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#keep in mind i haven't read every fic ever!
purple-obsidian · 12 hours
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Heyyyyy pookieeee-i saw your Jason todd fic and wanted to ask,what do you think he will be like teaching his gf how to drive?
(Because nobody in my freaking life taught me how to drive yet so I have to sit like a duck and wait for someone to pick me up when I wanna go somewhere pleaseeee let me drivee-)
be brave (jason todd x fem reader) wc 800
⭓ fluff isn't my normal cup of tea. but for you, pookie, i can make an exception ;) sorry this took a while to answer, hope you don't mind i made this specific to driving a motorcycle. that's just what felt right when i was meditating on this prompt so i went with it. enjoy.
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"Jason, are you sure this is a good idea?"
"You second guessing me, princess?"
"Yeah, maybe I am. I could kill us!"
Jason scoffs and shakes his head in disbelief. "You think I would let that happen? Ever?" With cocky grin, Jason walks over and stares down at you, noting the apprehension on your face. "Remember the day we met? You told me you had a bucket list. Things you wanted to do before you died."
"Yeah, I only told you that because I thought I was going to die. You rescued me. I got plenty of time now, I don't have to learn how to drive tonight. Its already dark." You reach your hand up reflexively to rest against his chest as he gets closer. Its a habit of yours. You always find yourself drawn to the steady beating of his heart. Its grounding, and you need some of that right now.
"The road is well lit. We're miles from the outskirts of Gotham, no traffic out here. Just you and me, baby. Why not now?" His large hand rests over yours, pressing it more firmly against his chest. His heart is beating slow and steady, and his piercing green eyes are filled with admiration. "You and I both know that every day we have together is precious. Why wait to do the things you wanna do? Besides, I'd feel better knowing my girl can drive my bike if she needs to."
Jason knows you too well, calling you his girl like that makes you feel weak in the knees. Your own heart beats faster as you break your gaze away from your boyfriend smiling down at you, looking over at the motorcycle he brought you here on. For some reason, it looks more intimidating than it did a few minutes ago. You swallow the lump in your throat before looking back at him. "I'm nervous."
"I know." He states matter-of-factly. Of course he knows, he can read you like a book.
"I've literally never driven anything before. Like ever. I haven't even-"
"Shhh." Jason's hand leaves yours and cups your face gently. His other hand is on your waist, keeping you close. "You don't have to be good at it right away. I don't expect you to be. But you're smart. And you're perceptive. And I know after a little practice, you'll get more confident. I won't let us crash, baby, promise."
Jason really does know you too well. He can see the rebuttal forming on your lips before he finishes speaking. So he leans down to kiss it away before you can verbally express your doubts. The tinge of frustration you feel at being cut off isn't enough to keep you mind from turning to mush from the kiss. His lips are so warm, his breath tastes like spearmint, and his touch gives you butterflies.
But the kiss ends all too quickly. You know he cut it short it on purpose, not wanting your brain to turn off completely before you try and drive for the first time. "Sorry, babygirl, can't give you too much. How could you drive if you're all drunk from my kisses? Hm?"
He runs his fingers through your hair, taking in how cute you look when you're speechless. A moment later, Jason releases his hold on you and turns towards his bike, walking to it with a bit of pep in his step and smugness in his grin, leaving you stammering for a second as you try and string together a coherent thought.
"F-fuck you, Jason." You say after a moment. He always knows how to shut me up.
"I love you too." He grabs his helmet and puts it on before tossing you yours. It's an easy catch, but you're still giving him a dirty look.
"Why did we have to do driving first?" You grumble, accepting your defeat. "Pretty sure seeing the pyramids was also on my bucket list. Along with an abundance of other fun things, like riding in a helicopter, or swimming with dolphins. Or what about joining the mile high club? I'd think that one would be your first priority."
Jason is beaming, watching you put your helmet on and get ready to ride. Even as you scowl at him and mutter complaints, his heart melts at how easily you folded. All it took was a kiss. He always gets his way. He knows you can't say no to him. Jason Todd has you wrapped around his finger, and the vigilante couldn't be any happier about it. He looks you up and down to admire your body before replying, "Stick with me, princess, and I'll make all your dreams come true." He promises. "One at a time. I'll show you the pyramids. I'll fuck you in a plane. But first…"
He grabs you by your waist with both hands and effortlessly lifts you up off the ground to set you down on the seat of his bike. You yelp in surprise, quickly grabbing his hands to steady yourself. "First, you gotta be brave and learn how to ride your boyfriend's bike."
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⭓ masterlist ⭓
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tenok · 8 months
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onlyhuis · 2 months
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amateur hour
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member — camboy!jun x f reader genre — smut, f2l, idiots to lovers, fluffy ending word count — 8.6k synopsis — the most awkward encounter of your life might just end up being the best thing you and your best friend have ever done together. warnings — descriptions of female anatomy, masturbation (jun), voyeurism & exhibitionism (watching porn together), jun is a big time simp but in a soft way, please lmk if i missed any! notes — huge thanks to @onlymingyus and @highvern for reading this for me to make sure i wasn't insane, and thanks to @cheolism and @duhnova for help with the title <3 this is my longest fic in a while and it took so much energy to finish but i hope yall enjoy! please reblog or send an ask and lmk if you enjoyed this! :)
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"hello? anybody home?"
jun squeezes his eyes shut, throwing his head back with a stifled moan as he cums all over his hand. his grip on his cock tightens, milking every last drop out across his abs as he fights to keep himself quiet.
fuck, he forgot. forgot he'd told you to come over tonight. forgot he'd promised a movie night to cheer you up after your latest dating disaster. he feels like the worst friend on the planet right now, for so many reasons.
the main reason? the fact that he's just finished cumming at the thought of you… and also the fact that he's been streaming the whole thing to thousands of people.
out of breath, he presses a couple keys before slamming his laptop shut. no goodbye to his viewers, no thanking the people who donated. but they're used to his unconventional streams, often barely acknowledging their existence or even not talking at all. not because he cares deeply about staying anonymous, but because he's just so… average.
maybe that's why he's so popular: he's just a regular guy jerking off. people like that amateur stuff. no elaborate productions, no fancy camera work, just a guy with a laptop and a really pretty cock (or so he's been told). he could be anyone: your classmate, your neighbor, the cute guy from the library. he might even be your best friend.
"in here— changing!" he calls through his closed door, rushing as fast as he can to clean himself up and put clothes on. he's mentally praising himself for remembering to make his bed this morning, and after wiping a suspicious looking stain off his desk and fixing his chair, his room looks halfway decent.
he tosses open his bedroom door to greet you, throwing a smile onto his face. he doesn't want you to feel like you're intruding—he loves it when you come over, he wouldn't have given you his house key if he didn't want you to—even though at this exact moment, you very much are intruding. even though he invited you over in the first place. fuck, he's such an idiot.
when jun hadn't answered any of your texts before you let yourself in his apartment, you'd figured he'd forgotten about tonight. you'd hoped tonight would be an exception, but it's not out of the ordinary for him to be forgetful. any other day you wouldn't have minded, even teased him about it, but not tonight. especially since he invited you over in the first place.
but all of your worries are suddenly pushed to the backseat when he comes out of his room looking… well, hot.
like, literally hot. he's sweating, his hair disheveled and his pupils huge as he pushes his shirt sleeves up his arms.
it takes a second for you to take it all in— obviously he'd forgotten about his promise and had started a workout instead. you can't say you haven't noticed lately how often he's started working out, his biceps bulking up and his chest peeking out through his shirts. you'd wondered when he's been finding the time to go to the gym, his excuse for years being that he's too busy or too lazy to leave the house, but it seems like he's been working out at home too now.
you stand awkwardly in the space between his living room and the door, watching the beads of sweat forming at his hairline. “if now's a bad time, i can— leave…”
"no!" he rushes to say, and you pause at his sudden outburst. "no. just... let me take a shower real quick. i'm so sorry, i lost track of time." he runs his hand through his hair, trying to calm himself down while you try not to stare.
"sure," you say after a long moment. his eyes pause to travel over your face with an expression you can't read, but maybe you just imagined that because seconds later he's back to his cheery, usual self telling you to make yourself cozy on his bed and start looking for a movie while he's in the shower.
standing under the cold water, he promises to himself that he's going to get everything right tonight, despite the rocky start. he's gonna bring out the snacks and put on the movie and make you happy again. because that's what he always does, and he may not be the most perfect person in the world but he tries to be for you.
he's been there for every new boyfriend you tell him about that he already knows won't end well, and he's been there when it inevitably doesn't end well. he's been there without a single complaint for every drunk saturday night and every hungover sunday morning. and he's not going to complain this time either, no matter his feelings for you and how badly he wishes you would just date him instead. maybe he's a little biased, but he thinks he'd make a great boyfriend.
you sit at the edge of his bed wringing your hands until you hear the shower start to run, finally letting out a deep exhale and starting to relax with a moment to yourself. 
he’ll take his shower, and it’ll be like a reset button for the evening; he’ll come out nice and clean like nothing ever happened, and you’ll snuggle up and watch a funny movie and maybe get a little drunk and forget all your troubles for the weekend. a clean slate, as if you hadn’t had to use every ounce of self control you’ve got in order to avoid ogling him and the way his sweat drenched shirt clung to his torso. 
you’ll have such a fantastic time with the movie, you won’t even have time to stop and think about the fact that he probably works out shirtless. no, you definitely aren’t thinking about how you’ve never seen any gym equipment around his house so he must be doing like a crazy amount of pushups or something to get that ripped without any kind of exercise machine. the fact that these are not the kind of thoughts you should be thinking about your best friend is entirely irrelevant.
content with your plan to avoid thinking for the rest of the evening, you stand up from his bed and move to stand at his desk, opening his laptop to find something to watch.
and oh, you find something to watch, alright.
staring back at you on his screen is a porn site, paused on a video of a man laid naked across a worn out looking chair, legs spread wide with his cock tightly in his fist.
oddly enough, your first thought is that the scene looks… hot. the top of the video cuts off at the neck, hiding his face from the camera but leaving his prominent adam's apple exposed. it’s very obviously amateur, but even from just the single frame shown, you get the sense that there’s a certain charm to it. and quite honestly, it’s working for you.
apparently, it works for a lot of other people, too. the video has hundreds of thousands of views, and below it are suggested videos from the same man that boast similar numbers.
jun never struck you as the type of guy to watch solo male videos, but you aren't here to judge his preferences. hell, you've seen way worse yourself. there must be something he likes about it, though, and you’re half tempted to press play on the video to find out if the rest of it is as good as the preview seems to be.
you're about to close the tab and never speak of it again, but something else catches your eye and you pause, finger hovering over the mousepad. something about the guy in the video feels… familiar, somehow.
looking closer you see there's a little mole on his tummy, right by his hip, that reminds you of the one jun has. you've seen him without his shirt on enough times to recognize it—not like you've been staring or anything. just something you've noticed. 
but then your stomach flips, and you realize what's actually familiar about the guy in the video. tied around his wrist is a thin red string, a friendship bracelet you made when you first met him and accidentally tied it too tight so he couldn't take it off that he's worn ever since.
there's no way that's a coincidence.
and then everything else starts to fall into place: the posters in the background of the video. the old desk chair you’ve sat in so many times that you’ll never be able to see the same way again. too many pieces fitting easily together like a puzzle.
but by the time you've had long enough to process all this information, the shower has stopped and out walks jun wearing nothing but a loose pair of sweatpants. your eyes drag away from the sight of his wet, naked chest and instantly fix on the bracelet tied around his wrist, unable to stop staring at it.
you distantly hear him call your name, and your gaze snaps back up at him with wide, guilty eyes, caught like a deer in headlights.
he opens a drawer and starts tugging a t-shirt on over his head, turning around to look at you. “did you find something to watc— oh.”
you follow his gaze towards his open laptop, the video sitting proudly on display in the tab you forgot to close.
you both stare at the paused video for a very long moment, the silence stretching on before all the words that were stuck in your throat suddenly come tumbling out all at once.
“i wasn’t— it was just open… i didn’t—”
he stands there in silence, and you stand there in silence, and the evidence sits on the desk between you like a wall that makes you feel intensely exposed, even though he’s the one who’s sitting naked on the open screen.
your first instinct (after panic, of course) is to slink home and hide yourself in your room and try to erase the image of your best friend’s dick from your memory. you’ve never thought they looked very attractive before, but his is weirdly beautiful to look at, and you’re not willing to explore that train of thought. also, way bigger than you were expecting, but it’s not like you thought about it often enough to guess how big he is or anything. 
“maybe i should go home and we should just forget about tonight,” you rush to add when he still doesn’t say anything after a lengthy pause. 
jun’s face falls, and you immediately feel a pang of guilt for trying to run. “you don't have to go,” he says quickly. “it’s not— um, nothing weird about it, right? i’m sorry, i should have closed it, or…” he pauses, stumbling over his words almost as badly as you are. “i don’t wanna make you uncomfortable. i promise my sheets—and everything in my room—is clean.” he tries an awkward smile, and it makes you feel really bad about making him feel bad.
“it's not weird at all. it's totally normal. i was just… surprised,” you try to smile back, but it doesn't work as well on you as it does on him. “just a shock, i guess. trying to process it. but it's fine. i promise.”
“i won't make it weird,” he says. “you don't have to watch it or anything.” he kind of wants you to.
“i wasn't thinking about it.” you definitely were.
there's another uncomfortably long silence. “so anyway, did you pick out a movie?” he asks at the same time you ask him a question, both trying to keep the conversation going, but you realize you should've kept your mouth shut and let him take the lead because he is way more capable of being normal about this than you are.
“what do you think about when you do it?” you blurt out, and you regret the words as soon as they leave your mouth because you've realized just how invasive of a question that is and you're kind of hoping he didn't hear you, but he definitely did because he's sitting at the edge of his bed with a shocked look on his face, because out of all the things he was expecting you to say it definitely wasn't that.
“don't answer that. i don't know why i said that,” you follow up immediately, trying to mitigate the damage but it's too late.
his eyebrows are scrunched up in thought. “no, i don't care. i—um… i just don't know how to answer that without making it weird.”
“you don't have to,” you say quickly.
he turns to you, but you pointedly look away. “do you actually want to know?” 
you look down at your hands, doing everything to avoid his eyes. “kinda.” yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
he laughs a little, and miraculously somehow it manages to lighten the tension, hearing that familiar sound. “you seem, like, really uncomfortable. we can just… pretend it never happened.”
“it's gonna be hard to do that. it's not every day you find out your best friend is a porn star,” you say finally. you force yourself to lift your head, at least in his general direction since you can't meet his eyes. you settle on looking at his mouth instead, but that was definitely a mistake because now you're staring at his lips and noticing for the first time how pretty they are and how soft they look and now you're wondering what it would feel like to kiss those lips and to—
“it's not really like being a porn star… well, kind of, it is. but like, not really, because—” he cuts himself off when he notices you staring. “sorry, i'll drop it. we don’t have to get into it.”
“no, i'm curious now,” you say. somehow you find the will to lift your head, finally meeting his eyes. “tell me how you do it.”
he stares blankly. “like how i jerk off, or… oh, you meant how the videos work,” he laughs as it clicks into place in his mind. obviously you wouldn't mean it like that—as much as he wishes you did.
you didn’t realize it until now but the uncomfortable, awkward tension at the initial shock of finding out that your best friend has a mildly successful porn career, has slowly been melting away into a different kind of tension. maybe it’s the adrenaline, the fight or flight instinct, or something else entirely, but it’s succeeded in making you bolder than you should be. everything in you should be telling you no, drop it, don’t invade his privacy, but all you can think is yes, please, tell me everything.
“is that what you were doing earlier? when i got here?”
he tilts his head imperceptibly at your question, eyes narrowing ever so slightly as he tries to gauge your reactions. there’s something in the air and it’s beginning to affect him too. “i feel like you’ve already guessed the answer to that.”
you can’t help the smirk that tugs at the corner of your lips at his words, gaining confidence with each passing second. “i told you, i’m curious.”
“fine.” he cocks an eyebrow at you. “yeah, i was. what else do you wanna know?”
“you never answered my question earlier.”
“what do i think about?” he repeats, tactfully ignoring the blush creeping up his neck into his cheeks. “trade secret. i can’t tell you.”
clearly you aren’t satisfied with his answer, so he sighs and looks over at you. strands of wet hair from his shower rest across his forehead, and you can’t help but be reminded of how he looked when you’d first walked in, sweaty bangs sticking to his face in a similar fashion. 
“it’s not any different than when i do it off camera. same thoughts.” his eyes trail down your body briefly before snapping back up to your face. “most of the time i don’t even remember i’m being filmed. just feels like a normal afternoon to me.”
when he meets your eyes again they almost seem to sparkle with a mischievousness he hasn’t seen from you in a long, long time. “so this is a normal afternoon for you, then? letting people watch you jerk off?” the words are more vulgar than he’s ever heard from you, but they taste good and satisfying on your tongue.
if even a quarter of jun’s brain was functioning normally right now, he might have the good sense to refuse to answer your questions. his side job was never supposed to be found out by friends or family, not because he’s embarrassed about what he does, but because he likes having that space to experiment with himself. it’s true he can try out fetishes and kinks he would’ve never known about before, yes, but more important to him is the fact that he can do whatever he wants, be whoever he wants to be, act however he wants to act.
yet he instantly buckles the second you smile and bat your pretty eyelashes at him without so much as a second thought. for as long as he’s known you he’s always had the urge to tell you everything, to talk for hours and hours about anything on his mind. he’s never felt like he needs to hide anything from you; even with this, his darkest secret, he’s an open book. willing and far too eager to answer anything you ask him.
a small, distant part of him has sort of always wanted you to find out about his alter ego, to question him exactly as you’re doing now. the thought of his secret becoming your secret, too. 
“i guess so, yeah.” he grins and glances over at his laptop still sitting open, the image of himself paused on the screen.
you follow his eyes, looking back and forth between him and the video and trying not to find the similarities between the two. “you ever do anything… together? or just solo?”
only after you’ve said it do you realize how that question sounded coming out, and yet again you wish you could take back your words. it wasn’t meant to be an offer—though deep down you really wouldn’t mind that at all—but despite the numerous boundaries you’ve already overstepped tonight, you don’t think that’s a line you’re willing to cross just yet. 
being aware of your best friend’s homemade porn and even watching it is one thing, but actually fucking him is completely different. and no matter how bad your feelings are for him, it still feels off limits. unless he suddenly decides to grab you by the neck and tell you he wants you to ride him until your legs give out (which you’d gladly do, for the record), you’re just going to have to keep those desires to yourself. 
the implications of your question hang unanswered in the air, and you stumble to explain yourself before he has the chance to outright reject you. “that's not what i mean—not like that. i wasn’t… nevermind.” you cut yourself off, hoping you haven’t managed to dig yourself a deeper hole.
the corner of his mouth upturns in a smile that you find infuriatingly hot. “you weren’t what? and no, i haven’t. never had anybody i liked enough to try it with.” he gets shy again, glancing away from you and staring at his desk chair absently. “i haven’t told anyone about it, so it’s not like i have many options even if i wanted to.”
your cheeks flush in embarrassment, and that guilty feeling in the pit of your stomach from seeing something you shouldn’t have returns. you’re the only person who knows? and you only saw it on accident, so clearly he didn’t mean for anyone to ever find out. fuck, all of this was a mistake and maybe you really should pretend like nothing ever happened.
“i’m sure the people who watch you would be lining up at your door to fuck you if you asked.”
“not interested.” he doesn’t meet your eyes, his gaze lingering on your body again for a moment too long, and for some reason that sparks something within you.
you clear your throat and it grabs his attention, looking up at you in curiosity. “well, anyway. i’ve thought of something for us to watch.”
he perks up a little, and you almost feel bad for what you’re about to do because he seems so excited at the prospect of watching an actual movie. but you’ve endured more than enough of your fair share of his teasing over the years, and part of you is still curious to finally see him in action, so you grab his laptop and sit yourself down on his bed.
he walks closer to you to see what you’ve picked out for the evening, only to find you’ve put his own video on fullscreen, nonchalantly propping his computer up on your lap to watch as if his dick isn’t sitting in front of your very eyes in 4k high definition.
his cheeks turn even redder than they already were as he freezes in place, his eyes fixed on the image of his own cock in hand and toned body on display, waiting for you to press play.
“you coming?” you pat the bed next to you expectantly, smiling such an innocent little smile as if you’re unaware of what you’re doing, though both of you already know exactly what’s going to happen. and it’s driving him up the fucking wall. 
he’s so flustered that he doesn’t even laugh at your pun, still standing at the foot of his bed and trying to summon every last shred of his dignity to stop himself from getting hard for the second time tonight. just the thought of you wanting to watch him, showing interest in the videos of him pleasuring himself has all the blood in his body rushing towards his cock, and he doesn’t know how much longer he’ll be able to keep pretending he’s fine with this.
“i’ve never watched them after filming them. i was there the first time… never felt like i needed to revisit it.” he doesn’t mention the real reason he doesn’t watch them is because he’s afraid to see what he looks like when he’s thinking about you— afraid to see how his body reacts in ways that it definitely shouldn’t be without your knowledge.
you bite your lip absentmindedly, looking up at him with an inviting expression. “first time for everything, right?” despite the confidence you’ve gained your voice still ends up coming out soft and shy, as if you’re afraid to admit how badly you want to see how this plays out.
jun’s face flushes as he tries to ignore the way his pants continue to grow tighter. “you wanna watch me? i mean— the video? together?” he’s honored… no, he’s more than honored. thousands of people watch his videos daily, yet the only one he cares about is sitting on his bed and smiling that pretty smile of yours at him.
he rests his palms on the edge of his bed frame, and you can’t help the way your eyes rake over his body in reaction. he’s tall and always has been, towering over you as long as you’ve known him, but he never seems to be aware of just how big he is. or maybe he is and just knows how to use it to his advantage. either way, you can’t hide the shiver running down your spine as he leans over the bed towards you.
he can feel his body tingling with anticipation as he takes a seat down anxiously beside you, your fingers hovering over the mousepad before you finally unpause the video. no going back now.
at first you think the sound isn’t working as you watch him adjust his position on the chair in silence, but when you hear the seat squeak you realize he’s just quiet. your palms are clammy as you keep your hands planted at your sides, waiting for the action to start. just the image of him naked is enough to send you into a spiral, but you force yourself to be patient, knowing there’s better things to come.
you try not to stare at him next to you, but it’s impossible with the way he keeps nonchalantly adjusting his sweats every few seconds. you can tell he’s trying not to let on how hard he is, but unfortunately for him you're way too hyper aware of yourself in this moment and nothing goes unnoticed.
your gaze stays glued to the screen as you watch the recording of jun leaning back in his chair, tentatively taking his cock into his hand with a soft sigh. you don’t notice that you’ve been holding your breath until he starts moving his hand up and down along his length, letting out a shaky sigh that matches the ones from his recording. your cheeks are burning but you can’t bring yourself to stop staring as he brushes his thumb across his leaking tip, smearing his precum around with his fingers.
the muscles in his thighs tense and he lets out a little whine, and it sends a shiver throughout your whole body. you can’t see his face on the video, but you’ve seen his expressions enough to get the picture, and it drives you wild. you need to see it close up, need to see those faces he makes and confirm the way you’ve imagined it.
but even with his beautiful, painfully hard cock right in front of you, you still can’t take your eyes off of the friendship bracelet tied around his wrist, watching as it brushes against his cock with every stroke of his fist. you wonder how long he’s been doing this, how long and you’d never realized. he’d never seemed like the type, but then again, you were learning a lot of things about your friend tonight.
you manage to pry your eyes away from the video but your gaze just ends up back on instead, sitting beside you with the same thin bracelet adorning his slender wrist. you squeeze your thighs together as you stare at it, willing yourself not to think about it, but when another broken and muffled moan comes out of the laptop speaker you can’t take it anymore.
you suddenly stop the video, pushing his computer off your lap and closing the screen. he jumps and looks at you, eyes wide with concern. you'd hated it, didn't you? you thought he was a loser and this was all such a bad idea and he should've pretended it never happened in the first place because now your friendship is ruined and—
"show me."
jun swears he stops breathing for a second. he must not have heard you clearly, but when he pulls his gaze up to meet yours he finds you staring back expectantly, a hint of a smile on your face and a look in your eyes that makes him want to pounce on you and never look back.
"what?" his voice comes out cracked. god, if you're saying what he thinks you are… he's never been this hard in his entire life, including all the times he's edged himself to the thought of you. there's no way in hell he isn't hallucinating right now, because the expression on your face is straight out of his dreams.
your wandering eyes flit down to his bulge. "i thought you said you did live shows."
your heart is pounding, fearing you've finally crossed that last forbidden line for good. who knows when you got so bold, but you couldn't handle watching another second of that video without doing something about it. despite his shyness you know he's enjoying this, with the way he keeps tugging at the hem of his shirt and struggling to hide his painfully obvious boner. it's not like you're doing any better yourself, and you wonder if he can feel the heat radiating off your body right now or if he's noticed the way you can't stop squirming.
you hadn't expected that hearing his breathy whimpers through the laptop's tinny speakers and watching his abs flex on the screen as he squeezes his hand around his cock would have such an effect on you, but it's hard not to when the star of the movie is sitting right beside you. you're afraid to even move, at risk of revealing the wet spot beneath you seeping into his sheets that he was so adamant earlier about being clean. well, you know one thing for sure— they won't be clean after tonight.
so, you clear your throat and choose your next words carefully this time, knowing exactly what you're asking for and hoping, praying it'll be reciprocated. "why would i wanna watch a video when i can see it in person?"
"fuck—" his voice is strained, and your stomach flips at the sudden low tone coming from his throat that you aren't used to hearing. "you want—”
"i wanna see you," you cut him off, jumping on the chance that he didn't immediately shut you down. you look pointedly at the bulge in his pants, making sure he sees you looking. "do you ever do private shows?" you feel the heat in your cheeks burning with shyness, but you press on, your voice soft. "you know… one on one?”
“no— yeah,” he says hurriedly. “i mean, i can now. for you. if you want.” he adds the last part like an afterthought, because even though you just straight out asked to watch him jerk off, he still can’t comprehend that you’re into this. that you, his best friend of all people, is this eager to see him.
your reply comes out choked with desperation, but he’s so lost in your reactions that you doubt he even notices the change in your tone. “please?”
with dazed eyes he nods, moving his hands down to the waistband of his pants, and it feels like time moves in slow motion as you strain your eyes for a glimpse.
your breath catches in your throat as you watch him push his sweatpants down just below his hips, freeing his cock. the thick veins on his hands that you're used to ogling in your free time are nothing compared to the veins that cover his length, and they’re nothing compared to the grainy video from his computer, either.  you're so tempted to touch him, you have to physically restrain yourself from reaching over and wrapping your hand around him, to feel its weight in your palm and feel how hard he is.
he soaks up your reaction, his pride soaring at the way your mouth is practically watering for him. he makes sure you're watching, then pushes his sweatpants all the way off and leans back against the headboard of the bed, spreading his legs to get a more comfortable position before he starts.
“you gonna answer my question now?” you ask, your voice soft yet still teasing as he begins to drag his hand up and down his shaft slowly, pumping himself to full hardness as if he hadn't already been fully hard for the last hour.
the look in his eyes when he glances back up at you makes your heart jump, and suddenly the answer seems as clear as day. but you’re afraid to believe in it in case you’re still wrong about everything; even now as you kneel beside him on his bed, his eyes boring into yours as you watch him fist his cock, you can’t let yourself have hope that he feels the same about you. there’s been nothing to suggest that he does, besides the fact that he didn’t immediately throw you out of his house the second you found out about his alternative career.
he doesn’t answer for a long moment, and you feel your entire body growing hot under his gaze. for the second time tonight you feel stripped bare, despite the fact that you’re fully clothed and he’s the one half naked in front of you.
“are you sure you wanna hear the answer?” he says finally, and despite the way his voice comes out choked you can tell he’s just as nervous about this as you are. years of friendship changed by just one sentence, but whether it’ll be for better or for worse, you haven’t figured out yet.
you’re not sure if you really do, but you nod anyway, searching his eyes for any signs of hesitation. he groans softly, bucking his hips up a little into his fist as he opens his mouth to speak. you scoot closer to hear him, drawn to him like a magnet and your heart pounding as you wait for the words you so badly want to hear.
“right now?” he pauses. “i’m thinking about how bad i wanna kiss you.”
and after that it’s like a dam breaking apart, losing every bit of self control you’d worked so hard to maintain for so long as you press forward and meet his lips. his hands jump to your hips, instantly forgetting what he was doing as he gently tugs you onto his lap to get a better angle. 
you slide your legs beneath you, straddling his lap with your knees on either side of his waist as your mouth slides against his. kissing him comes as naturally to you as breathing, almost immediately finding a rhythm with his nose pressed against your cheek.
he starts out slow, tentative, but as soon as you kiss him back he’s throwing his own self control to the wind and pulling you deeper into him. you can feel his aching cock pressing into your stomach, and it takes everything in you not to grind down on him and ease the throbbing between your legs.
you finally force yourself to pull away, taking in the sight of him. his cheeks are flushed and he’s panting, eyes darting back and forth between yours in questioning at your sudden pause. “is— is that all you think about?” you ask, but it comes out more like a whimper. if it were anyone else you’d be mortified at how worked up you’ve gotten in such a short time, but if anything jun looks worse than you do right now.
“i think about you every fucking time,” he admits breathlessly. as always, giving up his so-called trade secrets the second you ask, because he can’t hide anything. doesn’t want to hide anything from you. “can’t stop thinking about you, even when i try not to—”
“during your streams?”
“—especially during my streams.”
you push your hips down gently, feeling your soaked panties sticking uncomfortably to your folds at the movement, but it’s all worth it for the angelic moans that fall from his lips in return. “and earlier…?” you pry. you don’t know why you’re so full of questions tonight, but a part of you relishes in his praise and the way he so readily admits his thoughts to you.
he stifles another groan, his hands trailing haphazardly over your body like a kid in a candy store, as if he isn’t sure what to touch first but he does know that he wants to touch all of you. “earlier— got so hard thinking about you coming over, i couldn’t help it…” he squeezes his eyes shut as you reach up to rest your arms around his shoulders. “so fucking lucky that you’re my friend, i don’t deserve you.”
you brush your thumb against his cheek and his eyes shoot open, his hips stuttering beneath you in surprise. “why?” you ask softly. if anyone is undeserving of your friendship, it should be you, not him; the way he treats you like a queen, practically worshipping the ground you walk on and being the best friend you’ve ever had.
“‘cause—” he swallows hard and looks up at you, his fingers shaking a little as they wander across your hips. “fuck, the way i think about you… you’d never say yes to that.”
you smile softly, leaning closer to him until your mouths are just inches apart and you can feel his hot breath on your lips. “you never asked me.” you glance up at him expectantly, nodding your head to give him a chance to say what’s on his mind.
“can i—” he curses under his breath, his mind going haywire at even just the thought of you letting him have more of you. “can i kiss you again?”
and it’s such a genuine request that you have no choice but to indulge him, your lips parting to let him in. it’s a kiss that you feel in your entire body, from the hands that have moved to your back gently guiding you towards him, to the butterflies in your chest and much lower places. you want—no, you need all of him, all at once, need his hands and his cock and his sweet, sweet kisses.
you lean back and press your mouth against his neck instead, feeling his soft skin beneath your lips as you start to suck. he groans in response when you nip at the underside of his chin, beginning to suck harder until you bite down gently and lift your eyes to see his reaction.
suddenly he wraps his hand behind your neck and pulls your head up to meet him face to face, crashing his lips back against yours in a frantic battle of tongue and teeth, filled with a newfound desperation. his eyes are closed and brows furrowed as he kisses you, one hand on the back of your head guiding you into him.
you frantically paw at his shirt, struggling to keep yourself contained. "jun, please— let me see you."
he leans forward away from you and tears his shirt off over his head without so much as a word in reply, quickly settling back and meeting your lips once again. his mind is racing a mile a minute, so eager to give you whatever you want, whatever you ask for, whatever you need.
he's so caught up in pleasing you that the thought of asking you to take off your shirt in return doesn't even cross his mind; you could sit fully clothed on his lap for the rest of the night and he'd still be over the moon. but you do it anyway, just as eager to please him as he is for you. you pull your shirt off as fast as you can, whining in frustration when you tug too roughly and it gets caught in your hair for a half second. but you feel his hand slide up your back and help you, untangling it and balling the fabric in his fist, tossing it across the room before pulling you back to him.
you fall forward and catch yourself on the wall behind his head, forcing you to readjust your seat on his lap and cupping his cheeks with your hands to stabilize yourself. jun shifts his position as well, threading one arm around your waist and pulling you tighter against him. his palm on your skin makes you feel like you're on fire, his hand pressing gently but firmly against the bare skin of your hip.
you can feel his length resting between your bodies, still hard as ever and throbbing from so much stimulation yet so little of it being directed at where he wants it most. you start to rock your hips, slowly grinding against him and feeling your cunt pulse through the thin fabric of your panties, and you wonder if he can feel it, too.
if he does then he doesn’t mention it, too caught up in roaming his hands over your chest now that your shirt is out of the way. you feel shy, not used to so much attention from one person and especially not used to it coming from him. a part of you wishes you’d at least worn a prettier bra, but he doesn’t even seem to notice that it’s the old ratty one you wear around the house. in his eyes it might as well be made of solid gold, with the way he touches it so delicately and looks up at you in a frenzy, begging you to let him take it off.
his palms cup your breasts the second the fabric is on the floor, moaning unabashedly as he pushes his face into your chest. his tongue laves over your skin with his eyes closed in bliss, and he groans into your breast before he finally tears his mouth away from you, giving you both a second to breathe.
"please let me fuck you," he rasps, his arm still wrapped around your waist as he holds your body close to his. "fuck, please— god, i need you so bad. i'll take such good care of you, baby, please, just let me. i'll do whatever you want me to, please—"
you shiver at the desperation in his voice, and if he wasn't still cradling the back of your head in his palm you probably would've fallen backwards with a moan. even from the few minutes of his video that you'd managed to watch he didn't seem like much of a talker, so the way he rambles on and on begging for you feels like a breath of fresh air.
you waste no time in telling him yes, practically falling off his bed in your rush to stand up and strip the rest of your clothes off. he wraps his hand around his cock once more and begins to thrust shallowly into his fist as he watches you shimmy out of your pants, and you whimper at the sight that’s become so familiar over the past hour.
both finally naked, you start to reposition yourself on his lap, but in a split second he flips you over onto your back instead. you let out a yelp as he cages you in with his long limbs, his cock resting against your body as he hovers over you. 
“please,” he pants, his expression pleading with you just as much as his words are. you don’t even know what he’s pleading for at this point but you nod quickly anyway, moaning out his name until he silences you with another hot kiss.
he sits back on his heels, kneeling between your legs as you spread them open wider for him. he forces himself to look away from your dripping pussy long enough to position himself at your entrance. there’s so much more he wants to do, so much he wants to try with you, but after dreaming about you for so long and now you’re finally here, he’s not sure he’ll last long enough to find out. another day, he tells himself as he lines up his cock. another time, if you’ll let him.
he looks up at you, waiting for you to give him a signal or to back out if you’ve changed your mind, but you meet his eyes and bite at your lip and give him the tiniest nod.
his hands are shaking as he guides himself into you, pushing just the tip inside and looking back up at you for confirmation before continuing.
by the time he’s halfway inside of you he has to squeeze his eyes shut as hard as he can, every muscle in his body concentrating on trying not to explode at the feeling of your walls fluttering around him. a million thoughts are running through his head and he can barely see straight at this point, his tunnel vision focused on you and only you. if he remembers only one thing from tonight, he wants it to be this sight right here: the image of your face scrunched up in pleasure, your mouth hanging open in a breathless moan as you clench wildly around his cock. 
your hand grips his bicep impossibly tight as you adjust to his size, your fingers gradually relaxing as he continues to push into you until he bottoms out with a high pitched whine.
it takes a second for you to adjust, but as soon as you start begging him to move his body starts running on autopilot, his hips pistoning into you with more force than he knew he had in him. he’s stopped talking by now, almost completely silent except for the occasional groan and muttered curse.
you lift your legs to wrap them around his waist, pressing into his back with your heels to get him to thrust deeper until you fall apart in his arms with a cry, burying your face in his chest as your vision goes blank and the wind gets knocked out of your lungs.
he leans down over you, putting his hand between your head and the wall to stop you from being slammed into it from his thrusts as you crest into your orgasm. all you can do is hold on tightly to him, biting at his collarbone to stifle your noises as his eyes dart across your face, desperate to see how beautiful you look when you cum for him. for him, for only him, for your best friend who’s so in love with you it physically hurts.
what finally breaks him is the gentle way you reach up and hold his head with one hand, guiding him down to your lips to kiss you once more. your fingers tremble with aftershocks as you thread them into his hair, using his body to ground yourself as he fucks you into the mattress. 
his hips stutter and he barely pulls out in time to cum all over your pussy, his cock twitching as he releases onto your skin with a broken moan. there’s nothing he wants more in this world than to cum inside you, but in his desperation he didn’t think to ask ahead of time, and even his last functioning brain cell isn’t going to let that happen without your permission.
your fingers untangle themselves from his hair, sliding to his neck and down to his chest as he heaves shallow breaths. he blinks rapidly, trying to reorient himself and calm his racing heart.
“jun?”
he barely hears you calling his name, but his head tilts down to look at you before he can process it. you’re just as much of a mess as he is, sweaty hair sticking to your forehead and his cum coating your lower half, your chest rising and falling as you struggle to catch your breath.
and just like that, the fog in his mind is cleared and he’s jumping into action. he’s gonna do what he always does, what he has to do: be there for you and do everything right, even when he has no idea what’s “right” anymore because he just fucked his best friend and the love of his life and that’s not usually what best friends do, so what does that make him now? he doesn’t know and he doesn’t care, but what he does care about is making sure you’re as comfortable as possible in this, probably the weirdest and most uncomfortable situation ever.
your fingers latch onto his wrist before he can get away, and he whips around with such a dumbfounded expression that you can’t help but laugh a little. “jun,” you repeat his name again, and this time it gets through to him and he pauses, eyes wide as he looks down at you.
“huh?”
“where are you going?”
“to…” he trails off, because he doesn’t actually know where he’s going, but his brain knows he has to do something. “uh, clean?”
you laugh. “god, i love you so much. just— c’mere.”
you tug on his wrist and he topples down onto you with a yelp, but you wrap your arms around him until he stops wiggling and just sits still against you.
your bodies are covered in sweat, sticking to each other as you hold him, but it’s the most comfortable you’ve felt in what must be years. “what are you so nervous for?” you ask him with a soft chuckle, pushing his hair out of his forehead.
“because…” he pauses again and looks up at you, worry clouding his gaze. “because you’re so perfect. and i don’t wanna mess this up.”
“you’re not going to, jun. promise.” you exhale and stroke his hair again. “if anything, i’m the one that messed things up. i shouldn’t have found out about your… you know.”
“can i say that i’m glad you did, or is that weird?” he asks with a breathy giggle.
your cheeks flush with heat, but you can’t disagree. “i’m glad too,” you admit, and the dopey grin on his face makes up for all the awkwardness ten times over.
you exhale slowly, finally feeling your body return to normal. you dread standing up—you’re not even sure if you’d be able to, after that—but for now it feels good to just lay here with jun’s head on your chest.
“so what about your channel?”
“i’ll delete it,” he rushes to say. “whatever you want me to do. i don’t care— i don’t want it anymore. all i want is you.”
you tuck a lock of hair behind his ear with a smile, feeling your cheeks glow from his praise. “well, i don’t want you to do that. all your loyal viewers will miss out on seeing you doing more than just jerking off alone.”
he raises an eyebrow at you, trying to understand if you mean what he thinks you mean. “like…?”
“like letting them watch you fuck your girlfriend?” you finish for him tentatively. even after everything tonight you still have doubts that you’ve misread his intentions, that maybe this is just a one-time thing to him and you don’t mean as much to him as he means to you.
he studies your face carefully. “is that what you are?” he asks hesitantly.
you nod slightly, the shyness from earlier suddenly rushing back in at the possibility of being rejected. “unless you didn’t want me to be.”
he shakes his head so fast it nearly gives you whiplash. “no— please. i do. so bad.”
you break out into a smile, cupping his face in your cheeks and leaning in to kiss his forehead. he hums, and the vibrations are warm against your chest . “you could’ve just asked me. like, years ago. would have avoided all the awkwardness of…”
“of you finding out i’m a porn star?”
you giggle, and he thinks it’s the most adorable sight he’s ever seen. lying naked in your arms together, making you laugh. “i thought you said you weren’t.”
he grins. “not really. but it makes me sound cooler when you say it.”
“i think you’re cool anyway, jun.”
he shifts and leans forward to capture your lips in his again, his mouth slow and tender as he kisses you this time. “i never wanna stop kissing you.”
you rub your thumbs across his cheeks, watching his fond expression that you know must be mirrored with your own. “then don’t.”
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i hope you enjoyed this!! if you did, consider reblogging or leaving a comment or an ask :) it shows me this is something people want to see more of, and knowing people like this makes me want to write more of it! thanks for reading!!
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neptuneiris · 8 months
Text
sparks (04/04)
But I promise you this I'll always look out for you
pairing: business-boyfriend!aemond x fem!reader
summary: at the beginning your relationship with aemond is perfect and there were no worries. until he becomes the Heir of his father's company, the most important in the whole country and certain events and certain people start to interfere in the relationship.
word count: 9.0k
previous part • next part • series masterlist
now yes, the epilogue is officially coming soon haha
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hello loves! hope you are having a wonderful day!
I made an announcement about the change in the story so if for some reason you didn't read it, don't worry, here I will explain again what happened:)
the reason why I decided to add a part 4 to the fic is very simple: the chapter was too long for the epilogue and when I say too long I mean really long. and I didn't want to bore you or fill you with too much, believe me that the epilogue was exaggeratedly long:(
I'm sorry if it wasn't what you expected, but I decided the best and I really hope you like it a lot, after all it's not the end yet😚
that's all, I won't keep you any longer, enjoy!
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Aemond Targaryen had never felt so miserable in his life.
The trip to Casterly Rock was one of the most important in his entire working career and yet it was the worst trip he had ever attended in his life.
His mind would not leave him alone and the urge to cry along with the anxiety and desperation he felt was too much. And it was so much that he couldn't control it.
But outside of that, he didn't care too much about the event, socializing and having conversations with other important businessmen, as if it wasn't something he did every day, nor did he attend to the press which was what he avoided the most nor did he care about Larys Strong and Alys Rivers.
He honestly didn't care about anything.
At least nothing outside of the important thing that was his meeting with his partner Jason Lannister and attending his conference with the board of directors.
He didn't care that this would later lead to 'serious consequences,' if you could call it that, with his grandsire.
Even after he caught up again with Jason Lannister and properly attended the conference with the board of directors, as soon as it was all over, he took his flight back to King's Landing in a needy and desperate manner.
And the first thing he did after landing was to look for you and try to talk to you. Although he must have known that you would not let him find you.
Your university is extremely large and although he tried to find you by asking the administration and coordination of your university for your varied schedule, they did not give him anything, as they cannot give out their students' personal and private information so openly to strangers.
They only do so on occasions that require it and are extremely necessary with hard evidence, such as to a family member of the student for an emergency or something like that.
And Aemond honestly didn't blame them, as he looked extremely desperate and like a madman, especially when they told him they couldn't give him that information.
So he went to your work, where he knew it would be easier to find you, but again… he was unsuccessful because you wouldn't let him.
"Uhm… I'm sorry, but she's not here."
Your coworker told him and judging by her face, he knew instantly that she was lying, especially by the pitiful face she was giving him amidst the assurance she wants to create by saying her words.
"Please, just tell her I need to talk to her," he tells her pleadingly, feeling like he will burst into tears at any second.
She lets out a long breath, as she looks away from his gaze for a moment, looking hesitant, nervous and even watching him with pity.
"I'm really sorry but… she hasn't presented for days now and I haven't really seen her."
"But I need to talk to her as soon as possible," he insists, sad and still with a hint of hope that he can fix this, "Do you know where I could find her after her classes and work?"
"I-I…" she starts to say nervously, biting her lips, then completely avoiding eye contact with him "I'm sorry but I don't know. Like I said, I haven't seen her, so I'm not aware of her plans after work."
He takes a deep breath, as he runs a hand through his hair and also over his face, feeling his heart beating too fast, losing patience, losing hope, feeling completely desperate and frustrated.
"Please," he begs, not knowing what else to do, "Please tell me. I really need to see her and talk to her. I'm worried."
Sophia, not knowing what else to say, can't help but feel uncomfortable and again averts her gaze from his.
"I'm sorry but I haven't seen her and I really don't know where she might be."
Aemond watches her for a few seconds without saying anything else even with his sad and desperate face, understanding perfectly that he wouldn't get anything from her about you.
He sees how she is more than willing to keep lying for you and even though he feels completely desperate and frustrated, he knows it's not her fault, so he decides not to push her too hard.
So he took a deep breath and tried to sound calmer.
"Okay, I understand, thank you," he says resignedly, "But if you see her, please tell her that I came looking for her and needed to talk to her," he tells her one last time, "Tell her to please consider it."
And Sophie nods with a sympathetic nod, still watching him with that pity.
"Sure, I will."
And he nods back.
"Thank you."
That time Aemond came out of the coffee shop completely disappointed, having the foolish hope that you would come out of hiding and stop him after the little show he gave to your coworker completely sad and desperate.
But of course, that didn't happen.
Upon returning to the apartment, nothing felt the same anymore. Aemond now all he feels now is a deep loneliness and sadness that eats him alive inside as he finds himself alone in that place, a place that was once home to him and you, where you both started a little life together as a couple.
With loneliness in his chest and in the middle of the apartment, he sees everything around him with his melancholic eye and face.
Everything now felt like a painful reminder of what he had lost.
The place is completely permeated with memories where every room and corner tells a story of his relationship with you.
The cushions on the couch where you used to cuddle and watch movies together, the kitchen island where you shared with each other your day to day separately and the kitchen where you made food or washed dishes together, laughing and talking about anything.
Aemond then goes to the bedroom, where he now sees your empty desk where there is no longer your laptop, your lamp and all those pens and markers with which you used to make notes for your classes, nor the various sheets and folders with which you used to do your projects and research.
So he understands why you decided to leave him, because even though it was never intentional and the least he wanted to do was hurt you, he still did.
Your vanity is also completely empty, where so many times you spent hours doing your makeup happy and energetic singing your favorite songs.
And other nights you would remove your makeup crying for him and because he never put a serious stop to his work by standing you up.
And as he looks at the bed, only the memories invade him more, beginning to feel his eye watering.
The two of you cuddling, him taking refuge in your arms after a stressful day at his job or you taking refuge in his arms after a stressful day at college. Also before bedtime, the two of you would talk about anything silly until you fell asleep, where the moment felt more intimate than anywhere else.
And Aemond loved those moments, as did you, where you both shared space on the comfort of your bed.
Aemond then wanting to return to the living room, he stops in the middle of the hallway looking at the door with a serious and at the same time pained expression, where he also remembers that day when you were here and he was at the entrance waiting for Cole, where everything happened.
But it's also where you both made love and showed that love to each other with that passion, with that affection and with that deep intimacy of just the two of you that was nothing ordinary or common.
You were just two people in love loving and enjoying each other with that complicity and that unique union that characterized them.
Letting out a huge breath, he then plops down on the couch, staring at a spot in the living room in silence, feeling completely alone and hopeless.
And he hates it.
He absolutely hates the feeling.
Just as he hates the feeling of emptiness in his heart that seems impossible to fill. Because he knows it can never be filled by anyone else. Only you.
And that's when Aemond starts to really break down, realization and acceptance slowly creeping into his mind, eating him alive, destroying him, leaving him with nothing.
Until it happens and in the midst of his silence and loneliness, he starts to cry without being able to help it anymore.
He hates everything, his job, his grandsire, the association with Alys Rivers, the press, absolutely everything and also himself, for letting you slip through his fingers and not doing anything more efficient from the beginning to avoid the breakup.
Because if he had, you would still be with him.
It's only until Aemond really feels miserable and like he can't breathe that he decides to call the only person who can get to him sooner, really not wanting to be alone, needing someone to be able to reassure him.
So he calls the one person he thinks might be able to help him and reassure him.
He would have called you, of that there is no doubt, you would be his first choice, but you have blocked him from everywhere, from every social media, calls and messages.
He would have called Hel too, but she's in Highgarden, Hells, he would have even called Aegon, but he's in Storm Ends.
"Yes, Aemond?"
Rhaenyra Targaryen answers on the other end of the call, and Aemond really can't formulate coherent sentences for every sob.
He tells her your name, that he can't find you, that you've blocked him from everywhere, he mentions his grandsire, the company, loneliness, sadness and that it all happened too fast, that he needs her and doesn't know what to do.
And soon after that Aemond says he doesn't want to be there anymore, so they both leave the apartment and with every step he takes away from the place that used to be a home for him, he feels an increasingly heavier weight than before in his heart.
Soon Rhaenyra arrives at the apartment to help her half brother, not asking him anything about what has him like this while he continues to cry and holds her hand tightly.
Rather Rhaenyra tries to reassure him by telling him that she is there for him.
It is only a matter of time before his entire family knows of his breakup with you, instantly Hel calling him, as does Aegon, Hel being the more surprised and incredulous of the two, wanting to know what has happened.
Since Aemond has no vacation and can't afford to miss work with a few extremely important and one hundred percent justifiable exceptions, he soon finds himself setting foot inside the building.
Though they both know, as does their whole family, that it was because of their grandsire and everything to do with the company, also because of Alys Rivers.
And they are not surprised when Aemond implies he had something to do with it, not saying anything else, clearly because he doesn't want to talk about it.
All his workers notice the down and serious mood of the next boss, as it is also noticeable that he doesn't want to talk to anyone and doesn't want anyone to talk to him more than necessary, so he just locks himself in his office to continue with his work.
But as soon as he starts his work day, inevitably having that hope by looking at his phone screen from time to time that you will call or text him, Eleanor calls him and warns him that he has a meeting in ten minutes with his grandsire.
This makes his mood worse, even though he knew it would only be a matter of time, but he reluctantly gets up and heads for the conference room.
And the moment Otto enters the room, clearly with his annoyed and frustrated face, the whole place fills with tension. And when Otto makes it clear to him that he is not happy at all, still Aemond maintains an emotionless and indifferent face.
"I can't believe how irresponsible you're being, truly."
Otto begins to say with incredulous surprise and a frown on his face, watching him completely annoyed.
"I asked you for one, just one thing on your trip to Casterly Rock."
"The only important thing on that trip was to attend my meeting with Jason Lannister and also the conference with the board of directors, in both of which I did perfectly well," Aemond says still completely indifferent.
"Don't you want to play dumb with me, Aemond," he warns him through his teeth, "You know perfectly well what I'm talking about."
"Look, I'm not in the mood for this right now—
"And you think I am?" he inquires instantly, "You think I'm not tired of telling you the same old thing over and over again?" he says annoyed, "Wasn't I clear with you when I told you I didn't want Rivers to cause a scene for me again because of you and what's the first thing she does when she comes back from that trip?"
"For fuck's sake, you close your fucking contract with her!"
Explodes Aemond annoyed against him without being able to control himself anymore, tired and annoyed of him, but of course Otto also responds in the same way.
"No, this is your job! She wants you, not me! And now that you're finally done with Y/N, you can do something about it, something more than necessary, but you do nothing!"
Then again something inside Aemond snaps at the mention of your name and the breakup, leaving him completely silent and watching his grandsire with his parted lips.
Everything in his mind is still fresh, his emotions are still running high and that he has mentioned the breakup as a good thing so that he can finally whore himself out to Alys without any guilt and restraint, as his grandsire has asked him to do, only makes his gaze turn dark and one of complete anger towards him.
And Otto, as he is looking him straight in the eye, notices that change within him and in his gaze, but he doesn't move, doesn't flinch, and continues firm.
"So you know."
Aemond says in a low but firm tone, watching him intently and without even blinking, even with that dark and determined look, making Otto watch him silently for a moment, then swallowing hard and finally speaking.
"Of course I know. Just because I'm not home much, doesn't mean I'm not informed of what's going on with my family."
"And you're happy now?"
He inquires him really without much emotion, with an incredibly calm and soft tone of voice that surprises Otto, while now Aemond's gaze reflects the slight pain, watching him completely attentively, being strong and as much as he can in front of him, clenching his jaw.
And Otto says nothing, just watches him, which Aemond considers him a coward, as what he wanted so badly has finally happened and he says nothing.
"I bet you do," he answers her question for him, watching him bitterly.
Otto lets out a long breath.
"Look, I know you cared about her, and I feel sorry for you, but the company—
"No, that's not true, you don't feel the slightest bit sorry for me," he interrupts him with a disinterested tone, "She broke up with me because of you, but also because of me. And I'm sure when you found out, you were so pleased and had more hope that I would finally do something about Rivers and the association," he says dispassionately.
"Aemond, I'm just asking you to be professional and fulfill your obligations as heir to this company. I'm asking you because I care about you and because you can't get stuck thinking about a girl, instead of your job, your company."
"Don't mention her," he tells her instantly serious and with a threatening tone and look, "I don't want you to talk about her, ever again."
Otto lets out a long breath.
"Rivers has given us a warning and a deadline for you to convince her to sign those papers. She's already upset and unpleasant enough thanks to you," he tells him seriously, "This whole process has gone on long enough, so either you act now or we lose her forever. And we're not going to have the conversation again about why it's important to partner with her company, are we?"
Aemond looks away from him, completely pissed off and annoyed, and then gets up from the swivel chair, intending to finally get the fuck out of here.
"I'm talking to you."
Otto tells him in a higher tone of voice, watching him seriously.
"Yes and I've heard enough."
"You will do as I have told you and you will do it now," he warns him.
Aemond scowls at him, then puts on an annoyed and more threatening face than before, placing his hands on the very expensive refined wooden table then leaning towards him as well with his threatening posture.
"You're not going to order me around anymore."
"Aemond, do you really want to force me to do something I don't really want to?"
"Don't worry, I know you really do want to and I honestly don't care. But believe me it wouldn't be good for you, after all… I remind you that you're forgetting your place."
The fight and silence builds the tension further, as Otto and Aemond stare menacingly and defiantly at each other, each with their differences being more than clear, when suddenly the door to the conferences bursts open.
This breaks all the tension and also draws the attention of both of them, who look towards the door and under the doorway stands Rhaenyra, whom Otto observes slightly surprised and completely confused.
"Sorry to interrupt," she says as she places a soft smile, "I hope it's not something important."
Aemond turns his gaze back to his grandsire for a moment with his jaw clenched, who continues to stare at Rhaenyra confused and this time with a questioning look, showing his annoyance at the sight of her.
"No, we were done," Aemond makes clear, his voice in a serious and low tone, to turn his gaze back to her.
"And what are you doing here?"
Otto inquires Rhaenyra, who is not surprised by his attitude towards her, as she is used to it and doesn't really care.
"I came to speak with Aemond," she says then turns her gaze to her half-brother, "Your secretary told me you were here and I thought maybe you could talk to me, if you're not busy."
He nods in her direction.
"Sure," and she nods back, waiting for him as well.
But Aemond turns his gaze to his grandsire, who also looks back at him, confused and questioning to see that in his gaze he still intends to fight him with his threatening posture.
Again they both stare at each other, where Otto stares at him completely serious without saying anything and Aemond continues threatening, completely serious.
"If you pay someone to notify all the press and all the media anonymously of my breakup with Y/N or tell only Rivers to take advantage of me, believe me I will publicly announce and tarnish your image about how you tried to whore me out to Rivers with proof."
He threatens and Otto gasps for a moment.
"And i will tell worse, that she was also seeking an intimate relationship with me, a woman who has almost my twenty years on me."
And without saying anything else, Aemond leaves the room together with Rhaenyra without waiting and without hearing any answer back from his grandsire, for the first time in a long time having won the fight and leaving him completely speechless.
"What? You thought I didn't know?" he asks, "She doesn't say her age and she doesn't look nearly forty, but she is, so we don't want any of that, do we?"
He observes him expectantly,
"It will be a disastrous scandal. And it won't be good for her, nor for you and the company. I also know it won't be good for me, my mother, my siblings or my entire family. But I will do it if you leave me no choice and I won't give a fuck, because it will all have been your fault," he makes it clear.
At that moment he feels liberated and empowered, as he has finally left him in his place and has not done what he always ordered her to do, while he experiences a sense of relief and renewed self-confidence.
But unfortunately, that feeling doesn't last forever. Or at least it doesn't last once he's outside the company walls.
And that's because he's still thinking and longing for you.
He tried a few more times to try to find you, asking all the people he and you have in common where you might be or where you live now saying he needed to talk to you, but no one would give him an answer, making him miserable.
Even at work, he couldn't concentrate, because all the time he was thinking about you and if he could do his work, it was all thanks to Eleonor, who would notice his tired face and the bags under his eyes, as well as notice how hard he was trying.
She would see him drinking coffee more than usual and it worried her, but knowing how stubborn he is, she knew there was nothing she could do.
And once he got home, no one knew the sadness and loneliness that consumed him completely.
Even sometimes when he couldn't sleep, he kept looking at the selfie of you and him on his phone screen that he hasn't taken down, both of you smiling and more than happy, instantly feeling the pain in his chest and the tears about to run down his cheek.
It's going on a month since you decided to end the relationship but Aemond is still haunted by the moments you both shared and the 'what ifs' that haunt his mind.
Every day, the pain of the breakup seems to increase rather than decrease. At every moment of distraction, also at work or doing the most ordinary thing in life, like making a coffee, Aemond gets lost in his thoughts, remembering you.
And in every memory, he blames himself for what had gone wrong, thinking of all the ways he could have acted differently and done more for both of you, for you.
And he couldn't accept that he would simply never see you again, that it was all over, he needs you and he needs you so badly every time he starts crying and blaming himself at the same time.
He feels completely trapped in the memory of what the relationship was and feels unable to get over you, the woman who had and still means everything to him.
It is not until Rhaenyra and her mother began to notice Aemond's instability and begin to worry about him that even Helaena decides to fly to King's Landing to be there for him, reporting everything to Aegon.
And fortunately Aemond doesn't push her away when she visits him by surprise, telling him that she has come to stay with him as long as necessary.
And he hugs her tightly and cries on her shoulder, asking her not to leave him alone, to please help him recover you, that he needs you, that he understands that everything was his fault but that he deserves at least one more conversation with you.
The people Aemond cares about are there for him, even Rhaenyra, but Helaena is the one who is almost all the time with him at home and also at the company, running the Highgarden company from there, helping him heal at the same time.
Unfortunately you never responded to Helaena's messages, neither to Baela's.
So even though it hurts Helaena to see her brother like this, she knows that you are hurt too, she knows your reasons why you did what you did and she doesn't blame you for it.
But Aemond can't.
And though he doesn't know it and doesn't even think about it, you are just as or worse off than he is, trying just as hard as he is to cope with the breakup, barely being functional in your day to day life and in having enough energy, being completely broken inside.
He is still immensely in love with you and every day that goes by and he doesn't see you or hear from you, it's complete torture.
He even stopped being seen in public and stopped attending events, focusing entirely on the company and nothing else.
It's not until another full month passes that one day, when Aemond wakes up to find Helaena in the kitchen with her face completely pale, her eyes wide open and her lips parted with her phone in hand, she gives him the news that he knew would happen someday but still takes him by surprise.
His father has died.
And he knows what that means, everyone knows.
He is the successor and literally overnight, he is now the boss, officially. And with that begins the real chaos for Aemond Targaryen.
It was a moment he was looking forward to but at the same time not because of the great responsibility that would fall on him, all the great weight.
But first of all, the whole Targaryen family is busy with a funeral and taking an indefinite rest, all of them and him especially hiding from the press and everyone.
1 month later
"So…
Speaks the calculated voice of Alys Rivers with a condescending tone, looking expectantly at Otto Hightower in front of her as she slowly turns in the swivel chair she is sitting in, having her uncle Larys Strong next to her, who in comparison to her is calmer.
"He won't show up?"
She inquires as she fiddles with the pen in her hand, twirling it between her fingers with her perfectly painted dark scarlet fingernails, raising an eyebrow in Otto's direction.
"Of course he will, he knows how important this is to us," he tells her immediately, "It's just that with the death of his father, he and his siblings still need a little more time. It's been very recent still."
"We still mourn the death of Viserys Targaryen," Larys Strong says in a soft tone and Otto nods in his direction.
But Alys is not at all pleased, for months now.
"We've been waiting for almost fifteen minutes."
"Yes, I know, I'm sorry, honestly—
The door suddenly opens, interrupting Otto and drawing the attention of the three in the conference room who turn their heads and see Aemond entering the room unhurriedly and calmly.
"Sorry for the delay," he says as he approaches his place, "I was taking an important call."
Rivers instantly looks at him in a penetrating manner as she continues to fiddle with the pen in her fingers, while his grandsire watches him seriously.
"More important than this?" hisses Otto quietly through his teeth.
And still not caring, he takes a seat to adopt an equally nonchalant posture, looking even annoyed that he has to be in this room with these people, causing Rivers stress and frustration, as well as his grandsire for his attitude and lack of interest.
"Yes."
Aemond replies to him without dissimulation and without caring.
"I don't think you have understood the gravity of the matter, Mrs. Targaryen," Alys Rivers speaks, catching the attention of the three, looking directly at him, "I gave you a deadline to sign the association papers and you still haven't given me one good reason why my company should be associated with yours."
Aemond shrugs, observing her indifferently.
"That my company is the most important, innovative and efficient in the entire country is not reason enough for you?"
"That's not what I meant."
"We're talking about business and what's in the best interest of our companies, aren't we?"
Rivers clenches her jaw.
"I think you know perfectly well that a partnership requires more than that, it's also about building interpersonal relationships."
"As far as I know, you are a co-owner of Riverlands Group and the one who actually founded the company was you, Larys Strong," he observes the man, "You shouldn't decide if you want to sign these papers or not?"
Otto throws daggers at him with his eyes and an utterly deadly stare, but Aemond doesn't even notice, as well as Rivers starts to get annoyed. So before Larys Strong can speak, she speaks first.
"We both work as a team and make decisions together," she tells him instantly, wanting to make it clear.
"You seem to make all the decisions."
"Aemond—
"As far as I know, it's not in your best interest to lose this opportunity to be able to partner with my company," Rivers speaks with a firmer, more serious and determined tone, "And I've been very patient and accessible for months now."
"Also as far as I know, months ago we attended an event together and it was you who announced how proud you were to have a partnership between us in process to everyone, yet you are the one who hasn't signed the papers, so what exactly is it that you need or want from me or the company for you to sign them?"
He dares in asking with a challenging tone and look, watching her completely intently, wanting to know how bold she is, pushing her a little to say or not to say what she really wants from him.
As Otto hides in his chair and holds a hand to his face, not being able to believe this is really happening.
And Rivers looks completely serious and annoyed at Aemond, who starts to look amused by his lack of response. So the next thing he does is point to the contracts on the table in front of him, extending them to both of them.
"So… do we have a deal or not?"
He inquires, not wanting to waste any more time and wanting to get this over with once and for all, watching them expectantly.
Strong and Rivers exchange a glance, where Rivers still has his serious and annoyed look, but also has something else on his mind after fully analyzing this new Aemond now that he is he boss.
So he silently nods in his uncle's direction, making Strong extend his hand to place the papers in front of him to sign them.
But just as his fingertips touch the paper, Aemond abruptly puts them back in front of him, leaving them out of his reach, drawing the attention of all three instantly and more so of his grandsire who already feels completely relieved after so much.
But Aemond's attitude is alarming just then.
"Before you sign, I need to tell you something important."
All three of them frown, especially his grandsire.
"And it can't be after the two finally sign?" he inquires without having the patience for any more of this.
Aemond lets out a long breath, looking at his grandfather and then Rivers directly, wanting to be completely clear with his words.
"I want you to know that in another occasion I would have really appreciated having the opportunity to work with you and partner with your company, I really would," he tells her honestly, "But you never acted the right way, neither did you," he turns to his grandsire to focus back on Rivers, pausing slightly, "So I don't need this association anymore."
Surprise and disbelief completely takes over the three of them, but more so on Rivers and Otto, who exchange confused and puzzled looks.
"Aemond, what are you saying?" his grandsire inquires.
"I'm saying that I don't care and I'm not going to do what you tell me anymore nor am I going to let people like you intrude into my personal life," he then tells Rivers with determination.
Rivers looks at him completely offended.
"Me intruding in your personal life? What are you talking about?"
"I think you know perfectly well what i'm talking about, so since you have nothing more to do here, I'm sorry for wasting too much of your time, but you can go now."
His grandsire looks at him in complete surprise and disbelief.
"Aemond—
"If you think I'm going to sit here and allow this treatment of me by you, you are very wrong, I will not tolerate it for another second," Rivers says, getting up from her chair, annoyed and offended, "You need me but this is your loss. Let's see how long it takes before your company goes bankrupt and you lose everything."
Aemond lets out a bitter laugh.
"No, in fact I don't need you," he makes it clear, amused, "And if I needed you, believe me I wouldn't have partnered with you even as my last option," he tells him decisively, "Do you think you're the only company that has partnerships with Essos? Not only you, but also Rodrik Greyjoy, the owner of the Pike company in the Iron Islands, my new partner".
He says and Otto Hightower looks on in complete surprise, not expecting that at all. And this only causes more anger and indignation in Alys Rivers.
"You're going to regret this," Rivers tells him humiliated and annoyed as she grabs her purse and then heads for the exit with big strides, "And my company is never going to be associated with yours, ever!"
"Have a nice day."
Aemond tells her not forgetting his manners and the doors slam shut with a loud slam that still doesn't completely flinch, then looks at his grandfather who looks like he's going to explode at any moment.
"You can leave too," he tells her nonchalantly, rising from his seat, "I've had enough of this shit. I expect your resignation by tomorrow at the latest."
"My resignation?" he repeats, completely bewildered and surprised.
"Yes, your resignation," he affirms him" "Rhaenyra will now take your place while Daemon is left running Dragonstone."
"W-what…? Aemond, you can't do this! I helped you, I supported you, I broke my back for you, I made you what you are now and I put you where you are!"
"Actually yes I can and in fact I already have," he says dispassionately, heading for the exit, "I'm the boss now."
And even hearing their protests and shouts, he leaves the room with him following, causing a huge scene, but once he makes his way to his office, he slams the door in his face and asks Cole to take him out of here immediately and he instantly complies with his order.
And when Aemond sits in his chair, he lets out a long sigh and closes his eye as he drops his head completely on the backrest, no longer feeling that weight on his shoulders and that tension he felt every day all over his body, finally feeling free, relieved and at peace.
It honestly feels good, after so long.
And he sees the positives of him finally being the boss, as he can now do these kinds of things, things he couldn't do before and finally give him that needed balance to his life and work.
But as soon as he leaves his work space and gets home, he again feels that emptiness in his chest and that sadness, not feeling full and like him, knowing full well that you are missing for his life to finally be perfect.
He wishes he could have done all this with you by his side. He still wants to fix everything between him and you, but you being off his radar, it's just impossible.
And he still loves you too much to use money to try to find out where you are, knowing he couldn't do that to you, the woman he still loves with every fiber of his body and heart.
He still misses you, very much. He wants to have one more reason to be this new person he has become, a better person really.
But he respects your decision, even though he still thinks he deserved more.
That same day he sends a message to Helaena asking her when she will come to King's Landing and if she wants to stay with him at his house and that same day at night he receives a message from Floris Baratheon, a friend he and you have in common, finally things being in his favor.
The moment he so deserved arrives when Floris invites him to a pub in the center of the city to celebrate his birthday. And since he knows you and Floris are close friends, he knows you'll be there.
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You thank the driver for dropping you off at your destination after paying him, then you get out of the car, close the door and head towards the entrance of the pub that Floris has chosen to celebrate his birthday.
Today you don't know what's wrong with you, as you suddenly have a very positive mood and attitude that hasn't been seen in you for months, clearly since what happened that day.
But today you have all the willingness to have fun, celebrate with Floris, have a couple of drinks and see what else the night takes you to, you really need it.
So you open the door of the pub to enter, instantly ringing that typical bell that announces a new customer, which draws the attention of some people already inside the place, but you focus on finding Floris and his friends at all the scattered tables.
"Y/N!"
Suddenly someone shouts your name and you turn your head, seeing that it's Floris, calling you from the table they are at and you start to smile, about to head towards all of them, when suddenly, your gaze crosses with a blue eye that you know all too well among all the people at the table.
A blue eye you haven't seen for months.
And your whole world around you fades away.
You freeze completely and a shiver runs down your entire back as you stare at him in shock, attentively and with your lips parted, definitely not expecting to see him, at all.
Your heart starts pounding, your legs turn to jelly and your throat goes dry. You don't know what to do, let alone what to say, you just can't speak or react, nothing.
You don't feel any more that mood of before, that disposition and that attitude, you simply feel like a little girl who wants to hide behind her mother's legs.
The memories of the relationship, the happy moments, the painful moments, everything you went through together comes back to you in an instant. Just as you remember that day, when it all ended, feeling sick to your stomach, suddenly no longer feeling strength in your whole body.
You feel completely trapped in a sea of emotions flooding your mind. The feelings that you had tried to suppress for months, now overwhelm you.
But not only does your whole history with him come back to you, you are also affected by seeing him again physically after so many months because you had not even seen him through a photo on the social media after the breakup.
And to see him now after the passing of his father and that he is now the owner of the most important company in the country, is just more of a surprise for you.
You try not to let the surprise be so noticeable on your face, although you probably already failed at it, seeing now his gorgeous short platinum hair, giving him a completely different air and look, although not in a bad way.
So you assume that those are the reasons why now he has changed. You can't say the same for yourself as he has really changed, physically.
You had never imagined an Aemond with his hair cut short, you never thought about it and now seeing it… it makes you feel a sensation all over your body that you really can't explain.
He looks more… mature and like… an expert in business, which is what he really is. He looks even younger for his age, also more handsome. He looks like a big businessman.
Unable to help yourself, you still can't move, just standing there, clearly affected after seeing your ex-boyfriend again, who Floris immediately jumps to your rescue, while at the same time you see how Aemond says something under his breath to Liam, a friend of his and also yours, to then get up and head towards the bathroom without looking any further in your direction.
You follow him with your gaze, swallowing hard and starting to tremble, while Floris stops in front of you with a small reassuring smile.
"Hey, I'm so happy you came."
She hugs you and you let her, as you really need it and she knows you need it too.
"Easy," she murmurs comfortingly in your ear, "You've got this, take a deep breath."
You blink, as if to clear your thoughts that way, then drop your head defeatedly on her shoulder, inhaling deeply, as she has told you to.
"I'm sorry," she tells you with some pity, feeling your body tense, "The guys mentioned it to him but he said I still wouldn't tell him anything, so in order not to make him feel bad, I decided to invite him too," she tells you sadly.
"No, no, it's okay."
You tell her instantly, turning away to watch her, seeing Floris as your eyes are full of emotions and with effort, you try to nod and understand her, although you really do, since after all, Floris is not only your friend, she is also his friend and you can't blame her, you would never do that.
"I-I… I… I know, I just… I didn't expect it," you confess, trying to compose yourself.
At least he's out of your sight now and that helps a little but still, you know he'll be back soon.
Floris takes your hands gently, offering you his physical support that she hoped would be enough for you in comforting you.
"I know it's all still very fresh in your mind, so if you need to leave, that's fine with me, I'll understand perfectly, don't worry."
"No, no, I mean, yes, it all still feels very fresh but…" you let out a long breath, "Sooner or later it was bound to happen, you know? And it's your birthday!" you exclaim out of nerves, "I-I can't just leave, I-I…" you bite your lips, "Happy birthday, by the way."
Floris smiles.
"Thank you bestie."
You smile back as best you can, still feeling your mind working at full speed, your body feels it more tense than usual and you unconsciously keep on the lookout for him, because he might come back at any second.
You give her the gift you bought for her, then she gives a few words of motivation and finally she leads you with almost everyone to the table.
You greet old friends and also meet other friends of Floris, trying to look calm and relaxed at all times, when in reality, inside you are a bundle of nerves and not calm at all, not at all.
You can see that all your friends… and Aemond's friends too, know that he and you are no longer together, which causes you some discomfort, but for Floris, you decide to face it, him too.
"At any point in the evening you can leave if you need to, really," she reassures you again before you take a seat and you nod in her direction, understanding.
Meanwhile Aemond in the bathroom leans fully into the sink as he breathes through his mouth and closes his eye for a moment, trying to calm himself, letting a sigh escape his lips.
He honestly doesn't understand what has happened to him.
He thought he could, that this is all he's ever wanted so he could have you back with him, but… when he barely laid his eye on you the moment you walked into the place with five meters in front of him, he felt like he was going back to the past.
For all these months, even yesterday, I was waiting for this moment. He was waiting to see you again, to try to talk to you, to try to get you back and now?
He just felt like a scared little boy.
His heart broke into pieces again as he remembered that day, when you decided to break up with him.
And how he felt at that moment, besides the weeks after when he tried to look for you and you wouldn't let him and blocked him from everywhere, he relived it again, feeling every emotion, remembering every tear he shed and all the other pressures he had on him because of his grandsire.
Not to mention the death of his father and his promotion in the company, all in a matter of days, making everything worse.
And although everything is totally different now, he still recognizes that he did not prepare for this moment.
Everything still hurts him, he no longer feels capable, he feels that you will break his heart again, although no more than he broke yours, where he did nothing about it, he only asked for forgiveness, as if that was enough.
Aemond looks at his reflection and tells himself that he must keep calm, keep his posture and not make this any more uncomfortable than it already will be.
But at all times he has this longing in his heart to be able to get you back.
While you now find yourself sitting, having a place at the big table, basically at the other end, away from where he is sitting, trying to calm yourself down from now on, although it is costing you a lot.
And not a moment too soon, Floris places a beer in your hand, murmuring in your ear that your mind needs to stop thinking and worrying too much.
And just as you take a sip, Aemond returns.
You try not to look at him too much, just the same way he tries not to look at you too much as he takes a seat next to Liam again, but unconsciously it's impossible.
The table by the others is full of laughter, while the pub is full of music, with a party atmosphere that really contrasts with your whirlwind of emotions and also with his.
Even though you don't want to, yet when he doesn't notice, you watch him. And this frustrates you. You want to enjoy Floris' birthday, but you can't help the tension you emanate along with him even though they are extreme to extreme.
Every time his gaze meets yours, you avert yours to the other side, nervous and alert, telling yourself that you can't let this disturb you for the entire time you'll be here.
"We're just here to celebrate Floris."
You repeat to yourself in your mind constantly.
On the other side, Aemond's mind doesn't stop spinning. Every time his eye meets yours, he feels a knot in his stomach and in order not to feel too much, he takes a sip of his beer as well and tries to appear unconcerned.
You both feel completely vulnerable, you don't want to make the atmosphere more tense and uncomfortable, so you make an effort to think about Floris and his friends.
You try to distract yourself by talking to other friends, talking to Floris and observing the whole place, but Aemond is always on your mind.
And even though you shouldn't, you ask yourself inevitable questions, unable to control it.
How is he doing?
How is he coping with the fact that he is now the boss?
Did he suffer a lot because of his father's death?
Must he hate me for ending things with him like that?
Did the association with Alys Rivers' company happen?
You let out a long breath, hating your mind at that moment, but you also inevitably begin to answer those questions with assumptions.
You assume he must be fine, since he's here, which surprises you since he didn't have time for almost anything before, so his new position at the company must give him a little more free time, although you don't really know.
You think about whether he must hate you for breaking his heart in such a cruel way, taking advantage of the fact that he had to leave to get on his plane and you guess he must still be seeing Rivers, even the breakup probably made things easier.
You bite the inside of your cheek and scold yourself, since you don't really know anything and take a long swig from your beer bottle, having had enough of you.
Aemond, on his own, in his mind was trying to find a reason or a good excuse to approach you, but he couldn't find the right moment. He wished the words would flow naturally, but every time he imagined a conversation, he felt blocked and unable to utter a word.
As the night progresses, the tension between the two persists, but fortunately it also becomes a little more bearable.
Although you have not spoken and have only exchanged glances, you had taken an important step in facing the past in that same place. But although the purpose was to have fun, neither he nor you did, it was impossible and you just sat in your places for Floris, nothing else.
Luckily everyone else didn't feel uncomfortable or tense because of you two, as little by little the table fills up with more drinks, the guys and he also smoke, the music helps and most of them are getting drunk, except him and you.
Until the hours go by, it's a little past midnight and already some people are starting to leave, Floris' night of celebration slowly coming to an end.
When only Floris, Liam, Sarah, Jenna, him and you are left, therefore, Floris considers the night over. And that's your cue to leave, so you say goodbye to her and everyone except him, taking the opportunity to leave the pub as you see him busy asking for a cigarette.
As you leave the pub, you lean against the wall with your phone in hand and the Uber app on the screen, waiting for a driver to accept your ride, but it keeps asking you to wait every long minute, making you feel desperate and worried.
You know it's only a matter of time before they and he come out and see you here and that's what you don't want.
But luck in that regard is not in your favor.
After continuing to wait for five more long minutes, you grunt under your breath in frustration as the application doesn't tell you anything, besides it's too much to ask for but you don't blame that either as you recognize that your dorm is far from here and you also take the time into consideration.
When then, Floris and all of them leave the pub, instantly her and also him noticing you.
Floris instantly turns to you and you give her a tired and distressed look.
"What's wrong?" she asks you in a low voice.
You bite your lips as you stare at your phone in frustration and answer her in a low voice as well.
"No driver accepts my ride. I don't know what to do."
"Well, Aemond has offered to drive us," she tells you with some caution and even in a low voice, "I'm sure he'll have no problem driving you too."
And here's just what you didn't want.
"No, I-I…" you let out a long breath, "Maybe I should try another app or walk a little further."
"Have you lost your mind?" she reproaches you in a whisper.
"I'm not going to ask him to drive me too," you clarify, frustrated and sad, "I've had enough."
"Come on, Y/N. I'll ask him."
Aemond, actually hears everything from a distance and realizes the situation, so he notices how Floris watches him and also how you try to watch him from the corner of your eye, noticing how you move your fingers across the screen of your phone in a desperate way.
And just then Liam speaks in his direction.
"I don't think we're all going to fit," he tells him as he points to his car.
He lets out a long breath as he pulls his keys out of his pocket, unlocking the doors.
"Get in, everyone."
He says in his voice loud enough for everyone and especially you to hear, without even looking at you, he also says it with a nonchalant tone, then starts across the street, heading to his car, which is big and spacious enough for everyone.
He listens as you and Floris speak again, but it's not so audible to him anymore, with the others following him to the car as well.
Tonight hasn't been the best, neither was the way you both ended it, but he still cares about you and your well-being, as there was no way he was going to leave you here alone, at almost two in the morning.
And when he gets in the car, he thought he would have to stand still, waiting for you, to the point of having to tell you himself that he will drop you off at home, but in the end he sees you following Floris with a look that he can't really describe.
Liam gets in as co-pilot and all the girls settle in the back seats, you too.
And pretty soon he's driving through the city, watching you in the rearview mirror from time to time, unable to help himself, while you watch him too when he doesn't notice, biting the inside of your cheek and feeling completely nervous.
And you don't know if it was intentional, but it really wasn't, Aemond just started asking for directions and those who had their houses closest to them spoke, leaving Sarah first, then Floris, Liam and at the end there's Jenna and you.
"My dorm is in Walden Residence, it's on the first block of the university," she indicates to Aemond and then she looks at you, "You live in a dorm too?"
You nod, feeling unable to speak.
"In which residence?"
You swallow hard, as you lick your lips.
"Westbridge."
"Oh! Then you'll drop me off first, her dorm is further in the back," she says to Aemond, who starts the car again.
Oh fuck.
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fake-bleach · 4 months
Note
omg omg loved the derek fic so much, i’ll be anxiously waiting for part two ❤️🫶🏻
million dollar man | derek danforth x reader - part 2
thank you so much anon!!! so glad you liked it! :') hope you enjoy this part! <3
word count: 3.5k
warnings/disclaimers: (18+ only!) fem!reader (no use of y/n), one reference to being high, use of pet names (baby, sweetheart, girl, etc), making out/kissing, hickeys on reader, explicit consent, descriptive fingering & oral (f receiving), overstimulation (in a way), filthy dirty talk, praise w/ hardly any degradation, established control by derek, tiny bit angsty, cute fluff w/ a happy ending <3
for the biggest derek fucker i know, @sugarevans: i hope you love it just as much as i loved writing it for you 🤍
ao3 link | masterlist
read part 1 here! a lot of things might not make sense if you haven't :)
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You never thought you’d ever be in this position.
Making out with Derek Danforth; hands gripping every inch of your body, high out of your mind, is something most wouldn’t ever imagine doing.
Yet, here you were, doing just that.
And hell, was it better than you ever imagined.
His lips were like fire on yours, burning you up and up the more he hungered for your kiss and touch. He was eager; desperate to taste you and everything you had to offer, something that he’s wanted for as long as he could remember.
Ever since he first saw you, he knew what he wanted, and now that he could finally have it? Nothing was stopping him.
“D-Derek,” You gasped once his lips pulled away from yours, giving you a second to breathe as your back pressed into the luxurious couch, his body on top of you, “You’re okay with this, right?”
You wanted to make sure, despite how eager you were yourself. You couldn’t help but overthink it, fighting between not wanting to give yourself to the selfish man in front of you, and wanting to give yourself up completely.
Now, all of those months convincing yourself that you didn’t want him were for nothing.
And, God, were you fucking okay with that.
He gave you a grin, letting out a small chuckle as he shook his head, almost as if you were crazy for even asking him that. “Been waiting for this forever, baby.. ‘Course I fucking am,” He breathed out, pressing kisses on your lips that slowly began to trail downwards; to your cheek, your jaw, then your neck, sending chills throughout your entire body.
You were sensitive when it came to his touch, and along with his kisses, his wandering hands couldn’t help but feel for every single part of you. One of his forearms held him up, keeping him steady as the other reached for your jaw, lifting your head up so he could have more access to your skin.
You shuddered at the feeling of his soft lips on your neck, forcing a light moan out of your mouth as he started to suck and lick, warning you of a feeling that was all too familiar.
You breathed heavily, letting out a small, “Wait,” as you attempted to relax. “I c-can’t.. go out like that if you.. do that,” You protested, hoping he understood what you meant.
And that, he did.
He pulled away for a split second, eyes looking up at you as he asserted himself confidently, the same Derek you’ve always known. “Yeah, you can, baby. Need to make sure everyone knows you’re mine now. That clear?”
You lick your lips, opening your mouth to protest again, but you don’t get very far. He tuts his tongue, expressing his disapproval as the action forces your mouth shut, “Nuh uh. You’re gonna let me do this, sweetheart. Been waiting too long now,” The hand on your jaw grips it just enough to make you focus on him, “Do I make myself clear?” He says, pausing with each word to enunciate it.
You nod immediately, every ounce of resistance you had in you disappearing as butterflies filled your stomach.
Normally, you’d put up a fight and maybe even walk out of a circumstance like this; But, you’d be lying to yourself if you said you didn’t like this side of him.
The Derek that just takes and takes. Nothing you can say no to, and willingly, you’d allow.
“Need to hear you,” He instructs, voice stern as his eyes lock into yours. Derek may be the type to always want control, but he wouldn’t ever do anything you weren’t completely okay with.
You exhale softly and nod again, complying, “Crystal clear.” Your eyes flicker from his lips, lingering there for a moment before finding his eyes again, “Make me yours.”
The strict expression on his lips immediately shifts into a smirk, those words giving him every ounce of motivation to finish what he started.
He pushes himself up for a second and presses one long kiss to your lips, filthy and passionate as ever, muttering, “That’s my girl,” before finding himself back on your neck, doing exactly what he’s intended to do for months.
With your heavy breaths and gasps of his name filling his ears, he accomplishes the task easily; leaving a trail of hickeys all around your neck and cleavage, hands gripping your tits through your shirt. The swelling of the marks that his lips captivate leave you wanting more.
More than just his lips.
You take the chance to stop him, gently pushing his head away as you whine softly, “Need more, Derek.”
He shushes you, nearly reading your mind as he begins to lower himself, keeping eye contact with you. He lifts your shirt up as he moves, exposing your stomach to press kisses along the skin, until he finally reaches the one spot he’s fantasized about for so long.
The action and the thought of what he might do to you leaves your body shuddering, anticipating his next move. You’d let him do anything he wanted now.
He slowly unbuttons your pants, taking his time as if his eyes were memorizing every second of it. You help him slip them off, lifting your hips so he can easily remove them, the cool air in the room hitting your exposed skin. You feel yourself grow wetter, desperate for him to do something, anything to you.
He takes no time to waste putting your pants aside, kneeling in between your thighs and spreading your legs. His gaze flickers from your face down to your panties, chest moving up and down as he processes the sight in front of him; your darkening eyes, legs wide open for him. 
Oh, what a beauty you are.
You await his next move, biting your bottom lip as you feel your core tighten, and he finally moves; taking his hand and sliding his fingers over your clothed cunt just for a second, feeling you for the first time. You shudder, gasping at his touch as your arousal seeps through your panties. You’re growing impatient, squirming with need.
“F-Fuck, Derek, touch me, please,” You whine, hips moving a bit to get any type of friction. He just presses down on your stomach, keeping you still as he tuts. “Shh, baby. Gonna take my fuckin’ time with you. Make you feel real good, yeah?” He states, using his other hand to cup it over your cunt.
It makes you gasp, body shaking from the sudden contact again. You press your lips together, quickly nodding as you accept his terms. You couldn’t possibly say no, anyways.
“Now,” He pauses, “Close that pretty mouth of yours n’ take what I give you,” He mutters sternly, but he isn’t done. “I’m gonna tell you what I’m gonna do to you, and you’re gonna be a good girl for me. Is that right?” He asks, fingers rubbing ever so softly against you.
You nod, shakily agreeing as you hold back from moving, “T-That’s right.”
He grins. “Good. You’re real pretty when you listen to me.”
You breathe shakily, stomach fluttering from his words and watching as he lowers to lay himself directly in between your thighs, hands now gripping them with his head facing you.
“Am I not when I don’t?” You retort, taking your chance to bite back.
He chuckles, “You know you’re more than pretty, baby.. I just like you like this more.”
You wouldn’t expect any less from him and his need for you.. And, if anything? It makes you want to be more like this for him.
“Giving yourself up to me..” He hums, caressing your thigh sensually and slowly, eyes devouring you, “Now, doesn’t that feel so much better?”
Before you can respond, his thumb slides from your inner thigh to slip underneath your panties, feeling for your slick slit as you hiss at the sudden contact, skin to skin. Fuck, he was unpredictable.
You gasp softly, walls involuntarily clenching around nothing. The way he was talking to you.. It was driving you crazy.
“No more talking back, no more excuses.. Now that I got you like this, honey. Just how it should be.. How you’re meant to be.” He continues, making your heart race. You were giving yourself up to him the more he spoke; the more he made you realize just how much you needed him, too.
The powerful, superior version of yourself.. crumbling all by the hands of the man who wants to see you break.
“Here’s what’s gonna happen, sweetheart..” He tells you, eyes on your face as his thumb slides through your folds, “’M gonna eat you out and make you cum on my tongue..”
The tip of his thumb sinks inside of you, forcing a moan out of your mouth. You need more, breathing heavily as you process his words, envisioning all the things he’s putting inside of your head.
“And then, I’m gonna do it.. Again, and again, until you can’t anymore.”
His thumb then slips out of you, moving and using his fingers to hook itself at the hem of your panties, pulling them off of you roughly. It’s quick and seamless, leaving you completely exposed for him, legs spread wide enough for him to fix on your glistening core immediately.
His fingers glide in between your throbbing lips, soaked beyond your control as he grunts at the sight and feeling. “Fuck yeah, baby.. So fuckin’ wet, shit.”
He can hardly control himself, slowly inserting two of his thick, long fingers inside of you, the lewd sound coaxing a laugh out of his throat. He pumps his fingers deliberately, eyes indecisive on where to linger; your face or your cunt. He picks the latter, gaze fixed on your walls gripping his digits, memorizing the way you take them, squelching and slick with your arousal.
Your pants drive his movements faster, moaning his name softly as your core tightens each time his fingers slowly begin to fill you to the hilt, knuckle-deep inside of you. 
You whine loudly, incoherent noises escaping your lips as you look down at him, squirming. “There we go, baby.. Look at how good you’re takin’ it.. pretty pussy begging for more.” He praises, taking his sweet time to pull his fingers out of you, watching how your hole closes from how empty you are.
Before you can register the feeling, he leans forward, sticking out his tongue to lick a stripe against your folds, the tip of it hitting your swollen clit. It makes your body jolt, the shock of the sensation igniting your nerves. It’s been a long fucking time since you’ve felt this good.
He moans out, breath hitting your cunt as it sends shivers down your spine. “Tastes fuckin’ good, baby.. Gonna fuck you with my tongue now, yeah?” He mutters, words hardly coherent enough for you before he latches his mouth around your clit, sucking it softly. 
You cry out at the feeling, involuntarily squirming away as it overwhelms you. He was so fucking quick; desperate and needy. Before you could pull away from him, his arms wrap around your thighs, roughly pulling you close. He traps you with his hold, tongue now exploring your folds and devouring you like a starved man.
“Derek! O-Oh, fuck!” You groan, shutting your eyes tightly as your body overtakes you, short and quick breaths filling his ears. You feel him chuckle, sending small vibrations through your core as he slides his tongue inside of your hole, thrusting it in and out of you. His thumb then moves up to your clit, rubbing slow, deliberate circles against it, wanting to feel you shake.
And, you do, as your walls clench around his tongue, body writhing hastily, overwhelmed with pleasure and that familiar build growing inside of you. Your hand reaches for his hair, gripping the bleached locks that give you a single ounce of control.
Your grasp allows you to push his face further into your cunt, grinding yourself against his mouth as you chase your high, crying his name out as if it were the only word you knew. Your stomach fills with warmth, breaths quickening as you cum shakily on his tongue without any warning.
You moan out his name one last time, convulsing around him as you increasingly grow sensitive, releasing your grip on his hair. He doesn’t let up though, and your nerves gradually become delicate, forcing a whine out of you; a protest. “N-No.. No more, Derek, fuck, I c-can’t, please.” You stammer out, trying to writhe away from his grasp.
He only takes a second to pull away from you, shaking his head disapprovingly as he pulls you back to him, reestablishing his grasp on your thighs even tighter than before.
He looks up at you, eyes hungry for more, “That was only one, honey. Not enough. C’mon, know you can give me another, yeah.. Just one more..” He encourages you, using one of the hands wrapped around your thigh to give it small rubs, soothing your trembling body.
Your body involuntarily twitches, overstimulated from your first orgasm and the continuous contact on your skin. You just nod at him though, letting out a small “okay” so he can verbally hear it; something you’re starting to know that he likes from you.
He grins up at you, evidently satisfied at your actions. “There we go, you’re getting it now.. Such a good fucking girl.”
His praises cause your face to heat up, his approval of you becoming the one thing you never thought you’d need from him.
Turns out, you’re finding out a lot of things about yourself tonight that you didn’t know.
You take a deep breath in preparation, watching one of his arms unrestrain your thigh, hand moving towards your core. He glances back to your face, then to your pussy, pressing the tip of his index and middle finger to your entrance. You watch his face as he licks his lips, pressing them in slowly, almost excruciatingly slow.
You whine, the force of his fingers making your walls constrict around them, and your heart beats rapidly everywhere. You’re still tight, and he can feel it too.
He lets out a laugh as his eyes flicker to your face to watch it twist, and it feels mean. “You’re still so fucking tight, holy shit,” He chuckles again, fingers pulling out of you to rest against your hole, and shoving it back in deliberately. You cry out his name, incoherent words spilling out of your lips as you squirm away from him again.
He mutters out, “No, no, no, stay here, baby, come on,” and his large arm reaches to grip your waist, pulling you back to him once again. His forearm stays against your stomach now, pinning you into the couch so you can’t possibly move away. “Yeah, yeah, there y’go.” He draws out.
“Just gotta let yourself go, sweetheart.. Don’t fight it, c’mon..”
Your eyes shut tightly, and you listen to him, letting yourself go. The control in your body begins to fade, and he takes it as a sign to continue; fucking his thick fingers back into your cunt with an increasing pace and force.
You feel so full with him, but just as you think that, he adds a third finger, stretching you out further as he quickens his thrusts.
The lewd noises fill the room, your soaked folds flowing onto his hand and growing louder the faster he moves. Your pussy takes his fingers eagerly, engulfing them seamlessly. “Wish you could see what I’m seein’, honey.. Your cunt gripping every inch of my fucking fingers, fuck, so fuckin’ pretty. Doing so good, baby, I know it feels so good, huh?” His words are too much for you, along with his fingers moving so fast from how soaked you were. 
They start to pound into that one spot inside of you that has you seeing stars, and you convulse around them, body twitching, but hardly affecting Derek from his harsh grip on you. It keeps you still for him, never stopping his moves as he lets out whispers of encouragement to you, praising you absentmindedly and breathing heavily against your cunt.
“Yeah, yeah, give it to me, baby, cum on my fucking fingers, please.” He whines out, his hips grinding against the couch, almost as if he was getting off to your own pleasure. You shake against him, chest heaving up and down as that heat in your core builds and builds, finally releasing as you climax with his name on your tongue.
You nearly scream it, unable to control yourself as your eyes roll to the back of your head, your walls clenching around his fingers over and over again uncontrollably. He stops his movements now, letting you come down from it slowly, pulling his fingers out of you as you tremble.
As you take deep breaths, heartbeat slowing, you flutter your eyes open to look at Derek, watching as he inserts his fingers in his mouth to taste you. He pulls them out with a pop and moves himself to lay over you, using his clean hand to move your hair out of your face.
He praises you, pressing a small kiss to your forehead with his eyes looking at you with so much pride. “Did so fucking good for me, baby. Knew you could do it, fuck yeah.” He hums, now pressing a kiss to your lips.
You accept it greedily, placing your hands on his chest, wanting to be as close to him as possible. Your feelings for him were overwhelming; one night of pleasure causing you to confront every thought & emotion you’ve ever had of him. And the way he was treating you now? God, it made it even harder for you to feel subtle about it.
And, maybe.. Just maybe.. it was because he was the best fuck you’ve ever had.
But, despite how sensitive you were, you couldn’t help but want more. And besides, you wanted him to feel good too, after bringing you so much satisfaction.
“Thank you, Derek.. B-But, what about you?” You asked shakily, body still trembling from your peak. He shook his head, caressing your face gently as he spoke, “Nah, baby, this was all about you.. It’s always been.. about you. To make you feel good.”
You let out a small laugh and shook your head yourself, in denial of it all. Did he really care for you this much?
Before you can ask him anything, he continues, spilling out every ounce of vulnerability he could allow himself to. “Took my chance after waiting all these months. I couldn’t just let myself be so.. selfish.. Not this one time.. Yeah?” He cocked his head, trying to see if you understood or not. He seemed almost jittery; nervous and anxious to even be telling you this.
You knew he was taking such a big leap to be telling you these things.. To be acting this way. 
It didn’t go unnoticed by you at all.
You took the chance to joke with him, trying to ease the tension in the room. “Derek Danforth.. Not.. being selfish? Never thought I’d see the day.” You giggled, hoping he’d take it how you intended it to.
His head lowers to look down at your hands on him for a second, licking his lips as he takes his time to think about what to say to you. He takes a deep breath, looking back up at you as he sighs out.
“I’m trying..” He pauses, inhaling sharply, “Not.. to be.”
Your smile fades from your face, lips parting as you take in his words. It hits you, making you realize just how much he’s trying.
“At least.. Not with you, baby,” He purses his lips, swallowing, “Don’t wanna be selfish with you.. Not.. not anymore.”
You give him a small, gentle smile, nodding slowly in hopes to encourage him. You want him to open up to you; it’s all you’ve ever wanted from him.
“Derek, I..” You start, but he cuts you off.
“I know I.. I’ve been an asshole, to everyone, to you.. But, I don’t wanna be the guy.. That doesn’t deserve you anymore,” He admits quickly, almost wanting to rush it out before he bails out on it.
“I-I.. want to be the guy that does.”
He finally confesses it.. the one thing that’s been holding him down; the one thing that he’s finally managed to realize.
It wasn’t just you that captivated him.
It was the drive to change for you that did.
You let out a relieving breath, shutting your eyes as you press a passionate, genuine kiss on his lips. He takes it gratefully, sighing into your mouth as if the weight of the entire world was lifted off his shoulders.
You pull away from him, grinning as your glazed eyes glimmer at him.
“That’s a start, baby.. You’re already a mile ahead of that.” You tell him, honest and real; vulnerable yourself.
Maybe, Derek Danforth was more than capable of change.
Maybe.. Derek Danforth wasn’t so selfish after all.
Now, it was your chance to find out.
-
a/n: thank you so much for reading! i loved writing this and i might add onto it when writing for derek again to stay in this little world! :)
feedback & reblogs are always greatly appreciated <3
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writing-house-of-m · 10 months
Text
When the party is over
Wanda Maximoff x Reader
Genre: Fluff, Smut
Warnings: R's gender is not specified. Sexual content (minors DNI) - Oral (face sitting), vaginal penetration, hints of fingering (W receiving).
Word count: 6168
Summary: You have had one thing on your mind all day. It is time to make it a reality when you and Wanda are finally alone
A/N: I've had this for such a long time, before I even posted my first fic. It was because I saw a gif and since then it has been a struggle to finish. I don't like how this has turned out but it's smut so I think all your thirsty asses will like it. Enjoy! And let me know what you think 😊
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MINORS DNI
You have been out shopping for what feels like most of the afternoon to get what you need for tonight's party. While your wife is busy getting what is on the list, you can't stop ogling her. 
To you she is the most beautiful person to have ever walked this earth and with the outfit she is wearing you can only be surprised you have made it this far into the day without your hands being all over her. 
The thoughts on your mind can only be described as downright filthy. You have been counting down the minutes to get back home as soon as you left the house an hour and a half ago. 
It isn't your fault, the blue dress she has chosen to wear for a simple grocery trip had your mind reeling. You want to pull the knot tied at the front loose, so you can explore her body. 
At one point Wanda asked you to decide between two types of cheeses. You were too distracted by the sunglasses she had one end in her mouth while she was contemplating in her mind, not realising she had diverted her attention to you. 
You haven't been so envious of an inanimate object before. 
When you finally looked at Wanda she had the sweetest smile on her face. One that you wish you could have kissed away. 
Another thing Wanda was doing which was driving you crazy was, every so often, threading her fingers through her hair to keep it out of her face. It doesn't help that it keeps falling forward whenever she leans closer to a shelf or when reaching for something. On this abnormally warm spring day it wasn't helping you keep your cool. 
Eventually, she used her sunglasses to push all her hair back by placing them on her head like an impromptu headband. The heat of the day was the least of your problems when that action alone was setting you on fire. You made sure to take your time, strolling slowly, through the refrigerator and freezer sections. 
After what felt like the most torturous afternoon you finally make your way back home. 
Once you get all the shopping bags into the house, there is nothing stopping you now. "Do you know how hard it's been keeping my hands off you today?" 
She turns from the shopping bag she is emptying to see you approach with the last bag. She bites her lip while making a fake thinking face. "Oh really? I couldn't tell," Wanda replies sarcastically. Of course she knew, sometimes you think she can read your mind. 
You put the bag you're holding to the side to put your hands on Wanda's waist as she wraps her arms around your neck. You immediately bury your face in her neck to start what has been on your mind all day. 
Wanda smiles as she turns her head to the side, giving you more access while your lips begin their assault slowly moving down. "I thought you were holding onto the shopping cart like your life depended on it because you thought someone was going to steal it from you," the words come out innocently but the smirk you can't see tells a different story. "That or you are really excited for the fruit platter you need to arrange." 
You move away from Wanda's collarbone chuckling then bring your lips to hers in a long awaited kiss. Her soft lips moulding yours with familiarity but just as exciting as the first time you ever kissed her. As it gets deeper, you feel the arousal growing inside of you. 
With Wanda pinned against the counter you push everything on top to the side. Lifting her up from her thighs, you stand between her legs while kissing across her jaw, "Do we have enough time?" You mumble against her, moving your lips down the column of her neck. 
"Yeah, we should," Wanda replies, breathlessly. You finally untie the bow on her dress, the one that has been laughing at you all day, to grant you more access to her chest. You leave a few marks just under her breasts where she will easily be able to hide them later for tonight's gathering. 
Before you can get any further the doorbell rings, making you let out a frustrated groan. Especially when Wanda tries to pull you away wanting to go and see who it is. "No, ignore it, they'll leave," you say, impatiently. 
Wanda tries again with no effort to stop you, "They could be here early for the party, baby." 
You reply, moving back to her mouth. "I guess they'll have to wait," kissing her lips immediately after to stop any kind of rebuttal. When you think Wanda is lost in pleasure again, you move your kisses along her jawline then make your way to the sensitive spot below her ear. "You said we had time and obviously they are way too early," the vibrations of your voice tickling her in the right way because she sighs. 
The doorbell rings again and when you move in to kiss her lips again to stop her from saying anything, Wanda places a finger on your mouth to stop you with a stern look on her face. "Y/n." 
You sigh, dropping your head in defeat but only after you kiss the flat side of the finger still on your lips. You help her off the counter by gripping her waist as she slides down. 
Wanda laughs at your reaction while fixing herself to look more presentable as you lean against the space that was just occupied by her, watching her. How is it possible for someone to look as good as her? 
Before she can leave you grab her hand and pull her back in for a kiss. You take your time, slowly sliding your tongue against hers making Wanda wrap her arms around you before the doorbell rings once again interrupting you. "Y/n, I need to get it," Wanda mumbles against your lips. 
Your voice is low when you speak back into her lips, "They can wait," you finish with three pecks, and pull back with your eyes closed, a tight lipped grin on your face. 
Wanda scoffs at your antics, "Dork," she whispers, her breath fanning over your face. You open your eyes and smile at each other for a moment. That is until the doorbell rings again - you are really beginning to hate the sound. 
As Wanda walks away to see who it is you slap her butt making her giggle. 
You busy yourself by putting away some of the groceries. Out of anyone who is coming tonight you hope it is Natasha and Bucky who are here early. Even if they did ruin your moment with your wife. 
You can hear Wanda talking to whoever has turned up at the door from where you are in the kitchen but it isn't until they get closer that you start to make out the voices. You grimace when you hear Jarvis. Or is it Vision now? Either way he's the same idiot. 
The disgust on your face is enough to let anyone know how much you hate the guy. He has had a crush on Wanda for so long, and even though she is now married to you, he still tries to make a move on Wanda whenever he can. This time he has even brought along his current girlfriend. You don't know much about her except her name, well her social name - Mantis, which is a little weird but she seems nice enough from your few interactions. 
You already know that even with Mantis being here it won't stop him from trying to get some time with Wanda. You feel sorry for the poor girl for being with such a repulsive guy, not understanding how he is able to get anyone with his outdated and cringey pickup lines. Unfortunately for you, you have had to see it first hand in the past. 
The closer they get the more you can understand what they are saying. You hear the woman say they wanted to help with setting up for the party - you'd be grateful for the help if only it wasn't the guy you hated. This on top of them ruining your steamy session with your wife is enough to fuel you into hating them. You know the only reason he is here early is to get more time to try and flirt with Wanda. 
They greet you in the kitchen but you are in no mood to talk to them for disturbing you so you say a quick hello and carry on with your previous task seeming busy and not rude. 
Wanda walks to you placing her hand on your shoulder making you automatically turn your head in her direction. "Y/n, they're here to help so give them something to do while I shower and get ready." Being jealous of inanimate objects seems to be a recurring theme today because now you can't help but feel envious of the shower. 
You nod your head acknowledging her words so she gives you a lingering peck on the cheek. Before Wanda leaves, she whispers in your ear only low enough only for you to hear, "Be nice and we can finish what we started, later." Her voice is husky and has an immediate effect on you as you feel heat rise to your cheeks. With the additional people in the room you hold yourself back from doing anything though. You nod again but this time with a smirk on your face. 
As Wanda walks out she speaks to the couple, saying you will tell them what needs to be done. When the last thing is out of the bag you are emptying you turn to the intruders. "I guess you can start with sorting through these snacks," you say as you move out of the way to get some bowls and cups that will be used for the party. 
Having managed to get the house 'party' ready with most of the setting up done in the backyard to keep the mess out there - different tables have been arranged for snacks, games and drinks. You deem the set up a success. 
More so, you feel proud of yourself for not being too sarcastic around Jarvis. Although, you did make him do a few things that were unnecessary. Like, taking out the trash, moving around tables and chairs where they wouldn’t ruin the ‘feng shui'. Just little things to make him work up a bit of sweat. 
You leave the two early birds with the last of the finishing touches, setting up the drinks table, to go get ready yourself. As you walk to the bedroom the door is slightly ajar so you push it open, quietly. 
Wanda is sitting in front of her vanity mirror in her bathrobe distracted by her phone, probably checking in on social media about her party when she should be busy with her makeup. The longer you watch her the more it seems that she hasn't heard you. 
Leaning on the door frame, you take in her fresh face reflected in the mirror in front of her. "You really don't need all of that you know?" She looks up at your relaxed figure through the mirror when you start speaking and you gesture to the make up in front of her as puts down her phone. 
"So you always say," Wanda replies smiling shyly as you push away from the frame to walk over to her. 
"You really don't. You're naturally beautiful, my love. It's unfair to everyone else." You move her hair to one side and kiss her neck, mumbling, "I don't know how I'm expected to not just take you right here. Right now," you finish with a kiss on her shoulder. 
She turns her head to look at you, completely stopping your actions. Wanda holds your face inches from hers with one of her hands to reassure you, "Later Y/n. I promise." She lightly rubs your cheek with her thumb and kisses the tip of your nose. "I need to network tonight, I wan-" 
"I know, I know," you interrupt while standing up straight. She has told you once before and that's enough for you to remember, "this is an opportunity for you to grow your following and make new connections." You recite like she has told you a million times before. 
Wanda turns back to face the mirror while you stay behind her rubbing her shoulders making eye contact for a second before she continues putting on her makeup. 
"Don't worry, I'll behave. I know what this means to you," Wanda smiles sweetly at your understanding. However, she doesn't know that you are not done yet, "But if Jarv-" Wanda raises an eyebrow at you for using the wrong name so you correct yourself, "Vision, or whatever he's calling himself these days, comes anywhere near you I may have to get physical." You finish, crossing your arms over your chest. 
She stops her actions and gives you a 'you're being ridiculous' look. "He's harmless, honey." 
You roll your eyes at her comment. "More like useless," you say under your breath. She gives you another look making you drop your arms to your sides to continue. "Harmless, useless, that's besides the point. I don't care for him at all. And I don't like the way he looks at you." This time you give her a 'it is obvious how he feels about you' look. 
"Y/n," Wanda warns firmly, "he is here with his girlfriend. How many times do I have to tell you you don't need to worry about him? Besides, he's too scared of you to do anything anyway. You always look at him like you're about to kill him." 
"Good, that's how it should be," you say and place a kiss on the top of her head. Shaking your head you continue, "And don't worry, I'm not gonna hurt him..." a mischievous smile takes over your face, "at least not tonight, anyway," you finish then turn to rush out. 
"Y/n!" You both laugh and it's her turn to slap your butt as you walk to the bathroom to take your turn to shower and get ready. 
By the time you are dressed and join the party a small number of guests have already arrived. You greet those you pass while looking for Wanda. The few people you speak to say she is outside. 
A few of those people are your mutual friends. You want to catch up with Bucky and Natasha quickly so that you can find Wanda afterwards but then Steve, Peggy, Sam, Sharon, Pietro and Monica join in too. 
After what feels like too long you finally manage to get in the fact you need to find Wanda. You roll your eyes and laugh at the comments they make about the two of you not being able to stay apart for more than a few minutes at a time. 
You find her talking and laughing with some of the more important people she invited tonight who she wants to make connections with. You can't help but stand there and admire her from afar. 
As if Wanda can sense your gaze she makes eye contact with you and smiles brighter when she acknowledges your presence. She waves for you to come over so you nod your head. You gesture if she wants a drink which she responds by nodding her head back to you. 
On your way over you stop by the drinks table and grab her something light so she can stay level headed for her long night of networking. 
Once you reach her, she has that breath-taking smile on her face as she takes the drink you hold out for her. "Thank you," Wanda says, taking a quick sip before she introduces you to the small group she has been talking to. 
You wrap your free arm around her waist as she speaks and leans into your side. "Everyone, this is Y/n." Their eyes are on you in a second as you smile and with a slight nod of your head you greet them with a quick - 'Hi, nice to meet you all.' 
Someone's attention grabs you both when they speak up. "Wanda was just saying how supportive you are of her and how you're 'the light of her life'," you can't help but chuckle shyly along with the group at the term of endearment she's used so many times, it is definitely one of your favourites. 
She has a toothy grin on her face as you glance over to her while she and the group look at you waiting for you to comment. 
You turn your head back to the group. "Well I don't have to do much. Most of the time I just need to stand out of her way and watch her shine from the side. She's the only light around here," Wanda blushes, biting her lip, as you all laugh at your cheesy words. 
"Sounds like you're being modest," someone else speaks up. "She mentioned how you go out of your way to capture the perfect picture for her - lying on the ground if you need to." He gestures with his hand and closes one eye like he's taking a photo. The others hum in agreement. You are not embarrassed, you would do anything for her. 
"Any picture is perfect if she's in it," Wanda's blush deepens as she buries her face into your shoulder slightly. "It's not hard to capture her beauty. I just want to make sure I do it from a good angle." You have seemingly finished until you rush to add, "For aesthetic reasons, of course!" Keeping the crowd happy with your light-heartedness. You then make a thinking face, squinting, "Hmm and also because I'm following her orders." You finish off with a raised eyebrow as another round of laughs emerges from you all. 
Wanda doesn't let the chat end there, glancing at you scrunching her nose a little, then looking back to her new friends, "See, what did I tell you all? Full of corny one liners this one," she says, patting your chest with her empty hand. 
This is how most of the night goes; talking to groups and individuals. Occasionally leaving Wanda's side to deal with matters regarding food, drinks and spillages while she continues making social connections. 
You still have one thing on your mind since you were interrupted in the kitchen earlier and you've been patiently waiting all night. All day when you really think about it. You begin to wonder when this party will end so you can get on with the after party you have been thinking about. 
It doesn't help when you see who Wanda is currently talking to. You trust her completely but you're always weary of other people. In this case, Vision, who makes your blood boil just from seeing his face. 
You are busy with cleaning up a mess someone made when they knocked into one of the tables. Thankfully it won't take long to clean but now you are distracted by how uncomfortably close Vision is standing next to your wife and how he unnecessarily leans in to talk to her. Sure there is music playing and a lot of hubbub around but it's not enough that he needs to get closer so that he is heard. 
The anger in your veins begins to boil as you watch him while you finish your task at hand. You know what this night means to Wanda so you can't lose it. Your anger is strong but not as strong as the love you have for her. 
Although, he seems to be testing those limits when you see him place his hand on her shoulder. You hold yourself together as you finish up, not wanting to act possessive but you can't help yourself. 
You pick up an empty bowl to put to the side with the others that are empty. When you glance back up you see Vision is standing a step closer to Wanda making you clench your jaw and tighten your grip on the object in your hands. You don't realise just how firmly you are holding it until it snaps under the pressure. Your eyes fall to the, now, useless bowl, cursing under your breath effectively stopping your gaze on the two people you feel opposing emotions for. 
Discarding the item, you mumble something about cheap plastic and look back up. It is as if Vision is moving in slow motion. His hand drops from her shoulder down her arm to her back, all the while still leaning in way too close whenever he speaks. 
Chanting to yourself in your head, you try to calm yourself down, "You can't lose it, you can't lose it, you can't lose it..." But then you see red when his hand begins to descend lower and it takes everything in you to not combust. 
You can't stop yourself as you take large strides to rush over to them, the mantra that should be calming you so you don't end this man tonight is just a faint whisper in the back of your mind. 
As you close in you realise you don't know what to say or do. Wanda's eyes widen when sees you and the look in your eye but before she can do anything you push yourself between them effectively breaking his hand away from her as you hold Wanda's waist and kiss her deeply. 
Wanda relaxes into your hold and easily falls into the kiss placing her hands on the back of your neck to pull you closer. Vision takes a step back while looking away awkwardly. Wanda's lips take away your anger but in exchange your libido makes its return. 
When you stop the kiss you open your eyes to see Wanda slowly open hers. Smiling with pursed lips, "Hi," is all you can muster up in a low whisper. 
She smiles, biting her bottom lip and replies with a small, "Hi," giggling shortly after. 
"I'm sorry, I just couldn't hold myself back any longer," you smirk. 
Vision clears his throat to make his presence known. You smile at your wife and peck her lips. While keeping her eye contact you gradually turn, moving your arm to wrap around her waist. 
You look to your nemesis like you forgot he existed, "Oh, hi Vision. Sorry buddy, I didn't see you there. Are you enjoying the party?" 
He is not as amused as you are and gives his short reply through gritted teeth, "Yes, it's been a nice night." As if on cue, the woman he arrived with comes over and says she is tired so wants to leave. You couldn't be happier, the grin on your face is almost like you have won first prize in a contest. Which, in a way, you have. 
After another hour or so you say goodbye to the last of the guests as you walk them to the door. Wanda is latched to your side bubbling with glee because of how well tonight turned out. You listen to the excitement in her voice and can't help the warm feeling you get inside from her contagious happiness. 
Sitting on the couch Wanda puts her legs over your lap while you hold her with one arm and she plays with your other hand in your lap. She is busy going through some of the names of the influencers she was able to meet and connect with tonight deeming the party a success. "Thank you so much honey, you did a lot today," Wanda acknowledges. 
"Don't worry baby, you're dealing with the rest of the cleaning," you remark, looking at the remaining mess. "Everyone's gone now so I don't need to put up the 'perfect partner' act anymore," you smirk cheekily. 
Wanda smiles and nudges you slightly with her shoulder while she looks at you. "Seriously Y/n, they all loved you," she pushes your hair back as she speaks further. "It couldn't have gone any better and I'm glad they got to meet you." She finishes by pressing a long kiss to your cheek, the action making your eyes flutter close. 
She leans her forehead against your temple and lets out a breath whispering, "I love you," that you feel on your cheek. You easily return the sentiment then bask in each other's presence in the calmness of the night. 
After about a minute you open your eyes and she pulls away. You rest your head against the plush cushion of the sofa behind you looking in her direction. You see the expression change on Wanda's face as her finger traces a line along your jaw. "You know, we didn't finish what we started earlier." Obviously affected by thinking back to before you were interrupted after your shopping trip. 
"Oh yeah, I forgot about that," you say sarcastically before moving to press your lips to hers. It starts off slow, full of love and appreciation for the other, it doesn't take long for things to get heated especially when Wanda moves to straddle your lap. You rest your hands on her naked thighs where her dress ends as she leans over you, getting some height to deepen the kiss. 
Your hands creep up Wanda's thighs, resting them under her dress where the waistband of her underwear sits. 
When she grinds down on your lap and feels something hard in your pants, she gasps looking at you seductively, "Mmm, someone's ready," she says, cupping your crotch. 
"Well, I only saw one way this party was going to end, darling," you say with a husky voice and grin at her, "you did promise me after all." 
Wanda kisses you hard and slowly begins to move her hips along your thigh.  
You reverse your positions by quickly laying Wanda down, hovering over her as your hand makes its way up her dress to her breasts. Wanda gasps when you squeeze over the nude colored garment and your thigh presses into her centre. 
Her rings feel cool against your warm cheeks as she holds you in place. She moves her hands, the tips of her fingernails pressing into the back of your head and jaw almost painfully as she kisses you with vigor. 
Your body is heating up too much so you try to remove your jacket but when your hand hits the backrest of the couch your mind is made up to move to your bed. 
After forcefully pulling away you finally remove the piece of clothing, immediately going back to kissing Wanda with her arms locking you in. You pull away the slightest amount against Wanda's strength, "There's not enough room," you mumble against her lips. 
Latching her lips back onto yours Wanda tightens her limbs around your neck and waist as you swiftly lift her and expertly walk to the bedroom. 
When your knees hit the edge of the bed you rest Wanda against the plush covers leaning over her. As Wanda continues to move her hips against your thigh you press it into her to increase the pressure that is building up in her lower stomach. 
"Let me make you feel good," you whisper against her lips. Before you can press kisses down her jaw, Wanda unexpectedly pushes your shoulder so that you are laying on your back.
"Oh, I know you will," Wanda replies as she kneels over you. She smiles, biting her lip as she pulls her lace underwear past the edge of her dress. She slowly drags it down her smooth legs causing your breath to hitch. When you see the garment drop to the floor you finally close your mouth, swallowing your anticipation of what's to come. 
Wanda kisses you feverishly as she positions herself comfortably on top of you pulling away not long after. Your disappointment doesn't last long when she begins to crawl up your body. "Fuck," you breath out when Wanda places her knees either side of your face and you see how wet she is. 
You kiss the inside of her thighs as she gets into position while you look at what you are about to devour, your mouth salivating in anticipation. She then lowers herself on to you, your tongue immediately swiping through her folds. 
Wanda moans at the contact and then moans louder from the vibrations you send through her body when you groan at how warm she is, her flavor coating your tongue. 
You explore her folds knowing the right spots to get those intoxicating sounds from her. Wanda grinds herself on your face with one hand in your hair, her fingers threading your hair almost painfully and the other on the headboard to keep her balance. 
When your tongue ventures lower, entering her and your nose bumps against her bundle of nerves, Wanda throws her head back moaning loudly, the pleasure setting her body on fire. 
Her hips move without abandon so you slow her down placing your hands on Wanda's waist to control her speed. You bunch up her dress behind her so you can see the look of pure ecstasy on her face. 
Wanda grips your head with both hands, eyes clenched shut, too overwhelmed by the pleasure. The closer she gets to reaching her peak the stronger her nails dig into your scalp making you grunt effectively sending shocks through her body. 
Any sounds coming from her are muffled with the way her thighs squeeze around your head. Then, all in one go Wanda gushes over you, her hips slowing down as rides out her high, your hands trying to hold her in place to not let any drop go to waste. 
When her fingers and legs loosen, you try to regulate your breathing, leaving small pecks along Wanda's inner thighs as she recovers. 
Wanda looks down at you smiling as you smile back licking your lips. "I feel like I just drowned you," she giggles, stoking your hair. 
"It's going to take a lot more than that," you chuckle back. 
As Wanda goes to lay beside you, you support her by wrapping your arms around her back. When she is comfortable you kiss her, your tongue automatically meeting hers. She moans at her taste as it invades her mouth. 
You move one hand from Wanda's waist to pull down her dress below her chest. You begin to squeeze and fondle her breast, pinching and rubbing a stiff nipple. Alternating between the two. 
Nimble fingers work on your buttons to get you out of your shirt. While Wanda works on your clothes you unzip and pull her dress over her head. 
With Wanda naked your lips work on her chest, leaving marks on her soft flesh. She sighs, her hand automatically going to the back of your head, when you take her nipple into your mouth sucking and grazing your teeth over the hardened bud. 
She pulls you back up to kiss you which you reciprocate as your hips move against each other. Your moans are swallowed as the friction between you increases. 
Wanda whines a little at the loss of contact when you lift yourself but her fingers are quick to help in trying to undo your buckle. When it is loose you drop your pants on the floor then hastily remove the remainder of your clothing. 
You lean on one hand near Wanda's head as your hips meet. Your other hand grabs the shaft between your legs to coat her wetness along it while her fingers dig into your shoulders. 
In anticipation, both of you hold your breath as you line up to enter her. You grunt at the same time as Wanda gasps, when you push into her, her walls pulling you in. Burying your face in her neck to control yourself, you allow her time to adjust to the intrusion. 
Your hips stay still so you take the opportunity to look at Wanda's blissed out face. "You're so beautiful," you breathe out, kissing her lips which she lazily responds. 
As you slowly kiss her, Wanda's hips begin to thrust so you follow in time with her. When you know she can take more, you take control, pulling her legs up, so you can slam into her deeper. Wanda exclaims your name after a particularly hard stroke. 
You rest your forehead against Wanda's as she holds on to you like her life depends on it. Your mind goes to the sting you will feel when you shower in the morning from the scratches Wanda creates your back. 
The closer she gets the more Wanda's walls pulsate around you. Every movement of your hips, every sound escaping her lips you're not sure how much longer you will last so you are relieved when Wanda says she is about to cum. 
With Wanda's release yours follows shortly after. You pump in and out of her slowly to drag out her high. Carefully you rest your body weight on top of her as you catch your breath, Wanda's breathing warming your ear as she rests her head against yours. 
When you have the energy again you lean on your hands, trying to not move your hips just yet because you know Wanda will still be sensitive. 
Before you can make a move Wanda brings your face to hers, capturing your lips lovingly. With the distraction of the kiss you pull out of her slowly making her gasp when she is empty. 
Rolling over beside her your arm goes around Wanda as she lays on your bare chest. "Was that worth the wait?" She mumbles against you. 
You cup Wanda's cheek to get her to look at you. "For you? Always," you reply with a smile on your face. 
While you lay there you converse about the party again and all the ones you will now have to attend to support the new people Wanda has met as they will do with her. 
When the conversation dwindles Wanda anchors your face with her hands, leaning in to kiss you. It is sweet and calm, just as the night is now that the house is empty. 
After a while she pulls you so you move on top of her again and you know where this is going to go. Your hand travels down the side of Wanda’s body until it gets to its warm destination. 
Wanda gasps as your fingers circle her clit slowly and when you go to remove your hand she holds your wrist in place. You smile into the kiss and press harder making Wanda yelp. 
From there you don't stop until she can't take anymore. 
When you wake up in tangled sheets the next morning, one of your arms are draped over Wanda's midsection while you lay on your side, you open your eyes to see Wanda is already working. 
Her face is concentrating on her phone, no doubt checking up on posts and what kind of impression her party left last night. She lets out a slight laugh that turns into a gorgeous smile plastered on her face. 
You finally speak, "I thought I was the only one that could make you smile like that." 
She looks over at you, her smile unwavering, "I guess you're right." She leans over to peck your lips then turns to her side leaning on her elbow and resting her head on her hand passing you her phone. 
You raise an eyebrow as you take it. When you see the post you let out a laugh through your nose just as she did prior, "Yeah, I guess I am." 
You look at her passing her back the phone. You both reposition yourselves - you put one hand behind your head resting on the headboard and she lays on her back, letting her rest her head on your chest giving you both a clear view of her phone. 
Someone captured your kiss from last night and posted it tagging Wanda with the caption: 'I can only hope to find a love like this one day...' 
You laugh, confusing Wanda and making her turn her head to look at you quizzically. You point to Vision on the side in the photo looking over the two of you. "I didn't even notice him." You move your hand back and thread your fingers through your hair. "What a tool," you say, making Wanda shake her head, giggling. 
"You know you didn't have to do that right?" She rolls over and lays on top of you, putting her phone to the side so she can look at you. You lay with your back fully against the bed and place one of your hands on her lower back while the other is busy combing through her messy hair. "You could have just joined in the conversation, he would have moved away." 
"No, there were only two options," you say. 
Wanda looks at you with a crease between her eyebrows wondering where you are going to go with this. What exactly was the other option? 
"I figured this was better than me punching him," you laugh as if you're the funniest person ever. 
She lets out a chuckle from your antics. "You are something else," she says in a low voice then kisses you. 
You have another thought, "Although..." You take your hand away from her hair and put your finger to your chin in a mocking way with your eyebrow raised looking in the air, "that would have definitely gotten you some free publicity." You look back to her, "All publicity is good publicity, right?" She laughs at the expression on your face. 
You break the look when you smile at her reaction. "You're either psychotic or obsessed," she pokes your forehead making you furrow your eyebrows slightly. 
"Can you blame me?" You roll over so that you're on top of Wanda so she takes your face in her hands. "Look at you!" You say excitedly as you both laugh and look at each other lovingly. 
Your voice comes back down to its normal level, "I'd gladly take your labels of psychotic and obsessed if it keeps anyone else from putting their hands on you." 
"The others are right, you really are crazy," Wanda says, pecking your lips. 
"You must know it's because of you, don’t you?" You accuse. 
"Oh no, you can't use me as an excuse for your obsessive craziness," she says while squeezing your cheeks together and pressing another light kiss to your lips. 
"Oh yes I can," you lean in to kiss the smile off her face but fail miserably because you can't stop the smile on yours. 
You can't help it when you're with her. She's the best thing to have ever happened to you and you can only hope she feels the same. 
570 notes · View notes
ivystoryweaver · 4 days
Note
🎉I made this for you b/c you deserve a party!!!! 🎉
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I love Marc Spector catches you trying on lingerie. So... what might have happened w/ Steven or Jake? Another surprise? More lingerie? Less lingerie *wiggles eyebrows at you*???
Steven Catches You Trying on Lingerie
AHHHHH!!! Take all my money so all the Moon boys will give me special messages! I LOVE IT SO MUCH! Look at you linking my fic like a pro
Oooh, ok, so there's a little about Steven + lingerie in Moon Boys' Kinks <- which I sort of used as the basis of thought for what you see below...
nsfw below the cut - sensual and suggestive but no actual smut Steven Grant x gn!reader who likes lingerie (Read Marc's part above, in the ask) Word Count: 754
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You snap a few pictures of your new lingerie in the mirror, satisfied by the way the fabric hugs your curves. With a sigh, you toss your phone on the bed and pout for a second, wishing you didn't have to wait until date night to reveal your surprise.
Then a thought tickles the corner of your mind. Steven actually sends dirty texts all the time, but that's usually what they are - texts. Words.
You imagine him working hard at the museum, leading a tour or sitting in his shared office doing some research and you giggle to yourself as you try to envision his face when he sees you in this brand new sensuous outfit.
Without another moment of debate, you grab your phone and swipe to the most scandalous pose before dropping it into Steven's text thread, adding 'Got a surprise for you' underneath.
Thirty-seven minutes later, you hear the front door deadbolt turn. You haven't even bothered to change out of your lingerie yet - tying a robe around yourself instead.
Determined footsteps clomp toward your bedroom, the thought never crossing your mind that they don't belong to Marc.
Steven's hair is a mess - clearly he's pushed his fingers through it one too many times on the train ride home. His cheeks are flushed, lips parted as he draws heavy breaths, eyes dark and hooded...
and zeroed in on the curves of your body.
"Bit naughty of you to send me that picture while I'm giving a tour to primary school students," he husks, peeling off his jacket and stalking toward you.
"What are you doing home?" you gasp out with mock innocence.
Long fingers find the tie of your robe and he yanks it loose, swiping his tongue over his lips as the very lingerie you teased him with appears.
Shifting from one foot to the other, his smoldering eyes rove hungrily from your collarbone, over each curve, all the way down to the center of you. Ever mesmerized by beauty and softness, he swallows thickly, his own desire stirring to life as he forces himself to wait before devouring you with his mouth and hands.
"Surprise," you whisper, shrugging the robe all the way off your shoulders and striking a simple but effective pose meant to highlight the best features of the lingerie, and your body.
Dropping to his knees, he tosses his hair out of his eyes, peering up at you through endlessly long lashes. Squeezing his hands into fists, he fights every urge pulsing, inviting him to trace the soft, sexy fabric that has you on display like this.
But he knows to wait.
"You're so good to me, Steven," you praise, carding a hand through his curls, inching gently toward him. "Got you something soft to play with."
"Gods, love," he chokes, forehead nuzzling your stomach as he struggles to keep his hands in place by his sides.
"Do you like it?" You murmur, using the grip on his thick hair to turn his face up to yours.
"Yes," he pants, nodding, despite your grip on him. "Oh god, yes. Please, I..."
"You want to touch me, baby?" You purr, stepping a little closer until his cheek rests against your soft abdomen. "Will you make me feel good?"
"So good, darling," he promises, his voice already wrecked as he tries to wait for your lead. "Won't stop until you make me."
You hum out a satisfied moan, nodding once, indicating that he can touch. Stretching out his fingers, he brushes your bare thighs temptingly, heavy breaths falling where his head stills rests against your stomach.
Seeing this beautiful man on his knees for you already has you stirring with raw want.
One agonizing inch at a time, he seems to return the favor, making you wait for the impending bliss that's sure to follow this display of restraint.
"So pretty like this," he whispers, finding the hem fitted over your hip bone. "Wonder how long it might take me to unwrap you like a present."
Now it is you shifting in anticipation, aching for his expert caress to find the center of you.
"Think I'll leave this on you while I make you come for me." His eyes flicker up to yours as he touches right where you want. Breath rushes out of you as he starts to pleasure you. "Would you like that, darling?"
"Yes, Steven, please..."
There it is. Once he turns the tables on you, there's no stopping him. This is gonna be fun.
☾ ⋆*・゚:⋆*・゚☾ ⋆*・゚:⋆*・゚☾ ⋆*・゚:⋆*・゚
Ivy's 1st Ficiversary Celebration
Originally from Moon Knight Asks
Steven Grant-Centric stories
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i love ur fics so much 💗 can I request a fic were ur wearing a revealing outfit and he gets super turned on about and starts to take off ur clothes 🤧
In the Kitchen - Yang Jungwon
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Hello Anons!! I decided to kinda add these three together because they would make a perfect fic omg 🤭 jealous, tipsy fwb Jungwon that gets jealous when other men look at your revealing outfit and makes out with you 😍 so I hope y'all don't mind :))
*Also, disclaimer* : Jungwon is now 20 in Korea, so he is an fully grown man adult. Please stop hating on me and my posts, all I'm doing is writing and fulfilling asks willingly. The 'block tumblr' feature exists and you can just block me or just stop babying Jungwon.
If your're not comfortable reading, don't press the 'keep reading" tab
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Summary : Your tipsy fwb Jungwon gets jealous when you wear a revealing outfit and decides to teach you who you belong to.
Pairing : Fwb!Jungwon X Fem!Reader
Warnings : Mentions of parties and slight drinking, revealing outfit on reader, friends with benefits, Jungwon being slightly drunk and jealous which leads to him being slightly possessive (kinda), makeouts, grinding, marking, love bites, neck kissing, Jungwon touching reader (but no fingering mentioned).
Word Count : 1123 words
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It was already Friday which meant that frat boy's party was today. You were invited of course, your friends dragging you along. You knew Jungwon, your fuck buddy, would be there and you weren't going to hold back tonight, putting on your most revealing outfit, just to tease him.
What you didn't expect though, guys swarming around you, grinding up against you and even groping you too. Their eyes wouldn't leave your barely covered body, a thin piece of clothing covering you up.
You didn't even see him until you went to the kitchen, partly to get away for those pervs and also to get yourself a drink. As you searched for something to drink, you didn't see him in the dim lights, eyeing your figure.
He was resting against one of the counters nonchalantly, waiting for you to notice him. Until you did. He was wearing a black button up shirt along with some dark pants to match. His hair was ruffled, his messy fringe falling over his pretty eyes like always. His eyes had some sort of glint in them. Perhaps they were a little more sharper than usual.
You snapped out of your thoughts when he spoke to you "You should've taken a picture, it would've lasted longer" he says in a tone filled with fake pity, pursing his lips in a thin line. It was his turn to eye you up and down now, having a lot to see since the cloth did nothing to cover you up.
"I like your outfit" he compliments with an annoyed tone "but I should be the only one seeing you in it" he leans closer to you, "isn't that right doll?" Whispering into your ear. You shudder at his sudden closeness, breathing out softly. "Jungwon, we just fuck around that's it" you tried to reply firmly, but your tone wasn't so sure either.
Ever since you and him became friends with benefits, you had placed rules, but the main one was to : never catch feelings for each other. You're just fuck buddies, you're only supposed to fuck around and that's it. "Don't ever think about dating" he had told you, but it was becoming impossible every time you met him, especially with the mixed signs he was sending you way.
He seemed protective of you in some way, like tonight. It's not the first time he had hated the way you flirted with other guys, but he haven't told you anything about it, just to be careful of guys you've just met. Even though what he meant was to not get involved with other guys.
He just wanted you for himself, which was very selfish of him, especially since he was the one to forbid dating at all costs. But today was different. You could see it by just looking into his eyes. Maybe it was the alcohol he had just drank? You didn't know, but he seemed way more confident than before;
His hands immediately found your waist, and as his lips met yours, there was no going back. He pushed you against the counter in a second, his body engulfing you, and his tongue prodding against your lips. You had already got used to this by now, his tongue always found a way to sneak into your mouth, desperately twirling his wet muscle with yours.
As his hands trailed higher to grope your breasts, his knee made it's way between your legs, bucking it up against your core, making you whine out his name. You desperately grinded against his knee, your clit itching for friction, as his hands played with your chest and his mouth massaged against yours.
He pulled his face away from yours and leant down, attaching his lips with your neck. "Jungwon, more" you breathed between kisses as his teeth nip your skin and his tongue runs over the love bite, almost like a sorry.
He sucks your neck until he's marked it, marking you as his. "You're mine Y/n, got it?" he states, his lips returning to your neck. His hands guide your hips harder on his knee, your arousal already wetting you panties.
"Jungwon, please, need more" you whine out of need, making him raise an eyebrow at you. "Such a needy girl, aren't you y/n-ssi?" He shames, twitching his knee for emphasis.
"Who do you belong to huh?" he asks you, stopping his movements and waiting for your answer. "Y-you Jungwon" you reply, wondering what's gotten into him. He did empty a few bottles of soju tonight but this is not the alcohol speaking.
The revealing outfit definitely worked something inside him, arousing him more than he would think. "How about we take this off, huh?" he smiles sweetly at you, showing you his bunny teeth.
"In some dude's kitchen?" You question unbelievably.
"It's fine baby, the door's closed, and besides, if someone walks in, its not like they haven't already seen enough with this little outfit doing little to cover you up" he explains, lingering his fingers on the thin fabric, waiting for your to allow give him the green light.
"Fine" As soon as the word leaves your lips, he's tugging down the clothing covering your lower body, leaving you in just your panties. You're still covered at the top, but that doesn't make you feel less naked.
His hands snake down to your crotch, his fingers rubbing you though the fabric. You moaned in relief when he added a little pressure to your clit, the fabric of your underwear adding to the friction.
His fingers move lower, feeling the wet spot seeping through you underwear. "Fuck, you're really wet for me" he breathes out, a smirk playing on his lips.
His warm hands sneak past the elastic band of your panties, that way he could rub your clit better. "How makes you this wet, huh?" He asks, rubbing quicker and harsher when you don't reply, making you whimper out.
"You! Jungwon, you!" you almost scream out, the pleasure being overwhelming. He smiles gladly and rubs your clit in tighter circles, bringing you to an orgasm in return.
"Ahh, Jungwon, c-cumming" you moan out, your hips twitching as you release around nothing. His finger proudly leave slide out of your underwear, his lips kissing your cheek as you calm down.
He leans down to grab your bottom half of the revealing outfit, dressing you back in it. "From now on, I'm the only one who can see you in slutty fits, yeah?" he confirms, connecting your lips in a chaste kiss.
Just as he's about to pull away, the door swings open, revealing your spent figure and his composed one. He looks at your flushed face "We were just getting out of here"
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Hi thankyou for reading this post! I hope it didn't upset anyone and please keep in mind that Jungwon is now an adult. I have been receiving a lot of Jungwon requests lately, so more Jungwon fics on their way!
Thankyou for all the love and support y'all have been showing me, it is honestly over whelming and I appreciate it since it helps motivating me against haters and create new fics for y'all :))
If you enjoyed this post, you can help support my blog by tipping me here! Anything is highly appreciated!
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ahdraftingco · 1 year
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Oneshot: Trouble
Pairing: Dark!Joel Miller x Innocent!Reader
AO3 Crosspost: https://archiveofourown.org/works/44157645
Summary: Ellie's gone. She ran away a while ago, after she discovered Joel's lie. It was a lie he had to make for his own sake because he couldn't handle losing her but still, he lost her. Now, he walks the wasteland alone, searching for purpose…and that's when he stumbles onto you. A bright, young woman who had gotten through the worst of it without losing her innocence to a world gone mad. If only you knew what was in store for you now that Joel has found a new person to latch onto…
Word Count: 8.2k+
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A/N: As always, please read through ALL the warnings before proceeding: porn with plot, dead dove: do not eat (this story is not for the faint of heart so don't say i didn't warn ya), borderline non-con, dark!joel miller, loss of virginity, dom/sub undertones, age gap, use of the word "daddy"/"baby girl", bondage, forced orgasms, gunplay, praise kink, somnophilia, size difference, genuine fear/peril, death threats, cum play, rough sex, sexual coercion, squirting, breeding kink (unprotected piv, possible pregnancy/pregnancy talk), angst, mentions of violence, degradation, references to death
This fic will contain spoilers to TLOU Part One, so if you haven't played the game, please be aware that I will be referencing canon events. Hope you enjoy the sinister Joel I've made up and yes, I did based the physical description off Pedro Pascal's portrayal of Joel ~ ♡
It's been months since Ellie left Joel. He had gone out to look for supplies, since she had been sick. It wasn't until he got back and saw that she had taken up everything she could carry that he realized it had all been an act to let his guard down.
He had thought they were past what had happened at the hospital, since it's been almost five years, but the truth is…he knew what he had done was unforgivable. She was the cure. She wanted to die for the cause. She knew what she had to do but he was the one who wasn't ready to let her go.
This is the price he will pay for it.
It breaks Joel down more and more every day that passes as he scavenges the east coast, hoping he'll find clues of Ellie's whereabouts somewhere. Though, he taught her well, which meant he was almost certain she'd be hard to find.
If she's smart, which he knows she is, Ellie would've made it to the north before the winter began. That way, there's no chance of Joel ever catching up to her in the snow.
With a heavy sigh, Joel makes his trek up the state highway, weaving through abandoned cars. He'll be in New York soon. There once was a station there, but it quickly grew overcrowded and fell soon after.
Not enough food for people to eat, not enough protection for people to survive.
The infected would be roaming in the city, but Joel knew to avoid the densely populated areas. He didn't want trouble.
And yet, trouble always finds him.
Trouble had a name this time. Your name, though he didn't know it just yet.
Instead, as he watches you from a distance, Joel calls you baby girl in his mind, seeing how much younger you were than him. It was obvious you were older than Ellie though. You were an adult, a young one, but an adult all the same. It makes him wonder how you ended up here all alone.
You're humming to yourself, as if the thought of a threat nearby didn't phase you. It's a song he has heard before. Edge of Seventeen by Stevie Nicks. He can almost hear the guitar riff, but it wasn't anything he could play.
However, at this moment, he wished he could.
Seeing you happily whispering the lyrics to yourself as you take down your laundry fills Joel with a kind of desire that taints his soul. It's dark and twisted, the way he wants to bottle up your joy and keep it all for himself.
How could you be so carefree in a world gone mad? It's as if no one has ever hurt you before.
Maybe…you didn't even know the infected existed.
That's impossible, but it looks like you're completely self-sufficient. You have a lake house and he can see the fishing equipment. You also have a garden with rotating crops that are growing well despite the incoming winter.
Who taught you to live life like this?
Peaceful, alone, without a care.
Joel is almost…disappointed. He'd imagine if anyone else had stumbled upon you, you'd be taken easily. You were like the easiest prey for a hungry predator, since you were clueless to the danger you could be in.
It makes Joel want to protect you…but it also makes him want to own you. There's an insatiable need to show you how much you need him to keep you safe, from people just like him.
So, that's exactly what he's going to do. Joel will make you his. He will weave himself into your life until you can't possibly live without him anymore.
That way, you'd never leave him like Ellie did…
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Today's catch went swimmingly, as it always does. You reeled in enough to have extra to dry into tasty jerky. Winter is approaching and you start to see your breath in the air, knowing that a storm is brewing. You'll have to start chopping some more firewood to store in the basement in case it's an extra cold winter. The temperature has been dropping every passing year, while the summers have gotten hotter.
You're thankful you won't have to think about summer preparations right now. Having to deal with those forest fires took up so much of your time. Winter is destructive as well, but at least it requires you to stay in instead of slave away all day.
Another winter alone, though. You let out a sigh at the thought. How long has it been since everyone you loved passed away?
You're tired of burying people…
Last month, you had to clean up the house a few miles down the lake. You hated having to do it, but your parents taught you well. The moment someone died, you needed to put them out of their misery or they'd fester and become worse creatures than the resurrected undead.
So, you put a bullet in their head and dug a grave for them. Then, you would spend hours rummaging through their house for any supplies before giving it a good thorough cleaning. It was your way of laying them to rest.
You'll miss that man though. Neither of you exchanged names, but you would trade fish for some of his pepper plants. Sometimes, he'd have canned goods for you that he had made himself. You still have some in your basement now. That'll help for the winter.
All these thoughts help you get through deboning your catch. You light up your wood fire stove so you can make a serving of stew and start the dehydrating process. It isn't until everything is in the pot that you register the rustling outside.
Is that the wind or…no, it can't be.
No one ever comes around these parts. It's so hidden by the trees that only an experienced person would think someone lives out here. That's sort of why your parents bought this house. It was secluded in the best kind of way, which aided a lot when everything went to shit. You were born here, raised here and will likely die here.
However, you weren't expecting that day to come so soon. Whoever is out there…they won't hurt you, will they? Your nerves heighten as you walk towards your door, debating if you should grab your gun.
You don't, because the person knocks.
It's a gentle knock, just three light taps. You calm down a little at that. You figure if it was a malicious person, they'd just break down your door. You haven't ever encountered a malicious person before, since you try not to believe everyone is bad. The people you know have all been kind, despite everything.
You hope this person will be the same.
So, you open your door and…
"Hello there." The older man at your doorstep says in his southern accent. "I was just passing through and I noticed you had a fire going. I don't mean to bother, but would it be alright for me to spend the night here, away from the cold?"
You look the man up and down. He doesn't seem like a threat, though he does have a rifle on his back and a pistol tucked at his belt. He's wearing a brown jacket with a flannel underneath along with several other layers that look like they're getting soaked through from the light snow that's starting already. He has a patchy beard with some grays in it along with soft brown hair that matches his eyes.
The man doesn't look intimidating, besides the weapons he's carrying.
So, you do what your parents had always done when people stumbled upon your little house and tell him, "you can stay the night if you agree to bury your weapons somewhere outside. There's a shovel out back. Choose any spot away from my garden, please."
"I will happily take that offer, thank you." His voice is smooth and gentle, so you ease up a little as you watch him leave to go fulfill your request.
The man returns later with just his bag and as a show of faith, he empties it at the doorstep so you can see what he has in it. You notice how few supplies he has, so you sift through your cabinets for some spare canned goods.
"You can have these." You bring them to him. "I've got plenty."
"You're very kind." He gives you a brief smile before taking the cans from you. "Are you always this welcoming to strangers?"
"I wouldn't call you a stranger. You're simply a traveler passing through. Nothing strange about that in our world."
You quickly leave after you say that to give him a change of clothes, since his are soaked and the spare in his bag doesn't look very warm.
"Would you like to use my bath?" You ask, pointing over at the bathroom down the hall. "I haven't heated any water, so it'll be a minute, but you can take a nice, warm bath if you'd like."
"That sounds wonderful." He seems pleased with your offer. "You're a very good girl, treating me with such hospitality."
"We all deserve some normalcy." You leave him with those words so you can go start the fire for the bath water.
It takes around half an hour to boil enough water in intervals, since your stove is quite small and you can only carry so much water at a time. Though, the man, who lets you know that his name is Joel, helps with that, lugging the pot of water back and forth for you until the tub is filled. You tell him to take his time and that dinner will be ready whenever he's done.
When Joel finishes his bath, he meets you in the kitchen and you pour him a bowl of stew, which you invite him to eat by the fire. You've already eaten your portion so you opt to spend time organizing stock since the storm is coming in stronger than you anticipated. You haven't harvested your winter vegetables yet and you should probably do that now before they get buried.
"Something on your mind?" That southern accent sounds close now and you look up to see Joel standing beside you, empty bowl in his hand. "Thanks for the stew, it was delicious."
You smile, taking it from him so you can quickly wipe it clean and set it aside. Then, you answer his question with a light sigh, "I didn't expect the snow to start falling so quickly. I need to go out and salvage what I can from my garden before I'm snowed in."
"Can I help with that?" Joel offers and you shake your head.
"I can't ask you to do that. You just bathed, plus you're my guest."
"I can always bathe again. You shouldn't be out there alone right now. Let me help." His voice has this tinge of leadership in it that makes you want to follow him, so you eventually agree.
"Alright. In exchange, you can have some of the harvest." You make him a deal.
"Can I ask for something else?" Joel catches you by surprise with that. "Would it be okay if I stayed here until the storm ended?"
"Oh…" He's right. If the storm has started already, he'd be stranded out there if you kicked him out tomorrow.
But, is it really smart to spend an entire storm with a man you've just met?
You can't let him trek through the storm though, so you tell him, "if you help me with some repairs around the house, then you can stay as long as you'd like."
"I'd like that." His smile makes your heart skip a beat.
The rest of the evening is spent shoveling snow and pulling out as many vegetables as you and Joel can carry back and forth to the house before the storm gets significantly worse. You're both soaked head to toe and you're freezing once you both get back into the house. The fire isn't going to warm you up, so you'll definitely need a bath. But, you don't want Joel to get sick, so you offer to have him bathe first, but he declines, since you need to too.
"One of us is going to get sick waiting to bathe." You tell him as you start boiling the water for the bath.
"Then why don't we bathe together?"
Your ears must have been deceiving you and you turn to Joel, who is peeling off his soaked outer layer. He doesn't seem phased at all by what he just said but you're flustered.
"H-how would that work?" You're suddenly feeling warm all over, despite your shivering.
"It'll be like sharing a hot tub." He says with a chuckle. "Just keep your underwear on. I can keep my shirt on too, if you're more comfortable that way."
Now you're embarrassed for a whole other reason. Why did you just assume he meant getting into the bath with him naked? There's no way he'd ask that of you and you feel bad that you even thought such a thing.
"That would work. You don't have to keep your shirt on, but I think I will." You're too shy to be that bare in front of him, but keeping your shirt and underwear on is fine. He doesn't say anything else about it as you both start prepping the bath once again.
When it's ready, you realize there's another problem with this scenario. It's not all that big of a bath. How would you both fit?
"You'll just have to sit between my legs." Joel tells you while he strips. "I'll get in first and guide you into a comfortable position."
You let him take the lead, though you turn away when he pulls off his shirt and don't turn back until you hear him get into the bath. Then, you strip as quickly as you can, leaving yourself in just your shirt and underwear. Joel puts his hand out and you take it, letting him help you in. He has you sitting between his legs, with your back against his chest, and…it's oddly nice.
The bath water is very warm and your shirt rises a little since there's air under it, so you try your best to smooth it out, though that doesn't help much.
"Do you want to take it off?" Joel asks you, his warm breath tickling the back of your ear.
"I…" You would but… "I'm not wearing anything underneath."
You aren't the biggest fan of bras. They're only good when you're exercising or doing some heavy lifting and don't want your breasts to get in the way. So, you don't wear them regularly unless you feel the need to.
"I won't look." He rests his chin on your head. "I'll keep my eyes up so you can get comfy."
That would be nice. It's odd how easy things are around Joel because you feel like you can trust him to do as he says, so you opt to pull off your shirt, tossing it aside. It hits the floor, the wet sound echoing through the room. You adjust yourself so that your breasts are submerged beneath the water and when you tilt your head up, Joel has his lifted to the ceiling, not stealing any glances at you.
Though, it wasn't his eyes you should've been worried about. You hadn't noticed where his hands were resting until you felt one of them slide up to cup your breast and the other slips down into your underwear. You're about to say something but then Joel rolls his thumb over your nipple and you can't stop the light moan that leaves your lips at the sudden sensation.
"Does that feel good, baby girl?" He whispers right into your ear with such sultry affection. "Do you want daddy to keep touching you like this?"
Before you can reply, Joel presses a finger against your entrance and forces his way into you, making you gasp. Your toes curl when his finger does, filling you up so much out of nowhere. It's nothing like when you touch yourself and in combination with his other hand teasing your breasts, you can't hold in the soft whimpers from how good it feels.
You need to tell him to stop, but then he thrusts another finger inside of you and you cry out from how much he's stretching you out. You've never been this full before.
"You're so tight." That word lingers in the air and you're getting dizzy from his seductive tone. "Has no one ever touched you before?"
You shake your head, not knowing why you're able to answer him but not able to tell him to stop…
"Are you telling me this is all mine?" He pushes up against a spot inside of you with his fingers that makes your whole body shiver in reaction. "You're sucking me in, baby girl. I'm jealous of my own fingers."
There's so many questions you want to ask him, like why he's doing this to you and why it feels good even though you shouldn't want a random man you just met to touch you, but none of those questions can be asked when every breath you take is stolen by a moan or whimper.
Something's building inside of you, that tension you've only felt on occasion when you've been bored and masturbated. However, this is even more intense than those times, because you're not the one setting the pace.
Joel is aggressive with his touch, fingering you at a pace you wouldn't be able to. Then, every now and then, he spreads them, reminding you of how big his fingers are as they stretch you out.
You're on the cusp of your orgasm and that scares you.
Why are you about to cum from this?
Why aren't you stopping him!
"Don't hold it in." He urges you to let go. "Cum for your daddy."
You're not my—you can't seem to finish your own thoughts because he's forcing your orgasm onto you, his fingers ruthlessly grinding against that spot inside of you that makes you cum hard. You're thankful you're in the bath right now because you swore, you squirted for the first time. You've never came that much before, tears streaming down your eyes from the intensity of it.
The pleasure sears every inch of your skin, making it hotter than before and the steam from the bath isn't helping your mind calm down. You're getting lost in that daze and it's not ending.
Especially not when Joel keeps going and he adds another finger, spreading you wide open. You're gasping for air from how filled you feel and he must not like that because he takes his other hand and shoves his fingers into your mouth. You gag on them, not expecting to have his fingers invade your mouth, but he doesn't care that you feel that way.
Instead, he goes, "be a good girl and enjoy yourself."
You wonder how you're supposed to enjoy yourself when your mouth is as full as your pussy is but soon enough, you understand. Every moan you want to make is forced back down your throat by his fingers and it's hard to breathe like this but that just causes your body to tense up more around his fingers. They're hitting you so deep inside that you're going to cum again all too quickly.
You try to tell him to stop but your words come out all gurgled up from the saliva pooling up in your mouth since his fingers are playing with your tongue. You're practically drooling and you try to swallow, but that means you have to suck on his fingers to do so, which only riles him up more.
"That's good practice, baby girl." He encourages you to keep doing that to prepare yourself for something else. "I can't wait to bury my cock in this pretty little mouth and your tight wet pussy."
You're on the verge of tears again and you don't know if it's out of fear or arousal as you get closer and closer to your next orgasm. You don't want his cock anywhere near you but you realize then that he's been pressing his hard cock up against your back this whole time. If you thought his fingers filled you up, you were certain his cock would break you.
You start to panic, trying to shove his arm away from you so he can stop fingering you but that only angers him. So, Joel retaliates by pulling his fingers out of your mouth and wrapping his hand around your throat, squeezing it hard.
"Don't make me kill you." He threatens and you go completely still. "I don't want to, but if you keep misbehaving, I will."
"Please…" You sob out of pure fear. "Don't hurt me."
"I would never want to hurt you. You're my precious girl, so don't make me do anything I don't want to, okay?" He lightens his hold on your neck then and you inhale as much air as you can, trying to find your composure. "You're going to cum for me again and then I'm going to take you to bed. Understood?"
You don't want to say it but he'll kill you if you don't so you nod and tell him, "I understand."
"Address me correctly when you're talking to me." His fingers press into your neck, as a little warning.
You swallow your nerves then go, "I understand, daddy."
"Good girl. Daddy likes it when you listen." He gives you a soft kiss on the cheek, changing his tone all too easily. "Now, let me spoil my baby girl."
You brace yourself as his fingers curl their way back inside of you, going much more gently this time. Strangely, it's not enough to get you close. His pace is too slow, too soft, and you're trembling from how much you want him to be rougher with you.
"Say what you want." It's like he can read your thoughts. "Tell me and I'll do it for you."
You shouldn't say anything but your body is craving that feeling too much, so you give in and say, "more, please. I want more."
"Do you want me to go faster?" He asks as he does exactly that and you nod profusely. He suddenly slows though, so you know what you have to do.
"Yes, daddy, please go faster." You say what he wants to hear and he ramps up the speed again, giving you what you need. "Please don't stop, I'm so close…"
"I want to see it." Joel growls in your ear before you hear a pop and the plug in the tub is no longer in place. The water suddenly drains out rapidly and you stiffen at the cold air hitting your warm skin. "You better cum a lot for me."
You don't know what he means until he starts to move his fingers side by side inside of you and you squirt uncontrollably, screaming from how forceful he is at drawing your orgasm out of you. You can't think straight because you can't stop cumming, every orgasm gushing out of you against your will.
"Stop!" You shout because it's too much, you're too sensitive now and you're going to pass out. "I keep cumming, I keep–"
"That's good." He slowly corrupts you. "You want to keep cumming. You want to drown in the pleasure only I can give you. Enjoy it, baby girl."
And you do.
You hate how much you end up enjoying it, bathing in such bliss. It consumes you completely…and you faint somewhere along the way. You've never felt so good before. Your body can't handle it and you pass out from the high…
❅❅❅❅❅
Joel dries your hair for you while you're unconscious. He likes how peaceful you look, having fallen asleep to the orgasms he gave you. He wants you to look like this everyday and he'll make sure it happens.
A sweet girl like you deserves to be treated well.
Maybe that's why he can't resist touching you in your sleep. Joel watches as your chest begins to rise and fall more and more with every gentle stroke of his fingers. You're getting so wet for him now. He wonders what you're dreaming of and if he's in it.
He'd like to be. He wants you to only think of him. He's the only one that you need. He's the only one that matters. No one else will take you from him.
Joel refuses to make the same mistake twice. He loved Ellie like a daughter, raising her to be a strong woman. A woman strong enough to leave him in the dust because of a lie he made.
So, he has to be more careful with you. You're malleable, he's certain of that. You'll need some persuading, but you'll listen to him. First, out of fear, but eventually, out of love.
All he needs to do is tie you to him the only way he knows will work…by making you fall for him.
❅❅❅❅❅
It isn't until you wake that you realize your body is still heated from all the orgasms. You're aching from the waist down and you wonder why…until you see Joel between your legs, his tongue dragging up and down your pussy like he's starved for your taste.
How long has he been…you can't even formulate the sentence because he flicks your clit with his tongue and you squirt just a little from how overstimulated you are. A whimper leaves your lips because of it that draws Joel's attention to you and he smiles, happy to see you awake.
"How did you sleep?" His voice is so eerily calm…
You're unsure of how to answer that, so you ask back, "did you sleep?"
He nods. "I slept great, holding you in my arms."
"How long have I been asleep?" You're confused…
"A little over two days."
Your eyes widen at his words. Have you really been passed out for that long?
"Why are you down there?" If you've been asleep, why is he touching you?
"I needed to make sure whenever you were awake that you'd be nice and ready for me." He teases your entrance with three of his fingers before slipping each one inside of you slowly.
You brace yourself, expecting for the sudden stretch to hurt but…it doesn't. His fingers feel thick inside of you, but it's not anything you can't handle.
What did he do to you while you were asleep…
"You're almost ready for me, baby girl." His thumb presses lightly on your clit when he says that, sending shivers through you. "I've opened you up as best I could."
"Please, Joel…" You plead to him. "I don't want this."
"Your body says otherwise." He tells you as he curls his fingers and you nearly cum just from that. "See, you want this. Why are you running from it?"
"You're not giving me a choice." He's throwing himself at you and you're unable to stop him.
"I did give you a choice." Your breath catches in your throat when you hear the safety of your pistol flick off and Joel presses the barrel against your bare chest, right where your heart is. You only notice then that you're completely naked. "Either I kill you, or you enjoy my touch. I had assumed you'd chosen the latter, but if I'm wrong…"
His finger hovers over the trigger and you shake your head profusely, not wanting to die like this, not when his fingers are still teasing your insides. It's unbearable, the weight of the gun on your chest while his fingertips drag along that spot inside of you that makes your toes curl.
So, you succumb to the scenario you've found yourself in, "you're not wrong. I want this. I'll enjoy myself. I promise."
"Then, cum." He commands, keeping the gun steady on your chest. "Show me you're being honest."
You bite your lip and choke back your own dignity as you grind your hips against his hand, thrusting his fingers inside of you the way you need them to. You gasp when he starts to follow your rhythm, pushing you closer to the edge. It's a great distraction, because you barely notice the way he's trailing the pistol up your chest, but you're well aware of it when it brushes against your lips, forcing you to part them open.
Before you can beg him not to, Joel rests the barrel of the pistol in your mouth, the cold metal coating every one of your taste buds. You gag a little when he drags it against your tongue, but you can't focus on it while his fingers are inside of you. Tears start to stream from your eyes out of sheer terror and the most warped and frightening smile curves on Joel's face the moment he sees you.
That's when he undoes the safety of the pistol yet again and rests his finger on the trigger, his voice more menacing than ever as he goes, "cum for me right now or I'll blow your brains out, baby girl."
Every muscle in your body tightens at the threat and that's all it takes for the tension in your body to explode. You can't tell if you're screaming or moaning as your orgasm ripples through you violently, locking up every sense with nothing but pleasure. You can't feel, you can't see, you can't think.
All you can do is cum because that's what he wants from you.
Relief washes over you when Joel pulls the gun out of your mouth and tucks it away behind his back. His fingers release you from their hold and an empty feeling is tainting your mind. You've been so full for so long that it feels…wrong to be hollow.
How much has he corrupted you? How long is he going to stay until you're exactly what he needs you to be?
His baby girl…
You need to get out of here. You need to run. You need to fight Joel for your life back because you can't be his.
And yet, you can't find it in yourself to shove him away.
Not when he's whispering so softly to you, "good girl, that must've felt great. Let me make you feel even better now."
It isn't until you feel the tip of his cock press against your pussy that you snap back to the reality of it all. You're going to have your first time right now and he's going to fuck you raw.
The last bit of rationality courses through you as you plead, "please, don't do this. I don't have any condoms, I don't want to–"
"It's okay, darlin'." His southern accent sends shivers down your spine. "This is what you were meant for. This is what your body craves. Just let it happen and I'll take care of you."
You claw at his chest the moment he starts to force his way inside of you, his cock stretching you out more than his fingers did. You've never felt this kind of pressure before as he opens you up with every thrust. He doesn't like that you're trying to fight him, so the next time you shove at him, he smacks you right across the face. You gasp at the feeling and he pushes more of himself inside your swollen pussy then, smiling.
"You're so tight and yet you're taking every inch of me." Joel suddenly grabs you by your hair, pulling you forward so you can stare at the way his cock is slowly disappearing inside of you. "Almost there, just a bit more."
"Let me go." You cry out, wanting him to take his hand out of your hair. "Please, it hurts."
"Grab onto the headboard and I will." He makes you a deal and you listen, wrapping your hands around the metal.
His hand leaves your hair, letting your head drop back onto your pillow, and you relax just a bit. It doesn't last though, not when he pulls out a piece of fabric from his pocket and binds your wrists.
"Now, hold on tight, baby girl." His hands rest at your hips now, gripping your flesh. "I wouldn't want you to hurt yourself."
You don't understand what he means until he pulls his cock out of you and rams it back inside, hilting all of a sudden. He's too deep, too big and all too much for you.
You try to say something but he raises his hand at you before you can, instructing, "if you want to speak, you better address me correctly or I will have to teach you a lesson."
You swallow at his threat, your throat going dry. Goosebumps rise on your skin and you're scared to say anything but you want him to be gentle. He'll break you if he keeps being this rough.
So, you stuff your pride away and beg, "please go slowly, daddy."
His smile softens then, liking how you've listened, and he rewards you by rolling his hips, letting you get used to him being inside of you, grinding himself back and forth against every spot that makes your pussy tingle.
It's starting to feel good and that's frightening because you're biting back your whimpers. You can't enjoy this. It's wrong. He's taking you by force and yet your body is desperate enough to meet him halfway, wanting more.
"Does my baby girl enjoy being fucked?" Joel adjusts a bit so that he can thrust upwards into you, hitting that spot that makes you see stars. "Tell me you do."
You keep your mouth shut, not wanting to say a word, and he doesn't like that at all. So, when you're right at the cusp of your orgasm, he pulls out of you, leaving you struggling against your restraints.
"If you want it, say it." He starts to rub his hard cock against your pussy, teasing your sensitive clit with the tip of it. It's torture because it's not enough to get you there.
You need more. You need him inside of you.
Joel takes his time to torment you, dipping into you just a bit before pulling out, dropping his cock over and over again on your pussy, rubbing circles around your clit.
Eventually, you can't handle the denial anymore so you cave and go, "please fuck me. I want to cum."
"Say it again." He wants you to embarrass yourself further and your skin burns from it.
"I want to cum. Please fuck me. I need you, daddy." You add on, hoping that's enough.
It is, because the moment he thrusts inside of you, you cum. You cum all over his cock and he rewards you by fucking you harder, making your orgasm even more intense. You're gasping for air because it doesn't seem to stop. You're throbbing inside and every thrust sends such waves of pleasure through you.
"You're milking my cock so well." He praises you. "Someone's desperate for my cum."
Your eyes widen when you realize he must be close from the way he's pumping into you and you panic, "please cum outside, don't cum in me."
"How am I supposed to cum outside when you're not letting me go?" He tries to pull out but your pussy is gripping onto him too tightly.
"No, don't, please." You can't get pregnant. You can't have a baby with a man you've just met. You can't…but he won't let you decide otherwise.
"You'll feel so much better once you're all filled up." Joel reassures you in the worst way possible. "Soon, you'll beg for it."
There's no way you would. Why would you ever want such a thing?
"Enjoy it." He says sweetly to you, looking at you with such affection. "We won't be able to fuck much when you're pregnant, so it's best to make every time count."
You want to ask why he wants you of all people, a random girl he met in the middle of the woods in the winter, but you're certain he won't have an answer. Perhaps this was all just bad timing and even worse luck.
It doesn't feel like much at first, when he finishes inside of you. It's hot and it spills out of you when he pulls away. Joel takes his time, pushing as much cum as he can back inside of you. You hate the orgasms you have from that simple action.
It isn't until the second time that it feels…primal. You can't explain it, but when he's fucking you like a feral animal, you find yourself leaning into it. Your body isn't in tune with your mind anymore. It's not listening to your pleas because it knows it feels good to be taken by him. He never hurts you unless you do something he doesn't like, which is rare. He only ever wants you to feel pleasure.
Days go by of this, of just…constant breeding. You will sleep, then wake up, fuck, have breakfast, fuck, have lunch, fuck, do house chores then fuck in the shower afterwards, then eat dinner which always ends with you bend over the dining table because you're the meal he's actually hungry for. This cycle repeats until you get your period.
The disappointment on Joel's face stings. It's like you failed him. You couldn't give him what he wanted. You don't like the feeling…but a tiny voice in your head reminds you that you shouldn't want to please him anyways.
During your period, Joel teaches you how to suck his cock, since he can't fuck you. As a reward for learning, he caters to you, helping you with your cramps, rubbing your belly when it aches, cuddling you like you're the love of his life. It's…jarring, to say the least. You'll go from him fucking your face to him caressing your back and whispering sweet words to you.
Run. That tiny voice yells into the abyss that is your mind right now. Run far away from here.
You want to listen but…where would you go? You grew up here. You don't know anywhere else. This is your home and he's the intruder.
An intruder who's making himself at home.
"Does your stomach still hurt?" Joel asks because you've tensed up against him, your thoughts influencing your nerves.
"A little." You lean into his chest, not because you want to, but because he's warm and the winter has been cold. "I'll be okay."
"You'll always be okay, baby girl." He presses a soft kiss on your forehead, taking in a long breath before saying, "I'll keep you safe."
Safe from who? You wonder, because you aren't safe from him…
❅❅❅❅❅
Another month passes and you're late. You counted the days, mainly because Joel made you, and you're late. You've never been late before, which can only mean…
"We won't know for sure, but we can find out." You suggest. "There's a convenience store a few miles up. There's no food there, but there's plenty of pregnancy tests. I remember seeing them."
You chew on the inside of your cheek, hoping he'll take the bait. Please say yes.
You need to get him away from your house. You need to kill him but you can't do it here. You need to do it somewhere he isn't familiar with.
A place where you know a gun is hidden.
"Better to be sure." Joel agrees to the trip. "But you're coming with me."
"Okay." You knew you'd have to. "I'd like to walk with you. It's a nice hike, now that the snow has melted."
The rest of the day is spent preparing for the day trip. When it's finally time to sleep, you're surprised to feel Joel's cock harden behind you as he spoons you. He rubs himself against you and you hate how your body reacts to it, leaning into the feeling.
"Just to be sure." He whispers to you and you know what he means. He doesn't have to say much else.
You feel him nudge you until you're on your hands and knees and he's situated behind you, pulling down your pajama pants. Joel lines his cock up at your entrance and in one single motion, he fills you to the very brim. You can't hold in your moan, not when his body is pressing down onto you, engulfing you completely as he starts to pound into you.
"How does it feel to be mine, my sweet baby girl?" He asks, his hips meeting your ass perfectly.
"So good." You don't lie because you know it'll be the last time you do this with him. "Please don't stop, daddy."
"Never." He says, grabbing you by your hair so that he can kiss the back of your head. "I wouldn't dream of letting you go."
With his hand still in your hair, Joel continues to fuck you from behind, tugging you back to meet him. His lips on yours are sloppy, but you kiss him back, feeling connected with him on all levels. Your body moves against his in perfect harmony and you drown in the moment
It isn't until he whispers the words "I love you" that your heart pinches just a bit, remembering the reality. You're going to kill him tomorrow, this man who loves you in a sick and twisted way.
"Fill me up." You whisper back, giving him something else, since you can't give him your love. "I need you, Joel."
That's enough for him to finish inside of you, the heat spilling into you in waves. His cock pulses inside of you for a few moments before he pulls out and lays back beside you.
You go back to the way you were laying before, and he spoons you to sleep. You wonder what it'll feel like to sleep alone, now that you've slept with someone for this long.
You're going to miss it…maybe even him too…
❅❅❅❅❅
Now that the snow has thawed, the ground is much less muddy. You still had to wear your boots, which aren't uncomfortable but they're harder to run in. You don't think you'll need to run but…you want to stay prepared.
Joel tells you a bit more about himself on the walk to the convenience store. You're unsure if you want to know more about the man you're about to kill, but you can't refuse him, so you listen.
You don't expect him to tell you about Sarah…but now everything makes sense. Perhaps, he's been waiting for a chance to make things right. To raise a child who won't end up dying in his arms and leaving him forever.
You clutch your stomach when he's not looking, scared of your own mind. Scared that the tiny voice in your head is now whispering guilty thoughts…
You can't. It's not reasonable to have a child in a world like this. Especially not with a man like him.
You say that, but Joel has warped you in a different way. You won't lie and say you won't miss him when he's gone. It's hard not to miss someone you've spent the last two months getting to know in more intimate ways than two normal strangers would.
As a war breaks out in your mind, you and Joel get to the convenience store. The front glass is shattered, but it's always been like that. Looters at the very beginning of it all broke it, which is why there's moss going on the shards that were left behind. That's what your parents told you.
You miss them more and more with each passing day. They were well-prepared to have you, knowing they've set up a little oasis in the middle of disaster.
You can't have this child with Joel. You're ill-prepared to be a mother. You're unsure if Joel would even be a good father, even if he claims that's all he wants to be.
Would a good father taint someone else's daughter the way he has tainted you?
You hold back your sigh as you and Joel walk over the glass to get into the store. It's a small store, so it's not difficult to find what you're looking for. You wonder if these will even work, since they probably have an expiration date, but you just have to know.
For your own sake, more than Joel's.
Once you've packed a fair amount of pregnancy tests into your bag, you tell Joel that you've stashed some canned goods behind the counter in the off chance you might get stuck out and about, and you wanted to check if they were still there. It's not a lie, but you stashed a gun there too.
So, you go to the floorboard you hid everything under and pull it open and—
The sound of a gun's safety flicking off freezes you in your tracks. You swallow, hard.
Fuck, did Joel figure it out? You're too frightened to look up, scared that you'll be staring into the barrel of a gun.
But then, a new voice appears and she goes, "step away from her, Joel."
You glance up then and your eyes meet the girl's for a second. She's young, maybe barely eighteen, and yet she wields the gun you had hidden in the floorboards like she's used to handling them. That thought should worry you, but you're more worried about how she knows Joel.
Did he…do something to her too?
"Ellie, please." Joel pleads, his hands up. "Don't take her away from me."
"I know what you did to her." Ellie has her finger on the trigger, ready to shoot him. "I saw what she put in her bag."
"She's pregnant. We're going to be a family." He tries to reason with her. "Come back with us. We have a home. You'll have a little brother or sister soon. Wouldn't that be nice?"
"You're sick, Joel." She gestures for you to come over to her and even though Joel's eyes pierce into yours to stop you, you still make the trek over to her. Once you're securely behind her, she continues her harsh words to Joel, "you don't know what it means to be family. Family wouldn't do this, wouldn't do the things you've done."
"I can change. I can do better. I'm sorry."
You've never seen Joel so weak before. The once scary man that held you captive is now cowering before this girl.
"Sorry won't bring them back." Ellie tells him and you wonder what she means by that. "So, don't come looking for us. I'm taking her and I'm leaving now."
"Please, don't take her." He begs, his voice cracking as he goes, "I love her."
You open your mouth to say something, but Ellie stops you. Maybe she knows what you're about to say, or maybe she just doesn't want you to say it back to him. Not that you would…right?
"This isn't love, Joel." She tells him for you. "Whatever this is…it sure as fuck isn't love. I'm sorry. You did this to yourself."
The moment those words leave her mouth, she shoots Joel. You cover your ears at the sudden sound as it echoes through the quiet.
You hear Joel scream and you realize then that Ellie didn't shoot him in the head. She shot him in the leg, so he couldn't catch up to you two.
"We have to go, now." She grabs your hand and you both start to run.
Run, that voice comes back in your mind, run and don't look back.
❅❅❅❅❅
You and Ellie take a break once you're a good distance away from the convenience store. You give her some of your water, since it looks like she's low on supplies. She asks you about what happened and…you tell her. Not in full detail, but enough.
"That fucker." She seems angry at Joel for more than just what he did to you, but you won't pry about what exactly.
"Who is he to you?" You ask Ellie, wanting to know that instead.
"He's trouble. The kind of trouble I need the strength to take care of before he hurts anyone else…" She says, the anger leaving her voice as a sadness seeps in, "but I'm not strong enough yet. I couldn't kill him…but I will one day."
You can tell she doesn't want to, and you understand why. You might be the only one out there who understands her because you feel the same way.
There's no way Joel isn't looking for you two.
So, your journey with Ellie begins. You're both on the run from Joel, but also finding the will to hunt him too. All while wondering if he's imprinting himself onto you the way he wanted to.
You press your hand on your stomach and chills run through you.
You should've known Joel was trouble the moment he walked through your front door…
A/N: I've always wanted to write a villain!joel since I feel like it actually fits his character a lot, if he was given the right set of circumstances. I also am a big fan of the "I need to kill him before he kills me" trope, but with a twist! The addition of Ellie in this part makes me really happy and gets my mind rolling. The latter half of this one-shot is very plot-heavy, which is new for me but I kind of like it? It really builds up to a possible sequel! So, if you're interested in a sequel, please let me know! This really does have the potential to be a whole series ♡
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0nerd-at-heart0 · 4 months
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The Case Continues
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A/N: Thank you for ALL the love and support on my latest fic!!!! ♥ After not writing for a year it felt weird to write again but y'all have been so sweet, so truly thank you to all of you. I just finished 2 of midterms and there was this guy behind me on one of my tests coughing like crazy so now I am sick. While I should take this opportunity to study for the LSATS now that I am stuck in bed, I just had to continue writing. As long as you all continue reading I am more than happy to continue writing. If you want to be added or taken out of the taglist please DM me :) 
P.S. : I used the stars to break down the sections for myself as I wrote and kept them in, if they are weird or unhelpful let me know so I can get rid of them and as always feedback is always welcomed
Taglist: @happy74827 @princessvader15 @hashcakes @malfoys-demigod @yiiiikesmish
Word Count: 5.5 k
Warnings: sexual harassment, cursing, pet name like sweetheart, mentions of food and eating (any more warnings that I missed please let me know)
There will be a part 3 after this one, still writing it but if you haven’t please check out the Part 1:  The Stress of a Case
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As you finished the last bite of your meal in Rachel’s office, a comfortable silence settled between you and Harvey.  Harvey leaned back in his chair, and a sense of relief seemed to wash over his face, "You did well today, Y/N. We'll get through the Jackson case. I promise. Whatever it takes.”
You offered a small, appreciative smile, acknowledging the sentiment. "Thanks, Harvey. It means a lot."
You stared at the clock and the realization that it was time to head home crept in. Harvey, ever the gentleman, offered you a ride, “Come on, I’ll take you home.” He stood up moving the desk back to how he found it and picked up the trash. 
However, your need for control and familiarity after the recent panic attack made you decline the ride, "Thanks for the offer, Harvey, but I think I'll take my own car tonight."
A small, almost imperceptible frown flashed across Harvey's face, quickly replaced by his usual composed expression. "Alright." was all he could stammer out. 
After parting ways, you walked towards the parking lot, keys in hand. As you drove home alone, a subtle sense of curiosity lingered. What if you had accepted Harvey's offer? What could have unfolded in the confined space of his car, free from the walls of the office? 
The thought nagged at you as you navigated the familiar streets, feeling your head cooling off. Rolling down the window to allow the fresh air to overflow your senses  There was a part of you that wished you knew the answer, a desire to unravel the mysteries that lay hidden beneath the surface of your professional relationship with the Harvey Specter.
The next few days went by pretty fast. All days felt the same . It was a routine of restless nights as your mind was clear yet foggy on your night with Harvey. Nervous yet excited on what the following days would bring. You woke up early every day to go to your favorite coffee spot. But every day you spent it at your desk going through Amir related emails and one day you spent the day researching organic cat food for Louis. You haven't even had the chance to really see or talk to Harvey, not that you were keeping track ( 3 times he has spoken to you). 
But about 10 days after the incident, here you were, standing in the elevator, expecting to be another calm day of going through Amir’s associates emails with Rachel.
But when the elevators dinged,  the beautiful face of  Donna Paulsen appeared as the door opened.  She stood there waiting for you and without saying a word she turned on her heel and gestured for you to follow her. And like a loyal puppy you followed Donna through the corridors, her signature click-clacking heels echoing in the hallways as you tried to keep you.
As you walked, Donna’s voice boomed,  efficiently providing a rundown of the latest developments in the Amir Jackson case. Apparently, Amir had signed a contract with his brother-in-law’s firm, and Harvey was currently breaking it down in his office to find any potential weaknesses or loopholes. You were confused but eager to understand your role in all this, so you did your best to keep up with Donna's brisk pace. The details of the case were important, but the question of why Donna was sharing them with you lingered in the back of your mind.
Donna approached Harvey's office, she shot you a sly smile and motioned for you to enter. The door creaked open, revealing Harvey Specter engrossed in his work. Donna whispered, "You wanted to be in the big leagues; well, here you go."
Harvey was seated at his desk, a stack of papers spread out before him. Mike Ross was leaning against the wall, and both turned their attention to you as you entered.
Donna, standing in the doorway, mouthed, "You got this."
It dawned on you—this wasn't just an update on the case. Donna had orchestrated this moment for a reason. You were being given a seat at the table, an opportunity to contribute to a high-stakes strategy session. The realization sent a surge of adrenaline through your veins. Harvey was keeping his word after all. 
 Harvey and Mike acknowledged your presence, you straightened your posture and mentally prepared to engage in the battle of wits that lay ahead.  You are ready to keep up and prove your worth beyond your typing skills. 
Mike walks up to you handing you a file, and you take a seat. Knowing the breakdown you take out your colorful pack of highlighter ready to color coordinate. Purple for potential loopholes, yellow for things to research, blue for important dates and green for  contacts. 
Harvey couldn't help but notice you being meticulously organized. With a smirk, he quipped, "Really, Y/N? Color-coordinated highlighters? Are we in kindergarten?"
You, shot back with a playful smile, "Well, Harvey, some of us appreciate a little order and aesthetic appeal. It's called professionalism."
Harvey raised an eyebrow, intrigued by the quick retort. "Professionalism, huh? I prefer the classic black and white approach. Simple and effective."
You without looking up from your file said, "Well, Harvey, sometimes a splash of color can make things more interesting. Maybe you should try it sometime.” Reaching down to your highlighter bag you pulled one out handing it to him, “Here, I think pink suits you”
He takes it from your hand, not backing down, “You know if your legal skills were as efficient as your highlighting skills we would be done with these files already”
You retorted, “Well, Harvey, if your people skills were as smooth as your hair, we'd have won the case yesterday."
Mike, who had been silently working, looked up with a bewildered expression, unsure of how the banter had suddenly transformed into a flirtatious exchange. He blinked, processing the unexpected turn of events.
Harvey  leaned against the table and raised an eyebrow. "Smooth hair, huh? You're just jealous, Y/N."
"Oh, please," you replied with a smirk, "I've seen smoother hair on a mannequin."
Mike, now thoroughly confused, looked between Harvey and you, trying to decipher when this banter became a new development. 
Before anything can go any further there is a knock at Harvey’s door, it was Rachel. After hearing from Mike about your little fainting incident, she was kind of overbearingly persistent on making sure you were eating and were okay no matter how much you told her you were fine.  Despite your reassurances that the incident of passing out was a one-time occurrence and that you were doing better, Rachel continued to express her care in thoughtful ways.
Today was no exception. Rachel asked to borrow you for a moment. Excusing yourself from your work, you followed Rachel outside the office. She had a warm smile on her face and a bagel in her hand, with your name on it.
"Hey, I know you said you're doing better, but I thought you might need a little pick-me-up," Rachel said, offering you the bagel.
You couldn't help but smile at Rachel's thoughtful gesture. "Thanks, Rachel. You really don't have to keep doing this, but I appreciate it."
Rachel chuckled, "I know I don't have to, but I want to. Consider it my way of making sure you stay fueled and ready to tackle anything."
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While you were outside having that conversation with Rachel, Mike couldn't help but seize the opportunity for a little teasing. Looking at Harvey with a mischievous glint in his eyes, he remarked, "What was that?"
Harvey, ever the master of composure, shot Mike a sharp look. "Shut up and focus, Mike," he retorted, trying to divert attention back to the files.
Mike, undeterred by Harvey's attempt to change the subject, leaned back with a playful grin. "Oh, you're definitely focused on something," he said, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.
Harvey rolled his eyes, realizing that he might have just opened himself up to a barrage of teasing from Mike. 
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You returned to the office with the bagel in hand, you tucked it away in your bag without giving it much thought. However, Harvey's raised eyebrow didn't go unnoticed. He questioned, "Aren't you going to eat that?"
Unbeknownst to you, the hesitation stemmed from a lingering unease about eating near files, especially in front of Harvey—thanks to the hot Cheeto incident. Harvey, catching on to your reluctance, decided to assertively intervene, "Eat."
You raised an eyebrow, teasing, "Bossy much, Harvey?"
Harvey quickly adds, “Well I am the boss”.
Mike, always quick to jump into the banter, chimed in, "Hey, wait a minute. Rachel didn't get me a bagel."
Harvey, in his usual deadpan manner, responded, "Deal with your relationship drama outside the office”
Mike mumbled to himself though directed at Harvey “you deal with your relationship drama outside the office” as he turned over to the next file. 
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Without hesitation you grabbed another file, opening it  up you saw on one of the clauses of the contract that it said,  “Keep an appropriate reputation”.
You spoke up, “Have we been able to contact his brother in law?”
“Louis is currently on that”, Harvey said nonchalantly.  
“Louis?!?!”, the shock in your voice was not hidden at all as your hand went to cover you mouth,
“See even she is shocked’’, Mike gestured towards you as he closed his file. 
“Mike you are  going to have a deposition with Amir in about an hour and I got to prep you. As much as I'd rather have you do it,” Harvey eyes quickly glance at you before returning to the file in his hand, “I don’t have time to walk you through it, plus Jessica said I have to throw Louis a bone”, Harvey mumbles the last bit. 
You nodded, understanding that you were too green to already start interviewing people without supervision. 
After an hour of underlining and highlighting things they may be able to use against him, Harvey dismissed you and Mike to prepare for meeting Amir. You gave Mike a questioning look as you exited the office.
The door closed and you could have sworn you heard music playing. 
“He has a whole routine when he has a stressful case”, Mike said as he handed Donna a piece of paper to fax. 
“Whoa, you are just going to share Harvey’s secrets like that”, Donna added. 
“She is part of the group now, she deserves, nay she needs to know”, Mike defensively argued
Donna playfully rolled her eyes and all you can do is laugh. 
“Imma go to the conference room and set everything up”, Mike then turned on his heels. 
“Why are you meeting with Amir?”, you couldn't help the question come out of your mouth.
“Jessica and Harvey believe he is trying to get in our heads”, Mike causally stated like this is somehow normal, “anyway see you afterwards”. 
You headed down to the bullpen with a couple of files in hand for you to review. The bullpen was empty, you saw a memo on your desk that Jessica was holding a mock trial for the associates. You believed she was doing this to boost morale. It's been 3 weeks since the Jackson case was first assigned and every day the stress of the case becomes more evident in not only the partners but everyone. 
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All that can be heard was the click-clack of your keyboard as you diligently worked on a memo at your cubicle in. A man walked it, he didn't go unnoticed as he leaned against the wall, a smirk playing on his face.
"Working hard or hardly working, sweetheart?" he said with a smug grin.
Startled by his words, you looked up to fully take in this strange man, his eyes flickering with a hint of amusement. 
"What can I do for you?", you let out an annoyed breath. 
He wasn't unattractive, tall, seemed to be built, his dark hair slicked back and his tan figure was highlighted with a beautifully tailored suit. 
He ignored your attempt to deflect his trashy pickup line  as he leaned in, invading your  personal space. "You know, I am here to see Mike Ross, but I would rather be seeing you. What do you say we grab a drink sometime?"
You noticed a wedding ring on his hand and that added to your discomfort which was palpable, and  you glanced around, searching for a way out of the situation. Amir Jackson was standing right before you in all his dirty lawyer glory. Before you could respond, the familiar sound of a door swinging opening  caught your attention. Harvey Specter stormed into view, his expression colder than the usual glacial demeanor he reserved. 
"Amir, what the hell do you think you're doing?" Harvey's tone was razor-sharp, his eyes narrowing as he assessed the situation.
Amir straightened up, his confident facade faltering in the face of Harvey's iciness. "Just trying to get to know the beautiful talent that sits before me" he replied, attempting to play it off.
Harvey's jaw clenched, and he stepped forward, his presence dominating the small cubicle. "This is not the time or the place for your personal agenda. We're here to work, not to entertain your attempts at charm.", emphasis on the word attempt. 
Amir chuckled nervously, realizing he had crossed a line. "I didn't mean to cause any trouble, Harvey. Just thought we could all use a break."
Harvey's stare could freeze time itself. "Save your charm for the courtroom, Amir. Now get lost before I decide to make this a legal matter."
Amir hastily retreated, leaving the cubicle, heading upstairs to interview Mike. 
As soon as he was out of earshot, Harvey's gaze softened ever so slightly as he turned to you. "Are you okay?"
I nodded, grateful for Harvey's intervention. "Thanks, Harvey. I didn't know how to get rid of him.” You left a pause before continuing, “Though he was cute”, it was your attempt to lightened the mood
But it seemed that you failed as you could have sworn that Harvey’s eyes darkened. 
“Don't tell me he is your type?” Harvey glares, trying to play it off as a playful intrigue. Though behind those words were sharp undertones of jealousy. 
Was your type arrogant lawyers? Oh god, you thought to yourself. 
“I mean if we are being honest”, you were already regretting the words coming of of your mouth, “I wouldn’t mind drinks with him, if you know he wasn't-”
“A dirty slimeball”, Harvey interrupted.
“I was going to say married but hey your  words not mine”, You shrugged as you smiled, tilting your head up to look at him. 
Like a switch any sign of a normal human being verison of Harvey goes back to a cold exterior Harvey ", Get back to work. We have a case to win."
Suddenly, the sound of approaching footsteps shattered the silence. Louis Litt barged into the bullpen, a triumphant expression on his face. "I got it, I got it!" he declared, his voice echoing through the walls.
Harvey shot him a stern look. "What do you mean, Louis?"
Louis beamed, brimming with excitement. "I met with Amir’s brother in law and we have a plan"
"Louis, I don't like that look on your face. Well, actually, I don't like your face, period," Harvey retorted, his patience wearing thin but shot you a mischievous  look as you let out a small laugh. 
Just as Louis was about to unveil his plan, you received a text from Rachel, asking for assistance upstairs. Seizing the opportunity to excuse yourself , you made a quick exit, leaving Harvey to deal with Louis's eager revelation.
As you walked away, you overheard Louis saying, "Can I just tell you my plan?"
You missed Harvey's response that carried a tone of indifference, "Louis, I am a lawyer, not your babysitter. You don't need to run your ideas by me. Just do whatever it takes to win."
"Whatever it takes," Louis echoed, his enthusiasm undeterred as he practically skipped out of the room, eager to set his plan in motion. 
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The next day, as you were on your way to the copy room, Louis Litt beckoned you into his office. The air in the room felt different, an unusual tension hanging in the air. Louis, with a somewhat secretive smile, asked for your help with a deposition. He believed you were the perfect candidate to handle the client interview. He said he will be there to supervise it all. 
Despite the lingering suspicion about Louis's true intentions, you were eager to prove your skills and showcase your capabilities. With determination in your eyes, you took the file full of questions that Louis prepped for you into the conference room, ready to face the challenge. As you were coming round the conference room, Louis excused himself to the bathroom saying he was going to be right back and to start without him.
As you entered the room and set up the camera, you were met with the unexpected sight of Amir Jackson—the person you would be interviewing. Suppressing the internal alarm bells, you maintained a professional demeanor and focused on the task at hand.
"Good morning, Mr. Jackson. My name is Y/N, and I'll be conducting the deposition today. Please make yourself comfortable," you greeted, doing your best to project confidence.
Amir acknowledged you with a nod, “Oh trust me. I remember you.  I can't forget a face like that sweetheart”.
 You couldn't shake the feeling that there was more to this deposition than met the eye. As you pressed record on the camera, a pit forming in your stomach as you felt that you were part of a bigger scheme that Louis had formed. But you continued on. 
The questions came to an end and Louis was nowhere in sight. You think you did a good job but you really hoped you would have some help guiding you. You were reaching over to turn off the camera when Amir made his way around the table, invading your personal space as he placed his hand on your thigh.  You felt disgusting, but you gritted your teeth and tried to remove his hand. His grip just got tighter. 
“Mister Jackson, you are married and I am not interested so please let go”, you remained calm. 
"This isn't the first time I've given in to another woman's temptation," Amir whispered, his hand slowly making its way up higher. . The situation escalated, and you attempted to stand up, desperate to distance yourself from his unwarranted advances.
Just as the discomfort reached its peak, Louis Litt stepped into the room, 
 "We got you now, Amir," Louis declared, a self-satisfied smirk on his face.
Louis revealed  that the entire encounter had been captured on camera, since the little red button was still going and Louis left his dictaphone as well. There was enough proof of the man Amir really was
The revelation startled Amir, who looked like he was ready to erupt in anger at being caught.
But a last Amir stammered trying to get his words together. 
“I think you should make some calls”, Louis said, his smile not faltering. 
Amir, now furious, stormed off, leaving you alone in the aftermath of the orchestrated confrontation. 
Anger boiled within you. You were mad at Amir, you wished you had the strength to have slapped him or yelled at him but you froze, your mind was whirling running 100 mph before you can truly comprehend what was going on. Now that it was over you were a teapot full of steam. Ready to blow. The more you thought about it, the more your frustration became directed at  Louis. 
His dramatic reveal. His smirk. This was the plan all along and you were just his puppet. He knew this was going to happen, he wanted this to happen. 
"Why the hell did you put me in that situation?" you snapped, the intensity of your emotions evident.
Louis, unfazed, responded, "It was Harvey's idea. We had to win the case, and trust me this”, he gestured to you and the empty door, “ sealed the deal”
Your anger shifted, now directed at Harvey Specter, the architect of this manipulative plan. The lines between professional strategy and personal boundaries blurred, they have been blurring. But this, this felt like the lines were being drawn all over again, You took a deep breathe as you were left grappling with the aftermath of an uncomfortable encounter.
You stormed  out of the conference room.You were shaken and in desperate need of someone to confide in. As you walked down the hallway your bubbling emotions made every step a struggle. In your mind, the need to talk this out with Rachel outweighed any confrontation you might have had with Harvey.
Focused on reaching Rachel's office, you were determined to leave the unsettling incident behind. However, Mike Ross, perceptive as ever, intercepted your path, concern shown across his face.
"Hey, are you okay? What happened back there?" Mike inquired, his voice laced with genuine worry.
The overwhelming emotions made it difficult for you to articulate your feelings. When Mike reached out to grab your hand, hoping to offer some comfort, a reflexive flinch escaped you. The subtle gesture spoke volumes about the impact of the encounter.
"Don't ask like you don't know," you managed to utter, your tone heavy with frustration and disappointment.
Mike was left dumbfounded, his attempts to provide support met with an unexpected defensive response. As you stopped in your tracks, you turned to face him, meeting the bewilderment in his eyes.
"I was Louis’s bait but if this was Harvey's idea, lord knows you were right there beside him. Batman and freaking Robin," you added, the accusation hanging in the air.
Mike's expression shifted to curiosity as he raced down the hall to Harvey’s office, needing an explanation. What the hell did you do now Harvey, Mike thought to himself. 
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You sought refuge in Rachel's office. Rachel offered a comforting presence. You recounted the events, finding solace in Rachel's understanding.
"I can't believe he used you like that. I'm so angry on your behalf," Rachel said, her support unwavering.
As Rachel provided a comforting presence for you, on the other side of the office, Mike Ross stormed into Harvey's office, his frustration evident. Ready to give Harvey a piece of his mind for giving Louis the idea to use you as bait, Mike's accusatory words were poised on the tip of his tongue.
But Harvey, surprised by the accusation, defended himself. "What are you talking about, Mike? I didn't allow Louis to do anything."
Before Mike could continue, Harvey's tone softened. "How is she, Mike? Is she okay?"
Mike hesitated, admitting, "She's shaken up, Harvey."
Without sparing another second, Harvey stood up, determination etched on his face. "I need to find her."
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The atmosphere in Rachel's office was heavy as you sat there, still visibly shaken from the encounter with Amir Jackson. You found comfort in spinning your bracelet around your wrist.
Rachel, ever the empathetic friend, suggested a visit to the bakery you both loved, a subtle attempt to bring a touch of sweetness to the somber moment. As she left to fetch the cookies, you stayed seated at her desk chair, staring out of the window. 
Harvey stepped in to check on you. The air seemed to crackle with unspoken tension as you looked up, frustration written  across your face. You turned back to the window refusing to look at him. 
You couldn't hold back the surge of emotions that spilled out. "Fuck you"
You were always so poised, always so put together, Harvey couldnt and wouldnt lie that hearing your curse did something to him. But he scratched that out of his mind, returning to the matter at hand. 
Still taken aback by the force of your words,  he raised his hands defensively. "I had nothing to do with what Louis did. I wouldn't put you in that position."
But you weren't convinced. "Your motto is 'do whatever it takes to win,' right? I was just a pawn in your grand scheme of things. Last week, after the panic attack, I thought we were okay. I thought we were on good terms, but now I don't know what to believe."
Harvey's expression hardened as he tried to find the right words to reassure you. "You weren't a pawn, Y/N. I didn't know about Louis's plan, and I would never intentionally put you in a situation like that."
You scoffed, frustration and hurt evident in your voice. "Your actions speak louder than words, Harvey. I'm tired of being caught in the crossfire of your 'win at all costs' mentality.” 
Harvey, his usual composed demeanor faltering, tried to find the right words to reassure you. The weight of your accusations, was challenging the fragile trust that had started to rebuild between both of you. 
You continued to stare out of the window, refusing to meet Harvey's gaze. He could feel the tension escalating, and he knew he had to address the storm of emotions swirling within you.
"Look at me," Harvey said firmly, his voice cutting through the charged atmosphere.
You clenched your jaw, still refusing to comply. Unfazed, Harvey moved closer and he bent down  a little so he would be eye level with you and with a gentle touch, guided your head to face him. His touch ignited the fuel of your emotions, whether it be rage or something else entirely. There was a fire burning within you. 
"I don't like to repeat myself," Harvey stated, his eyes locking onto yours.
You met his gaze, still angry, a tempest of emotions brewing within you. He could see the fire in your eyes and sensed the need for an outlet. "Yell at me," he urged, guiding you to stand up.
You were now facing Harvey, an arm's length between both of you. You took this oppurtunity, you took a deep breath as you let it all out. 
"You are insufferably arrogant and stubborn. You're like a shark in a corporate sea, ruthless and cold-hearted. You wield your charisma like a weapon, and everyone else is just a pawn in your game. You  bend the rules until they are ALMOST at a breaking point", you go off on a mini rant. 
Harvey, with a measured tone, responded, "I don't disagree. The fact that I haven't interrupted you should tell you I take pride in who I am. But one thing you didn’t say and one thing I would never do is hurt the people I care about. Maybe I would occasionally push Mike in front of a slow-moving car, but that's as far as I'd go." 
You stifle a small laugh, trying not to give Harvey any satisfaction. But you nodded at him showing that you believed him.
His hand rested on your shoulder as his eyes looked at you with concern. "How are you?" he emphasized.
You shrugged, voicing your discomfort. "I feel kinda disgusting right now."
Harvey's jaw tightened as anger flared in his eyes. "I'm gonna kill Louis," he declared, ready to retaliate.
As he turned to leave you grabbed his arm. "Don't hurt him," you pleaded, your voice holding a mix of anger and compassion. Despite the hurt you felt, you couldn't bear the thought of Louis facing physical harm.
Harvey paused, looking down at your hand on his arm. "I can't promise that I won't give him a piece of my mind, but I won't hurt him physically."
You nodded, acknowledging the compromise.
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The celebratory feeling filled the air in Jessica's office as Harvey stormed in, anger etched across his face. Louis and Jessica stood there, clinking glasses in celebration of what they believed was a triumph in the Amir Jackson case.
"Join us, Harvey! Louis found a way for us to win this case. It's finally over" Jessica exclaimed, blissfully unaware of the storm brewing within Harvey.
Harvey's eyes narrowed as he observed Louis making himself small under the intensity of his gaze. Unable to contain his fury any longer, Harvey erupted, "Louis, you pretentious fucker! How dare you do that to her?"
Jessica, puzzled, looked between Harvey and Louis. "Harvey, what happened? Why are you so angry?"
Ignoring Jessica's inquiry, Harvey continued his tirade, directing his fury solely at Louis. "You used Y/N. You put her in a bad situation with Amir. That's a new low, even for you."
Jessica's confusion shifted to anger as she slammed her glass down. "What?"
Louis, feeling the heat of Harvey's wrath, defended himself, "You said to do whatever it takes to win."
" One, you know how I feel about cheating. And two, you know what yeah this is my fault. For half a second there, I thought you would be a lawyer, not try to pimp out my associate," Harvey placing particular emphasis on the word "my."
“Here's the deal," Louis began to explain his plan. "Amir's brother-in-law allowed him to join his firm under one condition: he behaves and doesn't cheat on his sister. Now, Amir signed his contract promising to behave because Amir’s brother in law has a list of evidence that could easily get him disbarred, but his brother-in-law promised not to expose him as long as he kept his promise."
Louis sighed as he continued, "Y/n was the bait, Harvey. She is one of the more attractive associates that Amir couldn't resist. So I  let the pawns fall where they should fall and we got it all on camera. Amir's brother in law is going to the association to get him disbarred as we speak. "
Jessica chimed in, "Louis, why couldn’t you let it so Y/N in on the plan.”
Louis nodded, ‘’ I didn't think it would be a big deal”
The room collectively groaned. 
"The only reason you don't have a broken nose right now is because she asked me not to hurt you...physically," Harvey declared, his rage simmering beneath the surface.
Jessica, ever the professional, butted in, “Harvey the case with Amir is over now, let me handle Louis” giving Louis a dirty glare before opening the door to her office moving Harvey out the door, “Tell everyone to go home for the night”. 
Harvey followed suit, leaving Louis to face the wrath of Jessica. As he closed the door he could hear Jesscia yell, “What were you thinking”
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Harvey's footsteps echoed through the hallway as he made his way to Rachel's office, seeking you out. Upon entering, he found you surrounded by Mike and Rachel, laughing at something as Mike shoved his face with cookies. The look on your face seemed lighter, you appeared more at ease.
Harvey addressed everyone in the room, "Alright, pack it up. Time to go home."
As he spoke, ​​his eyes lingered on you, and he added pointedly, "Especially you. Y/N.  No arguments this time, I am taking you home."
Your colleagues exchanged knowing glances, and Rachel and Mike gathered their things to leave. Harvey's directive made it clear that there was no room for negotiation this time; he was taking you home.
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The plush interior of Harvey's car surrounded you, and you couldn't help but feel a bit out of place in the luxurious vehicle. Harvey, however, seemed at ease as he turned to you and casually asked, "Put your location in the GPS."
You entered your apartment complex as the destination. The ride continued in relative quiet,
You were now three blocks away from your apartment complex, when Harvey abruptly took a sharp left. Confused, you turned to him with a puzzled expression, questioning his unexpected turn.
"Harvey, where the hell are you going?" you asked.
He glanced at you, a twinkle  in his eyes, and replied, "We both deserve to have some fun tonight."
You saw him pulling up to a bar, one that seemed too classy for you. You were too undressed for this. The doubt clouded your mind. 
Your eyebrows furrowed, and you couldn't help but ask, "A bar, Harvey, really?"
He looked over at you, the corner of his lips quirked up. "What do you say?" He was parked but hadn't turned off the engine, giving you an out.
You looked over at him and he had that stupid, handsome smug smirk on his.
Not wanting the "what ifs" to take over, you met his gaze and said, "I'm in."
257 notes · View notes
weirdkpopgirl · 6 months
Text
Friends Who Kiss | Chenle Fic #1
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Title: Friends Who Kiss
Genre: Best friends to lovers, high school/college au
Warnings: mentions of the reader being insecure and having a mental breakdown at some point. a little suggestive, but not really
Word Count: ~ 5.6k
Author's Note: Okay to be very honest, I think that this story is kinda stupid and cliché. But it was an idea that I still wanted to try writing. And this is my first full-length fic for Chenle too, so I'm happy to post something for him. So to those who like cheesy romance stories, I hope you enjoy this. Thank you for reading ^ ^
➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶
Since the start of high school, Zhong Chenle has been a consistent part of your life. He arrived as a transfer student from Shanghai, while you were the reserved kid who often used studying as an excuse to avoid social interaction. So rather than you reaching out to him first, it was he who practically claimed you as his best friend. Your personalities were a striking contrast, but it proved to be the perfect balance. It didn't take long for the two of you to become inseparable.
However, your friendship took a turn in eleventh grade. You guys had gone to your house after school to do homework. Except it was mostly you working on assignments, while Chenle was animatedly ranting about some mobile game Jisung was terrible at playing.
“It’s unbelievable! Every time I check his character gets killed,” Chenle laughed, and you responded with a soft hum of acknowledgment.
The boy glanced up from his phone to find you engrossed in your textbooks. While your attention was focused on writing an essay, you were also trying to keep your mind from drifting to the unsettling conversation you had during lunch that day. Typically, you and Chenle sat together with his friends. But Jisung needed the boy’s help stalking his crush, so you found yourself sitting with some of the girls in your class. 
Sensing the inner conflict brewing in your mind, Chenle rose from the bed and leaned over your shoulder. 
“You've been at this since we got here. How is your brain not fried?” he asked, blunt as usual.
You shot the boy with an unappreciative glare. “It is fried. But our essay is due on Monday, and I still have to help you with yours.”
Chenle sighed, well aware of your enduring determination. Ever since he met you, he couldn’t understand why you stressed so much over assignments, especially when you always completed them before the due date. Then you somehow managed to go out of your way to ensure he was doing the same.
“You’re more than halfway finished, and I’ll get to mine on my own time,” He reassured, “Why don’t you take a break for now?”
Before you could protest, Chenle swiftly pulled you out of your chair and guided you to sit on the bed with him. Worry clouded his gaze. “Something’s troubling you, isn’t it?”
Your teeth sank into your lower lip, hating how Chenle knew you so well. He didn’t have a problem sharing what was on his mind, while you were the exact opposite. Yet, even a single look at you was enough for him to detect something was off.
“The girls at lunch were going on about their dating experiences and stuff,” you began to explain, your tone tinged with irritation at the memory. “They were all so surprised when I said I haven’t had my first kiss yet.”
You pushed yourself to meet Chenle's gaze, half dreading that he might burst into laughter. Instead, his expression held a hint of amusement, and that alone made you regret bringing up the topic.
Before he could respond, you hurriedly attempted to backtrack on your words. “It's stupid, I know—”
“It’s not stupid if it’s making you upset,” Chenle said firmly.
Leaning back in your seat, you let out an exasperated sigh. “I just can’t get their judgmental looks out of my head. All because I don’t have much experience with dating?”
Chenle's expression softened as he confessed, "There's nothing wrong with that, and there’s a lot of people like you. I haven't had my first kiss either."
“Really?!” You stared at him in disbelief. “Didn't you date Ko Mi-so though?”
Chenle scoffed, appearing slightly offended. “Okay, that happened such a long time ago. And we didn't even last a month, so we never kissed.”
Now that you thought about it, he was right about their relationship ending almost as quickly as it began. You recalled the time back in tenth grade when Chenle was quite smug about dating Mi-so, who happened to be the prettiest girl in class. Frankly, you were somewhat relieved when they broke up, given that she didn't particularly like you. Chenle hasn’t dated anyone since.
“Oh, I guess that makes sense,” your voice trailed off. 
The boy stayed silent for a moment before an idea dawned on him. “You know what? Why don’t we have our first kiss now?”
Your cheeks felt like they were competing for a world record in how quickly they heated up at Chenle's proposal. He couldn't possibly be serious.
“Did I hear you right?” you stammered, thoroughly taken aback by the suggestion.
Chenle nodded confidently, “I mean, we're best friends, so it's not that weird. And it's better than kissing someone we don't know as well or not have a connection with.”
You could kind of see his point. Having Chenle as your first kiss did seem much safer than kissing some random guy. Besides, it wasn’t like either of you had any underlying feelings for each other. This would solely be for practice.
“Alright,” you reluctantly agreed, “But you have to promise not to make fun of me if I turn out to be a bad kisser."
Chenle chuckled and nodded. He inched closer to you on the bed, leaving little space between the two of you. Although he saw you every day, having your face this near made a faint blush tinge his cheeks.
He started to lean in more before pausing. "Um, maybe you should close your eyes."
"Oh—right," you mumbled awkwardly, then took a deep breath before allowing your eyelids to shut.
He had to suppress a chuckle, finding you kinda cute in that moment. Before you had a chance to second-guess yourself, Chenle pressed his lips against yours in a tender kiss. Shortly after, he drew back, searching for your reaction.
“So, how was that?” He asked, voice laced with teasing.
You stared at him incredulously for a moment before realizing he was waiting for you to answer. “I suppose it was okay,” you mumbled.
Chenle tilted his head with an amused grin. “Just okay?”
“Yeah, I guess I didn't feel much because we're not really into each other like that,” you admitted with a nonchalant shrug.
Okay, you might have partially lied about not feeling much during the kiss. Truth be told, there was this strange, fluttery sensation in your chest when your best friend's lips grazed yours. But perhaps all first kisses were like that, and you were simply overthinking it.
The boy beside you let out a hearty laugh. “Well at least we got that over with.”
You had to muster all your self-control not to blush when he followed up with, “And you're not a bad kisser, by the way.”
Believing that the experiment was over, the two of you returned to your previous tasks. Nothing changed much after that day in your bedroom, as you and Chenle remained best friends. But little did you realize that this wouldn't be the last kiss you'd be sharing with him. 
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Despite your previous attempts to justify it, the second kiss you shared with Chenle happened partially because of you. As your senior year of high school unfolded, Chenle prepared for his performance at the spring festival. It was you who initially urged him to participate in the talent show. The countless times you had witnessed his piano playing and singing during your private moments together convinced you that he should share his talents with the world. Your compliments not only fueled Chenle’s ego but also prompted him to eagerly jot his name down on the sign-up sheet.
However, what you didn’t expect was to find him backstage, looking as pale as a ghost. He was supposed to go after a group of girls who were dancing to Red Velvet’s “Red Flavor.” With the intention of cheering him on in person, you spotted the dark-haired boy sitting on a chair, anxiously bouncing his legs.
“Last-minute jitters?" you asked softly.
Chenle glanced up at you and crossed his arms in a nonchalant manner. “What, me? I'm fine,” he replied, though his tone lacked conviction.
Just as Chenle knew you like the back of his hand, you were among the few who could read him. While he was partially correct about never being nervous, it didn't take an idiot to perceive that he was in that moment. It was evident he was trying to play it off to uphold his confident image. 
One aspect that troubled you about Chenle was his constant facade of cheerfulness and carefree demeanor. No one could genuinely be happy all the time, and he was the kind of person who concealed his negative feelings when around others.
After deliberating on how to address the situation, you gently rested your hand on his shoulder, bringing yourself to eye level with him.
“Hey, you’re going to be amazing out there,” you reassured him. “I’ve seen how many hours you put into practicing that song. You have nothing to worry about.”
Chenle let out a heavy sigh. “Yeah, you're right.”
The smile he bestowed upon you didn't quite convince you. Biting your lip in hesitation, you glanced around to ensure no one else was nearby. Once you were sure that you were alone, you leaned down and gently planted a kiss on the boy’s forehead. Chenle’s eyes widened in surprise at your actions.
“What was that for?”
Blushing, you took a step back and stammered, “Just for good luck, you know. I—I’ll be right there in the crowd, watching you. So if you feel nervous on stage, just look at me.”
A more reassured smile spread across Chenle’s lips and before he stood up to swiftly peck you on the lips, leaving you more stunned than he was a few seconds ago.
“There, I definitely feel more ready now,” he declared with a teasing glint. And the smug Chenle you were familiar with had returned.
As Chenle’s playfulness lingered in the air, the sound of the audience clapping erupted for the girls, putting an end to your “moment.” With a knowing look, you both parted ways, allowing Chenle to step into the spotlight for his performance.
As he took the stage, you found a spot in the crowd, eyes fixed on him with awe. The rhythm of the applause filled the air, drowning out any lingering thoughts. In that moment, the stage became his world, and you couldn't help but be swept away by the magic of his talent. The earlier exchange faded into the background as you watched Chenle shine, each note and melody weaving a captivating spell that left you in admiration.
Neither of you mentioned the kiss after that day. The interaction remained more platonic than anything, a gesture that was only meant to show your support for him. But Chenle still liked to think he killed the stage because of it.
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Chenle was undeniably responsible for the next time the two of you kissed. However, this particular incident didn't unfold until the first semester of your freshman year in college. The joy of discovering you both had been accepted into the same university was palpable, though Chenle appeared to be more exuberant about the news. In contrast, you felt a sense of relief, grateful that you wouldn't be venturing into the world of college alone.
In one of your classes, a sunbae began to show interest in you. Despite your attempts to politely reject him, it became apparent that he wasn't willing to accept no for an answer. 
One day after class, he cornered you in the hallway, insisting that you go out with him. As you tried to maintain your composure, he grabbed you by the wrist when you tried to walk away. The harsh move triggered internal panic within you.
You could sense the danger in his tone as his head tilted cockily. “Come on, (Y/n), don’t be so difficult. I know you’re just playing hard to get.”
“I—I’m sorry but I just don’t feel the same as you, Sunbae,” you stuttered, trying to be assertive. “Please let go.”
Refusing to relent, the sunbae was on the verge of pulling you in closer when another hand intervened, forcefully ripping you out of his grasp. Your head turned in astonishment to see Chenle casting a disgusted look at the guy in front of you. The flames in Chenle’s eyes made you realize that you had never seen him so livid before.
“She said to let go of her. What part of that do you not understand?” Chenle’s voice cut through the tension.
The sunbae scoffed and crossed his arms in defense, “Yah, who are you to involve yourself in someone else’s matters? Are you her boyfriend or something?”
You watched as the corner of Chenle’s lips turned into a smirk as he snaked an arm around your waist in a protective gesture. 
“That’s right. So who are you to go after another man’s girlfriend?” he retorted confidently. Your eyes widened, almost surprised as the jerk in front of you.
Shaking his head in a mix of disbelief and embarrassment, the sunbae pointed a finger at you. “This is a joke, right? You just asked him to pretend to be your boyfriend to mess with me!”
Before you could respond, Chenle took matters into his own hands. His free hand briskly moved to the back of your neck, drawing you in for a passionate kiss. In a typical situation, your best friend's impulsive actions might have freaked you out immediately. However, the way his fingers delicately pressed against your back reassured you that he was doing this for your sake, Closing your eyes, you kissed back and tried to reciprocate with the same passion Chenle was pouring.
Moments later, Chenle pulled away and turned to the sunbae, wearing a satisfied grin on his face. “Do you believe her now? Not that she has to prove anything to you.”
The older male muttered begrudgingly under his breath, “Whatever, not worth my time.”
With a scowl, he stormed off, leaving behind a palpable sense of relief in the wake of his departure. Once he was gone, you removed yourself from Chenle's hold and shot him a look of confusion.
“You know you didn’t have to do that right?” 
Chenle chuckled, “Well, someone had to put an end to his nonsense. Besides, I've always wanted to play the protective boyfriend card.”
“Protective boyfriend? You almost gave me a heart attack!” You smacked him on the shoulder.
Chenle’s smirk remained, but he adopted a more concerned tone. “But seriously, (Y/n), why didn’t you tell me he was bothering you earlier?”
“I thought I could handle things on my own.” You shrugged weakly, lowering your head in guilt.
Chenle sighed, recognizing your aversion to depending on others for your problems. Throughout the time he’d known you, he'd witnessed your willingness to go to great lengths to help those you cared about. However, when it came to your own struggles, you seemed to prefer suffering in silence.
“We’re best friends for a reason,” he reminded you, “Looking after each other is 50/50, you know?”
You offered him a small smile, “I guess you’re right. Thanks for saving me today.”
“Well, you can thank me by buying food tonight,” Chenle said, the playful glint returning to his eyes. “It’s your turn anyway.”
Rolling your eyes, you let him lead you out of the building. But Chenle’s words from earlier lingered in the back of your mind. “We’re best friends for a reason.” 
The two of you were the epitome of what best friends were. And that was all the two of you would ever be, right?
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At this point, you were beginning to lose count of the number of times you’ve kissed your best friend. Despite this, your friendship maintained its familiar rhythm throughout the university. But after that hallway encounter, the awkwardness that came with kissing your best friend faded. Although it was more of Chenle seeming unfazed, and you becoming less surprised each time it happened. And indeed, there were a few more instances that caused your lips to meet.
Like the time Chenle excitedly dragged you to his dorm to watch a Golden State Warriors game, and, in the heat of the moment, he gave you a quick kiss before cheering some more. Then there was the other time when you both went out for drinks with friends, a few drunken kisses were shared.
There weren't any real feelings attached to the kisses you and Chenle shared. At least, that was what you repeatedly told yourself. However, as you were halfway through your first year of university, you finally started to question the true nature of your friendship with Zhong Chenle.
Those thoughts began to sink in just before your first finals in college. Isolated in your dorm room, you immersed yourself in studying for a math exam scheduled in three days. Calls and texts from friends went largely ignored as you turned off your phone in an attempt to focus. However, Chenle wasn't about to let that slide. 
One night, he let himself into your dorm, carrying a bag of your favorite takeout—knowing well that you tended to skip meals when stressed. You could see the determination in his face, ready to scold you. But the expression quickly transitioned to one of concern when he caught you on the verge of a breakdown. 
You sat at your desk surrounded by textbooks and notebooks filled with scribbled equations. The sight of your trembling body and slightly tousled hair, a result of pulling on it too hard, tugged at Chenle’s heart. He was well aware of how your anxiety affected you at times. But he had never witnessed it manifest quite like this.
Instantly, the bag was placed on the floor, and he was at your side. “(Y/n), what's wrong?" 
“I—I'm going to fail my calc final,” you swallowed, your fingers curling into fists. Your shoulders slumped, and the weight of despair was evident in the way you hunched over the desk.
He placed a hand on your shoulder, attempting to calm you down. “You still have a few weeks before finals, (Y/n). And you’re not going to fail.”
“Yes, I am!” you cut him off, your voice strained. Tears welled up in your eyes, and your hands clenched even tighter. “I’ve been studying for days, and my dumb brain still doesn't understand anything. Do you know how stupid I feel?”
“Being bad at math doesn’t make you stupid, (Y/n),” Chenle said, trying to inject a bit of lightheartedness into the situation. However, his comment didn’t seem to offer you any comfort.
You shook your head miserably in response. “Stop trying to be nice. I'm going to fail, and then I’ll end up letting down my parents and everyone else.”
Chenle’s heart ached at the defeat in your voice. Setting his jokes aside, he recognized that words weren’t what you needed at the moment. Instead, he enveloped you in a warm embrace. You hesitated only briefly before surrendering to his comforting hold, attempting to fight back tears.
“Just let it out,” he whispered.
Those simple words acted as an emotional release trigger, and Chenle found himself gently rubbing your back as you quietly cried into his shoulder. A sense of mixed emotions flooded him as he held you in that moment. A part of him felt a twinge of relief, grateful that you let him be there for you. You often kept your emotions bottled up, making it a challenge for him to discern how you truly felt at times. 
However, there was a pang of sadness accompanying that satisfaction. He knew you didn't just cry in front of anyone, and realizing that you had reached this breaking point signaled the depth of your struggle.
After a while, Chenle gently pulled back, brushing a loose strand of hair behind your ear. “You need a break, (Y/n). Let’s step away from the desk for a bit.”
"No, I really should—" you began to protest, but Chenle cut you off.
"You really should eat the food I brought you before it gets cold," he insisted, picking up the bag again.
He led you to sit on the carpet of your cramped dorm room, creating a makeshift dining space for the two of you. As you both shared a meal, Chenle continued to provide a comforting presence, occasionally cracking a joke to lighten the atmosphere.
As the night wore on, the exhaustion in your eyes became more prominent. Even so, you knew you should go back to studying. But Chenle seemed to disagree.
“Maybe you should just rest for the night. I promise to help you with math in the morning,” he suggested. However, upon seeing the unconvinced look you gave him, he backtracked on his words. “Okay, I'll have Renjun help you.”
Too tired to argue, you gave in, and that's how you found yourself lying in bed with your best friend. Back in high school, you used to have sleepovers at his house on the weekends. At night, the two of you would be lying on his bed, staring up at the ceiling and talking about anything. However, having him beside you at that moment felt strange. 
You saw a sincere tenderness reflected in those large eyes of his. A part of you wondered if Chenle often gazed at you with such fondness and you simply hadn’t noticed before. Either way, the way he was looking at you made you feel even stranger. And the short silence that had settled between the two of you wasn’t helping.
Uncertain of how much longer you could endure the intensity, you broke eye contact with him and murmured, “Thank you for always being there for me, even when I try to push you away”
Chenle chuckled, adjusting his position to prop himself up on his elbow. “Well, of course, because how could you live without me?”
His ability to joke at a time like this struck you as unfathomable. Instead of the usual eye roll or pushing off the bed, a serious expression remained etched on your face. 
“You're right, I don't think I can live without you,” you said, your voice laced with drowsiness. “Because you’re one of the few people who truly care about me.”
The amusement in his eyes danced away, as he felt the gravity of your words. Something about seeing this vulnerable side of you was so beautiful in his eyes. Before he could fully process his own thoughts, Chenle found himself leaning in to close the space between you with his lips meeting your own.
Uncertain whether it was the leftover stress from your meltdown or the sleep deprivation that prompted you to kiss back without much thought. You could recall all the times you’ve kissed Chenle throughout the years. But this one would always stand out to you.
This kiss lasted a lot longer than your previous ones. But it wasn’t just the way he tilted your chin upward for a better angle, or the feeling of his dark locks of hair slipping between your fingers. Nor was it the soft pressure of his lips moving in sync with yours. It was the indescribable emotions that made time seem to stand still, weaving an unspoken connection that surpassed words and left you yearning for more.
Aside from pulling away, both of you gasping for breath, and noticing how Chenle's lips were redder than you had ever seen them, you vaguely recalled what happened after the kiss. When you woke up the next morning, Chenle was already gone. However, he had left you a text message, mentioning that he went to check if Renjun could help tutor you in math.
But math was no longer the sole stressor in your mind. Your best friend had kissed you last night, and unlike all the other times, this one left you feeling more confused than ever. 
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True to his word, Renjun offered to meet up with you that Sunday afternoon at the campus library. Within an hour of sitting down to unravel the calculus concept that eluded you, Renjun finally helped you grasp the material. Although the looming fear of failing finals had diminished, you still felt a weight on your shoulders.
“You don’t seem as relieved as I thought you’d be,” Renjun remarked lightheartedly. Even he could tell your mind was preoccupied with something else.
You smiled sheepishly, “No, I am! I seriously owe you for helping me out. I just…”
“Is it something to do with Chenle?” he asked, almost like he was a mind reader.
His unexpected question caught you off guard. “How did you know?” you stammered, feeling the heat quickly rise to your cheeks.
A knowing smile played on the boy’s lips as he leaned back in his seat. “Oh come on, (Y/n). You have that look on your face that something happened between the two of you.”
Sometimes you seriously wished Renjun wasn’t so good at reading people. Even though you weren’t as close to him as Chenle was, he’s known you long enough to notice things that others wouldn’t. For instance, when something was troubling you.
Biting your lip, you debated whether to be truthful with Renjun. Although you didn't typically share your problems with others, you recognized that confiding in someone at a time like this was necessary to maintain your sanity.
“Chenle kissed me last night,” you tossed the statement out in the air, hoping you wouldn’t regret it.
Renjun’s eyes widened at this revelation, “He did?!”
“Well you see, we’ve kissed before. But this time it felt different,” you clarified, baffling the boy across from you even more. Internally cringing, you were acutely aware of how bad this sounded.
Before he could question, you continued to elaborate. “Look, it's not as complicated as it sounds. It’s just ever since we agreed to be each other’s first kiss, Chenle and I just keep having these…accidental kisses. Whether it’s out of excitement or to get guys hitting on me to go away.”
Renjun listened quietly as you recounted all the other times you’ve kissed Chenle. When you circled back to the previous night, you felt more conflicted than ever.
“But the kiss last night left me feeling so confused,” you confessed, running a hand through your hair. “Initially, I thought he was just doing it out of comfort, but now I’m not so sure.”
“Well, have you considered the possibility that he has feelings for you?” Renjun inquired, crossing his arms. His suggestion sounded so simple, yet it felt like navigating uncharted territory in your mind.
You shook your head in denial. “N—No, I mean we’ve been best friends for five years. He can’t possibly see me that way.”
“Like that’s ever stopped friends from falling for each other,” Renjun cocked his head. “It doesn’t take a genius to know that he likes you, (Y/n).”
His point made you mentally curse. If you looked at your history with Chenle from an objective point of view, the two of you certainly didn’t act like normal best friends.
“And, it’s pretty obvious that you like him too,” Renjun added, twirling the pencil between his fingers.
His statement left you feeling exposed, as if you had been caught red-handed committing a crime. Laughing nervously, you shook your head, “Renjun, we’re just friends. I…I don’t see him that way.”
Renjun raised an eyebrow, “Friends who kiss? Did you really not feel anything in those moments?”
Your teeth sank further into your lower lip as Renjun’s question hit you. The reality of your feelings for Chenle lingered in the air, challenging the facade you had built to convince yourself otherwise. It was like trying to hold sand in your fists, slipping away no matter how tightly you clenched. The truth, however inconvenient, seemed to be unraveling before you.
“I…I did feel something,” you slowly admitted, “But I never said anything because I didn’t want our friendship to change. It just seemed easier to pretend those moments were nothing more than accidents.”
Renjun’s eyes softened with understanding. “Well maybe a little change is what you need in your friendship.”
Maybe Renjun was onto something, perhaps change was necessary. In the past, you had always held out on dating, using the excuse that you were waiting for the right person. Despite the fear of potential rejection, what if Chenle was the person you had been waiting for all along?
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Chenle’s living room bathed in the gentle glow of the TV screen, a familiar sight during your Friday movie nights since college began. It was supposed to be a time to unwind, to escape the pressures of school for a little while. However, instead of the usual peaceful and easygoing atmosphere, an unspoken tension hung in the air tonight. Beyond picking a movie and deciding who made the popcorn, you and Chenle barely talked. The weight of the unspoken words made the space feel suffocating, and you couldn't shake the feeling of unease that settled in your chest.
Unable to endure the weighty silence any longer, you turned your head to make a lame comment about the movie. However, before you could speak, Chenle beat you to it.
“Can we talk?” His voice carried a hint of restlessness, an unusual departure from his usual tone.
Trying to maintain a casual demeanor, you lightly nodded. With your acknowledgment, Chenle exhaled deeply and sat up straighter to face you properly.
“I know how crazy this might sound,” he started, running a hand through his hair. “But I’ve been thinking, and I don’t think we can stay friends.”
His words felt like a gun being pointed at your chest, panic surged within you as you tried to process the boy’s words. Of all the ways you predicted this conversation could go, this was not one of them.
“What do you mean?” you asked, your voice even smaller than his.
Noticing the perplexity in your eyes, Chenle continued. “You see, I've been in love with you for—I don’t know how long. But I spent all these years burying my feelings like a fool, because I never thought you’d see me that way. Yet, every time we kiss, it becomes harder for me to ignore my feelings for you.”
Chenle glanced down at his folded hands, vulnerability seeping into those brown orbs of his. “The other night made me realize that I don’t want to just be friends who kiss anymore. I want to be something more to you.”
His words lingered in the air now that they were out in the open. Your heart raced faster than it ever has before, as your cheeks flushed with heat. Chenle’s eyes bore into yours, his expression nervous yet hopeful. 
For a moment, you were left speechless. But you still had the sense to hit him on the shoulder, scolding, “Oh my gosh, you can’t start a conversation like that, Chenle. You scared me!”
The boy chuckled sheepishly, rubbing his shoulder. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to do that. But seriously, (Y/n), I meant what I said.”
A mix of emotions played on your face before you quietly admitted, “Honestly, I’ve wanted to be something more to you since that day we kissed in my bedroom.”
You noticed a smile of relief beginning to form on his lips, but you held up a finger before he could say anything. Now that he had taken the first step, you decided it was time for you to do the same.
“But I kept trying to convince myself that all the times we kissed were accidental or just for comfort,” you confessed, looking directly into his eyes. “And the reason I’ve been pushing away my feelings for you was because I was afraid of losing a friend who means the world to me.”
His hand rested on top of yours, the light touch sending a shiver down your spine. “You don’t have to be afraid because you’ll never lose me, (Y/n).”
The softness and sincerity in his eyes made you want to cry for some inexplicable reason. You once believed that confessing your feelings for Chenle would only lead to frustration and heartbreak. However, as you sat here with him, holding his hand, those worries seemed to vanish.
“So…what do we do now?” you asked, unsure of what was supposed to come next in these situations.
A mischievous glint danced in his eyes as he grinned. “I think this is the part where we kiss. But you know, as boyfriend and girlfriend.”
Just as you were processing his words, he moved closer, his breath warm against your skin, making your heart flutter. His eyes searched yours for permission. 
“Well, what are you waiting for then?” you whispered.
With that, the distance between you closed, and your lips met in a tender kiss. It was a sweet surrender, a culmination of years of friendship and suppressed feelings. Although this wasn’t your first kiss with Chenle, it felt that way in a sense. For you could finally savor the tender feeling of his lips without questioning the intention behind it.
In that moment, all you focused on was the way Chenle had his hand on the small of your back, guiding you closer as he deepened the kiss. Your fingers found their way to rest on the nape of his neck, feeling the warmth of his skin. 
Although the change in this dynamic had just begun, this newfound connection promised countless moments of shared laughter, whispered confessions, and the sweet warmth of shared kisses. You had a feeling that you could easily get used to this beautiful new normal. By the way Chenle smiled during the kiss, you could tell he felt the same way.
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mandos-mind-trick · 1 year
Text
Blessed Silence
Summary: You haven't known silence for eight years after your soulmate link manifests as a telepathic connection.
Pairing: Tech x reader, soulmate AU
Warnings: NSFW, unprotected sex, unrealistic first time sex, Soulmate AU so feelings just kinda happen, reader does have a sort of backstory but everything else is ambiguous, reader also is written as female bodied
A/N: I had most of this written, but I just needed some motivation to finish. Turns out avoiding feelings is a good motivator for writing smut. I kinda like this one. It was supposed to be a short fic, but it wound up sorta long. (This is the cut down version too, it was longer.)
MASTERLIST
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Your brain hasn’t been quiet for almost eight years. 
It was near non-stop, constant chatter about anything and everything. Things from battle strategy to medical knowledge to ship specs, planets, species and languages you’d never even heard of. Your brain was full of it all the time. 
The worst part? It wasn’t even your doing. 
You had questioned for a long time what your soulmate link might be. Most species have them, and they vary depending on each unique link. From marks to timers to telepathy the list goes on and on. You’d know, you frequented that list often. 
Many, many times you had gone through every option on that list, waiting for something to seem right. You had no marks, no timer, no strange dreams, no color blindness. For years you had nothing. You had wondered perhaps if there was something that had been missed, another way soulmates might present themselves that was unknown. 
Or maybe, you didn’t have one at all. 
Until about eight years ago when the thoughts had started. They’re not your own. The voice isn’t yours whispering them. At first you had thought you were going crazy, hearing some voice going at rapid speed in your head. 
Reading back through the list had made you realize what it was. 
You had a telepathic connection with your soulmate, and the nonstop chatter was your soulmate’s mind. 
It really is nonstop. 
The only time it quiets is when he sleeps, and that is sporadic and only in short bursts. 
At first it had been enchanting. You had laid in your bed for hours, listening to his voice think about anything and everything. Quickly, though, it had grown to be almost annoying because he never stopped thinking. Always his brain is going, thinking of things that don’t even make sense to you sometimes. 
That being said, he has been helpful to you a few times. You forget he can also hear your thoughts, since he was almost always drowning you out. A few, sparing times, he had helped you, like when your speeder broke down and you were determined to fix it yourself to avoid overpaying for a mechanic. It wasn’t that hard to figure out, but upon looking at various parts in the shop, you had drawn a blank on what you needed. 
Then, whispering quietly in your mind, your soulmate had told you which parts to get, and had walked you through repairing it. You had thanked him, and then got a barrage of mechanical knowledge and more facts about speeder designs than you had ever wished to know. 
As much as it annoyed you, hearing his voice constantly was reassuring. Your home planet had been entirely untouched by the war, but you had seen news about horrible battles leaving planets permanently scarred and millions homeless. You know he’s involved somehow, given the thousands of battle plans and strategies that flooded your mind constantly. 
It makes you feel a bit better that he has a good reason for not actively looking for you. 
It’s not like you were actively making an effort, but after you had realized he was probably involved in the army, you had squashed that thought quickly. You did want to meet him, if only to slap him for keeping you awake with his constant thoughts, but you weren’t searching him out. 
Fate would allow your paths to cross eventually. Right now was not the time. 
Then the war ended. It’s rather abrupt, with hardly more than a holocast from the Galactic Senate announcing the end of the war and the formation of the new Galactic Empire. You had never cared much about politics, or the war, because your planet wasn’t likely to ever feel the effects of any of it. Largely ignored due to its rather inconvenient placement away from hyperspace lanes and tucked into a far edge of the outer rim, your home was frequented only by those looking to hide. It’s a good spot to do it. 
Despite this, nothing about the end of the war or the new Empire felt right to you, mostly because your soulmate feels that way. There's little you can do about it, and it seems he also agrees. 
The battle strategies begin to shift. Deserter is a constant thought in your soulmate's head. Had they left the army after the war ended? You can't blame them, especially as news begins to reach your planet about the Empire. 
You wonder about your soulmate sometimes, if he's okay. You know he's not exactly safe, given the thoughts you hear. 
Not once has he worried about you. Not once has he even asked. Not once has he tried to communicate. You blame it on his situation. You blame it on his stress levels which have been through the roof. 
You try not to let it hurt. 
So you go on with your life as you had before, desperately trying to keep your farm going. It’s getting harder as time and the planet’s unpredictable weather wears on your tools and your home. You fix what you can, and hope the rest of it makes it to the next harvest. 
You’re in town looking for parts when it finally happens. 
It’s been nearly six standard since the war ended and the Empire took over the galaxy. Your planet still remains untouched and unbothered, hidden away safely in its corner of the galaxy. Visitors are still rare, and usually draw attention when they come. 
You’re haggling for a part when you notice a group of newcomers. Five of them, looking out of place as they talk amongst each other. 
You can't help but overhear the conversation, given your proximity. Your body stiffens as you pick up one of their voices, many thoughts running through your head. You know that voice. You've never heard it in person. Only ever in your mind. 
The emotions leave you like an explosion, your body turning before you can stop it. "You!" You point at the group, cutting him off before he can continue. 
They all turn to look at you, but you're too focused on him. You walk up to him, grabbing him by the chest plate and shaking him.
"Do you ever stop thinking? I haven't known silence in eight years!" You jab a finger into his chest, ignoring the way your finger bends uncomfortably against the unrelenting plastoid. "It never stops. Always something going and going and going. Do you even sleep anymore? And, and you can’t even bother to let me know you’re okay? You...you can’t even ask about me either? I’ve been waiting a long time to even hear from you and all I get is useless facts?” 
He blinks down at you from behind his goggles, mouth parted in shocked silence. 
“Tech,” One of the others says, drawing you back to reality. You’re in a very public place, telling off your soulmate. “You know her?” 
Tech. That’s his name? Or perhaps a nickname. He lifts a hand, adjusting his goggles as he stares down at you. He’s tall, having to tilt his head to look down at you, just as you have to tilt your head to look up at him. 
“Yes, I believe I’ve just met my soulmate.” He says slowly. They all turn to look at you, making you feel a bit self conscious. “We share a telepathic connection. It’s one of the rarer forms of soulmate links, though not the rarest. It’s affected by distance, the further you are, the stronger the connection is.” 
“Maker, he talks as much as he thinks, doesn’t he?” You say, taking a step back. 
“Ha!” The largest of the group exclaims. “That’s going to be really loud for you!” 
“Actually, it will be the opposite.” Tech says. “As the link strengthens with distance, it weakens the closer we are. At this proximity, we won’t be able to hear each other’s thoughts at all.” 
“As interesting as all of this is, we’re supposed to be laying low, remember?” The one that had spoken up earlier says. 
You can’t help but snort, looking up at him. He’s shorter than the others, and has a skull tattooed on half of his face. “No one around here is going to say anything. Well, they’re all horrible gossips because nothing ever happens around here, but don’t worry. They only talk amongst each other. If you’re looking to hide, this is your place. No one cares about this planet. It’s too inconvenient.” 
“She’s right.” Tech says. “It took us two days to reach here from the nearest hyperspace lane. The Republic had no interest in this planet. It’s highly unlikely the Empire will even consider it, since it has a small population and no major exports.” He pulls out a datapad, typing rapidly on it. “According to my research there’s not even a starport on this planet.” 
The one with the skull tattoo stares at you hard, like he’s trying to see through your skin. You can tell he doesn't exactly trust you. But, if Tech’s thoughts were anything to go off of, he doesn't have good reason to trust anyone. 
“This may be our only option for the time being.” Another one says. He’s rather gaunt and pale with a headset on. 
The four of them share looks, seeming to silently communicate for a moment before they turn back to you. “Do you know of anywhere we could lay low for a while?” The skull tattoo asks her. 
You shrug, sizing up the largest of them. “Well, I could use some help on my farm. If you’re not opposed to manual labor, I have plenty of space.” 
They share another long look, silently debating your offer. You’re not sure why you’re offering space to total strangers, aside from possibly some free help for the upcoming harvest. Also, perhaps, because one of them is your soulmate. 
“We’ll take you up on that offer.” Skull tattoo says, turning back to you. 
You nod. “Great. I’m out on the outskirts, though. It’s a bit of a hike.”
“We will fly and meet you there.” Tech says. “I can find it.” 
“Right.” You nod. Of course he could just read your mind and figure out where it is. “I guess I’ll see you there.” 
You head back to your speeder, setting off out of town and out to your property. You glance up as a ship flies overhead, landing at the back of the house as you drive up. You park in your usual spot, watching as they leave the ship. Skull tattoo takes the lead as they approach you. 
“I’m Hunter.” He introduces himself, motioning to the others. “This is Wrecker, Echo, Tech, and Omega.” He motions to the youngest, a girl no older than fifteen, who waves at you with a smile. 
You introduce yourself, waving back. 
“Thank you for doing this.” Hunter says. 
You shrug. “I am serious about needing the extra help.” 
“Whatever you need, we’ll do it.” He says sincerely. 
“We’ll worry about that tomorrow.” You say, glancing at the setting sun. “You can get settled tonight.” 
You lead them inside, wishing you had tidied up a bit. Then again, you hadn’t really expected to have company. The house feels small with the five extra bodies in it. Just like it used to. 
“My room’s down there.” You point down one of the hallways, before turning to the other. “The three spare rooms are down here.” You lead them down the hallway. “There’s spare clothes in the dressers you’re welcome to, if they fit. There’s blankets in the closet and towels in the fresher. There’s also an outhouse by the barn if you’re feeling brave. I’ll let you get settled and go start on dinner.” 
You scurry your way down the hallway, leaving them alone. You can practically hear the rebuking by your grandmother at letting complete strangers into your home so willingly. It’s not like you had anything of value left. 
And they’re technically not strangers. At least, not totally. 
***
You curl up in the chair, looking out at the light bugs dancing over the crops. A figure steps out on the porch, slowly approaching you. You don’t have to look up to know who it is. Despite only being around him for a short time, you feel like you’ve known him forever.
“Can’t sleep?” You ask, turning to look at him as he sits. 
“I have no need to.” He says simply. You blink at him in confusion. “We were designed to need less sleep than the average nat-born.” 
“Right.” You say slowly. 
“We are clones.” He explains, holding your gaze. “We were created as part of an experimental unit exploring various enhancements. Hunter has enhanced senses, Wrecker increased strength, and I have a high intellect.” 
“That...makes a lot of sense.” You say. “I figured you were involved in the war. I heard all about your battle strategies and whatnot.” 
“Yes, that could have been very inconvenient if you had been involved with the Separatists.” He adjusts his goggles as he stares at you. “The Kaminoans weren’t sure if the clones would experience soulmates, but the first generation began developing links almost immediately. It complicated things, as soulmate links are strong motivators and many clones deserted in order to find and be with their soulmates. The Kaminoans had to take rather extreme measures and forbid us from attempting to contact or initiate the bond. Those that met their mates had to reject them, as the Jedi do. When I realized we shared a telepathic connection I was worried that may put the Republic in danger, but I assessed you were not a threat.” 
“Thanks.” You say flatly, taking in his words. 
“I wish we could have come sooner, but with the Empire after us after we deserted, I didn’t want to put you at risk. Now that things have settled down, I brought us to this planet in hopes of locating you. I used your thoughts to discern which planet you were on and if it would be suitable for us to hide, or perhaps even settle down somewhere permanently.” He continues, barely pausing to breathe. “I did pay attention to your thoughts. I didn’t understand many of them early on, but I’ve grown to understand you.” 
You blink a bit at his words. He had located you solely on your thoughts, which meant he really had seen and heard them. Even though he hadn’t responded much, and from what it sounds like for a good reason, he had still heard you. 
“You think a lot.” You say lamely, scrambling for a reply. You’re not quite sure what to say. For a while you had been upset that he seemed to ignore you, but from what it sounds like, he hadn’t been ignoring you at all. 
“Yes, a byproduct of my genetic enhancements.” He says. 
“It’s strange, now.” You say, leaning back in your seat, looking out at the town lights in the far distance. “Everything’s so quiet. As annoying as it was sometimes...I never really did feel alone. You...had perfect timing.” 
“Well, they do say fate is never wrong.” 
You smile. “I guess so. My grandparents built this place from the ground up. They were fugitives, on the run from the Republic.” His eyes widen a bit at that statement. “They came across this place by accident, like most do, and decided to settle down. My parents stayed here too, keeping it running while my grandparents got older and eventually passed. My brothers left as soon as they could. I haven’t seen them since. It was around that time you showed up. Shortly after my dad got sick. My mom didn’t last long after he passed. That left me alone. Well, alone with a clone talking in my head.” You smile softly at him. “I’m glad you’re here now.” 
***
You wake early as usual, the others rising around the same time. Must have been a side effect of being a soldier. You make breakfast before heading out to the barn. You start Wrecker and Hunter on moving some things before taking Tech and Echo to the barely functioning equipment. 
“This one’s the most important.” You pat the combine affectionately. “I was in town to get a part when I ran into you yesterday. She starts, but as soon as you put her in gear, she dies.” 
Tech rubs his chin, staring at it. “I can fix that.” 
The guys settle in easily, jumping right into helping you with the farm. Tech and Echo are a blessing in disguise, quickly getting all of the equipment back up and running more efficiently than they had before. Wrecker and Hunter help you with the more physical things, setting everything up for the coming harvest. Omega becomes your shadow, happily learning about the plants, their growth stages, and how to know when they’re ready to harvest. 
It feels nice, having the farm full of life again. It feels like it used to, when your family had been all together. In a way, you’ve found a new family. You know your parents would be proud, after they got over the shock of you letting complete strangers in. 
After the farming equipment is fixed, Tech moves his sights to the house, fixing and updating everything he can get his hands on. Anything broken or almost broken, he’s quick to jump in with an “I can fix that.” 
You both also begin to grow closer, albeit slowly. Just as you had suspected with his raging thoughts, he constantly needed to be doing something. Finding time to be alone with him is hard, even with the others trying to help. Currently his attention is being taken up by a schematic for a new barn. He had already planned out an expansion of the house for the others for more privacy, which was a sweet thought, but you want to have time with him. 
Your moment comes when you get up late one night, heading to the kitchen for a drink. Your mind has been running nonstop with the harvest nearly upon you and all of the details you had to make sure were perfect. It’s a bit different this time, now that you have help, but habits are hard to break and you can’t stop trying to make sure every little thing gets addressed. 
You head into the kitchen, spotting a glow from the living room. You peek your head around the corner, spotting Tech lounging on the couch in the dark, face illuminated by the glow of a datapad. 
“Tech?” You ask quietly, stepping into the living room, flipping on a light. “What are you doing out here?” 
He looks up, barely moving the datapad. “Wrecker decided to lock me out of the room tonight.”
“Oh.” You say lamely. “That’s not very nice.” 
He shrugs. “Can’t say I’ll miss his snoring.” 
You bite your lip, staring at his scrunched figure on the couch. You shift on your feet nervously, butterflies fluttering in your stomach. “You could...come to my room.” 
Your heart is pounding a bit as you stare at him. You had yet to be so forward with him, both of you dancing around that first step. He stares back over the top of the datapad, eyes wide. For a moment you regret offering. For a moment you wish you could hear his thoughts again. 
"It...might be more comfortable." You hurry to add, not wanting to scare him off. "I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep right now and I could use some company."
He moves slowly, hesitantly. He pushes himself to sit up, rising from the couch. You forget how tall he is, used to seeing him hunched over something. You turn, making your way to your room. He follows behind you, carrying the datapad with him. 
You turn to him as your door closes, his eyes scanning your room. He’s drawn to the photos on the wall, ones of you and your family. You come to stand next to him, telling him about each photo. Perhaps you’d have to add some more soon. 
“My grandparents.” You point to the last one. “After their first harvest. They were so good at this, running a farm. They made it seem so easy.” You move, sitting on the edge of your bed. “There’s so much to think about, though. Everything has to go right because if one thing goes wrong it can mess up the harvest and ruin your entire year. They were so effortlessly good at it. It was like a second sense. They knew exactly when to harvest and could read the weather just by looking at the plants.” You shake your head, tears brimming. “I’m so scared of failing. It’s so hard to do alone and...I don’t want to be alone anymore.” 
He kneels down in front of you, setting the datapad on the bed. His hand cups your chin, lifting your face so you’re looking at him. His thumb wipes the tear that slides down your cheek, his gaze soft as he stares at you. “I can fix that.” 
He says it so softly, so sweetly, you want to melt right into the bed. You lean into his touch, feeling the rough fabric of his glove. You desperately want to feel his skin against yours. You stare into his eyes, feeling the magnetic pull between you. You can’t help it, the tension that had been building up over the last few weeks since you’d run into him in town beginning to boil over. 
He’s hesitant as your lips touch, holding back a bit. He’s probably never been kissed. You haven’t either, just going off of what feels right. You can practically hear the wheels turning in his head, the thoughts that are probably racing. Once again, you wish you could hear them this close. 
“You’re thinking too much.” You whisper, pulling away for a second. 
Your fingers grab at his shirt, pulling him in closer as you kiss him once more. He finally moves, his arms slipping around you. You pull him as close as you can, your own arms wrapping around him. You never want to let go. You want to stay in this moment forever. You finally feel whole. For the first time in a long time you don’t feel alone. 
Tech’s hands slip under your thighs, lifting you as he stands. It’s so effortless, like you almost don’t weigh anything. He kneels on the bed, dropping you against the pillows. He falls with you, catching himself on his hands above you. You stare up at him, shivering at the intensity in his gaze as he stares down at you. 
“Tech,” You whisper, reaching for him as he lowers himself into you. 
His body slots between your legs perfectly, like he was made to be there. Well, in a way he was. He fits against you like you’re two puzzle pieces, every ridge of his body matching the slope of yours. 
He kisses you harder this time, pulling his gloves off. His bare hands trail up your arms, awakening every nerve ending as they go. Your body feels alive with energy as he touches you, your brain screaming for more. You want to get closer, you want to feel every bit of him that you can. 
“I can feel it,” He murmurs, trailing his lips down your throat. “The soulmate link. The bond between us forming. It’s been studied over and over but still the actual science of it is not understood entirely. At first they thought perhaps it was brain chemicals sending the signals, but while those do play a role, it’s not entirely what draws two people together so perfectly.” 
Your hands tug at his shirt as he rambles, your own discarded on the floor already. “And I don’t think they ever will.” You say, tugging his shirt off as he sits up. “I don’t think it’s something that can be explained in words.” 
He stares down at you, his eyes trailing down your body. Your chest warms a bit under his gaze, your skin prickling with anticipation. “You are sure this is what you want?” He asks, as if it was even a question. 
“If you don’t get me naked right now...” You don’t have to finish the empty threat, his hands tugging your pants off in one pull. 
You’re already wet, your body more than ready for what it had been anticipating. Most soulmates didn’t make it weeks after finally meeting and initiating their bond. Of course, you and Tech had had minimal contact with each other, but your proximity had been very close. You’re not sure how you’ve made it this long, aside from the mounting stress of the coming harvest keeping the desire at bay. 
Tech slides his hands along your sides, sitting up between your thighs. He parts them gently, staring down at your glistening folds. You smile softly, sitting up a little and grabbing his hand. You guide him to your clit, guiding him on how to please you. 
You moan quietly as he takes over, picking it up quickly. Thank the maker he’s a quick learner. You let your body drop back onto the bed, sighing out another moan. “Kriff, Tech. Just like that.” 
The pleasure builds within you, igniting your body. It feels so good, unlike anything you’ve ever felt before. There’s a coil tightening in your belly, pressure building within you. 
You grab his hand before you cum, stopping him. “I want you inside me.” You say, sitting up to tug at his pants. 
He stands from the bed, letting them drop. You gape at the size of him, opening your legs wider. He crawls between them, pumping his hand over his length a couple times. “I’ve never done this before.” He says, staring down at you. 
“I haven’t either.” You say, swallowing nervously. You’re not sure why you’re nervous. You trust him. 
You wrap a hand around him, guiding him in place. He lowers himself to hover over you, letting your hand do the work. You wince a bit as he presses in, putting a hand on his hip to still him. You probably should have prepared a bit more for this, but you’re too desperate to feel him to care. 
You squeeze his hip, telling him to move. Your arms wrap around his back, holding on as he slowly works his way inside you. The stretch burns a bit, but his lips on your shoulder help distract from the discomfort. 
He groans once he’s seated inside you, his face pressing against your neck. You cling to him, finally feeling whole and content since his arrival. You can’t help but feel like this is where you’re supposed to be, right here in his arms. Despite the discomfort you shift your hips, moving him inside you. 
“Tech,” You murmur, your lips brushing his ear. 
He hums against your neck, gently kissing the skin. 
“Move.” You say, shifting your hips once more. 
He presses up onto his elbows, looking down at you as he begins to rock his hips. It’s a bit awkward and sloppy at first, but he picks up a rhythm quickly. Your lips part as you stare up at him, holding his gaze behind his goggles. You get lost in the intensity of them, the focus as he stares at you. You want to know what he’s thinking, you want to know what’s running through that head of his right now. 
He leans down to kiss you as his fingers find your clit, swallowing your moans as you cum. His thrusts turn sloppy, pressing into you once more before he releases inside of you. You both stay still, lips brushing in soft kisses as you take each other in. 
Tech pulls away from you, stepping into your fresher to grab a cloth to clean you both up with before he slides under the covers with you. You rest against his chest, wrapping an arm around him as he holds you. 
“Tech?” You ask, breaking the comfortable silence. He hums, fingers tracing patterns on your back. “You could have easily unlocked the door.” 
He chuckles, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “Yes, I could have. Perhaps I was hoping for an invitation.” 
“You’ve never needed one.” You lean up, pressing a kiss to his lips. “You know that. You’ve always been welcome here.” 
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murkycran · 26 days
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Radiostatic/Voxal Fic Rec List
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Welcome to my Radiostatic/Voxal Fic Rec List! ^_^ This will include romantic, platonic, and/or queerplatonic Radiostatic fics (and admittedly probably a couple of Radiosilence fics, too).
I will keep updating this periodically as I read more fics, so feel free to check back every once and a while! I'll reblog it when I update it, plus make a note with the date at the top. Trust me, this is by no means a complete list; there's fics I still want to add to this that I just haven't gotten to yet. I just decided to go ahead and post it anyways, because if I kept waiting until I ran out of fics to rec I'd probably be working on this forever.
These are not in any particular order; I'm going by both my Bookmarks list on AO3 and my memory of fics I forgot to bookmark. I also tried to make notes on what fics were written before season 1 released, but I might have missed some, so keep that in mind.
Please let me know if any links don't work or are wrong!
✨Before you proceed:✨ read the tags on these fics if you decide to read them. Many of them have heavy material - no surprise given the fandom, but still, felt like this needed said. On that note, there's also fics with explicit material and some fics are straight up PWP. Again, read at your own risk/heed the tags.
Fic Rec List Masterpost
Staticmoth Fic Rec List
Misc. Vox Fic Rec List
------
Radio Healed the Video Star by Aspiring_Forest_Witch
Summary: Alastor comes across an unconscious and battered Vox while out on one of his strolls. He feels compelled to bring him back to the hotel.
Notes: 98% of this fic was written before season 1 was released, so keep that in mind, because there's obviously going to be inconsistencies with canon. It's nearly finished (at least according to the author's notes in the latest chapters, I think). I suggest pacing yourself with this one - it's nearly 700k words long. I ruined a good sleep schedule staying up to get through it. (So worth it though.) There are quite a few OCs in later chapters, but they're such good OCs. You fall in love with them just as much as the canon characters, I swear. I would die for Verity and the Trio.
Let's Misbehave by joosymango
Summary: Alastor wins a bet against Vox, now his rival must stop pestering him for two weeks. It should be a pleasant break! So why does he miss the idiot?
Notes: Vaguely inspired by Aspiring_Forest_Witch's Radio Healed the Video Star. Also largely written before season 1 release. First fic I read for the HH fandom. ^_^
Safe with Me Series by rillo (rillyrillo)
Summary: Having only ever set his sights on men who treat women with odious disrespect, Alastor never thought he'd take interest in Vox's turbulent relationship with his fiancé and business partner, Valentino. He decides to lend a helping hand in the hopes of getting Vox out of his sticky situation. After all, what are childhood enemies for?
Unfortunately, neither Alastor nor Vox could've predicted the rollercoaster of unsaid emotions and future horrors that are thrown their way. Will they be able to rely on each other and get by unscathed? Or will destiny have other plans for these two?
[HUMAN AU] [There's art included for the human designs]
Notes: It's so, so good. ;-; Heed the tags. There's a prequel consisting of oneshots, plus a sequel (listed below, bc I can't not put it here)! And there's ART! So much art!
You, My Everything by rillo (rillyrillo)
Summary: Some say that love can conquer all, even in Hell.
Vox begged to differ, and he was damn well sure Alastor did too – or at least he would be, if Alastor hadn’t become one big question mark.
Sequel to Safe with Me.
Notes: Only read if you've read Safe With Me!!! Still pretty early in the story but so good. ;-; The angst, I swear...
You're on the Air by rillo (rillyrillo)
Summary: A series of short, daily conversations between a radio host and his avid listener, as the two learn more about each other’s lives over the air. Set in the late 90s/early 2000s.
Notes: Same author as Safe with Me, but not set in the same universe! This one is set up in a literal radio show format; almost entirely dialogue-centric.
Of Candied Pine and Cherried Smoke by rillo (rillyrillo)
Summary: Inspired by x_Arcticfox_x’s fanfiction: Blue Raspberries And Cherry Cola
After overdosing on them one too many times to curb the steadily weakening suppressants, Vox's body rejects them outright. Now with his scent getting stronger, he finds himself struggling to hide his true status as an Omega. In his desperation, he seeks help from the one person that knows his secret: Alastor.
Notes: Omegaverse. Same author as Safe with Me series and You're on the Air!
Blue Raspberries And Cherry Cola by x_Arcticfox_x
Summary: Vox is an omega, that's his biggest secret.
During his life time he hid this fact using suppressants, and counited to in death. One day he runs out of pills and his supplier is out of stock for the time being so Vox is forced to submit to the torture of going through heat for the first time in decades.
Too bad his business partner only see's omega's as mere object's...
But hey, at least Angel found him just in time, right?
Notes: Omegaverse. Currently on hold, but has 14 chapters currently available for reading. :)
Once Bitten, Twice Shy by The_Penny_Tails
Summary: Alastor decides that it's time to claim what is rightfully his, consequences be damned.
Notes: It's not porn but it might as well have been for how fucking intense this scene was. 😳
Dripping Pink by The_Penny_Tails
Summary: Just before an Overlord meeting, Alastor gets infected by an off-market, highly potent, and incredibly dangerous love potion. Nobody realises until it's too late.
Notes: Simultaneously funny as fuck and erotic as all hell. I suffered from so much secondhand embarrassment on Vox's behalf. It's wonderful. :D
Lucidity's Fog by The_Penny_Tails
Summary: Ever since he met Alastor, Vox has been having raunchy dreams about the deer. Those dreams suddenly stop when Alastor disappears. For seven years, he's free of the guilt, of the shame brought on by his unconscious desire.
Until Alastor comes back, and Vox is plagued by a new dream the same day he finds out about the news. This time, however, something is distinctively different about how the deer is acting.
Notes: Author tagged for light angst, but ngl the ending did not feel like 'light' angst to me lol. Hurt in a good way.
Finger Tips and Dotted Lips by The_Penny_Tails
Summary: Alastor has sensitive hands; he finds this out at the most inconvenient time possible. Unfortunately, Vox is the one who ends up paying the price for it.
Having to help a seemingly broken Overlord whilst navigating this new discovery proves to be a little more taxing than the Radio Demon could ever have imagined.
Notes: Alastor is such a troll in this omg.
Thawing Out by Seaside_Dreaming
Summary: Seeing a small crack in Vox's screen nags at Alastor more than he likes to admit.
Vox wishes things were better. Sooner or later, Alastor has to come to terms with the fact he has feelings, in general.
Notes: Written before season 1 release. HIGHLY suggest reading the prequel one-shot. It's not necessary to understand the plot here, but you should read it anyway.
Static by passthevoxcord
Summary: Vox creates a new and improved version of himself to please Val, only to be replaced by it. He is left beaten and broken with no one to turn to . . . except maybe his oldest enemy, Alastor.
Notes: Written before season 1 release.
Hating you feels so good by TwoBitJester
Summary: Vox obsesses over his returned enemy and finds himself a little too wound up
Notes: Very good PWP.
Laced Over Dinner by hazbinhearts
Summary: Vox is persuaded to dress a little differently over dinner for Alastor, but finds it remarkably uncomfortable as the night goes on. Written for VoxWeek21 Day 3: dressing up [appearance, formal, dance].
Notes: Written before season 1 release. Corsets. 😳
Observer by DeviousPossum
Summary: He moved the cursor to click off, when he suddenly heard a very recognizable static laced tone.
Alastor.
Alastor.
What the fuck. Alastor is singing.
Vox unintentionally ran claw marks across his desk, an increasingly common habit for him as of late. He grimaced at his now ruined table and unsuccessfully tried to reel in an inexplicable feeling that could only be described as jealousy.
Notes: Porn with a tiny bit of plot in the first chapter. :3
RadioTV Week 2021 Series by Heliosolar
Summary: Pretty much the title; various prompts.
Notes: Written before season 1 release. All worth reading, though they aren't connected.
Sharkblocking by Anonymous
Summary: Alastor is Vox’s number one rival. Incidentally, though nobody involved is aware of it, Alastor’s number one rival is actually Vox’s pet shark.
In which Alastor is actually a little obsessed back and Vark is the biggest obstacle to Radiostatic short of canon itself.
Notes: VARK!
Control + V by TooManyPsuedonyms
Summary: Vox and Alastor have a... thing. Not quite a relationship, but something. Vox is too scared to define it properly, and Alastor is dead set that Vox will eventually get bored of his lack of reciprocity and move on.
So, Valentino tries to show Vox what he is missing.
... too bad Vox didn't want him like that. ... too bad Alastor didn't know want is a vague word.
Notes: Heed the tags!!! There's currently a sequel; I haven't read it yet, but I definitely plan to. 👀
gift of the magi by vol_ctrl
Summary: "... Although husband and wife are now left with gifts that neither one can use, they realize how far they are willing to go to show their love for each other, and how priceless their love really is ..."
Alastor/Vox established relationship fluff.
Notes: Written before season 1 release. Very sweet. ^_^
the lost tape by vol_ctrl
Summary: There's a NEW ambitious media demon in Pentagram City. You never get a second chance to make a first impression, right?
Notes: Written before season 1 release.
12 Days of Yuletide by vol_ctrl
Summary: A parody of the 12 Days of Christmas traditional tune, as can only be done by Vox gifting to his beloved adversary.
Or, a series of letters from the desk of Alastor upon receiving a series of increasingly elaborate gifts from his insufferably modern foil during the holiday season.
Notes: Written before season 1 release.
Fear makes the heart grow fonder by Graysongirl
Summary: After a bit of inspiration from an unlikely source Vox comes up with the plan that scaring Alastor is the best route to gaining his affections. The haunted house at LuLu World seems like the perfect (safe) environment for a bit of pre-planned scaring...
[Stand-alone staticradio]
Notes: Written before season 1 release. Funny af. "Red! Red!" XD
Cordyceps, King of Ants by spappest
Summary: Vox is tired. Of Valentino. Of Velvette. Of Alastor, and Hell, and everything in between. He can't escape, but he can cut himself off, piece by piece, until he feels nothing at all. Alastor takes exception to this approach and commissions a certain princess of Hell to fix his foe. Now Vox has a hotel of misfits on one side of him, overlords on the other, and Alastor crushing his cage ever smaller.
Clearly, the only way Vox will get any peace and quiet is to just kill God.
Valentino did always tell him that he had no chill.
Notes: Started before season 1 was released. Technically features Staticmoth but it's not the focus as much as Radiostatic (which honestly has a relationship status of ??? not romantic but also not friendship or even strictly enemies...just...Alastor and Vox). O_O I think about this fic on a daily basis.
Russian Roulette by spappest
Summary: Vox and Alastor play a game that Vox is way too excited to lose.
Notes: Started before season 1 release. Take note!!! I'm putting this on the Radiostatic list because it's almost entirely centered on Alastor and Vox's dynamic, but the romantic relationship is Staticmoth. The Staticmoth is just not featured very much.
Vox and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Afterlife by spappest
Summary: Alastor goes into rut.
Vox has a bad time. Then a good time. Then a very bad time. Then a brief vacation. Then a confusing time.
Notes: Background Staticmoth, but Radiostatic is most prominent. Funny af. Alastor and Vox have...a very special relationship. Lol.
Killer Ex by FanGirl48
Summary: Alastor was a serial killer who valued his privacy. So when someone who claims to know what he is tries to barge into his life he can't let them live, his secret must be protected at all cost.
A normally easy task easy task becomes complicated when Alastor's ex-boyfriend is dragged into the whole thing forcing the serial killer to go visit them for the first time in seven years.
Notes: Human AU. Love me some possessive Alastor. <3
Negotiations by FanGirl48
Summary: Vox had no interest in attending a meeting between Heaven and Hell following the failed attack by the Adam and his Exterminators. Alastor's little gremlin caused the mess, so he can go clean it up. Vox had nothing wanted nothing to do with the radio demon, king of hell or heaven.
But that was before Lucifer made the media overlord aware of Valentino's little job offer to his daughter.
Damnit Valentino!
Notes: "And they were roommates!" "Oh my god they were roommates"
Down, Up, and Back Down by CowboyEnthusiast
Summary: Vox dies. Surprisingly no one takes this well.
Or, Vox dies and Alastor tries to drag his soul back from Purgatory.
Notes: Another fic I think about daily... Heavy themes. Heed the tags.
Hold Me Like a Grudge by Rachello344
Summary: Alastor has spent a long time running from Vox. Vox has chased after him almost as long. When suppressants fail throughout the city, they finally collide.
Notes: Omegaverse. Fun fact about this author: all their Radiostatic fic titles are from Fall Out Boy lyrics lol. (I fucking love FOB sue me.) I haven't yet read all of Rachello344's Radiostatic fics, BUT I have them all on my To Read list because I've loved everything I've read of theirs so far lol.
What Makes You So Special? by Rachello344
Summary: With Lucifer’s return to the Pride Ring, the other Deadly Sins were bound to take notice. When Asmodeus stops by the Pride Ring to visit the Morningstars, the Vees are able to make a deal to host a pop-up shop of the incredibly popular Lust Ring establishment, Ozzie’s, bringing it to the Pride Ring for the first time.
When Vox and Alastor both attend the restaurant’s opening night, long repressed sparks fly, forever changing their relationship.
Notes: Because of the pacing of this (sex first romance later), I feel like this is the Radiostatic equivalent of Femalefonzie's Freak-A-Zoid (a really good Staticmoth fic). This is hands down one of the most romantic Radiostatic fics I've read. ^_^
Hold Me Tight (or Don't) by Rachello344
Summary: Alastor and Vox finally come to an understanding, both of each other and of what they each mean to the other. Their relationship evolves accordingly, one concession at a time, until they both get everything they could possibly want: power, companionship, and even love.
Notes: So, so good.
Keep You Like an Oath by Rachello344
Summary: Alastor normally wouldn’t bother with the chore—breaking into V Tower was quite a lot of work, even for him—but he found himself curious about what Vox and his little friends might be working on. Especially since whatever it was had Angel concerned enough to report back to the rest of the hotel about it.
Of course, before he can learn anything, he’ll need to sneak past Vox’s watchful eye…
Notes: God it's just...so good. Read it. Radiostatic reconciliation. One thing I love about Rachello344 writing Radiostatic is Alastor's terms of endearment for Vox. ^_^
To Be Yours by pinegreenapples
Summary: Alastor hears something he hasn't heard in years. He decides to investigate why now, of all times, this frequency has turned back on. Vox is not amused.
Notes: Hurt no comfort. Hurts so good, though. ;-;
oleanders in june by spoondrifts
Summary: It seems like while Alastor was off preying on the self-destructive addictions of desperate sinners, Vox was off getting himself beaten half to death, probably from spouting belligerent nonsense at someone with violent tendencies and a far lower threshold for disrespect than Alastor. Not everyone finds poor Vox’s chatter as charming as he does.
If Vox is unconscious, then Vox is not being entertaining, and Alastor came here to have fun, not play nursemaid.
Or: Drunk on power and itching to cause some mayhem, Alastor hunts down the only person in the city who's always up for anything. Unfortunately, he finds Vox... not exactly in tip-top shape. No matter; he can work with that too.
Notes: ^_^ Very sweet.
equilibrium by curtailed
Summary: Post-Finale. The Hotel finds Alastor right on the front lawn, unconscious and bleeding, still injured from Adam's blade. While he recovers, all of Hell scrambles to find out who his mysterious rescuer is.
Meanwhile, Vox tries not to freak out that he might have accidentally made a soul bond to save that deer asshole's life. All he had wanted to do was to scope out the ruins of Alastor's radio tower. Fuck him for being curious, he supposed.
Notes: This fic has me in a CHOKEHOLD. I love the characterizations so, so much. Manages to fit in humor alongside the angst. One of the best fight scenes I've ever seen put into words. Curtailed really took Vox and Alastor as characters and planned out a cool fucking fight scene using their unique abilities. I automatically love anything tagged with "one fell first but the other fell harder" lol.
candlelight by curtailed
Summary: Despite the #SirRepentious success, Heaven remains skeptical of a sinner's ability to change. Logic gets lost somewhere, and really, what's a better way to show sinners can be marginally less horrible than to stick two Overlords who hate each other in the same living space?
OR
Alastor and Vox play house.
Notes: The comedy of Alastor and Vox being forced to be civil with each other and then unintentionally becoming very domestic together. Lol
wallow by curtailed
Summary: A 2+1 fic. Two times when Alastor and Vox were in a love triangle (hard quote on love, hard quote on triangle), and the one time Alastor had Vox to himself.
Notes: Only 1 (very good) chapter so far, but safe to say pretty heavy already. Heed the tags.
Addicted by Dancingdog
Summary: After the latest argument with Valentino, Vox finds himself at the Hazbin Hotel. An injured Alastor is less-than-pleased to see him, which is understandable considering they are enemies.
But as more and more of Valentino's venom leaves his system, Vox begins to remember his days before V-Tower and he learns exactly why Alastor rejected his offer all those decades ago.
His memories return in fits and spurts - not all of them good. His past with Alastor isn't something he expected and it turns out that he isn't the only one suffering.
Notes: Dude. This fic hurt me. Such good angst.
Radio Made the Video Star Series by songofhell
Summary: Snippets of Vox and Alastor's afterlife, and their journey from strangers to friends to enemies to... something more.
Notes: Pretty much what the series summary says - a series of installments that chronicle the beginning and subsequent evolution of Alastor and Vox's relationship. Very good, has tons of possessive!Alastor, which I die for.
Uneasy by Saezs
Summary: “Something’s wrong with Voxy.”
Velvette’s eyes snapped to the tall moth pimp. “And?” she prompted with a raised eyebrow. As if she needed to deal with two piss babies this close to a show. Valentino shrugged, tapping away on his phone, and walked away to stand threateningly close to her new models. Before she could snap at him, she saw it; his wings were twitching. Barely noticeable to strangers, just under the hum of the building’s lights, he was squeaking with each tap of his fingers. She felt unease and a healthy dose of aggravation swirl in her stomach.
Or: Vox was roofied and sexually assaulted. Velvette tries to be better than her mother. Unexpected connections are formed.
Notes: Heed the tags! Features genderfluid Vox. :)
Five Times Vox and Alastor Danced and One Time They Didn't by Drowsy_Salamander
Summary: “I say, good fellow, what are you doing on the ground like that?”
The voice was perky, cheerful, and bright. It had a crisp mid-Atlantic accent, the kind Vox remembered being all the rage for stage and film performers back when he first entered the broadcast industry. The diction was crystal clear with every sound enunciated separately to maximise clarity, the consonants clicked and the vowels were broad. It was a performer’s voice.
A voice for radio.
Oh shit.
... Five times Vox and Alastor danced and one time Vox and Alastor didn't.
From their first meeting through their friendship, to their enmity and fighting. From infatuation to yearning to animosity. Dancing is a partnership, is it not?
Notes: Each chapter so far has been a different type of dance, which is really neat. Especially chapter 2. ^_^ That said, there's a feeling of impending doom, knowing what happens to their relationship eventually... Not saying that as a deterrent but just a comment on how I felt while reading it lol. It's very sweet, which is why it hurts to think of future chapters. 🙃
Days Long Past by Momo52
Summary: All sinners of hell bore some physical marks of how they lived and died. Some physical manifestations were more obvious while others were subtle. Vox was not an exception to this rule.
While his television head was an obvious indication of his life while on Earth, the mark he bore from his death was far more subdued. Luckily enough, his shame was easily concealed behind a high collar. Unfortunately, he is just as well known in his afterlife as he was in his life. As such, trying to make everyone believe that he is so much stronger than what his death implies is a constant battle. He only wished that he wasn’t the hardest one to convince.
Notes: I think platonic Radiostatic is the endgame here. Still pretty early in the story, but I'm really liking this author's depiction of Vox and Alastor's pasts. Heed the tags. There are heavy subjects such as suicide (very big theme for Vox's pov) and period-typical racism (in Alastor's past) present in the story.
Remote Access by x-UsoTsuki-x (its_not_reael)
Summary: In the aftermath of Alastor and Vox's electrifying on-air showdown, Vox finds himself unusually rattled. His usual suave demeanor is slipping, much to his cohorts' amusement – and concern. Velvet can do little more than roll her eyes at his antics. Valentino, on the other hand, is convinced that all Vox needs to do is get fucked and relax.
or, alternatively...
The tech-savvy overlord manages to snag a virus from a porn site and finds himself in the arms of his worst enemy.
Notes: Fairly certain this is firmly Radiosilence based on the tags (and the direction of the story so far). Very funny, very hot. Vox is pathetic in this one. Lol
Nun-thing Like You've Ever Seen Series by A_Cypress_Coffin
Summary: Alastor, the feared radio demon with more blood on his hands than most of hell combined, wasn't always as we imagine him. There was a time where instead of a dapper suit and smile he donned a simple vow and habit. That didn't last of course, but the journey is quite something.
Notes: This author has a great sense of humor, lmao. I enjoyed the unique headcanons for Alastor's backstory. The tag that hooked me: "Accidentally becoming a better person through bad domming and found family".
Empathia by The_Oblivious_Swallow
Summary: Creating new technology is boring, sex is physically unappealing, the other Vee’s are so annoying, annoying, annoying! Even Vark, his baby, his pride and joy, doesn’t stir the same joy in his heart like he should.
So, Vox had concluded that it had to go. For his sake.
Notes: Contains Staticmoth, but Radiostatic seems like the endgame (I write this as there is one chapter still left). Really interesting idea. I love Vox.exe so much. ;-;
Every Madman Has His Vice by phantasm_png (chibellero)
Summary: “What the fuck do you want, Alastor? Was it not enough to kill me all those years ago? Now, you had to go for the people I loved and the only things I had left in this fucking Hellhole?”
“It was my fault,” Alastor whispers as he approaches Vox slowly, as if he was some sort of wounded animal he didn’t want to scare off. His prey. “Vox, I’m sorry. If I had a chance to redo that night, I would never have hurt you to this extent. I’ll never harm you again.”
“That’s seven years too fucking late, Alastor.”
OR: Seven years ago, instead of Alastor disappearing, it was Vox who left instead.
Notes: I’m so fucking here for this AU. Possessive Alastor, Vox helping with the hotel, Husk is still an Overlord, yessss
Metathesiophobia (Fear of Change) by phantasm_png (chibellero)
Summary: There's a lot that can change in seven years.
But never once had Alastor expected for something like this from his old rival and older friend.
Or, Alastor and Vox start to rekindle their old friendship again after a shocking discovery strikes the deer demon.
Notes: QPR Radiostatic with MtF Vox! Contains a smidge of Staticmoth, but it's in the background and not the focus. Very well written.
surimi and venison by phantasm_png (chibellero)
Summary: A series of short drabbles (500+ words) in an interconnected universe (peep the tags, they're still in hell), centering around Alastor and his new pet fish... shark... television thing. Will (hopefully) update 1-2 times a week. Written as my attempt at a Mermay series.
Notes: Like the summary says, Mermay prompts featuring SharkHybrid!Vox, along with Alastor, who literally saw Vox and decided to make him his pet. Lol.
an arm and a leg, my dear, les yeux d'la tête by phantasm_png (chibellero)
Summary: “I mean, usually when Val gets mad he gets like, super pissy too an’ starts destroyin’ shit ‘round the set and in his clubs, but like, usually Vox can calm him down. Problem is, where the Hell is that guy? I haven’t seen ‘im round the Tower for like, a month or two now. That ain’t normal.”
“What, so you mean he just up and left?”
“No, but like… he hasn’t been seen ‘in public’ for like, two months now. It’s startin’ to get suspicious. Like, I ‘unno if I’m just paranoid or something, but… Vox is like, the fuckin’ face of Hell’s Entertainment District. When he’s not round for a bit, that’s nothing to worry about on its own… but when he’s not round for a bit an’ Val and Velvette are creeping around, looking for his rival…? I mean… the dots are connecting. If Al did something…”
“If Vox was dead, we would know.” OR: Two months ago, Vox went missing. Right now, it seems as if Alastor has something to hide.
Notes: Vox gets attic-wifed and wears a virgin killer sweater. ^_^
we'll go down together in the ashes of our love by phantasm_png (chibellero)
Summary: Glimpses into the Radio Demon's life as he reluctantly navigates parenthood with his co-parenting partner and the demon princess hoisted onto him by the King and Queen of Hell.
Loosely inspired by Spy X Family.
Notes: CUTE! I love domestic Radiostatic.
What Has Been by Tianren
Summary: Vox has never known peace. From being the son of a egocentric cult leader, to being the boyfriend of a self absorbed abuser. Vox has managed to build a pretty sad life for himself. The only spot of sunshine that had ever blessed his existence was when he met an amateur true crime investigative journalist, with a podcast named, Alastor. The man was his only source of unfiltered news and contact to the world outside his father’s compound. But after Vox finally escaped the cult he waited for Alastor. Waited weeks in their assigned meeting spot just to be forgotten. Vox was convinced he’d stopped waiting for Alastor years ago until he meets the man again seven years later at a hotel. What will reconnecting with his past lead to and will it help him escape the hell he’s built for himself?
Takes place in the late 2000s early 2010s
Trigger warning for religious trauma and abuse as major themes of this story. Will add more warnings if they arise as I go on.
Notes: Really interesting human AU concept!
(Fic rec list to be continued)
109 notes · View notes
mrsshabana · 1 year
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Patient!Gyutaro x Nurse!Reader - CHAPTER 1
Chapter 2
✦ CW: 18+ MDNI, female reader. Mentions of mental illness, suicide, and sexual abuse of a minor. This fic has many dark themes, please do not read unless you are comfortable!
✦ AN: The long awaited nurse au is finally here! Sorry it took me so long, but I wanted to make sure it was perfect. Lots of thought and research went into making this fic. There will also be art included in this chapter!
✦ WC: 2,146
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This is what you should have expected from a job in the medical field that didn’t require much qualifications. Working at an asylum wasn’t ideal, but they are incredibly desperate for new nurses. As most of them are unable to handle the physical and mental toll that a place like this puts on someone. 
It’s your first day at your new job. You were excited until you entered the building. The dreary interior mixed with the groans and screams of unruly patients wasn’t the welcome that you had been hoping for.
You’re young, almost too young to be working at a place like this. The other nurses didn’t take you seriously, and they were going to make the transition for you more difficult than it needed to be. You were being assigned to a patient that is notorious for being difficult to work with. The other nurses use him to weed out the weak. Always shifting the new hires to care for him. They usually leave within the first week, so his care returns to one of the veteran nurses known for having a mind of steel. She’s cold hearted, but that helps you deal with a job like this. The complete opposite of you. A warm young woman, eager to treat and rehabilitate.
Currently you are being led to your new patient. Quickly scanning over his records as you follow the nurse through the halls of the sanatorium.
Rashomon Riverbank Asylum
Patient Record
Name: Shabana, Gyutaro
Identification Data: Sex: Male Age: 23 Height: 6’ 3” Weight: 134
Race: Asian Hair: Black Eye: Blue
Special Handling Code: Code Red; Keep medicated Special Handling Instructions: Keep away from sharp objects
Medical History: Multiple suicide attempts, Complications due to sickle cell anemia, Treated for Congenital Syphilis
Diagnoses: Sickle Cell Anemia Hutchinson’s Teeth Borderline Personality Disorder Antisocial Personality Disorder Depression Insomnia
Current Medical Treatment: Special diet for weight gain Medications given AM & PM
Medications: Wellbutrin - 100 mg twice daily Abilify - 10 mg once daily Carbamazepine - 350 mg twice daily Xanax - 2 mg twice daily Trazodone - 150 mg once daily Voxelotor - 500 mg once daily Adakveo - 5 mg IV infusion once every 4 weeks
Gyutaro Shabana, your very first patient at Rashomon Riverbank Asylum. Looking over his record, this is going to be a difficult one. You’ve learned about a majority of these diagnoses in college, so you have a good idea about the kind of treatment he will require. It’s strange though, he seems to have lost the genetic lottery. And you haven't even seen his face yet, you can only imagine what he may look like.
An asian man with sickle cell anemia is almost unheard of, roughly 0.0022%. And on top of that he was born with Congenital Syphilis. It’s quite frankly amazing that he’s lived past 20.
“Just introduce yourself, then I’ll take you to your other patients,” the other nurse says as she stops in front of his door. 
Not wanting to be impolite, you hesitantly knock on his door. There’s no response. You figured that there wouldn’t be, so you open the door anyways.
“Hello, Mr. Shabana?” you say coyly.
When you peek into the room, you are instantly frozen by his icy gaze. He’s sitting on his bed with a book in his lap. His cold blue eyes send shivers down your spine.
“I’m um… I’m your new nurse.” you choke out. He’s feet away from you but you feel as though his hands have a tight grasp around your throat.
“My name is Y/N. Um… If you ever need anything d-don’t hesitate to call for me…”
The expression on his face is unchanging, as he remains silent.
“Well I’ll see you later tonight Mr. Shabana…”
Closing the door, breaking the line of sight that he had on you, instantly you feel a surge of relief.
You go on to visit the rest of your patients, then you come back later that night to give Mr. Shabana his dinner. A high protein meal, specifically for weight gain.
Knocking on the door a few times before you push it open, “Mr. Shabana, I have your dinner.”
He’s in the same spot where you left him, sitting on his bed with a book in his lap. But this time he doesn’t even bother to look at you when you enter the room.
Stepping closer to place the food tray on his table, you inspect his appearance. 
His clothes hang off of his frame, enveloping his skeletal body. You can make out lean muscles on his arms, but his face is sunken and his pants hang low on his hips. There are large black marks scattered across his face, and you can barely see one peeking out from below his sleeve. Were these marks from his Congenital Syphilis? Dark circles sit below his eyes, he looks as though he hasn’t slept in weeks.
He’s wearing the standard issue uniform that all patients wear. A plain t-shirt and pants, made of the same material as scrubs. Though his feet are bare, slippers sitting below the edge of the bed. His hair is long and wavy. Black as midnight, unruly in the way it hangs in front of his face. The top of his hair is half haphazardly tied up.
“Got a problem…?” He rasps, drawing out each word.
The venom of his sour tongue sends a jolt of electricity through your skin. 
“Huh?” you’ve been sitting there staring at him for too long, “O-oh! I’m sorry sir! There’s no problem, please enjoy your dinner,” you quickly rush out of the room.
As you continue on giving food to the rest of your patients, Mr. Shabana’s voice echoes through your skull.
Got a problem…? Got a problem…? Got a problem…?
A few hours later, you go back to retrieve the tray and whatever food may have not been eaten. Stopping yourself before you open the door. It’s ok. He’s just a patient. Then why does he make you so nervous?
*Knock knock*
“Hello Mr. Shabana, I’m just here to collect your tray,” you chime, masking your fear with a smile.
Walking back into the dimly lit room, the fluorescent lights flickering. His eyes staring into you.
His food has been untouched. The only thing that was eaten was a packaged cookie.
“Not hungry today?” your voice shakes as you try to ignore his harsh gaze.
He remains silent. Watching you as you step closer. The buzzing of the fluorescent bulbs filling the room, filling your brain with static.
“Was it not to your liking? I can have the cooks make something else for you if you’d like.”
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“...”
Your eyes meet. His thin eyebrows furrow, the rest of his expression remains unchanging. The pressure of his glare makes the air around you feel heavy. Pressing down on you, compressing your spine, you feel so small when he looks at you. You’re desperate to fill the cold aura with some warmth.
“Mr. Shabana you really should eat-”
*CRASH*
He slaps the tray out of your hand, food splattering onto your uniform, dripping onto the floor. 
Silence. You’re stuck staring down at your feet. Watching the pool of meat, vegetables, and milk spread around you. It takes you a few moments to fully process what has just happened, only able to snap out of it when you feel the wetness of the food seeping through your skirt, making you feel cold.
You regret looking up at him. Regret meeting his eyes. Filled with amusement.
“You better clean that up… don’t chu think…?” He smirks. Showing his sharp canines and crooked teeth.
“I-I…” you mumble, looking back down at the mess. He’s right, you should clean it up before it gets everywhere.
Going into the hallway, you grab some towels and return to his room. Not thinking your next actions through as you get down on all fours and start picking up the mess. All you want to do is hurry and clean this up so you can leave. But Mr. Shabana has different plans.
He slowly stands up. Looming over you, looking down on you with a twisted grin. He’s so tall… he makes you feel so small as you look up at him. So pathetic. So worthless.
“You look good down there…” he steps on your hand, “On your knees like a whore…”
His words leave you speechless. Your vision begins to blur and your heart starts to race. He pushes his weight further onto your hand, until you feel a crack.
“I’d like to see you like this more often…” he chuckles, the sound rumbling in his hollow chest.
Every instinct within your body is screaming at you to run. But you feel so trapped. So paralyzed by him. Like a rabbit cornered against a wall by a vicious predator. His eyes. It’s his eyes. No, it's his touch. It’s… everything about him. 
You try to speak up, but your words escape you. Coming out in a pathetic whine that makes his grin widen and his laughter intensify. 
He’s reaching for you. His hand is coming towards your face. Your mind is telling you that if you let him get any closer you will die. He will kill you. And he won’t even care.
Your body is pumped with enough adrenaline for you to break free from the physical and psychological hold he had on you.
Pulling your hand away from under his foot, you push yourself backwards. Stumbling to stand up on your feet. You run out of the room and through the halls, not risking looking back at him. All you hear as you escape is his laughter on repeat. You can’t tell if his laughter is echoing through the halls, or if it has just been ingrained into your mind.
You keep running until you get back to the nurses quarters and to your room. 
Tears running down your cheeks, food staining your clothes, and pain throbbing in your hand. You collapse on the floor and cry.
Why would he be so cruel? You understand that he’s a patient and has a list of mental illnesses, but you were trying to help him! You can’t even remember what you were doing or why you were in his room. All you remember is him and how he made you feel. His stare. His voice. His touch. 
Fuck him and fuck this job.
Clambering over to your desk, you immediately start writing your resignation letter.
You don’t get paid enough for this shit. All you wanted to do is help people, and you get repaid with this? It’s just not worth it. Through your sobs, your tears fall onto the page as you hastily move your pen on the piece of parchment in front of you.
There. It’s done. You’re done.
You won’t have to see this place, see him, ever again once you submit this letter.
Looking around your desk, searching for an envelope. You come across a thick manilla folder. The tab on the side reads, Shabana, Gyutaro.
Something compels you to open it. You already skimmed through his information, but you never looked at everything here.
His psychiatric notes? From his psychiatrist? These shouldn’t be in here… you shouldn’t have access to this confidential information.
But if you’re leaving anyways… then there’s no harm. Right?
Shabana, Gyutaro - Dr. Hantengu
August 14
Childhood trauma starting since birth
Single mother, no father
Raised as a female. Mother would dress patient as a daughter. Would cover up his deformities with makeup. (Feelings of worthlessness, not belonging)
Sister born at age 6 (turning point in patient’s life)
Mother cast aside patient for sister. (When he learned he was actually a boy. Feeling of confusion. Child cannot comprehend)
Sexual abuse started at age 10
Mother was a prostitute, would offer children to adult clients.
 Patient record, “She would bring men into our house… and let them touch us. (long pause) They wanted my sister. They wanted to do bad things to her. So I… (patient gets upset) I would offer myself to them. I would perform sexual acts for them so they would leave Ume (sister) alone.”
Sexual abuse continued until age 15
Mother died of overdose. The children were left in the home for over a week until someone found them.
Children taken to orphanage. 
Patient held in orphanage for 8 months until incident.
Brought to Asylum at age 16
End of first session 
You are left speechless. 
Reading his records reminds you of why you wanted to be a nurse in the first place. To help people that have gone through trauma such as this. He didn’t lash out at you because of something you did. It’s not your fault. And it isn’t his either. He just needs help. 
And you will be the one to help him.
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732 notes · View notes
actuallysaiyan · 7 months
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I Wanna Be Adored(Nanami Kento x Fem!Reader)
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warnings: MAJOR SPOILERS!! PROCEED WITH CAUTION, a fix-it fic, mentions of major character death, fluff, angst, mentions of violence/dark themes, lots of sadness, happy ending, flashback scenes are in italics, canon divergent/AU word count: 1.8k pairings: Kento Nanami x Fem!Reader a/n: I haven't watched the newest episode of JJK, but I remember the feeling I had when I read that chapter in the manga. Here's for all the ones who hate the canon story in the manga!
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The night felt colder than it should have. He knows he shouldn’t have ever let you go off on your own, but everything was just absolute chaos that night. He remembers being with Megumi and Ino and then trying to make a point of getting back to you. Kento wasn’t going to let this night end in disaster when it came to you. You were his shining light, his reason to live. If he’s got to maim or kill to get back to you, he will. He absolutely would do anything to make sure no harm came to you.
The problem was how good of a sorcerer you are. Not that he didn’t believe you couldn’t take care of yourself, but he knows you enjoy throwing yourself into battle so much. He’s seen you with that same smirk Gojo usually sports. The two of you aren’t too far off in terms of personality. The same things that irk him about Gojo, they are so endearing in you. You shine so beautifully. You show him things he’s so long forgotten.
That’s why it was so important to him to find you. Despite the chaos and the destruction, Nanami was going to find you and hold you close. He’d fully confess his feelings to you, though you were already sure you knew he wanted to settle down with you and start a family. But Namami wasn’t going to let this chance pass him by. He curses himself for being so silly for waiting so long to finally spill the beans to you. Still, he knows you won’t judge him.
An uncontrollable rage filled Kento as he found the body of Ijichi lying on the ground. Though he initially believes the man to be dead, Kento is relieved to know that he’s going to be able to help him. The sudden realization of just how intense all of this is hits Kento and he’s suddenly so scared to find you in such a way. He’s scared that you might have gotten a little too cocky with everything and that you jumped head first in a battle that might have been too much for you.
After finding Nobara and Nitta, Kento vows that the next thing he’s going to do is to find you. He won’t do anything stupid or rash. Even after wasting Shigemo, Kento knows he needs to find you. His heart races with every step he takes. His anger is almost overtaking him as he begins to imagine the worst of the worst.
If he found your body on the ground, broken and bruised and bleeding, he’s so sure he’d lose his mind. You are utterly the only thing that matters in his entire life. He needs you more than you’ll ever know. You really mean that much to him, Before you, Kento was a shell of a man. You brought light into his heart and it has never gone out.
Things become even more dire as he meets up with Maki and Naobito Zenin. Not being able to find you makes Kento more nervous. The curses that come next seem to be relentless and he finds himself in the middle of a serious attack. The pain is incredible, but the pain of not being able to see you before he loses his life is even worse. Kento knows this is more than likely the end for himself.
Meanwhile, you’re out of your mind trying to find your lover. You knew you shouldn’t have run off either, but the call of a good fight to protect the people you love is what fueled you to keep going. You were going to fight until your last breath if that’s what it took to protect everyone and keep the world safe. Even after finding out that Satoru was sealed, you still took it upon yourself to take the lead in many of these fights.
You tend to the wounded when you can, but you still can’t stop thinking about Kento. You worry dearly for the love of your life. You look for him everywhere you can, but you’re always stopped by something or someone else. When you aren’t actively defeating curses, you’re on the move to the next battle. And when you’re not battling or moving to another part of the area, you’re helping the wounded or you’re caring for those who are about to perish.
Your heart clenches when you begin to imagine the worst. You think about finding your lover on the ground, broken and cracked like he’s nothing. Discarded pile of flesh and bones for you to discover in horror. It terrifies you to think that you may never get to kiss him again. You may never get to hold him. Never get to see that gorgeous smile of his again. It’s killing you inside to be apart from Kento. He’s always been your rock, your knight in shining armor. Everything about him is perfect in your eyes.
You hold out hope that you’ll be reunited with your lover soon. You’ll do anything to make sure you see him again. This night will be a very old memory one day, one you two will think was crazy and you’ll reminisce about how much you’ve gone through this night.
After the fight with Dagon, Kento wonders truly if this is the end of the road for him. He thinks of your beautiful face, that shining smile. It’s enough to keep him going, but he’s more than ready to let this all end. He knows you’ll be distraught, but you’re strong enough to get through it all without him. It’ll take some time, but you’ll fight through the pain of losing him. With a good support team and some therapy, Kento knows that you’ll make it through this. Once he emerges from the domain, he’s met with the evil curse Jogo. The pain is searing through his body as he is almost completely incinerated. He lays on the ground, writhing in pain. Even if he lives through this, you probably won’t even be able to look at him the same way. Not with his damaged eye and his scars. You’ll probably want to leave him and live a much better life than to have to take care of such a scarred man.
The later it gets, the more terrified you get. You know that you’re probably going to lose the love of your life in this battle. He won’t be returning to you. You’ll find him just as you pictured before, lying in a heap of his own blood and bones. The lifeless body of your lover will be the thing that renders you completely insane. How will you even live on without him? You try to remain calm, but you’re so damn scared. You’re fucking losing it.
You set off on your own, in search of the man who has shown you just how beautiful life is. You go looking for him, knowing this might be your last hope. Maybe you’re both strong enough to get through this. Your eyes are scanning your surroundings as you call out his name. Your heart is wrenching in your chest as you begin to find yourself losing hope. You’re about to turn around and search elsewhere when you spot him. You gasp in shock as you see him.
That voice…
It belongs to the curse Mahito. You shudder as you watch him taunt your lover. You feel like you’re running too slow to reach Kento. You shout his name, and Mahito mocks you as well. He’s yelling Kento’s name in the same desperate tone you are, angering your lover even more. Kento turns to look at you and you get to see just how badly he was hurt. You feel your heart breaking. Your beautiful lover has been so disfigured and all you want to do is reach him and hold him close. Before you can even do anything, you watch in horror as Mahito gleefully sets his sights on your lover.
“Nanamin?” Yuji’s gentle voice can be heard, and Kento turns towards his student. There’s a small smile on his face.
“You’ve got it from here,” Kento tells Yuji, then he turns to you and smiles brightly.
A loud scream escapes you as you watch your lover be killed right in front of you. You collapse on your knees as Yuji becomes enraged. The last thing Kento remembers is the sound of your voice…
“Daddy?” a soft voice is heard from the doorway. Kento opens his good eye, peeking over at the blonde little girl standing there.
Kento stretches lightly, then he sits up on the bed. He’s pretty sure he was dreaming of that dreadful night again. Kento is still not sure how he managed to escape that last attack from Mahito, but he is very glad he did. Kento smiles as he sees his daughter pitter-pattering her way into the room.
“Were you sleepin’, daddy?” she asks as she hops onto the bed. Even though his wounds have healed over the years, she is still very careful not to hurt him on his sensitive side.
“Yeah, I guess I was.” Kento says with a chuckle, pulling his little girl closer to him. She nuzzles her face into his chest, sighing happily as she gets a whiff of her father’s comforting scent. These days, he smells like old books and cozy blankets.
There’s a knock on the bedroom door and Kento’s heart swells with affection when he sees you with a tray of food. You’ve got that same playful smirk spread on your face like you always did, but motherhood has tamed you a little. You set the tray down on the bedside table and you join your two loved ones on the bed.
“Were you having that dream again?” You ask Kento, seeing the dazed look in his good eye. He keeps the other one covered with an eyepatch most times.
Kento sighs and he nods, “Yeah…that was some night, huh?”
Your daughter presses a soft kiss on her father’s cheek, clinging to him by wrapping her arms around his neck. He kisses the top of her head, then he ruffles her blonde curls. He can’t believe just how fortunate he is to have both of you. After that dreadful night, Kento retired and you two moved somewhere calm and relaxing. He got the chance to read all those books he thought he’d never get the chance. And of course, he started a family with you quite quickly.
“I’m so glad I didn’t lose you that night,” you murmur as you lean against him.
Kento laughs, “Me too, sweetheart.”
And for a moment, the three of you cuddle on the bed, enjoying the sensations of being so close to one another. Nothing will ever tear your little family apart…
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Text
Listen to your heart
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PAIRING || Boyfriend!Dad!Young!Tony Stark x Girlfriend!Mom!Fem!Reader
WORDCOUNT || 6.3K
SUMMARY || You gave birth to your beautiful set of twins nearly two months ago, and it has been very difficult to keep your hands off one another. Though you're still afraid of being fully intimate with your boyfriend again, Tony is an amazing gentleman who will show you there is no need to worry about anything as he makes your first time one you will truly never forget.
RATING || Explicit (E)
TAGS || No powers AU. Young!Tony Stark AU. Kid fic. Established relationship.
WARNINGS || Reader is described as having tattoos. Use of nicknames (Sunshine, Love/My Love, Munchkins, Carissima). Insecure!Reader. Breastfeeding. Light angst if you squint.
SMUT || D/S undertones. Switch!Tony Stark. Lactation kink. Drinking of breastmilk (sexual). Mommy kink. Dirty talk. Praise. Begging. Edging. Hair pulling. Oral (F+M receiving). Fingering. Handjob. Deepthroating. Facial/cumming on the face. Cum swap. Thigh fucking. First time after childbirth. Unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it!). Squirting. Cumming untouched. Multiple orgasms. Aftercare.
A/N || This idea has been sitting in my drafts for months now, but I am glad @ccbsrmsf1 gave me the last push I needed to finally finish it! Thank you for everything, from supporting me while writing and proofreading after it's finished, I owe this fic to you. Because of this, I want to dedicate this fic to you, dear Carol. I love you 3000, bestie! 💙
A/N 2.0 || I have incorporated writing prompt #1086 by @creativepromptsforwriting in this story, which I think is a perfect fit for this story and the love these two share. They have a huge part of my heart, and I love these two to pieces. 💙
EVENTS Masterlist || @fandom-free-bingo Wild || Free space +'Lyrics of her favorite song tattooed on her arm' Masterlist || @mcukinkbingo || Setting: a hotel room Masterlist || @multifandom-flash Compliments || I have just one thing to say
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GIF: @ccbsrmsf1 || All graphics are made by @nicoline1998enilocin
Main Masterlist || Tony Stark Masterlist || AU Masterlist
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It's been nearly two months since you gave birth to your beautiful twins, your daughter Orion and your son Hudson. It is like a whole new world opened up for you both when they were finally safe in your arms, and ever since then, you have been living on cloud nine with them in your lives.
But there's one downside to the fact that you've given birth, and that is that you and Tony cannot be fully intimate with each other yet, which is mainly a struggle for Tony. He loves to be buried deep inside you as he pulls every whimper and moans from your body. You know he's missing it, and so are you, but you're not ready for it and unsure how to bring it up.
You're seated on Tony's bed as you're trying to read a book, but you haven't turned a page in almost fifteen minutes, instead being zoned out for most of that time. He just walked out of the shower attached to his bedroom, water droplets dripping from his hair onto his broad shoulders before running down his muscled torso and back.
Usually, you would have been all over him by now, but not today, and it's not sitting right with Tony.
"Is everything okay, Sunshine? You seem a bit out of it tonight," he asks as he comes to sit down on the edge of the bed. He places his hand on your thigh before rubbing it softly with his thumb.
"Y-yeah. I'm sorry, I zoned out for a moment," you tell him with a small smile, but it didn't reach your eyes.
"Is there something on your mind you would like to talk about?" he tries again, and you sigh before putting your book off to the side. Talking about it might make you feel better, so you decide to give it a shot.
"I'm scared to have sex again," you sigh as you close your eyes, embarrassed even to say it out loud, and as soon as the words leave your lips, you're starting to regret it - he probably thinks it's stupid of you even to have brought it up, to begin with.
"Why's that?" he asks softly, his brows furrowed as he looks at you.
"I-" is all you say before huffing out a sigh.
"I don't like the way I look ever since I gave birth, and I'm afraid of you seeing me the same way I see myself. I don't look anything like I did before I got pregnant, and now-" is all you can say before Tony grabs your hand to stop your ramblings for a moment.
"Can I say something, Sunshine?" he asks soothingly, and you nod.
"First of all, you're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, and there's not a single thing that can change that. I mean, you carried our babies for nine months, and then you brought them into this world! You did that! I'm so proud of you, Sunshine, and like I said, you're even more beautiful to me now than ever before," he says enthusiastically, the love dripping from his voice.
He pulls you from your spot against the headboard to sit on his lap, and your gazes meet as he looks at you fondly.
"But most of all, you're the mother of my children, and there's nothing more beautiful than that. Seeing you be a Mom has made my heart feel so full of love and adoration for you. I love being a Dad, but I love seeing you being a natural Mom so much more," he says softly as he tucks a piece of hair behind your ear.
"But I also want you to know I will wait as long as you need me to. And even if you're never ready again, that's also okay with me. Knowing I have you and our twins by my side is all I could ever wish for, Sunshine. I love you so much, and I always love you without a shadow of a doubt," he whispers before leaning in and capturing your lips with his, the tears gathering in the corners of your eyes now spilling over.
When you pull away, he brushes them from your cheeks with his thumbs, and a smile appears on your lips.
"What do you think of renting a hotel room for a night once you're ready? Somewhere with a phenomenal view, where we have all the privacy and alone time we could ever wish to experience our first time all over again?" he offers, and you nod immediately.
"It's a perfect idea, My Love, but now I want you to get comfortable on the bed. I want to thank you for everything you do for me," you say before cupping his cheeks and placing a soft peck on his lips. You get up to allow Tony to get comfortable, but not before removing the towel he was still wearing. You're not left disappointed at the sight.
His cock is already at half-hardness as he lies back, and it looks impressive. Not just in length but also in girth. The veins running along it have you drooling, and the way his tip is flushed a perfect red color has you clenching your thighs as well. He has an absolute monster of a cock, and you can't wait to get your hands and mouth on it again.
Before he gets a chance to say anything, you grab his cock, your fingers barely touching as they're wrapped around his girth. Your tongue licks along the light blue vein on the bottom of his length before you take his sensitive tip in your mouth to softly suckle on it. The taste of pre-cum coats your mouth, making you moan softly.
"F-fuck!" he groans out as your hand slowly works him up and down his entire length, and you hum in approval. His hips buck up in your hand when you squeeze him just the way he likes, and a strained moan escapes his throat, too. He's trying his hardest not to cum already, but it's tough as he looks at you, and you look back up at him with your big doe eyes.
"So beautiful," he whispers as his gaze meets yours, his knuckles gliding over the edge of your jaw as his lips curl into an appreciative smile. Meanwhile, you take more of him into your mouth, driving him to the edge of his orgasm once more.
His hips buck up into your mouth and throat as you slowly work more into your mouth, swallowing him down until he's not able to think straight for a little while, just like he wants it. It's not until your nose makes contact with his pelvic bone that a high-pitched whine leaves his throat, and you quickly pull off, afraid you've accidentally hurt him.
"Oh god, please keep going, 'm so close, Sunshine, fuck! 'M so-" is all he can say before you take him into your mouth again, suckling on his tip while your hand keeps working him at a steady pace, and his hips rut up as he's looking for more, needing just a little extra to be pushed over the edge.
Suddenly, everything goes very fast for Tony as your mouth pulls away, but your hand keeps working him while the other one softly tugs on his balls, which are so heavy and full of his cum. Your tongue is stretched out as his orgasm washes over you, most of it landing on your tongue, some ending up on your face as well.
"Good boy," you whisper before you crawl over his body, immediately pulling him into a kiss without swallowing his white gold, instead licking into his mouth to allow him a taste as well. He groans into the kiss as he tastes the salty and tangy flavor of his cum, but he's more than happy to swallow it down, too, together with you.
Once you're both fully satisfied and cleaned up, you get comfortable on top of your boyfriend, your bodies fitting together like puzzle pieces. His fingers gently trace circles over your back as your face is nuzzled into his neck, and your breathing patterns slowly sync up as you both enjoy this moment.
That night, you and Tony sleep like rocks, and you're feeling very grateful to finally have told him what's been on your mind for a little while now. Even though you're not ready yet, you know it's the first step to being intimate with your boyfriend again, precisely in the way you're both craving so much.
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It's been a few days since you talked with Tony about not being ready yet, and you can tell there has been a positive shift between you two. He's giving you even more love and attention than usual and is extra mindful of you.
Right now, you're standing in the kitchen preparing two bottles for your twins and talking to Maria about them when Tony walks in with a massive smile and a surprise behind his back. The last time he looked this giddy with excitement, he bought the cutest outfits for the twins, so you're curious about what he's hiding now.
"Hi, Sunshine," Tony says as he softly kisses your cheek, making you smile widely.
"Hi, My Love. What're you hiding from me?" you ask with narrowed eyes and a smile, and your boyfriend can't stop smiling from pure excitement.
"I wanted to surprise you with something beautiful, so I picked up a gorgeous bouquet of sunflowers for you!" he says as he shows the large bouquet of bright yellow sunflowers. The butterflies in your stomach go wild as you feel very loved right now, and you can't stop smiling.
"Oh my god, they're beautiful! Thank you so much!" you say before taking them from him and pulling him into a big hug. His large frame enveloped you as he nuzzled his face into your neck, warmth radiating off his cheeks as you two stood there. Maria smiled at both of you while finishing the bottles for you.
"I love you so much, my beautiful Sunshine," Tony whispers after pulling away, his hands cupping your cheeks before placing a soft kiss on your lips that immediately leaves you wanting more. Your lips follow his when he moves away, and he gladly gives you a few more pecks before getting a vase ready for your sunflowers.
As soon as Tony turns around, your gaze crosses Maria's, and she immediately notices something's off. It's not enough to bring up immediately, but she notices it nevertheless. You give her a reassuring smile, which he reciprocates, and before you can say anything, Tony's already turned around with a vase.
"Alright, will this one be big enough?" he asks as he holds it out, and your attention is pulled back to him.
"I think so. Why don't we find out?" you ask before getting the vase and turning around. You're getting ready to put the flowers in when you suddenly feel a pair of large, muscular arms surrounding you and pulling you back. You close your eyes as you smile at the touch, your hand finding its place on top of Tony's as he hugs you.
"I love you, Tony," you say, slowly swaying back and forth. Your eyes are closed as you enjoy your boyfriend's closeness, and you don't notice Maria walking out of the kitchen with the bottles, ready to feed your babies.
Eventually, Tony lets you go to put the flowers in the vase with his help, and not long after, they have found their way to Howard and Maria's kitchen island, brightening up the room with their presence. As you head to the living room, you grab Tony's hand, who happily interlaces his fingers with yours before walking in.
What you see as you walk in has your heart melting. Howard and Maria are feeding your twins while they look at your son and daughter with an adoration that cannot be put into words. They're their entire world, and you pull Tony close to you at the sight of it.
"How're the little Munchkins doing? Are they hungry today?" you ask as you sit next to Maria, who is giving Orion her bottle. Orion looks at you as you sit down, and your heart melts even more as you think about the fact that you have put her and her brother into this world. Together with Tony, they are your entire world.
"They're doing amazing; both are drinking their bottles like two hungry babies, so I have a feeling they'll be having a very good nap after their feeding," Howard says as he keeps smiling down at Hudson. They're wearing matching onesies, making them look even more adorable.
You softly brush your fingers over Orion's cheek as you smile at her, and your heart feels very full as you look into your daughter's eyes. Your beautiful daughter, who - together with her brother - is the result of the love you and Tony share. It's bigger than you've ever felt before, making you feel complete in a way you cannot describe.
You don't know that Tony is looking at you with the same love while you gush over your daughter, and you, together with your children, make his world complete. Everything revolves around the three of you for him; as long as he has that, he's the richest man on earth.
Just when the twins are done and ready for a change, Maria pulls you aside for a moment as she burps Orion - Howard has already burped Hudson. He gives him a diaper change before his nap while Tony cleans the bottles and makes a snack for himself and you.
"Do you want to go somewhere for lunch tomorrow? I can tell something's on your mind, and I think you could use some one-on-one time without Tony or the kids," she offers, and with those words, it feels like a huge weight is lifted off your shoulders.
"I would love to," you say softly, and Maria nods in acknowledgment. Now that sleep threatens to take over, Orion gets a little fussy. It doesn't take long for the twins and their grandparents to be asleep in their bedroom, as they also decide to nap.
You and Tony have decided to make the most out of the situation for now. He has pulled you into his bedroom, and you're sitting comfortably on his lap, your hands around his neck, and Tony's hands lying on your hips.
He has pulled you into a deep kiss, his tongue gliding against yours in a leisurely pace between nibbling on each other's bottom lips or peppering kisses over each other's jaws and necks, careful not to leave marks that will be visible.
"Hmm, I know you told me three times, but can you say it one more time, please?" you ask Tony with half-lidded eyes and a dopey smile.
"I will say it to you as often as you need to hear it, Sunshine. I love you," Tony tells you, and an excited giggle leaves your lips before you pull him into another kiss. You two haven't been together for that long yet - your second anniversary hasn't even taken place yet - but the love is dripping off both of you.
"I love you too, Tony. Thank you for saving me," you whisper against his lips. Even though you don't think anything of it now, Tony will be thinking about it for a long time. However, right now, he's too busy with you, your soft, sweet mouth, and your beautiful body to care about anything else. That will have to wait for another day.
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Maria has invited you to lunch with her and taken you to a beautiful diner where you would never expect to find her. Yet, she looks like she belongs there, and that's because she has been visiting there for years now.
As soon as you arrived—she was there before you because you were running a few errands before meeting Maria—she immediately started telling you some of her fondest memories of the place, and you could not get enough of listening to her talk. Maybe it's the faint Italian accent that still seems to linger or the softness of her voice, but something has you hooked on every word she says.
"Howard and I used to go on dates here all the time, especially at the beginning of our relationship. He used to help me with homework, and he taught me most of the English I know today as well," she says with a fond smile, and that's when a waitress comes over.
"Good afternoon, welcome to our diner! My name is Sophia, and I will be your server today," the woman says in a cheery voice, instantly lifting your mood.
"What can I get you two as a starter today? Coffee, tea, or a menu?" she asks. You both order a cup of tea and ask for a menu to see what they have on offer this time around.
"I'll be right back with them," she says before turning around and heading behind the counter. It's a relatively slow afternoon in the diner, which you appreciate, especially seeing what you want to discuss with Maria today.
"What else have you two done here, if I may ask?" you ask, curious to learn more about Howard and Maria and what they were like in their younger years.
"Hmmm... we shared our first kiss right outside this very diner. It was already after closing, and we stayed until the last moment we could. We had been holding hands the entire evening, and when we left, Howard pulled me close, placed his hand on my cheek, and kissed me. It was lovely, and I still can't believe he did that sometimes," Maria says with a blush on her cheeks, making her look adorable.
"And yeah, ever since then, we try to come here at least once a month to relive old times, and we always like to sit in the same booth as we used to. It's like nothing changed in all those years, and to this day, it feels like I'm falling with my husband all over again when he takes me here," Maria says with a broad smile.
You know the feeling all too well, as that is how Tony makes you feel. It must run in the family to have the Stark men be gentlemen.
"You know, Tony makes me feel like that, too. He already did before Hudson and Orion were born, but it only multiplied once he learned I was pregnant. He's so caring and sweet-" is all you can say before Sophia returns with your tea and takes your lunch orders. Both of you opt to go for an omelet with extra veggies, which sounds delicious to you, and that's when you can finally finish your story.
"As I was saying, Tony is so caring and sweet. Mindful, too. And that's also what's bothering me, I guess," you say as you stare at your tea, the leaves inside swirling around as your spoon spins in circles.
Maria doesn't say anything. Instead, she grabs your hand, squeezing in a comforting way, letting you know she's listening.
"How long did it take for you to be intimate with Howard after you had Tony?" you ask her, and if she was caught off guard by the question, she didn't show it.
"Do you mean how long it took for me to be ready to have sex with my husband again after giving birth?" she asks you, and you nod as you meet her gaze. You momentarily felt embarrassed, but you know it's unnecessary. She didn't judge you when she caught the two of you having sex early on in your relationship, and she's not judging you now.
"It took me longer than I thought it would if I'm being fully honest. Of course, it's different for everyone, but it took almost four months for me. It's a good thing Howard is a patient man, and I know Tony is a patient man as well," she tells you, and you believe her.
"Your situation is very different from mine, though, and there is no time limit on when you should have sex again after giving birth. Some women do it almost as soon as they can walk, and others take months, maybe even years, to build up to it again, and it's all okay. You don't need to feel rushed or like you must do it now; you can take it at your own pace. That's what is best for you both, Carissima," Maria finishes, and you're left momentarily speechless.
You reach out for her hands as you look at her, unsure what to say now, but that's okay. Neither of you feels the need to fill the silence, and the moment feels right.
"Grazie, Mami," you whisper, and Maria's face lights up at you speaking Italian. In all fairness, you haven't learned much yet, but you've been working on it to surprise both her and Tony. Maria's reaction is totally worth it, as she's practically glowing, and if you weren't already her favorite, you definitely are now.
After that, the conversation becomes much lighter as you start talking about your twins again when your food arrives. When you leave the diner, you're feeling a lot better, and this conversation with Maria has done you a lot more good than you thought it would. Now, all that's left to do is discuss it with Tony again before moving on to the next step, which you're looking forward to now.
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Almost a month has passed since your conversations with Tony and Maria about not being ready yet, but last night, you had an entirely different one with your boyfriend. This led you to the restaurant you're currently sitting in. He is taking you out to a lovely dinner before taking you to a hotel room, where he is planning on pulling you apart in every way imaginable.
"Can I talk to you for a moment, My Love?" you ask as Tony is seated on the bed reading a book, and you walk out of the shower. Your hair is still dripping from the hot water, and your tattoos are on display since you're wearing only a towel around your body.
"You? Always," he says, the corners of his mouth curling into a sweet smile as he takes in your almost bare form.
"Thank you for being patient with me the past few months, as I know it hasn't been easy on you. But I also want to let you know your patience will be rewarded if you have me. I would love to take you up on booking a hotel room and spending an entire uninterrupted night together so we can make nothing but sweet love for hours on end," you say as you sit on the edge of the bed.
"A-are you sure, Sunshine? We don't have to rush-" "I'm sure, Tony. I want to have sex with you again," you say before pulling him close and giving him a promising kiss, your tongues sliding together to convince him of every last promise you can make.
"Okay, I'll make a reservation right now," he says as he pulls away, a deep blush on his cheeks as he gives you a love-filled look. Not even 10 minutes later, you're cuddled up in your boyfriend's arms while wearing his shirt, and that night is the best night's sleep you have had since the birth of your twins.
"Are you in the mood for dessert today, or do you want to be my dessert tonight?" Tony asks after you've both finished your main courses. You look at Tony with a shocked expression, but he's completely serious. He raises his brow in question, and you shake your head as a chuckle falls from your lips.
"I think you know the answer to that all too well, My Love," you say, and before you know it, you're on the bed in your hotel room as you're completely bare, while Tony is massaging your back while straddling you. He's completely naked too, and his cock is carefully wedged between your thighs. 
"God, I've missed you so much, Sunshine," Tony groans as he slowly works his hands over your back and shoulders, loosening every last knot while he ruts his hips with each movement, his cock being stimulated with every drag of his body.
"Feels so good, fuck!" he hisses as you clench around him, bringing him to the edge before letting go again. Moans tumble from his lips as he keeps working his length between your thighs, and he knows that if this already feels so good, he won't last long when he's buried inside you.
The warmth of your thighs combined with the soft moans as he nudges your clit occasionally have his head reeling, and he wants nothing more than to feel you around him again, but he also knows he has to be patient for that. He wants to do it right for your first time.
"S-Sunshine, 'm so close, fucking fuck! God, 'm so close too; please let me cum, 'm so fucking close," Tony begs as his moans and thrusts get sloppy.
"Cum for me, Puppy, cum for Mommy like a good boy," you tell him, and with those words, he pulls out from between your thighs before spreading them to expose your glistening pussy, and he works his cock over with his hand before he shoots every last drop of his cum over your soaked folds with a loud moan of your name.
Before you know it, you're flipped around with ease, and Tony is lying between your thighs as he licks every last drop of his cum from your pussy. The taste of it, combined with your arousal, has him going wild, groaning against your pussy as he buries his tongue inside.
Your hands have found their home in his hair as you pull him closer to you, his fingers digging into the plush flesh of your thighs as his tongue works over your clit as well as being buried deep inside your pussy, licking up every last drop of your arousal in the process.
As Tony keeps working his tongue in the best way possible, you rut your hips up against his face, chasing your high that is quickly building. All you can do at this point is moan uncontrollably, as not a single coherent sentence is coming out of your mouth as Tony goes wild between your legs.
It's not until Tony adds two of his fingers to your pleasure that you're almost falling over the edge, and you need one more little push to fall over. And he's more than happy to give it to you.
His lips attach to your clit as he sucks it with vigor, his fingers plunging in and out of you at a relentless pace that makes the filthiest of squelching noises. Before you know it, you're seeing stars at the edges of your vision, and you're squirting all over Tony's face and the bed with a scream of his name, his hair being pulled hard as he works you through the height of your orgasm.
You're a panting, boneless mess once you finally let go of your boyfriend's hair, but he doesn't mind in the slightest - he came at the same time as you when you squirted for him.
"Good girl, you're doing so well for me, Sunshine," Tony praises you as he rubs your thighs until they stop trembling from the intensity of what you've just gone through. He peppers soft kisses all over your stomach as he makes his way up, but before he reaches your face, he makes one stop: your breasts.
You only breastfed the twins once today, and you didn't pump at all. Instead, you opted to leave it for Tony so he could satisfy his need to drink from you as well. With a soft groan, he latches onto your nipples, and within no time, he can taste the first squirts of your milk on his tongue.
"That's it, drink all of Mommy's milk," you whisper while you're coming down from your high, and all Tony can do is moan softly while rutting his hips against the mattress, despite being so sensitive after cumming twice like that.
While Tony drinks your precious milk, you let your fingers glide through his hair, and you both feel very content in the moment. The satisfying feeling of your boyfriend drinking, combined with the orgasm he just pulled from you, has you dozing off in no time, and Tony decides just to let you nap for now; you're going to need your strength for later.
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It takes you a while to wake up from your nap, but as soon as you do, you feel Tony pulling you against his chest. His long fingers are softly tracing over the lyrics of your favorite song tattooed on your arm, making you giggle at the ticklish feeling.
"Welcome back, Sunshine. How're you feeling?" he asks between soft kisses on your shoulder and neck. A smile dances on your lips as you revel in the soft touches, and you open your eyes before turning your head, allowing him to place a few kisses on your cheek, too.
"'M feeling good, My Love. Thank you," you tell Tony before a yawn escapes, and he chuckles. 
"You're cute when you yawn, you know that?" Tony asks playfully, and you can't help but smile as you turn around, now fully facing your boyfriend.
"That might be true, but nothing is cuter than when our Munchkins yawn, to be honest. The newborn scrunch and the yawns melt my heart every time, and I cannot get enough of it. I wish they could forever stay as small as they are now," you sigh as you think about your twins.
"You're right. I'm still so fortunate to have had the honor of becoming a Dad with you by my side, Sunshine. I never thought it would happen, but somehow, with you, it feels right. Like we're right where we are supposed to be, and exactly with the person we're meant to be with," Tony tells you as his fingers glide over your arm and side before finding this place on your hip.
"And maybe one day we can have another one. Or two. Or five. I'm not picky about the amount," he says, and you laugh at his comment. Your heart feels like it's about to explode from pure love, and you cannot thank your boyfriend enough.
"I would love to have one, two, or five more kids with you, Tony. As long as I have you by my side, I know nothing can happen to me - to us. You're the love of my life, and I am grateful to have a family with you," you tell him as a smile tugs on the corners of your lips.
You lean forward to place your lips on your boyfriend's, and he slots his lips together with yours perfectly. The kiss is soft and slow, as you two have all the time in the world tonight. There are no crying babies to wake up to in the middle of the night, no feeding schedule in the middle of the night - just you and Tony in your little bubble.
Eventually, Tony pulls back just enough to roll you onto your back and position himself over your body, your face on the same level as he looks at you with nothing but love. He tucks a piece of hair behind your ear before leaning down and capturing your kiss in a bit more of a heated kiss this time, leaving you breathless.
"Tony, please," you beg softly as your hands glide over his biceps, and he smirks at you before shifting his weight and grabbing his now fully hard cock again. He pumps it up and down a few times before spreading your thighs a little further, making sure there's enough room for him between them as he lines up with your entrance.
"Are you sure you're ready, Sunshine? We can stop at any time if you're not okay with it," he says, but you nod. You're more than okay with it and want to be intimate with your boyfriend again. You want to have sex with your boyfriend again.
"Take a deep breath for me, Sunshine," Tony whispers against your lips before kissing you softly, and you chase his lips as he pulls away with a smirk. As you take a deep breath, Tony slowly pushes in, and it's like coming home for him.
It's like having been on vacation for months and finally coming home to the one place he missed the most. He has always loved to be buried inside you, but now it feels like absolute heaven to him. With slow thrusts, he works his cock into your soft, velvet walls that suck him in deeper with every movement.
"T-Tony," you moan once he bottoms out, and he has to clench the sheets in order not to cum right away. Now that he's finally where he belongs, he doesn't want to ruin it by shooting his load right away, though he knows he won't last long. With every drag of his cock in and out of your body, your moans start to mingle, and your breaths become ragged as you both are quickly climbing to your highs.
"You feel so good around me, Sunshine. I missed your sweet, soft, warm pussy so much. Been dreaming about her wrapped around my cock, been cumming untouched so many times, and it has been worth it every single time," he tells you between thrusts and with a panting breath. His words only spur you on further as your orgasm is building, and you're on the edge of release.
"Cum with me, Tony, 'm so fucking close," you ask him, and he just nods before picking up the pace. Your foreheads are connected as a thin layer of sweat adorns your bodies, and you pull Tony in for a last, deep kiss as you officially fall over the edge together.
Your walls are clenching and milking his cock as he spills his cum inside you with a moan that you swallow right away. You're both trembling from the intensity of the orgasms after months of not having sex like this, but you're glad to finally get back into the routine of it. You missed it - but most of all, you missed Tony.
"I have just one thing to say, My Love. It's good to be back," you say before bursting out in laughter. Tony agrees before falling into a laughing fit, closely followed by you. For the next fifteen to twenty minutes, both you and Tony are unable to catch your breaths because as soon as you look at one another, you burst out in laughter once again.
Once you two are finally able to look at each other without bursting into laughter, Tony gets up to draw you both a bath, and he makes it extra special with a few candles and your favorite bath bomb, combined with a bottle of your favorite non-alcoholic sparkling wine and two glasses.
"Ready for your bath, m'lady?" he asks as he stands by the foot of the bed, his hand stretched out to guide you to the large tub. You happily let him show you the way before he helps you get in and pulls you close. He pours both of you a glass of sparkling wine, and you both toast to a perfect night together.
"Thank you for doing this, Tony. I love you so much, and I can't wait to see what the rest of our lives together will be like," you tell him before kissing him softly and then bringing the glass to your lips. The liquid is cold but smooth as it goes down your throat, and you hum appreciatively.
"I love you too, Sunshine," he says, and the rest of the night is spent either in the bath cuddling and feeding each other pieces of fruit and chocolate or wrapped up in bed as you're both overlooking the New York City skyline.
However, when the following day arrives, you're more than happy to head home and see your twins, Howard and Maria. As much as you enjoyed the night to yourselves, you can also feel yourself craving some attention from your beautiful babies.
"Ready?" you ask Tony, and he nods. You swing open the door to the living room, and both Howard and Maria are giving the twins a bottle. Hudson drinks from his light blue bottle, and Orion drinks from her light pink bottle. Their outfits match their bottles.
They're dressed in matching outfits again, making them look adorable. But the cherry on top? Seeing Howard and Maria falling in love with them just a little more with each passing moment. They are the best grandparents your twins could ask for, and this moment shows just that.
Tony pulls you into his side as you stand in the doorframe to look at them, not wanting to interrupt their little bonding moment. Seeing your in-laws fall in love with your babies is something you never imagined, but now that you see it, you never want it to be any other way.
And once you're holding your first grandbaby, you know you will look at them the same way they are looking at Hudson and Orion.
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