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awearywritersworld · 10 months

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the three times gojo thinks he might be in love and the time he knows for sure

gojo satoru x reader summary: title says it all w/c: 1k tags/warnings: ft baby megumi. fluff, then some more fluff. gumi refers to reader as mom. one curse word. brief reference to canon typical violence. a/n: i am ridiculously soft for this man. he needs a hug masterlist check out my latest work for gojo here

the first time it happens, it's the dead of winter and you're both still teenagers. it's the year before the star plasma vessel mission, when everything in gojo's life feels like it's falling into place. he has friends, real friends, for the first time in his life.

you drag him, kicking and screaming (it's all for show, he'd go anywhere with you), out to a snow covered field. you innocently beg him to turn off limitless, and of course he acquiesces, only to be pelted in the face with a snowball.

he throws himself into the snow upon impact, arms flailing dramatically. "i'm dead! you've killed me!"

you join him on the ground, arms out stretched and nudging the fabric of his coat. "hm, then i guess i'll have to drink all the hot chocolate by myself-"

"i have returned to the living realm!!" he shouts, shooting up into a sitting position. "had to fight god for it, told 'im i couldn't bear to leave my (y/n)-chan!"

"oh, you are so full of shit," you accuse with an amused smile.

you gaze at one another as the snow falls around you silently, both somehow feeling warm despite the frigidness of the air. his glasses have slipped down his nose, giving you a glimpse at his eyes. you're thinking about how the flakes blend in with his lashes before melting away entirely. he's thinking that he might be in love with you.

~~~

some time passes before the second instance, which takes place in the spring. gojo makes his way around campus, looking for wherever you and megumi ran off to. the small boy has been attached to your hip ever since gojo brought him home two years ago.

when he finds you, you're both splayed out in the grass and pointing up at the clouds.

"that one looks like a dog!" megumi exclaims excitedly.

"and that one looks like it might be his ball, don't you think?" you question. he agrees wholeheartedly with an enthusiastic nod.

after awhile, megumi sits up, rubbing at his eyes. "can we go inside now, mom?"

there's a split second he doesn't realize what he's said, but when it dawns on him, he looks down right scared. "'m sorry!"

your features soften and your heart soars before you're gathering him up in your arms.

"oh, my sweet boy," you coo.

rocking him back and forth, you hold him for a few passing moments. he hides his face in your chest, his hands gripping onto your shirt as if it's his life line.

you pull away just enough to see his face. you'd do anything to stop the tears swimming in his eyes, just like any mother would. "you can call me whatever you like 'gumi."

"p-promise?"

"yup!" you assure, bopping his nose with your pointer finger. it earns a small giggle.

gojo watches as you rise from the ground, megumi's head now resting on your shoulder and his arms around your neck. you're humming as you walk back toward the buildings.

gojo's legs are like lead and his heart feels as if it's shifted up into his throat. for the first time, he thinks about getting married, about having a family. your face is at the forefront of every image that forces itself into his mind.

~~~

the third time happens in the dead of night. megumi is asleep and the two of you decide to watch a movie, but you're yawning before he even presses play.

you sit so close to him that you can feel the warmth radiate from his body and although you fight to keep your eyes open, you can't help but be lulled to sleep.

he tenses for a moment when your head lands squarely on his shoulder. it seems as if you're both frozen, but then you let out a soft snore as your body shifts and your hand moves to his stomach. he finally relaxes.

your hair had fallen across your face and he pushes it back behind your ear so that he can see you. he tries to ignore the urge to brush his fingers across your cheekbone, or over your bottom lip. he fails.

gojo remains still for hours, and it feels strange to the usually hyperactive man, but he's terrified of disturbing you. terrified that you'll pull away from him and he'll never get to feel like this again.

he lets that stupid movie play through twice, but he spends most of the time stealing glances at you. he does eventually turn the tv off and the only sounds that remain are the trill of summer crickets outside his window and your soft, slow breaths.

he has no idea what time it is when he falls asleep, but when he finally does, he dreams about that day in the snow.

~~~

leaves fall at your feet as the two of you make your way down the sidewalk. every now and then, your fingers brush against his and it makes his heart skip a beat. he wonders (hopes?) if anyone has mistaken you for a couple.

you come across a familiar mansion, one that the two of you exorcised together as teenagers. it feels like a lifetime ago. you stop at the gate, a bronze glint on the ground catching your eye.

crouching down, you brush away shades of orange and red to reveal a memorial for all the people who had died on the once cursed property.

"for the lives that were taken here, and for the lost soul who took them... may they rest now in the afterlife."

gojo scrunches his nose, about to make some comment about how pitiful it was to commemorate a cursed spirit, but the words die in his throat when you look up at him with watery eyes.

"this is so beautiful," you remark, turning back to the engraved words.

he shoves his hands in his pockets, peering down to read over the words once more. maybe he'd missed something?

"this community was so fearful, remember? people lost friends and family here." he nods even though you aren't looking at him, watching how your fingertips move across the words as if you're considering them further. "the spirit scared them and it stole from them, but they still regard it with sympathy and kindness.. it takes strength to do that, you know?"

he feels his chest tighten as he registers your words. for a fleeting instance, he feels like an asshole for ever finding it pitiful, but that was the thing. you have such an easy way about you, a sort of gentleness he had yet to find in anyone else. the time he spends in your company seems like the only respite he ever gets from the horrors of the world.

he hasn't answered you yet, so you look back to him expectantly. "don't you think it's beautiful, 'toru?"

god, he could fall to his knees right then and there. he could roll over and die on the chilly concrete and he'd consider it a privilege to have died by your side.

i love you. i love you. i love you. those are the only three words his brain can muster.

"yeah," he finally chokes out. "it really is."

#m!writes #gojo satoru #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru imagines #gojo #gojo x reader #gojo imagines #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen imagines #jjk #jjk x reader #jjk imagines #gojo satoru fluff #gojo fluff #jujutsu kaisen fluff #jjk fluff

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sorrowsofsilence · 5 months

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Burning Out • Teaser

I was lost, but now I'm found Under the lights and in the sounds So let us sing and sing it loud That we're not perfect, but we're proud of who we are

Noah Sebastian is lost. His crime-filled lifestyle is anything but perfect; but everything changes once he meets you.

Noah Sebastian x Fem!Reader

General Warnings: explicit content, smut 18+, mentions of drugs, alcohol, murder, other forms of crime, violence.

Authors note: hiiii. This story was requested by an anon a while back and I have decided to try and give it a shot (Prompt given was: Noah and the boys have a tough life and steal to make it by, and live in a motel room together. Meets reader and ends up breaking into her house unknowing.) I hope this vibes with what you wanted! <3 I have no idea how many chapters this will be, im just kinda gonna go with the flow!

Here’s the beginning of the chapter, just to see if anyone’s interested :3

NOAH

The world was always in a state of grey, the life of the concrete jungle persistently sucking out the souls of its inhabitants with every passing second. Destruction. Crime. Greed. A shattering abyss of capitalism and corruption.

Yet, within this life time, I don’t think I was meant to be the good guy either.

Perhaps there was a chance for me, someday or somehow within another universe.

For now, the only thing I could think about was how my heart pounded as the gun sat between my fingers, threatening the innocent ahead. Destruction, Crime, Greed.

“Noah, let’s go,” Ruffilo pulled at my wrist in desperation. My arm remained still, resisting against his force.

The woman’s eyes watched me in horror, tears brimming as her back hit the brick wall behind her, arms wrapping protectively around her body in defeat.

My heart rapidly raced, but I remained still.

“I won’t say anything I swear,” She pleaded, lips trembling, saliva foaming from her mouth as she was too afraid to swallow.

I don’t want to do this, but I fucked up.

“Noah,” Ruffilo said through gritted teeth, “We need to go,” he placed a hand on top of my gloved one, in another attempt to have me lower the bad decision.

I closed my eyes, squeezing them shut in contemplation as my chest heaved, the voice of rationality fighting against the voice of destruction.

I’ll be even more of a fuck up if she rats on us.

You’ve never been able to kill anyone before you moron, why do you think this time will be any different?

My eyes snapped open, leatherd finger dancing along the trigger as I stared at her. My teeth barred through chapped lips, a snarl of frustration crawling from my throat. The woman's eyes turned away in fear as if watching her own demise would kill her. Ironic.

Seeing her in complete terror left me broken. Is who I am? I am nothing more.

The next thirty seconds passed as though I was walking through molasses, my thoughts battling contradictions before I audibly screamed in frustration, shoving the gun back into my pocket as Nicholas and I ran towards the van.

“Fuck!” I yelled, slamming the car door a forceful as possible. The tires squealed in place, burning out as Jolly’s foot pounded onto the gas pedal.

I ripped off my ski mask, throwing it angrily onto the floor of the vehicle.

“You should’ve just left her Noah. Now if they find us we could be charged with assault with a weapon.” The deep Swedish accent was the last thing I wanted to hear. He eyed me sternly in the rear view mirror. I lingered on his gaze for a moment before turning my head towards the window.

“Oh Fuck off Jolly,” I sighed angrily, closing my eyes as my breathing quickened, the anxiety beginning to set in. The pounding of my heart began to vibrate along my entire chest, and my leg bounced in anticipation, waiting for the panic to subside.

I kept justifying to myself that we’re all dead anyway, so what’s the difference between a God and a loaded gun?

+++++

I'll leave the prompt given below. Chapter one will be out later tn <3

“BUT what about a Noah fic where him and the boys grew up with a hard life, but they always stuck together. Growing up they got into a lot of trouble, and they are still struggling. So they all live in a little motel room together. Then one day Noah runs into reader, and she’s new to LA and she also grew up with a bad background but she got away from it and worked her ass off to get a nice little house in LA. So they talk for a bit and get along with each other, they swap numbers and stuff. Then one night it’s noah get money for him and the boys. So he decides to break into a house and just steal some stuff so he can sell it for money. BUT he ends up breaking into readers house by accident, and she catches him. She hurt and scared at first, but then she starts kind of sympathizing for him. He is apologizing profusely to her telling her he didn’t know it was her house, and basically they have a conversation about Noah’s life with the boys, and why he does what he does. And basically they end up falling for each other, and after a while reader realizes how lonely she is living in her house alone in LA with no friends. So she tells noah that him and the boys should move in with her, and she would help them find jobs and stuff. Eventually they agree, and then after they move in she notices how much they love music and that the two nicks both have old acoustic guitars that they occasionally play while Noah songs along. She works at a bar and then ends up getting them a gig at her work, and then after they play there a few times they start blowing up on the internet and getting popular, then eventually they get huge and go on tour. When they become famous they all convince reader to go on tour with them so they can start taking care of her like she did them when they needed it the most.”

#bad omens #noah sebastian #bad omens cult #bad omens band #noah sebastian davis #nick ruffilo #nicholas ruffilo #bad omens smut #noah sebastian smut #noah sebastian x reader #joakim jolly karlsson #nick folio #jolly karlsson #bad omens fanfiction #noah sebastian fanfiction

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anatrik · 1 month

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First thoughts TTPD:

What a lana x folklore girlie win this issss!

1.Fortnight is about matty?? HAHAHAHA also why did this make me think of when holt was going running with the ladies when he was in witness protection??? Crying. Fav line has to be they were supposed to take me away but they forgot to come and get me. So sad but also so cool in relation to her cancellation/return. 10/10

2. TTPD- not so hahahaha anymore IS THIS ACTUALLY A FUCKING MATTY HEALY ALBUM??? There was a typewriter at the 1975 show she performed anti-hero at? Unless its somehow about harry? Who else is tattooed on her roster??? Or is this about herself? Kinda feel like modern idiots/who’s going to decode is directed at us lol😂 9/10?

3.My boy only breaks his favourite toys- went in expecting mad woman rage. Pleasantly surprised. king of my heart to queen of sandcastles he destroys….DESTROYED ME. Are you fucking kidding me rn? Im caling it. Best song. Im crying at 7.30 am this is not funny anymore. Also THANK YOU FOR NOT SLANDERING DAD. I knew you wouldnt let us down like that. Also the chorus sounds like long story short😭 oh this is so sad. Once i fix me hes going to miss me? He was my best friend?😭 he runs because he loves me? Stopp😭😭 1000000/10

4.Down bad- ….aaaand we’re back to MATTY AGAIN? He does not deserve this spotlight but why are all the song so goood😭😭😭 is this why artists love to date problematic men? It unlocks some extraordinary potential? Crazy crazy girl😭 also stay down (bad) 🤌🏾 shes done it again 10/10 also for personal reasons i will be believing this is about joe in that Tom/Joe/met gala overlap period when she was photographed going to the gym a lot and that this is about all that yearning please let it be about that plesplesplesplesplesples also down bad waking up in blood staring at the sky…like i lost a twin is giving bigger than the whole sky🥺

5. So long, london- so so long long, lon-don DONE? ok miss girl😭 the hoax parallels😭 dont be undoing the song i was going to play at my weddddding what is wrong with you😭 my only one my smoking gun to two graves one gun youll find someone??? Also reminds me of la la land :/ how much sad did you think I had in me? You wrote hoax so a lot ok leave us alone. crying again. 10000000000000000/10 oh lol its a track 5 ofc it is😂

6. But daddy I love him- she really said if you ever liked, shared or even LOOKED at the ‘vivaa las vegas’ memes you cant come to the wedding and shes so real for it. Lfgggg. Ubothered unhinged uhmazing. Growing up precocious sometimes means you still hold on to that princess/quarterback wattpad fantasy AS IS YOUR RIGHT QUEEN GO THE FUCK OFF🥳 100000/10 calling out toxic fandom for the first time and we love to see it🫡 this is suchhhh a happy songggg you deserve ALL the chaos and revelry.

7. Fresh out the slammer- god she gets it. Like sure he was great and he is still my biological father and everything but as a decidedly melancholy person myself who has constantly had atleast one close friend in a deep depression I can see how all that heavy lifting can just get heavy at some point especially when youre a partner and their sole lighthouse in wtv storms be out there buffeting their mental health. Its not for everyone and thats so fair and so valid but so sad as well. 10/10 for the honesty.

8. Florida- she really said girlrot summer🫡 this is the lanaest song ever. So lucky one/nothing new coded. This will be the First song I repeat and then so long london. Aaaghhh how i love a self aware melancholic anxious little superstar. 90283749292/10 thank you for giving florence an entire verse whew. Little did you know your home’s really only a town you’re just a guest in is soooo going on my body forever

9. Guilty as sin?- honestly just fuck if it means we dont have to hear about how desirable ratty healy is man ffs. IThe only reason he looks so hot is bc hes forbidden. You have to trust me on this. He’s sooo mid JESUS. U cant be writing hozier lyrics about a man that hasn’t met a shower😭 1000000/10 writing. -16392992/10 content. Unrequited love/lust truly is the greatest weapon in a poets arsenal bc where is this energy in the joe songs binch?😭 this is such a teen in love with a 26 yo creep who called me so mature for my age mom you just dont get ittt anthem😂😂

10. Who’s afraid of little old me?- is a warning 😂 im so here for it. Like yes I still hate matty with all my heart and soul but yes I agree fans should not be allowed so much of an opinion on another persons life and yes I should be afraid (I am). She said aight love letter era over I AM WRITING YOU ALL HATE MAIL AND I’M HAND DELIVERING IT. Shes sooo done pretending to be the relatable girl next door when she’s anything but and is now reminding us of it and yes yes yessss girl OWN ITTTTTTTT. I’ve been saying for agesssss that there is a darkness under all that sunshine from where she clawed her way to the top and this is sooo vindicating. 10000000000000/10 favourite song ever. Mad woman wishes she was who’s afraid of little old me. I am unwell. I am in love. This is the Taylor Swift i stan. The marketing genius the calculating business woman the puppet master with narcotics in her songs thats why we sing along🫡 she so can handle a dangerous man

11. I can fix him (no really I can)- you cant.

12. loml- ofc. OFC. Its the saddest song of all time. OFC. Fuck offf ughhhh. 😭😭😭😭😭 its giving happiness. Its giving divorce. i am a child of a broken home now and my parents still love each other and hold so much regret still. What do i do with thissss? Im just a little girl taylorrr! 1002380292011010101/10 soo so gooood.

13. I can do it with a broken heart- first of all track 13. Love it. Second of all the upbeat barbieness of it all. Third of all I FINALLY PLACED IT. Shes in her unrelatable era. She is not your girl next door. You will never understand her life. She is as much a phenomenon as a person and we literally only see as much as she allows us to and honestly if i have to get put in my place theres noooo better way to have it done. Im having such a great time actually. 10 BILLION TRILLION OUT OF 10 you tellll em girl you FUCKING TELL EM.

14. Smallest man who ever lived- not going to speculate on who it is bc they clearly had a serious problem and its not a joke but damn :/ thats so sad :/ hope they get help? Didnt expect this to be what the song was about at all?

15. The alchemy- she said TRAVIS IS MY BOY WITH HER WHOLE CHEST😌 10/10

16. Clara bow- did she just name drop herself ? I was so right about unrelatable era. Also the Subtle nod to olivia/sabrina noted and appreciated. Lucky one/castles crumbling (mature version) fr fr. Solid legacy song.

17. The black dog- shared your secrets with and location is the same whiplash as a red rose grew up out of ice frozen ground with no one around to tweet it🤌🏾 joe songs hit so so different 😭😭😭 1000000000/10

18. imgonnagetyouback- the valiant roar was not so valiant and more of a mew i guess. 7/10

19. The albatross- oh this is the ONE. The album defining song for sureeee. Mad woman on coke. A rose by any other name is a scandal???? Thats my religion right there. Little last great American dynasty twist there at the end! Fuck yea. She does reallly try to warn the men in her life have to give her that. One gazillion/10

20. Clearly god has favourites and they are the ppl called chloe or sam or sophia or marcus😭 ALSO this song is about joe for sure. The internet starlet hasss to be delaney rowe!!!! It HAS TO BE. 10/10

21. How did it end?- shes back for the fans😂 plot twist the breakup is with yall🤌🏾 but yesss say it louder! One gasp and then how did it end. So good. 100/10

22. So high school- lmao aristotle grand theft auto ONLYY taylor swift man😭😂 you know what you want and boy you got her🫡🫡 11/10

23. I hate it here- mother’s having a mental breakdown kids yk the drill🤌🏾 10/10

24. ThanK you aIMiee- what better way to say fuck you to a hater than to thank her for jumpstarting your legacy my god!!! She is insane for this. The capitalisation is a bit petty tho ngl. 8/10

25. I look in peoples windows- once again I thank you for the kindness and respect shown to joe. Never doubted you but thank you nevertheless. 10/10 short as nice to have a friend but it didnt need to be longer.

26. The prophecy- its so sad and humbling to see even a woman at where she is having to beg for love bc that literally is the nature of love. Something humiliating, to have to beg for 🤷‍♀️ cards playing out like fools in a fable cursed like eve got bitten. No one writes like her damn. 10/10

27. Cassandra- very madeline miller on this one. Love love loveee modern takes on tragic greek women. 100/10

28. Peter- ah fuck. This one is going to hurt (it did). 1000000/10 my ribs get the feeling she did😭 all her joe related aches are so bone deeeep ugh. Promises oceans deep but never to keep😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 oh god it hurtsss it hurts it hurtss

29. The bolter- curious child ever reviled except by her father wow.

30. Robin- OMG! I needed this song growing up sooo bad. That way to go tiger felt so so warm like running into a kitchen after a day of being in the mud and u tell ur mum the silly things u did and shes genuinely interested and impressed by your smol victories. A bajillion/10

31. The manuscript- postmortem of every ex ever🤌🏾 love it.

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dozing-marshmallow · 9 months

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waiiit hear me out, chris with a yandere reader headcanons

(also i just realized im just spamming your entire inbox full, my bad actually😭🙏)

Now that’s a rare concept! 😳 You always give fun requests so please don’t worry! Thank you, and enjoy! :)

CHRIS MCLEAN X YANDERE! READER HEADCANONS

Chris can’t help being rich, hot and successful.

So it’s only normal that he’d have a fair, if not, larger share than most people of dealing with fan behaviour, especially of those who made it their life’s purpose to know everything there was to him; fantasies of marriage also being very popular among these goals.

Hence why when you in particular acted up in such way, he didn’t think much about it for he’d already seen it many times in the past.

Besides, he loved the attention. To have someone devote their entire lives to him and see it in action...

“Ohhh Chris! Your body is the sculpture of angels!”

“Yes it is! Tell me something I don’t know.”

“I want to crush it into a jar and use a bit of your flavour every day as a bar of soap!”

“...”

You are not at all like his past interactions- you’re worse.

From the position of his assistant, which is more sucky on his part, since you were employed by the network itself, so he can’t get you fired easily.

No biggie! He’ll use your maddening devotion to him to carry out his biddings, from something as simple as getting him coffee(never needing to tell you his order) to something as vile as murder.

Yknow with his interns? Yeah. If anyone gets in trouble, it won’t be added to his record.

Somehow, every time he tried convincing himself there was nothing to be alarmed about, you would stray further away from your humanity.

“I can’t wait for you to die so I can take your skin and turn it into my one of a kind Chris McLean duvet! That way, I’ll always feel your warm embrace.”

“Haha yeah... I’ll always feel yours too...”

He nicknamed you “Sierra 2.0”- not to your face.

You understood how loveable your darling was and how he was a necessity to the world than you were to him.

Buuuut you would appreciate something in return if you were going to do all this for him in such a close proximity.

“I’ll give you a suuuuper big peck on the cheek if you do this right. You know how happy it’ll make me.” he winked.

Well, besides from that.

It was like he died already!

“Oh Chris... Why are you holding out on me? Is there something new about you that I have yet to learn? Why do you hesitate to love me? Are you embarrassed to be seen with me?”

“Kinda. Stalkers aren’t really my type, but please, don’t stop the attention.”

“Stalker?! No no Chris. I’m not a stalker! I’m your true love! I’ve torn myself apart to serve you as the noble thing you are! I worship you morning and night, I lick your dirty laundry clean, I give you the organs of everyone you ask of in heart shaped boxes, I even had one of your interns carve your figure into my back!” You take your shirt off and turn around, revealing the bloodied outline of his perfect body burning in your skin.

Okay, he loved his face being on anything possible.

But what the hell.

“You...love me a lot, huh?” What would happen if he took his sight off you to blink?

You turn back around, with that smile still drooling on your own face,“And it wasn’t just any blade he used... It was the blade you keep on you. So after he was done...I took it and...did things with it... You’re the most beautiful thing on this earth Chris, I can’t imagine how dull it would be if you were never born... I had to have you in me one way or another...”

You know what...

Having a second look, it was actually appealing. Of course it’d be! It’s him. Wait...why was he even freaking out? He doesn’t care about what happens to you! You chose to do this to yourself, in his image, in his honour and he didn’t even need to lift a finger. Exactly! This is just what was expected of a person like you to resort to when they’re constantly around someone as good looking as h-

“Should I have him carve me into you now?” You suggest, face as hot as a Bunsen burner.

“N-No, please! I’m good.” He raised his hands up in front of his chest.

You pause.

“Of course... How selfish of me. I shouldn’t be asking you, my love, to do anything that’s not from your free will. I don’t have the right to trap you or force you to do anything, I can’t do that to someone I love... You’d be selling yourself short if I won you over that easily anyway...” you drop your face into his chest,“Oh Chris McLean... You’re too aristocratic for anybody in this world. No one could ever be remarkable as you. I’m so lucky...I got to be from the same generation as you.”

...He pushes you away,“Yeah...sooo...personal space. Please.”

How ironic it was, a time when you were actually sane kicked in his adrenaline.

Ring ring.

“Yoooo Cody. Codemeister. How you been, buddy? Good? Greaaaat. How’s that therapist? Any good? Cuz I might need you to reference me...”

#td chris #tdi x reader #total drama chris mclean #tdi #td chris mclean x reader #chris mclean x reader #chris mclean #total drama island chris #request #total drama #yandere reader #yandere

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stormyoceans · 4 months

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The clock on the wall of the restaurant was still showing the same time, for the third time Mhok had checked. He glanced down at his phone - no, it hadn't broken; Mhok was just impatient. And his phone screen was blank as ever.

He sighed, and returned to mopping the floor. Maybe all of this hard work would get him a raise soon, if his new boss noticed. That would be worth it.

His pocket began buzzing, and Mhok felt a fond smile beginning before he even had the phone out. Sure enough, the screen was lit with his boyfriend’s name.

"Good evening," he said, warm and low into the receiver. "If you'd like to place an order, I'm sorry, but the restaurant is closed."

Something in Mhok seemed to settle and relax, just hearing his boyfriend’s voice on the other end of the line. "I'm sorry, Phi," said Day, explaining about his family and the unexpected change of their plans.

Mhok had guessed that it would be something like this; actually, it could have been worse. He should probably feel grateful Day could call at all. He hummed, and told him not to worry. "I'll just have to be better next year," he murmured, with a self-deprecating smirk, "so Santa will be nicer to me."

Day's voice dipped a little lower. "Let's say that Santa is listening right now," said the younger boy. "What would you ask for?"

Mhok barely hesitated, certain of the only thing he wanted - the thing he'd want even if he had everything else in the world. "I'd want to be with you right now," he almost whispered, with the ghost of a sigh.

"...The moon is beautiful tonight. Wouldn't you say?"

Mhok's heart leapt into his throat, beating with a sudden wild hope. He wished so much... and there was only one way to know.

He moved instantly to the restaurant doors, pushing them open with firm, calloused hands, and knowing exactly the person he wanted to see.

And for a moment, for just one breath of a moment -

He'd breached a different threshold, in a different place, while something like deja vu made the faint glimmer of hope in his stomach into an endless star-filled canopy, millions of constellations strong. And his steps were uncertain, but his heart knew who to look for... the shape of this memory held a different face, and the word on his lips was a different name, but it was the same moment, somehow, the same longing, the same unbearable separation finally ending, this time for sure, two souls coming home, like magnets across a universe -

He blinked, and the moment was entirely his own, once more. Just a passing thought, an odd trick of the light in the courtyard, and it didn't matter anyway.

Because he saw Day, his Day, just as he'd wished.

"Day," Mhok breathed, his heart full. He swallowed past the sudden knot in his throat, blinking away the tears that gathered inexplicably in his eyes.

"Merry Christmas," said Day, smiling at him.

---

(it's me again, hi 👋 after ep 10 i had to send this too hope you enjoy 🤍)

SLACK JAWED SHAKING OUT OF MY SKIN CRYING SHITTING YELLING AT THE TOP OF MY LUNGS FOAMING AT THE MOUTH SPINNING COUNTERCLOCKWISE ON THE FLOOR WAILING WEEPING HOWLING SCREECHING EATING GLASS GOING INTO CARDIAC ARREST MAKING A LOBOTOMY APPOINTMENT CRAWLING TOWARDS THE EDGE OF THE HIGH RISE BUILDING IM ABOUT TO THROW MYSELF OFF OF ASCENDING ONTO A HIGHER SPHERE OF HUMAN CONSCIOUSNESS

ANON IM ONCE AGAIN SAYING THIS IN THE MOST AFFECTIONATE AND ADORING WAY POSSIBLE BUT YOU ARE - INDEED - INSANE. THIS IS MADNESS. LUNACY. DERANGEMENT. LITERALLY CAN WE HAVE A TALK. CAN WE HAVE A CONVERSATION. A DISCUSSION EVEN. YOU DID NOT JUST MAKE MORK HAVE A VISION OF PUEN OPENING THE DOOR OF THE GLASS HOUSE AND FINALLY FINDING TALAY AFTER HE CAME BACK FROM THE OTHER UNIVERSE. AS IF DAY'S SIDE BACK IN EPISODE 4 DIDN'T ALREADY RUIN ME. CURRENTLY IN A DEAD FAINT IN FRONT OF MY SCREEN EXPERIENCING THE ENTIRE RANGE OF HUMAN EMOTIONS LIKE

"the shape of this memory held a different face, and the word on his lips was a different name, but it was the same moment, somehow, the same longing, the same unbearable separation finally ending, this time for sure, two souls coming home, like magnets across a universe" <<< I CAN'T EVEN. FORMULATE [ISABELLE ADJANI TUNNEL SCENE FROM POSSESSION] [FEMALE HYSTERIA] [SUICIDE]

#NOT TO REPEAT MYSELF BUT READING THESE TWO FICLETS SIDE BY SIDE IS INSANE I FEEL INSANE #THE PARALLELS #THE WAY THEY COMPLEMENT EACH OTHER SO PERFECTLY #ANON I LOVE YOU BUT I HOPE YOU KNOW THE REASON IT TOOK ME SO LONG TO REPLY IS BECAUSE I'VE BEEN GOING INTO SHOCK GOING OFF THE RAILS #GOING BATSHIT GOING ABSOLUTE CUCKOO BANANAS OVER THIS #I WILL BE DEAD IN A DITCH SOMEWHERE GOOD DAY OR GOOD NIGHT TO ALL NEVERTHELESS #last twilight the series #morkday #vice versa #puentalay #m: ask

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wrenwreakinghavoc · 5 months

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I would love to hear your thoughts on Nosk if you ever got the time to erite about it. Your artwork of it was a delight; I loved Ghost being lit up in orange. 10/10 lighting!

First of all - THANK YOU SM FOR THE COMPLIMENTS!! I haven't tried shading like this in. Months, like I said

Second of all

WELCOME TO MY PRESENTATION

(Also thanks for the excuse to draw my Vessel sona)

Don't get me wrong I don't hate Nosk, they're one of my favorite characters in Hollow Knight and media in general. I absolutely adore the concept behind them and the SUSPENSE through those tunnels leading to the big reveal still remains one of my favorite scenes to come back to in HK. The design and concept behind them is very neat and the overall feeling of that first time you enter the arena and see that cutscene is just. Wonderful.

That said, my issues are all about the actual fight. Specifically the attacks.

Nosk has arguably one of the most interesting buildups to a fight in HK, and is in one of the most creepy areas of the game, considering the arena and atmosphere of the fight too, I was expecting this to be a hard boss. I was expecting really difficult and potentially creepy attacks. The OST is one of the most anxiety inducing tracks in the game. Yet the entire fight just amounts to them.. running around? Occasionally jumping onto the ceiling? It feels like a rip off.

Nosk literally only has three attacks and they're all easy to dodge/cheese, if they were just small parts of the fight, it'd be fine, but instead 50% of the fight is just Nosk running across the arena, which is easy to dodge with or without the use of hiding under the platform(still one of the funniest ways to cheese a fight honestly).

Nosk has a bunch of hanging CORPSES in their den, so I thought that maybe they'd have a close up attack where if you got too close it'd trigger them swiping close range, kind of like this:

Extremely low budget explanation but STILL

The attack with screaming and the infection getting everywhere? NICE! Nosk on the ceiling shooting orange juice at you? GREAT! But the fact those are basically the only two good attacks in this fight with THREE really just. It weighs it down for me man.

By this point in the game(I mean I had to Google where Nosk was since I only saw art of them on my first playthrough since they're hidden), plenty of bosses had phases, too. I feel like the fight could've easily been more anxiety inducing if they had a few phases.

For example:

Phase one - same as current fight + close range attack

Phase two - running attack happens less, potential variations of other attacks, speed up things a bit

Phase three - more orange juice, maybe webs(since that's how the other creatures in the background appear to be captured), could potentially do some jumping version of the running attack(like jumping around the arena aggressively making them harder to do damage to without being hit)?

I'm obviously not a game designer, but I do like rambling about things and potential ideas that could happen to make things better.

The Nosk fight on its own isn't even terrible, it's just the fact that it doesn't live up to the buildup of the way to the fight and the cutscene in the beginning, let alone the absolute panic the OST makes me feel.

Oh and don't even get me STARTED on Winged Nosk. HOW DO YOU MAKE SOMETHING LESS TERRIFYING BY ADDING WINGS IM IN GENUINE SHOCK

I know I probably repeated myself a lot and this is very scattered, but I hope that you somehow enjoyed seeing me ramble aggressively about a fight in a silly bug game that I think has issues anyway.

In conclusion Nosk has an amazing concept, design, OST, atmosphere, and some alright attacks, but really could've benefitted from some more attacks/phases.

I wrote more about this fight than I did for my English essay on Thursday so I don't know what that says about me but do with that what you will

#hollow knight #hk #nosk hk #hk nosk #man i love text walls have fun reading this #ask

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kohakun · 2 years

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title » confession hcs

pairing » kohaku oukawa x gn!reader

requested? » yes

genre » fluff

a/n » i love kohaku so much, im so happy i got a request for my boy <3 i hope i did alright with representing his accent and stuff

✧ kohaku wouldn't really notice his feelings while you two were online friends, it was only when you two met in person and when he could witness your pretty smile in front of him that the loud beating of his heart became apparent to him.

✧ and then he suddenly became aware of all the signs; the way he would excitedly check his phone in the morning in hopes that he had gotten a good morning message from you, the way he was disappointed when he got a notification for a message only to find it wasn't from you and the giddy smile that adorned his face whenever he was texting or calling you.

✧ his feelings were quite obvious honestly, to everyone but you. so of course, the rest of crazy:b found out about his crush on you. as one could expect, rinne was teasing the boy to death, niki kept asking him questions about you and himeru was surprised that you had managed to charm kohaku but still supported him nonetheless.

✧ eventually, rinne managed to egg on kohaku enough to convince him to confess. kohaku decided to take a fairly traditional approach, so he planned to buy flowers to give you as he was confessing and he also prepared an extensive speech about his feelings for you because he thinks that you deserve nothing but sincerity and dedication.

✧ he had asked you to meet him after school, just like how niki advised him to do. he could be seen nervously practicing his speech over and over again while tightly holding the bouquet of dark red, almost burgundy, carnations he had bought.

✧ and yet no matter how hard he had practiced, the moment he saw you? his coherency was reduced to nothing and his mind blanked out. when you stood in front of him, the only thing he could do was extend his arm that was holding the bouquet while looking away from you. yes, you could still see the blush on his face.

✧ you gratefully accepted the flowers, slightly confused at the occasion. you thanked him and then asked him why exactly he asked you to come here to give you a bouquet. oh, how stupid you could be. he sputtered out a few sentences that weren't entirely comprehensible in response. the only words you could really make out from his sentences were "today" "confess", "in person", "pretty" and "crowd".

✧ you still somehow didn't connect the dots (or maybe you did and you just wanted to mess with him), so you asked him to repeat what he said and he took a deep breath before looking you shyly making eye contact with you and saying;

✧ "i asked you to come here today because,, i wanted to confess to ya. i've had these feelings for a long, long time but i didn't notice 'em until i got to see you in person. i found myself thinkin' about how pretty you are and looking for you in every crowd at my performances,, i also found myself constantly smilin' whenever you were around and being happier. i got ya these flowers because they symbolise deep love and affection. i,, i hope you like them."

✧ literally how could you not melt after hearing all that? he quickly turned his face away from you again and started rambling that he doesn't mind if you don't reciprocate his feelings and that you two could still be friends.

✧ you cut him off with a tight hug and he just about malfunctioned. he was profusely blushing and you were scared that you might've broken him. he stiffly reciprocated your hug and you just kissed his cheek, happily saying that yes, you did in fact reciprocate his feelings.

✧ the hug, cheek kiss and confession combo really wasn't good for his heart and he got even redder, if that was possible. he was incredibly relieved but also very flustered at your close proximity.

✧ to be honest, you really couldn't imagine what would've happened if you had gone for a kiss on the lips. he probably would've passed out.

#yun writes #kohaku oukawa #kohaku x reader #kohaku oukawa x reader #ensemble stars #enstars #enstars x reader #ensemble stars x reader

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longhands-the-second · 10 months

Text

Trimax vol. 5

This is a solid 30% “what will they do with this in Stampede?”

1- “this time of year”… what are seasons like there? Are they distinct at all???

OH. YIKES. JULY. I was wondering why we were starting here.

God, I hate to think of how many people Vash has lost over the years.

For him to openly weep is heartbreaking, knowing how often he just shuts down instead.

Im fucking stoked to see what they do with midvalley in stampede, if anything.

Meryl is leaving this whole thing fundamentally changed i think. Just a hunch.

2- This is maybe a little unclear? I see the vision though.

I fucking love manga milly you go girl

GOD DAMN IT VASH he keeps getting hit and it makes me sad

Ballerina wolfwood

Am. Am i gonna start simping for wolfwood now? Is this how it happens?

3- oh. Oh boy. That sure is a title page

I’m still so mad they stole ww’s nose in stampede. It’s so pretty.

Wolfwood being protective of people. That is all. :)

OH OH OH ITS HAPPENING EVERYBODY STAY CALM STAY FUCKING CALM

This is the first time that we’ve seen this w/o Knives’ direct involvement- is this something that just happens when he’s at his wit’s end? Has it happened before? (Is it just compounding recent events???)

Bevridge Bitch is here and his vibes are as rancid as ever

How recent was July? He has most of the same scars.

Man they really just took the sleeve off of his coat. Worst thing that happens here, surely (<- coping)

Nvm the sleeve magically reappeared.

Girl seriously though what the *Fuck*

Could he just not do it before? Is this knives doing it *for* him???

“Seeds”?

Oh no. Oh this is even worse than last time. Ick.

Somehow this is more explicitly uh. Y’know.

EW EW EW EW

Dude phrase that literally any other fucking wayyyyyy I’m screaming crying throwing myself out of the window

Vash didn’t answer. I think this is the only iteration that wouldn’t. Then again that might be entirely circumstantial.

DAMN.

4- I took a week long break after the last chapter. I WAS ahead but uh. Stuff and things. So i may have some rereading to do.

SO WAIT HOLD ON DOES TOUCHING THE FEATHERS LET YOU SEE HIS MEMORIES AND SHIT?

I wonder if wolfwood’s gotten his sight back? Is that gonna be recurring or was it just a brief thing?

God this is so fucked up. Poor Meryl is probably losing it

Midvalley continues to fascinate me. What he’s saying makes sense but like. Damn.

Oh fucking god damn it get this guy out of here i don’t want him

What the hell am i even looking at right now

LEGATO YOU BASTARD

5- i hate to say it but i was kind of rooting for midvalley? I wanted to see more of him at least. Fuckin brutal way to go.

Oh is this why zazie is like. Extra androgynous in stampede? Fully support this actually.

I don’t think any character gets under my skin the way legato does. Knives is a close second, but there’s just something about the type of cruelty he exhibits. It’s not quick or to the point. He lets that shit simmer on purpose. It’s not about power anymore, it’s about maximum suffering. For himself, too. It’s gross.

MERYL!!!!

Legato sticks his leggy out real far. Fr though those are spindly as all hell

I’m not sure how much of the angel arm use is Vash making a conscious decision? Guess we’ll find out later. (EDIT: or not damn. He’s so quiet about it.)

Ah. Elendira. Will i love you or hate you?

6- i swear i can feel the panic coming off of the page here

I wonder how much more shit happened with knives that we just haven’t seen yet. How much of it does Vash remember?

Is this happening in his head right now? Is that why his arm is extra fucked up?

I find myself wondering at this moment if the original japanese was more or less derogatory about elendira and tbh i’m just gonna stop thinking about it now.

I can already tell im gonna be obsessed with her dynamic with knives though. They both seem so over it in a way that i can only describe as “the only two queer people working at the McDonald’s.” This is in no way related to any personal experiences i may have had, pinky promise. (Me and that manager were like. Work besties.)

She’s so fucked up i love her already.

UGH UGH UGH BE NICE TO HIM DAMN IT.

EXPLAIN YOURSELF TO THEM MAN. (He’s not obligated to but holy shit do you know how much that had to fuck Meryl up?)

Yeah, i see where the japanese Rem headcanon comes from. The vibes are there.

End notes (semi related to the actual content):

- I am DYING to know how they’ll deal with the Earth ships. Can’t just start that plot thread and just destroy them. I mean, it could happen, but like. Why?

- Forever yelling about biblically accurate Vash. I’ll draw him at some point given the time and energy. I REALLY want to know how/if they’ll handle it in stampede- we sort of got it, sort of didn’t? I’d love to see that pushed further.

- I WILL FINALLY POST ANOTHER GOD DAMN COLORING THIS WEEK. It took me a full month so it’s from an earlier volume but i’m very excited to share! It *should* be done by Friday (questionable way to celebrate given the content) ((maybe I’ll post vash in the babygirl pose as a treat)).

- I got my silly little wwvd bracelet and wore it with my Vash cosplay this last weekend. It genuinely makes me smile every time i see it lol. Real mood booster through con crunch, too. (Also, shoutout to the vash cosplayers at akaicon who definitely won’t see this lol. I almost asked them if they were in on the bookclub based on conversations we had but I chickened out.)

#trigunbookclub

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bitterbelphie · 2 months

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{{ these are some notes for myself mostly dont mind them fjdjfj

that said, i am still alive! blogs not dead i am just throttled irl but i am out here. i am out here. im just very overwhelmed. i am thinking about belphie but have bumbled my goofy ass into some writing issues i want to put down somewhere that wont get lost fjdj so. so. }}

point one;

belphie is one of the most socially involved characters i've ever had in my hands wherein his relationships are so close and impactful on him, and that's considerable! he doesnt know or deal with a billion people all at the same time, but he DOES live with six brothers and a human, and has to worry about others (two angels, one other human, two other Very Big Deal demons) at least occasionally. i have an understanding why the writing team sometimes feels really very rushed the further they go on with obey me im going to be real with you NGJSJF

again, it isn't just the number or proximity; belphies brothers are really very impactful on him, not just in past tense but in the ways they interact with each other, the ways they bicker or support each other or even the human, how belphie perceives these things. he's a more introverted character, but just as he's notorious for his introversion (sometimes levi calls him a fellow shut-in, and hes declined outings several times unless they suited his own needs and interests specifically [before being forced anyway usually]) he's also notorious for watching and listening to the ways the others talk about what's going on, each other, TO each other, how their bonds strengthen or weaken. he's very sensitive to being replaced or forgotten about, or treated as though he's dangerous or like someone doesn't know how to interact with him anymore after the attic incident.

all this to say, to write a rich and satisfying belphie, takes shaking off a lot more rust and getting used to writing several characters in a situation all at the sams time, which i've for some reason been very squirrely to do??? like i'm not allowed or something???? up to the challenge, if only for breaking this very strange sensation of 'oh thats not allowed ):' ON WHAT PLANET. WHEN AND WHY DID THAT HAPPEN

point two;

winter.... oh winter. precious MC stand in. what am i going to do with you.

obviously the mc in a romancey otome game is supposed to move the story along in a way that's as generic and projectable as possible. there's still some personality there; a character that drives an entire family of fallen angels who've had repeated fallings out and coming together again moments and unites them is going to be a sort that's strong in mind and in heart, sure. this is a protagonist in a mushy gushy love game with some edge paint slapped over the top; something i love quite a bit, mind you, but... there's so much blank slate, and so much freedom.

what. am i going to do with you. somehow i did not anticipate The Main Character being something so potentially useful, but also requiring their own good bit of attention. so i should think about where they've been yoinked from and how that helps them adapt to the environment they're in. the mc also has quite the unique relationship with belphie, given the whole murder thing, and subsequent "oh btw the entire reason you did that? built on a lie. yeah everything you justified that with wasn't real. yeah now you both have to cope with that. and each other. yeah."

so winter being a big deal is sort of a big deal in itself. they both have made huge impacts on each other, and belphie's forfeited to them some of his JUST-FOUND FREEDOM to START his apology and that's. i mean god damn. winter knows he'd been trapped a long time, winter knows he'd been lied to, but that his feelings of neglect and betrayal aren't gone... but that also doesn't mean they're just fine now, either. he murdered their ass and he tried to do it again until he was told the truth and broke down as it sunk in fjdj not even immediately.

they have a lot of questions for one another, but also a lot of tension. delicious mix. how much i would love to really do something with that.

very good to get this out of my brain and somewhere i'll find it again fjdjgj

maybe ill noodle around with this??? try to practice some things and lean into that early canon feel i liked so much and base some things off canon events. augh please understand how much this sleepy freak lives rent free in my brain space even though i am so so quiet. trying to get unfrozen in so many ways

#ooc

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pool-floatie · 3 months

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(Working title)Part 3: I rewrote the last part cause I hated the other one-

Sexy vampire fic go brrrr-

Yeah i was gonna post this on valentines but the other one seemed cuter (also this was not done haha-)

📢Just an FYI the next chapter will contain mouthplay and vore elements! None in here though! (but oh god the fearplay 😳)

But here we go, more eepy vampire shit :D

(wren pov)

Dropped into the metal prizon, Wren jumped at the sharp snap that sealed their fate, scooting as far back into the metal walls as they could, they crammed themself into a corner with only their injured leg sticking out.

They stared warily, not sure what the shadowy figure wanted with them.

The cold metal beneath them stung on bits of exposed skin through the rips in their pants, but it felt kind of nice on their injuries, especially their leg.

Their leg... Wren looked at the gash, noticing a decrease in the throbbing pain, and saw their wound was .... Healing? The bleeding had stopped somehow, and all the scrapes they had sustained around the injury were gone as well...

Wren puzzled at this, glancing back to see their captor reading some book, as if their miniature kidnapping victim was second priority, but wren was glad its attention wasnt focused on them for just a moment.

Why were they healing so fast? They'd sustained a pretty shitty injury once when their hand got scraped on their hook, and that bled like a bitch and took weeks to heal! Why now had their miraculous healing powers emerged ?

(Narrator)

Borrowers: small, sentient, magical beings that live inside building walls in small families or communities, feeding on scraps and leftovers from the inhabitants and using "borrowed" material to craft intricate nests.

If extracted correctly their magic can be used in spells, curses, charms and even recipies!

Well, that explained why it was outside a bakery, Lazarus wasnt sure what the "extraction" required, not that he would nessecarily need it.. But it did explain why this creatures taste had been so enticing...

His eyes turned to the little thing, seeming to be focused on its leg.

"should be healing a bit by now, yes ?" he spoke, appearing in front of the desk in an instant.

The borrower jumped at his sudden closeness.

Pausing for a moment, it regained its composure.

Looking up at Lazarus, it spoke.

" wh- why-is.."

"it's just a convenient feature we have.. Helps avoid detection." he said.

The borrower looked even more confused

"what- what are you...?" it questioned.

Oh, Well he supposed they wouldnt know much of other creatures, needing to stay hidden and all that..

Hmmm..

" That is... quite a good question, Dear. In truth, Im not entirely sure myself, Its been quite a long time..."

He trailed off, zoning out for a few seconds.

"..In any case, You may call me Lazarus."

He gave a small bow and waited for a response, when none came he tried to prompt the little thing.

"Would I be correct in assuming you have a name as well?"

He questioned

Oh right- "W-wren"

They stammered.

"Wren.... lovely name, pleasure to meet you, Dear"

Lazarus flashed a half smile down at his captive.

"I still, I kn-ow you- you aren't human..."

"Hmm... "

Lazarus thought momentarily.

"Well,,,, I guess I should explain."

Lazarus pulled out a small wooden stool, plopping himself down.

"You may have heard stories of mysterious 'humans' who roam only at night, clad in dark clothing that partially hides a pale complexion. Some are mistaken as human, smart enough in dress and makeup to pass themselves, others perfer solitude for the most part, not wishing to bother with society.

Now of course, humans love their tall tales- of creatures like them that stalk human prey by night-"

wren gasped

" and hide themselves away in the daylight. They call those individuals 'Vampires'.

Better still, humans are dumb enough to believe that the old myths of bloodthirsty beings were just that, myths,,, though an unlucky few discover our secret~."

Lazarus' gaze drifted back to wren on the last sentence.

"you- you're -"

Wren paled, they were captured by-

"Haha, seems youve caught on then, hmm?"

Wren looked up into the vampires Maroon eyes, the shadowy room shrouding his sharp features made him look even more ghastly, they shuddered.

" are you..." they whispered, taking a breath they spoke up.

"A-re you going- to let me go?

#g/t #giant/tiny #my art #fanfic #gt art #g/t fearplay #micro/macro #giant #tiny #giant vampire #Good god im blushing at my own writing

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darkestpsi · 1 year

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when i say that i like both dabi and shouto i dont mean it in the "oh my god they're so hot i wanna fuck them" kinda way or the "lol they both hate their parents just like me fr" way but that i really do understand how its like to grow up around such tough, hard love. to have your entire worth, the level of care and responsiveness you receive in moments you definitely should not be seeking this constant validation but your fucking veggies and milk - all of that being based off just how useful you can be to your parents; being told that the point of your life quite literally is for the fulfilment of thEIR dreams, in THEIR way, under THEIR supervision, yknow?

like, i can literally not even begin to count the many recordings on loop i have of my mums voice in my head telling me to always be better and to do so much more, be so much more - achieve things, great things and live to just please and please and please - for herself, for her dead mother (who probably doesnt even care about half of the shit that i have done since she passed, because dead people cant feel - they cant feel, but somehow their presence still suffocates), for the status and the level of respect itll give both her and my dad (so that they wont ever be referred to as immigrants again) and the amount of money ill eventually get paid thatll somewhat, somehow all go back to them, anyway.

point is, dropping so suddenly from being so loved and praised and shown off when you were younger and tried your hardest to be that bit better to the broken toy you are now, unable to carry out their tasks - demands, even - easily replaced by someone younger, someone so much better than you; worth so much more than you. when they are born.

idk.

i joke alot about how similar my family dynamic is to the todorokis, the distance between me and my siblings now after all it was that we went through together and how im literally doing medicine for my parents so that they can get their doctor, and i can get my peace, but its very truly something ive had no control over my whole entire life. all ive wanted is some damn control. lmao. my mum literally named me after a doctor she saw on tv who was giving a lecture about medicine and i laugh at the fucking irony of it all because god, you dont even realise that this is fucking killing me, ma- but the thing with touya, the parts of him that diverge from my own experiences is the fact that he was able to break free from all of those restraints secured by his family, the goals they set him, the ones he set himself. the guilt and disappointment and oh my god, how could you -why - why would you regret not being able to meet those expectations and him being thrown aside like everything he ever received was so palpable and fleeting because he was a toy, was always a toy to my mum endeavor. he knew he couldnt compete with shouto. shouto the gifted child. the hero. the hate and anger he feels towatds him, idk, it hits so fucking close to home. but i also see so much of myself in the way shouto is so fucking willing to be the good child, the perfect child, who pleases and pleases and pleases; doing everything he is supposed to without retalliation because thats what hes supposed to do and thats what they want him to do and eventually, someday, somewhere he will get his peace as a hero, because he was "born to be the best", born to be a doctor hero - literally both sides of my personality at war oh my god AAAAA

i literally can not help but attach myself to those characters.

#bnha #mha #vent #because i am so full of rage #yes i am the quote on quote #eldest daughter #dabi #shouto todoroki #todoroki family #bnha touya

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pinkmoondoll9shihtzu · 2 years

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bladee show summary:

(putting under read more cus its Long)

☯️ he sang so many songs from the fool, a couple mechatoks, but also a lot of songs from red light n exeter. it was a good balance...he did imaginary from exeter which was so ethereal.. and botox lips ?!?!? we were all stunned he pulled that one out

💟 crowd was so fun and happy,. big sense of camaradarie. i was standing there for like an hour b4 the set started to secure my spot so i overheard lots of funny stuff. there was a guy who wld hold up a copy of halo 3 and everyone would start chanting HALO 3!!! HALO 3!!!!

🛐 (this is the most insane part of the whole show for me.) so, like 2 hours before the set, it started to get rly cloudy. n i thought to myself, yea, its gonna rain for bladee's set, it just has to! waiting, waiting, the clouds getting darker but still no rain. then about 5 mins before his set begins, light raindrops. i was like haha...ok.. here we go... he comes on, and first song he plays is the fool intro. and it was like, as soon as it came on, it started POURING. and then, there's that lyric:

and as he sang it he just like smiled and shrugged and i was like oh. my god. its clicking. he summoned this?!'?,?! he summoned this, like, he made it rain for us. and magic is real. i was too overwhelmed to even cry, but i cry now processing it. we drained the sky & the sky drained us. how could i even try to put it into words. it was just angelic. n i thought, "ok now i bet the rain is gonna stop as soon as this ends." and sure enough, the rain poured down for his entire set, then just abruptly halted as soon as it was over. didnt rain again for the rest of the night. like how did he do that. guys how did he. do that

✝️ at the beginning of his set i had to face a trial from this dude who weirdly targeted me. he kept trying to mosh, but it was clear that he like, was young n didnt understand crowd etiquette. like we were standing close to the sidelines, n it was obvious no one else but this one dude was trying to get thrashed about. and he also just weirdly kept coming for me, altho my friends were trying to block it. i was giving him benefit of the doubt at first but as it went on n was clear he was disturbing everyone around us...i knew i had to put a stop to it. so i had a Power moment. like i somehow developed blood devil strength n when he came towards me again i grabbed him by the neck of his shirt, w both hands, and THREW him into the ground FACE first jfbsshshah. it looked painful and i laughed at him menacingly. it was so feral of me but like. he had to learn. and he immediately just got up n fucked off. then everyone peacefully danced and had fun together after that! cus none of us wanted to mosh, we are drainers bro! i did feel kinda bad cus i am generally pro-moshing but there are unspoken rules yknow. no one had opened up a pit, we werent even close to the middle, there was lots of girlies around me in their tiny outfits n precarious platforms, it wasnt cool of him. moshing can b the most fun in the world when its done rite w/ ppl who get it. i will admit, it was a great release of all my pent up rage to commit a little violence. and commit it in such a way that it actually just benefitted everyone around me. all while im wearing a frilly petticoat and fake puppy ears and bladee is singing be nice to me. The Glory Is Mine :) also, after the show, my friends confirmed that he was weirdly targeting me and aiming for me specifically even when they'd try to block him. no clue why but that made it all the more satisfying that i was the one to shut him down.

♈️ a girl in the crowd who i dont know handed me a bottle of poppers and i was like yeah ok fuck it. took a whiff n just passed it onwards.

💟 he left immediately after the set ended so no one got to meet him but i dont mind. im so happy w the experience he gave us. i cant blame him for wanting to leave cus there was sooo many people at the festival it wouldve caused chaos if he'd tried to meet fans. also they didnt bring any merch which was kinda sad but o well!! im too broke to b spending my money on that rn anyways lol

☯️ he was wearing a walgreens hat and didnt take off his sunglasses the entire time. he was also wearing white gloves.

🛐 after the show we hung around, watched 100gecs but my feet were Kill so stayed at the back. it was rly good, they played hand crushed by a mallet and 800db cloud, my two fav songs by them.. hand crushed by a mallet lyrics rly had me in my feelings thinking about saint.

🕉 after that the festival ended n everyone was talking about this after party laura was playing at meow wolf but it cost like $40 to get in. n we were like...so tired...not paying for that...but... well, eleanor is rly tite w the people who started meow wolf, who were there at the festival. so she pulled some strings n got us in for free. like my body was dying but i knew i had to go on. and it was so fucki g worth it. omg. before lauras set our meow wolf friends took us thru all these exhibits that are usually packed with people but they were completely empty for us. it was UNREAL. i took so many pictures, mostly on my digital camera cus my phone was almost dead, gona upload them to my laptop in a bit so i can post some. it was so massive and beautiful and layed out so thoughtfully. felt like something id dream of as a child. we played and explored for half an hour or so until laura's set started. which i already talked about, it was legendary, she is so fucking funny and dope. truly inspiring confidence and stage presence. watching her drunkenly fight the sound guy was so beautiful. like she rly just wanted to play her songs and party all night :") i wouldve gone all nite if they'd let her. sometimes dylan would put on a song n it'd be like some rly complex n unique hyperpop song then laura would come back n put on kesha. it was truly madly deeply iconic, so so glad 2 be a part of it.

💟 all in all, it was so much more than i ever couldve expected. it felt better than a dream. all day i thought about saint so much and i saw them in everything. i think there's no better way i couldve honor my friend and everything their life stood for. i really feel like they were there with me, and they were divinely intervening in their own ways. im really happy. i feel a renewal of faith in my heart and reassured that i am still able to enjoy myself. life can still be beautiful...loss and gain... we just have to go on and transmute the pain into beauty however we can. i love u guys very much, if u read all of this, thats so cool and i love you. #<3.

#8/6/2022

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altontowersfireworks · 10 months

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REBELFORUMS v.1.0.2.3 THREAD TAG:53173EXPRNC TYPE:EXPERIENCEPOST

USERCODE: Guest_38589458

Oh shit, where do i begin with this.

I will come off clean and say i work for X-Sector, will not specify my rank or what part i work around in, with this post you might already guess but i have a specific experience that never fails to make me feel the chills.

For a bit of context, no matter where you work in X-Sector, here and there you will once in a while hear stories or rumors about top secret stuff, experiments, upcoming things or whatever, hell you might experience them yourself.

I was quite unlucky (or lucky, however you wanna see it as) to actually experience it and im hoping it was just another night inside the ministry.

It was around 11 PM, almost midnight. I get a request to send some classified folders to the ministry, specifically the west wing. (as far as i know, thats where most experiments and corrections take place, i could be wrong, idc)

I sighed and grab the folders, i went through x-sector towards one of the main doors of the ministry since that is one of the most common routes for me to deliver stuff to them. (Yknow, the one behind the oblivion pit)

and i SWEAR i hear someone or something moving at a quick pace and then some loud leaf rustling coming from one of the taller trees that cover a part of x-sector, it caught me quite bad and my gut was telling me to stroll a bit faster.

I had to calm down, i thought to myself "It is probably just some squirrel, chill out."

I enter the ministry and deliver the documents, with my heart still beating because of the strange thing i had just experienced minutes ago.

My gut told me to stay in the ministry for a while, something was definitely off.

Re-thinking what had happened outside, a squirrel couldn't have made such a loud leaf rustling noise, it had to something FAR more large.

I stayed around in the west wing for a while, i had done this before so they didn't really mind.

That is when all of the sudden, i SHIT YOU NOT, this loud and blood-curling screech echoes through a good part of the ministry, like if a darn velociraptor just somehow snuck into the ministry.

My blood froze instantly, before one of the doctors in one of the rooms yells at me to enter the room they were in.

Whatever made that noise definitely screamed danger and the whole ministry knew it, so i got in. The doctor introduced themselves before just abruptly turning off the lights and just told me to keep quiet or whisper if i really had to talk.

I was quite confused but i complied, my gut-feeling chimed in again feeling something was about to go down really bad.

In a matter of seconds, chaos was unleashed.

I could hear what i could only describe as an entire mess

People screaming, lights being smashed, steel-like clanks, alarms going off, objects being destroyed, glass shattering and yet more noises, similar or equal to the aforementioned blood-curling screech.

Whatever the fuck was attacking the ministry in that moment was making my fear rise, how ironic knowing it is all about happiness in this place.

My curiosity was itching in that moment and i wanted to slightly peek into the tiny window the door of the room i was in had, it couldn't go wrong, right?

The doctor whispered with a slight tone of confusion, asking me what i was doing but at this point i seriously wanted to know what was up even if it risked my life. (Yes, im quite stupid sometimes with decisions, don't judge me.)

Oh boy that sure was unfortunate timing, because the second i slightly peeked into that window, whatever was the thing causing destruction was getting close to the west wing, i had two options.

Keep peeking or stop peeking right now.

I mentioned before i was quite stupid with decisions sometimes, right? Welp, you might guess what i chose because the curiosity inside my brain kept itching.

I was ready for my mind to digest whatever the appearance of the creature, experiment, thing or destructive-whatever was approaching. My brain was already making an image of some sort of creature with joy serum veins or something.

To my surprise, it was quite far from grotesque or creepy.

What i saw instead looked like an advocate of the bunch, a reptile of sorts to be specific (if i really had to describe it, it looked like a salamander and a snake at the same time). Blue skin, one eye was revealed on its face, yellow iris with a spiral inside of it. It was dressed in a neat-like outfit, some sort of face-mask covered a good part of its head, it was shaped like a light yellow cartoony-like marmalised or dizzy cat.

Its mouth was covered with another mask of sorts, it had a teeth-like grin printed on it.

The rest of the outfit was nothing special, wore a jacket with the aforementioned light yellow color and some black, forming a stripe pattern. the shoes looked kinda blocky and cube-like in the end.

What caught my attention whatsoever was...this strange sickle or scythe-like blade coming out of the tip of its tail, it looked quite sharp.

Of course it seemed to have been recently used to stab and attack.

Its breathing was heavy, before it mumbled something under its breath, screeched once more and broke one of the lights from the entrance of the west wing, before running away.

I flinched and stopped peeking out the door-window in fear it could see me.

Something still felt...odd.

It was a good amount of minutes, i would say even an hour before the chaos ceased and so did the alarms.

The ministry intercom did its classic chime, a warning was given about something along the lines of 'fatalities' and 'damages'

Whatever that person or thing was, it did not leave empty-handed.

The doctor that was in the room turned on the lights, telling me i was free to go unless i wanted correction.

I declined and just scuttled away, looking at the aftermath of that entire mess that was currently being cleaned.

Objects scattered everywhere, posters ripped off or with scratches, a bunch of shattered yellow shades and goggles, broken giggle gas canisters and lab-coats on the ground, joy serum syringes somehow STUCK to the ceiling and walls hanging from their needles, scratches and damages to the walls, just a lot of structural damage more than damage to someone.

Im assuming what they cleaned first was, well, whoever was met with death.

I couldn't sleep that night, many questions were being made inside my head.

Was this normal? Was this the first time this happened? Who was that person? What were they doing? Did they have a reason? Were they really an advocate? Were they an experiment, correction gone wrong or rogue advocate?

Something suddenly connects this whole havoc together, the aforementioned loud rustling in one of the trees before i entered the ministry DEFINITELY had to do something with this and i came to one conclusion.

Whoever that was, they were definitely chasing me or finding a way to get into the ministry. One of the two, or both.

I might never know but it still keeps me awake whenever i remember it.

If any other rogue x-sector workers who use this forum had similar experiences in some way and had some tips or experiences that could match, it would be very much appreciated.

67 Dots - 25 Replies

#nyan's oc stuff #ask to tag #death mention cw #blood mention cw #needles mention cw

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savecomplete · 1 year

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re: post that says i play a part in "carrying the fandom"

not going to name names, not going to mention (tumblr function) anyone, but i want to nip this notion in the bud.

prefacing this with the disclaimer that this is strongly worded, that this is going to sound mean and harsh, but i'm fine with coming off that way, if i get to assert my boundaries.

i'm incredibly averse to "fandom". i want nothing to do with fandom involvement. i am not here to make friends. all i need to enjoy media is to talk about it with the handful of friends i've shared it to, and i either already have that, or i make it happen. when it comes to needing to use art to appreciate a given work, i express this creative energy in many different ways. visual art is one outlet for that self-expression. all i'm doing on cohost/tumblr/twitter/etc. is using relevant tags for art i make, deciding what i can/want to share to the public. tumblr's archiving and tagging system, while still lacking in features over the past decade, is notorious for how useful it is to visual artists.

do not put me on a pedestal, and do not treat my work like its public domain use. you'd be wrong to do either. i'm not superior or inferior to you; don't act like it. there is a reason my art accounts all use a selfie of me as my avatar. we do not know each other and i'm perfectly fine with that. stay on your side of the screen.

given 8/9 posts i've made on this account so far are katana zero posts, and that i was mentioned as one of a few artists "carrying the fandom" on here by a fandom member, i also want to speak my mind about how i perceive this specific fandom. it's weird. a lot frustrates me about it. i've seen a lot of things that make my stomach turn. some heavy issues are treated in flippant manner, despite the source game portraying them with appropriate gravity. for whatever reason, it's typical for the fandom to lighten fifteen's skin, despite it being exactly the same as zero's skintone. there is a bizarrely prevalent attitude that the incoming DLC is an owed debt to the fandom, enough for people to make accounts like one dedicated to a daily count of how long it's been since full release without the DLC. come on, people. it's as if the DLC exists in some strange intangible vacuum where the budget, size, and humanity of the dev team are somehow not a factor. as though the DLC exists separate from the ongoing pandemic, and a literal real war affecting the team.

to see so many "fans" act incredibly entitled, so loudly and constantly, and doing this everywhere and anywhere it's fucking possible to leave a comment or post, even on unrelated work, well…

yeah, hopefully by now it's clear why i would want to distance myself from any fandom involvement. i hate fandom. it's never a healthy culture; katana zero's fandom is no special outlier to that. i'm not a superhero savior to this fandom that is supposedly "dying", "near-dead", etc. im not "carrying" shit, i'm just using your tags. "this fandom is nearly dead" then die! i'm not a part of this! go read interviews from the dev team and learn about game development—hell, go and try to draw or animate or compose or code something for a game, and then just try to get back to me about how "unreasonable" the wait is for the DLC. pretending this exists in a vacuum: if the "first act" of the story took 6 years of development, and the DLC is currently taking 3 years so far, and the DLC's size is of half the main game... is the rate of game development truly anything close to unreasonable?

...i'll say that, to me, there's a difference between fans of a work of media and the "fandom" for it, even if the former group is not entirely separate from the latter. from half a month of being on tumblr i've grown over 50 followers, which is incredible, especially for a single-digit amount of art shared so far. i read tags. i check my mentions. there's been some lovely compliments through tags on reblogs, which i appreciate, and i further appreciate that my work is being enjoyed and shared through reblogs and likes. thank you.

p much the bulk of you treat me kindly; honestly, i'm still trying to wrap my head around all the positive attention and encouragement. thank you for taking care and effort to tell me what you have. energy and time have finite limits; i'm happy when people decide to spend that on making me feel appreciated.

but i'm also a rather direct person, and don't like being wishy-washy about my limits and boundaries.

so, to conclude: i get uncomfortable when people try to nominate me as notable for any involvement in "fandom", and further, when strangers talk as though i'm trying to breathe life into any fandom perceived as "dead" or "dying". that's not my problem. i'm not trying to solve it, either. i'm not looking for recognition as a popular figure in a fandom. what i create and why i create it is independent of any fandom existing. i don't want anything to do with fandom involvement. leave me out of it.

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