Elemental of Energy

But also bonus:

Elemental of ✨G R E E N✨

IDK IF YOUR REQUESTS ARE OPEN, BUT I HAVE AN IDEA!! WHAT IF THERE WAS A READER THAT LIKE WAS IN THE CIRCUS?? LIKE THEY DONT HAVE TO BE A RUNAWAY BUT LIKE THEYRE IN A CIRCUS, AND LIKE LUKE GOES TO THE CIRCUS THAT THEY ARE IN AND LIKE IDK HES ON A QUEST OR SMTH AND IDK IDK. AND I DONT HAVE ALL RHE DETAILS BUT THEY COULD GO BACKSTAGE OR SMTH 🤭😏 AND THEN THERE COULD BE FLUFF AT THE END?? ILYYY

- 🪰 (a simple fly on the wall 😗)

LMAOOO! This was too cute, I love you too! You are my slutty little fly on the wall pookie! Ofcc I have a idea of what your trying to go with and I got you babes. Can be found in my masterlist as "Daredevils and One night stands"

You were an acrobat. You did cool tricks and were very flexible. You enjoyed working at the circus. It brought you peace and made your blood run hot in your veins.

Everybody called you a daredevil, sometimes even a clown with the stuff you did. You were a goofball and goofed around everyday. Playing with your life on that tightrope. But you didn't care.

Not one bit. It was exciting for you, not fearful. So when you had your next show tonight you decided to be extra dangerous. You decided you were going to walk on the tight rope with fire.

"Are you ready?" Your partner for the stunt asked. You gave him a big smile and nodded. "Hell yea I'm ready!" You say juggling both the unlit torches in your hand.

What you weren't expecting was that there was this fine ass boy in the stands that you could see from backstage. He had a scar on his eye, black curls, and the most beautiful smile you've ever seen.

His lips so full and pink, and god you wanted to suck on them all night. His jawline was immaculate and his facial features were just god like.

As if Zeus crafted him himself. You stared at him and soon he looked in your direction and made eye contact. You smiled and waved and he smirked and waved back.

'God what the hell were you doing'. You internally face palmed and rolled your eyes. You heard someone call your name. It was jake, your partner for the stunts.

"Ok so after the clowns go, we go up there and close out the show. You'll be balancing on my shoulders while I walk and you hold the fire. Your then going to flip the torches in the air, do a handstand on my shoulders and then I will catch the torches, got it?" He asks with a savage smirk on his face.

"I was born ready baby!" You laugh as you two do your signature handshake before preparing by getting dressed and getting your props ready.

After the show your met with everyone backstage, each and everyone of you congratulating each other on a great job.

You tie your curls up into a bun and make your way to your dressing room. On the way there your stopped by the same cute boy that was in the audience.

'How'd he get down here?' You thought. "Hey, I'm Luke and I just wanted to say your performance was bat shit crazy, but I liked it." He says with a charming smile.

You get to see his features up close and damn was he fine. Sexist boy you've ever seen. His scar looks so much better up close and his plump lips are so pink.

His smile is amazing with pearly whites radiating and shining under the dim light.

"Hi, uhm thank you! I am a bit of a daredevil so you know... Would you like to come in?" you ask with a polite smile on your face.

He nods and you look down at his lips with a smile. 'God I wonder how his lips would feel on my pu-' You shake your thoughts away before they get too far and open the door to your trailer.

He lets you go in first and then he goes in and closes the door. 'Wow hot and a gentleman!' You thought.

"Welcome to my humble abode. Hope you like it." You say with a laugh. He chuckles with you and sets himself down on the couch.

"I usually don't allow people in here, especially strangers but for you I've made an exception." You say walking to the mini fridge to grab a soda.

He gets up and comes up behind you. You don't feel his presence at first until you stand up back still faced him and you hear his voice.

"Glad you did. Wouldn't have gotten to meet the girl I've been feigning for all night." He whispers as he wraps a hand around your waist.

Your eyes go wide as you spin around noticing he's pinned you against the counter. You gulp and put the two soda's you pulled out on the countertop.

"I-Is that right... h-how lucky am I." You say nervously as his eyes rake over your body like a scanning machine. His eyes are darker than before and he looks intrigued yet intimidating. Your a lot shorter than him so he towers over you extremely.

"Wanna make you scream for some odd reason. Like I'm addicted to you and I need you. So why don't you be a good girl and bend over so I can beat that pretty pussy up hm?" He says lowly. His voice demanding and seductive.

You obey and bend over against the cold countertop and let Luke rip off all articles of clothing that belong to you.

You whimper out at the feeling of his fingers sending small light smacks to your ass. He rubs his fingers along your pussy lips and gathers all your wetness before trailing his fingers up to your clit.

He rubs his fingers in a figure 8 motion sending waves of pleasure through your body.

"Oh f-fuck Luke! Right there, that feels s-so good, mhmm!" You whimper out as your eyes roll to the back of your head.

"Ya gonna cum baby? hmm? Just off my fingers? How pathetic." He degrades. You whine as your thighs shake. He's knuckles deep and your begging for a release.

He pulls his fingers out and licks them clean before you can even feel the sweet sensation of your release. "Ohh Luke c'mon! Pleasee!" You whine out hearing him chuckle behind you.

"Oh come on princess, you don't even know me. You want this badly huh?" He says chuckling at how desperate you are.

"Well it's not my fault," you starts as you turn to face him pointing your finger in his chest. "You came in my trailer, touching on me and getting me riled up saying how you wanted to pound my pussy. So live up to what you said and fuck me!" You say in aroused frustration.

The need to cum getting to your head and making you dizzy. He smirks and bends you over. He runs his lengthy, girthy cock through your soaked folds and you whimper.

“Gosh just put it in alre- ahhh!” You cry out as Luke thrusts his cock inside your tight walls.

His thrusts hard and fast as he rams his big fat cock in you.

“yea? Hmm? Shut you up real quick! Like this dick in your walls baby?” He says with a smirk on his face.

you whine out moaning at the feeling. You claw at his bicep feeling the muscle flex under your fingertips.

“ahh gon gonna cum Lukey, I’m gonna cum so hard! Can I cum please?” You beg feeling your orgasm approaching faster than you thought.

He chuckles darkly behind you and before he can even answer your door flies open causing Luke to pause his abuse on your cunt as he looks at the door revealing your stunt partner standing there in awe.

Your eyes wide as you freeze as you’ve just been caught having sex in your trailer by your best friend…

Taglist:@elaratckker @lizziesfirstwife @angelicdanvers @prettyinsatiable @angelinajolie0213 @maryann2013 @kneehe-nehar7 @rhydianissuperior @urmomsbananabread @reader-bookling123 @istillremberthefirstfallofsnow @csifandom @repostingmyfavs @leo-lvr @glorywielder101 @aanoia @madelainelupin16 @ahh-chickens @callsignwidow @murdrdocs @bright-molina

A/N: part two???? Hope yall enjoyed! mwah💋

Grailfinders #328: Mysterious Ranmaru X

today on Grailfinders, we’re combining gudaguda and the servantverse into one dangerous Mysterious Ranmaru X-shaped cocktail. she’s an Echo Knight to sword while you sword, and an Aberrant Mind Sorcerer to get some cool servantverse tech and a sword to ride around on.

check out her build breakdown below the cut, or aer character sheet over here!

next up: how to marry your dragon

Race and Background

for once we can ignore the “yeah they’re technically magical copies now but they used to be human” thing we deal with with every other servant since MRX comes from the Servantverse, meaning she’s 100% not a human at all! they’re from space, and xe has PTSD from Nobu’s actual death, which would make her at least 450 years old, so calling him an Astral Elf isn’t too far off. you kind of live forever, but more importantly for gameplay you learn Dancing Lights which uses your Charisma, you have Darkvision, Fey Ancestry, which helps against being charmed, Perception proficiency, a bonus action teleport thanks to Starlight Step for sick swordboarding moves, and you can fall into an Astral Trance instead of sleeping. it’s like normal trance, but you get a proficiency for the day when you do it. all that, plus you get +2 Dexterity and +1 Charisma!

also, you’re a Far Traveler (space edition), giving you proficiency in Insight and Arcana.

Ability Scores

first, Charisma. advanced sci-fi tech is normally intelligence, but servantverse stuff is just based on what sounds cool at the moment. like literally, the whole universe has seasons and episodes, their tech might literally run on phlebotinum. second highest is Dexterity. balancing on a literal sword’s edge is hard, let alone one that can fly. also, I hate to bring this up every time, but you don’t wear armor. third is Constitution. you don’t seem particularly tough, but you’re good at saving against flashbangs, and that’s usually constitution. your Intelligence is a bit lower than I’d like. yeah, you’re goofy, but you’re “hyper-advanced sci-fi universe” goofy. this means your Strength is only average. B rank strength is great, but it’s hard to get leverage while you’re floating, y’know? that means we’re dumping Wisdom. not only are you a gudaguda, but you literally half-blind yourself at all times.

Class Levels

1. Fighter 1: starting off, you’re a fighter. you have the eye of a ranmaru! this means in addition to rising up straight to the top, you can use a Second Wind once a short rest to regain some HP as a bonus action. you also get a Fighting Style, and Blind Fighting lets you get away with wearing an eyepatch in a combat zone. now you’re always aware of any unseen creatures within 10’ of you unless they’re hiding. I assume this is also why you were able to lead Guda out of the flashbang with no issue, but maybe that’s why you have an eyepatch?

you also get proficiency in Strength and Constitution saves, as well as Acrobatics and Athletics. being a 16th century warlord is a pretty physical job! and so is being a ranmaru, I assume.

2. Fighter 2: second level fighters get an Action Surge, so now you can make two actions in a turn once a short rest. now you can sword while you sword!

3. Fighter 3: I thought a lot about how to make it so you can attack from multiple angles at once, and also how to make a flying sword, and eventually I decided to keep things simple and go Kuroko mode with the Echo Knight. you can send your longsword off to stab people when you Manifest Echo, but it can only take one point of damage before coming back to you. that being said, there’s no limit to how many times you can send it out, so it’s no big loss. while it’s out and about, you can  Unleash Incarnation Constitution Modifier times a day to attack an extra time as an attack action, as long as said attack is from the spot of your echo.

4. Fighter 4: fourth level fighters get their first Ability Score Improvement. Improve your Dexterity, and you’ll get hit less and do hit more! win/win!

5. Fighter 5: fifth level fighters get an Extra Attack every attack action, so now you can attack up to five times in a turn, using your action surge and unleash incarnation. that’s not quite the macross missile massacre you use in your NP, but it’s respectable!

6. Fighter 6: our last level of fighter is another ASI, this one to bump up your Charisma.

7. Sorcerer 1: you’ve got a floating sword, now you just need eye lasers, an NP, and the ability to ride it. and for that reason, we’re turning to spellcasting once again. as an Aberrant Mind Sorcerer, you get Spells you can cast with Charisma, but some of them are also Psionic Spells. these are bonus spells, and while we don’t use them too often, I’ll bring them up if they’re in-character. you can also replace the ones you don’t like with other divination or enchantment spells.

finally, you get some futuristic walkie-talkies via Telepathic Speech. mark someone nearby, and then you can speak to each other in your minds up to four miles away, and it lasts for a number of minutes equal to your sorcerer level, or if you hand a commlink to another person.

but, you still get spells normally, and those we can choose. grab Booming Blade and Sword Burst to space up your swordplay, Message for another walkie-talkie, Friends to be ranmaru-shaped, and Feather Fall because you’re already floating. finally, you get Ray of Sickness for your very first eyebeam! it’s not super strong, but it’s a start!

8. Sorcerer 2: second level sorcerers become a Font of Magic, giving you Sorcery Points that you can turn into spell slots and vice-versa. just know that you don’t get as many points from destroying slots as you need to make them, so right now this pretty much just gives you an extra slot to cast something like Magic Missile. while this fits the aesthetic of your NP, it’s not nearly the right power level yet, but again- it’s a start.

9. Sorcerer 3: third level sorcerers get Metamagic, two ways of spending sorcery points to add some flair to your spells. or remove it, in the case of Subtle Spells. with that, you can remove all external tells of magic- no verbal or somatic components, and you just need to have the materials on you to cast it. you can also use Extended Spells, doubling the duration of a spell for ease of use.

spells like Calm Emotions from your psionics to get in good with the ruling class, or Warp Sense. despite sounding like something that happens every gudaguda, this spell just lets you sense nearby portals. getting you out of the multiverse is a long-term goal, but finding a portal lying around would speed things up a lot!

10. Sorcerer 4: Fourth level sorcerers get their own ASI, and grabbing a feat like Telekinetic is cool. while you can’t attack easily this way, it does give you access to mage hand, so at least you can start lifting your sword yourself.

you can also cast Air Bubble now. it might be jumping the gun, but riding through space on a sword probably isn’t easy for people that need to. you know, breathe. now you don’t have to worry about that.

11. Sorcerer 5: fifth level sorcerers get Magical Guidance, letting you spend a sorcery point to get advantage on any skill check. but I’d rather spend points casting Melf’s Minute Meteors, which creates a bunch of swords that float around you, and every turn you can fire a few off to explode your enemies. still a bit slower than I’d want for your NP, but it’s getting there!

(also your psionic spell Sending is pretty good. it’s basically another walkie-talkie)

12. Sorcerer 6: sixth level aberrant mind sorcerers have Psionic Sorcery- now whenever you cast a psionic spell you can either cast it with a spell slot as normal or by spending sorcery points, with the latter removing all components for the spell as long as they aren’t consumed. you also have Psychic Defenses, giving you resistance to psychic damage and being frightened.

there’s not much else we want at level three, but we can still go back and grab a spell we missed. Alter Self is what makes a ranmaru a ranmaru, letting you change gender pretty much whenever you want.

13. Sorcerer 7: seventh level sorcerers get fourth level spells like Confusion! that one’s practically not even magic, it’s just the general effect gudaguda tends to have on people. if you hang on to nobu’s head you can also make mini nobus with Summon Aberration.

14. Sorcerer 8: eighth level sorcerers get another ASI, and this one makes you a Scion of Elemental Air. with this, you can cast Minor Illusion using your charisma for a hologram, but more importantly you can use the Wind’s Glide to fly for a turn. you’re a little shaky, but you’re finally riding your sword! you can use this ability proficiency times a day.

you also gain access to your penultimate eyebeam, Raulothim’s Psychic Lance! with this, you can target a creature you can see, or even one you can name within range- this forces an intelligence save, and if they fail they take psychic damage and become incapacitated for a round.

15. Sorcerer 9: ninth level sorcerers get fifth level spells, and for once we like everything we have- Rary’s Telepathic Bond is basically a group chat, and Telekinesis lets you lift up a sword with you on it. alternatively, you can use our chosen spell Freedom of the Winds to fly instead. with this you gain a flying speed of 60’, and you have advantage against being grappled, restrained, or paralyzed. you’re one of the few servants that can properly take on Tlaloc, and this is why.  also, you can end the spell early by using it to teleport out of the way of an attack.

16. Sorcerer 10: there’s one last thing we need for this build to be complete- a way to get to the regular world. to train up to that, grab Far Step for some teleportation for up to a minute. you can also cast Distant spells to double their range, though that doesn’t help here.

17. Sorcerer 11: okay, I lied- one more eyebeam. I mean can you blame me? Disintegrate is pretty cool! it deals a ton of damage if it hits, and can instakill anything knocked out by it in a way that makes resurrection pretty hard to do.

18. Sorcerer 12: with this last ASI, you can round up your Constitution for more HP and unleashed incarnations and your Charisma for stronger spells.

19. Sorcerer 13: finally, with seventh level spell slots in hand, you can Plane Shift to go join your master in the regular world. I mean, right now it’s just a cue ball, but it’ll be regular eventually. probably.

20. Sorcerer 14: there is one more way to ride a sword I wanted to grab- the spells and feats are cool, but they lack longevity. once you learn the Revelation in Flesh, you can fly to your heart’s content! by spending a sorcery point as a bonus action, you can fly and hover for ten minutes at a time. you can spend more points for more bonuses, but those aren’t in character. I’m pretty sure, at least. I don’t remember ranmaru becoming a slime monster at any point.

Pros and Cons

Pros:

being able to fly is always huge when it comes to avoiding damage, especially when you’re playing a character with ranged attack options. flight completely negates the threat of a lot of enemies, and seriously reduces the danger of many more.

you have access to all sorts of instant communication options that work over extreme distances- being in contact with whoever just ran off and split the party can be super helpful! and when they inevitably die it’s entertaining as well!

you also come packing a lot of way to ignore or resist common debuffs used to neutralize casters. silence doesn’t matter because you have subtle spell. paralysis doesn’t matter for the same reason, taking all your gear won’t stop you because you have psionic spells, etc. the point is, if you want to cast something, it’s not easy to stop you from doing it.

Cons:

all sorcerers burn through sorcery points fast, but you’re burning the candle at both ends- you’ve got metamagic, sure, but you’re also eating most of your points in one go every time you use psionic spells. while you can cast anything anywhere, it’s best to practice discretion.

you also use a Sword, which negates your flight since you’ll have to enter melee range to do most of your damage.

you use your bonus action both for a ton of spells and to summon your echo knight, which dies real damn fast. that means you’ll often have to choose between using the spell you spend a high level slot on or keeping your distraction alive, and having to choose between features isn’t that fun.

I've said before that I think chip would be big on contemporary, if anything. like me, he has a love of moves that look very cool, and unlike me, he does not have some unknown connective tissue disorder, and can pull it all off LMAO

on this note, his balance and instinctual spatial awareness are really good, thief training etc, and this lends itself really well to a ton of inversions, complex balances, even lifts. he's not as analytical as jay is about it; he's not super aware he possesses these qualities, he just Does and they help him figure out what needs to tuck and hold and brace to achieve the image he wants. despite this intuition, he's not actually strong enough to lift jay, who is like half a foot taller than him, or gillion, who is shorter than him, just built like a brick wall—but he is better than either of them at conceptualizing fun ideas for them to try out in pairs or all together.

he never got any classical or modern training, and so he's not into the technical aspect for its own sake whatsoever—he is invested in the space between what looks cool and what feels good. he has a huge respect for flow and improv for improv's sake, but he isn't so devoted to that feeling and flow that he completely casts aside looks and composition and appearances like I think edyn does. edyn, in my head, is—by now, at least—straight contact improv ideology, but that's a different beast for a different time. regardless, chip does not sacrifice appearances, and is always actively searching for what is most awesome. if hes working without a mirror he'll drag someone over to watch his current thought, give feedback, and scheme with him to bring out the full potential of whatever he's working on.

he won't shy from hip hop, but he's definitely more into acrobatics and floorwork than you could categorize as strictly hip hop. nothing about it is strict, really; he just wanted to dance, and so he did, and because he never quite got the guidance everyone else did, he ended up with a mashup of influences he picked up along the way. contemporary isn't truly its own dance style at all—it's often thrown in next to modern, but really it's a combination that draws on disciplines with full histories, like ballet and modern, and newer styles, like jazz and lyrical. it's just meant to push the boundaries of those genres and look really awesome. I think his style is, in the end, very heavy and grounded—it's also very conducive to chairography. chip could do soooo much with a folding chair. he could entertain himself for hours on that thing I think. he also can and will lean on his surroundings (railings, banisters, walls, windowsills, seating surfaces) just to see what happens—to push his poses, for compositional interest, or just to achieve a different, more dramatic feeling.

in the same vein chip also swings ollie around like he's nothing, since he's so much smaller, and ollie obviously lives for it, small boy developing vestibular sense or whatever. this inherently works towards ollie developing that same sense of balance and spatial awareness—so chip is unknowingly passing on to him a really important and useful skill that they are both unaware of, really. even without all this dance stuff I think that's something that chip has in canon that nobody thinks or talks about, despite how incredibly valuable I think it has proven to be to the crew.

took some time today to put together small base playlists I can listen to while I do these drawings for chip and a few other characters; chips is here if you're interested! I'm not interested in dance as a competition or a purely analytical practice so music influences my work, whether it's choreographing or drawing, more than really anything else. I don't have regular character playlists; thats not what this is—it's just an auditory representation of everything I've tried to outline here. I couldn't do one for chip and not gil, jay, and lizzie, so maybe those posts are also in the near future for me. crossing my fingers lmao they've been on my drawing to do list for ages

mid-may.

i've been having a pleasant string of almost-summer days that make me grateful. last saturday, amber and i went to cirque du soleil and had what seemed to be a life-changing and eye-opening experience - at least in the immediate aftermath, when we talked about leaving our boring, everyday lives to join the circus. (my toxic trait is believing that i can develop the capabilities necessary to be a cirque du soleil performance if i wanted to, even now, in my close to middle age) the human body is an absolute marvel. we saw mesmerizing contortionists, a man stacking chairs to an unbelievable height while also performing acrobatics, a man whose feet were strapped to one long stilt, who was launched into the air and did several flips before landing in perfect balance - it was insane and thrilling and now i truly believe every one should see one of these performances at least once in their life. after the circus, we went to my friend beth's 30th birthday party and it was cute. i'm trying to live more of an alcohol-free life, but it's difficult when i say i'll only drink on special occasions and every occasion seems special. got a bit tipsy, played with a dog, stood outside smoking a cigarette and talking about the upcoming movie, "killers of the flower moon." and when a friend of mine gets tipsy too, sometimes we get closer than we probably should. easy affection, a strange pull, some yearning for a deeper intimacy that might not be wholly appropriate given the context of everything. or maybe just a little bit of a harmless flirtation. the next day is sunday and i'm too hungover to go to church. i meet my sister at my parents' house later though, and we head to bang bang to stand in line for 20 minutes and get ice cream. we walked all the way there, which was impressive, but maybe a bit unnecessary. i'd invited conor out for ice cream, but he flipped it over on me and instead invited me over to a little party he and his friends were having at Tommy and Ronan's place. i wanted to go just to properly meet one of their friends, Shane, who had just immigrated to Toronto a couple of days before and has maybe the coolest natural hair colour i've ever seen. my sister and i get to their party, which is happening on the shared patio space on their building, so there's a bunch of random people there, and we find everyone talking to a group of australian girls. i play it cool with shane, pretending to be just noticing him, and strike up a nice conversation. he seems sweet, and a bit shy and sensitive, but also like he can have a good time. a nice addition to the group, in any case, but i guess they've all been friends forever. later we go to stackt market, and shane confides in me that he thinks it's overrated and he's bored, so i suggest going to crews. to my delight, he seems excited about the idea, but conor and i had been texting renee and she said she was at karaoke, so we went to meet her there instead. it might've been the wrong move since we ended up having to get a separate room anyway and barely seeing renee, and crews honestly probably would've been more fun, but it is what it is. shane leaves early saying he's tired. he leaves without letting most people know, and i feel bad he didn't have more fun, but there's always next time. the next day i meet my david, amber, and michael (+ michael's wife) at the beach. it's a nice day out and we walk along the board walk for a stretch before heading to a barbecue restaurant for lunch. my friend liam, his friend william and william's room mate meet us there. i feel kind of bad because i think liam thought we were going to have an actual beach day - a day of casual drinks on the shore, playing beach volleyball or some other sport - but really we just wanted to be outside in the nice weather and go get food. i think i accuse him of misunderstanding what i said when i invited him, but really i should've just apologized. in any case, he said he'd be ready for next time - that he would get some sort of ball himself and we'd all be able to play. he lives in the beaches but apparently rarely goes to the beach, but next time we'll make a day of it. our waitress at the restaurant is unnecessarily rude, making mistakes and accusing us of them and refusing to answer questions in any helpful way. it's honestly astounding, and i make a loud remark about how she needs to learn how to just do her fucking job that i hope she hears while she's walking downstairs. at one point she'd brought us what she says is a pork sandwich, which none of us ordered. she goes, "well, it's someone's, i wrote it down," and we say none of us ordered it so she goes back to the kitchen and comes back saying it's a brisket sandwich. our friend asks to confirm if it's pork or beef (since he can't eat pork), and she dismissively says something along the lines of, "i can't tell just by looking at it." so we ask her to go to the kitchen and check. and it was on her way back to the kitchen that i make a loud remark, and honestly after that she was quite a bit nicer to us so i think it worked. it's crazy how service can truly make or break a dining experience. we were 9 customers who were just trying to have a good time and enjoy the long weekend, and it seemed like this waitress with a stank ass attitude was making it her personal mission to ruin everything. to be honest, i think she was also a little bit racist or ignorant. maybe she was just a basic white blonde girl whose spent all her life in the beaches ever only with other white people, so she has no grasp of any possible experience beyond that. two of the people we were with were from cameroon and were asking her very reasonable questions that she was treating as stupid. i want her to try going to cameroon and ordering in french off of a menu that she doesn't understand. she literally had no patience or empathy, but i'm hoping she's just young and will grow out of that. after lunch, we walked along the beach some more and when we parted ways, i went home and took a nap until 9pm. all in all, it was a nice weekend with nice weather, and now i'm going to go back to trying to finally finish my portfolio.

liveblog containment post for aew rampage 5/27/22

i was out and about for lunch when it was live and then took a big nap

matt sydal vs bryan danielson! cool wrestlers alert dang matt sydal's gear looks good. nice outfit. its got a good balance of negative space. great design. note to self: insert pic later

see look! its good

ok that bit with danielson on his knees? yoooo

also? im glad sydal's hair isnt wet. im going to have to send an important update about this to my friend who is a lapsed wrestlefan man i never understand how sydal can do a standing backflip and then end up facing the way he faces at the end of it. acrobat heck yes!!! flip onto your feet!!! oh shit!!! the jumping roundhouse kick thing into getting caught into flipping danielson down?? heck yes me watching matt sydal and bryan danielson standing on top of the ring corner: gay sex is so complicated reverse powerbomb :O cool match but also rip

ooooo danhausen and hook recap promo

what the, what are the hardy boyz doing here LMFAO OH MY GOD? GANGREL??? OH MY GOD THE MATT FACTS? THE OVERLAY???? INCREDIBLE good shade being thrown omg??? not gangrel!!! he doesn't deserve this violence!!!!!!! yay the hardy boyz are here cutler the bump boy ok i really hope gangrel was talking to the hardy boyz like "oh i thought they were you. i got confused"

theyre adding MORE matches to the ppv? now we got darby vs kyle o'reilly on there??? theres a billion matches already!! oh i remember something about there being a big sports game going on on sunday and tony khan not wanting to start the main event until that ends... i guess itd be easier to choose to run that match or not run the match depending on how the schedule is looking than tell everyone to dynamically adjust their match durations

max caster vs dante martin! omg caster u cant say that about darius!!! rude!!!! nooooo that isnt your job aaaa boo the gunn boys LMAO they totally missed that shot-- whoever is in charge of switchin' cameras mustve been mid-sneeze or somethin glad they had the instant replay set up tho what a sick move by dante dude im always surprised at how big max caster is. every time what is it about him that makes his size deceiving... does he just not hold himself like a big guy? is his head too big proportionally to the rest of his body? does he just have short and stout legs unlike most tall guys who are, like, 75% leg??? what IS it he lost and my friend yelled in anger. sorry your boy cant win matches on tv. welcome to my world

samoa joe vs adam cole promo I Do Not Want Adam Cole To Win This least controversial opinion ever, probably. but still

DAN LAMBERT ALERT 😑😣 oh look scorpio sky got his lakers belt oh looks like they didnt forget about the second tnt belt ... yeah sure have disrespectful sloppy sex on all the championship belts. hate this i think kazarian being exasperated with them is funny but it can't make up for the rest of this

ruby vs statlander promo! look-- i dont think statlander, who was a sudden emergency replacement for the tournament, is going to win this. even though she should. she really should get something, because she rules. this promo almost convinces me that she could have a chance of winning this match though also?? ALL your friends betraying-- statlander the best friends never betrayed you. wh-- why. first youre not an alien and now this. if i didnt see chuck wearing his aloha walter shirt on tv i would think they were trying to retcon the best friends from television existence. im not going to turn into a catastrophizing wrestlefan but what about my favorite stable HUH? WHAT ABOUT THEM

THAT SCORPIO SKY TAG IS ON THE PPV TOO?????? ARE THERE THIRTEEN MATCHES ON THIS NOW OR WHAT

struggling to appreciate this ruby vs kris match because im still worked up about gimmicks where are the goofball women. where are they. where are the joshis why they are not around. jade is a mean buff strong lady, must we have two mean buff strong ladies and zero goofballs? bring back the joshis whoa-- are they really gonna make statlander win this? no they-- no they wouldn't design the tournament to be won by an emergency replacement ok there it is jesus the boos. like yeah i agree but still damn they should not have put statlander here in a bit part to lose, shes too popular. but like, i guess they kinda got caught between a rock and a hard place, because its like "oh we have an open spot here that we need to fill immediately-- who is available? who is good? who is popular?" and statlander checks all those boxes. but maybe they have other plans for her? like, if they want her to go and get jade's title or thunder rosa's title later, they would want to diversify their title allocation across different wrestlers right? so... patience? i dunno. i feel like kris statlander has such a bad run of luck because like, man. that velvet/hirsch/statlander feud never gettin an ending or resolution...

i’ve had Donatella Aquato on the brain lately, lads. 

a big issue i (and a lot of others) have with Donatella is how passive aggressive and guilt-trippy she is towards Raz. And how it’s just kind of... played off? which is fucked up 

so here are some hcs/concepts for some Donatella lore/character development for your consideration

(contains spoilers for the whole Psychonauts franchise)

aight so first things first: i want Hollis and Donatella to reconcile. I picture them going to the bowling alley and having some drinks and just kind of bickering the first time but as time goes on they just start vibing and going out for drinks more often (sometimes Milla will join too!)

they’re all friends your honor. its not a picture-perfect friendship; they don’t always agree and at times things can get a bit heated and they argue but they balance each other out. 

Hollis enjoys the occasional Aquato-brand whimsy and acknowledges Dona’s skill as an acrobat/athlete while Dona really admires Hollis’ more grounded demeanor and her leadership skills. she’s also grateful that this person who she sees as level-headed and a good leader is one of the people who’s looking out for Raz and helping him in areas (i.e. irt psychic stuff) that she herself cannot

i think a little while post-psychonauts 2 Hollis approaches Donatella with an offer of being a pseudo-instructor for physical education for the junior agents (and maybe the senior agents too-- the ones that aren’t too stuck up/prideful, that is) 

and Donatella’s like “well don’t expect me to give away any family secrets but i can help you stretch these children; i’ve done it like 5 times already i’m basically an expert”

P.E. instructor Donatella arc is basically what i’m getting at here like think of the potential for goofs. think of the junior agents thinking they’re hot shit only to get dunked on by a gaggle of gangly acrobats who’re like “god you can’t just do a backflip? it’s so easy what the hell”

as for how her treatment of Raz gets addressed:

it doesn’t happen immediately; it takes a lot of conversations with Hollis and Milla for her to start thinking “hm. maybe the things i’ve said to my 10 year old son about how he ‘betrayed’ us after he fuckin ran away bc he was unhappy and thought we’d hate him if he flat out told us he was psychic are not that great actually”

i think a pivotal moment would be Hollis opening up a little (and I mean a little itsy-bitsy teeny-weenie little bit) about her strained relationship with her family for Donatella to start to have that ‘oh no. what have i done’ moment that Augustus has during the first game

that line from the maternity ward in Hollis’ mind; the one from the parents that are like “when will (this baby) achieve our unfulfilled ambitions?” really sticks out to me. i think Hollis and Dona being able to relate to that in the sense that their parents wanted to live vicariously through their children and their children’s achievements would be real cool

i like to imagine that Donatella was a gymnast before she met Augustus. her mother was one of those moms that push their kids really hard in sports/pageants/etc so they can swoop in and share in the glory without really doing anything

so Dona had to put up with having that type of mom her whole life. her mother was very strict and controlling in all aspects of her life-- she wasn’t allowed to wear make-up, she couldn’t eat certain things-- it was uber fucked up and she hated it, but she also put up with it because it’s her mother 

until she gets injured and sidelined during training for a competition. Dona’s mom rips into her for getting hurt (which is awful bc she was more pissed that Dona couldn’t compete than she was concerned bc her daughter got injured) and they get into a massive fight that ends up with Dona leaving the house despite her injuries bc she’s just so pissed

the Aquato family circus also happened to be in town so heh... u know.... funny how these things work out huh

When Dona meets Augustus they don’t go from strangers to madly-in-love like instantly. in morrpeko’s house we don’t do ‘love-at-first-sight’ tropes; we need history. we need to fan the embers before they burst into flames my friends

so over the course of a season (spring-summer probably) they become friends. they bond over... gymnastics and acrobatics and stuff. everything’s going great until the Aquato’s are getting ready to leave

both Dona and Augustus are kind of devastated bc they were best friends by this point!! they don’t want to say goodbye, but they’re young and have no other choice.

so they part ways and it’s real sad

.......until next spring/summer when the circus comes back into town!!!

and they’re so happy to see each other again! they make up for lost time and hang out all the time! and Augustus is thrilled bc he thought she would’ve forgotten about him by now and Dona missed Augustus bc they were partners in crime, and she like the circus and all the performers there! everyone was nice and they just seemed to be good to each other like a big family and Dona’s like “god i wish that were me”

cut to the Aquatos leaving for the second time; Augustus and all the other performers and Nona promising to be back next spring/summer

and Dona finds herself wishing she could go with them, but she doesn’t. and she has to spend the next half a year tolerating her overbearing mother and her stupid rules and how she would take credit for everything her daughter did like she wasn’t even there.

those months alone made Donatella realize how unhappy she was. and her coming to the realization that she doesn’t want to keep being miserable and she might want to be an acrobat. so she makes the mistake of telling her mother

and her mother is livid. she shuts her down and guilt-trips and manipulates the shit out of her, and by this point Dona knows that her mother doesn’t care about her being happy, she just cares about what she achieves and flaunts her like a trophy

so she makes a decision. a  decision that frightens and excites her in equal measure, and she just gets more resolute as spring/summer approaches 

and the next time the Aquatos leave, she’s going with them, damn it! she’s taking charge of her own happiness. and even though it hurt back then, and it still hurts now, now that Dona is a lot older and has a family of her own, she doesn’t regret it

but when she realizes that Raz might’ve felt as awful as she did when she chose to leave? that he made the decision to run away because he was miserable and unhappy? that Dona might’ve unconsciously been saying the same kind of shit that her mother said to her? she’s devastated

she’s mad at herself and she just wants to undo all the awful things she’s ever said but she can’t. because you can’t change the past and you can’t just magically fix everything. so once she gets her shit together she starts pulling her kids aside and apologizing. promising to do better by them and vowing to not lie or hide things anymore

and that’s all i got cause this entire thing has been a big stream of consciousness 

thanks for reading 

What a circus GT

GT Prompt from a post I found

Warnings: Abuse, life threatening situations

“Get up girl!” a loud roar sounded out around Cadence, but she was a little more preoccupied with the flames threatening to lick off her eyebrows. The ring master cracked his whip and she flinched, all she had to do was walk the tightrope to the other side, simple right? Wrong.

No one had told her that below her would be fiery hell with an abusive ring master whipping her back if she froze in one place too long. She could feel the sting of the wounds on her back and the stiff already drying blood on her shirt thanks to the heat of the flames. She was currently crouched down on the wire where she had stayed since wobbling a little too much and almost loosing her balance, she had to move, or she would be cooked. That or whipped to death.

No one told her this is what the circus would be like, she had been living alone on the streets for as long as she could remember. 16 was not a particularly safe age to be alone on the streets, a friend had suggested she join the circus when it arrived in town, famously known for taking in misfits and outcasts. She had always been agile and flexible and thought there was some acrobatics that she could probably do. Little did she know it would be so much worse.

Carefully she stood back up on the wire and adjusted her feet to regain her sense of balance. Concentration and focus was key, however that was a little hard to find in her current situation, if only she could block out the heat and the pain then maybe she would be okay.

“Faster!” the ring master cracked his whip again and she felt her back slice open, fuck.

Her plan was to do a few tricks, perhaps a cartwheel on her journey across the wire to impress the ring master, but all she could focus on now was reaching the other side alive. Cadence kept her eyes on her feet carefully placing one foot in front of the other with her arms outstretched, just keep moving, she reminded herself.

She eventually reached the platform on the other side and collapsed in a heap, panting and sweating, red welts covered and blistered her skin. She was so relieved to have just survived the treacherous tight rope that she didn’t even notice the ring master standing over her, his puffy red face glaring down at her, furious.

“Worthless wench!” he shouted at her spraying spit on her face and showing off his uneven and blackened teeth. He grasps her forearm in a meaty fist yanking her to her feet, and irritating the blisters on her skin painfully. She let out a scream as her vision went blurry with pain and then the world was zipping past her, the whole tent like an orange, red and black blur as she fell to the ground, then everything went black.

When she woke she was being dragged along the dirt by her legs, she heard the clanking of metal and then she was lifted and thrown to the ground again in a heap. She raised her head enough to see the ring master glaring in at her through a barred metal door “you either succeed or die in the circus” he hissed “and you my dear, failed”. And with that the door of the cage slammed shut and locked, the ring master turned his back and laughed to himself as he walked away.

Darkness, cold and quiet surrounded her and she relished the relief that all those things brought her in this moment. She spread out like a star fish on the cool ground and tried to imagine it soothing her sores rather than causing a likely infection. The ring master had implied that she was either dead or dying but in this moment she was alive, still breathing, still surviving.

“Are you okay miss?” a voice rumbled around her, she couldn’t quite pinpoint where it was coming from, it seemed to come from above and surrounded her. Then she heard the clanking of heavy metals being shaken and dragged loudly, the sound ringing in her ears and the ground was now trembling.

She pushed herself up onto her hands and knees, staring at the dirt on the ground and watching the tiny pebbles and clumps of dirt bounce around. Slowly she stood and braced herself to turn around, ready to face whatever kind of beast the ring master had placed her in a cage with.

The first thing she saw was a wall of ripped up and dirty denim covering knees larger than she was tall, further up chains wrapped around a waist and torso bigger than life itself all the way to a dark face looming over her. His shoulder length dark auburn hair hung in greasy clumps about his sharp face, he seemed to be frowning at her with intense hazel eyes.

She had been dumped in a cage with a giant.

Without even enough energy to scream she found herself slowly backing further away from his looming presence until her back scraped against the metal bars, her back ignited with pain and she hissed.

“So this is what the ringmaster meant” she whispered to herself unable to take her eyes off the humungous beast in front of her, he meant for her to be eaten or crushed or worse, this gigantic being could do whatever he wanted to her and she was helpless to stop him.

“I’m sorry I didn’t hear what you said” the gigantic man asked, his voice thudded in her chest, or maybe that was her frantic heart. His face was twisted in confusion trying to listen for her much smaller voice.

Cadence just couldn’t bring herself to speak up, what was the point, engage in polite conversation before dinner time and then lights out.

Giants existed, just not on this side of the border, they stayed in their own territory, only unfortunate humans who wandered too close ever saw them and the lucky few who made it back alive, only lived to tell the horrifying tales.

The giant seemed to grow bored of waiting for a response from her and backed away, giving her some space she didn’t even realise she had been praying for. With a loud shifting of fabric and chains the giant sat back against the cage causing it to squeal under his weight and laid his legs out in front of him, sitting like that he spanned the whole length of the cage from the back all the way to where his feet pressed against the other side.

He stared up at the ceiling and sighed heavily, hands resting in his lap, he looked as relaxed as anyone could be while covered in chains that clearly dug into his skin leaving his wrists and sections of his torso bleeding. He had clearly been here a while, perhaps he was a side show the evil ringmaster made a profit out of, how they managed to find and capture a giant eluded her.

Cadence calmed slightly seeing the giant’s more relaxed rather than imposing form, she sat down as well but was careful enough not to rest her back on the cage. The giant man didn’t seem to be in any hurry to grab at her or pay her any attention at all at the moment so she decided it was a good opportunity to inspect the damage of her own wounds.

Two thick slices where the whip had caught her wrists on both arms were still oozing and warm, her bare arms bore burn blisters and every single open wound was coated in dirt stinging her continuously. She gently tried to brush away the dirt but let out a hiss as the sting amplified each time.

“Here” the giant’s voice rumbled startling her again, Cadence hadn’t heard him moving around but she had been preoccupied and trying to think of anything else but his immense presence. She looked up to see that he was holding out a bit of fabric that looked like it had come from the cuffs of his pants, it was dripping with water between his finger and thumb.

Slowly she reached out to take it from him, the cool wet material would be able to wash away the majority of the dirt from her injuries to prevent infection. She pressed the fabric to her hot skin and sighed audibly in relief that the cool water brought.

She met the giant’s hazel eyes as they stared at her, watching her every move, he seemed to be waiting for something “Thank you” she said genuinely.

He nodded his head once and sat back again taking a sip out of a large bowl filled with water that she hadn’t even noticed before now. The bowl itself was big enough to be a small pool to her, she could easily take a bath in it, and this man was using it as a cup.

Cadence cleaned away the dirt and grime from the wounds on her arms and soaked her leggings to cool the burns, it wouldn’t help in the long run though, what she needs was a nice cold shower to run over her burns but this at least provided temporary relief. Her next task was to tend to the wounds on her back. She glanced at the giant man sitting beside her, she needed to remove her shirt in order to clean the wounds and then they needed to dry out, but he was still watching her.

She reached around and attempted to tear the shirt, but her attempts were useless, she closed her eyes preparing herself to lift the shirt over her head when there was a sudden pressure on her shoulders. She opened her eyes to see a finger resting on each of her shoulders holding her firmly in place.

“Hold still” he said, the pressure increased, and the tearing of fabric could be heard and then she screamed. The wet cloth in her lap disappeared and suddenly a whole new kind of pain lit up her back as the fabric was rubbing on her wounds, she continued to scream. She thought perhaps he was cleaning her, maybe he didn’t like dirty food.

Cadence was reduced to quiet sobs by the time the giant had finished his work, complete with letting the water run down her back and then all pressure was removed and the pain in her back calmed as cool air touched it. Carefully she opened her eyes to see the giant man sitting back where he had been previously and threw the dirty cloth into a corner.

Cadence was clutching the now loose fabric of her shirt to her chest, she watched as the giant met her gaze and then quickly looked away, he sighed heavily causing a slight breeze to hit her.

“Th-thank you” Cadence stuttered, she had decided if he was going to eat her, he would have done so by now, not just clean her and leave her alone, maybe he was only trying to help. She had to hold on to some kind of hope in this hopeless situation.

He met her eyes and a small smile creased the corners of his lips “Your welcome”.

He looked her up and down, his large gold and green eyes scanning her body and then met her eyes once more “So what’s your name?” he asked her.

“C-cadence” she said carefully still feeling a little uncertain, but he hadn’t yet made any move to harm her, he’d only helped her so far.

“I’m Luke” such a normal name for such an extraordinary person, he extended a hand down towards her and she flinched, but his hand stopped a few inches form her face and only his forefinger was extended towards her.

Her shaky hands reached out towards his finger and grasped his fingertip, the large appendage then gently moved up and down once before she quickly released it. He smiled gently at her, dirt smeared his face, but he held a kind of rugged beauty, if he weren’t so large and scary, she might have thought him attractive.

“How’s your back feeling now Cadence?” he asked her, the volume of his voice had toned down a fair bit the more he spoke, though it still rumbled through her.

“Oh yes it’s feeling much better, thank you Luke, um hey?” she stopped herself short before asking the question, she wasn’t sure if it would be rude, and she didn’t want to anger a ginormous being that she was confined in a cage with and no escape. She shook her head instead.

“Yeah?” he asked awaiting her question, she had hoped he would just ignore it.

Fidgeting with her fingers she took a deep breath “How um how did you get here? I just mean it doesn’t exactly look like you’re here voluntarily, I’m sorry, you don’t have to answer, I’ll shut up, Sorry” she rambled into her lap not looking up at him and hoping she hadn’t angered him.

“It’s okay” he said softly “Just so you know, I don’t plan on hurting you if that’s what you’re thinking, I may have some anger towards a certain few of your particular race but you’re not the reason I’m stuck in this god forsaken place” she looked up at Luke now, he seemed more human now, his tone was so, normal and he looked so genuine.

“Anyway” he said “I was taking a walk along the border one day, Christ, months ago now, came across a human man who told me that a circus was close by, he said it was open to both humans and giants, the first of its kind, very revolutionary. So, I followed him, he offered me a drink and the next thing I knew I was waking up in a cage chained to the floor. The fucker had drugged me and tricked me, if I ever get out of here the first person to be flattened will be him” he snarled. Cadence gasped at the gruesome image of him crushing a human under his feet.

“Sorry” he mumbled, she shook her head decidedly, Luke would be her ally in this whole mess “It’s okay” she said, “and perfectly justifiable, but can I get a few punches in first?” she smirked at him, and he laughed, a wonderfully musical and deep sound that she wanted to hear again.

“Sure, I’d love to see that” his laughter died down, but his smile remained as he looked down at her “Okay so if we ever get out of here, you knock his lights out and I get to make a pancake out of him, sounds like a good plan to me, deal?” he winked at her and smiled.

All good things must come to an end though.

“Oh I see your making friends Beast” the poisonous voice of the ringmaster sounded out from the entrance of the cave. Beside him was a giant-sized bowl of what looked like scraps and mostly garbage.

“Didn’t your mother ever tell you not to play with your food?” he teased, his crooked smile leered in at them both.

“Unlike you I treat people with dignity and respect, I don’t harm others and I certainly don’t eat them, sir” the volume in Luke’s voice had raised again and he spat the word ‘sir’ at the ringmaster in distaste.

The ring master laughed loudly “You’ll do what I say, Beast, she’s of no use to me, I need you to dispose of her” Cadence held her breath.

“And if I refuse?” Luke asked, his face was stony and his eyes glared daggers at the horrible excuse of a man.

“Oh, you’ll eat her, you’ll have no choice” just like that he snapped his fingers and the guards wheeled away the giant bowl out of sight. Cadence began to shake; would Luke really eat her if he was hungry enough? The ring master was already walking away.

A smaller bowl and slid through the bars presumably for her, a cold bowl of porridge was what it looked like, but it smelled like something out of a toilet. She held the bowl in her lap looking at it with disinterest, he heart thumping in her chest.

Luke sighed audibly and sat back harshly on the bars of the cage, he looked down at her with a frown creasing his eyebrows. He looked at the bowl in her hands “You should eat” he said simply. Cadence shook her head and held the bowl up towards him “No you should have it” she said mostly out of fear that if he really did get hungry enough, he just might eat her despite what he says.

His frown turned to a soft smile, and he shook his head “Thank you, but there’s not nearly enough there to even make a difference” just then a loud rumbling came from his stomach, he crossed his arms over his belly in a weak attempt to conceal the sound.

“This isn’t the first and probably won’t be the last time I’ve gone a few days without food” he reasoned, Cadence couldn’t take her eyes off his stomach, Luke leaned down and used a finger to gently lift her chin up so that their eyes met.

“Look at me Cadence, I promise I will not harm you”

i don’t wanna fight alone anymore - chapter 3

let’s go-

read on ao3

-

"So what you're telling me is-" MK started, crossing his arms. "-the first thing we need to get on our journey is down there?"

As he said this, he pointed down at the, fairly large, river the ship had landed beside.

"Yep, that's right!" Wukong said, "It's supposedly guarded by some kind of river demon, or something similar. Not sure really, the details weren't exactly clear on that."

"Alright, well then let's go-" MK started, moving to jump off the ship and into the water-

Wukong stopped him, wrapping his tail around MK's waist and pulling him back onto the ship. MK stumbled a little at the sudden change in direction, grabbing onto the golden sleeves of Wukong's loose-fitting shirt for balance. The Monkey King easily steadied him, although the purple scarf he was wearing around his neck slipped a little in the process.

(MK had, the night after they left the mansion, found Wukong sitting in the common area, carefully fixing the tear in the fabric. It wasn't the best fix, the golden thread he'd used made it obvious that it had needed to be repaired in the first place, but it was fixed. Wukong started wearing it the next day.

MK, rather wisely, didn't comment on it.)

"Hold on there, bud." Wukong said, letting go of MK once he was steady. "You can't just jump in there all gung-ho. You're perfectly mortal right now, remember? You'd drown if you tried to go down there."

"Oh....right." MK said, nervously rubbing the back of his neck. "Sorry, I forgot. But if I'm not going then-"

"We'll send Sandy, Mei, and Pigsy down!" Wukong said, causing the aforementioned people to look up at him in surprise.

"Yes! Water Adventure time!" Sandy and Mei cheered, before running off into the ship- presumably to get the material's they'd need. Pigsy, on the other hand, looked at Wukong with irritation.

"And why do we have to go down, huh?" He asked, "Why not just go down there yourself?"

"Uhhh...." Wukong paused for a moment, trying to think of an answer that would be deemed reasonable.

"What? Don't want to get your fur wet?" Pigsy asked, though there was a slight teasing tone to his voice now. Off to the side, from where he was reclining in a chair, a pair of sunglasses and a cool drink in hand, Tang sighed.

"Come on, Pigsy." He said, sitting up. "Everyone knows that the Monkey King is useless at fighting underwater."

"What?!" Pigsy turned to look at Wukong, who very pointedly looked away from everyone else's gaze, nervously rubbing his arm. "What do we do if there's something down there that we have to fight then?"

"Just lure them up to the surface and I'll punch them?" Wukong suggested, and MK snorted in response.

"Literally when did that strategy ever work for you?" He asked, and Wukong lightly punched him in the arm.

"Shut up." He hissed, before clearing his throat awkwardly. "Anyways. Yeah I'm...not the best underwater. I'm sure you three will do just fine though!"

"You say that but-" Pigsy started, only to be interrupted as Sandy and Mei reemerged from inside the ship, carrying various objects they'd presumably need. Sandy picked Pigsy up with one arm, before jumping off the side of the ship.

"Have fun!" Wukong yelled, he and MK waving down at them. Pigsy glared in response.

"When I get back, you better be ready for some underwater training!" He yelled.

"Hear that MK? Pigsy's going to help you learn how to fight underwater." Wukong said. MK smirked.

"You know, for some reason, I don't think he was talking about me."

-

"So....What are we looking for, exactly?" Mei asked, as she, Pigsy and Sandy floated at the bottom of the river.

"You couldn't think to ask that before we dove under?" Pigsy said, before sighing. "I don't know. Monkey King said something about looking around for a weapon of some sort, honestly would it have hurt him to be a little more specific-"

"I found it."

Mei and Pigsy looked over in shock, to see Sandy holding, what seemed to be, a rather ordinary rake.

"...That's what we came down here to get?" Pigsy asked, "It just looks like a regular old rake to me."

"Trust me." Sandy said, placing the rake into Pigsy's hands, "It's what we're looking for."

"....Well this was underwhelming." Mei said, leaning back, letting herself float on her back. "Didn't Monkey King say there was meant to be guards? I was expecting a bit more of a fight."

"Don't say that." Pigsy said, tightening his grip on the rake, looking around them nervously. "You'll jinx it. I'd rather avoid having to fight some giant monster. That's the monkey's job."

"Well we can't just let him do all the work." Sandy said, "Monkey King deserves to be able to relax too, y'know?"

Pigsy was kept from arguing that statement, as suddenly the riverbed shook, vibrations slicing through the water, knocking the three of them unsteady.

"Thieves!" A voice yelled, and the three of them turned to see a river demon approaching them. "You will not leave this river alive-"

The demon froze as he took them in, and Mei smirked, fully ready and prepared to fight a battle.

"...Wait." The demon said, looking them over, before glancing up at where the ship easily floated on the water. "Are you....with the Monkey King?"

"Yes, we are." Pigsy said, and the demon looked between him, the rake, then back up to the ship.

"....Yeah, it's not worth it." They said, and then vanished in a flurry of bubbles. Mei slumped, disappointed that she didn't get to fight, while Sandy patted her back comfortingly. Pigsy, however, slumped in relief.

"Well, at least that's one thing we won't have to deal with." Pigsy sighed, before looking back up to the ship. "On the other hand though.... we still might be hanging around this river a while longer."

-

"Oh, are you back already? That was fast." Wukong said, leaning casually against the rail, looking down at where Pigsy, Mei, and Sandy floated in the water. "I hope you didn't run into any trouble down there."

"Demon ran away as soon as they realized we were with you." Mei grumbled, "It was disappointing. I was looking forwards to a fight."

"Aw, don't worry, I'm sure you'll get to fight something eventually." Wukong said, laughing. "Anyways, why don't you take MK down there to spar?"

MK didn't even wait for Mei to give a positive answer, grabbing hold of the stick he'd been using as a temporary staff, and jumping over the railing, splashing into the water. Mei laughed, and she and Sandy disappeared back under the water, bringing MK down with them.

Pigsy stayed, floating, staring up at Wukong.

"....What?" Wukong asked, "Do you need help getting out, I can help if you need-"

As he started saying this, he leaned further over the railing, his purple scarf trailing over the side. Seeing the opportunity he'd been waiting for, Pigsy stuck the rake out of the water, latched onto the fabric, and pulled, tugging Wukong over the railing with a yelp, and the monkey went splashing into the water.

Pigsy bit back a chuckle as he swam down to the riverbed, where Wukong now sat, arms crossed, pouting.

"I told you I'd teach you how to fight underwater." Pigsy said.

"I thought you were joking!" Wukong said, before sighing, running a hand over his face. "Seriously though, you're not gonna be much help. It's just a fact of life, the Monkey King can't fight underwater."

"We'll see about that." Pigsy said, and Wukong huffed, not even bothering to stand up. "Tell me, why is it that you can't fight underwater?"

"Dunno. Just can't." Wukong said, "Trust me, I've tried. Always lost."

"I can't teach you if we don't know what you're doing wrong first." Pigsy said, "C'mon, attack me."

At that, Wukong stood up, a wicked smirk taking over his face.

"You sure? I am, after all, the Monkey King-"

"Enough bragging, just do it."

Wukong lunged forwards, aiming for a punch- but Pigsy easily sidestepped, using the rake to hit Wukong on the back. Wukong stumbled, struggling for a moment to regain his footing on the sand floor. Pigsy moved to hit Wukong in the chest, and Wukong tried to pull back, going for a backflip-

Only to struggle mid flip, falling out of it and kinda wobbling as he tried to right himself, before landing back on the riverbed, his feet slipping out from underneath of him as the ground shifted, and he fell back down on his back.

"...Okay, I see the problem." Pigsy said, casually leaning on the rake as he looked down at Wukong. The way he was positioned almost reminded Wukong of-

No. He wasn't going to think about that. Not know.

"Do enlighten me, great Pigsy, as to what is the problem." Wukong said, groaning a little as he sat up, trying to brush the sand out of his fur.

"Simple, really, you're used to fighting with speed. Air and water are different, Wukong." Pigsy explained, and Wukong rolled his eyes. 

"Yes I know that-"

"You didn't let me finish. When fighting, you rely on speed, acrobatics, and force. Basically, to make a long explanation short, you're trying to move like you're in the air, but water is more dense, and thus requires you to move differently. The force of the water is making you move slower, and throwing you off balance." Pigsy said, holding out his hand to help Wukong stand up. "Listen, fighting underwater is less about speed itself, and more so about timing."

".....Huh?" Wukong clearly wasn't getting it, from the confused look he was giving him. Pigsy rubbed the bridge of his nose. Gods, this was going to be a lot harder than he thought it was going to be.

"You move slower in water. Thus, in a fight, you need to be able to predict where your enemy is going to go, as well as figure out where you have to go. Not only that, but you need to be sure you move at the right time to be in the spot you need to be in. You can't just make split-second decisions based on impulse when underwater, you have to think in advance." Despite Pigsy's attempt to clarify the explanation, Wukong just looked more and more confused.

"....Yeah, I think I'm going to fail this class." Wukong said, and Pigsy face palmed.

-

A few hours later, the whole gang was back on the deck of the ship, eating some noodles Pigsy had prepared for them. Of course, Wukong, not being one for cooked food, sat slightly off to the side, eating some peaches.

"You know, I've been wondering." Mei asked, looking at him, "Are peaches like. The only thing that you eat?"

"...No." Wukong said, sounding very unconvincing. "I eat...other things."

"Come to think of it, I think I've only seen you eat things that are peach flavored." MK said, "Well. That and your own hair."

There was a few noises of disgust from the others upon that revelation, although Wukong just shrugged, clearly unbothered by it.

"I eat what I eat." He said, going to take another bite of his peach-

And then something knocked into him, sending the bowl of fruit flying as he was knocked back. The others ducked, shielding their heads, not sure what had just come at them. Wukong grunted as his back hit the deck, his eyes closing instinctively, although they flew open again once he realized someone's hands were on his shoulders.

Despite the injuries covering the other person, he knew immediately who it was.

"Macaque." He hissed, and Macaque smirked.

"Ha. I finally found you."

Prompt 81 (Illumi x Reader):  “Your lips make me wonder what the rest of you would taste like.”

A/N: Sorry this took a thousand and 1 years but this is for you, anon!

---

Light-footed and nimble, you darted through dark hallways and deftly slipped past sharp corners, avoiding the streaks of moonlight threatening to reveal your presence. A literal thief in the night, you concentrated on your In as you kept moving, ensuring that you would escape the estate you had just raided undetected.

You thought you would be successful until your ears perked up to the single, unmistakable thud of a body hitting the floor. Your breath caught in your throat but you remained silent still, taking cover behind another wall before peering down the hallway to your right. 

There was only one person who lived in this house; you knew this very well having done your research meticulously: an old man, impossibly rich, but harmless. No friends, no family, just alone in a remote location hidden in the country. You had planned to take what you needed and leave him unharmed. He would have been fine, after all, as long as he had his life. 

Before your brain could do acrobatics to try to work out what could have happened, you heard his voice echo slightly, but unmistakably it was directed at you, loud and clear over the deafening silence.

“You’re here again.”

Something heavy fell into the pit of your stomach and something else, thick and suffocating like fear now filled your throat, but you knew you were already discovered. So instead, you steeled yourself, and stood in full view, staring - or rather glaring - across the dark hallway with your night-adjusted eyes right at the Zoldyck assassin, Illumi Zoldyck.

Flat voiced and expressionless, his eyes shifted from the target’s already stiff corpse and onto you, now frozen in place unlike the man you had just robbed. You could only just barely sense the irritation in his voice but you could not mistake for a second the very slight narrow of his large, dark eyes as he focused on you.

“Yes. So what if I am, you asshole?” You spat back. Now that you could see him in full view, you could feel irritation rise up in you. Of all the people you could keep running into over and over again, why did it have to be him? The way he spoke as though you were interrupting a very important job of his with your simple existence, every single time, was starting to become infuriating. Your work was just as important as his, and you at least could pride yourself on the fact that you weren’t really hurting anyone with what you did.

Material was just that… material. 

Illumi’s lips pulled back into a cruel mockery of a smile at your outburst, and somehow this compelled you to keep talking.

“That man couldn’t have possibly have been one of your targets, he’s-”

“You’re disturbing my work,” Illumi cut you off, straightening to his full height as he turned his attention fully towards you. You reflexively readied your hand over the dagger sheathed in the satchel affixed around your waist, but alas, he was too fast for you, seeming to disappear into the shadows before reappearing right where you stood. You jumped back, but his hand shot out blindingly quick to grip your jaw and pull your face towards him so that the few, sparse inches between you betrayed his blatant disregard for your personal space.

“Must I now regret sparing you all this time?” You could feel his cool breath on your nose and lips as he said this, and the physical closeness was enough to make you squirm. 

Sparing you? Your fists clenched so tight, you thought your hands would go numb. His way of speaking was always so patronizing - there was nothing you wanted more than to punch his pretty face in. 

And you tried just that, but Illumi drew back from you gracefully as though he had read you before you had read yourself. A disembodied chuckle filled the air as your swing missed, and you skid a couple of steps across the hard floor, but the moment you caught your balance to pivot and attack again, you found yourself being thrown back into the wall by the force of a wheel kick.

“Familiarity breeds contempt,” he said from afar, as you reeled from the impact, now slumped to the ground.

“Murderer!”

“Thief,” he replied just as quickly but calmly, walking back towards you again leisurely as you scrambled to a sitting position and tried to keep a defiant look on your face. You wouldn’t let him intimidate you. If he hadn’t killed you the first time you’d met, what made you think that he’d do it now?

Again, he smiled at your continued defiance.

He sat on his haunches before you, keeping his eyes almost level with yours. You felt helpless like a child, even more so when you found your body suddenly refusing to respond, to move a single muscle. You were like a trapped mouse, paralyzed in fear.

He pulled a yellow-capped needle seeming out of nowhere, and seemed to twirl it into his hand. All you could stare at was the gleaming point, you knew it was his weapon of choice.

“What to do? You’re always in the way,” he mused aloud, tapping his chin, his eyes still expressionless. Now he looked like he was examining you.

“Should I kill you?” With this, the twirl of his needle stopped, and he held it between two fingers at a standstill. 

“Back off,” you meant it to come out as a yell but instead of it came out in a soft whimper. As if he didn’t hear you, he continued his monologue.

“Or…”

And with that, he gripped you by the throat again and you could feel his cold, slender fingers around your throat tighten, but instead of him applying just enough pressure to make the air escape your lungs, he instead leaned in, and pressed his cold lips against yours into a deep, breathtaking kiss.

Your eyes grew wide with shock and your heart beat faster in your chest, but it wasn’t repulsion that drove you - it was a growing lust that began to rise inside of you and your eyes closed as he bit your lip painfully enough to draw blood before finally parting from you.

Your eyes fluttered open to see him look quite satisfied with himself, and you could feel the salty, coppery taste of your own blood on your tongue. 

Before you could catch your breath, he leaned back against you just so he could whisper into your ear:

“Your lips make me wonder what the rest of you would taste like.”

Godzilla vs Kong: Brutally Honest Thoughts

(Took me long enough, eh? Depending on home video releases be like that.)

So first things first, I have a confession to make: I spoiled the movie before I watched it. I was impatient and they had only announced an HBO Max premiere in the states and a theatrical run in Canada at the time. Afterward, I got heads-up from a friend and immersed myself in the opinions of those lucky enough to see it early. I’m just saying that I have some preconceived opinions that I’m sticking to.

That said, Godzilla vs Kong turned out to be more fun than I expected! But you already knew that. Everyone did. The two kings of movie monsters had their rematch and this time it was with glorious Hollywood SFX powering it this time.

The human story was fun but it’s clear they stopped trying at this point. Team Kong stole my heart, especially Jia. Team Godzilla (although the Conspiracy Crew would be a more fitting term since they spend more time chasing down mysteries than trying to back or understand Godzilla) was more fun than I expected and their dynamic was surprisingly enjoyable. Bernie is actually kind of funny, it's nice to see Madison acting more assertive, and Josh was fine--he was the only sane man of the bunch but he was also the butt of the jokes. Still, all the hardcore conspiracy jokes got old fast and it feels off seeing the daughter of two scientists turn into an edgy conspiracy crackpot. Why not an edgy science major?

Team Apex are fun villains, especially Walter Simmons who's a great megalomaniacal CEO type, but Ren Serizawa is a joke. I like his actor's performance but he's just another footnote. Nobody bats an eye at his last name, although the only heroes he interacts with are Nathan Lind and he just misses Team Godzilla. He really could have just been any other villain, but instead, they had to sully Serizawa’s legacy further while robbing a good actor of some interesting material. (As is, it turns out he was just an egotistical jerk with daddy issues--an easy puzzle to solve on day one--after all...)

However, I still cannot and will not approve of the fact that somebody thought it would be a good idea to make the heroes of a sci-fi story into hardcore conspiracy theorists in this day and age. Likewise, I’m not a huge fan of how they essentially made the Hollow Earth into its own universe complete with a crazy portal and an environment with its own laws of physics, nor am I totally crazy about the huge leap in technology that was made between this and KOTM, or G’14 for that matter.

The monsters as awesome as they are, are the biggest mixed bag in the show.

Kong is at his best in ages, and while I am all for the new heroic warrior character that Legendary have crafted and I acknowledge that making him a worthy opponent for their god-tier Godzilla was going to be a hurdle, I think they did a splendid job. Seeing Kong using agility and acrobatics was a glorious sight to behold, and something about Kong becoming a tool-user and weapon wielder just feels right. It’s a far better demonstration of Kong as a “thinking animal” (*wink, wink*).

I’m much less thrilled about their treatment of his greatest opponent ever. After everything they’ve done to build up Godzilla as the incredible force of neutral good fighting to maintain balance and all the build up to ancient rivalry debating back to a great Titan war--even going as far as putting his name in front Kong’s this time!-- they’ve reduced Godzilla back to glorified bully for Kong. He only gets the minimum amount of sympathy from the cast of his movie before they go off to deal with the conspiracy plot or focus on Kong and the Hollow Earth. Worse still, he is somehow more powerful and more aggressive than ever for a good chunk of the movie which leads to an outcome I’m sorry to say we all saw coming. Somehow, I suspect that the reason behind this was how Wingard cited Godzilla vs. Mothra, vs. Destoryah, and Shin-Godzilla as influences for the monsters scale and story, which while cool and all, are all movies where he was played up as a mostly stoic antagonist rather than a three-dimensional character like Kong. (Though ironically vs. Destoroyah and Shin did a better job of making Godzilla feel more sympathetic and in both of them he was a walking nuclear reactor meltdown.)

Due to the unfortunate time constraints of the three-way deal between Toho, WB, and Universal at the time this was in production, Kong was unable to secure a proper sequel that could develop his skillset like Godzilla’s did. Nevermind the fact the filmmakers completely surrendered to the “nothing matters but the monsters” mentality that a chunk of the fanbase has been spouting since this universe unofficially kicked off almost 10 years ago. (Sidenote: Oh god, I’m turning in an old fart already.) As a result, the movie trips over itself trying to set up Godzilla and Kong’s rivalry as well as building up Kong as a worthy opponent to Godzilla while expanding on their shared lore, and as a result countless plot points set up in in the previous movie and tie-in movie are thrown out the window. I’m sorry to say but in spite of all hopes and illusions of grandeur, it’s safe to this damn thing is a Kong movie with Godzilla as the bad guy.

...at least until HE shows up. Yup, Mechagodzilla. The biggest spoiled twist of the centuries steals the show so the movie can pull a Dawn of Justice. But! It does it much better than the fractured DCEU’s most controversial entry ever could. Mechagodzilla’s inclusion gets a decent amount of build up thanks to Team Godzilla/the Conspiracy Crew, and when he shows up, does he make an impression! At first, I wasn’t sure how to feel about his inclusion or his design, but I’ve come to like this one. He’s basically a kaiju terminator built in Godzilla’s image made purely out of heavy machinery piloted by the best Ghidorah head. It’s a jarring change of pace compared to previous MechaG’s but it grows on you after a while. With the abundance of weaponry stuffed into him, he feels like a fitting update of the original killing machine, and even if his inclusion feels like an easy way out of the big showdown, it’s fun to see him played as a literal colossal heel for the kings to team up against. Not to mention he looks shockingly good with those red highlights. However, one still can’t help but wonder how and why he was made in this universe, or how he feels like pure heavy machinery one minute and then an extra-large Ultron unit the next.

As for the the big throwdowns we’ve all been waiting for... well, we’re still in the mixed bag deparment. While the fights are all exciting and excellently choreographed, and benefit from some more eclectic lighting and cinematograph, I’m sorry to say that as far as the rematch of the century goes they dropped the ball on this one.

Don’t get me wrong, the fights are all great in their own ways, but there’s a drastic change in the feeling of weight and power with the monsters. Godzilla, Kong, and even Mechagodzilla all feel strangely floaty in most of their fights. One moments they feel like true behemoths shaking the very earth with every movement and then it’s like they’re in Godzilla Unleashed, running, jumping, and throwing each other around with speed that feels that almost makes you wonder if the Hollow Earth’s gravity inversion stuff is leaking out into the world. While it’s all perfectly cool, you can’t help but wonder how Kong is able to leap between aircraft carriers and buildings, when Godzilla got the ability to blow a hole through the Earth itself, or how a colossal machine is able to move so nimbly or why it has to be flashing blue all the time.

It’s fascinating and fun but you just can’t help but wonder how we got from almost posthuman disaster and war movies exploring how we’re at the mercy of the ancient almost mythical forces beyond our comprehension, we’ve found ourselves smack dab in the middle of Bayformers meets Jurassic World levels of Hollywood absurdity where anything and everything can and will happen in the name of getting to the monster fights. Although I can’t say I’m surprised given the director’s take on Death Note made some questionable choices with it’s take on the infamous cast while still coming up with some genuinely inspired choices. Still, all things considered we could have gotten worse compared to ther cinematic universes made by WB and Universal.

As for some misc. thoughts to close up this rambling mess:

-The soundtrack is fantastic. A great continuation of the feel of Skull Island’s mixtape with some truly wonderful picks. Special mention goes to the opening and ending songs, and they GOT AN ELVIS PRESLEY SONG IN HERE! YES!!! The three kings of pop culture together at last!

-While this movie didn’t need to be any more overstuffed, it would have been nice if the rest of the Titans didn’t disappear entirely from this movie. I get that Godzilla: Dominion already explained what happened to them all more or less, but it really is a missed oppurtunity that we never got to see another Titan war. Or Rodan attacking Kong to avenge his pterosaur bretheren from days long past. Speaking of which...

-“Save Mothra” jokes be damned, Mothra would have been a welcome gues star, not just to help break up the big fight, but to show off Godzilla’s softer, more protective side. And yes, I want more Mothzilla. Shut up, we deserve it.

-Boy, Monarch sure does a whole lot of nothing up-top, huh?

-The cinematography is a great update but there’s a little too much neon lighting, especially in the Apex HQ and the Hollow Earth throne room. It feels like they’re trying just a little too hard to sell the more futuristic, Hollywood sci-fi feel.

-The score is... great but not that great. Of course, I’ve always had mixed feelings about Tom Holkenburg (AKA Junkie XL)’s music. I liked Kong’s themes, but they REALLY dropped the ball with Godzilla’s theme. Mechagodzilla’s works really well as long you ignore that it’s just Godzilla’s theme in this movie with an ominious choir added in.

-The new Hollow Earth creatures are all perfectly fine. Actually, I thought they were another highlight! Especially the Warbats, Hellhawks, and Doug the Titanus Foetodon Man.

-I want to do a release the extended cut campaign but I don’t think any of us have the energy for that s**t anymore.

Can I get another headcanon/oneshot post about Techno and Tommy?Something similar to the sword stealing scenario 🙃 I love your Au!!

(Thank youuuu :DDD I’m sorry for such a long post!)

Alright I’m very tired so I’m sorry for any grammar mistakes but let's go!

-Tommy had a day off from school and was spending it at home with Techno, who was doing house work because Phil works and Wilbur is out

-Tommy asks Techno to show him how to do some weird acrobatic type move and Techno said no, Tommy kept bugging him until Techno said he’d teach him to walk on his hands.

-Techno got out an old mat and started showing Tommy how to do a handstand but Tommy has no sense of balance

“I thought you said you’d teach me how to walk on my hands!” Tommy complained, shifting his hands, trying to stay upright.

“I am but you have to be able to do a handstand first, that’s like half of the process.” Techno said, holding Tommy’s ankles so he wouldn’t flop onto the mat.

“Well I’m ready! I can do it!” Tommy said.

“Really? So if I let go of your legs then you will stay upright, completely balanced? No issues?”

“Of course!” So Techno let go.

He fell over.

“Graceful,” Techno commented dryly, as Tommy scrambled into a sitting position.

“Shut up! If it’s so easy then you do it!” Tommy sputtered

Techno just stared at him, taking a few steps back then leaned forwards into a handstand. He looked at Tommy from between his arms then walked over on his hands looking Tommy dead in the eyes.

Then he smirked.

“It’s easy, Thomas, easy.” Tommy stuck his tongue out in response.

- “I’m bored!” Tommy groaned as Techno stood back up on his feet.

-Tommy asks if they can go into town, Techno says sure. Tommy immediately wants to go see Tubbo so they walk over towards his parents stand/shop

-Tommy starts asking for Tubbo then goes to see him by the animals while Techno just kind of stands there, making bad small talk with Tubbo’s parents, because social anxiety.

-While Tommy is talking to Tubbo, who is trying to work, a man dressed in fancy clothes approaches them.

-”How much for a stall?” He asked, adjusting his tie. Tubbo gave him a confused look, “What?”

The man glared at him, “How much for a stall, boy? I’m in a hurry.”

“I-I don’t understand what you mean sir,”

The man glared at Tubbo then closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose, “I’ll ask you one more time, How much for a stall?”

“I don’t-”

“Damn it! Do you know who I am? God, I’ll find someone else!” The man snapped, waving his hands frantically before storming off, muttering about ‘useless children.’

-Tommy blinked for a moment, still in shock before starting; “That assh-”

“It’s fine Tomm-”

“No it’s not! Who does he think he is? Coming in here treating you like that! Someone should beat some manners into that guy!” Tommy glared at the man as he continued down the road, probably to harass more people.

“Tommy, it’s fine, really-”

“Too late I already have an idea!” Tommy said, sliding off the fence he was sitting on, Tubbo groaned.

“Just make sure that Techno is distracted!”

-Tommy slipped behind the shop and ran along an alley until he caught up with the Fancy man, who was trading documents and papers at another shop.

-He waited for the right opportunity as the man pulled out his wallet, Tommy walked by and stumbled into Fancy man, knocking them both to the ground, scattering the man's papers everywhere.

“Would you watch where you’re going?” The man snapped, grabbing at his paperwork, Tommy shuffled through the papers, feeling for the wallet, as he did he apologized profusely, handing the man his things. Once his fingers glazed over the cool leather of the man's wallet he slipped it into his pocket before handing the man the rest of his stuff.

“Once again, I’m very sorry sir.” Then he turned and walked away as the Fancy man dusted himself off.

-Tommy was a few stores down when the man suddenly shouted, “Wait, I’m missing something. Hey! You kid! Where’s my wallet!”

-And instead of replying, Tommy panicked then started sprinting. He dodged through crowds of people, trying to find an alley to duck into as the man thundered after him.

- He swerved into one, crashing into some trash cans in the process and continued, he could still hear the Fancy man and what sounded like guards chasing him. This caused him to panic even more, he couldn’t get caught, it would cause so many issues with his family and would cost so much money.

-He was jerked out of his thoughts, literally, as someone yanked him to the side. He yelped and fought against their hold until,

“Stop it you nerd!”

“Techno? What are you doing? How did you find me?”

“What did you do?”

“Answer my question first!”

“Mine is more important!”

“Okay fine! So, someone was being really rude to Tubbo so I thought that if I was able to take something from them it would teach them a lesson about being an asshole.” Tommy explained, he started off strong before slowly quieting.

Techno just stared at him, “How-In what universe-Why would you do that?! It doesn’t even make sense!”

“Yes it does! How did you even find me anyways? Did Tubbo tell you?”

“No, I saw you the second you left the shop.”

“What! How? I snuck out all sneaky like!”

“Nevermind that, we have to get out of here.” Techno said, looking around.

“Wait so you’re not gonna make me return it?”

“Hang on, I hear voices over here,” Someone new interrupted their conversation.

“Oh my goddddddd,” Techno groaned, he grabbed Tommy’s wrist and started running. Tommy could barely keep up with Techno, let alone predict where they were going. Techno was doubling around, looping, and zig zagging in every direction.

-They made it closer to the third circle when Techno spotted a balcony, “Get ready to jump Tommy.” He put his hands together and boosted Tommy onto the ledge, then jumped on a nearby dumpster and leapt onto the balcony.

-They waited in silence as the guards searched the ground frantically before moving on, desperate to find the thief.

-Techno waited a few extra minutes, just in case before scoffing to himself, “They must be new, no well seasoned trainee would have missed those obvious tracks.” He turned to Tommy, “Are you okay?”

-Tommy nodded then asked, grinning, “So you really aren’t gonna make me return it?”

-Techno slapped him upside the head.

(Hope you like it!)

AEW Double or Nothing 2021

In which the spirit of WCW is alive in confusing and delightful ways and we are left to parse whether overbooking and extracurriculars are offset by having actually very good wrestling happening at the same time.

- Lessons learned from Revolution on the production side? Maybe just cool it on pyro, though the rappelling adventure in the Stadium Stampede showed some of that now-characteristic 'trust us it'll look better on TV' flair. Hot crowd tends to paper over most woes, and the crowd was pretty hot. My one gripe is that the casino theme is hanging around like yesterday's takeout containers. Nothing wrong with clinging to a theme, I just think it's time for season 2. My suggestion? Under the Sea.

*Pre-Card Serena Deeb (C) v Riho for the NWA Women's Championship (***1/2) - Serena Deeb's star has finally risen. She's a remarkably consistent technician and she can get a match out of anyone at this point. She's working at the level of Mercedes Martinez or Madison Eagles at this point, it's amazing that she was overlooked or considered fit only to be a coach for so long. With the NWA belt she has this new swagger, she's basically everything Tessa Blanchard might bring to the table with none of the downsides (Serena has a lot of friends and seems like a lovely person, even!) - Riho's back and here to stay. Her time in Stardom didn't do much for my evaluation of her, which is that there are many better wrestlers that would be better representatives of the joshi style and she's merely pretty good. - The match was very good. Serena showcased a champion's aggression against a sympathetic Riho, they really work well against each other, Deeb's technical prowess against Riho's flexibility led to a very dynamic finish.

*Main Card Hangman Adam Page v Brian Cage (***1/2) - Here the shenanigans start. Brian Cage is on Team Taz, Team Taz has nothing else much to do tonight, so why wouldn't Team Taz flex their muscles, bait us with HOOK, etc? (Because it would be nice to have some variety in the card in terms of a match where one competitor stands across from another competitor?) - Hangman is (checking notes) yeah, still over as fuck, as befits the Anxious Millennial Cowboy. Cage terrifies me, he's a child's drawing of a body builder. He do be very agile for a man of his immense musculature tho. They match up well, Page is biggish for a flyer, Cage loves to play catch. Nothing much to write home about, other than Hangman's beautiful moonsault to the floor and what was overall a very good curtain jerker. - Okay fine, I am curious about Cage's reluctance to lean on the goons, Starks can't come back soon enough.

The Young Bucks v Jon Moxley & Eddie Kingston (***) - I will not be referring to Mox & Eddie as (The) Wild Things because it gives me 'he calls it the wacky line' flashbacks for some reason. - The Bucks have to cheat and abuse Rick Knox's attention span constantly to be on even footing with Mox & Eddie, which is a clever sort of thing that gets washed out by the appearance of LG and Karl Anderson, which again, is cool in a vacuum but was the story of the evening. - Pace was weird - repetitive in eliminating Eddie, then Mox fights back, failed hope spot, Bucks team up, Eddie saves x2/3 in a row. - Mox, unlike Cody (in so many ways,) will probably actually be taking some time off with Renee, which is the kind of thing I would prefer not to know in terms of booking, but they really uh, put him down on the canvas here, and it felt pretty finale-esque.

Casino Battle Royale (n/r, but on the balance pro) - Any changes to the theme of the PPV would likely include changing up the nonsense suit format of these largely joyless slogs. - Obviously anticipating a NJPW talent, or... I dunno, actually -- Lio Rush was a surprise. Got in a quick demonstration of his otherworldly quickness, and you know what, there's probably a fun place for him in AEW. He'll need some friends, of course, feel like Team Taz might fit his temperament. I wonder if he was aware of the Mark Henry news... - Christian does not need to win this kind of match to get a title shot, obviously, but that said it was super lovely to use him to give Jungle Boy the shine. Jungle Boy would be a license to print money if he was even as big as Hangman. - Could register some continued griping about how Penta is not getting his due in AEW but he also literally was dressed as the Joker so I'm low on sympathy on this one particular night.

Anthony Ogogo v Cody Rhodes (*) - I did not like this. It's hard for me to read jingoism as a face move to begin with, and Cody's was egregiously tone deaf and kinda silly yet delivered without a trace of irony because Cody doesn't do irony on purpose, ridiculous neck tattoo aside. - Great argument to be made that Ogogo just isn't experienced enough to be winning matches against Cody. But like, what are we doing here? Cody needs to take some time off, maybe. I thought that's what was happening when he had his mini feud with Penta that really just ended in quick decisive Cody win. I though maybe Cody was being turned when QT and The Factory snapped-- sure, they're a group of impotent player 2s, but Cody is an out of touch elitist with a callous and manipulative streak. Alas, also no. America #1. - Cody is approximately 8 times as tough as Billy Gunn based on his weathering of the one punch man. Match ran a bit long given how little there was to go on. Cody gigged? Quelle surprise. - Cody had the best match on the card like, 3 out of the first 4 AEW events or something, and that was all booking and storytelling. I do hope Cody follows Moxley's lead into a little sabbatical.

Miro (C) v Lance Archer for the TNT Championship (**1/2) - Card's hossiest hoss match, a quick burst reminiscent of a car wreck. Absolutely hit on what it should've hit on but a little slow moving considering it went all of 10 minutes. - I will not complain about Jake the Snake, who I love. And also the gimmick spot, with Miro very astutely yeeting what was definitely a snake in a bag (surely.) back down the tunnel.

Dr Britt Baker, DMD v Hikaru Shida (C) for the AEW Women's Championship (***) - Picked up a lot of steam toward the end but seemed a little toothless (heh) until the last five. - Shida 'deserved' some more time as champion in front of crowds but also it's time to let heel Britt reach her peak, I can't even imagine how obnoxious she can be as the champ, it's going to be great.

Sting & Darby Allin v Ethan Page & Scorpio Sky (***1/2) - Such is the power of STING that I feel like I might be underrating this match... I mean it was an okay match about very simply getting some revenge and the sixty year old man did a very subdued Code Red and a slightly less subdued dive. He's also Sting. They missed an opportunity in calling it the 'Scorpio' Death Drop, but the main takeaway here is you see something like this where it's The Icon and you start to understand why WWE trots out their legends to come out of incredibly still kick ass without bending their knees. - The difference, I guess, is that Sting is absolutely being used to build up Darby Allin, whereas it's not like the fed brought back Goldberg and his attendant aura to pump up... anyone but Goldberg?

Kenny Omega (C) v PAC v Orange Cassidy for the AEW World Championship (****) - Off the top I have to say I'm very sad that the rest of the Galaxy's Greatest Friends were seen only very briefly, nice of them to bring OC's backpack. - Also have to point out that PAC's promo featured one of my favourite jokes, that Kenny must be short for Kenneth as a sort of legal/birth name belonging to a professional wrestler. (See also: Samoa Joseph) - And Mr Cassidy certainly did try in this match, ragdoll sells and all. Kenneth and PAC are absurd talents who bring aerial, power and technical maneuvers in equal measure and OC is not doing any of those on the same level, but he picked his spots, showed his genre savvy and hung in there to the point that he wasn't just the fall guy. - The extracurriculars continue in a match that was already a little overboard for silliness due to asymmetry... I think if you're the Invisible Hand it would've made sense to save up all your tricks for this match, but who am I to question the golden goose? - Sure, Kenny and Don ran the classic heel manager interference spot and taking out the ref in desperation spot but having to take out the ref because PAC wouldn't break the hold is fun, as is the stupid/inspired sense in running the 'smash opponent with the belt' spot four times so as none of your heavy gold prizes feel left out. (I love that AAA Mega Championship, they weren't on TV so we get to see it?) - "Fuck You, Don," indeed.

The Inner Circle v The Pinnacle in 'Stadium Stampede II' (***1/2) - This one had to grow on me for two reasons, first that it's usually pretty unforgivable to co-opt the main event spot from the championship match, and second to law of diminishing returns on dumb gimmick matches. - But grow it did. There's a full on meat locker? Commentary will refer to a cardboard cut-out of Shahid Khan as Tony Khan's father (that's canon now,) and Jericho will lovingly pat it? Konnan happened to be the DJ at whatever night club there is a Jaguar Stadium? Spears surrounds himself dramatically with chairs and his hoisted by his own petard? - Ultimately it comes down to letting Sammy shine. His involvement with the Inner Circle has sometimes come at the cost of being able to showcase that prior to AEW he was an ascendant talent in PWG, on his way to Ricochet level feats of acrobatic excess. Still feel like Sammy could've/should've been the one tossed off the cage a few weeks ago, but even better is being the guy getting the pin in the ring.

Fools Rush In

Part 1

I am participating in @wackydrabbles prompts: “I don’t plan to stop”

A/N: In this, MC does not exist in Liam’s social season. OC Riley lives in Las Vegas.

A/N/N: This series is crazy lol

Series Premise: With two weeks until Liam is to marry Madeleine -- his pick during the social season -- the guys throw him a bachelor party in Vegas. After a drunken night, he finds himself with more than he bargained for.

Book: The Royal Romance

Word Count: 1152

Inspired by Carrie Underwoods song, ‘Last name’

Perma tags: @emceesynonymroll​ @romanticatheart-posts​ @burnsoslow​ @dcbbw​ @ao719​ @jessiembruno​ @hopefulmoonobject​ @texaskitten30​ @janezillow​ @merridithsmiscellany-blog​ @mskaneko​ @loveellamae​ @queenjilian​ @sirbeepsalot​ @pedudley​ @caroldxnvxrs​ @jovialyouthmusic​ @forthebrokenheartedthings​ @desireepow-1986​ @bebepac​ @kingliam2019​ @lovablegranny​ @cordoniaqueensworld​ @amandablink​ @blueaster-blog1​ @liamsx-world

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High above the Las Vegas strip, on the rooftop lounge of the Rio Hotel and Casino, the Voodoo Nightclub was rife with energy and spirited chatter. Covered overhead by only a cluster of twinkling stars, the patio's dancefloor was packed with rhythmic freestyling movements to the DJ's techno beats. A large crowd gathered around the flair bartenders who wowed with their acrobatic-like tossing of bottles and shakers. Nightlifers admired the vast cityscape of flashing neon and rolling gold letters from fifty-one stories below. 

It was noisy and upbeat. 

It was full of gigantic cocktails and mixers. 

And on this warm spring night, surrounded by loud music and drunken tourists, Liam sat at a table alone, wondering how the hell he got abandoned at his own bachelor party.

Well, he wasn't completely alone, the ringleader of this little shindig was at the bar drinking shots out of the bellybuttons of some randos while dressed as Elvis.

He could almost kick his brother's ass for getting him into this position. He was the spare. This was supposed to be Leo's problem; he was born and bred for this position. Now Liam was stuck unhappily engaged to be married to his brother's former fiance in two weeks, who coincidentally was also his step-cousin. I'm the white trash King of Cordonia, he mused, that's what they'll call me.

The second in command: his best friend, Drake, took off 30 minutes ago to spend some of his big winnings on the boulevard while bitching about ending his dry spell.

And the last time he saw Maxwell, the youngest Beaumont was trying to show off a dance move on the balcony's railing. One of the cage dancers assured the mesmerized crowd he landed safely on cloth awning a few stories below.

At least the lovely couple having sex behind him briefly engaged in conversation, even if it was only to ask him to be their lookout. 

He had nothing better to do and liked the concoction Leo ordered him, so why not. Viva Las Vegas!

While he sipped the rum and fruit-flavored cocktail and tried not to choke on his straw from the couple behind him repeatedly banging into his chair, he looked up to see a young woman approaching him.

"Jax?" She flashed a hopeful smile at Liam.

Liam shook his head, trying not to get lost in her beautiful smile and scintillating brown eyes that reflected the clubs flashing neon like glass. "Uh, no. It's Liam." I wish I were Jax.

Her smile faded. "Oh! Well, shit. I'm sorry. He was supposed to meet me here 20 minutes ago, and you resemble his tinder profile pic."

Do I pretend to know what the hell that is? He nodded with an awkward chuckle. "Good old Tinder."

She unlocked her phone and held it out to him. Liam studied the picture of the man who did look a lot like him. He read the bio aloud: "Jax, 28. I always keep a loaded gun beside my bed in the event of intruders so I can shoot myself to avoid meeting new people." He grimaced with wry amusement before glancing back to her. "I think we know what happened to Jax."

"Damn." She slumped her shoulders in disappointment until she noticed the activity taking place at the table behind Liam. She stooped down with a slight smirk and leaned into his ear. "I hate to tell you this, but there are people having sex behind you."

Liam scratched the tip of his nose. "Yeah, I know. I'm their lookout. And I don't plan to stop until those two lovebirds are finished."

The woman winced and scrunched her brows. "Really?"

"Noooo," Liam whined. "Get me the hell out of here," he pleaded.

She laughed and grasped onto his wrist. "Come on, Liam. We can sit at the bar together if you'd like."

He looked down at her tiny hand wrapped around his wrist; it was so soft and warm. He smiled up at her. "I'd like that a lot, Miss ..."

"Brooks. Riley Brooks."

Liam rose from his chair, knowing he probably shouldn't go with her. Riley was pretty and sweet, and he was already two sheets to the wind. He couldn't help himself, though; there was something about her.

They took their seats at the bar and ordered a Witch Doctor to share. When the bartender set the massive cocktail in front of them, Riley took a sip from her straw and turned to Liam. "So, what's a good looking guy like yourself doing here alone?"

Liam twisted his straw between his forefinger and thumb, not wanting to discuss his complicated situation, but he was never one to lie. "It's... um ... my bachelor party." 

"Ohhh! I see." Riley scooted away and, with a half-hearted smile, said, "I guess congratulations are in order."

Liam scoffed. "If you knew the whole story, you might not congratulate me so quickly."

"Is she that bad? Surely there's something good about her."

He took a long sip of his drink, then looked at her with a deadpan stare. "Not one."

Riley chuckled. "Do I even wanna know why you're marrying her then?

"Probably not," he quipped.

Liam told her how his friends threw him the bachelor party as one last big hoorah to his freedom and then ditched him for their own pursuits. And how he really wanted to see the Statue of Liberty at the New York New York Hotel, but it wasn't in the guy's plans.

Feeling bad for her new friend, Riley offered to make his dream a reality. After finishing their drink and downing a few Jager bombs, the two of them staggered out.

Liam and Riley swayed down the bustling sidewalk, holding onto one another for balance and cackling the whole way.

"Liam!" Riley animately pointed. "Look! There it is."

Liam lifted his heavy head, and his droopy eyelids widened when he gazed up at the 150-foot replica of Lady Liberty. "Whoa … She... Is … Magnificent." He stood at attention and saluted. "Here's to freedom and … other cool shit," he slurred.

Riley lowered her head and placed a hand over her heart. "God bless America."

Liam shook his head in agreement. "Yes. Yes. Just ... bless the hell out of it. And you know what? The rollercoaster makes it even more ... bitchin."

Riley grabbed his upper arm and shook it hard with excitement. "We gotta ride it, Liam!"

He smirked. "Try to stop me!"

After riding the coaster, both laughed through nausea as they stepped off. 

"Ahhh, that was so much fun! We should go again!" Riley shrieked while hovered over a trash bin.

Liam thought about it until he caught sight of a couple coming out of a wedding chapel across the street.

Liam swung his arm over her shoulder with a grin. “You know what else would be fun?”

Riley giggled. “What?”

“Getting married.”

Part 2!

After this things will go down a weird route, and Mynci will become more ✨sassy✨

Tagging; @jordanstrophe

-- tw;; captivity/slave whump, intimate whumper, blood mention, accidental self harm, threathening --

Pora looked at the thin pole in fear. They couldn’t even balance normally, how were they supposed to balance on that with one foot? Mynci made it look so easy, but he had years and years of experience with balancing on all sorts of things. He jumped back down from the pole, grinning at the slave.

“Go on, you do it now.”

Their heart started beating even faster as they slowly approached the pole, it was higher then they thought. They pulled themselves up and stood on the top with one foot. It didn’t last long as they quickly lost balance and fell to the floor. Pain shot through their arm and they bit back a scream.

Mynci sighed in disapproval. Such a basic thing and they couldn’t even do it.

“That was hardly 5 seconds!,” He shook his head. “Next is trampoline jumping, you better not mess it up again.”

They groaned as they got back up. Trampoline jumping didn’t sound too bad, but of course he was going to make it hard for them. They hurried to catch up with him as he lead them to the trampoline. He went up first to show Pora how to do it, he did a series of acrobatic stunts, they had never even seen half of them before. They weren’t athletic at all, nor did they know how to copy what he did, but the punishment would be worse if they didn’t try.

So hesitantly they went up, silently praying they’d be able to do at least of the tricks. They actually managed a backflip, which was a win in their book, but their mind was already blank on the other things he had shown them. Surely he couldn’t see that they weren’t actually doing them with that blindfold on right? He always relied on hearing after all. They jumped around for another couple seconds before getting off.

“You failed yet again.” Mynci said.

“What? But I did it!”

He sighed and pulled the slave closer by their collar. “I’m not fucking stupid. I can tell you didn’t actually do it.” He let go of them. “I’ll punish you for lying later.”

Pora let out a shaky breath and silently followed him to the small stage. Behind the curtains there was a box with various balls, knives, torches, hats, cards and some other stuff he regularly used while performing for kids. He took out four of the small knives and casually strolled over to the middle. Then he started juggling them, and the slave could feel their heart drop to the ground.

“Ever learned to juggle, dear?” He smiled at the slave, showing too many teeth.

“No, sir.”

He stopped juggling and caught the knives in his hands. “Well in that case,” he handed them to Pora. “I hope you’re a fast learner. Try not to drop them, each knife you drop is another hour I’ll make you perform in front of an actual crowd.”

They were supposed to juggle knives? They shouldn’t have been surprised. That Mynci was sadistic was clear, but they never expected him to do something like this. They took a deep breath and tried to copy what he did, throw the knives in the air one by one and catch them, simple enough. One of the blades fell directly on one of their palms making them cry out in pain, the other knives clattered to the floor as well.

Pora was holding onto their wrist, desperately looking up at Mynci, hoping he’d help. He reached out and pulled the knife out of their hand, and they cried out again. Blood was pouring out, dripping to the floor.

“You dropped all of them, couldn’t even juggle 1, I’m very disappointed.” He sighed heavily and started to make his way out of the tent. “Go to your room. You have a long day ahead.”

The slave sobbed and stumbled off the stage, heading to the back room. They were pressing on the wound as hard as they could, trying to stop the bleeding at least a bit. Were they even going to survive? If they did, Mynci could probably just bring them back using his magic. They sat down in their corner and closed their eyes. They didn’t try to hold back tears, it was useless.

The sound of something being placed in front of them made them jump and look up. Val was staring at their hand with her big eyes, she had a first aid kit with her. She took some supplies out the kit and gently took their hand in hers. Taking a moment to inspect the wound, she poured disinfectant over it, then bandaged it up carefully. They made eye contact for a moment before she left just as fast as she came.

Pora looked at their hand trying to figure out what exactly just happened. Did Mynci send her? Maybe she heard the screams and just came to check. Either way, it felt nice to have human contact, contact that wasn’t intended to hurt them. They knew tomorrow was going to be filled with pain, they should rest and hope that the audience would be gently on them for once.

They woke up with a not so great start. First of all, they were inside a cage, one small enough to keep them on their knees. And secondly, they were inside a different tent by the looks of things. They’d seen the yellow and purple walls before, but never been inside. There was hay covering the floor outside the cage, some big buckets of water tucked in the corner and smaller buckets with food in the other. They assumed that this is where the horses stayed, at least during the night. But why were they here? What was going on?

Faint circus music was playing somewhere nearby, probably in the tent just next to it. They assumed they were doing a morning show with the horses. That didn’t explain much about why they were in there. The sound of crunchy footsteps made them look up.

“Hey sleeping beauty, took a nice nap? You can be quite the heavy sleeper, you know. Almost thought you were dead!” Kins laughed at himself, his voice echoed in the room.

They didn’t know how to respond and remained silent. He didn’t seem to bothered by it. The jester leaned against the wall and sighed.

”Things were nicer before you came here, honestly. Whenever Mynci got bored he’d come to me and ask me to tell him jokes, when he was frustrated he’d ask me to play my music..now he just goes to you instead,” he made eye contact with the slave, then turned around and started walking in circles. “Not to blame you, but I’m kind of blaming you. Anyway, Mynci said you’re gonna be part of the performance tonight, as punishment or something. Not sure how doing something so cool would be considered a punishment but whatever. You get to walk the tight ropes! It’s really fun, I’ve been practicing myself. Honestly you’re lucky you get to do the fun stuff and I don’t.”

He fell silent staring at the door for a couple seconds.

“Just be ready, that’s all I’m saying.” He muttered as he left at a fast pace.

Yata Misaki Fighting Style Analysis

Surprise! Non-BSD content! I decided I needed to go back to what I like best—fighting style breakdowns. Not to say I don’t adore theorizing and characterizing and all, but I started with fighting style breakdowns so they’re my favorite :) And I’ve already analyzed most of the fighting material for Bungo, so I figured I’d branch out. (Might do a Dazai one in the future...thoughts?)

Anyway, spoilers for K and K: Return of Kings. 

So, Yata’s really fun to watch. He’s only got one fight in season 1 of K, but he has a lot more in Return of Kings. Some basics--Yata is the only character I’ve seen who fights with a skateboard, and it gives his fights a lot of flair. Plus, we get to see him use three different weapons, all in 26 episodes--a baseball bat in season 1, then a quarterstaff, and then a retractable quarterstaff. And he can manifest a strong Red Aura (flameo, hotman) from his fists, his skateboard, and his weapons. 

Yata’s incredibly entertaining to watch, because while his style has a lot of acrobatic flips and jumps, he hits like a freight train. As the “vanguard” of HOMRA, he’s their heaviest hitter. He cracks pavement when he lands his jumps and once kicked Fushimi through a brick wall, and managed to bat away an entire billboard that Kuroh threw at him. He’s also capable of using his skateboard to block and redirect attacks. 

This man’s balance is absolutely ridiculous. If you look at just one sequence from that first fight, Yata flips over a sword thrust, goes on the attack with his fists, blocks with his skateboard by crouching, transitions seamlessly into a sweep, then does a goddamn back-handspring--onto his skateboard. Yata’s technical skill is off the charts. Yata is very good with staff weapons, too. He spins them around his neck and shoulders to block attacks and jeez, it makes for some gorgeous sequences. 

He’s also stupid fast, capable of dodging bullets at close range (anime bullshit? definitely, but it’s still cool). This man manages to kick Fushimi’s knife into the air and catch it. Granted, it was a warning shot, but still. Plus his skateboard means he’s surprisingly mobile on large battlefields, like when he’s chasing down Shiro in season 1 and during the attack on the Greens in season 2.

Honestly, you’d think that Yata--with his brash attitude and his tendency to go for strong rather than fast hits--would be a straightforward enough fighter. But Yata’s real advantage is in his unpredictability and versatility. Acrobatic flips, his skateboard’s maneuverability, and his skill with bludgeoning weapons mean he’s really hard to hit in the first place.

There’s two ways to get a hit in on Yata. Either you take him entirely by surprise, like Saruhiko in season 1 when he pulls a knife out of nowhere and gets him in the shoulder, or you hit him faster than he can dodge. And this man dodges fast. This means he’s weakest against enemies he hasn’t fought before with unknown abilities, like Kuroh in season 1. 

Teamwork isn’t really a strength of his. He and Saruhiko fight Sukuna twice, and while they lose spectacularly the first time, they crush him the second time. In the first fight, they weren’t working together so much as “both fighting the same dude”. In the second, they actually managed to coordinate and plan for each other’s strengths. It’s really the only time you ever see Yata fight with a comrade, because his fights are usually one-on-one.  

Sidenote: when Yata and Saruhiko fight together? It’s kinda awesome. Yata’s a close-range heavy hitter with acrobatic skill, which means he’s fantastic in melee. Saruhiko has the ability to back him up from mid-range with his knives, and the fact that he’s really smart means he’s pretty good at adapting to whatever Yata’s doing to take advantage of openings. And if Yata’s ever outmatched in the melee or needs a quick save, he has his sword to jump in. 

The best way to fight him is to take advantage of his personality. Mudslinging at HOMRA and Mikoto get him mad, and he fights worse when he’s emotionally invested. If you watch his fights, Yata performs extremely well until someone starts talking shit or he gets frustrated. When he’s pissed, it’s like he forgets about all his acrobatic skill to charge in--and he gets his ass beat. 

Was this post an excuse to fangirl about just how amazing the fights in K are? Possibly. Because they’re ridiculously pretty, particularly in season 2. Anyway, hope this was helpful to someone! I’ll be back to answering asks and irregularly scheduled Bungou Stray Dogs content tomorrow :)