#not the real guys | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

narcos-narcosmx · 2 years

Text

Reaction to _ |Ficlet 1

Reactions to a 🍆 pic

Okay just me thinking about that hilarious post I just reblogged. Credit to @purplesong1028 that ‘gets a dick pic’ meme is hilarious! I hope it’s okay to fangirl over it (original post) if not, I’m sorry and I’ll take this down.

Part two

I really need to prep for bed but…I’m just having fun with these and they aren’t really edited. Again this is just inspired by their post and out of fun. You know the show, you know the general warnings. 💕 Arte

Below is Ramón, Pacho, Isabella, Benjamin & Rafa

Ramón

You were playing video games with Ramón when his phone dinged. At first, he ignored it. It wasn’t until the third time that he picked it up. You watched as a look of annoyance quickly turned to pure amusement.

“What is it?” You asked.

Ramón hopped off the bed and quickly unbuckled his pants. Before you could ask what he was doing, he smiled at you wildly, then grabbed his phone with his other hand,

“I’m gonna send one back!”

Pacho

“You make the best martinis.” You said as you finished off your drink. You weren’t really a Martini person, but Pacho has the magic touch. The look he shot you in response is a clear, yeah I know.

Pacho stands and gathers the glasses for a refill. When he reaches the counter his phone buzzes. Pulling it out of his pockets, he stills as he looks at the screen. From his smile alone, you know whatever he’s looking at is amusing.

Pacho frees up both his hands then types, “send another one.”

Isabella

After a fun night out, you and a few others end up at some guys party. He’s someone Isabella knows and gives you all VIP treatment.

As you chill on the long couch, Isabella phone goes off. Not that you were being nosey, but you were sitting right next to her. So when she pulls up the screen and a very clear dick pick is starting at you, you nearly spit your drink out.

Isabella laughs, then looks at you. You know that look. She’s up to something.

She calls one of the guys over whose been drooling over her since you arrived. Barely holding back a laugh, she stands and pulls up her camera,

She looks the guy right in the eyes and says, “Drop your pants.”

Benjamin aka my sweet Min

Sinking into the office chair, Min pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. He’s tired. It’s been a long ass day. And all he wants is to get home to his wife and little girl.

Swiveling in the chair, he can see the crew downstairs, and ‘Mons cackle reaches the office. Benjamin narrow the blinds a little more then returns to the desk. Just as he reaches for a stack of papers, his phone buzzes in his pocket.

At first he smiles, maybe it’s a cute picture of his daughter, his wife likes to send those. But once he pulls the photo up, his smile drops to a frown.

A look of total disgust morphs his expression and Benjamin promptly deletes the photo and blocks the number.

“What the fuck?” He stands and rests his hands on his hips.

That’s it. He’s had enough for the day.

Rafa

When you arrived, Rafa had just finished watching Scarface, again. But you weren’t going to bust his bubble. At the sight of you, he jumped up to his feet and gave you the biggest hug.

Tonight you’re going dancing, and after a long work week, you’re really looking forward to it. A night out with Rafa is exactly what you need.

With one arm around your shoulders, he excitingly tells you about his newest strain and insists you try it before going out.

Before he can go on any further, his phone buzzes. Rafa steps away to get it the quickly joins your side. The moment he pulls up the screen he erupts on laughter.

Rafa immediately shows you the picture as he curls over with laughter.

“I gotta post this - “ he straightens up and pulls up his Instagram.

“Rafa I don’t think that a -“ you try to warn through your laughter.

“Done!” He showed you the phone.

He posted it.

#narcos Mexico #random thoughts inspired by another persons post #Ramon narcos #pacho herrera #isabella narcos #isabella bautista #benjamin narcos #benjamin arellano felix #ramon arellano felix #Rafa narcos #Rafa Quintero #not the real guys #you know the show you know the warning

80 notes · View notes

astronomical-bagel · 3 months

Text

#ok no but for real this is genuinely my friend group.#the only one that's a little iffy is the anime catgirl bc 98% of us are dudes. with the exception of me and one other #we even have a union guy 😭#side note chilchuck's name would 100% be Chris if he was a real guy. he's such a Chris. (I mean it COULD be chuck but. Chris is better)#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #senshi of izganda #izutsumi #marcille donato #laios touden #chilchuck tims #chilchuck #falin touden #astronomically random

50K notes · View notes

tik-tok-ify-the-tumblbeast · 7 months

Text

#amaury guichon #the chocolate guy #if ever i had to pick a real life wonka it would be him

43K notes · View notes

jailforwriter · 11 months

Text

Getting inspired to write is actually really easy! All you need to do is be the busiest you've ever been in your entire life and as far away from a computer as humanly possible. Hope this helps 🥰

#i just know the guys in the titan sub suddenly remembered all their abandoned wips and felt real crushed about it #writeblr #writing #writing inspiration #writing inspo #writing community #writing memes #writing humor #writing problems

70K notes · View notes

grasslandgirl · 8 months

Text

“no one will notice if you stop posting/talking/texting/etc” is the mind killer. it is the evil. it is the little childhood version of myself who feels so insignificant and unwanted but she IS wanted. I am wanted and loved and noticed even if I can’t see it right now

#I’m soooo normal guys i promise. i am fighting off the evil thoughts so bravely for real

36K notes · View notes

isjasz · 16 days

Text

Stellar death

10K notes · View notes

artkaninchenbau · 3 months

Text

A h-heartfelt reunion..?

Bonus

#Sir Crocodile #Monkey D Dragon #Emporio Ivankov #Dragodile #Crocodad #My art #One Piece #We're not gonna talk about the work I should be doing rn I have Severe Procrastinitis and I'm doing my best okay #Alternative version where it was both Crocodile and Garp beating Dragon's ass before Iva-chan joined in but that was too much effort lmao #I'm a believer in Dragon being a Wind Logia so don't worry guys he is 100% taking this beating intentionally #He knows what he did and he's dealing with the concequences of his actions. With grace.#You know I realize Iva-chan should be two whole meters taller than Crocodile but we're just gonna ignore that #Look Iva-chan taking Crocodile's side and being like ''Crocoboy is right you fucked up bad Dragon'' brings me joy #And for real I've been wanting to draw this for months. But never did because I had other shit to do. Which I still do #But. You know. Sometimes you need to draw a shitpost. It's ✨ self-care ✨#And appearently One Piece shitpost comics have become the thing I draw for myself on occassion

13K notes · View notes

allskywalkerswhine · 8 months

Text

in fics where luke gets plopped into the prequels i want every jedi within ten metres of him to think hes the weirdest jedi theyve ever seen. he has negative lightsaber form. he doesnt know what a kata is. he handstands when he meditates. his solution to sith is to try and have a chat. hes a political radical who keeps suggesting revolution. you ask him what the jedi code is and he says "kindness and compassion and helping those in need :) ". you ask how he used the force like that and he says some shit about how you are a luminous being limited only by your mind. the councils authority is just a suggestion. he is somehow the new favourite of both qui gon and yoda

35K notes · View notes

venussmilk · 3 months

Text

ik they dont have phones but u cant tell me chilchuck wouldnt go crazy on facebook reels

#digital art #fan art #dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #dunmeshi #laios touden #chilchuck tims #izutsumi #laios dunmeshi #chilchuck dunmeshi #izutsumi dungeon meshi #he would absolutely love facebook guys.... i mean hes a divorced father of three #lets be real #also laios and izutsumi would be those kids that have those leash backpacks

12K notes · View notes

cozylittleartblog · 11 months

Text

@staff if you [change] the [design] of the fucking [dashboard] i will kill you

edit. i want it on the actual post that i am not actually making a de-th threat against the staff. that's shitty. the caption quotes the fucking costco hot dog meme, which i originally said in the tags. if any staff member sees this please do Not take it personally

#dashboard #staff #tumblr update #comic #art #doodles #costco ceo about the price of a hot dog.png #i refuse to believe this is a real problem that site owners think people have #frankly i refuse to believe people had this issue with deviantart before eclipse #i am sorry you have to put about 15 minutes of effort into understanding a new website. feel better soon #my main blog doesn't have it yet but i logged into here to make this post and. i have it #this is fucking terrible. it would ahve been really really funny for april fools day but not as a permanent change #i hate it a Lot. i hate it so fucking much. oh . my god.#edit - guys i amnot actually sending de*th threats to staff it's the costco hot dog meme

28K notes · View notes

narcos-narcosmx · 2 years

Text

Reaction to _ | ficlet 2

Reaction to a 🍆 pic

This is a narcos-only Sideblog for @artemiseamoon

Part one

Thank you 😄 inspo credit to @purplesong1028 (original post). These are not really edited rambles. You know the show you know the warnings. All for fun. Enjoy!

This round: Maria, Cochiloco (ft. Chapo and Güero Palma), Steve Murphy (ft Javi) and my addition of Yessica

Maria aka my Queen

After putting the gifts in the car, Maria shut the truck and made her way to the front. Though she has people who can take care of tasks like this, she’s always been independent and prefers to do things herself. Except for the nights she likes to read in silence, then she prefers things to be brought to her.

With the holidays around the corner, she wanted to make sure she had the perfect gifts for her kids. And seeing the smiles on their faces as they open these up, is going to be well worth the long drive to this specific toy shop.

Just as Maria enters the car, her phone buzzes. Taking it out of her purse, unlocks her phone and stares at it with raised brows.

It’s a dick pic.

Maria take a closer look and shakes her head disapprovingly.

Definitely a dick pic.

Maria clears her throat and pressed hard on the number. The option to call pops up, she does.

It rings one, twice. Then a third time. When the person picks up, she goes off before they get a chance to speak -

She ends her thorough verbal assault with six words, spitting them out like venom, “YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF!”

Maria hangs up the phone.

Cochiloco

Ft. Chapo and Güero Palma

Being an assistant at Güeros office meant you saw a lot of funny things, between Cochi and Chapo, you were guaranteed a good laugh at least once a day. You’ve grown used to coming in, start of the day, and stumbling upon a joke.

So when you round the corner and hear their cacking, you know you’re in for something good. Then you enter the office and stop dead in your tracks. You feel your eyes grow wide and you nearly drop your coffee.

“What is that?!” You tilt your head slight, trying to decipher what you’re looking at. Then it hits you, it is that, it’s that blown up to small poster size.

Barely keeping it together, Cochi and Chapo curl over with laughter.

Cochi walks over to you, still laughing, “some son of a bitch sent me a dick pick so -“ more laughing “I posted it then printed it out-“ he howls louder and grabs his stomach

Chapo falls out of his chair.

Cochi points to him, “and this - “ still laughing , “sent one back!”

You shake your head and glance at Chapo, then Cochi.

“Whyyyy would you do that?” You turn your back to the giant dick staring at you.

“Because it’s funny!” Chapo and Cochi say at the same time.

Then the door opens. You catch the brief closed mouthed smile on Gueros lips as he enters. You also watch it drop.

“What the fuck?”

His response makes them laugh even harder and you start to laugh too.

Guero is too tired for this shit. Everything with Miguel and the plazas is stressing him out, and they’re here doing this?

He goes up to the wall, tears it down, then goes over to his desk. He sighs and wishes he was home with Lupe and the kids. Thinking of them alone, brings a smile back to his face.

Cochi kicks the crumpled paper over to Chapo, he’s hiding his laughter behind his arm. Chapo picks it up and puts it in the drawer.

You know them well enough to know, they’re definitely keeping it.

Steve

(Ft Javi)

Steve closes his eyes. It’s been a long day. He’s going to have fucking nightmares about paperwork. He’s going stir crazy in this office and needs some action soon.

Opening then again, he glimpses at the window, the moon is out and it must be about 7 o’clock now. He pours a glass of whiskey and sits back in the chair.

When his phone buzzes, he expects to see a text from Connie, but that’s not what he gets. It’s a text from an unknown number, a fully erect cock staring right at him.

“What the fuck?” Steve drops his phone on the desk and pushes it away from him.

Steve stares at the phone, then picks it up again. He types, “You should be ashamed of yourself.” Then presses send.

“Asshole.” Steve picks up his glass, takes a huge gulp, then gets back to the paperwork.

Javi walks in five minutes later with a fresh pack of cigarettes and some street food in a brown paper bag.

Steve sits up, “Fuck you Javi.”

“What did I do?” Javi looks at him innocently and puts the bag down.

Steve gets up and shows him the pic.

Javi snickers, “you think that’s me?”

“Isn’t it?”

“I’m offended. I thought we were friends.”

Steve looks at it again, “who the fuck would send me a dick pic then?”

“Better question, why’d you keep it?” Javi raised a brow , leaned against the desk and lit a cigarette

Steve flips him off then deletes the pic.

Javi chuckled, bringing the cigarette to his lips, “if you want to see mine -“

Steve walks out of the room.

Yessica

I adore her so added her in…

Zipping the dress closed, Yessica turns and looks in the mirror. She was playing for someone important tonight, the manager made sure to drive that home to everyone.

It would be a long night, but as long ad it paid well, it’s fine. Yessica finished the final touches of her outfit then grabs her purse.

She heads to the counter to get her phone when it starts to buzz. She slides the screen and opens the text.

Yessica snickers, then raised her brows.

Well, if this is a sign, tonight’s going to be interesting

She puts her purse down and replies,

“I’ve seen better.”

Three dots immediately pop up, vanish, pop up again then vanish.

Yessica chuckles then writes, “hey, maybe it’s cold out? Try again later?”

Three dots pop up, then vanish.

Yessica types another message, “heres a tip, don’t take it fresh out the shower.”

She presses send.

‘Not delivered’ pops up under her message.

“Guess I hurt his feelings .”

Yessica puts her phone in her purse, grabbed her keys, and heads out for the night.

#Maria narcos #Maria Elvira #cochiloco #Chapo narcos #Guero narcos #Steve Murphy #javier peña #yessica narcos #Güero Palma #you know the show you know the warning #not the real guys

10 notes · View notes

angrylesbianstereotype · 2 years

Text

Okay Walter White was actually pretty funny as a character bc he was so toxic that seasoned drug lords were like I cannot work w this man I have to put my mental health first

#like imagine you’re in the drug trade and some war criminal points out this musty old dweeb to you and is like #yeah that guy’s a real asshole #anti walter white #walter white hate blog #breaking bad #brba

111K notes · View notes

sophbun · 4 months

Text

my dad who works for sega just gave me this?

#shadow the hedgehog #sonic the hedgehog #sonic #sonic x shadow generations #my art #this is real guys i wouldnt lie to u

9K notes · View notes

poorly-drawn-mdzs · 11 days

Text

The squad of all time has arrived on scene.

#dungeon meshi #mithrun #Cithis Ofri #Pattadol #Fleki #Lycion #Otta #Happy Canary Debut Day! These guys wont really get to be very present until the next season of Dungeon Meshi #But I can still be excited to see them animated!!!#Shout out to Pattadol - I also tend to occupy 'The Punchline' niche of the friendgroup.#The punchline differs from 'The Jester' who willingly absorbs the jokes. The punchline is often unwillingly the joke.#You are either the one no one likes or the well beloved little-sibiling-esque friend. Good luck figuring out which!#Yes it is canon that Otta is into Women. YES she dates younger women and dumps them when they age.#This isn't a fan made bit. It's real.#Dungeon Meshi has no romance but it does have canonically queer characters.#Shipping is fine and all but it is a running theme in the series than *everyone* who expresses romantic interest in someone -#-finds that love unrequited. Just something to be mindful of to measure your expectations of this series!#Ah! In other housekeeping notes; I'm going to *try* and add Alt Text to my dungeon meshi thurday posts going forwards.#I might not be able to do it day of but I will try to get it done within a week.

6K notes · View notes

glassiskies · 7 months

Text

in which aziraphale reverts to old habits, crowley is outraged, and they still do not talk about it

#good omens #ineffable husbands #I need you guys to know I started this a month ago but couldn’t work on it bc of classes #and as soon as the quarter ended I inked colored and added an additional page in the span of like 5 days LMAO #aziraphale #crowley #also Crowley has only been made aware of real communication tm bc of nina and Maggie #I firmly believe aziraphale will not learn the art of saying what you mean until well into season 3 #yay miscommunication #comic #2023 art

11K notes · View notes

the-names-quinn · 3 months

Text

I have changed a lot from the kid I was when I was 13. Any type of love apart from cis/hetero relationships used to not compute for me, and now I'm out to 5 people in my day-to-day life. And honestly, I do kind of owe it a little bit(a whole lot) to Undertale for opening up a different life path. I could have ended up really freaking stupid and probably super depressed without it.

#undertale fandom #undertale #thank you guys so much for real #lgbtqia #lgbtq #deltarune #undertale meme

8K notes · View notes