, but… That’s not something I really know how to share.

In 15.20, Sam’s past is front and center. Literally. I know a lot of people found the Winchester family portrait odd and upsetting, but it symbolizes something I’ll get to in a bit. Instead of trying to avoid his grief, Sam has moments where he lets it wash over him. He goes and sits in the car. He’s no longer avoidant. He’s no longer running away. He’s letting his grief move through him. He’s literally sitting with it.

Soulless Puppy pointed out that the characters emotional arcs is similar to DBT. Please look through their awesome meta here.

Personally, I see them as similar to the therapy I do called ACT. Both are forms of therapy where instead of fighting against them, you accept painful emotions and allow yourself to feel them. If you don’t do that work, then you can’t stop feeling them and your fears/ghosts will always haunt you. In Swan Song, Chuck tells us that “Dean didn't want Cas to save him. Every part of him, every fiber he's got, wants to die, or find a way to bring Sam back. But he isn't gonna do either. Because he made a promise.” In 15.20, Sam initially didn’t want to let Dean go. He’s been refusing to do this since season 1. When he’s separated from Dean he lives a fake life or destroys himself/the world trying to get Dean back. There’s a moment in 15.20 where Sam looks at Dean’s guns. He wants to commit suicide, but he makes the choice to live. For the time in Sam’s life, he let Dean go and lived with his pain. He no longer ran from it. After Swan Song, Dean was unable to let Sam go. He wanted him back. After Carry On, Sam is able to do what Dean couldn’t do. He lives a life outside of Dean. What’s more, Sam has reconciled himself with his past and his family. It’s clumsy and I wish it were better shown, but having the family portrait and their parents in heaven isn’t meant to excuse the way Sam and Dean were raised. In order to move past the trauma of his relationship with his parents, Sam fully integrates them into his life. In Lebanon, Sam was able to confront and forgive his father. In doing so, he can also forgive himself. Mary asks for forgiveness too, and he grants it to her. He doesn’t forget what happened, but he’s able to move forward and leave the intergenerational cycle of violence. He’s able to raise his son, Dean, the way his brother should have been raised.

Happiness isn’t in the having, it’s in just being. It’s in just saying it.

Cas said it. Dean accepted it. Sam lived it.

I can see why people see Sam’s life after Dean as unhappy. I hated it so much because I saw it as horrible and sad the first time through. I had to sit with myself and my emotions first. I think it’s because we’ve been told by society that we have to get rid of our grief in order to be happy. The finale was showing us that it’s possible to do the opposite. [Personally I think it would’ve been better had they showed more overtly happy memories, but many of my friends saw this straight away] When I began therapy, one of the first things I learned was that there aren’t “negative” emotions. When working with our kids, we call them Big emotions. In DBT/ACT, all emotions are treated as normal and natural. Grief, anger, sadness, etc, these are all normal parts of the human existence. We don’t need to run from them in order to have happiness. We can live with them. As interstitial said in our chats, “you can't change the past, you can only change your relationship to it. To accept that your past contained both love and heartache, to miss it, but also know you can do better; that's actual recovery, as good as it gets.” As Soulless-Puppy explained to me, Sam lived in duality. Dean was dead, but Sam lived. Sam was happy, but he grieved. Dean was with him in the watch and the car and his son, but Dean also waited for him in heaven. I hated the finale the first time I saw it, then next watched it with my boyfriend who loved it. As we were watching together and discussing it, I realized that Dean’s death scene wasn’t just about him, but about the show itself.

Dean promising Sam that he will be with Sam in Sam’s heart is also the show promising us that they will never leave it. That’s why Alex kept posting “The end has no end.” Just as Sam carried Dean with him in his heart, we will carry the show with us. I hope this helps. It’s a terrible thing to feel upset about an ending and thinking of the show this way, recognizing these patterns, is bringing me peace. I still have issues with how it was written, but now that I see what they were doing, I wish all the more that they had the chance to do it right. Please share your thoughts and experiences. I love hearing different opinions. Next up, Dean. Then Castiel.

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