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jeankluv · 3 days

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I love you, it’s ruining my life - Geto Suguru

Words: 1,5k

Summary: You stood besides Geto for over a decade but despite loving him so much, it was ruining you.

Tags: heavy angst, canon, set during 2017-2018, blood, mentions of death, no happy ending, a bit of Gojo x reader but not romantic, no use of y/n, gn!reader

Notes: a request and a one shot in a single day, yep 🤭

Jujutsu Kaisen materialist

When he decided to leave, you left with him.

More than 10 years had passed since then, you were no longer kids, you had changed. Even though there were mornings where you looked in the mirror and still saw the 17 year old student you once were. But when you looked at him, there was nothing left of that 17 year old boy.

You still loved him and you would probably always, but that love was consuming you.

But that day, you didn't see the 17 year old girl, what you saw in the mirror was a tired young woman, with a dull face and dark circles under her eyes. You felt like all your color was completely gone.

Existing your room, you walked through the hallway until you spot Suguru’s silhouette, I was talking to Miguel, apparently there was a course that Suguru was interested in obtaining. Passing by, you walked and saw a couple of people waiting for Suguru to serve them. Your heart was squeezed when you thought about the fate they would have.

You had accompanied Suguru for all these years, but you had never been able to agree with his ideas and until that day they continued to make you nauseous.

You sighed and went outside, where you sat on one of the benches there. In the distance you could see Tokyo and the memories of when you were a teenager began to come to you. Would you be there if you had realized earlier how Suguru was? If you had tried harder? If I had supported him more? Everything was what ifs... That they would never be, you answered and you could only imagine what could have been.

“You are here.” A deep voice, spoke behind your back. “Geto is looking for you.”

You stood up and nodded slowly. Walking towards where Suguru was, you felt your heart flutter nervously. You opened the door and found him sitting on his “throne”. When you entered you could see traces of blood on the floor. You turned your head, feeling the vomit rise in your throat.

"I'm sorry." Suguru murmured from his seat. “I thought it would take you longer so you wouldn't see the blood of that dirty monkey, but you came.”

“Suguru…” You tremble. “Don't you think that's enough…?”

"What do you mean?" He rose from his throne.

“What I mean…” Your heart fluttered. “Let's go Suguru, let's go away.” You approached him. “You, the girls and me. Far from everything…”

Suguru's gaze was cold. “Do you hear yourself?” He smiled zinicly. “Do you want to run away? After all these years? Of my progress? Don’t be foolish.”

“Suguru… please…” Your eyes stung.

Suguru snorted and moved away from your touch and it was then, seeing his back, that the boy who once swore he would love you forever, died long ago.

“I know you loved me.” You looked down. “But you don’t love me anymore.” Those words were heavy on you, it felt like stones being thrown at yourself.

“That’s what you think?” Suguru asked

“I don’t think that, it’s what it is, Suguru.” You held back your tears, not wanting to cry in front of him. “The only times we are intimate it’s when you want to have sex, the rest of the time… I don’t even see you because you are to focus on killing people.”

“Monkeys, those are not people, they are monkeys.” You shook your head trying to ignore his words. “Don’t tell me you don’t agree with what we are doing.” He approached you and you took a step back.

“I don’t think I ever did Suguru.”

“Then why? Why did you follow me?” His tone was clear, he was angry.

“Because I love you!” You raised your voice. “I love you Suguru, I always did. And you needed me back then… you needed someone and I… I couldn’t leave you.”

“So you never truly believed in what I was doing…”

“That’s what matters to you?” You raised your gaze facing him. “If I agree with what you are doing?”

“Yes!” He was the one to shut this time. “You were the… the only one who stayed and I thought it was because you agreed but it was because you loved me.” A hoarse laugh came from his throat. “You thought that if you came with me and with that love of yours I was going to change?”

He looked at you and you said nothing, because yes, your foolish self really thought it was going to be able to change him, to make him go back and try to find a solution to what he did. But you were a fool and even 10 years later you were still a fool, because deep down you were still hoping you could make him understand.

“I won’t change, I will never change, I will kill all those monkeys and create a world where only sorcerers exist.” He sat down. “If you want to leave, I won’t stop you.”

The first tear rolled down your cheek. “I love you Suguru.” You said. “But it’s ruining my life.”

Suguru stayed silent, not saying a word, not saying anything. This wasn’t the guy you fell in love with, years ago, that boy wouldn’t stare at you and do nothing.

You stepped away and turned around to leave the room. Before exiting the room, you look at him one last time.

“I love you Suguru, I will always love you.” You whipped the tears away and left the room.

After that last look, the days passed and turned into weeks and the weeks turned into months. Suguru never looked for you, you were alone. You couldn't go back to where you were once happy because that would doom you and you couldn't go back to the person you loved because she was long dead.

You looked up and saw the snow falling. The new year had begun with snow. You hugged your body and walked through the new streets of the small town you had moved to. There you could simply be you and help those like you who could see curses and didn't understand it.

“The ground is slippery over there.” A voice spoke behind you.

You stopped dead when you heard it, how many years had it been since you had heard that voice? You didn't even know it anymore.

You carefully turned to confirm that the owner of that voice was the one who was once your best friend. And indeed, a few meters away from you was Gojo Satoru. Taller than the last time he saw it that October afternoon. Unlike that time, his eyes were completely covered by a white blindfold.

“Satoru…” You murmured.

“You lost weight.” He simply said.

Ignoring his words, you went straight to the point. “Are you here to execute me?” You asked him, trying to pretend that your voice was shaky.

Satoru shook his head. “Why would I?” Before you could answer he continued. “There is no execution order for you, so there is no reason for me to execute you.”

“What?” You said stunned. "How is that possible? I spent years with him, they should…”

“You were never considered a threat like him and I asked them not to include you on the list of cursed sorcerers.”

You pursed your lips and nodded. "Thanks, I guess." You hugged yourself tighter, to stop yourself from shaking. “What are you doing here then Satoru?”

"He is dead."

Your breath caught and your heart skipped a couple of beats before it began to break. Suguru was dead… Suguru… You stifled a cry, not wanting to cry in front of Satoru.

“I’m sorry…” Satoru whispered.

“Why are you sorry for?” Your voice coming out like a whisper from your throat.

“It was me…”

And then a cold breeze hit your face.

You shook your head and looked up at the sky trying to stop the crying. “It’s what you had to do…” You heard Satoru's footsteps approaching you. “Did he say something before he died?”

“He gave me this.” Satoru took your hand and placed an object on it. “He told me he was sorry and that I love you until the last moment.” You carefully opened your hand, finding a ring.

You clenched your fist to your chest and began to sob. You felt Satoru's warm body wrap around you and try to calm those sobs that didn't stop coming out of you. After a few minutes, you managed to calm down and separated from Satoru.

“Thank you…” You said.

Satoru handed you a folded piece of paper. “My number and Shoko's are written down. Call us when you need it or if... if you want to come back there again. Yaga won’t care and if the old guys say something, I’ll take care of it.”

You looked at the paper and then at Satoru. “I'll keep that in mind Satoru… thank you.”

“Take care.” He said and turned around to walk off.

You saw his silhouette get into a car and then disappear. Opening your hand again, you looked at the ring again.

“I love you Suguru.” You murmured kissing the ring and letting once again your tears flow.

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cfr749 · 16 hours

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Initial Thoughts on Chenford in 6x07

All right... I'm feeling... a lot at the moment, so just sharing my initial reactions before seeing anyone else's. I'm sure my feelings will evolve. Also this turned into a GD essay and I'm sorry.

The Good

Grey acknowledging that Lucy was going through a lot ABOVE & BEYOND the break up. I just wish he'd mentioned the shooting, too. Lucy deserves to be more than her relationship with Tim and I need to actually see that in the future.

Lucy laying out 2 key things in her conversation with Grey - how easily Tim walked away and that he had no right to make that decision for her

Prior to the last scene (see The Ugly below), I thought Tim's interactions with the therapist were reasonably well done; if only therapy was that easy in real life lol

"You've always got a home with me" - I loved this final scene between Lucy and Tamara. I don't really have feelings either way about Tamara at this point, and this still hit me right in the heart.

Smitty's poll made me laugh, but also another solid indicator that these writers / producers do in fact really enjoy laughing at the expense of the fandom and shippers (which, whatever, I don't care that they do, I'd prob do the same; but it does irk me when people act like these writers should be worshipped because of all the things they "give" us)

The Tim

"I'm not depressed. I broke up with her."

"I was her TO." Not her friend, cuz god knows Tim has yet to deal with the fact that he started banging his former Rookie I suppose.

I dunno whether to put this in The Good or The Bad at this point; it depends on where they take it, so instead Tim gets a section all about why he's a dick.

To be clear, I do not like that Tim is a dick. But I actually do kind of like that it is very clear TO THE AUDIENCE that Tim is being kind of a dick. Do I still think people will bend over backwards to defend him? Of course they will.

From my perspective, I love Tim, I understand that he thinks he's doing the right thing, and has lots and lots of trauma. I've never seen Tim as a character that magically healed at some point between Seasons 1 & 5 (please see his storyline with his dad, his ongoing issues with UC work and unwillingness to confront or deal with them, his feelings about therapy historically, his inability to dump Ashley, etc. etc.). He's never been perfect and he doesn't need to be.

All of those things are true. None of those things give him a free pass to be kind of a dick. He still has to take accountability for how he treated Lucy (which, to be clear, was like sh*t).

The Bad

Lucy being petty AF with the invites to Tamara's dinner - let her be ANGRY, but give me villain Lucy over this dumb sh*t.

Lucy having no one other than Grey to talk to.

Others acting like Lucy is actually kind of pathetic (why do these writers love sh*tting on her so much? girl could not be down and kicked any harder at this point) -- Celina / Nolan and the double dumping crap, Lucy thinking Grey paid actors and him telling her she was out of her damn mind

The last interaction between Lucy and Tim. I am so angry for her. I needed to see that from her, but instead it felt kind of like her being dumped / a kicked puppy all over again. We got it, thanks. What's next? Lucy being incredibly happy with the hottest man on earth? I'm here for it tbh. Lucy plotting Tim's murder? Also here for it at this point. LOL.

The Ugly

I could not hate the implication of that final scene with Tim and the therapist and the door shutting more. There was ZERO reason they couldn't have had him show up during the day, and it actually disgusts me that they are pushing this line again, but especially with Tim. I am literally NEVER this dramatic, but in this case I really hope they did that to just get a reaction, because if anything were to actually happen between Tim and the therapist, I'd be 100% done with this ship and show as would a whole lot of the audience (I think). If I kept watching, it would only be to see Lucy be absurdly happy without Tim.

Well, what'd I miss? What did y'all think?

#chenford #the rookie #the rookie spoilers #see lana ramble #no one tell the writers that women can have storylines that are not about BABIES

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shadowlali · 1 day

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Hi, I love the way you write (You literally write 3 of my favorite COD men)

If you could I would love a Fem/Reader with either Rodolfo or Alejandro and they’re teaching you how to dance for an upcoming wedding. (It’s cool if you wanna make it SFW/NSFW).

Anyway I hope you keep writing because it gives me life haha

tú y yo

COD - Rudy Parra x fem!reader

[18+] wc: ~800 summary: Rudy teaches you how to dance. masterlist | AO3

warnings: NSFW, no use of Y/N nor too many details on reader’s appearance, some proofreading, oral (f! receiving), size kink (kinda), unprotected sex

a/n: hi nonnie, thank you so so much for the support! 🤍🤍🤍

“Move your hips,” Rudy whispers in your ear, “just like this, nena.” [babygirl]

Soft music plays from the speaker through the living room. The coffee table is pushed to the wall and the center of the room is left empty, perfect space for Rudy to teach you how to dance. His hands caress your sides and slide down to your hips, helping you move them in a small circle.

You can’t help but giggle. There is absolutely no need for all of this considering he’s teaching you how to dance for his sister’s wedding. You take a quick step forward, narrowly missing Rudy’s hands as they try to keep you pressed against him.

“Rudy,” you whine, “focus. You have to teach me how to dance for a family event. Not for you.”

You place your hands on your hips and try to give him a stern look but fail, immediately melting into his arms the moment he wraps them around you.

“I forgot,” Rudy croons, “you distract me too much.”

You link your fingers behind his neck whisper out oh sure, you forgot. He places his hands on your hips as a new song starts and slowly moves them from side to side.

He rubs the tip of his nose on yours before tilting his head to the side to press a soft kiss on your lips. You sink your fingers in his hair as he presses your hips to his hard bulge.

“Rudy,” you whisper on his mouth, “focus.”

He laughs, “I am, mi amor.” [my love]

For the next few songs he keeps a respectable distance and teaches you a few moves. You’ve always been just okay at dancing, but Rudy and his family are on a whole other level.

It doesn’t matter if it's a simple family dinner, the moment the music begins—his family will start a party. His mom and sisters will always pull you to the dance floor and you love them too much to continue being a subpar dancer.

Plus, Rudy loves to dance. And he moves way too well for you to stay sitting down at parties.

Rudy immediately agreed to teach you how to dance. Not because he thinks you need help–he always makes you feel confident whenever you dance together–but because it's just another chance for him to touch and keep you close.

“Doing so good, mi vida,” Rudy says as you immediately match the tempo to the next song. [my life]

Rudy smiles with genuine happiness as he watches you dance. His eyes are soft and half-lidded, his hands gentle while they guide you.

You press closer to Rudy as the music changes to something slower. The beat vibrates you to the core, causing goosebumps to erupt on your skin.

You turn around and press right against his cock, grabbing his hands and placing them on your hips. He slides a hand to your lower belly and grinds his cock on your ass.

By the end of the next song, his head is between your thighs and your whimpers are louder than the music. His fingers plunge into you with harsh strokes, stretching you for his cock.

Rudy drags you down to the floor before you can cum and plunges his cock in your creamy pussy. He folds you almost in half, fucking into you while he presses his mouth to yours in a sloppy kiss.

“More, more, more,” you chant, close to tears.

“Nena,” Rudy groans, “you love how I fuck you? Love how I make you all mine?”

A choked yes falls from your lips but you take each plunge, feeling his tip bump the end of you. One of his hands grips your thigh to spread you open while the other is placed on the floor by your head.

It becomes harder to breath, your head becoming dizzy with each slide of his hips. It’s intense, a little rough given how much you teased each other while dancing. He’s big, stretching you to your limit. But you can take it, you always do.

“Should I finish inside of you, mi amor? Paint this little cunt with my cum?”

Your pussy grips and flutters around his thick length at his words. You manage to mumble out yes, please Rudy, please before dragging a hand down to rub at your swollen clit.

The orgasm hits you with full force the moment your fingers circle your button. Your body pulls tight and your eyes shudder close from the force of his thrusts.

You barely manage to hear him praise you, come for me, nena–milk my cock, just like that. Rudy groans in a mixture of pain and pleasure and immediately comes, fucking you in sloppy thrusts.

Warm cum fills your pussy as you twist and moan underneath him. He grinds his hips into you, making sure that not a single drop of cum escapes your cunt.

Rudy falls next to you in a sweaty heap. Your body shakes in little aftershocks as Rudy drags you closer to him.

“I think,” he whispers after a few minutes, “I think you’re a great dancer.”

You let out a laugh and turn your head to press a kiss onto his cheek.

#rodolfo “rudy” parra x reader #rudy parra x female reader #rudy parra smut #cod x reader #cod mw2 x female reader #rudy parra #cod mw2 smut #shadowlali

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melodymunson · 3 days

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Eddie Munson x fem!goth cheerleader reader part 2 of 2

7.9K words.

This chapter involves the upside-down. Slight angst with a happy ending. You and Eddie have some smutty fun at a Corroded Coffin show backstage and after the prom.

Warnings: nsfw. Vaginal fingering, 69, blowjob, eating pussy, and p in v sex.

read part 1 here

ao3 link for series can be found here

The week passed relatively quickly, with phone calls to Eddie every night and three outdoor lunches together that week. You were even passing notes in class to each other. Once the weekend arrived, you got all dressed up in your best combat boots, a black spandex skirt with fishnets underneath, a Corroded Coffin tee shirt he had gifted you, and spiked black jewelry including chokers, earrings, and bracelets to complete your outfit and the total look. After getting ready and applying black eyeshadow and lipstick, you took one final look in the mirror, grabbed your wallet and small clutch purse, then made your way to your car and drove to the hideout. When you arrived, you noticed some familiar faces including Robin, Steve, and some friends of Eddies were there as well, even though you weren't sure of their names just yet.

The opening band was just finishing up and Corroded Coffin would be on next. It was so exciting to be there. You bought your favorite soda from the bar and went to get in front of the stage to wait for Eddie and his band to start their set. Steve and Robin both nodded and waved at you when they noticed you were there, too, and smiled. You waved back. They felt more comfortable near the sound booth and you were glad to be there front row and center. A decent crowd had already gathered. Soon the lights went down and you, as well as everyone else in the club, clapped as Corroded Coffin took the stage.

The first song was a Metallica cover of Master of Puppets followed by some other covers like the Judas Priest song Painkiller and WASP's Animal. There were some original songs after that. You clapped and screamed louder than practically anyone else and Eddie looked at you, making eye contact with every song. It was so nice to have the chance to live in the moment like this and experience this incredible show. Eddie had so much stage energy and he was such a confident and talented frontman. Song after song you got even more into the show by head-banging and throwing up the devil horns. He thought you looked stunning and knew he didn't want anyone else to have you but him. His guitar solos were epic and the drum solos, and you were having the time of your life. When the show was over, he handed you his guitar pick and invited you backstage.

Once in the backroom, he locked the door for some privacy and gave you a water bottle. It was so refreshing and what you needed. You were both sweaty, but he smelled faintly of cologne. It wasn't too strong, but it was nice. Being backstage was a whole new experience and the walls were covered with posters of various bands from all genres, some record plaques, and some very tasteful art pieces. The couch you were sitting on together was leather and felt so comfortable.

"I loved the show. You were incredible," you enthused, which put a big smile on his face.

"Thanks. You looked so stunning. I loved seeing you front row. It means a lot to me."

"Being backstage is so great but of course I came. I wouldn't miss it for anything else in the world."

He leaned forward, meeting your lips in a kiss, not even minding that just a little of your black lipstick got on his lips. You got onto his lap kissing him even harder and exploring his body with your hands as you touched his soft curly brown locks. He caressed your lower back and hip, then moved his fingers down towards your fishnets. As his hands roamed underneath your skirt, it caused you to moan into his mouth.

"Let me know if I'm going too fast or if anything makes you uncomfortable."

"Touch me more Eddie. Down there. I'm so wet."

"You're so fuckin hot. You know that, right? I've been wanting this for a while now, but I've been holding back."

"Then promise me you won't hold back any longer."

Your lips crashed against his again, tasting him fully and he gasped into your mouth as you ripped your fishnets and moved his hand towards your panties, pulling them down so he could move his fingers inside. He did just that feeling, the heat coming from your naked core.

"Mmm, you feel so good. I love touching you."

"I love touching you too, Ed's," you mumbled against his lips as you moved against his fingers, he moved them inside of you and held onto his hair, tugging slightly, which elicited a very audible whimper from him. The way he touched you and looked at you made your heart beat even faster. As he gazed into your eyes, you felt closer than ever to him. It was almost as if you were one.

As his fingers worked expertly on your clit, your eyes were trained on his, Eddie's gaze not leaving yours as he added another finger getting you even wetter. The feeling of his big rings inside of you was so fuckin good. Touching you made him feel so alive, and he was enjoying every single second with you. You were the girl of his dreams, and he wanted this more than anything else in the world.

He couldn't stop thinking about you since the camping trip and he was feeling such a rush with you at that moment the high he got from pleasing you and being with you was even better than the feelings of euphoria he got once he took the stage with his band. No other woman had come anywhere, even near this close to making him feel like he did when he was with you. No one else compared to you and he wanted to please you at whatever cost.

As his fingers hit your g-spot, you felt like you wouldn't last much longer but wanted to relish this moment with him and make this last.

"Ever since that night and I heard your pretty moans, I haven't been able to get you off my mind," he admitted as he finger-fucked you with perfect precision.

"I heard you that night, too. It was s-so," you uttered, whimpering against his ear as his fingers continued to fuck you in that perfect spot, going even quicker now as he realized how flustered you were. "Hot and sexy," you finished telling him, as his fingers didn't waver with his speed or rhythm. Your moans grew more frequent and even louder as your orgasm was closely approaching.

"Oh yeah? So were you."

He crashed his lips against yours now as he got you even closer to reaching your high, desperately wanting to taste you on his lips and savor it. With several more thrusts, you cried out, "Eddie, I'm gonna c-c-cum."

"Cum all over my fingers. I want to see your face as you do. Look at me," he urged in a commanding tone as he lifted your chin so you were looking him directly in the face.

As you stared deeply into his eyes and his fingers worked you through your high, you made a mess of his fingers and dug your nails into his shoulders, wanting to leave a mark. He guided you through your release and made you feel as if you were the only girl in the world.

"Fuck! Fuck Eddie!" You groaned loudly as you rode out your high, his fingers still working their magic as you were coming down from your release and intense feelings of euphoria. As you finally caught your breath again, he tasted his fingers, loving your taste.

"So fuckin good."

You kissed him again, wanting to taste yourself, and did so greedily. Many more kisses followed this and resting against his shoulder as you listened to his heartbeat. What they said about guitar players having the best hands was true and he gave you the most intense orgasm of your life. With him, you felt invincible, and he was amazing in every way.

A little later, he walked you to your car and paused for a moment, lingering there, before he said his goodbyes.

"Will you be my girlfriend?"

"Yes, of course." I want to so much."

You gave him another kiss and a hug, then parted ways, promising to call him soon. The town outcast was finally happy- really and truly. He felt like he was on top of the world because he had you. Everything about you made him happy. Dating him would probably tarnish your reputation, but you could not care less, and going public as a couple was something you wanted when the time was right.

You were on a high all weekend from the concert and it was just so amazing to finally see your man play live and be there to experience what was pretty much the best concert of your life so far. With Eddie, you felt invincible and nothing could stop you from smiling or feeling like you were on top of the world. When Eddie invited you to play Dungeons and Dragons with him and his friends you were so happy and gratefully accepted his offer. Meeting Dustin, Garrett, and Eddie's other friends went well, and the game was even more fun than you expected it to be. The next few weeks passed by so quickly but it was nice to spend so much time with him. At school, you would hold hands with him walking down the hall in between classes. Some people would stare but you ignored them all. As far as you were concerned once you graduated you would never see any of them again. People could be so cruel. The only thing that kept you on the cheerleading squad was being able to have a full-time scholarship to the university of your choosing. You had science and math together and even helped tutor him when he needed it. This time he was determined to finally pass and graduate. Most nights you would be on the phone with him talking about anything and everything and listening to music together.

The Friday before spring break you had to cheer at the big homecoming game and Eddie and his friends played DND. You wanted so badly to join them but you couldn't ditch a game. That weekend you had a road trip planned with your cousin and best friend which started early on Saturday. Once the game was over and you left the school's campus you saw him again- one last time before your trip but parted ways promising him you would get home safe. Little did you know that after that night things would change. You finished packing when you got home and waited for him to call which he promised he would around 11. Well, 11 came and went with still no call from him. It was weird. Maybe he had gotten stoned and passed out or got caught up with a customer. Midnight passed and you called him with no answer. Not being able to have a good night phone call with him hurt a little but honestly, it was probably nothing you tried to convince yourself. There was still a nagging feeling of dread that washed over you. Despite trying to tell yourself it was nothing, you decided to go to bed but in the morning you would stop by his place before your trip to say goodbye to him. Morning came eventually and even though you hadn't slept that well you got up looking forward to seeing him. Before you picked up your best friend, you drove over to his place, and to your horror, you saw his trailer was surrounded by caution tape and police were investigating the scene of a crime. Getting out of your car in a hurry you walked up to Eddie's uncle and asked him what happened. Eddie was missing and a person of interest in the death of Chrissy Cunningham. Your mouth opened in shock and you did your best to collect yourself and remain composed as you walked away even though your legs felt like jelly. When you made it to the safety of your car you nearly had a panic attack wondering what had gone down the night before. He hadn't mentioned a drug deal with Chrissy and now he was missing and she was dead. Left alone completely baffled and shocked you wondered what to do next. Soon you pealed out of there thinking of where Eddie could be but decided to go stop by Dustin's place to talk to him first as you collected your thoughts and tried your best to not completely freak out. Your trip was going to have to be postponed.

That afternoon you went over to Dustin's and he opened the door almost immediately with a look of concern on his face.

"Do you have any idea where Eddie is?" You asked your eyes completely red by now from the crying you did earlier.

Dustin looked very worried and was feeling a mixture of regret and shock at the events that had just unfolded on the news.

"It was Eddie they were talking about on the news. They didn't mention his name but it was him. They found Chrissy's body."

"I know I stopped by his place earlier and Wayne told me. Where would he be though?"

"He mentioned a guy named Reefer Rick before. I don't know where he lives though."

"Well, let's go find out."

You gestured for him to follow you to your car and drove to Family Video and soon were greeted by Robin and Steve.

"Hey, are you okay? Seriously you are shaking," Robin said as she pulled you in for a hug. You didn't know her very well yet but her embrace was comforting.

"I'll be okay once we find Eddie. Look for Rick's in your database of video rentals. He was a regular client of his."

"Of course, we can find that out for you," Steve added with a weak smile.

Robin and Steve wasted no time looking up Rick in the store's database inventory. There were multiple guys named Rick of course but once you found the list of stoner rentals you knew you had found the right guy. Steve wrote down the address and everyone made their way out the door and locked up the store.

"I hope he's here. I need to see him. We need to find out what the hell happened," you told Dustin as you clenched the steering wheel with a tight grip making your knuckles turn white.

"He didn't do this. On the news, they mentioned the body was mangled and it wasn't possible an actual person did this."

"I don't think he murdered her either. I haven't known him that long but he wouldn't do what they were describing. It has to be supernatural."

Soon you made it to Rick's and rang the bell. After some knocking and more rings, no one answered and you all made your way to the small shed in the back. Steve grabbed a paddle and started to poke the tarps surrounding the boats. Everyone called out Eddie's name and Eddie burst out of the tarp against the far wall and cornered Steve who was invading his personal space.

"I don't want to have a problem with you Harrison."

"Eddie! No! It's me, Dustin, your friend. This is Robin from the band and Steve who is a good guy. Eddie, don't do this," Dustin pleaded with him. Eddie loosened his grip on Steve once he noticed you were there with tears practically forming in your eyes. He made his way towards you and embraced you in a big hug. You held him trying your best to hold back your tears of relief.

"I didn't do it. It was Vecna. It was his curse. We were just making a quick deal I swear. I went to go looking for something stronger like she wanted. When I saw her body I ran. It's because I always run. I never face my problems and I just end up ignoring them until they get worse."

You tried your best to comfort him by running your fingers through his curly locks of hair and hushing him wanting to calm him down because he was getting so worked up. He couldn't stay here forever but for now, that's what needed to be done. It wasn't safe for him anywhere else at the moment and you planned on visiting him when you could.

"Your uncle misses you, Eddie. I missed you. I need you. We will figure this out babe I promise," you told him sincerely as you gave his arm a reassuring squeeze. He mustered the best smile he possibly could as you tried your best to comfort him and offer him some sort of relief.

"I know. I'm sorry I didn't contact you and that I just ran off and hid. That's what I do best. Jason can't find me or Sam or any of the others."

"They won't. We will do our best to make sure that doesn't happen. We have snacks and food for you. I just don't think it's safe right now for you to leave or wander off," you told him as he nodded his head in understanding.

"We will come back when we need to bring you food and company of course and we will communicate through these walkie-talkies," Dustin told him as he handed him the bag of food as well as one of the walkies.

He took it gratefully from Dustin and sat down. He felt defeated and knew that when he was caught and knew he probably would be soon. Having you around made this hiding out at least a bit bearable. The gang hung around for some time longer exchanging small talk and Dustin hugged Eddie before parting ways. You decided to stay for a while though.

"Look Eddie I know that you are upset and things are so fucked up right now. I'm here for you I just wanted you to know."

"Thanks, baby. I need you. I am glad you are on my side at least."

You held each other and talked for a while with some moments of silence. It felt so right to be there in his arms. You drifted off and eventually, it was morning again.

"I should go. I don't want to go but I need to," you told him forlornly.

"It's fine. I'm glad you came at all. I don't want to put you in any danger trust me it's the last thing I want."

You kissed and hugged him goodbye then walked back home.

Days passed and you visited Eddie every chance you got. The gang went to visit Henry Creel's former home and you stayed with Eddie. Jason and his minions including much to your dismay your ex, Sam, showed up looking for him at Rick's. Once they found his hiding spot after some time, Eddie made you promise to stay hidden in the boat house. As he lured them away, he got in a boat and rowed out as far as he could before they followed his trail. You watched from the windows seeing Eddie being chased after by Patrick and Jason. They swam quickly after him but things went wrong. Patrick was levitating and to your horror, he became mangled and practically ripped apart. It had to be the curse of Vecna. Chrissy was found by Eddie in a very similar manner. It was appalling to see and you were horrified. Next thing you knew Eddie was holding you in his arms. You comforted each other and went to Skull Rock to spend the night. Eventually, the others joined you both there.

After some talking, everyone decided that it was finally time to go to the other side. Even though Max, Lucas, and Dustin tagged along, you left them behind at the docks as you got onto the boat with Eddie, Nancy, Steve, and Robin. It was nightfall and once you had gotten to the middle of the lake, Steve went in first then Robin and Nancy. Finally, you and Eddie agreed to go together and once you reached the other side even more darkness enveloped all of you. No longer were the stars or moon in the sky it was instead replaced by a creepy and sinister lair. The gang felt more despair with each passing minute. The deeper you walked into the upside-down forest, the more tendrils of vines you found. Carefully avoiding them with each step, you and the rest safely crossed the precipice that led to the Demobats. Eddie vowed to keep you safe no matter what. With your oars in tow, you slowly approached the center of the Demobat's lair and waited as you listened to the thunder rumbling in the distance and the lightning that struck the area. The red flashing lights mixed with the thunder and screeching of the oncoming monsters, were enough to make you want to run but you stood your ground firmly. The bats grew closer and even closer but Steve and Eddie had your back. They took them down with all they had standing their ground and hitting them with all of their might. More and more came however and much to your dismay you felt the impending sense of doom as they were taken only to be replaced by even bigger ones. Both Eddie and especially Steve suffered bruising and damage in the process but they were defeated- for now.

Once you rode the bikes through the upside down to the point of almost escaping this other world and into Eddie's trailer, you heard Dustin speaking. He couldn't hear any of you at first. Eddie suggested SOS communication and it worked. Lucas and Max brought Eddie's mattress over the portal entrance and you climbed up right after Robin followed by Eddie. Nancy attempted to cross next but she was overtaken by Vecna. Steve yelled at her to wake up but it was of no use for a while until finally she awoke again and came out of her trance. When everyone was safe on the other side, at last, you asked Nancy what happened. She went into the story of Henry Creel and how she saw his early life up until he became Vacna when he was cast out from Hawkins Lab after a deadly massacre of its young patients. All the elements of her story were horror-filled and you couldn't imagine being stuck like her inside the upside and having your mind controlled by the evilest villain of them all.

The battle with Vecna

Being back inside upside down was frightening, to say the least, because if you lost then it would all be over, and coming to terms with uncertain death was difficult to grasp. Even though Eddie vowed to protect you at all costs you feared something would go wrong. After parting ways with Max, Lucas, Steve, Nancy, and Robin, you made your journey with Dustin and Eddie to the version of his place inside upside down. His guitar was there intact and he got it ready to play the most metal song in the history of the world live. He dedicated the song to Chrissy and started right away with the sickest guitar riffs and the best solo ever. Soon the bats were summoned and you heard them from afar. With your weapons and shields intact you led the bats straight toward the area and quickly made it away from the demo bats for temporary relief and shelter. Dustin went back over to the other side first followed by you. Much to your dismay, Eddie stayed behind and despite Dustin's cries and your begging for him to stay, he left to fight off the bats alone. Right away you and Dustin grabbed a chair to make it back over the threshold to rescue Eddie. The bats came for Eddie at full force only minutes later and as you and Dustin made your way back to Eddie, the demo bats came at him in full force. As he shielded them off the best he could with his spear, you lit a torch and used it to kill off as many as you could as Dustin used his dagger to spear them. They were after Eddie and he put up the best fight he could as they attacked him. With every swing, he fought back harder and as all three of you used your shields, they began to drop dead one at a time. No one would leave that night without injury and even though he suffered the most of all with his cuts, bruises, abrasions, and injuries, you were hurt and in pain. Despite getting hurt himself, Dustin remained strong and helped you fight off the rest of them as Eddie collapsed. Meanwhile, Nancy and Steve faced Vecna with Robin lighting the torch and throwing it at him. Eleven's powers and Max's distracting Vecna combined with the burning fiery flame, and the monster crumbled into ashes and the remaining demo bats all collapsed dead. Eddie's badly injured body lay there and tears rolled down your cheeks as well as Dustin's as you comforted him. He barely had a pulse but he was holding on as you told him you were there for him and nursed the bad wounds on his arms and leg with a tourniquet made from the sleeves of your shirt. An earthquake began and you held on tight to him as Dustin stayed close to you both. The vibrations and ground moving were strong but all of you persevered. Even though he was barely conscious he was able to get up with the help of you and Dustin. It was decided that it would be best to wait a while before trying to get Eddie back to the other side. Once inside his trailer, you lay there for a while trying to use whatever you could find in the trailer to revive him and nurse his wounds as well as your own and Dustin's. Some of Eddie's wounds required cauterization and you knew basic first aid and medical care so you administered the treatment. Though in some pain, he was able to bite down hard on leather and make it through the pain. Sometime later Dustin crossed the threshold and Eddie was brought over next you helped him up and he landed safely on the other side. He was still too weak to speak but you could tell he was grateful for you and Dustin helping to save his life. Eventually, you all arrived back at the safety of Hawkins. Soon you heard on the news Jason and Sam after their encounter with Lucas over Max levitating, perished in the earthquake. Relief flooded over you knowing they were gone.

-Aftermath

The hospital wasn't a safe place for Eddie and it was tragic to see him so hurt by the Demobats. He had to keep a low profile until he was no longer on the FBI's most wanted list. Vecna seemed to be defeated. You had to get him to safety so once Steve and Dustin brought him back from Vecna's lair, you called your cousin who was majoring in nursing and she promised to help out. Soon Eddie was taken to her place and had a grueling but successful recovery. Max got better too and regained her sight and vision. When you first found Eddie he was bloody, bruised, and very sore. A few months later he was doing so much better. Sometime later thanks to the testimonies from Steve, Dustin, Max, and Uncle Wayne they had given to the FBI and courts, he was not the FBI's most wanted any longer and they weren't seeking arrest at the moment. They had determined there wasn't enough proof for now but he was still a person of interest. There were also no more murders in Hawkins at least not ones gruesome or anything like what had happened to Chrissy and the others. You missed Chrissy every day and she was a friend of yours. You believed in Eddie from the start and never doubted him. Life without her was very different but with Eddie and your friends, you knew you'd make it through despite all odds.

You and Eddie had the perfect idea for how to dress for the prom with your friends a night before the real school prom. Since Eddie couldn't show up at the school and go with everything he had been going through, you decided it would be best along with your friends that you could have your prom at Steve's place. The party was to be exclusive and have Eddie's Hellfire club friends, Nancy, Robin, and Robin's date and crush Vickie, and Steve. Your relationship was heavy metal so why not represent that with your outfits? The night of prom you dressed up in a Guns N Roses tee that had gemstones on it but it was a flared tank top paired with your best pair of black platform boots, black tights, and a leather skirt. Eddie picked you up in his van and took you to Steve's place. His parents were never home so it was the best place to have it. When you saw him at your door, he was wearing an Ozzy Osbourne shirt and a nice pair of black pants. Of course, he told you how beautiful you looked as he put your corsage on your wrist. The black rose corsage he got you matched your outfit. As usual, he thought you looked stunning. No other girl compared to you and in his eyes, you were the most beautiful woman ever.

Everyone was having a great time and it was so friendly and welcoming. The real prom was something that didn't matter to you anymore because anywhere Eddie wasn't accepted you didn't want to be there. It would suck enough to not have him at graduation with you but it was going to be an amazing night. There were great snacks, plenty to drink, and even celebratory champagne. Defeating Vecna and Eddie's recovery took so much out of everyone and celebrating was much needed. Plenty of heavy metal was played and you stayed by Eddie's side all night with some dancing and kissing. You decided to leave early and Eddie was in agreement with you as you both said goodbye to your friends then headed out to his van and blared some Dio as you rode back to your place. You had the best night ahead planned for you and Eddie.

Post-prom

It had been a long journey with Eddie and now that you were alone with him at your house and in your bedroom, you had rose petals scattered all over your room and petals forming a big heart on your bed. It was so romantic to be there with him. You lit candles to set the mood and put in a cassette of Black Sabbath to play softly in the background. There was no question about it you loved Eddie completely and truly and no one and nothing could take those feelings away from you. As you removed your dress in front of him and bared yourself completely to him, he watched your every move with a glint in his eyes. He was very much enjoying the sight of you becoming naked right in front of him. As you undressed he removed his shirt and belt. Nearby your cheerleading uniform was just lying there which gave you an idea. You put it on for him. First the very short skirt and then the top. With curiosity-filled eyes, Eddie watched as you got dressed.

"Wow, that looks so hot on you. I always thought you looked sexy in that uniform but with no panties or bra. That's the hottest thing that I've ever seen in my entire life."

You blushed upon hearing him say this and went over to the bed getting on top of him and kissing him. Softly at first and then with passion. He felt so good and you loved these intimate moments you shared with him. His hands moved towards your waist and then over your ass and squeezed which elicited some giggles from you.

"Reach lower, Eddie," you instructed him playfully and he moved his hands to your bare ass and aching, needy pussy. He groaned in contentment as his hands moved over your body exploring it. You felt like the luckiest girl alive and you wanted to give it all to him tonight. It was the most perfect time to make love to him and to show him just how much you cared about him and truly loved him.

"I want to suck your cock," you seductively whispered as you began to kiss his neck and collarbone, then lower peppering kisses on his chest and stomach. There were still light bruises on his skin and you kissed them to show you loved him despite his injuries. Everything about him and his body was beautiful to you.

"Fuck. I needed that."

You begin to move his pants down unzipping them and removing them completely as well as his boxers. As his erection sprung free, you admired his length and girth with your mouth agape wanting more than anything to finally taste him.

"So big Eddie. So big for me."

"Let me taste you though."

You maneuvered yourself so that your pussy was on his face already glistening with precum. As you worked his cock in your hands, running your fingers over his shaft, he got even bigger for you and your mouth was salivating now in anticipation of taking him inside of your mouth. As you licked a thin stripe over his cockhead and shaft, you cradled his balls and he began to lick your clit, moving his tongue over your slit and parting your folds with his fingers. Little did you know he had wanted to taste you and do this for such a long time. There was so much self-control he had practiced in anticipation for this very moment. The sounds of licking and other wet, lewd noises could be heard as you worked his cock in your mouth and he sucked on your clit and fingered your wetness.

The way Eddie made you feel was incredible and you were so wet because of him. His cock hardened with your touch as you gathered his precum with your fingers and cupped his balls squeezing them gently.

"You taste so fuckin' good, Y/N," he groaned as you licked and sucked on his cock and began to take him even deeper inside your mouth.

It was more than lust at this point- so much more. Having him there with you like this and showing just how much you needed him, and wanted him was beyond just the physical aspects of it. He was so tender and passionate and you did your best to please him as best as you knew how. Soon you came close to taking him fully inside of your mouth. As his tongue tangled in your wet folds he fingered you and groaned. What he craved were the wet sounds your pussy was making as your juices coated his fingers and he loved to hear your beautiful moans. It wasn't much longer before he felt a bit close to his release but he wouldn't let that happen yet- not until he was inside of you.

"Baby stop. Please. Can't take it any longer. I need to be inside of you," he whined as you stroked his shaft now replacing your tongue with your hand.

"I want to feel you inside me too."

"I didn't bring any condoms. Fuck," he growled lowly as he pressed his hands to his forehead in frustration.

"Eddie, please don't ruin the moment. It's fine. I just started going on birth control and I'm clean. I know you are too. I always used protection in the past," you assured him.

"Really? I've always used protection before too. Well, it was only other one person but.." You changed your position so you were facing him and met his lips in a kiss cutting him off instantly.

"Just make love to me already, Eddie."

He greedily pulled you in for more sloppy kisses as you straddled his leg. You pulled away just to remove your shirt and toss aside your skirt as well before positioning yourself onto his thick cock. As you moved down fully on him, he held onto your waist and began to rut his hips up pushing into your slick heat. It felt so fuckin' good to be as one with you like this. Sealing his lips in another kiss you began to move slowly on his cock and ran your hands through his beautiful locks of hair as he firmly moved you on his cock and bucked up inside of you.

"I love your body. I love this so much," you mewled against his lips as his deep thrusts made you feel so fuckin' good and you craved him more than ever.

"I love it all. I love everything about you, my beautiful girl," he solemnly swore as he looked deeply into your eyes.

Your pretty moans turned him on as your body moved with his and listening to his groans that were just for you was one of the hottest things ever. The way he made you feel and vice-versa was comparable to no other and at that moment more than ever you wished you had waited to lose your virginity to him. Nothing could change that now but this time it felt so important and special and no matter what happened next with him you knew you would cherish this time with him forever. The way he made you feel and how tender, loving, and caring he was with you as you touched each other and he caressed your face- made you feel like you were truly the most beautiful girl. No doubt about it he was the one for you. There was so much affection between the two of you and he gave you so many kisses. It was so passionate and it felt like true love.

The way he moved inside of you was tender and just the perfect pace. He fit inside of you so perfectly and he was the best lover you could ever ask for. You loved him so much and hearing his gasps and groans was the biggest turn-on and only caused you to moan louder for him.

"Baby, I'm getting so close are you?" He asked sincerely as he looked up into your beautiful eyes with his gorgeous brown ones.

"Yes. So close," you groaned as you kept your pace steady on top of him and held onto his shoulders as your bodies moved together in sync as one.

Eddie felt like you were the most amazing girl he had ever met and was so mesmerized by your beauty and your stunning features but most of all he thought you had a good heart and he was attracted to your personality best of all and loved it more than anything else about you. You made him feel so alive and he felt like he belonged with you. You would never give up on him and couldn't imagine being with anyone else or seeing him with anyone else. He felt the same way.

As his hands moved from your waist to your breasts he tenderly cupped them and pinched your nipples which caused you to cry out his name and this elicited a huge smirk from him.

"Eddie I'm gonna cum," you protested as he hit your g-spot.

"Me too. Where do you want my cum?"

"Inside me," you moaned as he circled your clit with his fingers wanting to have you reach your orgasm first. You were practically thrown over the edge of ecstasy as he did this to you and only moments later you were cumming for him and crying out his name once again but even louder this time. Almost right after he came inside of you filling you up and grunting as he spilled his seed so deep. Slowly you got off him and laid down by his side once you had come down from your high and cleaned yourself up. Minutes passed and you held onto each other enjoying his company. Soon after that, the silence was broken by your confession.

"I love you, Eddie."

"I love you too Y/N. So much."

Graduation

You stood in your cap and gown as you faced the mirror. It was finally going to happen. You were going to move on away from high school but now you had the love of your life. Eddie was still shunned by the community, and of course, needed to be in an undisclosed location but you were so proud of him because of what he did to destroy Vecna. Most importantly you loved how he changed your life and became your best friend and boyfriend in the process. The valedictorian was Robin and you were so proud of her. After she gave her speech everyone stood and cheered her on. The graduates were ready and waited patiently for the diplomas to be handed out and as you waited for your name to be called you thought about the future and how no matter what you wanted Eddie to be a part of it. The names were called and once you were up at the podium you accepted your diploma with a smile on your face as you thought about Eddie and being with him again. Afterward, you wasted no time in going to your car and driving to see him. As much as you wanted to watch your other friends accept their diplomas you wanted alone time with your man most of all. Soon he would be moving to a new place with Wayne in Colorado near the mountains with some distant relatives and family to seek refuge away from this town that hated him and any further police scrutiny. College was so far away from him on the east coast but you knew your relationship would make it through. The only reason you would go to Georgetown was because of your scholarship and the good academic program. The next two months you spent all your time with Eddie and the summer passed quickly. Every day felt like a gift with him and you cherished it completely.

1 month later:

The search for the real killer was given up, once the gang including Eleven, Max, Robin, Steve, you, Eddie, Dustin, Nancy, Will, Mike, and Lucas went to the upside down again to defeat Vecna once and for all. Once Nancy and Eleven started having visions again everyone came together to return to the upside down. With more powerful weapons and ammunition this time, you manipulated him and brought him down forever. Even better Chrissy, Patrick, and the others were freed from the confines of the curse of Vecna and came back to life.

Epilogue- Christmas break

Finally, your first semester of college was over and you were eager to see Eddie in Colorado from DC and spend the holidays together. It was rough, especially at first being away so far from him as he stayed behind and recorded with his band then toured the country. While you were away at college Eddie's job and passion was designing guitars. He had also been working diligently on getting his GED and he finally did. When he called with the news you were ecstatic for him. You were so proud of Eddie and only wanted the very best for him and he felt the same way. While you were in DC he was watching Ozzy for you and you couldn't wait to be reunited with them both. Once you landed at the airport he greeted you with a flower bouquet and a big hug and kiss. It was now the time to show him the fresh tattoo you had recently gotten done. The tattoo in question was two black hearts and a flame with Eddie's name in one heart and your name in the other.

"I missed you so much, babe. I'm just so glad you are here with me now," he told you sincerely with excitement.

He got down on one knee and opened up a small box containing two rings with black hearts and some crystals surrounding the two hearts.

"They are promise rings. One for each of us. I love you Y/N."

You accepted the ring putting it on your ring finger and admiring the stones and their beauty in the light. He put on the other ring admiring it as he held it up next to yours.

"I love it and I love you too. I have a surprise. A tattoo. My first one." You lifted your shoulder to reveal the tattoo to him and he gasped in pleasant surprise as he saw it.

"I love it. It's amazing!" No one had ever gotten a tattoo for him before and he loved the surprise. Enveloping him in a hug, you held him tightly never wanting to let go of him. Pulling him in for another kiss your lips melted against his with a fiery passion. You never wanted this feeling to end.

"Eddie I'm transferring to Colorado after next semester and I want you to move in with me." You had planned on getting a nice apartment or condo and with your part-time job and internship, you were making good money.

"Yes. A million times yes. I want that more than anything."

He kissed and hugged you again then placed his arm around your shoulder as he walked with you out of the airport carrying your bags for you in his other hand.

"I can't imagine not being with you and apart any longer. Just 4 more months of this after the winter break," you happily mused as you walked with him to his van.

"When my new band finally tours I want you to come with us if you can. Arent there correspondence courses where you can mail your work in?"

"You are so smart. Yes, there is. I can do that. Long-distance learning. I'd like that a lot."

Once in his van, he started the engine letting it warm up. A light sprinkle of snow was already forming on the ground and snowflakes were gathering on his windshield. It was so nice to be in a place like Colorado. When you got back to Eddie's new place which was an apartment Steve and Robin jumped out yelling surprise as you entered his front door.

"A surprise party for me? This is so awesome! Thanks, baby!" You gave him a quick kiss before going to greet them all.

Eddie stayed watching from a slight distance feeling happy that you were so happy. He had baked a cake, especially for you, and your favorite movies were rented on VHS along with so much food. Being there was all you needed and you were feeling so content with life at that moment. A year from now you weren't sure what your life would be like but you just hoped that Eddie would still be a part of it. He had no intention of letting you go and he would be there for the long haul. The party was amazing of course and the whole break. Who knows maybe a year from now or 2 years even 5 you would be Mrs. Munson. For now, you were living life with the best friends a girl could ever ask for and the man of your dreams- former freak/Banished now the love of your life Eddie Munson.

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pockettwinzz · 3 days

Text

My Heaven - S.JY

୨୧ Warnings ୨୧ : Fluff, Angst, Toxic parents, Kissing, SFW, not proofread

୨୧ A/N ୨୧ : wrote this in a haste cause i really wanted to release smth for the weekend so I apologize if it's bad :3. Also enhypen's releasing a new version of dark moon ><

୨୧ Word count ୨୧ : 1.7k

As you sat in your new college classroom, your mind drifted away from the mundane lecture on ancient history. You couldn't help but wonder how the rest of your college experience would turn out. With your perfect 4.0 GPA from high school, you had been accepted into one of the most prestigious universities in the country. However, even though you had been top of your class and had received countless awards and accolades, it seemed that your parents were never truly happy with you. They constantly pressured you to study even harder and to strive for even greater heights.

Meanwhile, Jake, who had coasted through high school with mediocre grades and minimal effort, had been welcomed into this new university with open arms. Everyone seemed to love him, and he was constantly surrounded by a group of friends. You couldn't help but feel a twinge of envy as you watched him laugh and joke with them during the break.

As the semester progressed, you found yourself struggling to keep up with the workload. Your classes were more challenging than you had anticipated, and the constant pressure from your parents only made matters worse. You often found yourself staying up late into the night, hunched over your books, tears streaming down your face as you tried to understand the complex concepts and theories.

Life wasn't going how you wanted it too and seeing others, mostly Jake, sucked up to the professors, get high grades without much effort made you feel even worse. You didn't understand why your parents always thought you were useless. You tried to talk to them about it, to tell them that you were doing your best, but they never listened. They just kept pushing you harder, telling you that you could do better. You started to lose hope, to feel like you were drowning in a sea of academic expectations.

You never knew when it happened, maybe when Jake stole the first position, or maybe when he scored more marks from you on that one chemistry practical, but it was safe to say you hate him. You hated him for being so perfect, for being so loved, for being able to do everything effortlessly while you had to work your ass off to get even a B. You hated him for making your life miserable, for making you feel like you were never good enough, for making you feel like you were nothing but a burden to your parents.

One day, after yet another grueling exam, you decided that you'd had enough. You couldn't take it anymore. You walked up to Jake in the hallway, your hands shaking with anger and frustration. "Why do you get everything so easy?" you demanded, your voice quivering with emotion. "Why does everyone love you and hate me?"

Jake looked taken aback by your outburst, his perfect features twisting into a frown. "What?".

"Why does it always have to be like this?" you cried, your voice cracking. "Why does everyone always love you and hate me? I just want to be normal, just once!" You felt like you were about to burst, like all of the anger and frustration you'd been feeling for so long was building up inside of you, ready to explode. You didn't know why you were telling Jake any of this, but you couldn't help it. You needed someone to understand.

Jake hesitated for a moment, seeming unsure of how to respond. Finally, he took a step closer to you and placed a hand on your shoulder. "Look, I get it," he said softly. "It's hard sometimes, trying to live up to everyone's expectations. But you know what? You're amazing. You're smart, and talented, and you've got so much to offer. You just need to believe in yourself, okay?"

"Shut up" you snapped, shrugging his hand off your shoulder. "You don't understand anything. You've never had to struggle, never had to fight for anything." You turned away from him, anger and hurt burning in your chest. "Stop pretending to be so nice. I hate it, I hate you"

Jake let out a sigh, looking genuinely hurt. "I'm sorry if I've ever done anything to make you feel that way," he said quietly.

You turned back to him, tears streaming down your face. "It's not just you," you sobbed. "It's everyone. I'm just so tired of feeling like I'm never good enough. I'm tired of feeling like a burden." Jake's expression softened, and he reached out to wipe away a tear from your cheek.

"You're not a burden," he said gently. "And you are good enough. You're more than good enough. You just need to remember that." He hesitated for a moment, then took a deep breath. "And you know what? If it means that much to you, I'll help you. I'll help you get through this."

You looked up at him, surprised by his offer. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, if you want me to help you, I will. I'll study with you, or whatever you need. We can work together to get through this," Jake explained, his voice firm but gentle. "Because you're right, it's not fair. You are good enough, and you deserve to be happy. You deserve to have people believe in you."

You felt a strange sensation in your chest, like a warmth spreading through you. You didn't quite understand it, but it was nice. It was nice to feel like someone actually cared. "Really?" you asked, looking up at him. "You'd really help me?"

Jake nodded, his expression sincere. "Yeah, of course I would. We're friends, aren't we? Besides, it's not like I've got everything easy. I've just learned how to deal with it."

As tensions began to ease between you, Jake started to show you a different side of himself. He'd always been considerate and caring, but now those qualities seemed to shine brighter than ever before. He'd listen intently when you spoke, offering thoughtful advice and encouragement. He'd laugh at your jokes, even when they weren't funny, and he'd make an effort to include you in group activities. You began to feel a warmth in your chest whenever he was around.

One day, as you studied together in the library, you noticed Jake looking at you in a way that made your heart skip a beat. His eyes seemed to hold an intensity that you'd never seen before, and it made you feel both nervous and excited at the same time. As you spoke, he'd occasionally glance at you, a soft smile playing at the corners of his lips. It was then that you realized, with a start, that you were in love with him.

Over the next few weeks, your friendship blossomed into something deeper. The way Jake treated you, with respect and admiration, made you feel like the most special person in the world. You found yourself looking forward to spending time with him, just talking or watching a movie. The gentle way he touched your hand when he passed you a pen or the way he'd tease you about your favorite TV shows only served to intensify the feelings you had for him.

One evening, as you studied together in his room, the lights were low and the only sound was the soft rustling of pages. You were so engrossed in your work that you didn't even notice how close Jake was sitting to you. You were acutely aware of his presence, of the way his shoulder brushed against yours every time he reached for a pen or turned a page. The air between you seemed to crackle with an electricity that you couldn't quite explain.

As the night wore on, you found yourself glancing up at him more and more often, studying the lines of his face, the way his hair fell across his forehead, the way his lips moved as he spoke. You felt your heart race every time he looked at you, and you could swear that there was something different in his eyes. Something warm and intense.

You tried to concentrate on your work, but your mind kept wandering, drifting back to the way he'd been acting. You wondered if he felt the same way about you. You wondered what he would do if you confessed your feelings. A part of you was terrified of ruining your friendship, but another part of you longed for something more. Something deep and lasting. Something real.

"J-jake," you stammer, your voice barely audible over the thunder of your heart. "I-I love you." The words hang in the air between you, heavy and palpable, as if they've been weighing on your chest for far too long. You feel your face flush with embarrassment, but at the same time, there's a strange sense of relief in finally getting the words out.

Jake goes still, his eyes widening in surprise. He hesitates for a moment, searching your face, before exhaling softly and leaning in closer. His lips meet yours, tentatively at first, but with a growing intensity that takes your breath away. You can feel the heat of his body pressed against yours, his hands gently cupping your cheeks as he deepens the kiss.

The world around you fades away as you lose yourself in the sensation of being connected to him. His taste, his smell, the feel of his skin against yours—it's all so familiar and yet so new at the same time. You moan into the kiss, wrapping your arms around his neck, wanting more of him.

Jake responds eagerly, deepening the kiss even further. His tongue dances with yours, teasing and exploring, sending shivers down your spine. You can feel the passion building inside of you, a warmth spreading through your entire body. You never knew you could feel this way about someone, this alive, this desired.

As you break away from the kiss, your eyes meet his, and you see the love reflected there. It's a look of wonder and awe, as if he can't quite believe how lucky he is to be sharing this moment with you. He trails his fingers down your cheek, over your jawline, and to your lips again, this time softly tracing their outline.

"I love you too, Yn," he whispers. "I've loved you for a long time."

Your heart soars at his words, and you feel a newfound sense of joy and security wash over you. You realize that this is what you've always wanted, to be truly loved and cherished by someone as wonderful as Jake. You lean in and kiss him again, this time with more passion and longing, as if you could never get enough of his lips on yours.

༘˚⋆𐙚｡Permanent Taglist ༘˚⋆𐙚｡ @cha-eui @alvojake @heeslut4life @wondipity @dollywons @wonlvkay

{reply or send ask to be added Minors + blogs w/o ages DNI}

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since64bce · 2 days

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Hell Within Hell

Alastor-Radio Demon- x Sinner reader

Synopsis: Alastor has inhibited hell for years. He knows it's ins' and outs'. But when it comes to him, his coppery heart, and an unexpected new-found perspective on his assistant, a new hell is created for him as he tries to wrestle with the shiny new concept of love. Just a few short pieces of writing and some head cannons'. Nothin' fancy.

Word count: Don't know. Warnings: Alastor.

By gosh what a tragedy. What a wonderful, terrible tragedy. What a questionable, concerning tragedy. How lovely it is. How problematic. Did Shakespeare end up in hell for all the souls he stole in the theatre? I pray for him if that was ever the case. And not because his soul wandered into eternal damnation. Oh no, there's a fate much worse than that, and his name is Alastor.

When the heart becomes stale it also becomes a waste of space, a space that could be used for more lung capacity instead. Because of this reason, Alastor often had thoughts of compulsively ripping it right out, especially, strangely, and more so now that it was finally of use. If Shakespeare really was in hell, Alastor wanted to kill him. If he was a bug, he'd place the man beneath Nifty's blade. And if he was in Heaven- which would be unwarranted given all the hearts he's crushed- Alastor would find a way to drag him down into Hell to watch his tragic little heart suffer for eternity. Because it's his texts in which Alastor has stumbled upon. And it's from his texts in which Alastor has learnt about love and all it has to offer.

Alastor is a refrained lover, if you could call the demon a lover at all. At best he's okay at love, if thats what you wanted to call whatever the thing Alastor thinks "love" is.

Being an overlord, you'd think he was capable of anything.

Uhh lower your expectations sis.

Problem No.1 with Alastor (which was really hard to find) is that he's not really the lovey dovey type. Does he get passionate about certain things? Of course darling. But when was the last time it was about a lowly sinner like yourself? (Hear the crickets babe? Yea pretty much that).

However I feel like this is true only for a few years after he's met you.

I'd say it's a "You-fell-first-(but then lowkey realised it ain't never happening type thing so you stopped)-he-fell-harder-(and got confused so didn't pursue it for like six fuxking months)

Being an overlord you'd think he was capable of anything but in all honestly love confuses this sweet🍬, sweet🍭, neurotic👹 boy.

His heart is in tatters and moth eaten like some dusty old drape. Nobody's ever come into his life that mattered to him much before.

And when I say "mattered" it doesn't come under the "slightly useful to him but couldn't care less" umbrella either.

Like it's a genuine feeling of not wishing for somebody to just fucking up and leave his demonic little world.

It's as if you're just so convenient for him to be able to slot you into his crazy, batshit puzzle of a life. And you fit so perfectly and meticulously, and you make it look rather complete, that he just doesn't really feel he needs you gone.🙂🙃

And thats his very lopsided version of love that he hasn't created a full understanding around yet. But hopefully will... one day.💕

Why would someone like him like someone like you!?? 🤯😧

Oh please bitch Alastor in Alastor's world is a special, clever little princess, nobody can top him.

When he first laid eyes on you, you were just another darling sack of shit staying at the Hazbin sorry not sorry. (Boo me idc this is how your love story goes 😤)

You weren't special at all. In fact, to him you were just a normal bad sinner doing the normal bad sinner things. There was nothing alluring about you, there was not a single aura or attractive quirk or special little something on the inside nor the outside that made him love you. You were like a crusty little stray dog, period. Not even a cute one.

In fact not even your death story was cool you got like hit by a bus or something idfc but it was nothin striking babes

You weren't even that bad of a sinner tbh. You were just a lying cheating fu k that got hit by a bus before you could find Jesus and repent

Anyways then you have Radio Demon, Overlord, Mr.Alastor who can do funny shit with his shadows oh dear lord save me

So as I said before, you, my dear, had a little crush for him first. Or, more realistically, you caught the love bug. Because don't we all know how little Nifty loves her bugs (dead).

Yes, you hiccupped on your blushy, fluffy feelings because trying to find genuine love and care within Ali's cold little heart at the time would've been damn near impossible. Like being stuck in a maze within a maze within a stone wall that had no exit.

So, yes dear, a hard pill to swallow ik but you got there in the end .

Over the years following, you and Alastor became a nice little duo. Like an elegant doberman and it's small rat-dog companion (guess which ones which).

Everybody in the Hazbin hotel has their own little niche, whether it be porn-starring or bar tending.

Yours was running errands for Alastor.

In his eyes you were comparable to an assistant even though the title was never officially yours. And he didn't want it to be yours because the role of facilities manager was a one person job.

Besides you did other things than just hotel errands.

You were more like an assistant Alastor. And that suited the both of you just fine. To Alastor you were remarkably useful, to you Alastor was an interesting boss and a form of strange company you somehow enjoyed. His presence, albeit staticky, was charming. He was a hard one to shake off, that man.

And then he began noticing you. And not just in the general way. I mean thats how it all starts off doesn't it?

It starts with a moment.

His boring "normie" of a companion... charmed him in some way. He didn't know how.

It was after one of his avid radio broadcasts when he switched off the set and just sat there in the silent darkness illuminated by the controls. Not even his voice filled the air, which was a strange noise to behold. Oddly peaceful, huh.

And then it got him thinking about your voice and how it could come and disrupt his blissful, peaceful silence at any moment. Pestering him with something new, as the very un-special sound of it filled the room.

You did like to disrupt things.

You've had your fair share of moments you've disrupted.

With your normal voice.

Filling the room.

It got his cogs spinning as he thought about you so normal and dull and boring. But it seemed that he really did know quite a lot about you.

You were never a drug addict in the middle world, never any kind of addict, never any kind of slave to anything or anybody but the lies you told others. Admirable achievement in this crowd down here.

But still, what a boring Mary Sue.

Typical Mary Sue behaviour that you should also try and recover from your compulsive lying, and actually bother to make use of the facilities the Hazbin Hotel had to offer.

Charming. But petty.

Just today he had asked you about an errand you'd run, only to find out that you had lied about running it.

You were supposed to have given some bird food to the cuckoo in the cuckoo clock. It was a fools errand he had given you to make you go away for a second. But you had told him you had actually done it.

Until you admitted you lied.

Inside the broadcast tower, Alastor let out a quiet laugh. He didn't know why it was quiet, he was the only person in the tower, and even if he were with other people its not like he'd care.

But what was so funny?

He thought back to the conversation: "I don't know what you're talking about," you had told him. "I never fed the stupid clock." And then he said, "Oh dear, well thats quite contrary to what I was told before." And you said, "damnit" under your breath and walked away, annoyed at yourself for having broken your sobriety, going to go repent to Charlie for the fifth time that day.

Again, Al found himself smiling ever wider and trying to keep his steady flow of chuckles beneath his fingers. Soon he was hunched over, finding other stories about you drifting to his head.

Unbeknownst to him, the layer of ice on his heart was slowly beginning to melt in the section that he reserved for you.

He realised you were such a funny fickle little thing, he realised he was quite fond of you as his assistant. It made no sense. And after the laughter was over something else took over.

A sense of something between fiery anger and grief contaminated his pores. He realised he had let you into his heart. He tried to quickly freeze it over again, however, it was too late, it seemed you had already brushed its surface.

The next day when you two were busying yourselves with errands, you came across each other in a hallway.

There was something off about his face on this particular day. Because when you looked at his face which was watching over your face, you never found his signature smile. For once you saw his lips relaxed. For once you saw his elusive eyes really looking at you like nobodies ever looked at you before.

And then he walked right past like nothing happened. However something had happened. Something incredibly unexpected and wrong. Radio Demon, Overlord, Mr. Alastor had found someone who mattered.

Boring, normie, lacklustre, lukewarm, little. Old. You.

It's a quiet day at the Hazbin Hotel. But it's always a quiet day isn't it? Hell is rock bottom, and once you hit rock bottom, well, what's the point in not wandering around for a bit?

You were only here because Charlie picked you up before the Sinners mentality could reach you.

At the same time, you were also only here because of Alastor.

Alastor, the lean, lanky overlord which you couldn't help but like somewhat. Cold and calculating despite the warm colours he wore. charming and pleasant despite his scary appeal. He was one reason why you enjoyed your stay at the Hazbin Hotel.

But he was also one reason why you hated it.

Lately anyway.

You've tried to bring it up with him but he simply won't listen. He doesn't even laugh anymore he just grimaces. It's been two whole months since he last smiled at you and you feel as though your beginning to get withdrawals- as sappy as that sounds. But it's true. As funny as it is to say, hell seems less pleasant, and even the Hazbin, despite Miss Morningstar's lovely presence, is falling short of joy and dunking deeper into the gloomy reality that is damnation.

They say that reality is just your perception. However, why has your perception been so fragmented by just a absence of a single smile?

Oh but you knew didn't you? You still loved him.

You thought you were past it but you weren't. You're such a brilliant liar that you can even trick yourself into believing things that aren't true. How remarkable. How depressing.

Ugh.

He's probably finally gotten bored of you. In fact, you've probably bored him into some kind of chronic depression that triggers every time he see's your boring, depressing face. Double ugh. And now you can't stand to look in the mirror. Sometimes you lay awake at night wondering what you've done to him and if it's you that's broken his perfect smile or something else. But everything he does points at you, and with this ridiculous jacket of blame on your shoulders you don't know how to look in his eyes anymore without feeling humiliated.

Oh and now he's behind you, watching you sit beneath the stupid cuckoo clock with a pile of birdseed in your palm. Humiliating? No something worse than that. You must look ridiculous. Desperate. Ridiculously desperate.

'Well, I feel it's too late now don't you? That ridiculous lie is still a lie, also the bird isn't real if you didn't get the memo,' taunted the inevitably superficial voice of the radio host. You could feel him behind you but you couldn't see him. The mans presence was very strong, a quirk, perhaps, that came with being an overlord. Although at times you could hardly tell when he'd enter a room at all. 'Now, why are you sitting, staring at the wall like a dummy? Did dear Charlie put you in time out for being a liar?'

'Fuck you, Alastor,' you huffed, 'you know I'm working on it.'

'Not making much progress I see.'

You could hear his non-smile in his voice. You didn't even turn around, you didn't have to, plus, you didn't want to.

'After you're finished working out your lying problem, perhaps you should focus on your swearing problem,' he said. You could hear the ruffling of Al's suit as he presumably crouched down, and then the cold lick of his breath as he got close to your ear. 'It's not so classy, my dear, for someone like you to have such a foul mouth.'

'Fuck- I know- just fuck off!'

You heard Alastor tut behind you, sighing disapprovingly.

You turned and looked him in the eyes. They looked bemused, however, his mouth told you a different story. He looked slightly chilling without that smile of his. Perhaps that was another reason for your sleeping troubles lately. 'Go ahead and do it you creep, kill me, I know ya wanna,' you declared, he cocked his head to the side, terrifyingly interested in your proposition. You had to resist the urge to swallow. 'Also now I've seen you without a smile I think I've seen it all, kill me I'm ready.'

You were half joking, but you still watched Alastor out of the corner of your eye, a habit you had developed.

'No.'

'That's not like you, Alastor.'

'What can I say? I am a man of many surprises. And you're far too valuable to me to kill you, assistant.' He added the last part in slowly, watching you like a hawk.

And then you saw it.

The faintest glimmer of tooth.

The littlest crease beside his lip.

And did he just call you valuable? A compliment from Alastor? Kill me now, you thought, it wasn't gonna get much better than this. And then Alastor's distinct vocals piped up again, 'ha ha! You look dumbfounded, sweetheart. Is there something I can help you with?'

His smile disappeared. And so did that feeling of hope in your stomach, leaving you empty again, and so you said, 'what do you even want Alastor? why'd you come find me? You're just toying with me now.'

'I'm afraid I toy with everyone, assistant.'

You felt him watching you as you crossed the room and put the birdseed in the bin, you felt him watching you as you dusted off your hands and made your way to the door.

'Smile,' you ordered. One final attempt.

Once again he cocked his head, raising his eyebrows, no expression in the mouth and whatever expression was in the eyes seemed to be told in another language. 'And what do I get if I do that for you?'

'My smile.'

Alastor has been a mess lately.

A clean mess no doubt. But he's been walking around half naked for months, alas, he can't bring himself to smile, which was more like a piece for clothing for him now more than anything. It got to the point where the Radio Demon thought that it had finally lost it's sincerity and emotion. But clearly not, as it's absence has been due to nothing but sincerity and emotion, two things which Alastor had never really exercised. Two things which were out of his hands.

And it's been ever since he found you wandering the hellish plains of his mind.

Yes, he was the skeleton in the closet, the monster beneath the bed, the not-your-typical-spooky-guy. But maybe he's finally found a weakness, and that thought slapped his smile right off his face.

And his assistant was all to blame.

You were all to blame.

He found his hands shaking as he looked at you, he carefully analysed that angry look about you as you stood rigidly at the door. There was nothing threatening about you, your face wasn't scary like his was, however he found himself mildly irritated by your defiances' today, mildly saddened at your obvious depression, and mildly livid that he couldn't get you off his mind.

So no, he wasn't threatened, you just mildly made him want to pull his hair out.

'Smile.'

'And what do I get if I do that for you?'

'My smile.'

Your smile? And what was that supposed to mean? Was he supposed to rip your mouth off and take your smile for his own? He looked at you, he looked at your lips, imagined touching them, imagining slicing them off you as your blood spilled and you screamed. And then he found himself putting the thought down, finding that he didn't really want that thought. How strange. Your smile wouldn't suit his face anyway, it looks much sweeter on you.

'If you smile at me I'll smile at you back,' you clarified, still with that rather hostile look in your eyes. You didn't really look in the smiling mood darling.

But it gave Alastor pause for thought.

Oh. So that's what you meant. Interesting. An equal exchange.

Al brought the memory of your smile up in his mind. It was pleasant enough. Charming enough... Oh who was he kidding? Sometimes he wished you could tell him the lies he told himself so he'd believe them better.

Your smile. It was sweet and dainty and lovely, and there was not a night that had passed in which he hadn't thought about it in some fleeting way.

Squeezing, hurting, reaching. He wanted to rip his heart out right then and there as he looked at you glaring at him from the doorframe.

And that's when he walked right up to you without warning. You barely had time to back away. And he took in your wonderful face with all of your wonderful features, from the lovely curve of your nose, to the shape of your very skull, to the fat of your cheeks to the pigment of your skin (which had turned wonderfully rosy beneath his fingers).

And then he took in your smile.

And he realised he was smiling too.

And he was so angry with himself, and irritated at you for making him feel this way. And so he leaned in and carefully placed his lips onto the corner of your mouth. Wanting to do it again and again and again but worried that he could smudge away the perfection that was you.

In the end he just grinned at you.

...

And then walked away like nothing happened.

...

A/N- Ik the tiny one shot at the end is shit but it's like 1 am and I have school tomorrow, I've watched like 4 episodes and I don't even know who tf Lucifer is yet so don't even come at me bitchens 🖕🥷

#hazbin hotel #hazbin alastor #hazbin hotel alastor #alastor the radio demon #alastor x gn!reader #gender neutral reader #x reader #vivienne medrano #radio demon x you #radio demon x reader #hazbin hotel x you #hazbin hotel x reader #alastor oneshot #alastor headcanons #radio demon

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from-the-coffee-shop-in-edoras · 2 days

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This story started with Guthláf, Théoden’s banner bearer. To carry a flag in war was (in LOTR and real life) very dangerous, and it got me thinking about the kind of person who would willingly take on that danger and why (see here for Guthláf’s answer). And then I got thinking about what it would be like to love that kind of person and have to watch them do something so brave and glorious and selfless but also so perilous. And that brought me to Wídfara.

Like Guthláf, Wídfara exists in canon for just a few sentences. He’s from the Wold. He’s intuitive about the weather. That’s it from Tolkien. But I do so love an obscure horse boy of Rohan, and two together is even better. Here they are in part 1 of 7, where our boys have their first meeting.

August, T.A. 3017

When he’d taken a third wrong turn in as many tries, Wídfara finally decided to ask someone on the street for help. Unfortunately, getting anyone in Edoras to stop to answer his questions proved even harder than finding his own way around the city. It wasn’t that people were unfriendly or unwilling to assist, but rather that they didn’t seem to even notice him as he tentatively raised a hand or stammered out the beginnings of a greeting. Everyone walked so quickly and with such a busy sense of purpose that they were invariably four steps past him already by the time he got his first few words out.

A quick glance up at the sun told him that he was going to be late if he didn’t get himself together soon, and the last thing he wanted was to make a poor impression on his very first day. He already had enough working against him – his simple country clothing, his thick rural accent, his obvious cluelessness in navigating his way around, all of which marked him clearly as an outsider – and he didn’t need his new éored thinking that he was careless or unreliable on top of everything else. He shifted his pack on his back, hastened his steps around another corner and felt a wash of relief at the sight of a garrison complex with the king’s banner flying in front.

An older man, clad to the waist in armor and standing with a rigid military bearing, waited on the front steps of the central building, just under the banner. His eyes scanned all the passersby, and when they landed on Wídfara they lit up with a spark of intuited recognition. The rigidity melted away in an instant, and he beckoned Wídfara over with a smile and a welcoming wave.

“I’m on the lookout for a new rider just in from the East-mark, and I would bet my horse that you’re him. And right on time, too. My name is Elfhelm.”

Wídfara dropped his pack and stood to attention. For all that he didn’t know about Edoras, he certainly knew the name of Elfhelm, the commander of the garrison and the functional First Marshal of the Mark any time the king himself wasn’t present. “Yes, Marshal. I just arrived in the city last night. My name is Wídfara, sir.”

Elfhelm’s bushy eyebrows shot upward at the distinctive heavy twang of Wídfara’s words. “The Third Marshal told me he was sending us a real country boy, and I see that he wasn’t exaggerating. Where exactly are you from, son?”

Elfhelm’s open, casual manner took Wídfara by surprise. Back home, his captain had been a rather grim man, one who never spoke an unnecessary word or showed his riders even a hint of his own personality, and Wídfara had expected the leaders of Edoras, some of the most powerful in the kingdom, to be even more stern. But yet again, it seemed, he simply had no understanding of how life in the capital actually worked. “I’m born and raised in the Wold, Marshal,” he answered. “My family has run herds out there for generations. It’s quite…” He glanced around at the bustling rush of people moving in and out of the collection of buildings around them. “It’s different from the city.”

Elfhelm nodded with a sympathetic smile. “Well, that’s certainly true. I imagine that Edoras can seem a little overwhelming at first to someone who’s spent his whole life in a place like the Wold. And an éored reordering is never easy on anyone. Saying goodbye to the people and places you’ve always known is a rough task.”

Wídfara swallowed hard on the lump that immediately formed in his throat. It had been less than a week since he’d been forced to say those goodbyes, gathered together with family and friends and brothers-in-arms out near his old post in the plains where the Limlight joined the Anduin. The Wold had never been a thickly populated area – the land was too unforgiving, the semi-nomadic lifestyle of the herdsmen too harsh – but as more and more families moved out of the grasslands and into the East-mark’s larger settlements and towns, an independent éored for the Wold had become increasingly unsustainable. No one had been particularly surprised when the reordering was announced, but it had been painful nonetheless and especially so for Wídfara. Because while his friends were reassigned to one of the three surrounding éoreds in the Eastemnet, all within a few hours ride of home, he had been singled out for transfer to Edoras, a place so foreign to him that it might as well have been Dunland or Rhûn.

His face seemed to betray some of his thoughts to Elfhelm, who put a large, comforting hand on Wídfara’s shoulder. “Change can be tough, son, but it also presents opportunity. And you’ve been given a golden one here. It’s not often that someone gets called up to the king’s éored – I can only remember one other time that it happened, and my memory stretches back longer than you’ve been alive. But your old captain was adamant that there isn’t a finer mounted bowman in all of Rohan and it would be a waste to just reassign you to yet another remote outpost. If you’re even half as good as the men of the East-mark claim, you can make a real name for yourself here.”

Wídfara felt his face grow hot, and he looked down at his feet. No one had told him how this transfer had come to be, and the thought of that dour, taciturn captain singing his praises to anyone was almost more than he could believe. And while he was proud of his own talent, he felt an instinctual urge to defend against the implication that the other riders of the Wold were any less skillful. “Everyone who grew up where I did learned early to shoot from a moving horse, sir,” he offered. “A herd will always attract wolves.”

Elfhelm chuckled. “That may be so, but your captain didn’t convince the Third Marshal of the Mark to send just any old herdsman to us. He picked you. Try to remember that.” A bell behind him tolled, and he glanced toward the door over his shoulder. “I need to get back to some other business, so we’d best get you on your way. You’ll be living in Barracks A with the other unmarried men of the company. You can drop your belongings there and then head over to the armorer to get everything you need. Training starts tomorrow at sunrise.”

“Thank you, Marshal.”

Elfhelm was already halfway out of sight before Wídfara realized that he had no idea how to find either Barracks A or the armorer. He considered calling after Elfhelm for help, but the marshal had indicated that he was busy and surely his other tasks were more important than giving basic directions to an ill-informed newcomer. Instead, he reshouldered his pack with a sigh, resigned to wandering the complex until chance took pity on him again, and he took a few hesitant steps toward his left.

“Other way, Wídfara!”

He looked up to see Elfhelm watching him from the doorway, one foot already inside and the door itself held open with his elbow. The older man laughed and nodded in the opposite direction. “Second building on the right. Can’t miss it.”

A furious blush rushed back to Wídfara’s cheeks, and he winced as he felt it spread across his ears and neck. “Sorry, Marshal. I’m still…I’ll learn my way quickly, I promise.”

Elfhelm stepped back outside, allowing the door to close behind him as he walked a few paces toward Wídfara again. “It’s alright to be new, son. You just need someone to help show you the way of things here.” He cast an appraising eye over Wídfara and chewed thoughtfully on his bottom lip for a moment. “Keep an eye out for Guthláf. He’s from Edoras, but his mother grew up in the Eastemnet and he spent much of his childhood out there. He even talks a lot like you do. You’ll like him, and he’ll help you get to feeling like home again.” He turned once more to head inside.

“Marshal Elfhelm?” Wídfara called after him. “How do I find him? Guthláf, I mean.”

Elfhelm looked back over his shoulder and smiled. “Anywhere there are people gathered, he’ll be right in the middle of it. You can count on that. He’s one of our best, and he’ll take good care of you. Just don’t let him talk you into playing dice with him unless you’ve got money to burn.” He pulled open the door and his last few words drifted out from the hallway. “See you at training first thing tomorrow!”

Wídfara rolled over again, grimacing as his left shoulder made contact with the floor. One of his first tasks that day had been to see the garrison’s armorer, where he had been fitted for new equipment and received the distinctive tattoo that would identify him as a member of the king’s éored: a small crown above a hill. Each éored had its own mark, used as a crude means of identification in the event that a rider was injured or killed far from home, and the armorers typically etched the designs onto the shoulders of new members, punching a small ink-tipped needle repeatedly into the skin to create the necessary lines and curves. The new tattoo left a lingering pain in Wídfara’s arm, though it was minimal compared to the ache he felt in his heart when he watched the armorer draw a line through his old éored’s mark, casually crossing out an entire decade of his life with a few minute’s quick work. But that had just been the start to an increasingly difficult day.

The éored’s clerk seemed unaware that Wídfara had joined the company, and no arrangements had been made yet for his pay. Wídfara was counting on those funds to support his parents back in the Wold, especially now that he was no longer close enough to help his father with the herd work during his free hours, and the possibility that his first wages would be significantly delayed left a sour feeling in his stomach. Then he had gotten lost on his way to the mess hall and again between the mess hall and the stables, where he discovered that the stablehand sent to fetch his horse from last night’s boarding house had brought back the wrong animal. At every turn, he seemed to be in the wrong place, with the wrong information, running into obstacle after obstacle while being constantly asked to repeat himself as the city dwellers struggled to understand his accent.

He had greeted the eventual coming of night with urgent relief, happy to retreat to the privacy of his little room in the barracks where, at least for a few hours, he knew where he was supposed to be and what he was supposed to be doing. But even then, he struggled. The small, soft bed in the room felt unnatural to him after so much time spent sleeping rough in field camps or out on the plains with his family’s horses, and he quickly gave up on it, crafting himself a makeshift bedroll on the floor instead. After an hour of further tossing and turning, though, he realized that the bed wasn’t the only thing that felt wrong. A windowless box barely big enough for both the empty bed and his nest of blankets on the floor was a poor substitute for having shimmering stars overhead and endless golden plains around him, and he wondered how he would ever find rest in such a confined little space. He sat up, frustrated, and decided to take a walk in an attempt to clear his mind.

The streets, at least, were much more enjoyable to him at night, when few others were out and about. It was quieter, and he could walk at his own pace without worrying that he was holding up someone behind him. Keeping close attention to where he turned and how to retrace his steps, he headed up a hill, thinking to get a good view of the city from the top of the rise and perhaps be able to better orient himself amidst the maze of the city’s layout.

It took only a few minutes from the barracks to reach the peak of the hill, but he was disappointed to find that the view down onto Edoras and the surrounding plains was largely obscured by a thin haze in the air and heavy overhead cloud cover that dimmed the light of the moon. The quiet of his walk was also broken by the presence on the hill of a small tavern, a little wood and stone building from which drifted not only the smell of ale and baked bread but the clamor of voices and laughter and singing. The windows were aglow with warm yellow light, and he could see a large and boisterous crowd inside, many members of which seemed to be about his age. He considered going in – his rational mind understood that the only way to make friends in new surroundings was to put himself where other people were – but the thought of dozens of bodies pressed into such a small building made him a bit panicky, and he had already used all the energy his mind could spare that day for navigating the stares, questions and sometimes the judgments of so many others. That would need to be a challenge for tomorrow instead.

He leaned against a corner of the tavern and gazed northeast, back toward the beloved home that was now obscured by the intervention of both distance and weather. A gentle breeze blew from that direction, and he closed his eyes to savor the soft feel of it against his cheek and in his hair. There was a clean, earthy scent to the air, and he willed himself to believe that this sign of a clearer morning on its way could also mean that good things were on their way for him.

At that very moment, the door of the tavern flew open, bouncing noisily off the wall, and a tiny gray dog scampered out, followed by the striding figure of a man in the uniform of his éored.

“I just need to let Slaga out for a minute,” the man called back to unseen companions inside. “Hold the game for me, and I’ll be right back to finish taking the rest of your money.” A laughing chorus of boos rang out as the door swung closed again, and the man chuckled to himself.

Wídfara registered the stranger’s words as they were spoken, but what flooded his heart with joyful recognition was the lilting drawl of their delivery, the comfortingly specific cadence and tone that represented Rohirric as Wídfara’s ear had always heard it voiced. It was the sound of his cousins calling to him from across the grasslands, his friends teasing and joking as they sat around a fire at night. It was the sound of his old life, and he wanted nothing more than to hear it again.

The other man was crouched down now, cooing affectionate endearments at the tiny dog that bounded in adoring circles around his feet, and Wídfara lightly cleared his throat. The man froze at the sound, the last doting little trill dying on his tongue, and he smiled sheepishly when he looked up and saw Wídfara standing just feet away. “I’m sorry. I thought Slaga and I were alone out here or I surely would have kept that to myself.” He stood and extended his hand in Wídfara’s direction. “I don’t think I’ve seen you around before. I’m Guthláf.”

Guthláf. The name chimed immediately in Wídfara’s memory, and he smiled to himself at how effortlessly correct Elfhelm had been on all fronts – where Guthláf would be found, how soothingly familiar he would sound to Wídfara, and how quickly just a few words of that familiar sound would kindle a feeling of comfort and kinship in him. He closed the distance between them with a few steps, and in the dim light that shone from the windows he found himself face to face with an unusually tall, well built man with long blonde waves, a trim blonde beard, and striking eyes of the palest blue. He gripped Guthláf’s hand with grateful enthusiasm and smiled. “Wídfara. You wouldn’t have seen me before, as I only just got here.”

“I certainly don’t have to ask where you came from,” Guthláf said, and Wídfara thought he detected a slight strengthening of Guthláf’s matching accent in the reply. “Welcome to Edoras, Wídfara. What brings you here?”

Wídfara nodded at Guthláf’s uniform. “I’ll be joining your company starting first thing tomorrow.”

“Is that right? We’ll be glad to have you. The boys could use an eastern rider to show them how it’s really done.” He glanced down briefly at the dainty little dog that was now cautiously sniffing Wídfara’s boots. “Don’t hold it against me. The absurd fussing with the dog, I mean. Every man has an embarrassing weakness, and I guess Slaga is mine.”

“Think nothing of it.” Truthfully, in any other circumstance Wídfara would have found both the toy-sized dog and the indulgent spoiling of it a little ridiculous, but he wasn’t about to say that to the first person in the city to take any interest in him. Outside of Elfhelm, who as Wídfara’s commanding officer was certainly no peer of his, it had been a struggle that day just to be noticed by anyone else, let alone engaged with or welcomed. Wídfara was eager not to squander this opportunity, especially with someone who seemed so friendly and good natured. “I love dogs and have nearly always had one myself, though admittedly never one that size.”

“He is small, isn’t he? I got him when he was a puppy and expected him to get bigger as he got older, but he just never did. And by the time I realized I had myself a lapdog, the rascal had already worked his way into my heart.” He bent down and scooped Slaga up into his arms, where he quickly settled with the look of one who spent a lot of time in just that position. Wídfara reached out and gave the dog a gentle rub behind the ears, which was received with a small, contented sigh.

“He doesn’t usually like strangers,” said Guthláf, looking up with a smile. “But then again, you’re not a stranger anymore, are you, Wídfara of the East-mark?”

Wídfara couldn’t identify anything unusual or remarkable about the way this question was asked, nothing that would explain the sudden rush of warmth that settled over him when that open, earnest smile was turned in his direction. But it was there all the same. “Not a stranger, at least not in the technical sense. And I would hope one day to be a friend, though I wouldn’t presume to call you that yet.”

“No? Why not?”

“You barely know anything about me.”

“But that’s not a problem. Discovering things about each other is half the fun of friendship.” He inclined his head and fixed Wídfara with a long, thoughtful look. “And I have a feeling there is much to discover about you.”

The steady gaze of those cool, blue eyes sent an anxious flutter shimmering through Wídfara’s chest, and he looked away. Before he could muster the nerve to speak again, the tavern door opened, and a red-haired head popped out.

“Guthláf, if the game doesn’t restart soon, Hildred insists he’ll take his losses back and charge you interest for making him wait.”

Guthláf laughingly rolled his eyes and waved a hand in concession. “Buy him another ale from my pot and tell him I’ll be right there.” The red haired man nodded and went back inside, and Guthláf turned once again to Wídfara.

“Do you ever play dice? If you’ve got the time now, you can join us, and by the end of the game you’ll have ten more great friends, I promise. Though I can’t promise I won’t take your money.” He waggled his eyebrows. “I’m something of a professional.”

Wídfara laughed. “Believe it or not, I’ve already been warned against playing dice with you, and I don’t know the rules anyway. But I appreciate the offer.” The temptation to stay in the kindly glow of Guthláf’s company was strong, but the tumult of the busy tavern still intimidated him. And the length of the day, with its many ups and downs, was beginning to catch up with him at last. “Will I…or, rather, I hope I’ll see you at training in the morning?”

He cringed inside at how needful the question sounded to his ears, but if Guthláf heard it that way he gave no sign. Instead, he smiled broadly and tapped a fist against Wídfara’s arm.

“Of course. I’ll look for you there, friend. Now wish me luck, not that I need it!” He and his dog slipped back inside with a wave, and Wídfara watched through the window just long enough to see them disappear into a rowdy group of men, all wielding mugs and talking excitedly to one another.

Alone again, he turned then to retrace his steps, mercifully finding his way back to the barracks without incident, and he stretched out once more on his floor with a heavy yawn. The weight of sleep closed in on him quickly, and he soon drifted into the comfort of peaceful rest, where a pair of the palest blue eyes lingered in his dreams.

Notes: Guthláf’s dog is named Slaga, which means “Killer.” Presumably he chose that name before he realized his “puppy” was already full grown and would always be a lil’ tea cup.

@emmanuellececchi @konartiste @sotwk @dreambigdreamz (I don’t usually have a tag list but I tried to @ people who had specifically requested it at some point — if you want off (or on, I guess) don’t hesitate to say so!)

Dividers by the lovely @quillofspirit ♥️

#guthláf #wídfara #rohan #forth eorlingas #obscure blorbos #♥️🐎🗡️#horse boys in love #lotr #lord of the rings #tolkien #guthlaf #widfara

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franeridart · 3 months

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The Housecat Philosophy - Ep 45

Ep 00 || < Prev || Next >

Read ahead on Patreon || Catch up on Webtoon || support me on ko-fi~✨

#artists on tumblr #the housecat philosophy #original comic #webcomic #original art #my sketches #he’s everywhere !!!!!!!#we’ll explain why at some point dw about it #but mainly it’s just daves abysmal luck #i love to make his life harder than it needs be :)#btw guys i just realized but it’s nearly been one year since I started posting this comic on patreon !!!!!!!!!! insane !!!!!!!#and i’m just now getting close to finishing the first part of it ! i still have three characters to introduce !!!!!#this is really gonna take me a while huh #nice

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iloveyouitisruiningmylife · 6 months

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you know it's bad when you hit the 30 tag limit

#like shut up i wasn't done #i feel so unbearably hurt and betrayed like how can i be SO. unimportant to him so less of a priority that he's literally organising his #desk instead of talking to me taking five mins to talk to an agent book a ticket in tatkal #i told him i had to be back by 20 even before coming here on like 5th #and ive been reminding hin this everyday since after diwali #still he just. doesn't care?#and im his daughter? am i his daughter? does it even mean anything?????#ive never felt more alienated from my family than today #isn't it sad i don't even expect anything from mom all she does is tries to lighten the mood by making jokes #im so sick of her even the sight of her her voice makes me want to shout at her #i don't do it ofc but still #everyone is so selfish she's so selfish too she's always complaining about how i don't love her how i don't give her a chance #but that she'll stay away from all important thinhs that actually matter to me like what's the point of having a mother then??? i have my #siblings to listen to me i have my friends you i need u to be an adult and fucking help me in real terms #nvmind that path is just hopeless #anyway in tired of my small fucking life and my same small fucking problems and my own fucking self #everything would be okay if i just studied a little bit harder #idk ive been practicing saying it out loud that i can't study more than tui and after seven times i can say it out loud now #without crying or my voice watering #so hopefully it will go well #tho in my experience i never actually get to sya the stuff i practice to say to him because he dominates the convo so early so fast im #left speechless and shocked and on the verge of tears AGAUN #it's fine im calm now #but after crying headache ugh i did not miss u at all going back to storing all breakdowns in a bottle

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worstloki · 2 years

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New favourite genre it’s called Thor pining for his younger brother for like a full bunch of centuries only for him to confess and Loki to be standing there having no clue like what

#Loki: wait WHAT #Thor: I like you. I’ve liked you for a while.#Loki: [literally zoning out rn. he thinks Thor is perfect so something like this doesn’t make any sense]#Thor: 🥺😭😭#love me some Thor feeling guilty about it on top of not having the perfect image he’s expected to #Thor: I know you’re my brother and I wouldn’t ever risk losing that but it’s the truth #Loki: (asexual and still thinks attraction is a joke) ok ok this is fine we can manage this #Thor: DONT TELL MOTHER #Loki: DO I LOOK LIKE IM GOING TO TELL ANYONE #thorki #Thor/Loki #huge fan of Loki being horrified bc he’s got bro feelings only but thinking bout it romantically and being like hmm maybe it wouldn’t be bad #anyway these bros are need to talk more #Loki: never doubt that I love you #Thor: (dying inside trying to no homo their relationship so hard) thanks.#Thor like I can’t tell him why the mourning hit me way harder than everyone else bc it would have anyway. *says we all mourned you*#Thor like wowoww my crush of 850 years came back from the death looking murderous... kinda hot tho #living the life tbh #if only it wasn’t his brother ya know #which becomes even funnier if he’s told they’re not brothers because it’s like.#wait so if you fools hadn’t adopted him we could’ve #Thor blaming Odin and Frigga for his failing love life is hilarious #Thor not being able to reject Loki as his brother even if they don’t share blood vs not wanting to be brothers bc that means he’s not wrong #Loki will be looking at Thor like he’s everything to him and Thor is there sweating like haha brother y doth Thou tempt me like this #loki: *literally oblivious. wonders why Thor is growing so mean over the centuries. feels like there’s a distance between them. sad.*#thor: WE ARE GOING HUNTING AND HAVE TO SHARE A TENT I AM NOT GOING TO SURVIVE THIS AGAIN #loki: why won’t he snuggle anymore :(#Thor will be like I have no choice in this situation but to speak the truth and confess and Loki is like YOU LIKE MEN?????????

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mieczyhale · 1 year

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post: steve shaves his head

me: ..okay.. i guess i get it..

post: and then eddie shaves his head

me, anxious and nauseous: NO THE FUCK HE DOES NOT

#not in solidarity not ever #his hair is important #it's one of the ways he took and keeps control of his own appearance #it's one of the ways he says 'fuck you' to societal rules and expectations #it's important for headbanging #(you can headbang without the hair but it's not the same i promise)#and i love it and need people to stop trying to make eddie into a Regular Dude #i know that post in particular was supposed to be a 'he did it in solidarity with steve' thing but they also phrased it #as them both getting 'a fresh start' at life and shedding reputations or whatever and i hate it #steve wanting to be known for more than his hair is even kinda dumb. to shave it to 'take control from his parents' or whatever #s1 hair was his parents control. his hair after that is all him and he cares about it. likes caring about it. helps dustin with #his own hair. its not a negative thing for steve.#steve is a bisexual who babysits kids that call him mom his best friend is a lesbian and he fights monsters - there's a lot of ways you can #go about giving him freedom and power from/over his parents that doesnt include removing a feature he likes about himself #as for eddie - his whole thing is him not giving a fuck what people think. or at least trying to not give a fuck #its obviously a lot harder when people have decided you're a murderer (with zero proof and based 100% on their idea of you) but #even then - as dustin points out - he never stopped being eddie. no matter the threat against him he never changes anything about himself #to appease others or appeal to others. so why - after all of that - would he be up for a change??? and into something more normal-looking??#nobody gets to dictate anything about him - hasnt since he got away from whoever made him shave his head as a kid - and #they both have fucked up reputations - some of it true and some of it not - but why would they give a fuck?? after EVERYTHING??#steve has grown past stupid high school bullshit like 'popularity' so why would a stupid high school reputation that hasnt been accurate #for years matter to him?? everyone who matters knows him better than that #same goes for eddie #so like... idk man. i know im weirdly attached to certain things about certain characters and yeah it's 'just hair' but like..#when your hair isnt yours to control and then it finally is?? that's a big deal. that's important #and i know i wouldnt give it up for shit.#and maybe shaving their heads could be their decision but i really truly dont fucking think it would be #even just hair cuts feel like No. nope. no thank u. put that hair back where u found it and keep it there #mystposts

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faultsofyouth · 11 months

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literally when I see women being frustrated with other women for staying with abusive men I feel like I'm watching the ouroboros. Like I get it, it happens to everyone, I've been there, but it's so self sabatoging.

#don't come at me if you're one of those girls currently angry at her friend for continuing to date an abuser after you and everyone else #told her not to #I spent 7 years watching different men beat my mother and I've had a lot of friends who faced very different kinds of abuse from other men #so when I say your anger is not constructive believe me because it is my anger too. and I know it hurts and I know it can drive you insane #but when your friend Sees that anger it will hurt her in a way you cannot understand. And if you are hurting her while you claim to love he #while you claim to have her best interests at heart -> then she cannot differentiate between the way you treat her #and the way her abuser does. And I know that's not fair I know it's not the same #And I know you probably care for her in a way her man does not. But when you tell her what to do she doesn't see You.#She sees the man who tells her what to do and how to live. She won't listen to you over that man because you sound the same #You sound eerily similar but he is manipulating her and you are just angry and upset. He will always seem to offer the better deal #so just don't be that angry friend anymore. Be an open door she can walk through whenever she needs a break from an evil man.#Be the life she Could have if she really believed she deserved it. Be good and respectful and supportive even when you feel like killing hi #show her how Everyone should treat her. Show her she deserves to be treated good; show her it is no problem for You to treat her good #And she Will start demanding that from men. From everyone. But she will do it on her own time #With her own setbacks and she will set her own standards. They might never be your standards but they will be better than what they are now #but first you have to be supportive and not angry. You have to root for what She wants and not for her relationship to fail #Even if you really truly hope the relationship will fail. You have to convince her that you want the same things she wants #You have to convince her that you want her to be happy no matter what that looks like. And Then she will ask you #To help make her life happier. And in my experience; that is the only way to truly see someone get to a better place #You have to help them get what they Want. This is way harder than being angry. Insanely harder. But I have seen women change a Lot #after I stopped feeling angry over them. After I stopped trying to convince them that I know what is best for them

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bjurnberg · 5 months

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My work boots are the most expensive shoes I’ve ever owned.

Also the most comfortable. I chose them after trying on several different brands and comparing lifespan vs usage vs comfort - I needed them for a physically demanding job, not the weekend hiking trails. I could have easily chosen cheaper boots that would have lasted long enough to be worth their low price, but I know the Sam Vimes Boot Theory and knew weaker, less comfortable boots would make my life harder in the long run.

So when the outside edge of the heel started wearing down after three years of heavy use I went to the shop I got them from and said “hey this is a common problem for me with how I walk but now it’s affecting my ankles and knees and I don’t wanna have to buy a new pair, is there a way to fix this?”

The salesman at this very fancy upscale boot store said “oh yeah, there’s a shoe repair place that can give you some heel guards - it’ll keep the rubber from wearing out.”

So at 8am this morning right after my 9hr shift ends I went to the shoe repair shop and it is the most hole-in-the-wall, is-this-a-real-business-or-a-mafia-front, am-I-gonna-get-shot tiny cinder block cube I’ve ever seen in my life. I grew up plenty poor and love me a good hole-in-the-wall business, but going from upscale store to this cash-only repair shop gave me whiplash. Wasn’t expecting this when a guy who wears three piece suits to sell boots said it’s the best place to go.

The skinny kid behind the counter looks somehow 16 and 25 at the same time, but when I tell him this place was recommended he smiles and says to hand over my boots. I hand him the vaguely warm foot-smelling boots, and stand in my socks in the 3’ square entryway surrounded by every color leather polish you could buy and watch as he turns my boots around in his hands, sizes up a crescent moon bits of plastic, and unceremoniously hammers tiny nails through them before handing them back.

The heels are perfectly level again. I can walk without almost rolling my ankles. They don’t clack loudly on the pavement or feel different. This is gonna fix my knee pain. It cost $10.

This kid had every tool he needed within arms reach, worked fast and smoothly, I was in and out the door in less than 8 minutes, and it only cost $10.

I didn’t think anything could cost only $10 anymore. I’m so used to hyperinflation prices I was spiritually thrown back to the 1400’s visiting the cobbler in town square. This kid might have been that cobbler and just decided to never die.

I’m still reeling from the whiplash, and gobsmacked at the price, and thrilled I didn’t have to go buy new, worse work boots (cuz I don’t have that kind of money for a second pair, I’m expecting these ones to last a decade) and it feels like I just experienced one of the rare little chunks of magic that floats around our world.

#shoe repair #cobbler magic #good work boots are a necessary part of life #and finding a cobbler I can take other shoes to is gonna change my life #I love craftsmen #bjurnberg

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cocklessboy · 3 months

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The other day I told a friend of mine that I never forget to take my ADHD meds because I fucking love my ADHD meds. I'm in my late 30s, I didn't finally get a diagnosis and meds until less than two years ago, and they have changed my entire life.

And he raised his eyebrow at me. We'd been discussing addictive medications a few minutes before, like the Tramadol I finally got from the pain specialist to take once a week or so to give me a break from my chronic pain, so I reassured him that methylpenidate (Ritalin/Concerta) is not addictive (at least not in people with ADHD).

His response? To raise his eyebrow even harder and say "Well it sure SOUNDS like it's addictive!"

And I had to explain to this man - who works in a healthcare related job by the way - that just because medication makes you feel good and helps you, just because you look forward to taking it, that doesn't make it addictive or dangerous. And he wasn't convinced.

The simple fact that I was excited to take a daily pill that has literally changed my life, after decades of fighting to get that medication, made him think I shouldn't be taking it so often. That it must inherently be dangerous.

I'm not even in America, but I'm pretty sure this attitude began there and then spread over here to Europe. This Puritan idea of "if something feels good, you must beware of it. Pleasure is dangerous, it is sinful, it is addiction, it is evil."

I know too many people who subconsciously believe that pleasure = addictive = dangerous = bad. Joy is a slippery slope to hell.

So here is your reminder for today that you don't need to be afraid of feeling good. If something improves your life, use it. Even if it is addictive - learn what that addiction means, whether the addiction is inherently dangerous or not, and whether the benefits outweigh the drawbacks and risks.

My ADHD meds are, in fact, not addictive. But I will take them every day because they make my life orders of magnitude easier. I will enjoy them every time I take them.

My tramadol is addictive. I will still take it. I will keep it on a schedule to avoid becoming addicted, primarily because addiction in this case would mean reduced effectiveness. But I am not afraid of my painkillers. They are life changing.

Take your meds, everyone. Don't let anyone scare you away from doing something that improves your life.

#adhd #medication #ritalin #concerta #methylphenidate #addiction #puritan values #neurodivergence #actually adhd #take your meds

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fairy-hub · 2 months

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“𝐬𝐚𝐲 𝐦𝐲 𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞, 𝐬𝐚𝐲 𝐝𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐈’𝐦 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫’𝐬”

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬! praising degradation, daddy/mama/brat, hints of jealousy/possessive!stoner!suguru, squirting, teasing, choking, squirting, mating press, pain kink, size kink, two fingers in your ass, mindbreak/getting cockdrunk, begging, a momentary just the tip moment, riding him, overstimulation, breeding, stuffing his cum into you, some spanking

𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧! I have a praise kink and a degradation kink, I need Geto to tell me that I'm his favourite dirty little slut and absolutely nail me to the mattress while doing 🥵🥵🥵

Oreo: I was thinking of a part two of stoner!suguru with this one, even though he doesn't smoke. I like the follow up of him finally deciding he wants to be more than just friends

Slapping your soft cunt and yanking your legs back open when you go to black the next hit. He demands, “Color?” Leaning forward, towering over you to make you feel smaller.

Using his weight to keep you pinned in a firm mating press. His thick cock nudging your soft cunt. Shoving your hips trying to best to glide an inch in your sore cunt. Eager for the sweet pleasure to cut through the pain.

You whine, “Green! Please don't be mad! I didn't mean to make you jealous, didn't think.” He grabs your throat, tightly squeezing.

“Didn't think I’d want your beautiful ass all to myself?” Softly kissing your forehead, smiling down at you tightening his grasp around your neck.

He croons, “Mama we've been living together and fucked on nearly every surface of his apartment. N’ you spent every night in my bed, so tell me whose are you?” Letting your neck go, grabbing your hands putting them above your hand.

“Who takes care of you?” By the time you catch your breath, he slaps your cunt harder than before. Stuffing one thick finger in softly curling it stroking your sweet spot to ease your discomfort.

Reaching for Suguru he pins your wrists together with one large hand. Gliding a second finger in, touching your clit, and then nothing. Suguru refuses to move his fingers.

The lack of stimulation makes it easier to think. You look into Suguru’s loving, dark chocolate eyes. “You do! I love the life we have made, our routine. I adore how you notice the little things about me.” He pumps his fingers twice, then stops. “I love the softness in your voice when you say name.” He softly rubs your clit and slowly pumps his fingers, stroking your sweet spot.

He purses his lips and looks at his side table whilst admitting, “I supposed I never outright asked you.” The passionate, hungry intensity in his dark brown eyes is exciting. Suguru glides his fingers out smirking when you whine.

Dipping his head watching your soft hole clenching nothing. “This is also too much fun. I’ll take any chance I get to fuck into your head that you’re mine.” Teasing you with a small swirl of his thumb.

“Please!” Wiggling your hips trying to slips his thumb in, Suguru pulls away. Leaving you on the edge of the bed with your legs spread and your cunt yearning to stimulation.

Opening the bottom bedside drawer pulling out a long black box. Taking out a necklace whilst walking around the bed, standing in front of it. There is a S dangling from a thin chain.

He softly smiles, “Do you wanna be with me?” He unfastens the clasp holding the necklace open.

You stand up on his bed “Yes!” Wrapping your arms around him. Suguru bites the second his head gets near your chest. You cunt clenches from the sweet pain.

Slipping your hand into Suguru’s soft hair, softly tugging making him groan and bucks his hips. “Sit down for me mama lemma slip this on you before I rearrange your guts.” You kneel close to the edge of the bed.

Suguru carefully puts the necklace on you. He softly kisses the top of your head. You insist, “I need to get you something, or do something for you.” He grabs your throat pinning you to the bed, slapping your soft cunt.

“How about you take my cock like a good slut?” He grabs his cock, lining himself up. Giving your neck a tighter squeeze before letting go. He leans back to watch your soft tight cunt stretch for his thick cockhead.

He grabs your thighs, pinning you in a mating press. Groaning as he glides his thick head in and out. Watching the soft ridge of his cock head tug on your soft cunt. “Such a pretty little cunt, love see her stretch nm grip my cock like she doesn’t wanna let me go.”

You plea, “Please lemme feel the rest of you. Wanna feel all of your cock! Daddy please!” He roughly rocks his hips forward, giving you all of his thick veiny cock.

Suguru doesn’t move his hard cock, stroking your clit. Groaning when you clench him. He croons, “Daddy what? I’m letting you feel all of my cock what else doesn’t my pretty little slut need?”

Begging Suguru, “Daddy please fuck me! Fuck your slut into a stupid mess! Wanna be your beautiful spoiled cocky sleeve. Please fuck me however you want!” He grabs your hips, lifting your lower half off the bed.

Using his firm grasp to help you meet his rough thrusts. His hips slapping yours. The bed softly rocking, his heavy wooden headboard tapping the wall. “Nnn fuck fuck fuck! Gonna breed ya? Ya want that? Ya wanna be pretty little cum filled whore?” Your cunt spams around his cunt.

His hard cock stroking, stretching and hitting your cunt perfectly. Sweet intense pleasure makes it hard to think. Why should you bother when you can mindlessly take Suguru’s fat cock?

“Nnnnn! Hhhhnnn! Mmm fuckkkk! Feelsgoodfeelsnnn!” You grab the bedsheets. Unable to think about anything else but how good his cock feels in your cunt. Nothing else matters but your boyfriend’s large hands, thick cock, sweet groans, and the way he is admiring you.

Suguru croons, “Are ya my mindless cock hungry slut? Mmm? Want me to bully your soft tight cunt?” Keeping his pace the same and fucking his cock into you hard.

You muster the words to answer Suguru beyond, “Daddy! Daddy! Nnn! Bully the brat outta me!” Suguru leans over you, grabbing your neck to lift you off the bed. You feel so small in his grasp, so perfectly helpless to do anything but take his cock.

Bouncing you faster on his thick cock, his moans getting louder, breathier. “Sofuckingood wanna cum in your soft cunt! Been thinking about it all I’ve been able to think about since I saw you flirting with him. I should’ve fucked in ya in the bathroom then sent you back over with my cum leaking out.” Your cunt clenches.

Suguru smirks, “Of course a slut like you would like that. You’re daddy’s little slut, remember that.”

You’re getting on his possessiveness and manhandling. Grabbing his thick hard biceps, digging in your nails when he flexes. “Daddy’s so big!” Your words trigger something within Suguru.

Without gliding his cock out he flips you over pinning you to the bed. With your ass arched in the air and a firm grasp on your hair, keeping your face out of the pillow.

Using his weight to keep you from wiggling away from him mercilessly. “Gonna fuck my cum into you, don’t wanna stop. Wanna keep fucking my big cock into your sweet cunt.” You can feel his cock’s veins pulse as he’s getting closer.

His balls are slapping your clit with each rough thrust. Your ass clapping, your soaking wet cunt squelching.

You love how whiny Suguru is the closer he is. The way his body shivers on top of you, his rough smooth pace momentarily faltering. He whines, “What am I?”

Slipping your fingers into Suguru’s soft dark hair. “Daddy! Mine! Daddy! You’re too much! Too much! Too good. Please cum!” He yanks your head to the side, hunching over to bite your throat.

Warm thick cum trickles and spurts into your soft cunt. Your cunt spasms then gush, thick slick trickling down your thighs. Suguru groans, his pace sloppy and rough.

There is something so carnal about Suguru biting your keep whilst firmly pinning you down to fuck his cum into. You want more, more of his thick cock and warm cum.

You whine, grinding your hips when he falters and stops. “Suguru!” He rolls over with you on top. Keeping his cum deep in you with his cock.

Right away you take the chance, grabbing his thick thighs, lifting your hips, and bouncing on Suguru’s cock. Moaning, trembling, toes curling. Getting off on using his cock like a dildo. Whilst knowing your soft tight cunt is overwhelming him with each stroke.

Leaning forward giving him a good view of your soft cunt taking his cock. His thick cum trickles out of your cunt and coats his thick cock. “Can’t get over how deep your fat cock is. It’s stuffing your cum in so deep!”

Looking over your shoulder to see Suguru. “Thought you were gonna teach my slutty ass a lesson?” Suguru smirks then sucks on two thick fingers. Your cunt clenches when he touches your asshole. Smearing his spit then gliding both fingers in.

He stretches his fingers apart spreading your asshole. Your pace falters, he isn’t moving his fingers. “Teach you what? That you’re such a desperate whore. I think ya know that with how you’re bouncing on my thick cock like it’s all you can think about.” Slowly fucking his fingers into your soft ass.

“Go on mama tire your little pretty bratty ass out. I wanna hear you beg me to fuck ya when your legs get too tired.”

Oreo m.list

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