I keep seeing things about the Like Father Like Son ROTTMNT au fic but I CANT READ IT YET, IM ALREADY READING SOMETHING ELSE. IF I TRY TO READ TWO THINGS AT ONCE MY BRAIN GETS MIXED UP IM SO MADDD RGRGGRGRURHRRGYRHRGRGDHRBDGDHDBGF
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Snippets for my Clone^2 Au that I thought was funny...
in incorrect quotes style format (Clone^2 = Both my Clone Damian Au and Clone Bruce Danny aus combined)
Snippet 1: Danny and Damian meeting for the first time
Danny, avoiding Damian's katana: I don't wanna know who made you I don't wanna know who made you I don't wanna know who made you
Danny: pleASE STOP TRYING TO STAB ME
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Snippet 2: Danny and Damian meeting (Alternative)
Bby Damian: gets dropped off in the ONE city where his dad's clone is
Danny, internally: damn I don't wanna know who made you
Danny: alright little buddy, lets -- *blocks Damian's sword* please don't stab me -- let's get you something to -- *blocks Damian's sword* please don't stab me -- something to EAT
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Snippet 3: Danny checking out books in the library
Librarian: oh, are you trying to learn arabic, Mister Fenton?
Danny: oh- uh, yeah :) my parents recently,,, took in a foster kid from overseas,,,, but we found out he doesn't know english and he's having a hard time adjusting
Danny, lying (only partially) through his teeth: so I,,, thought,,, maybe it would help him acclimate to his new environment if I learned some arabic :)
Librarian: oh how sweet! let me know if you need any help, i can find you more books
Danny: thank you
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Snippet 4: Damian wants to patrol
Damian: let me come with you on patrol
Danny, 16 year old idiot who fights without powers: uh. no. you are Itty Bitty Child
Damian: comes with anyways
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Snippet 5:
Damian, trying to fight a ghost without a ghost-proof sword:
Danny, catching him and holding him against his chest: *radiating exhaustion* no,,,, no,,,,, not yet,,,,
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Snippet 6: danny has an epiphany
Danny, realizing that he needs to set an example now that Damian is coming with him on patrol: fUCK
Danny: I NEED AN ACTUAL SUIT
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Snippet 7; dynamic duo
Danny: what is it with you and batman and robin????
Damian, silently sweating: ,,,,,,,because they are exemplary partners and i would like to think that us two are the same
Danny, doesnt know identities: ...aww??? thats kinda sweet??? okay :)
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Snippet 8: hypocrite
Damian: dijaal (affectionate)
Danny, on day ?? of solving a cold case after a ghost asked him to: hrbhk - Damian, what are you doing up? it's late, you have school in the morning
Damian, staring at him deadpan: you have school too. you should go to bed
Danny: five min..utes buddy. then i'll go to bed
Damian, grabbing the back of his rolling chair and pushing him to bed: no. now.
danny, with eyebags the size of the marianna trench: ...fine. now.
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Snippet 9: ...the line
Danny, doing homework with Sam and Tucker:
Danny: *has an epiphany* wait. shit
Tucker and Sam: ...?
Danny, his head in his hands: am I Damian's dad or his brother??
Danny: wh- what do we define this???
Tucker: ... you're brothers until its funny? and then you're his dad?
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Snippet 10: learning
Danny: reading a book about learning arabic
Damian, slamming his hand down on the book to get his attention: dijaal, *points to book* kitab
Danny, frowning: what?
Damian, tapping book: kitab
Danny: ..ki..kitab? Kitab? Book?
Damian: Boog...book. *points to table* tawila
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Snippet 11: clone reveal
Damian, later after he knows enough english and months of chilling out: i am a clone.... meant to kill my original
Danny, internally: wow you don't say?
Danny, out loud:..huh. okay. thanks for telling me, uh, same here. except that last part
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Dijaal = imposter
Damian is affectionately calling Danny an imposter because danny is a clone of bruce :)
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Hello :D
You're so cool
Anyway have you thought that in your rat sons au Splinter might outlive the boys?
You're very cool :D love your stuff dude
(tw for some blood, light gore, implied overdose (kinda??))
hi copper!!! this is a fantastic question!
so obviously typical irl rats have far shorter lifespans than the average irl tortoise. according to google (yes, be awed by my spectacularly in-depth wealth of research) the average pet rat lives between 2-4 years ish, and the oldest on record lived to be about 7. meanwhile, an African spurred tortoise (Splinter's species) averages more around a 50ish year lifespan in captivity, tho is suspected to possibly exceed 75 or more in the wild.
Now, the mutation does give us a lot of wiggle room for playing with these numbers. For the rat sons boys, id say their natural lifespan probably clocks in at about 45-55 years old? definitely not old by human standards, but not young young either. (though, its also important to note that the boys were exposed to the mutagen just days after being born.)
For Splinter, meanwhile, aging is slightly more complicated. He lived the vast majority of his life as a regular normal African spurred tortoise (well, non-mutated at least. there were perhaps some shenanigans of a more mystical variety going on before he was mutated, but thats a separate matter) He was about 70ish i think? when the boys were born and they were all exposed to the mutagen. so he is already distinctly an old man turtle papa. id guess he'd probably still have another eh lets say 25-30 years after his mutation. he could probably push it a little farther even with some mystic nonsense, but when push comes to shove id say his 'natural' post-mutation lifespan would put his death like a solid decade or two before his sons.
of course, the tricky part of the matter is that theres no way for Splinter to know any of this. theres no way for him to know how the mutation affected them all, or if it even affected them all in the same way. especially since the boys dont show many physical signs of mutation for the first few years, and just kinda look like normal rats, (albeit with a more human sort of intelligence) — what sort of health standard do you hold them to? what if they simply dont show external signs of sickness or old age anymore? how do you actually know if something is wrong?
for a while there Splinter is very worried that one of his babies will just essentially reach the end of their normal rat lifespan, fall and not get up again.
so mostly, he just tries to live in the moment, enjoying whatever time he does have with his little ones, taking each day as a gift <3
still,
that fear
never
really
goes
away.....
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Bobby: Son, what do you have to say for yourself?
Buck: Is this about me and Eddie commandeering our firefighter gear for domestic use? Because I don't think I should get reprimanded for doing what you and Ma already did, Pops.
Bobby: ...
Buck, sighs: It wasn't about that, was it?
Bobby, voice strained: No, it was not.
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