Bouncing off my bi ryuji awakening post, im gonna add these tags from it: (separated to make it easier to read)
[#anyway. akira is the guy ever. and ryuji is exploding#‘i have died. badly’#i like thinking of akira like this; hes ryujis first exposure to nb ppl and gnc adjacent stuff#even if akira is p masc by most standards hes still got a bit of. aloofness. about his gender stuffs#ryuji is just really into the way akira carries himself#and it takes him a while to go oh. oh i think its cause i like this dude#um.#😳.
#also i wanted to clarify#but ryujis mom just doesnt know Who akira is in that picture#and in my head hes like. looking down at mona and petting him (while sitting)#(AND hes with ann and theyre both kind of a distance away from the camera)#so at a quick glance; hes just Some Girl#and even though shes wrong; it kicks off the mental chaos olympics in ryujis head#‘what hes not a girl’ to ‘where would she even get that from’ to ‘well akira said himself he didnt rlly care what ppl thought about it’#to ‘well. where DID she get that from?’ to lookin at what his homie does a little closer to ‘aw fuck. man.’#but i love that for him
#ALSO. RYU/GORO IN TAGS…..#but ryuji going oh my GOD oh my godddd 😨😓😓😓 when something clicks in his head about goro#his voice is so practiced and naturally softspoken and his public facing persona is very demure#and once he gets past the initial anger over goro being a pompous prick who shittalks about the thieves. hes like. god fucking dammit.#There Is A Pattern and A Type He Has and Its Killing Him To Realize it.#hes literally sitting in his room w his head in his hands]
Ryuji definitely finds Conventionally Attractive Girls pretty, but he realizes around postgame that he genuinely formed crushes on THREE people; Akira, Makoto, and Goro. And all three of them are people who carry themselves as a bit Soft and Delicate (akira and makoto w their personality and mannerisms, goro w his appearance) while also being deceptively strong. Yusuke WOULD fit into this but hes only strong in the metaverse. Also if u tried to argue that he still finds yusuke pretty, Ryuji would just say ‘yeah duh? Of course???’ and would not elaborate further.
I just think. Its cute 👉🏾👈🏾 Ryuji loves someone whos pretty and capable of knocking him flat on his ass lmao He LOVES a challenge and he likes that they can all challenge him in different ways.
Akira is way stronger than he looks; hes very toned and he used to be quite active before being shipped off to tokyo. And after fighting in the metaverse, hes gotten way better at using an enemies mass and momentum against them. Yeah he can properly knock someone down, but its way easier to let Ryuji charge him and use that momentum to sweep and pin. Which Ryuji remembers vividly for Weeks. Akira is not allowed to spar w him and Makoto for awhile after that.
Makoto is just strong as hell. But shes very defensive, and extremely patient. ‘Ill wait and see before I decide What to do’. Shes got good reaction timing and its hard to catch her offguard. Its very difficult to disorient her so oftentimes, his spars w her are more about endurance. And if he ASKS her to do so, she’ll actually fight him back. He never wins 😭 but she is very patient w him and she doesnt treat him like an idiot. She likes to give him tips and redirect his strengths to make up for his weaknesses and it makes him a bit warm in this chest
Spars w Goro are just fun. Theyre fun! Goro is way more aggressive and reckless than Makoto and Akira. He is looking for openings near constantly and Ryuji has to either keep up or tank hits. Its very. Engaging. For him. Sometimes he loses and Goro is giving him a look so smug, Ryuji wishes he could kick him in his fucking teeth (something he clearly couldnt do bc hes already been knocked flat on his ass). And sometimes he wins, and hes so shocked and HAPPY about it; he doesnt miss the way Goro looks away from him pouting like a brat (‘no fucking way are u POUTING man, what a sore loser 😭’). Goro and his uptight personality is thrown out the window completely and its so fun and refreshing to see. Hes tall and imposing w broad shoulders and toned arms and if Ryuji is staring, he finds himself immediately distracted when Goros cheerful, softspoken voice asks if hes willing to go another round.
I love it 👉🏾👈🏾 Ryujis got a complicated relationship w violence but it helps to have people he trusts engage with it in a way that doesnt make him feel like some brute. Theyre all kind of itching to beat the shit out of things for multiple reasons, but instead of taking that out on each other, they spend time training one another so that they can beat the shit out of OTHER things better. Its an efficient system 😊
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happy [late] birthday to the clevery guy !!!! <33
~ after being taken out by Tracey for some fun in the city for his big day , once returned home , the birthday boy himself gets some lovely stickers made just for him by Sketch , who had to get over her disdain of the color green for the day , just for her friend's sake . of course , Tony couldn't just not give his dear pal anything , instead baking the computer his cake for the special day , alongside other smaller gifts ;3
also extra digitaltime thing thing for the occasion teehee 💌
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i know nobody is online rn to read this but ;-; i gotta get it off my chest i love ken so much he means everything to me he's making me so happy and i've needed him so so so bad. he's brought me comfort when my ptsd has been so fucking unbearable and every time i'm having a crying fit over losing my tf f/os or every time i'm having a flashback i ALWAYS immediately IMMEDIATELY think about him rushing to my side, holding me and saying "hey hey it's okay, i'm here, i'm right here" and it's such a relief because i haven't been able to genuinely wholeheartedly believe any character would be willing to do that for me the entire time i've been struggling this year.
i've never gone so long without comfort from f/os, much less being triggered by the ones who used to comfort me the most. so to have barbie and ken right now is like the biggest wave of relief every single day when i wake up and the hyperfixation is still there. sometimes i will literally close my eyes and sigh in relief when i hear a song and my first thought is sebastian or ken or six or... whomever. i love being in love again. i NEED this. i love waking up and my first thought isn't my trauma most of the time now, it's ken. or it's six. or it's barbie. or it's harley. or it's officer k. or it's... yeah you get it. i needed these characters so fucking badly. every time i see a gifset and get excited over it, i feel a rush of gratitude bc self shipping has always been the glue holding me together. it doesn't feel as intense or strong as the SB musical or TF used to make me feel but i am not picky. not at all. i will take anything and i'm praying this lasts for at LEAST another few weeks please
i may not be at a sense of peace right now and i dont know when i ever will be, it could be years, but im so. so. so. so so so thankful to have these characters right now when i've needed someone so badly for so long. i hope ken knows how much i love him ;-; i hope barbie knows how much she has helped me, has saved me from one of my major triggers and has helped me to love and feel safe around the color pink again. i wish they could see me when i'm not so broken but i'm glad they're here even when i'm at my worst, i'm glad they still love me even when they deserve to see me in a much better light
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hiatus notice!
It's been a long time!! We are both well, but life has been collectively kicking both our asses a little bit, and the prospect of picking up and running the blog as consistently as we used to is feeling kind of daunting as a result. So we're going to step back for a little while and work on some other stuff while we clear our heads, and come back later ready to continue.
(how much later? unsure! But hopefully not long, we still both care a lot about the blog and its story. This isn't the last you'll see of it by a long shot :))
Additionally, both mods have both moved main blogs over the past few months- you can now find us instead at @alien-shmalien and @creaturelytracker.
Take care!!
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