#it is in fact also great at getting ppl to move away from the sad or embarrassing topic. even if the tradeoff is being more offputting | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

petewentzisblack1312 · 4 months

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hi i wanted to ask something but also share something personal as well. my q is: do you feel like your relationship w social media has changed? meaning, do you catch / notice when you are on it for too long and you start to notice, and then you say: okay let's take a break. for me, i have been online for a long time ever since i was a kid, and now my relationship to it is i only limit myself an hour to being on my phone. as an adult now i am no longer social media "obsessed". like, when i am in school i am not thinking about online, i am present when im at school. i feel like i am really close to just deleting sm tbh. it does not grant me happiness like it used to. now as an adult i feel this need to live my life freely.

i also wanted to ask what are ur thoughts on content influencers? to me when i see these ppl i think...i could never post about everything about my life, but then again understanding that it is just a highlight reel. no one is posting every sad / frustrating thing that happens in their life as influencer, only the "great" parts.

this is an interesting question! i think ive never really had a relationship to social media where i feel like i need to post constantly or felt pressured to share everything. while im definitely the most online out of my household, compared to a lot of other people im not really very present online. i dont like using twitter, i only really use instagram to look at and post art and occasionally post a picture of my cat or nature or food on my main account, i dont really get up to much and i never use facebook unless i have to. i hate it. even here on tumblr i dont post a lot about my personal life unprompted, and this is the social media site i use the most by far. i do scroll tumblr a lot, i do watch a lot of youtube videos (though almost exclusively video essays on politics and recently also artist vlogs) and i do notice myself scrolling a bit too much, particularly when im overstimulated but instead of doing something less stimulating im anxious and looking for a distraction so i like. scroll harder. but ive never been like doing something else and thought 'man, i wish i was scrolling right now'. i dont really know. i do have trouble putting my phone down, like when i need to sleep, but i have trouble putting ANYTHING down. games, books, art or writing or projects im working on, music im listening to, i dont think tumblr is special, its just another activity for me to be distracted by.

all that being said, i did leave social media for a while. i had a really bad experience in a fandom on tumblr (not the pwams incident. that led me to step away from bandom and move to another fandom) and honestly it made me realise that the problem i had with social media wasnt that i was using it too much, but that i had a toxic relationship with the communities i was interacting with on there. the nature of my relationship to social media was unhealthy, not the fact that i had one that was a large part of my life. i think when i wasnt using any social media i actually wasnt in a great place either, because i was isolated from people id cared about, especially since i had just undergone a very traumatic incident, and because of that became very isolated from my in person friends as well, even before the pandemic pushed me away from even the acquaintances i had made. i was worried about coming back to tumblr, but i think ive grown and learned in such a way that i know how i like to comport myself in cyberspaces, and that its been good for me in a way. which is weird, but. i think id kind of have to go in depth about my life and how the pandemic affected me and the specific nature of coming of age in st lucia and stuff. which i dont want to do haha.

as for influencers. i hate the concept. i understand it, and i dont universally hate influencers as a whole, but like. theres this specific kind of content creator where the thing they are sharing is just their life and there isnt like a specific thing theyre logging, like an artist sharing their creative process and how they manage their life around that, or a chef sharing recipes, and its not like theyre doing it just to do it, they have the goal of growing a following, and theyre not advertising anything but themself, like JUST themself, as a person-brand, and i find that so deeply annoying and repulsive. and like thats strong wording its a dog eat dog world and the girlies of all genders need to secure the bag like i get it. i get it. but its revolting to me. like. the vlogbrothers werent trying to get famous they were using youtube to communicate with each other and as an open video diary and people found them to be interesting personalities to watch. right. do you get it. annoyingly i gotta put myself out there if i want people to find my art and pins and stuff so i have to fuckin. make videos. sell people on me. the idea of making vlogs makes me dry heave bc im not important i dont want to have to sell myself like im important i dont want to put my face on a camera and implicitly say with every quirky performed statement i make 'i matter, pay attention to me, i need to exist so look at me' but unfortunately i might have to. a video essay i could do. thats me saying something. but a vlog? with the goal of people finding my stuff? good god. it sounds like poison.

#dils declares #my tripod is broken so im using that as an excuse to not vlog.#i can do shortform video. thats dispassionate.#thats 60 seconds of selling myself or more likely my stuff in a highly edited way #there is no veneer of authenticity. no kayfabe.#i can do that.#but a whole fucking vlog? nauseating.

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awsugar · 1 year

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literally like i appreciate streamers because they make it so fans who couldn't go to shows get to witness them but if you're not even streaming like... put the phone away. enjoy the show. jump around a bit and actually watch the stage. and honestly if you are streaming put the phone away like it's great to be able to see shows i'm not at but if it's at the expense of your own enjoyment of the show and of other people in the crowd who now have a phone in their face for the next hour then it's not really worth it

yea like on one hand i love having a stream to watch when theres a show happening but theres a reason i had barricade so many times last year and did not stream is because that is not my priority!!!! and it shouldnt be your priority imo. i feel like if you wanna stream the whole thing yes props to you but you should stand in the back of the pit where no one is going to mind you standing still and hodling your phone up for the entire set. but like i remember at one show there was someone live tweeting the whole thing from barricade and i know ppl want like internet points but it is so sad to think youre in the front row and looking at your phone the whole time. i think its really important especially if youre in the front where the members are actually looking at you and making eye contace, to be present and acually enjoy the show and take it in. i have a lot of pics and videos from all of my shows but i would generally just take my phone out for a minute and snap a few pics because i dont want them to see me with my phone out 😭 but yea like also one of my biggest complaints at frank shows in the past were the fact that no one in the crowd was moving and everyone was just standing there sometimes recording the entire thing bc like its frank from mcr and it makes it seem like youre not there cause you actually enjoy the music. it made me really sad. and then those people who just wanted to record the whole thing would get mad about us starting a pit or crowdsurfing. so yea i dont think theres anything wrong with taking pics or videos at your shows cause i do it too but i think were in an era of like a sea of phones instead of faces singing along and its like...it makes me feel bad...

#anonymous #asks

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magic-number-3 · 1 year

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Top 5 ajr songs for the top 5 ask

shaking my fist like an old man darn you for making me answer this question!!! Ugh how am I supposed to choose?? I’m doing 6 cause fuck you i cant narrow it down anymore (not really fuck you its a joke <3) anyways the songs are under the cut cause I decided to explain my reasoning and it got very very too long. So in no particular order:

Don’t Throw Out My Legos - this song. REAL AND TRUE. I relate personally so much to this song because ~I moved away from home to follow my dreams~ and while the song is about wanting to preserve your childhood home and/or bedroom beacuse you dont want to face the fact of growing up, to me its also about wanting to preserve those sacred spaces in case, ya know. Follow your dreams fails and you have to return home. And so for me that has to be my top 5. Like people say ‘oh this song scratches an itch in my brain’ this song does that to my soul. N E way.

World’s Smallest Violin - ~its the mental illness luv~ . my 2nd most listened to song on spotify of all time and it only came out last year. Its killer

Turning Out - this was one of the first AJR songs I ever heard after that sponegbob song lmao (What Everyone’s Thinking EP, thank u for ur service) and DAMN if I havent cried listening to this song. Multiple times. I interpret this song as one of those where people are like ‘i dont feel like a whole person’ and i relate to that. like im TECHNICALLY a fully grown adult now but boy is that only technically. ‘You say I turned out fine / I think I'm still turning out’ and the ending of the song, ‘I'm a little kid, and so are you / Don't you go and grow up before I do / I'm a little kid with so much doubt / Do you want to be there to see how I turn out? / Cause I’m still turning out’ . Theres a feeling, a need to tell people whats going on because ppl think ur fine but ur not and youre nervous of an inevitable crash thats coming that no one will understand. But you dont know how to tell people. Youre scared to and you dont know how to make them understand. Anyway :(

Burn The House Down - this song goes SO. HARD. Its got a killer beat and this genius lyrics explanation says it all: ‘The titular line of the song is a blunt invitation for a sort of political revolution, at least in a metaphorical sense, in that the whole system will be replaced bottom-up with something new’. lets go burn the house down.

Way Less Sad - also my 5th most listened to song of all time on spotify. Like I’ve said before, its very uplifting and optimistic song to me. Maybe things aren’t great, but they’re better than they once were. And theres something very comforting abt not accepting that you dont have to be 'Happy' - whatever that means - that you can just be better than you once were. it relieves the pressure a little bit.

Karma - its very similar to worlds smallest violin, but the way that the musicality pushes the feeling and ideas in the song makes it just completely different imo. The way the music is constantly pushing the song forward - it never lets up and jack is in a rush to get all of these feelings out and he doesnt understand why he feels this way or why these things are the way they are and it all comes to a head with the final bit of the song when its pretty much silent, just him talking. The way the instrumentals push forward the concept and meaning of the lyrics is just some genius music making imo. Jack talking and talking and the way it speeds up and theres barely time to take a breath if youre singing along - the FEELING of the song, struggling to get these words out. The heart of it is very dear to me and meant a lot to me when it came out. I’m lucky that when I sing along now its not so much as a ‘these are my words i never knew how to say’. Its concepts no longer reflect my own stage of life, but when it did this song was very dear to me. Still is. Regardless of favoritism in relation to myself and simply as a piece of music, I do think it is possibly one of their BEST songs.

Some other faves cause how can I just mention FIVE??

100 Bad Days, the spiritual predecessor to Way Less Sad. GOES HARD

Next Up Forever and Finale - At first I was so bummed they didnt do an overture because I genuinely am such a slut for ajrs overtures but I love the way they these songs work as bookends to this album and I love the ideas explored in these two songs and the way they bounce off each other

#ask me my top 5 #my asks #my posts #seylaaurora #i got a little TOO into this but ya know whatevs lol #its only my fave band of all time

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mcrcki · 1 year

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Was that [ALBA BAPTISTA]? Oh no no, that was just [ELLIE WILLIAMS], a [CANON CHARACTER] from [THE LAST OF US]. They are [EIGHTEEN] years old, use [THEY/SHE], and [ARE] aware that they are not actually from Washington DC. Too bad they can’t stray from this city for long.

** the last of us hbo series spoilers **

how long has your character been here -

around two months? they’ve gotten settled out of the government housing, thank god for that cause that place reminded them too much of fedra school. they’ve moved in with their new roomie, sarah. still haven’t asked their last name, but ellie’s okay with that. they’re still getting settled and don’t really talk about their life much either.

what is your character’s job -

gremlin child idk ??? honestly , i think they’d end up going back to school, figure it out from here. i really don’t think she’s well adjusted enough to hold down like any steady job right now.

where has your character been pulled from in their fandom -

end of season one of the hbo series. this is where i show my fake fan vibes and say i have never played the games gkfdjg but im waiting for the release on steam, but for now, i will be playing ellie as fully from the hbo show.. that also means that i do not know tlou2 so pls no spoilers until i play it kgdfjlg

has any magic affected your character -

nope! their memories are fully intact!! though, they’re kinda wishing they got some of those fake memories cause that would make adjusting to a non apocalyptic world way easier

other notes -

i present a completely different vibe that you have never seen from me ever before! apocalyptic brat with a disgruntled found family father figure. how original, i know!!! anyways, here’s ellie williams, my favorite little demon child

insert the ‘i’ve had arlo for a day and a half’ meme cause that’s how i feel about ellie. even though i only know them from tlou show, i would die for them. how do you meet them and not want to commits multiple murders across state lines???? the ppl want to know joel.

gonna give a cliffnotes , look out of for spoilers im so sorry kldjfg

either way, ellie is a child born after the fall of the world as we knew it, she is raised within fedra’s QZ’s, and when she was a teenager, she went on a date with her best friend/**girlfriend** thank u , and then they were attacked. one of the infected came after them and bit both ellie and riley.

fast forward, ellie does not!! turn!!!!! how !!!!!! inquiring minds would love to know

but bestie is immune to the fungus, and is then brought into firefly custody, to be shipped to a lab across the country that they’ll be able to use her to help form a cure. enter joel

joel gets fucking thrown into being the delivery person for ellie, and highjinks ensue. aka, you have one hell of an emotional development of found family !!! it’s beautiful, it’s great, ellie and joel would both fucking die or kill for each other and they have on multiple occasions.

a lot of it comes down to the fact that joel with kill to get back to ellie, and ellie will kill to protect herself to find him again.

i could really sit here and give so many details about the two of them, about how ellie goes from being just cargo to being baby girl, but i really do not want to give it away. it’s just 9 episodes i will give you my hbo login pls go watch it

basically, this is my pun loving, sarcastic, every other word is a swear, heart of gold, but will absolutely choose her own, and joel’s survival above anyone else, child.

i am going to be taking my time getting their voice right, because i really do love this character, i want to do them justice when i am coming in on just a little bit of the media, so bare with me lkgdfjkg im also keeping out some more serious details about what happens to them for tw purposes.

also they have their shitty pun book here because i say so and im sad it seems like they lost it in their pack at the end of the season

connections :

✩ friends

pls they need friends, they are kinda rough around the edges and will pick a fight so easily but they really do just need a good group of friends to break past that

✩other apocalyptic besties

if anyone else has been through some kind of apocalypse and wants to trade stories, they got you

✩ coworkers

i’m considering them maybe working in an arcade, or music shop so if that’s something you can see your characters working at hmu

✩ potential ship

my love is a lesbian so just a heads up, but this would be based off of chemistry, mainly cause idk if i wanna go with canon ships gkldfjg i definitely would be willing to explore but that would be a super slowburn situation and i will probably be holding off on plotting it for a while.

#hw: intro #e. interactions #e. muse #e. memes #e. visage #e. event #e. texts #e. intro #spoilers tw #zombies tw

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whomst-art-thou-whomst-whomst · 3 years

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Texts from the Lost Tomb, part 5.4

I swear folks once I get this and the last part up I’m gonna condense it all

But yeah couldn’t resist some <3

Zhang and Wu Chat

Wu Xie: Um. I’m all done with the shower if you want a turn.

Zhang Qiling: I’m alright without one.

Wu Xie: sooo are you pissed at me still?

Zhang Qiling: ? I have not been angry with you since the ladder incident.

Wu Xie: you’ve barely said anything since the necklace thingy

Zhang Qiling: I believe it is a long-running joke amongst my friend group that I do not, in fact, say much.

Wu Xie: okay but there are multiple gouges in the tea house walls that would suggest you had somewhat strong feelings today

and I kinda caused the events that sparked said feelings

so just checking in you know

Zhang Qiling: I was not angry so much as I was afraid. More afraid than I’ve been in a long time.

Wu Xie: ??? But it has worked out fine??? Everyone made it out alive and Uncle Erbai gets to feel morally superior to the Zhang family for a while so today was a win overall

Zhang Qiling: I heard you scream. I didn’t know what had happened. I couldn’t get to you right away. Therefore, I was afraid.

Wu Xie: ohhhhh. oh, Xiao Ge. It’s alright now—hey the necklace was actually helping u look out for me:) It’s not like those ppl were actually trying to hurt me, really. Your family isn’t so bad, at least you don’t have any uncles you know of

today was just some big misunderstandings wrapped in some poor life choices. Tbh my memoir title

I feel kind of stupid for screaming but when a glowing necklace wraps itself around your neck it’s a little uhoh moment lol

I did like the design tho def my aesthetic.

Zhang Qiling: I am pleased that it was able to protect you when I was not.

Wu Xie: Uh no you are not allowed to get all emo abt this it’s only like 3pm

damn time flies when it’s flashing before your eyes lol

Are you on the roof? You’re def on the roof. I thought I heard the tiles moving over my head. Come down or I’m coming up.

Zhang Qiling: I will be down in a moment. Do not come outside, it’s cold and raining.

Wu Xie: you know, Zhang Rishan said he thinks the necklace might be linked to you, somehow

something from long ago, even though you wouldn’t remember it.

It’s lucky that it liked me, huh:)

Zhang Qiling: Yes. Quite lucky.

Babysitters Club Chat

Wang Pangzi: AWW LOOK AT HIM NAPPING ON YOUR SHOULDER SO CUTE. BEBES HAD A BIG DAY. YOU TWO ARE PRECIOUS. BE GOOD AND POSE FOR THE PICTURE NOW.

Zhang Qiling: No. Also, I am considering what steps I should take with Zhang Rishan. Regardless of his concern for the Zhang family line, his actions were unacceptable.

Wang Pangzi: HES DROOLING A LITTLE ON YOU WHICH IS LESS CUTE BUT I CAN CROP THAT PART

LOOK I KNOW YOURE STILL PISSED. IM NOT EXACTLY CALM MYSELF, I JUST HAVE WAYS TO SKIRT AROUND TIANZHENS BULLSHIT FILTER THAT YOU LACK

GET ON MY LEVEL

WU ERBAI WILL HANDLE IT, THINGS HAVE SETTLED I THINK

BUT ABOUT THAT NECKLACE

SO INTERESTING HMMM

Zhang Qiling: I am the patriarch of my family. The necklace behaved as I would, apparently, to protect a vulnerable family member. Wu Xie’s bad cold last week activated it, and it responded to a perceived danger to him today. Simple enough.

Wang Pangzi: UH HUH

A FAMILY MEMBER

THE NECKLACE REALLY SAID LOVE WINS

TOLKIEN COULD NEVER

Zhang Qiling: It protected him on a technicality. But I will not allow him to bear the burdens of my family ever again. It has taken so much from him already.

Wang Pangzi: YEAH SURE BLAH BLAH DESTINY BLAH BLAH ANGST

“A TECHNICALITY” WOW WHO SAID ROMANCE WAS DEAD

ANYHOO IM SCREENSHOTTING THIS FOR UR WEDDING RECEPTION SLIDESHOW

YA KNOW DURING MY SPEECH

Friends of Wu Xie Support Group Chat

Hei Yangjing: you’re welcome for everything today<3 I accept PayPal, although of course it is always my honor to assist my friends:)

Wang Pangzi: WE ARENT PAYING YOU SHIT

Zhang Qiling: You did absolutely nothing.

Hei Yangjing: whoa whoa maybe I wasn’t threatening family members or busting up load-bearing walls like some undying divas I could name but I totes helped

or at least I was there for moral support maybe?

Zhang Qiling: The only reason I knew you were there at all was that as I lowered my blade from Zhang Rishan’s neck, I heard the camera click and saw you were taking a selfie making a peace sign, angled to have the two of us in the background.

Xie Yuchen: I saw it on social media just now. The caption is “#greatdaycatchingupwiththelads #blessed”

Wang Pangzi: TBH KIND OF JEALOUS I DIDNT THINK TO DO THAT

Hei Hangjing: okay yeah you see Xiao Ge that is a modern kind of help I should’ve known you wouldn’t be aware

It’s called performance, you wouldn’t understand

it’s a ‘Gram thing

Also it means I’m a great person

Bc letting you handle the situation was my gift to you

Zhang Qiling: Wu Xie mentioned there is something called “blocking ppl” that gets them out of my phone.

Hei Yangjing: nah

Can’t trust that Wu Xie, bae can’t tell a coffin from an urn amirite

it’s not a thing, blocking

Xie Yuchen: It is a thing. I’ll show you later, Zhang Qiling.

Wang Pangzi: YOU BOYS GO GET CLEANED UP AND COME BY AROUND 9 I SNAGGED SOME OF ZHANG RISHANS BOOZE ON THE WAY OUT

Bonnie and Clyde Chat

Hei Yangjing: you looked pretty comfortable in those handcuffs earlier ;););)

Xie Yuchen: Go to sleep, idiot.

Hei Yangjing: You’d have to do something to tire me out ;););)

Xie Yuchen: Are you like this around Wu Xie? Not that I care, I’m just asking.

Hei Yangjing: uh that’s a big nope

First off all Idk when I’ll die but Id prefer it to be on my terms and not at the hands of those other two

Secondly there is a part of me that remembers how adorable he was when he was younger and that makes it weird

(No offense but u were not adorable. He was bebe luke skywalker, you were bebe princess leia I am obvs Han Solo 4lyfe)

Also I’m a little scared that if i flirted with him and he flirted back he’d be better at it.

Xie Yuchen: All valid concerns.

Hei Yangjing: as cute as he is I don’t really wanna tap that.

Xie Yuchen: I see.

Hei Yangjing: do you tho

Main Chat

Wu Xie: okay folks who wants cocoa to top the evening off? I picked some up today:D

Wang Pangzi: UH YOU SPENT YOUR DAY BEING KIDNAPPED AND PLACATING A SENTIENT NECKLACE WHEN DID YOU HAVE TIME TO GET GROCERIES

FRANKLY THATS INTIMIDATING

Wu Xie: the tea house gift shop:)

Wang Pangzi: …YOU BOUGHT COCOA FROM YOUR KIDNAPPERS. FROM THEIR GIFT SHOP. DURING YOUR KIDNAPPING.

WU XIE

WU XIE WHY

Wu Xie: I mean we were there the whole day, it felt impolite not to buy anything.

Wang Pangzi: OH RIGHT GREAT POINT ID HATE TO BE RUDE TO THEM AFTER THEY WENT TO THE TROUBLE OF ABDUCTING US

LISTEN WHEN PPL STEAL YOU IT BECOMES FREE REIGN ON THEIR SHIT

UGH YOU PROBABLY GOT A RECEIPT AND EVERYTHING

WAS UR LITTLE SHOPPING TRIP BEFORE OR AFTER THEY STUCK U IN A DUNGEON TO EXPERIMENT ON YOU

WAIT NVM I DONT WANT TO KNOW THE ANSWER TO THAT

Wu Xie: look, let’s focus on the positives/ we are all okay, and we learned something new, that necklace is still active! It’s really quite nice-looking when it isn’t moving of its own volition.

Wang Pangzi: YOU AND YOUR RELENTLESS DUCKING OPTIMISM

ZHANG QILING ARE YOU SEEING THIS

Zhang Qiling: I would love some cocoa. I’ll come to the kitchen.

Wu Xie: I have special marshmallows for you!!

Wang Pangzi: I SEE

WE ARE SUBSCRIBING TO THE PRESTIGIOUS “FUCK IT WHY NOT” SCHOOL OF THOT TONIGHT

LOL SURE LETS GO COCOA IT UP

IVE GOT SOMETHING STRONG TO POP IN IT

Wu Xie: Still thinking about that design… I’d love another chance to examine that necklace under less Zhangy circumstances.

Kinda sad we couldn’t borrow it to use for illnesses and dangerous missions :/

ah well it’s for the best, a family heirloom should be treasured, preserved and protected<3

Zhang Qiling: I put it on your dresser.

Wu Xie: ???????

Wang Pangzi: AND THATS WHY YOU AND I ARE FRIENDS, XIAOGE <3

Wu Xie: I—

Zhang Qiling: Are those bunny-shaped marshmallows for me?

#whomst #ultimate note #wu xie #dmbj #the lost tomb #pingxie #iron triangle #dmemebj

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lol-q · 3 years

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There’s so many things I love about the show that I haven’t seen people give enough credit for and I want to go on a little ramble because people are focusing so much on what they don’t like vs. what they do. So here’s my list. Sorry for the grammatical errors 😬

I love that the lesbian main character is this sweet, innocent, big hearted young woman and not portrayed as a overly sexual fuckboi that hits on every woman. I love that Fatou is soft and gentle. More lesbian rep like that please

I love the soundtrack. It’s exactly the type of stuff I imagine Fatou would listen to and it’s not just the top 100 hit songs.

I love that they use the soundtrack as a way to connect to the plot line, like the lyrics to the song Fatou was listening to when she was on the rooftop said “And I hate to leave you feeling all alone.But your story cannot start until you've grown. You can find how to be OK on your own. I just can't be the one that makes you feel at home” which was a hint as to where the plot was going

^^ also the song playing during Kieu My and Fatou’s museum date

I love the little mannerisms Nhungi chooses to show as Kieu My. The happy little bounce she did in ep 1 when she called out Fatou’s name and when she subtly checked Fatou out by looking her up and down.

I love how their rooms show their individual personality so well. Like Fatou’s room in the beginning of the season was normal and then it became increasingly messy as the episodes moved forward, showing her stress and chaos in her life

I love the height difference between Fatou and her brother lol

I love when her brother and her were thinking of what to get their parents so they split the bill on a gift - a very subtle way of showing siblings interacting

I love when Fatou and Ismail interact cuz it’s so funny

I love the physics teachers speaking voice, he sounds like kermit the frog

I love fatou’s eyebrows. Idk it’s just so perfect. Give me tips plz

I love that the characters rewear clothing. And it’s not a show where every episode is a new outfit with new clothes. Very realistic and it always bothered me when teens on highschool on tv have new clothes every episode

I love that Fatou’s original bio on tinder was “wanna cuddle?”. I feel like that girl would rather cuddle with someone than win the lottery. She’s so soft (also why did it say she was 24 in ep 2 when she was on tinder lol)

I love that the show showed the struggles of coming from a bilingual family and being the only one that struggles to speak it. When fatou was talking to her grandparents with her brother and her brother had to translate for her and it was awkward af, I felt that. I’m the youngest in my family and I struggle to speak Tagalog so people have to translate for me sometimes and it sucks.

^^ I relate to fatou so much in that scene cuz the dynamic in my family is the same as Fatou’s. My parents lay off and let me and my brother do our thing unless there’s an indication we need their help. The only time I ever spoke about school with my family was when report cards would come and they would see my grades weren’t that good. I remember my mom seeing I had a D in middle school and automatically jumping to conclusiosn without letting me speak. My brother is academically successful and he would also try and get me to do more school stuff when I was younger. Like he would make me do math problems to help with my grades. So it’s all very relatable for me

I love when Fatou sings, her voice is so soft and smooth.

I love whenever Kieu My and fatou are flirting both so blatantly and yet so subtly. Like the tension is there but it’s still awkward despite how smooth they both try to be it’s so adorable

I love how Fatou and Kieu My are so confident flirting and talking to eachother through texting but when it’s irl it’s still awkward and new. It shows the reality of an actual relationship in the making. It’s not just a full head dive into “I love you”.

I love when they were at the table tennis bar place and Fatou was hyping up Ava when there were dudes looking at them and Ava did a fancy ass turn and smile. She’s so pretty

I love that Fatou’s problems were shown in subtle ways in the beginning with money. Counting money at her job and when she wa trying to pay for the drink at the bar. It was a small interaction but in real life it would cause a lot of stress and anxiety if money counting problems kept happening over and over again

I love Yara and Josh’s friendship. More platonic friendship between a male and a female please. Also more Yara in general please.

I love that Zoe owned up to her actions last year to the entire group (minus Ismail Constantine and Kieu my) on New Years. I see her owning up to the role as Nora’s big sister.

I love when Josh was drinking a lot during New Years and Fatou was trying to get him to slow down. It shows how big her heart is for her friends. Also I think Josh and Fatou could be great friends

I love that Kieu My looks at Fatou like she hung the stars. When Fatou mentioned she knew Kieu My was a Scorpio, it’s the first time I’ve ever seen that girl smiled so big (before episode 5 of course)

I love that whenever they kiss Kieu my is smiling.

I love Sira’s side profile. There I said it. Girl has the jawline of a Greek goddess.

I love that they change Fatou’s hair. She looks good in every hair style but it’s always nice to see her in different styles.

I love that they showed the struggles of being a passive and gentle person. Because we’re not assertive in regular everyday life we are easily looked over. And it’s hard for us to muster the gusto to be assertive and take what we need because we prefer shying away from conflict and just letting things flow. I relate to fatou’s character so much in that sense. I lowkey think this is the universe’s way of telling me to stop being so passive about life and to take charge idk.

I love that the topic of white savior and performative activism was touched on. And I love that it was between two friends because it’s very realistic to how dynamics work between young people these days. The way they handle it differs in opinion but the fact that they even spoke about it was great.

I love that moment when Kieu My wrapped the vietnamese pancake in the lettuce snd handed it to Fatou. Its so sweet. If I was Fatou I would have forgiven her right then and there lol

I LOVE THE HEIGHT DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE TWo. YES MORE HEIGHT DIFFERENCE.

Episode 6. Just all of it. Even the angsty part. I want more of that. Episode 6 yes. I’ll marry episode 6

Kieu My wearing Fatou’s cardigan. 💕💕💕💕💕💕✨✨✨✨✨😫😫💕✨✨🥺

^^ but also as a person that tried bangs before, you can’t tell me that girl woke up with her bangs perfectly in place lol. This girl probably bought a mini straightener or something too

Fatou telling Kieu My it doesn’t matter if she wears make up or not rather than going off on how she looks prettier without it. She’s just like “it doesn’t matter. You’re pretty no matter what, my little space nerd”

Pissed off fatou is a hot fatou. Js

I love Sira’s acting in general. But the way she shows Fatou’s sadness is great. It’s not just tears and that’s it. When she got fired it was a build up of tears but she wasn’t sobbing, same thing with the cashqueens argument. But she broke when her and Kieu My got in a fight.

Finn being socially awkward. It’s so funny cuz Zoe is this bubbly party girl and her boyfriend is so awkward. Nice balance.

^^also his hair makes me laugh idk why

Ismail opening up to Fatou shows how so many people feel at ease with her. Girl has a calming presence for everybody, she doesn’t even realize how much she’s helped others.

I love that Constantine wears the same jacket over and over again. Idk it seems to fit his character.

^^also kudos to the actor who plays him, he’s doing an amazing job

Love Fatou. Love her dimples and her soft voice. She gets all high pitched when she’s normally speaking but when she was fighting with Kieu My her voice became lower. Just love the way Sira’s voice sounds. Also Nhungi’s speaking voice.

Love the shaky camera movements. The fast pans and the slow motion dance scenes.

Love the aesthetic of Kieu My smoking but PLEASE DONT SMOKE, CHILDREN. ITS BAD FOR YOU.

Love the different aesthetics of the cashqueens

Love maike. Great actress. Give this turtle an Oscar.

Love Kieu My climbing the roof to help her Fatou. Softie to her girlfriend but an ice queen to the world lol.

Love the actors. Love the characters. It just makes me so happy.

This is so well written, i might actually cry no but really it was really nice to read your positive and cuteee facts after the tag check :/ and it really helped because i get mad and sad when i see bad takes. Everything you said was so true and i think im fangirling over this essay. And it made me emotional 👉👈. Represantation does really matter.

This season is so important for so many people and i don’t think some people realize that when they’re ‘’criticizing’’ some things. Not only we have a lesbian main, we have a black lesbian main who is the softest person in the world and she has LD and/or ADHD. I sometimes can’t believe we got to the point of skamverse where we get rep instead of hurtful,problematic seasons and plots, some might interpret that as shade but it really isn’t, careless storylines really does hurt ppl and why would you want to hurt people when you can give 8 min of sapphic museum date instead 👭🌌 :)

i love this season, i love this gen and i love this essay

#no but i could go one by one and talk about everything you numbered #but im not gonna for the sake of other ppl #because everyone hates long post #people were really so cute in my asks today instead of defending constantin so that was nice👍#i do the others later #but this was so cute stopppp #shut up about my grammer!!#do not talk about my grammer #druck #ask

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vexedtonightmares · 3 years

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hey :) do you mind sharing some more about the skam austin panel today?

yeah for sure!! i’ll put what i remember under the keep reading tab for ppl who wanna hear about it :) i only went to the panel, not the rewatch (bc money lmao) so there are probably some other things they talked about that i missed, but i’m sure there are other ppl on here that can fill you in on any gaps that i miss!

it was valeria (jo), julie (megan), and lakeisha* (shay), and pedro (p jo) on the panel (he was the moderator, the other three did most of the talking), though they did mention other castmates throughout :,)

*lakeisha was the name they went by on the panel, and in the info before the panel it said they use they/them pronouns, so that’s how i’ll be referring to them throughout this

all of them started out by talking about what they’re doing currently, julie said she’s dropping out of school because her therapist told her “you as a person matters more than you as a student” which i thought was a great sentiment as well

lakeisha said they’ve been making a lot of clothes and music (also throughout the whole thing they kept showing us their shoes and they left to pee like halfway through something they were answering one time hfjskaj)

they then talked about their audition processes (val had the most chaotic series of audtions omg i would love to see her audition tapes)

val originally read for either jo or megan, and she had literally just moved there like right before casting and almost didn’t go to her audition

she said that she decided to be the loudest person in the room so that they couldn’t ignore her, and that carried her through most of the rounds of auditioning

she said that at the end she said “if you don’t choose me, which you should choose me, but if you don’t, please choose another latinx actress because you have no idea how much it means to see someone who looks like you on screen”

julie auditioned because she was hoping julie (andem) would bring lisa and tarjei and she basically wanted a free meet and greet djkfshk

she found out about skam og on tumblr !! she’s one of us 😌

she thinks julie andem is the coolest person in the world

they told her that she was pretty much everything they envisioned megan to be, so they cast her fairly early on and then had her partner with the marlon prospects

giovanni, who eventually played tyler, auditioned for marlon and they kissed during their audition even though they weren’t supposed to

julie went to high school with till who ended up playing marlon and people would always ask her what it was like to get to make out with him and she was just like .... we just working bruh

lakeisha found the ad to audition on instagram and decided why not because it said it was a paid job

they looked up a bunch of improv games the night before because they had no experience and had no idea what they were doing

in the audition julie asked what the tattoos on their hand meant (and also the one thing lakeisha was excited about being out of contract was that they could get as many tattoos as they wanted without asking for permission)

they all had a lot of love for julie andem and loved working with her

val said that she’d always try to make julie laugh and she said that julie is the reason og and austin are so good, because it’s her story and her vision

they roasted the shit out of fb too (as they should)

basically fb ghosted them and never renewed the show but also never cancelled it so technically they don’t even know if anyone else could get the rights to reboot the show somewhere else (lakeisha said ‘skam austin onlyfans’ lmao)

i don’t remember which one of them said it but they said fb is like an inconsistent dad lollll

they also think that fb sort of finessed julie/her team because they were under the impression that it would be like og where they had their own website for the show and everything, but then it ended up just being a facebook page

they also filmed promo for season 1 that never ended up being used but they don’t know why

lakeisha felt super disrespected by the fact that not only did they not get their season, but also the fact that they just dropped the show like it was nothing and none of them even found out that they probably weren’t getting more seasons until they saw that their instagram accounts were gone

everyone was upset about the igs getting deleted too because they put so much work into the content on there for it all to just disappear

val said “no one tells a story like the one that was about to be told” and everyone agreed

val said that if the show would have continued, jo would have been undocumented and they would have shown her trying to navigate college (not only were we robbed of a jo season, we were robbed of college seasons 😤)

jo x jo were definitely going to be a thing

val said that when they wrapped s2 she was like finally!!! because now they could get into the stories that they really wanted to tell and really knew would make a difference (everyone vehemently agreed)

they were proud of the fact that they’re the most diverse cast and that they don’t just treat the characters of color like sidekicks like the other remakes do

julie talked about how skam france was the only remake to have jonas not accept isak right away when he was coming out and how it was suspicious that he happened to be the only non white jonas and that was the choice they made

val said that druck is the only remake she’s watched but she likes it

they also talked about how, even though it’s great that the cast was so diverse, practically everyone behind the scenes was white

val said that she didn’t really think about it much at the time because she found it hard to speak up since she was very young and inexperienced but looking back she wishes jo’s body wasn’t so fetishized as a latina (she didn’t clarify whether she was talking on a production level or within the fandom, but she talked about costuming so i assumed she meant more on a production level)

they all wished there was more representation off screen as well as on

shay x megan was brought up and julie said that shay was going to have her own love interest (am!even !!!!) come season three, and that it wouldn’t have been megan

she also said that megan was mostly just confused and like ‘haha i kiss girls when i’m drunk’ but then she also said that megan and shay never had feelings for each other at the same time so 👀

she was upset that they made megan and marlon get back together at the end of season 2 because she wasn’t a fan of them together, but she said it also makes sense because a lot of teen girls go back to their toxic exes even when they know it’s not good for them

lakeisha said that they hated shay’s acrylic nails because it didn’t make sense to them for her to have them (especially since shay was a musician)

they also said that they’ve been pretty confident and open with their sexuality since they were around 12, and that one time in middle school they dated a boy because he had an xbox and then they were like oh no is this toxic am i using him because he actually has feelings for me?? hdskafja

they also said that the cfgc music happened because they heard that the boys from og also had a song and at first i was like wtf are they talking about but now i think they meant the penetrator song 💀💀

julie has a cfgc shirt :,) and they all stole a bunch of clothes and stuff from set, val said she took a bunch of outfits that jo never wore which makes her sad to think about now

val’s favorite scene to film was the car scene in s1 before the party (she said it was one of the best moments of her life) and julie said she liked that one as well (val said there’s a shot of her looking into the camera and flipping it off but they didn’t include it in the show, i feel robbed)

people asked how it felt for lakeisha to be the first lesbian isak and they said that they didn’t feel like they were, because they didn’t really get the chance :(( but they also said that the idea itself was very intimidating and there was a lot of pressure around it

they also said that they and gio were very very close both on screen and off, they said it wasn’t even like they were an extension of one person, that’s how close they got

there were a lot of improvised scenes, particularly with val, and she also said that incorporating spanish into jo’s dialogue was mostly improvised

julie, val, and pedro also all talked about how they’re all mexican, and how each of their life experiences vary so much from one another, on the show and off and julie said megan’s upbringing was a lot like hers

they all also said that they liked the music the show used and a lot of them have emotional attachments to a lot of the songs

val said she wishes they used more frank ocean and i agree

they also said they’re not sure if there are bloopers or anything, but they’d love to see them if there are

i’m trying to think of anything i missed ahhh i feel like they talked about so much but i think i’ve got the key points soooo

that’s all !!! hope this was interesting to ppl who still care about austin like i do :,))

#skam austin #asks

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musashi · 3 years

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sending u this ask as an opportunity for u to talk to me abt fi!! i love ur thoughts n words on things nd i don't send asks as much bc i don't have. good words to talk to u abt stuff but i rlly enjoy just. ur Passion nd stuff. autistic people r the best at talking abt stuff i stand by that we r just Epic. anyways if u wanna, i'd love to hear more about just... how fi sorta. changes, over the game? like the Little Things that show her starting 2 care abt link more, or becoming more "human"!

i love this whole ask. you’re right autistic folks r sexy as hell idk how the divine powers that be fit so much passion into my tiny body but i’m glad they made the attempt.

ANYWAYS FI. i don’t think i’ve ever actually laid this out because for the most part it is incredibly subtle and requires a lot of filling in gaps yourself, and i think that someone who cares less abt her can probably come away from it with an entirely different interpretation. fi’s development of actual feelings are a very sudden a mysterious thing, and i have a LOT of thoughts about them going in a lot of different directions so forgive me if this answer isn’t particularly linear or coherent. i’m not just gonna talk about her slow burn into feeling things, i’m also gonna talk about... why i think it happens.

we don’t get to learn a lot about sword spirits and how they come into being, other than it takes great power to enchant a sword with a spirit/temper a sword with one inside it. hylia obviously created fi and, presumably, demise created ghirahim, and they are pretty much as opposite as two people can be with their only real characteristic in common being precision, intelligence & otherworldly loyalty to their respective masters.

we thus don’t get to learn how much control the creator of a sword spirit has over what kind of spirit comes of it, if their personalities are organic to their experiences or crafted from the moment they awaken. what i mean by this is like... ghirahim could have been a cold, calculating AI like fi when he was first tempered and gained his dramatics over time, we have no idea how long he’s been alive in comparison to her, if his personality is so much more extroverted because he was allowed a life outside his blade whereas fi was isolated in hers for millennia. or if he just came into creation immediately ready to scream and stick his tongue in ppl’s ears.

i swear to god i’m going somewhere with this. ok. anyways.

fi in the beginning of skyward sword is, i think, how most people remember her--data-interested, icy, and detached. there is a reverence in how she addresses link from the start, even before he formally becomes her wielder, but beyond that she is calculating and precise and rarely wastes words. all of this kinda paints a picture of hylia creating fi, to me--breathing life into the spirit and willing her to be effective, be efficient, be loyal, and be sharp. when you have that image in your head, a lot of how fi operates makes sense--she wasn’t created to have emotions, because emotions get in the way of what her purpose is. hylia made a weapon and a servant, not a friend. it sucks to think about, but that is fi’s purpose.

the game is very careful, however, to show you it’s not that simple from the beginning. because hidden in Ice Queen Fi’s introduction is... a surprising amount of personality.

like this shit, where she straightup just dunks gaepora in the trash because his #Lore is out of date. it’s hysterical because you really do not know if she’s just a) an AI who doesn’t understand when she’s being kinda Rude or b) being snarky On Purpose. and that ambiguity in itself crafts this beautiful air of mystery where you, from the get go, don’t entirely know what to expect of fi all the time.

or this, which she says directly after link hesitates to accept the blade:

this scene, which people who have edgier takes on fi constantly use to paint her as intentionally manipulative, where all i see is... her using emotional validation to calm link down enough for him to take in what’s happening. a really important thing about fi is that she’s paradoxically an empath? she can read auras and detect emotion with extreme precision even if she’s incapable of feeling it herself in the beginning. so she knows everything link is experiencing here, understands that it’s holding him back, and takes care to deconstruct the whirlwind of emotion he’s collapsing under and explain to him why he can and should trust her words.

again this is all in her introductory scene. they write her very specifically to be a seemingly flat character with this... rumbling of something more going on under the surface. so much so that the first time you get to a sacred spring and fi, completely randomly, just starts skating across the water’s surface and speaking ancient poeticisms to you, you don’t question it. you’re not like hey, why is sword alexa doing a little dance? you just accept it as something fi is doing, because fi always feels like she’s at her job, and you don’t know how she acts outside of work, but you kinda feel like maybe you want to.

fi’s affinity for music is another way they insert humanity into an AI without making you think too hard about it. singing and dancing are inherently human, artforms are something we associate with the heart and soul. even teaching a robot to paint is, in itself, an art project crafted by a human hand. but you don’t really... consciously think about that, when you watch her do these things. you just kind of accept that she is this otherworldly thing guiding you. you don’t think about the contrast of this programmed assistant performing music alongside you in a sacred ritual. you’re just kind of like, yeah? i can’t JUST play nayru’s wisdom on my harp, i need someone who can sing and god put a vocaloid in my sword???

throughout the game, fi’s dialogue chains when you summon her don’t change in any meaningful way (besides based on what you’re carrying, where you are, etc) but as you near the end, there are a couple things of note. one that sticks out to me is what she says about one of the mid-game minibosses, who is also an artificial intelligence--

a lot of people laugh abt this line and make jokes about fi being hot for the tall handsome robot pirate and they’re valid. but the thing is, like, from the beginning of her mission, fi knew she’d essentially be dying once the world was saved. and early game fi has no hesitations about her part in things regardless, because, as we know, she wasn’t created to feel things like that. she wasn’t created to fear death, to grow attached to life or anyone in it, or to experience sorrow at the idea of saying goodbye. but this is mid-game fi, who still... never says anything she doesn’t deem entirely necessary, but she says this. for no discernible reason, she says this. it’s an unskippable dialogue option, one they WANT you to see and one that is different when you know where she ends up. admiration is already something you wouldn’t really expect of her, but it’s more than that--she’s longing for her own story to mirror it. by the sand sea, fi has started to realize she doesn’t want to go to sleep.

it’s another one of those moments where you’re kinda like, ‘haha, what, fi?' and then move on. another one of those moments where she kinda does something a little unexpected, but not so unexpected you question it too hard. fi excels at those.

before you go off to fight demise, fi stops you to warn you that it is the final battle, and you cannot return. and when you tell her you’re ready, she says this:

as i’ve said, fi doesn’t waste words. almost always, everything she says is for the purpose of efficiency, and rarely does she offer thoughts without fixed probabilities and ultimate endgoals in mind.

this is a sentiment.

it serves no purpose. it is purely an expression of devotion.

and because of EVERYTHING i’ve mentioned thus far, this line both hits you HARD as significant and foreboding in how suddenly tender it is, AND manages to read as in-character for her to say. because the way they write fi’s humanity is so beneath the surface, so easily missable, so hard for me to even lay out with concrete evidence despite the fact that i’m a person who reads a text dump of all her dialogue before bed every night.

but to me, what lays out fi’s inner workings best is actually her actual goodbye, and... not the moment most people would think, tbh? it’s not her tender farewell that speaks her emotions loudest to me, but the moment right before:

these lines, which would read as perfectly in character if it were early game fi, cut you. her complete and utter flippancy, the way she talks about all you’ve been through together as though it were nothing to her, the absolute coldness here after everything. you as a player feel kind of pathetic when she says this, like you were misguided in growing attached to her and thinking of her as a friend. and you KNOW thats the intended effect, because this is what link looks like:

he takes a moment in that last shot to like. swallow sadness and turn away from her, but even as he’s turning his head, he doesn’t take his eyes off her until the last possible moment. she hurts his feelings! why.

because it’s an act, is why. of COURSE fi loves him. of course she’s grown attached to him, of course she’s happy to have known him, of COURSE they’re friends. but fi was NEVER supposed to feel that way, she was never supposed to have the capability to love, and there’s no calculation she can run to set the uncertainties of that at ease within herself. so those lines up above is her trying her best to reset herself to who she was in the beginning, to snap herself back into the role of an emotionless servant to the goddess, to convince herself--not link--that saying goodbye won’t hurt. she’s trying to cope with something she has no idea was in the cards for her, and that’s why she’s seemingly so cruel for a moment.

all of this becomes apparent when she calls him back moments later and tells him how she really feels. there’s major whiplash because fi herself is Going Thru It. but essentially what’s happening in that moment is she thinks she knows what will hurt the least, but she miscalculates and backpedals and realizes even if saying goodbye hurts, it hurts less than pretending she doesn’t want to.

i think a lot of people overlook that line--“the most precious data i have on record.” fi, who contains multitudes within her. who contains knowledge immeasurable, the thoughts and feelings and stories of thousands. of civilizations, of gods, of countless ages passed. everything she holds within her is dwarfed entirely by what she feels for link, beside link. nothing in her encyclopedic knowledge can even compare to her friendship with him in the significance it has to her. like all things, fi has her own way of communicating her meanings, and this is her way of saying she really, truly loves him.

in addition, she very carefully does this after he abandons the sword, so it’s clear that it’s of her own will, not a part of her purpose as his servant. for this whole cutscene, up until she end, she drops the honourific and calls him just Link.

and while i see a lot of people debate if she truly does ‘feel,’ anything, like... she says it right here, she does. whether or not she was able to feel from the beginning or not, she can feel now. she has trouble putting words to those feelings, or explaining to herself and others where on earth they came from... but she feels now. that cannot be disputed.

happiness that she was able to know him. loyalty she wants to transcend lifetimes. sorrow at the idea of them having to part. gratitude that he took the chance, and did so beside her.

let’s talk about gratitude.

in skyward sword, gratitude is a tangible source of magic. it opposes malice, which as of botw is a reoccurring thing in zelda lore. skyward sword has two items--evil crystals and gratitude crystals--that represent malice and gratitude respectively. while the first isn’t entirely relevant, the second is something you’re actively encouraged to more or less harvest by helping people and basking in their thanks toward you. these feelings of gratitude are so canonically powerful in the zelda universe that they can turn monsters into humans entirely, and the outpouring of energy that event causes makes every monster & hostile creature within all of skyloft turn docile at once.

according to batreaux, the monster in question, this is well-established legend, the idea of gratitude granting humanity to the nonhuman. skyward sword literally said the power of love was canon.

the song that plays over the goodbye, of course, is called fi’s gratitude.

this is just one theory i have on the matter, but... whether hylia intended or foresaw fi to be capable of feeling human emotion or not, i do believe it was gratitude that woke her heart up. whether she was meant to love or not, link’s spirit contained within it enough love for the both of them, enough to touch her soul and rouse her from her cold and emotionless state. as always, through everything, they work in perfect tandem--his passionate heart touches hers as it sleeps, her wisdom holds him steady and level-headed.

when fi says “may we meet again in another life,” she says it like a prayer, because it is one--she knows hylia, knows that hylia loved link’s spirit just as she did, and knows that hylia of all people understands what the sword spirit is going through. and fi also knows that hylia immortalizes those she loves with cycles, with reincarnation, eternal life without the pain of never dying. fi doesn’t have a soul that hylia can bring back from death nor a physical body to revive, but she works with what she can--and so long as link’s spirit breathes anew, he finds fi. in a sunlit grove, with light bearing down on her, safe and warm and always loyal, even as the world rages on outside. fidelis, she was named for--“faithful.”

the fandom doesn’t really talk abt it, but fi is an angel. she’s an angel god sent to watch over one human, and when god said your mission is complete fi faced god and walked backwards into hell. her divine mission is long passed, but it stopped being about what she was fated to do long ago.

fi began to watch over link because he was her master. and fi resolved to stay forever because he was link.

#skyward sword #long post #hand of sorrow #wendy rambles #Anonymous #wendy answers

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sobdasha · 3 years

Text

i’ve been rereading a lot of my favorite stuff for months now

since I'm lacking in spoons for library trips

And when I was cottoning on to the fact that I have, in fact, been autistic all along, one of the things I realized is that the connecting thread between the kinds of stories and kinds of characters that I like is in fact that they display autistic or autistic-adjacent traits. I had realized this, come up with a lot of examples. I knew this.

Haha yeah as I'm actually rereading the things the evidence is damning that I did not come even close to understanding the full depth of it.

~ Taucris Ithesta is Autistic and Other Adjacent Things re: Leckie's Novels ~

Actually let's start with The Raven Tower because you can't actually argue with me about autistic Siat.

Siat actively avoids eye contact, is """shy""", speaks too softly, has an excellent grasp of humor, likes rocks as a special interest, likes to collect rocks, likes to sort rocks, likes to line up rocks, has one (1) bff to conduct social interactions for her, notices patterns, is good at learning, and is considered disabled by society's standards.

Ughhhhh all that talk about rocks makes me sad all over again that I pitched my rock collection when I moved out (I saved the best fossils, though).

(ETA: I have since bought more rocks because polished gemstones with carvings on them make for great stims, I am very pleased with me)

Okay so now that that's been established, let's talk about Strength and Patience of the Hill.

Because this rock gets me. Originally I figured it was probably, y'know, like with Ancillary Justice Leckie's given me an ace-aro main character and I can identify with that as an ace-aro. But unlike Breq, who very much loves people and wants to take care of them and found family etc, Strength and Patience of the Hill doesn't give much of a shit about people. With some exceptions of people that are it's people, how dare you mess with them, Strength and Patience of the Hill will kick your ass. Although even then I'm not sure Strength and Patience is all that great at taking care of people. Also Strength and Patience of the Hill is very much absorbed in its own selfishness, very much consumed with his own internal world, and I am also a jerk like that so it was very relatable.

(Yes I am using multiple pronouns because one of my many favorite parts of the book signing was watching everyone scramble over pronouns for a rock because "It never came up so I never figured it out" and I'm pretty sure Strength and Patience doesn't even use pronouns because why would you need a gendered pronoun to refer to yourself??? You don't even need a name to refer to yourself, actually I'm pretty sure Strength and Patience doesn't actually consider itself to have a name.)

So it made sense that this rock just really gets me. I know it's bad when the majority of representation for ace-aro characters is stereotypical robots or rocks or aliens (oooh or sentient space rocks wait wAIT now that I've said that I've just realized the Myriad is the definition of a Crystal Gem, pffft) or whatever but honestly I don't care because I just really identify with the robots??? So I really liked it, YMMV.

(It's probably also bad if the trend for autistically-coded characters is just stereotypical robots or rocks or aliens or whatever too but like honestly a big autistic #mood is feeling like you are a robot or an alien or whatever so maybe that's why I'm not offended???)

My point being that Strength and Patience of the Hill displays a lot of autistic traits and is therefore very relatable, in this Ted Talk I will.

Strength and Patience of the Hill processes things slowly. She will come up with the perfect retort and tell you 5 years later with absolutely no context.

It loves daydreaming, staring at things, noticing patterns, and enjoying quiet and solitude. It loves thinking about why things are the way they are. Look I have fantasized about what if I could exist as just a pair of eyeballs and a mind floating around in space, observing things, thinking things, and not having to actually interact with the world, and I'm pretty sure this rock is living that life. (Until y'know it gets told life doesn't work like that.)

Despite his slow processing speed, and taking a while to learn language, Strength and Patience of the Hill is good at learning things, and I feel like it's the kind of sort-of-sideways, context-based accumulation of knowledge that I learn through as well.

Strength and Patience of the Hill has one (1) friend, and through the Myriad it benefits from the fact that the Myriad has an actual social circle, without having to put forth any effort of maintaining friends on its own, which is 100% the way to do it.

Strength and Patience of the Hill tends to attract the other "quirky" kids--that is, my impression is that the people who become his priests tend to be those people who look at the world a little differently, those people on the fringes. Trans people, autistic people, people with other disabilities.

Strength and Patience of the Hill trying to explain the state of affairs in Vastai to Eolo: "Okay so my first memory I can recall is…" No, okay, no, I know, it's just literally how the narrative has to be told, I'm not criticizing, but that doesn't make it any less reminiscent of "autistic person trying to explain a simple thing but starts in with 10 pages of context first to ensure the over-explanation makes sense" (haha that's why I consistently got stuck training endless new hires, I'm literally so bad at it that I'm the best in the department and I hate life).

Difficulty understanding other's feelings/points of view/circumstances (I know it's because he's a rock and a god but that doesn't make it any less relatable), hmmm what else…

Oh right, a typical interaction with Strength and Patience of the Hill:

Person: (gives offering) Strength and Patience: (offering is accepted because the transaction literally occurred, no need to respond) Person: "(asks petition)" Strength and Patience: ... Strength and Patience: wait Strength and Patience: what Strength and Patience: wait was I supposed to do something else Strength and Patience: did you ask something of me? Strength and Patience: I don't understand what you asked????? Strength and Patience: it's been an entire year now it's too awkward Strength and Patience: i'm sure it's. Fine. Strength and Patience: It's fine. (rinse and repeat)

Like I said, this rock gets me.

(Haha I was reading through my notes from the book signing and I found "Strength + Patience doesn't give a shit about balance, Strength + Patience is just selfish, which it manifests as apathy, which is why this rock gets me. All of my best interpersonal traits also spring from not giving a fuck and waiting ppl to go away faster lol" and why is that, oh because ~I'm~ ~autistic~ pfffft)

I started this post a while ago and this was as far as I got and I don't remember if I had more??? Time to talk about Taucris probably!!!

(I'm skipping Ancillary Justice etc for now because I do want to make a post about that but like there's just. So much. In those books. It's masking all the way down. So it can be its own post. One day.)

Because I waited so long I forgot what I was going to write so I'll just grab the book and flip through and comment as I see things.

To start off with: Taucris and adulthood. I've seen other people pick up primarily on the gender aspect of it--that Taucris waited until almost 25 to take her adult name because she she never figured out what her gender was (non- uhhhhhh what's the word for binary when it's three and not two? Non-tri-something Taucris in a society with 3 options but all 3 options are gendered? I'll go with that.) What really resonated for me was that Taucris waited until almost 25 to take her adult name because she never felt like an adult. And I get that ~everyone feels that way~ but I feel like it's Different for Taucris in the same way it's Different for me. Anyway I feel like no matter which aspect you choose, it's probably an autistic vibe.

Also Taucris seems to have a bit of a flat affect? She seems very serious (both in body language and in speech), and kind of intense sometimes when she talks, and Ingray notes how Taucris usually doesn't smile (she smiles with Ingray because Ingray makes her comfortable) and has always been """shy""".

Also Taucris...talks strangely? I am not sure exactly how to explain it. It's not written badly or anything, it's...you know how sometimes you suddenly sit back and look at dialogue and go no one speaks like this and it throws you out of the story because you dropped your suspension of disbelief? Taucris kind of gives me that feeling, and only Taucris. Almost like her speech is a little bit stilted? Awkward? She's very serious and matter of fact and says things like "You've always been so kind to me" with a straight face. But it doesn't feel like a """bad writing""" (quotation marks for subjectivity) thing. But I notice it every time I read her dialogue… I think it's just that Taucris is autistic and awkward and that's how she speaks. Also I think she's adorable.

Police work is Taucris' special interest. So much so that that's the entire reason she became an adult, so she could engage in her special interest better. She's ~weird~ for her single-minded interest and her interest in a job below her ~status~ and she doesn't care, she set her heart on this anyway, volunteering and interning so on.

Oh that was something else I was going to talk about--Taucris mentions feeling like she doesn't have her shit together, not like Ingray (who also doesn't feel she has her shit together. Kind of like "no one really feels like an adult). But Taucris seems quite calm and capable in Planetary Security. I don't know if this is just masking, but...I really hope that she does feel that way in her job. That because it's her special interest, that helps balance out the stress of being alive and simultaneously employed full-time. That because she's been volunteering and interning here so long, she's been familiar with the office and it wasn't a stressful transition. That she acts confident because she feels competent and respected. Taucris may look calm and cool and collected on the outside and be screaming on the inside but I hope she actually feels pretty good on the inside too.

I would also like to say that I like Taucris' nother. Despite what Danach implies, I get the picture from Taucris that e is supportive of Taucris' personality and interests even when e doesn't get it. E indulged her interest in police work, e didn't understand why Taucris wasn't taking an adult name but tried to be patient about it...so I assume that also means that e was understanding of all of Taucris quirks and stims and particularities. E's been a good support system while Taucris' peers have not.

(Except for Ingray, Taucris' one (1) friend.)

I like Taucris' relationship with Deputy Chief Veret too--the way Taucris quietly manages breakfast so e doesn't have to think about it or be put out (this is The Love Language to me, not being inconvenienced, and I feel that this is part of my personality because my personality is autistic, so). I don't know why specifically Taucris does this, but all the reasons I could come up with feel very wholesome. Taucris respects Veret as her boss and as a person. Taucris is empathetic and thoughtful (she doesn't like Danach but she tries to consider and understand where he's coming from; Taucris isn't Hatli but she considers Veret's fasting etc to be valid rather than a choice of superstition). Taucris' situation is different but she knows that it doesn't feel good to be treated as weird, to be sneered at because you don't act the way people expect you to. Taucris, being autistic, maybe has a lot of experience with "perfectly good foods" she won't eat. Taucris strikes me as someone who observes quietly, and considers carefully, and maybe takes a long time to make up her mind but when she moves it's deliberately and not carelessly. Which is, to me, a masking trait.

In the quantum version of this post I was going to write everything so polished and lay out my points so nicely but clearly that didn't happen and I don't know where to end this and I'm sure I didn't even explain things that well so I'll just say, I feel it was very autistic of Taucris in the last chapter to just be like "well IDK what you want from me and rather than expending massive effort trying to suss it out and guessing wrong I'll just be direct: I know you can't talk about what happened so I won't ask you about what happened unless you want me to ask you about what happened in which case you should say so and I will ask but I think maybe you just need to watch a movie with me instead."

#sobdasha fic adjacent #al provenance #the raven tower #HAPPY AUTISM MONTH #look i actually did a thing while it was still april #all my faves are autistic #also is this not showing up in the tags as punishment for my sins or like can I not see it because dumblr

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mha-adore · 3 years

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hey! ty sm for doing the matchup exchange with me, i look forward to writing your match! i’m rita and i go by she/her pronouns. i have a preference for men & i’m 16. my quirk would be similar to shinso & inumaki from jjk,, i can control ppl and animals just by saying a command,,, an indicator for when i’m using my quirk would be my eyes changing color & a side effect to using my quirk would be getting light headed.

i’m a libra sun, aquarius moon, & leo rising. a slytherin & intj-t. i’m v polite and reserved when you first meet me. i’m pretty introverted and i have anxiety. it takes me while to open up since it takes me a while to trust ppl. i do tend to get annoyed and angry by others easily,, i’m a bit of a hot head. i’m pretty chill and like joking around once i open up,, i can also be kinda dumb. i’m a bit of a loner and i don’t have many friends. i’m actually a bit of an emotional person but only when it comes to shows, movies, books, etc,, i tend to keep my emotions bottled up. i’m self conscious and self critical. i care a lot about having perfect grades and getting into a good university but i’m so lazy (lots of breaks & procrastination) at the same time,, i end up getting everything done on time though. i’m impatient when it comes to my own things so i like doing things my way bc i feel more comfortable that way. i also like keeping things neat. i’ve also been told i have a resting sad face & that i’m intimidating. i wear a lot of black and i’d describe my style as dark academia mixed with 70s-90s fashion. when i’m at home i just wear comfortable clothing like pajama pants and a t-shirt.

my likes/hobbies/interests are baking, playing the sims, writing, and playing board games with ppl i’m close to. i also like relaxing in bed and spending time with people i’m close to and having fun. i’m interested in psychology, true crime, & history. i don’t like arrogant & closed minded people. i look for a partner who is loyal, kind, & open-minded. my love languages are gifts and quality time (both ways).

i hope this isn’t too much,, ty again! <3

Hey friend, it's my pleasure! Thanks sm for offering 💖

Can I just say super quick that your quirk is really cool? You could command an army of bears, raccoons or fire ants. I would be terrified. Also I'm an Aquarius moon and INTJ too, air moons gotta stay together. I totally got a Libra vibe off you when you first messaged me and you're super sweet 🎀 also I totally get you on the anxiety part, I have anxiety too. I know how terrifying it can be to reach out to new people so please know I'm proud of you for taking the chance to reach out to me 😊 and it's never too much; the more detail the better!

I match you with Shoto!

Say hi to the walking AC and heater unit. A couple reasons I picked him is because you mentioned having anxiety and being hot headed. With his father being, well, himself and his mother being the anxious person she is, Shoto understands both sides of the coin very well and knows how to deal with both parts. He can balance being calm and stern at the same time and he has the patience of a saint. He would give you the time and space you need to grow comfortable around new people and surroundings, as well he would be able to keep you grounded when your temper gets the best of you. He mellows you out. My personal headcanon is that he's a Capricorn sun, Scorpio moon, Virgo rising, Ravenclaw and INFP.

He returns your jokes with dry humor. He can keep a dead serious face while making the stupidest jokes too. He could look you dead in the eye, face straight, and rip a monster fart and not giggle just to see your reaction. Honestly the image of him holding eye contact while aggressively farting is funny in my head. I know I have the humor of a 9 year old.

He isn't bothered by you not having many friends. He's a private person and doesn't want a lot of people up in his business. He prefers few close friends over many distant friends. He knows you aren't stupid and pays no attention to anything you say that may sound dumb. He's heard so much dumb shit he learned to filter it from his brain.

He understands that you're closed off on your emotions. He really can't blame you, he's quite the same. If you get a little teary eyed over a book or movie he'll let you talk it out and cry if you'd like, but he won't push you to be uncomfortably open to him. He values your happiness over his own and doesn't mind you keeping your feelings to yourself. He respects your privacy. Regardless of what you may feel conscious or critical of about yourself he's there to remind you that you're perfect. You're healthy, you're strong and you're doing the best you can. No one could ask any more from you. He's lived a majority of his life feeling outcasted and ignored because of his scar and wouldn't wish the same on anyone, so if there's any part of you that you feel bad about he's always reminding you that you have no imperfections, everything about you makes you one of a kind. You're irreplicable.

He isn't worried about you procrastinating on studying or homework. As long as you get it done and do well enough he isn't concerned. If you ever have difficulty with a subject he's happy to help you study and learn. If you want he can ask Momo to join for a study party if you want the extra help or company. He just wants to see you succeed and get into the college of your cotton candy dreams. Oh and don't worry about your tuition, he has it covered. Don't even mention it to him it'll already be paid off, including books and living arrangements. He only wants you to pay him back by doing your best in school and showing him you can handle the hard work.

He always has a suggestion on ways you can do things but he knows you prefer to do them by yourself, so he'll neber bombard you with his ideas. If you ask for his input he has plenty to give but otherwise he gives you the room to make your own moves. He's a neat freak himself and is always happy to help you keep your room clean and well put together. He has good room decor ideas too if you want to spruce up your room.

He really doesn't see you as intimidating. He sees a confident, independent and strong young woman who can hold her own. He occasionally wonders if you're really sad or if that's just your expression and he'll occasionally ask. He's only making sure you're okay. If you're sad he's on it with a cute or funny movie, some snacks, a shoulder to cry on and a whole night's worth of stuff to talk about.

He likes your sense of fashion, he enjoys darker and warmer colors. He lives for the 80s aesthetic and loves to see you mix the two so effortlessly. He can, wants to and will give you his t shirts to wear at home. He'll also loan you hoodies and sweaters. He won't outright buy you a hoodie, he'll buy one for himself and let you get away with stealing it from him.

He's so soft for home made cookies and would love for you to make him some. Home made dinners are also great. He would love to help you bake and would enjoy baking dates. He'll also watch shows like Hell's Kitchen with you. He isn't exactly a huge gamer but he likes simulation games and RPGs like Sims, Animal Crossing, Pokemon, Harvest Moon etc. He'll binge these games with you all day and night. Your Sims have to get married to each other it's the law. He enjoys reading what you write - what you don't mind sharing of course. He won't go peeking in your personal writing, he knows it isn't his place. Concerning what you do share he'll read it with great interest and share his thoughts and any ideas he has. He would really enjoy writing something with you, like a short story or a comic. He loves how you convey your writing and would be honored to take part in it. His favorite board game is Candy Land, a close second being Monopoly, followed by Scrabble. He pulls out a big ass dictionary during Scrabble just to prove to people that he knows his vocabulary. He loves you dearly but all bets are off during Monopoly, it's a dog eat dog world and he isn't bailing you out of jail. He will, however, offer you real money in turn for properties in the game. No that isn't cheating the rules say nothing about it. He has no problem with a lazy day in bed though and wouldn't mind just dozing or watching shows together. Any time spent with you is time spent well. You two could watch paint dry together and he would have a blast. He'll buy the paint.

With his personal involvment in hero work he has lots of info on true crime cases and can share stories and books with you. He has everything from small robberies to Ted Bundy and beyond. If you have a question about a true crime case he has an answer. As for psychology I imagine he would study it himself, perhaps as a secondary career or freelance hobby. He'll examine characters from books and movies with you and run his own behavioral analysis unit from his bedroom. The FBI doesn't hold a candle to him. He can, will and already has tracked down your enemies and he has their addresses. With his father being the new number one hero he essentially has the force of the law in his hands and if need be, he will use it. He won't do anything unjust unless your safety is in jeopardy but he won't hesitate to bring someone down. As for history he has plenty of books ranging from founding of countries to wars, to major technological advancements to the invention of toilet paper. He knows some very niche history facts. If you need to impress a teacher with knowledge on history he has you covered. He'll make the teacher quit their job in shame.

Shoto is absolutely loyal to the end, open minded and kind to a fault. He understands how it's like to be ignored, misunderstood and bullied and he won't treat anyone else that way. Regardless of his opinion on someone he still gives them respect and kindness. He doesn't care how rude or petty someone acts, they're still a human and deserve to be treated as such.

He goes out of his way to buy you special gifts, he values personal meaning over monetary value. Between a basic cheap necklace and an expensive bracelet of your favorite gemstone and color, you bet he's going for the bracelet. The cost isn't important to him, he just wants to see your face light up when you open the gift. As for gifts from you he doesn't care about how much you spent, he just wants something from the heart. You could give him an origami swan that cost you nothing to make and he would treasure it like a rare antique. As for quality time, he always enjoys a good movie, board game, cuddle session or just a nap. Like I mentioned before, any time spent together is time spent well.

I hope you enjoyed this friend!! 🥀 I'll be sending my part your way soon, thanks again for the offer! I had a lot of fun with this one 😘

#iidastiddies #mha x reader #bnha x reader #matchup #mha matchup #bnha matchup #matchup exchange #shoto #todoroki #shoto todoroki #todoroki shoto #todoroki x reader #shoto x reader #shoto todoroki x reader #todoroki shoto x reader

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tellywoodtrash · 3 years

Text

immj2 27+28.11.20 lbs

27.11.20

lmao i was gonna get suuuuuuper mad at kabir for being in her room but then he’s like:

“hi.”

....................... and i instantly snorted happily. vishal is realllllllllly just so likable that i just can’t with him anymore. i love when adorable marshmallows like him and shrenu play evil. you just cannot fucking hate them!

blah blah humaara kamra, mera kamra nonsense.

shaadi ka joda gift. with that tackyyyyyyyyyyyyassss KABIR KI RIDDHIMA written on it. main marr jaooon par kabhi bhi aisa kuch na pehnoon, no matter how much i love the guy.

“kuch hi derr mein tum VANSH ki riddhima se, KABIR ki riddhima ho jaogi.” coz even in 2020, women are nothing but chattel to be passed on from one man to another.

riddhima is thinking fat chance, bitch.

telling him she’ll never wear red for him, coz “laal pyaar ka rang hota hai, aur main sirf ek insaan se pyaar karti hoon, aur woh hai vansh.”

“toh yeh bhi vansh ke paise se hi liya hai.” lmaooooooooo

ghani beizzati by saying she’s already bought a joda for herself, a white one. which honestly looks muchhhhhhhhhh nicer than the red one acc. to me but ok.

vansh checking his account balance and seeing that there’s charges for two wholeass designer jodas bought for a shaadi that’s not even gonna happen:

anyway kabir’s like ok who cares, colour doesn’t matter, shaadi toh tumhari honi hai mujhse blah blah.

kabir doesn’t like mandap setup. coz all white. and apparently aryan was in charge of it? coz he’s getting dragged by the collar for it.

good. i don’t feel any sympathy.

ishani is like dekh liya nateeeja iss loserrrrrrrr ki khushaamad karne ka? when has vansh ever treated you like this no matter how mad he’s gotten at you? he always protected you.

behen kyun bhains ke aage been bajaa rahi ho? yeh manhoos baaz nahi aana.

ishani flounced away and aryan’s now vowing revenge against kabir. abbe yaar, tera list toh kabhi khata hi nahi hota.

why the fuck are these ppl soooooooooo dressed up for a wedding they don’t even want to participate in? itna toh main apni genuine shaadi ke liye naa sajjjjjjoon.

suddenly ishani is allllll about bado ka sammaaan and parampara, pratishthaaaaa, anushaasan and all. lmao ok?????

tod di choodi uski kalaayi par. jaisa bhai, waisiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii hi behen.

shaadi mubarak indeed. lol.

riddhima’s calling vihaan and freakingout ki woh paise leke bhaag gaya. you are so fucking stupid sis, why would you give him that much fucking money BEFORE HE EVEN SHOWED THE FUCK UP??????????

“tum thodi weird nahi ho????” bhai obvious sawaal naa pooch.

anyway he’s like calm yo tits, untwist your panties, i’ll get there on time.

kabir instead of fixing his maatam waala mandap is back skulking around vihaan’s container box house. ladki ko shaadi karni bhi nahi hai and she’s sitting there ready from 3 hours before, aur yeh, jissko shaadi ki utaavli chadhi thi, is out doing randomassssss jasoosi, coz that’s the priority rn. sounds legit.

VIHAAN THE DUMBASS TOOK OFF THE CCTV CAMERA AND PACKED IT. GOD YOU’RE ALLLLLLLLLLL FUCKING AQAL KE DUSHMAN IN THIS SHOW.

kabir sneaking in with gunnnnnnn.

how the fuck am i supposed to take him seriously with these bachchon waale sports shoes?!!?!?!? GIVE THE MAN HIS COMBAT BOOTS BACK SO HELP ME GODDDDDD

he’s peeking in the door and making some threatening statements about oh ho yeh hai tumhara plan, main sab khatammmmm kar doonga and all, but we never see wtf he’s looking at and this show is fulllllllllllll of red herrings, so........ idc.

riddhima putting on previous mangalsutra for this wedding and..... guts toh hai bandi main. badiii dheent hai.

mummy coming and saying blah blah usse utaar do this is your new mangalsutra and lmaoooooooooooooo

this is the tackiest fucking shit i’ve ever seen in my life. what’s with their obsession of putting their name on everything!?!!!?!!? what are you, an eight grader?!?!!?!?

anyway, bored with this ainvayi ki dhamki waala scene, fwding.

blah blah 2 ghante mein kaunsa chamatkaar hona hai and all......... WHY ARE YOU PPL SO DAMN OVERCONFIDENT????

meanwhile kabir is back and now harassing dadi. KISI KO TOH AKELA CHOD DE.

actually, lmao, i’d love to see him go try this shit on ishani and angre. it would be fucking glooooooooooorious lololololol.

anyway, he wants dadi’s aashirwaad in the form of vansh’s saafa (pagdi/turban). ABBE YAAAAAAAAAAR. USKE UNDERWEAR DRAWER SE JAAKE USKI CHADDI BHI LEKE PEHEN. ITNAAAAAAAAA WANNABE VILLAIN MAINE AAJ TAK NAHI DEKHA. HADHHHHHHH HAI.

chikni chupdi baatein ki i’m just trying to be the son vansh was to this house. if i wear his saafa, it’s like uski aashirwaad aur duaein meri saath hongi.

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO PICTURE VANSH’S FACE IS LITERALLY LIKE

anyway dadi is like really really fucking hurt by this and my god i wanna fucking murder kabir.

she’s literally telling him to pick anything else, it’s vansh’s nishaani and he’s like aap sab ke paas koi na koi nishaani hai, mere paas apne bhai ki koiiiiiiiii nishaani nahi hai blah blah and oh my god, this is truly the most villainous thing kabir has done, being thisssssss fucking emotionally manipulative. the absolute fuckkkkkkkk.

ugh anyway long story short. baandh diya dadi ne ukso saafa. bloody nonsense.

poor dadi phoot phoot ki ro rahi hai ki she’s losing vansh bit by bit. awwwww man it’s genuinely heartbreaking.

riddhima has witnessed this and is about to fuckkkkkk shit up lolll.

lmaoooooooooooo dayum.

wtf is your problem, i’m marrying you, why are you torturing the fam like this blah blah. kabir like physical, emotional, moral sabbbbbbbbbbb tarah se tod ke rakh doonga inn sabko and ugh god i just really fucking hate him.

but damn he just looks really good in this sherwani and hair all mussed up.

anyway he’s doing some real messed-up, genocidal dictator kinda talk and phew. is just askinggggggggg to be murdered.

and then lmao he abruptly switched to “bohut khoobsurat lag rahi ho tum; time kya ho raha hai???? ooooooh ek ghanta baaki hai.” and i legittttttt lol’d at the way he delivered it. I HATE VISHAL FOR NOT LETTING ME HATE KABIR IN PEACEEEEEEEEE.

riddhima panic-calling vihaan, wants to go check on him. mummy ne pakad liya, room mein badh kar diya coz K told her to handle riddhima’s bhagodi dulhan ways.

great. riddhima’s having a breakdown.

motivational call from the choti sarrdaarni. she kinda just looks like a tall baby shivangi joshi had with aditi dev sharma????

le, doosre show waale heroine ko bhi pata hai kabir kameena hai, iss show mein 3 episode pehle pata chala issko.

ok is the choti sarrdaarni delusional and having a make-believe phone call with the protagonist of her favt tv show IMMJ, coz she knows waaaaay more details than even the people in this house know about the plot and what went down. she’s talking about how vansh aakhri pal tak ladta raha and riddhima’s like huh, news to me, i just got there in time to see him spout some ghatiya shayari and then throw himself off a cliff.

anyway riddhima seems to have gotten strength from this deranged phone call, so............. good for her, i guess.

———————————————————————

28.11.20

next ep just abruptly started with kabir and mummy in riddhima’s room threatening her and i just.......... dude, whatever. i’m just gonna skim through this ep coz i know it’s just filler shit till literally the last 1 minute.

OK HE’S MANHANDLING HER AGAIN AND FUCKKKKKKKKKKK

dang helly looked evennnnnnnn younger in the first eps. legit baby face. at least now they’ve aged her up a lil with the makeup and styling.

he’s saying don’t bother waiting, no one is gonna come. OH BOY. VIHAAN ARE YOU OK????? ARE YOU OK??????? ARE YOU OK VIHAAN?!?!?!?!?

cue riddhima’s panic attack.

lmao kabir telling mummy ki iss shaadi mein ab koi speedbreaker nahi hai lol. heavy foreshadowing that ab se everything that can go wrong is definitely gonna go wrong.

suddenly at the speed of light kabir is back at the container home in his sherwani and saafa and holding vihaan at gunpoint????

oh. sapna tha riddhima ka. ouff. this stupid show has tooooo fucking many dream sequences.

someone give this bitch a klonopin coz watching her is making my anxiety shoot up.

mummy comes into room 2 min later and sees riddhima sleeping ghoongattttt and all. SURE. NOT SUS AT ALL THAT A BRIDE DYING OF ANXIETY WOULD TAKE A NAP 30 MIN BEFORE THE CEREMONY IN FULLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL OUTFIT. TOTALLY A THING THAT HAPPENS.

DUDE SHE PULLED A NURSE WAALI HARKAT AGAIN. LMAOOOOOOOOO. KISKO SULAAAAAKE AAYI HAI TU, AAFAT?!?!?!!?

askdjasldkjlsakdjlaskjdlaskjdlaskjdlkas. ALSO THE FACT THAT MUMMY RECOGNIZED HER FROM HER PRESS ON NAILS. LMAOOOOOOOOOO I CAN’T EVEN WITH THIS SHOW.

LMAO RIDDHIMA YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR

lol mummy has to call and give bad news to kabir. and i am sad we didn’t get to see his volcanic reaction, which no doubt would have been epicccccccccccc.

10 MINUTES TO THE CEREMONY. VR MANSION IS 20 MIN AWAY FROM THE CONTAINER HOUSE (AS STATED BY V BEFORE) AND THIS SIS IS...........

RE DEVAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

she finally got in and the whole place is empty. he practically lives in a storage unit, you telling me he went and moved his stuff to a whole different storage unit?????

new freakout within the pre-existing panic attack: kabir ne vihaan ko saaf kar diya ya vihaan paise leke bhaag gaya??

cut to fb: riddhima asking V all earnestly ki tum dhoka toh nahi doge na????

HIS ASS ACTUALLY SAID, LEMME TELL YOU A FACT ABOUT ME: I LOVE MY MOM. I SWEAR ON HER I WON’T BETRAY YOU.

AND SHE STILL DIDN’T GET THAT HE’S VANSH. MY GODDDDDDDD.

she’s like nope vihaan gave mummy promise so he won’t give dhoka. ah yes, the most sacred and inviolable of promises.

toh bacha alternative ki kabir has vihaan. 4th simultaneous panic attack in a panic attack. someone sedate this bitch.

aaaaaaaaaand kabir has sent a video of a bomb in VR mansion below the mandap. great.

and now he’s calling to say ki get your ass back home or imma scramble these eggheads called the raisinghanias.

lmao the bomb is counting forwards instead of backwards????

mummy saying MY BETA SMAAAAAARTEST. haan, tha..... kisi zamaane mein. ab nihaayati bewakoof ho gaya hai.

lmao kabir accosted a passing by angre and is like you need to be loyal to me as you were to vansh and lol angre’s like saaf saaf shabdon mein, fuckkkkkkk off.

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO KABIR WENT TO HURL THE NAARIYAL AT ANGRE’S RETREATING HEAD HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MAN HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO HATE HIM HE’S SO FUCKING HILARIOUS

lmao he goes to phodofy naariyal and:

abhi bappa ko huullllllllll de raha hai. overconfidence ki hadh toh dekho.

riddhima is back and hunting for the bomb and kabir comes bouncing the fake bomb around and she’s legit like TUMNE MUJHSE JHOOOOOT BOLA?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!? lol bitch, seriously???? because he’s been the paragon of truth and virtue up until this moment??????

“apna hulia sudhaar ke aao. 5 min mein mrs. kabir banne waali ho. thoda standard toh match karo.” lmaooooo the sasss and disdaaaaaain he said that withhhhhh. boy knows he’s looking damn good today.

anyway blah blah shaadi has started. dadi is sad af. to the point where ishani is looking really concerned. i really love this soft ishani.

“kaash samay ka paiyya ulta ghoom jaaye aur mera vansh wapis aa jaaye mere paas.”

dadi, shoulda asked for world peace instead. just the one wish you had and you wasted it on getting your hellion pota back.

some more in-room threatening of riddhima by mummy. while riddhima is throwing out last minute prayers to bappa and vihaan ki bas just do something and stop this whole shitshow.

vihaan ka toh pata nahi, the shady fuck, but bappa like:

i gotchu girl.

bhaari bhaari flashback waali walk down the stairs.

HE EVEN SAID THE MAA LINE AS VIHAAN IN THE VANSH VOICE. SHE GOTTA BE SOOOOO FUCKING STUPID MY GODDDDDDD.

ouffffff so much time wasteeeeeeeeeee.

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaand....................

watch that he was wearing while falling off the cliff? ✅✅✅

wedding ring that was not found on the dead body????? ✅✅✅

“YEH SHAADI NAHI HO SAKTI” booooooooming across the whole damn neighbourhood in the fakest deep voice everrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr???? ✅✅✅

———————————————————————

precap:

haan yeh sab toh theek hai.............. 😕😕😕

par asli sexxxxxxxxx waali chemistry idhar hai!!!!!!!! UNFFFFFF. 🤩🤩🤩

#ishq mein marjawan 2 #immj2 #immj2 lbs #episode liveblogs

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allthingshetalia · 4 years

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can we pls get a scenario of femreader being bffs with gil. like they literally are together for everything to the point ppl say/think they are a couple. but luddy has had a crush since forever on her but ofc puts gils happiness before his. turns out, she returns his feeling too. this could apply to a humanau but you may do as you like tbh your writing is good. stay safe bb and thanks.

💕I love this so much!!! Thank you!!💕

The large blonde grumbled to himself as he scrubbed the dishes. He could hear your melodic laughs from the livingroom as you and Gilbert were having a pillow fight. He felt horrible. You were suppose to be like a sister to him. I mean Gil always referred to you as his sister, so didn’t that technically mean you were his sister too?

He wanted nothing more than for those laughs to be because of him. They were sometimes, but not near enough to his liking. It was so juvenile. Even if you did return his feelings he would feel horrible for stealing his brothers closet friends. But yet another part of him thought about how nice to would be. You and Gil could do your shenanigans when he was doing his paperwork. You could all eat dinner together- expect for when he took you on a date of course.

But yet he didn’t want to cause a divide. What if him and Gil fought? Whose side would you take? He obviously hoped you would take his side considering you would be his girlfriend, but Gil had seniority over him.

No. You are just as close with him as you are with Gilbert. That’s a lie. And the fact that, that is a lie makes his stomach hurt.

“Careful you don’t break that plate. It’s an antique from the 1700s.” Gilbert’s voice rang out. Ludwig jumped and looked over his shoulder.

“Sorry.” Ludwig grumbled. The Prussian hummed and grabbed a beer from the fridge.

“You good?” The Prussian mumbled. He assumed he asked quietly because he didn’t want you to hear. The blonde nodded, not looking at his brother. “You could tell me you know.”

‘No I can’t.’ Ludwig thought. The blonde finally looked over at him and nodded his head so Gilbert would leave him alone. The Prussian gave him the familiar look of ‘this conversation isn’t over’ and popped back into the livingroom with you. Ludwig finally finished the dishes and decided it was time to take the dogs for a nightly walk. He usually just lets them out the back door but decided he needed to get out of the house.

“I’m going with you!” Gilbert shouted as Ludwig threw on his coat. Ludwig groaned, but maybe it meant you would come along too.

“You two have fun! I’m going to go take a shower and get ready for bed.” You laughed, throwing the throw pillow back on the couch.

“Who invited you to stay the night?” Gilbert teased poking your side.

“Shut up!” You laughed. You paused for a moment and bent down petting Berlitz head. “You take good care of them! Don’t let anyone attack them at night.” You laughed as the dog seemed to understand you, because he nodded his head. “Have fun!” You shouted before running up the stairs.

The two brothers were just about to leave when you poked your head out from the top of the stairs. “Wait! Ludwig can I use your shower? Gilbert’s is disgusting! I promise to leave it nice and clean!”

That did more to the blonde than you will ever know. First of all, you naked. Second of all, naked in a space he is also naked in. Third of all, you’re gonna be naked. The blonde swallowed thickly trying so hard to stop the blood rushing to his head I’ll let you decide which one sorry.

“That’s fine.” He cringed when that came out as a squeak. Flashing him a smile your head disappeared up the stairs.

Ludwig quickly opened the front door enjoying the way the freezing cold chilled his overheated body. Blackie yelped even though he was wearing a little doggy coat and Aster pulled at her lease wanting to see if there was any ice she could play with on the ground. Gilbert closed the door behind him and took Aster’s lease from Ludwigs hand, knowing she was more than enough of a handful and she’s gils favorite.

“So what am I going to have to do to get you to talk?” Gilbert mused, nudging his brother with his elbow.

“I have no idea what you are talking about.” Ludwig stated. His tone was perfectly normal but Gil could see straight through him.

“Does this have anything to do with your undying love for my best friend?” Ludwig choked on his spit and he stopped in his tracks.

“How did you know about that?” Ludwig quickly grimaced when he realized how easily he gave that away.

“It’s so obvious! I’ve known you since you were this tall.” Gilbert placed his hand against the middle part of his thigh. “I see the way your eyes get all mushy when you see her and that stupid tiny smile that is on your face.”

Ludwig groaned and ran a hand down his face, continuing to walk. “How long have you known?”

“Since you’ve started liking her! At first I thought it was gross because she is toooo young for you.” Gilbert teased.

“Everyone on this earth is too young for us.”

“Thats a sad fact, especially if you’re with an older woman- because then you realize you are actually older than her.” Gilbert sighed.

“You are speaking from experience.”

“Well I’ve had a lot of experience.” Gilbert chuckled. It was silent for a moment. “You know she likes you too.”

“What?!?” Ludwig glared at his brother stopping his walk once more. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I wanted to make sure you were both right for each other. You are both the two most important people in my life. I didn’t want her to hurt you or you to hurt her. But you two would be really good together and I would make a great uncle.” Despite Gilberts joking attitude his words made Ludwig smile.

“I know it could put you in a bad situation. I mean what if things don’t work out?” The blonde mused, sighing when he realized he had to pick up his dogs poop.

“I’ll just stay out of your guys relationship! from this day on you can’t come to me for advice and she can’t come to me for advice! So that way I’m not in the center if things go badly. But you do have to know that if this happens and both of you break up- which won’t happen because you two belong together, she is still going to be my best friend and you will have to see her.”

“Like you could stay out of it.” Ludwig grumbled throwing the doggy bag away. “But honestly that’s a risk I’m willing to take, if she is of course.”

“We could have so much fun! We could all go camping, and hiking and work out together. We’ll be like a big happy family.” The thought of all of that made excitement bubble up in Ludwigs chest replacing the uncertainty.

He absolutely adores you. He would rather date you for a week and have you hate him forever than not even try to date at all. You two worked so well together too. Before he could get to far along in his daydream Ludwig thought of something.

“How do you know she likes me?” The question caused a loud laugh to escape the Prussian.

“I always had a small suspicion, but remember Alfred’s party a while back, when he made us play 7 minutes in heaven?” Ludwig hummed recalling that night. He actually liked that party because you got a little too tipsy and hung onto his arm, so you wouldn’t fall. He loved the fact that you trusted him even in your drunken slur. “Well I asked her why she didn’t put anything in the hat and she said it was because you didn’t put anything in the hat. And you were the only one she would want to be in the closet with.” Ludwig smiled wider than he should have at that statement.

“See that’s what I’m talking about.” Gilbert laughed, pointing at him. “That lovesick grin.” Gilbert made a sound of disgust before turing around heading back to the house. “But I’m happy. You’ve never looked at anything like that and you’re my little brother. I want nothing more than for you to be happy.”

Ludwig blushed and rolled his eyes.

-back inside! Sorry this is so long!-

“Thanks again for letting me use your shower.” You smiled flopping down on the couch.

“It’s nothing. If you want to put some stuff in there I don’t mind. I’ve never been in his bathroom but I’ve heard the horror stories.” Ludwig chuckled. You laughed along with him.

“Thanks Ludbug. I will move some stuff in there tomorrow.” You joked. But you were also serious. Deadly serious. “How was your walk?” You asked. You laid down on the couch causing your feet to press against the outside of his thigh. You didn’t want to be a creep but you also hoped he wouldn’t move away. He blushed and you suddenly felt like you shouldn’t have brought it up. But before Ludwig could anwser Gilbert came trotting down the stairs in a dress shirt and nice slackes. The first few buttons were undone and his hair was gelled nicely.

“Awww does someone have a date? Why didn’t you tell me?!” You sat up quickly. You rolled so your legs were under your butt but this new postition caused your shoulder to almost hit Ludwigs.

“It’s not a date! Francis, Toni and Alfred called. They invited you too but I already said you were asleep.” You breathed a sigh of relief. You hated going out with all of them by yourself. They always got a little too drunk and being the only girl made you a little uncomfy- unless Lud was there of course. He always kept you safe. Like this one time a guy tried to slip you a roofie and Ludwig caught it before you did. He completely knocked they guy out in one punch and turned him over to the police. You shook yourself out of the daydream and stared at noticed that both brothers were looking at you expectantly.

“What?” You asked.

“Is that okay?” Gilbert repeated. He had a small smirk on his face like he knew where your mind went, but knowing him he probably did.

“Of course it’s okay!” You assured.

“Have fun you two!” Gilbert shouted as he walked out the door.

“Car keys!” You and Ludwig shouted in unison. You both blushed and looked at each other. The albino rushed in and grabbed his keys from the front table and turned back around, smiling to himself.

“Did he seem weird to you?” You questioned. You unconsciously leaned closer to Ludwig.

“He’s always weird.” He chuckled. He threw his arm back over the couch, causing you to realize what you did. You felt a little hurt think he didn’t want you to be near him.

“Sorry!” You yelped, scooting away from him.

“Nein!” His voice boomed causing you to jump. “Sorry I-I don’t mind.”

“Really?” You wanted to slap yourself. You sounded like a stupid high school girl. You both leaned back up in the couch and stared at the blank TV. “Can I ask you something?” You turned so you were facing him. He nodded and adjusted so he was turned towards you as well.

“Do you have a crush on anyone?” You needed to know. He stiffened and adverted his eyes away from you.

“Ja.” He replied softly. He looked back at you and stared directly into your eyes.

“Do you?” He leaned a little closer to you and something in your body told you he knew.

“Ja.” You giggled copying his accent. You moved a little closer so your forehead bumped against his. His eyes softened and his hand went up and he stroked your cheek with the back of his pointer finger. The little action caused your heart to melt.

You both smiled lightly before finally capturing each other’s lips in a kiss.

And neither of you noticed the very teary eyed Prussian in the doorway.

#allthingshetalia #hetalia #hetalia blog #germany x reader #aphgermany #germany hetalia #germanyhetalia #hetalia imagine blog #x reader #germany headcons #germany headcannons #ludwig beilschmidt #prussia hetalia #gilbert beilschmidt

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excorcismic · 4 years

Text

YES i caved n’ decided to pick up my boy and YES i’m trying ,,, to right a quick rundown and plotting post while yearning for the sweet release of sleep bc orientation sapped me of all my energy BUT !! i’m , , , so excited . to pick up leon . so excited . i love this man more than anything and i’m OVER THE MOON to pick him up so let’s get on with it before i repeat myself one more time !!

IN A CANON NUTSHELL : so leon is a character originating from resident evil 2 ; he’s considered one of the chief protagonists of the series , but not the first . in his first appearance he’s a rookie cop and his first day on the job , raccoon city is overrun by zombies ( infected humans rather than the undead , though ) and after that day . . . leon can’t do it & because of his heroism for dealing with the raccoon city debacle , he’s made into a government agent instead . in resident evil 4 , he’s tasked with rescuing ashley - the president’s daughter - and ends up uncovering & battling a cult known as the los illuminados as they have their own zombie virus known as the plaga . then . . . in resident evil 6 dude ends up actually . killing the president because of the president getting infected with a zombie virus . long story short , leon’s been through a shit ton of zombie apocalypses ( and other monsters the virus creates ) and he’s exhausted . he tries to go on a vacation and then chris redfield busts in like that dancing paul rudd gif so even THEN homie can’t catch a break . but he’s a very good dude & perhaps one of the most good-hearted , selfless people on the planet - it’s just sad because he started out with so much hope and after witnessing so much horror that hope fades and is replaced with exhaustion & even a bit of cynicism . but not enough as to where he turns into a person that won’t give you the shirt off his back because oh yeah , he is . he’s just maybe a bit more distant and doesn’t smile as much as he used to .

IN AN ALUCARD NUTSHELL : so leon is a former paramedic ( that sometimes still is called to do things ) turned hospital nurse - he was known for being the hero of the story multiple times in horrifying cases , and he’s overall gotten a pretty good reputation as a medic . however , the reason why he moved onto nursing was because the stress got too much for him for those dire situations after his divorce from his wife - miss cordelia chase . and now he’s just kind of trying to get through things but . things aren’t the best on his end even though he’ll try his best to power on through . he’s pretty okay but not great you know ??

BUT OOOOHHHH YOU WANNA PLOT WITH LEON SO BAD OOOOHHH

just to start off by saying idk if this list will be as long as misa’s bc it’s currently shortly after midnight and i’m getting more and more tired & incoherent as the clock just ticks away -

BUT ANYWAY . ppl who routinely come into the office / hospital he works at would be p cool and know him pretty well as a nurse from that . he doesn’t work in the ER most of the time ; though sometimes . he mainly is in the office doing stuff for checkups and all , clinical things . honestly tho it would be a bit of an interesting connection if sb went to the ER for embarrassing / stupid reasons ( party gone embarrassingly wrong , for example ) and leon’s the guy that has to help with it . just a Thought .

also coworkers !! idk if we have anyone from the medical field yet but there’s also that .

again he was married to cordelia so if ppl who know cordelia know him as cordelia’s ex-husband we can run w/ that and make smth out of that as well .

leon is also . kinda . lonely . like misa . can y’all see I Have A Type when it comes to muses AHHH - but anyways he spends a lot of his nights at bars and stuff so maybe some drinking/bar buddies he sticks with or the like . maybe waiters/bartenders who know him pretty well just from the fact he’s a regular , kinda know what’s going on with the dude .

like misa , neighbors . he’s not a spunk twenty-four year-old emo-fashioned mr. rogers like misa is but he’s a caring dude who looks out for them .

speaking of caring - maybe some ppl leon’s saved as a paramedic or in general just patients he treated for a while ?? i just . rly like the thought of leon caring for people on the job and then he finds them outside of it and he subtly cares for them off the job too . maybe even if it’s doing as much as sitting with them or comforting them when a loved one’s in the hospital or something . idk i just . like how much leon cares abt people .

okay so people from high school bc i lowkey headcanon leon wasn’t a troublemaker but he was more of a bad boy/rebel type just for the fact he had a tendency to do things that weren’t . by the rules . by the book . never mean or anything just maybe sometimes would hang out at abandoned buildings or late at night and now he’s significantly mellowed out and maybe that rebel is still somewhere inside of him but ur gonna have to dig it out a bit . and this could rly be anything too like friends , enemies , exes ( leon is bi u can pry that from my cold dead hands ) , etc . prom / homecoming dates , people who only knew him as a kid that got busted once for drinking alcohol in the back of somebody’s truck , etc . let’s have Fun with this .

also in general , just some good friends he’s always had ?? people who’ve known him for a long while and have still stuck with him .

exes !! whether it be pre-marriage or post-divorce . post-divorce i don’t think leon would rly stick in the relationship for long given he more than likely was not prepared at the time ( probably didn’t go past a few months , def some were just one-shot dates ) . again , he’s bi & capcom cannot take that away from me .

maybe a found family of sorts - leon . . . would be a great dad so maybe some younger folks he kinda dads over without meaning to .

AND AGAIN RLY . . . anything i’m sorry if this isn’t as detailed as misa’s bt IF I GET MORE IDEAS I SHALL ADD !!

this is long again i’m so sorry bt again react or like if ur interested in any of these connections !! imma retire 2 mobile n try to get some shut-eye .

#░ ★ abt . ❛ 🇦🇳🇩 🇩🇪🇸🇵🇮🇹🇪 🇪🇻🇪🇷🇾🇹🇭🇮🇳🇬﹐ 🇮·🇲 🇸🇹🇮🇱🇱 🇭🇺🇲🇦🇳 / leon s. kennedy #dhq.plots #alcohol mention

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