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c0smiclatt3 · 15 hours

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university!danheng headcanons

⋆.˚ ☾ .⭒˚ TAGS: fluff, gn reader, university au

another migration from my sideblog. enjoy :)

A history major, and one of those ones that can churn out 8 page essays so fast everyone wonders if he’s actually a computer in a human suit. He hops in and out of lectures so fast, his day moves like clockwork. For all his previous classmates care, he probably is.

Has the *absolute bare minimum* in his backpack: laptop. tablet. id. charger. a *singular mechanical pencil*.

+ Has been using the same mechanical pencil he’s been using since middle school.

Brings a thermos to school that he only ever fills with tea. Coffee makes him too buzzy and he’s not a fan of the smell.

Mutters under his breath to himself in frustrated Chinese when he’s stumped. Also whispers to himself in Chinese when doing mental math.

Because he’s always got either a book or his phone in one hand he does that *thing* where he unzips his zip up hoodies by biting down on the collar and tugging on the zipper with his hand. it gets him lots of stares, but he never notices, and if he does, is probably wondering what they’re looking at.

He ended up becoming your library crush. You went to borrow a charger from the library desk on a day he had a shift. You can’t say the library is your most favorite place on campus, but suddenly you started “forgetting” to charge your laptop overnight so you could have an excuse to see him again. He’s started to anticipate your arrival every day he’s on the job.

One day he isn’t the one at the desk when you arrive. You ask for a charger like always and the guy at the desk says they’re fresh out. That’s when you saw him, swooping in and handing you a charger before taking his spot behind the desk. “Sorry about that. late lecture. here.”

That particular day you spent a bit longer at the library than usual, so by the time you were leaving he was off the job. You hand the charger back, and the guy at the desk looks at you, frowning. “Is this your own charger?” You shake your head, confused. “This charger is a personal charger, it doesn’t have a library sticker on it. Where’d you find this?”

One day you’re doing some research in the library, and go to put one of the books you took back in its shelf. A hand reaches out from behind you as you’re about to slot it back in, gently taking it from you. Your hands meet - for just a moment - and you whip your head back around, startled. You think it may just be your memory going fuzzy now, but when you turn around to see him you swear his cheeks flushed pink for a moment. “Um. This is the wrong shelf.” He nodded, and then he was gone.

Weird. Now that you think of it, you’re pretty certain it was the right one.

writing masterlist | bot masterlist

⋆.˚ ☾ .⭒˚ AN: can u tell im in uni...

#danheng #dan heng #hsr #honkai star rail #hsr x reader #honkai star rail x reader #danheng x reader #dan heng x reader #hsr headcanons #hsr imagines #hsr imagine #hsr headcanon #honkai star rail headcanon #hsr au #honkai star rail au #writing by junie

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cosyvelvetorchid · 2 days

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Prompt: Buck and Tommy asking Maddie to be their surrogate.

I LOVED writing this one so much. I may actually add it to Ao3 as a oneshot.

I genuinely made myself cry at the end!

I hope you enjoy it! ❤️

It's funny how life works. You think you have a handle on things; that you know where things are headed, and then God, or the universe or something throws you a curveball. A big, giant, cruise ship shaped curveball, with enough power to turn your life completely upside down and give you exactly what you needed despite you having no idea you needed it.

Buck thought he would spend his whole life on the hamster wheel. The endless song and dance of dating, thinking he'd found someone he could be happy with, then they leave. And he loses enough couch.

Tommy had spent a lifetime hiding. Years of repressing who he was to protect himself. And when he finally came into his own and accepted who he was, it was too late. He'd resigned himself to the fact that he would be alone.

And then the captain of the 118 needs help and 2 people who - somehow despite having the job, the city they live in and people they know in common - had never actually met, flew into a hurricane together and everything changed.

Six months later they're sharing keys to eachothers homes.

One year and Buck is moving into Tommy's house.

And, 18 months in, when Tommy finally comes home from a month in the hospital - including 6 days in a coma where Buck thought he might actually lose the love of his life - after a helicopter crash, Buck barely makes it 5 minutes before proposing.

Two years and they're standing on Tommy's deck exchanging rings in front of everyone they love. They saw no point in waiting - they knew they wanted to spend the rest of their lives together.

Three years in and they want to take the next big step. This one, however, was the biggest. The most terrifying: a family.

They'd spoken to a couple of surrogacy agencies but something was missing. Somehow they made it all seem so clinical. A business transaction. On top of that, in their research they had come across some horror stories of surrogate parents wanting to keep the baby despite it not being genetically theirs.

They talked and talked and talked about what options they had. And then Buck had remember something Connor had said about the reason they chose him as a sperm doner - they wanted someone they knew.

The answer was quite simple really. It was asking the question that was going to be difficult.

Three years and four months in they're sat in Maddie and Chimneys living room, nerves vibrating through they're entire bodies waiting for Maddie to say something.

"What?"

"We want to know if you would consider being a surrogate for us." Buck repeated.

"I.. Buck... I.. that's..." Maddie couldn't quite process what was being asked.

"Look, you know that we've been talking to agencies and trying to find the right one and sure they seem all above board and I'm sure that we could eventually find someone to help us build our family. But then it hit me - there's nobody on earth I.. we would trust to grow and nurture our baby more than you. Maddie you're a wonderful mother and I know that if you did agree to this that he or she would be loved and cared for and protected so much while their growing." He stopped to take a big breath. "But, we know its a huge ask, and you have as much time as you need to think about-"

"Yes." Maddie interrupted.

"What?"

Buck, Tommy and Chimney all sat forward to look at her.

"Evan, you are the most amazing little brother anybody could ever have. And you've been through so much in your life; so much pain and trauma and, all I ever wanted for you was to be happy. And then I found out you and my stupid husband were going to fly into a hurricane and I was so scared - and mad-" She added scowling at Chimney "-but you came back and not alone." She looked at Tommy fondly. "You found someone who makes you truly happy, and I have never been more proud or happy for you." She wiped a tear from her eye.

"So, if I can do this one thing for you, to make you even happier, then of course I will do it."

Buck wiped his own tears away that had started falling somewhere around the helicopter part.

"Really?" Buck said, not quite believing it. His chin was shaking and more tears threatened.

"Are you sure?" Tommy added. Maddie leant forward reaching out for each of their hands.

"I love you both. I'm sure."

Buck practically through himself at her, enveloping her into a hug.

"Thank you Maddie. For everything. My whole life."

"Hey I wanna get in on this." Tommy interrupted, gently peeling Buck from his sister so he could hug her.

"I don't know what else to say other than thank you. So so much."

Four years and 2 months in and they get the phone call. The bag has been packed by the door for weeks, the nursery decorated for a month and 2 men, wildly in love with other, who couldn't imagine life without the others existence, were on the way to meet they're baby.

***

They chose not to tell anybody that Maddie was in labour. They knew they would get nothing but an outpouring of love, but they wanted to spend a little while - even if it was only a few hours, thanks to Howard i cant keep a damn secret Han - after the baby was born to enjoy the moment as a family. However, there was one person Buck did call.

Bobby arrived at the hospital and sat in the labor and delivery waiting area. After a few minutes, Buck turns a corner; a tiny bundle in his arms wrapped in a pale yellow blanket. Bobby immediately walked over with a smile.

"Hey cap. I wanted to introduce you to someone.. meet our daughter - Brook Maddie Kinard."

Bobby stared at Buck for a moment, not quite fully comprehending what he had heard.

"Brook that.. that was my daughters name.."

"I know." Buck smiled softly. "We wanted to name her after you, and Bobby is a gender neutral name, but having two of you might get confusing, so we chose Brook instead. Is.. is that okay?"

Bobby's eyes filled with tears as he swallowed back the emotion.

"Yeah, kid. Yeah it's okay."

#buck x tommy #bucktommy #tommy kinard #911 abc #911 buck #evan buckley #911onabc #evan buck buckely #bucktommy fic #bucktommy prompts #tevan #kinley fic #thomas kinard

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eldritch-ambrosia · 3 days

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Let me hit you with my Shade!Lancelot idea, keeping in mind I haven't seen that episode of Merlin yet. (This works for both established Arwen/established Merthur and Gwencelot/Mercelot in my mind so think of it whichever way you'd like but it does focus on Lancelot, Merlin, and Arthur.)

So! Morgana creates Shade!Lancelot using Lancelot's body and sends him back to Camelot to stir up trouble. Instead of trying to just break up Arthur and Gwen, he's meant to isolate Arthur and make him believe that he can't trust anyone except for Aggravaine.

So he flirts with Gwen, takes the knights out to have fun when they should be training/distracts them, and takes Merlin's attention away from Arthur as well, frustrating Arthur.

S!Lancelot and Aggravaine both place doubts in Arthur's mind directly as well and S!Lancelot realizes that Merlin betraying Arthur would be far worse than anyone else and sets his sights on Merlin instead.

So he keeps stealing Merlin away when Arthur needs him, makes comments about how he knows Merlin better than Arthur ever could and about how he knows Merlin sneaks away but he's loyal to Merlin over Camelot (which also upsets Arthur because that's one of his knights for god's sake!) and won't tell him where Merlin is going.

Arthur confronts Merlin about his sneaking away (magic things) and, when he refuses to tell the truth, Arthur thinks he can't trust him after all.

Merlin talks about having magic in front of S!Lancelot and, when he doesn't know what Merlin's talking about, Merlin becomes suspicious. He references something that didn't happen and S!Lancelot acts like he remembers that which confirms his suspicions but when he tries to sidle away out of the room to tell someone, S!Lancelot attacks him, attempting to choke him out.

Arthur finds them like this and S!Lancelot says that Merlin was sending information to Morgana so he had to subdue him which Arthur doesn't believe for ONE SINGLE MINUTE. Thus, they begin to duel as Merlin tries to recover his breathing and stop from passing out in the corner.

S!Lancelot attempts to kill Arthur and knocks him out, Arthur fading out with the last thing he sees being Merlin trying to push S!Lancelot's killing blow away as his servant stands.

Somehow (I'm thinking earlier in the ep Merlin finds a magical crystal that can hold souls released from the afterlife that Gaius is researching and Lancelot's real soul gets released during the ep and the crystal glows and maybe gets broken in the scuffle) Merlin pushes the Shade from Lancelot's body and his real soul is able to return to his body.

The Shade's form changes into a kind of Shadow Monster Lancelot and duels the real Lancelot now (who is very shaken and weak because he was just revived!) and, when he stabs the Shade, it does no damage. The Shade laughs and says that he can't be killed without magic and Lancelot says that then he'll just have to kill it like he killed the Griffin.

"You're a knight of Camelot and you're saying that you used magic to kill a Griffin?"

"No. I did." Merlin says, casting the same spell he did all those years ago on Lancelot's blade as he stabs through the Shade, killing it.

There's a beat where Merlin still isn't sure if it's the real Lancelot and asks him something only the real Lancelot would know, which he answers and they have a tearful/huggy reunion.

Arthur wakes up and they explain that it was a creature sent by Morgana and Lancelot is actually back with them now.

Later, when Merlin is getting Arthur ready for bed, Arthur tells him that he doesn't need to know where he goes off to because he trusts him. Merlin goes to tell him the truth but stops and thanks him instead, snuffing out the candles and shutting the door as he leaves.

(I want to hopefully write this one day but I will need to actually catch up and watch the episode first to get the vibes. Everything I know about it rn is from clips and gifs and such)

#bbc merlin #merlin #lancelot #arthur pendragon #fic idea #merthur #mercelot #lancelot should be involved in every arthur love triangle #i think this story could've worked in the show with gwen becoming queen as well #(keeping in mind I haven't seen S4)#but maybe instead of this happening the day before the wedding instead it's Aggravaine and Morgana doing their takeover #so the wedding happens later #and then there's triangle stuff with both Arwen and Merthur #it could also happen without Arwen #because I think either way Morgana should've focused her attention on driving a wedge between him and Merlin #and this way!#Lancelot returns!#I'm fine with main characters dying if it's done well #*eyes the show carefully*#like i said #if it's done well #also i think every love triangle in this show can be solved by polyamory #and I'm a big Arcelot supporter #Lancthur?#idk

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another-goblin · 1 day

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One of Dr. Ratio's PhDs is in Natural Theology, where he published the work "Aeons: A Natural Phenomenon" and got hailed as the "most sacred prophet of Aeon non-theism" (basically, the way I understand it, "Aeons exist, but they are not special, they are not gods")

So it's not just "Stop worshipping geniuses yall", it's "Stop worshipping Aeons" too. Which is quite ballsy.

Then I did a little research about the meaning of "non-theism", and it can mean different things, but look at this quote I found on the "non-theism" Wiki page (by Pema Chödrön, a Buddhist nun):

Theism is a deep-seated conviction that there's some hand to hold […] Non-theism is relaxing with the ambiguity and uncertainty of the present moment without reaching for anything to protect ourselves […] Nontheism is finally realizing there is no babysitter you can count on.

Does this remind you of something?

Dr. Ratio: ...but even a life marked by failure is a life worth living — it is only in moments of solitude and despair, when help is absent, that fools grasp how to pick themselves up.

Basically the same idea: don't rely on these higher beings who don't care about you; you'll do better if you realize that you are on your own.

BTW, the aeons who get personally involved in human affairs tend to do more harm than good, so whether they are actually worth worshipping is a good question for another time.

But returning to the 'Aeon non-theist' thing. What is funnier, him writing this paper after not being accepted into GS (totally not being bitter about failing to get the attention of a certain someone, nope) or before (I wouldn't be surprised by Nous' reaction. "Oh wow. F you too, dude. No Genious Society for you")

On a slightly unrelated note, what "being recognized by Nous" entails anyway? It's not about being an emanator or belonging to the path of Erudition, it's used as a euphymism for "being invited to Geniuos Society." Is Nous involved in it at all? Do they decide whom to invite? Do they send a magical letter to the chosen ones? Imagine Nous considering Ratio but immediately noping out because he's clearly Lan's guy.

But what if Nous isn't involved? What if there's a boring commission that decides whom to invite to GS and then proclaims it as "someone has attracted the gaze of Nous". So again, imagine them considering Ratio, ever-hyperactive, getting 8 PhDs, making discoveries left and right, and teaching dozens of courses. Now imagine him finally being invited to GS: getting a GIANT confidence boost and having access to the Guild resources, starting, like, 10 Simulated Universe-sized projects at the same time. GS just wouldn't be able to handle it.

PS: I'm aware of (and agree with) the prevailing theory that he wasn't invited because he wasn't just seeking knowledge for the sake of knowledge, something something. So don't take the last part too seriously, I'm just being silly.

#my stuff #dr ratio #but also #'most sacred prophet' lol

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skayafair · 3 days

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Daaaaaaaaaamn this boy has absolutely no idea how to process his feelings *head in hands*

^ this is about episode 4 ending by the way

And, well, yes, Crystal does refocus any talk about others' problems to hers, okay. Usually there's at least a bridge of "yeah I get you, it's really rough" before sharing your own experience to connect, but she just goes straight to "And I...". Which... honestly she has every right to, but it's also her old self talking, yes.

I'm a bit stuck on Charles' "I cant help her, I can't help you, I can't help anyone or anything" because. It's so damn familiar. It's not that he can't help anyone - he does so plenty. It's not even that he can't SAVE anyone - they DO. But he can't see this, because the ones the closest to him are the ones he cannot save. This isn't about helping, that's a fucking saviour complex. An "if I'm not useful or helpful they don't need me", only just "helping" has never been enough now, has it? It's never enough, whatever you do. Moral support or help with research, little daily things are help, too. But it doesn't count. It has to be big, something you can't overlook, and it has to be final, to make who you're trying to save happy, forever. Only it's not possible. That's why the saviour complex is so bad - you can't save someone whose life is not over over completely, forever. You can only help bit by bit, but it won't ever be enough for you, because it has never been enough for someone big and important in your life, someone from family.

I kinda knew where exactly my - the same - issues stemmed from but never looked at it from this specific angle. I didn't connect the dots at first because Charles had an actual physically abusive parent while for mine it's just narcissistic tendences, but. Honestly the general outline is too familiar and I was tiggered and more perceptive today so yeah, thanks again for the insight, DBD.

The feeling of "I can't help my best friend, I can't help my family, I can't help anyone or anything, so what's even the point of me at all?" is too familiar. And I believe the show didn't create a resolution for Charles' problem, more like put it on hold because there were more pressing matters at hand. If we get season 2, I hope it developes this theme further. I need someone to tell him "your worth has nothing to do with this".

Speaking of which, I can't help being astonished at how psychologically accurate and nuanced the show is. With all the characters, really, but Charles' case is the most obvious, I think. The way he's always drawn to the same kind of people and - wow, Charles, that was unusually perceptive! - even noticed it himself? What he didn't notice yet is that this is the kind of people not only with similar personality traits, but also unavailable. Edwin's metaphorical walls, Crystal being alive and honestly just not very interested? Both are rather rude and I couldn't help noticing how uncomfortable Charles often looks when either of his sweethearts is at it again. I could almost see the cogs in his head turning, figuring out how to balance out yet another moody fit of theirs, be it Edwin or Crystal. And not being offended by obvious insults? Hell, Crystal noticed it right away. Yeah he's used to it with Edwin but that's not normal??? There's nothing good about it??? Have some self-worth, boy!

And. Well. Chasing after an unavailable partner is a totally common thing with this kind of trauma. Toxic relationship is the only normal you know. The only kind of "love" you know. If it doesn't hurt even a little, doesn't have these highs and lows, if you don't have to accomodate another's fits - what are we even talking about, yeah?

Charles is honestly lucky though. Edwin tries to be nicer, amitting his flaws, and generally they are pretty well-balanced and keep growing together (but there's always room for developement). Crystal is doing her best and is caring all over as well. The intent is there and it's good at its heart.

But I'm still waiting for the resolution. "You're the best man I've ever known" doesn't cut it.

Also it would be REALLY interesting to see Charles' developement in s2 because while Crystal is probably still off-limits due to the whole the living and the dead thing (and she wants to be friends), Edwin has opened up. Are there going to be any changes in this regard, because this isn't even about romantic or platonic and the orientation, it's about the dynamic in whole? Or is this going to be glossed over? I mean, when Crystal was being emotionally available as a friend - same episode 4 - Charles got angry fot prying. He doesn't know how to deal with all this but has made some progress. Will we see more of it?

We need season 2 SO. BAD.

#dead boy detectives #charles rowland

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ur-loser-gf · 2 days

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My intro!!!!!!!

hewo!!! im ur loser gf who asks way too many stupid questions:3

(i looked up online where a place like this is and tumblr showed up! im new to it but i did my research and i do hope i can make a new home here:) i heard thats lots of young girls go here to get attention so im sorry if im not welcome!

also imSOO sorry my into is so long im new to this! i tried to make it pretty though!

me - 🌸

this account - 🌺

rules - 🌹

Me!

🌸 name: worthless excuses like me don’t get names:(

🌸 age: biologically 18 but i haven’t been keeping track and i’m stupider than a 9 year old >~<

🌸 location: im from the west but i belong in my room where no one can see me!

🌸 pronouns/gender: im female but im not good enough to be an actual woman, stupid things like me don’t have genders, so it/it’s pronouns are fitting and the best for me!:)

🌸 my sexuality: i don’t deserve to be with anyone but im open to anyone of any gender!

🌸 my physical description:

- blondish brown hair

- blue eyes (not the pretty kind, the dead kind)

- white and extremely pale coz i never go outside

- a bit chubby (130 pounds last time i checked) but im on a diet and doing my best to lose weight (tho im still and always will be gross)

- im also 5’5

- i have big boobs but i hate them

- idk how big my ass is but nothing special

- my thighs are pretty thick but not in a good way

🌸 my mental description

- im really stupid and rightfully hate myself for it

- im psychotic, i have anger issues, and borderline personality disorder

- im super obsessive and the more i like someone the more i let them do whatever they want to me

- but also it can be difficult to earn my trust (think of me like a bunny, weak, fragile, and frightened, only im not cute)

- i have an ed and i sh but i don’t like starving anymore because im incredibly malnourished, i also don’t have a way to cut :(

- i have no friends (wonder why lmao) but when i was younger older men online would always be so kind to me! so now i kinda depend on them:P

- i hate me and everyone else (you) should also!

This Account!

🌺 this accounts purpose: this blog is self harm first and lust second! most stuff doesn’t turn me on and i just use it as a way to hurt myself (by either making me uncomfortable or it hurting my feelings, etc)

🌺 purple text: self harm, vents, or anything along that nature that doesn’t involve my lust:)

🌺 pink text: me horny posting, meaning it’s something that actually does turn me on!

🌺all activity is welcome: dms, asks, anons are and always will be open to anything! go off and do whatever you want! just don’t break the rules hehe! but unsolicited dick pics and stuff like that are okay!

🌺 my interests on this account: im open to all kinks! this is just because while i have personal kinks, what i want doesn’t matter and my pain is good! so i have no sexual limits besides maybe a serious form of pain that hurts *other people* that isn’t me, like a misogyny kink for example, im not okay with, only because im not the only one hurt by misogyny! i don’t want anyone else to hurt:( only me, only i deserve to hurt.

🌺 my activity: im active the most after 7 pm, i gotta try n act like im sane, normal, human, and like a girl or else i’ll be found out! (well i rarely go out or talk to ppl but just in case.. im like batman teehee) and i log off at 10 pm (est)

🌺 when i post: because i have soo many thoughts and really don’t wanna spam and bother people:( and because i love schedule and rly like the scheduling/drafting system on tumblr, i put my thoughts into drafts n when im ready (brave enough) i schedule them for a specific time!:) every 30 minutes starting at 7 pm and ending at 10 pm (est) there should be a new post!:D so if im ever inactive but somehow still posting that’s why:)

Rules!

🌹 Ima have to put on a serious face for this but i feel i need to now because im generally bad at boundaries. absolutely NO rule breaking, under any circumstances. i am the holder of this account and i will block you if i deem it absolutely necessary. i don’t have many rules but im EXTREMELY strict when it comes to them (and i’ve tried but there’s no way i’ll be getting rid of them) so best case scenario, rule breakers will only receive a block, thank you for those who abide by the rules i love you:)

🌹 no racism, transphobia, homophobia, xenophobia, or sexism of any kind on my blog, this is a safe place for everyone. an extremely important thing to note is that i hate myself, degrade myself, hurt myself, let others use me, etc *not* because i’m female, but because of who i am as a creature. my sex and gender have nothing to do with it. please respect that simple fact.

🌹i don’t send. i can imagine that if i were to get close to someone i’ll send them any pictures they want (it’s certainly a possibility but it’s hard to gain my trust). so regardless of your reasons, i will not be posting or sending any pictures of myself that include my face or nudity. my body belongs to my future lover (deity) anyway.

🌹i don’t give out other socials. this one is simple, if i want to i’ll give you my discord but it’s highly rare so please don’t ask:)

🌹NO KIDS NO EXCEPTIONS. anyone under 18 is not welcome here it isn’t good for you, it isn’t even good for me.

🌹if you get triggered by any dark topics (drugs, rape, pedophilia, grooming, ed’s, sh, or anything really) please block me, the idea of hurting someone because of this account hurts me genuinely:(

🌹i will likely add more rules in the future but i’ll make sure to blog about it!

🌹 sorry for all the strictness n stuff i don’t like being firm or anything like that but i believe it’s necessary unless i get so overwhelmed and end up deleting my account within days:(

i’ll likely revise my intro in the future!:) please give me tips on how to make it or me better if you have any!<3

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divine-donna · 17 hours

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burnt out passions

because i watched the red shoes and this idea just popped into my head.

tashi duncan they can never make me hate you. i am a tashi duncan defender until i die. (sorry art)

character: tashi duncan

context: stanford. 2007 - 2008.

you and tashi understood one thing: passion was everything.

your lives revolved around your passions. for her, it was the sport of tennis. and for you, it was the dance of ballet.

your step-father was quite rich, bringing you and your parental figure out of poverty. it was through him that you started going to tennis matches. and you were a fan of tashi duncan.

she was meant to be a star. she was meant to go far. she was meant to have that grand slam career title that most, if not all, tennis players envied.

you always admired her from afar. but when you walked into class on your first day of class in your freshman year, you were not expecting to see tashi duncan.

the class was your typical writing 101 class, the kind that was meant to prepare students on research and how to write. within the class were workshops. after all, part of making a good essay was to proofread and have everything peer reviewed.

"you have a great voice."

your paper was dumped in front of you. there were barely any corrections on it. just a lot of underlining and side notes. looking up, you saw the woman that was tashi duncan.

"thanks." you hand her paper over to her.

tashi flips through it. she sees a lot of doodles on her paper that express your annotations through speech and thought bubbles.

"i also thought your voice was great. your passion for tennis really comes through. although i think having seen you play enhanced the reading experience."

"so...you've seen me play?" she crosses her arms over her chest.

"my step-father loves tennis."

"fun. i learned some new things in your paper. you really like ballet?"

"ideally i'd like to be professional. but who knows how stable that is." in comparison to being a famous tennis player. "which is why i'm here. to get a degree in...something."

tashi glances down. you're wearing red shoes. "so...do you wear red because of the movie you mentioned?"

"maybe. it's been a thing since i was a kid."

a small smile begins to curl on her face. "you wanna get lunch?"

"so you do ballet? do your feet ever hurt?"

"all the time." your feet hurt just thinking about dancing again. "i can't imagine my life without ballet."

"i can relate to that." she lifts her cup up and you gently tap your own against hers.

"you should come to the show. we're having one near the end of the semester."

"so soon? we just got here."

"i need to train. keep my muscles flexible and ready."

"you should try tennis. you might actually be really good at it." ballet took a ton of control and coordination. tennis would be a perfect sport for you. or, at least, a decent fit.

"i tried. i'm terrible at hitting balls with a racket."

"who said you had to be good?"

"i would like to think that if i'm playing with tashi duncan...at least i should be mediocre."

you became one of tashi's favorite people to hang out with. and you were also her favorite gym partner. your schedules just lined up perfectly.

every time you guys went to work out, you would lead the stretches beforehand.

sometimes, you guys would visit the dance studio and you would teach her some basic moves. when your finger tips grazed her arm, she would shudder. you were careful when touching her and asked her all the time if you could hold her waist.

"you don't need to ask (y/n)! we're friends." tashi has that soft look in her eyes. she always looked at you with those eyes.

"still!" you say. "don't want to make you uncomfortable."

"you won't! you could never."

you took a deep breath when she said that, trying to ignore the heat beginning to swirl in your body. your body so close to hers. her smile. her smooth skin. her voice. and her smelled.

she always smelled divine.

tashi never knew ballet could be so intense.

she came with art to the show, holding a bouquet of flowers. you had been working hard and she wanted to make sure your efforts were acknowledged and received by her.

you moved with such precision and fluidity. she swore you turned into a blur.

your body was nimble. and that outfit...well, she could see your body. she had a boyfriend. but you were right there and a lot more present than patrick, who was currently on tour.

she has to push the thoughts aside, not noticing the fact that art sees the way she looks at you.

"you were fucking amazing!"

you were surprised when you feel just how hard she hugs you. she squeezes almost a little too tight.

and yet, you accept it. you lean into it and savor her touch.

"thanks for coming tashi. i saw you in the crowd."

finally, tashi lets you go. she takes the flowers from art. you could feel your face heat up. "t-tashi...you didn't have to."

"nonsense!" she playfully hits your arm. "you worked hard. remember that breakdown you had?" a small laugh leaves you when thinking about it.

it happened at the dance studio in the gym. you guys were stretching and all the emotions from midterms, finals projects, and your upcoming lead role came crashing down.

"you deserve it. you were amazing. if you're not hired when you get out of college..." she shakes her head. but she cannot stop grinning.

you bought flowers for tashi. it was the first game of the season. her and art have been training for this. and you were excited to see her play not as a spectator, but as her friend!

earlier during the week, you had convened with art to try to pick out which bought to get her and exactly how big.

when you got there though, it was just art. you were expecting to see another white boy. and you sit on art's right. "so...what happened to patrick?"

you wanted to see for yourself who tashi duncan's boyfriend was. who exactly managed to bag tashi duncan? you wanted to meet him. not that you were jealous...

but you were.

art leans back in the seat. "he's not coming. him and tashi had a fight."

you frown and continue holding the flowers. "...he sounds like an ass."

"tell me about it."

when tashi tore her acl on the court, you swore you could feel the pain in your own leg. a sort of phantom feeling.

you were frozen, trying to determine if what you saw truly happened.

art was quicker than you, rushing down and even jumping over the net.

you're walking to the infirmary room when you can hear the argument.

"out! out!"

"listen-" says the guy with messy dark hair. he looks disheveled. and like shit.

"patrick get the fuck out of here!"

you've never heard art yell. ever. he never even raised his voice.

patrick seems defeated and he abides by them, leaving. his eyes meet yours. "nice flowers." he notices the card attached to a string.

For the best tennis player I know: TASHI ♡

"have fun. now's your chance too. but you should know. art's restless."

you clench your jaw and walk past him. art was right. he was an ass.

tashi glances at the door when your head pops in. she doesn't say anything, but her shoulders slouch a little bit. you take it as a sign to come in and walk over to her side.

she looks at the flowers and at the card attached to the string. "i don't deserve those."

"if anyone deserves flowers...it's you." you could feel your eyes tearing up. you feel her pain. you understand her frustration. and most importantly, you feel her devastation.

tashi takes the flowers from your hands, her fingers touching your own. she takes a deep breath and inhales their scent. it was nice. you chose a good bouquet.

little did you know that it was the death of her career. and you had brought flowers to her funeral.

your next role was a challenging one. it had you straining your legs every day while you trained, trying to get your tempo right. nothing seemed to work though.

the stress of midterms also didn't help. you had a lot of work on your plate. many papers, almost too many exams. you didn't sleep much. you couldn't sleep.

tashi felt some guilt towards you helping her. you were taking time out of your own day to get her back into shape.

you were her cheerleader. you believed that she could heal and return to the court. you helped her with her exercises, woke up early to go to her room and help her stretch.

her frustration continued to boil over when she couldn't do the things she wanted to do.

not only was she a failure, but she was also letting you down.

"are you disappointed in me?"

you look at her as you stretch her leg for her. it was bent beneath you and you're careful when adding the pressure. she's staring up at the ceiling.

it was still dark outside.

"i could never be disappointed in you."

"don't bullshit me (y/n)."

"i mean it tashi. i could never be disappointed in you." she looks at you. there are tears threatening to spill.

"...i'm afraid my only skill is hitting a ball with a racket." and that without it, she was nothing. you didn't need her to voice it. you could see it in her eyes, in her posture, in her demeanor.

"no. it is not. you're tashi motherfucking duncan. you're smart, you're gorgeous, and you're ambitious. you can write! you're great at organizing! you give awesome advice! and most importantly, you get shit done. if anything tries to stop you, you find a way around it. and you see to it that you have a way to participate."

her heart skips a beat.

"you're kissing my ass." a smile cracks on her face.

you wanted to tell her that you loved her. it threatened to spill from your tongue.

"i would love to."

tashi laughs, covering her face with her hands. she takes the opportunity to wipe away her tears as you pull her leg back into a resting position.

"today's dress rehearsal, right?" she sits up as you stand and grab some of the bottles of gatorade you put in her fridge to keep cold.

"yeah. you don't have to come if you're not up for it."

tashi gently rubs her knee before looking up at you. "i could use the time to rest."

"is art coming?"

tashi purses her lips. "art and i...aren't really talking anymore..."

you frown. "i'm sorry to hear that." you decide not to ask or push it. but part of you felt elated that he was gone. it always felt like a crowd with you and tashi. and art.

while working out and practicing earlier, you decided to ignore the throbbing pain in your hip. when tashi asks if you want to come with her for a break, you tell her that you wanted to keep training. you were close to nailing it.

you were perhaps overconfident when it came time to dress rehearsal.

at the climax of the shower, the music surging, your heart beating, your costume flaring out, you hear a loud pop. and when you land, you hear another pop.

it seemed that fate decided to fuck with you that night.

the pain in your right side was nearly unbearable.

tashi recognized that cry of pain. she heard it when she went to bed, when she reflected upon her life at night. she rises out of her seat, getting over to the stage as fast as possible.

you overexerted yourself, tearing your achilles and your labrum. at the very least, it would take you out of your role currently. at the worst, it would inhibit your movements for the rest of your life.

tashi was with you the whole time. you could only stare blankly at the x-rays.

without knowing, you're leaning towards her. until your head is against her body. she puts an arm around you, keeping you close in silent understanding.

you heard a knock at your door. ever since your injury, you had barely come out of your room, only for class and to eat to spend your dining dollars.

you groan, sitting up and carefully getting off the bed. you use your crutches and open the door. "tashi...it's late..."

tashi holds a bag of snacks and drinks. "you look like shit."

"that's because i feel like shit."

you guys were kind of matching. her in her brace and you in your splint.

you move aside to let her in and she closes the door for you. "i bought all your favorites." she says, putting the drinks into the fridge to keep them cold. she sets the bag of snacks down on your desk.

tashi watches you go back to your bed and set your crutches aside. you try your best to get onto the bed using your upper body strength, but your arms were failing you.

she walks over and gently lifts you up at your thighs while you push yourself up with your arms. it works, and you're able to sit on the mattress topped by a mattress topper.

"can't even...get on my fucking bed!" you grit your teeth. and you didn't have the strength to adjust the height of your bed either.

tashi frowns. "there's no shame in needing help." you showed her that.

"i know. i just..." you lick your lips, looking at her. "i wish i took that break. i wouldn't be in this position if i did." you sniffle.

tashi's eyes glance down at your lips before going back up. "i spend too much time worrying about the what ifs."

"i shouldn't. it's...stupid."

there's a comfortable silence between the two of you. you look at tashi. the way her hair frames her face. her big brown eyes. her lips that you desperately wanted to taste. she was still gorgeous even dressed down in her stanford sweater and athletic shorts.

she leans forward, her kiss soft and gentle.

your hand goes to rest on her neck, kissing her back.

tashi kisses you harder, her mouth moving in hungry motions. you match her pace, kissing her with just as much hunger.

you let her push you down onto the mattress so she could be on top. her hands begin to trail down your body, finding the end of your sweater. she slides her hand beneath, feeling your cool skin.

you pull away, your breathing heavy. "are you sure?" you didn't understand why tashi duncan would want to kiss you of all people. even if you wanted to kiss her.

"i'm sure." she kisses you again and you moan against her lips, letting her tongue slide past your lips and dance with your tongue.

#challengers 2024 #challengers #challengers fic #challengers x reader #tashi duncan x reader #tashi duncan #tashi donaldson #zendaya #x reader #male reader #female reader #gender neutral reader

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sinful-lanterns · 3 days

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Monster girl encyclopedia. Has all the monstergirl types you could ever want!

Aside from all the problematic things inside the Monster Girl Encyclopedia (I mean, what else do you expect from a hentai series?) I actually do rlly like the concept of the MGE, as the Monster AU does take inspo from it with the Researcher making her own guidebook for the monster women she encounters 😅

Quite a creative concept if I do say so myself!

#⛓️ interrogation complete #mge but make it sapphic lol

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horizon-verizon · 2 years

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(You know, I actually didn’t think that this was a thing that allowed and common enough to even be noteworthy. WTF?)

Definition of “Avunculate Marriages”: Basically marrying your uncle/aunt, your niece/nephew.

Legal(ized) Avunculate Marriages

New York #1 (ironically, there’s a tale about nonwhite immigrants already having such a marriage and wanting to see it legalized and not a reason for deportation)

New York #2 (criminalizing such marriages?! contradiction or difficulty detecting such unions?)

India

Canada

The Netherlands

And...

An Ancient Hawaiian Aunt-Nephew Marriage

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aroacewxs · 7 months

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im not romance or sex repulsed, im romance and sex curious. romance and sex inquisitive. im a little scientist jotting down notes and connecting dots to dots in my head, trying to figure out this little puzzle that is attraction and romantic/sexual gestures because one of the worst things to me personally is feeling confused

#jay does a think #aromantic #asexual #actually aromantic #actually asexual #aroace #aspec #acespec #arospec #i go through ups and downs where i am just so fascinated by it all #or i think it's the grossest most unnecessary thing to ever exist #but altogether i feel like a spectator in any scenario i try to picture myself in #researching about it not to conform but to learn lol please don't get the wrong idea #anthropology is fascinating

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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 6 months

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💙❤️Happy Holidays!❤️💙

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #lan wangji #wei wuxian #This is *specifically* fanart of the interfaith christmas cards featuring santa and his jewish rabbi husband spending time together #Why? Well as I was trying to think of things to draw for the season I realized there was another classic Blue and Red pairing to reference #They are going out for chinese food after this photoshoot. Kosher of course.#I want them to star in an interfaith hallmark film. A meet cute + save christmas + murder mystery in a small town kind of story #Or! Maybe they are just going to have a chill holiday break together and bake some treats with the extended family #So many fun possibilities about this bonkers concept I have no intention of making a bigger deal out of #speaking of Big Deals though;#If you have ever wanted to show appreciation for this (free) daily comics blog then I have one Holiday request:#If you have the means to - please donate your money to either a local food bank or a Yemen relief fund #there are so many people going without food and every bit helps. Truly would be the best holiday treat ever #and if you do not celebrate this holiday season…it’s also my birthday! You wouldnt want to let down the birthday cat would you?#(DISCLAIMER: it may or may not actually be my birthday. I may just be pressing emotional buttons to influence people to my cause)#(DISCLAIMER 2: I cannot vouch for any charities you donate to. Please be cautious and research properly before donating)

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stuckinapril · 3 months

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It’s never overstated to me when people are like “work out bc it makes you feel better” bc it literally does. I think what I used to get hung up on is making the perfect schedule / wanting to know what I was doing right away. But it’s also okay to flounder at first and experiment w things and figure out what works for you and your body. The important thing is you’re starting out bc your body really will thank you for it later down the line. You cannot keep pushing it off it will add up

#“Work out not bc you hate your body but bc u love it” is the truest statement ever #I also don’t think a gym membership is needed bc I know straight up athletes who only ever do bodyweight workouts #It helps me so that’s why I have one but it’s by no means necessary #I still do at home workouts at times bc I think they’re rly fun and a nice switch up #And just playing around and finding out what works for me but what also challenges me #I don’t think I perfected it yet but I’m doing lots of research & experimenting w things & I also just love the endorphins it gives me #My friend and I are ab to start regularly biking through nature trails & I think that will be so therapeutic for me bc I usually just #Work out at the gym/at home. It’ll be a nice little addition #And buying cute workout two pieces actually motivates me to work out too they make me feel like a Pinterest girl fr

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writeouswriter · 1 year

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I love how ominous such basic names like "The Organization" or "The Institute" or "The Initiative" or "The Facility" or etc. are when placed in like a shady sci-fi context, like there's no reason for them to sound that suspicious, but without elaboration, it's like here is a place where they are doing things™ and I am like ooohh, because the blank state, the refusal to give you any more detail makes you think they're hiding something on purpose and leaves the darkest corner of the imagination left to fill in the rest.

#writing #writeblr #names #i want to give my shady research facilities in my stories actual names but some part of me is like #you'll never get the level of unease you get from just naming it the institute rather than the x institute or something #sci-fi #other genres i guess too but usually sci-fi #the barn in haven why is that the scariest sounding thing ever like?#you just know that thing ain't a barn #it is a barn physically outside but oh the creep factor that name gives i can't explain #the shop in firestarter? like f*ck it conjures up images of a workshop and saws building and tearing apart people for some reason #the initiative in buffy it's so nondescript and unassuming just like its soldiers living among the campus and the military power they hold #etc etc etc you know #mayhaps i am not creative enough to come up with better names also mayhaps

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werewolf-transgenderism · 11 months

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back from my hermitage to drop off more medievalisms, here you go besties (prints)

#i think this is the best thing i’ve ever made tbh #i did actual research and based it off of a real book of hours. down to the script even #anyway. back to my hermitage byeeee #ofmd #our flag means death #my art

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flowercrowngods · 2 months

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thinking thoughts™️ again about another fic that’s way too real, and pictured eddie giving steve that understanding smile, saying , “yeah, changing the world gets a little old, doesn’t it, when the cost is your sanity.”

and steve mirrors him with a slight nod, “and when you realise you just wanna live your own life, not change everyone else’s. i feel like people shouldn’t need to take this long to realise that.”

“it’s the system, steve-o.” eddie fishes a cigarette from the pack, offering one to steve, who shakes his head with a polite smile. “people living their lives. what a rebellious thing to ask.”

steve watches him for a second, and it’s like he’s piecing together some kind of picture around him. eddie lets him; somehow he trusts steve not to get it all wrong. “you going to rehab to stick it to the man, hm?”

eddie takes a long drag of his cigarette, his eyes far away as he lets the smoke fall from his lips. “no. ‘m going to rehab because it took me too long to realise that i just wanna live my life. and because i think… because i think i’m actually ready. sounds so dumb, doesn’t it?”

“nah.” and steve sounds like he means it. eddie gets the feeling that he does. steve strikes him as someone who’s too genuine for his own good. maybe that’s his own way to keep changing the world even without that job. “sounds like you actually know what you’re talking about. that’s a good quality, you know? to get better. wanting to get better. for no one but yourself.”

“now you’re the one who sounds like he knows what he’s talking about.”

steve huffs and stuffs his hands into his pocket. “nah, man. i’m just the homeless guy who’s hot for your apartment and wants you out of the house asap so i can start my life. with your cat.”

eddie laughs as he snuffs out the cigarette beneath his boot. the keys dangle in his hand as he holds them out to steve, who looks at him, surprised.

“well, she’s yours, then.”

#i shan’t speak about this any more bc i gotta do a social experiment of actually finishing a fic before posting it 🤡#and also it won’t even go that hard. but also might turn into the realest thing i’ll have ever written so maybe idk #steddie #steddie fic #she’s been in my head all day i need to research my thesis but i’m thinking about these two and the realities of them and ugh #someone save me from ANOTHER wip

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skitskatdacat63 · 6 months

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Fernando Alonso & His Relationship With Cards

I'm sure we're all familar with the cards on the back of Fernando's Vegas GP helmet by now, but did you know his relationship with cards goes a lot deeper?

I. Magic Tricks

You've probably seen or heard someone at least mention Fernando's propensity for card tricks. As far as I can tell he was doing them(publically) as far back as 2003 all the way to as recently as 2018. Even once performing a card trick, with a condom and a teddy bear(!??!?!??!!), in front of Valentino Rossi who said "How was that possible?"(x)

But how did this start? According to James Allen, "Fernando admits to having been heavily influenced by his grandfather, a mercurial figure, who taught him magic and card tricks, still one of his passions away from the race track."(x) And I'm not sure the validity of this one, because I couldn't find an actual source, but apparently he once said: "My parents are responsible for the two things I like doing most - driving and magic tricks. They bought me my first go-kart and a magician's kit."

In several interviews he described it as his hobby off track, and that he loved learning new tricks and surprising others in the garage with them! So clearly cards are pretty important to him both as a hobby but also to who he is as a person since they've been with him just as long as racing has.

II. Card Symbolism in His Helmets

This is the reason I originally made this post, but I thought I should also explain the origins of his card fascination first. As I said, we probably all remember the cards on the back of his helmet in Vegas, but did you know that wasn't the first time he had cards on the back of his helmet?

From 2008-2013, he used to have a pair of cards on the back of his helmets. The symbolisms of the cards themselves as well as the evolution of their design is really fascinating to me! Even more so with the recent development of the card choice in 2023.

Fernando said he wanted to reference his two titles in some way on the back of his helmet and after his friend sent him several ideas, he decided on having two cards(an ace of clubs and an ace of hearts, sometimes pictured with 05 and 06 on them as well), saying: "I picked the cloverleaf [the ace of clubs - Ed] to give me luck, but the only pity is that it doesn't have four leaves!"(X)

2008.

Here's the very first appearance of the cards! They're displayed flat, with the 05 and 06 clearly visible

2009.

Very similar to 2008, but with a slightly different design, and they're maybe a bit more straight with less shadow?

2010.

This is the first major change! I was sad they didn't have the years on them anymore, but then I realized they're sparkly to match with his signature lightning bolts on the top of the helmet!!

2011.

Honestly I'm still somewhat unsure if this is the actual 2011 helmet? It's pretty difficult to find clear photos of the back of helmets from older seasons. It's easiest to find them on replica sites or auction sites so I'm not 100%? But anyways, I like that this has the championship years on the underside of the cards

2012.

This is when I started getting weirdly emotional about the helmets. Do you see how they've progressed from being a centerpoint to being curled up and sad at the bottom of the helmet? Not listing the year anymore??

2013.

Same thoughts as 2012. And after this season, they cease to exist (just like his ferrari chair in the garage, WOAH CALLBACK), until cards make a reeappearance in his Vegas helmet, albeit in a different form

2013 Monaco(Honorable Mention):

For some reason 2013 helmets were easier to find proper pictures of, so I happened to witness this absolute beauty. The creativity of this helmet genuinely blows me away??? Wanting to keep the card motif, but making sure to incorporate it into the rest of the puzzle piece design?? Mwah! There was another special 2013 helmet but they didn't change the cards at all so I really applaud this one

2023 Las Vegas(The Return of The King):

The magnificent return! But look! The cards are different cards! Instead of being two aces, it's now an ace of hearts, a four of hearts(his driver number of course!) and, the, now iconic, representation of himself as a Joker. I literally could not believe my eyes when this helmet was released and I saw the Joker card, what a fucking silly old man....I really wonder if he felt nostalgic having cards on his helmet again or if he didn't think about it all and was just like, "ah cards because Vegas!!!"

III. Why Does This Matter?

*The rest of the post was factual, this is moreso my personal thoughts on the symbolism of the cards/designs

This post spawned from me recently watching the 2010 Bahrain gp and noticing "hey wait a minute...are those CARDS ON THE BACK OF HIS HELMET!?" It's a really tiny detail that's unfortunately covered up by the HANS device pretty much whenever he's wearing the helmet, so it's really difficult to spot! But I became fascinated with the fact that he had cards on his helmet before that recent helmet, and now here we are!

There's something to me about how the design of the cards evolves over the course of six seasons from the cards being front and center to being smaller, more folded up and closer to the bottom of the helmet. As I said, the 2012-2013 ones genuinely made me depressed because it feels, symbolically, like his hopes for getting another Ace are becoming more and more unlikely and falling away until they eventually fall falt and fade away entirely after 2013 and disappear for basically a decade.

But when they return? They're not the same cards! Instead of representing Fernando's championships, they now represent him as a person, displaying his driver number and his persona of being a Joker!! Though I do think it's interesting he happened to keep the Ace of Hearts, even though he talked more about the Ace of Clubs before. I'm not sure it's actually this deep in reality, but I like to think that it's him not letting his championships(and the lack thereof) define him, but rather letting who he is as a person shine and be the centerpoint instead! But on a sadder note, as @suzuki-ecstar said to me, maybe the Aces aren't there anymore because he's lost all hope for a chance at a third Ace entirely :(

#yes its finals week and im up to my eyes in coursework but instead decided to spend like 5 hours researching and writing this post #nah bcs i actually genuinely put more work into this then I think I have all semester dsfjdskjg #that thing about him using a condom and teddy bear in a magic trick genuinely had me crying with laugher. actual tears rolling down my face #<- HOW!?!? WHAT WAS THE TRICK?? its literally inconceivable to me what he did. oh if only there were pics UGH #anyways!! this post was a lot of fun to make!! i really really love the symbolism and design of helmets so this was a rly fun project #and i also went down a lot of rabbitholes while make this and saw many very weird articles from yore #i feel like i make an equal amnt of deranged posts abt seb and nando but i dont know why nando is gifted w all my well researched projects #<- i.e. chair post. that was the same level of research as this one but at least this one i could find actual sources about....#idk theres smth about the extremely long history of nando's history that evokes research posts like this KLAJSLSKDJ #theres just so much that i dont think I ever really see people discussing! so i must create.#haha what was that joke tag i wanted to make abt my researched posts? I think:#normal posts that catie normally makes in a normal fashion #<- one day ill go back and actually tag posts w that. bcs the amtn of research compared to my actual schoolwork is so unwell #fernando alonso #fa14 #f1 #formula 1 #catie.rambling.txt #we do a little bit of f1

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