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roosterbox · 3 months

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Heyyyyyyy Steddie thinky thought time again! And I’m putting it under a cut because, YET AGAIN, my hand slipped and I accidentally almost 2,000 words.

Tags: ANGST, miscommunication, HOH!Steve, Mean-and-Overly-Defensive!Eddie

So picture this, if you will…

High school AU. Probably no Upside-Down. Steve is deaf/HOH. He signs, but he knows that not everyone else does, and so few take the time to learn, especially not for him, so he usually carries around a notepad too. Just in case. Someone (probably Dustin, lbr) asks him to sit in on a Hellfire meeting. Heck, maybe even asks him to join. Steve is unsure, but he’s open to new experiences and Dustin always makes his favorite club sound really awesome (also the guy who runs the club is super cool and hot too, but shhhhhh). So sure - he’ll check it out.

The day comes and Steve gets there early. Like really early. In fact, he’s there before anyone else. Which is fine; he can use the extra free time to do a little homework, right? Thing is though, he’s so focused on his notebook that he doesn’t notice somebody else come in - Eddie. And there are four important things to note about Eddie.

He doesn’t know Steve is deaf.

He doesn’t know that Steve has been explicitly invited here by Dustin.

He knows Steve only by his reputation. So, not good.

He’s as protective of his club and the kids in it as a mama bear.

Needless to say, these four factors combine into a perfect storm, and Eddie is immediately on the offensive.

“Hey!” He says. “Hey, Harrington!” He continues when he gets no acknowledgement. “What the fuck are you doing here?”

No answer. Steve doesn’t even look at him. Just keeps writing in his notebook.

“Hey asshole! I’m talking to you!” Eddie’s volume is rising, as is his temper. Despite his uncle’s best efforts, Eddie’s never been the best at keeping cool. But, man, the disrespect. It tends to eat at him. And coming from King Steve of all people? Oooooooh doesn’t that just make his blood boil. Eddie stalks over to where Steve is sitting. If he thinks he’s gonna waltz in there and tease or humiliate any of Eddie’s little sheepies, he’s got another thing coming.

Steve, meanwhile, is just happily doing his homework. Maybe doodling a little in the margins. Wondering if Eddie looks as cool running the club as he does around school. Especially when he’s up on the lunch tables ranting about conformity. He’s so lost in thought that a sudden hand on his arm shocks him out of his chair, up to his feet. And just like that, he’s face to face with his secret crush, the one and only Eddie Munson. He smiles, but only for a moment as he sees Eddie’s furious expression. The other boy’s lips are moving. A little fast, but Steve does his best to read them.

“-hell are you doing here, Harrington? This isn’t one of your stupid jock sports teams. If you’re here to hurt these kids-“

Steve’s eyes widen. He tries to sign something. No, no.

Eddie sees Steve looking scared, waving his hands. It only serves to make him angrier. Steve sees he’s getting nowhere with sign, so he grabs his notepad and starts writing. He can still see Eddie saying something in his periphery, and he tries to write fast. To clear up any misunderstanding.

But then. Eddie goes too far. He manages to hit on one of Steve’s biggest insecurities mid-rant. And then he keeps digging at it. Steve stops writing and just… stares. Like a dog, Eddie cannot let go of the bone he’s found, so he keeps going. Insert any list of your favorite Steve insecurities here. His upbringing. His (bad) relationship with his parents. His reputation (which Steve hates so much). His intelligence. His fighting skills or lack thereof (poor Steve: getting beat up in every universe). And the worst part is how mean Eddie is about it. The kids tease Steve too, and yeah sometimes it hurts, but it’s never felt as outright cruel as it does when Eddie says it.

Steve’s eyes fill with tears, despite his best efforts, and while Eddie is mid sentence, Steve decides he’s had enough. He shoves his notepad at Eddie, into his chest, eliciting a surprised huffed exhale, before grabbing his bag and just running. He runs out the door, out of the building, to his car, and drives himself home. He doesn’t stop crying for hours.

Eddie, after the surprise of Steve shoving him and running out, just rolls his eyes. “Typical,” he mutters under his breath. “Fucking prick.”

He looks down at the notepad in his hands, still mad but also curious as to what Steve had thought was so important that he just had to start scribbling it down while Eddie yelled at him. And…

Not here to hurt, I swear. Dustin invited me. He’s like my little brother. I’m deaf - sorry couldn’t hear you talking. I’ve seen you around, and I think you’re pretty cool. I’ve never played DND before, but Dustin really loves it. Maybe I could-

That’s as far as it went. And man. Imagine the feeling of your heart sinking, dropping down past your stomach, through the ground itself before finally coming to a stop in the molten core of the earth. Imagine that, and you may experience a fraction of the almost instantaneous levels of guilt Eddie feels at that moment. All at once he thinks of how Steve had looked at him after he first got his attention. He had smiled. Fucking grinned. He was happy to see him. Happy to be there. Eager to see what Hellfire was all about. Eager to learn.

And Eddie had just taken that happiness, that earnest interest, and stomped on it. Crushed it utterly beneath his sneakers as if it were a cigarette butt.

The other guys start filing in. Including Dustin. But before he can say anything (maybe to ask where Steve is, and why the hell does Eddie have his notepad), Eddie shoves past them out the door.

“Eddie, what-“ Jeff starts.

“I’ll be right back,” Eddie calls over his shoulder as he quickly makes his way outside. Just in time to see Steve’s car speeding out of the parking lot. He curses, loud enough that a few students still milling about jump at the unexpected noise. Eddie doesn’t care. He messed up. He really fucking messed up, didn’t he?

He makes it up to Steve eventually. It takes time, of course; Steve’s trust is a hard thing to earn even on a good day, but after that first encounter? They’re not just starting at zero; they’re practically starting at -1000. He starts small. Little exchanges here and there. Usually with Dustin (or, occasionally, Steve’s best friend Robin, who looks at Eddie like she would flay him alive if Steve gave her the word) acting as a sort of buffer. It takes almost half a dozen of these group encounters before Steve says (writes) a single word to him, and even then it’s perfunctory. Cold. Simple. And it definitely hurts, just a little, especially since Eddie’s crush that he’s had on Steve since freshman year has been steadily growing with every exchange they have. As monosyllabic (if even syllabic at all) as they tend to be on Steve’s part. But every time he feels that hurt, Eddie thinks of how Steve had looked at him when he left the club that day. How sad and angry and frustrated. And he pushes his own (tiny, inconsequential by comparison) hurt aside. I can do more, he thinks.

One day, he manages to corner Steve on his own, without Dustin or Robin. Steve is annoyed - he still gets that sinking feeling of hurt whenever he’s with Eddie (which is enhanced (terribly so) by the stupid crush he has), and immediately pulls out his notepad. Starts writing on it. Something simple and to the point. Leave Me Alone. Or maybe Go Away. He gets as far as the first word before he realizes that Eddie isn’t talking. Not aloud, anyway. No, he’s signing. A bit clumsily, and a few of the words are wrong but close enough to understand. One sign is chief among them, though.

I’m sorry.

And in that moment, maybe, it hits home for Steve that Eddie really means it. Means it enough to try and learn an entirely new language to meet Steve where he is. He looks in Eddie’s eyes and he can see the guilt and shame swimming there. The hurt is still in him, that’s not going away with one apology (though this isn’t the first one Eddie has given him, of course), but still. Steve scratches out what he had been writing in favor of something else. After a second, he hands Eddie the paper.

I can’t forgive you. Not yet. You really hurt me. But thank you. When did you start learning to sign?

He sees Eddie’s eyes get a little watery as he reads, but then he’s handed back the notepad. He had thought that Eddie might take the easier route and just write it down, but no. Instead, with his hands free, Eddie continues signing.

A couple days ago. Stayed up all night. His cheeks were darkening. Blushing in shame at his rudimentary skills. Bad at it. Sorry.

And maybe it’s just because Eddie is one of only a handful of people Steve has met that have taken it upon themselves to learn sign, or maybe it’s that damn crush he can’t seem to lose, but Steve shakes his head. No, he signs, trying to keep it simple. Good.

Eddie looks away, signing Bad again. Steve touches his hand, the first point of actual physical contact they’ve had since that day at the Hellfire Club. Their eyes meet, and Steve signs, with as much emphasis as he can, GOOD. And then, Thank You.

Eddie looks down, suddenly feeling oddly shy. He’s still blushing but he also can’t help but smile. There’s the ghost of a dimple on his cheek, making Steve’s heart give a weak little flutter.

You’re welcome, Eddie signs.

After a long moment, Steve writes something down. He doesn’t want to overwhelm Eddie with signs yet. Not to mention that he doesn’t know how deep his (apparently only days-old) knowledge base goes. Best to go easy on him.

Maybe we could… start over?

He holds it up for Eddie to read, face a picture of inquisitive hope. The other boy nods, starts trying to sign, but gets frustrated rather quickly before holding out his hand for the notepad. Steve chuckles and hands it over, not missing the way Eddie’s blush deepens even further at the sound he probably made. Maybe his crush isn’t as one-sided as he’d been thinking.

Yes! Absolutely! If we are, then consider this your “first” official invitation to the Hellfire Club. Today, after school. (There’s a “I” here but it’s scribbled out) We would love to have you there.

I’ll be there, Steve writes. And, after Eddie reads it, he makes sure to get the other boy’s attention before he slowly signs the same thing. I’ll be there.

#stranger things #Steddie #my stuff #writing is hard #rooster’s thinky thoughts #deaf steve harrington #mean eddie munson #miscommunication #angst #and then they fell in love?#yup #they definitely did #lol

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strwberri-milk · 11 months

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How about Kaeya and/or Diluc with a reader who’s a childhood friend that had to move to another country and who they originally thought was a boy but when the reader moves back they end up not recognizing them at all at first due to the changes that has happened to the reader.

And by changes I mean the reader has developed large breasts and hips.

Feel free to reject if you don’t feel comfortable writing this.

im going to change this request a little bit!! ive changed it more to just. a childhood friend moving away and then they come back and kaeya and diluc have a "oh no theyre hot" moment also for some reason this is modern au and i have no idea why but it just happened and diluc and kaeya dont hate each other so yeah <3

They both remember growing up with you of course! You were one of the first friends that they made, and the two of them routinely enjoyed spending time with you. You were able to be the middle ground between them both, mediating arguments or just being the person they can rely on if they're having a bad day.

Not only that, but they would do the same for you. Even as young as you three were, you knew that to find people who cared for you like Kaeya and Diluc would. That's why when you found out you were moving you were absolutely devastated. Not having them felt like some kind of punishment that you didn't want to deal with but you're a child. You can't do anything about it.

Neither of them forgot about you. They would talk about you every once in a while, or try to reach out to you. With being as young as the three of you were nobody thought to try and ask you for the address to your new place, or ask the adults to give someone a number to contact. There was never a need for it before after all, and it was too late by the time they remembered.

One day out of the blue the two of them found themselves added into a groupchat randomly on Instagram. They were both ready to just ignore the message when they realise it was your name. As soon as you provided some information that proved that it really was you, they just had to arrange a meetup for the first time in over ten years.

Both of them were incredibly excited, ready to catch up and spend time with you before you presumably left to go chase whatever it was that you were doing in your time apart. Neither of them expected to see you and immediately find themselves almost swooning over you.

Diluc was always smoother and more able to come off as cold and aloof in his adult life. You had no idea how to respond to this man - who was very attractive mind you - that seemed to parry your responses with tailored ones of his own. Any hint of the hyperactive child that you used to know seemed to be gone.

On the other hand, Diluc never thought that you could stir up these feelings in him. He always felt as though you were someone incredibly close and important to him but there was nothing in him that expected to see just how amazing you looked. He knew that he always admired you (and Kaeya knows it's a crush that Diluc won't acknowledge) and he absolutely loved hearing about your accomplishments but

He held your gaze as though you were just a business partner, unsure of what to say to you. You were smiling so brightly and his heart ached at the sight of it. He found himself so easily lost in your attention that he was sure you could tell. However, judging by how engaged you are in your conversation with Kaeya he's starting to doubt that.

He definitely wants to spend some more time with you one on one and ends up giving you his number. The feelings that were coming up in his chest were starting to not feel all platonic and the only way he could determine that for sure would be to spend more time with you.

You were shocked to see how outgoing Kaeya became in your absence. He was always such a quiet kid, clinging to Diluc's sleeves and now here he was in front of you, tits out.

He easily carried the conversation with Diluc, the two of them eagerly trying to tell you about things in their life. Kaeya however was only doing it with the thinly veiled layer of panic that you'd see through his facade and how his childhood affection for you was beginning to grow into something stronger.

Seeing you again after so long was stirring those emotions up again in him and he didn't know how to cope with them. He was trying to cover it up by diverting your conversation to Diluc but that wasn't working as well as he'd hoped since all it did was give him the opportunity to admire you even more.

When the three of you part ways he slips you his number as well, telling you that there's no way he's going to let you disappear for a decade again after he's finally got a taste of you again.

#kaeya x reader #diluc x reader #kaeya alberich x reader #diluc ragnvindr x reader #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader

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emotionaldepravity · 5 months

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Arranged Marriage HCs with various JJK Characters

The focus is on characters in the big three clans. Made sure to include Maki. Also included Naoya.... ahhhh! Sorry I need to write about the worst guy. I just... I have to...Also this has manga spoilers in almost all sections. If you don't know what Noritoshi's new haircut looks like, don't read this!!!!!!!!!!!!

Satoru Gojo

-Satoru gets away with a lot of things, but since he made no attempts to find a partner, he is more or less forced to agree that he has to get married.

-While many marriage requests came though, Gojo doesn't read them, he picks the sole person he plans to meet randomly.

-You just happen to be the unlucky pick. The first meeting with him is eventful with how casual he is with you despite being mostly strangers.

- He teases you constantly talking about how he is your husband to be. Honestly on lookers would think you were madly in love from his actions. He always is touching you and saying how lucky you are to get to be marrying him.

-The wedding is insanely extravagant to his tastes. Though people from other clans might not be invited, he forces Megumi to be the flower "girl." At the very least, you can convince Satoru to let the poor kid wear a suit instead of a dress.

-Once you are married, the only thing he talks about is having a kid. He is sure that since he is so good looking that the kid will be powerful and good looking too. Hope you are ready for the future...

Maki Zen'in

-Maki would kill anyone before she'd be forced down the aisle by her shitty clan. The clan only cares about the politics of the marriage so there is a good chance that they would humiliate her (and you) by marrying her off when she isn't even a part of the clan anymore.

-However, say you just happened to be the classmate she had a crush on. She might be less likely to kill you. However, that doesn't mean that she would just be okay with it.

-She'd rather get to know you properly and most likely she wouldn't ever get married to you if she actually did come to like you as a person. Her desire to change the clan would override any feelings of being happy in a relationship with you.

-Of course, once she slaughters her clan, she wouldn't plan on contacting you again. Even if you met up during the Culling Games, she wouldn't acknowledge anything but you being an ally or enemy. She is a weapon built to kill.

-The future seems impossible for you two, but at least she is finally free of obligation. Just don't try to pressure into anything for your own sake.

Noaya Zen'in

-Noaya is an asshole to you immediately since he knows he can get away with it. Even if he insults your whole clan, he knows you'll have no choice but to marry him. After all, your clan was desperate enough to send you to the Zen'in clan.

-He doesn't bother to remember your name before the wedding. The wedding itself is less of a party and more of a funeral with the quick, "say a few words and exchange rings." No one cheers and no one even seems to care that its suppose to be a celebration.

-He demands total submission, and you'll give it to him or else. You'll be expected to wait on him hand and foot. Don't dare try to ignore him or he will be more than happy than to cut off your ear for not listening.

-Though he is a bastard, he wouldn't let anyone else treat you as bad as he treats you. You are his now for better or worse. No one can break his toy but him.

-If he comes to love you, things won't be any easier for you than if he hated you. He'll start to expect affection from you and for you to stay closer to him in general. If you manage to somehow put him off and not receive his ire, he might actually ignore you. Of course this only works if he happens to finds someone to cheat on you with.

-Even if he does hate you and you survived the Zen'in massacre, Naoya wouldn't come after you as a curse. You are an afterthought to his revenge. Congrats!

Noritoshi Kamo ... not that one

-Noritoshi is extremely respectful if not cold to you at first. He has been told the whole time he was "accepted" by the clan that this would be one of his duties. He has been mentally preparing himself for a while.

-He understands that this is both something neither of you want, but he puts his whole heart into making things comfortable. This is another step towards his mother coming back into his life. If he can do anything to make things less awkward for you, he will.

-The wedding is small, clearly as an insult to him. He seems very upset that his mother couldn't attend, but he pushes the thought back when he sees you all dressed up. Overcome with excitement and emotion, you can tell that his smile is more genuine which eases your own nerves. Those that do attend would compliment you both on how lovely the two of you look together.

-Depending on how you two decide to navigate the relationship, he will either grow close to you over time or keep his distance. He would hate for his marriage to be loveless, but he wouldn't even force you to be friendly towards him.

-Once you let him in, he'd do everything he can for your happiness. He is extremely self sacrificing for someone he loves.

-If Kenjaku doesn't claim you for himself as his property when taking back his spot as Clan Head, Noritoshi will ask you to wait for him to return. Even if you are an able bodied sorcerer, he wouldn't want you throwing your life away in the Culling Games.

-Of course that doesn't mean he will work toward staying alive for you as he puts his life on the line. Forgotten by his mother, he is sure that his sinking ship will be forgotten by you too. At least you will be free.

-Hopefully one day the both of you will reunite. You will go with him to his mother and live happily...

Megumi Fushiguro

-Megumi would roll his eyes at anyone that was introduced to him.

-He doesn't have any intentions of marrying anyone for a clan he doesn't feel apart of, but he understands that the least he could do is make some effort.

-He might be willing to get to know you and might even come to terms with marrying you if he likes you. Of course that is a tall order since he wants someone who can reconcile his ideals and be willing to take care of his step sister with him.

-Of course, as time goes on, him becoming clan head falls though which saves both of you from said duty. Even if Megumi is totally unaware of it at the moment.

-Hopefully, you didn't choose to take part in the Culling Games...

#is it a cop out if you don't actually get married to half the people on here-#i just... ahhhh #you know how it is #the abusive relationship i have with gege is certainly something #megumi x reader #noritoshi x reader #gojo x reader #maki x reader #naoya x reader #jjk x reader

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fangsforiris · 15 days

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Hi! Could you do some general crush headcanons for Shu? He's my absolute favourite character and I love how you write him! ❤️❤️❤️

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Shū Sakamaki Crush HC's

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Thank you, Anon. He's also one of my favourites, so this was fun to write!!

Word Count: 1192 Included Topics: General, Physical, & Emotional/Personality.

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General Crush HC's:

💛 Right off the bat, Shū wouldn’t want to believe it.

💛 Let alone accept that he’d ever have a crush.

💛 He’s not a little boy anymore. He’s grown up, he’s an adult. There’s no reason for him to be feeling this sort of attachment again.

💛 It’s something he’d chalk up to his mind playing tricks on him again.

💛 Not to mention, that this was juvenile. Shū isn’t like Ayato or Subaru. He doesn’t have time to be messing around with these types of feelings.

💛 However, considering he’s the oldest, and has had the most experience with this feeling, he’d know the signs straight away.

💛 Especially when it's concerning his quick changes. Or anything involving him at all.

💛 From the way he became more proactive, to caring a bit more in the way he came across to others (or more specifically… you.), and the way he had the urge of being something.

💛 It doesn’t look like it, but when Shū was younger he definitely was more of a ‘fangirl’ crush-haver. But in secret of course.

💛 He’d be our current day ‘delulu is the solulu’ girls/boys. The ones who’d find it refreshing and fun to be in love.

💛 Looks are very deceiving with this one when he’s in love.

💛 He’d over analyze every single interaction, and would hope for the best.

💛 (His over analyzing mode: on.)

💛 Despite his overly nonchalant demeanor, when he was younger he was much more alive. (It was to the point where you’d assume, even from other vampires, that he was a human.)

💛 But in the current day, it’d be the small things. He was still modest with his crushes, shockingly.

💛 That’d be the one thing his younger self and current self shared.

💛 They valued the small things. Attention to detail.

💛 Like if you remembered the band he liked, but let slip out in conversation, or noticed his change in hair product, along with the way he’d use slight makeup to accentuate his eyes, he’d adore you.

💛 When people pay attention to the smaller things that seem mundane, the things that make sense to complete a person, just like he tends to do in others,

💛 (which is the reason why he tends to get the full picture of how people are right in 5-10 minutes tops,)

💛 it secretly drives him mad. Mad with love if you get what I mean.

💛 But he’d resent this feeling. He hates it.

💛 After what happened with Edgar (Yūma)... he hasn’t yet recovered completely.

💛 If it’s serious, he’ll loathe himself and do anything and everything to get rid of that funny feeling in his chest.

💛 The one that makes him lose his breath, almost like the way he did when Edgar’s village was set aflame. Not a soul to be found.

💛 Everything seemingly goes back to Edgar with this one.

💛 It’s the subconscious fear that anything he ever shows slight interest in, would immediately be ripped away.

💛 Especially those he cares for.

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Physical Crush HC's:

💛 Realistically this would last around 2 weeks. Maybe even less.

💛 Shū’s more of the type of person to admire someone’s looks from afar. Almost like a beautiful painting of sorts.

💛 He’d get over it quickly. He is constantly surrounded by women and men alike who want his attention and practically throw themselves at him.

💛 So he’d at least by that time, find others who are attractive, even more so than the last.

💛 The one thing to differentiate from a simple acknowledgement of ‘they’re attractive’ and a settlement of ‘stuck in your head for a bit’ for Shū is the way they carry themselves. Consistently.

💛 If he were to cross their paths in the halls or in a class frequently, it’d be that one determining factor that would allow him to determine if they’re worthy prey or something to admire.

💛 It varies, but Shū can appreciate all types of beauty.

💛 The same way he can in music, he knows that everyone follows their own tune.

💛 Each individual is molded to fit their tune, their melody.

💛 So even if someone isn’t as conventionally attractive, it’s the small gestures or aura they give off.

💛 He can shockingly find even a small thing to like about people, even if he isn’t as favourable to them.

💛 Part of it is from his training to become heir.

💛 When dealing with so many people, you learn that even if they aren’t the greatest, some do have a hidden asset which makes them valuable in a sense.

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Emotional/Personality Crush HC’s:

💛 Now this… this would last quite a bit.

💛 When Shū falls, he falls hard.

💛 Much to his dismay, it’s one of his biggest weaknesses when falling in love.

💛 He has double sided feelings, however.

💛 A) To adore and cherish them, whilst ensuring he devotes himself and treats them right, despite his flaws. It’d go to the point where he’d have motivation to change for the better.

💛 B) Shut himself in and avoid them at all costs. All in the name of letting these stupid feelings go away, due to his fear of ruining everything just like he did with Edgar.

💛 He can’t have it on his conscience to be the reason for another innocent life being lost. All due to his stupidity and naivety.

💛 You bet that he’d overanalyze everything.

💛 His younger self would make a guest star appearance.

💛 If it’s really bad, you’d even see him talking to Reiji about it.

💛 That would be when Shū’d be caught off guard, lowering his walls to let Reiji in and talk about what it was that made him fall deeply in love.

💛 Queue Reiji’s annoyance.

💛 At first, he’d wonder if he should ruin another thing. But once he sees Shū’s proactivity and want to change and step up.

💛 Get this man a stool and clipboard. Because they’ll be here all night, and then some.

💛 He’d get sick and tired of listening to Shū ramble on, though.

💛 Like imagine the text messages, snaps, insta dm’s, and talking in person. (Assuming they’d use those social medias.)

💛 Reiji would wonder if this was a good idea. But part of him would be happy to have the old Shū back. Even if it’s because of someone other than him.

💛 (Semi-canon that he also wants Shū’s approval and validation. And once valued what Shū thought/wanted of him. Especially as his elder.)

💛 Reiji would have bittersweet feelings.

💛 But would be fine with it nonetheless.

💛 And if Shū had doubts or inclinations of wanting to put up all his walls again, Reiji would (shockingly) play good brother and reassure him that it’d be okay.

💛 This is assuming that Reiji likes you. Or thinks you’re a good influence on Shū and the family name (mainly Shū but he wouldn’t want to admit that he cared about Shū, or was, to a degree, over-protective of him.)

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#ask reply #diabolik lovers #diabolik lovers headcanons #dl hcs #shuu sakamaki #mentioned reiji sakamaki

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runabout-river · 30 days

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Thoughts on JJK chapter 255 (spoilers)

Fun chapter with many interesting parts.

People have wondered if Larue would also appear mostly because he had been working with Yuki at some point. That they're called Team Geto is really funny.

We get a flashback of the timeskip with Yuta and Larue recruiting Miguel to their cause. He isn't convinced at first until Larue changes his mind. Nanako and Mimiko we know were killed by Sukuna but their conversation makes it seem like the other two who had that encounter with Kusakabe and Panda also died.

Miguel says that Gojo should've come himself to get him on board. This makes it the first time that Gojo's absence from the timeskip flashbacks is acknowledged in a meta fashion. This is significant imo because this throws the doors wide open to Gojo having done sth else than train with his students for the last month.

That could be some kind of preparation or getting more allies to their side. It could even be specialized training for Nobara or something else entirely but it will come back at some point.

Sukuna: 😩

Recap to remind us that Sukuna is injured right now and that he can't use RCT. This makes it seem like the Geto Duo was somewhere else than the monitor room where the other are/were.

I also wanted to point out that Larue is the most stereotypically coded gay character in JJK. He's the kind of character that is overly masculine physically but has some over-the-top feminine characteristics like his eyes, lips and the pink hearts over his tits.

Can't wait to see Miguel breakdancing his way out of cleave animated.

Sukuna has more interest in Miguel's CT than Larue's, showing us that he still to this moment loves analyzing and optimizing Jujutsu

We get a flashback that has Gojo in it BUT that flashback is pre-Shibuya and happens after the end of the movie (a scene that wasn't in the original manga).

And Gojo was racist? Interestingly, he applied real world physical built of the average Japanese person to that of an unspecified African country saying that a physical buff for Miguel's people works better because they're physically stronger (apparently but who really knows). Except of course that thinking falls apart (in multiple ways) when we consider that we're in a battle shonen and all sorcerers are either decently or highly muscular (except the women)

We see that Miguel is, as Gege has once said, strong and he gets a few good blows against Sukuna. Choso also reappears.

We get an explanation on how Sukuna's World Cutting Slash works. He needs to use his domain seal to activate it and I'm curious what exactly that means in regards to what domain seals even are.

Against Gojo, Sukuna had lost his left hand in the Hollow Purple attack, so he shouldn't have been able to perform the WCS but he made a vow instead that stipulated that for all future uses of that cut he needs to use his palm to specify the trajectory of it.

He could've activated his transformation then instead of making the vow but he probably saw it as more important that Gojo thought that he had been defeated.

Maki came back like most people in my poll voted for. Now I'm... anxious on how Gege will write her from then on. From her chapter we got the sense that she will have a bigger role in confronting one specific aspect of Sukuna but now we're in a group battle again.

Larue got a BF though so the group will shrink really fast which should get Maki back into the spotlight.

She cuts off Sukuna's left hand making it seemingly impossible for him to use his super cut except we the audience know of course that that won't hinder him too much.

Yuji, you're so full hope that it was inevitable that it would be crushed immediately. Sukuna uses a second BF which will restore his CE output meaning he'll heal his limbs just like Gojo did at that point in their fight.

He still has his fire arrow and the corresponding technique of it in his Arsenal as well, so like Uraume said, he still hasn't gotten all out on them

I feel like the fight is going to get into its third phase in the upcoming chapters. Prepare for another 3-5 chapter mini-arc (probably the Uraume/Hakari fight) to interrupt it after something shocking will happen.

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk #sukuna #gojo satoru #miguel jjk #yuji itadori #itadori yuuji #ryomen sukuna #meta

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waitmyturtles · 8 months

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Turtles Finds a Coping Mechanism: The Until We Meet Again Rewatches

I've been so committed to crushing through the Old GMMTV Challenge that I kind of didn't allow myself to think that life's blips and bloops would shake me from my pace.

Well, real life has SLAYED ME as of late, SLAYED ME, and as @lurkingshan has noted to me -- yes, there's a CERTAIN amount of dissonance for my watching UNTIL WE MEET AGAIN, OF ALL SHOWS, as a coping mechanism, but here we are. I wanted to copy @bengiyo and rewatch UWMA anyway as a means of preparing for New Siwaj's Absolute Zero, which will be premiering at the end of September -- a time when my life will be calm-ish (???) again -- so I decided to take the plunge to see if UWMA would be a salve to my frayed nerves. It is, it totally is.

So here's some stream of consciousness notes, quite unlike my usual comparative/analytical style, just to honor what a ridiculously fabulous show UWMA is. (In my OGMMTVC analyses, I don't always get to gush over the cute stuff anyway because my posts get so long, so I'm doing a little of that here, too, ha.)

I knew that as soon as I watched it the first time for the OGMMTVC that I desperately wanted to rewatch it, so I just gave myself the go-ahead to eat the leum kleun candy. I've already completed one rewatch and am well into a second rewatch -- this show is so damn good, and now that I know the beats much better, I'm just having a lot of fun seeing in-depth the little nuances I missed the first time.

1) On my first watch, I did not appreciate how clearly Pharm was into Dean from the very start. The way Pharm flips through the photos of Dean that Team sends him from the first beach trip; the photo of Dean eating Del's breakfast; the way Pharm looks at the Facebook photo of Dean holding up the leum kleun. And how Pharm reacts when he saves Dean's phone number in his phone -- that ENORMOUS grin. I knew a lot going in the first time about Pharm's blushing maiden approach and how he was gunshy with intimacy for so much of the show. But I forgot in those early episodes -- homeboy was really into his crush! Taking that secret photo in the library, etc. He acknowledged it pretty immediately -- especially in that whispered conversation Pharm has with Team and Manaow in their English class. I had also forgotten that the show began with Pharm possibly questioning his sexuality, but being solidly knowledgable that it was Dean that was causing him to catch feelings.

2) Speaking of that fleeting moment in the library: after having watched the entire series the first time around, and remembering that Dean had saved that very first Post-It that Pharm had used to write a quick note on the papers that Pharm gave back to Dean in the library in... episode 2? Pharm had originally erased his name on that Post-It. It didn't click with me until this rewatch that Dean was able to make out Pharm's erased name from that Post-It -- which caused Dean to save the note, and use it as reference in the very last scene of the series. So cute.

3) I finally took the time to read about Phra Aphai Mani, the prince of the legend that Dean and Pharm talk about in the aquarium. Remember how Pharm says to Dean that Pharm doesn't like players?

DUDES. HAVE YOU READ ABOUT PHRA APHAI MANI? I guess, like, yes, if you're gonna have a super-long epic poem, a lot of shit needs to happen, but Aphai just kept marrying WIFE AFTER WIFE! FOUR WIVES TOTAL! One ogress, one mermaid, and two maybe humans? A half-ogress son here, a half-mer/son THERE, prince of THIS, king of THAT. Homeboy's life was COMPLICATED! I'm all EXTREMELY SYMPATHETIC to chaos, but this takes the damn cake. (And maybe gives me a touch more context into what's happening with that second marriage in I Feel You Linger In the Air, without the actual monsters/mermaids.) (Oh man -- imagine the Only Friends version of Phra Aphai Mani.) (NO.)

4) The first time around, I kind of though that the bits about Alex hitting on Pharm were a little extraneous and maybe a touch unnecessary, à la New Siwaj's style. But after my first rewatch, I stopped thinking so, and I actually began to enjoy them -- not only for how ridiculous they are, but I also recognized that that was the first time in the show that we see Pharm establishing boundaries. Of course, we see Pharm in his blushing maiden era forming boundaries with his P'Deeeean. But the way he's very clear with Alex, putting up as many walls as necessarily, and being exact in his communication that he likes someone else and is VERY not into dating Alex -- Pharm showed clarity and strength there. While Dean clearly liked to care for Pharm and treat Pharm as his younger companion -- Pharm also had agency, and knew he owned his agency, and I liked how that agency was first demonstrated vis à vis Alex.

5) I totally forgot about this, but -- I think it was the second time they had breakfast together in Pharm's condo? the third? that scene where Pharm's wearing the yellow shirt and he drops the bowl -- remember when Pharm asks Dean if he's mixed-race? I don't think I still understand the meaning of that. I'm guessing Pharm is asking if Dean is Thai-Chinese? I want to think on this more, because -- in episode 16, when Pharm goes to his uncle's/grandpa's house, it is clear that the house is a Thai-Chinese household. There are banners with Chinese script on the walls. I wonder if that was meant to indicate that Pharm was under the impression that he himself (Pharm) was fully ethnic Thai -- but with his relationship to his dad's side of the family being more revealed, it would turn out that Pharm himself was also "mixed." I did think it was cute that Pharm said, "I like it" to Dean after Dean's answer -- another instance where Pharm was being clearly flirty, despite the whole blushing maiden thing.

6) I did not appreciate the first time around, how good Ohm Thitiwat's acting was in the car scene when he's processing Korn's suicide. At the end of the series, I was so taken by the condo scene that I failed to give props to other intense moments, and that car scene was one of them. When Dean arrives at the building where Pharm and Sin lived next to each other -- a part of me wondered if he had originally intended to visit Sin, before hesitating to knock on Pharm's door. I'm not sure, and I wasn't sure after this rewatch. But that was a hell of a recognition moment on the part of Ohm's acting, and it was really damn good. (In fact -- it was my thinking about that car scene, and my wanting to watch it again, that prompted these rewatches in the first place.)

7) It may have been a little confusing, but: I really liked that the Korn x Intouch flashbacks were never presented in chronological order. I liked that the show had Dean and Pharm piece together their dreams and nightmares to come to a collective understanding about the trajectory of Korn and Intouch's relationship, even before Dean receives the background information from Sin. I know I was always a little confused during my first watch as to what moment in time I was watching with Korn and Intouch, but I recognize now that that was a reflection simply of when Pharm and Dean were receiving the same information themselves -- and I liked that the viewer was going through the same process that Dean and Pharm were going through.

8) At the way beginning of the series -- episode 2, maybe? episode 3? -- I like that Dean slyly figures out where to park himself on campus to see Pharm coming out of class. This is before the electric transformer explosion. Dean already was so swayed by Pharm. So cute.

9) I think it first struck me as a touch weird that Manaow and Del (Dean's sister!) were the admins of the DeanPharm chat group. But now that I can think more about it -- I wonder if they were doing that maybe as a way to help Pharm through his hesitancy and protect him from the fans. That being said: one of my absolute favorite moments was when Del first leans about Dean's first sleepover at Pharm's condo -- the way she jumps up and down and tries to calm her smile down. I was CRAAACKING up.

10) Maybe it's because I'm Indian, and used to very large and complicated families, that the relationship between Dean being a part of Intouch's family and having Korn's spirit, and vice versa with Pharm, wasn't confusing to me. But what really got me during my first rewatch was: Fluke Natouch's just INCREDIBLE acting when Pharm first meets Intouch's sister/Dean's grandmother, and Intouch's niece/Dean's mother. When I first watched the scene of Pharm meeting Dean's grandmother, a number of friends commented on loving that scene as well. GOD. It struck me as hard the second time around as the first time. And I think I was even MORE moved the second time around to see Pharm meeting Dean's mother.

Dean's mother had to process a LOT in the moment that she met Pharm. She had to process that her son had a boyfriend, that that boyfriend was there in her house in the first place, and that she'd have to tell her husband (Dean's dad) that their son's boyfriend was sleeping over. AND, that was all BEFORE Pharm had his reaction to Dean's mom once he was finally awake and processing things again. And THEN, she knew that Dean HIMSELF would have to tell his dad the next day and ask for his blessing. Moms have to go through a lot (do I ever know that life), but that was a LOT for Dean's mom, and god, I just gained a new appreciation for those scenes and how Dean and Pharm managed the whole damn thing together. (Also, now that I've seen The Love of Siam, as well as, of course, KinnPorsche -- and, OH, Be My Favorite, too! Kob Songsit. LEGENDARY BL DAD!)

11) My initial flip-out on the condo scene still stands. During my rewatch, I rewound it, like... three times? Fuck, man. One of the BEST BL scenes, ever, ever.

12) I loved taking my time to watch the very final scene, when Dean and Pharm have had the same dream of Korn and Intouch thanking them, and they get back together. I really loved paying attention to how all the Post-Its came back, the meaning of Never Forget, all the little notes and memories of when they had first met. Intouch's ring, the very first note Pharm wrote to Dean, all of it. Dean was such a sentimental simp from the start.

(Because I'm on such a DeanPharm kick -- and I know this is against better advice, but -- I'm considering a fast watch of Between Us just to see DeanPharm's conclusion. I know! The side couples are supposed to be chaotic, but, but. Once I get more time.)

13) Last note. Again, when I have time again, I'm wanting to write a Big Meta on separation. I've noted in some of the most important GMMTV BLs, that separation is often a key theme. But I think Pharm asking for a break was also incredibly key, and keyed into his continued commitment to setting boundaries. I think I probably fell most for Pharm as a character with him doing this -- strange, I know, since I love DeanPharm incessantly, but his standing up for clarity for his feelings meant so much for the internal strength he had gained by surviving the ordeal they had gone through. He was going to stick to his guns to make sure the relationship was authentic FOR HIM, and he did just that.

GOD, THIS WAS CATHARTIC! If you read this, thanks for going through this with me! I'm addicted to writing and this was a fun break in the midst of life chaos. I promise the OGMMTVC will hopefully continue without interruption, but that being said -- I'm watching Not Me, slowly, and having a great time with it. But UWMA is my woobie at the moment, and I just love having fallen in love with this show.

#until we meet again #uwma #until we meet again meta #uwma meta #uwma rewatch #deanpharm #fluke natouch #ohm thitiwat #new siwaj

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royaltyofmultifandom · 2 years

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Echo - Leigh Shaw x Reader

Summary: Y/n admits her true feelings to Leigh for her to get denied. What happens when Leigh keeps pulling Y/n in to only push her away again? Will Y/n keep coming back or will she finally leave for good?

Warnings: swearing, alcohol, smut, 18+ (MINORS DO NOT INTERACT) , drunkLeigh!, angst.

Words:

A/n: This idea kept popping up in my head so I had to write it. It was inspired by the song “Echo” by Alexander Stewart. I hope you enjoy this oneshot and as always any likes, reblogs and comments mean a lot. Also shoot me a message if you would like to be tagged in any of my works or tagged for a specific character :) enjoy!

MASTERLIST // Join my Taglist!

You first met Leigh outside of her grief group in the parking lot. Your sister was the grief counsellor for the group and you would always stop by to help hand out refreshments if you had the chance.

You remember the day Leigh Shaw finally talked to you as if it were yesterday. You had seen Leigh coming to grief group for over a year now and the therapist in you saw something in her. Over time you started to grow a crush on the woman and loved how blunt and straightforward she was; you never ever considered that one day that bluntness would hurt you more than anything else in this world.

Leigh had stayed behind a little to help your sister and you clean up. Once everything was almost done Leigh decided to call it a night mumbling a goodnight to the both of you. You had noticed she seemed more down than usual, so you spotted the extra doughnuts left over from today’s session and grabbed the box and ran out after her.

“Hey, Leigh. Can you wait up for a second” you yelled after her. Leigh stopped and turned around to face you and you felt your heart rate increase against your chest as her sage green eyes, with a blank look, stared into your own. Leigh’s brows furrowed eyebrows as she tilted to the side slightly as she wondered why you were chasing after her.

You jogged the rest of the way up to Leigh and held out the box of doughnuts while smiling widely at her as she frowned, looking down at the box of doughnuts. You caught on to her further confusion immediately.

“Oh, my sister had some of these left over and we weren’t going to eat them. You seemed a little more down in today’s session than usual and I noticed how much you love doughnuts. I thought you could use an extra pick me-up or you know, if you don’t want a pity gift then you could consider them as a thank you gift, for helping my sister and I clear up tonight” you ramble. You start scratching the back of your neck as you avoid all eye contact with her, knowing that if you did your heart might just beat out of your chest or stop completely.

“Thank you, uhm, sorry, I don’t know your name” Leigh apologises as you catch the guilty look flash across her face briefly.

“That's okay, and my name is Y/n L/n. My sister runs your grief group” you explain as Leigh nods in acknowledgement.

“Right, yeah, of course. Well Y/n L/n, it was very nice to meet you and thanks again for the doughnuts. Maybe I could see you again sometime? Outside of the grief group, maybe we could grab some coffee together one day?” Leigh proposes.

“I’d really like that, Leigh, hang on I’ll enter my number into your phone if you’d like” you suggest. Leigh flashes you a smile, the first one you’d seen off her all night, as she passes you her phone. You input your number and hand it back to her before walking Leigh to her car and watching her drive off.

Leigh texted you three days after and invited you out for coffee and that was where a beautiful friendship began. You and Leigh spent nearly everyday together for three months and your crush on Leigh only developed further until you fell completely in love with her.

Over time, as the two of you kept growing closer physically, you ended up sleeping together one night. Since that first time it became a recurring event that whenever Leigh needed you, you would be there and the two of you would have sex.

That’s what leads you to where you are right now watching her grab the rest of her clothes and walk out of your apartment without so much as a word.

**************************************

“Fuck y/n. Right th-there” Leigh moans echo your bedroom, her hips thrusting uncontrollably at the pace you’ve set with your strap.

You are completely mesmerised as you stare at the way her breasts bounce as she rides you. You bite your lip to silence yourself from groaning whilst focusing on her perky breasts and erect nipples “fuck Leigh, you are so fucking perfect. Come on baby, that's it; you can do it. Fuck yourself on my cock baby” you purr.

You thrust your hips up off the mattress as hard and as fast as you can as Leigh rides you. You place the soles of your feet flat so that you can thrust at a quicker pace and deeper into her pussy. Her head tilts back in ecstasy as she slides her hands up your torso and lands on your breasts to anchor her as she lifts her hips, sinking back down on your strap, taking the full length of the toy.

You caress her hips before gripping them a little tighter and guide her as she rides you. Pulling her hips down against you whilst you thrust into her as she runs her hands across your chest exploring the shape of your breasts, almost like she wishes to commit the feeling of them to memory.

“Fuck y/n, I’m going to cum baby” she moans as her hips speed up, chasing her high, but you have other ideas.

You lean up so you are sitting as Leigh still bucks against the strap buried within her. You bring your lips to her nipple and run your tongue over it before taking her nipple in your mouth and softly sucking and biting on it before letting it go. You move on to her other breast once again taking her nipple in your mouth as you knead the other one. You can hear Leigh’s ragged breaths as she struggles to reach the orgasm she is so desperately chasing. “Y/n baby please, I need you” she pleads.

You place a kiss just under her breast and bite the skin before soothing it over with your tongue. You pull away at her desperate pleas “need me to help you baby?” you coo into her ear. She shudders, nodding, as your breath tickles her ears just adding to her overwhelming need to cum.

Leigh nods frantically “please make me cum” she whimpers, her body becoming tired as she grinds harshly against your strap showing you how desperate she is.

“Okay baby I’ve got you” you shush her.

In one quick motion you flip her so that she is on her back and she instantly wraps her legs around your waist allowing you better access to her pussy. You pull your strap out of her until only the tip is inside her. Leigh whimpers at the temporary loss. You lean down and start kissing her lips before moving your kisses down her jaw until you reach the sweet spot on her neck. You thrust your entire length into her entrance until you bottom out just as you bite down on the sweet spot on her neck, smoothing the bite over with your tongue. Leigh’s entire body arches reactively into you as she lets out the most perfectly sinful moans which echo the bedroom walls.

You continue the thrusting into her deeply and hard whilst leaving kisses down her neck, collarbone and breasts, gently nipping her and leaving bites every so often. Leigh bucks hard against you as she runs her fingers up your arms and along your back as she digs her nails into your back to ground herself at the brutal pace you have set.

“Y/n I’m go-gonna cum, fuck y/n” she moans loudly as her walls clench against the strap as her hips and body jerk as she cums hard all over your strap. You continue thrusting into her softly until the last wave of her orgasm has washed over her. You smile at her and kiss her lips and then her forehead before pulling out of her as she whimpers slightly.

You remove the strap and throw it across the room to deal with later as you crawl up the bed and collapse next to Leigh. You place a soft kiss on her temple “you okay?” You ask, passing her some water that she politely declines. You go to wrap your arms around her and pull her into you to cuddle, but she has already leaped from the bed and began getting dressed.

This is what she always does after the two of you have sex. She gets dressed as soon as you have made her cum, leaves, doesn’t talk to you or answer your messages and calls for two weeks, calls you up to hang out, saying that she misses you and the cycle repeats itself.

Every time you try to even remotely bring up the subject of her staying after having sex, she just yells and it always ends in an argument. You keep trying, hoping that each outcome will be different, but they all end the same; her leaving.

You jump up and start getting dressed too, but this only speeds up her process as she opens the bedroom door. You run over to her and slam the door shut with your hand and gently spin her around to face you, but she refuses to look into your eyes. You bend your knees slightly as you cup her cheek, softly, rubbing your thumb over the apples of her cheeks, trying to catch her eyes with yours.

“Leigh please, don’t do this again. Okay? Just please don’t leave like you always do” you plead with her.

Leigh looks up and meets your eyes “I can’t do this, Y/n, this was a mistake. I was lonely and…” “and I was just there. I get it, Leigh. I know the whole script like the back of my hand at this point. At least you’re consistent. I’ll give you that” you cut her off sadly, finishing the same speech she always provides.

“Y/n, that’s not fair” she mumbles trying to reach out for you just so she can offer a few soft touches to pacify you before leaving just like she intended to do in the first place anyway.

“No, you know what’s not fair, Leigh? I am in love with you and have been since we met and you know this and yet you still sleep with me, leave, don’t talk to me for weeks and then repeat the cycle. You know this and you refuse to admit you feel the same way because you’re scared. I get it, Leigh. I do. You’re scared that if you let me in entirely and let yourself feel the feelings you have for me, that you’ll lose me, but I’m still here.

We do the same dance every time Leigh. You kiss me and I kiss you back; we end up sleeping together, and then you tell me it’s a mistake. But it’s not a mistake, and you know it. You know, deep down you have feelings for me too, but you won’t admit them because you’re so scared I’m gonna leave you just like Matt did or that you’re betraying him.. But I’m not going anywhere, Leigh. I am right here. I am always right here where you leave me. I tried to go slow because I thought that’s what you needed. Matt would want you to be happy and move on. I’m not going to leave you like Matt did, Leigh” you sigh, letting all your thoughts out.

Leigh glares at you before stepping forward so she can finally look you deep in the eyes “you know what I’m sick of, Y/n? You psychoanalysing me all the fucking time. You may be a therapist, but I am not one of your fucking patients, and your stupid therapy methods don’t work on me, so stop treating me like one. I don’t need you to be patient with me or tell me you aren’t going to leave me like Matt; instead you should keep my husband’s name out of your mouth. Don’t you get it? I don’t want to be with you. You’re so desperate god, you’re just a good fuck every so often” she yells exasperatedly as she throws her hands up before they come crashing back down against her thighs.

You step back as you feel a pang of hurt in your chest as if someone had just punched you in the gut. You feel the tears start to come to form in your eyes as her mossy green eyes convey nothing but anger towards you. You decide you won’t let her see how much she hurt you, so instead you swallow the lump in your throat and push down the tears.

“Fine, you know what Leigh, fine. I’m done doing this with you. From now on, don’t contact me. I am done trying to make this work. If you are afraid of your feelings then fine, but excuse me if I don’t stick around for you just to insult me and treat me like a punching bag. I refuse to let you drag me down with you. I need to distance myself from you for a while because it hurts too much to be around you anymore” you croak as your emotions become too much.

Something snaps in Leigh when she realises what is happening and her eyes shine with panic, her wide eyes glistening with unshed tears, which then soften as she attempts to reach out for you once more to try and console you. You step back away from her shaking your head as you shrug her off, leading her to the front door as you hold it wide open.

“Y/n please I didn’t mean what I said” she apologises, her eyes pleading you not to do this.

You continue to hold the door open and look down at the ground, avoiding her eyes “bye Leigh” you mumble. Leigh’s tears escape her eyes as she comes to the realisation that she really fucked up this time and wipes them away with the palm of her hand as they fall. She tries to catch your eye once more but gives up knowing you have made up your mind and steps out your apartment door, nearly hitting her on the way out.

As soon as the door is closed you let yourself break down and slide down the door in pain as you feel your heart break, the echo of her voice still in your head.

Little do you know, Leigh is breaking down in her own car as she replays the conversation over and over knowing every single thing you said was right. It takes Leigh a good hour before she can compose herself enough to drive home, but as she does her heart feels shattered.

******************************

You wake up to the vibrations your phone is making as its screen lights up the room from your bedside table. You let out a groan, cursing whoever is calling you in the middle of the night, and reach over blindly to answer the phone without bothering to check the caller ID.

“Hello” you answer groggily as you try to rub the sleep out of your eyes as you struggle to keep them from drooping shut again.

“Y/n baby. I-I am so s-sorry. I can’t stop thinking about you, please ignore…..forgive me. I-I need you baby…I need you close to me a-all the time. I fucked up…god I fucked up baby, I ne-want you close to me” Leigh's slurred voice comes through your phone.

Starting to wake up you hear by her hiccuping and slurred dialogue that she is drunk somewhere. You sigh, this happens a lot.

Leigh blows up at you and pushes you away and then she ends up at some nightclub or bar drunk and phones you apologising and you fall back into her arms every time.

“Where are you? I’m picking you up” you insist. You start to slowly lose your patience like you always do when she keeps slurring her words and not forming any coherent sentences.

Eventually, after fifteen minutes of softly demanding that Leigh give her phone to a bartender do you find out where she is. The bartender informs you that he will keep her safe and cut her off until you arrive to take her home.

Leigh begins to get upset and sniffles when you tell her you have to hang up so you can drive to her.

“Leigh please baby. I need to hang up so I can come meet you at the bar, I’m coming so you need to hang up. The sooner you hang up the sooner I’ll be there” you bargain with her. Eventually, she relents and makes you promise that you’ll be there soon which of course you do.

After quickly flinging on some sweatpants and a sweatshirt, you grab your phone and keys and set off to retrieve Leigh. The whole drive all you can hear is the echo of a combination of different fights you’ve had with Leigh along with all her moans and bursts of laughter. You can’t help thinking that you can’t keep doing this anymore if she refuses to give you even a little reassurance apart from drunk calls that she feels the same way as you do.

Eventually, you find Leigh at the bar sipping on some water. You head over to her and wrap your arms around her waist and you can’t help but feel elated when you see the way her sad face lights up with adoration when she sees you.

“Y/n” she sighs contentedly as she allows her head to lull back against your shoulder allowing the alcohol to fully possess her. You sigh and shake your head when you realise she’s passed out in a drunken state. You thank the bartender and grab her in a bridal hold and take her out to the passenger side of your car. You gently place her in the seat and buckle her seatbelt before gently shutting the door. You then climb in the driver’s seat and drive her back to her apartment.

You pick up her handbag that she had at the bar and rummage for her keys. Once found, you get out of the car and open her apartment door before racing back to the car to gently lift her out. Once in your arms Leigh wraps her arms around your neck subconsciously and snuggles into you chest sighing in her sleep. You shut the car door and lock it before making your way up the stairs and into her apartment, kicking the door shut behind you.

You place Leigh gently on her bed and take her dress off before tucking her under the covers and rolling on her side to ensure she doesn’t choke if she’s sick during the night. You then head into her kitchen and grab a tall glass of water and some tablets for her head, that she will no doubt require in the morning, and place them on her bedside table.

You kneel beside her and brush the hair away from her eyes and mouth as you gaze at her peacefully sleeping with the occasional soft snore falling past her lips. You think it’s adorable and only find yourself wishing that you could wake up to her at least once.

As much as you are in love with Leigh, you know things will never change. Leigh will go back to wanting to spend everyday with you and as soon as the two of you sleep together again she’ll be gone.

You can’t keep holding on to hope that she might change or hold on to the echo of her anymore.You sigh defeated and place a soft kiss to her forehead before grabbing the blanket on the couch and settling down on it to try to get some sleep.

**************************

When Leigh wakes in the morning a rush of pain hits her forehead and makes her dizzy. Disorientated, she attempts to piece her night together. One minute she was thinking of calling Y/n to apologise in the bar and then everything goes blank. Leigh brings her gaze down and notices she is just in her underwear and her dress is on her chair in the corner of her room. When she glances to the left she sees a glass of water and some tablets on her bedside table.

How the hell did she get home?

She groans as she sits on the edge of her bed at the throbbing in her temples. She takes the tablets and gulps the water down before gathering the courage to get up to retrieve another glass for her dry throat.

Leigh stops in her tracks as she enters into her kitchen and sees you lying passed out on the sofa. So that’s how she got home, she pieces it together and groans internally when the flashbacks of her calling Y/n drunk come to the forefront of her mind. Leigh smiles at how soft and peaceful you look as you sleep and decides to make some coffee to thank you.

She doesn’t deserve you, not after the way she treated you. She acknowledges this but still can’t help but to feel excited that you came to her rescue last night. Surely that means you still care right?

***************************

You wake up to the strong smell of freshly brewed coffee and your stomach rumbling. Groaning and stretching you wake yourself up and blink the sleep out of your eyes as they adjust to the light flooding through Leigh’s living room windows.

“Hey, sleepy head” you hear Leigh softly greet you good morning. You mumble a non-coherent good morning as you sit up and accept the mug of coffee she made for you.

Leigh sits next to you and pulls her legs up to her chest as she cradles her cup of coffee in both hands. You take a sip of your coffee and look over to see her looking at you intently.

“Can we talk?” she questions nervously. You nod but stay silent allowing her to speak first.

“I am so sorry Y/n. I know I keep apologising and you don’t deserve that but I need you to know that I never meant a single thing I said that night. I just snapped because every single thing you said was true, I am scared of losing you. Scared of moving on from Matt. I know about your feelings towards me and I have always been aware of them and I’ve not been fair to you. I do love you Y/n, I am in love with you.

I wish I could take everything I’ve done back and just have stayed with you that night believe me but I can’t. All I can do is promise it will never happen again Y/n, I love you. You aren’t just a good fuck, you’re everything to me and I know I have done nothing to make you believe that. Please baby, just give me one more chance. I’ll do anything. Please baby, just let me love you the way you deserve to be loved, to love you the way you love me” she pleads with unshed tears in her eyes.

You sigh, shaking your head as you stand up, placing your mug on the coffee table.

“I can’t Leigh, I’m sorry. I love you but it's just too late” you conclude as your bottom lip trembles at the threat of spilling all your own unshed tears.

Leigh shoots up and places her coffee down and rushes to your side and brings both her hands to your cheeks, wiping away the tears that have fallen. She lifts your face so that your eyes meet hers and you see the pain in her eyes.

“Please baby, it's not too late. I love you just give me a chance” she desperately sobs letting her own tears hit her cheeks, soothingly rubbing her thumbs against the apples of your cheeks.

You reach up and take her hands in yours and you see a glimpse of hope flicker in her hopeful eyes before you lower her hands away from your face.

“You haven’t taken responsibility for holding my heart the way you do. You have known this whole time I have worn mine on my sleeve Leigh so, what else can you expect me to do? If you don’t end it when this is over then you leave me lonely and brokenhearted. Cause everytime you leave me you break me slowly and you’re not there afterwards but you still have a hold on me” you croak.

Leigh tries to reach out for you but you take a step back as she begins to sob begging you to stay, her heart breaking every time you step out of her reach. Is this how she left you every time? Her heart feels like it is slowly shattering and she begins to understand your words.

“If you don’t stop calling, then I can’t let go when you’re drunk and telling me that you need me close. Cause I will come running back to you everytime Leigh but I don’t think my heart can take this cycle we have anymore. Please baby, don’t keep me haunted by your ghost because when you leave me all I hear your echo in my mind constantly” you sob pleading for her to let you go as she is pleading for you to give her one more chance.

“I keep holding on to the possibility that you and I can turn into us. But when that hope turns into dust it's worse than a death of a thousand cuts. So please, can you end it when it’s over?” Leigh shakes her head in denial at your plea.

“No baby, I am sorry but I can’t. I want you and you want me just let me make this right I’ll do anything baby, plea-please don’t leave me” her voice catches in between her uncontrollable sobs as she protests and your heart breaks even more than it already has at letting her go. This was all you wanted but you can’t take the chance of her changing her mind again because you won’t survive this time. You hold her tight against your chest and kiss the crown of her head as your tears fall into her hair and you battle with the lump in your throat and pain coursing through your chest.

“Your echo is in my mind, my body and in my heart every time you leave me Leigh and I won’t survive another. I lay in bed in a wreck trying to forget the echos of every argument after sex, the speech you give me everytime, I can’t do it again baby. You have to let me go” you pull her away from your chest and really look at her trying to convey how desperate you are for her to end your suffering. You love her of course you do. Your eyes fill with new tears and the pang of hurt hits your chest and gut once more at the thought of leaving her but you have to and deep down so does she.

You cup her face in your hands and graze your thumbs over her lips and cheeks and place your forehead against hers “If you don’t stop calling, then I can’t let go. All I hear is your echo. Please baby, don’t keep me haunted by your ghost. Let me go” you completely break and sob with her.

You both know at that moment it’s over and god it hurts.

You place a kiss to her forehead and let it linger there for what feels like eternity before pulling away and heading towards the door.

Leigh catches your hand, her lip trembling as another shot of pain shoots through her chest as fresh tears drop from her eyelids.

“I love you baby, maybe one day I’ll stop being an echo and bring you peace and love instead. Maybe one day we’ll be together. I’ll always hold on to that hope Y/n but I understand why you can’t. I can’t be your echo anymore and I love you enough to let you be happy and move on without me” she sniffs.

You squeeze her hand one last time “maybe one day” you mumble back before letting go of her hand and walking out her door for the last time.

Leaving Leigh alone once again just like Matt.

Taglist: @chelleztjs18, @aboredastronomer, @bizarrealex , @lizzieolsen89, @natashasilverfox , @meshuganna, @serdiec660, @morinfoxixippy, @when-wolves-howl , @olsensnpm , @annalestern , @kacka84 , @sawsees , @gucchi17 , @serdiec660

#leigh shaw #sorry for your loss #leigh shaw reader #leigh shaw x reader #elizabeth olsen #elizabeth olsen imagine #elizabeth olsen x reader #leigh shaw imagine #leigh shaw x you #elizabeth olsen x you #elizabeth olsen fanfic #elizabeth olsen fanfiction

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ellaenchanting · 1 year

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On Big Clangy Emotions and the Lack of Guidebooks

This came up in another context tonight so I thought I would write it all out.

When I was 18 I fell for a girl. Hard. I had experienced really strong friendship with girls before but none quite like THIS. I didn't understand what was happening. Queer representation was so rare in media and in my small town experience that I didn't have the mental framework to put together "crush" or "love" from what was happening. I just knew I felt really really intensely - wanted to be with her all the time, thought of her constantly, would make up all sorts of excuses to fall asleep on her dorm floor, etc. I thought of it as a really strong, soul bonded friendship. I didn't know what else to consider. I didn't really know how to manage something so unexpected and strong and unnamed. I didn't know how to have good boundaries, how to talk about it, how to avoid being creepy. I really tried to manage myself and my feelings but- at a weak point I kissed her. All hell broke loose. She dropped out of college the next day. All of our mutual friends soon stopped talking to me.

I haven't seen her since.

I don't know if knowing more about myself or more about what queerness could look like would have stopped any of that from happening. Maybe everything would have happened the same way regardless. I think of her occasionally and there's still pain there- like a tiny hook in my heart. A hook from a girl I haven't seen in over 20 years. A hook from a girl who is largely a made up facimile in my head by now. A girl who I hope never thinks of me. She never wanted there to be a hook and, if she knew about it, she definitely wouldn't want me to have it anymore. I try and wish her well when I think of her- imagine that she's happy and doing well.

I've been hooked a few times in doing kink. Mostly, like with the long ago girl, because I wasn't expecting it and didn't have a framework to really acknowledge or discuss what was happening- to know what to watch out for in myself. Also like with the college girl, it's happened entirely with people who didn't mean to hook me- people who meant kindly and would take their hooks back immediately if that were in their power. People who couldn't have known I'd react so strongly because I couldn't have known I'd react so strongly. You can only know that from experience.

Part of having a weird and unconventional sexuality is having to figure this kind of stuff out way later than everyone else. Most people have their first big love (and the girl still feels like love to me) before they're 18. Even if they don't, there's tons of movies/culture/advice showing you what it's supposed to look like and how it's supposed to go. Most people have a really strong sexual component to those feelings that helps guide then- or push then- into knowing how they feel quickly and less ambiguously than my weird gray-aceiness whateveritis sometimes allows. Most people aren't finding new and expansive parts of their sexuality in their late 30s and 40s- tripping up over the same things that, if they were more normal, they might have been experiencing and learning to cope with when they were teenagers.

Through some bumps and bruises, I feel like I have a working model for what a healthy, casual kinky relationship looks like for me now - what boundaries work, what unspoken expectations are normal, what words apply only in context, etc. I wish I could pass that wisdom on to new kinky people- provide rules and boundaries and goal posts- but I don't know how because what I had to learn feels so individual. I can talk about mirror neurons and rapport and the potential love spell of looking too long into someone else's eyes and I know all of the things that are universal but - on some deep, unconscious level they still feel like a traps that only I will fall into.

I guess now I'm just better at choosing my traps- and controlling how fast and how far I fall. Being caught can be really exciting when you're prepared for it- and you've learned how to catch yourself if need be.

I don't know if any of you out there can relate. If you can, I hope reading this brings you some comfort. I hope writing it does that for me.

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maysileeewrites · 2 years

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it’s where my demons hide || Anakin Skywalker Imagine Part I

Summary: The reader comforts Anakin after he has a nightmare.

AN: This is my first time writing for Anakin, so I hope that I did him justice! Also, this turned out way more angsty than I’d originally intended, but I quite like it. Feel free to tell me what you think :)

I have a masterlist :)

Gif not mine.

You knew that something was wrong when you woke up.

You didn’t need to stretch out your arm to know that the other side of the bed was empty.

Another nightmare, you were sure of it.

You closed your eyes, trying to ignore the knot of anxiety forming in your stomach. Something was wrong with Anakin, no matter how hard he tried to convince you that he was fine, just a bit stressed from all of his war missions.

At first, you’d let it slide, thinking that maybe he really was just stressed out from all of his missions and just needed a bit of rest. But this was the third night in a row that you’d woken up with the other side of the bed cold and empty.

You couldn’t deny it any longer: Anakin was pulling away from you emotionally, shutting you out - ‚dealing‘ with his problems by swallowing them up inside. You couldn’t help your frustrated sigh as you got out of bed and put on a robe over your thin nightdress. Sometimes you really felt as if Anakin would never let his guard down around you completely, would never allow himself to be completely vulnerable around you.

The thought left you feeling helpless and frustrated. No matter how much you wanted to help Anakin, in the end all you could do was show him that you loved him and were there for him, you couldn’t force him to talk to you.

You already had an idea of where you might find him when you left Anakin’s bedroom - and sure enough, there he was standing on the balcony, looking out at Coruscant, seemingly not bothered by the cold night-air, even though he was wearing nothing more than his sleep pants.

Even though he could sense you with the force and must have heard you approach, he didn’t acknowledge your presence, keeping his gaze fixed on the buildings of Coruscant.

„Ani?“, you called out, but he didn’t answer.

You still weren’t entirely sure on how to best deal with his darker moods, but you knew that you couldn’t just leave him standing there, alone with his thoughts. So you took a tentative step forward, shivering.

„Anakin, I know that something’s bothering you, and I know that you probably don’t want to talk about it, but I’m worried - „

„Just go back to sleep, Y/N“, he said coldly, still not turning around.

„No“, you said stubbornly, „I’m worried about you and I won’t have you shutting me out again -

„Just go back inside, I’m not in the mood for one of your heart-to-hearts right now!“, Anakin snapped. You did your best to ignore the bite in his voice - which you’d seldom heard directed at you - and crossed the rest of the distance between you, until you were standing directly behind him.

„I’m not going back inside until you tell me what’s wrong!“, you insisted. „I know that you’ve been having nightmares again, and I - I just want to help - „

„I said that I don’t want to talk about it!“

You knew then that you wouldn’t get through to Anakin with words, so you did the only thing you could think of and wrapped your arms around him from behind. Anakin stiffened, and for a moment you worried that he was going to push you away, but then he relaxed into the embrace, and brought up his hands to interlace your fingers with his.

For a moment you just stood there, just holding each other.

„I’m sorry, I - I didn’t mean to snap at you like that“, Anakin said and suddenly, all of the anger and pain were gone from his voice and he just sounded exhausted.

„It’s okay - „

„No, it’s not“, he said and turned around. Your heart broke upon seeing the pained and exhausted expression on his face and you immediately wrapped your arms around him again. Anakin wrapped his arms around your waist, too, pulling you flush against his body. He was almost crushing you in his embrace, but you didn’t care. All you cared about was helping Anakin overcome whatever demons had had him in their grip these past few days.

„It’s just - I’ve been having all these nightmares lately and - „, he stopped, and with a new lurch of worry you noticed that he was actually shaking. You willed yourself to stay calm - well, as calm as you could when your heart was breaking for the man in your arms.

„And? Ani, you can talk to me, I’m here“, you prompted carefully, afraid of pushing him too far. Even though it sometimes infuriated you, in the time you’d been with him you’d learned that Anakin would only talk when he was ready to. You’d had to learn the hard way that pushing him too far only resulted in him shutting you out.

In a way, you understood where he was coming from. He was the Chosen One, known as the Hero With No Fear. As a Jedi, he was supposed to follow the code, and technically, he wasn’t allowed to form any kind of attachment.

„I didn’t want to tell you - I didn’t want to worry you, but I can’t lose you too, Y/N!“, Anakin said and now it wasn’t only the cold night air that was making you shiver.

I can’t lose you, too. Lose you, too.

Too.

So Anakin was having nightmares about you dying, just like he’d had nightmares of his mother - before she’d died. You pushed down the new fear these words had ignited in you and tried to concentrate on Anakin’s shaking hands on your back instead.

Carefully, you reached your hands up to his neck and stroked through his curls, trying to calm him down. You wanted to tell him that they were just dreams and that they didn’t have to mean anything, but you knew that this would be the wrong thing to say.

„Anakin, I love you“, you said, trying to keep your voice steady, „and I’m not going anywhere. I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere, and nothing is going to change that.“

„But - „

„Ani, look at me.“ You waited until his blue eyes found yours until you told him: „I’m here - and I’m going to stay here. We’ve got a lifetime of me annoying you every single day ahead of us.“ Your attempt at humor had the desired effect - he smiled, albeit weakly.

„You don’t annoy me, Y/N“, he said, reaching up one hand to tuck a stray strand of hair back behind your ear.

„Oh really?“, you asked, cocking an eyebrow. „We’ll talk about that again tomorrow, after you’ve complained that I take too long in the shower or that I’m not arranging your bedsheets in the right way or that I don’t make pancakes the way they’re supposed to be.“

At this, Anakin actually laughed and the sound was like music to your ears.

„You don’t annoy me, Y/N“, Anakin repeated, looking at you intently. „I love you - even though you really do take way too long in the shower.“

„Hey!“, you shoved him playfully.

Anakin laughed lightly, but you could still see the dark shadows in his eyes. You untangled one hand from his hair and lightly trailed over the scar on the left side of his face with your fingertips, before cupping his cheek in your hand.

„I’m not going anywhere, okay?“, you said.

„I won’t let anything happen to you“, Anakin promised with a grim smile and his grip on your waist tightened.

„Nothing’s going to happen“, you said. „Besides, I may not be a Jedi, but I’m more than capable of holding my ground.“

Anakin furrowed his eyebrows at your words. „I’d say that you’re still far too much of a magnet for trouble, but - „

„Oh, shut up“, you said, silencing him by leaning forward and pressing your lips to his. You could feel Anakin smiling into the kiss and gripped his shoulders to steady you against the onslaught of emotions that rolled over you. You loved Anakin Skywalker so much, it sometimes scared you just how much you cared for him.

And having to see him so stressed and exhausted these last few days had worried you to the point of having physical effects on you, like the ball of anxious nerves in your stomach that was slowly unraveling.

All of these thoughts were forgotten though, when you felt Anakin tangle a hand in your hair, drawing you closer to him. Your lips moved against each other and soon you could feel his tongue probing at your entrance. You opened your mouth, granting him access. Anakin sighed into the kiss, moving his flesh hand from your waist upwards.

Soon, you were shivering from more things than just the cold, and you tightened your grip on Anakin’s hair even more. He didn’t seem to mind, continuing to draw his hand upward, lightly cupping your breast through your nightgown, until his fingertips grazed the spot on your collarbone that he loved to press kisses upon.

Suddenly, he broke away from you, looking at you with a concerned expression in his sky-blue eyes.

„Ani, what - „

„You’re shivering“, he said, sounding almost accusatory. „You’ve got goosebumps all over“, he added, shifting his attention to your arms. The sleeves of your robe had ridden up, exposing your skin that was indeed covered in goosebumps. Before you could say anything, Anakin gently untangled your hands from his hair, taking them in his metal hand. Still looking at you with that worried expression on his face, he started rubbing circles into your skin with his flesh hand.

You didn’t have to be able to read people’s emotions like he could to know that he was blaming himself for your shivering.

„Well, not everyone of us can be Anakin Skywalker, superhuman who’s able to face the freezing night-air with nothing more than his sleep pants“, you tried to joke.

Anakin rolled his eyes at your words. „You’re so funny“, he deadpanned, before scooping you up in his arms. „Let’s get you back inside.“

You wound your arms around his neck, burying your face against his muscled chest and listening to his steady heartbeat against your ears as he carried you back inside. He gently laid you down on the bed and you quickly discarded your robe, before scooping into his already opened arms.

He drew you closer to him, until you we pressed up against each other and you could feel the strong muscles and hard planes of his chest against your back. His metal hand came to rest upon your stomach, whereas his flesh hand began to play with your hair.

You carefully shifted around in his embrace, until you were able to face him. You reached out one of your hands, smoothing over his brows that were still furrowed in concern and ran your fingers through his curls again. His eyelids fluttered closed, long lashes resting upon his cheeks, and you pressed a chaste kiss against his lips.

He looked so peaceful, almost as if nothing had ever worried him at all. You didn’t want to disturb him, but there were still some words that you needed to get off your chest.

„Ani?“, you said tentatively.

„Mhm?“, he murmured, eyes still closed, his metal hand drawing lazy circles across your hips.

„I just want to you know that I’m here - and that you can talk to me. I know - I know that it’s hard for you to open up and to allow yourself to be vulnerable, but you’re not going to solve anything by shutting me out“, you said.

„I know“, he said quietly, opening his eyes. „It’s just - I don’t want you to worry about me. Or about the nightmares - „

„Anakin“, you interrupted him gently, „I love you. And I want to worry about you. But not because you’re shutting me out again, trying to deal with your problems by swallowing them up inside. You know that you can tell me anything.“

„But - the nightmares - „

„I can handle it“, you said. „I can handle it“, you repeated, but the worry still wouldn’t leave his eyes. „We can handle them together. I promise. Just please don’t go shutting me out again.“

„You’re right. I’m sorry“, he said, sighing. „It’s just - the thought of losing you worries me so much, I can’t stand it. I’ve hardly been able to think about anything else these last few days.“

„I know“, you said, leaning forward to kiss him again. „I know. But, Anakin - nothing’s going to happen.“

„I went let anything happen to you“, he reiterated his earlier promise.

You nodded. „ I know.“

„And - I won’t shut you out again. I promise“, he added, and you could hear that he was still struggling with these words.

„Well, I sure hope so“, you replied, smiling.

„And - I’m sorry for being so difficult sometimes“, Anakin said, eyes downcast.

„Yeah, well, we all have our flaws“, you couldn’t help but grin. Anakin’s eyes shot up to your face again and he rolled his eyes, though you could see the smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

„Oh, shut up“, he threw your earlier words back at you, before capturing your lips in another kiss.

#Anakin Skywalker #anakin needs a hug #anakin x y/n #anakin skywalker imagine #anakin skywalker x you #anakin skywalker x re #anakin skywalker has issues #angst and fluff #angst and fluff and smut #anakin skywalker smut #anakin skywalker fluff #writing #my writing #may the force be with you #maythefloorbewithyouanakin

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xiaosenthusiast · 2 years

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08. kind of makes this trip suck

before you could all start walking into the carnival hu tao spoke up.

“so how are we doing this?”

“what do you mean?”

“i mean how are we getting into groups?”

“oh.”

you hadn’t really thought about it, but you could see who wanted to be partners with who. lumine was looking at a certain someone, he was looking back. xiao was also looking at lumine but she was looking at one of his friends. albedo.

“albedo do you wanna be partners?”

“sure.”

the first group was formed, lumine and albedo.

after lumine paired up with albedo, xiao had a disappointed look on his face. you got closer to him and you felt his hair tickle your face.

“hey, don’t be so disappointed. i mean…we can be partners?”

he turned to you and his face became even more disappointed. but he agreed.

“okay then that leaves me and kazuha..why’d i get him?”

she grumbled before walking into the carnival. lumine smiled at albedo and they held hands while walking into the carnival.

xiao, being annoyed, grabbed your hand and followed closely behind them. “what ride first?”

while xiao listened closely into their conversation, you just stared at your hand intertwined with his. you felt your heart beat quicken and felt your face become hot.

soon enough he was pulling you along with him, right. we’re following lumine and albedo.

‘yn snap out of it! you’re only holding hands!’

although you were trying to focus on lumine and albedo, you couldn’t stop staring at xiao.

he just looked so…pretty.

the first ride was bumper cars so you got in a car with xiao and he immediately aimed for lumine and albedo.

to be honest you were getting kind of annoyed with how persistent he was.

i know he has a crush on lumine but can’t he at least acknowledge me? i’m still his friend.

when we got on the ferris wheel, you saw hu tao talking to the ride operator…and giving him some extra money?!

you gave her a look and she just gave you a smug smile.

you weren’t at the top when the ride stopped but you were kind of at the top…do you get what i mean?

but anyways, turns out hu tao slipped him some cash so that you would all have the best fireworks seats.

you were amazed by the fireworks, they were so pretty!

you turned to xiao but all he seemed focused on was lumine and albedo, who were in the cart in front of us.

you sighed and grabbed his chin, making him face you.

“yn?! what are yo-“

“xiao. i get it. you like lumi, but you can take a break from stalking her every once in a while yknow?”

“oh please, i don’t-“

“xiao, you’ve been focused on them this whole evening. it kind of makes this trip suck.”

he looked at you with wide eyes and let out a sigh. he gave lumi and albedo one more glance before fully facing you.

“i’m sorry..i didn’t realize that you were trying to have fun..i was just so focused on them i forgot why you came in the first place.”

“it’s okay..just make sure you have some fun too. you don’t have to watch over them 24/7 haha.”

you gave him a soft smile and turned your attention to the fireworks again.

after the ferris wheel you got on more rides with xiao and he seemed to be enjoying himself more. although you guys weren’t holding hands anymore, you were happy he finally had fun instead of stalking lumine.

at the end of the trip, you realized you still had to drive xiao home.

what a pain in the ass

extra !

“soo…lumine likes albedo huh?”

“yeah…sorry i didn’t tell you..”

it was quiet for a while until he started playing txt.

“are you gonna move on? or are you gonna ‘fight for her love’ haha”

“don’t worry i’ll move on w u bby gorl”

he bit his lip and made that stupid face

“wha- hey! don’t joke around with me!”

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

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a/n -ˋˏ✄┈┈ i love adding clichés theyre sm fun to write

taglist ! @mikctp @fvrose @kayleigh-reuthlr @xxgenderenvyxx @ferumie @sxiaoul @whats-humanity-lol @skatercashew @kuni-kuzushii @plinkuro

if ur blog is in bold that means i can’t tag u due to ur privacy settings ! if u change ur username lmk !!

#angst #genshin x you #genshin xiao #adeptus xiao #genshin x reader #modern au #xiao x reader #xiao x you #highschool au #xiao angst #genshin smau #genshin impact xiao #alatus #social media au #xiao smau #until i found you — series

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ikemengoessbrrrrr · 4 months

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Finally I post this let's just say part 2 from high school au from @squaric-acid and like always don't forget to tag @catsafarithewriter

Yea takes so long because it's been a while since I write anything and I'm not really a pro writer

BTW ENJOY!

|| There's a Ghost at School

“What do you mean, it was real?"

"Please, believe me!"

Haru and Hiromi were on their way to the cafeteria. This was supposed to be a normal school day and an ordinary journey for lunch, but Hiromi kept retelling the same story that had been rumored lately among students in their school. Of course, Haru was one of the people who didn’t believe the rumor—a ghost wandering in the school library? It was as ridiculous as it sounded.

"Geez, stop being too realistic and think about it for a second! The library ghost, that’s classic!" Hiromi said.

"You mean cliché?" Haru replied with a smile. Before Hiromi could add more, they both arrived in the cafeteria. Getting their lunch and sitting at one of the tables, they began to eat peacefully. Haru couldn’t help but listen to the murmurs of people around them, unsurprisingly about the ghost in the library. Some said they saw it in the corner, while others claimed to have made eye contact with it. Haru rolled her eyes, internally scolding herself for having been slightly interested in the rumor.

"Come on, Haru, do you really believe ghosts are real?" Haru whispered to herself.

"Well, I think it is real," said a voice behind her. She immediately swiveled her head and turned around to look up at the dark-haired man.

"Oh, Toto, it’s you!" Haru exclaimed.

Toto giggled and invited himself to sit at their table beside Haru. "I guess you both girls are also interested in this ghost situation," he added.

Haru shrugged, "Hiromi does," the person in question waved and grinned, then she leaned forward.

"You said you believe in ghosts, so you think it’s real?" Hiromi asked enthusiastically.

Toto hummed, "I’m not sure, I never checked it myself. But Baron said he accidentally captured the ghost with his camera."

It made both girls stand up.

"Really?!"

Hiromi got more excited, "So, you mean Baron saw the ghost!"

Haru herself, hating to start getting interested, but if this involves Baron, there’s something really going on, right?

"Is he sure about it?" Haru asked.

Toto shrugged, also standing up himself, "Why don’t you ask him?" His eyes then scanned around and stopped when he found something he looked for.

"As much as I’d like to accompany you girls, I need to stop a cow from emptying the entire cafeteria." He waved and began to walk away, "Hey, fatso! I asked you to get my lunch, not for you to have double!"

Haru and Hiromi waved back, now alone again. Hiromi gazed at Haru, grinning. Haru rolled her eyes tiredly but smiled nonetheless.

"Alright, let’s check on Baron and see what he got." She didn’t want to admit feeling excited about seeing Baron again; it had been a while. They were in different classes, so Haru rarely met him, which made her sad, but she kept it to herself.

"Besides, it’s just a simple crush anyway."

Both girls arrived in front of the photography club. Haru glanced at Hiromi who just shrugged, she sighed and knocked on the door. The door sliding revealed a man head taller than them both, with tawny hair and green eyes looking at them. The gentle gaze can make Haru melt, she tried to snap out of it.

Haru was too focused on not making a fool of herself, and didn’t notice Baron keeps staring at her until Hiromi cleared her throat to get their attention. Baron smiled at them both and finally started the conversation, “So, may I ask what brings the ladies here?”

Before Haru could reply, Hiromi beat her to it as she asked Baron, “Toto said, you captured a ghost in the library.”

“Accidentally.” Haru added.

Baron hummed in acknowledgement, “Toto isn’t wrong about that, however I myself am not sure about the authenticity of the photo I took.” Baron stepped back into the room, inviting the girls to come in, “Let’s talk about it over a cup of tea.”

As they settled in, Haru looked around the interior of the photography club, like the name, it was full of photographs, but at the same time the feel is not really your usual photography club. Haru remembered what Muta said about the club just to cover for Baron’s other hobby - a refuge to people who like to help. Haru smiled thinking about it, knowing how sweet Baron was for wanting to help others. Still, wondering why he didn’t join the students council instead. But then again, Baron did say he didn’t like how the student council worked in their school.

Baron placed cups of tea in front of them, which Haru and Hiromi gratefully accepted and sipped the content.

“I assume you also want to see the picture?” Baron asked as he sipped his own tea.

They both nodded and leaned to picture Baron put on the table. Haru’s eyes widened, Toto wasn't wrong, Baron indeed captured something unusual. In the picture it’s like a normal library but in the left corner there's a blurry white image. They couldn’t make out what the image is if that’s just a person, a thing, or really a ghost.

Hiromi grinning, “See! A ghost!” She pointed it and grinned at Haru, who rolled her eyes in exasperation.

“Yes Hiromi, a ghost.”

Baron chuckled, “It seems like there was an unusual individual in that picture. I can't say I'm entirely sure if that's really the ghost people have been talking about”

“Didn't you see something when you took this picture?” Haru asked.

“Regretfully, I was too stunned to immediately check after I took it. When I registered myself, the thing wasn't there anymore.”

“Ohh… freaky.” Hiromi chimed in.

There’s something that also Haru wondered about, “Why did you take a picture in the library?”

Baron coughed a bit, “Well, someone asked me to take the picture for reference.”

“It’s prohibited.”

“I know.”

“...”

Baron shrugged, and Haru sighed as she smiled, while Hiromi giggled.

“Anyway, Baron, do you get any more pictures?”

“No, that’s the only picture I have with the ‘ghost’ in it.”

Haru stared at the picture again,examining the details for anything unusual beyond the blurred white shadow.

“Want to investigate it?” She announced suddenly. Hiromi lit up,”Heck yeah! Let’s go!”

Baron once again stared at Haru, his gaze filled with pride and the same warm wonder, causing Haru yet again blushing at his gaze.

Baron tore away his gaze, stood up. “I think Haru has a good idea. Why don’t we check it out?”

And then off they go.

“You know, I started to regret my own suggestion.”

Haru didn’t know what to expect when decided to spy in the library for the ghost. Probably waiting indeed happened but she didn’t think they would need to wait behind books in the bookshelf.

“Why don’t we sit down like normal people?” Haru asked.

Baron, who was skimming a book, replied, “For your information, normal people also read while standing.”

Haru rolled her eyes, “Yeah, but they don’t stare at one spot among the books.”

“Shush guys! You both can scare the ghost!” Hiromi lifted her face from the upside-down book she held.

“Isn’t it the other way around?” Baron asked.

“You scared of ghosts?” Haru raised one of her eyebrows amusingly.

“Never sure, but as far as I know, no, I’m not scared.”

Hiromi looked over the spot they had been spying on, “Man, why hasn’t the ghost shown up yet?”

Haru sighed, leaning on the bookshelf, “I guess it indeed scared of us.”

“Damn it Baron you ruined it!” Hiromi added, with Haru giggling at the accusation.

“Excuse me?”

“Your face probably make it shy.”

Baron smirked, playing along, “Oh my, I must face the corner then.”

They all laughed together.

Haru take deep breath, “Nah Baron you’re fine it just-”

“What are you guys doing here?”

A voice interrupted her voice, making all of them screaming in surprise.

Their heads all snapped back to see the origin of the sound. Immediately sighed in relief when they found out it wasn’t a ghost. In front of them stood a young man with grey-blue hair and heterochromia eyes, looking at them confused.

“Wow, you guys look like you've seen a ghost.”

Haru sighed, “If only that had happened, but thank God it’s only you behind us, Lune.”

Hiromi giggled, “It would be worse if the ghost were behind us because it was mad at us from spying on it.”

“A real ghost?” Lune echoed.

“You probably know the rumor flying around the school,” Baron stated.

Lune thought for a while and hummed, “Ah, yeah, it has been around nowadays, a hot topic, especially one of the reasons for people reaching out to the student council.”

“They reached out to you because of a ghost?” Haru asked.

“They reached out to us for many things, but you can say that.” Lune smirked.

Somehow Baron felt Lune knew something, being curious himself, he started to ask, “Do you may have known about the ghost situation?”

Lune glanced at Baron, his subtle grin did not go unnoticed by others, “Oh yeah, the ghost hm, honestly Baron, I never thought you are the type of person who believes in ghosts.”

“He did capture it.” Hiromi pointed out.

“Oh really?”

Haru pointed at Baron, he shrugged and Haru showed Lune the picture. Lune stared at the picture he retrieved on his hand. The same library with blurred shadow.

“Fascinating.”

The others looked at each other and back at him. “You know something?”

Lune yet again grinning, “I guess you guys will find out.” With that he waved before leaving the trio once again.

“Well, what should we do now? Continue waiting?” Haru asked after the silence.

Like answering her question, the bell rang, signaling for the next class.

“Welp, that's our cue.” Hiromi said.

Baron nodded, “I think our investigation will halt for now.”

After the next class Haru walked in the hallways carrying a stack of papers to the teachers’ office. As her steps echoed through the hallways, Haru noticed a shadow on the corner. Curious, she followed it, her eyes widened seeing that shadow moved into the library. Haru gulped, she cautiously stepped in and looked around. The school day is almost over so the room is empty.

Setting the papers down on the table, she tiptoed further into the library and jumped slightly at a noise catching her ear. Turning toward the corner, she spotted the shadow and swiftly, she came out from the corner only to be met with a pair of shock blue eyes.

“Aaah!”

“Kyaa!”

Both screamed, Haru backing away while the other almost fell from the chair. After momentary chaos, now finally had calmed down. Haru sighed, she glanced at the person in front of her who was busy picking themself from the floor.

“Yuki?!” Haru’s eyes widened.

Yuki jumped but then she smiled. “Hi Haru.”

“Yuki, why are you here at this hour?”

Yuki smiled sheepishly, “I'm always here at this hour?”

“Why?”

“The library is quiet at this hour so I take my chance to read many books before going home.”

Haru nodded, and asked again, “Do usually someone find you?”

“I always run and hide,”Yuki admitted, “I;m still afraid to interact with people I don't know.”

Haru understood, Yuki was always a shy student, yet she is also the most pretty, diligent, and kind person Haru knew. Then suddenly, some details surfaced and clicked in her brain.

“You said you're always here at this hour?”

“Yes?”

Haru pondered for a moment, putting her hand on her chin, then she grinned, “I think I’ve just resolved a rumor.”

“Yuki is the ghost?!”

Hiromi, Toto, and Muta said in unison.

“Hmm… that surprisingly makes sense.” added Baron.

Yuki apologized to all of them for causing chaos, Lune just laughing, it turned out he already knew Yuki is the ‘ghost’. Yuki herself was unaware about the rumor, as she never believed them.

“And you didn't even announce it to fix the situation?” Haru folded her arms. Lune just grinned, “Sorry, I wanted to protect Yuki’s privacy, and seeing rumors like this make our school more lively, am I right?”

Muta rolled his eyes, “You mean unnecessary drama.”

Haru sighed and smiled at everyone, “Welp, I guess this investigation is a success!”

Lune nodded and glanced slightly at Yuki, casting a sweet smile on her, pink colored Yuki’s cheeks she also smiled back. Lune was about to leave to finish some jobs but he stopped.

“Oh yeah, Baron, meet me at the student council room.”

Baron raised an eyebrow. Lune glanced and smirked, “You broke school rules about not to take photos in the library. I suppose you're aware of that?”

Hearing that Baron stiffened and awkwardly looking away. Oh yeah, Haru also just remembered that, she felt guilty for dragging him for that photo. Lune waited, gesturing for Baron to follow. Baron sighed and followed the student council president.

Haru planned apologize to him later.

#phew now I will post the rest of the secret santa with peace #huehue #I'm bad at this ngl #tcr secret santa 2023 #the cat returns #tcr fic #tcr

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gay-dorito-dust · 2 years

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Could you do an eddie x ftm!reader where eddie comforts the reader after he's had a really bad day because people keep bullying him and giving him dysmorphia

A/n: I’m gonna be sappy for a bit but I’m truly honoured you guys are trusting me and requesting me to write these kinds of fanfictions and at least give someone the pick me up they need. I try my best.

“I fucking hate this goddamn town!” You slammed the door to the trailer shut, tossing aside your jacket as you situated yourself on the couch; where your hands proceeded to then pull against the fabric of Eddie’s shirt you borrowed awhile back in attempts of stretching the seams so unfavourable parts of yourself wouldn’t be as visible to the human eye. It felt as though the shirt itself was shrinking and in the process was becoming a sort of second skin on top of your own skin, leaving you with an exposed feeling within your chest as thousands of imaginary rose lenses tinted eyes saw you the way they expected to perceive you as per the rules of a corrupt society.

It was moments like these where you just wished that you could stretch and mould your skin into your preferred form and stay that way but unfortunately skin doesn’t work like that exactly. The only way to shape and mould it they way you’ve always desired was through surgery procedures and they cost an insane amount of money, money of which you didn’t have; your job didn’t pay you that handsomely. It hurt. It hurt to know that you’d never be accepted for who you truly were by the very people who’ve only ever perceived you the way they raised you as and refused to change their viewpoint -adamant even- that in the process they disregarded your request of the bare minimum by crushing it under their shoes like gum.

It hurt so fucking much. You didn’t wish to continue fighting with yourself over a particular part of your being after some passing comments made by narrow minded dickheads who thought point out the insecurities of others would immediately make them better by comparison when in actuality it just made them look like a bigger dick. As much as you wanted to act like their words didn’t mean shit when in reality you would spend the remainder of the day sat in front of the mirror, mentally tearing yourself down over the very features that were just the catalyst of your issues concerning your image; visible or not you found yourself hating your body even more then ever as you would start hiding those parts beneath clothing as if that would solve the problem. Life wouldn’t allow you a peaceful existence, life wanted to see you suffer and crumple beneath the weight and pathetically give up.

“I just wish everyone would go away, keep their fucking comments to themselves and let me live within my delusion but I guess I’m not even aloud that luxury huh?” You cried, scratching your skin as if with the intention with ripping of off in hopes that new and improved skin would appear beneath, skin that wouldn’t cage you in a body you’d despise to the point of frustrated tears. Uncaring of the damage you’d cause in the process for you were too numb in your self-hatred to even acknowledge the action in favour of savouring the words thrown at you earlier today and channeling it into a method of self-deprivation. “Does that include me then?” You looked up in time to see Eddie standing in the doorway, having overheard every word that left your mouth from his room. His brown eyes conveyed his sadness for you but also his concern as they flicker to the hand scratching at your forearm with a flash of pain cutting across them. “What?” “When you said that you wished everyone would essentially fuck off, does that include me?” Eddie asked softly, not wanting to push you over the edge you were already dangerously dangling over.

“No Eddie, never you because right now I need you to hold me together before I fall apart.” You whimpered, tears blurring your vision of your boyfriend as your arms were outstretched towards him in a desperate need of comfort that could only be achieved within his arms. Eddie wasted no time in bringing you into his arms, pressing you tightly against his chest, offering you the golden opportunity to rest your head against the crook of his neck and inhaling his scent of mint, weed and Cedar wood. Your hands clasped at the back of his leather jacket as tightly as they could as to keep Eddie where you needed him that you swore you held the power to rip it to shreds at any given moment for being a hindrance in having him so much closer to you. “Eddie I-Eddie I’m tired of hating who I see in the mirror after someone makes a snide comment. I hate being so fucking susceptible in hating myself and every little part of my body because it doesn’t fit the ideal body type I’ve had in mind! I don’t want to wake up to a reality where you see the imperfections of my body and start thinking of me negatively like everyone else in this fucked up town. I don’t think I could bear loosing you to them.” You sniffled, burying your head further into his neck as his grip on you tightened, “I just wanted to be worth being seen by your side without having my dysmorphia reopened.” Eddie truly didn’t know how to respond to that but decided that the longer he took in thinking the more you’d think that he no longer wanted you, which was utter bullshit to Eddie because how could he not want you. He’s had his eye on you for as long as he could remember and to finally have you felt like a blessing to him because to Eddie you were borderline perfect; no amount of imperfections of your body would ever change that because Eddie would gladly spend the rest of his life praising you and your body like the god you were.

So instead he chose to speak from the heart. “If you are tired then rest your weary head against my neck as you are right now,” Eddie paused to reach for your hand behind his back, grasping it strongly in his own as he pressed a kiss against it, “rest your aching hands in mine and if you heart is hurting then lay it upon mine so I can soothe it back to health with sweet nothings and an abundance of affection.” He concludes his sentences by pressing a plethora of kisses against your head, neck and shoulders chasing you to let loose some giggles that never failed to make him melt. “I sometimes wish you could see yourself the way I see you y/n because to me when I look upon you all I see is the man I’m lucky enough to call my boyfriend! I mean do you know how hard it was for me to muster up the courage to ask the most handsomest, the most charming, the most sexiest man in all of Hawkins?! I was damn near pissing myself because I didn’t think someone as jaw dropping as you would ever go for a loser like me.” You drew away from Eddie to look him in the eyes as you used your free hand to touch the side of his neck, bringing his forehead to yours as your eyes remained on him, “really?” You whispered as though you were sharing secrets.

“Oh totally, you’ve made this man’s fantasies come true y/n and I could never thank you enough for giving us a shot especially after the sharpie incident with Dustin.” You remembered the sharpie incident very well much to Eddie’s dismay whenever you brought it up. One day you, Dustin, Eddie, Max, Lucas, Steve, Nancy and Robin were having a movie night over at Eddie’s trailer and sometime after Eddie fell asleep Steve though it a genius plan to dare Dustin to draw a sharpie moustache on Eddie before he woke up. Why? You didn’t know but you did try to reason with the boy but Steve had one hell of an influence on him as Dustin did just that. Once Eddie awoke to see what had been done, he chased Steve and Dustin out of the trailer and into the woods where they play fought for a little while before becoming back with leaves stuck to their hair, dirt clung to their skin and massive grins on their faces. They truly acted like brothers and it warmed your heart to see Eddie so happy that after playfully shoving Dustin inside the trailer after ruffling his hair free of leaves, high on his adrenaline rush, he stole a kiss from your lips that night. You weren’t even dating at the time but it was obvious to your friends that something was going on seeing as neither of you were good at hiding your feelings as well as you thought.

“You looked quite dapper with a sharpie moustache if I do say so myself.” You teased, running a finger across his upper lip, narrowly avoiding his teeth as he tried to playfully bite you. “I could grow one out for you if you’d like.” Eddie replied but you laughed, “with the rate that your facial hair is growing? Yeah that’ll take quite a while.” Eddie pulled back from you with a look of offence as he placed a hand over his chest. “How could you say that to me after all the sweet things I had to say about you? I am hurt, you have wounded me, how can I go on knowing this betrayal is the thing that ended me.” You laughed loudly at his theatrics and decided to play along because it was a favourite of yours to play into his theatrics as a way of expressing your love for him. “Well I guess I’ll have to withhold giving you all my healing kisses if that’s how your going to act.” Eddie peaked at you with wide puppy dog eyes as he quickly grasped you by the arms,“healing kisses you say? Well why don’t we test that theory in the privacy of my room?” He winked as he rushed you into his room and shutting the door behind him with his foot as the only thing that could be heard was muffled laughter from the pair of you.

#eddie munson x male reader #eddie munson imagines #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson fic #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x reader

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skykashi · 2 years

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regarding obikaka, i too find the ship so off putting because it's mostly for obito fans who don't even like kakashi but use him to make obito look superior by making kakshi weak or by having Kakashi constantly be sorry to Obito (for what exactly?). and I think canon itself lay the groundwork for that because obito is such a weak character with such weak motivations that kishi himself used kakashi to validate obito's non existent pain and motivations. It was insane seeing that whole flashback sequence of obito's childhood where his big under dog story is being in a one sided competition with a Kakashi and feeling inferior to Kakashi in his training and his crush on Rin meanwhile in the background Kakashi is shutting down after having to witness his father driven to suicide at age 6 by the village he has to continue to live in. Even Rin's death, on which obito's entire villain origin story hinges, is far more traumatic an experience for Kakashi than it can be for obito. And yet kishi writes adult Kakashi and obito with Kakashi completely racked with guilt and obito and everyone else, including Edo tensei Minato acting like that guilt or obito's weird self righteousness over kakashi's guilt is justified. Because obito's pain and villain origin story completely falls apart unless you have Kakashi specifically, who has objectively suffered far more without turning into a mass murder of innocent people, validate that pain and villain origin story. So obito fans are basically taking their cues from kishi when they continue to write exactly that in their fics and hcs and only use Kakashi as a means to validate obito and nothing else

Hi, sorry it took me awhile to answer this but there's a lot to unfold here so I needed a clear mind to answer it properly... Anyway,

No one in canon blamed Kakashi for what happened except Kakashi himself, everyone else including Obito, didn't think any of it was Kakashi's fault, yeah at first Obito was pretending that he blames Kakashi because he wanted Kakashi by his side when he achieves his goal, he was taking advantage of Kakashi's guilt to convert him exactly like Madara did to Obito using his pain to make him see how corrupted the world is and that there's no other way except Infinite Tsukuyomi but later he admitted that he never blamed Kakashi and that he knows the truth about Rin's death and that he even doesn't want Kakashi to suffer or keep feeling guilty, he just wants Kakashi to be happy too

Having said that, the way the toxic part of the Obikaka shippers and some of Obito fans are acting is not only making Kakashi way out of character, it's doing the same to Obito too, they aren't just ruining Kakashi's image, they are ruining Obito's too because like you, so many people ends up getting the wrong picture about Obito, and ends up hating him because of the way they are portraying him

Not only that canon Obito didn't blame Kakashi, canon Obito never looked down on Kakashi either, at first he was just pretending because he believed that it's the only way to make Kakashi see that his plan is the only way but he acknowledged the fact that Kakashi had the power and the means to kill him several times but he chose not to

In Obito's perfect dream world he didn't just want Kakashi by his side, he also acknowledged the fact that Kakashi is just as good and qualified as him and that he can easily be the Hokage too if he wants

So like I said, those types of toxic fans aren't only being unfair to Kakashi, they are being unfair to Obito too and are putting people off from the entire ship and from Obito too, they are forcing so many people to hate their favorite character and misunderstand him.

You know, this might sound a bit silly but I noticed that this type of shippers never tag things as Kakaobi, it's always Obikaka to them because they just can't stand the thought of Kakashi being on top lol, I always look at the tags of the Kakashi and Obito posts first, if I see the Kakaobi tag there, I immediately know that this person isn't part of the toxic fandom and by that I don't mean that everyone who tags posts as Obikaka is part of the toxic part of the fandom, no... I mean that the toxic part of the fandom hates the Kakaobi tag.

@loadbearinonion explained perfectly the mindset of this type of shippers, not just in the Obikaka fandom, in a lot of Kakashi ships when they make Kakashi a lot smaller and weaker than he actually is while making the other character so big and strong and perfect even tho in canon both of them are equal in size and strength and everything

This is not just sad, it's homophobic and disgusting.

#my asks #sky answers #fandom bs

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whenthechickencry · 2 months

Text

Umineko EP7. Replay Part 2

Everyone Sayo started being a servant with left at the same time, leaving Sayo with mixed feelings of disappointment and relief, but still pretty hopeful at what the future will bring... This is the first time someone other than Sayo acknowledges Shannon as a person, so I think this is around when she started messing with other identities? Makes sense that when all the servants left she could start trying to be someone other than "Yasu", who she hated.

Sayo's pranks are really mean if you think about it, and some servants are clearly very unsettled by them. Obviously, though, this is Sayo's way of getting back at people that torment her. A bit of a power trip for someone who has very limited control on their life otherwise. The effort Sayo had put into bettering herself when a new group of people came went to waste because the rumors started by people not even there anymore still persisted....

This scene marks the change from Beatrice, Gaap, Shannon as vague concepts she had in her head into actual characters with laid-out backstories. Including some hasty rewrites lol sorry Gaap you are nameless now.

....

Shannon's role changes here as well - she used to be Sayo's imaginary friend, the perfect example of a servant who everyone liked. But with Shannon becoming a physical person and not just an ideal Sayo strives to be she is now someone who "messes up from time to time, .... but I want to become a kind servant whom everyone loves", also goes to school despite the Shannon character being an older servant. Mixing up elements from Shannon the character and Sayo the actor of Shannon. As pleasant as writing and escapism and imaginary friends can be, Sayo still wants to have actual, human relationships.

It's played up as Shannon is a pervert haha and yes I am sure she was also starting to develop sexual thoughts but also I wonder how much of it was curiosity about how bodies were supposed to be growing when her body wasn't growing like it was "supposed" to....

It's really not hard what caused Sayo to fixate on this concept and Battler.... someone who feels such general unease about their identity, about their life, etc. When someone comes at you talking about how you can't neglect people's inner worlds and they like looking into that....

These words are so senseless, and I am not like, dunking on Battler he was a child as well, but saying to a person who is hurting that you are going to save them any time when you actually can't do that... Giving a person who feels trapped in a shitty life hope that you will save them when you have no means or intention to is extremely cruel regardless of intention.

We go back to Will-Lion commentary and Lion is freaking out more and saying they can't understand, and Will tells Lion they are the man character of this play and that Clair herself thinks she is impossible to understand by now... so they should shut up, keep listening and understanding. Sayo doesn't have kind words for Battler right now, hahah.

Shannon finds out about Battler leaving the family and we get more details about this... it's not really a surprise that Battler does not like the fact his mom died, a random woman is immediately joining their 'family', and it's obvious he was cheating on Asumu while she was alive. Natsuhi is giving Rudolf shit since she hates infidelity ofc. Just saying that I am not really surprised Natsuhi seems to suspect Krauss of cheating, I don't think anyone would like to be told by their partner that they get TOO angry about cheating and to be less mean to cheaters.

I don't think anyone can really give Battler shit for this specific decision he made. I think he was well within his rights to grieve his mother like this. I think the part you CAN give him shit is not trying to keep contact with Shannon in any way and robbing her both of her best friend, crush and hope for the future without so much as saying "I know, I'm sorry". "...In the worst case, I might have to wait until the next family conference."

Sayo's conception of "A life with Battler" is surprisingly grounded. Go back to the orphanage, use your work money to be able to see him occasionally, finish school, and move to an area nearby. WAY more of a real plan than Battler just saying "Come live with me lol". She's putting so much thought unto something that was definitely said with no thoughts behind it. George is like HE'S NEVER COMING BACK PAY ATTENTION TO MEEEE

Sayo is disappointed about Battler not coming so she starts trying to control the situation by blaming herself... it was her fault for not being resolved. Her fault for not being ready yet. As soon as she's ready he's gonna come.

Battler's way of treating women is compared to Rudolf yet again. It's obvious his disregard for women's feelings comes from him, and him finally apologizing to Beatrice and seeing the truth is him doing something Rudolf never learned to fix on himself.

Sayo agonizes some more about how this is a trial, she will persevere, knowing deep inside that it's less and less likely. It is so much crueler to leave her hanging than to say anything to confirm or deny his memories... being stuck means that every time you see the obvious truth it feels like she's betraying Battler because there's no actual proof of anything, just her changing perception of him.... As soon as she gets some resolve that Battler's gone... there's confirmation that things are claiming down between Battler and Rudolf, a new cruel hope. And that hope is immediately replaced with cruel reality, man, he even wrote to Maria and he can't even bother to remember the person he exchanged stories and books and promises with constantly....

It's extremely hurtful to your soul to feel like this.... when you know how someone deeply hurt you and you want any sort of closure but.... that person didn't even consider hurting you anything special on their life so to them it's like asking them what they ate for breakfast a year ago.

The voice acting here fuck......

Sayo eventually creates Kanon to cope with her crippling loneliness and disappointment and realizing that Battler didn't really gaf and hid her love for Battler inside 'Beatrice'. Also, Sayo got prettyyyy lucky that Battler's ideal woman is already vaguely like Beatrice anyways.

Kiznzo and Genji hang the epitaph, Kumasawa and Genji start goading Sayo into solving it....

If you think about it, just the fact that you physically have to go to the island to test your solution immediately slants the answer to certain people. Sayo can make a wrong guess and check more or less every day, but if anyone else makes a wrong guess they can check like... thrice a year?

"If I hand you Beatrice, will you violate her again" asks Genji, who will then hand him Beatrice again because he cried enough about it, I guess.

Anyways I am crying again god I hate you Kinzo I hate you Genji let this poor girl live her own fucking life. It's kind of interesting Sayo doesn't seem to name her creations.... Beatrice, Shannon, Kanon had names due to circumstance but Ronove, Virgilia and Gaap weren't named until Maria gave them names. Guess that's her weakness as a writer!

Sayo and Maria treasure their time with each other of course, they have a lot of fun together but.... Maria can't really fulfill all of Sayo's emotional needs, nor vice versa.

Genji starts by dropping the hint about Taiwan, we get a step-by-step breakdown of how to solve the riddle.... you can tell it was a tremendous amount of effort even with the hints. Must have made the fact it was a pre-ordained fate to please the person that ruined your life hurt that much more.... Weird, creepy, and erasing of Sayo's own personhood to ask this of her.... You changed her name, you changed her family, you changed her age, and now you are having her swap into someone else for the eyes of Kinzo....

The coronation scene is very unsettling... the focus is entirely on Kinzo "earning" forgiveness for someone who isn't even clear on what he did.... Sayo realizes everyone around her has been lying to her about her identity her entire life. They start calling her Lion which is ANOTHER name she has no connection to that was forced on her, and Kinzo forces her to call her father and she feels clearly unsettled by this. What right do you have to determine that, Genji? He admitted none of his sins and merely asked for forgiveness to someone without even telling them what he did.

Sayo doesn't really want to be the head or ruin Krauss etc's life.... and her life starts going on a downward spiral as she starts realizing the truth of her heritage, her body, her relations to her lovers, and everything in a moment she was already vulnerable.

No one wants to be a witch.... living in the edges of reality to cope with how harsh reality is.

George stepping out would have broken the game.... Jessica checking on Kanon would have broken the game as well. The choice of people who can break the game is interesting.... seems like she was in a way testing them.

Thinking of that locked room just makes me sad....

The obvious culprit - so that was definitely Eva.... I guess Sayo only did the first four and Nanjo.

....

Lion haha.... Sayo would be so happy to hear that.

This whole ending ceremony feels very.... disconcerting once you know what's about to happen. But Sayo is not nearly or uniquely the only problem of the Ushiromiya family... understanding just her won't lead you to understand all of 1986.

#umineko #umiepisode7

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