What's like one big goal you're hoping to accomplish this year?

(PS I hope you don't get COVID! Even a "mild" case sucks, my sense of taste has yet to fully recover months later!)

Oh BOY that’s a complicated question hahahah. To try and put it simplistic as possible - figure out what I want to do with my life. Or like what path to take?

Hope you don’t mind me coming to you for a quick rant?

I love the community that livestreams etc have created, it’s so lovely sharing something with people from all over the world, but at the same time I really feel like it has created this insane expectation for every single show to be different and special.

Like when I was a teenager and started going to gigs, I didn’t know what they played the night before or what they would play the next day, I was just excited for what was happening in front of me. And realistically, if there’s 10,000 people in the arena us hardcore fans forget that probably 9,000 of those people aren’t familiar with the setlist and are surprised/excited by the whole thing.

Maybe it’s a weird thing to say, but I just felt when I was watching a stream tonight the comments were full of fans talking about which songs were the shittest. And then at the end there was loads of them complaining about how “boring” and “mid” the setlist was. Obviously you’ll enjoy some shows/sets more than others, but to watch them pour all their energy into putting on a brilliant show and then call it boring because they didn’t come up with any surprises is just kinda rude.

Most bands and artists keep the setlist exactly the same for an entire tour, why are we out here asking for something different every night of a seemingly never-ending tour??

Sorry to dump this on you, just didn’t know where else to take my rant 🤣

No I know exactly what you mean and I agree. I’ve been seeing that a lot in the comments of live streams. The last one that I watched there were a few people who were like so mad that they didn’t end with GYAT or whatever. I’m like ???? Okay but do you realize this is some peoples only show and they’re just happy they got to go at all? Like why are we making it weird.

It feels really bad too because I know matty talked about doing the show theatrically BECAUSE he didn’t want to just to a straight up “rock show.” But somehow through social media we’ve managed to turn even that into an expectation. So they had to amp it up even MORE and they did SATVB. And yet here we are people are still complaining. I think that’s why matty said that thing a while ago about no phones and shows haha. Idk if they’d actually stick with it but I understand the impulse. He feels like maybe he can’t quite get ahead of it. There are a lot of aspects to it too. The way that recording and spreading on tiktok all these things has ruined the surprise and spontaneous energy. It sucks. We should he grateful the boys have been so on board with the live streams and have tried to help us with it. Not complain!

Your ick for harry was very very weird and actually made me heavily dislike you. He’s not trying to imitate or be Freddie in anyway. He’s not even paying homage. He’s just a fan of him doing something he did bc he love him. And loads of artists do the same, no one is denying that was an iconic moment in history. He’s not trying to replicate it. If you really can’t understand why someone would do that then maybe you don’t get out much idk but that post was incredibly odd and painted you in an awful light.

THIS IS LONG...

I’m not saying he was trying to be Freddie? But maybe this is a good time to share that I’m a hugeee classic rock fan and geek. I heard my first Queen song at the age of 9 while my friend and I were playing on her driveway one summer. It was "Another One Bites the Dust". I remember the feeling in my chest when I first heard it. It was just warm and something clicked IDK what, but it altered my little 9yr old brain and I even asked my friend's dad, who was the one playing it while he worked in the garage, what that song was and I even remember the smile on his face when he said "Queen". LIKE THIS IS A CORE MEMORY FOR ME! As soon as I got regular access to a computer in the 8th grade (it was one at my mom’s work and explicitly to do homework) when I’d finish, you already know I was youtube-ing and googling and studying anything I could about classic rock. And I love it more than every other genre of music. It’s the genre that made me fall in love with music!

Like this music and those artist are indescribably special to me because despite only having about an hour of secret listening time a couple times a week, their music still managed to shape me and helped me find the courage to "Break Free" (haha) and find my own identity despite the really restrictive community I grew up in. And I don’t expect you to understand what it means to me personally and why I feel the way I do when I feel like people are watering down the significance and magic of moments so powerful and iconic such as the Live Aid call & response.

Like I know it’s not being done disrespectfully in any way, but to someone who literally idolizes rock music & history and Queen it just feels kind of second-rate for anyone else to do that, not just Harry. And I think we all know that "unoriginality" and anything short of spectacular is like total opposite of Harry. He empowers his audience in his own way all the time and had just as much charisma as those literal icons! He gets compared to so many rock icons all the time, but he has his own flare and way about things that just makes him so incredibly special! But the call & response will always be a Freddie Mercury staple to me and I cringe when anyone else does it, not just Harry. But I haven't responded as strongly to anyone else doing it as I did to Harry. Which is why it's my "ick" about him. LITERALLY THE ONLY THING HE'S EVER DONE THAT I CAN'T GET ON BOARD WITH LOL

And well, I think that’s the point of an “ick”? it’s something kind of stupid that just grinds your gears personally. And I’m not sure what you think “paying homage” means? But I'm pretty sure that's why Harry might be doing this with his large crowds. Because you're right, he's a fan of Queen as well and he's probably choosing to pay homage to Freddie through this mass-scale fan interaction. But that was a once-in-a-lifetime thing that Freddie shared with those fans during one of the most iconic shows in history! And maybe one day Harry will have his own “Live Aid moment” (I mean he’s well on his way to being an icon by his own merit) and do something history-making and iconic like that and people will copy him just like he's copying Freddie now. And we’ll be like “damn, no one comes close to how Harry Styles did that!” You know?

And again, this is my personal feelings and opinion! And the internet is a place to share those. So as crazy as you think I am for mine, I feel the same about your opinion on deciding to dislike a person over something so trivial (which this is, at the end of the day) LOL I respect your feelings though and I even acknowledged it on my page and gave you that platform to also have a voice! Even if it was to try and upset me or to just tell me that my opinion on an "ick" is stupid or whatever your purpose for speaking up was. If my "ick" post means you decided to unfollow that's cool with me! I hope you have a lovely weekend, friend! 🫶🏻

Skz as Boyfriends!

Paring~ SKZ x Reader

Genre~ informative lol

A/N~ yep it was requested! Enjoy 친구 <3

warnings? none. (idk mention of bed related things haha)

SKZ M☁List II Main M☁List

시장……..

✿ Bangchan

We all know this guy and you all have read enough of him I think, to know what imma say. (But for special purposes why not..)

This guy is really really serious about relationships and you are probably the one because he just can’t help loving everything about you.

The fact that he is yours even with all the responsibilities and work he has as a leader and idol is a miracle itself. Therefore consider yourself LUCKY to have the most caring and loving man anyone could have.

Dates- He likes movies hence movie nights and date to the theater are often. If not then he likes taking you to a sports event or the beach cause yeah. ( that vibesssssss you know? )

PDA = 3/10 why?, because as mentioned earlier he is responsible for many important things and he doesn’t want to have any misunderstandings about you and dislikes hate in general. That 30% I gave him was because he would only do PDA if really needed.

In Bed things? Umm not often actually but once in a while yes WHILE he would like it I’m sorry I mean LOVE it..

Con? Yep time! Sorry girl but that time you need, it’s hard for him to fulfill every time.

Cute extra info- Doesn’t mention it but secretly likes when you poke his dimple and say he’s cute.

✿ Minho

There are these majority conceptions, as I said majority but not all cause there are stays who know that he is a sweet guy deep deep down.😉

If you’re his s/o he will give every bit of him to you and expects the same for you. I would categorize him as a boyfriend wo acts like a mom lol. It maybe hard to digest that information but trust me this feeling I have from my gut I can say that he is also very caring. Although he might not say things like I will be there whenever you need me or even I miss you, care for you, but he doesn't need to say this anyway. As action speak more than words our Minho is the same.

Dates- He likes to balance it between what you like and what he likes as well. If you are a new couple he straight up asks what you prefer. Plus point he likes to take you to cat café if you like cats too.

PDA = 0.5/10 why? honestly speaking this guy literally hates to express his feelings. That .5 is literally him agreeing that he is yours and that's it. (when someone asks that is)

In Bed things? I personally think it depends on his mood and not yours. Yup. Somedays he wants you a lot and somedays he likes his space. I'm not saying he hates cuddling but more than that on days he is either tired or stressed he likes to keep that little limit to what happens next.

Con? Attention... you would literally take his cats away from him to get his attention.

Cute extra info- likes it when you call him and yourself Appa and Eomma to his cats.

✿ Changbin

Changbin being the puff/ strong guy(sorry that sounded disturbed lol) We all know how babied he likes to be.

Him as a boyfriend is just very natural, I mean from the way he takes you on a fancy date to even putting nail polish on your left hands. Everything is very genuine and he loves it. The Boyfriend to always apologize first.

I find him as someone to take attraction and the next step which is relationship very seriously. ( the person to be very calculative, it can beat Chan honestly..)Knowing that he is afraid to hurt people in any kind of way, to hurt you even as an accident breaks his heart.

Dates- Our Dwaekki loves taking you on dates with loads of food or snacks. A typical Korean restaurant or even food stalls, he loves seeing you eat than to be broken when you might have some kind of sickness due to eating problems.

PDA = 5/10 why? Because he likes your opinion. He is okay with either if you insist on a particular one but slightly leans on less public knowing. Holding hands and probably hugging you wouldn't be a huge problem for him.

In Bed things? he loves it anytime honestly... if he is horney he is getting what he wants and when you are same goes to you.. you'll get what you want..

Cons? Too much aegyo which makes you do things you don’t necessarily want to. (Stay blessed)

Cute extra info- Praise him! (x100) loves it when you say things like " my boyfriend is so strong.." or even " those arms mmm..."

✿ Hyunjin

I mean do I need to say how into he is with this??? Damn this man is the most prepared man a girl could have. The type to know everything about relationships... from trending couple fashion to even special not important but cute couple events..( that he probably found randomly scrolling through google)

He knows your anniversary, birthday, your moms birthday, dads and basically your whole family knows him too. He also keeps track of your monthly cycle too cause he likes being responsible for you..

He is the type to get jealous very easily BUT wont admit it when you ask. Likes to braid your hair while learning from YouTube.. Likes to buy you so many colorful cute hair accessories. (loves your hair..)

Dates- we all know this guy is fancy so he likes fancy dates but he can also be the complete opposite.. Fancy~ maybe to a art restaurant or even on a fancy boat cause why not.. Normally though~ likes to take you to an art museum or at night to take you on the roof for star gazing..

PDA = 2/10 why? I've probably given hints on my fictions with Hyunjin about this in particular. He prefers keeping this in private and that 20% is with his members (barely)

In Bed things? This guy couldn’t be more romantic lol. Loves being prepared for this buys every thing you both need… and yeah loves it.

Cons? He buys Kammi more hair clips than you sorry….

Cute extra info- likes when you get mad when he cut his hair lol. I apologize to all the stays I know he is cute every time but that long hair just hits different….

✿ Jisung

The craziest boyfriend you could have and will only have. You would low key love your relationship with this man I’m telling ya…

You two would have so much fun like toddlers. He is honestly the cutest, funniest, talented etc.. man you get all in one.. ahaha..

Likes to buy you the most stupid things that actually works for a daily living..( that thing he bought to watch on his phone while laying down 😵)

likes to joke around and talk to you a lot.. gurll listen to him he loves it. He likes to value your problems as well so listens to you too.

Dates- likes to watch anime so you two usually have this anime night cuddle sessions but if he were to plan something outside he would prefer to take you to the amusement part lol.

PDA = 8/10 why? honestly he likes showing you off cause he is fond of you. Basically doesn't care what others think... his parents know you, members, friends outside the group, and stays know you exist lol.. 20% i kept for a reason because he doesn't like it when things get out of handle so he wont do anything to the extent..

In bed things? yes he likes it but that turns up into a tickle fight or even a complete cringe but cute moment..

Cons? He might be very sensitive leading to him being upset and you having to apologize...

Cute extra info- loves it when you kiss his cheeks or just play with them in general..

✿ Felix

I had to bring this up at some point lol.. stays probably know the video where he says his clothes are boyfriend material lol...and yes i agree hands down!

A boyfriend material in his own way ahaha.. i mean we all know he loves to be cared for and loved. That Bangchan! spoiled little youngbok.. i personally feel or think two ways. Either he likes being cared for by you or he takes care for you since now he gets to be the older one..

Felix likes speaking in English so if you know English he would speak both languages as well. Likes to give you blowjobs cause he fell in love with you lol..

Dates- Shopping malls, window shopping, UNO on a picnic lol all these are his favs and so are yours .. Personally speaking he likes to take you to places where he can take lots of pictures of you..

PDA = 4/10 why? I don't know haha yup its just a feeling where I'm in between of two opposite thoughts.. I fell like he shows you to his members and family but not more than that.. (Olivia is most likely to love you)

In bed things? Likes being pampered and loves it when you lead.. happens pretty often actually..

Cons? yes! he like being touchy and so do you but he does it too much which beats ya.. and jealous really easily! and he lets you know that..

cute extra info- compliment him on his freckles and he will blush literally a tomato 🍅..

✿ Seungmin

Sweet really sweet.. he is the typical Korean boyfriend you'll get haha even better than that.

He just likes to talk to you or even look at you all day and keep that puppy smile on him.. The type to sing you a song to sleep or whenever you ask him to. likes to hear you sing too.. attempts to make you laugh but ends up, giving up.

He likes kissing your eyes when they are closed.. or when you just fell asleep after the song likes to give your eyes quick pecks..

Dates- He likes walks and that's why you go on evening walks and return when it's dark.. likes holding your hands. He likes grocery shopping with you, takes you to the rooftop to talk about life and its shitty problems.. Basically effortless things that make your relationship happy for what it is.

PDA = 1/10 why? I mean do I need to tell you this? he is like Minho but just a little bit more obvious.. Prefers to express his love when you two are alone..(that's it)

In bed things? umm yes but no.. i mean he gives in to your begs but I feel like Seungmin is just too into cute cuddling and these things are only when he is very desperate ..

Cons? not much but maybe ignoring you when you ask if he can buy you ice Cream for the fifty-sixth time..(but gives in anyway)

Cute extra info- He likes when he sees you in his clothes.. but doesn't say it and acts like he doesn't..

✿ Jeongin

Baby, baby, Baby..... he is our baby boyyyy but his savage ass towards his Hyungs just breaks it all hahaha…

Jk he is actually really cute, caring, sweet and likes to be protective. It may not suit him but yes he likes scolding people if done wrong to you..

You might be older or younger honestly he doesn’t care.. he is very respectful to you either way. He loves you and is very shy too which you find cute.

Dates- Asks you for your opinion or his Hyungs. He still is very inexperienced so he doesn’t know but sometimes likes it when you two spend time on the swings of some random park with fruit juice 🧃..

PDA = 0/10 why? Cause no no no no not even to his members haha he is just too shy and likes to keep his relationship in its own boundaries.

In bed things? Nope please! I’m sorry stays but I just can’t with Jeongin… (no further details he is just so precious to me)

Cons? He understands very late.. like you trying to say you want to cuddle, kiss etc.. without words he won’t get it. Just fucking be straight forward with our baby.

Cute extra info- honestly everything is cute about him so I can’t fit it here sorry… stays use your imagination here…

끝…

Hey!

I love Penelope Douglas for sure check her out! She writes some of the best smut tbh. I’m working my way through her devils night series right now-I’m on book 2. It’s good so far, definitely dark though. I’m interested to see how she goes about a redemption arc for the character Damon right now I don’t think he deserves one but I hear such good things about his book, Killswitch, but that’s book 3 so I will see how it goes. I definitely recommend Birthday Girl from her though I loved it and the couple from it are my favorite age gap could I’ve ever read. I find myself still re reading some of their best moments.

I am slightly embarrassed by Credence though so I hope it doesn’t bother you too much if you read it. Just so you know before going into it, it is about her and her step uncle/cousins. To be fair they are not blood related and very distance to the point she didn’t even know about them. But she does call him Uncle Jake during a sex scene, and the two others call her cousin during one too. There’s also a MMF scene with her two cousins. But on top of that there is a sexual assault scene (it does get stopped but the intent is there)-personally I wasn’t a fan of how she inwardly dealt with that scenario it felt like she was blaming herself for it instead of holding the other character accountable. Uncle Jake also does kiss her when she is still 17. So if any of that makes you uncomfortable don’t read it.

I’m so happy you liked the atlas six as much as I did. I can’t believe we have to wait until next year for the sequel to see what happens. It’s too long!! I also liked Callum the least, I still appreciated his character though and what he brings to the story I just wasn’t a fan of his, probably because of his problems with Libby/Parisa. Plus his powers terrify me-as someone who likes to have full control of my emotions the fact that someone could just change everything scares me. I also loved Nico he is my typical character that I love the whole I’m an asshole but soft and caring for the people I love gets me every time. Parisa is my queen though I’m obsessed with her. Like I’m literally in love with her, I wish she was real so she could be with me instead. Not that she would because I’m broke have 0 magic or power to give to her, but still. But I have a thing for power hungry women so I was gone the second I met her. But anyway if she was real she could destroy me or do anything she wanted to me and I would say thank you. Reina I also love and agree she could destroy the whole planet and one day probably will. I just love how she is there and wants all that knowledge but also doesn’t give a fuck about anyone else. Tristan also grew on me I’m still not completely sure how much I like or don’t like him yet he gets annoying sometimes because he is constantly in his mind about his alliances but I also love how loyal and caring he is. Libby is my girl!! I also relate to her as well since I was an outcast and battled inadequacy and all that (you and I must have some stuff in common!) Out of all the characters I relate to her the most and am rooting for her so hard-also because the author made her from Pittsburgh and I’m also from the area so I felt personally attached. But Olivie just did an interview and said Libby is getting a corruption arc and I am so excited about it!!

Okay ships- so I will be honest and I think it’s an unpopular opinion but oh well-I am a nicolibby stan. They have every single dynamic that I love in a ship and they could potentially be my favorite book couple of all time if that is the road they are being taken. Honestly I was obsessed with them from their first interaction so i have it bad for them. Obviously I know they were not romantic in this book but the potential (at least for me) was there especially in some of their quotes in the end. I fully believe they are soulmates though-even the author said they were born on the same day and feel like their other half is missing in an interview once-whether that will be platonic soulmates or romantic soulmates I have no idea and I could see either happening. My heart will break if it is platonic but it’s okay I can just live in my own little head about their potential.

But I get the idea and also like both libbytristan and NicoGideon and could see those happening instead of nicolibby too. I wouldn’t say I would be mad about it either-I do like both just to me the potential of nicolibby works more for me! My only thing about libbytristan though is I’m not sure how much of their tension/feelings are real (like did any of it exist before Parisa put the idea of the other person in their thoughts to lead to all the feelings.)

Weirdly enough since they probably my least favorite characters I also adore Tristan and Callum together. Their dynamic just works for me.

And I love Parisa and Dalton too and I’m so interested in how that relationship pans out because they have some stuff to figure out. But they work well together and honestly they are just so sexy together so I’m down for it. Although I do ship myself with Parisa more than her and Dalton but I’m biased.

Honestly though all the ships are wide open though so I’m curious to see what ends up being endgame. But omg yes the twist I was not expecting it-I’m so excited for the rest of this trilogy!!!

In other news though I finished up the ravenhood series. I know you said you either read it or it was on your tbr. But god I loved it. That series broke me and then put back all the pieces. If you haven’t read it and want to feel both heartbreak and happiness I highly recommend it!

Oh and don’t apologize for babbling as you can tell I also babble!!

-ACOTAR anon

Hiiiii sweets!

I've been sifting through a bunch of summaries of Penelope Doulgas' work on Goodreads and there's a bunch of stuff there I think I'd enjoy. I'm all about good smut. I didn't realize she had that many books. I'm excited! Thanks so much for the rec! I love dark romances/erotica every now and again so I'm also going to have to dive into the Devil's Night series at some point.

Oh, and idk if you know about it/read it but a couple of my friends told me about the Crossfire series by Sylvia Day a while back. It's BDSM, like Fifty Shades, but supposedly loads better. I don't know if you're into that but I figured I'd just throw it out there anyway. The smut is supposed to be steamy. I haven't read it yet but I do have the first four novels on my Kindle (where they've been sitting, unread, for about 2 years now)...so that's something haha.

And please don't be embarrassed about Credence. Seriously, the most wonderful thing about reading is you can go wherever tf you want in your imagination. No one can stop you. There are no rules. No restrictions. You can be whomever or whatever you want to be for a while, morality notwithstanding. One of my favorite things about books is that I can experience the most bonkers, outlandish out-of-this-world stuff that I'd never dream of wanting/liking in real life. It's liberating!

Thank you for the trigger warnings, though. I appreciate that. None of them sound off-putting enough to keep me from reading it. (Tbh, I want to read it more now.) I've read loads of books where characters marry or have sex with their cousins or siblings *waves at ASOIAF, the Secret History* so it doesn't bother me. I've also read most of Lolita and all of My Dark Vanessa by Kate Russell, which both romanticize pedophilia in disturbing degrees, so it takes a lot to put me off. If curiosity could kill then I'd be long dead by now. Hell, sometimes I will purposely read things I know will upset me to my core. What can I say? I'm a weirdo. 🙃

I DON'T WANT TO WAIT A YEAR FOR BOOK 2 OF THE ATLAS SERIES, EITHER. AHHHHH. How am I going to make it that long? It seems so far away!

Callum is the most terrifying of them all right now, imo. I think that's why I disliked him the most. Like you, it shook me to my core to imagine someone like him being able to toy with my emotions. I have a tendency to detach, to keep my emotions pressed close to my chest so that I can't be manipulated or hurt, and the idea that someone could have power over them, over me in that way is...no freaking thank you! I would put as much space between him and me as possible. Most of the Atlas crew had the right idea there. He does bring a lot to the story, though, like you said. I have a feeling he's going to be one of those characters I "love to hate" as the series progress. I might even grow to "hate to love" him, idk. He's just such a shady bastard! And so judgmental/mean to the girls.

I'm with you on Parisa, by the way. She's the kind of conniving, ambitious siren of a woman I can get behind. She has a similar vibe as Katherine Pierce on TVD. I mean, there's nothing in her arsenal she won't use and I love how she weaponizes her beauty. It's delicius. She's unpredictable. Definitely the type of character who inspires "scared and aroused" energy any time she walks into a room. Like, she could choke you and instead of crying you'd just ask her to do it again...harder lol.

Reina has the same kind of "no fucks given" attitude I have because I genuinely don't care what people think of me, either. I'm just here to do my thing. Be nerdy. Learn. Whatever. And Nico is my fave for the same reason as you--the asshole who only has soft edges for those who matter to him. *heart eyes*

Omg, Libby is going to have a corrupted arc? AHHHHH. That's going to be amazing, I cannot stinking wait! I was sort of hoping she'd go dark so now that it's confirmed I'm even more pumped. Also, I think you and I have more in common than either of us realized. I'm from the Pittsburgh area, too! How wild is that? Maybe there's something in the water here and that's why, like Libby, we've both felt inadequate and like outcasts at different points in our lives? Olivie might be onto something here...🤔

The thing that's been so cool for me about this series so far is that there are a bunch of potential pairings I could get behind. And I kind of like that it's not clear cut right now. Most series I know who I want together or who will be together like halfway through book 1. I like that I don't know have firm preferences and am still open. That's novel. Not to mention fun!

I don't blame you for shipping Nicolibby so hard, though. They're definitely one of my top contenders for a romantic pairing. They have that enemies-to-lovers element with witty banter that I always gravitate toward. And you're right about Libby/Tristan. I don't know how much of their connection was manufactured because Parisa intervened, either. That'll be fun to puzzle out moving forward. And Callum/Tristan should NOT be a ship I like but they have a palpable something that I can't put my finger on. I've got my eye on them, for sure.

The Ravenhood series is still on my tbr. I'm so happy to hear you enjoyed it so much, though! It's rare to read something that just ticks all your boxes. The next time I'm the mood to binge a series I'm gonna have to pick that one up. :-D

I've been trying to clear out my backlog of ARCs lately. (Not possible because I'm getting more on the regular - as in constantly haha - but I'm trying.) I just finished Wish You Were Here by Jodi Picoult, which has a Sliding Doors premise that is set during the pandemic where the main character has a parallel life experience (one, where she's in the Galapagos Islands on vacation when the shutdown hits so she's stuck there with strangers, alone, not speaking the language; the other, where she's in Manhattan with her surgeon boyfriend and recovering from COVID). It's intense but so, SO good! Picoult is such a good writer. Anything I've read by her has been moving, with rounded and real characters. I haven't been disappointed yet. I so recommend her.

Oh, and if you're into nonfiction/biographies at all I finished The Splendid and the Vile by Erik Larson not long ago, which is about Winston Churchill as well as those around him, and it was fantastic! Read more like fiction. I loved it. I am no longer surprised it was on all the BEST lists for 2020.

MC reacts to The Brothers (+Undateables)

In a crop top ~ Yum

Due to the *NSFW undertones, I will NOT be writing any for Luke, obviously.

Sorry this took me ages haha i ran out of creativity for these. On that note, let’s jump straight in 😉

The Undateables

~

Simeon 😇

Similarly to Beel, will not see your request as anything unsavoury you cheeky thing, you

“What is a ... ‘cropped top’?”

Basically wears them anyway

Is used to showing a little skin, so would think nothing of it

After all, God intended Human Beings to be naked, so this is not weird

The only thing odd about it, is that you specifically requested it

He still wouldnt see it in that way tho lol

The one he’d wear wouldn’t surprise you, because it’s not too dissimilar to what he normally wears around RAD

Black, sleek and skin tight - sleeveless to reveal his perfectly sculpted shoulders and with a high neck - cerulean blue accents to match his eyes

Your jaw fell slack at how attractive it looked on him

His piercing blue eyes crinkled as he smiled, “I guess this one suits me, then?”

Oop - ah well, who cares if he knows your staring?

He’s an angel ffs - of course he looks amazing

“You...” you couldn’t seem to find the words to encompass what the mere sight of him did to you

His face would fall a moment, “is something wrong, MC?”

You’d flush, shaking your head with a nervous laugh, “No... well, God probably wouldn’t forgive me for thinking it but -“

You can’t bring yourself to finish that sentence

Fairly certain he was aware of where your thoughts were headed, his cheeks would tinge rouge

He’d play Innocent TM as not to blur the line or complicate things...

You’d make it ducking difficult though

Yes i said ducking, Simeon is an Angel he legally cannot say fuck

It’s just... the way you were ogling him, undressing him with your beautiful and captivating eyes... fjdlficjsn

His chest would tighten, breath caught and heart in his throat

He was well aware what that feeling was, his brows downturned at the thought

“Is something wrong, Simeon?”

He’d hold a hand up, gently but firm, “No, i’m alright, thank you.”

You can’t help but feel a little guilty... after all you did just have certain thoughts about an Angel

Seeing your crestfallen face, he’d immediately snap to - gently reaching for your hand with that crinkly eyes smile,

“Don’t look so glum, MC. Everything’s alright.”

He was simply radiant, you couldnt help but return that smile

Depending on what floats your boat, i’ll let you imagine what the outcome was

Solomon 🧙‍♂️

Hahah oh boy...

“Oh? And why would you want me to wear that?” ;) TEASE

Would give That Smirk TM

This could literally go one of two ways:

One, he wears a cute cropped T and says “Well, what were you expecting from me?” ;) TEEAASSEE

He knows God damn well what you were expecting lmao

OR

Quite literally wears some leather skin tight crop that shows off all his tatts, all his packs and muscles... like dayum haha

Either way you’re speechless

He is one cocky lil shit, he’d love it

“Finally i’ve drawn your attention from those brothers, have i?” “Wh-what?!” “;)”

Nosebleed

“I’d like to request you wear one too, it’s only fair after all.”

Whilst having you gently ensnared against a wall between his palms, with those eyes entrancing you to keep you there

You’d never seen him in that light so deeply than after your request

Your eyes trail his form once again, surprisingly more muscular than you’d anticipated from under the RAD uniform

You’d flush from under his gaze, not quite sure where to look, what to say -

“Cat got your tongue?” Ajsksknxdn

He’d need want to hear you say it.

“I - i didn’t realise you’d tease me about it.” You look away with rosy cheeks

His teasing smile would falter a moment, asking more seriously, “why would you ask me to wear a crop top?”

You’d find his gaze, tongue tied for an answer

You’d swallow from under his penetrating gaze that seemed more serious than before

“I...” why did you ask him again?

“I just... wanted to see it.” “‘It’? That’s not very specific.” Ahsksknsk LOL such a tease

You’d hate that he made you admit it, you forced through gritted teeth, “I wanted to see what you looked like in a crop, what more do you want me to say?”

His smirk tugging on his handsome lips again before warm breath carasses the shell of your ear, “I want to see what you look like too.”

Lmao #Exposed

Nosebleed 2.0

Barbatos 🕰

Yo, you would have some mad guts to request it when he’s working hahah

He would instantly flush and comment calmly how inappropriate your request is

Diavolo would laugh if he heard your request and his reponse from beside you both

But if you were alone with him, perhaps a little closer to him...

I stand by the fact i think ‘Barbietos’ is a Dark Horse TM

This man has a dark side lowkey yandere vibes maybe? Idk yet need to see more of him tbh

if you’re close and you ask, similarly to Solomon he’d smirk and tease

Barbatos is sarcastic but he wouldn’t snark you for this, especially with your blushing features

He’d utter your name, before finally mustering the strength to ask, “what kind of cropped top do you want me to wear?”

You’d have to be immensely private about it, ofc he can have a private life but he is literally at the service of the Prince of that realm

Not just the crop top request etc, the entire relationship would be kept under radar for a long time

I can see his crop being loose, the satin like material draped tastefully from his shoulders and revealing his midriff

The emerald green colour so dark you thought it was black until you saw it’s sheen under the light

You might have already seen his body at this point but you can’t help absorbing his features like a sponge

His abdominal muscles, his strong shoulders... he was also much stronger than he looked under a uniform

He’d stand before you, as you rise to your knees upon his sheets, eye level with his chest

“Tonight, I could serve you for a change.”

He’s probably not as quiet as we think

Diavolo 👑

If Lucifer ever heard about your request, you’ll be out of the Devildom faster than you can say Demonus

You’d have to be incredibly brave and or stupid to even ask in the first place...

However, Diavolo wouldn’t actually mind, “come now Lucifer! It’s a fashion trend in their realm! It sounds fun!” With That Laugh TM

Diavolo is actually pretty lonely, loads of people feel they can’t approach him so he’d acc happy that you felt you could ask that of him

If you were closer than that, you’d be visiting the palace upon his request

If and when you’re alone, you’d ask him to wear one

He still wouldn’t initially see it in that way, his own demon form is shirtless

“I’d like to try one! Have you any ideas in mind?”

After understanding the nature of your request, something will flash passed in those golden irises

“I see... so this garment will grant you a certain gratification?” BLUSH

It’s not secret that Diavolo is the biggest demon, he is one big muscle machine

You’d struggle to find a crop that fit him ngl

he’d have one custom made from your design idea

You’d want him in a maroon or black one, specked with elements of gold to match his eyes

It would be snug due to his size, seeing every inch of muscle from underneath like a marble sculputre

There was something so.. awe inspiringly beautiful about it your breath stopped short

Any prior thought was lost as you silently trace the edges of him with your eyes

“Do you like it?” :) - well... duh haha

“What are you doing still standing over there?”

All would fall silent save for faint breaths and the steady beating of your hearts as you trace the crop’s fabric with your fingertips

He’s surprisingly soften as he’d watch you doing so

He’d wrap his strong arms around you, gentle fingertips stroking your hair

he’d murmur “I’m pleased you like it.”

Soft kisses planted on your forehead and you’re a goner - putty in his arms

“Might I ask... would you wear one?”

You bloody well would lmao

Might edit these later and need to link to the brothers one but hey ho, enjoy! ✨

(spoilers for LC & LoR sorta) ayo I found this blog a while ago and wanted to thank u for filling the void of lc content in English it really is dope. I have loads of hcs too but most of them revolve around what the abnormalities were like when they were still human, and it’s nice to see a lot of their humanness still being retained even as they are abnormalities now :,)

Aaaaaaaa thank u thank u!!!!

I really love the monsters in this game (and Ruina made me like the sephirah and Angela more, plus Roland I care he a lot) from the designs to the way they can be interacted with. Only problem is I wish they got more focus in the actual story and more interactions but :,) oh well.

I wanna see cool monsters do cool things (which Is probably why i enjoyed wonderlab so much hah)

But!!! Im glad i can help the eng lc community! Most of the stuff I find for the game is either in Korean (to be expected) or in Japanese so I hafta take in context clues if there is pictures and stuff.

I’m also happy that me humanizing them a bit more than shown canonically is accepted by so many people :,D. I always worry someones gonna get upset or smthn but like,,, i like horror a lot too but something about seeing scary monsters being dumbasses or wholesome just sparks joy.

Also also!!! I also have some pre corp hcs for when the abnos were humans but I haven’t shared a whole lot of them cus like,,, idk lets just say if I really wanted to, since the story is based off of a fairytale i could just slap a new design onto frei and he’d be a proper oc as long as i only use the backstory i made lmao. I’m scared that people will think I’m trying to woobify the dude but after absorbing so much of random versions of this fairytale i think im okay haha.

Sorry for this big resp i just care that people like my brain thoughts so thank you thank you

@dreamyjaems: “hi babycakes!! i loved your “target headcannons” and it was so enjoyable to read! i was having a rough night, so reading it brought a huge smile on my face 🥰 so if you don’t mind, could you do the “target” headcannons but with goshiki and atsumu! thank you very much and i hope you have a lovely day! i look forward to reading more things from you and good luck on your blog! 💓”

hi bb! ty for the kind words🥺 im glad it made your night <33 you’re my first request, so im kinda nervous😭

im not too familiar w/ goshiki and atsumu, so i’m sorry if they’re ooc :((( i really hope you like it tho!

going to target w/ their s/o

{hcs for goshiki and atsumu}

goshiki

“BABE!!! i’ll go get your favorite cereal brand for you!”

✰ would run all the way across the store just for your favorite type of cereal LMAO

✰ when he comes back PLS praise him 🥺

“goshiki you’re so sweet how did you know?”

✰ stands proudly, chest out and smiles ear to ear

“well..i always see you eating this type of cereal in the morning!”

✰ he would probably get really flustered from pda, so don’t do it unless you’re ready for an overheated baby

✰ pushes the cart for you the moment you guys enter target and would insist to push it until the very end of the trip

✰ IF you’re feeling a little mean today, your hand would “accidentally” intertwine with his on the handle bar

✰ goshiki.exe has stopped working

“u-um y/n what are you doing?”

✰ HIS WHOLE FACE TURNS SO RED POOR BABY

“nothing, i just want to push the cart with you” :)

✰ tries to loosen up a bit, but his heart would be pounding so much that it’s the only thing he could hear <\3

✰ still tries to suck it up and look like it’s not making him sweat at all (even though it is)

✰ he’ll get anything and everything for you

✰ no matter what height you are, goshiki would still want to grab the items on the highest shelf just to impress you. he’ll put it in the cart so proudly knowing how cool that was of him

✰ sometimes it’ll either leave him with a proud smirk or a face of defeat when you aren’t looking HABQAHBSAHS

“did you see that y/n!?”

“huh? what do you mean baby?”

✰ you’ll leave him stunned and kinda hurt tbh

✰ this won’t stop him from trying though!!!

✰ i feel like goshiki would also want to check out the sports section. his eyes would automatically land on the children sports gear and turn soft. he would get MAJOR baby fever from the sight of it and immediately turn to you about it

“BAB-“

“i know what you’re thinking goshiki and nows not the right time to talk about it” 

“BUT”

“goshiki -.-”

“yes ma’am!”

✰ salutes you cutely and that leaves you in a giggling mess. he loves to do dorky actions just to make you laugh and he succeeds every time🙈

✰ probably thinks about what ushijima gets from each aisle you guys pass through. even though you always remind him he doesn’t need to BE like him in order to beat him lmao

✰ 100% pays for everything. he flexed his money and bought $100+ worth of junk food

✰ practically broke afterwards, but doesn’t really care because it was spent on you🥺🥺

✰ going back to the car, he’ll put you in the cart too with the grocery bags like kuroo, but would do it to only show off how strong he is haha

“baby are you sure this is fine?!”

✰ HE’LL BE GOING SO FAST SOMEONE SLOW HIS ASS DOWN 

“DON’T WORRY MY LOVE THIS IS NOTHING”

✰ he of course would start to load the car for you. maybe roll up his sleeves just a tad for you to see his ya’know 👉💪😼

✰ you’d be so grateful to have this little bean like??? he’s so sweet :(

✰ you of course had to do something in return. before goshiki could even say a word out of his mouth, you connected his lips with yours for a light peck. his eyes would be WIDE open while receiving it omg

✰ goshiki: 👁💋👁

“thank you for everything today goshiki….i love you”

✰ AWH CRAP GOSHIKI STOPPED WORKING AGAIN

✰ the kiss made him blush 10x more than from inside the store and starts to muster up a sentence to try and say how he wants another one

“m-maybe we c-could do that a-again?”

✰ of couse you would give another one for the cutie. this time he actually lets it last for at least 5 secs before letting you go

“i love you too baby...always!!”

atsumu

✰ you being his first ever long term s/o, going out to target with his partner was a first for him. atsumu honestly just came because he had nothing else to do...or at least that’s what he told you

✰ atsumu is a man of physical contact, so expect A LOT of pda. he honestly doesn’t give a fuck😭 he’s THAT ballsy to try anything in public

✰ he would be the type to put his arm around your waist while in the midst of choosing between two snacks. this little punk would slowly start to trail his hand lower...and lower....and low-

✰*SMACK*

✰ you smacked his hand off before he could do anything perverted😭 boy would be sorta pissed at either the fact you didn’t let him do what he wanted to do or because you slapped his hand wayy too hard and its turning red now JANXNC

✰ although atsumu can be protective, you can’t be protected from his jabs of teases and pranks lmao

✰ he would purposely take an item out of the cart and put it on a random shelf until you’ll notice something is missing 

✰ when he sees you getting all riled up or show some sort of irritation he can’t help but admire how cute you look all mad. doesn’t try to show any expression though and hides it with a smirk

✰ 100% only does it to get a reaction outta you😭

✰ drags guides the cart to the toy section and checks to see if they have any cool action figures (idk why but i feel like he would collect those kinda stuff)

✰ turns out there’s only those science toys

✰ (kuroo?👀)

“why is there only fucking science shit”

“HUN there’s children next to us don’t say that”

✰ looks at the children and then back at you with a lazy smirk

“ffffffuuckkk” says it in slow-motion 

✰ AHAHAHAHAHSHXHCHH

✰ omg you would just roll your eyes at his immaturity and leave him there with the clueless children 😭😭

“awww come on princess don’t be like that, i'm just teasing”

✰ another eye roll came from your face at how stupid he is, but can’t hold back a small giggle as well

✰ ah how he loves that adorable giggle of yours

✰ the sole reason for this target trip was to look for furniture and it was the LAST stop you guys took from this whole time

✰ atsumu would straight up lounge on a couch even though it would say do not sit on it’s only for display

✰ AGAIN mans does not give a flying fuck he does what he wants😎

✰ if an employee tries to tell him to get off his reply would be:

“if i wanna buy it, my ass needs to approve”

“babe! i don’t think there’s anything here that’s nice we should look somewhere else”

“ahh seems like my princess and my ass doesn’t seem to approve this leather couch of yours we’ll be writing reviews on yelp”

✰ hey, his baby didn’t find what they wanted 🤷‍♀️

✰ rumor has it the employee’s jaw is dropped to the ground till this day lmao

✰ once you reach the check-out area and pay for the junks you got, you put the groceries into the cart and atsumu squishes your face to stop you 

“babe, we’ll find you a pretty couch in no time”

✰ not gonna lie you were kinda bummed from not finding anything

“i know just what to do to make you happy again”

✰ debby ryan smirks 🌚🌚

✰ he immediately lets go of your face and starts jogging towards the lines of carts to get one for himself.

“lets race!”

✰ your face immediately lit up from the request of a pisshead (who wouldn’t want to wipe that smirk off of that handsome face🙃)

✰ you two both started to race each other on carts towards the car and you won. he probably would say he made you win on purpose just because you were a bit pouty

✰ laughter filled the air from how THIS was his way of cheering you up. it was so cute for him to “lose” for you 

“babe you’re such a loser” 

✰ your lips suddenly met his cheek for a light peck

✰ you thought it didn’t really faze him until he asked you to slap both of his cheeks till they turned red

✰ the only reason he told you to do that was to hide the fact his cheeks were burning from that tiny peck LMAO

taglist: (i’ll add more in the future!🥺)

@deadontheinsidebut @kat-writes-haikyuu @lovetsuki

want to request hcs or a matchup? here are the rules!

its been a hot minute omg hi i got clapped my university again 😳😳😔😔😭😭😭 but hi clari!! hope you’re doing well!! i know you were sick a bit ago and idk if you still are, so i hope you’re being gentle w yourself! 🦋🦋💕💕💕💕

hehe if the relationship advice is still on the table...? if not, you can ignore this 100% and it’s fine!! um. the advice i wanted was. i got a boyfriend during this pandemic and we were talking over videocall and stuff and we’ve met up a few times, but i just. know that a lot of people are like “oh when this pandemic ends i feel like quarantine couples won’t last because others will be flirting with them and it’ll feel new and exciting and the temptation is too great” or things along those lines. and it’s like, probably my biggest relationship insecurity. is that i’m not gonna be enough or i’m not good enough. or that i’m too different face to face. i haven’t really told him yet, because he’s been busy and going through it too haha, but i know i will eventually i’m just kind of like. not sure how to think or feel. because obviously if he wanted to not be in a relationship with me, i would 100% respect that and he owes me no explanation. but. idk. yeah. sorry this was so long and convulated babe 😖😖

i know you’ve been with your boyfriend a while, but regardless i’m not expecting anything really in terms of advice other than your thoughts? only if you feel comfortable with sharing them ofc!!

anyway, hope your day/night is excellent and that you smiled and drank some water and saw some cool dabi fanart!! thank you for sharing your light and writing and energy with us!! i’m so grateful to exist at the same time as you ✨✨

- 🦦

OTTER hello ehehehe welcome back!! i am doing better, thank you!! <33

yes the relationship advice is still on the table!! aaah okay. first of all, stop caring what other people are saying about quarantine relationships/couples. i know it’s hard, and i totally understand why this is causing you anxiety, but i promise you they have no idea what they’re talking about, and this idea is not new. it’s the same old ‘oh, when your partner goes off to university it’ll all be so *new and shiny* and feel exciting and tempting’ etc etc etc, and it’s a total load of shit. because listen, if that happens, then the person you were with is an asshole who wasn’t serious about you in the first place. it doesn’t matter what the situation itself is, whether it’s going off to uni or the pandemic ending or this person going to a party full of new people etc etc etc--if they’re THAT easily swayed and that easily tempted, then they weren’t invested in your relationship in the first place. people who are invested in their relationship aren’t looking for others and aren’t that easily tempted--they’re HAPPY and content in their own relationship already and have no need or desire for any of that. the whole ‘out of quarantine’ thing is just a new spin they’re putting on something people have been saying for forever. AND, if that person IS that easily tempted, then the finer details (like whether it’s going off to uni or coming out of quarantine) don’t matter, because it would’ve happened either way. does that make sense?

not to mention idk what these people think everyone’s gonna be doing straight out of quarantine??? like are they expecting everyone to rush to clubs or other spots where you normally meet people??? why would someone in a relationship want to do that anyway? like where are they meeting these new people lmao??? most people, when quarantine finally lifts, are gonna be going to visit their FRIENDS and people they already know, like their partner!!! if anything, i’d think quarantine would make your reunion that much sweeter (i know you’ve said you met up a few times, but it will be different to finally be able to meet up once quarantine is over--think of all of the things you guys can finally do together, once everything calms and opens again!! it’s quite exciting!!).

you mentioned bringing it up to him eventually, and i think that’s the most important thing. communication is key in ANY relationship, regardless of the nature, as is honesty. it builds trust!!! but he isn’t a mind-reader, you know??? he isn’t going to know this is bothering you unless you bring it up to him, and i promise you you’ll feel so much better once you do <33 it’ll be nice to talk it through with him and get some reassurance. it’s also important to share your insecurities with one another, when/as you are ready to. no one is perfect, we all have flaws and insecurities!! it’s nice to share yours with a partner, even if it’s just to confide in someone.

at the end of the day, these people don’t know you or your relationship--try to keep this in mind. again, i completely understand why that would cause anxiety or doubt, and i also get the whole ‘being scared you aren’t good enough’ thing. and i’ll tell you something; i think MOST people have that fear at least once in their lives. for some, it’s a bit more prominent, and in that case i think there’s a deeper root to the problem (usually self-esteem, or depression, etc it’s very personal and unique to each individual of course). but my point is, usually when you find someone you really care about and you really admire, that thought runs through your mind. you go ‘oh, shit, am i good enough for this brilliant person?’. i did it, my best friend did it, my roommate did it; it happens to a LOT of people. but you have to realize that fuck yeah you are; you’re awesome and your partner is just as lucky to be with you as you are to be with them <333

i hope all of this makes sense ehehe and i hope it relieves at least a little bit of your anxiety--please feel free to ask anything else you need to or for clarification or whatever!! i care about you (as i care about all of my anons!) and i hate to hear that you’re feeling like this :((

thank you sweetpea, my day was nice!! i spent most of it writing, and then my boyfriend came to visit during the night and we lounged around watching naruto lmao. oh otter, the smile that last line brought to my face is just indescribable, thank you so very much for saying such a lovely thing, please know that i am grateful to exist at the same time as you, as well!!! <333333 please take care of yourself, friend, you deserve all of the love in the world!!

genshin anon! finally lol. i keep meaning to respond - tab has been open with your last response for two weeks now... lol. oh i put a lot of work into my weapons. especially if i use them a lot. oo the 20k+ is nice though! apparently i have hu tao built semi decently so when she gets a vaporize crit it goes quite well for me haha. yeah agree. and they have updates every 6 weeks. yeah not every update is the biggest thing ever but like... its okay. no need to rush. game development takes time.

hihihi lmao again no worries!

(2/5) oh oops I spend several hours a day on the game (when i have time). to be fair, i genuinely enjoy going into coop and finding lower ar people to help with bosses and world exploration and stuff. so i can spend a long time doing that. i know i appreciated the help when i was low. plus its fun to get to chat with others occasionally. oh yeah genshin def ripped off of botw very well lol. they took botw's complaints and went yeah i can fix that. but then made it gacha.

(3/5) i saw you say you have c6 noelle now lol. i am so so sorry ): you did get keqing though? was that on the banner? so are you guaranteed the banner character next beCAUSE ZHONGLI RERUN YES. oh yeah it was so cool seeing everyone! bennett and razor were just adorable i love that friendship. loved getting to see albedo again. hes like.. my fav and of course i missed him :/ rerun plz.. ahh yeah a lot of the claymores are more for their skills i guess. except razor. so i get that.

(4/5) i also tend to use the elemental stuff a bit more but just idk claymores are SO SLOW and im just not overly fond. oh yeah polearms do less damage ahha. i like their fighting styles though. theyre faster and just idk it just -works- for me. oh that is SO CUTE they wear friendship tassels )': ooo yeah the rosaria/kaeya/diluc trio is quite fun. would def love to see more of them! rosaria grew a lot on me over 1.4 and seeing her... not be so rude all the time... lol.

(5/5) also im super excited, i did end up pulling childe! IT WAS SO CRAZY. I DID THE MAGICAL TWO 5*S IN A ROW. mona decided to give me c1 because i can never win the 50/50 and then childe was like its okay i know youve been working your butt off getting everything ready for me so here you go <3 and like )': i love him lol his playstyle is so fun and he works great with hu tao. also got rosaria and fischl (who i didnt have) which is great! were you pulling on childes banner at all or just saving?

ALSO thoughts on the 1.5 stuff??? I haven't gotten to watch completely everything yet but it all sounds so good! Zhongli rerun!!! And the housing thing seems super cool? And lower resin for weekly bosses! New world boss too! All the events seem pretty interesting as well so I'm pretty excited! -genshin anon (pretty sure tumblr still only lets you send 5 anon asks an hour or else i would've added this earlier lol)

genshin anon. lol it's okay! everyone is free to like whatever characters they want! yeah diona is.. not involved at all. although she is getting a hangout in 1.5! might be the first one i actually do. her story is pretty sad though from reading all of her profile. yeah you with noelle was me with diona. i was so mad at her at first since i pulled her like... 10 times on xiaos banner. after i got over it i tried her out and now i love her. also its okay! i took like two weeks to respond :P

but omg how do you have tabs open for two weeks.... i get stressed if i don’t leave my computer with everything closed LMAO. i mean yeah it definitely makes sense to put a lot of work into weapons bc they can be used by multiple characters so they’re a good investment!! i should start thinking about that as well......

nice!!! i’m guessing you’re having a good time with hu tao then eh :D my xiao is. okay lmao probably not doing the damage as expected of him but eh whatever <3 

if i’m like really in the mood i can invest a couple hours but most days it takes some self-convincing to even log in asfjdkldsaj like once i’m in the game it’s fine but for some reason the action of opening and loading it up is like hmm.... also most days by the time i do get to play i’m so exhausted from work </3 

omg that sounds fun!! personally i don’t like... playing with strangers that much afjdklasj so i tend to avoid co-op... but one of my friends might start playing genshin so i totally get what you mean about helping lower AR people with bosses and stuff because i wanna do that with her lmao :D 

lmao traded botw faults for the gacha system... you really can’t have it all unfortunately </3 speaking of botw my friend got my the expansion past like. literally last year lmao i’ve been meaning to play it. ugh i’m just so behind in general on all video games unless it’s genshin lmao

i wouldn’t have minded c6 noelle if i had GOTTEN ANYBODY ELSE WHEN I WAS PULLING ON THAT BANNER ;_____; like at least they could have given me a sucrose who i don’t have!!! but i did get keqing on my pity from that banner!! wait omg i didn’t realize that was how it works... i have a vague idea but if that’s true YES ZHONGLI PLEASE COME HOME GOD PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE i’m 100% skipping childe’s banner for zhongli sorry dude ajkdlfaj

ahhh yes getting to see albedo was nice too!!! even if only for a bit hehe it’s nice how they tried to rope in all the mondstadt characters somehow (except. diona jaklsdfja) 

okay mood. i love chongyun to bits but i admit after maining xiao for a while i’m definitely like why is chongyun so... slow asjfkldj but that’s literally just how it works </3 and same about rosaria!!!! she was still pretty like.... moody idk but she’s definitely better when she’s not just being straight up mean lmao

OMG CONGRATS!!!!! you seem to have much better gacha luck than me LMAOOO i envy that but i’m so glad you got everyone you wanted!!! and nah now that zhongli is definitely confirmed i’m DEFINITELY saving for him like actually the last time it was childe than zhongli’s banner was when i just started playing and i wasted all my beginner primogems on childe not knowing who was coming next........ i’m not making that mistake again LMAO

i didn’t watch the livestream but i did see the trailer and AHHHHHHH SO EXCITED omg with the housing i thought we were just getting a house but no it looks like they’re giving us a WHOLE FUCKING VILLAGE like as if i didn’t spend enough time in this game they’re introducing this like you KNOWWWW the hours about to be put into customizing our little house/villages.... 

ohhh i didn’t see the thing about resin!!! wow they really are giving it all. the previews for inazuma were also super pretty!!! and while the new characters have been known for a while this teaser definitely made me more excited for them hehe eula is so prettyyy

and yayyyy diona hangout! is she the only one coming in this version? but i’m glad to see they’ll probably add hangouts for all the characters (or at least the less story-critical ones like zhongli already has his story quest so idk if he’d get a hangout). it’s just nice to see more love given to those characters hehe <3

So from the tease that we got so far, I think the south is doomed,it looks like red lyrium has spread so far and wide destroyed everything on it's path (like that second picture of the Ferelden styled ruin/building) do you think blight and red lyrium will destroy or at least ruined some part of southern continent like Ferelden? And what about red lyrium in tevinter? Is the red lyrium growth in the north as bad as the south?

Hi Nonnie. This became long so I put it under a cut. TN spoilers beneath

My takeaway from it was bit different in some respects. I would guess that the WIPs were less of a “here’s what’s happened in Thedas between Trespasser and the next game”, and were a bit less specific on the major/main storybeats front than the DWR trailer and than a normal proper trailer would be. I would guess that the WIPs are more like a mini tech demo (a tiny slice of next gen capabilities), a nod to fans to show the franchise is still alive and a reel put together to act as an example of environmental stuff that looks cool while also being something which was suitable/safe to show at a corporate event like EA Play.

I took it as telegraphing the following:

‘Hey guys! DA is still a Thing. DA4 is still coming and it’s in development. Here’s a little snippet to reassure / feed / excite you [delete as appropriate lol] and keep the tiny spark alive. Haha lol we still can’t formally announce the game because top-level leadership rules and NDAs’

‘Wow omg! We’re excited about our next-gen stuff. Get a load of that raytracing (and so forth)'

‘Check it out! It’s red lyrium and stuff. These segments are Noticeably, Recognizably Dragon Age™’

‘This is conceptual. We’re still early in development and can’t show you anything more specific than this’ (compare to the similar early conceptual teases of MEA and Anthem)

In terms of major plot aspects*, I took it as:

Indicating or setting the kind of tone, aesthetic and overall feel the next game will have (‘Ooh ominous - dark - creepy.’), like set pieces or color swatches or a free sample/taster session of something

red lyrium is dangerous and the threat of it and its spread will feature in the plot of the next game. (‘The red lyrium threat shown in the background of DAI as in Emprise is returning, and with a vengeance’; ‘Expect to learn more about red lyrium in the next game’)

‘Omg!! What is that beating mass? Ooh!’

I don’t think we can say for certain that the WIPs are set in the south. It can probably snow in parts of the north of Thedas for one thing (see all that Equator stuff), and since several of the assets in the WIPs such as the bearded statues and skull-topped urns are straight out of DAI, it could be a case of asset reuse. If it’s simple asset reuse, devs were probably just making use of what resources they currently had available or were able to currently show, not trying to telegraph a specific location. Given the statues and urns, it’s possible that the buildings were also reused assets, and so not necessarily specifically Fereldan despite the resemblance. It’s also possible that given the nature of the WIPs as a mini tech demo and as a ‘tone setter’ of sorts, that they weren’t created with any specific location in mind. The game was also rebooted and is still far out from release - things could change and such scenes might not even make into the game (see the Crestwood scenes from the DAI marketing cycle). 

About the far and wide and destroying everything in its path, stuff. I don’t doubt red lyrium has spread some and is destructive, but it’s worth mentioning I think, that the three shots we saw look to have been ‘connected’. They seem to have been ‘taken’ in the same place (that place could either be a specific place in Thedas, or just the same ‘set piece’ made for the teaser), going by the similar lighting and how it looks like snow is tracked onto the foreground of the second shot. Example: The mass in the third shot seems like it’s located inside the fortress which is in the top right of the second shot. So it’s possible there’s a tighter ‘focus’ in terms of the spread of red lyrium in the surrounds than what we think.

This is all speculation of course and so I could easily be wrong, but: so, I am unsure about the south being doomed. I do think we’re leaving the south behind, that red lyrium destroys what’s in its path, that it will have spread more by the time of DA4, and that it is a serious problem and is going to be a grave threat faced by Thedas and the PC and crew in the next game. (This was shown in the background plot in Emprise.) Just more like, the threat of red lyrium dooming whole regions is something we will be contending with and trying to stop in the narrative, or at the very least is something which will be part of the backdrop to plotbeats (like why Solas is doing his thing). Would they change whole nations so dramatically like that off-screen between-games, effectively removing or drastically ‘reducing’ those nations as settings? That’s a lot more of a radical change than “And now the Qunari are invading.” They might, that would be something different to what’s been done previously and so be dramatic and new, and you could potentially have an updated south which amounts to ‘Red Lyrium Future Ferelden and Red Lyrium Future Orlais’, but idk. The south doesn’t have to be doomed to cause a narrative move north. I’m thinking about how in DAO, the Fifth Blight threatened to spread across and ruin all Ferelden, but it was stopped and only really properly environmentally scarred parts in the far south near the Wilds. If they did do this, I would expect the story to have a big influx of refugees from Ferelden and Orlais travelling north to escape the issue. I feel like that’s something we’ve already seen before, that was already explored in the Fereldan refugees crossing the Waking Sea and the effects of the influx on Kirkwall in DA2.

I think red lyrium is a major threat to the world (a threat of doom, to all nations, north and south), and that it will have spread further than it had before by the time of the next game. This was seeded as a beat in DAI (literally in the nodes of lyrium in the land and metaphorically in the lore in codexes and such). I think this spread would at least ruin or seriously damage certain regions in the south and possibly elsewhere before the next game, like what we could expect to have happened as a result of the expanding spread in the region of Emprise despite the Inquisition’s efforts. I think it’ll feature prominently in the narrative and that we’ll learn more about it in terms of Dramatic Lore Reveals (considering the intersection it has with the Taint/Blight and the corrupted fleshy sacs in the WIPs). I’m hesitant in thinking that the south more as a whole has been doomed by red lyrium by the time of DA4, and in thinking that’s what the WIPs are saying. Hope this makes sense. 😰 Ofc, all any of us are doing when speculating about the trailer is guessing, so who knows really. 😄

About red lyrium growth in the north: We know less about its growth in the north than we do about its growth in the south. It does seem that it is worse in the south, because after the Breach opened, nodes of it began appearing throughout the surface of the south. The aforementioned Emprise du Lion is the best example of this so far. Makes sense, aside from the Breach it’s in the south that the red lyrium idol was found and in the south that the red templars were largely operating. I do think it’s still a big threat to the north though - it’s clear from stories in Tevinter Nights that some Magisters in Tevinter are messing with it (e.g. the Wigmaker’s experiments) and that remnants of the Venatori are still active in parts of Tevinter. In DAI we saw the Venatori just like the red templars messing with red lyrium: poisoning the well in Wycome, trying to start a supply line in Antiva, trying to smuggle it from the Storm Coast to Minrathous in order to convert the Imperium's slaves into an unstoppable army to turn the tide in the war with the Qunari for Seheron.. (TN was also careful to present us with similar instances of Tevinter nationalism and Tevene desire to restore the glory of the Imperium..  And here we note that both Antiva and Minrathous are northern locations). Stupid behavior like that is exactly how this kind of dangerous thing gets out of control and spreads. And so, I’m sure we can expect to see red lyrium threatening the northern regions in a serious way in DA4.

* I mean I still have been and am gonna speculate wildly and overanalyze, but primarily because doing so is fun for me

Survey #334

"i dreamed i was missing  /  you were so scared  /  but no one would listen,  ‘cuz no one else cared”

Sunrise or sunset? Sunset has prettier colors, imo, but I enjoy the pastel nature of sunrises, too. Are you mentally ill? Oh brother. Are you physically ill? I don't have any serious physical health issues, no. Introvert or extrovert? I'm a very strong introvert. What do you think when you look at your body? That it's fucking disgusting. What have others said when they look at your body? When I was healthy, I was complimented every now and again. With the body I have now? I'm glad people keep their months shut. Do you have a particular song that you feel deeply? There's a good 'ole handful or two. Talk about a time in your life where you have felt most alive? It's weird, I'm not a city person at all, but possibly when I was walking the streets of Chicago with Sara and her dad one evening. There was just so much life, so many new sights, that it was impossible not to. Plus, I was at a very happy point in my life, so. I just enjoyed a lot. Are you confident wearing a bikini? FUCK NO. Have you ever been hurt physically or mentally by a family member? Mentally, obviously. Everyone has at some point. I've never been seriously physically hurt by family, but Mom did spank my sisters and me as kids if we did something wrong. Biggest lie you have told? I don't really know. I get really uncomfortable telling even minor lies, so making a big one would be excruciating. I'm not saying I've never said a biggie, I'm sure in 25 years of life I said something stupid at one point, I just don't remember it. Do you believe in the Illuminati? Nah; there's some compelling evidence, but I just think it's way too big of a secret to keep. Regrets in your life? Blaming the breakup entirely on Jason and saying just plain cruel things to him afterwards. Also sending an appallingly hateful letter to Dad to vent after the divorce. Flirting with my then-best friend's boyfriend at the time behind her back. Dating Tyler (it's a small one, but still a regret). There are others, those are just the only ones coming to me right now. Achievements in your life? Lots of academic success and awards (before college, anyway...), artistic accomplishments like having my work put in a museum, surviving a traumatic breakup, (mostly) recovering from massive depression... What did people say about you in school? Nothing, really. I was a quiet student who just did her work and tried hard. Is there something you have never told anyone? Yes. If you had two days to spend one million dollars how would you spend it? First, I'm paying off college debt. Then Mom gets a new car, followed by me getting new glasses and renewing my permit. I'm getting a good terrarium setup for Venus. Then, it's tattoo time, baby, haha. I can't really do the mental math on how much this all would cost, but those are the high-priority things I can think of. Describe your first kiss? Was it how you imagined? Jason and I were playfighting in bed, and he had me pinned. Our faces were close, and I decided to kiss him. It was a fairy tale moment, in my eyes. He looked so bashful for once (he's far from shy) but also really happy, and I was too. Growing up were you in a wealthy, average, or low income household? Low, I think. Or maybe average, when Dad was still around. Have you been raised by a solo parent? When I was around 17, my parents split, so kinda-sorta. Do you know both your parents? Thankfully, yes. Have you abused drugs or alcohol? No. Are you comfortable accepting compliments? Ehhhh, I really appreciate them and they can make my whole day, but I'm very awkward about it. I get shy. Are you comfortable giving compliments? Oh yes. I honestly love giving compliments; I know how happy they can make me, so why not share that with others? Is any mental illness hindering your life? Guess. (: Is any physical illness hindering your life? Well, it's not an "illness," but the muscles in my legs have severely atrophied from leading such a horribly sedentary lifestyle, and that has greatly affected my ability to work without the risk of just collapsing. Walking at all is painful. Are you preparing for an apocalypse? No. I'm not really one to worry about "prepping." If it happens, it happens, man. I'm not spending loads of money on a "maybe." Are you interested in cults? Not really, no. Are your parents good cooks? Mom is fine, but it's hard to really judge Dad's cooking since he barely ever did it, plus I haven't had his cooking in many, many years. I remember he was great at making breakfast, though. That was like a rare treat, him deciding to make breakfast for everyone. Have you ever been to a chiropractor? Did you like it? No. Do you know anyone who is an actor? No. Have your wisdom teeth come through yet? They never did. Have you ever used a public pay phone? No. Have you ever made an item of clothing? No. Have you taken someone's virginity? No. Is confidence cute? "Confidence, yes. But cockiness and arrogance, no. That’s a whole different area that’s definitely not cute." <<<< Nailed it. Would you be able to date someone who doesn’t make you laugh? Doubt it. Are you one of those people who never drinks soda? No; rather, I drink too much of it. I'm trying really hard to lay off of it, and I drink nowhere near as much as I used to (when oddly enough, I was healthy and fit), but I'm still not comfortable drinking a can and a half a day. Listening to? "Castle of Glass" by Linkin Park. Kinda obsessed. Ever used a bow and arrow? No, but archery is cool. Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer? I don't think this has happened since my senior shot in HS. Take a vitamin daily? Daily, no, but I really should. I take a Vitamin D capsule every Sunday, though. Favorite Taylor Swift song? I only really like "Love Story" and "Picture to Burn." Have you ever cried because you were so happy? Yeah. Which are better: black or green olives? I don't like olives period, but I guess black. What’s your 3rd favourite animal? Huh, never thought of #3, just #1 and #2: meerkats and opossums. Maybe snakes? Do you like mushrooms? NO. NO NO NO. What dream do you remember most vividly? One I don't talk about. A childhood nickname? Mom called me "Twinkie" and still sometimes does. ;-; Does anyone in "real life" know that you take surveys? Would you be embarrassed if they found your blog? Just Sara. And yes, regarding some people. Who was the last person you blocked on social media? Did you have an argument that lead to that happening? I'm unsure, but probably. I don't tend to just like... randomly block people. What was the first social media account you remember signing up for? Are you still a member of that particular website, if it even still exists? Of course it was MySpace. It's still floating around somewhere in cyberspace. What website from your childhood/teen years do you wish still existed? I get nostalgic over the Animal Planet forums sometimes. Have you ever met up with anyone in real life that you first met via the internet? Did you get on as well as you thought you would? Yes, Sara. I felt like it would go just fine, but it went even better than I expected - I was oddly very comfortable around her and her family. Have you ever tried any of those meal replacement shakes? Are you a fan of things like that in general? Yeah; I tried many brands until I settled for Equate, surprisingly. Cheap does not equate to bad quality, my friends. We always have the chocolate ones in the house, and they're really not bad at all. Are you the kind of person to enjoy taking naps? I love me my daily nap, man. What's your favourite kind of cheese to have on a pizza? Idk, whatever cheese is normally used, lol. What's a hobby you loved when you were younger but no longer enjoy for whatever reason? I guess video editing. I can't say I'd no longer enjoy it at all, but now the idea sounds far more like a chore than fun. Is there a popular food/drink that you can't stand? What is it and why don't you like it? I could name five dozen, but here's just a few: coffee, pie, tea, fried chicken (or is that just a Southern thing to be obsessed with?), and... of course now that I'm asked this question, I'm blanking on the huge number I know exist. As for "why," that varies, but it's either just simply a taste or even a texture thing. How would your wedding boquet look like? I want a gothic-themed wedding, so imagine a mix of black and maroon roses... whew-wee. You’re at a bar, and you witness a man drugging some girl's drink. What do you do? No hesitation, I'm decking the motherfucker. Fuck my fear of men, he's getting knocked out, and I'm immediately alerting the staff, as well as of course the girl. Kids? How many? Why? Names? Boy or girl? Y'know, loads and loads of scaly and hairy ones. Got plenty of name ideas depending on what they are and how they look. The only baby whose gender matters to me is the tarantula because females live waaaay longer. Fuck them human babies, not for me. Are you an organ donor? Absolutely. I sure as hell ain't usin' 'em once I'm dead, so consider it my last act of selflessness. Whats the most you’ve ever lost gambling? I don't gamble. What is something you can never give up (that's not love or family)? My pebble from my "graduation" from my first partial hospitalization program. It's meant to symbolize how great pain and trials can file you into something beautiful. It was passed around group, everyone holding it in their hands as they wished me well and spoke their piece about me. I'm honestly just fighting back tears remembering it. Have you ever waited in line overnight for something? No, I'm way too impatient for that shit.. Do you think having an expensive phone is a good investment? Hm. I guess it depends on what you use it for. Have you ever witnessed a birth in person? A human birth, no fucking thank you. I've only ever seen pet cats give birth. Does anyone in your family smoke? My dad does, big time. He quit drinking, but never quite managed to stay away from cigarettes. Have you ever had a pet escape and run away? Seeing as I grew up with outdoor cats that we couldn't afford to fix, pretty much all of our tomcats left for roving once they came of a certain age. Do any of your exes know each other? Juan and Jason know each other, Jason and Girt know one another as well, and Sara and Girt have met. What’s an opinion you find impossible to take seriously? I simply cannot fathom the belief that "dinosaurs never existed." Explain the fucking fossils, like come the fuck on. It's absolute denial in the name of religion. What was the very first election you voted in? This one that just passed, actually. What is one random fact about you? I want like 20 tarantulas but Mom says no. :( Do you spend a lot of time outdoors in the summer? Fuck no, I will do anything to stay inside in summer. Do you wear band tees? if yes, which one is your favorite? I love band tees, yeah. My Ninja Sex Party shirt is the most comfortable, but comfort aside, it's hard to pick a favorite. Possibly my Otep one, 'cuz the design is dope. Do you ever re-arrange your room? No. What season do you want to get married in? Fall. What is the highest name-brand thing you own? Oh god, I don't own expensive brand stuff. I guess the only exclusion would be my Cloak shirt, but even that's not like, mad pricey. What color GameBoy did you have as a kid? Red. What was your favorite GameBoy game? Maybe that Catz game? Even though the music was the most fucking obnoxious meowing ever lmao. What was the last compliment you remember someone gave to you? Who was it? It was this guy in my PHP group; my therapist surprised the fuck out of me by sharing with everyone my most recent poem (I trust him a lot, and he urges me to send him my art, so I've done that twice), and I nearly fucking died from cardiac arrest. However, this Nick guy, who's a poetry major, told me it was better than stuff he reads in his Master's program. I almost cried. Have you ever personally been friends with a stripper or prostitute? No, not that I'm opposed though or anything. If you have tattoos, which one that you have was the most painful? The one on my inner forearm. Have you ever actually met and talked to someone who’s famous? No. When was the last time you got a parking ticket for anything at all? I never have. Do you have any pets who will bite anyone else out there, besides you? No; Roman won't even come close enough to a stranger TO bite, haha. It's funny, he's so goofy and you'd guess outgoing, but instead, he's terrified of people he doesn't recognize. What’s your favorite type of sushi? I don't eat sushi. What’s your favorite patriotic song? Don't have one. Have you ever read a book about a character in a psych ward? No, and I'd really prefer not to because it would just drag me back to dark times. Have you ever been in a mental hospital as a patient? ^ Have you ever had an ulcer? No. Do you like soy sauce? omfg no What’s your favorite store to browse around? Morph Market. @_@ It's a hub for reptiles for sale, and I have my days where I just browse the ball python morphs for like an hour or so, haha. What’s the name of the most recent baby a friend had? Christ, half my friends on Facebook are having babies, idr. I don't know who was the most recent. Do people normally say you’re a fast typer, or are you rather slow? I'm very fast. Have you ever been considered the "smartest person in school?" No; that was my friend Hannia. I'm pretty certain she would qualify as a genius. Her GPA was fucking incredible. Were you named after anyone famous or anyone on television? No.

okay so here’s what i did this weekend. idk if i’m leaving tumblr or not. i haven’t been using it a lot lately, mostly bc i haven’t felt like i’ve had an awful lot to say in general. i’m either going to go away or else start using it again in full force but i do want to tell you what’s happened.

ever since the start of this year, my boyfriend Dylan and I have been making plans for me to move in with him so I don’t have to live with my family any longer (they’re very LGBT-phobic - i was closeted the entire time - but in addition to that were also just really controlling and manipulative and idk i’d go so far as to say abusive esp considering that i have a background of heavy abuse that my family’s behavior doesn’t come close to, but suffice to say it’s Not Good). anyway we were making plans for me to run away from them and move in with him, much like was the case five years ago when i left my father’s house. we figured out the logistics of things like how I’d get to school, where we’d keep my stuff, and so forth. every time I hung out with him at his house, i’d sneak some of my stuff there so that i’d have less of it to take with me when it came time to actually leave, and all throughout i kept trying to plant hints with my family that i might want to live with Dylan at some point and that i knew how to figure things out if i “had to” leave suddenly or whatever (which wasn’t a wholly unreasonable idea given that I live with my grandparents and What If One Of Them Dies but w/e)

this Friday, on the 20th of February, we finally made our escape and I moved in with him.

we loaded up all my stuff minus my instruments in his car (which i said I was going to give to my friend, who is also called Dylan, I’m henceforth going to call him DM as those are his initials - anyway it was not a total lie bc i did have some stuff i wanted to give him and we were gonna hang out with him first, but that’s how i explained having all my stuff outside the house like that), with the plan to come back to get my instruments, say that we “forgot something” and leave a note that i wrote, much like the one i wrote for my dad and that my aunts gave him after i left his house to live with my grandparents. in it, i addressed a conversation i had with my aunt just that week where i talked about things like how i had wanted to move out of my dad’s house even before my family helped me but i didn’t have friends who would help me but i do have friends who can help me with things now, what if i’d left a note at my dad’s house and left it at that without my aunts meeting him face to face about it, my aunt claimed that she cares about my wellbeing and wants me to be in situations where i can feel free and okay and like i’m actually getting something out of life, et cetera.

we met up with DM and his friend Sol, I was nervous as fuck and was more than a bit high on clonazepam and ashwagandha, i told them what i was doing (DM knew i was going to do this At Some Point, Sol didn’t). they were both happy for me. Dylan and I decided then that we’d leave the public place we’d met up at, i’d get my instruments and leave the note (i’d made multiple photocopies of it so different members of the family could all have copies). we did so, i got my instruments, the last thing i did was leave the note, Dylan and I got into the car and I put on “I See Through You” by Uncle Acid and the Deadbeats because i felt like it was really good getaway music. for anyone in my situation who likes stoner metal and needs a good getaway song, that was indeed the perfect soundtrack and i am never ever going to forget how i felt as we left that place for good.

we hung out with DM and Sol for a few hours at DM’s house. i kept feeling afraid that my family would try to call me or message me (i explicitly told them not to call me in the letter). they didn’t during that time, but after i got home with Dylan, Teacher Aunt tried to phone me twice and had sent me a text asking me to call her, saying it wasn’t anything bad. it might not have been related to the note though because she ended up sending a message saying something to the effect of “I got your note. We love you.” Nurse Aunt later sent a text saying “We love you. Text us if you and Dylan need anything.” As every LGBT person knows, “We love you” is family speak for “Come back so we can fix you.” Anyone who knows me knows that I won’t be falling for it.

last night was the first night my boyfriend and i were able to fall asleep together, and this morning was the first morning we were able to wake up together. he made breakfast for us and we talked about things and we both agreed that we were happy that we’d finally done it and we’d finally gotten me out. i’m going to start medically transitioning as soon as possible (DM, who is trans himself, knows all about how to go about transitioning and has agreed to help me with that). i’m going to work on legally changing my name and gender too. by the time i graduate, i’ll hopefully be able to pass well enough that i won’t have to out myself to future employers. 

my aunt sent me a text in which she told me i needed to call her (for reasons that were actually fully reasonable and i did need to call her about them, i’m not going to get into it). i did so and we talked about it and she claimed she wanted to respect me and knew that i was afraid that my family wouldn’t love me and they’d judge me and she wanted to assure me that that wasn’t the case. despite that, she continuously addressed me by my birth name. unsurprising. i might have to call or text her again, but i’m almost definitely not going to have to see her face to face again. and if and when i do, i’ll probably have been on testosterone for a bit so haha fuck you aunt, she’s gonna hate it and i’m gonna love it.

anyway. i’m doing okay. i’m doing better than I have in my entire life. a lot of things are going to change but most of them are going to be for the better. i’m not going to have to be around anyone i Don’t Want To Be Around. it’s exclusively going to be people who actually respect me and accept me. (i mean i’m sure i’ll encounter some shitfucks now and then, the world is full of them and i can’t expect everybody to be decent, my point is that they won’t need to be part of my life now). on Monday, i’m going to meet with my German teacher and tell him what happened, which seems like a weird thing to do but he’s one of the few people in my life who seems like he cares about me in any specific individual way (he says outright that he cares about all of his students), and being that i still have that psychological need for the approval of authority, i’m going to tell him because he’s certainly going to approve and he’s the only authority figure who will. 

but. yeah, i’m living with my boyfriend, i’m going to probably spend a lot more time with DM too (and I’m becoming better friends with Sol too, AND after talking to a classmate in my German class about the situation - we had some time in class where we just talked about whatever together so i told him i had great weekend plans - anyway there’s a guy in my German class called Mitch who I might end up becoming friends with, yay). and also i don’t need my family’s approval for who i’m friends with anymore, which used to be the case but No Longer. so my social life is gonna get a lot better. and everything’s going to get a lot better. this is the thing that i’ve been waiting for. longtime followers of my blog undoubtedly have been waiting for this very day as well. i’m happy to tell you all that that day has come. 

Sleep Aid

A Si/Oc x Sigma fanfiction

Plot: Uahi and Sigma are up late from insomnia, stressed and jittery from the day’s activities, they decide to do something to relax.

Tags: Mutual M, Age Difference, Size Difference, Original Female Character, Dirty Talk. Literally just “What if we did X? Haha, just kidding…. Unless?” Comedy-ish. Bad porno. Idk man.

A/N: Self indulgent AF because I’ve decided I need to establish that Uahi and SIgma have “that” kind of relationship - Just a couple of buddies being pals and doing a little bonding. Also The Beast: Part 2 is still getting written, I just had a rough few days and wrote this dumb thing to make myself feel better.

Xx

Uahi laid on what constituted as Sigma’s bed in his lab as she watched him write and rewrite an equation on a board. Her eyes followed the motions of his hands droopily, exhausted from the day’s training yet stupidly wide awake, untapped stores of energy still inside her with no way of getting out at this time at night.

Sigma was in much the same boat, exhausted by a tedious little meeting that went on much later than he expected. Tired yet completely alert, his mind running through a million things at once, a million things that could be done tomorrow, yet his body was forcing him to do them now, even as the numbers and letters he wrote were starting to look more and more like gibberish to his straining eyes. 

The two of them usually sat up late together like this, both insomniacs on even their best days, but tonight just felt especially ridiculous as the clock ticked by, showing the time in bold red numbers.

03:00 AM.

Uahi stretched out on his bed which was much, much larger than her and custom made to fit Sigma’s large body, usually it was a delightful haven for her sore and battered body after a long training day, but tonight it just felt so.. Uncomfortable. No matter how much she twisted and turned, no matter the weird angle she tried to place her limbs in, no matter what she tried she just could not get comfortable.

“Siiiiigmaaaa.” She groaned, loudly, defeated.

Sigma sighed and wiped down his board again, whatever he had written not making any sense to him. “Yes?” He asked, hearing Uahi groan.

“I’m tired.” She grumbles behind him, saying similar multiple times tonight.

“I know, but what can we do?” He says with a sigh, going back to writing… something, on the board.

“Masturbate.” She says before letting out a long “Ayyyyyy.”

Sigma cracks a tired smile at the sound of her fake bostonian accent, easily imagining her shooting him finger guns while saying it. He rolls his eyes a little. Even while completely exhausted his friend didn’t miss an opportunity for a crude joke, how admirable. 

A stretch of silence settled between them, with only the squeaking of his pen against the board as Sigma wrote another batch of equations and Uahi’s steady breathing as she stared up at the ceiling and watched a few wisps of her hair flow above her. 

The idea felt like it hung in the air between them. The two had always been pretty flirtatious with one another, dirty jokes and innuendos a common part of their bantering, but for some reason this instance felt… different. Maybe it was the lack of sleep lowering their inhibitions but the idea of getting off right now sounded really… nice. The total relaxation afterward would probably make trying to sleep easier. It’s worked for them, separately, before...

Doing it now wasn’t that much different from doing it alone… right?

“Haha, that’s a weird thought, right?” She laughed awkwardly and sat up a little on her forearms, looking over at him. 

Sigma is blushing as he looks back at her, too tired to really try and hide it and Uahi unconsciously bites her lip at the sight, he’s always looked so handsome when he blushed. His eyes roamed her body, taking in her relaxed pose and the loose sleeping clothes she wore, admiring her curves and muscles and the intricate tattoos on her arms before his eyes slid up to her face lingering on her lips for a moment before meeting her gaze.

“Unless…” His tone has shifted just a little and it’s her turn to blush, causing him to smile. 

It wasn’t that different… right?

Sigma put his pen down and gently drifted toward Uahi on his bed, who sat up completely and shuffled back until her back hit a wall, eyes locked with his as he came closer and cheeky smile plastered on her face. 

“Damn, didn’t know it was so easy to get you into bed.” She teased as he sat down on the edge and took off his day clothes, throwing them to the side, and leaving himself in an undershirt and boxer briefs.

“To be fair, this is my bed,” He scooted back until his back met the wall next to her, dwarfing her a little in comparison to him, even sitting down, “What should it mean that you’re already here?”

“That you can’t take a hint.” She stuck her tongue out at him and he chuckled.

Settling in next to her, his legs outstretched in front of him, he stretched and yawned, relaxing against the wall, already feeling a sort of warmth pool at the pit of his stomach, the reality of what they were going to do slowly seeping into him.

Uahi felt a little jittery, excitement and embarrassment mixing into a concoction that made her want to both get on with it and to just get up and leave right now, filling her with more restless energy.

They sat silently next to each other, neither knowing exactly how to start, before she piped up “You wanna see my favorite porno?” she asked.

“What?” That sort of caught him off guard and he blinked down at her, face going red again.

“I mean, we’re not just going to try and do this alone, right?” She asked as she got on her knees and crawled toward the edge of the bed, reaching under it.

“I guess not,” He started, looking off to the side a little, feeling a little sheepish. “truth be told, I didn’t really think about it.”

She snorted and brought up his smartpad, talon issued, and most likely monitored. He tried not to use it much outside of his work because of that, but it seemed Uahi had no qualms with using it for any personal activity she wanted as she scooted back next to him, already tapping away in the search menu. As a video loaded up, the title of witch he didn’t catch, she held it up in front of them, and knowing what she wanted without her asking, he suspended it in the air. It was a little funny, they’ve done similar for watching normal movies together, ironic that they’d do the same for a dirty one.

Uahi leaned against him as the video started playing, and she smiled when he heard him scoff at the title, “O-asis University 7: The Hard Professor.” 

“Really? This your favorite dirty movie?” He asked as he watched the video open with a stock video of the city and university.

“Oh, so you’ve seen it before.” She said, wriggling her eyebrows.

He rolled his eyes and scoffed, smiling, “No, but I’ve heard of the series… can’t believe they made seven.”

“They’ve made thirty actually, but I dropped off after seventeen.” She said nonchalantly.

The scene transitioned into a classroom set, shot on a cheap camera of course, though he could give them props for somehow finding something similar to the actual rooms at the University, at least from what he could remember.

“Why did you drop it?” He asked, the talking easing him into the fact he really was going to watch a porno with her.

“Recasting mostly,” She shrugged, “My two favorite actors had such good chemistry, when they got replaced it just wasn’t the same.”

There were two characters on screen, an older but handsome man wearing an ill fitting and cheap looking suit, obviously the ‘hard” professor, and a woman wearing an equally cheap looking knock off of the uniforms there only more… revealing. Their  innuendo filled dialogue was a bit cringy on paper, but the delivery was actually done pretty well, by porn parody standards. Sigma snorted at a particularly awful joke and Uahi giggled, and it went on like that through the painful introduction. When it finally got to actual sex he had to admit, it seemed almost believable, and sort of personal, but it wasn’t really his cup of tea if he was being honest.

He looked over to Uahi to make an observation about the whiteboard in the background containing an interesting equation but when he saw the way her eyes focused on the screen, face red, and worrying her lip between her teeth, he was shut up instantly, feeling his blood run hot at the sight.He watched as Uahi began to fidget a little, her hands balling into her shirt as she watched with rapt attention, legs subtly rubbing together as she got worked up. It was strangely cute… and very arousing. He felt himself harden a little as she shifted around, pressing her thighs together as the scene turned rougher.

Uahi meanwhile was just too focused on what was unfolding to notice Sigma’s staring, the sense of drama and story elements always able to suck her in before the fucking really solidified her attention. She loved the series with her whole heart, and the unfolding relationship between Professor Richard Longhard and Kitty Galore was always her favorite sub plot, plus they were both hot as all hell. 

As the dear professor bent his student over his desk and began teasing her with a light spanking, Uahi’s fingers just about dipped into the waistband of her sleeping shorts, only pulling at it slightly, holding off from actually touching herself due to where she was, still sort of hesitant. 

Sigma noticed this and held back a groan, a hand cupping himself through his boxers as the other flexed on his thigh, attention completely on Uahi as she became a bigger and bigger mess, hair rising higher and higher she got hotter and hotter. 

There was a loud moan coming from the screen and Sigma looked back at it and caught the “hard professor.” slowly stuffing his large meat into the smaller woman while he leaned over her on the desk, whispering something in her ear.

“He has such a pretty dick.” Uahi’s voice came out strained, tinted by the faintest whine but full of desire.

“Not the sort of description I would use.” Sigma said, trying to hold back the waver in his voice as he watched too.

Uahi smiled, “Why, what does your dick look like?~” she teased, wiggling her eyebrows, leaning up into his side.

He gulped and nudged her back playfully, causing her to giggle, “Perfectly normal, if you must know.” 

“Really, not old and wrinkly like you?” She teased harder, hand snaking its way up and into the side of his shirt, small and hot against his skin, tickling his ribs a little.

He swatted her away again, laughing, and she giggled, shifting so that her back was toward the hovering smartpad now and looking at him, “Come on, out with it, I wanna see~” She said, looking at him expectantly, face red with a large, goofy smile.

He chuckled, nerves kind of on fire now that her attention was all on him with his erection so painfully obvious in his briefs. He shifted a little, feeling awkward. He didn’t want to stop, but he definitely didn’t want to be the only one who was exposed.

Uahi saw his hesitance and she realized she probably should break the ice a little first. Quickly, so as not to let herself lose confidence, she pulled her shorts off her legs and threw them over the side of the bed.

His breath hitched, his eyes went wide, his face somehow grew hotter and his hard cock throbbed as Uahi crawled over his leg and sat between his knees, which he widened to make room for her. She sat down and slowly opened her legs for him, making his mouth grow dry as she revealed her wet core to him. 

She felt emboldened by his focused, wide eyed but dazed stare at her, fighting to urge to cover herself as she leaned back onto her forearms. “Your turn, old man.” She said with a wink, and shot him the smuggest smile she could muster in her slowly dizzying state.

Sigma gulped, eyes focused on her glistening lips, as his thumbs hooked into his  waistband, slowly lowering it down. His cock sprang up as the cloth moved off it, hitting him softly in his stomach, and he heard Uahi’s breath hitch at the sight. His gaze moved to her face, and the look she was giving him matched the way she was looking at the video earlier, making his cock throb and his heart clench.

It was not in fact, wrinkly or old, or “perfectly normal” either, he was huge, thick and long, and with a sprinkling of salt and pepper hair at the base. Already leaking a little, and having a beautifully delicious red tip, it made her mouth water.

“It’s uh…  wow… you’re big.” Her voice sounded breathless and he smiled inwardly at it, his ego and confidence getting a sizable boost from that.

“Think I match up with Professor Longhard?” He joked, and she snorted a laugh,

“Honestly I think you’re bigger.” And it was his turn to laugh.

This felt good, nice, two friends just.. Hanging out. 

Uahi leaned over to one arm as her other hand snaked up from beside her and petted her mound in front of him, not touching herself, but just teasing a little. Sigma hummed in approval and his own hand began to lightly feel up his cock, even with his hand wrapped around it at his base a good five inches stood out of his grasp. She drooled a little at the sight and moved her fingers lower over her sex, lightly running it around her lips. She shivered at the feeling, but Sigma could do nothing more than watch and start to move his own hand on his hard cock.

Uahi slipped her own fingers between her slick folds, gathering the wetness and spreading them around, loving the way Sigma moaned at the sight, his hand slightly picking up speed. She spread herself with her fingers with a wink and actually laughed at the way he choked.

“You’re a dirty girl, you know that?” He said with a glare, his hand squeezing himself for more delicious pressure.

“Mhmm, a dirty girl for a dirty old man.” She replied, licking her lips and fluttering her eyes in a very faux sexy manner which made him roll his eyes.

She slipped a finger in herself carefully, and Sigma groaned as he watched it disappear, hand following her speed. She tensed a little at it, more sensitive than she expected, and let out a shaky sigh. She slipped another finger in too, and began to pump them into herself in a steady rhythm, moaning as he began to leak pre at the sight.

“So Beautiful.” The words slipped from his mouth without realizing it, and her body flushed darker.

She moaned and fell back to free her other arm, hand going to rub at her clit, his words hitting her like a freight train with desire. She rolled her hips, the new stimulation putting her closer and closer to the edge.

She was watching him, pupils blown wide with desire, turning her dark brown eyes almost black. He groaned at the sight of her, laid almost bare before him, looking at him with hunger, playing with herself in front of him, watching him, watching his hands and face and his swollen cock. He shifted, shaking as he did, and arched over her, one arm bracing himself next to her head as he continued rutting into his hand, the tip of his cock so achingly close to her core.

“What are you thinking of?” he asked, breathlessly above her flustered face, head framed by the twisting and writhing wisps of her hair..

She bit her lip, looking off to the side, “Y-you.” She said, her voice needy and… vulnerable.

His heart fluttered at the admission and the tone, “And what about me?” He asks, hotly yet tenderly.

She whines and her hips leave the bed for a moment, “Fuck.. i don’t know, just… your stupid handsome face and your stupid big cock and just...” she grinds out before shutting her eyes tightly and taking a moment to breath.

His hand cups her face with his free hand and she leans into it, when she opens her eyes, they’re dark and focused, a dangerous, hungry look.

“I’m thinking about you Sigma, and you, splitting me open.” Her voice was shaky, needy, wanton. 

She lifts her hips again, rolling them, making the faintest hint of contact between them  and making him moan and stutter his hips. She laughed breathlessly, nuzzling into his hand, 

“I want you to ruin me~” She said, fluttering her eyes, and taking his thumb into her mouth.

He flexed his thumb in her mouth to push on her tongue, moaning at the feel of her soft wet mouth as he hunched over her, imagining himself doing what she asked. Of him dipping his hips lower, just a bit lower, and hilting inside her in one hard thrust. Thrusting inside her at a brutal pace, causing her to scream, to beg, to cry for him. To hold onto him like her life depended on it as he fucked her open, more open than she probably ever been. God, he wanted to ruin her too, wanted to touch and taste and just… destroy her.

He squeezed his cock as he felt his balls tighten, his climax coming soon at the images she’s conjuring up, but he didn’t want to cum, not yet, not until she does.

He dipped his head down next to her, “You’d be such a good girl you’d let me do that, right? Let me tear you open? Use you? Would that make you happy?” He whispered into her ear, a bit frantic but  dripping with arousal.

She nodded her head a little, his thumb in her mouth, whining around the finger, her hips picking up more as her fingers worked herself faster. He joined her in that fact, thrusting harder into his tight, wet hand above her, frantically trying to chase and hold off his own end.

“You look so pretty like this, such a pretty mess, and a mess all for me.” His words where making her stomach flip and twist, too soft, too tender, too loving, she wanted to cry and laugh and kiss him and hear him say more, but she felt herself starting to peak and she could do nothing but cry out around his thumb.

“S-si-gma.” Her broken sob made his heart clench as she tensed up under him.

Seeing her come undone was a trigger for his own and he muffled his cry in the mattress as he bit down beside her head. He tensed and shook as he tried to keep himself up, feeling himself empty a thick load, his hand pumping every last drop out of him as he chased the high longer. When he finally finished, he collapsed beside her, panting.

A few minutes of them doing nothing but panting and contemplating what they just did passed before Uahi broke the silence again with a laugh, a genuine, bubbly laugh, that had him joining quiet easily.

“I can’t believe we just did that.” She said clapping a hand over her eyes, astonished

“Me neither, that was quite an… experience.” He looked at her, smiling, still a little out of breath. “Are you alright?”

She turned and faced him, scooting closer, “Yeah, I am, it was fun.” she said with a yawn.

He wrapped an arm around her and brought her into his side until she could rest her head on his shoulder, “I guess it’s finally time to sleep.”

The two began to drift asleep, warmth seeped into their bones, completely relaxed against each other, and basking in the warmth of each other's presence. As they were on the cusp of sleep a thought occurred to Uahi,

“Sigma, what happened to the smartpad?”

the audubon society plants list finally loaded kids let’s do a brief (haha) cold medicine induced analysis of what the heck they’re recommending for my local area (western PA) and whether it could grow in my shitty yard (if i’m unfamiliar with it i’m skipping it just to be fair)

It’s alphabetical by common name I guess so ok i’m doing this under a cut I supppose

Allegheny Monkey Flower (Mimulus ringens) - this plant is indeed one you see kinda often...... on the very edge of the Allegheny river literally growing as a marginal plant. not ideal unless you got a pond or live in a swamp

Allegheny Serviceberry (Amelanchier laevis) - this is one you see growing in the woods near swamps so nope, not in this drought hellscape of a yard

Alternate-Leaf Dogwood  (Cornus alternifolia) - another understory moisture loving tree/shrub... next

American Beech (Fagus grandifolia) - again, moisture loving woodland tree. European Beeches are overall more drought tolerant so if you see a beech in the city or suburbs, it’s probably not an American Beech. also, in my area, you can’t find an American Beech that isn’t suffering from Beech bark disease unfortunately

American Black Elderberry  (Sambucus nigra ssp. canadensis) - These are good plants and grow all along the shady woodsides here. Same issue though, they like moisture and at least partial shade. And the ornamental varieties you can find at garden centers tend to be European hybrids with fancy leaves

American Pokeweed (Phytolacca americana) - shadey woodland lad again. They’re also very very weedy idk that anyone would want this in their garden.

American Witch-Hazel  (Hamamelis virginiana) - a good plant. still needs moist soil but I think would probably be ok. It looks really cool planted near grasses because it blooms in fallish

Big Bluestem  (Andropogon gerardi) - finally a prairie plant!! it’s my boy big bluestem. unfortunately, it can look kinda wild and weedy for a suburban garden unless you do it right.

Black Chokeberry (Aronia melanocarpa) - handsome, good, nice berries, good fall foliage, excellent choice, prefers full sun but still likes it a bit moist and will drop all its bottom leaves and turn fall colors early if you underwater it oops i definitely  never was responsible for that at work with b&b aronias.

Black Raspberry (Rubus occidentalis) - oh word we got these in our garden and the birds actually like the red ones better rip

Black-Eyed-Susan (Rudbeckia hirta) - that’s right babey it’s Susan. this baby will reseed all day in sun or shade and birds love that shit. downfall is the species plant is prone to rust and cultivars do a bit better.

Butterfly Milkweed  (Asclepias tuberosa) - Good and Wholesome friend. I don’t recommend this as baby’s first milkweed though because they can be slow to establish and kinda disappointing and small and if you get caterpillars on it the first year, it may not survive.

Cardinal-Flower (Lobelia cardinalis) - my mom actually has managed to keep a Lobelia alive in the shadiest, wettest part of her garden but listen...... this is a marginal or swamp plant. Put it in the swamp.

Common Buttonbush  (Cephalanthus occidentalis) - it’s the bae

Common Milkweed (Asclepias syriaca) - do not try to buy this as an established plant at a garden center, they will look at you funny and point at the roadsides. Either wait until fall seedpod time and go harvest some or buy some seeds online

Common Snowberry (Symphoricarpos albus) - I had no idea this was native actually but it’s cool because it gets big white ORBS

Common Winterberry (Ilex verticillata) - it’s got stems. it’s got berries. it can grow wherever. what more could you want??? english holly who?????

Common Yarrow (Achillea millefolium) - actually often confusingly hybridized with European Yarrows so no one knows whether they’re ~true~ natives or not. Who cares they will survive anything except a swamp. They will live in a drought ass no topsoil suburban neighborhood like a CHAMP. they were made for this.

Dense Gayfeather (Liatris spicata) - just including this one because it sounds like a Good Omens joke

Flowering Dogwood (Cornus florida) - put that baby tree back in the moist woodlands where it came from or so help me

Gray-Head Mexican-Hat  (Ratibida pinnata) - ayyy prairie plant, though this isn’t the species you commonly see for sale at garden centers and this one is decidedly less phallic than R. columnifera so that’s a bummer.

Great Blue Lobelia (Lobelia siphilitica) - we half killed this at work because it doesn’t love pot culture or me but someone still bought it all. don’t put this in your dry ass suburban neighborhood or she will hate you too

Northern Bayberry (Morella pensylvanica) - i call this myrica pensylvanica but whatever. birds love it. so do japanese beetles unfortunately

Pennsylvania Sedge (Carex pensylvanica) - it’s a sedge

Red Columbine (Aquilegia canadensis) - unlike other columbine, this bitch likes full sun and probably will grow and reseed anywhere

Redbud (Cercis canadensis) - another understory-ish moisture loving tree but a lot of the cultivars do just fine in the middle of sad suburban yards. also good. blooms wherever it wants while nakey.

Scarlet Beebalm (Monarda didyma) - you will only ever find cultivars of this but who knows, they may slightly more mildew resistant for at least a little while

Shag-Bark Hickory (Carya ovata) - big, handsome, looks like it’s seconds away from falling apart at all times. just how i like my men.

Smooth Oxeye (Heliopsis helianthoides) - please let the one in my mom’s yard know that it’s meant to survive dry soils in full sun

Spotted Beebalm (Monarda punctata) - my favorite bee balm but doesn’t have the Wow factor of M. didyma cultivars. It likes the sun and dry though

Spotted Touch-Me-Not (Impatiens capensis) - wholesome friend! But no one in their right mind would plant this on purpose in their garden also it would be wilt-city out here in the drought ass topsoil-less surburbs. these babies used to grow between the greenhouses and I used to water them like some kinda of bleeding heart

Swamp Milkweed (Asclepias incarnata) - she can actually live pretty well in the middle of drought ass suburban yard and spreads easily by seed but expect half the lower leaves to yellow and drop off by midsummer. poor darling. put her back in the swamp. This is the most reliable commerically available milkweed you will find because it takes to pot culture way better than other milkweeds (rip all the butterfly weed horticulture land kills yearly)

Sweet-Bay (Magnolia virginiana) - more like sweet bae am I right???? actually she wouldn’t live in my yard. needs some afternoon shade and moist, rich soil.

Sweet-Scented Joe-Pye-Weed (Eutrochium purpureum) - It’s Joe!!!!! Will grow all over. Will get 7 feet tall with massive flowers just because he can. Will grow in a swamp, will grow on a hillside, will grow beside Wal-Mart. Joe don’t care. I still call it Eupatorium because I resist change and actually I’m not 100% sure if this or E. fistulosum that is most common around here.

Tall Tickseed (Coreopsis tripteris) - coreopsis is a really popular genus to see on native plant lists but there aren’t many native to my area of Pennsylvania and you won’t find anything but C. verticillata or C. lanceolata cultivars in garden centers. BUt  apparently this bitch can get NINE FEET TALL i’m swooning

Trumpet-Creeper (Campsis radicans) - ok, i’d avoid planting this baby unless you know exactly what you’re doing. she may be native but she can and will do her best to eat your home and foundation and your garden in general. she will do her rhizomey best to runner away from you into the wilderness. fun to grow across a pergola though but she will EAT your TREES and your HOME

Virginia-Creeper  (Parthenocissus quinquefolia) - ????? no one is going to deliberately plant this, Audubon Society

Wand Panic Grass (Panicum virgatum) - this is why I think making these lists with common name first is so hilarious because what????? I know this as “Switchgrass” which sounds nice and normal wtf is a Wand Panic Grass. that’s what i’m going to call bad bottom dysphoria episodes from now on

White Turtlehead (Chelone glabra) - likes it wet and shaded so wouldn’t do nice in my yard. also why even BOTHER planting this plant unless you’re going to do the cultivar ‘Hot Lips’ (jk probably the white one is more native insects friendly)

Wild Hydrangea (Hydrangea arborescens) - she’s cute and all but if you want a Hydrangea just go full cliche H. paniculata cultivar or nothing. This plant would hate my whole entire yard and then die

anyway, that’s all the plants on the list I felt like rambling about on this fine Tuesday morning. Overall, idk how helpful a list like this would be for first time gardeners, because they would run into the issue of not being able to actually their hands on most of these plants.

Very few on the list would actually be suitable for growing in a new suburban neighborhood or an urban garden. This is an area naturally full of sensitive, woodland, rich, moist soil-loving plants... and unfortunately, those areas are disappearing more and more under new developments and the native pollinators and wildlife are going along with them.

Carly & Drew

Carly: hey Carly: gimme more of what i got last time yea Carly: she had fun on that Drew: Yeah? Drew: tah for the tip-off Drew: doubt she's in the party mood rn though Drew: not seen her for days Carly: ha Carly: heard u need em boy Carly: im bringing the party thats why uve not seen her Drew: who fed you that bullshit like Drew: you still gotta get yours from somewhere Carly: idk 😢 girl @ the other nights party Carly: k so gimme Carly: im not paying tho Carly: u made her sad u make it better Drew: hmm well you know what girls are like, yeah Drew: don't all play nice like yous two Carly: yea & i kno what lads say girls r like too Drew: ain't saying nothing that ain't true me Drew: so I didn't make her sad Carly: dont u kno the truth hurts Drew: better than bullshit though Carly: u like her Carly: u want her to like you Carly: be nice Carly: be fun Drew: how do i know you won't just take it all girl Carly: aw u wanna watch Carly: cute Drew: if it's cute you're doing it wrong Carly: ha Carly: u dont kno her v well do u Drew: I know her well as you do Drew: always up for more Carly: when you run out of drugs you should pick up a 🎤 & try comedy Carly: everyone knows im the one who plays rough Carly: shes sweet Drew: stock is pretty depleted so thanks for the suggestion Drew: reckon you could stock shelves Drew: maccies, maybe Drew: like I said, maybe yous ain't doing it right Carly: ha ty baby 💛 Carly: gimme what i need for free & im good Carly: like i said love that u want an invite Carly: but idk if shed be into it Carly: she dont like ur hair Drew: you expect me to remember what you order? Drew: cute Drew: yeah she does Carly: like u forget anything about her Carly: cuter Drew: where are you then Carly: [sends location] Drew: you together or what Carly: shes on her way if you wanna wait for her Drew: I should talk to her, actually Drew: she's not told you then Carly: that her bro came to you yea Carly: why wouldn't she Drew: so, not total bullshit Drew: just not the full truth Carly: ? Drew: you said she's sad yeah Drew: don't be thick Drew: why would she be sad if he was just getting a few tabs or something Carly: cos he wasnt Carly: im not that thick Carly: i dont need her to spell out his exact order tho not working under the golden arches yet am i Drew: maybe not Drew: maybe if you were paying I'd say different but do you think getting her high is the best thing for her right now Carly: aw u think u kno better Carly: uve got it really bad Drew: so you don't fuck Drew: and you don't talk Drew: what do you actually do Drew: or is it all just for attention like Carly: we do everything Carly: its cute that you think im gonna get graphic so u can wank about it but like Drew: never been shy before Drew: everyone knows Carly: never been in love before boy Carly: everyone knows that too Drew: and I've got it bad Drew: Jesus Carly: this is mutual tho Carly: different vibe Carly: take ur pining to church if u wanna Carly: loves a trier he do Carly: i been schooled on all that Carly: probably keep your hands off yourself tho its a sin Drew: how long though eh Drew: her last didn't last very long Drew: but you know all about that, like Carly: ill take the credit yea Carly: dont be jealous Carly: youre cute too Carly: just not as cute as me Drew: this month maybe Carly: ha Carly: the flavour's 🍓 Carly: what are you? Drew: you already stoned babe? Carly: you gonna be even more 💔 if I am Carly: or that you're vanilla Drew: I know that girl didn't tell you that Carly: do u Drew: like i said Drew: probably lying anyway Drew: idk who you mean Carly: k Drew: you take the piss Drew: no more freebies Carly: after this im not asking baby Carly: relax Drew: yeah right Drew: that rep precedes you too Carly: didnt ask just got Carly: cos yea my rep does Drew: no one gets freebies forever girl Carly: nobodys talking about forever but you boy Drew: you'll still be needing it when you're cleaning up kid's vom from the ballpit Drew: trust me Drew: i know all the types Carly: u get paid for that Carly: be able to afford u Drew: afford my merchandise anyway Drew: my time's a whole other thing babe Drew: speaking of, be there in 15 so be there alright Carly: im there Carly: 💛 Drew: good girl Carly: did that work on the girl from the party? Drew: you wish you knew Carly: ha maybe Carly: but i wouldnt tell u if i did Drew: why not Carly: not me u like Drew: aw don't be jealous Drew: nuff to go round Carly: im not jealous & ur not slick Carly: but k ill try & remember Drew: yeah right Drew: you already told be Carly: what Drew: you so want me Drew: ha Carly: ur pretty ive told lots of people i think u are Carly: so Drew: you're so weird Carly: can be Carly: like you said my rep is well known Drew: yeah Carly: tell me how u like it & ill be that if the day ever comes Carly: but it probably wont Drew: you flirt a lot for someone who's so in love Carly: aw u think im flirting Carly: u havent seen me do it yet Carly: this is talking Carly: im bored Drew: i know Drew: you said Drew: sweet, right Carly: im not gonna tell her ur a good listener Drew: she knows Carly: how? Drew: we talked loads about her brother like Carly: mean then i have 2 ask u to make shit better u kno Carly: shes special u should be trying harder Drew: i can't make her brother not a junkie can i Carly: neither can she Carly: so she dont wanna think about it Carly: feel about it Drew: i'm coming ain't i Carly: u were gonna make me beg tho Carly: least i kno now thats ur thing Drew: this is still my living ain't it Carly: not asking for ur whole stash Carly: bet u gave party girl freebies & u dont even remember her Drew: i bet she didn't need as much as you 2 Carly: ha Carly: if u kno my rep u kno how needy i am baby Drew: ha yeah Drew: not my thing babe Carly: 😢💔 Carly: ur cute Drew: yeah yeah you said Carly: i said pretty Carly: different words Drew: same bollocks Carly: mean Carly: & untrue Drew: i told you that ain't my thing Carly: being nice? Carly: she won't like u Carly: too late to be in her bad boyfriends club Drew: i ain't bad Carly: what are you Drew: wouldn't you like to know Drew: maybe one day Carly: nvm i kno Carly: ur boring Drew: just giving you your chat back Drew: told you it weren't it babe Carly: aw u want my good chat Drew: be less of a waste of time sure Carly: ur one of those lads Carly: cant get hard til ive talked u up Drew: well you ain't paying so Carly: so u want me to fuck you Carly: or what Drew: obviously not Drew: it's a favour for her Carly: so u want her to fuck you Carly: good luck Drew: no Drew: jesus Drew: shut up and i'll be there sooner Carly: be more fun when u are here Carly: so boring Drew: why ain't you with her Carly: shes on her way remember Drew: need a job walsh Drew: no time to be bored Carly: aw u offering Drew: haha Drew: fuck no Drew: you'd be the worst drug dealer in the world Carly: would i Drew: yeah Drew: you can't be doing half the shit Carly: so u never dip in Carly: like i said boring Drew: got money tho ain't i Carly: i dont need money Drew: yet Drew: you've got a few years at best before you ain't young and pretty enough Drew: already told you Carly: i knew u thought i was pretty too Carly: aw Drew: have that on the house as well Drew: you are desperate weren't wrong Carly: never said u were Carly: not here cos i dont want drugs am i Drew: not what i was chatting on but yeah Drew: save some face now girl Carly: u reckon i need you to tell me im pretty Carly: why would i need you to be the first lad to chat like that to me Drew: you're bored? Drew: fuck knows Carly: not trying to get more bored then Drew: me either Drew: g2g Drew: you're next drop Carly: k Carly: have fun