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pumpkinpaix · 3 years

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Hello! Feel free not to answer this question if it is in any way too much, but I've been wondering about something concerning the "western" mdzs fandom. Lately, i have seen multiple pieces of fanart that use what is clearly Christian symbolism and sometimes downright iconography in depicting the characters. I'm a european fan, but it still makes me vaguely uneasy. I know that these things are rarely easy to judge. I'm definitely not qualified to do so and was wondering if you have an opinion

Hi there! thank you for your patience and for the interesting question! I’ve been thinking about this since i received this ask because it?? idk, it’s difficult to answer, but it also touches on a a few things that I find really interesting.

the short answer: it’s complicated, and I also don’t know what I feel!

the longer answer:

i think that this question is particularly difficult to answer because of how deeply christianity is tied to the western art and literary canon. so much of what is considered great european art is christian art! If you just take a quick glance at wiki’s page on european art, you can see how inextricable christianity is, and how integral christian iconography has been in the history of european art. If you study western art history, you must study christian imagery and christian canon because it’s just impossible to engage with a lot of the work in a meaningful way without it. that’s just the reality of it.

Christianity, of course, also has a strong presence in european colonial and imperialist history and has been used as a tool of oppression against many peoples and nations, including China. I would be lying if I said I had a good relationship with Christianity--I have always faced it with a deep suspicion because I think it did some very, very real damage, not just to chinese people, but to many cultures and peoples around the world, and that’s not a trauma that can be easily brushed aside or reconciled with.

here is what is also true: my maternal grandmother was devoutly christian. my aunt is devoutly christian. my uncle’s family is devoutly christian. my favorite cousin is devoutly christian. when I attended my cousin’s wedding, he had both a traditional chinese ceremony (tea-serving, bride-fetching, ABSURDLY long reception), and also a christian ceremony in a church. christianity is a really important part of his life, just as it’s important to my uncle’s family, and as it was important to my grandmother. I don’t think it’s my right or place to label them as simply victims of a colonialist past--they’re real people with real agency and choice and beliefs. I think it would be disrespectful to act otherwise.

that doesn’t negate the harm that christianity has done--but it does complicate things. is it inherently a bad thing that they’re christian, due to the political history of the religion and their heritage? that’s... not a question I’m really interested in debating. the fact remains that they are christian, that they are chinese, and that they chose their religion.

so! now here we are with mdzs, a chinese piece of media that is clearly Not christian, but is quickly gaining popularity in euroamerican spaces. people are making fanart! people are making A LOT of fanart! and art is, by nature, intertextual. a lot of the most interesting art (imo) makes deliberate use of that! for example (cyan art nerdery time let’s go), Nikolai Ge’s What is Truth?

I love this painting! it’s notable for its unusual depiction of christ: shabby, unkempt, slouched, in shadow. if you look for other paintings of this scene, christ is usually dignified, elegant, beautiful, melancholy -- there’s something very humanizing and humbling about this depiction, specifically because of the way it contrasts the standard. it’s powerful because we as the audience are expected to be familiar with the iconography of this scene, the story behind it, and its place in the christian canon.

you can make similar comments about Gentileschi’s Judith vs Caravaggio’s, or Manet’s Olympia vs Ingres’ Grande Odalisque -- all of these paintings exist in relation to one another and also to the larger canon (i’m simplifying: you can’t just compare one to another directly in isolation etc etc.) Gauguin’s Jacob Wrestling the Angel is also especially interesting because of how its portrayal of its content contrasts to its predecessors!

or! because i’m really In It now, one of my favorite paintings in the world, Joan of Arc by Bastien-Lepage:

I just!!! gosh, idk, what’s most interesting to me in this painting is the way it seems to hover between movements: the hyperrealistic, neoclassical-esque take on the figure, but the impressionistic brushstrokes of the background AAA gosh i love it so much. it’s really beautiful if you ever get a chance to see it in person at the Met. i’m putting this here both because i personally just really like it and also as an example of how intertextuality isn’t just about content, but also about visual elements.

anyways, sorry most of this is 19thc, that was what i studied the most lol.

(a final note: if you want to read about a really interesting painting that sits in the midst of just a Lot of different works, check out the wiki page on Géricault’s Raft of the Medusa, specifically under “Interpretation and Legacy”)

this is all a really long-winded way of getting to this point: if you want to make allusory fanart of mdzs with regards to western art canon, you kind of have to go out of your way to avoid christian imagery/iconography, especially when that’s the lens through which a lot of really intensely emotional art was created. many of my favorite paintings are christian: Vrubel’s Demon, Seated, Perov’s Christ in the Garden of Gethsemane, Ge’s Conscience, Judas, Bastien-Lepage’s Joan of Arc, as shown above. that’s not to say there ISN’T plenty of non-christian art -- but christian art is very prominent and impossible to ignore.

so here are a few pieces of fanwork that I’ve seen that are very clearly making allusions to christian imagery:

1. this beautiful pietà nielan by tinynarwhals on twitter

2. a lovely jiang yanli as our lady of tears by @satuwilhelmiina

3. my second gif in this set here, which I will also show below:

i’m only going to talk about mine in depth because well, i know exactly what i was thinking when I put this gif together while I can’t speak for anyone else.

first: the two lines of the song that I wanted to use for lan xichen were “baby, I’m a fighter//in the robes of a saint” because i felt that they fit him very well. of course, just the word “saint” evokes catholicism, even if it’s become so entwined in the english language that it’s taken on a secular meaning as well.

second: when I saw this scene, my immediate thought was just “PIETÀ!!” because LOOK at that composition! lan xichen’s lap! nie mingjue lying perpendicular to it! the light blue/white/silver of lan xichen in contrast to the darker robes of both nie mingjue and meng yao! not just that, but the very cool triangular structure of the image is intensely striking, and Yes, i Do love that it simultaneously ALSO evokes deposition of christ vibes. (baxia as the cross.... god..... is that not the Tightest Shit) does this make meng yao joseph of arimathea? does it make him john the evangelist? both options are equally interesting, I think when viewed in relation to his roles in the story: as a spy in qishan and as nmj’s deputy. maybe he’s both.

anyways, did I do this intentionally? yes, though a lot of it is happy accident/discovered after the fact since I’m relying on CQL to have provided the image. i wanted to draw attention to all of that by superimposing that line over that image! (to be clear: I didn’t expect it to all come through because like. that’s ridiculous. the layers you’d have to go through to get from “pretty lxc gifset” --> “if we cast nie mingjue as a christ figure, what is the interesting commentary we could do on meng yao by casting him as either joseph of arimathea or john the evangelist” are like. ok ur gonna need to work a little harder than slapping a song lyric over an image to achieve an effect like that.)

the point of this is: yes, it’s intentionally christian, yes I did this, yes I am casting these very much non-christian characters into christian roles for this specific visual work -- is this okay?

I obviously thought it was because I made it. but would I feel the same about a work that was written doing something similar? probably not. I think that would make me quite uncomfortable in most situations. but there’s something about visual art that makes it slightly different that I have trouble articulating -- something about how the visual often seeks to illustrate parallels or ideas, whereas writing characters as a different religion can fundamentally change who those characters are, the world they inhabit, etc. in a more... invasive?? way. that’s still not quite right, but I genuinely am not sure how to explain what i mean! I hope the general idea comes across. ><

something else to think about is like, what are pieces I find acceptable and why?

what makes the pieces above that reference christian imagery different than this stunning nieyao piece by @cyandemise after klimt’s kiss? (warnings for like, dead bodies and vague body horror) like i ADORE this piece (PLEASE click for fullview it’s worth it for the quality). it’s incredibly beautiful and evocative and very obviously references a piece of european art. I have no problem with it. why? because it isn’t explicitly christian? it’s still deeply entrenched in western canon. klimt certainly made other pieces that were explicit christian references.

another piece I’d like to invite you all to consider is this incredible naruto fanart of sakura and ino beheading sasuke after caravaggio’s judith. (warnings for beheading, blood, etc. you know.) i also adore this piece! i think it’s very good both technically and conceptually. the reference that it makes has a real power when viewed in relation to the roles of the characters in their original story -- seeing the women that sasuke fucked over and treated so disrespectfully collaborating in his demise Says Something. this is also!! an explicitly christian reference made with non-christian japanese characters. is this okay? does it evoke the same discomfort as seeing mdzs characters being drawn with christian iconography? why or why not?

the point is, I don’t think there’s a neat answer, but I do think there are a lot of interesting issues surrounding cultural erasure/hegemony that are raised by this question. i don’t think there are easy resolutions to any of them either, but I think that it’s a good opportunity to reexamine our own discomfort and try and see where it comes from. all emotions are valid but not all are justified etc. so I try to ask, is it fair? do i apply my criticisms and standards equally? why or why not? does it do real harm, or do i just not like it? what makes one work okay and another not?

i’ve felt that there’s a real danger with the kind of like, deep moral scrutiny of recent years in quashing interesting work in the name of fear. this morality tends to be expressed in black and white, good and bad dichotomies that i really do think stymies meaningful conversation and progress. you’ll often see angry takes that boil down to things like, “POC good, queer people good, white people bad, christianity bad” etc. without a serious critical examination of the actual issues at hand. I feel that these are extraordinarily harmful simplifications that can lead to an increased insularity that isn’t necessarily good for anyone. there’s a fine line between asking people to stay in their lane and cultural gatekeeping sometimes, and I think that it’s something we should be mindful of when we’re engaging in conversations about cultural erasure, appropriation etc.

PERHAPS IT IS OBVIOUS that I have no idea where that line falls LMAO since after all that rambling I have given you basically nothing. but! I hope that you found it interesting at least, and that it gives you a bit more material to think on while you figure out where you stand ahaha.

was this just an excuse to show off cool (fan)art i like? maybe ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

(ko-fi)

#Anonymous #asks and replies #art #fanart #art history #christianity #mdzs #mdzs meta #meta #mine #mymeta #cyan gets too deep in the weeds #lmfao this post is a mess ive been staring at it for like a week and at this point im just gonna post it to the wall and keep moving asldfj #hope you enjoyed

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rikalovesrice · 3 years

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My Thoughts on Trollhunters : Rise of the Titans

WARNING : ALL THE SPOILERS IN THIS REVIEW

Mmmmm. Okay. So I just finished the movie. I’m fatigued as always so this’ll be a bit of a mess lol. Gotta spew the thoughts while they’re still fresh, y’all know how it is.

Right out the gate, I definitely want to talk about the things I loved.

The animation was, of course, phenomenal and gorgeous!

Voice acting was incredible as always

MUSIC SLAPPED

Douxie. I just loved seeing Douxie again and honestly kept my eyes trained on him for most the of movie lol

OK DOUXIE AND NARI SWITCHING?? BODIES??? Definitely didn’t see that coming and I legit started screaming lol

Nari in Douxie’s body is the most precious, chaotic, and wholesome thing like holy cow that was so adorable LOOKIT DOUXIE CROUCHING AND CRAWLING AROUND ON ALL FOURS WITH THOSE NOODLE LIMBS OF HIS I CAN’T --

We called Nari’s mind control and Douxie trying to reason with her!

In the very few scenes they were together, Douxie’s love and affection for Nari really came through. You could really feel how much he cared about her. ALSO THAT TENDER HUG AND NARI’S LITTLE HAPPY SQUEAK MY HEART NO--

Loved Barbara. Always love Barbara.

Walter and Barbara getting engaged

Nomura back in action

Claire being the powerful sorceress she’s become

Loved seeing Aja, Krel, and Varvatos all together again.

NARI VS SKRAEL WAS ALL SORTS OF EPIC AND CRUSHING EMOTIONS.

The way Douxie yelled Nari’s name and ran to her after she died and the remnants of her magic falling all around him, like she was saying goodbye, just *UGLY CRYING*

It was so cool to see Charlie out of his den and flying about like the mighty dragon he is

Loved the Guardians of Arcadia pulling Excaliber out together.

All the gang all going after Bellroc together

YES JIM MY BOOOOOOY

BLINKY DIDN’T DIE

Aarrgh I love you so much

Stuart, what a bro!

We saw a hint of mercy in Bellroc towards the end.

Toby’s death... That was a huge curveball. Jim might as well have cut my heart out with Excaliber as he sobbed over his best friend.

Uh.....um....and.....Er...what else........ .___.

..........Alright so.......It’s about to get a bit brutal from here on out as I talk about the things I didn’t like at all. And the really sad thing is, at least to me, the cons far outweigh the pros in this movie. Because I’m actually having difficulty picking out things I enjoyed, they were so few and far between...which really sucks.

So here we go.

Gosh, where to begin... I guess I’ll go ahead and say this : I’m really disappointed.

Like as I’m here typing this, I’m just thinking, “...That was it? That was the movie?? The big finale???”

So much of this movie just felt....unnecessary. I hate to say almost like filler. The entire intro re-caping the series really wasn’t needed. And then Toby went and restated it all again when he was being interrogated. The pacing, oh my gosh...Guys, the pacing in this movie was not good. The action started and it never seemed to stop. There wasn’t a single moment of rest, of levity, of our characters just being themselves, getting to know each other, being friends outside of the battle. No Reckless Club Segment. No fun, just... I mean Claire and Aja didn’t speak to each other at all. Douxie and Toby hardly interacted. Steve was turned into a gross male pregnancy joke. Jim and Krel barely spoke. Douxie and Aja had nothing to say to each other. Even Aja and Krel didn’t have any moments together. The list goes on. The whole movie was just go, go, go. And it’s so frustrating because there was time for it but it was poorly executed.

Like was the whole break-in to the Chinese Trollmarket really necessary?? Guys, I really found myself not caring. I didn’t care to see this random side quest involving an insignificant new troll character and a Trollmarket that had little to no bearing on the plot. Did I love seeing Charlie, Archie, Blinky, and Claire? Of course! But these scenes were so pointless. So needless. They could’ve written other ways for all our heroes to go after the chronosphere (Maybe we could’ve had Zoe for crying out loud). But instead this vital artifact was the hands of a character we don’t know and don’t care about in a place that turned out to have basically nothing to do with anything.

Deaths. The deaths in this movie. Because of the pacing in this movie, there wasn’t nearly enough time for the emotional impacts to sink in. Nomura? Gone and the only ones mourning her are Aaarrgh and Douxie, who barely knew her. Walter’s death was handled better since we got to see Jim and Barbara actually having a moment to mourn him. The weight of Nari’s death was singlehandedly carried by Douxie, but even that was over before it started. The immense gravity of Toby’s death, which really got to me, was also short-lived to make way for an ending that...I don’t know.

ALSO DOUXIE JUST??? BEING OKAY WITH HIS FAMILIAR, THE ONE WHO RAISED HIM AND WENT THROUGH SO MUCH WITH HIM FOR CENTURIES, LEAVING HIM FOREVER TO BE TRAPPED IN THAT DUMB TROLLMARKET WITH CHARLIE LIKE???

“I hope he’s happy.”

WHAT. THE. EVERLASTING. FRICK.

Douxie’s reaction objectively doesn’t make a shred of sense. Geez, it’s almost like Douxie was expecting Archie to up and leave him someday to be with Charlegmane. Just...what???

What also frustrates me so much is how this movie undid so much characterization and development that happened in Wizards. Or more like all that development didn’t even matter.

What was the point of Steve’s arc in Wizards if he was just going to be reduced to...this?

I was so excited to see Douxie really being a Master Wizard. To see him lead the Guardians of Arcadia alongside Jim. To see him in action as Successor to Merlin and Protector of this Realm.

But no.

Douxie, who had such an incredible arc in Wizards and a character who’s come to mean so much to me in my life, was nerfed and sidelined.

And then time restarts and I can’t help but wonder why any of this mattered at all. What the heck was the freaking point of the suffering, the loss, the pain, the growth, enduring and overcoming so much, the friendships and family spanning across three shows... All gone. Starting all over. Undoing everything, except what Jim went through. As much as I love Jim, I didn’t think he’d be the only character I’d be getting closure for at the grand finale of this entire franchise. But that’s what happened and I really hate it.

Just...all in all, this movie wasn’t satisfying. Not to me. It had its good moments. But not nearly enough. The comedy was misplaced and fell flat. The climax was sorely anticlimactic and didn’t hold a candle to Eternal Knight. The writing, the direction, characterization...For some reason it was all lost and confused and none of it felt right and so much didn’t make sense.

I’m not at all upset with the writers, though, because they still pulled through and did what they could. When the movie did something right, it was beautiful. The things I loved about it I truly adored. No, I’m not upset in the least bit with any of the creative team.

I’m upset with Netflix. I’m upset that Wizards was robbed of the seasons it should’ve had. I’m upset with big cooperations stifling creators. I’m upset that this’ll be it. This is the ending we got and nothing can be done about it.

Aaron did say there’s every possibility for the franchise to continue in some capacity, and I’m hoping for that someday. Because so much, too much, has been left unanswered. So much left to be explored that couldn’t. But until then....I guess this is it. This is what we get.

Now, I want to remind everyone that this is my own personal experience with the movie. These are all my opinions. If you enjoyed every second the movie, that’s wonderful! And who knows how my thoughts will change upon another viewing. But in the meantime, Rise of the Titans really missed the mark for me. I wanted found family badassery and fluff. But nope. Just fighting and heaviness and no payoff. It’s such a letdown...a real shame.

But yeah...Thanks to any and everyone who read to the end of this haha

I still love Tales of Arcadia. It’s a series that has blessed and inspired me so much as an artist, writer, and as a person in general. I do want to keep making ToA content for a while. Cause this movie isn’t the end. Not my ending, at least.

I’ll continue to hope for more Tales of Arcadia in the future (a Douxie spin-off series please Lord pleaaase). We shall see. Until then, fics and fanart fixing this mess galore haha

Until next time everyone! God bless!

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konaizumi · 3 years

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A Tale of Thousand Stars ep 9 thoughts/reaction

so gmmtv really decided to play with us this morning with those subs huh

au where torfun lives and finds a girlfriend who gives her all the love she deserves

they really give us this cute scene with torfun and phupha then come at me with “when i come back from bangkok” and remind me that torfun never comes back

the chaos of the scene where they bring phupha in

poor tian just hovering, wanting to do something, but unable to do anything to help

the tenderness of tian at his bedside and falling asleep next to him

thank you to dr nam for admitting his mistakes and apologizing

“i’m scared of losing everything i have right now” how did phupha hear this and still think tian would be happier elsewhere

tian’s dad keeps trying to use the mom as an excuse and it pisses me off bc like, they can visit?? she can see him whenever she wants, and tian would’ve moved out eventually or did she think tian would live with them forever? and i get that the mom would be concerned about tian living in a remote village but like she could adapt once she saw that tian was happy

like just say you don’t approve of your son being a poor volunteer teacher and go

“if you didn’t have fun, why would you run away from home?” the real answer that tian doesn’t want to say out loud is because he wasn’t happy at home

and tian’s dad just...doesn’t get it, doesn’t get why tian is happier here than he was at home, still thinks this is some kind of rebellion and it’s so frustrating for both of them

tian keeps talking about how he knows he eventually has to go home and i wonder if it’s ever occurred to him that he doesn’t actually have to, that he can choose the village, that he’s an adult and he can choose what to do with the rest of his life

i’m sorry but the matching slings were so distracting for me in this scene

the theme of self forgiveness in this ep is so good bc tian feels so guilty and he feels like he needs to make it up to torfun but it’s not torfun’s forgiveness that he needs it’s his own

especially bc torfun would be happy that at least her heart allowed someone else to live

god this whole scene is just so beautiful, with the sun shining behind them

when phupha said that he was also thinking about tian when he almost died and then cradled tian’s hand

so my predictions last week that the dad was involved in illegal stuff were way off, i genuinely so surprised that it was phupha who had been reporting to him (though in hindsight it does make more sense) but i slapped the table so hard when that happened

but oof, the angst is so real here and i love it

tian feels like his entire life has been lead and shaped by his family’s wealth and privilege and the village is the one thing he was able to do on his own and his relationship with phupha was genuine, then he finds out that this too was bc of his family’s wealth

and at this point i think even tian knows that phupha didn’t do all of that for wealth so he tries to get phupha to just say it, say that he genuinely cares for tian but phupha won’t say it and even confirms it and even if tian doesn’t fully believe him, phupha’s still being mean and saying that on purpose to hurt him and it does hurt

so tian accuses phupha of caring for tian for his own gain and even though that’s what phupha wants him to think it still hurts phupha to know that tian would believe everything he did was fake

and they just lash out at each other out of their own hurt

then phupha accuses tian of just having fun even though they both know that’s not true and it makes tian feel like the one person who understood him doesn’t actually see him

also i think it’s funny that phupha tried to be all mean for the express purpose of scaring tian off so he’d go home but tian, being the little shit he is, just digs his heels in harder

also i truly can not express enough how much i love and appreciate khama, like no wonder longtae is such a good boi when he was raised by khama

ugh, i can see the struggle in phupha’s eyes where he wants to drop the act and comfort tian so badly

poor longtae is so sad to lose his friend

tian is such a good teacher and it makes him so happy, how can anybody think he’d be better off doing something else

dr “despite all evidence to the contrary, i’m a doctor, not a therapist” nam

fuck, these scenes are supposed to be serious but i could not stop laughing every time I saw phupha with that fucking beard

the father’s like “i know my son well” like bitch, no you don’t, otherwise you would realize that tian is happier than he’s been in a long time and he’s not staying in the village as some way to spite you, it’s just that you and your lifestyle don’t make him happy

im sorry i still cant get over the beard

“im okay” that’s not what your hobo beard says

everybody keeps saying tian wouldn’t have listened if phupha asked nicely but did y’all really think asking meanly would work on this boy who stayed in the beginning out of spite toward phupha

they’re finally admitting their feelings so why does it have to be so heartbreaking?

tian wants to stay so badly and he wants phupha to ask him to stay so badly

phupha says tian doesn’t understand (why they can’t be together and why tian has to leave) but it’s really phupha who doesn’t understand

he genuinely thinks that tian was happy in his old life (and honestly why wouldn’t he?) and that tian is only staying in the village to assuage his guilt over torfun before leaving again to resume his old happy life, and that asking tian to stay would be depriving him of that happiness

but the village, teaching, phupha are all his happiness, he’s not giving anything up by staying but he’s giving everything up by leaving

and i think tian doesn’t fully understand that this is how phupha thinks so he doesn’t know how to explain to phupha what it would actually mean to him to stay

i also love how this show isn’t downplaying the other bonds tian has made, he wouldn’t just be staying for phupha, he would be staying for the kids, for the other rangers, for longate and dr nam--the whole village has become his family

tian looked really cute the way he bounced over to khama

god i can’t wait for next ep when tian decided to stay in the village forever and the angst is over and he and the kids get to celebrate and the kids don’t have to deal with the constant cycle of new teachers

longtae is baby and he just wants to keep his friend

tian not being able to count the stars because he can’t stop crying :(

we’re gonna find out what torfun’s wish was next ep and it’ll be something like the kids or the village or phupha being happy and it’ll be sweet as we and the characters realize that tian already carried out her wish without even knowing, no magic necessary

also i love that they used the version of the ost sung by aye (torfun) bc it really set the mood and also her voice is beautiful, i might like it better than the original

“you should do everything for yourself and not for someone else” it’s painful bc if tian really wanted to live his life for himself that would mean staying but phupha only thinks he’s staying bc of torfun

i need fanart of torfun’s ghost hugging tian and saying thank you

but your story doesn’t have to end!!!

we finally get to learn about the ring and it’s literally phupha’s heart and he gives it to tian and still sends tian away?!?

im not crying, you’re crying

tian is doing the lord’s work shaving off that ugly beard

the way his thumb brushes his lip

so, great ep as always, very angsty, both more and in different ways than i expected

can’t wait for next week when everyone finally gets to be happy, i will totally cry when tian tries to leave the village and is saying goodbye to everyone

#atots #1000 stars #a tale of a thousand stars #atots spoilers #1000 stars spoilers #atots ep9 #konaizumi reactions

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lilydalexf · 3 years

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Old School X is a project interviewing X-Files fanfic authors who were posting fic during the original run of the show. New interviews are posted every Tuesday.

Interview with Circe Invidiosa

Circe Invidiosa has 11 stories at Gossamer, but there are even more X-Files stories at her website. Some of my favs I’ve recced here before, like Make It Worse and Slap a Goatee On Me and Call Me Evil. She also made a bunch of X-Files collage art, including some cover art for fics (hers and others), which you probably saw if you were reading fic back when authors posted fics on their own websites where art could be shared. Big thanks to Circe Invidiosa for doing this interview.

Does it surprise you that people are still interested in reading your X-Files fanfics and others that were posted during the original run of the show (1993-2002)?

Well, it would surprise me if people did read my fic. As it happens, I don't hear much feedback from my fic these days. Probably because the bulk of it is on Gossamer and my own site rather than AO3. Also, I was never a BNA. I worked a lot behind the scenes – hosting other authors' sites and making fanart and dustjackets. I think that's what I'd be remembered for, if anything.

What do you think of when you think about your X-Files fandom experience?

I miss the collective excitement and discussions we had as groups. When you got in with a group in the XF fandom, you felt like you knew everybody there. Now the fandom feels a little faceless except for the people I still follow from my old groups.

Social media didn't really exist during the show's original run. How were you most involved with the X-Files online (atxc, message board, email mailing list, etc.)?

Most of my experience was on Yahoo Groups. I joined Scullyfic while it was still there and then E-muse when it became an e-mail list, which I'm still a part of. I was part of several Yahoo Groups (can't remember all of them now), where I'd post my fic, RealPlayer slideshows (remember those?!), and collages. I never really took part in discourse because I'm shy and don't think anyone cares about my opinions (still don't!). The e-mail address I used for those groups was purged a couple of years ago, so I've lost all those messages.

What did you take away from your experience with X-Files fic or with the fandom in general?

My take away is that fanfic made me a better writer, thanks to having some great betas, and it made me a better professional writer for it (my real-life work is writing but not fun writing) because I learned to take criticism.

I also used to make a lot of fanart, collages and dustjackets for fic mostly. My big take away from that was that I really got into graphics and I got super proficient at Photoshop, which helped my own artistic endeavours and photography. I didn't realize how much skill I had developed until I've had to help someone with their graphics or photo editing.

What was it that got you hooked on the X-Files as a show?

My mother was watching X-Files before I was and she was raving about it. I don't have a great relationship with my mom, but one thing she was usually right about was TV shows. It's where I got my love of Sci-Fi.

I think the first episode I watched was Ice, which definitely hooked me. As for when the shipping started, I remember we were watching Lazarus, and when Mulder was yelling at Lula (I had to look that up) about hurting the hostage Scully, my mom said, "Oh, he's so in love with her." And I was all, "What?! Pfff." But then I could not stop thinking about it. And then I thought about it way, way too much.

What got you involved with X-Files fanfic?

I was in my late 20s, and it was around the end of S7 and I kept thinking about what if these two dumb idiots actually talked one day. And I kept thinking about dialogue in my head about what they'd actually say. The internet was still in its infancy back then, but I'd seen fan sites here and there. So I decided to search around to see if other people were talking about it and thinking about it like I was. I was such a noob I'd never even heard of fanfic. Imagine my delight when I discovered it. I found a few stories and thought, 'Well, I can do that.' And I wrote up my first story, found a place to post it (wasn't Ephemeral the best?), got some kind feedback, found a really nice person (not sure she wants to be named since she used her real name in the fandom back in the day) who encouraged me a lot and directed me to all the e-mail lists and Yahoo Groups that I needed to be on, and then, Bob's your uncle, I wrote more and more.

What is your relationship like now to X-Files fandom?

Periphery. Most of my experience in any fandom is now on Tumblr because that's where my attention span is. Show me pretty pictures and funny stuff. I am old now and don't want to think hard.

Were you involved with any fandoms after the X-Files? If so, what was it like compared to X-Files?

Veronica Mars was my next fandom experience. A number of my XF friends got me hooked on VM. The VM fandom was a LOT younger compared to the XF fandom. When I joined the XF fandom, I was the kid compared to most of the other fans who were all goddesses and royalty in my eyes. But in the VM fandom, I was in my 30s and the rest of the fandom were all in their early 20s if not younger. It often showed, so I stayed out of discussions and just posted my fic once I started writing it. I took a new handle (invida) when I started writing VM fic. Just in case these kids felt like my writing sucked, I didn't want it getting back to the XF fandom that I’d branched out and failed spectacularly.

By then fandom experiences had moved over to LiveJournal. I never really got involved in the discourse or the fandom fights. I knew what people were saying and where the schisms were, but I was all about the fanfic and the pretty pictures. Most of my LJ friends just discussed the episodes and posted their fic and that was good with me.

What got me writing fic for VM was Anjou's brilliant VM fic Into the Blue. Seriously, if you love VM S1, read her fic. Just so beautiful.

VM was also where started writing a WIP, which was a wild trip. I wrote a much-loved WIP called Damn, Damn the Circumstance which people still ask me about finishing to this day. Someday…*wistful sighs*

Who are some of your favorite fictional characters? Why?

Scully. She was everything! Lapsed Catholic, degrees in science, skeptic, always trying to work within the rules but still not taking crap. Yeah, she was the best.

Veronica Mars was great until she wasn't. I have a lot of issues with her beyond S2. And don't even talk to me about S4. For me, S1 was the best, I enjoyed the movie, the books were okay, but nothing else happened after that. NOTHING.

And the first character I ever loved was Princess Leia. She was also everything to me growing up. I wanted to be her. I still do.

Do you ever still watch The X-Files or think about Mulder and Scully?

Now and then. Not as much as I used to. I sometimes have it on in the background when I'm doing other things. Back before the pandemic, my BFF and I would have get togethers where we would play Scrabble, eat a lot of candy, and binge several XF episodes. I miss doing that. Hopefully, we will get back to that soon.

Do you ever still read X-Files fic? Fic in another fandom?

I am not an active XF fanfic reader right now. I will read any stories my friends put out. Otherwise, I only occasionally read some I come across on Tumblr in my feed, but I am not seeking them out. I will beta for any XF author who asks me as well.

I am reading fic in other fandoms though – Endeavour, Broadchurch, Sherlock…huh, I'm just realizing that's a lot of British stuff. I have been really into British detective series for the last few years.

Do you have any favorite X-Files fanfic stories or authors?

I used to run an XF fic recommendation site called How Will It End usually with at least one other person (I went through at least 4 partners on that project because I'm a control freak). We'd compile our recs and then I'd post them on my site. We'd also feature authors we really liked and interview them. Not unlike these interviews!

I'm terrible at giving feedback/comments. So I solved that problem by making a rec site. That way I could tell authors I loved their fics by recommending them. I didn't have to comment, I'd just say, 'I'd like to rec your fic'. And then they'd get promotion. Win-win. Back in those days, the fandom would absolutely roast you for promoting your own fic, so to get on a rec site was a big deal. Not that I had a popular rec site or anything. But I think authors really enjoyed being asked.

All that to say I've liked a lot of fics. I can pull up the archives of HWIE and show you all the faves I liked. :)

What is your favorite of your own fics, X-Files and/or otherwise?

Back in the day, E-muse would hold Improv Challenges, where other members would give you a prompt that you had to include in your fic. I was always really proud of the stories I created from those challenges (No Earthly Means and Elephant in the Room if you want to read them).

I enjoyed writing Dead to Rights which is an XF/Dead Like Me crossover because I loved the challenge of writing a crossover. It was the first crossover I ever tried writing even though I only recently published it.

Otherwise, I like re-reading In a Graveyard, Importuning Life for Life, and Some By Virtue Fall. Of my more recent fic, I like Slap a Goatee on Me and Call Me Evil because the premise was ridiculous and I think it's funny as all get out.

Probably my favourite of my VM fic was Stay Outta Riverdale. Because: 1. The title is a Simpsons reference who doesn't love a Simpsons reference? And 2. I think I was hilarious throughout it.

Do you think you'll ever write another X-Files story? Or dust off and post an oldie that for whatever reason never made it online?

I'm always open to writing more fic (and, of course, I don't mean my WIPs…don't look at me like that). Lately, my only motivation has been from writing prompts on Tumblr. I haven't had anyone give me a prompt in over a year, so here we are. I have snippets of dialogue in journals and word documents that have never found their way into stories. I'd be happy to dust off any of those and shoehorn them into a new story.

Do you still write fic now? Or other creative work?

The last fanfic I wrote was a mini-fic over a year ago (with a prompt from Lilydale!). I've written a bit of original fiction but I haven't been able to finish it. Otherwise, I do have a number of real life hobbies which are where my creative outlets lie now.

Where do you get ideas for stories?

Lately, challenges and prompts. It used to be from wanting to see more from a scene. I really had a thing for fill-in-the-blanks or scene continuations. And sometimes my motivation is just plain old spite. :)

What's the story behind your pen name?

Circe Invidiosa is the title of a painting by John William Waterhouse. Love the colours and the absolute malice on the face of the subject. It felt like a good pen name – the envious witch. That's me!

I chose it when I posted my first XF fic (which I cringe to read now, ugh so terrible) without knowing there was already a Circe in the fandom. Whoops. I tried to go by the full Circe Invidiosa or Invidiosa as much as possible after realizing that (invidiosa is my url and my username on a lot of sites, etc.). Now I think that I've been around long enough that it doesn't matter as much but I still like it.

As I said, I took the name Invida for the VM fandom which is just a shortening of Invidiosa.

Do your friends and family know about your fic and, if so, what have been their reactions?

My significant other knows and that was quite a reveal (oh how awkward). However, the SO has been very supportive and has read all my stories since the reveal and sometimes betas them. The SO also wants us to collaborate on writing some original fiction but we haven't found a project that works for both of us creatively or timewise.

My BFF knows because I dragged her into the online fandom. We've known each other since we were 14, but our love of XF really solidified our bond in our 20s. She wrote some short but sweet fics under the penname Helen Quilley which I bullied her into posting, and we wrote Of Ladies Most Deject and Wretched together. She is mostly embarrassed that she wrote fanfic now but we still fangirl together.

No one else really knows other than fandom folks I've met in real life. And some friends know I've written 'short stories' but I don't elaborate. I work in a stodgy, uptight industry where anything fun or actually having a life is frowned upon.

Is there a place online (tumblr, twitter, AO3, etc.) where people can find you and/or your stories now?

Over the first lockdown, I got my shit together and got my fic site, invidiosa.com, up and running again. My site houses fic by Rain (now @doctorhelena on Tumblr and AO3), Helen Quilley, ML (who I miss so much), Folieadeux, Shelba, TLynn, Oracle, Piper Sargasso, Diehard, and me. And I made all their dustjackets (except Folie's). The site got hacked a few years back and it was so much work to get running again that I put it off for years and years. I still feel terrible that I did not get the site back up before ML passed away, especially when ML had asked me about it a few months before she passed.

Anyway, all my XF fic is here: circe.invidiosa.com. I have 3 of my newer XF stories on AO3. And my fic-LJ also has some of my stories. Some of the newer stories are on Tumblr but the tagging is so erratic that I'd have to list several tags before you'd find them all. I don't know why I haven't moved everything over to AO3. Probably laziness.

I'm @invidiosa on Tumblr. I'm still on E-muse. I'm still on LJ. I'm always reachable by e-mail (invidiosa at gmail).

Is there anything else you'd like to share with fans of X-Files fic?

Thanks for reading, writing, and commenting. It is always appreciated.

(Posted by Lilydale on January 5, 2021)

#new post #old school x #xfiles fanfic #xf fanfic #xf fanfic author interviews #circe invidiosa

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dogmeatthedead · 3 years

Text

How Deathstroke and Wintergreen met

Best friends; they can be a good influence or someone that you raise hell with. The friendship between Slade Wilson and William Wintergreen most definitely falls squarely into the latter. From heroic deeds, to not so heroic ones, from emotional moments to silly pranks, they seem to be best of friends. So where did this deep bond come from and just how strong is it really? But before that I want to talk real quick about their relationship. Don't get me wrong, I love it, I really do but....... it's not exactly healthy. I'm not saying its bad, just that its maybe not the healthiest.

^some fanart I commissioned years ago now

This is a quick introduction, and talks the most about loyalty, so you won't understand what I'm talking about here. I just wanted to keep this relativity short because trust me, I could keep going on and on, but this is just the introduction if you will before I go on about the more complicated stuff.

Which version can I trust?

As so many things are with comic continuity, there are multiple different origins, however rather than go for the total slap in the face that is the version from Deathstroke rebirth, I shall go with the far superior Pre New 52’s version.

The Beginning

Ironically, it all began because Slade and Will switched roles.

Now I do have a purpose for saying this. Slade is the “villain” of the friendship, while Will is often seen as the moral compass; and while I do have issues with this form of classification, it works with what I’m trying to say. The direct cause of their friendship was that Slade acted morally while Will broke regs. The man whose orders Slade disobeyed is named Sampson, remember that, it’ll become important later.

The manner in which they met reflects their future relationship, which is to say that when Will stopped Slade from getting beat up it established that they would trade off helping each other.

The beginning may have showed how they met but let’s move onto how they became friends.

Establishing of the friendship

There early friendship seems to be heavily based on trading life debts/ getting people out of fights.

As mentioned above, They met because Will won a fight for Slade, but Will got another win after Samson, still upset over Slade disobeying him, sent a young Slade on a suicide mission. However the universe is a dick and the mission was a success however Slade was caught in an explosion.

This time Will broke ranks and saved Slade, something that Sampson never forgot and as Will says next he faced the wrath of General Sampson.

But rather than that, we need to take a detour first.

My classmate who is in the army, and from what I’ve witnessed for my self in the little time that I’ve served is that once you make a friend in the military, you’re friends for life. You don’t need to keep in contact, but once you see each other again, no matter how long you’ve been apart, its like you were never away.

Which is pretty clearly what happened here.

Will was then Slade’s best man, and so far as cannon tells, they were never separated again. From best man Will stayed at Slade’s side during the enhancements, and fought the government to see Slade when the tests went south.

Slade repays his life debt

Remember when Wintergreen disobeyed Sampson aka king of sending people on death missions? Well Sampson did it again.

He assigned Will on a job which failed, and resulted in Will being captured and tortured by the vietcong. Sampson knew that Will’s heart would have failed and he wouldn’t have survived his captivity.

Slade was not stationed with Will during this mission, rather he found out that Will had been captured a week after Joey was born. At this point, Slade was stationed as a desk jockey in the Army. After he got his enchantments Slade’s powers fluctuated between super strength and being paralyzed. The army declared his unfit to serve in action and this jaded Slade towards them so that when his powers stabilized, he hid it from them knowing that if he told them, and work he was wouldn’t have been offered in sincerity. For someone like Slade, that would have been hell. Anyway, that’s why he wasn’t stationed with Wintergreen.

Slade showed up anyway and saved Will in the garish outfit. An amusing look at Deathstroke's proto suit.

Look not that this matters or is relevant but this whole scene is part of why I think that Rebirth’s story is just plainly bad. Obligatory in my opinion disclaimer. When they meet in rebirth Slade and Will don’t know each other, there's no connection. Unlike DS classic where they start their relationship off with Wintergreen (who one could argue is the weaker in the relationship normally) is in the position of power. It establishes that Slade started his career out as the student and as a flawed human thus perversely mirroring his relationships with other character. Honestly I could make a whole post on just this but I wanted to add it.

Plus Slade’s proto suit in rebirth is bland and uninspired. It totally lacks personality, yeah it “looks better” but I never thought that this suit was meant to look good, it looks like he made it to scare the living shit out of people like a jungle god or someshit. Okay mini rant over.

Remember Sampson? Yeah I’ve mentioned him a few times. Anyway, after Slade saved Will Sampson essentially forced Slade into retirement.

Forced out of a commission that he EARNED for being a damn amazing soldier, not viz blackmail. F*ck you very much Priest!

Moving forward

Slade needs both someone to love and someone to love him (one of the only things Priest and I agree on) After Addie shot Slade, Will took her place.

There really isn’t all that much more to talk about without rehashing almost the entirety of the 90’s run.

Let’s review

Slade and Will became friends and stayed friends due to a “horse’s ass of a soldier” named Sampson, would continue being best of friends through tragedy and at least one divorce (Not counting Will’s vaguely mentioned ones which would bring the score up to a shared five)

So their best friends, but just how loyal are they?

Short, boring answer? Extremely.

Longer, more fun answer? Let’s look at a few of my favorite examples.

This is from the Sins of the Father arc from the first run (an arc that I can’t recommend enough by the way.) Wherein the sins committed by Will’s father comes back to haunt him. Slade and Will “commandeer” a plane, and in the process Will almost gets cut in half by the plane’s wing before Slade saves him.

All taken from issue 50 of the original run, (Part of the crime boss crossover arc I think.) Slade is going on what looked like a death mission, and he laments not having Wintergreen besides him. Que Will showing up, and for the first time in (I’m pretty sure at least) the whole arc, Slade smiles.

I could use these images as being proof enough alone, but I though I’d add the others as well.

“What are you talking about? Will’s just sitting there.”

Yeah, its plain and kinda boring, but the context is that Will is sitting there outside the operating room just waiting for Slade to get out after he was in an explosion. I don’t know why, but this just hits me in the feels for some reason. He doesn’t say anything to Steel, but its like he’s saying where else would I be? Slade was with Will when he was in hospital in Germany, and even set up a hospital at his house so that Will could recover from injuries at home. Where else would Will be when Slade is hurt. He said it best- they’ve been with each other countless times at deaths door, they’ve been each others everything for over 25 years.

#but dc still won't let them get together #talk about natural build up #deathstroke #Slade Wilson #william wintergreen #MarvStroke #Winton #sladebilly

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bookworm-2692 · 3 years

Note

For the ZE Ask Game: 1b, 1e, 2a, 3d, 5e, 5f and 5n!

Thank you for sending the asks! I love talking about Zero Escape so thank you for enabling me :D

Questions from here

1b: Favourite character design?

Okay, you know how hard it is for me to pick favourite characters because they’re all wonderful and that’s why you went with this question haha. Hmm. There are so many good designs (especially with the colour coding!!!). I prefer the designs in the first two games, since they’re really bright and colourful, and the third game is darker and dingier. I like that each character has a main colour that stands out and doesn’t really belong to anyone else (except for Dio and K who both have the red and gold aesthetics, but that’s valid because red and gold is a brilliant aesthetic). I think in 999, my favourite is actually Junpei’s - I love the blue colour of his vest, and the blue vest and red shirt just. Work super well together. It’s a fashion disaster but it’s also an aesthetic I vibe with so. (also love the red blue colour coding with Junpei specifically so). In VLR, much as I loathe him, I really like Dio’s design. The top hat and the braids and the red and gold work really well together and it’s fun. Dio is super frustrating though, but his design slaps!

1e: Favourite scene?

Oooo tricky. There’s so many good moments. I think I have to go with the classic though - the moment in 999 True End where Junpei gets the safe end code, and the narration goes “How did Junpei know? He knew because I knew”. It’s so chilling and also so satisfying to see everything suddenly click. I love it, and I love watching people experiencing that for the first time. It’s like. The best part of the game, I reckon.

2a: Least favourite character?

Okay I’m trying to not immediately say Delta but like.... Delta. I think he had a super interesting concept, but the way it was executed made it so much worse. I hated that they just.... hid him from view so then the twist was that this character you didn’t even know existed was Zero? It just felt cheap. Also ~complex motives~ got really annoying - I would have much preferred it if he had said “yeah I’m only doing this to ensure my birth (and the birth of my sister). soz lmao”. Because that motive feels more real? Rather than just adding a whole random “religious fanatic” in a vague sort of way. I do like the concept of him and Phi being twins and being separated in such a way that they’re very different ages now, but again the execution of Sigma and Diana’s romance was like. Not done well.

So yeah, Delta is my least favourite because he doesn’t significantly effect the plot, barely exists, and when he is present his motives don’t make sense and his abilities are not foreshadowed at all (morphogenetic fields in 999 were good, the entire game was spent explaining the concept. Mind Hack? Right outta left field and also if we’re trying to make it work based on how morphogenetic field theory was explained in 999, the “reading minds” part of it is “extremely strong receiver”, and the “forcing people to do actions” part of it is “extremely strong transmitter”, so he should have one of the abilities but not both. And if he is a really strong transmitter.... he’s gotta mime out the action in order to write it into the fields to encourage others to follow! And I reckon natural transmitters, who are worse at receiving, are naturally slightly resistant to this, natural receivers are more vulnerable to this, and normal people somewhere in between. But yes, if Delta is gonna Mind Hacc Eric, then we should see him in the corner miming holding a gun, pointing, and firing!! Bleugh!

Wow that turned into a bit of a rant. Whoops?

3d: Rank the endings

I have been given the choice to either rank the true ends across the three games, or all the endings within a particular game. I am so bad at choices ugh.

Anyway, the true ends:

999 - it really tied everything together and explained everything. The sequence in the incinerator, seeing 12 year old Akane and 21 year old Junpei talking to each other, Junpei saving young Akane, Clover’s absolute joy at finding out Light is alive, the “he knew because I knew” thing that I mentioned above, just everything. It was a self contained story, so everything was addressed and it was good.

VLR - this is more second by default, since I love 999′s true end and hate ZTD’s true end. But overall, this is fairly solid, and I like the concept of them doing this in 2074 to change an outcome in 2028, but it loses points because it relies on ZTD to “complete” it

ZTD - I hate this true end. The game has very enjoyable moments, but unfortunately the true end amounts to “oh let’s just... SHIFT to a timeline where we all survive” and that’s it? Which just feels sort of pointless tbh. And is so unsatisfactory

Within 999, I feel all six five endings are extremely solid, and all have a part to play an a story to tell. Knife End may be the most unsatisfactory, but it’s still okay. True, Safe, and Sub Ends are the ends with credits, and they’re all full of great dialogue and story. Axe End is also great, and I love the way you get to see the other side of Clover (and I really like the art of Clover holding an axe, I actually drew it on Saturday (when I started writing these answers, but it’s Wednesday now because I’ve been busy) for a friend’s birthday, which is technically my first ZE fanart and I’ll post it here at. Some point. Knife end is a bit quick, but honestly that’s okay? Especially when considering how many bad ends the other two games have that aren’t even named. Coffin End was my first end, and I wasn’t expecting the “to be continued” so I basically just collapsed and lay face down on the ground for a fair bit, but again given how many plot locks the other games have, coffin end is chill. So 999 has the most solid endings overall.

Within VLR, there are nine named endings, one for each character, and 13 ish unnamed bad ends. The unnamed bad ends are all like.... basically as soon as you make the decision you die or whatever, they don’t continue onwards like they do for Axe End etc in 999. I like that the named endings are designed for you to learn about each character, even though some of them are kinda weak. Like Quark’s ending, we didn’t really learn about him, and most of what we learnt about him was from Tenmyouji’s ending. I agree with what you said, Finch, about how it would have been nice to get some more Quark content/bonding/something, after he wakes up. Clover’s ending was also pretty disappointing, since she vaguely alluded to 999 and then everyone killed themselves. But there were some really good ones, like Luna’s and K’s and Dio’s (very fun that Phi was about to smash his head with a rock even if betraying Luna to get to that point is painful). Actually I really like the whole murder mystery aspect of everything behind the Magenta door.

Within ZTD, I do appreciate that the endings all served their purposes, but I disliked the way there were sometimes multiple endings in the same timeline, while other timelines... had none. It just was a bit all over the shop. Most of the endings were informative for the characters, but the true end sucks.

5e: Rant about something you liked from the games

I adore all the red/blue symbolism in the games, especially in 999. The way every time the morphogenetic field is described, the transmitters are red people and the receivers are blue people. And then when you learn who the espers are, you can see how the colours align. Clover is a transmitter, and her colour scheme is a lot of dark pink, close to red, while Light, a receiver, has lots of blue in his design. Junpei and Akane can both transmit and receive (with each other), and this is shown by Junpei wearing both red and blue, and Akane wearing purple, a mix of red and blue. It’s really neat. Also, Junpei is new to the morphogenetic fields, so his blue and red is still separate, but Akane is so entwined within them, and uses them so easily, that her blue and red have mixed to become purple.

In VLR, Clover is still pink, and Junpei still has blue (even though he’s lost the red, but that could show he’s lost connection to Akane and now has no one to transmit to, although I think it’s hilarious if he was still unintentionally transmitting to Akane over the years, and that’s how she kept tabs on him and found him again for VLR.

In ZTD, Diana is red and Sigma is blue. I actually headcanon Diana as a receiver and Sigma as a transmitter (as in, he transmitted his memories to himself across timelines rather than a natural receiver ability), so I like that in ZTD they have opposite colours/each other’s colours. Phi is blue in both games and still a receiver imo.

So the colour symbolism is obviously strongest in 999, but I really like it.

5f: Rant about something you disliked from the games

In VLR, Clover says that stronger espers absorb the powers of weaker espers, and that’s why she can’t contact her brother. I hate this “fact” actually, because it directly contradicts the way the morphogenetic fields work in 999 and ZTD, and also in VLR itself. In 999, we have nine sets of esper siblings during the First Nonary Game, and since they all survived, we know that their esper powers must have worked correctly.... which means we can’t have had one Super Esper absorbing all the powers. The true end of ZTD has the powers of all the espers working together to create a resonant effect so that even Eric and Mira, non espers, can SHIFT. I also dislike SHIFTing (a rant for another day), but the idea of multiple espers in a vicinity resonating/boosting everyone’s powers makes way more sense than.... one person absorbing everyone else’s powers.

And even within VLR.... Tenmyouji does the ally/betray swapsies thing with Sigma and Phi, which means he is also remembering another timeline.... which means his powers are still working and not being absorbed by Phi and Sigma. Also.... both Phi and Sigma are using their powers and SHIFTing everywhere. Why doesn’t one of them absorb the other’s powers? Also also, we learn in the True End that Akane was in K’s armour the entire time during the timeline where Sigma and Phi most use their powers for all the bomb passwords and locations etc. You cannot try to tell me that Akane isn’t the strongest esper, ever. She simply is. If absorbing was true, then we would literally never see anyone else use their powers, because Akane is always there (FNG, 999, VLR, ZTD) and would have to be doing all the absorbing. Gah.

So I reckon, even though Clover said that, that she was simply wrong. That was the current theory SOIS had, but.... they don’t have to be right.

In any case, there are other reasons why Clover might not have been able to contact Light in VLR. The first is simply that he is dead. Another is the idea that minds linked by the morphogenetic fields have a sort of... shape. That fits perfectly with those they are esper partners with. And as the espers grow, so do their mind shapes. Clover was frozen on the 22nd of December 2028, and awoke on the 25th of January 2074. Her mind shape was not able to evolve and grow, so it is preserved. Light however has been living those 45 years, which means that’s been a lot of time for his mind shape to grow and change. Clover can’t find Light’s mind in the morphogenetic field, since it no longer looks the same, and their shapes no longer fit together. This is my personal headcanon, and it means that when Clover finds him, their minds can get used to each other again and their shapes can align, and they can be linked again.

5n: Do you have any fanart/fanfic/fangame recommendations?

Boy, do I ever? The First Nonary Game by @airdeari . What it says on the tin, folks! Airdeari has named all nine pairs of siblings, and created unique sibling relationships and unique experiences with the morphogenetic field for all of them, and woven a beautiful story together, and it’s just wonderful. It’s my favourite fic ever, to the point where I literally bound it and it now exists as a physical book in my life. Like, I cannot recommend this fic enough, it is the best.

AO3 Summary: A tale of nine children aboard a sinking ship, and the unbelievable story of how they survived.

#zero escape #999 spoilers #vlr spoilers #ztd spoilers

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aziraphales-library · 5 years

Note

Hey!!! I’m kinda new, and I’d like to know if you can recommend me some good GO fics? My only request it’s that they should mostly be Teen Up or Gen s fics... and maybe some good AUs (I’m in love with those)

Okay, here we go!! I went a little all out on this post because it’s more about personal preference, but I still stand by it :D

An Angel who did not so much Fall In Love as Settle Into It Gradually by TheLadyZephyr - 7.5k - Rated T

Crowley was standing in the middle of the room, hands in his pockets, looking a little lost. Aziraphale eyed the distance between them. Five steps. Five steps, and six thousand years, and a battlefield spanning an eternity.

The story of the little moments over the millennia that shape an angel’s regard for a demon, and the way he slowly, with great reluctance but inevitable surety, falls in love.

I simply adore this fic. It’s one of those fics that follows them through the ages and its just done so well. I don’t even know what else to say, just that you should go read it, and the fanart is also gorgeous!

Something So Magic by apliddell - 3.9k - Rated G

Crowley gets stuck in his serpent form, and Aziraphale tries his best to help.

This fic is simple, yet adorable, and I cannot get enough of it.

How Much To Give, How Much To Take by thechemicalgirl - 3k - Rated G

“It’s like…’ he paused, trying to calm down. ‘It’s like after I came back from Heaven and we switched our bodies back, something has happened. I can’t use my power anymore, not even to start the Bentley.”

Crowley loses his demonic abilities and Aziraphale tries to help him cope with it, but things get much more complicated than that.

Angsty, but also soft, and just a great execution of a favourite premise.

In Peace I Will Both Lie Down and Sleep by fizzybiscuits - 5.6k - Rated G

Aziraphale starts having nightmares. For some reason, he doesn’t talk to Crowley about this right away.

Title is from Psalms 4:8. “In peace I will both lie down and sleep; for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety.”

This fic just has everything. It’s a stellar example of an established relationship fic and is cavity-inducingly fluffy.

Be All My Sins Remembered by CloversDreams - 43.4k - Rated T

“The trial,” Beelzebub continued loudly, “will consist of seven tests.”

“Seven…” Aziraphale muttered under his breath. He had a bad feeling about this and it showed. He twiddled his thumbs nervously as he waited for more details.

Crowley scrunched his face and shook his head. “Oh you don’t mean–”

“Correct. The Sins have been charged with the task,” Beelzebub interjected.

“Crap.” Crowley groaned. He slapped his hands onto his face and dragged them downward slowly. This was just what they didn’t need.

Gabriel nodded. He had a rather unpleasant grin on his face as he said, “Don’t know much about them, myself, but they can be a pretty gnarly group of high-class demons from what I’ve heard. On par with the archangels back home. Wouldn’t want to… what’s that delightful human phrase? Oh, right. Wouldn’t want to cock this up.”

Listen, in my opinion, this fic is massively underrated. I unintentionally binged it all in one go because it was so gripping. The angst in some chapters had me practically screaming, and the whole idea is a brilliant take on the seven deadly sins. The pining is magnificent, and I live for the Husbands drama.

Let Sleeping Snakes Lie by Blue_Sparkle - 2.6k - Rated G

Aziraphale confesses his love for Crowley when he can contain it no longer. Oh, not to the demon himself of course. To a sleeping snake.

Another fic featuring Snake!Crowley, this one is magnificently soft, and I adore the scene in Stardust it’s inspired by. Just can’t stop coming back to read, 10/10 recommend!

Serpent of Eden, Original Tempter by noodlefrog - 33.4k - Rated T

During Crowley’s trial, the agents of Hell present evidence that the demon has been fraternizing with the enemy. Careful to protect Crowley’s pride (and his own concealed feelings), Aziraphale turns on the saunter and leans into his friend’s reputation as a tempter to spin their relationship into something that looks more demonic than lunch dates and feeding the ducks.

This fic combines Pining, Misunderstandings, and a fantastic ‘what if?’ for the execution scenes, and I am here for it. The Original Characters are written fantastically well, and I loved the bonus chapter!

What They Say About Assumptions by DragonGirl - 7.9k - Rated T

While it’s true that God bestowed upon the angels the divine power to sense love of all kinds, that does not mean they were given the ability to sense exactly who or what that love is directed at. A minor design flaw that hasn’t been much of an issue. Until now.

Or:

Aziraphale has known that Crowley loved someone since the beginning. He’s also spent most of that time believing that someone was a demon.

Aziraphale’s obliviousness in this fic was so ridiculous it felt plausible. It was hilarious but also heartwarming, and has one of my fave love confessions. It was angsty as hell in the best way, and I just implore that you read it!

Futile Devices by ticketybye - 3.2k - Rated G

Crowley pretends to sleep. Aziraphale talks.

Just adorable. Cavity inducing fluff and love confessions are my favourite things and god does this deliver on that.

Foolish Principality by seashadows and WikdSushi - 6.6k - Rated M

Upon moving into a South Downs cottage, Crowley gets left alone while Aziraphale rushes to help the new proprietors of his bookshop. Thanks to a miracle gone wrong, Crowley discovers Aziraphale's greatest material secret, and a few things neither of them could ever fully face.

Is rated M but in my opinion there’s nothing too bad in here, though you should judge for yourself. The poetry is beautiful, horrifying masterpieces, and it is honestly fantastically funny and sweet.

——

Y’all know by now that I adore anything by Arinia, but this fic is one of my faves:

Just This Once by Arinia - 2.7k - Rated T

An idea came, slowly at first, before filling up his heart, setting every nerve alight. It might be another decade, another century even, before he saw Crowley again. No one had come to rescue him from Above. No one had chastised Crowley for wasting a miracle from Below. Perhaps, just this once…

The streets of Paris are soaked with blood, and Aziraphale realizes just how much he owes Crowley for saving his life.

It’s freaking adorable, the kissing is fantastic, and I have a secret love of the French Revolution that made me love the fic all the more. Read it, I beg you.

——

As for AUs, I don’t read loads, but I do have some faves!

Neighborly Affection by Thestarlitrose - 4.6k - Rated T - Human AU

Anthony J Crowley was four years old the first time he met the tiny Ezra A Fell; he wasn’t impressed.

He was forty-six when he found him again in a bookshop in Soho.

The Childhood Friends, Flower Shop, Christmas, Friends to Lovers fic nobody asked for in the middle of October.

This fic is a complete tangle of tropes, and it’s also incredibly sweet. Perfect for the fast approaching holiday season!

a book elegantly bound by AwkwardPotatoChild - 6.5k - Rated G - Library AU

Two idiots. One book series.

or alternatively, Aziraphale and Crowley are united over their common love of books and the scheming of one Miss Anathema Device

This fic manages to be both very funny and incredibly endearing at the same time. The book names were hilarious, and I adored Anathema’s matchmaking.

A Jaunt Or Two by sonicsora - 3.1k - Rated T - Human AU

They meet by happenstance twice over, only to end up quite woven into one anothers lives. It’s all quite accidental, but sticks.

Crowley realizes a bit belated he’s quite attached to this man who freely uses the word jaunt and wears cream-colored suits.

This fic is just adorable. It’s sweet, fluffy, and exactly my kind of thing. Also Gabriel’s a dick in the comedic way, which is fun to see.

Restoration by arealshitwizard (gaiusgallus) - 2.6k - Rated G - Human AU

Ok I had this idea in my head and it wouldn’t go away so here is Aziraphale as a painting restorer and Crowley as a flash stock broker… There’s just one chapter sorry for my sins

This is a really unique fic (I know I keep saying that, but it’s true!), and featured such fun interpretations of their characters!

——-

I’m aware that 90% of this list is very specific to my preferences, and that it got a little out of hand, but I hope y’all enjoy the recs anyway! XD

Does the blog have any favourites they’d like to share?

~ Mod B

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warriorsredux · 4 years

Text

RE: Feedback for the Redux.

(I wanted to give you really in-depth feedback. Unfortunately, it ended up being way longer than I anticipated. I figured it would be easier to send this as a submission rather than breaking it up into a million smaller asks. I hope that’s all right!)

Note: I put this under a readmore to save space, but I have read it all and thoroughly agree with it. Thank you so much for the feedback, man!

Before I get into the nitty-gritty, I want to briefly talk about my personal relationship with Warriors - not because I want to talk about myself necessarily, but because I want to provide some relevant context. You see, I was first introduced to these books in 2004, about when I was nine years old. You could argue, in some ways, that these books defined a large part of my childhood, and were extremely influential into my teenage years and early adulthood. When I wasn’t fantasizing about colonies of talking feral cats, I was gleefully writing fanfics and roleplaying online. Those were my first tentative forays into writing, and would ultimately set me on the path to refine and hone those skills in the years to come. I was obsessed with the mythology and lore of this world, with the sprawling cast of characters, with the steady publication of new entries into the series.

Now, kids tend to not have the best critical thinking skills. Which is why it took until my late teenage years to realize that my cherished books were really, really not that great. The mythology and lore that I’d praised were starved of any creativity, steeped in the cliches of the fantasy genre, and prone to collapsing under their own weight when subjected to even the smallest amount of scrutiny. The characters that I adored? They were blighted with similar cliches, lacking in any sort of growth or development or depth; sustained only by archetypes and whatever retcons the authors thought would sell the most books, either through hype, drama, or fanservice. Exacerbating all of this was the publisher’s insistence on milking the franchise for whatever profit nostalgia could still yield. They weren’t writing more books because they had new, interesting ideas they wanted to explore - they did it because this series was (and still is) fucking lucrative. As I thought about these things more critically, and became more informed on social issues, it became impossible to unsee the uglier aspects of the franchise - the ableism, the queerbaiting and lack of representation, the depiction of minors and adults (Dustpelt and Ferncloud, Thistleclaw and Spottedleaf) having romantic or sexual relationships, the blind nationalism and eugenics/persecution of minorities (non-Clanborn cats) and characters of mixed descent (half-Clan cats). People far more informed and far more eloquent than myself have discussed those issues in-depth elsewhere, but suffice to say, I was understandably upset by these things. No amount of nostalgia could blind me to those flaws.

And yet, for some reason, I never really stopped loving Warriors. Or put more accurately - I never stopped loving the potential of Warriors. That was the thing that I kept coming back to. The wasted potential of a series depicting the lives of feral cats, and their brutal struggle to survive in the wilderness, all the while deeply immersed in their own complex societies and cultures. It became painfully clear to me that the thing I loved about Warriors was the sandbox nature of the franchise, and all the ways fans were able to explore that untapped potential. With that realization now achieved, Warriors slipped into the back of my mind, accruing cobwebs as the years passed. Occasionally those dormant thoughts stirred whenever I saw a piece of fanart on my dashboard, or I passed a new release while browsing the local Barnes & Noble. Sometimes I even entertained the fleeting thought of writing AU fics again. But by and large, Warriors had been retired from my thoughts.

And then, in 2017, I found the Redux.

While writing this segment I had several false starts, in no small part because I didn’t know what to talk about first. It was like someone had gone through my thoughts with a steel-toothed comb, and took every disappointment, every what if, and turned it into a reality. Holy shit, look at this blog! Look at the meta commentary! Look at all of the worldbuilding! I could clearly see just how much passion and attention to detail was put into developing the plot and the characters. How many hundreds of hours went into correcting the broken genetics of the canon characters. Suddenly, the Clans had culture - real, living, breathing culture! There was a pantheon of deities and demigods. A deliberate intention behind the naming tradition beyond slapping two words together because they sounded pretty or made for a trite pun. This. This was the story Warriors should have been. This lone blog managed to conceive an original lore for the Clans, while further developing the canon plots beyond their base elements. What three authors failed to do, one person achieved on their own.

You made forgettable characters interesting. And you made interesting characters unforgettable.

I lived for every scrap of content you created - the asks, the deconstructions, the amendment posts, the art, even the fucking shitposts (because they were just genuinely wholesome and funny). The Redux wasn’t just a source of entertainment, either - it introduced me to the idea of writing an AU that was sustained by meta-analysis, and grounded in critical reception of the series’ flaws (both technical and social). Your work eventually inspired me to create my own Redux-style worldbuilding/AU blog for a series that has similar issues to canon Warriors.

The Redux deserves all the praise it gets, and you should be extremely proud of what you’ve accomplished. Even if the Third Arc wasn’t finished or the Fourth started, it was still a helluva ride, one that I’m so glad I got to participate in.

But, of course, you asked for feedback, so I can’t spend the entirety of this post throwing roses at your feet. So, onto the constructive feedback.

I think a lot of my thoughts are going to echo what other people have previously said, but for me, the biggest setbacks in the Redux were the following:

[1] Pacing. This is going to sound weird, but this isn’t a criticism of the Redux’s length. Rather, it’s more about how that time was spent. While I really like how you adjusted aspects of the Redux’s plot in order to still tangentially align with the books’, it sometimes felt like the chapters were there just to connect points A and B. I knew this was a retelling of the original series, so I already had a vague idea of what the general storybeats would be. What appealed to me was how the story would get to those points. Let me give you an example: in Arc 1, we’re told in chapter 10 that Murkpelt is roaming the territories, and poses a threat to the Clans. Immediately in chapter 11 we’re taken to the scene where Firepaw finds her while escorting Spottedleaf. We’re told about ThunderClan’s efforts to track her prior, and about the looming tension in the wake of this invisible threat. But that’s the thing - we’re told that by the narration in just a paragraph or two. We’re not shown what that looks like. The setup is supposed to be everyone being on edge, but Bluestar’s lounging by the stump when the scene begins. It’s a little dissonant, and it has the unfortunate problem of contradicting the narration. It would’ve been so cool to see a chapter or two where Firepaw’s still trying to immerse himself into Clan life, and his questions are met with terse answers or impatience. Undercut his (and the reader’s) learning with other characters being brusque with him, or short-tempered, or something. And then that could lead into Greypaw or Ravenpaw consoling him and explaining why the situation is so serious. Then Firepaw could ask something like, “Have there ever been instances like this before with rogues?” Which could organically lead to a conversation where Greypaw or Ravenpaw bring up relevant lore/worldbuilding. It’s little stuff like that which would’ve helped with immersion and pacing. I think it would have balanced the two out, by providing pseudo-downtime where the audience experiences the world as the characters do. (If that makes sense.) Or, to provide another example: we never get to see Tres Idiots mentoring Snowpaw. In chapters 5 and 6 of Arc 3, we see Raventhroat struggling to develop a signing system he can use with his apprentice; and then, after a few chapters he’s perfectly narrating the Bright-Eyed Crow to Snowpaw. I think that showing us scenes where the two were actually working out the kinks would have done more to develop Raventhroat’s character arc. He went from being a meek, timid apprentice to an eloquent warrior, and him becoming a mentor is supposed to be a definite part of that journey. It would’ve have been so cool to have plot-relevant scenes broken up by smaller ones where we watch Raventhroat gain confidence through each small success he makes with his apprentice. I’m not sure if I’m conveying exactly what I want to say, but I guess the TL;DR would be something like - I would’ve gladly welcomed either more chapters, or longer ones, if it meant we got more scenes like this.

[2] Utilization of the worldbuilding. You mentioned this already in response to another ask, but if you could go back and change anything, it would be incorporating more lore/adhering the Redux to its lore more strongly. Your worldbuilding is perhaps the strongest part of the Redux by far. You gave us a conlang, traditions, folk stories, Clan stereotypes - so much fascinating material - but it feels like its integration was based solely on whether or not it was relevant to the plot at hand. Unless there was a reason why it was brought up, then we’d never get to see a ThunderClan cat freaking out near a ShadowClan seer and refusing to approach them at a Gathering. Or listen to Mistfoot share a poem with Greystripe and Fireheart (after being goaded into it by Silverstream). Or watch as Redtail politely interrupts the elders and asks for their opinion on an important matter. Or listen to the Clan getting together after a loved one dies and share stories about their life. Or watch as Sandpaw/Dustpaw use their age and seniority over Firepaw to terrorize him with stories of Yrrun and Terror. On one hand, I absolutely understand why a lot of lore was relegated exclusively to the Amendment section - it’s important to strike a balance between what’s interesting versus what’s relevant. You don’t wanna just throw worldbuilding trivia at the audience apropos of nothing. On the other hand, I really wish I’d seen a much larger integration of your worldbuilding into the story, because it’s so fascinating and so god damn good.

[3] Utilization of the characters. One of the things you tweaked, that I absolutely loved, was choosing to introduce Silverpaw in Arc 1 at a Gathering. Not only does it create a realistic basis for her friendship with Tres Idiots, but it fixes the canon’s issue of her saving Greystripe out of nowhere and then developing a relationship on that alone. That was fucking great! Same thing with Rainpath - it was so awesome for Fireheart to get a friend in another Clan (ShadowClan, of all Clans). It broke the mold, and their interactions were just delightful. But outside of those examples, sometimes it kinda felt like the side characters didn’t really exist? I remember an old piece of writing advice, but I can’t recall who it’s attributed to: “Treat your side characters like they think they’re the main characters.” Because they absolutely are. I might be some passing stranger in another person’s life, barely a blip on their radar, but I have my own vibrant story. Everyone does. In the Redux, it sometimes felt like minor or side characters weren’t living their own lives outside of their interactions with Fireheart and his friends. Mousefur’s the most fluent speaker of Fang in ThunderClan? Cool. How did she learn that skill? Who taught her? Does she have a friend in WindClan who’s been teaching her new words at Gatherings, or whenever they happen to cross paths while on border patrols near Four Trees? Not only is that character trivia interesting, but it could provide foreshadowing/become relevant later on. When the Clans meet to discuss how to deal with the dogs in Arc 3, perhaps someone suggests having their most fluent Fang speakers act as interpreters/diplomats, and try to broker some sort of peace/understanding with the dogs. Things like that. Basically, it would’ve been nice if Fireheart’s life intersected more with the goings-on of his Clanmates, or if his own goals/agenda were sometimes inconvenienced by the goals/agenda of others.

I think those are my major criticisms. More integration of lore, a slower/steadier pace that accommodates showing over telling, and finding ways to have the personal lives of minor characters interact with the story. Maybe adding in some additional subplots that are congruent with the main plots, and occur simultaneously, in order to keep chapters busy. That sort of thing. I hope what I provided wasn’t overwhelming in any way, and ends up being useful for either the Redux or any of your other writing projects.

As an aside, thank you. For creating this humble niche community within an even larger fandom. For asking for feedback from your readers. For being someone who makes mistakes, but eventually endeavors to learn from them, and ultimately, become a better person. I know this sounds kinda sappy, but I really do mean it. <3

(For the record I wrote this at like five in the morning, so if there are any grammatical errors I’ll be kicking myself in the ass for those.)

#silvokrent #submission #i speak #kind of #textwall #readmore

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trashyswitch · 4 years

Text

Can a Skeleton be Ticklish?

Arial was spending time with the Sanders sides, and reading something on her tickle fanfic page. But Arial didn't realize until it was too late, that Roman was reading her phone and now knew her secret. But...Perhaps it might've been for the better?

This prompt was sent in by @smileheart110, and features their Undertale OC, Arial. I hope you enjoy the fanfic! And if I got anything about your OC wrong, feel free to let me know in the comment or in DM's. Thanks!

This work features a shoutout to @fluffymary! I'm a HUGE fan of your fanart!

Arial was visiting the sides for a little while today. She had eaten a really warm soup and sandwich lunch meal with Patton and some of the others, and was now just hanging out in the living room with Patton and Roman. Roman was coloring in a coloring book on her left, while Patton was playing angry birds on his own phone.

What was Arial doing?

Well...She was looking at fanart on Tumblr that was made by @fluffymary! There were tons of really good fanarts of the Sanders Sides, coincidentally. Looking at the pictures were making her a little flustered, but it depended on what spots the fanart focused on. Why she was looking at fanart instead of just declaring a tickle war in the middle of the living room?

Easy: Too embarrassing. As much as she’d love to, something told her a few of the sides wouldn’t be quite as amused with her childish endeavors. Specifically...Logan.

Arial soon moved on and looked down a list of lee questions. It didn’t take long for her face to flush a light magenta color. Whoops...Guess she didn’t really think this through...Now her face is all flushed and they’re all gonna notice because it’s magenta contrasting with her snow white skull. What’s she gonna say if they notice and bring something up?

“Hey Arial! Look!” Patton said to her, pointing to his phone. Arial just about jumped 5 feet, but managed to keep her composure while she looked at Patton. The phone was showing her a video of a puppy that was trying to learn to howl, but was doing a lot more baby babbles than actual howls. Arial burst out laughing and allowed her face to flush with color again. This was worth being flustered at!

“Awwww! Babbling pup!” Arial reacted.

“I know!” Patton reacted before pulling his phone away.

Arial smiled and thought of the puppy for a little longer, before focusing back on the reblogged questions. She had started to determine which numbers to answer, when she froze and looked to her right side. Roman had stopped coloring in his book and was now reading her phone!

Uh oh…

“Uuuuuh…” was all Arial could get out of her mouth.

“Can I see the phone?” Roman asked.

Arial widened her eyes and looked at him with nervous eyes. She looked down at her phone, before slowly looking back at the man who had caught her in the act. Should she give him the phone to lessen suspicion? Or should she tell him no so that she doesn’t get any more embarrassed than she already is?

Finally, Arial handed him her phone. Roman started reading the questions and picked the second one. “Would you rather be tickled on your worst spot for 5 minutes? Or on 5 less ticklish spots for 1 minute?” Roman asked out of nowhere.

Arial’s eyes widened to the size of dinner plates. The other sides had looked up from their entertainment to listen to the question and hear the answer. Arial felt like she wanted to sink into the void hidden under her seat and hide in space forever. Did he just seriously ask her that?

Not fully in control of her actions, Arial slowly hid her feet under the couch. “Uuuuuuh…” Arial muttered.

“Worst spot for 5 minutes, or 5 not as bad spots for 1 minute?” Roman repeated.

“5 spots for one minute.” Arial got out quick.

“Alright. Would you rather see someone else get tickled? Or have someone watch you get tickled?” Roman asked, still reading off her phone.

Arial grabbed her hair and hid her face behind her newfound hair curtains. “See someone else get tickled.”

Roman chuckled. “Would you rather be tickled with tools? Or just fingers?” Roman asked with a smirk. Arial squeaked like a mouse and sunk deeper into her seat. To make matters worse, Roman had summoned a hairbrush, a toothbrush AND a feather! All in one hand! The moment she looked up and saw THAT freaking bundle, Arial shrieked and fell into Patton’s side.

Patton giggled. “Uh oh! Is Arial flustered?” Patton teased. “Because I hate to break it to you…” Patton leaned in really close to her ear hole, “...but you just bumped into the biggest tickle monster in the house.” Patton whispered.

“Hey! I heard that! I thought I was the ultimate tickle monster?!” Roman protested.

“I mean...You are a close second…” Patton let him know. “You’re my assistant!” Patton explained.

Arial didn’t know how much more of this she could take. “Are you ticklish by any chance?” Patton asked.

“Can skeletons even be ticklish without nerves?” Virgil asked.

“Actually, bones have nerves hidden within the blood vessels that bring blood through the bones. Not only that, but bones can also contain nerve endings within the bone marrow. So anatomically, Arial could be ticklish.” Logan piped up.

Arial gulped and looked towards Logan. Logan just sent her a wink, which sent chills down her spine. Then, she looked at Roman. But Roman, being the hidden devil he was, booped Arial on the nose hole with the feather. Arial slapped the feather out of his hand. “Knock it off!” Arial ordered, growing slightly annoyed.

Suddenly, Patton wrapped his arms around her. “Uh oh! Looks like someone is getting a little impatient! Could I at least hear a pleeeeaaaase?” Patton asked with an innocent voice.

Arial whined. Did she seriously have to say please in order to get tickles from them? “I wanna hear a please first…” Roman told her.

“You gonna ask? Or you gonna stay quiet?” Patton teased.

Finally, Arial gained a slight bit of courage to say it. “Please?” Arial asked.

“Please...what?” Patton asked.

Arial whined yet again. SERIOUSLY?! “Pleasetickleme?” Arial asked.

“I think I might’ve understood what you said, but...I think I need to hear it again...just to make-”

“PLEEEEAAASE TICKLE ME!” Arial yelled.

Roman widened his eyes. “Oh my…”

Patton chuckled. “I appreciate that you said it, but I didn’t really like HOW you said it.” Patton told her. Arial let out a toddler-like whine. “Can you please ask me again...but with less attitude?” Paton asked.

Arial growled and finally shoved her hands into Patton’s sides. “AriaAAAHAHAHAHA! Nohohow hold on there, Arial!” Patton laughed, unable to stop himself from laughing from the accidental, aggressive tickles.

“You’re frustrating the poor girl, Patton. Let me help:” Roman suggested before skittering his fingers on her ribs. “Besides, I’ve always wondered how ticklish you might be.” Roman added.

Arial let out a squeal and started giggling almost immediately. “Wooooow! Not even holding anything back, huh?” Roman reacted. Logan looked over at Arial and smiled.

“I see you have ticklish ribs!” Logan commented. “Makes sense.”

“But just HOW ticklish are these ribs?” Roman asked before drumming his fingers up and down her ribs.

“NononONONOOOHOHOHOHOHO!” ROHOHOHOMAHAHAHAN!” Arial bursted out laughing.

“Whaaaat?” Roman replied.

“IHIHIHIT TIHIHIHICKLEHEHEHES!” Arial yelled at him.

Logan chuckled and got up. “I will remind you that you were actually asking for this.” Logan added as he walked up to the scene.

“THAHAHAT WAHAHAS UHUHUHUNCAHAHAHALLED FOHOHOR!” Arial protested.

“Uncalled for, you claim?” Logan reacted. “Okay. Let’s play it that way then.” Logan sat down at the end of the couch and grabbed her ankle. “Is thiiiis uncalled for too?” Logan asked as he skittered his fingers on her feet.

Arial let out a loud, high-pitched SCREAM! She wanted to protest against him, but her cackles and quick loss of breath stopped her from even trying to talk! Logan stopped tickling her foot almost immediately. “WOW...That was...very unexpected.” Logan admitted.

“I guess her feet are her death spot!” Roman reacted. “Now, how ticklish are your armpits?” Roman asked rhetorically before lifting her right arm up past her head. Roman didn’t waste a second and had dug into her armpit almost immediately!

“OOOHOHOHO GAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HOHOHOHOW DAHAHAHAHARE!” Arial yelled at him.

“Oh, you don’t think I dare touch the ticklish skeleton’s armpits? I most definitely dare!” Roman replied. “I even dare to ask Logan and Patton to join me!” Roman added.

Logan smiled and winked. “I’d love to help!” Logan replied.

“I’ve been waiting very patiently! Now is my time to SHIIINE!” Patton shouted before kneeling in front of the couch. Patton brought his hand up to her belly and was about to start tickling it. But...the shirt caved right in. Patton widened his eyes and lifted her shirt up a bit. There was indeed no belly to tickle! “...What?” Patton asked.

“IHIHIHI’M AHAHA SKEHEHELETOHOHON! IHIHI DOHOHON’T HAHAHAVE AHA BEHEHELLY!” Arial explained.

Patton frowned and crossed his arms at first. But it didn’t take long for Patton to try going fo her pelvic hollows on either side. Arial squealed and fell into a hysterical laughing fit almost right away! She was swaying her body left and right, yet still couldn’t shake Patton’s hands off her upper hips. “There we go! Tickle tickle tickle tickle tickle, Arial!” Patton teased. “Who’s got such ticklish hips? Remember, no lying! Cause girls with your kind of hips CAN’T lie!” Patton teased.

Roman and Arial both bursted out laughing at that weird comment. “WHAHAHAT DOHOHOES THAHAHAHAT MEHEHEHEAN?!” Arial asked.

Patton giggled. “I was referencing the song ‘Hips Don’t Lie’ by Shakira!” Patton explained.

“Were you calling her Shakira?” Logan asked.

Patton tilted his head. “Did it...sound like I was?” Patton asked.

“It kind of did, yeah.” Logan replied briefly.

“Then yes! I did call you Shakira! You have some nice hips.” Patton said as he started poking the sides of her pelvis again.

Arial’s laughter raised an octave from both the really weird but endearing compliment, and from Patton’s poking. Arial couldn’t stop laughing for the life of her. Two people were attacking her really ticklish upper body!

“Where else should we go? Is your neck ticklish by any chance?” Roman asked before he started skittering his fingers on the neck part of her spine.

Arial curled her neck back and squeaked. “HEHEHEHehehehehey! Ehehehevihihil prihihihince!” Arial protested.

Roman guffawed. “So, I touch your armpits and you’re all like ‘Hehe! That tickles!’. But the moment I even SLIGHTLY tickle you’re like ‘Nuuu! Bad Roman! Evil Roman!’ Why is that?!” Roman reacted.

“Ihihihi dohohohon’t knohohohow.” Arial replied.

“Maybe she just can’t help the words that come out of her mouth!” Patton suggested. “Or maybe...light tickles are harder to handle than intense tickles.” Patton also suggested.

“It might be a bit of both.” Logan concluded. “I mean, how would you feel if someone just started tickling your neck for a while without stopping despite your protests?” Logan asked.

Arial looked up and smiled when she saw Logan tickle the left side of Patton’s neck. “eeEEK! No! NNNNO! Hands! Away!” Patton ordered.

“How about YOU keep your OWN hands away?” Logan suggested as he grabbed Patton’s hands and pinned them above his head with both his hands. With his arms out of the way and bent to give Logan more room to tickle, Logan leaned into his neck and blew a raspberry onto Patton’s neck. “NOOHOHOHOHAHAHAHAHAHA! LOHOHOHOGAHAHAHAN!” Patton shrieked like a child.

“See? You can’t quite think properly when you’re being tickled by someone.” Logan explained. “Buuuut...how about light tickles?” Logan asked as he adjusted his grip. With one hand holding both his arms, Logan started skittering his fingers on Patton’s neck. When it was covered, Logan would move to an exposed neck spot. Logan kept doing this so he could guarantee lots of light tickles for Patton.

“Stahahahap! Whyhyhy mehehehe?! WHYhyhyhy?! Ihihihi thohohought wehehe wehehehere tihihicklihing Ahaharial?” Patton giggled and squeaked.

Logan smiled. “I’m just proving a point.” Logan replied confidently.

By now, Roman had stopped tickling Arial and let her go. Not only that, but Roman even took the time to whisper something in Arial’s ear. With new information in her mind, Arial lifted herself up and started tickling Logan’s hips.

“BAHAHA! ARIAL, NOHOHO!” Logan jumped, collapsing onto the couch.

“You’re right: Arial no. Buuut, Patton YES!” She replied. “Go for it, Pat!” Arial declared to him.

“You got it!” Patton started quickly tickling Logan for revenge. “Can’t test a theory without testing it on yourself!” Patton declared as well.

Logan giggled and started laughing hysterically in less than a minute. Patton chose the really ticklish and juicy spots, which ended up keeping Logan down and stuck in defeat. While Arial only watched the tickle fight from there, Arial did get some information on where to go when tickling Logan. She also eventually found out Patton’s many ticklish spots when he managed to dominate Patton once again!

The day ended up turning into a big tickle fight between her, Roman, Patton, Logan and eventually Virgil. And this all wouldn’t have happened, if Arial didn’t show Roman the embarrassing list of questions on her phone.

Boy! Isn’t embarrassment a blessing sometimes?

#background virgil #ticklefic #lee!arial #switch!patton #ler!roman #switch!logan

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thelastspeecher · 4 years

Text

Spirit Touched - Chapter 6: Refugee

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 AO3

Uhhh I actually updated on AO3 like two weeks ago, I just procrastinated putting it up here on Tumblr for some reason. But here it is. Angst, Zuko doing serious soul searching, and Toph continuing to just be the best Toph she can be. Enjoy.

Again, this fic is inspired by @muffinlance‘s fic Salvage and fanart that @agent-jaselin did of it.

——————————————————————————————

Water sloshed over the rim of the bucket Zuko was carrying. The tribesman Zuko was following stopped to look back at him.

“Nuktuk, if this is too difficult for you, you can go back to your tent and play,” the tribesman said. Zuko scowled. The troops at Chameleon Bay had accepted him with open arms, though they didn’t know his proper age, and as such, tended to talk down to him and refuse to let him help with chores.

“No, I’ve got it,” he insisted. The tribesman shrugged.

“All right, if you say so.” There was a commotion off in the distance. “Huh. I wonder what’s-” Tuluk came running over. “Tuluk, is something going on?”

“Yes. The Chief is handling it, but Nuktuk needs to go back to his tent for now,” Tuluk said.

“What’s happening?” Zuko asked.

“We have a visitor,” Tuluk replied. Zuko frowned.

“What kind of visitor?”

“You’ll find out once things calm down.”

“But-”

“No buts.” Tuluk handed Zuko’s bucket of water to the tribesman, then took Zuko’s hand and led him away. Zuko looked over his shoulder. He couldn’t see much in the chaos, but caught a glimpse of red.

-----

Zuko didn’t find out what had happened until much later, when Toklo came to his tent to bring him to dinner.

“Something happened earlier. What?” Zuko asked immediately.

“It was crazy, little bro. A Fire Nation soldier walked into camp and asked to join our side.”

“Who?”

“That’s the craziest part! General Iroh! The Dragon of the West!” Toklo shook his head. “Can you believe it?”

“Yes. Uncle said he would meet up with me again,” Zuko said matter-of-factly. Toklo facepalmed.

“That’s right! He’s your uncle! Okay, it’s a bit less crazy now. But how did he know where we were?” He paused. “What do you mean, he said he would meet up with you?”

“When Hakoda and Kustaa took me to see a healer, Uncle spotted us. He asked to come aboard the Akhlut. The Chief turned him down, but at told Uncle where we were headed, so that he could meet us,” Zuko rattled off.

“Why didn’t you tell me before?” Toklo demanded.

“I was sick.”

“Fair enough.” Toklo took Zuko’s hand. “Time for dinner!”

“No, I want to see Uncle first,” Zuko said, yanking his hand free of Toklo’s hold.

“I don’t think-” Toklo started. Before he could finish the sentence, Zuko bolted out of the tent. “Hey!”

Zuko made a beeline for the largest tent, which served as a command center. Uncle might not be there, but Hakoda or Bato should be, and they would take him to Uncle. Right? The moment he ducked inside the tent, Zuko’s eyes landed on Uncle.

“Uncle!” Zuko shrieked happily. He ran over to the retired general. Uncle scooped him into a tight embrace.

“Nephew, it is so good to see you again.” Uncle held Zuko at arm’s distance. “You look much healthier now.” Zuko beamed. Uncle set him back on the ground. “This was not the best move to make, however.”

“What?”

“Chief Hakoda informed me before of your cover as a Water Tribe war child. The way you just behaved, while very heartwarming, was not in character for Nuktuk.”

“I don’t care.”

“You should, nephew. Keeping up appearances is very important, particularly in your situation,” Uncle said patiently.

“Luckily, I’m the only other person in the tent,” Hakoda spoke up. Zuko looked over, realizing he was there for the first time.

“Where is Uncle going to stay?” Zuko asked.

“Eventually, with you,” Uncle replied. “Chief Hakoda and I were just discussing our plans.”

“The story we’ll be telling is that General Iroh, devastated by the loss of his nephew, had his eyes opened to the reality of the war. As such, he has arrived at the camp to switch sides and offer his help.”

“Like the best of lies, it contains some truth,” Uncle said, nodding. “I won’t be allowed to be around you until Chief Hakoda’s men trust me. So I am very glad you sought me out on your own.”

“Toklo told me you were here.”

“Toklo would be…?”

“My friend.”

“Ah.” Uncle’s face creased with a broad, warm smile. “What a wonderful thing you hear you say. You should go find this friend of yours and have dinner with him.”

“But-” Zuko started.

“Don’t worry,” Hakoda said. “General Iroh will be here for a while.”

-----

“You’re very articulate for your age, Nuktuk,” gushed one of the Southern tribesmen that Zuko had yet to know by name. Zuko smiled politely. He bowed.

“Thank you,” he said. The tribesman chuckled and ruffled his hair.

“Keep up your firebending practice, kiddo. Who knows, maybe you’ll be the first Water Tribe firebending Master.” Zuko’s smile became more forced. He didn’t mean to be caught firebending, but Uncle had begun to teach him firebending again, and someone had witnessed one of the lessons. Since then, tribesmen approached him near constantly, curious about the firebending Water Tribe toddler.

“You should probably get back to work, Kenai,” Panuk said. Ah, the man’s name was Kenai. “Otherwise, you’ll get your ass beat for slacking.”

“Watch your language around the kid!” Kenai said in shock. Panuk laughed. He gave Zuko an affectionate noogie.

“The kid spent months on a ship. He knows just about every swear under the sun,” Panuk said. Kenai shook his head disapprovingly.

“Geez. Well, see you later, Nuktuk. And you too, Panuk.” Kenai walked away, whistling. Zuko smirked at Panuk.

“You’re an afterthought,” he teased. Panuk laughed.

“Only because Kenai’s a big brother. He can’t resist cute little kids.”

“That explains why he felt the need to talk to me,” Zuko said thoughtfully. “I thought word had spread about me.”

“Oh, it definitely has. There’s no one who doesn’t know who you are.” Panuk poked Zuko playfully. Zuko slapped the hand away, laughing. “Wait…you guys have a kid here?” a voice said. The hairs on the back of Zuko’s neck rose. That voice… He turned his head ever so slightly. His eyes widened. It was him.

“Huh, I guess someone doesn’t know who you are,” Panuk remarked, looking as well. He frowned. “He must be new.”

“Sokka,” Zuko ground out. Panuk’s head whipped around to stare at Zuko.

“That’s the Chief’s son?” he asked. Zuko nodded, his jaw clenched. “I see it now. They look pretty similar.”

“Why is he here?” Zuko snarled.

“Probably because, like I said, he’s the Chief’s son,” Panuk drawled. “I wonder if the Avatar’s with him.”

“That’s Nuktuk,” Hakoda informed Sokka. They were far enough away that there was no chance Sokka could recognize Zuko, but Zuko’s heart still pounded in his chest. His fingers twitched. He couldn’t decide whether he wanted to run at Sokka or away from him. “We found him in a destroyed village on our way out of the South Pole. He’s been with us ever since.”

“Really? He’s just a kid! How old is he, two?”

“Four,” Hakoda said calmly. Panuk reached for Zuko’s hand.

“I think it’s time to take you somewhere else, little warrior.” The moment his hand touched Zuko’s, he let out a soft yelp of pain. “What was that about?” Zuko looked up at Panuk.

“What?”

“You burned me, squirt.”

“Oh. Whoops.” Zuko resumed glaring at Sokka, who was still arguing with Hakoda.

“Wh- you’d take a four-year-old on your ship, but not your own son? Who, I’ll remind you, was a lot older than four when you left?”

“Sokka…” Hakoda’s voice was weary. “You don’t want to be in that kid’s boots. He’s seen things no child should ever see.”

“Oh, you think I haven’t? I traveled with the Avatar!” Sokka’s shouts were beginning to attract attention. Zuko could feel the control he’d worked so hard to cultivate slipping; droplets of flame fell off his fingers, lighting the grass on fire.

-----

Iroh, while relaxing in the tent he shared with Zuko, heard bickering outside. Curious, he exited the tent. He took in the scene. Panuk and Zuko stood nearby, Zuko staring at something and Panuk stomping on smoking grass. Small flames were dancing around Zuko’s fingers, his good eye squinting in a glare to match his bad one. It didn’t take a genius to figure out the cause of Zuko’s irritation. Some distance away, but growing closer, were the people he had heard bickering: Chief Hakoda and Sokka, the Water Tribe boy that had accompanied the Avatar.

The Water Tribe boy who, in his first encounter with Zuko, had hit him in the head with a boomerang.

“It’s wonderful to see a familiar face,” Iroh said warmly, walking over to Sokka and Hakoda. Behind him, he could hear Panuk finally ushering Zuko away, out of sight of the chief’s son. Sokka stared at him.

“Hang on, you’re that one guy!” he said, eloquently. Iroh smiled.

“Yes, I am.”

“What are you doing at a Water Tribe camp?”

“After what happened at the North Pole, I could no longer stand by and allow my nation’s war to continue,” Iroh said simply. Sokka crossed his arms.

“Really,” he said flatly. “After everything the Fire Nation’s done, killing a fish was what made you realize they were evil?” Something in his voice quivered a bit, like he didn’t believe the loss of the Moon Spirit was as minimal as he was trying to make it sound. Iroh bowed his head slightly.

“Yes. I spent some time traveling the Earth Kingdom and eventually came to join this encampment, with the blessing of none other than your father,” Iroh said. His words were technically true, but left out important details. The kind of lying Iroh preferred to do.

“You trusted him, Dad?” Sokka asked. Chief Hakoda nodded. “Why?”

“People I trust spoke for him,” Chief Hakoda said simply.

“Like who?”

“Master Pakku of the Northern Water Tribe, for one.”

“Wait.” Sokka stared at Iroh. “You know Master Sourpuss?” Iroh chuckled. Sourpuss was certainly an apt description for his old friend.

“Yes. I have for some time.”

“How?”

“That’s a rather long story, and not important,” Iroh said smoothly. “Let me guess, you, your friends, and the Avatar have arrived at Ba Sing Se?”

“Yeah…”

“Would you be so kind as to allow me to walk with you? I would like to hear the wonderful stories of your adventures.” Sokka looked uncertain, but after a moment, nodded.

“Sure. But you better not be sending information back to the Fire Lord!” Sokka snapped. Hakoda rolled his eyes. Iroh merely smiled and nodded.

“Of course.”

-----

Bato found Zuko wandering around the camp, peering into tents with a confused expression.

“Are you looking for something, little warrior?” he asked. Zuko looked up at him, brow furrowed.

“Where’s Uncle?”

“He went with Sokka and Aang to Ba Sing Se,” Bato replied. Zuko crossed his arms.

“Stupid Avatar. He’s my uncle,” Zuko muttered. Bato covered his mouth, poorly smothering a snicker at the firebender’s immature behavior. Zuko stomped his foot. “Don’t laugh!”

“Relax. Come on, it’s time for your nap, anyways.” Bato took Zuko’s hand and led him back to the tent Zuko shared with Iroh. Toklo was already there, looking for Zuko.

“Where’d you run off to, little brother?” Toklo teased.

“I was looking for Uncle,” Zuko mumbled. He let out a small yawn.

“When Iroh gets back, I’ll send him your way,” Bato promised. Zuko nodded. Toklo led him into the tent for his nap.

Zuko was still napping when chaos erupted at the encampment. Bato and Hakoda were in the midst of going over battle plans, only for Katara to burst in the head tent. The excitement Hakoda felt at seeing his daughter was quickly subdued when Sokka came in close behind, carrying the unnervingly still body of the Avatar.

“What…happened?” Hakoda croaked, staring at Aang.

“Lightning,” huffed a short girl, who, judging by her milky eyes, was blind. Katara laid Aang on the ground and held glowing water over his body. Her forehead was drenched in sweat, her hands shaking. Sokka didn’t seem to be doing much better. “The Fire Princess struck Aang with lightning.” A man in extravagant, expensive clothes poked his head into the tent curiously.

“What should I do?” he asked. The short girl huffed again.

“Could someone entertain the Earth King?” she asked, turning her sightless eyes in the direction of Hakoda and Bato.

“…Earth King?” Hakoda and Bato said simultaneously.

“Kids, what happened?” Hakoda repeated.

“I told you, lightning.”

“I need more information than that.”

“After I’ve stabilized Aang, we can talk, Dad, but right now, I need to focus,” Katara snapped. Hakoda bit back an instinct to scold her for her tone. She was under an immense amount of stress; it was more than understandable she’d be on edge. Sokka got up from where he was crouching at Aang’s side.

“I can explain. It’s better if we leave the tent while Katara heals Aang. Toph, stay here.” The blind girl, apparently named Toph, nodded. Sokka, Hakoda, and Bato left the tent.

“What in the world is that thing?” Bato asked, staring at the strange creature before them.

“It’s a bear,” Sokka answered.

“Platypus-bear?”

“No, just a bear. Weird, I know.” Sokka sighed. “He’s the Earth King’s best friend or something like that, so the bear came with us when Ba Sing Se fell.”

“Ba Sing Se fell?” Hakoda asked in an undertone. Sokka’s head drooped.

“Yeah. Princess Azula staged a coup. We got out with the Earth King and his bear, but during the fight, Aang was struck by lightning.”

“What about Iroh?” Bato pried. Sokka slumped further.

“He was taken prisoner. We had the one good firebender in the world on our side, and we let him get caught.”

“I’m sure Iroh isn’t the only good firebender,” Hakoda said, resting a hand on Sokka’s shoulder. His gaze fell on Zuko and Iroh’s tent, where the toddler was, presumably, still fast asleep.

“I don’t know, Dad. It really seems like he is.” Sokka rubbed his eyes, drawing Hakoda’s attention to just how tired his son seemed. Hakoda yearned to just tell Sokka to go to bed. But if Ba Sing Se had truly fallen, they had no time to waste. They needed to abandon the encampment and set sail immediately. Hakoda squeezed Sokka’s shoulder.

“Stay here with your sister. Bato, spread the word that we need to leave now. I’ll take care of Nuktuk.” Bato’s eyes widened.

“The kid is not going to be happy.”

“That’s why I’ll be breaking the news to him.” Hakoda squeezed Sokka’s shoulder one more time and set off for Zuko and Iroh’s tent.

-----

The tent didn’t burn down. But only barely. Zuko’s initial, destructive meltdown upon hearing what had happened to Iroh exhausted him so much that he passed out soon after. It was easy enough to smuggle the sleeping toddler aboard the Akhlut without Hakoda’s children or his children’s friends noticing. Keeping up the secrecy was far more difficult.

“Why won’t you let them see you?” Hakoda asked. Weary from stress, his voice came out harsher than he intended. Zuko flinched slightly. “I’m sorry, Zuko, I didn’t mean to say it that way. But you know they won’t recognize you, right?”

“They might,” Zuko mumbled. “I can’t risk it. I’ll be humiliated.”

“…Fine. But you’ll have to ask Toklo or Panuk to help you move around the ship without being seen. I’m busy.” The Akhlut, though beloved, would need to be abandoned. There were too many Fire Navy ships now. As such, they had plans to take a Fire Nation ship themselves. Hakoda had been working on those very plans when Zuko entered his cabin, wanting attention.

Of course he wants attention, his life has been upheaved and he’s lost his uncle again. Hakoda pinched the bridge of his nose and took a calming breath. He could hear Kya’s voice, scolding him for not explaining why he was saying “no” to a toddler. Young children will cooperate more if they have an explanation. Zuko is no exception. Explain things to him.

“Once we’ve captured a new ship, I might be able to spend some more time with you. At the very least, you won’t have to hide. I imagine we can find you your own room.” Hakoda forced a smile. “Would you like that?”

“Maybe,” Zuko mumbled. He cocked his head curiously. “We’re capturing a ship?”

“You aren’t. But the rest of us are. The Fire Nation is sending their Navy to Ba Sing Se, to prevent any early uprisings. The Akhlut stands out. It’s best if we blend in.” Zuko nodded slowly. “I understand if you feel uncomfortable with this, but it’s our only option.” Zuko nodded again.

“Can I…stay in here?” he asked. Hakoda stifled a sigh.

He’s a lonely child. He’s always been. Hakoda nodded.

“If you stay quiet, yes.” Zuko beamed. He walked over to Hakoda and climbed onto the chief’s lap. As Hakoda worked on the plans, Zuko occasionally piped up with a comment about Fire Navy ships. The intermittent inputs became further and further apart. When it had been some time since Zuko last spoke, Hakoda looked down at his lap.

The former Fire Nation Prince had fallen asleep, lulled by the late hour, gentle swaying of the boat, and Hakoda’s body heat.

-----

They were having another awkwardly silent meal when Toph finally said something she’d had on her mind the minute they all boarded a metal ship, allowing her to “see” again.

“What’s the deal with the kid?” she asked. Hakoda casually set his chopsticks down. To someone who could see, no doubt he appeared untroubled. But to someone who could see, he was nervous. The chief’s heartrate had sped up immediately.

“There are a lot of children on board,” Hakoda said calmly. “Namely, the three of you and Aang.”

“No, there’s someone here even younger than us,” Toph said. “They’re running around on the deck right now.” Katara rose from her seat, presumably to glance out the window that opened onto the deck.

“Toph’s right,” Katara said.

“No need to sound so surprised,” Toph grumbled, pretending to be offended.

“I wasn’t-” Katara huffed. She sat back down. “That looked like a little boy, younger than some of the kids were when we left the village.” Hakoda sighed.

“I was hoping to keep him hidden from you.”

“Why?” Katara asked.

“You shouldn’t be distracted from your current mission.”

Lie.

“Not to mention, he’s rather shy.”

Truth.

“What’s his name?” Toph asked.

“Nuktuk.”

Lie.

“We found him in a mostly destroyed village as we were leaving the South Pole.”

Lie.

“Wait, that’s the kid that I saw in camp that one day,” Sokka said suddenly.

“Yes.”

Truth.

“How old is he?” Katara asked.

“Four,” Hakoda replied. Toph’s eyes widened slightly. That hadn’t felt like a full lie nor a full truth. She settled her expression to be neutral again. “Please don’t seek him out. I know you might want to spend time with him, particularly you, Katara, but like I said, he’s shy. And he’s going through some things.”

“Like what?” Toph asked. She picked up her chopsticks.

“Well, he lost his uncle during the fall of Ba Sing Se. He’s been very upset about it.”

“Poor thing,” Katara murmured. Toph picked at her food idly.

Truth.

-----

The ocean was boring for a blind earthbender. Toph didn’t spend any time on deck if she could avoid it. Not when sudden gusts of wind might try to blow her away. Their only airbender was out of commission, so it wouldn’t be easy to bring her back.

At the casual reminder of Aang’s state, Toph felt a twinge of sadness. She shook it off, refocusing on her mission. There was a toddler on this ship using a fake name and a fake backstory. Sure, it wasn’t as fun to investigate as the mysteries of Ba Sing Se, but it was better than staring at water she couldn’t see.

Toph made her way belowdeck, past the mess hall and infirmary, finally coming to a stop outside of a small cabin. Inside the room, sitting cross-legged on the floor, was “Nuktuk”. She opened the door. The boy sprang to his feet instantly. A wave of heat washed over Toph. She cocked her head curiously, recognizing the sensation as that of fire.

“That’s why the chief doesn’t want anyone to know about you,” she said calmly. “You’re a firebender.” The boy’s heartrate doubled.

“How- you- but you’re blind!” he finally squeaked. Toph entered the room and closed the door behind her.

“Yeah, but I can still probably see better than you, Sparky.” The boy let out another squeak of protest at the nickname. “Who are you, really?”

“I’m- I’m Nuktuk.”

Lie.

“Who are you?” the boy asked. Toph sat on the floor, her feet flush against the metal so she could keep track of the kid’s heartbeat.

“You know what? I’ll tell you the truth if you tell me the truth,” she said. “That seems like a fair trade to me.” The boy wavered. After a moment, he sat across from her. The heat faded, presumably because he had put out whatever flames he’d created.

“How’d you know I lied?” he asked quietly.

“That’s for me to know, not you.”

“Hmph.”

“What’s your real name?” Toph asked again.

“…I can’t tell you.”

“Can’t or don’t want to?”

“The- the second one.”

Truth.

“I’ll tell you the truth now. I’m Toph. Why don’t you want to tell me your real name?”

“Then you’ll know who I am. And that’s embarrassing. Also…you wouldn’t like me.”

Truth.

“All right. Since you told the truth again, here’s another from me. I knew you lied because I’m an earthbender.” The boy huffed quietly, like he didn’t believe her. “Why wouldn’t I like you if I knew who you were? I already figured out that you were a firebender, and I’m not exactly trying to attack you or anything.” The boy stayed silent, but fidgeted slightly. The temperature in the room rose.

All right, touchy subject. Moving on.

“The Chief said you lost your uncle when Ba Sing Se fell.”

“…Yeah.”

“Was he in the city or something? How’d you know you lost him?”

“People- people saw it happen. And they told other people. And the other people told me.”

“Who? The only people that I know of who were able to escape to the camp were the people on Appa. Appa is-”

“I know who Appa is,” the boy groused.

Truth.

“Well, like I said, only the people on Appa made it to the camp. And none of us would have known some random firebender’s uncle.” Something clicked into place. “Unless…” The boy’s heartrate, which had slowed somewhat, picked up again. “Was your uncle Iroh?”

“No!” the boy blurted out immediately.

Lie.

“Iroh said he had a nephew,” Toph said, thinking out loud. The boy’s heart sped even faster. “I never met his nephew, but Katara and Sokka and Aang did. Apparently, he chased them around the world for a long time, before he disappeared without a trace. The only problem is, they said he was sixteen. How old are you?”

“Four.”

Again, that weird “not a full lie, not a full truth” thing. But the boy seemed to think it was more of a lie than the Chief did. Not to mention, Toph hadn’t met a lot of children, but she felt like someone who was actually four wouldn’t be more eloquent than Sokka.

“…Zuko?” Toph asked quietly. The boy sprung to his feet, his heart beating so fast, Toph was surprised he didn’t keel over then and there.

“How- you-” he spluttered.

“So you are Zuko,” Toph said. The boy – Zuko – stayed standing. “Spirits, what happened to you, if you’re-” Toph made a vague gesture in Zuko’s direction. “-this?”

“You answered it,” Zuko said. He sat down again. “Spirits.” A scowl shone through his irritated tone.

“Spirits turned you into a little kid?”

“Yes.”

“Huh. That stinks,” Toph said casually. Zuko let out a soft snort.

“It does.” He fidgeted. “You- you can’t tell anyone about it, okay? I’ll die if that Water Tribe boy finds out what I’ve been reduced to.”

Truth. Man, he is really embarrassed by this.

“Why are you so embarrassed?” Toph asked. “I mean, you didn’t do it. The spirits did it.”

“It’s still- it’s-” Zuko was spluttering again. “You’re what, ten?”

“Twelve.”

“Does the Water Tribe boy treat you like a kid, even though you’re younger than him?”

“No.” Toph grinned viciously. “He knows I’d kick his ass.”

“I don’t have that luxury. He might be a non-bender, but I’m…” Zuko cleared his throat. “I don’t have access to my full abilities currently, and I’m much smaller than usual. Both the Water Tribe children would harass me for it, but the boy would never let me live it down.”

“I getcha.” Toph got up. “No worries, Sparky, your secret’s safe with me.”

“…Really?” Zuko asked. Toph nodded.

“I get it. I’ve been treated like shit for things I can’t control. I’m not about doing that to others.”

“I’ve heard you teasing your teammates,” Zuko said doubtfully.

“Yeah, over things they can control, like their terrible jokes. You can’t control what the spirits did to you. You don’t deserve to be messed with for it. Especially since you seem like a nice enough kid.”

Zuko spluttered again.

Toph grinned.

“Good luck turning back into a teenager.” Toph headed for the door. Just as she opened it, Zuko mumbled something, quiet enough that she barely heard.

“Thanks.”

-----

Running footsteps sounded in the hall. Curious, Zuko cracked open the door to his room and peered out. His eyes widened.

The Avatar was awake.

And judging by his clumsiness, either disoriented from how long he spent asleep or drunk. After the Avatar had stumbled out of Zuko’s view, he closed the door again.

-----

The door to Zuko’s room slowly creaked open. Zuko jumped to his feet, abandoning the Pai Sho board he was practicing with. The intruder blinked at Zuko owlishly.

“…This isn’t my room.”

“No. It’s mine,” Zuko said firmly. The intruder stepped inside. A shiver ran down Zuko’s spine. It was the Avatar. The Avatar approached Zuko and crouched down, smiling warmly at him.

“I didn’t know there was a kid on this ship.”

“I’m not a kid,” Zuko retorted. The Avatar chuckled. The serious, uncertain demeanor he’d had when entering seemed to have lessened.

Good. It’s weird if he’s not annoyingly upbeat.

“I’m Aang. What’s your name?”

“…Nuktuk.”

“Nuktuk. That’s a really tough name! I bet you’ll be a great Water Tribe warrior someday!” the Avatar said cheerfully. “Why are you on the ship?”

“I…” Zuko looked away. The Avatar let out a soft gasp. Zuko bit back a curse. The shadows in the room must have obscured his scar, only for it to become obvious when he’d turned his head. Surely, the Avatar would figure out who he was.

“Nuktuk, how did you get that scar?” the Avatar asked gently. Zuko looked at him, surprised.

He…doesn’t recognize me?

“A…” Zuko fumbled for a response, then remembered his cover story. “A bad man.”

“A bad man,” the Avatar repeated. Zuko nodded. “Is the bad man why you’re on the ship?” Zuko nodded again. “Is your family on the ship?”

“No. The bad man hurt them.” Zuko shrugged. “I’m alone.” The Avatar sat back, horror etched on his face. Zuko worked furiously to control his own facial expression. But rather than horrified, he felt indignant.

Really? The Avatar’s own people were killed. Is he actually still moved by the tragedies of war, even after witnessing so many? Despite his best attempts to doubt the Avatar’s sincerity, Zuko knew the answer to that question.

The Avatar was deeply affected by every reminder of what war wrought.

“Nuktuk, I’m sorry,” the Avatar said softly. Zuko blinked, startled. “It’s- it’s my fault the bad man hurt you and your family, leaving you all alone. I’m the Avatar. My responsibility is to prevent innocent people from being hurt, especially innocent little kids like you.” The Avatar got to his feet, determination shining in his weary gray eyes. “Don’t worry, I’m going to bring that bad man, and all the other bad men, to justice.”

“Y-you are?” Zuko squeaked.

Is a literal twelve-year-old going to confront my father? The Avatar nodded.

“I am.” The Avatar managed a small smile. “And just so you know…” The Avatar trailed off. He cleared his throat. “I was the only one left, too. We’ve got that in common. And if we’ve got something in common, then we aren’t really alone.” He ruffled Zuko’s hair. “Good night, Nuktuk.” The Avatar left, closing the door gently behind him.

When Panuk checked on Zuko later, to make sure he’d actually gone to bed, the former prince was still staring silently at the door.

-----

The Avatar’s allies were saying their goodbyes to the crew during the night. It was the best way to avoid detection.

For some reason, Zuko had been brought on deck for the farewell, though he had to be woken up. He stood next to Bato, still bleary from sleep, hiding the scarred side of his face behind the crewman’s leg. Even if they saw his scar, it wasn’t likely he’d be recognized, but he didn’t want to risk it.

Toph punched Toklo and Panuk’s shoulders; she had gotten along well with them. The only other thing she did before boarding the Avatar’s sky bison was look in Zuko’s direction. She nodded silently. Zuko returned the gesture, then held himself still as the Water Tribe girl – Katara – walked over to him. She crouched down to his eye-height and gently stroked his hair.

“It was nice to finally meet you, Nuktuk,” she said sweetly. Zuko looked away, part of him reeling with how tender her voice could be.

Of course, the only other times she’s spoken with me, we weren’t exactly on good terms.

“Don’t worry, we’re going to get the Avatar and help him take down the Fire Lord. You’ll be reunited with your uncle before you know it.”

“…Thanks,” Zuko mumbled into Bato’s leg. Katara’s eyes softened further.

“Katara, come on, stop fussing over the baby,” Sokka shouted from the Avatar’s sky bison. He had made his goodbyes first. Katara stood to her full height and embraced her father.

“Be careful, sweetie,” Hakoda said.

“I’ll do my best.” Katara broke off the hug. “We’ll see you on the Day of Black Sun.” Zuko’s eyes widened.

The solar eclipse? They know about that?

“Yes. Remember what I told you.”

“Take care of each other,” Katara intoned solemnly. Hakoda smiled and stroked Katara’s cheek.

“That’s right.”

-----

Zuko watched the sky bison fly away, an uncomfortable churning in his gut. Without the constant fear of being discovered by the Water Tribe children in the back of his mind, the enormity of his situation came crashing down upon him.

Things had improved for a while, but now? Now, he was back to square one. No, even worse than square one. Uncle wasn’t captured before. There was at least one holdout in the entire Earth Kingdom before. Zuko could pretend the Avatar was continuing his streak of avoiding real harm before.

None of those were true now.

Zuko slowly sat down on the deck, staring at the metal silently.

“Are you all right?” Hakoda asked. Zuko shrugged. “It’s a yes or no answer.” The boy remained silent. Hakoda sighed. “Well, in that case, why don’t you-”

“We know about the solar eclipse,” Zuko blurted out. The crew, which had begun to resume regular duties after the bison’s departure, froze. Hakoda crouched next to Zuko.

“By ‘we’, you mean…”

“The Fire Nation.” Someone swore softly. “Of course the Fire Nation knows about the solar eclipse! Firebenders have a vested interest in their ability to firebend!”

“Zuko.” Zuko looked up at Hakoda. “Thank you for telling me this.”

“You’re welcome,” Zuko mumbled. Hakoda got to his feet.

“We’ll need to send a bird immediately to our allies. If the Fire Nation knows about the eclipse, they’ll have prepared for it.” Hakoda looked at Zuko. “Right?” Zuko nodded.

“This is going to mess up our plans,” Bato said. Hakoda grinned.

“No, it’s going to make them better.”

“We don’t know what the Fire Nation’s preparations will be like,” Tuluk argued.

“We don’t.” Hakoda looked at Zuko again. “But we’ve got someone on board who does.”

“I don’t know if the kid’s willing to turn against his people,” Aake rumbled. Zuko crossed his arms.

“The kid is right here,” he snapped. Aake raised an eyebrow.

“Are you willing to turn against your people?” he asked. The churning in Zuko’s stomach amplified.

My people. Yue had told him not to turn his back on his people. But if he told the crew how the Fire Nation prepared for the eclipse, he would be doing just that. Although…would I? His people weren’t just the Fire Nation anymore. He’d been helped by all the nations. Even the Avatar had promised to bring justice to those who had hurt him.

Zuko touched his scar.

He thought of the 41st Division, the soldiers sent to their deaths as canon fodder. Surely, ending the war wouldn’t help just the Water Tribes and Earth Kingdom. The people of the Fire Nation were suffering, too.

Zuko’s hand fell from his face. The churning in his stomach quieted. He looked up at Hakoda, his eyes meeting the Chief’s squarely.

“I’m not turning against my people,” he said. “I’m doing my part to end a war that has hurt us all. I’ll tell you everything I know.” A proud smile slowly spread across Hakoda’s face.

“Thank you, son.”

…Son?

“You can tell me in the morning. For now, you should go back to sleep,” Hakoda said. Zuko nodded as tiredness abruptly hit him over the head. He allowed Kustaa to lead him to the infirmary, where his furs were waiting.

The full moon shining down brightened. Just a bit.

#Zuko #Uncle Iroh #Hakoda #Bato #Toph #Sokka #Katara #Aang #ATLA #Spirit Touched #btw no fucking clue when the final chapter goes up. it's been slow going for writing #.....sigh. the curse of the fic writer.#I haven't been as inspired as I was for the previous chapters #(also I've been feeling guilty about my GF WIPs and that's been making my writing slower too)#my writing #my stuff #fanfiction #speecher speaks

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