Every now and then a song will come on and I’ll see someone singing along and they light up and know every word and I immediately want to know. Did your mom sing that while she made pancakes? Did your older brother blare it from behind his bedroom door? Did your little sister and her friends play it on repeat while they choreographed a dance? Did your best friend have it playing in the car every time they picked you up for school? Did your coworkers make you sing it on karaoke night? Why do you love it? Tell me everything.

Jackie and Wilson is still a banger almost 10 years later and I love Hozier for that. Everybody thank our Irish Jesus for making music that does not age

sometimes you just gotta lay in bed and put music in your headphones and close your eyes allow yourself to heal

There has been a rendition of The First Lie in every season since s2, and I want a s5 byler kiss to follow this pattern . ‘Being Different’ (the track played in the van monologue) has such a beautiful, contemplative build-up, before it breaks into a mellow, bittersweet version of the First Lie riff at the end. I would love it if the same build-up was there, and then when they kiss it breaks fully into a euphoric version of the riff.

Something about Being Different being about Will’s insecurities and heartbreak, and having it transformed into something unapologetically loving and uplifting would just be so beautiful

so the turning out trilogy has been all about finding the purpose of love and what makes romantic love so special, and turning out pt. iii really was the perfect conclusion to the trilogy.

in the first turning out, we wonder about the difference between platonic and romantic love, and how that changes as you grow up. you may grow out of people you used to love, no matter how much you wish they could stick around.

turning out pt. ii focuses on falling out of love, and wondering if it was ever really love in the first place. if you love someone, shouldn’t that last forever? it’s a hard truth to swallow, and even the lyrics admit “I don’t love it much at all.”

finally turning out pt. iii comes along, and honestly at first the message is a little hopeless. the song focuses on what society has conditioned us to think of love: the point of love is to get married, have kids, and probably get divorced one day, no matter how much you thought you loved each other. it’s bleak.

but it’s not the truth. in the outro of pt. iii, we settle on the true purpose of love. it’s not about having someone unchanging you never outgrow. it’s not about forcing yourself to stay in a relationship just because you think you’re supposed to love someone. and it’s not about marriage and reproduction, and falling into what society expects of couples.

it’s about having someone by your side to get through life with. life is hard, and sometimes all you can do is focus on one day at a time, and even that can be hell. but that’s all so much easier when you have someone by your side, someone you love and trust and who loves and trusts you. love doesn’t have to be this big grandiose thing; in fact, love is “little and quiet.” love is about having “someone to do life with.” I think that’s beautiful, and am more than happy to agree with ryan met’s purpose of love.

Clean house, dinner cooking, an old song randomly coming on that touches your soul and transports you back to another time. Sweet memories making you smile, tearing up a little from the swell of love for that time…. It’s a good evening ☺️ Happy Sunday friends. I hope it’s been good to you. ♥️

Indian Goddess aka Drama Queen 💋

HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT

AND HYMS????

THE POOR WAYFARING STRANGER. I AM GOING TO PASS AWAAAY

Jesus Christ, coming back 10-15 years later to old music you used to love and put your entire soul into really doesn't compare to anything does it

this transition>>>>>>>>>>

I was a miserable musician myself, but I knew how to use music in my own way. Over the years I’d inspired some epic kisses by occupying a barstool alone in a dark, inconspicuous corner and taking over a juke box. I never minded being out all by myself. I loved observing their bodies react to my selection, people jump to their feet to dance, eyes widen and shoot directly to a lover or friend, a full table start to sing along together, or just a solo, grumpy old man start tapping his feet on the rung. In the right crowd I could completely transform a room without anyone even knowing I was there.. except maybe the bartender. Old Fashioned, please. It was magic to me.

Continuing from my last post bout Mind, we also need to talk more about how paranoid & untrusting/second-guessing your mind can be cause i think its very interesting

Love Covers A Multitude Of Sins:

All day yesterday, I was heavy thinking about how you can’t have forgiveness without love. They go hand in hand. I’ve been writing down my story because I’ve been trying to understand what all has happened to me… only because it’s all impacted my present health and way of thinking. However, I don’t want to talk bad about my exes Cody and Andrew. I know I wasn’t perfect when I was originally talking to them. I tried to “love” them purely but I also was very lustful with them. 😝 I use to think it was okay because I wanted a man and I use to be addicted to porn, so being addicted to “a man” only filled the void of porn. It’s not love though and it’s not healthy. It’s very toxic. That’s not how you treat people but sadly I can’t change the past.

I’ve tried and tried to share the blame of the past. Tried to not put it all on my exes only but in doing so, I find myself picking up the burdens of the past and carrying them. That’s also not good either because the burdens are heavy and make you depressed or weighed down. Preventing me from enjoy the present life I’m in. I can only forgive myself and my exes. I’ve been saying it for over a year that I “forgive them” but then I find myself not being able to quit talking about it all. I realize I’m learning many many lessons about myself and about relationships but I’ve got to be careful I don’t ruminate too much, I don’t wanna have a fantasy mindset about Andrew or further hold the past over their heads because they can’t undo what they did and I pray they’ve since then had some self awareness the way I have!!!

Ya know, Cody told me about all these “disorders” he had and I clearly didn’t understand any of it or I would’ve responded differently to him. I was under the impression that “love” could fix anything and of course after my relationship with both Cody and Andrew, I doubted love some. I felt the coldness from them and it made me a tad cold too. 😞 I never wanna feel that way again. I’ve been slowly coming back to life. I’ve been realizing that in being isolated by them, it didn’t just affect my mood but my ability to love … My mind and body responded in a way that was “protective of self” Mind soul and body are ALL connected and so my mind senses danger and alerted my body and my body slowly began to get sick.

LOVE is patient, kind, honest, doesn’t get jealous, isn’t selfish and is long-suffering. I tried to suffer with cody and Andrew. Months with Andrew off and on had me in isolation and would cry to me how hard his college homework was and I would try so hard to encourage him but the stress was getting to me. I felt like no matter what I said to Andrew to make it all better, it only got worse. That’s abusive.,. HOWEVER, I know I tried to be long-suffering and patient. THAT I don’t regret… Love always is greater than any kind of hate and love always wins ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

Yesterday I kept telling myself “You still gotta love them even though you don’t trust them and you’re sad over them. Don’t carry anger or negativity towards them but you have got to take the high road and let them go. Even if they never change in their hearts or feel sorry for hurting you.” Sure, I want to right the wrongs between us. I want to forgive the sins of myself and my exes but only God has that power. I do pray for them regularly as I can. I mean, it’s not always been easy. Some times I just felt like “I do forgive them but… they did a, b & c to me…”

I also have had the opposite mindset where I take so much blame to lighten their loads that it weighs me down and makes me hate myself. NEITHER is good. ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹 It’s better if I just pray, “God you know the truth of what really happened and only you can heal my mental and take away my sadness. Only you can help my exes be better men in their hearts.” I DO NOT want to judge them. I have been writing down what happened between us trying to make it all make sense and some days I feel so guilty cuz it’s like, “am I judging them and making assumptions of them?” I don’t know their hearts or heads.

For all I know, my exes had good intentions but struggled in various areas of themselves and possibly it made it hard for them to express it to me?? Only God knows their true intentions and God took them both out of my life for reasons I have to accept. I tried to keep Andrew in my life. I tried to be “good enough” for him while he wouldn’t stop crying that he wasn’t good enough for me… It only hurt me more to try to force it all. I couldn’t make Andrew be everything I wanted him to be. His actions never matched his words and he only confused me over and over. That caused me to doubt myself and my perceptions of love and respect. I couldn’t trust my own self after Andrew because why did I NOT see that Andrew was lying to me from day one. 🥺💔

Each day I’ve been untangling myself from strands of Andrew’s web of lies. Not just him but Jake (who I struggle to talk about or remember) he also for years off and on critized me and put me down. Then the biggest lie of all was school labeling me with a “learning disability” as a kid. It’s ALL come down on me and tried to keep me down but I’m one day at a time, rising back up and learning sooooo much.

In conclusion, the past is written in stone. It’s done with and over. Now where do I go from here??? My healing journey is more about me in the present than my exes or past mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes and has sinned in their life. Forgiving myself has been terribly hard because in the last 3/4 years I’ve suffered health issues and just this year alone I’ve felt extremely disconnected and detached from life and from enjoying life fully. I have felt trapped in this “healing journey” but questioned “Am I actually healing??” Not enough information about emotional abuse has changed me but also not knowing how to apply it all to my current life. Learning from past mistakes, is to keep yourself from making the same ones again. LOVE is bigger than hate. If my exes truly hated me or still hate me, that won’t hurt me because love will win. Maybe it doesn’t look like it now but one day everything will be fixed. God will be with me through all of it but I have to keep the right mindset and I can’t judge my exes or myself even. I HAVE to let God forgive it all. I’ll probably never get to face my exes and tell them I forgive them and that’s okay. I’m trying to do it in my heart. God please don’t give up on me or my exes. God please change their lives and hearts. I just want them to be safe, happy and healthy ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹 I don’t want justice on them. I don’t want them to owe me anything or pay any kind of punishment. I just want to continue to learn from the past and go forward. I don’t wanna be cold and angry. I pray my exes aren’t cold and that they can love and have love. Please God 🙏🏻❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹 I HAVE to rewire my brain from the past and change the way I see myself now.

I need more women lead singers who literally cannot sing. Like there are so many male-fronted bands like that where the lead singer is so terrible but at the same time its just heavenly. The Mountain Goats, The Front Bottoms, Bright Eyes, and BCNR just to name a few. I think the music industry excludes women who aren't pitch-perfect, but I need more bands with women who can scream with the same kind of feeling as Isaac Wood because they can't hit a single note but their voices are just filled with unbridled emotion

At this rate Dead Kennedys will become a new hyperfixation