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thebigbadbatswife · 3 years

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The Witching Hour - Chapter 1 - All Hallows’ Eve

Summary - When her friends dragged her to Gotham’s old cemetery for some Halloween ghost hunting fun, Y/N really didn’t think her life would end up changing like this.

Chapter Warnings - referenced/implied character death

Word Count - 3.3k

The cell phone on your nightstand buzzed incessantly as your friends continued to spam your messages. They had been doing so for the past hour or so. You were surprised that the damn thing hadn’t vibrated off of the nightstand yet. When it finally stopped, when you finally thought they had given up, you returned your attention to the document you had open on your laptop. Just as you were about to start typing again, your phone resumed its buzzing.

Huffing, you shut your laptop’s lid, placed it on the bed next to you, reached over and grabbed your phone off the nightstand. Over eighty messages both from your friends individually and within the group chat, begging you to come along with them to the old cemetery that sat outside of town. They wanted to go because it was Halloween and that meant it was the best time to go ghost hunting! And they wanted you to go along because of how you were usually drawn to this type of stuff. As well as how this type of stuff was also usually drawn to you.

Come on! For old time’s sake? Plus we’re going to have a much better chance at actually catching something if you come along!

The message was from your friend John, the ringleader of your group. The reason you and your friends had always gotten into trouble at school. Now he was trying to work his magic once again.

Only because I’m a meta with an uncomfortably close relationship with death…

As far as you knew, your powers were genetic instead of being caused by that arc reactor explosion that had given a lot of metas their powers. You were able to look past the “Veil”, as it was called, and see and interact with spirits on the other side. Not that you did so often or even liked to do. It creeped you out and you sometimes saw things that would certainly traumatize most people if they saw them. Not to mention the strain on your body and mind each time you did it.

Why the obsession with the old cemetery now?

It had been years since John had mentioned ghost hunting, let alone the old cemetery. Back during your last year of high school, it had been all John could talk about. He was convinced that it was where the “cool” ghosts would be hanging out. None of you had ever actually gone because your last year had passed surprisingly quickly and before you all knew it, you were all moving to different parts of the country for college. In all that time it had never been mentioned again. Until now.

Ha! She finally replies! I knew you wouldn’t leave us to scream into the void forever!

The next message was from Tom, your oldest friend. Unlike the others, you two had known each other since kindergarten. If anyone was capable of talking you into going, it was probably him.

It’s been years since all of us were in the same place at the same time! Not to mention it’s Halloween and a full moon! I don’t think it could be more perfect!

Well, he wasn’t wrong about that.

You know you want to come! And don’t you dare lie!

He wasn’t wrong about that either. You were a little curious. The cemetery was on the outskirts of Gotham City. According to the internet, the cemetery had members of Gotham’s oldest families buried there. If you were to use your powers there to look past the Veil, there was a chance some of those people could still be hanging around. It would certainly be an unique opportunity to converse with them and, perhaps, attempt to help move on. Or maybe you would find inspiration for your next short ghost story. You certainly had been struggling with inspiration recently so maybe this was exactly what you needed.

Okay! Fine! I’ll come!

You scoffed as you hit ‘send’. Once again, Tom had talked you into joining them. A small part of you was convinced he was a meta with some sort of manipulation power.

That’s great! ‘Cause we’re already outside your house!

John replied, causing you to roll your eyes. Of course they were already outside. Why wouldn’t they be?

You locked your phone, got up from your bed and slipped your phone into your pocket. You grabbed your jacket from your wardrobe and made your way out of your bedroom and down the stairs. You grabbed your keys from the bowl on the table, near the front door.

“Y/N? Where are you going at this hour sweetheart?” your grandma called from the living room.

“I’m going to meet up with some old friends. I’ll be back soon!” you replied. You didn’t tell her where you guys were going since you knew she would most definitely disapprove.

“Stay safe!”

“Will do!”

After your parents’ death, your grandma had not only raised you, but helped you learn how to use your abilities so that, should you choose to, you’d be able to use them. Not that she would approve of you constantly using them. Looking through the Veil could sometimes draw the attention of extremely unwanted creatures that were looking for a route to the physical world. You knew how to defend yourself from them, but that didn’t mean you really wanted to get into that situation to begin with. If you were going to use your abilities tonight, you were going to have to be extremely careful.

The entire drive there, your friends excitedly talked about what they could potentially capture on either video or audio. John was driving, Tom sat in the passenger seat next to him and you were sitting in the back with Rebecca.

A couple of hours later and the car finally pulled up in front of the cemetery. John turned off the engine and you all got out. Since it was pretty much pitch black out here, you all got out your phones and turned on your flashlights.

Tall stone walls covered in moss and vines surrounded the cemetery and an old rusted iron gate stopped the car from going any further. Threaded through the bars of the gate was large rusted chain with an equally rusted padlock. Even if you guys had the key, you seriously doubted it would have worked anyway.

“Are you kidding me?” asked Tom, as he useless pulled against the chain. “This is so unfair!”

“Uh, maybe we could try to scale the walls or something?” Rebecca suggested as she walked over to where the vines seemed at their thickest. She gave them a gentle tug. “Looks like it might hold our weight, if we go up one by one.”

Tom shook his head. “And get covered in spiders? Yeah, no thanks!”

Rebecca frowned as she used her phone’s light to have a closer look at the vines. “I can’t see any spiders.”

“That’s because you’re not looking in the right spots,” he replied as he walked over to her. He shone his own light up at the vines.

While you walked over to them, to get a better look at what Tom was trying to show her, John shook his head and walked back toward the car.

“See all of those tiny turquoise dots shinning back at us?” he asked her as he pointed above where there were a lot of tiny turquoise dots sparkling in the light.

“Yeah, they’re like little drops of moisture right?”

“You would think, but they’re not! Those are the eyes of all those horrid little spiders!”

Rebecca squealed and immediately backed away from the wall. “Tom! Why the fuck would you tell me that! Fuck! There’s probably going to be so many of them inside the actual cemetery! And now I know how to spot them!”

“I don’t think that’s going to be much of an issue considering we can’t get in anyway,” you said as you gestured toward the very locked gate. This whole thing was starting to feel like a massive waste of time.

“Oh! But we can!” John announced as he strode on over to you three with a large pair of bolt cutters in hand. He also had a backpack slung over his shoulder. As he cut the chain, John explained how he had swung by here earlier to see if there was anything that would stop you lot from getting in. When he saw the chain, he had gone to the hardware store, that was located in the worst part of the city, and bought these. “Only place I could find that had bolt cutters big enough for a chain like this!”

“Aren’t we like breaking the law or something right now?” Rebecca asked just as the cutters snipped through the chain and it clanged against the gate.

“Probably,” John replied very nonchalantly. “But we’re pretty much committed at this point now. Besides, look at this place! No one’s been here in years! I seriously doubt we’re going to get caught.”

The iron gate creaked loudly as it was pushed open and you all headed inside. The others walked ahead while you trailed behind. The way they were talking, discussing who was buried here and therefor who they could potentially “contact”, made you feel like you had time-travelled back to high school.

When you all got to the centre of the cemetery, John took the backpack off and opened it. It was filled with all sorts of equipment that was used in modern day ghost hunting. Voice recorders, emf meters, even a couple of high end night vision cameras. Damn, he had really gone all out for this. After the gear had been handed out, John began to give everyone directions as to where they were off to investigate.

Tom and Rebecca were going to be investigating the southwest of the cemetery, which was the newest part, John was headed up to the north, where some mausoleums were shaded by an old willow tree and you:

“And Y/N, you get the oldest part of the cemetery which is toward the east!”

“Right, of course, send the meta to the creepiest part of this place,” you said, playfully rolling your eyes.

“Well, you said it, not me! Good luck and we’ll meet back here in a couple of hours,” John replied. With that, you all split up and went your separate ways.

The cemetery was vastly overgrown. Most of the headstones were buried beneath the long unruly grass, brambles and vines. Every now and then your flashlight would catch a glimpse of the grey stone underneath. You also caught more glimpses of those glowing spider eyes and were doing your best to ignore them. You really hated Tom sometimes.

Thanks to all of the plants, you could barely see the path. The only thing that indicated you were walking on one was every now and then you could feel a stone slab shift underneath your feet.

The further east you walked, the darker and darker the cemetery seemed to get. It also seemed to get creepier and creepier, which was strange to you because you never really found cemeteries creepy. Instead you had always found them peaceful. A lot of people found you weird for that. There was also the feeling that something was watching you. The uneasiness that came along with that feeling was enough to prevent you from using either your recorder or your abilities. If there really was something watching you, you got the feeling that the last thing you wanted to do was attract its attention. After all, who knew what truly lurked here? Especially on the other side.

You eventually reached a group of mausoleums. Much like the rest of the cemetery, they were covered in bramble, vines and other plantlife. They were tall and the parts of them you could see, you could tell were certainly made of far more expensive stone than the rest of the place. This wasn’t just the oldest part, this was also the richest part.

You approached a few of the mausoleums and managed to clear away some of the plants covering the name plates. The majority of the names had been erased due to the elements, but not all of them. The names that were still readable were also names you recognised. Kane, Elliot, Crowne. Three of the First Families of Gotham.

You were about to approach another when you saw something large and black move, out of the corner of your eye. You spun around and shone your flashlight in the direction of the shadow, but there was nothing there.

“Hello?” you called out, which was probably a terrible idea, but it was the only thing you could think of doing. “Who’s there?” You waited for a reply, but no reply came.

Was your nerves making you see things? It couldn’t be a spirit; you weren’t using your powers. Unless… Throughout your life you had heard of non metas who had “seen” things in their peripheral vision. Sometimes they were spirits that had briefly broken through the Veil, other times it really was just people imagining things. Until now you had never experienced it before and you hated how impossible it was to tell which one it was.

Turning on your phone’s screen, you looked at the time. You still had an hour before you had to head back to meet back up with the others. Turning the screen off again, you looked back in the direction you had seen the shadow move toward. Did you follow? It sounded like an awful idea, but the only other thing you could do was head back early and then wait around for everyone else, and that sounded incredibly boring.

‘ Okay, guess I’m doing this then,’ you thought as you began to head down the path, in the direction the shadow had gone.

You had previously thought that there was no way this cemetery could be anymore overgrown than it already was. This new part you were now walking through proved you wrong. Extremely wrong.

Branches hanging low off of trees and thorns from the brambles tugged at your clothing as you passed them. You had to keep an extra careful eye out on where you were stepping so that you didn’t trip over and injure yourself. There were more mausoleums, but you could barely make their shapes out through all of the greenery.

As you walked, that feeling that something was watching you increased tenfold and you found yourself constantly glancing back. Each time you looked you were met with the same result. There was nothing there.

‘ It’s just my overactive imagination ,’ you told yourself, but that did nothing to soothe your growing fear. What if the thing you had seen had been an actual person? And not a good person at that. This was Gotham after all and for some reason Halloween was when most, if not all, the psychopaths suddenly came out to play. Were you about to become another notch in some serial killer’s knife hilt? Oh, you really hoped not. That was not how you wanted to go.

Before your mind could lead you down a dark path of all the vivid ways you could be brutally murdered right now, the path came to an end. At the end of it sat a lone mausoleum. This one didn’t look nearly as old as the others nor was it as covered in plants like the rest. As you walked over to it you saw one of the large iron doors had fallen off its hinges and now laid on the ground.

Cautiously, you approached the entrance. When you were close enough, you shone your light on the name plate. The name ‘Wayne’ was engraved on to it. You got a feeling that that was somehow important, but you really didn’t know why. Nor why you were so drawn to it. Almost as if you were now on autopilot, you stepped inside the mausoleum.

The first two names you saw were Martha and Thomas Wayne. Even years after their deaths, you knew the names well. Before their untimely deaths they had been trying to use their fortune to help the city and its more vulnerable citizens.

The next name you saw, you didn’t recognise. Jason Peter Todd. You were shocked when you saw his death date. “Fuck, you were barely sixteen years old,” you whispered. That was... that was not fair at all.

The last name was Bruce Wayne. It stood out to you a lot more than the others had. Almost as if it was…. Glowing? What? That made no sense. Okay, you were definitely just seeing things now. To prove that to yourself, you turned your flashlight off. The name continued to glow, in fact now it was a hell of a lot brighter.

“What the fuck?”

You peered closer to see if there was any small lights or something similar causing it to glow, but there wasn’t anything. The name was actually glowing! Freaked out, you took a picture of it (without the flash of course), and sent it to Tom. A few agonising minutes passed before he finally replied.

Why are you sending me a completely black photo?

What? You checked the picture you had sent and, yeah, the name was definitely visible.

Can’t you see the glowing name?

If Tom couldn’t see it, then what did that mean?

What are you on about? There’s nothing there. Are you okay?

Was this somehow related to your powers? Is that why Tom wasn’t able to see it? If that was the case, and with each passing second it seemed to be, then he or the others couldn’t help.

Yeah, I’m fine. Nevermind.

Sighing, you checked the time before you shut off you phone and slipped it into your pocket. Thirty minutes before you had to head back. You were on your own. If this was related to your powers then what exactly did you do with it? Your grandma had never mentioned anything like this before, so you had no clue. You still felt uneasy and this new discovery had done nothing to help so you really didn’t want to peer through the Veil, unless it was absolutely necessary.

Would anything happen if you reached out and touched it? You sometimes got flashes of memories or feelings when you touched some items. Maybe this could be the same? You supposed the only way to find out would be to touch the stone. Cautiously you reached out and pressed the palm of your hand against the cold stone.

Images flashed through your mind. Movie tickets, a pearl necklace, a gun. There was the sound of the gun firing, a child’s blood chilling scream and the loud wailing of police sirens. Then it was over and you were brought back to reality, with far more questions than you had previously started with.

Before you were able to question or make sense of what you had seen, your phone vibrated. Taking it out, you saw a text from John, as well as several others.

Are you nearly here?

We were supposed to meet up fifteen minutes ago. Where are you?

Did your phone die?

It did, didn’t it. Unless you’re currently doing one of your meta things?

So what had simply been mere seconds for you in reality had been forty five minutes for everyone else. Which wasn’t all that unusual for you, but could certainly make people that didn’t deal with it daily worry. With that in mind, you fingers flew across your keyboard as you typed out your reply.

Yeah, meta thing, sorry. I’m on my way back now.

You turned your flashlight back on and walked back to the entrance. Before leaving, you looked back to where the glowing of Bruce Wayne’s name was now slowly fading away. Whoever he had been, he was asking for your help. You were sure of it and that’s exactly what you were going to do.

#batman x reader #bruce wayne x reader #batman #bruce wayne #batman x fem!reader #bruce wayne x fem!reader #metahuman!reader #the witching hour #my writing

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thelovelyghostwriter · 3 years

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KuraNeon ABC Fluff Headcanons

uThis ABC is taken from this post. I was thinking, hey, what about KuraNeon?

[Yessss... They have a special attack together on one of the mobile games - not the mobage cards by the way]

Let’s go!

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

Neon’s always bored, given that Kurapika is the one who is doing all the work. She’s often delighted to spend time with him, particularly shopping. She likes to shop for clothes, wearing cute outfits and asking him his opinion of it. She’s a tease and we know it. Sometimes she would purposely try on some racy outift for him to ogle at.

For Kurapika, he doesn’t really have a particular favourite activity with her. He’s just happy to spend time with her.

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

At first they weren’t very close. Kurapika only focused on her flesh-collecting hobby that he disagrees with and Neon finds his serious working attitude boring and she didn’t really care about him. Ironically, the traits that each of them has that the other doesn’t is what draws them to each other.

After spending time together, Kurapika finds her eccentric view on her life interesting, even if he does not agree with them. He likes how she’s happy-go-lucky and just lives in the present, uncaring about what the future brings. Which is kinda ironic for someone who can predict the future.

Neon, on the other hand, finds his stern and down-to-business attitude really amusing. She likes how genuinely concerned he gets in doing the job done and she likes it when he teaches her things that she doesn’t know about. She also catches the glimpse of him being playful, it’s so rare and she likes it when he relaxes once in a while. He’s also really sassy when he wants to and she likes bantering with him.

For physical traits, Kurapika is in denial. She’s one of the few girls he interacted with and he finds her really adorable and pretty. He likes how she’s always wearing long sleeves and it all leads to a lot of imagination. Her eyes also drives him crazy because it holds so much naivety that he wants to stain.

Neon finds Kurapika a pretty boy. She likes his soft blond locks and the red earrings that he wears. She thinks it looks good on him. If she knows that he is a Kurta, she loves those pretty eyes (especially when they’re having sex). The first time Neon sees Kurapika in a tuxedo, her gaze will linger because he looks bonafide yummy in it.

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

I don’t know what panic attack is like so I will not address that.

Kurapika is the type that tries to rationalize things (even though he’s impulsive as shit). So whenever Neon feels down, he will listen to her issues. He will try to understand her situation, analyse it and give her a few suggestions on what she can do. If it’s a problem that cannot be solved practically and she’s being confused/overwhelmed, he will comfort her by saying “it’s okay to feel this way”, he’ll tell her why she’s possibly feeling this way with scientific stuff and whatnot. He’ll find reasons to reassure her that it’s not the end of the world, and that he’ll always be there for her.

For Neon, Kurapika’s issues are deep. Sometimes he won’t even tell it to her. She won’t press him for answers, but she’ll let him hold her. She’ll hug him when he needs comfort. She’ll give him soft kisses on his forehead. She’ll try to distract him from feeling down by getting him to do fun activities like playing chessboard games until he gets better. If he’s working too much, she’ll ensure that he takes breaks by either sleeping, going out with her or you know, the old-fashioned way to de-stress ;)

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

For Neon, she’s not too concerned of the future. To her, it’s just... like that. She goes with the flow of the events and the growth of her connection with Kurapika just like a river. Whatever happens, happens.

Haha, it reminds me of the lullaby my mom used to sing - Que sera, sera. Whatever will be, will be. The future's not ours to see. Que sera, sera.

For Kurapika, it’s bleak. This guy has always been a bag full of worry - which includes the future of his relationship with Neon. Initially, he did not plan to be in this sort of relation with Neon (his employer’s daughter, I might add). At first, he thought he’d marry her for practical reasons and earning her father’s trust, so that he can gain money in order to buy back some of his clan’s eyes.

His relationship with her becomes something a little more than that. He hates himself for being “distracted” or even indulging in that sort of happiness when he’s supposed to be on a mission. As a Last Kurta, he has some sort of survivor’s guilt. He thinks that if he lives on and forgets about bringing justice to his clan, he is bringing disgrace to them. He thinks he doesn’t deserve to live happily. Especially with a flesh collector. He thinks that it’s his duty as the last survivor to collect their eyes and bring them the justice they deserve.

Yet, he sticks around because this is the only thing that keeps him together and prevents him from sinking while trying to carry out this mission. He knows that one day, eventually, this relationship and his mission will become mutually exclusive, and he has to pick one of them. And that will be his mission.

However, whenever he tries to look into the further future after his mission ends, he sees nothing. After his mission, he doesn’t see anything to live for. This goes back to his wishes and thinking if it’s possible to ever live for something else after this whole mission of his is over - which is to be in a relationship with Neon.

It’s a paradox. His dilemma is indeed confusing and mentally straining.

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

Neon is rather passive. She relies on him when it comes for down-to-Earth decisions and she just tags along (she doesn’t care about the boring financial stuff). Ever since Neon lost her ability, he’s the one earning money for them. (He’s kinda like her sugar daddy ahahahha). He loves to be in-charge anyway, given how quickly he got promoted from a mere employee, to a head bodyguard and finally the head of her family.

She does influence him in certain decisions when she suggests it, or demands him what she wants. Depending on how reasonable her request/demands, he will either comply to make her happy or be firm with her by reasoning/compromising with her. Neon will sometimes just pout and agree with it hesitantly, other times she’ll throw a tantrum (and Kurapika has to deal with that, and maybe even “punish” her to discipline her KEKEKEK).

So yes, Kurapika is the dominant one in the relationship because he does a good job in being the role of providing for his partner (and he’s the dom in the bedroom).

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

OMG. Neon has temper tantrums and impatient; and Kurapika’s worse - he’s stubborn and he has a very bad anger management. It’s like a volcano meeting a thunderstorm.

When they fight, they fight big time. Sometimes it’s about Neon’s unreasonable demands/spoilt attitude, sometimes it’s Kurapika’s secretive behaviour or his neuroticism that leads to an argument.

After the fight, both of them will be grumpy towards each other and Neon will refuse to talk to him, glaring at him. Kurapika will be too hard-headed to talk first. Eventually, both will kinda miss each other’s presence. They will forgive each other once they realise that the fight they had was not worth breaking up the relationship.

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

They don’t usually express their gratitude explicitly. At first, they kinda just take it for granted and don’t really think too deeply about it. Especially for Neon, she’s the type of girl that likes luxury and she enjoys all the materialistic goods that Kurapika gives her. After a few months where it really gets serious, she thinks about all the things that Kurapika has done for her - protection, financial security and pretty much, everything for her. I have this headcanon where she does those tiny surprises for him on occasions (e.g. his birthdays) just to tell him how much she appreciates what he’s doing for her.

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

Neon is more open to him whenever he asks. Besides, she can’t really lie or keep secrets from him because he’s sharp.

As for Kurapika, he’s rather secretive and even hid his ethnic identity to her. He doesn’t tell her things and it takes a while for him to open up. This can be a problem because once he admits to Neon, she is rather upset. She doesn’t like how her father lies to her all the time and will be very disappointed in Kurapika when she uncovers his motivations for being hired under her employment initially.

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

I think for both of them, they are both ends of the spectrum. So definitely, along the way, they will influence each other.

Kurapika will teach Neon to be more mindful and caring of those around her. He will try to tell her why sympathising with the dead is as important as caring for the living (because baby girl just likes to make the living happy).

For Kurapika, Neon will get him to at least live in the present and enjoy it, because this boy faces a lot of trauma in his past and constantly worries about the future. Neon will try to get him to relax from time to time, be happy with the ever-present.

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

Neon doesn’t really get jealous because Kurapika is very much focused on her. She knows these bitches aren’t even her competition. Even though he attracts attention as he is a pretty boy, he’s very cold towards them, which actually makes a lot of them disinterested.

As for Kurapika... this man is extremely possessive. He didn’t like the fact that Chrollo talked to Neon that one time in the September auction, and he wanted to know every detail of what happened. Neon gets suitors from the mafia community and he makes sure none of them makes contact with her. He’s also paranoid as hell whenever she talks to a guy. Sometimes Neon finds it suffocating (they even fight about it at times), but she appreciates his overprotective nature and sometimes even teases him about it.

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

Their first kiss was rather awkward. Neon and Kurapika are still young. Neon was kinda heavily guarded so she didn’t have the opportunity to date a guy. She doesn’t seem like she’s interested either. The girl just minds her business and doesn’t seem to appreciate ingenuine attention from men. Kurapika is pretty focused on his mission for his clan so I doubt he dated either. So yes, when they first kissed, it was literally their first kiss. It was soft, short and sweet. And hella awkward because both of them weren’t sure what they were doing.

They will get good at kissing as time passes by. They just have to keep practising by kissing each other HAHA.

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

HAHA. I actually don’t see this couple saying “I love you” to one another - at least for Kurapika’s part. Neon is like 50-50. They pretty much just grow attached to each other over time and expressed their feelings by a kiss or something.

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

Fam. Let me tell you something real quick. Usually, for other pairings, it’s they become close friends, then date, then get married. This pairing is founded by a marriage theory. HAHAH.

It’s a common KuraNeon headcanon where they have an arranged marriage due to some mafia business. At first it will be like any arranged marriage since it was for practical reasons. They go through the motions, play the role of a traditional husband and wife. Then they get it all mixed up with the emotions and then fall in love. They proceed to become a full-fledge consummated marriage relationship and have kids.

N icknames - What do they call their s/o?

Kurapika isn’t really big on the nicknames. It’s more on how he goes from calling her “Boss”, to “Miss Neon” and eventually just her name as he got more comfortable with her.

For Neon, she calls him Kurapika, most of the time. Only when they are in the bedroom, she calls him Daddy. She even puts his contact name on her phone as that. Kurapika was repulsed by it at first, but she was often a playful sub whenever she calls him that. It makes him feel powerful. HAHAHA. Kinky.

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

Both of them can’t really define what love is, or understand what they’re feeling when it first hit them. It’s obvious for everyone - Linssen and the rest of Kurapika’s underlings. They know that their boss is in love with his wife and is sincere about their marriage. Neon just feels happier with his company and she did question it at one point, but decides that it’s for the best to continue and go with the flow. For Kurapika, when he realised that he’s suddenly happier, he’s scared. He’s not sure if he should be feeling happiness at all. He’s always afraid that the fiery wrath within him would die out. He wanted to remove that feeling. A man like him shouldn’t spare any time for love. But he stays anyway because it benefits him.

Neon’s love language is gifts and spending time with someone. She sees gift-giving as something where someone spends the money (which is earned by the hours they spent working) as precious and flattering for her. She dislikes it when the gift is ingenuine. Kurapika knows this and gives her all sorts of things to impress her. Neon also gives back gifts whenever she can. When she shops, she started to shop not only for herself, but enjoys thinking about what she can buy for Kurapika. Kurapika is a busy man, so Neon is often excited whenever he takes off-days to do fun activities with her.

For Kurapika, he’s more of an action guy than words. Aside from giving gifts for her, he shows his affections by doing what he thinks it’s best for both of them. This means protecting her from any harm and making sure they’re financially stable.

Both of them also like to be physically intimate with one another to show their affections.

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

Kurapika is not very open about their relationship in public. Dude is too shy to do PDA. He thinks it’s none of anyone’s business when it comes to his relationship. Neon on the other hand, don’t really care what people think. She will hold his arm whenever they go out, and Kurapika will just let her. He blushes a little whenever she does peck kisses on him in public or in front of their employees. Linssen and the rest will just snigger and tease their Bosses, leaving Kurapika irritated.

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.

Kurapika’s chains. Uhm, joke lmao. He can’t wrap her around his chains even if he wants to. They like to do bondage but they have to use clothes or some other type.

R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

I’d say they are rather an unconventional couple, but their activities are that of a cliche couple. Kurapika is romantic in a sense that he takes her out to dinner, give her gifts and pretty much goes out with her to make her happy. Neon, of course, the ever-so indulgent brat that she is, likes to be pampered. They are okay with a routine-type of relationship, although once in a while, Neon adds in a surprise to make it interesting.

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

Neon doesn’t really have a goal. She’s more onto goods and her desires are often short-lived. Kurapika tries his best to support her in what she wants, given that they are reasonable.

For Kurapika, his goal will always be vengeance and collecting the eyes of his brethren. His marriage to Neon supports that, even if she is unaware of it. Being the head of her family helps him get the power, influence and money to negotiate (and buy) his clan’s eyes.

If Neon does find out about his goals, I think she’ll feel disoriented. She may have an inkling that he is marrying due to some motivations that are hidden; but she was unaware it was this drastic. She will be upset that he wasn’t fully honest, and may have mixed feelings collecting his clan’s eyes. She doesn’t care for dead people, but she does care about living humans and it’s important to Kurapika, who is alive. After a while, she will calm down. I don’t see her actively supporting him, maybe trying to use connections and her ways as a flesh collector to help him find the Scarlet Eye sets. As for the Spiders part, I think she’ll be more of a foil to that so I think she’ll just let him do whatever he’s supposed to do.

As for believing in him, Neon knows that he’s intelligent and he’s one of the bodyguards that are still alive. She had her fair share of bodyguards who just drop dead like flies, so she assumes Kurapika must be strong enough to still be alive and kicking. She is also aware that he has his ways of influencing people, given that her father believes in him. Therefore, she believes in him too. She also acknowledges that Kurapika saved their asses from being broke, when her father was freaking out. So definitely, she knows that he is very capable of running their organisation.

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

I think I already answered this in the “R” for “Romance”.

But if I may add an NSFW...

Well, certainly they do have their own fixed of kinks ahhaha. They start out as being kinda vanilla and just make out, then have some good ol’ missionary sex. And then, Neon, being a mischievous girl that she is, seeks out to try new things. She starts out by calling him “Daddy” and being very bratty/teasing... just to let out his inner dom in the bedroom. She also prompts him to do bondage on her because well, the chains he wears gives them ideas HAHA. Neon will just act like the total brat that needs to be subdued and disciplined; and Kurapika will follow. He likes to be in control; and he finds all sorts of ways to tame his bratty wife sexually. Kurapika is deep down kinky but he doesn’t admit it; and Neon nudges him towards that direction and everything just flows.

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

Okay. So... this is one of the main issues with their relationship. But this is what, I believe, makes it so interesting yet difficult to write a slowburn canon-compliant fiction of them.

Neon doesn’t understand him well because she mostly minds her business and is more self-centred. And the way she empathise with people is different from how Kurapika expects her to be. Canonically, they are the polar opposite. Neon (and Light Nostrade) acted as a foil in the YorkNew City. Neon values the life of the living, breathing people; and not giving two cents about the people that had died. Kurapika, on the other hand, mourns for his dead clan.

At first, Kurapika wanted to change the way she thinks - which is, of course, it kinda fails. Her hobby is in direct conflict of his beliefs.

While canonically, he straightaway knew her situation (that conversation he had with Basho explaining that it was the father that is using the daughter, not the other way round), it was not indicated if he sympathises with her. He was just very task-focused to impress Light Nostrade and gain his trust, which is to protect his daughter.

It definitely took a while for him to know her aside from being a “flesh collector” and the “bratty girl”. Maybe he got to know her more as a person, who is not so far from his age.

As for Neon, I imagine her whining about Kurapika’s strict behaviour as a bodyguard, and finding him a bit boring to converse with due to his serious attitude while working.

This couple really needs a LOT of patience with one another and time for them to bond.

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

I think I had already addressed this in the “D - Dreams” section.

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

Neon and Kurapika initially never considered having kids, until Kurapika knocked her up and they have their first son. They named their first son Pairo. They have like, 3 to 5 subsequent kids, depending on how many kids you want them to go for. No matter how many girls and boys they have, all of them have Scarlet Eyes.

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

Oh yes. They do enjoy kissing and cuddling. And sex. But yeah, they don’t usually do PDA because Kurapika is rather shy about that. But behind closed doors? They’re doing more than kisses and cuddling - if you know what I mean.

Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

They will be upset. They will try to get themselves busy. For Neon, she will shop and play card games with her fellow attendants to get her mind off of him. She will wonder how he’s been, send him text messages and nudes while at work and complain about how much of a workaholic this guy is.

For Kurapika, usually he’s the one away for either a business trip or on his way across the world to obtain another set of the Scarlet Eyes. He will think about her, it irritates him because missing her distracts him from the task at hand and he can’t help it. He’ll call her at some points of the day to just hear her voice and ask her well-being, to check whether everything in the mansion is fine or not.

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

Kurapika is persuasive in getting what he wants. That includes doing all sorts of tricks and nefarious ways to protect their relationship. As for Neon, if someone is blocking them, she will try to eliminate it by making demands and throw tantrums.

However, they won’t admit it. They will find some excuse to jusify their behaviour, which often fails.

Also, special thanks to @anotherworldash for helping me with Y and Z.

#kuraneon #kuraneo #kurapikaxneon #kuraneon headcanons

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kingandfireheart · 3 years

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What stories are left in ACOTAR: Elain edition

It is likely that the next installment of the ACOTAR series will cover Elain Archeron. Elain is probably the least developed character of the Inner Circle, and the only character (other than Amren and Lucien) whose perspective we haven’t seen yet. This post details her trauma, the issue of choice, Elain’s personality, the sweet innocent Elain image, and her various roles.

Elain will definitely have to face her past trauma, which include:

Graysen: grief, feeling of betrayal

The Cauldron and being kidnapped: trauma, feeling violated, becoming high fae

Her father: grief

Sisters: having a role in the Night Court, belonging there, being protected

Choices:

Before I get into Elain’s role, I want to talk about a huge thing for Elain, which is choice. Rhysand spends ACOMAF and ACOWAR showing Feyre that she always has choices. Nesta struggles with this in ACOSF, and while Nesta does make choices to be more active - she kills the Kelpie, saves Feyre, saves her friends, she choses Cassian, and kills Briallyn.

“I am not a thing to be controlled by you”, Nesta said icily. Everything in her life, from the moment she was born, had been controlled by other people. Things happened to her; anytime she tried to exert control, she’d been thwarted at every turn -- and she hated that even more than the King of Hybern.

Elain, who has suffered much of the same trauma as Nesta, will make her own choices in her book. Those choices will involve who she ends up with (I refuse to get into the Elucien/Elriel debacle here - I like both!), how she wields her power (as a seer, as high fae, as a Made person, as the Cauldron’s favorite, as a political pawn), and what she makes of the situations that happened to her.

Elain has already shown that she can make good on a bad situation in ACOWAR, I’m excited to see how she keeps that up in her book:

“This could end very badly, Elain.” // She brushed her thumb over the iron-and-diamond engagement ring. “It’s already ended badly. Now it’s just a matter of deciding how we meet the consequences.” (ACOWAR)

“I know your circumstances for coming here were awful, Nesta, but it doesn’t mean you need to be so miserable about it.” (ACOSF)

Sweet Innocent Elain:

Elain’s persona in the Inner Circle is a sweet and innocent girl. She loves gardening and cooking. She is kind and cares about things like manners and propriety. Here are a few quotes that show that:

Elain had always been gentle and sweet—and I had considered it a different sort of strength. A better strength. To look at the hardness of the world and choose, over and over, to love, to be kind. She had been always so full of light. (ACOWAR)

“You’re still lovely,” Mor said a bit gently. Elain offered a half smile. “I suppose that war makes wanting things like that unimportant.”Mor was quiet for a heartbeat. “Perhaps. But you should not let war steal it from you regardless.” (ACOWAR)

“What now?” Elain mused, at last answering my question from moments ago as her attention drifted to the windows facing the sunny street. That smile grew, bright enough that it lit up even Azriel’s shadows across the room. “I would like to build a garden,” she declared. “After all of this … I think the world needs more gardens.” (ACOWAR)

“I wonder if everyone has spent so long assuming Elain is sweet and innocent that she felt she had to be that way or else she’d disappoint you all.” “With time and safety, perhaps we’ll see a different side of her emerge.”(ACOSF Bonus Chapter)

We know that there is a lot more to Elain than anyone gives her credit for - Cassian, Amren, Rhys, and even Nesta point this out on different occasions in ACOSF:

Cassian: “Nesta was wrong to think Elain as loyal and loving as a dog. Elain saw every single thing Nesta had done, and understood why.”

Amren: “Elain, who is more than capable of defending herself against the darkness of the Trove, if she chooses to. Don’t underestimate her.”

Rhys: “I also think we haven’t seen all she has to offer. “Don’t forget that gardening often results in something pretty, but it involves getting one’s hands dirty along the way” “And torn up by thorns”

Nesta: “Elain stiffened, but refused to balk from whatever she beheld in Nesta’s gaze. “You think I’m to blame for his death? Challenge laced each word. Challenge - from Elain of all people.

We also see Elain starting to take back her power in ACOSF when she steps up to look for the Dread Trove

“You do not decide what I can and cannot do, Nesta.”

“You can’t have it both ways. You cannot resent my decision to lead a small, quiet life while also refusing to let me do anything greater.”

“I am not a child to be fought over”

“I went into the Cauldron too, you know. And it captured me. And yet somehow all you think of it what my trauma did to you.”

Elain’s Roles:

Sister: Elain has long been a mediator between Nesta and Feyre. She is the calmness that complements each of their fire, she is the one they each seek to protect. (I’m thinking of SJM’s fire/ice/stone metaphor for Manon, Asterin, and Sorrel). However, she is able to fight for what she wants with each of them, and use her skills to her advantage. Elain shows Feyre her remorse for the years when they are poor, which is why Elain and Nesta step up to help with the Mortal Queens.

“Feyre gave and gave—for years. Let us now help her. Help … others.” (ACOMAF)

“And as for Feyre’s hunting during those years, it was not Nesta’s neglect alone that is to blame. We were scared, and had received no training, and everything had been taken, and we failed her. Both of us.” (ACOMAF)

Sweet, innocent Elain who vomited from the violence on the battlefields, who recoiled from Cassian’s weapons, does show that she is willing to fight for her sisters.

Elain stepped out of a shadow behind him, and rammed Truth-Teller to the hilt through the back of the king’s neck as she snarled in his ear, “Don’t you touch my sister.”

Seer: Elain seemed to gain clarity once she realized what she was seeing. She says she can control her Seer talk, and actually uses this power to help Feyre find the Suriel in ACOWAR, and offers to do the same with the Dread Trove. It isn’t clear if Elain’s refusal to acknowledge her powers stems from fear, lack of acceptance, or just the fact that she needed to be normal before she can embrace her new life.

“Are you asking me that as her sister, or as a seer?” (ACOFAS)

“Then I will find it. I might require some time to ... reacquaint myself with my powers, but I could start today.” (ACOSF)

Made and Cauldron’s Favorite: Just like Nesta and Feyre, Elain is Made. All of the Like Calls to Like logic that applies to Feyre in ACOMAF with the Cauldron and the Book of Breathings and Nesta in ACOSF with the Dread Trove applies to Elain. Now that Nesta’s power is limited, Elain may have to step up and use her power to help find the fourth Dread Trove item or with a new Cauldron-related task. The big distinguishing factor here is that the Cauldron likes Elain.

The Cauldron purred in Elain’s presence as the King of Hybern slumped to his knees, clawing at the knife jutting through his throat. Elain backed away a step.

The Cauldron seemed to realize what she’d done, too, as his head thumped onto the mossy ground. That Elain … Elain had defended this thief. Elain, who it had gifted with such powers, found her so lovely it had wanted to give her something … It would not harm Elain, even in its hunt to reclaim what had been taken.

“You were Made by the Cauldron. You may track other objects Made by it as well... and because you are Made by it, you are immune to the influence and power of the Trove. You might use them, yes, but they cannot be used upon you.”

Lucien’s Mate: Elain hasn’t been raised with the mating bond, she doesn’t care for it in ACOWAR when she tries to win Graysen back, but it is possible that after almost two years in the Night Court, and watching both of her sisters accept their bonds, that she may want to acknowledge it, or at least understand it. Being Lucien’s Mate also makes Elain a political pawn. Her presence in the Night Court ensures Lucien’s loyalty, and given that Lucient has ties to 3 of the seven courts and the human lands. Elain could potentially wield the power of those alliances (or destroy them based on her relationship with Lucien).

“You are his mate. Do you even know what that means?”// “It means nothing,” Elain said, her voice breaking. “It means nothing. I don’t care who decided it or why they did—”// “You belong to him.”//“I belong to no one. But my heart belongs to you.”(ACOWAR)

“You couldn’t say a single word to him? A pleasant greeting?//“He brought you a present”// “And that entitles him to my time, my affections?”// “No. He is a good male. He cares for you.”// “He doesn’t know me.” //“You don’t give him the chance to even try to do so.”//“I don’t want a mate. I don’t want a male” (ACOFAS)

Elain, the wretch, had taken the seat between Feyre and Varian, about as far from Lucien as she could get.

Cassian’s heart strained at the pain etching deep into Lucien’s face as he tried to hide his disappointment and longing. Elain only shrank further into herself, no trace of that newfound boldness to be seen.

Member of the Inner Circle: Elain insists that she is a member of the Night Court in ACOSF, and offers her help in tracking down the Dread Trove. . She is already an active member at Inner Circle dinners (seen in ACOFAS and ACOSF), and those bonds could continue to grow.

“And he knew the cruelty of the Hewn City troubled her. But she hadn’t hesitated to come. When Feyre had offered to let her remain home, Elain had squared her shoulders and declared she was a part of this court -- and would do whatever was needed. ... He’d never once in the two years he’d known her found Elain to be plain, but wearing black, no matter how much she claimed to be part of this court... It sucked the life from her.”

Nuala and Cerrdiwen’s Friend: Elain has befriended the two half-wraiths who spy for both Azriel and Rhys. Give Elain’s powers for persuasion (”my sister Elain can convince anyone to do anything with a few smiles”) and observation (”Nesta never spoke if afterward, I just observed”// “Elain’s brown eyes flickered, well aware of all that.” ), she could make an interesting spy or courtier.

“They’d spent more time with Elain than even I had. They understood her moods, what she sometimes needed.” (ACOFAS)

Nesta started, not having heard her sister approach She scanned Elain from head to toe, wondering if she’d been taking lessons in stealth either from Azriel or the two half-wraiths she called friends. (ACOSF)

#elain archeron #acotar #elain #elain archeron week #kp analysis #acotar series #mtp

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tricewithaz · 3 years

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THOTS ON SHADOW AND BONE

Hello everyone! it is I, Trice, and i come with my thoughts on the Shadow and Bone show cause ive got many

I'm gonna divide this in what i liked, what i disliked, and what i think could have been better but didn't really bother me. Feel free to send your opinions too!

As a whole, I really liked the show and I think it's a great adaptation that both fans and newcomers will enjoy. It's super well done! and every episode had me glued to the tv even though I knew what was going to happen.

Beware this is long

To start,

What i liked

Mal and Alina

I never really liked Mal in the books, mainly cause he had like, nothing going on for him, and not having his pov made him no favors whatsoever. Alina's perception of him was everychanging, two factors that didn't make him unlikeable necessarily, but that made me not want to read about him. In the show he's way more likeable and even though he still doesn't have a lot going on for him, you can see that he's always trying to protect alina, and you also see a bit of his demeanor through Archie's acting. I think he made a great job at portraying him. And Alina! Alina who in the books was essentially a y/n sort of character (although she did get better over time), her character, likes, dislikes, her DRIVE was incredibly portrayed in the show. Also Jessie (loml, marry me) and Archie have incredible chemistry together and they sold their yearning SO WELL (and so did the kid actors portraying them as children oh my GOD)...yall...i cried when they held hands. My favourite scene was definitely when Alina took care of Mal's wounds (a favorite trope of mine). And the HURT in their eyes whenever they thought the other was in danger....i saw the show dubbed but I'm sure their voices made it beyond incredible as well, their face acting was just on. point. Overall the show rEALLY makes me root for them both individually and together which is something the books didn't manage to do.

The Darkling

AAAAA i really enjoyed the Darkling omg, incredible charisma, Ben does such a great job (and so did his voice actor in Spanish oh my GOD). His acting was just as I imagined it in the books and i loved how he could be as sweet and mysterious as he could be menacing. In fact! i liked him more than i did in the book, and i think it was a great choice to make him more human. I'm not sure if this was Ben or the writing, but i could really see his yearning for an equal, for Alina, his loneliness and his thirst for power and control too. Great love interest, even greater villain. And his wardrobe was phenomenal. I also really liked how they implied that The Darkling was a name given by other people, it was very believable that people would call someone who literally controls shade something akin to "son of the dark" or something of the sort, instead of it being a name he gives himself or his job title (both if which are incredibly pathetic and cringy to think about).

Jesper

No comments. He was just great. I love Kit.

Nina

Omg Danielle did SUCH a great job at portraying Nina, it's exactly how i imagined her in Six of Crows.

Helnik

THE. YEARNING. THE. CHEMISTRY. I didn't love their scenes at the boat but once that was over I was practically screaming at the screen to jUST KISS ALREADY. Calahan and Daniell have such good chemistry together and the few changes they made only served the story better. I did wish they had development over more time cause Matthias' change of mind felt too quick, but i get why they had to rush. Because of how good their chemistry was, their fallout also was incredibly painful.

Inej's fear of the Menagerie and her morals

Amita's portrayal of Inej's hurt, devotion and her refusal to kill (and later hurt cause she has killed) is incredibly subtle but so SO effective. She's so talented really and truly sold Inej's feelings throughout the show.

VFX

Man.....the fold, the volcra, the grisha powers.....kudos to the animators and overall artistic team cause they were incredible. Also seeing the different title animations in each episode was such a tiny detail that made me so excited and they all looked so good.

Ketterdam

Again, kudos to the artistic team, everything about Ketterdam felt so alive (and weirdly moist), truly sold a kind of aesthetic and life that is so characteristic if the Barrel, even when i didn't imagine it that way in the books.

David

He appeared like, twice, and both times were so cute and charming I can't wait to see more of him both on his own and with Genya.

The Wardrobe

So, at first i hated the keftas. I thought the looked tacky and costume, but when you see them on screen they're just perfect (although i have to say the patterns on some of the keftas were kind of...cheap looking? and the training keftas were just kinda boring. My favourite was the Darkling's. Aside from that, i really liked Kaz's and inej's clothes too. Very distinctive and recognizable (although it was kind of weird seeing Inej in teal instead of purple lmao).

And the queen's dresses. Chefs kiss.

It's...so cheesy (affectionate)

The whole show felt like the kind of movies I would watch as a kid like Harry Potter and Pirates of the Caribbean. The writing was stylized enough to make it incredibly dramatic and overall there was just so much heart behind all of it. Definetely a show to watch again and again and feel all of it, cause that's what it being so cheesy managed, to make me actually feel for it. It feels like something to watch on a rainy afternoon after a bad day....it's great okay i really enjoyed it, even (specially) the most unbelievable parts of it. And here's the thing, it's something that i think a lot of newer tv and film have lost, so this is good.

What i didn't like

Zoya

Mostly cause of the writing. Originally, in the first book, i didn't like her, neither as a character (stereotypical mean girl with no other motivation than to bang the love interests....all three of them....what's new i still think it's an incredibly sexist trope) or a person (hey at least this was intentional), but over time i grew to LOVE her (mean girl turns out to have a good heart and actually respects the mc and decides to fight alongside her cause it's what's right, without necessarily liking her or giving up her character??? AND she has strong motivations??? now THAT'S new). In the show, i hoped they would keep her mean girl nature while foreshadowing her depth, but all they did was turn her into a petty seductress with barely any screentime, and that only makes her not even a bad antagonist but just a boring character to watch. Not only that but they took away a big part of her character that needed to be developed in the next books. I wanted to watch her rivalry with Alina, her unjustified venomous tongue too, I wanted to be entertained by her and I wasn't. This was also a problem cause when she finally changed teams, and when she hugged Alina, it was incredibly unsatisfying, it would have had a way stronger effect if we had seen her being Ruthless Zoya with a big ambition. I also didn't like how we were told that she didn't like alina, or that she had a family, instead of it being shown on screen. Just from the show, all i can tell you about her is that she likes to bang people and she has a good moral code i guess. Yall, I'm so petty about this.

Kaz

So, I didn't hate him, in fact i think I would have enjoyed him if I hadn't read the books first, cause the two things that bother me about him were two essential characteristics of him in the books. FIrstly, he seems so strained, instead of the seemingly laid back, almost chill looking (even though we know he's not chill at all) Kaz we see in the books, the Kaz that always knows something that you don't. Show Kaz doesn't seem to always be in control, to always have the last word, the last laugh. Instead he seems strained, all the damn time. And I think this is mainly a writing and directing issue. And he also seems weak, something Book Kaz would never do. This is also an issue cause because he doesn't have the same presence he has in the books, the times where he is weak, don't seem as effective. Sure, Pekka Rollins has essentially reduced him and humiliated him, but I haven't seen enough of Kaz being actually dangerous for this to be shocking and for Pekka to seem even more hateable (and, i really liked Pekka, loved him as an antagonist more than i did in the books). Idk, Kaz was so charismatic and just fun and engaging to read in the books that his portrayal in the show felt lacking.

Alina's power's VFX

The little suns were cute and all but the light coming from within her was just ugly I'm sorry.

SFX

A lot of the sound design was just too stylized for the tone of the show i think. I particularly remember the sound of Mal's punches....what's that about.

What i think could have been better, but didn't particularly dislike

The Crows' storyline

And i think part of this is a consequence of Kaz not being as witty as he was in the books. Where's the incredibly complicated heist moves? the even more unbelievable C and D plans when something goes wrong? I didn't like that them getting Alina was essentially just luck, cause i didn't see enough of them being smart and quick on their feet. I also think it was unnecessary to have their storyline mixed with Alina's, i would have enjoyed watching a different heist, maybe in Ravka as well, and them incidentally crossing paths with Alina, more than i liked this storyline. ironically enough, the heist was the part i was least interested in

Genya and Alina

I just feel like her relationship with Alina wasn't strong enough, and i think it's because the show tried to make us believe they were much closer than they were without spending the necessary time in them.

Overall, I really really enjoyed the show, i will be watching it again (particularly cause i want to watch it in English) and i cannot wait for the second season omg (although i have to say, I'm scared for Nikolai)

I think that's all! I would also love to read yall's opinions and have a conversation.

#Shadow and Bone #Shadow and Bone spoilers #sab #sab spoilers #grishaverse #the grisha trilogy #six of crows #malina #helnik #shadow and bone series #sab review

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writtenonreceipts · 3 years

Text

The idea of this came quick and haphazardly. I meant to have it ready on thanksgiving, but then didn’t, haha...enjoy a last little slice of thanksgiving fic...

About 2K. Planning on doing a Christmas and/or new years addition with this one too.

Thanks so much for reading!

Friends Like These

Aelin cursed as she stared at the pan of green beans she pulled from her oven. Frowning she glared at the mess of crispy fried onions on top and the edges that were most certainly black instead of golden brown.

“Well this was a terrible idea.”

She didn't even like green bean casserole but Lysandra had insisted they needed green beans of some sort and Aelin was a mess of uncertainty. She wanted to bring an extra chocolate pie but Lys refused that front citing that she had all her pie bases covered.

Aelin did not believe her. For as much as she loved her best friend, Lys did not understand Aelin’s desires for chocolate and pie in general.

Back to the green beans however, Aelin was certain they were burned. Who the hell liked green beans anyways?

“A real, real terrible idea.”

Talking to herself wasn't going to fix anything, so Aelin grabbed her oven mitts and made for the door of her apartment. By some twist of fate and intense insistence, Aelin lived across the hall from her best friend and cousin. Lysandra and Aedion had only been married a few months and they were already intent on being the go-to couple for holidays and other occasions. As long as it meant Aelin didn't have to clean her place, she didn't care.

She left her apartment door open and crossed the hall to Lysandra’s.

"Open up bitch,” she called and kicked the door. Too late did she think that the neighbors would not appreciate her antics. She received far too many looks of exasperation from them anyways.

Despite how much she really didn’t care, she glanced down the hall. Maybe she could ditch this poorly made casserole on some unsuspecting soul. As she glanced down towards the elevators, she caught sight of a ridiculously good-looking man coming up the hall and he had most definitely heard her.

His silvery hair was stark compared to his bronze skin and his button up shirt strained against his obvious muscles. Oh he was very attractive. Aelin had quite often found herself fondling over the likes of Rowan Whitethorn.

It was highly unfortunate that he was already here, considering Aelin was still in yoga pants and an oversized cardigan stained with bleach from a misadventure in cleaning. Not to mention her hair was a failing top knot and she hadn’t even put on a coat of chapstick today. Oh hell, she was most definitely staring at him.

“Galathynius,” Rowan said, giving her a long, penetrating look. His generous mouth tilted into something akin to a sneer.

“Whitehorn,” she replied. She prided herself at least on the fact that she managed not to lick her lips while checking him out. Because holy hell it should be illegal for him to look so well put together. She wasn’t sure if she preferred him in this almost professional style as compared to the dark grunge that he was usually found in. Or both. Definitely both.

Aelin was saved from saying or doing anything else as Lysandra opened the door to her apartment.

“You actually brought something other than chocolate,” Lysandra said with an amused sort of expression

“Bite me,” Aelin snapped and swerved past into the apartment.

She missed whatever Lysandra said to Rowan, but it was clearly filled with more love and appreciation than what was extended to Aelin.

Aelin entered the kitchen and was immediately greeted by the scents of cooking turkey, stuffing, and rolls. It was wonderful. She stuck her still hot pan on the edge of the counter while she dug out another hotpad from where Lysandra usually kept them.

Aedion was busy setting things up in the small living room where he’d dragged out their table and an extra foldable one. It looked like there were far more place settings than Aelin had been expecting.

“Hey Aelin,” Aedion said as he settled a floral arrangement on the table. It was a cheapish plastic one—but it reminded Aelin of years growing up with him and tossing the abused decoration around the table to use it as a means of hiding from Aunt Maeve.

“Hey, where d’you want this,” she asked, holding up the green beans.

“Wherever should be good,” Aedion said with a shrug. He looked the pan over and frowned. “You burned the green beans?”

“No one even likes green beans Ashryver,” Aelin fired back. She slapped down the hotpad and the casserole and tried to pretend she didn’t care.

Truth was, she’d actually tried on the casserole. But she wouldn’t admit that. It would just make the end product all the more pathetic.

“Thanks so much for bringing pie, Rowan,” Lysandra was saying from the kitchen. “I tried asking Lorcan, but he was staunchly against it.”

“Nah, the bastard would never make such a commitment,” Rowan. Aelin glanced at him to see a crooked smile that did not help her feel any better about herself. “He will bring plenty of booze though.”

“At least he’s good for something,” Lysandra laughed. Her laugh was short lived though as she looked between Aelin and Rowan. It was no secret the two had nothing short of a hostile relationship. No matter how long their friend groups had been integrated for—they always found a way to be at each other’s throats.

Lysandra took the bag of pie from Rowan and smiled gratefully. “Also, I appreciate everything you’ve done in the shop, too. I don’t know what I wouldn’t do without the help.”

Just across the street, Lysandra was opening a clothing boutique that would hopefully expand into a makeup and hair styling salon as well. While Aedion was finishing his law degree and working full time in an apprenticeship, Lysandra had bitten the bullet to fulfill her dream of owning her own business. Even if it was a slightly inconvenient time to be an entrepreneur. Aelin couldn’t have been prouder of her best friend.

“Oh, until everyone else gets here, Rowan can help you move that dresser Aelin,” Lysandra said suddenly. Aelin froze in a sudden wave of panic. “She’s getting rid of that tiny little dresser she has and got a new one. You’ve been complaining about it all week.”

Rolling her eyes, Aelin brushed a few loose bits of hair from her forehead. “It hasn’t been all week.”

“Right, just the hours we’ve been together,” Lysandra said with an ironic sort of expression. In truth, the two had spent nearly every waking minute together in the hopes of getting the shop ready to open.

Scowling, Aelin made her way back to the door of the apartment. “Can’t believe you married her Aedion. C’mon, buzzard. I need help, apparently.”

“You can’t move a damn dresser by yourself?” Rowan groused. But he followed after her, shooting irritated looks over his shoulder no doubt.

“Be nice to each other!” Aedion called after. “It’s Thanksgiving.”

The door closed softly behind them. The hall was silent as they crossed the short distance to Aelin’s place. She was muttering under her breath the entire time about how annoying it was to have him in her apartment.

As soon as they entered Aelin’s apartment, Fleetfoot was on them. The dog, despite loving her mother to no end, went to Rowan with an excited flap of her tail. Rowan glared down at Fleetfoot in exasperation.

“Don’t you give your dog any attention?” He asked.

Aelin gave him the finger over her shoulder as she went to her room. “Get your ass in here and help me.”

Rowan cursed under his breath and followed. “Why do you need a new dresser anyways. The old one was fine.”

“Well someone told me it was too small. And someone said that how could a substantial amount of clothing even fit in the drawers I had. And that same someone told me that something had to change.” She leaned against her bedroom door and glared at him. “And that, dumbass, was you. So now I have a giant dresser that I don’t know what to do with. So really, this is all your fault.”

Rowan quirked a brow and looked down at her, but he said nothing.

For the past three months since Rowan had begun helping Lysandra in her shop, the two had started something. Something that neither knew how to define or explain. It involved quite a bit of kissing, sex, and staying over at one another’s apartments. And no one else in their friend group knew.

The previous week Rowan had made a comment about never having enough space for his things in Aelin’s place which had resulted in an uncomfortable conversation of defining what it was exactly they were doing together. It promptly led to ignored texts and phone calls.

“You got a new dresser,” Rowan said, finally.

Aelin dropped her eyes from his and turned slightly so she was leaning against the wall instead of the doorjamb. She looked into her room where the new dresser was standing at an awkward angle. She hadn’t quite known what to do with it so she’d left it half up against one wall and half blocking her closet. Rowan wasn’t supposed to find out about the dresser this way. Mostly because she didn’t want for it to be a big deal, even though it was...they’d danced around the idea of each other and being more than friends with benefits for so long that this—giving up space and a little bit of independence was huge.

Especially for Aelin.

“I just wanted some more space,” she said dismissively.

Rowan’s eyes were still on her. She could feel them burning into her. If she looked at him now, she was certain she would combust. There was always something about Rowan that made her feel different. That made her feel complete. It was strange to say. Especially after being on her own for so long. But being with him, even for the few short months, had given her a new sense of purpose and self that Aelin had never had before.

“More space?” Rowan asked, stepping closer to her.

Aelin chewed on her bottom lip and finally looked up. “Less space?”

Rowan grinned down at her, his body heat completely enveloping her as he pulled her to him.

Aelin went willingly, wrapping her arms around him and clinging to him tightly. It was slightly embarrassing how much she’d missed him. Even in this one week of being apart and not even texting had been unbearable.

With gentle hands, Rowan cupped her face and ran his calloused fingers over her cheeks. The feel of it caused Aelin to shiver and immediately want to burrow into him again. Rowan had other plans as he tilted her chin up and captured her lips with his.

Sighing happily, Aelin melted into his touch. She curled her fingers in his hair and pressed herself harder against him. Every other plan for the day went right out her head. None of it mattered when he was so close.

A loud knock sounded on the front door and Fenrys’ voice called out from the kitchen. “Have you two killed each other or what? Come on! Turkey’s getting cold.”

“We’re coming,” Rowan called out as Aelin pressed her lips into his neck, in part to suppress her grin and also because she wasn’t ready to let him go. “Galathynius can’t make up her mind.”

Aelin nipped at his skin with her teeth and his hands tightened on her hips.

“Finish after turkey, I didn’t spend all morning making yams for them to go to waste,” Fenrys yelled back. The front door slammed shut as he left.

Aelin couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped her as she kissed her way back to Rowan’s lips. “I don’t want to go.”

Rowan pressed his forehead against hers, breath slightly uneven. “Unless you want to tell everyone about us.”

Shaking her head, Aelin sighed. “I’m not ready to share you.”

She of course already did share him with everyone, but Rowan seemed to grasp the underlying meaning of her words as he captured her mouth once more. The kiss was hot and deep and Aelin was ready to lock the door to her apartment and feign death or illness if it meant she could spend the day wrapped up in Rowan.

“Fireheart,” he whispered.

“Buzzard,” she replied.

He smiled against her lips before pulling back and running his thumb over her cheek. “Beautiful.”

“I look like hell,” she complained.

Rowan shook his head. “Beautiful,” he repeated before regretfully pulling away.

Aelin sighed before running her hands down his chest and interlocking he fingers with his, just for a moment.

“Stay the night?” she asked quietly.

Rowan rolled his eyes. “You just need help with that dresser.”

“True,” she admitted, “but I also missed you.”

Rowan nodded once before giving her a quick, chaste kiss. “C’mon or else we’ll really have to tell everyone about us.”

Sighing, Aelin pulled away completely. She left her room and made sure Fleetfoot was settled on the couch, and episode of “The Office” playing on the tv to keep the dog company.

Before they let her apartment, she looked back at Rowan with a determined gleam in her eyes. “Soon.”

“Soon,” Rowan agreed.

And they went back to being somewhat tolerable friends.

thanks for reading dears, i so appreciate the support and comments and everything!

tags: if i missed you let me know, by inbox/asks are always open

@tottenhamboys20 @morganofthewildfire @aelinchocolatelover @more-espresso-less-depresso-xx @bamchickawowow

#aelin and rowan #rowan whitethorn #rowaelin au #rowaelin #rowaelin fanfic #throne of glass #the fanfic no one asked for continues #aelin galathynius

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votederpycausemufins · 3 years

Text

i recovered from having less than two hours of sleep by having 11ish hours of sleep! wow i’m so healthy with those sleep habits!

@petrichormeraki

When Grian called Mumbo over to his old hobbit hole, Mumbo didn’t know what to expect. Maybe he wanted to change the rail system or needed help with his villagers. Mumbo didn’t expect the mystery member to be there. “Is this Tommy?”

Grian nodded. “He’s been staying here. He said I could bring you to meet him.”

Mumbo didn’t think the expression Tommy wore really agreed with the statement Grian made. The boy looked like the moment there was an unexpected noise, he would bolt. The sword in his hand made it also seem like a fight would happen. But it wasn’t even an iron sword. It was merely stone. “Um, hello there. My name is Mumbo. Of course you’re Tommy.” In nervousness, Mumbo went to straighten his tie, but Tommy just shifted his position, looking ready to strike.

Mumbo wanted to ask why Grian hadn’t offered any clothes, but he was sure the builder would have. Still, Mumbo couldn’t wrap his head around why this boy would continue to wear rags. There were tears all over his shirt and pants and he only wore one shoe. Deep bags were under dull blue eyes that looked at Mumbo warrily.

Mumbo tried once more to speak to Tommy, but it managed to spook him and he bolted. The redstoner was left feeling downtrodden, but Grian comforted him. “Hey, you met him at the very least, and he lasted longer around you than when I first found him.” That got a small smile from Mumbo as he was cheered up, even if it was just a little.

Mumbo was reminded of the first time he saw Tommy when looking at him now. Same torn clothes. Same missing shoe. Same defensive stance. Even the bags under his eyes seemed the same, but the eyes themselves did not.

“Tommy.”

“Oh yeah, add that on the list. How the fuck do you know my name?”

Mumbo cringed. He forgot Tommy had been this crude in the past. He held up his hands in surrender. “My name is Mumbo. I sort of just wandered over here. There was a portal, but it got broken.”

“What, you get banned from the nether too?”

“What? No! Tommy, did you?”

“Still haven’t answered how you know my name.”

Mumbo couldn’t just say ‘oh we’ve been friends for a while, you’ve just got amnesia.’ or ‘oh I think I’m from the future’ or something. But there was one thing that was true. He learned Tommy’s name from Grian. “One of your brothers told me.”

Tommy scoffed. “Ghostbur. Where’s he been all this time?”

“I’m not entirely sure.” He wasn’t. He hadn’t even known Wilbur as anything but alive so far.

“Dream said I’m not supposed to have anyone here. So you should be leaving.”

Mumbo rubbed the back of his head. “Well, I’m not completely sure I’m in the best standing with Dream either. And you’re…” What had he said? Banished? Exiled a voice supplied. “Exiled, and I sort of am too. Makes sense we stay here together.”

Tommy stared at Mumbo with squinted eyes before he finally stopped holding his weapon up and Mumbo breathed out a breath he didn’t realize he had been holding in.

“You could even have this place if you want. At this point I give up here. Might as well just run off where Dream can’t find me.”

“Do… do you mind if I come with?” Mumbo asked, Tommy glancing at him from the side.

“Fine, as long as you’re not planning to fuck everything up Mumbitch.”

Mumbo held his tongue. He’s never heard that before. But he supposed it made sense with the current situation. Tommy started walking and Mumbo followed behind. They walked, nearing a village on the edge of a dark oak forest. Tommy killed a pig and started to eat the raw mean, but Mumbo stopped him, handing him five golden carrots. He would have given more, but he wasn’t sure if the surplus would frighten Tommy or put him on edge. Even with the small amount, the blond looked suspicious before he finally took them to eat.

They then started collecting wheat and hay bales from the village before continuing on, reaching some snowy plains. The sun was starting to rise and then in the distance Mumbo could see a house. “Is that your place?” Mumbo asked, making Tommy shake his head.

“No, it’s my brother’s. Wilbur found it and told me where it is. I figure he’ll have gear we can use.”

Mumbo was glad Tommy had someone to rely on until they actually reached the house and Tommy started rifling through the chests, grabbing whatever he wanted. “Are you sure your brother is okay with this?” Mumbo asked and Tommy laughed.

“Oh definitely not. That’s why we’ll need to hide under the floorboards if we want more.”

Mumbo was left stunned while Tommy started to dig, making a small room under the house. It had barely enough room for the essentials and ended up only half decorated with yellow concrete. Mumbo cringed a little at a sign put up that read ‘no pussies allowed’. The final touch Tommy made was making a secondary, even smaller room where he placed a log and a bell. “Yeah! Prime log!” And he started hitting the bell.

Mumbo rushed to grab Tommy’s hand. Tommy tried to wrestle it back, but his days in exile had left him weakened. Mumbo looked up at the ceiling, expecting to hear something from above, but when he didn’t, the redstoner sighed and let Tommy go.

Mumbo wanted to work when Tommy was asleep, but he refused to in the now unfamiliar presence of the hermit. So instead Mumbo placed a few blocks between them and got to work. The only way in and out right now was from just digging holes. Sure, it could be effective, the simplest of simple secret entrances, but it could be better.

When Tommy saw the new entrances Mumbo made, he was stunned by it. “So it can just open and close by itself?”

“Well no. You still need to break the block, but it cycles in a new block a few seconds afterward so you don’t need to waste time putting down a new block. Based on our limited space and not wanting to alter his interior too much, there wasn’t much I could do. I mean, it’s a far cry from Keralis’ base.”

“Who?” Tommy tilted his head.

“Uh, friend of mine. Made a home that was easy to hide in. Anyway, again due to limitations, there’s not an infinite amount of blocks in the rotation, but I doubt we would use them all up in one go, so once we’re down here, we can replace them.” Mumbo pointed to where that would be.”

“That’s pretty pog.”

Mumbo was drifting off to sleep when he heard Tommy talking to someone. He couldn’t quite hear the other end of the conversation, but by the tone of Tommy’s voice, it didn’t sound that bad. Until he then heard Tommy suddenly get quiet. Straining his ears, he could hear Tommy whisper shouting. “I have to go! Sorry, sorry! Bye bye bye bye bye! Tommy hole Tommy hole!”

Mumbo didn’t know what to do and ended up just frozen in place, listening. “Uh, ‘ow do?” Then quiet. “Hey take a picture! It’ll last longer! Ay!” That sounded like Tommy antagonizing whoever was there. There was another pause before Tommy spoke once more in a more calm and level tone. “You look ugly.”

“What are you doing in my house Tommy?” Immediately came the response. Mumbo recognized the gruff voice. That had been one of the people to visit Grian. One of his brothers. Oh why couldn’t he remember their name? He was greeted by voices telling him it was Techno before he pushed them away again.

“How are you?”

“What are you doing in my house Tommy?”

“How are you?”

“What are you doing in my house Tommy?!”

“You are a bitch! That’s the way to lightly put it.” A moment later there was the sound of fist meeting skin and Tommy was yelling, finally making Mumbo jump up. But right away it was sounding calm again. “You can’t kill me so stop trying to act so big and hard, alright?”

“I actually really can kill you!”

“Well I have!” “You’re just taking my items!” Well I have!” “That’s not what you have, that’s what I have.” “Yeah bitch, I have fire!” “No wait my house is made out of wood!”

Mumbo got ready to go out there and fight, but before he could, Tommy was climbing down into the room. Above, he could hear Techno yelling about a zombie getting into his villagers. “Tommy, are you alright?” Mumbo asked in a hushed tone.

He didn’t get a response as he immediately clamped a hand on Tommy’s mouth when digging started right above them. Don’t dig down, Mumbo thought. He hoped that Techno would test some blocks and then give up. “What the heck is this?” Too late.

After a moment of hesitation, Techno started coming down the ladder, but the redstone clock finished its timer and a block was pushed into the warrior, starting to suffocate him. “What the?! Tommy!”

Mumbo pulled Tommy behind him. He may not be the best fighter, but he wasn’t going to let Tommy get hurt. Another block was broken and then Techno came the rest of the way down into their room. “What the hell was that Tom-” Techno started to speak before he saw Mumbo. “Who are you?”

“Not important. Don’t you dare try hurting Tommy or you’ll regret it.” Mumbo tried to stand firm, not show any weakness, but he was failing horribly at it.

“What are you two doing in my house?” Techno half growled. He shifted his helmet and Mumbo froze. His eyes were the exact same color as Tommy’s were.

“Hey, this place right here is our house bitch!” Tommy said over Mumbo’s shoulder. “Besides, read the sign bruv, no pussies allowed!”

Techno paused, then pointed to Mumbo. “Then why is he in here?”

“Hey, no talking to my man Mumbo Jumboli like that.”

“Ugh, how long has this been down here?!”

“Well you see there was this guy called Dream and we’ve got this sort of love hate relationship, like Sam and Juliet from the hit show Friends and basically what happened, Technoblade, was uhhh I need my discs back.”

There was a beat of silence before the piglin hybrid spoke. “That was not a good summary at all! Why are you two living underneath my house like raccoons?!”

“Hey!” Mumbo exclaimed, offended by the statement. “I am not some raccoon. Secret bases means you’re just a sewer… related… mole perso- yes I will actually accept being called a racoon.”

Techno raised an eyebrow at Mumbo. “So, who are you? And why are you helping Tommy?”

Mumbo couldn’t easily look Techno in the eyes. “Well you see… I sort of ended up coming through a portal, which got broken. I’m a little stuck and I found Tommy and thought I could help him.”

“Help him get his discs back?”

“I have no idea what he means by that.” Mumbo answered honestly. That hadn’t been brought up while they were walking, so it must be something new. Nevermind, he was now being told it had been mentioned but he wasn’t paying attention like a spoon.

“What, but I talked about it almost the whole way here!” Tommy interjected, making Mumbo nod.

“Yes, I was just told such. I just hadn’t been paying attention. Gathering resources seemed like the best option at the time.”

“And you used that to get redstone?” Techno asked, looking back up the ladder.

“Well no, I just had it on me.”

“You just had redstone materials on you for that?” Mumbo nodded in response to the question. “Why bother?”

“It’s what I had! Had I known I would get stuck, I may have brought less, but it’s still very useful.”

“Sure it- Hey Tommy, where’d you get that golden apple?!” Mumbo looked to where Techno’s eyes had fallen and saw Tommy eating a gold apple.

“Tommy! I told you you are not supposed to be eating that many!”

“But I like the absorption hearts!”

“And that’s exactly why you aren’t supposed to have that many. You’ll get too used to the extra health.”

“Tommy, give me the apples.” Mumbo held out a hand and was surprised how easily they were given to him.

“And those are my apples.” Techno then spoke, grabbing the apples out of Mumbo’s hand.

“Here, Techno. Tommy was put in a bad situation. He came to you as his brother because he sees you as something safe. Or at least safer than what he just left. I wouldn’t be letting him have any of your apples, but he really needs the health benefits and potions are more tedious to keep supplied. I promise we won’t be much of a bother as long as you let us stay.”

Surprisingly, though it was after some hesitation, Techno agreed.

Tommy was chatting to Techno through his communicator when they got warning of Dream coming to visit. Tommy started to panic as Mumbo attempted to calm him down. When Techno walked in, a potion of invisibility was splashed at their feet by Tommy, hitting all of them. Techno fortunately was able to get some milk from the cow in his basement, but the enderman living in his house couldn’t do the same, leaving just the floating block it held.

Techno helped Tommy into a box to hide while Mumbo placed an armor stand down and stood just behind it. It wasn’t the best hiding place, but hopefully it would do well enough, especially after some junk gear was placed on it by Techno.

Mumbo held his breath when Dream noticed particles left by the magic energy of the potion as he stood next to the box, but Techno was able to play it off, mentioning the Stray outside and how one had hit Dream with an arrow. The masked man seemed to buy it as he continued to look around.

“Alright, well there’s a bit of a problem. Tommy left.”

“Tommy?” Mumbo had to hold his hand down so he wouldn’t slap himself at Techno’s question. “Oh right, Tommy. Yeah that guy. He got exiled. That was pretty funny.”

Dream asked to look around again and started checking the different floors. It was perfect timing as well as the splash potion ran out and Mumbo quickly had to supply him and Tommy with another. They started to read a list that Mumbo had heard before and he went down to peek at what was going on, only to see signs on a wall of Tommy’s to-do list. Fortunately nothing directly said Tommy’s name on it, but it likely did read like his writing.

Mumbo heard Tommy start to eat from above, his eyes widening at the fact that he would do something so reckless. He rushed up and stole the food from Tommy and placed it in the boat with the enderman. Dream and Techno arrived only a second later and Dream made a comment about not knowing endermen ate, to which Techno replied with something about someone named Ranboo.

Techno was able to distract Dream with one last thing, ringing a bell above them to the point that Mumbo’s head was left ringing. But then the masked man left. Mumbo watched through a window as Dream glanced at one thing that couldn’t be hidden. A tower nearby that reached up into the sky. It was made of cobble and stone bricks and andesite. It had a lovely spiral staircase so someone could get up to the top and a few wood accents.

Dream stared at it. Had Techno built this? If so why? It might have been Tommy, but that wasn’t his style. Did anyone else know where Techno was and could build something like that? He couldn’t think of anyone. Dream tried not to feel perplexed as he left.

Mumbo also looked at the tower. It was all too obvious who had built it. That was Tommy’s style. Too much cobble with just enough accents to make it look good. Dream likely knew and might come back.

“You two are still invisible. I expected it to wear off by now.”

“I used another while you kept Dream busy. Made sure it didn’t hit your pe- er, roommate.”

“Well, hopefully that was enough to convince him Tommy’s not here.”

“Are you kidding? It’s blatantly obvious. Look at the tower out there.” Mumbo gestured, forgetting he couldn’t be seen, then putting his armor on to make it a little more obvious.

“That thing? That’s probably what’s keeping Tommy safe the most. Doesn’t look like anything he’s made other than the height.”

“What?” Mumbo asked, sounded half exasperated by the claim. “No that’s just how he builds!”

“Do you think I built Logstedshire? That was almost all Wilbur.”

“I wasn’t talking about that! I was talking about-” Then Mumbo remembered. Remembered that they didn’t.

“Talking about what?”

Mumbo wasn’t sure how to tell then, so in a moment of spoonly panic, he blurted out five words. “I’m dating your blood god.”

All was silent for about ten full seconds before Mumbo was being pressed against the wall. “What the hell would you know about the Blood God?”

Mumbo tried to speak, but it was hard as most of the pressure keeping him against the wall was near his throat. “N-name w’s Zlquh… p-parit ‘vian. Tr-triplit.” He gasped for air as he was dropped.

“Where’s Xelqua?”

Though he was still gasping for air, Mumbo managed to answer. “D-Dream has him…”

Zloy looked up as Gxrgeous and Pixlriffs walked in. “I’m hoping you’ve got good news?”

“Far from it actually.” Pixlriffs spoke before Gxrgeous started yelling.

“I can’t see a fucking thing. It has to be fucking vault gods. That world is filled with people they could feed off of.”

Zloy sighed. “Gxrgeous, first of all, they have told us many times that it is not considered ‘feeding’. They’re just people who have an energy that they can interact with better. Second, is that really all there is?”

“Er, no.” Pixlriffs spoke up. “Just before she lost her ability to view in, she saw Grian and Mumbo end up going through the portal and it broke on our side of things.”

That made Zloy look up from the work he was doing. “That really is bad news. Gather as many watchers as you can to try and fix things with Gxrgeous’ world. The sooner we figure out what’s going on, the better.”

#hermit!tommy au #hermit!tommy #tommyinnit #mumbo jumbo #technoblade #grian xelqua #the watchers #zloyxp #pixlriffs

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bloodybigwardrobe · 3 years

Note

for the meta asks for writers: 6, 20, 21! Thanks!

6. What character do you have the most fun writing?

that’s a good question, honestly. because while i write a lot of peter and susan, idk if i would say they’re the most *fun* given the amount of angst i put in there :P i think the most fun is definitely lucy, because she is such a ray of sunshine that i love giving claws and fangs to!

20. Tell us the meta about your writing that you really want to ramble to people about (symbolism you’ve included, character or relationship development that you love, hidden references, callbacks or clues for future scenes?)

i’ve been taking a whole bunch of time trying to sort my brain and fics for this question. it’s been surprisingly hard, because while i write i definitely have sprawling callbacks, references, threads put in for future exploration. but as soon as i’ve taken a step back, it takes ages for me to find it all again. here are a few of them:

- something i tend to do a lot in my fics is connect peter to the sunrise in some form. it’s one of my favourite bits of imagery that i’ve tied to the pevensies and my narnia pieces. here’s a few examples:

“Jack’s heart leaps into his throat when, for a moment, he thinks he sees his late father out of the corner of his eye where Peter ought to be. A memory of watching a sunrise from atop the cliffs with his father occupies him for the next while.” (from odd passengers) “Peter stands, straining under it, and the skies spread out in front and behind him. There is blood painted across his shoulders where the weight digs deep, and cracked edges look for purchase. Crimson seeps into the blue above. Around him, creatures bow and gasp and speak of beauty.” (from tell me, atlas) “When a smile tugged at bloodied lips / To outshine the rising sun with magnificent ease” (from i’ll keep the king ch. 2)

- generally, i enjoy writing about the pevensies in earthly/nature-y ways, if that makes sense? i know, especially in the strange/eerie/gothic pevensie bits that are floating around that’s a trend, and it’s one i absolutely adore and have in majority of my portrayals of them. i’ve a few set bits i relate to each pevensie. some examples: susan has lavender, fresh honey. edmund has moss, soft earth full of roots. lucy has water sunshine, grass stains. peter has iron, spring rain.

- there’s a bit in my zamonia-narnia crossover fic that i desperately wanted to add in for those who haven’t read the zamonia books, but couldn’t figure out how to make it flow with the way the characters are. so i will dissect it here :D

“The boy is a quick learner, clever and witty in his remarks. He takes some time examining what Volzotan knows to be the Rumo card. Volzotan takes eager note of the twitch of the human’s lips as he places the card down and focuses back on Volzotan’s teachings. It’s the only glimpse Volzotan gets of whatever lives behind the poker face.” (from the horrors that i promised you)

edmund is being taught to play the card game rumo in this scene. the rumo card is the most important card in this game, one that is bet on for a 50/50 chance of immense success or complete failure. this attribute of the card is also the reason why volzotan names the book’s protagonist rumo when he trains him up to become an efficient weapon to use against their captors. i just think edmund would see it and find some humour in it. (bonus note while finding this section in the fic i realised i had written “mustering” instead of “examining” because i was thinking of the german word “mustern” which means to inspect/scrutinise. a classic case of a false friend)

- and finally, another bit that’s most obvious in the above mentioned crossover fic is the clean split of giving peter and lucy violence/war/battle/action of that sort and giving susan and edmund the talking/scrutinising/intrigue bits that border on espionage. this is obviously very much based on canon and i know that a lot of other writers do this, but it’s always very fun.

21. What other medium do you think your story would work well as? (film, webcomic, animated series?)

i have such a soft spot for animation! it gives so many options, and i think it would be great to bring the weird wildness of the narnia in my head to life! i also love watercolour comics, and watercolour is absolutely something that’s always in the back of my head when i describe things.

thank you so much for sending these in! sorry for the wait, i had to really contemplate these <3

#narnia #chronicles of narnia #edmund pevensie #peter pevensie #lucy pevensie #susan pevensie #tcon #athoughtfox #mywriting #answered #its been almost a month since you sent this in it's been sitting in my drafts slowly growing since then #cheers for giving me something to really really think about :D

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the-melting-world · 3 years

Text

Strength | Playbook Commentary [Side A]

Need to catch up? The full album can be found here: Strength

Note: Song lyric application may not always correspond with the original meaning / intention of the song’s origins.

Enjoy these breakdowns of the lyrics that influenced and inspired some of the events and imagery used in Strength. All songs with the exception of the Spotify session recording of "We Know Who U R" are borrowed from Blanco White’s albums On the Other Side, Colder Heavens, and Nocturne EP.

cw: none

~ Side A Playlist ~

"Olalla"

"Lie Alone"

"Outsider"

"We Know Who U R"

"I Belong to You"

"On The Other Side"

"Sol"

****

“Olalla”

Lyrics that had the most impact on the chapter:

Olalla more than a name / Rest your eyes and stay in the shade / You are hiding over the hill / In a quiet never so still

From Olalla to the city lights / Somebody told me to believe in better times

Oh Olalla where will you go? / If the line ends out on the road / There's a story meant to be told / When the door is shut in the cold

Commentary

“Olalla more than a name / Rest your eyes and stay in the shade / You are hiding over the hill / In a quiet never so still” – This chapter is all about renewing one’s sense of hope and these lyrics speak of a place (Olalla) that is a beacon of hope and the promise of something better. The time shared between Kip and Khleo in this chapter captures all of these feelings of returning to a place of rest or finally coming upon the place that one has been searching for.

“Somebody told me to believe in better times” – Over the course of their picnic, Kip is steadily pushing Khleo to open up more and more about the things they want. Every time Khleo reveals information, Kip gives some reassurance, which grants Khleo permission to believe in herself and speak openly about the things that she has jealously guarded in the past.

“Oh Olalla where will you go? / If the line ends out on the road / There's a story meant to be told / When the door is shut in the cold” – As much progress as Khleo has made in this chapter, there is still a lot that she has to do. These lyrics imply that this special place (Olalla) may not be the same one day or may stop existing. It creates this feeling of unfinished business in the lines “there’s a story meant to be told” or the possibility of failure in the lines “if the line ends out on the road”. We feel this at the end when Khleo and Kip say goodbye and Khleo goes off on her own even though she doesn’t quite have all the answers.

****

“Lie Alone”

Lyrics that had the most impact on the chapter:

Farewell my room of lies, have you gone at last? / I'm lost not paralyzed, I may never come back / There's no answer in the air, why the lightning struck / You should have known I would not care, every diamond's cut, from the dirt

So I lie alone, and risk each night, I long to let you in / But there's a life I lost, drifted out, before / You let me in

Commentary

“Farewell my room of lies, have you gone at last… I’m lost, not paralyzed” – Khleo is at a crossroads “Farewell to my room of lies”. Their friends are pushing them to leave the tavern, but they resist because it’s all they’ve known for so long and they don’t know where they will draw their strength if everything changes “I’m lost, not paralyzed”. This, as much as their desire to be with Kip, is also a source of their sexual frustration.

“There’s no answer in the air” – Neither Kip and Khleo get any release or “answer” in their efforts to satisfy their individual longing for each other.

“You should have known I would not care. Every diamond’s cut, from the dirt” – This quote sums up Kip’s attitude toward the situation in this chapter. Even though Kip is dissatisfied after the fact, she still has hope that something can come of her feelings for Khleo “every diamond’s cut”, much in the same way something came of her relationship with Asra, which endured so much strain and uncertainty “from the dirt” before they became a serious couple.

“So I lie alone… I long to let you in” – The physical distance between Kip and Khleo does not hold them back so much as Khleo’s individual stubbornness to move on from their old life. Most of the tension building up to this point has been created by Khleo’s ties to the Chandrian.

“There’s a life I lost, drifted out before you let me in” – Kipling is ready to let Khleo in, as we see with her transparency with Asra (whereas before she was very tight-lipped about her feelings about Khleo), but Khleo has one last hurdle to overcome with themself, as seen with their dramatic confrontation with their patron Arcana.

****

“The Outsider”

Lyrics that had the most impact on the chapter:

I'm found out if all I do is hide between the lines, an outsider at the door. / I'm unbound, foreign on a path forever mine, this outsider at the door.

We're confined to be apart / To take sides in divided cells. / We collide when we depart / Don't ask me what's the cost / I don't know myself.

Commentary

“I'm found out if all I do is hide between the lines, an outsider at the door. / I'm unbound, foreign on a path forever mine, this outsider at the door.” – Khleo demonstrates through her confrontation with Otto that she is finally really to transition into the family of grey mages with her friends. However she is an “outsider at the door” in that she is not familiar with this sort of magical territory. The lyrics “foreign on a path forever mine” emphasize what Hefe and Strength have been telling Khleo this whole time – that she’s coming home to something that she knows, but it won’t feel familiar to her at first.

“We're confined to be apart / To take sides in divided cells. / We collide when we depart” – These lyrics echo the relationship between Khleo and her friends. They were separated “confined to be apart” and didn’t cross each other’s paths for many years “divided cells”. But as shown in the way they leave their comfort zones and come together, their reunion is very explosive “we collide when we depart”

****

“We Know Who U R”

Lyrics that had the most impact on the chapter:

Tree don't care what the little bird sings / We go down with the dew in the morning light / The tree don't know what the little bird brings / We go down with the dew in the morning

And we breathe it in / There is no need to forgive / Breathe it in / There is no need to forgive / Again

And we know who you are, and we know where you live / And we know there's no need to forgive

Commentary

“Tree don't care what the little bird sings / We go down with the dew in the morning light / The tree don't know what the little bird brings / We go down with the dew in the morning” – These lyrics capture the nostalgia and simplicity of Khleo’s childhood in the Melting World. Also, the more time she spends with Ozy, the more comfortable she becomes around him until talking to him feels as natural as, say, taking a morning walk through the grass and listening to the birds.

“And we breathe it in / There is no need to forgive / Breathe it in / There is no need to forgive / Again” – Once again emphasizes the way Ozy and Khleo reconnect and how she forgives him for losing her to the Door when they were kids. Towards the end when Ozy asks Khleo for forgiveness, she chides him saying that she’s already forgiven him.

“And we know who you are, and we know where you live / And we know there's no need to forgive” – Much of the same, the only difference is that these quotes echo Ozy’s initial hope/belief that Khleo would forgive him because of the unconditional love she showed him when they were children during a time when no one was willing to give Ozy a chance.

****

“I Belong to You”

Lyrics that had the most impact on the chapter:

Could we craft a Sundance through the night? / Coals aglow / In our eyes, free of souls / In our hearts / Red blood beat forever

Tired as we are / When I wake, steal the dawn / Lead my mind, hear me call / I see no other

Divided coast surrounds me now / In lines below / And my thoughts are hijacked out of sight / Left to roam / In a sky full of stars / Left alone, could they shine forever?

Commentary

“Could we craft a Sundance through the night? / Coals aglow / In our eyes, free of souls / In our hearts / Red blood beat forever” – These lyrics reflect the excitement and fire that burns between Kip and Khleo when they’re finally alone together.

“Tired as we are / When I wake, steal the dawn” – Ironically, even though Kip and Khleo get away to rest up, they become more focused on taking advantage of their privacy.

“Lead my mind, hear me call / I see no other” – Kip and Khleo are so zeroed in on each other that they don’t really see where they’re going until Khleo bumps into the antique dresser.

“And my thoughts are hijacked out of sight / Left to roam / In a sky full of stars / Left alone, could they shine forever?” – These quotes capture the euphoric atmosphere created at the end of the chapter where Khleo is inebriated with Kip’s magic. It emphasizes Khleo’s permanent distance from magic, but also that it’s something that she has always been in awe of and appreciated. Even more now given that she’s gotten closer to Kip.

****

“On the Other Side”

Lyrics that had the most impact on the chapter:

There’s a race to the summit's cold heights / You got to work to play the game / Not knowing when the end is in sight

The sun hides on the other side until you feel it, raise a distant call / So for now, it's only a long night, can't go on and on

Commentary

“There’s a race to the summit's cold heights / You got to work to play the game / Not knowing when the end is in sight” – The “race” mentioned here connects to Ozy’s implication that he and his friends are in a race against time when it comes to mastering the Doors. More ideas associated with Ozy are echoed in lyrics like “play the game” and “not knowing”. Ozy often speaks about external conflict as if it’s a game meant to be played or a puzzle that requires solving. Yet he is very clear on when there are gaps in his own knowledge when it comes to the challenges that he faces.

“The sun hides on the other side until you feel it, raise a distant call / So for now, it's only a long night, can't go on and on” – In these lyrics, the title of the song comes up. “On the other side” refers to a lot of things not only in this chapter, but throughout Khleo’s journey. Khleo was the one who was singled out and taken to her patron Arcana’s realm before Kip or Ozy. This concept of crossing into a different plane in order to receive something that Khleo’s not getting in her daily life prevails through her album. And in most cases, this separate plane was Strength’s gate. In this chapter specifically, the “other side” refers to the dark Room that Ozy and Kip have secured that is filled with monsters. There is also another nod to Ozy in these lyrics with “the sun hides on the other side”. The mention of the sun waiting for the singer echoes this image of Ozy (whose patron is the Sun) waiting for Khleo to rise from her rest and answering the call to take on the next task in her personal journey.

****

“Sol”

Lyrics that had the most impact on the chapter:

Further south / Where I was young / And caught up / In the skies on the way / I see them now

Maybe time has the key / To one last door / Where our eyes cannot meet / Without being sure / That the sound had always / Run inside us / From a start out of reach / I see it now

Commentary

“Where I was young / And caught up / In the skies on the way / I see them now” – Khleo has finally reached the point where she can see into her past and understand the role she will play as a grey mage. She’s no longer “caught up” in the cycle of pain and struggle from working at the Chandrian.

“Maybe time has the key / To one last door / Where our eyes cannot meet / Without being sure / That the sound had always / Run inside us / From a start out of reach / I see it now” – A lot of imagery associated with the Door Lords’ journey are in these lyrics, such as “time”, “door”, and the inability to reconnect because of uncontrollable outside forces. Once again with the repetition of “I see it now”, it emphasizes Khleo’s understanding of her journey and the enlightenment that she has collectively gained from her patron Arcana, as well as her interactions with Kipling, Asra, and Ozy.

#last bit of lore for the album #the arcana #album lore #arcana albums #arcana albums: strength #khlee von heine

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nexttrickanvils · 3 years

Text

Beware of Karen Ch. 2

Sorry this took so long, had other priorities but here is the long awaited chapter 2 of Beware of Karen.

Summary: After Guybrush and Stan fail to deal with the latter’s ex-wife, Elaine decides to throw her hat into the ring. It goes about as well as you expect. ---------

Elaine hummed to herself as she set the table. While Guybrush was admittedly the better cook of the two, she still wanted to surprise her Pikaroni with a nice romantic dinner. Preferably without a certain plaid wearing charlatan joining them.

While Elaine had nothing against Stan… well okay maybe she had a lot against Stan… but that wasn’t the point, she’d prefer if he hadn’t attempted to drag her and Guybrush in an ex-lover’s quarrel of all things.

But she trusted Guybrush’s wit and uncanny ability to find absurd but simple solutions to absurd problems.

Before long, she could hear footsteps on the deck, she quickly lit the candles and plated the food.

“Welcome back, sugarboots! I hope you’re...”

The door opened and in came Guybrush… and Stan.

“Hey honey! Ooh are those potstickers I smell?”

“...Guybrush… I thought you were going to help Stan with his ex-wife and thus he would not bother us.” Elaine said, gritting her teeth

Guybrush, to his credit, looked apologetic.

“Well I did try, I honestly did but well… let’s just say Stan wasn’t exaggerating about how awful Karen is. So I guess Stan will be staying with us until Karen leaves.”

Elaine groaned and pinched the bridge of her nose. Guybrush sighed and placed his hands on her shoulders.

“I know, I was really excited for all the quality time too but Elaine, you have no idea just how evil this woman is. I couldn’t just leave Stan to fend for himself against her, I’m a pirate not a monster!”

“...Really? And please do tell me, what makes her so terrible that Stan has to go in hiding with us?” Elaine asked, clearly unconvinced

“Well first: I could barely breathe around her stall, the perfume she was selling was that thick! She was also really pushy with the sales pitch like waaaaay worse than Stan. She also kept making all these mean comments about me being a terrible husband and how our marriage would fall apart if I didn’t buy her stuff. And she threatened to call the island authorities on Stan if he even thought of setting up shop near her! And he didn’t even do anything!”

Elaine raised an eyebrow, “Hm, I admit she does actually sound awful. But being pushy and rude are hardly the crimes of the century, sweetie.”

“Oh it goes beyond “pushy and rude.”” remarked Stan, mouth full of potstickers

“Karen thrives on “the hunt.” All she cares about is her next sale!"

"...Sounds like you." Elaine and Guybrush both remarked

"Oh no no no, my friends. I admit that Ol' Stan here may have exaggerated or cut some corners here and there. But hey sometimes that's what you gotta do when your clientele are a buncha rowdy swashbucklers!"

Stan continued, while grabbing another pot sticker, "Karen on the other hand… she has no respect for the art of sales, it's all a means to an end for her. And if anyone gets in the way of that precious end sale even if it’s only in her mind, she will destroy you! By the way, these are amazing, you could make a killing selling these.”

Once again, Elaine found herself not entirely convinced. Stan stuffing himself with the food she made for herself and Guybrush didn’t help his case. But he also couldn’t really be considered a reliable narrator. And Guybrush, her dear Threepy, the love of her life… well he was quite prone to exaggeration.

Elaine sighed, well she wouldn’t be where she was now if she just sat and complained about a bad situation.

“Perhaps… I should speak to her…”

“NO!” Shouted both Guybrush and Stan

She just gave them a confident smile, “Oh don’t worry about me. I’m sure if I went without Stan, she won’t be as volatile. And besides, all my years as governor has given me quite the experience of negotiating with stubborn egotistic business owners. You remember that incident at the O'Malley's Galley last year, don’t you dear?”

Guybrush let out a small laugh and a blush, obviously remembering how Elaine dealt with the restaurant's owner after the man refused Guybrush's request to not serve the food on porcelain plates.

Elaine kissed Guybrush on the cheek, "I'll be fine dear. You just relax and I'll come back with the good news."

Then she looked over at Stan, "...And I suppose you just do what you can to entertain yourself."

And with that, Elaine made her way off the boat and into town. As she made her way, she kept rehearsing in her head how she'd calmly confront Karen.

However when Elaine arrived and started asking the other merchants about Karen, a feeling of dread began to form.

They were all smiles and sales until Elaine explained who she was looking for. They all suddenly dropped their grins and immediately apologized to Elaine for "wasting her time."

The most concerning interaction was from one merchant who told Elaine where Karen was then immediately begged her to not tell Karen that the two of them spoke.

Before long, Elaine found the woman of the hour making a sale.

"Trust me, dearie, this color and this scent are perfect for you! You'll be catching everyone's eye in no time!"

The female pirate grinned as she paid for her goods.

"Just remember, no refunds on used products."

"Yeah yeah yeah. Look out, Single's Night, Mama's coming!"

Elaine stepped aside to let the lady walk by then she took a deep breath and steeled herself.

"Excuse me? Are you Karen?"

"Hm?"

Elaine felt a shiver down her spine when Karen smiled at her.

“Well hello there, my dear! Whatever you need, I’ve got it.”

“Actually I’m not here to shop. You met my husband earlier? Guybrush Threepwood?”

“Ohhh! So he gave you the free sample? I knew you couldn’t resist! A woman of your taste would know fine class when you see it.”

Karen chuckled as she immediately looked through her inventory while Elaine was already finding her patience tested.

“Please just listen to me. I understand that your relationship with your ex-husband is… strained but it’s gotten to the point where he’s hiding on my and my husband’s ship trying to get away from you.”

“Hmph, Stan, being an absolute freeloader? You don’t say. Anyway…!”

To Elaine’s surprise, Karen grabbed her face.

“H-hey!”

“Hm, you look like a spring or autumn to me.”

Elaine quickly pushed her off though if that bothered Karen, she didn’t show it and went straight back to her sales pitch.

“Now your face is rather pale, you look like a ghost, dearie! Oh and you need to ditch that bandana, it clashes with your hair."

"Would you just LISTEN to me! I am not here to buy anything! Or to get make-up advice. Or whatever you think I'm here for! I need for you and Stan to reconcile whatever is going on with you two so my husband and I can be alone!"

With that, Karen just laughed.

"Oh you poor innocent sucker. There is no reconciling with that selfish mess of a man. But that's marriage for you, the minute the wifey has a problem, she's suddenly a nagging witch, am I right?"

Elaine's patience was growing thinner and thinner as she crossed her arms and glared at Karen.

"Fine. You two just can't get along, just fine. But at the very least just let Stan be. My husband and I have been looking forward to a nice romantic vacation and we can't exactly do that with Stan around.

Karen smirked and Elaine once again felt an icy chill.

"Oh really? And what do you think your "dear" husband and Stan are doing while they sent you to do their dirty work?"

"I volunteered…"

Karen continued, ignoring Elaine's correction, "They're probably just lazing about on the deck, pigging out on junk and guzzling grog. I was one of the lucky ones. I realized what a scam the whole marriage thing is and got out of there. I've still got my divorce lawyer's card, you know, when you realize that you don't need to settle with that blonde idiot."

Karen pulled out a card and placed it into Elaine's pocket. Without hesitation, Elaine grabbed Karen's wrist with an iron grip.

"HEY!!!"

“Now listen here, you can insult me all you want but my husband is a good man. He may have his moments but that goes for anyone. Do you know what we've faced off against together? Some of the fiercest pirates on the Seven Seas including the undead monster LeChuck. A real estate developer with delusions of grandeur who had the power to make mice out of men. A mad scientist obsessed with eternal life! Guybrush even conquered DEATH! And through all that, Guybrush has always been respectful, caring, and loving!”

Elaine let go of Karen's wrist but kept her steely glare on her.

"My husband may not be perfect but I cannot see myself with anyone else. Now I believe our business is done here."

Karen rubbed her wrist as she gave Elaine her own glare.

"Hmph, I suppose it is. But I am a forgiving sort. I'd be happy to help you once you figure things out."

Refusing to dignify Karen's response, Elaine simply turned around and walked away.

As Elaine stepped out of the marketplace, a shrill scream filled the air.

She looked toward the noise and saw the female pirate from earlier desperately trying to shake off two monkeys climbing all over her.

Elaine quickly came to the woman's rescue, shooing the monkeys away from her, giving the other pirate enough time… to dunk her head in the nearby fountain.

Whatever that did, it seemed to cause the monkeys to lose interest and run off.

"Oh thank Blackbeard's frilly underthings."

"Are… you okay?"

"Yeah, yeah I will be."

"What in the world even happened?"

"Oh I'll tell ye what happened! I went to the bar to get ready for Single's Night and put on somea that goop that fast-talking she-devil sold me. Next thing I knew, the bar's monkey mascots were all over me."

"...And you're certain that it was the make-up that caused this?"

"DO I LOOK LIKE SOMEONE A MONKEY'D BE ATTRACTED TO TO YA!? They left me alone just fine then I put on that damn perfume and other stuff and they went crazy! "You'll be catching everyone's eyes in no time" apparently that includes mangy beasts!"

The other pirate stood up and emptied her bag of Karen's products. She then walked away, grumbling about her wasted money and time.

Maybe it was Guybrush's influence but Elaine couldn't help but pick up a couple of the fallen cosmetics.

Eventually Elaine made her way back to the Screaming Narwhal. Guybrush and Stan were on the deck though unlike Karen's prediction, Guybrush was practicing his banjo playing while Stan just read a book.

Guybrush immediately noticed Elaine walking onto the deck and smiled. At least Elaine had that.

"Plunderbunny! So um… how did it go?"

"...I apologize, you were both right. She's the absolute worst, how do we get rid of her?"

#Monkey Island #Anvil Writings

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random-thought-depository · 3 years

Text

So, in my last post I wrote this:

“Like … right now I’m planning out a story I intend to write in January; it’s supposed to be a kind of deconstruction of the Fremen mirage, and very much one of the thoughts going into it is “yo, a Proud Warrior Race would be a horrible society to live in or have as neighbors, we shouldn’t romanticize them!” and yet … I feel that the “bad guy” culture in it is much better, from a literary viewpoint, for me having given some thought to the material base of their society and how that would shape their culture. I could have just written them as flat edgelordy-grimdark barbarians, but thinking about their culture in materialist terms gave me a more complex and nuanced picture that I think will make for a more interesting and nuanced story and a fictional society that feels more interesting and human and alive.”

So, I want to infodump a little about this fictional culture I’ve thought up! I’m splitting this up into two posts because otherwise it’d be long in a way my Tumblr’s format is not kind to; in the first post I’m going to talk about the material base that defines this fictional society I’ve thought up, and in the second post I’m going to talk about more historically contingent features of their culture.

Note: for a lot of what’s in this post, I tried to make something hard SF-ish, but much of what I’ve written was the result of kind of “working backwards” from the sort of culture I was imagining to a material base that might create such a culture. So this is more playing with an idea than an attempt at anything particularly realistic.

Material base:

The basic political and economic unit of this society is the semi-self-sufficient space habitat community. These communities are about the size of a small town, I’m thinking thousands to tens of thousands of people (though I haven’t quite fixed it firmly, and anyway there’s wide variation; more successful communities are bigger). This town-size community lives in a semi-mobile space habitat, which I’m thinking is more-or-less a hollow cylinder spun for centrifugal gravity attached to a central spindle which is spacecraft construction facilities, engines, etc.. This space habitat contains enough hydroponic gardens, industrial machinery, etc. that the habitat can sustain itself completely independently for at least a few years. The space habitat has a rocket engine and a hyperspace engine, so it’s mobile, and these people are at least semi-nomadic, often moving their habitats when faced with opportunity or danger. The space habitat carries smaller spacecraft that can be detached and sent out to mine asteroids and KBO-type bodies, scoop helium 3 up from gas giant atmospheres, etc. and return these resources to the main habitat. Along with a closed life support system and efficient recycling, this makes such a community almost self-sufficient (though the almost qualifier is important, as I’ll discuss later).

People who are remembering Brett Devereaux’s last essay here may have noted a certain parallel with steppe nomads, with the main habitat being kind of analogous to the mobile but vulnerable main nomad camp where the non-combatants, livestock, and valuables are kept while the smaller resource-gatherer etc. craft are kinda analogous to the highly mobile horse-mounted war parties.

The reason these communities are so small is that their economies are not resource-limited but machinery-limited, labor-limited, and skilled specialized labor limited. Most raw materials these people may need are super-abundant to them, the bottleneck is transforming those raw materials into air, food, machinery, furniture, useful energy, etc. and maintaining efficient almost-closed loops of recycling. Sustaining a space community requires lots of complex machinery and lots of specialized skilled labor, and maintaining and replacing the machinery often requires more complex machinery (tools to make the tools) and more specialized skilled labor. Keeping humans alive in space is hard, so the return on investment from this is low. Therefore, these communities generally try to make efficient use of labor and maintain more-or-less the smallest viable population.

This implies reproduction within communities like this will probably be carefully controlled. A community like this must stay within a delicate balance; they must have enough people to do all the necessary labor with a comfortable safety margin to avoid situations like the only person with some important skill dying unexpectedly before they could train their replacement, but they must not have so many people that they strain the life support capacity of their habitat. That suggests reproduction usually tightly and deliberately controlled to stay at more-or-less replacement rate and no more.

It also implies a community like this will probably be quite communitarian and disciplined. Consumption will have to be tightly controlled. The means of production will probably be directly controlled by the political leadership. Its economy would probably look communist-ish to us, or maybe like a Bronze Age palace economy, with most necessities and luxuries being distributed basically as rations. Commercial transactions will be marginal to the internal economies of these communities; they’ll probably exist, but only in the form of informal mostly small-scale barter (think something similar to the cigarette economy that may exist in a prison), and they will not be anyone’s primary occupation or source of subsistence or power. Internal economic inequality within a community like this will be mostly a matter of status, not wealth; if somebody eats better it’s because they receive more and better food as an entitlement associated with their political office and/or social status, not because they own a big pile of gold that they use to buy food or something. Probably a community like this will be fairly economically egalitarian even if it is socio-politically unequal; if there’s a king he might have a somewhat bigger apartment, somewhat more and better food, a nice wardrobe of good-quality clothes with lots of bling, etc., but the difference in access to resources between him and one of his servants would be trivial compared to the difference in access to resources between me and a billionaire.

OK, but these people are supposed to be “bad guys” and a “Proud Warrior Race,” so where does that come in? Well, now let’s look at the economy of a community like this and ask: what might they need to get from other communities, and by extension what might they want to violently steal from outsiders?

Certainly not raw resources! If they want water, nitrogen, deuterium, iron, copper, platinum, etc. they can just send out a mining ship to an asteroid or KBO-like body to get some and bring it to them. If they want helium 3 they can just send out a scoop-ship to go down into the atmosphere of the nearest gas giant, gather some up, and bring it to them. And so on. Raw resources are mostly super-abundant to a culture like this and it would make no sense to risk injury or death stealing them from armed outsiders (there are a few exceptions to this that prove the rule, more on that later). So, if not raw resources, what?

Remember that their economy is machinery-limited. They need lots of complex machinery to survive, and then they need more complex machinery to repair and replace that complex machinery (tools to make the tools), and then sometimes they need tools to make the tools to make the tools, and so on. If each community had to be completely self-sufficient this might spiral out unmanageably. But it becomes much more manageable if they are just mostly self-sufficient and tap into larger commercial/industrial networks, e.g. a mostly planet-dwelling society with some orbital infrastructure and asteroid mining that has millions of people. Then if there’s the occasional hard to make spare part they can’t make themselves, it’s not a big deal, they can just send a trading expedition to get some of those parts from outsiders every ten years or so. Or if there’s some hard to make anti-viral drug they can’t make themselves, again, no big deal, they can just send a trading expedition to get some of it from outsiders every few years. A trading expedition ... or a raiding expedition.

Probably they would usually prefer to trade, humans usually prefer sharing or trading to violent theft because it’s less risky, violent theft means the possibility of injury or death (plus in this case complex machinery would be likely to get smashed up in a violent heist). A mutually beneficial trading relationship between a culture like this and a planet-dweller culture would be quite natural; to these people a planet-dweller society is rich in labor but poor in mineral resources such as platinum, while to planet-dwellers this space-dweller culture is rich in mineral resources but poor in labor and certain kinds of machinery and high value added finished goods. But here we have a potential basis for a culture that follows a Viking-style strategy of “if they outgun us, trade, if we outgun them, raid,” with the consequence of this culture’s relationship to other societies being a mix of trade and war.

Some raw resources may be worth stealing here; exceptions that prove the rule that for a space-dwelling culture like this raw resources aren’t worth stealing but value-added finished goods may be. For example, it’s theoretically possible to sift small quantities of naturally occurring antimatter from gas giant magnetic fields, and that stuff might be valuable for catalyzing fusion reactions. That might be worth stealing, because in a sense it’s a raw resource that’s kind of like a finished good; the difficulty is concentrating the very diffuse stuff; an antimatter capture facility with its Penning traps almost full might be worth raiding in the same way a big hoard of gathered acorns might be worth raiding for hunter-gatherers (this resource is abundant but diffuse, somebody else has taken the trouble to gather a lot of it into one spot, you can effectively appropriate their hard work by stealing the hoard). Similarly I could see this culture opportunistically intercepting freighters carrying helium 3, mined semi-refined asteroid material, etc., not so much stealing the resources as functionally stealing the labor of gathering and refining the resources.

There’s another thing a community like this might want to take from outsiders: people.

The economy of a community like this is also skilled specialized labor limited. In fact, that’s probably the more fundamental bottleneck: they can’t build and operate all the machinery they need to be truly self-sufficient because they don’t have the skilled specialist labor, and this is an equilibrium trap because trying to create more skilled specialist labor has a low return on investment for them; keeping a human alive in space is resource-intensive, and a new human probably won’t begin to give them a return on the investment for at least 15 years or so, likely longer (skilled specialized labor, so think e.g. doctors and engineers and literal rocket scientists; training them will take time). One way a community like this can adjust the equation to be more in its favor is to acquire skilled specialized laborers who have already been raised and trained by a different community; then they can skip all the investment in the child and go straight to benefiting from the labor of the fully trained adult.

There’s another reason a community like this might want to take people: genetic diversity. We’re talking about a small community, maybe a few tens of thousands of people, that is somewhat isolated. Inbreeding and lack of genetic diversity can kill small and isolated communities. As I said earlier, reproduction in a community like this will probably be extensively controlled, and I think one aspect of that might be controlling marriages to eliminate or minimize the risks associated with inbreeding. But it would be helpful if a community like this could assimilate some outsiders every generation, to increase its genetic diversity. So the community may want to assimilate even outsiders who don’t have any particularly in-demand specialist skills, to boost its genetic diversity.

Note: while this is a setting where aliens exist, it’s one that’s demographically dominated by humans, so most of the foreigners these people interact with will be other humans. This is significant here.

These two motivations synergize with each other. Most obviously, assimilating a skilled specialist outsider increases the community’s skilled specialist labor pool and also the community’s genetic diversity. But also, because of dynamics adjacent to Baumol’s cost disease, even relatively “unskilled” labor would be valuable in a community like this. Somebody who cleans toilets frees up somebody else to be e.g. a doctor or a nuclear engineer, in a much more reliable and direct way than is the case in a high-population capitalist society like ours. So even assimilating a relatively “unskilled” outsider could both increase the community’s genetic diversity and give it a real economic boost (as with a skilled specialist, compared to creating a new worker through natural reproduction and education, it’s a significant savings to the community if the new worker has been raised to adulthood by a different community).

I’m putting “unskilled” in quotes here cause I think when people say “unskilled” when talking about labor often what they are really talking about is “skills that are taught outside formal school institutions” or “skills that are transmitted but not taught.” I think “unskilled” in this sense is often a political term used to devalue people’s labor and justify people being paid little, worked hard, exposed to unpleasant working conditions, etc., so I don’t like using it ... but I can’t think of a better word to quickly communicate the concept I want to communicate here; I must work with the language my culture has given me. But I’ll put it in quotes here, to indicate I’m not using the concept uncritically.

Aside: you might think that a labor-limited community would make lots of use of robots and other automation, but I’m not sure that’d be true of these people. You’d think a futuristic super-Roomba would be a labor savings compared to a person with a simpler hand-pushed vacuum cleaner, but what about all the labor and machinery needed to make the Roomba? A Roomba represents a strategy of investing secondary sector labor to save tertiary sector labor, and that makes sense if you’ve got a big population and can build big factories so you can benefit from economies of scale, but it might not work as well for almost-self-sufficient small communities. A Roomba factory may be worth it if it saves the labor of a million human cleaners, but what about if it saves the labor of 100 human cleaners? A human is a very useful general-purpose gadget that can replace many specialized gadgets. So I think, counterintuitively, in a community like this you might actually see a lot of theoretically relatively easily automated manual labor being done by humans. This would synergize with a strategy of assimilating some relatively “unskilled” outsiders to increase genetic diversity; these people must be fed, given air to breathe, etc. like everyone else, so it would make sense to try to take advantage of their “as a human, they are a very useful general-purpose gadget that can replace many specialized gadgets” feature. Remember, this is a community that would want to make efficient use of labor and that would want to maintain approximately replacement rate reproduction.

As I said, humans generally prefer sharing or trading to violent theft, because violent theft is risky, and I think that would probably apply here too. Space communities like this would likely have traditions of peacefully “trading” people with each other. One relatively nice way this might happen is e.g. every ten years communities exchange groups of young volunteer emigrants. A less nice way is something like a political leader selling another community’s political leader a doctor and receiving as payment two relatively “unskilled” but young, pretty, and fertile women to be brides for his sons. But again, where trade is a possibility, violent theft is also a possibility. So along with stealing machinery and value-added finished goods, a primary goal of raiding may be capturing people; especially skilled specialists such as doctors, nuclear engineers, etc., but anyone who looks like they might make a good slave might be opportunistically abducted.

If this is starting to sound like nightmare fuel, you’re not wrong, but there is one significant mitigating factor. Remember that the most high-value and sought-after captives would be skilled specialists such as doctors, nuclear engineers, etc.. This is the kind of work where trying to extract labor from people by simple brutality doesn’t work well. You can’t just whip a computer programmer to make them code faster, and you really don’t want to anger the person who fixes the machine that makes the air you breathe, one of the people who tend the nuclear reactor that creates energy for your community, or the person who might do surgery on you. So the experience of being captured and enslaved by these people will often be less chain gang or Gor novel stuff and more “You are given a small but comfortable apartment, decent food, and moderate work assignments. It is made clear to you that bad things will happen to you if you make trouble or don’t work. If you obey your captors and do the work they tell you to do, they will be nice to you and treat you well. Their ultimate plan is to get you to become accustomed to your new life, make friends, get a boyfriend or girlfriend and make a child or three with them, and in this way become sufficiently invested in your new community that you wouldn’t want to go home even if you could.”

Of course, let’s not be too charitable to people who are basically enslavers; that’s how relatively high-value captives are treated, less valued captives are at much more risk of physical and sexual abuse, reproductive coercion, and unsafe and unpleasant working and living conditions.

If you’ve read James C. Scott’s The Art of Not Being Governed and Against The Grain, this may remind you a little of Mr. Scott’s thesis that for much of the history of civilization states were labor-limited, not land-limited. Mr. Scott’s work was a big inspiration to me when I was imagining this culture. Someday I might make a post talking about how I think “the purpose of war isn’t to acquire resources, it’s to acquire people, infrastructure, and machinery” is one of the more plausible paradigms for war in space, but this is long enough so I’ll leave that for another day.

Earlier I drew an analogy between the resource gatherer ships of these people and the war parties of steppe nomads. The context I’ve described here makes the analogy much better. Communities like this won’t just carry resource gatherer ships, but also raiding ships, built for raiding and heavily armed. This also implies violence will be a substantial factor in the life of a community like this; either they will have a significant class of professional warriors, or raiding and preparing for raiding will be a significant part of the average person’s life. I’m going with the first option, which is how you get a Proud Warrior Race instead of weekend-warrior types; as is usual in cases like this, the “Proud Warrior Race” is actually a specific privileged class within this society, and when you read that they are proud you should think of it in that context. I’ll talk about that a lot more in my next post, in which I’ll talk about these people as a culture instead of just as an economy.

#my writing #worldbuilding #James C. Scott #my big ideas #cw: slavery #cw: rape #cw: reproductive coercion #space #hard SF #warning: long #Artemis of the airless vastness

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lovelyirony · 4 years

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Lyric prompt! "With no-one wearing their real face It's a whiteout of emotion And I've only got my brittle bones to break the fall"

Tony Stark was in the nearly-brand-new luxury car that his father Howard was driving. His mother had put in a tape of Tchaikovsky’s The Nutcracker and Tony was nowhere to be found.

They think he died in the woods due to a substantial amount of blood found soaked into snow, and the fact that it was on a twisty road with no help coming until the following day, and the temperature was well and truly freezing.

It was snowing. Snow covered tracks.

They technically never found Tony Stark. He was the cause of multiple conspiracy theories, such as:

1.) He had died earlier and the Starks had been replacing him until it was impossible to. His double’s name was Arno, which was a name that was very unfortunate and also quite ugly.

2.) Tony Stark, unable to deal with the pressures of his life, had run away and was currently running a coffee shop in Portland. This was substantiated with a picture of a barista with remarkable similarities, and the article got substantial clout on the internet until the barista, named Robert, had said “please take this down all I’m doing is loving my wife and making coffee I can’t handle much more than that.”

3.) Tony Stark had run away from his life and the strained relationship with his parents (complete with picture analysis), and wanted to live his life in peace and quiet by himself and maybe have a regular existence while also lying low in the shadows and taking care of corporate criminals.

The last one didn’t gain much traction. But it was the only one that was correct.

(The last theory is credited to WARMACHINEROX, all caps and no spaces.)

Tony Stark became Tony Jarvis, and while people say he looks similar to the late Howard Stark, he laughs it off and says that he was raised in upstate New York with cozy sweaters and a loving aunt and uncle who made the best damn hot chocolate in the state.

People do not question this because outside of New York City, there really is nothing to learn about unless you’re into that sort of thing. And most people who ask are not.

Tony Jarvis owns his own coffee shop that also doubles as a record/bookshop, because he is nothing if not resourceful. He always seems to have just the record you were looking for, or the right book to gift to a friend in times of trouble. (Whether or not you have known about it.)

Kids walk down every Friday to treat themselves to a cookie and a book, sitting quietly and smiling as Tony asks them about class and helps out with math homework. He wears nice cardigans and talks to their parents when they’ve arrived. He likes dogs. And he wears scarves when it gets really cold.

Of course Tony also tracks down corporate criminals and tends to make a right mess of things in a roundabout way, but he will take the occasional Saturday off to go to the farmers’ market and get a fresh bouquet of flowers, fresh-baked bread, and a nice blend of coffees from the shop down the street.

It’s fun, really. Amusing at its most dangerous.

They call him Iron Man. Might be because he’s designed a flying suit that he flies around in and his ability to get through systems is amazing, but more amazing is the fact that no one can get through his.

Well, the only person who could--Colonel Rhodes--says the system is too complicated and it would take years to understand.

Rhodes goes by Rhodey and is a great friend of Tony Jarvis. He reads to the children who want it on Friday and likes coffee. He also likes beating Tony at his game and ruining his strategies online.

But he won’t crack the codes needed, and Tony likes that.

Why did Tony become someone else? The answer is simple: he didn’t trust anyone that was in his life save for Edwin and Ana, and perhaps his mother. (But his mother would never leave someone like Howard. Tony’s not sure she even could.)

There was underground dealings. Hydra agents that were supposed to be dead landing in profitable positions. And the pesky little fact that Tony didn’t like the way that Obadiah Stane handled things and was evasive and weird and he had a strange look about him.

This doesn’t necessarily make him a villain.

At least, until Tony found the files that were ordering an assassination hit on his family.

And then he faked his death. Or his disappearance. Whatever.

Now he’s wanted by the US government and SHIELD, the former of which is not important because they have the skillset of a toddler. SHIELD is much more important as they tend to hire people who are skilled, which is unfortunate for Tony.

They hire people like Natasha Romanov, the Black Widow and the woman who gets front row tickets to see Rihanna. She has that type of energy, which Tony knows and is scared of.

They have Bruce Banner on retainer, the scientist who is so blisteringly smart that Tony thinks if he ever sees him in real life, he’s gonna have to wear sunglasses.

They also have Falcon. Enough said.

Steve Rogers isn’t so much a threat because Tony is pretty sure that he could see “look at that!” and his head would turn in that direction, allowing a clean getaway. But Rogers can have the occasional good strategy. (More than occasional.)

And Winter Soldier. Bucky Barnes. Oh, he’s cute. And dangerous. Mostly cute though.

“He’s gonna kill you,” Rhodey reminds Tony, pushing a new shipment of books onto the shelves. “He’s gonna kill you and you’re gonna let him because when you like someone you think everything about them is cute and good.”

“If he finds me,” Tony sniffs. “Of all the bookshops in New York, you think he’s gonna walk into this one?”

As a matter of fact, yes he is. Bucky Barnes is not really the type of guy to have his life together. He knows how to fix a sink and make the pipes work better, and so he gets a discount on his apartment’s rent.

But he thinks that he’s all-together while conveniently forgetting that he was trained for combat and not to be a human being and it’s not all that smooth, going from being a machine to being human.

He forgets he has to buy coffee.

This culminates in him realizing he has no hobbies outside SHIELD and Steve recommends finding a bookshop.

So he does.

The man who is running it is nice. He has glasses, a kind smile, and jams his hands into his cardigan.

(His brain whispers that he’s doing it to not give himself away.

Bucky ignores this because regular humans do a lot of things that aren’t like his targets.

He should not have ignored this. Or maybe he still should. Either way.)

Tony Jarvis is Tony Jarvis. No one else knows that up until about eight years ago, Tony Jarvis did not exist.

And he’s looking at Bucky Barnes, who has quite the record for successful targets and also has a nice smile, apparently.

(He’s wondering when the dental work was done. Honestly, he is.)

“I’m...new to the area,” Bucky says. “And my friend suggested that I find a bookshop and sit down to read. Any recommendations?”

“What’s your favorite genre?” Tony asks, as if he doesn’t know that it’s science-fiction and also mysteries. (Peggy liked to talk.)

“I like mysteries. And science-fiction,” Bucky says.

“Well then, I have some recs for you,” Tony answers, turning. ��Let me get them to you. Also, do you like chocolate chip or oatmeal for cookies? They’re complementary for first visits.”

“You can tell when someone first visits?” Bucky asks.

“I have a good memory, and I would’ve remembered someone like you,” Tony says.

(he’s so glad he’s faced away. his face is firetruck red and it’s not because he’s been blasting the heat ever since the temperatures dropped)

The shop itself is cozy. Bucky gets sucked into a book about a space criminal. He’s never read anything like it, and he loves the way it’s written.

He buys it and tucks it under his arm as he hears a soft chime from his phone.

Meeting about the problem. be there asap

Bucky sighs, chewing the oatmeal cookie that he was given.

He nearly drops it from his mouth.

“Where do you get these?” he asks Tony. “These are the best things I’ve ever tasted, and oatmeal is my favorite!”

“I, um, I made them?” Tony says. “I can forward you the recipe next time you stop by, if you’d like.”

“Nah, that’s okay,” Bucky says. “They’re always better when someone else makes them, in my opinion. If that’s okay.”

“Makes sense,” Tony says. “Have a good day!”

Bucky smiles to himself. (Tony Jarvis has a rather nice smile. It’s kind.)

Meanwhile, Tony is sagged up against the wall. Bucky Barnes is now close. He will come back because Tony cannot make himself be mean to someone like him.

But he can’t be caught. Not yet.

Not when he’s planning on a total take-down.

#lovelyirony writes #bucky barnes #tony stark #winteriron #i actually really love this #inspired by the writing styles of terry pratchett and neil gaiman honestly #listen: tony just wants 2 help people and hold babies #bucky just wants to live his life

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dredshirtroberts · 4 years

Text

Naming and Other Fun Things You Can Do With Your Trauma

Below will follow my journey to where I am today with my sexuality and romantic attraction levels and kind of be a look at where I might be with it all at this time. Because I want to figure shit out about myself for me, not because it actually matters right now, and I think taking a look at The Shit™ I’ve put myself through romantically will be a good jumping off point.

I might get TMI, as a warning, because I’m not good at keeping things to myself online. So be aware of that.

Alright so...how far back to I go? Do I start with the most recent endeavors or do I end with them? How do we accomplish this task.

Let’s start with actual romantical feelings I guess. I had a crush on the same guy for 7 years. There were other crushes during that time, one of which extended well past the end of my crush with the first guy. The 7 Year Crush was a guy I knew from church. He was a whole year older than me and he was Cool™. He had the cool guy haircut, everyone at school knew him, his parents were well known in the area, he played guitar. I liked him from age 7 to age 14 with no breaks. I finally got over him but it took a long time.

Now We’re Best Friends was fun. I acquired that crush around 10 or 11 or so - another church kid, again around a year older than me. They’re non-binary now, and one of my best friends. My crush on them was like...at least 10 years long. Again, there were some others that came and went during that time but I was a bit obsessed. They’re still really fuckin pretty but I’m at least aware they’re not actually my type and we would have been super incompatible so thanks to the universe for steering me away from that one.

The David Incident was...an attempt to get away from Now We’re Best Friends. I was 16 (going on 17, dahdah dee dahdeedaahhh). I knew him through some of the people we hung out with (ironically, NWBF was one of those people. I had a very small circle I interacted with - I’d say I was friends with them but they turned out to not be very good friends so, yeah...). We’d hung out at a couple of “parties” our mutualest friend held. I went to my sister’s dance recital for the dance school that same mutualest friend went to, so The David Incident was there watching her perform I guess. I never questioned why he was there I just knew he was. Why was he there? They weren’t that close.... huh.

Anyway, he complimented a necklace I’d gotten from my Nana that year for my birthday that I was wearing to the event (cause you dress up nice for your lil sister’s dance recital. Especially because the entire family shows up). We texted a bit and he asked me out on a date. We hung out pretty regularly for about 2 weeks. Mostly watching documentaries and making out, honestly. He tasted like doritos. It was kinda gross. He was also, I would later find out, a conservative neckbeard, so dodged a fucking bullet when he left me for his ex girlfriend he wasn’t over yet. They broke up again three months later and he’s married now to someone he met in college through the military program at the school.

I’m jumping over the Really Bad Choices I Made At Church Camp because he was technically too old for the event, I knew him for a total of 3 days, and he proposed to me after a week of text-only conversation. He also went into the military. This...actually this does become a theme. All my absolute worst decisions went into the military. Hmm.

Anyway where was I...

Okay so Really Bad Church Camp Choices, The David Incident...

And then I was on my own until I was in college. I’m going to count this next one as a contributing factor even though the entire relationship was completely platonic with no intention of going further (except..did I want it to? We’ll go into that I guess).

I Should Have Known Better is what I’ll call this one. This is the only relationship I had with a woman that will be listed on here because most of my relationships with women are friendship only. But this was...a lot more intense than just friendship. And I at one point wanted to be more than friends with her.

We met in class while I was in college. I had just come back from the deep south and was high on Megachurch Neo Baptist Doctrine and also whatever the people in the parking lot of the school were smoking during breaks between classes. It was probably weed. We struggled with the class because the class was shit and taught by someone who could not teach and would not recognize her own failings.

I Should Have Known Better was the first person since I’d started attending college courses to talk to me about things that weren’t class related. She invited me to hang out - she was 3 years older than me, lived on her own (with roommates, but it felt like she had the place to herself), she had a dog, and she did Grown Up Things like drinking and she sometimes smoked weed and my tiny freshly converted and c-sectioned out of the womb of attempting to be born again heart was all a pitterpatter at the thought that I was an adult and I could do that. She got me involved in online dating, we went to Disney together where I footed most of the bill (this is also where my financial struggles started up, though there was a nice long period where I was doing very well by my standards which are low but not bad). We decided to move in together because we were able to stand being around one another all the time and enjoyed it. We talked about becoming even adultier adults and moving into houses right next door to one another, where we’d have our husbands and we’d hang out all the time and it’d be great. There was one point shortly after our move where she had a pregnancy scare, and I was prepared to become the dad of that baby because the potential father was Not Good. Thankfully it was unfounded, but that’s how invested I was with her.

The place we moved into we shared with 2 other girls. These girls did not mesh well with I Should Have Known and this is where the name comes from. She didn’t handle the conflict well, none of us did, because none of us were over the age of 24. But I knew I Should Have Known and I knew it wasn’t her fault that all these other girls didn’t like her, they were just bitches who were immature because that’s what she told me they were. I never really knew the other side of the story.

Anyway we were 4 months into our lease and ISHK wanted the two of us to break the lease and move out. I couldn’t afford moving out and potentially owing 2 rents. The landlord wouldn’t let us out of the lease just because we (she) didn’t get along with the people we moved in with. They were all unwilling to try a subleasing agreement, and I had to make a decision as to whether or not I was going to owe rent at 2 separate places. Mind you, of the two of us I was the only one with a steady job and I was able to make rent and bills and feed 2 people. That was it, that was all I was able to do. I couldn’t afford her rent on top of mine - her dad was helping her.

And the thought that I could move in with her somewhere where it would just be the two of us and I might have to cover my rent (an unknown at this point), the rent at the place we were currently living, our food and bills, and potentially part of her rent if her dad wasn’t willing to help with 2 separate rents? I couldn’t do that. I consulted the cards, I freaked out and went to my family that she’d been slowly working on pitting me against for the past year or so of knowing her, went back to the cards, and spent the entirety of Thanksgiving break just in the worst state. I have always bitten my nails, especially when things get stressful. That was the first time I drew blood and it happened on more than one finger. It was bad.

I told her I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t leave the apartment. After the lease was up I’d be more than happy to change locations because it was only one year. She...didn’t like that. She told me that staying would ruin her mental health which was already bad, she told me that it would kill her to stay, that living with these two other girls was signing her death warrant.

That was the first time I didn’t just let someone talk me into something I didn’t want to do. Thinking about it is kind of giving me some really shitty reactions in my chest, but...but I did it. I told her I wasn’t going to leave. I sat through her reaction, I planned for her to tell me to never speak to her again, to give her back all the things she’d ever given me or lent me or anything. I sorted out my laundry so I could have her items separate. I was planning on losing my best friend because she couldn’t live with two other people.

The argument that caused all of this, by the way? Dirty dishes. I was the one who ended up cleaning them, as a side note.

ISHK ended up inducing vomiting in the shower after our major blow out about it, while I was sorting through the items she’d given me. I don’t know if it really was that she was crying so hard that she vomited or if she did it on purpose. She told me when she was done that she didn’t want to lose me as a friend, and that she’d stay with me because she couldn’t leave on her own, and also because it wasn’t fair that I be subjected to these two evil girls by myself. She had me clean the bathtub after her, and I did it. I was just glad she wasn’t angry at me and wasn’t leaving me.

Things were strained. She met a guy online, they hit it off over winter break. She’d gone to be with her parents during that time so it was literally just me and one of the other girls in the apartment for nearly a month. Learned some of the other side of the story on that one.

She comes back, she brings the guy with her to hang out. We smoke weed together, he seems alright. They plan on making brownies. You know, special brownies. In the communal kitchen.

She has me go to the one other girl - the one I spent time with during the winter break because it was just the two of us in the apartment - to make sure that it was okay. Even though no matter what the answer was, it was going to happen anyway. The other girl was not pleased, because our agreement was that she and I could smoke but we kept it to our wing of the apartment.

Thankfully this other girl did seem to recognize that I would not do something that directly went against what we’d all agreed on if the other party said no had ISHK not been there. The cops were called, only ISHK got in trouble (she could have lumped me in with her, but she was trying to keep her new boyfriend out of trouble. She didn’t have to, I guess). This did not help relations with the other roommates, of course. She was convinced it was the one who I’d stayed with over the holidays that had caused all the trouble - when not only was that kind of a projection, but also inaccurate because the person who hadn’t been doing their dishes in the first place was the 4th roommate who has been relatively unmentioned due to the fact that I barely spoke to her.

She moved in with her boyfriend when the lease was up, they eventually got married. She did a volunteer stint with a group who she later introduced me to. I feared losing her after the November Incident and let her use me like a doormat a lot more after that. Through the volunteer group I met my next mistake, but we’ll get there. She actually pushed me into trying to have a relationship with him, but I’ve now learned that I should probably not date people who identify as heavily armed and armored combat vehicles so at least there’s that.

I became so attached to this woman that I wanted to be in a more romantically inclined relationship with her and her husband. I never brought this up specifically but we were entirely too codependent on one another. She required me to build herself up and validate her worldview. I required her because I felt I had no one else.

Through the volunteer group I learned that that’s not how healthy friendships or relationships look for the most part. There were aspects that weren’t so bad, of course. I wouldn’t have been her friend for four years straight otherwise. But we were not healthy together. She may not have been abusive necessarily but she and I were toxic together.

And I should have known. At least that something was wrong earlier than I did. Because of her I moved away from my hometown. The intention was to be closer to her. Everything was finalized and then...I had to make a decision. It was her or the new group of friends who didn’t require me to be anything more than myself. I could explore my boundaries and enforce them in a safe and healthy environment and they would be respected. I had people who supported me and loved me and didn’t mind that I was a little strange because they were all a little strange and I loved them for it. Still do, by the way. <3

So my choices were someone who made me choose between being financially stable or potentially ruining everything I’d just set up four months out of my parents house and got mad at me when I made the right decision because it wasn’t what she wanted. Someone who tried to turn me against my family and very nearly succeeded - whether it’s what she intended or not that’s what she was doing. Someone who when I told her I shouldn’t have to choose because 1) it really wasn’t as big a deal as she was making it out to be and 2) I shouldn’t have known ANYTHING about the situation, specifically the things that were supposed to be confidential between her and the main person she had an issue with (who happened to have a very dominant personality - this was a theme), she told me she felt like killing herself.

And if she killed herself because of this it was my fault.

That’s what she told me. Thankfully for me I was at work an hour away and could not drop what I was doing and rush to her side. I would have, if my dad hadn’t stepped in and said “if she were really honestly going to do it, she wouldn’t tell you like that.” Which, yeah might be a shitty way of putting it, but also was true.

I chose not her. I didn’t necessarily choose the volunteer group because for me that’s not the choice I was making. I was choosing to be beside her for another however long it was, alone with no one but her, because she didn’t want me to have anyone else, until she decided she didn’t like the way things were going and pulled this shit again - or not any of that. Of being responsible for only me, emotionally, financially.

I was also beginning a relationship with The Warzone and I couldn’t separate him from her from the volunteer group.

Those next few months were rough for me. When she finally calmed down from everything, she tried to get back into my life. I requested she wait until I contact her again because I was still working through my thoughts and feelings and I didn’t need her influence in that process. I knew it would not be helpful. She would give me about a day, maybe two, before texting me again. This reset everything for me because I could not deal with her and with my still conflicted - and very hurt - feelings about the situation. And I asked her again to please respect my request. This happened several times and I finally stopped responding to her altogether.

There were only two terse emails after that, where she had me come collect my things from her house and leave my key while she was not there. The exchange happened quickly and quietly and I didn’t hear from her for several years after that.

I was with The Warzone for the summer. Considering my longest lasting romantic relationship to this point had been about 2 weeks, this was a novelty to me. I was convinced this was it, this was the time I’d done something right, after all my bad choices this was a good thing.

He had some troubles, and had things that had become roadblocks but he had a job, he had his own place, he had a direction he wanted to go in. So I’d just graduated college and he was still in college life? I was still roughly the same age as his friends, I could still hang and party. My life wasn’t that different.

Our major struggles were mainly that we lived about an hour apart, and we didn’t communicate very well. Or at all, really.

I was anxious and terrified. I hadn’t started working through all my shit yet. I didn’t even know there was shit to work through. I was grieving the loss of my best friend and I had no idea that was even happening. 2 best friends, actually. NWBF had moved really far away and I was still crushing on them super hard. I eventually told them I couldn’t be friends with them until I figured my shit out. That was hard.

I was going through a really rough patch and self medicating with alcohol and more weed because I apparently had found another pothead in Warzone.

Warzone was also my first partner I’d ever had sex with. I don’t regret Warzone necessarily, but I do regret that I invested so much in the relationship, to the point that I blatantly ignored several signs that this was not going the way I wanted it to. His own struggles led to him realizing he couldn’t be in a relationship with me. I still am fucked up over the phrasing he used, because no one wants to be described as a roller coaster the other person doesn’t want to ride on anymore.

And he did this before we were set to hang out with people through the volunteer group. I am incredibly, incredibly thankful for the people who allowed me to lean on them while I was there, who knew the situation. We kept our PDA in the group to a minimum anyway so if you didn’t know we were together, you wouldn’t know unless we told you. He showed up high about an hour after I’d gotten there. I’d showed up early because I’d had to leave after he broke up with me, and I had a nice long tantrum cry in my car in a small parking lot downtown and couldn’t be alone anymore.

My roommate at the time treated me to drinks, helped me get set up on a dating website after some wine on a different night, and was generally supportive throughout the process. I think her change in behavior towards me should have clued me in about The Ex a lot sooner, but oh well.

Because of the dating apps/sites I signed up on, I met The Ex. That whole debacle played out through my posts on here for the most part because this is where I process everything, so if you’ve been with me for a while you’re pretty familiar with my mental state while I was with him. I was constantly justifying his behaviors and actions and no one who loved me liked him but no one said anything either.

They all have carte blanche to tell me when they don’t like someone I’m dating from here on out - not that I plan on doing that much in the future, but I wanted them aware of it. After ISHK and The Ex, I need outside input to show me I’m not making good decisions with the people I’m choosing to keep in my life despite the fact that they treat me like dirt.

ISHK laid the groundwork for The Ex to fully isolate me from my family. Not only was I farther away from them than I’d ever been in my life, but he took me from the job that allowed me to see them regularly. He encouraged me to skip family events. I missed nearly 5 years of my family’s lives because of this man.

When I left him, I was already emotionally done with him. So I thought I’d be ready to try again. It may have been compensation for my loneliness, for my isolation, still so far away from my family even though they at least were aware I was struggling. I couldn’t let myself rely on them yet.

Still can’t.

So I turned back to the dating apps. And I met The Pittsburgh Mistake.

He was nice, charming. I’ll admit when I met him a gaydar went off - the one that says “Oh, this might be a trans guy”. You know all the signals we queer folk give off to one another to say “Hey other queer folk guess what I’m one of you please don’t let me be alone”? There were multiple that read as trans guy.

He was not. I wish he had been. But no he was a redpill, conservative nightmare. And he was abusive as FUCK. We went on an outing and he didn’t tell me the plan was to stay overnight somewhere. He just had me drive him around and we finally got up there and he was like okay let’s go get a room for the night.

That was the first sign.

Then he was like “Hey I gotta go back to Pittsburgh to get all my things so I can move down this way, wanna come with me?” Thinking it was going to be another overnight, maybe a 2 night stay maximum, I said sure.

We were there for almost a week. He’d driven so I couldn’t just leave. He didn’t seem to have any intention of actually doing anything to move his stuff, or sell it, or anything. He flirted with other women nearly the entire time - which I didn’t have an issue with him seeing other people, but I wasn’t, I don’t think, prepared for him to do it while I was with him. Like out with him. On things that other people might have considered dates. I’ve mentioned, however, that he took me to a huge museum and I nearly did forget that I had no idea how long we were going to be up there, I had no spare clothes - just one outfit, he would actively ignore me to flirt with other women, and he wasn’t doing anything to move the situation along with his move.

I’d picked back up on smoking while I was with him. I’ve smoked cigarettes a few times in my life. I can quit cold turkey pretty easily and that’s not an issue, it’s just...I shouldn’t do it. It’s bad for me for a number of reasons, not the least of which is that my mom’s family has a tendency to acquire rare lung cancer that’s exacerbated by smoking. The other is that I have a penchant for getting bronchitis, like, all the time. But I was smoking a lot more heavily than I had previous times, even when I was smoking a lot of weed daily with ISHK, I didn’t smoke nearly as much as I did with The Pittsburgh Mistake.

The other thing that was a huge major red flag I should have been more cognizant of is how he made it my fault if he couldn’t keep it up or get it in during sex. I was doing something wrong, I wasn’t good enough or prepped enough, even though he’d done literally nothing to help things along. It was be ready to go whenever he wanted it, or be told I was worthless and useless and I must not really like him if he couldn’t get it in.

He got really drunk and wouldn’t know what he was doing, and he got really uncomfortable to be around while he was drunk. He claimed he wasn’t an alcoholic but i know he was using it as a crutch for whatever was going on in his brain. He projected his issues onto everyone else. It was everyone else’s fault, not his. They were crazy, not him.

When he started talking about being godlike in a decidedly blasphemous way, I figured there was definitely something wrong. When he continually invited his other girlfriend over while I was still there, despite the fact that both of us had been vocal about it being uncomfortable for us, I knew I needed to get out.

When he broke a window right next to my head because I was trying to leave because he’d invited her over again without saying anything to either of us until he’d already made the decision, and he was drunk enough to not remember it even as it was happening, I knew I needed to run and never come back.

I gave him one last chance. I asked him if he knew why I was upset, and he said something bullshit I don’t even remember. I told him about himself and he accused me of gaslighting him. Which??? Telling you you’re an asshole and that I am uncomfortable when you bring your other girlfriend over and haven’t discussed it with me, especially since I’ve told you multiple times I’m incredibly uncomfortable in that situation is not gaslighting. But he thought he was a genius and so smart and so close after The Ex who had a god complex and thought he was a genius and so smart, I knew I needed out and fast.

He literally sent me a text with a screen shot of a bible verse saying “I am a jealous god” yadda yadda and something about I’ll end up dying alone if I continue being however I was being. Like, thanks, but no thanks I don’t even believe in the Christian God, I’m not going to believe you, some random redpill douche who literally broke a window because I wasn’t putting up with his bullshit anymore, is a god either. I’m very proud of my response.

“LOL, okay bye.”

Like, sorry, bro. You gotta feed me a way more intricate story than just that you think you’re god incarnate. The Ex at least told me he could travel through alternate dimensions and universes and pulled me through along with him at some point from another universe - not his, but a different one, because he loved me so much. You gotta try a lot harder on the god complex in order to top that one, buddy.

yeah I wish I was kidding about the above. I also wish I was kidding when I tell you I believed it.

I’m still working on not believing it. I don’t feel like i belong in this universe a lot of the time, and playing into that did not help. And it’s especially not helpful when I’m super depressed and feeling mildly suicidal. So that’s been fun to deal with since I’ve gotten away from him.

Anyway, those are my relationship mistakes. Warzone almost doesn’t count because it wasn’t necessarily a mistake, but I shouldn’t have been in a romantic relationship so soon after the ISHK incidents.

And through all of this, one of the weirdest things for me is realizing that when I was in relationships? I didn’t necessarily feel any draw to be any sort of way with people. Like, I was with The Ex for 4 1/2 years, and while I loved him I wasn’t romantically in love with him. Which I didn’t realize until I was on my way out of loving him at all because he was treating me poorly. I was physically attracted to The Pittsburgh Mistake, but I knew that wasn’t a long-term deal from the outset. But I wasn’t necessarily sexually attracted to him. I have a high sex drive that sometimes clouds my judgement and I know that was a part of it, but he wasn’t *sexy*. Neither was The Ex. I found him attractive, aesthetically, but he wasn’t *sexy* necessarily. I told him I found him sexy because he didn’t understand otherwise and I thought I was helping. I was actually making it worse but I didn’t know. I felt giddy around The David Incident because I was 16 and was excited that I was finally dating someone because I’d never really done it before. I was just downright stupid with the Bad Choices I Made At Church Camp and that one I will own, but again I was 16 and lonely. Now We’re Best Friends has been the only one that worked out and I think honestly it was the LGBT+ flocking instinct.

I Should Have Known was the only one I feel came closest to romantic feelings and honestly I think that was more stockholm-obsession than actually anything romantic.

So while I’m a sucker for a good love story, while I love the thought of being in a loving romantic relationship, I’m not sure I’m actually romantic? Like?

There was a post the other day that was like “I’m in love with being in love, but I’m Aro-spec" and I was like??? That’s a thing???

And then I was listening to someone else who said they were cupioromantic and I looked up what that meant because I don’t know the aro-labels as well as the asexual labels and I was like???? That’s a THING??????

So, I’m still figuring myself out. I thought I was nearly there and then I remembered I don’t make anything easy for myself. I’m somewhere on the ace spectrum. My sexual attraction is very limited to what I definitely have zero chance with and that’s because it’s safe. Also it’s very aesthetically based, not powered by my genitals or hormones. As to whether or not I’m Aro as well? We’re still working on that.

But this was apparently more about me processing my trauma more than figuring out my labels since that’s what happened. I’m still working on my labels. I may never figure it out. It might change and then I’ll be really fucked which’ll be fun.

So anyway...did you really read this far down? Holy fuck this is so long, well done. You deserve a cookie or a glass of water or at least stand up and stretch like goodness you must be exhausted. Thanks for supporting and loving me and for being here with me while I try to figure out what the fuck is going on in my life.

I love you.

#the captain rambles #this is incredibly long and very personal but I wouldn't post it if I didn't mind y'all reading it #It's mostly about the shit I've gone through over the years as relating to my personal relationships with those outside my family #and then at the very tail end is me pondering labels and what they mean to me #I just really like coming up with fun names to call the crazy shit that happens in my life #because it makes it seem less terrible than it sometimes was #because there've been some shitty things that i've gone through #but hopefully we're moving towards a better place now

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