Tumgik
#maybe i am just trans idk this shit is confusing
Text
I think I might Be A Girl, Or Something Like That
20 notes · View notes
fardf150 · 3 months
Text
ig my problem is that when ppl who ive never spoken to who dont and will never have a reason to refer to me ask my pronouns it feels too much like the "are you a boy or girl" question. like im cool when theyre asking everybody bc they plan on knowing and talking to all of us. but when they approach me and only me and i dont know them it's like Oh youre just uncomfortable with the fact that i confuse you and you need to be able to classify me
#also it's always cis ppl who do this. lol#ik they dont mean it like that and ik they think theyre being Progressive and Accepting#but it makes me feel unsafe. tbh. like theyre jst telling me that they Know#and i need to either out myself or lie and misgender myself#kind of why i dont tell anyone unless weve spoken before and they ask#much more comfortable to have plausable deniability while not rly forcing myself into the closet#i present the way i do for Me not so you can come up and say 'hey youre confusing and weird what should i call you'#like leave me aloneeee#and it's kind of insulting bc im as much a butch girl as i am a trans guy and it feels like i cant rly be that first one anymore??#like i Am trans but not every percieved girl who isnt feminine is and same with nonmasculine percieved boys#and unless that person tells you they are or someone who knows the person refers to that person that way then you shouldnt assume#idk. like it feels too close to those 'transvestigators.' even with the best intentions why are you looking so close?#like my cis dad actually made a rly good point abt it once#he was @ an orientation when he went back to college and everybody had to write their pronouns on their name tag#and obv he had the whole Old Cis Dude thing of 'im a dude cant u tell'#but also he was like 'why do you need to talk about me. when im talking to you my pronouns are you/yours and i/me'#like yeah!! why ARE you talking about me???#teachers i kind of get bc sometimes when bringing up a point someone made or saying whos in a group they use the 3rd person#but fucking Stacy sitting behind me in chemistry or some shit doesnt need to know#if u rly need to refer to me idk maybe ask what my name is??? or just say 'that person.' it's not hard.#like this last bit is just a Me thing bc both r technically correct. but id rather have someone assume one way or the other#They'ing me w/o me telling u to when u dont do that to other ppl might as well be outing me w/o us ever speaking#like i dont like being theyed for other reasons and generally i do think it's one of the more respectful options if you dont know someone#but dont!!! only refer to visibly trans/gnc ppl that way!! ur not being nice and depending on the place u cld even be putting us in danger#fred.txt
0 notes
transboysokka · 9 months
Text
Chris watches Howl’s Moving Castle for the first time
* Another one I’ve heard mentioned a lot and know nothing about
* HOLY SHIT GIANT MOVING CASTLE?? idk what I was expecting
* Oh, so Howl’s a bad guy?? omg is he a werewolf I s2g if he’s a werewolf named howl…
* Claiming Sophie on behalf of the Trans Community
* Oh no is that him why is he dressed like some anime guy, he reminds me of the beast in beauty and the beast after he turns human. Is this a beauty and the beast adaptation??
* Don’t let him seduce u Sophie be strong!!!
* I do love the wild fantasy elements of all of these movies, and this one feels like it’s gonna do some worldbuilding. Into it.
* What is with these movies and creepy old ladies?
* NO THATS SOPHIE WTF
* I do think maybe I have a weird phobia of old people? Wild way to find out
* Jesus Christ I just know that scarecrow is alive
* Oh maybe not
* JESUS
* Aw he’s so sweet
* This studio loves to animate flying things and old ladies. But hey, this is the first one I’ve seen that doesn’t start with someone moving somewhere new, so we’ve got that going for us
* Lmao the scarecrow did bring her a house
* This castle freaks me tf out and I haven’t even seen inside. Real Baba Yaga energy
* Bye Turnip, what a cutie
* Okay so the fire is a cute lil guy
* Magic door? Into it. So where is she really and why is it so Cottagecore
* “Calcifer said I could come in” “I did not!”
* That bacon looks so good and I don’t even eat bacon
* I love the idea of something being built into a spell to keep you from telling anyone about it
* I love calcifer and I love Sophie’s dynamic with him
* Turnip is back, yay!!
* I bet he’s under a curse too
* I wonder if he’s the missing prince!!
* I could probably paint that lake
* DONT LIKE THE WEIRD FLYING HOWL BIRD WTF
* I’m really intrigued by him as a character though
* omg that’s Christian bales voice as howl lmao no wonder these dubs are so uncharacteristically good
* omg I’m looking at the English cast kw this SLAPS
* goddamn am I having gay thoughts about a weird anime guy noooo
* I’m crying why does howl have to be such an ugly dog
* how does the Lauren Bacall witch fit in that little carriage thing if she’s so huge, I swear this is one of the funniest movies I’ve seen in a long timd
* ok but I still don’t really get why Sophie had the spell cast on her in the first place, she wasn’t bothering nobody before
* I’ve gotten some antisemitic vibes from characters in other ghibli movies so far and I’m not a huge fan of the fatphobia with the villain, I just gotta say
* Lmao the dog isn’t even howl?
* wait why tf does the castle have a mouth
* why is the bad witch tagging along dump her ass
* So Sophie is young when she sleeps? I don’t get that
* Ok…. So she’s just…. Young again?
* Creepy?? Toy cave??
* Wtf why are these movies so confusing
* I might be imagining it but Sophie does seem to be gradually getting younger
* I love how gung-ho Howl is about his family and his house. Love that in a man.
* Found family themes just Get Me, u know?
* On one hand I don’t Get What’s Happening with the war, but also… I Get this movie
* Also still don’t get the aging and de-aging and I’m not sure if it’s only supposed to be metaphorical or what
* So… why did he eat her hair??
* I gotta say that I love that the only sound the ugly dog makes is us a dry cough
* Maybe the dog is called heen bc he has chicken feet and heen is like hen
* DONT EAT THAT GLOWING ORB HOWL
* yeah I have no idea what the fuck is going on right now
* Wtf howl is just… right there?
* Why was his heart even gone in the first place? Seems like he had it the whole time anyway. Did he know calcifer had it? Like I really don’t get any of that
* TURNIP IS THE PRINCE I CALLED IT
* Lol why is Sophie his true love
* And now they’re just gonna end the war???
Okay that was definitely more fun than any of the other ones I’ve seen so far. CONFUSING AS FUCK like I don’t get it at all but it was really fun. Really funny, with GREAT characters, and I was loved Billy Crystal Fire Guy, so glad I happened to watch the dub.
Also I can’t explain it, but this one is just For The Gays
I’ll watch Princess Mononoke next
23 notes · View notes
variousqueerthings · 6 months
Note
i went and read through all the scorecards and commentary you’ve written so far, and i just have to comment that i think you’ll have a much better time rewatching twelve’s era - it’s got its own problems, of course, but it’s such a breath of fresh air. i think m*ffat actually took some of people’s biggest criticisms of s5-7 to heart - the hamfisted sexiness is toned way down, and he did away with the whole “the doctor is the center of the universe and the most specialest guy ever” angle almost entirely. honestly, i almost have a hard time believing both eras were written by the same person.
hahaaa thank you, and idk why the below got so long, when your ask was relatively simple, blame it on the hyperfixation!
I acknowledge I tend to write m*ffat (mainly because im not trying to put stuff in tags to be a buzzkill but also as a joke about censoring him), but I do think he got... better
in the sense that he was overall less sexist and more character-driven later on and seems to have really run with a lot of what people wanted set up in terms of genderbending Timelords and queer lead characters, although I am finding s6 has some really good stuff... not.... his episodes so much lol...... but I'm liking it more than s5 which runs contrary with my assumptions/memory of his era, which is pleasantly surprising
I don't think he's egregious in the way writers like, say, Joss Whedon were, I've not heard stories of him being an asshole on set (except for that one story about him throwing a hissyfit about not getting the horse through the mirror in GitF back in s2), which may just be me missing stuff, so can let me know, BUT... nothing I know of. and while he's said some... Highly Dubious Shit About Women Especially and also asexuality, I genuinely think he's been working on some of those biases and fucking nonsense
we went from the Doctor kissing a lesbian without her consent to Bill Potts (who has some flaws -- the fat joke I've been seeing mentioned on Tumbls, the somewhat off-centre flirtation with the one-night stand she doesn't get to have that seems more like it comes from girl-on-girl porn than like a way lesbians might speak with one another)
from writing Rants about the dullness of asexuality that assumed a cis- and heteronormative perspective of the Doctor (he's a bloke of course he'd want to have sex was a lot of the Vibes of it) to in a "confused but got some of the spirit" writing about how the Doctor wouldn't understand human definitions of sexuality and monogamous relationship structures (there's a post about that somewhere in the depths of my blog @fabiansociety made some excellent points)
from describing the original first casting for Amy as "wee and dumpy" to... well, actually can we have some clarification there sir, also the shit you said about Karen Gillen basically just being cast because she was hot (I'm not saying I am super Yay Moffat after all), but at least toning down the sexy sexy talk on the show from what you say!
also maybe a smallish thing, and idk how much power he had and and and, buuut I appreciate how he went from the way he talked in GiTF about how Reinette was "worthy" of the Doctor because she was cultured and educated and whatnot... when Rose is literally the companion of the season and semi-textually Created Ten (regardless of youknow, reads of the relationship and all that, definitely important to the narrative and the Doctor), to having Rose appear as The Bad Wolf in the 50th anniversary special... haunting the naaarrative baybey
and I remember feeling like "Missy" when introduced was just a rehash of River Song rehash of Irene Adler (or whatever way around those characters existed) but then Gomez is actually amazing as The Master, to the point that she's the Number One thing I remember from that era of the show
and he's not an asshole about trans people, which, low bar perhaps, but not in this flipping country, especially not saying so out loud, which, like... Doctor Who is a big deal in this country and RTD is obviously a big ol' queer who's been yelling from the rooftops from Day One, but to not just have it be him, to have a cultural institution firmly in our corner, it's good feeling-wise, and Moffat is a part of that too
and what you're saying, which I cannot quite remember the details of but will eventually reach, the pivot from how the Doctor is portrayed in the Eleven arc vs the Twelve arc, and what the core of that story is, and the glory of Capaldi!
the limitations of this praise then come in the fact that he was learning this stuff while running two of the biggest British institutions, a version of Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Who, and so the above Things that he was a dick about, alongside the mocking of fandom during Sherlock and the weird "queer but not queer" stuff with Sherlock/Watson (look, the fucking... BBC marketed it through the lens of a ship, and then there was a whole idk... campaign to make fandom seem weird and over-invested, and then of course Sherlock actually sucked as a show for so many reasons...) means that he's managed to be a prat in real time and it's meant that what should have been fun engagement in storytelling wasn't so much for many of us wincing through the shit he was saying and writing in his shows
... that time he was like "people are accusing me of being sexist, but I love strong, sexually confident women who can step on me, and having a dominatrix kink that I'm projecting onto my female characters onscreen is the opposite of sexism actually Check Mate" (that paraphrasing was mean, sorry not sorry, but also.... I could find the quote or just a handful of handy videos that have aaaaalll of the quotes... because they were happening.... in national newspapers and in interviews and panels and twitter and.... like.... not in private... there's more I'm vaguely remembering but not sure enough to just throw out there, so yeah... but he did not shut up!)
also I will never think he's a good writer so much as Very good at thinking up cool concepts that others might be able to run with or work with him on, and he should never ever be left to his own devices and encouraged to do whatever he wants (... Sherlock..... Jekyll.... from what I've heard, Inside Man....) AND I think generally and hope that RTD2 is going to be about heralding in the next gen of creators, including perhaps... a future showrunner who didn't grow up when Classic!Who was in its infancy (I don't mean that as a diss, I just mean that we've had three of those showrunners so far), and perchance isn't a cis man, because I think a lot of cool shit that could have been better might have been if moffat wasn't learning the ABC's of third wave feminism at the same time
Gosh and he's the least sexy writer I have ever come across... maybe not ever, but considering how confident he was being about allosexual alloromantic Doctor, that man is as sexy as getting slapped by a wet fish (unless you're into that, in which case insert something else here)
ALL OF THIS TO SAY... yeah, I'm excited for Twelve. and I'm enjoying Eleven more by watching the way I'm watching and being able to set criteria for worse and for better!
9 notes · View notes
Note
ah, the radfem blogs.
god, I love familiarizing myself with your guys rhetoric. (Or should I say girls??) (are there any male radfems???) (is it like only women??? Because I’m literally a feminist times 7, but idk what’s going on here.)
I try and exist, and my trans moots and friends and you guys just appear out of the wood work and just be so awful for literally no reason.
like, you guys say trans people are all awful. I’m really saddened by that because that’s a VERY big generalization, you’ve met Trans people in real life before?
like wow, that’s actually crazy. I’ve met what 50+? trans people both irl and online, and they have been the sweetest and also the most supportive people I’ve ever known.
just in life and shit.
and I’m a woman, and I don’t understand your ideals.
trans people have been fighting with us in All gay rights things, it’s literally called LGBT.
like, I agree there’s shit tons of absolutely despicable men out there.
and I agree there’s absolutely despicable trans people too, but that’s life??
anyone and everyone can be despicable, and whatever. Evil isn’t limited by race or gender, evil is just evil.
Am I calling you evil??? Fuck no!
but I’m genuinely confused to why you think trans people are invalids.
what’s the reason? You personally were attacked by literally all trans people for something??? Idk (wo)man
Also am I the only person who’s unsettled by women being called females? Because that’s just ew.
we literally have words in not only English but literally every language ever for women. And just why being referred to females better?
it feels so dehumanizing, I’m a woman. Not a female, and trans women are women.
yeah, I know. Pull out the whatever, but also being referred to male is dehumanizing too.
WE LITERALLY HAVE WORDS for it, idk why we all want to go and use dehumanizing language on both sides.
I’m so confused why you think trans people are “holding themselves hostage to have surgery, because they’ll kill themselves” because that is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard in my entire life, more ridiculous then pigs flying.
who said that, literally I want you to quote more than 20 trans people that have said that. Not radfem blogs, not terf anything.
just actual trans people, and if you can’t find anything! Then great!
“Why are trans suicide rates so high?” Um, do.. do you think transphobia literally doesn’t exist.. literally your contributing to it my guy (girl).
if I can speak to not only 50+ trans people, and none of them literally ever has called me names or anything. I think it’s a skill issue, (translation: you’re doing something wrong.) because like how.
I’ve done DEEP research into trans stuff, for literally like 4+ years.
talked to 50+ trans people and their experiences.
and done deep reflection and also talked with trans people about their relationship with gender and all that.
if I can realize that trans people aren’t crazy. (also, being trans btw is not a delusion. A delusion you’re probably thinking of is more like thinking you’re Elvis when you’re a woman. Or thinking you’re princess Diana when you’re a man. And you fit the criteria of a delusional disorder or something.)
and are just idk existing then what’s the point, I don’t hate you and I never will.
but just why?
also as someone who’s talked to numerous victims of grooming and of other internet predators.
I’ve literally heard of exactly 1-2 trans groomers, and I’m also like 90% sure they were lying and were men trying to groom trans kids.
I’ve been on the web, and in real life my whole life. (Call me chronically online, but this is literally the only place safe from my parents abuse lolzor)
and I just don’t get it.
maybe we live too different lives to compare, but I just don’t get it.
why are trans people so bad in terf’s/radfem’s eyes?
when they are just your neighbors, cooks, artists, architects, coders, doctors, and scientists.
idk 🤷‍♀️
tell me why?
I don’t know what you actually wanted out of this unfocused rant where you accused me of saying a whole bunch of stuff I never said and you just decided I must believe.
I can’t and won’t argue with this make believe person you’ve projected onto me. If you’re actually interested in what I think and why, ask me specific questions.
I can say that I don’t believe every trans person is bad or a groomer. In fact many trans people are perfectly lovely. I think trans people deserve to live their lives free of discrimination and violence and like all people deserve the right to self expression.
Where I disagree with you is how the current trans activism movement is conducting itself, along with concerns about intertwined but broader cultural trends. I believe the current movement is doing more harm than good. To trans people as well as women and the LGB.
If you’re actually interested I’d be happy to explain each and every conclusion I’ve reached and why. But I doubt very much this was a genuine attempt to understand me. It is far more likely this ask was a performance that reinforces your own sense of being “good”. And yet you don’t even have the strength of conviction in these beliefs of yours to attach a name to it. If I really am an evil bigot, you have done nothing brave by sending a long winded anon to someone whose opinions you haven’t even bothered to learn.
12 notes · View notes
oldmemoria · 8 months
Text
i have a lot of unorganized miguel headcanons that float around my brain at times but since i usually think of them at night and forget about them the next morning im just going to continuously update this post probably? anyway here are the ones that i do remember
i will either leave this in my drafts and update it when i want to or ill just edit/reblog with new stuff idk
edit after i stopped typing:
ok its time
fuck you
posts
identity headcanons first, because idk getting those out of the way feel free to get pissed off about these ill just block you 💖
trans man. he/him pronouns. probbably doesnt care if you use gender neutral terms for him because like... why would he, he has a multiverse to stare at
asexual, can't really figure out of i see him as being aromantic as well, i personally just think he's too busy to think about it atm but i dont think hes incapable of it. maybe arospec, like demiro or greyro or smth idk, i just know this mf is asexual.
he is autistic (and probably undiagnosed?) i will die on this hill as if i was a warrior cat defending the sunningrocks i will commit an oakheart fight me on this and i will throw rocks at you and then promptly get crushed by rocks as well (is that warrior cats spoilers um oops sorry)
now to the rest- that i remember- i have not read the comics yet so if some of these are like.. actually canon lmk because that would be really funny
this one might be a hot take but he does not hate miles. he wants to look out for him and definitely either currently regrets or is going to regret what happened in that chase scene. i genuinely doubt he hates any of the spider-gang hes just very, very worried about the multiverse. in his head thats the only way. (i am hoping and pleading that miguel and miles make up somehow, maybe miles doesnt forgive miguel and that totally understandable and would make sense but pLEASE writers i would die if you kept them as being rivals i genuinely would)
he hates Audrey Hepburn, fangoria, harry houdini, AND croquet. he CAN swim, he CAN dance, and he DOES know Karate. he still wont make it though. sorry man.
since hes from the future i dont think he'd be terribly confused by current slang/terms, hed more look at it like we see terms from like... the 80-90s or anything before that as "oh wow people used to say that? huh. interesting."
im going back on a headcanon ive had since i saw the movie im SoRRYYY but he cant curse. from what ive seen from the comics he uses replacements like "shock" and "bithead", thats it. maybe he says fuck on accident or in spanish (he technically kind of does depending on how you see "Ay Coño" being said but thats beside the point).
probably a blue eyes hater idk he just gives me the vibe of saying "jesus christ your eyes are way too blue, get contacts please im begging you stop looking at me" which is probably why him and gwen have so much beef.
i dont give a shit about what the movie says his fangs are not retractable fuck you. (he still has crooked teeth though i will never forget about those <3 )
autism be damned my guy can work a grill 🔥🔥🔥🔥
a lot of people cant really tell if hes pissed or not by his tone sometimes. is this projection? yeah, next question.
he hardly ever sleeps but when he does its like hes dead (at least when its dead quiet, which again, isnt often so he hardly ever gets a good nights sleep). you'd have to use a fucking blowtorch to the face to wake him up.
i also see him as not only having hypersensitive vision but also having elevated senses period. hearing, smell, touch, etc. probably the main reason he sits in the dark with no other noise.
branching off of that he frequently gets migraines of things get to stressful or too loud or if anything is very off about his schedule.
arachnophobe. ha.
cat person.
cat person as in he likes cats not like hes a catboy.. i shouldnt specify that actually that just makes it worse but i will anyway because tumblr hellsite will be tumblr hellsite
he partially likes lego peter because his daughter really liked lego.
ok but like think about it he'd probably be really good at taking legos apart with those claws. like imagine. it'd be nothing for him.
hasnt spoken to gabriel in years. he cant bring himself to reach out and when gabriel does he just doesnt have the energy to try and respond. he has no idea how to, especially now.
this is very specific but he stims a lot with his claws. like extend and retract over and over absentmindedly (mainly because thats what i'd do if i had claws imagine how fun that would be)
he usually bottles up all the emotions that he has, including anger. kind of explains why he lost it in the chase scene in my head because he reached a boiling point. he hates talking to people about his problems.
empanadas are his safe food, also theyre just easy to eat when your mouth is a little funky (i would know i have some fucked up braces theyre great for that 10/10), its mostly just easier on his fangs.
definitely horrible at the whole self are thing. he just forgets, all the time. would forget to breathe if it wasnt involuntary
if you say anything he doesnt particularly like (eg "hey bro are you okay do you wanna talk") he'll just stare at you with his rat eyes like 👁️👁️ until you stopped idk what im saying.
he is a bit touch starved, depending on his mood he'll let people touch him in a friendly (emphasis on friendly. friendly friendly friendly dont take it any other way :/) way.
OH I almost forgot about this one: he hisses. some spiders hiss. so does he. vampire furry energy
he also gets pissed when people call him a vampire so uh... im counting my days oops.
will go out and sit in the rain. (wait would it still rain in the future? is the climate still fucked in his timeline or nah)
like "ah, its water time" and goes out to sit like this:
Tumblr media
Man if only there was a rain filter
that is all i have for now maybe if something else comes up ill reblog with new stuff >:)
14 notes · View notes
thebisexualdogdad · 7 months
Note
hey, sorry if this is invasive - idk how open u are abt gender things these days. but anyway, ive been a fan of ur blog since probably 2019, maybe before? during that time period, i thought i was a transman and found some serious comfort in ur works. in times since, my gender has changed a lot. now, im essentially back to square one - what id like to ask is, how and when did u "know" u were transmasculine? ik u identify now as nonbinary, how did u know that was ur true identity? i identify somewhat with transmasculine non-binary, and id just like ur perspective from ur journey as you've been such an inspiration to me.
thanks,
A
First of all thank you for the kind words and for following me for so long!
And secondly I have no problem talking about these things because I think it's important for us to be open when it comes to identity and the way its fluid and can change, especially with all the de-transistioners on social media who took a complete left turn and are now super anti trans because thier identity changed and think gender affirming care ruined thier life.
So my identity has always been a journey, when I was a kid I never felt like a girl but no one ever told me I didn't have to be one so I spent my entire life confused and not understanding why I didn't fit in with the other girls. When I was in high school it was okay to be gay but there was so much biphobia still rampant that I told myself well I like girls more so that must mean I'm gay because you can't like both. It was when I was 18 and fully understood what it meant to be trans I was like oh shit this why I've always felt this way. I'm trans but again at that time being non binary wasn't as accepted so even though sometimes I felt in the middle ground I must be a boy because you have to be one or the other.
Around 22 is when I learned more about bisexuality and realized I liked everyone and that being bisexual wasn't a bad thing like people wanted me to think. Even though I learned about being non binary years ago it wasn't until this year when I finally stopped to think about my own identity and understood that even though I am definitely on the masculine side of the gender spectrum and not female in anyway, part of me still feels in the middle ground and that I like using they/them pronouns along with he/him so currently transmasculine nonbinary is where im at.
What I'm trying to get at is that it's okay to not understand your identity, for some people it's crystal clear and for some people it's not so clear and takes time while for some like me it's fluid and ever changing which I can't stress enough it's okay for your identity to change during different parts of your life and don't let anyone try to make you feel bad for changing your identity!
If anyone wants to share thier own journey with either thier gender identity or sexuality in my inbox please know its a safe space to do so!
7 notes · View notes
goremet-chef · 9 months
Text
one thing that always confuses me when it comes to gender identity and like. letting my family know that 'hey, i am trans' roight is
i guess i just dont get it? how you can completely value someone on the basis of their gender identity. cuz like. im not my gender identity. im dom. past whether im a guy or a girl, im me. im a person and i like things, i dislike things, etc
i just dont get the whole "ohh woe is me, my daughter is dead now" thing that parents go thru, because like.. isnt there more about me that you liked? maybe in my case, no, since i tend to be pretty closed off from my family, but like..
i have friends and i love my friends. more than anything, i love my friends. i love THEM. as people. i dont care what pronouns they go by, what they identify as. i see them as they are, which is my friends. thats why like.. for me its so fucking EASY to go with different pronouns and name and all that, my older brother came out as trans to me a couple years after i was out and despite knowing him all my life as a different name with different pronouns, i have to very intentionally make sure not to call him by he and by his name in front of my mom cuz hes not out to her yet, ITS A STRUGGLE to revert back to a name that he isnt anymore, you feel me?
it just seems so shallow to me, like.. idk MAYBE it has something to do with my funny autism brain cuz i really just dont get most sort of society role type shit but how does your love for someone stop when they decide to go by a different name? i think thats crazy cuz thats the VERYLIKE. SURFACE LEVEL SHIT and still its somehow too hard for them
ive tried to explain to my mom like. i find it very easy because im able to see the people i love past their gender and their physical appearance and WHATEVER. i see them as them, as their heart their mind their soul. if someone comes out to me and tells me oh i dont feel like a boy right, the first reaction i have is not "oh so you want me to call you a girl? and you want she pronouns?" which seems to be a very common parent response im noticing. my first thought is "okay, my friend is opening up to me about a change in their identity, so my job as a friend is to change how i see them" because its true! its so important in my opinion past like. okay fine ill call you what you wanna be called, like no!!!
i dont want you to call me a boy just cuz you think its what i want, i want you to respect me as a person enough to see that im presenting a change to you, and take it upon yourself to accept that change. i dont wanna be called dom out of obligation. i want them to love me so much that they would have no problem switching what they see me as. because im not just a girl, or a boy. im dominic, im me. im my own person past what you see on the outside. thats the cool part about friends and family is that you get to let them see whats inside and theyre supposed to love you for you
maybe thats not what i get with a lot of my family, but i definitely get it from my friends and im so grateful for that
4 notes · View notes
red-dye40 · 9 months
Text
it’s my fic’s birthday n i just want to take a mome to reflect on this past year of writing my cringe jthm fic because no joke it has been one of the most therapeutic and rewarding things ive ever done for myself so im gonna spill my guts under the cut here in case ur into that sorta thing
no joke i started writing ancillary auxiliary (obvs under a different much dumber name) when i was THIRTEEN. i was perpetually very very scared of and confused by my psychosis—i saw and heard things constantly that no one else did, and no one could explain that to me, which was obviously very isolating and frustrating. jthm made me feel rly normal (like not alone??) and this fic was a way for me to explore and dissect all these things i was processing and experiencing and repressing. i abandoned it like right away because i was a young teen with undiagnosed adhd but im sure it’s still kickin around on deviantart somewhere.
i have struggled w a lot through my years—addiction n subsequent withdrawal, hallucinating nonstop, uhhhh Being Trans In Society, willingly choosing to be an actor bc i am literally insane—and i felt like my brain was only getting sicker, because i never prioritized my health! none of it! but especially not my mental health!
in the isolation of quarantine a couple years ago i had like sooooooo many psychotic episodes, and eventually i admitted myself to a psych ward bc i was so scared and i just wanted to get better finally!
and i did get better! eventually!
it took a lot of hard work, and i was in outpatient for what felt like forever, and i was going to therapy twice a week and trying a bunch of meds and also just experimenting w hormones bc why not. i stopped making art (which truly truly was sometimes the only thing in my life that brought me joy) because the shit i was making was so scary, i just didn’t want to subject myself to that.
eventually i got myself a really amazing job, literally a dream job of mine, and things fell into place, and my job was my whole personality for a while. idk when it happened but sometime last summer i suddenly felt myself really wanting to read jthm again ?? i guess as i was reflecting on all my trauma, and how i used to cope w it as a kid?? but i reread director’s cut and it truly felt like someone unclogged a drain in my head and all this new inspiration and like LOVE for my past self and xir interests just rushed in and it was so exciting!!!!
and i remembered this fic i had started so long ago, and how proud i was of the concept, and i started writing it in my notes app and it got bigger and bigger and i found a little corner on instagram of ppl who liked it (thank u to those of u who are still here rn!!!!! if ur reading this ilysm) and now it’s this! and i love it!
it might just be super self indulgent at the end of the day idk but! i love everything that has come from this fic (and Other Fics i have written 👁️) and i am so grateful to all of u who have read ancaux and enjoyed it and reblogged and left comments like :) thank u so much
there are three (maybe four?) chapters left i literally didn’t anticipate this to go on for so long and i have no idea when it will end but im excited :) and i hope you’ll stick around :) the ending is rly good i think
LOVE U ALL THANKS
4 notes · View notes
Note
I am so sorry if this may sound ignorant (I have been doing online school for about 3 years now and havent really been around many people my age for a while so I don't know if this plays into my question or not)
I have 2 questions
1. I use the pronouns she/her (it's just what I have always been comfortable with) but I prefer to were more masc or boy stereotypical clothing I guess you could say. Now I do like girl clothes but not as much. I think im just confused if it's a body thing or a gender thing because I like masc clothes so much since they just fit my body better I definitely feel more comfortable in them, but I also like to wear fem presenting clothes as well that may be more form fitting. And you know sometimes I want to put on a suit and strut around in it and sometimes I want to put on a dress it just depends.
2. I am very confused about my sexuality lol. I don't think I realized people could even be more than what society had already deemed as normal and around the age I would have probably began to explore my sexuality covid hit and everything went online. (For reference I am about to turn 16 and would have been 13 when the pandemic hit) I feel the same when I see an attractive female as I would an attractive male (this goes for anyone really if I find them attractive I can feel attraction to them, whether it's a platonic, romantic, or sexual attraction genuinely don't know) I also am fine reading sex scenes but whenever people talk about it in person or if I watch it on tv that's when I get uncomfy and I genuinely can't see myself having sex with someone (idk if that will change or not) but im fine with seeing myself being in a relationship and cuddling expressing my love for a person and sometimes kissing (it depends)
I am so sorry that this was sooo long and all over the place my brain is all messy when I don't plan things out before I write or say anything, and you don't have to answer of course this was just me ranting about how I have no clear thoughts as to who I am yet and it feels good to get it off my chest lt even if you don't answer or even see this.
Thank you genuinely it feels good to talk.
No need to apologise!! I’m here for u :] That’s good, I’m glad writing this ask helped you feel better—try and write shit down sometimes, even if it’s just hastily typed into a google doc and immediately deleted. Shit’s magic honestly.
Preferring or liking masculine clothing doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re transgender. Like obviously it’s a possibility but it’s not like, oh I like pants instead of skirts that means I’m a guy!! You could be trans or you could just be a girl who likes different types of clothing.
My advice is like, don’t sweat it too much, and just do what makes you happy. If you like masculine clothing, fucking go for it!!! I’m sure you’ll slay 100%!! If you wanna wear form fitting stuff, go for that too!! Just. Do what makes you feel like yourself, and do what makes you feel happy, don’t worry about labels and am-i-trans-am-i-cis and all that, kay? Just Vibe!!!!!!
I’d suggest you consider mspec labels, which means attraction to multiple genders, labels like bisexual and pansexual, or just plain old bi and pan might be good for you!!
You can look into the asexual spectrum, which is basically all sexualities that aren’t like 100% allosexual (allosexual means like. most of the population and how they experience sexual attraction.)
Yes, attraction can be confusing. And yes, it’s possible the stuff you feel might change. Maybe you’ll feel sexual attraction someday, or maybe you never will!!
But go with what you like *now.* If bi feels good, go for bi! If asexual feels good, go for it. If you wanna change it later, that’s okay!!
I’m gonna give you my standard new shoe advice—yknow when you have rlly shitty old shoes but you’re used to them, and when you get new shoes you’re like wtf these are really weird, but then you eventually realise they’re much more comfy and you were just used to the shitty old ones?
New labels can be kind of like that. So like, if u try a label and it feels Weird, ask yourself if the weird is a “this is the wrong shoe size” weird or a “i need to break this shoe in” weird.
Hope I could help you out!! Sending my love, and I hope you find what makes you feel happy and feel like yourself!! Have an amazing day <333
5 notes · View notes
dogin8 · 1 year
Text
To the TERF anon in my inbox just now
to get this out of the way: Ur mom is in love with me, she loves me for my based opinions
Now, leave me alone, you're literally fucking bonkers or brainwashed, Look up your own shit stop getting your opinions from angry authors on twitter. I know you're responding to one of two posts considering what you mentioned and how your ask was worded. But literally read the posts. I don't mention men in them.
Don't show up in my ask box with your bullshit.
CHANGE YOUR OPINION
I've been out here, researching my shit, taking advice, going outside, talking to people who have identities that would have confused me a couple years ago, and like, idk maybe one day you'll understand that "People should have less rights" is a fucking cartoonishly evil belief to hold, and like. seeing a post that compares your shitty belief system to racism because of this fabricated idea of "The danger of associating with marginalized groups" and immediately responding with "But marginalized groups ARE dangerous" is a REAL bad look. I'm going to tell you this and let you go do your homework here: The idea that allowing Trans people into spaces for their assigned gender would have some sort of intensely dangerous result is completely made up, and proveably false. It is just propaganda.
anyways, go read some famous racist's manifesto (please don't, actually educate yourself, you don't need to understand people but you can still just be respectful of what they tell you about themselves) or something idk what you people do with your spare time.
i am not oppressing you, I am in love with your father, stan sneegsnag
3 notes · View notes
Note
I think you're decontextualizing too much and talking from a privileged point of view. I'm not arguing with the objectivity of what your point is, but it's a very bland flat hill to die on, in my opinion. People can totally agree to disagree, but the whole "good luck living this way" or "it's never gonna happen" is nothing but a shrugging off problems just because they don't belong to you.
Of course trans folks have deeper issues, we've been fighting in a society that, by default, does not accept us and we're forced to explain our very existence on a daily (or whoever cares to, to be honest I dropped that one ball there). So that's why it's important to make people who are coming from said privileged spots (mind, I'm not using the word "privileged" to hop on a high horse and offend anyone) understand how some things are very easy adjustments to make to accommodate minorities. And you don't really need to know/profoundly understand /why/ it's important for them, you can simply trust it is if they say so.
It's like saying "why would I use City money to build a stupid ramp when wheelchair users can struggle a little and learn to climb a 3 inches step" or "why would I stop staring at that person's ass if it's out and it's natural for me to look at it" because you want to be better and it's not that deep.
Yet again, agree to disagree if adding "assigned at birth" is such an inconvenience. No one is word obsessed, but personally speaking I'll bend the usage of my language as much as I can to make sure everyone around me is comfortable and feels safe, I don't care and need to know why.
How am I decontextualizing or talking from a privileged point of view? I mean I suppose I am in that I am not trans? I'll give you that.
Why is my point of view a bland hill to die on but insisting on changing female/male to afab/amab isnt?
No I just truly believe and came to the realistic conclusion it will never happen, not in any of our lifetimes at least. Do you really expect that this is going to become the new normal, in every country and culture? Seriously?
Yeah damn straight Im shrugging it off, I cant help people who are determined to be unhappy over word choice. Its not my problem, as you said. Everyone elses life will go on as normal, only they will be stuck on this and being unhappy, only hurting themselves.
Changing a language is not "very easy adjustment", not at all. I mean clearly, or else all this fighting wouldnt be happening right? And ok, say English changes. What, now every other language in the world has to change? Oh boy, thats going to lead to a lot of confusion and fighting. Sounds kinda problematic too, to insist other cultures and countries have to change their languages to match the more enlightened English. Colonist vibes.
Lets have realistically attainable goals. Lets focus on what really matters- like violent hate crimes against transpeople. People who are sooo passionate about political correctness and word choice should maybe, idk, do something real to help. Volunteer or work to help transpeople. But see they dont actually care about transpeople, they just get off on the self righteousness and false sense of moral superiority.
Its not about understanding why its important to them, I understand that it is. But unfortunately, reality doesnt give a shit about peoples emotions or whats important to them. (and clearly its not ok to disagree, because then you get labeled as a terf or whatever else new acronym...)
If you want to compare it to that, its more like if people in wheelchairs insisted that all stairs should be banned- ramps only- and you cant call them disabled anymore, everyone else is un-disabled. Society will never build itself around to a minority population, and shouldnt because it makes no sense.
Its not about "doing better" or peoples feelings. This is the main difference in thought process I think- some people view it as a moral social issue, some people view it as a issue of reality and logic.
What is a female? What is a male? A woman? A man? Whats the differences between them? Whats the difference between sex and gender? Are trans people actually transsexual or transgender? Is it even possible to be transsexual since you will never have the desired sex's gametes? Can someone be a female man or a male woman? At some point we need some god damn definitions. We cant just make words mean whatever we want them to.
Why not just have females, males, and transfemales and transmales?? Men, women, transmen, transwomen. That makes way more sense. Why would the majority and a whole ass language change to fit the minority? And even with the use of "cis", "trans" is still in use so attaching "cis" is pretty redundant either way!
4 notes · View notes
ideks-on-mars · 2 years
Note
hello i am back with another request !! can you expand on your trans shirabu headcanon bc my period started and i am feeling very not good
I'VE BEEN WAITIN FOR THIS ONE 🤧
I will absolutely drown all of you in my Trans Shirabu hcs, I have had this hc since the minute I saw this little fucker
I love your requests, they give me excuses to scream about my favorite characters 💀
ANYWAYS TRANS SHIRABU HCS LETS GO
- Let's start from the beginning
- It started when he was fairly young
- Seeing his brothers play and have the time of their lives seemed so much fun. But when HE wanted to join them he was told to act like "a lady".
- So from an early age he was like "wtf I don't wanna be a lady this shit sucks" and honestly he's not wrong 💀
- He confronted his older sister on the situation first.
- She listened to him and was pretty understanding. She was a lady. She understood.
- "Well I personally have no idea what to tell you but maybe we could look something up."
- The internet is a wonderful place
- "What is a 'transgender'?" "Idk click the thingy"
- They clicked the thingy.
- Ik I'm not the only one who Googled the " I am gay?" quiz. I know I'm not-
- Kenjirō woke up the next day determined to be a new man.
- Everyone did notice how he was acting a little differently. Wearing different clothes, wanting his hair cut shorter and shorter each time. He'd take matters into his own hands if he didn't get the length he wanted and God forbid that ever happen.
- Local big sister was proud.
- Local big brother and little brother were confused but still like "fuck it, ok".
- Local childhood bestfriend Taichi was like "Ok what's going on"
- "It's nothing!" "I know it's not nothing. You're not even looking at me, you're looking at the ground."
- Kenjirō gave in eventually.
- "Fine. Taichi, I think I'm a boy." "Oh..cool."
( I do not want to hear comments about "Oh he peer pressured him into telling him" like yes. He did. That's what little children do 💀)
- Taichi started calling him K from then on.
- It was very special to Kenjirō and to this day he thinks it was a very big part of his transition.
- By the time he was 13 he had already played it off for such a long time. And his father was on trial for numerous reasons. Everyone in the family knew he was going to prison and they also knew that their family rep would be in tatters. Not that they cared. They just wanted the evil man gone.
- This is when he came out to him mom.
- " Momma?" "Hm?" "I'm a boy." "I know." "You what 😃"
- She continues to go onto a rant on how it was pretty obvious. Kenjirō actually thought it was pretty funny.
- "So you need a new name I'm guessing. What is it?" "Well I was gonna ask you for your opinion."
- She goes on to say that it wasn't her place to say and that she didn't even really have a say in his old name so it didn't affect her much.
- They gave ideas, and they settled on ✨️Kenjirō✨️
- His sister was so so SO proud of him. So was Taichi.
- His brothers were pretty much like "fuck yeah, we got another brother"
- However when school came along and his classmates see one of their peers just randomly turn into a boy, not everyone is gonna be mice about it.
- He got shouted at in the hallway. Some people threw their old papers at him. People are just dicks.
- Luckily, his school was a pretty nice place with good staffing. They provided him a new uniform. And instead of the girls volleyball team, he was put on the boy's volleyball team. The boys team were just glad they had such a good setter. In their eyes he was just like the rest of them. He was a boy, and he was skilled. This is an important aspect to their team and if you were mean to him then they would rain hellfire on you.
- He went to a different middle school than Taichi so when Taichi heard these stories he would be pretty pissed off but hearing that the volleyball team was cool he felt a bit relieved.
- So when Taichi got a Shiratorizawa scholarship, Kenjirō knew they "Yeah, I gotta go there with bestie"
- He got there through the entrance exam, like a king 🙄💅
- And of course, he attended the try outs with Taichi. The mf is just built different.
- Evil coach Washijō already knew about Kenjirō's situation and was highly skeptical. But when it hit him in the face that Kenjirō was not only skilled, but smarter than all these dumbasses running around his court. He realized he was his best bet when it came to good plays. Kenjirō was on board.
- Taichi made it too, wooooo 🥳
- However when it came to changing Kenjirō was like "nah" and changed in the bathroom. He didn't want people to question his binder.
- But he thought it was a little sus how Yamagata was heading towards the bathroom too. 🤨 Yamagata spoke up first.
- "So...where are you headed?" "To the bathroom..to change."
- They stared at each other for a good 5 seconds. Kenjirō just said Yolo and looked around to make sure no one else was around before he whispered
- "I'm trans"
- "BITCH ME TOO!"
- Kenjirō had never been more thankful to have someone in his situation cuz Hayato was not afraid of being open at ALL.
- They regularly borrow essentials from one another. They become close rather quick.
- Hayato keeps his secret for him. He understands better than anyone how it can be.
- Hayato is also a good source of advice too. He's a real one for sure.
- Now, let's talk about the one that should not be named. THE WEEK OF HELL.
- Kenjirō's SUCKS. Like it's out for his throat. He's pretty sure his body wants him to curl up into a ball and cry in the middle of practice.
- He brings pain relief medicine but he always takes it late so he has to wait those 10-15 minutes for it to kick in and they always feel like hours. Like damn could the clock move faster.
- Taichi definitely buys him a heating pad for when he's not at practice or school, so he can feel at ease in the dorms.
- He has his emergency bag (I think we all know what the emergency bag is) and if not then Hayato has his and is happy to cover for him.
- Once he came out to the team he honestly felt a lot better. Like they all understood the struggles he had but at the same time didn't treat him any differently.
- However, when word got out that he was Trans, that's when shit started getting a bit out of hand.
- People wouldn't go crazy but people would be like "Why is he even on the team?" "Is that allowed?" Just little things
- It started getting really bad when dudes would harass him. Things like comments on his body, or telling him that he had such a pretty face. But when he ultimately made it clear that he wanted nothing to do with them is when they would start saying shit like "Oh, he's probably only on the team because he let's the whole squad have a go at him 🙄" that's when it started going downhill.
- People even started to come for Semi because he was replaced by a "fake boy".
- He never let anything show, but some things really did keep him up at night if he's honest.
- But the people who were nice to him really overshadowed that.
- Little things like "Man, you're really brave" or "That must be tough, good for him". Even other kids coming up to him who are questioning themselves and asking him for some advice.
- It's lowkey very special to him.
- As he gets older the more he let's things go and he's really not scared to express himself. He's a boy, he was always a boy, and he will continue on to be a boy.
- He ends up getting top surgery not too long after he graduates from med school. However he doesn't get surgery down there because if he's honest it scares him. (Which is completely ok!)
- He's very happy with his body. He's surrounded by lovely people. And he's just completely content.
- I love him sm 🤧
16 notes · View notes
gay-otlc · 4 days
Note
https://www.tumblr.com/arson-goku/748767908456448000
What exactly is wrong with this post? I’m confused is it just a criticism of the beginning or the whole thing?
If you're asking someone to explain a criticism of a post, I would recommend asking the person who posted said criticism?? Because I had not seen the post you linked until now and I was not really the one criticizing it.
So I can't speak for the op of the post I reblogged but speaking for myself having now seen the full post, I think overall it is a good post. It is absolutely important to talk about medical transandrophobia and the way trans men&mascs who pass as male struggle to access necessary, even lifesaving medical care.
I don't like that the part at the beginning frames it as though that op thinks we're focusing "too much" on non-passing trans men, which is... very much not the case. When people do emphasize non-passing trans men, it's not to erase trans men who do pass, it's to push back on the constant erasure of trans men who don't.
The people who deny that transandrophobia exists/is a problem repeatedly insist that trans men can pass mostly effortlessly ("all they need is a haircut and a hoodie") and can easily access medical transition. So we have to talk about trans men who are in an environment where they can't pass, who physically can't pass, who don't want to pass, who can't access medical transition, who don't want to medically transition, etc in a desperate attempt to get people to recognize that these types of trans men exist, and are suffering, and that their experiences fucking matter and don't deserve to be erased.
(Also in these same discussions I have seen people also talk about how trans men who pass can still be outed, and how trans men who pass can be harassed, assaulted, denied necessary resources or medical care for looking too masculine, so I don't feel that passing trans men are being ignored in any way? Maybe the op of the post you linked is in different circles and doesn't see those same discussions, idk)
The beginning of this post just seems to communicate "I feel as though my struggles as a trans man who passes well don't get acknowledged enough" by saying "because the struggles of trans men who don't pass get acknowledged too much," which again, isn't the case. I don't think that op had bad intentions, but it came off that way.
(Also, in seeing the screenshot of the post's beginning without context, I thought it was going to continue something like "trans men who do pass have all the male privilege but don't want to admit they have male privilege so they keep talking about trans men who don't pass to insist trans men are oppressed because they are whiny mras" or some shit. Which is a take that pisses me off. Knowing the actual full content of the post, I am significantly less pissed off, I think it's a good post overall with a clumsily worded beginning)
1 note · View note
Text
ok this is my blog and im angry and i feel like im gonna explode if i can't voice my opinion, but fuck msp3c l3sbians/g4ys honestly. like why not just say bi or pan or whatever other msp3c word?? and how in the living hell is that even close to being the same as being a t3rf???? maybe there's a fucking reason why men think l3sbians want to sleep with them because fucking idiots call themselves l3sbians when they are bis3xual. like i get sexuality and shit is confusing and "historically it meant something differently!!" or whatever, but honestly people just viewed sexuality differently in the past since it was defined more by your actions than your internal feelings. i just needed to fucking vent bc im going insane seeing this discourse. how tf am i a fucking t3rf if im trans myself and i see trans lesbians as just at much of a lesbian as any cis lesbian??? i fucking know gender is confusing and shit. idk man im just a fucking angry alter who's probably having a breakdown rn from being overstimulated and i need to just learn to touch grass. also any person trying to fucking debate this with me will just be blocked lol. im very mad and i was about to say not nice things, but apparently im being censored by the rest of my system fuck this bs let me say what i want lmfao
0 notes
wodnes--coyotl · 4 months
Text
sometimes when im scared of being too effeminate and 'not passing', I think about all the wonderful gay men of LGBT history's past who were fruity pansy faggots and then i relish in the faggotry i once embraced when i was pre-transition, it would confuse and offend people who saw i was a "woman" and they'd PEARL CLUTCH, "b-b-but you're not a fag!" which was even more insulting but also slightly delightful. now i can lean into it again in a way which is nice. i often miss the boldness and confidence of my pre-T self. a lot of people say testosterone gives them more confidence, and maybe it could have, but transition has coincided with one of the weirdest most codependent times of my life... so for me I have withdrawn into my shell a lot, but I mean, I also moved states twice in two years and covid is still happening and ive been off and on employed and not had the money/resources for shit, so, hell, idk.
i still get misgendered, even on the phone, and a lot of times i forget that when people aggressively card me (im almost 30), it's because they can't tell my age for trans reasons also (and i have baby face and so do a lot of my family), and then they see my un-updated ID and kind of stare at me. this happened recently at a bar were I'm pretty sure the bartender was nb or transfem of some kind (and if she WASN'T well I sure as hell called it lol), and I didn't feel her judging at all, maybe just kinda realizing, but it was pretty funny to me.
Also recently a troll yelled at me that I was worthless because I was an effeminate man and I thought, finally, the iconic trans troll thing that happens where they cant tell, after 16 months, has happened! lmao
like thanks doll now with your validation i can be as cunty as i want
also i love tumblr bc i can still say faggot and shit i am SO tired of being censored, for the love of god, even the other day on reddit a gay man tried to tell me that 'butthurt' was a slur, i was like, it isnt, it never has been, and for the love of god, not only did i never think of what it meant originally lol, ITS AN EQUAL OPPORTUNITY STATE OF BEING...including me bc i often have ibs...
1 note · View note