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ticklepinions · 2 months

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Everyone should read the following. If we are a community you need to understand a few things.

Are you entitled to say anything you want due to "free speech"? Hell yeah!

Should you? Absolutely the fuck not!

The blatant racism, anti-queerness, transphobia, misogyny and fatphobia I have seen is down right abhorrent. And if you display any of these ideologies or opinions, you simply do not belong here. You shouldn't be comfortable making a safe space for yourself as you make this lovely community unsafe for the rest of us.

There is nothing political about human rights. But unfortunately that's where we are in this life. I'll try not to be biased but certain political leanings tells me all I need to know about you. POC conservatives will always make me laugh. You are nothing but a pawn for the cis/hetero/whites who don't give a shit if you live or die. Nothing but a slur, a body to dispose of. You may share their views but they are not sharing the power and privilege they have with you.

Let's talk about certain individuals who act so tough under the "big strong amurican sharing their views just to get shitted on, fucking snowflakes". Why do you want to be oppressed so badly? Why do you purposely antagonize people and then when they defend themselves you try dismissing them by saying how they're wasting their time... The irony of it all. The sheer ignorance.

I feel sorry for you people. Truly, I do. But I'll be damned if I let any of you try to tear any of us down for having opinions and ideologies (hint hint see the irony?) that fight for the rights of people who don't have them.

And let me get something clear- from the river to the sea. We all should not stop fighting till all of us are free. There are so many resources out there to educate yourself, yet you choose to remain ignorant. You do not belong here. You act as though you are better than everyone else because you have "edgy" opinions, opinions that literally call for the deaths of the marginalized and oppressed. You do not belong here. You have the gall to tell people they are wasting their time, when their sheer existence alone is putting them at risk for isolation and death (by the same bigoted people you support). You do not belong here.

If an elephant (Israel) has it's foot on a mouse's (Palestine) tail, tell me which one is truly the one at risk. There is a gen0cide going on. If Israel is trying to reclaim it's "land" why bomb it? Why destroy it? With a military with their degree they should be able to eliminate all these "terr0rists" with minimal to no "collateral damage" (aka the 30,000 innocent Palestinians, 2/3rds of which were woman and children, with countless injured, orphaned, homeless and starving). Why bomb hospitals, mosques, sacred places? Standing with Palestinian people is not antisemitism, it's anti gen0cide and war crimes (a multitude of which Israel has shamelessly committed).

And I'm not on anon. I stand for the people of Palestine. I stand for justice. I stand for equity. I stand for the freedom of all oppressed people.

And I implore everyone who follows me to educate themselves. The right path does not lead you to discriminate against the marginalized. Continue to fight my friends, continue to amplify the voices of those unheard, continue making this community and those you belong to, safe for all and unsafe for those who think otherwise.

For you @knismosexual + @littleonelee

I hope you truly reflect on how your actions impacts this entire community and the communities you live in. Until you learn how to act right, unfortunately this community isn't for you. You shouldn't feel welcome here. You shouldn't feel like you belong here. DMs are wide open if you have any thoughts. But again I say, supporting transphobic, racist, anti-queer, misogynistic, discriminatory views is not simply an "opinion" or personality to adopt. You are hurting real people, accepting the deaths and harassment that plague them every single day. You have no place in this community.

#twordpinion #tword community #tickle community #ticklepinion #tword content #tickling #important #important post #free palestine

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writing-for-life · 9 months

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Nuance in (The Sandman) Fandom

Send me asks about everything Sandman-related!

I thought a lot over the past few days, partly prompted by discourse on here, partly due to a couple of “interesting” asks and messages I received (the type you don’t answer). I *think* they might have been prompted by engaging in discourse on topics like anti-blackness/racism, misogyny/sexism, TERF characters etc in The Sandman.

Fandoms are always getting super sensitive if someone shines a critical lens on their favourite works, authors and characters. So to make this clear (in case it isn’t already obvious from my brain-rot blog):

I love The Sandman. I love Neil Gaiman. I have an extremely soft spot for Dream (and Desire btw, who deserves a lot more character analysis than just being summed up as “villainous, sexy bitch”. One day, perhaps ;)).

I can read The Sandman and just get lost in the story, even after decades and many rereads.

But I can also view it through a critical lens—these things aren’t mutually exclusive.

Not critical enough or too critical?

As fans, we can get trapped in certain thinking patterns, like:

“My blorbo can do no wrong”-syndrome

“Characters with flaws are inherently problematic and imply authorial endorsement of those actions”

“Characterisation and problematic subtext are one and the same” (aka overanalysing and looking for problems where there are none is the death of every story, but failing to see problematic patterns where they are clearly visible is a problem, too).

Don't say anything bad about my favourite character

I think this doesn’t need much further exploration. It’s not my personal way of looking at stories through permanently rose-tinted glasses (I always feel it stalls my experience, but my experience is not everyone else's). Some people prefer that type of escapism, and I’m good with that (although the downside is of course that by not willing to engage with issues, we can unwillingly perpetuate them). Live and let live, ship and let sail. But please, for the love of god: Don’t insult people via their inboxes or messages just because their opinions and preferences don’t align with yours. I’m not going to sugarcoat it or phrase it “nicely”: It’s infantile (and a form of bullying btw), end of.

How can you even like a character who's so horrible? And that author must be equally horrible, too

We have to separate flawed characters, even those who are written to be really problematic, from real-life endorsement of these actions.

Author, narrator and character are three fundamentally different things, and don’t overlap as much as some people seem to think.

We can write vile, despicable characters to make a point (for me, Thessaly was always a prime example for this, and I explained why here). We probably hate them as we write them. I don’t know what else to say, but this facet of writing seems to get more and more lost on people, and it’s a worry. Crying for sanitised characterisation is one step away from censorship. We explore what is problematic about people and humanity through story. That’s how we process and learn. It’s nothing new, but it becomes impossible if we can’t write flawed and even disgusting characters.

Face value…

Since I’m mostly in The Sandman fandom, I often read that its ending is hopeless, and that’s supposedly the entire message.

It is agonisingly sad, yes. But is it truly hopeless? I personally see it as quite the opposite, but of course that’s my opinion, coloured by my life experiences.

I also get that show-only fans often haven’t read the comics, or at least not the whole arc. And as such, their outlook from what they’ve seen so far (and choose to focus on) has to be different by default. I also understand that many people are quite new to the comics, even if they have read them in their entirety. I’ve sat with them for 30 years, and I still find new things on every reread (and I read it more times than anyone should 🙈), and I still don’t feel like I’ve understood it all. Perhaps because I still haven’t fully understood myself (and it’s unlikely I ever will). If there’s one thing The Sandman isn’t, it’s one-dimensional and easy to grasp in its whole depth.

I just wrote a ginormous meta on it, if you’re interested, it’s here:

Subtext, (not so) glorious subtext

This is where it gets complicated:

We shouldn’t mix up characterisation and story subtext. Overanalysing every line to death will always make us find something that’s “problematic”, when it really isn’t in the wider context of the story.

Zooming in is NOT always a good thing. Sometimes, we actually need to zoom out.

But subtext *can be* (accidentally) problematic. Even in stories we love. And none of this negates what I previously wrote.

Stories have real-life implications of sorts, and we need to be able to talk about it. That’s where those slightly flabbergasting, hostile inbox messages come in, and I want to expand on that "topic of contention" a bit:

Neil himself confirmed that the Endless basically warp reality, and that this is why, after Dream’s failed relationship with Nada, many black women in his vicinity suffer terrible fates (Ruby and Carla in particular). And that this spell is only broken when he dies, and that it is the reason why Gwen doesn’t suffer the same fate. And said Gwen then gets used as a plot device to basically absolve Hob (who canonically really is a problematic character, whether show-only fans like it or not) from his slaver past. Once again, very clearly: No one is making this up. Neil confirmed it (for the comics, and that was over 20 years ago. It remains to be seen if his stance has changed as we move into that arc in the TV show).

I don't think it is correct to imply that Dream as a character is racist (I've read that, too) because he logically can’t be. He holds *all* the collective unconscious. He is also, strictly speaking, not white. He is everything and nothing, and he shows up in many different ethnicities throughout the whole arc, depending on who looks at him. But Neil played with a subtext here (reality warping due to a bad relationship which then affects everyone with similar physical traits) that will read very differently to a black person than it reads to a white person, and we have to understand why that is an *extremely* slippery slope.

Plus, we are supposed to see Hob, who *was* a racist at some point (you can’t not be if you’re a slave-trader—it’s impossible by default) as redeemed. And yes, he *does* regret deeply, good for him (and if I were saying this aloud, you would hear the sarcasm in my voice, because it is indeed all about him. We are to sympathise/empathise with him and his character growth while there isn’t much mention of the people he maltreated). But also: it was a black woman who basically forgave him (with dialogue that personally makes me cringe). And that black woman who offers forgiveness is not truly a black woman—she is a character written by a white man. And as much as author and character are not the same (see above), there is an inherent sensitivity in that power imbalance that we can't brush under the carpet.

I don’t think Neil is racist. Probably quite the opposite, and I can even see that his intentions were good from a storytelling point of view. BUT intention and impact are two fundamentally different things, and telling the story this way (comic version) betrays blindspots only white people have. Just like women have blindspots when they tell stories about men, and men have blindspots when they tell stories about women (and there are a few of those in The Sandman, too). And and and…

As storytellers, we can’t always speak from lived experience. It’s impossible. And that also means we occasionally make mistakes that look bad in hindsight, even if our intentions were good.

I guess the proof is in the pudding: What do we do when people who *have* that lived experience tell us it looks bad? If they inform us why it is hurtful, plays into old stereotypes etc?

Are we willing to listen and yield (both are the foundations of allyship btw), or are we insisting that our viewpoint as someone *without* lived experience is right? That lived experience extends to all lived experiences (sex/gender, sexual orientation, age...), and from all we’ve heard from Neil so far, it seems important to him to rewrite what he sees differently today. Whether they’ll always get it right for the show—we’ll see. At the moment, it looks a lot better than in the comics, and certain issues are already being handled with a lot more sensitivity, but a few problems remain.

Pushing back on criticism that comes from people with lived experience is problematic—I’d encourage us to think about what it looks like if a white majority in the fandom is basically saying that the opinions of POC are essentially “overreactions” (and yes, that happened).

It’s complicated. The Sandman was written in a different time, and I think we have to distinguish between things that weren’t really problematic at the time but have aged poorly (again, Thessaly springs to mind, and I have lived experience as a queer person during that time, so I can see it in context while at the same time acknowledging that I would make changes to bring it to the present day), and things that were always a problem due to blindspots. They were a problem in 1990, and if they don’t get changed, they are still a problem today.

This fandom is generally so much more open and nicer than others I know. But that doesn’t mean it’s infallible, because it’s full of humans.

Nuance is sorely needed, in both story interpretation and interaction between said humans.

#fandom discourse #fandom blindspots #sandman meta #sandman spoilers #the sandman #dream of the endless #hob gadling #nada #morpheus #sandman

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tocomplainfriend · 2 months

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After seeing the whole val controversy, I'm started to feel guilty for liking villains. I like bad guys because they make stories entertaining even if val isn't my favorite at all. What's the line of liking villains? Should cosplaying them considered illegal now? Or we shouldn't enjoy villains anymore. I like villains because they challenge the protagonist's morality or in some case the protagonists themselves becoming villains. It's fun seeing characters becoming the worst version of themselves, a warning to audiences that anyone is capable of doing bad if put in the right situation. I'm not trying to defend any side btw.

TW: rape, pedophilia

That wasn't the point- There are people who should feel allowed to feel uncomfy cosplaying villains (specially a one that's an r-pist). -And those people should be allowed to voice in their opinion.

There are points where you can like a character in different ways

Many villains are written greatly and real charismatic. But you do need to understand that what they do is bad, and not romantize their actions.

Many of these Val fans (for what ever reason) tried too hard to defend the rights of real life r-pists. Or say "But you like (x character that isn't a r-pist)" which I think is dumb.

We get to distance certain things in media from reality, but the closest it gets to something like r-pe or P-dophilia alot of people back off. -and I think when it comes to something like that- people should be really careful and aware to not delete the forces of their actions. I mean, in HB all the main character kills a shit ton of humans in the series, but we don't care- we worry about their personal lives and emotions as if they didn't kill innocent humans in that Verosika episode (and others). The humans they kill in the bg don't matter and are not given emotions so we don't care about heir death- in real life we do value human life (or we should!) even if people we don't know to have a sad backstory. But in media, you need to approach things like r-pe or P-dophilia more carefully and seriously. The amount of normalization of r-pe culture in real life is really big. And yes, fictions does affect reality. I do think there are levels of people having less emotions of people dying by the normalization a dehumanization of certain groups of people irl. More people would care about injustices if the media and world didn't try to dehumanize the groups of people they attack irl. If the USA didn't try hard to spread racism, xenophobia to justify their actions, a lot more people would be speaking about it more.

People need to be more sensitive, is what I'm saying.

#vivziepop critical #hazbin hotel critical #vivziepop critique #helluva boss critical #helluva boss critique #helluva boss criticism #vivziepop criticism #tw sa #tw abuse #tw rape

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miilkyrolls · 13 days

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okay fine, Murder at homecoming, YOU WIN

so i finally finished MaH after putting off continuing past chapter 1 since like...february and, i almost used this book as a diamond mine cause i preemptively was like "this looks lame 😒"

... i came, i laughed, i gasped, i yelled, i cried and i left... then i CAME BACK BECAUSE HOLY MOTHER OF REPLAY-ABILITY BATMAN🥲

but no this book hits right where it needed too. I know one of the biggest upsets people have with MaH is A) the villain being guessable and B) not solving Perdita's disappearance and sorta C/ B.2) it being a standalone. and imo for A, that's up to you to feel that way. imo cause choices is a visual form of content, it's kinda hard to have genuinely surprising "twist" villains cause the visuals already clue you into who done-did it unless they pull the twist straight out they ass(i feel this way about movies and shows too. the only way surprises genuinely get me is in books or podcasts, so non visual entertainment)

and B/C, i actually think NOT solving perdita's story AND making it a standalone was actually very mature of PB (first and possibly last time i'll ever say that in this day and age 💀). it's possible they might've made it their next teen drama series if they had the budget. But unfortunately it's honestly realistic. unfortunately a lot of women go missing and rarely do they get found alive and in a short amount of time (esp if you have as a bipoc mc/ perdita). it's an extremely tragic cookie crumble that unfortunately a lot of mysteries in our lives often take us our entire lives to solve and a lot of them we'll never solve in our lifetime. it's a great paradox / parallel to gabbie's death. it took us all of say 4/5 months (cause in the US, most schools go on winter break in late December) to solve with justice being fairly swift, fair, and harsh but unfortunately a lot of victims don't get their day for a long while, if ever. it's a healthy ying and yang of enjoying fictional justice but it being unrealistic with acknowledging the devastation of losing real victims while acknowledging those lost and their unsung stories that we should never completely give up on their days to come. (ofc however, i hc that perdita is still alive and uncovered corruption in the city and knew that making her family deal with legal repercussions would make their lives more difficult and be ostracized by the elites of Beachwood, so she just left and changed her identity. i like to think she did it also cause MC deserved to have a normal teenhood and not be ousted for her actions)

also i love the open and candid conversations around the treatment of queer children, bipoc mistreatment , misogyny, sa and grief. idk why but the ability to choose if you'd experienced homophobia/ transphobia based on your pronouns and who you've romanced, and tyler talking about thinking he was straight before meeting us (i had a masc body) idk why but i like that touch. i feel like PB kinda grazes over the aspect of being queer / trans and the concept of love, coming out, and society acceptance when your same sex romancing/ nonbinary so it's real shocking when they actually..idk address that thing😭. it's nice to have characters acknowledging their sexuality rather then just be automatically playersexual and everyone around them is just immediately accepting/ suddenly bigotry just seems to evaporate for mc's life/ society

also also, WE CAN BE POLY AND LIKE ITS CALLED POLY AND EVERYONE IS HAPPY AND THE LI WE DON'T CHOOSE AREN'T FORCED ONTO US/ GIVEN AS A OPTION

smaller things: i like the heavy usage of sound effects, idk why but i do. i like the flashbacks into mc's and perdita's relationship, the mix of free and paid clues that are non linear, STEVIE (yes she needs her own category)

overall: 9.2/10. i really like this book, it's going on my personal shelf next to the likes of crimes of passion (minus proposal...), Queen B, big sky country, blood bound, immortal desires 1, and with every heartbeat for my good book shelf

#PLS give MaH the fandom she DESERVES #pixelberry #choices #choices stories we play #playchoices #choices stories you play #murder at homecoming

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lemotmo · 11 days

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You know I’ve tried so hard to stay neutral on the whole Lou/Tommy of it all. But he did another cameo, which he apparently upped the prices the 145 a video?? But he did another one and he dismissed all of Tommy’s past behavior as being corny and teasing which…does not sit right with me. Like racism, misogyny, toxicity, silent compliance of it all….is not just being corny and teasing. And then he ends the video by talking about Tommy came in at the last minute to save the day and save Bobby and Athena so everyone should be good with him now….. like now we’re taking credit for Hens stuff too?

Idk none of that sat well with me at all and if he is sticking around for any of season 8 I think I need the show to just be like no more cameos from you or something.

Hi Nonny, hope the rest of your day was great. Don't allow things like this to get to you too much. If you feel you need a break from social media, make sure to take it. There is already enough stress in real life, don't let it seep into your fandom life as well. Take care of yourself first. You deserve only the best.

Now on to your ask:

I haven’t seen the cameo you are talking about. I have no desire to see that cameo either. I’ve watched one of Lou’s cameos, way back in the beginning when he started doing them. I found it funny, if a little weird that someone would pay for that, but to each their own.

I’ve been hearing about these cameos more and more lately. And yes, they have started to bother me. Mostly because it seems that Lou is charging these people up to 125 dollar (I’ve even read 145 dollars) to talk about the things ‘he’ thinks or believes to be true about Tommy or Buck/Tommy. Basically he’s talking about his own headcanons as an actor. Which again, is fine, because if it helps him to act better, why not?

The problem lies in the fact that some people have started taking Lou’s headcanons for reality. They hear what he says and see it as ‘canon’ because (right now) Buck/Tommy is a canon couple. While it is true that Buck/Tommy is canon, Lou’s headcanons are just that, little fanfictions he made up in his head. It’s a dangerous road to go down, because where does it end? When Buck/Tommy eventually break up, a lot of people will feel misled by him. It won’t be pretty.

So therefore, I’ve decided to never watch any of his cameos. I’m not really interested in his fantasies for the guest character he plays on my favourite show. I’d much rather be focusing on what 911 is actually showing us on our screens. I focus on the nuances and little details that they want us to pick up on.

Sometimes there are small things that seem inconsequential, but turn out to be very important episodes later. Everything matters on television. There are no coincidences. The writers craft the story, every single thing is planned out for the scene, the actors act it out and we watch on in complete fascination. There is no room for a guest actor’s headcanons or fantasies in a prime time show like this.

That being said though, if he truly dismissed Chimney and Hen’s plight under Captain Gerrard as mere ‘teasing’, that is factually wrong. If you go back to watch the scenes in question, there is bigotry, blatant racism and sexism. It makes me wonder if he even remembers the scenes in question. Did he rewatch them before he came back for season 7? We’ll never know.

But it does highlight, once again, that it isn’t smart to give this guy a platform to talk about his personal headcanons. He was always bound to say something dumb that would piss people off at some point. And here we are today, pissed off and annoyed.

I also want to remind everyone that it wasn’t Tommy who is the real ‘hero’ in the story of saving Bathena on the cruise ship. It was Hen Wilson, who had a bad feeling in her gut and decided to follow that feeling. She got the ball rolling, then Chimney jumped to her aide, because he always will. Buck and Eddie decided to join in, without hesitation, because again—they always will. Tommy was merely the helicopter pilot who flew them all in.

By that definition they are all the heroes in this narrative, which is why they all get medals next episode. But it is only Hen who was smart enough to follow her gut. If all the others are ‘heroes’? Hen Wilson is the only ‘big damn hero’.

I do believe Tommy might be sticking around for the beginning of season 8, because I’m not sure there will be enough time to deal with a proper break up in two episodes. Unless Tim surprises me and actually does manage to pull it off.

But yes, someone should just tell him to stop doing those cameos if his character is to carry over to season 8. It’s starting to get a little worrisome at this point. Charging people to talk about your own fantasies for your character, feels a little exploitative.

Whatever happens with him in season 8, ultimately I’m not really worried about Tommy to be honest. Lou’s stint on 911 is coming to an end pretty soon, one way or the other.

Consider this topic closed for me now. I’ve said all I wanted and needed to say. I don’t feel like wasting any more of my time thinking about or writing about this man and his cameos. I’d rather spend my precious fandom time on the things that matter: the amazing people I’ve met, watching the show and crying copious amounts of tears over these characters I’ve come to love so much, theorising and speculating about what might happen in the next episodes and next season, and above all talking about Buddie—my favourite pastime. 😊

#nonnies galore #the sordid tale of a man and his cameos #I'm not tagging certain actors; character names or ships #I have no desire to spend my precious fandom time deleting inconsequential messages in my inbox #911 fandom discourse

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night-lakmen · 1 month

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The art of writing 'confident' fictional women

Making female characters who're supposed to be 'queen bees' and/or popular comes with a great amount of misogyny and internalised competition amongst women.

• The Mary sue.

She's perfect, she's everything. While partying everyday and not studying once in the entire book, she's able to be both the magnet and the nerd who knows everything being taught in the class. All men turn to look at her, all women are envious of her beauty.

Most of such characters are described as having certain particular beauty standards. Beauty is different for different people,and attraction isn't warranted by looks. There's a stark difference between being easy on the eye and attractive.

Such characters are also shown to be either incredibly revealing in clothing in places where they shouldn't be, and are described using adjectives that make you more uncomfortable than enamoured. Most of the time they're said to be 'inspired off IT GIRLS', when being an IT girl says nothing about bringing other women down by saying how they surpass everyone around them.

• The Edgy Bombshell.

The og y/n.

Hair up in a messy bun, wearing the first thing she finds in her room she's still the most beautiful girl in school/class/the entire world. Things that are symptoms of depression become aesthetic for her, the just out of bed look being one of 'not like other girls' and not 'im suffering. Help.'

Such characters are often uplifted by adding bimbo, cheerleader chars who wear clothes/are portrayed to be more extroverted, glittery and cheery than the said character. Un necessary bullying from the girly chars and constant threats of 'you're stealing my boyfriend' ruin her day.

The only thing she needs to steal is a time table.

• The Pseudo bully.

She's not mean, she's just the girl who's honest with everyone.

Even though she's the worst person to walk on earth with the way she talks to people,somehow everyone bows to her word. Similar to the first one, she's somehow liked by everyone. Never a pore, never any body type other than hourglass, she brings her friends down by making weird jokes and putting them out as 'savage' when they're not comebacks, just actual insults.

But she's not a bully! Her behavior is entitled, she thinks she has earned the entire world because of the way she is raised or looks, but she is not a bully!

• The gangster

[I love biker women<3]

She's not like the other basic girls. She knows bikes, she knows cars. Everyone comes to her to get their stuff fixed and she has beef with every other woman in school. It isn't her fault she's one of the boys and was raised with 69 boys!

Most of the time such characters lean heavily towards type 2, having either an excess amount of terrible hygiene, humor, or towards 1.

The only time this is acceptable is when she's lesbian. I love biker women<333!!!

The art of writing fictional women has been around for ages, yet it is one people still haven't figured out yet. Much like in real life, the objectification of women and their bodies to appease the readers is prevalent among writers both male and sadly female. One woman can't be both popular and nice, for that's a sin. Kindness doesn't warrant popularity, for women are always fighting amongst each other in their mind.

Popularity is gained because of a lot of things, and most of them aren't positive things. The only time people end up liking you is if you're aware of other people: and don't put other people down to raise others. Women are much more than their bodies, their beauty, their sexuality. They can have off days, they can have many different kinds of personalities and moods depending on the situation.

The art of writing women is almost like the art of loving women, and it's safe to say that we're failing in both.

#luke castellan smut #writers #writing #writerscommunity #bimbo doll #bimbofied #barbie #percy jackon and the olympians #booklr

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annieqattheperipheral · 1 month

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God you'd think Mitch Marner personally traveled to every Leafs fan's house and kicked their dog and their grandmother before setting their car on fire...

If the delectable minchy marnie actually did all that those leafs twitter "fans" would honestly piss their pants in glee and honour that a real life Leaf-- and one of the best ones ever-- graced them with his leafie presence

And those acts of violence would probably convince them that he had the fortitude to win four entire series singlehandedly.

For my own mental health i keep far away from twitter and toronto hockey media discourse when i hear this kind of chatter is happening, and i hear it's especially cruel rn. Leafs players are right to keep personal media blackouts and i wish the reporters wouldn't bring this shit up to them for their reactions. There's no sense in entertaining any of it.

Especially when we know that it is all rooted in evil shit. That tweeter was correct when they said that mitch marner is the first nhl player ever to experience misogyny. Yes he's a fun loving goofy dude who keeps the dressing room light n buzzing, yes he came into the league a smaller stature, yes we all heard about his dad being an emotional abusive asshole. And in the minds of ye olde hockeymen all those "weaknesses" were crimes worse than professional women hockey players creating their own league.

Ugh.

Anyhow, I'll redirect you to this post, an article from pre game 4. It's in wonderful support of our cool special guy who deserves the world.

i hope mitchy is enjoying his off days with zeus and his wife-- which he mentioned a lot this season and i think bc he tried to portray to all the idiot leaf fans that he's not a shrimpy little kid anymore but a grown adult man. We already know it minchy, we love ya, don't need to prove nothin to us💙

#mitch marner #leafs lb #toronto maple leafs #nhl playoffs 2024 #nhl garbage league #annieQ hockey thoughts

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balkanradfem · 4 days

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I was trying to explain to my friend how all music from our country that is made by m*n is sexist, and was deconstructing the lyrics of some beloved, popular songs from the 90s. She told me I was the only person who would ever find fault in those songs, and acted like I was, in fact, a lunatic for dissecting every little thing to find offense in it. So I thought, you know what, I will bring this to my blog. Let the tumblrinas decide if I'm right.

So I will translate for you, some of our very beloved songs, in order to tell you what I think is wrong with them. If you're croatian, this will be funny, and you are allowed to correct my translation. I don't even hate these, they're incredibly catchy, but the lyrics are driving me insane.

Mary and Kate (youtube link) (1st verse) I thought the life was restaurants and dreams Friends, pretty women, for love to guide me And wherever I went, I didn't care I loved, never asked, through the world I drifted (chorus) Mary and Kate Where are they, to come back? My beautiful little Anne Who did you sleep with tonight? (2nd) I talked a lot, drank a lot, and laughed a lot I did this and that, everything, and always what I wanted And while I drifted, a crazy fool Pretty girls were all snatched by effortless cretins (chorus) (3rd) Where was I, what I was doing, who did I love? I was having fun, never lost my head I am still the same, I am the real one Real m*n goes, gives, never gets spoilt.

I no longer understand These young girls I am real for them They are not the real ones. I no longer understand What do they want? If only women were what they once were. (chorus) Mary and Kate Where are they, to come back? My beautiful little Anne Who did you sleep with tonight?

So you all can probably tell why this pisses me off, the chorus itself is giving me rage, but then the last bit just goes into full misogyny rant about women. It is obvious that this is a bullshit sicko man! He fancies himself as a 'vagabond' who just drifts around, drinks and has sex with women, and while he was young, it was working out for him and he could get young women to sleep with him, and then some time later, women obviously caught on onto the fact that he is a worthless drunk who doesn't do anything but party and bed women, incapable of being faithful or useful to anyone, and they've settled for males who, I would hope, are at least having a job and don't cheat or do alcohol all day. So as a response to that, he has to go and say 'wow women today are not real anymore, what do they want?? I am the real male obviously, m*n can never go bad, but all these women, they are unreal for not wanting me,' and then he proceeds to try and guilt trip MULTIPLE WOMEN AT ONCE for being on a location he doesn't know of, asking who they slept with! It's literally none of his business! He's literally not invested in any of these and will not contribute to their life in any manner except to give them a horrible time and to then proceed to look for his next victim, but they're being depicted as wrong and unreasonable. It's very obvious why no woman would look at him!

It makes me even more concerned that by the end of the song, he's no longer saying 'women', he's saying 'girls', indicating that now that he's older, he's interested in younger female demographic, but then also a verse later he had the GALL to call them 'not real women', if they're also not interested in him. In the end he even goes 'if only women were what they once were', by which he probably means, without any rights to reject him, without legal protection, only that way he could get whatever he would want from them.

My friend told me I'm supposed to just 'not listen to the lyrics' but m*n are listening to these lyrics! And agreeing! And if we're also acting uncritically, they're taking it as a sign that we also agree! A m*n wrote these!! It got mega popular!! And the song itself is so damn catchy it's been playing in my head all damn day. Someone needs to say something!!!!

The second one I want to criticize is considered one of the most beautiful, most romantic songs in our language, and I too will sing it sometimes because the imagery gets to me, but once I fully analyzed the lyrics I could see that something unsavory and messed up is going on in here and I am going to talk about it.

Empress (youtube link) (1st verse) Golden threads of the summer dawn came to her castle to wake up my love. Light shall kiss her face, beautiful as in an empress, while I can't kiss her. Golden net of her body has captured my soul only to throw it back into the sea. Every morning, before dawn I come to her castle, white castle of my penance. (chorus) All of my life, all I wanted was her. To find the way to her heart. All of my life, my body is without her Like flowers without water.

These are all of the lyrics, and on the first glance, it sounds beautiful, he's describing her as royalty, and without any derogatory terms as well, which is not common, thus the romantic notion. But. If you paid attention, there are clues that tell us that this woman is not even remotely interested in him, and he's depicting himself as this deeply pained, suffering man, and he's suffering because of her appearance.

He's depicting an image of a woman who is hidden from him, by a castle, and he can't get close to her – this is probably because she is unwilling to face him, or to come close to him, she's behind a wall for a reason. He even implies he's jealous of the light kissing her face, which is in the area of insane obsessed stalker, and when you read further on, he mentions he actually comes to her castle, BEFORE DAWN, which means she probably doesn't know he's doing it, he is in fact, stalking this woman. He describes her castle as a white castle where his punishment happens – he is punished by what? Her existing?

The only description of this woman we get is the perceived beauty of her, there's never any insight in who she is, anything she does or says that would imply interest, but he feels deeply victimized. 'Golden net of her body has captured my sol', he imagines that her appearance was a trap to capture him, by which we can assume the poor woman never even said anything to him, he just saw her and decided that she is responsible for his feeling, because he likes appearance and feels he should have her. And here also we can see that she doesn't want him, because she 'threw his soul back into the sea', meaning she did not show any interest in him. He goes on to cry about how his body is 'like flowers without water', implying he is withering at the foot of her castle, because she is not showing any interest in sleeping with him, oh the horrors.

This is clearly a stalker song! She probably never even spoke to this man and he doesn't seem to know anything about her, he never ever mentions anything except for her beauty, we don't know what this woman is like, or what she wants, this is not a love song! The only agency this woman is showing is that she's staying hidden in her castle PROBABLY FOR A GOOD REASON, and he keeps stalking her and claiming she's causing him pain. I would freaking move castles.

The only saving grace of this song is that I do hope he withers completely without ever getting a glimpse of her, and that she never even finds out, which I feel is the correct way for him to go, without bothering her.

These are not the only songs I find issue with, I am actually continually mad about many other songs but I will leave it at this for now. Thank you for coming to my music corner where we point things out.

#feminist analysis #radfem analysis #song analysis #songs from 90s #cesarica #mare i kate #misogyny in music #victim blaming women for everything #sexism #croatian sexism

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samwinchesterpregnant · 10 months

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Your opinion on if Sam was a girl but Dean was still a guy, how that would affect the Winchester family dynamics? (Especially between the siblings but I think John's approach would also be important.)

love this question because i think about it every day every night obsessively ummm.. w regards to the family dynamic i feel like jo is one of the only models spn canonically gives of a young, female hunter that also includes some detail of her upbringing. we know that mary was a capable hunter and was raise in the family business, but john doesn’t know this. we know that jo shows a keen interest in hunting, but is often kept at home to work at the bar for “her safety”.

i feel that sam’s canonical role in the series plays well with this dynamic: dean and john are more involved in the physical realm of hunting, training/fighting/etc. girl sam would be (similar to canon sam) much more involved with the research side of things, which may frustrate her more than canon!sam. yes, sam wants to be normal and thinks his upbringing robbed him of a typical life, but also— sam does enjoy hunting! i imagine that girlsam would feel very stifled and annoyed by any restriction placed on her involvement with hunts. although, i will say i think john would be much less restrictive with sam than ellen is with jo. sam is an extremely capable hunter, gender roles be damned, and john is (regardless of intent) known for gambling with the odds occasionally when it comes to his children’s safety (see shtriga episode). but at the same time, any girl-child of john winchester is immediately a mary effigy and he will not lose her twice.

i honestly think dean would be more of the perpetrator of trying to “keep sam out of harms way”, at least when they are in their teens. dean’s look-out-for-sammy disease is already terminal and with added complicated gender dynamics i think his head would probably explode. dean would probably be the one insisting that sam is never out of his sight (mr. the night my brother went to college was the worst night of my life lmao).

i think the biggest difference would be the very real threat of sexual violence (not that sam and dean don’t canonically deal with sexual violence! but just on another level); both on the job and from other hunters. i think this would tip the dynamic slightly in a way that would make sam a lot more sheltered than we see in canon. dean is probably the worst, most annoying older brother. sam is never going on a date, and if she is, dean is literally camped out in the back of the movie theater watching like a hawk. like she is never getting the normal high school experience bless her heart. their bizarre and psychosexual codependency would reach neil jordan borgia levels.

also everything about sam would just be turned up to 10 by misogyny. our salad eating, diet coke drinking, telekinetic, yellow wallpaper, sylvia plath loving, sad girl, rosemarys baby coded, blood-drinking, psychic, getting-groomed-by-demons, #1 live through this by hole fan, baby girl would be fully actualized by girlsam.

#this isn’t meta this is just my twisted ramblings #i love the girl sam of my mind forever<3

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pinksssideblog · 6 months

Text

i had super misogynistic parents. they expected me to cook, clean, and care while my brothers weren't expected to do anything. i was always treated lesser than and was always fighting with my mom because she would get upset over her husband not contributing, but instead of taking it up with him, she questioned why i didn't do it like it was my responsibility. i remember arguing with her and asking her why she treated me like that and she would just respond "you're a girl, you need to get real" and my dad would always justify his abusive and misogynistic treatment of me as him "raising a proper woman"

the reason i bring this up is because today i was waiting in the grocery line and the mom in front of me saw her friend and she told her friend that her sons were in soccer practice and her daughter was helping her shop and then they were going to go home to cook and clean because it was good practice for her future.

this genuienly shocked me so much.

ever since ive entered the void, misogny has not existed. none of my friends are misogynistic, no one in my workplace is misogynistic, and none of the other people are misogynistic either. yk how people talk about women being undermined in the workforce. literally does not exist in my office. ofcourse i hear about all the misogynistic social media influencers but ive always just disregarded that as nonsense and misogyny has just not existed in my life for a while now that it literally shocked me to face it again. it felt like hearing someone say the Earth was flat, it was like "who even thinks that and what is wrong with this person?"

the reason i share this is because, unfortunately, many of you do face misogyny to this day. i promise you, this isn't a "set" social construct. my mom always used to say "no man will want a woman who can't cook and clean, it is literally the job of the wife to do these things" i promise to you, this is a lie. in fact my neighbors a few apartments down are an older couple and the husband does all the cooking. every relationship ive interacted with is equal.

i really want to assure you that a world without misogyny does exist and it is attainable. do not fall for its stupid brainwashing. juat make sure to check yourself of any internalized misogyny and know that you are God.

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viviennelamb · 7 months

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1/2 Vivienne I hope this question is okay. I've enjoyed all of your writing and what you've written about sex specifically. I know you said you are "into women" though you have no interest in sex. I was wondering if you could write a little more about that, specifically what you think of the concept of "internalized homophobia." This is what I hear anytime a same-sex attracted person has anything negative to say about sex in general. I think that is used as a tool of coercion so much.

Even some radfems have very coercive logic about sex. They act like only straight woman should have negative views of sex bc of misogyny, and any other reservations are invalid bc of "trauma" or "internalized homophibia." Some also go out of their way to validate pradatory behavior and male degenerecy when it's gay. When you I read how you think pride is now a psyop to push acceptance of male degenerecy, I felt relief because I've always felt that way but I'm not allowed to think that way.

Yes, I've heard people say that when anybody who's homosexual and has no interest in sex, they have "internalized homophobia." This is one of the billion ways people dismiss each other's experiences to maintain the status quo because they're within the same hivemind and have no individuality. I haven't disliked being lesbian a day in my life, so those people are projecting or have underlying prejudices because there's nothing wrong with being gay in the first place, but everything is wrong about lust. I have the opposite of internalized homophobia: Externalized Homolove. I couldn't disrespect somebody I love dearly by even thinking about them in a lewd manner because the inevitable feelings of jealousy, possession, and paranoia will creep up. If you've heard of couples breaking up because they have to "find themselves," it is because the lust has turned them into a pervert.

Besides the diseases, emotional issues and egotism that come along with the sex-thought and act, I don't and never have seen the appeal of sex. I was one of the few people who supported (real) asexuals and thought they were a little more blessed than everybody else before I understood what I was looking at. I believe everybody wants to be free from lust and sex, but there is nothing opposing it meaningfully so they think lust is something they must engage in to experience love.

Love can only be given and recieved in a pure state of mind and a pure state of mind can only be restored and maintained in an individual who loves God. Seeking love from people who are only capable of lust is a total waste of time, but most people are doing it and blame their lack of prospects on the dating market instead of their lust-obsession.

As for the general concept of internalized homophobia, the False Self thinks there's a "right way to be," which is heterosexual. These individuals typically watch too much media and don't spend enough time with God, who will melt the ego into a puddle. People with prejudices of any sort, whether it's directed at themselves or somebody else (same thing because we're all one), should be avoided because they have a severely limited thinking capacity where they cannot empathize with anything but their own delusion.

God created each soul to represent the infinite nature of Supreme Consciousness, so every person is different, like our fingerprints. The one thing we have in common is seeking happiness, and that feeling is a cosmic call to return to God, not indulging in the fleeting feelings of the world, which cause our suffering. Those who are truly done with the pain of egotism will unceasingly return to Divinity. Sex is always used as a tool of coercion by everybody who is interested in sex, including feminists. I have yet to see a single couple actually like being around each other if it weren't for the limitless sex keeping them together. Every single person who has sex has thinly veiled hatred toward their partner because of their sexual dependence on them, and when they're single, the level of self-hatred they have, even if they are the "happily celibate" types who "haven't had sex in 549 days." Everybody is counting down the days until they can have sex and simultaneously believe they're been freed from lust lol.

Heterosexuals, bisexuals and lesbians become defensive about gay male sex because they see it as an attack on their sex life because they're engaing in the same actions as gay men. I stay far away from anybody who talks about the importance of their kinks and orgasms, regardless of the sexuality they label themselves.

Lustful heterosexual and bisexual women are attracted to gay males, and enjoy seeing males get sodomized similar to how women get sodomized. It's one of the many sexual paraphilias. I noticed a lot of them are into gay cartoon sex because it cleans up their image, but anal sex is one of the most depraved actions one can engage in. It's a sign of filth and mental, emotional, and spiritual death, as it leads to bestiality and child sex abuse - the rock bottom of depravity.

Most people have noticed this and only accuse gay males of it, but every pedophile is into anal sex - not because it's gay but it's because lust makes an individual ravenous for more extreme acts. The sexuality labels are coverups for what is religiously permissable and what isn't. It doesn't matter who one has sex with, the effect on the individual and collective consciousness is the same. A heterosexual couple and homosexual female couple engaging in anal is equally as depraved and are just as likely to abuse children.

What is homophobic is assuming that all gay men have sex and there aren't wonderful gay men who silently love God. There are plenty of them who are cheering my saying anal sex is sinful because they believe it's disgusting to have blood and feces on their dicks or semen in their mouths (like any sane individual). A lot of gay men are completely opposed to putting themselves at risk for disease and are chaste but they don't mention it because everybody hates purity. Those who advocate for how 'good' or 'healing' sex is watches porn (or reads erotica or looks at sexual manga/cartoons); the only difference between sex and porn is the camera that captures the act. The camera makes no difference - a thought and action done in private spreads just the same as a broadcast... you're either on the lust-frequency or not. (And they always "heal" in secret or using incognito browsers... if sex is that great, show it to the world).

Trying to help demons is equally exhausting and depletes your energy so I suggest not helping anybody, joining activist groups or communities; a lot of feminists end up disabled from "helping" which is a divine redirection to their focus on God and live a spiritual life. I urge everybody to not read their content on a regular basis too, do everything in your power to remain in a blissful state because that vitalizes cells and repairs neurons. Only God can help this world and this world will be helped when the majority become pure.

I knew a lesbian separatist who (proudly) had at least 5 orgasms a day and was (unknowingly) completely degenerated because of it. She had a rape kink, understood why males raped women and said that it was okay to be attracted to children because youth is sexually attractive. Her appearance was one of deterioration: receding hairline, dry pale skin and hair, lost 4 teeth, poor bone structure, accelerated aging, sanpaku eyes, poor muscle tone, along with nerve damage and emotional instability that lead to a violent nature. She was 25... the descent into hell is that subtle, not a dramatic fiery one.

This person was only able to think about sex and the end of everything she did was to obtain sensual gratification. She constantly lamented about how she was a traumatized victim of the world she loved so much, but also victimized others in thought as outlined earlier. The vitality draining effects of lust, sex and orgasms is the only occulted information, and you know this is true because you can come across hundreds of thousands of documents about something rare like aliens online, but not more than a few about the negative effects of lust, sex or orgasms which almost everybody engages in daily at least in thought.

She was on the extreme end, but knowing her for that short period of time scared me straight into the arms of God. That experience allowed me to see the effects of lust on everybody though they blame their problems on trauma, disease, aging or lack of medical care all of which lust causes in the first place.

Although I'm lesbian it's impossible for me to be platonically interested in degenerates let alone romantically. I don't care what she identifies as or how compatible we are, she becomes a man when she tells me how disgusting her mind is.

The Divine Romance of adoring God is the highest quality relationship anybody could have and it's the only one I want.

#ask

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is-this-really--life · 9 months

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I sincerely hope one day you can escape from the RadFem cult and learn that you don't have to live your life in fear. It can be hard to recognise propaganda at first but there are resources out there to help you. However, it can't start until you're ready, so until then us good members of society have to run damage control on your awful politics.

Hey. So here's an essay on cult-like thinking from this wonderful reidentified woman and lesbian writer I just discovered:

I don't agree with everything this author says, but I agree with most of it, and I think this perspective is important.

On radical feminism: I found a community to surround myself with that prioritizes women, celebrates our gender nonconformity and critical thinking, and raises awareness about the depths of misogyny and male violence.

I'm not in a cult anymore. I no longer avoid information from sides I disagree with. I regularly engage with ideas that differ from my own. I'm open to changing my mind about things, but I know why I believe what I believe. This was not the case when I was in radical queer spaces.

They regularly misrepresented the beliefs of an entire branch of feminism and the group that closely aligns with it, telling everyone to "block and stay safe" and "you're bigoted if you start to think biological sex (with a diversity of expressions) matters more than gender identity" or even that "Trans women are trans women, and don't share many of the experiences that biological women do as female bodied people."

If you reposted from one of the blacklisted accounts, usually something feminist and nothing to do with trans people, you were a suspect, and you would be dog piled on unless you deleted it. They all began to interpret basic feminist consciousness as a red flag until everyone who didn't listen to radfems stopped posting about feminism altogether. It's a little better now than it was a few years back. But it's still not great.

This attitude is not only found online anymore. There is a group of people who are no longer my friends because I started asking questions and disagreeing with them about the nature of "gender" as a sociological concept, as a social role assigned to the sexes, rather than a highly individual internal feeling and identity that everyone supposedly has. These were the type of people who refused to engage with opinions that differ from their own. These were the people ruled by a fear of stepping out of line. They would cut people off for the smallest perceived missteps. I don't befriend people locked into that cult-like mentality anymore. No matter what end of the political spectrum it comes from.

P.S. I've been talking openly with my normal, very offline cousin about every "radfem" belief I have, including the feminist ones criticizing male violence, and the ones criticizing the very online behavior of the group of people shouting that "sex isn't real" or "isn't overwhelmingly dimorphic" or that "trans people are being genocided in the U.S." or whatever, and she 100% agrees with everything I say. Can you say the same? Or do very offline people get weirded out and concerned when you talk queer orthodoxy bullshit? Just asking.

#radfem #ask #gender critical #heterodoxy

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xxlovelynovaxx · 2 months

Text

It's trans day of visibility and all I can feel is dread.

Because I am intersex nonbinary,

which means the only parts of me that are seen,

are whatever predatory intent can he projected onto me.

I'm both "invisible" (erased) and hypervisible,

which according to anyone who experiences the other

is "privilege" and not yet another form of violence.

Trans people tell me they can "always tell"

that I'm an "afab trying to invade women's spaces"

or "basically a cis man playing at femininity,

trying to invade femme spaces";

there are no spaces for me.

"Make your own and be alone" -

it matters not that I am trans woman and trans man -

the one taints the other and makes me neither;

for all that the two are treated like oil and water,

I am treated like sludge.

"TME doesn't reduce you to your sex" is cried,

while they scrutinize me for signs

of being "male intersex" or "female intersex",

"you probably just have PCOS" -

y'know, the well-accepted intersex variation

that causes hyperandrogeny

to the point of even affecting your genitalia,

and which has recently been discovered to occur

in people without ovaries

(or any of the other sex characteristics

typically associated with presence of ovaries

in dyadic people)?

And all for what?

To tell me I haven't experienced my own experiences,

and am wrong about them,

and that actually they weren't that bad,

because they must be "misdirected" -

because I must be the "wrong sex"

to have experienced them.

Believe trans women,

unless there's literally any reason you can come up with,

that we are predatory liars

invading real women's spaces.

That's fighting transmisogyny, dontcha know?

And always remember that trans men

are hysterical whiny men's rights activists

cuntboys and bitches who wanna be oppressed so badly

who have never experienced misogyny a day in our life

and always pass as soon as we first think about wearing a binder

because there famously aren't surgeries

to get rid of two very obvious things

front and center

that T can't change

Remember it's also fighting transmisogyny

to joke about raping specific people

who explictly haven't consented to it

and then claim

that it's transmisogyny to judge trans women

for a cnc kink.

Don't believe multigender trans women,

masc trans women, butch trans women,

AMAB transmascs and AMAB nonbinary people,

AFAB trans people, trans "transandrophobia truthers",

trans people of color, disabled trans people...

Hm, actually, there's an easier way of saying this.

Believe skinny white gender conforming trans women

with large active follower counts

that act as harassers on call

to enforce the party line

(what happened to acab?)

and no one else.

If you can't enforce acknowledgement of your pain,

you don't get any.

Apparently, it's a limited resource.

And any joy you take -

from being a man,

or a femboy,

or a nonbinary person,

or a woman if you do it the wrong way,

or a trans person in general

is a threat,

and a transmisogynistic one at that.

All while you speak over trans people

of every gender

and especially trans women

telling you "no the fuck it's not, you transphobe".

Oh and degendering is a real problem,

but if you ever call someone a person

because they only have their pronouns in bio

and pronouns≠gender,

remember that it's transphobia to not extrapolate

binary gender from binary pronouns.

Never mind all the nonbinary people you know

who use she/her, he/him, and she/him.

It's not transphobia to assume they're

basically cis women (dangerous),

cis men (dangerous),

trans men (dangerous)

or trans women (dangerous).

Obviously nonbinary identity is disingenous,

and doesn't really exist,

but that's not transmedicalism

because transmedicalism is a Bad Word!

Anyway, always call trans people "women" and "men"

even if you don't know,

because it's (trans)misogyny

to call (trans) women people.

(It's also "general transphobia" to call trans men people,

but also if they're upset about it

it's just fragile toxic masculinity,

and really everyone should be okay being perceived

as feminine and as women,

because why would anyone choose to be a MAN anyway?)

A bunch of radfems

with all the gender essentialism that goes with it,

that simply decided that women were the one with penises,

but that testosterone is still evil,

never mind non-transitioning and post-op trans women.

Insert required disclaimer:

Y'all are doing this, regardless of gender.

If you think calling out how you mistreat:

trans women, trans men, and nonbinary people,

is blaming trans women,

I think maybe you're desperately avoiding the conversation.

Anyway, I don't want to be visible,

on trans day of visibility,

because visibility without acceptance

just begets violence.

#poetry #my poetry #trans day of visibility #trans #if you think you know my agab no you don't #and if you don't like this poem then do us both a favor and block me #I know posting this on tumblr dot hell will probably invite harassment #bc so many of y'all are like 'how dare you talk about having a different bad experience than me in your own house'#if it bothers you get off my blog! jesus!#(the above are necessary disclaimers. they cut down on harassment by like 80 percent fr)#anyway ah yes harassing a disabled trans person for sharing a poem with faer couple hundred followers on tdov is activism #congrats sweetie you did an activism here's a brown star for the shitty job of it

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limeade-l3sbian · 3 months

Note

i read the anti-porn masterpost that you reblogged. it disgusts me so much and i can’t stop thinking about it. i want to ask, how do you keep your head up in the midst of all this? how am i supposed to keep going out in public and interacting with the world whilst knowing that most of the men i see are the same men who are watching horrific pornography in private? how am i supposed to exist when i know the men around me don’t see me as human?

Lately I’ve been feeling that pornography and rape culture is so widely accepted that there’s no point in fighting it. Men are violent and perverted by nature and that will never change. I don’t want to exist in this world as a woman. I don’t want to live when so many people around me see me as subhuman.

I’ve been feeling so hopeless. I apologize for venting in your ask box; your blog just feels like a safe space to express these things. I don’t know how to cope and I need help.

No need to apologize. :) I tell people, unless I say otherwise, my ask box is a place to say literally any thought or vent that comes to mind.

It's hard for me to give proper advice about this. Just simply because other than one male at my job, I literally do not interact with me anymore. I cut my dad off and have never been close with other male relatives in my family, so...life has kind of been going on per usual for me. I work almost exclusively with women, I live with a female relative, all of my friends are female, etc..

I also can't give you the best advice on suicide ideation, since I suffer from it myself. It is important to me that when people ask me for advice, I am completely honest with them about what advice actually helps me and if it helped me long term or short term. I never want to give you empty promises that "it's all going to be okay!" etc.. Because sometimes, that isn't the case.

I take my strength from the women I interact with. Online and in my real day to day life. I garner my hope seeing women start to really peak and ask questions and make criticisms about men without feeling like they have to qualify their righteous anger.

I can't magically wish or pray away misogyny. I can't promise you that even in your lifetime, you will see momentous change in the way women view themselves and how they fight back against men. What i can tell you is that hope and happiness, in such a situation, come from community. Your fellow woman. You said: how am i supposed to keep going out in public and interacting with the world whilst knowing that most of the men i see are the same men who are watching horrific pornography in private?

You keep going out and living because that in and of itself is defiance. Not allowing the fear and anger of oppression to keep you huddled in a corner is what let's them know who you are. Going out and living is what let's other women who have been trapped or feel trapped in fear know that life can continue. The prevalence of porn and rape culture is a reaction to women's growing consciousness.

You shouldn't give up because people, like me, care about you. I say this all the time and I hope every anon that I've ever said this to knows that I mean it: now that I know you exist? You matter to me. You mattered to me before, just as a person. But now that i know that YOU specifically, exist and felt trusting enough to give me this burden that's been weighing down your heart, I trust you to know that your presence in this world will NEVER be dictated by the porn-influenced and misogyny-ingrained whims and demands of men.

You're a woman who is reacting to the oppression around her, as any woman would. And you have to see it through, with me, because once every voice of defiance gets snuffed out, the voices of oppressors are no longer hindered.

#ask

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zeroducks-2 · 9 months

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Freedom of speech but not freedom from consequences. Anti-censorship but we still don’t want to platform bigots 🫤 Coming from a neutral party, I think you could learn a lot from listening to all perspectives to avoid echo chambers. Form your own opinion instead of following a crowd. My opinion? Hate the person, not the ship. Don’t judge a book by it’s cover, but that is what the book cover is made for. I think it’s healthier if you and everyone else stopped trying to be antagonistic? How are you supposed to spread positivity if you’re always on the verge of angry ranting?

Okay I'm going to try and answer for the sake of the people who might read this kind of bs in their inboxes and be affected negatively by it, and maybe even feel like they're being unfair towards the very bullies which spend their energies harassing and insulting (and sometimes also doxxing and suicide bating) us.

Let's break this down.

1. "freedom of speech but not freedom from consequences" I can't even talk about some dark themes in fiction or my own personal history of real life abuse without getting termed here. Erotic art can't be posted almost anywhere at this point, and not just the kind antis dislike. Freedom is a construct on social media because ultimately these spaces are owned by someone, and you'll be kicked out if they don't like you.

2 "we don't want to platform bigots" no, absolutely we don't. Historically, giving a platform to bigots and hatemongers fosters hate, violence and censorship. Also I have no power to platform or deplatform anyone, I'm just a guy on tumblr, so I don't even know what you're on about with this. If I had the power to decide, trust me that I would kick the terfs the fuck out of here anyways. And also the cowards who hide under the anon cover to send hate and threats.

3 "listen to perspectives and avoid echo chambers" I'm over 30 and I've been a kinkster for most of my life. I'm queer. Among other things, history and queer history are in my field of studies. I didn't form my opinion here, I came here with one already. I listened to all the perspectives you might think of also because I was here when the rise of censorship and puritanism happened, and by the way you know who got deplatformed? The kinkster and the artists, surely not the bigots. I don't think I've ever seen an instance of an anti being blocked or termed for harassment, whereas blogs get blocked every day for having NSFW content.

4 "form your own opinion instead of following a crowd" again, do you really think I existed as a blank slate before creating this blog?

5 "my opinion is(...)" You sound like a Christian preacher and it gives me the heebiejeebies.

6 "it's healthier if you stopped trying to be antagonistic" sweetheart, we are being bullied every day. If you're someone who creates erotic art of any kind you're subjected to a ton of harassment, and if you create something which could be considered problematic, you get death threats. Suibating. Insults lathered with misogyny, transphobia, queerphobia, you get treated like a freak of nature and threatened to have your livelihood taken away. Or threats of doxxing and of deplatforming. And you might very well get your blog shut down. I'm going to stop being antagonistic when I'll stop being antagonized, and if you think that said bullying is justified and I should just suck it up - and I say this in the most antagonistic way possible - fuck off. Not one single ship or one single fictional character is worth the harassment of another human being.

7 "how are you supposed to spread positivity of you're always on the verge of angry ranting" What makes you think I want to spread postivity? No like, honestly. What makes you think that my purpose with this blog is that. I'm here to talk about my blorbos, and if this makes someone happy then good for them. If the fact that I'm opinionated and passionate about things bothers you, no one is forcing you to stay.

Your whole thing is a mix of victim blaming and fake neutrality which is not welcome on my blog. Please block me and go on with your life, I'm not interested in your empty platitudes.

To anyone else who's reading this, don't ever feel guilty for defending yourself and for fighting back against oppressive measures. There is never a good reason for harassment, and if you were subjected to it, it's in your right to be angry. No matter what p r o b l e m a t i c ship you posted about.

#Anon hate #Long post #'hate the person not the ship' dude what the fuck #Dislike the ship and block the tag. Don't fucking hate anyone #Weirdo

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