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foodfightnovelization · 8 months

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Every Real-World Brand Mascot in the Movie

Time for another interlude! Cool, huh? Okay, this admittedly isn't super interesting since it's just a game of "spot the cameo" with characters that are already in the movie, but I felt the need to trek my way through and point out just how many brand mascots (that is, ones based on actual grocery store products) we see throughout the movie. I'm aware there's already a list like this on Foodfight's Lost Media Wiki page, but it's slightly inaccurate and anyway, mine has pictures. So let's do this!

(Sidenote: This doesn't include products that appear in the movie but don't have a mascot. For example, we see Crest toothpaste on the shelves as the store closes, but there's no anthropomorphic tubes of toothpaste walking around so I'm not including it)

#1: The Vlasic Stork: Okay so this one is obvious since he's on the DVD cover and all, but he's also the first one we see in the whole movie, at around 1:50!

#2: Mr Clean. Again this one's super obvious and noticeable, I'm just listing all of these for completion's sake. I chose the screenshot of him with sewage on his clothes because I think it's funny.

#3: Mama Celeste. I'm talking about the woman in the foreground in a red dress and a white apron- she just looks like a regular old woman but she's actually the mascot for a bunch of microwavable meals (like Celeste Pizza For One, which a friend of mine says is a very sad meal for very lonely men)

#4: Punchy. Not much to say about this one, but it's Punchy, the mascot for Hawaiian Punch. He has no lines but he DOES perform his signature move of offering someone a drink before punching them in the face, and we all know punching people in the face is tight.

#5: Twinkie The Kid: The mascot for Twinkies, this character appears multiple times throughout the movie, but I'm just including the first time he shows up because it's easier (this is during a crowd scene early on where lots of cameos can be seen)

#6: Spammy. See, I wasn't even aware Spam had a mascot? But apparently they do, and he can be seen here staring right at you, the person reading this! He's basically just a can of Spam with a face and arms.

#7: The Dinty Moore Lumberjack. The mascot for Dinty Moore stew, he can be seen here waving his hands in the air and being stared at by a rabbi. (The rabbi in question is called Rabbi Kayman in case anyone's wondering, he's an original character created for the movie and is the mascot for a brand of granola bars and cookies. God, I know way too much about this movie)

#8 and #9: Tootsie Roll Owl and Tootsie Roll Man. In the background of the same scene, we can see these two characters. The owl, famous for the "How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?" commercials, and a walking Tootsie Roll (on the right) who Google tells me is just called the Tootsie Roll Man.

#10: The California Raisins. One of the more well-known mascots in the movie, in the scene pictured above they're in the Copabanana singing a cover of "I Heard it Through The Grapevine" which they often sang in commercials back in the 80s. They're also one of the only real-world brand mascots from the movie to actually get tie-in merchandise, as there was a plush released of one of them alongside all the original characters from the movie. (The only other real-world mascot to get a plush, or indeed any form of merchandise, was Charlie The Tuna. Speaking of...)

#11: Charlie The Tuna. The mascot for Starkist Tuna, he's notable for being one of the few brand mascots in the movie to actually get any dialogue. I like his Brooklyn accent, and as mentioned above he's one of only two real-world mascots to get any tie-in merchandise released. There were a whole line of plush toys released- Dex Dogtective, Daredevil Dan (I have this one!), Maximilius Moose, Cheasel the Weasel, Polar Penguin, a California Raisin, and Charlie the Tuna. He's also on the DVD cover! So Charlie the Tuna must be quite the star, getting his own plush and everything... either that or tuna companies typically don't get the chance to sell merchandise based around their canned fish mascot and jumped at the chance.

#12: Mrs Buttersworth. One of the only other brand mascots to get any dialogue, she throws pancakes at the Brand X army at one point and spills a glass of juice on Mr Clean. You have to wonder, with only three or four of these (relatively) popular characters getting speaking roles, if more of them had dialogue but it was cut before the movie was released. Mr Clean is credited as having a voice actor but never talks in the movie. Makes you think, right?

#13: Energizer Bunny. This one is a real "blink and you'll miss it" type cameo in the USDA meeting scene, but this is undoubtedly the Energizer Bunny. (Energizer Batteries also feature in a scene in the real-world grocery store)

#14: Mr Bubble. The mascot for a somewhat obscure brand of bubble bath, Mr Bubble appears multiple times throughout the movie but never does anything particularly noteworthy.

#15: Kid Cuisine Penguin. Another "blink and you'll miss it" cameo, the Kid Cuisine Penguin shows up in a few scenes, but he's really hard to spot- if you weren't actively looking, you'd have no idea he was in this at all. It's almost like they didn't want you to see him?

#16: Chef Boyardee. He shows up a few times at various points in the movie, and they've made sure to put the Chef Boyardee logo right on the front of his uniform, which is useful because otherwise he could easily just be mistaken for a regular nondescript chef.

#17: Hungry-Man. We're really getting into the pits of the cameos now. Hungry-Man is a brand of frozen dinners... but they don't have a mascot. I looked it up, they definitely don't and they never have. So for this movie they've created their own mascot for Hungry-Man by just taking a regular-looking guy and slapping a shirt that says "Hungry-Man" on him. The only interesting thing about this is it implies that in the world of Foodfight!, even products without mascots in the real world still have their own Ike in the Marketropolis.

#18: Duncan Hines. Okay, last one now. I watched this movie a BUNCH and I had idea who this was supposed to be, only to spot a logo on his apron right towards the end and realize this is supposed to be Duncan Hines. He doesn't look anything like the real-life Duncan Hines (a restaurant critic who definitely does not have a mustache) and as far as I know Duncan Hines cake mix doesn't HAVE a mascot. So for this movie I guess they just...created a mascot that looks nothing like the real-world man the company is named after? Okay, FINE.

So all in all that makes 18 cameos from 18 different brand mascots...in a previous post I said there were around 15 and that I'd have to pore through and catalogue them all at some point. And here I am! My guess was surprisingly accurate. A lot of these are so obscure and so easy to miss though, that I'd say they barely even count as cameos. The only notable ones are ones that get a shot specifically focused on them or a line of dialogue, like Charlie Tuna, Twinkie The Kid, Mrs Buttersworth and the Vlasic Stork. It makes sense they're the ones featured on the DVD cover and poster- they're the most recognizable of all these and some of the only real-world mascots with an actual role in the plot.

Sidenote: This particular variation of the DVD cover/poster (the same art is used for both) lists a bunch of cameos featured in the movie. Charlie Tuna, the Vlasic Stork, Twinkie the Kid, Mr Clean, Mrs Buttersworth, Hawaiian Punchy, California Raisins, Chef Boyardee and...Chiquita Banana? But the Chiquita Banana lady isn't in this movie at all! I should know, I just spent way too long going through every last second of it trying to pick out all the cameos. So either she was removed very late into production, or whoever wrote the text for this poster just got confused and made a mistake. I genuinely have no idea which though? The mystery of this movie really never ends...

#foodfight #dex dogtective #mr clean #charlie the tuna #twinkie the kid #spam #chef boyardee #tootsie roll #interlude

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dotster001 · 1 year

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For Tuna

Summary:Grim does some interviews to find the perfect sugar dad for him you gn!reader x all boys in one way or another.

A/N:I haven't unpacked my tag list yet, so hopefully this is everyone!

Part Two Part Three choose your ending...

"Grim, we can't afford the bougie tuna. Put it back."

You'd missed it before when you were loading your basket at Sam's shop, but Grim had snuck in the expensive tuna. Now you were at the counter, trying to hide your embarrassment as you told Grim to put it back. Sam gave you a sympathetic smile, but still. You didn't need to add his pity to your plate of worries.

"Prefect, don't worry about it. I can take care of it."

You jumped. You hadn't realized Ruggie had lined up behind you with his own basket full of stuff.

"Yeah! Let Ruggie-"

"I couldn't do that, Ruggie, but thanks for the offer."

Ruggie grinned, "oh please, it's on Leona. He said I could get whatever I want as long as I come back with his energy drinks."

You made an unconvinced face, and Ruggie gave a playful wink.

"Trust me, your tuna won't even make a dent in his wallet. I could pay for your entire load, and still be able to pay off my student loans. In fact," he slapped down Leona's wallet, "Sam, add Y/N's groceries to mine, I'll take care of it."

Before you could protest further, Sam was ringing you both up.

And then Grim got an idea. A terribly, wonderful, awful idea.

"There, all settled. Plus now you can afford to fix your windows this month, or…." He looked at the cash in your hand, "well you can fix one window at least. And don't feel too bad for Leona. Eat the rich and what not," Ruggie patted your back comfortingly then left with his groceries.

"C'mon Grimmy, let's go," you said with a heavy sigh.

"Actually, I have something to do, Henchhuman. You go on home, I'll see ya later."

"Okay, but if you need me…."

"I'll be okay! Geeze you get so anxious without the great Grim. It's embarrassing."

You rolled your eyes and left. You would be so proud of him once he had finished though. He was excited already.

Heartslaybul Dorm….

"Mr. Rosehearts. Thank you for meeting with me."

Grim primly took out his pen and began to scribble on a clipboard.

"I didn't meet with you. You barged into my office," Riddle said, his arms crossed along his chest.

"I think you will find this meeting beneficial. It pertains to Y/N L/N."

Riddle relaxed a little, and raised a single curious eyebrow.

"You see, It has come to my attention, that Y/N and I do not have the funds to live comfortably. In fact, Y/N is practically starving to death! It has also come to my attention that you harbor some feelings for the prefect, and are in possession of a great deal of funds. Now," Grim dramatically looked up at Riddle, who's face was a shade of dark red. "How do you intend to provide for Y/N?"

Riddle opened his mouth, and Grim prepared himself for the worst, but…

"Wait, Y/N's on the market?!?!!"

Grim turned over his shoulder just in time to see Cater run in, tea tray in hand.

"He's only taking applications from rich people."

"Not a concern, housewarden!" Cater cleared his throat. "Hi, I'm Cater Diamond, and my dad is a banker."

"Oh!" Grim made a note on his paper. Riddle stood up abruptly.

"You only talk to your family on holidays, I wouldn't call that a solid source of income-"

"Yes but I'm a people pleaser, so I'll probably follow in his footsteps. So I will also have a banker's salary."

Riddle turned to Grim in a panic.

"I'm going to be a doctor!"

"Oh!" Scribble scribble.

"Oh please!" Cater rolled his eyes before conspiratorially leaning into Grim. "We both know Riddle. He'll work long shifts, day in and day out, and he'll never come home. Meaning poor Y/N will be trapped in a lonely loveless marriage. Meanwhile, I'll work my nine to five, and be home in time to gift you tuna, and keep Y/N warm at night."

"You think Grim cares about that?" Riddle shoved Cater out of the way. "I'll make time for Y/N. Plus my salary will provide double the tuna for you."

"What's all the yelling about?" Trey entered the room, followed by Ace and Deuce.

"Don't look at them, those three are poor as fuck. I mean a baker? Blech, disgusting," Cater apologetically smiled at Trey. "No offense."

"What?" Trey said, feeling more confused than he ever had been.

Grim clicked his pen closed.

"Thank you for your time. I have more interviews to conduct, but I will be in contact if you get through to the second round."

He scampered out of the room as Riddle and Cater nodded after him.

Savannaclaw Dorm….

Grim sat at the foot of Leona's bed as he tapped his chin thoughtfully.

"How can I provide for Y/N, huh? You mean the little demonstration Ruggie gave this morning wasn't enough?"

Grim tapped the pen impatiently against the clipboard.

"Mr. Kingscholar, it is important that you participate fully, or I will remove you from the list entirely."

Leona groaned.

"I receive a….certain amount of, shall we say, an allowance."

"And how much can I expect from that? I have a lot of people to interview. Please don't waste my time."

Leona looked over at Ruggie, who was folding laundry, then gestured Grim closer, before whispering a number into his ear.

Grim gasped, then hastily scribbled something onto his clipboard.

"We will be in contact with you when the second round of interviews begins." Grim stood up and hopped off the bed.

"Ruggie," Leona snapped, "Ensure my future relative makes it out of here safely. Let no one stop you."

Ruggie nodded in understanding as he escorted a proud looking Grim out.

Once they were halfway through the dorm, Ruggie began to speak.

"Leona has promised me a job with an excellent salary once I graduate. Just sayin."

"Won't he just take back the job if he finds out you're competing with him?"

Ruggie rolled his eyes, "Nevermind."

Jack left his room, and noticed the two of them, and began to walk towards them.

"Jack will make you get a job if you pick him," Ruggie whispered hastily. Grim hissed and sprinted the rest of the way out of the dorm.

"What's wrong with Grim?" Jack asked.

"Shi hi hi who knows?"

As Grim made his way to his second location, he was picked up by the scruff of his neck.

"Hey! What's the big idea?!?!?"

"Aw little sealie you're so cute!"

Grim stiffened.

"Fu fu fu," Jade laughed next to him. "our boss would like to have a word with you."

Grim gulped.

Octavinelle Dorm….

"Thank you for agreeing to see me," Azul said smugly.

"I didn't. Your scary twins picked me up and dragged me here."

"You see," Azul pushed his glasses up his nose, expertly ignoring Grim, "We got word that you were interviewing potential candidates for Y/N's future husband. I prepared some charts for you."

Azul pulled out several charts. Grim understood exactly zero of them. But he nodded thoughtfully and pretended to make a note on his clipboard.

"As you can see, my income is projected to continually go up until retirement. Plus my assets will continue to be of value, and my investments will be bringing in money for many years to come. I can safely say, money is no object. Plus, I am an excellent cook. You will never have to eat poor person's tuna ever again."

Grim made a real note this time just as the twins roughly turned his chair around.

"Now that Azul has had his turn, we would like to give our pitch," Jade said with an eerie grin.

"You see, our parents run a certain…. organization," Floyd and Jade shared a grin before turning to Grim again. "Jade and I are the sole inheritors of this empire when they pass. Just keep that in mind."

"Also, people who oppose this organization have a tendency to, shall we say, disappear."

Grim shivered as he made a skull and crossbones picture on his clipboard.

"Awesome. Great. I'll be taking Grim now…."

"Sea Snake!" Floyd shouted, wrapping his arms around Jamil, who had silently snuck into the room.

"Let go," Jamil hissed, wriggling away from Floyd. "Give me the cat."

"Aw, but we were playing with him…."

"It's alright Floyd. I think the three of us have made our point quite clear," Jade hummed, before the octotrio shared a laugh.

Jamil rolled his eyes before carefully picking up Grim.

Scarabia Dorm….

"Look, Kalim isn't going to brag for himself so I thought I'd bring you here and remind you that this entire dorm was funded by his family. And he will be inheriting said funds."

Grim nodded and made a note.

"What about you? I mean, I already know you aren't getting picked cause, well, " Grim pointedly looked him up and down. "But the other broke losers have tried to participate."

Jamil leaned down and gave a dark smile.

"I don't need money to win over Y/N," eyes flashing red as he spoke.

"Monsieur Fuzzball!"

Grim and Jamil both groaned. It only took two seconds for him to be scooped up by the hunter.

"Non, non, do not struggle. I only wish to prove myself as a proper caretaker!"

Pomefiore Dorm…

Grim had never been so pampered, well fed, and relaxed in his entire life. Rook had provided snacks galore, given Grim the full on spa treatment, brushed out his fur, and was now massaging his sore kitty back.

"Monsieur Fuzzball, doesn't this feel wonderful?"

Grim nodded as Rook continued his massage.

"Just think, you could have this everyday!"

Grim groaned happily as Rook hit a tough knot.

Suddenly, Rook's voice was directly in his ear.

"All you have to do is give me the Trickster."

In that moment, Grim knew he would sell you for this life without a second thought.

But before he could do that…

"For heaven's sake I told you to find Epel, not this rodent!"

Rook immediately stopped the massage, to turn to his Queen.

"Roi du poison! I was simply-"

"Spare me," Vil snapped, before handing a struggling Epel over to Rook. He then reached into his pocket and pulled out a small card, gracefully handing it to Grim between two fingers.

"I believe you are aware of my financial situation, but should you have questions, you can reach my manager on that card."

Then he left the room with a flourish, and the lingering scent of apple blossoms.

"You know I am willing to share the trickster with you," Rook whispered to Vil in the hallway.

"Ew," Epel groaned.

"As if I'd ever share," Vil smirked.

Outside the Ignihyde Dorm…

Ortho stood next to the tablet, holding Grin up so he could see what it said.

"So as you can see from my bank account," Idia's voice said from the tablet, "Money is not and never will be an issue."

"It all looks good," Grim muttered as he made a note, "but I have to say it's a red flag that you couldn't come here in person…"

"Hey! Big brother is just busy with his experiment!"

"Yeah, exactly, thank you Ortho, for being the only one who appreciates genius. In fact this conversation is over. If he doesn't get it, then that's his loss. Ditch the noob, Ortho!" And the tablet floated back into the dorm.

Ortho gently set Grim down. "Look, big brother gets nervous around the prefect, that's all. But I think they'd make a great couple."

He gently patted Grim's head, then floated back in. Grim sighed, made a note about how Idia was a package deal, then continued to the final dorm.

Diasomnia Dorm…

"Small kitten, I am to be king of a country. Not only that, but I have spent centuries curating my hoard. Our nest will be always warm, and my perfect child of man will want for nothing," Malleus finished with a smug grin, as he leaned back in his throne. Then he sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Now you three can make your offers, or whatever."

"Me next! Me next!" Lilia said, cradling Grim like a baby. "I'm not as young as I look, and am on the best of terms with the queen and future king. I also have a great fortune built up! Kay, who's next?"

Silver timidly raised his hand.

"I just want to say, what about what Y/N wants? What if Y/N doesn't like any of us? What if Y/N doesn't even want to get married in the end? Or maybe they'll be just as happy with or without money?"

There was a long pause. Then…

"Silver's father is loaded and will do anything to see his children married and happy!"

"Fa-Lilia!" Silver hid his face in his hands in embarrassment.

"Same with Sebek. And his dad's a dentist!"

For once Sebek had nothing to say.

"Excellent, this looks very promising for you four," Grim nodded scribbling his final notes, "Now to-"

"GRIM!"

Uh oh. He turned around and saw you storming in.

"Child of man!"

"Save it Mal Mal! I'm here for my rat," You scooped up Grim, placing him under your arm as you left the room.

"When will we hear about the second round of interviews?" Lilia giggled.

You answered by flipping them the middle finger without looking back.

The Hallway….

"What the hell, Grim? I'm not for sale!"

"I'm not selling you! I'm just trying to get you provided for!"

"Please! This is about tuna and you know it!"

"Who even told you?"

"Jack called me about an-"

"Ah! Prefect!"

You and Grim groaned as you heard Crowley call to you both.

"Yes, headmage?" You asked through gritted teeth. You turned and saw Crewel was with him….wearing a bigger coat than normal.

"That coat looks so soft," Grim muttered.

"Yeah," you whispered back. "Wait, headmage, what do you need?"

"I heard your current allowance is no longer sufficient," he gently traced your jawline, settling below your chin, tapping up against it thoughtfully. "How does a little extra sound?"

You nodded dumbly.

"Good good, I'm too generous, I know," he hummed and walked off.

Before Crewel followed him, he smirked and patted the top of your head.

"Good pup."

He stalked off. You stood frozen for a moment. Grim smirked up at you.

"You know, they look like they…."

"You keep that thought to yourself, Grim."

....

Tag list-@shytastemakerthing @stygianoir @leonia0 @lleoll @eccedentesiast-sapphic

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