#i'm also not sure if going into the horniness of it all is a wise move on a fandom blog so i'm keeping this as a footnote pretty much
Note
robin <3 i'd love to hear about robins own, personal views on his sex and gender, please!
Thanks for the ask, Fray!! (answering it gives me something to do while i wait for the electricity to come back on!)
I'm putting this under a cut, because I've been typing for a while now and I feel like this'll be a long one. I will add that I'm briefly mentioning an eating disorder under the cut, in case you or anyone else wants to back out of reading that.
For the longest time Robin didn't really have any views on his sex or gender. He had a lot going on as a neurodivergent kid/teen due to poverty and, well, the repressed queerness; was just out there functioning/surviving somehow and was in general just pretty miserable all around, so any discomfort about his gender identity/expression was just part of a big heap of everyday sensory overload. There really wasn't time for him to focus on or take a closer look at himself much, and besides, he wouldn't have known the terms needed to put it into words.
He developed a bunch of unhealthy coping mechanisms about All Of That (drugs, sex, an eating disorder, ...) and really spiralled for a while until he met this man called Murdoc, who sort of became a mentor to him, and set him straight again.
And if Murdoc's one thing, it's perceptive.
So while Robin and him travelled together for a while, he provided him with the space he needed to just take a breather for once. Maybe express himself for once. And the option to talk about his feelings instead of having to bottle them up. And most importantly, since his wife Cynthia is a trans woman, he taught him the terms he needed to put all that dysphoria related turmoil he had going on into words.
So really, up until that point Robin hadn't thought about it much. Not thinking about it meant not having to deal with it, he was just hoping all those weird feelings, whatever they are, would go away one day. But of course they wouldn't have if he'd just continued to keep on going like that.
Now that he'd talked those feelings through with someone and then went on to change up his gender presentation, though, things got a hell of a lot easier. Murdoc used the right pronouns for him, called him by the name they'd chosen together (one of his favorite wildshapes to use to spy on people is an odd looking robin, and they both decided it's a nice fit), and after a while of that, Robin began to cook up medicine (cough, testosterone) that would change his body.
And all of a sudden he just felt GOOD about himself for once. His body wasn't just existing to carry him through the days anymore, instead he actively liked looking at it. His voice didn't hurt his ears anymore, it just sounded right. There was growth and hair in the right places and muscles where there used to be softness that he'd previously tried to get rid of by starving himself down to the bones.
See, and only then is when he started to really develop views on his gender and sex.
He is and always was, by all definitions of the word, a bisexual man, even when he was still blocking out the thought and just hoping for the dysphoria to go away on its own. Gender non-conforming (if he can wear them in a masculine way, he still wears many of his old clothes because he can't afford new ones for example, and he's insanely fond of jewelry, be that piercings, earrings, rings, bracelets, ankle bracelets, waist chains, etc) and somewhat gentler than other men he's gotten to know so far, sure, but really not all that different. Transitioning, to him, was like a lifeline he didn't know he needed extended to him, but now that he's gotten a hold of it, he wouldn't ever let it go.
Masculinity can be expressed in very many ways, and his way of expressing it is being forceful like rumbling thunder and strong like a centuries old oak that you can shelter underneath. He'll bear the brunt of the storm for you and keep you safe. And when it's over, and you open your eyes, rather than the lashing rain, you'll see the beauty of the sun's first rays shining through the greenest leaves you've ever seen, while their warmth caresses you.
(One thing I'll say (and it is really just more of a game-related issue) is that his in-game model looks pretty unchanged in terms of testosterone changes even after all the mods I installed to get him a little closer looking to himself. It does unfortunately have a lot of people jumping to the conclusion that he's some flavor of non-binary or futch/butch (and leaving comments that make ME dysphoric at the end of the day lmfao), when in reality, looking at him would not really differentiate him from a cis man and I'm simply limited by the game. There is no room to doubt his gender if going off "traditional" (binary) characteristics. He does bind his chest sometimes, and he usually wears his clothes in a way that covers/hides the shape of what's underneath. Funny enough, I am currently working on a painting of him and I'm kinda hyped about the absolute physical likeness I'm achieving with it, so I'm adding a little WIP!!)
#bg3#ask#there is so much more that weighs into his gender expression#he's biracial and one way or another that does also influence it somewhat#growing up cut off from his infernal heritage and avoiding it because of it being the root cause of generational trauma#definitely also influences his understanding of masculinity#but all in all he wasn't really thinking about his gender and sex much until someone nudged him towards exploring it#after they caught on to him being uncomfortable with himself#and from then on he really fell in love with himself#is the tl;dr of it#without the an*rexia talk that's under the cut#i'm sorry if this is all disjointed i have been typing for like an hour lmfao#i'm also not sure if going into the horniness of it all is a wise move on a fandom blog so i'm keeping this as a footnote pretty much#but now that he's more comfortable in his body he's definitely enjoying that whole corner a lot more too and he's also very secure in that#department#and you can tell. like he has a certain devilish charm about him that was entirely repressed before he transitioned#big ole confident flirt
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Excerpt from the one where Kon meets pink kryptonite and decides to fuck Tim and his boyfriend about it.
(The read-more is definitely necessary, length-wise. I . . . got very into this idea and frankly this is barely a third of it so far, lol.)
"So, uh . . ." Kon says, skeptically eyeing the softly glowing rock in his hand. Metallo, like, threw it at his head. He has no idea why. "Is this supposed to do something or . . . ?"
"It's pink," Kara says leerily, staying very firmly back. Like, unexpectedly far back, in fact.
"Yeah, I'm not actually blind, thanks," Kon says, turning the rock over and squinting at it. It continues not to do anything, aside from the glowing thing.
"No, it's pink kryptonite," she stresses.
". . . it literally doesn't hurt at all, though?" Kon says. Though he probably should've figured it was some kind of kryptonite, given that Metallo had it and had apparently thought he could hurt him with it.
Seriously, though, his gloves are fingerless and he's got it right in his hand. It should be hurting him, if it's actually kryptonite.
"Pink kryptonite doesn't work like that," Kara says, edging a little farther back. They're floating a few hundred feet in the air right now, but from the way she's acting Kon's vaguely concerned that he might be about to explode or something. "It just affects our sexual . . . urges."
"Oh," Kon says, frowning in confusion. Weird, but . . . "Is that all?"
"I don't mean like it makes you horny, Kon, I mean like it makes you homosexual," Kara hisses, looking mortified. "And don't ask how I know, alright?!"
Kon . . . blinks.
"What the literal fuck?" he asks incredulously, just staring at her. "How does that even–are you telling me Metallo went and chucked gay kryptonite at me in the middle of a fight?"
"Yes!" Kara says, still clearly mortified. "So just–just stay over there with it until somebody shows up with a lead box, okay?! The effects will stop after we get it contained."
"Alright, alright. So then do you think the dude was flirting with me or is he just a fucking idiot?" Kon jokes, balancing the kryptonite on his index finger with his TTK. "Although I really don't think he'd be my type either way. Like, nothing against cyborgs in general, obviously, just the whole thing with him being a murderous supervillain who literally runs on kryptonite seems like it'd make us totally star-crossed. I want somebody I can actually commit to, you know?"
"Sure," Kara says, still eyeing the kryptonite with serious trepidation. It's really not helping Kon feel less like a time bomb, to be honest. Is there like some other side effect that he should be worrying about right now or something? Like, is he missing something here?
"You seem kinda high-strung about this," he observes, raising an eyebrow at her.
"Look, you'd have avoided it too if you'd dealt with it before!" she says protestingly. "So stay over there and definitely keep it away from Kal, I don't know if Jimmy ever really recovered from the last time."
"Oh, well, congrats to Jimmy, I guess," Kon says, since he can't really see a downside to scoring a one-night stand with Superman. Like, a downside for somebody who isn't literally his clone, he means. The clone thing would definitely make it weird.
Just it's also Clark, though, so he'd probably be the generous type in bed. Like, the sort to really take care of somebody. Be as gentle as happened to be appropriate but also be down if his partner maybe wanted it a little rough for whatever reason. And he'd definitely be able to go all night. Again, Kon isn't gonna go there himself, it really would be too weird, but he can make a logical conclusion. Extrapolate one. Whatever.
Then again he'd be down with Power Girl absolutely destroying him whenever the fuck she wanted to and she's genetically his . . . some form of cousin or something, he guesses. His half-cousin from another reality. So really, Clark's not even that weird an option. And like, all appearances aside Kon's a binary clone anyway, not even a one-for-one match, sooooo . . .
Actually it's probably weirder that he thinks Power Girl is so unspeakably hot but comparatively Kara is just . . . fine? Like, that's a little odd, isn't it?
Maybe it's an attitude thing. Or the costume.
Might be safe to blame the costume, yeah.
It's just such a good costume. Like, Kon aspires to reach that level of costume.
But really, all that aside he still doesn't even know what the big deal about temporarily going gay is, although to be fair he's also currently talking to Supergirl and not, like . . . literally any dude whatsoever. So like, who knows how weird this stuff might actually make him under those circumstances. Maybe it like fucks with inhibitions and stuff too?
Yeah, hell if he knows. He's really only dealt with green kryptonite before. He was vaguely aware that other colors existed and apparently did different stuff, but . . . this just seems very different, put it that way.
Maybe best to avoid Jimmy Olsen for a little while, Kon decides privately. The guy probably doesn't need that.
Besides, Clark apparently got there first anyway and Kon just really doesn't want to be worrying about measuring up. Miss him with that, thanks.
. . . although maybe he'll go visit Tim later.
Eh, no, Kara made it sound like the pink K's gonna stop affecting him pretty quick once they box it up, so not much point in bothering. Though maybe he'll visit just to hang, come to think of it; they haven't seen each other in almost a whole week. Well, he hasn't seen Tim, at least–who knows how much Bat-surveillance Tim's seen him through.
Kon should maybe sweep his room for bugs again. Note to self.
Although would it be weird to just like . . . keep the pink kryptonite, maybe? Since it apparently doesn't actually hurt anyone or anything? Because that could be, well . . . just interesting, that's all. Like, Kon is open to exploring that experience. Just–as an experience.
"Actually, you're surprisingly not high-strung about this," Kara says.
"Am I?" Kon asks. "I mean, it's not that big a deal, is it?"
She stares at him.
"Kon," she says slowly. "Pink kryptonite affects your sexuality. It makes you attracted to people you're not normally attracted to. It confuses you and everyone around you and it is really freaking embarrassing to explain afterwards."
"I've been mind-controlled into shaving my head and breaking my best friend's arm," Kon says, continuing to not really see what the big deal is. "That was embarrassing. And fucking traumatic. This? This is just kinda weird."
"Only kinda?" Kara asks incredulously. "You're one of the straightest guys I know! How are you just fine with this?!"
"I mean to be fair, that's probably making some unfair generalizations about straight guys," Kon points out. Kara stares at him. "What?"
"I don't even know how to respond to that," she says.
"Sorry?" Kon says, then tucks the pink kryptonite into his jacket pocket with a shrug. He's not trying to hide it or anything; just getting kinda sick of holding it. And it's that or he either ditches it somewhere or starts tossing it around and that'd probably be . . . just, well, absolutely epically stupid of him.
Or it seems like it would be, anyway. Whatever color it is, it's still kryptonite.
"I mentioned keeping that away from Kal, right?" Kara says.
"Yeah, on that note, are they like . . . done down there yet?" Kon asks, glancing down towards the mess of the street that Clark's standing on a few hundred feet below with a whole bunch of randos from S.T.A.R. Labs, for some reason. Somebody mentioned something about neutralizing Metallo's kryptonite heart without actually killing him, but mostly it was science talk and clearly theoretical anyway so to be honest Kon'd kinda tuned it all out as "not currently relevant", and that's all he knows.
"Definitely not," Kara says.
"I'm gonna call Robin while we're killing time, then," Kon says, pulling out his phone.
"You're going to call your closest male friend," Kara says. "Right now. While you've got pink kryptonite in your pocket."
"Yup," Kon says, already pulling up Tim's contact.
"Can you not see how that might be a bad idea at the moment?" Kara asks. "Not in any way whatsoever?"
"Well I'm not calling Impulse," Kon replies reasonably. Kara stares at him again, for some reason.
Eh, whatever.
He calls Tim.
"Hey, Conner, what's up?" Tim answers distractedly, which Kon doesn't hold against him because when isn't Tim distracted, really. Dude's got too much going on in that head of his, for real. He's just glad the guy ever picks up the phone at all.
"So apparently I'm gay right now," Kon greets conversationally, figuring he should lead with that just in case he actually is about to do something embarrassing to explain. "Pink kryptonite is fucking weird, man."
". . . uh," Tim says as Kara covers her face with her hands. "What?"
"Pink kryptonite makes you gay, Kara says," Kon says. "And we're both just kind of chilling above downtown Metropolis waiting for Kal to finish up with the science-y people so we can get said pink K locked up, so I'm bored out of my mind right now and calling you to complain about it."
"You're calling me," Tim says slowly. "While you're . . . gay."
"What, is he asking to come over?" another voice asks from the phone, sounding amused. It takes Kon a second to recognize it, but–oh yeah, that's the mysterious Bernard, isn't it?
Right, Tim has a boyfriend now. Kon's never actually met him on account of being the worst at secret identities and the whole thing that is Bernard living very firmly in Gotham, land of "no metas allowed unless you're either a supervillain or Batman's too dead to stop you", but he's heard him over the phone a couple times now, although they've never actually personally talked. So maybe thinking about Tim while being high on pink kryptonite isn't actually, like, kosher? Or polite. Or whatever.
. . . then again, Bernard did ask.
"I don't know, maybe?" Kon says thoughtfully, considering the idea. "Are you open to me coming over?"
"Yes," Bernard says.
"Bernard," Tim says.
"Babe, I know we're pretending I don't know you're an ass-kicking vigilante and all but come on, don't make me turn down Superboy," Bernard says wryly.
"We're–wait, pretending?!" Tim sputters.
"Pretending so, so hard," Bernard confirms, sounding nothing but fond. Kon's actually a little jealous of that tone of voice, he's gotta admit. Like–it's been a bit since anybody's talked to him that way, is all. "But like, if you actually thought you were being subtle maybe you shouldn't talk about kryptonite on the phone right in front of me or put themed emojis next to all your superfriends' civilian names in your contacts list?"
"Oh my god, you do that?!" Kon asks with a gleeful cackle, immediately forgetting everything else in favor of that absolutely delightful piece of information. "You're the worst! Batman just rolled over in his grave and Oracle is absolutely losing her shit on the other end of her wiretap!"
"B's not even dead right now," Tim says in exasperation. "And if O cared she'd have already hacked my phone and changed them. And for the record plenty of people put random superhero emojis next to their friends' names, that's a totally normal thing to do!"
"Usually the random superhero emojis aren't associated with contact pics that are dead fucking ringers for said superheroes," Bernard says, sounding amused again. "Just as a thing and all."
". . . anyway so you're gay today, how's that going for you, Conner?" Tim says as Bernard laughs gleefully in the background. "Triggering any unfortunate mental health crisises or anything? Making you worry about the validity of your masculinity? Because I can safely assure you that's all bullshit and you're fine."
"Naw, I know all that, being gay is just a thing," Kon says with a shrug. "Kara's being a little weird about it but honestly it's going way better than, like, the times supervillains mind-controlled me into being into them. Like just as an overall experience, I mean."
"Wait, how many times has that come up?" Tim asks in bemusement.
"I dunno?" Kon shrugs again. "I mean you were there for the Poison Ivy incident, and then Gorgeous Gilly happened to me a while later, which was, uh, genuinely horrifying because she tried to literally marry me during all that, so . . . I think just the twice, probably? But don't quote me on that, I don't even remember what I had for breakfast."
"And how is Kara being weird, exactly?" Tim says in his very unsubtle "assessing my teammate's psychological condition" voice.
"Oh, she's mostly just avoiding me?" Kon says, as a guy who's personally not really all that concerned with his psychological condition at the moment. "Because I've got the rock in my pocket on account of not wanting to just leave it lying around somewhere and she doesn't want to get affected by it. I don't know why, I don't really get why it matters."
"I mean it matters, definitely," Bernard says. "Like it very strongly matters to a lot of people."
"Fair, but I think we're all too invulnerable to really have to worry about getting gay-bashed or anything," Kon reasons. "Like, at least not as a heat of the moment thing."
". . . god can you imagine the world we would live in if every piece of shit gay-basher had to deal with the consequences of punching fucking Superman?" Bernard says feelingly. "For real."
"Oh, pink K's temporary," Kon clarifies. "Kal's not gay anymore."
"Hold up, I'm sorry, are you saying that at some point he was?" Bernard demands in obvious delight. "Is that what you're telling me right now?"
"I guess he was into redheads?" Kon says, tilting his head. "Slightly twinky redheads, specifically. Which I don't blame him for, I'm gonna be honest."
"Well now I know that forever, thanks," Tim says dryly.
"Alternate option: he could've been into Batman," Kon points out.
"Redheads it is," Tim says. "You just . . . redhead away over there."
"I mean I thought about it, kinda," Kon admits.
"Ngh," Tim says, for some reason.
"No thinking about Batman, though?" Bernard asks with a snicker.
"Not so much," Kon says, making a face. "Did consider having some Superman thoughts but I'm apparently not that narcissistic, surprisingly enough."
"Kon!" Kara chokes.
"Tell me you've never considered having Superman thoughts and I'll tell you you're a fucking liar," Kon snorts, shooting her a dry look. "Weren't you like totally naked when you first showed up on Earth? And then he found you like that and wrapped you up in his cape all nice and gentlemanly and took you home with him?"
"He is my baby cousin and you're being affected by pink kryptonite poisoning!" Kara accuses, her face bright red.
"Wait, is it actually poisoning me?" Kon says with a frown. "I feel like you should've led with it actually poisoning me, if that's actually a thing."
"Well no, not actually, it's physically harmless," Kara says grudgingly, folding her arms. "But you're still being affected! You're having Superman thoughts, of all things!"
"He just seems like he'd be considerate," Kon says reasonably. "Like, you know. Biblically."
"Ngh," Tim says, again for no apparent reason. Bernard sounds like he might be laughing. Or choking? Or maybe both; it's unclear.
"Please don't hit on Kal," Kara says. "Especially don't hit on Kal with pink kryptonite in your pocket. I don't want to know how that situation would end up."
"Ideally with him being considerate," Kon says. Tim chokes. Kara covers her face again.
"Does pink kryptonite affect your inhibitions too or are you just always like this?" Bernard asks curiously.
"Eh, pretty sure I'm just always like this, going by the things I've definitely still not been forgiven for saying to Power Girl," Kon says, idly tapping a finger against the side of his phone case. "Like, pretty damn sure at this point."
"That is unfortunately accurate," Tim agrees resignedly.
"So you're saying it is ethically okay to have Superboy over while he's gay," Bernard says in a promisingly speculative tone. Kon grins. Just a little, but yeah–definitely he grins. Kara grimaces, because she is absolutely no fun whatsoever.
Spoilsport.
"I did not in any way say that," Tim retorts dubiously.
"I mean that's what I heard, man, and I'm the one with super-hearing in this conversation," Kon says with a wider grin. "My inhibitions are all inhibited and my personal opinions of people are all the same, I'm just currently batting for the other team."
"So your normal opinion of me is that if you were gay, you'd come over," Tim says dryly.
"Yeah?" Kon says, raising an eyebrow. "I mean, obviously."
"How is that obvious?" Tim says.
"Because I already come over every time you let me," Kon reminds him.
"Oh yeah?" Bernard says slyly. "And how often does he let you come, exactly?"
"Not often enough," Kon replies honestly, and doesn't even bite at the obvious dumb sex joke Bernard so thoughtfully set up for him even though it is frankly painful not to.
"Ngh," Tim says. Kon continues not to understand the reason for him repeatedly making that same weird little noise, but whatever, he guesses. It's Tim, maybe he's stitching his own bullet wounds again or something. Guy's a multi-tasker like that.
"You know this would probably make for a fascinating case study about sexuality, actually," Bernard says musingly. "I mean, all I intend to do is abuse the situation to get into your very tight tights, but seriously, maybe we should all be taking notes or something."
"Ugh, hell no, Rob'll go full Bat if we let him do that," Kon snorts, then smirks. "He can take pictures, though, I know he's into that."
"Ngh," Tim says yet again, accompanied by a weird random "thump". If Kon didn't know better, he'd think he'd just fallen off a chair or something.
"Aw dammit, dude, I think I actually like you as a person now," Bernard says, sniggering. "Are you keeping the kryptonite? Please keep the kryptonite. Like, just for Valentine's and Tim's birthday, that's all I ask."
"Honestly don't know if Superman's gonna let me but I do kinda wanna," Kon admits. It seems pretty convenient, really. And definitely fun.
". . . and you're sure his inhibitions and opinions aren't being influenced in any way, Kara?" Tim asks suspiciously.
"He's really just like this, yeah," Kara says resignedly. "Well admittedly Kal spontaneously developed opinions on window treatments and used the word 'smashing' in cold blood when it happened to him, but that might've just been him sucking at flirting. Because he really does suck at flirting."
"What about when it was you?" Kon asks curiously.
"No one ever said it happened to me," Kara says.
"You kinda implied–"
"No one ever said it happened to me," Kara repeats, narrowing her eyes at him and doing an impressively bad job of acting like she's not blushing.
So it definitely happened to her, yeah.
"Okaaaaay, we'll pretend about that too then," Bernard says. "Well, what are your opinions on window treatments, Conner?"
"That I don't know what they are," Kon says.
"Sounds like he's in his right mind to me," Bernard says.
"He is absolutely not," Kara retorts dubiously.
"I really don't feel weird or anything, I swear," Kon tells her, since he still doesn't get the problem but also doesn't actually want to worry her either. "I don't even feel any different."
"Kon, you are hitting on your best friend and his boyfriend," Kara says. "Together. At once. Simultaneously, one might even say."
"You've met Wonder Girl and Arrowette before, right?" Kon says. "And both the Batgirls? And–"
"Oh my god, Kon," she cuts him off.
"Just saying," he says, then pauses for a moment and frowns consideringly. "Actually, question, how gay is this stuff making me, because while we're on the topic of threeways I kinda always wondered about what Starfire and Nightwing get up to together and if–"
"KON!" Kara yells, covering her ears.
"I'm just asking," he huffs.
"I don't know if it's actually possible to be gay enough to not be into Starfire," Bernard says musingly. "Like I can't imagine how it ever could be."
"Right?" Kon says.
"It's possible to not be into Starfire," Tim says. "Like, theoretically. Asexuals and aromantics both exist, for one."
"Do they?" Kon says doubtfully. "Like in general, sure, but when around specifically Starfire?"
". . . I can't technically prove you wrong due to a lack of reliable evidence but still," Tim says. "The possibility is there. If nothing else the multiverse is a thing."
"Last time I saw her she was wearing half a gold lamé bikini and I am not going to tell you which half or define how loosely I am using the term 'wearing'," Kon says.
"I said it's possible, not probable," Tim says.
"What about you, man, are you the gold lamé type?" Bernard asks with a teasing snicker. "Just while you're gay and all, of course. That's like, practically a cultural thing. Gotta be authentic to the experience, yeah?"
"That is in no way whatsoever a cultural thing, babe," Tim says dubiously.
"Please, like I've never worn freaking lamé," Kon scoffs. "I've worn collars and loincloths and leather and crop tops and enough unnecessary belts to tie up a Bat, lamé is nothing."
"Collars and . . . loincloths?" Bernard repeats, sounding confused.
"Yeah, this one time I crash-landed on a lost isle of beast-men and they kidnapped and enslaved me for a few months," Kon explains, waving a hand distractedly. "Frankly I count myself lucky they even let me have the collar, much less the loincloth."
". . . um," Bernard says.
"You, uh, never mentioned the collar part of that story before, Kon," Tim says, clearing his throat. "You very definitely never mentioned the collar part of that story before."
"Oh yeah, the prince kinda kept me as his pet for a little bit?" Kon tells him with an easy shrug. "Like he and all his buddies ganged up on me and then took me home with them, but I was kinda . . . feral, I guess? Technically? So like, collar and chain setup. But he was cool, he took real good care of me."
"Ngh," Tim says just barely faintly.
"Yeah you should definitely come over," Bernard says. "Tim, get the check. Conner, exactly how super is your super-speed?"
"You can just call me Kon," Kon says. "And . . . mach 3, last I clocked it?"
"Isn't that like two thousand miles per hour?" Bernard asks.
"Two thousand two hundred and twenty-three point three," Kon replies with a pleased smirk. "Faster than a speeding bullet. Or so they tell me."
"We'll just meet you at Tim's, how's that," Bernard says. "That work for you, Kon?"
"That works for me, Bernard," Kon confirms, smirking wider.
"Oh my god, Kon, you cannot possibly be serious right now," Kara says in exasperation, rubbing at her temples. "Just because you're temporarily gay doesn't mean you should do anything about it!"
"I mean, I'm feeling pretty serious?" Kon says, shrugging again. He still doesn't get why she's being so sensitive about this. "It's not like this is the weirdest thing I've ever done in pursuit of a good time. Like, holy hell, lemme tell you about the Ravers sometime."
"You're going to have to look Robin in the eye after this!" Kara says. "And work with him! And be a normal person in his presence! Normally!"
"I'm aware?" Kon says, vaguely bemused by her concern. Like he's never been normal around somebody he's slept with before, geez. "Tell Kal I ran off with the pink K, if he wants to lock it up in the Fortress or wherever I can bring it back tomorrow."
"Maybe Monday," Bernard says.
"Or maybe Monday," Kon amends.
"It's Thursday!" Kara sputters.
"So it's a long weekend," Bernard says.
"I'm not explaining this to Kal," Kara says. "I'm not explaining this to Batman."
"I really don't see why you'd have to," Kon says. "Rob, you cool with the long weekend thing? Not too much of an imposition?"
". . . I got the check," Tim mutters in obvious and absolute mortification.
Kon's gonna take that as a "yes".
"Cool," he says, grinning broadly. "See you soon, Boy Wonder."
He ends the call. Kara drags her hands down her face and continues to stay very far away from him and the pink kryptonite in his pocket.
"When you go back to normal and freak out and make everything weird with Robin and your team and even Robin's literal boyfriend, I'm going to say so many 'I told you so's," she swears vehemently. "So don't say I didn't warn you."
"Your objection is on the record," Kon says, then tosses her a lazy salute with another grin and takes off, kryptonite and all.
Best to just scarper while Clark's distracted, yeah?
Definitely best.
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Djsjdjjd the monster fuckers are hungry 👀 👀 👀Love to see so many people like the ideas and git some if there own! Gonna number each of these and give me thoughts for each one.
I can't believe I didn't think about Rollo but yes definitely a human trying to "save" Yuu from monsters. Your ask got me thinking and now my priest kink came to mind cause just imagine Rollo is the priest for a church in a small village with Yuu being maybe like the black sheep of the village. Rollo wants to "save" because Yuu 1) is a witch (with Grim as their familiar) or potion maker 2) they often go to the neighboring village filled with monsters 3) if Rollo saves them then Yuu would be indebted and would have to marry him 👀. I'm just imaging him is a cassock and it's making me feel things. I could do the classic seducing a priest during confessional fic but there's a lot of depends. I really love the idea of Yuu taking Rollo's virginity but an idea I love more is Yuu and Malleus both fucking Rollo like a Rollo sandwich of him fucking Yuu and Malleus fuckijg both Yuu and Rollo because double decker dick.
I love slimes for all the sexual shenanigans you can do with them that I think work well for Cater. As a slime, he can make copies of himself like his unique magic so multiple Cater's to fuck. And that's just the tip of the iceberg. Cater, as a slime, can squeeze into a lot of places fully or leave small parts of himself behind. For the voyeur side, he can leave a little bit of his slime in your home that watches you undress, bathe, pleasure yourself, or pleasure others even. He could also make himself a pseudo ovipositior and leave little eggs, which are just a part of him, inside you. He has complete control of the little slimes so his "eggs" can move around while inside you. You could also be inside of him. Like his body can almost act like a blanket or restraint that was around you as he fills your holes. He can also kinda shape-shift and have whatever and any number of parts he wants. What I'm debating about Cater is if he's translucent or not or both. I'm probably gonna go with him being a translucent pink color naturally but can change colors and opacity so he can turn into other people at least look wise.
I love Riddle centaur! Show horse having to be all proper and formal but he turns to mush around Yuu. One if my favorite centaur tropes I think works very well for Riddle, has a biner but can't reach. Whenever he gets horny he can't do anything about it! He's never been able to touch himself :( I don't have an order of who Yuu will fuck but I do know for Riddle that his first time with Yuu is gonna be because they take pity of the poor centaur, cock dripping and balls heavy with no release.
Bunny Deuce I think is so cute and works so well for him, and, yes, he fucks like a rabbit. He totally hooks his arms around your torso and apologizes as he ruts into you. He's sorry he can't stop you just feel too good! Or maybe he's ridding you reverse cowgirl and you see his little tail wiggling as he cums 🤤. The thing I'm not sure about with Deuce or with a number of the monster au guys is if I want to go the hybrid route (basically human with animal ears and limbs) or or full fantasy furry kinda deal (kinda like a classic minotaur but different animal heads and other traits)
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okay so a large part of my issue with halsin is that his character feels inconsistent, right. like larian wanted him to be a wise older man mentor character but then they wanted him to be fuckable, and they wanted him to be a nontraditional/nonmonogamous romance, so they made him sexually experienced and confident and casual, but he's also a romance option, so he talks about having Feelings for the player character. and then he needed to be a quest-giver, so he needed to ask for help. and what we ended up with is "guy who up and abandoned his responsibilities at the first chance of adventure, got captured and needed rescuing, makes all sorts of comments about his sexual experience but loses all self control and wildshapes at the first glimpse of ass, tells you he has feelings for you to get you in bed then leaves at the end of the game, and makes inappropriately sexual comments abt the sexual abuse victim if you're romancing him" - all of which reads as an uncomfortable, unlikeable mess of a guy.
halsin suffers from a lack of focus - he's neither a full romance on the level of the origin companions, nor is he a fling or sub-romance; he got more care and attention than wyll, in some ways, but the writing is flaky and weak and makes him look, frankly, like an incompetent, immature manchild. the bear scene is grossly pubescent (it should've been player choice to initiate that, not have it dropped on you that if he gets too horny there's a risk he'll CAST A SPELL and turn into a literal animal. by mistake. and if that's his reaction to seeing tits what's gonna happen when he cums) and the way he pushes for astarion to join you if you tell him you're in a relationship feels wildly inappropriate.
I know halsin has a history of sexual abuse himself (and I've seen good analyses/critiques of the way that's handled) but again I find it weird that finding out about that is locked behind not just a sex scene but a threesome+ scene - the writers really wanted to drive home that This Guy Fucks to the point where he comes across as pushy, and his trauma is reduced to background noise in a scene where he is essentially a sex object. he is simultaneously objectified by the writers, and in-universe by himself and those around him, but instead of exploring that we're just supposed to go with it; likewise, his lack of commitment and emotional immaturity aren't problems in and of themselves, but it feels like the writers aren't aware that that's the character they've written, and so these things are never appropriately addressed, and his arc and romance don't match up with the other characters' stories about growth and development.
not rly sure where I'm going with this, but it bothers me!! I think it's a nasty mix of the writers' intentions at a cross purpose with the push for fanservice, and the whole thing leaves a sour taste in my mouth t b h.
#ig I wish they'd diverted more of those resources to wyll and left halsin as a simple fling option or smth#I have many meaner things I could say about him but this post isn't about that#it kinda makes me sad. scarred up beefy older elf man should've been my guy but instead I kind of can't stand him:/#this post was much longer with fix its but I cut them out bc I got bored lol#bg3#and like. I wish they'd treated him Better he makes me uncomfortable and I find it difficult to empathise with him but. yeah he should've#got more development and better treatment
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☆Some random ass prompts☆
Feel free to change the pronouns and stuff! Feel free to credit me or something, I don't really care???? Just make sure to claim them as your own.
Also maybe '@' me if you use these! I wanna see what y'all do!<3
"Who said you can have her? If you want her, you'll have to go through me!" "...disappointing but fine."
A is pregnant and B is dead. How is B dead? Who knows? However A is stressed and is still grieving for B. How does the child birth go? Who knows? All up to you.
B invites A to a midnight dinner to discuss some important matters and just what are these important matters that got A all horrified and shocked?
"Hmm...I guess it could work, but will it really?" "I don't know, I'm just going with my gut here." ".....we're all gonna die....."
"I will bite you!" "Oh fuck you!" "...the sexual tension between those two is unreal holy fuck.."
"Hey mama? What's papa doing?" "Your father is being stupid but at this point, I'm used to it." "Is that how you guys met? Him being silly?" "Haha, yes little one. Indeed so."
A is a bit chaotically unhinged and B is a tired workaholic that wants A to calm down for a second so B can confess their feelings to A.
A and B are dating and are planning on getting married very soon, however, C has been feeling very lonely since the two first started dated so they want to join in on the relationship but aren't sure how to bring it up to the two without sounding creepy or awkward or desperate.
C and B are snuggling and A joins in on the snuggling session. Poly ships go brrr!!!
^^^ "Who knew A can be this affectionate when snuggling, huh?" "Haha yeah." "I can hear you y'know? So shut up and let me enjoy this."
Smut prompts! (Read at your own risk)
"Mmm..that's it baby~ just moan for me and me only~"
"Aww~ you're so cute. Do you want your daddy to give you a reward for being such a good girl?~"
"Me. You. Bed. Now."
"Oh? You like it when I bite? Why didn't you say so sooner?"
A is horny as fuck and is usually the dominant one in the relationship but tonight B is horny as fuck and decides to show A how much of a dominant person they really can be.
^^^ A is so into that shit.
B wants to spend quality type with A privately but A is always at work so when they finally have a day off, B had decorated the room to "set the mood". Does A like it or not? All up to you.
B's boss comes to visit B and A, however, he ends up flirting with A while B is fuming with jealousy. However, B easily scoops A and starts aggressively making out with A to prove and show B's boss that A belongs to them only.
"I will fuck you so hard that you won't be able to walk for a few months! Understand?" "Mm kinky. Why not do it right here and now then babe?~"
"What the fuck are you?" "I'm a sex worker." "..oh-" "Got a problem with that?" "No...but can you fuck me?" "Heh, if that's what you want~"
Yandere prompts!
"You belong to me only darling!"
A shy innocent looking yandere x A tired asf college student
"Aww,,you're so cute and gorgeous when you are all dolled up like this! What's the occasion? You aren't going with that BITCH are you?"
"I love you! I love you! I love you! Wait- hold on- why aren't you saying it back? You do love me back right?" "O- Of course! I lo- I love you too." "Yay! But why are you crying? Who hurt you?!"
A emotionless yandere x A bright sunshine
A is a yandere and practically forced B into a relationship with them by using their secrets and loved ones against them. B is absolutely fucking miserable and probably beyond broken and saving (emotionally wise)
A werewolf yandere x A vampire
"Whoever said you can't leave? You can leave but all you gotta do is tell me where you're going on what day and at what time! Okay love?"
"No! You must stay with me! It's the only way that I can be truly happy! Please! I'm begging you! I love--no--I - I must love you!"
"I promise I'll always be with you but...you gave me no choice, I had to. I had to protect you from him. I'm sorry my love."
#otp prompts#fluff prompts#vibe prompts#star prompts#random prompts#prompt batch 1#enemies to lovers prompts#angst prompts#smut prompts#polyamourous#poly prompts#imagine your otp#yandere prompts#original character#original prompts
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lati what are your opinions on ebenholz . i'm having the biggest goat cock brainrot
so unfortunately i don't have our resident goat boy since i was absent from arknights during his banner :(( i've heard that he's pretty useful in dealing with elite/boss enemies, but he's also pretty tricky to use in regular combat like other operators.
horni wise, you can't fucking convince me that ebenholz wouldn't have a thing for fingering. he abuses your sensitive walls, curling and scissoring his fingers to stretch you out while ignoring each of your pleas for mercy. and of course he's edging you, building you right up to a climax only to tear it away from you at the last moment. and he has the nerve to tell you to keep your voice down, making sure to really dig his padded fingertips into your sweet spots as he's saying that. ebenholz has a bit of a mean streak to him :((
yes, you can grab his horns when he's in between your legs for stability. he's gonna grunt and give you a look, but he won't really do much to stop you. ebenholz lowkey finds it arousing that you have to grip onto his horns of all things just because he's making you feel that good. and he curses under his breath when he's got his dick inside you, hissing a quick "scheiße, so eng!" here and a "So verdammt gut" there.
also i'm so sure that i'll get thirsts about this bc y'all are nasty, but yes, male goats go into rut. they act weird for the does attention, especially when they smell a doe in heat. does will also do a thing called "standing heat," which is when the doe stands still so a buck can breed with her. take this information and imagine a very horny ebenholz who wants to fuck you standing up and do with it what you will.
#lati thirsts#arknights x reader#arknights smut#ebenholz x reader#ebenholz smut#i had to look up how goats do the nasty this is on ur hands anon
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Here I'll ramble about my favorite games this year.
This sure was a good year, and I have better opinions than the game awards do so I'm just gonna talk into the ether for a bit here.
Once upon a time I liked D&D 5e quite a bit, just like everyone else on this god forsaken internet. In recent years I've been more interested in Pathfinder 2e and Lancer. After so many years rolling with 5e, it became a bit more refreshing to try systems with more specific and rigid rules for certain things. However, a videogame requires specific adherence to rules to function, and in this respect, Baldur's Gate 3 is an incredible adaptation of the system.
There's just so much stupid bullshit you're allowed to get away with in game that most devs would not even consider. I may have played thru act 1 like 7 times now and it's still entertaining. Also I went from hating Lae'zel to loving her. Congrats Larian, you made me like perhaps the most annoying person I've ever met in a videogame.
As my bones start to deteriorate I find myself seeking smaller, more intimate games that give a sort of feeling. Lunacid is "like" Kingsfield in the way that it's a first-person dungeon crawler. That's where the buck stops for that comparison gameplay wise. However, Lunacid offers an extremely specific feeling I find is rare in games. It's the same sort of "you're lost and alone but also it's also groovy" feel as Metroid Prime 1 & 2. And if you can capture the same sort of feeling that some of my favorite games ever gave me as a teenager, you're just automatically on my games of the year list.
I saw a gameplay video in passing on twitter, got slightly horny because caked-up goat lady, went to the steam page and saw OVERWHEMINGLY POSITIVE.
I don't think my experience with Pseudoregalia is unique. It just feels great to jump around and the music slaps.
Cross the feeling of the open-sea adventure of Wind Waker, with the chase and collection of fishing minigames of countless other titles, and the dread of exploring the uncaring unknown. It scratches a seldom-scratched itch of exploratory joy within an indifferent universe.
Dredge's systems can be distilled to the simple loop of growing beyond your own fears to discover more and more. None of these fears is particularly intense, but it's enough.
Dredge isn't going to find itself on game of the year lists because it's doing any one thing particularly well. It's also not doing anything specifically or wholly NEW.
It is however, more than the sum of it's parts, and it is beautiful.
Remnant 2 is the best co-op souls-style game that exists, tied with Nioh 2. That's it, that's what I had to say. It just real good and it deserves to be on game of the year lists.
So like, late this year, 2 Souls successors came out. Lies of P and Lords of the Fallen. And goddamn did Lords inspire division.
I think these releases really showed that people who are "Souls Fans" really cover a LOT of different specific interests, and not all of these interests are well-represented in every souls-like. Lords, perhaps amazingly, seems to cater to what I particularly want out of a Souls game, whereas Lies of P did not.
I like these games for their challenge, sure, but more importantly, I like the character building. The ability to create a unique playstyle that I can take on the game with. This slowly grated on me in Lies of P because the game really only wants you to play it (and succeed at it) a certain way. Because the perfect parry was the truest answer to everything a boss could throw at you, and the dodge sucks ass, I felt more exhausted by the end of the game than anything. I also wanted to try a strength build, but the heaviest weapons cannot manage to fully wind up and land a hit on any bosses past the halfway point. Without any hyper-armor or poise, the "big weapon" playstyle felt completely trash, even outside of bosses.
Lords lets me dodge, block, perfect parry, and hey they ALL feel useful. I can actually wind up big weapon hits too! Yeah it feels a bit floaty, and yeah enemy density can be rather crazy at times, but I'm the weirdo who's favorite Dark Souls is DS2. Lords also does ranged combat better than any of it's contemporaries.
I think a lot of people also never played the original Lords of the Fallen. Now that game SUCKED. I played the whole thing, my god.
GAME OF THE YEAR BAYBEE
I've already talked about AC6, but again, you can't just get me to complete a game. I see an achievement list and I say "fuck that, I hate that!"
I saw AC6's Achievement list and I was rubbing my hands together like a cartoon villain. Like Pseudoregalia, AC6 just feels good to play. It feels so tight, and after a few hours you can feel the minute changes in the way your mech handles even after small part swaps.
Anyways it needs DLC with more Rusty content. 12/10.
#goty 2023#games of the year#baldur's gate 3#armored core#armored core vi#fires of rubicon#pseudoregalia#Dredge#Lunacid#Remnant 2#lords of the fallen#croxotwords
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I have a passing knowledge of Jaime Reyes' Blue Beetle from the character's appearance on SMALLVILLE, BATMAN: THE BRAVE AND THE BOLD and these panels.
Milagro, you are so real for this.
And this is where my true knowledge about Blue Beetle comes from - Ted Kord's Blue Beetle and his friendship with Booster Gold.
Blue & Gold Forever.
So with only knowing the bare minimum about Jaime I was able to watch BLUE BEETLE with no expectations. It's an incredibly vibrant, fun and heartfelt film. I'm concerned at its low box-office showing, but films with bigger leads and bigger budgets have also failed at the box office, or at the very least, didn't recoup it's budget and marketing. There has never been anything that was a guaranteed box office success. I would rather it tried to get eyes in theaters than get lost on HBO Max where it was originally slated for release. Here's hoping National Cinema Day on Aug 27th (where theaters are selling tickets for $4 for all formats) will bring more people to the tent.
Too true.
My thoughts on BLUE BEETLE
Nothing but SPOILERS.
THE GOOD
Xolo Maridueña (COBRA KAI) is a great Jaime. If you have seen Maridueña across these five seasons of COBRA KAI, it's not surprising. He has shown consistently that he can play humour, dutifulness, vulnerable and excel at action.
Big up to COBRA KAI's annual blow-out fight sequence.
youtube
Oddly enough, at the end of the film I didn't think we got to know Jaime beyond a cursory level, but I'm sure if they did a deep dive on him I would complain about that too as my issue with origin story films is that so much real estate is given to building up the history of the character, that the plot and action seems relegated to the final act. But I guess BLUE BEETLE gave us all we need to know about Jaime.
Good egg, duty bound, gets hard from hugs (and kudos to this film for actually having a character who gets horny. Comic book films are nearly always a sexless thing, but my guy Jaime pulling his shirt down to cover his crotch after Jenny's (Bruna Marquezine) tale of woe was refreshing.)
-Really liked Jenny Kord. She wasn't the typical damsel in distress. She's formidable in her own right. She and Jaime doesn't feel rushed or shoehorned in. I especially loved the fact that they didn't just make her the love interest,
Though she and Xolo are great together,
but also gave her - in the Reyes - a new family. If she and Jaime were to go pear-shaped we can just know that Jenny still has a place within the Reyes clan.
-We have not one, but two new members to the Legion of Great DCEU Family Members. Joining the mom and dad of SHAZAM, AQUAMAN's dad, THE FLASH's mom is BLUE BEETLE's Alberto Reyes (Damián Alcázar) and Nana Reyes (the Oscar nominated Adriana Barraza).
Still waters run deep and Nana proved that. She's not just up in her room sewing and watching reruns of "María la del Barrio". She is sitting back waiting to showcase her experiene while fighting in the revolution.
And Alberto Reyes! He was this film's King T'Chaka. Always with a wise word, strong, caring. I hate that he had to die and I think it's a worn out trope that a hero has to suffer loss in order to come into their greatness, but it worked. Long Live Alberto Reyes!
Just enough George Lopez to not be annoying. He's funny, but only in small doses IMO so he was just good enough and used well enough that it wasn't eye-rolling. I really loved that he wasn't just there for the obvious comic relief, instead Uncle Rudy is a brain.
The opening along had me hyped. It set the tone and it lent to idea of the scarab being from space, but the inclusion of a classic Blue Beetle comic sketch just ::chef's kiss:
-Director Ángel Manuel Soto listed which stories he pulled from for this film,
but I see a lot of BATMAN: THE BRAVE AND THE BOLD episode "Fall of the Blue Beetle" in the bits where they go to Ted Kord's home/lab.
-The way they took OMAC/Kevin Kho backstory and merged it with Carapex's. In the comics OMAC was a Cambodian child of war, in this film Ignacio/Carapex was left an orphan and trained by the School of the Americas (rebranded Western Hemisphere Institute for Security Cooperation) whose training manuals advocated tortuing and blackmailing civilians. Using Kord Industries as not just a amorphous shady big tech corp, BLUE BEETLE's writer Gareth Dunnet-Alcocer and Soto tied Kord Industries to the realties of what big corporations are doing globally.
This ties into another thing I loved about the film - it had a strong cultural identity. From Nana using Vivaporú (Vicks Vapor Rub) as smelling salts to rouse Jamie, to El Chapulín Colorado(!!!).
The idea of gentrification that affects people across colour lines and specifically targets people of lower income.
The full integration of Jaime and Khaji-Da being exemplified by Khaji-Da (voiced by singer/actor Becky G) speaking Spanish.
THE BAD
-Is there someone with less screen prescence than Susan Sarandon? I don't know how she was ever a thing. I guess they needed a "name" but there several other actors like Anjelica Huston or Sigourney Weaver who would have done something more with that role. Carla Gugino. Anyone else!
-The establishing CGI of Kord Entrerprises was basura. There was a tangible change in F/X as if mid way through post-production they found out WB-Discovery was moving it to theatrical release and they effects crew got a cash infusion.
-While I came around on the character towards the end, I wasn't a fan of Milagro. Glad they aged her up but she fell into the trope of annoying movie sibling and it grated.
THE REST
-Harvey Guillen's character died in the film (good!) and he appears to be dead again on HARLEY QUINN (not good. There is no way Nightwing's death sticks).
-Soto and James Gunn says that Jaime has a future in the DCU. While an interview snippet is making the rounds where Soto says he would like Jason Sudeikis (TED LASSO) to play Ted Kord, I don't really believe that is true as the source is from an online site I'm not familiar with and people lie for clicks.
Yes, Buster. All. The. Time.
-While comics! Jaime lives in El Paso, Texas, film! Jaime lives in Palmera City - on El Paso St. - which was created for the film (and appeared in the comics months ahead in a tie-in). Soto found inspiration in Texas, Florida, and Puerto Rico. But I wonder what Palmera City's real-world city will be when James Gunn finishes the DC Map that he say is being redone. Maybe because over the years Metropolis has been Chicago/Delaware/New York.
Metropolis is not in Delaware, GTFOH.
#Youtube#blue beetle#blue beetle movie#blue beetle 2023#jaime reyes#xolo maridueña#angel manuel soto#dc comics#comic book movies#movies#film#dcu#wb/dc#harvey guillen#bruna marquezine#spoilers
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As one of the leading minds on women and lesbianism, I would like your perspective on a query that has been lurking in the back of my mind. The question in question is, "Why do we as a society like boobs?" There shouldn't be any instinctive reasons for males to find that specific part instinctively attractive, they are not a reproductive organ, and on that note we lesbians, who defy the general understanding of nature, have no real reason to either. I mean, we got boobs, but it is not the same. Like, is there a scientific reason for society's adoration, of boobs, or is it as simple as neuron activation? I have a couple of theories. One could be something along the lines of being a good candidate as a potential mother, but that only makes sense for men, and I refuse to believe that lesbians are just mimicking the behavior of straight men for no real reason. There is something that connects us all to boobs... Maybe we are drawn to them instinctively as one of the first comforts of life, I'm not sure. That is why I beseech you, the ultimate woman-rizzler and diagnoser of kinks. Your standing in this community speaks volumes. So tell me, oh, wise one... Why do you think society is so fixated on boobs?
going to tell you all now this might he a bit long hecause i get sidrtracked really easily since i get excited taljing ahout kinks, also i willl ve talking ahoit kinks thats obvious enough. another importajt detail ! whikst i havr dobe so much resrarch on this using like full on books by professionals and reading professional scientific shit, there is not much at all of "why we are sexuallly attracted to this" so im basing this off what i have learned and using the information i have to write my own theories alsi i dont know neuron activation shit so maybe thats a reason idonrknow i jsut knoe ahout horny people !!! i hope you enjly my rambling ling ass answrt anyways 👍❤️
going to give you all alittle fun fact that the sexual attraction to boobs is called mazophilia, and it is a type of partialism ! a partialism is type of kink that falld under the category ot sexaul attractooj to body parts tjat arr not the geniitald, likr hands and feet anf legs anr all sorts of stuff ! i love explainining that to people ..
whilst i dont exactly know why liking tits is such like a huge common thing for peoplex because not much information and like reseatch goes into "why people like common body parts" i will use all the things i know to try and find a reason ! its crazy to me how people think that we must like something because of like evolution or because they are part of life or whatever, a foot fetish is literally the most common partialism like its so popular, and ehat donfeet do ???? nothing .. but people go horny over that shit !!! like the look of them, what they can do to them, and like even accessories !!! like painted toenails or toe rings or things of the sorts (tht is called clothes fetishism bytheway, srxual attracion to specific type of clothes and all that stuff basically)
thats ejough ahoit foot fetishes, back to tits ! i think that people simply like tits becaude of many different reasons honestly, most people like the way they look and see them in a sexual way, its really that simple !!! most fetishes start during puberty (and no kinks are NOT hereditary, yes your parents CAN influence your kinks during your childhood like if your parents smoked you are more likely to have capnolagnia, a smoking fetish, but kinkd are absolutely not hereditary and there are severeal reasons they can develop, like your childhood (also another small little fun fact most people who are into abasiophilia, which is sexual attraction to peoplr with impaired mobility, are adults whp were childten or young when there was that thing where polio was extrmely common and led people to wear orthopedic things ans that developed into these people being srxually attracted to it due to frequent exposue to it in their childhood) and also just as you grow up ypu will most likley find more things sexually attractive)
i feel like i keep on gping complly off topic becaude i grt excited to sprinkle in facts avout kinks so now im going to give the reasons why i think a lot of people are into tits
first reason, exposure to it our whole lives. as a society, tits are like shown as sexual and attractive, mosr shows or movies or even games you play have women with tits that are the focus and are mesnt to be sexually attractive. whilst as a child you would not think that because the shows you shpuld he watching would not have that focus point on breasts qs being attractive, as you get older, you would. if you look at any anime that is pg 13, it will have women who have big breasts that jiggle or are in provocatuve outfits that dhow them off on purpose, and even the other people in yhe show see it as attractive and start blushing seeing it. because of this being so common in most things from even such an early age, most peoppe will find tits attractive. to sum it down, a lot of media shows tits as being attractive and makes them the focus of attraction. its the samr way like a leg fetish show would make the legs the focus of sexual attraction, do you understabd ? (another little fun fact, thisbis also how many fetishes and kinks come to be, to bring up again capnolagnia its why many women in the past wete attracted to men that smokd because most peoppe did and it was so fommon and everywhere that it became attractve. compared to now, many less people smoke and its not seen as hot to most people anymore, society and media has a huge influence on fetishes abd kinks)
second reason, ut kind of links on with the first reason. most peopoe like tits, the people who like tits will talk about liking tits, resulting in more shows and stuff that have tits be hot, that soreads even more, more peoppe see that stuff and go yeah thats hot, and becaude its so common and so normal in society by so kany people, that mindwrt thing will go and be like okay ! i gyess that is hot ! its like youre influenced in a way ?
third reason, they literally just look nice, im attracted to womens backs for no other reason then yeah ! theyre nice ! theyre hot to me, and im so sure that goes for so many other people who just look at body parts and go yeah alright that fucks im into that, sometimes it really is as simple as that (also, sone peoppe are attracted to tits in specific clothing or with piercings and stuff, thats back to clothes fetishosm !!!). a lot of women are attracted to hands, why ? because of the defined details, like veins or that theyre rough or maybe even that they have long fingers, which brings me to my next point, imagingig what you can do to them or what tjey can do to you
fourth reason, the image if seeing tits and not liking them on thwir own, but imagoning ehat you fould do to them or what they could do to you. im going to hring up cheirophilia, whoch is the sexual attraction to hands. i think this is a good example because men AND women like hands (althoufh womej usually more, but why ? usually because of the masculinity shown theoifh the arms and hande like arm hair, rough hands, big hands, veins, or some cuts that show they do manuap labour whoch is usually a masculine thing, this is anther reason ill brinf uo for liking tits in my next reason) hands can be used for fingering for women whoch is what msot womej enjoy yhe most as it provides clit stumulation and also feels nicer (for a lotx but nt all peoppe with vaginas as they are all different) whilst for men thwy can see it as oh ! handjobs (whilstt men enjly handjlbs, most peoppe with dicks enjoy penetration which is why i think that men do not have as much srxuak attraction to hands as womej do, differenr erogenous zones that can he touched and stuff) so what do tita have to do with this ? peoplr will see tits and might think "oh, tits have nipples, and i wsnt to suck on nipples", or "i want to cum on those tits" or simply want to feel tuem up. that could also be why peoppe are attracyed to tits because they aant to do things to them and the umage of doing those things to the tits is erotic !
fifth reason, im bringing back the point i made before about women beong peoppe who are more into hands than men because it shows masculinity. tits udually are soemthong that dhows femininity or whatever the fucking word is, tbeyre feminine most commonly and are usully seen that way. people who are attracted to womeh will usually see tits and like rhem because they are feminine ! some people like bigger tits becwuse it means tbwy are more feminine (most commonly men i think who prefer bigger tits, becaude smaller tits are seen as "not feminine enough", but not all men and not al people who orefer bkgger tits think like this) butny yes, i think that peoole who are into women are also into tits because they usually show femininity !!
sixth reason, and this might be specific but its a reason i think more so .. girla would have ? none of this is scientofically prov4n, these arenall just my own theories based on my own resesrch on diffetent topics so youknkw take this as you will ! but, for this, i think women are more likely to he into thos (and also some men) but tits may show dominance. for me, i like bigger titw because they seen to mske peope look bigger, and i likr bigger people becaude they look more dominant to me and in power. its the same aswith height, but insteasnits size. some people may like tits because it shows domincance or something like that. i mean really, think ahout it, most peope who see a woman with big tits go "god i want her to literally smother me until i run out of breath and fie with tyose tits" and i think thts sayibg sometihing and it shows to me that some poppe are attracted to big tits because it shows domincance !!!
that was really long, but i think these are the reasons why a lot of people like tits. no kink or srxual attracyion will ever he as simple as only having ome reason why everyone likes it. also, i think the evplution theory is stupid like i undersand its scientific bit wyo the fuxk sees a womah with big tits and goes "oh she will make a perfecr moter she has chikd bearing breasts !!!" thats fuxjing atupud peppe are just horny and thats okay indomt care if that theory is scientific or whatever the fuck i like pussy and i dont have that inpregnate gene evolved in me i just lke it because its fucking hot !!!!
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No Not Nolan's Year in Review
Apparently this is a tradition now, so-- here are the stories of 2023, ranked by the number of likes. It also helps keep me a bit grounded-- it feels rough when recent stories don't pick up stream, but the year as a whole has still gone quite well. It's also nice to see where all of my work falls, note-wise. And if you're feeling very nostalgic (or horny?) here is a link to 2021, and here is a link to 2022.
I'm leaving the eBook announcement posts out of my year end review, but I'm calling it out for myself so when I revisit this in December 2024, future-me will remember to grab those. I'm not planning to abandon this account anytime soon-- and I'm certainly not shifting to Patreon or PayPal or what have you. I'm not prolific or popular enough for any of that. The vast majority of my work will continue to remain free and open. I just wanted to prove to myself that I'm good enough of a writer to publish something that I can be proud of-- I have, and I am.
Do authors love notes and reblogs? Yes. But they often enjoy hearing direct feedback even more-- I know I sure do. Consider "messaging authors directly" as a New Year's Resolution. (Please note that begging for someone to write you a story is not feedback. Don't be that guy.)
12) Green Grass - 122 notes - December 2023
Two guys learn first hand that not everyone values the same things. Concise and straightforward.
11) Soul Stones: Long Distance - 192 notes - April 2023
A romantic story of two men using the power of body swapping to close the gap on a long distance relationship. Cell phones have nothing on being there in person.
10) Colony Freedom - 197 notes - September 2023
A slime alien attempts to rebuild its colony from the ground up after its overseers have completely vanished. Can it manage to find enough hosts for its family, or will its cover be ruined?
9) Cuerpo Inc: After Hours Perk - 249 notes - July 2023
Ethan tries to pretend to be Jake for the weekend, but he wasn't counting on Jake's nosy neighbor getting But if he can't be Jake, at least he can still have fun in Jake's body.
8) Summer Break Dullahans - 252 notes - June 2023
Eric was not expecting to find Ben's detached head in the dorms. I'm a big fan of detachable limb stories, so I decided to be a part of the change I want to see. (I'm also very rusty at GIMP / photoshop, but it gets the job done.)
7) The Great Gym Shift - 275 notes - August 2023
A version of The Great Shift, but with a limited radius. A gym instructor is stuck babysitting a bunch of grown men who suddenly find themselves in very muscular bodies.
6) Just Another Sunday - 279 notes - October 2023
A Chronovac story with unaware recipients and a retroactive reality shift that ripples through reality. I'm really happy with this one, though I will freely admit that I lucked out on the photos for this one.
5) An Excellent Choice - 291 notes - February 2023
My Valentine's Day story, dedicated to my boyfriend. As such, the emphasis is on a merging transformation sequence. Two men take advantage of new technology to become a new sum of themselves.
4) Group Project - 331 notes - November 2023
Another work set in the Swapper universe, where college students take advantage of body swapping technology for success or pleasure. This piece features Aiden, who has to hire a nerd to take over his body if he wants to pass his classes.
3) Cursing Fate - 337 notes - January 2023
It's an alien possession story with a dark twist. If you're going to align yourself with an extraterrestrial force, make sure you have something valuable to offer them.
2) Soul Stones: The Easy Life - 412 notes - March 2023
Alfie finds himself in the body of Jordan, one of the most popular athletes on the football team-- but he's not the one who plotted for the body swap to happen. It's one of my favorites for the year, and it's a series I could see myself returning to if the inspiration is right.
1) Rookie Mistake - 482 notes - May 2023
A novice magic user tries out an Astral Projection spell without reading all of the instructions. Things do not play out in his favor.
Special Mentions-
Travis Cordin - 382 notes - February 2023 by @mergeman
My boyfriend's Valentine's Day story that he dedicated to me. A raw and electric story about a magic user who gives the resident nerd too much magical power.
Stories I Love (Part 1) and Stories I Love (Part 2)
I was not expecting so many people to react to these lists, but these have been getting reblogged like crazy. More importantly, a lot of authors have been reaching out to show thanks and start conversations, which I appreciate even more. Like I said-- I'm not always the best at participating in the community, so I really enjoy hearing from people.
Top 5 All Time-
5) Revenge, Reversed - 517 notes - August 2020
4) Overbearing - 538 notes - May 2022
3) Finals Week - 552 notes - May 2021
2) Gym Merchandise - 610 notes - September 2022
1) Soulmate Swap - 659 notes - August 2022
It's always fascinating to see which stories get a second life through reblogs and new discoveries. Soulmate Swap is one of my heavy hitters, but both Gym Merchandise and Overbearing have gained a lot of momentum this year. Finals Week is starting to slip, though I'm still quite fond of it. I'm quite surprised to see Revenge, Reversed on this list given its age, but it's another one of my personal favorites.
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Can you rate the marauders era characters on who’s got the best bed skills
I CAN NONNIE this ask is so fun but also i'm not gonna actually rate them as in . give them scores or anything, i'm just gonna give the sort of impression they give me sex wise <333
(only doing the marauders + lily + reg + pandora bc there are too many characters and it's 1am and i'm lazy) (sooooorryyyyy) (said like shiv in s3 e2)
james: he's annoyingly good at it, just like he is at everything else. he can fuck fast and hard or slow and sweet, whatever tickles ur fancy + he always prioritises ur pleasure over his. he has great stamina which often ends with their partners overstimulated bc he can never get enough. can get vvv kinky but he likes vanilla sex from time to time. oral fixation (loves to eat pussy and he does it like a CHAMP). a crier
sirius: very good at it even tho he isn't THAT interested in sex (when he finds someone he likes tho . he's insatiable). kinky and soooo loud, is never content with just one round. loves to be controlled and bossed around but he's gonna be a brat about it regardless, just bc he enjoys pushing boundaries + testing his partner's limits
peter: mediocre but decent enough. mostly into vanilla sex, likes it sweet and intimate. gets very nervous and unsure at first but grows confident as he begins to find out what his partner likes. NEEDS cuddles afterwards and loves to be reassured while at it (this is NOT about oby peter . oby peter Fucks . and he's insanely good at it)
remus: a Wet Sock of a man even when it comes to this. whimpers and groans and gets all desperate. he usually goes for hard and fast bc . u know . his furry little problem or whatever but he tends to check up on his partner afterwards, when his mind is a bit clearer, bc he worries about going too far (idk why i said partner it's sirius it's always sirius that man is obsessed with him). gets really into it, kinda loses his mind a little, turns a lil controlling bc of it
lily: she's Good. can be a bit of a brat but if u manage to push her until she breaks she gets all desperate and needy and almost obedient. she can also be very dominant, it depends on who her partner is really, but bc of all the pressure she puts on herself she kinda enjoys letting go. knows all the techniques and tricks in the book bc she needs to be the best at everything she does but secretly likes it a lot better when it's messy and sloppy
regulus: ooooh he's a tricky one. i feel like he enjoys sex and can be a bit of a slut but he also has soooo many issues with intimacy the act tends to come with a certain bitterness. he has fun but he overthinks so much it's never a completely pleasurable experience (at least at first, he needs some level of trust u know). he's all proud and fussy and tries to play hard to get but goes all pliant and soft when he's horny enough. unable to keep quiet, will talk back but still do what u ask of him (and enjoy it). king of sucking cock
pandora: she is the Moment. no one does it like her. will ruin her partner for everyone else and she knows she fucking Knows. very dominant, and the mean kind (but makes sure about what her partner can take or can't take beforehand). she's harsh and aggressive but will always cuddle u afterwards and make sure ur feeling okay and takes care of u if ur feeling too sore. vvvvv kinky, the weird and bordering on concerning type. definitely into blood and knife play
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Opposites Attract pt2
opposites attract pt1 pt3 pt4
Hey guys sorry for taking like a long time to post the 2nd part I had lost inspiration to write and now that I have summer break I will try to write some more!!! (Judd birchxGNreader)
“Jesus I told you that was a bad idea, plus she probably would never like me, I mean I act and look like a kid that is still stuck in the emo phase they were supposed to grow out of in 7th grade, and she is like the living representation of the Teletubbies she is like the brightest person ever,” Judd said walking down the street drowning himself in the bottle of jack daniels he had since god knows when “then maybe try asking her out, I mean if you like this girl so much try asking her out and if she says yes you can shove your dick in their mouth!!!” Maury said with the biggest grin on his face “wow when I thought you were going to say the least horny thing you pull this shit” jubb chuckled then he realized he was walking to school where he knew Y/N would be because they had honor roll assembly. After 10 minutes of bumping into things from how drunk he was and almost falling he finally arrived at school and saw them outside even drunk he managed to walk towards them “Oh hey Judd” Y/N said very happy yet confused they hadn't seen him all week and now he is dunk at school out of all the places “heyyyy Y/N I wanted to ask you somethingggg i like love you like I'm in love with you and I wanted to ask you out on a date” Judd said slurring 99% of his words but Y/N still understood every word he was trying to say and even tho they liked him back they just didn't believe him I mean Judd showed up after a week of being god knows where and he shows up to say he is in “love” with them yea sure there was a reason Y/N got honor roll not just because they where intelligent academic wise they where also very good at reading other people. “Oh ok well why don't I take you home and you sober up and I will go talk to you tomorrow I will even bring you some donuts,” Y/N said grabbing Judd by the shoulder and walking him to their car “ohhhh ok yea yea yea I understand,” Judd said somehow understanding why they would say that and he knew deep down that they were not rejecting him or at least he hoped they weren't rejecting him.
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virgin s/o with baki boys???!❤️❤️💋
Oho you sick genius UwU. I'd like to preface this by saying that most of these men are virgins themselves lmao, you think any of them have time to get pussy? Lmao. Lol. So anyways, obviously NSFW.
Minors GTFO or I'm going to eat your shriveled little souls.
Baki:
Bro didn't lose his own virginity that long ago, so he's not some overly confident sex god, he still gets nervous, but that's a pretty common thing to experience with a new partner, you're both still learning about what the other likes and what they feel comfortable with, so it does take a while.
Foreplay so explosive it blows your damn mind. He's DETERMINED to make you feel good, to make sure this is something that you enjoy and that you don't end up regretting agreeing to, so he's going to pull out the stops and work real hard on getting you so horny you're dizzy.
He's slow with you. It's your first time after all, and he wants to make sure that it's special, but also comfortable. Going slow makes it easy for him to stop if you need to, be it because you need a breather or if it's because you've got one of those super fun and convenient inner leg cramps (which always happen at the best times) and just need to stop altogether.
He's attentive. Most virgins at least have played with themselves before, and so they know what they like. He's watching your face, listening to the sounds you make to figure out what it is that you like. Sometimes it's also a discovery for you too, because he'll do something and oh look, you're cumming, haha, when did that become something you liked?
He's open to trying new things to figure out what both of you like kink-wise, because he might be good in bed, but he's almost painfully vanilla, and figuring out kinks that he'd enjoy is pretty interesting to him.
Hanayama:
Vanilla. You tell him that you're a virgin and he basically just shoots you a thumbs up. You think he's ever had sex before? Maybe, he might have, there's about a 50/50 chance that you're not his first. If you are, then I hate to break it to you babes, but he's stumbling through things just as much as you are.
Honestly, he trusts you to get yourself ready. He'll show you what you've got to work with, and he'll let you get yourself ready, but don't think that he'll make you do it alone. Oh no, he'll be perfectly happy to lend you a hand (literally). He's got nice big fingers, so you can definitely work yourself up to taking him just fine with the help of his fingers. One or two is honestly more than enough to get you ready to take a normal dick, but he is *thick* so you're going to need to take about three of his and be *super* wet to take him.
He's very laid-back, you can take the reins for your first time so he knows he's not hurting you or making you uncomfortable. You want him on top of you? He'll be on top, but it's at your pace and rhythm. If you really want to make an impression, grab him by the front of his shirt and use him as you please, he doesn't care, nor does he mind.
He's attentive in a far more laid-back way than Baki, because if it's your first time he's practically relinquishing all control to you, so if you don't like something, he's not worried about it happening, because you're the one deciding what to do and who dictates the pace. Your first time with Hanayama goes at whatever speed you want, but he will encourage you to slow down a little. He won't lie, he does want to watch you using him.
He's got a vague idea of what he likes at best, if he's being entirely honest. He just goes along with a lot of stuff and sometimes he finds that maybe he's a bit more into one thing than another, so he's pretty open to trying out new kinks with you.
Chiharu:
Feral. He's feral. You're a virgin? He gets to take your virginity? He's going insane, chomping at the bit, he's rearing and ready to go you just say the word. He will do literally anything you want. Is it a kink? Maybe, possibly, perchance. Does he care enough to hide the (totally only possible) kink from you? Not really no.
Just say the word and he's on it. You want him to go down on you, fingerfuck your brains out and then make a mess out of you? He can do that, but he can also hold your hand and hold you close the entire time. He takes this very seriously. That being said, he might take a second to process if you ask him to stop because he gets so into it that his brain just lags. He will stop, he absolutely will, but it'll take him a second to process that you're talking to him.
He acts like he's starving and you're the first meal he's had in literal years. He's doing everything, humping your leg, your hand, he's practically shoving his tongue down your throat, biting your chest and your neck. He's doing all of it, and he does it because he's excited and wants you both to feel good.
Attentive but slow to actually pay attention. You want faster, he can do that, but it's going to take about two or three strokes for him to properly hear you ask him to go faster. Give him a second, he's admiring how good you feel to him. He goes at whatever pace you're wanting to go at. It's best to tell him to start slow though, because he'll forget that this is new and he might get a little rambunctious.
Oh he knows what he likes, and he's going to tell you before you even get started. You tell him you're thinking of sleeping with him and he'll buy you two some drinks, sit you down and list out all of his kinks right there on the table so you can compare notes and see what you might want to try that he likes. His likes range from tame to weird, but that's just Chiharu in general.
Katsumi:
Oh don't worry, he knows what he's doing, he'll take good care of you and make it a whole thing. You tell him that you're a virgin and thinking of having sex with him, he'll set up a nice romantic night with a relaxing bath, a movie, some quality cuddling, and then you walk into your room to find rose petals and candles around. Don't feel intimidated, it's all partially a joke because who does that lol, but he also wants you to feel special.
You dictate the pace, but he'll want to go at a decent speed. He knows that if something scares you, jumping into doing said thing usually helps, but when it's something as sensitive as sex for the first time, he's aware that that tends to make things a lot worse for everyone. He'll push you to keep going, but only if you're comfortable.
He'll want to get you to cum at least three times before you two even start getting nasty. If he can have it his way, you'll show him what you like by getting yourself off once, he'll do his best to replicate, and then it becomes a mutual thing where you both get worked up. He'll be giving you reassurance the entire time, encouraging you to just relax and show him what you like so he can make you feel good too.
Very attentive. He notices every little detail, especially in your face, but in your body language overall. He wants to pick up on all of your little queues and tendencies. For example, you might start shivering before you cum, or you scrunch up your eyebrows if he hits a good spot. He's taking note and watching you the entire time you two are getting nasty. If there's something you don't like then just tell him, he won't do it again unless you ask him to, something as simple as calling you pet names while he's in your guts, or if it's him slapping your ass while he's fucking you. He's learning as he goes with you.
He knows what he likes, but he's open to learning new things. If you've got a kink he thinks sounds interesting, he'll do his research and then he'll try it with you if that's something you want. If he's not into it, he's not into it, but still, he'd rather try it with you and have that experience.
Jack:
You tell him that you're a virgin and you want to sleep with him and I won't lie you won't see him for a few weeks. It's not because he's leaving you or anything like that, no, as a matter of fact, it's because he doesn't know what the hell he's doing. You want him?! You want him to have sex with you??? For your first time??? Why??? he just doesn't get it. He's incredibly apologetic when he does come back, it's a rare moment of complete vulnerability for him.
He's the kind to set ground rules, safe words or gestures, all of it, he's not taking any chances. That being said, wording is important, because if you tell him to stop, that's it, he's done, he won't start back up and it will take days of convincing to get him to try again, so instead of saying stop when you need a break, just tell him to give you a second and he will.
So attentive it's scary. He has a habit of watching you and your tendencies in general, he knows when you're not feeling comfortable or if you're not overly fond of something, so trying to get away with not feeling 100% on something just won't fly for him. He's going to make you feel good and safe at the same time, but he's also a nervous wreck about it.
This is a circumstance where he is entirely submissive to you. He doesn't move unless you give the okay for him to. He'll put effort in, obviously, he'll make sure that your first time is one that you won't regret, but if at all possible he's the one on the bottom for this one. He's a lot sturdier than you, and he knows that he can take a beating. Otherwise, he's the softest top you'll ever experience.
He's got a general idea of stuff that he likes, but some of his kinks he won't ever admit to. He doesn't hide them, of course, but he won't outright admit to them. He will tell you his likes and dislikes, and he fully expects you to do the same if you're aware of what you like. He doesn't just want open communication, he needs it. If you can outright tell him to keep doing something because it feels good, he will.
Kosho:
He figured, but he didn't want to assume that you were a virgin. He doesn't mind either way, to him it's just regular old sex, but maybe a bit more gentle because it's your first time. Whether or not he's bottoming or topping for you, he's going to make sure to be a little sweeter than he normally would be. Hell, by round two he's already acting how he normally would in bed.
He expects mutual work and attentiveness. He's not going to wait on you hand and foot, and he doesn't expect you to do the same to him. Simply making sure that you're both feeling good and happy with what's happening is enough for him. One of the rare few circumstances where he'll ignore his own comfort when it comes to sleep because it's nice to be held after sex.
He acknowledges and understands nerves, but if he thinks that you're not ready, then he'll stop. With Kosho, it's less you asking to stop, and him just looking down at you and saying that things are ending there for everyone's sake until things are more comfortable. If he needs to stop you two, then he'll do his best to work you up to actually having sex over the course of a few weeks or until you take matters into your own hands.
Attentive enough, and he's not going to delude himself into thinking that you're going to know everything. He knows things are going to be a bit stiff and awkward, most likely, after all, sex is a bit different from masterbating by yourself. Whatever you need to do to be comfortable is fine, be it putting on a playlist or taking a shower by yourelf.
There's a decent pace to your first time in bed with him. He'll keep things moving along, but he's not going to make out and dry hump you on the floor for like eight hours. If you're too nervous to do anything other than that, then he'll take a step back and ask if you're alright. As for kinks, he knows what he likes, but he probably won't tell you. Open to trying new things, but there are just some things that are just a hard no.
Kureha:
Torn between teasing you and being a bit cruel, but also really wants to make sure that your first time guarantees that other men won't ever be good enough for you, they won't even be able to come close to satisfying you compared to him. He's going to drive you insane because until he decides which he's going to do, you're going to be stuck with him flip-flopping between one and the other until he does make up his mind.
He's keeping a fast pace. Not so fast that you're uncomfortable, but fast enough to keep it pushing and erase most of the time you'd have to feel insecure. Obviously stop is a word he respects, but it's a slow, gradual stop so he doesn't hurt either you or himself. If you're uncomfortable or need to stop for whatever reason, he'll listen. He'll leave the room and come back a few minutes later to drag you into a nice hot bath. When you come back he's thrown new sheets and your pj's into the dryer.
Aftercare with this man after your first time is immaculate. He's getting you a nice bath, warm sheets, he's going to detangle your hair and kiss you goodnight. Really, as much as he pretends to be a bitch, he'll take good care of you after he rails your brains out.
He knows what he likes and he will be introducing you to his kinks gradually. If there's overlap, that's great! That being said, if you don't like his kinks, and he doesn't like yours, that's fine, he's not going to expect you to conform to his kinks since he likely won't conform to yours if he doesn't like them either.
Retsu:
Your first time is also his first time. It's going to be awkward and a bit intense for the both of you. Lots of feelings, lots of emotions, lots of everything. He's an old man at heart, so he wants to make you feel precious and cherished (because you are). If it winds up with him being incredibly cheesy, so be it.
He's going to go slow. Like, really slow. So slow that you're going to have to tell him to go faster more than once. He's not being malicious about it, he just doesn't know any better yet. You're both going to learn what you like eventually, but his preference for a slow and steady pace will pretty much always stick around.
He's tender. Incredibly tender actually. You want to be held and have him kiss your forehead like a lil cutie? He'll do that. If you're down for being cherished during sex then yeah, he's your man. He'll cherish you so hard that you're going to need to take A Minute to recover after. Not because your back hurts or anything, but because he showed so much love that you're going to have to take a breather to not ugly cry right after he blew your back out.
You won't even need to say the word stop bb he's paying such close attention to you that if he notices even a slight flinch that's out of place, he's stopping to ask you if you're okay or if he's hurting you.
He's so painfully vanilla that it's phyiscally owie, but he makes up for it. He's willing to go along with almost anything you might want to try with very few outright no's unless it involves actually hurting you. He can't see the appeal in it, but if you really want him to he'll at least try.
Doppo:
He knows what he's doing, don't you worry your pretty little head, he'll take good care of you. Just lay back, open your legs and let the master do his work. Attentive, he's got a grasp on all the techniques by now. He's experienced, and he'll teach you The Ways.
You're going to forget your own name by the time he's done with you. Whatever pace, position or dynamic you want, he's going to make you forget your own name and you're going to thank him for it. He's thorough, and you're not going to regret letting him take your virginity. He'd prefer to keep a decent pace, but he's not going to push you.
He wants to be sweet for your first time, but if you want him more domineering or maybe a bit more smug and teasing, he will be. He's willing to completely indulge you for your first time. Whatever fantasy you have, tell him about it, and he'll follow it to a T if he can.
Safe words, stop, he listens to all of it. He's going to make you feel safe and cherished the entire time, and you're appreciated as well. He might use all sorts of names and he might say things, but it nothing that you're not asking for.
He knows what he likes alright. Not only that, but you being a virgin and him taking your virginity is definitely a kink of his, which is a pretty nice bonus if you ask him! He's got a plan for how he's going to do it too, and he's gonna follow that if you let him. Rest assured, he's going to make you feel good.
#baki the grappler#baki son of ogre#baki dou#grappler baki#baki headcanons#baki hanma#hanayama kaoru#chiharu shiba#katsumi orochi#jack hanma#kosho shinogi#kureha shinogi#retsu kaioh#doppo orochi
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20 question for fic writers
Thanks @stereopticons and @welcometololaland for the tags, even if it is distracting me from hockey lmaooooo
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
221. No, that's not a typo.
2. What’s your total AO3 word count?
729,286! However there's a few collabs in there, per my spreadsheet where I obsessively track these things my *personal* wordcount for works on AO3 is 600,080 (so I guess I crossed 600k with this morning's kinktober! That's fun.
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Right now it's Red, White & Royal Blue. I still have my toes in Schitt's Creek, and I've written for Happiest Season and The Last of Us on AO3 as well.
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
With so much of my heart (that none is left to protest) [Red, White, & Royal Blue] - the actor AU, aka MJ Nerds Out About Shakespeare For 65,000 Words. And y'all love it, apparently 😅
We always walked a very thin line [Happiest Season] - It remains forever fascinating to me that my rage-fuelled fuck-that-ending thing I smashed out in like 3 hours after watching that film is still the most-kudosed work in the entire fandom. I guess other people shared my annoyance lol.
We were supposed to find this [Red, White, & Royal Blue] - The soulmates/solemates fic and my first fic in this fandom??? That somehow blew all my SC fics out of the water kudos-wise??? Go figure lmao.
Meet me out at the end of my rope [Schitt's Creek] - angstapalooza, my beloved.
When you care enough to send the very best [Schitt's Creek] - this being in the top five (and my second-highest SC fic) is eternally fascinating to me. A fully epistolary fic with Patrick as a greeting card writer for Hallmark?? I mean sure, it's a cute concept, but this is another one of those 'wrote it in an afternoon and y'all love it apparently' fics.
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
Absolutely! Sometimes I feel bad that my responses aren't always, like, enough. But I massively appreciate people taking the time to comment so I'm always gonna respond!
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
Probably the one that ends with MCD lmaooooo
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Most everything I write has a happy ending, but it's probably the RWRB Actor AU? Both the end of the main story and the epilogue end on massive joy
8. Do you get hate on fics?
Yeah. Particularly kink stuff (please be cool on tomorrow's y'all) but also some massively panphobic bullshit on some Schitt's Creek fics. And one or two people who have beef with me lmao. I'm liberal with my use of the 'delete comment' button haha.
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
It's been said about me that I might write a bit of smut from time to time, yes. (Though, contrary to my reputation, especially in SC, E-rated is actually only 37% of my total works.) The filthy-yet-tender kind. The let's-examine-where-kinks-come-from kind. The sex-positive kind. The let-people-be-horny-freaks kind.
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
I haven't, but I would if the right idea presented itself!
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I know of...
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Not that I know of...
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Yes! My partner in crime @ships-to-sail and I have co-written two uhhhhhh somewhat tonally different fics: The afterlife fic that was a huge treatise on grief and how the people in our lives shape us, and the one where Patrick is a snowman who comes to life complete with sparkly Twilight dildo dick. Something something range.
The Jake/Rachel series has each individual fic as a solo write, but the series is an internally consistent collaboration with @sarahlevys
And there have been a few projects where I've written a section or a chapter as part of a larger collaborative work: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5.
14. What’s your all time favorite ship?
Don't have one. I love a whole bunch for a whole bunch of different reasons.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
Technically I guess the series is a WIP, but I honestly don't know if I'll ever get to the end of the show for kink!verse. (Never say never 😭 but right now I can't see it happening.)
16. What are your writing strengths?
Fuck off stop making me be nice about myself.
Um, character voice? Both dialogue and narration. I think I'm good at getting a handle on the way characters speak and think, and when I'm on my epistolary bullshit I tend to put a lot of thought into how they text etc as well (for fandoms where we don't see that in canon haha).
Also I'm apparently really good at making readers feel their feelings. Love y'all ❤️
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
Plot lol. I've said it before and I'll say it again, there's a reason y'all keep seeing me thank @ships-to-sail for the outline on anything with any substance.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
Not opposed to it, but have a horror of google translate fail. So beyond, like, a word here or there, I wouldn't do it unless I could reach out to a fluent speaker and make sure it's right. My second language is functionally useless to me in a fandom context lol.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
HP. Fuck JKR for tainting all my memories of that time.
20. Favorite fic you’ve written?
Hey remember my answer to #1? That makes this mean.
I have a different answer every time. Been a bit dysphoric lately so today I'm gonna say it's nonbinary Alexis Rose lol.
Tried to skip people I'd seen have done it or been tagged already but was probably unsuccessful, sorry if some of y'all are feeling spammed: @affectionatelyrs @celeritas2997 @daisymae-12 @happiness-of-the-pursuit @heartitinthesilence @hgejfmw-hgejhsf @hypnostheory @inexplicablymine @myheartalivewrites @sherryvalli @smc-27 @tintagel-or-cockleshells and anyone who wants to play ❤️
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Wizard School Mysteries: Book 2 Side Characters
Ok, the supporting cast expanded a lot in this book because of the tournament arc, but let's see if I can account for them all.
Actually, shit, first I have to go with two I forgot to add to the last batch, and pretty important ones at that. Zebul Blaa, the Dökkálfar/Dark Elf extra who ends up being part of the villainous plot in the first book. Dark elves in Norse mythology were born from the maggots that ate the giant Ymir's body, so in Midgaheim they're basically fly-people. Zebul himself is still in his maggot/larval stage of his life cycle at the start of the series, but as this concept art shows, that will change. He's got more to do in the overall story yet, so keep an eye out for him.
Laurel Creusa, meanwhile, is the student whose disappearance sets James on his whole mystery solving path. I tried to set up a red herring with her as well - James drops the word "tower" is his one conversation with her, which, given how the arcana are revealed in book 1, could have been taken as a hint that she was the final ally James needed to make in that book. But, alas, twas not to be - and I'm not sure if anyone fell for my ruse to this day.
Ok, back to book 2 proper. Professor Prospera Bubos and Professor Heka Tlancheb are the two teachers who are most responsible for the tournament at the center of the conflict in Tournament of Death, and it's fun because they're kind of polar opposites from the magic end of things - a professor of healing magic vs. a professor of combat magic - yet they both ultimately prove to be reasonable authority figures who protest the school turning an blind eye to how the students get hurt. Professor Bubos is loosely based on an alchemist character I drew ages back - mainly the big, pointy shoulders with prominent stitches. Meanwile Heka is just me being horny on main making fun of my own fondness for terrifying witch women.
We also get to see Professor Kobut Nyftek, who I think was mentioned in book 1 but not actually seen. They're one of the nicer teachers in the school, and costume-wise I took a lot of inspiration from Dr. Maruki's supervillain get up in Persona 5 Royal. There is... so much Persona in Wizard School Mysteries's DNA, way more than there is Harry Potter, and yet I know Harry Potter is the only thing it'll ever be compared to. A tragedy.
Simeon Helmschmied isn't a terribly complicated teacher concept - I just wanted to make him look like a badass, grizzled wizard blacksmith. D&D really popularized the idea of wizards not being armored and, like, I get it for mechanical reasons, but also I think some wizards deserve to also be heavily armored tanks.
Lacey Spidergrin is part of my ongoing attempt to sexualize Slenderman, and I think it's working gang.
As I said in the last post, before I enacted the grand plan to create a vast reserve of Spare Wizard Students, I plotted out a few supporting cast students based on alternate names for the Major Tarot Arcana. Godfrey Lionhardt and Columbina Paggliacci are based on alt names for The Magician - the Magus and the Juggler respectively - and loosely embody the traits of that card in turn, with flavorings based on the alt names they're given. A Magus is a more respected, princely equivalent of a magician - "Gift of the Magi" and all that - so Godfrey has a princely look about him. His last name, Lionhardt, marks him as being part of one of the noble houses in his home country of Bretonce, so he may well actually be a prince for all you know. Meanwhile, Columbina obviously takes the clown associations with "The Juggler" and plays them up to the hilt - which also allowed me to emphasize the fact that clowns are a monster species in my setting rather than just a job strange weirdos take.
I've mentioned how Joan Tatou is basically a collection of traits that Margot and Gretchen lost in the prewriting stages of the series, so I won't go heavily into that here. She's the Papesse, i.e. the High Priestess if she was more imperious and French. Wiglaf and Wagner, meanwhile, represent The Road and The Victory, which are alternate names for the Chariot - and also words that are used in a lot of descriptions of the Chariot, which makes them both feel like incomplete versions of it. That is to say, if you substitute The Road or The Victory for The Chariot in your Tarot deck, you're kind of specifically simplifying the meaning of the card. Which is why Wiglaf and Wagner are, like, just Margot's soccer hooligan fans - an extension of the Chariot, if you will.
Tinnea Lunae's prompt was "vampire who's primary animal form is a moth instead of a bat." She's trans, too, even if it hasn't come up yet. She, Titania, Sadie, and (eventually) Zebul work on the school's Newsparchment, What's the Buzz?
Grammy Crumblebuttons played a valuable role as a red herring in book 2, but her part in the narrative isn't over yet. Demented old women are too fun to write.
The Great Nyaa and Ursula Cobb are both animal-themed gag characters, but I like to think they're pretty distinct outside of that. Not that we'll know very much about the Great Nyaa given, you know, what happens in book 2.
Ok I think we can actually get to the contestants in the tournament now. Aldonza Dulcinea's outfit is specifically based on the movie outfits for Professor Umbridge. Her earlier designs were less good more generic wizard outfits, but by this point the "Let's spite the Terf Queen" streak in me was strong, and I thought it'd be fun to have a plus size character who's into pink and "girly" stuff not only be a hero, but an explicitly kind and beloved one.
I think my original concept for Breowyn was "what if a studio head forced me to tone down Margot's character concept to be more easily marketable." She's a warrior girl but, like, in the "kind of a tomboy" way that's socially acceptable instead of being a giant with a fucked up arm who looms over everybody. Ironically, I ended up really liking her design - I guess even a watered down Margot is still a fun character for me to work with.
Waldorf Brimli is, like, a wizard in the vein of the evil cult leaders in H.P. Lovecraft's stuff, and a student in the vein of those specific kind of nerds/geeks who are deeply misanthropic and antisocial under the excuse that they assume everyone hates them so they might as well hate everyone back. So, like, the kind of person who'd update the Chris Chan wiki, basically.
Gyrion Clodson is part of the "LOTR Gang," a subgroup of the Spare Wizard Students comprised entirely of Midgaheim versions of various sapient races from LOTR. Gyrion is our dwarf, though in Midgaheim dwarves are synonymized with gnomes.
My goal with Serena, beyond simply homaging magical girl tropes, was to have her be a "badass" character who's explicitly feminine - all her kickass offensive spells use pretty shiny crystals, she loves pink so much that her hair turned that color, she's very much a girly girl. So when I picked her opponents in the tournament, I wanted them to be various shades of masculine to contrast her, with three of them specifically underestimating her because of her feminine traits.
Margot's opponents (Shere Statchell included but not pictured here since she's in the previous post) are meant to play on different traits she has - Shere is has a physical disability (even worse than Margot's, since she fully lost her arm), Chungo and Eruz are both inhumanly large and somewhat ostracized for the danger people fear they present, and Sarkani is a wizard whose powers are distinctly ominous, even if she revels in that rather than trying to hide and restraint it like Margot. Sarkani also has an explicit dragon motif to go with Margot's more subtle one.
Next: alternate outfits!
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Alright, giving you Ordomaze with 💙
Because I think having them tipsy would be funny? I can't imagine drunken Ordo lmao
Hey @hexerein, thank you so much for the request! ♡ (￣З￣)
YES, drunk Ordo is really something challenging, but also I'm obsessed with the thought that Ordo is also a menace in his own way. I usually depict him as someone who never goes overboard with drinking since he likes to be in control, or doesn't drink at all when he doesn't want to - he is pretty much immune to social pressure coming from larger groups. Now I did a little exception for the sake of the scene, but I think competitive-drinking is something he won't say no to either way. Especially against an alpha or his own brothers.
As for the fic, I have to admit... I overdid a little. xD Wordcount-wise, I only wanted to do a little snippet and ended up having 1600 word long shenanigan with these dorks.
Are they drunk? Pretty much. Are they kissing? Oh yes. Funny? You decide :) I hope you like it!
Every mispelled word in the dialogues are deliberate. Outside of it, sorry for that.
After so many hungover survived together, Ordo and Maze always reached to that conclusion that the real winners of the drinking contests are the bar owners themselves. But they would never learn. Ordo may appeared a sore loser tonight, but his premature retreat from the challenge’s end before both of them end up throwing up in one of the alleys of Coruscant was deliberate and very much calculated - on one hand, HE didn’t want to throw up in one of the alleys of Coruscant. Second, he didn’t want Maze throw up in one of the alleys of Coruscant either. Also, drinking eventually led to horniness which overrode every instinct of competitiveness in him and fucking Maze in the middle of the bar suddenly looked a tempting idea, but Ordo also remembered that indulging in a fantasy of fucking someone on the barcounter while everyone else’s watching might be a good way to show that the alpha’s ass belonged to him, but overall, it was not socially acceptable to do it in the CSF officer’s club. Neither was throwing up in one of the alleys of Coruscant.
The null and the alpha captain were a stumbling mess of a pair, clinging to each other’s necks, trying to navigate their way in the Arca-barracks. Their usual banter lead to the same disaster if less rage-filled carnage this time.
“M’room” grumbled Ordo.
“Mroom” meowed back Maze, because was sure that’s how you maintain a conversation in tooka, and was certain Ordo tried to imitate one.
“No, mine!”
“’kay” Maze flashed a broad smile as he leaned in to bore his head into Ordo’s, only he didn’t exactly assess well the intensity of his display of affection and bumped their skulls so hard, they both saw stars for a minute.
“Oww! The kriff??? Whazzatfor?” Ordo bent his elbow around Maze’s neck to get into a chokehold.
“I ssssaid ‘I love you’ in tooka!”
“Ah… okay. That’s fine” Ordo was pleased with the answer, so didn’t actually choke his boyfriend. He released him to cling onto his arm more instead. That limb belonged to the null now. “’Love you too.”
“You are so sweet right now, my love” cooed Maze back. “Sweet, sweet kitten.”
Ordo blushed as he felt a pleasant heat going into his cheeks. He pretty much wanted to be Maze’s kitten right now. The only and favorite. But also he was sure his words didn’t reach the drunk Alpha’s brain.
“But my room. My room. We go there. Take me tom’room.”
“Ayy-aye, whersyouroom again?”
“I don’t care, don’t - Just… just… take me there.”
“My room then.”
“Noooo!” whined Ordo in protesting and bumped into Maze, “your blanket smells like you fa-woaahhh!!!” he couldn’t elaborate on how exactly Maze’s blanket smelled like, because the alpha lost his balance and both started to lean in one direction like an over-packed sack of potatoes.
Maze had to grab the nearest fire extinguisher on the wall to keep themselves on foot - and he tore it down. They both look at it with child-like astonishment before started laugh uncontrollably but this time they had the wall to hold onto. Maze wanted to put it back to its place but his hands trembled from the tremors of shared laugh, it kept falling down, making loud clashing noises, probably waking up the whole barrack by now.
Several doors suddenly whooshed open, an adrenaline-heated sergeant dashed out, about to yell who’s causing this ruckus and tell them to keep it down, only to be stopped by the sight of Ordo hunching forward, shaking with inaudible laughter as Maze tried to give his sincere ‘appolojeews’ to the fire extinguisher, now war-weary and bent, lying on the floor.
The sergeant considered his options in this situation. If he wanted to make a smart comment about the very fact that Captain Ordo had been so wasted like it was obligatory, he quickly reminded himself that the null captain not just outranked him but was completely able to maim him to death with his bear hands even in this drunk state. Now while Captain Maze also outranked him, wouldn’t maim him to death with his bear hands (he could), but given that the alphas were all prideful and self-conscious bastards, Maze would find a way to make the sergeant’s rather short life miserable, worse than death, given they shared space under the same roof. The sergeant silently retreated back to his room without saying a word.
The pair eventually reached Maze’s room. One last opponent to be defeated: a door with access code needed to open. They stood before that door and Ordo took his time to enjoy this moment of peaceful silence. It was cozy, they were alone in the half-lit empty corridor of the alpha-wing, and it made Ordo snuggle closer to Maze. Their armors collided with small clank, but Maze’s skin peeping out of his blacks was to his liking and gently started nosing the carotid. He liked the feeling of the pumping blood pulsing through his lover’s vein. Almost could hear his heartbeat. He counted them for at least two minutes, when Ordo realized that Maze didn’t just not reciprocated the small gesture of affection to his dismay, but nothing was happened at all.
“What ar’you waitin’ for” He looked at Maze in confusion and nodded to terminal.
“Uhhh…” Maze scratched his head. “I forgot.”
“What.”
“The code. Forgot my code.”
“Sevn-sevn-three-six-nain-sevn-five-eigth-ate…” mumbled Ordo as gently started to sucking on his skin, leaving a lovemark.
“Wha-wha-wai-wai-wai-wai-waitholdon, you’re notartikyulting! Not that - Ordo.”
“Honey-sweet” Ordo now whispered in his ears, teeth gently nibbling on it.
Maze shuddered, hearing the petname Ordo gave him long time ago. He was sure about he messed up the numbers along the way because the terminal blared “access denied” into his face.
“I have to consentrait, you know” his voice started to rasp and tried to tap the numbers again into the screen with much more urgency.
“Multitask then.”
Ordo reached his lover’s mouth, sucking on his lower-lip like his life depended on it. Maze huffed into the kiss with amusement. He messed up the numbers again. Access denied.
“What the…”
“Stupid alpha, you can’t even do this right…” Ordo growled, became irritated how his alpha boyfriend couldn’t even get into his room without his help. But that meant he could take the opportunity to shine. He turned Maze around and pushed him to the wall, pressing his lips to Maze’s, one hand keeping him in place, while he tapped the screen without even looking. He didn’t need to look, only needed to stare into those brown eyes, slowly filled with the lust for him.
“Howdoye- how do…” Maze tried to form his question which bugged his last remaining intelligent part of his brain, but Ordo sent that solitary braincell completely AWOL too.
“I would be an osik’la boyfriend if I didn’t know all your codes to reach you.”
“Fuckin' creep” Maze grinned into his lips. Ordo took the initiative to push his tongue inside Maze’s mouth, exchanging a wet, sloppy kiss, loud with Maze’s moans. The alpha embraced him with his arms, combing through his hair with his fingers.
Access denied.
Now Ordo furrowed his forehead in dissatisfaction, but also, unbelieving. Unless Maze changed the code, no way his memory failed him now. He broke the kiss to lick that sweet spot under Maze’s jaw with an ulterior motive to make the alpha a mewling, needy mess, but also to have half an eye on the screen. He tried to tap the numbers again.
He couldn’t finish. The door swooshed open, revealing a very annoyed alpha glaring at the smooching couple with such intensity, they started to believe the jaig eyes on his forehead only served the sole purpose to lend him another pair of eyes to judge them.
Ordo broke the kiss and sneered back malevolently while maintaining eye-contact with Fordo’s real eyes - in the wildlife another set of eyes were meant for the predators to distract and scaring off bigger adversaries than themselves and Ordo wasn’t stupid. Just drunk. And jealous. Why was Alpha-77 in his boyfriend’s room and why was another naked ass mooning him from Maze’s bed?!
Maze didn’t exactly connect the dots just yet but he already felt Ordo tensing up in his embrace. He instinctively held him tighter to comfort him, the null would usually rather die than suffer from shame. Now the thing is, Ordo rarely felt shame unless it got him into trouble and Maze knew that very well so there was a slight chance that his boyfriend plotted a homicide instead. Double, if he was fortunate enough. Unlike Ordo, he felt ashamed in front of his alpha brother right now.
Good thing, Fordo never wasted words to tell off his younger brothers. Just kept on glaring, with his hand signed to direction of room next to them.
Maze followed the gesture. “Oh” he said, staring into the air as light understanding suddenly shined through the haze of inebriation. “Right. Thanks” waved a little goodbye with a sheepish smile.
Fordo flipped him off and returned to his room, shutting them out, hopefully once and for all.
Ordo teared himself away from Maze to run at the next door, his boots screeched at the floor as he stopped and excitedly started to type the code into the door terminal. Maze could only blink and Ordo was already in his room.
Maze was about to drown in self-pity, left alone in the corridor, still leaning against the wall when Ordo sticked his head out, searching for him and yelled.
“ALPHA, I DESIRE AFFECTION!” And disappeared again.
Maze almost burst out in a loud laugh, Ordo’s unique approach of seduction caught him off guard and made the unfortunate encounter with one of his brothers a minor inconvenience. He followed after his lover, giggling under his nose, and closed the door behind them.
Tags for those who asked: @ithillia, @insertmeaningfulusername
#ordomaze#clonecest#cloneship#cloneshipping#ordo skirata#alpha-26 maze#republic commando#repcomm#star wars#mamuzzy writes stuff
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