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spencerscoven · 3 years

Text

— sad girl

about ; Spencer wants you more than anything, but he already has someone waiting at home for him.

gif by saramichellesgellar

CONTENT WARNING: smut, oral sex (fem receiving), slight choking, fingering, semi public intercourse, unprotected sex, cheating, brief mentions of violence, slight angst

a/n : came out of the fic closet for this <3 any request, concepts, or if you would like to be in a tag list, send your request to my inbox !! and enjoy

Being a mistress on the side, it might not appeal to fools like you...

What you could never tell a soul was that it started months before, weeks before he had ever first officially laid his hands on you. The lingering eyes, antsy hands, the words that had meant something else that went unsaid. They had implied the words that Spencer would never say out loud, in fear of the guilt that lined his stomach: I want you. But I have her.

Creeping around on the side, would not be something you would do...

JJ kissed him on the cheek, hands softly massaging the knots of his shoulders while she whispered the words that announced, "something came up..." and with that, she left Spencer with the taste of desire on his lips as his eyes gaped towards your direction. He watched you like he always did when he got a chance, seeing how the tips of your fingers ran across the edge of your cubical, your legs cross and eyebrows furrowed in thought. He knew what you were reading— only because his eyes glazed over the same file. The unsub was a 43 year old man with the signature of engraving x's into his victim's chests. And he wondered, thought hard, if you could focus on the case while you wore a skirt that tight.

"JJ's gone? Hotch just left, looks like it's just you and me. Now, what do you think of this?"

You inquired, shocking Spencer into looking up to see you standing beside him, the steps you took to get there unknown to him at the time they had happened. He pinched his thigh through his slacks. Get a grip.

You slid into his cubical next to him, stacking "The Narrative Of John Smith" in the next corner, along with his other books that were too advanced for you to even begin to understand, so you could sit your hips on his desk and place the annotated file next to him.

"So, I've found that Avery Pincher was abandoned by his mother at eight. She found another life elsewhere, and he didn't fit into the picture... you get the gist of it all," You looked up and smiled sheepishly, flattening out the top of your skirt which allowed Spencer's eyes to heed recognition of the smooth goosebumps laid on your thighs. He wanted skin to skin, mouth to mouth.

But you haven't seen my man... you haven't seen my man.

"Cold?" He questioned, sight trailing up your torso, only to see that your eyes already met his.

He could keep this up like he had for months, he could act like he couldn't cut though the tension between them. He could imagine that Morgan didn't squint his eyes at him every time he said your name in the conference room. He could set his hopes on thinking he had enough strength to go home and meet JJ, make love to her instead of fantasizing about fucking you. It was part of his job, bending people to his decree and staying in control. But he just didn't have the will when it came to you.

"Cold? No Reid— So I studied the letters his mother sent him after she left, all of them signed with an X, for kisses, as she signed them off. She thought it was endearing, he didn't seem to like it... hence his signature and the victims looking like her—"

"Then why do you have goosebumps?" He announced, rather than asked, as his long fingers wrapped around the top of your knee. He felt you take in a sharp breath before he heard it.

He's got the fire, and he walks with flames...

"Think about what you're doing, Reid. You think I haven’t caught onto these little things? Because I have,” Your words were spoken with quiet vexation even though you leaned towards his chest, but most importantly they told him that you knew. Your eyes were criminal, finally revealing your awareness of the depraved cat and mouse game that kept up between the two of you.

You'd seen the way he watched you. You'd felt his eyes down your blouse, his fingers that ghosted too long on your waist as he opened the door for you in the mornings. You’d spent nights thinking, rationalizing that Spencer was brilliant, and surely knew what was good for himself. You fought so hard, only to land on the realization he was just a man. A man with an insufferable craving in the pit of his stomache.

"I can feel your pulse. I have thought about this. Day in, day out. You don't think I've seen you looking too?" He stood, hands dragging further up your legs, to your waist, under your skirt, your hipbone, the insides of your thighs to feel your heat. He couldn't stop the soft smile forming on his lips when you sighed.

"Here you are, ass on my desk, pussy right in front of me, and you're telling me you didn't know this was bound to happen?”

His Bonnie on the side, his Bonnie on the side...

His lips mashed into yours, wasting no time, both your breaths hitching as teeth clashed and he fought to destroy you, to drown you in dizziness and lust. Finally, finally, finally, skin to skin, mouth to mouth. With his hands wrapped around your neck, nails digging in and stifling the moans threatening to uprise in your throat as he held you back from his lips, allowing you to gaze up drunkenly as your head lulled back and forth.

"I've barely touched you." You could hear the smirk in his voice, sticking your tongue out as he slowly pulled at your wet panties, your black skirt already bunched up your waist.

"This is what you want?" He mockingly laughed, gathering his saliva and spitting upon your tongue, serving his passion with hostility.

Obediently, you swallowed, thrusting your lower half into his own abdomen before your lips connected again, good sense and respect thrown out the window as you two forgot completely about the world outside, allowing each other to envelop each whole.

"You've been waiting to do this forever, I can taste it on my lips... so go ahead and ruin me." You murmured softly, as if the building was full and it was only meant for him to hear, but roughy in nature, your hands reaching for his cock that was already hard and showcasing a tent in his pants. Spencer slapped them away, placing your hands back on the edge of the desk as he situated himself in the leather chair of his office, pulling your pussy closer to his face.

"Spencer—"

"I think about you a little more than I should. I think about this," He hungrily ran his middle finger down your vagina, spreading your wetness from your hole to your clit, basking in the way it glimmered off the insides of your thighs before placing the tip of his finger between his lips, a selfish act. "well, I think about this a lot."

You reach your hands down to cup his cheeks in silent approval, his pupils dilated while he begins to pump just his middle finger in and out at a steady pace, your hips thrusting up to meet his just seconds before his tongue pounces. At first he doesn't hear your noises— too focused on your taste and allure as he takes your clit into his mouth and sucks, adding another finger. Above him, you grasp the short cubical wall, holding on as if you'd fall into endless abyss without it, making animalistic noises that make Spencer think he could die right there and here, his face and fingers buried in your cunt. He's a man of science, yet he thinks he's seen God.

He witnesses you grab his head of hair, pushing him up against you and grinding up and down as if you couldn't get enough, shouting his name, and spouting your release on his lips. You twitch, riding out your high with his face planted between your legs and your soul located on another planet.

You look down to witness Spencer cleaning you off with his tongue, his mouth swallowing your wetness that had spread to your thighs, his hips under a spell, causing them to thrust into the empty space, allowing you to realize in that moment that he hadn't even noticed he was doing it, either. You grab him by the top of his sweater bringing his face to your level with a simple request,

"Fuck me, Spencer?"

He smiles gleefully, reaching down to unbuckle his trousers that already spotted precum on the front of them, a moan rising lowly in his throat.

"I need to get this dick inside of you before I cum." He pumps himself a few times, before pushing into your cunt, hand rising to hold your legs back, unable to keep the strident moan from coming out of his throat, your fingernails drilling into his hips, waist, mouth, neck, anything you could grasp.

He's got the fire and he walks with flames...

One after the other, his hips snap to yours quickly, meeting in a smack as his thumb connects between the both of you in circles to rub, coaxing your second orgasm out.

He's got the fire and he talks with flames...

You both moan out, cumming over one another, producing what Spencer would call "the perfect melody", if there had ever been one.

He kisses you one last time, and this time's different. It feels like longing, and you can't be too sure as you draw back to look at him and he stares blankly across the room, breath heavy. You watch as he bends to look through his desk, pulling out a tissue and wiping his cum from your core softly, eyes focused on anything but your face before he's shoving it into his pocket to dispose of outside the office.

What shocks you most is when he takes your peach panties that were once discarded on the floor and tucks them into his desk, under files, for safe keeping. But Spencer still won't meet your eyes.

You hoist your hips up, sliding off the surface of the wooden desk to spread out your skirt, now wrinkled, and to sweep your hair out of your face, that to your surprise, he does himself to catch your attention.

"Look, I just..." He begins, and you bite your lip, the realization of what you've done setting in.

In the back of your mind, you know what makes you actually feel bad. It’s the fact that you don't feel much remorse, if at all, and it causes the high tides of your mind to drown, shame swallowing you from the inside out. The lingering touches, the stares— the everything, they happened before Spencer and JJ. You reminisce, afraid to blink, scared that you’d see the memories of Spencer telling you about her would come flashing behind your eyelids, replaying like they always did at night.

Before he was JJ's, he was yours. Part of you begged to say he still was, even though you watched who he walked into the office with each day when they exited the same car, hand in hand. You tilted your head, as if to encourage him to go on, to finish telling you he regretted it, even if his eyes showed the opposite. There was not a single chance in the world that he could utter what he really wanted to, not after he had been pining after her for years. Not one of you were stupid enough to do that and you knew it.

His Bonnie on the side, his Bonnie on the side, makes me a sad, sad girl...

"I just wanted to tell you that I know we shouldn't have done this but—"

He glances down as the phone in his left pocket begins to ring, and before he even pulls it out, both of you are eerily aware of exactly who it is, the ironical energy of it all lingers in the air as Spencer gives you a sad look, picking up the phone.

"Hello? Oh— no. I was just getting ready to leave. Just finishing up the night." He looks right at you, contemplating, before cleaning off the rest of your wetness on his chin with the sleeve of his jumper. He’s just fucked you silly, only to go home to her.

You find yourself shoving your heels on and collecting your things off your desk across the room, his eyes following you and doing the same.

I'm a sad girl, I'm a sad girl, I'm a sad girl...

Spencer walks beside you to the doors of the BAU, knowing that hours from now, in the morning, you’d both come to work. You'd act like it never happened, avoid and ignore each other, until wondering hands wondered again. Until then, Spencer would deny himself of the woman he spent his time thinking about. He’d act as if he didn't need you.

He placed his hand on your lower back as he opened the doors ahead of you, slinging his messenger bag strap higher up his shoulders, and let his fingers dawdle there for just a second more than needed, the signal not unbeknownst to you. With just the two of you here, he loiters on the idea that that cannot ever be, you and him. And on his lips he tastes spite, mixed with wishful thinking.

I'm a sad girl, I'm a sad girl, I'm a mad girl.

part 2

masterlist

#spencerscoven #spencer reid #criminal minds fic #spencer reid angst #spencer reid smut #mgg #matthew gray gubler #spencer reid x reader #angst #bau #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid fan fiction #spencer reid fanfic #requests #bau fanfic

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entishramblings · 3 years

Text

The Color of Periwinkle [Legolas X Aragorn]

A.N: the first part of this fic is 100% completely utterly platonic (no matter what)....the rest of it, however, you may decide for yourself

Request: anon — May I request a one-shot where Legolas is sleeping (recovering from an injury and is in Imladris) and Aragorn is sitting next to him, watching over him and like braiding a strand of his hair??? tooth rotting fluff please!!! Thank you xoxo

and

anon — Aloha! can i request a legolas x argorn oneshot where Aragorn is braiding flowers into legolas's hair? FLuff please!!! Love your previous works! keep it up<3

Pairing: Legolas X Aragorn

Summary: The three times Aragorn braids Legolas’s hair

Word Count: 2,075

Warnings: angst, fluff, cuteness, some wounds/injury

(gif not mine)

MASTERLIST | AO3

The Woodland Prince had come to Rivendell to deliver a message from his father and opted to stay for a couple days. Hence, the elf currently stood upon a long winding balcony letting his gaze linger amongst the breeze of Imaldris, for it had been long since he last visited.

It was quite pleasant; he never got much time to observe the beauty of nature when he was at Mirkwood. Therefore, Legolas let his senses become captivated by his surroundings. His vision was ensnared with the purple, red, and orange leaves that were just beginning to fall from the swaying trees. His nose was engrossed in the fresh air that had started to cool as the colors of the sun begun to fade. And his ears were preoccupied by the hushed breaths and faint giggles of a child.

A soft smirk tugged at Legolas’s lips for the child was indeed not aware that Legolas knew of his presence. But, how could the Mirkwood Prince not be conscious of the little spying creature? After all, elves had quite incredible abilities.

Once the the next muffled laugh sounded, Legolas finally turned his head to look; and it was then when he caught the gaze of the curious eyes observing him from behind the corner of a wall.

The elf couldn’t withhold the urge to play with the little one, for it was quite obvious that is what the child wanted and, quite frankly, it was adorable. Besides, it had been some time since there were children running around the Woodland Realm.

Legolas moved from his spot and poked his head around the side of the stone—only to startle the human.

Human?

Quite strange.

The soft smile and gentle gaze of the Mirkwood Prince seemed to assure the child that he was in no danger for he did not back away.

“What is your name, little one?”

Inquiring eyes they were, pooled with the silver of shining metal and periwinkle buds, as they gazed upon the blonde Prince. Yet the child did not speak so Legolas opted to do so.

“I am Legolas. I come from the Woodlands to visit with Elrond.”

The dark haired boy’s expression changed at the mention of Elrond, clearly recognizing the person they spoke of. This common figure among them seemed to initiate trust within him for he spoke, all worries left behind. “Estel is what they call me.”

Legolas smiled in response before speaking, “Won’t you walk with me, Estel? Perhaps we might come across Elrond; he is quite fun to play pranks upon.”

Estel grinned at his sentence. “How would you know he is fun to trick?”

The Mirkwood Prince glanced down at the boy with a raised brow and spoke with a teasing tone. “Because I was the one who used to do it!”

Surprising the elf so, Estel reached up and took his hand. The two began to stroll around the paths of Imaldris, talking of the various escapades and antics that they had let loose upon the Lord of Rivendell.

By the time the pair of pranksters had made it inside, the clouds in the sky had been replaced with twinkling stars.

Legolas chose to sit on the floor by the fire in the library, for he supposed the little human might be cold. And indeed Estel joined him.

The intrusive little hands of the boy reached for Legolas’s hair.

“May I braid it?” He asked. “Arwen has been teaching me!”

A light chuckled left the Mirkwood Prince’s lips for he could not hold it back. “I suppose you may, but do not tangle it for I cannot face Elrond with a bird’s nest of hair....again.”

Estel released a bright laugh at the elf’s words and begun to weave the golden strands together.

It was after a long plait was completed, resembling that of a fish’s tail, that Lord Elrond stumbled upon the pair. Yet, he could not bring himself to force the boy to go to sleep for the scene before him was just too pure.

......

Over the years, Legolas had visited Rivendell often—often for an elf that is. Sometimes Estel was there and other times he was not. However, the child had grown up of sorts. Now, a man with stubble and a ranger with blade he had become. Strong and lean—built with muscles and hours of training.

Estel had still remained close with Legolas. The elf was one of the first ones he told of his true heritage and they spent much time together. The Mirkwood Prince would come with him on various scouting missions and even taught him how to use a bow. However, it was not always as easy. It was clear to the elf that Estel finding out his true heritage and what happen to his kin took a toll. He became quite reckless. He would dive into fight after fight, abandoning logic and discipline. But Legolas would keep a careful eye on him; yet his gaze could not always be spared from his royal duties. It was one of these times that the young dunedain was too rash.

Legolas had been making his way to Rivendell and, quite frankly, it was only luck that he stumbled across the bloodied plane when he did. A scouting trip appeared to have gone terribly wrong. Bodies of orcs and rangers alike littered the grass—staining the forest floor with death. Among all of the carnage, stood one man with a sword of red.

“Aragorn?” Legolas called out in worry as he dismounted his horse.

The man’s head snapped in the direction of the voice. “Legolas?” He called out in surprise.

The elf, quick on his feet, made his way to the center. “What happened?”

Aragorn shook his head in response.

Legolas clenched his jaw, “Did you move in too quickly? Did you scout ahead in advance? Did you—“

The man cut him off with a sharp irritated tone, “Enough! Do not chastise me.”

The elf breathed hot air from his nose, “Aragorn, men have died.”

“You think I do not know that?!” His rough voice grated out.

Legolas sighed, “I am just—“

The elf stopped speaking and whipped his head around as his elvish ears picked up the sound of a plucking bow. The following whistling of an arrow did not escape his attention either. Instead, it showed him the target.

Estel.

Legolas jumped forward just as the sharpened weapon was to thud into Aragorn’s chest. Rather than finding a home in the ranger’s heart, it buried itself into the elf’s shoulder.

“Legolas!” Aragorn hollered.

But it was too late.

The elf cried out as pain ruptured through his arm.

Another arrow came whizzing at the two, yet it just missed them.

“We must go!” Aragorn yelled as he pulled Legolas back to his horse.

As the elf struggled to climb upon the steed, Aragorn grasped his friend’s bow and let loose a couple arrows in the direction from which they came.

Curse words tumbled from his lips as it seemed he had not met his mark for more came back to him.

Hopping up behind the elf, he urged the horse to make hast.

They were quick to escape immediate death but that was not a solution, for as they went Legolas’s breath was labored and he seemed the slump against the man behind him.

As concern pooled in his mind, Estel spoke. “What is wrong, Legolas?”

The elf shook his head and hissed out one word, “Poison.”

By the time they thundered into Rivendell, Legolas was unconscious. Healers rushed to them instantly and pulled the elf away from the sorrow-ridden Ranger.

Time slowed for Estel as worry edged its way into his heart. There was no doubt in his mind that this was his fault for Legolas was right. He had been too reckless—too rash—and the elf had paid for it.

When dusk settled into the sky, Lord Elrond finally came for the pacing man.

The dark haired elf placed a hand upon Aragorn’s shoulder as he spoke. “He will be all right, Estel. I was able to pull the poison from his blood. He just needs rest.”

Relief washed over the ranger as the words registered in his mind, for if anything had happened to his dear friend he would surely be lost to grief.

“May—may I see him?” Aragorn uttered quietly.

Elrond nodded and guided the man to the room where Legolas’s unconscious form laid.

The elf was still, frozen like the icy lakes of winter. His porcelain face was pale as clammy sweat sleeked his brow—giving his skin a periwinkle tint. His lips were parted and eyelids closed. If it was not for his bare chest rising and falling gently, Aragorn would have thought him dead.

The Ranger slowly shuffled forward until he was at the side of the bed. The white dressing upon Legolas’s shoulder was wrapped firmly around the wound with only slight red seeping through. It did not look bad, but Aragorn knew that the wound itself hadn’t been fatal—it was the poison.

He sat upon the mattress as Elrond left him alone with his thoughts.

It was then when Aragorn could not help himself, for his shaking hand reached towards the blonde locks that sprayed out amongst the sheets. Slowly, he took a small section and began to plait it together. The repetitive notion seemed to calm his anxieties so he continued until the golden locks were filled with a bunch of tiny braids. They were a bit out of place, but Aragorn was no expert. He only knew he felt better when his hands were busy and upon the elf.

......

Nowadays, Aragorn was the chieftain of the dunedain. He had grown up much, one would say. No longer was he hotheaded and rash; instead, his recklessness was replaced with caution and deliberately contemplated decisions. A good change indeed. Yet with his responsibilities and Legolas’s princely duties, it was not likely for the two to be in the same place at the same time. So, it was merely by chance that they were both visiting Rivendell during the same season.

Many elves were wandering the Rivendell meadows and gardens for the spring’s breeze was gentle and freeing. Legolas, who spent his days in darkened corridors and the dreadful shadows of Mirkwood’s sickness, was certainly one of these elves.

The blonde prince rested on his back with the green grass and vibrant flowers whispering upon his skin. He let his eyelids flutter closed as the warmth of the sun spread within his chest and the scent of honey and jasmine filled his nostrils. His heart felt at peace.

“You’re father would not approve of wasting time like this,” A voice stated smugly from above.

Legolas cracked a smile for he recognized the tone immediately. “What he doesn’t know, won’t hurt him.”

The Ranger sat down next to the elf and let his forearms rest upon his knees. Aragorn seemed to also let the serenity of nature settle over him as he plucked at the various colored buds sprouting below him.

“So strange that such a small thing could be so beautiful and intricate,” He murmured under his breath as he examined the vein-like shapes within the petals.

Legolas sat up and carefully removed the flower from his friend’s grasp. “You are quite correct.” He paused for a moment as he examined the light periwinkle floral leaf, “You know, this color reminds me of your eyes.”

Aragorn let out a deep chuckle as he took the flower back from the elf.

A long moment passed as the two enjoyed the gentle lull of nature.

Surprising the Mirkwood Prince, Estel reached forward and let his fingers slip through one of Legolas’s blonde locks. The elf sent him a side glance of slight confusion but did not stop the man. The Ranger scooted behind his friend and began to plait his hair once again, weaving the small flowers into it as he went.

Aragorn spoke softly, “You know, this color goes well with your hair.”

Legolas smirked, “Is that your way of saying that my hair goes with your eyes?”

The Ranger rolled his grey orbs and tugged slightly on the elf’s blonde locks, “Is that your way of saying so?”

The elf shrugged as he tried to hide his grin.

The two sat there, in the meadows of Imaldris, for they both felt at peace wrapped in the color of periwinkle.

.....

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knightofameris · 4 years

Text

period pains pt. 2

a/n: I HAD TO SPLIT IT UP BECAUSE I REALIZED THE TAGS GOT MESSSYYYYYY SO LOL

also just like i mentioned in pt 1, i’m still getting used to writing for haikyuu boys but i think i have an okay grasp at them,,, bokuto is the one i’m least confident on

haikyuu boys taking care of their s/o who’s on their period ;-;

the boys in question: Nishinoya Yuu, Tanaka Ryuunosuke, Sawamura Daichi, Bokuto Koutarou [i had to do noya and tanaka cus they’re PERFECT for THIS] [also under the cut, i didn’t realize how long it was ahahah]

[reposting AGAIN because it’s not showing up in the tags ):<]

nishinoya yuu

okay okay let’s say you’re stuck at home and you’re like oh shit

i don’t have anymore pads or tampons

must be pretty shitty so anyway (im sorry im not judging because this deadass happened to me twice LOL)

anyway you decide to text your boyfriend bb noya to get you some

and he’s like !!! I HAVE A MISSION AND IVE GOTTA HELP MY GIRL

because ya know he’s a simp king for yOU his sunshine

so he runs to the store to get you whatever you use

but then he sees all these different types of tampons and pads

this boy is overwhelmed

but then there’s some people in the same aisle as him

a couple he notices, and the girl giggles while whispering to her boyfriend “wow what a sweet boyfriend he is.” and he gets so PROUD

and the girl probably realized how lost he is and just told him to ask you.

so anyways he grabs the ones you told him to and the girl also tells him to get her favorite snacks and chocolate and heat packs and just everything you’d ever need

and he gets them he doesn’t care about no price tag 😤😤 anything for his queen

so when he gets to your place with all of these bags you’re like overwhelmed but your heart just BURSTS because he’s pulling out your favorite snacks and every other item while saying “this is for you in case you want to snack.” or “these heat packs will help your cramps” or “your favorite ghibli movie so we can watch together”

he’s so sweet i love him so much <3

needless to say y’all spend the rest of the day cuddling and stuff <3

tanaka ryuunosuke

okay i just really like the idea of the boys going on a tampon/pad run for you so like

a lot like noya, he is a SIMP KING for YOU his GIRL and he’s on a mission

so when he see’s all of these different types, like noya he’s overWHELMED

so he deadass texts you “what size vagina are you” while sending a photo of all the tampons and pads

what a dumbass

but you love him and at least it got a good laugh out of ya especially with everything.

when he goes to check out he feels people staring at him and but unlike that one text of those series of boyfriends buying pads/tampons for their girlfriends ( i hope you guys know which one i’m talking about)

tanaka would be so proud like “hell yeah i got a girlfriend and hell yeah i’m doing this for her because i LOVE HER”

we stan one man and his name’s tanaka ryuunosuke

anyways on his way home he also stops by a boba store and gets you your favorite drink

how sweet i love him

he also decides to spend the rest of the day with you and y’all watch movies or just sleep and he does whatever he can to help you get through your period

also he might’ve bought you wAY too much

like deadass probably a years worth. his reasoning is that there’s so much BLOOD probably i love him

sawamura daichi

daichi goes dadchi well i mean he is daddy but ya know

anywayyyyyy you probably were complaining to him about how your period was coming soon but that it was also late but you were still having ghost cramps

daichi has a moment of fear because he thinks you’re pregnant but then he remembers that the last time y’all did the do was before your last period, y’all been busy with volleyball and school okay lol

so daichi asks if there’s anything he can do because he wants to help however he can

but you’re probably just shake your head knowing he’s pretty busy with captain duties

he is a responsible dad and you love him for that and you dont want to take him from his kids but he kinda like is hesitant to not do anything for you.

so he just asks you to wait for him after practice so that he could walk you home and he also invites you to watch them

so that’s how you find yourself suddenly very aware of your period coming like the niagra falls and you dash over to your bag to see if you have any pads and for some reason!!! you forgot to restock!!! so you ask kiyoko

and she gives you some of hers

and you rush to the restroom

daichi’s confused but when you get back he looks over at you and has a look of concern so you just smile and give him a nod and a thumbs up

so anyway practice ended earlier than usual (probably because Daichi asked Ukai, but you didn’t know that but you did have a feeling)

Daichi walked with you (and the team also walked with you lol) and he went ahead to the store on the way home and just bought ALL of your favorite snacks AND chocolate

Noya and Tanaka go full on sad mode because they were like “that’s what I WOULD DO if I had a girlfriend” like that one meme with timmy turner’s dad, i hope y’all knwo what im talking about luh mao

so he walks you ALL the way to your place and he decides to stay awhile and your mom LOVES him so she’s fine with him in your room

he cuddles with you the rest of the evening before he has to go home and he makes sure to give you a bunch of forehead kisses or any other type of kisses.

i luv him <3

bokuto koutarou

okay sorry i had to use that gif cus HE’S SO THICC HIS ARMS BRO sorry sorry okay anyways

so you’re probably in hella pain one day but like you’re trying to get through the day with classes

usually you do work after school to wait for bokuto but this was a particularly bad day

so when you told bokuto that you’re gonna head home early he got all emo mode

“wha- do you not love me” and he has those dot eyes and you start to feel bad but like you’re in PAIN but you also know that he doesn’t particularly have the skill to tell how you’re feeling and stuff

ya gotta be really good at open communication with this kid

but open communication is good in general so like ya know

anyway, you’ll probably just tell him that you’re feeling sick because of your period or akaashi might mention something if he’s there

but anyway bokuto becomes hella understanding and tells you to rest up

during practice bokuto gets a little bit worried because he also wants to be a good boyfriend, ya know, so he probably talks to akaashi about all these things he’s going to do (it’s a little bit ,,, much. very extra LMAO)

but akaashi stops him and tells him that something small and simple might be best for you

so, he just makes sure to get some of your favorite snacks and runs on over to your place as soon as practice ends

once he gets to your place and you notice that he got you snacks and such it probably just makes your kokoro go doki doki LMAO

he probably apologizes for not really like realizing you were tired and in pain but you just make grabby motions towards him and he goes :D and dives into your bed, gently

he’s such a baby he probably rests his head ontop of your chest and like his legs are slotted against yours and you just hug him while playing with his hair

he lets you talk about your day and he talks about his day and as the two of you guys talk slowly the two of you fall asleep.

a/n: like i said in pt. 1, i was gon make parts of it nsfw because ya know, sometimes a little spice can help yo cramps LOL so if anyone wants an nsfw version i can do it, also again if someone wants other characters too ill do it. also im so sorry i felt a little lack of motivation for bokuto’s part im a clown

#nishinoya yuu x reader #tanaka ryuunosuke x reader #sawamura daichi x reader #bokuto koutarou x reader #daichi x reader #nishinoya x reader #tanaka x reader #bokuto x reader #noya x reade #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu!!#a.writes #💜.noya #💜.tanaka #💜.bokuto #💜.daichi

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themilky-way · 4 years

Text

Connections {s.r}

gif credit: nobravery on tumblr!

pairing: spencer reid x female! reader

summary: you work at the BAU and are best friends with everybody, except spencer. you think he just doesn’t like you until one day, he proves you wrong.

warnings: just some minor hints of sadness, reader going through something, nothing major or specific.

author’s note: ah yes I did miss writing and spencer reid has my heart entirely. stay safe guys! ALSO I’M BARELY ON SEASON 3 SO YA’LL BETTER NOT SPOIL ANYTHING ISTG LMAO

-------

working in the BAU, your job was never boring. five months in had changed your outlook on almost anything and everything in your life, and had your mind now racing at what seemed like a million miles per minute. it was an exhilarating experience, regardless of how crude the crime scene could be, and it was about time you came to terms with that.

the BAU team was just as thrilled to have you with them as you were to join. nobody expected-or wanted- a new member, and were ready to reject your application when they finally met you for the interview. however, after you demonstrated to everyone that you could profile a serial killer based on only the amount of blood at the scene and position of the victim, everyone basically wanted to give you the “welcome tour” of the headquarters.

after you finally got an opportunity to get used to the layout of the job and your training ended, the team always looked forward to your “good morning” notes on their desk. being an early bird, you got there before everyone so you could get ahead on your reports, and always left small notes of encouragement on the person’s desk. it was a small and sweet gesture, and very much needed for the severity of the job.

“seriously, this girl must be doing some type of hypnosis or something to everybody here. why is it that every time I see her, I just wanna hug her, huh?”

“not hypnosis, morgan. just plain ol’ appreciation,” jj said. they were huddled around his desk as they all read a note that said: “always keep your head up, champ. we appreciate the work you do around here :)”

by then, he was the last of the bunch to read his card. however, he didn't have a gold star attached to it, which meant he wasn’t the “agent of the day” as you liked to phrase it. derek flipped the sticky note over and attempted to find it, but stopped when he realized he wasn’t it.

“wait, guys, so if I didn’t get a star, who did?” morgan asked, clearly puzzled. garcia shook her head and pouted, jj simply put a thumbs down, and prentiss muttered a “nope.” everyone knew hotch didn’t get it, because they figured he would call you in privately to thank you. everyone turned to look at you work in the conference room through the window. you were scribbling something on the whiteboard and had papers scattered everywhere on the table, unaware of the team’s puzzled expressions. at that moment, spencer walked through the double glass doors of the bureau and headed over to his desk as he normally would. as he did so, he found the team huddled together and looking at something, and when he followed their gaze he knew what this was about.

in truth, spencer never really cared for having a friendship with you. he looked at you as a coworker and just that, and developing a platonic relationship with you just wasn't anywhere in his mind. he did enjoy the words of encouragement and motivation every morning, though, and no matter how many phases of denial he went through, he looked for it as soon as he reached his desk.

“hey, guys, wanna hear something I discovered about dolphins last night?” spencer teased as he made his way over to morgan’s desk. nobody turned their heads from your direction, and it wasn't until reid mentioned your note that everyone stopped profiling you and turned their attention to him.

“you guys wanna hear-yeah that’s what I thought-wanna hear my note (y/n) left me?” he held up the sticky note and everyone nodded eagerly. he turned the note so he was able to read it, and began. “ ‘the world is smart, but you’re smarter. have a great day, reid!’ how cool is this!” he smiled and at that point so did everyone, when they realized that the note still had more to it.

“oh my god, reid! you got the gold star! congratulations sunshine,” garcia pointed out as she gave him a light punch on the shoulder. spencer’s mind started bouncing back and forth between thoughts when he looked at the tiny gold sticker below your comment. did this mean anything? should he mention it?

the answer to that was yes, he should, but was he going to? probably not. pats on the back were given as the team got up from morgan’s desk and headed to their own when hotch came out of his office and told everyone to meet in the conference room in five to look over a new case. reid, as he walked back to his pile of reports, looked at you working on your own. he never really thought of you as a friend, and didn't want to for that matter. but the longer he looked at you he started to realize that maybe befriending you wouldn't be so horrible. as everyone entered the room and gave you a hug or cheery greeting, spencer opted to sit at the other end of you. but one thing was for sure: his smile was the brightest one in the room.

the next few weeks went by quickly, and included a variety of new “agents’ of the day.” after reid, there was morgan, who practically wanted to kiss you after that. emily followed, who was beginning to turn into one of your closest friends. jj and garcia came next, and soon the four of you founded a girl’s night out every weekend.

however, them being the best profilers in the entire bureau, they noticed that the notes progressively stopped. the team realized something was off with you, and they noticed that your demeanor was different. you began to come later than you usually did, at one point even later than derek. your hairstyle changed to a messier bun, your desk was worse than reid’s, and no more cute notes were seen for almost two weeks.

“something’s wrong, you guys. she’s been here for months and she’s never once frowned or even forgot to put the cap back on her pen,” emily said, packing her files in her briefcase. jj nodded her head, “yeah I know, and I want to ask but I don’t want to make her uncomfortable. I mean, what if we’re reading too much into it?”

“reading into it? jj, we profile murderers who we’ve never even met, I’m pretty sure (y/n)’s going through something,” morgan stated, standing up from his chair and pushing it in adequately.

“we know one thing: when she’s ready to vent, we’ll be here. in the meantime, we should go home and get some rest. we fly out to oregon tomorrow,” hotch said. everyone agreed, and they stood up and gathered their belongings and headed for the exit door. they waved and said their goodbye’s to you, who was seated at the other end of the room.

you were the only one left at the bureau, and you were more tired than usual due to your lack of sleep recently. you closed your eyes, took a couple of deep breaths, and began to massage your temples with your pointer fingers. it’s been tough for you, taking care of your grandparents ever since they came to live with you. arguments with your mother always lead to the same thing: leaving. you loved them, and you adored having family with you, especially in a job like the one you had. but you had to sacrifice your sleep and wellbeing in order for them to be safe.

you were so concentrated in your thoughts that you didn’t hear footsteps coming down the stairs, moving towards your direction, and finally coming to a complete stop next to your desk. it wasn't until a soft voice broke you from your thoughts, or more so from your nap at that point.

“(y/n)?”

you lifted your head rapidly, and looked up to find the source of the voice, and when you did, you managed to slur, “reid, what the hell, I, uh, thought I was the only one left.

“no, I was just catching up on my reports and was about to go home. by the looks of it, you should too.”

“alright, catch you in the morning, spence. I still gotta finish this case file,” you were looking at him now, and as you spoke you gave a tiny nod to your opened manila folder. “wait you’re staying later? do you know how dangerous it is for girls of your type to be out at these hours of the night? I read a study once that determined women who wandered at night suffered the most danger between the hours of 1 a.m. to 4 a.m.. I mean you don't want to put yourself-”

“I'm not gonna be long, dr. reid, I think I’ll be fine,” you cut him off mid fact. you returned to your paperwork and picked up your pen to write some notes on the margin, and when you looked back up a couple minutes later, you found reid staring at you, confusion clearly manifesting over his features.

‘I suggest offering you a seat, sir. that way you can look at me in distress as long as you like,” you let yourself chuckle a little bit, and even though it made spencer want to laugh too, he restrained himself and asked you what had troubled him for weeks now.

“(y/n), what’s going on? you’re not the same since garcia got the last morning note from you. seriously, I-I’m here to help you.”

dropping your pen, you swiveled your chair so you were in his direction and looked up at him to answer him. “in all honesty, and by no means full offense, I don’t think you care what’s going on with me.”

in his mind, reid was going nuts, and his silence? not helping very much. all he could do was look down at you with a shocked expression and his mouth opened and closed before he finally rebutted your statement.

“(y/n), I’m sorry I made it seem that way. I really am and the truth is I didn’t really care for your notes at first until I stopped receiving them.” he crouched down now to level with your height on the chair, a hand laying on his knee and the other on the ground for balance.

“I didn’t really care for a friend, until I realized I wanted your friendship. I never even thanked you for giving me the privilege of being ‘agent of the day.’”

you realized he meant it, and it wasn’t some cheesy reponse you were so used to getting. he felt it, and you began to realize you could also trust him even a little.

“thanks, reid. sorry for lashing out too, it’s just things haven’t been so easy back home. do you mind?”

“of course not. I’m all ears, (y/n).” you nodded and thanked him, standing up from your chair and kneeling down to ultimately sit down criss cross on the ground. he did the same as you, and his attention was fully yours.

you told him everything that had happened; the fights with your mom, your grandparents moving in, your lack of sleep and how you felt. you vented to him about almost everything in your life and he listened like his life depended on it. at the end, you were crying a little no matter how hard you tried not to. amidst everything, he had pulled you into an awkward sort of hug, considering your position and the fact he doesn't give much physical affection to people. nonetheless, he gave you the comfort you needed and you valued it.

he pulled away suddenly, and lifted himself off the ground a little to get his phone from his pocket. he asked you to get yours, and you did so by reaching over to the top of your desk. the both of you exchanged phones and he wrote his rather rapidly, you still trying to think about your own area code by the time he was finished.

you exchanged phones again, and when you grabbed yours from his hand, he held on to it as well. before he let go, he looked down at the ground and then landed on your hand on the phone.

“you can call me whenever you want. even if you don’t have a reason too.”

his eyes flicked up to your semi-red eyes, and he smiled softly. you did as well, and he felt small butterflies forming in his tummy when you did. spencer reid didn’t care for affection, nor for personal connections with anyone. but perhaps you were beginning to turn into the only exception.

and he didn't really mind it at all.

#spencer reid x reader #spencer reid #spencer reid fanfiction #matthew gray gubler #criminal minds #criminal minds fanfiction #spencer reid fluff #derek morgan #shemar moore #jennifer jareau #aj cook #penelope garcia #kirsten vangsness #emily prentiss #paget brewster #aaron hotchner #thomas gibson

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ajbwasntwriting · 3 years

Text

Daughter!Reader x Negan, Reader x Daryl: Chapter 6. No. 12

First | Previous | Next

(I’m running out of relevent gifs)Okay this seems very short to me so I’m gonna try post another one in the next few days. I’d like to say a sincere thank you to everyone who’s following this series. I know the numbers are small but to have anyone following what I write is amazing and the best thing that’s happened to me this year. Thank you <3

I’ll only post more chapters if previous chapters get a good reaction so if you enjoy this please heart it, reblog it, and/or reply to it. Interaction inspires.

if you wish to be added to the tag list please dm me. All chapters can be found under the tag AJ’s Negan’s Daughter AU

Walking through the city Daryl took a moment to look in the direction of your apartment. He hadn’t seen you in a while since the museum trip was taking up so much of his time.

“Is everything alright?” Carol called to him from her horse.

“Yeah,” he said then sped up ahead of the group. He felt he would have to see you after this. Just to check in on you. He’d grown to love visiting you. Your apartment had become his little escape from how mad the world had gotten, though he’d never say that or mention you to the group. He knew in this world he had to be ready to lose that comfort in an instant.

Back at the apartment you woke slowly, your head throbbing, your back aching, and feeling unnaturally cold. You looked around, finding yourself in Daryl’s room tied to a leg of the bed. Across from you was the wardrobe with a mirror embedded in the door. Blood had flowed down your head and over your face, and a cloth gag in your mouth. Through an open door you see people walking around your apartment. A tall woman noticed you, her face breaking into a wicked smile. She strut into the room.

“Well, Well, Well,” she knelt down in front of you, gently tugging the gag from your mouth. “You’re finally awake. Ya know, where we were tracking Dixon, None of us thought we’d run into Negan’s princess.”

You stared at her as she talked, your eyes still adjusting. She was dressed like a saviour but you didn’t recognise her as one of your father’s people. “Who are you?” you whispered, your throat dry. She laughed at you.

“Really?” she chuckled. She reached forward and grabbed your throat “How much of my booze did you drink and you don’t even have the decency to remember my name.”

You thought for a moment longer, “Worker Twelve,” you spoke, shocked that a worker had found you “You're a code orange now?” she took her hand away from your throat, realisation dawning on her.

“You don’t know,” she gasped. She was called out of the room by another person. She quickly pushed the gag back into your mouth before taking off.

Leaving you alone again your mind began to race. Didn’t know what? What had happened in Sanctuary? Why were the workers walking around outside now? Was your dad okay? You began to move your wrists, noticing they’d been tied together with some rope, and not very well as luck would have it.

You stopped when she walked back in. “Keep an eye out. They come back this way, we move.” she went back to her place in front of you, smiling at you. “Look, I don’t wanna kill you” she spoke to you “Well, not badly. We know you’re valuable to Daryl.” Your eyes widened “So we’re gonna use you. See, we don’t like the idea that some prisoner that killed a bunch of our people is now our boss. So you’re gonna play damsel in distress and when he comes to get you, we’ll kill him. And you if you don’t play well.” She reached up and patted your cheek, making soothing shushing sounds, “No need to look so scared. This is just how things are now.” You jerked your head away from her hand. “Fuck you” you tried to curse through the gag, though clear enough to hear. The smile fell from her face and she slapped you.

“You’ve got no power anymore Princess” she stood up and left the room, closing the door in the process.

‘Daryl is in charge at Sanctuary?’ you thought. The thought of such a kind man as a saviour didn’t sit right, which made you refuse to believe it. What was his plan? Did he know who you were? Was the past few months just a plot to get you back to the Sanctuary. Where was your dad? Was he even still alive? You tried to push it all to the back of your head to focus on what was happening right now. Regardless of what 12 was going to do to Daryl, she was going to kill you. Whether she said it or not didn’t matter. She had made it clear she only held anger towards you.

You tried to pick up the leg of the bed to maybe move the rope under it but the bed proved too heavy and your hands tied to high. You moved around while looking around the room to see if there was anything to help you. You saw a pack of lighters on the bedside table next to the top of the bed and began to move down, pushing your arms back to move the length of your body down.

You got your feet either side of the nightstand and began to pull it towards you, tipping it over. The lighters fell down along with a half-full ashtray. You kicked the lighters up to you, getting onto your knees to get it back to your hands. With a lighter in hand you began to burn away at the rope burning your hand and shirt in the process. When the rope finally broke you pulled your shirt out and threw it out the window. You opened the wardrobe and found a black shirt that you had stored in there for Daryl’s next visit, along with a pair of boots and a canister of fuel.

You looked at the window, with no fire escape and the gentle reminder you were 6 stories up. To the side you saw the drain and came up with a quick plan. As quietly as you could, You lined up cloths from the window to the door, pouring the fuel over them then leaving the canister by the door on it’s side so the remaining fuel could seep under it. You sat in the window sill, lighter in hand, breathing deeply and contemplating how stupid this escape plan was.

“What’s that?” You heard. Quickly you lit the fuel soaked cloths and hung outside the window, hanging to the window sill with your fingers. You felt the heat on your hands envelope the room, spurring you onwards as you moved towards the drain pipe. Your fingers shook as you clasped your hands around the pipe, between the burns on your palms and the cold of the pipe it took everything to hold on. You momentarily wished you had kept the gag in your mouth so you had something to bite into, but your bottom lip would have to do. You moved down rather slowly, occasionally looking down to see how many more stories to go.

“Shit” you cursed out loud when during one of these checks you noticed walkers coming down the alley, but you still had little under two stories to go. They were staring at you and would no doubt be there by the time you reached the bottom.

With little to no option, you let go of the pipe and fell the remaining distance. On the fall you felt a bone in your lower leg break. You fell to the ground and yelped out in pain, urging the dead to find you faster. Their groans made you push on, using the wall to raise yourself up. Between a mixture of limping and hoping, you desperating moved away from the dead, more and more joined up . You didn’t dare look back, working through your agony. Between the agony of a broken leg, the blood loss, and concussion, the chilly early spring air was all that was keeping you going. You didn’t know where you were going, but it was away from the dead.

Projectiles shot past you, throwing you off your balance as you fell to the ground. You pulled yourself up, looking back to see walker after walker drop. When they all fell you looked for your saviours. You see a group of men and women, looking down at you. A woman in a brown ten-gallon hat steps forward, bow drawn at you.

“Who are you?!” she demands. You desperately try to catch your breath “What are you doing here!?”

“Hey!” another shouts from the back. Daryl emerges, running to the woman. “It’s okay, Maggie.” he said, hand on her shoulder. “I know her, it’s okay.” That’s the last you hear before you pass out on the concrete.

~ Tag List ~

@buckbarnesslut

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jjmaybanksblog · 4 years

Text

On My Own- Rafe Cameron

(Gif credit @popemaybank )

Summary: After you raised your child by yourself for the last 3 years, Rafe comes to his senses to finally become the dad he never was.

Word count: 1,321

Warnings: Teen pregnancy

Y/N your name

Y/C/N your child's name

Rafe Cameron sat at the family dinner table, poking and prodding at his steak and broccoli. He carelessly flipped a piece of broccoli around his plate as Rose forced conversation with his younger sister and father.

"Wheezie, anything new today?" Rose asked from the end of the table, sipping from her glass of wine. "Normal day today. Then I ran into an old friend of ours- Y/N." Wheezie smirked as Rafe choked on air after hearing your name. His parent's faces lit up after hearing your name, you were Rafe's favorite girlfriend.

You treated Rafe and his family with so much respect, you loved him for everything he was. "Oh my goodness! I haven't heard that name in what feels like so long. What did she say?"

Rafe took a deep breath to prepare for his sister's words, "she said she's been doing well, having some family issues though." A smirk was evident in her tone as she shoved a piece of meat into her mouth. "Rafe, have you talked to her about that? Do you know if she's okay." Ward prodded at the boy.

"Uh no actually. I haven't actually spoken to her in a few years-" he was cut off by Wheezie announcing, "since he got her pregnant." The only sound that was heard was his dad's utensils clattering to the ground and his step mother choking on her wine.

"Rafe, is that true?" His mouth opened, words trying to form however he only sat there like a fish out of water. "You got her pregnant?! What were you thinking?" His father yelled, standing up at his spot.

"That's the issue dad I wasn't thinking!" He screamed back at Ward, standing up from his spot as well. "Both of you knock it off! Rafe, when did you find out she...she was pregnant?" Rose asked, pinching the bridge of her nose.

"3 years ago..." He trailed off, thinking about how badly things between them ended. Ward loudly exhaled as Rose took the napkin from her lap and wiped her mouth. "I expect you to go over to her house tomorrow and speak to her about this."

He simply nodded his head as his parents walked away from the table. Wheezie pursued her lips together picking at the food on her plate. Rafe walked up into his room and threw himself onto his bed, a million thoughts running through his head.

The Next Day

You were watching Y/C/N play with her stuffed animals, giggling and cooing at the elephant one she's had since she was a baby. She was an energetic little one that wasted no time in draining your battery, but you would do anything for her.

Your family was rather supportive when they found out you were pregnant, shocked nonetheless, but they knew you were frantic and needed any help you could get. Your mom or dad would come over to watch her when you didn't get any sleep for multiple days straight. Your sister donated you toys from when she had her kids. The only thing missing from people helping out was your baby's father.

You knew Rafe was the father of your baby. He was the only person you had any sort of intimacy with. The moment you thought you were pregnant, everything went fuzzy. You prayed you weren't, you were only a junior in high school and Rafe was a senior. You didn't want to have to leave the school and have rumors about you spread like wildfire. But you also knew Rafe couldn't bare to have the truth spread about him getting someone younger pregnant.

When you took the test, you nearly threw up then and there. You had no idea of how to tell him that he was the father. You knew he was too young, you knew he wouldn't want to have that burden on his chest, but you told him anyway. And that's when everything went even more downhill.

He left after hesitating for a moment his final words being, "I'm sorry." Since then you woke up by yourself, each day your stomach slowly getting bigger and bigger. Your hormones raging, one minute you would be crying because you were alone, the next minute you were angry because of how easy Rafe left you.

The day you gave birth was the best thing that's ever happened to you, you had given birth to your beautiful daughter, but had to cut the umbilical cord by yourself and had no signature for the father on her birth certificate.

These memories slip your mind when your front doorbell rings. You keep and eye on your girl as you open the front door. Your heart immediately feels like it drank 20 cups of coffee, your heartbeat beginning to pound. "Rafe?" Your mouth failed to fully enunciate the syllables in his name.

"Hi Y/N..." He wanted to get down on his knees and just apologize as loudly as he could, but he was frozen in his spot. "Listen I have to say this because right now I honestly feel like puking not gonna lie. I am so... here I go. I am so fucking sorry I didn't stay. I'm so sorry I didn't take care of you, help you, be the boyfriend you needed me to be. I ran like the fucking coward I am, and I know there's no way I can take back these 3 years of not being here, and I know there's no way me saying sorry will heal anything, but fuck I want you to know how truly sorry I am and I accept that I fucked up horribly. To both you and your child."

You stared down at the ground before muttering, "I raised our daughter, by myself... but she's your child too you know." You knew he was sorry, you knew he was terrified when you told him. He was a teenager, he had his whole life ahead of him and he wasn't ready for this kind of responsibility. You don't blame him, you see the reason why he ran, you just wish he didn't.

His ears perked up at your phrase, he nervously ran his hand through his hair, "do- do you think I can see..." he slowly trailed off, hoping you would catch on. You bit down harshly on your lip before inviting him inside your house.

You sat down on the couch as Rafe slowly walked in. "Come here Y/c/n!" Your daughter giggled loudly as she waddled over to your spot. You easily picked her up and sat her down on your thigh, softly bouncing it up and down. Rafe sat across from you and your child, his eyes not believing the sight in front of him. She truly looked like a mini version of you.

Y/c/n started mumbling a bunch of words that didn't make sense together, until she asked the question, "who dis?" Your voice got high pitched as you said, "this is daddy!" Rafe smiled brightly at the sound of that, his daughter giggled loudly as her eyes widened. "Daddy?!"

"Yeah! Hey baby girl, wow you're beautiful. You look just like your mama." Y/c/n crawled out of your lap and plopped herself right onto his. One of her hands reached up and began to play with his hair, the other held on tightly to his index finger.

Your eyes began to water at the interaction between the two, wishing that he was there since the beginning. "God Y/N... I'm so sorry for everything. I'm sorry it took me so long to realize what I was missing out on. I know it's so late but I will do anything and everything I can to take care of you both and love you both unconditionally."

The corners of your mouth tugged up as a tear rolled down your cheek. "Welcome to the family, Cameron."

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twdeadlysins · 4 years

Text

Don’t Listen

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Reader

Word Count: 2.9k

Summary: The Governor wants information and will do whatever it takes to get it from you and Daryl. // Set during Season 3

Request: Could I request a Daryl x Reader with the prompt “How come she loves you?” Where basically the Governor has captured them both at some point during season 3 and is trying to get them both to talk. Daryl and the reader can each hear what is happening to the other, and the Governor tries some emotional manipulation by saying the prompt. Then Rick&Co come to rescue them and they have a tearful reunion. If you decide to write this thank you! Your fanfics are the best ❤❤ // @harpersmariano

Warnings: angst, fluff, abuse (physically + mentally), the usual walking dead themes, and possible typos by yours truly

A/N: I apologize for the wait! I changed this fic SOOO many times because there were so many routes I could take with it.

The gifs I use aren’t mine, so all credit goes to their respective owners.

MASTERLIST

The constant shouts, grunts, and the deafening sound of fists colliding with skin made you viciously thrash against your restraints. The rope that bound your wrists was harshly rubbing against your sweaty skin as you used all your strength to lift them, hoping to somehow break free.

It was useless, you were very aware.

There was no way you could tear the material just by tugging on it, but you refused to sit there and do nothing while Daryl was relentlessly getting beat on for information.

You and the hunter were on a supply run specifically looking for baby formula for the newest addition to the group, while also keeping an eye out for anything else that could be useful. After you had walked out the store with what you needed and some other necessities, you were met with a gun and a familiar face.

Merle Dixon.

The presumed dead redneck had grabbed you and placed the weapon to the side of your temple before Daryl stepped out the door, having no choice but to abide by his brother’s commands.

You arrived at a town and were discreetly guided to a building where they separated you from your lover. The wall was super thin, so you heard every sound that was emitted from the room. You’d bet that you could hear a pin drop from where you were seated.

Silence.

The methods of getting information were no more, which left you confused as you halted your struggle. Were you supposed to feel relieved or worried? Did they leave and give Daryl a break or did they end it and kill him?

Before you could ask if he was okay, there was sudden noise of someone fiddling with the door knob to unlock it. Your head whipped to the sound that was once trained on the wall beside you, waiting with an anxious, but curious gaze as to who would step through. The numerous failed attempts of breaking free, and the unknown of who was behind the door and what would happen to you made your chest heave, replacing air faster than the punches that were thrown in the other room.

When the door swiftly opened, your blood began to boil, orbs filling with rage that replaced your anxiety. The amount of hatred that spilled from you prompted you to clench your teeth, refraining yourself from snarling at the man that strided in the room with pride and a smile plastered on his face.

He pulled a wooden chair out with the back facing you, situating himself before he nonchalantly rested his forearms on the top.

“Got yer panties in a bunch, sweetheart?”

“Shut up, Merle.”

You had no patience for his bullshit and since he was in such a fantastic mood, you assumed Daryl was alright. Despite Merle letting them torment his brother, he would be devastated if he was hurt beyond return.

His features crinkled with amusement as a chuckle rumbled through him, which earned you to scoff and roll your eyes, not finding anything humorous.

“Yer a feisty one, can’t believe my baby brother got a fine piece of ass like yerself.” He laughed once again, making you furrow your brows as a question swirled in your head, despite wanting to drop kick him for that comment.

“Speakin’ of your brother, why are you letting them do this to him? Thought you were supposed to protect him? You're his big brother.”

His smirk morphed into confidence. “M’baby brother tough, but he’ll eventually cave. Always does. We were plannin’ on robbin’ the group blind and leavin’ before y’all even knew what hit ya. But y’all left me on that roof before we could, leavin’ me to do this.” Merle lifted his arm, presenting the creation that was made to replace his hand. “So I doubt it’ll take long for him to rat where yer keepin’ each other warm at night,” he said through a smile.

He was alive, that was your confirmation. You didn’t care about their plan, it wasn’t news to you. Daryl had admitted their intention with the group to you during the winter months when you had to travel to different places to find shelter.

Your head tilted as you hummed in disagreement. “Don’t think so. Daryl isn’t the quiet, obedient follower you knew — that you turned him into. He’s helpful, reliable, strong, smart, a leader, and much more, but most importantly he’s himself — something he masked to please you.”

Before the older Dixon could retort, a muffled cough came from the other room followed by a voice. The voice of his torturer. He was elated that Daryl was finally awake and ready to resume their previous activities, except physical torture wasn’t on the agenda anymore it seemed.

“So you and — what’s her name?”

Nothing.

You could only imagine Daryl’s reaction. He was very protective over you, so you knew he was clamping his jaw shut — trying his hardest not to give in.

“Ah! Y/N, that’s it. You and her a couple?”

It fell quiet once again, which only encouraged the man to push further.

“Gotta speak up, Daryl,” his voice boomed. “Cause I’m gonna take your silence as a no and walk in that room. Show her who a real man is.” His voice was taunting and whispery towards the end, making you assume he moved to speak behind the archer, right next to his ear.

“Don’ ya touch her,” Daryl grunted and you heard the chair scrape against the floor.

You were his weakness and it was a conflicting feeling.

He wouldn’t let anyone hurt you, he would do anything to protect you — he loved you. Daryl didn’t have to say those three words for you to know, he easily did it by his actions or with different words like the ones he just spoke.

But if the wrong people knew, you were in a great deal of trouble like you were in now.

The man in charge was going to use your relationship to his advantage, to get what he wanted. Although you didn’t want him to know where your family was, you also didn’t want Daryl to get hurt anymore than he already had — but you’d have to cooperate for that to happen.

“Just gimme what I want n’ I won’t touch a hair on her pretty lil’ head.”

You closed your eyes, hoping he wouldn’t reveal the location. Although you had faith in Daryl that he wouldn’t utter a word, there was a chance he would confess so nothing was inflicted upon you. If the roles were reversed, you would do the same, so you didn’t blame him one bit.

When his offer didn’t receive an answer, you let go the breath you were holding and slowly opened your eyes, giving Merle a side-eye when he tsked and shook his head that his brother still wasn’t giving in.

Before you could make a snide comment towards the one-handed man, you heard the leader tell Daryl that he had enough, he wasn’t going to wait anymore — that he was going to pay you a visit. That had finally gotten a rise out of your boyfriend, he was yelling and violently twisting in his seat, spilling threats.

“It’s okay, Daryl!” You had screamed over his protests and brutal promises, you couldn’t let him cave because it was your turn. He was strong, he took the physical pain while you dealt with it mentally and emotionally. The roles were going to be flipped, but it didn’t matter, you still weren’t going to say anything.

“Don’t give in, don’t give in for me, please,” you begged, not getting an answer — just silence. It was better that way, he wasn’t stopping it — wasn’t offering his compliance to the leader.

Merle stood up and turned the chair around to face you before opening the door, finally revealing the face behind the voice that hurt the man you loved. The older Dixon left, leaving you alone and for once in your life, you wanted Merle to stay.

The man in charge introduced himself as the Governor while he slowly stepped to take a seat in front of you, acting as if he didn’t just come out of the room Daryl was in — the room that he beat and taunted him in.

Before the so called Governor could continue, you interrupted him, tired of the long game. “I don’t care what you have to say. I’m not going to tell you jackshit, so go ahead and do whatever you gotta do to me.”

He chuckled with his arms crossed, his eyes crinkling with amusement. “Is that what you want?” He curiously asked, getting up and squatting down to your eye level with a smirk still etched on his face.

Smiling sadistically, you leaned forward as much as you could, mere inches from his face. “Can’t let my boyfriend get all the fun, now can I?”

Of course you didn’t want to get tortured, but you weren’t going to let him think he had all the power — he wasn’t going to get anything from hurting you. You were scared, but you weren’t going to show him — you were going to mask it.

It went on for what felt like hours. The Governor had punched, slapped, and cut while he berated you, your group, your relationship, and Daryl. In the beginning you retorted back to him, but the energy you once had dwindled.

After a few good hits, blood filled your mouth, making you choke on your own words despite the amount of times you had spit it out. You had heard Daryl shout for him to stop, but your torturer paid no mind to him. His pleas were soon drowned out by the thumping in your ears and the Governor screaming that you were nothing, that the group was better off and weren’t looking for you.

The Governor stumbled back as he tried to regain his breath, leaving you on the ground still tied to the chair. Once you weakly turned your head to the side to get rid of the liquid that collected in your mouth, you let out a laugh. “Is… is that all you got?”

He let out a grunt before heading out the door.

“Nope, I got somethin’ else.”

You heard the door to the other room open followed by a chuckle.

“Y/N is something else, I’ll tell you. What I don’t get is why she’s with someone like you?”

“Shut up,” you muttered under your breath.

“How come she loves you?” The Governor questioned. “She got tortured ‘cause of you — ‘cause you wouldn’t comply.”

“Shut up!” you weakly defended before coughing up more blood.

“Something so simple and you couldn’t do it to spare her the pain! It’s all your fault, so why does she love you? Someone who let this happen to her? Someone who’s weak and not worth a damn of her time!” He screamed, getting louder with each sentence he spoke.

“Don’t listen! Don’t listen to him, Daryl! This isn’t your fault!”

“You’re weak — you’re a coward — you don’t deserve her or the blood she’s spilled for you! Why does she love you, huh?”

What you didn’t expect was Daryl’s response.

“I don’ know why!”

You froze at his answer, not understanding why he would say something like that. Did he really believe that he wasn’t worthy of your love? That he wasn’t good enough?

Your heart shattered at the insecurities he held.

“Merle,” you heard the Governor say before silence followed.

Next thing you knew, the older Dixon entered and paused, taking in your state before picking up your chair. He sliced your restraints and gently grabbed onto your arm, dragging you out the room.

Another door opened and you caught a glimpse of Daryl at the end of a long table. He was tied to a chair with fresh tears streaming down his battered face, he looked so tired and worn, your heart ached at the sight — the same for him seeing what The Governor had done to you.

Unknownst to you, the Governor gave Merle a look and the redneck reluctantly pushed you onto your knees, making you fumble, but you never tore your eyes off of Daryl. The Governor told Merle to leave as a gun was cocked and you didn’t have to take a peek to know that the weapon was pointed down at your head.

“No!” Daryl cried out, wide-eyed at the scene in front of him.

“Tell me where you and your group are staying at or I’ll blow her brains out,” he threatened.

The hunter slowly connected his teary orbs with yours.

“Don’t tell him. It’s okay,” you put on a smile, despite the tears that wanted to spill. “I love you, Daryl. Don’t you ever forget that.”

You closed your eyes, waiting for the bastard to pull the trigger, but Daryl hurriedly shouted out the location.

You let out a breath and cried, trying to muffle your sobs with your hand.

You weren’t mad at Daryl or disappointed, you would’ve done the same if a gun was pointed at his head. All you felt was relief. Death was far from what you wanted, but if that was the outcome to protect Daryl and the group — so be it.

“The prison? That place is overrun. How’d you manage to clear that place out? How many people are in your group?” The Governor asked in bewilderment.

“Eleven,” Daryl replied, not skipping a beat.

The Governor was amused by that number, not believing eleven people cleared the prison to be suitable to live in. He removed the gun aimed at your head, switching on the safety before placing it back in his holster.

“Kill them both and don’t tell Merle,” you heard him order someone when he opened the door.

Although your body screamed at you not to, you pushed yourself up and sprinted towards Daryl, throwing your arms around his neck to clutch onto him. Your fingers were carded in his hair as he buried his face into the spot between your neck and shoulder, apologizing to you over and over again.

You withdrew and grabbed his face, forcing him to look at you with his guilt-ridden eyes.

“You have nothing to be sorry for, you hear me? You’re the strongest, bravest person I know and I’m lucky to call you mine. I love you,” you assured him before pressing your lips to his.

Once you rested your forehead on his, a hand snaked around your waist and vigorously pulled you back, making you shout in denial.

“Let me go!”

You thrashed against the man that held you while another man cut Daryl free to take him too, but the hunter was quick and punched the guy in the face.

The man that had you in his grasp hesitated, conflicted on whether he should help with Daryl or continue taking you. You used the opportunity to elbow him in the stomach before grabbing his arm, twisting it back and kicking his leg so he would kneel down.

Before you knew it, two more men with guns came into the room and pointed it at you, forcing you to let go of the advantage you both had.

They compelled both of you to your knees next to each other and that was when you knew that you were done for.

That this was it.

“I love ya,” Daryl whispered and you both instinctively laced your hands together before your vision of each other was blocked by a bag going over your head.

The grip he had on your hand was strong, but eventually they pried your hands apart and you whimpered, instantly missing his touch. Despite the life-threatening predicament you were in, you felt safe by the hunter’s side. Not being able to see him or feel his warmth stripped that security away as they began tying your hands together.

You could hear Daryl grunt and struggle, not making it easy on your captors as someone guided you forward and you assumed out of the room before something loud went off, making everyone halt their movements and panic. You yanked the bag off your head to see smoke and — Rick?

He grabbed your bounded hands and cut them before quickly taking you out onto the street, sneaking down it with the others close behind to an empty building.

Once you entered the vacant building, your legs gave out, causing you to make contact with the floor. Daryl was by your side in a matter of seconds, checking you out and making sure you were okay.

The look on his face made you caress his cheek, his eyes held guilt, so you shook your head, silently communicating with him. It caused him to divert his orbs to Rick who was trying to come up with a plan as he cautiously looked out the window.

The events of what happened and what could’ve been caught up with you as you stared at Daryl. You choked back a sob at the thought of losing him mere moments ago and wrapped your arms around his neck, burying your head in his neck.

He wasted no time in securing one arm around your waist and the other to cradle the back of your head. He soothed circles on your back and pressed a lingering kiss on the side of your temple while Rick and the others decided on what to do next.

You both almost met death and the last thing you wanted to do was to let go of the love of your life, but that was what motivated you to push forward.

To live and fight for not only yourself, but for Daryl and your family so you would never have to let go.

TAGLIST: @jodiereedus22 @sourwolf-sterek32 @haleypearce @gruffle1 @lonewolf471 @dashesoflipstick @aristocracy-y @harpersmariano @maydayfigment @yes-sir-hotchner

#daryl dixon x reader #daryl dixon #daryl dixon x you #daryl dixon x y/n #daryl dixon x reader insert #daryl dixon fanfiction #daryl dixon fanfic #twd fanfiction #the walking dead fanfiction #twd #twd daryl dixon #the walking dead #amc the walking dead #twd oneshot #twd one shot #f.

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amphtaminedreams · 4 years

Text

Farewell to Spooky Season, AHS Style: Lookbook no.12

Hi to anyone reading,

Happy belated Halloween!

I capitalise it because if I'm gonna recognise any day as sacred, it’s the spookiest one of the year! Halloween 2020 obviously hasn’t been as exciting as usual, parties and club nights being banned has meant there’s been far less opportunities to dress up, but I still managed to get out for the night before they announced the upcoming second lockdown and do a couple of spooky movie nights (and carve a pumpkin!)!

I originally intended for this lookbook to be last minute halloween costume inspo but I was lazy and didn’t manage to get it out on time-a lot of these looks minus the makeup and maybe an accessory or two could work on any day or night out so I thought I’d go ahead and post it now anyway. Celebrating the fashion moments of American Horror Story is something I’ve wanted to do for a while; it’s probably not the first show you’d think of for sartorial inspiration but Mr. Ryan Murphy has fucking fantastic taste in stylists and the first five seasons of AHS in particular, which I’ll be focussing on in this post, have given us SO many amazing looks. The man may be guilty of many things-subjecting us to the character of Will Schuester, trying to turn Richard Ramirez into a thirst trap, embarrassing everyone who raved about how good Scream Queens was when he wrote season 2-but costume related laziness is not one of them. We see more consistency in a Ryan Murphy character’s wardrobe than we do in their story arcs and I respect that because honestly, as much as I love joining in when it comes to ripping into his ability to cohesively bring an AHS season to a close when it airs, I’d probably be the same; if you put Lady Gaga in front of me and told me to write her lines I’d probably end up getting overly invested in what her character was going to be wearing in the scene too.

So! Enough Ryan Murphy bashing from me! I’ll get on with it! Starting with 3 season 1 inspired looks:

Murder House: Elizabeth Short, Tate Langdon and Violet Harmon

-striped jumper from caitlinlark on Depop, kick flare jeans from ellagray-

When it comes to reflecting on season 1 of American Horror Story, all I can say do is thank the internet overlords that Tumblr has moved on from the romanticising school shooters and wearing normal people scare me tops phase to instead collectively taking the piss out of the “GO AWAY, TATE!”, “YOU’RE ALL THAT I WANTTT! YOU’RE ALL THAT I HAVEEE!” exchange.

In terms of fashion *moments*, whilst season 1 doesn’t stand out as much as the seasons that come after, Violet and Tate’s wardrobes did give birth to a bit of a 90s grunge renaissance with their oversized knits and faded jeans and layering of textures. It did also give us good costumes in the form of Alexandra Breckenridge’s Moira O’Hara and Mena Suvari’s portrayal of the Black Dahlia, Elizabeth Short; unfortunately, I didn’t have a slutty maid costume lying around so I did the best I could at giving the outfit Elizabeth wears when she makes that fateful visit to the Murder House a modern, more party appropriate update.

In terms of season rankings, Murder House isn’t my favourite. It starts off really great but lulls a bit towards the end and I could never get behind Violet and Tate as a couple because you know, one of them is a school shooter who sexually assaults the other’s mum, and that’s a hurdle that I think most couples might struggle to get over irl. That being said, it was the season that started it all and showcased some of the most innovative writing and directing on TV, and it opened up a spot for horror on primetime television which as far as I know was kind of unheard of before then. Back when I first watched it, I had no idea what to expect not only because I’d never seen horror in a serial format but also because it seemed to be able to get away with the kind of storylines you’d expect network executives to fire people over. It introduced us to Jessica Lange and Sarah Paulson and Evan Peters and Denis O’Hare who would go on to make the show what it is today and more importantly, through Jessica’s glorious portrayal of Constance Langdon, provide us with an endlessly versatile meme format for this trying time.

Asylum: ‘60s Lana Winters, ‘70s Lana Winters, and Sister Mary Eunice McKee

-afghan coat from louisemarcella on Depop, red AA skater dress from julietramage, pink gingham co-ord from zshamim-

I think we can all agree: Asylum would’ve been a perfect series of television if it wasn’t for the completely unnecessary alien storyline. Like, I get that they fit in with the whole good vs. evil theme as a kind of non-biblical alternative to the idea of a higher, all-powerful being but there was already so much going on that it just wasn’t needed. Aside from that, I think the general consensus amongst watchers of the show is that Asylum has the best writing of any season and I think I’d tend to agree. It’s not my favourite because it’s too depressing to rewatch but if we’re talking the first time round, this is the series that had me hooked. Lana Winters?

Iconic.

Sister Mary Eunice? Iconic. The Name Game? Iconic. Remember when you couldn’t go a day on Facebook without seeing that one photo of Naomi Grossman as Pepper used as the go to “what I really look like” photo in one of those “expectation vs. reality” style posts on your newsfeed? Those were simpler times.

Because this season was mostly situated within the hospital, we didn’t get that many proper outfits but when we did, they were stunning; if I had to state my absolute favourite AHS character of the entire show I’d probably go with Lana Winters and the part her wardrobe played in her characterisation would 100% play a part in that. The late 60s/early 70s was such a wonderful period for fashion and through her character we get to see both of those explored a little. Of course there’s also *that* Sister Mary Eunice scene with the red slip dress and suspenders too which yes, could be a perfect halloween costume, but I also strongly believe should be a perfectly acceptable outfit for any day of the year.

Coven: Misty Day, Madison Montgomery, and Zoe Benson

-chiffon dress from rags_to_riches on Depop, pinstripe corset from hanpiercey, and tennis skirt from mollie_morton-

I hate to be a basic bitch but I have to say it: Coven is my favourite season of American Horror Story. Once you get over the complete waste of Evan Peters’ acting capabilities that resulted from the *choice* to have him play Kyle, the unnecessary rehash of the Evan/Taissa pairing from season 1 in what I can only assume was an attempt to capitalise on the popularity of the questionable Tate/Violet relationship, and the subsequent sacrifice of any interesting character arc we could’ve foreseen for Zoe Benson beyond her obsessing over a resurrected, non-verbal frat boy, it’s a perfect season. A supreme (heh) balance of horror, humour, and character drama, as well as the stunning aesthetics and forever quotable dialogue, make it my go-to season if I’m ever considering a rewatch. And if you disagree, let me jog your memory with the most mainstream (not to get all “normal people scare me” and suggest AHS is not a mainstream show, I literally just mean in the sense that even those who have never watched the show will have seen this) reaction GIF set any FX show has even spawned:

Buzzfeed employees had a field day, Emma Roberts enthusiasts (I mean me) finally saw her cemented as the pop culture icon Scream Queens has since showed us she deserves to be (because not enough people have seen Unfabulous, Nancy Drew or Scream 4) and the gays everywhere rejoiced at the year’s worth of meme fodder they’d been provided with. It was Madison Montgomery’s world and we were truly just living in it.

And the fashion! I mean, Stevie Nicks meets 21st century teenage witches! Come on!

Freakshow: Dandy Mott, Maggie Esmerelda and Elsa Mars

-olive green satin skirt from morganogle on Depop, headscarf from tonijordan, platform sandals from elliefewt, PVC skirt from bethpin_, corset top from sadieflinter, beret from house_of_erotique, flame detail platform boots from mad_rags_vintage-

When people talk about the declining quality of AHS, they usually point to Freakshow as the beginning of the end, but I have to completely disagree. I wasn’t a fan the first time round but on rewatch it’s probably the most emotional season of them all; no, there aren’t as many “horrifying” moments as in other seasons and Elsa is probably Jessica’s worst performance (which is still an incredible one by anybody else’s standards), however it makes up for it with the most sympathetic bunch of characters yet, and on the flip side, also one of the most amusingly depraved with Finn Wittrock’s Dandy Mott. Fans usually argue that the season went downhill once *SPOILER* Twisty the Clown was killed off but for me, he really primarily served as the catalyst for the far more interesting devolution of Dandy, who, imo, is the show’s strongest villain to date, rivalled only by Bloody Face. Then there was the episode Orphans too which made me cry buckets, the sole AHS episode to do so.

We got a lot of great fashion content in this season too: the theatrical opulence of Elsa Mars’ wardrobe, “Maggie”’s nomadic fortune teller costumes, and all those twee suits we saw Finn Wittrock in. Highly underrated if you ask me. It seems an odd choice for me to use Elsa’s Dominatrix look as an inspiration for one of my looks here when we have that Life on Mars performance outfit and all the extravagant robes Jessica got to waltz around in for reference buuuut I didn’t really have anything to do the vibrancy of either of those justice so I went with the black leather option which is much more me. Am I saying I moonlight as a dominatrix? Maybe. Lol, no. I wish. It’s not for lack of trying. WHERE ARE ALL THE GENUINE TWITTER PAYPIGS AT!? Your girl wants to insult creepy men and get some new clothes out of it xoxo

Hotel: Hypodermic Sally, Liz Taylor, and The Countess

-silk white bralet from xlibby_maix on Depop-

Hotel is another season that I liked a lottttt more upon rewatch, once I knew I was okay to tune out the (completely predictable and utterly nonsensical) Ten Commandments Killer storyline that so much of the season initially seems to hinge on. I love Chloë Sevigny but the fact that her and Wes Bentley’s wooden John and Alex Lowe are positioned as the protagonists at the expense of the far more interesting Liz Taylor, James March and Hypodermic Sally really does a disservice to what is an otherwise great season upon initial viewing.

The visuals this season are magnificent and I think if I had to pick one character’s wardrobe to steal from the entire cast of AHS characters, it would be The Countess (a toss up between her and Misty Day tbh, so I kinda just settle for low-key channelling both). No fucking idea where I'd wear any of her clothes to but I’d make it work. Liz Taylor and Hypodermic Sally have some amazing looks too-there’s just honestly so much to choose from; that being said, this post wouldn’t be complete without a specific ode to the vampire goddess Elizabeth Bathory, who is everything I want to be in life minus the murderous qualities:

Everything. EVER-Y-THING. LOOK AT HER!

Lady Gaga is really a fucking goddess isn’t she. And people were claiming before they’d even seen it that she couldn’t act? A patriarchal society doesn’t like women that can do it all. Just saying.

Anyways!

That’s it for now! I hope you enjoyed the post if you did read til the end! Sorry I couldn’t get this out before Halloween, I was typing and Picmonkey-ing madly from 2 in the afternoon on the 31st but I taking fucking forever to get ready and had to abandon all hope of getting it out on the day by 4PM. I’ve got so much content planned and it sucks because a couple of them are lookbooks which now feel completely redundant given we’re heading into a second lockdown, but maybe I should just do it anyway? The grunge inspired moodboard I just did seemed to get a good reception too so I’ve got some more of them planned.

As always, hope everyone is keeping well, and feel free to inbox me with any suggestions, queries or even just to say hi if you need someone to talk to! I check here quite a lot so I should see it. Lots of love to everyone in this time!

Lauren x

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historyofshipping · 4 years

Text

My massive Bellarke is epic and here’s proof from s5-7 rant.

Ok guys I cannot stress enough that I am drunk, this is long, it has strong language, and it’s a trip. I am putting it almost all under a cut because it is 20 f*ing pages on word.

For reference: this was on a discord chat and I am removing all names and a few other things but there will be absolutely no editing. Anything in straight text is me, anything in italics is someone else (there’s several different someone elses so people are separated by line breaks). On my page I think it appears as everything grey is someone else, everything black is me. I’m going to put the beginning on here and rest under the cut. If you’re still going through with this, I suggest some popcorn.

Guys... I'm trying to stay optimistic but I'm really worried that jroth is gonna make bellarke canon in a really disappointing way. Like for me infidelity is a huge no in ships and I hate that becho has gone on so long that there doesn't seem to be a lot of room left in the canon timeline for a becho breakup/end that doesn't ruin the start of Bellarke for me

WAIT I GOT YOU I CAN CALM YOU I THINK BUT FIRST I NEED TO EAT MY BREADSTICKS

Every moment Echo is on the screen I want to claw my eyes out because she's so boring please jroth let it fucking end, but the feminist in me doesn't want her to die or be disrespected just because she's a callous asshole who doesn't deserve him yknow

Eat your breadsticks babe I've been living with my dread for 2 seasons I can hang on a little longer I just wish the entire becho relationship had never happened it's a blight and it's gone on so long adenfkidsngksdgnksdgn

Kate will say it better than I will, but don't lose hope! Becho hasn't really been together on screen for very long. It's only been like a few weeks to a month since the beginning of S5. They've stretched it out over two seasons, but in canon not much time has passed. And most of that time had Bellamy either sacrificing almost 300 lives to save Clarke, poisoning his sister to save Clarke, or fucking off into the wilderness with Josephine to save Clarke. They've just straight up not had enough time for Bellamy to be like, "Hey Echo, I know I said things wouldn't change but that was before my wife was actually alive, so bye." Though to wishing Becho had just never happened. We got one good angst scene with Clarke seeing them kiss. But otherwise, I could have very much done without their whole relationship.

they gave me 2 dozen breadsticks. i ordered 6

You've been blessed by the breadstick goddess.

oh sorry i was misinformed. i only have 22. apparently one bag only had 4 OK SO BELLARKE BITCHES AM I GOING TO ANNOYINGLY DO THIS IN CAPS SO BUCKLE TF UP

I mean, I love the idea that they only got together in the sixth year on the ring when Bellamy totally lost hope but is that canon? I thought we had a 3 year range

ALL RIGHT

We ignore canon in this channel. lol They've been together for 3 months.

SO LET'S START AT THE BEGINNING OF BECHO ok caps off. i even annoyed myself

I'm so here for this.

https://tenor.com/view/murder-she-wrote-angela-lansbury-jessica-eats-popcorn-interested-gif-4594942

Damn, I was ready for caps.

OK WE'RE BACK TO CAPS

https://giphy.com/gifs/popcorn-go-on-keep-going-Zd1BUb0qs6nwjeMUBu

OK SO WE HAVE BECHO'S FIRST SCENE TOGETHER ANYONE REMEMBER WHAT BELLAMY SAID? ANYONE? THIS REQUIRES AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION

"Hey work with me so I can break everyone out of this mountain"? or something?

OH DAMN I MEANT WHEN THEY WERE CANONICALLY TOGETHER XP

"I'm a goddamn delight who's trying to save your life you ungrateful walnut so maybe don't spit in my face" is what I would have written

LMFAO OJN THE RING WHAT'S THE FIRST THING WE HEAR FROM THEM? THE FIRST IMPORTANT THING? ANYONE?

Unfortunately that scene was physically repulsive for me so I don't remember much except for "nothing will change on the ground and my sister totally didn't mean to murder you"

AHA! THERE YA GO NOTHING WILL CHANGE ON TEH GROUND BECAUSE WHAT IS HE EXPECTING ON THE GROUND? NOTHING TO CHANGE BECAUSE THE ONLY THING THAT COULD CHANGE IS -----

>"I'm a goddamn delight who's trying to save your life you ungrateful walnut so maybe don't spit in my face" is what I would have written I SPIT OUT MY DRINK I CANNOT

ANYONE? YUP

I'm behind. lol

CLARKE

AND THEN WE GOT TO THE GROUND, WHAT HAPPENED?

BEING ALIVE

His sister having more taste in his romantic partners than him?

WHAT WAS THE LITERAL ONE THING THAT COULD HAPPEN THAT WOULD CHANGE BELLAMY'S MIND DING DING DING CLARKE IS ALIVE

10 points to

AND WHAT DOES OUR BABY BOY DO?

SACRIFICE 300 PEEPS FOR HIS WIFE

Clarke with a gun AND a kid AND a rover AND bedtime storytelling practice like what more could he want that's all the things he loves

A LITTLE AHEAD BUT BANG

BABY BOY FOLLOWS CLARKS DAUGHTER FIRST, LEAVING ECHO IN THE LITERAL DUST (that's what he does before sacrificing lives)

WE WENT FROM "I WILL NOT TOUCH THESE PEOPLE BECAUSE WE'RE GOING TO DO BETTER." TO "I WILL SLAUGHTER 283 PEOPLE WITHOUT RAISING AN EYEBROW" BECAUSE RANDOM CHILD SHOWS UP AND SAYS "CLARKE'S IN TROUBLE" RANDOM CHILD WHO HAS JUST KILLED A BUNCH OF HARDENED CRIMINALS

He had the dad mug tho, he had to help her

HE SAW HIMSELF IN HER HE KNEW

HIS SOUL KNEW

SO WE'RE THERE NOW BUT THEN BANG, WE'RE ON THE GROUND AND OH FUCK I FORGOT I HAD A GIRLFRIEND BUT BELLAMY IS LOYAL SO HE SURE AF ISN'T DOING ANYTHING UNTIL HE'S DONE WITH ECHO BUT

He's had 2 seasons!!!!!

CLARKE BASICALLY ACTS LIKE SHE DIDN'T CARE ABOUT THE SEPARATION THOU SHALT NOT POKE HOLES IN MY SHIT UNTIL I AM DONE

>He's had 2 seasons!!!!! But only like a few weeks in time.

BECAUSE THESE TWO FUCK HEADS CANNOT HAVE A CONVERSATION

Forgive me!

SO WE HAVE A GRAND TOTAL OF FEWER THAN 3 WEEKS THAT THEY'RE ON THE GROUND AND THEN IN THAT TIME WE HAD.... one sec pPLEASE TAKE A MOMENT TO REVIEW THE TIMELINE https://historyofbellarke.tumblr.com/post/620425806742749184/season-5-7x03-so-far-timeline FOR SEASON 5 ALL RIGHT SO WE HAVE THEM TOGETHER FOR LESS THAN A WEEK BEFORE BELLAMY'S LIKE (FROM CLARKE'S PERSPECTIVE) "I DON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOUR KID, I HAVE TO SAVE MY FAMILY" SO THEN WE HAVE THEM SPEND THE NEXT 10 DAYS APART BECAUSE SHE LEFT HIM AFTER SLAPPING HIM AND SHE THOUGHT HE DIED BECAUSE THEY ARE FUCKING MORONS WHO CAN'T HAVE A CONVERSATION (YOU WILL NOTICE A RECURRING THEME) AND THEN, ECHO HAS LEARNED THAT NOT ONLY HAS CLARKE CARED ABOUT BELLAMY ALL THIS TIME BUT THAT SHE'S ONCE AGAIN READY TO PUT THE FATE OF HUAMNITIY ON THE LINE TO SAVE HIM "GO SAVE HIM. EVEN TAKE MURDER!DAUGHTER WITH YOU" BUT BELLAMY STILL DOESN'T KNOW THIS SO ANYWAY WE HAVE ANGST!BELLAMY GET PARENT TRAPPED BY MURDER!DAUGHTER are y'all still with me? AND THEN WHAT HAPPENED IMMEDIATELY AFTER MURDER!DAUGHTER'S INTERVENTION?

BELLARKE FORGIVENESS ™

YAS NOT ONLY THAT BUT SOFT!BELLARKE RETURNS WITH A VENGEANCE [side note: you can pry this theory from my cold dead hands but there was 100% a canon bellarke scene between forgiveness and 125 year wake up just in case they ended at season 5.]

[I need them to publish that scene when this is all over]

ALL RIGHT SO FUCKING MARPER - WHO SPENT A TOTAL OF LIKE 4 MONTHS WITH CLARKE BUT 6 YEARS WITH THEIR FAMILY- DECIDED TO WAKE UP BELLARKE TO TALK TO AND GIVE GUARDIANSHIP TO AND WHY DID THEY DO THAT?

THEY BEEN KNEW

I'LL ACCEPT IT

OK SO WE GET THIS PROMISING FUTURE TOGETHER ON THIS NEW PLANET RIGHT?

WRONG MURDER POLLEN

OK BUT TECHNICALLY BECHO IS STILL TOGETHER. NO PROBLEM - WE NEED TO FIGURE OUR SHIT OUT AND THEN WE'LL HAVE PLENTY OF TIME TO HAVE PEACE AND GET TOGETHER OK SO I'M JUST GOING TO START SAYING "CHORUS" WHEN I MEAN "BECAUSE THESE TWO DUMBASSES CAN'T TALK TO EACH OTHER" IS CHORUS THE RIGHT WORD? OR IS IT REFRAIN? WHATEVER ONE REPEATS - THAT ONE ALL RIGHT SO WE HAVE THEM GOING INTO THE VILLAGE AND EVERY TIME THERE IS DANGER, BELLAMY GOES IMMEDIATELY TO CLARKE WHEN IT'S PEACEFUL, OPE IT'S BACK TO ECHO

(like the husband he is)

I HAVE A WHOLE META ABOUT THAT IF YOU WANT IT BUT SO THEN THE FIRST TIME - LITERALLY THE FIRST TIME SINCE THE MARPER VIDEO - THAT THEY'RE ALONE, IT'S BECAUSE BELLAMY HAS SOUGHT HER OUT AND WHY DID BELLAMY SEEK HER OUT? Y'ALL I'M ONLY AT 6X01. I HAVE SO MUCH AMMUNITION BUT SOMEONE IS WELCOME TO SCREEN SHOT THIS SO THAT THE NEXT TIEM WE HAVE DOUBTS, I DON'T HAVE TO TYPE IT ALL OUT SO WHY DID BELLAMY SEEK HER OUT?

>Y'ALL I'M ONLY AT 6X01. I HAVE SO MUCH AMMUNITION @kate (historyofbellarke) "Give a position show me where the ammunition is" from My Shot just popped into my head lololol

WHY DID BELLAMY LEAVE HIS CANONICAL GIRLFRIEND TO GO SEEK OUT CLARKE?

BECAUSE HE LOVES HER AND ALSO BECAUSE THERE WAS DANGER

OK BUT WHY SPECIFICALLY NOOO WHEN CLARKE WAS IN THE SCHOOL

AND THE LAST TIME SHE WASN'T IN HIS SIGHT SHE ALMOST DIED

OK THAT TOO

Okay I'm lost at this point then.

LOL

Phone a friend.

Bc she sucks and Clarke's the best?

I'LL LET ---- CHIME IN LMFAO I LOVE YOU GUYS KNOW IT'S TO TELL HER THAT HE KNOWS ABOUT THE CALLS

OH THAT SCENE

HE KNOWS THAT SHE CALLED HIM EVERY DAY FOR 2,199 DAYS HE SOUGHT HER OUT, BY HERSELF, TO TELL HER THIS

YES YES

BUT BECAUSE CHORUS

WE'RE BACK THESE FUCK HEADS CAN'T HAVE A CONVERSATION

SHE GOT NERVOUS AND DUCKED OUT BECAUSE IT'S BEEN LESS THAN 3 WEEKS SINCE HE CAME BACK AND SHE'S OVERWHELMED BECAUSE HOLY FUCK WHAT A 3 WEEK PERIOD THAT WAS (REFER BACK TO TIMELINE AS NEEDED) ALL RIGHTY SO THEN AFTER THAT THEY FIND OUT ABOUT THE RED SUN WHICH BY THE WAY IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE THINGS BECAUSE HE CALLS OVER ECHO JUST TO PROMPTLY IGNORE HER COMPLETELY [AND BECAUSE IT'S ME, I HAVE A GIFSET FOR THAT] SORRY I GOT DISTRACTED

NO WE'RE HERE FOR THE GIFSET

I'M LOOKING OK IT'S PART OF THIS SO YOU GET A 2 FOR 1 https://historyofbellarke.tumblr.com/post/184827185143/bellarke-danger-vs-becho-safety OK NOW I FORGOT WERE I LEFT OFF OH YEAH IGNORING ECHO ALL RIGHT SO THEN WE HAVE EVERYTHING GO TO SHIT AND OF COURSE, BELLARKE LOCK THEMSELVES TOGETHER AND WE HAVE THE ANGST THE ANGST BUT THEY HAVE EACH OTHER'S KEYS

WHICH IS A MARRIED MOVE IF I EVER HEARD ONE

BECAUSE THEY HAVE THE KEY TO MY HEART, WHEREVER YOU ARE, I'LL KEEP YOU

That's a very comprehensive gifset

IF YOU DON'T KNOW THAT SONG THEN I FEEL OLD SO YOU HAVE THEM UNLOCKING EACH OTHER BECAUSE OF COURSE THEY ARE

I might drift in and out of conversation, partner wants attention but I wanna finish reading this asdfgh

AND HE'S LIKE "NAH ECHO, WIFEY AND I GOT THIS. WE GOTTA TAKE CARE OF OUR KIDS." TELL THEM TO WAIT THEIR TURN SO THEY'RE GOING LITERALLY PSYCHOTIC BUT THAT'S COOL. I TRUST THE OTHER ONE ENOUGH TO NOT KILL ME BUT OH WAIT - WHAT IS BELLAMY'S PSYCHOSIS ?

Not needing Clarke anymore...?

YUP WHICH MEAN S

He needed her and knew it at some point

YUP ALSO I FOUND THAT GIFSET THAT I IDD TO THAT SONG https://historyofbellarke.tumblr.com/post/184725894498/this-song-popped-into-my-head-and-i-had-to OK SO SKIPPING AHEAD, HIS BIGGEST SECRET IS THAT HE DOES STILL NEED HER OK EVEN I'M STARTED TO GET BORED SO I'LL GIVE BULLET POINTS FROM HERE ON OUT SO WE HAVE HIM NEEDING HER HIM CALLING HER THE LEADER EVEN THOUGH SHE HASN'T BEEN FOR LIKE 6 YEARS AND WE HAVE HIM PINING OVER HER AT THE DANCE FLOOR AND PICKING A FIGHT WITH ECHO OH YEAH AND WE SEE ALL THE BECHO CRACKS HERE

This has been a v good rundown, I won't lie.

LOL

ONWARD I'M BACK ON TRACK

WE HAVE JUXTAPOSED: ECHO NOT KNOWING WHAT TO SAY WITH REGARDS TO OBUT CLARKE KNOWING EXACTLY WHAT TO SAY EVEN AFTER 6 YEARS

BECAUSE WIFEY

https://historyofbellarke.tumblr.com/post/618426948212965376/historyofbellarke-4-times-someone-knew-the-right

Really you'd think the spy would know what someone wants to hear smh

NAH BECAUSE SHE HAS NO EMOTIONAL EMPATHY. WE'LL GET TO THAT EVENTUALLY

She's also kinda a shit spy. Like when has she ever done actual spying.

Y'ALL I HAVE A GIF FOR EVERYTHING. I'M THE LIZ WARREN OF BELLARKE GIFS GIFSETS AT LEAST

You don't need empathy to fake it, Madison's right she's just such a bad spy :joy:

I'VE GOT NOTHING ON ---- FOR JUST GIFS LOLi

I say this as someone who was 10/10 a spy in a past life at least according to my recurring dreams about it1

OK SO THEN WE ALSO HAVE BELLAMY SIDING WITH CLARKE AT EVERY TURN, OVER ECHO'S EXPLICIT OBJECTIONS AND WE HAVE HER NOTICINGGGGGG WE'RE HERE FOR THIS CONTENT

https://historyofbellarke.tumblr.com/post/185265380768/6x04-bec-scene-follow-up-with-6x05 JUST ONE EXAMPLE

HATE TO SEE IT

SO WE HAVE BELLAMY CLEARLY SHOWING THAT HE'S HER LEADER - WHETHER HE MEANS TO BE OR NOT - WHICH COMES IN IN 7X01

Total aside but now I want a modern au where Bellamy doesn't know how to break up with Echo so he tries to ghost her while everyone around him is pulling their hair out

OH SHIT ONE SECOND I HAVE TO DO DUOLINGO SO I DON'T LOSE MY STREAK BRB

>Total aside but now I want a modern au where Bellamy doesn't know how to break up with Echo so he tries to ghost her while everyone around him is pulling their hair out ---- I love this, actually. WE SHALL HOLD YOUR SPOT

No one in this goddamn canon knows how to have an actual breakup conversation they only know how to die

CORRECT CHORUS

BECAUSE THESE TWO DUMBASSES CAN'T TALK TO EACH OTHER

Ironically Raven and Finn are the only ones who have had a half-normal breakup.

Will be back, partner is dramatically exclaiming that I don't love him anymore bc I won't go give him a goddamn hug bc the meta's too good

BOOM OK I'M BACK

SIDE NOTE BEFORE WE'RE BACK

GO ON

What language are you learning on Duolingo?

relearning spanish and then german german for work, spanish because i used to be fluent and i'm so bad now xp

This entire convo is a chaotic mess

We are a chaotic mess.

WELCOME TO THE HELLMOUTH, ----

Our ship is a chaotic mess.

It all tracks, honestly.

WE WOULD'VE ALL BEEN SO MUCH BETTER OFF IF JASPER HAD DESTROYED THE CHIP OOK SO MOVING ON NOW I FORGOT WHERE I LEFT OFF OH YEAH LEADER PERF SO OH YEAH I FORGOT TO ADD - 6 & 7 ARE ONE SINGULAR SEASON SO

This convo should totally be convered into a Masterclass session at the end. YES

WE'VE GOT A RUNNING THREAD OF ECHO BEING A FOLLOWER OF BELLAMY AND HER KNOWING IT

6/7 ARE ONE SEASON WE'RE HERE WE'RE LIVING

BUT BACK TO S6 SO WE HAVE BELLAMY BEING THE FIRST TO REALIZE THAT CLARKE WANS'T CLARKE AND WE HAVE THIS BEAUTIFUL MOMENT

I’m here and all of this is glorious

OH YEAH THERE'S ALSO THIS BUT I DIGRESS https://historyofbellarke.tumblr.com/post/618548726524510208/historyofbellarke-5x09-6x04-6x05 THE FIRST ONE HERE - https://historyofbellarke.tumblr.com/post/616075629201408000/just-some-clips-ofabout-bellamy-where-either HE'S WILLING TO RISK EVERYTHING EBCAUSE CLARKE MIGHT BE AT RISK EVEN THOUGH THEY LITERALLY HAVE NO WHERE ELSE TO GO OH YEAH FUCKING MURPHY - I'LL GET BACK TO HIM ALL RIGHT SO THEN WE HAVE BELLAMY FIGURING IT OUT AND THE HORROR BLOOMING IN HIS SOUL AND THEN WE HAVE HIM LITERALLY WITH A ROOM DESTROYED EVERN THOUGH HE IS CHAINED UP LIKE SERIOUSLY HOW DID HE MANAGE THAT AND THEN TRY TO KILL RUSSELL THE SECOND HE COULD BECAUSE HE HURT CLARKE EVEN THOUGH, AGAIN, THAT'S THE ONLY WAY HE AND HIS PEOPLE COULD SURIVVE BUT WITHOUT CLARKE, HE'S NOT ALIVE. HE ONLY SURVIVES AND HOW DO WE KNOW THIS? BECAUSE HE FUCKING SAYS IT (implicitly)

I just came into this. I have nothing to add I just want to say I’m living for it

:heart:

Agreed, this conversation is giving meaning to my insomnia :joy:

https://historyofbellarke.tumblr.com/post/618973621000585216/just-a-reminder-that-bellamy-canonically-only

WHOLE F*ING THING ON SURVIVING VS LIVING AND THEN ONCE HE DECIDES THEY'RE GOING TO LIVE (AND LET RUSSELL LIVE) BECAUSE IT'S WHAT CLARKE WOULD'VE WANTED, HE SAYS "WE SURVIVE" LOOKING LIKE THE SADDEST FUCKING PUPPY IN EXISTENCE AND DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THE FACT THAT WE HAD A WHOLE DAMN EPISODE OF A 13 EPISODE SEASON DEVOTED TO BELLAMY SUFFERING BECAUSE HIS WIFE DIED AGAIN 3 WEEKS AFTER SHE WAS RESURRECTED SUBTLE, JASON. SUBTLE. OK NOW BACK TO MY BELOVED COCKROACH MURPHY AND BELLAMY ARE ARGUABLY THE TWO CLOSEST NON-ROMANTIC (:upside_down:) PEOPLE ON THE SHIP THE RING RIGHT? OK WE'RE GOING WITH IT ANYWAY

Hmmm yes(I agreee) but also Clarke and Murphy have that understanding that transcends words?

THEY ARE THE CLOSEST ROMANCE WITHSTANDING ON THE SHIP

AND MURPHY, MY BELOVED MURPHY, HAS BEEN THERE FROM "I'LL CHOP HER HAND OFF" TO "OH FUCK OH FUCK OH FUCK CLARKE IS UNCONSCIOUS AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO" TO "YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY ONE HERE SAVING SOMEONE THEY CARE ABOUT"

BECAUSE BELLAMY DOES NOT EVEN KNOW ECHO'S ACTUAL NAME AND THEREFORE THEY ARE NOT CLOSE

LOL SO MURPHY AFTER 6 YEARS IS TRYING TO GET BELLAMY TO DO SOMETHING HE WANTS (WE'RE BACK IN SEASON 5 NOW, SORRY) AND HOW DOES HE DO THAT?

AND INVOLKES MOM'S NAME

BLESSED BE "WELL IF CLARKE WAS HERE" BELLAMY ESPLODES OK SO NOW WE HAVE MURPHY AGAIN WHO KNOWSSSS AND WHAT DOES HE SAY TO JOSIE? ABOUT BELLAMY

If Clarke is dead Bellamy will kill us all HE KNOWS

BAM ALSO, REFER BACK TO PREVIOUS GIFSET, SAME MURPHY "OH YEAH I'LL TRY TO HELP ECHO TOO" BECAUSE MURPHY KNOWSSSS OOK THAT'S ALL FOR MURPHY NOW SO WE HAVE BELLAMY "WE'RE GOING TO SURVIVE BECAUSE I CAN'T LIVE WITHJOUT CLARKE BUT I'M GOING TO ONCE AGAIN HONOR HER FUCKING MEMORY" UNTILLLLLL WHAT HAPPENS

lol @ Murphy having to remind Bell his gf exists hahahah UNTIL HIS SOUL REALIZES CLARKE IS ALIVE

BUT HOW DOES HE REALIZE THAT

BECAUSE YOU CAN'T CONVINCE ME HE KNEW IT WAS MORSE CODE BECAUSE OF EARTH SKILLS NO

HE KNEW IT WAS MORSE CODE BECAUSE HIS SOUL FUCKING KNEW HIS WIFE WAS ALIVE

Yesss

PLATONIC SOULMATE MY ASS JASON

Morse code is life

[okay rant over, continue Kate]

MILLER'S FACE WAS LIKE "YOU FUCKING WHAT MAN?"

(side note- i am getting alive in morse code on my wrist when covid clears) OK SO WE'RE BACK SO WE HAVE JOSIE TAPPING HER FINGERS

Oh I love that I have friend who has that tattoo

YES TAP TAP MILLER GOING WTF BELL GOING ALL GIDDY PUPPY WITH A BONE

WHICH MEANS BELLAMY HAD TO HAVE GONE BACK TO HIS FAMILY AND SAY "OK WE'RE GOING TO RESCUE MY DEAD WIFE. SHE'S ALIVE. IKNOW BECAUSE JOSIE WAS TAPPING HER FINGERS." AND THE FAMILY HAD TO GO "YEAH OK THAT MAKES SENSE."

AND NO ONE QUESTIONED IT BECAUSE THEY BEEN KNEW

Yessss

SO WHAT ARE THEY GOING TO DO? LIKE IT WAS EVEN A QUESTION. THEY'RE RESCUING CLARKE AND BY THEY'RE I MEAN HE BECAUSE HE DOES NOT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THEM AT THE MOMENT SO HE'S LIKE "READY OR NOT, I'M RESCUING MY WIFE. BYEEEEE" AND JORDAN'S LIKE "WHAT ABOUT PRIYA?" AND EVERYONE'S LIKE ".... SORRY BRO. CLARKE. YOU WANTED HEART BELLAMY. YOU GOT HIM." SO HE GOES, LEAVING HIS FAMILY BEHIND WITH A BUNCH OF PSYCHOPATHIC MURDERERS WHO KNOW THAT BELLAMY IS GOING TO KILL THEIR DAUGHTER BUT HE'S JUST LIKE... BYE AND HE KNOWS, AND WE KNOW THAT HE KNOWS, BECAUSE JOSIE TAUNTS HIM ABOUT IT THE WHOLE TIME BECAUSE JOSIE IS THE AUDIENCE BASICALLY

JOSIE IS US BUT SLIGHTLY MORE PSYCHOTIC

ALL RIGHT SO SKIPPING AHEAD, SKIPPING AHEAD, YOU HAVE JOSIE'S WHOLE RUN DOWN OF THEIR RELATIONSHIP

TOGETHER

AND HIS VERY LONG PAUSE FOLLOWED BY "I WON'T LET YOU DIE"

EXHAUSTING

INSTEAD OF I FUCKING LOVE YOU BECAUSE CHORUS SO WE GET CLARKE BACK THROUGH SHEER FORCE OF BELLAMY'S WILL

>AND HIS VERY LONG PAUSE FOLLOWED BY "I WON'T LET YOU DIE" @kate (historyofbellarke) "I LOVE YOU, BITCH. I AIN'T EVER GONNA STOP LOVING YOU, BITCH."

"I'LL SHAVE THE BEARD" SO WE HAVE CLARKE WHO GAVE UP LIVING BECAUSE SHE THOUGHT BELLAMY GAVE UP (REMEMBER, JOSIE SHOWING HER THE MEMORY OF BELLAMY SAYING WE'LL TAKE THE DEAL) AND THEN CLARKE COMING BACK TO LIFE BECAUSE BELLAMY WOULDN'T GIVE UP AND THEN WE HAVE OCTAVIA, MY BROTHER POISONED ME FOR HIS WIFE AND I STILL RAISED MY NIECE ON STORIES OF EPIC BELLARKE, BLAKE IN THE BACKGROUND BEING ALL OF US

>SO WE HAVE CLARKE WHO GAVE UP LIVING BECAUSE SHE THOUGHT BELLAMY GAVE UP (REMEMBER, JOSIE SHOWING HER THE MEMORY OF BELLAMY SAYING WE'LL TAKE THE DEAL) @kate (historyofbellarke) OMG I HAVE A SPEC ABOUT THIS I HAVE A SPEC ABOUT THIS BUT IMMA WAIT TIL WE'RE DONE TO POP INTO SPEC TO TALK IT OUT OKAY CONTINUE

i'm going to keep going, but have i done a pretty good job of convincing anyone who was wavering? because remember this is all canon. i have done absolutely no spec-ing at all.

I'm very hype rn. Ngl.

lol

Could flip a tire for Bellarke rn kind of hype

OK SO NOW CLARKE IS ALIVE BUT OH FUCK, THE REST OF THE FAMILY IS IN TROUBLE WE LITERALLY HAD MURPHY, MY BLESSED MURPHY, SHOW UP TO GO "YO. YOUR GIRLFRIEND." AND BELLAMY GO https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/591463308117278720/716493560610029708/tumblr_pv4mkld49N1xsmktho1_500.gif SO OF COURSE, IT'S NOT TIME TO TALK BECAUSE CHORUS

DUMBASSES NO TALKIE

SO WE GET EVERYONE FIXED. A BUNCH OF UNNECESSARY PLOT SHIT HAPPENS. AND THEN BELLAMY LITERALLY PUSHES HIS GIRLFRIEND OUT OF THE WAY TO GO AND DO A DRAMATIC SUNSET REUNION WITH HIS WIFE AND THEN PLOT SHIT PLOT SHIT PLOT SHIT WE'RE IN S7 AM I MISSING S6 STUFF? PROBABLY BUT Y'ALL IT'S LITERALLY BEEN 4 WEEKS IN CANON AT THIS POINT AND I MISSED A LOT OF SHIT. SO Y'KNOW. OUR BABIES ARE TIRED N AND NOW WE'RE ALL GOOD RIGHT? JUST GONNA GO HAVE A QUICK MEETING WITH GABRIEL AND THEN GO BACK TO MY WIFE SO WE CAN TALK OVER SOME TEA THEN BAM, O GETS STABBED AND THEN WE HAVE . 4 EPISODES THAT HAPPEN OVER 2 DAYS BEFORE CLARKE'S LIKE "WELP. I'M THROWING MYSELF HEAD FIRST INTO A WORM HOLE TO GO GET MY HUSBAND AND HIS STUPID GIRLFRIEND." AND YOU HAVE EVERYONE ELSE GOING "I'M SORRY, DID YOU THINK ANYTHING ELSE WAS GOING TO HAPPEN?" AND FOLLOWING AND THE S6/7 WRITERS MOSTLY JUST CHOSE TO IGNORE THAT S4/5 WRITERS GAVE CLARKE A DAUGHTER BECAUSE, WELL, I DON'T BLAME THEM EVEN THOUGH I LOVE MADI SHE'S AN UNNECESSARY COMPLICATION SO HAND WAVING SHE'S FINE SO NOW WE'RE UP TO PRESENT

Fully convinced Madi was there to ensure Clarke didn't go fully insane on Earth and provide motive for that bitch slap scene from S5.

brb spilled beer

Oh, and to parent trip Bell/Clarke.

>brb spilled beer @kate (historyofbellarke) makes sense after the tea you're spilling on this channel

Someone really oughta document this convo for a later date. lol We will need to reference it before end of the season, bet. lol

blesss i do not deserve my partner he told me to go sit down and is cleaning it also i went to finish the last of the unspilled stuff and promptly spilled it down my chest so ALL RIGHT WHERE WERE WE OH YEAH AND BELLAMY FORGAVE HER BECAUSE MADI WAS LIKE "YO YOU'RE A PARENT TOO AND REMMEBER SHE STOOD BY YOU WHEN YOU PUT OCTAVIA ABOVE LITERALLY EVERYTHING" AND BELLAMY WAS LIKE "OH... SHIT." AND THEN SHE WAS LIKE "SHE CALLE DYOU EVERY DAY YOU DUMBFUCK" AND YOU HAVE THE PATENTED "OMG, DOES CLARKE HAVE FEELINGS FO RME TOO???" JAW DROP BUT NOW BACK TO PRESENT

(Now if someone will just fucking tell her that he did the equivalent grant gestureTM of the radio calls except w/ poison)

i didn't even include the fact that he fucking poisoned O, that diyoza referred to her as his girlfriend, etc etc etc OH AND AS TO WHY HBECHO ISN'T GOING TO BE A HTING ANYMORE BESIDES EVERYTHING I'VE SAID

FINN COLLINS THAT'S WHY

BASUCALLY YES

FINN COLLINS EXCEPT AT LEAST CLARKE KNEW HIS REAL NAME

THEY DID A LITERAL EXACT PARALLEL BETWEEN BELLAMY AND ECHO SPFEIHOi4ur YES LIKE IT'S LIKE THE WRITERS FOUND BESTOFBECHO AND WENT "FUCK, ARE WE NOT BEING OBVIOUS ENOUGH? TIME TO CALL IN ZACH MCGOWAN" ( THEY FUCKING GOT ZACH ON A PLANE FROM LA TO VANCOUVER TO JUST SAY "YOU DON'T LOVE HIM" LIKE I DON'T THINK PEOPLE REALIZE HOW INVOLVED OF A PROCESS IT IS TO GET AN ACTOR THERE - ESPECIALLY IN CANADA WHERE YOU HAVE TO BALANCE NON-CANADIAN WITH CANADIAN ACTORS OR YOU CAN'T SHOOT IN CANADA SO THIS AMERICAN HAD TO BE TAKEN INTO ACCOUNT FOR THE WHOLE SEASON FOR A 2 MINUTE APPERANCE BUT THE WRITERS WERE LIKE "YO HUGE NEON SIGN RIGHT HERE" AND THEN SHE CONTINUED ALL SEASON IN THAT VEIN UNTIL 7X05 WHEN SHE BROKEEEEE OVER HIS "DEATH"

BECAUSE HER SOUL DIDN'T KNOW HE WAS ALIVE LIKE BELL DID CLARKE

AND DID THE EXACT SAME FUCKING THING BELLAMY DID WHEN HE FOUND OUT CLARKE WAS ALIVE

And also as mentioned, she's a shit spy.

BECAUSE THE WRITERS ARE LIKE "CAN WE MAKE IT MORE OBVIOUS? I'M NOT SURE HOW!" so now we're at present day and here's a bit of crack spec-ing

THANKS FOR THIS LONG ASS META !!

YOU ARE WELCOME once again if i put that amount of effort into my dissertation, i'd be a phd with a published book or 3

This was a joy to read An utter joy This reaffirmed all my beliefs and got rid of all doubts I had

https://tenor.com/view/about-to-ugly-cry-ugly-cry-emotional-sensitive-crying-gif-8033343 i aim to please so now we have that O/B scene so we as the audience know something is off. bellamy was dragged sobbing and unconscious by his captors to suddenly being awake, fine, and killing a bunch of trained soldiers and holding someone hostage with his left hand. so then you have O, noticing something isn't quite right, casually bringing up clarke's name clarke. fucking. griffin. who bellamy had JUST brought back from the dead after learning she was alive and he's just... calm? about O possibly doing something with these psychos that's related to clarke? HE JUST POISONED HIS SISTER LIKE A WEEK AGO TO SAVE CLARKE'S LIFE i cannot stress this enough. bellamy fucking blake would not just go "huh?" when O, his sister that he's barely tolerating, goes "i'll tell you, you psychotic cultists, everything about my sister-in-law" and that's it. that's where i'm at s6 was about bellamy literally pulling clarke back from death s7 will be about clarke literally crossing time and space to get back to bellamy THIS IS AN EPIC FUCKING LOVE STORY AND ANYONE WHO THINKS OTHERWISE IS WRONG AND NOW I'M GOING TO TAKEA . SHOWER BECAUSE I SPILLED BEER ON MYSELF BUT I WILL BE BACK also i didn't think iw as drunk but then i reread that and started crying so it's definitely shower time

#bellarke #bellarke meta #the 100 #anti bech #anti ech #blarke wine club #long post

156 notes · View notes

thegirlwhorunswithwinchesters · 4 years

Text

Request: “#42 with Dean + Pregnant!Reader” by @flamencodiva

Prompt: "Time for plan B." - "We didn't even have a plan A."

Pairing: Dean x Pregnant!Reader

Word count: 1.9K

Warnings: Dean and Sam are both in need of the infamous ‘breathe slowly and count to ten’-method, a tiny bit of angst if you squint

A/N: Thank you for your patience. Hope you enjoy the read! <3

Beta: @slytherkins

JJ’s Rockin’ 100 - PROMPTS || MASTERLIST || ASK BOX

(gif)

You woke up in one of the comfortable red armchairs in the bunker’s library. There was an open hardcover copy of ‘A Guide to Growing a Happy Sprout’ spread out over top your round stomach. You remembered sitting down earlier with the intention of reading a few pages. How much time had passed since then, you did not know. As your pregnancy progressed, you kept finding yourself taking accidental naps more and more.

You stretched but immediately winced at how uncomfortable it made you. Getting up to put the book away, you took a quick glance at the room and found it to be empty. You were pretty sure Sam and Dean were around somewhere, even though you thought it possible you had just slept for literal decades, judging by the heavy drowsiness still fogging your brain. In which case, both Winchesters would be long gone and the world outside the bunker had probably ended.

On the off-chance that wasn’t true, you decided to have a look around and see where the boys were. You shuffled forward on sock-covered feet, but you had barely made your way out of the library when a loud bang sounded from the hallway, followed by a string of curse words.

Your hands reached for your belly, covering it instinctively as if to shield your unborn child’s ears from the profanities that carried toward you down the hallway. You recognized the voice as Dean’s, all sleepiness gone in an instant at the possibility of him being in trouble.

When you reached the door of the room you shared with Dean, you paused. Sam’s voice mixed with Dean’s but you realized they were coming from next door.

The room next to your bedroom had been empty before you and your husband decided to turn it into a nursery. Nothing much had happened inside so far. All you did was clear out the old Men of Letters’ furniture and paint the walls a soft blue color you picked out after hours of deliberation. Stretched out wide over one of the walls was a colorful rainbow, which you had painted as well, back when you were still able to see your own feet.

You walked over to the closed door and made a mental note to replace the numbers on it with a cute little sign once you and Dean had decided on a name for the baby. Your hand rested on the door handle and you were about to enter, when Dean’s voice sounded again.

“Time for plan B.” His voice was more gruff than usual, indicating he was not in a good mood.

“We didn’t even have a plan A.” Sam’s response came quick. He sounded as annoyed with his older brother as ever.

“Shut up, Sammy. You agreed to help me with this.”

“And I will, once you learn how to read.”

“Alright, that’s it. You listen to me…” Dean started, his volume increasing. You decided this would be as good a moment as any to step in and see what was going on.

The moment the door opened, Sam and Dean went quiet and looked up at you. Both men were sitting on the floor opposite each other. Their long legs were spread out in front of them and they were surrounded by pieces of wood, nails, and assorted tools. You even saw a dangerously sharp looking saw propped up against the wall. Next to them stood a contraption that looked familiar but you couldn’t quite place. It wasn’t until you saw the empty box in the corner of the room and the images it had printed on the side, that you realized what the franken-creation next to Sam and Dean was supposed to be.

“I…” You tried to think of something nice to say. Maybe it would diffuse the tense atmosphere in the room. But you couldn’t think of anything and you didn’t want to lie, so you concluded with, “…have no words.”

Dean reached out to smack Sam’s shoulder. “I told you!” he hissed. “We did it wrong.”

Sam rolled his eyes so hard you half expected them to pop out and land at your feet. “Of course, we did it wrong, Dean. My unborn niece or nephew can probably see we did it wrong. Does that look like a crib to you?” He pointed an accusing finger at their unfortunate end result.

You had ordered a cradle online a few days ago. It was a perfect match with the rest you had planned for the nursery. However, at the moment it didn’t exactly look like a baby would be able to sleep in it.

Sam looked up at you now. He saw the troubled look in your eyes and quickly got up to put a hand on your shoulder reassuringly. “It’s okay, Y/N,” he said softly. “We’ll fix it.” Then his voice changed again. “It’s just been a challenge so far because someone doesn’t know how to properly read an instruction manual.” His gaze found his brother’s and the two men stared each other down for an unnerving moment.

“Oh, yeah?” Dean’s voice finally boomed. “Yeah, well… Neither can you!”

It’s a good thing you didn’t marry the man for his comebacks.

You put up both your hands, palms forward as if to surrender yourself. “Okay, if we could all just take a breather here,” you suggested with a hopeful tone in your voice.

Dean didn’t move, but Sam complied. His chest heaved as he breathed in through his nose. Then he turned his attention back to you. “All I’m saying is, when I offered to help with this, I thought Dean would at least have a plan of attack, but he didn’t. Instead he literally attacked and went at it like a freaking animal.” Sam shook his head. “Now we’re gonna have to start this whole thing over from scratch.”

Dean tried to look angry at first. He clearly didn’t like being called out like this, and struggling with the different parts of the crib for as long as they had, Dean had clearly become grumpy. Then it seemed Sam’s last words finally started to dawn on him and his expression changed to one of pure terror.

“No way,” he said almost breathlessly. "I am not starting over. Nuh-uh, not happening.”

You took a step forward and put your hand against Dean’s cheek. It had the intended effect; he visibly relaxed and his eyes softened as he looked up at you. Your thumb gently stroked his stubbled skin.

“Why don’t you guys take a break,” you suggested, fearing your husband’s sanity if he didn’t step away from this for a moment. “I, for one, am starving. You’re not gonna let me eat dinner all by myself, are you?”

To your surprise, Dean’s perfect lips pulled into a smile. Behind you, Sam opened the door a little further and stepped into the hallway.

“I’ll head out to get some grub,” he offered. “A new place opened downtown, they’re supposed to have the best burgers.”

Your mouth started to water at the mere thought of the junk food Sam was about to get for you. Of course he knew what to suggest to make you happy. You had practically been breathing cheeseburgers. At first your cravings had been all over the place, but these past few weeks it had gotten stuck on anything fat and greasy. The other day, you had finished your burger before Dean had even started his, a miraculous turn of events, if you said so yourself.

Sam walked ahead, already on his way to the garage. It left you alone with Dean and when the older Winchester went to pass you, your hand reached out to grab his. He stopped and turned to look at you.

Your eyes gazed back up into his. There was an appreciative smile hanging around your lips, yet your eyebrows were pulled together slightly.

Dean reached up and let his rough thumb smooth out the soft skin on your forehead. “What’s wrong?” he asked, stepping a little closer. You noticed he glanced down quickly toward your baby bump and worry flashed over his face for just a second. You shook your head as if to assure him it didn’t have anything to do with the baby. Not directly, anyway.

“I worry about you,” you confessed to him. You reached out to take his other hand as well so you were holding both of them.

Dean seemed genuinely surprised by that. “Me?” he asked. “Why would you be worried about me? Sweetheart, I’m good. You’re the one doing all the work here.” He got that expectant look on his face, the one he always got when he was waiting for his words to make you smile or chuckle.

You couldn’t, though. Not yet. Instead, the frown reappeared on your face.

“Hey,” he said, his voice now so soft you wanted to feel it against your skin. “What’s going on? You can tell me.”

“I know,” you nodded. “It’s just… Are you sure your little outburst just now had nothing to do with you being stressed? You know, about what’s to come?” Now it was your turn to glance down at your belly.

Dean let go of one of your hands to gently press two fingers underneath your chin and make you look back up at him again. “Trust me when I say, I have never felt more certain about anything in my life than I feel about us and our future right now.”

You closed your eyes, as if to savor this moment forever. Finally, you smiled.

Dean leaned in to press a soft kiss to your forehead. “And I’ll fix that crib as soon as possible,” he promised. “Even if it’s gonna take a bunch of hocus pocus to get it done.”

“Let’s eat first,” you reminded him while you started tugging him toward the doorway. But apparently Dean had yet to finish making his point known.

His face dead serious all of a sudden, “If anything is to blame, it’s this furniture from hell.”

“You mean Ikea?”

“That’s what I said; hell.” Dean shook his head. “The damn instructions don’t even have words in them, Y/N!” He sounded outraged, as if a great injustice had been laid upon him. “You can give me a completely dismantled car and I’ll put it back together just like that, no problem. But this… No, this is pure evil. I’m telling you.”

You laughed, amused by how deeply rooted Dean’s hate for instruction manuals apparently was. “All right, I get it,” you soothed him. “Now can we please go sit down? My feet are killing me.”

That seemed to snap Dean out of his tirade. He hadn’t realized how long you had been standing up straight already. Though to be fair, neither had you until that point, but you were glad Dean finally started walking with you toward the kitchen.

You promised to help out with building the cradle after dinner, and Dean accepted your offer under one condition.

“Nothing too physical,” he said. “Sammy and I can bring one of those chairs in from the library for you to sit in while you boss us around.”

A slap was heard as your hand came in contact with his arm.

“I mean ‘help’!” Dean quickly tried to save himself. “While you help us.”

His laughter did not do much for his credibility.

#JJ's fics #JJR100 #supernatural #dean x reader #spn drabble #fluff #angst #pregnant!reader #dean winchester #dean winchester drabble #spnfanficpond

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redschillzone · 4 years

Text

I Can't Help Falling In Love With You (Iden Versio x Reader)

(Gif found here!)

Pairing: Iden Versio x (Gender Neutral) Reader

Word Count: 3.0k Words

Warnings: None

Summary: After defecting from the Empire, Iden and Del join the Republic. It’s there that Iden begins to catch feelings for someone she once swore to be her enemy.

A/N: My first request! I hope I did okay. :3 Enjoy!

“We don’t even know how to fly x-wings.” Iden spoke as she followed the general into the hangar bay, where life just seemed to be teeming. She couldn’t help herself as she shifted her gaze every so often to inspect the area. Nearby pilots were getting ready for takeoff, mechanics working on the last few patches to the various ships littered in the area, and droids scurried about to join their respected pilots. It kinda reminded her of the Imperial hangars, only more messy. Various crates and tubes were scattered around the area and even though everything seemed in disarray, everyone knew exactly where everything was.

“Should be easy for special forces.” Lando spoke as he turned to face her and Del, placing a hand on his belt as he shifted his gaze between the two. Del was still on edge about this, but at this point what other choice did they have? They had seen what the Empire was doing, how wrong it all was. All the good they were told they were doing, the good they believed they were doing, turned out to be nothing but a bunch of lies; They were doing more harm than good and the two had enough. So, here they were, talking with a general about possibly joining the Republic.

“What’s the alternative, Iden?” Del spoke, watching his commander carefully as she hummed and turned away from him, putting her hands on her hips as she inspected the hangar around her, her eyes occasionally landing on your form as you worked on your ship, your droid beeping at you every so often beside you and you couldn’t help but laugh as the two of you made conversation, but she couldn’t make it out.

“So, what’s it going to be?” Lando asked, putting a hand on his own hip as he watched Iden think carefully. They didn’t have much choice, they could try and run for the rest of their lives but eventually they’d get dragged back into this war one way or another. Plus, she was certain Hask was on their tail, hunting them down so he could bring them back to the Empire for a proper punishment.

“We’ll do it.” She spoke, turning to face Lando who couldn’t help the grin that appeared on his face. A laugh rang out from the man as he held his hand out to Iden, who took it and shook.

“Well let me be the first to welcome you to the Republic.” He spoke, to which Iden gave a small smile as she shook his hand. He was far too happy for her liking. I mean, a war was raging on, and he always seemed to have some smile on his face. Well, from what she saw at least.

“Let’s get you out of those uniforms, hm?” He questioned before he turned and called out for you.

“Commander! Come here!” He called out to you, which you looked over. You gave your droid a small nod as you turned away from the x-wing and made your way over, dropping off the tools you were using on a nearby crate. The top half of your pilot suit currently hung around your waist, showing off the black, long sleeved shirt you had on under. Iden couldn’t help but watch your form, an eyebrow raised. You were a commander? To her you looked just like any other x-wing pilot, especially as you were working on the ship just a few moments ago. But then again, things did run differently in the Republic. She and Del were going to have to learn quickly.

“Yes General?” You asked, tilting your head as he put a hand on your shoulder.

“I’m placing these two under your supervision and in your squadron. Get them suited up and in any spare x-wings we have. Is that understood?” Lando told you, watching as you shifted your gaze to the two ex-imperials. Lando was putting them under your watch? You couldn’t help but let out a breath as you gave a small nod. You had enough on your plate as it was, but if this was what the general wanted then you were going to listen. You weren’t one for disobeying direct orders after all.

“Of course sir.” You spoke, facing Iden and Del once more before you gave a nod.

“Follow me.” You instructed before you made your way past them and headed deeper into the ship, the two following behind you. Iden watched your form quietly as you all walked, her mind racing at a thousand thoughts per second. She would have to learn that she was no longer a commander, but just a pilot. A soldier for the Republic now; She could no longer give the commands, that was all your call, but you could bet that she was going to speak her mind. She would have to work her way back up to that title of commander again, and she was going to do just that.

She let out a breath as she followed behind you, glancing around as everyone continued to go about their business, almost paying no mind to them. It was weird, she would admit but she just shook her head and continued to follow you until you reached the armory of the ship. You opened the door with the code required and made your way inside, she and Del following along before they watched as you dug around, finding the spare clothes and pilot outfits before you placed them out and looked at them.

“Go ahead and get dressed, I’ll be waiting outside this room. Don’t try anything funny, got it?” You spoke, waiting until they gave you a nod before you left the room so they could change. Iden watched as your form left the room and let out a breath before she grabbed her set of spare clothes and moved to the other side of the room, beginning to get changed as Del did the same.

“Did we make the right choice..?” Del commented as he changed, to which Iden gave a hum as she threw her imperial pilot suit to the side and began to get changed into the orange pilot suit that labeled her as a rebel now.

“I think so.” She spoke, glancing back at him for a short moment before she returned her gaze forward. It was going to take some time, but she believed they could get used to this.

-------

“Destroying that factory had a bigger impact than we thought.” Iden spoke as she watched the holograms appear on the console before her. In just the span of a few months she had grown used to how everything in the Republic worked, how everything ticked and she was honestly a bit surprised. She didn’t think she’d fit in so well here, and Del was just as surprised at how welcoming the Rebels actually were to them. But if anything surprised her more, it was how hard she was beginning to fall for you. The day they arrived and you led them into the fight to destroy the satellites around Naboo, she felt something she didn’t feel with very many people. She was beginning to care for you, and it began to scare her. She was afraid that if she grew close to you, she’d lose you. She’d have to see you eventually die to the side she was once on, and it scared her to death. So, she repressed those feelings for you. She kept them locked away and shoved them to the deepest corners of her mind.

But whenever she’d walk in the hangar or the debriefing room, she’d see some hotshot pilot flirting with you; Some officer showering you in compliments that you politely thanked them for before you continued with your work. She couldn’t help but feel that spark of jealousy fill her chest whenever she saw those engagements happening. Del could tell something was going on with her whenever he would catch her eyes lingering on your form a little longer than it should whenever you gave your debrief of the mission, or when you were talking to your squadron right before a mission in the hangar. He had tried several times to get a confession from her, but she remained tight lipped and didn’t spill a word.

When the new Inferno Squadron was made under Leia’s command, Iden couldn’t help but feel a little upset about it. She would be the commander of the squadron, and she didn’t mind that, it was the fact that she’d see less and less of you; Of your smiling face whenever she’d come into the room, of your conversations you two would have as she watched you work on your x-wing, of hearing your commands whenever you two went into battle together. She would miss it all, but she knew that they were getting closer to the end of this war, and maybe when it came to an end she’d tell you how she really felt.

“Admiral Ackbar is calling all Republic ships to Jakku.” She spoke with confidence, watching as Del and Shriv listened to her talk. She missed when you were there with them, when you would jump in at random points to add your own bit of information and it would bring a bit of laughter to the room. She couldn’t help the small sigh that escaped her before she continued on.

“The whole Imperial fleet is there, minus the equipment they would have received from Sullust. I expect my father to be there too, but catching him is no longer our priority. This battle could end the war…” She spoke, a hopeful tone to her voice as Del listened to her, his arms crossed as he watched the holograms change with almost every word she said. They were so close to ending this war, to having the freedom they all craved. This battle would determine it, and by the Maker were they going to give it everything they had.

“Let’s get in, and do what we can to help.” She finished, looking between Shriv and Del who both nodded and made their way to their respected positions. Iden watched the hologram of the Imperial fleet quietly, letting out a breath as she went ahead and turned the table off. Slowly she began to make her way to the hangar, glancing around quietly as she did so. She swore to herself that if they made it out of this battle alive, she’d make her move on you. She’d tell you everything she felt about you, how you made her feel, how she wanted to live a long and happy life with you. She’d tell you it all.

As she made her way into the hangar, your voice was the first thing that hit her ears. You were informing your squadron of the plan, to strike hard at the Empire with everything you all had. She couldn’t help but smile as she walked over, listening quietly.

“If this battle goes according to plan, we’ll have won the war. We can all go home and live happy lives. So make sure to give it your all, got it?” You spoke with confidence, it dripped from your words and your squadron gave a ‘Yes commander!’ before breaking apart. Only one squad mate stayed behind to talk to you, and you raised an eyebrow as they made their way over; Iden on the other hand could already feel the jealousy starting up as she watched.

“So Commander, I was just wondering if.. Maybe when this is all over, if you wanted t-” They started, but the words never came out as you gave them a stern look.

“Pilot, is now really the time to be asking me on a date?” You barked at them, to which they tensed and quickly gave a ‘Sorry’ before rushing to their ship. You couldn’t help but roll your eyes at their attempt to flirt before you turned, stopping once you saw Iden and gave a small smile.

“Ah, Commander Versio. A pleasure to see you again.” You smiled, to which Iden chuckled lightly.

“Commander. I uh, came to wish you good luck.” Iden spoke, standing with her hands behind her back. You couldn’t help but chuckle lightly as you put your hand on her shoulder. She could feel the blush rising on her cheeks, but she did a great job of keeping her face neutral.

“Iden, I don’t need luck.” You grinned, patting her shoulder before you pulled away from her.

“I’ll see you when we’ve won the war!” You spoke, rushing over to your x-wing before you climbed inside. She watched your retreating form, a small smile on her face. Maker, she really did fall hard for you. Your determination to win this battle was something she admired, and your courage was something she loved. She gently shook her head, as much as she loved thinking about you, now was not the time. There was a battle to be fought, and as you had told her, you two would see each other again soon.

-------

The hangar was alive with the cheers and laughter of the Rebels who fought a lifetime for this moment, for the moment that they had finally won the war. Iden glanced around the hangar with a small smile on her face, Del standing beside her as they watched the celebrations ring out through the bay. But as they watched, neither of them saw you, and it began to fill Iden with fear. Did you die during that mission? No, there was no way you died. You were an ace pilot, an amazing soldier and an even better commander. There was no way a mission like that would take you out. You had told her you’d see her again, you wouldn’t let that die with you, would you?

Letting out a breath, Iden began to wander, her eyes scanning each face she passed. None were yours, and the feeling began to grow, festering inside her as she continued to walk. People were hugging their friends, kissing their loved ones, and overall just celebrating what just happened. It began to make her feel sick; If you had died on that mission and she didn’t get to tell you what she felt, she could never live with herself. Tears were beginning to form as she continued her search; You weren’t dead. You couldn’t be dead. She had so much she wanted to tell you, how you were one of the most amazing people she had ever met, how much she loved you and wanted nothing more but to hold you in her arms as you guys finally settled down on some planet, watching the night sky and just talking as she ran her fingers through your hair.

It wasn’t until she heard your laughter that she began to relax. She whipped herself in your direction, watching as you were hugging your squad mates, tears in your eyes at the fact that the very thing you had fought for just about your whole life was finally happening.

Slowly Iden began to relax as she made her way over, but stopped midway as the same squad mate from earlier hugged you, only they held you a little too long. Their hands placed a little too close to your ass and that jealousy sparked in Iden once more.

‘You swore to yourself you’d do it, Versio. Better now then never.’ She told herself before she began to cross the hangar to you, watching as you and your squad mate pulled away before you noticed her, a grin appearing on your face.

“Iden I’m so glad you’re al-” You started, but the words were quickly snuffed out as Iden crashed her lips to yours, her eyes shut tightly as she pulled you close to her body. You were frozen to the spot, but it didn’t take you very long to return the long awaited kiss. Your eyes slowly fluttered shut as you placed your hands on her cheeks, gently rubbing your thumbs across her skin. The kiss was passionate, slow even as Iden was trying to put months of yearning for you into one kiss. You were the first to break away, panting heavily as you opened your eyes to look at Iden, a chuckle leaving your form.

“J-Jealous, Commander?” You grinned at her, to which she chuckled and held you as close as she could.

“You have no idea...” She told you, holding you as close as she could. She finally had you, she was holding you in her arms and she swore to herself she would never let you go. She would watch over you with each passing second, and you swore you would do the same with her. You couldn’t help the laugh that escaped you before you kissed her once more, this one sweeter than the other and Iden gladly returned it. It didn’t take long for the kiss to grow a little needy and heated, but a throat was cleared nearby which caused you two to pull away and look towards Del, who was shaking his head lightly at the two of you.

“Save it for the bedroom, would you?” He joked, going over to give you a hug once you pulled away from Iden.

“Oh shut up, Del.” You said as you smacked his arm once you pulled away from the hug, a blush appearing on your face as Iden smiled. He chuckled, looking towards Iden and gave her a hug as well before he left to find Shriv and the others. Iden watched his retreating form before looking at you once more, going and taking your hands in hers.

“I love you.” She spoke, her grip tightening on your hands as you stared at her with wide eyes. You felt the tears beginning to prick at the corner of your eyes before you pulled her into a tight hug, to which she gladly returned as she wrapped her arms around your waist tightly. You were never going to let her go, not now that she was safe and in your arms. And she was never going to let you go. You were hers now, and she didn’t have to fight with some hotshot pilot to talk with you, some officer to give you compliments. Oh no, that was all her job now. And she couldn’t be happier to hear those five words leave your mouth.

“I love you too, Iden…”

#Star wars #Iden Versio x Reader #Iden Versio #Battlefront 2 #battlefront ii #Star wars battlefront 2 #Star wars battlefront ii #Star Wars Iden Versio

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bausbitch · 4 years

Text

Different music tastes

Reid x kpop Stan! reader

Crack and fluff ig idk lmfao

Lmfao I'm writing this on my phone and it's one am but fuck it 🤪🤩

In which Spencer's s/o //read: you// likes kpop 🤪

!!! Gif not mine I also don't know where I got it just check Pinterest!!!

You were,,, in fact,,, a kpop stan

And so were most of you friends

But your bf, none other than doctor spencer reid,,,, was not

He didn't know when he started dating you

In fact

He didn't know until you moved in 2 yrs later

So it was a big surprise for him

When you came in to your newly bought shared apartment with a box

"Hey honey I got the last of my stuff I'll unpack it later I'mma take a shower" - you, right before disaster

Ok so before the shitshow lemme explain how y'all met

You were, in your humble opinion, Garcia's best sibling

And you were kinda funky too

Y'all shared the same energy yknow???

And so one day

You went to bring her food

And the bau was in the middle of staying overnight for a case

So you were like

I'll be the best sibling™

And bring everyone food

So when you walked in there at like

What

3 am???

Chewing gum by none other than my boys nct dream in your headphones and a nakamoto mf yuta photo card in the back of your phone

Can you tell they're my ult group???

You looked like a h*cking angel with bags of take out as wings

They greeted you v v nicely

The young doctor

Who you so happened to be the same age as

Paid a lil bit extra attention to you

And blushed a lot

But he

Omg poor boy

Noticed

FREAKING

Christopher bang from stray kids

As your wallpaper

And he thought he was your bf

Ugh I wish

And he asked he was like

"Your boyfriend seems nice"

He asked bc like

You are so fine and he can't not talk to you

And Penelope was like

"Pfft! She wishes!" P, before you kicked her leg under the table

Spencer was like

Huh???

Wym wishes???

But he wrote it off and kept talking to you

And then you fell in love

Once in a while you'd call him crying at 3 am

Probably because of a comeback you weren't prepared for

Or because you missed him

Probably the first one

Ok an e WAYS

Remember the box???

Yeah

That was your merch

Ok maybe it wasn't just one box

But you had like

Put that in other boxes

So you could be discreet

Shhh

Don't be suspicious

But that box in particular

Had like

Your photo card album

And like

A few of your most precious albums

And maybe like the mamamoo lightstick??

Ok ok ok I'm getting ahead of myself

While you were singing to something Spence couldn't hear because of ✨shower noises✨

Probably like fancy by twice or something

He was like

"Oh hey let me surprise them by helping them unpack this mysterious box" - doctor genius

When he opened the box omg

There was an album that looked pretty normal

And he was like

Aww my baby's memories :(!!

So he opened it

And bam

Chaeyoung from twice

Xiaojun from wayv/nct

Yeji from itzy

Taeyong from nct

And a bunch of other hot Asian people

Staring back at him

And while he may be a genius

Ya boy didn't know much about Korean pop

So he

Omg

He thought you knEW ALL THESE HOT PEOPLE

And he was

Astonished

To say the least

He saw wonho from Monsta X and he was like

*woah he's hot"

Bisexual reid is cannon stfu 😤

But then he realized how ripped he was

And he's like

Damn

I'm skinny skinny

But he was like

Yeah but they knows him

But

They're dating ME

Que dramatic hair flip

And he kept flipping and he was like

My baby knows so many people wow

So he put that off to the side

And kept looking

And then hoe found the lightstick

HE THOUGHT IT WAS A VIBRATOR

SO HE WAS LIKE

"Uuuuhhhhhhhh-" While shoving it back into the box

And then he saw the albums and he was like

He didn't open them though

NCT???

Maybe a cult or smth

2 times????

Twice

Lost children????

Stray kids Spence honey please focus

Isn't red velvet a cake flavor

Peekaboo is a game

Love talk???

So he looked it up

Big mistakes

Why?

Because the song he looked up

Was LOVE TALK BY WAYV

If you don't know the song

Lmfao how'd you get this far

Some of the songs very colorful lyrics include

"Touch me, tease me, feel me up" WayV, 2019

Spence was

To say the least

Very flustered

And ya boy was like

Wtfwtfwtf

Who are these people

My so knows famous people

Uhhh

And has a photo album of them

Umm

I'm proud ig???

And so you walk out

And you're kinda like

Surprised Pikachu

When you see him

With the box open

And you both look at each other and he goes

"It's actually more common to meet a celebrity when you don't actually know who they are"

And you start WHEEZING

And he's like

Huh

And you're like

"Did you think I know all those people???"

And he's like

"Well yeah you have a very well put photo album of their selfies and they're albums and I recognize two of them from the back and wallpaper of your phone the night we met"

And you explain

Kpop

Biases

And all that stuff

And he's like

"So what's that green vibrator thing?"

And you're like????

Then he motions to the lightstick and you laugh once again

And you're like

"We bang those around at concerts to show love and stuff"

And so you go on

With life

And you guys even end up going to a concert together

It's an ateez concert

And he's very surprised when the crowd yells

"Bad bitch Puerto Rican" Out of nowhere

And at the office he's even funnier

"Did you know there's a Korean boy group with 21 men in it? They're called NCT, neo culture technology and-"

AND JJ IS LIKE

"what the hell is he talking about"

And Penelope's like

"Yn why must you do this"

And you're like

"He figured it out on his own ok he opened my box 😤"

LMFAO WHAT GOES THROUGH MY BRAIN

Also!!! My requests are open and I only do bullet stories!!!!

#blackpink #wayv #criminal minds #nct #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n

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bensakindofmagic · 4 years

Text

As Hard

(gif creds to @queenmercurys)

okay i wrote a thing, cause apparently i can't stop writing at the moment (it’s all this goddamn fresh content). i hope yous aren't complaining. it’s for courtney’s writing challenge (@ijustreallylovezebras // @writingfortoomanyfandoms) and I KNOW THE DEADLINE WAS SUNDAY BUT IM A LAZY HOE so you can have it now <3

(also know this isn't the lovely fluffy content that usually surfaces this time of year but there you go. hope you like it anyway)

Warnings: ANGST, mentions of death

w/c: 2.6k+

based on this prompt:

“I should have made it as hard for you to leave me as it is now for me to leave you” - Jane Eyre by Charlotte Brontë

(ALSO i went a tiny bit abstract with the prompt, cause my initial idea was basically the same as a chapter i just wrote for my series [but you’ll have to wait a wee while to read that ;) ], so i went with this instead. anyway, i’ll shut up and let you read now)

Begins below the cut

Ben looked in on his sleeping daughter and decided to let her lie in a little longer. He smiled at the sight of her; she was the light of his life, the most precious thing in the world to him. She was sleeping soundly, her face the picture of serenity. Those moments were like gold to him. He never wanted to see her cry again.

Lily. His wife had chosen the name. He recalled the moment she told him she was pregnant. She’d been nervous; they weren’t married back then, but it was one of the happiest days of his life.

“Ben, love, can I talk to you?”

The tension in his shoulders was involuntary. Those words made him nervous. “Yeah, of course. What’s wrong?” He tried to act nonchalant.

She sat down beside him on the sofa. He could hear the shallowness of her breathing. She looked mildly terrified and instantly Ben’s nerves on his own behalf switched to worrying about her. Her skin was pale and clammy — was she sick?

She breathed out slowly. “Okay look, here’s the thing… I’m pregnant.”

His whole world stood still, the word bounced around in his head. Pregnant.

Vaguely he heard her muttering something and forced himself to tune back in.

“… understand if you’re not ready to have a baby, but I don’t think we should just jump into getting rid of it—”

“Getting rid of it?! No, angel, I don’t want to get rid of it,” he grinned, finally letting his joy shine though his face. “It’s your choice and I’ll support you whatever, but baby there is nothing I want more than to start a family with you.”

Her relief was palpable, as her lips spit into a smile and she collapsed in his arms, letting him pull her close. “Thank god,” she whispered.

Ben pulled back and wiped away a tear with his thumb, before kissing her with all the strength he could muster.

“We’re having a baby,” he chirped, elated and overwhelmed.

She bit her lip as she smiled — he always loved when she did that — and hummed, “You’re gonna be a daddy."

Lily had been born healthy and beautiful, and he had fallen in love with her instantly. It was a moment unlike anything he had ever felt before, sitting next to the love of his life on the hospital bed as she held their new baby in her arms. She had sobbed, exhausted but overjoyed, and he had kissed her forehead and told her how well she had done. It had been a tricky birth but she was a trooper. He couldn’t have been more proud of her.

He had proposed a couple of years later, on their anniversary, and when Lily was two they were married. She had been a flower girl for them — she loved dressing up in her little frock, and was very pleased to take as much attention as she could away from her mum. Luckily Y/N had loved every second of it, and smiled constantly. She had never looked more beautiful.

Ben stumbled as he thought of that day, and he had to grip onto the arm of the sofa to stop himself from falling. It still felt like a knife wound in his chest. Most of the time now he could think of her and carry on, but their wedding day? That was too much. Ben was tired, he ached. He sat heavily on the sofa and let his bones sink. He didn’t fight the tears that fell from his eyes, he had learned long ago that there was no use in fighting, so he let them roll solemnly down his cheeks.

But he heard the gentle patter of little feet on the floor and sat up, wiping his face.

Much against the wishes of his body, Ben had hauled himself out of bed. He could have ignored the muffled cries of his baby daughter coming from the kitchen and Y/N’s gentle lullaby, it was the gnawing anxiety at the fact that she had been trying to get Lily to sleep for nearly an hour that kept him from sleeping. He squinted against the light, but heard how frayed Y/N’s voice was. She sounded tired, and a little frazzled. When his eyes adjusted he saw her disheveled hair and panicked eyes.

“Love—”

She spun on her heel; her fear was written all over her face.

“She won’t settle. I don’t know what’s wrong with her, she just won’t stop crying.” He could hear in her voice how close she was to tears.

“You’re stressed love, and tired. You know how babies can tell when you’re anxious.”

“I don’t know if that’s it, Ben.”

“I’m sure she’s fine. Give her to me darling, go get some sleep. You need it.”

She was clearly still a little unconvinced, but relieved to let him take over. He knew she was struggling with being a mum more than she had admitted. She had wanted a baby for such a long time, Ben didn’t suppose it had ever occurred to her that she might find it hard. Of course, he knew she was doing an incredible job, but she beat herself up too much over the little things. He’d have to talk to her about it, or maybe ask his mum to. She’d listen to his mum.

She carefully placed the little bundle in his arms and kissed him. She whispered, “Thank you,” and wandered back to the bedroom, half asleep already.

Ben looked down at the tiny face of his daughter. It was contorted in mid-wail, but he sat down on the sofa and laid her on his lap while he pulled his tshirt off. Then he unwrapped Lily from her blanket, took her baby-grow off, and placed her on his bare chest before covering her back over with the blanket. She still cried, though a little quieter when he started rubbing her back with a hand that was almost the same size as her. She nuzzled her cheek into his chest and started to settle with a little groan and a gurgle. He nestled his finger into her closed fist, and she latched onto it, squeezing it with all the might. He smiled; he would never get tired of that. He hummed a gentle lullaby until her eyes drifted closed and her could lay her back in her cot.

When he went back to the bedroom, Y/N was fast asleep. Contented to see his two best girls both sleeping peacefully, he climbed into bed and pulled Y/N close, kissing her cheek and whispering that he loved her.

“You didn’t wake me up daddy,” said Lily, stifling a yawn.

“I know petal, I thought I’d let you have a lie in.”

She clambered up onto the sofa next to him and latched her little arms around his neck. “But we’re going to see mummy today. You promised.”

“It’s okay, she’ll still be there. Go get dressed and do your teeth, then we’ll go see mum.”

She planted a delicate kiss on his cheek and raced off to to her bedroom. His heart swelled; thank god he still had Lily.

She was ready in record time and appeared from her room with a few bits of paper in her hands.

“I’ve done some drawings for mummy. Please can I take them?”

“Of course you can, darling. I think she’ll love them. Have you got her letter, too?”

She nodded; she always took a letter.

She was quieter than she used to be. Her mother had been strict on manners but she used to have a naughty streak to her; Y/N always used to laugh that she got that from her dad. That was gone now, or at least subdued. Ben prayed that she would get it back, in time.

He picked up the flowers he’d bought the day before and took his little girl’s hand, leading her to the car.

It wasn’t a long drive, and they soon parked. Ben and Lily walked hand in hand down the path that ran alongside the church. When they passed the big oak tree Lily knew the way, so he let her run ahead.

“Be careful of the big roots Lily, mind you don’t trip!” he called after her, but she wasn’t listening.

When he caught up with her, she had already laid her drawings down against her mum’s headstone.

“Is that mummy?” he asked, pointing to the woman in the drawing.

Lily nodded, “And that’s you and that’s me.”

“We look very happy.”

“I thought that’s what mummy would have wanted.”

“It is petal, it is.”

He took the old flowers out of the vase and put the new bunch in — lilies of course — before taking his daughter’s hand once more. It was still so tiny, engulfed in his large one.

“Happy birthday to you,

Happy birthday to you,

Happy birthday dear Lily,

Happy birthday to you!”

Ben and Y/N cheered and Lily blew out all four candles on her birthday cake in one go. Ben lifted her up and twirled her round the room, her dress flaring out behind her. She giggled in that joyful way that children do, and Ben grinned. He could hardly contain his glee.

She hadn’t wanted a birthday party, saying that she only wanted her mum and dad there. Ben had felt guilty: he’d been away a lot filming just lately and he knew the girls missed him. Y/N would never say but she wished he didn’t travel so often, and Lily was always happiest when they were all together. Spending her birthday with his beautiful little family reminded him how lucky he was. As he watched his wife cut his daughter’s birthday cake, he promised himself he would make for time for them, be home more often. He would be the best dad he could.

Lily merrily ran off to get her new toys once they’d eaten their cake, and while she was occupied Ben pulled Y/N onto his lap. She squealed and laughed and it was music to him. He threaded his arms around her waist and let her lean back, resting his chin on her shoulder. She hummed contentedly when he kissed her neck.

“I’m going to be home more this year.”

“It that right?” she pondered.

“I promise. I want to spend more time with you two.”

“That would be nice.” He could hear her smiling.

“And I’ve been thinking—”

“Dangerous.”

He chuckled, “I adore our little family, but how would you feel if it got a little bigger?”

She turned to him, eyes wide. “Really?”

He nodded, gnawing at his lip.

She beamed, “I would love that.”

As Ben kissed his wife he let his hand trail towards her thigh, and felt her smile against his lips.

It was only a few weeks later that Y/N had collapsed one Sunday afternoon and he’d rushed her to hospital. After that everything was a blur. They knew from the start that it was terminal but when she slipped away two months later it still came as a shock. It had all happened so fast, Ben had barely had time to process it, let alone Lily. She lost her mum at the age of four. He worried constantly what that would do to her, and how to be both mum and dad to her. It was an endless struggle, mourning for the death of the only woman he had ever loved, and learning to be a single parent. The last two years had been hell, but he finally felt like there was some light in his life again.

“Do you want to read your letter to mum?”

Lily shook her head, “She knows what it says,” and lay down the letter next to her drawings. For a while they both stood, quietly grieving in each other’s company. When Lily sighed and started to fidget next to him, Ben knew she was ready to go.

“Why don’t you go and wait in the car, sweetheart? I want to talk to mummy in private for a minute. I promise I won’t be long.”

She nodded and set off. He watched her until she was safely back in the car before turning back to the headstone.

He read the words he had chosen:

Unable are the loved to die. For love is immortality.

They were Emily Dickinson’s words. He trusted her to know what she was talking about, despite the fact that at the time he didn’t believe them in the slightest. Now, perhaps, he was starting to see what she meant. Perhaps.

“Oh love, my darling girl…”

He broke down, sobs wracked his body. He just missed her so goddamn much. She had been his whole world, the love of his life, she had given him the most precious gift in their beautiful daughter, and she was gone. Forever.

Eventually he composed himself, and placed a hand on her grave. The stone was cold beneath his fingers.

“God, I miss you. I thought it would get easier but it hasn’t, I’ve just got better at living with the the hole that you left. I’m still mad at you, you know. For leaving us. That was a real dick move.”

He sighed, shaking his head with a small chuckle.

“Not that it was your fault. I know you’d still be with us if you could. But Lily’s doing well, you’d be so proud of her, baby. She’s still a little quiet but she’s getting more confident these days, you can see it. And she’s so smart too, she really got your brains. She’s cleverer than me already, it’s embarrassing. She gets more and more like you every day.” He took a deep, shuddering breath.

“I suppose you want to know how I’m doing? Ha, well I’m okay. I miss you, but I already told you that. I think I’m doing better though. For a while there it was really just Lily that kept me going. I don’t know what I would have done without her. I was just trying to make to the next day, so that I could be there for her, but I think I’m ready to start living for me again. She’s everything to me, you know, but maybe I’m ready to get back into the world a little bit.”

Suddenly Ben was able to unload all the thoughts that had been swirling around in his head, weighing him down. You always made it so easy for him to talk to you, even when you weren’t there.

“I feel kinda guilty though, like I’m leaving you behind. I don’t want to forget you, I don’t want to move on from you, I just want to move forward. I can’t keep living in this pit, I… I don’t know. Not that you need me to tell you any of this. I know you wanted me to move on, find someone else. I don’t know about that, but I think I’m ready to start embracing life again. But you should know that there’s no one in the world like you, no one else I could ever love the way I love you.”

He felt tears prickle at his eyes again, and he knew it was time to go.

“Christ Y/N, I should have made it as hard for you to leave me as it is now for me to leave you. Maybe then we’d still be together.”

His head dropped, his shoulders fell heavy. He kissed his fingers and pressed them against the name carved in the stone. His wife. His rock.

“I have to go, Lily’s waiting, but I'll see you soon. I love you.”

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