UPDATE FROM NICKY!

He's going to grad school to get his MBA!

Can you please do boyfriend HCs for the jjk men that you write for? Thank you!

⌗︙・boyfriend hcs !! ⸜⸜・ ft. gojo, geto, and nanami

a/n: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS THANK YOU SO MUCH NONNIE. you all will witness my mental illness today !!!!!!!!!!

content: pure fluff. just me brainrotting, slightly modern au ?, nudity mentions in gojo's (shocker), gn!reader (there’s use of princess in satoru’s), pet names, just cuteness all around with a small sex joke here and there !!! nanami’s is VERY self-indulgent, sorry </3

⌗︙・SATORU GOJO ⸜⸜・

satoru didnt even ask you to be his boyfriend, honestly. the two of you just started holding hands, calling e/o cute names, hanging out at some point.

when suguru asked him about your guys' relationship status gojo's first thought was "well, we've been going out on lots of dates, so i guess i'm their boyfriend!"

he constantly texts you asking "how was class? did you get home safe? today's mission was tough, get some rest. i love you." even if he's right next to you he'll still message you and talk to you.

he's a tease. everyone knows this. sometimes he'll bring up how the first time you went over to his house, you walked in on his naked and just stared at him for a few seconds.

"hey do you want chinese or mexican fo-" your eyes widen at the sight of satoru's bare chest. he turns around at the sound of your voice and his eyes slightly widen. suddenly the white towel wrapped around his hips falls to the ground. your eyes bulge out of your head, staring at the name in front of you.

"you like the view?" he winked putting his hand on his hip as his towel was laying by his ankles. his voice brought you out of your trance.

"OH MY GOD, IM SO SORRY!" you quickly turned on your heal and slammed his door shut. he could hear your groaning in embarrassment from outside the door. satoru doesn't really mind honestly, he thinks it's funny, but he'll never stop teasing you about it.

he really really really likes you. he's the type of guy who will always bring you up in a conversation. geto and shoko are annoyed by it, but they're both glad he's found someone who makes him this happy.

common pet names with him are: princess, doll, baby, honey, and sugar bear (he says this to piss you off)

his favorite thing to do is just be in your presence. he likes to watch you study, cook, draw, talk with others, everything. anything he can do with you or see you do is his favorite activity.

he likes showing off his strength, so sometimes he'll pick you up and just hold you.

you were cutting the veggies for tonight's stir fry as you heard the front door open. "satoru? baby, is that you?" you turn your head around and are welcomed by his pretty face.

"hi princess. how was your day?" he drops his stuff off by the door, shedding his coat and strides over to you. because of his height, he only takes a few steps before getting to you. you set the knife down on the board.

"it was okay, pretty boring. nanami dropped by to give you your- woah!" his arms wrap around you waist and he picks you up. instinctively, you wrap your legs around his waist, and hold onto his shoulders.

"what's all this for?" you ask, nuzzling into his neck.

"mm nothing, just missed you, pretty thing,"

⌗︙・SUGURU GETO ⸜⸜・

im sorry he's such a loser. i think geto's more of a loser bf, than gojo honestly.

he's a big softie when it comes to you.

he's the type to ask "would you love me if i was a worm?"

you guys were close friends for the longest time. he would see you and shoko together talking, and satoru would casually walk up to you and say hello, with geto following in suit.

he's quite the eye candy and had lots of girls after him for a while, but he's only had eyes for you.

with encouragement (blackmail) from satoru, geto was forced to use a pickup line on you. he stole gojo's apple and walked over to you in the cafeteria line.

you see geto walking up towards you, so you raise your hand up to wave at him. a soft smile appears on your face and geto's heart melts. he's down bad for you. he feels his heart racing and his palms grow sweaty. before you can say hello, geto places the apple in your palm and says with a small voice,

"you're the apple of my eye," and he runs off. shoko and satoru are laughing hysterically as they watch their friend dash off, his cheeks and ears stained pink.

you're left standing there in confusion.

i think the way yall start dating is one day is pouring after school. kids are running onto the buses, jumping in their parents' cars, opening umbrellas, but you realize you dont have an umbrella.

"shit," you mutter. you scrounge through your bag, hoping, praying that an umbrella will spawn in your bag, but alas, the world does not work like that.

"everything okay?" geto asked, peaking over your shoulder. you turn around to see him holding an umbrella in his hands. the two of you are next door neighbors, it wouldn't hurt to ask, right?

"no, i didn't bring an umbrella. can we walk home together?" you ask him sweetly. he can't refuse you and your pretty eyes. geto thinks he's never seen someone so cute. he gives you a smile, one only reserved for you, and holds his arm out. you wrap your arms and his and smile brightly,

"thank you so much! i love you!" he giggle, pushing yourself against his bigger build. geto looks down at you and chuckles.

"i love you too," he leans down and places a kiss on your forehead. "so much," he mutters. he opens his umbrella and starts walking. your heart is racing. did he just kiss you...and say he loves you?! he looks back behind him, giving you a soft smile. you look into his eyes and you felt like your heart was glowing. suguru geto is the owner of your heart, he you are the owner to his. 

hes a movie connoisseur and a home body, so lots of your dates include watching flims, tv shows, plays, etc 

a little personal headcanon of mine, but i think suguru loves flowers. he absolutely adores them, so please give him flowers, or put them in his hair. he’ll give you the cutest smile ever. 

common pet names with him would be: my love, star, darling, and baby

i also hc that hes a great cook ??? he’ll cook you anything. he’s not the best baker though, but he tries! and that’s all that matters

at the end of the day, suguru loves you more than anyone and he would go to hell and back if that meant he could see you smile. 

⌗︙・KENTO NANAMI ⸜⸜・

oh nanami...sweet sweet nanami

he’s the sweetest boyfriend ever. constantly has his arm around you, compliments you, drives you to work, packs your lunch, you name it, he does it

he’s the kindest man out there and he does anything you ask of him. all he wants in return is your love and loyalty. 

he gives you the ultimate princess treatment. you want lemon in your water, you got it. you don’t wanna drive to the store? he can do it. you don’t wanna push the cart? nanami will push it. you’re too lazy to do you assignments? nanami will help, but he’ll explain it to you as well. 

he’s so whipped for you too like. one time satoru caught him smiling at his phone and he was shocked.

“nanami!!! how are yo-” satoru abruptly stops in his tracks. he sees the soft smile painted on nanami’s face. he’s never seen this expression on nanami’s face before. sure nanami’s smiled in front of satoru before, but never like this. satoru feels his heart warm. he’s glad nanami has someone who makes him happy. will he use this to his advantage though? yes. oh yes he will.

“nanami!” satoru exclaims and wraps his arms around the blonde. he leans forward slightly, making eye contact with nanami. “sooo...who’s the lucky one?” satoru wiggles his eyebrows, smiling at nanami. nanami scoffs and tucks his phone back into his pocket. 

“my partner...” nanami mutters. satoru’s eyes widen. he didn’t expect nanami to actually answer him. satoru’s smile grows even ore warmer. the fact nanami is outwardly expressing his love for you, even going as far to allow satoru to know, you must be really important to him. 

“well im sure whoever it is, they’re lucky,” satoru pats nanami’s back and keeps walking. what he doesn’t hear tho is nanami saying,

“no it’s me, im the lucky one.” with his hand toying with the keychain in his pocket. it’s a tag with your name and anniversary date on it. nanami’s kept it on him since college and he intends to never take it off. 

he does tremendous research on any interest you have so he can understand what you’re talking about. you’re one of the people he wants to engage in conversation with, so he’ll do anything to make sure you always feel heard.

he’s a gossip bf. he’ll always want to know the drama going on in your life and if he overhears any too, you’ll be the first to know, no doubt. 

when he comes home after missions, he takes off his tie, jacket and harness and just lays on your thighs. sometimes he’ll ask if you can massage his shoulders or legs. 

much like geto, nanami is a great cook. he’s well versed in breakfast as that’s usually the only meal he makes himself. often times he’s too tired to eat dinner, or he’s grabbed some takeaway. however, the moment you entered his life, he’s learning every cultural dish of yours, your favorite sweets, snacks, drinks, etc. 

i think he’s a sucker for sweets, so he’s better at baking than cooking, but he’s still a star chef.

common pet names with him would be: love, honey, sweetheart, my [name], pretty

dates with nanami also tend to be pretty domestic. grocery and home decor seem to be your guys’ favorites.

“nanami, do we have any more detergent at home?” you ask him, browsing through all the different kinds of soaps. 

“i think so, but we should stock up.” he replies, grabbing the bulky white bottle. you stop him abruptly by grabbing his wrist. his eyes dart from the bottle to your face, trying to see if anything is wrong. when he cannot figure it out, he raises his eyebrow.

“i don’t like that one. i want the pink one,” you point to the bright pink bottle behind you. nanami sighs, smiling internally and places the white bottle back. you hand him the pink detergent, smiling. 

“oh yeah, can we get more snacks? i want more chips!” 

“we have six bags at home.”

“so? i want more. ill kiss you if you buy me it.” you wink at him as a pink hues seem to conquer his cheeks. he clears his throat,

“fine. but only two more.”

“that’s two kisses for you then,” you cup his cheek in your hand, kissing him once on the nose, then peck him on the lips. nanami’s left awkwardly looking at the laundry supplies as you skip over to the food ailes looking for more chips to bring home.

nanami believes that nothing could even be considered okay without you. his whole life took a turn when he met you. he started to take care of himself more, he cared about coming home at reasonable times, he had a reason now. and that reason was you.

no matter what happens in the future to the both of you, nanami knows for sure, he’ll never regret you being his first love. 

can you tell who’s my favorite jjk man..............?

Privilege pt.2

A/N : there is the part two.

TW: ANGST. cursing. toxic relationship.

''what is this smoke? Rafe!'' you just arrived to Cameron's. knocking his door but it was locked. ''Rafe, you okay?''

''shit. shit SHIT! i am. i am okay baby. just give me a minute.'' sounded like he was caught on doing something. you know he would never cheat on you. but what was he hiding?

two or three minutes later he unlocked the door.''you okay?'' you looked at him and looked to the room.

''why wouldnt i?''

''i dont know. why would you?'' you were holding a glass you took from the kitchen.

''i… i didnt want my dad to see me.'' yeah. acceptable.

''you could open the door to me. you knew it was me.''

''i panicked. okay? dont blame me. im not cheating you or something.''

''i never said you cheat on me. what the hell is this coming from?'' you got so angry.

''because you fucking act like it! i would never.'' he sighed and hugged you. ''i missed you. im glad youre here.''

''im glad youre finally at home too. so what are your plans?'' you asked like he didnt have plans. your plans for today was Golf and then Top and Sarahs gonna join you for drinks. if he hasnt forgotten.

''i-i dont have any. now youre here we can just, i dont know, why dont we just lay?'' he asked. of course he has forgotton.

''no Rafe. we cant lay.'' you looked up him. ''we had fucking plans fo today. we were gonna Golf! we should be there two hours ago! but of course you forgot.''

''i dont remember anything about Golf. you didnt even tell me!'' he yelled.

''dont yell at me. i am telling you this for two days! but as usual you are coked out here.'' you yelled back.

''youre saying this like im a fucking addict. im not! you dont know shit!''

''you are a fucking addict! i know all of your shits. youre a junkie!''

''hate you when you act like it. i need to relax okay? you make me fucking hate you!'' he shouted so loudly whole house heard it.

''hate me? youre the one making things fucking difficult. you dont even hear what youre saying.''

''it is always me, right? the problem is always me.''

''you know what, im going. you can call me when you sober up. i cant deal with you right now.''

''you always leave. yeah. thats the one thing you do right.'' you ignored him and went upstairs. Sarah and Wheezie smiled to you. you tried to smile them back but you couldnt.

''sorry.'' Sarah said. ''you dont deserve this. i wish--'' she got interrupted by her brother.

''Y/N, come here.'' his voice sounded calm and but weird. ''dont leave me. please. im sorry''

''no, Rafe. let me go.'' he held by your wrist.

''no. w-we can sort this out, okay? dont you trust me? c'mon. dont leave me. im sorry. im so fucking sorry. please.'' he was helpless.

''not now. please let me go.'' you were trying to let yourself go.

''Rafe get off of her!'' Sarah yelled.

''Sarah shut up. im not talking to you.''

''its your sister! dont ever talk to her like that.'' he was still helding you. ''Rafe if you dont let me go you will lose me forever. i mean it.'' you were stubborn and he knows that.

''we gonna fix this, right? promise me. promise you dont leave me!'' his hands on your wrist lowered to your hands. his held wasnt strict as it was.

''yes. we gonna fix this. but not now. do you trust me?'' you felt the tears in your eyes. same tears were in his eyes. he shook his head. ''okay. i trust you, too. we gonna fix this. i will call you, okay? i love you.''

''you gonna call me?'' he wasnt sure. he knew himself. you shouldnt call him. he dont deserve you. and you dont deserve it. you deserve the world but this and him.

''yeah, yeah. i promise im gonna call you. but not today. we need some space. im not leaving you.''

''you still love me?''

''i still love you. but i should go, okay?'' he dropped your hands off.

''can i… can i kiss you?'' he held you by your cheeks. you shook your head. and he kissed you softly. ''i love you. so much. you cant even know how i love you.''

''i know.'' just because of this love he cant let you out but he cant let you in either. ''i love you too.'' you kissed him one more time and headed to your home.

DUDE. okay you’re so real for that. i’ve been listening to djo for like….. months now and i have a playlist of the decide album with some songs from twenty twenty on it. let me just say, this playlist has actually saved my life recently. it’s the best playlist ever for overstimulation or when i just need to calm the fuck down. don’t get me started on how insane some of the lyricism of some songs make me. i could ramble about djo almost as much as hozier i think. music is so goddamn incredible. i’m so joyed fo hear you like djo <3 do you have a fav song so far??

and thank you, that means a lot, love. i’m trying my best. i don’t really know what’s causing everything to feel so bad so suddenly. i hope it all passes soon. thank you for being sweet 🫶 how have you been recently? hopefully well?

-🦇

BRO! okay so i went through and tried to pic my faves and just ended up making a list of like... all of the fucking songs hahahahahha! I have a playlist of both albums and the few singles. And it's literally so calming to listen too. Like... his voice is so soothing. But then he has the funky beats as well. And i just... music is so special to me. Like, to the point where i get possessive. And not like... in a weird way about the artist or anything. Just like... i don't wanna share it with people. I want to like.. keep it to myself so i can just FEEL it and love it. And idk. Im not good at articulating my relationship with music because it's very deep and like intwined with every little part of my soul and i dont know how to untangle it all to like... study the connections. But i love music. And i definitely waited til the perfect time to listen to him. Im very much into the belief that there are certain times your, or at least me, that im like "supposed" to listen to certain music. And listening to that feeling hasn't ever steered me wrong. (I've only listened to a handful of Hozier for that reason actually. It's not time yet. But it will be one day.) Idk. I have very deep feelings about music i guess. Idk. I love a lot of the songs. Most of them. All for different reasons. And I'm really glad i finally listened to it.

And oh no! Im sorry for the random disembodied stressfulness!!! I hope it ebbs soon and fucks off and you can relax! I've not been too bad! Just chillin and workin. And i made some chicken teriyaki that was pretty bomb so that was yummy! Haha! 💛💙💛

loved ur thoughts on it and i'm yet again glad to know that 2 out of 3 of our fav songs match again and i'm so glad it's a 20/10 album for u as well

tbh i only remember matthew talking so i'm not going to be a help here sadly💀💀

ERIC NEEDS TO HAVE LONGER PARTS I LOVE MY MAN SUNWOO LOVE HIS RAPS LOVE HIS VOICE BUT ERIC DESERVES TO SHINE AS WELL HE ALWAYS GET SO LITTLE PARTS💔 and i'm glad we did talk more about sunwoo😇 atleast it was worth it cuz of actor jihoon ig but the fact that only the last episodes were good😭😭 AND YAYYY IM HAPOY TO HEAR THAT🥳🥳

TBH IT WOULD BE CRAZY IF WE WOULD ACTUALLY END UP MEETING UP but if u need any help while u guys are here i am available to help anytime🫡

THE CLUB ONES WERE SO FUNNY I REMEMBER HOW THE TAEHYUN ONE AND THEIRS WERE AROUND THE SAME TIME AND I JUST LAUGHED SO HARD AT THEM (i remember seeing someone say "can't believe they are dancers and they move like this" i lost my shit actually) AND SO TRUE GOOD FOR HIM LMAO and now that u say that i follow an intak stan on tiktok AND SHE HASNT TALKED MUCH ABOUT JIM LIKE SHE USED TO (she also doesn't really make tiktoks that much and took like half off but we don't talk about that)

I DID WATCH IT!!! BAR!!!! I CANNNNOTT PUT MY FEELINGS INTO WORDS I LITERALLY ENDED UP ON THE FLOOR AFTER I WATCHED IT FOR THE FIEST TIME I JUST COULDNT TAKE MY EYES OF OFF JIHOON IT WAS SO BAD HIS FIT AND EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM WAS😭🤭 THE SONG🤌🤌🤌 THE CHOREOGRAPHY 🤌🤌 (but i did. feel a bit weird when i looked at junghwan doing al that .-.) and ever since it came out it has been my motivation to learn i'm just like okay i'm gonna finish this part and watch it again🤭 i am just so not ready for them to perform this like ever shsndbfn (liebestraum anon🥸)

SEE our taste in music actually matches for the most part 😭

still thinking of eric in kiss me if you can....and eric in general..... (i watched their vid w the fo squad today and girl let me tell u i think i fell in love with him ☹ you know me so well goodbye) also i wont talk abt sunwoo anymore bc he is yours only and i wont be a bad friend in this situation /j (i finished the bbam bbam social club series. literally 8h of staring at tipsy sunwoo. what did u expect to happen). ERIC DOESNT GET MANY PARTS ???? HAVE U HEARD THE MAN??????????????? JUSTICE FOR MY MAN.

omg im...so down actually ??? even tho i am SO awkward irl istg i think id die of anxiety but it would be so fun i think 😭😭 i still dont have the tickets so. we'll see hhhhh

NO BECAUSE TAEHYUNS CLUB WAS TOO DRY ISTG THAY WAS THE WORST ONE 😭😭 my man has to come to slovak clubs fr i'll show him how its done 🙄🙄 but also THEY HAVE SO MANY HONGDAE CLUBS AND HE WENT TO THE DRIEST ONE ??? 😭😭 but w the dancing part like how do u expect him to dance at a club he isnt gonna bust out the good boy gone bad choreo 😭😭😭 i mean at least shake ass a little i understand but dont expect big things 😭😭 also SEE im the most active intak stan confirmed (dont look that up) i need him to be my golden retriever boyfriend he's so pookie

on the topic of T5 move. *deep breath* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. jihoon's fit...lives in my mind rent free. like we knew he had abs and we did see them before but why did the sight affect me so much this time 😭 also i didnt even look at junghwan that much 😳 maybe for the best to not feel weird AHAHA i mean he is an adult but the 2 year age difference is providing a mental block for me to not see him in that way LMAO. we are NOT ready for the mv OR the live performance im afraid. plan my funeral friends ☹☹

if i could i would fight the school system just so u would have the time and mood to write >:T but i'm glad u could write a bit and waiting for ur next fic!!!🥳🥳 (your post about a fic u are writing seems pretty fun :o and love jihoon as a side character!!!) AAA IM HAPPY TO HEAR THAT I WOULD LOVE TO READ TREASURE FICS FROM U ESPECIALLY THE JIHOON ONES HIHI!!! I AM VERY GRATEFUL FOR UR FRIEND WHO CONVINCED U!!!!

hmmmm idk if its reveal vibe or not but my fav ep from them is the thrill ride ep (probably has a special place in my heart cuz that was my first cb with them lmao but that era was so well done and i really love the songs!!) i think their new ep is really great my favs are especially awake and savior aaanndd their breaking dawn album slaps as a whole i love it so muchhh and for my last recommendation from them would be survive the night which is a song that was fully written by sunwoo and it's definitely one of my favs (there is also a song from giuk featuring sunwoo that just dropped and u might like it if u are interested) and i really hope u will like some cuz idk if any of these would be the type of songs u would listen to;-; the last longer content i watched from them was come on the boyz but eric isn't in it cuz he was on a hiatus at the time:( but it's really fun! i also started to watch back the boyz timeout (and had to stop cuz school >:T) and that is also really good and everyone is there:D so i would recommend those if u want like a series (?) type of thing with them but for "shorter" contents their mafia games are very fun to watch!!! their idol human theater videos are great as well!!! and the last one i would say is they just made a video with the fo squad and that seemed very funny although i didn't have the time to watch it yet;-; (IM VERY SORRY ABOUT JUST RECOMMENDING SO MANY THINGS AND FOR THIS LONG ASS LIST I WENT A BIT OVERBOARD D: )

KEVIN IS SUCH A LOVELY GUY his bubble messages are usually either very funny or just very meaningful and his posts are always top tier🤌 i think he would just solidify his place in ur heart lmao and eric is just such a bestie material!!! well u know i just came in here in the middle of ur treasure era being like 🧍the boyz🧍and i don't want to interrupt u with just randomly talking about them 🧍(which i deff did so im sorry and sorry again for the long ass list of recs)

ooo god gifted kid burnouts suck so much;-; but tbh yeah the grade doesn't really matter just pass and get the paper in the end cuz that's the most important ig and u would get it with even just passing (although im just🤡 cuz i will never think like this sadly so) i don't think my experience will be different ngl;-; so im trying to get myself ready to just not be sad about it cuz it's bound to happen lmao

AHH UR REPLIES JUST MAKE ME SO HAPPY LIKE U READ MY LONG ASS RAMBLINGS AND U ARE ALWAYS SO LOVELY SO I JUST🥹🥹 I APPRECIATE U VERY MUCH!!!!!! (liebestraum anon💗💕💕 sorry for disappearing again☹️)

SJSJSJ its okay because the motivation is that once its over i have the whole summer to write is making me go through this more easily 😙😌 also im handling things a lot better than last semester LMAO so im good over here 🤞 DJSJ glad u liked the posts abt the fic so far, jihoon is kind of the main character unfortunatelt (he is in the fic more than mark i-) but the brainrot cant be helped. IM GRATEFUL FOR MY FRIEND TOO she's a real one 😙 i'll let u know abt the blog if i manage to set one up after all hihi

first comebacks with a group are always the most special istg i thought about this the other day. like for me rock with you, hot sauce and can't you see me? are really special too😭 i havent had time to listen to these but i promise that by the time we talk again i will and i'll have my reviews ready!! 😌😌 also i love how u can kinda get my music taste w western artists (like when u recommended me hungarian songs and were spot on) but w kpop u rlly cant tell😭😭😭 i love me some kpop group variety shows tbh so i will definitely watch all of these later !! DONT BE SORRY ABT RECOMMENDING SO MUCH I GET U IF I WAS ASKED FOR RECS FOR ANY OF MY FAV GROUPS I WOULDVE DONE THE SAME THING. i saw kevin's weverse (?) replies on tiktok today and i- 😭 my man is a comedian i love him. the same w eric. icons. SJSJS dont worry about interrupting my treasure era i can handle it (im also suddenly into cix as well so i can handle everyone atp)

and u get it u get it !!! like it does feel good to get academic validation from time to time (i got a 45/50 on my essay today❤❤❤) but as long as its not an F i do not feel disappointed. esp when i get reminded of the fact that im studying on one of the best unis in my country and that my major is actually kind of hard 💀💀 get ready for the terrors of university i mean u can expect it but actually experiencing it will be just as shitty so i just pray u dont take it as badly as i did for a lil while🤞 im here for u if that happens tho!!

always appreciating u and smiling at your asks, mwah mwah ‼

hold onto me (im a little unsteady) - sokka x reader

i was listening to the song when i came up w this so feel free to listen to that if you want

summary: a late night with sokka reminds you that even on the worst days, you always have someone in your corner.

a/n: lmao this is 100% self indulgent i have no excuses. my parents are getting divorced and almost every time they're together they argue and so this is just a comfort fic after it happened again tonight bc GD i wish i had a sokka. this one goes out to all my divorce babies or people with parents that never stop arguing. you are very loved<3

wc: 1.7k, this got away from me lol

warning(s): mentions of parents arguing n shit, like the tiniest mentions of implying sex and problems with consent (in general, not with them), but this is all fluff

hey. i know you’re probably asleep right now but could you come over?

It was far too late at night when you sent the text. A question asked on a whim, an offer that would most likely go ignored due to the boy on the other end being asleep.

But goddammit, you really didn’t care. Even if he didn’t respond, just hitting ‘send’ made you feel slightly better. You had already taken refuge in one of the sweatshirts he had left at your house (read: one that you had stolen and refused to give back) and as your eyes fell on the glow of the digital clock on your bedside table, you were once again reminded of how stupid this was.

But you heard the telltale buzz of a notification and all but lunged for your phone, an uncontrollable smile tugging on your lips. You didn’t know why you ever doubted him.

sokka💙: you know i never sleep babe

sokka💙: a curse of my genius

sokka💙: im omw

you’re the best thank you love<3

A pair of fuzzy socks and a refilled water bottle later, you heard the sound of something hitting your window. Though you tensed up at first, a roll of your eyes was all it took before you remembered just who you had invited over. Another smile took over as you pushed yourself off of your bed, pushing the curtains aside in time to see another pebble hit the pane.

A physical effort took place to stifle the laugh as you pushed your window up, and you leaned against the sill on your elbows to get a better look at your ridiculous boyfriend.

“Throwing rocks at my window? I think I’m stuck in a bad romcom.”

He grinned and let the remaining pebbles fall to the ground. “It’s what’s to be expected from your Prince Charming, right? Besides, I’m assuming that your parents wouldn’t just let me walk through the front door at this hour.”

You felt the heat rise to your cheeks. Just the sight of Sokka was always enough to make you feel better, and tonight was no exception. The vice on your heart was already starting to loosen. “Right as usual. Think you’ll catch me if I jump?”

He laughed and made a show of looking up and down the distance and then at his arms. “I’d like to say so, but I think we’d have better luck if I climb up.”

“You sure you can do that, big guy?” you asked with a teasing grin. He rolled his eyes with the same sentiment.

“Of course I can. I just thank nature that there’s a tree so close to your window. It’s saved me from a lot of embarrassing falls.”

You chuckled and backed away from the window, the slight chill from the night air beginning to get to you. “I’ll leave you to it while I get things ready.”

Truth be told, your room was a total mess at the moment. You knew Sokka wouldn’t care, especially not now, but it put you slightly more at ease to have something in your life that you could control. You were in the middle of shoving some previously strewn-about clothes into your closet when you heard the click of your window closing. When you turned around, you were met with your boyfriend’s smiling face.

“You’re so pretty,” you murmured as you walked over to him. He wrapped his arms around your waist as you kissed him lightly on the lips, unable to stop the blossoming smile nor the warmth that the action gave you. “Thank you for being here.”

“Of course.” The softness of his words were in stark contrast to the joking bravado from only minutes earlier, and as you stepped away from his embrace and pushed yourself onto your bed, he joined you on the other side. “And not that I’m not happy to be here, but I just wanna know. What’s going on?”

You sighed, letting one leg hang off the bed as you tucked the other in. It was a testament to Sokka’s power how quickly he had gotten you to forget about the new mess of the night. “The usual showing of fuckall and fuckup. I’m more impressed by how they never run out of things to scream at each other about.”

Your bad joke didn’t get a laugh out of him, which you were secretly glad for. Instead, he snaked an arm around your back and tugged you closer, a contented sigh falling from your lips as you nestled your head into the space between his shoulder and his head. “I’m sorry,” he murmured. “You know it’s not your fault, right?”

The phrase had gone in one ear and out the other more times than you could count from your parents, but each time Sokka said it, the words held a different weight. You knew it wasn’t your fault in the first place, but guilt didn’t care all that much for logic. You knew he meant it though, and once more the vice loosened.

“I know. But it still helps to hear it.” You glanced up at him, reaching a hand up to twist a loose strand of his hair around your finger. “You should wear your hair down more often,” you mused. “It makes you look like a prince.”

He chuckled, amusement glinting through his ocean eyes. “I did say I was your Prince Charming, didn’t I?”

You smiled, slowly uncurling his hair from your finger. “Yeah.”

“That means I’ll always be there for you. Especially to save my royal from their evil stepparents.”

Another laugh bubbled in your chest at that, and you leaned closer into him. “Thank you. The more I visit your place, the more I want your family to be mine. Hakoda is like, the nicest man I’ve ever met, and your mom? She actually makes me want to cry with how sweet she is. I think I know where you get it from.”

He grinned and bumped your leg with his own. “You know you’re welcome over there any time. But maybe you shouldn’t — I think my mom might actually adopt you with how much she loves you. That… that would be really weird.”

His joy was infectious as you planted another kiss on his cheek, something that earned you a, as you liked to call it, dazzling Signature Sokka Smile. “I’ll make sure she holds off on the adoption papers for now.”

“I’d like that.”

And though the happiness you felt at the moment was almost overwhelming, that was just what caused that tiny sliver of doubt to come in. When people invited their partners over at three in the morning, it usually wasn’t to sit on the bed and talk about their problems. It was… it was for more, and you didn’t want that right now. And because you were an expert at it, you decided to put your foot in your mouth and start talking.

“I— I’m sorry that I called you over here so late, for no reason. I know you probably expected something else than me ranting, but…” you sighed, drawing your knees closer to your chest as you brought your other hand to Sokka’s resting on your shoulder. “I’m sorry if I gave you the wrong idea.”

He sighed at that, but you knew it wasn’t one of disappointment. “You know I’m here for you. I don’t care if you just want to sit in silence for the next five hours while we stare at the wall, or if you want to watch sappy rom coms until your eyes bleed. I’m more than okay with staying like this. I didn’t come over here because I expected anything from you — I came over here because you needed me, and so I’m here.” Sokka smiled, an image you didn’t think would ever stop making you melt, and intertwined your hand with his. “This is perfect. You’re perfect.”

You were so stunned at the brazen declaration that your voice got stuck in your throat for a moment, holding back tears. (Happy tears. They were never anything other than happy tears with Sokka.) It hit you then that you didn’t really know what it was like having someone get close to you without an ulterior motive.

“Thank you,” you murmured after a moment of comfortable silence. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” You knew he was smiling, even without having to look up at him. You could hear it in his voice, feel it in the kiss he pressed to your hairline.

A comfortable silence hung in the air for a long time until you broke it. “You know… my dad kinda ran off to a motel for the night after this whole thing, and my mom leaves early in the morning. If you were serious about those rom coms…” You allowed the unsaid question of staying the night to fester so Sokka knew he could say no if he wanted to, but he didn’t even hesitate.

“Of course I was serious. I mean, I’ve gotta get the ideas for our future wedding from somewhere.”

You laughed, a sentiment that had occurred more times in the ten minutes he had been here than the past week, and picked the remote for your little box TV off of your bedside table. You clicked through various movies until you found one Sokka liked, and then you cuddled deeper into his side to prepare for the ride you had ahead of you.

Thirty minutes into 27 Dresses, he had fallen asleep, arm still around you and one of his legs slightly intertwined with one of your own. But it’s not like you minded — the familiar weight of Sokka in your bed had caused all your worries to melt away, if only for the night.

You didn’t expect him to last past the first movie, but you were sure you would at least get through until Katherine Heigl got the man. But there was an overwhelming feeling of safety permeating the air with Sokka’s arms around you, and you ended up knocked out before she could even get through all twenty seven dresses.

It wasn’t lost on you how fortunate you were — he didn’t expect anything like that from you, he just wanted you to be safe. He was there for you. You would never understand how you had gotten so lucky with your boyfriend, but you would never stop being grateful for him.

-

this is the most self indulgent thing ive ever written and i am NOT sorry

perm tags: @dv0412 @siriuslyslyslytherin @maruchan77

atla tags: @marianne1806 @brown-eyed-thang @akiris

Never Have I Ever - Harry Styles

this is very random and just a lil somethin’, bc i secretly dream about being on one of these shows and meeting one of my crushes lmao, not me pretending to be at an interview in my own kitchen, hah, not at all!

hi hello so im adding this after this was posted. i randomly turned this into a series so you can find further parts for this in the series masterpost!

word count: 1.8k

pairing: Harry x actress!reader

SERIES MASTERPOST

masterlist

“It’s so good to have you here, it’s been quite some time since the last time you sat in this chair, am I right?” Ellen asked with a warm smile as you nodded.

“Yeah, I’ve been busy, I guess,” you chuckle tugging your hair behind your ear.

“I mean, of course. You starred in two movies since then and even got nominated for an Emmy as well for your role in The Umbrella Academy!” she lists and the audience starts cheering on your successes. “Of course you’ve been busy, but I’m glad you had time to drop by for a talk. So, let’s talk about your upcoming movie. You’ll be co-stars with Zendaya and Finn Wolfhard, it’s a quite interesting cast.”

“Yes! I’m very excited to work with them, I just met Zendaya the other day and though I’M yet to meet Finn I’m sure we will get along well.”

“What was your first impression about Zendaya?”

“Oh, she is very sweet and funny, I think working with her will be more like just a fun activity,” you admit chuckling and Ellen nods in agreement.

“I bet. Alright. So let’s talk about quarantine, it was a rather huge part of the year, where did you spend it?”

“I went home to my family, so I quarantined with them in my hometown.”

“And what did you do mostly?”

“We played a lot of board games and my mom taught me to cook,” you admit with a shy chuckle.

“Yeah, we had the luck to see parts of that,” Ellen chuckles as a video of you and your mom in the kitchen appears on the big screen behind you. It was posted to your Instagram when she attempted to teach you how to make her famous meatloaf. “It seems like you are a natural talent in the kitchen.”

“Well, I haven’t burned it down, so it’s going fine,” you chuckle.

“Alright, and what else did you do? Seen any good movies or discovered some new artists in the world of music?”

“Oh, absolutely. I definitely watched everything I’ve been postponing and I got to listen to new music, so now I have a few new favorites,” you admit smiling.

“Have you been listening to Harry Styles lately?” she asks and you find the question a little odd and very… specific.

“I mean, yes, but it wasn’t anything new, I really like his music,” you admit truthfully. “He is a great artist for sure.”

“Have you been at any of his concerts by any chance?” she asks and you notice that the audience is getting a little excited over something, but you don’t pay too much attention to it.

“Not yet, but I hope it’s gonna happen one day.”

“Well, I think I can get you tickets to see him,” a voice speaks up from behind you and immediately, the audience starts cheering as your head snaps around and you see none other than Harry Styles standing behind you. Your mouth hangs open as you feel yourself blushing, he is so tall and handsome, dressed in a bright blue suit with a silver shirt underneath, smiling down at you widely as he walks around the armchairs to greet you.

“Oh shit, I was not expecting this,” you breathe out as you stand up and hug him shortly before he moves over to greet Ellen as well.

“’M glad you like my music, Love,” he smiles as he sits in the armchair next to you and you swear you see him wink at you.

“We thought you wouldn’t mind our other guest joining in,” Ellen explains Harry’s appearance.

“Not at all,” you smile shaking your head. Harry has been your celebrity crush for quite a while, but the two of you just never crossed paths, until now.

“’S very nice to meet yeh,” he nods in your way.

“Same goes for you.”

“Okay, so now that Harry is here, I thought that we could play a little game,” Ellen announces reaching for something next to her armchair.

“Oh man,” you breathe out earning a round of laughter from the audience. “Last time we played something you asked me the most embarrassing burning questions!” you whine thinking back how you had to admit that you sleep with your lights on when it’s raining outside.

“We’ll do something similar this time too,” she chuckles before handing out two round boards to you and Harry as well.

“Oh fo’ fuck’s sake!” Harry groans making the audience laugh again. “Not this!”

“I know you loved it when we played it the last time,” Ellen grins as Harry hides his face behind the board that’s now showing his I HAVE sign towards the cameras. “We’re gonna play Never Have I Ever, I think you both know the rules.”

“Yes, this is why I want to run away now,” you mumble under your breath.

“I’m going with yeh,” Harry smirks at you finally letting his board drop to his knees. Seemingly, the audience is enjoying your misery.

“Don’t be babies, it’s gonna be fun!” “For who? Not me!” Harry exclaims making everyone in the studio laugh. “Should’ve asked what we’re gonna do before I said yes.”

“Too late, Harry. Alright, let’s start,” Ellen announces as she takes her card in her hands, picking the first one and she reads the lines on it. “Never have I ever had a crush on someone I worked with.”

You huff as you turn your board so the I HAVE side is facing the camera, while Ellen has the same side showing, but Harry shows the I HAVE NEVER.

“Never?” you ask Harry.

“Well, what do yeh mean by working with?” he asks with narrow eyes as he taps on his chin.

“Anyone you had any relations with through a job.”

“Well then…” he sighs turning the board, earning some cheering.

“Okay. Never have I ever drunk texted someone and regretted it in the morning,” Ellen continues with the next question.

“Oh, too often,” you blurt out holding up the I HAVE side.

“What did yeh write?” Harry asks with a cheeky smile while he holds up the same side.

“Well, there are just too many, I can’t choose,” you admit laughing. “I often tend to write down my feelings when I had a little too much to drink and then send it without a second thought.”

“Then I better get yeh drunk to find out what yeh think about me,” Harry teases and you hear a loud “ooh” coming from the audience while you can only hope your make up covers the blush on your cheeks.

“I’d need your number for that to happen,” you say arching an eyebrow at him.

“That’s something we can easily fix,” he smirks.

“Okay, before the two of you go on your first date right away, let’s finish the game,” Ellen jokes and you both turn to her. “Never have I ever kissed someone I didn’t know.”

“What do you mean by knowing someone?” you ask to clarify.

“Let’s say you didn’t even know their name,” she adds and as you think about it, you hold up the I HAVE NEVER side first, but then flip it over.

“Oh, something popped into yeh mind?” Harry teases while he holds up the I HAVE side as well.

“I guess I just want to forget about it, but I can’t,” you admit chuckling awkwardly.

“Were you drunk or you just didn’t care to ask for their name?” Ellen questions.

“I’ve had quite a few drinks if I’m being honest. But I think he told me his name, I just didn’t catch it,” you admit.

“Poor guy, he is completely forgotten,” Harry chimes in shaking his head in a dramatic way.

“Alright, we have two more questions. Never have I ever had a friend with benefits.”

“This game sucks!” you snap as you hold up the I HAVE side, making the audience laugh. “You’re making me look like such a bad person!” you whine to Ellen.

“Don’t feel so bad, Harry is in the same shoe!” she chuckles and turning to the man on your right you see that Harry has the same side showing and a very cheeky smirk on his lips.

“How did it end?” you ask out of curiosity. You know how yours ended, in a horrible fight, because he wanted more, but you were in it just for the fun.

“Not in the best way, if I’m bein’ honest,” he clears his throat leaning back in his seat. “How about yours?”

“Same,” you nod chuckling.

“I guess it was a learning lesson for the both of you,” Ellen smirks before reading the last question. “Never have I ever ghosted somebody.”

“Shit,” you mumble, trying to hide your smirk as you hold up the I HAVE side. Harry thinks to himself before doing the same. Leaning forward he checks yours and your eyes meet for a moment.

“I think it would be an honor to anyone to be ghosted by yeh,” he teases you making you roll your eyes. “Wha’? ‘M telling the truth!” he chuckles.

“Wanna get on the list of my ghosted people?” you joke raising your eyebrows at him and he immediately holds his hands up.

“Would rather not.” He places a hand over his heart before smiling in your way sweetly. “Tha’ would break m’ heart.”

“Oh come on!” you chuckle feeling the heat crawling up your neck and cheeks as the audience lets out a soft “aww” at his words.

“Alright, thank you for playing, I think we found out some interesting things about the both of you.”

“Thanks for embarrassing us,” you add mumbling as you hand her back the board.

“It was a pleasure,” she chuckles. “We’ll be right back after a short break, please stay with us, we have more from Y/N and Harry coming right in your way, so stay tuned!” she announces as the crowd cheers.

“Friends with benefits, huh?” Harry asks smirking in your way as you fix your dress. You just shrug your shoulder trying to look casual when you feel so intimidated sitting next to him.

“Had to try it, I guess,” you admit.

“I get it,” he chuckles. “So, if I were to ask for yeh number, would I eventually be ghosted as well?”

You have to bite into your bottom lip to hide your growing smile at his attempt to flirt with you.

“We’ll see. You gotta ask for it first,” you tell him with a knowing smile, hoping to look flirty and light, not the nervous wreck that you truly feel like talking to him.

“I think my dressing room is two doors down yours, so expect me to drop by after this,” he smirks, making your heart skip a beat before Ellen starts speaking and the taping continues.

NEXT PART

30 - a rat.

Previous chapter her son.

m.list.

warnings: this series contains themes of yandere\mafia, blood, violence, mental health, drugs, non-con.

author note: this is pure fiction and it is not intended to romanticize any of the situations mentioned bellow.

As soon as the door clicked closed, you broke down in tears, sobs erupting from your chest..

Jeno sighs at your dramatic antics, “he’ll be back, stop crying”. You shake your head ,“you don’t know that, how could you let them take him?”.

“They didn’t take him, he went with them” he corrects you, his pattens running thin. “Still, you should have done something” you insist through the hiccups. He walks away and throws himself on the couch, typing on his phone not paying you any more attention.

After a while your cries has calmed down and you sneaked to the same couch he was on, you curl in its corner. “they can’t be suspecting him right? He was with me, here” you think out loud sharing your concerns with jeno who was seemingly in another dimension, deep into his thoughts, if everything is fine why is he acting like this?.

He snaps back into his body “what?”, he didn’t hear you the first time so you repeat yourself. He release a heavy sigh, pushing away whatever was occupying his mind “yeah.. you’er right” he attempt a smile but it fails before it reaches his eyes. 

He keeps fumbling with his fingers, a classic expression of anxiety. 

A knock on the door interrupts the intense quietness, he goes to open the door without even asking who is it. You follow him to see if it is jaemin, but to your disappointment it was haechan, the mere mention of his name turns your stomach, the sight of his face making your skin crawl with hatred. he greats jeno, patting his back in comforting manner, a torrid look on his face.

He greats you as soon as he sees you but you roll your eyes and turn around heading to jaemin’s room to avoid being in the same room with him, but what was being said stopped you in your tracks. Haechan was telling jeno not to worry.. “Don’t worry man, I told them you were with me all night… ” he continues as they walk inside and sit on the couch, “.. they did too, don’t worry they know better than to slip”. 

They didn’t know you were just around the corner eavesdropping, that asshole sounds smug like he was proud of himself for almost getting away with it, almost.

Although his voice is low and you have missed some parts of the conversation, it was clear what he was reffing to, Jeno was lying to the police about last night and haechan was covering him.

Your blood reached its boiling point, they were letting jaemin take the fall for jeno’s doings, fueled by anger you storm to where they were catching them by surprise, “you lied!” You scream pointing your accusatory finger towards jeno, “You killed yangyang and now you are letting jaemin take the fall for you! after all he has done for you, you lowlife piece of shit!! ..” jeno jumps form his seat, striding towards you like an angry bull  but you don’t stop “im telling him as soon as he gets back, you’er gonna pay fo..” your shouting was cut off by his hand the is blasted on your mouth shut your stupid mouth” he growls, his face has turned red with rage “shut your mouth or else I will rip off your tongue! You think you know what are you talking about huh?” His other hand tightens its hold on the back of your neck, fingernails almost breaking into your skin, his eyes pours into your destroying your courage and installing the filmier fear instead, shakes were invading your limbs and tears were pooling into the corners of your eyes. 

his face breaks out of the horrifying angry expression and he let’s you go, he recomposes himself before he speaks calmly “it’s not what you think okay?”, you keep your eyes glued to his chest out of sheer fear of looking up at him again, you bite your lower lip to stop the trembles.

He sigh again and runs his finger through his hair, his hands come to grab your shoulders but you flinch away. he tsk, disappointed in himself not in you, he tries again “sera, look at me, im not going to hurt you” this time his hands grab your shoulders without hesitation disregarding your dismay, he leans down to your level, but you avert your eyes. your gaze falls on his right arm, the freshly inked tattoos catches your attention, new two lines next to the previous ones.

A gentle shake brings you back to jeno’s voice “he’ll be back any minute by now, go wait in his room”.

Though you don’t believe him, what options do you have other than to do what you were told, so you go to jaemin’s room and lock the door behind you.

It doesn’t take long for your pryers to be heard this time, jaemin is back, safe and sound.

You unlock the door and run to him, he opens his arms for you, you jump and wrap both of your arms and legs around him “I was so worried, thank god” you speak into his shoulder, he hums and tightens his arms around to bring you even closer to him if that is possible. 

He puts you down and pats your head as he greats haechan who was getting up to leave, wishing you all a good night. As soon as haechan was out of the door jeno asks jaemin “So, what did they want?”, the faux innocence he was carrying infuriates you beyond words.

“Umm” he sighs, not knowing where to starts. “they still don’t believe me” he plops down into the couch and you follow him, his arm circles around you bringing closer to his side, you look at jeno, this is his chance to come clean, but he remains silent, and if jeno his best friend won’t stand for him then you will. 

“What do you mean they don’t believe you? I was with you I will testify for you” you tell jaemin, Jaemin’s face looks tired, his smile is weak. He looks at you with adoring eyes,  “I know you would” he brings your head closer to his lips and presses a kiss to calm the panic the was loud in your voice, he takes your hand in his and intertwining your fingers together “it’s gonna be alright” he tells you again.

You bite your tongue and wait for jeno to go to his room, so you can tell jaemin what he jeno was hiding, as soon as jeno closed his door leaving you two alone cuddling on the couch you turned to jaemin, “he did it, and haechan is covering for him.. he is lying to you” you try to explain to jaemin as best as you could, you must have sounded crazy because he doesn’t seems alarmed, shocked or even bothered by what you were telling him.

He lets you finish and hums, he was mindlessly twirling a brand of your hair around his finger, “did he now?” He voice drags, he laughs at your puzzled face, ‘aww you’er so cute you know that? Ratting on him..  I know he did it baby. He told me” he watches your face contracts in confession, “But glad to know that I have a loyal angle by my side” before he leans in and to softly kiss your cheek “don’t worry, and don’t hurt your pretty head with too much thinking, okay?”.

First Man - Charlie Gillespie x Reader

Request: NONE

Word Count: 1735 words 

Summary: the song First Man by Camila Cabello but make it about Charlie Gillespie

Warnings: i think theres one swear word and thats all ?

A/N: so i had originally written this for another fandom that i am no longer in but i decided to change it to charlie cause why not  this is literally just the song first man by camila cabello, so go listen to that if you dont know it haha  again i tried to make this gender neutral but i may have messed up at one point so if i did im very sorry  anyways hope you enjoy this little fluffy piece 

Tag List:  @happinessinthedarkesttimes​ @littlemissaddict @vicesvsvirtuesfanfic @headheartbellarke @lovesanimals​ @bartok-the-bat @juliefromaustralia @multi-universe21 @rangerelik

Winter 2019

It was a mild Winter's afternoon in LA. You walked down the stairs of your family home, bag in hand, smiling when you spotted your family sitting around the table, a board game in the middle.

"Y/N! Come join us!" Your mum called when she spotted you enter the room. You shook your head.

"Maybe another time, sorry guys. I'm actually just heading out, I'm gonna stay with Charlie tonight... is that okay?" Your father sighed before nodding.

"When will we get to meet this Charlie boy that we hear so much about?" He asked, standing up to walk over to you. You shrugged.

"I'm not too sure, but it will be soon, I promise." You grinned. Your little sister looked up from the game board.

"What's he like Y/N?" She asked, looking at you intently. A soft smile appeared on your face at the thought of your boyfriend.

"He's really sweet. He's funny, just like you Dad. He’s not super tall but it doesn’t even matter. And he loves dragging me along on hikes." You paused.

"I really like him." You finished. Your dad frowned slightly, but hid it quickly.

"That's nice to hear darling. Don't forget a jacket, okay?" He told you. You looked at your father knowingly. He had been like this with every boy you’d ever brought home, not that you'd brought home tons of boys before.

"No it's okay, it’s not that cold outside today. Besides, he's waiting outside for me." You said, glancing down at your phone to see the text from Charlie.

'I'm here' it read. You looked back up again, noticing your father watching you. He stepped closer, pulling you into a hug.

"Don't freak out Dad, I'll be fine." You assured him. He squeezed you tightly.

"I just worry about you." You smiled, pulling away.

"I know, I get that. But I'm an adult now Dad. I got this."

"I know, I know." He sighed. By now the rest of the family had gone back to their game.

You patted your dad on the chest before turning to leave, stopping when your hand touched the doorknob. You turned back around to face your father.

"Just remember Dad, you were the first man that really loved me." And with that you turned back to the door and left, leaving your dad to smile sadly. His little baby was growing up.

 Summer 2020

It was Summer and you and Charlie had a few days off from work. You had decided to head back to LA together, to visit your family. After all, you had been dating for over a year and Charlie still hadn't met your family yet. The family that you spoke so highly of.

You touched down at LAX and made your way through security quickly.

"You ready?" You asked, holding tightly to Charlie's hand as you made your way to baggage claim, where you had organised to meet your parents.

"Honestly? I'm fucking petrified." Charlie responded, causing you to laugh.

"You'll be fine. Everyone loves you Char, and my family will be no different." You walked around the corner, spotting your Dad quickly.

"Dad!" You called, rushing over to hug your father. Charlie walked over slowly. You pulled away and grinned, glancing at Charlie.

"Dad, I'd like to meet my boyfriend, Charlie." You introduced. "Char, this is my dad, Sam."

Charlie held his hand out for your dad to shake.

"It's nice to officially meet you Mr Y/L/N. Can I call you Sam?" He smiled nervously. Your father looked him up and down before taking his hand and shaking it.

"Sir will do. Charlie, short for Charles I assume?" His glare was stone cold. Charlie swallowed, nodding.

"Yes sir, but I prefer Charlie." Your father nodded before turning his attention back to you.

"How long are you two here for?" He asked, ignoring Charlie, who moved to grab the both of your bags that were coming along the carousel.

"We have 8 days off, but we're only here for 4." You responded. Your dad nodded.

"Well I guess that's better than nothing. Come on let's go, your mother is waiting in the car outside. She didn't want to pay for parking so she's been driving around while I waited in here."

And with that the three of you headed outside to the car.

 Luckily for Charlie the rest of your family weren't as scary as your father was.

Your mother was lovely, and she had been very welcoming, even speaking to him in French when it was brought up that the two shared a common language.

Your brothers were really cool and invited him to join them to play video games whenever he wanted.

And your little sister, well, she adored the Canadian boy from the minute he walked through the front door.

And just like that Charlie’s first day at the Y/L/N house was over.

After sitting outside for hours with you and your parents, Charlie decided to head off to bed, and with a quick kiss for you and a murmured "goodnight" he was gone.

"So what do you think?" You asked once you knew that Charlie was well and truly inside.

"He's lovely darling." Your mother told you, smiling. You turned to your father.

"Dad?" You asked. Your father shrugged.

"He's not too bad, I guess." He admitted. You shook your head slightly. Of course your father would say that.

"I met his family you know? They're really nice, just like you guys." You told your parents.

"Oh, that's good sweetie." Your mum grinned.

"His parents are great, they're really down to earth. And his brothers and sister are really cool. Plus they love their hockey." You looked at your dad as you said the last part, knowing how big of a hockey fan he was. Your dad nodded in appreciation.

"That's good to hear. If they like hockey they must be good people." Your mother nodded in agreement with her husband. You fell into a comfortable silence for a few seconds.

"You know..." You began, breaking the silence. "I think he might be the one." Your mother put her hand up to her mouth, unable to hide her excitement.

"Oh Y/N, you really think so?" She asked. You nodded.

"Yeah, I really love him." You smiled.

"And he's a good man?" Your dad questioned, fixing his gaze on you. You nodded quickly.

"I swear on my heart. He loves me, and he'd never hurt me." You assured him.

"Good." He said, and with that the conversation was over, the topic changing to gossip about a family friend who's husband had cheated on her.

And later when you were heading off to bed you made sure to give your dad an extra big hug and remind him softly that he was the first man that really loved you.

 The four days passed quickly and before anyone knew it, it was time for you and Charlie to leave.

Your family gathered on the driveway, next to Charlie’s car that he had collected on your second day back. After a few hugs with your siblings Charlie moved to bid farewell to your parents. Your mother pulled him into a hug.

"It was lovely to meet you darling." She said softly, before pulling away.

"You too." He smiled. "It was lovely to meet all of you."

"Don't be a stranger Charlie." She said.

"Yeah come back all the time." Your little sister agreed. Charlie nodded.

"I'll make sure of it." He turned his attention to your father, holding out his hand for him to shake. Your father took it, shaking it firmly.

"Thank you for having me sir." Charlie smiled politely. Your father paused, before faking a smile.

"It was no problem." You exchanged a knowing look with your mother. You both knew that your father didn't think that Charlie deserved you.

After a few more goodbyes you and Charlie hopped into the car and left, waving to your family as you pulled out. You had barely made it to the end of the street before you grabbed Charlie's arm.

"Wait we need to go back." You said quickly.

"Why?" Charlie asked, but turned around nonetheless.

"I forgot to tell my dad something." He pulled up in front of the house and you jumped out quickly, rushing over to your father who was still outside. He looked at you in confusion.

"I forgot to say, remember you were the first man who really loved me." You smiled softly, and with one last hug you left again.

 Spring 2022

It was a beautiful Spring day in Hawaii. You and your father were stood together at the top of the beach, dressed to the nines, him in a fancy suit and you in your chosen wedding outfit.

It was almost time.

Time for you to walk down the aisle and marry the love of your life.

You looked over at your father, noticing his tie was slightly crooked. You took a step closer, and fixed the tie, watching as he tried to fight back the tears that were threatening to fall. You smiled softly at him.  

"You know, I've never seen you cry before." You whispered. Your dad smiled, a tear falling down his cheek.

"You just look so beautiful Y/N. No matter what, you'll always be my little baby." He responded, pulling you into a hug.

As you separated the music began to play, and he held his arm out for you to take.

"Here we go." You whispered, and the two of you began your walk down the beach to where Charlie was waiting, teary eyed, at the end of the aisle.

As you walked, your father found himself looking over at you, taking in the tears of happiness and the look of love that you were giving Charlie. Your dad smiled to himself, glad that you had finally found the perfect man for you.

You reached the end of the aisle and you pulled your father into a hug.

"Remember," You whispered. "You were the first man who really loved me." You pulled away, stepping back. Your dad hesitated for a second before stepping forward to pull Charlie into a hug.

"Take care of my little angel." He whispered. Charlie nodded.

"Of course Sir." They pulled apart and your dad smiled softly.

"You can call me Sam."

𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐜𝐤

challenge: time travel challenge by @justagirlinafandomworld​

prompt: “we’re divorced?” 

pairing: sirius black x reader

words: 5.7k words

warnings: FOURTH WALL BREAK!!(sorry im very excited about that), lots of angst, almost smut(hehe), sirius lowkey has a breeding kink, sirius is an asshole for a bit, the smallest bit of fluff, fix-it, and the same time travel theory as back to the future

summary: an unnatural occurrence lets a woman go back in time to try and change everything she’s known for the past twenty years.

a/n: wow, i normally don’t write for harry potter so this was a nice change. anyways, this is for yvette’s time travel writing challenge, and everybody say HAPPY BIRTHDAY YVETTE! i’m so sorry this is late, it got deleted and i needed to re-edit, but i truly appreciate your friendship and your lovely, amazingly beautiful self, and I’m so so glad that we became friends :)  this fic is not beta-read at all, so if you see any mistakes tell me, but otherwise i really hope you enjoy this fic<3

main masterlist || harry potter masterlist

It still wasn’t over. After all she had lost, more specifically everyone she had lost, and the shitty cycle that she had to call her life, it still wasn’t over. The people she had watched the life drain from, the screams of those suffering from the loss caused by the Dark Lord, and yet life still hadn’t had its fill of torturing Y/N. Grimmauld Place felt empty without the kids, without the Weasleys, but they had gone back to their home and soon enough she would have to as well. Harry had gone back to Hogwarts with Dumbledore, though she’d argued to hold onto him just a bit longer after-

After Sirius had died. 

Time had passed, maybe two or three weeks, but no matter what the woman couldn’t bring herself to get out of Sirius’ old bedroom, simply staring at the ceiling with her tears at bay. Her and Sirius had been a complicated thing, to say the least, a topic nobody had brought up since 1983, when she had banned it. Not as if there was much to talk about after the divorce and Sirius going to Azkaban. After Lily and James had died, after she had fought with Dumbledore for custody of Harry, after she had become a professor at Beauxbatons and moved to France without a second thought. Sirius had been locked up after he’d hurt her in the worst possible way, and Y/N’s heartbroken soul found no other reason to return to England. 

But, she pushed those bad memories to the back of her mind. It seemed so trivial, looking back on it. Not the broken house, of course, that had been his own mistake. But Y/N had many regrets, all of them seeming to revolve around the mischievous black-haired man who she had fallen in love with as a teen. The night it went down, the night their relationship had fractured at the seams and fallen down, was her greatest one however. It had been so stupid, so, so stupid, but they’d both gotten caught up in the moment, and Y/N had let him die without knowing how much she was sorry for that night that they let their fears consume them. 

The cries that she had tried so hard to contain finally broke free from the restraints of her heart. “I’m so sorry, Siri,” she whispered into the air, “I couldn’t save you this time.” As the hot, salty tears ran down her cheeks, Y/N shuffled across the room, letting her feet drag her to the old Black family room, the dark green walls embracing her rainy emotions. 

A little gasp escaped her lips as she looked at the portraits among the wall. The Black family tree was faded along the age-old wall, but what she was really looking for was the burned out image of her raven-haired love. There, right next to Regulus, was a black spot, scorned and scarred by the prestigious family for being a blood traitor. Y/N smiled and traced the burn with her finger, remembering their fourth year when she had accompanied him home for the holidays so he wouldn’t be completely alone in the hellhole he had to call his house. Sirius had snuck them up to this room and spent the night talking in hushed whispers sworn secrets. “I’ll be yours forever, Siri, and I’m sorry for fighting with you. I wish-” she sniffled, glaring at the spot in the wall as she tried to garble out her words, “I wish, I could go back in time, and just fix it. Just me and you, and that stupid night, with the bloody fight about children because you deserve it all, darling.”

“Ah, I think you can.” 

Y/N turned around, her eyes wide with fear. That was not Kreacher’s voice. There stood a younger woman, around nineteen, a scroll of paper and a quill in her hand. There was a whisper of a smirk on her face, brown eyes glittering even in the dimness in the room. “Who the hell are you?” Y/N looked at the door, which was still closed as she left it. She cast her wand out, pointing it at the stranger who did nothing but smile. “How did you get in here? Are you with the Lord?”

“With Voldemort?” The woman simply laughed. “Dude, I’m not with ‘the Lord’,” she added with air quotations. “Also I’m not really even here, so don’t you worry about that. My name’s Malia.”

Malia held her hand out, but Y/N kept her guard up. “You’re American. What brings you here? Are you a muggle?”

“Oh, nope, not a wizard, I’m just the author of this story.” Malia confided. “I’m here to tell you that you can fix this.”

“Fix… what?” Malia just rolled her eyes and sighed, staring up towards the ceiling as she spoke.

“God, did I write you to be hard of hearing now, too? I ought to fix that when I get back.” The woman blankly stared at the strange girl, wondering what the actual fuck she was talking about. “I can give you the chance to go back in time, Y/N. It won’t be for long, it’s really not gonna be interesting for more than two hours at most, but that should be enough time to tell the gang about what’s to come with Voldemort.”

“Like... time travel?” Y/N asked. The only way she knew how to time travel was the time turners. “But all of the ti-”

“Time turners were destroyed in the Department of Mysteries, I know, I know. Trust me, I’ve read Harry Potter more times than I’ve said ‘I love you’ to my parents.” Malia smiled. “I’m the author, I make the rules, and my rule is that I’m giving you two hours in 1978 to talk to Sirius so he can fix the emotional fucking mess left behind by J.K. Rowling.”

“Who’s J.K. Rowling?” Malia shuddered at the name.

“A raggedy-ass, transphobic bitch who wrote y’all into existence, but she’s not of importance right now.” She checked the small, rectangular box in her hand, which glowed and provided little light in the darkened room. “Let’s see, it’s currently eleven-forty, so you have until one-forty to find the Marauders and fix this future. It may not be fixed in the books in the future, but if you are able to do it here that’s all that matters.” Malia’s brown eyes were downcast, her bright and loud personality dimming for just a moment before returning to Y/N’s confused gaze once more. “Try not to screw up too much while you’re there, just enough that you defeat the Dark Lord the first time. Tell Sirius all you know and that should be enough for him to fix all the mistakes, but do not under any circumstances let him or anyone else know who you are. I wish you luck, Y/N, it was nice to meet ya in person.” 

And with a peace sign in front of her face, she disappeared into a flash of neon pink light. 

“Bloody hell! Fix my future? Talk to Sirius? If this even is time travel, then how am I supposed to get there- AH!” Y/N’s body felt like it was turning inside out, her guts being torn from her stomach and back into it again. A delirious giggle arose from her lips in the black void she was pulled into, and a soft chatter could be heard, like voices at the end of a tunnel. 

“Blimey, looks like we got ourselves a nutter on school grounds.” Y/N’s arms flailed around, desperately seeking some sort of grounding surface to hold on to when her back hit a rough surface. There was an audible crack somewhere in her body, but she felt so sick that she couldn’t tell where. 

“Are you okay, ma’am? You just appeared from the sky and hit the ground.” Warm, brown eyes met Y/N’s, a familiar mess of black curls resting atop of the boy’s head. Large, rounded glasses sat perched on the tip of his nose, and an impish smile, one she used to know so well before he died, met his lips. 

“James,” she sighed. The boy stared at her strangely, and only then did she notice the three other boys and girls each behind them. Remus, Peter, Sirius, Lily, Marlene, and Alice. 

Sirius.

The sight that met her eyes made her nearly emotional. It had technically been only three weeks since she had seen him, but here was the young boy she had fallen in love with. The one who charmed her with his smart words and witty retorts to her brush-offs, who used to hold her in his arms in the most intimate and gentle ways. His grey eyes sparkled with curiosity, the infamous Marauder mischief swirling within the silvery pools.  

Seeing him so young tugged at her heartstrings, and though she wanted nothing more than to hold him in her arms and never let go, a small, niggling feeling at the back of her head held her back. Was there something wrong?

“You know me?” Oh right, she was currently thirty-five. Looking around she noticed that she was outside the quidditch pitch, and there were other students, staring at her with widened eyes. No one knew she was Y/N L/N, their fellow schoolmate and probably one of the very few of them that survived the Death Eaters attacks. None of them were aware how it ended, or how it was currently going for them back in 1996, and in this time there was the first Wizarding War going on and they had every right to be terrified for their lives.

James now took a more defensive stance, standing tall and holding his wand out. “Who are you?”

She couldn’t give him the answer, instead letting her mouth gape open as she stared at him with wide eyes. Y/N looked across the grounds for the nearest exit, which was down by Hagrid’s hut and into the Forbidden Forest. It was her only choice at this point, to hide in the dark, creepy space, maybe just until the students went away so she could find Sirius and talk to him alone. It’d be hard to separate him from the boys, but if Lily were occupied with James it sure would be easy. 

Her younger, seventh-year self didn’t seem to be in the audience, thank Merlin, and with that knowledge, she got up and ran, ignoring her screaming muscles. That time travel really did a number on her. 

As she ran through the crowd, shoving people aside, she heard the students mutter, too much in shock and disarray to stop the crazy, old woman who knew James Potter.

“This is dodgy.”

“Someone ought to tell Dumbledore about this.”

“She kinda looks like Y/N L/N.’

“Don’t insult the poor girl like that, that wonker is ages old.”

“Come back here! Who the bloody hell are you?” Y/N’s heart beat quickly in her chest, threatening to burst out. Only three minutes in the past and it was all going straight to shit. “Stupefy!”

Shit. “No, James, please don’t-“ Her body hit the ground and her eyes closed, the last thing she saw being the pumpkin patch by the hut.

-

“I see you’re awake now, Ms. L/N.” Dumbledore stood above Y/N in the hospital ward bed, his grey beard dangling in front of her face. Her first instinct was to start blaming him for everything that had happened, starting from Lily and James’ deaths to Sirius’, already opening her mouth to call him an old, senile cow, but then she realized that Harry hadn’t been sent to the Dursleys yet, much less been born yet, so none of it would have an effect on him. Y/N’s second instinct was to question how Dumbledore knew who she was in 1978, but her former Headmaster started to speak before she could do so. “I must admit, it’s very courageous, that stunt you just pulled. I don’t think Ms. Louie will be too happy about that.” Y/N sent him a questioning stare. “Malia, the girl you met earlier. Malia Louie.”

“Headmaster Dumbledore, how did you know it was me?” She was dressed in a white gown that went to her knees, and behind him she could see her blouse and jeans folded and clean. Ah, the Hospital Wing. She had brought the boys here more times than she could count in her years at Hogwarts. “I don’t exactly look as young as I used to.”

“Ah, don’t worry Ms. L/N, you’ve kept your good looks quite nicely, even in your older age.” He stroked his beard thoughtfully, his wrinkled eyes sparkling with joy. “And speaking of young, if you are still worrying yourself about your younger self, you can put that to a stop. I am aware that you are not able to tell anyone who you are, and time travel is exceptionally dangerous if you are seen by the other version of yourself. I’ve already told the students that you were just a stray witch, misguided in your ways and that you were well taken care of. However, I think that brings us to the question of what your intentions are in the past, Ms. L/N.”

“Headmaster, I don’t think I can tell you about my business here. I’ve already messed up by letting the school see me by letting everyone see me, I don’t know why that girl even sent me here, it’s clear that this was a mistake.” Y/N sat up on the headboard, feeling her eyes fill with tears once again. The tall arches of windows let the sun in the room, and she could see the specks of dust swirling around in the golden light. It had to be close to the end of the year for them, maybe sometime around April or May, near the end of N.E.W.T.s at least. She could imagine that it’d be easy for her to get out of Hogwarts for the day, with all the students studying for the stressful exams in the library, maybe she'd make her way to Hogsmeade and walk around or visit Hagrid under a false name to have some tea. He was always open for a nice cuppa with strangers on any free day he had. “Thank you Headmaster, for your kindness, but I really ought to be going. I-it was nice to see you.”

Y/N started to help herself out of the bed, swinging her feet over to touch the cool stone ground. Bones cracked with pain and fatigue, her muscles stretching sluggishly. Merlin, that she was not expecting that much hurt from the fall, but she should have never underestimated James Potter. No one ever should if they want to keep their good mind and sanity. 

Dumbledore handed her her clothes, cracked lips set in a straight line as he nodded solemnly. “I hope you accomplish whatever it is you are here to do, Ms. L/N, but I have no doubt that you will.” With a sly wink, he added, “You were always one of our most ardent and bright students.”

Y/N let herself smile, and with a wave, swiftly brought herself to the door. “Thank you, Headmaster.”

After slipping outside, she ran down the corridors, echoes of her feet ringing lightly behind her. The courtyard proved to be empty and she quickly ducked behind a column and tugged her jeans on hastily, making sure that no professors came walking past. Though the sky proved to be bright and cheerful, a slight breeze carried through, making her fall off balance and fall on the cemented ground. 

“Are you okay, darling? You look like you’re in need of a little help.” Y/N looked up to the speaking figure, one that she both loved and dreaded to see. 

She gathered herself quickly, her mind running fast and heart beating out of her chest as she tried to get out. “Yes, I am okay, thank you for asking. I think I’ll just get up and going now, I don’t need to take time out of your day like this-”

“I know who you are, Y/N.” 

Y/N came to a full stop, going against her brain that screamed at her to run away. Sirius looked downtrodden, his grey eyes watering despite the small hint of a smirk on his face. Though he was always one for playing around and not taking anything seriously, she knew when it was time to stop pretending and get real. “How’d you know it was me, Sirius?”

“You really don’t look bad for your age, darling.” He offered her a hand to help her up and she took it graciously, eyeing him nearly guiltily and forgetting about her promise to Y/N. But that was useless now, this moment with her first love was much more important. “Also you have the tattoo on your chest. I knew it was you the moment you landed on school grounds.”

She traced his gaze to her left collarbone, where a paw print, just barely visible beneath her low-cut blouse, sat. It was his, or Snuffles’, paw print, and at this point in time they had probably gotten it done about three months before. He had one for her too, a horseshoe for her horse patronus, right on his left side of his chest too. So they’d always be right next to each other’s hearts, as cheesy as it seemed.

But they were dumb, lovesick teenagers, and they acted the part well too. Their love was all-consuming, shagging in under the bleachers at the quidditch pitch and making out under the stars. It was fast, everything was fast, decisions, ideas, classes, all of them under the impression that they had to do everything right then or they’d be dead before they got to actually live. They had dreams of marriage, and a big, big family, obviously so far away from his family so they could never hurt their children’s lives the way they had hurt his. 

They were fantasies, Y/N had known that well enough when she and Sirius got divorced, but it was something that eighteen year-old Sirius Black held close to his heart. No matter how shitty his life got, he was always a firm believer in a happy ending. In their happy ending. 

“How am I right now?” They now stood over the Black Lake, staring into the glittering depths of the water where some mermaids could be seen sneaking peeks at the handsome boy and the strange lady who had fallen from the sky. 

Sirius stared at her questioningly for a moment. “How are you doing right now? I mean, I believe that I should be asking you that ques- oh, Merlin, I’m such a git, you meant your younger self.” Y/N laughed at that, her heart lifting with the goofiness of the old Sirius relieving an ache in her heart that she had had for so long. Not that old (it felt weird to say that) Sirius had been anything less than silly and snarky, but it was never directed towards her. It was nice to have the resemblance of their old relationship back, even if it was just for a fleeting moment. “I suppose that you’re okay. You didn’t see, well, your big moment on the field, but at this point Lily has probably opened her big, fat mouth and told you. N.E.W.T.s are just finishing up, so you’re much more light-hearted than during the study season.”

“I really did have a stick up my arse during exam time, you always told me to loosen up-” 

“Y/N, cut out the small talk, I think it’s okay for me to ask how and what is happening.” Sirius cut in.

So she told him. Y/N had always been upfront with people about everything. Or rather, she had learned how to be upfront with people after her and Sirius’ divorce. Without details of the deaths, she explained how she was sent back into the past to fix it in some conceivable way. However, she did tell him about the fall out. Maybe she wanted him to understand her pain, even though it was a younger him, but she had to admit to herself that it was because she just wanted Sirius, in whatever form life gave her to hear out her grievances and apologies. 

Since her Sirius was dead before she could.

“We’re divorced?” Sirius looked about ready to break down into tears, almost as if the concept of them breaking up or separating was foreign to him. “What exactly did we fight over, Y/N? That doesn’t seem normal for the two of us.” Sirius asked.

“Well, to be fair, it wasn’t a normal predicament for us. either…”

Sirius slammed the door shut, efficiently pinning her against it with his white button up ruffled up, navy tie hanging from his neck loosely. Y/N’s arms were held down tightly against the oak wood, the sensation of the cold door burning into her rather warm skin making her squeal. Her husband’s tongue worked its way through her parted lips, low groans rising from the back of his throat from the way she moaned in tandem with his hips pushing into hers. Legs wrapped around his tapered waist, the pink, floral skirt Y/N wore rising high on her thighs, revealing more of her flesh to the lust-filled man. Both of their giggles echoed off the hallway walls of their small cottage home, just four miles west of their best friends’. 

As the twenty year-old man threw his wife unceremoniously on the bed, he shed himself of his shirt and swiftly unbuttoned his slacks, throwing them haphazardly across the room. Merlin, Y/N looked ethereal laying spread out on the bed, panties around her left ankle, swollen lips parted with short puffs of air leaving them. “You just get right down to business, don’t you, Black.” 

Crawling over his body, his hot breath hit her neck as he growled against her skin. “Could say the same thing about you, darling.” Sirius’ lips made their way down every inch, every curve, nook, and cranny of Y/N’s body, smoothly slipping her clothes off as he did so. Her sweet gasps filled the bedroom, back arching off the bed to meet his chest. “I’m going to put a baby in you tonight, sweetheart, we’re-”

Y/N sat up straight, her eyebrows trained in confusion at her husband. “What? A baby?” 

Sirius’ heart pounded in his chest. “Yes.” He remarked in a clipped tone. “Is that not what you wanted?” 

Her mind recalled her words from earlier that day, as she chatted happily with Lily about the news of her pregnancy. “Siri, I said I may one day enjoy having a kid of my own. Not right now, of course, but later. After all, we only got married a few months ago, don’t you think we should hold off a bit on that? We’re twenty years-old, Siri, there’s so many years for that.”

Rage filled Sirius’ blood like a spreading fire. In all honesty, it wasn’t so much about his anger as it was his hurt and fear. Fear that she had realized how fucked up he truly was, fear that she realized what he had known all along- that she deserved better than him. “So you don’t want a baby with me?”

“I never said I didn’t want that, Sirius, I just said that I’m not ready!” Y/N yelled back. At this point both of them stood on opposite sides of the bed, faces hot with tears. “We’re in the middle of a bloody war, people we know, people we love, have lost their lives, and it is not the ideal environment to raise a child, Sirius! Just because James and Lily are ready to have one doesn’t mean that I am too!”

“When will you be ready, Y/N? When will it ever be enough time for you? When will I be enough for you?” The heartbroken girl tried to interject, but her voice was cut off by her husband’s quickly enough. Sirius climbed onto the bed, holding her chin harshly with one hand. “Tell me, did you ever want to be with me in the first place?”

“Yes, Sirius, of course I wanted to be with you.” His heart hurt looking at the love of his life in tears, but even that was able to melt his cold facade. “I love you more than anything in the world.” 

“Then fucking prove it, Y/N.” With that declaration, he removed his hand from her face and gathered his clothes, slamming everything in their shared room as Y/N quivered, knees ready to buckle on the spot. “I’m going out, don’t wait up for me.”  

As soon as the front door shut, she fell to the ground in tears, the laughter that once filled their home replaced with the sound of her shattered heart. 

Y/N had done her best to not tear up during her explanation of the events that had taken that night, but Sirius' eyes watered, refusing to believe the truth. “No. No. I didn’t do that. Y/N, tell me,” he gripped her biceps with trembling hands, “please tell me I didn’t really do that. I can’t believe that I-I, that I-”

“You were drunk, Sirius, I don’t think you truly knew what you were saying at the time.” She sighed, “But people always say that drunken words are just sober thoughts.” Y/N rubbed her arms, just shivering slightly in the Scotland breeze. “You came back two hours later punching the wall and breaking it, and that’s when I knew that we wouldn’t last.” 

The raven-haired boy’s head started to shake, even more mortified of the actions that his future self, the man he’d be in just two years' time, had done. “I packed up my things, not that there were many, we’d only moved into the house a month before, left, and I sent the divorce papers a week later. It was probably better that way, you would’ve divorced me if I hadn’t done it first.” Y/N had gotten used to telling her sob story to colleagues at Beauxbatons, to her family, but it felt different with pre-divorce Sirius. Of course, she had never thought she’d be in this citation either, so no one could really blame her for feeling weird. “You signed them easily, and my lawyer made sure that I never had to see you again.”  Until Lily and James died.

“Until…” Sirius led on.

“Merlin’s beard, Sirius, you’ve always been able to read my mind. Shouldn’t have doubted it for a second.” He smiled at the sentiment, gesturing for her to continue. “I can’t tell you, Sirius, I hope you can understand that.”

“Why, Y/N, what happens that can be any worse in the future?” Oh dear, Sirius, you really do not want the answer to that question. She needed any way out of this conversation, after all running away was what she did best, and her eyes already searched for several routes to which she could run. Not that Y/N could ever outrun Sirius in his animagus form, but it was nice to have the belief that she could. The boy sensed her distress and grabbed hold of her hand. “You don’t have to tell me, darling, but I have to admit that I am a bit worried, just in the slightest.”

Y/N let herself calm down, squeezing Sirius’ hand and noticing his watch. She had actually given him that watch, gold-plated and dark grey metal, but it wasn’t the beauty of the gift that caught her eye, but rather the actual time on it. One-thirty. 

How had that much time gone by so quickly? She was going to be sucked into the black void of time travel again in ten minutes, and that wasn’t nearly enough time to unload nearly twenty years worth of history onto Sirius. No, he would go insane from that much knowledge, which was exactly against what Malia had advised. 

“I don’t have enough time to tell you everything that happens in the future, Sirius. But what I am about to tell you is vital, absolutely vital for the good of all of us in the future.” Sirius nodded with a serious sort of smile on his face. “Don’t let Peter be Lily and James’ secret keeper. When the time comes that they move away, I’m not going to tell you where yet, do not under any circumstances let Peter be their secret keeper. I know he’s one of our best friends right now, and do not tell anyone about this, but he’s going to betray us in the worst way possible.” 

While Sirius was shocked, he nodded solemnly and ran a hand through his long hair. “I won’t tell anyone, Y/N. Can I fix us, Y/N? I don’t know if you should be letting the key to a happier future rest in my hands.”

“I full heartedly trust that you’ll do some good, whatever the outcome may be. As for fixing us, I hope you can, but depending on what happens we’ll just have to wait and see.” She sighed, “If you want my opinion on it, I think that we both should have waited longer to get married. It was right after James and Lily got married, but we aren’t and never will be them. We both had a lot of growing up to do, so I would take it slowly. Communicate your wants and needs in the relationship and in the end it may not even be us together. But I know you, Siri, don’t let this get in the way of your entire life. The most important part is that you tell James and Lily about Peter.”  

She glanced back up the school grounds where students could start to be seen leaving their classes. “You better get back to the castle, Sirius. McGonagall is going to come for your arse and this time the boys aren’t going to be able to cover for you.”

“If they knew where I was, darling, I don’t even think they’d believe me.” Sirius chuckled.

Y/N nodded in agreement and pulled Sirius into a tight hug. “You can do this, sweetheart, and even if you can’t, it will not stop me from loving you any less. Maybe the future wasn’t meant to be changed, but regardless of whether that is true or not, I know that you will try your hardest, Sirius. Just try not to die, okay?”

The boy was still clutching onto her tightly, his tears soaking her rose-colored blouse. “I’ll do my best, darling.”

With one last kiss on the forehead, she smiled at him. “I know you will, Siri.” 

-

Y/N’s arse hit the floor once again, her spine cracking once again. “What’s the year?” She yelled out, reaching for the walls of the black family room. 

But it wasn’t there. Upon opening her eyes, she saw James, Lily, and Sirius sitting at a wooden table in her old white cottage. A nice tea set, her grandmother’s as she realized later, sat in the center, along with a large stack of letters. “Y/N, what the bloody hell happened to you, I’ve been worried sick!” 

Her red-headed best friend scurried over to her, brushing invisible dirt off her shoulders and pulling her up abruptly. James fixed the glasses on his nose, cleaning them off with his striped jumper. “You look a little disheveled right now, Y/N, what ran you over?” 

“You know who she reminds me of right now, Jamie? That crazy witch friend of Dumbledore’s that made her way onto campus back in seventh year.” Lily giggled as she hugged Y/N.

“Merlin’s beard, you’re right!” James walked over to the woman of the hour, ruffling her hair with a smirk on his face. “If you were about twenty years older I’d have no trouble believing you were the same person.”

While Lily and James recalled their memories from the strange woman all those years ago at Hogwarts, Sirius pulled Y/N aside, an arm wrapped around her waist. The warmth radiating from his body was nice, embracing her in a comfort she hadn’t felt in so long.

“I’m going to go ahead and believe that I did something right?” Sirius grabbed her hand, and only then did she notice the coolness of metal sitting on her left ring finger. There sat the single band of gold, a small ruby encased in its plating. She had once joked that diamonds were too overrated, and he went out and got her the most vibrant gem he could find, claiming that it was just like her. But regardless of its shape, size, or type of gem, it was there.

“Yeah, Siri,” Y/N replied with tears in her eyes, “you did good.” 

“Oi, Blacks, stop making out and get over here, we got a letter from Minnie!” James yelled, making both wives chuckle. “Harry’s gotten himself in detention for punching Malfoy again.”

“Oh, thank Merlin, the boy deserves a few more good hits.” Sirius laughed. 

“McGonagall still talks to us?” Y/N asked in amazement. “You’ve got to get me caught up.”

“Don’t worry, darling, we’ve got all the time in the world.” Sirius gently placed his lips onto hers, and for once in nearly twenty years, Y/N felt at peace. There were no more hasty warnings of the future, no psychotic old men coming after her family, no young girls rushing in to tell her how to fix her screwed up life. Cracked, pink lips moving against her own, his tongue delving into her mouth, and Y/N knew she was finally off the clock.

OBLIVIATE | D.M.  ABANDONED FIC OUTLINE

Hello~

I’ve had this fic for @fuckingdraco ‘s writing challenge outlined for almost a year now. Half of it is a skeleton; i have some scenes which are fully written out and others which are just first drafts and idea dumps. this is quite literally copied and pasted so good luck if you read it.

I never had the heart to completely delete it but never liked it enough to write it; so here is my 2.2k draft fo what would’ve been a series. 

If anyone decides to read it, be warned, it’s a mess. i just didnt want it to die in my notes so it’s having a life here, in my new section of my masterlist ‘fics that never saw the light of day’.

warnings: memory loss, fight scenes, gore, fighting

//

Being in a secret relationships had its ups and downs

You had to sneak around

But that just made the moments you were together so much more meaningful

You couldn’t brag about him to your friends

But the both of you were quite private people anyways, explaining your absences as studying in odd places

No one ever found out

It was just you and draco

The summer of 5th year was hard as he spent all of it in the south of France with his family

But it made coming back in 6th year so much more exciting

your fingers ached to touch him as you walked past his carriage

It was moments like this that you wish you could openly love him

But when your friends started gossiping about how Harry Potter thought he’d become a death eater, you were suddenly glad you weren’t linked to him publicly

That thought itself set a heavy weight of guilt on you

He came back in 6th year and he had changed

His kisses lost their spark

His eyes lost their light

He’d fuck you rough and hard, almost as if forgetting himself. Before making it up to you in the next instance

Slow love making that made you feel like you had just slept with an entirely different person

You followed him

You supposed you shouldn’t have

But he was skipping meals and you couldn’t exactly talk to his friends when they didn’t know you

You couldn’t confide in your friends as they wouldn’t understand

So you had no other choice

You followed him throughout the nights, and every time you would find him slipping into the room of requirement when he should’ve been slipping into bed with you

Once you had gauged what time he usually went and on what days you yourself went, 10 minutes before he was due

You watch as he fiddles around some ancient looking cupboard and you wonder why you’re jealous of a dead tree taking up dracos time

You watch as he sends things through, until finally it works for him

But its not happiness on his face nor relief

It looks like dread

He doesn’t look like he’s accomplished something, no there was no way

You watch as he takes off his tie, throwing it in the pile of robes and jumper

You watch as he rolled up the sleeves to his arms, the arms that had held you up more times than you could count

And you watch as the dark snaking lines of the dark mark are exposed on your lovers skin

His eyes whip round to see yours, instantly widening in fear

It isn’t until you try to walk towards him and he throws his hands up to stop you do you realise the shattered glass littered around you

He flicks his wand and you walk over, standing in front of him trying to figure out why

“How did you hide it from me for so long.”

“Simple charms, I was hoping you wouldn’t have to find out.”

More dialogue where he explains

“I don’t have a choice.”

“You always have a choice.”

Draco please

“I can’t, I had to take this on my skin because my father fucked up”

“If I, if I stop now, I cant save my mother”

“Draco please, we can find a way around this”

You kiss him

And it feels like you’ve both gone back to before 6th year

When times were simpler

When he loved you and you loved him and that was it

No other interruptions

“Oblivate”

PART 1

“Y/n?”

“I’m sorry, do I know you?”

“Draco Malfoy, we share some classes but we haven’t spoken before.”

“Oh, im sorry, of course. I’m really tired I dont usually forget peoples names I swear. I must’ve been so tired I wandered in, I apologise.”

“It’s okay, the doors over there.” You take that as his polite cue of asking you to leave

He offers a tight smile, one you remember from first year, one you remember seeing across the hall as he’s shut down by Harry Potter

Poor guy must be going through something

“Y/n”

you turn, you dont even hesitate. You dont know what it is but you feel as if you’ve known him all your life

You change and you see a gold ring dangling from a dainty gold chain. You ask your friends if they’ve seen it before

im forgetting so much these days

But you keep it on, it brings you an odd sense of comfort

You keep it tucked beneath your blouse, bringing it to you lips on occasion when youre anxious.

//

He had forgotten about his ring, the very ring you had clasped between your thumb and finger as you worked on your essay. How was he possibly supposed to get it from you

he’s well aware he’s staring but his mind is whirling

He needs that ring

“Draco, isn’t that your ring?”

He should’ve obligated himself, that might’ve been easier

“I’m sure it just looks similar.”

“Draco, we both know that’s the Malfoy famlily crest, I wondered why you stopped wearing it.”

“Wait did she steal it?”

misplaced it

She picked it up

He had to awkwardly walk over to pick it up

“That’s my ring.” You had told him all about how your friends hated him and how you had feigned indifference the entire time

He had to act the part

Youre flustered, eyes flicking between the ring and him, fingers clasping it tighter as if not wanting to let it go

He notices and his heart clenches at the sight

Remembering the night he gave it to you

*flash back*

“I’m so sorry, I must’ve picked it up by accident here.”

“Wait, how do you even know it’s his, prove it Malfoy.”

“My vaults could buy Hogwarts, why would I be stealing gold from a nobody?”

Your cheeks flare up and your friends glare at him but see his side

You struggle to unclasp it, and of course you fucking do because his stupid fucking ass charmed it so only he could take it off

he watches as you struggle with it, turning to a friend to help before you have 6 girls pulling at the very expensive chain on your neck

“For fucks sake youre going to damage it, let me.”

Your breath hitches as his surprisingly warm fingers brush your hair out of the way, fingers working quick to unclasp the necklace, the weight of it leaving your neck and you feel surprisingly empty

“Thank you.”

You watch as he goes, your fingers scratching over your neck, feeling something bubble in your throat

This was pathetic, you were so sad over something that was never yours in the first place

You spend the remainder of the time trying to figure out how you cam to be in possession of it in the first place

//

your name is written in beautiful cursive on a letter that you cannot help but love

You turn it over to see a beautiful wax seal on it, fingers trembling as you break it

The chain is yours.

d.m.

You tilt the envelope over into your hand to feel the familiar weight of the chain in your hand, clasping it around you neck in an instant

You look in the mirror but you dont recognise yourself

Your friends are surprised when you study with them

When you go back to your dorm room at a reasonable time

And you dont have a clue where it is they think you go

But how could you possibly explain to someone what you font remember

The chain is too light around you neck, its just not the same, it feels as if it’s chocking you rather than bringing you comfort

You start digging through your trunk and draws, looking for something to act as a pendant before you finally do.

Hidden at the back of one of your draws you find a little velvet box you dont remember stashing away. But then again, you dont seem to be remembering much these days.

Its a tiny little constellation of stars, charmed to sparkle and you heart wonders why you had never worn it before. It was a simple little charm but once hooked onto the necklace, you look at yourself in the mirror and finally feel as though a little part of you has returned.

PART 2 THE CONSTELLATION IS DRACO

6th and 7th years are a blur

A blur of horror

You dont really understand how life had changed so abruptly

You dont know how you end up fighting in a war at the age of just 18 but here you are

Draco stands with Hogwarts

And then his mother calls

You’ve seen him

Of course you have

You know what he is, know what his parents are

But you also know what he has done to make Hogwarts more bearable for you under the Carrows watch

The small things, diverging attention away from you and your friends

He wasn’t evil and some part of you knew that

You watch as he takes a shuddering breath and starts to walk

You watch as no one stops him

You watch as he loses more of his soul with each step towards mr no-nose

You dont know why you do it

You run

Your friends call your names, teachers joining in

They think youre joining the other side, they think youre fucked in the head, as they had since that incident in 6th year

But no, you were just missing something

you catch up to him pretty quickly, pulling him to a stop

“Ah, another to join my cause. Welcome young lady.”

“You know me. Im missing something but whenever I’m with you, whenever im holding this stupid constellation close to my heart, I feel at ease. Why”

he stares at you incredulously, and why wouldn’t he. Youre in the middle of a battlefield, Harry Potter has just been declared dead and Voldemort is less than a meter away

But you dont feel scared

And you feel stupid for not feeling scared

“It has felt like I dont even know who I am for the past 2 years, what did you do to me?”

You know everyones watching, you can hear the gasps on both sides as they think the worst of him

“I did what was necessary.” That was the first time he had spoken more than 2 words to you since he had gotten his necklace back that day in the library

“Draco, this is no time to be flirting. Come join me, bring her with you if you want.”

He tenses as voldy rests a boney hand on his shoulder, pulling him towards the other side, away from you

“If you won’t be joining us, we will use you an example of what will happen if you dont join us.”

You stare at him unfazed, fear was something you had gotten used to

Your fingers grip your wand in hand, running through all the spell harry had taught you in the da but its not enough

You are no match for voldy as he throws an unforgivable at you

You hear screams around you but all you hear is silence, as if the world had finally gone silent

//

Draco watched as the spell hit you directly in the chest. He had spent 2 years living with his actions all for it to have gone to naught in a single second

He watched as the light from his wand hits you

Before rebounding off you as if it hit a shield

There’s a flash of black and his mother is infront of him, wand out from deflecting the spell from bouncing back and hitting him

“Mother?”

“She’s important to you?”

“She gave him one of the fucking family heirlooms, either she’s important to him or he’s an idiot”

His parents were… bickering in the middle of a battle

voldy recollects himself but before he can talk neville speaks up “I have no idea what’s going on but-”

Draco drowns out the noise as he stares at you on the floor, youre covered in dust and in blood but youre alive

He hears screams as harry rolls from hatreds arms, he hears the cries from death eaters but all can see is you

“We’re switching sides now?”

“I mean he’s fairly distracted, he won’t have time to hunt us down, we owe it to our son.”

Fight scene

You remember everything

Fred Weasley teases the both of you, “we have a war to win, you can fuck later.”

He copy his lazy grin, a grin that lights you up, a grin that reminds you what’s left to fight for

You see the spell before he does

Youre in an arms reach of him but Draco cant reach you in time

You push Fred to the floor, putting yourself in the line of fire by default and draco has to watch you get hit all over again

“We need to talk about what exactly it is ive been wearing around my neck this entire time.”

“I think only my mother can answer that.”

[if you made it this far, send me an ask with the word ‘chicken’ and i’ll send you a cursed photo xx]

To me : a honest open letter to my self. deep breath and open up and express 

What do you know . You went back there again and all though you held on super tight you couldn’t keep him could you? Of course not. You’ve lost your self every-time chasing him and you’ve never been able to catch him.

I thought I wouldn’t survive this one. I thought honestly I was not going to make something of my self . I whole heartedly was ready to give up . What ever happened happened and I could care less it’ll never be as bad as losing you. And I truthfully connived my self that my happiness only lied in your arms.

It took me so long to cry . Once I got back Colorado the reality of my new home, it was such a blur . For a while I pretended you died. To some how help my heart forget you. And thats all I wanted was to forget you. I deleted every picture and every single video .I blocked you on everything I could think of that youd have access to talking to me through . And for what . Just to black out once a week and tell you how much  I miss you and that I love you . I drank my self silly . I mean every event every party every outing I had to be there I had to be anywhere but in reality . Because reality meant no you. It meant what once was and will never be again,, reality meant excepting my feelings. And I wanted so badly to be tough and strong. I’ve gotten my heart shattered a million times by you , you’d think I would get easier . It didnt it was worse . I was so fully invested in you that life didnt exist with out you in it . I didnt know what that felt like anymore . I was so wrapped up In you so blind to reality . Loving you meant losing my self . I lost my self 4 times a year for 5 years trying to keep your heart. I broke my own heart letting you back in to my life so many times . I knew better . But the love I had for you was so much stronger . I couldn’t stay away . I also revolved my entire world around you , so when you where gone I felt so literally like the world was ending . I lost my whole life . I realize now thats not healthy . You have to always prioritize your health and well being before anyone . You have to love you before you love anyone. So wed break up id self destruct then Id put all my pieces back together the ones you broke. Id fix my self and I would get back on track I was moving on I was happy then just like that . One phone call at 10pm where you clearly to drunk to remember the conversation id be on a plane. Drop my job my home my family My friends … quite literally everything just to be with you . Just to love you. All I ever did in this world was so unconditionally love you. I thought I could hate you I did for a while . But I dont anymore . You where apart of my journey and it almost killed losing you but it was supposed to happen . It was part of the plan that god has for me. You coming int o my life brought so much love and bond that ill never feel with anyone else . I will never love someone the way I let my self love you. And when the lesson has finally been learned only then I can move forward to the next chapter. And your purpose in my life was love and lots of lessons and lots of growing . You think god doest hear your heart crying you think he gave up on you ya know , but he never did. In the end you’ll see there was such bigger picture. 5 years I spent going back to you and leaving you. Why did I always go back ? Because loved you but I clearly wasn’t seeing what god prepared for me. He wouldn’t believe his lessons or fallow his guidance so he kept bring ing me back to you so I could relearn and remember why I left and well you might be my soulmate your not meant to be in my story forever . Only a couple chapters . And once you’ve served your purpose to my life that god wants me to have experienced and learned I will be able to move forward. I first must let you go . And I finally am starting to. I got so unhealthy and so sad and so stuck and caused so many health problems to my body . So much that was almost to much to prepare. But I made a choice one day . I chose my self , and not you. I chose to love me and not love you anymore. I commented intently to my family and I mean really gave it my all. I learned that no matter what my parents wouldn’t never leave mom behind .and im going to everything in my power to be a good girl to them and build our love and our relationship . And I think that was gods purpose all along. You cant keep whats not for you . And I didnt understand that when we parted ways. I accept that now . And I know as I continue to stay on the right path god has such beauty waiting ahead for me… look how much I loved you and all I did for you imagine how much I will love the right man. I did alot. Every time we break up I have to fix my self . But I know now its all apart of the journey . All those trials with you just made me stronger it made me braver it made me wiser and it made men grateful for the good ones.  You breaking my heart was one of the best things to happen to me in the end. Because I never would stopped loving you I never would have left you behind. I would have always been your biggest fan and continued to love you till I ended up hating my self. You have the courage to set me free was the kindest thing you ever did for me. At the time I didnt get it but who I am now and what I ve accomplished for my self and how when you try really hard to be better and I mean really hard things kind of fall in to place. God smiles and says okay you deserve this you’ve learned you’ve grown . I manaaged to accomplish that goal of being close to my family . We are so close and we love trust and respect eachother so much . Our bond is very very strong . I managed to get my self too a doctor , I found out I complete sabotaged my health . And oh ya I have 14 allergies !!!!  And some of the effects of those allergies after time has caused a harmful build up to where I was 3 years away form being diabetic , my thyroid completely stopped working . Amplifying my anxiety and my depression . The last month. I was in az i would get sick a lot . Id eat something and get sick . The problem was I was so fuxking drunk all the time I didnt ever thing anything of it. I’ve destroyed my guy and its a blessing that wildly and randomly this doctor asked if she could test me . And we found a lot of issues and also got a lot of answers to a lot of my health issues. Im starting treatment for that . Ill be injecting my self every other day with medicine to help my body repair the damages I have done and it will also help fight allergic reaction and build immunity so this doesnt happen again . I also !!! Am taking my meds again . Different ones but im glad I chose to take this chance on them again . I figured if im going to  put my health and happiness first I dotn need to be drinking and If im not drinking a lot fo stuff is going to come to the surface and I don know how well ill be able to handle that reality. I also like I said thought. Was going to kill my self. I was so heartbroken so so so sad. I knew I needed help and I reached out and got. Now im happy and stable and I get out of bed and I have energy and im so present and to active. I work out everyday . I eat healthy and I lost some weight . My highest weigh t was 168 before our florida trip I got down to 147 , when worked for Linx I was 145 then after being with tj again my mental health went hay wire and I lost my self again . Completely lost. And when I got back to co I was 153 pounds …. I would shift from 145 to 147 … then I just stopped worrying about it and started doing something about it. I channeled all my sadness in to exercise . Im sad go work out im bored go work out im happy hey go work out get that good flow !!  Your angry you miss him what ever it was I worked out then it became all I could focus on cus I learned to love it so Much . I took on running again I put in the work . Things finally where falling into place . I was getting my self back and this time it was better then ever . Better then ever before . I unlocked this door and its been so beautiful. I one day weighed my self just to see assuming id be 145 I was 137 !!!! Wow !!! A week later I was 135 and today I am 133!!!!! Its so cool and feels so good to not be depressed not feel pretty in my clothes. And iliv Amy self. So much . I hope I start working at hooters soon and continue to have a great life. I finally got approved for unemployment and ally back pay and also and extra 13 weeks after mine runs out. Things are just happening . I wasn’t going to get any hadn’t outs . But I was at the bottom thats for sure and you know who was there ? Not tj not the guy you literally did everything for no not him . My mom and my step dad and my brother . They took me in . And it was hard and uncomfterable , but I just stopped going out stopped drinking as much . And did things for them no matter if they where mad at me or if it was awkward.i committed to being good fo them . And I knew it would take time . But little by little ive managed to accomplish all my goals . When I used to be the queen of quitting. I cant wait to see even more of what god has in store for me. And who I become . My skins cleaning up my body is losing weight I more active im healthy and im very in touch with my desires and my well being . I care and love and respect my self so so much. Its like a huge spiritual awakening. I love being alone . I dont feel like alone deserves me right now to be honest .Its gong to take a lot for me to love again but its okay . Not everyone deserves that form me anyway. I worked so hard to me this . To be who I am right now and I won’t let anyone take that away form me. You cause harm to my heart my well being just by !! If you disappoint me disrespect me or hurt me its done . You lost you dot meet my needs your not benefiting and there’s to many many and women on this planet . Ill never waist my time on the wrong one . Ever again. I respect my self to much to put someone over me! And I stand by that now and forever!!!  The new be is bette then ever and its gong to take a hell of a person to change my relationship status . And that cool im honestly not even interested . I dont care to date or hang out or hook up or even have sexual contact with anyone . Im so content with me myself and this beautiful transition im goin through I just want to focus on me and my family and my health. Because this is what its all about. This is what living is. this is life. This is beauty . This is whats important. I feel like im living . And im happy and im only going to get better and better. Thank you god for this life and thank you for giving me the strength to turn the page and start a new chapter on life. I fully trust you and the processs. And that brings me back to “god will never leave you behind” I needed to learn all those things that all may mistakes have taught me . And god has a way of constantly bringing things back Into your life if it has not yet served its purpose or taught you what you needed to learn.  I see that now. Positive mind set is very powerful . Loving your self is amazing and living through god is the best thing you can do . I will always you tj and I will always in some way wish there was a me and you forever .but I cant ever betray my self like that again. That door is officially closed.  See I thought my life was over when you said our relationship was over. But really it had just begun. Everything happened for a reason exactly how its meant to happen . Losing you meant I could finally find my self. It just lit up the path .  God bless <3 no angry  im happy and im I accept this and I forgive my self and you . Life is so Beautiful .

Some one very wise once said … -Life is not about how much you hurt its about how much your willing to suffer. ~VP

Im not willing to suffer any longer.  Except it feel it and then forgive and move forward.

HI! Me again! Hope you're doing well and thanks again for writing! Also CONGRATS! You always bring a smile to my day with your writing (I swear I've re-read so many of your fics it's not even funny). I was wondering if you have an opinion on which Disney characters can the Star Wars characters fit into?

Hi!!!! Thank you first of all :3 I’m glad the fics bring you happiness and I’d love to hear which one is your favorite to re read (Just bc Im a curious person!!

Aaaaand, I put together SOME Disney headcanons below. This is by no means comprehensive (I didn’t do SWPT or the OT and only stuck with the SWST). If people want, I can make some Prequel/OT Disney ideas too!! For this first set, I did the sequel trio.

I can see other characters/pairings for the trio; I just started with some really clear comparisons!! (I also used TFA and the novelizations as my inspiration bc their characterizations were much clearer there)

For aesthetic and personality reasons, I see Poe Dameron as Prince Eric!

Handsome? Check. Trusty, adorable sidekick? Check.

Absolute trust in others’ goodness? Check. Kind, loyal, and gets into trouble a lot? Check! Saved by a good looking/mysterious stranger who is then (briefly) separated from him, a stranger who he has strong romantic vibes with? CHECK!

And then, for Rey and Finn, may I present: Rapunzel and Eugene/Flynn!

They take turns saving each other; one is ACTUALLY a lost princess (and Flynn/Eugene is actually a prince if you get into the extra media around Tangled and I’ve always believed Finn needed more of a backstory so I always headcanon him as the son of someone powerful who the FO kidnapped!).

Finn lies about his background upon meeting Rey (much like Flynn tries to hide “Eugene” and play a hero) but he does so for good reason and Rey, like Rapunzel, doesn’t blink and only asks that he stay with her to complete “the mission” (seeing the lights v saving the info stored on BB). Rapunzel, like Rey, canonically adores Finn — and like Rapunzel, can pack a surprising punch.

Rey = trapped on Jakku to hide who she is and her power / Rapunzel = trapped in the tower to hide who she is and her power

Finn = a hero who makes good choices and comes to terms with who he is and gets a “new dream” (family/love with Rey and not mere survival) / Flynn = exact same story arc

(Also I will die with the headcanon that when Rey kissed Finn goodbye she subconsciously healed him a little bit in the Force by loving him purely and giving some of her Life force to him because Rapunzel was the flower and Rapunzel healed Eugene because she loved him so much okay okay I’m upsetting myself)

((Also why didn’t we get more of the TFA dynamic and bonding in TLJ? I think that’s what I’ll always remain most upset about besides the sidelining of Finn and additionally Poe’s character depth to serve .... someone else’s storyline....))

AAAAND here’s one last Disney comparison!

No, I will not be taking notes on this pairing at this time. Ohana means family.

Marie Watches Amok Time, sober but emo

(yes, there are spoilers. also it gets long.)

Holy shit the soup scene wasn’t exaggerated

this poor man. hormones are the mcfucking worst amirite

he’s trying so hard not to say why. this is hilarious but i also feel so bad for him

“I need... rest” fjslfjdifjdjdjdjdkd

Babe what is in your hand. Is that a fucking knife

SPOCK NO. BABY NO. PUT DOWN THE KNIFE HONEY

okay I have a question. why doesn’t starfleet know about this. like it’s a part of Vulcan biology. it’s a necessity. they should know. but yes yes i know, i can hear my brother’s voice even now telling me “shut up, star trek isn’t supposed to make sense”

Wow Kirk was really thinking of being late for him huh. before even knowing. we’re all idiots in love

I’m fucking dying the way they’re building up the suspense

oh. oh baby. baby. honey no. darling. shit. fuck. oh my gosh i feel for him so hard rn

wow bones really does drop the mean-to-spock act the second he’s in trouble huh

THE HAND QUAKING THING I’M SO SAD

Kirk and Bones, right now: “YOU COULD HAVE TOLD US YOU WERE GOING TO DIE, MAN. WHAT THE FUCK.”

wow i knew what brand of angst this was going to bring me but for real. ow.

imagine being a vulcan parent having to give The Talk™️. those poor people. Vulcans are like the Irish having no word for menstruation

“biology.” this whole scene is so damn awkward im dying

This poor man

KIRK’S FACE WHEN ASKED HOW VULCANS CHOOSE MATES REALLY IS LIKE THAT

The person who wrote this was high. That’s the only explanation for this galaxy brain take right here

Imagine being Kirk right now and trying to be sensitive but also hearing this information for the first time

oh wow im emo

watching this as a sex-repulsed asexual really makes it hit different

Sulu and Chekhov are amazing

“Leave me alone. LEAVE ME ALONE” wow. mood.

Send Spock in a shuttle? But again, “not supposed to make sense”

Awww there goes Kirk being Kirk. Also I can’t help but feel “isn’t that worth a career” has undertones of a callback fo Menagerie

Chapel. Sweetie. I’m sorry but this crush you have will not go well for you. And if it does, it still won’t be the way you want. Go kiss Uhura, you’ll feel better

Spock has so many weapons in his room. I love it.

We haven’t even made it to Vulcan yet

You know something’s wrong with Spock when he compliments Bones

Wow this is so sad and yet so soft

🥺🥺”best friends”😭😭

THERE SHE IS. THE MYTH. THE LEGEND. THE LESBIAN. T’PRING.

“She is my wife” the WAY bones just LOOKS at Kirk I’m ded hahaha

If I were a Vulcan I would accept death that’s it that’s facts

Once again, Kirk has done his Vulcan research

Wow there is so much soft dialogue in this episode oh my gosh I’m dying

I know I’ve already said this but I feel so. bad. for him right now. I put off watching this episode bc I knew it was gonna make me emo. I’m still not sure watching it now was the right choice. I’m doing it for the lore

ohhhhh it’s getting worse am I gonna start crying I might I might start crying

The bells are killing the mood but honestly? I’m so glad the bells are here to kill the mood so I don’t start bawling rn

Wow kirk’s a nerd. He can fit so much love and history factz in him

They’re gonna fight with some weird shovels

BITCH. YOU COULDA TOLD HIM IT WAS TO THE DEATH EARLIER. LIKE WHEN SPOCK WAS ACTIVELY BEGGING YOU TO, FOR INSTANCE

oh here we go. the horniest fight to the death in history

Bones if you could compensate that easily why DIDN’T YOU DO THAT IN THE FIRST PLACE

now they fight with some jump ropes

oh shit. oh man. here it comes. time to get even more emo

McCoy you are taking this SO well. Are you fucking lying to us right now, or like??

That “wanting is better than having” quote is fucking insane in context. I’m emo

“I shall do neither” im. emotionally compromised

✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ:* JIM *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

OHHHH HOLY SHIT IM EMO

oh fuck oh shit oh gosh oh fuck im. i cant

HA. I KNEW IT. I KNEW IT BONES YOU CLEVER BASTARD

ohhhhh wow alright. so. i’ll be processing that for weeks.