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steve0discusses · 6 months

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S5 Ep 50: Tristan Hates Horses, I Think

Been a while! Tumblr’s annoying as hell changes to the text editor took a lot of wind out of my sails, ngl. It had some problems they're resolving as they go, but it was really annoying to use and to edit if you write any amount of youknow……words….

And I was talking to a friend about this, and they were like “have you tried writing it in google docs and copy pasting it after?” And I happily realized when you copy paste from google docs, it also copies the PICTURES. This has literally saved hours of my life, y'all. It has turned something that was so frustrating I didn't want to open tumblr again into something that is no longer an obstacle so I can write once more!

So lets travel to Yugi’s brain, where Tristan desperately has to make up for all the work he hasn’t done because he was just a wee tiny bit possessed.

It may be hard to pick up where Tristan is on this picture, and I hope I recorded it somewhere in OBS like 2 months ago when I finished the series because it was such a funny animation, but hot damn this boy has hops.

And you can see him there on the ground in the bottom left corner, that isn’t a rock, that’s Tristan having toppled a man with his bare hands, a man who had a sword and was sitting on an armored horse.

Can you believe this guy ran for school president? And then lost and humbly became the janitor?

Meanwhile, Joey discovered magic.

Confirmation that duel disks are made out of old tank parts.

Realizing for the first time that magic exists, they decide to peace out.

Back in the real world, Mokuba and Roland don’t know where the hell Seto went. Which is weird, I figured Seto would at least leave a note or a text message or…anything…but apparently even if he did, he just disappeared at some point down in Marik’s old living room.

So Roland and Mokuba decided that in order to find him, they would have to take a massive Boeing 747 to find their lost child.

Some kids have a motorcycle, some kids have a scooter, Mokuba just wants the most boring ass big commercial plane that is meant to sit a couple hundred people in an awkward way. That’s what Mokuba wants.

Just Mokuba things.

My bro who edits these for me wrote in huge ass letters "ROLAND SIGHTING" While saying "ROLAND ROLAND ROLAND" so I want y'all to know how much we appreciate a good Roland in this house.

Speaking of, I know it's like season 5 but...who is the other guy? He wears funny sunglasses but I have never heard his name, not once.

But this is when the plane was filled with heavenly light.

They begin to see the fight happening between Seto Kaiba (the OG Seto, the one that is cool and isn’t depressed because his not-wife died) and Bakura (who is now Zorc). Don’t ask me how the time stuff works, and why we see it now of all the times in human history, and right over Egypt in the sky. Don’t ask me why.

I assume it’s time compression shenanigans, just like FF8, so maybe it’s just every moment in time is able to see this UFO in the sky, but overall, it’s here because it looks cool. The fact that this right here is actually not a physical place, but is actually a figment of Yugi’s imagination shaped by Pharaoh’s botchy memories--is neither here nor there. Instead, it’s everywhere.

Seto is unimpressed by this, because he knows how science and timelines should work, and this wouldn’t pass Kaiba Corp inspection.

Back at the yellow palace made of cheese and mario blocks, Pharaoh is still knocked out from that time he summed all 3 dragons last episode, which to me feels like just eons ago.

But it’s OK, he’s fine now.

Typically he’d be dead, because his dragons died on the battlefield and their life force is connected to their monsters. But not only is Pharaoh 1.) already dead and 2.) the author of this universe and cannot die or this universe ceases to exist he’s 3.) got the puzzle, which means he can’t actually perma die, unlike everyone else in his court who is perma-gone.

He is not surprised by what is currently happening in Egypt’s downtown strip.

This is probably every day in Domino. Every day Seto Kaiba wakes up everyone in town with his three-headed dragon princess just because he can. Hell, Seto was doing this fight with Bakura on the top towers of Domino just this morning (or last morning…not sure if time passes in real life the same way it does in puzzle life)

The audacity of Yami right now, the one moment Yugi isn’t there to scream about ledges, this boy is leaping joyfully off that ledge.

He fuses with the dragon which gives him this familiar outfit.

I thiiiiink it’s the same outfit as Alexander season? I’ll be real with you though, I don’t really want to look it up. Either way, good to see the return of putting on a ton of armor in a card game, I don't think we've seen it Canonically since that one time Joey did it against Valon, and ever since then, Joey kind of forgot it was a thing he can just do.

But unlike Joey, Yami doesn’t take the opportunity to punch Zorc in the face, instead he just loses yet another time.

This time he didn’t even pass out, he barely even died. This is progress, truly.

But as Zorc is powering up the peepee missile to fire in Yami’s face (what a way to die!), Shadi has decided to inform us why he’s been stalking these kids for this entire show.

So there’s two ways to read this. 1.) Shadi was Hassan the entire time but had to go back in time from this moment in order to do it or 2.) Shadi possessed the power of Hassan last second so Yami could avoid death one final time.

Both of these explanations don’t fully make sense to me, I’ll be honest, because in order to know that he’ll be needed in the first place, Shadi had to know that Yami would die at this particular moment--a moment that is a different timeline than has ever existed before.

So really, Shadi was just going by a hunch. He was like “I dunno, I’ll see how this goes.” which is more in line with the Shadi we know and love.

Is it a crying shame that Shadi, who has been with us for so many seasons, and it so integral to this show had such an unceremonious death? Yeah. I feel like I didn’t quite get the closure I wanted but I’m also sort of confused as to…what happened. But I’ll leave it there because apparently we get more Shadi content in Dark Side of Dimensions.

Anyway, I have no idea if these images will even fit into a post with how how tumbler does posts nowadays, and I'll be real I had to re upload the last bit of it, which I suspect was over 15 images???? Not sure??? but we found a workaround! google docs works!

Also, Seto didn’t die today! Instead it was Shadi! For a SECOND time!

I cannot believe how freakin lucky Mana is, this girl is still kicking and if Mana survives everything I am…going to be astonished, that’s what. Mana secretly OP, who knew?

And always you can read the rest of these here

https://steve0discusses.tumblr.com/tagged/yugioh/chrono

if I turn it into a link it doesn't work right because the text editor is really, really bad. I hate it a lot. But uh...feel free to copy paste it until I can get links to cooperate.

#yugioh #photo recap #yugi muto #joey wheeler #seto kaiba #tristan taylor #ygo #bakura #yu gi oh #yami muto #S5 #Shadi

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freedfromthegalactichivemind · 2 years

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Anon ask privileges on this blog have hearby been revoked. I may re-instate them at a future time. For now, I’m pissed off and safeguarding. As for the Disk Horse:

I do not follow anti-spop. They are a blog I do not wish to follow and, normally, am disinclined to reblog from because...it’s right in the name, “anti.” As a general rule, I do not follow or very much like critical blogs / salt blogs. I participate in fandom to have fun. (And, at this point, a bit out of personal spite since Spop is, by far, THE most toxic fandom I have ever been in. I could be spending my time frolicking in the peaceful fields of Hyrule, but noooo, my brain’s gotta chew on moody magical teenagers and spacebats). I also had some people try to kick me out of fandom at one point, so I feel like it’s my duty to hold on like grim death. I am still here. I happened to be checking up on a blog I saw come up in my suggestion-feed, remembering a person as a fanfic author I liked, decided to see how they were doing, and, boom, I saw an interesting discussion where they’d reblogged anti-spop’s opinion of the series’ treatment of Kyle. The series’ treatment of Kyle is one of my pet peeves in the canon (along with Angella’s being trapped in between dimensions forever and not getting to meet a foreshadowed minotuar-princess), so I reblogged and added my two cents.

After getting home from work (covered in grease and blood and very tired) I moseyed over to check out anti-spop becaue of the anon-rumor. I scrolled through some of front-page content and didn’t see anything that stood out to me as “racist.” In fact, I saw their intro-post citing that they are Brazillian / non-white. So, I suspect they get the accusation of being “racist” a lot by people who disagree with them about Catradora, probably. A few posts down and I saw them being... very, very anti-catradora. Having once followed entrapdak-shippers, some of whom really dislike catradora who got into conflicts with catradora-shippers and seeing a lot of rawr back and forth, I did see a lot of heavy catradora-shippers flat out accuse people who did not like the ship of “racism” (because Catra is supposed to be Brazillian / hispanic or something? I don’t know). So, given the history of shipper-politics, I really do think someone was rumor-milling me because “oh, no, they follow me / look in on me and see me reblogging something from someone who hates their ship.”

Look, I’m just tired of the mess. I am not anti-anything. Maybe if someone were to start shipping Frosta with Horde Prime or something, but, in general, the shipwars in this fandom tire me and the anti-character rhetoric tires me. I honestly like all of the characters in spop. Yes, I’m a primary entrapdak-shipper and Entrapta and Hordak-fan, but.... here’s my little secret...(or not so secret if you’ve followed this blog for a while and seen the kinds of fanart I reblog)... I *don’t* hate Catra. There was one time when I borderlined on doing so when I was deep into the entrapdak-fan-hole hanging out with a lot of negative fans, but I kind of kicked myself out of it by actually re-watching the series. I like Catra, a lot. She’s a great character, very interesting and dynamic. I might keep Hordak as my evil pookie-bear, but Catra gives me a lot of feels, too. And I like Catradora. After chilling out a little and actually observing again Catra’s genuine trying-to-make-good actions in Season 5, I’m really not of the school of “Oh noes, she’s been toxic, therefore she’s toxic forever.” As someone whose gone through a butt-ton of therapy over the last year because of my own issues... I don’t believe in “toxic forever” in someone who is shown to be trying to make good. I can’t. In other words, running it back into fandom... I don’t believe that redemption applies only to tall goth warlords who were raised in cults. I’m willing to extend redemption in this fandom to everyone but Prime. (Hell, even Shadow Weaver can get redeemed with a skilled enough fanfic author)! I don’t even care how the Catra-stans have treated the Hordak-stans anymore or vice versa. Drop it. Let it go. The same for the Glimmadora-shippers or whatever. And you know what? Someone may detest your favorite ship for whatever reason. Doesn’t give them vibes they like. Maybe they interpret the characters together as toxic or whatever. It doesn’t mean that you should be making assumptions about them and spreading anon rumors about them that you can’t back up.

If the blog I reblogged from is, in fact, racist (and isn’t just “they don’t like your ship”) give me examples! Cite them! Show me posts where they’re being awful! Until then, rumors and fandom politics can eat a sack of donkey-dongs.

#spop discourse

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mandareeboo · 3 years

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SU Music Rankings

Bc I can and I wanna start some Disk Horse rip. These are all in order of preference, with explanations, etc. It’s a long bitch. That said, I’m not counting little short jingles or small joke songs like Little Butler. This is the meat and potatoes of SU music- just under 30 songs. I might do the rest if people like my takes lol.

I scored it mostly on three bases- how dear it was to my heart, how much/often I relisten to it, and also what it means to the plot. That said, little fun songs don’t automatically go farther down than big, plot-heavy songs either! It’s a strange little balance.

Special Note: I don’t dislike any of this music! I love SU and that includes its bumps and glitches. I just pick favorite children lol.

1.) Change

Was there ever a more Steven moment than when he wiped the blood off his face and kissed it into sparkles? I think not.

If “Be Wherever You Are” is an ode to young Steven, then this is teen Steven’s. Talking about change, and how much and how little it can do. How he holds his arms up for Spinel to hug him, so trusting. How he seems able to just. Break into soft tears at will, and not to be manipulative- it’s just his kind nature. The warmth in his voice. Fuck yesssss.

2.) Change Your Mind

This song is only fifty five seconds and it’s EVERYTHING to me. It really felt like someone was speaking the words I’d always held deep inside of me, unsure of how to say. It feels like a goodbye to someone who never really loved me.

As much as I enjoyed Future, if this was the finale of SU, I would’ve been perfectly okay with that.

3.) Drift Away

This song gave me legitimate shivers the first time I heard it, and it still haunts me to this day. Spinel stayed, and waited, and all she got was a transmission thousands of years later. Fuck.

4.) Here We Are In The Future

THE MOVIE IS SU AS ITS BEST AND I WON’T BE SWAYED ON IT. Steven being a teen who loves his weird family but is growing just a bit sarcastic to their drama. The adorable love he and Connie share. His slow realization that he will always be working, always have things to do, is both somber and real. The Crystal Gems won’t be safe with one epic battle. They’ll be safe with years of hard work and love. HIS LITTLE HANDSHAKE WITH AMETHYST.

This is a helluva bop and a great way to summarize the main character’s backstories.

5.) Let’s Only Think About Love

Did ya’ll know that Zach Callison killed his throat with that last note? He gave his all for this performance in a vocal range he no longer comfortably do and by god did it SHINE. The FLAIR. The FORESHADOWING. All of the Gems all being awkward about Rose and Steven trying to bring them to the present. Peridot having a mini-existential crisis in a cute yellow dress. I love Zach Callison’s normal singing voice but man is that a fucking bop. Nothing will ever beat it.

6.) Here Comes A Thought

This bad boy helped me out a LOT with some mental issues I was dealing with in high school. I was unmedicated, unsupervised, and full of anxiety. I’d have break downs when I tried to speak about certain things. I couldn’t function. This song inspired me. It helped me feel okay with my intrusive thoughts.

And the episode! -chef’s kiss-. Once again bringing up the morally gray area of training child soldiers. Connie expanding her social group. Steven’s trauma hauling ass in that second half. The ANIMATION. Stevonnie’s gorgeous singing voice. GOD yes.

7.) It’s Over Isn’t It?

Just barely squeaking above Stronger Than You, this ballad is everything gorgeous. The whole episode is. I think Mr. Greg stands in the top five of my episodes for the entire show. It even got nominated!

There’s just so much about this song that I love. The gentle melancholy of Pearl’s voice. How the crew had to redo the shots for this bit bc Deedee went so fucking hard. The hard cuts between Pearl, remembering the love of her life, and Steven, who has begun to feel like he took her away. I’d recommend this song to anyone, regardless of what they do or don’t know about SU, simply bc it tugs so many heartstrings of love, loss, and responsibility.

8.) Stronger Than You

Did you realize this episode aired SEVEN years ago? This bitch was what got me into SU! Hearing about Ruby and Sapphire made my little gay heart so happy inside, and then getting a whole song confirming that they were a couple, that their love powered the strongest Gem on the team? Aaaaaaaaa

To this DAY I get excited when I hear Estelle start singing. This song is timeless. This song will live in media history. God I fucking love this song.

9.) Other Friends

I’m not the biggest musical person, so I hadn’t heard of Sarah Stiles before her casting as Spinel, but JESUS CHRIST the lady went hard. She went SO fucking hard. Sarah Stiles started on 100 and somehow just kept CLIMBING. You can just hear the sheer manic energy building in her voice, the anger and resentment. 10/10 Sarah Stiles is a queen.

10.) Independent Together

This made the list entirely bc the crew was like “you’re gonna get a himbo ass Steven-Greg fusion singing with Opal while Garnet flies across the moon on Lion while floating” and I am forever thankful to them for it

11.) Who We Are

Bismuth deserved more songs. ‘Nuff said.

12.) Peace and Love (On the Planet Earth)

It Could’ve been Great is EASILY one of my favorite s2 episodes. I love the entire concept of this song. Of Steven making music to reflect how much Earth means to him and his family. Of him teaching Peridot some self-care. Also Peridot’s singing voice is really cute and squeaky.

I know it’s silly, but I would’ve really enjoyed a flip around of this in Future! Like Peridot reminding Steven how much he loves music, that he needs to take time to relax for himself, maybe with a new verse or just a remix of the original song!

13.) Something Entirely New

I watched this episode as it aired, and I legitimately almost cried. I love Charlyne Yi’s voice so much ya’ll- her raspy, not perfect singing voice against Sapphire’s deep soothing lull is great.

And to have Ruby and Sapphire’s meeting be the way it was- for Ruby to bemoan Sapphire losing Homeworld, to being stuck with a single Ruby, while Sapphire is a noble who has always been taught everyone in her “caste” is vitally important (and has, in her own mind, taken that to mean every Gem, as she should) and how they come together and make each other happy. Good shit good shit.

14.) I’m Just a Comet

The fact that Greg’s music career never really blasted off pisses me off to this day bc Tom Scharpling’s voice is fucking BUTTER. Also the song really feels like a jab at his parents now that we know the kind of dynamic he had growing up. “This life in the stars if all I’ve ever known” is definitely him wiping away their existence after reminding them (and himself) the things they used to say about him.

15.) Do It For Her

This episode. This fucking episode. This episode got me permanently hooked on SU. I’d just binged season 1 and was kinda meh about it overall after the bop of Stronger Than You. “Oh,” I thought to myself, foolishly, “I’ll probably just casually watch this from time to time.”

Like three days later Sworn to the Sword aired and that was it. I was hooked! Pearl’s gentle training song turning darker and darker, Connie’s accompaniment from nervous to determined to fully into such a toxic mindset. The fact that SU had the BALLS to discuss the repercussions of training child soldiers, now and later. This episode was everything to me, STILL is everything to me.

Six years and well over 100 fanfics written later, I think it’s safe to say this show swallowed me whole and never let go.

16.) System/Boot.pearl_final(3)

I debated putting this on the list because it’s not anything crazy important, just a way to show things are Wrong, but I had to do it entirely bc Pearl is so damn SALTY.

Like telling us about the Gems makes sense, she felt like she was given a duty, but she went so damn petty. WHY is that Ruby alone. Gross. This Amethyst is a trash dump. Wtf are you people.

17.) Full Disclosure

This episode really feels like a turning point for SU. Before, the show had its dark moments- but now we’re in the thick of it, and it’s not going away. Full Disclosure felt like an rebuff to the idea of returning to any normal we’d established in season 1. Gems are actually a giant species now. Gems tried to kill us now. There’s this Yellow Diamond bitch who got namedropped. Something about a Cluster.

The song itself is BALLER, with its ingenious use of Steven’s ringtone and photos as he tries to decide whether to clue in Connie on all this nonsense. Meanwhile we, the audience, already know damn well Connie about to yeet some common sense into him.

18.) What’s the Use of Feeling Blue?

I’mma admit it- I’m a Yellow Diamond stan. I’ve always loved her- her anger, her poise, her hardworking nature. I actively argued against the “Yellow Shattered Pink” theories back in the day. But, man, when this arc leaked? I got so overexcited I was too jittery to watch it for like two days. It’s easily my favorite arc of the series. The sheer alien nature of the zoo, the Famethyst, and absolutely Patti Lupone’s beautiful ballad. Goddamn. Yellow singing to Blue to try and help her regain her old status, the warble in her voice as she reminds Blue she misses Pink too, the movement of the bubbles as she talks about attack. It gives me shivers to this day. FUCK.

19.) Tower of Mistakes

This is, fun fact, that only SU song I have completely memorized. The story itself is kinda funny! See, we lost internet at my house for a solid 5 to 6 months when these episodes aired, so I only got a very brief window to view them all. But this was the first Amethyst song in a long while, and I didn’t want to forget it! So I keep replaying it in my head for ages. And that’s still definitely a thing.

Anyway will never not be sad that this entire song was about making it up to Garnet for Amethyst’s perceived slights with Sugilite (which was a two-way road), only for Garnet to pressure her into fusion later when pissed and never discuss it again bc Garnet probably never thought twice about it and Amethyst has the emotional openness of a clam that’s just been told its ugly. Helluva way to make someone feel like shit, G. Helluva way to bottle that shit, Ames.

20.) On the Run

I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a million times: Amethyst! Needed! More! Songs!

The dichotomy between Steven’s play and Amethyst’s honest desire to run away from home is so well-done, especially when you consider a lot of Steven and Amethyst’s actions are playing together. The song is also near and dear to me simply bc it’s my favorite Amethyst episode to exist (well, maybe second to What’s Your Problem, but not by much). Moments like these are all the proof I need that they were right to fuse first.

21.) Be Wherever You Are

This tune really just feels like an ode to who Steven was as a kid. Trapped on an island with no way home, and he’s just happy to be with his friends. The stars are beautiful and not oppressive. Also that one animatic with Lars and the Off Colors playing in the Homeworld Kindergarten to this music was iconic and made this song get stuck in my head for a solid month.

22.) Familiar

I ADORE how the crew use bright neon colors to show how alien Homeworld can be. And Steven recognizing that the Diamonds treat him how the CGs used to, and how prepared he is to “fix” a broken family. It’s a soft, gentle tune about melancholy. Also the Pebbles are beautiful.

23.) Let Me Drive My Van Into Your Heart

Such a cute little love ballad, but every time I listen to it now I just imagine the heart attack Rose must’ve had at the line “And if we look out of place/Well, baby, that's okay/I'll drive us into outer space.” like there’s a Vietnam war flashback if I ever heard one

24.) What Can I Do?

I’m kind of neutral on this one? Rose and Greg both have great voices, but the song itself lacks many lyrics. I think it was definitely a good way to show Rose’s flaws in thinking.

Also, I’m shocked they managed cram that much vaguely sexual innuendo into two minutes, followed by how Not Hetereo that dance between Rose and Pearl was, and not get their asses chewed by it. You go guys.

25.) Cookie Cat

I love a lot of the vibes this song has. The lyrics are so damn prophetic, but they also sound like the kind of weird 90s commercials I grew up on. It’s been like two decades since I saw the Shirley Temple commercial but I’ll be damned if I don’t remember “Animals crackers in my soup! Monkey and rabbits loop-de-loop.”

26.) Giant Woman

I am. NOT the biggest fan of Steven’s original singing voice. I feel bad saying that, since it was just Zach Callison as a kid, but he never jived well with me for some reason. So I wouldn’t listen to this on the fly.

The song itself is still really good though, with all sorts of fun animation of Amethyst and Pearl being bitchy to each other. It’s a bit sad in hindsight to see tiny Steven trying to get his moms to get along. Ahh, season 1.

27.) Strong in the Real Way

This song has SUCH a strong start. Pearl reflecting on Sugilite’s problems, but the show making sure to show us that Pearl’s lack of enthusiasm towards her also lends itself to jealousy as well as just general malaise. How much she cares about Steven, and wants him to grow up strong.

And then Steven just kinda. Ruins it? I appreciate his enthusiasm for tryna bulk up but to take what was starting as such a rich, personal song and broadcasting it to random strangers just makes me a bit sad. Almost a bit angry on her behalf?

28.) That Distant Shore

I KNOW this is gonna create some discourse, but I’m just not the biggest Lapis stan. I love her voice. I love the visuals of the song. And I get why she felt afraid and needed to flee.

But Lapis never got to take responsibility for her own actions. And, in the end, the song feels hollow to me- because we all know she’ll never talk to anyone about it, know she’ll burst back in and destroy the barn, and no one will ever question it. I like Lapis a lot, but I feel like her arc never was fully finished. She never got help. She never learned to feel safe.

29.) Dear Old Dad

I’ve yet to meet a single human being who likes this episode tbh. There’s some great discussion about what kind of parent Greg is from it, and what kind of dynamic he has with the Gems that he felt he had to fake an injury to hang out with his son. Honestly the first half was fine and dandy. It’s just that then they Greg just went out of his way to drag Steven away from missions and such. It never jived well with his character before or after.

Also, is it just me, or does Zach himself sound like he hates the song as he sings it? There’s no passion or heart in his voice. It sounds like they told him to read off cue cards and he did. Tom Scharpling’s best attempts didn’t save this one for being a skipper. But the episode, unfortunately, isn’t, so it gets a spot on here.

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stellocchia · 3 years

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Ok, I've somehow seen quite a few people around saying some things that I just cannot agree with, so let's discuss them:

1) Tommy had no character development. He's a stale character. I'm gonna guess this people have never seen a Tommy stream or a stream involving Tommy at all. This boy has sacrificed so much and changed so much I'm shocked at how many people don't seem to see it.

Let's analyse this from yesterday's stream: he finally gave up the disks after realizing that they really aren't worth his friendships, he apologized multiple times for the things he's done, he recognizes that he's done some awful stuff and that he was becoming someone he didn't want to and actively decided to change his course of action (it is to be pointed out that he and Ranboo are literally the only characters who admitted to their wrongdoings, everyone else still acts like they're on this moral high horse, which is kind of frustrating), at the bench he admitted that, no matter what he's been through, it's not an excuse for his actions. Also he immediately took charge in trying to protect his old friends and the country that threw him out and left him to die trying to left any grudges aside in favour of working towards their common goal. Old Tommy would never have done that! Remember he refused Eret's help multiple times even when he was exiled with Wilbur because of his betrayal? This boy has changed...

2) He betrayed Techno. No he didn't. He was clear with Techno from the start about not wanting to harm Tubbo or destroy L'Manburg. What happened there is that neither of them listened to the other, they both knew their objectives didn't align, but they thought they could change each other mind.

This is obvious when Tommy asks Techno: "You're not really siding with Dream are you?" Or something along those lines. Also it is to be pointed out that Techno did say that he still respected Tommy and that he would respect his decision (which is honestly the most character development we've seen from Techno so far...) and also one more little detail: Techno was siding with Tommy's past abuser! How could Techno think Tommy would be on board with that? He saw the effects of Dream's influence on him! (This is honestly just so frustrating to me...)

3) Niki did nothing wrong. I'm sorry, I know this is controversial and I probably should look at her vod, so my opinion may change later on but, for now though, Niki what the Hell was that?!

Let's start from how everyone immediately believed Dream's accusations, no questions asked. Tommy was right in being angry that no-one (aside from Techno and later Ranboo) stood up for him. Hell, they all still believed Dream after he literally admitted to manipulating Tubbo for the disk, to the fact that he literally only cared about the disk and the fact that his objective was to destroy L'Manburg from the start! He basically told them all to their faces that he was using and manipulating them and they all still went: "yep, seems trustworthy to me!"... are you kidding me?!

So, if everyone was acting so extremely dumb, why am I singling out Niki? Because of the way she attacked Tommy mostly, it was just so hypocritical. She was in the revolution, she saw him fight for L'Manburg, time and time again. And sure, he made a mistake, burned down George's house (which was an accident by the way) and he got punished for it! She knows he'd been exiled because they met before now in canon. He already paid for his actions! Heck, he's literally the only one on the server who ever had any official repercussions for his actions! And still she blames him for all of their problems! The guy who, once more, was willing to give up everything, including his last life, for people who, honestly, don't deserve it one bit. She blamed him constantly, said that he was nothing but a lier (sure he didn't admit immediately to his crime when he burned down George's house, but he did at the end! And that was the only time he lied in an important way! Come on! Plus, as I said before, he already paid for his crimes!)

Also Tommy hasn't been in L'Manburg in months in smp time, and everything fell apart anyway, it just feels very unfair to blame him for everything. Especially when you have Dream right there, admitting to be a manipulative ass and wanting to destroy everything! And especially after you have a 16 year old child-soldier telling everyone in a very obvious way that Dream abused him in exile. (He didn't state it directly, but it was impossible not to understand). At this point it just really feels like victim blaming. I'm sorry, maybe I'm misunderstanding Niki's character, admittingly I don't watch her, so feel free to correct me if I missed something big, but that's just how it felt.

Some last few considerations:

I'm gonna admit I'm sad Techno and Tommy split apart. I loved them together and I really don't think L'Manburg deserves Tommy right now... because it is true that they threw him out at the first hardship they encountered and then left him to die, it is true that they never really tried to get him back and it's true that they never stood up for him. Time and time again they forced him in the position of the hero and then acted like that was just what he owed them, but it isn't. He doesn't owe them his life, he doesn't owe them his loyalty, he didn't even owe them his disks! But this is Tommy's choice (even Techno recognized) and he chose to, once again, be selfless. He could have stayed with Techno and chose the easy path, the safe path, but he decided to stand up for what he believes in and fight for his ideals and I think that's something we can all respect in a character.

I hope the others (especially the adults... please don't let the literal kids of the server be the only rational ones...) will be able to put their grudges aside and fight together for the greater good... but I have the feeling they'll fall apart. So adamant in not being on Tommy's side that they'll end up helping Dream take over. Also I'm so afraid for Ranboo and Tommy right now, I feel like at least one of them isn't gonna survive today (either that or Ranboo will switch sides).

Also, Punz is not gonna betray them in this battle, or at least, that wasn't the plan he and Dream had. Dream was planning to do something big that would force him to leave for a while and was planning to leave Punz there as his spy on the inside. Their plan is going swimmingly so far...

(Also, on a little note, I love how supportive and understanding Fundy was of Ranboo after the reveal of his "betrayal". He thinks Ranboo was right, he still trusts him and I just... their friendship just makes me so soft and it's honestly my favourite relationship in the smp)

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salty-stories · 3 years

Text

Mini Update!

Hey y’all!

I, yet, live and breathe! Sorry about the semi-but not really-hiatus, I’m still on break from working on IF and being active on the blog. Although, I’ve been good about popping in and refreshing the queue and reblogging what new if stuff happens across my dash(there’s so many good new wips out there and I’m starting to lose track of them all, gotta make spreadsheet lol)

August has been a bit of a break month for me. I’ve been traveling, working on academic projects, and settling into life in a new place. So writing has been….pretty much nonexistent but that’s okay! I’ve decided I’m not gonna punish myself for not producing every free moment and take things slow for now.

That said! I have used this break to sit back and work on Stygian’s plot. I finally have the central conflict all planned out and I’m so excited to introduce the game’s kinda-villain. Although, I announced Stygian back in February, progress on the demo is a bit stalled. I’ve roughly coded her ui and written the prologue and a portion of the first chapter, but I want to release a good chunk of narrative with the initial demo. So, all of that will have to wait until the LaF update, etc.

Also! Some last bit of Stygian news: I just got the line-art for the ro portraits I commissioned a while ago and the urge to yeet them into the void is so strong! I like can’t stop looking at them, ahhhhhh can not wait to share them when they’re finished👀👀

Also, Also! Been just consuming a bunch of IF lately(including VNs, which I missed playing) Here’s some I’ve really enjoyed:

Attollo by @attollogame - Finally caught up the new update and AMES!!! Your mind, I swear!!!! If you love horror, intricate worlds, and pitch-perfect characterization, then you gotta read Attollo!!

Body Count by @bodycountgame - No one should be surprised as I’m the president of Nell’s fan club and I reiterate, YOUR MIND NELL!!! Playing Chapter 2 after being disappointed by this year’s Love Island was everything!!

Boyfriend Dungeon - Disk Horse aside(please be kind to yourself and read the content warnings, if not the one in the game but the ones online by other players before diving in<3), this was so much fun! I really enjoyed the wielding your partner and trusting in one another aspect, a la Pacific Rim. The combat isn’t super grindy like other roguelikes and the music and graphic are very cute! I really rec it, if you’re okay with the st*lk*ng plot device

Celestia by @jelpiparade - A REGENCY FANTASY VN!!! That’s really all that needs to be said but I’ll go on^^ I’m in love with everything the dev’s have made but this one’s art style and setting really blew me away. If the idea of people representing celestial bodies and regency conventions without the bigotry appeals to you, then I really rec this!

Crosshollow Foundations by @townofcrosshollow - The UI!! The Prose!! Loved it! Super excited to read more!! I also really rec that y’all check out; 13 Laurel Rd and Angel in the Aspens

The Eight Years Revolution by @eight-years-revolution - Also finally caught up on 8yr and (I’m sounding like a parrot but!) your mind, Oscar!!! Also the game looks so amazing, especially on mobile!!

Tailor Tales by @celiannac - I recently stumbled on this game after playing it and not really feeling it a few years ago and found myself really enjoying it now! Its got a fashion design mini game component to the traditional visual novel narrative that can feel repetitive but I found it really fun(brought me back to those younger days playing dress up barbie games online) and there’s a few different routes and ros to choose from. As always be sure to read the content warnings before playing as some routes deal with heavy themes! I will say that I really appreciated how detailed and thorough each route’s content warnings are; you can even see additional warnings related to content which made me feel safe and trust the narrative!

A Tale of Crowns by @ataleofcrowns - You don’t need me to tell you how amazing Chapter 7 was but I’m gonna do it anyway^^ I can’t even begin to imagine the branching going on behind the scenes but I loved seeing where all our choices lead and the description of ceremony was beautiful!! I lost my old saves but it was honestly worth playing multiple times, absolutely loved it!!

September is around the corner and I’m gonna get back to work! Don’t know how writing if and doing school at the same time is gonna go but we’re gonna do our best! Hope everyone is staying happy and healthy!!!<3

#sorry for all the tags and rambling <3 your works pls do not percieve me sksksks #also going thru a bit of anime phase but y'all don't need to know my trash dfkhsgk #salty talks #devlog #kinda #interactive fiction

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crowsmybeloveds · 3 years

Text

Shadow and Bone Series: Chapter Five

Fluorescent Adolescent

Pairing: Jesper Fahey x Reader

Summary: Y/N starts to grow into her role within the Crows.

Word Count: 5.3k

Warnings: Past (physical, emotional, sexual) abuse; Drug use; canon typical violence; roofies; Pekka Rollins; the Menagerie

A/N: thank you guys so much for the response on the last chapter!!! I’m so bad at responding to stuff but I read and obsessed over every comment and reblog!! (As always feel free to comment like reblog ask whatever toots ur horn)

Masterlist

“I don’t know, Jes,” Y/N gulped. “It looks like it’s super heavy.”

“That sounds like something a loser would say.” Jesper replied, smirking at her.

The pair was staring up into the window of a large apartment, where a golden music machine was sitting. They had spoken about it before, and Y/N was absolutely enamored with them. They were Fabrikator made to create music when a disk was placed on them. She thought it was incredible. Now, Jesper was trying to get her to help him steal one.

“A loser?” She replied, annoyed. “That’s a lame insult.”

“I don’t know,” He laughed lightheartedly. “You seem pretty insulted.”

Y/N rolled her eyes and looked back at the window. The machine looked just like ones she had read about in books, where they were called magnetovon, but she and Jesper agreed golden music machine was a better name. “Seriously, though, how are we going to get it out of there?”

“Do not fret, milady.” Jesper smiled as he spoke in an exaggerated accent. “I had to carry many heavy things at the farm as a mere youngster.”

Y/N laughed. “First of all, lose the accent. Second of all, what farm?”

Jesper cleared his throat, and for a moment she was worried she had hit a soft spot, but he soon spoke up. “I grew up on one, in Novyi Zem.”

“Really?” She asked, a shocked expression on her face.

“Why is that so odd to you?” He laughed at her wide eyes.

“I mean, you just seem like a city boy, is all. You know, with the rings and the card games…”

It was Jespers turn to roll his eyes. “Oh, because I have good taste in jewelry means I can’t be from a farm?”

“No, it’s fine. I accept it.” She told him. “I just have a few questions.”

“Shoot.”

She smirked. “Do you get teary-eyed at the sight of hay bales?”

His smile dropped. “Shut up.”

“No,” She barely made it through her words, laughing too much. “I don’t think I will. Does the smell of horse manure remind you of home, country boy?”

Jesper cringed. “Gross, you cannot call me that.”

“Call you what, country boy?”

“Are you serious?”

“As murder,” She replied triumphantly. “You call me all sorts of nicknames, so it’s only fitting that you have one.”

“And you’ve decided on country boy?” He asked, shaking his head.

“I’ve decided on country boy.”

A few hours later, on the other side of the Barrel, Inej sat in the common area of the Slat, going over plans Kaz had given her. She was interrupted by muffled bickering coming toward the door.

“I’m just saying it’s not even creative. It took you like three seconds to come up with it.” Jesper argued as he came through the door with Y/N. They were each holding one side of a large golden machine. Inej tilted her head, looking at them. What on earth did those two do?

“Yes, it’s so unoriginal, but look at how riled it’s got you!” Y/N exclaimed as they set the machine down. She sighed and dusted off her hands, looking at it like it was her greatest achievement. “Now we just need to find some of the music disk things.”

Jesper loudly sighed. “It’s just one thing after another with you, isn’t it? Where do you get all that energy?”

Y/N gulped. “I don’t know.” She lied through her teeth. The jurda that she had been taking was also a stimulant, which many people used to stay awake.

“Did you steal a magnetovon?” Inej asked, confused. The pair turned toward her, just noticing she was there.

Jesper furrowed his brow. “Why do you assume we stole it?”

“Are you seriously asking me that?” Inej said as she bit back a laugh.

“Yes, we stole it. But look at it.” Y/N rushed out her words, clearly excited. “It’s beautiful, and once we get some of those disks -“

“Zapisi?”

“Yes, that’s what they are called!” She snapped her fingers at the revelation. “Once we find those, we can have music.”

Inej shrugged. “Sounds nice.”

Y/N rushed to sit down next to Inej, talking to her all about the machine and the different types of music they could find. Jesper watched on.

In all honesty, Jesper was not totally convinced that the machine was as interesting as Y/N thought it was, but, when he saw how excited it made her, he knew it was his goal to get one. Ever since they had spoken about it from her window at the Emerald Palace, he looked in the windows of every wealthy man’s house when he was walking around the city, hoping to see one. He had been ecstatic when he finally found one, rushing to find her before dragging her back to the house to see it. The way her eyes lit up and she smiled when she looked at it made his heart stutter. He never wanted her to ever look different. So, with her help, he lugged the stupid thing all the way back to the Slat, just so that her smile might last a bit longer.

Inej and Y/N were deep in conversation, so they didn’t notice him slip out the door. If it was music his girl wanted, it was music she was going to get. He didn’t care if it might cost him an arm and a leg. He searched many of the stands surrounding the Crow Club, looking for the discs the girls had described.

He knew that if he was going to avoid his feelings for her, he should probably spend less time with her, and end their flirting, but he couldn’t bring himself to stop. Being around her made him feel electric, and he was sure he would never get enough of it. It was for this reason he searched every stand he could find for those stupid music discs.

They were absolutely nowhere to be found. He knew that they would be expensive and hard to come by, but now he was doubting that they even existed. He found himself back outside of the apartment from which they had stolen the golden music machine, wondering if they had any inside. He could hear the sounds of people moving around inside, so going in was not an option. He sighed, looking around the alley.

At the far end of the alley, there was a large pile of trash. On the top of it was a bag, which had large black discs falling off of it. Jesper perked up and practically sprinted down the street to see if it was the zapisi he was looking for. He looked in the bag, finding around ten discs that looked exactly like how Y/N had described them.

“Yes!” He shouted in triumph, ignoring the odd looks he got from people on the street. He slung the bag over his shoulder and ran back to the Slat, excited to show his findings to Y/N and Inej.

When he got there, he found both of them asleep on the same couch they had been on before he left. He chuckled. Y/N must have talked herself into exhaustion. He smiled at them and then turned to the machine, determined to figure out how it worked.

As he lowered the needle on to the disc, he crossed his fingers, praying he might have figured it out on his first try. It spun for a few moments and then —

“What the fuck!” Y/N was awoken by the loud sounds coming from the music room. Jesper hadn’t realized that the volume was all of the way up. The room shook with every beat. Now Inej and Y/N were awake, and everyone in the room was screaming.

“Saints! Jesper, make it stop!” Inej shouted, covering her ears.

Y/N ran over to the machine and turned a dial on it, making it play the music much more softly.

“Yeah,” Jesper said, out of breath. “That’s much better.”

Y/N smiled at him, “You bought zapisi?”

“I found zapisi.”

She once again stared at the machine. There’s that smile. Jesper thought. Worth it. She moved to sit down in front of the machine, putting a new song on it and letting it play. A soft song filled the room. She closed her eyes and sighed contentedly. “I can die happy now.”

Inej rolled her eyes, but smiled at her two friends. She was happy that Y/N was able to find happiness within the Dregs. She also thought that she and Jesper were idiots. They were both totally enraptured with each other, but neither did anything about it. It was ridiculous. She rested her head on the arm rest at the end of the couch, watching them.

Jespers eyes sparkled as he watched the girl on the ground. He tapped his foot to the rhythm of the music. “Y/N, you know this is a waltz, right?”

“Like the dance?”

“Yes.” He replied. “Do you know how to?”

She turned to him and shook her head.

“Here, I’ll teach you.” He reached out a hand for her to grab. Noticing her hesitation, he reached further. “Come on, it’ll be fun.”

“If you say so,” she spoke in a nervous voice, reaching for his hand. He lifted her up onto her feet. And used his other hand to grab her by her waist. She tried not to look flustered from being so close to him.

Jesper stared into her eyes and gulped. “Right, so you move with the beat. 1, 2, 3. You hear it?”

“Yes,” she responded, staring at her feet.

“Okay, so it’s like this: step forward, to the side, and then backwards.” Jesper smiled at how concentrated she was as she mirrored his steps. “Yeah, just like that.”

“Oh sorry,” She mumbled, as she accidentally stepped on his foot.

“No problem, gorgeous.” He gently reassured her. “Once you get good at this, we can do it in circles how you are supposed to.”

They continued their steps along with the music, Inej watching on. The day had finally faded into a dark night, and there was a small rainstorm occurring outside. For a dingy room in the middle of the Barrel, it was a rather blissful atmosphere.

The sound of Kaz’s cane filled the room, as he opened the door and began to walk in. He stopped in his tracks when her heard the music, looking up to see what was going on. He looked at Inej, raising an eyebrow. When she shrugged, he turned toward the rest of his Crows, examining their dancing with a meticulous, judging gaze. “You’re doing that wrong.”

Jesper and Y/N didn’t respond, off in their own world.

“Leave them alone,” Inej whispered as Kaz sat down in a chair next to the couch. “They’re having fun.”

They looked on at the dancing pair in silence. Adorable as the sight was, it left a pit in both of their stomachs. They both had similar thoughts in their mind. Something I might never have.

Jesper and Y/N had long since abandoned their mechanical steps, and were now spinning around with no real motive. She giggled as he spun her dramatically. When she arrived back at her original position, she looked up at him grinning. They were even closer than they were before. She looked at his lips. He’s really pretty.

Jesper, on the other hand, was trying his best to ignore his feelings for her, but it was becoming harder and harder with each passing second. Her closeness was becoming overwhelming, so he had spun her. When she ended up even closer, he felt like he was struggling to get enough air. I want to kiss her. He fought to keep himself from cringing. Absolutely not. She deserves better.

When the music stopped, they were both broken from their trancelike state. She stared up at him, taking a deep breath. He let go of her, stepping away and quickly turning toward the stairs. “Goodnight, Y/N.” He called, not even stopping to turn and wave goodbye. He quickly made his way to his room, sitting down on his cot and putting his head in his hands.

Y/N stood there, frozen and confused. Did she cross a boundary? Was he ok? What just happened? She turned to see Kaz and Inej staring at her.

“I, um,” she pointed at the stairs. “Yeah. Upstairs.”

Kaz and Inej watched as she rushed up the stairs, taking them two at a time.

When Y/N arrived at Jesper’s door, she gave it a few gentle taps. “Jes, are you alright?”

On the other side of the door, Jesper raised his head out of his hands, which were now shaking. No, I’m not alright. I’m fucking in love with you and it’s tearing me apart. “Yeah, I just remembered something I had to do.”

“Oh,” Y/N replied, “what is it?”

He opened the door and she backed away from it. He was dressed in his coat and top hat. He’s leaving. “I completely forgot I promised someone a coffee date at 11 bells.” He sighed, slightly impressed with his own lie. “I have to go, I’m already late.”

His insides twisted at the betrayed look on her face that she was trying to hide. Just get out. He thought. You’ll feel better with cards in your hand.

“Right,” she plastered a fake smile on her face. “Well, have fun!”

He gave a tight smile and made his way down the stairs. She stood there until she heard the slam of the door from the bottom floor. I must have freaked him out. She thought. Who would want a girl like me? I’m already spent.

She noticed her hands shaking and made her way up to her room above his. She closed the door behind her, and rushed to her work table, searching it for any traces of her jurda she could take. Tears formed in her eyes when she couldn’t find a single trace of her medicine, or even just a petal from the flower she used to make it. She slammed a hand down on her table before moving to open the drawers underneath. Again finding nothing, she searched her wallet. It was empty. She sighed, letting the tears fall. With shaking hands she opened the bottom drawer, taking out a small jar labeled “Anais.” She grabbed a wad of kruge from the jar and sighed. This is so fucking pathetic.

She rushed down the stairs, grabbing her coat from where she had left it on the couch before making her way out the door. Kaz and Inej’s questions of where she was going were left unanswered.

That night, when Jesper arrived in his room, he could hear movements coming from the room above him. He sighed at the sound, sitting down on his cot. He knew she overworked herself to distract from pain. He knew it hurt her to be abandoned, and it hurt him to leave. But he wasn’t the person she needed him to be, and he wasn’t sure if he ever could be. Running away was difficult, but somehow also the easiest way to deal with it.

Jesper woke up next morning with a pounding headache and even worse heartache. He saw a small note slid under the door, written in purple ink. He unfolded it and read.

Thank you for helping me get music. Sorry if I suck at waltzing.

- Y/N

He wished she understood why he had run. He wished he knew how to explain it. The pit in his stomach dug itself deeper.

~~~~~~~~~

Once a week, Y/N took Inej out to get muffins, if time and money allowed. She claimed it was her way of paying Inej back for taking a chance on her at the Emerald Palace. If Inej had never decided to help Y/N instead of allowing Kaz to simply kill her as soon as he knew she existed, Y/N would have been long gone. So, she bought Inej muffins, just like the muffin Inej had brought her when they met at the window for the first time.

They would go to a different baker each time, hoping to become, as Y/N put it, “the best muffin connoisseurs in all of Kerch!” Then, they would take their baked goods back to the Slat, sitting on Inej’s window ledge while they ate. The view of the Barrel from there made it seem much nicer, as if it was made of lanterns and starlight instead of blood and grime. They could also see the sea, which brought in a nice breeze. It was an easy spot to find comfort in.

“It was weird.” Inej nodded. They had been speaking about Jespers sudden actions a few nights prior. She waved her hand as she spoke. “He just ran off.”

“I know. He said he had a date, though.” Y/N replied. “He was running late?”

“Oh, I’m sorry.” Inej looked at her with wide, pitiful eyes.

“Why? I know better than to expect him to like me. Saints, I just figured out I like him, I can get over it.”

Inej raised her eyebrows. “Whatever you say…”

Y/N shook her head, laughing as she picked up her muffin. “Oh, fuck off!”

Inej started laughing as well, but her smile faded when she noticed her friend's nails. They were stained orange. “Oh, have you been working with jurda a lot?”

Y/N tensed. “What?”

“Your nails?”

“Oh, yeah. It’s a pretty powerful plant, it makes my job a lot easier.” Y/N tried to play it off, but she knew Inej didn’t really believe her.

“What did you make?” Inej asked, taking another bite of a muffin.

Y/N raised a finger to her mouth. “It’s a secret. Not finished yet.”

They both knew she was lying, and Y/N could tell Inej was not going to let it go. Inej was very smart, possibly smarter than she was, so she knew she wasn’t getting out of this.

Inej had given up on questioning. “If you ever need something, I can help.”

The words punched Y/N in the gut. She had been acting like she was being interrogated by the stadwatch when it was really just a worried friend. “I know, Inej. It’s just hard.”

Inej hummed and went back to eating her muffin. They finished their baked goods in awkward silence and then bid each other goodnight.

~~~~~~~~~~

It was past twelve bells, and Y/N was seated at her mirror in her room at the Slat, furiously rubbing at the skin on her cheek, when a tapping sound came from her window. She wiped tears from her eyes and turned toward the noise to see Jesper in her window. He spread his arms and smiled.

It had been a few days since he ran off on her to go on a date. Neither of them understood how much the incident hurt each other, and they hadn’t talked about it. It was likely they never would.

If Jesper was still Jesper, he would just be himself and act like time had healed them. Y/N would play along.

“Come on, love. Let me in!” His voice was muffled as it made its way through the glass.

She stood up and walked over to him. She put her face close to the window and tilted her head.

“Why should I, country boy?”

“Easy,” He pointed at himself, “Because you’re in love with this face.”

Her heart sped up. Not just a joke, Jesper.

“I can see it from here.” She quipped, but still opened her window to let him in.

He jumped in, “But it’s better in this lighting, huh? I missed you, petal.” He held her face in both hands.

She flinched at his contact with her cheek that she had rubbed raw. She moved his hands down, hoping he wouldn’t notice. “It’s been like, two days since I last saw you.”

“I still missed you.” He had noticed her discomfort. “Did you hurt yourself, love?”

“Don’t worry about it.”

She moved to sit back down in front of her mirror. Jesper furrows his brows, hesitating in following her.

“Listen, I may not be the smartest in the Barrel. Saints, I’m not even the smartest person in this room,” he wiped at his brow. “But I’m not stupid enough to ignore whatever is going on here.” He gestured toward her as he walked over. “What’s wrong?”

“I, uh,” She held up a book, “Was practicing.”

Jesper looked at the book, “This is from the University library, did you steal it?”

She made a face at him. “No I enrolled,” she said sarcastically, “Yes, Jesper, of course I stole it.”

“The Science of Grisha Tailoring.” He said, making his voice sound posh and regal. “Why are you reading this? Can Alkemi even do tailoring?”

“No, I think it is just for Coporalniks, but I’m not your average Little Palace trained Fabrikator. Maybe I could, I don’t know, make a potion that does tailoring?” She sounded doubtful.

“Why would you need to do any tailoring? Does Kaz need it?”

“No, it’s for me.”

“Why?” Jesper was confused, and she was making him nervous.

“I just, um,” She stuttered, “I wanted to look different.”

“Why?” He looked at her, obviously irritated. “Who told you you needed to look different?”

“Don’t be mad.”

“Too late.” He quipped. “Who said that to you?”

Y/N sat frozen, staring at the floor. Pekka Rollins. She thought. Pekka Rollins told me that. The whole crew knew the girl had been tailored for every man she met other than Pekka. It was how they knew they could fake her death and get her out of there so easily. Who was gonna see her on the street and report her to the Dime Lions if they had all known her as a different woman? What they didn’t know, however, was the reason Pekka gave her for changing her appearance.

“Um, he always said I was never gonna ‘convince’ the men who came to see me to give me any information if I looked like this.” She gulped. “And Kaz needs me to distract a guy in this job tomorrow and I just wanna be able to do what he thinks i can do.”

“Kaz is having you seduce a man for a job? Are you joking? After everything you went through—“

“Jesper, I offered. He was reluctant but it’s what needs to be done.” She told him. She could see that it made him nervous. “It won’t be the same as at the Emerald Palace, I can give the guy as much or as little as I want because I won’t have Pekka making promises to him beforehand.”

Jesper tried his best to understand what she was saying. He was not thrilled about her doing the same types of jobs she did under Rollins, but if she felt comfortable then he guessed he was fine with it. It was not his choice to make anyways. On the other hand, he was not going to let the issue of the tailoring go. She was already hurting herself trying to do it.

“Alright,” He took a breath. “But you seriously don’t need to tailor yourself to distract that man. You distract me even when you haven’t slept in days.”

“But Pekka said -“

“He said that to you because he couldn’t have people recognizing you. He was lying, like always,” he said, looking in her eyes in the mirror. “And maybe because he wanted you for himself.” He lowered down so he was speaking in her ear, “And, darling, I’m not sure I blame him. You’re a proper stunner.”

“I don’t know,” She started.

He rose, placing his chin on the top of her head. “Say it.”

“What?”

“Say you’re proper stunner.”

“I’m a proper stunner...” She murmured, laughing.

“Hm, louder.”

“I’m a proper stunner.” She said in her normal speaking volume.

“Not good enough,” he smirked, “Shout it.”

She turned in her chair and spoke in a hushed voice, “Jes, it’ll wake people up!”

He looked to the sides, “Maybe.” He rose his voice. “But I’m just going to keep getting louder!”

“Jesper, stop it.”

“No,” he grinned at her, turning her chair back to the mirror, “Not until you shout it!”

“Saints,” she sighed, then cleared her throat, “I’m a proper stunner!”

He snapped his fingers, making finger guns at mirror, “And don’t you forget it,”

She laughed, winking at the mirror to imitate him, “With that stunt I don’t think -“

Harsh knocking came from the doorway.

“Will you two be quiet?” Kaz’s voice was muffled by the door.

“Sorry, boss!” Y/N called back. His footsteps and his cane could be heard as he walked away.

As soon as the sound stopped, the two burst out laughing. Sure, they had some problems, but they were still at their best when they were together.

~~~~~~~~~

Kaz’s instructions were simple: woo the man out of his comfort zone, and kill him when the time was right. It wasn’t strategic, it was to send a message, and he was sure his Alkemi would be up to the challenge.

A member of the Razorgulls had recently been finding it within himself to advertise their club at the Fifth Harbour, claiming that the Crow Club was “a place for criminals and sinners, not poor lovely tourists.” True as the statement may have been, their club was not much better. Besides, it was bad for business. And Kaz’s reputation. So, it had to be dealt with.

Y/N was now sat across from the man and one of his friends at one of the clubs on Razorgull territory. She flirted with them like it was second nature, waiting for them to offer to take her out of the dirty booth.

“So, we went down to the harbor later that night, and destroyed the man’s the whole table.” The man and his friend laughed riotously at the story, slamming their fists on the table. “You should have seen the look on the old man’s face!”

She giggled at the story, leaning forward to touch his arm as she did. The man looked up at her with hungry eyes. She held back a grimace. I’m starting to wish I wasn’t good at this.

Across the room, Jesper watched the scene with cards in his hand, frowning. Like he had said, the idea of her flirting with other men didn’t appeal to him, and not just because it made a pit of jealous form in his stomach. He didn’t think she deserved to deal with men like this after all the men she had been forced to please in the past. Despite his reluctance to let the plan go through, he stayed at his spot where Kaz had told him to be, watching to make sure she was safe.

And she was fine. She had the men completely under her spell, no Grisha tampering required. She was infuriatingly good at laughing at their jokes, making their eyes lingering, and having them fooled that she though the world of them. Jesper wondered if she had done the same to him, but he was sure it was just his crush playing with his mind. Just because she probably doesn’t want you doesn’t mean she’s faked your entire friendship.

He had gotten so lost in his thoughts that he had almost missed her standing up with the two men, moving toward the door. Jesper looked up at an upper window of the club and fixed his collar, signaling Inej that they were on the move. Once the game was over, Kaz had told him that he could return back to the Slat and rest. He wouldn’t sleep, however, being too worried about his girl walking the streets with two violent gang members.

Outside, Inej hopped from rooftop to rooftop as she followed Y/N and her two new “friends.”

“Where are you gents taking me?” Y/N asked, batting her eyelashes.

“We’ve got an apartment just on the edge of the Barrel,” He told her, grabbing her by the waist before whispering in her ear, “just a few more blocks, sweetheart.”

The comment sent shivers down her spine. She closed her eyes tightly to drown out the flashbacks.

They continued down the street for a bit more, before one of the men began laughing. When she gave a confused hum, he began speaking.

“You see the gambling hall over there?” He pointed, earning a nod from Y/N. “I was there just the other day, playing cards. I won a shit ton from that Dregs sharpshooter.”

“No way,” the other man laughed, “you suck at cards.”

“I didn’t say I did it fair, just that I got myself some money,” he again leaned to speak into Y/N’s ear, “maybe I can buy you something real pretty to slip into.”

But she had already tensed when she heard Jesper’s name. She remembered the look on his face when he came back a few nights ago, dejected after another loss. She had held back her quip about his excess gambling, as it seemed he was upset about more than just that, and she didn’t want to press him about it. Now, hearing that someone had cheated him, that all his loss was because of some asshole’s shifty dealings, she saw red.

She moved her hands behind her back, the man with his arm wrapped around her felt his throat closing in. His vision became spotted and he moved his hands to his throat as wheezing coughs spilled out of him, causing the group to pause. He fell to his knees, unable to keep himself standing, and his friend moved next to him to ask if he was okay.

He didn’t live long enough to answer. His body lay face down in the alley they had stopped in, breath gone. His friend looked up at Y/N, quickly moving toward her when he saw the smile on her face.

“You bitch!” He shouted. “What the fuck did you do to him?”

He grabbed her by the arm and pushed her back into the wall behind her. She winced at the feeling of the brick against the back of her head, and the bruises he was no doubt leaving on her arm. She shook herself free of the disorientation, and tried to wring herself out of his arms, earning her an elbow in the face and a bloody nose. In one swift movement, stomped her foot on his, causing him to step back. She leaned her head back and slammed it into his s with a loud crack. He sat on the ground holding a hand to his head.

She leaned over him, hooking her index finger under is chin before whispering: “Kaz Brekker sends his regards.”

With a few quick motions of her hand he was unconscious. The two idiots seriously needed to look after their drinks more carefully.

Inej came down from the roof and examined the bodies. Her eyes were wide after checking the pulse of the man Y/N had first dealt with, face down on the ground. She gasped. “Saints, I think you’ve killed him.”

Y/N wiped blood from her lip and furrowed her brows. “Yeah, that was the plan.”

“No,” Inej disagreed, “Kaz told me —“

“There’s always a difference between what Kaz tells different people, you know that.” Inej continued to stare at the body with worried eyes. “Inej, I’m sorry, but I need to get this wig and makeup off and get some painkillers in my system. Can we go?”

Inej took a deep breath and nodded. Y/N linked arms with her and they continued down the street.

“And what about the other man, he’s unconscious?” Inej asked.

“Oh, yeah.” Y/N smirked, “He’ll live to tell the tale. Message sent, if I do say so myself. And all it cost me was a couple scrapes and bruises! I think they make me look hot.”

Inej laughed. “Can we get muffins on our way back?”

“I thought you’d never ask.”

#jesper fahey x reader #jesper fahey x you #jesper fahey fanfic #jesper fahey imagine #jesper x reader #shadow and bone fanfiction #shadow and bone x reader #six of crows imagine #six of crows x reader

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olderthannetfic · 3 years

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i can tell who your tog anon is by the content of your last post. so could anyone in tog fandom who’s had the misfortune to live through the top/bottom disk horse that’s been running off and on since this time last year. those of us who arent part of the debate are tired of it. we just want them all, on either side, to stop

it’s not about racism. it’s about a bunch of people seeing kinky stuff that isn’t tailored to their kinks, taking offense as loudly as they can, and then trying to control the fandom narrative by being assholes to anyone who doesn’t agree with them. lgbtmazight was one of your anon’s backers and abettors. they and theirs have made a lot of people unhappy and scared, poc and MENA people included, so i’m not surprised that now the tables are turning they’re feeling a bit worried. they started this shitshow. without them and their friends, the tog fandom would not now be the trashfire it is

i’m aroace. most fic is written by allo and amatonormative people for allo and amatonormative people, and i deal with that every time i go looking for fic on ao3. a lot of fic, explicit and not, is repulsive to me in ways that would never occur to anyone not aspec. i accept that, and i don’t expect any writer to accommodate me for things that would never occur to them and would also be completely contradictory to their own needs. if i click on something that offends me or makes me feel sick i take responsibility for my own experiences and click back out

problematic content exists. so do tags. it’s pretty easy to avoid the content you don’t want see, these days, if you pay attention. and sure, there are racist fics written for tog. there are racist fics on the top!Joe side of things. there are a number of them on the bottom!Joe side as well, and some others that are neither. on the whole, though, there isn’t a huge amount. certainly not as much as one sector of the fandom would like everyone to believe

the person you’re talking to is one of the main bottom!Joe stans. they don’t seem to comprehend that there are people who write a specific character topping because they’re their fave and they identify with them, and they are themselves tops. the discoursers make it all about supposed straight cis women wanting to write a gay couple the same way they would a straight couple. of them wanting to write the partner they identify with on bottom, because of course they are straight cis women and of course the “receiving” partner must be who they identify with. which is a very binary, very ignorant way of viewing the matter

in addition to being aroace i’m afab enby. i’m trans, i’m queer in all senses of the word, i’m kinky as hell in some very weird ways, and i’m an exclusive top. it’s safe to say that i have very different wants and needs from my fic reading and writing than pretty much the entirety of tog fandom, especially given that there are only three tog fics aside from my own that i haven’t backbuttoned out of. i also identify with Joe, so even though it’s not guaranteed that i’ll write him topping since i hc both him and Nicky as vers, there’s a good chance he will top, no matter whose pov i’m writing from. i’m not going to change my tastes; i’m old enough to understand them and be comfortable with that side of myself. i’m not going to apologize for it, either. i don’t know because i don’t interact much within the fandom, but there are probably a lot of people who feel this way. people who are fed up with /both/ the bottom!Joe and the top!Joe stans

i will say, though, that the bottom!Joe side of the fandom has been colonized by Len and her clique, and they’re where most of the toxicity originated. i’m sure your anon saw many people reblogging the call-out post from you and rushed over to your asks to try to do damage control as best they could, as they have with many other blogs in the past. from what i’ve observed, they harass via anon, they don’t act in good faith, and i sincerely hope you don’t become one of their next targets. i’ve been unpleasantly surprised to see the discourse trickling over into blogs i follow that i’d thought were exempt; i admit i’ll be sad if yours becomes the next platform to be absorbed into it

Oh, nonnie, when is my tumblr not consumed by discourse?

Don't worry, once I watch the Sarah Z video and post what I think, she'll probably start vaguing about me and then my inbox will be full of Sarah stans screaming at me again instead of TOG anons. Haha.

You could be right about exactly who this anon is. (I wouldn't know. I just read the fic in this fandom. I don't socialize over it usually.) You could be right about their motivations. That's certainly the read I got from their first messages to me. But IDK... I profoundly disagree with their analysis, but I don't think you should discount the possibility that they're some rando lurker you've never heard of and that they're operating in good faith. They don't need to be intentionally misrepresenting things for me to disagree with them.

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chao-writes-stuff · 3 years

Text

DELTARUNE SPOILERS

Heyyy! I wrote a thing involving Jevil and the Chapter 2 Superboss! I'm going to put it under the cut, but at the end, there will also be an Ao3 link if you wanna support me there!

Thank you! Remember to Reblog if you wanna

The Lightner Trio walked down the stairs in the Queen's massive manor, their hurried footsteps echoing like a rough pitter-patter in the technological nightmare. The massive lair confused and bamboozled them, but they definitely wanted to figure out the mystery behind what the Fountains were about, what Queen's true intentions were… and what was in the basement?

"Uhh… Kris?" Ralsei asked, his soft voice echoing out. "Why are we even here? Aren't Queen, Noelle, and Berdly upstairs? And not here…?"

Susie quickly interrupted him, punching his arm lightly to get his attention. "Of COURSE they aren't here. But whatever is here is probably important. Right, Kris?"

"I guess!" The currently blue human replied. "I've been asked by some… guy, about doing these weird favors for him. He really wants me to be alone."

"We sure he ain't a p-" Before Susie could finish her thought, Ralsei muffled her mouth with his scarf. "Who is he? And why does he want you to be alone?"

"His name is Spamton, I think. I don't know much about him, but he gave me this Loaded Disk earlier, and--"

Suddenly, a strange, chaotic voice rang out. Everyone recognized it. The tail attached to Ralsei's cloak popped off, diamonds and hearts flying out with it. The tail spun and took form, and the chaotic Jester they quite literally put to rest yesterday was reawakened.

"Spamton? SPAMTON? The same Spamton who wished for me to go, to go, and be free, free?" Jevil laughed chaotically, with Ralsei caught quite off guard. "You know him?"

"That dorito chip was part of the reason why I was set free, he was! He used to rule this world, before the Queen I've been hearing oh so much about took over. Oh, I MUST know more of how you met that ridiculous lunatic! And that's coming from ME, ME! Spamton, oh Spamton, I'd like to have a word with him~!" Jevil looked quite pissed off, his normally jovial expression looking slightly stern.

"I didn't wanna go down there anyway. Just come back, okay? You're kind of carrying us with your defense boost." Kris, with a neutral expression, gave the clown the disk they were gifted by the malignant salesman, and watched as Jevil immediately sprinted off into the basement. They could hear an echoed "Buh bye~! I'll be back in a few hundred words!" As the jester descended into the decrepit basement below...

Jevil entered the musty, rotting cellar. Despite him rarely stepping on the ground, each step he did take left a haunting impact on his feet. It was silent, save for the occasional rustling of his clothes. He didn't have long to do this. His physical form only had a few hours to be out and about before he solidified, just like the young boy and the puzzle freak. Thankfully, that's all he needed. He was getting excited, almost giddy, to interact once more with his old acquaintance. Oh, what a wonderful conversation they'd have!

He didn't walk for too much longer before he found the train station that was buried deep below. Or was it a roller coaster? Whoever had this built clearly had some elaborate roundabout in mind… too bad they were still imprisoned, haha! Jevil walked and floated across the tracks, reaching a room with a decaying robot inside.

He knew this was a bad idea. But when did he ever have good ideas?

Without hesitating, the joker put the disk into the robot. At first, nothing happened, and he was getting impatient VERY quick. He gave the robot a swift kick in the lower area, before stepping back out of the room.

Step…

SLAM! The clown was admittedly caught off guard with how fast the silhouette from above came and pushed him onto his knees. With a small gasp for air, Jevil looked up slowly at the encroaching menace. The jagged movements, the glitchy, unsolidified form… this was him alright.

"KRIS… MY LOYAL [Sponge!] THANK… YOU. THE [Clown Around Town!] I REMEMBER YOUR [Disgusting] FACE. EVERYONE WAS SO [Thrilled] TO SEE YOUR [Calcified] FACE." The massive robotic behemoth loomed over Jevil, rage in his glasses. Spamton NEO.

The clown got up, a smug, shitfaced expression on his mug. He knew damn well that the dorito in front of him was pissed off, so he leaned back in the air to retort. "At least I drink plenty of milk, uee hee hee! As for you, you haven't changed one bit since we last spoke~! Or would it be a byte, a byte? Regardless, I do hope you've given up on the illusion of freedom, freedom~! The only one who can be free is MEEE!"

The robotic menace swung around to the other side of Jevil, making it very clear who was in charge of the conversation. A small concentrated blast of Pipis was fired at the jester, pushing him back with a surprising amount of force. "YOU ACT SMUG, BUT YOU [Crashed our stocks!] AND THEN YOU [Spoiled relations with our Esteemed Partners!] I DON'T KNOW HOW YOU… GOT IN HERE, YOU… [Tuna Fish,] BUT I'M NOT FALLING FOR YOUR [Roundabout!] AGAIN!"

Jevil laughed maniacally at this thought. This guy was mad! Over something that happened how long ago? Why even bother holding a grudge still? Petty, petty! He knew why, and it's why he came back too. "You influenced him. That pretty little kitty. You gave him enough funds to release me into that carousel of bliss and innocence! But I wasn't done, not one bit! And all those years, spent being free… they made me realize something, my dearest Spamton."

The oddly calm tone coming from the jester put Spamton NEO at an incredible amount of unease. "WHAT? WHAT COULD YOUR [Calcified Lump] THINK OF THAT WOULD MEAN ANY GODDAMN THING TO ME?"

"I CAN DO ANYTHING!"

The joker used his latent power to pelt the giant mecha with small white hearts. Spamton was caught off-guard, stumbling back a fair amount. Of course, you have to fight fire with fire, so the robot used his abilities to send out a Big Shot of blue Spamton Head Pipis.

"YOU [Saturated Marketshare!] YOU CAN'T SIMPLY ATTACK ME AND EXPECT IT TO WORK [As seen on TV!] I'M A [BIG SHOT!] [BIG SHOT!!!]"

Jevil hopped up onto the ceiling, clearing the first few Pipis on the lower row heading his way. Unfortunately, the higher row caught him clean in the face as he bounced between the two, making a small Jack-in-the-box melody as he pinged around.

"SPAMTON, MY BELOATHED! I DON'T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND, UNDERSTAND, WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU'RE TRAPPED IN A CAGE WITH A SHARK, A SHARK! YOU GET BITTEN AND CHEWED UP!"

The fool retaliated by running circles around Spamton, turning into a carousel of horse bullets! The robot, in a surprising feat of puppeteering, dodged the attack almost perfectly… until a stray horsie cut a string, sending the mech's right arm into the horse race. One thing about arms with cannons on them? They fire.

As soon as it happened, Jevil was face to face with a swarm of Pipis all around him. He was stuck. All of them exploded brilliantly, sending the clown flying clean across the rotting tracks and into the wall. Tauntingly, mockingly even, Spamton NEO retorted.

"I'M THE SHARK NOW, JEVIL! I'VE CHEWED UP SO MANY [Failed Buisness Partners] THAT I COULD MAKE A WHOLE [Presentation] OUT OF THEM! STAY OUT OF MY GODDAMN WAY, OR [Sparkle like new!] YOU BRAT."

The buisnessman charged at Jevil, his hands becoming phones. "IT'S FOR YOU." Suddenly, before either of them could react, loud blasts of garbage noise manifest expelled from the phones, attacking the court jester with white blasts of energy. There was nothing he could do to stop this robot's onslaught, it looked like.

"OH SPAMTON, IS THAT WHAT YOU THINK? THAT YOU'RE THE ONE WHO'S SO POWERFUL RIGHT NOW, NOW? I'D SUGGEST YOU LOOK UP, UP! YOU'RE NOTHING WITHOUT THOSE STRINGS IMPRISONING YOU, UEE HEE HEE! YOU'RE NOT A BIG SHOT, YOU'RE JUST A LAZY FRAUD WHO CAN'T STOP HANGING ON TO HIM! I GUESS SLEEPING FOR 100 YEARS DOESN'T MAKE LITTLE OLD ME MISS MUCH, RIGHT?"

Without warning, Jevil was myseriously gone from his corner. The spamware looked frantically for his target, before being struck in the arm, the leg, and the chest by scythes. Devilsknives. The last knive cut a few strings clean off the puppet, who briefly hit the ground before rising back up.

"SHUT UP! SHUT UP! [Hyperlink Blocked.] I'M STILL HIS LOYAL ASSOCIATE! HE MAY NOT HAVE TALKED TO ME IN [Employee of The Month for 144 months!] BUT HE'S STILL THERE…"

Jevil interrupted him cleanly and concisely. "FACE IT. YOU'RE NO BIG SHOT ANYMORE, SPAMTON G. SPAMTON. ALL YOU ARE IS A FAILED INVESTMENT, UEE HEE HEE!"

With those words, a purple blast came from behind the clown, striking the robot right in the noggin. He flew back a bit, giving the joker enough time to turn around to meet his esteemed guests.

"Ah, my imprisoners~! Didn't you guys have a Queen to rock-em sock-em?"

Susie immediately cut him off, as she punched him in the arm (causing his head to spring up, naturally.) "Well, Kris over here couldn't shake the feeling things were off. So they forced us down here, and now they're right. Somehow?"

"I know I'm right.. Jevil, who the hell is Spamton?" Kris replied, their worry about the situation starting to rise.

"It's of no concern to you~! His screws were almost as loose as mine, and I don't think it's my job to tighten them~! Uee hee hee! Thank you for the help, but I can do anything~! Even tell you guys that 3 coasters are about to come down and force you guys along for the ride~!"

Ralsei immediately stuttered something out. "Three… what?"

And just like that, with a loud rumbling, the heroes were swept up into 3 old, rusty carts, barrelling down the track. Jevil laughed to himself, proud of what he got to do. "Ah well, it's a shame I can't finish him personally…"

"But oh well! Are you proud, proud? They took care of him…"

"Doctor."

Ao3 Link!

#Deltarune #Deltarune Spoilers #Deltarune Chapter 2 #Jevil #spamton #kris #ralsei #susie #undertale #okay cool thank you byyyyeeeee

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touchmycoat · 2 years

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mido, i would like to uhh ask for our thots on something - lemme preface this ask first by saying that this is more of a "me" problem, than it is the other party, but, here goes: if there's one thing that i've learned since consuming danmei, it's that you have two very different approaches to it re: fandom. on the one hand, you have the camp of ppl who like to go all out and wild w/ canon, do whatever, enjoy however, and on the other, ppl who try to stick closely to canon, or - 1/?

- those who don't even engage in fandom at all, and are just there to discuss the text as it is. there's nothing wrong with both approaches - we're all just here to have a good time. that being said, it kind of is giving me ??? doubt as to whether or not i'm enjoying fandom the right way. ofc there's no wrong or right way to enjoy a piece of media, and i like to think that this sin't an anne rice situation at all, but - i see ppl say fanon is shit all the time, ppl don't like certain ships.. 2/?

b/c the characters in the ships are so far removed from who they are in the text that they're pretty much just "ocs wearing the character's faces" that i have to just pause, and rlly ponder - am i doing fandom the *right* way? and it's cause for concern because i've done fandom like this ever since. i mean, my first foray into fandom was legit reading pwp/dead dove wild-ass content that was so far removed from canon, and it's been the same for every fandom i've ever been a part of 3/?

a bit of bg on me: before i came to danmei, i was knee-deep in comics. and if there's one thing you need to know abt comics - hell, even star wars - it's that anything goes re: canon because canon changes SO MUCH every few years - canon is always at the whims of the next writer who comes on board, and so it's more or less just a free-for-all pick-what-you-want buffet re: canon. doesn't mean you didn't have the occasional disk horse or meta re: canon & fanon, but. 4/?

i suppose it's just been quite.. the change of pace? anyway, fun fact: i came away from my last fandoms worrying abt and trying to be more dead dove, and now i'm worrying abt whether or not my interpretations will be canon-compliant enough. (damn @self, pick a struggle dude) anyways, one thing i've noticed is that, with mxtx, sv mains are well, i mean the book is legit sy reinventing pidw canon, and anything just goes in sv - so it's perfect. and i guess my worry is that there are - 6/?

- some mdzs-main authors whom i rlly rlly respect but am also so intimidated by because they have such amazing meta on canon events that i'm a little worried abt them seeing my works in the sv ao3 tag - even tho i know some of them don't rlly read fic - and well, getting vagued abt how my fic and interpretation of the story might be, or is, subpar. like i said, it's a me problem, because fandom is all abt writing for yourself, and the easy fix is to simply post on an altogether diff platform 7/?

but, yeah. i guess i'm just - i'm feeling kinda lost, and i get that this is borne out of my own irrational anxiety, but - what're are your thoughts on it? what do you think - is there like, not exactly *right*, but a more *aligned* way of interpreting canon that stays true to the spirit of the story, or should fandom be also all abt going crazy with your ideas? imo, u could adapt a "business in the front, party in the back" strategy on ao3 8/?

- use two complete separate profiles - one account for canon-compliant stuff and another for the id-stuff. but, yeah. i realize that the numbering of my asks may be wonky as hell, because i didn't write this ask in one go and section it off, so i'm rlly sorry if the numbering is confusing af when you view it in your inbox. anyways, that's abt it, and thank you sm for entertaining me, i rlly appreciate i. no rush, this is a super long and ?? ask, and i hope you have a nice day!

aah i hope you're having a good day too darling! it sounds like you're feeling anxious about the engagement aspect of fandom, that maybe there's a monolithic interpretation of canon and a "mainstream" way fans are supposed to enact fics/art/vids/etc. To deviate from that would garner negative notoriety, specifically from people whose interpretations are widely regarded as "good and true" and whose interpretations you also do personally like.

To directly answer your question, I do think that fandom should be all about going crazy with your ideas. I don't believe in any policing at all.

Let me try to impose a concrete example onto this real quick (do tell me if I'm misunderstanding). Back when I was on bird app, i followed two kinds of accounts: the Analysts and the Horny Folks. They're not mutually exclusive ofc lmfao but for the sake of ease: we have a set of tweets that are like, "SV identifies XYZ specific failings in stallion novel tropes, prescribes them to toxic masculinity, and reworks them in ABC ways" and another set of tweets that are like, "so Bingge kidnaps SQQ and LQG from canon timeline and fists them both one on each hand." Both kinds of tweets take hard (hard 💕) work to produce and both kinds feed me, god bless. But if you were to write fic based on these, only the first kind of tweets invites the question of whether or not you're going to incorporate that into your writing, which may or may not manifest as pressure bc it's 1) from a person you appreciate and 2) if you don't, you think maybe other fans who've seen those tweets will think you're doing something wrong or ignorant. Furthermore, if I want to write fic based on the second kind of tweets, do I then have to incorporate the gospel as spoken by the first kind of tweets??

Hell no!! You sure can but you don't have to. I feel like you know this is the answer already so let me just affirm that.

Look, I will say that I think there are fan interpretations out there that are more canon-aligned—but then I gotta ask myself the question, which fics are trying to be? When I read a Modern AU winter fluff 2k songxiao fic, I don't need it to have incisive commentary on the canon theme of blame and complicity, y'know? The fans who wrote that fic also aren't trying to give me that. Same thing with porn. I think the question at the heart of all reading endeavors is "what is the author trying to do?" The onus isn't all on the writer to be good, imo. Good readers will ask that question and meet the author where they're at, esp in fandom. It makes no sense to expect the same thing of a 4k coffee shop AU meet-cute and a 40k post-canon fix-it. It sounds like you're a generous reader and fan who is experienced with accepting, appreciating, and working with multiple interpretations of fandom (oh man, coming from comic fandoms?? you've got a soul of steel babe). So you know well that not everybody needs one definite and consistent reading of canon to happily engage in fandom. Many others are the same as you~! Even the BNFs, most likely. And if you follow people who post things that sour your self-confidence, here's the friendly reminder to unfollow them.

Another possible way to avoid concerns about being called out for misinterpretation is to write for smaller ships and audiences lmfao. Too many existing metas about the main character? Write about a minor character instead, wahoo! Too much ship content with a cemented dynamic? Write a completely new ship nobody's even heard of, ayooo. It's both good writing exercise and good for the soul 'cause people who find you want to be there and everyone else won't even see what you've done. I just think it's sexy lololol on both the reading and writing sides.

Okay also—there are interesting politics about "who has the more correct interpretation" when it comes to danmei bc not everyone has access to Chinese. I don't know if this plays a factor in your worries in any way? It's a whole other conversation lmfao so I'll keep it short but I definitely have had complex feelings about my own readings vs. non-Chinese speakers' readings vs. other "authorities" on interpreting the Chinese etc. etc.

At the end of the day, fandom is a sandbox and you should play how you want. Write your id fics, publish them on main, publish them on anon, don't publish them at all—whatever makes you happy! It sounds like visibility plays a large part in what you're anxious about? So yeah, maybe a side account or going anon is the way to go. I know people who do exactly what you said, one main for the character work and one side for the id food!! That's fucking valid fam. I have works on anon for the same reason.

As for people visibly chatting about the validity of certain characterizations or interpretations...that just can't be helped, y'know? It's the nature of the internet, and it's another way of fandom engagement. As long as it's not mean-spirited, I think you just have to make peace with it. Carry that dead dove spirit with you, maybe!! I fucking love dead dove fics. "I have done this and it is here and I'm not apologetic about it." That's just completely tits out and phenomenal. Alternatively, maybe try to manifest digital data in analog—this is what I do whenever I get anxious about my presence in fandom. The digital world distort the impact and importance of most things, y'know? Whenever I think someone is out of my league, it helps me to imagine a chat as a face-to-face discussion, and that reminds me this is a cool person yeah but they still have like, a real face and a real body with all of its real, normal things like itching and the possibility of tripping on stuff. A BNF might say something that makes me feel super insecure but i dunno, they still have to periodically scrub down the sink. They're still cool but they're also normal. Your methods of engagement are 100% valid with or without consideration to people you admire.

anyways those are my thoughts. It might also be worth mentioning too that people who apply strict standards of canon-compliance to their own readings and writings might not apply those same standards to others. I certainly don't. I mean, it's arguable how canon-compliant my interpretations are lmfao but I certainly try for it. But it's not so important for when I'm reading, y'feel? The central concern of reading, at least for me, is more "has this author sold me on their story" and less about whether or not it complies with "my" readings. if I'm only interested in my readings, I wouldn't be reading other people's works. And if I am in fact not interested in other people's interpretations, then maybe you shouldn't be so interested in my interpretations either hahahha.

#long post #anon #is this useful? i hope this is useful #live and let live #i just hate when people get mean about shit #but i also recognize some people are just engaging without being mean-spirited #so i just gotta peace out kjsdnfkjsdnf #it's part of why i deletd twitte #anyways if you like hugs here's a hug #DO WHAT YOU WANT #FUCK ALL THE NOISE TELLING YOU OTHERWISE

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marshmurmurs · 3 years

Note

The role swap au is so cool!! 2 questions if you don’t mind? How would more recent events play out, would they be totally different than how Tommy escaped? What would Techno think? And also: would you mind if someone wrote a fic on this?

I’m glad you you like it! And I’d definitely be cool with someone writing a fic. Anybody who makes any kind of content for any of my aus is immediately added to the list of people I would kill for.

One of the major differences in this au comes from @pegasister60. She’s been hitting me hard with the Purpled propaganda and I am here for it so now that is everyone else’s problem.

At some point Dream decided to let Tubbo have a visitor. Up until then he had been playing heavily into the isolation to get Tubbo to doubt his friendship with the people of L’manberg. He told Tubbo that they all knew where he was in case they wanted to visit but the only people who knew were Dream and Ghostbur. And Dream made sure to make it clear to Ghostbur that he wasn’t supposed to tell anyone where they were, it was their little secret. Dream brought Purpled to where Tubbo had built his new home. Since Purpled tended to stay neutral and even had conflicts with some of L’manberg’s government, Dream was sure he wouldn’t interfere with any of his plans. He made sure to warn him not to bring up L’manberg though, claiming it would upset Tubbo.

Dream didn’t notice when Tubbo slipped a book into Purpled’s hands. Neither did he notice Purpled hiding it away. As far as Dream was aware, the iron ingots Tubbo gave Purpled were payment for helping automate one of his farms. When Tubbo asked if Purpled would visit again, Purpled promised he would. Dream didn’t realize he just let Tubbo establish a means of contact with L’manberg.

Dream started to catch on to something happening when he noticed Tommy becoming more bold again. Then he started to notice it was rather suspicious that Tubbo kept trying to get leather and ink. They shifted to leaving no physical evidence of the communications, having Purpled remember and repeat the messages sent between Tubbo and L’manberg.

Dream doubled down on the isolation thing. He told Purpled to stop visiting, claiming things were too dangerous in L’manberg and he didn’t want anyone following him and dragging Tubbo into things. Purpled knew he was lying, but couldn’t say anything without revealing that he had been delivering messages between Tubbo and L’manberg, so he agreed to stop visiting on one condition: Dream had to let Purpled leave Tubbo a gift. He agreed. The gift was a bee named Yellowed. He liked the flowers native to L’manberg and could remember the way there and get back. Yellowed continued the delivery service when Purpled no longer could.

Dream intercepted one of Yellowed’s deliveries and realized what Tubbo and Purpled had been doing behind his back the entire time. Underestimating Tubbo had been a mistake. So he went for where it hurt. Neither side saw Yellowed again. L’manberg believed Tubbo just hadn’t had anything to say. Dream had noticed the tracker Yellowed had and hid it with Tubbo. Even Purpled was led to believe that Tubbo had Yellowed with him. Tubbo worried as more and more time passed and Yellowed never returned. He even asked Dream, who said he hadn’t seen the bee around there but offered to help look for how he could’ve gotten out. The explanation that made the most sense was that Yellowed was still at L’manberg and his friends hadn’t yet sent him back with a message. But why wouldn’t they? They promised they’d always send the bee back within a day. It hadn’t even been raining, Yellowed should have been back. Unless they stopped caring. Unless they’ve abandoned him. But surely they wouldn’t. But time continued to pass and the only news he heard of L’manberg was from Dream himself and he couldn’t help but think that might have been what happened.

Dream’s manipulations started hitting him harder after he’d had that bit of connection torn away from him. And with Dream no longer holding back — Did you have fun with Phil when he came over? Oh, he didn’t? Weird, I could’ve sworn he would. I saw him giving Tommy some sort of special emerald, I thought it was a family thing since Ghostbur and Techno also have one. Maybe not if he hasn’t come here. Phil would come out all this way for family. I’m sure he remembers how to get here, or he could just ask Ghostbur or Tommy, he probably still has that compass thing.— it eventually became too much. Tubbo went to the enderchest Dream had given him on the first day of the exile. If Tommy didn’t care about him, about the disk he had, then surely he wouldn’t care if he just... Dream grinned when Tubbo pulled out the disk, thinking he won. But then Tubbo put down a bucket of lava and dropped the disk into it.

Dream was *fuming* he put all his time and effort into this plan all for Tubbo to just ruin everything. He started placing down tnt and Tubbo couldn’t do anything to stop him. He froze up, he looked at the tnt and he was back in the box on stage, Techno’s rocket launcher pointed at his face, he was back in L’manberg as Wilbur pressed the button and everything they’d been fighting for was destroyed around him.

Yellowed’s tracker and the lodestone were both destroyed in the explosion. Both Purpled and Tommy realized something was wrong and immediately left to check. Tommy traveled as fast as he could, but it was nowhere near as fast as a horse on a speed pot could go. He also hadn’t traveled the path enough to have memorized the quickest way to go. Purpled got there and found a crater in place of everything Tubbo had built. He found Tubbo in the crater, injured and dangerously close to some lava, but alive. Purpled threw down an enderchest and quickly began helping Tubbo. Once Tubbo was healed enough for it to be safe for him to be transported by horse, Purpled got him out of there. He didn’t want to be around if Dream decided to come back.

When Tommy got there he looked at the ruins and could only assume Dream had killed Tubbo. He wanted revenge. He’d held off on going after Dream before because Phil had let him know their plan was incredibly stupid — Techno’s in retirement, leave him out of it. Besides, you know how he is about government, if you somehow manage to drag him into this and side with you, you know he’s just going to turn around and get rid of you next. — when Tommy had told him about it in hopes of Phil to help him convince Techno to join them. But Tommy didn’t care anymore. The peace Tubbo wanted for their nation was no longer an option, maybe it never was. Dream had gone too far and Tommy wasn’t going to let him get away with it, even if it cost him his last life.

Purpled took Tubbo to a nearby village. He needed to bring his friend somewhere safe and L’manberg simply wasn’t. A village in the middle of nowhere that nobody knew about was. Or so he thought. Someone did know about the village and that someone happened to visit for some trades while they were there. Needless to say Techno was very confused when he entered a house looking to trade with some villagers and instead found two children hiding inside.

Techno hadn’t really been paying attention to L’manberg after he decided to retire. All he really knew about the situation was that Vice President had been exiled. So when he saw that Vice President hiding out in the village in the middle of nowhere, he was a bit smug. Reasonably so, he’d say. “How’s that government thing working out for you?” He asked. But then Tubbo flinched away and Purpled was shooting him a glare that promised he would stop at nothing to slay him if he made any wrong move. Techno decided he wouldn’t test that out, he was retired anyway. But something was clearly wrong. Normally at a clear challenge like this his voices would demand blood for the blood god. Instead they were screaming at him in panic and worry, the one thing consistent amongst the voices being their desire to keep Tubbo safe. Techno left the two in the building, hoping getting away from them would get the voices to calm. He knew though, when they got like that they wouldn’t stop until they got what they wanted. He needed to get Phil, he would know what to do.

Sorry for the late response I am not good at words <3

#mcyt #tubbo #purpled #dreamwastaken #dreamsmp #ask #uh oh exile remix #says marsh #au hours #long post

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honesthammie · 3 years

Text

4th prompt part 2

The silence was appreciated as your mind wrapped up today's event. You had met your soulmate in a goddess of a woman. Everything you had discovered so far was perfect. You watched as she pulled a metal disk and metal stick from her pockets. The metal stick made a strange buzzing sound and glowed a faint orange at the tip as she hovered over the disk.

"What are you doing?" You asked after watching her in curiosity for a few moments. You would've let her continue as her face was quite the sight. Her eyes were sparkling with intent and her nose had the most adorable scrunch.

She stopped for a moment as you spoke as if thinking on what to say before continuing. "I'm scanning for any spider eggs in the building so we can take them with the other spiders to a planet of their own. A planet without civilisation but full to the brim with creatures they can eat. I think, the fam got them all. No, fam still doesn't seem right. The team does sound better!"

"A planet? What, are you some kind of alien?"

"Yes. Would that be a problem?" She asked. From the way her eyes sparkled, I believed her. Great, no wonder why she seemed so ethereal! So when I say, she's out of this world, it'd be a fact and not a flirtatious comment! For fuck sake, that's one of my best lines as well! Maybe I could use it when the time is right?

"Nope. After the discoveries of my life recently, that's actually the most believable thing. Please don't ask yet. However, those spider babies trust me. You aren't going to get them to listen without me. I spent at least a full 5 hours with them, they trust me more than you. Come on little Miss Sunshine, hop to it, the spiders won't wait forever." I spoke with confidence. I knew she knew, she needed me. That's why she followed me. "I'm (y/n) by the way"

"Great name! Love that name, was always one of my favourites. I've always fancied myself as a (y/n) but the faces never seem to fit it. I'm normally a John but I can't be now I'm a woman. Why don't you give me an alias for when I'm undercover?"

"Hmmm. I quite liked the name Alice and you certainly suit that name. Is there a name people call you when you aren't undercover. What do family call you?"

"Alice. I love that! I'm keeping Smith. Alice Smith. Perfect! Knew you'd be the one to help me. People tend to call me the Doctor. So do I for some reason. Wish I knew why."

This cute blonde alien was more mysterious the more we talked. She told me of how her ship goes in time as well as in space. She told me of the time of when she met Robin Hood with an older face and a companion named Clara. All this talk and I wasn't bothered once by it. I could listen and watch her all day as she talks about adventures she's been on. She puts all the theatrics on and waves her arms about with so much passion and her eyes show her emotions so clearly. But I also saw age. If she's older than she looks, just how old is she? Not that it bothers me, it's just, if she's like hundreds of years old, she's probably had other lovers and I don't know if plain old me can compete with that.

Sooner than we realised, we came towards a blue Police box. She clicked her fingers and waltzed right in. This must be her TARDIS. I walked inside with awe. The ship was beautiful inside. Like a gem hidden as an ore. The golden and blue lights perfectly reflected her personality.

"It's fucking massive Sunshine! Ya didn't warn me about walking into a football field! No wonder why thousands of spiders seemed no problem! Fucking hell!" I stated as my eyes scanned the room in front of me. Then I felt a little tug on my right trouser leg. I looked down and saw a little spider wanting my attention. I bent down and picked him up. He seemed happy to be held like that so I kept him in that position as I wondered towards the Doctor.

I had so many questions I wanted to know and I'm sure she has too. But now was not the time for that. We needed to get these spiders to their new home. I continued to watch the Doctor as she danced around something she called a console. She was pressing buttons and pulling levers and many more things until the ship made a strange wheezing noise and I was thrown off my feet. Thankfully I was caught by someone. I looked up and saw an oldish man.

"Hello Love! I can tell this your first time here. We all fell down when she first did that with us. You learn to find something to grab onto. I'm Graham by the way." Graham spoke gently but loudly over the noise of the ship. I couldn't help but giggle, my grandad used to call me Love too.

Then as quick as the ship started, it came to a gentle stop. I looked around and notice the same 2 people from earlier. The girl was smiling and laughing to something the boy mentioned. They must be old friends. I then noticed the Doctor walk towards the doors and open them just enough for her to check outside.

"Right (n/n). I'm calling you that as we are friends now. Go on, it's your first new planet and you care about these spiders more than we do so I think it's best if you check everything it perfect for them!" The Doctor spoke with excitement. She even clapped her hands for a moment, obviously not being able to control the surge of energy running through her.

I held the spider in my arms and the doors opened in front of me. I closed my eyes for a moment as the light blinded me temporarily. I could feel the warmth of a sun and the cool breeze the gently whipped past your face giving you the perfect cooling needed. The planet smelled sweet yet sour like Toxic waste sweets. I could hear many creatures making strange noises, some were doing a high pitched growl and some others were doing deep scream. Then there were nicer sounds like birds tweeting but in a lower key and something sounded like a piano, specifically an old ragtime piano.

I slowly opened my eyes and noticed the silver sky and its 4 suns in each direction. I noticed that the high pitched growl was from a small flying frog like creature and the deep scream was from a big rabbit- horse like creature that was just chewing the purple leaves off the metal looking trees. The bird like sound belonged to a small Robin like creature, but instead of a red chest it was a beautiful blue hue and it had silver eyes that sparkled just right. The Ragtime piano sound belonged to a dog-raccoon like creature that scampered away with its mouth full of the fallen berries that the rabbit-horse dropped from the leaves. The grass beneath was as black as ink and the pond to the right of me was a strange red colour.

"Well what do ya think? I personally think it's perfect but you seem to know these arachnids better than me so, I could be wrong, although, I'm not often" The Doctor spoke with eagerness. I noticed her looking at me as I took in the world around me. Why does this feel all too familiar to me? Why do I like the escapism of Earth? Why is this so, freeing?

I took a deep breath in. "Its perfect Doc. The spiders will love it here! They'll adapt pretty quickly I believe. The creatures are big enough to satisfy them. Although the sounds are a little off putting." I put the spider in my arms in the oddly cotton soft grass and watched as the thousands of others followed in its footsteps. Some carried the baby spiders and others carried the eggs. They had already found a cave to lay the eggs and started weaving some webs within 10 minutes.

Once I was happy with everything, I said my goodbyes and entered the strange ship once more. I could feel fresh tears sting my eyes like tiny hot needles. I get so attached so quickly and I noticed the string warm up and I checked on my soulmate, she was looking at me with an all too familiar look, the look of complete adoration. So the string tells me when her love for me evolves until we kiss? I mean, that's when it disappears for everyone else.

"This was great Sunshine! I had a ride of a lifetime, I really did. So I guess, you can drop me off home, I'm probably not wanted and I don't wanna ruin your team dynamic here."

"Why on Earth would you think that? I was actually wondering if you'd like to join us. Those spiders trusted you and having someone like you would really make the adventures more thrilling. Besides, I really like you and there's something special about you and I can't place my finger on it. I don't like not knowing things. If I drop these off home for a bit, would you mind if I ran some tests on you?"

"Really? Sure. I don't mind. I actually wanna know aswell. You see, I know what's special but I don't want to tell you in front of the others, its a bit embarrassing." I asked whilst blushing. She nodded her head and set the TARDIS coordinates to Sheffield. The Doctor promised she'd be back in a week and set the TARDIS to float in our solar system whilst she got to work on me.

We walked into what I can assume is some sort of med Bay. The walk had conversations about the last planet and how we thought the spiders would adjust. Eventually she sat me down on a white bed.

"So, you said you knew why you were special. I don't like cliffhangers so I'll give you a custard cream if you tell me." She said as she got a paper document and waited for me to speak.

"I don't know how or why but have you ever heard of the red string of fate story?" I asked, wondering how to word this without sounding weird. She nodded her head in understanding. "Well, when I turned 16, I could see everyone's red strings. The world was covered in red. I was confused at first until I read that story."

"Hmm. That is interesting because all stories have some truth to them. Some are exaggerated and some are exactly as said. Well that story is a good example of that. Thousands of years ago, there were 2 species of human, homo sapiens and homo spectrians. Spectrians were low on numbers in population as they'd spend almost all their life playing match maker. You'd know Spectrians as Cupids. However when battles and wars happened, Cupids were out of a job as everyone had to focus on the country and not themselves. This is where arranged marriages started happening and Cupids were becoming depressed. Eventually the Cupids decided to blend in with the humans and became virtually extinct. You might be the only Cupid left in the universe, other than Valentine himself." She explained it so well.

"Can Cupids see their own string?" I asked. She paused for a moment. Her eyes flickered between heartbroken and hopeful. I felt the string flicker between cold and toasty warm just like her eyes.

"No. Cupids weren't supposed to have soulmates. But I guess you are technically half human so maybe that makes sense. Do you know who your soulmate is?"

"She's amazing. She's like a Goddess. When I first saw her I immediately thought, She's too fucking perfect for someone like me. She incredibly smart too but, can be oblivious. I mean, I only met her a few hours ago and I'm fucking smitten with her. She reminds me of sunshines and rainbows. I'm just waiting for her to make a move." I told her. She looked at me for a moment, processing this new information. She smirked for a moment once she figured it out.

"Well my soulmate had me wrapped around her finger the second she jumped in front of a spider to save her life. A bold move like that normally makes me mad but, she did it so well. I haven't known her long but I can see me being by her side forever, travelling the stars. She reminds me of those stars actually. The way she sparkles in the light. I love you (y/n) with both of my hearts." She spoke softly as we slowly leaned in. When she finished, she planted her soft lips on mine and the red string was gone. Not that I noticed until an hour later when we picked the team up and held hands to announce our relationship.

Maybe dating a sunshine is exactly who I needed.

#13th doctor #thirteenth doctor x reader #female reader #13th doctor x reader #soulmate

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aka-irish · 3 years

Text

Apex Legend: The Top Predator 3.5 The Queen's Heart (Intermission)

*Author’s Note. This is a more heavily cardiophilia filled installment. It has minimal impact on the main story, but still ties into it.*

*Thud. Thud. Thud* A knock on Lifeline’s door is heard as the doctor responds “Com on in”. Loba walks in rubbing her eyes “Why did you have me get up so early for this?” she questions groggily, the thief still half asleep. Ajay crosses her arms over chest “I ain’t doin dis for mah own healt. But you were the one that got stuck first in dis mess, I need ta see how ya boom-boom’s boomin”. She smirks at the thief. “Tck. Fine” groans the aristocrat. “What do you need me to do?” she questions the medical expert. “Take ya shirt off, and sit on da bed, we doin a full examination today. I think it’s time for you get back out there” Loba sighs as she’s done just having people examining and questioning about her heart since the incident, considering the sympathy towards her as a question of pity and her resilience. She does as ordered and sits on the bed, her thick frame compressing the mattress. She grabs the bottom of her shirt and pulls it over her head. Her large, tanned breasts falling with a slight smack as heavy flesh hits. Her brown hair to fiery orange-red hair cascading behind, not being done up in her trademark braids. “Ya ready?” asks Lifeline. “Just get this over with” says Loba with a bit of vitriol in her voice.

“Doc, set up EKG operations” Ajay tells her medic-drone. DOC beeps as he flies around near Loba and deploys a small wire with a pad on it. The pad sticks Loba’s chest and a small screen pops up on the top of the medic drone. *Beep..beep..beep...beep..beep* the monitor begins to display rhythmic peaks, it’s Loba’s heart. “What can’t this thing do?” Loba asks in half combination of sarcasm and wonderment. “It can’t fix up dat attitude of yours” Ajay snarks back. “the golden-brown, wolf like eyes giving Lifeline a cold stare before softening”, Loba knowing full well she needs this. *Beep...beep...beep...beep* the monitor continues to tick and beep as Loba’s strong heart sits at a stead 63 beats per minute, showing the normal condition of one of the most athletic Legends. “Hold still, dis is gonna be cold” Lifeline grabs her stethoscope and puts the bell on the aortic point on the slight right side of Loba’s chest. *Beep..beep..beep.beep* “Tssss. Cold!” Loba twitches slightly and her heart responds in kind as the warm, soft flesh stings at the touch of the cold metal of the stethoscope. “I told cha this would be cold” Lifeline blatantly states. The chatter subsides as Ajay begins to focus on the sounds emanating from the strong bosom of the Andrade successor. *Thoom-thoomp...thoom-thoomp...thoom-thoomp*, Loba’s heart beats steadily. Ajay lifts the steth and moves it over to Loba’s pulmonic, the cold steth becoming slightly warmer. -Thoom-thoomp...thoom-thoomp...thoom-thoomp. The beats of her heart becoming slightly louder as Ajay covers slightly more of the organ. She traces the steth down and ends up at Loba’s pulmonic, the steth sinking into the side of Loba’s breast. *Thoom-thoomp...Thoom-thoomp...Thoom-thoomp...thoom-thoomp* the heart sounding much louder here as the strong organ contracts inside her bosom. Ajay looks down and notices the steth and side of Loba’s boob twitching with each powerful pump. Ajay reaches her free hand down and lifts the at least DD sized breast up, and moves the steth under it before letting go, now positioning it at her mitral valve..or apex of her heart if you will. *Thoom-thoomp...Thoom-thoomp...thoom-thoomp...thoom-thoomp!* The powerful ejections at their pinnacle hit the steth hard, drowning Ajay’s ears in the sound of her beats. Even Ajay smirks slightly at the powerful jolts of Loba’s heart, further shaking her hand and whole of Loba’s boob.

After her length examination she pulls the steth back. “How’s it sound, doctor?” Loba asks once again in half sarcasm, but half honest curiosity. “Ya ticker’s beating strong and steady. But now I gotta palpate. Lie down on ya side” she orders her patient. Loba lays down on her left side as she feels the rubber gloved hand wrap around the lower part of her chest under her breast. *Thoom-thoomp...Ajay feels the powerful heart with her full hand this time, slow and deep against the softness of Loba’s chest. The powerful heartbeat shaking her hand and breast still slightly, but Ajay can really feel the powerful tip of her heart hitting her fingers that managed to position between Loba’s ribs. “Feels good” she removes her hand and Loba turns to lay down on her back, the breasts shifting down to her sides. “Are we done?” she asks...”It’s getting a bit...chilly here.” she remarks. “Hold ya horses..got one last ting to do” Lifeline says. She grabs a tube and squirts a bit of the gel onto Loba’s chest. “OO..the steth was nothing this stuff is worse” blurts out the aristocrat. “I told ya...we got one last bit, then ya can go on wit’cha day” Ajay replies back. “DOC, deploy wand and switch to ultrasound mode. The EKG pad retracts off of Loba’s chest as a harder looking cable with a small metal disk ejects out. It attaches itself to Loba’s chest, and a second cable with wand like attachment drops out. Lifeline grabs the wand and places it on Loba’s chest over the gel. The EKG monitor changes its display to a blue visage of Loba’s heart. “Display sound but keep to a minimum” she orders her health drone. A slight booming can be heard coming from DOC that matches the rhythm of the contracting organ on the screen. Lifeline and Loba look intently at the drone’s screen. *Thoom-thoomp...thoom-thoomp...thoom-thoomp....thoom-thoomp*. Loba’s strong heart contracts and beats inside her chest, the wand bobbing up and down with each rhythmic pump. They both watch and stare and listen as Loba’s life giving heart continues to thud. Lifeline removes the wand and the display is gone. “Alright, DOC. Break down time” she tells the robot. The disk attachment, the wand, and the screen recede back into the drone as it beeps and boops. Ajay hands Loba a wipe for her chest. “Here”. “Thanks, beautiful” says the Queen Wolf as she wipes the goo off her chest. She reaches for her shirt and puts it back on, flipping her hair back with her hands as it once again cascades behind like a fiery waterfall. “How ya feelin?” she asks Loba. “Normal...” Loba says cautiously, giving a slightly squinted look at Ajay, almost in a weird state of confusion and revelation. “Good...ya 100% now, girl” Loba’s revelation becomes the realization as she smiles a vicious smile herself. “The queen is back...and now it’s time to step on some necks.”

#cardiophile #cardiophilia #heartbeat #female heartbeat #visible heartbeat #cpr #defib #resus

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scalproie · 3 years

Note

Oooh something Kung Fu Panda I wanna start disk horse: Shifu

China's least zen zen master

favorite thing about them : I LOVE that he contribuated in the creation of the villain of the first movie, that you can't blame eveything on him but that you can't deny that it's his fault as well, I love that it makes you think of the nature vs. nurture notion of evil, I love that he's a complex character with flaws that is one of the main drive of the first story and I LOVE his transition from who he was in kfp1 to the spiritual leader we see in kfp2 and 3 who is still learning and struggling but manage to take over Oogway's place and role.

least favorite thing about them : As mentionned with previous characters, I personally am fine with his shortcomings because it made sense in the events of the story, that being said, Tigress had no involments in his tragic story with Tai Lung and the fact that she still carries scars of his harsh treatment of her in the first movie and that it's NOT addressed at all is making me go >:(

favorite line : look man his apology to Tai Lung hits everytime and so does the entire scene that leads to it, AND what follows. The fact that it's such a serious, vulnerable moment played completely straight AND THAT IT WORKS FOR A SECOND is so so so good... and it makes the joke with Po appearing funnier (as well as defusing the situation) with contrast.

brOTP : Oogway because every conversation they have is gold and food for thought. Like that philosophical conversation with the peach tree and the seed (WHICH COMES INTO FRUITION IN THE END CREDITS). And overall, you really feel the old frienship and history they have with each other.

OTP : na

nOTP : na as well

random headcanon : Idk maybe its not even an hc, but I like to think Oogway specifically send him to Tigress' orphanage because he had personal experience with dealing with a rough feline child before. ALSO this one is the director's but I like it: when he was young, he wanted to become the dragon warrior himself, but lacked self-confidence much like Po, so he decided that he will TRAIN the dragon warrior instead and well...

unpopular opinion : I know the tv show introduced the "his father abandonned him at the jade palace" and it's good but I lowkey like the boring idea that he just left his family to study kung fu under Oogway a tiiiny bit more.

song i associate with them : That one (1) heroic rendition of "Oogway Ascend" during the final battle of kfp2

favorite picture of them : well it's less a picture and more of a sequence but the scene where he get the dragon scroll for Po with Oogway's staff. And the very last time you see him in kfp3

#ask meme #anon #thats enough disk horse for ya?#kfp #tagging later

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wolfprincesszola · 3 years

Text

Discord

Sometimes I wonder why I try to write when I, in fact, have writer’s block. I will never understand, but I’m doing it anyways. Living Tombstone is such a good artist and I recently came back to this song, so have this horribly put together song fic. Enjoy! ————– Summary: Tubbo feels something is wrong and as his presidency continues, he realizes that L’manberg is collapsing on itself.

Trigger Warnings: None

Content Warnings: Swearing, Spoilers

Reference: Discord (Remix) - The Living Tombstone (ft. Eurobeat Brony)

Read it at ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28133694 ————– I'm not a fan of puppeteers But I've a nagging fear Someone else is pulling at the strings

Tubbo never liked manipulation. That was why he chose peace over everything. However, he knew that being a peacemaker was only going to hurt him in the end, which is why he was always looking out for anyone trying to control him.

He was lying awake in his bed when he decided it would do some good to get up. He got out, checking the time. Midnight. Everyone would be sleeping.

Thoughts were spinning through his mind and he just couldn’t get them out. Presidency came with that, he guessed.

He took a walk around L’manberg and the Dream SMP land before stopping by the infamous bench. The one where Tubbo and Tommy usually sat, listening to music.

He sat down, trying to wrap his thoughts. Why was there a part of him that was worried that someone would manipulate him and cause the fall of L’manberg? Presidency held a lot of power and manipulation wasn’t easy to detect. Tubbo could easily-

“Tubbo, what are you doing here?”

Tubbo jumped and looked back to see Technoblade.

“Technoblade?” His fear increased as he backed away from him, “What are you doing here?”

Something terrible is going down Through the entire town Wreaking anarchy and all that it brings

“I couldn’t sleep.” Technoblade admitted. “I have a feeling that something terrible is going to happen.”

He sat on the bench, offering the seat to Tubbo.

“You aren’t....you aren’t going to kill me, are you?” Tubbo asked, pulling out his sword.

Technoblade just snorted, “Tubbo, it’s the middle of the night. I have standards. If I was to kill you, it’d have to be flashy and in front of everyone. Otherwise, how would I get clout? And fear?”

Tubbo just relaxed, deciding to sit next to Techno. “What’s this terrible thing that you think is going to happen?”

“I’m not sure.” Techno sighed, “Look, I’m an anarchist and all. I dislike the fact that you guys literally built a government in front of me, literally betraying MY ideals and-”

“I get it, Techno.” Tubbo rolled his eyes, “Get to the point.”

“I have to give you facts for trying to restore L’manberg, despite all that. I’ve decided to try and give up my violent ways..but I know Dream isn’t. Dream’s angry at you guys.”

I can't sit idly No I can't move at all I curse the name The one behind it all

Tubbo felt his stomach churn. That is not at all what he wanted to hear.

“He’s power-hungry, Tubbo. And he’s not going to stop at any costs.”

“We have to do something about it! Techno, you said that-”

“I’m sorry, Tubbo, I can’t help you there. This is your own battle. I have my own to deal with. Just....watch out for my brother. I know he can be a bit....irrational sometimes and I wouldn’t want Tommy to ruin your progress with L’manberg.”

“Thank you, Blade.”

Technoblade just nodded.

Discord, I'm howling at the moon And sleeping in the middle Of a summer afternoon Discord, whatever did we do To make you take our world away?

Tubbo’s blood ran cold as soon as he heard of the obsidian walls surrounding L’manberg. When he realized it was because of Tommy, he knew that it had already happened.

Dream was the most powerful man on the server and Tommy had just given him power over L’manberg. Because of Tommy, Dream could cause the fall of L’manberg and it would be all Tubbo’s fault. Because he couldn’t have chosen a better vice president.

As Tubbo and Dream talked about what to do with Tommy, Tubbo realized something. Tommy was the only thing Dream didn’t have power over. And Tommy had just given Dream an ability to have power over him.

The only thing he could do was try and keep his best friend from hurting the nation even more.

Discord, are we your prey alone? Or are we just a stepping stone For taking back the throne? Discord, we won't take it any more So take your tyranny away

Tubbo felt his blood run cold as Tommy kept saying that he had power over Dream.

Tommy had reassured Tubbo plenty of times, but Tubbo couldn’t help but try to warn Tommy anyways.

He knew that Dream was pissed as Tommy ordered Dream to tear down the walls and he knew that Tommy had messed up when Dream had started to build the walls even higher.

“Tommy, okay, listen, you’ve fucked up this time.” Dream glared at his best friend.

Tubbo stayed quiet, but he gave Tommy a look. He told him not to push Dream and yet he did. Now, the whole nation would pay for it.

“No, no, no, no, no, no, no, I don’t give a fuck about Spirit, okay? I don’t give a fuck about anything actually. I care about your disks. I care more about your disks than you do. That’s the only thing I care about in the server, actually. I don’t care about Spirit. Spirit was my horse. Died ages ago. I care about your disks because that’s what gives me power over you, and your friends, and everybody that you care about because you care about your disks more than anyone else here. So if you are not exiled from L’manberg, I will build these walls until they reach the sky. Don’t try and threaten me. I don’t care. I have lost-”

Tommy cut Dream off, trying to test what Dream had said and it had only made Dream even angrier. Tubbo couldn’t stop what was happening. All he could do was watch.

Dream gave Tubbo a deadline of three days to exile Tommy.

I'm fine with changing status quo But not in letting go Now the world is being torn apart A terrible catastrophe Played by a symphony What a terrifying work of art

When Dream left, everyone started to yell at each other. They were ripping each other at the throats.

Tommy saw Tubbo was being quiet and Tommy sighed, “Tubbo, he’s only doing this to get under your skin so you turn on me, alright?”

Tubbo finally decided to speak up because he was tired of trying to keep things nice and neat between him and his best friend. “No, actually, I think you made it very clearly what he’s doing. He’s doing this to get your disks because he wants them.”

“But the reason he’s doing this is because he knows that he-”

“You had one job. You couldn’t do one thing for me. You couldn’t do one. Just one thing and it was for your own good.”

Tubbo was hurt. He thought Tommy, for once, could help him with something. But no. It was always about his disks. Never about the good for L’manberg or for Tubbo. Tommy would see the world burn if it meant that he could have his disks back.

Tubbo sighed, “So you know what? If the roles were reversed, as you said, yeah, yeah you probably wouldn’t exile me. Because I would’ve actually listened to you and done what you said! Maybe have a couple ounces of respect! You’ve messed this up for no one but yourself.”

Tommy just looked away from Tubbo, not facing him.

Then, Tubbo didn’t know what hit him, but he let the anger take over him. “Selfish.”

Tommy stayed silent, but his head whipped towards him.

L’manberg would be torn apart because of their friendship. Even though Dream may have started it, Tubbo had to be the one to seal the deal if he wanted the nation to stay together.

L’manberg was crumbling on itself. A terrifying future without the best friends by each other’s sides.

I can't sit idly No, I can't move at all I curse the name The one behind it all

“I have come to the decision that it would be best for the nation...the most logical thing to do is for Tommy to be exiled.” Tubbo had told everyone.

He saw the shift in everyone’s face as they were in bewilderment. But Tubbo couldn’t let Dream control L’manberg. It was best for the nation if Tommy couldn’t hurt Dream from here.

Dream may have been controlling them, but Tubbo knew that the only way for the nation to survive, Tommy had to go. And there was nothing that anyone could do. Because Dream was the most powerful person on the server.

Discord, I'm howling at the moon And sleeping in the middle Of a summer afternoon Discord, whatever did we do To make you take our world away?

Tubbo missed Tommy. It had been so long since he saw his best friend. But he couldn’t go against Dream. Not at the moment. Not while L’manberg was still just recovering from the last war.

What had Tubbo done though? To deserve the backlash he did for exiling his best friend?

Was he a bad person for wanting to do what was right for the nation? Should he have cared about Tommy more?

Discord, are we your prey alone Or are we just a stepping stone For taking back the throne? Discord, we won't take it any more So take your tyranny away

Tubbo knew he couldn’t visit Tommy. Not when Dream was currently helping L’manberg when they needed it most.

So he stayed away for his nation.

Then, Ghostbur had come to him with a surprise.

“I know you’ve been sad. And you’re having a rough time with yourself right now and you have the idea that you’ve done something wrong. I just want you to know that it’s okay. Tommy will enjoy his vacation, it’s just new to him.”

“It’s just an adjustment.” Tubbo agreed.

“It’s new to him, this whole vacation and it’s one of those things where, you know what they say about a vacation, is where the best part is when you’re coming home and getting back to your old house. So the longer that he’s out, the more adjusted he gets to his new vacation home and the better it’ll be when he comes home.”

“You’re looking out for him.” Tubbo had stated.

Ghostbur had nodded. “I know you and him...you know, you’ve got each other, always. So I wanted to make sure that even when you’re distant, you two still know where each other are, so I got you this.”

He had given Tubbo a compass. One that Tubbo appreciated and soon would hold it close to him all the time. That way, Tubbo always knew where Tommy was.

Tubbo missed Tommy, and he knew that Dream was manipulating him. He just...couldn’t do anything about it. He was powerless if he wanted L’manberg to continue to survive.

Discord, I'm howling at the moon And sleeping in the middle Of a summer afternoon Discord, whatever did we do To make you take our world away?

It was apparent that the country was tearing itself from the inside the moment that the Butcher Army had went to hunt down Technoblade.

When Tubbo had arrived with the other three members, he noticed Technoblade had been ready for him. When Technoblade had surrendered, Tubbo knew that Quackity had gone too far, but it was too late.

When Quackity had whispered in his ear to just execute Technoblade, Tubbo couldn’t help but feel compelled. After all, Quackity was part of his cabinet. Why would he betray Tubbo?

So Tubbo did what Quackity said. If Tubbo had seen through Quackity’s manipulation, he gave no notice to it.

L’manberg was destined to fall.

Discord, are we your prey alone Or are we just a stepping stone For taking back the throne Discord, we won't take it any more So take your tyranny away

Tubbo wanted to see Tommy. That was all he wanted to do after what had happened. When he got there, all he saw was the wreckage of what once was Logstedshire....and a tall pillar.

“Surely not.” He muttered to himself as he looked around.

After looking around some more, he realized there was no other conclusion.

He sat in the wreckage, quiet.

It was clear now. Dream was power-hungry. He got rid of the only thing that was resisting him and it was Tubbo’s fault.

No one heard the pained scream come from Tubbo.

#dream smp #dream smp roleplay #tubbo #tommyinnit #ghost wilbur #ghostbur #tommy and tubbo #quackity #powerhungry quackity #technoblade #technoblade and tommy are brothers #dream #can i get clout from this #am i a good writer #cw swearing #cw spoilers #spoilers for the newest streams of dsmp #dsmp

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popculturebuffet · 4 years

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Simpsons Review: Simpsons Comics #102 “Uncle Burn$” or Homercore Nudity!

Whelp out of all the commissions Kev has thrown me this one’s kind of a curveball. I mean it makes sense why cover it: It’s a pastiche of Donald Duck Comics done in the pages of the Simpsons long running comics. I cover duck stuff on here, and not only do I love the Simpsons but I tend to reference it for jokes a LOT. I just genuinely never thought of reviewing it till now, likely because earlier on in my new career of reviewing animated shows, I wasn’t really convinced I could do pure comedies. With my regular reviews of Darkwing Duck and as it comes out coverage of the Loud House (I still need to get around to Band Together), that’s no longer a real issue and I should consider doing the show in the future, especially since I have an unabashed love for the first 10 seasons and a few episodes beyond that.

As you can tell, I love the Simpsons. While I do genuinely wish it would end and have no real intrest in the current seasons, though if you’d like me to take a look i’d be willing to. The show in it’s prime was funny, witty and each episode was crammed with jokes. And refreshingly for an adult cartoon show of it’s time, the show genuinely wasn’t afraid to mix things up: Milhouse’s parents divorced and stayed that way for so long that them apparently getting back together decades later is itself a huge status quo shake up. Lisa went Vegetarian which stuck thanks to sir paul mcartney, and then went Buddhist, both of which have never wavered since and both fit her well. Skinner and Krabbable started dating. Barney went sober for a few seasons. Apu got married. These are minor changes but the show does have things happen occasionally and doesn’t just snap everything back and it adds genuine tension to plots knowing they might stay the status quo They usually don’t but the occasional change gives things stakes. I could go on for days, but I couldn’t go on for 8 weeks, point is the Simpsons are awesome, and deserve the praise they get early on I just wish they’d stop as by this point people really have stopped carring and it’s time to pass the torch and Let Bob’s burgers be the wholesome family comedy that runs forever.. and even then that one should stop at 10 seasons. Or if not at least let the kids age dammit. But that aside, while many of you simpsons fans looking at this probably have at least seen the comics, or a collection of them over the decades, many of you like me are wondering what the hell Bongo Comics is and how they managed to last so long. Bongo was founded by Simpsons Creator Matt Groening in 1993. Matt Groening had noticed that at the time there just weren’t any funny books on the shelves, funny books being comedy based comics primarily targeted for kids, with Archie and Disney being really the only ones left at the time. So he founded Bongo to rectify that, and given Fox naturally liked the sound of more merchandising dollars, the publisher was primarily used to produce simpsons comics, though looking at wikipedia there were one or two that weren’t including, of all things, a Coldplay comic tying into their album. Why did Coldplay publish a comic book at a primarily simpsons comic book company?

Though most series seem to be either short lived or one shots, there were a few exceptions: Naturally the company put out an annual Treehouse of Horror issue, there was a Bart Simpson ongoing focusing on him and the other kids of Springfield, I had a trade for that one once, and once Futurama premiered it too got a comic book that held through both cancelations. But standing above them all was Simpsons Comics, a 245 issue long runner that ran all the way up to the company’s closing, likely due to a combination of a lack of profits and the then upcoming Disney-Fox merger depriving them of the very heart and soul of the company.

Naturally being a Simpsons fan I have a connection to these comics having gotten the trades out of the library multiple times as well as the collection of Bartman’s solo series, which was my favorite and I might cover some day. In addition to the Free Comic Book Day issues i also picked up scattered issues over my life since, much like Archie, Simpsons comics were a mainstay of bookstores and super markets and the decline of both comic markets is likely why the Simpsons comics started to peter out in the first place. The quality and memorability of the stories varied but they were a fun thing to have around and it’s sad to see them go, as well as see Disney not even make a remote attempt to bring them back or at the very least republish the vast library they now have access to. Also finally if your wondering yes, there indeed was a Simpsons/Futurama crossover. And no I have not read it. So with that history, most of which I just learned some of which I already knew, in mind, it is very fitting the comic’s did a tribute to the Uncle Scrooge comics. Though it does feel very weird that I have yet to cover any Donald Duck or Scrooge comics.. yet i’ve already covered one of the Ducktales tie in comics and a Simpsons homage to it. I’m going to have to correct that but until then, join me under the cut as I dive into adventure with the Simpsons.

This issue was written by Ian Boothby and drawn by John Delaney, I feel mentiong the writers and artists should be important in comic reviews and I kick myself for not having done that or gone into them as much before. Boothby was apparently the Ian Flynn of these comics, writing more simpsons comics than any other writer according to wikipedia and winning an Eisner for his work on the comic if sadly not this issue. He was nominated for an outstanding Canadian Writer award for it though so that’s good. Point is the guy is a decorated vetran of this series and it shows in how good this issue is and I felt he deserved some recognition as most Comic Book Readers, myself included up till now, likely weren’t aware he even existed nor took over the comic in the 2000′s.

We open with Burns getting attacked by a mummy! Gotta say wasn’t expecting this as where we started out but the simpsons have started with wonkier premises to end up somewhere. I mean there was the time a bag boy strike ended up with them in Africa. Also i’d say Burns should call the police, being the kind of privileged white guy they actually care about protecting and all, but frankly the Springfield Cops don’t have the best track records with Mummies:

But no it’s just Smithers, who dove in heroically to save the company 15 dollars after Homer took a bet to see how many fire crackers he could jam in his computer’s disk drive. Lenny said 20 but he proved him wrong. And yes those are all actual jokes from the comic, this issue is very funny and feels very much like a Golden Age Simpsons episode. They also all gather to sign Smither’s cast.. which naturally is a legally binding contract. Burns takes his loyal minion to get some quality medical care only to find an arcade because he traded the Medical Bay in for one during an outbreak of Pac Man Fever... again I really can’t top that and there may be a good reason why I haven’t covered the Simpsons till now. But yeah as Buns gives Smithers a roll of Pennies, he wonders who to have replace Smither’s on their annual summer treasure hunt.. which would come out of nowhere but we genuinely don’t know what they do most summers. I assumed Burns just road Smithers like a horse to play cricket while Smithers enjoyed it way too much. But a stray comment from Homer getting a Krusty Doll from a crane machine about being king of the treasure hunters leads to this.

I mean it’s an easy joke but damn if it didn’t get a laugh out of me. So later at the old Simpsons place, because this comic is fantastic, Marge and Homer talk things over, but Homer insists Burns said he’d split the treasure, and Lisa wishes she could come along. And Marge says he should, especially for his own saftey.. and when Bart complains, says all the kids should go, she already packed their bags, she’s heading to Rancho Relaxo byyyyeeeeeee. Once again, this comic is amazing, and I would say this is out of character for Marge, but frankly that’s the whole point. Plus it really isn’t when she has to deal with 4 children on a regular basis, and her sisters, and a town gone mad.. yeah can’t blame her here.

The next day at Burns Office, Homer is wearing his navy outfit.. or rather Donald’s Navy outfit. But given I did a quick google and found him having at least 4 different outfits during his time in the Naval Reserves, it’s not a stretch to assume the Simpsons Version of the Navy gave these out too. Seriously Ian Boothby has put more thought into continuity than most writers on the show proper. Also Simpsons Tide, season 9 episode, still very memorable and hilarious and not due to childhood nostalgia. Just looking up this bit had me laughing hard.

youtube

I now want to watch that episode sometime soon so thanks Kev. Anyway Homer seems to have misplaced his plants. Now I could spare you the image since I don’t do things panel by panel anymore and only use panels from a comic when relevant. Buttttt

This traumatizing of my audience brings me to a point about this issue and why it works. While there are tons of nods to the Donald Duck comics and what their homaging is very clear, the issue doesn’t REQUIRE you know them to enjoy it. Knowing them I obviously enjoy it more, but most of the jokes aren’t reliant on you knowing anything about the barks comics and even someone with a passing knowledge of the Original Ducktales can still get the reference if not why Donald is here. It helps this is less of a parody, with the exception of some jokes, and more of an homage, using stylistic elements of those comics while telling i’ts own story as a loving tribute to it’s predecessors. Speaking of one of those jokes poking fun at the source material, Burns is delighted Homer brought child labor, which kept me laughing for a good minute, and when the kids introduce themselves we get this bit.

Not only am I 100% sure every version of Donald or Della did this to make sure they could tell them apart, very much including the reboot with Donald, but it’s a genuine hilarious bit. Donald’s response as they head off is “there’s somehting hooey Dewey and screwy about this. “ Also I will criticize the fact Bart isn’t the one wearing a blue outfit. For those wondering why, after all Maggie wears blue shouldn’t she get it, who haven’t seen this a LOT of merchandise early on had Bart in a blue shirt, due to early Merch being rushed out pre-show and since he wore one in some earlier concept art, he got to wear blue. He also wore it late into the 90′s.

Sidebar: I just found this and while it isn’t a bad joke given his character it is questionable to have a fourth grade boy tell you to buy him. Just saying. But the reason I bring it up is partly because the show itself referenced it at one point.

As well as it’s sister show Futurama

And you remeber that Bart Simpson solo I mentioned? That one frequently, both in and out of story, had Blue Shirt bart show up for some variety.

Also why yes each issue does have it’s own fun “Superman’s Pal Jimmy Oleson” Esque subtitle. And I love it so. Point is Blue Bart is part of the series legacy and this very comic company, so it’s VERY weird to not have that here. That being said there were a few Green Shirt barts apparently as a printing error, so he could just as easily be 80 steps ahead of me. I just don’t know.

Back at the plot Burns and the Simpsons show up at Frink’s lab, Frink rather obviously filling in for Gyro, with his own version of little bulb named F.L.O. who gladly shakes Lisa’s hand.. and releases a Pterodactyl but hey you can’t win em all. It’s a nice nod, though one only fans of the source matieral will really get, but the pterodactyl bit right after helps distract from it. Frink slotts into the roll well, as Frink has no reall affiliation with anyone and is basically, much like Gyro, there for various characters to go too when the story or joke needs him. Frink has two gadgets for them: Some Scuba suits that can go to any depth and a grappling claw that accidently gets him gripped to the pterodactyl. Also homer accidently switches suits with maggie, so we get an adorable shot of her serenely sleeping in a diving helmet while her daddy chokes to death.

So the next day it’s out to the open seas where The Simpsons are doing all the work while Burns lounges.. which yeah this is a typical uncle scrooge adventure all right. While the man unlike Burns does work hard and do things for himself, he spent most voyages talking about the destination while putting all the hard work on Donald, in case you thought there was at least one universe where Donald isn’t miserable most of the time. Lisa wonders what he’s doing and we get this lovely bit.

I just.. can’t stop finding that hilarious or a nice way to get the Uncle Scrooge bit in there while still fitting the Simpsons, and it at least explains what happened to Herb, whose been mentioned all of once in the 30 seasons since he last showed up. I checked. And yes for those unaware, which is fair, or who just now remembered Homer does indeed have a brother, one his dad had out of an affair who showed up twice, once with Homer unintentionally, and largely due to Herb’s own foolishness, ruining his life, the other time with Maggie helping him get back on top and him and Homer reconciling. He’s also voiced by comedic legend and your friend and mine, Danny Devito, whose still making us all laugh to this day and is a wonderful person from all accounts. Rock on Danny, here’s the only way I can think to honor you.

But yeah it’s a good gag. Burns claims to be watching for a Giant Squid.. and turns out to be right. So it’s up to the simpsons to fight the giant squid, a sentence I genuinely didn’t expect.. I thought like the Griffins they’d just ignore it.

I miss that show.. oh i’m aware Family Guy is still running but much like the Simpsons the show it USED to be is long gone. Anyways Bart tells a worried homer octopus suck out the innards and drink it first quipping “It’s not like you haven’t been drunk in the morning before homer. Homer chokes bart only for the squid to choke him which is easily the second best “Homer getting choked after Choking bart” gag i’ve seen.. the best being this one I found on youtube.

youtube

Though personally my faviorite part of that whole bit is Bart’s proud “THAT’S BECAUSE I SOAKED HIM IN SLIME!” Anyways Lisa figures out a way to beat the squid, painting the likeness of each of them on it’s tentacles and letting the thing devour itself. Lisa lampshades it making no sense PHysics wise but with that she reluctantly accepts calling Mr. Burns, Uncle Burns and we’re off to our next location. Next up is Mt. Donrosa, a very clear nod to Uncle Scrooge maestro Keno “Don” Rosa, an avid fan of Barks work who expanded on it and turned it into a solid continuity, most famously, and what got me into the ducks in the first place, with the epic “Life and Times of Scrooge McDuck” which I proudly own and.. well I did say watch this space didn’t I? Enough hinting at the future as the Simpsons scale the mountain with Homer carrying burns up on a rickshaw. Burns however looses his lucky #1 penny, SUBTLE, and cuts Bart down to get it. We then get the best line of the issue:

Bart thankfully survives and we find out the Penny, much like Scrooge’s Dime is how Burns started his fortune.. for this issue and nowhere else but that’s standard for the Simpsons. Specifically loading it into a gun and threatning to kill Jasper’s grandfather with it during the gold rush, a nice twist. At the top of the mountain they find the fabled key of Strobl, which comes from the Taliaferro tribe.. more refrenes this time though I didn’t know them and had to google. Tony Strobl was an artist on the Duck Comics at one ponit and Al Taliforino id forgotten about. He did the Donald Duck comic strip which I had heard of and weirdly hasn’t been collected yet despite Fantagraphics covering mickey, as well as reprinting barks and rosa’s respective works.

The key is suspended in the air by what Lisa suspects to be magnetics, and while Burns plan is naturally “Have Bart swim in it and see if he surivives”, Bart, still pissed from the penny and not wanting to die today, grabs the Penny and uses his slingshot to fire it at the Key. The bad luck from the penny casues an erruption, but Bart once again saves the day and has them surf down, with naturally tons more great jokes. The family enjoys some steamed Seafood, except Lisa whose eating Seaweed, while Homer enjoys a sting ray “It tastes as good as it stings, Ow, Ow.” ON to Goddfrodson Trench, an odd choice given Floyd Goddfrodson was barks equivalent for the Mickey Mouse Comics and not really a duck writer, but he still deserves the honor regardless. Under the Sea, no accusations just friendly crustaceans here.. our heroes are close to the treasure but loose the map to the Jailbird Boys, aka Snake and his cousins, who found out due to Lisa’s blog. She didn’t want to loose any more readers to Sheri and Teri’s Olson Twin’s Fan Page.. which.. it’s 2004.. weren’t they dead by this point? Nope still alive? Still are today in fact? Alrighty then. Also this bit, and some of the other references are a bit heavy handed, I will admit that, but the jokes are high quality enough otherwise that it just comes off as a bit of an adorable wink more than laziness.

Snake and co cut their air with Starfish used as throwing stars.

The gang tie their air suplies to avoid dying, and Maggie, in a clever bit, talks with the starfish, since they communicate via sucking, to attack the Jailbird Boys. Again..

I genuinely don’t know, but our heroes find the fabled vault of Barks Billion.. named after Bark Barks, that polar bear from the sonic games.. no of course it’s named after Disney Duck God Carl Barks, who created the Duck’s share of Donald and Scrooge’s supporting cast: Uncle Scrooge himself, Daisy Duck, a fact I just learned but given he created her first short “Mr Duck Steps Out, shouldn’t of surprised me, The Beagle Boys, Magica DeSpell, Goldie O Gilt, Flintheart Glomgold, Gyro Gearloose, Gladstone Gander, The Junior Woodchucks as a whole, Neighbor Jones, John D. Rockerduck, The Number One Dime, Gus Goose, April, May, June and Whitewater Duck. Just the sheer impact he’s had on the comics on all continents cannot be overstated. He is also the one who refined Huey Dewey and Louie from hellraising little shits to the good little boys they are today.. well okay they were, thankfully the reboot has created much better versions. Point is what a man, what a man what a mighty good man, he is truly missed. We get two great homer gags in the same page, one where somehow he’s put the giant key on a key ring and still can’t find it.. with Bart helpfully taking it from him, and then we get this, which I missed on my first read through.

Naturally Burns betrays them, using a Gold Magnet, kay, to suck up all the gold and naturally planning to leave the Simpsons for dead to no one’s surprise. But thanks to Bart teaching Maggie how to use the spittoons, Homer gets one stuck on his head.. and starts getting sucked up with the Simpsons using them to escape. Naturally Lisa’s first instinct is obvious.

But Burns weasels his way out by promising them free gold after their free lunch. Naturally the next day this turns out ot be a trick as their lunch came from frinks and thus, for now, their weightless.. but Karma gets Burns when he tries swimming in his new gold vault... only for the natural result of what happens when am an who never exercises and who doctors once described as having so many diseases packed into his body at once they tripped each other off and that a strong wind could kill him, trying to do with a similarly aged but still physically fit and well trained at swimming in money man does on a daily basis.

We then close on a quick gag of weightless homer getting caught on fire and we’re out.

Final Thoughts: This was a really excellent comic. It captured the tone of the Simpsons at their best and while stiff in a place here or there, it’s mostly just really funny, entertaining and a nice and warm tribute to Donald and Scrooge’s long comics history, not really mocking it but instead just homaging it, while still throughly feeling like the Simpsons. It honestly feels like the Treehouse of Horor Segement on the shining, a bit that parodies something, but for the most part the jokes still feel firmly rooted in the simpsons and their cast. This was a treat to review and i’m glad Kev comissoned it and I may take a look at more Simpsons in the future. If you guys like this review, you can follow me on patreon at patreon.com/popculturebuffet, or if there’s a specific simpsons or ducktales episode or a specific comic you want me to review, you can comission your own review for just five bucks. Just send me a direct message on here through Tumblr, or take a look at my ask box or submit. However you want to do it. I take payments through paypal and until next time: Happy Days are Here Again.

#scrooge mcduck #the simpsons #carl barks #simpsons comics #montgomery burns #homer simpson #bart simpson #lisa simpson #maggie simpson #don rosa #professor frink #bongo comics #waylond smithers #reviews #ducktales

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