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#its something i dont want to be bothered by... so usually im not
lilsisdolly · 23 hours
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yandere nearing the breaking point, a wild babble of degradation and worship co-existing in the same person - directed towards you. a little bit of smut but not much. dubcon elements, not going all the way.
He looked at you with wild and psychotic eyes, a dry laugh escaping his throat as he looked at your terrified form writhing right in front of him. "Youre scared of me, really?" His voice cracked. "After everything ive done for you! Ive done this for you! I took care of you! Ive did everything, everything, everything for you! And thats the thanks I get?" As he continued to talk his words got angrier and angrier, but he still had enough self-control to tame his voice enough that neighbours would not hear. He had cornered you in your own flat, instantly pushed you inside when you opened him and shut the door behind him.
"Why did I even bother to hold back? Why did I cherish you so damn much? I practically... worshipped you! And thats what I get?!" The look in his eyes started to really freak you out, so you turned around and started to run away - into another room, which had been a huge mistake, and only seeked to provocate him worse. And best of all he had caught up to you in about three seconds. "Youre everything to me.." He whispered as he held you in his tight grip. "But I dont have to treat you that way.. If thats the thanks I get. I can betray my feelings for you." He pushed you to the ground. Towering above you now. The pain the fall had caused was dulled by you recognising just how trapped you were in this situation.
He pushed his foot to your chest as you sat up and forced you into a lying position. Then he took the foot from you, and simply looked down at you. "I want to hurt you so badly right now, you have no idea.. my dear. I want to make you feel what youve just done to me. How your behaviour has truly and deeply hurt me.. I want to treat you like a dirt cheap whore.. but my dear.. youre still so special to me, youre everything, everything, everything. So ill give you a chance to make this easier for you, okay?" He now knelt down next to you, gently stroking your cheek and giving you a soft kiss to your forehead. "If you show me youre scared of me.. ill start to punish you.. and if you can atleast.. hide.. it from me.. do your best to play along.. ill make what comes next feel good to you. How about that?"
He looked at you with a feigned smile, trying to give you a taste of what him behaving would possibly look like. As you did not answer him, he sighed "Answer, my darling." "N-no im not okay with this.." He looked at you like you were truly stupid. "Fine have it your way." He then climbed on top of you, your blood freezing in your veins - his teeth sinking into your neck instantly and without warning - so hard you could feel the drops of blood form where he was biting down. Tears in the corner of your eyes. "Im.. Im sorry." You whispered. "Can we try again..?" He took a second, then he stopped biting you and pulled back, looking at you with a cold gaze. "Sure we can. Theres always another chance, my dear. Just like you will always surely give me another chance. As everything ive done, ive done for you." You slowly nodded, feigning understanding just how he asked. You stirred up all the tenderness you could find for him inside of you, its true he had scared you. Terrified you even. But you could acknowledge that in a sick, twisted way he truly believed he was doing all of this for you. Was there any merit in that at all? From that angle he looked like a kicked puppy. A insane, kicked puppy. You eyed his body, that body you so often had fantasized about. That face you so often had considered so beautiful and handsome. How lucky had you thought yourself to be for someone like him to be interested in you? If something seems to perfect.. well.. that usually is because it is, was your newfound conclusion. But you could find some sense of estranged empathy for him. For the person you used to think he was. You slowly extended your hands to cup his face gently, looking at him with what you hoped was a tender stare. He stared at you with repressed anger, but you could also feel him seemingly calming down a little bit. "Youre nothing but a whore, do you know that? Youre nothing. Youll never be anything. Thats how you made me feel. You deserve to feel it so badly..." His voice was shaking, but his eyes showed how torn he was feeling, clearly moved by even that small gesture of yours. "Youre just a lowly.. lowly.. whore." He whispered once more. You started to gently caress his face, continiung to look at him, ignoring all of the insults.
"Youre everything. Youre everything that matters. Youre all that matters in the end. Youre above me. So much above me. So high above me.. that sometimes you dont even notice it when you step on me.." His voice sounded softer now.
He looked down at your face, still sitting on top of you.. his eyes circling your lips like crazy. Then knowing you would not reject him, he bowed down to kiss you - it was a gentle kiss. Then like a wave of hatred went through him he suddenly started to bite down on your lip - but only for a few seconds, then he eased back into that former gentle kiss. It was like he was fighting with himself, struggling to form a coherent path of action.
His hand started to cup your breast.. gently. Then he flinched away without you saying or doing anything. "This would be to much, I get that. Not like this." Then he pulled away and got off from you. He grabbed you by your hand and pulled you up too, then dragged you behind him to the couch. "Lets just cuddle." He ordered. But he was slowly calming down, you did not feel safe yet again, not at all, but he seemed to move away from escalation. You found yourself smothered in his arms and he pressed so tight to you. After a time you found he had fallen asleep. You watched him for a while, then got up and slowly sneaked out of your own apartment and quickly went to a friends place. That tender empathy you had felt for him still stirred up inside of you. But you knew you had to get out. But he never would let you, would he? Despair started to set in.
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theloveinc · 1 year
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Same person as anon abefore! I wanted to ask about any personal rules you have for this blog? (Only if you feel comfortable answering ofc) bc i saw your post about adding thoughts onto other peoples post and had no idea some people dislike that! But it makes sense why it might make others uncomfortable in a way
-curious question from someone who would very much like a moot (only if you want one too :D !!!!)
hello dear friend :) ... yes ofc you can ask!! tho apologies in advance if this is a complicated answer (and i got your other ask too, tho imma save it for tomorrow bc i'm exhousted)...
i actually personally don't have, nor have ever had, rules for my blog.... mostly bc people have their rules broken ALL the time and i just don't want to worry myself w/ accusing askers/followers of doing this or that (can't break any rules if there aren't any), you know?
but also that's pretty easy for me to say bc i don't really have any like... big triggers or icks or things that bother me, either, so like. if i get something i don't want to address ... i just won't lol? tho that rarely happens cuz i want to get to everything even if i CAN'T or don't
as for like... additions to posts, i think everyone has different preferences regarding how one should go about it? so i can't answer for everyone... but asking is def a safe and kind bet, ALWAYS.
as for me, NORMALLY (adding thoughts) isn't something that bothers me! i love seeing what people have to say, esp if they're friends of mine or add acknowledgements to the creator of the post.
but i think what p*ssed me off today is the fact that........ even tho the reblob was most definitely well intentioned, it just felt a little like i was ransacked of my own idea, esp since that blog has way more followers and friends than i do and i felt like people were responding to them rather than like... me/my idea/OUR idea (and we've never spoken either so .... ??? double whammy)
but anyway. i really want to say like, don't be afraid of adding onto my stuff, or doing anything really idgaf, cuz usually i totally don't mind and esp now that we're friends and have chatted!
but now... i guess i can say, in MY case specifically, recognition does go a long way. even just adding a little like... "hope you don't mind if i add to this!" or "great idea!! this makes me think of ___" would make it feel so much better than just reblobbing as if it were your (as an example) idea in the first place to contribute to.
BUT USUALLY I'M NOT THAT PICKY. TODAY WAS JUST :/ bc i felt a little ignored by someone i do admire and appreciate. but please don't stress yourself, whatever happens i'm always happy to forgive<333
but thank you so much for being so considerate, for my sake and everyone's. i hope this wasn't too hard to read, new mootie friend☺️ (fyi, i follow from @virtualizated)
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robotpussy · 3 months
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ganondoodle · 8 months
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reminder that my totk rants are me just rambling about my thoughts, ideas and complaints, im not trying to analyze anything, be smart, be right, debate or convince anyone who likes it that its bad just bc i think its bad or simply dont like the choices made, im literally just spilling out my brain so it doesnt keep haunting me
if you think something makes sense that i think doesnt i, and forgive me for being so blunt about it, do not care why you think it works, my opinion of this game will not change and i am okay with that
you are free to disagree with anything i say of course but i really dont care why, sorry
(sth i said only in the tags before but added now in this edit bc i think its important: its not bc i dont want to hear other peoples opinions and live in ignorance or something, but bc im tired and i PROMISE you i have seen 99.9% of those arguments already)
im not trying to be mean, aggressive or dismissive, but again, these rants are just me rambling with no intention of arguing with anyone, the only reason im still posting whenever i think of something thats bothering me (even if it might be dumb or be disproven in game bc i am not all-knowing and might be possibly misremembering something), and letting those posts be rebloggable/interactable is bc i have been told by quite a few people that they like reading them or that they feel validated in their own disappointment
thats it.
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mydemonsdrivealimo · 2 months
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ik realistically i never got a lot of love for jensen and bryce bc oh my god a queer pairing of color?????? fucking tragic i know but also i like to pretend its just bc they are too complex for the mere cishet choices player to understand 😌 
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scarletiswailing347 · 12 days
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it doesnt feel right giving eclipse!zam anythign other than a necktie and im not sure why...
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munch-mumbles · 1 month
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ive been a little upset about it all night so i need to write out all the things that happened at work today and are bugging me so i can TRY to get it out of my head and actually RELAX bc i just keep pacing in circles around it instead of just accepting it and moving on
#for context i was working frying chicken today. ok so i arrive and literally all the chicken out expires within ten minutes of each other#meanwhile to remake everything takes about an hour 20#tried my best to get everything out and replaced and make sure i have enough of everything and then take my break bc with chicken there are#few narrow windows to take your break in you have very little control over when it is#get back and while im getting ready for my next fry one of the assistant leaders comes back and passive aggressively asks 'everything ok?'#and when i say yeah shes starts saying how shes 'just checking' because apparently i didnt have enough chicken out for her liking and went#on about how we're in a chicken drive (I KNOW. I WORK CHICKEN SHE NEVER HAS.)#etc etc. i just say ok and she leaves#like 20 minutes later she comes fucking back to rag on me again about how i need to choose my break times better and i need to have more#chicken out there as back up (extremely difficult bc there is literally only so much room in the fryers. the batches i usually make already#nearly completely fill them up) blah blah and then when i try to explain how i WAS making pretty big batches people are just snatching them#up fast she keeps trying to walk out the door right away and keeps stopping and looking over her shoulder to just stare at me while i try t#finish my sentence#and she just. doesnt say anything in response when i do finish she just leaves#so clearly she didnt want a conversation she just wanted to rag on me#then later for cleanup the timing of everything just kept lining up inconveniently so i kept having to get in and out of raw cleaning gear#and slowing myself down and i end up having to stay almost 15 minutes late to finish cleaning#during cleaning i have to go grab a key to the back door to take out my trash and this one coworker i have was standing in the way of the#door. i say excuse me and she just stares at me and goes huh?#and i say i need a key and she barely moves out of the way without responding and she has a look like im bothering her#why are you acting like im being douchey. i just need a key. thats something she does a lot she acts like im inconveniencing her by asking#basic favors . ive stopped asking her to help me open the back door (sometimes needed if i also have raw garbage to take out and therefore#cant touch the key myself) for some reason she takes it upon herself to almost completely close the door after i walk out so when i come#back i have to awkwardly use my foot to reach around and pull the door open#ive asked her before not to do it and she just ignored me#GRAH GRAH. and then like i said in my last rb i realized while i was drivign home i forgot to wash a damn pan#im mostly worried about it because ive forgotten a couple times in the past too . in my defense its a pan i personally dont use but it just#gets left behind from first shift sometimes and then second shifters end up having to make sure its clean#im just irritateddd and im mad im worried about it all. its all little things piling up on each other#LOL I WROTE A LOT MORE BUT THE REST GOT CUT OUT IG I HIT A TAG LIMIT. tumblr voice ok dude quit your bitching !!
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guinevereslancelot · 5 months
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is there anything worse than feeling like ur the only one putting any effort into all of your relationships. el oh el
#feels like this with all my friendships tbh#im like the only one ateting conversations individually or in the group chat#im the only one trying to make plans#(except when they make plans without me 😭)#ughhhh im trying not to be insecure and needy but its so hard bc it really does feel like nobody wants me around until they need something#and i cant even talk abt it bc first of all i dont want to upset anyone esp the one living w me rn#but also it feels like im already the one doing all the talking and i did share some personal stuff recently#i want to communicate and keep conversations going and open up bc we're usually all very supportive of eachother and share things#but i feel like im the only one doing that#anyway.#misery#this is a good problem to have compared to most of my life i've never really had close friends before this#its just depressing and upsetting#i was already in a pretty bad insecure place before all the drama lately amd hadn't shared bc i knew it was irrational#but now ita way worse and with everything going on i cant even talk abt itttt#i hate this i hate it#not to be bitter but i've been thinking abt that saying if you want a good friend be one and 🤨#all my friends do is use me honestlyyyyy ✌️🤪#they want a place to stay for free but can't be bothered to talk to me ever or invite me when they make plans with our friends lol#they're always begging me to put together these bonfire parties they like bc i have a nice yard but its a lot of work#and nobody helps me set it up and they begggg me to do it when the weather is bad and i dont want to but i do it anyway#then they exclude me from things#literally lisa simpson they're using you for your pool.gif#i dont even have a pool tho#anywayyy i hate feeling like an afterthought when im in the group and literally no one ever seeks me out unless they want something#and im trying so hard to be a good friend bc im just so glad to have friends but nobody seems to want me around or want to talk to me#and i dont want to be annoying 😭#also im the oldest in the group but not by choice there's just no girls my age in our orbit#my only adult friends are middle aged and the only one im close ish to just moved out of state#anyway im not that much older they're mostly young twentties and im mid twenties
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lovphobic · 10 months
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first meal of the day at a humble 10pm. #adulting
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pizzapizzadickz · 1 year
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I feel a lil bit better today after getting some rest in. I always feel better when I can spend a day at home. I think tomorrow I'll wear my noise cancelling headphones or something so I can chill even more.
...funny how my way to chill is just trying to eliminate all external stimuli
(Pt 1 for description rant)
#diary#personal#i rly wanna book a therapy appointment but im having a rly hard time trying to get myself to do that bc i need to check i can vid call#cuz my computer monitor is broke and havent fixed it yetttt ugh.#i rly feel like researching autism again. idk. i saw a video about communication badges being used at furry conventions#and by god that sounds so fun ;-; like. i really struggle with interaction with others and talking is sometimes really hard.#mainly bc if theres a lot of noise i usually wanna block it out and if i gotta take my earbuds out to comunicate all the time its not fun#idk. i just wish i could go around writting shit out for ppl to read and thats that. no need to speak to clerks or crap.#bc imma be honest. i have a hard time hearing too. like in crowded places. its so overwhelming all the time.#its both a good and a bad thing that im giving myself the permission to be overwhelmed in situations#but its also making it much more difficult to actually be in those situations.#idk. i used to force myself through it. tell myself i like it or whatever. but by god everything just hurts nowadays#like. i dont like leaving my house mostly bc of the sensory overload.#i wonder how things'll change in the future. just how much more accepting will i and society be. i dont know.#but i hope i learn to cope more. bc life is really hard and imma be honest im struggling at best.#idk. i find it so hard to work lately. i love my thoughts. they are so fluid. and just. language doesnt keep up.#everything i say or write isnt quite right. and it bothers me. i sorta wished telepathy existed just soley so i could comunicate#idk maybe someday ill learn sign language. and maybe that could help. but it wouldnt help when im shut down. or having a meltdown#yknow. i find face to face human to human contacr really scary. i worry theyll want to do something and i wont#i worry i wont be able to get across my reasoning as to why. i worry that theyll see just how odd my behaviour can be.#and above all i just sorta worry they wont work with me to meet me halfway. like. im stuck with my family i dont want that with friends too#i hope if i visit them itll be okay. that like. i wont cause a problem or accidentally offend them or something?#idk. i wanna make friends n hang out. but as ive gotten older ive discovered just how much i hate that.#like i saw a rly cool tik tok about how they set up their home for all their autistic friends when they come over.#like. its established you can just stop talking and remove urself if you wanna. and theres stim toys n plushies n shit. and low lighting#and just. that sounds like heaven. i struggle so much in social situations. bc i eventually get tired.#and it makes me feel sorta burnt out/depressed. so itd be nice if i could just remove myself from a stituation whenever.#or just lay my head down on someones lap and silently observe.#i wish i knew what to do when i get overwhelmed in public. bc it happens a lot. and i freeze. and idk what to do.#and ill cry and get overwhelmed and shutdown or meltdown. and i start to aimlessly wander and its sorta dangerous tbh?
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onebookcharacter · 2 years
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bad mental health ramble in the tags don't mind me
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be-good-to-bugs · 2 years
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I wish hatsune miku was real
#the bin#i wish 8 cpuld make the people around me understand how important she is to me and how many songs are important to me#but i feel like im just annoying them by talking about her all the time#i feel like that about all my interests though#i let people talk about what they like so why do i always feel like im bothering them when i tell them about what i like#i guess it doesnt help that my only friend doesnt share any of my main interests#we like watching the same type of youtube videos and like some if the same music and that it#:/ idk how im supposed to meet people at all let alone people who might have interests in common with me#i just wanna show someone my favorite miku songs and talk about how good they are but i dont wanna seem annoying or weird#she ysed to like vocaloid when she was younger and she is who first introduced me to it but she diesnt like it anymore and hasn't for years#she still remembers a lot of them and some songs but almost none if them are the songs i like#and she mainly listened to english covers done by humans cause ahe doesnt listen to music thats not in english#while as.almost everything i listen to is in japanese and the human covers of songs are usually in russian#i wake up everyday and wanna gush about hatsune miku and theres nobody for me to gush to#i just want someone to be happy for me when i talk about loving something even if they dont like it themselves#but i just feel like theyre tolerating me#personal#i always feel bad for posting more personal stuff on this blog but like. if someone who follows me doesnt wanna see it then they can just#not read it. its almost always in the tags so just dont read them? and i also tag them as personal so just block the tag#anyway
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rosedom · 2 months
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AHHHH HELLOOO sorry i usually dont request much, haha this is actually my second request in all of my tumblr story ever but...i saw you decided to write for gaming and i just couldnt resist, i love your writing a lot and i just think its so immaculate hahaa. Could you write an scenario where male reader is stressed from work (imagine he has an important job like a doctor or something whatever you want is fine :)) because he has been working days nonstop, so much that his boyfriend is all worked up and horny for him so when reader comes back he finds himself straddled by him while hes begging for fucking? With cockwarming, breeding kink and cowgirl position. Could that be with Gaming, Lyney and Gorou? SORRY IF IM ASKING MUCH I DONT WANT TO BE A BOTHER😭😭 i just dont know how to request but thanks for reading all of rant. And again, thank you and sorry for bothering😔 have a nice day/afternoon/night!
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"an unnamed player has invited GA-MING, LYNEY, and GOROU to play . . . an apple a day
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✦ㅤㅤ 【 CW 】 dom!top!male!reader, sub!bottom!ftm!characters, vaginal sex & riding, breeding kink + creampies, creaming (lyney), gratuitous praise + petnames .
A/N : aa u are never a bother !! i am SO SORRY this took so long for me to get to, omg . . . but i had sm fun with this (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ)
"do you want to watch, [PLAYER]? press KEEP READING to spectate the match."
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Patient after patient after patient, each one with a more downright stupid trouble than the last. Your day had started with a young man, clearly fresh out of Millelith training, complaining of a tummy ache, of all things! He had clutched his stomach and moaned and groaned, and all you could prescribe him was bedrest. It’s not like you were going to waste medicine—medicine that some people needed—on someone who ached because he didn't eat fucking breakfast. 
The next patient was an older woman, here only for her biannual check up. You'd greeted her, said a sweet, “Good morning, madame,” but all she did was turn her snobby nose up at you and demand you not waste her time.
“Madame, you have a serious—” 
“I know, young man.” You had heaved a sigh, letting her boss you around for the length of her appointment before sending her off with the exact same specifications as last time: take vitamins, get ample rest, stop talking back to people just doing their jobs. (Though, that last one there was merely something you wished you had said.
Too bad the customer—in this case, patient—is always right, huh?)
But, by the end of the day, you wish, instead, that you had simply elderly after elderly; their disrespect pales to the absolute headache that the rest of your patients put behind your eyes, pounding at your skull—bam, bam, bam.
Wham bam-thank-you-ma'am, all throbbing incessantly behind your eyes and making you wanna hurl—except, god, you’re the fucking doctor, and who’s there to take care of him when he’s a little under the weather? You’ve got your boyfriend, of course—your perfect boyfriend, light of your life, apple of your eye, yet he’s home, and you’re here, and you’re bloody exhausted. 
“I need to go home,” you murmur—quiet, lest your own voice make you lose the last of your thin-threaded sanity—, already stripping yourself of the itchy scrubs you wear during the long days. 
“But sir—” the nurse asks, meak, but her voice is still too loud, too shrill for right now. 
You huff. “I’ve worked for fourteen hours.” The tired gruff to your own voice makes you cringe. You can feel the way it tumbles from your chest, rattling you, your overly sensitive eyes and brain and head and fuckin’ everything, at this point. “Refer to the doc on duty, now.” 
The nurse nods, once. “Have a good night, doctor.”
You bid farewell—a kind apology with a promise to make it up to them, to bring them coffee, maybe, or some cookies—, and you take the slow walk home. The sky is dark and the fireflies are out, the gentle glow illuminating the path. With nothing but your own thoughts and the night to accompany you, you feel your headache gradually ease. It throbs, still; but each bump in your skull is gentler, now: it’s easier to ignore. 
Although the porch light is too strong—the lantern bright and attracting the nighttime bugs and moths—, the foyer of your home is dark. Your aching head is grateful for the reprieve—for the silence that envelops you in totality the second the door clicks quietly shut behind you—, but something other than tiredness pulls at your heartstrings: your sweet boyfriend, clad in only a shirt of yours, toeing into the entryway. 
“Honey?” He wipes the sleep from his eyes, softly smiling at you. “Hi.”
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“Ga-ming, honey—” honey, because Ga-ming unabashedly stole the pet name from you, first, “—you didn’t have to stay up for me.” 
As if on cue, his jaw cracks open in a yawn: this, you do not need the lights on to see. Your heart aches with your head, knowing that he had stayed up just for you. “Honey,” you repeat, sliding off your jacket and stepping up to him. You take his waist in your hands, bunching up the shirt he stole from your closet.
“Quit with that,” he murmurs, tilting up his head for a soft kiss. You grant it; but when you go to pull back, to keep the kiss gentle and chaste, Ga-ming presses forward, darting that little tongue out to lick at the seam of your lips; his hips, too, come bumping against yours, pressing into your thigh, pant to skin—
“Ga-ming?” you repeat, breath leaving you in a low huff. “You’re—” bare. 
Utterly, wholly bare: an expanse of warm, slick skin against your clothed leg. “‘m ready,” he mumbles while he takes to mouthing at your throat. His lips soothe you, somehow; it’s a reprieve, a stark contrast, to the pounding at your skull. 
“Ready?” you whisper, tilting your head back, letting your hands guide the steady roll of his hips onto your lap. 
He nods. “Ready for you,” he enunciates as he softly whines. 
Ga-ming—your Ga-ming—, your boyfriend, your love and light of your life: right here in front of you, on you, all needy for you, offering himself to you, wholly ready for the taking. 
“So please,” he continues, his cock dragging heavy across the seam of your pant; “fuck me.”
“Oh, honey,” you murmur; then again, an “oh, honey,” because you’re still half-dressed up in your clothes—though they’re only soft and bland, made to fit under the rough scrubs you had abandoned at the office—, and Ga-ming is naked save for the shirt draping across him, the low hemline covering the absolutely sinful way he grinds down. It’s a dirty move, a down, down, down that gives his sensitive cock friction against your pelvis. 
“Please, please, ‘m ready, I said—” his words abruptly drop off, a high cry in his throat that sends him to hide his overly-warm face in your neck. His skin burns against you, a feverish-hot that makes you chuckle, makes the throb in your head go away, just-so. “I said I-I was ready, so, please!”
You coo, quiet, bumping your hips up once. The jerking motion makes him cry out, but he manages to keep himself upright, right-side up but entirely unmoored on your cock. “Go on then, little lion. Take what you need, yeah?”
Whimpering a quiet, “Y-yeah,” he begins riding you, slow, steady—but slightly off-balanced—rolls of his hips that makes him whine, makes you groan low n’ deep in your chest. You let your hands rest on his hips, the fabric of his shirt falling over your wrists, and gently guide his motions. Once you’ve helped him establish himself, he begins riding you harder, more desperate.
Silent tears—though, are they truly silent, loud as he is moaning out for you?—dribble down his cheeks, falling to his shirt and soaking the collar of it in salty evidence of his abject pleasure. His abdomen is tensing and relaxing and tensing and relaxing again, all in a rapid loop, in and out and in n’ out, and then there’s a fucking bulge right below his navel when he sinks down hard n’ deep on your cock; and you’re sent over the edge at the sight, moaning through your teeth as you fill Ga-ming up with hot, sticky cum.
“Oh, oh—” he cries, grinding down harsh to get all your cum in as deep as possible, deep ‘nuff to breed him— “bred me, bred me so well, oh—” You groan at his desperate babbling as his thighs jerk around your hips, just before they give out on him entirely. He falls bodily into your chest, heaving through his own orgasm as weak mewls tumble from his prettily parted lips. Each sound is smeared into your throat while you laugh, light and breathless, jostling his overly-sensitized body and making him flinch. 
“Sorry, honey.” You kiss at his temple, and, the whole while, his small cunt is left to unconsciously milk your cock, left to assure that loud, insecure part of his brain that he’s wanted, that he’s bred all nice n’ full because he is loved. You’re long done, now, but the undulations make your body warm, soft, safe—just like Ga-ming is, comfy in your lap and wholly protected. “Thank you.”
He shakes his head against you, nuzzling into your throat with a heavy sigh. “You don’t have—hafta thank me,” he mumbles, a lick at your Adam’s apple to seal the deal. “I wanted ta.”
Tucking up the blankets around him, you grin. “Then can you warm my cock, lil’ dragon? Just for me?” You run your fingers lightly up his clothed spine, delighting in the shiver you can feel, one that runs the length of your cock as he’s snug on it. “Since earlier was all about you?” You raise the end of your sentence in a lilting tone, meant to tease, and Ga-ming huffs at you. 
And, n further retaliation, he clenches around you; the soft squeeze—all wet n’ warm, smearing your own cum across the base of your cock and leaving the mess of both of yours to dribble down the minute space between your bodies—forces you to calm your breathing, to take in the delicate scent of what is undeniably Ga-ming mixed with the smell of your own shirt, your own cologne. 
You laugh, then. “‘m sorry,” you say again amidst giggles, ones you’re careful you confine only to your upper chest lest the movement be too uncomfortable on both of your oversensitive groins. 
He doesn't reply, snuggled up comfy on your lap and stuffed full of your cock n’ cum both. Instead, he only noses into your neck further before his breathing steadies, lulling you to sleep, too.
It’s in your final moments of consciousness that you realize your head no longer hurts. 
(You suppose you now have the evidence that, yes, an orgasm is sufficient enough a cure for headaches.)
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Under Lyney’s palm, a small floor lamp clicks silently on. The light is admittedly dim, but, to your sensitive eyes, the bulb is blinding. You cringe and cover your eyes; but it only serves to shield you slightly, because you’re still upright in the foyer, and your body is rather weak. “Lyney,” you tiredly murmur, lifting your palm just enough to see the ground lest you trip. 
You bump into him, laughing lightly, but his worried hands jump to your arm. “Hey—”
“I’m okay.” You’re quick to calm him, placing your free hand on his in a tender gesture as you make way to the living room. “Just a headache, ‘s all. Ya shouldn't have stayed up f’r me.” Earlier, it hurt to even think; but here, with him, the pain is easy to ignore, in the face of his own self destruction.
He grumbles at you, though, says something you can’t quite catch and drops his hands, pads over to the lamp to flick it off. The return of darkness is soothing. 
He smiles at you, then; or, at least, you think he does. It’s difficult to see in the dark, and you can’t strain your eyes without hurting yourself. “I wanted to!” He takes three long strides before he’s standing in front of you, draping his arms across your shoulders. The position makes his (your) shirt ride up on his belly, and— ”I missed you, y’know,” he murmurs, suddenly all soft n’ deep, looking up at you and bumping his forehead against your chin. “A lot, really.” 
“Lyn—” 
He quickly silences you with a kiss. Against your lips, he pulls back, murmurs, “I missed your cock, especially.”
Laughing against him, you lean up ‘til he can no longer reach you. He pouts at you when you reply, faux-snark, “only my cock, huh?” Your bottom lip juts out—a mirror of Lyney’s own, a magic trick of his you took for your own; it’s a devilish trick, one you play right alongside puppy-dog eyes you know he’s soft to. “How cruel.” 
He huffs at you, pulling you down by the collar of your shirt to kiss the mirth off your lips. “I was tryin’ to be seductive,” he grumbles, knocking against your chin and beginning to push you backwards into the living room. “But nevermind!”
You want to say, “Hey, now:” disagree with him and keep on pouting and go, “hey, hey, hey,” all offended, but the backs of your knees come into contact with the edge of the sofa, and you’re well and sufficiently distracted from that idea.
“Sit,” he gently commands you—merely the illusion of choice—, giving you no choice in the matter with the way he’s pressing you down into the cushions. You go easily; you sigh in relief when the softness begins enveloping you—a pillow’s snug right in the middle of your back, and you briefly wonder if Lyney had planned this. He murmurs, “there you go,” quiet n’ soft, and you’re taken by the way this man gives to you. 
He wears his heart on his sleeve, truly; except, right now, the sleeve is yours (just like his heart belongs to you and yours to him in turn), and it's bare, and so is the expanse of his long, pale thighs, the hem of his boxers peeking out beneath the shirt. He stands in front of you, between your legs, makes sure you’re down and that you’re gonna stay down, but your eyes aren’t really tired, not anymore, staring at Luney—your Lyney—before he huffs and sits bodily onto you, straddling your lap with his knees sinking into the cushions on either side of you.
“Lyney,” you murmur, reaching out to take hold of his thighs. The position makes the shirt rise up on his belly, exposing the soft, rippling muscles there; but, in the dark, all you can go by is what you feel against your own stomach, his bare skin pressed to your thin shirt. “I was kiddin’, sweetheart.”
“I know you were,” he snaps at you, mean-like, but he brings his arms around your shoulders all sweetly and nuzzles into the side of your head. “But I wasn’t. I—I really did miss you; and your cock. If you—if you wanna, of course.” 
“Of course I want to, Lyn,” you mutter, tilting your head up to kiss beneath his chin. “I’m just a little tired.”
“A little?” He huffs, again, before sighing. “Just—let me do the work, alright? I’m already...” he pauses, tilts his head to the side, breathes in and out sharply.
You hum at him to go on. 
“‘m already prepped.” Oh. 
“Oh?” You grin, bringing your tired arm up to cup his cheek. He leans into your palm and his eyelashes flutter, brushing against your skin. “Go ahead then, sweet thing.”
And go ahead he does, smiling into you before he abruptly leans back ‘nuff to chuck off the shirt. You whine, say, “hey!” but there isn’t any bite left on your tongue when Lyney starts tugging his boxers down, too. He’s impatient, pulling at the seam and groaning curses at the fabric—as if it’s the damn boxers’ fault that he’s in a position that prevents him from taking them off. 
He relents, tilting this way and that and finally—after painstaking minutes later, ones that, under no circumstance, should be arousing, but the anticipation, the wait: it all makes your dick chub up in your own pants—Lyney’s left naked in your lap. The fabric hangs off his foot, and you reach down to tug it the rest of the way off for your sweet boyfriend as he busies himself unbuckling your own belt, loosening the tough leather enough for your pants to droop and enough for him to reach a hot hand into your briefs. 
“Eager, huh?” you tease, lifting your hips—and, subsequently, him—to let him get your dick out of your pants. Neither of you bother pulling down your own pants, not after Lyney spent so long on his boxers alone. He doesn’t dally. “My sweet Lyney.”
He sighs, again—he’s rather dramatic tonight; but, then again, when isn’t he? It wouldn’t quite be your Lyney without some theatrics—, spitting into his palm and lathering up your cock with it while he makes to straddle you more fully. “Thought you were tired,” he grumbles, hovering his, indeed, wet n’ slicked up and entirely prepped cunt over your thick cockhead.
“Mhm.” You set your hands on his plush thighs once he hooks the head of you into his loosened hole, groaning low and pleased in your throat while he softly whimpers at the barely-there stretch. He prepared himself well. “But when you’re lookin’ so pretty for me, I can’t help being wide awake. Wouldn’t wanna miss this sight for the world.”
With your eyes now adjusted to the light—and, oh, you consider how the throb of your head is a bygone memory now—, you can see the way his cheeks darken just-so, puffed up in exertion as his groin meets yours. You’ve got your cock stuffed up balls-deep in him, and he leans into you once he’s fully settled. 
He moans, less out of outright pleasure and more out of total contentment, comfy and warm on your lap as your arms knead at his thighs. His arms squeeze around your shoulders, and he quietly asks, “Gimme a minute.”
Nodding, you simply bask in the steady heat of him, letting him adjust and recognize that, yes, you’re home, now, and you hadn’t really left him at all. “I missed you,” you murmur rather suddenly, your voice quiet but still stark in the silence of the night. “Thought about you durin’ my shift.”
“You did?” His voice is rough but wispy, a little out-there and entirely gone. He’s slipping into that mindset he always does when he’s left to warm your cock—regardless of if it were by his volition or your own—, but he begins to subtly grind his hips against you, mewling at the hot sparks of rapture from his cock rubbing just right against you. 
“‘Course I did,” you continue, moving your hands to his hips instead to help move him along. His arms tighten around you and he moans directly into your ear.
From then on, it’s quiet: quiet, that is, save from the obscene slick noises of the lube Lyney used to prep himself earlier with his own slick, your pre-cum mixing up and making a mess of thick liquid between both of your thighs. His moans are barely audible, these soft, gentle lil’ uh, uh, uh’s punched out of him with each tender grind down. 
You think, even, that you’ll both cum like this: quiet, nothing but the sounds of your connection and heavy breaths, moans, groans as you fall over the edge. But then Lyney starts bumping his groin against yours even harder, grinding down deep on your cock and rubbing against your full balls, and he starts babbling for you to “breed me! Please—”
“I-I’ll breed you,” you groan, leaning your head back into the sofa cushions and chasing your release, chasing the release you both want, the one he wants so desperately stuffed up deep inside him. “Gonna fill you right up, just like you want, sweetheart.” 
He babbles more—a mix of syllables and words, more pleas for you to breed him—until he’s silenced by his own high-pitched whine, cumming around you and slathering you in creamy-white. The steady clench and release of his cunt forces you to your own end, thick cum slowly leaking out from the edges of his cunt and your cock. (You can hardly tell what’s your leaking cum and what is his own.)
“Thank you,” he mumbles, already beginning to doze. “Th’nk you:” quieter, more muddled against your ear.
You grab the throw you have across the sofa’s armrest, rucking it up around the two of you; you cocoon Lyney safe in your arms and on your softened cock. He’s nodded off, now, and he misses your words: “You don’t have to thank me,” you say anyway, even if he doesn’t hear you, “I love you.”
The cum’ll be sticky, later, when you wake up; but for now, it’s perfect. It’s perfectly warm and entirely cozy, wholly snuggled up with the love of your life. Your headache, the stressors of the day—they’re all forgotten in his presence. 
You’re so, so glad to love him. 
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“Hi, puppy,” you coo. The sound of your own voice grates you, but you ignore it to sweetly smile at your beloved. He stands there, motionless for a moment right there at the threshold before the foyer, until he shakes his head with a barely-there laugh. “Gorou?” 
He tilts his head to the side—this you can see, the silhouette of him in the moonlight—before he takes a tentative step forward. 
Then another. And another. Another, another, another, ‘till he’s standing in front of you and leans up to kiss your jaw. “Hi,” he repeats, voice ruff (hah!) and hoarse, a little too much so. “Missed ya.”
You tilt your head back to let him mouth at you, and your hands subconsciously come to clutch at his hips, and— “Oh, Gorou,” you mumble, pleasantly aghast, because your hands come into contact with bare, slick skin. “Pent up?”
With a quiet whimper, he tilts his hips forward, into you, pressing against the contact of your fingers on him. You slowly slide your one hand around, sneaking a large handful of his ass before you dip into his cleft, shuddering when your fingertip easily glides across his slicked, open cunt. 
“I-I wanted you, so bad,” he starts to mumble, shy, tucking his head into the meat where your shoulder meets your neck. Without any prompting, you adjust your stance, pressing your knee into his cock and making him jerk forward with another whimper high in his throat. “Oh!”
Slowly, his hips begin grinding—it’s a weak movement, testing, making sure you're really okay with this, right now. He moves unsure against you until you begin bumping your knee, letting his slick make a mess of your pant leg. “Go on,” you goad him on, soft, holding him snug against you. You can feel his cunt clench even through the fabric of your pants, a rapid rat-a-tat-tat against you that is oddly reminiscent of the headache you can feel begin to dissipate. “Take your pleasure, pup.”
He nods vehemently against you, beginning to hump as his tail swishes side to side, side to side, hypnotizing you just slightly. It’s hard to parse it out in the dark, but the shadow of it is undeniable behind him. Each bounce of your leg makes Gorou whimper, and he’s quick to crane his neck up for a kiss to muffle himself. You grant his request easily, but only for a minute; after, you gently part from him to murmur, so quiet that only he could possibly hear, those big, soft ears of his twitching as he strains, “What else do you want, honey?” 
“Want you,” he whines, grinding harshly once, twice. “Want you inside me, want you to breed me.” 
You didn’t expect that, but you’re a doctor, after all; it’s kinda in the job description to roll with the punches, so you do. “You wanna get fucked full of pups?” you ask, teasing and light, but Gorou’s mouth parts as a loud whine crawls out of his chest.
“Yes! Please.” Thick tears begin to drop from his eyes, saltwater dribbling onto the bare skin of your throat. “Now, now—breed me now,” he begs, and you coo at him, bringing your hands to curl into his hair, rubbing soothing circles into the base of one puppydog ear. 
“Patience, pup.” 
And, because he’s Gorou, and Gorou is nothing but a good boy, he nods, rapid-quick movements of his head, and begins to slow on your thigh. Heat shimmers low in your belly as he steps back from you on shaky legs, a wet splotch across your leg from his cunt. You bring a hand down, meaning to scoop it up off your pant, but your finger brushes two distinctly different textures: his natural slick, and fuckin’ lube. “Did you prepare yourself for me?”
“Y-yeah,” he mutters, tail tucking itself between his legs. You almost cringe at that, knowing he’s smearing himself into his own fur, but if he doesn’t mind, then you won’t either; besides, it’s hard to truly care when your boyfriend is so bashful in front of you. “I—I missed you, ‘nd wanted to be ready for you.”
The image of Gorou, ass up on the bed with four of his fingers stuffed up inside of himself flitters across your mind, makes your cock throb in your britches. Your erection was easy to ignore, earlier; but now it’s abject torture. 
However, it’s not nearly as torturous as it was for your boyfriend, and you know this. You know he didn’t cum, know his fingers are far too short to truly reach in deep and press against his g-spot, know his wrist can’t comfortably bend to jerk himself off and finger himself at the same time. So you coo, soft, “Sweet boy. Where’s your toy?”
“Charging,” he mutters. 
You grin at that: it’s perfect. “Can you go get it then, puppy?” 
With an audible swallow, he nods, rushing for your bedroom. You follow behind him, lethargic but so, so turned on; and while he’s grabbing the vibrator from the corner, you shuck off the rest of your clothes and plop yourself down on the edge of your bed. 
He must not expect you to have followed him, however, because once he turns around, he jumps, ears flattening to his head in embarrassment. You only laugh and pat your lap. “C’mere.”
Quickly—and toy in tow—, he shuffles over to you. He stands awkwardly in front of you for a moment before you murmur, “I said c’mere,” and tug him to straddle your lap. The position immediately forces his cock—slick n’ thick, out of its hood and throbbing incessantly—against yours, and he mewls helplessly for a moment, grinds once, twice again, before he grabs the lube to the side of you. 
You hadn’t even noticed it there, but now that he’s grabbed it, pointed it out, you feel other wet spots beneath you. He fuckin’ masturbated here, right on the duvet you both sleep under, thinkin’ about you and only you. You’re taking out of your musings when he slathers up your cock in lube, messy and sloppy, and then he’s rising, positioning you, and sinking right on down.
“Mm!” he cries out, swiveling his hips to take you in deeper, deeper, deeper. You groan at the lube-slick combination that smothers your cock in Gorou, Gorou, Gorou. “Breed me, breed me!” Each meak plea makes your cock pulse inside him, and he mewls at each throb inside him. “Please!”
“I got you, pup,” you murmur, your edge so close you can taste it on the tip of your tongue. “Just make yourself feel good, and I’ll breed you, okay? Okay, puppy?”
“Okay, okay—” 
You grin. “Good boy,” you say, and then he’s tumbling over the edge and bringing you right down with him. You groan into his throat, feeling the vibrations of his whimpers n’ whining moans as he’s getting thoroughly bred. Your hands ruck up his shirt to hold his sides and soothe him down from his high. “You did so good for me, sweetheart. Bred you just like I promised I would, hm?”
He weakly nods. “Thank you,” he mumbles, nosing at your throat. 
And, well. You’re bloody exhausted, and you promised to breed him, and he can’t keep on being bred if you pull out. You tell yourself you’re only upholding your promise as Gorou falls asleep on your cock, breathing deep on your lap: tell yourself that it’s the lingering tiredness that suddenly seems to hit you in full-force that keeps him warm and snug on you. 
Really, clean-up can wait. 
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i got a lil' carried away on lyney's part ,, o(*^@^*)o also, none of these were really cowgirl 'cos reader was sitting up for it . . . i couldn't think of how to have him lay flat in these scenarios LOLL
13 MAR. 2024, @rosedom, rosey .
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duodusk · 2 years
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hi eveyione ^-^
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zeldasnotes · 4 months
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𝖆𝖘𝖈𝖊𝖓𝖉𝖆𝖓𝖙 𝖔𝖇𝖘𝖊𝖗𝖛𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓𝖘 🪽
This post contains both natal & synastry observations!
These are my personal observations based on people Ive met and celebrities and are not to be taken as facts. The rest of the chart has to be taken into consideration so not everyone will relate.
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• Having Saturn and Neptune both aspecting the Ascendant is perfect for a model. The Saturn effect makes the model look cold and untouchable. But the dreamy Neptune effect makes the onlookers delulu enough to think they might be able to look like the model too if they buy the product the model is wearing.
• Ascendant ruler in the 10th house people makes someone come across as authoritative.
• Capricorn Risings wants to come across as somebody with high status. Might like to wear their work uniform or ”the original” and ”timeless” brands. The kind of people to wear their stethoscope and white coat on their profile pic.
• Mars Square Ascendant can have this tense ”you better watch yourself” look.
• When your Lilith conjunct someones Ascendant they might represent everything you just cant be with. Huge age difference seems to be the most common theme here but also different religions especially if Lilith is in Sagittarius. If Juno is involved yall might make it work anyways but if not it can be secret relationship. Ascendant person feels like the Lilith person see right through them.
• Bella(695) conjunct Ascendant shows up a lot in the charts of beauty queens. Both Vanessa Williams and Priyanka Chopra have Bella conjunct Ascendant and Priyanka won Miss World and Vanessa won Miss America.
• Ascendant ruler conjunct the Ascendant seems to give a very strong personality and presence. Both Madonna and Beyonce have this.
• Ascendant Ruler in the 2nd house = making money bc of your looks. Ex. Pamela Anderson.
• Ascendant ruler in the 2nd house or vice versa might change their look a lot when they get money. Might like to spend money on their looks. Kylie Jenner for example have her 2nd house ruler in the 1st house.
• Venus/Ascendant usually have a beauty mark, very often beside the eye or the Marilyn Monroe mole.
• One of the easiest ways to recognize a venusian ascendant is the lips. They seem to often be heartshaped, a prominent cupids bow or just a very soft and plump look. Pouty mouth.
• Ascendant Ruler in the 9th house might have a look that you see instantly where they come from or the opposite. Might get a lot of questions about their cultural background.
• Someone with planets conjunct your Ascendant in synastry will make sure you notice them. Because they sure as hell noticed you and you better reciprocate or they will start acting all rude to get your attention.
• Pluto conjunct Ascendant in the Fama(408) Persona Chart makes you THAT bitch. Makes me think of the lyrics ”you know im the face of the city bitch, thats what you mad”
• Lilith aspecting the Ascendant can make someone look very ”goth” even if they dont even have that style.
• Pluto conjunct Ascendant liked to hide and protect themselves which is seen on how they style themselves. Might like sunglasses, a lot of makeup, a lot of tattoos, wearing a cap, military clothes, walking around with a bulldog.
• Dainty(9758) conjunct Ascendant makes someone look so delicate.
• Air Ascendants seems to just know everyone.
• I cant stand Venus Square Ascendant in synastry. Im a Cap Rising and so many Aries Venuses said I was boring and too serious. I know its true but the Cap Venus guys love it. The issue with this aspect is that there seem to be some kind of attraction but at the same time something bothering the Venus person. And if the rest of the synastry is good it can make Venus want to still be around Asc but still be bothered by them. And I cant stand relationships where you only ”half” like eachother.
© 2023 Zeldas Notes All Rights Reserved
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virmillion · 2 years
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tag rants
#we are once again thinking abt the process of coming out and typing it helps bc then i can go back and reread it#and notice the typos i missed in the process but skip that for now#so like. for some reason i have this HUGE urge to come out this summer and i have a few theories#the first and most realistic (hello occam) is that ive known since probably eighth grade that im Not cishet. like ive known i was Something#(read: not like other girls syndrome) but i never knew *what* i was. i didnt know if i was ace or liked girls or was a girl or was nothing#or whatever. i didnt know what i Was. i only knew what i Wasnt (cishet). now i know (like. 98% certainty. theres some shifting but im pretty#solid). anyway i Know now that im A Boy Who Likes Boys. like i KNOW this. ive done the soul searching ive taken the quizzes i know all of it#and historically i never felt the need to come out because it wouldve been pragmatically pointless. hey mom hey dad im not cishet. i dont#know for sure which part of that im not nor do i know what i Am yet. stay tuned for more details to come#like that would be so dumb lol so it was never a huge issue. i figured like ok yknow once i figure it out for myself THEN we can handle the#parent situation. which was no problemo for past lab because that bitch got to procrastinate it. but now hes ME. rude#so now that i know what i am its frustrating because usually its like. like idk but stick with me here. in coding classes youll be provided#test cases and you have to write functions to accomplish a task. then with the given test cases you test ur code and see what works#then you get past the first test case (basic test or w/e) and move on to more comprehensive ones. then once a given function passes all its#relevant test cases u mentally mark the function as done and move on to another. bringing it back around ive run all the test cases on#who i am and who i want to Do. ive completed the function i know how it works ive gone back and reduced the time complexity and all that#so for me. this is usually where i mark it as done and put it in a Finished Junk box and move on. but the prerequisite for entry into that#box is everyone else Also being aware of the function’s completed state#im not gonna bother asking if that makes sense bc if u read this far its on u to get my point. idk#jesus christ im down to like ten tags uh oh. anyway so long story short yes i want to come out this summer i think#which is a HUGE acceleration to my projected timeline of Hey Maybe Graduate College First So You Arent Financially Dependent On The People#Whose Love And Support Youre Most Afraid Of Losing yk#like. yes i could come out in september or so once ive moved back to campus and can have some space. but for some reason (probably the long#winded and unnecessary metaphor made above) i dont know if i can stand going the Whole Summer without telling them. idk#for someone who doesnt know how to shut up i sure do say idk a lot#once again. did i have a point writing this? no. did it help my brain sort through shit a little better? yeah actually#the ideal would be Talking Verbally to someone but like i said im Home and virtual therapy is very difficult to do covertly#hey lab why are u spending half an hour sitting in ur car outside? oh u know just doing therapy lol 🤪🤪🤪#simply chatting about stuff that might get me disowned or kicked our 🤪🤪 u know how i be!!#ive deleted my labhrambles tag to do this one and say. what the fuck. usually i get to 20 tags max how did we hit the Limit hello??
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