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foldingfittedsheets · 4 months

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One of my earlier jobs in life was at a little pizza place. I worked there when it was first starting up. It’s the only job I’ve ever been fired from and it was because a new manager came in and cleaned house. Because my state requires a reason to be fired he said I used too much pepperoni. So now on job applications I get to write that I was fired for “excessive use of pepperoni.” Never fails to get a laugh.

Anyway! For this story to make sense I’ve first got to set the stage. This pizza place started out as the Wild West of management but one of the original investors was super committed to work programs through the prison. We hired a ton of ex convicts and they were all, to a one, super hyped on Christianity. Like born again for the sole purpose of lauding Christ with their every breath.

I hadn’t been working there long but I’d definitely noticed the Jesus bug had gone around, and as I’ve never been religious at all I tried to steer clear of the topic for my own safety.

The day our story takes place, I was folding boxes. Anyone whose ever worked pizza can attest, there’s so much box folding. It’s something that happens at every lull, the pizza machine demands box folding on a grand and epic scale.

On my right folding his stack of boxes was a guy wider than he was tall, made of pure muscle, Corey. He was newer on staff, and due to a stutter he didn’t talk much. All I knew about him was that he got hired through the rehabilitation program and had done time.

On my left folding was a tall middle-aged woman who loved to yell at me, Cindy. She and I rubbed each other the wrong way and had nothing in common, leading to a tense working relationship.

We folded boxes in silence. This was really my best case scenario as a quiet Cindy was a Cindy not riding my ass, and Corey intimidated me.

But the weight of the silence grew too much for Cindy, who finally said, “I really want to go to bible school.”

I folded a box. I had less than no idea what bible school even was and I didn’t want to get sucked into a religious topic.

On my right Corey said, “W-why, Cindy?”

“Well, cause I believe what’s in the Bible, but I just don’t know it all.”

He nodded sagely to this.

Cindy continued, “And every time I sit down to read the Bible I get real sleepy. And I know it’s the devil.”

It’s so hard to convey her tone in written format. It was delivered with the emphasis and exasperation of an inevitable inconvenience. Like, I just know it’s the squirrels eating the bird seed.

I froze in place at this pronouncement. My only exposure to Lucifer was Neil Gaiman’s Sandman comics and I was trying to mentally twist into a frame of mind where The Morningstar cared enough about this one middle aged lady expanding her knowledge of the Bible that he followed her around cursing her with sleepiness when she picked it up.

I think I expected Corey to say, “Well that’s silly,” or something to acknowledge what a bizarre thing Cindy had just said.

Instead he said, “Yeah!” In a tone of complete agreement.

I didn’t look up. I tried to keep my face neutral at this development.

But something must have shown. Corey said, “You don’t believe in God?”

I shrugged casually and said, “If I did I wouldn’t talk about it at work.”

“C-cause it’s t-true. If y-you t-ry to r-read the B-bible on unsanctif-fied gr-round the d-devil m-makes you s-sleepy!”

I made a noncommittal sound and fled into the back room.

Over the next week it drove me crazy though. The logic of it wouldn’t leave me alone so finally one day when it was just Corey and I in front, and the restaurant was empty, I said, “Hey man, I have a question.”

He shrugged and listened.

“I really don’t mean this with any disrespect, I just genuinely want to know about the logistics-“

“J-ust ask.”

“Okay, so if Cindy gets tired when she reads any book, is it only the devil making her tired when it’s the Bible?”

His face went purple with fury and he yelled, “F-fuck you!” at my retreating back as I fled once more into the back room.

It will forever remain a mystery.

#ramblies #story #funny #as a caveat I don’t mean this story with any offense if you’re religious #but I think to assume that you’re being targeted specifically by a cosmic entity who rivals god is an insane hubris #the idea of a devil is already wild cause like he punishes bad people in the mythos so it seems like he's committed to people #paying for bad behavior rather than trying to trick them into it? but everyone treats lucifer like a boogey man which is weird to me #ffs foibles

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lilliththefan · 3 months

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Okay, I’m gonna do smthn I have never done before on this platform and that is to toss my hat into my thoughts concerning Crowley. Specifically, about her Fall.

Just how she said “Call it a nebula”, call this little crackhead theory: The Booksnatcher Theory (aka: Stealing Books and what it could mean for Season 3)

[Disclaimer: this is just smthn I cooked up randomly so don’t look at it too closely lol. Also I’m not sure if another person has thought of this as well, I just wanted to look at it on a certain angle teehee]

THAT OUT OF THE WAY!!! Let’s start off with what we know about Crowley’s Fall objectively (and by objectively, I mean what Neil has to say about it)

So it’s canon (confirmed via Neil Gaiman himself) that Crowley isn’t the best source for his experience concerning The Fall. According to Crowley, they Fell for two reasons: asking questions and hanging out with the wrong people.

Another interesting thing Neil noted was that Crowley isn’t as good as he likes to maintain while also not being THAT bad as Heaven portrays him to be. So what does that mean?

It could mean that Crowley did something he hasn’t admitted to doing yet.

Which brings me to the title of this random theory I thought of while drinking some milk tea; what if he snatched a book? This book in particular.

If you can barely read the title, you’ll notice that it has the title of “Nebula” along with some (probably) volume numbers that would help identify the book. It was also noted by Crowley that she “wasn’t the original concept designer but that he worked very closely with Upstairs on it.” As some people have pointed out, this was a habit Crowley also did in Hell: taking credit for an idea that wasn’t technically theirs.

Crossing your fingers like this typically means one is asking for luck, OR more poignantly in this scenario, outright lying to another person but not to God as a way to negate the lie you just said. Other people have noted this gesture as well!

Essentially, the theory goes like this: What if Crowley borrowed the Nebula book without prior knowledge or permission and used it to start the star factory without proper clearance?

That basically meant that Crowley stole a Heavenly document for their own gain and created something without an overseer’s approval. Even if it was to satiate their love and curiosity of stars, it still paints him in a bad light while simultaneously not being “that bad” of an angel.

For this theory, Crowley’s angel identity doesn’t matter tbh, you’re free to explore that in your own headcanons. But what matters for this theory, it mainly hinges on the idea that he stole something and did something out of line. Which isn’t all too out of character for Crowley, as he mentioned pranking the cherubs with Beelzebub and threats of the Book of Life.

SPEAKING OF!!!

This brings me to the next part: Why does it matter if Crowley stole a book?

Because that means books can be stolen. And there is ONE particular Book that is currently a Chekov’s gun waiting to be fired.

NOW LET’S 👏 TALK 👏 THE 👏 METATRON 👏

Metatron overall is a VERY shady character, no surprise here. We know barely anything about the guy, which basically meant us (who are into angelology) had to go off of three main things: (1) he’s the Voice of God, (2) he was once human favored by God, and (3) he’s the Scribe to the Book of Life.

So here’s the thing about point 1 and point 2…

…okay so Metatron doesn’t ACTUALLY talk to God and he was never human in the first place, which means out of everything so far, point 3 is the only thing that still remains as true.

What does that mean, then? It means, in the context of this theory, the Metatron would probably be keeping that Book under lock and key in the best way possible: by controlling any single angel (former or current) that has shown instances of showing interest towards knowledge they shouldn’t have.

Which means that it makes sense to make Crowley Fall, if she has been known to steal books. Aziraphale could easily be put under the Metatron’s control due to conditioning. Hell (heh), even Michael backed down the moment Metatron revealed himself.

But there’s one surprising addition to the growing count of angels (and demon) who have an interest in books and that is Muriel.

Muriel was seen by Metatron as a purveyor of books, expressing excitement and curiosity toward humanity and their culture. That kind of curiosity could be dangerous to Metaton, especially if you consider that Muriel basically now knows a demon who has clearance to certain files.

So, in Metatron’s mind, the probability of Muriel stealing the Book of Life might be probable. Not saying it will happen, but the chance of it happening does exist.

It would be an interesting twist ngl, while also making total sense for Muriel. They’re a scrivener, it’s kinda in their nature to validate documents and books fall under that category. We even see them validate the contract between God and Satan during the events of the Book of Job, so it kinda feels like a normal progression for them; the underdog lowest ranking angel overseeing the most important artifact Heaven has.

Hence why the Metatron probably stationed them down on Earth. Not only as someone to look after the bookshop but also to keep them away from looking into Heaven’s libraries.

All in all, this lil theory hinges on the fact that books are important in the Good Omens-verse, from Agnes Nutter’s book of prophecies to the Book of Life. Which also kinda has some symbolism attached to it: Books contain knowledge, and knowledge is power.

And if Metatron has a monopoly on knowledge, less people would be less inclined to ask questions.

But see, that’s the thing.

The questions will always remain, regardless if you’re an angel or a demon. So now, I end this theory/tirade/meta of mine with my own inquiry: If you have a question no one wishes to reply to, how far will you go to get your answer?

P.S: So you know how the Metatron is the de-facto writer of the Book of Life in this scenario?

…yeah…

#good omens #good omens season 2 #good omens meta #good omens theory #crowley #aziraphale #muriel #metatron #crack treated seriously meets theory #ineffable husbands #aziracrow

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cobragardens · 7 months

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God Is a Creepy-Ass Meta Mfer:

A Good Omens Essay

This essay features fan theory and speculation. DO NOT TAG NEIL GAIMAN IN ANY POST THAT INCLUDES OR REFERENCES THIS ONE.

The rest of this depends on accepting the premise that God's Plan is not always inscrutable in hindsight, i.e., that parts of that Plan can be discerned or identified as such once they have happened, even if the next moves of the Plan and its ultimate Purpose remain ineffable.

If you are willing to accept that premise, then I suggest we can conclude with reasonable certainty that Thesis Statement 1: Aziraphale's act of giving Adam the First Man the flaming sword is part of God's Plan, and so was Eve and Adam eating the Fruit.

The argument for the latter has been in circulation making even the beardiest of old Christian men scratch their heads for centuries, and in Good Omens, Crowley is the first being ever to make it:

The presence of the Tree in the Garden placed by an omnipotent being with literally infinite orchard space and security technology is a clear indication that God intends humans to interact with the Tree and sets humans up in a divine entrapment operation, giving God the opportunity to curse humanity and evict them from the Garden.

Diversion onto Thesis Statement 2 bc the Essayist Got Distracted: This establishes both the Bible and Good Omens as works of literature in the cosmic horror genre (not that Good Omens doesn't do plenty of its own work in so establishing itself).

In both these stories God is a being beyond humanity's understanding, functionally omniscient and omnipotent, who first creates and then interferes with humanity for unknown reasons and who does not necessarily have humanity's best interests in mind at any point. His/er reasoning and objectives for humanity are opaque, and S/he manipulates circumstances to create excuses to do humanity as a species and sometimes specific humans harm.

If you're not already familiar, go read all the shit God curses humans with when Eve and Adam snack on the Tree's Fruit. It's frighteningly cruel, if not outright psychopathic. So is God's behavior the Book of Job, His demand that Abraham sacrifice Isaac, Mosaic Law, and the sacrifice of His/er Son. Human lives are no more significant to God than the lives of ants are to humans. This whole history of Earth? It may not even be about us. Our entire species' history may just be part of the backdrop to something else, like two angels falling in love and reuniting Heaven and Hell, or like raccoons. It could all be about the raccoons. Who knows! All of this is absolutely 100% pure undiluted cosmic horror.

Right, okay, so back to Thesis 1: In Good Omens, Aziraphale's gift to the first man of the flaming sword is an objective God wants. Here's my chain of reasoning:

The Eating of the Fruit and God's punishment were both objectives of God. See above.

2. Once those objectives had been accomplished, humankind would not have survived outside the Garden of Eden without the sword. They literally would not exist at all.

Adam the First has to kill the lion, either to keep it from killing him and Eve or to keep him and Eve from starving. No flaming sword = no humanity.

3. We know "no humanity" is not God's Plan, because--

--God says her Plan is Armageddon and the Second Coming in 6,000 years. So humanity needs to exist for either of those to occur (or for there to be any reason for adventures about averting them to occur). And God does a whole Crucifixion and Resurrection of His/er Son. So God wants humanity around and is even prepared to welcome them back into His/er grace, providing they meet certain conditions.

4. We know God is not displeased about Aziraphale's gift of the sword to humans because God asks Aziraphale about the sword, and Aziraphale lies and says he's lost it, and God, who is omniscient and therefore knows this to be a lie and knows exactly where the sword is, lets the entire thing pass unremarked. (More on this anon.)

5. It is not a reach too far to suspect this of God. She tells us Herself that she is a trickster and that we can't trust her not to deceive us:

She also tells us

i. The universe is a game she is playing for her own amusement:

🎵cosmic horror alerrrrrrrrrt!🎵🎶

ii. No one, including angels and demons, has been told the real rules of this game:

"FOR EVERYONE ELSE." Not just humans.

That's why Crowley and Aziraphale each have to wonder if they've done the right or the wrong thing: nobody's told them what the rules are. Aziraphale even thinks that Crowley's temptation of Eve is "all part of the Plan," i.e, that Crowley did the right thing by doing the wrong one. They have no way to tell, and it may be both right and wrong at the same time. (Wrestling with impossible moral conundra raised by a brief look into a story happening on a much greater level than your own? You could be suffering from our old pal Thesis 2: Good Omens is cosmic horror!)

So Aziraphale's Promethean gift to humanity was one of God's objectives, just as cursing humans and yeeting them out of the Garden with the knowledge of Good and Evil and maybe a couple apple seeds in hand was His/er objective.

BONUS! Thesis 3: So why does God bring up Aziraphale's misappropriation of the sword at all? To show us, the audience, that Aziraphale lied to Her and that his gifting of the sword to Adam is part of Her Plan.

Remember from her whole deal with the Tree: God likes to set up situations so that She can react to them. Here she lampshades her awareness of what Aziraphale has done, listens to him lie to Her about it, and then very pointedly does nothing in response to that. She wants everyone watching--i.e., Aziraphale and us--to note that she has noticed the transfer of the sword and is not displeased by it and has noticed the lie and is not going to do anything about that either.

Remember as well, God is the one controlling the narrative we see in S1 of Good Omens. She introduces and concludes the story, and she narrates the scenes of the baby-swap. She's in control of which scenes we see and the order in which we see them. Since she is the one who asked Aziraphale the question about the sword, she's also responsible for this scene's existence.

So why do I think this scene is meant for us and not Aziraphale? Two reasons. Firstly, the conversation with God doesn't do Aziraphale any good. He worries about eventually getting in trouble about the sword until 2019, around 6,000 years later.

God is both omniscient and omnipotent, so it's not possible that She failed to communicate to Aziraphale in such a way that would ease his anxiety. Therefore the conversation was not for his benefit. Again, she's omniscient, so it wasn't for Her benefit either. That leaves the only other party to this conversation: us. The audience.

The next obvious question is, Why does God want us to know that Aziraphale's gift of the flaming sword was both of his free will and part of Her Plan?

I don't know. But I think it may become important, and here is where we delve into hypothesis territory: I think Good Omens is going metafictional. I mean this in a Doki Doki Literature Club, Black Mirror: Bandersnatch way: God, the character in Good Omens, is telling us, the audience, a story.

This metafictional aspect has been with us the whole time---more precisely since 01:13 of S1E1, when God switches from third-person to first-person and addresses us the viewers directly:

And there are several more metafictional; notes in S1 and S2 that I've found so far:

Season 1

That giant eyeball up there floating in space with a bunch of arcane shit around it is a reference to the opening credits sequence of The Twilight Zone, a metafictional show in which an omniscient narrator introduces and concludes each story by addressing the audience directly.

S1E1 27:20

Season 2

1. Maggie and Nina are fictional characters, but the characters share their names with actors Maggie Service and Nina Sosanya.

2. The final credits sequence, with the split screen showing Crowley on one side and Aziraphale on the other, references David Tennant and Michael Sheen's previous/simultaneous lockdown tv series project, Staged! which is intensely metafictional and in which Tennant and Sheen play characters based on themselves and with their names.

3. Sloppy plot synopsis or something more sinister?

4. An interviewer points out that Good Omens references Doctor Who as an extant concern in-universe, which obviously stars David Tennant in the past and currently.

If you find more, please drop them in the comments!

We the audience, are meant to understand ourselves and our reality as being indirectly involved in this story. And God wants us to know 1) that Aziraphale lied to Her about giving away the sword, knowing it was futile, and 2) that his gift of the flaming sword was part of Her Plan. The former is a major character note, and probably a foreshadowing one; but I have no guesses about God's purpose in showing us that the gift of the flaming sword was also to Plan except that whatever it is will probably make me dislike Her approach to parenting even more than I already do.

What I do love about this though is that it suggests that Crowley and Aziraphale both did the right thing by doing the wrong one, i.e. achieved a kind of Schroedinger's obedience, which is nice and disturbing and surprise! pretty cosmic horror. More sweetly, though, it suggests that the two foundational gifts to humanity from the divine were motivated by Crowley's low-effort mischief and Aziraphale's kindheartedness, which is lovely to think about.

DO NOT TAG NEIL GAIMAN IN ANY POST THAT INCLUDES OR REFERENCES THIS ESSAY.

#good omens #good omens s2 #good omens god #good omens metafiction #good omens cosmic horror #good omens flaming sword

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scrapheapchallenge · 5 months

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"Just Neil Gaiman being wholesome again" but also Rob Wilkins being extra wholesome too! On Tuesday evening I went to this talk https://living-knowledge-network.co.uk/library/the-worlds-of-terry-pratchett By Rob Wilkins and Neil Gaiman.

Neil was co-author of "Good Omens" with Sir Terry Pratchett, and they collaborrated on many other books together here and there, just not sharing co-author status too - read this article for more info: http://www.elizabethcallaway.net/good-omens-stylometry?fbclid=IwAR2hVnd8aTYFBZqphk8SzYt8j1NucBl5mUxbDscF3kljQ9Bpuq2leUW2S6I Confirmed by Neil yet again on Tuesday.

Rob Wilkins was Terry's PA, and now manages his estate, as his representative. He also wrote "A life in footnotes" - the official biography of Terry.

On Tuesday evening, I arrived at the British Library very early, and was guided up to the Piggot Theatre lobby to wait by a security person, so I was there before anyone else, including Rob. All the staff were absolutely lovely. When they noticed there weren't any gaps for wheelchair spaces in the audotorium, facilities engineers were summoned and made short work of unbolting a set of 3 seats to make a wheelchair space for myself and another wheelchair user who turned up later.

Then Rob turned up, carrying a mannequin, Terry's leather jacket, scarf, hat, and other stuff.

Now the email we recieved before the event said that Neil wouldn't have time to do any signings that evening, although they didn't mention Rob, so I asked him if he might be able to sign my copy of "a life in footnotes".

He happily said yes, and once he'd sorted his things out, he came back out to chat to me for a while and OMG he was the loveliest person EVER!

I gave him a print I'd signed of my ink portrait of the Bentley, and some stickers of my other Bentley illustrations, and he said "WAIT! I have presents for you too! I'll be right back!" Then rushed off to the green room. (Below are the ink portrait, then I gave him small stickers of the "this is fine" flaming Bentley - which I was also wearing on my t-shirt that day - and my most recent digital portrait of Crowley and the Bentley - and yes it is all hand drawn, not a photo manipulation, feel free to zoom in. A couple of years separate these 3 drawings and I'd been working hard on learning photorealism.)

He came back and gave me Terry and Neil badges, which he explained you only get if you meet them in person. I had met Terry (and incidentally Rob as well) years ago at a book signing, plus I met Neil, albeit briefly, on Tuesday as he came through the lobby and said hello.

He was happy to chat and especially about cars, which he also loves. He confirmed that I was 100% correct about the "2 whole cars and a cab for CGI" between seasons 1 and 2, and that the interior colour change is nothing to do with plot it legitimately is just continuity errors if they forgot to cover the new Bentley's new seats with covers matching the old Bentley's orange ones. (The cab only also has orange leather seats).

When I told him about this year's RREC (Rolls Royce Enthusiast's Club - also for Bentleys) Christmas card design, he was delighted, and asked to take a photo of the image I had of one on my phone because he wants to order some as well.

I showed him my re-usable coffee cup from "give me coffee or give me death" which we were given on the set tour, and which I had Sir Derek Jacobi sign at a comic con the other week. Rob thought that was wonderful, and then did something extra sweet...

He asked me "if you're ok trusting me with this for a little while, would you like me to sneak it back to the green room to ask Neil to sign it for you as well? Then I'll come and find you afterwards to give it back again."

HELL YES! I couldn't believe it! I hadn't wanted to ask because we'd been told that Neil wouldn't be signing things due to lack of time, so for Rob to spontaneously make the offer was not something I was expecting. He did also take my Occult Edition of Good Omens to ask if Neil would sign that as well.

I didn't fully expect that he would, and was prepared for him to come back later and say "sorry he was too busy", and that would have been fine, but no: Neil DID sign them both!

Neil writing "burn this (big fancy) book!" was a spin on how Terry used to sign copies of Good Omens: "burn this book" - which is actually embossed on the rear cover of this edition.

Later, Rob also signed it for me, as did Colin Smythe, who was Terry's publisher and lifelong friend.

We were sitting at the front, only about 7 or 8 feet from Neil, the talk was wonderful, we laughed, we cried a little, and Terry was with us in the form of the mannequin with his jacket, scarf, and hat (which are also on set of Good Omens at all times while filming, and also even during rehersals/table reads - so he's always present.)

Rob is honestly so bloody wholesome, he was hugging a lot of people, and ever so sweet, taking time to chat to other people as the venue filled up, and stayed behind to sign things and talk to other folks as well.

I also got to chat to Dr Pat Harkin and Dr Jan Clarke, who were the researchers who spent months of hard work tracking down Terry's lost short stories in the national archives in Boston Spa, which were released in a compliation book "A stroke of the pen." If I'd known that they'd be there as well, I'd have taken that book and asked them to sign it too. They were in the audience and sitting next to us with Colin Smythe. I was truly surrounded by Pratchett royalty, and everyone, without exception, was SO friendly and lovely.

I had done two prints of the Bentley drawing and stickers, for Rob and for Neil, in case I got chance to give them to them, and when I gave Rob his, I said I had some for Neil as well, and again, he OFFERED to take them to give them to Neil for me.

Although I didn't get chance to thank Neil in person, I wanted to reach out to let him know I was very grateful for his kindness as well, so sent him a message via his "ask" channel, although not with an expectaction of reply - just for him to see privately and know that I was appreciative. But he chose to actually publish it as a public reply, which was lovely of him. I hadn't wanted to thank him publicly just in case he didn't want others to know that he had signed some items after all. I'd been expecting to have to wait until he did a proper public appearance with signing at a comic con or something - although with him living in the USA, not the UK, I may have had to wait a long time.

So I guess the answer is to getting an autograph - turn up 2 hours early, and be very VERY nice and polite to Rob Wilkins 😅 (but also don't expect results - I didn't, it just sort of happened).

#goodomens #Neil Gaiman #Rob Wilkins #Crowley #Crowley's Bentley #good omens fanart #Good Omens Art

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rollforjackass · 9 months

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okay so i reread the good omens script book trying to look up a quote i remembered and i kept writing down the things that i absolutely loved about it, so here's just a list of all the quotes and moments that rewired my brain chemistry

aziraphale sasses the hell out of crowley about his antichrist birth organization skills

aziraphale saying “oh sugar” instead of oh shit...

first appearance of everyday by buddy holly, we all know how that turned out

aziraphale doesn’t know how an ansaphone works. this was in the book too, but it’s still funny, especially considering how in radio omens he at least knows about caller id

aziraphale brought shortbread for the drive to the convent. did he think it was a date? please say yes

crowley asked aziraphale if heaven wouldn’t give him (crowley) asylum and aziraphale was going to ask him the same about hell

aziraphale says “what the hell” after pointedly not swearing earlier. hypocrite ass

aziraphale is fine with killing the antichrist himself but gets upset about the humans killing each other at tadfield manor....more tasty hypocrisy. he thinks he can only ever do the Right Thing but he knows it's Wrong when anyone else does it

“aziraphale is rather enjoying having the upper hand in the ideas department for once”

crowley says “dude. chill.”

“for a moment his noble better nature rejects the idea out of hand. THEN HE FALLS...”

“aziraphale is softening. they haven’t spoken in a hundred years: he’s realizing they are still friends.” gets me every time i look at it

why was shadwell in prison?? america explain

“i work in soho, i hear things” patron saint of soho confirmed

i still think that the neon halo blinking on and off above aziraphale’s head is the HARDEST that neil gaiman has ever gone and that we deserved to see it in the final cut

"michael: when your cause is just you do not hesitate to smite the foe, aziraphale." i'm thinking thoughts about the s2 finale under this lens; when your cause is just (saving the love of your life) you do not hesitate to suffer for pursuing it

“crowley looks back. he looks at aziraphale. above them, a beautiful starry sky. and crowley softens.” jesus janthony christ.

“aziraphale is looking for someone. he spies a human statue dressed as an angel, with wings. it’s not him.” GOD

gabriel about aziraphale: “i’m disappointed in him. not thinking like an angel.”

crowley “looks up, and talks to god, in the classical fashion.” see i really want a script book for s2 because i want to see aziraphale's expressions of faith plucked out a little bit more

crowley in the cinema: “he’s waiting for the end of the world. out of time. out of hope.”

the fact that crowley saw aziraphale walking down the street and left dagon on read is priceless

aziraphale looks hurt after crowley says he won’t even think about him

the music for the gavotte scene was recommended to be “i am a courtier grave and serious” from gilbert and sullivan’s the gondoliers which is PERFECT

“aziraphale is heading down the street, looking harried and as if he is carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. which he is.”

sandalphon says “you know how we treat traitors in wartime?” to aziraphale and there was meant to be blood on aziraphale’s lips after sandalphon punches him. death to sandalphon

“why would you do this? we’re the good guys.”

aziraphale (resolutely not swearing): you. you B…AD angels.

“seducing women to do your evil will!” “i think perhaps you’ve got the wrong shop.” still the campiest line delivery i've ever seen

we don't need to speculate about crowley being in tears in the burning bookshop because according to the script he is canonically right on the verge of it

“right. i’m done. i’ve had it. i don’t care about any bloody angels or humans or anyone. i hate you all. somebody killed my best friend, and i don’t even care who did it. bastards, all of you.” 😭

when aziraphale is discorporated, his heavenly appearance is all his normal clothes but gleaming white

aziraphale: i have no intention of fighting in any war. “all angels on the floor turn and look at the angel who has said the unsayable.”

aziraphale can’t actually see crowley in the bar scene…he has no idea how wrecked his best friend is

aziraphale doesn’t take sugar with his tea. bastard

aziraphale crosses his fingers under the table when answering shadwell’s nipple question

aziraphale is wearing madame tracy’s pink motorbike helmet in the mirror of her scooter

they describe crowley’s suit in the burning bentley as “interestingly ripped”...........we were robbed of a crowley boob window moment and i'll never forget

aziraphale introduces crowley to madame tracy as “he’s…well, we’re sort of business associates.” you know, like a liar

aziraphale was fully about to murder adam. i don’t think i can stress this enough

aziraphale pokes himself to make sure he’s solid once he’s separated from madame tracy

aziraphale isn’t threatening crowley with the sword, “just making his point that he can do dangerous out-of-character things if he needs to.”

crowley: what if the almighty planned it this way all along? from the very beginning aziraphale: takes a drink from the bottle of wine

aziraphale looks like he’s going to cry when crowley reminds him that the bookshop burnt down 😭

aziraphale-as-crowley looks depressed 😭 he still thinks his bookshop is gone

the angels kidnapping crowley-as-aziraphale zip-tied his hands those dickheads

aziraphale-as-crowley: my friend! they’re kidnapping my friend!

the hit hastur gives aziraphale-as-crowley would have killed a human 0/10 wahoos

“the van with [crowley-as-]aziraphale in it drives away, and [aziraphale-as-]crowley tries to crawl after it.” HEY NEIL I JUST WANT TO TALK

crowley-as-aziraphale says “what fun. i love a barbecue.”

i am literally ENRAGED that sandalphon was like “hell yeah you can hit aziraphale” to the minor demon who brought the hellfire i WILL throw hands

uriel calls it a barbecue too those fuckers

in the script uriel and sandalphon have their flaming swords drawn, so it wasn't going to be as insidious as expecting aziraphale to walk into the flame of his own volition. but they didn’t end up including it in the show, so it is that insidious after all

aziraphale-as-crowley keeping his socks on for the bath was such a choice

“he doesn’t actually have a newspaper and a cigar, but damn, he’s enjoying himself in his bath”

i've seen so little talk about how absolutely ice cold aziraphale is in the bath scene with the whole “so you’re probably thinking, ‘if he can do this, i wonder what else he can do’? and very, very soon, you’re all going to get the chance to find out.” BECAUSE THAT SHIT IS TERRIFYING

aziraphale-as-crowley: michael. duude.

crowley and aziraphale both get out of their own elevators and meet up to walk out together which is poetic cinema

PIGBOG AND THE OTHER MOTORCYCLE IDIOTS THAT HUNG OUT WITH DEATH WERE GOING TO BE INCLUDED i miss them

#suffice it to say i've been on a deep dive #part of the reason i love the book so much is just all the little details that a tv show just can't spare the time for #and the script has so many lovely little tidbits that make me rewatch episodes hunting for a scrap of their existence #like i was Looking for that shortbread man i remember that vividly #i'll probably look again later too #ugh ugh ugh what a time to be alive was season 1 #and if there's a script book for s2 you bet your ass i'll be deep diving again #good omens #oxly hollers

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go-go-devil · 1 year

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for the send you a character ask!! talk about a character of your choice!! would be fun to learn about a new character lol

Since I still have a special interest in The Sandman series, I'll use this as an excuse to talk about Delirium of the Endless!

First impression: I was paging through a copy of Brief Lives that we got at the book store I work at and was instantly captivated by her incredibly unique comic text bubbles, along with her unusual way of speaking. She was legit the main catalyst in getting me interested in reading the Sandman comics just so I could learn more about her (and her siblings)

Impression now: Supreme Goddess of Neurodivergency and Transgender and Fluttering Swimmy Things 🦋🐠 Easily my favorite character in the series and sooooooo happy that she helped get me into these awesome graphic novels!

Favorite moment: Geez I dunno, every single thing she does in Brief Lives? I really can't stress how much I enjoy this character, and honestly she appears so far into the comics that any singular moment I describe would be spoilers

I guess to keep it as vague as possible I particularly love the scene where she stabilizes herself for the sake of telling off her eldest brother Destiny and comforting her brother Dream. It's a short scene, but to me it's when her entire character really clicked into place for me, that's all I'll say for now ;)

Idea for a story: I was always fascinated with how Rose Walker's hair colors perfectly reflect Delirium's. Hell I actually thought Del was going to make her first appearance in The Doll's House due to that, but sadly that wasn't the case. Personally I'd love to read (or even write) a story about Rose coming into contact with Del in some way, perhaps serving as the exact moment when her Vortex powers start developing. I just really want these two to interact, they're both such interesting characters 🥺

Unpopular opinions: ARE there any unpopular opinions of Delirium? I don't engage with the wider Sandman fandom so I'm out of the loop there. Fandom-wise I will say he one thing I would definitely hate the most is if anyone ever tries to infantilize Del. Yes she may be the youngest of the Endless and have a notably child-like way of articulating much of her thoughts, but that doesn't mean she's stupid!

Favorite relationship(s): Getting the obvious out of the way, I adore how her relationship with Dream was handled. It would have been so predictable to have him be constantly annoyed at and condescending to his littlest sister because of how much younger and less formal she is compared to him, but instead Neil Gaiman took the high road by actually having Dream try his best to understand her and treat her as an equal throughout their journey. Honestly even all these decades later it's still refreshing for me as someone who's used to seeing neurodivergent-coded characters being treated as nothing more than comic relief and/or demonized for the way they act

Of course I also love the strong sibling bond she had/continues to have with Destruction. Can't describe that one in too much detail because once again that would be major spoilers, but it out of all of her siblings he seemed like the only one who really tried to understand her and actually accepted her change

I also do like what little we see of Del and Barnabus together. I see him as her emotional support dog since good lord she was in dire need of one. He's often sarcastic with her and doesn't really understand much about Del's thought-processes yet, but I do love how he chooses to remain loyal to her and help her out the best he can. The way he does so in her portion of the Endless Nights comic in particular made me super emotional T_T

Favorite headcanon: As I mentioned earlier I do hc that she had a direct encounter with Rose Walker at some point. There was also this one piece of fanart I saw that depicted Delirium and Dream creating "fever dreams" together and I totally love that idea! The Endless's powers inevitably cross with each other in certain instances, so I'm always down for seeing depictions of them working together in such a way

#delirium of the endless #the sandman comics #mild brief lives spoilers #asks #sorry for the late response #hopefully my long rambling has made up for the wait!

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copperbadge · 2 years

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Hello! I finished reading Fete about 12 hours ago and I wanted to ask if there is any chance you would consider at some point writing genuine fanfic for the Shivadhverse, once you finish the stories you have planned? By which I mean things that don't belong in the actual novel because they don't necessarily serve the plot, and aren't long enough to be their own thing within your planned series of books, but that we fannish types would enjoy because they're sweet or funny (or steamy, if you'd consider higher rated stuff). I did read the first short story in the original AO3 post and the Duke of the Orange bit, and that's essentially what I mean -- just wondering if there is any more of that to come. I think the book as you wrote it told the story exactly as "completely" as a piece of fiction should, but in true fandom style I'm also not quite ready to be done with Eddie and Gregory's romance (I'm sure I will feel the same about Jes and Michaelis but I'm not that far yet). I just desperately want more fluff and shenanigans about those two being in love 💕

I'm so glad you enjoyed Fete! I hope you have fun with Infinite Jes and LATT, too :)

It's an interesting question to answer because there's two aspects to consider. The first is simply "Are there going to be more short stories" -- things that fit into the universe but aren't either supporting the storyline of a novel directly or novels in themselves. There are a handful more of those that you'll reach as you keep reading, and I do plan to put out a book of short stories when I have enough. Beyond the idea of more short stories, if you just want News Of Gregory And Eddie, that does definitely exist in the second and third books -- we see them developing their relationship and figuring out their life together. While I'm conceptually designing the second set of three books around non-royals (Caleb the musician, Georgie the bodyguard, Simon the chef) they're all royal-adjacent, so we'll still be following along with the lives of the royals.

But there is a second aspect, which is the idea of writing a story that not only doesn't fit into the canon neatly but might be divergent from it, like an AU or something that would mess up later canon if inserted. I'm less likely to do that simply because I enjoy expanding on what I've already done, and if I want something to exist within the narrative I simply make it canon. I think of Neil Gaiman being asked if he writes fanfic of his work, and him replying "Well, if I write it, I can just publish it." So I'm more likely to write something that could be considered fanfic but which ends up being labeled and printed as a short story, because it's my world and I can say what does and doesn't get published as canon.

Even if I were to write something on the porny side, it's not like erotica never gets published. Initially I had considered adding in some porn to Fete and publishing two versions, one with and one without, but I find writing sex scenes kind of exhausting these days, so I decided as long as I was doing this mainly to entertain myself, I wouldn't do anything that felt like work. :D I definitely do think about the kinds of sex the various people in the universe have, like for example I know that Gregory enjoys the fact that Eddie can significantly manhandle him. But the actual written prose version of those ideas is less likely to ever exist than simply stories about their lives.

But yeah -- I'm definitely not abandoning the storylines of the initial characters just because I'm writing other stories. There is a certain level of mirroring; the Eurovision story is also about Michaelis and Jes's developing relationship, the California story is also about Gregory and Eddie becoming dads, and Simon's story will have a strong underplot about Jerry and Alanna's marital misadventures. (This is all predicated on them getting written but between my love of this universe and my new medication it's looking pretty likely!)

#shivadhverse

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boxingcleverrr · 8 months

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Omg today I was reminded of the time I learned to ALWAYS take someone's bad celebrity story with a grain of salt, ahahaha

(like, obviously short of actual assault/aggression/refusing to meet marginalized ppl etc, I mean the "I met so and so and they were really short w/me D:" stories)

SOOO eons ago on WoW, we had a guild member who was...ergh. This person played a Male High Elf Paladin (tm) and did not grasp that Role Playing is collaborative storytelling. Like at ALL. She had this character come in like a wrecking ball main character energy sad cult boi ALL THE TIME, in our fuckin guild of Merry Misfits (Sepulchre was still technically a military guild at that point, but like. We were MASH, not SWAT).

And hey, we're a bunch of nerdy RPers, give us someone who's Too Much and we'll roll with it! Redemption arc? Anakin arc? Give us the meat to gnaw on!

She never did, though. She just had this character come in and Be Conflicted Angry Sad Boy and no amount of other people trying to interact would show any other aspect of this character, or express any interest in learning about yours. It was weeks and then months of RPing with a Sad Angry Wall who made our public Soup Kitchen nights really awkward, AT BEST.

Needless to say, this was very much the players personality as well. Being in chat with her was torture, if you just wanted to chat with your buds or shoot the shit. Naw, we had textwalls about how we were all min/maxing wrong, or the next public breakdown she was planning for Sad Boi.

A COUPLE of times I was elected, as the most tactful guild officer at the time, to take her aside and be like look. You need to be a little less rigid here, if you want to be in an RP guild, cause RP hinges on "yes and?" and give and take, and putting yourself out there, etc.

To which I would get, "Well this is how I am, it's rude to expect me to change, my other guilds were fine with it!" etc. And like.

If she was a flavor of neurospicy, sure, most of us were/are in that guild. But she was also a little older than most of us, and talked all the time about how she'd been active in other RP guilds? So this was not a new arena. She was a self-professed experienced RPer, sooooo...how did you get ANYWHERE in that space making characters you absolutely don't want to grow or be social in any way?

(silly question I know, shitty people who play sledgehammers THRIVE in rp communities all the time, buuuut usually for longer, cause they respond to what others give them AT LEAST A LITTLE!)

But I digress. Aaaaall that is just the context, lol.

One day we're talking books in guild chat, and someone mentioned Neil Gaiman. And of course, she pipes up with, "UGH I went to a Sandman signing once. He was so rude and dismissive."

In our voice channel, it's just me and a couple of others at the same time. And we ALL lost it at that. Cam was like, "Oh man I bet she tried to tell him something he'd done wrong..."

Literal SECONDS LATER in chat:

"I mean I felt like it was important to know he got ___ incorrect, but I guess the pretty girls in the line telling him they loved Death were more interesting."

"Are we...are we in an episode of Portlandia?!" My ex asked outloud, in our Japan dining room, no cameras in sight.

So yes I was just scrolling the man's asks and people noted on one, wondering if the man ever lost patience with some of the dumber and/or entitled asks in his askbox, and like.

Heh, I know at least ONE kinda person who probably made him wanna jump out a window. Cause I had to deal with months of them.

#blathering

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takerfoxx · 2 years

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The Sandman, Bonus Episode, "Dream of a Thousand Cats/Calliope," First Impressions!

Well, this was a nice surprise!

Well, okay, not really that much of a surprise for me, as it dropped before I started the show, but even still!

See, one of the problems facing any adaptation of The Sandman is that there are a number of standalone stories, ones that range from being deeply connected to the plot to having no connection at all, but were just cool ideas that Neil Gaiman had. And honestly, I wasn't sure if we were going to get any of them. Like, this is still an expensive show, so why spend the money on an experimental tangent?

Well, apparently Gaiman and the rest of the crew went, "How about I do anyway?" And now here we have an episode comprising two of the short stories from Dream Country, Sandman's third volume and first short story collection.

Calliop actually does make a lot of sense to include, as it is tied to the plot in that introduces the fact that Morpheus was once married and had a son, while also further exploring how his imprisonment changed him. But Dream of a Thousand Cats is a real surprise, as it has nothing to do with the plot at all! Dream is barely in it at all! Like, it's cool, it's creative, it stands out in the mind and makes you think, but it's not what one would call essential to the story.

But they did it anyway, and for that I am thankful. And it's animated as well, which is really cool, and it also continues the original Sandman's comic of constantly switching up the art style. Granted, the Garfield-styled thought-speak was a little jarring. I know it's how they "talked" in the comics, but on screen it's a bit odd. But it wasn't that big of a problem, and it was still cool to see.

That being said, I honestly don't have a lot to say about it, as it's basically a totally faithful adaptation of the story. If you've read Dream of a Thousand Cats, then it gives you exactly that. Though it was neat to see the voice cast comprised of not only many of Gaiman's frequent collaborators, but also the man himself, voicing the dead crow. How appropriate.

But Calliope! Oh, I have a lot to say about this one! And for once, it's actually about the story itself instead of how it stands as an adaptation. Again, it's very faithful. There's been a few things changed. For one, Ric is much more hesitant before forcing himself on Calliope, and we don't actually see the deed itself (thank God), though the chilling shot of the blood mark on his cheek when he finally start writing is still very disturbing and makes it clear exactly what happened.

But other than a few tweaks here and there, it's still a very faithful adaptation of the story. So why am I going to discuss this story on a thematic level when I didn't do the same for the others?

Because this story does click with me in a way that the others don't, and seeing it realized on screen really spoke to me.

See, this is Stephen King-esque case of Writers Writing about Writers Writing. Richard Madoc is a writer struggling through massive writer's block. He had one success, and now everyone expects him to follow it up, from his fans to his agent to the publishers to himself. And he doesn't have any ideas! He can't get the story going! It's driving him mad! And so, out of desperation, he does a terrible thing.

Maybe it's because I'm only just coming off of a really bad case of writer's block myself, but it really did hit me. That part where he's staring at a blank screen while also doomscrolling what other people are saying about him, while wincing at every message asking when the next book is? I've been there. I'm not a published author, but I've still been there, over and over again. Only this week I've had several people reach out wondering when I'm going to update a story I wasn't even working on.

However, there is a huge "but" in here.

And that is, desperate or not, Richard still abuses Calliope. He still imprisons her for his own selfish desires. He still takes advantage of her. He still dehumanizes her. He still violates her. And he never gives her back her freedom. In many ways, he's the dark reflection of William Shakespeare, who also sought supernatural forces to get over his own shortcomings as a writer. But Will simply made a pact with those forces, like Calliope said Richard should. Richard forced the matter.

Calliope is shown to be a real person, not just some abstract idea. She tells this plainly to Richard, makes it clear that she isn't just some resource to be used, that her gifts are gifts, not something to be taken by force. She's had a life. She's been in love. She's been in pain. And that was taken from her. And despite all the years he had her locked up, Richard never bothered to find out the smallest thing about her. He didn't even know that she had a child.

In his success, with the desperation no longer hanging over him, we see what kind of man he really is. He is arrogant, self-absorbed, and self-righteous. He's angry with the woman whom he's violating when she doesn't share his celebration. And let me just say, despite all the criticism this show has taken from being too "woke," it does not pull its punches in calling out performative progressivism. Richard calls himself a feminist, despite actively dehumanizing a woman. He insists on diverse casts and crew, despite, again, violating a real person for his own needs. We've seen several artists who were once upheld as paragons of progressivism come falling down when their hypocrisies were laid bare (*cough*WHEDON*cough*). And while I know that scene was written and filmed before her own fall from grace, that namedrop of Rowling ended up being incredibly appropriate, even if it was by accident.

Everyone here turns in a masterful performance. Arthur Darvill really does capture that quiet desperation and that insufferable hypocrisy that someone like Richard Madoc would embody with eerie perfection. The exhausted resentment and resignation coming from Calliope is plainly evident in Louise Hooper's performance. And Tom Sturridge as Dream continues to be absolutely perfect, where here we get to see his quiet, righteous wrath, and it is terrifying.

Calliope's final note about never forgiving what Richard did to her but still needing to forgive what the man did to her was interesting. Forgiveness is sometimes sloppily handled in fiction, often demanded when it's not warranted. So I like that she made it clear that she will never forgive what Richard did to her, and nor should she, but she also decides to let go of her anger toward him so she can move on. People might debate if that's really the right message here, but I'm glad that they made the distinction.

And we also see how Dream has changed, becoming more compassionate and empathetic thanks to his ordeal. This will definitely be tested come Season of Mists, as his worst moment comes back to haunt him. But until then, I am loving this.

Hey, I know we're not getting Elemental Girl's story, but how about Midsummer Night's Dream? That one's kind of important!

#the sandman #neil gaiman #dream of the endless #calliope #richard madoc #louise hooper #arthur darvill #tom sturridge #dream of a thousand cats/calliope #netflix #review

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aboutzatanna · 2 years

Text

On Why I’m Still Firmly Anti-John Zee

I’ve mentioned in previous posts that I’m not a fan of the Zatanna/John Constantine pairing. It’s not due to one reason but many and a lot of it boils down to erasing Zatanna’s own history, achievements and changing her character to fit her in to the mold of Constantine’s love interest rather than continuing to develop her as a hero in her own right.

One point that I made that folks keep misinterpreting is the one about Constantine’s involvement in John Zatara’s death. This is not even the primary reason why I dislike the pairing so I want to clear up any misconceptions regarding what I said.

What I wrote was, both explicitly and implicitly that Constantine was indirectly responsible for his death. Yes, it was the Great Darkness that killed Zatara and the latter chose to sacrifice himself in Zatanna’s place but they were there because of Constantine in the first place. He put them in the line of fire which resulted in Zatara’s death.

Constantine is a conman and throughout Swamp Thing #49-50 he uses various overt and subtle tricks to get them all at the table. Look closely at his interactions with Mento in the issue for example.

By the end of this he’s driven insane and turned into a villain in subsequent appearances.

In the case of the Zatara’s, he used Zatanna’s residual feelings for him and Zatara’s protectiveness to lure them to the table. He needed bodies to throw at the Darkness but at the same time he was also counting on Swamp Thing to succeed where others have failed which begs the question of what good the seance ultimately did. Anyway, don’t take my word for it, go read it yourself.

I suppose that’s the problem with asshole protagonists, people equate protagonist with hero and subconsciously believe that the ends justify the means or the protagonists sympathetic backstory justifies their crapsack actions but once you start humanizing whom they’ve hurt or try to hold them accountable, it’s a different story all together.

Anyway, I brought this story up amongst many others and it’s not even the worst offender (that would that dreadful JLD: Apokolips movie) or even an offender in any way. On its own I don’t hate the Swamp Thing story, in fact it’s one of my favorite comics, what I dislike is the way the story has been followed up on.

The thing is even though we got several stories set sometime after Zatara’s death none of them really addressed the immediate aftermath or trauma Zatanna experienced from it. Even the 1987 Zatanna Special was more about her searching for her identity. The Spectre story in Spectre Vol 2 #7 was a bizarre body horror story and her goodbye to her dad’s ghost at the end wasn’t really emotionally satisfying and it was more about tying up loose ends from her final arc in the JLA Vol 1. It was also a Spectre story and not a Zatanna story.

So when Books of Magic #2 came out and Zatanna jumped up and hugged Constantine I found it to be quite jarring.

I’m pretty sure if I took my girlfriend and her Dad on a trip that resulted in her Dad getting killed and then I showed up at her doorstep a couple of years later asking her to babysit a kid for me I strongly suspect that her reaction wouldn’t be to give me hugs and kisses.

This is not helped by the fact that after she agreed to babysit Tim Hunter she proceeds to endanger him by taking him to a bar full off seedy magical characters and when they inevitably gang up on her, she is too scared to fight back:

All of this so John Constantine can look cool:

Her reaction doesn’t make sense when you consider that Zatanna has been with the League for several years at this point and had seen everything from alien invasions to multiversal threats and has survived situations with her powers gone or diminished. Can you imagine Superman, Batman, Aquaman or Green Lantern being written like that?

And despite claiming to be over him:

She is clearly not over him:

The writer Neil Gaiman have said that Constantine was his favorite DC character to write so I’m not surprised that he wrote John more favorably than Zee.

Books of Magic is a great book and I recommend reading it. Also, there is no harm in criticizing the things you love. Literally, the only thing I didn’t like about the book was Zatanna’s characterization in it. She had been traumatized by Constantine’s gambles in the past and I found her suddenly being over it (mostly for the sake of plot) and somehow still having feelings for the bad boy and unable to resist his pelvic sorcery to be distasteful. It didn’t feel like an earned moment.

Other than that, it’s a great read. But like beautiful snowflakes that eventually causes an avalanche, it did start a trend.

Like how in the otherwise excellent ‘Zatanna: Come Together’ mini series has Marsha claim that she chooses guys based on how different they are from John:

Like, wtf? Her ON PANEL relationships, as in relationships we saw develop on panel in her published stories were with Jeff Sloan and Barry Allen. Constantine was retconned into her past for the sake of plot expediency in ST #50.

The comic also depicts her bemoaning how she wasn't as good as Constantine in one panel:

Which again, makes no sense in the greater context of her history. Zatanna was kicking ass for 20 years before Constantine was even conceived as a character yet the literal second she is associated with the fan favorite her entire character begins to revolve around him.

Luckily, Dini's Zatanna: Everyday Magic one shot did a much better job at characterizing Zatanna. Her character, relationships and choices didn't orbit around Constantine, she is the one who saves him, she has a life of her own completely separate from him and it was believable that she held no grudge against him but wasn't pining for him either. Her kissing him on the cheek didn't feel weirdly out of place and felt earned within the context of the story.

Dini’s handling of magic isn’t perfect but his handling of Zatanna has always been on point. When John purposefully sabotages one of her relationships while she was out risking her life to help him, she gives him the response he deserves:

And kicks him out:

“Spare you more of the same” what a jerk.

Sadly, despite being an independent heroine for much of the 90's and 00's, the Nu52 rebooted the character and molded her into love interest for Constantine. The only stories that get referenced are the ones with John Constantine in it with ST #50 now serving as more of an origin story than Zatanna’s actual origin story ‘Zatanna’s Search’.

The reason why I wrote posts like In Pictures: Zatannas Arc is in response to stories like JLD V1 #0 where she is treated as little more than a romantic pawn being passed between Constantine or Nick Necro.

Or how John lies to her to get her to join the team during Lemire’s run JLD and the constant cycles of John lying and keeping secrets from her but she has to keep coming back to him because she can’t save the day without him which is just...ugh.

Or how despite defeating the Upside Down Man and declared leader of JLD, she still keeps taking a back seat to John who is written more like a leader than her whereas she is depicted as useless without her magical power and the unnecessary drama of her keeping her possession by the UDM a secret. It’s like they took her flawed characterizations in BoM and made it her default characterization.

Or how in JLD Apokolips animated movie she was fridged to progress John's character arc and her entire purpose in the movie was for him to fulfill his destiny. Yuck!

Maybe some folks enjoy this take but I don't. I would much rather she is portrayed as competent heroine in her own right with her own supporting cast, villains and lore. We’ve only gotten little glimpses of that from the works of Conway, Paul Dini and Lee Mars.

What DC is doing to Zatanna is no different compared to what they did to Black Canary. They took a cool heroine, tie them to a male hero then proceed to weed out everything not related to said male hero and define them entirely by their relation to the male hero and you rarely get to see the female hero portrayed as better than the male one. She exists to move forward the story arc of the male hero whether as antagonist, ally or reward and rarely get a story arc of her own. Even when the relationship has run its course and characters have believably separated DC still pathologically pairs them together again as if they are meant to be forever. Bleh. I say this as someone who likes Ollie and Dinah (separately but not as a couple). With possible adaptations on the way, the last thing I want to see is Zatanna being written the same way as Laurel on Arrow, Lana Lang on Smallville, Raimi’s Mary Jane in his Spider-Man trilogy or even Diana in WW84 (which is it’s own essay for it’s problematic tropes) and I’m already seeing seeds of that in how she’s been written since Nu52.

Constantine isn't any more special than any other character in DC's roster. He's another asshole protagonist propped up by writer favoritism. Zatanna is not his true love. She only appeared once in his 300 issue Hellblazer run. The closest he ever came to having a true love in his own title was Kit Ryan. Likewise, Zatanna is not Constantine’s groupie. Her purpose isn't to comfort his man pain or make him look good and writers should stop making her look small just to make Constantine look good. She has her own world, supporting cast and love interests that she should be a part of.

Anyway, this got long, but I just thought I would clear this up. I started this blog for fun and to give lime light to lesser known stories, serve as a resource and maybe to get people read more comics. The last thing I want is for this place into some hostile shipping battle ground. I’m too old for that shit.

Evah a doog yad.

#zatanna #Zatanna Zatara #John Constantine #DC comics

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insomnikat-mused · 1 year

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What’s your fave book/song/fictional character and why maybe? ;w; hope you’re doing ok!! 💖

Oh gosh. I have had many fave book/song/fictional characters in my life, but perhaps the most enduring-- the ones I still love and appreciate and would say are defining elements of the person I have become-- are:

Good Omens. This was my gateway book into all Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman works (the former I came to appreciate much more as I got older). I was so obsessed with it the first time that I based an entire Highschool English project worth something like 30% of my final grade on it. It's the book I've reread the most (more than 5, probably less than 10). I think what got me was the perfect blend of fantasy, adventure, thriller and comedy, all told with a vocabulary easily understandable to a 10 to 12-year old. I think it was what first taught me to equate pretentious to doesn't know sh*t. I think it taught me what mansplain was before I even knew there was a word for that annoying thing that seemed to keep happening to me as I grew up. And I just really admired how Pratchett (and Gaiman, but mostly Pratchett) could dish out these really clever and honestly insightful takes on humanity facing the end of the world without once allowing the story to go dark or existential (something a lot of YA novels since, it seems, have failed to do). Yes, humanity as a whole seems to be mucking up the world. But in the end the world is what we decide to make of it, and it's filled with hope if there are still those who make choices with love in their hearts. At least, that's how I remember the takeaway feelings. Gosh, I think I'm overdue for a reread.

Song is honestly so hard. So I will default to my most recently liked Spotify song: J'ai ta main by Benjamin Biolay. Why did I like it? Because his voice is just that perfect tone of deep and husky that checks all my attraction needs. It's the sexy bedroom voice that narrates my dreams. It ripples and vibrates all the right places. In summary, this love song vibes like every one of my first romance choices in otome games.

Fictional character was the easiest choice: Hatake Kakashi from Naruto. He is my longest-standing fictional crush (who isn't, arguably, Darcy from Pride and Prejudice). Every blorbo since highschool is measured to him. He's mysterious. He's detached. His hair defies gravity even by anime standards. He reads smut novels and has 8 dogs. He goes out of his way to protect the ones he loves but doesn't like taking any credit. He doesn't care about looks which of course means he's super hot beneath the mask. And finally, his original japanese voice is absolutely within my sexy bedroom tonal range. 😂

If you've read this far, congratulations! Fave asks are still open.💫

#lol okay this came out long and perhaps a little tmi #but congrats! you get me to answer the question no one asked of:#what's the first thing that turns you on about a guy?#the takeaway of this post is: i can LITERALLY fall in love with my eyes closed #okay fine if we're being technically accurate 'sexually attracted'#you asked i answered #❤️

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foldingfittedsheets · 26 days

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One of my favorite adventures from my twenties was a trip I took alone up to Canada. Neil Gaiman was doing a reading for the release of Ocean at the End of the Lane, and I was living three hours south of the venue.

None of my friends could make it and it was before I had GPS but I decided to go by myself. The day before the event I had nightmares about being lost in Canada, but I woke up and still got in the car.

The drive was awful, and I clutched the printed out Mapquest directions like my life depended on it, lurching through stop and go traffic with my manual transmission car. But when I arrived I found parking easily. I had tried to be there early but between traffic and the border crossing I was barely on time.

When I got to the door it turned out there wasn’t any seating left. My face fell, and the lovely worker refused to let me go away disappointed. She snuck me into the area reserved for staff to watch the event.

I sat oddly isolated in the very back row, listening to Neil’s calm narration. Midway through a boy my age came over to join me. We chatted while the line moved to get things signed. He lived in China, and India, went to school in Scotland, and was here couch surfing just for this event.

He asked about my YouTube channel and I laughed and said I didn’t have one. He paused in confusion and said, “You should, you’re such a gifted storyteller!” Later his certainty that I had one made me imagine he was a multidimensional traveler and this iteration of me didn’t have a channel that he was familiar with on his world.

I got my copy of the book signed and we left together. We wandered the city at night, making our way toward the ocean. We were both surprised to have our way blocked not once but three times by skunks, wandering blithely through the metropolis.

We clambered over the breakers by the water, watching the boats and listening to the waves crash at our feet. I offered him a lift back to his couch and he agreed.

I got lost trying to find the way home, well off my printed directions. My nightmare had come true, but at 2am lost in a foreign city I had a feeling of serenity that everything would be okay.

I pulled up next to some mildly intoxicated guys walking along, asking if they knew the way. Later, relaying this story to my wife they were appalled by this decision. But a moment later a cop car interrupted us, clearly thinking something illegal was transpiring. I flashed my dimples and asked for directions and he set me back on the right path.

I only spent one night carousing, but I still think about that boy, hoping he’s doing well. I remember the surreal peace of the sleeping city, full of skunks and waves on the breakers.

#ramblies #story #writing #I know that he asked me for a kiss down by the water #but I can’t remember if I gave him one #I don’t think so but I might have just for the laugh and the night of adventure

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steelthroat · 5 months

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Babe wake up new characters in my school-life lore just dropped:

[ Tw: kind of heavy subjects treated lightly/with slight irony in the second half of the post ]

The first one:

Subject: art history

Name: Victorian-Age Vampire

Special attack: Elitist posture +20 annoyance // Judgmental death-stare -20 defense// "If it's popular it's bad"-laser +1000 annoyance// "Indie music is better"-energy ray +10000¹⁰⁰ annoyance

This man is the reason I use Neoclassical as an insult. This man is the reason I see the Art critic world described as "a circlejerk of men who think are so smart and interesting"

He sees someone wearing the shirt of a band? He will ask them if they actually listen to the band

He hears someone say a particular/pretty unused/specific word? He will ask them to say what it means cutting off the initial discourse

He stares. That kind of stare that wants you to feel uneasy.

My man is a celebrity look at him! Please look at him! Look at how great he is!!!!!!! LOOK AT HIM I SAY HE'S SUCH AN INTELLECTUAL!!!!!

He doesn't explain certain (and dare I say very important) paintings because "they're overrated". YOU CAN'T MAKE THIS SHIT UP I CAN'T BELIEVE IT-

The funniest thing is that he said he actually likes my character/personality for [insert reason here]. My mate, I'm sorry but the feeling is very much NOT mutual, and I really wish it didn't have to be like that, but I really can't stand you.

Also lol he's like, "You people shouldn't care about grades." I don't, because I don't want to have a mental breakdown caused by this ungrateful school (again), but there are people who care, and I can understand why.

He is pretty privileged, he was able to work with not only with one but 2 of his passions. And he did it because he could afford it.

Many people in my classroom(or in my school in general) who cannot. Grades (especially here) sometimes are the only thing that decides your fate, as much as teachers and older people feign ignorance.

The world doesn't work they way it worked 30 years ago or the way they actually think it does without having any tangible proof.

Lmao I remember he once said something along the lines of "[x] is not real art, masses like it, but critics acshualley" SIR YOU WORK IN THE ART FIELD YOU SHOULD KNOW YOU DON'T GET TO DECIDE SHIT.

How many artists were hated by the critics and their things regarded as "not real art" at their time, but now they're on our art history books and us students HAVE to study them????

What makes you think you(????) a contemporary of [x] have the true answer to what art is?

This mf started a discussion about books and thir importance based on the way they're written. We were talking about Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman, he doesn't know them and he thought he had his "gotcha moment"

I can't stand him, he reminds me of 12 years old me too much. I really hope I outgrew that phase, otherwise please someone have mercy on me and just finish me off. I'm serious I don't wanna grow up like that.

But now let's not be dramatic, here's the real deal:

The second one:

Subject:[redacted]

Name: Creep

Special attacks: uneasiness +20 damage // smirk +200 annoyance // chill/funny demeanor +50 deception -30 defense // misogyny +50 annoyance +150damage

He wasn't bad but he always felt off to me, idk why I thought he was insincere.

Then two things changed my perception of him

1) point blank he shared with us the news of a girl who reported her rape after a certain amount of time here. And he said "nah she's lying, she wouldn't have waited so much time to report him" BITCH???? Omg y'all can only imagine how much this sentence fucking triggered me for many different reasons, none of which I'll be saying here, but fucking hell?????

But again, boomer, I never have high expectations towards them, so I was put off but heh... I've put up with worse. I mean fuck him, but alright I guess.

2) I was working on a project and I needed a thing. The thing was in the school basement and I'd never been there so I didn't know where to look for it. He seemed reluctant to accompany me, and he was all weird and fidgety. We get the thing, we go back and he is talking about the fact that "it looks weird when a professor and a student go alone in a basement and how he could get in trouble even if he didn't do anything and someone could report him for something he didn't do and it would ruin his life"

AND I WAS- Luke idk I probably visibly took some steps away from him because WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK MAN? LITERALLY INSERT HERE THE PETER GRIFFIN" who the fuck starts a conversation like this I just sat down" Meme.

Why are you saying this??? Why are you thinking of assaults when helping me find a thing that I need for a school project in the school basement???? Fear not my mate I will never go down there with you again after this one????? Fkn hell.

#steel rambles #art school #idk why I call him Vampire tbh #He's not actually soooo bad #like- he's an alright teacher #I really dislike his personality #no actually I don't even like the way he teaches #There's worse out there ik #I just dislike him tho #the second one is the worst #fkn creep #few months left and it's all over #just a few months

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iviarellereads · 9 months

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The Neverending Story, Chapter 12 - The Old Man of Wandering Mountain

(Curious what I'm doing here? Read this post! For the link index and a primer on The Neverending Story, read this one!)

In which I get to make references!

Long(1)-thundering avalanches descended from the heights, snow-storms raged between towering ice-coated summits, dipped into hollows and ravines, and swept howling onward over the great white expanse of the glaciers.

This weather is perfectly normal for the Mountain of Destiny, which is so dangerous that someone only succeeds in climbing it so infrequently that by the time another one does it, the previous person and their tale have been long forgotten.(2) Still, the CLE's glass litter makes its way up, carried by four of her invisible Powers under her orders to go, until at long last she tells them to stop.

The CLE makes the last part of the journey alone, and as she climbs a ladder, she reads the Old Man's messages to herself as they are carved into the rungs, in all caps.(3) The messages are warnings against bothering him, but the CLE goes ever forward until she finds him, carrying his book,(4) which is described…

…in such a way that Bastian recognizes it as the book he holds.

And the CLE leans over to observe that the sentence that described her reading the book is being written in the book. It's unclear which direction causality flows, if any. What is clear is that the CLE is forcing the hand of both the Old Man, and of Bastian as the saviour of Fantastica. She asks the Old Man to start the book over from the beginning.

Bastian, in snippets, reads the introduction of the very book in your hands, and reacts to it. At first he's dismissive, this isn't how the book started for him. And yet, as it continues, he is afraid of what the narration reveals about him in front of his eyes.

Then, in the story within a story within a story, Bastian introduces himself.

In that moment Bastian made a profound discovery. You wish for something, you've wanted it for years, and you're sure you want it, as long as you know you can't have it. But if all at once it looks as though your wish might come true, you suddenly find yourself wishing you had never wished for any such thing.

Bastian keeps reading as the Old Man keeps telling and writing the story of Bastian stealing the book, reading it, and reliving all Atreyu's tales, with Bastian watching. Eventually, it becomes too much. Bastian feels faint and calls out "Moon Child, I'm coming!", and the story breaks inside itself, and a wind blows into Bastian's attic, fluttering the pages of the book, and blowing out the candles as the clock strikes twelve.

=====

(1) I think the main elements of the image in my book are the titular Old Man and the mountain, but this one's less distinct overall than the others for me. (2) Wow, some cultures really do not keep records of their legends, huh? This is actually a fascinating assertion to me for a fantasy world. Because, of course some places would exist where such a record wouldn't be seen as necessary, but… I dunno, the implications are interesting to think about, IMO. (3) Probably the most common mental association for this is Discworld's Death character, speaking in all-caps or with reverb in audiobooks to distinguish his super-natural nature from anyone else. However, it's used to great effect in lots of media. The Wheel of Time has at least one scene, in the first book, where someone speaks in all-caps, and I believe it's used as a device in some of Neil Gaiman's work as well, though that's more likely to be in direct tribute to Terry Pratchett and/or The Neverending Story. (4) This, of course, is why I say Destiny of the Endless might be more homage to the Old Man than to Discworld's Death.

#the neverending story #bastian balthazar bux #the childlike empress #the old man of wandering mountain

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mandowh0re · 3 years

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Remember Me

Chapter 1

Summary: While cleaning up the timelines that he broke, Loki meets and inevitably loses the one person that's understood him in life. But he's not losing you without a fight

A/N: Beta'd by @edgyvege

Warnings: Mentions of death

Word Count: 1619

Happy reading!

It’s a quiet evening, and the Avengers that lived in the compound decided to take advantage of the rainy evening and have a movie night. Steve had called Tony over, who had brought Peter with him. The father and son duo has stopped on the way from the city to pick up a plethora of unhealthy snacks, including everyone’s favorite chips and candies.

They’re currently all settled in the common room watching She-Ra. Peter’s head is resing on Tony’s shoulder, Thor is snuggled up to Bruce, Natasha and Clint are sitting in the same recliner, Wanda and Vision are on one side of the love seat, Steve on the other side of Tony, Bucky and Sam sitting on the floor behind the coffee table.

They’re at the part where Adora is being stalked by Shadow Weaver in Mystacor, when the TV suddenly flickers, the audio warping. There’s a buzzing sound behind them closer to the kitchenette.

Everyone straightens in their seats, suddenly on alert.

“Friday,” Tony barks, pushing Peter behind him, “Lights.”

The lights cut on and everyone in the room watches as the air seems to distort and glow, similarly to when the sun beats down on the pavement, before a blonde man walks out with a cuffed and collared Loki behind him.

Every person in the room jumps into a defensive stance, some already with weapons that are always stashed and hidden throughout the compound, and each ready to fight at a moment’s notice.

Thor leaps over the couch and calls his hammer to him in one swift movement, but he doesn’t look frightened or angry.

He just looks… Mournful.

“Loki?” He says with apprehension, tilting his head.

It looks like Loki, and he’s certainly bound the way Loki should be if he were up to no good. But he watched Loki die. He watched Thanos crush the life out of him and toss him to the floor of that ship as if he were a worthless piece of balled up paper.

The blonde man holds up his hands in front of himself, as if to signal that they’re not here to cause any harm.

“Please, allow me to explain why we are here before this turns ugly.” The stranger pleads.

Thor looks back to his team, making eye contact with Tony and Steve.

They look apprehensive, and Tony has an iron grip on his kid, but Steve nods carefully.

Thor turns back to the stranger and nods, but his focus is mainly on Loki, “Go ahead.”

The man drops his hands and pockets them before beginning his story, “Okay. My name is Mobius, and I am a Timekeeper. My job, like Thor is probably aware, is to keep the timelines safe, intact, and to keep them from ever intersecting. When the Avengers used the Pym Particles to go back in time and retrieve the Infinity Stones; Stark, Rogers, Banner, and Lang went back to the Battle of New York in 2012. When they infiltrated the 2012 Avengers to get a hold of the tesseract, they made an error that caused the tesseract to fall into the hands of that Loki.”

Thor’s brows shot up to his hairline and he whipped around to look at Tony, “What? Why was I not informed of this?”

Now it’s Tony’s turn to hold his hands up, “Okay, hey. We didn’t have time to focus on that, and you were still grieving your brother. It would not have done anyone any good to bring it up while we were still in the fight of our lives.”

“And what about after?” He barks.

“While I agree this is something you all should discuss, I respectfully ask that you do that later,” Mobius interrupts, “I have places to be.”

Thor huffs and gives Tony one last glare before he turns back to the two other men.

“Right, anyways. When Loki took the tesseract and escaped, he broke that timeline. It caused multiple branches off of it,” He starts to take a step forward to the group, but decides against it when Thor’s nostrils flare, “We tracked him down, arrested him, and brought him into custody. He was given the option of life in prison or parole if he agreed to help us fix the timeline and erase the others. And I’m sure you can imagine what he chose.”

“I mean, there wasn’t much of a choice, was there?” Loki mumbles.

“Do you mind?” Mobius mumbles back, then turns to finish his story, “Through several months of helping us, Loki has proved himself to be, well, no longer a universal threat.”

“How do we know you aren’t under some spell of his?” Natasha asks, “Or working with him?”

“You don’t,” Mobius shrugs, “But he does know everything that has happened to him and those around him up until his final death. He was given the choice of choosing where he wanted to go at his time of being released, and I believe it says something for him to choose here.”

“Not much, actually. He’s manipulative.” Steve chimes in.

Mobius holds a finger up, “That he is. But unlike before, he has a lot more to lose this time.”

Thor crosses his arms, “And what would that be?”

***

You hum as you stock the shelves with the new shipment of books you just received.

It’s a nice day out. Mid April, the trees and flowers are blooming, and it’s finally nice enough outside to leave windows open. The mini fan is running on the counter where the register is, and the music is flowing quietly throughout your shop.

A very pleasant day, indeed.

You hear the windchimes attached to the shop door tinkle brightly, and you call over your shoulder as you finish placing the last few books, “Welcome! I’ll be right with you!”

When you’re finished, you grab the now empty cardboard box and use your pocket knife to break it down as you walk back to the front of the small store.

When you look up, a tall man with dark hair and a black suit is standing by the register, hands in his pockets. He’s incredibly handsome and as your eyes scan his features, you can’t help but feel like you have seen him before.

“Hi! How can I help you?” You ask, tossing the now flattened box onto a pile of others before walking behind the counter.

The man looks at you, tearing his gaze from a picture you had behind the counter, and his eyes meet yours. For the briefest of moments, you think you see grief flash across his emerald eyes. But as quick as you think you saw it, it's gone.

“Hello,” He greets, his voice satiny smooth, “A friend of mine recommended a book, and I was wondering if you could help me get my hands on a copy.”

“Sure!” You lean against the counter and fold your hands, “What’s it called?”

“I believe it’s called Norse Mythology, written by a Neil Gaiman.”

Your eyes light up and you push off your elbows to stand, “That’s my favorite book! Your friend must have amazing taste!” You wink.

He nods, eyes never leaving you, “I like to think so.”

“I definitely have it! Can’t really consider myself a good bookstore owner if I don’t keep my favorite books in stock, follow me.” You walk out from behind the counter and wave the handsome man to follow you. You know exactly where to go, and weave expertly between the shelves of your small shop. You finally come to a halt and reach down to grab the book, handing it to him, “Here you are.”

He takes the book from you and offers a kind smile and he turns it over in his hands, reading the back, “Thank you.”

“Of course, let’s go get you checked out,” You smile, staring at the handsome stranger before you realize what you’re doing.

The two of you walk back to the front of the store, and he lays the book down for you to scan it.

You take another look at him, and you’re not sure what possesses you to say it. You later account it to having been alone for so long.

“Actually- Here...” You lean down under the counter where you have your own stash of books, and grab your own copy of Norse Mythology. You stand back up and place it in front of him, “Why don’t you borrow my copy? I know it’s not as pretty as a new one, but if you don’t like it, you won’t have wasted the money. If you do like it, we can talk about it. Either way, you’ll have to return it,” You look down to the countertop before bringing your eyes to meet him once more, “And I can see you again.”

A beautifully sweet smile spreads across the man’s face. His eyes flicker down, noticing that you’re picking at your nails; it’s your nervous habit. He places a hand on the worn paperback book, “Lovely. Sounds like a plan to me. Shall we say next week, this time?”

Your smile brightens considerably, and you feel butterflies come to life in your belly, “See you then.”

He bends at the waist, bowing slightly, and turns to leave. You watch as his slender hand grabs the door knob, when a thought occurs to you.

“Wait!” You shout, reaching out your hand.

He stops dead in his tracks and turns back to you, an eyebrow quirked.

“What’s your name?”

He stiffens slightly. It’s so subtle that you barely notice it, but you do. Finally, a soft look adorns the man’s handsome features, and he looks a little sad. But he still answers.

“Loki.”

***

Remember Me Taglist: @idunnomayn

Permanent Taglist: @a-place-to-blog-marvel-stuff @yes-iamironman-blog @paradoxicalblueberry @the-regal-warrior @transparentparadiseglitterzombie @marvelgem @propertyofmarvel @avngrsinitiative @my-leg-is-not-a-chew-toy @lyricalstella-blog @just-the-daydreamer @hufflely-puffly

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