Consider this a part 2

I still think they would be friends

[ID: 6 images of Gregory from FNAF Security Breach and the crying child from FNAF 4. The crying child wears a striped hoodie and curly hair, Gregory is shown in his in-game design. In the first image, the crying child pushes his hair out of his face to reveal scars in the shape of bite marks on his forehead, looking up at them sadly. In the following image, Gregory says “Sick!” with a happy expression as the crying child, shown from behind, has three question marks over his head. The next set of images shows Gregory climbing out of Glamrock Freddy’s chest hatch, both waving happily at the crying child, who looks up at them from the corner of the image with an exclamation mark over his head. In the next image, the crying child is shown crying and waving his arms, a thought bubble picturing the mouth-stomach of Nightmare Fredbear from FNAF 4. Gregory’s (confused) and Glamrock Freddy’s (sad) heads are shown in reaction bubbles. In the next image, the crying child’s back is to the viewer as he hugs Gregory above the shoulders, apparently crying, and Gregory awkwardly hugs him back. In the final image, it is the same hug but flipped, with Gregory’s back facing the viewer as he hugs the crying child around the shoulders. The crying child does not hug him back, his arms limp at his sides and one wide, terrified eye poking above Gregory’s arm to look at the viewer. End ID.]

More Than We Hoped - Ch. 2

Summary: The Daily Bugle drags Spiderman, Tony forces Peter to come up to the compound, and that black haired man packs a punch.

Word count: +6.6k

Warnings: violence, injury, blood, angst...to be honest I think that’s it for this chapter

A/N: OK so I am actually really nervous to put this chapter out. It feels a little different from what I usually do. It felt like the story took on a life of its own, and also...this is all Peter. Y/n is not in this chapter. However, I am gonna have her in the next chapter quite a bit, so hopefully that will make up for it!! Anyways...I hope you enjoy this!

(Oh and this starts off directly after chapter 1!)

series masterlist | main masterlist

——

Still Saturday 

Peter sighed heavily, rubbing his eyes with the hand that wasn’t holding the phone, “Hey, Tony.” 

“Yeah, you’ve already said hello. Got anything else to say?” Tony’s voice deadpanned over the other line. It was sassy, but Peter could tell that he wasn’t necessarily in trouble...yet.

“I just woke up, what else did you want me to say?” Peter said off-handedly. He really wasn’t awake enough to handle where Tony wanted to take this conversation. Plus, he really did not know what was going on.

“I don’t know, you tell me? Why did I wake up this morning to see Spiderman’s name in a trending article from the Daily Bugle?”

“Would you believe me if I said, ‘I don’t know?’” Peter asked.

“Not really, no.” Again, Tony didn’t seem annoyed, but Peter couldn’t help but feel he might be getting a lecture somewhere down the line.

“Honestly, Tony, I haven’t even had time to read the article.” Peter responded evenly.

Tony let out a sigh, “It’s not great, Pete. Whatever you did on patrol last night—they’re spinning it like you lost control, and the guy is in the hospital because of you.”

“What?” Peter said in shock, “Hold on…”

Taking the phone away from his ear, he put Tony on speaker, so he could bring up the article to read.

The same twinge of foreboding that had hit him earlier came back as he read the headline again:

IS HE REALLY OUR FRIENDLY NEIGHBORHOOD SPIDERMAN? Masked Vigilante involved in near lethal apprehension of defenseless substance abuser.

Clicking the article’s link to read more, he was greeted with a photo of his superhero alter ego. The photo showed Spiderman looking like he was being cornered in an alleyway. One of his hands was lifted urging whoever was in front of him to calm down, while the other was gesturing to the heaped form behind him. Anyone looking at it could see it was a body sprawled out on the ground, but the image was such bad quality barely any details were discernible. 

His eyes went quickly to read the beginning of the article:

In the early morning hours last night, distress calls were phoned in by a number of residents of the Bright Valley Apartments. They were alerting authorities of a violent disturbance in the alleyway next to their building between Spiderman and a nondescript man. 

The recorded calls are still not available to the public, but an eyewitness says the man seemed frantic and was lashing out. They said Spiderman struck the man a number of times until the victim was incapacitated. 

When authorities arrived at the scene, Spiderman was still present before webbing his way out of the situation without properly debriefing the authorities that came to the site. It is unclear what the masked vigilante’s intentions were with the victim that has now been identified as Wayne Campbell, who has been known to use drugs. Campbell is now in the hospital with severe internal injuries and is in critical condition.

More was said underneath, but Peter had already seen enough. The feeling of foreboding deepened into a sloshing mess of worry, hurt pride, and a sense of sadness. There was too much misinformation and exploited truths in the first few paragraphs alone for Peter to say it was anything but what it was...

“They-They wrote a slander piece about me…” He said softly, switching the phone back to normal and bringing it up to his ear.

“Looks that way...Sorry, kiddo.” Tony said in a similarly soft tone before continuing, “Know anyone you’ve pissed off lately?”

“No one I can think of,” Peter responded in a sort of mumble after sitting quiet for a moment, thinking.

“Thought you might say that. That’s why I sent Happy to grab you and bring you back to the compound, so we can get to the bottom of this. In the meantime, how about you catch me up on what Spiderman’s been getting up to.”

“What? No—Tony, I can’t just make a trip out to the compound!” Peter exclaimed. 

“Why not?” 

“Because I’ve got...” Peter paused. He felt he was needed here, but with his brain still stuck on the article he didn’t say that. Instead what came out was, “...homework.” He finished, closing his eyes knowing how lame that excuse was.

“Yeah, that hasn’t worked for the last 12 years, not gonna work now.” Tony said matter-of-factly.

Without missing a beat, Peter quipped back, “Technically, I didn’t get to use that excuse for 5 years. So really it’s only been 7.”

“Uncalled for,” Tony said. If they had been in the lab together, Peter could imagine that his mentor would be pointing a wrench at him and raising his eyebrows to emphasize the point that he was hurting the old man. A small smile tugged at the corner of Peter’s mouth at the thought.

“So, you gonna tell me what really happened?” 

The question sobered Peter quickly, making him momentarily forget about going to the compound. He blew air between pursed lips, his cheeks puffing out. “Whatever is happening is so screwed up, Tony…” Peter said quietly.

“It always is.” Tony said this with such sincerity Peter could almost hear the memories coming to life in the retired superheroes head. Tony cleared his throat and spoke up again, “Just start at the beginning.” 

“Yeah, Ok.” Peter breathed out, and he began telling the story of the last 3 nightmarish nights he’d spent patrolling. 

It took 45 minutes before Peter was getting to the details of last night. To his surprise, Tony had let Peter talk without much interruption, only small clarifications here and there and a hum to show he was paying attention.

Once he finally went quiet Tony spoke up, “And you haven’t found any connection between the 3 victims?” 

“Not yet, I haven’t had time—” Peter was cut off by another call coming in. Looking at the contact, he saw it was Happy. He’s seriously making me go to the compound? No questions asked?

Sighing and not hiding his frustration, Peter quickly said “I gotta take this, it’s Happy.” He didn’t wait for a reply before accepting the new call. “Hey, Happy,” he said, adopting a much lighter tone than a second ago.

“Peter, where are you? I’ve been waiting outside for the last 15 minutes.” Happy said in a familiarly gruff greeting.

“Crap, you’re already here? Sorry, Happy. I’ll be right down.” Peter said as he jumped up from his spot on the bed and hung up the phone. He began grabbing at random clothes around the room, hoping they were clean, and throwing them on.

Soon, all that was left for him to do was find his other shoe. Shouldn’t be too hard right? Wrong. He turned over everything. At one point he even stood on the ceiling thinking a new angle would help him—It didn’t. Just as he was starting to get really frustrated, he found it hiding in the corner of his room where he could have sworn he’d looked at least three times before. 

“Ah-ha!” He cheered triumphantly. The victory was short-lived when his phone began to blow up with texts from Happy. Each one getting steadily more grumpy in how they said he needed to get his ass moving and down to the car right now.

So in a chaotic blur of motion, Peter grabbed his lone shoe, his backpack, a granola bar from on top of his mini fridge, and jogged out of his room with only one shoe on.

As he made his way down his hallway, his phone rang for what felt like the thousandth time that morning. He picked it up without looking at the contacts name, and answered, “I know Happy, I’m on my way down right now. Couldn’t find my shoe.”

“See, I keep telling you to put trackers in them, but do you listen?” Came Tony’s amused voice over the other line. 

Even though he had not expected his mentor's voice on the phone, Peter smirked and shot back, “Says the old man that can’t find the wrench that’s still in his hands.”

“That was one time!” Tony’s voice said defensively before changing the subject, “So you haven’t left with Happy yet, I take it?”

“Just getting out to his car.” Peter said, walking into his dorm’s elevator.

“Uh-huh. While, you’re on your way up, try and think through what might be similar to each incident. We’ll use that while going through the info your suit gathered during patrol.”

“Speaking of—Tony, I need to be back by tonight to go patrolling again. I need to be there for the next person that gets affected by this thing.” 

“Yeah, no can do, Underoos.” Tony said. It was said with a casual finality, even off-handed in a way, and it irked Peter for some reason. 

“What do you mean?” He said slightly annoyed as he left the elevator. 

When he neared the door leading outside, he realized he was still not wearing his other shoe having been so distracted by Tony. He put his granola bar in his mouth, and began moving in a way he knew was not even remotely graceful as he tried to keep forward momentum and put his shoe on at the same time.

“There’s too much heat around the situation now, Pete. You need to stay away for awhile.” Tony broke through Peter’s concentration of staying upright as he barreled through the door to the outside.

Once he managed to get the shoe on, Peter paused for a second to take a bite out of his granola bar before moving again. He answered his mentor with a hard tone, “I can’t just drop this, Tony!”

“The media has gotten involved. That automatically makes this trickier. It’s important to tread carefully now.”

“I know I need to be careful,” Peter groaned out, “But I feel really close to a breakthrough! I just need a few more nights of recon. Please—”

“You have any leads?” Tony cut him off before he could keep talking.

Peter faltered before replying. He really didn’t have any leads, and it was clear Tony knew that. He had just hoped that train of thought would work on Tony, and he would be allowed to patrol. “I mean—no, not really.” Peter said quietly, opting for honesty in this moment.

He heard Tony sigh, “We need to be smart. This isn’t a recon-then-action type of mission anymore.”

Peter had made it to the sleek black car that would take him to the compound. Pausing in front of the passenger side, one hand on the door’s handle, Peter started talking, “I know, Tony, but these people—” 

Tony cut him off again, “The answer is still no. We’ll talk more when you get here.” 

The annoyance that had been simmering under Peter’s skin throughout the whole conversation, sparked at that moment. “Fine,” He snapped, and hit the phone’s red ‘End’ button. Opening the car door with a particular amount of aggression, he slid into the seat with a huff. 

Happy immediately began pulling away from the curb as soon as the door shut. A sour silence fell over the two figures, with Peter staying silent and glaring out his window. The other, usually more grumpy, older man glanced at Peter frequently as they made their way upstate. Peter felt the stare each time, knowing the older man was trying to get a read on him as he quietly brooded. 

Over the many years they had been in each other’s lives both had gotten relatively good at reading each other. In this particular situation, it was obvious Peter was frustrated about something, but he knew Happy was trying to piece together what might be annoying him.

“Tony did something again, didn’t he?” Happy’s voice finally broke the silence.

“You could say that,” Peter muttered.

“Whatever he did, I’m sure he has his reasons.” 

Peter had to resist the urge to roll his eyes, Happy didn’t deserve that. “Happy, no offense, but I really don’t want to talk about it.”

“Ok, fair enough.” Happy conceded easily. The rest of the drive was silent, only the soft sounds of music were heard.

When the car rounded the tree lined bend that led up to the compound, Peter’s emotions did a bit of a dance. He always loved seeing this building. It was a symbol of something so much bigger than himself, even bigger than him as Spiderman. Excitement always sparked in his gut as he thought about what and who it held inside and all the inner workings that even he didn’t fully understand yet. The weight of its purpose was inspiring while also being rightfully intimidating. Peter had yet to shake the feelings of being inadequate when thinking about it all. No matter how much he had wanted it, he couldn’t stop wondering if he was good enough to be an Avenger, of being a part of the moving pieces that title gave him power in, and what it meant to protect the world. He was just your friendly neighborhood Spiderman after all.

Today, though, that wash of emotions was dampened by his frustration over why he was here to begin with. He felt like Tony was calling him here to keep an eye on him. Like he didn’t trust him, and it stung.

After the car pulled up to the giant glass doors of the side entrance, Peter said a hasty goodbye to Happy, got out and slammed the door shut a bit harder than necessary. He bounded up to the door, and stepped into the building.

Almost immediately, Friday, Tony’s AI, greeted him with an even tone “Hello, Peter. Should I let Boss know you are here?”

“Tell him I’ll be down in a sec.” Peter answered, but instead of going directly to the lab, he made his way to the large communal kitchen to make himself a sandwich. 

Friday’s voice came through the silence of the kitched “Boss is asking for you to come down to the lab.” The AI paused then added, “He says to just bring the food with you.”

Peter rolled his eyes, Tony knew him a little too well sometimes. Taking a massive bite his sandwich, he grabbed his plate and started his way down to the lab.

When he turned into the large state of the art lab, he was greeted with a view of Tony’s back. 

Since Thanos, Tony had changed from what he had looked like during his active days as Iron Man. It wasn’t for the worse, he had simply changed, gotten older. His hair had gotten distinctly more salt and peppered, even more than when Peter had been remade after the snap. The wrinkles around his eyes had gotten more prominent, and they highlighted the smile he’d started wearing more often now that he was a father and genius mechanic rather than a superhero holding the weight of the world on his shoulders. 

He also had a prosthetic arm, a constant reminder of the day he saved the galaxy. When you could see it, it was a surprisingly tame color—a dark charcoal grey. “You can wear it with anything,” Tony had joked when asked why it wasn’t bright red. It still held Iron Man’s trademark colors of red and gold in its details, with a bright blue light filling out the crevices or other details that the nanotechnology didn’t cover. The scars from the wound that traced their way across his skin came up his neck and stretched up around his ear and cheek. Anything else around his shoulders and chest was usually covered by a shirt, unless he was in his tank top fixing his cars, or swimming at his house in the woods. 

The biggest difference for Peter though, was the softness that had taken over Tony. He was certainly still the cocky, confident man he’d always been, but he didn’t hold himself that way anymore as a suit of armor. Now that confidence was worn as a person slowly working on their monsters and ever so subtly finding hope in who they actually are. It was a softness that came with years of therapy and walking through it all with good friends and family. Peter was proud of Tony for that, and was grateful he got to be a part of it.

Currently, Tony was in a basic long sleeve black shirt pulled back to his elbows and his usual chop-shop jeans that were filled with grease and other stains. 

With his back to the door, he was surrounded by three different holographic projections. One was the schematics and details of Peter’s Spiderman suit. Another was a news feed scrolling and continuously playing any news that might be relevant to his search, and the last one had numbers, graphs, and other data that Peter quickly realized was the data from his suit. 

The suit, while being his, and even his own design, was still hooked up to the main Stark “cloud” that Tony had created for everything that held Stark technology. That meant Tony could bring up anything he wanted from Peter’s suit. 

At any other time, this would have annoyed Peter, maybe even offended him. The two of them had talked at length about the Baby Monitor protocol, and over the last 4 years had slowly lessened it all so that Peter could be his own person, having complete control over the responsibility he had as a superhero. Tony had promised to no longer check the data or videos on his suit unless Peter let him, or asked him to. For this particular moment, even in Peter’s already frustrated state, he knew there had been an unspoken agreement that Tony would help. That meant he would look into these details. So Peter let it slide, and while taking another enormous bite of his sandwich, he walked up to Tony’s side and asked with a mouthful, “Found anything interesting?”

Tony turned his face towards him with both eyebrows raised quietly asking the parental question of ‘really? while eating?’ to which Peter gave a noncommittal shrug to say ‘yup’. Tony lips twitched with amusement, and he turned back to the projections, answering, “No, not yet. Was waiting for you actually.”

Swallowing the bite, Peter said, “I think we should get Friday working on whether or not the three victims have anything in common with each other. Then you and I can look through the surveillance Karen saved through my mask’s camera and see if there is anything we can see for clues or leads.”

Tony nodded, then said, “You heard him, Fri. Start seeing if there is anything to connect these people together, and please upload the videos from Peter’s suit so we can start watching them.

“What time frame do you want to focus on for the videos?” She responded.

“Let’s see, everything starting from Wednesday at the beginning of my patrol to the end of the last entry on Friday,” said Peter.

Friday didn’t respond. Instead, a new hologram popped up in front of the two men, and the first scenes of the surveillance videos began to play. They silently began to watch together while Peter finished his food. 

Three hours later, the pair were now sitting in chairs, eyes slightly glazed from the amount of random footage they had already gone through. Peter tried not thinking about the fact they were still only on Wednesday night. They had fast forwarded through most of the early evening of that night, until right around when Peter remembered it all started. 

When he heard Karen respond to something he said by saying, “You said never to call a night ‘calm’ because it tempts the universe,” he perked up in his chair and spoke out loud, “This is where my senses started going off before I heard the whimpering.”

The suit’s camera showed the vantage point on top of a building looking down at the still busy street below. “Pause the video,” Peter said. Getting up from his chair, he raised his hands to the image. With an outward wave from both hands he expanded the image to be twice the size it was before, essentially engulfing himself and Tony in the scene.

“My senses went off, but I couldn’t see where it was coming from. It was too hard to tell with so many people staring simply because I had swung overhead, but I know someone was staring for another reason.”

Tony looked at him questioningly, “You know when someone is staring at you for another reason?”

Peter nodded and shrugged, “Yeah, there’s a difference in someone staring innocently, and someone that is staring for another reason. I don’t know why, but I can feel the difference.” 

Tony nodded slowly, and his face briefly flashed a ‘huh, neat’ face before he turned back to the image. “Friday, start scanning the faces and see if there are any that stand out. Let’s start with criminal records or anyone that Spiderman has dealt with directly.”

“Certainly.” Friday responded.

In the meantime, both men were staring at the screen seeing if, on intuition and instinct alone, they could pick anything up. After about 2 minutes, Friday spoke, “There are three different faces detected that have misdemeanor records, none of which are connected to Spiderman for their arrest nor their crime.”

The 3 faces showed up with their records next to them, and it was clear right away that none of them were who they were looking for. One had a public indecency charge, another was a DUI, and the last had the only genuine criminal record for assault, but it was from over 20 years ago.

Peter sighed at the news feeling disappointed, while Tony leaned in. “Friday, run the video and see if anyone stays focused on Peter when we know the whimpering started.”

The time between where the clip started and when the whimpering began was only a few seconds and it was impossible to truly focus on the faces with the way the camera whipped in the direction of the whimpering when Peter had heard it. The audio itself didn’t pick up on the whimper—it being too faint for the microphone—but it was clear enough when Peter had heard it. When nothing could be seen, Tony called for the frames to be slowed down to a shuttering frame by frame pace. 

In the blinking frames that could be seen right before Peter’s head moved, only a few people had remained focused on the superhero. An old man who had been tending to his store front, a child staying planted in awe until his parent tugged him along, and a tall slim man with black hair, suit, and...a silver tie.

“Wait!” Peter blurted, “That guy, right there. I recognize him! I saw him last night.”

“Him?” Tony pointed at the blown up image of the man.

“Yeah, he was coming out of the alleyway right before I went to help the last victim.” 

“Friday, you know what that means.” Tony said to his AI.

The silence lasted for only a moment before Friday was speaking to the room, “His name is Everett Mercury, age 25, born and raised in New York City.”

“Ok, can you tell us anything else about him?”

“Actually, boss, his file and any subsequent information that is regularly available or traceable for the average person is coming up blank. This lack of data would normally suggest all information for Mr. Mercury was wiped clean or is purposefully untraceable in most technological databases.”

“Well, I think that means we found our guy, what do you think, Pete?” Tony said, snapping his fingers together and spinning on his heels to look directly at Peter.

Peter gave a small absentminded nod as he only kind of heard Tony’s question. He was still glaring at the face in front of him, thinking. “Is he anywhere near the second location?” 

Again, the silence filled the room until the AI spoke, “Based on my recognition software, there is no record of him being at the location of the second victim.”

Peter groaned,”Dang it!” all though he used entirely more colorful language in his head.

“That doesn’t mean that wanna-be-young-Keanu-Reeves here isn’t our guy.” Tony said lightly.

“No, but it doesn’t confirm it either. Plus, we don’t know anything about him,” Peter shot back.

“They don’t usually make it that easy for us.”

Peter knew Tony wasn’t trying to goad him. He wasn’t even trying to be condescending, but after the week he’d had, the fear of the unknown and the frustration that was just sitting at the bottom of his stomach mixed and boiled quickly. “No they don’t. That doesn’t mean I wasn’t hoping our first lead might have been a little less vague. What are we supposed to do with this information, Tony?” Peter said heatedly, whirling to face his mentor with a glare.

Tony met his stare with raised eyebrows and a slight cock of the head. “I’m sorry, did I miss something?” He looked into Peter’s eyes for a second, “Are you mad at me?”

“How does this help people, Tony? How does me sitting here with you, finding out this guy's name, in upstate New York, help anyone?” Peter said, not answering the question.

“Pete, this is only just the beginning. We’ve only been here—what? 3 hours?” Tony said, checking his watch.

“Yeah, and by the time I get back someone might already be infected by whatever-the-hell this is and could even be dead!”

Understanding washed over Tony’s features at Peter’s words. “You’re upset I said you couldn’t go patrolling.” It wasn’t a question. He had said it as its own confirmation.

“Have you watched any of these videos, Tony?” Peter said with quiet intensity pointing back at the projected image, “New York needs someone out there protecting them, and right now, no one is.”

Tony remained silent as he looked intently at Peter for a moment, his lips pushed up in thought. When he finally looked away, he gave a heavy sigh, and his hands came up in a loose shrug before he said, “Ok. You want to go out and patrol. Then I won’t stop you.”

“What?” Peter said slightly shocked, “You’re gonna let me go?” He was not expecting that reaction. He thought he would need to put up a fight, argue a bit more. Even then, he didn’t think Tony was going to allow him to go. 

“Yeah. You want to patrol. I won’t stop you.” Tony said lightly.

Peter looked at Tony for a second, hesitating. His brows furrowed as he searched the man’s face. Something about Tony’s reaction bothered him, but he couldn’t think why. Why was that so easy? The thought was momentary, a sparked instinct to push for more information, but as soon as it came, it was swallowed up by the new thoughts of getting back to the city. If he could patrol, maybe he could do better reconnaissance, maybe even find the black haired man himself and question him.

“Uh, right.” Peter breathed out, “Then I’m gonna go.” He turned and started to leave the lab. Right when he got to the door, he looked back and saw Tony had already turned his back on him and was looking at each screen he had pulled up. He had started playing the frame-by-frame video again. His arms were crossed, and it was clear he was thinking and assessing everything he saw. Again, something in the back of Peter’s head told him he should stay, but he pushed it back stubbornly. 

A couple hours later found Peter atop the lone skyscraper on campus. It was a massive clock tower that used to ring every hour with a real bell, but it had since been turned electronic, telling the time silently as it watched the students wander below. On nights when he needed to just think Peter would find himself up here, especially when he couldn’t be bothered making it to his usual favorite perches closer to the center of the city. Tonight, Peter was watching dusk settle over the city, thinking of a game plan for the night’s patrol.

Somehow, the other incidents had happened right where he was, no need to search far and wide. That left Peter with little direction as to where to start, but he still had to get moving. The shadows were growing, and that meant more alleys to hide in and go unnoticed. 

Standing up, he shook himself loose, and flicked out his hand. His two middle fingers came to the base of his palm, tapping his web shooter to life. It responded with a string of web flying over to the next building, and just as Peter stepped off the tower, he spoke to his AI, “Karen, I want you to monitor for raised temperatures, and scan every face you can for Everett Mercury. Let’s make tonight worth it.” 

“Initiating scanning parameters.” Karen confirmed.

As Peter swung, he felt his senses open up and his nerves coil like springs. The anticipation he held for finding another victim was growing, and he hated how afraid he was. It wasn’t just the fear of these people getting hurt. Frankly, that he could deal with. He’s had to deal with it. It was a responsibility of a superhero to deal with the fear of people getting hurt. No, he was afraid of seeing the side effects of this thing again. The glowing eyes, the pulsing veins, the shrill cry that comes with each victim—it was haunting. He was also afraid of holding another person in his arms as they fought whatever it was they were affected by. He didn’t know how many more people he could watch seize and drop into a comatose state. 

He was uneasy, and he felt a little ashamed this thing had dug its claws into him so quickly, but the apprehension he didn’t want was still there all the same. With each flick of his wrist that carried him farther into the city, he tried to think of a way to turn that fear in his favor, but all he came up with was a sour and shaky form of adrenaline. 

Much later into the night, Karen’s voice came out clear in Peter’s ear,“My scans show a man that fits the description of Everett Mercury by the ATM’s on the corner.” 

Peter swung to the nearest rooftop, and upon crouching and turning around to look out at the four-way intersection he felt his senses buzz lightly. That annoying warning was back, and his skin crawled at the feeling. He spoke quietly to his AI, “Where is he?”

Before Karen could answer, Peter’s eyes found a black haired figure in a sharp suit standing motionless at the corner. When Peter found his eyes, he felt his stomach do a flip. The man was staring straight at him, unflinching and unfazed as their eyes met. His eyes were cold and dark, set within a face of stone. Each second felt stretched in time as Peter looked at him. He stood expectantly, like he had known Spiderman would be there, looking for him. As if to confirm the suspicion, a small smirk began to play itself on Mercury’s lips before he broke eye contact, turned and in a few steps, seemed to vanish into thin air.

“What? What was that?” Peter whispered harshly as he stared wide eyed at nothing, “no no no no!” 

In a panic, he shot out a web, and launched himself down to the other side of the intersection. As he landed lightly on his feet where Mercury had been standing, he looked in all directions only to catch a glimpse of the dark suited figure slipping down a darkened road at the end of the street. Peter sprinted in that direction, and when he turned the corner he was met with more empty space. 

What the hell?!

Scanning the area, Peter saw that he had run into a large empty courtyard. It was rundown, with pipes coming out haphazardly from the walls, concrete benches spotted the outskirts of the central space where the ground had broken and the cracks were growing grass and weeds. It was lit by a solitary orange street light that shone weakly at the entrance making shadows fall over the far side and its corners turn black. 

As Peter squinted in the direction of those shadows, he saw a flash of movement in the corner of his eye. Flicking a web in the direction of the movement, he knew he had caught nothing as it hit a pipe with a hard hollow sound. 

He jerked his head in the direction of the movement, and felt his body crouch instinctively, muscles tightening, ready to launch into motion. 

Another glimpse of movement, and another web that hit nothing. 

“I know you're in here!” Peter spoke out into the courtyard. Still crouched with fists clenched, he felt his heart hammering in his chest, and adrenaline coursing through his body.

Peter tried to hone in on his spidey senses hoping to locate the man that way. He felt the familiar buzzing at the back of his head, but the warning felt like it was coming from more than one direction. There was nowhere that didn’t feel threatening, and his mind began to go fuzzy the longer he tried to focus on it. It was like white noise slowly getting louder as the threat started to close in like walls.

In the fog taking over his brain, Peter didn’t notice the air shimmering a few feet in front of him until Everett Mercury had materialized in front of him. The man stood towering over Peter’s crouched figure, a smirk still on his face. 

As quickly as he had appeared, his body crouched and shot out a hand which connected with Peter’s sternum and sent him flying into the wall behind him. After the hit landed, he vanished into the darkness again.

A voice, low and smooth came from the dark, “I’m not the one you should be focusing on, Spiderman.”

The impact had knocked the wind from Peter’s lungs, and he slipped to the ground on all fours coughing. He tried to right his breathing quickly as he scrambled up and got into a ready stance again, saying breathily, “Oh, yeah? And your cloak and dagger thing is what, a party trick? Doesn’t exactly convince me you’re a good guy.”

Peter didn’t get an answer. Mercury appeared at his side and shoved him hard enough to make Peter stumble towards the center of the open space. Peter tried to correct his balance and figure out where his opponent might be coming from, but there was nothing but mental static.

“It’s not about me being good or bad. I just follow orders. You on the other hand...What are you doing to save all those helpless people?” The disembodied voice spoke casually. It sounded like it was circling the perimeter of the yard. “You’re wasting time, Spidey.” 

Peter knew he was being baited, but that didn’t stop a spark of fear and anger to go through him at the thought of more victims. Fuck, please be bluffing.

“Why are you doing this?” Peter growled, trying to stay focused on the task at hand.

“Why am I doing this?” The voice answered, amusement laced its deep tone, “I’m not doing anything. They seek us out.”

With the white noise still muffling his senses, Peter didn’t notice Mercury come up behind him until he was whispering in his ear, “They ask for it.”

Peter whirled around to see Mercury standing right in front of him. With a knee-jerk reaction, Peter shot out his fist, but he hit nothing as Mercury smoothly ducked out of the way. Peter pivoted to counter the dodge, but the dark haired man’s eyes flashed with an intensity that charged the air. It felt like the split second between when a fuse runs its course and the firework finally erupts. Except, Peter wasn’t ready for the explosion. 

Mercury lunged forward, and swung his fists at Peter. First a straight cross, then an upper cut, then another jab. Mercury’s fists were flying, and each hit was made with a trained precision. The ferocity of the attack caught Peter off guard, and each blow was thrown with such brutal speed and power that he felt defenseless against them as they slowly pushed him backwards towards the wall.

Finally, a particularly harsh punch came and hit his face. Peter’s body gave him no choice but to drop to the ground dazed. He felt warm blood flow from his nose, and in the back of his head he guessed his nose might have been broken. 

The other man, barely breathing heavy, stalked closer to Peter’s hunched figure, and mumbled something under his breath that Peter didn’t catch over the ringing in his ears. Then he picked Peter up by his shoulders and slammed him into a mess of pipes jutting from the wall behind him. A loud crack sounded, and pain radiated through Peter’s ribs as one of them broke on impact. His head rocked back into a lead pipe, and he felt the edge of yet another pipe’s broken opening cut into his skin because of the sheer force he was being pressed into it. Weakly, he tried and failed to squirm out of the other man’s grasp. 

Mercury glared into Peter’s masked face and spoke in a low menacing voice, “You might not believe this, but what’s happening is for the better.” He looked between the two bright white eyes with cold intensity and growled, “Don’t fight this.” 

He let go of Peter, who immediately slumped to the ground, and stepped back. Shadow engulfed Mercury’s figure once more, and he was gone.

Peter sat on the ground, clutching his torso, and trying to breath through the pain that was currently coursing through his body. It had been a while since he had been beaten up this badly, or been so taken by surprise. Why wouldn’t my spidey sense work? His pain addled brain couldn’t think of a reason just yet, and his main priority needed to be getting back to the dorms. 

“Hey Karen, how far are we from campus?” Peter whispered out.

“You are currently 2 miles away.” The AI responded.

“Great,” He said a little high pitched, “I can do that. No problem.”

Shakily, he stood up and raised his arm to shoot out a web. The broken rib screamed in protest, but gritting his teeth against the pain, Peter shot and pulled himself into the air. 

He must have blacked out as he swung back because Peter would not have been able to tell anyone how he managed to make it back to his dorm room that night. All he remembered was waking up on the floor during the very early hours of the day with Ned shaking him awake.

“Pete. Peter! You gotta wake up!” Ned’s voice was full of worry. 

He groaned as his friend continued shaking him. He reached up his hand and swatted clumsily at the arm connected to the hand shaking his shoulder.

“Oh, thank god,” Ned sighed, “Dude, you’re a fucking mess. What the hell did you do tonight?”

Peter couldn’t form coherent thoughts just yet with the pain and disorientation his injuries were causing him, and just mumbled, “Patrol.”

“Yeah, figured that much out myself. I meant what happened to you?”

“Everett Mercury.” Peter said briefly, still trying to stop the spinning in his head.

“Whose that?” Ned asked curiously.

Just then, Peter’s phone began ringing and buzzing on his desk. Ned reached over Peter’s head and handed it to him. The screen’s brightness bit into Peter’s eyes and he flinched while making out the series of texts coming in from Tony.

Tony: We need to talk.

Tony: Mercury is enhanced and highly dangerous.

Tony: Do not engage with him. We need to make a plan

Too late, Tony... Peter thought as he felt each injury pulse in time with his heart.

There’s chapter 2! Please let me know any feedback you might have! I’d love to know if there are things you are hoping to see, or if you have any thoughts about the story in general. All reblogs are so incredibly appreciated! 💙❤️

Taglist (Let me know if you want to be added)

@cocoamoonmalfoy @empath-bunny @storybookholland @kassey @touchmethomas @greenorangevioletgrass @emilyparkerholland​

Naegami week day 2 photograph

Byakuya walked down into the trash room, "Makoto?!" he yelled out to be echoed back. He sighed starting to turn around before he heard movement. He snapped his head around to see garbage moving a bit, "what in the world?" he grumbled before taking a broken rusty pipe and moving over to it, he gently poked it pushing some trash aside. Makoto gasped out as he was freed and above the trash, it was enough to cause Byakuya to let out a scream. "ah! Thank goodness you came! I thought I'd suffocate under there!" he said looking to the other. "what were you doing under there in the first place?!" he yelled looking at the luckster. "I saw something here and I found this!" he brought up a rather decent quality camera from the trash, "a camera?" Byakuya asked squinting at it. "yeah! I heard from Monokuma that he got rid of some of the past upper classmen's things and threw them out here and I wanted to see who's was here and if they could still be used!" Makoto explained standing up from the trash, "just my luck that I got stuck under a lot of trash though." he giggled a bit looking to Byakuya, "wanna take a picture together?" Makoto asked messing a bit with the camera in an attempt to turn if on. The camera luckily still had quite a bit of power left in it despite who knows how long of being in the trash and out of use. "right here and now?" Byakuya asked looking to him a bit confused, "yeah! What do you say?" Makoto looked at him grinning, "to make some memories for ourselves in the future!" he said moving closer, Byakuya nodded a bit. "couldn't hurt I suppose." Makoto grinned handing Byakuya the camera, "can you take the picture your arms are longer than mine." he nodded, "yes since you did find this to do so." he said moving the camera away from them and his finger on the flash, "1! 2! 3! Shoot!" Makoto yelled jumping up using Byakuya as a support to stay on the same level as him.

Flash!

Byakuya stumbled a bit on himself as Makoto completely lost his balance and slipped and fell, "dear lord are you OK?" he asked looking at the other, "yeah! Just slipped is all." Byakuya sighed a bit offering the other his hand, Makoto took it quickly getting pulled up back to his feet. "how'd the picture turn out?" he asked looking to the camera still in Byakuya's hands, "might as well check." he snarked a bit turning the camera around, it's screen being cracked in a myriad of places. The two of them struggled a bit to find it but they made it to look at the picture they took, it didn't look that bad despite the screen being cracked to the point it distorted the image slightly. "hey it's pretty nice!" Makoto grinned ear to ear looking to Byakuya, "yeah I suppose so. Even with the broken screen it isn't that bad." he said handing the camera back, the luckster only beamed. "let's take this to the others! And take pictures with them too! It'll be great!" he yelled skipping along taking Byakuya with him by the hand, the other only chuckled a bit at the other's near contagious energy.

Byakuya to the memory chip out of the busted old camera and put it into his computer, a few of the images were ones done by someone else. He moved those to a different file, he'd find whoever the camera belonged to previously and give them their pictures back. He than looked to the pictures that he and Makoto had made, they both made pictures as Makoto insisted that they both make pictures of their own to make memories. Byakuya smiled at the first, his face was in a moment of shock while Makoto was full of energy jumping up, the picture was slightly blurred from their motion but it was still clear. The trash and grime on Makoto's clothes was still oh so very obvious, a few wrappers stuck to his clothes and a ramen cup stuck on his head. He felt himself smile more at it, "it was pretty nice. Even now that it isn't distorted." he clicked through to a few more pictures, one was taken by Toko upon their request to catch the class seeing Aoi make one of her biggest leaps of her career, another was one with most of the remaining class in the lunch room and other roles of fallen classmates being played by trash made copies of them or alter ego. He couldn't help but smile from the pictures, than he found something he didn't notice before: their pre killing game class photo. He mustn't of noticed that the previous owner had taken it as if was of his class regardless, he looked at it closely everyone was there and nothing was wrong. He brushed off his nerves, "excuse me mister Togami, Koizumi Mahiru is here to speak with you." he turned to one of his employees, "let her in." he said waving a hand at them dismissably, "yes sir." he turned back to the screen and pulled up the file of pictures that weren't his and transferred them to the memory card again. "hello? I got a call to come here and-" "I know that I called you and why." he interrupted her taking out the memory card and taking the camera. "I wanted to return your property after using it and learning that you were still alive." he said passing her the old busted up camera and it's strangely fine memory card. "oh well thank you! I'm glad to have these back for sentimental value, after all this camera can't be used at all." Mahiru said taking them smiling, "the camera was still functional when I had it." Byakuya sighed moving back to his computer. "well yes and no. Yes it can still take pictures but no it can't do much else and it barely has any battery life anymore." she explained putting the memory card in her bag, "still I'm glad to have it back regardless." she said putting the camera in her bag. "great. May I ask how you print photographs? The former ultimate photographer should know such a thing right?" he asked looking to her, Mahiru only smiled and nodded. "of course! I can print them out for you for a bit of money since this is coming out of time I'm working." "state your price and I'll pay double."

Byakuya set up the frame on his desk in his office and smiled at it, just him and Makoto in their youth. Them getting the chance to be young again in such a disastrous mess, "I am glad you asked for a picture." he carresed Makoto's end of the picture as he smiled at it.

euphoria // vampire!jungkook

pairing: vampire!jeon jeongguk x human!reader

summary: you’re scared of vampires - until one saves your life one night.

word count: 1988 + 1808 + 2373 + 1798 + 1046 + 2113 + 1646

chapters: prologue / chapter 1 / chapter 2 / chapter 3 / chapter 4 / chapter 5 / chapter 6 / chapter 7 / epilogue

When you regain consciousness, you’re lying on a soft surface.

"Y/N," a male voice murmurs, tinged with desperation, "Y/N, come on, please, you have to wake up." Your head is propped up, probably on someone's lap, and shaking fingers comb through your messy hair.  "Jin, she's not going to die, right? Please tell me she's going to make it.  She has to." Die? You realize that you have no idea where you are, and you have no recollection of what happened and how you got there.  For some reason, your eyes won’t open, but you’re secretly grateful – a part of your hazy mind has managed to figure out that it’s Jeongguk’s lap you’re lying on.  He has nice thighs, you think distantly. "I don’t know, Jeongguk.  I’m sorry." Seokjin’s voice is strained.  "It’s been  long time since I’ve used so much magic in one go.  This is precisely why I’m a vet, not a surgeon.  Healing spells on humans take up a lot of energy, and I've never had to heal injuries so serious before." "She almost died, Jin! I don’t know how I’d live with myself if she died because I was too late." The young vampire sounds like he’s close to tears.  "I should’ve started following her after we tracked down that damned leech. I put her in so much danger, I-"

"It’s not your fault, Jeongguk." The witch’s words are quiet and reassuring.  "It could’ve happened to anyone, not just Y/N."

"Yeah, but it happened to Y/N!"Jeongguk protests.

You finally muster the energy to open your eyes. "What happened?" Your voice is disgustingly raspy, but your throat hurts, and you don’t know why. Seokjin smiles, relief clear in his eyes.  "Oh good, you’re awake!" His eyes promptly roll into the back of his eyes and he collapses neatly onto the couch behind him. "Oh gosh,” you say, eyebrows furrowing in alarm, “is he okay?" Jeongguk looks down at you.  "Y/N, you almost died, and you’re asking him if he’s alright?" He shakes his head with a smile that is both fond and awed.  "You really are one of a kind, Y/N." You frown up at him.  "But I can't remember what happened..." "You were attacked, Y/N." You think long and hard, and everything seems to fall into place, pieces in a jigsaw puzzle made of memories finally clicking together.  You were going home from work when you felt like you were being followed.  With your luck, you were – by a vampire, by the haunted look on Jeongguk’s face.

That's as far as your faulty memory goes.

"After you fell asleep yesterday morning, Jin and I spent the day trying to track down whoever turned me.  He’s surprisingly good with advanced tracking spells.  I found out I wasn’t the only person they turned – apparently, they have a fetish for young adults walking alone at night." It does make a little sense, but you don’t tell him out loud. "I had to get justice. Not just for myself, but for everyone who was forcefully drained and turned because of that guy." Jeongguk sighs in frustration, raking a hand through his hair.  "We never could've guessed he'd go after you next."

"But I'm alive." you point out.  "If that vampire is as dangerous as you said, how am I still around?" Granted, you don't remember enough to tell the tale, but you know for sure that your heart is still beating in your chest.  "I'm still human."

"That's because Jin and I intervened.  I fought the vampire while Jin got you back here to heal you.  I have to admit, that's the most I've ever been injured in a fight." He smiles shyly.  "The sound of your heart beating made it all worth it, though." He puffs out his chest.  "I never lose."

You pat his cheek affectionately.  "My hero.  You saved my life again." It still hurts to talk, and you still feel a little woozy.

Jeongguk melts into a bumbling and stammering mess in front of you eyes.  It's cute, how flustered he is.  "I just did what I thought was right.  But honestly, I'm not too sure." A haunted look seeps into his blue eyes.  "I killed someone, Y/N.  Granted, he was already dead, but I've never been conscious and angry enough to kill.  You were unconscious for three days because I found you too late."

You try to sit up, but your weakened body betrays you and you find yourself falling back onto him.  "Gukkie, there's no need to beat yourself up about this.  You did the right thing.  Killing a killer doesn't change the number of killers in the world, but it weren't for you, I wouldn't be alive right now.  If it weren't for you, so many more kids would've missed out on the chance to live their lives."

Jeongguk sniffles, and you can feel the guilt rolling off him in waves.  "I don't deserve to be called your hero, because I'm not a hero.  I killed someone, Y/N! Even when I'm on the verge of dying of thirst and I'm desperate for blood, I try not to kill.  But I just killed someone with my bare hands because I wanted to." He looks at you with an expression akin to wonder.  "How can you still stand to be around me? I'm a monster.  It's in my nature."

He angrily wipes away a tear.  "I killed someone the first time we met, and that was because he was a pervert and a creep and he deserved it.  But when I came to you to apologize, I scared you! But you forgave me, and you wanted to be my friend, and nobody's ever wanted that from me for a long time, and-"

His voice breaks.  "I don't deserve you, but I think I'm in love with you, and I don't know what to do."

Your world screeches to a halt.  Jeongguk is in love with you?

You need some time to think.

"I need a shower," you say instead, stumbling off the bed.  You grab a clean pair of shorts and a shirt out of your drawer.

Jeongguk nods, looking a little dejected.  "Okay." His voice is small and sad, and it breaks your heart to hear it.

However, in the shower, you do take the time to think - about everything that just happened, really.  There are two dots on your neck with a line running across it, a pale welt rising above your skin.  Even though Seokjin healed you enough for you to recover and you can cover it up with makeup, the scar can never fade: a mark on your skin, a gap in your memory.

It doesn't hurt, not even when you step into the warm water.  It just feels... numb.

But a part of you heats up at the thought of Jeongguk - he's in love with you, but do you love him the same way? You know you like him for his physical aspects (you'd let him choke you with his thick thighs without hesitation), but being in love with him is a whole different thing.

You think about the list of qualities you want in your dream man: physically, he has to be strong, fit, taller than you, preferably a cute smile (and dimples!) matched with a deep voice; mentally either smart, artsy or both, passionate about his work and his hobbies.

You think about Jeongguk, and all the times he's spent with you.  He's strong - strong enough to pull a perfectly-fine door right off it's hinges by accident (it happened to the fridge door, when Jin started asking you questions you pulled a Jeongguk and turned evasive).  He's fit, too.  Thighs! Your mind squeaks.  He's taller than you, but not by too much.  He's tall enough for you to tilt your head up to talk to him, but you'd be taller than him if you wore heels.  He's hot, but also cute - when he grins, his bunny teeth poke out of his mouth, a little dot of a dimple carved in a cheek.  His voice isn't low, like Taehyung's, but it's low enough for a pleasant shiver to race down your spine, like when he bit you.

He's smart and artsy - when he saw you working on a composition project for your music class, you'd happily taught him how to work the digital instruments.  By the end of the night, he'd already mastered it, much to your amazement.  He was passionate, too, about everything he did.  I'm not gonna lose, you remember him saying while both of you were playing Mario Kart.  He'd beat Jin's high score, and next time Jin played, he'd been confused, wondering when he'd beat his own high score.

You think about what makes you happy, and when you do, your mind creates an image of Jeongguk grinning at you.

You hear your heart go ba-DUMP in your chest.

Oh, you realize, maybe I am in love with him too.

The realization is shocking enough for you to drop your soap on your foot.

"I'm in love with Jeongguk," you say quietly to yourself, hoping the sound of water droplets hitting the floor covers the sound of your voice.  Acknowledging the fact that you're in love with the vampire doesn't actually sound so bad.

Your foot, on the other hand...

Day 3: Office/Locked in a closet

Warning ❗❗

NSFW🔞

🔹Art by: @nane-hen✨

Complete image in the next links: 

Nane’s Twitter ---->https://twitter.com/NanesaurusRex/status/1284249476140544002 

Full Image ---->https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EdKRusHXYAMkcLJ?format=jpg&name=4096x4096

Context of the image under the “Keep Reading”.  (Warnings: NSFW and really long xd ) 

It had been a week since “the bed incident” happened. And neither did Kyle or Cartman talked about it. They just went on with their day, closed the deal and returned home. 

“Yeah, Kyle totally needed my help in that conversation. He couldn’t have done it without me!” Cartman gloated to their new inter, Butters, who looked at him amazed. 

“That is bullshit and you know it, Cartman!” shouted Kyle from across the office. 

Oh yes, they were back to their routine. And they were fine with it. It was their thing. Unfortunately, Stan and Kenny were done with it. 

They noticed something had changed since the trip to New York. For everyone, it might seem like Kyle and Eric hate each other, always competing, always getting on each other’s nerves and always fighting; but for them, it seemed they have some unresolved issues that they needed to work out. 

And they would make that happen. 

It was a nice Thursday afternoon. Everyone was getting ready to go home, just wrapping the last things for the day.

“Hey, man!” Said a cheerful Kenny to a somewhat tired Cartman. He didn’t give him time to answer when immediately said “Listen, I need a favor. You know how Stan likes to use those fancy cardboards for important meetings? Well, I am prohibited going anywhere near the since last week incident so… Can you go? I really need them in my desk for tomorrow morning and you know they don’t open it until 8 a.m.” 

“Are you serious?” Asked an annoyed Eric. “Yeah. But you need to go now, because they close in 10 minutes.” Kenny pushed him towards the elevator. “Why can’t Broflovski or the intern can’t do it?” 

“I am taking Butters home and we really have to get going, something about getting in trouble if he isn’t home by a certain hour. And Kyle is working with Stan so you are the only one around.” The blonde pushed his coworker inside the elevator. “Thank you so much! I owe you one!” Kenny told him right before the elevator doors closed.

Cartman rolled his eyes. “Whatever.” 

When he arrived to the storage room he noticed no one was there. But the room wasn’t closed so he didn’t mind. 

Not three minutes after, a really annoyed redhead got himself inside the storage room. “Stupid Stan.. having to do everything around here.” He muttered to himself. Or so he thought. 

Brown and blue eyes met with green ones. “What are you doing here?” They asked in unison.

“I work here, dumbass. Same as you.” Answer Cartman. 

“I know that, idiot. I mean, why are you here. You don’t usually come to get your stuff, you normally send Stotch.” Kyle frowned. 

“I am doing this as a favor.” He showed him the cardboards. Kyle nodded. 

“Hey, can you pass me two of those cardboards? Stan needs them as well, apparently.” 

“What are the magic words, Kyle?” Teased Cartman. Kyle grumbled a barely audible. “Please.” 

Eric smirked but before he could reach the cardboards, he felt his fingers touching another thing. “What the-” He grabbed it. 

“What is it?” Asked Kyle. “Come on. Let’s get out of here.” 

Cartman showed Kyle a brand new wine bottle. They both were surprised. 

“What was that doing there?” Kyle took it. “Is this were Kenny keeps his stash?” 

“If so, he keeps really weird things.” Cartman said showing him a lube bottle as well. 

Then, they heard it. “Click.” 

Both looked at the door and immediately recognised that noise. “Did someone just locked us in?!” Cartman asked. 

Kyle approached the door and tried to push it open. “Oh my God! They did!” 

Both men started shouting for someone to get them out of there. But nobody came. 

“God damnit! Just what I fucking needed!” Whined Eric while taking his phone out. But… “Oh, you have yo be fucking kidding me!” Dead. His phone was dead. 

Meanwhile, Kyle was hoping for his phone to have battery. “Yes” He whispered to himself… But! “Oh! So Stan can pay for high quality cardboard but can’t afford a decent internet company!” The “no signal” sign in his phone almost mocking him.

He threw his phone who knows where and began moving the door handle aggressively. When he found out that was taking him nowhere he began charging against the door. “Come on, Cartman! If you help me we can take it down!” Kyle took his coat and folded it neatly beside him.  

Eric rolled his eyes. “We can’t take it down. Remember how last month someone was stealing supplies and Stan asked for the doors to be reinforced?” He chuckled at Kyle’s desperate expression. “Even with my strength it won’t budge.” 

“Well, I don’t see you giving any ideas as to how we are getting out of here!” The smaller man tried looking for something - anything - that helped them. 

Cartman just got himself comfortable, leaving his coat and tie on one of the racks. “Is not like we will be here all night.”

Kyle grumbled and tried to put as much space as he could between him and his enemy. Which wasn’t much considering the pretty small size of the room. “This is all your fault.” He muttered. 

“How the fuck is this my fault?! I wasn’t the one who got us trapped here!” He stood a bit closer to him, confronting him. Kyle didn’t stand behind. He got closer too. Green and blue-brown eyes furiously met. 

“It’s always you! The messed up hotel reservation? You. Yesterday’s missed deal with that corporation? You. Us getting trapped in here and making me miss a date? You! It has always been you! The fucking Cartman Effect!” He pushed him with enough force to make him stager a bit. 

Cartman reacted immediately and pushed him against the door. 

That disoriented Kyle for a moment. 

“Listen to me. I am so fucking tired of your bullshit.” His arms were on both sides of Kyle’s head. His serious expression was one that Kyle has never seen before. His bi-colored eyes glinted with something Kyle couldn’t put his finger on. “You say everything is my fault. You aren’t the only one who got things to do tonight!” Eric was really close. 

I can smell his cologne. Kyle thought.

He was sure Eric was telling him something about how any of this was his fault. And Kyle knew that. He was just… tired. And annoyed with whoever got them in this situation. It’s not that he hated the idea of being trapped, he hated the idea of being trapped with Eric. But not because they were supposed to be enemies. This was something else and his body seemed to agree with him. 

Eric could see that Kyle was not listening to him anymore. His eyes seemed more interested in the way Cartman looked. 

Eric didn’t even know what he was talking about. He got lost as well in his coworkers factions. 

Just like that day at the hotel. And with this thought he got his lips closer to Kyle’s. 

The smaller man seemed to notice where this was going. He let out a small noise and moved his face away from Cartman’s. “We can’t…” He whispered. 

“Why?” Asked the brunette in that deep voice that made Kyle go weak on his knees. “We are coworkers, we are still at the office and…” It was difficult trying to look at his enemy in the eyes. “We are supposed to hate each other.” Cartman stare at him for a moment. He smirked. “You sure about that? Your body seems to be thinking otherwise.” Kyle face went red with embarrassment. 

“It’s not what-” He tried to hide it. Tried. “You don’t have to worry about it.” He whispered in his ear. “I can even help you with your problem.” 

“Don’t say such stupid things!” Kyle stuttered. His mind a bit foggy for all the sensual tension trapped with them.  

Eric hummed. “Then pushed me away.” This surprised Kyle. Cartman continued. “If you don’t want this to happen… just tell me.” 

Cartman knew. He knew if Kyle didn’t want any of this he would have pushed him away. He also knew that Kyle was everything but weak. He really didn’t want to push him away. And he didn’t do it either. 

“I wonder…” His right hand found his way to the back of the redhead’s neck. “If I kiss you right now. Would you kiss me back?” 

Kyle could already feel Cartman’s breath against his cheek. He was getting closer. His noses were almost touching. He couldn’t stop this. He couldn’t stop Cartman. He couldn’t stop himself. 

“I didn’t think so.” Was Eric’s final statement before finally kissing him. 

Kyle couldn’t stop the hard beating of his heart. He was sure that it was gonna get out of his chest if this continued. But Cartman was right. He didn’t want any of this to stop. He didn’t want Eric to stop. He had to stop lying to himself. 

At first, Kyle didn’t move at all. He just let Eric do whatever he wanted, he dominated that kiss. But short after, he was kissing him back. 

It was a passionate kiss. Full of desire, full of untold feelings that begged to be let out. 

Kyle rounded Eric’s neck with his arms. He needed to feel him closer. The other man, by instinct, placed his hands on Kyle’s hips. The smaller man could feel Eric’s hands slowly massaging that spot. He felt in heaven and he couldn’t help the small moan that escaped his lips.   

That was such a turn on for Cartman. He decided immediately that he needed to hear that sound again. And again. And again. 

Kyle didn’t feel any shame this time. He felt alive. And he wanted to keep going all the way to the end. He need it. 

They only stop for brief moments to breath, but they were back at it right away. The kiss even more heated than before. They didn’t even know when their tongues started to be a part if their kiss. 

Kyle could feel his hands wanting to explore even more of his enemy. He could feel the white shirt that was getting in between. He wanted that gone. He unbuttoned his shirt as fast as he could, his hands were shaking but he got it off of him. 

Eric didn’t want to stay behind. His hands leaving Kyle’s waist and going directly to his, now very noticeable, hard-on. That got him another moan from him. 

Almost as in queue, Eric didn’t want to waste anymore time, so in a swift movement he got Kyle out of his pants and boxers. 

The red of Kyle’s cheeks could compare to the red of his hair. And Cartman noticed it.

He took the time to admire his half-naked lover. God, how many times has he craved this sight. He chuckled. “I always knew you had red hair down there too.” Kyle couldn’t help but frown at that comment. Was he seriously making this joke right now? 

“You son of a-” The insult died in his lips as Eric kissed him once again. There was something sexy in the redhead yelling at him. Or that’s what Cartman thought. 

He left his lips and nibbled his pale neck. Meanwhile, he took his own pants and boxers, his bottom half finally getting some relief. Without hesitation, we grabbed both their members and began moving his hand up and down softly. His other hand was on Kyle’s neck, bringing his lips together. 

His movements were fast at times and Kyle’s sounds of pleasure were telling him that everything he was doing was right. But he didn’t want their fun to end anytime soon so at some point he stopped. 

“Don’t stop… please…” Kyle begged. His hips looking for any kind of friction. 

Cartman gave him a brief kiss. “Relax, I am just looking for the lube.” He caressed his cheek. “This isn’t even close to be over.” 

“That won’t be necessary.” Kyle didn’t  seemed to think twice about it when he dropped to his knees. And for the first time in the night, Eric was surprised. But he didn’t object about it. 

“Well.” He smirked. “This is a nice surprise. If you think you can handle thi-” Now it was Eric’s turn to shut up as Kyle took a hold of his member and began to suck. 

Eric groaned at the delicious sensation of Kyle’s mouth and tongue. Where the fuck did he learned that? He thought as his lover took him even deeper. God, Cartman could die right there and he would be the luckiest guy in hell. 

The pleasure was overwhelming, he didn’t want to finish yet. Not in Kyle’s mouth. His hands grabbed a full of the smaller man’s hair and guided his movements so it was a good rhythm for both of them. 

Kyle took him out of his mouth and took a breath. His hand replacing his mouth. “I think this is a better option than lube anyway.” His voice was a bit raspy, but it was worth it. “Now come here and fuck me.” 

Cartman didn’t need to be told twice. He brought his lips to Kyle’s again and found himself between the other man’s legs. 

This was it. Every moment they have spent together was guiding them to this. Since the moment he they got this job, their first fight, their constant competition, that night at the hotel, all that sensual tension that drown the office whenever those two were close to each other. It was all leading them here. And nothing was stopping them. 

Neither of them could wait anymore. They needed it now. But Cartman didn’t want to hurt his partner, although Kyle seemed confident. He looked at those vibrant green eyes, they were clouded with lust. So, why keep him waiting? 

He entered him. It was slow but steady. He didn’t stop until he was all the way in him. 

It was painful. Of course it was. But Kyle didn’t want it to stop. Cartman noticed the pained expression on his lover’s face and went still. “You ok there, Kyle?” He said while trying to control his want to just thrust into him. 

“Yeah… Just… give me a second.” Kyle was trying to calm his breathing while accommodating Cartman’s huge- “Ok, I am ready. Just… not so fast. Yet.”

Eric nodded. His hips moved slowly at first. The moans that left Kyle’s mouth were music to his ears. 

As the redhead started to move himself in sync with Eric’s thrust, he knew they were ready for something a bit more… aggressive. 

Eric didn’t stop, but he hooked the back of Kyle’s legs with his arms. He got even closer to his lover. They were almost chest to chest. 

With a hard thrust, Kyle’s hands found their way to Cartman’s hair. Gripping at it like his life depended on it. It was Eric’s name in Kyle’s voice every time he pushed his hips against his. He couldn’t help crying his enemy’s name out. And that just made Eric more eager to hear it over and over again. 

He made some noises himself, but tried not to overcome his lover’s. Not that he could, even if he wanted too. He was really loud. 

Soon, they against the wall. 

While Cartman’s hands were on Kyle’s hips guiding his movements his mouth was attached to his collarbone. He wanted everyone to notice what he has done. 

They were both sweating messes. They wouldn’t last much longer. Kyle moved his hips  faster than before. His insides engulfed Eric’s length so perfectly that they just needed a couple more movements to reach their climax. 

They took a second to ride their climax out. Cartman wrapped his arms around Kyle. Their breathing still erratic but calming with each passing second of them holding each other close. Cartman kissed softly the bruises he made as Kyle played with Eric’s “post-sex” hair.

“That was…” Eric was looking for the correct word for this. Amazing? Intense? Out of this world? 

Kyle smiled. “Yeah. That was.” He kissed Cartman’s forehead. 

They looked right to each other’s eyes and happily sighed. 

Thank whoever got us stuck in here. Was Eric’s thought for the rest of their night. 

The next morning they woke up as quick as possible. They knew that someone was coming anytime soon and they didn’t want anyone to see them like that. 

They weren’t as presentable as yesterday but it would work.

They placed everything in order and cleaned whatever evidence of their nightly actions.  

And they were right. The first ones to arrive were Stan and Kenny, who, miraculously, found them in the storage room. 

“Were you two here the entire night?” Asked Stan with his best surprised expression. 

“And you didn’t kill each other?” Kenny continued. 

“Thank “someone” that you are here!” Said Cartman dramatically. “I couldn’t stand his annoying ass for another minute!” He got out of the room with Kyle right behind him. 

The redhead scoffed. “Fuck you, Cartman. If it weren’t for you we wouldn’t have been trapped in the first place!” 

Stan was about to interrupt them but when he realized they didn’t even stop to talk to them. 

“My fault?! How in hell was that on me?” Cartman sneered. 

They continued fighting until they were out of Kenny’s and Stan’s sight. 

Both of them looked at the other. 

“What just happened?” Asked Stan to Kenny. The blonde just shrugged and signal Stan to go into the storage room. 

They went in and stared at the now empty room. Kenny checked the top of the shelf and found an untouched bottle of wine and another of lube. He showed them to Stan. 

“Well… I guess our plan didn’t work.” Kenny sighed. “Maybe they really just hate each other?” They stayed quiet for a second.

“No.” They both said at unison. 

“There’s no way they spent the night together and didn’t even kissed each other.” Stan got out of the room. 

“Well… Only they know what went down last night.” Kenny followed him and closed the door. This time, with an empty room. 

They made their way to the office. 

Eric was talking to Butters. They didn’t know about what but the blonde seemed interested and  amazed with whatever Eric was telling him. 

Kyle on the other hand was looking quite uncomfortable while sitting at his desk. Kenny raised an eyebrow at this. But it was in a particular movement that he saw it. 

He elbowed Stan to look carefully at the redhead. Stan noticed it right away. 

“I guess it did work.” He said cooly. Kenny nodded and they fist bumped before going to their respective areas.  

What’s wrong with bettas?

Annnd as promised, here’s that write-up on betta genetics and what’s wrong with all those pretty genes. We’ve got pictures and everything. This is a full, comprehensive list of the various problems with domestic betta traits. If you’re in the market for a new angry pal, then there’s a list of “good” things to look for in a betta at the end.

Just a quick intro before we begin: I’ve been into fishkeeping for over a decade, I currently have 16 running tanks ranging from 5 to 440 gallons, I’ve got about 200 fish at the moment, and I’ve had a good 20 to 25 bettas of my own over the years. When I was younger, I even bred a pair of pet store veiltails together, and reared some of the fry into adulthood. So, this is information coming from someone has both seen these things firsthand and talked with many, many other betta keepers who have done the same.

This is my new betta, Embezzlement. He looks great, right? He really does! But he’s also quickly going blind as a result of his thickened scales growing over his eyes, his fins will end up dragging him down to the point of immobility as he ages, and he’s at high-risk for developing visible tumors all over his body. I’ll get into that under the cut!

(To learn more about why the heck I willingly bought Bezel, just click the link attached to his name up there.)

((I don’t own any of these photos, or bettas, unless noted))

The Dragonscale Gene

We’ve all seen these boys and admired them. Please refer to my totally pro image mashup above and look at the thickened, shiny scales. That’s dragonscaling. It comes in white, grey, blue, and teal; and it can cover any part of the body, including the fins. Some have masks of dragonscaling, some have full body coats, and some just have intermittent patches. Most dragonscale bettas start developing noticeable dragonscaling at 1-2 months, and it continues spreading from that point on. 

Now, if it was just a pretty shimmery gene, that would be great! But it isn’t. Dragonscales are abnormally thick scales that spread everywhere, even over their eyes. You can see the scales start to circle around the cornea on the left, and a progression on the three fish to the right. Once the scales reach the eyes, it’s only a matter of time before they go completely blind. (This is basically a guarantee for bettas with dragonscaling on their face.) If you don’t want a blind betta that can’t safely navigate its environment, stay away from those opaque, shiny, thick scales. 

The Marble Gene

If you’ve ever seen a pretty “koi” betta covered in colorful blotches? That’s a marble. A weird, flesh-toned betta with neat speckles? That’s a marble. If you’ve ever seen a betta that’s changed colors over the span of its life? That’s 100%, definitely, without a doubt, a marble. The prevalence of marbles in the market is for 3 reasons: 1) it’s considered a dominant gene, 2) marbles are pretty rainbow boys, and 3) it’s also really, really hard to breed back out of lines.

So, the thing about marbles is... their pigment cells are constantly mutating. They can completely change colors in a couple months. Your red and black and white koi that you paid $30 for might turn into a muddy maroon right before your eyes. And since their cells are constantly mutating, you guessed it—

They’re prone to developing tumors. Yeah. They go lumpy even faster than the average betta.

Blue Bettas and Graphite Disease

Nah, not even the comparatively boring bettas are safe. Bettas that are 90-100% blue with little other coloration on their bodies? They’re prone to graphite disease, which is a fast-acting killer with no known cure. 

Their fins and bodies start turning grey, like someone shaded them with a pencil, and then boom: they’re dead within a few days. This is likely due to their reduced ability to process carotenoids, which are the substances responsible for increased red pigment. They also play an important role in keeping the immune system functioning properly, so without those.... yeah. They get sick even more easily than your average betta, and they die even more easily than your average betta. Also. Graphite disease. Not a fun time.

Red Bettas and Tumors

Pure red bettas are some of my favorites. Red is a symbol of good luck in Southeast Asia, where bettas are primarily bred and shown, so they’re also an important part of the industry. However, to get that pure, solid red coloration in a fish that’s descended from these guys:

You’ve got a lot of inbreeding to do. Linebreeding, inbreeding, crossing back, whatever you want to call it. It can be beneficial to show lines if you’re doing it right, because breeding the offspring of an animal back to its parent intensifies all of the traits that were passed onto it. However, with fish that are and have always been treated as trinkets, no one bothers screening for the negative traits that are being compounded along with the coloring.

So, red bettas are a whole mess of health issues, but they’re very prone to developing tumors. This is, unfortunately, one of the ones I have plenty of experience with. When I was younger, I had a male veiltail with solid red coloring, and he turned into a mass of lumps before dying. The same thing happened with my most recent betta, Genie. She was in my care for all of 9 months before I had to put her down, as there were multiple little tumors developing all over her body, and a large one over her internal organs that was visible from the outside.

Here’s a side by side comparison. From the day I got her to the day I euthanized her so she wasn’t in pain. For those of you who don’t know about her, she was the pond betta who lived in a 440 gallon blackwater biotope and fed a live insect-based diet. The pH in there is 5.8, the temp is 78F, the water quality is always 0/0/0, and there weren’t any environmental stressors that contributed to her decline in health. She was kept in the best conditions I could possibly give her, and she still went that far downhill in 9 months. She wasn’t a full year old.

Unfortunately, it gets worse from here! Get a glass of water, grab some snacks, we still have fin types to cover.

Halfmoons and Rosetails

You see those two gorgeous guys above? Those are halfmoon bettas, one of the most popular and commonly available types of bettas! Note how dang big those fins are. They only have them fully extended like that when they’re flaring. Now, look at this picture of a halfmoon with his fins in the normal position:

See how they collapse into a long, ruffled shape? Two things here. 1) Those fins are literally useless and hinder them from swimming properly, so they have to exert way more effort than necessary to even move around. This is how we get that signature “betta wiggle” that people find endearing. To properly drag those massive fins around and keep them from dragging, they have to undulate their whole body in an exaggerated manner, which gets harder and harder as they age.

And 2) This leads to fin biting. Note how that poor guy’s tail is all tattered and shorter than his ventral and dorsal fins. When bettas are weighed down by their own fins? Their solution is, a lot of the time, to self-mutilate and nip them off. The jury is still out on whether or not they have feeling in their fins; but even if they don’t, they’re still opening themselves up to potential infections. Plus.... even the fish don’t want those draperies. C’mon. You know it’s not good if they’re literally tearing themselves to shreds just so they can swim again.

Can’t forget rosetails, either! That blind pal on the left and living tulle skirt on the right are bred for fins that go over the halfmoon point (they aren’t a semi-circle, they’re more like a pizza with a couple slices taken out)  and have enough bulk that they stay ruffled even when they’re flaring. For obvious reasons, these are even worse than halfmoons. Oh god those poor fish.

Crowntails

These spiky boys are crowntails, another common fin type seen in Petsmarts and Walmarts everywhere. Not much to say about them that wasn’t covered under the halfmoon section. They’re fin biters, because even though they don’t have as much fin mass, those tendrils still create large amounts of drag and hinder their movement.

Doubletails

We took a halfmoon and we made it worse. That.... that takes skill. These genetic abominations were specifically bred to have not one, but two tails! And I’m not sure how much truth there is behind this, but their spine is supposed to split into two portions to create that Y shaped tail. Obviously, that would strain their spine and create a whole handful of new problems, on top of that further decreased swimming ability.  (After Bezel passes, I’ll probably get a doubletail and see if that spine thing checks out.)

Congrats! You made it to the bottom!

Now, here’s what to look for, if you want to buy a healthy(er) betta.

If you’ve been in a pet store recently and looked at the shelf with all the bettas on it, you can probably recognize some of these traits in 9/10 fish. And if they’re not lying on their side on the edge of death, they’ll probably look good and healthy and tempting to take home.

Remember how screwed up those bettas are, though, and get one of the better options. Here’s a list of questions to ask yourself before taking a betta home.

Male or female? When it comes to fin types, females will almost always be better off than males. Thanks to sexual dimorphism, female bettas have shorter, less exaggerated fins. Therefore, a crowntail female can swim about as easily as a plakat (read: short-finned fighter type) or veiltail betta. If it’s a female, just make sure the fins aren’t bitten or weirdly long. If it’s a male, see below.

How drastic are the fins? The shorter, the better. Just make sure they aren’t short because they’ve bitten them off. Also, veiltails are one of the healthiest fin types currently available, because they’re an “undesired” trait, and have wider gene pools as a result of not being inbred to a severe degree. They're functional, too! These boys can swim.

How pretty is it? If the betta looks like a galaxy painting threw up on it, then chances are, it’s gonna have some issues later in life. You want a betta that’ll hopefully live for years? Get an ugly one. Orange, yellow, tan, peach, dirty white, whatever. Stay away from those solid reds/whites/blacks/blues. Those two boys above are great examples of “ugly” bettas. Even though the one on the left is marble, he still has a better chance of living a good life than an inbred solid black disaster.

If you want something a little fancier than a fish that looks like.... well, kind of like flesh, get a cambodian! Their coloration is a variation of piebald. They’re characterized by a light, peachy body and colorful fins. They’re pretty flesh fish. These were actually one of the earliest types of domestic bettas, fun fact.

How shiny is it? Shiny scales don’t automatically mean they betta is a dragonscale carrier. For example, compare these crowntail and plakat (that fighter-type mentioned above) males to the true dragonscales at the very top. Lightly shimmery scales that naturally fade into the body aren’t dragonscales. If they’re the same size and thickness as the rest of the scales, they probably aren’t dragonscales. You can get an eye for telling the two apart after awhile.

And that’s it, that’s the show. Thanks for reading!

This guide was written on 2/03/2019 and will be edited as necessary.

2/08/2019: edited to remove swearing

🔧Cyberpunk: Android Yukimura: Part 3

Part 3: Tis but a scratch.

Trigger warnings: mention of past torture, abuse, noncon body alteration, abuse...if someone thinks I missed something, lmk.

What are emotions again and why do we have a past if not to inform the present? Nothing can be quite so simple though, can it?

❤️Story beneath the cut:❤️

Shadows claimed corners, odd shapes taking on alarming qualities whereby the imagination is given permission to run rampant. There was a light directly overhead where he’d been seated, but his hand wouldn’t be shielding his eyes from its glare. He felt like he was back in an interrogation room, though oddly he couldn’t remember when or why he’d last been in one.

What was visible beside him couldn’t be described as anything except instruments of torture. For a droid, that is. Spanners, wrenches, screwdrivers, an electric looking multitool defying identification. Everything his new owner would need to take him apart piece by meticulous, excruciating piece.

Further along the table beyond the immediate reach of the light were bits and pieces of other cannibalized electronics. Their wires poked out every which way, a very few of them recognizable for what they originally were. This was giving him flashbacks of a particularly nightmarish owner. She had made it her goal to see how many ways one could make a stubborn android beg. Being resilient and difficult to permanently damage...with an abundance of pain receptors...had its downsides.

The new gal reappeared from whatever dark recess she’d been rummaging in. She muttered to herself, something he would learn to be a bit of a habit of hers. “Let’s see about getting your mouth working again, shall we?”

Oh great. Just wonderful. Why would she want do that? So she’d feel justified in taking him apart? Cause so far, 99% of his owners would’ve agreed his ability to speak was their least favorite attribute and most likely to make them want to shoot him. Expense was usually the reason why they didn’t, but he doubted she had to pay much for him. Was it too late to be melted down for metal or was she still hoping to find something useful in his Swiss cheesed chassis?

His head was turned to the side and all he could see was the freak show that was her wall; more scraps and parts hung on hooks that though they were barely visible were also definitely terrifying. Meanwhile she messed around in the removable panel on the side of his skull. There were a vanishingly small number of those accessible on his body: the rest of his wiring required almost something akin to surgery to get at. What the inventor was thinking when he designed this series was...more than anyone had managed to comprehend. Made modifications and repair unfortunately difficult.

“—couldn’t be too smart if she thinks there’s any point.”

He’d been trying to distract himself when he realized—belatedly—that his speech functions had begun working again. Though it wasn’t as if it would change what he said...much. His glare and her raised eyebrow met when she adjusted his head to face forward. She clicked her tongue at his expression, but looked all too pleased with herself for his preference.

“That’s one detail out of the way. I want you to answer a couple of questions for me before I have to worry about what you’d do with mobility.”

“You’re out of your mind if you think that’s a possibility. ...Mistress.”

“Name’s Azar. Not ‘mistress’, not owner or whatever else the flip you’ve called people before, Az—“

“I can’t call you that.” Yuki interrupted her, earning a frown.

“Explain.”

Not doing what she wanted was a tempting idea, but ticking her off didn’t have any upside. He sighed heavily, “One of my owners wasn’t too thrilled with the words I used to describe them. It was the truth! ...And I didn’t think it was as bad as they said. But they added programming. Tweaked with my software. I can only call my current owners by the title Master or Mistress. Lot less interesting,” he grumbled.

She looked like she was holding back laughter, while being horrified at the same time. Humans were too complicated, especially women. Did all of his alterations disgust her? He shouldn’t care. He didn’t want to care. There was nothing to be caring about! Yeah...sure. Sounds real convincing.

“Alright. We’ll get to that later. Stop or correct me if I get anything wrong.” She ticked off her fingers as she listed the things that had made his life a living hell. “In my research, it was mentioned you couldn’t lie to me.” Pointer finger. “Your main programming, the one part of you no one can alter, is your mandate to protect your owner. Which means you can’t hurt them unless allowed, you’re specifically asked to, or it’s done to save their life.” Middle finger. Which, for the record, he’d like to give to her. “However, you do have leeway in a number of directions based on your discretion and your owner’s orders.”

She waited a beat before continuing, the line of inquiry setting off an uncomfortable crawl along his skin. Her thumb became finger number three. “And finally, you aren’t required to do anything your owner asks, but you can’t stop them from doing whatever they want to you.”

If he could’ve swallowed, he would’ve. Unfortunately everything from the base of his skull down didn’t work. He was beginning to wish that still included his mouth that had gone dry. It wasn’t so much a question, but he still answered, “Yes.”

She brightened visibly, though he wasn’t going to take that as a good sign. The tool was put down, and he almost took a breath in relief. Belay that, what the hey was she doing?! The blood colored substitute rushed to his face, creating a crimson hue he’d forgotten he was capable of. Judging by her stare, she hadn’t known he could do that either. “Watch your hands, Mistress!” He shouted without thinking twice and she jumped back with that multitool snagged and pointed at him like a weapon.

“What the blaze did you just do with your face?! And what’s the yelling for?” She let out an annoyed huff, “I was just taking your shirt off. Chill, okay?” She went from freaked out to calm in the space of a second, though he could tell her hands were shaking. That information was filed in the back of his mind for later. Something more than his reaction had spooked her.

He bit his tongue, wishing he could disappear into the floorboards. Or anywhere, really. Could she not peer into his eyes so closely?? That grin was something else too. “Ohh, is someone shy? Don’t worry, Red. Nothing I haven’t seen before.”

Wh-what did she mean by that? But more importantly, “My name isn’t ‘Red’, it’s Yukimura. And tha-that isn’t—I’m not—“

She didn’t wait for him to finish. His shirt was in shreds already; the frag gun that had chewed him up had left the fabric’s integrity at nearly nil and she split it easily to reveal his chest. Again she stepped back, this time her face going blank. That was okay. Yuki didn’t need her expression to tell a story. Heart rate, respiration, sweaty palms, and a gesture, raking a pesky stray lock of ebony hair behind her ear, probably a tell. She was shocked.

A good few minutes passed, only her eyes moving, roving over his exposed torso. This was just the beginning, he wanted to joke. Should see his back. ‘Course, the gaping holes where he was missing synth skin was likely the main cause of the disturbing image. Normally when damage was done, either in the line of duty or...on purpose...one would just patch it up.

Droids didn’t heal per se. But they could be fixed, the circuitry hidden again behind something more palatable for the human eye to accept. Wasn’t so bad price-wise either if you didn’t care what color it was. Easiest stuff to purchase was an off-white that basically made it look like an old scar. And unless you really cared about your droid looking pristine or had a lot of money lying around, you were going for the cheap version. He was just counting his blessings none of them had wanted to spring for a color, maybe purple, and call it art.

“So, uhh, like...you gonna stare all night?”

She startled like she’d been shot, her eyes flying up to catch his and a flicker of something...was that pity? darting across them. Nah. No one felt sympathy for droids. Not that he’d seen. Her voice told a different story, its tone soft as she moved closer—her fingertips raising goosebumps on the skin not scarred. “Does it...hurt?”

All...all fifteen plus holes in his chest? The metal fragments wedged in vital components that have caused him to all but grind to a halt? Or the tenderness she used while he braced himself for the new agony she was surely going to cause? He wanted to lie. He wanted so badly not to be vulnerable in admitting what he had been trying unsuccessfully to ignore for a week. He was fine! Just fine. It didn’t hurt and she couldn’t hurt him. Then she wouldn’t get to know what advantage she held until he screamed. A brief reprieve until then, couldn’t he ask for that much? He’d see the truth of it in her eyes soon enough, just as he had all his other owners but one. The hubris it gave them. The thirst for power. Knowing his pain or relief was in their hands.

He wanted to, but he couldn’t. There was no escape granted for him. Clearly and with as much dignity as he could muster he answered, “Yeah...it-it’s still...” He stopped, but she seemed to understand.

Thing was, if he’d been a human...well, if he were a human he’d be dead. This many vital components hit would’ve been one thing. The loss of fluid would be the next. They’d self sealed after a time, but even had the fragments not gotten into his circuitry, he didn’t have enough fluid left to function with. Much like a human with severe anemia, he was too weak.

He had forgotten or filed away the memories of how it felt when he’d first been shot. The seal had dulled much of the pain. When she cut one of them back open however, he had to grit his teeth and even then couldn’t keep the whimper down. Truth was, it all hurt. Everything hurt. From the headache brought on by stress and prolonged anxiety, to the toes he couldn’t move but annoyingly, frustratingly, were connected in a way similar to a human’s body. When one aspect was affected the rest felt it.

Eyes closed, he tried to concentrate on just one sensation. Just the scratching and clicking noises of her tools working on his chest. The pain coming from the reopened wound. Just that, as if that weren’t enough. Invasive. Frightening. Gone. What? He could tell the moment she’d stopped, his eyes springing open. Wh-where’d she go?

A loud clattering could be heard just to his side, but he couldn’t see her in his periphery. The next thing he knew, she was laying him down on the table, an adjustable lamp hovering directly over his chest. This was definitely not helping his nerves. The woman, Azar, paused and he thought she smiled. There wasn’t much to see beyond the too bright light over him. It seemed like she was reaching towards his face, but he flinched and she pulled back, squeezing his shoulder lightly instead.

“I’ll be done soon.”

Done? Done with what? What was she doing to him? Was he going to be doomed to being a music player now? Nothing more than a repurposed boombox? His imagination was going a million miles a minute, but he didn’t ask. He knew his voice would crack.

A new component was added to his chest, wires the width of human hair connecting and causing an almost ticklish sensation despite it all. A substance applied to the hole finished the operation and...it was almost more than he could comprehend. It didn’t sting, didn’t burn either. He couldn’t help it, waiting for the sealant to seep into his bloodstream equivalent and spread fire. It never came. Rather, that particular wound which hadn’t ceased sending pain messages to his processor had...silenced. And he could twitch his fingers. What the frak had she done?

“Ngh...aahHHK! Please, please just stop...” His relief was short lived. A new wound was reopened and this one must have been connected to a nerve cluster. He couldn’t see her face past the bright lights hovering over him, but he knew her hands were still moving. Slowly, methodically, the tools scraped and removed and sent receptors screaming...or was that him? She said something; her voice too soft to hear over the alarm bells ringing in his head. All he knew was it wasn’t over yet and he was right. She wasn’t any different than the others.

By the fifth one, he was out of energy. There was nothing left, and nothing replenishing his stamina. Her muttering was washing over him without much comprehension. Unless she addressed him specifically, it wasn’t worth the expenditure of energy to translate her words into something recognizable.

“Didn’t want to add the synth-flow until I was done. Will make this more messy...hm. Can’t be helped. Looks like you won’t last without it.”

A needle was inserted in the crook of his elbow, not the first from the white points dotting the skin. None of those had been voluntary either. He couldn’t see her wincing, didn’t know what to make of her tracing the scars like a constellation. Too soon her instruments of torture were back to digging around his torso.

The...odd thing was...one by one the gaping injuries she’d meddled with were being closed, the pain declining. It had been impossible to notice for a time; his thought processes were overloaded with emotions, memories, and the searing, piercing agony inflicted in whichever wound she was invading. The combination had shut down logical reasoning, but clarity returned with the infusion of artificial blood...as well as movement? Fingers, wrists, feet, neck...slight adjustments sure, but after being frozen stiff for so long, it was nothing short of amazing.

“There. That oughta do the trick.” Her hand brushed back his hair, and though he shied away from the action, she didn’t seem to notice. “Got more of that stuff on order. Friend of a friend owes me a favor.”

She gestured flippantly at his abdomen, already turning to put her tools away. Something didn’t sound right about her voice, too high and breathy, but he was too busy sitting up and gawping at his chest. There was...nothing there. No holes, no new scars. “That stuff” she’s got on order must’ve been the synth skin. Why would she waste the precious resource on him? Unless...

A clattering noise wrenched his attention away from clashing probabilities to were she’d stumbled against the table.

“I’m fine,” was mumbled. She didn’t give much credence to her words when her eyes rolled into the back of her head and her knees buckled.

Lightening fast reflexes caught her before her head caromed off the metal bench. His joints protested and the needle was ripped out of his arm, but he did what he was designed for. It wasn’t even a thought.

Laying her in the sparse but comfortable cot at one side of the room, he checked her pulse and took her temperature. Another deep sigh, appreciating the ability to take a full breath without hitching. “Great. First day and you’re already so needy. Why’d you have to go and work yourself into a fever for?”

One thing’s for sure. She wasn’t what he’d been expecting. “Just don’t go dying on me, got it? Dumm—Mistress.”

Evil Overlords Have Feelings Too - Part 3

by Jenifer Irwin Part 3 "Hahaaa! I won again! Well, sort of," Robotnik said as he rode along in the pod on the Steel Snake's back. Arashi, sitting next to him, smirked slightly. "Well, he probably lost a lot more valuable equipment than you did, so I'd say you won."

"Plus, I've got the Chaos Emeralds... I really could have used these BEFORE I took over the world. Urh. Now, the only problem left is finding a suitable place to rebuild a base..." Arashi smiled slightly and turned to pet the chao that were sitting behind the seats. The little creatures were so cute, especially Devlin the Devil Chao. For all his diabolical appearance, he was still just an innocent little baby-like creature, toddling around looking for food. I'm really proud of him, Arashi thought as she glanced up at Robotnik briefly. And really glad that I met him. Life has never been so fun and adventurous. Plus, I never thought I would get to witness him personally ending Sonic's life. With me having betrayed Sonic! Hah! Ah, my hero... He had been concentrating on flying the Steel Snake, whose movement was controlled by his mind alone, when he glanced casually at Arashi. The look on her face, it was... AUGH. The ship lurched to the side, rocking violently, a manifestation of the doctor's inner reaction. Four chao were thrown into the wall and Arashi gasped as she was jerked sideways in her restraining harness. Robotnik quickly stared straight ahead again, bringing the ship under control. Great. Just great, Robotnik thought to himself. Somehow I knew this was going to happen. I think it was there from the start. But I definitely knew when she darn near kissed me back there at the ruins of the base... I'm too fat, too ugly to be attractive, right!? Well, like I told Takar... just being diabolical has a certain charm to it... but I can't let feelings get in the way of my work. He glanced carefully over at her so she didn't notice. She was too busy calming the chao down. ...can I? He shook his head suddenly at his own thought, then masked the apparently reasonless motion by sneezing violently. Arashi looked up, blinking. "Getting a cold?" she asked, snickering slightly. "Nah," Robotnik replied. "Dust in my nose." He sniffed slightly. No way. I can't let people know I have too many feelings. Just isn't me. I have to keep that nasty, heartless image that Sega gave me. Right? He was approaching a city. Glad of this, he growled to himself as he struggled with his thoughts, and blew up the nearest building. Arashi glanced at the cloud of dust that resulted, metal flying everywhere, and wondered what he was doing. "Yes! Boom! Explosions! Scrap metal! I am evil! Verrrry evil!" Robotnik seemed almost in his own little world as he continued to shoot rockets into buildings, watching with a strange glee as they exploded all over the place. "I'm hungry," he said suddenly after about 6 places exploded, and descended towards the streets. The Steel Snake weaved its way through the city, frightening people in their cars and causing sirens to blare. The police didn't dare touch him, though--after all, he was Emperor Ivo Robotnik. Hearing the sirens, a McDonald's employee glanced out a window, just as the wall opposite of that window burst in, bricks collapsing to the ground and dust flying up as a giant, silvery, robotic snake slithered in through the huge hole. Workers and customers alike screamed and trembled, some frozen, some running out of the restaurant and away. The pod flipped open and Ivo Robotnik vaulted out, dropping to the ground, Arashi Codiv jumping out with four chao in her arms. "Aherm, twenty Big Macs, twenty super-size fries, a large Dr Pepper, a large Mountain Dew, and four happy meals with small Dr Peppers, for here. And, of course, free," Robotnik said. He casually drew his laser gun, holding it down at his side as he shifted his weight to one leg, fist on hip. "U-uhh... s-sir, w-we don't s-serve those d-drinks..." Robotnik pondered. "Now let's see, I forgot how to work the safety on this..." He fiddled with the laser gun, one finger precariously gripping the trigger. The cashier gulped loudly and said, "Uh, I'll... be right back, I'm going to go rob another restaurant and bring you your drinks! Very quickly!" He ran away with speed that could impress even Sonic. Adrenaline can do funny things to people. The fear-inspiring customers took a seat at a large booth, waiting for their food. It was delivered to them quickly. The chao were given their happy meals, and the 20 pairs of big macs and fries sat on the table before Arashi and Robotnik. He gestured to them, saying, "Take what you can eat." She moved just one big mac and fries over. Gladly, Robotnik took the rest, scarfing it all down with disturbing ferocity. By the time Arashi was finished with her food, Robotnik was too. Which was frightening, considering he was eating 19 times more than she was. Customers and employees stared, jaws dropping. Robotnik looked up, acting quite annoyed, though he loved the attention. "What? I'm having LUNCH, for crying out loud." He brandished the laser gun, practically giggling inwardly as he watched them all force themselves to pretend to be overly interested in something else. Even after they all looked away, the tension in the air was so thick you could cut it with a knife. The chao were playing happily with the toys they got from their happy meals when one of them broke. Balor, the one who had the broken toy, started to cry. Robotnik grinned across the table at Arashi and got up, approaching the cashiers, who went pale and started trembling in fear. Oh, how he loved having that effect on people. It gave him chills. He leaned casually on one of the registers and said, "You know what to do, right?" With quick, frantic movements, the cashier produced every toy they had in the restaurant, shoving them all across the counter. Robotnik gestured to the four chao to come over, and they skipped over gleefully, picking out the toys they wanted. He snickered to himself and grinned over at Arashi. Arashi had to do a double-take. The grin was almost... goofy. Like a teenager who just thoroughly impressed his girlfriend and is practically intoxicated from the victory. She gave him a slightly bizarre look, and he realized... Gaahhhh! What am I doing!? Coughing suddenly, Robotnik resumed his gruff, nasty demeanor and gestured with the laser gun at the toys. "Yeah, that's it, take lots of'em," he said to the chao. Getting a power high, Robotnik decided to terrorize more people as he ambled from table to table, looking down at the trembling customers who sat in booths or chairs. He snarled unexpectedly at a little boy, sending him running away crying in fear. Another person had to give up all of his money or be shot. Arashi noticed there were police cars sitting outside, but the policemen stood next to their cars, looking just as scared as everyone else. Everybody knew. Everybody knew that this was Emperor Robotnik. Everybody knew that you do not mess with Emperor Robotnik. Dozens of people trembled in his presence as he demanded money from random people. Nobody was hurt, but lots of people went broke that day. Robotnik smiled pleasantly and approached the Steel Snake as Arashi gathered up the four chao and hopped in. Turning back to the crowd, Robotnik silently slid a plate back on the laser gun, exposing the battery chamber. Nothing was in it. He had held them all at gunpoint, threatening and robbing them, with an unloaded gun. When they all realized this, he could see the disbelief and despair on their faces, and he laughed maniacally before hopping into the Steel Snake and heading out. Arashi grinned as they flew above the city and eventually away from it, just cruising along. There was no real direction to their travel, because Robotnik couldn't stop laughing. His laugh wasn't the severely masculine, deep, diabolical one that he usually used, it was an almost drunk half-giggle. He was completely high to the point of insanity on ego and power, and loving every second of it. It was infectious; soon, Arashi joined in the laughter. Ah, yes, nothing like a couple of mad scientists laughing crazily as they soar over the plains on a beautiful Saturday afternoon. Very suddenly, Robotnik stopped laughing, his jaw dropping as he stared straight ahead at something in the distance. Arashi looked at him in alarm, following his gaze. What was... oh, no... something racing through the high grasses with such speeds as to set them on fire... something spiky... something blue... ** (30 minutes ago, in Takar's secret Earth-based lab) "Yes... yes, that's it... Right... go on, computer, you can figure this out, I know you can..." Takar urged the supercomputer on as it crunched numbers, furiously scanning the ash samples for data. He watched the screen hopefully, desperately. "YES! YES! I LOVE you, computer! I love you, Windows XP! You're so good to me! Well, usually!" The DNA data for both Sonic and Tails was coming up, clear as day, no pieces missing. Takar grinned evilly. "Time to give you two a bit of a boost." The alien walked up to the strange device that he had created, which had a large door on one side and a funnel on the other. He cut his finger slightly, squeezing a few drops of purple blood into the funnel, and sealed the wound with his regenerative powers. Sitting back down at the computer, he typed a few things in at a furious pace, watching as some diagrams and 3-D renditions of Sonic and Tails changed and shifted. Tails became a bit leaner, Sonic a bit taller. Sonic's eyes glowed an even more vibrant green than they did before, almost a glow-in-the-dark quality coming to them, and Tails' blue eyes started glowing oddly too. A few checks over the data, and Takar saved his file. He clicked the 'compile and run' button, then sat back and waited. The big device with the door churned and shuddered, and after about 5 minutes, Sonic spilled out of the door, looking quite surprised. Tails soon followed while the hedgehog was still trying to accustom himself to being alive again. "What the heck!?" were Sonic's first words. He glanced up to see Takar and the lab, becoming alarmed for a moment. Then he realized that this was probably someone from the same band of aliens that brought him back to life from a corpse with a resurrection beam before. "Welcome back to life," Takar said, grinning. "I'm Takar, Ykrian Leader. Would you like to get back at Robotnik? I've... enhanced you two a bit. I'm sure once you go out and start doing things, you'll find out what I mean." He leaned back in his chair, smiling smugly and quite willing to allow Sonic and Tails do all the dirty work for him. Sonic stood up, panting slightly, and glanced at Tails. "Hey, you shrunk. And you lost weight." "I think you grew, Sonic..." The two glanced at each other uncertainly, noting the odd quality of their eyes and the slight change in physical appearance. Suddenly, Sonic remembered his main goal and said, "Time to go kick some butt! Thanks, green dude!" With that, he raced towards the door, Tails on his heels. "Wait!" Takar yelled. Sonic stopped and turned towards him, raising an eyebrow. "Dr. Robotnik has all seven chaos emeralds... so watch out." "Okay, Tails," Sonic said, turning to the fox. "You find a way to build another Tornado, and wait here. I'll get the chaos emeralds away from Eggman, and then I'll come back so we can power the new ship. You don't mind if Tails uses some spare parts of yours for it, do you, Takar?" "Anything... and I mean anything, to rid the world of Ivo Robotnik." Tails nodded, then happily ran over to a pile of stuff to start his building. Feeling a little different, thus slightly unsure of himself, Sonic emerged from the underground lab and jogged in place for a moment. He started to run at about 20 miles an hour. He gradually picked up speed, arms and legs moving quickly as he became more accustomed to his form. Within moments he was moving faster than the speed of sound. It didn't seem like it, though. He wasn't having to strain like he used to to do this. Quirking his mouth slightly in thought, he decided to really open up and give it everything he had. With reflexes even faster before and a strange hyper-awareness to any obstacles that he had to clear, Sonic blazed through a forest, literally running across the surface of a large lake, sending a huge column of water rising up behind him. He began to feel out of control as no matter hard he tried to exhaust himself, he just kept accelerating. The skin on his face was pulled on by the air that rushed past him, pulling the corners of his mouth back. His legs were moving so fast that their entire range of motion was like a solid entity. Instead of jumping that next log, he ran right into it, his legs sawing it in half like a knife through warm butter. Forgetting the fact that he might be out of control, Sonic just watched the scenery blur past him, exhilarated. He had never experienced speed like this before, even in his super and hyper forms. And he wasn't even breathing hard. Occasionally, he squinted at something in the distance, and found that his vision 'zoomed in' on it, but his hearing and sense of touch slightly diminished when that occurred. When he stopped squinting, everything went back to normal. Listening closely to the wind, the sound was amplified as his sight dimmed slightly... odd... Sawing through a boulder and a few more logs, Sonic suddenly blazed out onto a plain, setting the grasses on fire as he moved over them like a bolt of lightning. Accelerating with every step, he continued on. When he saw the Steel Snake, he gasped, and jerked his feet out in front of him to bring himself to a stop, creating some long ruts in the ground, but he managed. He looked up to see Robotnik lean out of the side of the pod, aiming a laser gun at his head. I am NOT going to die a THIRD time like this! It is just getting old for both me AND the readers! Sonic screamed to himself. He tried to dodge, but the laser caught him in the head anyway, searing through it. Oddly enough, he felt the pain. He was still alive. How!? However, he tried to make it look like it did work, and slumped to the ground, limp. Oh, it hurt. It hurt bad. But he had to stay still and expressionless. Robotnik stopped the Snake nearby and jumped out, carefully approaching the hedgehog with laser gun drawn. He noticed Sonic was, at the least, unconscious, and watched him carefully for a moment. He wasn't breathing, either. Lifting one of Sonic's wrists, Robotnik felt carefully for a pulse. There was none. Laughing, Robotnik yelled to Arashi, "Again, the hedgehog falls to my laser!" He pulled Sonic out of the ground and threw him in the cargo bay of the Steel Snake, then hopped into the pod and flew off. Inside the cargo bay, Sonic lay wondering. He really could play dead. His heart and breathing stopped just as he thought it would be nice for them to do so, when Robotnik approached him. Takar really did infuse him with some interesting new abilities, including the night vision that he was experiencing right now. He glanced around inside the dark compartment, jaw dropping when his eyes landed on the seven chaos emeralds, all in a plastic grocery bag, along with a supply of rings. Robotnik snickered to himself as he drove along, giving Arashi a smug glance now and then. This continued for a few minutes until he seemed to feel something... a large amount of energy... and the cargo door burst open as Super Sonic flew out of it, cackling. "What the!? You're DEAD, Sonic! This is impossible!" Robotnik yelled in surprise, watching as the golden hedgehog soared through the air briefly, then started trying to smash the Snake's jets off. Quickly, the jets retracted into the snake's body, as did the pod, and it just coiled up tightly like an armadillo and hovered there in the air with gravity reversal energy, all the attacks bouncing off the high-quality rubber-steel. This continued for quite a while as Sonic's urge to break something stayed with him, but eventually he came to his senses and realized it wasn't going to work. Dropping to the ground, he sped off back towards where Takar's lab was. Robotnik and Arashi remained concealed in the snake's back, with the evil genius using the senses of the snake to realize that Sonic had run away. As the jets and the pod re-emerged from the giant serpentine robot, the occupants were startled to see and hear the entire world shake violently for a moment, and a brilliant blast of multicolored energy emitted from somewhere in the distance. Looking up, the Steel Snake trained its advanced sensors in on a small object that was flying through the air. It was the blue chaos emerald! The pod lid flipped open and Robotnik quickly pulled off his racing harness, standing up and watching the emerald intently. As it neared, he maneuvered the Snake into position, then raised a hand slowly--catching the emerald expertly in a baseball glove. Sitting down, he wondered how this could have happened. Arashi asked, "Where did you get the glove?" "Oh, don't worry about the technicalities, this is a cartoon, after all," Robotnik said, then flipped down the pod lid, put his harness back on and headed in the direction that Sonic ran. Finding Sonic was easy--his speed had burned a path of charred grass through the plain, and eventually into a deep forest, out onto another plain where trees dotted the landscape. At a certain point, near an oddly-placed arrangement of boulders, giant ruts had been carved into the earth by two high-speed feet, then the grass was pressed flat by what had to have been high-speed winds from something. About 2 miles away from the ruts in the same direction that they were traveling, there was Sonic... wrapped around a tree and quite dead. Robotnik laughed so hard that he had to land the Snake to keep from crashing it. ** It took all of Robotnik and Arashi's strength to pull Sonic off of the tree. Robotnik eventually deduced, from the length of the ruts and the fact that a trapdoor was smack dab in the middle of the boulder arrangement, that Sonic had tried to stop near the boulders but couldn't. He must have run out of rings by that point, and reverted to his true form, with his enhanced speed, plus the augmentation to it from his hyper form, not allowing him to stop quite like he predicted. When he tried to stop, he must have caused the ruts, then knowing that wasn't going to do it, he accidentally flailed in such a way as to catch air, then have a fatal meeting with the kindly tree that managed to help him stop. The impact sent the emeralds flying, and judging from the speed of the blue one, they flew pretty far. How can you get that much information out of some burnt grass, ruts, flat grass, and a dead hedgehog stuck to a tree? Well, give me a break, Robotnik's IQ is 600 for crying out loud, he must know SOMETHING about forensic science. ** In Takar's secret lab, Tails and the Ykrian leader wondered what the heck had caused the earth to shake like it did. Tails decided to investigate, and made his way to the surface, immediately noticing the ruts in the ground. As he was looking around, something slammed into his head. Hard. Everything went black. A few minutes later, noticing that Tails was gone longer than he said he would be, Takar went to the surface as well, finding the two-tailed fox collapsed on the ground next to a red chaos emerald. Judging from where the wound was and where the emerald was, it must have fallen from the sky and struck him. The alien leader dragged Tails into the lab, taking the chaos emerald with them, and put it in the Tornado II, which was the original purpose of collecting at least one of the emeralds. He tested out the vehicle briefly, making sure it worked, and then set to reviving Tails. ** Robotnik pondered. I wonder where would be a place that's nice and secure, but looks good too... and is quiet, and where nobody would think to go... He pulled something resembling a permanently fixed laptop out of a panel in front of him, tapping a few things on the keys and searching for something. "Let's see, now, I could program it to use its sensors to..." Typing furiously as his idea formulated, he finished the code in just a few minutes as the Steel Snake hovered in the air. Arashi watched, knowing exactly what he was doing as she saw the code fly across the screen, and soon the Snake was moving again, probing with its senses as it searched. The pod on the Snake's back sank down into its body and steel plates moved to cover it up, concealing the pod entirely. Robotnik flicked on a light, and inside of the Snake, the environment was almost surreal. A constant, vibrating hum permeated the air, but it was otherwise silent. "Don't want the force of dirt pressing against this thing to snap it off or pop it open," he explained, concentrating. Pulling a small container of something out of a glove compartment, he handed it to Arashi. "Drink that. It'll help you keep from throwing up." He handed four smaller containers to the chao as well, then drank one of his own. Arashi looked at him dubiously. "You're not going to do what you did when we were fighting the UFOs, are you?" "Gonna do worse," he said matter-of-factly, waiting a few moments for whatever the liquid was to kick in. Everybody got an odd tingling in their stomach, and Robotnik pulled several straps out of the seats and walls. He strapped the chao firmly to the back wall, telling them not to worry as he looked at the wide-eyed, confused expressions, then secured Arashi's head to the back of her seat with a strap around her forehead. Pulling a last strap around his own head, he took a deep breath and started concentrating again. A rabbit screeched and leaped away as a giant metal thing slammed into the ground nearby. The Steel Snake's nose penetrated several feet into the earth, and it pushed downward as its entire body started to spin madly, drilling through the ground. It disappeared within seconds, leaving the rabbit dashing frantically over rumbling grasses. Inside the pod, it was utter chaos. All six occupants were screaming, perhaps in fear, perhaps in confusion, perhaps just for the heck of it, as the Snake spun on its axis at blurring speeds, the centrifugal force seeming to try to pull everyone in all directions at once. "AAAaaAAAaaaaAAAAaaaaAAAAAAAGHHHHH!" Robotnik had rather underestimated the power of the Steel Snake, and he was screaming the loudest, being the only one that finally, truly understood just how powerful it could be. Down, down the Snake went, drilling over 1000 feet into the ground, before it finally exited in a giant underground cavern, above a huge lake. Another 3000 or so feet it fell, until it splashed into the water, sinking to the bottom. It took several moments for the two to come to their senses as they sat there blinking, and finally, Robotnik looked over at Arashi. "That was COOL," was all he could say. The Steel Snake slithered out of the water and came to rest coiled up nearby. The pod rose out of its back and Robotnik grinned slightly as he and Arashi got out. Looking over at her, he knew he'd picked the right place. She stared around in awe, practically staggering, as she looked at the interior of the cavern. Thousands upon thousands, even millions, of tiny gems were encrusted on the walls, covering them, sparkling brilliantly. Every turn of the head produced a new look to them as some light that shined down through the hole in the ceiling reflected off the lake, bouncing dim light onto the crystals and giving it a surreal atmosphere. "Wow... wow," Arashi said, blinking. While he couldn't reciprocate on the occasions that she hugged him, Robotnik could at least build his next base in the most beautiful cavern in the world to make her happy. He glanced around, quite impressed with it himself, and thought about how exactly he was going to design the new base. Airborne, underwater, affixed to the walls or ceiling? Maybe even the floor? Perhaps a base that ran a ring around the lake on the floor? There were so many possibilities. But it had to be secure, not easy to access the inside, and big. Though, why keep everything in one building and risk it all being destroyed at once again in the event that someone started blowing up his stuff? He decided on a central control point--built in the center of the lake with bridges on all four sides to lead to its shores--and various bunkers in the water and around the lake. There would be underwater tunnels to lead from one building to the other. Now, where to get the materials. "Arashi, can I have your backpack?" ** Using the materials that he could find within the unknown recesses of Arashi's backpack (women can put lots of stuff in their chosen containers), Robotnik began to build. Arashi sat on a boulder near the edge of the lake, watching in blatant admiration along with the four chao as Ivo walked across and climbed on beams, every movement easy, flawless and familiar to him as he worked on the huge central building. It took shape into a giant fortress of steel, running underwater where the doctor used an oxygen tank to sustain himself while he built down there. The bridges were placed, and more bunkers scattered about, and finally, after 12 straight hours of work, it was all finished. A giant, transparent, protective dome was placed around the entire area, and the hole that had been created by the Steel Snake was turned into a metal shaft with dozens of doors so that getting through it would be difficult for any outsider. Lights were installed in a ring at the edges of the cavern to make seeing easier, and the place was, all in all, awesome. Total, the base had 250 rooms, with reinforced steel walls 10 feet thick. Most of the rooms would never be seen again, but it's pretty cool to be able to say you've got them. Probably only the kitchen, living room, lab, bedrooms, bathrooms and bunkers would ever really be used. Walking up to Arashi and flipping a wrench in one hand, backpack in the other, Robotnik gestured grandly. "Behold, the new Robotnik Fortress! Muahahaha!" He grinned, handing the backpack to her, and she jumped up from the rock. "Let's go in!" The Steel Snake followed the humans and chao into the base, settling down in its new lab. Robotnik showed Arashi around to all the new and improved stuff... more candy dispensers on the walls, an endless supply of Mountain Dew for her and Dr Pepper for him, a bigger refrigerator, automatically flushing toilets, beds with ALL of the neat features you see on commercials for really good ones, the works. When the tour was done, the two went into the lab. Robotnik opened the cargo hold on the Steel Snake and pulled out a very dead Sonic. "There's only one way I'm going to be able to keep you from coming back to life, or being brought back to life by aliens, or whatnot, Sonic..." Arashi watched in disbelief as Robotnik carried Sonic out of the lab and headed to the kitchen. She followed along, confused, wondering what crazy thing he was going to do next. Once in the kitchen, Robotnik stuffed Sonic into the funnel of the new microwave-pill-maker thing he made. Turning it on, he watched the machine groan and shake, churning as it processed the hedgehog into a small blue pill that clattered into the change-slot-like compartment. Robotnik picked up the pill, grinning evilly. "You're not gonna," Arashi said, disbelievingly, as the doctor picked up a glass of water. "And why not?" he asked, popping the pill in his mouth and washing it down in a single gulp of water. Arashi couldn't help but start laughing hysterically. "Hahahaha! Haha! I never thought I'd see you EAT Sonic!" She fell against a wall, laughing. "Mmh. Tastes like chicken," Robotnik joked, staring at the ceiling in a moment of thought. He set the glass of water down, knowing that there was no way Sonic could be brought back to life unless he himself were captured or killed before his body absorbed the pill's contents. He decided to stay in the base for a while so it could do just that. After a few hours, they would go out to find the other chaos emeralds. ** Robotnik was performing some upgrades on the Steel Snake, making it faster and with bigger rockets. Arashi sat nearby, petting the chao that sat in her lap as she watched the mad scientist work. "The energy that these chaos emeralds give off can help me locate the other ones as long as I have this one," Robotnik explained. He held up the brilliant gem, which sparkled blue in the light of the room. Even though it was blue--and most blue things reminded him of his adversary--it was a thing of wonder and beauty. Becoming distracted, the doctor stared into its depths for quite some time, mesmerized. I never noticed how beautiful these were, he thought to himself. In fact, I never really did notice any beauty in life until... Snapping back to reality, he glanced over at Arashi for a split second, then turned back to his work. Noticing the glance, Arashi grinned slightly, then set the chao aside and stood up, wandering over to Robotnik and watching what he was doing for several minutes. The jets were getting an upgrade, and he worked on each of them in turn. He was quite aware of her watching him the entire time, but didn't really make moves to acknowledge it. Deciding to take a small break, Robotnik wandered over to one of the many wall-refrigerators in the base, pulling out two cans--one of Dr Pepper and one of Mountain Dew--handing the second to Arashi. Snapping the Dr Pepper open, he started to take a drink. This was the second she'd been waiting for. "So, when should we get married?" Arashi asked abruptly. Though all she was doing was trying to get a funny reaction from him in the first place, Arashi realized she shouldn't have stood in front of him. He twitched suddenly, making a shocked *snrk* sound, then choked violently on his Dr Pepper and ended up spitting it all over her, dropping the can too. As he leaned against the wall coughing and gasping for breath, Arashi practically fell down laughing. "That... wasn't funny," Robotnik said as he pointed at her, trying to catch his breath, but he couldn't help but grin in amusement. "Not funny at all..." He started laughing. I've really got to find a way to get back at her with some pranks of my own, Robotnik thought to himself as he passed by her, giving her a slightly mischievous grin. As he went back to work on the Steel Snake, a cleaning robot automatically came out and mopped the Dr Pepper off the floor, disposing of the can as well, and Arashi headed for the shower room. As he worked, Robotnik started humming his theme song. A few bolts here, a plate there... "I love playin' this game by my rules... I will con-quer the world with mah tools..." By now, he'd left humming for singing the song. A few new circuit boards placed in the pod for homing missiles... "I am the en-em-y! I will succeed! My missions, yeah, I muu-ust complete! My name is Eggman, don't forget mah name--if ya ask me again, I'll show you the same!" It was pretty funny for him use a socket wrench as a microphone. Especially to Arashi, who started applauding, grinning in amusement. Startled, Robotnik whirled around. "Wha!?" Then he turned a deep shade of red. She'd seen the whole thing, hadn't she? "Uh... hrph... you shower fast," he muttered, coughing, and went soberly back to work. One thing was for sure, there was rarely a dull moment since she showed up in his base for the first time. He thought back to when she wasn't there, when he was awfully lonely... Even raising chao just didn't do enough for him, and before he'd started doing that, he was incredibly lonely. It would have been bad form to go out searching for someone, though. Evil Overlords just don't do that, unless they do it in such a way as to strike terror into their target, but he did that to everyone else already, so what would be the point? The point is... I have too many feelings! "Argh!" Robotnik pounded on the side of the Steel Snake with his the heels of his hands suddenly, looking frustrated, as if trying to compose himself. Arashi glanced over, taking a sip of Mountain Dew. "Something wrong?" "Nothing. My Carpal Tunnel Syndrome is acting up again," he lied, then walked away from the Snake and sat down at a lab control panel several feet away, sighing. Poor guy, Arashi thought as she looked at him. He's got real problems dealing with his emotions. She sighed and walked over to Robotnik. "Ivo, this is the price you pay for wanting more publicity," she said as she walked up behind him, putting her hands on his shoulders. "You wanted them to see the real Ivo Robotnik, right? Well, you're not letting them the way you're going!" Robotnik sighed in resignation. "Could you bring me a Dr Pepper, please?" "Sure thing," Arashi said, smiling slightly, and went over to the soda machine in the wall. ** "Alright," Robotnik said, flipping a wrench in his hand triumphantly, "It's finished! And now we can track down the rest of the chaos emeralds!" He jumped into the seat, followed by Arashi, and they took off out of the underground cavern at a blistering speed. When the resulting g-forces crushed the two to the point that Arashi appeared to lose all physical hints of being female and Robotnik became thin, he realized that was a little too much speed at once, and slowed the craft down. All went back to normal, but both riders' ribcages felt awful sore. Surprisingly, the nearest source of chaos energy didn't seem to be very far away. The Steel Snake soared through the air easily, towards Takar's secret lab. Robotnik hadn't investigated it when he first saw it because he wanted to get rid of Sonic completely first. As the two world leaders headed over the forest, they saw something in the distance as they heard propellers spinning... ** Tails was still a little dizzy, but he'd be alright in an hour or two. Takar seemed to dote over him like a loving parent would a child, getting him food and water immediately as he woke up, and making him as comfortable as possible. Obviously, the alien wanted to keep his anti-Robotnik weapons in as good of shape as he could. As soon as Tails was feeling his best, he hopped in his new ship and headed out, thanking Takar for his help. He started getting readings from another emerald as soon as he scanned for them... and it was quite nearby. "Tornado transformation!" the fox yelled in such a corny manner as his vehicle went from ground to air, turning into a biplane, and he headed off in the direction of where the readings were coming from. Almost as soon as he got out over the forest, he saw the glint of sunlight off of something shiny... ** "TAILS!" Robotnik yelled, cackling briefly. "How nice of you to come right to me!" The Steel Snake sped up, heading towards the biplane at incredible speed. As Tails realized what it was that was coming into view, his ears pressed flat against his head in fear, remembering what that thing did to him... He decided he was going to need Takar's help, and turned around to get out of there, but the plane wasn't fast enough. The Steel Snake quickly came up beside the biplane, grabbing it with a strong robotic arm that extended out from behind a scale-plate. The pod lid flipped open, and Robotnik leaned out, grinning. "So nice of you to deliver the chaos emerald to me, Tails," he said, brandishing his laser gun. Tails had to get out of there. In a desperate attempt to make it away from the mad scientist, he quickly turned the biplane, sending it slamming into the side of the Snake as he snatched the chaos emerald out of the Tornado and jumped out, sending his two tails into motion as they started to carry him away. An idea flashed into Robotnik's head as he trained the laser sights on Tails. No, this is getting old. I think I'll try something a little different... Arashi blinked as Robotnik tore the racing harness off, leaping out of the ship and using the biplane (which hadn't hurt the Snake at all) as a stepping stone, sailing through the air for a moment before he grabbed onto Tails' arms and kept a tight grip, hanging on. The fox screamed in fear, trying to shake Robotnik off of him, but he couldn't. The weight dragged him out of the sky, quite fast, and no matter how fast his tails went, he couldn't keep himself aloft. Robotnik wasn't doing anything but hanging there laughing cruelly. Tails became so tired in his desperation that Robotnik could literally steer him, like a parachute, as they headed toward the ground quickly. The Steel Snake stayed hovering in the air, just as it was programmed to do if he leapt out, and Arashi watched, laughing, as he steered Tails towards a large tree. Tails thought Sonic was heavy, but he didn't know heavy until he was forced to try to lug Robotnik through the sky. Nearly losing consciousness from the effort, the fox was helpless as his passenger pulled him down, slamming him into a tree headfirst at about 30 miles an hour. *THUNK!* Then they both smashed through several branches and fell into a bush, obliterating it. The force of the fall knocked Robotnik out cold, but Tails wasn't as fortunate--the mad scientist had fallen right on top of him, killing him instantly. Though it was a bad fall for Robotnik too, he came to a couple of minutes later with no serious injuries and a great amount of amusement. It was worth it. Taking the chaos emerald off Tails' corpse, the mad scientist summoned the Steel Snake and rode off into the distance towards his base, he and Arashi laughing maniacally the entire time. ** "CRAP!" Takar had seen the whole thing. He watched as the ships collided, as the Tornado eventually dove into the trees in a blazing spiral, as Robotnik had dragged Tails into the forest. He had seen the Steel Snake dive, then appear again, a fox tail stuck in the door of the cargo hold as the giant flexible ship flew away. "Arrrghhh! I HATE you, Ivo Robotnik!" Takar snarled and stomped down into his lab. "I'm supposed to be superior to these humans! Yet they seem to thwart me at every turn! Why?! Whyyyyyy!??" The alien leader sat down in his chair and started to cry. See, Robotnik isn't the only Evil Overlord with feelings. He started to plot, trying to figure out how to handle this situation. Pulling up the file for Sonic's DNA, he used a super-advanced satellite-like device to pinpoint the location of that DNA structure. When a 3-D model of Robotnik flashed up on the screen, Takar promptly fainted. ** "I wonder what fox seasoning tastes like on pizza," Robotnik said, crushing the orange pill up and tossing it over a slice. "On a side note, I think that Pill-Maker 3000 is the best thing I ever made." He gulped down the slice of pizza, grinning as he savored his victory, and stopped to take a drink of Dr Pepper after finishing. Arashi could just see it. Ivo had consumed Sonic and Tails by turning them into pills--was he going to eat every enemy he ever made from this point on? Certainly a sure-fire way of getting rid of someone, though. She took a drink herself and reached for the last piece of pizza, just as Robotnik did, his gloved hand landing on hers. Oh, god, one of these corny scenes again? Make it stop! The two looked across the table at each other, eyes locking. A hint of nervousness immediately hung in the air as both lost words, even breath... Two hearts skipped a beat as they realized... "Crap, we're out of pizza!" they both exclaimed in unison, and started hunting through Arashi's backpack for more. ** "Alright, fat guy, I've got a little something up my sleeve that I've been waiting to use until just this sort of situation," Takar said, pulling out a device with a fake chaos emerald in it. He tapped a few things on the buttons, then grinned as he found the locations of all the other chaos emeralds using the fake one like a radar. With a super-fast pod similar to Robotnik's infamous escape pod, the Ykrian leader zoomed out into the sky, towards a plains area in the northwest, where the cyan emerald was. He had to face many dangers to get all the emeralds. By the time he had them all, he had gotten half-mauled by a lion, fell off a bridge and slammed over some sharp rocks in rapids, was nearly crushed by a giant towering plateau that fell down when he extracted the purple emerald from a crack in it, and had to evade fire from military jets after stealing the grey one from the Pentagon. He'd dealt with all of that, there was no way the yellow emerald was going to pose a more dangerous situation than what he already faced... And it didn't. It was lying out in the middle of a field, harmlessly, and he walked right up and plucked it from the ground with an insane grin. He had the five remaining chaos emeralds... now he could-- A passenger airliner that was flying overhead malfunctioned, and a giant block of frozen sewage waste fell out, slamming directly into Takar and knocking him out. ** A few hours later, Robotnik was walking about the base collecting rings that seemed to pop up from time to time. Why were rings just lying about everywhere in the universe? Good question. No matter where you went--be it through the city, through a forest, underwater, even out in space--there were usually rings close at hand. It was strange. A loud rumbling was heard as the entire base shook for a moment, and an earsplitting explosion blew the central building apart, sending twisted metal flying outwards at blistering speeds. Some pieces embedded themselves in the gem-encrusted walls, things even exploding as they impacted. Robotnik felt a searing heat blow him out of the base, sending him into the water since he was in the part of the base that was submerged. He thrashed to the surface, gasping for air, trying to reorient himself as he looked up at his obliterated base. Realization flashed into his head. Arashi! She had been in there! Quickly, Robotnik pulled himself out of the water, calculating where she would be from what he observed of where pieces had been flying. Since she was in the living room, she would probably be in the northwestern part of the cave, by that huge pile of destruction... Racing over to the pile of twisted metal, he saw the couch, overturned, half of it destroyed. Pinned under it from the waist down was Arashi, sprawled on her back. "Arashi!" Robotnik yelled worriedly as he rushed to her, pulling the couch off of her. Gashes covered her body, and shards of metal were imbedded deep in her sides. Kneeling down next to her, he pulled her up into a half-sitting position, wincing when she cried out in pain. Grabbing the front of his coat, she gasped weakly for breath. "What... h-h..." "I don't know! Hang on, I'm going to go get medical supplies," he said, trying to keep his voice from shaking as he glanced over the serious wounds. As he moved to dash away, she tightened her grip on him. "No... I... I'll be dead by the time you... get back," she wheezed painfully, eyes shut tightly. "Stay here... please... don't let me die... alone..." Robotnik felt something icy grip his heart as he stared down at her in disbelief. "You can't be serious," he whispered shakily. "I've never... been so serious," she replied, a pained sound escaping her as it felt like daggers were stabbing her lungs with every breath. Robotnik tried his best to keep her still as he held her tightly in his arms. Pain made her take sharp breaths, and sharp breaths only produced more pain. Arashi weakened rapidly, Ivo staring down at her helplessly, not knowing what to do. After only about thirty seconds, she slowly became heavier in his arms, her head falling back as she mumbled something with her dying breath. "...crap, I forgot to check my email..." For what seemed like an eternity, Robotnik remained there, sobbing uncharacteristically in despair against Arashi's lifeless shoulder. Was this what it was like... to have feelings? To love somebody? Indeed, the highs were high, but the lows were unbearable... Suddenly, a voice from nearby grabbed his attention. "How touching," came the fairly bored-sounding British accent. The heartbroken scientist looked up to find Takar hovering in midair, smiling cruelly, his form glowing a neon green. Somehow, with only 5 chaos emeralds, he was in his Super Form. "You," Robotnik snarled, letting Arashi slump to the ground as he stood up. "You blew up my base! You destroyed everything! YOU KILLED ARASHI!" "Your point?" the Ykrian leader asked, examining his nails briefly. "I... HAVE HAD... ENOUGH OF YOU!" Robotnik screamed madly, his voice enraged and seemingly in physical pain for some reason. It sounded rather unnatural, causing Takar to glance up, quirking a brow. His expression went from triumphantly bored to slightly alarmed as the human started to glow a faint crimson. Robotnik groaned in agony, both mental and physical, reeling and holding his head. His uncontrollable rage was taking over every fiber of his being, and everything was in pain. All he could see was red, even when he closed his eyes, and eventually he fell to his knees with a scream as his hands exploded, instantly replaced by robotic ones. Searing, sharp pain traveled up his arms, only to leave immediately as cold steel and oil replaced flesh and blood. His form changed and shifted, growing rapidly, and normal teeth were shoved out of their sockets as needle-sharp, steel teeth moved to replace them. The rest of his body changed, steel replacing everything, a sputtering aura of electricity crackling around him. Finally, he stopped screaming as his clothing seemed to stick to him, tightening until it became one with him, the design becoming etched into his metal skin. Ultra Robotnik stood up slowly, training a stare of the greatest hate imaginable on his enemy, who was moving backwards in fear, sweat flying off his head. "H-h-how did you change with only two emeralds!?" the alien asked, terrified. "I was wondering something similar about you, lime boy," Ultra Robotnik replied, his voice filled with enough hate to vaporize any normal man. "The Ykrians... we can change with only 5, because we're more in tune with chaos than you humans... but... Oh, why did I bring those two back to life!? I had no idea they were just pieces of you! THAT must be how you defeat me!" "Pieces of me?!" the robot asked. "I ate them, you fool." Oh, god, this is worse than I thought, Takar thought to himself, suddenly very, very afraid. He really means business... And Sonic and Tails... I gave them some of my blood... that's how he managed to do it... Even Ultra Robotnik cringed at Takar's girlish screech of terror, but didn't wait long before he leapt at the alien, bent on revenge. Takar skidded hard across the sandy ground as the giant robot smashed into him, much like he did the first time they met. Only this time, there were no guards around to pull the hulking pile of metal off of him, and the beating started. Over and over, fists pounded into Takar's face, smashing it in, and while it regenerated every time, it certainly wasn't a pleasant experience. After about 30 punches to the face, Takar managed to throw Ultra Robotnik off of him and the two circled around each other, snarling. There is more than one type of snarl, however, and while Ultra Robotnik's was aggressive and nasty, Takar's was the sort that you'd see on a trapped, frightened animal. Leaping forward, the alien slammed a foot into Ultra Robotnik's midsection, hoping to pierce the armor with brute force. Instead, he received a broken ankle, and as he was falling to the ground, the raging mad scientist grabbed him by the legs. Takar flailed helplessly for a moment, wondering why Robotnik wasn't doing anything, until he felt a dozen cold, needle-like objects sink into his leg. "AAAAGH! HE'S GONNA EAT MEEEE! NOOOOoOooOOooOOO!" the alien screamed in terror, managing to flail enough to get out of the robot's grip, his wounds healing immediately. Then he decided that he was not going to lose. Leaping into the air, the alien fired a giant beam of chaos energy at Ultra Robotnik, who dodged it easily and leapt forward with a vicious punch to the gut. Takar went flying backwards, wind milling his arms as he splashed violently into the lake, and the robot was heading right for him. Giant barrels of some sort of gun replaced Robotnik's hands as he splashed into the water, firing homing torpedoes at Takar as he headed for him. The alien detonated the torpedoes prematurely with another beam of some sort, blowing them up in the robot's face, and one of his sensors was damaged along with his steel mustache, half of which got ripped off in the explosion. Temporarily stunned by the blast as he put most of his system resources into trying to repair the sensor, Ultra Robotnik was pelted with chunks of giant stones that ripped themselves out of the walls and floor of the lake, slamming into him and tossing him around. He decided he could still win with only one sensor, realizing that more important things were getting damaged, and rocketed towards Takar, ramming him with a headbutt that would have instantly killed a normal person. Distracted due to the blow, Takar stopped with the onslaught of boulders. The fight raged on with neither really winning, and suddenly Takar burst out of the water, followed close by Robotnik. The alien grinned down at his pursuer. "Instead of killing you, I think I'll make it so that there is no hope of you ever seeing Arashi again," Takar said. "What do you mean?" Ultra Robotnik asked, growling. "I mean I have a life-restoring device back at the lab... but I'm going to go destroy it," he said, cackling. "My race is the only one that can build these, using ancient talismans that are all gone save for one, Roboboy! And heck if I'm going to let you have any chance of accessing it!" The alien cackled madly, bursting through the shaft that he'd managed to open up, heading for the surface. Ultra Robotnik smirked and... doubled over in pain as electricity crackled around him. Crap! His teleportation mechanisms had been damaged! The race was on. ** Takar ran along, arms and legs pumping furiously, towards his base. Looking behind himself, he saw the ponderous machine clanking along slowly and laughed. "Piece of cake!" the alien thought to himself, and faced forward again, grinning evilly. Finally, Ultra Robotnik's jets had warmed up, and he shot forward, hovering over the ground slightly, seeming to slide on jets on the bottom of his feet as he moved as if rollerblading. The scene was hauntingly familiar, somehow. He started to catch up to Takar, who was too caught up in his supposed victory to be paying attention. Though the alien's speed remained pretty much constant, the robot's jets became stronger every moment, propelling him forward at well over Mach 3. Takar screeched as he felt metallic fingers clamp on the back of his neck. Running faster than the speed of sound didn't allow him to hear Ultra Robotnik closing in on him, and he was suddenly flung backwards several dozen feet, slamming into the ground hard and sliding painfully for quite a distance, getting a severe case of road rash. The robot continued forward with grim determination, setting grass ablaze as he sliced through it. Soon he was in the forest, completely ignoring trees as he ran right through them, leaving perfect cookie-cutter cutouts of himself in them, the huge chunks of busted-out wood clattering to the ground. His speed was up to Mach 4. A brilliant light burst out in front of him about a half of a mile, and Takar ran out of it, leaping over a few logs and boulders. Chaos control, the robot thought to himself, snarling. He sliced right through the boulders and logs in his efforts to catch up with the alien, who was quickly gaining speed in desperation. Having reached his top speed, Ultra Robotnik was unable to catch up with the alien, who had been propelled to his top speed quickly by the Chaos Control, before they got to the plains. He could see the boulder arrangement with the trapdoors now, and thought all hope was lost... Arashi... That's when Takar suddenly reverted to normal form, seeming to have run out of rings. He panicked, screaming, and tried to stop, his feet slamming into the very ruts that Sonic created not too long ago. Then he tripped at the end of the long ruts in the ground and flailed out of control, screeching as he went flying off into the distance. A parachute, like those on drag racers, burst out of Ultra Robotnik's back as he activated his reverse jets, the parachute helping to bring him to a stop much easier than the unfortunate alien who, by the time the robot had stopped, caused the entire world to shake yet again by wrapping himself around that same tree that Sonic met his end with. Such a nice tree, helping to stop people all the time... Just as Ultra Robotnik came to a stop, chunks of metal began to fall off of him, revealing his normal self underneath. He stumbled towards the trapdoor in the ground, various pieces of steel bouncing to the ground behind him, and when he had finally reverted completely to his normal self, he collapsed into the dust, exhausted, his hand on the trapdoor handle. ** When he woke up, it was late at night. Robotnik had a fitful sleep, with dreams of Arashi's death and related events replaying over and over in his mind, one nasty one in particular involving Takar winning the race and destroying the device. Slowly opening his eyes, the doctor spotted one of the chaos emeralds nearby. He felt weak as he reached over and picked it up with a shaking hand, tucking it in his pocket, and had to put some effort into pulling the trapdoor open. Once he got himself down into the lab, he saw the various devices--a high-tech computer, a large cabinet-like contraption, and some kind of sliding door at the back. For now, since it looked big enough to hold one or two people, his interests lay with the cabinet, and he sat down at the computer chair, fishing through a drawer for any sort of instruction manuals. Surprised that Takar learned from his mistakes with the Windows 98 book and apparently had organized his earth base, Robotnik pulled out the manual for the computer/cabinet combination, titled, "Life Box Instruction Manual." He flipped through it a couple pages, finding that there were only a few pages to the actual manual--most of the thick book was simply rewrites in Ykrian, English, Chinese, Greek, French, Spanish, German... The instructions read... Using the Life Box is a simple process. Place any DNA remnants of a person in through the cabinet doors and close the doors, then add whatever mutation agents you would like to the mixture by dropping them in the funnel on the side of the Life Box. Once you are done, run C:\DNA.EXE and make sure the being has changed as you wish. Then click the 'compile and run' button and wait. They should exit the cabinet shortly. To check what mutations a given agent will provide, just click on 'Mutations?' in the toolbar. It is possible to check your own DNA structure and distinct traits you have by stepping in the Life Box and pressing the 'scan' button on the keypad in there. Remain calm and still as the white beam moves over you, and when the green light on the keypad begins blinking, you can exit the Box and examine your file on the computer. You can also mutate yourself by adding the desired agents to the funnel, then stepping into the Box and pressing the 'Mutate' button. A gas will start to fill the Box--do not panic, its function is to put you to sleep. Trust us, if you attempted to change your DNA structure with the Box whilst still awake, you would seriously regret it after you recovered from the extreme pain. We are not responsible for any nasty things you end up doing to yourself with this. Just ask yourself how far you trust Windows XP to handle the files, and act accordingly. Robotnik looked at the computer and the Life Box. I trust Windows XP about as far as I can throw the planet, but it's my only chance. He investigated the sliding door, finding that it contained a hangar of sorts with a UFO in it. He walked under the small craft, which closely resembled the pod on the Steel Snake's back, and glanced up into the interior. Black leather, a nice control panel, a giant laser gun, a CD player... a pretty nice little vehicle all around. He pulled himself up into the cockpit and closed the door, examining the controls. There weren't very many, so they wouldn't be too hard to figure out. Pressing one button caused the laser beam to fire, blowing out half the wall. Robotnik jumped, then snickered to himself. "That was kind of cool," he mumbled idly, then tried another button. The hangar door above him opened. Must be the garage door opener! A few more buttons, and after smashing into the walls by putting it in the wrong gear, he was up and flying through the air. The ship was absolutely silent as it sped along towards his underground base. Robotnik was grim, trying not to get his hopes up, not knowing if the Life Box would really work as he brought the Steel Snake over from a pile of rubble. Miraculously it had survived the explosion, and he ditched the alien's pod for his own vehicle, strapping Arashi's lifeless body into the passenger seat. Then he began the trip back to the alien's base. ** The Life Box thrummed quietly as Robotnik clicked the 'compile and run' button. He watched the box hopefully for a moment, then turned his attention back to Arashi's file. It was rather interesting to see various traits of a person... like high intellect, mechanical aptitude, mathematical aptitude, excellent sense of humor, tendency towards evil, great kisser-- what the!? Thinking back, the doctor realized the computer was right, at least. A few seconds later, the Life Box stopped humming and the doors flew open, Arashi stumbling out, every wound healed. Robotnik sat, immobilized with shock. It worked. Something vitally important actually WORKED in Windows. Holy crap on a stick. The first amazed word out of Arashi's mouth: "COOL!" As the two looked at each other, Robotnik leapt out of his chair in slow motion. The few steps across the room to each other seemed to take forever, with a field of tall grass and sunshine as the background for the clip... Ah, yes, another corny reunion. At least they didn't yell pet names for each other. Evil Overlords, Even Those Who Have Been Thrown Way Out Of Character By Fanfic Authors With Strange Ideas, don't do pet names. We can only hope, anyway.

#TAYLOR SWIFT APPRECIATION LIFE

PART 6 - reputation

(part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5)

Listen. This was by far the hardest review for me to get going into properly. I love every single track on this album without exception, and it was SO HARD for me to come up with coherent comments to make on all of them.

But I think I managed alright, and we’re finally about to embark on the wild ride that is @taylorswift‘s 6th studio album, reputation.

Hang on tight, and please keep your arms and legs inside the ride at all times.

1. ...Ready For It?

No, Taylor, none of us were ready for this, not even a little bit.

Can we just talk about that introduction? like. What a way to kick off an album. This track grabs you by the hand and just pulls you along for the ride, like “get in losers”. That little throat clear at the beginning! the beat that drops off and lets her voice go all light and ethereal! This song is a wild ride from start to finish, and I love it. “Let the games begin” indeed.

And that MUSIC VIDEO!!! I want the rest of that movie, please.

I made a reaction video to this track/video and if you wanna check it out, click here

2. End Game

I love the synths at the beginning of this song, but I’ll be honest that Future’s verse took some time to grow on me. Ed’s verse and Taylor’s on the other hand? Boy. Those grabbed me from the start, as did the harmonies that are laced all through this track.

Is it just me or was this the first time she used the word enemies for the people she’s clashed with? I feel like that’s a new thing. 

I also reacted to this one when the video dropped, click here to watch

3. I Did Something Bad

Okay so first and foremost. Taylor Alison Swift, in the year of our lord 2017, swearing on a track out there in front of god and everybody. I feel like if there was any remaining ‘oh she’s just a sweet young thing’ attitude from anyone, this album shattered it to pieces in the best way.

The production on this track, I can’t even. This is an explosive track, it just hits you like a train and drags you along for the ride. There’s a bit on the way out of the track where she says “I did something bad” in a straight spoken voice and it is. Too much for this weak swiftie!

4. Don’t Blame Me

This sacrilegious hymn of a track. I swear. That almost broken electronic wavering synth behind the chorus. The choir effect on her voice. The stripped down beat-driven verse. The lyrics in general? My dude. I can’t. Also anyone who still thinks she has no range can physically fight me after that note after the bridge. That’s power is what that is.

Also can we talk about that behind the scenes clip of her filming the angry distant vocals for the chorus? I’m weak.

5. Delicate

Another thing I’m weak for is use of vocoder. And that beat that comes in for the verse! AND THAT LITTLE ‘delicate’ IN THE CHORUS!! kills me every single time. I’ll be honest here and say that the video for Delicate didn’t really grab me as much as some of the others, but the song itself certainly did.

Can we just. Talk for a second about how sad it is to think about that concept of ‘wow. you must really actually like me if you’re hanging around through all this mess.’ 

One of my favorite things in this track is the descending harmony behind “sometimes when I look into your eyes”. I always want to sing along with the harmony instead of the melody on that part because I find it so compelling.

6. Look What You Made Me Do

WHERE IT ALL BEGAN! that building drumline is absolutely gorgeous and I can’t not air drum to it - I don’t even play drums!

Also, yes, I am fully aware that I JUST SAID on the 1989 review that Out of the Woods was too repetitive for me, and here I am raving about this song which... honestly. Is just as repetitive if not more so. But this song just grabs me so much more and so instantly that I really get into the repetition (And maybe that has something to do with the familiarity because of the sampled melody).

That plinking lead line thing, and oh my god, the percussion on the second chorus. I can’t.

The old Taylor can’t come to the phone right now CAUSE SHE’S DEAD. And I feel like with lover about to come out, maybe we’re killing off yet another “old taylor”

click here for my reaction video

7. So It Goes...

I read somewhere that the tracks with the ellipses on them mark out the edges of the “side A” part of the album, and it’s the spot where things shift over to a different feeling, and I believe it.

Again, this track has absolutely outstanding production on it, the softness dropping into the driving beats, and the bridge. Oh my god. I’m still not over that whispered “1 2 3″. And that line “i’m not a bad girl but I do bad things with you’ reminds me of blank space and that “I can make the bad guys good for a weekend” it’s like the inverse of it.

Also welcome to the first track on this album that I refuse to let my dad listen to - “scratches down your back” indeed t a y l o r

8. Gorgeous

Adorable baby voice!! This song is so great, I love it to pieces. I love the sort of bitter quality about it and the way she’s taken how tumblr and twitter fandom talks about celebrities and made it just a mainstream piece of her song.

Also is that a bell like the kind they put on counters to get the attention of the person working? because I can’t help but hit the bell (air bell!) when it comes in and that’s what I always picture when I do so.

I can’t come up with anything more coherent so .... guess I’ll just stumble on home to my cats.... ;)

9. Getaway Car

More vocoder! I love. The wording in this song is so evocative and brings up such perfect, crisp mental images for me, and she applied that to perfect metaphors for the situation in question. I love the idea of how.... like. It’s a rebound relationship, right? but it’s the getaway car from the previous relationship. And really, you can’t be surprised when something like that doesn’t last as long.

Also that outro beat? Be still my heart!

10. King of My Heart

THIS SONG!!!! More gorgeous vocoder use, of course, but then also. So many little things about the lyrics that get me! “Salute to me, I’m your American queen” and “jag-u-ars” and the way she sings “luxury” and just!!! so much!

As for the musical side of things, I absolutely adore that really subtle acoustic guitar in the chorus, and the DRUMS in the post-chorus (or whatever you want to call that bit). They’re so full and almost feel-it-in-your-chest even just in headphones! (I’m still not sure I survived that concert)

11. Dancing With Our Hands Tied

Early on I had a half-baked theory that this song is about John Mayer, but the timeline doesn’t work at all, so... definitely not. Still though, think about it. “slow dancing in a burning room”/”swaying as the room burned down”

That aside, though, this song makes me think of the Halsey track Bad at Love if ONLY because of the theme of melancholy looking back at relationships that felt doomed from the start (or didn’t, as the case may be, I don’t know)

But also just. Taylor’s vocal performance on this song. Those ‘ad libs’ in the background of the final chorus have so much power in them.

12. Dress

And here we have the other Taylor song I won’t let my dad listen to. He would be scandalized to death by this song.

I love that lyric about the golden tattoo. I can’t really explain what it is about that line that gets me so much.

More beautiful production - something about the tracks on this album feels so grand for lack of better word. Plus there’s that moment in this song “say my name and everything just STOPS” and the whole thing goes silent... I will never forget the feeling of that line coming out and the way the whole stadium went dark.

13. This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

Ahhhhh I love this song. Gotta love a nice sassy Taylor style clapback, right? Beautiful.

“Feeling so Gatsby” is the best line for getting her point across. You don’t even have to be particularly familiar with the work that references, it just brings the opulence to mind effortlessly.

That laugh in the bridge though, and the tumbling low piano crash afterward, I love it so much. Again to reference the tour, it was such a great extended moment of laughter. So great.

14. Call It What You Want

This... Is probably my favorite track on the album, if I were pressed to name one. I adore this song so completely. I still get just emotionally overcome if I take the time to really pay attention to this song when it comes on. I love it so much, and it’s such a beautiful hopeful song. Like, yeah, my life’s been a right mess but it’s better now with you in it, and just.... this song fills me with feelings like that one animation in the lizzie mcguire movie. 90s kids, you know the one I mean. (lover, the song, gives me those same feelings, just amplified like 30x)

The smile in her voice on “yes” can almost bring me to tears all by itself.

my reaction video can be found here

15. New Year’s Day

Speaking of beautiful mushy-feelings-bringing tracks... The fact that these two are paired back to back like this is just bringing both barrels to my emotions. Gosh.

At the show, I’d taken my shoes off literally two songs prior - I was the girl carrying her shoes in the lobby.

I love so much that it’s just her with a piano and then a little bit of guitar, and those soft self-harmonies on some parts - “please don’t ever become a stranger” reminds me of Enchanted.

This song will without fail make me cry because it’s just so soft and I’m so happy for her. I can’t believe how long it’s been and she’s so happy and in love and. Even when this song came out. Gosh.

We did it, yall. We’ve made it up to date, and it’s almost time for Lover to come out! I don’t know about you, but I’m not ready. My emotions aren’t ready. Gosh.

Anyway, thanks for coming along with me on this ride. See you on the other side of the release!

“You’re so silly, I love you”

Requested by @teenageguitarist  

Based on one of my favorite scenes from my favorite show, Friends.

Everyone knew that Mondays were boring as fuck, it was no secret, they came after everyone’s praised weekend and somehow this day always seemed like the longest day ever. But not today. It was indeed Monday, but not only that, it was the day my boyfriend and his band were releasing their last album and that deserved a celebration.

It obviously had to happen at Ashton’s place, with happened to be right beside ours and it was a little bigger than our place, plus, out of everyone in the band, he was the one that was more excited for this new record, he poured his heart out on this, throwing out a party almost felt like a necessity.

It was fun. We drank, we danced, we laughed. Just like a good party should be, so naturally, after a good few hours of a full house of people drinking and messing around, people started leaving, it was the start of the week and a lot of them have things to do the next day, it’s totally fine, we only got left with the same old group of friends, the ones that would be around no matter what and the ones we could always count on for a good laugh. It felt like home to have them here.

We were currently sitting on Ashton’s living room, I was comfortably leaning on Calum’s embrace, while everyone else was sitting around in a circle, the lights were low around us and there was music in the background playing so softly. I was holding back a laugh from seeing our friend Mitchy prank calling some guy who worked with him, telling him something about winning a new X box or something like that. Lame joke, but I found it really funny.

He ended up hanging up the call after five minutes of keeping it up, we moved on our little truth or dare game, something kind of childish to do, but always really fun.

“Okay, so (Y/n), truth or dare?” Mitchy points at me since it was his turn to pick someone.

“Truth” I answer lazily, I was starting to grow a little tired, since it was already almost 3 in the morning and I barely slept before. I was not totally in the mood for dares.

“Boring” someone calls out to me, I don’t even see who it was.

“Hey” Calum says frowning a little and rubbing on my arm.

Mitchy seems to really think about it, there are not many things that you can ask in truth or dare, let’s be real, in this dumb games if you weren’t creative enough you would end up asking the same old questions everyone always asked. That is exactly what he didn’t do “Tell us about something you did years ago and you haven’t told anyone about” he says in a daring tone. I was really not expecting that.

“Woah, that’s very specific” I hear Michael say from the other side of the room.

“Yeah, where’s that coming from?” I ask him with a frown, it was such a weird question.

“She chose truth, I literally can’t think of anything else to ask” he excused himself.

“You don’t have to answer”  Calum whispers in my ear before kissing my head.

I think about it for a second, yes I technically don’t have to answer such a thing if I don’t want to and take a dare instead, but there’s something I need to say, maybe this is the time now that he brought this up. Nothing too harmful I guess, it’s just something that happened, I’ve been keeping this for myself for a while, we were all friends here, there’s no harm in saying it now.

“No, it’s fine” I smile up to Calum and move a little, sitting straight by his side “Well, Okay” I sigh, really thinking on what I was about to say, but there was no turning back now “Do you remember that time when we were in Australia and I was just starting to work with you?” I ask him.

“Yeah?” He nods with a confused look “Before we were dating?” He asks me.

“Yes”  I nod. My hands were shaking a little.

I give a deep sigh and close my eyes. I start talking.

I remember that day clearly because it was fucking scary. I was 18, maybe 19 at that time, the truth is I don’t remember but I was young.

I was just starting my job as a general assistant for the band’s team, I would help anyone with what they needed, no matter what it was. It was my second, maybe third week working on this and to be honest, I was having such a blast, I loved my job.

I remember to be helping the merch guy to load up the little stores around the venues. There tons of boxes around and we needed to put every single one of them in place before show time, I was not the only helping on this. My boss, Mark came up to me that day, catching me just walking through the doors that lead backstage and just getting to the store closer to the stage.

“(Y/n), are you busy right now?” He asked me with a friendly smile when he saw me.

“Em, no, not really” I lie, putting the box down on the store counter, If I could do something better than carrying boxes I would take that chance, I wasn’t in total shape and I hated carrying heavy things “I was just helping Gary with all these” I say pointing at the heavy box beside me.

“Okay cool” he nods and gives a step closer “I need you to do something for me” he says and pulls a phone from his pocket  “See this?”   “Yep” I nod.

“It’s Ella’s phone” he explained, I knew Ella, she was the one that always helped with all the photography stuff, she’s nice “She has some footage in there, recordings, everything, even those edited tour diary videos” he explains “Just put it all of it on your laptop, save it, and send it to me” he Instructs me, handing me the phone quickly and stepping back to do whatever he had to do “Uh, also make sure to find the clue images to post on twitter and program it to be posted in an hour or so” he adds up, walking away.

“You got it” I say loud enough so he could hear me.

“Thanks, Kiddo” “Anytime!” I call back, walking to a whole different way than I was before.

I remember how quickly I got to the green room, which was the room right beside the catering. I grabbed my laptop and turn it on, taking my USB cable to plug the phone into the computer. It was such a weird moment, there was exactly what Mark said there was, footage, videos of the guys, pictures, but right beside one of the clues pictures I had to post on twitter, there’s was a really low-quality video showing on screen, it looked like a screen recording from the camera of another phone or this phone.

Out of pure curiosity, I click on the video, it’s my computer, after all, no one would find out. It started as a weird video (indeed a screen recording) of a boy that not only didn’t showed his face but showing off his body from the neck down. It was such a short video, around 10 seconds, but it was clear, the boy in the video took the hem of his pants and pulled it down, showing off his boner in a very clear picture before the image went back to an app main menu.

“Oh, what the hell?” I sighed with a big frown. what the actual hell?. I play the video one more time, trying to take a guess on who was the person in it, but it doesn’t take me long to find out, because I recognized that big tattoo on his arm, that big bird in black ink was really ringing a bell, that boy was Calum “Oh my god” I almost wanted to exclaim my cheeks getting redder and redder “Bitch” I groan, playing the video one more time, there was a laugh at the end. Ella’s laugh, what a fucking bitch. She recorded Calum’s dick. Bitch.

I try to take my mind off what I just saw as I do the exact thing that my boss told me to do, I sent him the videos, post things he told me to, but somehow I found myself looking at that video again, who the hell would do something like this and save it up along with videos of the band that was to be public, Obviously someone who’s brain was as big as a peanut or smaller than ant. I don’t know what I should but I was definitely going to delete that video.

I click on the video image on the screen and click again, showing all of the options that I could do to this footage, I was just about to delete it, but I hear my name being called once and then again, I look up and click the option without looking to then immediately shut my computer down.

“(Y/n)?” I hear a voice call me again and enter the room. Speaking of the devil. “Yeah?” I say with a very fake smile “Oh hi, Calum” I say putting my computer aside. He smiles back to me “Hey, I thought I heard you here” he says walking into the room towards the mini bar “What are you up to?” I hesitate a little to answer “I’m just here” I shrug “hanging out” “Oh” he nods talking out a water bottle and opening it up  “Listen, I still have like an hour or two before I have to go on stage, I was wondering if you wanted to, you know, join me and go for coffee or something?” he says smiling and taking a sip of his water, he already looked ready to go for stage and he was now asking me out.

Isn’t he dating, Ella? “What?” I say for myself, but I snap out of my temporary trance before he thought I was crazy or something  “I mean, Yeah, I would love to” I smile at him, my blushed, that’s embarrassing. “Nice” he says with a very wide smile “should we go then?” he says pointing to the door. “Yeah, yeah, I Just- I need a second, I’m finishing something, I’ll be done in a minute” I say, almost sounding rushed and I was not lying, I still had to send Mark a couple of videos. “Okay”  he nods “I’ll wait for you outside then” “Okay” I nod back, to then wait for him to leave the room.

I wait to open my laptop until I hear the door shutting, I am very quick, I open my computer and go to my previous job, sending in what needed to be sent in, but I notice something weird, the moment I go to my twitter profile sitting right beside my mail is literally blowing up, not in a bad way, I guess, I have like a thousand followers, I was not popular. I scroll down and see what’s happening.

I hit send, not delete. Fuck.  I’m stupid. “Shit, shit, shit” I curse under my breath, my hands are shaking so bad that I barely knew what I was doing  “No, don’t do this to me” I say going to my profile and immediately deleting that video. about 20 people have already liked this. then realisation came “I’m gonna lose my job” “(Y/n)?” I hear calum call me out and I just close my laptop.

“Coming”  I call out and get up my sit, taking the phone with me and leaving my computer away “I’m ready, let’s go”

So, that was the day he first asked me out, along with the day I almost ruin his career. This is fucked up.

“You posted my nudes?” He said in a not very happy tone. I don’t blame him if it was me I would be mad too. “It was you?” I hear Luke ask in surprise. “I’m so sorry, okay?” I panic, getting up my seat “I didn’t mean to do that before I could delete it some people already had the video” I explain, but I could tell this was not getting any better “it was an accident” “People kept making fun of me for months” Calum says getting up his seat too and almost trying to control himself from yelling “The management team went hammed on me because of it, you know that, I was so dead nervous thinking you would think badly of me for that shit” He groaning “And I didn’t” I exclaim, almost like if that was the good side of the story “listen, Calum I’m so sorry” “Why didn’t you tell me this?” He shakes his head, he’s disappointed at me. I shrugged and look down “Because of I kind of ignored it” I mumble “I didn’t want you to freak out” “Well, I am freaking out now!” he exclaims at me and I flinch, I wasn’t scared, just surprised that he suddenly raised his voice, I didn’t like when he did that “I am so sorry baby” I say looking up at him and trying to hug him but he walks back, getting away from my hold. “Well a ‘sorry’ doesn’t cut it, I can’t believe you did that” he says shaking his head even more “Fuck this, I’m sorry, I’m gonna go” He says and with that, he just turns around to leave. “Calum” I walk towards me but he almost marches straight to the door. “Don’t follow me”  he groans, to then walk out of his best friend’s house. I stand on my feet, not giving a single step towards him, he’s really mad at me and that was never good. So I decide to not push it for a little while and wait for him to cool down a least a little. I just hope he doesn’t break up with me over this. I really hope he didn’t. “Shit, (Y/n) I feel so bad, I’m sorry” Mitch’s says, clearly apologizing for doing that question in first place. “It’s okay” I say giving him a sad smile “I guess this had to be told someday, anyways” I shrug “I think I should go now” I say walking starting to walk out but before I could give a full step, Crystal, Michael’s girlfriend, grab my arm. “Do you want me to keep you company for a while?” She kindly offers. “No, thanks, Crys” I say with a shrug “I guess I’ll try to talk to him” I say and she nods at my answer “thanks for having us, Ashton” I wave my hand at me. “Anytime, good luck” he says with a kind smile. Good luck. That’s the best thing someone could tell me right now, cause I was fucking nervous.   Walking home isn’t really a long way and I can tell Calum literally ran home because I don’t run into him on my way back. I left just a minute before he did, I should have at least see him enter the house, which I didn’t, however, the lights were on, he was clearly in there. I unlock the door with my keys and close the door behind me, I don’t even have to take a guess of where he Is because he always goes to the same place when he’s upset. The music studio. I walk to the door of his studio upstairs. It’s quiet inside, so I guess he’s just digesting what just happened, makes sense. I know twice and I hear his groan at the other side of the door. “Open up” I say softly. “Go away” “Calum, really, open up” I say grabbing the door knocker but the door is completely locked “I’m sorry okay?  That happened years ago, let it go” I say as if that was going to make him be less mad at me. “How can I just let it go?” He exclaims and I flinch, he’s raising his voice again “You could have ruined my reputation” “I know,I’m sorry” I mumble and knock again “Just open up, talk to me” I beg but he ignores me. I ran out of words to say and I feel like I have no other way to Ale him happy again. But oh wait, there is one way, one really stupid and strange way of making him happy again. I can’t believe I’m doing this. I clear my voice for a second and prepare my voice for what I’m going to do. “(Y/n) says she’s sorry and she shouldn’t have done that”  I say I’m a very high and awkward voice I only did when I was joking around with him “it was a big mistake and she won’t ever ever do that again” I hear him groan and little and walk to the door, opening it up and looking awkwardly at me “What are you doing?”  He asks “She feels really bad for not telling you” I keep talking in that voice, I could see somehow it was making all of this a bit better. “Are you really imitating Tommy pickles to make me feel better?” He asks crossing his arms over his chest. “Well” I shrug, keeping my voice high pitched “a baby’s gotta do what a baby’s gotta do” He tries to keep his face still but I can see his smile starting to crack and breaking up into a full-on laugh, it felt like music to my ears, just beautiful. “Did I do it?” I say in my normal voice with a big smile on my face. “Oh my god” he says in between laughs, looking at me like I was the greatest thing that ever made him laugh “you’re so silly, I love you” he says and I (literally) freeze. “What?” I ask, my face can’t help but smile. That was the best thing he has ever said. In all of these years we’ve been dating he’s never told me such a thing, it had nothing to do with me, it was just him, he wanted to be sure that he would say those three words to the right person and believed that saying it marked a very important phase in the relationship. I respected that, and hearing him say it to me felt special. “Nothing” he says, starting to freak out “I said you’re silly and then I just stopped talking” My hands are covering my face and then my mouth, I point at his chest and make him give a step back, his eyes were wide in surprise, he was totally weird out by this “You said you love me, I can’t believe this” “No, I didn’t” he denies “Yes, you did” “No, I didn’t” “You love me!” I exclaim in emotion, while he keeps freaking out. “No, I don’t” he freaks out  “Stop it, Stop it, Stop it” he says running his hand through his hair and giving a step back. “You Stop it!” I laugh, my eyes were filling up with tears. “Oh my god, you love me” “Okay well, yeah! I do” he says in realizations to then look at me “Are you crying?” He says softly, walking to me. “I’m so happy” I cry, feeling him pull me into a hug “you finally said it” “I did” he said running my back softly “I’m sorry I freaked out” he apologizes “I’m sorry about the video” I said back, looking up at him. “It’s fine I guess” he shrugs  “it happened a long time ago” “But I’m truly sorry about it” I apologize once again, crying into his chest. “I know” he says softly to then caress my hair “stop crying” he chuckles, caressing my head really softly. “I can’t” I laugh a little, I really couldn’t stop crying  “Calum?” “Yeah” he mumbles in response. “I love you, too” I say and look up at him with my already red eyes. “I know” he says, kissing my forehead “I know” We stay quiet for a good while, embracing each other and feeling the warmth of the moment, it was definitely a weird night, but thankfully, it turned out better than what it could have been. All I needed to know here was that we now know how much we love each other, and that was more than enough. Well, that’s really all I need.

That Woman Over There - Chapter 23

A You Me and Him Fix-it Fic

Rating: Teen, for some mature themes

Word count: 3832

Warnings: none

Summary: ~ Set after the birth of Monty, Olivia’s baby ~ A dear friend of Olivia comes to visit for a week, and she disturbs the fragile peace between her, Alex, and John.

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 | Chapter 10 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 12 | Chapter 13 | Chapter 14 | Chapter 15 | Chapter 16 | Chapter 17 | Chapter 18 | Chapter 19 | Chapter 20 | Chapter 21 | Chapter 22 |

Alex slammed into the gallery, cursing. She forgot to bring a damn umbrella, of all things. She shook herself off and threw down her bag. Rainwater dripped off it, to the parquet floor. The place was eerily dark. She wondered whether it was on purpose. She sniffed at the air. It smelled a bit like John’s house.

Her chest burned. “Fuck,” she said out loud. She wondered whether he hated her, and whether she’d ever smell his house again. She looked around and noticed pieces of art in pools of light. She walked to the closest one.

A painting. Fleshtones. Abstract, but the image began to take form in her brain almost immediately. Bodies. There was something about the sumptuous curves of the negative spaces … but she felt like she was missing something. The paint had a matte quality, a texture that fascinated her.

“It looks like living, breathing flesh, no?”

“Goddamnit!” she said, jumping aside. A lithe man in a striped t-shirt and a pair of jeans stood behind her.

He stood beside her and smiled a cheshire cat grin that was oddly nostalgic. He hugged his slim arms.

“Flesh, no?” he repeated.

“Yes, but there’s something off. I can’t tell where one body ends and the other begins,” she said. Her heart was only slowing now. He drifted the scent of cedar to her. Cedar and … violet? Her eyes drifted to him again. He wore a neat goatee and mustache, and his eyes were the color of his hair - golden brown.

He nodded, and stretched. His shirt rode nearly to the bottom of his ribcage. His smooth belly flexed. His jeans rode low on his hips, and she saw so much happy trail it made her blush.

“You can look away at any time,” he said, giving her a half grin. She didn’t know she was staring. “Not that I mind. You’re cute.”

Her cheeks were hot. Whether it was embarrassment or something else, she didn’t care to figure out.

“You are Alex?” he said, turning to her.

“How’d they get the paint to look like that?” she said, looking back at the painting.

“I don’t know how she does it. That’s why it’s here,” he said.

“Ah,” she said. “Yeah. I’m Alex.” She held out her hand. Again, he smiled as they shook hands.

“How professional,” he said. “You’ve got a firm handshake.”

She shrugged. “Want to see my work?”

“Of course. No more flirting. Straight to business.”

“I’m not flirting,” she said, walking to her bag and digging in it for her laptop. “I’m-” she stopped. She was going to say she was gay. But it wasn’t true. At least, not all the way true. But she could still say it. She gave him a sidelong glance. She decided against it.

“You’re what?” he said. “Taken? If so, I’m sorry.”

She frowned. “No. Not taken.” She coughed.

He nodded. “Come, let’s go upstairs. There’s more light in my flat.” He walked to the far corner. He opened a door to an elevator.

“It’s one of those fancy personal ones,” she said as she entered behind him.

“Yeah. I don’t want a nosy visitor finding their way to my personal space,” he said. He punched in a code. It moved up smoothly. She caught another whiff of cedar.

“Again, you’re sniffing,” he said, smiling.

“Oh. Yeah. You smell a lot like a friend of mine,” she said, smiling bashfully.

“You close?” he said, opening the door. Beyond, was open space with islands of tasteful furniture.

“He’s my best mate,” she said. She hoped it was still true.

“He has good taste, then.”

“It’s not a perfume. It’s, uh, he works with wood, so the smell sticks to him.”

“Carpenter?” he said as he guided her to what looked like an office.

“Artist,” she said confidently. “He makes beautiful things. Precious things. You know, keepsakes.”

“Ouiai,” Alphonse said, and offered her a seat in front of his computer.

“The screen big enough for ye?” she said, and chuckled. It was at least 45 inches.

“I use this to view art,” he said.

“Sure, mate. Art.” she said, and handed him her USB with a sardonic grin she couldn’t wipe off.

His lips trembled with mirth. “You’re not terribly formal, are you?” he said.

“Should I be? This isn’t like, a proper interview, is it?” she said, and slung a leg over the arm of the office chair. “This chair’s rad, by the way. It’s ergonomic, right?”

“Maybe not how you’re using it,” he said. The screen came on and she lost her balance and fell back.

“Holy fuck! I can see colors I didn’t even know existed,” she said, crawling back up to the desk and standing up. “Sorry about the language.”

“Speak however you like. This isn’t the Vatican,” he said.

She looked over his shoulder.”There’s the folder with my work.”

She swore when he clicked on the first photo. “That’s bloody gorgeous,” she said. “Okay, you’re absolutely right. This screen is a requirement. All I’ve got is my mam’s grotty little 200 quid laptop. I can see every single brush stroke with this thing.” She leaned forward. “It’s brilliant.”

“Now you see the method to my madness,” he said.

“Yah, I do. It’s definitely not just for porn,” she said. She nodded.

He burst out laughing. “You have absolutely no filter, do you?” he said.

“Why? Should I? I have a feeling the posh art buyers might cringe at me, eh?” she said.

“Maybe you’re not the affected art school type, but it honestly doesn’t matter. Most of them don’t even know what they’re looking at anyway. They just buy to say they did. It’s very rare to find collectors with an actual eye for talent. That’s where I come in.”

“You’re an art dealer,” she said, emphasizing the last word. “You make the good shit available to ‘em.”

“Exactly,” he said. 

“You scare your fancy customers down there?”

“You were in my space,” he said.

“You could’ve made noise walking up, like normal people.”

He crossed his legs, and she noticed that he was barefoot. “Again, my space.”

She smiled. “Sorry. But I almost wee’d myself.” She squirmed.

“You need the loo?” he said.

“I think so,” she said. He pointed to a frosted glass cube in a corner of the apartment. She sighed. “Seriously?”

He winked. He watched her walk away. She was a bit rough around the edges, but her honesty was refreshing. Perhaps he had been around posh art students for too long. Even her shape was more inviting – curvy in places where so many others had on-trend angles.

“This is ridiculous,” she yelled as she closed the glass door behind her. “There’s no privacy whatsoever.”

“I live alone,” he said. He felt strange yelling in his own apartment.

“And when you have … guests?” she said.

“I don’t really hold parties in this space – any guests here are usually beyond that kind of embarrassment.”

“Oh. Yeah,” she said, and flushed. She looked around. There was a large shower in front of her, also glass. It was fancy in a way that made her uncomfortable. She couldn’t imagine washing her body in a place like that. And it was a place, not just a shower. The chrome fixtures gleamed, and the bottles on the shelf were not in English. She wondered whether they smelled like wood. She washed her hands, saw no towel, and dried them on her shorts. She felt weird letting the water dry on the sink. It would get spots.

“Hey, do you wipe down the sink?” she said as she walked back up.

“Shhhhhhh,” he said. He leaned forward, looking intently at one of her blue period pieces. At least, that’s what she called it. It was not naturalistic, but also not as abstract as some of the pieces she saw downstairs. “Viens-ici,” he said, and beckoned to her. “Tell me about this.”

She took a deep breath. “It’s the last piece I painted before I stopped for a while. I just sort of … sat in front of a canvas and let the brush do the talking.”

“Yes, it speaks volumes,” he said. He hugged himself again. “What’s most striking is that although the composition hints at desolation, you did not use the stereotypical washed out palette. It’s searingly bright.”

“I couldn’t stand using muted colors.” She echoed his action, hugging herself. “She deserves better than shades of gray.” She shivered.

“She?” he said.

“Jo,” she said softly.

“An ex?” he said.

“My daughter, who died last year right before being born.”

He gasped.”Ah, petite. J'en suis désolé,” he said. He patted her hand, and for some reason, she burst into tears again. He stood and hugged her. She wrapped her arms around his narrow frame and wept into his chest.

“I’m a mess. I’ve had the worst day ever. I think I just lost everything.”

“How do you mean?” he said.

It surprised her that he even cared. She didn’t know where to start. He was a stranger, so lying wasn’t worth the effort.

“My fiancee just broke up with me. She was right to do it. And I just fucked up my relationship with my best mate. At least, if he’s got any sense.”

“Eh,” he said. He didn’t expect the full truth. She was extraordinary.

“When you say “just”, do you mean in the last month or something?” he said. He rubbed her back. Her hair smelled like cigarette smoke and satsuma.

“I mean, today. Earlier.”

He pulled her away to look at her. “Putain. And you’re here?”

“I’ve got nothing left … what’s your name again?” She wiped her face with her arm.

“Alphonse. You can call me Alfie if you like.”

“Alfie. Sounds posh,” she said. “You don’t like Alphonse?”

“I’m named after my dad. He’s as asshole,” he said.

“‘Least you know ‘im,” she said, and sniffed.” I’ll call you Alfie, then. Don’t wanna be bringing back any bad memories. I don’t usually get like this.” She finished wiping her eyes, but her lips still quivered.

“You want a beer?” he said.

“God yes,” she said. He ran to the kitchen space and opened a giant fridge built into a brick wall “Jesus, man, got enough space in there?” she said. There was actual food in it. Like John, he liked to cook.

“You peckish? I’ve got some leftover cold sesame noodles,” he said, putting two bottles of beer on the counter. She shrugged, but approached the counter, curious. He pulled out a plastic tub and opened it.

“It’s not takeaway,” she said. The noodles were glossy with oil, and dotted with toasted sesame seed and green onion. “Smells amazing.”

“I made them for dinner. As ever, I made too much. I suppose some habits die hard,” he said, and handed her a fork.

“Cooking a lot?” she said around a mouthful of noodles.

“Adjusting to cooking for one again,” he said, and sat on a stool opposite her. “Tell me more about that piece. I noticed that it’s unfinished. Or am I wrong?”

She took a sip of her beer. “That’s perceptive,” she said. “This is delicious, by the way. Better than from a restaurant.”

“Merci,” he said. “I have a mild obsession with asian cuisine.”

“Was your ex girlfriend from there?” she said, taking another generous mouthful.

“Perceptive,” he said. She winked. “No, she isn’t. She’s Portuguese. But she’s a chef who specializes in pan-asian cuisine. She got me hooked.”

“She’s a chef? If I dated a chef I’d gain two stone in a year,” she said. “I’d wear it as a point of pride.”

He laughed. “I wish, but I can’t. Genetics won’t really let me gain much of anything. Some might consider it a blessing. I guess it is.” He shrugged.

“Uhuh,” she said. “I was like that until I hit 25. After that, things started happening in this area,” she said, gesturing to her middle.

“I’m quite a few years over that, and nothing’s happened yet,” he said.

“How old are you?”

“39,” he said.

“Really? You look amazin’, bruv,” she said. She blushed at the ease with which she gave him the compliment, but she didn’t regret it. He beamed.

“I avoid sunlight whenever possible,” he said.

“Okay, Nosferatu,” she said. She looked at the sweating bottle of beer in front of her. She liked him. He seemed like a good bloke, and he hadn’t acted funny when she burst into tears. She didn’t know what she expected when she came, but definitely not him. She looked at him. His eyes were gold, with flecks of green near the iris. It was one of her favorite color combinations.

“You’re staring again,” he said. She was so zoned in she didn’t see his smile.

“Your eyes. The green is nice,” she said, then stuffed her hands in her pockets.

“Thanks. My maman has Persian blood. I get my eyes from her,” he said. “And in more ways than one. She’s the artist. My father thinks art is a hobby.”

She snorted. “My mam’s the same. She thinks I should go to school to become a nurse’s assistant. But I can’t stand the sight of blood. I’m working on being a teacher, maybe.”

“Maybe?” he said, opening another beer for her. She took it gratefully.

“Liv, my fi-my ex-fiancee, suggested it. She had a baby too, Monty. He’s the sweetest little guy you’ll ever meet. He’s gonna be one year old in a month and a half.” She took a deep swig of beer. Her eyes started to swim again. He walked beside her.

“He’s going to be one. And you said you lost Jo last year…” he said.

“It’s a hella long story, mate,” she said. “And you’re a stranger.”

“I’ve got an empty dance card and a case of beer,” he said, walking to a nearby sofa. “Let’s get acquainted.”

She stared out one of his large windows. The night was setting in, and it was pouring rain.

“I think we should wrap up the art stuff. It’s pissing outside and I’ve got to take a train back to Bristol...” her voice failed. She didn’t know where she was gonna go once she got there. She would have to speak to Olivia, then her mam. She dreaded the latter far more than the former.

“I can give you a ride to the station, if you like,” he said.

“Ah,” she said. “You that bored that you wanna listen to my long list of fuck ups?” she said. She sat on the other side of the sofa. She wished she could kick off her boots.

“Don’t be so hard on yourself,” he said.

“You just wait till I get into it, boyo,” she said.

“So that means you’ll stay for a bit,” he said. “I will open my ears and refrain from any possible censure until you’re done.”

“Century what?” she said, making a face.

“Censure. It means a strong or vehement expression of disapproval.”

“Huh. Whatever.” She looked down at her lap. She looked so lost. It made him want to stroke her rain-frizzy blond hair. She broke up with her fiancee just today, yet here she was, braving wind and rain to show him her worth. It was beyond his capacity to understand. He had not gotten out of bed for three weeks after Lorena left him, and it had been over two months until he was able to face the world. It was still difficult to adjust. She had been his life for six years.

“Where are you?” he said.

“I couldn’t finish it,” she said, tracing the shapes printed on her tights. She took a deep breath. He waited patiently. “At the time. It was, like…”

He moved a little closer, but made sure to give her plenty of space.

���It was like admitting she was finished. That her story was over,” she said. “I couldn’t bear it.” She hiccuped, but kept her composure. “I don’t even know why that’s in there. It’s a mess.”

“You keep saying that,” he said.

“Because it’s true. My life’s a mess. My work. My brain. They’re all one great big horrible mess.”

“You also said it’s unfinished,” he said softly.

“The painting? Yeah.”

“You don’t get me,” he said. He used his hands to speak, and it was beautiful to see. “I mean, it’s unfinished. Your life. Your brain. You. You’re young, no?”

“Old enough to know better about things, though,” she said, crossing her arms.

“You haven’t told me your unforgivable trespasses, but obviously not,” he said.

Her mouth dropped open.

He smiled. “I know you can’t see it from the inside looking out, but I have faith in you. You’ll right the wrongs of which you speak.”

“You don’t know me, bruv,” she said, taking a sip of beer. “I’m, like, the queen of fuckups.”

“That’s why it’s faith. If 2.2 billion Christians can believe in an invisible God, I can believe you’re not an incorrigible fuck up.”

She scratched her head. This bloke was something else. She rolled her eyes and gave him a half-grin.

“Alright. But you haven’t heard what I did yet,” she said.

“Will it explain the mystery of you and your ex being with child at the same time at some point? I am very rudely curious about that. Did you do it on purpose?”

“No,” she said loudly. “I didn’t.”

“Okay,” he said, and stretched his legs out. “We’re getting to the meat of the story.”

“I’ll bore you with my stupidity, but what does this have to do with my art?”

“We’ll figure it out along the way,” he said. “Talk to me.”

“Whatever. So my girlfriend got pregnant without telling me. I was really angry, and I got blind drunk and got off with our next door neighbor, John…”

“Wait. You’re gay?” he said.

She bit her lip. This was the first time she was going to say it out loud to someone she didn’t really know. But considering the stuff she was sharing, it couldn’t be that bad.

“I’m bi. I go both ways,” she said. She paused, as if waiting for peals of thunder and lightning, but the rain continued, silent and dark. “I didn’t know it at the time. But that comes later.”

“I see,” he said. “Take your time. I’m here all night.”

“Yeah. So, all it took was one night, and I was well preggers.”

“By the neighbor? Fuck,” he said. “And he was okay with it?”

“John? We became best mates during the pregnancy. He was in love with me or whatever, but we dealt with it. Now he’s in love with Connie.”

“What?” he said up. “So your ex girlfriend got pregnant without telling you. Then, you got off with your neighbor John, got pregnant after one night, and you’re still living by each other?”

“Yep,” she said.

“And now Encarnacion is with John, the father of Jo, and in love? Wasn’t she with Ella?

“Her and Ella went kaput last year. Big drama – at least, the bits I heard. Super messy.”

“I believe you now,” he said, eyes wide. He had to call Encarnacion. Her and Ella had once felt as immutable as a mountain. But Vesuvius most probably felt the same to the Pompeiians. “You remained friends?”

“Of course. Even after Jo. Like I said, he’s my absolute best mate. Or, possibly, was.”

“If you could endure that triangle, what happened to break it?”

She looked out the window again. She wondered what he was doing. Connie, most probably. He deserved happiness. She couldn’t get the indignant look on his face when she confessed. She never wanted to see that look on his face again.

“Oh,” he said softly. “Oui.”

“What?” she said, snapping out of her train of thought.

“You developed feelings for him. That’s why you broke up with your fiancee.”

She kicked off her books and started pacing the open space in front of the window.

“I’ll have you know she broke up with me,” she said. “He’s the father of my girl,” she said. “Jo was ours.”

“You said he was in love with you. What happened to change that?”

She snorted. “I’m a fool. A damn fool.” His brows rose. “He moved on. I suppose to keep his sanity, but he did. Fully.”

“With Encarnacion,” he said.

“Who is Olivia’s best friend,” she said.

He brightened up. “How is Olivia? She was a hell of a drinking buddy, back in the day.”

“Drinking buddy, huh? Of course,” she said, but she didn’t ask. It was just another story Liv hadn’t bother to tell her. “She’s fine, I hope.”

“You’ve given me only the blurb, but it already sounds like a hell of a story,” he said.

She sat on the windowsill, which was lined with silk pillows. “I think I’ll need something stronger than lager to really get into it,” she said. She held out the half-empty beer bottle.

“I’ve got vodka in a freezer,” he said, taking it.

“That’s good. Pour a drop of juice in. I’m still nursing a hangover.”

“As one does,” he said with a smile, and handed her a glass. He sat against the wall, at her feet. “So, start at the beginning.”

“At the actual beginning, or when everything got fucked?”

“At the very beginning,” he said, nursing his beer. He was a believer that you could tell a lot by a person by the kind of conversation they had. There are people who could talk your ear off for hours, but in the end, you didn’t know them any better. And there were people like Alex – open to a beautiful fault. He already knew he would be crazy about her. Whether it was romantically or not, he couldn’t ascertain now. But he’d know soon enough.

“I met Olivia online, on a dating site. I’d joined as a gag, but in less that 24 hours, I had over 30 messages…”

They talked until dawn, and in the interim, he figured it out.

Next Chapter

Das Gebrochen Arzt (The Broken Doctor): Chapter 2

Schneep clipped the name tag onto his white doctor’s coat as he walked towards the hospital. He nodded his head to a co-worker who was walking in, giving a friendly good morning. When he opened the doors he took in the familiar scent of antibiotics, bleach, and medicine. He picked up his clipboard as he walked through the door to the lounge.

He smiled at his fellow co-workers, some were familiar but he did not really know them on a personal level. However, as he walked past a group of students he spotted Suzi.

Suzi was a good friend of his, someone he could have a cup of coffee with and chat about life.

“Hello Suzi,” He said as he walked up to her.

“Hello Henrik,” she gave him a bright smile, “how was your day off?”

“Good, it vas very good! I got to spend some quality time vis my daughter. How vere your students yesterday?”

“They were fine, one of them kept messing around though so I called him out on it.” She chuckled, “After that he didn't make any smartass remarks again.”

He snickered, “You have alvays been good at srowing people’s bullshit back in zeir faces.”

She gave him a friendly shove on his shoulder, “And what is that supposed to mean?”

They both smiled at each other as she walked away to work on a patient. His first patient’s appointment was not scheduled to start for a few minutes so he decided to kill some time in the lounge. As he walked towards the coffee machine though he spotted a man who was leaning against the counter, talking to a few female co-workers. It was Jeff.

He didn't like Jeff. Jeff was an asshole. But everyone has to deal with assholes so he learned to work with him. Most of the time.

“Oh hey Schnipplestin, looks like you're back.”

He gave a sigh, “I vas only gone a day, and for zee last time it is Scheeplestein…Jiff.”

“Well, as I was just telling these lovely ladies here, I happened to save a child’s life yesterday…”

Schneep looked at the girls, they did not look like they were interested in what he was saying, as anyone with any sense would of course. He turned back to Jeff, and gave him a very deadpan look, “It’s our job to save people, Jeff.” With that he walked away, scratching at his neck.

He walked into the room, and smiled at a girl sitting on the edge of a hospital bed, swinging her legs.

“Hello zere Abigail, how are you today?”

She spoke in a soft voice, “I’m good.”

“And how is your dad doing?”

“Come on man, you saw me only yesterday…” Nearby, sitting in a chair, was Chase.

Schneep chuckled, “I know, I know.”

Chase’s daughter had her tonsils taken out a little over a week ago, and thus needed a check up.

“Let us see how your sroat is doing, alright?”

Abigail nodded, continuing to swing her legs.

He grabbed one of the medical flashlights from the wall, “Open vide please.” He shined the flashlight down her throat, looking for any signs of bleeding or further infection.

“So, how is Marshall doing?” He asked Chase.

“Oh he's doing great, he's at the park with Stacy right now.”

“Zat is great, has Abigail been eating soft foods like I instructed? No acidic-drinks?”

“Yes, Stacy told me that she has been.”

“Zat is excellent. And it appears zat everysing is normal.” As he stepped over to the computer, he suddenly felt very tired.

He stumbled, catching himself on the table. He felt dizzy…

Chase quickly got up from the chair and rushed over to Schneep, “Are you ok?!”

Schneep sat down in the chair, and put his head between his legs. “Yes…yeah I sink so. I must have had my knees locked.”

“Are you sure you're ok?” Chase sat back down in his chair, his voice laced with concern.

Schneep gave small laugh, “I am a doctah Chase…of course I know if I am alright or not.”

He carefully sat back up, rubbing at his eyes before turning to the computer to record Abigail’s results.

He walked down the hall towards the surgery room, talking to the patient as he went. “Now, zere is no need to be vorried, ganglion cyst surgery is not life sreatening. Is zere any music zat you vould like to listen to vhen vee give you zee anesthetic?”

The boy, who was roughly 19 to 20 years old, nodded his head, “Yeah…I umm…I enjoy piano music.”

Schneep smiled, “As do I.”

As they entered the room Schneep nodded to Suzi and merely glanced at Jeff.

They instructed the patient to breathe as the music was put on and his anesthetic was administered.

Once the patient was asleep they got to work. Henrik picked up the scalpel as he made the incision that was marked on the patient’s ankle around the cyst.

Whenever he worked he always managed to get into a groove of some sort. He was always careful and methodical. Sometimes he might even tune out everyone else.

He was starting to pull out the cyst and get to the “root” of it when he heard Suzi’s voice. It sounded…alarmed.

He shook his head as he came back to reality, “Vhat vas zat?”

“Henrik, your nose!”

He was confused until a metallic taste met his tongue, “Oh my god!” He quickly backed up from the patient.

“You have to go, now, don't worry I can take it from here!”

“Sank you Suzi!” He replied as he took off his gloves and mask and left the room to take care of his bleeding nose.

He felt dizzy again as he leaned against the sink in the bathroom. How on earth did he get a nosebleed? The humidity was constantly monitored all over the hospital. God, what if it affected the patient? This was their first surgery and the poor guy had been nervous. Henrik wasn't a psychologist but he didn't want to think of the consequences that any complications with the surgery would have on the patient’s psyche. He looked in the mirror as he took the tissue out of his nose. Well, the good news was the bleeding had finally stopped.

When he walked out of the bathroom he saw Suzi and Jeff down the hall.

“Are you ok?” Suzi inquired, turning towards him.

“Yes, but more importantly is zee patient ok?”

“Yes, yes he's alright. We got the cyst out and he’s being taken back to his room.

He gave a sigh of relief, he would never forgive himself if he had caused a patient harm.

“We should have someone take a look at zee monitor for humidity. Vee do not need anymore incidents like zis.”

“I know, I notified someone and they are getting on that.”

There was a scoff from Jeff, “Maybe you should be more careful.”

Schneep slowly turned to him and frowned, “And maybe you should go and jump off a roof…”

They both stared at him in shock, he had never said anything like that before.

Or had he?

He couldn’t remember, but all he could think of was being at Jack’s place. He was recording a video, pretending to operate on his accountant and…

He couldn't remember.

He couldn't remember.

He couldn't remember.

He shut his eyes, and pressed his fingers to his temples, “I…I need a cup of coffee.”

He walked down the hall to the lounge, he didn't have another patient for a few minutes anyway.

When he stumbled through the doorway to the house he was exhausted. This was normal when he got off of work but something felt off. He still didn't like the way he had told Jeff to go and die. He didn't like him but still…

Robbie stumbled up to him, “Robbie is greeting Schneep…”

Henrik gave him a tired smile, “Hello Robbie…”

The zombie wrapped his arms around him, squeezing him into a hug. Schneep returned the hug, patting him on the back. He didn't realize how much he needed this. “Sank you…”

“It is no problem for Robbie.” The zombie smiled, his milky white eyes practically glowing like the moon. The two of them let go of each other and Robbie trundled off towards the kitchen to probably grab a snack. Henrik decided that he would relax so he sat on the couch and decided to watch something on Netflix.

Eventually, Robbie left the kitchen with some ham and lumbered off to his room leaving Schneep alone. He loved the little family that he had but he did enjoy some time to himself every so often. It was quiet, and allowed him to clear his mind.

He flicked through various shows and movies deciding on what to watch. As he clicked the remote to the right the screen got stuck. Confused, he continued to press the right button. The image on the screen rocketed to the right, as it glitched. Suddenly, the lights flickered for a few minutes.

A unanimous call was heard throughout the house, “Marvin!!”

It was replied with another distant yell, “It wasn't me!!”

Schneep looked left and then right hoping no one would see him on the tv. That was enough television for the night. He shut off the television deciding that he should probably head to sleep. He felt he needed a better night's rest anyway.

And there we have it folks, chapter 2! I apologize for this taking so long to get out there, but here it is now!! ^^

Chapter 1

Totally Legit Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Tangerines

Season 1     Season 2      Season 3     Season 4

Season 5 

When he saw her foraging in the Florida forest he thought there should be tangerines for her to somewhat rectify their accommodations and surroundings. Here was a person who had just survived the dark clutches of a monster and he had just led her to another. She maintained that she thoroughly exercised the right to make her own choices so she didn't blame him for her cancer. Nonetheless, Mulder couldn't see past his guilt. She deserved better, and definitely a viable source of Vitamin C instead of mystery berries. If he considered starting an intimate relationship with Scully, and yes he had contemplated this many times, he knew that she deserved better than dingy motel rooms, cheap wine, and him.

He bought her some of her favorite fruit when they got back to DC to make up for the Mothmen and missing the conference. He thought it would be a pleasant surprise for her and could place them on his desk for her to see when she arrived. As he stepped out of the elevator, his nose quickly caught on to the familiar scent of her perfume and saw the lights were already on in the office.

Scully looked up from her morning cup of coffee where she sat in the chair in front of his desk. The warmth of her red hair and healthy glow of her skin made her pink lips stand out. Her cheeks were slightly rouged and she was dressed in a white button-down blouse, a black pencil skirt, and three-inch heels, the ones that accented her calves. She took his breath away and he gripped the paper bag of tangerines in his right hand but willed himself to stop before he offered her a bag full of juice and pulp.

“Good morning, Mulder. How’s your arm feeling?”

He had walked away from their encounter with an invisible assailant with scratches on his face and an injured left arm. Scully applied an antibiotic ointment to his face and insisted his arm had to be in a sling for a few days. It wasn’t Mulder’s style to comply with medical advice when he needed more sleep or to take it easy however after their encounter in the woods and his lingering guilt from her recent brush with death, he acquiesced for the day to wear the uncomfortable strap.

“Hey, Scully,” he greeted with more enthusiasm than he was accustomed to using, especially at such an early hour and in the Hoover building. He wondered if his behavior was that transparent. “This - uh - this is a pleasant surprise.”

Her eyebrow arched slightly at his greeting.

“What are you implying, Mulder?” she asked as she uncrossed her legs. “That I’m always late?”

“No, not at all. I meant that I’m usually the one here first and I don’t get to walk into such a sight of you, Scully,” he rambled. “I mean it’s so great to see you instead of just a dark, empty office.”

“I’m sure you’d be more pleasantly surprised if Bigfoot were sitting here waiting for you,” she quipped with a smile playing on her lips.

He thought of letting her know that she looked really nice. Perhaps, he could even joke about china patterns at her mentioning forest monsters since she knew him so well but he decided not to because there was too much sincerity behind a proposal.

“After our recent case,” he pointed out with a slight shrug of his injured arm. “Maybe I’m not so eager to see Bigfoot.”

The corners of her mouth twitched into a little smile and she tucked an auburn strand behind her ear. “What’s that?”

He was still standing by the doorway with the bag of fruit in his good arm.

“Oh, just a little something to replenish the body from our uh, mishap in the forest,” he explained as he walked over to his desk and sat down. He set the bag in front of her and made a flourish with his free hand. “Help yourself.”

She peered inside and smiled.

“So you know what I’m thinking too,” she said in a low tone.

“Yeah, we didn’t need that conference, Scully,” he managed to say. He was starting to feel a little warm. “It’s unspoken. Our communication isn’t something that needs work.”

She smiled again but there was a hint of something else in her eyes. Her unwavering commitment to him took his breath away. It wasn't anything new as he had always found Scully attractive but having her here, healthy and whole, when he was so close to losing her forever adjusted his field of vision as well as his admitting how he truly felt about her.

With her right hand, she tested the fruit’s firmness and gave it a little squeeze. A glistening caught his attention and his eyes traveled to the top of her shirt where about her neck sat the gold cross necklace. He still questioned whether he owed it to that piece of metal for her being at his side or the one implanted back behind her neck.

“Well, I decided to arrive a little early to get started on all the paperwork regarding our impromptu case. Skinner, of course, can't be too pleased but at least we managed to find the victims we were originally searching for. He can't be upset about that.” She glanced at his arm and continued, “Also, I thought you might need some extra help.”

All he could do was stare as she began to diligently release the tangerine from its skin. Her hands were in line with her breasts and he found himself distracted by the sight of the soft shadows there.

“Mulder?” she prompted.

“Huh?” he answered, slightly startled. “Oh, Scully you didn't have to do that. It's my fault we got into this mess.”

“Okay, who are you and what have you done with Fox Mulder?” she teased.

“No, really, Scully,” he insisted.

He pursed his lips together feeling defeated at not being able to express what, for some time now, felt compelling. Part of him wanted her safe and away from the dangers of their work but he also couldn’t imagine any kind of life without her. He worried that without their quest, Scully wouldn’t have any reason to have anything to do with him while he would always make sure to find one.

“I'm just anxious to finish all this paperwork,” he told her instead. He felt uncertain on whether she would believe that because she knew firsthand he did not like dealing with that task when it came to their job.

“Are you sure you're okay?” she asked with concern.

With the tangerine temporarily forgotten, she walked over to him where he remained seated behind the desk and examined him closely. Her hand reached out and raked through his hair in what he assumed was another search for bumps and cuts. The warmth of her fingertips was a welcoming feeling as it was gentle and comforting against his scalp. She smelled so nice. All her attentions mixed in with his vantage point felt good- a little too good.

“Are you experiencing any kind of symptoms? Headaches, dizziness, nausea, dry mouth, lack of coordination…You were in danger of hypothermic shock, Mulder. Does your arm hurt?”

She fiddled gently with the sling and adjusted it slightly making it feel more comfortable. Compared to many doctors he had been treated by over the years, and there were a fair few, her bedside manner was impeccable and he enjoyed when she went into doctor mode.

To Mulder, there was just something so attractive about a woman who could do it all and Scully more than fulfilled that standard. His health had checked out just fine after their Florida ordeal but at the moment he wouldn’t mind becoming ill. If that ensured that she would keep touching him the way she was, he wanted nothing more than to have some kind of abrasion or even go into hypothermic shock. Thoughts of Scully and a sleeping bag drifted into his mind and then things started getting complicated.

“I feel fine, Scully,” he lamented. He realized that with the slight swelling in his pants, he wouldn't be able to stand up without embarrassing himself. “So we should get started.”

He leaned forward and made a show of shifting around files and paper around his desk. Satisfied by his answer, she walked over to the other side of the room.

“Actually, it's all taken care of. I filled out the expense report for the hotel and I have the case summary,” she summarized proudly. “Do you want to head on over? Skinner is expecting us at eight.”

She gathered the files and tangerine. He had to find an excuse because there was no way he was going to get up from behind his desk and walk up to his boss’ office in his current state.

“Uh, why don't you go ahead and I'll meet you up there. I have to use the little boy’s room.”

The look on her face was one mixed with concern and curiosity. Her lips parted as if to speak but then she pressed them together and nodded. With her head held high, she walked out with an effortless saunter. The clicking of her heels added a needed melody to the lonely and isolated basement hallway.

Once in the bathroom, Mulder rested his palm against the wall and conjured up images that could make his current predicament go away.

This wasn't the first time she had elicited this kind of reaction in him. Spending so much time with a person who makes you feel whole and possesses qualities like Scully would have that effect. These were errant thoughts to have towards his work partner and in their office of all places. His conscience intercepted ‘But they are thoughts to have for someone you love.’ During and after her cancer, he couldn’t deny that he harbored feelings towards her that had a penchant for romance and intimacy, and the opposite of platonic.

In the loneliness and dim light of his apartment, he allowed his fantasies to roam freely. There were musings of what a serious relationship with Scully would be like. She had an incredible ability to ground him and make him feel at ease with himself, with who he was, and no one, including his own parents, had ever made him feel that way. Would it be possible to have her and work alongside her?

After that, his contemplations had the tendency of becoming more primal. The kind that a man had for a woman he wanted to make his. He yearned to peel off her little shirt and skirt and taste the inside of her mouth. He imagined the sweetness of the tangerine on her tongue. What would her breasts feel like in his hands? Soft and yet firm. He wanted to feel her naked flesh against his and devour every inch of her. However, here in the fluorescent spotlight of FBI headquarters with so many prying eyes and wagging tongues, he couldn’t afford such distractions. They were already the center of so many rumors and misconceptions. Although, he wasn't entirely perturbed by the gossip as it only further helped to stake his claim.

“Flukeman, flukeman, flukeman,” he muttered and he felt his body calm down.

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Written for Tsukkikage Week! Days 3 and 5 Prompts: Fireworks and Plans (This honestly got way too long so hope you all don’t mind me combining prompts)

Rating: T

Words: 3.9k

"So then Hinata said we should play volleyball again but I told him I'd already played with you and he got so mad but he's so short so it was funny-"

"You sure become talkative when you're drunk don't you," Tsukishima smiled, turning off his camera and going up to Kageyama.

"I'm not-" Kageyama stuttered in the middle of his sentence when Tsukishima stepped closer. "You're... close."

"I'm aware," he murmured, reaching out to caress Kageyama's soft cheek.

This was one of the few limitations that came with photography, Tsukishima thought as he watched a wobbly smile cross Kageyama's face as he leaned against his hand.

There was no way you could actually reach through the photo and feel Kageyama's skin, warm in the quickly cooling night air. There was no way you would know how it felt when he turned his face to press soft lips against Tsukishima's fingers.

And there was definitely no way you could pull him closer, and hear him gasp in surprise before kissing the hell out of him.

"Please, Tsukishima-san!"

"Sorry, I can't do that," Tsukishima mumbled, trying to make it clear that he was very uninterested in the girl standing in front of him.

"Why not?!" said girl asked, pouting and looking up at him through her obviously fake eyelashes in a way that Tsukishima guessed was meant to be cute.

It just seemed utterly pathetic to him.

"Look, just because you're a model doesn't mean I'll immediately agree to do a shoot for you," Tsukishima sighed. He'd been doing that an awful lot this evening.

"But! But you agreed to do it for... for him," she frowned, looking off to a table near the edge of the banquet hall where a certain dark haired male was hovering over a row of expensive drinks. Hopefully he didn't drink too much... Tsukishima still had bad memories from last year's awards ceremony.

The blond turned his gaze back to the girl when she continued with a flip of her hair, "Like, he's probably not as famous as me," Tsukishima had to hide a smirk when she said that because he actually had no idea who she was, "and even if he is, he just looks... kind of boring and unattractive."

Tsukishima stood there in mild shock for a moment. Had she really just said that about his...

He blinked, having to remind himself that people often behaved idiotically when they were jealous. Well, actually people were stupid in general, but this one was proving to be a special case.

Tsukishima gave the girl a fake smile (still less fake than her eyelashes though).

"I'm fairly sure Kageyama is as famous as you are, considering the fact that he was one of the lead actors in BNHA," he stated, lips curving up when the girl's eyes widened in surprise.

"He's also been nominated for eleven awards tomorrow, and runs a very successful business aside from his acting career. Oh, and did I mention he's only 23?" Tsukishima was almost having fun at this point. Almost.

It felt great watching the girl's expression go from confident to sour, and it was a shame that Tsukishima decided to be a decent person and not take it too far.

Time to play his final card.

"You called him boring and unattractive right? Well.. you might need to get your eyes checked because I only take pictures of beautiful people."

And with that, Tsukishima walked away, not sparing her a second glance as he made his way through the crowd of celebrities towards the table he'd seen Kageyama at earlier.

He looked around when he got there, not finding him anywhere nearby. Now if he was a drunk Kageyama, where would he be...

Well, that would depend on how drunk he was, Tsukishima thought to himself with a chuckle as he left the table and wandered around, always keeping an eye out for a dark head of hair.

A level one drunk Kageyama was even more intimidating than he usually seemed. Though he'd told Tsukishima that he only looked like that because he'd rather have milk than vodka, but his costars would force him to take a shot to "lighten up."

Level two drunk Kageyama actually did "lighten up" a bit, as his glare would become more unfocused and he'd start smiling(?) more.

And level three was where he started to become... extremely clingy, Tsukishima smiled to himself as he thought back. Kageyama had pretty much sat himself in his lap and refused to let go the whole night. It would have been really endearing if the paparazzi hadn't been around to gawk at them the whole time.

But they weren't here today so who knew if level four drunk Kageyama would make an appearance...

Tsukishima finally wandered out on the balcony, where a few couples were quietly chatting away, silhouettes outlined faintly from the city lights outside. It was significantly less crowded out here, so it only took a minute before Tsukishima spotted a lone figure standing at the edge of the balcony.

As he made his way over, it hit him that Kageyama had been by himself for most of the night, and he couldn't help but feel a little bad for him. Popular as he was, Kageyama was more of a solitary king, admired by many, yet close to none.

At least that had been the case until Tsukishima had forced him to open up during their first photo shoot. Now he was close to one... or well two if you counted his annoying shrimp of a roommate but that was beside the point.

"Hey," he said, lightly patting Kageyama's back to announce his presence.

Kageyama turned to look at him and his face practically lit up when he noticed Tsukishima. His tie was crooked and his shirt was half undone under his blazer and... okay, he looked really good like that.

"Tsu- Tsukishima.. Where were you..." Kageyama whined and wrapped himself around the taller blond, nuzzling his neck.

This was definitely a level three drunk Kageyama and Tsukishima was so very grateful.

"I had to deal with a few bothersome people," he shrugged, absently stroking Kageyama's silky hair. "But I'm glad I got to you before you ended up drunk on your ass like last year."

Kageyama made a confused sound so Tsukishima sighed before elaborating, "You started shamelessly grinding on me while blabbing about all the things you wanted me to do to you later."

That had Kageyama blushing, his face turning even redder than it already had been from the alcohol. "Well... good thing you stopped me this time, right?" he muttered quietly.

"Yeah,but barely," Tsukishima said, pulling Kageyama off of him so he could adjust his tie. "A famous actor like you can't go ruining his image by looking unprofessional, so try and sober up."

Once he was satisfied with the tie, Tsukishima buttoned up the top half of Kageyama's shirt as he complained, "But I liked it like that..."

"Save the sexy look for tomorrow night when I can have you to myself," Tsukishima murmured in his ear, and that immediately put an end to Kageyama's whining.  

A cool breeze blew across the balcony, ruffling Kageyama's hair as they looked out at the city lights in the darkening sky. Or well, Kageyama was looking; Tsukishima was too busy appreciating a much better view.

It infuriated him to no end that people would claim Kageyama looked boring. If only they bothered to look a little closer, then they'd see how his dark blue eyes would sparkle when he talked about acting or volleyball, how his soft lips would curve into a small smile when he was really happy...

Or how absolutely stunning he was when his cheeks were flushed a light pink color and his hair was swaying in the wind like it was right now.

Beautiful, was the only word Tsukishima's mind provided him with.

Suddenly a loud noise shook him out of his thoughts and pulled his attention to the explosion of color in the sky. Streaks of blue, green, and every other color imaginable lit up the balcony and reflected off of Kageyama's eyes as he gazed up at the fireworks, amazed in his inebriated state.

And the whole scene was just too irresistible for Tsukishima to not try and capture in a picture.

He quickly grabbed his camera that was almost always slung around his neck, adjusting the exposure settings before pointing it at Kageyama to take a test shot.

"Hey, I wasn't ready," Kageyama said when he heard the click, trying to fix his posture and only succeeding at looking extremely awkward.

"I keep telling you, you don't need to be ready," Tsukishima retorted, looking at the picture shaking his head.

The exposure was still too dark, and he hadn't held his camera steady so it was a bit blurry and yet... the way Kageyama was leaning casually against the railing, staring off into the distance still managed to make the picture look amazing.

And not to mention, the picture quality was shit, considering Tsukishima's very high standards he always held himself to.

So he had no idea how people could be so stupidly, blissfully ignorant of the hot mess currently standing in front of him.

"Tsukishima.." Kageyama started, and Tsukishima looked up from the picture to see him smiling up at the sky. "Did you know I used to be scared of fireworks?"

"No... Why would anyone be afraid of fireworks?" He replied, only half concentrating on the conversation so he could adjust the settings on his camera.

"I was a little kid!" Kageyama pouted adorably for a moment before continuing, "But it was cause I used to think those things would fall down and set everything on fire."

"Oh that's... actually kind of cute," Tsukishima replied with a small smile, snapping two pictures in succession.

"No one thought it was cute back then," Kageyama grumbled, and Tsukishima let him ramble, changing positions every so often to capture Kageyama's perfection from different angles as the background colors kept changing with each wave of fireworks.

Taking pictures of Kageyama was honestly something he didn't think he'd ever tire of. There was just so much to him... so much he desperately wanted to portray in a picture.

There had been multiple occasions when his camera had run out of battery with only photos of Kageyama on the SD card.

Okay, maybe he was a bit obsessed, but it wasn't as if he posted these anywhere so no one else would find out.

And his stupid boyfriend would never believe that all the pictures meant anything other than him being used as a subject for Tsukishima to practice on, so it was fine, really.

Kageyama was talking about their cat now, laughing about how she'd woken them up this morning yowling because she'd gotten herself tangled up in one of Tsukishima's scarves.

Tsukishima used that chance to capture a rare Kageyama in mid laugh, the fireworks behind him making it look like he was glowing a very soft blue.

That one.

That was the one, Tsukishima knew it.

Every so often, he'd take a picture that would come out absolutely, unbelievably perfect.

And it would always, always happen at the spur of the moment. Tsukishima could plan for ages and try to coax Kageyama into smiling properly for a shot, but nothing could compare to this one picture.

It was raw, unedited, natural beauty.

Tsukishima took a slow, deep breath, and then double checked to make sure that photo was saved before looking away from his screen and up to the real Kageyama.

"So then Hinata said we should play volleyball again but I told him I'd already played with you and he got so mad but he's so short so it was funny-"

"You sure become talkative when you're drunk don't you," Tsukishima smiled, turning off his camera and going up to Kageyama.

"I'm not-" Kageyama stuttered in the middle of his sentence when Tsukishima stepped closer. "You're... close."

"I'm aware," he murmured, reaching out to caress Kageyama's soft cheek.

This was one of the few limitations that came with photography, Tsukishima thought as he watched a wobbly smile cross Kageyama's face as he leaned against his hand.

There was no way you could actually reach through the photo and feel Kageyama's skin, warm in the quickly cooling night air. There was no way you would know how it felt when he turned his face to press soft lips against Tsukishima's fingers.

And there was definitely no way you could pull him closer, and hear him gasp in surprise before kissing the hell out of him.

Not that Tsukishima would let anyone else experience those things anyway; Kageyama was his and his alone.

That possessive thought had him biting on Kageyama's bottom lip a little, getting a low moan from him in return.

Tsukishima wasn't normally a fan of PDA (Kageyama was just a bit oblivious to the awkwardness that came with it). But since it was dark and there weren't that many people around, he let the kiss continue.

This was easily one of the best things the world had to offer, Tsukishima thought as he tilted his head and encouraged the actor to open his mouth and deepen the kiss.

Making out with Kageyama just felt so... right.

It felt as good as the weight of a camera in Tsukishima's steady hands, or the satisfying sound of the shutter going off when he took a picture he knew would turn out amazing.

They parted for a mere second, only to draw in a breath of much needed air before diving back in, Kageyama pressing his whole body against him now.

Fuck, Tsukishima could honestly kiss him forever-

"Oh so that's why you think he's so beautiful."

A familiar voice spoke up near them and Tsukishima groaned, pulling away from Kageyama and discreetly wiping his mouth before frowning at the source of the unwanted third party.

It was the girl from earlier, back and even more annoying this time.

"Some professional photographer you are, if you'll only take photos of your boyfriend," she sneered.

Tsukishima sighed, about to reply but Kageyama beat him to it.

"Tsukishima doesn't take pictures for people he doesn't like," he said defensively, still wobbling a little but sounding much more sober than before.

"And he especially won't do it for rude and stuck up people... are these fake?" Kageyama sounded amazed as he reached out to try and touch her eyelashes and Tsukishima bit back a laugh as he pulled his hand away.

"What are you- what's wrong with you?!" She said, sounding disgusted and weirded out as she stepped back to put more space between them.

"He's drunk," Tsukishima shrugged, but didn't say anything else. Normally he'd apologize but... Kageyama hadn't been wrong.

"Still, a so called famous actor like him can't go around insulting people like that! If his fans found out..."

"Did you forget you started this whole thing by coming here and insulting me?" Tsukishima was honestly getting really fed up with her.

But now that she was threatening Kageyama's public image and reputation, he knew the smartest move would be to back down.

So instead of continuing to argue, he first shushed Kageyama who'd started to say something. Then he took out his phone and pulled up a website.

"Here, this is my roommate. His photography style is similar to mine and I'm sure he'd be willing to do a shoot for you sometime," Tsukishima said, hoping she'd just accept it and leave.

Surprisingly, the second she got the offer, she smiled brightly, almost bouncing on her feet.

"Ooh! Okay I'll contact him right now!" She said, literally dialing the numbers right in front of him. Tsukishima wondered if she'd suddenly become possessed by an entirely different person.

But at least she was off of his tail now and he could get some peace.

"Well, hope it works out," Tsukishima muttered and then started pulling Kageyama away from her and back into the main hall where people had started to dance.

"Did you shove her off to Hinata?" Kageyama asked, leaning heavily against Tsukishima.

"Yeah. I don't even feel bad about it."

Kageyama laughed, a pleasant sound in his ears as he dragged him to a round table and made him sit down.

Tsukishima nudged a glass of water in his hand before taking a seat next to him.

"Drink up, you'll thank me for it tomorrow," he said, watching the actor pout at the water.

"I want milk," he mumbled, and Tsukishima had to promise to buy his favorite milk tomorrow before Kageyama finally downed the glass.

Twenty three years old and he still acted like a child sometimes.

And Tsukishima though it was ridiculous that he found all of Kageyama's little quirks cute.

It was an interesting concept too, how Kageyama himself was somewhat naive and awkward in social situations. Yet when he was given a script, he could nail almost any kind of character.

Take his last movie for example. Everyone had thought he'd get the role of Todoroki Shoto, a somewhat calm character that didn't have many friends at first due to issues from his past.

But then when the final decisions were made, all of Japan had been shocked when Kageyama had gotten the role of the main villain instead, Shigaraki Tomura, who didn't hesitate to kill anyone to achieve his goal.

Tsukishima himself had been a bit skeptical at first, but then any doubt had been washed away when he'd seen Kageyama practice his lines in their bedroom.

He really was something, Tsukishima thought as he watched Kageyama staring intensely at the flowers placed at the center of the table.

"Tobio-chan! What are you doing?!"

Tsukishima looked up to see one of Kageyama's costars rushing up to him and drunkenly trying to pull him out of his chair.

"Hey-!" He quickly stood up as the other guy dragged Kageyama away towards the group of people dancing.

"Tobio-chan's boyfriend can come too! You both need to stop being boring and have some fun!"

Tsukishima rolled his eyes but followed the two of them anyway. He obviously couldn't let Kageyama go anywhere by himself when he was drunk, knowing him he'd probably mistake someone else for Tsukishima and start trying to kiss them.

Yes, it had happened before.

Once he found his way back to Kageyama, the actor looked at him with poorly disguised puppy eyes and Tsukishima frowned at him.

"I'm not dancing."

"Tsukishimaaaa," Kageyama whined, trying to grab his hands as he deftly evaded him. "You don't even have to do a lot!"

"Uh, that definitely looks like a lot," he retorted, pointing at a couple that was doing a complicated routine that seemed more like it was for professional dancers than a simple party dance. Oh wait, they probably were actual dancers.

Kageyama grumbled something under his breath and Tsukishima put his hands on his cheeks, making him meet his eyes.

"Kageyama. You don't dance either. You only want to now because you're drunk as hell," he explained carefully.

"But that's the point..." Kageyama trailed off suddenly, and Tsukishima let go off his face when the music started to change.

This melody was a lot slower, a soft voice joining in with the sound of piano, singing in a language he didn't understand.

Before he could process anything, Kageyama was guiding Tsukishima's arms around his waist.

"You can do this dance for sure," he said, his own hands finding their way to Tsukishima's shoulders.

"What..." Tsukishima tried to pull away but Kageyama only clung to him more and then started swaying their bodies in time to the music.

"See?! It's super easy," Kageyama said, leaning his head forward on Tsukishima's chest.

Okay so maybe this wasn't so bad...

Tsukishima reluctantly started moving along with him, eventually taking the lead as Kageyama just rested his weight against him.

"I'm surprised you know how to do this," he murmured into the actor's ear.

"I'm not that stupid," Kageyama mumbled, and Tsukishima huffed a small laugh. "But it's cause I had to do it for a movie a while back."

"I figured."

They stopped talking for a while after that, just enjoying the other's presence and warmth as they slowly rocked back and forth.

And then Kageyama looked up at him, eyes still somewhat unfocused, but serious.

"Tsukishima... are you coming with me next month?" He asked quietly.

Next month... Kageyama would be leaving to shoot a movie in America. The shooting itself would only take about three months, and they had been apart for longer than that. But this time, Kageyama had other events to go to concerning the company he was working to build, along with plans for a second movie that would also be shot there.

And there was no set date for his return to Japan.

"I... don't know," Tsukishima answered honestly, leaning his head down on Kageyama's shoulder.

Tsukishima could go with him, probably. As a successful photographer, it wasn't as if he didn't have the money.

In fact there were only two problems. The first was that he probably wouldn't make much money there, since his fame was, for the most part, limited to Japan unlike Kageyama who had fans all over the world.

And the second was... he couldn't just follow his boyfriend around forever, could he? Tsukishima hated when the media sometimes just referred to him as Kageyama Tobio's boyfriend instead of the hard working photographer he was.

That last one was mainly a pride thing, but still...

"It's going to suck being away from you for that long," Kageyama sighed into his shirt. "I can never sleep properly without you next to me now."

Tsukishima felt the same, even though he always complained that the actor would take up way too much space and hog the blankets.

Nights without Kageyama were always lonely and left him feeling like he hadn't drank coffee in a week.

Not to mention the fact that phone/Skype sex was literally nothing compared to actually having Kageyama writhing under him in bed.

"Yeah, and I'll definitely miss fucking you," Tsukishima said with a smirk, earning him a small shove from a blushing Kageyama.

"Okay but seriously," he continued, "I'll maybe come visit you sometime so it won't be that bad. You said you were going to New York right?"

Kageyama nodded. "New York, and then from there I think I'm going to LA."

"Well, I've always wanted to take pictures in Central Park," Tsukishima said thoughtfully. He could already imagine the gorgeous pictures he'd be able to get of Kageyama in the snow. "And then LA has that place where famous people live, Beverly Hills I think."

"It has Disneyland too," Kageyama added, and Tsukishima smiled.

"You don't even go on roller coasters," he pointed out.

"Roller coasters aren't the only things there! There are other rides, and stuff to do..."

Tsukishima couldn't help it, he leaned down and kissed Kageyama's cheek as quickly as he could. Seeing him get excited about their plans was just too cute.

At that moment, the music they'd been swaying to morphed into another upbeat song. Tsukishima almost felt disappointed when Kageyama moved away from him, grabbing his hand and heading back to their little table.

"So... you promise you're going to visit me then right?" Kageyama asked once they sat down, blue eyes staring intently into Tsukishima's.

Well, it wasn't as if he could refuse now. Even if he said no, it would probably only take a few months until Tsukishima himself would say fuck it and give in.

"Yeah. Promise," he replied.

Kageyama smiled then, and scooted his chair close enough to Tsukishima's so he could rest his head against him, nuzzling into his side.

"Hey, if you fall asleep I'm not carrying you back to the limo," Tsukishima said, lifting an arm to put it around Kageyama's shoulders.

"Alcohol makes me sleepy... but I know you'll bring me back," the actor mumbled, his eyes drifting shut.

"We'll see about that," Tsukishima scoffed, but even he knew in this case, Kageyama was 100% right.

No matter the distance, no matter the situation, even if they had to wait a year or even more....

He'd always bring Kageyama home.

2.4 - A Sleepless Night

Idolish Seven - Part 3, Chapter 2.4 For more Part 3 translations, click here!

Translation below the cut!

Ogami Banri: President, I found this as I was cleaning the office....... Takanashi Otoharu: Is that Tsukumo company newsletter file folder? That sure brings back memories. Ogami Banri: 'Memories?' Did you use to work for Tsukumo Productions? Takanashi Otoharu: That was before my daughter was born. See, look. There's my wife, and there's Yaotome-kun. Ogami Banri: I knew that President Yaotome used to work at Tsukumo Productions. He even has their support. Takanashi Otoharu: Indeed. There's lots of of agencies like that. Things are much easier to do when you have Tsukumo backing you. Ogami Banri: Are you getting support from them, President? Takanashi Otoharu: I gave them a piece of my mind and left, so no. Selling people until they can't sell anymore, then throwing them away after they're all used up-- that type of company mindset just didn't sit well with me. Takanashi Otoharu: I've given everyone so much trouble by defying Tsukumo, but I'm glad that I've been able to work the way I want to. Ogami Banri: That's true.... It's surprising that you were colleagues with President Yaotome, though. Takanashi Otoharu: Yaotome-kun, Musubi, and I used to talk about our dreams and aspirations. The three of us would talk about the things we wanted to do, or the things we absolutely had to do. Takanashi Otoharu: Yaotome-kun has it rough too..... He can't defy Tsukumo no matter what because he's under their patronage. Ogami Banri: Does that include Yaotome Productions? Takanashi Otoharu: It's because Tsukumo and Hoshikage have very different histories. And by history, I mean the people who've been moving the industry along. Takanashi Otoharu: People in management positions choose Tsukumo in times of need. Their stocks and interests are intermingled in a complex manner, after all. Ogami Banri: ...That makes it sound like the entertainment industry is a place where there's no room for dreams or aspirations, like a big, terrifying wall before you. Takanashi Otoharu: There are dreams and aspirations. After all, the audience is the one with the final say. Takanashi Otoharu: No matter how huge an agency is, no matter how big the star is, they can't do anything if they don't have an audience. Fans, and the people who aren't fans, are the most important. Takanashi Otoharu: Those kids seized the chance. IDOLiSH7's dreams, and the dreams they show-- both of these light up the audience's eyes with excitement. Takanashi Otoharu: It's a type of magic, one that wins against even the strongest power.

*click* Tsukumo Ryou: Hello, Momo. So you've come. I've been waiting for you. Momo: Here. I have a gift for you. They're kashiwa mochi I got for half-off from a shop in front of the station. Tsukumo Ryou: Wow! It's just like Children's Day! Shall we don helmets and play around? (1) Momo: Only if I can arm myself. Pardon the intrusion. Tsukumo Ryou: Come on in, make yourself at home. Momo: Here I thought you'd live in a high-rise apartment, but you're actually pretty close to the ground. Are you scared of high places, Ryou-san? Tsukumo Ryou: Well, if I lived in a high-rise, I wouldn't be able to toss my pet off the balcony. They'd die. Momo: Your jokes are awful....... It'd be dangerous to toss them off even at this height. I love animals, so I'm not even gonna laugh. Tsukumo Ryou: I didn't laugh either. Now, which cut of meat would you like to start out with? Or shall we raise our glasses to a toast first? Momo: Sorry, but I can't stay for long. Why are all three of our groups becoming part of Tsukumo? Momo: Is it because the President said so? Or was it the President's mother? Who is the mastermind behind this? Tsukumo Ryou: It's me. Tsukumo Ryou: I am going to be Tsukumo's new President. I'll be officially inaugurated next month. Go ahead, congratulate me. Momo: ....... No way, you're lying....... Tsukumo Ryou: Now, that's a little difficult to pop open a champagne bottle to. Why do you think so? Momo: Because you were never interested in the entertainment industry, Ryou-san. And even though you're the second son in Tsukumo, you've always been wandering aimlessly without any goal in mind. Tsukumo Ryou: Oh no, not at all. I am positively teeming with interest. Especially in your line of work, Momo. In idols. Momo: Why? Tsukumo Ryou: Momo. I'm giving you a 50, failing marks. Same goes for Yuki, whom you adore so much. Momo: ....... Momo: As if Yuki could get an F. He's handsome, he's a gentleman, his cooking is really good.... Tsukumo Ryou: ...Ah, my bad. Let's blacklist his name for now, since the conversation will only get derailed if we bring him up. Momo: If he were a river, then you can swim, fish, and go rafting there! I bet you could even catch pond skaters, and barbecue-- Tsukumo Ryou: Alright, alright. He's a Class A river. Do you mind if I talk now? (2) Momo: Go ahead. Tsukumo Ryou: I'm handsome, smart, and passionate. I've got a sense for business, and an abundance of hobbies. I am excellent at sports and overflowing with refinement. Tsukumo Ryou: Not only that, I've also mastered the art of conversation and am sociable. I am capable of learning almost anything, with just a little bit of studying. I've got excellent taste, and I can even sing well. Lalala~ Momo: ......Are you gonna keep going? Tsukumo Ryou: And yet, my parents love my brother. Thanks to that, Tsukumo has been on the decline. Momo: ....... Tsukumo Ryou: Idols are the same. All of you are flawed beings. And yet, the masses love you and you bring in money. Tsukumo Ryou: I want to expose that secret. Tsukumo Ryou: In other words, I'm going to stick my hands in and mess it all up-- as if you were kneading a sticky, gooey hamburger. Momo: ....... Seriously...? Tsukumo Ryou: Ahaha. You're terrifying, Momo. You realized it before anyone in my family or office did. Tsukumo Ryou: You noticed my profound brilliance. That I have the power to move people. That's why you're trying to curry favor with me. Momo: ....... Momo: Ryou-san, I'm begging you! Let's go to the Employment Service Center and look for another job! How about being a florist? (3) Tsukumo Ryou: First, I have to strike down Hoshikage and absorb them into Tsukumo. And then I'll absorb your lot. At that point in time, I'll have complete control over mass media. Momo: Working in a crêpe shop wouldn't be too bad either.... Tsukumo Ryou: And as a final touch, I'll hop on to the idol boom and profit with great efficiency, all while indulging in bacchanalian revelry. A delicious hamburger is complete. Bon appétit. Momo: ......You don't have anyone who could take down Hoshikage. Their stars are all secret, too. You don't have anything that could shake their foundation either-- Tsukumo Ryou: Chiba Salon. Tsukumo Ryou: It's the epitome of a scandal. The only way it's been able to stay as an open secret is through Hoshikage's power and through Chiba Shizuo's name. Tsukumo Ryou: If an unknown actor from a tiny agency tried to leak it, they'd be beaten to smithereens and banished from the industry. It's that type of scoop. Anyone who to go against the flow will be attacked from all sides, all in one go. Tsukumo Ryou: Of course, there's someone out there who can reveal the secret, but they've got him in check. It's someone you know very well, a very big name in the industry. It won't stop as just a tiny little leak in the weekly magazines. Momo: ......Who's gonna reveal it? Tsukumo Ryou: It's a secret. Tsukumo Ryou: If all goes well, then IDOLiSH7 might have to change their name. After all, they'll be left with six members. Tsukumo Ryou: I.... I-something-six. What a wonderful name, don't you agree? Momo. Momo: ....... Momo: Let me tell you why nobody loves you-- you're a psychopath. You have absolutely no conscience or love in you, not even one bit. Tsukumo Ryou: How delightful. Many of the top entrepreneurs out there are psychopaths. Thanks for guaranteeing my success. Momo: ......I'm going home! Tsukumo Ryou: Sit down, Momo. Or else I'll toss you off the balcony. Momo: I'm gonna go home before I bash your face in, that's what I'm saying! Tsukumo Ryou: You are my friend. I don't mind sparing Re:vale, and only Re:vale. But only if you'll strike a deal with me. Momo: ....... Tsukumo Ryou: Yuki can't live in such a tiny, confined world. But in my hands, I'll liquidate every last drop of him into money. Tsukumo Ryou: It's just as you said, Momo. He's a real hottie! You can use every bit of him, down to the bone-- just like high-quality livestock. You can make bags, shoes, soup, and even manure out of him. Tsukumo Ryou: So, what will you do? Momo: ....... Momo: ...You mentioned a deal? Tsukumo Ryou: That big-name will reveal the naked truth of Chiba Salon's existence. Tsukumo Ryou: That in itself is enough, but I want it to be a little more festive. Tsukumo Ryou: I want you to give me the raw voice recording of this confession from Chiba Shizuo's bastard child-- Nikaidou Yamato. (4)

*click* Izumi Iori: ...You're still awake, Nikaidou-san? Nikaidou Yamato: Yeah, I was reading. Kids shouldn't be staying up too late, Ichi. Izumi Iori: Who are you calling a child? Nikaidou Yamato: Ahaha. Nikaidou Yamato: ......Say, Producer Izumi. Izumi Iori: ....... Please don't call me that. What if someone overhears? Nikaidou Yamato: We're the only ones here. There's something I'd like to ask you, since you're such a capable producer. Izumi Iori: What is it? Nikaidou Yamato: The idol group, IDOLiSH7. If there was a scoop that would muddy up their image, to the point where nobody would even want to touch them.... Nikaidou Yamato: If I told you that this Onii-san here had something like that, what would you do? Would you sever ties with me right this instant? Izumi Iori: ....... Izumi Iori: It depends on you, Nikaidou-san. Nikaidou Yamato: Haha.... No promises about how you wouldn't sever ties, huh. That's very like you. Izumi Iori: Of course. There's no meaning in losing you too if IDOLiSH7's image goes down. Izumi Iori: Are you prepared to cling onto IDOLiSH7 regardless of what situation befalls us, Nikaidou-san? Do you have that resolve? Izumi Iori: If you aren't, then tell me now. Then I can cut you from the group right this instant, even if the other members curse at me. Nikaidou Yamato: ....... Izumi Iori: If you can fixate yourself on IDOLiSH7, then no matter what happens, we can make the first move and fight. However....... Izumi Iori: Nanase-san had been removed from center once, and Nii-san had lost his confidence for a period of time. Neither of them had ever once joked about quitting the group. Izumi Iori: Ask me again when you can say it with a straight face. Nikaidou Yamato: ......Nothing but sound reasoning, all painfully true. You sure aren't a cute kid. Izumi Iori: You're the one who called me producer. Good night. Don't stay up too late. *slam* Nikaidou Yamato: ....... Nikaidou Yamato: Prepared to cling on, huh....... I've never had to make that decision, not even once in my life. Nikaidou Yamato: I should've never thought about something as stupid as revenge. Nikaidou Yamato: ......I've been regretting that ever since the day I auditioned and got into IDOLiSH7.

To be continued....

TL Notes/comments:

Thank you @kuriiii for proofreading as usual!!!

(1) kashiwamochi = mochi wrapped with oak leaves typically served on Children's Day. Helmets (specifically traditional Japanese military helmets) are "symbols of strength and vitality," and also a thing pertaining to Children's Day. Read more about it here! (2) Class A river is this thing. tl;dr a particularly important river protected by the government (3) (this is str8 frm wiki) "Hello Work is the Japanese English name for the Japanese government's Employment Service Center, which manages unemployment insurance benefits for both Japanese and foreign unemployed workers, and which also provides job-matching programs to the unemployed."  (4) technically 'chiba shizuo's mistress's child' but? u know what that means? Bastard Child. which also nice dramatic ring to it. Last note, ハンバーグ is more of a thick slab of hamburger meat presented kinda like a steak but hamburger steak, steak, Salisbury steak, none of them particularly appealed to me in subbing in alternatives so I just left it as pseudo-direct ‘hamburger’ idk if you can tell but i hvae a lot of fun translating ryou HAHA

As usual, if you see any mistakes/mistranslations/etc, please message me!

Thank you for reading!!

15 Things Facebook Ads Should Do Better

Lets hop right into it. Facebook can be a powerful advertising tool but there are several things that annoy me about the platform or I think could be done better. So here are 15 of those things that I think Facebook should fix in order to make the platform better for advertisers.

1) User Interface Speed.

This complaint is pretty simple. Ads manager as a platform can be incredibly slow. At its best, lets just say the speed is…serviceable. Not once have I been impressed by the platforms speed. Publishing ads can take quite a long time, and heck, even switching between tabs and column metrics can get laggy. An upgrade on Facebook’s part to UI speed would be a great quality of life improvement.

2) Audience performance breakdowns from ad sets detailed targeting.

Facebook has a ton of detailed targeting options to choose from to help you target the correct audience. Here’s my issue though, why can’t I get a breakdown of performance between those interests/behaviors/demographics if they are layered into the same ad set? Sure, you can tell me to just separate those audiences into their own ad sets and that way I can know how each of them performs. Tell me that and I’ll tell you you’ve probably never had to manage a large account. Sometimes you HAVE TO layer audiences together to get a decent audience size especially if you target specific geo locations independently.

Say you have 50 geo locations that you need to target independently and you have 5 interest categories you’ve layered together to get a decent audience size on each geo. Well by breaking them out into their own ad sets we have just created an extra 250 ad sets along with all the ads that go along with it. Oh and you have to implement lookalike ad sets, behavioral ad sets, and remarketing ad sets into your account too. Suddenly your account has gotten to be a bit large and hard to keep track of things. Remember my complaint about UI speed, well enjoy taking time uploading ads for 250 ad sets.

3) Bring back audience size estimator for custom audiences.

While we are on the topic of ad sets, a great feature included here is the potential reach estimator that changes as you layer targeting into the ad set. Super useful! Until you add any kind of custom audience to that ad set. Then the size estimator becomes “unavailable”. If your strategy has you excluding past purchasers from your ad set, you can’t see the audience size estimator anymore. Did Facebook do this due to privacy issues? Well heres the thing, I can see my audiences sizes like past purchasers outside of an ad set either in the audiences section of Ads Manager or in CRM data. So I can still find out how big the audience size is at the ad set level…just in a super roundabout and time consuming way. Please Facebook, bring back size estimator in full.

4) Search by asset/image name at ad creation stage.

Why oh why can’t I search for an image by name at the ad creation stage? I can in the asset library but not at ad creation stage? Why? Look at this screenshot…there is no place to search for an image by name. Its incredibly frustrating to endlessly scroll through this mess every time I am trying to find a specific image. We name files so we can find them easily, but that doesn’t really matter when creating an ad…because you can’t search for it. A search bar here should definitely be a thing.

5) Facebook reaction faces on ads.

Please excuse my attempts to black out text on this ad, it was done so to protect who the advertiser is and ad copy strategy. Just pay attention to the reaction faces near the bottom. 196 people have either liked, loved, or “angry faced” this ad. Look closer though, only 3 people have clicked the angry face. So why is it so prominently displayed right next to the number 196? Out of 196 people, only three clicked the angry face. In my opinion, having that angry face hurts the ad’s appearance. I’m not saying the angry face should never be displayed…but there has got to be some threshold for this stuff. If 50 people had clicked the angry face, yes I could understand it being displayed like this. But only three did.

6) Ad set budget grouping for budget optimization.

Lets take a break from me talking about things that really annoy me to one that isn’t so much an annoyance but a feature I’d like to see done more in depth. Campaign budget optimization is a pretty cool tool for managing budgets and helping you get the most results possible. I would love to be able to do this on an ad set level of some sort. Say I have 9 ad sets in a campaign that target 3 different geo locations (3 ad sets per location each using different targeting). I would love to house all these geos under one campaign and group ad sets together based on location to have their own budget optimization. This would eliminate the need to break this campaign out into 3 separate campaigns to effectively budget for each geo and use budget optimization.

7) Campaign budget optimization from lifetime to daily.

I would love to be able to switch a campaigns budget optimization from lifetime budget to daily budget after a campaign has been published. I am not sure why you can’t but it seems like something that should be a thing.

8) Performance by country breakdown data.

I think its great we can breakdown our campaigns/ad sets/ads by how they have performed by country. Its also great we can export this data into excel. But I absolutely hate the fact that when you download this data, Facebook spits out the countries by 2 letter country code and not the entire country name. If you ever go into an account that is targeting the entire world in one campaign and want to know how each country is performing (download the data, format it, make some pretty graphs, etc) be ready to look up each country’s 2 letter code. I don’t know about you but I sure haven’t memorized all of them.

9) Filter by ad type.

Facebook allows you to create some pretty cool ad types like single image, carousel, video, slideshow, etc. But if you ever want to find a specific ad type in your account quickly you better name your ads appropriately with the ad type it is. Because you can’t filter by ad type for some reason. This could be a pretty useful filtering option.

10) Filtering with OR statements.

Here is an example of what I mean. Lets say I want to quickly filter for campaigns in my account that have a campaign name containing “apples” or “oranges”. If you set a campaign name filter to campaigns that contain “apples” you’ll get intended results. As soon as you try to layer on another campaign name filter with contains “oranges” you suddenly won’t find any results….unless you have a campaign name that contains both, but for the sake of the argument assume you’ve broken you apples and oranges campaigns into separate campaigns. What I’m getting at is I should be able to layer naming filters, or any other filters, with an OR statement.

11) Asset customization for all placements.

I am of the mind set that you should opt in to all of the placements on Facebook ads that make sense, and then let the algorithm decide which placement is best to show your ads on. I have found the best performance using this method. However I would also like to utilize asset customization for each placement so my ads look as good as possible where they show. Yet not all placements are available for asset customization. I hope Facebook gets around to fixing this, as it is a feature I would like to use more of.

12) Ads Manager UI kicks you to weird locations after certain actions.

Have you ever clicked into one campaign, then clicked into one ad set, and wanted to create an ad for that specific place? Ever noticed how as soon as you create that ad and its added as a draft the UI kicks you out of the campaign and ad set you were trying to create that ad in? Happens every…single…time. Why is this a thing? Confuses the heck out of me sometimes when I am trying to keep track of where I am putting ads.

13) Edit product catalog sets after creation

The Facebook catalog is a great tool for uploading your inventory and using dynamic ads to sell products. Its also useful that you can create product sets based on certain inventory features. What I don’t understand is why I can’t edit a product set after its been created. I have to duplicate the set and then make changes. So now I have two product sets when all I really needed was to make a minor change to one. Keep this process up over time and you’ll have a lot of product sets unless you delete them. Which yeah, that is totally an option but it also seems pretty reasonable to let us edit an existing product set. Especially since after making the changes you need to, you then have to go back into ads manager and make necessary changes to ad sets/ads.

14) Ability to enable ads in review.

This one annoys me greatly at times. If I publish an ad, I understand it needs to go through the review process to ensure its an appropriate ad and abides by Facebook’s policies. I just wish Facebook would let me enable the ad while its in review. It doesn’t have to run, it just needs to be enabled. That way, as soon as it passes the review process it will begin running. Nope, I have to wait for the ad to be reviewed before I can enable it. This becomes a problem when an ad NEEDS to be run ASAP but the ad then just sits in review for hours for no reason. Now I have to watch this ad’s review status late into the night just so I can then enable it. It would be so easy if I could enable an ad during the review process and then the ad would just not serve to anybody if it doesn’t pass the review process.

15) Too many metrics with weird column presets.

This last one is just an opinion of mine I guess you could say. I think Facebook has way too much going on when it comes to metrics, with a specific nod to the preset columns in Ads Manager. Here are the defaults below. First off we have two different “performance” presets….one just has clicks added to it. That should probably just be one option. While we’re at it, “carousel engagement” could probably disappear since its this weird combination of “performance”, “delivery”, and “engagement”. Have you ever clicked on “cross-device”? When I think cross-device, I think about customer journey…how they started on mobile Facebook, then went to Adwords and clicked an ad on mobile, and then went to desktop and converted. Thats cross-device. Whatever this preset is, well, its nothing like I described above. Maybe I just have a different definition of “cross-device”. Maybe I am being way too over the top with this criticism, but its little things like this I think could help clean up the clutter in ads manager.

from RSSMix.com Mix ID 8217493 https://www.ppchero.com/things-facebook-ads-should-do-better/