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veilkeeper · 6 months

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thoughts on the astarion-halsin polymance

i know some people dont like the halsin polymance specifically if the PC's other partner is astarion but. i want to talk about it. because i think maybe a lot of people have come to conclusions without seeing the scenes in question for themselves. so let me give a different perspective.

disclaimers: *i know a lot of people ship/hc this polymance as a triad, but for the purposes of this post i'm talking specifically about the "hinge" dynamic we see in-game thx. **also i got the halsin romance trigger before completing astarion's personal quest, so this post is talking about that perspective, and all quotes are from those conversations. ***i respect people who dont play this route. you're allowed to play this game however you want. the purpose of this post is to discuss the canon, in-game text and how it supports the astarion-halsin polymance as a viable and healthy path for these relationships, with nuance and respect to astarion's personal issues. this is not meant to convert anyone, but it is meant to clarify and provide additional context that i feel is largely missing from a lot of discussions about how the polymance is "bad", unilaterally.

let's start with halsin, because i think he's the easier perspective to tease out here, given that he really leaves nothing to the imagination. he's incredibly earnest and open, and will happily describe his perspective on non-monogamy right out the gate. as he says...

The wolf mates for life, but the bear roams free and partners as its instinct dictates. I need to stay true to my nature, and you to yours.

now, to get ahead of potential backlash here... if you haven't spent a lot of time with halsin, particularly if you've never flirted with him, that line may imply that he's a "player". he is not. given the context of the PCs interactions with him up to this point (and how he treats the relationship after, if you confirm the romance), halsin is deeply devoted, and has really strong feelings for the PC. it's really sweet, i highly recommend romancing him, either as a polymance or solo.

what he's describing here is a perspective of cultural non-monogamy. that he believes his feelings are not diminished by having multiple relationships at the same time, and he expects that if the PC agrees to a relationship with him that they will respect his freedom to pursue others when/if such feelings arise, just as he will respect the PC's freedom to continue and/or pursue other relationships as well. it's a really succinct and frankly unexpectedly respectful negotiation of the terms of a polyam relationship.

and that respect is evident from the get go. if you've never seen this conversation, it basically opens with him saying "hey, i have these feelings about you, i was wondering if you maybe felt the same," and if the PC says that they do, he immediately acknowledges the existing relationship and tells the PC that they can't move forward without consent. and you cant; speaking to halsin again just has him ask the PC if they've spoken to their other partner yet. at every turn, halsin is incredibly respectful of the PCs other partner, he never diminishes that relationship, nor does he expect the PC to ever place him above that relationship. he even says:

Indeed, I am but one of your lovers. You and I should seek happiness, wherever it lies. You are all I want, but I will not hoard you to myself.

he makes it very clear from the get-go that he has no designs on the PC's other relationship and that he is more than happy to take whatever they want to give him.

which leads me to my overarching point: astarion is consenting to this dynamic specifically because the other person in question is halsin.

and we know this for a few reasons. first, because.... mechanically in game, he's the only person you can romance at the same time as astarion. while astarion mentions at various points that he is fine with "arrangements", generally speaking, every other potential romance partner results in a "you have to choose one of us" conversation. the reason astarion gives for why the PC has to choose varies, i believe, but since i don't have the dialogue on hand (i have been faithful as hell in my playthrough) i won't speculate about those conversations.

however, we also know that astarion is consenting to an arrangement with halsin specifically because of this line:

The druid is unique. He has a lot of experience with this type of arrangement. Thus, I'm sure it would be quite a harmless affair.

which is interesting, isn't it? hold onto this one, we'll circle back to it later. and then of course, the other line we need to discuss from astarion here is the famously controversial...

It's not because… you know… we haven't… in a while?

so this is where i get into the potentially controversial take that i have, because it's more nuanced than arguments i've seen on either side of the pro-/anti- polymance debate. but basically i think that astarion is... insecure. shocker, i know. but unlike some takes i've seen, i dont think this means he can't consent to a polyam relationship, i think it means that he has certain Conditions related to it, that he has decided have been met. and i think those conditions are as follows:

the PC's interest in halsin is not borne out of any deficiency of astarion's.

this is why he asks the famous question. he's insecure, and making sure that the PC's interest in halsin is not because astarion is failing to "satisfy" them, that it's not because he isn't enough. astarion has a lot of self-worth issues that he tries really hard to hide, and i think it would be easy for him to think that the PC starting another relationship could be a result of him being... insufficient.

for people who have never been in a polyam relationship, this is a thing. this is an important thing, and making sure all of your partners feel that they're valued and "enough" is an important part of navigating these relationships. astarion does the right thing here, by expressing his insecurity and asking for reassurance. and when the PC gives it to him, the relief is evident and he gives consent to the dynamic immediately. not because he's been coerced, but because he's been reassured.

PC: Gods, I don't want you to think that for a moment. Astarion: I know I was being foolish. But thank you for saying it.

the second condition is:

that he is still a priority

this is pretty self explanatory but since it's sort of the clincher for my whole argument here, i do have to say the quiet part out loud. i dont think what astarion wants or needs is to be the PC's only partner. he talks about "arrangements" on multiple occasions, i dont think he has a problem with sharing. what i do think he wants is to be the PC's primary partner. what he's consenting to, in my view, is hierarchical polyamory, to use the proper term. as in, the PC can fool around with whoever they want, even have feelings for other people, so long as they always come back to astarion. he needs to feel like he is secure and valued above others as he values them above others. he needs to feel like the PC isn't going anywhere.

and that's why he consents to an arrangement with halsin, but no one else. because all of the other romance options, the origin companions, would want to be equal with astarion, they would want non-hierarchical polyamory. halsin, on the other hand, is all about taking what can be given and having a more fluid understanding of relationships. he doesn't care if he's #1, he cares that the PC cares about him, right now. no formal definitions or obligations required.

that's what astarion means when he says "the druid is unique." that's what he means when he says "he has a lot of experience with this type of arrangement." that's what he means when he says it will be a "harmless affair." because he knows halsin is never going to try to take the PC away from him. he knows halsin isn't going to be a threat to him and his status with his partner. and that's why he's comfortable saying yes, even though he says no to every other possible arrangement.

it's not because he was coerced. it's not because he doesn't know how to say no. it's because he feels safe. and that's what we want.

some additional notes while i'm here...

on jealousy: a lot of people hc astarion as the jealous type, as perhaps a little possessive, and i am also one of those people. it makes sense; he's a guy who hasn't had anything in 200 years, and the PC is the first person he's cared about like this. i can definitely see him being a little possessive and prone to jealousy. but stepping outside of the realm of fiction, jealous/possessive feelings are often the result of insecurity and in real relationships should absolutely not be used as a tool to control the behaviour of another partner. and, crucially, jealous/possessive feelings are a thing to be talked about and worked through, not tip-toed around. the presence of those feelings does not automatically mean that a polyamorous relationship is impossible, it just means there's another thing to talk about, and by astarion consenting to the PC having another relationship, he's pretty clearly saying he's willing to talk through those feelings and work on them.

on the ability to consent: i know that astarion doesn't talk about his feelings enough. but i truly dont think that this is a case of astarion saying yes when he means no. astarion can say no, even in high pressure situations he wasn't expecting. he says no to the astral-touched tadpole (rather firmly, i might add), he says no to sleeping with the drow twins, etc. the scene that most people use as proof that astarion cannot consent happens in a much different emotional context, with a lot of direct coercion, and is followed by astarion taking back personal control and dumping the PC. that is not what happens in this scene, when astarion is consenting to a polyamorous relationship. there is no coercion (in fact the PC can explicitly say "i wouldn't even consider it if it bothered you", and astarion expected the conversation, so he would have been able to prepare his thoughts and feelings ahead of time. at no point does he say no or even imply he's not okay with an arrangement with halsin.

on timing: ive seen some people say that they would be more okay with the astarion-halsin polymance if all of this was not be happening right now. i agree with that. ideally, astarion would have more time to adjust to his relationship before it was opened up at all. but because this is a video game, everything is happening during the events of the game. and because this is a video game, the events of the game are high pressure and wild and everything is happening all at once. i don't blame people who elongate the timeline in fan content, or who turn down halsin because they think its "too soon." thats actually very explicitly something halsin says when he initially propositions the player - that he hopes it isn't "too soon." however, astarion still consents (see point above), and relationships barely ever have good timing. one could argue that even the solomance with astarion does not have good timing, when considering astarion's trauma and recovery. so. we make do. and i think it would be... a disservice? to what is (in my opinion) really good polyam writing to just say "actually it's all terrible and icky because there's a lot going on right now" and dismiss it out of hand.

.......................and i think that's everything. thank you for joining me on this very long (oops) deep dive into this. a double thank you for reading all the way through if you don't like the astarion-halsin polymance. i hope i gave you a different perspective, even if i didn't change your mind. love ya <3

#i am happy to have discussions on this post but let's be civil please!#astarion #halsin #halsinmance #halsin polymance #bg3 #bg3 meta #mine

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1eoness · 1 year

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CHANGE.

cw: re4remake leon... just a lil more rude than usual. covers very sensitive topics: theft and surrogate prostitution (not mentioned), SUPERRR NOT CANON.

nsfw cw: DUBCON i think? (always practice safe and consensual sex) (slight-enemy smut idfk) dom!re4remake leon kennedy x sub! fem/afab-reader. size kink, creampie?? spit kink?? squirting?? mild degradation, pet names, feminine terms... straight up porn tbh i dont even know BRUHH WTFI DONT EVEN KNOW THE THINGS I WRITE

[to clarify, i am a minor (17). anyone <17 and anyone >17 uncomfortable with interacting pls dni]

‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ ♡ ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ ♡ ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵

synopsis :

your job is simple. as long as you exploit and delude the men at the top of the social pyramid, ada sponsored you with her safety and training. though, your naivete made it easy for ada to convince you that you weren't just some dirty pawn stationed in a particular estate—which happens to be leon's next mission area.

when he encounters you to perform your arrest, leon prays to any god up there that he has the patience not to mess you over for turning into the person you've become today.

‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ ♡ ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ ♡ ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿

"— just listen to me, damn it!" leon scolded as he tugged onto the metal that strung your cuffed wrists together, cutting your retorts off with your abrupt grit of pain. your insistence of denying his chances without hearing him out made you more irritable than you already were. "you have no idea what you're carrying. you're gonna start a fucking epidemic if you take that anywhere near ada, you understand?"

it was understandable. you were carrying a formula. some unethical, potent 'opium' derived from a variant of the t-virus. freshly baked by some ex-umbrella geeks, it was marketed to be an effective drug, planned to be distributed to some sort of paramilitary in spain to modify their strength to inexplicable heights (which was proved to be false, yet some arrogant virologists insisted it had potential, so unethical 'scientists' wanted to get their hands on improving it). that's all you know about it, anyway.

leon's true nature behind his words rooted from the fact that he was fucking worried for you and it's not only because of the position that ada put you in right now. that enigmatic woman, treating you like some guinea pig and you couldn't even see it. it surprised leon that you were even alive.

leon knew you way before ada discovered you in that dark junction, before you dropped out of police academy without a word and went back to your old ways of 'getting through life'.

leon was your role model. he was the first one to make friends with you while you stood 'incompetent' in that academy.

but people dug their eyes in you because of your history. all it takes is a few facebook searches and some names for the other fellow cadets to define you using your past. and when the awareness rose to leon, he was the first one to defend you.

the eidetic memory of you; you were sat on a hall bench with his jacket hung loosely over your dropping shoulders, gripping an unopened water bottle that turned lukewarm. your fingers felt numb from the tremors of anxiety, and the broodingly saddened look in your eyes.

he was knelt in front of his dear friend, trying to reassure you that people can change, and you were already making those efforts. his thumbs held your palms when with a serious tone, encouraged you into promising him that you will never change; because you are a sweet girl and you never deserved to be shamed for something you thought was your survival. within this promise, he also promised you that as long as you kept your self-faith you will never go back to what you hated being. you should've seen how genuine his smile look when you chuckled sheepishly, the flush on your cheeks earning a double reasoning.

and now, it pained him more to realize that he regrets not making another promise, one he held back from saying that night. don't leave him.

a very selfish, unwarranted yet passionate part of him believes that you'd been so cruel to him, abandoning him like that. and now you want to leave again?

now you're being reprimanded by the cop who you looked at like he was a hero.

where was the bright cadet in those eyes, the one that looked up to him?

and it was just great of you to articulate further on how much he underestimated your stubbornness."i'm slowing you down. if it's not me (who will escort the sample), it's gonna be ada. you thought she was a one-man job? that you can somehow negotiate with her because you guys fucked once? my god, have you ever changed?-" out of being so naive? but the words don't follow because he knows you were going to say it.

leon's hand slid from your back to grip harshly at the back collar of your shirt, lifting your chest up from the table abruptly. he locked eyes with you, hidden tension bubbling the air like odorless toxins. he scoffs, and his low voice turned deliberate as he tried to spell the irony out for you. "ada. doesn't. work with people. she uses them, and you're not some 'special exception'."

and it's true, he knows it all too well..

"she uses... people like you." you were quick to correct him indignantly with a struggling breath. leon knew nothing about you and ada. ada was like a big sister to you. she taught you what you couldn't learn at police academy. she understood where you came from, and she knows the lowest moments in your life. but leon knew all of that too, didn't he?

"you know why?"

he scoffs. "enlighten me." and there was a subtle increase of tightness in his grip, eyes narrowing down at your bent-over body in anticipation.

"'cause you're a fuck up, kennedy."

upon hearing your quips, he thought maybe he should add a small noise of pain to it, because he flushed you further against the surface with a force that hinted irritation. he had enough of this pointless hissing. "listen, y'little bitch..." he gruffed with the mere frustration surging his voice. he's probably never addressed a woman like that, but oh, how people can shift within the span of their emotion. "you have the sample, now tell me where it is. and if you have it, then you know what to do."

leon wasn't confident that you had the item on you, knowing ada was most likely using you as a decoy. he didn't want to hurt you. even if you've looked like you've changed; to him, you haven't..

of course you were holding the "formula", leon was just dumb enough to think you actually had it on you. your eyes fluttered before you laughed emptily in heavy breaths, peeking over your shoulder whilst he did not let up on you. your torso was starting to fucking hurt. but so was your pride. "then come get it, rookie." you baited.

you ignited an internal burn he didn't even know he had. one that reached the peak of its abrasion.

"..fuck you." he growled inaudibly before you yelped, feet off the ground. and fuck ada, too.

‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ ♡ ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ ♡ ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿

if you were gonna keep acting like a brat, he was going to fuck you like one.

his hand came behind your head, locking your hair in a tight grip while you felt his tongue glide against yours in a messy kiss. an overwhelming amount of affectionate frustration surged as he propped you up firmer on that desk. he ate your whines as he tired your damp mouth out, the rising feeling of grudge-rooted sexual frustration pining somewhere inside him hotly.

"why do you hate me so much, mmm?" he gasped quietly for a breath, his hand letting go of your hair and holding both sides of your hips, hastily pulling your pants up mid-thigh. he needed to be inside you, he just needed it so bad..

"cause you're .. hhah.. y-you've become too cocky f'your own good, kennedy-" leon scoffs at the sight of you drooled up with the trails of mixed saliva. you're sure that's not you? you could've fooled him, you were fucking sopping—trails of your essence sticking to your underwear. it made him moan low in desperation. he wanted to lick it all up. "is that right.." he muttered with utter lack of amusement as his cold thumb glided over your fluids absentmindedly, spreading one fold apart slightly to get a better look. his eyes soften, breath hitching knowing it's gonna feel so good inside you.

"d-definitely too cocky!-" you insisted with a contrast whine that emitted from your sweet voice, expecting him to start off with letting you adjust to his tip first. but you're hopeless for thinking leon would ever go soft on you just because you only remember the "naive" version of him years ago. people change, right?

you were suddenly squirming when you felt him fill and thrust into you thickly, humbling your little cunny as it pulsated. dumb little bunny, leon thinks to himself, watching you start to fluster and retort weakly beneath him with your ankles on his shoulders.

his hand comes up to your head, smacking your cheek swiftly. "shut up. shut the fuck up." he growls, eyes narrowing mildly, holding your cheeks with one hand as he pried your little mouth open. his thoughts were so guiltily dirty, wondering how cute your throat would look filled with his cock. he'll have to try another time, though, wouldn't he? for now his ring and middle finger deliberately slide into your tongue, savoring the minor 'hhnnn' that lolled out of your sticky tongue as your eyes peered up at him glassily.

the words 'fuck me' were written all over your eyes when his gaze locks down to yours. and could he resist such a pretty baby?- why were you so pretty?

it's a shame that you made so much effort to treat him indifferently, calling him by his last name and all...

your vision felt cloudy given that you were full of leon. but you catch glimpse of the way he smirks at himself before he leans down much closer to your face, folding your legs over and not giving a fuck if it hurts. the simple shift in angle had you crying out as his tip grazed over the right spots.

he spits a string of saliva down into your forced-open mouth, hoping it would furtherly aid in getting you to shut up over something so trivial. "so fucking dirty..." his fingers gently traced your bottom lip while he whispers with mock-disgust, yet it's laced with affection- a twisted pair of feelings that has him needing you at incalculable rates.

his hands come down to the exposed flesh of your hips, fingers dipping into your skin as he holds you still on his girth. it felt even better when you could feel his bulging size rub up inside you hastily— the way he was fucking you fervently and not letting you get away. you're never fucking leaving his sight, or his mind.

"h-how's this for.. uhh-..nngh.. being cocky? huh?" he groaned roughly after stammering with the embers of his frustration. leon's frustrated that he can't speak without stammering, so he takes it out on you with punishing thrusts that have you sobbing louder, mending his ego by ruining yours. he's stripping your pride away with each push into your sweet spots.

you gave in, vulnerable as you started to blabber from the way you were getting your breath knocked up. "hnggghh.... ahh!-.. l-leon!~ n-not there!-"

"there it is.." he mutters to himself sweetly mid-fucking-you-full. you're finally talking to him properly, how cute.. "more, baby?" he taunts with a struggling moan but he doesn't let you react; the only reaction he wants is you reducing beneath him, proving it by his fingers bruising your skin as he rammed into you in a desperate pace. "ngghh uhh.. fuck-" he whines loudly, your hole squelching uncontrollably as he fucks the juices out of you with every sweet drag of his sensitive shaft.

you turn him so soft he hates you for it.. he has such a soft spot for you, doesn't he?

"fuuck, this pussy's.. so good.." his eyes were half-lidded, moaning adorably before whining about the fact that he's about to spill a load inside you. "f-fuck, 'so good, please- mnnnnghh- aahh!~" his voice wavered, still driving his cock into you as he breaks through his limits and makes himself whimper gently, tears softening his eyes.

oh but his poor baby, creaming around his shaft so quickly and relentlessly, only to continue being rutted into like a little toy ♡. he coats your sweet little hole with his cum, flooding and painting it all over as his tip poured deep inside of you with a thick, milky warmth that pooled on the varnished wood.

you weren't even speaking anymore, your words melting on your tongue. he doesn't understand a damn thing you're saying but he doesn't need you to speak, he just needs you to feel good.

"fuck... uhhhnn!~.. fuck me, please, baby.." he blathers before he found himself whining at the way your cunt pulsates, eyes teasing at you subtly while he holds your cheeks together in his domineering hand. he doesn't even pull out much, just shoving and grinding his girth into your creamed-up cunny and making you endure the crushing pleasure. his hands scramble to push against the back of your thighs, folding them to let him fully fill up into your already deflowered, milky vulva.

"n-no, g'nna- leon!" your mind goes into total shudder as your back arched, having him hold your hips in place as you started to gush all over his stuffy girth.

"ohh, mhmm.. that's it, sweet girl.." leon knows you feel good, seeing you cry flusteredly while he still thrusted in you to lengthen the feeling of you cumming. he tore at your pride, pulling out the vulnerable version of yourself he hasn't seen in a long time. especially when you reach up for him like you wanted a hug. that did it for him.

he leans down to pick you up, your legs dangle tiredly around his waist. he's sorry to whoever's bed it was that he laid you down on. he whimpered softly into the fabric of your shoulder while trying to regain his stability. you could faintly feel him pepper tame, short kisses on it mindlessly.

he nuzzles into your skin. "you wanna be a good girl f'me?" he murmurs into your neck breathily.

"mhmm.."

"then get on your knees." leon lets go from holding you—letting you scramble onto all fours.

he stuffs himself back inside your sensitive hole like he's aching for it, making you wail with struggle. with your legs aimlessly sprawled on either side of him, he makes sure you don't stray from him by holding your hips again. the flesh spilling between his fingers as he pulls you closer like he's scared you'll run away. his hips move irrationally, wanting to make sure he's hitting it good, all the right spots again, just for his baby. he's so sensitive it starts to throb, masochistic urges as he overstimulates himself ceaselessly.

"hhhngh... you can't just.. come around- and then leave- like it's nothing!-" leon babbled whiningly between his forceful thrusts, his pace increasing with incessant speed. you could feel his fingers nimbly moving through your scalp, leon's hand holding the back of your head down onto the fluff surface where your cute little cries of pleasure went in vain.

you couldn't take it but leon made you, his constant rutting inside you even after cumming doesn't pause. he's suffocating this way but he doesn't even care. he's so loud behind you, fucking into your messy cunt like it hurts real good.

his attention is divulged slightly when he sees a little glow on the pocket of your shirt. how didn't he spot that? his hand snakes over your breast, fingertips swiftly snagging the high-tech vial and shoving it somewhere in his remaining clothing.

you yelped. ada was going to kill you. "h-hey!-" he notices you trying to look behind you but his hand is quicker, turning your head forwards with a gentle grip of his hand. he muffled your face into the sheets with the force of his hand holding your head, and he snaps his hips faster just to have you all adorable and crying for him again. "y'c-can't take tha-" oh, but what were you going to do about it?

he starts deliberately making up mistranslations of what you wanted to say. "mm, what's that, sweet girl? you want more?... oh, i know, baby, oh shh.. i got'chu, you're so good, huh? uhhuh.." he encouraged amidst fucking you back into a state of distraction, a hazy smile to himself while he considers his mission accomplished.

#straight filth.#leon filth.#leon kennedy x reader smut #leon kennedy smut #IM SORRY IKTHIS IS INACCURATEBUT IM TRYING #leon kennedy x reader

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crayycrayon · 4 months

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SHERLOCK & CO HOT TAKE WARNING

okay before i start this post i am going to clarify. i am gay (unlabelled) and i ship holmes/watson in practically every adaptation.

can you guys fucking shut up about sherlock & co "queerbaiting". can two men seriously just not be friends anymore?

some of you seriously need to take off your yaoi goggles off and learn what a male friendship is. NOTHING in sherlock & co so far between sherlock and john has been blatantly queer (nor do i believe it has been in subtext). "what about this scene!!!" i need you to understand this is your HEADCANON. this is you HEADCANONING what you see from a scene.

i love sherlock x john in sherlock & co a lot! but i recognise that nothing so far has been gay between them because their friendship is STILL DEVELOPING. i seriously cannot comprehend how people are ALREADY accusing this series of queerbaiting if it doesn't make them canon. YOU GUYS ARE THE REASON PEOPLE DONT TAKE QUEERBAITING CLAIMS SERIOUSLY ANYMORE!

adding onto my previous post about mariana, this exact reason is why people belittle her character down as a "threat" to a gay ship (even though she's ALSO only acted as a friend to sherlock and john)

it'd be nice if it became canon. id be super happy if it became canon. but i am not expecting it to be canon. i will not claim from what we have seen so far that we were queerbaited if it doesn't become canon. and if you do (from what we have seen so far, if the series seriously does queerbait us ovb this doesn't apply) i think you're a dumbass.

#sherlock & co #sherlock and co #sherlock holmes #john watson #cray s&co complaining #<this is my tag where i complain about things i see in the s&co fandom btw

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charlesswife · 1 year

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Una Noche En Mónaco ii

Mateo Con Una T (Mateo with one t)

unem masterlist

pairing: charles leclerc x latina! reader

summary: after a one night stand between you and charles, he continues on with his formula one career. until two months later, you come back claiming to be pregnant with his child.

warning: bad writing, charles is a bit of an asshole at first, google translate because i dont speak french, teen pregnancy, english isnt my first language so there might be some grammatical error.

a/n: THANK YOU FOR ALL THE LOVE AND SUPPORT YOU GUYS HAVE SHOWN IN THE FIRST EPISODE! It makes me so happy to know that you guys really liked it. I really have sooooo many ideas and twist for this book, like you guys have no idea, so always expect the unexpected hehehe

Just to clarify y/l/n is your last name. This is your story so I didn't want to give reader a last name.

second A/N: for some reason i can't write chapters on my phone because the letters are black. I have it in dark mode but i didnt have that problem before. does anyone else have that problem?

gif is not mine!

May 2018

Charles Leclerc was a gentleman. That's how I remember him. The way he took care of me after the several rounds of sex we had. He is definitely the kind of man I don't ever want to forget. He was very sweet and caring.

But he was only a one-night stand. I don't really know him, as him. The fact that I have to tell him I'm pregnant with his child absolutely terrifies me. I wish my parents were here. If they were, I don't think I would be in this situation.

Charles sent me the address where he was staying at. As I got closer to the place, I realized it was the same place where I woke up. Is this his apartment?

Steph left me at the doorstep. I needed her as moral support, just in case things didn't go as planned.

"Go," Steph said as she hugged me. "I'll be waiting in the car, don't worry. If he does anything, we'll sue him. You have the money for it"

Money wasn't a problem for me. I just wanted him to be there, I'm scared and I don't want to do this alone. I know Steph is here for me, but it is not her responsibility at all, it is mine and his.

I took a long breath and rang the bell. Steph went back to the car and after a few minutes, Charles opened the door.

He had such a bright smile on his face. "Oh, cara mia," he pulled me into his apartment and then close the door. He grabbed my face with both of his hands and try to kiss me but I pushed him slightly by his chess. His thick brows frowned a bit and then he asked, "What's wrong?"

I looked at him in the eyes and said. "We need to talk"

February 2023

I walked to my bookstore with Mateo in hand. Steph was the first one to greet us.

"Auntie!" Mateo let go of my hand and ran to my best friend.

"Maty!" Steph got down to the level of my kid and hugged him. "Uff, why are you getting so big, huh? How is my favorite godson doing?"

Mateo laughed. "I'm your only godson, tia" (aunt)

"How would you know, Alexander Jules?"

"Mommy told me, and Mommy would never lie," he pointed at me. "Verdad, mami?" (right, Mommy?) he looked back at me.

"Si, mi amor (yes, my love)" I nodded at him. "Stay with your tia (aunt) while I check stuff in the store, okay? And don't forget to pick up a book" I told him, to which he nodded.

Mateo Alexander Jules Y/l/n is four and one quarter. He likes to remind people of that. He is the most educated boy I know, and I'm not saying that just because I'm his mother, but because it's the truth. I have seen other kids and they are horrible, ungrateful brats. I hate kids. Except for my son. I want to think I did a good job raising him. He looks a lot like Charles. From the eyes' color and shape to the dimples to the hair, to the lips.

I walked around the store, checking books that needed to be restocked and putting some books back in place. I went to the cafe and got my regular iced coffee.

I walked around again until I got to my favorite section. Murder & Mysteries. In there, I saw a lady. Probably in her mid-50s. Blonde hair, she was dressed casually. She was looking around at the books. Picking one up, reading the back, and then putting the book back on the shelf.

"Do you need any help?" I asked her.

She turned around and looked at me up and down. "Oh, dear. I thought I was alone. You work here?"

"Something like that," This answer seemed to confuse her. "Is there anything I could help you with?"

She turned her sight to the books again. "Well, I'm trying to find a good mystery book but none of them catches my eye. I'm looking for something similar to Alexander Y/l/n or Perla Campos. They are my favorite authors"

I stared at her for a second. What are the odds? I looked back at the bookshelf until I found the book I was looking for. "This one should do."

She looked at the cover and asked "The Seven and 1/2 Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle?"

"It's not as near as good as what Alexander Y/l/n and Perla Campos used to write, but if you like their books, I'm sure you'll like this one," I explained as I see her read the back of the book. "Another option would be 'The Secret Inheritance' by Cassandra Matthew." (lmao idk if that book is real)

I handed her the book and she took it gladly. She read the back and then looked at me. "These are very good suggestions! Thank you, dear. What's your name?"

"Y/n," I told her.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Pascale"

August 2018

Pregnancy wasn't easy. I never thought I would cry so much in the span of 5 minutes just because I ran out of my favorite gelato.

Today was my fifth visit to the doctor, and I was nervous as hell. I am more bigger than a regular pregnant woman, it has me fearing for my baby's life or even mine.

"Okay, Y/n. You know the drill. Lay down, and lift your shirt up. As always the gel is cold" Dr. Williams said. She is always so gentle with me. Maybe she pities me.

"I have concerns," I told her. She looked at me as she was putting on the gel. "My belly looks bigger than normal, is that okay?"

"It depends, in most cases, yes. It means the baby is healthy. But let's take a look" She moved her sight to the machine. The image of my baby appears immediately in the sonogram. She moved the transducer to another spot on my belly and I could see her eyes widen a bit. She was going on up and down in the same area. "I think I have a better answer to your question." She looked at me and said, "You're having twins"

February 2023

"Mami, can I read Nancy Drew?" Mateo came running to me as he showed me the first book in the series.

I looked at the book and say "I don't think so, love. It might be too much for you. This is for bigger kids"

"But I am a big kid!" The old lady, Pascale, laughed.

"This is your son?" she asked.

I nodded with a smile. Mateo looked at Pascale and stayed quiet. He knew it was rude to interrupt conversations. He got behind me, hiding.

Pascale tilted her head for a moment, narrowed her eyes a bit, and murmured "He kind of looks like... never mind. What's your name, little boy?"

He looked at me for a second. "Answer her, baby. It's rude to not answer to elders" I told him.

"I'm Mateo with one T" he lifted one finger.

This made Pascale laugh again. "Nice to meet you, Mateo with one T"

"Why don't you take the book to Tia and tell her I say to check it out" Mateo nodded and ran towards the register, he stopped for a second and came back walking.

"Goodbye," He said to Pascale while giving her a little waving and then walking back to the register.

"He looks like a bundle of joy," Pascale said as she sees Mateo walk away.

"He is," I agreed. "Is there anything else I can help with?"

"No, that's all. Thank you for the help. I'm ready to check out."

We walked to the register and started the process to check her out. I did the usual routine. I asked if she had an account with us, which she didn't, but she decided to get one.

"Okay, Pascale. What's your last name?"

"You can just put an L," I did as she told me. As I was checking out her books, she said "This is such a pretty bookstore. I have never been here before."

"Thank you," I said.

"She's the owner," Steph spoke as she was playing hands with my son, who shushed her for butting in the conversation.

Pascale looked at me with wide eyes. I laughed at her reaction. She inserted her card and paid. I put her books in a bag and grabbed one of the coupons. "Here is a ten-percent coupon to use on your next visit!"

"I will definitely come back. I need to tell you if I like the books or not."

"Oh boy," I laughed.

"I might even bring one of my sons with me" Oh boy... This isn't the first time a mother has try to set me up with their kids.

"Please do!" Steph yelled. Mateo put his small hands in her mouth and murmured a small 'no tia, don't talk'.

"See you next time, Pascale"

"Bye Y/n," She walked to the entrance as she passed my boy, she turned and say "Goodbye, Mateo with one T"

"Bye-bye."

After she left the store, Steph turned to me. "She didn't say goodbye to me. How rude?"

"Jesus Christ, Steph. Why would you tell her that?" I elongated the a in 'that'.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

I know I left you guys with open scenes between the first and third scenes but everything is for a reason!!! I might do Charles POV on the next one!!! Trust the process guys, things are going to get sooo good.

If you guys don't know (just in case) Pascale is Charles' mother.

Please let me know what you think of it. I would really appreciate any type of comment, whether is your opinion or just anything! It would def motivate me to keep going. I would really appreciate if you guys like and repost as well! So other people can be aware of this story.

@mac-daddy-210 @infinite-wanders @rbrsavage @itsyogurlkel @bbygrlllllll @nerdreader @imnotcryingyouare1 @killerangel88 @obx-mylove-things-blog @triorion @daniellarogers @insssanemind @bosinclairsgf @rb-danny @shyshva @booksobsess @ogfangirl @ravenqueen27 @masonspulisic @yunnie-f1 @simxican @ushygushybaby @graceverstappen11 @maximoff-xmen @severenswife @ferraribabe @pjofics @harrysdimple05 @mloyer @teti-menchon0604 @imagineadream @reidsworld @heavengirls111 @scentedskydreamer @christianpulisic10 @formulas-bitch @topguncultleader @hc-dutch @moonclaine @miureiz @tall-tanned-tattoo @madisontaxarn @bisexualbith

For some reason, it's not letting me tag some of you so people make sure your tag is correct. I want everyone to get the notification and this is beyond me.

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the-solar-system52 · 3 months

Text

I was listening to Sun's Help Wanted 2 voicelines again and noticed something interesting I wanna discuss (spoilers: Fazbear Entertainment is doing something shady again)

First, we need to clarify something. It pretty clear that our POV character in HW2 is an adult, and someone who works at Fazbear Entertainment. Once more, I think this minigame is supposed to be like a test simulation of how Sun would act around a child, which explains why we are a grown adult playing arts and crafts. And explains why there are no other children present. The player and Sun have to act out the situation of Arts and Crafts, as a test of some sorts, like employee training.

I think this is why Sun's personality is so inconsistent throughout the minigame. He will go from calling us his 'friend' to insulting us in a second. Sun isn't perfect, but I doubt this is how he would actually act around a child.

His personality is changing because some voicelines are him playing along with the role play, and pretending our POV character is a child. And the others are him going off-script and making jabs at Fazbear Entertainment by insulting us and our work.

This is also why he compliments our artwork and then proceeds to shred it. Because its not real, its just a role play, so there's no need to keep the artwork. I dont think he'd shred a real child's artwork. The player character probably isn't even offended by it.

No matter what DCA lore you believe, it always circles back to Sun being treated awfully by Fazbear Entertainment. Mainly, they refuse to properly fix the Moon problem and I think this explains some of Sun's weirdly out of character voicelines in this. His attitude probably stems from the fact our characters works for Fazbear Entertainment, and he has a huge grudge against the company and all who work there.

"Ha, I should turn off the lights myself."

"Do it again, and you're taking a nap."

Sun is absolutely terrified of the Moon and the dark. From all his other behaviours in other games, it doesn't make sense for him to joke about the lights going out and a child getting hurt. But if our POV character isn't a child, then it makes more sense. Since it's Fazbear Entertainment fault that Moon is so violent, he doesn't mind using some dark humour because he feels like the employee deserves it. Reaping what you sow, in a way. Sure our character is just an employee and doesn't make big decisions like that, but Sun doesn't know that and I don't really blame him for being distrusting to any adult human he meets.

A lot of people, mainly Moon fans, try to use that first line about the lights to reason that Sun isn't actually that scared of Moon. Because he can joke about it, which obviously means he would be willing to turn the lights off out of spite! And he isn't as afriad as we originally thought!

But if you listen past this line into other voicelines, you can see this obviously isn't true. At some point, Sun mentions that it will be naptime soon, and is obviously very scared. He pushes the player character to finish the art quicker and generally becomes more and more anxious and frustrated from that point onward. So it's clear he is still very afraid of Moon, and probably wouldn't be okay with our character getting murdered.

(Also, literally everything that happens in the hard mode of this level confirms this.)

Anyway, this is where it gets really interesting in context. Because when he mentions it's nearing naptime he says,

"Don't work in the dark, never work in the dark."

And then, after a second, adds

"You'll...hurt your eyes if you work in the dark."

This is obviously a cover-up as to the real reason you can't work in the dark, Moon. But it's not like this employee wouldn't already know about Moon.

(Probably my favourite peice of worldbuilding in SB is that Sun literally has a warning for Moon at the back of his head, so this cover-up isn't so the employee doesn't learn about Moon, because they obviously already have.)

But with the context that this is supposed to the employee acting out the role of a child, this made me realise something.

Fazbear Entertainment doesn't allow Sun to talk about Moon.

Listen to the line again, and tell me you don't hear it! It sounds like he just remembered the employee was in the room and had to add the excuse on quickly so he didn't get in trouble.

He never calls Moon by name, and always uses some sort of riddle or metaphor to explain what is happening to him. At first I thought that was just how he talked, but maybe it's because he's just not allowed to tell people whats going on!

He omniously warns Gregory to keep the lights on, but doesn't tell him why. Even when Gregory gets closer to the security desk he only says "that area is off limits" and doesn't try to explain how dire the situation really is.

Hell, even when the lights are out and he has nothing left to lose, he doesn't say anything direct about Moon that would help Gregory.

Maybe part of the reason he banned Gregory from the daycare is because he felt he had no other option, it would be pretty hard for Gregory to stay if Sun couldn't explain what just happened.

And you could make the argument that he's just trying not to freak out Gregory, but what about a situation where he has no hope of not freaking someone out? Why doesn't he say anything about Moon then, if he once again, doesn't have anything left to lose.

When he meets Cassie he says

"I am trapped in a nap!"

And in Help Wanted 2 he says

"He'll wake up if the lights go out."

Both use sleep as a metaphor for not being in control of the body, even though I highly doubt Moon is actually unconscious during these moments, since Moon always seems to know where is his target is, so I'm guessing he has Sun's memories.

Again in Ruin, he instructed Cassie to turn on the generators, warned her when it wasn't safe, and even sang a creepy metaphor-ridden version of Daisy Bell! And yet he never mentions Moon by name??

He also never mentions Eclipse by name, and instead just asks Cassie to make them "whole".

And in Help Wanted 2, there was no reason he couldn't properly explain the situation to the employee in the hard mode, since they weren't in the role play anymore.

For whatever reason, Fazbear Entertainment has pretty much brainwashed him to never directly mention Moon. I think this was probably to keep up the false narrative they have made with the Moondrop Candy posters that Moon is a good guy. And Sun telling the kids, or other people, the truth about Moon would be bad for publicity.

I feel really bad for Sun though, that he couldn't properly warn anyone if the lights were about to go out, or talk about his problems at all.

What I'm really interested in is if he has just been told not to say anything OR is there something in his coding literally stopping him from saying Moon's name. Like, if he tried, he would just go mute and not be able to talk.

Although the latter is an interesting concept, I don't think it's true.

First if all, Moon mentions Sun by name in his Ruin voicelines and I wouldn't really make sense for this coding to only apply to Sun.

Second of all, even if his code prevents him from talking about Moon, if he was really determined to say something, he could just use substitute words, write, draw, or in any other way communicate what he wants to say and bypass the coding.

No, I think it's a little more psychological. It could be possible Fazbear Entertainment has simply just told him to keep his mouth shut, and since they have control over everything in the Pizzaplex, he's too afraid to go against them. I wouldn't put it past them to threaten to turn the lights off if he speaks up either. Or to scrap him.

Sun has always had an irrational attachment to rules, which would also be explained by Fazbear Entertainments threats. He determined to keep things clean in the Daycare, but his room is an absolute mess. He doesn't bat an eye at Gregory trespassing in the Pizzaplex at night, but does care when he goes into an "off limits" area. His hypocritical and confusing take on rules can be explained by these not actually being his real opinions, but just paranoid habits brought on Fazbear Entertainment's treatment of him.

"You're gonna get us in trouble..."

As far as we know, he doesn't have any friendships with the other animatronics. And besides Moon's patrols, Sun never seems to leave the daycare. Dudes just a paranoid loser with no friends. (real)

In conclusion, fuck Fazbear Entertainment and I hope the next game involves a robot uprising of sorts.

Edit: I have no clue how forgot this, but thank you to @technowingsgs for reminding me of Sun's line,

"Not me! The OTHER me!"

This is probably the most egregious and direct example of Sun refusing to say Moon's name. Since he's trying to tell Cassie that she needs to reboot Moon, but can't get away with just using a pronoun, he actually resorts to using an alias. Which may point more to the theory that its his coding that stops him from mentioning Moon, since hes ok with using an alternative name, but I'm not sure. But it could be a combination of factors.

I mean, I doubt its just that Sun doesn't know Moon's name. If MY name was SUN and I saw merch littered around the pizzaplex of a dude that looked like THIS:

Wouldn't exactly take a genius to come up with a name.

Also! A lot of people were confused at this line and didn't know why Cassie couldn't just reboot Sun in his AR body. So I want to attempt to explain what I think!

It seems that, since Moon is controlling their real body, Sun's consciousness has been pushed into the AR World. And the thing about the AR World is that it isn't exactly real. MXES can't hurt you when you take the mask off, because he doesn't have a physical body, he's more of an ghost or hologram. You can walk through walls, use portals, and enter arcade machines. Overall, it's seems to be some sort of non-physical unreality.

So the reason Sun tells you to reboot Moon and not him, is because he's really talking about his physical body and his AR body. If you tried to reboot him with the Vanny mask on, it simply wouldn't work!

This because you have to stick the fazwrench into his head, flip a switch, and that somehow merges Sun and Moon's code together into Eclipse. Their code is no doubt stored in a circuit board of some sorts, maybe even the one that's visible at the back of their head. All of these things are physical changes, that rely on the materials and mechanics inside his physical body. So if you tried to reboot him in a non-physical plane, it wouldn't do anything! Since AR Sun is more of a projection of his consciousness, like a ghost, and isn't fully connected to his corporeal body. Thus, the fazwrench couldn't reach the necessary code inside his circuit boards. That's why he asked you to turn the lights on, so Moon would freeze up and you could safely reach him.

That, and the game would be too easy if you didn't have to turn on the generators to freeze Moon! Sorry if that segment was too technical, I waffled on a bit.

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 7 months

Note

AITA for "causing a stain on a marriage" and ruining a honeymoon?

Hey everyone! This is a separate AITA issue, but also technically an update idk if that's allowed.

I'm the one who asked AITA for telling my hairdresser the truth.

I (25f) had a friend D (31m). He married an 18f recently. I do want to clarify something I said in the last post because I saw in responses I didn't write it out clearly. I do NOT approve of minors dating adults. I do NOT approve of 18-21 year olds dating people way older then them. If I, a 25 year old, wanted to date someone older with that same age gap, that would be fine. That's what I meant when I said I typically didn't have an issue with age gaps, but I realized I didn't write that well.

Anyways onto the reason I sent this in:

I saw D in person. Him and his...wife... have been married for a bit now. Anyways, I was trying to avoid him. He knew. Because he called me later that day and asked me why.

I calmly told him we weren't friends and I felt weird. He asked me why snd I told him, I felt weird about his wife. I also told him I didn't appreciate him calling me names. He flat out asked me what names, I said the name back, and he said "I would never say that you must have misheard me". He kept getting louder and I know for a FACT I didn't mishear because I clarified "did you just call me ----" and he said YES

So I yelled at him "you're a manipulative asshole and a groomer" to which he went quiet. And then his wife spoke. Apparently I was on speaker the entire time. She said I was jealous and an asshole and hung up on me.

An hour later his mother called me and at least she told me I was on speaker. It was her, D, the wife, the wife's mother and maybe someone else those are the only ones who spoke. They all took turns expressing how hurt they felt and how I was putting a stain on their marriage and how I was ruining their honeymoon. I flat out said they aren't even on their honeymoon rn so that shouldn't matter.

I said, and I quote," You chose to call me. I tried to avoid you. I want nothing to do with you, as far as I'm concerned im done. I won't talk about you, dont talk about me." To which the hairdresser got brought up by D. She didn't name me, but she dropped him. D claimed I swayed her. I said "if your actions swayed her then that was on you". I then was getting yelled at by many and the mom again yelled at me and cursed at me and said Ime calling him a groomer (pls note I hadn't except for the phone call earlier that day) could have complications for him and I shouldn't be "a vindictive jealous bitch".

I replied "im not jealous, if I had wanted him I could have, but that just proves he is one" and hung up.

I didnt realize fully until my sister brought up what happened when I was 16, D had tried to date me. It was a short period and he had flirted with me and would constantly buy me stuff and then guilttrip me for it.

To be quite honest a lot happened between us but I had told him I never wanted to date him. He did hold my first kiss over my head, which I hadn't even wanted to kiss me he just did. To be honest, I never wanted to think about it and so I didn't. Cause from that point on he had always dated women his age or older.

I guess I was groomed too. I'm not even sure, because as some people noted it is a small community. You talk to one person and guaranteed they are related or friends with the person you are talking about. Everyone knows everyone. His mom had always told me that he had only developed a crush on me because of the closeness and I had accepted that. I hadn't seen anything wrong with it when i was 16, but it makes me grossed out now.

I went on a tangent sorry, but the mother has vagueposted about me and people are assuming me. A few coworkers are asking me about the situation and I've not said anything. But apparently D and his wife are fighting now and im being blamed. His entire family is sending me messages and I have these new accounts send me messages, idk if they are real or not. I've deleted most of my social media now, because everyone is telling me I was in the wrong for trying to tear them apart and that they should be a happy newlywed couple and instead I've ruined that.

So AITA?

TLDR: my exfriend (31m) married an 18f. I called him a manipulative asshole and a groomer. His entire family is coming at me now and sending me messages. Genuinely unsure how to feel because part of me feels bad that I hurt the girl, the other half is pissed everyone is defending him and doesn't care.

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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dilfhos · 8 months

Text

sooo this is gonna be a messy rant on the observations ive made between different writer communities, blog interactions and overall “status”. just silly little things I’ve noticed in my 4+ years being on tumblr btwn 2 diff blogs. and this is about no one specific, a very generalized post so if you find urself offended i honestly dont know what to tell you?? :o do better ig. & if you relate, i feel for you. TLDR @/end.

i dont like interacting/ building connections with people but not for the reasons ppl think. im not stuck up or pretentious or weird or anything. just another anime-enjoyer who loves to write in her free time. nobody special by a longshot!! i enjoy writing, always have since before i was a teen. (wasn’t always ff tho!).

but over the years ive just noticed fandom writing has its gritty sides that no one talks about often and its no mystery why so many prolific/ popular writers deactivated, me included. i had some shitty experiences and have seen friends go bc of it.

firstly, I’ve noticed, once you start interacting and building friendships with people, it’s easier to see the bigger perspective of where ppl stand and the blatant hierarchy of friendships and groups. same applies to that outside. like its literally just me n’ my bsf then my acquaintances bc mfs be weirddd omg its like cults or something. like thats why initially I didn’t interact w/anyone starting on my new blog. that n’ fear of drama following from my last blog ugh. ‘Cept the few i’ve met on my old blog (like my wifey)

not to mention i have bad anxiety. and sometimes im cue-deaf. i dont always pick up what people put down and vice versa and it makes me conscious in a lot of my interactions. so a part of me doesn’t want to interact at all to avoid all awkwardness and possible miscommunications. that’s not to say i don’t notice subtle changes in interactions after one situation / conversation or so forth, that in myself or witnessed between other ppl. (im perceptive, just not that good conversationalist lol. like i really have to try.)

but then…if you don’t interact with people on here, your chances of building an audience or a reader base is slim to none. the likelihood of developing relationships is zip. because you’re already perceived and pegged as just another tumblr writer. pause. to clarify, a writer who doesn’t want any recognition or interactions from mutuals or new friends. or just a lonely writer? a introverted, lonely writer. which leads to little to none interactions (anons, reblogs, moots —exposure.)

so then its like you’re kinda placed btwn a rock n a hard place. and there’s absolutely no problem with that! in fact this is the best part—meeting friends and like-minded people! people that make being online all the more worth it right? thirsting over fictional characters and sharing in each other’s works!

but you have to be in specific circles it seems. but then you can’t imply that you want to be in those circles bc then you’re desperate.

but well, then you cant purposefully want to be independent or be on your own or else you’re a hater, hypocrite or stuck up. not to mention, no one will reblog your stuff lol. no one will interact fr, and you’re friendless essentially. and god forbid if you disagree on something as if opinions don’t exist btw! then you’re being ganged up on. (like omg grow up!)

but then if you reach out you’re seen as trying to wedge in or kiss ass? you interact and follow and you’re ignored or left hanging? (bc im gonna touch your hand when i say this—it never gave fan, your majesty of horny nerds) and this is about ALL the writing communities and fandoms—spicy content, black content and dark content. ALL.

yet no one wants to talk about the pregnant elephant in the room—bias. and favoritism. also people seem to have a hard time being direct with how they’re feeling toward/about someone ( in a good or bad way) which in turn leads to a lot of miscommunication and subliminal attacks. (not to mention hate anons? one of my moots just had her inbox flooded w/them recently, ew.)

you can lead a horse to water AND you can write a 500-word essay on the observations made on tumblr writers as a whole. (a long ass post on the truth on behalf of those feeling this too)

also, slapping a HEY LOOK AT ME! IM A WRITER WHO WANTS INTERACTION AND FRIENDS! on a blog is frankly embarrassing. it shouldn’t even take all that seeing how easy it is for others wanting the same thing.

or doing less to achieve the same result.

not to mention, yall shit on ppl who essentially feel this way altogether bc you peg them as sb who doesn’t “try” or just jealous when their own works are phenomenally written themselves. ive seen it. and ive lived it. never gave jealousy baby.

at the end of the day, we’re all writers— either longterm or hobbyists. (personally, im longterm) self-indulgent or not! and its absolutely amazing when people are being fair in how they spread love and feedback to their writers.

Secondly, its not news that people have to want to reblog your fics so that their followers can reblog, so they can reblog, and their followers can reblog and so forth. but ppl honestly dont care atp bc once they’ve already read it, they owe you nothing. and apparently asking for reblogs is crass and bold. (imma do it anyway) but putting your very all into a story just to turn and see a half-thought out hc soaring 3k in 2hrs and 5k in a day — you have to stfu, open your ass and take it. keep it cute!

you’re getting fucked after all!!

because if you complain—you’re just jealous and lazy and uncreative!! and i hate that to seem like a writer worth a damn, you have to change up your writing style every two weeks to fit in with trending waves.

“no more poetic long fics, nobody’s into that! short, snappy slutty shots are all the rage!” “ppl are only into these specific tropes but you can’t exceed 2k words!” “only add trending characters to these hcs! ppl love them only!” “don’t write too much about a specific character or else ill unfollow you!” its exhausting.

i am well within my right as a literary artist to desire more feedback and interaction on anything i put out. period. and you are too! 🫵

God, im tired of that stupid, ‘you have to enjoy your writing for yourself and not worry about notes’ line. i do love my writing! don’t get me wrong there’s nobody id rather write like if not myself fr. not to mention the inspiration i draw from famous literary authors. however, i would love feedback and the same energy that i see with others in my same caliber.

and when i see others that didn’t even try fr—its a slap in the face to put it bluntly.

i can want silly little comments and notes about something i cherish and put out for that reason and yall aren’t gonna make me feel bad about it. sorry! like yall really be making people feel shitty for wanting the same type of interactions you get! especially when its harmless, bye asf. nb want to recipe to ur peach cobbler b!

the only one giving push back are those appointed popular /top blogs n’ cliques tho. now personally, i honestly dgaf if you have 20 followers or 25k, writing is writing and if its good you should want to support it regardless of following count/interaction right?

unfortunately, and quite unsurprisingly its not the case for the rest of this hellhole lol. there’s always gonna be some “big blog” in any part of tumblr or any social media for that matter.

but when the sole purpose being on a site like tumblr to write is mainly exposure, then it just makes it ten times worse especially if it seems that these blogs are steady at the top of every. single. tag. and listen, i know how initially stupid that sounds but when you’ve picked up on patterns for as long as i have, well iykyk.

so imma be real bc no one else will, half of the posts that yall see with 25k notes have alr been done. just different characters, different words, different dialogue. And 8/10 its been done by sb who only received 100 notes. Thats the evil part. whats more is that it lacks the creativity the one post with 100-300 notes is filled with completely.

POP QUIZ! what post would readers be more inclined to read? — one that says 10k (ohhh that must be popular!) or the one with only 150 (oh i guess nb really liked that one) that no one is even willing to reblog for MORE. and BOOM. now yall wonder why so many great writers LEAVE, its a fucking joke.

so unfortunately its no longer only about or only on readers anymore. its about who you know and who you know is willing to support your fr. who is willing to REBLOG your fics for their friends and followers, so that their friends and followers can reblog. to fit in you actually have to get in these days and it makes it all less enjoyable. makes it a chore and if you aren’t ‘doing it right’ ultimately it makes you feel shitty about your writing. (Please don’t, you are doing amazing. its the platform.)

it makes people not want to jump into writing. it pushes away those who actually want to join writing communities and meet people without feeling like they have to jump thru hoops to thrive or worse—live in other ppls shadows. and then it deters those from speaking up in fear of being shut down by bigger groups. ive seen it happen time and time again.

lastly, and this is the juiciest part! you absolutely cannot say anything about any of this bc you’re complaining and a fisher just looking for attention and not someone who just want things to be fair all over. play the game, right? ( wrong. and if this is your logic, you suck! )

its no longer about making flashy banners and pretty themes. its no longer about how many clever directory links you add or how many games you initiate on your blog or whether or not you’ve reblogged your fic three times already. its about your “friends”, other mutuals, and blogs willing to support you too. not just the audience. audience gonna do what they want regardless. reblog, don’t reblog, whatever. “at least ive read it right?” but everyone knows this. duh! but it’s obvious who doesn’t care as long as they’re on top of that tag! its admirable in a way but it sucks for those wanting to break out and build some kind of readerbase and/or make friends.

TLDR; people need to stop being bias and be fair and open lol. stop picking favorites and share the love all around. you see another person writing your favorite character or trope, give them a fucking chance and reblog, regardless if they’re in your ‘circle’ / radar or not. regardless if you know them or not. hell, let them put you on to a new fandom. bc writing is writing and making new moots and finding new fics seem to be what everyone loves to showcase until its time to actually do it. no wonder people get discouraged to make friends and write, yall treat it like some kind of secret society when its supposed to be fun💀 not a competition. (yall need to dead this clique-y shit. )

#writers #writers of tumblr #WATCH EVERYONE SKIP OVER THIS DHDHDJDN #OH OH OH #and im black #LMAO THATS THE PUNCHLINE #so #all of this isnt only happening in a general writing fandom #but the little corner for my black people??#and in the corners of other minorities #IT HAPPENS HERE TOO DHGSGJG #nb is safe🙅🏾‍♀️#i thought we were escaping exclusivity?#and assumptions made about other people??#trust when i say this is NOT about anyone specific #just silly little observations #and pieces of my experiences #so any complaints #SHOVE IT SHOVE IT SHOVE IT!#will delete if this starts a revolt #or not bc i love chaos in the name of truth #i hope yall can feel the sarcasm this is kinda longer than i intended but i wanted to be as thorough as possible in my point #been working on this for a min #im not tagging as discourse bc this isn’t what this is #and if you treat is as such imma just assume you’re exactly who im talking about and keep it pushing🤷🏾‍♀️#just be better is all im saying #BYE I JUST CAUGHT SO MANY MISTAKES #the shame #i was caught up #but yall get it

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mouserdiscourse · 7 months

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i Still don't understand the urge to label oneself anti endo and then act confused when no one is willing to listen to you. like be for real. If you saw someone call themself Anti [Your Identity Label] would you immediately invite them to a civil debate with you and seriously consider their opinion or would you immediately get defensive and assume they're a bad faith troll or bigot. genuinely.

if you saw someone call themself "anti-traumagenic" would you react poorly? I know i probably would. would you think it's acceptable if they clarified "oh i think theyre real, i just call myself that because i think their COMMUNITY is HARMFUL" would you be any less put off??? would you even accept that reasoning or would you say "no you're just ableist"???

so can we at least agree to stop acting Shocked when a group of people is angry at a community of people labeled "anti-[group]" because it just makes you look silly. im not saying you cant be critical of endos, im not even saying dont call yourself anti-endo. Im saying that if you DO willingly identify with that label and apply it to yourself, you look kind of silly when you then go "um? Why wont you LISTEN to me? Clearly you're in an echo chamber" as if youre not basically wearing a big graphic tee that says "I Don't Respect You"

(Im aware some people get called anti endo when they really arent, this post is not about you, on account of specifically being about self-identification, so please don't start. and if you id as anti endo out of SPITE, i have to ask.. do you do that with other labels? ... like, do you unironically start identifying as homophobic when people accuse you of homophobia for example? Do you think that's a compassionate or rational response?)

#syscourse #unrelated to current events idk what's going on in the tag anymore and idc its getting used as a personal syscourse musing tag for me now #sorry if i revive old discourse doing this but i also really dont care anymore rehashing old talking points is what seems to happen here #in any case this thing Still makes me laugh when i see it #rolling up to pride in my GAY IS SIN shirt and acting confused when everyone is mad at me

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horrorjunki3 · 1 year

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I really liked your drunk headcannons for the Sawyer brothers! Do you think you could do one for getting high? Or is that too similar

Warnings: Canon typical violence, Drug use, discussion of Mental illnesses (PTSD, Schizophrenia for the twins), NSFW, fluff and cannibalism

A/N: sorry if this took to long, I'm currently hyperfixating on Outlast lmao

The sawyer brothers stoned

Since most of them canonically don't smoke weed I'm headcannoning that they're S/O is a stoner bc I'm a stoner and I wanna get my boys high okay? 🥺

Drayton sawyer

It'd take some time for him to smoke with you or get high in general -> and isn't done often probably after he wins a contest or in preparation to calm him down

Omg so (depending on the strain) he loves cooking when high, I think his prefered method would be a joint - and his a lightweight two hits and his high

He gets sleepy and relaxed to so he will grab you by the waist and and cuddle you while he cooks

His more calm and relaxed doesn't get mad or bring the broom out -> which the boys love (he never uses the broom on his S/O ever. Sorry I just really wanted to clarify that)

He gets really sappy and coos at you soft and runs his hands up and down your body and kisses your neck

He gives you PDA and his brothers are like wide-eyed in shock because they've never seen this side of their brother

Speaking of affection he gives this affection to his brothers to!! It's starts with him like ruffling bubbas hair and thanking him for all the help which causes bubba to hug him -> drayton laughs and chop will jump I'm because he loves his lil sibling soo much and Nubbins sits there all awkward until you grab him and drag him into the family cuddle!! It's very soft and unexpected but you and Drayton are like they're parents and they melt into the rare soft moment in the house

His filter kinda disappears? Like he tells you everything he loves about you, his more open to talking about anything and will open up about alot

He will drag you into the loungeroom and watch a movie with you -> he snuggles into you and falls asleep pretty fast.

Chop top Sawyer

Out of everyone Chops the first to smoke with you - Weed helps with PTSD so I dont think he'd have any negative reactions -> this is probably the reason he smokes

His perfered method is using a bong -> he covers it in stickers and loves shot-gunning with you -> idk if that's the term for it, but it's when people blow smoke into your mouth

He gets the munchies and like it's kinda gross but I love him anyway -> he likes eating headcheese and eyes (lmao no I'm not joking, it was either a headcannon or cannon fact that Nubbins eats Eyeballs like grapes and now I headcannon that these are snacks for the fam)

Whenever he gets high he listens music on low volume and likes dimmer lighting -> gets very romantic and phsyically affectionate which often leads to a sloppy make out

NSFW headcannon

Choptop becomes so soft and sensual with you -> he will kiss you softly while he fucks you muttering how much he loves you

Fucks you deep and slow while looking in you eyes -> usually in these moments he doesn't care about the sex it's just how he expresses his love for you

He also giving head when his high, legit moans at the taste and comes untouched -> during these times he refers to you as morsel or meal telling you how good you taste and how he wants to devour you -> there's no threats or violence behind his words he just loves you so much

Nubbins Sawyer

Nubbins would be pretty open to it, I don't know much about how Schizophrenia and weed react I know it can be used to treat mental illnesses -> I'm just assuming that they're won't be any bad reactions for our baby

His preferred methods is a joint or pipe he likes to smoke outside and has cool little spots he likes to show you

Nubbins gets really creative when his high, he will take so many photos, or work on projects

He loves when he gets to involve his you in his photos will beg you to do a photoshoot with him!

Often times he will go to the bathroom and disappear for an hour when you find him his kinda snuggle up with bubs and they're crafting together it's very cute!

He gets so cute when his high becomes more gentle/submissive? Really enjoys just laying with you and cuddling, please let him be the little spoon and play with his hair. He becomes pretty clingy and will curl around you -> please coo at him and call him a good boy

He likes to hold your hand and sit in your lap just let him be held and loved please!

NSFW Headcannons

Nubbins gets really horny, submissive and needy during this time - his a whining, begging and whimpering mess -> it feels so much better when his high he gets drunk on pleasure and generally will want sex until he can't cum anymore he loves when you take the lead during these times.

Please ride him or fuck him he doesn't care he just needs to cum please

Loves cockwarming during this time -> if your warming his cock he will moan about how warm and tight you are and if his cock warming you his a mess and unfortunately it doesn't last he need you to fuck him into the bed

Exhibitionism/voyeurism is a kink of his that shines during this time -> mainly when you guys are outside, he moans about how you feel so good someone's gonna hear, oh how he wants someone to watch him get used by you, please he wants someone to see him being a good boy!!

Bubba sawyer

Bubba surprisingly enjoys weed, he trust you and enjoys the warm bubby feelings he gets from being High -> he prefers edibles

He gets giggly and silly! They will laugh alot and loves picking your up during these times!

His fave thing to do when his high is to hang out with you and their chicken, cuddled up in his bed!

They fall asleep really fast when High - it's really lovely, the cool nip of the night with a chicken on your check and bubbas soft snores next to you? Such a soft and snuggly night!

Bubba prefers not to have sex when his high, it's intense and a little overwhelming instead he'd perfer to kiss you and snuggle -> they take they're mask off during these times and shower you in kisses

#slasher simp #slasher x reader #texas chainsaw massacre #chop top sawyer #nubbins sawyer #robert sawyer #chop top x reader #bubba sawyer #leatherface x reader #nubbins x reader #drayton sawyer x reader #drayton sawyer

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wasyago · 9 months

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okay um

riptide spoilers for the recent episodes!!!

I dont usually write theories and stuff but i haven't really seen anyone talk about it (maybe i just missed it), and i need to get these thoughts written down because my mind is going a million miles per hour and its driving me crazy.

(Also i guess, disclaimer, im not a patron so the last ep i saw was 108, and i don't know any of the information shared in rolled.)

So. This team of strong pirates, Captain Widow, they're turning the Dread Queen into a lich, right? Like, that's the only logical solution i can think of. They're talking about the Dread Queen obtaining power over life and death, which is like the main lich thing - immortality and the ability to be both dead and alive at the same time. They're performing a long complicated ritual, which is also necessary to become a lich, and that ritual requires a lot of sacrifices and feeding energy and nutrients to the Dread Queen. (And, i apologize, all my knowledge about liches comes from Pointy Hat's videos, but i think they're pretty good to base a theory on).

From what i can recall and what i relistened to: no one knows anything about the Dread Queen, Shadowbeard has never talked about her, in the newspaper about the Lords she was just a silhouette, in the memory Jay got from the Black Sea all they said is that they needed to find her corpse in order to make someone a pirate lord (which clarifies nothing), Drey thought she and all the rest of the Pirate Lords were dead. From what we know about the Lords, Rose dissappeared in the hole in the sea accident. According to Lizzie's words, a couple years ago two more of the Pirate Lords went missing, which are the Dread Queen and our boy Hendrix (which we know is hiding in his pocket dimension). And then Shadowbeard was murdered by Ava in the Shadow Scull Masacre.

As we know from Zamia, the Dread Queen's crew didn't disappear but instead came to the black sea and took over an island. And because there's no contact with the outside world from the black sea, and because Navy freely allows pirates passage there, its fair that the world thought the Dread Queen was dead. And this lack of contact and no Navy activity is probably why the Dread Queen chose the Black Sea as a place for her lich ritual. No one will know about it and no one will interfere, no one will stop them from taking over an entire island and killing it's emperor and doing whatever dark magics they want.

Im not sure why they picked this island specifically. Whether its because of the Great Tree (tm) that is "the way of life and connects every corner of the island and gives it life" and probably has a lot of nutrients for the ritual in it. Or for any other reason, maybe it was just the first island they saw, maybe they just wanted a cool castle, maybe because it's the capital, i don't know but I'm sure there's a smart reason.

Gardeck The Scull Crusher aka the minotaur guy did say that their captain is blessed, and its the reason why death is temporary to them, which is one of the details that confuses me. Because first, who is he referring to, the Dread Queen or Captain Widow, both are technically captains. And second, if he is talking about Widow, then uhhh, how? If he's talking about the Dread Queen and if she is undergoing a lich ritual, (and becoming a lich would grant her the power to freely revive people), then how is she able to cast spells while in a cocoon and probably unconscious and probably not yet a lich?

Uhhh don't know how to end these things but that's all i got for now. Also HUGE respect to Grizzly for coming up with all this and connecting so many things and parallels. Because some of the information comes from as far back as episode 32, and its still relevant and accurate and comes up in the plot now, and oh my god.

#jrwi riptide #jrwi spoilers #jrwi riptide spoilers #riptide spoilers #i think im gonna start actually writing these text posts with all the theories and questions i have #because its quite hard to only ask it under art posts. i can't draw stuff relevant to all the questions i have #umm yeah. so. more text posts incoming i guess #also if you wanna talk about it or tell me something or share your theories that'd be fun!!#and its likely that patrons are sitting there having watched the next ep already and laughing at my silly theory #but who cares man im having fun. relistened to a bucnh of episodes trying to find all the info about the dread queen and it was super cool #yagotalk

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darkcircles4lyfe · 4 months

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hi hello ive just come from your enneagram 9 izuku post and i am just OVERWHELMED with joy & excitement after reading it, everything you said just feels so RIGHT!!

(i am a nine myself & have always felt weirdly attached to izuku in that he felt soso similar to me in such a weirdly specific way but i couldn't really explain why i just Got Him until now, so thanks for that little boost of validation lol)

with your post in mind, i couldn't stop thinking about this line from 412 and it got me curious if you had any additional thoughts on it/read it the same way i did:

the moment i read this line i immediately took a screenshot & filed it away in my Important Izuku Moments file, like idk! the wording of it, the way he's talking about shigaraki but could SO easily be talking about himself, that honestly devastating panel of the tears in his eyes...

we've gotten plenty of hints about izuku's emotional suppression (that 'heroes dont cry' scene with iida & todoroki, his flashback of all might telling him to 'stop being such a cry baby' during the afo fight, the whole 'control your heart' plotline...) but THIS line in particular feels so significant for some reason. maybe cause this could easily be izuku recognizing himself in/through shigaraki? maybe bc it is so close to izuku acknowledging the lid hes put on his own sad & lonely past? maybe bc this is the closest we've ever gotten to izuku saying i'm not okay, even if he isn't actually talking about himself yet?

im trying really hard not to ramble too much in your inbox lol, but everything you said in your post about tomura & izuku really hit home for me, i think you're so right about them. and this line in particular is what makes me think we really are going to see some version of tomura being the one to finally break through (Decay) izuku's emotional blocks & barriers (something something locked door imagery), and that just makes me really excited. for both of them :')

YAY!! I’m so glad to hear you resonated with it. It’s otherwise a bit of a “if you know you know” sort of situation, and it felt good to actually explain it.

I had a “!” moment with that panel too, and also when he says he’s determined to break through Tomura’s barrier, expose and acknowledge his pain.

My immediate thought was, “Oh hey, I’m definitely not making this shit up after all, because Horikoshi is obviously intending to confront the concept of bottling up your emotions/your past. He literally just stated it. We're on the same page.” While it didn’t directly confirm anything about Izuku, it's at least something he is aware of, which is an important first step. There's a line in Sleeping At Last's 'Nine' that I was thinking about a lot as I was writing the latter part of that post: "I'm just trying to find myself through someone else's eyes," which speaks to a need for Tomura to be Izuku's mirror, so that he can see himself.

Also, the revelation that Izuku is clinging to the idea that everyone has a "human heart" deep down is pretty clearly applicable to himself too, implying that he's dealing with a lack of self worth (a lot of Japanese fans were talking about this, and I think it doesn't come across as easily in English). I really love how Kudou clarified that Izuku is not naive for this. It's not the same as being blissfully ignorant to how cruel people can be. It's more like, "I need to believe in the worth of others or else I can't believe in myself." That's... so painful and beautiful.

I'm also excited for what comes next! Very soon!

#asks #lin answers #bnha manga #boku no hero acedamia #my hero academia #mha #midoriya izuku #shigaraki tomura #bnha 412

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hofftrans · 3 months

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Getting real comfortable unfollowing and/or blocking blogs that only use political activism as a way to give themselves a feeling of like moral hierarchy. Like I think it's something we all struggle w to an extent, there's this long held concept of "I can only feel that I am good if I have someone bad to compare myself to" and in a terrifying world with so many terrible, terrible things going on in it I so understand the desire to be sure in the knowledge that you are a good person.

But part of kindness and community and compassion is being able to communicate patiently and empathetically with others, and so often I see posts or tags on this site that could be incredibly informative and create real change if they weren't written like somebody trying to get a mic drop moment instead of trying to get people to change and grow.

This is not to say minorities need to or should be polite to their oppressors, that's absolutely not the message of this post and I wanna clarify that to avoid a "love pancakes = hate waffles" situation.

The message of this post is about the amount of posts on here that bring up any issue in the world at all and phrase it as "not that any of you give a shit" or "and no one fucking cares" or "reblogging this is literally the least you can do" or "but I know you'll just ignore this so fuck you"

Like idk I just feel like we've accidentally recreated protestant values and catholic guilt over the idea of actual change, as well as the dangers involved in like "you should know to do the right thing because you're SCUM IF YOU DONT" instead of going "here's some education or a way to help" and then responding that way once someone refuses growth or change.

I'm going to try and practice what I preach here by explaining one of the reasons I think this is so dangerous without insisting you're a monster for not knowing: a large amount of the population suffers from obsessive compulsive disorder, and one of the major ways ocd can present itself is ocpd or as my mates and I have come to call it "ethical ocd." Ethical ocd (in vague terms bc I'm not a doctor) is the extreme anxiety/fear/obsession over being morally wrong or a bad person and sufferers often feel the need to prove absolutely that they are good and can often feel the need to self harm or partake in dangerous behaviour if they make any mistakes or have an intrusive thought of a violent or hurtful nature. I know this because I've suffered from this a lot throughout my life, and as a teenager I spent many years away from tumblr due to how the moral hierarchy culture here was just like pouring fuel directly onto an open bonfire. This is obviously an issue many people don't know about and I get that, I feel no judgement towards them for that. I'm just pleading with people to consider whether their activism on here is coming purely from a place of actually wanting to help people improve their behaviour and improve the world we live in or if it comes from a much deeper need to feel sure and right in yourself, which again is not something that is a moral failure or makes you a monster, just something I really hope people can get help with before it spirals into a more and more harmful behaviour

#sorry for the length of this post im just getting a bit tired and sad seeing the amount of people on here who are fighting for good causes!#but are doing so with the exact same energy my RE teacher gave when she told me if i did something hurtful i would BURN IN HELL #instead of explaining to me that the thing i was doing hurts other people and trust in that first instance that i as a humam being want to #do the kind and right thing without being threatened or shamed into doing so

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