#okay yes i am late but honestly who cares the important thing is. that i posted another sanuso fic | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

kzuhasgf · 10 months

Text

in between the lines

pairing — lily morrow x 7th member!reader

you and lily are THE chaotic besties. you can't be seen without each other and are like peas in a pod. what happens when there's a realization?

tags — f!reader (ethnicity friendly), idol!au genre — crack, fluff, ROMANCE (this is sickeningly sweet) word count — 4,840

notes — there's two curse words, reader is ’03 and knows how to cook, I had FUN with this one (I hope you enjoy it too), I WON'T SAY ANY SPOILERS!!

when you became a trainee at jyp, things were fun and exciting, meeting people like you, taking up new experiences, and working hard to fulfill your dream of becoming one of the most talented idols.

of course, that was all enjoyment at first.

trainee life is tiring and excruciating. for one, it takes a lot of time and effort. most of the time, years. it's your top priority to improve, so you must manage training, studying, eating, socializing, sleeping, and taking care of yourself all at once.

sometimes, it was too overwhelming for you.

that is because you had to do all of that, and there was always something to worry about. one second, you would rejoice about passing your monthly evaluation and then hear that your vocals aren't half as good as others who have been here.

when you ace that one challenging choreography your coach assigned to you, yet still compared to one of your seniors.

trainee life was tiring, demeaning, and excruciating.

not until you met lily.

you still remember the first time you saw her, walking into the wrong practice room.

realizing you were in the wrong room, you bowed and apologized profusely, her warmly saying that it was okay and there was nothing to worry about.

the second you made eye contact, something sparked, and that was something you could never describe.

you hadn't interacted with her that much, her being in the more skilled classes of the trainee groups. she was very well known and had been there before you by a long run, so finally seeing her in person made you curious.

"I'm sorry, excuse me,"

"but you're lily, right? I've heard a lot about you."

"oh!" she looked at you wide-eyed, "yes, I am lily. and only good things, I hope." she chuckled nervously, and you gave her a reassuring smile.

"of course. it's all good things,"

you checked your watch and frowned after seeing the minutes that passed. you had practice to get to and didn't want to get scolded by your teacher, so you couldn't stay for so long.

"I'm sorry to cut our conversation short, but I have to go. it's nice to meet you, I hope to see you again!"

"it's okay! see you wherever!" she smiled, and when you left, her eyes stayed on where your figure was far too long than she expected.

and guess what? "see you wherever," you did.

at least the second time you met.

this time, she stumbled upon you alone, in another practice room, at ten pm, on the floor.

you didn't hear her enter, so you lay there, unaware she was in the room. she recognized you by your appearance and by your previous interaction with her. by now, she had forgotten whatever she was planning and instead looked at you in concern.

"are you okay?" you opened your eyes, startled to see her doe ones stare at you from above.

you screamed, "aah!! oh. lily? hey, lily!"

"oh my god! don't scream like that again. it made me scream, too!" she put her hand on her chest.

"I'm sorry!" you said, getting up, your eyes widening as you saw her more clearly now and not be shadowed by herself.

"oh my god, lily."

"why? what's wrong?"

she looked gorgeous.

"wait, why are you even here? it's late, you shouldn't be practicing!" she asked and scolded you, her arms crossed and her eyebrows furrowed.

"oh, don't worry, I wasn't training. I was only lying on the floor, questioning things in my life," you answered her honestly, catching her off guard.

"oh. then, what were you thinking about?"

"hmm... well, I was thinking of important things to ones that weren't. like how my family is doing, if I'm good enough to be an idol, what song I should listen to before I sleep, or what I should eat tomorrow. all random stuff." you shrugged your shoulders, spacing out and looking at a wall.

"hey, what is this that I'm hearing?!"

you looked at her in surprise.

"you're good enough to be an idol. more than enough, actually. I even heard from other trainees that you're our new ace. that's not something you hear every day! I got interested in you."

your eyes lit up visibly.

"oh, wait, really? you got interested in me too?"

"too?" she questioned you.

"I, wait—"

"it's okay, y/n." she laughed, throwing her head back, smiling up to her eyes. your heart raced.

"you're so cute."

you can't stop yourself from staring.

"what you said a while ago about not knowing what song you wanted to listen to at night,"

she added, "I have a few songs in mind. do you want me to play it for you?" after nodding, she quickly walked to where the TV was, searching on youtube and playing an upbeat song.

she walked back to you with her brow raised, and she gave you a small smile, reaching her hand out to you.

you thought, if she looked this good with a messy bun and baggy clothes, how would she look when dressed up flawlessly?

"do you wanna sing for a bit? it's nothing intense, only a couple of songs."

your lips parted, eager to give her an answer—

"and, maybe after, I can show you some of the snacks I eat at the cafeteria."

your whole world stopped.

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you and lily couldn't ever seem to be apart.

after that night, you both became closer. in some way, it was inevitable. you two just seemed to match each other so well.

it was routine for both of you to eat meals together, practice together, hang out and go places, and be at each other's dorms.

you both were best friends.

the best of friends.

chaotic ones, at that.

she brightened up your days the same way you did with hers. when you needed a should to cry on, she was always there, and you did the same for her, too.

lily always managed to bring you up on your worst days.

you often didn't think when she was around. it was as if your mind went blank, and all you could think about was her. you didn't care what other people thought as long as you both had fun.

you both did what your hearts desired, regardless of who or what was there.

that explains why you were so chaotic together.

so when you two were announced to be part of the pre-debut lineup and upcoming group of jyp, you both screamed and jumped in happiness.

hearing the news along with the other girls of jypn, you turned to her and screamed, holding her hands in joy.

"OH MY GOD!! OH MY GOD, LILY, WE DID IT. WE MADE IT!!" screaming, you started hugging her, jumping.

still in shock, lily gave you the biggest smile she could muster and started screaming and jumping with you, holding your hands tighter.

"OH MY GOD, Y/N, YES, WE DID IT!"

the announcer looked at you both questioningly while the girls could only look away in embarrassment.

"don't mind them, please." haewon smiled at them apologetically.

"o...kay. alright then. that's all for today, thank you. and congratulations. you may celebrate." they said and quickly left.

you and lily were so occupied that it took you a minute before noticing the announcer was gone. you both started giggling and pointing at each other, leaving the others confused. bae couldn't handle your weirdness and called you two out.

"just to let you guys know, you're both freaks." haewon burst out in laughter, clutching her stomach. you poked your tongue out at her, and lily doubled up in laughter.

"it's okay, lily. they're just jealous of our super glue-bonded relationship."

"super glue-bonded?!" lily exclaimed and looked at you with wide eyes, and you laughed heartily, bringing her closer and patting her back.

"you guys are so entertaining." kyujin stared at you both in astonishment.

"okay now, don't even try looking at them." haewon covered kyujin's eyes, turning her away and making her whine.

"why, unnie?!"

"I'm doing this to protect you!"

you scoffed and crossed your arms as you looked at her, fake disgust. "what an asshole, honestly," you said quietly enough, only for lily to hear. you shook your head as your best friend snorted and covered her mouth, trying to hide her laughter.

you grinned widely, proud.

you loved adored seeing her this happy.

"trying to hide her laughter," but ultimately failing.

but you didn't mind. as long as you got to see your best friend like this.

"she... she called you an asshole!"

your jaw fell in surprise.

"LILY—?!"

okay, maybe you did mind.

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nmixx had been around for more than a year now, and you were all playing a folk tale mafia game, trying to find who the nine-tailed fox was.

the goal of this game was actually the least of your worries. you were trying to distract yourself from what close proximity you had with lily.

and you rather eat high-quality food than focus on what's happening (except for the girl you were beside).

everyone started telling their roles, and you lightly smiled when it was lily's turn.

"I'm... a subject.

"what?" you mumbled to her in surprise, your mouth full of food.

"hey, don't eat with your mouth full," she frowned and when you finished chewing, she took a tissue and wiped your mouth, leaning closer to you.

"I— thank you," you said quietly, looking down.

your heart ached. and you didn't know if it was in a good or bad way.

"yah, you're the only one who hasn't said anything about your role yet," haewon said.

"yeah, and she's being super quiet. that isn't normal!" jiwoo pointed at you in accusation.

"hey, what the fuck? I haven't even checked my bowl yet!" you threw your arms out in exasperation.

"language," haewon said and looked at you pointedly.

"sorry." you apologized quickly.

"oh my god, unnie, are you that hungry? your bowl's almost half finished!" jiwoo laughed, smacking jinni on the back, who groaned, and you huffed, pouting in response.

"or maybe the food's just that good," lily countered, crossing her arms and looking at jiwoo.

"oh, aren't you so cute?" lily cooed and squished your cheeks, your pout instantly fading away.

"thank you, lily," you said with a small smile, chuckling and holding her hand on your cheek.

she did nothing but look at you with wide eyes.

after your leader's nagging, you finally relented, moving the rice left in your bowl aside, eyebrows raising at the role given to you.

"I'm... a doctor."

"what?!" the maknae almost screamed in surprise.

"y/n!! you're not supposed to say that!" lily panickedly waved her arms at you.

"oh, huh?" you said dumbfoundedly, and the girls began laughing. you, scratching the back of your neck, decided to join along.

you lied. you weren't a doctor, just a regular citizen.

but, you thought, if you tricked them into killing you, you could watch the game as an observer (not to tell lily answers) and eat as much food as you wanted. the plan was good in your eyes!

adding to that, you were also... decent in acting.

and so, the plan commenced.

the nine-tailed fox was now going to choose who to kill.

everyone closed their eyes, and after waiting, it was revealed...

that you were chosen to be killed.

"I'M A CITIZEN!! GET TRICKED, IDIOTS," you yelled, clapping and laughing at everyone. the staff began laughing, finding it amusing.

the girls could only stare in disbelief as you grabbed your bowl and showed them you were a citizen.

"boo hoo, you killed an innocent!"

you smiled happily and got a spoon, taking food out of the pan.

"y/n... did you really just," lily looked at you expectantly, already knowing what you did.

"shh, lily, they don't need to know." you whispered and winked at her, putting your finger on her lips, her mouth dropping in shock.

she's blushing.

"you know, unnie, if you're killed, you can't eat the food." bae teased, poking your side.

"okay." you shrugged, continuing to eat.

you blinked.

"WAIT, WHAT?!"

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you and the girls were preparing for your "love me like this" comeback, filming different takes for your stage practice.

everything seemed to be in order. you all were singing perfectly and managed to perform flawlessly. it was the same with your dance moves and stage presence.

it only took three hours because haewon wanted you all to ace it.

when everyone decided to rest, you drank water and lay on the floor, eyes closing.

you were exhausted, but you had fun. you often made faces when you weren't seen on camera, making the girls enjoy, too. you sat up, and from where you were, you could see them talking to each other, off in their own worlds.

except for lily.

she sat alone, hugging herself and resting her chin on her knees. you were concerned as you watched her, wondering what was wrong.

lily has been upset since yesterday morning. when you asked her, she didn't explain why and refused to tell you, not looking you in the eye.

even hugging her or holding her hand didn't work, which shocked you.

after your futile attempts, you decided to leave her be, telling her you were there for her whenever she needed you.

you thought you could both hang out and do things together as usual, but you guess she thought otherwise.

cause every time you approached her, she just walked away.

and that puzzled you to no end.

you didn't mind her not telling you what upset her because you wanted her to share it when she was ready. but her not even looking at you and walking in the opposite direction of where you were?

it made you think something went terribly wrong.

you stood up and went to her, an anxious look on your face. you really hoped she wouldn't walk away this time.

but, unfortunately for you, she noticed you walking toward her, and she quickly excused herself to the bathroom, her head down, shadowing her face.

you didn't even get the chance to get a word out.

haewon, who was nearby, looked at her worriedly, gathering her stuff before running out.

you could only look at her walking away, disheartened.

your members also knew something was up. they noticed lily's behavior and tried investigating it themselves but ended up with nothing. being the closest person to her, they had to ask you what was going on.

"I don't know, jinsol, I really don't know. she isn't telling me anything, and I'm just as left in the dark as you are."

bae looked at you in surprise. "oh? you don't know why?"

she recomposed herself, "all right. it's okay, unnie. thank you for helping. we hope lily unnie feels better soon."

you agreed, and after she walked back to jiwoo and kyujin, you slumped in your seat, frowning and sighing, feeling more lost than ever.

her reaction didn't help either.

the last time you couldn't talk to her for this long was when she had to return to her family for an emergency.

you didn't know what to do. you felt weird, and strangely enough, it felt empty without lily.

you didn't want to assume, but it seemed like she was avoiding you.

you weighed out the possibilities, and she might need some space, but she seemed to get along with everyone else just fine.

she even tried helping with the laundry last night but settled for washing the dishes instead.

she even went to haewon's room last night.

wait, she... went to haewon's room last night?

you couldn't linger in your thoughts any longer since someone sat beside you unexpectedly.

"…yoona?"

"y/n, I need to ask you something."

you and yoona were particularly close, so you didn't mind when she didn't use formalities. but because you were always with Lily, you never got to be as close to her as you had hoped.

"sure, yoona, what is it?"

"are you sure that lily unnie hasn't told you anything? like seriously, anything?"

you looked at her curiously. "well, from what I can recall, no. but I told her I would be there for her no matter what."

"hmm, okay. did you know that haewon unnie knows why lily unnie's acting this way?"

"wait, what?"

"mhm. I asked her, but she said it wasn't her place to say. I just wanted to let you know."

your stomach dropped.

"oh… okay. that's alright. thanks, yoona."

she nodded and hugged you, before walking away.

you sat there for god knows how long.

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"unnie!"

when you noticed the youngest leaning over to you, interested in what you were boiling, you turned like a deer caught in headlights. you sighed in relief when you realized the knife wasn't close to your fingers.

"kyu, you almost made me cut my finger."

her smile faded, and she quickly apologized. she started pouting, feeling bad.

"it's okay, baby. nothing happened, see?"

"still, I'm sorry!"

the urge to baby her was powerful. she'd probably whine over it, though.

even if you wanted to, you couldn't. you were chopping vegetables because it was your turn to cook dinner tonight.

whenever you did, kyujin had a habit of watching you because you were the only one in the group who knew how to cook meals, unlike the others who only knew how to cook ramen and eggs.

"what are you making, unnie?" she tilted her head, looking up at you.

you chuckled, "ah, well, I'm making sundubu-jjigae."

"ooh, don't make it too spicy, please!"

"of course! how cute our maknae is~"

you ended up babying her, anyways.

since kyujin didn't know how to cook, like the rest of nmixx, she ended up sitting on the couch and playing games on her phone. you wiped your hands and leaned against the counter, checking the time on your watch. it was past seven pm.

dinner would take about an hour to be ready, so all you had to do was wait. you and the girls wanted to sleep before nine o'clock because you had a performance at music bank the next day.

you looked up when you heard someone clear their throat near you. you felt a pang of fear when you saw that it was lily.

"lily."

you tried to hide your nervousness by leaning even more against the counter. lily appeared to feel the same way as she averted her gaze and fidgeted with her fingers.

kyujin, seeing the situation firsthand, had her jaw dropped as she walked away from the couch, making sure you noticed before hiding in the hallway to listen in on your conversation.

the awkward silence was deafening. you eventually relaxed and stared directly at lily. her eyes were filled with conflict. it's not unusual to see her acting this way cause it's something you've seen a million times.

you were just nervous and scared because you believed she was acting this way because of something you did.

"lily... how are you doing? are you okay?"

you said softly, giving her a welcoming smile. you glanced down and noticed her palms were sweaty from how she was repeatedly wiping her hands on her pajamas.

you raised your brow and looked at her, seeing her biting her bottom lip.

"I— y/n. can I talk to you?"

"we're talking, aren't we?"

"please."

she closed her eyes and took deep breaths in and out, putting her hand on her chest. you showed visible concern. lily was rarely ever this serious. you approached her and gently took her hand in yours.

"lily, what's wrong? I'm here to listen, please."

she stared into your eyes, and you could feel her trembling. she turned her head and covered her face, her other hand still holding yours.

"lily..."

"y/n, you know you're my best friend, right?" you hummed in response. She slowly turned back to you with pink cheeks.

"I tell you almost everything. anything and everything,"

she broke eye contact again, preferring to stare at the fridge rather than look into your eyes, swirling with emotion.

"but that's exactly why I couldn't tell you this."

"I'm sorry for not hanging out or talking to you like we always do. I just needed time to... process how I was feeling."

you nodded, listening to her intently.

"go ahead, lily."

she breathed in once more before letting the truth come out.

"look, y/n, I always thought of you as a best friend and best friend only.

"that is until I rambled to haewon about you, and she thought I had a big big crush on you."

"and that made me feel weird for days."

so that's why she wasn't talking to me?

"...I only started showing it when I saw you hanging out with yoona."

oh.

"wait, what?"

"let me explain!"

she stepped closer, awkwardly holding your arms in an attempt to be firm.

"you always stayed by my side, and me only. it's weird, y/n. no, not that! I mean, um, how I feel about it." she said and whispered, "and how I feel with the things you do."

you cocked your head like a confused puppy.

"awe shit, I didn't hear that."

"what are you doing?" haewon walked over to kyujin with her eyebrows furrowed, hands on her hips after hearing the maknae curse.

"has y/n really been teaching you how to curse? I'm so! going to scold her—" she said almost too loudly, making kyujin panic.

"quiet, unnie! look."

she peeked her head out of the doorway, eyes widening when she saw you and lily close together.

"okay, y/n, I know this is already a mess, but please hear me out."

"when you hold or hug me, I feel so— I don't know. like my whole body goes warm. I can never stop it."

"when you grab my hand or do that little thing where you caress it when I'm nervous, I—I feel like I'm gonna explode!"

"when I feel insecure, and you compliment me to make me feel better, I feel like the only girl you see in this world."

"and that terrifies me, y/n. because you're... my best friend. I shouldn't be feeling this way for you."

"but I can't help it. I really can't help it."

"especially when I saw you and yoona being so close together."

"I didn't take lily unnie to be the jealous type," bae said.

"when did you get here?!" haewon exclaimed, startled.

"it made my entire being feel like I was being soaked underwater, and I couldn't breathe. if, if that even makes sense..."

"it does, don't worry." you reassured her.

"but it also felt like it was... burning? Like I was burning."

"when I talked to haewon about you, I felt so conflicted. I thought, why would I ever have a crush on you? you're y/n."

ouch.

"but then, I realized you're also the y/n who's been there for me through thick and thin. the y/n who makes me smile effortlessly and wipes my tears away whenever I'm being extra emotional on a difficult day."

"the one who never judges me and has stuck by my side even though I'm probably annoying to you."

"you're the y/n who fits me perfectly, and no matter what happens, every memory I have with you has been sweet, heartwarming, and happy."

"looking back at the past and what we've been through together over the years has changed the way I look at you, and it makes me feel... I'm not sure how to describe it."

she pondered in thought, and her expression lit up.

"hey, remember when the netizens bashed me for being too honest on a live and how I should just keep my mouth shut?"

"you were so angry when the management team couldn't do anything about it that you wanted to personally go to the jyp building and confront them there."

"ugh, yes, I remember that," you groaned and covered your face with your hands in embarrassment while she chuckled and grabbed them away.

"I don't think anyone would have stopped you if haewon didn't drag you to your room." she whispered and teased, staring at you in amusement as you nodded her off, grumbling about the incident.

"I was even willing to riot online... bastards." you mumbled.

"what was that?"

"it's nothing!"

she giggled at your words, "oh, you're so silly."

"y/n, you made me realize you're not just my best friend. you're something else to me, something so much more, and something friends shouldn't ever feel for each other."

"and I resented myself for quite a while. until I realized it wasn't wrong, I was only scared of ruining our friendship."

"so, that's why I'm here to declare it. I'm going to say it, y/n. are you ready? tell me you're ready." her voice echoed throughout the kitchen and living room, and you laughed at her antics.

"lily..." you shook your head, heart beating faster. you gestured to her in encouragement. "I'm ready."

she held your hands and smiled at you wholeheartedly.

"I like you, y/n. I like you so much."

"oh my god!! she did it!"

"she actually said it?!"

"lily... I."

she leaned forward, eyes sparkling with hope.

"you...?"

"I—..."

"I..."

"..."

"...?"

"hey, wait, you're doing this on purpose!!"

when she saw you laughing again, her expression fell, making her pout and whine, looking at you disgruntled.

"I'm being serious here! do you like me, or do you not—"

you cut her off, "god, you're so cute,"

she blushed, her eyes widening, and her face fired up to different shades of red, quite flustered.

you moved closer, your gaze locked on hers. you placed your hands on lily's waist, causing her to freeze, unsure of what to do.

you smiled and grabbed her hands, putting them on your shoulders.

"there we go."

she stared up at you, looking at you with trustful eyes.

"lily, may I kiss you?"

"I—..." she stared at you in surprise. "yes. you may kiss me, y/n."

you tilted your head, glancing at her lips to her eyes. she tried shying away, but you laughed and stopped teasing, softly kissing her lips.

it was innocent and sweet. you could sense lily's nerves as she stood stiffly. you eased her by moving your mouth against hers.

she melted into the kiss, her hands clasped around your neck. you pulled her closer than before, your hands now grasping her lower back, and you completely surrendered yourself to her, the woman who had you from the start, lily.

you caressed her sides, making her squirm and squeal. you chuckled as you broke away from the kiss, seeing her amazed and stunned, standing there dumbfounded.

"oh, my god."

you both took deep breaths, your foreheads touching. lily took your breath away in many ways. she was so hypnotizing. everything about her managed to lure you in.

"y/n... that was... so... wow."

"wow. wow, indeed."

every. single. time.

whether it was this kiss, a sleepover in her room, or another run to the convenience store in the middle of the night,

she always drew you in. always.

she giggled, staring at you adoringly.

"y/n... does that mean we're dating now? am I your girlfriend?"

you blinked and stared at her dumbly.

"lily... yes, you are my girlfriend."

if you could do a replay in real-time, you'd want it to replay this moment over and over.

the way she crashed into your body, hugging you tightly and squeezing you with all her might.

"thank you, y/n." she whispered into your neck.

the way your members cheered and ran out of the hallway, not caring to hide anymore.

the way you felt when you held her.

"of course, lily." I might even love you.

the way you felt, at that moment, when your long-time best friend and the love of your life loved you the same.

your heart ached.

and, in between the lines, you knew it was in a good way.

"...y/n, am I a good kisser?"

"oh, come on, lily."

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bonus!

"Hey, so you and Lily unnie, huh?"

you stared at your phone in shock, not expecting a notification from jinni late at night.

"yunjin? how are you? how did you know,"

she typed her message, and when she sent it, you scoffed in disbelief. but not so much in surprise.

"Yoona." "I expected it, honestly. I could see you two get together from a mile away!"

"she's still updating you a lot, I see?"

"Who else would be doing it? ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ"

you chuckled, typing a response back.

"i hope you two last long."

"You too, unnie."

"I miss you. tell her I miss her, too."

she added, "I guess Lily unnie as well..."

"don't let her see that." you laughed, already missing your former member.

"ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ"

"See you whenever I see you, unnie. I love you."

"i love you too."

see you, jinni.

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ending notes — I have roller coaster on repeat (also idk if that bashing thing actually happened I just made it up) I lowkey feel like I trashed this, PLS tell me what you think

#lily x reader #lily morrow x reader #lily imagines #nmixx x reader #nmixx fluff #nmixx imagines #lily #lily morrow #🍃kachi's works

253 notes · View notes

mrs-monaghan · 1 year

Note

I just watch Bon Voyage 1. And it gave me clarity on something. Jikook started being sexually active around 2016. Or maybe even before that. Why would you give someone a footsie under the table if you’re not sexually active with each other?

Damn anon. You're just gonna bring this up, no heads up? Okay then.

How do I answer this without getting crucified for delving into their sex lives? 🤔

Whatever. I'm already cancelled.

Disclaimer: this is just what I deduced. Only Jikook know what really transpired.

So due to certain behaviour I am inclined to believe that yes, by 2016 they had gone all the way. Maybe late 2015 (thus my theory for why 8/11/15 is important) or early 2016. Because 2015 we have the 2 things that I linked above, then 2016 we have; like you just pointed out, the crotch footsie and also Osaka Vlive. Oh! And let's not forget Jimin eating a sausage, saying he's a big eater, laughing at reasons only known to him, while looking at the person who was behind the camera. Possibly the owner of the sausage Jimin likes to eat. Idk 🤷🏽‍♀️

2016 was full of sexual tension and innuendos and just... things. I think we can all safely agree by 2016 the going was going. 👉🏽👌🏽

That being said, I think before the going started going, other things were being done way before that. I don't need to clarify obvs. Kissing, heavy petting.... c'mon I'm already saying too much don’t make me say it. O__L. Okay, there i said it.

But the thing is, there are Jikookers who have this thing where they say Jimin waited till 2017 in Tokyo or some shit or they didn't do anything at all before they went all the way. Again, because Jimin was trying to be respectful. Or because being gay is illegal in SK. Or a bunch of other stuff that I'm honestly not sure why they would apply.

Jimin is absolutely the type to feel guilty if he thought he made JK do something he didn't want to do. That much i agree on. But, that would come after the fact. Alright? Teenage boys are the same everywhere. Everywhere. The wind blows in their face too hard they get hard at that age. And now you want me to put my faith in two horny teenage boys, living under the same roof and are attracted to eo??? Nah fam.

I'm not doing that. Regret usually comes later, after the deed has already been done 😂😂

And if the accident was too good it happens again and again and again until you start planning for it and looking forward to it. Maybe by saying you'll be staying late practising the new choreo at the studio? 😌 who knows?

Moving on, we know for sure they had already shagged in 2016 because that is when the push and pull started to happen. This is the example I like to give. When you sleep with your teacher, or with your boss. Right? (By teacher I mean college, please and thank you) Do you know what happens when you fuck your superior? A little respect kind of goes out the window. Suddenly you don't care if you're late for work. You decide not to do your homework just because. Your behaviour changes because you know you can get away with shit now.

And this is exactly what happened with Jikook. Jinmin were reacting to that show JK went on and Jimin was lamenting how JK doesn't listen to him. He complained during the live... and he complained on twitter

He complained some more

And complained again

He was a dog with a bone, couldn't stop complaining

And that wasn't the only time. Eat Jin. That one live where Jikook were misbehaving with those lollypops. Jimin again complains that JK has changed. He doesn't listen to him anymore.

He was smiling... but mans was finding JK's behaviour baffling. He couldn't understand why JK had changed.

Jimin, you let that boy wreck you, he has seen how you look like pliant and at his mercy, begging for the Jungkonda. You did this to yourself. Like a friend said to me, Jimin had made his bed, and he now needed to learn how to lay in it and be comfortable. You chose to give that boy the jibooty, he ain't listening to u 😂

(Sidebar: JK replied "I take it from you" given the topic at hand you can't blame my mind for where it went 😂😂😂😂)

Anyway, it's okay, they worked it out and are now living happily ever after. 😁😁💛💜

So yes anon. By 2016 Jikook were Jikooking. Hard. Pun intended 😏

Bonus.

JK had no emotions....In anything.... Hmm 🤔

Does that sound to anyone else like JK was hitting and quitting or is it just me? Just me? Okay, I'll show myself out. My apologies.

#ask shaz #bts ask #bts #jikook #jimin and jungkook #jimin #jungkook #park jimin #jeon jeongkook #kookmin #minkook #jikook analysis #jikook theory #jikook theories #jikook sexy times #jikook bothered

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anxious-witch · 3 months

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This post specifically goes for my mutuals/followers who have been struggling lately. I see you and I don't always have something encouraging to reply, but if you have been feeling down recently, I hope this will help.

TW for mental health talk, mentions of suicide (this is an encouraging post, but please don't read further if anything of the sort might trigger you. Keeping your mental health intact is more important ❤️)

It's so very easy to get in the spiral of "I am not doing enough, all these people that I love would be better off without me". And convincing yourself those same people would forget you and move on quickly.

It's not true. I understand the sentiment, I really, really do. I used to fully believe that myself. But that's a lie. Mental illness reshapes the way we think and perceive things. And our brain and wired to remember bad things more than good ones. But when you'd write down everything that happened every day, I'd honestly be surprised if all of it was bad. Of course there are bad days, but even then, depression tend to focus on things you did wrong instead of those you did right.

But I am here to talk about the fact that I'd miss you if you were gone, too. Which seems ridiculous. "Rio, you follow 1000 blogs, you wouldn't notice". *loud incorrect buzzer* wrong! I would notice. As long as we ever interacted, as long as you liked and/or reblogged my posts, I'd notice.

When someone gets busy and I don't see them in my notes for over a week, I hope they are okay and just doing something more fun irl. I am not always great at remembering usernames, but as soon as they like one of my posts again I'm like yes!! They are back! I am glad you are okay!

"But I don't even contribute to the fandom!" No? Do you think creating content is the only way to contribute? Even just lurking and liking stuff counts. And I know some of you send really lovely anon messages that have made my day more than once. It DOES matter. Notes help other people as encouragement to keep posting. That absolutely counts.

"We barely post about the same fandom anymore" ah! But I still see you! I have a mutual that I have been following since 2016-2017, I believe. I have no idea what the hell he posts about these days. I can't rven accurately tell you why I originally followed him in the first place, it was either LOTR or Twilight, but fuck if I remember, because neither of hs posts about it!

And I still care. Because his journey ended up helping me. Seeing people's posts about their little achievements always makes my day. And even if you don't feel like you achieved anything in awhile, that doesn't mean you won't in the future. My point is, you are loved more than you know.

And this is only about online stuff. People notice when you walk down the street. Maybe someone likes your hair, or some detail of your outfit. Maybe someone saw you feed a stray and thought how nice you are. Maybe someone takes the same public transport as you every day and takes comfort in the fact you share the same path, if only for a few minutes.

This tumblr post perfectly described it, actually:

So please, if not for your own sake, for the sake of all the people who love you silently, keep going. It will get better. You might be just a bit further away from getting better. But you won't know unless you keep going.

So let's find out together, shall we?

#rio rambles #mental health #tw suicide mention #I think I might be getting way to ahead of myself #but I have seen posts and heard second hand about a lot of ppl struggling rn #so if this makes even one person feel a bit better it's worth posting

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cloudwhisper23 · 3 months

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We're moving right along, fam! Happy Grumbo Month! Thanks again to @grow-bettah for the prompts! (Had a bit of difficulty with this one, but I hope y'all enjoy it anyway!)

Day 8: Matching

Scar needed to borrow a suit. To look professional, he told Mumbo. He needed to look good, and since he and Mumbo were the same height, Mumbo was the best option to ask for help.

Mumbo was the best option to ask for help, honestly. He was very accustomed to wearing his suit, so it was only natural that Scar turned to him. Except, Scar wanted to borrow a suit. And Mumbo only had one.

He told Scar the issue, and Scar said it was no problem. Mumbo could borrow his clothes for a day.

So now, Mumbo was sitting on the floor holding his knees as Scar showed him different options. He was uncomfortable with all of them so far.

“Not to rag on your fashion sense, mate, but-“

“Do not finish that sentence, Mumbo.”

“Right.” Mumbo slouched, letting his legs finally stretch in front of him. “Do you have anything less over-the-top?”

“I do. I just figured that since your whole thing is…” Scar gestured at Mumbo. “Well, you’re always in the suit! I thought you’d want something fashionable.”

“Fashionable and over-the-top are not always the same thing, mate. But I think the word you meant was formal. And it’s not that I can’t be casual. I just like the suit better.”

“Okay. I know that, which is why I was trying to match to that.”

Mumbo shook his head. “It’s not quite the same thing.”

“So you want to try something more casual?”

“I may as well give it a shot,” Mumbo replied. “But don’t forget, Scar. I will need the suit back. I have a very important meeting tomorrow.”

“Yes, you need to be all professional for when you meet Grian. I know, I know.” Scar pulled out a green sweater. “How’s this?”

“Better.” Mumbo felt his shoulders sag with relief. “That will work, Scar.”

Later that day, Scar waited for Mumbo to return before giving him some bad news. “So, the meeting went poorly.”

“Okay.” Mumbo shifted slightly in the sweater. “Why are you wearing different clothes?”

Scar winced. “Well, when some people consider something to be terrible, they throw things. Things that make a mess and stain.”

“Oh, Scar!” Mumbo exclaimed. “What have you done?”

“I didn’t mean to, Mumbo! I’m sorry!”

“Now what am I supposed to wear tomorrow?” Mumbo buried his face in his hands. “I was meant to be making a good impression.”

“Well, I’ve done some research on this Grian guy, and I think a sweater would do just fine. That’s what he typically wears anyway.”

“I can’t just come in and steal the man’s style, Scar.”

“Well, it’s not stealing if it’s temporary. Besides, he’d probably see you as a fan, not a usurper. You already have the whole look with the mustache and the suit and everything. And he probably knows that too. It would be flattering!”

Mumbo sighed. “Fine then. What kind of sweater would you have me wear?”

Scar brightened. “I have just the one.”

Grian wasn’t sure how to feel about the fact that Mumbo Jumbo was running late. Honestly, he thought the time and location he’d sent had been clear enough. Apparently not.

The judges didn’t seem to mind that Grian’s competition was running late, but then again, Grian was used to this sort of thing. Maybe they’d try and start right when Mumbo Jumbo got here. It certainly seemed like something they would do.

His fingers twitched toward the Creative inventory. Grian was too on edge, and they needed to get started. Buildswap wasn’t the only thing Grian needed to work on today. Where is he?

Just when Grian was preparing to call it, Mumbo appeared next to him, blabbing apologies. Grian cut him off immediately. “Where have you been?”

“Fashion emergency?” Mumbo scratched his neck.

“You were panicking about what to wear? Mumbo Jumbo, this is a build battle. Who cares what you’re wearing? The judges certainly don’t.” Grian shook his head, finally looking at the other man. “And-“

He fell silent, even as the judges grinned at each other. Grian blinked, expecting the red sweater to change into something else. Literally anything other than what it was.

“I had to borrow some clothes-” Mumbo started.

“We match,” Grian cut him off again.

There was another painful pause. “It doesn’t matter. Let’s just get started.”

Mumbo nodded weakly, and the rest of the competition passed without incident. The conversation between them was somewhat stilted, but at the very least, the judges were able to help Grian warm up. This certainly was the man’s element, Mumbo noticed.

When Grian gave him a contact card to plan another session, Mumbo was just grateful that he was getting another chance. He hadn’t completely messed things up with Grian, at least. The man was willing to work with him again! That was something, right?

For the next Buildswap, Mumbo was ready. He’d gotten his suit cleaned, and the familiar material made him feel much more comfortable. He wasn’t even late this time!

Grian was noticeably absent though.

The two judges from last time didn’t seem too bothered by it, having their own discussion off to the side.

A tug at his sleeve made Mumbo jolt. “Something wrong?” Grian asked innocently.

“You weren’t here a moment ago.” Mumbo relaxed.

“Nah, I’ve been here the whole time. Invisibility just wore off.” Grian smiled cheekily. “Like my outfit?”

Mumbo glanced down at him. “What on earth…?”

Grian had an ill-fitting suit that mirrored Mumbo’s own suit, black with a red tie. “I guess we match again.” His smile widened. “What a strange coincidence.”

“That was an accident!”

“How do you know this wasn’t an accident?”

“The suit doesn’t even fit you,” Mumbo pointed out.

“Neither did the sweater. It seemed a bit tight on you,” Grian shot back, still smiling.

Mumbo’s eyebrows furrowed, but a faint smile tugged at his lips. He was grateful that was the moment when the judges decided to nudge them into starting.

He wasn’t sure what to think of the implications that Grian might’ve been checking him out.

#grumbo month #grumbo #hermitshipping #grian #mumbo #cloud writes

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lutawolf · 1 year

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Never Let Me Go D/s breakdowns Ep 3

As of right now, there is no D/s relationship, friendship or otherwise. Is there a D/s element? Yes! Palm is without a doubt submissive. The verdict is still out on Nueng. Is there a power imbalance? Abso-fucking-lutely. But is there a distinct power play line between work and play? That's the question. One that has only gotten murkier rather than clearer, but I'm a determined bitch.

Alright, Palm shows up late. We see submission from him with his dad. Look at Nueng, he's getting smarter. Palm's dad might be Dominant, but he's subservient, and he has no way around this. Good Job Nueng.

Notice in the care how Palm starts looking down when Nueng is talking about academics. He gets a little bratty, shows a little comfort, and daddy has to give eyes in the mirror.

The way Nueng shoots up to support Palm can't be marked as Dom. While it is a Dom move, we will also see this with bosses, leaders, and friends. Palm certainly appreciated it, though. That cute smile.

I don't trust Ben, and neither should you. Why you trusting him. You're too trusting, dipshit. Look at Palm in his palm shirt, smiling at Nueng. Then here comes the person we don't trust. See, Ben already trying to start shit. Yeah dude, I haven't seen you help handle a prank yet. Poor Nueng, so devastated. See how he told Ben he could manage his own schedule. Palm is submissive, but he isn't showing Ben any submission. Because Ben doesn't have his respect.

What are you up to, Ben. Trying to get Palm out of the way. Ben is going to dance with Nueng. Both of them staring at each other is not obvious at all. OMG! Palm is imagining him and Nueng dancing together. Well damn, we got confirmation that he 100% recognizes his feelings for Palm. Any doubts about Palm being subby, watch how fast he rolls over when his dad tells him to go to sleep.

"I’m thinking that I am protecting someone. Someone important to my life. Someone that I love. Someone that I really care about. Someone who I can’t live without. When I think of that person, I feel more determined. Love is much more powerful than hatred."

The way he looks him straight in the eyes when saying this. He is clearly trying to communicate with Palm. Lots of eye contact, so we are seeing some change there. Straight shoulders, head up, there's lots of confidence in this setting. Smiling and happy until Nueng asks who he thinks of protecting. He doesn't lie, but doesn't answer. The song lyrics while he shoots, though. ♪ Don’t be afraid even if we are separated ♪ ♪ Just stay there and wait for me, I’ll find you ♪♪ No matter what tomorrow brings, please remember this ♪♪ I will live only for you ♪

That's some heavy shit that could mean a whole lot of things... When it says ♪ I will live only for you ♪ he looks straight at Nueng. Which honestly isn't surprising. I haven't heard about mommy dearest yet, and dad isn't exactly caring. I mean, he's putting his kid in harms way to protect someone else's kid. Yeah, Palm hasn't had a lot of people give a shit about him.

See! I'm telling you! Ben is not to be trusted! Okay, Okay, but see how Palm talks to Chopper. He goes into subservient mode, but we don't see submissive. Chopper's dad is an ass. Palm is acting the same with Chopper's dad. Subservient, but not submissive. He isn't dominant like his dad, but he isn't submissive to these two either. Now, just because someone is submissive doesn't mean they will automatically act submissive to everyone.

I really don't trust Phum either. Betcha Nueng's necklace shows up missing in his locker. There was too much foreshadowing there for it not to.

Nueng teases Palm about talking back to him, and Palm looks down while smiling. He knows that Nueng wants him to talk back, and he feels good about making him happy. We're seeing a little brat, here. But we clearly see the submissive when he says, "It's alright, you can call me whatever you want. I don't mind." But he does seem upset. I think it's more the word servant and it being said to Ben. Nueng could call Palm a fool to his face and he wouldn't mind. So it's more about how it was done. Who called it on the locker!!!

Who called it on the jackass behind it!!! Well Phum, you pushed a submissive too far. The most dangerous creature is a submissive, protecting those they care about. It's while Palm is beating the shit out of Phum that we hear a repeat of what Palm said earlier.

This is when Nueng knows that Palm cares about him. I don't think he knows that Palm loves him. Just that Palm cares. Shut up Ben! Phum got what he deserved!!! He brought out a bat! A fucking bat! Don't bring a knife to a fist fight because you might find out that the other person has a knife too. Ben hasn't done shit for you, Nueng. Do I need to hit you again to knock some damn sense into you.

And this is supposed to be about D/s no commentary but me and my damn mouth.

I'm starting to see some Dom from Nueng. Not heavy, but he seems to be adapting to what Palm needs from him. Interesting. For instance, the basically telling Palm to shut up and let him put the medicine on.

The way Palm flirts is so cute. "Are you afraid of me?" "No. I’m a bit surprised. What made you that furious?" "I think it was my instinct." "Instinct? Then you have a crazy instinct. You did it without worrying about yourself." "The person that I need to worry about is you."

Look at how shy he gets. Oh my goodness, Palm. I'm getting way too attached to you when I have a feeling this isn't going to end well.

Alright, so this was a lot more commentary than anything else. Sorry! Hope you enjoy 💜💜💜

#never let me go series #never let me go #palm x nuengdiao #palm and nueng #nuengpalm #luta opinions #luta talks kink #luta talks never let me go #coconuts mafia

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ahundredtimesover · 3 months

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Okay firstly, wow. Mimi the way Jungkook redresses OC's bandage, it's so domestic and cute. And how they're both vulnerable to each other (Jungkook especially since it's the first time), it's so sweet and it's actually something that happens in real life..

I love how realistic this whole fic is mimi. 1) They sleep on TWO beds and not on one like how it goes in most stories/dramas/movies. 2) OC does not end up wearing Jungkook's sweatshirt and she wears other actual clothes. 3) The owners of the guesthouse don't automatically assume they are a couple and how one person addresses Jungkook as OC's friend to her. I love thisss. Mimi you're giving us such nice butterfly-inducing scenes that are not only REALISTIC but also when both OC and Jungkook are PROFESSIONAL. The way Jungkook and OC both know they're attracted to each other and they both want to seek eachother's company but refrain from doing so because they know it's not professional and they have to stay in their limits, that's really nice mimi. And also how OC acknowledges the crush she has on Jungkook and tries to act on it like an actual mature adult.

And let's not forget that teeeenyyy bit of jealousy Jungkook felt and acknowledged when Jimin and OC hug

Maybe it's only me thinking this way mimi, but isn't OC always on the recieving end when it comes to her friends? I mean yes, she's not as free as Jimin and Soomin but what about Yoongi? Yes, OC is kind and understanding to Jungkook, but (correct me if I'm wrong) she also did accept to Yoongi that she does this because it's also beneficial to her, right? Maybe it's not mentioned in the fic because the plot focuses on Jungkook and OC's relationship but I really am curious to know how OC is her friends..

And I'm saying this again coz of how you told you literally had to ask people on how they should give a chance to The Light of Dead Stars. That fic is literally my most favourite fic of all time 🩷 It's just so beautiful and how it's with Jin and how it also shows OC's feelings' transition from Namjoon to Jin 🩷🩷

I love it so much mimi🩷🩷🩷

I'm waiting to re-read it once I'm done-done with my exams

Okkk I’m back to asks and I’m sorry this is late but I remember being so happy when I read this! ☺️ As for that whole guesthouse scene - yes, I didn’t go with the usual bc I didn’t feel like it was time, and I’m glad it’s something you appreciate bc there’s also something intimate with a two-bed situation?? And ok, with all the tension, there’s bound to be some butterfly-inducing moments bc they’re honestly so cute about their feelings (savor this) 🤭

As for your question regarding OC as a friend… yes, it seems like she’s always on the receiving end especially with Jimin and Soomin who drive to her, treat her, are affectionate to her. But she’s the type of person that people like being around bc of the emotional safety she provides - as I got older, I learned that this is an important yet underrated aspect of any relationship. Yoongi told her once that she gives comfort to people, and her friends feel this. Jimin and Soo are rich socialites who also deal with alot of stress and drama but they let all that go with OC. They’re themselves with her, and she doesn’t push them away. Yoongi has a no-nonsense attitude but she doesn’t judge him; he’s introverted and she doesn’t force him to socialize or anything. He didn’t want their friendship to change and she didn’t let it. There’s something welcoming about her. She can’t offer much of the material things but there’s safety in her presence, and that’s what Jungkook has realized, too. And that’s what I love about her. They’re all subtle since she’s not a grand person, but the care is truly felt by the other person.

And yay, another TLODS enthusiast 🥹🥹 I’m so happy you loved it! I think it’s my one fic where neither one of them started with feelings for the other, like it organically just happened hehe THANK YOU.

And thank you for this. This was such a lovely message 💕💕 I hope you’re well, anon!

#mimianswers #fic: iwyts #re: tlods

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enluv · 6 months

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COCO!!! it’s been so long i’m so sorry i’m responding late😭 ik my last ask was a lot so i’m really thankful that you shared your thoughts! i’m so glad you mentioned all the different types of love there is cause i think oftentimes, non-romantic love is so overlooked bc of how much romantic love is valued in society. i’ve never met someone who’s fav holiday is valentine’s day and that’s so sweet that you celebrate all the different types of love🥹 i’m definitely gonna start doing that from now on! i have watched pride and prejudice once and i remember loving it!! definitely due for a rewatch!! unfortunately i have not been able to watch new girl yet since school has been so busy 😔 the SECOND winter break starts, that’s the first thing i’m doing!! i hope you’re doing well right now given finals week is just around the corner. i’m currently battling through my toughest week with a midterm and final for the same class back to back, a final speech presentation, and my first acapella concert! (if i don’t come back to update you by the end of the week, that means i’ve lost the battle) whatever you have going on right now, remember to take care of yourself mentally and physically! you’ll do great on your finals and we’ll get through this together <3

nessa!

NESSA!!! okay i can finally properly answer your ask now that I’m free for a month and don’t have to worry about school (nasty) !! DONT APOLOGIZE FOR ANSWERING LATE OMG AS IF I DIDNT TAKE LIKE AN ENTIRE MONTH LAST TIME BYEEEEEE! honestly I really enjoyed your last ask and how it gave me like the chance to talk about love, and I completely agree with you! non-romantic love is overlooked because society values romantic love so much!! and don’t get me wrong I completely understand why but all love is important like we need to value them all or we get stuck yearning for romantic love and forget that we have other types of love in our lives! but yes Valentine’s Day is my favorite holiday !! it’s just so much fun and I encourage you to celebrate it!! seeing all the love around you will definitely make you happy and full I promise! i hope you didn’t lose the battle nessa 😞 you’ll be missed dearly if you did! but thankfully I survived finals and made it here to winter break, if you have any recommendations for me to watch for this long (and much needed) break do send them my way! hopefully you’re okay and thriving though, I am once again very sorry for this late reply but I do hope you were able to make it to winter break! whenever you see this don’t feel at all rushed to answer, take your time and enjoy your break <3

#so happy i was finally able to sit down and answer this omg #I’ve been thinking about it for weeks now 😭#💬.direct message?!#nessa <3!

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ciaossu-imagines · 10 months

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Thank you so much. And I see. Hope you enjoy the rest of the anime since it really is enjoyable, even if it hurts at times. And yes. So many people suffered and since I love more than just my fave it wasn’t nice to see. My fave is Captain Hitsugaya. And of course. Who are actually your faves now that we’re talking about it? He’s still not okay but I know he will be when the time comes since he still has an important part later on (which was kinda shown in one of the first trailers which was a nice surprise). Thank you so much. Like always, mixed. I had a video call with my friend yesterday which lasted two hours and the only reason it ended was because she had to go out to walk her dog. We also plan on calling later again this weekend which I’m looking forward to. I told her about an idea I have for a new story based on the Jujutsu Kaisen series and she approves so I might end up writing that at some point (even though I don’t have as much faith as usual in it since the series is very different from what I usually write about). I was also a bit sad because there’s a fave of mine from a different series that dies at some point and I was rewatching some episodes with him and seeing him being his great self just made it hurt. But I am glad that we got what we did of him because it’s beautiful nonetheless.

I also hope that your week calms down and that you can take it easy in one way or another.

You’re always welcome! Thank you so much for always wanting to talk to me, even if I’m not being super active! I really appreciate it! And I do enjoy Bleach and really, I should get back into either reading it or watching it. I mostly stuck to reading but I have been told that the fillers in Bleach, while excessive, were at least enjoyable. And honestly, I should have suspected that. Most of the people I know who love Bleach have Hitsugaya as a favourite and I definitely do think he’s a really cool character and I enjoy him, but he’s never been one of my favourites. I do love all of Squad 11, Hanatarou, Renji, Kira, Shuhei, and I’m a huge slut for both Shinji, Akon, and Kensei, not going to lie. All of the Visoreds were amazing. And, since I’ve been massively spoiled and know how everything goes and how the series ends, I know some of those characters really get hurt.

I’m so glad you got to have a video call with your friend! I know you said you don’t get to talk as much as you would like and I hope you’ll get more chances to chat! And I’ve watched the entirety of the first season of Jujutsu Kaisen and I definitely get what you mean. The only reason it’s not on my list is because I find it rather difficult to write for so I wish you all the best of luck! And thank you for the well wishes. Today was absolutely brutal…I had to have payroll done by last night and there was two employees who just would not get me their hours for the last week properly and who didn’t swipe as they should’ve through their shifts with their cards…anyway, when one of them called this morning to give me their hours, I had to tell them they missed the deadline for payroll that I had been super clear about and because of that, they were going to be missing last weeks pay off their paycheques. There was nothing I could do about it, honestly…anyway, long story short, I was told at some point during the argument that they hoped I both got raped on the way home tonight or hit by a fucking bus and like…work’s taking care of that and being awesome about it since I had to report that above me but it still fucking sucked. I hate piss poor men who hate being told no by a woman and resort to threats or wishes of violence on them. I’m trying so hard to not be blocked creatively, and to get things done here, even though I’m spending until seven at night at work, and while I love one of my friends dearly, they have been using me as a free therapist lately so rather tough week but you know, things will get better and I’m trying to stay as positive as possible! Taking time for self-care and happiness boosting things like rewatching favourite movies (Ghibli’s been a huge one for me lately because fuck, are they gorgeous)! I hope you, and each and every person reading this, is doing amazing, having fantastic weeks, and remembering to take time for self-care as well!

#admin chatter #some venting #i love my job but it sucks at times

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katsukidynam1ght · 2 years

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KATS RANT TIME PART 2

forgive my formatting i have no memory of how i did part one and it is too late for me to care at all

big trigger warning on discussion of abuse and violence for this one! read at your own risk. this has a lot of potential to be upsetting especially because it’s late and i’m struggling to express things as neatly as i usually try to.

today’s topic: some of you are way too sensitive when it comes to physical violence

“kats this is a touchy topic. abuse isn’t okay ever” you are absolutely correct! abuse in any form is never okay and i do not condone it. do not hurt other people. just don’t.

but not everything is abuse.

try to understand what i’m saying here because it’s late and i’m tired but this is important stuff.

society is conditioning everyone to believe that any kind of physical act is abuse and honestly? no the fuck it isn’t. prolonged violence would be, yes. extreme violence would be, yes. if it is done to be abusive and cause harm, if it is done intentionally with that in mind, yes. if it is repetitive and unrepentant, yes!

(i am not saying violence as a whole is okay either do not take that away from this. violence is not okay but sometimes people are impulsive or haven’t been taught. that doesn’t make it okay, but it makes them human. you gotta cut people slack when it counts. that said: do not let yourself or the people you love be mistreated and if you recognize a situation then do what you can to remedy it.)

but look. (and oh, kats, baby, they’re gonna hate you for this one—) i got spankings growing up. yeah yeah, “you didn’t turn out fine kats look at you” but that wasn’t the spankings, i promise. my mom or dad swatting me on the ass two or three times did not give me Psychological Damage.

(granted: i have good parents who love me a great deal and take care of my needs. their discipline was not excessive and only enacted when necessary, and this is the kind of physical behavior i am referring to — i am not talking about parents who use discipline as an excuse to abuse their children. i am not saying spankings will never damage a kid’s brain. everyone’s different. my point is merely that something like what my parents did to discipline me does not qualify as abusive treatment.)

or how’s this — my brother and i have beat up on each other a bit throughout the years. once when we were preteens i pinned him down and smacked him with a pair of dirty socks that he threw at me. once when we were teenagers i stuck my tongue out at him and he smacked me hard enough my ear rang. once when we were itty bitty kids we got in a fight and he bit my shoulder so hard it bruised.

(and one time he accidentally cut the inside of my lip with a wooden stake. i still find this too impressive to be upset about tbh)

kids beat on each other. they do that. so long as you teach them “hey, that’s not okay, don’t do that” it’s cool! sometimes it’s roughhousing-turned-violent and sometimes you just gotta get the anger out somehow and it’s better to direct it at someone who’s stuck to you by blood as opposed to literally anyone else.

and that’s not abuse. (again, yeah, i got it. it absolutely can be. i’m not talking about when it is. please understand that and cut me some slack.)

so often in so many different fandoms, people get really hung up on the way characters interact with each other, and they get Really Hung Up on the violence. and i get it! violence isn’t okay and really people need to cope better.

but you have Got to put the characters in the context of their story.

we’re talking about teenagers — hormonal pubescent teenagers who are still learning to get a fucking grip and going through intensely traumatic experiences on a regular basis! they’re also training to be heroes, which, yeah, is a pretty violent field! there are going to be times where they will want to hit or kick or spit or scratch and It Is What It Is. they get disciplined when they go too far and they control themselves pretty much all the time. (and no i am not saying violence is ever excusable. if that’s your takeaway from this you’re wrong and i will probably block you out of annoyance. violence is not excusable, but it isn’t inherently worthy of the fandom’s wrath.)

so you have to think about it within the context. you can’t apply real-world standards of “acceptable” violence. (oh dear me that is barely coherent. forgive pls)

some things are very obviously abusive and not okay: take kotaro shimura’s treatment of tenko, or endeavor’s treatment of rei and shouto. those are not okay. those are abusive.

(this is absolutely not the time to say this because i’m sure plenty of people are annoyed already But! ayo i am Here for endeavor redemption. psa that you don’t have to let your abusers back into your life but it is okay and healthy for you to forgive them and let them become better people without you! abusers are in fact allowed to make progress. and that’s a good thing because we don’t want them hurting anyone else isn’t that right <3 i will not let those people back in my life but i hope they are able to become the people i wish they were when i knew them.)

but okay back to the teenager thing. like this — i don’t like monoma. he annoys the shit out of me and i really just want to punch him sometimes. but kendo smacks his head a lot to knock him down and shut him up.

and y’know what? i don’t see any fucking person claiming that’s abuse.

now — that’s either because they recognize “well, that’s not abusive. it might be a little mean, but that doesn’t constitute abuse” or because she’s a girl, and i hope it’s the former and not the latter. that’d be even more obnoxious.

so if you can do it in those circumstances, why’s it hard to do in other areas? why’s it so hard to look at a character and go “man, that’s shitty behavior, but it’s not really abuse and it doesn’t make them a bad person”? because it doesn’t feel that hard to me, but hey! i’m just kats and what do i know.

(now again: small physical acts can escalate into bigger violent and abusive behaviors. mind your red flags and don’t let anyone treat you badly.)

i’m not saying this from a standpoint of “oh kats but the only people who have ever been physical with you are people you love” not true! i am saying this from a standpoint of “i have experienced things that are physical abuse and also things that are not physical abuse”! so i do have at least a little understanding of what i am talking about.

“kats your objective contextual view of this subject is really annoying” thank you babydoll i understand viewing things inside of their context frustrates the real world application but at the end of the day it is a work of fiction and you cannot expect me to use real world standards on fictional world violence. blowing you a kiss for your troubles <3

gist is: not every small act of violence is abuse and holy hell some people really need to get a grip on what qualifies as abuse.

(babydoll i can even argue that my favs choking each other out doesn’t count as abuse given the circumstances. all about character pov and perception and as a writer those are skills i am required to have.)

anyways. you can’t be a “violence isn’t the answer. it’s the question and the answer is yes” person while still claiming every act of violence is abuse. or whatever. it’s late as fuck i want to sleep

rant over don’t hurt people even if it’s not abuse it’s not okay thanks goodnight

#kats rants #bnha #mha #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #please do not argue with me on this post i do not have the capacity to care #if you argue with me on this post you’re giving me permission to be a dick to you #<- that’s from a prev post but still so true of me #i’m trying so hard not to let this rant get seen because i just know someone’s going to want to bite me for it

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bugtransport · 1 year

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Tatami Galaxy (novel) finished 2/28/23

yes i am late on this one. okay. if it is not obvious i'm already a really big fan of this series so this is going to be fully biased. sorry! i got this book as a gift; i was originally gonna wait for the paperback version to be released because honestly i typically like paperbacks better than hardcovers... they're cheaper and easier to hold and i like the way that they age and show the love you poured into them over the years (my h2g2 paperback omnibus that i carried around for like 2 years in my backpack and is held together with 3 different kinds of tape and a dream being the prime example of this) but what was i gonna do. say no? it's the tatami fuckin galaxy, baby. what the hell. it's wild to me that i've actually read this now.

first off i just wanna say how cool it was getting to read the translator's note at the end of the book and hearing how passionate they were about this author's work in particular and how they got into translating with the goal of being able to translate his work. it's fun knowing that something was made by people who actually care a lot about it. i think that shows throughout.

for those who don't know what the fuck the tatami galaxy is even about: cringefail pathetic guy college student realizes that he's pissed away the last two years of his life and wishes that he could redo it all over again to stop himself from getting wrapped up in a bunch of bullshit and we (the audience) get to see him fulfill that wish through time loop shenanigans that he (the main character) is only somewhat aware of but actually every choice he makes that could have possibly had him do something different leads him back to the same place he was before: depressed alone in his shitty little 4.5 tatami mat room. important side characters include ozu (best friend/worst enemy, connected by the black string of fate) and akashi (love interest kinda/ruthlessly autistic, girl of all time) among other recurring characters who i'm not going to talk about because time constraints and i think they're better experienced naturally so, there you go. if you're curious as to what the fuck i've been talking about you have a reason to get into it.

one of the things i really loved being able to read the novel after seeing the anime adaptation is being able to contrast the ways that they were able to bring in the time loop aspect which... really is not all that present for as much as i talk about it; it's core to the series but it's not really a mystery that needs to be uncovered, it's just the vehicle for which we can explore the main character's wish fulfillment fantasy and come to realize that actually, all the problems are with him and his pathetic little life, the spineless little worm. however i do love a good time loop and will continue to sell it as such. the repetition of passages in the book, the fact that the main character and ozu have very similar conversations in different places, the deja vu, the way each section ends the same, it all builds a really solid but not ridiculously over the top loop. like i said, it's just a vehicle. in the first 3 parts of the book at least.

as the novel is written in first person we're really able to dive into that unreliable narration more than we were in the anime which, while being narrated by the mc, really has to be third person and therefore gives a little more credence to the reality of what's being shown. the anime gets really out there with its visual interpretations and combined with the mc's narration like, it's obvious that everything you see is biased from his perspective, but... to pull an example out of my ass (and this is not a direct quote because i can't be bothered, don't come for me) there's one point where he's trying to describe himself and he's going off like: picture a guy in your head. a nice looking, smart guy, with a beautiful black haired woman by his side. he's going off about his studies. he seems like the kind of guy who has friends and is natural in social situations. now, that guy's not me, but please picture me like that.

you get what i mean? he's that kinda guy. i love a good kinda cringey main character but i get that that kind of main character isn't for everyone. however it is for me. it's fun watching him fail through life and kind of accidentally learn things along the way and then to have the big culmination of the book (the 4th part, where the aforementioned vehicle crashes and) where he ends up stuck in a literal loop with no way out of his apartment but through all the different tatami rooms that belong to the different versions of himself that he could have been and realizing that whatever path he takes he'll still end up the same but that there are small joys to be felt in life still, that he has the connections he's made in all of these worlds and realizes fuck, i've been dreaming about this rose colored campus life for far too long and i didn't even realize what i had.

and the symbolism with akashi being afraid of moths?? it's just too good. had to throw that in there because every time i think about it i get all hehehe it itches my brain in the right way. i think she got a bit more fleshed out in the anime but i do still love what there was for her in the book.

i love the tatami galaxy! really fun time for me, felt like coming home. genuinely might try and pick up another by the same author. apparently he has a thing for these sopping little wet idiot protagonists and i just love reading about them.

do i recommend it? ^ read it if the above applies to you too lol

p.s. kamen rider V3 is mentioned! THAT'S MY FRIEND KAZAMI SHIRO HIIIIII KAZAMIIIII

#official bugtransport 2023 media recap #tatami galaxy crash course from a guy who didn't even go to college #this is MY rose colored campus life okay??

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yisanged · 2 years

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wait i wanna hear your judgements on all the milgram characters now because im curious and i feel like it actually says a lot about a person. if you wanna

yes hi sam hi. okay.

well first i want to say that i'm not super knowledgeable on all the theories and analyses out there so there might be stuff i'm missing that would change my opinions. i am still kinda lost on where exactly you get access to all the milgram content so there's a lot i'm not in the know on. second is that i don't think it's really fair to judge whether or not the characters are forgivable especially since we don't know all the details yet. i obviously learned about milgram a bit late but i would've voted innocent for all of them honestly because like. they all caused the death of another person for sure which is obviously Bad. but i feel like we don't really have a right to form opinions on whether they're forgivable or not. there's still a lot we don't know about their individual circumstances and even if we did know everything we're not even involved other than as outside observers so idk it just doesn't fully sit right. even if they are fictional characters created specifically to be judged by us. so yeah i would've voted them all innocent and i probably will for trial 2 too unless shit starts hitting the fan. of course i do have opinions about each of the characters beyond that and i will be glad to share them 💯

my favorites first. haruka is. scrunkly. fr. his presumed crimes are beating that dog to death and drowning/choking his brother which i think on a personal level is one of the worse crimes out of the characters? but i like him so it's okay. i'm interested in learning more about his situation and character his first trial video left me wondering about that stuff the most out of all of them. amane. ouugh. religious trauma always gets to me in characters. people who said she needed to get voted guilty so she learns the consequences of her actions or whatever are so annoying... like yeah sure that stuff is important i guess but. you think the best way to teach morals to a 12 yo raised in a cult is by slapping her with the guilty and unforgivable label after she gets kidnapped to a strange prison??? while not even knowing what might happen to her after she is voted guilty????? seriously what did they do to her i might kill. anyways. futa. he's a twitter user and he has a black and white sense of justice and thinks he has the authority to judge someone as good or bad. none of those are points in his favor but idk i still really like his character for some reason. i think if he made some friends and stopped going on social media he would be mostly fixed honestly. mu i also really like not for any particular reason... i mean she seems kind of spoiled and whiny but idk. i just like her. being the odd girl out is a relatable experience for me. she's pretty and her song was one of my favorites. these four are the ones i care the most about and want to learn more about

the rest..... i never had any strong feelings towards mahiru in the beginning but i feel kind of bad that she was one of the few that got voted guilty like the way she said things along the lines of if you leave me i'll die and i can't live without you was kind of. uh. but i didn't think her crime seemed that unforgivable especially compared to some of the others that didn't get voted guilty? idk. i mentioned not liking mikoto and i stand by that. i don't really buy into the mental illness/multiple personalities theories and i'll honestly be kind of disappointed if they turn out to be true that's such an overdone and harmful and annoying murderer trope. i think he's just a guy that likes violence and killing and is really good at lying about it after. which is pretty slay for him i guess. it just annoys me how many people latch on to the mental illness thing and it annoys me even more how many people are horny for this guy. they're probably the reason i don't like him actually other than that i don't really have anything against him. i'm not a hardcore yuno fan like she doesn't make me normal but i do love and support her. i like kotoko too the vigilante type thing i'm pretty sure she has going on is interesting but. i know i said i would vote them all innocent but i don't love that her getting voted innocent is leading her into thinking she's working with es behind the scenes i don't think she's that trustworthy. shidou. organ harvester possibly? medical malpracticer most definitely. i don't know i guess i'd want more details before saying anything else i don't have many thoughts about him with what we have right now. i don't really like kazui on a personal level but his story does interest me i want to know more details. es is there. i'm curious about what the story there is and all but they honestly don't interest me that much beyond the standard amount.

anyways this has been my opinions on the milgram characters. it's not super in depth i just kinda briefly touched on my main thoughts because this answer is already too long i am so sorry. but. yeah. i hope you still think im cool

#owww ow yowch....! thoughts about media #SORRY THIS IS SO LONG. characters make me so.#ask

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corruptedsilence · 2 years

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Anonymous asked: We're not mutuals but you're one of those that I continue to follow cuz I really like your content! I think you're an awesome and talented person. When I see you down I sometimes want to reach out to help but I am unsure how to do so? But I'm always wishing you the best.

Like, I don’t mean to sound rude or pessemistic but my Depression is a force to be reckoned with. My GF can testify that it’s not an easy thing and I tend to spiral fast. It’s why I am thinking I need to re-evaluate my medication because my current one is not helping anymore.

The best way to help me if we aren’t mutuals is probably just, sending anons of encouragement? Or just, idk honestly. It’s hard to know since even my mutuals and friends aren’t able to always help either. If worse comes to worse sending me something nice or sending me something to get my mind off of the depressive mood tends to help. I often try to distract my brain from the depressive feeling with writing, or I write out how I feel. Lately neither of those worked since my depression hyperfocused on my writing and feelings of being not good enough to be around.

Right now I am not depressive at least I don’t think so. I’ve also kinda taking some gummies(THC) to help keep me calm since yes I do have them because they do help my anxiety calm it’s tits (all my friends saying i should try to get a medical license since i know it helps but hfjekw)

But it doesn’t hurt to send a helpful or kind anon, or throwing something out to distract my brain from whatever it is. These are my main ways of being able to give me energy to beat up my thoughts because reassurance is something my brain needs as more like the ammunition or weapon I can beat it back. Think of me holding and I know it’s not the best analogy in modern day but, me holding an empty gun against the monster that is my depression. Reassurance mixed with tough love gives me another bullet to beat it back. Though there is no silver bullet each one gives me another thing I can use to logically beat back my emotions. I try to fight it with Logic, but when I have no more ammunition to use, I am overcome by it.

I am trying to work with my therapist to not need to rely on everyone else all the time for this, and most of the time I don’t. I don’t talk a lot about the struggles I have daily, it’s just when it bubbles up too much I feel an impulse to say it, to speak out, to scream into the void and call for help. I feel bad doing so, I don’t like depression posting, but often it’s when I’m at my end do I make those posts.

I learned recently if I don’t ask for help or don’t seek someone out I can act in ways that are extremely self harming which again is why I’m speaking with my therapist and psychiatrist about it.

I do appreciate the want to help, and you’re always welcome to just know sometimes people can’t help and please don’t put my mental state and how it is on your shoulders. You are never obligated to help, you are not my therapist, and sometimes nothing can be done but that’s okay. Never do more than you yourself can handle, never hurt yourself to help me or anyone because you matter as well, your mental health is also important and shouldnt be compromised to help me

Thank you so much, just seeing this message does mean a lot knowing there are people who do care and do want to help <3 Thank you friend

#Out for a Bite // OOC #Screams from the Abyss // MT

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gyu-effect · 5 months

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Hi! Wanted to ask if you or anyone here has any advice. I broke up with my boyfriend very recently because we have really different communication styles/needs and my needs aren’t being met (he can go a week with no contact with no problem (and has a few times without a heads up) whereas it makes me sad and anxious) but I love who he is as a person and we have similar life goals, ideals and morals.

We’re still friends because we care for one another but right now I just find myself looking for reasons to text him. When he eventually texts back I get really excited and happy but then immediately feel like a pathetic loser for it because im the one who asked him to meet me halfway in multiple discussions and it just wasn’t happening.

I know realistically that I should stop reaching out to him but I still want to buy him Christmas presents and ask him how his day was at work or if he ate well. How do I stop doing this to myself?

(I honestly hate dating like someone please just wife me up and we can commit to making each other feel secure in our relationship for the rest of our life 🥲)

so first of all this is REALLY REALLY assholic of me to respond to this so late I'M SO SO SO SORRY TO RESPOND TO THIS

tbh im a lot like you so i completely understand from where you're coming. it feels really draining when youre the only one at the giving end and never at the receiving end and yet no matter how much ever the person seems unenthusiastic you still give your 1000000% at it.

i understand how you feel and it does really feel pathetic sometimes like why am i so desperate??? they're not like this for me...they are okay without my existence.

the only thing that kkkkkkkind of holds me back from immediately jumping to responses, buying gifts being overly friendly because i think the person is very very important is honestly by pausing, and thinking. everytime said person texts me (after eternity) and i get super excited, i pause for a while and just think...hey they took some time to respond right...maybe i should slow down. and then i dont respond for a while...at least till the initial happiness and excitement has died down.

i have a friend in college just like this...i really really like him because hes the only one with home i can have hours long discussions about the books we've read and music so i enjoy talking to him but i feel like he isnt that enthusiastic as me...even while texting hes okay with short messages and just texting sometimes while im always jumping to his texts. so nowadays everytime i do that, i just stop and think

really thats all i can say tbh...like i said im just like you so even im helpless.

just think before you buy him stuffs or ask him such sweet things...will he do the same for you? you deserve someone who loves you the way you want to be loved. and yes he might be a great friend and all but maybe thats better that way...

if anyone has any advice pls do tell us tho :'D

asdfghjkl i can see where youre coming from abt dating but as someone whos grown up in country wheer predominantly arranged marriages exist, i think dating is really really good. like him for example, what if you had got married? you would have been unhappy for so long then TT

but yeah, marriage is abt communications, commitments and like you said making each other feel secure in relationships TT ill agree with that part that dating is a bit more...fickle

#╼ 𝐀𝐒𝐊𝐒

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cantstopwontstoptalking · 1 year

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it's the weekend PEOPLE !!

It's been a hot minute since I've been on Tumblr and I already feel like coming to my home after an tough week. Honestly, now that I look back I really feel I just really needed this and was the BESTEST DECISION OF 2023 !!!!!!

It's an safe place where I can be honest and spill my mind. I don't feel like being the real me on Instagram or snapchat as so many people who know me are just waiting and ready to judge without even knowing the actual me.

but I just hope and wish that I'll be able to let my walls down and just be "ME" here.

You know munchkins' Life lately has been so interesting yet hectic. I am just all fired up with so many things, resolving so many unstable aspects of life....trying to maintain balance between everything.. It's exhausting no doubt but I don't mind doing that because why not? I freaking choosed this life bro and there isn't any escape now! I have put it on the back burner for too long, doing everything else and making it feel like a hobby I simply don't have time for but it has left me feeling miserable and detached from the person I truly am but I'm slowly allowing myself to just do things and not think much about it and to my surprise I feel it's working! *touchwood*

Currently a lot has been happening munchkins' this Poor girl was unwell for straight one week ( and yes, I'm totally alright now) so many internal tests, projects, assignments were scheduled for this week but hey? you know what? I successfully managed to got through all of them. *minute of appreciation for this girl please*

okay so random I know but all my people who are struggling to find something good to watch Don't worry! I've got your back... just finished watching this movie called " NO EXIT " Guys you need to watch this! you may or may not like the storyline or plot of the movie but trust me I'm sure you will be hooked to your screen during the movie... even till the end you won't catch the plot. Have fun munchkins' one life friend !!!

so, yes where were we? ahh got it.... it's finally the WEEKEND and my mindset for it is...very chill, calm, positive. gonna Spend some time with myself, going to taking care of me, my body and my mental health! I have recently made this also as my weekend routine it is just so important I have understood that!

With that, going to have all that delicious food ( and regret next week lol ) with some cool ass music and will Definitely do the things I find happiness in' So Yeah that's pretty much all for this weekend

okay dokeyy munchkins' now just go enjoy your weekend and your girl also going to do exactly the same now

See you next week till then miss me :)

with love, sakshi

#weekend #no exit #productivity #been busy #relaxingday #positive energy

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sunflowershouto · 3 years

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if they thought you liked the other twin (osamu, atsumu)

𝐚/𝐧: i was suddenly struck by inspo for the miya twins so here's this -leo

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: pining fluff, friends to lovers, light angst with a happy ending

my haikyuu masterlist

𝐀𝐓𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐔

✰ Atsumu is so whipped for you.

✰ He enjoys the attention he gets for being a star player, and even the fangirls help to feed his ego sometimes, but he didn't care about any of them. Not like he cares about you.

✰ They don't really know him, so what's the point?

✰ You're different to him, though. You didn't care about the fans or the TV interviews, or any of the usual things that people noticed about him.

✰ You got to know him, and it made him want to get to know you back, and somewhere along the way, Atsumu fell in love.

✰ The only problem was Osamu.

✰ Well, maybe that wasn't the best way to put it. It wasn't like Osamu was doing anything wrong, but it was hard for Tsumu not to notice how much time you'd been spending with his brother.

✰ You'd come up to Osamu after practices and whisper something to him, and he'd nod, and Atsumu would have to watch as the two of you disappeared off somewhere that he wasn't invited.

✰ It killed him inside a little, since he'd always thought that he was closer to you than Samu was; if you had feelings for Osamu, then why hadn't you told him?

✰ He tried not to be a dick about it; he would whine a little whenever you and Osamu would disappear after practices, but what he was showing was only the tip of the iceberg when it came to how deeply he was hurting at the thought of you falling in love with his brother.

✰ It was after another practice, and there you were on the sidelines with that stupid freakin' beautiful smile that he loved so much. He was standing by Osamu as they packed their duffel bags back up, and he tried to ignore the pang in his chest as you jogged up, surely going to drag Samu away again.

"Atsumu!" you called. "Could we- Uh... Could we talk?"

That was a surprise.

He glanced to Osamu, who gave him a small nod before shouldering his bag and walking off the court without another glance. He couldn't even be nervous about whatever it was you wanted to talk about; he was just glad that he was finally the one that you were speaking to. "Sure thing, darlin'," he replied, picking up his bag and following you to a more private area.

"Okay, uh- Here goes: There's something I've been needing to tell you for a while, and-"

"Ah see..." Atsumu sighed, all of that hurt hitting him again like a ton of bricks. This was where you finally did it right? This was where you'd tell him that you and Osamu were together, this was where you'd finally rip his heart out.

"You... do?"

"Yeah." He tried not to sound bitter, but he found it seeping through anyway, a harshness weighing down on his inflection. "You and 'Samu are goin' out, right? Figured that out for m'self a while ago, darlin'. Ya don't gotta tell me."

"Wha-" You stared at him in bewilderment as the pieces click into place, and you realized what he'd been thinking all this time. You couldn't help it, and burst out into laughter, bringing a hand up to cover your mouth.

"What's so funny?" he asked, puffing his chest out slightly and crossing his arms. He'd spent so much effort trying his best not to lose his shit over the idea of you in love with Osamu, the least you could do was not laugh in his face.

"Atsumu, I am not dating your brother. In any way. I've never even thought about it. I asked you to talk because, well..."

"Oh. Oh m' God." And finally he got it.

"I really like you, y'know? And I was wondering if you'd want to go out sometime? Like, on a date? Osamu actually helped me make all the plans." You were far less nervous now, in part because of Atsumu's misunderstanding, but mostly because of the huge, goofy smile that spread across his face.

"So... I'm guessing you're on board?"

"Oh, sweetheart, you've got no idea," he chuckles, pulling you into a tight hug and kissing the top of your head. "Ya scared the hell outta me, y'know."

𝐎𝐒𝐀𝐌𝐔

✰ Osamu's feelings for you snuck up on him.

✰ He'd always been drawn to you, but he didn't think it was any different than anyone else. You were a cool person, and he liked that you saw him for him, and not as part of a matched set.

✰ He loves his brother, but can he be blamed for wanting some things to himself?

✰ He's not annoyed per-se when you start getting close with Atsumu—what he feels isn't harsh. It's more like a balloon deflating through a tiny outlet as he feels his importance to you slowly being overtaken by your friendship with Atsumu.

✰ He can't figure out why it bothers him so damn much when he sees you joking around with his twin, or even just cheering for him at matches.

✰ He doesn't place the feeling as jealousy until he's stuck at home, flicking through channels on TV until he lands on some crappy romance movie. He watches the two main characters play off of each other, and he can't help but realize that one of the leads reminds him of you.

✰ And then he pictures Atsumu across from you, and that awful feeling comes back to him, burning a hole in his chest.

✰ Strangely, it's not so bad once he knows what it is that he's feeling, because at least he can start to deal with it.

✰ Nonetheless, he's a little worried about you. Osamu can read his brother pretty well—well enough to know whether or not he has feelings for someone. Honestly, he'd never thought that Tsumu seemed interested in you.

✰ Valentine's day was tomorrow and Samu had been unfortunate enough to overhear a conversation between you and a friend.

"You're going to bring him chocolates?" Yua whispered to you, her eyes shining.

"Mhm! I think he'll really like them too! I'm gonna go home tonight and work on decorations for the box." You had no idea Osamu was listening, and if you did, you would have probably died on the spot.

"I think he'll say yes," she replied thoughtfully. "Some of the girls have been upset lately; they say that Miya-san really likes you."

Osamu wished in that moment that the earth beneath his feet would open up and swallow him whole. Had he been wrong? Did Atsumu feel the same way that you did? And worse, had a selfish part of him been hoping that you'd be rejected?

His jaw tightened and he turned away, careful not to draw your attention as he slipped off in the other direction.

He considered faking a cold the next day, but that was childish, wasn't it? He dragged himself out of bed and got to school, dreading lunch period, when he knew everything would finally come crashing down around him.

The bell rang for lunch, and he packed his things quickly, not wanting to be there to watch you confess to his brother.

Imagine his surprise when he felt a tug on his sleeve just as he reached the doorway, and turned to see you standing there in front of him.

"'Samu? Could we go somewhere a little more private?" you asked, tensing up slightly the way that you always did when you were nervous.

"Er... Yeah."

What? This wasn't at all what he'd thought would happen, and his head was swimming as he followed you to the library, staring at the brown paper bag that you clutched to your chest.

You ended up behind one of the taller shelves in the back, and Osamu's hands were twitching in his pockets as he stared down at you.

Time was moving agonizingly slowly as you opened the paper bag and withdrew a brightly colored, heart-shaped box.

OSAMU was written across the front in careful lettering, and the world stopped around him.

"Samu, I-"

"I'm in love with you," he breathed out, hands moving from his pockets as he stepped forward to place his hands on the sides of your face, closing the distance between the two of you in one fell swoop.

Before you could answer, his lips were on yours, and your heart was bursting.

He was grinning when he pulled away, eyes gleaming with adoration as he took in your smile.

"I love you too, you big dork. I... was not expecting this to go so smoothly," you admitted, reaching up a hand to brush back a lock of his hair.

He's beaming when he says, "Honey, you've got no clue just how long Ah've been wantin' to do that."

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