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matthewhillsocialdesign · 1 year

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Ted Talk – Johann Hari

There is scientific evidence for nine different causes of depression and anxiety two of them are in our biology (your genes can make you more sensitive to these problems). But most of the factors that have been proven to cause depression and anxiety are not in our biology, they are factors in the way we live!

Once you understand this it opens up a very different set of solutions there should be offered to people alongside chemical antidepressants.

Every human being has natural psychological needs you need to feel you belong, feel your life has meaning and purpose, you need to feel that people see you and value you, you've got a future that makes sense.

In this culture we have become less and less good at meeting these deep underlying psychological needs and it's not the only thing that's going on but I think it's the key reason why this crisis keeps rising and rising. The World Health Organisation – If you're depressed if you're anxious you are not weak you are not crazy you're not a machine with broken parts you are human being with unmet needs.

Human Evolution and Loneliness

We need to think less about chemical imbalances and more about imbalances in the way we live. We are the loneliest society in human history there was a recent study that asked Americans do you feel like you're no longer close to anyone 39% of people said that described them no longer close to anyone

Our ancestors on the savannas of Africa were really good at one thing they weren’t bigger than the animals they took down a lot of the time they weren’t faster than the animals but they were much better at banding together into groups and cooperating this was our super powers a species we band together just like bees evolved to live in a hive humans evolved to live in a tribe and we are the first humans ever to disband our tribes and it's making us feel awful but it doesn't have to be like this

Tribes and Social Prescribing

They treated a set of patinents with severe depression and anxiety. They were told to come to the centre twice a week to meet with other depressed individuals not to speak about their misery but to figure out something meaningful they could do together.

Lisa literally started vomiting with anxiety it was so overwhelming for her people rubbed her back the group started talking there were like what could we do these are inner city east London people like me they didn't know anything about gardening they were like why don't we learn gardening there was an area behind the doctor's offices that was just like scrubland they're like why don't we make this into a garden so they started to take books out the library they started to watch YouTube clips I started to get their fingers in the soil I started to learn the rhythms of the seasons there's a lot of evidence that exposure to the natural world is a really powerful antidepressant but they started to do something even more important they started to form a tribe they started to form a group they started to care about each other if one of them didn't show up the others would go looking for them so how you okay out then figure out what was troubling them that day the way Lisa put it to me as the garden began to bloom we began to bloom this approach is called social prescribing it's spreading all over Europe and there's a small but growing body of evidence suggesting it can produce real and meaningful falls in depression and anxiety and one day I remember standing in the garden that Lisa and her once depressed friends had built its a really beautiful gardening and having this thought.

A lot of the time when it comes to socialisation you hear people say “It’s ok just be yourself.” Don’t be yourself. Be Us. Be We. Be part of the group.

Junk values have taken over our minds and made us mentally sick. Professor Tim Cassar from Knox University in Illinois has been researching this for about 30 years now and his research suggests several really important things firstly the more you believe you can buy and display your way out of sadness and into a good life the more likely was become depressed and anxious and secondly as a society we have become much more driven by these beliefs all throughout my lifetime under the weight of advertising and Instagram and everything like them.

I thought about this I realised it's like we've all been fed since birth are kind of KFC for the soul right we've been trained to look for happiness in all the wrong places and just like junk food doesn't meet your nutritional needs and actually makes you feel terrible junk values don't meet your psychological needs and they take you away from a good life.

We when we feel down we try and remedy it with a show off grand projection of ourselves. We all know these things. But in this culture we don’t live by them.

We know these things deep down. That the tweets, likes and notoriety are not important but

“We are designed in a machine which makes us neglect what is important about life.”

Can we disrupt the machine? How could you dedicate more of your life to pursuing these fleeting moments of meaning and purpose? Less about buying things you don’t need posting it on social media and making people comment OMG I’m so jealous right.

It was like an alcoholics anonymous but for strengthening mental health and boycotting capitalism.

There was a significant shift in values when people met face to face to check in with each other.

Even this hurricane of depression generating messages training us to seek happiness in the wrong places and towards more meaningful and nourishing values that lift us out of depression but with all the solutions that I saw.

––––––––––––––

Reflection – I found this TED Talk incredibly insightful. It supports my idea of bringing people together regularly through face to face interaction to battle rising levels of depression in our urban environments.

Hari talks about how for the first time ever in human evolution we have disbanded from our tribes and are living socially isolated to pursue goals which are aligned to fuel the capitalist machine.

This quote really got me thinking about what we value in western society:

“We are designed in a machine which makes us neglect what is important about life.”

#weekthree

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catboymingi · 3 years

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let me kiss you

navi/masterlist

pairing: hongjoong x reader

genre: angst, fluff; requested!

word count: 1.9k

warnings: language, insecurities

if it’s not too much to ask, can i request for one when the reader’s ex is a member of ATEEZ right now?

a/n: here you go again dear anon i hope this one is to your liking!!

this was… uncomfortable, to say the least. you’d met hongjoong out of the idol context, and while you did care a lot about him and his work and while you did know the names of the other members, for some reason you’d managed to miss that one of them was your ex. and not just anyone, no, it was seonghwa, the one your love told you the most about, his best friend, and now you had to pretend nothing was wrong while he kept excitedly telling you about how he’d love for you to meet them, his friends, his family, how he’d love if you finally got to spend time with all of them now that his company had given their okay. you’d have to ruin things because the drama of having one of the boys be your ex had the chance to ruin their career when it had just started, and you couldn’t do that. you couldn’t do that to hongjoong, not after he’d worked so hard, and you couldn’t do it to the other boys, either. they deserved better than for your past relationships to mess up their future. especially when you didn’t even harbour any hard feelings towards seonghwa - it just hadn’t worked out, but that was how it often went with teen romances, they ended because neither was really ready for the commitment yet. now you were ready, but you also knew you couldn’t act like you didn’t know seonghwa, and you knew fans could be desperate to figure out anything at all relating to their bias’ past. having dated seonghwa and now dating hongjoong was definitely not something that would stay hidden, nor was it something that wouldn’t be able to ruin their careers. you’d be seen as a slut, and while you were okay with that image because you didn’t have much to lose in that regard, because you weren’t famous, you couldn’t do it to hongjoong. you couldn’t have your bad image taint him. so, instead of being happy, you decided right there that you couldn’t be with him, that you had to end it before you were made public, that you had to end it before it was too late.

“joong”, you started, then corrected yourself. “hongjoong…”, and latest now did he know that something was wrong. he hoped he was mistaken, though, pretended he hadn’t heard the tone in your voice that left him scared of your next words.

“hm?”

“i don’t want to meet the boys. i don’t want to meet any of you. i don’t want to meet you anymore, either.”

it was so hard to get these words out, but you knew you had to. you knew you couldn’t ruin your love’s future because of a stupid teen romance with his best friend. you couldn’t do that to him, you’d rather break his heart and leave it for someone else to mend than ruin his entire future.

“what do you mean? how are we gonna do things if we won’t meet?”, confused, desperate to hear that this was just a joke, but it wasn’t, it sadly wasn’t.

“we’re not going to do anything. we’re breaking up, hongjoong.”

“something happened. i know something happened and you’re not telling me what it is, but please don’t do this.”

it hurt so much to see him like this, begging you to not leave him, begging you to not do this to him when you’d worked so hard to get where you were. but it had only been two months since you met, you’d been dating for about one now, and you were certain it would be easier for him to get over losing you than over losing his future. you couldn’t imagine he really already cared so much about you.

“nothing happened. it’s just not right for me, this whole… idol life. it doesn’t fit.”

you hated to say this. you hated to use this against him. you knew he was scared he wouldn’t find anyone that was willing to accept the fact that he was an idol, and you’d promised him you’d make it work, but you couldn’t possibly tell him that you were breaking up to keep his dream alive. he wouldn’t let you do that.

“okay”, resigned, head hanging low because he couldn’t argue against that, deep down he’d known he wouldn’t be able to find real love as an idol, he wouldn’t be able to find someone that was willing to stay with him and accept this kind of life, so even though it hurt he knew he had to let you go. he had to let you go because he couldn’t hurt you, and you were letting him go because you didn’t want to hurt him. so instead of spending the night cuddled up and excited to meet his friends, he spent the night at the dorm crying and thinking and trying to make a decision, one you hadn’t anticipated.

when you found out two days later that ateez was taking a hiatus due to their leader having a health condition that left him unable to support the group right now and had him needing to focus on his recovery, you didn’t think much of it. heartbreak hurt, but he would be okay.

but this condition lasted for several weeks, and you were starting to worry, just like the fans that were scared ateez was going to disband because they couldn’t work without hongjoong. and because you were no stranger to the fan spaces you saw all these rumours, saw leaked snippets of conversations that might be fake but might be real, and you texted a number you could only hope was still in use: seonghwa.

[y/n]: this is y/n, remember me?

[seonghwa]: why are you texting me? we haven’t talked in years

[y/n]: that’s why. what has hongjoong told you about this hiatus, because i know why it is

[seonghwa]: how would you know?? i wouldn’t have thought you’d be one of those stalker fans

[y/n]: would you believe me if i tell you i dated hongjoong and broke up w him shortly before

silence for a few seconds, then he started typing again.

[seonghwa]: so you’re his girlfriend

[y/n]: was. i can’t do that to the group if someone finds out we dated and now i’d be with hongjoong and i just don’t think it’d go well

that finally explained things, explained why you’d broken up without a reason hongjoong knew, explained why it all came so suddenly for his friend.

[seonghwa]: talk to him. don’t make this decision for him, for all of us. come over and let’s talk

and though you didn’t want to you agreed, going to the address seonghwa told you on the phone - he didn’t want to text it just in case -, being let in by a very exhausted seonghwa as you followed him to their dorm’s common area.

“who’s that?”, another boy asked, and now you had everyone’s attention, looking like a whole mess because you’d been crying near nonstop, too, because hongjoong hadn’t been the only one affected; knowing you had to do this didn’t make doing it any easier.

“y/n.”

hongjoong seemed shocked to see you, probably was shocked to see you, and then the others seemed to understand.

“what are you doing here?”, your ex-boyfriend then asked, looking from you to how you were half hiding behind your other ex-boyfriend, curious and hurt.

“seonghwa asked me to come”, though this answer didn’t make anything clearer to the boy you still loved.

“how did he ask you to come? how does he have your number?”

“that’s the thing. can we talk, joong? in private.”

everyone’s eyes were on you as you left the room, curious and worried because they knew you’d really affected their leader.

“what’s up? why are you here?”

he sounded cold and hurt and you hated it, hated it more than anything that you were the reason for him sounding like that.

“i don’t care about your idol life. i lied to you and i’m sorry but please don’t ruin your future because of this.”

“then what is it? why’d you leave? why’d you break up? if it’s being an idol then i don’t want it, i don’t want to have to give up on everything just because of this. i’ve been thinking about disbanding because it’s just not worth it if it ruins everything else for me.”

“no, joong, don’t, please”, almost crying, much like the man in front of you, “i just wanted to protect you and your future and your members and i didn’t want to be the reason why everyone hates you.”

“explain, please explain”, because your words didn’t exactly make a lot of sense yet - the company had agreed that there was nothing about you to worry about, nothing they’d maybe need to hide or take care of.

“it’s seonghwa. i used to be with him, in school, and we didn’t end on bad terms but i’m so scared people will say i’m just collecting member after member or something and then i’ll ruin your career and-”

“let me kiss you”, he interrupted. he wanted nothing more in that moment than to kiss you, but he didn’t want to do it in case your feelings for him had left, so he asked instead, making sure it was okay.

“okay”, and he didn’t need more before his lips were on yours, soft lips but a desperate kiss, swallowing the sobs that were now starting to escape your throat but breaking away as soon as he noticed, pulling you into his arms instead.

“y/n…”, he started, holding you tightly, “y/n. my y/n”, continuing until you’d calmed down a little before he spoke up again.

“everyone’s had high school romances. or, most people. you didn’t even know he’d be an idol yet, or in my group. how would anyone use that against you? how would anyone blame you for that when you didn’t know anything about it, hm?”, trying to comfort you even though he wanted nothing more than to cry himself.

“i just don’t want to ruin what you’ve all worked so hard for”, you admitted, though you were clinging to him as if your life depended on it.

“you’re not ruining anything, i promise. if that ruins things then let’s ruin things. it’s not worth it if i can’t be happy.”

“no, joong, don’t, don’t risk things, not for me, don’t-”

but again he interrupted you.

“you saw what not being with you did, what the thought of never having someone who could stand being with me despite my job did. don’t think that i’d give up on the person that wants to be with me despite it all just because you’re a little scared people might not like that you dated my best friend before.”

you nodded against him, trying to accept his words, trying to accept what he told you, and when he felt you relax in his arms he was finally able to relax as well. maybe you’d be with him despite it all. the one person he wanted despite it all.

“we’re trying”, he told you, his forehead against yours and looking you deep in the eyes, “we’re trying.”

“we are”, you confirmed, and his heart did somersaults with happiness.

and because he was tired of crying and being sad, he decided to ask a stupid joke question that you’d never let him live down, teasing him about having a thing for your ex.

“so… is seonghwa a good kisser?”

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kurtty-drabbles · 3 years

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The mysterious Death of Charles Xavier Part 2

N/A: A bit more set up for this story.

@dannybagpipesarecalling @kurttyfamily @tieflingteeth

The chippering birds are singing loudly on the bare branch of the tree near Maximoff´s household. One girl wearing a purple cloak and spreading towards the woman at the entrance of the house- the woman is wearing scarlet and is holding a teacup hovering in the air- and hugs said the woman. “Miss Maximoff, guess what? I got accept into the school!’

Kitty is beaming as she’s holding the letter of acceptance. Wanda Maximoff hugs the girl, her hand is gloved with velvet red and once the hug is broken, the Scarlet Witch titled her head. “School?”

Kitty beams and explains in one go, without needing to breathe, what really happened, and then takes a moment to breathe. Wanda blinks at the explanation.

“I see, let’s drink tea and talk,” Wanda set the table-one can see the magic items and even feel the charm itself. Kitty is familiar with going to this place, however, Kitty never saw the Darkhold...too advanced and too dangerous.

“So, from what you told me, you want to go to Hellfire School to solve the mystery of Charles Xavier´s death, ok, may I ask why?” Wanda asked curiously as the young pupil is tying up her hair in a ponytail at the last minute.

“Well, I...” she is cut off as a strong wind flips her hair, she looks around to see a new person in the room. “Oh, hello Mr. Maximoff,” Kitty greets him. Pietro rolls his eyes-it´s possible to see the corner of his mouth twisting in a smile- and speaks to the girl.

“I told you to stop calling me that, Mr. Maximoff makes me feel old...and I already have white hair,” he mentions his hair as proof of his words.

Kitty nods sagely. “Ok, Mr. P”

Wanda chuckles at that. Pietro sighs.

“Well, it’s better...and you what you two are talking about? magic stuff?” Pietro asked interested and resembling a curious puppy. Wanda shakes her head.

“Actually no, we´re talking about Kitty going to Hellfire School,” Wanda explained cautiously. “The school where Prof X was murder,” she raises her eyebrows and gesture to Kitty Pryde.

Pietro takes the hint. “So, let me get this straight, you wanna solve another mystery?” Pietro asked, and Kitty nods mutely. “Of course, here we go again, ok...did you know Prof X´ house was a school before the Hellfire took over?”

Kitty denies and now is giving undying attention to Pietro.

“Yeah, the Hellfire used to be a school for all mutants, well, he had a group of mutants called X-Men...Scott was the leader,” Pietro snickers and Wanda gives him a pointy look at him.

“After the death of Prof X, yes Kitty he was called like that, the X-Men disbanded, and re-grouped in other places,” Wanda pipes in calmly.

Pietro grimace now. “Our sperm donor was friends with Prof X,” he looks a bit revolted, “or maybe more than friends when the bald man died...our sperm donor cried like we never saw before, nor we´ll,” Pietro added somberly.

Wanda nods. “Yes, Magneto was so distraught by Prof X´ death...he even tried to take the school to honor his “friend” death," Wanda takes a sip of his cup of tea. “Then, by the intervention of law, Madelyne Pryor got the acquaintance of the school,”

Wanda can see the gears on Kitty´s mind working.

“But, what about Jean Grey? Should she be the one to be the heir? I mean, Prof X had a son ....who rejected him, the school in several ways, even legal ways,” Kitty remembers that story and has the clips saved on her pen drive.

Pietro interjected. “Well, yes. But Jean and Maddy are twins,” Pietro seems to want to make a joke and Wanda shakes her head. “Anyway, Maddy was made the heir for reasons we do not know...and then she and Emma created the Hellfire school, a place for mutants who are real genius!”

kitty blinks remembering this story. This time Wanda scoffs.

“Emma is a bitch,” Wanda replied and Kitty is shocked by the choice of words. “Sorry Kitty, but, she is....we have a bad history. Anyway, it was her idea to make this school so...exclusive,” Wanda is clearly not pleased.

Pietro nods in agreement. “She’s also one of the few telepaths who are powerful enough to hold the title Prof X left open,”

“And to make our sperm donor back off, say what you will about Emma, but she’s truly strong to make Magneto think twice before anything, few have this...privilege,” Wanda replied cooly.

Kitty nods. “And how the body was found? I mean, Prof X is/was a powerful telepath... I find it hard to believe he was murder in the traditional way,”

Pietro and Wanda sent a look to each other.

“Kitten, look, is already too late to say how dangerous and morbid this all is, again, not your first mysterious death nor will be your last...but, Prof X had many secrets, made many enemies...his death is not truly investigated,” the twins talked together.

Kitty holds her tongue to not say how funny that was.

“I know...but like you two said, together! I had to do this once again,” Kitty states conventionally.

Wanda sighs and then speaks. “You know, Reeds tried to solve it...”

Pietro shakes his head. “He’s that smart and I bet he knows what happened but refuses to share it,”

No one argues against that.

Kitty holds her letter. “Well, guess I have to be smarter than him,” she jokes. “and yes, I´ll solve the case,”

“Just be careful, Kitty, those students are scary smart, one of them, moon girl is so smart she...created a dino,” Pietro exclaimed perplexed.

Wanda chuckles. “You have a twin you is a witch. This surprised you?!”

“Wanda, have you made a T-Rex? No, I don´t think so,”

Kitty watches them bicker for some time.

_________________________________________________

Cameron is a rational man, at least, he truly hopes he is. When his daughter develops magic and mutation well, the man was freaking out, but, thanks to Terry, his dear wife, the man got a grip and did the right thing.

This, however, is a matter they both need to discuss quickly as possible. “Terry, listen, I have a friend in New Orleans, he has a house for rent, we can go there...Kitty can study in that School of magic in New Orleans, We can live there,” Cameron suggested.

Terry’s lips are now a thin line. “Look, we´re jumping horses here, your job...how that would work?”

Cameron raises his hand. “We have a filial in New Orleans, I can be transferred there,”

Terry is biting her lips now. “Yes, but the legal process would take a while, plus, we never enter contact with that school, Wanda told us, remember? That New Orleans magic school has time to accept new students...and I think we´re far behind,” Terry responds worriedly.

“True, but I was thinking...maybe Scarlet Witch could...you know, open some door for Kitty,” noticing his wife’s gaze, Cameron amends. “Look, I´m not happy with any of this, but, do you want our daughter to be the sole magic user here?”

Terry blinks.

“I´m a muggle, ok, but even I know Kitty must be lonely here. She’s the only witch in this area, is involved in dark mysterious and well, is the only witch too young to join a coven,” Cameron replied.

“Oh...but she has so many friends, does she needs witch friends?”

“I don´t know, again, I´m a muggle, but, wouldn´t hurt...Kitty can be more close with her magic side, it feels as if we´re trying to force her to choose one side,” Cameron states.

“All paths lead to Hellfire School then, and I hate it, I don´t want them to bully her...look, our daughter may not be magic, but, those kids...” she trails off.

Cameron nods slowly. “I´m afraid too, but let’s be real, what option do we have here, we once tried to lock her in her room to stop her from tangle her in dark mystery, and...we found out her former principal is Satan,”

“Mephisto” Terry corrected.

“Yeah, so...let’s try a new approach, maybe this is just the typical ‘’rich dude is killed for money’’ and will be bored, hey, sometimes rich people kill each other for money, not for Satan,”

The door slams and the two adults jolt.

Kitty enters the house. Still holding the letter. “Mom, dad...”

Terry just hugs her daughter, “tell me, do you want to go to this school?”

Kitty nods.

“Promise to call us?”

Kitty nods.

“Then...fine...guess we have no choice, but, look is temporary, you heard me, temporary!”

#kitty pryde #kurtty #kurt waggner will show up #kurt waggoner #kurtty yet #the maximoff are good twins #not twincest here #wanda and Pietro aren´t fans of Magneto

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clueless-content-creator · 3 years

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Lee Jaehyun x Kim Younghoon: Mistakes, Mistakes, and More Mistakes

Genre: Pure angst, The Slightest Fluff

Word Count: 3.4k

⚠️Warnings⚠️: Mentions of a Car Accident, Cheating, Manipulation, Slight Harassment, Swearing, (A lot of it) Happy ending!

5/28/2016

"Dear Lee Jaehyun, I'm heartbroken that I have to tell you this but... I already know that you are cheating on me. It was no secret.. At the very least not well kept. Unfortunately, I also know that it's been going on for some time now. Why would you hide something like this from me? We promised to always be honest with each other but I guess that was another blatant lie. I'm going to try to make this short and sweet and not to pour my feelings out but I hope you live a good long life with your new girlfriend. As much as I want to hate you for what you've done to me, I will continue to root for you and be happy for you because I still care... and love you. I wish you the best of luck with the rest of your life, without me. Whenever you find this, whether it's years later, an hour later (after I've written this), or before you pass away. Just know I'll always be by your side.. Even if I'm not actually there. This is my last goodbye, I love you Hyunjae. Never forget me." - Jung Y/N

It has been five years since you've last seen Hyunjae. And a lot has changed, you and Younghoon have gotten together after you left Hyunjae. Plus The Boyz disbanded, but they all still hang out every once in a while when they all have a chance. You heard that Hyunjae is still with his girlfriend, and they are planning on getting married soon. He also has 2 kids with her already. (Which you heard he regrets too) But one night, he had enough of her whining about wanting more kids so he took a walk around the park hoping to get some fresh air. Instead, he got heartache at the sight of you on the swing with Kevin, Jacob, and Eric surrounding you. 'She looks sad.' Hyunjae thought. "Please guys, just- just go away! I'm sorry but I'm not in the mood to talk about my situation with Younghoon." Right as Jacob went to reply, the rest of the group came running out trying to stop Younghoon from going near you. "Sorry Y/n," Sangyeon panted. "We tried to stop him but he ran really fast to get to you." You shook your head, "It's okay. Just please give me some time alone." Younghoon disagreed, "Listen, it's not over for me." A warm sensation that rolled down your face distracted you. You didn't know you were actually crying until Younghoon softly wiped the tears away, bringing you into his embrace. "I'm so sorry baby, I really do love you." He whispered under his breath. He's right, he does love you but he's not in love with you, and that's the problem. "Please just get away from me!" You shouted at him as you yanked your wrist back, freeing yourself from his grip. "Seriously Younghoon, don't say something you know you don't mean." You sighed heavily. The rest of the group was quiet, not saying anything nor moving an inch. You pointed your index finger at them, "I knew you all were cowards but I didn't know you were all idiots. Did you really think you could hide him cheating on me with who I thought was my best friend?.. Did you!?" You screamed the last part, your hands gripping your hair in frustration. "I can't believe you all... I can't believe all of you actually covered up his lie." Sangyeon sighed deeply, "Y/n.. I promise it was a mistake we dared him to ask her out, it wasn't-" You felt the anger rise to an unbearable point. "A MISTAKE? A FUCKING MISTAKE!? A DARE ISN'T A MISTAKE YOU-! IT'S ALL YOUR GUY'S FAULT!" You yelled before, stopping to take a deep breath. Then collapsing on the ground, tears brimming your eyes. "I'm so fucking done. I've said enough." You sniffed before getting up, ignoring your scratched-up hands and knees. "Will you at least spend the night at our place? I-It's really late! If you won't let us do that at least let us or one of us take you home." Jacob pleaded, looking extremely guilty. "No. I don't want anything from you guys anymore, you've done enough damage as it is." He sighed heavily, his hands running through his hair. Trying to rack his brain to think of excuses to get you to stay. Hyunjae felt like he was watching a drama, he felt as though he could do nothing to help. So he decided to leave you and the boys alone, being the same coward you left years ago.

You roamed the streets searching for a place to sit. Finally, you reached a closed restaurant with seats outside. You let out a deep sigh, feeling tears in your eyes as you remembered the night's events.

Flashback

It was just a normal movie night that you were having with the boys. You were enjoying it but something felt...wrong. It wasn't until Younghoon's phone rang several times and refused to tell you who it was that you started feeling unsettled. When you saw the boys exchange eye contact multiple times in a row, that also made you suspect them. You tried to relax and tell yourself that you were making things up in your head but as soon as he went to the bathroom, you grabbed his phone straight away. The boys weren't paying attention otherwise they probably would've taken it from you. But right as you picked it up you saw a text from 'Minju.' My best friend? He surely isn't cheating on me with her, right? But when you actually read the text, that thought changed almost instantly.

Minju💕💌: Hey sexy, why aren't picking up my calls? Poor thing, your shit girlfriend is probably making the worst love to you right now, so I'll leave you be and call later 💞

You remember feeling sick to your stomach when reading that message. Thousands of awful thoughts went through your head. You knew that Younghoon was aware of your insecurity about him hanging around pretty girls all the time (or so you thought) but even with that, you still trusted Minju because she was your best friend and had a fiancée of her own. Wonder what happened to that... But you remember wanting to yell at Younghoon when he got out of the bathroom, instead you calmly handed him his phone and then texted him on your phone. Saying this..

My One And Only🥰: "I trusted you. And you, plus Minju both broke my trust. Please don't contact me ever again."

He suddenly looked up at you in shock, trying to grab your wrist but couldn't. You quickly got up from your seat, grabbing your keys, phone, and bag. Rushing to get out the door, stuffing the others thing inside your bag. "Hey, Y/n!" Was the last thing you heard before running out of the apartment.

Suddenly a cold presence beside you brought you out of your thoughts. "Hey there, pretty lady. Wanna come back to my home with me?" Your face scrunched up in dismay. "No thank you." He smiled before caressing your cheek, making you cringe even more. "Aw sweetie, don't be shy. Come on!" The stranger grabbed your wrist, then pulled you closer inches away from your face. You tried to push him away but he wouldn't budge. "Ugh, I said no-" He then fell to the ground. An unknown figure punching him until he was unconscious. "She said no... asshole." Your eyebrows furrowed when you heard the familiar voice. You gasped when you looked up, "Sunwoo?" He nodded, patting your head gently, then quietly asking if you were okay. "I-I'm fine, thank you.. What made you come back to look for me? I thought you guys didn't care whether I was okay or not." You spoke quietly, slouching back in the chair. "The rest might not, but I certainly do.. A-anyways Y/n, look, even though we all messed up in one way or another, you shouldn't hold a grudge for too long because before you know it something bad might happen and you won't be able to say a proper goodbye." You nodded quietly, taking in what he just told you. But, Minju and Younghoon don't deserve to have their apologies accepted. Before you could thank him for his wise advice, he got a sudden phone call. "Hello?" Sunwoo's face dropped, "They're where!? I-In the hospital?.. A-alright, I'll be there as soon as possible, thank you." He bit his lip before rapidly explaining the situation. "Come on, we need to go now!"

The sounds of shoes squeaking against the tile flooring made you wince a bit but you ignored it. Sunwoo quickly went up to the front desk in a hurry. "Excuse me, I was the guy you were talking to early on the phone, do you mind telling us where rooms 126 and 127 are, please?" The front desk staff nodded and got up from her seat as we followed her steps to the rooms. 'Rooms'? I thought to myself. 'There's more than one person hurt'? I chewed on my bottom lip nervously, suddenly remembering my own cuts and scrapes from earlier. "Here's the first room, the second room is right next door." Sunwoo bowed to the woman and thanked her before hurriedly opening it, revealing Sangyeon in the hospital bed with cuts and bruises, as well as more than a few casts on his body making you physically and mentally hurt. "Y-Y/n!" He panted out, as I ran to him. "Don't force it, just relax!" I spoke softly while stroking his head. "I-I'm so sorry." You tilted your head, "F-for what?" You were shaking until he grasped your hands gently. "Younghoon's situation... I promise we didn't mean to do it on purpose- well, we did but we didn't think he'd actually make the move on her, but-" You sat there absentmindedly listening, blinking slowly. "You know, you're just making it worse for yourself.." He sighed heavily, "I'm aware, I'd just like to apologize for all of it," He placed his right hand on your cheek, making some tears fall down your face. "Oh gosh no, please don't cry! You are too pretty to cry." You both laughed at his comment. "I forgive you Sangyeon... Just don't even do this again! By the way, what actually did happen for you to get into this shape-" The door suddenly burst open making you jump which made Sangyeon laugh, "Y/n! Someone wants to see you." You didn't even notice Sunwoo left the room so you were puzzled to see him at the door. "Who?" You faintly asked. Sunwoo shrugged, "You'll have to see for yourself." He smirked slightly, walking out of the room to somewhere else. You looked back at Sangyeon, asking him permission to go with your eyes, him nodding in response. "You are free to go and come back." He smiles wholeheartedly. You thanked him and quickly sprinted out the door, seeing Sunwoo go into another room, but it wasn't room 127. You furrowed your eyebrows for a quick moment before shrugging it off, speed-walking into the next room. Before you went into the room you peeked in the little hole at the top of the door. You saw a few of the boys in the room surrounding the unknown person. You sighed dejectedly before opening the door as quietly as possible, except the creaking of the door gave it away as everyone turned to you. "Heh- Hi guys..." You cleared your throat as you awkwardly waved at them. Jacob jumped up and ran to you, "Oh thank Irene your okay!" He beamed at you making you smile back at him in return. "So, who brought you here then?" Kevin questioned. You turned toward the door expecting to see Sunwoo but he wasn't there. "Um.. Sunwoo did. He said it was an emergency so we rushed here." You looked down at the ground, feeling slightly unsettled. As you were looking down you saw a note on the ground that had "Dear Y/n," written on it. You heard some shuffling in the room so you quickly stepped on the note, preventing anyone else from seeing and taking it since it had your name on it. "Y/n-ah, are you okay?" Juyeon asked gently, placing his hand on your shoulder. You nodded, looking back up at him. Before you could register everything, you saw Younghoon lying in the hospital bed. You gasped and covered your mouth, moving closer towards the door, completely forgetting about the note. "You look like you've seen a ghost, are you sure you're alright?" Juyeon’s hand that was on your shoulder was now on your waist. "Yes, I'm great! I, uh- will be right back!" You reassured them before quickly running out of the room. You searched for the room that Sunwoo went in earlier. Finally reaching room 103, you slowly crept into the room seeing Hyunjae this time. But before any anger could fill you up, you paused seeing him also covered in cuts and bruises just the same as Sangyeon (if not, worse) as well as stuck in casts and wrapped up with bandages too. He was fast asleep so you didn't want to wake him up but you walked closer, still being intrigued by him as you always were. With the door suddenly opening plus the sound of a group of voices you knew sounded familiar, you quickly ran and hid in the closet. "Do you know where Y/n went? I can't seem to find her anywhere." Whoever he was talking to must've shaken their head judging by the fact they weren't talking. "I don't know either Sunwoo, just let her be. She doesn't deserve to see any of them anyway but Jacob said that she visited them and then ran off." I gasped slightly, which almost gave away my position, except right when I gasped the door flung open. "GUYS COME ON LET'S EAT!" Eric came bursting through the door, his loud voice making me jump a little. But while they were busy talking and deciding what to eat, I was trying to figure out what to do. Visit Younghoon and set the record straight, ask Sangyeon what happened for them to all end up in the hospital, or confront Hyunjae about all of the circumstances. Since you were in Hyunjae's room at this very moment you decided on the latter. You slowly opened the closet as soon as you heard the door close. Seeing the boys right outside the room made the adrenaline rush in you. Once again you quickly made your way back to the chair that was by his bed. You sighed heavily, taking his hand in your own. "I'm sorry Hyunjae for this mess. You should've never dated me... I caused this accident, didn't I?" You looked up to see him still asleep before sighing heavily once again. You started to feel yourself getting sleepy, and the next thing you know you are passed out while laying your head on the bed. Little did you know, Hyunjae was fully awake just pretending to be asleep and as soon as you closed your eyes he started stroking your hair softly, eventually making him sleepy and then falling asleep too.

Once you woke up, you went to get up from your seat, but you felt the warmth of his hand around your wrist. "Don't go." His voice was faint, hoarse, and barely audible, but it was just enough for you to be able to hear it. You quickly turned around to see him struggling to sit up. You quickly helped him, not wanting him to struggle "H-Hyunjae..." You choked out, not being able to say much. "I'm okay Y/n. I know this came as a shock but it's alright." He softly stroked your cheek as the tears that were previously being built up finally fell down. Before either of you could say another word the door opened, revealing Chanhee, Sunwoo, Kevin, and Changmin. You quickly stood up, trying to excuse yourself from the room except none of the boys would let you. You looked down in shame, "Listen, I know-" Changmin shoved you as he was walking toward Hyunjae's hospital bed. "Oh sorry, didn't see you there." You could sense the sarcasm of his voice from a mile away. "Changmin! Apologize, right now! I didn't become the leader only for you to treat other people like human trash." Sangyeon was now in a wheelchair with Jacob wheeling him. Jacob was shaking his head in disapproval. "He's right Changmin, apologize to Y/n she did nothing wrong." Changmin was furious, "Nothing wrong?!? She was the one that put you in that god-damn wheelchair Hyung!" Sangyeon sighed, "That was my fault for not looking before crossing a busy road, Changmin. It's far from her fault, now let's just go eat-'' You quickly stood up in shock, "You got hit by a car!?" Kevin stopped you, "Well, not exactly. He was hit by a truck, a cargo truck to be exact." Your jaw dropped to the ground. Then turning to face Sangyeon. "Did you really?" Changmin inhaled sharply, "Are you fucking serious! Y/n, you left years ago with Younghoon without telling us a single word. Then you suddenly showed up saying you had a week in Korea to come to visit us rather than finding out that he was cheating on you only to be left by yourself... Sunwoo should have left you on the street." Sangyeon got up from his wheelchair, making Jacob panic. "CHANGMIN! THIS BEHAVIOR IS COMPLETELY UNACCEPTABLE. LEAVE THE ROOM NOW!" You had covered your mouth in shock from everything that had just happened. Jacob brought Sangyeon back into his wheelchair, then took him and Changmin out of the room. Kevin and Chanhee called for the doctor to check on Hyunjae, and finally Sunwoo. He helped you stand up again after you fell down to your knees. "Are you okay?" He asked softly. You shook your head, "I don't know.. I think I should just go. Changmin just proved my point anyways, Hyunjae is better off without me and so is Younghoon plus Sangyeon won't have to worry about this kind of thing happening again at least!" Your broken voice gave away the fact that you were pretending to be okay. “Y/n, you don’t have to pretend in front of me, and you’re all wrong..” You tilted your head at him in confusion, “What do you mean?” He smiled softly at you, “We all care for you and Changmin is just speaking out of frustration. You know that he is never like this but either way just know, that we will support any decision you make.” You nodded, “I know what I’m gonna do.”

Epilogue: You so clearly remember hearing the wedding bells as the small children scream with joy and the clapping of everyone else at the ceremony made your heart swell with happiness. As well as vividly remembering when Hyunjae proposed to you with your mom’s ring, it was a very emotional time not knowing how his kids would feel but he said ‘they’ll love you, I’m sure.’ You knew you made the right decision, even though Hyunjae cheated and had kids with another woman we both knew she was far from the one. Minju was the one that played both Younghoon and Hyunjae at the same time. When she was getting arrested for multiple charges, she confessed that she purposely broke us up just to get me to hate him and get his money. The funny thing is, she was getting Younghoon to be her fucktoy while Hyunjae was her source of income. It all made sense, the note that you found back at the hospital was Younghoon explaining everything he knew. It said that Hyunjae still loved you and was unhappy in his relationship, Minju was playing them both but Hyunjae was so stubborn he couldn’t believe it and also that you deserved to be happy with who you choose to end up with. So even though you managed to choose Hyunjae over Younghoon he was equally as supportive as the rest of the boys saying that we belonged together. His kids were so happy to have me as their new mother, it made me so ecstatic that they were just as happy as Hyunjae to have me back, saying that Minju was just ‘plain evil’ which always made you laugh. You knew that everything fit in place now, after all these years. You were the missing puzzle piece.

#the boyz hyunjae #the boyz angst #the boyz fluff #the boyz younghoon #the boyz stories #tbz scenarios #the boyz scenarios #tbz angst #tbz fluff #tbz hyunjae #tbz younghoon

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bts-ficrecs · 4 years

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Namjoon angst fic recs (no smut)

@ephyra16 asked:

Hey...! Your blog is of so much help to me, thank you for all the hard work you do... I wanted to ask if you know any long Namjoon oneshots or series which mostly have angst but no smut...? Namjoon centered fics are really hard to find. Thanks!!

yes hello for some reason tumblr hates me and idk why everything gets wonky when i try to answer asks so i’m making a new post <3

1) as a jin stan i feel u. is hard to find fics for our mans but that just means when we find one we devour it and cherish it 4 ever lol

2) jsdflajsd you might have more luck asking someone else for straight up angst cause i can barely stomach angst LOL. I tried my best to find some heart breaky fics for you! :”) A majority of these I have not yet read so we will both be riding the emo train together.

As you requested, most of the oneshots are long fics, over 5k but! There are several honorable mentions under 5k are also listed cause they’re great

Thank you for your patience and I’m glad you’re enjoying the fics I reblog! :D so many great stories out there. as always, if there’s a fic that any of you readers think should be on this list lmk!! 🧡🧡 Enjoy!~

A Little Bit Of Sugar by @lthyl

Summary: Namjoon is well aware that some, well actually most people could find his hobby not exactly common, yet he still considers himself to be a man of tasteful words and higher intellect - someone who managed to understand the true, deepest meaning of beauty itself. And so he doesn’t really care if his methods of collecting pretty things end up being darker that expected, once you peek under the surface.

Almost Love by @joonary

Summary: You think you’ve got your life all figured out—after all, you found your soulmate already, and you’re lucky enough to have found him in your childhood best friend. You suppose that maybe, now that you’re older, your luck has begun to run out.

Better To Have Loved by @rkivenamu

Summary: Love, Namjoon had found, wormed its way though people, consumed them whole until it left nothing of the people they had once been. It became a weapon to be used to wound the other. Love, it seemed, was the worst thing that had ever happened to him.

Bloom by @hobidreams

Summary: Family is who you kill for. Who you die for. In this society, you and your kin are shadows, clinging to the darkness to obey orders absolute. But when such orders command you to abandon what little honor remains for wealth and notoriety, you find yourself lost in lonely uncertainty about the only vocation you’ve ever known. That is, until you meet a man with gentle hands, a poet’s heart, and a love for coaxing the world into bloom.

Note: okay, this has smut (there are 2 smut scenes) but… it is too good for me to not add to this list

Breathless by @personawife

Summary: Jungkook was eleven when it had begun. At first, he didn’t realize what was happening to him when he had miraculously coughed up a flower petal. He thought that maybe it had accidentally blown into his mouth with the wind, but then he realized that there were no cherry blossom trees around his house.

Pairing: Namjoon x Jungkook

Catching Fire by @namjoonchronicles

Summary: “If you didn’t want to go, then you should have told me. I wouldn’t have taken you here.”

Cut by @chimchimsauce (>5k)

Summary: Namjoon always hated soulmates.

Chasing Perfection by @shuaffeine-rkive

Summary: Kim Namjoon is the only kid in AP Bio that is smarter than me, and I will make it a point to destroy his perfect record.

Emancipated by @imagniation

Summary: CEO!Namjoon is a hero time and time again when your father takes the villain role.

Five Times by @lordofassgard

Summary: Five times you wished you never met Namjoon.

Sequel (of sorts): Part 2 - Namjoon's POV

For All the Petals by @rosaetae (>5k)

Summary: A story in which you met him in the spring, fell in love with him in the summer, but he left you in autumn and how you missed him in the winter.

Forget Me Not by @fairyjeons

Summary: She fell apart that day. An all white day with crowds of adoring friends and family to see them make the most happiest decisions of their lives, to choose to be together. She chose yes. He chose different.

Ghost In The Machine by @jimlingss

Summary: Kim Namjoon is your android that’s modified to become the best serial killer in all of existence. But when he starts to learn about humanity, he begins to threaten your goals.

God of Destruction by @jimlingss

Summary: Everything he touches breaks; except for you.

Jealous by @btssmutgalore (>5k)

Summary: Namjoon remembered the day you left clearly.

Lit Me Up by @floralseokjin

Summary: You find yourself becoming captivated by a mysterious, handsome author, but you may have bitten off more than you can chew…

No Goodbye by @floralseokjin (>5k)

Summary: Even if you’re the one who ended things, you can still feel pain. Your heartbreak is valid. Your sadness for the past is a grieving process…

Noble Gain and Loss by @jaeminlore (>5k)

Summary: You are a person of nobility preparing with your tutor for your royal debut. The two of you fall into a forbidden love.

Not The One by @personawife (>5k)

Summary: Maybe you should’ve realized early on then, that something was bound to go wrong. Meeting your soulmate at sixteen and living happily ever after? No one’s that lucky. But you refused to believe anything else.

Paracosm by @jimlingss (>5k)

Summary: Namjoon’s always known he was your second choice. He was a substitute for someone who wasn’t there. So when you’re on your deathbed, he intends to reconstruct your memories and remove your regrets.

Press Play by @out-of-jams

Summary: You didn’t mean to. Didn’t intend to fall in love with a dying man.

Submerged by @myfeelsinink

Summary: Kim Namjoon is the man of your dreams; or rather, from your dreams.

Suspended Soul by @justimajin

Summary: A silver ring, a live long promise, and an eternity of happiness. All of which, he had managed to break.

The what Ifs by @ellieljade (>5k)

Summary: You would be able to handle the relationship between Namjoon and your best friend if it weren’t for all those damned “what ifs”

Wishf-oo-l by @sseudanym (>5k)

Summary: To fulfill a good man’s bad dream.

Worshipers of the Soul by @jimlingss

Summary: The King of the Underworld was denounced and exiled from Heaven as a god. But with your help, he may rise to power once more and claim his rightful throne.

You’ve Got That by @mikrksmos

Summary: After making a life-changing decision for your career, you’re unsure of how exactly to bring it up to your boyfriend after your relationship and communication has not really been in sync. Namjoon is ready to take this relationship to the next stage, and he is sure that what he needs to ask you will be the solution to all the problems you have been having. Both know this next move is the right idea, but are unaware of how parallel those ideas really are.

Confirm Or Deny by @dinoyoongi

Status: complete series (6/6)

Summary: You’re a member of the rising group FRNZEE. You’ve been dating Namjoon for years when Dispatch releases an article exposing your relationship. Your company confirms the relationship. Big Hit denies it.

Deeper than Ink by @whoajeon

Status: discontinued series (2/?)

Summary: Should you fall in love with someone, even in the slightest, your skin becomes marked with vibrant colors that depict the story of your emotions. A tattoo, per say. However, should they or you fall out of love, the bright hues dull to black and the feelings you once had for each other melt away. To many, it’s a blessing to not have to live with the pain of your past. But what’s the point when you have too many reminders–say 27?

His Deaf Stars by @jooneos

Status: discontinued series (1/?)

Summary: When Namjoon turned 20 he had been excited to finally find his soulmate. He hadn’t anticipated that finding them would prove to be such a long journey. Now, more than 500 years later Namjoon still hadn’t found them.

Note: ok, yes it’s discontinued and only 1 part is up but still… please read it. It’s an interesting read regardless!

Inked by @kookswife

Status: complete series (6/6)

Summary: The day Namjoon entered your life was the day you were a bit more than utterly fucked.

Monster by @wordycerty

Status: ongoing series (1/?)

Summary: Namjoon as a vampire and you’re locked in a basement with him. For you to escape, he first needs to feed.

Noble Heart by @agustkive

Status: ongoing series (1/?)

Summary: Unrequited love can destroy anyone, and in a society where it could literally do so, it made it difficult to want anything more. Being among the population with Hanahaki disease, you battled with doing what you loved without actually feeling it. That is, until a new florist by the name of Kim Namjoon came into your life to remind you of what it actually felt like.

Reality by @thoughtssilent

Status: ongoing series (11/12)

Summary: Namjoon can’t deal with himself anymore, and to make things worse, BTS is disbanding.

Pairing: Namjoon x OT7

Regrets by @nightbts

Status: complete series (3/3)

Summary: When his eyes met yours, you felt your heart squeeze in your chest at the familiar brown eyes that you once used to know at the back of your hand. The very ones you’d wake up to every morning. The very ones that would gaze at you with so much affection as the words I love you spilled past his mouth during the most random moments of your day. It was him, your ex-boyfriend, the very Kim Namjoon.

Solanacea by @softjeon

Status: complete series (10/10)

Summary: There was something between them that neither could deny. It was like this from the first day they had met.

Pairing: Namjoon x Jimin

The Heiress’ Son by @jimlingss

Status: complete series (3/3)

Summary: Love is never enough. It could never feed you, protect you, stop death from taking you. It chains you down. It compels forgiveness unconditionally. It is dangerous. While it is the most intense of feelings, love is not enough and it will never be. Love never helped anyone.

What If I Said by @thoughtssilent

Status: complete series (3/3)

Summary: If no one is there for him, Namjoon won't be there for them. Or, a collection of sad stories.

Pairing: Namjoon x OT7

#namjoon angst #namjoon fanfic #bts fic recs #rm angst #bts angst #ephyra16 #g recs #g replies #f:knj

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nightswithkookmin · 4 years

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JIKOOK:DON'T ASK ME TO STOP LOVING YOU. I WON'T- Jikook Shading eachother pt3

Disclaimer:

Everything expressed in her is my opinion. It is not intended to be malicious or disrespectful to any of the parties here in mentioned. Please don't be weird.

Jeon Jungkook is in love with Park Jimin. Period. If you have doubts, take my word for it. That man heard a bell ring and he's been following that jingle sound till thy kingdom come. Bless him.

No, I am not off track. We are still on the Jikook breakup/fights 2020 train and it's express. Beep beeeeep! Sorry.

Jk loves Jimin and it is the cause of all his woes- with Jimin as well as with the other bandmates. His problem is he loves that man- too much.

Yes, the 2019 November-December tensions with his bandmates was all because he keeps blurring the lines between his relationship and his career. He is lucky, both of them are lucky that they found eachother in a space like this where they have the opportunity to love and still have it all. Trust me, it's rare.

Except JK didn't join BTS to pursue a career. Bless him. He went there to harvest him some sweet love. Lol. Jokes aside, Jk when he started out had no goals, no ambitions whatsoever. He was young. He was just following the path set out for him by his parents perhaps, his teachers- and also he thought Namjoon's thighs were hella delicious. Lol

He has had to grow to love and appreciate his craft and career just as he's said in the recent Japan comeback interviews. He even almost quit singing to go be a dancer and all it took was Jimin telling him he had an amazing voice for him to stay- the power of park Jimin!

That's how young and naive he was when he began his career path. Let's get a bit deep and psychoanalyze him real quick. He made an entire life decision to join a boyband for seven years not because he loved to sing and dance but because he admired the zeal od RM?

Then when layer he was exposed to dance, and had to make an equally important life decision, he allowed another bandmate(Jimin) to make that decision for him. This should tell you the state of his mind as at the time. He was young and impressionable with no aspirations of his own.

Even as of 2019, he said he had no idea what he was going to do with his life after BTS had the band disbanded in 2018. That's a lot of experience span to not know what he wants to do with his life.

Now I don't mean to say he is immature but we all know the members especially Jimin have pointed out time and again that JK is in fact immature or can be.....

He seems to me as the type who still have a lot to figure out and per his recent interviews where he's talked about taking time to himself to work on himself and his hobbies etc. I have a feeling 2020 has been a period of awakening for him. A period where he is self actualizing a lot and I'm happy for him.

But it is what is causing this age of enlightenment in his life that has me curious.

Moving on, this young, naive, impressionable JK as he was in the early days of BTS started developed feelings for his hyung. Do you see the problem? I'll wait....

These feelings, I assume, began as pure admiration and fondness of Jimin. Jimin was this talented and hardworking, spontaneous, energetic hyung and JK with an impressionable mind as his was was bedazzled by him.

Soon these feelings would morph into what could be seen as an obsession, infatuation and then finally love.

The way I see it, loving Jimin gave him purpose for the first time in his young life. He may not have known much about his life goals and ambitions but he knew being with Jimin gave him a solid ground to stand on, a new sense of direction, certainty and purpose.

He got to share in Jimin's passions, share his with him, dance together, sing, practice, rehearse, make him the subject of his photography, the subject of his attention, care for him, be cared for by him- something he hadn't had the chance to experience from home before he was yanked away into idol life.

Growing up, we all experience that moment where we imprint on friends and relatives. My uncle was my mentor as well as my elder brother too. I admired them so much I sometimes confused that with romantic love till I got socialized properly.

Jk's socialization was.... He....

-Jk may be an introvert but he thrives and shines best when he partners up or is in a group like BTS or his friends group etc and Jimin i feel was the ideal partner for him; his queerness, his adventurousness, pushing JK's boundaries, challenging his beliefs, showing him how to have a good time- ok I really want this Jimin back! Like right now!

Jimin left an impression on JK's young mind. He imprinted on him. And for the longest time, we've seen the way he stares at Jimin.JK really loves Jimin.

So what's the problem?? Loving JM is consuming his mind y'all. It's all he thinks off. All he cares of. He seems super hyper focused on Jimin so much so that it is affecting the dynamics of their group.

His jealousy,possessiveness- He knows he has to keep his relationship a secret for the sake of the group because it is their secret too and yet he just can't help himself.

I feel RM and the others complain a lot about how he let's his jealousy get the best of him. Like how he almost exposed JM as his boyfriend on several occasions verbally( see previous post for further details)

Like how him getting jealous and possessive gives them away more often. I mean JM is bad at hiding it too but let's be honest JK isn't winning any awards with that bad acting. *sigh. He is hopeless.

But yes this is what led to the MMA standoff with RM. It is also the reason for the tensions between Jikook during Jin's birthday VLive (JM asked him to keep his distance because the members had tried to separate them earlier and so JM was just being salty af during this period. It had nothing to do with JK but the others. See Golden Disc and you'll understand)

This also led to their subsequent break up( which you will notice during the comeback interviews and promotions periods- I don't know about you but they were giving off two exes tryna to keep it happy for the cameras during that period but failed cos their interaction were just....)

PS: there are a lot of moments I want to point out but don't know where to begin cos there are a lot.

The blackswan behind scenes moments( JM asking JK if he he wanted to be in a subunit with someone else, JM making JK jealous during the interviews, JK using Tae to make JM jealous the next day, JK holding JMs hands not wanting to let go- he was missing his ex. Lol it's what you do when you have to be friends with that ex you still love and won't hesitate to touch them given the slightest opportunity and once you do you don'twanna let go)

Just look at that whole On comeback promotion moments. You'll understand what I mean.

Also the Run episode moments- you know the one JK almost beat Suga up with the frying pan- JM for this phase seemed to be to be trying to get back together with JK. Dude was clingy as fuck! And for once he was on his best behaviour, trying his hardest not to make JK jealous. I mean the Run behind scenes moment where JM was helping Tae clean off food residue on his mouth but stopped immediately when JK lifted his head. *insert skull head emoji. Lol

To say JM was a bit clingy during this getting back together phase would be an understatement. Remember his clingy moments during Suga's birthday Vlive 2020? And during Festa too? He was trying to get JK's attention and also impress him throughout.

Around this breakup moment too was when he was spending a lot of time with Tae playing video games with Army, posting their selfies at 4 AM and what not. It is also the same period he posted a picture of himself with his dogs on Twitter and said he was trying to spend time with loved ones- if that wasn't shade to JK!

They couldn't post 13th May because of these issues they were having. Not that JM didn't try though. He posted on the 1st, JK should have followed with 3rd but did was busy pouting somewhere. JM still gave us a 5/8=13 selca though so yaay!

What I'm trying to say is, their fight has been about JK not wanting to be separated from JM and JM asking JK to cool it off for a while to not cause trouble with the members and the company.

To which Jk responds with:

1. Interrupting JM's call with Jin during his VLive to ask him on a date and say I love you to him. Dude is a rebel, I don't know what you want me to say. He is not gonna cool it just because it makes the other worried he is exposing them too much.

Jk interrupting JMs live I feel got Jikook in trouble because after that Vlive JM never did a solo live on VLive again to this day. His subsequent lives have all been on YouTube.

I have a feeling he was penalized because that VLive exposed them. And no, I'm not being delusional. Jikook were both banned from doing a VLive together alone following their New Jersey VLIVE in 2019 when they- I don't even know how to describe what they did in that live!

And to make it less obvious, I think BigHit decided the others should stop doing solo Vlives on VLive altogether because now they all do their solo lives on YouTube as well and if they have to do a Vlive it is heavily monitored by BigHit staff or its radio and not done in their rooms too.

So I think Jimin got pissed at JK for doing that and getting them in trouble again. I mean if you heard him sigh during the new Jersey VLive you would know how frustrated JK makes him. He loves him too but.... Jk can be a bit too much ya know?!

Anyhoo, so I believe JM called for some space and told JK to take up interests in other things beside him and I don't know how JK took it but he responded with this:

Posting the cover of the song Not Never. Which was him basically saying for as long as he lives he will not never think about JM. As in he is never not ever keeping away from JM. We might have to pry Jimin from his cold hands! *sigh

Which leads to the radio Vlives moments,

Something Jimin said during his interview with suga caught my attention. He said it was nice that they get to speak with Armies at least like this. I believe all these were putting a lot of stress on Jimin as he has decided to take a break off social media prior to him saying so on this interview. But the wording of that statement also made be believe some thing or someone was preventing him from talking to Armies in the usual manner.

Earlier with RM he had said how he would go crazy if they weren't allowed to do certain things he was used to doing on stage as well. So that also raised a flag to me.

I had a feeling Suga had invited JM on that Radio live to address his 'issues'- including his issues with JK. Jikook have a subtle way of communicating with each other and somehow social media has a huge part in that. They not the only ones, Beyonce and JayZ also addressed their relationship issues through their music, going back and forth yet they lived together. I DONT UNDERSTAND THESE CELEBRITIES!!!

Sorry for the rant. Anyway I had a feeling JK was listening to the radio interview too.

Suga asked JM why he didn't come to his music video set to support him- which I believe he was referring to his Daechwita shoot. JM didn't go because, take a guess...

JK was there too. Lol. He had gone with Jin and even ended up filming a part in the music video. My guess is Jk thought Jimin was gonna be there because he always go to Support Suga and the others in times like that.

So Jimin responds with 'were you expecting me? .... I didn't come because I want you to want me more.' Now that's an absolutely random response don't you think? He couldhave said something logical like he had to record at a studio or something- unless he wasn't talking about Suga but was sending that message to someone else who was listening in. A certain man with a JM tatto ring on his ring finger perhaps??

JM from this response revealed he intentionally missed that shoot. He knew JK would be there and he wanted him to ask where JM was at it he wasn't at the shoot. It's also interesting how during this period JK was spending a lot of time with Jin. When he interrupted JM's Vlive call he was with Jin. He went with Jin to Suga's MV and Jin posted a selca of him and shirtless Jk dieimh this period too while JM was mostly seen with Tae. What does this remind you of??

MANILA. same thing happened when they had that Manila fight. Jin was with JM and we all know who was siding with JK!

Why would JM say he wants to be enacted more? Easy- He a slytherin and a Libra and those two mixed together is sinister. Kidding.

I believe JK intentionally took a step back from JM, to give him the space he wanted and it had JM feeling someway about it. Probably had him feeling JK didn't want him as much anymore. Dude is insecure we been known. He a Libra and a slytherin what y'all expect?

So I'm guessing JM put up the classic textbook attitude towards JK which had JK all confused because he had no idea what their issues were anymore or why his boyfriend was spending his nights at Tae. You want space, you got it. Why you mad?

So JK reaches out to Suga for help. because the intention was fix his relationship not have it plummet. Dude is in love with this man and will do whatever it takes to keep his relationship. *Sigh

Suga comes through for him with the interview. And I think JK put two and two together- literally. He comes up with still with you a few days after JM's interview and does a radio interview with Suga as well.

Now the focus of this interview was his "apology to Armies for his scandal.' But funny, cos his scandal happened a month before the interview. Suga radio had been ongoing after the scandal and yet this man didn't think once to come on it and apologize to Armies about an incident that BigHit had already addressed until JMs interview.

You don't talk about scandals. That's the protocol.

Let me also point out JK has had several scandals in the past of which he had never addressed in a Vlive let alone apologize in that way. Not saying he wouldn't, he hasn't. They themselves don't address scandals unofficially, that's the protocol and he knows it.

If they were allowed to think Armies would be more interested in him addressing the Tatoo gurl scandal not his Friday night happy hours with his friends. That apology was for Jimin not armies.

Also, he pointed out how still with you was written when he was alone in the dark thinking by himself. That sounds to me like something you do when you've had a fight with your boyfriend/girlfriend and they've packed their things and left your shared apartment.

Interestingly, Jk mentioned during Festa the rain fight. Still with you literally has rain drops sounds in the beginning of the song and also on the cover on sound cloud. Seems to me that whatever happened that night had JK reminiscing about times he'd fought with JM- the rain fight. Which is what inspired still with you (I will do a full analysis of that song and others soon here on my blog'

Yea, so he apologized to JM for their fight I guess and said he loves Army. *smirk.

And things started falling into place right after that. They started- Jikooking again. Jk called JM out on Weverse so they start their online flirting thingy- posting immediately after each other, 13, those kinda things

Things seemed good. Untill their Japan interviews when JK said spending time alone pursuing new hobbies was gold to him and JM saying maintaining his relationships with friends and family is good to him. Seems JK is still salty about JM wanting space. It will take sometime for him to get used to not being around JM 24/7. Know what I mean?

I don't think there was major tension there. Just two lovebirds shading eachother. *smirk I mean the passive aggressiveness of it all. Lol

I have a feeling JK will keep jabbing at JM with that because let's face it, he is the emo one in that relationship and most importantly he loves JM with all his being and wants to be with him always. A partner asking for space can feel like they are pushing you away or rejecting you. It triggers a lot of insecurities so I understand JK in that sense. They are both not wrong in my opinion. Space can be a good thing and hey at least JK got to read a whole book during this time! Who woulda thought!

And quiet honestly, if Jikook are real as I believe they are then these issues they are having pales in comparison to the hurdles that lie ahead of them for when they decide to come out or live as a forever couple.

I guess It is why JK put these lyrics in GCF Helsinki at JMs part:

Why do you spend your time leading the chorus,

When the war was just waiting before us?

As if you didn't know

I guess it's sums up what Jikook were dealing with during that period of you take into consideration the fact this was released end of December/ early 2020.

Jimin pays too much attention to what people thinks of their relationship as if he didn't know what he was getting himself into. ...

This has been a long one, chai! Sorry. I get carried away sometimes talking about Jikook. Lol.

So what is the state of their relationship? They good. I been told y'all JK is trying to bring back their old online filtering habits. He did it on Weverse when he posted about him reading and asking what JM was doing forcing JM to come out with a response.

He did the same yesterday when he posted a cover song after JM posted his selca on Twitter. They good. They more than good I believe. I will keep observing and will update y'all with my observations as and when.

Oh and I will be doing an analysis of his new cover may be later tonight. Until then its Jikook forever bishes! Gang, gang, gang,

I'M OUT!

#kookmin #jikook #nightswithkookmin #jikooktheories #kookmintheories #jikook analysis #kookmin analysis #bts jimin #bts jungkook #jikook fights #jikook scenarios #jikook wallpaper #kookmim #kookmin fights #jimin lockscreens #park jimin #bts fluff #bts angst

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ritchieblackless · 4 years

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[Ranking Of Cozy music eras]

Well, as many of you know, Cozy did A LOT of things with many musicians and playing different styles. He appeared on at least 66 albums and counting another session work, some hidden works (Like Supertision and Ballroom Blitz) in total is nearly 90 things that he did! (that's why it took me so long, I had to listen to all again) but always one era will be better than other so... at the request of @thespiritofvexation (and I wanted to because is a excellent idea) here are the ranking of Cozy music eras.

Note: I'll try to be objective about this but also you'll get my opinion.

9. Whitesnake.

(As you can notice, Cozy's solo album is there. I put it because is in same era. I did this with all Cozy's solo albums 'cause the poor boy didn't have the time to make a proper solo career... he didn't like that very much anyway.)

Well first thing I'll highlight about this work... is the fact that his drumming is plain, so plain... for being Cozy Powell. You know, Blues rhythm, one bass drum and tomb with a little bit of cymbal... plain. But it's alright because the album needed that type of drumming (Not pun intended of course) I'm just saying that his drumming is so plain because the songs (Blues/Hard Rock) needed that, otherwise, it would have sounded a bit Rainbow-ish. Remember that Cozy was so versatile. He had a strong style but if the song needed the opposite of his style, he was going to do it.

Whitesnake era for me is not his best but LIVE. He on stage was another story. He was amazing.

Songs with Cozy's signature: Hungry For Love.

A side from Whitesnake we have his solo album which is one of his best works. Octopuss was a successful album. We have his mix between classical music and his drumming which is mind blowing. Hard Rock tracks like The Rattler, Formula One (Good one, Cozy) and Princetown and one ballad (Because he liked... a true sweetheart.) Dartmoore.

8. Michael Schenker Group.

His work here is what I like to call "Angry Drumming"

He didn't get along with Michael Schenker so they were fighting everytime. So all he did in this only album with MSG he did it angry... that's why is so good. He was "in mourning" trying to get over Rainbow so he had no better idea that making his drumming sound Rainbow-ish (I can relate) taking advantage of the situation that MSG was a heavy rock band. Not Rainbow, but still. There are a lot of Cozy's fills and Cozy's arrangements on the songs too more than Whitesnake.

Songs with Cozy’s signature: Attack Of The Mad Axeman, But I Want More and Feeling Like A Good Thing (Live).

Now, a side from MSG we have his second solo album. Tilt have jazz-fusion songs like Cat Moves. A rock tracks too like The Blister and Hot Rock. And with some funky thing like The Right Side with another ballad (Because he is a sweetheart) Sunset. Tilt was an anti-commercial album with a nice success. Also, the album have two “Dark” songs which are Living In A Lie and Jekyll Hyde (Inspired of course in Mr.Jekyll and Mr.Hyde... Cozy’s favourite book... such a nerdy.)

7. Brian May Band.

We know how important Cozy was for Brian May’s solo career and Brian himself... (But I’ll not going to talk about this now, because I’m focused only on his drumming.)

Basically Brian told him “Be yourself, I don’t need a type of drumming” So that is what you listen when you listen those three albums... a free, happy Cozy. So powerful as always and creative. Of course Cozy had to be powerful because he was trying to cheer Brian up (He is so sweet). Believe me when I say that this is his best work in his last days! Its amazing the heavy-hand that he still had. For moments you think that you are listening Rainbow by the power of his drumming and the songs are completely stunning.

Songs with Cozy’s signature: Cyborg, The Guv’nor, Resurrection, Rollin’ Over.

Now, his solo album. The Drums Are Back was not a successful album with bad reviews saying that Cozy was recycling himself. I personally don’t think Cozy was recycling himself, I just think that he had his own way to do songs and make albums.In spite the bad critics and no success, the album was top ten in Japan.. HA! The Drums Are Back have really groovy songs like The Drums Are Back, Legend Of The Glass Mountain (He really never got over Rainbow..). Rock songs like The Rocket and Ride To Win. And three ballads (Because he is a sweet-... well you get it) Battle Hymn, Cryin’ and Somewhere In Time.

6. Peter Green Splinter Group.

This album is a proof of Cozy’s versatility and still young drumming.

He and Peter Green got along really well so their chemistry was reflected in the music and live performances (Unfortunately a very few with Cozy) Yeah, the whole album is basically blues, okay? But the thing is that Cozy, no matter how slow the blues was, he would let you know that was him playing the drums.And I need to say that: HE PLAYED BLACK MAGIC WOMAN WONDERFULLY... (just that, back to the point).

Peter didn't tell him how to play drums in Fleetwooc Mac’s songs, Cozy just did it and he did it fantastic. Also, his drumming sounded so young, so strong and with presence. Its mind blowing really because you don’t expect Cozy at the age of 50 playing strongly but he actually did. He did his drum roll thing with just one bass drum, he was still so noisy as always (I’m so sorry just this era puts me soft)

Songs with Cozy’s signature:Homework, Going Down.

And his solo-... oh... right... *Runs to bathroom to cry*

5. 80s Work.

Well, time to time (For not saying always) Cozy liked to participate in his friends’s albums when he had a little free time with the band that he was in at the time. I did this 80s work section here because I cant believe that amount of things that he did while he was playing in other bands (I mean, u r for real?)...I put the most popular ones but out there are a lot of unknown Cozy works in the 80s with several bands. I just felt that his 80s works deserved a position in the ranking. This is another proof of his versatility but, with a little of his style of course.

Songs with Cozy’s signature: Tender Babes by Jon Lord, Night Games by Graham Bonnet, Slow Dancer by Rober Plant, Believe by Tom Galley (Phenomena) Shakey Ground by Bernie Marsden, Running from The Storm by Gary Moore and well.. ETC (and many many etcs)

4. Black Sabbath

This is when Cozy turns his “Beast Mode” on.

I don’t know why, maybe because he knew what Black Sabbath was (Tony: Join my emo band.... Cozy: okay) and what it needed..? because that is his normal drumming..? (I'm sure that is his normal drumming.) But he literally blows your mind in every- fucking *wheezes* song. The three Black Sabbath albums are filled with unexpected Cozy's fills (No matter how many times you've listened to those albums, he is unexpected.) His beat is very heavy and very exact too. He was a fan of Bill Ward so I'll be not surprised if he tried to get that heaviness! (I mean, Cozy has his own heaviness but what I'm saying is that maybe Cozy wanted to make a proper Black Sabbath sound)

Songs with Cozy’s signature: Headless Cross, The Call Of The Wild. Basically all TYR and talk about Forbidden is forbidden... (I’m joking. Is a good album too)

3.Jeff Beck/ RAK

Well, for start I put them together because when Jeff Beck Group disbanded, the following year he signed a contract with Micky Most and RAK. So, he was a secessionist, a well-known secessionist. He was in the circle for someone who needed a powerful-jazzy style. It’s like the 80s works really (omg Cozy get a grip). He was a really demanded drummer, everyone wanted him and he eventually worked with everyone. He had a very well-known beat by that time, you easily can tell was Cozy but he also had to be more open to the different styles that he was asked to play (Basically he can’t play like him all the time). He also had some discredited stuff, like Ballroom Blitz by The Sweet (It’s so obvious) and Superstition by Steve Wonder (I know, I know that it says Stevie played everything BUT NOT IN THIS CASE DON’T BELIEVE HIM. What you hear in the song is Cozy playing.) and more like some Suzi Quatro’s songs.

Songs with Cozy’s signature: Ballroom Blitz, Superstition, Cosmic Wheels, Band Of The Salvation Army Band by Tony Ashton and Jon Lord.

Now his solo stuff: Here comes his baby, his household, his precious treasure, his (okay you get it) Dance With The Devil single. It’s a friendly instrumental which they did for a laugh but it became seriously successful... (Yes, they didn’t mean to do it but they did) Micky Most ask to Cozy if he wanted to be a single and Cozy said yes thinking that it was not going to be a big deal but *BUM* 1 Million of copies sold (Literally Cozy stayed at home two days laying looking at the ceiling because he can’t believe it) Of course they did the Dance with the devil part 2 which is Man In Black but it didn't work as well as the first one.They did Cozy Powell’s Hammer but it was kinda a fail too although the band had several tour dates.

This is when Cozy met his lost brother (okay no) This is when Cozy tried his best to play good jazz but instead came up this.. jazz fusion-rock-weird thing. So the thing here was: Jeff didn't know how to explain Cozy what the wanted him to play and Cozy was getting mad about it (Jeff: You can do ta.. tatada tss, ts ts ta da ta... Cozy: Honestly Jeff wtf?) so he did what he thought was better for the record and Ta-Da! Rough And Ready was born. Cozy’s drumming is a bit lighter and he uses a lot the cymbals for a swing-jazz rhythm.

Songs with Cozy’s signature: Going Down, Ice Cream Cakes, Situation, Short Business.

2. Rainbow.

(Omg Martina are you fcking crazy????) Yes I didn’t put Rainbow in the first place...A new hope for Cozy (This sounds like Star Wars movie or something)

Okay, this is one of his best eras because he was all recovered of his disappointment in music business in 1975. He literally gave up with music (poor babe) until Ritchie called him (Ritchie: Join my emo band... Cozy: okay) . He was ready and decided to show that he wasn't a poor drummer... and he did.He played all his tricks, he was so unpredictable and powerful. He actually was lead drummer (I’m not sure if that exists) He didn't played with the bass like a normal rhythm section, he played with Ritchie. Cozy live with Rainbow was so unbelievable, like the unexpected fill in Catch The Rainbow, Man On The Silver Mountain... To be honest, the first Rainbow album sounds so plain without Cozy, it’s like.. something is missing (Basically Cozy changed the band). His beat is so heavy, strong and incredible.Also his 1812 Overture which is just mind blowing. He was a happy Cozy in Rainbow, that’s why he played so brilliantly (and he was Ritchie’s goal friend... what is better than that?) Cozy did an amazing job in Rainbow... (No words...)

Songs with Cozy’s signature: Stargazer, Run with the Wolf, Mistreated (Live), Lost In Hollywood, Eyes Of The World, Gates Of Babylon, Light In The Black, All Night Long and.. all.(Literally all)

Now, his first solo work: Basically he had nostalgia for Hammer and the press still had bad relationship with Cozy saying things like “He is just Dance With The Devil and nothing more” so Cozy want to make an album so fantastic to shut them up. He called to his friends and all was ready... but they needed a bassist so Cozy took his chance and asked Jack Bruce if he can play in his album (Cozy was such a Cream/Jack fanboy.. he was almost his male crush lol.) Fortunately for Cozy, Jack said yes and they recorded it. The album had a fantastic success, extremely high success. The album had fantastic songs like Theme One (Courtesy of George Martin), The Killer, El Sid, Heidi Goes To Town and one sweet ballad (Sweetheart) The Loner (Dedicated to Jeff Beck... That is actually very cute).

1. ELPowell

(ARE YOU JOKING?????) No, i’m not joking and i’ll tell you why. Also this is when Cozy became a prog nerd.

The only one reason that I chose ELPowell as best Cozy music era instead of Rainbow... it’s because he stepped out of his Comfort Zone. This is the REAL proof of Cozy’s versatility. He did amazing things in Rainbow yes but in the end was rock and roll... This is different, this is progressive rock (I don’t really care about Progressive people’s discussion about 80s progressive rock... I’m talking only about Cozy) and Cozy didn’t know a THING about progressive and he still did it amazing. Of course, he took what Carl did and he simplified it to carry it to what he can do... and he did it very well. He had to learn all the ELP’s songs studying them (That’s when he accidentally listened to all elp discography and some Genesis, Yes and well... he became a nerd) He started to experiment with new percussion instruments that Carl used before.. (Like those bells that you hit them with a little hammer... no? okay) He became a KONG BOY too. He literally learned a whole new drumming style but of course with his Cozy sound. Tarkus played by Cozy is amazing, and when he is doing the Congas in From The Beginning kills me every time (That tank tee and those muscles...) and those drum solos...(Damn) they are really something else. And this is the same case of Rainbow.. he was recovering from his disappointment in Whitesnake so he was so enthusiastic about playing with Keith and Greg.

Songs with Cozy’s signature: Touch and Go, The Score, Mars the Bringer of War.

THIS IS THE END... GOD this took me an eternity and I explained so much i’m so sorry this is not going to happen again. This is the first and the last time that I’ll make a large post! (For my own mental health) This is so large, I didn’t mean to, sorry! Nobody will read it to the end but I don’t care... and if you do thanks very much this costed me two nights <3 (And sorry if there are any grammar errors)

#goooooood #martina get a grip #large post #i did this? for real?#ill die #cozy powell #look what i have to do for you you bastard #i love cozy #Black Sabbath #whitesnake #rainbow #rainbow band #jeff beck group #jeff beck #michael schenker group #elpowell definitely is the best time for cozy #ELPowell #gary moore #and im so tired to tag more

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adenei · 4 years

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Gryffindor Bonding Tales

Percy Weasley comes up with a 'genius' idea to help the new Gryffindors get to know each other. What starts as an awkward meeting turns into a yearly occurrence, transition from ice breakers to typical teenage party games at the start of each year.

...because the world needs more of Harry and the gang bonding as a whole group. Plus, I couldn’t resist throwing in some Romione revelations starting in the second chapter. First chapter is below. Read the rest (as I write and update) on FFN or AO3

“First years, this way!” Harry could hear Percy Weasley, the Gryffindor prefect call as everyone was disbanding from the welcome feast. He, Ron and the rest of the first year Gryffindors followed obediently up all the moving staircases. Harry was frantically trying to remember which way they were going and everything Percy was telling them. It was no use because he was thoroughly lost without a guide by the time they got to the staircase.

“Alright, alright, first years listen up, please!” Percy addressed them all again once they all stopped. “Behind this portrait is Gryffindor Tower. You’ll need the password to enter, and our first password is Caput Draconis.” The Fat Lady swung the portrait hole open to let them enter. All of the first years were taking in the sight of the large common room as Percy continued talking.

“The boy’s dormitory is up the staircase to the left, and the girl’s dormitory is up the staircase across the room over there. You’ll be off to bed now, but tomorrow after dinner we’re going to meet once more for a ‘getting to know you’ activity. We’ll meet down here tomorrow at seven. Now, off to bed!” Percy said a little too harshly.

“All that power’s going to his head,” Harry heard Ron mutter as they climbed the staircase and entered the first year dorm.

“What activity do you think he’s going to make us do? We used to have to do these things called ‘ice breakers’ in primary school. They were awful.” Harry said.

“Not sure,” responded Ron. “None of my brothers have ever mentioned having to do something like that. Must be one of Percy’s ideas to make sure he stands out as prefect.” Ron rolled his eyes.

“Guess we’ll find out in the morning then,” Harry said as he lay down on his bed.

The following evening, Harry and Ron gathered in the common room with the rest of the first years as Percy entered the room swiftly and joined them. “Good evening! I’ve blocked off this spot over here for the evening,” Percy said as Harry and Ron gave each other a look. He may have been new here, but Harry was pretty sure you didn’t reserve space in the common room.

“Let’s all sit in a circle now,” Percy continued as they all sat down. “In order for you all to get to know each other a bit quicker, we’re going to go around the circle and answer the questions that I ask.” All the first years stared at him as if they were being subjected to torture.

“Er, Perce,” Ron interrupted, “Can’t we just do that on our own? Pretty sure we’re all capable of making friends.”

“Yes, Ron, I’m sure you are, but this way no one will be left out if we all do this together,” Percy huffed at Ron’s questioning of the idea. Harry noticed the bushy haired girl, Hermione was it?, sitting triumphantly with a satisfied smile on her face. Was this her doing? If she was muggleborn too, then she’d have to know how ridiculous these sorts of games were. Not that Harry had any friends in primary school because of Dudley, but that’s not how people made friends anyways. It was awkward for everyone.

“Shall we get started, then? Great.” Percy didn’t wait for anyone’s response. “The first question is, ‘What is your favorite chocolate frog card and why?’” he said as he referenced his parchment. “Ron, why don’t you start.”

“Er, alright,” Ron said with another eye roll. “Montague Knightley, since he’s a wizard chess champion.” Ron noticed the obnoxious bushy-haired girl’s hand shoot up in the air as it had done countless times throughout their classes today.

“Yes, Hermione? Would you like to go next?” Percy asked her.

“No. Actually, I was going to suggest that we should probably state our names at least before we answer the first question just in case we don’t remember who each other is.”

“Sure, it’s not like we heard roll calls five times today to learn them,” Ron muttered to Harry who chuckled at that. Harry could easily tell the names of all his Gryffindor classmates, so he wasn’t sure why she was being so persistent about this.

“Now, now, I suppose she has a point. Ron will you re-do yours, but with an introduction?” Percy asked.

“You can’t be serious!” Ron said, but Percy’s look proved him wrong. “Fine. My name’s Ron and my favorite chocolate frog card is of Montague Knightley because he’s a wizard chess champion, and I enjoy playing wizard’s chess. Happy?”

“Yes, thank you. Now we’ll just go around the circle. Harry, why don’t you go next.” Percy said.

“Er, I’m Harry, and I only just got my first chocolate frog card yesterday. It was Professor Dumbledore’s, so I guess that’s my favorite?” Harry wasn’t quite sure how this question was fair to those who were new to the magical world, but he didn’t want to question Percy.

“Very good, very good. Next?” Percy said.

“I’m Neville, and I don’t really collect chocolate frog cards. If I had to choose one I liked, it’d be Beaumont Marjoribanks since he was an Herbologist, and I quite like the subject.”

“I’m Seamus, and my favorite’s Archibald Alderton. He’s famous for blowing his hamlet, and a lot of my underage magic had to do with accidentally doing the same,” Seamus sniggered.

“I’m Dean, and I don’t know much about chocolate frog cards, but I collect Football trading cards. West Ham’s my favorite team, and I have an Ian Bishop card!” Dean said excitedly.

“Er, right then, thanks” Percy said, not really understanding anything that came out of Dean’s mouth.

“I’m Lavender and I like Cassandra Vablatsky’s card best. I just think the idea being a Seer is so fascinating!”

“No way! She’s my favorite, too! I can’t wait to take Divination when we’re third years. I’m Parvati, by the way.” The two girls started giggling and talking quietly about their shared interest.

The bushy haired girl gave them a look. “Well, I’m Hermione, and I’ve never seen a chocolate frog card, so I have no idea what anyone’s talking about. If you told me these were magic specific questions, I would have researched it first so I had an answer.��

Harry thought he sensed a bit of hurt underneath her haughtiness, but she was just so rude that he didn’t care at that point. Even he and Dean were able to make some sort of connection and give an answer, after all.

Percy ignored Hermione’s response and pushed on to his next question. “What do you think your favorite class will be? Same order to keep things simple.”

“I would say Defense seems pretty cool, but Quirrell’s rather odd, so I’m not sure what my favorite would be yet.” Ron answered.

“Same,” agreed Harry.

“Herbology,” said Neville unsurprisingly.

“Potions,” said Seamus.

“Transfiguration,” answered Dean.

“Charms,” both Parvati and Lavender said at the same time, followed by a bunch of giggling.

“Charms as well,” said Hermione stuffily.

“Excellent! One more question, and then I’ll let you off for tonight since I’m sure you’ve already had assignments set, and I have prefect duty anyways. This next question doesn’t have anything to do with school or magic, but it does require partners,” Percy said as he scooched back out of the circle. “Since I’m not a part of it, Ron you can be with Hermione, Harry with Neville, Seamus with Dean, and Parvati with Lavender.”

“WHAT?! Percy that’s not fair and you know it. You just don’t want Harry to be my partner since we’re already friends. That’s bollocks!” If Hermione was hurt by his words, she didn’t show it.

“Stop being dramatic, Ronald,” Percy scolded him. “The question is: What is something you have in common with the person next to you? Two minutes to discuss, then we’ll share.”

If looks could kill, Ron’s scowl would have done Percy in right then and there. He begrudgingly turned to the bushy-haired know-it-all who was waiting expectantly. In order to get this done quickly, and not draw things out, Ron said, “We’re both in Gryffindor. Easy.”

“That’s too easy. There must be something else we have in common. It wouldn’t kill you to talk to me, you know,” Hermione said with a scathing look.

She is so annoying, Ron thought. Why would Percy pair me with her. Why couldn’t he have just given us the person we were sitting across from. Even Parvati or Lavender with their incessant giggling would be better than Hermione ‘I think I’m better than everyone’ Granger.

She broke his thoughts by asking, “Well, my favorite color’s blue, what’s yours?”

“Orange,” he said.

“Hmm, we don’t share any similarities with family either, since I’m an only child and you have several siblings. Do you live in a city or countryside?”

“Countryside.”

“Hmm, opposites again. Favorite ice cream flavor?”

“Chocolate,” Ron said simply.

“Mint for me,” Hermione said sullenly.

Before she could ask any other questions, Percy interrupted. “Alright, let’s see what you all came up with. Neville and Harry, why don’t you go first.”

“We both have July birthdays,” Neville said happily.

Percy nodded approvingly. “Seamus and Dean?”

“We’re both fans of sports, whether it’s football or quidditch! There’s lots of similarities between them,” Dean said eagerly as Seamus nodded.

“Well, Parvati and I haven’t found a thing we don’t have in common yet, starting with our interests in divination, and our favorite color is pink!” Lavender said next.

“Excellent! Ron or Hermione?” Percy asked.

Hermione chewed on her lip and didn’t speak, so Ron said dully, “We’re both in Gryffindor.”

Percy looked a bit surprised, “Surely you could have come up with something?”

“We tried, and didn’t come up with anything in two minutes. Can we move on now?” Ron avoided Hermione as he tried to get Percy to move past them.

“Fine, I need to get going anyway. I’m sure you’ll all become rather close during your time at Hogwarts. Might I suggest getting a headstart on your homework now so it doesn’t pile up on you,” Percy called one last piece of advice as he took off out the portrait hole.

Hermione gathered her things quickly and took off up the girl’s staircase. Ron turned to Harry, “Percy can really be the worst sometimes. Care for a game of wizard’s chess?” Harry nodded as both boys quickly forgot about the awkward meeting they’d just been through.

#gryffindor #harry potter & friends #romione #Ron Weasley #Hermione Granger

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ichosepoorly · 4 years

Text

White Person to White Person

C’mon in here gang. Let’s have a little chat about what all this noise is about.

America.

What a time we’re having.

There is room for growth here. Perhaps there should be mandatory growth of empathy and change that needs to be respected and considered if you want to step outside yourself and think about where we, as a country, have failed. Maybe just consider it as that’s an unenforceable demand.

We have all failed. I certainly have failed more times than I can even fathom or truly comprehend but I am learning and learning and learning to be better in the ways that I can. But we as a society have failed to keep true to the very heart of justice. The term “Bad Apples” keeps getting lobbed around in a context that means “Not All Cops” but perhaps you remember how that idiom ends? “One bad apple ruins the bunch”? We have failed.

The police have failed.

This is not a controversial statement and not one that should elicit a knee jerk reaction to defend them.I know we have been programmed to do so. But let’s look at it objectively. The police have failed and are continuing to fail in their use of unnecessary force and the targeting of people of color.

If every branch of the tree has rot at it’s core then one or two “Good apples” cannot stand a chance (or to be allowed to by perhaps the Boss Bad Apple I don’t know how apple trees work) make the change that’s needed. Are there good people on the police force? Probably? I hope so since I have family members who are police. Are they stopping their fellow officers from being violent against people who are “innocent until proven guilty” as is their creed? Maybe they are. But this isn’t about them. This is about the lack of accountability for these actions that has been ever present in “the force”. But gee willikers if it hasn’t been front and center lately. You can’t deny that. Or... hey maybe you can. Conspiracy theories are flooding out of the White House faster than empty bottles of instant tanner so maybe it’s easy to listen to them than see what’s out there. And it is out there. You don’t have to look far to find it. Maybe you should. Look up at the very least what the police have done to peaceful protesters and children. First Amendment Rights are being smashed in the public eye and that’s the bare minimum of what you should be mad about. It’s easy not to look for them. It’s hard to look at them. And that’s how you know it’s important.

Defunding the police sounds like a scary prospect. But can you look around you? Look behind you and look within you. Is what we have now working? It’s not. Clearly it’s not. It is a broken system. Is it really justice if it only applies to people that look like you? You can’t expect something broken to work and then get mad at the idea of it getting repaired or even replaced in a new way. If you slap another bandage on a severed arm that sucker’s still gonna be severed. What we have been doing, what has been done, is not working. We need change. It’s uncomfortable to see these things and be aware of these things and feel like everything is falling apart. But the foundation has already cracked. You grieve the illusion that was, because it’s what you knew. What you know. But this discomfort is a daily reality for so many people before these past two weeks.

Think about that.

Think about the unease and the anger you feel right now. Every eye roll or angry tweet you start to type and delete. Think about how many people have died at the hands of a broken system that have just been swept under the rug. Imagine being that angry at the people who are opposing you and the rights you think are at stake... and think about that. Think about how that feels and shift your mental mirror to the mother of Trayvon Martin, Sybrina Fulton, who is now running for office in Florida (and Lord I hope she wins). Think about the world she’s lived in since her son was shot in cold blood for buying Sprite and Skittles and being a 17 year old black man. Think about the children of George Floyd who’s father’s life cost as much to the four men who murdered him as a counterfeit twenty dollar bill. His life was worth less than twenty dollars to these men. Breonna Taylor’s life was worth even less to the plain clothes police who broke into her home without announcing themselves and shot her when her boyfriend attempted to protect them from what he assumed (and rightly so) were armed intruders. Think about the reality where this happens on your street, where people you love are killed by the men and women who are supposed to protect them and it’s not on every channel on the news. Think about that. Because it is reality. Because it happens more than any of us have ever heard and that’s the problem. If not for cameras on each of our phones and social media would we even hear a peep about George Floyd’s death? I think we both know the answer.

The system is broken.

Defunding the police means more money will go towards patching the holes in a broken system. Education and housing? Yes? Those need more money we can agree? Good. Getting people well who currently do not have the resources to do so? Gosh that sounds like a good place to drop some money to me! Maybe Defunding sounds like “Disbanding” to you. Which isn’t the case. At least not everywhere. If the answer isn’t defunding the police, there’s really only one way to find out isn’t there? Then think about the “I told you so” you can shout in my face like my Uncle at Thanksgiving if it fails. But... again... what we have? It’s broken.

You say “Let's arrest and hold accountable cops who abuse their power in any way, shape, or form toward any citizen they're bound to protect.” and you’re right which is the fundamental failing in the system but no one is arguing that the victims of the crime with lighter skin tones should be denied justice. This is about the continual and targeted attacks of POC of a system that does not respect them, that does not treat them as they would a white person. You cannot deny that you see the patterns here. If “Black Lives Matter” makes you think that none others do then that’s a heck of a mirror into your own failings my friend and I tell you that in kindness. Justice for a continually abused and wronged group of people rising up again and again and again and again and again asking us to consider their suffering and loss on par with ours, that they matter as much as our own should not offend you. It should knock you back on your heels and make you wonder how the ever livin’ heck we let this go. How we didn’t hear them before. How we haven’t done more. How even trying to offer them a “You absolutely matter!” can set people off about how a profession is just as important as or even more important than human life. Listen to what they’re saying.

Not. Me.

I hate even writing this because mine is not the voice that needs to be heard right now. But I cannot ignore that it fell across my lap and not address it.

White person to white person.

Sit down and listen.

Listen.

LISTEN.

Listen to the people in pain. Listen to the people who are screaming in droves in every state (EVERY STATE if that isn’t amazing I don’t know what is we can’t even agree what to call a deli sandwich of a certain length. (it’s a sub. I will fight you) ). Listen to the people who are mad as hell and suffering. Listen to them and learn. For every life that has been lost to get here please just listen and learn.

Black Lives Matter.

Let’s show them we agree.

#Kitty gets political

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tonystarkissist · 5 years

Text

IronDad Bingo Fic #1

So, y’all I did a thing!

Trope: Protective Peter Parker

Quick Disclaimer: Not TeamCap friendly. I love the Captain, I do, but I just made a thing... and I love the idea of Peter setting these guys straight.

Mr. Stark was a good person. That's all there was to it. He was kind, caring, guilt-ridden, and just an all-around good, good person. It was easy for any sane or reasonable person to see it. It was painfully obvious, no matter how much the man tried to deny it.

Then, sometimes there is just a person in your life that make you laugh a little louder, smile a little bigger and live just a bit better and Tony Stark was that person for Peter Parker.

So when the idiotic, self-righteous, recently pardoned Avengers just-just freaking WALKED IN THE COMPOUND… They accused Mr. Stark as if he were the one that had committed the wrong, like he was the one to blame. No sir. Nope. Peter wasn't about to put up with crap like that. Nobody should ever treat such a person as Mr. Stark the way they treated him.

Tony Stark was the literal definition of rising above the flames. He suffered through trauma, and-and he suffered through loss after loss and betrayal after betrayal over and over again, and Peter was there to witness the resulting panic and anxiety stemming from it. The man would just give and give, and the world would just take and take. And it made Peter's blood boil when the man's supposed friends just showed up expecting to take even more from the man that had already given them so much.

“Bet you’re not too happy to see us either Stark.”

And, really, Peter wasn't supposed to be listening to the conversation… Mr. Stark had left a few minutes ago, instructing Peter to stay put and finish his homework as he went to greet his returning team members. He could hear the entire conversation, listening in without an ounce of guilt, and it took all his willpower to keep himself from marching straight in there and punching those idiots in the face as he listened to his mentor take each verbal blow without even trying to defend himself. Which, by the way, was such a Tony Stark thing for him to do.

“You aren’t gonna lock us in this time around are ya?”

Peter could already estimate the recovery time to be several weeks before he, Pepper and Rhodey are able to convince the genius that he wasn't at all what those ungrateful people had accused him of being.

“Tony, you can't just drop all of your superhero duties to an inexperienced vigilante. You're just encouraging him, and people are going to get hurt. You need to take more responsibility and step in, especially when the people need you. Just because the team had disbanded for a while, doesn't mean you can just take a break from protecting the people.”

That right there. That was the Last straw. Peter marched angrily out of the lab and into the common area where the group was assembled.

It was worse than he had pictured…

There stood Mr. Stark, all alone, standing off to face a group of disappointed Avengers with a blank stare. His chin was held high, but his mouth didn't move. He was stiff, and Peter was just barely able to notice him grabbing ahold of his left wrist, which was already shaking violently.

“How dare you,” Peter seethed, anger in his eyes as he surged onward towards the group.

Steve's eyes widen in surprise when he sees Peter storming into the room. Then he turns back to Tony.

“Tony, who’s this?”

“That's none of your goddamn business, Steven.” Peter snapped, squaring his shoulders as he came to stand next to his mentor.

Tony's eyes had widened in both surprise and anger when Peter stormed into the room. He looked just about ready to reprimand him for disobeying his direct orders, but Peter had a few things to say before he was sent back to the lab.

“Now I want you to listen, and listen closely you pricks,” he seethed. “You have no right to walk into this building and start accusing Mr. Stark like that. Unlike you, he spends his whole day working on trying to fix people's lives, to make them better. And, again, unlike you he gives a crap about the world and the people when they all collectively admit to the group they trust that they're scared. It is completely normal for people to want rules to know that they're being protected in a safe and controlled way! But no! Oh high and mighty Captain America skips along deciding the world is better protected in his own hands! ‘Screw these scared people begging for proper protection. They don't know what they're talking about, but I DO! I wanna do things my own way. Nobody gets to tell me what to do cuz I'm an awesome superhero that helped America when the War. Yippee.’” Peter waved his hands dramatically with a crazed look on his face.

He felt Mr. Stark's hand land on his shoulder and squeeze hard. Peter knew that meant to quit it. He knew the man was getting angry, but he wasn't finished.

“Yeah, nope. You decided to be an arrogant bastard. Then, you, along with the rest of your jolly crew, decide that it's not your own fault when the world and government turns against you for doing something they had explicitly explained they felt was wrong. Instead, you accuse the most innocent and pure man, who only wanted to keep you and the rest of the world safe… He tried to help you! And when things started to look bad, you tucked your tail between your legs and ran! Leaving all the responsibility on this guy! Then! Oh goodness,” Peter laughed humorlessly, “then you have the audacity to waltz in here after being in hiding for almost a year and accuse this man of being irresponsible? Really? Are you that stupid?” The hand on his shoulder squeezes harder.

“Peter,” his mentor warns, voice laced with gritted frustration.

“I'm not finished Mr. Stark,” Peter responds curtly, glancing quickly at him with a stern expression before turning back to the others.

“Back in Siberia? Yeah, you remember that? Yeah, well, Iron Man could have layed you out no problem, just in case you were wondering. Nope. He was the bigger man even when he found out your friend here killed his parents. And, yeah, I'll admit, Mr. Stark could have handled it better, I get that. But he had every goddamn right to feel betrayed and attacked in that bunker. He trusted you, and you lied to him. Then? Oh goodness, this is where it gets really good! You beat the crap out of him! You and you're buddy right there. I can't believe it. I just- wow. Worst friend of the year award- OW!” Peter's head cocks sideways when he feels a painful tug on his right ear.

“That's enough,” Tony responds vehemently, without relinquishing his tight hold on the spiderling’s ear.

“Owowow Mr. Stark,” Peter whined.

“I want you to apologize right now.”

“What?? No! Are you kidd- OwOwOw!”

Mr. Stark released his ear with a small tug and gave a tired sigh.

“You can't attack out of anger Peter. I've told you this. While some of what you said may be true, what they're saying is true too. Now, I want you to apologize and go back to lab where I told you to stay put.”

Peter glares, but, of course, Tony Stark's glare beat him out.

Peter hated how little Mr. Stark believed in himself. There was no need for the man to listen to the lies these people were feeding him. But, Mr. Stark was Mr. Stark, and goodness knows he wouldn't disobey him again.

He turns to look at the group of shell shocked heroes. “I just want you to know… I'm only apologizing because Mr. Stark is an amazing human being that none of you deserve.” His glare hardened and he risked a quick glance to the genius waiting expectantly beside him.

A mischievous grin grew onto his face. “I'm sorry for hurting you're insecure ego Mr. Captain America sir. And I'm only saying that because my dad told me to, not because I wanted to.”

Then, with that, he races out the room before any response could be given. No need to face the wrath of Iron Man before he had to.

Mr. Stark was the best, and he'd spend the rest of his life trying to make him believe it.

Not beta-d so sorry if it sucks

I’m so excited to try out this irondad bingo thing. Uber excited. We’ll see how it turns out I guess lol. Thank you so much @irondadbingo for making me my bingo card. I encourage you all to try it out!

#irondad #irondad fic #tony stark #tony stark is a sensitive cinnamon role that deserves to be protected #peter parker believes it too #peter parker #peter is spiderman #peter loves his irondad #protective peter parker #self-deprecating tony stark #evil teamcap #team iron man all the way #spiderson to the rescue

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dojae-huh · 4 years

Note

I didn't want to criticize ATEEZ in my ask but only express my opinion. I attended an ATEEZ concert in Warsaw 19.04.2019, where they had rented a little hall, so fans really were close to them, and also I was in London at NCT127 concert, where the distance was much more, but still, the NCT concert was undeniably better. Both in terms of the work involved, commitment and precision. They simply were better at what they were doing, because they also were better prepared for that - 1/2

In my opinion, there is still something missing in ATEEZ, and they don't have time to develop themselves, because they again go to another, even bigger tour, that only will kill them and their potential (which of course they have, I'm listening to their songs). But this is only my humble opinion based on what I saw - 2/2

--------------

The members probably trained for several years before the debut, but honing dancing skills is one thing, building the team spirit and cohesion is another. Rock-groups often live long, because they are born in garages, they are made of friends who tested their compatibility going through the hardships of the first stages of their carrier. Idol groups are manufactured. Koreans are very social, they know how to socialise very well, so their groups live longer, than the Western pop-groups, still, when the contracts end, many disband willingly.

I know nothing about Ateez, maybe it is a very well-knit group, my remark is more about NCT. Why is slow-paced raise in popularity is good for them.

They had time to learn and accept their differences, find ways they work the best as a team, develop a bond, become a family. Their lives are quick-paced, one year feels like two (Mark’s words), they need to remind themselves to enjoy the achievements and the moments (was it Johnny’s mother who told him to remember to do that?). Under the pressure it is easy to turn on your friend to let out some steam, discharge frustration (what Jaehyun did to poor Taeyong, the fanservice situation). So it’s better to go through all these trials on smaller scale, with lower stakes. All members say in unison that they’ve matured and learnt a lot during the Neo City tour. They are now much better prepared for longer tours with bigger venues.

You can find videos from the past, when Taeil often did mistakes during dancing. Doyoung was very stiff (he still is, but to a much lesser degree) and awkward. I mean. Jaehyun and Haechan weren’t as stable in singing. Yuta was very unsure of himself, depressed for a long time. Johnny didn’t know his place in the group. Jungwoo had mental breakdowns during his debut.

But now they are professionals. They can dance under the rain on the Apple’s stage, learn a dance in three days, impress all interviewers, be good at variety on American shows and all members speak English to some degree.

Another thing. A singer is popular as long as he/she has good songs. Therefore a singer is dependent on caprice of the song-writers/producers. They need fame as a bargaining chip (you want me, I have fans). NCT has Mark and Taeyong as lyricists, Ten as choreographer, Kun as composer, Doyoung as social-relations and PR-manager, other members can do variety and MC/DJ. Some members also participate in the production, recording. These past 4 (actually 5, ShowChamp) years were spent on obtaining these additional skills. With these skills NCT will be able to both earn money for the group (in case they will have to pay for recording from their own pocket) and actually create their music themselves. That’s a recipe for a long life.

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ctl-yuejie · 5 years

Text

rough translations of an interview i stumbled upon cause @florbexter had the nerve to post our beautiful cast doing a photoshoot ;A; (rough as in: neither chinese nor english are my first language so if you want to correct stuff don’t hesitate to comment or message me + I’m going to translate in a way that it makes the most sense in english - so not necessarily word by word)

you can find the original interview here

專訪／抓包女友偷吃　吳承洋男男吻被掰彎口碑BL劇《HIStory3-圈套》雙CP檔──徐鈞浩、吳承洋、卞慶華、陳廷軒顏值、身材、演技兼具，戲裡撩人開外掛，戲外感情生活卻是比悲傷更悲傷的故事。

Interview: Getting girlfriends stolen & Chris Wu gets “bent”* by a male kiss

File on the double CP of “HIStory3 - Trapped", the BL drama which is in everyone’s mouth right now. Jake Hsu, Chris Wu, Andy Bian & Kenny Chen on looks, physique, acting and their real life stories which are sadder than the dramas plot.

徐鈞浩曾幫曖昧對象組衣櫃，對方卻急著出門約會；卞慶華病倒時遠距女友不來陪，原來已經劈腿；吳承洋最慘，本想送女友戒指幫她慶生，卻目睹小王從女友家走出，他只能躲在車旁悲情高歌阿杜的〈他一定很愛妳〉。

Jake Hsu once helped a girl he was interested in to fix her wardrobe while she was anxious to go on a date; Andy Bian was sick but his girlfriend didn’t come to visit - turns out she cheated on him; Chris Wu had the worst experience when he wanted to give his girlfriend a ring for her birthday but witnessed the guy she was cheating with coming out of her house - he could only hide behind a car and do nothing but sadly sing Adu's “He must love you very much”.

HIStory系列上一檔《越界》叫好叫座，帶給《圈套》主角們不小的壓力，不過該劇首播成績亮眼，相較於《越界》同期成長近50%。《圈套》講述熱血警察與黑道少主的禁忌戀，預告中吳承洋慢慢解開徐鈞浩的襯衫扣子，接著對他耳語：「最後一顆了。」腐味四溢撩得觀眾心花怒放。吳承洋在戲裡率先淋浴賣肉，秀出零贅肉的結實體態，四位主角的身材一個比一個養眼，他們公推卞慶華是浩克等級，而練特技體操的陳廷軒屬精瘦型，體脂肪只有8%。

"Crossing the Line/ Boundary Crossing”, the top film in the HIStory series, has brought a lot of pressure to the protagonists of "Trapped”. However, they started the show of with remarkable ratings, having a nearly 50% increase compared to "Crossing the Line/ Boundary Crossing” in the same period. "Trapped" tells the story of the the taboo love between a hot-blooded policeman and a mob boss. In the preview, Chris Wu slowly unbuttons Jake Hsu’s shirt and whispers: "There’s only one left." The amount of “gay-vibes”** left the audience fully enthused. Chris Wu showed of his strong body with 0% body fat in the shower scene. The physique of each of the four main characters is more eye-catching than the other. Andy Bian’s body is said to be Hulk grade while Kenny Chen, who practiced acrobatic gymnastics, is the lean type with only 8% body fat.

師徒再聚首緣分深說到練特技，陳廷軒突然現場認師，說吳承洋兩年多前曾到北體代課，當過他的特技老師，更直呼：「我國中時有追過他！」其實吳承洋已非新人，他曾是Super131的成員，畢業於戲曲學院的他專長就是特技體操。天然呆的陳廷軒繼續在傷口上撒鹽，說：「Super131是『那個年代』國中生的偶像，以前同學們都會追，還列印一張他們的照片貼在教室門口。」既是特技老師，又是國中時期的偶像，可見兩人緣分多深，不過陳廷軒笑說之前吳承洋來代課時沒認出他，讓吳承洋忍不住自嘲：「是我太邋遢了嗎？」陳廷軒急忙解釋：「沒有啦，是我沒有把這三個人（指Super131成員、代課老師、吳承洋本人）聯想在一起。」卞慶華笑說：「你看他真的就像戲裡的趙子一樣單純，沒被社會汙染。」

Teacher and apprentice reunite after a long time Speaking of practicing stunts, Kenny Chen suddenly recognized Chris Wu as a substitute teacher at the North Sports School. He was his stunt teacher more than two years ago. Even more bluntly he exclaimed “I have chased him during my time!". In fact, Chris Wu is not a newbie. He was a member of Super 131 and he graduated from his drama school with a specialization in acrobatic gymnastics. Kenny Chen continued to add insult to injury and said, "Super 131 were the idols of the junior high school students during that era. Students would chase them, print pictures of them and paste them on the door of the classroom."

As Chris Wu is his former stunt teacher and idol of his middle school period, we can see how deep their relationship is. Kenny Chen laughed about not recognizing Chris Wu as his substitute teacher before. Chris Wu then asked whether he had been too sloppy to remember, so Kenny Chen hastily explained that he just hadn’t connected the dots between the Super 131 member, his substitute teacher and Chris Wu himself. Andy Bian laughed saying, "You see, Kenny is just as simple as Zhao Zi in the drama. Not corrupted by society."

徐鈞浩之前曾在《天黑請閉眼》中獻出男男吻，是四人中唯一不是將床戲、吻戲初體驗獻給對方，吳承洋入戲佯裝吃醋：「我第一次獻給你，結果你第一次不是給我！」聊起戲裡的第一場吻戲，徐鈞浩竟還搞失憶，經吳承洋提醒才想起就是「最後一顆扣子」的橋段，徐鈞浩坦言接吻前一度擔心生理上抗拒，「跟男生接吻是難在不知道身體合不合得來？結果馬上就很進入狀況。」

Jake Hsu had previously had a male/male kissing scene in"Close Your Eyes Before It's Dark". He is the only one out of the four of them, who has had experience with shooting a kiss and a bed scene. Chris Wu pretended to be jealous and complained, “I gave you my first time but your first time wasn’t with me”.

Talking about the first kiss in the drama, Jake Hsu suddenly lost his memory. Chris Wu reminded him that the “last button” scene was connected to it. Jake Hsu admitted that he was worried about physical resistance before kissing. "It's hard to kiss a boy without knowing whether your bodies fit, no? But the result turned out to be very good."

吳承洋甚至語出驚人說：「親完會想交男朋友！」引起眾人起鬨，進一步問他是否有被掰彎的可能性？他語帶曖昧說：「不排除未來的可能性，我覺得演完之後會改觀，不會再對男生感到抗拒。以前小時候不懂，看到男生跟男生牽手會覺得奇怪，現在只覺得那都是愛。」

Chris Wu astonished everyone when saying, "After finishing the kiss scene I felt like looking for a boyfriend!", causing everyone to make a fuss and ask him whether it’s possibly that he has been “bent”*. He said ambiguously: "I won’t rule out the possibility for the future. I think after filming I might not resist feelings towards boys anymore. I didn't understand it when I was young. It felt strange to see boys holding hands with boys. Now I just think it's all love.”

痴情漢慘淪工具人巧合的是徐鈞浩和吳承洋都是摩羯座還同一天生日，擅長組裝的兩人都曾幫心儀對象組家具，卻慘淪工具人的命運。徐鈞浩苦笑說：「我喜歡一個人就會願意一直付出，我真的去過女生家裡組衣櫃，結果她把我放在家裡，說要去跟男朋友約會，What？我那天才知道她有男朋友，心酸的是我還組完才走。」

An Infatuated man is a tool Coincidentally, Jake Hsu and Chris Wu are both Capricorns, even sharing the same birthday. Both of them are good at assembling furniture, but are suffering the fate of tools. Jake Hsu said with a wry smile: "When I like a person I’m putting in my everything. One time I really went to a girls home to fix her wardrobe. When I got there she told me that she would go out on a date with her boyfriend. What? That day I came to know that she had a boyfriend I had to finish fixing her wardrobe while being sad.”

卞慶華則分享在重病時被遠距姊姊女友劈腿的慘痛經驗，「那次我從盲腸炎變成腹膜炎，差點敗血症快死掉還住院，那個女生的媽媽有來看我，她卻不來，我就覺得怪怪的。」一個月後出��，揪對方跨年也遭拒，後來滑IG從朋友的朋友動態裡，看到女友跟別的男生出去跨年，卞慶華才認清現實，斷絕聯絡。

Andy Bian shared his painful experience of breaking up with a girlfriend after he was seriously ill. "I had appendicitis (inflammation of the appendix) which turned into peritonitis (inflammation of the peritoneum). I almost died of a sepsis and was hospitalized. The girl’s mother came to see me, but she didn’t come so it felt weird. After a month I was discharged from the hospital. Then I got stood up(?) by her during New Year’s.” Later, on a friends friends ig, he saw that she went out with other boys during New Years. Andy Bian realized the truth and broke off contact after that.

聽完兩個痴心換絕情的故事，吳承洋不敵眾人逼問，吐露：「我有現場抓到過！」完勝度引起全場驚呼，原來他女友曾私約小王到家中，卻騙他不在家，不知情的吳承洋到女方家門口想給她驚喜，卻看到小王從她家走出，「我嚇到趕快躲到車子旁，腦海冒出一句歌詞：『我應該在車底，不應該在車裡。』很心酸，而且我躲的那台車居然還是那個男生的車，我嚇一大跳，怎麼是這台？他發動了，他開走了，我完全不敢動，結果沒被發現，這時手上還拿著她的生日禮物，突然怒火衝上來，我就按門鈴，把要送給她的戒指用丟的給她！」大夥虧他幹嘛亂丟戒指，乾脆拿去當鋪，吳承洋則說那戒指沒有很貴，也撇清不是要求婚。 After listening to the two stories Chris Wu said that he had “caught his girlfriend in the act” causing the crowd to lose it at this victory. Turns out that his then girlfriend had a lover over at her place but lied to him about it. Chris Wu went to her house to surprise her only to see the other man come out of her house. “I was scared so I hurried and hid behind a car. There were these lyrics in my mind: “I should be under the car, not in the car." It was very sad. But it turns out that the car I was hiding behind was the man’s car. How is that possible? He started to drive away and I didn’t dare to move so I wasn’t discovered.” At this point he still had her birthday present so he rang the doorbell and threw the ring at her. Why did I throw the ring instead of taking it to a pawnshop? Chris Wu explained that the ring wasn’t very expensive and that it wasn’t meant as a proposal.

碰壁不放棄獲重生在四人中資歷最深的吳承洋星路上跌跌撞撞，團體解散後，經歷在北京一年零收入、沒地方住的克難日子，後來回台當兵砍掉重練，可是換了新東家依舊不順，試鏡碰壁兩年，好幾次想放棄演藝圈，全靠著內心深處的信念「我相信我可以做到」苦撐著。直到接了這部BL劇《圈套》終於碰上貴人，「當青蓉導演（李青蓉）跟我說她相信我的時候，我覺得……很感動。」講到這裡，他忍不住哽咽淚崩，感性地說：「她願意給我機會，相信我可以把這件事做好……我之前每次去試鏡，沒有人相信我可以做到。」雖然目前吳承洋尚未還完之前打官司的錢，但他很感謝這些挫敗的過程，造就現在的他，「因為有這些經歷，讓我可以把戲演好，當人生遇到很大的打擊時到底是什麼狀態，很多人是靠想像的，但真實遇到的痛苦是並不顯露於外的。除此之外，最重要的還是要勤練功，努力做好該做的功課。」

Don’t give up being reborn

Chris Wu, the most experienced out of the four, has stumbled on his road to success. After his group disbanded, he didn’t have an income for one year and didn’t have a place to live in Beijing. During the difficult days when there was no place to live, he returned to Taiwan to serve as a soldier and cut down on his training, but his new boss(?) wasn’t satisfied. He hit a wall with auditions for two years and wanted to give up entering the entertainment business several times. He could only rely on the deep belief in his heart that he could do it until he got picked for the BL drama “Trapped”.

“After finally meeting the “noble” director Qingrong (Li Qingrong) I was very touched with her saying that she believed in me.” When he talked, he couldn't help but shed tears. He emotionally said, "She was willing to give me a chance and believed that I can do this thing well... I used to audition many times, but no one ever believed that I could do it."

Although Chris Wu still has an ongoing lawsuit with his previous company he is thankful for all the experiences because they have made him who he is today. "Because of these experiences, I’m able to be a better actor. When people are faced with obstacles they have to rely on imagination and don’t show the real pain they’re going through. Besides that the most important thing is to practice hard and do the homework.”

*i think this is a quite common term that appears in a lot of news coverage of BLs and gets used frequently by actors talking about their series, i really don’t like the term in english though

** literally “rotten”. same as in the Japanese “Fujoshi”=“Rotten Woman”. again not liking the taboo this word places on homosexuality but what is new

#history3圈套 #history3: trapped #history 3: trapped #ahhhh #long post #tbh i can't believe their real lives are more dramatic than a freaking copxgangster drama :"D

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nagatsukinura119 · 5 years

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Japan Expo Malaysia Day 1 (26 July 2019)

Okay, it’s the first day for one of the biggest Japanese events in Malaysia, I originally came here only to attend AKB48’s concert, because my Oshimen, Okada Nana (Naachan) was one of the members who were coming. Since I live in a nearby country, so it was possible for me to come (with my parents) not to mention the ticket prices were considerably cheap. So I was a bit bummed that my mother might not let me go alone to attend the concert, but thankfully from the first day my parents seemed to feel comfortable and confident to let me go to the venue (Kuala Lumpur Pavilion) since it is located near to our hotel (Capitol Hotel). So in the morning I arrived at Pavilion at 11 am and killed some time at Daiso at the top floor and got a sweet black hat with golden Apple logo (if you know me, you’d know why I had a compulsion to buy this hehe). When I came downstairs, they were just opening the expo and the very first performance, a Kyodo (archery) performance was starting and I took the time to rest at the Coffee Bean next to the stage. Afterwards, the first idol group to perform was called KiREI. Now, I’ve never heard of this group before this expo and I didn’t bother checking on them. But we were told that KiREI is a group made up of 3 disbanded idol groups in Tokyo. Their theme is to "Make Everything Beautiful" not just their inner but outer appearances. One of the hosts (Aki) kept telling us audience that they were super cute and I challengingly said, “Sway my heart babe”. So the girls came in; Tanaka Hana, Konatsu Mia and Miyadera Miho. Sure they were cute and beautiful (which idol isn’t, am I right?)

(From the left; Hanapii, Mianyan and Chori-chan)

Nevertheless, I took the chance to take pictures of them with my Nikon camera. I was standing at one side of the stage and since there were some empty seats it was quite easy access for me to take pictures of them. But what I did NOT expect was when one of the members, Hana (nicknamed Hanapii) actually made an eye contact with me and WINKED. My heart MELTED (jokes on me; my heart wasn’t just swayed lololol). Maybe I’m a sucker because this was my very first time attending an idol concert, but gosh darn it I just fell for her on the spot. Aside from that coincidental moment, I realized her face is totally my type among the 3 of them, not to mention she’s also pretty tall (well I’m super short so for some people she could be a medium height). Side note: during their performance the wotage group was doing the Overture chant and I joined them from far away (lol) and it was actually a bit awkward since it seemed like I was the only female who was chanting passionately. Also, another side note, there was this adorable old man who was a huge fan of Harupiii (another idol that performed after KiREI) but I think he’s a fan of idols in general cuz he was also singing along to KiREI’s songs. Back on track, after getting wink attack-ed by Hanapii I was so moved that I paid 150% attention on them. And while I was snapping pics at every second and taking vids, what do you know? She saw me again and made an eye contact again! I realized that she was THE ONE in this group. She’s my KiREI Oshimen.

(Yeah baby!)

Time flew really fast and before I knew it, their slot time was over (most of the idol performances had only 30 to 45 minutes time slot) but thankfully they were having another performance outdoor in the afternoon so I was sure I’d attend it. After KiREI was Harupiii (who is an idol who has performed in this event for 3 years).

Harupiii definitely looked younger than the KiREI members but you know what, that didn’t stop me from staying and watched her performance till the end. What I like about Harupiii is that despite being quite small, looked young, she definitely slayed the performance and I was hooked with her. All the more when she saw me, and finger gunned me (OOF!!) Another hit right on the heart! What’s with these idols making me fall faster than flies lololol!

The wota guys were more hyped this time and so was I and the old man fan ran to the wotage guys and started to enthusiastically chant for her. And you know what, I find it adorable. Especially when one of the guys was carried on other men’s shoulders to the front. I really really like their enthusiasm and I can see why wota life is pretty exciting. I just wished that the awkward atmosphere wasn’t lingering, but YOU KNOW WHAT? SCREW IT, LET’S HAVE FUN!

After the end of Harupiii’s performance I was exhausted so I went back to my parents at Coffee Bean. They told me to get an autograph and picture from KiREI’s members you gotta buy some merch (I mean, that’s how their business works so I knew the procedure). At first I wasn’t sure to go or not but my mother was being encouraging and persuasive made me go for it, and you know what, GG mum! You made the right decision for me! It was worth spending RM80 ($14) to get 2 Cheki tickets (one for autograph and handshake, and another for polaroid photos). I was legit happy since this was my very first time attending a meet-and-greet event with a Japanese idol, and while I used to do translations and subs for some AKB48 stuff, I’m not that confident with my Japanese speaking skills but Hanapii made it so much easier and fun. Albeit she knew limited English, but we managed to communicate successfully. As for the poses I thought we were gonna do the usual heart poses like the guys in front of me did with other members. Well we did just that, but since I bought two tickets so I got to take two photos, and I did not expect that she hugged me (well more like she reached her arms out towards me and leaned in, but close enough, man!) The conversation continued as she was signing the polaroid frames (side note: she asked for the alphabets for my name which was pretty funny considering how easy the pronunciation is, even in Japanese) but at the same time it’s nice how considerate she was. So she asked me if I was a Malaysian and I told her no, I’m a Bruneian which impressed her and I told her that it’s because of this event that I flew over which impressed her even more (I really like how idols tend to give cute reactions when they’re impressed). Then she complimented me for my Japanese and naturally I was like “No no no~ I need to study more” and she was like “Ganbatte~!”. AH SO CUTE! She then asked if I liked idols. If only she knew. But I just told her, “Yes, I love idols”. As much as I loved talking to her I didn’t want to take too long since there was a long line behind me so I told her I was leaving and she was like “We’re gonna perform again outside!” and I responded with an enthusiastic nod, “I will DEFINITELY come!” I was legit happy to the point of shaky hands and happy tears when I came back to our table (Extra note: mum took some pics and video when I was lining up for the merch).

(Polaroid photo with Hanapii! I’m too ugly so I blocked my face lololol)

My parents wanted to go elsewhere, but I told them I was gonna stay there for more performances. So I was finally left on my own (WHOOOOO!). While waiting for KiREI’s next performance I decided to take the time to post things in my social media, and also look for KiREI’s and Hanapii’s Twitter accounts. I love that when I shared my experience with my Discord friends, they were so supportive and happy for me (I love y’all!).

So for the afternoon performance at the outdoor stage I was surprised that 15 minutes before it began the space was rather empty except by shoppers and a handful of fans so I was like shimmying my way to the front because once again, I was self-conscious for being like the only enthusiastic female fan (was I already considered a fan?). There were even some guys nearby who I could hear talking about me, saying, “Look, she’s waiting there, how cute”. It wasn’t anything negative per say, but it just made me more self-conscious lol. So about 10 minutes before starting and the girls were seen strutting towards the backstage and I find it funny yet adorable that they didn’t need some security to cover them. I guess this shows how chill the audience here is. I mean, Mianyan jogged past me and brushed my shoulder a bit, but I just acted chill. I know why one can get excited when their favorite celebrity is around, but for goodness sake some crazy fans need to chill.

Since no one was really taking the front row (this time it was an outdoor stage so there were no seats), I just slipped my way to the left side of the stage. A few more minutes till starting and the girls made their way next to the stage and it’s adorable I could see them doing the chanting thing, where they go “Ganbatte, ikuzo! Ohh~” I was already in my wota mode so I managed to take pictures of them doing that.

Before I attended this concert, I didn’t know why people would kill their money to get front rows, but now I can see why! The reason why I know now is because as I watched their performance right in front, the eye contacts you get from the artists are more direct and you feel like you made more intimate and personal connections with them. I KNOW THIS BECAUSE HANAPII MADE SEVERAL EYE CONTACTS WITH ME THAT I FELT SO OVERWHELMED I HAD TO LOOK AWAY (not all the time). Okay this may sound pretentious, but I honestly think when Hanapii saw me her smile doubled the radiance cuz I could see her smile reaching her eyes during those times. I tried to take pictures and videos of all three girls but you can really tell my bias for Hanapii was evident from the pictures I’m sharing here lololol.

(KiREI performing)

(Chori-chan at the back is literally me on the inside lol)

More, more fun things happened when I went to take pictures with Hanapii for the second time. This time it seemed Mianyan and Chori-chan were familiar with me and they kept looking at me as I interacted with Hanapii. She remembered me so she was like “Ahh~ Nura-chan~ welcome back” and I swear my heart was pierced by that and I just covered my face out of embarrassment and said, “I’m back”, then she responded with the heart throbbing line, “Eh~ I’m so happy! I love you!” which naturally made me embarrassed and hid my face again and she was like “Nande, nande?” GURL YOU DON’T KNOW HOW MUCH POWER YOU HAVE OVER ME EVEN THOUGH I’VE ONLY KNOWN ABOUT YOU FOR 3 HOURS! So we did new poses and while she signed the polaroid frames she started chatting with me like “Where are you staying” and so I told her I was staying at a nearby hotel and she was like “Ah me too! I stay in a hotel” Ah of course you do sweetheart, so cute. And I jokingly asked, “Which hotel?” And she responded, “We’re not supposed to say yet.” AHAHAHA SO CUTE. Then she told me she saw me taking so many pictures (well I did stand at the first row so heheh). I complimented everyone and naturally they thanked me (Ahhh Mianyan and Chori-chan were so cute too). After that I made a mistake to look at Hanapii in the eyes and once again hid my face, but to make things worse (or better) they were all like “Kawaii~~~” GAH THESE GIRLS I SWEAR. And she also patted my head while doing so. I. Was. Dead. So after that she apologized for being sweaty and I was like “No, no, you’re still very cute.” And believe me when I said that she gave this blinding smile and I thought, “Welp, she got me in the palm of her hands.” Once again she apologized for sweating so much and started to talk about the heat. Being the concerned fan that I was, I asked her, “Are you okay? Y’know, with this crazy heat?” I could tell she was trying to ease my worries and said “Yeah! I’m okay, I got used to it.” Once again, I didn’t want to take too much time, so I proceeded to leave but before leaving I told her that I was coming again the next day, to which she thanked me for and said she’ll look forward to it. As I was leaving (while clutching on my new polaroid pictures) I looked at all three girls and said “Ganbatte~” and they all cutely waved while saying their thanks.

(More pics with Hanapi hehehehehe)

Since I was sweating bullets (curse the heat and black clothes lol) so I went back inside for the AC and sat on the stairs leading towards the center stage. What was going on was an AirAsia dance performance by their staff. I gotta say for non-dancers, they did pretty good, especially with the fact they danced in their working uniforms! Then I looked around the shopping mall in search of my parents, only to find out they were elsewhere. So I decided to stay a bit longer. While doing that, a boy band called cosmic!! was performing and for goodness sake were the boys CUTE! Okay, I may be biased, but I really prefer J-pop male idols over K-pop male idols because I can actually distinguish their faces, and not to mention they did not to wear much makeup and to me they still looked handsome and cute. Also based on their facial expressions, they looked they were having so much fun and also interacting with the fans (who were definitely having so much fun too considering how vigorous they were with their glowsticks).

(cosmic!! having fun performing on stage)

To be continued in Day 2!

Bonus picture

(Hanapii be like ‘I’m a goddess’ lmaooo)

#JapanExpoMalaysia2019 #KiREI #Harupiii #cosmic!!

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doryuniversum · 5 years

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Tumblr is like an Island. Beautiful, intriguing and fun to explore. However, over time, you become Tom Hanks and eventually find a sphere-like object. You name it Wilson, and he’s your best friend.

Greetings to all!

First and foremost, I’d like to thank you for coming and taking the time to look over my own personal tumblr blog (that is, if you’re coming from The Seven Wands Chronicles page). If you happen to stumble upon this blog, then I welcome you as equally as everyone else with open arms!

I have started many blogs in the past, and it would be a lie if I said that I haven’t been a member long -- because I have been. Needless to say, I was never the committed type, so I would create blogs, post once and then disappear for about several months to a few years on end. I do like blogging, it gives me this sense of relief. Relief of stress, worry, anxiety, sadness, bursts of excitement, happiness -- mostly just stress, though.

Oh, crap!

I nearly forgot, excuse me and apologies [insert praying hands emoji here]. I go by the name Dory. My real name is confidential as I like to keep my personal life and my online life separate in terms of Hobbies and such. A lot of people ask me where I got the nickname “Dory” from. Well, the character, Dory in the popular movies, Finding Nemo, and Finding Dory has what she calls, “Remembory Loss.” Yes, you read correctly, that isn’t a typo. Dory called it, “Remembory Loss.” With that being said, I am a very forgetful person. You could tell me your most deepest, darkest secret and then 5 seconds later, I would have forgotten what you told me. I’m not very good with remembering birthday’s, appointments, due dates for college assignments and such, but I’m working on it. Hence, my nickname, Dory. It isn’t essentially to be proud of, considering it might be a bad thing towards my health, but, it’s always been that way.

What I do on tumblr is merely for fun, not for profit, not to sell, nada. I just simply want to have fun. I make intense, over-the-top fanfics, sometimes I’ll edit things here and there or just simply post things like this. I still don’t know how to use Tumblr - even though I’ve been here for quite a while - so I probably look/sound/type like a noob.

To get some things out of the way, cleared up and disclaimed, I AM NOT a PERFECT or TOP NOTCH writer. English is my native language and my grammar may not be the best (if you read my posts or anything from The Seven Wands Chronicles, then you’d probably notice it if you’re the grammar police). I wasn’t very good at writing when I was in high school and always felt like it was a chore to do. Which is kind of weird, considering I love, love, love reading books and fanfics. I was exceptional in reading classes, but never in writing classes, so that’s just -- strange to know and think about. Nothing wrong with it, many people can be good in one area but not the other.

Another thing about me that -- probably doesn’t come off as a suprise these days -- is that I’m an absolute fan of KOREAN POP. And before you all bombard me with who I stan or who is my bias or who my favorite groups are, let me just through this out there. My favorite group is BTS. Yes, I know, I probably got an eyeroll, a groan, a “really?”, or something that is in the concept of annoyance. I know, I’M SORRY. I love them a lot and it’s hard to fall out of love with them. They are all equally talented, funny, super smart, super intelligent and just brighten up my day. I love other groups as well, like, EXO, Got7, B.A.P, Super Junior, Jo Kwon, NCT (I’m new to them, I’m still learning!), 4Minute, 2NE1, G-idle, BewhY, Jay Park, Okasian, Dean, Big Bang, Jessi Ho, TVXQ, Ikon, Winner, and there are a lot more, I swear. Also, before I get sacked, I know some of the groups have disbanded (SADLY), but I still love their music very much.

I don’t know if I mentioned this, but I am a college student, currently majoring in Psychology. I plan to be a school psychologist for younger children who need guidance if they are in a situation that calls for it. I was inspired to choose this career by my first niece who was raised in a household that was not very healthy for her physically, mentally and emotionally. She’s alright, very safe and sound, a bright ball of sunshine, INTELLIGENT and super hilarious. Before she was born, I had no idea what I wanted to be career wise and was stuck in this 2 year procrastination until she was born so I thank her every day for coming into existence (cough-cough, I thank her parents too).

I feel like I’ve gone over everything mainly that I wanted to tell you all. I hope you enjoyed(?) this as much as I wrote it. If you want to learn more about me, feel free to click the “About Dory” tab!

I’ll post again soon!

#me personal #kpop #bts #fanfic #fanficiton #introduction #first post #psychology

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dondake · 6 years

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[akamido] of you and me

rating: t summary: Everything I’ve had I’ve worked for, and I’ve gotten myself. I’ve built myself from the ground up.

The Midorima family business had a quiet fall from grace until Kise Ryouta decided to mention it in his naturally carrying voice in a little gastropub in Tokyo. “Midorima, that reminds me,” he said, drawing all eyes on him as he was addressing a member of the group he rarely personally interacted with. “How are you doing? I saw what happened on the web; hope your family’s doing okay?”

Midorima turned back to the menu in his hands. Aomine, between him and Kise, turned to his right. “What are you talking about, Kise?”

“It’s nothing,” Midorima said.

“Oh, you haven’t heard? It sounded like Midorima’s parents’ company went bankrupt or something! I mean, I don’t keep up with that kind of stuff, but I read that they’d been losing money and had to keep cutting staff and last week, they just went and closed and everything! I don’t really understand it myself, so I wanted to check in today. Midorima-cchi, are you doing okay? You don’t need to drop out of university, do you? My manager could probably get you something, you’re tall and you’ve got a good figure. What of your sister? Isn’t she finishing high school? Does she need to go straight to being an office lady or--”

“Kise,” said Midorima. “Drop it.” Kise opened his mouth to protest and Aomine nudged him, hard, in the side. While this might have elicited a squeal of protest from anyone else, Kise was soft for Aomine and closed his mouth immediately. Still, with everyone’s eyes on him, Midorima had no choice but to sigh and explain himself. “Yes, it’s true that my family’s company has declared bankruptcy. The Board had made several bad investments in the past few years and it was too much to recover. It isn’t like the company has evaporated overnight; they’re still working on sorting out all the debts and manage our remaining employees. But my family is doing fine, thanks for asking.” He waved down a waiter to take their order, effectively ending the conversation.

As they were collecting their jackets at the door, Murasakibara and Momoi helping Aomine carefully handle a tipsy Kise flirting with everyone at the bar while Kuroko watched passively, Akashi cocked his head. “You didn’t tell me your family had been in trouble,” he said.

Midorima did not meet his eyes as he hitched Momoi, Kise, and Aomine’s jackets in his arm. “Would I have talked about my family’s shame even to my closest friend? Especially someone who is heir to an equally weighted familial responsibility?” When he finally looked up, the emotion in his eyes had been controlled to an impasse. “My personal problems are not any of your concerns, no offense.”

“Of course not,” Akashi said, taken aback. “But...well, as you’ve said, I’ve also got the weight of my father’s company on my shoulders so I know what that’s like. I suppose it isn’t proper asking how your family is faring financially but - you’re finishing a business degree, aren’t you? I know that isn’t what you’ve wanted to do, so are you able to start a medical--”

“Akashi,” Midorima interrupted, his voice steely. “I don’t start something I won’t finish.” He turned and handed Kise his jacket in one smooth motion, as if he had rehearsed the gesture. He helped Momoi into her peacoat, as she chatted to keep Kise upright and distracted as Aomine quickly slipped into his coat and slipped his arm back around Kise’s waist to stabilize him. Murasakibara and Kuroko returned from paying the tab.

“Yeah,” Aomine said, once they reached the sidewalk. “How much do we owe you? Just send me the request on Paymo.”

“Sure,” Kuroko said.

“I got you,” Kise slurred, looking over at Midorima. “Send me Midorima-cchi’s share too, don’t worry about it!”

Midorima’s lips drew into a thin, tight line. “I don’t need handouts. I can pay my own way, thanks.” Aomine hurried Kise along, although his glance back at Kuroko was clear enough that Midorima’s portion was to be split between the rest of them. Midorima fell back in the group, tense and unwilling to engage in any more unnecessary discussion.

Akashi fell in step with him. “I’m sorry. For what I said earlier. It was out of line, too early…”

“Don’t worry about it,” Midorima said, although his tone was clipped, almost mechanical. “How long do you think we’ve known each other? I know what you mean.”

At the train station, Kise had thrown both arms fully around Aomine’s neck, comfortably settled into his needy mode for the night. “Aww,” he whined, resting his temple on Aomine’s neck. “I wish I lived on your guys’ side of the city. I hate being so far away. I’m so jealous that Aomine and Kuroko and Midorima go to university together and Akashi’s like...a bus ride away and Murasakibara and Momoi live together and it’s just not fair that I’m on the other side of Tokyo! Won’t one of you come and live near me already!”

“You’re disrupting the other riders,” Aomine chastised. “I told you I’ll see you home so you won’t pass out in a ditch somewhere, so be quiet already.”

“How completely transparent,” Murasakibara grumbled as Aomine and Kise boarded the train going west. “He could have just said he was going over to hook up.”

Momoi tugged on her boyfriend’s ponytail. “Shh. We’re not supposed to know, remember?”

“I suppose it’s just you and me on the walk back to campus,” Kuroko said.

“I suppose so,” Midorima agreed.

“Akashi, you don’t want us to walk to you to your apartment?” Momoi offered. “It’s just a few stops from ours, so it’s not a problem. It’s a warm night, so Atsushi and I won’t mind.”

“It’s fine,” Akashi said, smiling. “Don’t worry about it.” He watched her lean her head against Murasakibara’s shoulder through the train window. Kuroko had already pulled out a book and was discussing it with Midorima, across from them. Akashi found himself on the train platform, feeling suddenly very alone.

[=]

After his only son left for high school in Kyoto and returned to Tokyo for university, Akashi Masaomi decided to sell his big house for a smaller, still elegant abode in a quiet Tokyo suburb. Akashi commuted to school from an apartment closer to campus and spent his weekends at home, where his father was already helping indoctrinate him into the family company on a part-time basis. As he left his own study late one night, Akashi found Midorima putting on his shoes in the foyer. “Midorima,” he said, the surprise apparent in his voice. Since graduating high school, he had learned the proper time to suppress his emotions, which was not all the time. “I didn’t know you were here.”

Midorima’s head was half turned, ready to leave. “I was only here to...discuss something with your father. I figured you were busy, so I did not think it was right to interrupt you.”

“Nonsense; you’re never a bother to me. Are you leaving already? I can put tea on; I’d love to hear about how your thesis is going so far…”

“No, I must be going. Going to campus from my house is an extra half hour, so I don’t want to go to sleep too late. I’m feeling exhausted as it is.” Of course, Akashi thought. With his father’s company disbanded, Midorima was probably staying at his family home more often to help sort out their affairs.

“Right. Well...if you ever need anything, you have my number.”

“Yes. Good night, Akashi.”

Akashi found his father sitting in the living room with the big window open. He was smoking a cigarette, a rare sight in the house. Masaomi only smoked when something very satisfying happened to him. It made Akashi very curious about what he and Midorima had talked about, but one of Masaomi’s number one rules of effective business involved never stating one’s purpose outright. Akashi brought his reports to the couch and peered over them at his father. Masaomi’s hair was ruffled, relaxed, and the top button of his shirt undone; in this state, his father must be ready to sleep for the night and content for the day.

“I saw Midorima at the door. I didn’t know he had come for a visit.”

Masaomi tapped some ash into his marble ashtray. “That boy is talented, he is,” he said, not quite answering Akashi’s implicit question. “That’s the true value of good schools; it’s not so much about what you learn, it’s the people you meet.”

“Quite. It’s a little late for a business call, though, isn’t it, father?”

Masaomi shrugged, unbothered. “Most of his business school classes are in the evening, so it was the only time in his schedule.”

The mystery would only gnaw at his mind and distract him from a good night’s sleep. “What did you and Midorima talk about?”

Masaomi put out his cigarette and folded up the newspaper he had been reading into neat rectangles to place onto the coffee table. “For now, that’s a private matter. You should go to sleep soon, Seijuro. You might not have an early morning class, but having enough rest is important for sound judgements.” Without hired help to help select his outfits for the office, Masaomi had taken great joy in picking out his crisp shirts and ties before he went to bed. Somehow, it had never dawned on him just how many cufflinks and patterns he owned and it chuffed him to no end the combinations he could make. He left his son to ponder things alone.

[=]

“I’m so happy we can hang out like this,” Kise gushed. He drank loudly from his pitch black Americano, the metal bangles around his wrist clattering. “I love it when I have shoots on the East Side. I really ought to move to a place over here, but you know...my parents want me around. They’re super paranoid. You know about the celebrities that get stabbed or whatever because they’ve got obsessive fans. They say that now that I’m moving away from tween and teenage fashion magazines to more high-end brands, there’ll be some crazy girls who get it in their heads that they’ve got to get at me now before I’m unaccessible. Really! Don’t they know how easy it is to follow someone on Instagram? Anyway, it just makes these meet-ups even better! I love seeing you outside of our monthly gatherings.”

Akashi smiled wanly. “The feeling is mutual, Kise. I’m only sorry that Aomine had an emergency shift and couldn’t come with us.”

“I texted you today, not him!” Kise slurped another loud gulp from his coffee. He might think him clairvoyant, but the reality was Akashi had seen the text on Kise’s phone when the boy went to fetch their coffees at the counter and Kise was so unguarded that he had not limited message previews. It was any miracle that the two of them thought their trysts were a secret. “Anyway, I got chewed out by him, speaking of which...I apologized to Midorima for airing out his family drama in public, but I think he’s still mad at me...it’s not my fault my brain makes me talk before I think! I know it’s been like...a week...but I just want to make sure he’s not holding a grudge against me. Do you know if he’s still mad?”

“How would I know? I don’t see him every day.”

“Aww, I thought you guys were super close! I mean, you guys were attached at the hip in middle school that we thought you two were definitely--uh, well, I guess if Kuroko said he’s not mad, then he’s not mad.” Kise began texting, distracted.

“I didn’t know he and Kuroko were close.”

“Oh, yeah, right? Like, you’d think that Midorima was the type that if he was in the same group as you, he’d pretend he didn’t know you or something. Kuroko and Aomine, that’s a friendship that makes sense. If anything, they shit-talk Kagami since he’s not in Japan to defend himself! But yeah, apparently he and Kuroko are in some kind of reading club...book club...something like that together. I thought Kuroko didn’t really like him, but they talk about literature or whatever.”

“So what did you all say about me and Midorima in middle school?”

Kise’s fingers stopped moving across his phone’s screen. He looked up, shamed at being caught after lowering his guard and thinking that his slip had gone unnoticed. “Uh...okay, it was years ago. You can’t blame us! And....uh, I don’t remember who started it but...we thought you two were an item or something! You guys were so close and always talking and going off together...I think even a rock or something dumb would have thought something about it.”

Akashi drank from his coffee too fast, the sound too loud against his ears and he cleared his throat to rid the burning sensation. That would smart for a few hours. Kise was staring at him now. “An item...the team thought we were dating?”

“At least! I said at least one of you would think just fooling around was improper or...something like that. I think Aomine said that? I just agreed with him-yeah, I think that’s what he said.”

“We were not dating.”

“I mean, duh! Of course not. That’s hilarious. That would be as wild as saying me and Aomine were dating just because we get along and hang out on the weekends. I mean, could you believe?” Kise laughed. “Anyway, more importantly...he’s doing okay, right? He brushed it off but...I mean, you guys go to private schools. That can’t be cheap.”

“I believe he’s got some kind of funding from the school; a scholarship, I think it was.”

“Oh yeah. Like Murasakibara, huh? Culinary school’s got to be super expensive too since it’s so specialized, but I bet Momoi is eating like a goddess! But I guess Midorima could get a job too, if he doesn’t already have one already. But...he was supposed to work at his parents’ company after he graduated, right? Now what? It’s a little late in the job hunting season, isn’t it? Aomine was saying he was looking since last year. So that’s why I was worried for Midorima! I mean, I couldn’t see him working in retail or at a fast food joint or...well...you know. The oldest profession…”

“Farming?” Akashi asked.

“No!” Kise looked around before lowering his voice. “Prostitution!”

Akashi was completely still before bursting out in laughter. “Please don’t say things like that, Kise. You know I’m terrible with jokes. Prostitution is illegal in Japan. I don’t think Midorima would do anything like breaking the law, even to make a living. He’s too ethical for that.”

“Okay, sure, maybe he isn’t selling his body on the corner. But there are other forms of sex work too. He could probably get a sugar daddy. His weird quirks might be endearing to some old dude. He might not be religiously devoted to astrology anymore, but I feel like people of a certain age in Japan like youths who are orderly and remind them of the Heian period or something. Right?”

“A sugar daddy...Kise, how many older men with money to spend on twenty-somethings exist in Japan? Do you think it’s so easy to just find someone who wants to sponsor someone without even a college degree?”

“You’re not taking me seriously.” Kise puffed out his cheeks, but he deflated and shrugged. “You’re right, though. I can’t imagine Midorima charming up a rich old guy anyway. He’d much sooner get a job checking each grain of rice for quality assurance at a grocery store before he’d say any flirty words to anyone.”

On the way home, Akashi thought back to Kise’s sugar daddy conspiracy. He was tired if he was entertaining such frivolous things like that...but paid dating was not something totally unusual in this day and age. There was a girl in his seminar who was known to be an escort to fancy events. He’d known about these sort of businesses; after his mother had died, his father had dreaded the sympathetic gazes of his peers and had hired a few women to hang off his arm to give an air of normalcy. His father had never touched these women beyond what was necessary, and one of them had even given Akashi chocolate. Midorima as a host was also an amazing thought; tugging on an itchy collar of a gaudy suit, speaking flowery language - the thought made Akashi laugh.

As he was taking his shoes off, Akashi noticed another pair of shoes at the step. On his way to his room, he ran into his father and Midorima coming from the direction of his father’s personal office.

“Seijuro,” Masaomi said, beaming. “I was just about to offer some peaches to Midorima; you know, the ones your grandmother sent. Go and cut some up now; I want to take a step out and take a call quickly.” He had a lighter in one hand and his cell phone in the other. Midorima nodded as Akashi.

“Of course, father.” Midorima followed him to the kitchen and sat at the table as Akashi washed two peaches and brought a knife over from the drawer. “Again, you’re here completely unannounced. You’ve got tell me when you’re paying us a visit.”

“Not completely unannounced. I had an appointment with your father.” Akashi started to peel a peach and Midorima stopped him. “There’s no need to do that. I don’t mind peach skin.” He took the fruit from Akashi’s hand, rubbed a spot, and bit in, his teeth breaking the delicate papery peel. The juice made his mouth wet, his lips the same shade as the hue of pink against his chin.

How many men in Japan existed rich enough to be a young, twenty-something’s patron? Akashi Masaomi was one of the country’s top businessmen, and he was a single, eligible bachelor.

“Midorima,” Akashi blurted. “Are you...free? On Fridays? It’s been forever and a day that we’ve played a game of shogi. We used to do that so often during...during middle school.”

Midorima licked his lips and reached for a napkin from the holder at the end of the table. “I have seminar until seven. But I am free most Fridays, if that’s what you’re asking. Are you suggesting we meet up to play shogi?”

Somehow he felt like he had lost control of the conversation. A whole childhood of learning composure and steering negotiations, and his father would be so disappointed. “Things are changing so much nowadays; we’ll be graduating soon and all. Isn’t it-isn’t it comforting to do things that are familiar, that remind you of a simpler time?” He was turning red, he could feel the heat in his face. He hoped his father’s phone call was taking its sweet time.

Midorima finished sucking the juice from the peach pit and put it on his damp napkin. “It has been a while since I’ve played,” he said finally. “And I’m sure university has taken up much of your time as well...perhaps I’ll find a victory in my lap. Okay, let’s do it.”

[=]

Two sessions of shogi later, and Akashi thought he had perfected his poker face. It had made his stomach turn, knots and somersaults at first at the idea that Midorima was in a sugar baby situation with his father. They were discreet; he no longer stumbled upon Midorima at his house, but after a second time of being caught, he was certain his father decided to change locations. All for the better - out of sight, out of mind. Akashi nodded to himself, flipping through a human resources reference book to pass the time and occupy his hands. This was a convenient bookstore near the little coffee nook Midorima had proposed for their shogi get-togethers. Anyway, whatever Midorima did in his own time was his own business; hadn’t he said before that his personal problems were not of his concern? They might have been friends once, close friends in middle school, but that was only the reality of adulthood. At a certain point, one became autonomous, living independently of one’s peers. After all, it wasn’t like Midorima was on a fast track to becoming his other dad or something ludicrous like that. Surely, if Midorima was interested in romance or something like that, he could easily pursue it.

Confident in his conclusions, Akashi placed the book back on the shelf. It was almost time for Midorima to arrive, and he wanted to take some moments to plan out his strategy. Midorima played a little differently than he did in middle school, still cautious, but more daring and willing to make sacrifices. Akashi did not play as often, that was true, but he still perused how the professionals played in public games. As he made his way to the door, passing the cashier counter, he spotted Midorima with Kuroko, standing shoulder to shoulder in front of a pile of books.

“There is no way I’m going to be able to carry all these,” Kuroko was saying, frowning slightly. “Of all days for one of the straps of my bag to break...I hate carrying books on the train...but I’m afraid that if I don’t buy them now, I’ll have to wait a few weeks for new copies to come in…”

“Don’t be so obtuse. You know you’ll see me later tonight; let me take some of your books. You just need to ask.”

“So...shall I wrap all these up?” the cashier asked slowly.

“You are a godsend, Midorima,” Kuroko said.

“As usual, I’m picking up after you.” Midorima began taking the books out of Kuroko’s hand, his hands closing over the shorter boy’s knuckles.

“Midorima,” Akashi called, walking over. “So you were here already. What a coincidence.”

Kuroko turned and looked at him. “Oh. You were meeting Akashi today?”

“Yes, but don’t worry. I won’t be late.”

“That’s a lot of books,” Akashi commented. He was speaking unfiltered, everything that came into his mind. What a mundane observation to make! Kuroko watched as Midorima placed the majority of books in his bag. “Are you sure you’ll be alright? Carrying all of those around, with me and after we’re done.”

“It’s honestly not a problem,” Midorima said. “I’ll see you tonight then, Kuroko.”

“Sure. Good to see you, Akashi.” Without another word or glance behind, Kuroko left the bookstore.

Midorima grunted, sliding his bag into the booth in the back of the coffee shop. They had more or less established the back area as their Friday haunt, quiet enough to hear themselves think. There were less of the cutesy little planters and light fixtures, so the younger crowd preferred to remain in the front. “I’m sorry, Akashi. I might need to leave early to drop off my things and take these books to Kuroko. I really can’t be late; I’ve been late for our meetings the past two times and it’s not looking good on my image.”

“Not a problem,” Akashi echoed. He laid out the shogi pieces on the board, the snap of the wood on wood making his hair stand on end. “Twenty-thousand.”

Midorima blinked at him. “Twenty-thousand...what?”

“Yen. I’ll give you twenty-thousand yen for this meeting. And...oh, it’s been two times since we’ve met before too, right? I’ll pay retroactively too.”

Midorima began shaking his head slowly. “Akashi...what’s this about? What are you talking about? Why are you bringing this up?” When Akashi didn’t respond, he blew out a breath. “Look...I know all of you are walking on eggshells about my family’s company...but honestly, I think it was the right time. My father’s told me much of the company’s strategy and our outlook for the next few years, and in my opinion, it was time for us to move on. We were outgrowing the market and it was time for an upgrade. I hardly think my father will retire now and live out the rest of his days in our living room. He’s already looking at our next venture...and I thank you all for your concerns, but I’m doing fine myself. I should have told you before, but I’ve secured a position and I’ll be set by graduation…”

“How can you call it that? This is what I mean. I can give you what my father’s been giving you, so you don’t need to do that. You don’t need to have that keep you from spending time with Kuroko, if he’s who you want. If it’s money, I’ve got more than enough of it.”

“Akashi, I don’t need or want your money.”

“Then how can I keep you spending time with me? What do I have to do to have you look at me?” This was embarrassing, and it was his saving grace that the coffee shop played a variety of music, loudly, that had irritated him the first time they had come. He couldn’t bear to look Midorima in the eyes. He was burning the lines of the shogi board into his eyes.

Midorima was silent across the table. “You don’t need to give me money for me to want to spend time with you, Akashi.” He reached over, coming short of touching Akashi on the arm, setting his hand across the table. “You’re seriously confusing me. What on earth are you talking about? What’s this about your father? I told him not to tell you about me taking a job with your company. I wanted to show him that I’m capable and I’ve earned this degree without you putting in a good word for me, like I know you’d feel compelled to do. I thought he was pleased by my performance on his practice cases. Did you say something to him?”

Akashi heard all this, understood it, and processed it, but he opened his mouth and said, “But you’re my father’s sugar baby.”

There was another long silence. “Sugar baby?” Midorima withdrew his hand and brought it to his face. “Who gave you that idea? You really thought all this time I’ve been...sleeping with your father?”

“Then...you’re not sleeping with Kuroko either?”

In spite of himself, Midorima laughed. “Kuroko? No, I’m not. We’re in a Reading Group together. We usually meet Saturdays and the girl in charge wants to do an early morning session to match an early morning meditation scene in the book we’ve read. We’re meeting in a park closest to Kuroko’s place, so I was planning on sleeping over so we could head over tomorrow morning. And I was planning on just sleeping on his couch, nothing else.” Another short laugh left his lips. “I’m sorry, but the reality isn’t as exciting as in your simulations. I suppose you’re right that things really are changing as we’re getting older that you didn’t immediately come to me with your thoughts and speak your mind the moment you suspected something.”

Akashi began sweeping the shogi pieces back in the travel container. “I just remembered - something’s come up, I’m afraid I must be going.”

But Midorima reached out again and grasped his wrist, gently without pressure. “Wait.” His hand was hot, heat that his father did not know and that Kuroko did not know either. “As fantastical as half of that was...was that a confession? Do you want me to spend more time with you, even without the excuse of shogi? We’ve both been busy for graduation - but things will be different once we’re working.”

Agreeing would be too much of a direct concession. “The others have been thinking there was something going on between us since middle school.”

Midorima’s hand squeezed. “Then we can put some truth to those speculations.”

#akamido #akashi seijuro #midorima shintarou #kuroko no basket #kuroko no basuke #canadino fic #did i really quote sh*ngela in a fic that isn't even half humorous?#yes because that is who i am as a person

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