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inquisitive-mess · 3 years

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A Slice of Happiness Part 4

Including Sibylle of Cleves by @blackdiamondwrites127 and Katherine Tudor by @ellielovesdrawing

Mention of William Parr by @weirdbutdecentart100 and Jane Paker by @altairtalisman

T/W: Past Trauma

It was two am and Ann couldn't sleep thanks to what happen earlier. Ever since her late dinner with Sibylle and Kath, her mind kept on running with doubt and uneasiness, which the reason why she having trouble sleeping. She knew Kath didn't mean what she said, since she doesn't know her past and was reincarnate like herself and Sibylle. Deep down Ann knew this was a bad idea to begin with because she wasn't mentally ready for people to know her life. She alway keep quiet about it and try to hide it, so people don't be interested in ask her about it. She doesn't like talking about her past and her growing up in modern time. Not to say her past life was bad, but it was hard for her explain to people since nobody would understand how she felt in those time. Her time here is a totally different story and one she doesn't want to remember. It also didn't help that Ann felt awful about how it turn out. Ann just completely shut down once she heard those words and just wanted hide. She felt so ready to get out of here and go to her place, where she know she would safe, but she can't. She knows once she did that, it would only make the situation worse with Sibylle and Kath. Plus she had no way on getting there, since the Tube is closed and she had no clue where she was to walk there.

After tossing and turning some more, Ann decided to get up from the bed to get some water hoping it would help her calm her mind. Ann slowly open the door, peeked her head out to look around before stepping out, turn the flashlight on her phone, and quietly head to the kitchen. She didn't want to wake Sibylle or Kath up, since she already cause too much trouble for them and she wasn't ready to interact with anyone. When she got to the kitchen, she moved her flashlight around as she walk around and quietly check the cupboards to see if she can find a cup. She prefer a disposable one, so she doesn't make a mess for them. She end up not finding one, but did found where the cups were at. She took one making a mental note to wash it when she done with it, went to the fridge to pour herself cup of water from water dispenser, and took a sip of it. It help her, but not much, so she used her phone light to walk to the table where she was earlier and sat down on one of the chair as she place the cup on the table. She sighed softly and try to think of a way to calm her mind. She notice some magazines stacked on the table and decided to look through them to see if this will do it. After spending a good time looking through all of them using her phone as her light, she finished the last one in the stack and place it back on top. She felt more awake than before and learn a bit about bakery appliances, motorcycles, pet care, and news articles. It probably would be things she won't be ask, but it helps to know a few things just in case. Ann ran out of ideas on what to do and knew she going to really tired when she gets to work.

Her stomach then grumble and place her hand on it. She figured that it was because the macaroni and cheese didn't fill her up. She knew there no way she going to go through their food and eat something that doesn't belong to her. She also can't ignore it either, because it bought back memories of her being hungry and the pain she felt. She then remembered that her dessert was in the fridge, so she got up and went to it. She open the door, took her dessert out, turn around as she closed the door, and place on the kitchen counter. She took the lid off the pan and look at her dessert. The whipped topping got a little ruin thanks to sticking to the lid a little. She thinks when she accidently bump into that guy is why this happened, but she didn't mind it and can smell the coffee flavor alcohol coming from it. She was so really to finally try it, but she stop herself. Her mind was telling her that she didn't deserve it and shouldn't eat it. She tighten her fists as she looked at it and was thinking about how she cause nothing, but trouble for Sibylle and Kath the moment she step foot in the house. She though on giving them as apology gift, but knew that only insult them and make them think that Kath creation wasn't good enough for her. " So that what in the pan..." Ann got scared when she heard this voice and turn around nothing realizing that she swung her arm, which hit something hard with her fist. When she move her flashlight up to see who she hit and saw it Sibylle, she low her arm quickly and told her as she apologize "I'm so sorry" Sibylle was rubbing her arm where Ann hit her, which surprised her by how strong it was, but remembered that Ann must move a lot stuff in her shop in a daily basis. Sibylle answer " It's okay. I did surprised you, so it naturally to act out of instinct and defend yourself." Ann look down to ground still feel bad that she hit Sibylle. Sibylle look at Ann and told her " Why don't you take a seat and I'll make ourselves coffee to go with the tiramisu. You can't eat this without something to drink, plus you have to give it time to rest a little before eating it. Something about enriches the flavors a bit. I'm not too familiar with this." Ann nodded and head back to the table to seat down as she turn the flashlight off and waiting for Sibylle.

Ann was twiddling her thumbs as she watched Sibylle turn on the kitchen light and begin making the coffee for them. She didn't know what to say to her and how Sibylle is going react toward her. She expects Sibylle be angry with her on how she been acting so far and tell her how horrible of person she is, which Ann believes she is. Once Sibylle was done setting it up and put it to brew, she walk to the table where Ann is sitting and sat across from her. Ann gather up courage to said " Siby, I..." but Sibylle stop her by putting her hand up and said sincerely " You don't need to say anything. I understand." Sibylle put hand back down and continue " It's my fault I didn't tell Kath that you were an orphan. I know you told me not tell anyone that you're a reincarnate or you were back, but I could tell her that at least, so it didn't end up that badly." Sibylle took a deep breath and said " I'm sorry this happened Ann. I'm sure if Kath was awake, she would apologize too." Ann was surprised that Sibylle was apologizing to her, but she didn't think she or Kath need to. She knew it wasn't their fault this happened and need to tell them that, so she collected herself and said " Siby, I don't blame for you or Kath for what happen. It's my fault that I reacted like that when I heard Kath mention my parents." She stop twiddling her thumbs and spoke "I haven't thought about my parents in a long time, so I don't know if they would be proud of me or not. My father died when I was really young and my mother died when I was in my teens. I'm sorry that I made you guys think it was your fault." Ann smile a little afterwards to show she was okay. Sibylle listen to Ann and could understand where she was coming from. She too felt like this when she first got reincarnate and didn't know if her parents would of approve of her past actions in her new life. Luckily, her mother did come back and was able to tell her about it. The coffee maker made a sound indicating that it was done and Sibylle got up. She head to it, went to the cupboards to grab to mugs, and ask Ann " How do you like it?" Ann replied " Cream and a little bit of sugar" Sibylle nod and start making it.

After she was done, she carry the two mugs to the table as she said " There may be a chance you won't ever get your answer, but I'm sure your foster parents would been proud of you." This stung Ann a little inside when she heard this and didn't known if she should say something. When Sibylle hand Ann her mug, Ann grab it, thank her, and drank a little of it. Sibylle soon sat down and took a sip of it. Ann put her mug down as she stare at it a little before telling Sibylle " I can't say I know that, since I would need to be in system for that to happen." She knew didn't need to make that comment, but she need to correct Sibylle since she felt like she was lying to her, if she didn't. Sibylle heard this as she put her mug down and didn't understand it at first, until it clicked and felt bad for what she had said. Ann notice this and explained as she moved her mug around a little " I wasn't lucky enough to get adopted. Nobody wanted a teenager and they only picked the younger kids. It hurt me everytime adopt days happen, because it always ended the same way. Eventually, I just decided to stay in my room on those days and stayed at the orphanage, until I was legal age to leave." There was lot she left out, but she wasn't emotional ready to tell it. She knew the reason why she wasn't adopted and why she deserved to stay there. Sibylle place one of her hand on Ann hand and told her sincerely " I may not ever understand how that feels, but I know for sure that those stupid people miss a great opportunity on not having you as their child and witness how far come." This made Ann tear up a little when she heard this because it felt nice to hear something so generous. Sibylle then let go of Ann and said " To tell you the truth, getting adopted wasn't that great as it turn out to be. I felt more at home in juvie than in one of those foster homes. Also that where I met Papabär, but I think you know that already." Ann nodded to show that she does, but it was nice to hear this coming from Sibylle. While they were talking, Kath walk into the kitchen half wake and head to where Sibylle and Ann were. She got near Sibylle, which she turn her head to look at Kath with a soft smile and said " Hey there babe, did we wake you up?" Kath grumble a little before taking the mug from Sibylle and took a sip of the coffee, which Kath face scrunched when it was too dull for her. Sibylle chuckle a little when she saw this and told her " Let me serve you a cup while you take a seat next to me. The usual?" Kath slowly nodded before sitting down while Sibylle got up and went to kitchen to get Kath her coffee. Ann stay quiet as she watch their interaction and thought it was cute. Kath haven't notice Ann was there and was trying to stay awake while Ann went on drink her coffee and was thinking on how she going to interact with Kath.

As Ann was contemplating, she notice the scars on Kath and wondering if she got them when she was in the gang. She remembered Jane mentioned that Kath was in one too, but left for reason. Ann learn that if it was similar to why Sibylle left, then she isn't going to ask her. Sibylle came back with Kath coffee and place it in front of her. Kath soon grab it and took a big sip of her black coffee. She smile when she put her mug down and wait for the caffeine to kick in. Sibylle then sat down and when back to her coffee while Ann finally notices that she can see the scars Sibylle has due to her accident. She grip her mug handle little tightly as she thought about it. She wish she had the confidence to not think about her marks she has and not be ashamed by them, but she can't. Everytime she looks at her own, it only brought back bad memories and what kind of person she was. As Ann was thinking, Sibylle saw Ann was deep in though and ask her " Hey Ann" This snap Ann out of her train of thought and Sibylle continued " Are you alright?" Ann loosen her hold on her mug and answer " Yeah, I'm okay" Sibylle notice Ann was distracted by something until she realized that Ann maybe felt uncomfortable with hers and possibly Kath scars. Sibylle normally doesn't show them, so people don't know she has some unless you know her personally while Kath has no issues as long you don't ask anything personal. Sibylle then ask Ann " Is there something that bothering you, Ann? You can tell us what it is and see what can do about it." Ann was confused when she heard this and didn't understand where this was coming from. Did she do something wrong to alert them? Was it when she space out when she was thinking too hard? Ann shook her head and said " There nothing wrong. I was just thinking about something, that's all." Sibylle wasn't buy it and knew something was wrong, but couldn't prove it. Kath then spit it out taking notice of Ann" Does it have to do ours scar? You can tell us and we can grab something to cover them." Ann was totally caught off guard what Kath had said while Sibylle sighed at Kath. She knew how grumpy Kath can get in the morning, so this is nothing new. At least she was going to get some answer. Ann collected himself and answer Kath " Yes, but it's not what you think. Let me explain" Ann looked at both Sibylle and Kath and said " As Siby told you before, I know a bit about her past, so I was kind of curious on how bad the accident was for her to change life. After seeing it in person, it made me see why and appreciate her more. As Siby knows already, I have respect for her on how she was able to overcome her obstacles and change to be a better person. Same goes for you, Kath. I wasn't told much about your past, but I'm not going bother you with that because I can already tell how far you came and how good of person you are." Ann smile a little when she was done and spoke the truth. Sibylle knew what Ann said was true thanks to their pervious talk while Kath didn't expect to hear this. She was surprised by Ann words and was touched when she said she wasn't bothered by their scars or their past history.

After their little chat, Sibylle ask Kath " Hey babe, how long does Ann dessert to be out to rest?" Kath answer now fully awake " About 20-30min" Sibylle nod and said " Okay Ann, I think it's good now to eat your tiramisu. Do want me to get it for you?" Ann shook her head, got up, and said " I can get it. You did enough already for me. Plus I got to pour myself more coffee." Ann grab her mug, head to the kitchen to the coffee maker, and begin pouring her coffee into her mug. As she was doing it, she heard Kath and Sibylle talking about what happen earlier at dinner. Kath blame herself for opening an old wound that Ann had and thinking she wasn't a good host while Sibylle is trying to tell her calmly that Ann doesn't blame her. Ann stop pouring, put the pot back in the machine, and look down at her mug. This feeling she had this whole time has become real and she knew what she need to do. She need to grab her things and get out of here. She can't keep on hurting them like this and didn't want the past repeating itself due to how terrible of person she was. She left everything there, stealthily walk away from the kitchen, which worked when she saw they haven't notice her gone, went to the room, grab her stuff, and quietly started to head to the front door. She felt bad for leaving like this, but it was for their own good. She was tired of people getting hurt and not being able to protect them because she was too weak or watching them get killed in front of her, which she knows isn't that common anymore, but can still happen. When she got to the door, she put her hand on the doorknob and try to convince herself one last time to stay, but the flashback of crying and screaming rang in her mind. She then decided this was the right choice, so she turn the knob and pull on the door, but a hand appeared behind her, which place itself on top of the door and push it back to closed. Ann froze when she saw this and she didn't know what to do. Sibylle then ask in a serious tone " Ann, what are you doing?" Ann started to shake a little when she heard this because she didn't expect to be caught and was worry what Sibylle is going to do to her. Before she had a chance to explain, Sibylle grab Ann by her wrist and dragged her back to the table where Kath was at without resisting. Once they were there, Sibylle told Ann to sit and she sat while Sibylle sat back in her seat across from her, place both her arms on the table, and ask her in a more serious tone " I'm going ask you again Ann, what are you doing? Do you know what time it is? Do you want us to worry about you? What were you thinking?" Ann keep her head down and her hands were shaking a bit on her lap as she heard all of Sibylle's questions. She didn't know how to answer her because all she was thinking about is how much trouble she cause and wishing she didn't accept Sibylle invite to come here. Kath got up from her seat, walk to where Ann, saw her hands were shaking, and ask her " Ann, you're not in trouble. We just want to know why you were trying to leave all of a sudden. Did something happen? What's going on?" Ann stay quiet as she heard Kath and didn't want them to know. Kath look sad and said " Does it have to do with what happen earlier at dinner? Did I hurt you so bad that I cause you want to leave here? Don't you want us to be your friend?"

This is when Ann started to tear up and her whole body began to shake a little once she heard Kath. Something inside Ann begin cracking and she couldn't hold her feeling much longer. Kath and Sibylle saw this and didn't know what was going on until Ann finally answer " I do" She look up at both at them with tears in her eyes and continue " I really do want to be your guys friend, but due to past experiences, I'm afraid that I would only cause you guys nothing but trouble and eventually hurt you guys." Both them looked at each other as they heard Ann and she explained " I heard you guys talking when I was in the kitchen and Kath starting blaming herself for what happen. I knew right there that it was happening again and couldn't handle pain I was causing. That when I decided that I need to leave here and spare you guys from that faith." Ann tighten her hands as she continue shaking and said " I been so nervous this whole time and worry that I would overthink everything and mess things up, since this is my first time spending the night at someone house. That why I been trying so hard not to ask for anything and been a little quiet." They both heard this and felt a little bad pressuring her like this. Sibylle though Ann was just being subborn this whole time, but taking in everything she learned so far, most of Ann's actions did make sense to someone who hasn't been exposed to certain things. Kath gave Ann a hug and told her " It's okay. We understand to be afraid of something. We all have our fears." Ann smiled a little, calm down a bit, and wasn't shaking anymore. Sibylle did want to ask Ann something that been bugging her. Sibylle didn't know if this was a good time to ask this, but knew this may be her only chance, so she looked at Ann and ask her " Ann, does these past experiences have to do with our terms we made?" Ann froze when heard this and knew this day would come. She knew someone was going to ask her why she didn't want anyone know she was back. Ann looked down and answer " Yes" Sibylle suspicion was right and asked " Do you want to talk about it? I know it isn't right for us to ask you for this, but I think it's a good idea to do so. I think telling us would make your mind at ease and help you in a way." Kath let go of Ann and walk to Sibylle as she stand next to her. She was kind of confused on what was going, but she sure she will understand soon. Ann took time to think about this and wondering if this was a good idea to do. She hasn't talk to anyone how she felt in a long time and only onse who knows was Will and Jane. It was time to do that. Ann gather all of the confidence she had, look at them, and said " Maybe it's time to tell my story..."

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#six #six oc #sixtended verse #Ann Parr #Sibylle of Cleves #Katherine Tudor #kinda lied...but I need divided this part since it got too long

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dreamcatcherjiah · 3 years

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PART 10

💞Tight Hearts (Idol!Hoseok x Reader)

Plot: The red string of fate was visible when our grandparents were children. They would play around, following the strings from one person to their soulmate and laugh happily when these two people inevitably found each other. It was a reason for happiness. But little by little, people stopped seeing the threads. In bad times, it was dangerous, it was a liability, so people stopped seeing them to protect each other from harm. When I was born, nobody saw them anymore, they just felt their soulmate. Anxiety, happiness, sorrow, love, the hearts of the soulmates are one, feel the same things, but it is almost impossible to find your soulmate, now that the threads cannot be seen.

Tight Hearts Masterlist

Part 10

Organising how many cars you would take became easier as this time there were eight people to be taken to Big Hit’s headquarters. Taehyung and Jungkook had shown up in the kitchen while you were on the shower and, just as you were turning the corner into the room, finished cleaning after eating. Apparently, their routine hadn’t changed a bit with you intruding in them. After another awkward round of introductions and some whispered greetings, Namjoon took the lead again and divided everyone into pairs to get into the cars when he got the go from the manager. Hoseok, always thoughtful, had charged your phone thinking that you would like to call in sick and tell everyone you were feeling okay and you hadn’t dropped half dead in the middle of some street… Which you had, but no one needed to know the full, gory details. Smiling, you didn’t think much of it as you rolled into the balls of your feet and pressed a small kiss to the apple of his cheek. Boastful peels of laughter surrounded the both of you as his bandmates witnessed the public display of affection, causing you to blush and hide your face in your hands; getting used to this noisy group of men was going to take some getting used to, more with their new hobby of making every little thing Hoseok or you did into the funniest joke they’d ever heard. Chancing a look at your soulmate, you relaxed seeing how he had taken the loud teasing in a good-natured way and was just hugging a laughing Taehyung to his chest. The environment around these men was refreshing, calming your anxious thoughts and bringing the first real smile that your soulmate hadn’t put in your lips.

“Will you look at that! She can smile too!” Namjoon teased, throwing an arm around your shoulders and giving you a little shake, “I was starting to think this was going to be awkward once Jin Hyung ran out of jokes to tell you, Y/N. I know they’re bad but you can stop laughing after he drops the punchline, he likes you already!”

“YA!” Screamed the eldest, “she likes my jokes! And,” he added, turning his eyes on you and seeing how you still smiled genuinely at him, “I am not running out. They’re my natural talent, I was born with both my jokes and my handsome face,” he finished taking his hand in a grand gesture to his mouth and throwing a flamboyant air kiss in yours and Namjoon’s general direction.

Jungkook threw himself at Jin and hung himself from the bigger man like an overgrown koala. The room descended into chaos as both of them play-fought and the rest of the guys either went for their phones to record the mock wrestling match or cheered them on. In the midst of their voices and bodies, Hoseok made his way towards you and took your hand in his. His presence did a good job of getting rid of any residual uneasiness you may have been feeling, the same way yours did away with Hoseok’s nervousness. You realised that part of what you had been feeling came from the man standing slightly behind you; even before the two of you met in person, you had noticed how he’d always put on a brave front, smiling even when his whole body wanted him to collapse and, perhaps without him knowing, he had relapsed into the same old routine: mask what he was feeling behind his happy-go-lucky persona.

“Hey,” you whispered, keeping an eye out for the other six men in the room, you didn’t need them noticing such a private moment, “relax, whatever they say there, they’re not taking me anywhere,” you noticed as his body relaxed, his shoulders dropping a few inches, as the words registered in his brain, “whatever works for us.”

With a small tilt in the corner of his mouth, his hand tightened around yours and, as the rest of his brothers calmed down and Namjoon gave the last instructions, got closer to you until not only your hands were touching, but your arms as well. You fantasised with allowing your head to rest a while on his shoulder, breathing deeply and calmly so both of you relaxed a bit before facing what felt like a court that would decide on your future. Coming back to reality, you straightened your treacherous neck, which was nearly about to give into your secret wishes, and turning your head in his direction, smiled at how he was already looking at you. His eyes formed crescents, his feet started moving and he took you, hand in hand, to the car.

Once the car door closed behind you, Hoseok put his arm around you, helping you get comfortable against his chest so that your head rested on his shoulder. Taking a deep breath, you felt as every last cell of your body tuned itself to Hoseok’s and you could finally breath again. His hand settled atop your head, his fingers buried deep, caressing your scalp and following the tresses of your hair to return again with its sweet ministrations.

“Thank you,” whispered Hoseok.

Not wanting to move and disturb the spell surrounding you both, you only hummed and nudged your cheek closer to his collarbone, as a way of asking him what he meant.

“They love you already, Namjoonie is so comfortable around you, even Yoongi Hyung told me while you were in the shower that I had found an excellent one… That’s a lot for him to say after such a short time, you know?” His voice was quiet, almost as if he had realised something and was at peace with it, “you didn’t have to be so accommodating, so trusting, and yet here we are. Just thank you.”

Throwing your arm around his torso, you hugged him as tight as you could and moved your head so that you could see him resting your chin against his collarbone.

“I don’t know what it is, but I feel like I would trust you with my life. No questions asked,” you chuckled darkly. At his raised eyebrow, you explained, “Does it feel like that for you too? Is it as natural for you as it is for me, the fact that I could very easily die to protect you?” After his nod, you laughed and continued talking, “This would drive my parents insane, if they knew.”

“You haven’t told them yet?” He asked, his hand stilling in your head. You could see some of the previous tension sweeping back into him and you hurried to make it disappear again.

“If these feelings of inadequacy I am sensing come from you, please, believe me when I say that it has nothing to do with me not wanting them to meet you. It’s just they’re not the typical parents. They wanted me to be independent since I was very young and now we aren’t really close.”

“But Y/N, not being close and saying that they would go insane if they found out you had a soulmate are two very different things,” he said, frowning.

You sat up, pouting and looked at him through your eyelashes. He kept eye contact with you, matching your pout and crossing his arms over his chest. Huffing, you sat back and looked ahead while you mulled over what to say to him, what to tell him so that you’d satiate his curiosity.

“You know soulmates are little more than a myth nowadays, right?” You asked, he nodded and raised his eyebrow at you, so you’d continue, “While I was still living with them, my father was very vocal about what his thoughts on the bond were, he would say that us soulmates were mere parasites and that it was all a ploy from the government to rob us of our freedom…”

An indignant little shout reached you at the same time you felt Hoseok jump and turn to face you. His face was hard, set, his lips pouting while his cheeks and ears turned red with agitation. From the moment the topic was brought up, you knew Hoseok wasn’t going to like what you had to say. Everyone, absolutely every person in the world who knew what soulmates were, had an opinion on the matter; good or bad, that usually depended on the case and the personal experiences of every individual but, more often than not, people were VERY vocal about what a pity it was that soulmates were dying out. “With technology as advanced as it is today,” they’d say, “it is just sad that a system to find linked soulmates hasn’t been developed,” with a mellow smile, they would just continue about with their days and forget about the issue altogether. Which you, soulmates, couldn’t do.

“I do not mean to badmouth your father, but that is such a simplistic thought process,” he said, dropping back against the seats. “To think that we have a choice in the matter is just plain ludicrous, and to imply that the government is trying to control people by making them match with their soulmates just shows how little information there really is about the bond. We aren’t like that, you and I.”

He reached for you, with his eyes closed and a troubled look on his face. You simply gravitated towards him, burying yourself against his puffy jacket, linking your arms around him. He sought comfort in knowing you were there, close to him and not leaving.

“No, we are not,” you said, tightening your hold on his torso when a wave of worry and apprehension reached you through the bond, “but people don’t really know that. We are the only pair of soulmates I know of, it kinda is uncharted territory.”

“I don’t care how little they know as long as you get to keep me,” Hoseok whispered, so softly you thought you heard him wrong.

The thought made you stop all your musings and actually think about what your soulmate said. You would have expected to say something along the lines of “I can keep you” or “we can stay together”, but the sole thought of you possessing him, Hoseok, your sweet, caring and incredibly famous soulmate, made you feel a huge lump in your throat.

“If I get to keep you?” You asked, looking up at him and finding him already looking at you.

“I can feel your uneasiness, maybe that was way over the line…” his insecurities were rolling off of him in waves, so strong it nearly gave you whiplash. Seeing how you weren’t answering, he swallowed and continued, “you know how our life is, you’re a fan. We… don’t get to… be normal. We don’t get to go on dates, enjoy the whole “get to know you”, mainly because we never have time. And I know that’s what we wanted but this place we’re in is very lonely. When my grandmother used to tell me about soulmates she would always say how she wholly belonged to my grandfather. As a child that didn’t make much sense, but lately, when my body hurt and I felt how miserable we both were… I just wanted to be yours, to have someone that didn’t always expect me to be okay and would just allow me to be… theirs…”

Somewhere between him saying how lonely he was and telling you he was yours, you had started silently crying, big tears leaving your eyes and staining his jacket. His thumbs suddenly cleaned them off your cheeks, carefully and sweetly, transmitting an incredibly warm feeling that surrounded you both, letting you know without words how sorry he was for making you cry, for overstepping the line he had set himself as his limit.

“I am so sorry for making you sad,” he whispered, leaving a small kiss between your eyebrows.

“So sweet but so clueless,” you hiccuped. At his pout, you chuckled and threw his arms around his neck. Once your face was hidden safely against his shoulder you told him; “I am so sorry you were feeling lonely. And you don’t have to say sorry for telling me how you feel, ever. I was just taken aback, I would have never imagined you’d want to belong to someone you just met…”

“You don’t have to say anything, I am sorry I sprung this on you,” you tightened your hold on his neck, almost chocking him and making him stop.

“I told you we’re in this together, I’ll have you if you’ll have me. That’s my condition,” his arms finally sneaked around your waist and fused your bodies together, ending with any guilt or inadequacy you may have felt.

“Thank you,” he whispered, nesting his face between your neck and your shoulder.

The rest of the trip to BigHit Headquarters passed in either companionable silence or bursts of laughter, which made time fly and, before you knew it, the cars were entering the company’s underground parking lot.

Your car’s door flew open and the maknae line piled inside, looking frantic only to leave the car as soon as they entered.

“They’re alive and decent, Hyung! We’re good to go!” Screamed Taehyung, his black hair hiding his eyebrows and drawing even more attention to his radiant square smile when he turned to continue teasing Hoseok.

As everyone left their cars and walked towards the elevators, manager Sejin hung back to give you a small plastic card with your name on it. He told you that one was provisional, you’d have to give him a recent picture and your full name so he could make one for you. He put a hand on your shoulder telling you to relax and kept walking, leaving you, Hoseok and the rest of BTS alone to ride the elevators to the CEO’s office. The rest of the managers rode together in a different elevator, leaving the eight of you alone. If someone wanted to comment on how Hoseok and you seemed to be joined at the hip, or how neither of you seemed willing to let go of each other’s hands, no one said a word.

“We are going to be there with you both the whole time,” said Seokjin, giving you a sweet smile, “if you hear something you don’t like or don’t agree with, don’t be afraid to speak up. We’ll all back you up.”

“But,” you doubted, until Hoseok tightened his hold on your hand to let you know it was okay, “won’t you get in trouble with the company?”

Jin huffed and looked at you as if you were the most innocent person in the world.

“I…” he started.

“DON’T FOLLOW WHAT THE AGENCY SAYS,” completed the rest of the men, as if they were so used to hearing that same sentence that they couldn’t help completing it themselves.

It served you all to relief the tension as you all dissolved into peals of laughter and you let yourself rest against Hobi’s body. His warmth was a balm for your nerves and, as the door opened to ease you all into the big hall, you felt so much more supported than you had ever felt in your life. These seven tall men, would have your back.

Nocking on the light wooden door and being allowed in, you followed Namjoon and Hoseok and found yourself face to face with a small, smiling woman who wrapped her arms around your shoulders. After a few seconds you realised the woman was Hoseok’s mother, his father and sister standing a bit behind the woman hugging you, next to a bigger man that can’t be any other than Bang PDnim. They smiled at you and Hoseok’s father neared him to give him a light slap on the shoulder.

“Welcome,” said the CEO to all standing, “I thought we’d be more comfortable sitting on the sofas, I prepared some light sweets in case you haven’t had any breakfast,” he focused now on you and smiled. “It’s so nice to meet finally meet you, Y/N. I was so sorry not to meet you yesterday, but I thought it would be better to let you rest. Please sit down and we’ll talk for a bit, then you’ll go with the boys so they show you around and practice for an hour or two. Is that alright?” He asked the rest of the room. When he got a positive answer out of them, he stirred them in the direction of a set of comfortable looking couches at the side of the room.

Hoseok’s mother sat next to you, leaving the other side free so Hoseok could sit next to you, placing your joined hands on his thigh.

“Y/N dear, how did you sleep, you look so refreshed, your cheeks look so lovely blushed!” You laughed and thank the woman, “call me Eomoni, dear”, you wouldn’t tell her your cheeks looked red because her son and you had had a heart to heart in the car, as it seemed was your thing these days, and you had cried your eyes out.

“These two couldn’t stay more than a couple feet apart, eomoni,” said Jimin, “so I offered them my bed so they could keep their distance.”

“Yeah, ‘cause yesterday they would go ‘woohoo’ if they touched,” laughed Jungkook, around a mouthful of banana cake.

Remembering the terrible bumbling messes the both of you became the prior day, your whole face turned beet red and you hid your face against Hoseok’s shoulder.

“As you can see,” added Yoongi, “they don’t start drooling when they touch anymore.”

Another fit of laughter raised from the group and your soulmate’s hand caressed the crown of your head as his body shook in silent laughter.

Bang PDnim took control of the ruckus and got all eyes focused on him again.

“First of all I want to welcome you again to the family, Y/N. We are here for you in any capacity, to help and support both you and Hoseok, but you are free to look for outside consultants if you want to for any legal matter. The only thing we ask of you is to sign a Non-Disclosure Agreement that you will write with Hoseok and your lawyer, then we will look it over and sign as well,” he waited to see if you had any objection and seeing you didn’t, he continued, “For the time being, we would like you both to visit a doctor so you will be able to go about your everyday life once the bond allows you to be apart…”

“NO!” You shouted, putting yourself between Hoseok and the older man, without thinking. Silence reigned in the room after your outburst, “You’re not going to take him from me, are you? Please, I’ll do anything.”

So focused on Bang PDnim you were that you didn’t see the softening glances of the people around the room, how Namjoon looked down and smiled, letting his dimples show, how Hoseok’s sister smiled at their father and how Jimin and Tae laughed silently. Hoseok was looking at you as if it was his first time seeing you, his eyes never deviating from the little portion of your face he could see and nearly not daring to breath.

“No one is tearing you two apart, Y/N. Our top priority is the wellbeing of the boys and, even if we didn’t care about you, which we do, we would never do something that could make them unhappy,” said the older man, allowing your lungs to release the air they were holding. You relaxed against Hoseok, finally dropping your head on his shoulder. The room then broke into soft conversations, Bang PDnim talking to Hoseok’s parents, the boys unknowingly giving you guys your space. Since you were looking out of a huge window to the side, you didn’t see the look in Hoseok’s eyes as he held you closer to him and kissed the crown of your head.

Tag list: @obsessoverthesmallthings247 @threedecadesofawkward @mabel-k3 @tremendousminyoongi @justignoremepleaz @demonic-meatball @hadaises @littlestsweetpea28 @rjsmochii @take-u-2-an0ther-w0r1d @gali-005 @salty-for-suga @indicisive-af @nomimits7 @lysjeon @raisatarannum1234 @purplelady85 @threedecadesofawkward @valentynxmgc @acopenhagenarmy @ephyra1230 @minluvly @trashandshook @brinascorpio @trixiethebear @hobi-love @geekgirl41402 @annywaa

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chaoticallysapphic · 4 years

Text

the great divide part two

summary: Who knew that eight words would be your undoing. If you had known then what you know now you wouldn't have signed up for Suyin's dance troupe, you probably would have left Zaofu just to be safe. But you didn't and fate had branded you with a path that chained you to someone who would break your heart.

a/n: toxic level has decreased a bit, sort of. Thank you @medeliadracon for beta reading this!

word count: 7k

“For now”

turned into two and a half years. You had slipped up a few times causing Kuvira to punish you by leaving you alone for the night and each time you did you became more cautious with your actions.

One time a young man around your age had started to flirt with you while you handed out supplies, you tried to politely brush him off but he didn’t seem to get the message so he kept persisting until finally Bolin intervened and said Kuvira needed you to grab more crates from the train.

Another time you had blown up on Baatar when he tried to kiss Kuvira in front of everyone, she wasn’t much for public displays and you knew she would have stopped him if you hadn’t but your fuse was short that day and you paid the price. After that first night of celebration, Bolin and Varrick expected you to join them at the next town but you politely declined and even left earlier than Kuvira did. It felt like there were too many ways to mess up and you grew anxious about all the ways you may upset her.

Varrick took back his remark about you being fun, which hurt a little bit, and after a few times Bolin gave up on asking. You still missed dancing and that night reignited the passion you had for it so on days spent travelling you’d practice either in your room or in the gym, depending on how many people were already in there.

You hadn’t mentioned your desire to pick up classes again once you got back to Zaofu. A part of you was worried that she’d get angry about it and punish you once more so you decided to wait until you were married, she wouldn’t be able to hold him over your head like that anymore.

On days like today where the need to talk about work has come to a short lull and therefore Baatar fills it by talking to your soulmate, you have to remind yourself that one day you’ll get to hold her hand in front of everyone and proclaim she’s yours. You try to bury your nose in a book about chi blocking (you picked it up in the previous town and it was pretty fascinating) to distract yourself and for a few chapters it works, but when Baatar and Kuvira enter her office alone, the words on the paper become a jumbled mess and you can’t take sitting nearby as you envision what they may be doing.

You doubt she’d do something salacious with him during the daytime where someone could walk in, but you also didn’t think she’d sleep with him at all and look how that went. You slam the book down on the coffee table, effectively scaring Bolin awake who had fallen asleep on the couch across from you, and storm off to the gym.

You weren’t much for combat of any kind but suddenly you felt like hitting something, dancing wouldn’t do. So you changed into a pair of sweatpants and a white tank top and walked over to where there were rolls of bandages meant for your knuckles.

You begin punching at the punching bag hooked up to the ceiling of the train, it’s a bit pathetic seeing as you can’t even seem to make the bag move a little bit but you keep going, keep pouring all of your stress and heartache into each punch.

“Wow,” comes a voice from behind you, you look over your shoulder and see Bolin leaning against the doorway with his arms crossed over his chest. “What's pissed you off?” You shrug and hit two more times at the bag, your sweating and you’ve only been doing this for a few minutes, the muscles you had were meant for elegant strides, not uppercuts.

“Just woke up on the wrong side of the bed I guess.” You lie through your teeth and you know he can tell, so to try and distract him you ask “will you spar with me? Maybe teach me a thing or two about holding my own?” He stays quiet for a minute as he looks at you, as if trying to see how you're doing, you try your best to shove everything rising within you down. “Well?”

“Okay, I guess I should probably make sure I’m not rusty in case we get attacked or something.” He takes his jacket off then wraps his knuckles in the bandages. You spread your legs until they are aligned with your shoulders and hold up your fists. Bolin is good, far better than you which isn’t a surprise seeing as he’s fought numerous battles whilst all you’ve done is read and dance throughout your whole life.

In Zaofu it was common to join the guard, especially for your young adult years but you’d opted out of it since you were more of a pacifist and therefore didn’t want to enter an altercation with someone if the job demanded such. You feel stupid now for not taking that opportunity as you narrowly dodge Bolin’s fists, you land a decent punch on him after a couple of minutes that temporarily stuns him.

You punch again but he grabs your wrist and pushes you back, you stumble, and trip over your feet. Falling onto the wrestling mat with a thud, Bolin, who was still holding your wrist falls on top of you. He pulls away but is still on top of you as he worriedly exclaims “Oh no, I didn’t hurt you did I?”

You groan due to his weight on top of yours but otherwise, you're fine, the mat is soft enough that it cushioned your blow. “I’m fine but can you get off of me, please? It’s kinda hard to breathe.” Bolin’s eyes widen and he immediately rolls off of you, opting to lay beside you on the mat as you catch your breath.

“Aren’t you a dancer, don’t you have to have a really good sense of balance for that?” He questions and you frown, you're not officially a dancer and you had only taken about two months' worth of lessons before leaving with Kuvira.

Your practices just consisted of you doing the handful of things you learned in the dance studio or saw someone do at one of the many town celebrations. “Not really, I just do it for fun.”

“Oh, you just seem so good at it that I assumed,” he sits up but doesn’t move to stand so you follow and cross your legs over one another.

“I took some lessons back in Zaofu before I left with Kuvira, but I’d only been doing it for a couple of months” you look down at your lap as you remember the freeing feeling of flying in the air as the petals catapulted you to the next. Or how it felt to gracefully spin in the air with your wire. You’d wanted to learn more about aerial moves from Suyin who seemed to be a professional at it and even planned to ask her for private lessons after the performance.

“I think that still makes you one if you want it to be” he offers, you throw him a grateful smile before looking back at your legs, you pick at the frayed hem of your sweats and sigh. “Are you okay, y/n?”

Your head shoots up to look at him, your brows pinch together in confusion “what do you mean?”

“You just seem really sad all the time, or angry. Zhu Li said you haven’t been eating much either.” That’s because you lose your appetite anytime Baatar is so much as in the same room as you and you all tend to take your meals together. If he so much as smiles you imagine throwing your butter knife at him.

Now that you think about it, your thoughts weren’t always this violent and loud, you’d never let someone's mere existence bother you before even when you got made fun of at school when you were younger. But now you want to rip things apart whilst crying, you want to be destructive especially towards him.

You must be silent for too long because Bolin places a hand on your knee which causes you to look up at him, it's then you feel how wet your cheeks are. You bring a hand up to your face and once you pull it away you see the telltale sign of wetness, of tears. “‘m just lonely is all,” you say, and it’s not a lie.

You think about telling Bolin, maybe he’d be decent at keeping a secret but you know it's too dangerous. You don’t want to think about what’ll happen if Kuvira’s grand plan is compromised by you and the young earth bender.

He pulls you into a hug and suddenly the floodgates burst open, you grip onto the back of his shirt to keep you grounded as you let out all the pent up rage and sadness within you. You think about the last time she didn’t show up to your room, how you stayed up all night in hopes that she just got caught up with some important documents. How when the sun rose and she still hadn’t snuck in, you felt so hollow and alone.

You grew up on the story of your parents and their perfect meeting, how they clicked instantly, and got married a year later. Your dad still bought her flowers every Friday and your mom still laughed at his awful jokes. You’d hoped for that kind of love when you were little, expected it even. When you met Kuvira for the first time a rush went through your body after she spoke and you just became so entranced by her every movement. She filled all your senses and when she wasn’t around she was all you could think about.

You’d kept it all for her, you never dated growing up or even kissed someone. You knew your soulmate probably wouldn’t do the same but you didn’t care. You just wanted all your firsts to be with them. You love her so much, you’d do anything for her and it's apparent in your current suffering.

Slowly as the days roll on telling yourself it will have been worth it when you’re married lost its comfort. You don’t know how long you cry into Bolin’s shoulder but you do know by the time you’ve calmed down you feel so exhausted that you may just fall asleep on this mat. Slowly, you pull away from him, there’s a large wet stain on his undershirt but he doesn’t seem to mind.

“We’re all here for you, y/n. You’re not alone.” He places a hand on your shoulder and gives it a comforting squeeze, you offer him a thankful smile as you pull yourself up onto your feet. “Thank you, it means a lot.”

When you're in your room you pull your hair out of its updo and fall onto your bed, you're so exhausted that you decide to just sleep through dinner despite the grumble of your stomach.

You’re awoken a few hours later, you assume, the sun is down and it’s almost pitch black in your room if not for the glow of the moon through your window. Kuvira softly closes your door behind her as she climbs into bed. “Bolin said you seemed too tired for dinner, are you sick?” She wraps an arm around your waist and pulls you close. You wordlessly shake your head and snuggle into her side.

Kuvira runs a hand through your hair, slowly you feel a bit better about earlier as you begin to relax. “I have to tell you something,” she says softly, almost hesitantly. She’s never hesitant, always sure in her words and actions. You pull away, suddenly nervous at what she has to say. She’s not pregnant, right? Because you can’t raise his child, you just can’t. “Baatar proposed.”

Your heart stops, “you said no, right?” The silence that follows is enough and suddenly you don’t want to even be in the same train car as her. You sit up and press yourself against the wall since she’s caging you in. “ ‘Vira… no.” She sits up and grabs your face between her hands, you try to pull away but she’s persistent and looks into your eyes pleadingly.

“I’m not going to marry him, y/n. It’s just to placate him until we win and we’re so close to winning. Only a couple more months, I swear” her words do little to mend your cracking heart, suddenly you don’t think she’s telling the truth. She only said this would go on for a while, she never said she’d sleep with him and accept a stupid proposal.

“I can’t keep watching this… It’s killing me” you whimper, she pulls you into her arms, you don’t want her to touch you but you also don’t have the energy to push her away.

“I love you” she begins to pepper your face with delicate kisses, each kiss is accentuated with those three words and soon enough she’s laying you back down as she climbs on top of you. “I only love you, I hate him, I swear.” She pulls you into a soft kiss that conveys her feelings, you slowly kiss her back, your hand cupping her cheek. Slowly she makes you feel less lonely as she pulls your shirt off.

That night she tries to remind you of how much she truly loves you, and it temporarily works.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“For now,” turns into three years. After Kuvira’s announcement in Republic City, which wasn’t all too well received, you guys head towards Zaofu. Kuvira had kept you from seeing Suyin in the city, claiming she needed time to calm down before a reunion to which you agreed.

She eases up on you after the proposal, she hasn’t ‘punished’ you since despite accidentally upsetting her quite a few times in public. There’s still that fear of her doing it again, but she always crawls into your bed and pulls you into her arms. She doesn’t wear the ring around you.

After the announcement you just kept staring at her hand as you tried to fight the tears threatening to spill. A few days after catching you staring, she tells Baatar it was best if she kept it tucked safely away so it didn’t get damaged or accidentally used for bending, but her real reasoning was to help ease your pain.

Kuvira even spends more time with you during the day, much to Baatar’s chagrin. If she wasn’t in some important military meeting she was usually seen reading with you. After a bit of psyching yourself up, you ask her if she wants to practice dancing with you, she looks up from her book and into your eyes before slowly nodding.

Bolin ends up teaching you how to properly fight someone with your fists and as the months go on you improve greatly. One day you ask him if you can try something on him, he’s a bit apprehensive but relents, before he can even ask what you're going to do you close your fist except for your pointer and middle finger before hitting him in his chi.

Bolin’s eyes widen at your action, he tries to bend the metal of a dumbbell but nothing happens, “w-why would you do that? How did you do that!” Shock races through you as he keeps trying to bend, spirits you just chi blocked someone.

“I’m sorry! Some old lady gave me this book about it in a town, she said her grandson was an equalist and she wanted it out of her house. But look, I can block people’s chi’s in a fight!” You bite your lip to keep from grinning as Bolin looks at you as if you're insane.

“You're a bender, why would you need that?!”

“What if I’m up against a powerful bender? I need to have something to even the playing field.” You bring your hands to your mouth to hide the pride you feel for yourself. “I won’t ever use it on you again; I just wanted to see if it’d work. I’m sorry.”

A few days later you're sitting in Kuvira’s office with Baatar and Kuvira whilst they discuss how to get Zaofu on their side. Baatar had called for Bolin some time ago, their plan was for you and Bolin to convince Suyin to sign the papers. You felt a bit off about it but the night before Kuvira assured you that it was just because they were still bitter about her dating Baatar, which had caused you to flinch. She knew you didn’t like to talk about him, especially after the proposal.

The morning after she told you, you had stayed in your room for most of the day and when you snuck out to the gym around midday Bolin had entered and told you about their announcement over breakfast. If he noticed you hitting harder than usual, he didn’t mention it.

“Am I in trouble?” Bolin asks cautiously as he eyes the three of you, you send him a comforting smile which has Baatar quietly scoffing from the other side of the couch. The guy was a real dick and once Kuvira left him you think you might have a word or two with him.

“No. In fact, I have good news. We want you to be part of our inner circle,” she gives him one of those smiles that only you, and maybe Baatar, know is fake. Bolin looks like he’s practically vibrating with joy as he shouts out “inner circle? No way! Yes!” He begins to fist pump the air before realizing who he’s in front of, which makes you snort (Baatar sends a glare your way at that), and composes himself, “That is a great honor… What does it mean exactly?”

“It means you’ve proven your worth,” she takes a step back and gestures to the map that has one large piece missing from it, Zaofu, “we’re so close to uniting the empire but Su has some resentment towards me and Baatar that might cloud her judgment and stop her from making a wise decision. We believe you and y/n can help her see clearly.”

“I can do that!” He says eagerly, “by the time we finish telling her all the great things we’ve done, she’ll be begging to join.”

“Good, because we’re here.” She bends the blinds up, you look out the window in front of you and notice all the troops waiting outside… She didn’t tell you about this. “Vir-Kuvira, what is this?” You quickly correct yourself. Bolin adds to your question “aren’t all these troops going to send the wrong message.”

“The army is here to project strength. You’re here to present-” she looks over at you as she continues, her gaze hardening in a warning, “-peace.” You sink into the cushions of the couch and soon she turns away from you to look at her map once more, Bolin looks uneasy and suddenly you feel unsure.

Kuvira kept you out of some of the meetings in the past because she said it was boring nonsense that consisted of military talk which you knew nothing about so you always shrugged it off. Now you're worried those meetings weren’t nonsense at all. You didn’t even know the army was this big.

You thought your return to Zaofu would be filled with excitement and joy, you’d listed off all the things you wanted to do in your head, the top one being seeing your parents again. But the tram ride through the city has your stomach twisted in knots.

When the doors open and you all walk off the people of the city, people you’ve known your whole life, give you looks of disgust. You look down at the floor, unable to stomach the glares they send your way as you walk into the Beifong estate.

You all stop in front of a set of double doors, you’ve never been in this house before, it's massive and honestly seems like a sprawling palace. When the doors open you aren’t met with open arms, the entire Beifong family (sans Baatar) stares at you four with disapproving glares.

There’s a hint of surprise in Suyin’s eyes when they land on you and suddenly you want to be enclosed in the metal flower like all those years ago. Bolin rushes over to Opal, trying to hug her but she turns her back on him and crosses her arms.

That feeling in your stomach twists and tightens, you don’t think you can get through the speech you had planned now, it feels like there’s a fist-sized ball stuck in your throat.

“No, you’ve chosen your side,” she says. Kuvira looks over at you, urging you forward and so you hesitantly walk to stand beside Bolin. “Sides? There shouldn’t be any sides. I know, why don’t we all stand in a circle, huh, maybe hold hands?” You want to slap his arm but you don’t, it doesn’t seem like the right time.

Before you can say anything, Suyin looks at Kuvira and says “I’m not giving up Zaofu. I don’t care if you brought your entire army.”

Kuvira lifts her hand and speaks in an earnest tone “Su, I didn’t bring my army to threaten you. I wanted to show you all that your son and I have accomplished.” You bite your tongue, wanting to blurt out that Baatar’s hardly done a thing, and it takes all your might to keep those bitter words down but you manage, somehow.

“You must realize what your doing goes against everything your father and I tried to teach you,” Suyin seems so disappointed in him, you wonder if your mother is disappointed in you too.

“Son, you belong here.” Baatar Sr. says.

“Why?” Baatar forces out between gritted teeth, “so that I can go on living in your shadow?” Baatar Sr. 's eyes widen in shock and he looks so hurt, Suyin replies for her husband and says “don’t say that, can’t you see she’s brainwashed you?”

Kuvira guffaws at that, it’s true, she has brainwashed and manipulated him, twisted him around her finger with her husky voice and promise of love and devotion. “Ha, I didn’t brainwash him. I set him free. And now he’s accomplished more with me than he ever could have with you.” Towards the end, Kuvira’s eyes set into a glare and you decide to jump into action.

“Obviously there is a lot of personal conflict between you all, but we should be talking about the good of Zaofu and how we can help this great city,” you say, Suyin looks at you pitifully which has you feeling uneasy.

“Whatever she’s told you y/n, it’s a lie. I know you, you're too sweet and innocent to be siding with her if you knew the whole truth,” her tone is sympathetic, you furrow your brows and look over at Kuvira who looks to be struggling to keep her composure. “I would never lie to her or to Bolin.”

“You know what I think we need to do? Focus on the future and the future is bright. Let me tell you. I’ve seen it, yeah I saw it last month. We went to this town that had nothing. Most of the people there had never even seen a satomobile before but now they have two satomobiles, running water, and a magnet train that goes right through their town. I mean how awesome is that?”

You place a hand on Bolin’s shoulder, trying to silently communicate with him to shut up, “they also have plenty of food now, most towns we go to are on the brink of collapse.”

Opal crosses her arms and glares at the two of you, “they might have been happy when you first arrived but I’ve seen what happens after you leave. Citizens are forced to work as slave labor. Dissenters are sent off to who knows where.” You drop your hand off of Bolins shoulder and take a step back, you guys had actually never revisited any of the towns you helped. You chalked it up to being busy.

“-But I am giving you the 100% Bolin guarantee that we’re making the earth empire a better place to live!” Bolin says. You were too lost in your thoughts to hear the first half of his speech, there has to be a time someone at least mentioned what happens to the past towns and villages you helped. But your mind comes up short.

Suyin takes a step forward and says with anger laced in her tone “I can’t believe you brought Bolin and y/n here to try and sway us.” She keeps walking until she’s directly in front of Kuvira. “Leave. Zaofu will never accept you as their leader.”

“Then you leave me no choice. You have twenty-four hours to agree to join the earth empire or we take the city by force.” No, that was never part of the plan, it can’t be part of the plan. Your family is here, your mother is part of the guard. Suyin kicks you guys out of her estate, as you begin to exit through the front door, Suyin calls after you.

“Y/n, your parents are worried sick.” You look over your shoulder at her, she gives her a pleading look but before you can even comprehend a reply you hear Kuvira call out in a bored tone, “C’mon y/n. We’re leaving.”

You rush after her, leaving Suyin and your family behind. You take the tram out of the city then reboard your train that takes you to the center of the camp where Kuvira’s tent is. Throughout the ride, Bolin keeps giving you nervous glances that you try to ignore. Once in Kuvira’s tent she goes to sit behind her desk, you lean against said desk as Baatar stands a few feet from you and Bolin stands in front of Kuvira.

Bolin decides to break the silence “I mean, you’re not really going to attack Zaofu… are you?”

“When people don’t cooperate we must find other ways of convincing them to join” she replies smoothly. Your heart drops, she knows how much your family means to you, how much you still love Zaofu. She can’t really be willing to march through there and destroy everything you love.

“Other ways? How many times have we used these other ways in the past?” Bolin tilts his head in confusion. Your knuckles turn white as you grasp at the metal desk behind you while the struggle to keep quiet becomes harder by the second. Suddenly the idea of her punishing you tonight doesn’t seem so bad if you can somehow get her to remain peaceful.

Kuvira slowly stands from her desk, “It’s not for you to worry about.” Bolin fiddles with his fingers as he tries to figure out what to say next, you know you should intervene, the words are on the tip of your tongue but it feels as if someone’s sewn your mouth shut.

“So… what happens to all those towns and villages after we leave? I just realized I’ve never really gone back and checked on them.” Kuvira makes her way around the table until she’s in front of him.

“Those people are my loyal subjects and they contribute to the empire however I see fit.-” You push yourself off the table but Baatar grips your shoulder and pushes you back against it to keep you from getting involved, “What do you think you're doing?” you spit out, Kuvira ignores the spat going on behind her as she continues “-Now that you're in the inner circle, you're going to have to learn some hard truths.”

“You don’t need to be getting involved” Baatar replies smoothly, Bolin seems caught up in trying to figure out how to properly word his response as you glare at your soulmate's fiancee. “You touch me again and I’ll rip your arm off.”

Baatar laughs, “I’d like to see you try.” Suddenly all the reasonings you ever had to keep your anger at bay slowly start to diminish. “You won’t be laughing when I’ve finally had my piece of you.” He must not see you as a threat, he just shrugs you off and turns to proudly watch Kuvira.

“Maybe I’m not really an inner circle kind of guy. Or- Or we don’t take over Zaofu we could just let them be on their own, then yay the empires united! Congratulations to us.” Kuvira towers over Bolin as she threateningly stalks after him, her fists clenched.

“ I didn’t know your personal feelings for Opal were stronger than your loyalty to me.” He leans against the table behind him as she stares him down, her behavior is so familiar, you furrow your brows. Is that what she looks like when she’s angry at you? “- Zaofu will join us. The only thing I’m second-guessing is the decision to bring you along. Maybe you need to spend some time in a reeducation camp.”

“I thought that’s where we sent people to learn new trade skills…” He trails off, eyeing the two of them, his eyes even drift to you for a second, to see if you're in on this but your expression must give your surprise away because the tiniest bit of him relaxes. “Hard truths, Bolin," Baatar drones.

“Your loyalty seems to be wavering.” Kuvira crosses her arms across her chest as she stares him down, Bolin shakes his head thrice. “No, no I’m totally on your side, completely 100% loyal.” He salutes her. It seems to do the job because she simply glares at him for a minute before swiftly turning away. “Everyone, leave.”

Bolin practically sprints out of there and Baatar slowly follows after, you take your time and at the entrance of her tent you turn around to stare at your soulmate. “Vira-”

“I said leave!” She shouts, her hands smacking down against her desk as she glares at you. You stumble out, surprised by her outburst, before making your way back to the train to hide away in your room once more. As you pass a large tent pitched near the train's entrance someone grabs onto your shoulder and roughly yanks you to the side so you're both hidden from view. Before you can yell at whoever touched you, Bolin comes into sight.

“We need to leave, now” he claims, he grabs your hand and tugs you towards the ladder that leads to the roof of the train. “Guards are stationed at Varrick's door, we need to break in from abo-.”

“Bolin I can’t leave” you whisper, he whips around to look at you. “Are you delusional, did you not see what I saw in there?”

“You don’t understand, I know what happened was wrong but…” tears collect at the corners of your eyes and you feel that familiar feeling of fear claw up your throat. “She’s my soulmate, Bolin.”

His eyes widen and he drops your hand as if suddenly you might be diseased, it hurts to see the look he’s giving you right now. “But Baa-”

“She’s using him, she has for years. Why do you think I’m always so sad? If I leave her she’ll never forgive me.”

“She’s going to march on Zaofu and probably destroy it. We can get in there and warn them about how strong her forces are,” he tries to reason with you. “y/n the Kuvira you fell in love with is gone.” You look away, a part of you knows that with all this power she’s collected she’s slowly lost pieces of herself. She’s always been a bit controlling and aggressive but it’s gotten worse over the years.

“I think I can bring her back, You need to head to Zaofu and try to figure out some kind of peaceful solution with Suyin and I’ll try to calm Vira down.” You know you're running out of time, “go Bolin, you need to hurry.” You push him towards the ladder that leads to the roof of the train, before he climbs up he pulls you into a quick, bone-crushing hug.

“Be safe,” he says softly, giving you one last tight squeeze before climbing up and out of view. You look over your shoulder, eyes drifting to Kuvira’s tent, some of her soldiers are currently erecting tents nearby for your group, much smaller ones but you didn’t mind.

“You can do this” you whisper to yourself, trying to psych yourself up before marching back towards the massive octagon-shaped tent.

Once at the flap you gently push the fabric apart so you can step inside, Kuvira is sitting at her desk, reading over a pile of papers when she notices your presence. “I thought I told you to leave.”

“I wanted to talk to you, about Zaofu.” You try to keep your voice from shaking as you walk closer until you're standing in front of your desk. “My parents are in there, Vira.”

“They won’t get hurt, you said they're smart so they should know to stay out of my soldiers' way,” she sets the paper in her hand down so she can look up at you, giving you her undivided attention. “We need Zaofu, y/n.”

“What if we worked out a deal where they remain independent but offer to give us a certain amount of supplies a year in exchange for peace. It could work.” She’s silent, hope festers in your heart as she mulls over your idea.

“It would make us seem weak to the rest of the world,” she counters and you sigh. You can’t give up, besides the longer you keep her talking the less chance there is of her going to check on Varrick.

“It would make us seem merciful and benevolent. You told me our image is incredibly important and it’s in a delicate balance right now. Marching on them will make us be seen as no better than the earth queen, the other nations will hate us.”

Kuvira pushes her chair back and stands, her hands rest on the desk so she can lean closer to you until your faces are only a few inches apart. “If I think about it, will that make you happy?” Her voice is husky and smooth, she’s speaking softly to you and that pesky part of you that’s practically entranced by her is trying to rip through your focus.

“Yes, it will” you whisper back, she leans forward to bring you into a quick kiss filled with passion and love. You're surprised by her actions, technically anyone could walk right in but you know most people would knock on the wooden post outside before entering. It fills you with hope that she’s willing to kiss you in broad daylight.

Kuvira pulls away and goes to sit back in her desk chair, you're frozen in mild shock which must be evident in your demeanor because she looks up at you with a smirk. “I’ve told everyone for safety reasons I’ll be staying in your tent, expect me there tonight.”

Before you can answer, there’s a knock from outside and Kuvira waits a moment before saying in her usual commanding voice, “come in!” A soldier walks in, as he was trained he immediately bows upon entering before walking closer until he’s a few feet from her desk. You try to compose yourself so it’s not obvious what just happened, your cheeks feel warm.

“What is it?” She quirks a brow and looks up at him, her demeanor towards her soldiers is much calmer and you’ve seen her joke with them a couple of times. One night you asked her why, it just didn’t seem like her to which she replied “if, for whatever reason, I can’t protect myself, my life is in their hands. Why would I not be nice to them?”

“Baatar asked me to inform you that Avatar Korra is here,” his back is ramrod straight and his eyes are trained above her, as all soldiers are taught. Kuvira stands from her chair once more and rounds the desk, walking over to him, “take me to her.” You follow after them a few paces behind, your hands held together behind your back to appear professional and strong, as Kuvira taught you.

That smug bastard Baatar is standing beside the Avatar, you had caught a glimpse of her once in Zaofu but she looks so different now with her cropped hair and earth kingdom clothes. ”The Avatar is here to see you,” he says, glancing at her before his eyes shift back to your soulmate.

“Korra, it’s such an honor to see you again. The last I heard you were still healing in the south pole.” Baatar notices you beside Kuvira and gives you a hardened glare, one of these days you were going to break down his ego for all the pain he’s unknowingly caused you, and all the hatred he has towards you despite not knowing what you do to his fiancee whilst he sleeps.

“Well, I’m feeling much better now.”

“That’s wonderful news.” No, it's not. Not for Kuvira’s plans at least. But maybe Korra can help you convince Kuvira to back down and save Zaofu from the impending invasion.

“I’m here to ask you to back down. Please, take your army and leave.” Kuvira’s brows pull together just a fraction, you know her and you know that means the Avatar’s request didn’t work.

“I think we both know that’s not going to happen,” she says. Korra’s face sets into a firm glare as she stares her down. “I can’t let you take Zaofu.”

“Look-” Kuvira gestures to the camp around them, “- I was tasked with bringing stability to the earth kingdom. Zaofu is the last holdout. Why should I treat it any differently than any other state?” She clasps her hands together behind her back once more. Treat it differently because it’s home, because there are people we love inside! The voice inside your head shouts.

“What you're doing isn’t right,” Korra’s face softens as she tries to get through to her. This isn’t working, if anything it’s just giving Kuvira more ammunition to attack, you want to tell the Avatar to shut up and leave.

“I understand you're just trying to do Su a favor, but you can’t come to me as I’m on the verge of reuniting my nation and tell me to stop. The world was descending into chaos while you were gone,” Korra looks down when Kuvira mentions her absence, looking solemn and remorseful, “and in order to fix it, I had to make some tough decisions.” Yeah like, get engaged to Baatar…

“I know what that’s like. I’ve had plenty of people mad at me about decisions I’ve made,” Korra looks back up at Kuvira.

She takes a couple of steps over to the Avatar, “exactly. Korra if you really want to help,” she places a hand on Korra’s shoulder, “go back to Su and try to talk some sense into her. Let’s call a temporary truce. I won’t make any moves until you talk to her and get back to me.”

“Maybe that will be for the best…” Korra leaves shortly after, rushing to the metal city. Once she’s out of earshot Kuvira glances at Baatar and demands “prepare us for the worst, and go check on Bolin.”

Your eyes widen and you look between the two of them before speaking up, “I can go find him, we usually spar around this time anyways.” You try to keep calm, Baatar scoffs at your offer “now is not the time for you to run off into some closet for a quick stress relief.”

You gasp and take a step closer to him, “Bolin is my friend and nothing more. For you to accuse me of sleeping with someone who is happily in a relationship, with your little sister no less, is disrespectful and wrong.” Kuvira steps between you guys, glaring at you both.

“Baatar, go find Bolin, y/n I need help with some plans in my tent.” Her tone is icy cold and your heart drops, does she believe Baatar? You anxiously follow after her and once you're inside the large tent once more she heads over to a large table with maps scattered across it. Slowly you walk over until you're standing beside her, your gaze locked on the side of her head.

“You don’t believe him… do you?” your voice is small and she places her hand flat across the table as she stares at the Gaoling province on the map. “Vira…”

“I don’t think you would, but I wouldn’t put it past him to have feelings for you and I know you can be quite vulnerable at times.” She finally looks up at you with an inquisitive stare, “has he ever tried anything?”

“No, Vira, he loves Opal just as I love you. If he had ever tried something I would have told you by now, I promise.” You place your hand atop hers and give it a gentle squeeze. She flips her hand so her palm is facing upwards and threads her fingers with your own.

“Good, I don’t think I could keep myself from fighting him if something had happened between the two of you,” she says possessively while your stomach drops at her insinuation. She pulls you into another quick kiss and your mind is clouded with confusion at all of her affection today; it's foreign and strange. “We only have a few steps left before this great nation is stable due to our hard work. Only a little while longer until I can propose to you.”

“I love you,” you say softly, one of her rare genuine smiles appears on her face as she gives your hand a gentle squeeze before pulling away from you. “I love you too.”

Maybe there’s still a chance, after all, Bolin should be in Zaofu by now.

#kuvira #the great uniter #the great divide #kuvira x reader #kuvira/reader #lok #lok fanfic #legend of korra #bolin #varrick #opal #suyin #baatar jr

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heavcnslyre · 3 years

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ricky bowen x reader second series!! part six

— (continuation) starstruck au!

first series | series masterlist, part one, part two, part three, part four, part five, part six, part seven, part eight, part nine, part ten

IN WHICH you hear from ricky after not hearing from him in a couple days. then, you plan a surprise trip.

WARNINGS swearing

NOTES this is kinda written poorly but whatever!!!! enjoy!!

text dividers from @writeyourmindaway !!

( tags: @hesvoid34 @omgdani17 )

lowercase intended.

you sighed and set your phone down after sending the last message to red. long distance was ass. if ricky was going through something, you wanted to be there for him, yet there was nothing you could do until he was feeling up to reaching out. all you wanted was to be able to help.

you didn’t hear from ricky until the next night, at close to one in the morning. you were almost asleep when your phone started to buzz. you grabbed it immediately— you had it set up so you would only get notifications from a few people while your phone was on do not disturb, and ricky was one of them.

“hello?” you answered the call tiredly.

“shit, time zones,” ricky groaned. “i completely forgot. i didn’t mean to wake you.”

“no, don’t worry. i wasn’t asleep,” you lied. “how are you?”

“i’m okay,” he said softly. “i’m sorry i disappeared i didn’t mean to. it’s just, some family stuff is happening and my heads all over the place.”

you sighed. “don’t apologize for having feelings. we all feel the need to disappear sometimes. is everything okay?”

“not really. my parents... they’re divorcing,” ricky seemed to whisper the last part. you frowned and your heart ached at how vulnerable he sounded.

“ricky, i’m so sorry,” you said. “what’s going to happen now?”

“well, they’re both moving out,” he said. “i’ve been paying for this house for the most part anyways and now that i’m 18 now, they decided they both would get their own places. leave me and red here.”

“oh,” you said. “arent they your managers? how will that change?”

“they both quit. but they helped me find someone new first, which was nice i guess.”

“a good thing is now your relationship with your parents would be strictly as your parents. but obviously, this is a really tough situation. i wish there was a way i could help.”

ricky hummed. “hearing your voice is helping. i just wish you were still coming for the summer. i just want to hug you.”

“i know. i’m sorry, i wish i could be there for you more than anything.”

“i love you so much,” he said.

“i love you too.”

you talked for close to an hour, just catching up, before you realized that it was a school night and past two in the morning. you told him goodnight and he promised to talk to you tomorrow. before you went to sleep, though, you texted ashlyn.

you woke up the next morning with a text from ricky thanking you for comforting him last night. you smiled and sent him back heart emojis. you got ready for school and after you arrived, you told ashlyn you’d text her later and she sent you back a very ashlyn-like string of emojis.

school was as it always was— everyone either watched you in the hallway or asked you questions about ricky. today’s questions were; why hasn’t ricky been active on social media, what is he currently up to, and what was his phone number. obviously, you didn’t answer any of the questions. fans of people seemed to want to know everything about them, no matter how much of an invasion of privacy it was.

when you got home, you asked ashlyn if you could facetime her instead. she answered by facetiming you.

“hey!” she said happily.

“hi ash!” you replied. “how have you been?”

“great! but tell me your plans! how are you gonna surprise ricky?”

you laughed at her eagerness. “okay. so i assume you know what’s happening with him currently?”

“red talked to me earlier today. i promise you i only found out after you did.”

“don’t worry,” you said. “but you also know that grandmas boyfriend is sick?”

“yeah. i heard,” she said. “i’m assuming your family isn’t going out there this summer either?”

“no we aren’t. and ricky didn’t take that well, and i can’t imagine this situation with his parents makes it any easier,” you said. “so, i was thinking, that when you go over spring break, i’ll just go with you!”

“yes!” she exclaimed. “absolutely! do you think your parents would be okay with it?”

“i’d have to really convince them, but i have money saved up. and they adore ricky, and knowing you were there would make them more comfortable as well.”

“talk to them as soon as possible and let me know what they say,” ashlyn said. you nodded.

“of course. i obviously want to surprise ricky, though. i’ll probably text red and let him know.”

“ooh we can make a groupchat!” she said. “i’ve been meaning to make one with all four of us so we can also make one with the three of us.”

“perfect! that’d be great- i’m so excited!”

ashlyn grinned. “me too!”

you made your way downstairs to where your parents were watching tv together. they both smiled at you when you approached them and your dad paused the show.

“hey hun!” your mom said. “what’s up?”

you sat on the couch across from them gently. “i wanted to talk to you guys about the possibility of me going to california over spring break.”

“okay,” your mom said. “what’s your plan?”

“well,” you started. “ricky’s been really frustrated with some family issues going on right now. and i was thinking, since we can’t go as a family over summer, i could pay for myself to go over spring break when ashlyn is there so i can surprise him.”

“that sounds like a really nice plan,” your dad said. “but is it realistic? do you have enough to go and would you be comfortable flying on your own?”

“i would be totally fine with that. and i’ve been saving up since my birthday— i would only have to pay for a flight and some things while i’m there.”

your parents looked at each other and seemed to have a conversation with their eyes. your mom turned back to you. “if this is what you want to do, you have our permission.”

“oh, thank you!” you said. “that means the world to me.”

“sure thing,” your mom said. “you’re almost 18 now, basically an adult.”

you laughed. “yeah, i guess so.”

#ricky bowen starstruck au #joshua bassett #high school musical the musical the series #hsmtmts #olivia rodrigo #ashlyn caswell #bowen #ricky #ricky bowen x reader #drivers license #hsm the series #ricky bowen #ricky bowen headcanons #ricky bowen one shots

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colesartandbooksandstuff · 4 years

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Loki: Where Mischief Lies- Mackenzi Lee

Background: I had been looking forward to this book as soon as it was announced. I loved The Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue by Mackenzi Lee and I had high hopes for her 3 marvel books. (Also note that this was before readers cancelled her multiple times and before I was aware of that). The book sat on my shelf for a hot minute and I didn’t get to it for almost 6 months from when I bought it. I hope that Loki is portrayed as truly genderqueer and pan since he is in some comics. The book is divided into smaller sections (part 1 and the much longer part 2). and that’s how I’m gonna break up the review).

Part 1: This book is confusing. The most interaction that I have with norse mythology is from the Thor movies and this is more in-depth than those were. There are a lot of long names that were thrown around. In the 90 some pages that composed part 1, some big things happened and it happened pretty fast (the plot only took place over 1-2 days) but it didn’t draw me in. There was a lot of descriptive language that fluffed up the text but wasn’t needed. It ended on a bit event but nothing that really effected any of the characters, so I’m confused on where its going to go. I don’t hate it but I’m not loving it either.

Halfway: It’s gotten a lot better. The plot has taken Loki to London and its in the past. Historical fiction is where Mackenzi Lee loves to write and you can see that. The genre turns from mythology to a murder mystery and the urgency ramps up. However, I feel like at this point all of part 1 wasn’t needed. There is potential for (and I would not be surprised if) that event tied into the mystery, but at this point it is not connected at all. Also- Loki has not touched upon him being gender fluid (he uses he/him pronouns int he book, I’m not misgendering him) or about him being pansexual. I hope that these are backed up by the plot and writing rather than “we have a gender fluid, pansexual character” but if it wasn’t announced we would have no idea.

Second half: Loki came through. Not long after the halfway point it was explicit that he was genderqueer and later on the book he kissed both a boy and a girl. I’ll take it. The plot got good, it felt like the events were going on right as you were reading them, not like they were a retelling. My major complaint is that it ended abruptly. Loki finished the task at hand (kinda) and returned home. That was it. There could be a whole series of books and while there wasn’t a cliffhanger per se, there wasn’t any resolution or falling action either. That being said I do prefer that over the climax coming too soon and having 200 pages of wrap up.

Overall: This isn’t an explicitly queer book, romance is a minor sub-plot at best. There isn’t a ton of historical even though it is historical fiction-esqe. It also doesn’t feature a lot of mythology. The mystery wasn’t hard to solve on the reader’s end. But I liked it. I liked it a lot. Its 408 pages, so its not a quick read but if you want to read a book about Loki that is very different from most of his comics and graphic novels I’d recommend it. If you like historical fiction or any of the Montague Siblings books, you’d definitely like this too. I’ll be buying the next two books in the series for sure. (Those will not be about Loki, but focusing on other marvel anti-heroes) 4/5 stars

Quotes:

“Earth is so determined to make everything that’s hard for a man doubly hard for a woman” pg 246

#loki #loki where mischief lies #mackenzi lee #marvel #book review #book reviews #queer books #LGBT books

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blackasmidnightcats · 4 years

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Book 1 Nostalgia

WARNING: This post will have spoilers to the SGE series

The first book in any series will always hold a special place in anyone's heart I think. There is just something beautiful, whether the writing was phenomenal or lacking, about the introduction to a new world and the characters that you're going to know. After reading further into the series, sometimes you just wanna go back to the start, where everything was a lot simpler.

SGE kinda falls into this feeling for me.

I don't think I'm ever going to get over the interactions between the characters (and we haven't even explored most of them) because, personally, Soman is incredibly good with how he does character intercations but the story and plot have a lot to improve on.

And now comparing TSY with TCY it's very glaring.

Soman really has a problem with his plot so much so than with his storyline. It's very repetitive and the storyline suffers from it.

After Book 1, every plot seemed to be the same case; Sophie is an important piece to the main villain, Agatha tries to fix everything, Tedros is getting more crap than needed, annoyingly unhealthy romantic relationships are explored, and the other characters do things.

The last of these examples are really the only things that varies. Everything else is almost always the same in one way or another.

The first book doesn't really follow that pattern. It's a introductory book and I wish Soman did the same vibe as it in QfG.

Though Book 1 wasn't perfect. My biggest main problem with it was how Soman handled Agatha's development from thinking herself a freak and realizing that she was just a beautiful as anyone else (and Tagatha, of course. They had a very unconvincing start) compared to the detailed and precise handling of Sophie's decent and eventual acceptance her wickedness.

I said it once and I'll say it again: I miss vengeful, spited Sophie. Who made the School for Good suffer because Tedros didn't keep his promise and her very impressive Talent to summon Evil creatures at will to do her bidding.

This was the Sophie that I expected more from in the later books but might never get again. With the way that the OTK cover portrays her as the Lion, whether that would be a thing or not, it's clear that Soman wants the readers to look at Sophie in a better light and not as the anti-hero that she is but I could be wrong.

In Book 1, Sophie was incredibly selfish to the point that she wouldn't do anything for others even those that she should care about (i.e. Tedros in the Trial) and in the end, she had to pay for the selfishness by seeing just how Evil she could become and be seen as the witch that she was. Her development from Pink Princess to Witch of Woods Beyond was believable; her ambitiousness combined with her selfishness was what made her gain everything through manipulation and wickedness but it couldn't be hidden for long. Once everyone, including herself, saw what lied underneath her exterior, she lost everything and because of the things that she chooses to do, she naturally hurt and attacked the people that wronged her just as Evil does.

It was caused by a failed romantic pursuit, yes, but unlike the other later romantic relations that she had, the one in Book 1 focused more on the outcome for her character development than in the relationship itself. Honestly her relationships with Rafal, and Rhian, and maybe now Japeth, idk, make absolutely no sense with the importance that the story puts on it because these relationships didn't help further Sophie's character development. It stunted her really.

Now compare this to Agatha.

I think everyone and their cats agree that we all miss witchy Agatha in book 1 and I hope we write more of her in our fanfics like that since Soman won't do it. The thing is, with Agatha, unlike Sophie, whether she is written as a straight-up hero or as a sort of anti-villain with her portrayal as the Snake in the OTK cover, it won't be that far fetched. I don't know if Soman intended this or not but it's pretty frickin impressive with how he managed to make Agatha a pretty versatile character.

Book 1 did not to good with how she went from Graveyard Girl to Fairy Tale Princess. At most, we saw her heroic characteristics but Soman didn't put much effort with making it believable and we were left to our own imaginations with how she could have believably developed and grown into herself. It should have taken more than one chapter to make us believe that Agatha suddenly grew confident with herself and her own brand of beauty and how her relationship with Tedros should have started.

But because of the fact that she's now comfortable as both being a little different and unique in her own way but is still guided by the values of Good and holds it dear to her soul as well as her loyalty to those she loves, she can do great with the best of both worlds.

Agatha hasn't stopped growing since book 1 and I think that reason for that is because Soman knows that he has to square up whenever he writes her. Whether she's developing on her own or with others, she's always learning new values and finding ways to express them in the way that she's comfortable with.

Soman does express that he loves writing in Sophie's POV the most, but it can be a double edged sword if not careful. And I think Soman hasn't been careful.

Now back to the glory of Book 1.

Book one had the most simplest plot and most fluent storyline than in any other book. Even TLEA.

I think I could recall a lot more events in Book 1 than in the more recent ones because there was a lot more events and chapters that were actually necessary to the plot.

So, to go by statistics;

TLEA has the most recorded chapters in the series as of current before the release of OTK with 35 chapters and 3 parts to divide it.

It's followed by Book 1 with 30 chapters.

Then QfG is next with 28 chapters divided into 2 parts.

And aCoT follows with 27 chapters and 2 parts as well.

Last is AWWP with 24 chapters divided into 2 parts as well.

If going by this then OTK should either have a chapter or two more or less than TLEA but not less so than Book 1 because it's going to now be the official last book of the the series.

But that is besides the point. My main problem with the books' storytelling after Book 1 is how disoriented it has become.

Let me make an example with QfG and aCoT. These books are more or less very similar with each other in the number of chapters with only one being the difference while the start of the the "Part 2" portion was a bit different with QfG's starting at chapter 21 while aCoT's started with chapter 17.

But the reception and the fluency of these two books could not be more different from each other.

To say that QfG completely destroyed the fandom is an understatement. I can't tell of aCoT managed to regain the series's former glory for long enough to not let OTK flop but let's be hopeful.

Anyways, the fluency of the storytelling with TCY was wack and QfG and aCoT completely show that.

WARNING: Spoilers about QfG and aCoT will be discussed in this section.

I could not remember almost 70% of QfG because of how much I hated the plot and looking back at the chapters, I honestly could not believe that the asshat Rhian was only introduced on Chapter 21. Everything after Chaddick's POV chapter seemed to be a blur and Rhian's b*tch ass seemed to have corrupted the whole experience.

8 chapters. He was only in QfG for 8 chapters and yet it feels almost like he's been in it for more than half. Frick. He is traumatizing.

Basically, the middle part of the book, namely chapters 7 to 20, was all about the main cast trying to frickin understand wtf was happening. Agatha and Sophie were trying to figure out the Lion and the Snake thing while Tedros was back in Camelot doing (or failing or being sabotaged with) politics and also trying to understand why tf was Excalibur having a tantrum.

Then Rhian entered and I don't know why or how Nottingham and Robin Hood got involved but he did.

And then more figuring out stuff and sabotaging Tedros and then Rhian and Excalibur and then cliffhanger.

It was all very abrupt and confusing. More confusion was added all because there were more questions asked than actual answers and a sense of depression was felt in the end because nothing was really achieved.

Imma compare this with Book 1 later but first Book 5 comparison.

Now aCoT. It was just the storyline that we needed to get back to the hype that the series had. Was it a satisfying read? Yes but was it able to heal the pain that QfG inflicted? No.

The fandom did not come back the same again.

But anyways, aCoT, personally, had a lot more scenes and events that I remembered than in any other book besides book 1 but that there was the problem with this book.

Too many things happened with this book. So much so that the fluency of the story was sacrificed to tell it.

Look at it this way, several shifts in the book happened.

This all happened in Part 1 only;

Rhian became King and his regime was sort of explained.

Agatha was introduced to the First Years and got her Army.

Sophie was in some sort of GOT-esque knock off experience as Rhian's Captive Queen.

Agatha manages to save some of her friends.

The concept of OTK was explained.

Tedros's execution was on way.

Nevermind, Agatha and her army just straight-up hijacked it.

Prof. Dovey died as a sacrifice.

Okay, now to Part 2;

Reaper is a Gnome King.

The Crystal of Time was finally explained.

They finally find out about Rhian and Japeth's origins.

The Gnomes were ambushed and I feel sorry for them.

Sophie tipped Rhian off with the location because she believed that she would end it all.

We kinda get background with why Rhian wants to be OTK????

Rhian DIES?!?!?! and now Japeth's King ☠

They sort of manage to know about wtf happened with the Lady and Japeth

Tedros and Arthur have a heart to heart and he gets the Ring of Power.

Cliffhanger

It's a lot to take in and I don't really think that Soman should have cramped it all in one book.

Some of the plot points should have been in QfG so that it wouldn't be as depressing.

The whole of Part one was a book in itself and Part 2 was one as well.

At some points of the book, I sometimes got the feeling that it was gonna be the end but it just kept going and going and now I don't really know what's left with OTK. It can be both a good thing or a horrible thing.

Let's see wtf happens. I expect more action than drama Soman.

So again with Book 1.

Book 1 was a classic and the ideas easily hooked anyone interested.

It had the same unaswered questions with QfG but why did it suceed when QfG didn't.

First, is that Book 1 had its atmosphere clear from the start of the book. It was clear that the main thing that needed to happen was that Sophie and Agatha needed to realize the actual nature of their souls. There were more technical questions that needed to be answered but the main point that needed to be addressed was addressed by the end of the book.

And also the ending was also a cliffhanger but it a much lighter note.

Sophie and Agatha realized their capabilities and understood themselves but they still chose each other in the end and that sort of gave way to a much hopeful future for the two of them. (At that time, at least)

All the while, QfG was one depressing ball of events that led to one horrible moment to the other.

It was just sad.

And so I kinda go back to Book 1 from time to time to refresh myself with why I started this series to begin with and I'm always reminded with the possibilities and the explorations about good and evil and the complex duality of differences and parallels that so many things that Sophie and Agatha sort of beautifully personify.

I love reading the very first chapter of Book 1 because it so beautifully captured Sophie and Agatha and their complex relationship that I've always wanted to read in other books.

I always loved reading Sophie's amusing thought process and the reason why she does everything that she does; she does it because she believes that she deserves more and she'll everything to get it.

I also loved how Agatha was such a character that I've always wanted to read about. She's spunky and shy and lonely and reflective and despite everyone shunning her, she could still see the good and find it in herself to help them. She was simply wonderful.

I'm thankful that I found this series and I hope that a lot more books can talk about the philosophies and concepts that this book has managed to introduce. And despite all of its set-backs and nonsense, I would still recommend this as a read but to that they should also think about what they've read and maybe talk about what they've found interesting with it.

#sge #sfgae #tsfgae #the school for good and evil #school for good and evil #soman chainani #agatha of woods beyond #agatha of camelot #sophie of woods beyond

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ruiyuki-archives · 4 years

Text

bnha x psycho pass AU

This is an AU I wrote on the todomomo discord server eons ago. Anything posted to this blog will be transcripts of old original work and not really edited, save for formatting. I have no guarantees if I will ever finish these AUs either so these will only be kept as an archive.

Original transcript posted to tdmm discord: Mar 2019

OK @xharu‘s tdmm psycho pass au fanart got me like 💡💡💡 all day at work so like ASHFJGLS JUST TAKE THIS IDEA VOMIT

ok so part of me wants to have Inspector!Momo and Enforcer!Todo but also Inspector!Todo makes so much more sense

esp if All Might and Endeavor are high ranking inspectors in the Public Safety Bureau

So like lets go with Inspector!Todo that needs to live up to his dad's reputation and very-good-at-her-job-but-not-always-confident Inspector!Momo as a team leading Division 1

That consists of Todo, Momo, and KamiJirou as enforcers and two others idk I haven’t decided yet

BUT ANYWAY Inspector!Todo takes his job very seriously like Gino in pp s1 bc not only is there living up to Endeavor's reputation, its also making sure he doesn’t fuck up his psycho pass bc he’s not the first one to walk down the MWPSB path

Bc knowing me, ofc im gonna throw in Dabi there and ofc its going to be Dabi who was the first one to become an inspector for the MWPSB like Endeavor and ofc his story is that his pp falls down into latent criminal status and he’s demoted into Enforcer

And duh Endeavor is disappointed af that his eldest became an Enforcer and thus becomes that trash dad he is putting pressure on Todo to do better than his brother

And this is just more backstory not related to tdmm but y’all need context so.....

Dabi's an Enforcer who somehow manages to run away from house arrest in the MWPSB while on a mission and goes into hiding bc duh Sybil's got eyes everywhere

So on the run Latent Criminal Dabi manages to join up with Shigaraki's gang who are also a bunch of LCs hiding underground, and you can guess the rest but also more on that later

Ok back to tdmm:

Todo always tries to keep his crime coefficient at like 65 bc it really doesn’t go any lower considering he is under stress and he knows and that makes it worse so ya really like s1 Gino

Momo's good with her pp like Akane is so honestly it keeps around 20-30

(And for those that didn’t know, crime coefficients: 0-100 = you’re good, 100-300 = latent criminal, 300+ = Sybil doesn’t like you)

And Jirou probably hang around 110-120... Kaminari probs a little higher 150ish and part of me wants to make him like Kagari whos pp has been above 100 his whole life but nah im not gonna do that bc that’s playing the trope card

Anyway........

Other MWPSB members probably like this:

already mentioned All Might and Endeavor as top inspectors

Nedzu as the chief bc he knows and y k n o w from s1 👀👀👀

Division 2 is probs led by Inspector!Deku and Inspector!Bakugou under the mentorship of All Might

(another part of me wants to put Enforcer!Bakugou on tdmm's team but im really fighting myself over this)

Aizawa is Professor Saiga. thats it there’s nothing else.

Ok i lied maybe something else lmao idk mebbe Aizawa was an inspector during All Might’s and Endeavor’s generation but retired bc his pp was getting cloudy AND he clouds other people

but that doesn’t stop Dhinsou from getting mentored by him and eyyy Shinsou becomes the MWPSB's interrogator like Saiga does in s2

idk whos gonna be the analyst yet bc im learning toward Tsuyu for some reason

wait no scratch that. Eccentric analyst should be HATSUME MEI bc ofc shjfkaoa

Kendou, Tetsutetsu, Monoma and Yui and idk who else from 1-B make up Division 3 bc must have Class B in there and KendouMomo friendship okay

OKAY now then......

AfO is criminally asymptomatic (aka is villain af but Sybil doesn’t recognize his CC as what it really is) bc ofc he is

And guess what, Shig is too

So AfO nurtures Shig into a master manipulator n all that bc ofc he does bc "they’re both special"

And ofc AfO learns the secret of Sybil and becomes part of Sybil too bc y’know that’s how it is

But Shig doesn’t know that and he’s on a mission to find out where adoptive criminally asymptomatic mastermind dad went

But really this story will be Shig v Deku's team cuz gotta keep it organic

And tdmm's team will be v Dabi BC Y’KNOW

Makishima's role from the original pp will prob be divided between Shig and Dabi bc ya, sure, Shig is criminally asymptomatic but Dabi was an Inspector and knows the ins and outs of MWPSB so that’s why he joins Shig so they can play the system

So like, pp s1 there’s a bunch of cases that tdmm team goes thru thus:

1) one of em is Overhaul who runs a drug ring selling drugs that artificially lowers one's psycho pass

2) Gentle whos been quarantined his whole life in rehab bc his pp has been 100+ his whole life but breaks out bc he just really wants to be an Inspector of the MWPSB

And now the meat of tdmm is that they've been partners for a long time on Division 1 but even though they’re the same rank Momo relies on Todo too often for decisions on how to handle a case and Todo's always under pressure from Endeavor, he doesn,t ask for help when really EVERYONE CAN SEE IT. HE NEEDS MOMO AS HIS EMOTIONAL CRUTCH

Okay so idk what he actually did to incite the case (probably tried to bomb smth tbh) but the general idea is after tdmm team runs into Dabi and they confront him like Kogami + Akane did with Makishima at the tower. Basically, Todo loses it with seeing Touya becoming Dabi and tries to lethal eliminate him but ofc Momo knows that’s not the right thing to do since Dabi's coeff isnt 300+ yet and has to stop Todo but also stop Dabi from getting away

And Todo seeing Dabi makes his pp creep up reaaalllly close to 100+ which is Todo's greatest fear

So. Momo in the moment has to like throw the dominators away, tie up Todo or smth and knock out dabi all in a split second

And then finally todo comes to his senses while tied up and collapses on the floor like "im sorry.... thank you Momo. I believed in you"

And she collapses on the floor beside him too and they both kinda just put their heads together to take a moment bc ahsjjdslfs the whole situation was just too much

AT THE VERY END FINALE (assuming Dabi escapes like Makishima did or smth) WHEN TODO FINDS HIM, DABI'S GONNA BE LIKE "Im happy it ends this way and happy you found her bc I didn’t have someone like that to keep me afloat under all of dad's pressure"

(Note: whatever "ends this way" entails has yet to be decided)

(But he’s not gonna die and im not making Todo a killer)

this story could end with him leaving the country like Kogami did

And hey y’know what. lets do that. He escapes. that’s a re-occuring theme here lol

FOR FUNSIES:

The blossoming romance w Momo is what keeps Todo’s pp down. like it gradually drops from 65 to 40ish and he doesn’t notice it as plot and romance goes on until the very end when, the day after the finale when Dabi escapes, he wakes up, has an Official Date™ w Momo and then checks his pp later which suddenly is at 40

Qjdkkfsk how funny would it be if every time Todo thinks pervy thoughts of Momo his pp tracker spikes up from 40 to 70+ and whoever checks the trackers see it 😂😂😂

Bakugou just happens to check the monitors as Deku walks in like "Kacchan lets go its our shift" and Deku sees it too and he gets worried and consults Iida who talks to Kaminari bc he’s on Todo’s team and it goes around the MWPSB like wildfire among all the guys

So going out for drinks later is like 8 of them sans the Enforcers and really, most of the time Deku and Bakugou have their pp under control but when Todo tells them abt that moment, everyone is too sh00k and then THE WHOLE GROUP'S PP GETS TOO HIGH AND CAUSES AN AREA EFFECT ADKJDFJDAHSFK

the iinspectors themselves instigate a psycho hazard and the enforcers that stayed back, particularly the girls are like what the fuCK Guys

It probably becomes an inside joke among all the guys some ways down the line. they had to do their own damage control and it was A Disaster™ 😂😂😂

Aizawa is still the captain of the ship in this au bc even though he’s basically Saiga and retired, All might & Endeavor tell bkdk and tdmm's team to consult him bc he has really good insight on cases

and when Aizawa meets tdmm when they consult with him over Dabi's case he's so ONBOARD

And mebbe helps out with Todo's pp problem like dropping hints that hey, y’know, mebbe your partner can help - in more ways than one - if you just listen to her instead of tryna bottle it up all yourself

kamijirou has had a bet for how long it'll take them to fuck since they've been assigned under tdmm

Aizawa joins in on the bet

And honestly Bakugou probably does too only bc he gets pissed off looking at the unresolved sexual tension and being the victim so he wants to win

> archives masterpost

#todomomo #todoroki shouto #momo yaoyorozu #bnha x psycho pass #psycho pass au #ruiyukis unfinished aus #this one was a lot of fun #when will i stop writing dabi into tdmm aus #the answer is never #IDK man just take it

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did-he-just-hiss-at-me · 5 years

Text

A Lonely Birthday?

warnings: very long. apologies if it takes a long time to scroll past; loneliness, heavy angst, hurt/comfort, touch starvation, war mention(a food war), food mention

summary: Logan almost feels lonelier than ever, on the day of his creation, aka his "birthday".

ships: platonic dlampr, romantic intruloceit

au: Making Amends(my au, post-agreement)

notes: it's no longer nov 3rd here but screw it. also whoops??? i'm kinda projecting onto logan???? if it makes him out of character, sorry ~-~"

--- (cant cut on mobile)

Logan awoke to hear some commotion downstairs. Sounded like a ton of metal hitting the kitchen's tiled floor. Sitting up, he put on his glasses and checked his alarm clock. It was roughly 5AM. Nobody's usually up at this time, except for Virgil on rare occasion. But then again, Virgil is way too cautious to make so much noise.

Sunlight was shining bright through his mindscape window; burning his eyes, and forcing him to look away. Logan glanced over at the ocean creature themed calendar on his door, a big red circle catching his attention. His birthday.

Logan felt an unfamiliar feeling in his stomach, presumably the "sinking feeling" that the others talk about. He wasn't used to having so much attention focused on him as it is, today had to be worse.

Things had been a bit difficult in the mindscape despite them simultaneously getting better; the divide between The Dark Sides and The Light Sides is diminishing fast(at this point, they can even enter each other's common areas without getting sick) and everyone was working through their issues for once.

It felt stupid to be so worked up over an inconsequential day like this. But ever since he started opening up he'd been feeling all sorts of illogical things. Emotions, and stuff. Revealing things that he never would have prior to the merge starting. Logan had been mildly touch starved for ages and gotten used to being ignored for so long... he didn't know what he was feeling or what to feel and it was happening so fast. Logan previously was purposefully hiding whenever he could because everything felt so wrong. It left a chilling, hollow feeling in his chest and the palms of his hands.

But... he shouldn't be doing this. Logan knows this. It's illogical to express these behaviors, and he was trying hard to get through this confusing time. So, Logan was going to make today the best of his birthdays(since he had a track record of lonely birthdays.)

Logan changed out of his pajamas, into a nice outfit, slightly different than usual due to his special day. Instead of his usual shirt, he had a black long-sleeve collared shirt on, and his tie now was dark indigo & purple with constellations. A gift from last year's christmas, from Virgil.

Logan almost got caught up in thoughts about how close he used to be to Virgil(their friendship had been dwindling,) but that was interrupted by more noise; this time hearing more things hitting the floor along with panicked shouting.

Logan walked down the hall, over to the kitchen, or he would have if not for a certain liar stopping and grabbing his shoulder. "Horrible morning, Lo. What brings you out here this early? It's almost 5:30AM, I know better than anyone that isn't part of your schedule." questioned Deceit. He seemed to be nervous.

"Although I should be asking you the same since I know you're a late sleeper, I'll let it slide for the moment." Logan replied while looking at Deceit's semi dark circles, clearly revealing his lack of sleep. "But if you must know, I've heard commotion coming from the kitchen twice now and I'm getting concerned."

Deceit's eyes widened mid-yawn "No-no-no Logan;" he stopped Logan as he started to leave again. "I checked on them already, they're absolutely fine, no worries!"

Logan looked at snakey side with suspicion. Deceit was still trying his hardest to control his lying more often, which results in him accidentally making truths sound like lies.

"I will, uh, take your word for it. I guess i can go back to sleep or something. Let me know when breakfast is ready, babe." Logan informed Dee, who was blushy from being called 'babe'.

"Oh I, uh-absolutely not then, see you!" Deceit hissed nervously & quietly dashed away to the kitchen. It didn't hit him that he forgot to wish his nerdy boyfriend a happy birthday, he was too concerned about making sure the others didn't get into trouble.

...

Deceit entered the kitchen, late enough to see a disaster all over. There was flour, batter, jam, & frosting all over the room, including on the ceiling. He glanced over at Patton & Roman(whom were making breakfast) and saw sheepish expressions on their faces. He then turned his head over to Virgil & Remus, who were starting out the cake. Virgil & Remus had the most ingredients all over them, as if they were in a battlezone, with Patton & Roman looking as if they got stained in the crossfire.

"What the heck happened here?! You guys didn't wake Logan up, he was nowhere close to coming in here and- ugh!" he questioned, clearly disconcerted. Deceit was freaking out over the disaster before him.

"We can explain!" Roman whisper-shouted.

"We have 3 explanations!" blurted out Virgil.

"Pick your favorite!~" Remus exclaimed with a sing-songy voice, grinning. He was hanging from the ceiling, directly above the anxious Side. He then promptly fell onto the emo. "aCK-!" "ooF, sorry Virge!"

Roman was snickering at the two on the floor, but Patton elbowed him. "ow- Sorry!" quietly came from the prince's mouth.

"Logan almost came out here and spoiled the surprise because of our actions! We need to be more careful; Today needs to be perfect for Logan, he deserves it!" exclaimed Patton.

"Wrong. Now Patton, how close are you two being done with the Loganberry pancakes?" Deceit asked patiently. Logan was back asleep, but it was nearing the time he was supposed to wake up, 7AM. They, but especially Deceit, did not want Logan to have to work at all today. He already has a work-free schedule today, but they didn't want to take chances.

"They're almost done!" Patton replied. "Dee, Roman, you guys get out all the toppings please! Virgil, I would love it if you would set up the table for us; And Remus-" Patton's instructions were interrupted by the mustachioed Side.

"Oh oh, can I go get Logan out of bed? I wanna do this personally!" Remus energetically asked with his hand up, like a kid in school.

"Well, I was gonna ask you to bring the pancakes"-Patton pointed to the large plate stacked with Loganberry Pancakes-"to the table, but I'll let you do that instead as long as you don't bring anything Logan may find gross to the table at least this one time."

"I was already planning on doing that, you don't think that I would want to make Logan's day special too?" a sarcastically accusatory tone came from the green creative Side.

"Not at all!" Patton chuckled nervously. "Permission granted."

"Goody!" Remus exclaimed with childlike glee. Roman rolled his eyes with a smile at his brother. His rat-like brother sure did love that nerd.

...

As the the other sides were finishing setting up breakfast at the table, Logan's alarm went off. Gentle classical music waking him from his sleep-or rather, nap. Stepping out of bed, the smell of crofters filled his nose. He could smell his favorite Loganberry Pancakes all the way from here.

During Logan's tidying up of his appearance, Remus knocked on the door(and then proceeded to open it despite no response. Classic Remus.) "Oh Lo-Lo! Wakey wakey! Patton & Roman made breakfast! Guess what it is~!" the green & black fanciful Side shouted, with a bit of flair in his rhetorical question.

"Well Remus, I'm sure you knew that I could smell them from my room, I could smell Crofters from anywhere." the nerd chuckled.

Remus laughed. "Of course I knew that, my dear blackhole!" Logan smiled at the nickname.

The Duke came over to his favorite nerd across the room and gave him a big hug, and his usual good morning kiss. "See you at breakfast!"

Remus sunk out, feeling as if something had slipped his mind. But if his time with Deceit has taught him anything, 'If you forgot it, it couldn't have been important.' Remus didn't know that his snake friend was lying.

Logan stood there for a moment. Twice now; his boy friends showed no indication that they knew it was his birthday. Logan didn't even know why he cared; they had no reason to be celebrating such events, they were just metaphysical human beings inside of Thomas's head. Celebrating birthdays and stuff had no impact.

But still, it left Logan with an empty feeling, Remus's warmth being replaced with the usual chill he felt.

...

Hearing Logan's familiar footsteps approach the dining room, Virgil glanced and over and noticed the living room-which was openly connected to the dining room-had noticeable decorations, causing his eyes to widen in fear. Sitting across from Roman, he whisper-shouted to the royal; "Roman! The decorations! Lo's coming!!"

"What? Oh, right!" quietly came the response. Roman stood up and did a magic spell using his hands, causing the living room to be disguised with a glamour. He had been saving this particular spell for a while, he cannot use spells too often outside of the imagination. The red-sashed prince was glad to have it handy.

"Wow, Roman!" Patton admired, just as he closed the curtains of the window between the kitchen and dining room. They didn't want Logan to see the mess after all, so the door between the two rooms was shut too. "If only I could do that!"

"Maybe if you struck a deal with the Dragon Witch, haha!" the prince responded.

Logan entered the room and stopped when we saw all the food across the table. His eyes were filled with wonder. "Wow..."

"Morning, Lo-Lo! It was your turn to have your choice of breakfast, but we knew what you would want anyway!" greeted Patton.

"Sup, L." "Good morning, nerd!" came from the other two whom had yet to greet him.

Logan sat down at the only empty seat, right beside his loving boyfriends, Deceit & Remus. His pancakes were just the way he loved them: Perfectly thin, just the right amount of fluffiness; and they were topped with syrup, whipped cream, and an assortment of berries.

"Hey, just the way I like them. Thanks." said Logan to nobody in particular. He glanced at each of them with a smile.

"No problem Logan, that was not my doing." answered Deceit.

"I wanted to help too though!" cried Remus.

"You tried to drench his pancakes in chocolate syrup..." Everybody else laughed.

"It's alright Remus, I don't need you to do this for me to know how much you love me." Logan comforted Remus with his smile.

"Get a room!" groaned Roman & Virgil, sarcastically. They both giggled after that, seeing the couple blush before them.

...

"So, any plans for today? Anything special that I may have forgotten to add to my calendar?" queried Logan.

"Oh Logan, there's no way you would be forgetting something, you always have everything on the calendar the moment you hear about it!" dismissed Patton.

"Oh, alright then, good to know." Disappointment. None of them had said Happy Birthday. He didn't want to just mention it, that feels wrong. So he carried on with breakfast.

By the time he was finished, the Creativi-twins were already gone; Virgil was on his phone, showing a bunch of animal photos and wholesome memes to Patton(who was right next to him), and Deceit was in the kitchen. Logan got up to go wash his plate; Patton noticed and nudged Virgil to go stop him, pointing at both Virge and Logan's plates. Virgil nodded.

"Oh, Lo, let me get that for you!" the hoodie-wearing Side got up and yelled, stopping Logan from walking into the kitchen. He gently took Logan's plate away from him and hastily went into the kitchen, making sure to not let Logan see as much behind the door as possible.

Logan, being oblivious said "Oh... uhm, ok. Thank you Virgil." and sank back into his room.

Patton quickly sank out to get Remus & Roman so they could continue with decorating.

"Alright you two, you can get back to decorating the living room!"

"Thank goodness, I wasn't sure how much longer I could take." said Roman with a relieved sigh. You see, Roman can't hold a spell outside the imagination up for long without feeling discomfort and having to put all his focus into it. The Creatwins had lied saying they had something to do together, and went to Roman's room so they don't raise suspicion around Logan.

"But I wanna keep helping Emo-nesance with the cake!" cried Remus.

"Don't worry Remus; I'm sure your creativity would be more helpful to Roman since you have a better idea of what Logan likes!" Patton reassured.

"Plus, you were sorta the cause of that huge mess to begin with, we need to clean that up. NOT have a bigger disaster." added Roman.

Remus agreed and they went to work decorating.

...

Virgil shut the door, relieved. He heard Logan's "thank you" outside the door, but was too anxious to respond. This anxiety-based side was leaning up against the door, taking deep breaths.

"Wow, Virgil. You don't look like you're going to flip out. What happened?" questioned Deceit, whom was washing the dishes.

"Logan almost came in here and saw the mess." was the reply, between a few deep breaths.

"Well, bad thing you stopped him then."

"I wouldn't have noticed if not for Patton, haha." Virgil said as he walked away from the door. "Speaking of which, I'm waiting on him to get the twins so Pat & I can finish up the cake;" glancing over at the bowls of cake batter & frosting strewn across the counters along with other baking things.

Patton suddenly opened the door, the door hitting the wall and making a loud, sudden noise. "Alright! Cake & bake time!" he giggled. Virgil jumped about a foot, clearly caught off guard.

"I- L- Uhm- Oh-...Phew... it's just you Patton. Speak of the angel." he said with relief, adding a chuckle at the end. "I thought you were Logan for a moment there."

"Sorry to scare you kiddo!" came as an apology from the Dad. "Setting that aside, let's finish this cake! Do you wanna help, D- ...Oh."

Deceit had slipped out of the room before either side could notice.

"No worries Pat, he's probably wrapping up his gift now, he mentioned it to me earlier." winked Virgil, acknowledging his pun.

That pun, of course, was met with a hug that almost toppled the two over.

...

It continued to repeat.

Alone in his room. Feeling the need to leave his room. Being subtly stopped, going back to his room. Finally come out for meal(for the final two meals, two different Sides got to choose the meal, but they chose something they knew Logan would like that wouldn't be too suspicious), nothing happens, return to his room again, repeat.

8PM. Logan felt what he predicted to be 'heartache' in his chest. It really does seem like everybody forgot, even though he did try his hardest to make subtle hints here or there, but perhaps they were just too difficult for the others. (Hint, they actually weren't subtle...)

Curled up on top of his bed, tears forming in his eyes, and that hollow chill returned. This was illogical to for him to feel. He shouldn't be dealing with these issues, that's Patton's job. Logan's expectations of the others were too high, they had forgotten his birthday. He really should have said something earlier. But it was way too late now.

Logan felt cognitive distortions flow through his thoughts. He couldn't control them. He began to think that finally intentionally opening himself up to the others was a mistake. Perhaps he would be the same as before if he just never fell in love. Or joined the FamILY. Things could have been easier. He wouldn't have to feel pain like this.

It was way too early to go to bed, but as the tears trailed down his cheeks, he found himself setting his glasses on his nightstand and pulling his weighted blanket over his shivering body.

...

"Alright everyone, is everything ready?" semi-loudly announced Patton.

"Decorations: Done!" Roman confirmed, high-fiving his twin. The two did a great job, they really got what Logan would like just perfectly. Not too extravagant, just a perfect balance.

"I didn't check with everybody already, none of Logan's gifts are ready." responded the snake-Side with an excited and reassuring expression.

"The cake is done, you know that already, Pop-corn." Virgil said with a metaphoric nudge. It was a two-layer, whipped-vanilla-frosted, galaxy-theme-decorated sheet cake. And both layers have crofters frosting inbetween the top and bottom half. Not too much to overwhelm the cake's taste, just perfect.

"I know Virge, I just wanted to hear everybody say that they're done! It makes it feel more complete." admitted Patton. "So that means we're all ready! Get to your places everybody, I'm going to sink out and get Lo-Lo!"

The other four sides scrambled to their places as the sky-blue Side tried to sink into the hall, right into Logan's room. He even made sure his entry was clear. But despite his efforts, he was met with a thump. He couldn't get through.

He tried a few more times. "That's odd, i'm almost always welcome in his room. It's very hard to particularly block somebody out." concern came from Patton's mouth.

"Let me try-" Virgil tried to say but was interrupted by Deceit.

"Yes. Despite my suspicions, this isn't one bit more serious. It might be worse that his boyfriends try to get him." the scaley Side reasoned.

Virgil nodded. "I guess you're right. But what do you mean, your 'suspicions'?"

"Well, you see... It takes alot of brain power to consciously block someone from entering your room. You could stop me from entering yours after all." Deceit paused to look the purple emo in the eyes.

"But it can't easily be done subconsciously, if it's what you want. Logan's unlikely sleeping... which is half the reason I am concerned."

"What do you mean, Fibber On The Roof?" asked Roman, with an unsettling feeling in his stomach.

"One, Logan absolutely sleeps at this time. He prefers to get 8 hours of sleep, period. Sleeping now would lead to too much sleep. Second... well, why wouldn't he want to keep any of us out?" Deceit directed his answers to Roman.

"Why would our dork be asleep at this time?" questioned Remus with a bit of concern.

"I know, but we definitely shouldn't go see what's going on..." responded the snake, lowering his head a bit. "Let's try walking there."

As the sides walked down the hallway to Logan's door Virgil put a hand on the Dad's shoulder, catching his attention. "Do you feel... something weird around us? Like, emotionally?"

"Oh... now that you mention it, I knew I felt something off... it's a sad aura for sure." was the reply. "How did you know?"

"I could feel something too. I think it has something to do with Logan..." Virgil said with a hint of concern.

The two chatting sides, who were a bit behind the others, finally got to the door. "I think you might just be right." reaffirmed the cardigan-wearing Side.

Deceit knocked on the door, in a specific pattern. Two knocks, two knocks, three knocks. Logan & Dee created a door-knocking code to know the basics of why they were trying to come in. Deceit used the "Worried about you" knock.

There was no response. The lying Side tried to turn the doorknob, but it wouldn't budge. Everyone glanced at each other with increasing worry. "Logan, please wake up and unlock the door. This isn't like you." Patton tried.

Roman whispered to Remus. The green twin nodded and summoned his morning star. Everyone was already stepped to the side, so Roman walked to the opposite side of the wall to L's room and prepared to charge.

Virgil had been discussing with Deceit when he noticed what was about to happen. "Roman, what are you-" the red royal Side finally charged. "ROMAN DON'T-" Virgil yelled, catching the others attention, causing them to watch.

Roman ran up to the door and tried to break it open with his brother's morning star. Upon impact, instead of breaking like wood, it acted like solid metal. There wasn't even a scratch on the logical nerd's dark blue door.

Due to the unexpected outcome, Roman fell over, hitting his elbows and shoulder blades on the ground as he tried to save himself. "ROMAN!" cried the cat-loving dad.

Patton & Remus went and helped Princey up, while the other two just stood there and shook their heads. "I'm good, don't worry guys. I've been through worse."

"If Logan does want us to come in, what made you think breaking the door would work?" queried Deceit about Roman's decisions.

"...Well, when you put it that way, I guess that makes sense. But it was worth a shot, right Lyin' Manuel Miranda?" Roman sheepishly tried to reason.

Deceit sighed and shook his head again. "Well, luckily for us, I think I thought of a solution that could work." the snake shape-shifted into, well, a snake.

"Oh, oh! I'll come too!" exclaimed Remus, shape-shifting into a tiny rat, the same height as Deceit.

As the two successfully snuck under the door, the other three watched them with surprised looks. Virgil broke the silence, saying "Roman, I'm not gonna lie, but I thought your idea was more plausible than theirs." (heh, Dee pun)

...

Once through, Logan's boyfriends shifted back to their regular forms. They saw their nerd lying on his bed sideways, turned away from them and grasping his star-themed weighted blanket tightly. (heh, another Dee pun)

Deceit whispered in Remus's ear. "Go unlock the door and let everyone in. Make sure they stay quiet and to the side for now. We don't want to overwhelm him." Remus nodded and went to get the others.

The snake-faced Side walked over to the logical Side's bed and sat in front of him. He started to rub his back and gently wake his boyfriend up.

"Logan, hey, wake up, please."

Logan groaned and opened his eyes. They were red, like he'd been crying. Well, now that he noticed it, Deceit could see tear track stains on the nerd's cheeks. Logan's expression changed from a tired one to a worried one as soon as he realized who woke him up.

"Dee, why are you in here...?" he queried with a mildly distressed tone.

"Well, first of all, you're not following your schedule which was concerning us, second off you were forbidding us from entering while you slept, and third, we-" Deceit's ramblings were cut off by Logan pulling him into a hug.

"Dangit, that wasn't very smart of me..." Logan choked out with a half-hearted chuckle. Voice shaking, he continued with "I... I sh-should've said something-"

"-What do you mean?" Right on cue, the others entered and were listening. Logan still hasn't noticed them.

"I've felt so lonely all day... I haven't felt this feeling since before we all made amends, it all feels so wrong and illogical and it doesn't help th-that-" he started sobbing into Dee's chest.

At this point everyone came up and started to comfort Logan. His boyfriends were hugging him tight, Patton was rubbing circles and other shapes into Logan's back, and the other two were just making sure their presence was known by occasionally saying comforting words with the others.

Finally after what felt like hours(but was actually a quarter of an hour, Logan spat out the rest of his sentence from before. "I-I thought... that you guys had forgotten about my birthday..." he said in between sniffles.

Realization hit all of them at once. They all had been practically ignoring them while they were making sure his party was perfect, not to mention none of them even wished him a happy birthday.

"Oh L... we're all so sorry." apologized Virgil on behalf of the others.

"We were all just so busy behind the scenes, we forgot to make sure you felt notice today!" explained Roman.

"It's quite alright, Roman," said Logan, smiling though there were tears still in the nerd's eyes. "Although... what do you mean 'behind the scenes'?"

The others glanced at each other. Remus stepped in, saying "Oh, you'll see! Go ahead and tidy yourself up first-"the green Side pointed at Logan's messy hair, tear-stained cheeks, reddened eyes and wrinkled clothing. "-And then, you might want to come to the living room, haha!" he laughed. Patton nodded.

"Let Virgil know when you're ready, we'll be in the living room." The others sunk out; while Virgil left the room. Before he was out of sight, he winked at Logan with a gentle smile.

...

In the living room, the others waited in the dark, quietly. They heard footsteps approach, or rather, just Logan's. Virgil has light footsteps, after all. "-I really don't see the point in having my eyes covered Virgil, I can't see where I'm going-"

Patton whisper-yelled. "They're coming, stay in your positions!"

"-Don't worry Logan, we're almost there, just a little more... There!" Virgil finished guiding Logan to the center of the living room and removed the scarf he had tied over his eyes.

Virgil flicked the lightswitch beside him, and everyone jumped out, yelling "SURPRISE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY LOGAN!"

A happy birthday, indeed.

...

(Epilogue: His gifts uwu)

"Alrighty Lo-Lo, are you ready to open our gifts?" Patton asked, bouncing with excitement.

"Why, of course."

"Alright then, open mine first!" Patton handed Logan a large(about as big as his torso), shiny, blue gift bag.

Upon opening it, he found a light brown stuffed bear and a little white notecard. Logan took a moment to admire the bear, he was awestruck by it. It was super soft and cuddly, its face was comforting to look at; The belly, paws, and inner ears were white and covered with tiny, shiny blue stars. The eyes changed depending on the angle you looked at it; Green at some angles, then brown, blue, purple, and so on. It even had a nice indigo galaxy print bow tied around the neck with the bow in the back.

"Patton... this is... impractical, but I love it regardless." he said with a smile.

Patton came up and gave him a hug. "Don't forget to read the card!" he cheerily reminded.

The small card had a cute little bear face and a bunch of stars all over it. Logan read it aloud; 'To our favorite left-brain nerd, Lo-Gi bear.' He groaned and gently pushed Patton away, while everyone else laughed.

"Here, you cannot open mine next." offered the snake. Deceit handed Logan a black, square box about the width of a shoe, tied with a silver ribbon.

Logan opened it to find a petaminx rubiks cube inside. All twelve sides(heh) matched each of his friends and himself, everyone having two themed sides each. The designs were intricate, making it so he would have to perfectly solve it; and Logan loved it.

Logan gave Deceit a big hug. "Thank you so much, Dee, this is wonderful." Deceit responded with "Of course, specs. I saw that the plain rubix cube you have was getting too easy for you, so I spent a while making this one for you."

Once their hug ended, Virgil cleared his throat and spoke up. "Here's mine, it's nothing really special..." the emo handed Logan a clothing giftbox and stuffed his hands back in his hoodie pockets.

Logan opened the box to find a nice blue cardigan sweater(like this one but with silver buttons and subtle constellations all over) inside. "'Nothing special'? Virgil, I cannot describe how much I appreciate this. Thank you." Logan reassured Virgil with a smile. Virge smiled back.

"Try it on, Lo!" cheered Patton, silently clapping.

Logan snaps his fingers, and immediately he's wearing the cardigan. It fits him well, definitely making him look more handsome. His boyfriends were swooning, and his friends were admiring the fact that for once, Logan looks so much happier.

"Well then; Roman, would you like to show me your gift next?" Logan snapped everyone back to reality, slightly blushing still.

"Oh! Of course, Galaxy Geek! Although, I must confess-" Roman started before Remus excitedly interrupted him.

"We had a big influence on each other's gifts! It's still our own gifts to you but we never would have finished these on our own!" Lo's ratty boyfriend proudly chuckled.

"Aww, I'm proud of you two!" cheered Patton once more. He hugged the Creatwins tight, happy with the progress they've been making.

"Thanks, Pat." Roman gave his gratitude. "Anyways," the prince pulled away from the hug. "You might wanna prepare yourself Lo, this is going to be big!" he boasted.

He presented a Book-sized moving-esque box, but much nicer. When Logan unwrapped the box, he was met with several thick, leather-bound books. Each had a title on them, written in silver ink.

"I've been working for ages, writing all these stories that I knew you would love!" Roman began to explain. "I even accidentally missed last year's christmas working on them..." he regrettably admited. "Oh, and last time, when I gave you that Sherlock Holmes fanfiction I knew that you weren't exactly a fan of the cover, so I spent a lot of time making these nice leather covers!"

Logan was surprised. "Wow, Roman... these are definitely intriguing. Thank you... wait, Remus said he helped you with these, what did he do?" he questioned.

"Oh, Remus gave me inspiration! Since prior to us all becoming friends once more, we had been unintentionally ignoring you, I wasn't quite sure what you would be interested in reading. So I went to Remus for most of the ideas, and had Deceit confirm some of the more concerning recommendations. Right Dee-More-Chill?" Roman answered, turning to the snake for confirmation.

Deceit nodded. "But speaking of our friendly stinkman, where did he go?" he looked around.

"Up here!" Remus called. He was hanging from the ceiling, again. He dropped off and fell into the deceitful Side's arms, only to be met with a bitter reaction from Virgil.

"Aw come on, I had him fall on top of me, and you caught him?!"

"Now now kiddo, relax; We're trying to fix things, remember? Let's not start a fight over something small." Patton gently reminded.

Virgil nodded. Remus ran over to the closet to get his present, calling his twin over to help carry it out. It was a large painting of a galaxy, subtly divided in thirds. One side was Roman's part of the imagination, the other side was Remus's part of the imagination, and the middle was the night sky in the real world.

Logan was-'pun not intended'-starstruck. It was beautiful. The fanciful brothers set the painting down and Logan walked up and gave them a big hug, followed by everyone else joining in.

"I told you, he would love it bro." Roman poked Remus's cheek.

"Yep! That big empty spot on the wall beside your bed had been bothering me for a while, so I thought this painting would be amazing! Roman helped with his sky and the real sky since I'm not too familiar with them." the Duke explained.

Logan chuckled. "To me, all of your existences are good." he told them, which was met with a tighter hug.

That night, they fell asleep in that same room, marathoning a ton of Logan's favorite movies and whatever else he wanted to watch.

Perhaps, Logan will finally admit to himself celebrating birthdays isn't so bad.

#logan #logan sanders #sanders sides #logic sanders #logan's bday 2019 #happy birthday logan #sanders sides fic #intruloceit #dlampr #tw war #war mention #war tw #food mention #making amends au #long post

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holylulusworld · 5 years

Text

Give me a wing (rewritten)

Summary: Sam tries to get your attention. Taking too long to ask you out, he risks you will start liking someone else.

Pairing: Sam Wilson x Reader

Characters: Clint Barton, Steve Rogers, Thor Odinson, Bucky Barnes, Wanda and Vision (mentioned), Natasha Romanoff

Warnings: angst, terrible tries to flirt with a woman, jealous Sam, tension, fluff, and some fun, mutual pining

Divider by @writeyourmindaway

“Hey…can you give me a wing?” Sam asks and you lift an eyebrow, wondering why he could need your help.

“Excuse me…what?” looking at Sam, expectantly you tap your fingers onto the kitchen counter.

“Can you give me a wing. I mean can you help with this thing…machine…uh,” gosh he’s cute while being flustered. Sam looks at you, hoping you will interact with him.

“The coffee machine? You don’t know how to handle it?” you ask suspiciously, hiding the grin that wants to form on your lips.

“Yeah…I mean no…uh,” Sam stammers, nervously playing with his fingers.

“Sure wait. Which one do you want? Black or with milk. Do you want Espresso or rather something else?” while you watch Sam find a way to ask you out, he fails epically once again as the words he wants to say just don’t want to come out of his mouth.

“Just a simple coffee, black without anything,”humming you turn your attention toward the coffee monstrosity Tony bought months ago.

“Okay, look. You press this button to choose the sort and then this one as you don’t want any ingredients. Then you place a cup here and just press start. Voilà, coffee black is on its way,” you say and Sam nods eagerly.

“Thanks. I’m a bit clumsy when it comes to Starks inventions,” you huff at Sam’s poor lie. You know first hand that he’s capable of handling any technology.

“It’s a coffee machine. You are using those high-tech wings to fly, Sam. What do you really want?” you blur out locking eyes with the handsome Avenger, hoping he will finally find the guts to ask you out.

“I really don’t know how to handle the machine. I swear, Y/N,” Sam stammers nervously, eyes squeezing shut as he tries to separate him from the situation he got himself into.

“Okay, if you say so. Have a great day, Sam,” you give him a soft smiling, hiding your disappointment, walking out of the room.

“You really should ask her out or she starts believing you are dumb, man,” Clint chuckles. “What is wrong with you around Y/N?”

“It’s not that easy. Look at her…she’s so beautiful and smart. A doctor, Clint. I’m just-,” desperating Sam looks at the coffee you made for him.

“An Avenger who saved the world more than once. A guy flying around with high-tech wings. Believe me, she likes you,” rolling his eyes Clint pats Sam’s shoulder.

“How do you want to know?” Sam mutters.

“I know, dude…I just know. I’m married, I know how women think. Ask her out,” waving Sam’s doubts off Clint gives Sam a shrug and a grin. “Grow some balls, man.”

“She’s perfect, is all...”

“I’m sorry to ask you for help again but how is the password for the system?” Sam asks playing nervously with his fingers, not meeting your gaze.

“Seriously? I gave it to you two weeks ago,” clearing your throat you try to force Sam to meet your gaze. “What happened?”

“I kinda lost it, sorry to bother you,” he looks so lost right now and your heart flutters as you know, it’s because he likes you.

“Let me reset your password and you can choose a new one. Alright. Overwriting password settings…hacking account and here we go. Choose a new password and then press enter,” you smile to yourself when Sam steps closer to look over your shoulder.

“Thanks a lot. I’m just too clumsy sometimes,” Sam lies.

“Hmm…why are you so nervous around me?” meeting Sam’s eyes you place your hand onto his forearm, causing him to shiver.

“I’m not nervous. Just a bit … uh…I chose the wrong coffee and now I’m high on caffeine,” for now, you accept his lie, but you won’t play along for much longer. If he doesn’t ask you out soon, you’ll take matters in your hands.

“I see. Next time ask me to help you with the coffee,” you say squeezing his arm. “I’m glad if I can help you, Sam.

“That would be great. Thanks for the help, Y/N,” stumbling over his words Sam smiles wildely.

“I got to go, but don’t hesitate to call me, Sam,” walking toward the door you chuckle lightly. “You got my number right?”

“No,” he gets his phone out, dropping it to the ground before he gets the chance to hand it over.

“I got yours, Sam. I’ll call you later to make sure you get technically support whenever you need it,” Sam nods, simply watches you walk out of the room.

When you left the room Sam curses…”Should’ve asked you out…”

“Indeed my friend. This lady is a wonderful dove. I wouldn’t wait for too long or another competitor will pick your flower,” Thor says watching you walk away.

“Pick my what? Can you speak English for once?” Sam mutters, glaring up at Thor. “Not everyone understands the meaning of your words.”

“How do you Midgardian say this…steal your girl,” Thor shrugs.

“You won’t steal my girl!” Sam’s competitive side got woken the moment he fears someone else could steal you away.

“It’s not me stealing your girl, my friend. I would watch your Captain if I were you,” Thor chuckles leaving the room.

“Steve? No way!”

“That’s all for today,” Steve says smiling at you.

“Great. If anyone needs help with the new battle suits just tell Stacy. The membrane should protect you from getting injured by bullets and any kind of knives even better now. It’s elastic too,” you explain.

“Wonderful my dear but I’m afraid I will not fit in this…whatever you called it,” Thor rumbles. “Can I get a larger one?”

“Don’t worry. Halfgods like you do not need that kind of armor,” you chuckle placing one hand onto Thor's biceps. When the Asgardian starts smiling Sam clenches his jaw to the point of pain, not liking you ignored him today.

“Alright. Any more questions or can Y/N and I have our lunch now?” Steve asks and Sam’s eyes widen. Thor was right! Steve tries to steal his girl.

“Sam? Are you alright?” you ask. “Do you need anything?”

“Peachy,” Sam spats and you flinch at his harsh tone. Usually he’s kind and friendly with you around but right now, he acts like a douche.

“We should talk about your suit later. It has some more specific additions the other suits do not have,” trying to talk to Sam you furrow your brows when he huffs audibly.

“If I find the time,” Sam mutters almost storming out of the room.

“What’s wrong with Sam?” Steve asks.

“He might not like the fact you and the pretty lady are going to have your meal together. Sam is a competitor in the fight for Lady Y/N’s heart,” Thor says and Steve shakes his head.

“That can’t be true…Did he still not ask you out? Seriously, it’s four months of pining by now,” Steve groans. “Even I know by now how to ask a girl out.”

“He’s nervous around me Steve. I think I should skip lunch and talk to Sam instead. Do you know where he might run off?” your voice trembles as you fear you waited to long for Sam to ask you out.

“Training hall or his room. Or he’s running to let some steam off,” Steve worriedly replies. “I think it’s for the best you talk to him. I don’t know if he’s not going to get angry at me if you don’t explain we are only friends.”

“Why are men too stupid to ask a girl out? I’m sending him signals for months by now. Hell, even Thor recognized my shameless flirting,” grumbling you cover your eyes with your hand, shaking your head.

“I recognized your beauty, my dove. If you want to reject my fellow brother you can always come to me. I will fulfill your needs with pleasure,” the Asgardian says with honesty in his eyes.

“Thor, I appreciate your offer. I mean… I really do but I like Sam…a lot. Now I should hurry and set that guy straight,” ushering toward the door you sigh again. “I gotta ask him out, I guess.”

“Go get him, tiger!” Nat chuckles watching you running out of the room.

“What does that mean, Lady Natasha?” Thor asks curiously.

“It means to get the guy…you know,” Natasha explains while Steve tries to sneak out of the room, not wanting to get involved in more drama than he already did.

“Ah, lure him into your bed. I see…interesting use of language. I will keep that in mind,” Thor nods thoughtfully.

Bursting into laughter at Thor’s serious expression Natasha can’t hold back the tears spilling out of her eyes.

“That was a good one, Blondie,” she gasps.

“Good one? I do not understand the meaning of those words but I assume you tried to make fun of me. Clint told me about your habit to do so. I’m honored Mylady for your try to make me feel like part of the team.” Thor says politely and Nat stops laughing.

Running through the hallway you try to decide where to search for Sam first.

Training hall!

Opening the door you see Bucky smashing his fists into a punching bag while Wanda throws things at Vision.

“Have you seen Sam?”

“No!” Bucky yells.

“Okay. If he comes here tell him to call me. It’s urgent.”

“Will do so!”

Walking toward Sam’s room you hear his favorite music. He’s in his room then. Taking one last deep breath you knock at his door.

“Door is open,” Sam mutters and you step in.

“Hey…can we talk, Sam?” you carefully try. “I think we should speak about a thing or two.”

“Don’t you have a date with Cap?” still pissed Sam mutters under his breath.

“Sam, I do not have a date with Steve, Thor or anyone else. Why are you too blind to see I’m trying to flirt with you since we first met? Everyone else sees I want to go out with you,” you groan, stepping closer.

“You do? I mean…seriously…you want to go out with me?” Sam smiles widely, now stepping closer to grasp for your hand.

“Sam, you are smart, funny, a goddamn avenger also hot as hell,” you blur out.

“Y/N…would you go out with me for dinner tonight?” Sam finally asks.

“Give me a wing, Wilson. I think I did not understand your question,” you tease, poking a finger into his chest.

Stepping closer he tilts his head to capture your lips in a soft kiss. His lips move with yours and you need to break it after a few moments due to the lack of oxygen.

“Best first kiss ever,” Sam mumbles.

“Well, Falcon…will you give me a wing and help me out with another kiss?”

“Anytime…”

Tags in reblog.

#marvel fanfiction #marvel masterlist #sam wilson #sam wilson x reader #falcon #falcon x reader #angst #mutual pining #sam wilson fanfiction #sam wilson x you #fluff

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mittensmorgul · 5 years

Text

9.02, Devil May Care.

Look at Dabb being as on-the-nose as possible by setting the main action of this episode in a town referred to as "Contaminated Ghost Town" in the transcript. Kinda the general state of everyone's... everything, right now, you know?

DEAN: The hell happened here? SAM: Local chemical plant sprung a leak, years ago. They evacuated three square blocks. Guess it's still contaminated. DEAN: Wait, so this whole place is poison? SAM: Yeah. DEAN shields his crotch with his hand protectively. SAM: That's not gonna help. DEAN: Doesn't hurt.

Meanwhile, Crowley's back at the bunker attempting to manipulate Kevin with half-truths. Crowley is still only interested in satisfying himself, as usual. He's now addicted to human blood, much as Sam had been addicted to demon blood once upon a time. And while he's locked up, Abaddon is busy securing the throne of Hell for herself. While Crowley had secured hell on his word and his business acumen, Abaddon intends to do so through brute force, swapping out crossroads demons for supersoldiers. But Crowley's still attempting to sow discord among the residents of the bunker.

Dean lies to Sam about killing three demons (when it was actually Sam-As-Gadreel while Dean had nearly been possessed by Abaddon... lucky Gadreel had been on hand to scare her off, too). This is ironic later in the season, in 9.11, when Dean really does kill three demons on his own as part of Cain's test. So, no joke, he really is that awesome, even if he was fibbing about killing these three particular demons.

That brings us to two painfully ironic chats I need for reference here:

DEAN: But Sam's okay? ZEKE!SAM: He was knocked unconscious. In a way he still is. Sam will not remember any of this. DEAN: So what the hell am I supposed to tell him when he comes to? ZEKE!SAM: That's why I used the knife. DEAN: Right. [he takes the knife back] Smart. ZEKE!SAM: You are troubled, still. DEAN: Yeah, it's just that, uh... this is on me. I was the one who talked Sam out of boarding up Hell. Okay? So every demon deal, every kill that they make... well, you're looking at the person who let it happen. ZEKE!SAM: You were protecting your brother. I am in Sam's head. Everything he knows, I know. And I know that what you did, you did out of love. DEAN: Yeah, uh, look, Zeke—I'm gonna call you Zeke—I'm not really with the whole, uh, love, and... love. ZEKE!SAM: But it is why I said yes. DEAN: Yeah, and if that goes sideways, that's on me too. ZEKE!SAM: That's not going to happen. DEAN: This is nuts. I mean, you're Sam, but you're not Sam, and normally he's the one I'm talking to about all this stuff. I'm trusting you, Zeke. I just gotta hope that you're one of the good guys. ZEKE!SAM: I am. (beat) But I suppose that is what a bad guy would say. (beat) Dean Winchester, you are doing the right thing.

Let's take a moment to focus on that line, "But it is why I said yes." Gadreel KNOWS he is using Sam's face to say these words. GADREEL didn't say yes, SAM did. But Gadreel is clearly using Sam's face to manipulate Dean, implying that Sam actually said yes out of love for Dean (which... I mean, Gadreel did tap into that when he was prodding around in Sam's mind, which is how he knew to use that angle and DEAN'S FACE to manipulate Sam into saying yes... basically Gadreel is the manipulator who gets both sides of the deal here, and instead of helping Sam and Dean come to an understanding, he literally uses that to divide and conquer... using their own codependency against both of them for his own gain. Yes, he has his reasons, after having been wrongfully locked in prison since the dawn of humanity, because he himself had been manipulated this way, and he will later fall under Metatron's manipulative sway, too... but yiiiikes, he's unwittingly the source of so much of the toxic drama of s9.)

And then Dean gives Kevin the speech we all wish he'd given Cas in 9.03, but of course he's blackmailed out of it by Gadreel...

DEAN: Crowley's lying. KEVIN: And if he's not? DEAN: Well... if she is alive, then she's dead. In every way that matters, she's dead, Kevin, I'm sorry. I know you're dying to bolt, man. I get it. But out that door, it's demons, and it's angels, and they would all love to get their hands on a prophet. So even with Crowley here, this is still the safest place for you. It just is. And we need you, man. KEVIN: Because I'm useful. DEAN: Because you're family. (beat) After all the crap we've been through, after all the good that you've done... man, if you don't think that we would die for you... I don't know what to tell you. [KEVIN starts crying] Because you, me, Sam and Cas, we are all we've got. But hey, if none of that matters to you, then I won't stop you.

But "usefulness" versus "no man we're FAMILY and we actually love you regardless" will be Dean and Cas's ongoing issue right through the end of s14, so we still have a long, difficult slog through that particular issue...

#spn 9.02 #s14 hellatus rewatch #spiders georg of the tnt loop #breaking the codependency #the scheherazade of supernatural #it's spirals all the way down #lies and damn lies

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dangan-your-ronpa-imagines-blog · 6 years

Text

V3 Boys First Kiss Headcanon Part 1

I’m going to divide this ask into two parts because it’s honestly kinda long and for the moments I don’t really have anything for the other boys left.

Also, I’m not really sure if I made this like a headcanon or an imagine, so yeah that’s that. Hope you enjoy this part and I’ll try to post part two soon!

- Mod Kaede

Shuichi Saihara

Oh, he is SO not ready for this!

To say Saihara was nervous would be an understatement.

He’s never kissed anyone before! What if he messes up the kiss and you break up with him?!

No no, Saihara. You’re being inrrational…

It could still happen though.

He never read any romance books before either, so he didn’t exactly know how to put the whole… Romantic scenerie. He even asked some of his friends for help, namely Kaede and Kaito, his two ‘hopeless romantic’ friends, as the others so nicely put it. He also asked Amami since he seemed to know one or two things about romanticism.

“Awww, Shuichi! That’s so sweet! But just be yourself and everything will go fine!” “Haha! You called the right guy for the job, Shuichi! Kaito Momota, Luminary of the Stars, is a master of romaticism, after all!” “Ah, I’m sure I can give you a few tips on how not to mess it up... I’m kidding, I’m kidding! Just don’t worry too much and you’ll be fine, you have your own charms.”

Yeah he kind of regretted have called them all at once, but they were kind of useful, a few more than others, actually...

After everything was done, he called you to get ready because he was going to take you to a nice dinner night at a fancy restaurant. Wow!

He came to pick you up and he was lookng more... anxious tan usual. His hands were also sweaty… More sweaty.

You guys got to the restaurant and ate a satisfying meal, Saihara kept on stuttering and blushing and it got to a point where you couldn’t even understand him anymore, he said he was fine though.

After dinner you guys went on a nice walk on the park, it was getting kind of cold so Saihara offered you his jacket which you gladly accepted.

More time passed and you guys decided to call it a day and he escorted you back home.

Once at your front door you held his hands and started to say how lovely the night was, Saihara couldn’t help but stare at your lips for a little. They looked so soft, they probably are...

It was time? I mean, it looked like the perfect time to do it, right? Oh, he could hear Kaede, Kaito and Amami chanting “do it, do it, do it” in the distance…

He leaned a bit closer, mustering up the courage to finally kiss you- but he chickened up. He wasn’t ready to do it. He’s not man enough to take the first step. He could already feel his three friends scolding him, mostly Kaito.

But as if reading his mind, you suddenly leaned closer to him and-

G a s p!

“It was lovely night, Shuichi! I hope we can repeat it soon!” And you closed the door.

Saihara was struck into silence, just staring at the door, eyes wide open, face glowing red. He couldn’t believe it! You kissed him! And- It, it felt really good, too…

...he would like to repeat that…

Kaito Momota

Oh, he is SO ready for this!

He has the whole night planned out! It was a perfect night!

Training, then eat some snacks, then training again, and then stargazing!

Heh, nailed it.

You’ve been dating for one month now and Kaito doesn’t even know how could he managed not to kiss you on the lips for so long!

But today was the day! You finally will get to kiss an amazing astronaut such as himself, the great Kaito Momota, Luminary of the Stars!

He’s going to impress you by doing One. Hundred. Push-ups! Isn’t that cool?!

You’re gonna be so impressed! And to top it all off, he’s going to Kiss you! And no, not on the cheek or the forehead, kiss you on the lips! And it’s gonna be the most perfectly smooth best kiss you’ll ever had!

His exact words.

This night is gonna be the best night of your life, with the best boyfriend you ever had, and with the best kiss as the cherry on top.

Or so he thinks.

Or so he thought.

When the night strikes, he calls you over to do your daily workout rutine.

And his fool-proof plan is set in motion.

Unfortunately, you can’t make a fool-proof plan if it’s made by a fool.

Instead of one hundred push-ups, or even his normally fifty push-ups, he does twenty because in the middle of it he felt exhausted, got a cramp, and lied there on the grass of his backyard while telling you to keep doing your push-ups whilst feeling ashamed of himself.

And when it was time for the snacks, he went to open the bag of chips only to accidentaly rip it open and make all the chips fall to the ground.

R.I.P Chips. You will be missed

And when the second training session begun, this time with sit-ups, he literally couldn’t even do one because he got a cramp on his leg.

So the night was going great.

But do not fret for our little astronaut! For it was time to do the one thing he couldn’t fail at.

S t a r g a z i n g!

It was also the last part of his ‘plan to give S/O the best kiss of their life and be the best boyfriend in the world’, so he had to do this one right!

With you sitting beside him, and the starry night sky above your heads, he knew it was the moment. Now or never!

“Hey, S/O, look at me for a sec.” he caught your attention. “Yeah? What is it, Kaito?”

You both were now face-to-face with each other. Your beautiful eyes staring at his. He moved closer, trying to keep on a straight face and maintain serious and compose. Trying but failing to keep his nerves in check, then - in a fit of energy - instead of going in for the kiss smoothly, like in the movies, he makes you butt heads- foreheads more likely. Really hard.

In the end of the day, you and Kaito ended up sitting on the sofá with icepacks pressed on your foreheads.

Sadly for the hopeless romantic known as Kaito, he didn’t actually got to kiss you - unless you can count bumping foreheads as a kiss - but there’s always a second time to try it! ...or a third time..

Rantaro Amami

Yeah, he’s chill.

I mean, he’s Rantaro “The Suave” Amami, the coolheaded, and charming yet cryptic boy who is desired for many girls and boys alike, what did you expect him to be?

What, did you expected him to be all stressed out and having inside fits of rage because he can’t kiss you because everytime he tries to some unexplainable thing happens that just completely kills off the whole mood he created to make his first kiss with you the best for the both of you? Pfft, as if.

….

Okay, maaaybe there is a tiny chance of him being a little, widdle bit mad by the apparent bad luck around your romatic moments. But he won’t let it show its face!

...In front of you, that is.

He just really wants to kiss you, and he knows you want to kiss him too- you said it once out of frustation after Ouma interrupted the pair of you by spilling panta on you!

Luckily, there is one person Amami can let all his frustations out with, aside from you, and that person is his bestie that knows how to talk about feelings without being cryptic about it or mentioning a dead relative- Kaede! His first and most trustworthy friend, the one who tried to befriend him when the others didn’t know how to approach him and his cryptics and shady words.

Also the one who sometimes helps him make the romantic scenery.

Kaede is well aware of Amami’s attempts to kiss you, and of said attempts being interrupted by the recurrent classmate appearing at the wrong time, or the current troubles a white-haired upperclassman’s luck causes.

So she has a plan to make you both finally kiss with no interruptions!

It’s very simple, really. But hey, it could still work and at this point, you’ll try anything!

It all happens at school, before the last period.

Kaede guides you and Amami to her research lab, once there you saw how Kaede had made everything look like a scene straight rip-off an old, cheesy movie.

“Alright! If you stay here while everyone else is in class, that’ll give you some privacy. I’ll also lock the door and make up some excuse for you guys so you won’t have to worry about anyone coming in and ruining the moment. You’ll be able to be all romantic and lovey-dovey! So wait here ‘til I come back, and once I’m back I wanna hear that you two finally kissed, okay?!”

Then she puts everyone’s favorite Clair de lune by Debussy on the disc player before promptly leaving and locking the door, and leaving two lovebirds midly confused.

“..I like it that she wants to help but... maybe she didn’t needed to lock the door,” “Hey, you never know anymore. With our luck, even Koichi could come through that door to drink, get wasted, and escape from his students.” “Haha, yeah… Kaede really did put a lot of effort in this, didn’t she?” “Well, you do say she’s a hopeless romantic, ‘sides, this looks really nice.” “Yeah, really nice..”

There was a moment of silence after that, only you and Amami staring at each other’s eyes lovingly, slowly getting closer and closer to each other’s faces, until they were only inches away of each other, your lips almost touching.

This was the moment he was waiting for. A moment of peace, with no interruptions, no classmates causing ruckus and getting you two involve somehow.

Just you and Amami, enjoying each other’s company as he caresses your cheek with one hand and finally closes the gap between you.

Kokichi Ouma

Alright guys what the actual heck-

There are so many things annoying him right now.

He tries to kiss you at school, he can’t. Why? Because some blonde bitch keeps bothering him with nicknames and whatnot.

He tries to kiss you at DICE’s hideout - that he thought was a good idea to begin with -, he can’t. Why? Because DICE members keep playing pranks on him and/or you because of some prank war between them that you happened to get caught in the crossfire.

He tries to kiss you at home, he can’t. Why? Because either he gets a call from DICE to attend some issues, or you are too busy with work to pay any attention to him, which ultimately hurts him.

HE TRIES TO KISS YOU IN HIS SLEEP AND ENDS UP DROOLING ALL OVER YOUR HAIR-

So yeah, you guys are not allowed to kiss, apparently. That’s how the universe wants it, that’s how the universe’s gonna have it.

But, oh no. What’s this? The great and dreaded Kokichi Ouma will not stand this kind of insult from the universe!

He is the Ultimate Supreme Leader, he is better than the universe, he is above the universe. He will kiss you even if that creates a dark hole in the universe and destroys the Earth.

Alright honey let’s not take it that far-

He has a plan. An eerily simple plan.

Ask the DICE members to stop screwing with his attempts to kiss you if they don’t want him to dispose of all of their rubber chickens, pies, masks, beautifully fashionable scarves and Panta for eternity because honestly, he is to this of this bulshit (cockblocking, how Miu calls it), and he’s usually the one making people feel like this, not the other way around, so this is new. He won’t let you see it though.

As for the kiss, it was rather playful. Kokichi’s way.

He made you chase him through DICE’s headquarters, as though you were playing Tag, at one point you lost sight of him and when you were about to give up-

B A M!

Tackled to the ground by your little purple gremlin, who was laughing and complaining about how easy you gave up on finding him, because apparently you started to play hide-and-seek at some point.

As you were about to tell him to get off of you, he saw his chance and kissed you- so suddenly!

You were taken aback by that, but didn’t pull away. A few seconds passed and Ouma pulled away from the kiss with a classic ‘nishishi’ escaping his mouth as he got up. Taking a look at his face, he looked satisfied, relieved even.

Was he really expecting that kiss so much?

Bonus for Saihara’s one:

In the distance, hidden in some bushes, the certain friends of a certain detective are watching over him.

“Haha! I knew he’d do it! That’s my side- Wha?! He’s backing off?!”

“Oh, Shuichi… Remember our training!”

“Hm. Guess he wasn’t read- Oh?”

“Oh?!”

“Oh! I knew they’d be the one to make the move! Go Y/N!”

“Looks like someone took the initiative.”

“I gotta teach Shuichi how to not chicken up when you’re making your big move, that’s for sure. At least he got what he was aiming for, though.”

“I think our job is done, let’s call it a day?”

The three nod in agreement before being going to a suddenly-planned stargazing night, suggested by Kaito.

#mod kaede #ndrv3 #drv3 #boys #request #shuichi saihara #rantaro amami #kaito momota #kokichi ouma #fluff #imagine #headcanon #danganronpa

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pwnyta · 5 years

Text

AGE OF ULTRON BOTHERS ME OK. Like... I ENJOYED IT. I thought it was a fun romp but if I think about it beyond just watching cool fight scenes its fucking irritating.

So Im gonna give my suggestions on how to fix it so it doesnt feel like Whedon disregarded every other movie that he had no part in..

HERE GOES.

First off... this should be a movie that completely cements the Avengers as a team. Ultron should try AND FAIL to put a divide in the Avengers. Loki already broke them up and Whedon absolutely knows that Civil War is coming and its gonna happen again so THIS movie should be one where the Avengers are the most SOLID OF UNITS.

Especially Steve and Tony. Steve distrust of Tony is baseless and obnoxious... it made some sense in the first movie because Tonys attitude in public and thats all Steve got plus Lokis discourse stick adding fuel to the fire... FINE. But its shitty in this movie and makes Cap look like a fucking moronic prick... because REALLY trusting the chick that mind raped you and tried to murder you over your fucking teammate? JANKY and makes you look like an incompetent leader (though the writers would ignore that fact because theyre too scared to let Steve make mistakes... but w/e)

The one area I can see them actually arguing or disagreeing is Tony making Vision after what happens with Ultron. Tony points out hes been making AI for a long ass time without issue and Cap says its not worth it, Tony argues damned if we dont maybe not damned if we do.... scuffle happens, Vision happens, Thor pops in, Stark was right... Cap and Tony have a heart to heart because theyre friends and they make up...

At some point before Wanda and Pietro switch sides, Wanda learns that Tony wasnt the one selling weapons... maybe when Ultron is talking about him learning shit from the internet and deciding humanity should just fuck off (a fair assessment honestly) one of the things he mentions is Tony being carelessness and Stane selling weapons under the table... and it starts sinking in in that moment that shes been attacking a man who had no real part in her parents death, but then Ultrons like Im gonna kill everyone and thats when Wanda and Pietro dip out.

The scene where Clint is talking to Wanda and Pietro should be a reconciliation between them and Tony instead... maybe a conversation about how he understands how it is to be the bad guy and hurt people because of grief... were not so different you and I and all that... and it would sting even harder in Civil War when Tony once again lets his grief consume him and he lashes out at Steve and Bucky.

Wanda getting to have a heart to heart with a character shes wronged most of all and trying to be a better person by helping the fight against Ultron would humanize her more and it would give her losing her brother a lot more of a sting. I think anyways.

CLINT SHOULD HAVE SHIT TO DO. I think Ive said this before but they should have Clint have a family but absolutely not have Clint go to his family home when hes being hunted down by a homicidal fuckin robot....ya know? He brings them to a safe house, the Avengers are still a little awkward and making comments... theres pictures of Clint with his wife and kids and Nat ‘these are agents.‘ ‘...the kids?‘ ‘...smaller agents...‘... at the end of the movie when theyre victorious we see a scene where Clint goes to another home and hes greeted by his wife and kids and were like OMG THEYRE ACTUALLY REAL AND NOT JUST A COVER? IDK what else to do with Clint...

Nat and Bruce woulda been fine but they should been the main source of animosity within the Avengers. Nat manipulated and lied to Bruce to get him into SHIELDs grasp and Bruce almost killed Natasha. Though theyre civil with each other in the end it would be interesting to see their relationship start to fester when theyre in a desperate situation. Maybe they get separated from the group and are forced to confront their negativity toward each other... and dont really make up until near the end of the movie. Natasha continuously thinks she can handle a situation alone (secretly shes afraid that Bruces anger for her will cause the Hulk to lash out at her too and Thor isnt around to stop him no one is... she'd be alone) and does a pretty good job fighting off the bad guys herself, but eventually theyre cornered and Bruce says they need Hulk... and she says no and they argue and Bruce does it anyways and takes out the bots coming after them and when he turns, Nat is clearly scared like she was that first time... Hulk reaches out to her because hes not just a mindless beast and she faces and conquers her fear and they work well together.

Bruce watching Natasha keep him safe and be there for him (maybe theres a point where SHE could save herself and leave Bruce but she doesnt) and she in turn sees that Bruce/Hulk isnt something that she needs to be scared of. EXCELLENT. If they wanna hint a maybe romance after that fine... I prefer it not happen but at least theres some material to work with. Bruce takes off at the end because he still cant deal with what happened earlier in the movie with him ripping apart a city... so hes off to Ragnarok as scheduled.

Thor.......... I dunno. Like Clint its a bit hard to work with him in this movie. He can do what hes doing in the movie I guess? but like... let him have some connection... maybe hes the one who calms Hulk down since Nats not there... but instead of just talking at Hulk hes like 'hey buddy!!' and Hulks like RRAWRRRR and Thor yells at him back and is like 'LOL -PUNCH- lets get going' and Hulk is like '-huff huff- -looks angry-.....k'. IDFK. But itd be cool since Ragnarok they became buddies anyways....

Rhodey should have been in contact with the Avengers in the movie more. There is a scene where hes talking with Tony and Nat over a computer but it was cut... but they should have given him that scene and him updating the Avengers on what hes doing (finding Fury and getting SHIELDs help or w/e) and Whedon not even letting Sam come back for the finally is unforgivable..

but I guess it would really highlight the fact he sidelined the 3 black guys and only let them come in in the end.... but Sam being sent to find Bucky was a shitty way to get rid of him. But it just makes it clear the movies after the Avengers was disregarded- Whedon doesnt know what to do with Sam (whos introd in Cap2), Rhodey is back to being War Machine with no explanation(even though in IM3 hes Iron Patriot), Fury is back with SHIELD (even though SHIELD was dismantled and Fury left)...

Rhodey being Iron Patriot could have been hilarious too... and also gave Steve and Rhodey some kind of connection. Just have him land by Cap in that ridiculous suit and Cap looks at him and he looks at Cap and Tonys like 'Well one of you needs to change...' and then in Civil War when Rhodey is back to War Machine... itd be kind of hilarious. They can even have another running gag where people keep fake mistaking them as the same person and theyre like 'ALRIGHT I FUCKING GET IT' 'LANGUAGE~~'

But youd need the writers to actually care about Rhodey... AND THEY FUCKIN DONT. All of them. Theyre all to blame.

..Where was I...

Also literally ONE scene with Vision and Tony... maybe at the very end... because Tony losing his most consistent/closest confidant and only RDJ looking devastated because he seems to be the only one who cares about Tonys bots/AIs kinda sucks. I mean Whedon admitted that he didnt think JARVIS was all that important didnt he? Garbo.

...IDK what else... but you know what I mean? Im so sick of heroes fighting each other... its cool and sad every once in awhile but literally every movie doesnt have to be that.

Will anyone read my rambling nonsense? Probably not... but I have a lot of feelings. AoU and BvS ...why do you gotta suck so hard.

#Movie tag.#EwimFixIts.

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magmasliveblogs · 5 years

Text

1.12

aaaaaaaaaaand im back with the 14th chapter! irl stuff is semi dealt with so i have time for the three updates! to recap: last chapter was an interlude, where we discovered erin was summoned as part of some ritual to summon heroes. only one group was actually summoned to the ritual site, with the rest being summoned across the world. to recap the last actual chapter, erin saved pisces from execution by withdrawing her testimony of him being a [necromancer]

Erin woke up. Generally this was an ordeal. Today however, it was fairly easy. Because the real ordeal would come later.

Such as right after breakfast. Erin stared glumly at the three shriveled blue fruits on her plate. She bit the first experimentally and chewed. And chewed. And chewed.

“Rubbery.”

It was incredibly difficult to chew the fruits. The skin on these ones were so tough to bite into, it did remind Erin of eating rubber. Not that she’d ever done that since she was a baby.

Plus, they’d lost their delicious juices and tasted—well, flat. There was no sweetness left in them, and they were quite, quite unappetizing when you put all these qualities together. But Erin ate them, mainly because she had nothing left to eat.

“I’m in trouble. Yup, yup.”

It wasn’t that she was out of blue fruits. There were plenty—well, some—still ready to be harvested from the orchard. But they, like all food, were in limited supply. Besides, the issue wasn’t that. It was her guests.

“Who’d want to eat blue fruits all day? Raise your hand if that sounds like fun.”

Erin didn’t raise her hand. Granted, they were tasty and made a good fruit drink, but when you got down to it, they were still just fruits.

“And I want food. Real food. Not fruit. I want bread! I want pasta! I want pizza and soda and salad and ice cream—actually forget the ice cream. I need meat. Or fish that doesn’t bite back! I want sushi, cheeseburgers and fries, toast, waffles…cereal…”

Erin pressed her hands to her rumbling stomach and tried not to cry.

“Even instant ramen would be nice. Is that too much to ask?”

It was. She knew that. But just thinking about the food made her tear up a bit. She could handle Goblins. She could deal with rude Necromancers and fight off evil rock-crabs. She could even handle giant fish that tried to nibble on her when she took a bath. But she wanted food.

“Plus, I need to feed my guests.”

Erin nodded. The math was simple. No food = no guests = no money = starvation. But the little flaw in the equation was that in order to get the food, she’d need to spend the money. And she had no way of doing that.

“Unless I go to the city.”

finally! we are going to the city! its been so long since she initially noticed it!

Now, that was a thought. She wasn’t sure if that was a good thought, but it was the only option she had available. The city. Erin went to the window. Relc had shown her where it was…

“There.”

Erin stared at the small buildings in the distance. It looked far. But then, everything looked far around here. And the city would have things. Like food. And clothing. And toothbrushes. Still, Erin didn’t want to go.

“It’s far. But I have to go. Maybe? Yes…no. No? Yes. I need food. And I need to feed my guests. It’s my duty as an innkeeper.”

She paused and thought about that last statement. Erin collapsed into a chair and cradled her head in her hands.

“Am I an innkeeper? Is that what this world is doing to me?”

Maybe. It was probably the [Innkeeper] class.

“Soon I’ll grow a huge beer belly and start hauling around kegs of ale. That’s what innkeepers do, right?”

She didn’t actually know. It wasn’t as if she’d ever paid that much attention to medieval history, at least the parts that were actually history.

“They never mentioned innkeepers in the legend of King Arthur. Or did they?”

There was no Google to help her so Erin abandoned that train of thought. Really, she was distracting herself. The problem she was facing was simple.

“To go to the city or not, that is the question. Actually, there’s no question. I need to go to the city. I need to go…shopping.”

Shopping. It would be a lot more appealing if she wasn’t trying to buy things to survive. But it had to be done. She knew it.

Still. Erin really, really didn’t like that idea. She liked people, she really did. But she had a negative reaction to A: leaving her safe inn, and B: travelling to a far off city probably full of giant lizards and insects that walked on two feet.

erin. its the difference between being uncomfortable and being dead. i know that being alive is much better than being dead

Glumly, she stared at the three sticky blue fruit cores on her plate. She walked outside and threw them as far as she could. The juices left her hands feeling unpleasantly sticky, but there wasn’t much she could do about it.

“Guess I’ve gotta go to the stream. Who knew washing your hands was so much work?”

Erin grumbled as she wiped her hand on her jeans. Then she paused. And looked down.

Her jeans were blue. The blue fruit juice was blue. But against all odds, the blue stain still showed up quite visibly on her clothing. Or rather, the blue fruit stains. And they weren’t just on her pants.

Erin’s shirt was a nice, commercial t-shirt with a lovely company logo on the front and back. Really, she wasn’t that attached to it, but it was perfect to wear when she was just staying at home. It wasn’t her choice of clothing.

…Which was good, because Erin would have cried if she’d inflicted the same damage on a t-shirt she really liked. She gazed down at the blue stains covering her shirt. She poked at the rips and cuts on the sleeves and the burn marks on one side. She lifted the shirt, sniffed once, and gagged.

For the first time Erin felt at her hair. She raised a hand and smelled her breath. She thought about the last time she’d brushed her teeth, taken a bath, or even used soap. Then she tried to shut down her mind.

“Well, that settles that. I’m off to the city.”

good that we are finally going, but i do find it kinda funny that its her hygiene thats the last straw

Erin walked through the grass. She wished there was a nice road to follow, but for some reason no one bothered to pave a road through the empty wilderness. Come to that, she wondered again why anyone would build an inn in the middle of nowhere.

Maybe there used to be more people in the area. Or maybe there was just an idiot who thought he was breaking into an untapped market. Either way, Erin was grateful for the inn.

“But why does it have to be so far away from anything?”

Erin walked down the slope. At least there was that. The inn was located on an incline. Not a steep hill, but a really long slope that gradually went down the more she walked. It was nice, until Erin looked back and realized she’d be climbing up all that way again soon.

“Wow. That’s a big hill.”

She stared for a while and kept walking. Relc and Klbkch had called the journey to the city a walk of about twenty minutes.

“They lied to me.”

Or maybe they just walked really fast. Erin could actually see the city Klbkch had called Liscor in the distance. It was still small, but given how close it seemed now compared to before and multiplying her velocity by her legs and given energy divided by her willingness to keep walking…

“Thirty minutes. No; probably an hour. Yeah, that sounds about right.”

Erin sighed. But exercise was good for her, right? It built character. Or something.

perhaps the guards have movement/speed related skills? or are they just taller/have longer strides

“So, what do I need?”

She took a quick inventory check. Her coins were securely packed into the bottom of one pocket. They were heavy. She had her clothes on, which was important, and she looked like…well, like a homeless person. But she had money. So what should she buy with it?

“Um. Clothing. Right. And soap. And a toothbrush, if they have toothbrushes. And toothpaste…which they probably don’t have. But something. And I need food obviously, soap, towels, laundry deter—more soap, and a comb.”

Erin walked a few more feet.

“And a sword. I need a sword. And a shield? And armor? And uh, anti-Goblin spray? Oh, and books! Tons of books. Maps, history books…can I read any of that? Well, Relc and Klbkch speak English. So that’s weird too. And I need bandages, a sewing needle, someone to teach me how to sew…”

Erin felt at her pocket. The coins jingled. She wished there were more to jingle.

“And I need to rob a bank.”

Okay. Erin retraced her thoughts.

“What’s essential?”

She counted off on her fingers.

“Clothing. Food. Toothbrush. Soap. And a lamp.”

She snapped her fingers.

“Right. A lamp! And a sword.”

She felt at her pocket.

“…Just the lamp.”

you are not rich erin, you cant afford a sword and all that stuff.

Flat grass, flat grass, all I see is flat grass.”

Erin sang as she walked. She wasn’t sure if there was a tune, but at least the singing kept her company.

“Horses eat grass, but I’ll pass, so I’ll go to the city fast. Or I’ll die of starvation! And once I’m there I’ll eat ten pears and—hey, is that a Goblin?”

Erin turned her head suddenly and the small head ducked down. She squinted. Yes, that was definitely a Goblin. It was hiding up on a small hill to her left, but she knew it was still there. Watching her.

Well. She was being followed. Erin wasn’t sure what to make of that. She looked around and two more heads disappeared as their owners dove for cover. They didn’t look like they were trying to ambush her, just follow her.

“Hm.”

Erin bent down and searched the grass. Eventually she found what she was looking for. She waited until one of the Goblins decided she’d forgotten about them and poked his head up again. Then she turned and shouted.

“Shoo!”

Erin hurled the rock. It missed the Goblin’s head. And the hill. But the green midget took the hint and disappeared in an instant. Erin sighed to herself.

“Great. They’re like cockroaches. Evil, giant, green cockroaches. With teeth. And sharp knives. And red eyes.”

She wondered what she should do. Then she thought about what she could actually do.

Erin kept walking.

The city kept getting larger the further she walked. She felt at some point it should stop getting bigger, but soon the buildings loomed in her vision. They were no skyscrapers, but they were taller than she felt medieval buildings should be. But the city was still far away. So she walked.

And she was being watched. Multiple pairs of eyes stared at the young woman as she walked through the grass. They watched her for signs of weakness, for things that could be exploited. She was watched. Occasionally she turned around and threw a stone.

goblins! goblins are watching!

When Erin got to the city gates she stared up for a while.

“That’s a big wall.”

It was a big understatement. The wall was high. And that was high even by wall standards. It was nearly forty feet tall, which Erin had no way of knowing was perfectly normal for a wall. She had no way of knowing it was forty feet tall either. She just thought it was big.

But what was unusual about this particular wall, and what Erin did notice was the way the gate was constructed. It was no iron grating of a portcullis with handy holes to shoot and poke at enemies, but two solid metal doors. Erin wondered why, as the gates looked solid and hard to budge. They were, and for a reason. But she didn’t find out that reason until much later.

hmm, large plains, solid doors, everything is built on hills. does this area flood often?

Erin approached the gate. There wasn’t really anyone else going through at the moment, so she felt very alone and small as she walked up to them. She stopped when she saw the guard.

He was big. He was armored. He was also a Drake, and he had yellow scales rather than green ones. Pale yellow, so Erin was reminded of popcorn. He also had a curved sword, and so it was with trepidation that she approached.

“…Hi.”

The Drake flicked his eyes down towards Erin and then resumed looking off into the distance. He was holding a spear at his side and a metal buckler on his left arm. Since he wasn’t using either to bash her to death, Erin considered this to be a good first start.

“Um. Nice weather, isn’t it?”

Again, the guard glanced at her. Again, he didn’t respond.

“…Right. It’s just that I’m new here. And I’m Human. Nice to meet you. My name is Erin. I uh, know another guy who works with you. Relc? And Klb…Klb…the insect guy? So yeah. They know me. I’m no threat. And uh, I saw some Goblins running around a while back. They’re not here right now, but I felt you should know.”

The Drake sighed audibly. And loudly.

just, ugh. i would normally skip this interaction because i dont like awkward scenes like this, but its very short

“Go on in, Human. Anyone can enter the city.”

“Right. Thanks. Uh, have a nice day!”

Erin smiled. He didn’t smile back.

“I’ll just be going. Now.”

She walked past the guard. As she walked through the iron gates she heard him mutter under his breath.

“Humans.”

see?

Erin’s smile froze a bit on her face but she kept walking as if she’d heard nothing. Everyone was grumpy when they had to stand and deal with obnoxious tourists. And besides, he was just a guard. She walked through the imposing gates into the city. And then she had to stop.

Because she had entered Liscor. A city of the fiery Drakes, built with the help of the industrious Antinium. Home to the prideful Gnolls and the occasional Beastkin, not to be confused with one another. Visited by many races, home to countless more. And now entering—

One human.

oo gnolls! that means dog/hyena people, yes? also beast kin! this probably mean other animal people.

also, this is the end of the chapter! will erin experience a good bit of racism? is there a reason humans arent that common in the area? are these plains flood plains?

see you on the next post! ive got to eat so after that i shall post the next two chapters

#chrono

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lemon-writings · 5 years

Text

Playlist: Zamsel

This playlist is for my son character Zach Amsel (Zamsel) from my book WADAA. He’s one of the few characters that gets their own playlist, especially in WADAA. It’s difficult to give characters like Kam playlists, but it’s easy to curate a collection of songs for Zamsel.

He’s a relatively sad guy, but it’s fair, all things considered. Poor guy has some severe anxiety and a toxic relationship with his girlfriend, Chai. A lot of the songs are New Medicine, which I think of as Chai’s band. It’s also one of the gosh dang saddest playlists I’ve made within the past couple years. Like, wow, buddy. You’re really sad. I wonder who did that to you.

This playlist is continuously growing, so I’ll probably update it from time to time.

Bad Habit - Ben Platt

You always said that I'd come back to you again / 'Cause everybody needs a friend, it's true / Someone to quiet the voices in my head / Make 'em sing to me instead, it's you

Hate to say that I love you / Hate to say that I need you / Hate to say that I want you / But I do

You make me feel like I'm floatin' off the ground / Above this little town, you do / Look at me smile with tears in my eyes / I love the way you lie, I do

Like A Rose - New Medicine

You better pray she took her morning medication / Or you might have to pick her up at the police station / 'Cause if there's trouble in this town, you know she's gonna find it / She's like the devil in a short skirt but I don't mind it / Everybody thinks I'm crazy, but they don't even know

She got jagged edges and a dirty mouth, what a lady / And she got everything that I don't wanna live without / She's kinda like a rose / She's kinda like a rose / She's kinda like a rose and you might wanna run / 'Cuz even when she's cold, she's burnin' like the sun / The bitch is rock n roll, and let me tell you, son / Don't care if you don't like her / I love her, I love her

Broken Girl - New Medicine

I wish I didn't know you, I wish I didn't care / I shoulda known that we were never going anywhere / I shoulda lied a little, I shoulda cheated too / I guess you only want to love someone who hurts you

Yeah, you're always calling me at 3:00 A.M / Drunk and lonely, here we go again

Hey, you're begging me to stay / And know just what to say / I gotta get away, you're just a broken girl / Oh, your body's saying "go", you're naked on the floor / Don't love me anymore, you're just another broken girl

I wish that I could fix you, I know I never could / Maybe you're just afraid of anything that's any good / You say you think about me, but you see other guys / Sometimes I guess I feel like loving you is suicide / Still there's somethin' I just can't resist / I guess that's how it always comes to this

Dead Love Song - New Medicine

I didn't wanna break you down / I sacrificed myself, my conscious wouldn't let me out / Oh, there's the cage I'm in / Poison dropping on my skin / Goodbye's hanging on my tongue / And I know I'll die if I don't run

I only got one thing on my mind / Nothing's gonna stop me, not this time / Wasted way too long, living in the lines of a dead love song / I've been afraid to let you know / I've been afraid to let you go, I've been afraid

Heart With Your Name On It - New Medicine

Goddamn, you treat me like shit / But I keep coming back for more / I'm so over it, but I just can't run / 'Cause just when I think I've had enough of your suicidal love / Well, you always suck me in

It's like the more fucked up shit you do, the more I'm into you / And I just can't say goodbye

Breaking up was my idea, so why do I feel so low? / You know that I tried like hell to forget you / I'm lying in someone else's bed, but you're all up in my head / Like there's no escaping you

Boy Like Me - New Medicine

She's the only girl I see / She don't wanna be with a boy like me

She's the kinda girl that you can never please / She don't even really wanna talk to me

I don't wanna live another day like this / In a world where she don't even know that I exist

Self Esteem - The Offspring

But she came over, I lost my nerve / I took her back and made her dessert / Now I know I'm being used / That's okay, man, 'cause I like the abuse / I know she's playing with me / That's okay 'cause I've got no self-esteem

When she's saying, oh, that I'm like a disease / Then I wonder how much more I can spend / Well, I guess I should stick up for myself / But I really think it's better this way / The more you suffer / The more it shows you really care / Right? Yeah, yeah, yeah

Late at night, she knocks on my door / She's drunk again and looking to score / Now I know I should say no / But it's kind of hard when she's ready to go / I may be dumb, but I'm not a dweeb / I'm just a sucker with no self-esteem

Sex in the City - Hobo Johnson

Sex in the city / Probably feels really really nice / With hands placed on faces and twinkles in their eyes / Sex in the city / Probably looks really really great with / A girl that's like a ten and a guy that's 'bout an eight / Sex in the city / Sounds like it takes place on stage / Both moaning in key while Marvin Gaye sings / Sex in the city / Candles smell like great jobs and promising careers / My candles smell like fear my roommates may hear

I have really bad b-acne / It looks like the gosh-dang night sky / And I promise I'm gonna get it taken care of

Peach Scone - Hobo Johnson

And I love the thought of being with you / Or maybe it’s the thought of not being so alone! / Hey, the second one’s way sadder than the first one / But I don’t know

Shit, I love being—I love being loved, but / Don't like crying on the phone

And if you find someone who loves you for who you are / Keep loving 'em, man / 'Cause that shit happens like, once in a lifetime, y'know? / And who am I to get in the way of someone living their lifetime, Y'know?

House of Gold - Twenty One Pilots

She asked me, "Son, when I grow old / Will you buy me a house of gold / And when your father turns to stone / Will you take care of me?" / I will make you queen of everything you see / I'll put you on the map / I'll cure you of disease

Let's say we up and left this town / And turned our future upside down / We'll make pretend that you and me / Lived ever after happily

And since we know that dreams are dead / And life turns plans up on their head / I will plan to be a bum / So I just might become someone

Twin Size Mattress - The Front Bottoms

It’s no big surprise you turned out this way / When they closed their eyes and prayed you would change / And they cut your hair, and sent you away / You stopped by my house the night you escaped / With tears in my eyes, I begged you to stay / You said “Hey man, I love you, but no fucking way”

This is for the lake that me and my friends swim in / Naked and dumb on a drunken night / And it should've felt good, but I could hear the Jaws theme song / On repeat in the back of my mind / Make sure you kiss your knuckles before you punch me in the face / There are lessons to be learned / Consequences for all the stupid things I say / And it is no big surprise you turned out this way / The spark in your eyes, the look on your face, I will not be brave

She hopes I’m cursed forever / To sleep on a twin-sized mattress / In somebody’s attic or basement my whole life / Never graduating up in size to add another / And my nightmares will have nightmares every night / Oh, every night, every night

Relapse - Divided By Friday

I don’t wanna be somebody falling into relapse / Every time I see that smile again / I just think of when you said “I love you / But I don’t think I can be the one.”

Did you forget that we said “I’m never gonna leave you / Always gonna keep you right here next to me?” / So why am I the only one; the lonely part of “we?”

Colors - Halsey

You were red, and you liked me because I was blue / But you touched me, and suddenly I was a lilac sky / Then you decided purple just wasn't for you

Ease My Mind - Ben Platt

Most days, I wake up with a pit in my chest / There are thoughts that I can't put to rest / There's a worry that I can't place / Most nights, I am restless and quiet won't come / So I lay there and wait for the sun / There's a trouble that won't show its face

Darling, only you can ease my mind / Help me leave these lonely thoughts behind / When they pull me under, and I can feel my sanity start to unwind / Darling, only you can ease my mind

Peach - The Front Bottoms

One day, you will find someone / Who will love you like you deserve / But tonight, I'm the only one left / And I'm betting it's a fact that you will never learn

You say I'm gonna miss you when you leave / And you are probably right

You say I should think before I talk / You say I shouldn't think about my life

Archive - Mal Blum

And so I spent the winter bundled up / Pretending I was sane / And giving up / The things I love the most / Because they felt like pain

And I lied to all my friends, said I was happy when I wasn't / And you lied to all yourselves / Said I could give you what you wanted / But it all feels so much bigger than / Some blame-filled, lonely break up

#playlist #spotify playlist #noveling playlist #zamsel #tw: abusive relationships #tw: drug use

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alexistitania · 6 years

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TOKYO GHOUL ENDED AND I AM EMOTIONAL

Like, it legitimately ended. That’s it. No Part 3. I mean there IS material for potential Part 3 but this is the definitive closure to the story.

AND GUESS WHAT? IT AIN’T A TRAGEDY?!

I know people are always gonna be divided on this, like I’m seeing actual hate in the tag, and I guess that’s to be expected, this always happens when a popular series is ending. But I don’t think this particular ending deserves so much hate, and hopefully there are more people who are happy with it. Personally, I will FOREVER be thankful for this chapter! It’s not perfect, but then again, no ending is. Yes, it could’ve wrapped up more loose ends, but I think it did enough. What’s more important is that it’s not bad (in MY opinion ok chill thanks). No, it’s SO far from bad! For me, it’s an overall GREAT ending, more or less along the lines of how I always imagined TG ending. I just never really believed it WOULD end this way, like I was legit afraid Ishida would go for the tragedy thing instead, but hey, thanks anime gods!

I think most people expected a tragic ending with Kaneki dying and everything being hopeless or bittersweet at most, but we actually got an extremely pure and happy chapter, with a neat bow on top, and I for one am LOVING it! Because I’ve been following TG since 2014, and I’ve wanted a happy ending for Kaneki and all of these characters for so long, and now I’m finally getting the payoff for all those years of suffering, don’t TOUCH ME I AM FRAGILE!

It still feels kinda weird though, seeing genuinely happy things happen in this manga, it’s like a dream I never thought would come true, but it did! Obviously, you can’t please everyone, and there will always be people who will hate this ending because they envisioned it differently, but I think at the very least the ending shouldn’t ruin the rest of the story, for anyone! Of course, people will have to take some time to recover before they decide exactly how they feel about the series after its ending, but I mean, we all stayed for the ride, didn’t we? And although this final arc - for whatever reason - felt rushed toward the end and stuff, I think Ishida made the most out of the final chapter, considering where the previous chapter left off!

So we have TSC instead of CCG now, and good riddance, I hated that organization lol, although I loved a lot of the characters who were a part of it. I really like how it’s emphasized in this chapter that nothing is really over yet, the fight still continues. The difference is that there’s a new enemy of both humans and ghouls now. As expected, for the two species to finally coexist, a mutual enemy was necessary. But even though a lot of ghouls are now living peacefully with humans, thanks to the two races’ joint effort, it’s not like everyone is willing to make peace. Speaking of peace, I like how we have the title “peacekeepers” now instead of investigators (it reminds me of one of the home worlds from the Spyro the Dragon game, but that’s just my own nostalgia speaking), although it’s just in Tokyo, because apparently, other branches of CCG are still active and fighting the ghouls that are disrupting the peace. Hopefully the investigators have a new policy now, and they don’t attack friendly ghouls nowadays. Of course, there are always gonna be bad feelings from both sides, but hopefully the hostility isn’t as strong anymore. I actually wish the chapter had gone into a bit more depth and explained the nature of an investigator’s job in this new world, since some of the characters we know stayed investigators, but oh well.

Basically, both species have obviously made incredible progress in the past six years, but it’s not all flowers and rainbows, not EVERYONE is happy with this new world. And that’s so very like real life. What I think is great about this chapter is how it builds this new society as broadly as possible, and tries to explain as much as possible from different angles, because so many things have changed, it’s practically entirely new worldbuilding. It’s surely only a glimpse of what this new world looks like, but I believe it’s as detailed as the 30-page format allows. And I actually LIKE how we aren’t given everything, I feel like that’s very much Ishida’s style, leaving some things open. Because, nothing is really concluded, this fictional world didn’t just magically reach Nirvana, nor did it completely crumble down; it’s just transformed, it’s still transforming, PANTA RHEI MY DUDES! The overall theme of this chapter goes perfectly with the message of Kaneki’s speeches about the world and the never-ending change. I just really, REALLY like how the chapter emphasizes that constant change. And I like how you get this sense of cause & consequence from the chapter, as it’s made very clear that, while the Dragon war was definitely horrible, it actually allowed for new technologies to develop, which ultimately led to a better world, a changed world. We’re definitely meant to see this chapter as a closure, or actually more of an afterword, but we’re also urged to realize this is not the end of the story; the story goes on, and we were only shown a fragment of it. Like, that’s real poetic stuff right there my man.

Now, I also have a few things to say about some of the characters featured in the chapter. There are so many, I can’t even remember half of what was said about most of them, although I reread the chapter three times. It’s just extremely text-heavy. So I’ll just list the things that were important to me personally, mostly the things concerning the main characters. Otherwise, this post would get waaaay too long.

We actually got these little notes about pretty much every character I can think of (man this manga has so many CHARACTERS), telling us what all of them have been up to during the six-year timeskip. My only real complaint is that there was no mention of Eto, even though the previous chapter didn’t really bother to explain what exactly happened to her. It would’ve been fine if she’d never even come back at all, but this way, it kinda feels like the author just forgot to mention her lol. Maybe I’m just reading too much into it, it’s probably just that when the Dragon died, so did she. I was also hoping for a Rize mention, since she was such an important figure in Kaneki’s life, but at least we got a mention of the Washuu clan. And that was actually really sad, but it’s a fitting outcome, the main branch going extinct. Because first Furuta died, and then Rize shortly after, although her destiny had already been sealed much earlier. The fate of these two, and especially Rize, foreshadowed this outcome; Rize & Furuta equals Washuu inside the narrative, and when they disappeared, the Washuu they symbolized had to disappear as well.

Ok, I lied, I have another real complaint, and it actually bugged me much more than the lack of Eto mention. And that is, we only got a cameo of Akira and Amon, and no textual explanation of what was going on with them. We actually didn’t even see their faces, when literally 384576 other minor characters made an appearance. Like, they’re super major characters, what’s up with that? I guess we’re just supposed to assume they got married and lived happily ever after, but other than that, what else? Like what do they even do these days? Even just one sentence for both of them would’ve sufficed, and I really hope it’s included in the volume version of the chapter. Like, it didn’t really ruin the chapter for me, but I kinda felt like I was left hanging. And they deserved to have their faces shown one last time for closure, why all the mystery? They were both pretty important in the final arc too. Maybe we’ll get an omake about them in the final volume, who knows, but they still should’ve been shown in the last chapter. Well, I’ll admit it IS kinda poetic how we only see their backs and how it’s implied they live peacefully nowadays, and this closure IS kinda fitting for them, but still, I’m a little salty. Another thing I felt was missing was a note about Touka. I was really looking forward to learning where she ended up, other than being a mother and a wife. I mean, it’s still amazing that she was blessed enough to be able to have a normal life with her family, but the girl also wanted to do things. So yeah, it’s another thing that I hope will be added in the volume version.

Other than that.... I think pretty much everyone else was mentioned, but then again, I am not a machine and I’m pretty sure I’m forgetting a lot of characters already, so I’ll just talk about what really made me happy personally. I really liked how the narrator of this chapter was Hide, it allowed for a kind of outside look at the very end of the story. It wouldn’t be the same if it were Kaneki who was narrating, and anyway, having slept for weeks, he wouldn’t even be able to tell us the full story of the events that took place right after the Dragon war. Hide was the perfect choice for the narrator, because he’s so involved with everyone and everything. We even got Hide’s very summarized backstory, and although I believe he deserved to be exposed more thoroughly much earlier, I’m thankful Ishida didn’t completely forget about it, and that he told us basically all we needed to know. It would’ve been nice to know more, since Hide is one of the main characters, he could’ve been given a more meaningful backstory, but as it stands now, it seems that his story isn’t really crucial to his character or the series overall, so I guess I’ll take it. One thing that made me extremely happy about Hide’s ending is that he’s literally travelling and changing the world, he’s like some kind of hero history books will talk about. That’s the ending Hide deserved! And DAMN, he deserved to stay Kaneki’s friend for the rest of his life! They’re finally together, and together they’ll stay, and my heart is so full right now! Oh and another thing. I’m pretty sure the part of the translation where it says Hide was adopted by fatherS was just a typo or a mistranslation, since there is no plural form of nouns in the Japanese language (so you can’t always tell if it’s father or fathers), but it was nice believing Hide had gay dads for a while, even if it was a short while lol rip.

I like what Tsukiyama ended up doing, he’s helping rebuild the society and his family, basically being super important and leading the entire ghoulkind, more or less. The boy will go down in history! I knew he had it in him, his character growth has been incredible, and he’s finally getting the recognition he deserves! But I still think wedding planning would’ve been the ideal career choice for him.... Also, the way he spoils Touken’s daughter later in the chapter is ADORABLE! And he has different hairstyles in these two scenes, I like the second one better. And there’s Banjou, awww he’s also a really important figure now, I’m happy for him! Old man Marude got a new hairstyle too, and a beard, why am I not surprised? And he’s still the boss, so that’s cool. Ah, Kiyoko being such a forever single mood lmao. Ui boy’s doing his best and I am proud of him, but he’s missing his girlfriend rip... As for Hirako, damn, the boy looks so distant, I hope he’s doing ok. Well, he’s finally living a normal life, even if he’s detaching himself from his comrades. And wow Yusa really out here at the top of his game, both his career and his looks, damn.

The Qs also got their own satisfactory endings, I believe. I nearly sobbed at Urie searching for Shirazu’s body, this boy’s amazing development and how he constantly goes back to Shirazu in his mind has seriously cost me a few years of life. And then him visiting Shirazu’s grave, with Shirazu’s sister there! I was hoping to see her, we finally know what her condition is, and can sleep peacefully knowing Shirazu would be so incredibly happy that she’s all up and healthy again! It’s kinda sad how Mutsuki seems to not be around as much, but at least he chose his own path that hopefully fulfills him. And it’s super sweet how he sends Touka apples, like I was totally not expecting that, but I am so glad they are on good terms now and Mutsuki is doing much better emotionally and mentally. Also, I was totally expecting like a Moment™ between Mutsuki and Urie but I guess not lol... I don’t really like actively ship it, but I like their relationship, they could have gotten more of a wrap-up, so there’s that I guess... And then there’s Saiko, who has just... become so beautiful? Like what the hell, she’s just so gosh darn pretty? And is apparently living her best life, so you go Saiko! And she’s such a CUTIE when they’re visiting Touken family, calling Touka “mama-wife” and everything, baby you are my ANGEL!

And then comes the Suzuya squad, and they’re all doing fantastic, bless. And then Suzuya and Shinohara and I jUST! I’ve been waiting for this scene for so long, and I am SO glad it didn’t just happen off-panel during the timeskip! We actually got to see it, got to experience it first-hand, the full emotional impact of it! And let me tell you, this is the scene that FINALLY made me sob! Wtf so many years of suffering paid off, and Suzuya crying at the top of his lungs, but out of happiness, paralleling that panel where he was crying out of despair in Part 1 of the manga? I’M CRYING! AND THEN! Suzuya’s also like the literal star of this whole TSC project, YOU GO LITTLE MAN! AND THEN! And then Naki and Miza, and just... WOW! Miza, how much D can you even take?? NINE KIDS??? I mean good for you, I love you both, but DAMN! Man, I’m just so happy they’re both alive, I seriously thought Naki was a goner until a few weeks ago, so seeing him and Miza happily together like this is so surreal. And then we have another very important ship, Nishiki and Kimi, and damn Nishiki is either having a bad hair day or that’s simply a bad haircut lol. Like dude seriously, go back to the fantastic hairstyle you were rocking before. But anyway, I’m so happy seeing him and Kimi together and MARRIED? BLESS! Been waiting for that for literal years! Kimi is doing such an amazing job, helping create a more peaceful society, even though she’s using her boyfriend as test subject in the process lol. LOOK AT MY GIRL CHIE YO! She be going PLACES! SEIDOU! DUDE! Why you gotta be an Edgelord like that, please come back! Well, he’s probably too broken to fit into this new society, so he’s working out ways to live his life the best he can, helping in his own way. But don’t make such a sad face Seidou! I was hoping to see a bit more of him, but I guess we’re not meant to know much. He’s a loner, a mystery even for the readers.

And now... AYAHINA IS CANON MY DUDES! THAT IS ALL! Listen, I don’t even like... hardcore ship it, but it’s just plain obvious, it’s just right THERE! Hinami is playful, Ayato is tsundere, and love is in the air! PEACE! Also, Ayato sure saved his brother-in-law’s ass back there, just like we’d hoped he would, he really does care! Hinami is a teacher *sobs* Kaneki you taught her well, and Ayato’s this cool Main guy, look how far he’s come! I’m just so happy for both of them, I’ve been rooting for these kids for so long, Hinami is finally free from all her burdens and is genuinely Happy, and being Ayato is no longer suffering, can y’all believe??? And then we have Yoriko and Takeomi and a new addition to their family, how precious is that! Now, I would’ve liked for those notes about each character to say something about Yoriko’s relationship with Touka, I mean they were best girlfriends! And their friendship was kinda huge, I think it deserved at least a mention. Just something like “She visits Touka regularly” would’ve been enough. Ishida probably just forgot lol, the poor man, having to think about so many characters and their entire lives, I don’t blame him for just randomly forgetting to include some things. I just think this is one of those things that are kinda hard to forget, considering how meaningful this friendship was for Touka, and how it even played a big role in the final arc of the manga. But hey, maybe there’s hope that it’ll be included in the volume version lol. Or maybe in the omake! Ishida you have the opportunity to give us such pure, domestic omake, you’ve never failed us before, do your magic!

YOMO!!! RIBBONS! YOMO WITH RIBBONS IN HIS HAIR!!!!!! This transcends all the levels of adorable of anything ever! We were right, Yomo is the most doting uncle in existence, and it’s all I ever wanted! And damn, he still bangable af. AND THE SMOL TOUKEN BABY! Well, she’s actually like six now, BUT BABY! THE TOUKEN BABY IS A GIRL is this Ishida spoiling the shippers again? And she looks like a tiny Haise, can y’all believe?! Even Haise practically made a cameo, through this precious child. Amazing. I guess she has no name, so we’ll just keep calling her Pleasure-chan, sorry baby, it’s your parents’ fault. And I guess the Clowns are just doing their thing as usual. Clowns always have the last laugh, so of course this new society has nothing on them, they’re just laughing at everything and gathering for drinking games on Friday nights. Uta is still the Sasuke to Yomo’s Naruto, I guess some things never change.

AND THEN TOUKA MY LOVE! She looks so pretty, so beautiful, so dazzling, so fresh! I am so happy for her and so proud! She finally has a peaceful home and a happy family she’s always dreamed of having, IT’S WHAT SHE DESERVES! And on top of that, she has all these amazing friends who come to visit her! So many good things for my favorite character, thank you Ishida for my live! Again, I would’ve liked to know more about what she’s doing in life, but I can still hope the omake will tell me that lol. I’m just satisfied knowing she’s living her absolute best life, after struggling so much through life, suffering from such an early age, having to deal with abandonment issues her entire life, and then selflessly waiting, AND IT PAID OFF MY GIRL IT ALL PAID OFF!

AND THEN COMES OUR BOY! OUR BOY! The lonely boy who has gone through so much pain, lived his own tragedy for most of his life, never even imagining he would ever find joy or fulfillment or that he would ever heal. YET HERE HE IS! HERE IS THAT BOY WHO ONLY WANTED TO GO ON A DATE BUT GOT HIS LIFE TURNED UPSIDE DOWN INSTEAD! And now his life is finally, FINALLY fixed and things are OKAY and he is so LOVED and has a FAMILY! And yes, he’s definitely not 100% ok, and he never will be, but he has matured so much and come so far in life, he’s able to at least be at peace with himself and live a somewhat normal life. IT’S WHAT HE DESERVES! Like, I know we were all expecting Kaneki to face the consequences of his actions. From the narrative point of view, it seemed logical. But looking at it now, it wasn’t really necessary. Kaneki’s already learned his lesson. And he’s not living a life free of burdens either. He’s still an active part of the collective effort to recreate the world, and the chapter gave us a glimpse into his mind and his feelings. He is still unsure and conflicted, and it’s frustrating not being able to do anything, but he has to live with it. Finally, Kaneki has to settle for “there are things I cannot do”. He has to settle for a new and different life, and learn to live with himself and everything his actions caused. The consequences follow him every day, in the form of this new conflict. He has already suffered enough, is torturing him more really that necessary, just because he’s “the tragic protagonists”? Characters have gotten away with worse things, just saying. Also, judging from the marks on his face and neck, it seems he’s still having some trouble with his RC levels and healing and stuff, I just hope it doesn’t affect his body in bad ways. I mean he’s damaged his body so many times, it would be unrealistic not to expect consequences, but at least it’s not serious. Otherwise it would’ve been addressed. I mean, judging from Touka’s round tummy, it appears he managed to fill her up yet again, so yeah, he fine. (All the condom jokes can end now, Touka and Kaneki are nothing compared to Naki and Miza.)

In the end, Kaneki’s story ends on a positive, hopeful note, although still somewhat bittersweet. And it pulls the whole narrative, with all the other characters’ individual stories, along with it. The cycle of tragedy is finally broken. And personally, I just couldn’t be happier! I’ve been hoping for this kind of ending for so long, I literally never really wanted a tragic ending! And don’t give me that “Happy ending = Bad ending” NAH! You can’t deny that happy endings can be good if written right! It’s true that the general profile of Tokyo Ghoul screams “TRAGEDY” but that’s exactly why I think this ending is a beautiful twist! You might have expected it, you might have not, but it’s certainly a neat contrast to the rest of the story, but instead of ruining the “vibe” imo it worked unexpectedly well! Now, if your problem doesn’t lie with the type of ending we got, but the execution of it, then I guess we’re just not on the same page lol...

Now, this ending certainly wasn’t 100% happy, which is GREAT, but it’s still very hopeful and kind of bittersweet. All in all, I’d say it’s a beautifully positive closure to an incredibly sad story. It gives a positive message, that things can sometimes work out even if life seems hopeless. We may not always have control over it, but we can damn well do our very best! And it’s not unrealistic, it’s just real life! And it’s not your typical “happily ever after “ type of ending either, because, as I said earlier, the story isn’t actually over! The author simply decided to stop telling it at this particular point. And by teasing some future events, he made this chapter feel not just like an ending, but also a new beginning, a very hopeful one at that. And one that leaves infinite possibilities for potential Part 3, if Ishida ever feels like writing one, though right now I doubt it. I think he’s done with this series, and what an amazing job he’s done, for seven years!

Well, I think that’s probably all I wanted to say lol. My emotions are all over the place and I’m practically slamming my keyboard in excitement right now, so I’m probably forgetting a lot of other thoughts that were going through my mind as I was reading the chapter. But this encapsulates most of it, probably.

Tokyo Ghoul has been one of my main fandoms for four years now, and I’m so thankful for all the time and effort Ishida put into this work! It’s so unique and means a lot to me! It has helped me through some tough times in life (which is probably hard to believe since the story itself is sad but yeah...), so seeing that all the suffering wasn’t in vain, and that it all led to THIS, is just so amazingly fulfilling and satisfying!

Thank you for everything Ishida-sensei, get some rest now!

#tokyo ghoul #tg spoilers #I have #FEELINGS #long post #excuse any typos I wrote this in life 15 minutes #I'm easy to please lol

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5ro4 · 3 years

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Dark makes no sense [Spoilers of the whole show]

I thought Netflix’s Dark season 3 was disappointing, boring and made no sense. From its first few chapters I was wishing for it to end already, but it kept going, simultaneously being a convoluted exposition dump while actually explaining nothing, then pulling an ending out of nowhere long after I had stopped caring.

It’s kinda hard to find proper criticism for the series last season; most people just praise how it’s the best possible ending and everything makes perfect sense, so I decided to write my thoughts and criticism.

I’ll clarify that I enjoyed seasons 1 and 2 a lot. They are convoluted in a good and interesting way, where everything seems to fit nicely together, to have been properly planned all along, and it carries the promise that the deeper mysteries that remain will be explained later on.

But then season 3 happens. I still think overall it’s a good show, interesting and worth watching, but season 3 is disappointing and the show as a whole is certainly no “perfectly written masterpiece”.

Massive spoilers from now on.

Even if it made logical sense, season 3 is bad.

Most of the charm of the first 2 seasons is watching how every action fits in a single linear timeline and how every cause had an unexpected consequence that makes the timeline more and more complex while maintaining perfect coherence. It’s hard to follow, but it’s doable.

Then season 3 ruins the charm by making everything so convoluted it’s impossible to follow and unsatisfactory to even try.

Complexity is enjoyable up to the point where anything can happen. Why would you still care then? How could you? A mystery is intriguing because it needs to be explained by the rules of the world; the rules you know and are able to follow. If the explanation could be “a witch did it”, then none of the mysteries would be intriguing.

So we have a character that dies, and it’s intriguing because we know he’s alive in the future, so how can this be possible? Well, there’s actually 2 parallel worlds, so he’s alive in the other world. It’s a surprising twist, but the rules have been broken; now almost every mystery can be explained by the existence of a parallel world.

But then a character dies in both worlds! How can that be? Well, in the second world there’s actually two intertwined timelines, so they died in one of them but no the other.

How are you supposed to care about anything that happens from this point onward? No mystery is that mysterious when the possibility of a convoluted explanation involving multiple worlds and timelines is always there. And why even bother trying to make sense of it when they could pull out a fourth timeline or a third parallel world at any moment (and they actually do)?

Character’s motivations are impossible to follow because everyone is lying and being double-crossed by alternate reality characters all the time.

Half of the characters you are following now aren’t even the original characters but their versions from another world or another timeline inside that second world, so it’s really difficult to keep caring about any of them.

I’m not even going to attempt to criticize any of the fine details or possible loose ends because when characters can jump between timelines and realities at any time and all of them are either lying or being lied to, I’m pretty sure that by watching the show 3 times and reading the wiki you could find some plausible explanation for any small inconsistency, but at this level of complexity who even cares.

However, I think there are major, big picture flaws that somehow seem to have gone over most people’s head.

1.- The end is the beginning, therefore every action is an explanation for itself.

Most of the plot and almost the entirety of season 3 could be summed up as: A ton of people do nonsensical things because they know their future selves did those things, so they must repeat them because time is linear (except in the end it isn’t).

The bootstrap paradox is the cheap way this show has to explain any mystery and any character motivation: It happened the first time, so it must happen the second one too. Since this is a loop with no beginning, there is no need for any action to have had a logical explanation at one point.

It becomes useless to try to understand why any of the main mysterious characters do anything or what their plan is, because it can always be explained (and often does) as just “this is what happened the first time, so it must happen the second one too”.

There’s a point where one character is compelled to kill himself just because a character from the future saw him kill himself, so he must kill himself now so the future is consistent, even though there was never an actual reason for him to kill himself.

This is cheap and lazy because you can have any character doing any mysterious thing and no explanation is needed. Why do Noah and Helge drop dead kids at specific times and locations? Because they are just repeating what their future selves did, and since the loop has no beginning, no original reason exists.

2.- Adam, Eve and Claudia’s plans and motivations make no sense.

Adam and Eve’s motivations, and to some extent Claudia’s, are extremely unclear. They are the ones who explain to everyone else how time and parallel worlds work, except they are always lying and opposing their younger selves, and they are actually wrong about how all of it works.

This makes it hard to actually know what their actual motivations are, since the show doesn’t clearly show when and how they arrived at their current understanding of the world. It’s somewhat clear what they are trying to do, but not why they are trying to do so or what makes them so confident about their knowledge.

The show presents Adam and Eva as opposing forces trying to control time, while Claudia helps one or the other at different times for different reasons, yet most of the time all of them are actually doing exactly the same thing: Trying to make everything happen as it happened the last time.

So the story goes something like this: Following Adam’s instructions, Young Jonas tries to change the past by preventing himself from being born. Claudia stops him, tells him he must fight against Adam and therefore he can’t stop existing, so he must let history repeat itself. Jonas works alongside Claudia and somehow eventually ends up becoming Adam, whose plan, according to the Dark Wiki (dark-netflix.fandom.com) is to keep the cycle going.

This makes no sense, but that last part is actually wrong, at least to some extent, which shows that even the people writing the wiki don’t really know Adam’s motivations.

By the end of the show, it’s clear what is the ultimate thing each of them are trying to accomplish: Adam wants to destroy both worlds, Eve wants to keep the cycle going to avoid Adam destroying the worlds, and Claudia wants to save her daughter in at least one world. None of them seems to actually care about the apocalypse, although that was supposed to be the main conflict to avoid.

But how did Adam and Eve reach those conclusions? That’s never properly explained and their whole development seems nonsensical and contradictory: They try to change the past as their younger selves, they grow old trying and realize it’s impossible, so they turn around and try to prevent their younger selves from changing it.

At every chance they had to actually change the past someone appeared to stop them or convinced them not to do it, yet they somehow end up with the belief that time cannot be changed, while simultaneously doing their best effort to ensure time is not changed.

This is a total contradiction. Either you think time can be changed and try to do so, or you think time can’t be changed and do nothing about people trying, since you don’t need to prevent anyone from doing what you believe to be impossible.

Adam’s plan is to kill Martha and her baby, since her son is who ultimately will put the whole cycle in motion. If he is successful, he will create a paradox where the cycle was never put in motion therefore none of them exist, and thus they will cease to exist*. To do so, he needs to make pregnant-Martha go through a time travel portal because quantum shenanigans say that’s the only way to remove her baby from existence.

* “A paradox happens therefore we suddenly stop existing” makes no logical sense, but since it’s a common trope, let’s ignore it for now.

Eva knows of Adam’s plan and disagrees. For some not properly explained reason, she would rather have and infinite loop of people repeating their same miserable lives rather than ending the loop and making them disappear, thinking this is equal to them never existing, although they clearly existed. There might also be motherly instincts mixed in; the love for the son she is never shown having a conversation with before turning him into a murder machine to prevent him from not existing.

Eva’s plan is pretty stupid and evil, while Adam’s plan is contradictory, since he is preventing people from changing the past or creating a paradox in order for him to create a particular paradox as a last resource after failing to change the past.

Meanwhile Claudia is trying to repeat the timeline with the intention of actually changing everything at some point, but I don’t care to try and guess what her plan actually was all along.

3.- There’s no way Claudia could get her final revelation.

The characters are supposedly repeating the same cycle over and over, so nothing should actually change, but let’s say it can somehow because they explain something about moving grains of sand.

Concluding that a third world must exist because “there’s always a third dimension” is already a wild logical jump, but even so, how could she ever conclude that the third world was an original one that got destroyed and divided into two parallel realities, and that the reason was the clockmaker failed to make a time machine? It is completely impossible for her to conclude such things.

4.- The creation of the two worlds makes no sense.

So, there was an original world. A clockmaster tries to make a time machine, but instead destroys his world creating… two parallel worlds with 3 timelines that are interconnected in an extremely convoluted loop without beginning? And neither of those worlds actually spawns from the moment he activates the time machine, since he is intercepted years before that by those world’s time travelers?

This is a total cop-out that’s not a better explanation than “magic”. A dude made a machine that destroyed the world and spawned 3 seasons of a completely arbitrary but conveniently interconnected mystery thriller.

5.- Time rules are inconsistent

There’s a scene in which time is proven to be so deterministic that Jonas is literally immortal. He can't be killed because that’s not the place and time where he’s supposed to die in. This is both dumb and inconsistent.

The concept makes sense to a certain extent: If the character is alive in the future, it means he didn’t die in the past. However, that only works as long as the character is not trying to kill himself to prove a point. It only works somewhat elegantly in the show because Jonas accepts it as truth and doesn’t try to push it further, but what if he didn’t? What if he kept trying to kill himself just because he knows he can’t? Would knives break and guns keep getting jammed? It’s dumb because it implies time is a sentient being that will go out of its way to prevent things that aren’t supposed to happen from happening.

Also, it’s inconsistent because it’s latter confirmed that the past can in fact be changed.

6.- Conflicting beliefs are held at the same time.

Eva devotes her life to ensure everything happens as it should happen while simultaneously being 100% sure things will happen in the present as they happened in the future and there’s no way to avoid that. She is dumbfounded when Adam doesn’t kill her the moment he was supposed to kill her.

I’m pretty sure Adam and Claudia hold these same contradicting beliefs at one point or another, simultaneously believing the past can’t change while making their best effort to ensure it doesn’t change.

7.- Time stopped for a brief moment.

Claudia literally says that time stopped for a brief moment when the clockmaster activated his time machine or something.

Think about that. She’s telling you that time stopped during a small period of time. She's using time to mesure the lack of time.

Also, how could she ever know if time was stopped and for how long (hah), and how does it make any sense that her plan is to do something while time is stopped.

8.- Deep meaningful answers for the gullible.

This is not a plot hole, just a criticism to the writing and the development of the plot: Almost every time a character makes a crucial question to the character that holds the answer, they either don’t respond because of the bootstrap paradox (“my future self didn’t explain it to you so now that I’m in the same situation I won’t explain it either to avoid changing the past”) or they quote a philosopher or something in an attempt to seem deep while giving a non-answer that’s completely unrelated to the current conversation.

This is an actual conversation from the show:

- Why are you storing barrels full of nuclear waste inside an underground cave? - What we know is a drop, what we don't know is an ocean.

OK! No more questions then!

9.- Blind trust in the wrong person.

This is also a relatively minor nitpick I just want to get off my chest.

Characters, particularly Jonas and Martha, blindly trust anyone who appears before them and tell them they have been lied to, even after discovering that the last three people who supposedly revealed the truth to them was actually lying too.

This could still be believable given the circumstances until we get to the point when they would rather trust a total stranger over their future selves. Why would you trust anyone over your future self? Even if they are lying, you will become them in the future; their plan will be your plan, no matter how hard is it to understand now. Yet Jonas doesn’t require any proof from Claudia before trusting her completely over Adam.

10.- Why are Jonas and Martha needed to stop the cycle?

This is never actually explained beyond some vague idea of them being at the center of everything. Claudia could have traveled to the original world herself. Jonas could have done it too without taking Martha with him.

How do they even tune the machine to take them to a world that no longer exists?

11.- The whole time tunnel with Jonas and Martha?

???

12.- The resolution is a paradox, and thus impossible.

In order to stop time travel from ever existing they need to travel in time and prevent time travel from being created, thus making their existence a paradox, which makes them slowly disappear in a cloud of gold dust.

I know this was done for the visual spectacle, but still.

So much struggle against determinism, so many exposition dumps, so much care to make every piece fit perfectly in the timeline, just for the final resolution to be a blatant paradox. Pretty, but not really fitting.

Even though multiple universes with multiple timelines are shown to exist, somehow the rules of time only allow for a single timeline to exist in the end, even if that timeline contains an impossible paradox.

#dark #netflix

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