#i just feel like i betrayed our entire friendship because i went and caught feelings | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

fatiguing-thoughts · 3 years

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Feelings Change - Embry Call x Reader

Request: “Hey, since you don't feel comfortable writing about the poly imprinting thing the other anon suggested, I have an idea based on what they said that maybe you could write instead. So instead of the reader imprinting on both, a reaction type of thing for when the reader had a crush on one, but falls in love with the other with time. If it is preference style, you can get to show both situations (crush on Embry, but falls for Paul later and vice versa)”

This is crush on Paul -> love Embry

the Embry -> Paul one should be up in the next day or so

Having a crush on your best friend was never easy. But when your best friend was Paul Lahote-- things were unbearably difficult.

Every girl wanted him, he had a bit of a temper sometimes, though it was never towards me, and he simply was just what I wasn’t. He was fun, beautiful, and desirable.

I knew one thing for certain, while I couldn’t be with Paul romantically, I knew he’d be there at the very least as my best friend. It was us against the world.

Though our friendship grew as we did, we went from inseparable children to awkward middle school kids, blossoming out some more, and then to high school kids who began to have other friends. Though, we were always each other’s number one. We just had different priorities.

Paul loved the attention he got from girls, girls that knew nothing about him. They simply knew what he looked like, they didn’t know the struggles he had, the emotions he felt, and the way his lip twitches right before he bursts out laughing. No, they never got to hold his shoulders as he cried about his home life. So no, they didn’t know Paul.

And I knew for damn sure that Paul didn’t know them. No, he only knew their faces, their physical appearances. He didn’t know their favorite snacks, what kept them up at night, and he didn’t know their struggles like he grew to know mine over the years. He never held them while they cried in his arms. No, he never stayed up all night to do stupid shit they shouldn’t have been, or maybe not in the same way we did.

However, I grew to accept that my feelings towards Paul were not going to be reciprocated. I learned that I would merely be his best friend, and that was enough for me. He was such a light in my life that I couldn’t allow myself to lose it.

So I began opening my options to other guys, which did not really end well in my favor. In fact, it kinda blew up in my face when Chase Logan screwed me over. I should’ve known not to trust someone who had two first names as their full name, though. My bad, I guess. It ended poorly when I caught him cheating on me with Chelsea Herrin. While I was never in love with him, it still hurt. It hurt to be betrayed. Paul proceeded to beat the shit out of him, picking up the pieces as always. Not entirely helping the issue of me getting over him, though I had accepted we would always be platonically bound, and nothing more.

Paul grew closer to some of his guy friends, inviting me to group hangouts. I grew to really love his friends. We had more fun than I could’ve ever imagined. Slowly but surely, they all accepted me into their group. Even if Paul wasn’t there, I would still get an invite from at least one of them.

Quil, Jacob, Jared, and Embry. We were all in the same grade, though I never talked to them much before Paul formally brought me into their group.

As the months went on, I found Embry to be someone who gave me feelings of butterflies. He was someone who brought that excitement into me, the one that only Paul was previously able to do. His sweet laugh, his attention to detail and blatant regard for my happiness, my comfort. I found peace within this new group of friends, within Embry.

Suddenly, I was no longer pining over my best friend. I grew more and more interested in the blooming contact Embry and I had. I was finally able to listen to Paul talk about girls, supporting him genuinely as opposed to faking it, and dwelling in my sorrows later. No, now I felt fireworks when Embry was around.

And one day, Jared got sick and disappeared for weeks. He said it was mono, but when it was time that he was better he wouldn’t even look in our direction. None of us knew what to make of it, other than that he had joined Sam Uley. It devastated all of us, especially Paul. He was destroyed at the betrayal, the sudden loss of his friend.

I comforted him, but it didn’t feel like when I used to. I felt no more romantic feelings, I didn’t hope to kiss his lips anymore.

No, it was Embry’s soft lips that I pined after. Those were the eyes that kept me up at night, plaguing my mind. His soft face, calloused hands were the ones invading my dreams, now.

Embry’s soft gaze fell upon me often, sending shivers up my spine. He was always making sure I was okay, always watching my body language to see how I was doing.

“Are you cold?” His chocolate brown eyes burned into mine, watching how I hugged myself in Jake’s garage as we were working on a car.

“A little bit.” I nod.

“Here, take this.” He takes his hoodie off, his shirt slightly getting caught-- giving you a peek at his abdomen.

A blush creeps upon your face as he hands it over to you, a goofy grin plastered on his face. Quil and Embry stifle a laugh, as Paul still didn’t show up to the hangout for the night.

The next half an hour was spent chatting, watching as they all worked on the rabbit. Embry getting closer and closer to you, slowly easing himself into your personal bubble. It was apparent to anyone with eyes that there was something between you two, but both of you were shy... awkward, even.

Paul comes in, in the off mood he had been in for the last week or two.

“Hey Paul.” I smile, happy to see my best friend.

“Hi.” His voice was sharp, impatient.

It threw me off, no matter how much Paul has been snippy and temperamental with others, he was never like this with me.

I was taken aback, almost flinched at his harsh tone, Embry noticed and rubbed a small circle on the back of my hand with his thumb. I was instantly calmed, though still upset.

“What’s wrong, Paul? Do you want to talk?” I ask, voice meek.

Everyone’s eyes fell to us, wondering what was causing Paul to be so hostile with me.

“No, I don’t know what’s wrong.” He hissed. “I just... I’m so angry.”

And he was, he was fuming. I could see it from here.

“We’ll take a step outside, we’ll get some fresh air.” I offer, standing up.

“No. I want to hang out, just like we do every week.” He looks at me with hard eyes.

“Okay, we can do that.” I nod, meeting Jacob’s concerned gaze.

Paul trudges over, sitting on the other side of me. Heat was radiating off of him.

“Paul, are you sick?” I ask, touching his arm, then moving the back of my hand to his forehead.

“I don’t know what’s going on.” He scoffs, taking my hand off his forehead and putting it back on my lap.

“Paul, you’re burning up. You definitely have a fever.” Worry was evident in my voice.

“(Y/N), stop worrying. You’re just making it worse.” He huffs, rubbing his temples.

“I-I’m sorry, Paul. I just want to make sure you’re okay.”

“Do you? Because ever since Embry and you started messing around, you don’t seem to be acting like the best friend you always were.” He hisses.

It felt like someone stabbed me in the gut, twisting the knife. The air was knocked out of me.

“What?” I ask, shock evident in my voice.

“Paul, we aren’t messing around.” Embry corrects him.

“Oh shut up, Call. I’m talking to (Y/N).” Paul seethes.

“Paul, I still care about you as much as I always did. I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I stutter, tears brimming my eyes.

“Oh, so you sneaking around with Embry is what you used to do? We used to hang out and do stupid shit, and now you’re perfectly fine doing that with Embry instead. You don’t want to see me anymore.”

“Yes, I do. You’re too busy brooding, you haven’t been coming around. You’ve been acting... different. You’re not acting like you, Paul. You’d never talk to me like this.” I choke.

“Well, maybe it’s because my best friend isn’t my best friend anymore.” He seethes.

And there it went, my heart shattered into a million pieces. My stomach fell into my feet, and my chest clenched. I almost fell over, but Embry steadied me.

“Paul, you need to calm down.” Jacob stands up, walking over.

“Don’t tell me to calm down!” He spits.

I was in disbelief as to what was unfolding before my eyes. I had never seen Paul this angry. This wasn’t my Paul, this was not Paul.

“Paul, please.” I beg, tears threatening to spill.

His eyes almost softened, but rage was far in too much control of him. I didn’t even recognize him.

I placed a hand on his elbow, trying to comfort him. He snapped his arm away faster than I thought possible. Tears stung my eyes.

“Don’t touch me.” He warns, his body beginning to shake with anger.

“Paul, get out of here.” Jacob yells.

Quil begins to make his way over closer to me, worried Paul was going to hurt me.

Hell, even I began to almost worry about it.

“Paul, go home.” Embry instructs.

“Don’t tell me what to do, Call.” His shaking grew faster, his entire body almost vibrating.

"Paul?” I ask, a tear running down my cheek.

He looks over at me, realizing what was actually going on.

“I-I’m so sorry. I don’t know.” Paul whispers to me, running out of the garage.

I sat there, filled with shock. I was overwhelmed, trembling. I didn’t know who that was, but that wasn’t Paul. No, it couldn’t be Paul.

Embry’s hand rubbed comforting circles on my back as Jacob and I exchanged worried glances. Quil came and sat on my other side.

“What the hell was that?” Quil asks in disbelief.

“I don’t know.” I look down at my hands in my lap, leaving them where Paul threw them.

A large thumb wiped a tear from my face, it was Embry.

And that was the last I had seen of Paul for weeks.

Embry was with me, picking up the pieces that I was left in. He was patient, understanding, and comforting. He showed me the love I knew I needed, the love I always wanted. I fell so hard for Embry, I really did.

I loved the way his hand held mine, how his hands fell on my waist or lower back, how we snuggled on the couch. I appreciated his presence, we all were so close. We hung out every day, usually joined by Jacob and Quil.

Embry wiped my tears, he held me when my body shook with sobs. He was the rock I needed, until I no longer cried. He kissed me with his warm, soft lips. He held me like I was a piece of glass. He looked at me like I was the light in the middle of a dark field. Embry’s arms were my new home, Embry was the pure bliss in my life.

I accepted what was, because that wasn’t Paul.

My best friend Paul wouldn’t do that. But he did, and he was with Jared and Sam now, leaving me confused beyond words. I still didn’t understand it, I don’t believe any of it.

I still hung out with Jacob, Embry, and Quil daily. Having fun and trying to make out as best as we could under the circumstances, though something we couldn’t ignore begin to grow.

It wasn’t until recently that Embry began to have a raging fever, growing more testy. His soft and subtle features growing a bit harsher. He was getting angry at seemingly nothing. I was worried, watching my now boyfriend head down the same path that Jared and Paul took-- leaving me sitting here guessing if and when Embry would do the same.

Quil and Jake knew my fears, as they worried for the same thing. Embry had grown to act harsher than I had ever seen. He snapped at Quil for hugging me, snapped at Jacob for getting too close, and snapped at me for being careless.

This wasn’t Embry. No, this was not my Embry.

We all awaited the inevitable, Embry soon fell sick with mono, too. Just like Paul and Jared.

I longed for his hands holding mine, his body cuddling into mine. I needed to hear his laugh.

I needed to be near him, I needed to know what was happening. If he would leave like the rest.

Quil and Jake tried to be strong for me, but it was useless.

The two most important people in the world to me were gone.

Disappeared without a trace.

I couldn’t handle it, I couldn’t handle the unknown.

I had to talk to Embry, I needed to know where my boyfriend and I stood.

Though, like Jared and Paul, he avoided us like the plague.

“(Y/N), maybe we shouldn’t be doing this.” Quil says sadly, looking into my teary eyes as I told him about my plan to confront Embry.

Or Paul. Or both.

I needed answers, and I would not let Quil, Jacob, or anyone stop me.

“Quil, I’m going. You can come or don’t but I am not sitting and waiting around. Jacob starting getting sick, too. Something’s going on. I’m going to find out.” I whisper, returning his pleading gaze.

“I can’t, (Y/N).” He whispers.

“I’ll come back with answers, then.” I nod, leaving his house.

I got in my car, speeding off.

I knew that I wouldn’t find them at their own houses, but at Sam Uley’s.

I would show up and demand answers.

When I pulled up to the house, I saw a group of four men walking towards it.

Embry, Paul, Jared, and Sam.

I get out of my car, slamming my door shut, causing them to turn in my direction. Immediately after, Embry and Paul turn back around, letting Jared and Sam handle it.

“Hey, remember me? Or did you forget?” I yell, pushing through the two men blocking me from my previous best friend and possible boyfriend.

“(Y/N), please. You should go.” Sam looks at me with stern eyes.

“No! I’ve come here for answers. You took my friend, my best friend, and then my boyfriend! And now Jake’s acting weird, then you’re gonna take Quil, too! You’re taking everyone that matters to me, you’re leaving me alone to rot.” I huff.

“(Y/N)-” Jared begins, but I cut him off.

“No, you listen to me! I’m not stupid. I know that what’s going on isn’t normal, this isn’t how people cut people off-- you don’t get sick. There’s something you’re not telling me! And you two assholes won’t even look at my face!” I was enraged at this point, no desire of holding back.

“(Y/N), please leave.” Paul’s soft voice begs me, as I stare at his back.

“Fuck you, Paul! You yelled at me, you were so mean before you left? And now you can’t even look me in the eye to tell me to leave? Grow up and turn around before I do it myself!”

“(Y/N), you can’t do that. Go home.” Sam instructs.

“No, not until they talk to me. I’m not stupid, this is bigger than what the rumors are. This is bigger than what you’re telling me.” I seethe.

I push my way through Sam and Jared’s hard bodies, adrenaline pumping through me. They didn’t expect me to actually do it.

I grab Paul’s arm, and try to spin him around but his feet were firmly planted to the ground.

“Paul, look at me right now.” I hiss.

He hesitates, so I try to turn him again.

His swollen eyes met mine, worry plastered on his face.

“You were my best friend, us against the world remember? This isn’t you!” I choke, watching as his face fell with pain.

“And you.” I turn to Embry.

“What the hell? You were there for me, we talked about it all, we cried together. Why the hell are you here, too? Huh? Deciding that upping and leaving me was cool? You said you loved me, I meant it! This isn’t you, either...” Tears brimmed my eyes as I waited for him to look at me, but he didn’t want to.

“(Y/N)...” Embry chokes.

“No, turn around and talk to me!” I try to pull him to face me.

But when I do and our eyes meet, I felt all the air leave my lungs. A pressure fell around my entire body, though it was peaceful. Suddenly, I felt like I was breathing air differently.

Embry’s face fell into one of pure serenity, his mouth hanging slightly agape while his soft, swollen eyes bored into mine.

“I’m so sorry.” He exhales, pulling me hard into his chest.

“No, no. I need an explanation, now.” I choke out, forcing myself to struggle against his hold, backing out of his arms.

“Well, now we can finally tell you.” Paul sighs in relief.

“Now? Now you can?” I glare at him.

“Please, just be open minded. You won’t believe us.” Sam sighs.

“I’m listening, because none of this made sense to me.” I look between everyone’s faces. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“Okay, so shifting. You shift into a giant wolf. All of you.” I look around at all their faces, sitting at the table next to Sam’s fiancé Emily.

“Yes.” Embry nods, placing a hand onto mine.

“Listen, I’m gonna need some proof here. I know that you just gave me the entire rundown, which was very elaborate might I add, Sam. But, I just... Come on, you expect me to believe you guys phase into wolves and that vampires exist?” I scoff, looking between them all.

“Alright.” Paul nods.

“Show me, then.” I raise my eyebrow.

Embry and Paul slowly stand up from the table, making their way outside. We all follow. They begin to strip down and I cover my eyes.

“Keep your eyes open, or you won’t believe us.” Jared mumbles, giving me a pat on the back.

I move my hands, covering up their lower halves, though finally observing how much more massive they both got. How was that even possible?

Then, they’re both once again seemingly vibrating out of their skin. But as they look as if they were about to burst out of their skin, they do. They turn into massive wolves, five times their size. I almost fell on my ass, but Jared caught me, a chuckle escaping his lips.

My eyes widen as the wolves bow their heads, causing me to walk over.

“Alright, sick. So my boyfriend and best friend left me because they turn into wolves and fight vampires. And the rest of my friends will, too? But now I can’t talk to them until they do because I know about this? And nobody was going to tell me for what reason?” I ask, looking at Sam.

“These are tribal secrets, nobody that isn’t a wolf or an imprint is allowed to know.” Sam nods, a whine escaping Embry’s lips.

I turn around, running my fingers through his soft, silver fur. Amazed at how enormous they were.

“Well, I don’t know what an imprint is but I am definitely not a wolf. So what made you change your mind and tell me? My solid determination?” I look back.

“I think that’s a conversation you need to have with Embry.” Sam nods, looking at Embry.

“Oh?” I turn back to where I was petting.

“Okay, well turn back into you and talk to me, please.” I ask, turning around to avoid seeing either of them naked.

“You’re taking this really well.” Emily smiles softly.

“Well, why not? I still care about them all the same. Even though I’m still mad about getting blown off, I get it now. I knew there was something wrong with them.” I shrug.

“Great, another human with way too much comfort in the supernatural world.” Sam chuckles, causing me to raise an eyebrow.

“Bella Swan is dating a vampire. Story for another time.” Jared shrugs.

“Got it.”

After I hear shifting of bones and shuffling of people and clothing.

“Hey.” Embry’s awkward voice echoes next to my ear.

“Hi, Em.” I press my lips together.

“Well, we’ll leave you to it. But now we can be friends again, so I’ll see you later.” Paul says, slapping my shoulder and jogging over to Sam, Emily, and Jared as they walked back into the house.

“Well, I guess that’s my cue.” Embry awkwardly fiddles his thumbs.

“Yes, it is. So what’s going on?” I ask, looking up into those chocolate brown eyes I loved.

“Okay, so just hear me out completely before you say anything, okay?”

“Okay.”

“So, imprinting. It’s like gravity is no longer holding you to the Earth anymore, it’s them. You have a whole new center, someone else is holding you down. They’re your world, they matter more than anything. You’d give anything, be anything... for them. Whether that’s a friend, protector, lover... it doesn’t matter. Just being near them is heavenly. But, they hold the reins... they get to decide how the relationship is. Everything is their choice, their pace, their decisions. It’s unconditional love. It happens when your eyes meet the first time after phasing, some would say it’s like love at first sight-- but it doesn’t always have to be romantic. It’s a soulmate, platonically or romantically. But they’re to be protected, honored no matter what.” His rambling was ongoing, but all I immediately thought about was how much he knew of what it felt like.

“Wow... Embry, did you imprint?” I ask, voice trembling.

“I did.” His eyes met mine, causing my heart to jump.

Both in excitement and in fear. I felt tears brimming my eyes.

“Are you happy about it?”

“I am, I’m relieved. But I don’t know how it’ll go yet, I wasn’t exactly given an answer, yet.” He smiles softly at me, reaching a hand out to mine.

“Embry...” I choke. “Do you love her?”

“Wait, (Y/N). Do you think... No I imprinted on you.”

My stomach dropped, both in relief but also with nerves.

“Wait, it’s me?” I ask, unable to prevent a small smile from forming on my face.

“Yes, I thought that much was obvious. Sorry I didn’t clarify.”

“No, no it’s okay.”

“So, what’re your thoughts on it?” He looks at me with pleading eyes.

“Well, this is a lot, Embry. I need some time to process this all, but I want us to be what we were. I love you, and you always felt like home. But I need to relax tonight. I need to go home and think.” I look up at his chocolate brown eyes.

“That’s okay, you should take time to process it. Just know, I’ll never hurt you, and that I’ll never let anything happen to you. I love you, (Y/N).” He smiles, happy with my response.

“Thank you, Em.” I hug him, burying my face in his neck as he lifts me up.

Now just to wait for Jacob and Quil to join and forgive me for disappearing. ________________________________ Word Count: 3925

#embry call #embry call imagine #embry call x reader #paul lahote #paul lahote x reader #quil ateara #jacob black #leah clearwater #seth clearwater #jared cameron #sam uley #twilight

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hurricaneonanesthesia · 3 years

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Loss of a Hero

Hi, Admin Anesthesia here :). I’m so sad. Still crying over Tommy. Based on this. There's also a reference to the wonderful song letter to a dead friend by Precious Jewel Amor.

——————–

Summary: After Dream kills Tommy, Sam tells everyone. How will all of them deal with the loss of a hero?

Trigger Warnings: Implied Suicide, Spoilers, Death

Content Warnings: Swearing

——————–

Sam was pacing around the prison area as he tried to look for the woman.

“Sam...you okay?” Puffy asked as she appeared behind him with worried eyes.

Sam jumped before sighing and nodding, “Puffy...I’m sorry.”

“What are you sorry about?”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” He continued to mutter.

“Sam, what happened?”

“I failed him. I promised that I’d protect him and I didn’t. I waved off the idea because I didn’t think he was capable.”

“Sam?” Puffy asked, fearing the worst.

“He’s dead, Puffy. Dream killed him because I didn’t want to kill Dream.” Sam couldn’t look Puffy in the eyes, “I’m sorry...I know I promised I’d protect him.”

“Tommy?” Puffy’s voice was a whisper, not wanting to confirm the truth.

Sam’s little nod made Puffy’s heart sink. “Oh...Sam, you couldn’t have known.”

“But I did. I could’ve stopped it.” Sam finally faced Puffy, tears streaming down his face, “I’m sorry, Puffy. He was just a kid.”

“I know, I know,” Puffy replied, pulling Sam into a hug as her tears started to come down as well.

-----------------

Sapnap first heard about Tommy’s death when he was talking with Quackity.

“Hey, babe.” Sapnap smiled, kissing the top of Quackity’s head. He thought Quackity was praying because Quackity was kneeling down, but upon closer inspection, he knew that wasn’t the case.

“Hey, Sapnap.” Quackity gave a small smile to his fiance as he looked up at him. Quackity’s face was strewn with tears.

“What’s wrong?” Sapnap’s face immediately melted into worry, “Who hurt you? I can-”

“Tommy died.”

“Wait...what?” Sapnap’s worry turned into denial, “It can’t be. Dream didn’t have any weapons. Tommy could easily fight back.”

“He was just a child. He was my friend.”

“He...couldn’t have died. Tell me you’re joking….please.”

“Sam told us this morning. Dream beat him to death. That sick fuck even looked happy about it.”

Sapnap didn’t like Tommy that well, but the few times they got along, Tommy was a good teammate. He was just a kid. He had so much to experience still.

Tommy reminded him a lot of his younger self. Aspiring to be more than fate wrote him. So when he felt something roll down his cheek, he knew he was grieving for the boy that could’ve been so much more. The boy who would have achieved a lot more than Sapnap did.

“I have to go do something.” Sapnap muttered as he walked away, “Dream...what did you do? I told you not to do anything bad, and here you are, wishing for your death.”

-----------------

Tubbo didn’t believe that Tommy was dead. Why should he?

Sam had told Tubbo that he was alive and well the day before. The last time he thought Tommy was dead, he ended up being alive and well. Sam was probably just trolling with him. Besides...

Dream didn’t have the balls to do this.

Tubbo, at least, thought this until he had gotten Tommy’s compass from Sam.

“I think Tommy would’ve wanted you to have this,” Sam whispered as he gave the compass to Tubbo.

Tubbo’s smile faded as he pulled out his own. The compass was spinning nonstop and it didn’t land on Tommy’s anymore. It was broken.

“Sam...Sam...why is it doing that?”

“Doing what, Tubbo?”

“Ghostbur gave it to me. He said that it pointed to Tommy’s compass. Theoretically, it should still work, right?” Tubbo asked, “Tommy’s not dead. He isn’t! How could he be? Dream’s never defeated him before.”

“Tubbo... I don’t know if you want me to answer that.” Sam looked regretful.

“Please...tell me.”

“They were bound to your souls. Once one of you die, it breaks because it has nothing to bound to anymore.”

Then a heavy feeling was placed on his shoulders as he realized that his best friend was gone. And he never got to say goodbye to him.

He was too busy trying to compete against the Big Innit Hotel and goofing off with Ranboo that….he didn’t pay enough attention to Tommy.

Tommy told him that he was going to face his abuser one last time. Tubbo was so proud of him. Sam told him that Tommy was stuck in the prison with Dream. That was fine, Tubbo knew that Tommy could fight through it. After all, it was only one week.

Tubbo thought that Sam was joking when he said that Tommy was dead.

“Sam….I never got to say goodbye to him.” Tubbo whispered as he crumbled to the ground, looking at his broken compasses.

“I know.” Sam sighed, “I’m so sorry. It’s all my fault. I should’ve protected him from Dream. I’m sorry.”

Why wasn’t he crying? His best friend just died. Did he not care enough? Why did he feel so insensitive?

“Tubbo?” Sam asked as he knelt down beside the shaking boy.

“Sam, why am I not crying? He was my best friend and I don’t even care about it. Why am I not crying?”

“Tubbo, you don’t have to cry to show that you’re grieving. You’re just a boy still. Just...come here.”

Sam pulled him into a hug and that’s when Tubbo felt his tears come out.

“He’s gone. I was supposed to be there for him when he got out. And he’s gone.”

“He died protecting you.”

“WHAT?” Tubbo asked, standing up.

“Dream threatened Tommy that he’d kill you if he got out, and Tommy died to his hands, telling him that he’d never lay a hand on you.”

Tubbo felt everything rush to his head. It was all too much. How could he? How could Dream?

He felt angry. He needed to get his revenge. So he pulled himself together and started walking back to his base.

“Tubbo, where are you going?”

Tubbo smiled, “I’m going to finish what Tommy started. I’m going to make Dream lose his last life.”

“Tubbo-”

“Sam, he killed my best friend. He manipulated me. I’m tired of playing his games. It’s time I made the rules.”

Sam sighed and before Tubbo could leave, Sam just handed him the compasses. “Keep them safe. After all, Tommy’s compass still works, right?”

Tubbo sighed, “Right.”

-----------------

Quackity was sitting on the signature bench and he had Wilbur’s guitar in hand. He guessed that it was about as a good time as any to sing for the soul they had just lost. The strums of the guitar echoed throughout the entire Dream SMP area and soon, people were gathering around him.

“I heard there was a special place, where men could go and emancipate the brutality and tyranny of their rulers. Well, this place is real you needn’t fret, with Wilbur, Tommy, Tubbo, and Eret. It's a very big and a little bit blown up L’Manberg.”

“My L’manberg. My L'Manberg. My L'Manberg. My L'Manberg.” Tubbo started to sing, sitting down next to Quackity as he started to sing with him.

“For freedom and for liberty, our nation sought to build on these, a victory for all under democracy. Well, the darkness came, and then it went, we built a home and watched it sink, and there from rubble, there emerged L’Manberg.” Quackity sang at the same time that Tubbo had sung the verse of the ad-libbed on the day L’manberg was destroyed.

They both laughed it off as they started to sing again.

“My L’manberg. My L'Manberg. My L'Manberg. My L'Manberg.”

Tubbo had to stop because he had started to cry. “Tommy….”

Quackity just continued. He knew that Tubbo wanted him to continue the symphony. Tommy would’ve liked to hear it.

“With bloodied hands and weakened knees, our people rose like the phoenix, our empty fields and canals ‘round L’Mantree. With sweat and tears we armed our ranks, we laid foundations in our land, and from every lips fro here up to infinity.” Quackity looked at Tubbo to make sure he was okay.

Tubbo just nodded as he continued to wipe away the endless stream of tears.

And as they came to the final verse, everyone around them started to sing with them.

“We sing L’Manberg. We sing L’Manberg. We sing L’Manberg. To our L’Manberg.”

As soon as the song was done, everyone went to hug Tubbo, grief surrounding all of them.

No one thought that Tommy would be gone so soon, especially Tubbo. The one person Tommy cared about more than the discs.

-----------------

“Ranboo….what’s wrong?” Technoblade had asked as soon as he saw Ranboo’s defeated face. “Who hurt you? Was it BBH again? I can-”

“No...nothing like that.” Ranboo shrugged it off, “It’s just….Sam told me that Tommy died today.”

Technoblade snorted, raising an eyebrow, “You know he’s probably joking, right?”

“I don’t think he is.” Ranboo whispered, “Sam told me to give this to you.”

Techno raised an eyebrow before Ranboo dropped something small into Techno’s hand. Something splattered with blood.

“It can’t be.” Techno’s voice was barely a whisper.

No...that was the friendship emerald Phil had given Tommy. Techno had seen Tommy wear it as an earring during his exile time period. Techno knew that Tommy still wore it. There would be no reason for him to lose it, and more importantly, lose it with blood splattered on it.

“I’m sorry, Techno.”

Techno felt a heavy weight on his shoulders. He knew that Tommy wasn’t ready to go just yet. Techno never got to say he was sorry for betraying the boy.

“Why are you sorry?” Techno laughed, “It wasn’t you that killed him, was it?”

“He was like a brother to you, right?”

“Tommy meant nothing to me.” Techno replied coldly as he sighed, “But I’m sorry for your loss, Ranboo. I know that Tommy was your first friend.”

Ranboo just broke down, “I never even got to say goodbye to him. There were so many things I wanted to say to him. Tubbo and I were going to compete with him with our hotel. And-”

Ranboo was caught off guard by a pair of arms wrapping around him. Technoblade was hugging him.

“He meant a lot to me too,” Techno whispered as Ranboo wrapped his arms around Techno as well.

They stood there in silence, just hugging each other for the longest time until finally, Ranboo separated. “Techno...I have something to admit.”

“Your enderwalk state was the one to trap Tommy in the prison? I know.” Techno sighed, “But that’s not you. And you can make it up by coming with me and helping me kill the green Teletubby.”

Ranboo smiled as he took the sword Techno passed him, “Let’s do this.”

-----------------

“Niki, I don’t think I want to do this plan anymore.” Jack sighed as soon as he saw Niki approaching him with plans to try and kill Tommy.

“Why not? Are you really backing out?”

“Niki, look at us. We were blaming a child for something that he’s already trying to fix. You’re blaming him for Wilbur’s death, but you know just as well as me that Wilbur was not in his right mind. He chose to die at the hands of his father.”

“Jack, where is this coming from?” Niki scoffed.

“Dream killed Tommy today. Beaten to death by his abuser in a tight space, according to Sam. It got me thinking.”

“Wait...what? Tommy’s dead.”

“Niki, you never wanted Tommy to be dead, did you? You just needed someone to blame while you were grieving.”

“No, no, no, no, no, he can’t die. We still have plans to make. We were supposed to make his death happy. He was supposed to see Wilbur and face his consequences. What do you mean Dream did it? That could’ve been the worst way for him to die.”

“Niki, we just wanted to feel important to him again. He ignored us, so we forced ourselves into his story. Look back…”

“Wilbur...did choose to die, didn’t he? It wasn’t Tommy’s fault. Oh god…” Niki sobbed, “I tried to kill him. And I couldn’t focus on having fun with him. Now he’s dead.”

Jack nodded, “Me too…”

Niki just went to hug Jack, “How can I ever forgive myself?”

“Time,” Jack whispered, knowing fully well that he needed to forgive himself too.

But for now, they felt ashamed of their actions and thoughts leading up to Tommy’s death.

“At least Dream did it instead of us,” Niki whispered. “That way, we saw clearly before we made the mistake.”

“He was just a kid, Niki.”

“I know...Tommy, we’re sorry.”

-----------------

“Tubbo...did Sam tell you?” Ranboo asked as soon as he entered the Bee N Boo hotel.

Tubbo nodded, holding up the broken compass he was looking at. “Please tell me we’re just in a dream and that Tommy is still in the prison alive, waiting for Sam to let him go.”

“I’m sorry, Tubbo.”

Tubbo slumped down, “I never even got to say goodbye to him. We thought it was over when we put Dream in jail. Sam told me he was still wearing his compass when Sam went into the cell.”

“He was my first friend.” Ranboo whispered, “Of course, we immediately got into a war crime, but he was still nice to me. I’m sorry.”

Tubbo just stood up, “Can we go and get some more blocks to finish the hotel? I don’t want to think about it.”

“Sure...come on.” Ranboo gave a small smile, “We can even go and get some red and white dye to have a memorial for Tommy in the hotel.”

“That sounds nice,” Tubbo mumbled as he allowed Ranboo to pull him towards the flower field.

-----------------

“Hey...what’s up with you two? Why so gloomy today?”

Ranboo looked up at Phil, only holding out something red.

Phil raised an eyebrow as he took it, only to realize it was the bandana he gave Tommy a long time ago.

“You guys are fucking with me, right?”

Techno shook his head as he took out Tommy’s friendship emerald, “Dream killed him in prison.”

Everything came crashing down at that point. “No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, he can’t be dead. Tommy’s the main character. He was supposed to show me the hotel after he got out of prison. I promised myself that I’d be a better father for him and that I would move on from Wilbur’s death. What do you mean that he’s dead?”

“I’m sorry, Phil. I know how much Tommy meant to you.” Techno sighed, putting a hand on Phil’s shoulder. “We’ll leave you alone to think about this.”

“Thank you, Techno.” Phil sighed.

Before Ranboo could leave though, Phil asked, “Did Tommy ever tell you anything about me?”

“He told me once that he missed the dad that was there for him. He said he knew you were getting better and still healing, as was he, but he was tired of you leaning on his misery in order to cope. He just wanted to have a dad again.”

With that, Ranboo left the room, leaving Phil to collapse on the ground, caving in to the voices that were telling him that he was a bad father.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” Phil sobbed, “I failed you, Tommy, and it’s all my fault.”

-----------------

Tommy opened his eyes to see that he was somewhere. And nowhere at the same time. He didn’t know where he was.

“Tommy?”

He heard Wilbur and he turned around to see his brother. “Wilbur, where are we?”

“Oh, Tommy, when I meant see you soon, I didn’t mean this soon.” Wilbur pulled Tommy into a hug, “You’re in the afterlife.”

“That son of a bitch did it, huh?” Schlatt snorted, “I can’t believe he did it.”

“Schlatt-”

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to hurt you.” Schlatt rolled his eyes, “But I can’t believe that Dream killed you. To prove that the book is real.”

“Is it real?” Tommy asked.

“Nah, I’m a drunk alcoholic. How the fuck am I supposed to get a necromancy book? No...I gave him something else.”

“What?”

“A script.”

“A script?”

“Our script. See, Tommy, I was supposed to be the idiot, but I managed to be one step ahead of Pogtopia. Because I knew what was going to happen. So I gave the script to Dream in order for him to win. I knew I would die in the end and that you would get a happy ending. So I needed you to continue losing. So he became self-aware. He kept causing problems and blowing things out of proportion so that there would still be a story. Without one, he wouldn’t exist. He needed you to continue doing stuff. So in the end, he knew it was him or you. And he decided to choose you. To keep the story going for a bit longer.”

“Schlatt, you sick fucker. You never told me that.” Wilbur hissed at Schlatt.

“Well, there was no reason to. We might as well become friends again in the afterlife. There’s nothing to do here. But-”

“Tommy, we’re going to get you back and you’re going to kill that son of a bitch because it isn’t your time to die.”

“How though?”

“By the same way Dream convinced you to let him live. We’re going to guide the people to find a necromancy book and we’re going to bring you back to life.”

“Wilbur, what about you? What if I just like being with my brother again?”

“You have forever to talk to me when you die, but you still have unfinished business with the rest of the Dream SMP.”

Tommy smiled, hugging Wilbur, “Okay...let’s do this then.”

They were going to help the others revive Tommy.

-----------------

Tubbo walked to Tommy’s house. Dozens of flowers laid across the doorway and items of value were on the ground for Tommy. Tubbo was the last person to not put something there.

“Hi Tommy.” Tubbo gave a small smile, “I’m sorry it took me so long to visit your house. Everyone seemed to already give you so many flowers. I don’t know if you’d like more, but I picked them out for you.”

He knelt down at the doorway, placing the flowers.

“I also got you some of the things I’ve kept. Like blue premium bonds, blaze powder flavor therapy, signs from our pranks, swords I grinded for, blocks from my house, and-”

Tubbo couldn’t continue as he held back a sob.

“I miss you so much, Tommy. Why did you have to go?”

He put the items down before walking towards the bench. It felt empty next to him.

Opening his ender chest, he found one of Tommy’s discs in there. He put it into the jukebox next to him as a familiar tune came up.

When Tommy and Tubbo had reunited, Tubbo had shown Tommy his letter he wrote for his best friend he presumed dead.

Tubbo took out the crumpled paper from his pocket.

“I miss you. The memories flashed back tonight. I want to tell you, but I’m sure you’re alright. I can’t move on from the pain and the loss that I gave you. My world is silent right now. I finally live in peace, but it seems like everyone’s been fooling me. I thought that I was fine, but now that you’re gone, I wish I had more time. Don’t you remember you call me your Tubbo? I once assured you, together we’ll grow, but now I’m alone and I don’t know what to do. Everything just leads back to you. I miss you as I sit by the horizon myself. It’s not true, I won’t forget the good times we shared. You told me it was us against the world and I’m sorry I have left you all injured and hurt. My world is silent right now. Don’t you remember I call you my Tommy? I used to tell you that I’ll never leave, but now that I did, and I don’t know what to do. I’m sure everything will lead back to you.” Tubbo read out loud, the tears dropping from his face onto the paper.

And for some reason, he couldn’t stop reading the last sentence. It made sense.

“Everything will lead back to you. Everything will lead back to you.” Tubbo sobbed. Everything he had done was for the good of Tommy or L’manberg. He just wanted to be back with his best friend again.

“Sincerely yours, Your Tubbo.” Tubbo whispered as the song ended and he put everything back into his ender chest.

He felt exhaustion come over him and he laid down on the bench, his tears still flowing down his face. Sleep came over him soon as he cried himself to sleep.

Tommy was gone for real this time and Tubbo couldn’t do anything to reverse it.

#dream smp roleplay #dream smp #spoilers #tommy death #tommyinnit #tubbo #cw swearing #this is my longest fic yet please #tw death #im still crying over tommy's death because i emotionally attached myself to someone who resembles me haha childhood trauma

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thiswasinevitableid · 3 years

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Hi there! If you're feeling it for mermay, I would like to request #9: folklore with OT4? No preference on rating: go with whatever feels best! Thank you so much and I hope you have a nice day!

Here you go! I went SFW on this one.

“You did what??” Dani stares at Barclay, shocked.

“I offered him a job. He needed work while he was here in town for his research, and he seemed nice, and, uh, and-”

“And attractive.” Indrid adds, turning to a new page in his sketchbook.

“Branchin out a little from your usual type, sugar.” Duck kisses his cheek.

“Barclay, he’s a folklorist. A folklorist who specifically studies selkies.”

“Yeah he, uh, he said so. I figured if he’s working for me, or even if he wants me to show him around, I can steer him away from all the selkies.”

“Except for the one showing him around.” Dani gives him a look only an older sister could give.

“It’s not like he’s gonna see me transform.” Barclay mutters.

The meeting ends much as it began; with everyone agreeing that the new guy in town was a potential threat and should be given absolutely no information whatsoever. It’s not that Barclay doesn’t see the man, who introduced himself as Joseph Stern, as someone after Keplers secrets. It’s more that the guy uprooted his entire life to come to an obscure, Alaskan bay in hopes of finding the thing he wants most in the world. Barclay sympathizes.

Kepler is notorious among selkies; a safe haven, a place where there are humans who will protect them, help them, even love them. More than one enterprising selkie, trapped in a loveless marriage or unending servitude, has tricked the human who betrayed them into going north. It’s rare that a human who committed such a breach of trust remains there long; and they always give the pelt back, usually while packing their things in a desperate rush.

It’s a pity, then, that Barclay never got the man who tricked him up here.

He finishes the dinner rush at Amnesty Lodge, located on the edge of the bay and a welcome stop for travelers from land and water alike. As he usually does this time of night, he heads to a dock, far from the lights of town or the ships out at sea, and sits with his feet in the water, solitary and solemn. Tonight, he’s not alone for long.

Silvery hair emerges from the water as Indrid, now sporting a lovely grey tail, swims over to him. They met when Barclay first came here, Indrid more than a little odd but appreciative of Barclays skill in the kitchen and bedroom in ways he’d been without for years. The gift of future vision meant Indrid was nomadic, in that he was determined to use his powers to prevent tragedy whenever he could, and so one day he swam away from Kepler.

Barclay didn’t see him for years. No one did. Until a ranger by the name of Duck Newton was helping tag seals that kept swimming too far up the salmon runs and got the shock of his life when the one he caught turned into a man as he was holding him. Indrid pointed out that his ear was already pierced and if they needed him to hunt somewhere else they could just ask. Duck who, in spite of living in Kepler for years, did not believe in the supernatural until he was holding it, offered the first apology that came to mind, which included inviting Indrid to dinner.

They’ve been dating for two years now.

Indrid rises from the water enough to rest his head in Barclay’s lap, “Come stay with us tonight.”

“I...do you really want me to?”

“If you do not, you spend all night brooding and unable to sleep, thus making for a miserable morning. Too, I am rather fond of your company.” Indrid tilts his chin up with a grin and Barclay leans down to kiss him, “and before you ask, yes, Duck remains fine with this. He says, and I quote ‘Barclay’s my friend and also if you’re hugging him I can escape bed long enough to get ready for work.”

He chuckles, “Okay, I’ll be over soon. I, uh, is there any chance-”

“No” Indrid shakes his head with a sigh, rubs his cheek against Barclays leg, “there are still no futures where we find your coat. Wherever that bastard sent it, he hid it well.”

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Barclay’is in trouble; not only is Joseph a good cook, he’s good company too. He finishes his shifts sweaty and exhausted, same as Barclay, and the selkie wonders what it would be like to see him breathless and red faced in other contexts. He suspects he’s not the only one.

Joseph’s research regularly takes him into the national forest or the adjoining state park on the beach, meaning he’s routinely running into Duck. The ranger initially worried his inability to lie convincingly would be a problem. But after some cursory questions that Indrid saw coming and coached him through technically true responses to, he and Joseph have struck up a passing friendship.

“Joseph is also very interested in his love life” Indrid reveals while swimming circles around Barclay as he stands in the cold water, “not that I blame him. He has excellent taste in men. Present company included.”

“He’s just being nice to me. And I’m practically his boss.”

Indrid pauses his swimming to stare at him, “Dearest, when he’s not working, what does he do?”

“Uh, crosswords? Or he reads, and he likes trying new restaurants and going to movies.”

“And you know all this how?”

“Because he does it near me or asks me to go with him. Oh, uh, huh. Maybe he does have a thing for me.”

Indrid floats into his arms, kisses him, “invite him to dinner. The others at the Lodge are, understandably, still wary of him and don’t want him around. But there’s no harm in him having over for a meal.”

Barclay pulls Indrid closer, tickles his cheek with his beard as he teases, “Seems like I’m not the only one with a crush on him.”

“Not in the slightest.” Indrid grins, “Our lives have not been easy. I don’t know about you, but I intend to embrace affection and love whenever the opportunity presents itself. “

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

There’s no way Joseph is passing up this opportunity.

He’d been refilling his travel mug at the complementary coffee kiosk in the Lodge and asked if anyone happened to know which rivers had the most reported selkie sightings. After each blurting out a different answer, his fellow guests (tenants, really) decided on the Bluff Creek river as the best option.

He wonders if they know just how obvious it is that they’re hiding something.

Joseph is well aware that folklorists are seen as credulous and gullible. He uses that to his advantage. There’s no reason for anyone to know about his seven years in the FBI prior to this. No reason for them to know he knows that Dani will propose to Aubrey soon, that Jake is sneaking out every night, that Barclay is searching for something as intensely as Joseph is.

Most nights, he falls asleep under a burnt orange bedspread dreaming that he’s what the cook is looking for.

Barclays feelings for him are one of the few things at Amnesty he can’t decipher. He offers him a job, takes a personal interest in his welfare, and makes him coffee just how he likes it. Every single morning. But he gets jittery when Joseph asks him about himself, and some days he outright hides from him until they’re in the kitchen.

The dinners with Indrid and Duck aren’t helping his confusion. Barclay practically holds his hand during them, but turns pink whenever Indrid winks at him. And Duck…well, Joseph knows he’s good looking, and he’s never had a hard time hooking up while traveling. The rangers attention just makes him so hot under the collar he wants to strip down at the table. Which is why he can’t decide if Duck agreeing to be his guide on the river is a stroke of luck or a brilliant plan to keep him from noticing things they don’t want him to see.

When Duck meets him at the dock, his casual outdoor clothes unfairly flattering (Indrid likes the uniform better, but Joseph finds it hides too much of Duck’s arms and chest), he decides there’s no point in looking a gift hunk in the mouth.

They paddle upriver, trading bad, pun-based jokes until the wind picks up and drowns their voices out. It’s slow going, and there’s no sign of a selkie, but Duck remains excellent company. They make camp an hour before sunset, in a two man tent that leaves them smushed shoulder to shoulder.

As they’re comparing notes on growing up trans in a small town, Joseph shares the story of the time he nearly broke his tailbone after slipping on a packer he left on the floor. Duck guffaws, shaking the tent as he does, and ends up giggling into Joseph’s shoulder as they both wipe tears from their eyes.

“You have a great laugh, you know that?”

“Sound like a bird of paradise gettin hit by an accordion.” Duck isn’t moving his head.

“That’s a remarkably accurate description, but my point stands.”

He feels Duck turn his head, “Joe? Would, uh, would it be okay if I kissed you? You can say no, swear I won’t abandon you or leave you for the bears so some shit. Just, uh, been thinkin about it all day and figured I’d ask.”

“It won’t upset Indrid?” He slides his hand from his sleeping bag to hold Duck’s own.

“Nah. He and I talked about it. And, uh, his uh, his social circles ain’t super invested in monogamy.”

“Oh. Um” He wants to roll over, wants to pin Duck and kiss him until dawn. But if he does, it might mean he never gets a chance to do the same to a certain someone else, someone who he wishes would just tell him how he felt-

“If it, uh, helps any, happen to know Barclay sees things the same way ‘Drid does.”

“In that case…” he crawls from the sleeping bag, Duck unzipping his own and kicking it open so there’s nothing to stop Joseph’s hands as they stroke and grope their way across his body, “I have a proposal for you.”

Unsurprisingly, they get a late start the next day. As Joseph is paddling, he spots a tail flipping out of the water, far too large to be an otter. Before he can say anything, the roar of the river changes, turning rougher and deeper.

“Fuck, the snowmelt must’ve started earlier than usual, these rapids normally ain’t this big.”

“Should we try to reverse?”

“Maybe we can, nope, fuck, okay we’re goin through whether we like it or not, try’n stay low and hold on.”

Duck’s excellent advice goes out the window at the same instant Joseph goes out of the boat, a swell catching him off guard. He hits a rock at just the wrong angle, pain shooting up his wrist as he releases his paddle. He’s not panicking, but the more he fights to keep his head up, the closer he gets.

Then an arm is around his waist, pulling him to shore. He has just enough time to see his rescuer has a grey tail before they disappear under the water. There’s no sign of the boat or of Duck. A tremendous splash resolves one of those problems.

“Duck!” He hurries to where the ranger coughs water onto the pebbles, “thank the lord.”

“Nah” he coughs again, “thank him.” He gestures weakly to the familiar face and torso now attached to a tail coated in silver-grey fur.

“You’re a selkie.” Joseph scoots across the rocky ground.

“Indeed.” Indrid taps his fingers together, “I, ah, I am sorry my love. I know we agreed he could not know, but when the timelines showed the rapids most of them involved you both going into the river and in, in many of them one or both of you was knocked unconscious on the stones and did not resurface. I could not let that happen to you. Either of you.”

Joseph reaches out reverently with his uninjured hand, and Indrid guides his tail to meet him. It’s exquisite to touch, and as he smooths his fingers along it, Indrid purrs and rolls onto his back.

“Mmmm, already you are proving why it was worth it to save you.” Indrid grins, wiggling closer.

“You, uh, you ain’t angry at us for hidin it from you?” Duck guides Indrid’s head into his lap, petting his hair, looking warily at Joseph.

“Duck, I’ve known you and the rest of the people at the Lodge were hiding things from me, and that given the towns reputation those things were probably related to selkies. It’s not like there aren’t dangers to people learning about selkies and where they live, and I never made it clear whether my research would lead to that. It hurts not to be trusted but, well, I’m used to it.” He looks down at where Indrid is nuzzling Duck’s belly, “I promise, I won’t put you or any of the others in danger.”

“Mmmm” Indrid’s tail relaxes under his hands, “apologies, I am listening, but it took a great deal of energy to reach you in time and pull you from the water. I think I shall nap until our ride comes.”

“Uh, think you’re gonna nap in the car.” Duck tilts his head towards the treeline, where the rumble of an engine rattles up the abandoned logging road. A minute later, a door slams and Barclay appears from the trees.

“Fuck, he wasn’t kidding that you had rough time.” Barclay helps Joseph into the back seat while Indrid, now sporting legs, climbs into the front, “Duck, med kit is behind the drivers seat.”

“Great. Joe, c’mere, I can secure your wrist and get you some painkillers.”

“Right. Thanks.” He turns back to Barclay, eyebrow raised.

“Guess, uh, guess we have a lot to talk about later. I, uh, I should probably just tell you the big thing now. I’m uh, I’m like Indrid.”

Joseph smiles, “I guessed as much the moment Indrid revealed himself.”

“Oh.”

“Is there, um, anything else you want to tell me sooner rather than later?”

Barclay’s honey-rich baritone comes out as shy as a first kiss, “If you said you’d go out with me, it’d make my whole fucking year.”

Joseph murmurs in his ear, “The instant I’m out of the hospital, you’re taking me to dinner.”

------------------------------------------------

There’s a sturdy hammock at the edge of Duck’s yard, overlooking the river. Joseph had no interest in it until he discovered it was the perfect size to have Barclay lay in so he could then lay on his chest. They’re in that configuration when he asks the question he’s been putting off for fear of upsetting his boyfriend.

“How did you end up in Kepler? Were you born here?”

“No.” Barclay’s hands settle on his back, “I grew up off the coast of California. There was a guy, a human, we’d been friends since we were teenagers. As we got older he got, uh, he got it into his head that we could go on the road as like a, uh, a sideshow act. That people would pay big money to see a real selkie. I hated the fucking idea, told him to drop it, and he did, went back to being the considerate, cool guy he’d been when we met. He made a big dinner for my birthday, invited me over and…” his fists tighten in Joseph’s shirt, “and when I was there, he stole my coat.”

“Oh, Barclay” Joseph pets his chest, “I’m so sorry.”

“I agreed to work with him because I didn’t have a choice. I hated every goddamn minute of planning, of knowing he saw me as a fucking meal ticket. One night I snapped, told him to give me back my coat and let me go or I’d make him regret it. He locked me in the fucking basement, and when I got out, he told me he’d shipped my coat far, far away, and if I ever wanted to find it, I’d better stay with him. Asshole didn’t realize getting rid of the coat meant he didn’t have a hold on me anymore. I left, looked for it for years, then basically gave up and moved to Kepler because I knew there were other selkies here. Indrid’s convinced the pelt is here somewhere, keeps saying our finding it is just on the edges of his visions. But I dunno. I think it’s gone for good.”

Fear clings to his heart, “Will you get sick if you never find it? Are, are you sick now, or in pain?”

“No. Selkies don’t die or get sick without their pelts. It’s more like...like a part of you is missing, with this ache where it’s supposed to be. Mine’s been gone so long I barely notice it anymore.”

Joseph sits up, frowning, “You’re lying.”

“...Yeah. Yeah I am. But what else can I do?”

“Let me help. I’m an investigative professional, I have been for years, and I can’t think of a better use for those skills than finding your coat. Than, than making you happy and whole.”

Barclay studies him a moment, then yanks him down into a kiss, whimpering when Joseph nips his lips and licks between them.

“Now, big guy,” he brushes their noses together, “what does it look like?”

“It’s the same color as my hair, with a crescent scar at the base of the tail from where a shark bit me. God, Joseph, I hope you see it some day, if you think Indrid’s tail is beautiful, and it is, mine is fucking gorgeous…”

-----------------------------------------------------

“Joseph! How is my favorite connoisseur of cryptozoology today?”

“ I’m fine, Ned. And since I can see the dollar signs in your eyes from here yes, if you have new merchandise I would like to see it.”

Stationed on the highway at the edge of Kepler, the Cryptonomica is the kind of tourist trap Joseph can’t help but love. Even if the informational plaques contain miles of misinformation, it’s nice to be somewhere that doesn’t scoff at the supernatural or strange.

As Ned rummages in the back, Joseph circles the room to arrive at his favorite display; Bigfoot, complete with a supposed “stuffed bigfoot” whose fur is so many different colors it looks like a patchwork quilt his grandmother kept on the couch. Not for the first time, he amuses himself with the observation that the back portion resembles Barclay’s hair.

“Wait.” He says, loud enough that Ned’s assistant, Kirby, looks up from his desk.

“Something you need, Mr. Stern?”

He kneels down, pulling his penlight from his jacket and peering at the creatures lower back.

“Yes. I need a knife, and I need it now.”

--------------------------------------------------------------------

“Goodness!” Indrid yelps a moment before Joseph bursts through the door.

“Barclay, Barclay look!” The researcher spins in a circle, searching for the cook.

“What is it, is everything okay?” He hurries out of the kitchen, then drops to his knees in shock, “it, it can’t be.”

“It is. Or, um, there’s a very strong chance it is. Look” He holds out the chestnut cloak, “the scar matches.”

“I, I, I-” Barclay grabs the pelt, holding it to his chest, “I must be dreaming.”

“There’s only one way to find out” Indrid grins as he pulls Duck up along with him, then tugs Barclay to his feet, “to the water!”

They’re moving so fast that Barclay only has a moment to swing the coat over his shoulders as he dives into the water, Joseph calling out to be careful.

And then is heart thrums, whole for the first time in decades, as warm fur envelopes him. His second skin sings into his nerves, reunited with it’s home, and he let’s the transformation take it’s full form. When he leaps for joy out of the water, there’s not a human feature to be seen.

Joseph cries out in triumph, Duck whooping out cheers along with him. There’s no sign of Indrid until he returns to the waves, at which point the most stunning silver seal twirls around him. The next time he rises from the water, he reverts to his half-form, savoring the sensation of moving it through the depths as Joseph and Duck wade in to join them.

He pulls Joseph into a kiss, dipping him so his black hair fans out in the water, “You did it, babe.”

“I, I may as well quit all my other jobs, nothing else I accomplish in my life will compare to the look on your face right now.”

“Oh pet” Indrid smiles, “you’ve not seen anything yet. Did I say that right?”

“Close enough, sugar.”

“Come, dearest, I’ve been waiting for years to see if you can out-swim me.”

“You’re fucking on” Barclay kisses Joseph once more for good measure, “be right back.”

As he speeds through the water, Indrid keeping pace with him, he just makes out the conversation behind them.

“You, uh, you know givin a selkie their pelt back is a marriage proposal, right?”

“Yes. But we can talk about that later, all four of us.”

#OT4: Government Men and Their Cryptid Boyfriends #mermay fills #Indrid cold/Barclay #indruck #sternclay #duck newton/agent stern

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the-sympathetic-villain · 3 years

Text

You Belong With Me - Chapter 35

AO3 | First | Previous | Next | Masterpost

Description: Much to his surprise, after being released from prison for a crime he didn’t commit, Logan has been appointed as a the prince’s new advisor.

Word Count: 9201

Chapter Warnings contain major spoilers so they’re at the end of the post, but please scroll down to check them if you need to! <3

---

“What do you mean you lost him?”

“I didn't lose him, princey! He took off!”

“You were supposed to be watching him!”

“I was asleep!” Virgil growled, pacing back and forth in front of the disconsolate prince. “In case you forgotten, I've been with him for two days straight, princey. Do you really think I would have been any use to him if I hadn't slept in that time?”

Roman's expression immediately softened as Virgil snapped at him. “Of course not.”

“Not to mention, I wasted precious time tracking you down coming to find you." Virgil growled, stopping in place. "Time that I could have been looking for him, might I add. So, a little bit of gratitude would go a long way for you right now.”

Guilt fluttered in Roman's chest at the pain in Virgil's voice. “I know, Virge. I'm sorry. I have no doubt you did everything you could to keep him safe.”

“I don't get it, princey." Virgil continued, his voice starting to tremble. “How could he just take off on me like that?”

"I think I may know why." Roman whispered quietly, glancing up at Virgil with a pointed look in his eyes. "It would seem that our guest in the dungeons also took his leave this morning."

“Roman, you can't seriously think that Logan would—” Virgil growled before Roman cut him off.

“There is plenty of reasons for Logan to seek out more answers, Virgil," Roman muttered, running his hand through his hair. "You and I bother know that both of them going missing in one night is not a coincidence."

“You’re saying he betrayed us.” Virgil crossed his arms, glaring at Roman with an accusing look in his eyes.

“He left his chambers willingly, Virge. The guards told you as much,” Roman sighed as Virgil’s expression soured. “but that being said, I'm not making any accusations, Virgil. Regardless of Logan’s feelings towards me, I don't believe he would go behind your back.”

“Well, clearly you're wrong, because he seems to have done just that.” Virgil spat, shoving his fists in his cloak. “Shit, what was he thinking, princey? He's gonna get hurt.”

“He wants answers." Roman stated quietly, staring at the ground. “The answers he didn’t get from me.”

“Fine, I get why he want to talk to him again, but why go alone?” Virgil hissed, his voice becoming frantic as he paced the room. "It doesn't make sense. He could have said something. I would have taken him."

“You would have taken him go to see this other fae in the middle of night?” Roman raised an eyebrow at him skeptically.

“If the alternative was him going alone, then yes, I would have." Virgil muttered angrily.

“Virgil. I know this is hard, but none of this is your fault. It's mine and I'm going to get this sorted out.” Roman dropped his gaze to the ground before stepping toward the door. “I should put out an alert immediately. If he's still close, we might catch him.”

“Wait, Roman.” Virgil held up his hand to block Roman’s way. “Isn’t your family still facing backlash over the alert that was called out on you? Should you really do that?”

“Logan’s safety is more important than anything those bastards have to say in court.” Roman muttered, trying to dodge around Virgil. “I can lose everything for all I care, but I can’t let him get hurt."

Virgil caught Roman's shoulder, forcing him back. “You said it yourself, he’s the one that snuck out, princey. What if he's not looking to be found?”

A lump caught in Roman’s throat and he pause he shook his head. “It doesn’t matter what he thinks. We have to find him.”

Virgil stopped abruptly, hearing something off in his tone. He turned to Roman, trying to catch his eye as his gaze dropped away to avoid Roman. “Wait—why? What do you know?”

“I made another mistake, Virgil.” Roman’s voice trembled as he looked up and Virgil could see his eyes glisten as he struggled to contain his emotions.

Virgil stepped forward, hesitantly reaching a comforting hand to Roman’s shoulder. “Shit, princey. What'd you do?”

“I didn’t tell him everything. I wanted to, but I couldn't. I just—” Roman glanced at Virgil’s hand on his shoulder guiltily, feeling unworthy of the simple comfort. “Virge, if that fae told him what I didn’t, it may have shattered any trust Logan had left in me.”

Virgil’s grip tightened on Roman’s shoulder as he stared at his friend. “What didn’t you tell him, princey?”

“The fae that died in our charge—the one we enslaved for our own ends—she was his ancestor.” Roman sighed. “His mother, if I'm not mistaken.”

“Roman,—Why? Why wouldn't you tell him that?” Virgil muttered in disbelief, staring at him horrified. He took a breath as he realized that Roman couldn't even bring himself to meet his gaze. “Come on, princey. Talk to me. I've never known you to lie, so why start now?”

“It was too much, Virge I couldn't do that to him.” Roman whispered quietly, keeping his eye trained shamefully on the ground. “He'd just learned of the destruction of an entire generation of the Fair Folk.” Roman paused taking a breath. “He was broken. How could I turn around and tell him his only family was dead and—and that it all happened because of him.”

“It may be hard, but he has a right to know, Roman.” Virgil crossed his arm, staring sternly at Roman as he moved to lean on the wall next to him. "You have to know that."

“I do, Virgil. I never intended to keep this from him forever.” Roman pleaded quietly as he looked up at Virgil’s unchanging expression. “You have to believe me. I only wanted to give him a moment to process one world-shattering realization before I threw another at him."

Virgil was quiet for a spell as he anxiously tapping his fingers on his arm. After a long moment, he turned to face the window, lost in thought and Roman's mind began to race.

Roman swallowed painfully as his friend avoided his gaze. “You do believe me. Right, Virge?”

“What?” Virgil turned up to him in a daze, taken aback by the question as he glancing over his shoulder.

“I wouldn’t hurt him on purpose. I wouldn't—” Roman's voice trembled and he suddenly looked faint. “—I swear I didn't know he'd go off on his own, Virgil. I thought I'd have more time—that I'd have another chance to talk to him—”

“Princey!” Virgil lunged forward, placing a hand on Roman’s chest to stop him from collapsing. Roman hung limply in his arms as Virgil attempted to steady them both.

“I'm sorry, Virgil. I’m so sorry.” Roman muttered, barely coherent. "I did this to him. This is all my fault. He's going to get hurt—"

“Roman, stop. Just stop.” Virgil stared down at the crumbling prince in his arms, suddenly glad they were in Roman's private room as the prince melted into him, mumbling incoherent apologies. “Gods, what are you even apologizing for?"

"I've always been so careful not to hurt anyone. I never asked for this power—” Roman whispered breathlessly. “I never—I just—”

"Shit.Take a breath, princey.” Virgil’s arms curled around the prince as he lowered them both to the ground, allowing Roman to curl into his chest. “You’re having a panic attack. Breathe with me."

“I don't deserve that.” Roman choked on his own words as he buried his head into Virgil’s chest.

“You don't deserve what?” Virgil whispered quietly. His heart ached with empathy for his friend as he clung tightly to Roman’s shoulders. “To breathe?”

Roman’s silence hung heavy in the air between them and Virgil felt like he could hear his heart crackling as he realized how far his friend had fallen.

“Oh, Ro. How badly did I fail you to make you think one mistake would undo the years of friendship we've built together?” Virgil calmly ran his fingers through Roman’s hair.

“It's note a mistake. Undeniably, I hurt him. I shouldn't be forgiven for my carelessness.”

“You’re right, princey. It wasn't even mistake.” Virgil cut him off quickly. “You made the choice to protect Logan and it went sour. You did the best you could and that's any of us can ask of you."

“I hurt him, Virgil." Roman whispered quietly. The melancholy in his voice broke Virgil’s heart, but he could feel Roman's breathing start to steady. “Every time I open my mouth, I hurt him again. I can't stand the way that feels. If he d—” Roman swallowed painfully as he started to push away. “—Whatever it doesn't even matter. My problems can wait. We need to find him now.”

“Roman, stop. Let me focus on you for one second.” Virgil pleaded, tightening his grip on the prince’s shoulders. Roman paused, still restless but clearly reluctant to leave the comfort of Virgil’s arms. “Princey, I trust you more than I trust myself. You could damn well tell me the sky was purple right now and I would roll with whatever you told me. There's not a shadow of doubt in my mind that you would never lead me astray, so trust me. Come hell or high water, I'm with you until my last breath, Roman.”

Virgil smiled as Roman let out a sharp breath and his muscles seemed to relax slightly. He gently rubbed Roman’s shoulder, hoping to ground him.

“Seriously, I know I need to say this shit more often, but I worship you, princey.” Virgil smiled earnestly as Roman paused in confusion. “You're my hero, and if I manage to become half as kind and generous as you in my life, I’ll consider it well lived.”

“What?” Roman sat up slowly and looked up at Virgil with confusion in his eyes.

“Gods, I really messed up. How do you not know this, princey?” A timid smile twitched on Virgil’s lips as he ran his hand through his hair nervously. "I know I've never really admitted it, but I know I would have ended up dead if that guard had been smart enough to take me straight to prison instead of to you.”

“That was nothing." Roman waved him off, guiltily trying to pull himself away from the comfort he didn't deserve.

“What are you talking about?” Virgil’s eyes widened as he pulled Roman back, latching onto him tightly. “It was everything! You changed my life forever.”

Roman bit his lip, looking almost guilty as Virgil praised him. “It was simply the right thing to do. Nothing more”

“The right thing to do would have to let me go, princey. You could have just sent a stupid kid home with a slap on the wrist. You didn't have to do what you did.” Virgil muttered, stupefied at Roman’s denial of praise for the gifts he'd given him. He pulled the prince closer, his voice full of affection as he whispered soft reassurances to the prince. “Seriously, what teenager looks at another kid and just takes responsibility for them without a second though?”

“I did what needed to be done.” Roman whispered, his voice trembling. “You deserved a home and I don't need credit for giving you a chance at a decent life.”

“Do you know how many full-grown adults looked at me and didn’t come to the same conclusion?” Virgil whispered, running a hand through his hair. He smiled as Roman relaxed slightly, rocking him softly as he continued to whisper to the prince. "Much like all the adults who looked the other way when they found out what was happening to Patton.”

“Virgil—" Roman tensed as another wave of guilt rushed over him.

“You can't deny there were adults in his life who knew about his father abusing him for years.” Virgil cut him off. “Every one of them turned a blind eye, but not you. You knew him for less than an hour before you risked everything for that poor kid. Your title, your career, your family. You could have lost everything. Roman, shit. it takes an extremely kind soul to be willing to make that sacrifice.”

Roman was quiet as Virgil continued, seemingly unable to process what Virgil was saying.

“Hell, Roman. Your own brother attempted to murder you and the first thing you did was make sure the guy he framed was set free. You gave him a job and a life he could only have dreamed of. You saved him.” Virgil sighed, leaning back against the wall as he rested his elbows on his knees. “Come on, princey. When the world was ready to give up on us, you stepped up and gave us back the life that had been ripped from us. Do you really think we'd turn on you for a simple mistake?”

Roman sighed. His shoulders slumped as he leaned back into the wall. “It's not just a simple mistake, Virgil. My failure to act affected countless people. Lives and families that were torn apart because of my ignorance.”

Virgil grunted his disbelief. “Well then, would you put that blame on me?”

“What?” Roman blinked in confusion before tipping his head up to face Virgil.

“I have fae contacts—” Virgil paused as his eyes flashed with guilt. “—friends in the underground of the city. They're forced to live in the underground because they’re visibly fae. That wasn't fair for them, but I didn't think twice about the fact. I just accepted it, because that's the way it's always beem. So, I ask you again. Would you put that blame on me?”

“That's not your fault.” Roman stared at him with concern in his eyes. “You couldn’t change anything for them.”

“Bullshit. I work for you, princey. If I'd brought this up, you would have at least heard me out and I would have risked nothing to do so. It never even crossed my mind to advocate for my friend, princey. That's wrong. I know it is, but I'm only now realizing it.” Virgil turned to him, tugging on the ends of his hair restlessly. “I mean, even Patton has known about the fae for years, so let’s be honest with ourselves. We're all a little guilty of not doing more.”

“Perhaps.” Roman whispered breathlessly, biting his lip.

“You don't have to bear this burden alone, Roman. We all played a part in how the fae have been treated, so it's only right that we fix it together.” Virgil put a hand on his shoulder, looking at him earnestly. “Whatever it takes, we're in it together.”

“Thank you, Virgil.”

Roman's gentle whisper brought a smile to Virgil's face and he gently squeezed the prince's shoulder. "Anytime, princey."

“You know I'd fall apart without you, don't you?” Roman whispered with a quiet chuckle.

“Come on, princey.” Virgil smirked, casually tipping his head away to hide the slight redness in his cheeks. “You had a panic attack. Don’t be so dramatic.”

“That's like telling me not to breathe. It's all I know.” Roman leaned upright, quickly wrapping an arm around Virgil and mussing his hair down into his eyes. He chuckled as Virgil playfully shoved him away. “But seriously, I can't overstate how much you do for me, Virgil. I'd be completely lost without you. ”

“Clearly, if you’re falling apart after only three days.” Virgil straightened his hair, expression softening as Roman’s face fell slightly . Virgil paused, sensing Roman's discomfort, so he leaned closer as his friend’s gaze dipped to the ground. “You are good now though, right?”

“I’m fine. I just—" Roman sighed, not looking up. "Logan had to learn of his mother’s death through that snake, Virgil. I could have spared him that, so why didn’t I just tell him?”

“You were trying to be kind, Roman.” Virgil whispered sadly. “No one can fault you for your intentions.”

“My intentions are irrelevant.” Roman stated dryly, starting to stand up. “What I did ended up as far from kind as I could possibly imagine, but it doesn’t matter, we need to go—"

“Logan adores you, Roman." Virgil put a hand on his shoulder, stopping him in place. “I know that hasn’t changed. He'll come around in the end, princey.”

Roman paused for a moment, staring forward absently. “I appreciate the thought, but what Logan thinks of me is the little consequence if we don't find him fast.”

“What?”

“Listen, I appreciate your reassurances, but we need to leave my problems for another time. Whether or not Logan is a willing participant or not in that snake's game, we need to find them now.” Roman muttered under his breath as he cast a look back at Virgil. “If I'm not mistaken, they’re going to try to break the curse, Virgil, and we have to stop them.”

Virgil blinked at Roman in confusion as his movements became frantic. He tried to put a hand on Roman’s shoulder. His fingertips narrowly grazed the prince’s back as he shot to his feet. “Wait—but isn’t that a good thing, princey?”

"No," Roman shook his head as he turned to offer Virgil a hand up. “There’s a reason this hasn't been done and it's not just that Logan is an integral part of the ritual.”

“What?” Virgil muttered, confused as Roman pulled him to his feet. He tried to take a step back, startling slightly as Roman didn’t let go of his hand.

“The ritual will kill him, Virgil—”

“What?” Virgil bristled, immediately tensing at Roman’s words.

“—and I guarantee that snake hasn't told him that part. So, whether or not Logan is with him by choice—”

“We need to find him.”

“Immediately.” Roman stared into space, suddenly focused as he tried to formulate a plan. “I should send out an alert—”

“Wait, princey. Won't that drive them further underground?” Virgil pressed. “That fae's a shape-shifter. If we spook him, any trail they’re leaving now could vanish without a trace.”

“I don’t think we have a choice.” Roman sighed, running his fingers through his hair. “As of now, I couldn’t begin to guess where they’re going. I think our only shot would be to cast a wide net and hope they get swept up in our initial search.”

"No way. This is Logan, princey. We have to do better than a shot in the dark.” Virgil stepped forward, leaning closer to the prince. “Narrow it down. Tell me what you know about this ritual.”

"See, what I know of the spell is exactly the problem." Roman tipped his eyes up to Virgil as he continued. “The spell is of Unseelie creation so its power waxes and wanes with the moon, and unfortunately for us, that means the spell will be most easily broken on the night of the Dark Moon.”

Virgil paused, staring at him helplessly. “That’s only a few days away, princey.”

“And the journey itself is nearly two days, Virge.” Roman muttered, swallowing down the lump in his throat as he considered their chances. “The Elder Fae—Logan's mother—never revealed where she cast the spell. Despite our hold on Logan, the place is sacred to the fae and she refused to compromise its location even on a threat to Logan's life. All we knew was the time between when she left and when the spell’s effects were felt was roughly two days.”

“That's not a lot of room for error.” Virgil dropped his gaze, lost in thought.

“That's our dilemma, Virgil.” Roman hesitated as a touch of guilt entered his voice. “Time is of the essence. We need to make a choice quickly, because every minute we waste edges us that much closer to losing him.”

“Don't you do that to yourself, Roman. Your time spent coming down from a panic attack wasn’t wasted. I'll fight you on that every—” Virgil’s voice trailed off suddenly as he stared into open space, entranced by his own thought. “Wait—Would another fae know where this place is?”

Roman blinked, raising an eyebrow. “Only a high-ranking fae, but even if we located one, the Elder Fae herself wasn’t willing to divulge that information and we threatened her with her child's life. I highly doubt any of the others will simply bend to our demands because we asked nicely. There would be a serious price to pay.”

“Well, we’re about to find out that price.”

“What?”

“Nothing, I need you to get weapons and meet me at the castle entrance in ten minutes. I'm going to grab Patton—”

Roman stared at him incredulously. “Wait—why?”

“No questions.” Virgil muttered, slipping around him as he darted to the door, calling over his shoulder. “Just do what I ask, princey.”

“But where are we going?” Roman called after him.

“Into the city.” Virgil called as he disappeared through the doorway, leaving Roman standing in shock as the door closed behind him.

---

“Keep your head down, princey.”

Virgil's hiss filled Roman's ears as his head was shoved down to face the ground. Roman nodded, reluctantly dipping his head as he followed the sight of Virgil’s ankles through the crowd of people. Any other day, Roman might have protested the rough treatment but he could feel the anxiety radiating off of his friend as he led them through the busy city streets. He couldn't exactly blame Virgil. Roman was at least as on edge as his shadowy friend as the crowd shifted around him.

He let out a soft breath as the gentle touch of a hand on his back pulled him from his spiraling thoughts. Patton pressed against his side and Roman sucked in an appreciative breath, grateful for his friend’s grounding presence as his shoulder collided with yet another person making their way down the crowded street.

“I'm sorry.” Virgil’s hand reached out behind him in a comforting gesture as he ducked around yet another corner. “We just—We can’t afford any delays right now. Alright?"

“Don't worry about me, Virgil. I can handle it.” Roman whispered back, biting his lip as Virgil faced forward once more. He knew all too well that he and his friends couldn't afford for him to be recognized on the streets. The attention he would draw would make it nearly impossible to get wherever Virgil was taking them. Virgil was right. He needed to keep his head down and his mouth shut. It was as simple as that, and yet, despite his agreeableness, he was acutely aware of the hypocrisy of his own statements. His skin tingled, threatening him with over-stimulation as the loud sounds and unfamiliar smells of the city streets.

“We're almost there. I promise.”

A small smile twitched at the corner of his lips at his friends’ intuitive sense of his discomfort. At the very least, he knew he has their support as they turned street after street through the city. So, he took a breath leaned into Patton, allowing him to guide him through the crowd. As much as he hated to admit it, his previous trips to the city had been accompanied by a large company of guards and the citizens had kept a distance from his person. The space had given him room to breath, but now, people nearly walked through him, carelessly knocking him aside as they navigated the unruly crowd. The experience was overwhelming to say the least, especially considering he was still feeling raw from his earlier panic attack.

Roman cringed, trying to steel his nerves as yet another person struck his shoulder. People’s loud voices blasted directly his ears as the residents strained to communicate with their own traveling companions and despite his best efforts, Roman felt his body rebelling against being here. Guilt fluttered in Roman’s chest as Patton’s arm tightened around him, clearly sensing his unwarranted tension. He knew he needed to do better.

For Logan.

His shame at his own weakness suddenly amplified at the memory of why they were here in the first place. This was his mistake to fix. Regardless of his friend’s willingness to help, it was his actions that had brought them here in the first place. He sucked in a breath. He knew this was his responsibility. He would fix it, and yet he found himself leaning deeper into Patton’s grip, his senses still raw and strained from his earlier panic attack.

“You’re doing so good, Ro.”

Patton’s gentle whisper enveloped him, gently grounding him as they turned a corner into a dark alleyway and the noise stopped. The statement might have felt disingenuous if he'd had time to process it, but his attention was quickly drawn to Virgil as he stopped abruptly in front of them. He blinked, lifting his head slightly as Virgil turned to face them.

“Are you doing okay, princey?” Virgil tipped his head down to catch his eye under the good.

“I'll survive.” Roman muttered weakly.

“Listen," Virgil stepped forward, whispering in his ear. "I need to know you’re okay before we go in here.”

“I'm fine.”

“You just had a panic attack.”

“My nerves are shot, but my brain's not, Virge.” Roman growled irritably. “I can deal—”

“I don't have time to edge around your pride.” Virgil cut him off stiffly, softening as Roman flinched at his sharp tone. Gently, he grabbed Roman’s collar as he eyed the prince under his hood. “Nobody’s judging you for what you’re feeling, Roman, least of all me. I know you’re not any weaker for the intensity of your emotions, but I need to know where you stand. Be honest with me, can you handle this?”

Roman’s gaze dropped briefly to the ground as he took a breath. “Just tell me what I need to do, Virgil.”

“Princey, if you’re not up to this, I need to know.” Virgil chided softly, continuing to press him as his grip tightened on his collar.

“Virge—" Patton protested weakly.

“It's okay, Pat. Virgil’s right to question my current state,” Roman muttered, waving him off as he looked up at Virgil earnestly. “but of it helps find Logan, I’ll find way to settle my nerves. I can handle it."

“Good enough,” Virgil’s grip slackened as he stared sympathetically at Roman. “because if I'm going to need you to keep this guy's interest long enough for me to convince him to hear us out.”

Roman’s eyes narrowed on him seriously, glancing down the alleyway behind his friend. “Where are we, Virgil?"

“I don’t have time to explain everything.” Virgil held up a finger as Roman looked to protest, glancing over to Patton's confused expression as they both stared at him. “Down the alleyway is the lair of one of the most powerful fae in the country.”

Roman blinked at him, glancing warily over his shoulder. “And you think this villain will be willing to disclose the location to which Logan is traveling?”

“He's not a villain.” Virgil protested stubbornly, pacing the space in front of them.

“Forgive me or being skeptical. You literally used the word ‘lair’, Virgil." Roman whispered snarkily, casting a glance nervously over his shoulder. “So, if he's not a villain, then who is this guy?”

“He runs the city’s underground, princey.” Virgil finally paused, turning to Roman’s shocked expression with a sigh. “Every shadow in this city answers to him, and he's high-ranking among the fae too. If anyone has the answers we're looking for, it's him.”

Roman was silent, staring blankly at him.

“I know it's not ideal, but—”

“Do you trust him, Virgil?”

Virgil looked up at him suddenly, catching the seriousness of the prince's gaze. “With my life.”

“That's good enough for me.” Roman whispered, gesturing down the alleyway. “Take the lead.”

Virgil nodded, turning to Patton. “You still coming in, Pat?”

“Logan’s family.” Patton mumbled, glancing nervously down the narrow alleyway. “I'm not going anywhere, kiddo.”

“Okay, then.” Virgil turned back to Roman. “Roman, I'm going to need you to trust me enough to let me handle this.”

Roman looked up at him confused. “Of course.”

“No, this is different than anything I’ve asked of you before.” Virgil stated firmly,, pointing to the sword sheathed at Roman's waist. “No matter what you see or what he does, you leave your sword in its sheath. If he gets angry, you just let me handle it. Don't intervene. Promise?”

“I promise.” Roman nodded without a moment’s hesitation.

“Good.” Virgil smiled nervously, appreciative that the prince didn't fight his command. He turned his head up, wrapping a hand around Patton. "Then, let's go."

---

Roman couldn’t help but tip his head as they entered the seedy underground bar, feeling the air shift as they crossed threshold to the magical establishment. Immediately, he felt different. His heart slowed as he stared out across the room and his vision seemed to blur as bright colors flooded his sight, changing rapidly as they moved around him. Squinting through the bright lights in the darkness, he could just make out the massive, metal mirrors hanging from the walls around them, further causing his head to spin with the movement. He turned his head, watching as the reflections of the glowing blue and green bottles hanging on the wall danced along the dark bar's reflective surface. The graceful movement was almost hypnotizing and Roman swayed. He struck something warm with his shoulder and suddenly bodies of unfamiliar creatures swarmed around him as his vision darkened.

“Get lost!”

Virgil’s voice echoed in his ears as an arm wrapped around his shoulder. Roman felt himself be guided forward. His head started to swim as he leaned into Virgil.

“Relax, princey. I've got you.”

He felt himself being dragged to the side, nearly retching as he was dropped into chair, his friends’ voices echoing distantly around him.

“Stay with him, Pat. I’ll be back in a moment.”

“Sure thing, kiddo.”

“Don't eat or drink anything.”

“I know. I won't.”

“And keep a close eye on him, Pat. I don't like how pale he's looking.”

“I've got him, kiddo. Go do what you have to. We'll be okay.”

Roman’s vision blurred and his stomach twisted as he stared into the ground. He leaned his shoulder into the chair behind him, nearly tipping his hood off the back of his head.

“Ro, keep your hood up. You—”

---

Roman jumped as a loud crack filled his ears, jolting him upright as he glanced around him frantically to find the source of the noise. His manic movements stopped as he looked up to see Virgil closing the door in front of him. He was able to calm himself slightly a the sight of his friend, but he remained alert noting for the first time that his surroundings had changed. The strange, dizzying bar had vanished and he clumsily glanced around to find himself alone in an empty room with his friends. He opened his mouth to speak, but the words would not come as he stared, trying desperately to reconcile the sudden transition. He looked up, vision swimming as Virgil suddenly turned around, rushing forward as he seemed to notice Roman's awareness had returned.

"Hey." Virgil's hands cupped his face, steadying him as he stayed. "You back with us?"

“Where am I, Virgil?” Roman muttered wearily, his head spinning from the abrupt transition.

“We haven't gone far. This is a back room in the same joint." Virgil leaned close to his face, examining his eyes with concern. “Turns out the bar was a little bit much for you to handle.”

Roman quickly turned his head away, changing the subject as his stomach twisted with guilt at the apprehension in Virgil's eyes. “Where's Patton?”

“I'm right here, kiddo.” Patton's voice came from behind him and he felt his chest warm as Patton appeared at his side, wrapping his arm around his waist as he cuddles into his shoulder. “Don't worry. I’m used to handling the ebb and flow with my own, so the magic didn't quite affect me the same as you."

"And I'm more than used to it at this point." Virgil took a step back, still looking at him with a worried expression. "I'm sorry, princey. I should have known that was going to happen."

"I'm fine, Virge. No need to worry." Roman smiled tiredly as he leaned into Patton's hug, taking in the room as Patton continued to squeeze him. The room itself was unimpressive. It appeared to be a small study, though worn from disuse. Roman would have guessed it'd been decades since is served its original purpose. Still, eerily many of the faded artifacts remained from that distant time, a soft memory of normalcy in the now liminal space. Magic seemed to emanate from walls themselves, almost dulling his senses as its calming influence seeped into his body. He glanced up to the boarded up windows and letting his gaze drift to where soft, luminous blue light cascaded down the bookshelves from small jars, drifting through the room like mist in the air. He continued to scan the room until a movement in his periphery caught his eye. He stopped abruptly, spinning his head as a shadow began to manifest behind Virgil.

“Virg—” Roman shot to his feet, nearly lunging at his friend as a hand manifested around his throat. A soft gasp passed Virgil's lips and Roman watched helplessly as a tall, dark-haired man stepped out of the shadows, looming over Virgil’s shoulder with a crooked smile.

“You’ve got my attention, babes.” The man whispered threateningly in Virgil’s ear. “You better hope you can keep it. I was having a good time when you interrupted me.”

Patton spun his head up with a squeak as he squeezed Roman tighter. Roman barely glanced down, hardly even daring to blink as he tried to keep his disjointed attention focused on the man threatening his friend.

“Re—” Virgil’s face scrunched as the hand tightened around his throat.

“Ah, ah.” The man chimed cheerily in Virgil’s ear, flashing a devilish glance at Roman as he leaned into Virgil's ear. “I ain’t interested in the current company having even a small part of my true name. Try again.”

“Sleep,” Virgil whispered hoarsely, his eyes twisting to catch a glimpse of the man hovering over his shoulder. "I need your help."

“You always do, kid.” Roman watched uncomfortably as the man's fingernails dug into his friends’ shoulder, causing Virgil to flinch. “Don't you think I do enough for you?”

“Of course you do.” Virgil pleaded quietly as the man slipped behind him,

“And yet—”

Roman flinched, jumping to his feet as metal glinted in the stranger's hand. Dazed, he stumbled, pushing Patton behind him as the stranger pointed a dagger in their direction. He reached behind him, feeling Patton's shaking as he pressed into Roman's back.

“—you bring my ultimate enemy into my home.” The man's threatening hiss grew deeper as he turned the dagger back to Virgil’s throat, his crooked smile widening as Roman's mouth dropped open helplessly. He turned his gaze down, grabbing a handful of Virgil's hair as he pressed the blade against his throat. “Ain’t got much to show for your loyalty. Do you now?”

“I needed your attention, Sleep.” Virgil whispered, making only the barest movements as the blade pressed to his throat.

“I really don't take kindly to being manipulated, kid.” Sleep growled in his throat, curling his head threateningly over Virgil's shoulder.

Roman instinctively raised a hand to the sheath on his waist, staring intently at the blade on Virgil’s throat. Remembering his promise a moment too late, he tensed as the stranger's gaze locked on his hand as it grazed the metal of the handle of his own blade. He pulled his gaze from the stranger as he looked to Virgil. A small shake of Virgil's head was all the indication he needed to slowly pull his hand away from the weapon at his hip, making a display of the motion as the man continued to stare at him. Realization spread across the man's face as his leer bounced between Roman and Virgil and a grin spread wide across his face, sending a shiver down Roman's spine.

“You've got him well-trained, Virgil,” The stranger scoffed, leaning closer to Virgil's ear with a satisfied smirk. “but I wonder what he'll think when I press a little further. Don't you?”

Virgil closed his eyes as the blade moved up his throat. Roman watched tensely, barely blinking as he pushed Patton behind him.

“Well, kid. Start spilling your guts so I can decide if your even worth my time,” Sleep hissed, snarling in Virgil's ear. “Trust me, I haven’t had nearly enough of my good brew to be nearly as patient as you need me to be.”

“He's doing it for me.”

“Princey, don't.” Virgil whispered, opening his eyes with a pleading in his eye. “Just leave it—”

Roman blinked for a moment, staring deep into Virgil’s dark brown eyes as he cast wary glances at the stranger. "Please, I'm the one who needs something. If you're going to hurt anyone—"

“Wrong answer.” The man's gaze grew distant as he twisted his wrist, dragging his dagger across Virgil's throat

Time seemed to slow as he locked onto Virgil’s gaze, praying to whatever god may be listening that this was the right choice. Patton screeched in his ear, but Roman reached an arm around him, holding him back even as every inch of his body screamed at him to lunge forward to save his friend. He forced his muscles to remain stiffly in place as he kept his gaze trained on Virgil. Dread dropped in his stomach as the dagger passed decisively over Virgil's throat and he clenched his eyes shut, unable to face his choice.

“You’re a miserable bastard."

“Can't blame a bitch for playing it safe, babes.”

"Bullshit. You didn't need to push it that far."

Roman nearly collapsed with relief as Virgil's voice sounded in front of him and his gaze shot up. He stared in shock as Virgil angrily pushed the stranger away from him, apparently uninjured.

“You’re okay.” Roman breathed, feeling his knees go weak underneath him as Virgil turned toward them.

“Damn, Roman. Of course, I'm fine.” Virgil looked up, rushing toward him and Patton. “I'm sorry.”

“What was that?” Roman rasped as Virgil struck his chest and his arms curled around him and Patton apologetically.

“Don't blame Virgil for the theatrics. He played along for my benefit.” The strange fae took a step back submissively, smiling as Roman’s arm curled around Virgil protectively. “I can't be too careful in my position. Gotta make sure I know whose are a little too eager to pull the trigger on me.”

"So, if I had—”

"If you'd even lunged at me, I would have been in the next city before you even blink." Sleep stated dryly, flashing a glance at Virgil. "I had to know you wouldn't go rogue on Virgil, if you thought he was in danger, but kid's got some heavy influence on you if you sat through that without making a move."

"I'm sorry, Roman. I—”

“But the dagger—” Roman's voice trembling softly as Virgil whispered apologetically into his ear, clinging him as if his life depended on it."

“Not even real, babes.” The man cooed as he tipped his hand, allowing the dagger to drop from his hand. Roman stared in shock as the blade disappeared into a dark mist as it hit the ground. “Virgil was never in any danger. I'm too fond of him to just dump him like that.”

“Virgil—” Patton’s soft tremble drew all of their attention as he nearly dropped to his knees in shock of what he’d just witnessed.

Virgil cast an apologetic glance at Roman as he shifted his focus to Patton. He wrapped his arms tightly around Patton as he started to shake. “Pat, I'm so sorry. None of it was real.”

Tears flowed down Patton's face as he clung to Virgil. “I thought you were—”

“I'm not, Pat.” Virgil whispered reassuringly, hands wrapped around Patton's neck as he dropped to the ground with him. “I'm right here.”

“Perhaps,” The strange fae's voice pulled Roman’s attention from where he was staring vacantly at his friends. Roman tensed as the man moved silently across the room, stopping in front of a dark, worn sofa sitting in the corner. “I can ease your friend’s mind a bit.”

Roman tensed as the man extended a hand out to Patton, growling defensively. "He doesn't need you to dull his senses."

"Who said anything about bringing anything down?" Remy smirked at him. "I only do uppers, babe. I'm much more into the stimulation side of things."

Roman sneered at the stranger's smile in distrust.

The man seemed to ease. His teasing smile disappeared and he looked at Roman with what seemed to be genuine concern. "Kid's well off to know someone's out there looking out for him the way you are, but all I'm offering is a bit of understanding. No more tricks or games on my words as one of the Fair Folk."

Patton lifted his head, still clinging to Virgil like he might disappear at any moment. He whimpered as Virgil pulled away, looking over his shoulder at the man.

“It’s okay, Pat.” Virgil whispered, peeling away from Patton iron-tight grip. “I'm not going anywhere. Just go see him. Okay?”

Roman’s eyes danced suspiciously over the stranger’s calming smile as he patiently waited for Virgil to convince Patton to let him go. He watched in shock as Virgil gently guided Patton out of his arms towards the stranger. Patton glanced back at his friends, still shaking timidly as he crossed the room. Roman tensed as he reluctantly neared the man, slowing his pace as he reluctantly looked at the stranger’s hand.

“It's okay, babes. I won't bite.” Roman winced as the man smirked, not breaking eye contact with Patton. “Not unless you ask, babes.”

Roman watched cautiously as Patton reached his hand out, jolting in shock as the stranger’s eyes glowed a bright pink as their hands connected. He nearly lunged forward as Patton squeaked loudly, but Virgil’s arm shot out in front of him, barring him from rushing to his friend. Roman glanced down furiously at Virgil, ready to protest as Patton's cheerful yell pulled him out of his thoughts.

“Remy!”

Roman's head shot up and he frantically watched his friend shoot forward. He stared entranced as Patton threw his arms around the man, glancing over at Virgil desperately, but Virgil didn't even seem concerned. In fact, a gentle smile stretched across Virgil’s face, giving Roman pause as he looked back at Patton.

“So much for the secret identity, I guess.” Remy chuckled quietly as he wrapped his arms around Patton, but he didn't miss the way his eyes darted up to Roman suspiciously.

“Sorry. I got excited.” Patton mumbled, embarrassed. He started to pull back but Remy only held him tighter.

“Never apologize for that, kid. At least you can be sure now that I wasn't going to hurt him.” His gaze drifted away from Roman and back to Patton with a teasing smirk. “I'm a little offended you forgot me though. Bitch, I work hard to make sure this face isn't forgettable.”

Remy dropped onto the worn sofa, pulling Patton down with him. Roman stared bewildered as Patton curled into his chest, nearly sitting on the man’s lap as he flushed red.

“Sorry—I just—” Patton stumbled over his words. “That night was—a lot. I don't remember much, honestly.”

“Don’t stress yourself out, kid. You get a pass this time since I was able to jolt your memory.” Remy chuckled and his eye glowed a soft pink as Patton became increasingly flustered. “I know that night must feel like a lifetime ago for you. You’re a whole new person it seems. Name's Patton now, huh?”

Patton chewed his lip nervously as he looked up at Remy. He shifted, glancing down at the ground and he nodded.

Remy hooked a finger underneath Patton’s chin, tipping his head up again. “It suits you, babe. You look real good.”

A bright redness flooded over Patton's face and Roman stared in confusion as he didn’t hesitate to bury his face into the strange man's chest. Virgil dropped his hand from blocking Roman and Roman's eyes darted between his friend’s relaxed expressions, unable to even process the scene playing out before him.

“I don’t know what you think you have to worry about.” Remy cooed into Patton’s ear. “If Virgil’s not telling you that every day, he’s doing you dirty. As gorgeous as you are, you deserve that and more.”

“Rem—” Virgil growled and Roman could see redness dust his cheeks.

“I'm only speaking the truth, girl. You better step up your game if you want to keep him.” Remy smirked at Virgil’s glare as Patton leaned tiredly into his shoulder. He flashed wide, innocent eyes up at Virgil he ran a hand gently through Patton's hair. “Oh, come on. Did I say something you didn't like, Virge?”

“Don’t play innocent, Rem.” Virgil growled, crossing his arms as he leaned into the wall behind him. “It's not a good look on you.”

“That’s fine.” Remy winked up at him. “The beautiful man hanging off my shoulder makes up for any of my own flaws, babes.”

A wave of exhaustion rushed over Roman as he sensed that the danger had passed. His shoulders slumped as his adrenaline levels started to crash, swaying on his feet. “Can someone please explain to me what's going on?”

“Remy helped me get Patton out of the castle when we first rescued him, Roman.” Virgil put a hand on his shoulder, steadying him. "He's the only reason we got Patton out."

“Why would you do that?” Roman asked, unable to catch his tongue before he recognized his unfortunate choice of phrasing. He glanced up to see Remy biting him at Roman seriously. “I apologize. I didn’t mean to offend—”

“He's kind of a nervous thing for a prince. Isn’t he?” Remy smirked at Virgil before looking up at Roman. “Ain't that deep sweetheart. I got a soft spot for kids. Can't stand seeing them in a tough spot like that.”

"Roman," Virgil nodded to Remy with a smile. “He works with Emile to keep kids off the street, princey.”

“With Emile?” Roman’s head started to swim, overwhelmed by the thought of the kind man in the woods consorting with this powerful fae who apparently held dominion over the entire underbelly of the dark city. " It doesn't make sen—"

Virgil nodded patiently, allowing Roman to lean into him. " I know it's a lot, princey."

“You told your prince about Emile?” Remy asked seriously. “Didn’t know you a death wish, Virge. Man might be a saint, but even he has his boundaries.”

“Emile’s aware he knows, Rem.” Virgil smiled, flipping his hair out of his face. "Not that you're actually concerned."

"Not at all, girl. But if that man ever loses his shit, you better bet I'm going to have a front row seat." Remy grinned, leaning comfortably into Patton. “Your head is still attached to your shoulders though, so I guess I didn't miss much.”

“I barely made it out with my life, but no surprise, princey had Emile wrapped around his finger by the end of night.” Virgil chuckled. “Not that Emile will ever admit it.”

“I'm shocked, like for reals girl.” Remy eyed him with a curious glimmer in his eyes. “I mean I know the guy’s about a dangerous an angry kitten but man hates the royal family as much as the Fair Folk do. How'd you convince him to even let you get that close?”

Roman winced, guiltily dropping his gaze at the comment.

“Well, don't get a shy on me now. I'm actually looking for real answers here."

Tipping his head up, Roman was surprised to see Remy’s wide grin as he stared over at him. The man’s dark hair hung low over his eyes as he stroked Patton’s hair and his aura was still filled with mystery, but Roman was shocked to see his expression was surprisingly soft as he watched Roman.

“Listen, I'm not big into shaming people, especially for something that happened long before they were born.” Remy smiled at him. “If Virgil and Emile aren't evidence enough, I don't mind humans so long they don't mind me.”

“Earlier, when you threatened Virgil, you called me your enemy.” Roman slowly lifted his head. "The Fair Folk may be many things, but liars they are not. I don't expect any less that hostility, given the legacy I carry, but I'd prefer we be honest with each other."

“You brought a dangerous weapon into my home Metal notwithstanding, I don’t appreciate the thought of being slashed to ribbons, babe.” Remy pointed seriously to the sheath around his waist. “In that moment, I truly didn't know yet if you were friend or foe."

Roman flushed at the realization of Remy’s perspective. “I'm sorry. I didn’t think—”

“We're cool. Don't you fret that pretty little head of yours." Remy smirked at him. “You more than proved you’re capable of self-restraint, and if Virgil’s willing to vouch for you, I know you’re decent.”

Roman stared at him incredulously. “Just like that?”

“Kid's got impossible standards,” Remy’s smile widened as he shot a glance at Virgil. The man's eyes glimmered a bright pink as he turned a sharp-toothed grin up to Roman. Power radiated off the man as he leered up at Roman playfully, sending a shudder down his spine. “I mean, don't let my pretty smile distract you. You walked into the home of the biggest crime bosses in the city, my dear prince. Not to mention, I’m a powerful fae who you clearly believed would have no love for you and your family. And yet, you stepped into my lair without a second though. All on Virgil's word, I assume?”

Roman gave a quick nod, glancing at Virgil leaning against the wall, flushed proudly as he stared at Roman. “That’s true.”

“Exactly. Kid's words is good.” Remy smirked, flashing a playful glance up at Virgil. “For anything but relationship advice anyway. That bit he's pretty shit at.”

“Hey—” Virgil stepped forward in protest. "Don't you dare make this about—"

“Bitch, please.” Remy quipped, leaning into Patton as if to make a point. “Trust me. The day you own up to your own bullshit excuses, I'll roll over dead."

“Whatever.” Virgil growled, glancing cautiously down at Patton’s wide-eyed look as he looked between them in confusion.

Remy smiled and leaned back, content to get under Virgil’s skin. “Now, are you going to tell me why you ruined the perfectly good night of debauchery I had ahead of me or did you just interrupt my fun?”

“I need a favor, Rem.” Virgil muttered, eyes darkening as he remembered why they were there.

“Yes. Thank you, Virgil.” Remy replied wryly, looking between Virgil and Roman. “I've gathered that much. What exactly do you need?”

“Our friend is missing and we need to find him as soon as possible.” Virgil started cautiously, his voice breaking unevenly. "Rem, he's in trouble."

Remy sat up, suddenly interested. "Tell me more."

“He disappeared with a less-than-pleasant fae we'd had in custody—” Roman winced as Remy's eyes narrowed in on him, holding his hands up apologetically. “—who kidnapped me and who hurt Patton and Virgil. We had every reason to get him under control.”

Remy raised an eyebrow at Virgil, baring his teeth as Virgil nodded a confirmation. “What was their name?”

“Do you think you know him?” Virgil looked at him in shock.

“Not sure.” Remy sat up, his expression darkening as Patton pulled back with a sadness in his eyes. “He doesn’t belong to the Unseelie court or I'd know about the transgression, but he's got to rank high among the Seelies if they haven’t torn out his throat for pulling that kind of stunt.”

“He called himself Dee.” Roman offered. “At least, that’s what L—”

“Deceit.” Remy spat irritably. “What is that bastard up to now?”

Virgil stared at him curiously. “You do know him then?”

“Snake-faced shifter that has a big old stick right up his a—" Remy paused, his eyes flashing briefly with guilt as he seemed to think better of his words. The anger seemed to deflate out of him as he stared at the ground, lost in thought. They were quiet and when Remy finally lifted his head, his voice was docile and full of emotion. “Listen, Deceit's not actually that bad of a guy. We've all lost a lot in the last century and some of us learned to cope. Others simply didn't.”

“He has our friend, Rem.” Virgil rubbed his arm, growing tense once more. “We think they’re going to try to break the curse and we need to know where he's headed.”

“The curse? The big one binding us all?" Remy blinked, mouth agape as he stared back at them, almost losing interest as he leaned back into the sofa. “I hate to disappoint, but that can’t happen. You might as well wait for Deceit to crawl back with his tail between his legs. I can't tell you where he's going, but he's not dangerous and the curse is going to stay intact. He's missing a key part of the ritual.”

“The Elder Fae's child.” Roman muttered, dropping his gaze. Guilt fluttered in his chest as he looked up at him.

“You mean Tara's child.” Remy growled, standing up and taking a step towards Roman. "Show some respect. She had a name."

"Tara," Roman repeated the name, swallowing the lump in his throat that formed as images of Logan flashed through his mind. He dropped his gaze, barely able to contain his own emotions. "Unfortunately, that other fae—Deciet—has everything he needs to break the curse."

Roman barely flinched as a guttural growl escaped Remy and the man grabbed his collar, pushing him back roughly into the wall. “You best not be telling me what I think you are, human.”

“Remy—” Virgil’s voice sounded behind them and Roman could see his friend start to rush to them. "Stop! Let him go."

Roman held up a hand for Virgil to stop, allowing himself handled with little resistance as he started to plead with the powerful fae. “LIsten to me. I want the curse to end, too. It's not—”

“I don’t give a damn about the curse,” Remy hissed, eyes radiating bright pink light as his voice vibrated dangerously in air around them. “Are you telling me that Deceit took Logan?”

Roman hesitated for a moment, staring in shock as he watched intense emotions flittering chaotically in Remy's eyes. He stared at the fae in disbelief as his cool facade shattered before his eyes and realization washed over Roman “You know Logan?”

---

Chapter Warnings: Anxiety, Self-Doubt, Panic Attack, Memory Gaps, Choking, Knives, Fake Attempt at Killing a Major Character (No Actual Death), Over-Stimulation, Swearing (Let me know if I missed anything!)

General Taglist:

@somehow-i-got-an-account @justanotherhumanstuff @im-an-anxious-wreck

You Belong With Me Taglist:

@cas-is-a-hunter @insert-cool-blogname @ironwoman359 @i-know-im-smart @croftersphoenix @optimistic-violinist @croftersjam15 @actitus-hypoleucos @unbefuckinglieveable @justthatamount @eeveeeclair246 @taxicabinmemphis @theoddkidnextdoor @bluerosesbleedred @bowties--cool @lookingforaplacetosleep @xxpanic-at-the-everywherexx @007ardra @im-actually-ok @grayson-22 @lunatatic @hope340 @itawalrus @dwbh888

#sanders sides #sanders sides fic #sanders sides fanfiction #sanders sides fanfic #ts virgil #ts roman #ts patton #ts remy #ts shorts #You Belong With Me #villain writes

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halzore · 3 years

Text

Where you need to be.

a little bit of angst, a little bit of friendship, but most importantly the two bestest friends in Star Wars. Rex and Ahsoka

for the lovely @redrobinhoods - I may have strayed slightly from the prompt. But i hope you enjoy

(also tagging @starwarsfandomfests )

~~~

The 501st waited with bated breath. Not a sound could be heard inside the barracks, watching the holo screen unfold the story of their commander’s trial. The entire room was holding their breath, and collectively breathed a sigh of relief when Barriss Offee entered in binders. Despite the news, Rex hadn’t been seen since Wolffe had found her.

Jesse had a grin the size of Courscant on his face as he slapped Tup on the back. “We’re gonna get our commander back!” The Jollity was palpable, radiating from the walls from the relieved men. But still, no one could find Rex.

Rex had holed himself up in his room, guilt still churning in his stomach. So much for loyalty, he had betrayed one of his best friends over some bad intel. He recalled the wild look in Ahsoka’s eyes as she pleaded for Anakin to believe her, how he had seen the survival instincts take over and plunge her down into the lower levels of Courscant. He could kill Wolffe right now, for not protecting Ahsoka when she needed it most.

There was a knock on the door, the clanged around the solemn room. It slid open revealing Anakin. His eyes were empty, downcast. Rex knew it must have only meant bad news.

“She’s gone.” There was a rawness to Anakin’s voice, a visceral pain in the usually cocky man’s energy.

“She lost then.” Rex responded, dull, resigned to the ugly truth.

“No—Sh-she won.” Anakin had his hands pinched over his eyes, trying to regain control of himself, Rex looked in disbelief, at the revelation, at the crying General before him. “But she left!”

Rex looked around the small room, trying to comprehend the breaking news. “Left sir?”

“Left the kriffing Jedi order.” Anakin was truly blinking back tears at this point, rubbing his hand over his face to distract from the fact. “You have to tell the boys, I-I… just can’t” Anakin left the doorway.

Solemnity raked its claws inside Rex’s chest. A sudden feeling of mourning for his lost Commander gripping him so wholly. A weight pooled inside his heart as he stood up to go to the barracks. His head was buzzing, unfocussed on his journey, only on the journey of how they had got here. The buzzing compounded as he grew close and closer to the celebratory ruckus of his men. How was he supposed to tell them, their commander, their friend, their lifeline had gone. Left on her own accord.

The room went silent as Rex entered. The eyes and expectations of his brother looming in the air.   “I have some bad news.” The words were getting caught in his throat, a rare occurrence for the Captain of the 501st. “Ahsoka she— The commander won’t be returning to us for personal reasons.”

Rex could see the concerned faces blossom into concerned inquiry. Rex just held up his hand, the sadness truly reaching his eyes then. And he left the room to grieve.

~~~

Yerbana was a victory, and an enjoyable one at that. Rex hadn’t had the opportunity as of late, to rub Cody’s face in it. It was a win win in his eyes. The mission went just like any of Skywalker’s other missions, chaotic with a dash of the dramatic. The generals were in a meeting, so Rex got the post-mission procedures underway without them. It was a smooth process by now. With what felt like thousands of battles under his belt, and 501st Vets who had been with Rex since the very beginning. He had lost good men along the way, but that was the reality of war.

The comm on Rex’s wrist blinked. “Rex here,”

“Rex, its Anakin. I have something to tell you.” There it was, that playful lilt in his voice that only ever meant trouble.

“Go ahead sir.”

“It’s Ahsoka,” Rex’s heart stopped beating, “She’s back.” Rex stared at his comm in disbelief, eyes wide.

All tasks were hurried, plans for a big project hastily sketched out. The whole battalion was a buzz. The older clones excited to see their favourite commander, swapping stories with the shinies who never got to work with her. The paint was cracked out from gathering dust in the stores, the drop sheets were laid down and the boys got to work.

Rex was flying on elation, seeing his Commander again. Being promoted to commander himself and hastily being shipped out to Mandalore. But it didn’t matter, he had his little’un back where he could watch her six.

~~~

The adrenalin of flying in the LAAT had ever felt as sweet. Ahsoka plunging into the Mandalorian atmosphere.

“Race ya to the surface.” The giddiness of having her back was unparalleled. Rex even laughed at her. She hadn’t changed a bit.. Well maybe a bit.

Even since the passing months, Ahsoka and Rex fought so intuitively, from campaigns of practice. But Rex noticed something different about her. The vigour and the depth to her had deepened. As if she knew what she was fighting for, for the first time in her life. Walking taller, finally wearing some armour, decked out with her new lightsabers. He noticed the experience that had settled in her eyes, focussing her as she fought against the red clad mandalorians. Ahsoka walked with her head held tall, an equal in a room full of warriors.

“‘Soka.” She turned her attention from Bo-Katan to her Captain. “You’ve grown up.” She gave him a quiet smile, the first of it’s kind he had seen in a long time. Rex wrapped a quick arm around her, pulling her roughly into his side, the typical brotherly hug. She punched him in the chest plate in jest.

“Wow Rex,” She rolled her eyes dramatically. “I’m really glad your eyes are working. It’s useful to see when you want to win a battle.” Rex just grinned at her. He had missed this, missed his Padawan.

Rex walked into the briefing room, content with whatever the future would bring. Because he was where he needed to be. Right beside his best friend, who came back to him after all.

#rex and ahsoka #not a ship lol #redrobinhood #v day exchange #How to tag #no one knows #star wars fandom fests

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satan-stop-laying-on-my-laptop · 4 years

Text

𖤍『𝕙𝕖𝕒𝕧𝕖𝕟||𝕊𝕚𝕞𝕖𝕠𝕟』𖤍

TRIGGER WARNING FOR VOMIT!

Pairing: Simeon X M!Reader

___________________________________________________________________

You nervously watched the clock at the front of the classroom that was full of demons, you and most importantly, Simeon, your crush ever since you’ve arrived in Devildom for the exchange program.

Thing is, you loved the angel so very much, but you knew he wouldn’t reciprocate your feelings. After all, he was an angel of The Lord, The Lord your parents told you that he would throw you away from the pearly white gates into hell for liking guys. Now, here you are, sitting in Devildom with your angelic crush, that probably would hate you if word of your feelings ever got out.

You always tried to deny your feelings towards the beautiful angel at first, avoiding eye contact and convincing yourself it was just the anxiety of meeting a new friend. Then those feelings got stronger and you could no longer deny it: You, (F/N) (L/N) are in love with Simeon, one of The Lord’s angels. You couldn’t resist loving him. He was perfect. Dark hair, clear dark skin that was nothing less than perfection, a body that looked like a master sculptor created him, his soothing voice that never failed to make you weak in the knees and his eyes, his beautiful blue eyes that captivated you and stared straight into your soul.

You didn’t even realize the bell rang until your incubus friend, (Name), tapped your shoulder. Snapping out of your little trance, you look up at your demon friend, who was looking at you with a concerned glint in his mischievous eyes.

“Hey (Y/N), you okay? You’ve been spacing out lately…” He asked, worried. You nodded with a sheepish smile on your face.

“Yeah, I just got a lot on my mind…” You replied as you began to shove your books in your book bag. Your friend nodded before asking something that would cause you trouble later.

“Do you wanna talk about it? We could head to the music room if you want. It’s usually empty.”

It was a compelling offer. You could tell your closest friend here about what’s been going on in your conflicted brain, full of toxic thoughts, and feel some of the weight of your burden lift off your shoulders.

“Yeah, Let’s go.” You said after a bit of thought. Smiling, you stood up from your seat, pushing your chair before beginning to follow your friend to the music, which was close to your next class so you didn’t mind a quick vent session here. Sitting on the bench in front of the piano, your friend looks at you, as if to say ‘The stage is yours’. Taking a deep breath, you began to pour out your heart.

“Well, you see...I really like Simeon, like- not even like, it’s more like love. I’ve tried to ignore these feelings but I- I can’t! They won’t go away and I want to act on them, but he’s an angel of the LORD! A man my parents told me would banish me to the pits of HELL for even liking men in the romantic sense! I- I just don’t know...I don’t want to ruin the friendship I have with him because of my feelings. I don’t want him to see me as a disgusting pervert who likes men…” You vented these feelings to your friend, stopping once the one minute bell rang, signalling for everyone to hurry to class. Standing up, (M/N) smiled and patted your head.

“I gotta go, but thanks for telling me! Let’s talk more about this later.” The way he acted as he left the room left you confused and worried. What’s with this hurried attitude of his? It’s weird.

Little did you know, you’d find out during lunch.

You sigh as you exited the music room and briskly walked to your Devildom History class, which you shared with Solomon and again, Simeon. You loved yet hated that class. You loved the subject and the fact you had two friends that sat next to you, but the teacher’s voice made you sleepy and Solomon is a chaotic bastard, but you had to resist the urge to backhand the bastard sorcerer because Simeon was there and you didn’t him to think you were aggressive.

Entering your class as the bell rang, you took your seat next to Simeon and across from Solomon, Solomon let out a hum as he watched you sit down in your seat. It wasn’t often you came in late. It’s happened a few times but that’s because you were either using the restroom or had to give papers to a teacher during passing period, but usually you would text him or Simeon if you were gonna be a little later than usual.

“(Y/N), Where were you?” Solomon asked, looking at you curiously. You shifted in your seat nervously, fumbling over your words as you attempted to make up an excuse as to why you were late. As much as you hated lying, you couldn’t let them know about the little vent session you had because you knew he would ask your friend later about what went on.

“O-Oh, I just got caught up talking to someone who missed a day and needed the notes.” You lied through your teeth with a smile, praying that your lie was convincing enough for him to noy question you further. Giving you a suspicious glance, he somehow knew you didn’t want to talk about what actually went down.

“Oh okay, I was about to ask Simeon here if you even showed up to class.” He hummed as he looked over at Simeon, who nodded with a smile.

“Yes, he was here last period. However, (Y/N), you seemed really out of it. Are you okay?” He asked as he looked at you, a slight glimmer of concern sparkled in his cerulean eyes. Your face heated up a little as you looked to your desk and nodded, avoiding eye contact with the angel you loved oh so dearly.

“Yeah, just tired, I guess…” You answered as you reached into your bag, grabbing your notebook and pencil case while the teacher entered the room and headed to the front, which was your cue to open your notebook to begin taking notes once the teacher began to teach.

Devildom History flew by quickly since the notes were short and sweet and you guys had gotten a simple worksheet to do with our table, so it was a breeze for you three. However, next was lunch, which would bring you the most despair.

Walking into the cafeteria, you immediately noticed that other demons were looking at you weirdly and whispering among themselves which made you nervous. What were they talking about? Usually, you wouldn't worry about it, but something in your gut told you it wasn't something nice.

You tried to deny that disgusting feeling in your gut that made you wanna vomit out whatever was in your stomach. You were doing so well until halfway to the lunchroom, you ended up hearing what the other students were talking about.

"Didn't you hear? (Y/n) has a crush on Simeon." Hearing those words felt so wrong. There was no way they could've known that. You only told one person-...oh.

You stopped in your tracks, Simeon and Solomon turned to face you, since they noticed you fell behind. Simeon frowned as he walked over to you, clearing not hearing the whispers from the others.

"(Y/N), are you-" You didn't even stay to let him finish the sentence and you bolted to the nearest boy's restroom, throwing yourself into the first open stall you saw and locking it. Tears were falling down and you felt so damn sick. You couldn't believe it, that bastard betrayed your trust and told EVERYONE about something you weren't ready to tell anyone, this took you months to tell him and now within one class period, the entire school fucking knew about your dirty secret.

Soon enough, you collapsed on the dirty bathroom floor and began to throw up in the toilet, your body couldn't handle the stress anymore and you just puked out stomach acid since you truthfully didn't eat much this morning. Once the vomiting stopped, you leaned against the stall door, panting heavily as tears streamed down your face in great amounts.

You thought you would have more time to yourself so you could cry but turns out no one in Devildom, The Celestial Realm or the Human world planned for that to fucking happen since you faintly heard the bathroom door open and someone step inside. Quickly, you cover your mouth, hoping you could muffle your sobs enough so the person who just entered the bathroom could do what they needed to do and leave without questioning why you were crying in a bathroom stall. Again, you weren't that lucky.

"(Y/N)? Are you in here?" You tensed up heavily when you heard his voice. You were scared to death. No, it wasn't Diavolo or Lucifer. It was Simeon. Out of everyone, it had to be the guy who probably hated you now. You decided to keep your pride and stay quiet, praying that he would leave.

"(Y/N), I...I heard what they were saying," Are you fucking sERIOUS- "and, uhm...I want you to know that I'm not mad and this isn't going to tear us apart, if anything, if what they said is true...I like you too. More than friends."

What he just admitted made you throw your head back in surprise, causing you to hit your head on the fucking stall door, which made you and Simeon startled.

Simeon...loves you back? You were so sure he would've hated you for loving him yet… he feels the same way.

"(Y/N)?!" In a heartbeat, he was outside that stall door, knocking on it. You gently sighed and shakingly stood up, holding onto the metal bar on the side for stability so you didn't fall.

"...did...you mean what you said?" You asked meekly through the door. Before you come out of the bathroom stall you're hiding in, you need to make sure so you don't make a fool of yourself again.

"Of course! I wouldn't lie to you, (Y/N)..." You could hear his voice and almost knew he was telling the truth. Taking a deep breath, you gently unlocked the door and opened it, revealing your post-breakdown state to the angel you loved.

"(Y/n)! Are you okay?" Simeon's hands came to gently rest on your shoulders, his cerulean eyes scanning your frame to make sure you were okay. Gently nodding, you wipe the stray tears from your face as you steady your breathing.

"Yeah...I just was stressed that I got outed by someone I trusted." You mumbled. Simeon nodded understandingly as he pulled you to his chest, holding you close to him as he gently pressed a kiss to your forehead.

"I'm glad you love me too, I wish I could've found out through you, though."

"Believe me, me too."

We shared a brief laugh at my comment before Simeon pulled back and gently grabbed your hand, smiling sweetly at you.

"Come on, let's go get some lunch. I'm sure you're hungry, my little lamb." You smiled at the nickname and nodded.

"Alright, let's go."

____________________

Reposted from my wattpad oneshot book "devildom tales || obey me x reader"

My wattpad:strawberryenby

#obey me fluff #obey me x reader #shall we date #obey me angst #obey me simeon #obey me #obey me shall we date

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buckyownsmylife · 3 years

Text

‘till I get where you are - Bucky Barnes smut

The one where Bucky tries to convince you to run away with him.

Warnings: infidelity, reader is the cheater, Steve is the one being betrayed, smut

A/N: So this is the long awaited final part to graveyard. Per @navegandoaciegas suggestion, I just had to make our boy steal her away from Steve, even if it did hurt my heart a little bit. I considered writing an alternative version where she stays with Steve, but my muse wasn’t really feeling it - maybe some other time. Hope you guys like this one!

Y/N’s P.O.V.

It had been a weird couple of days ever since Steve caught Bucky and I in the kitchen. No matter how many times I prepared myself for this situation, I did not know what to do or say. But to my surprise, it seemed like the boys had it figured out perfectly.

And that resulted in Bucky immediately leaving me to deal with Steve and Steve pretending nothing had happened as he hoisted me up and took me to the bedroom, where he fucked me just like he did every time we had one of those sinful little sessions that initially began as his idea.

I felt guilty, just like I had felt right when we first started this. Only back then I knew everything was happening under Steve’s gaze and Bucky only wanted me for my body - actually, I wasn’t even certain of that. I thought Bucky was doing this as a favor to his old pal, because there was no way in hell Bucky Barnes was attracted to me. I could barely believe one super soldier wanted me in his bed, now the other wanted it too?

But as time went on, it became obvious that was very much the case, until it wasn’t necessarily only that anymore. What started as a sexual connection slowly built up into much more, and I was conflicted, because of course I was.

I thought I loved Steve, but could I love him and betray his trust like that?

I managed to fall asleep every night by his side on a technicality. This was what he had asked me for, after all. If he wanted Bucky to fuck me whenever he wanted to, so he could be caught by surprise when he found us, he should have known there would be times when he wouldn’t find us.

The fact that Bucky looked for the times where Steve wasn’t around could not be attributed to my own doing, now could it?

But I knew it was wrong. I just knew it. That burning acidic feeling of shame and regret bubbled inside my belly every time I had to look Steve in the eyes while his best friend’s cum still dripped from me.

But he never asked me about it, now did he? He never told me that I should warn him about what Bucky and I did when he wasn’t around, when he didn’t manage to catch us. I could very well push through this, ignore my barrier of morality and pretend everything was fine, if it wasn’t for the fact that I knew my boyfriend like the palm of my hand. And I knew this was affecting him more than I ever feared it would.

For starters, he hadn’t asked Bucky to come over once since his last mission. Ever since we started this little arrangement, three days wouldn’t go by without his best friend being invited at least once into our shared bed.

He was insecure, I could see that. And I think Bucky saw it too. I recognized the guilty look in his eyes whenever we met in the common room for breakfast, because it wasn’t too different from the one I sported on myself.

But still, he restrained himself, abstaining from raising any issues or questioning what should very well be on the table. I knew why he didn’t, though. It was because he already knew the answer, just like I already knew what was going to happen, even if I wasn’t prepared to admit it to myself yet.

I’d warned him about this. When he first approached me with the idea, I wanted to be as open-minded as possible, especially since I cared a great deal for Steve and wanted him to be as sexually fulfilled in our relationship as I could make him. But I needed to let him know how my body and mind worked, and even back then I was well aware - and made sure that he was too - that I wasn’t able to simply sleep with someone without catching feelings for them.

It was only a matter of time, but both Steve and I tried to ignore the ticking clock, pushing through like I was able to only think about Bucky’s weight on top of me when Steve was looking us over, like I didn’t know what his cum tasted like and how heavy his cock felt in my mouth, making my mouth water every time my eyes met his in the gym, like I hadn’t begun to fall in love with him between the silly little compliments he’d whisper against my skin.

And now it was too late to ignore all of that, but still, here we were. All three, pretending nothing was different in our dynamic, like a relationship and a friendship hadn’t deteriorated in all of our joined hands.

I began distancing myself from the both of them, and as much as I could see the hurt in their eyes as they realized what was going on, Steve’s gaze held a little bit of relief in it. Like he was hopeful that the growing space between our hearts would end up tearing that last thread of sentiment that still held the two of us together, without either of us having to pick up a scissor to do it ourselves.

But that still didn’t solve the problem of my relationship with Bucky, and how it would affect Steve even if we did end up falling apart.

Those were the thoughts consuming my mind all day, every day, until I managed to get some sleep next to Steve in bed. But most nights, until I was able to do so, I’d roam the deserted hallways of the tower in search of answers I’d never find outside of myself, until I decided to take a warm shower in the hopes that relaxation would find me.

I was taking off my clothes to get under the water when Bucky joined me in Steve’s walk-in bathroom.

Bucky’s P.O.V.

“Hi,” she murmured, eyes meeting mine on the reflex of the mirror in front of the both of us. “I was just about to wash up.” I gave a small smile, eyes running across her form, drinking in her figure and the warmth she brought me after so long without being alone with her. I was going crazy without it, the feeling of peace and belonging she brought me. So I didn’t even think before hugging her to my body, hiding my head in the crook of her neck from behind.

“Can I join?” When she didn’t immediately answer me, I knew it was time. We’d danced around the inevitable for too long. We needed to talk about the reality of our feelings, the reality where we had found ourselves in.

“I don’t think that would be best…” I sighed deeply, memorizing the intoxicating perfume of her own skin before finally raising my head to meet her eyes in the mirror again. I knew what I needed - what I wanted to say.

“Let’s run away. Just you and me. I’ll find a cabin in the woods. We can live a quiet life, just like we’ve always wanted.” She doesn’t ask me how I know it. I knew she remembers those midnight conversations as well as I did, long before we even started sharing a bed together. We’d grown close over cups of tea and whispered secrets, it shouldn’t have been any surprise I’d give her my heart without blinking twice.

When she didn’t answer, I turned her around to look directly at me, cradling her face between my hands, both flesh and metal. I was always careful not to hurt her, terrified of seeing any ounce of pain or fear in her eyes, but she never showed me anything other than love and care.

“C’mon, I know you want this,” I urged her, thumbs softly brushing her cheekbones, feeling my chest heavy with each breath by the intensity of the emotions in her eyes. “Don’t you want me? Don’t you want us?”

I waited with my heart on my sleeve for her to finally exhale a breathy little “yes” that was immediately swallowed by my lips descending on hers again. I was desperate to have her sweetness on my tongue, to reassure myself that this was real, and not a sickly realistic figment of my deteriorating imagination.

“Bucky, we can’t do this right now,” she whispered against my lips as I hoisted her up on the counter behind her, but I could only keep on pressing kisses against her skin, relishing in the new feeling of possessiveness that took over me as I tasted each inch of her.

“You sure? ‘Cause I can smell you dripping for me, and only me right now.” It was true, I could always smell when she was wet and it was more intoxicating than any alcohol could ever aspire to be. It made my head swirl and my entire body feel more alive than ever before. Ever since the first time I was allowed to touch her, it became increasingly more difficult to control my desires. Now, when I needed her, I needed her. And I needed her now.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

I wanted to succumb to him, I wanted it so badly - and I knew my self-control was wearing thin because I wouldn’t usually admit it to myself just how much I craved the feeling of his body on mine. But there was a more important issue here, something we had to discuss, and I knew we should have this conversation now rather than later.

“I feel like I should put on my clothes. We really need to talk about this. You can’t just drop this idea of running away and then fuck me silly so I’ll agree.” That made him smirk against my collarbones, hands slipping under my robe to slowly pry it off my shoulders.

“You know me so well,” he purred, tongue slowly licking from my collarbones up my throat until he was right by my lips again, kissing the breath away from my lungs. I couldn’t deny it any longer. He had awakened the fires of desire inside of me, and I was beyond desperate for him now.

“Is there really anything to talk about, doll? I know you can’t even sleep next to him anymore. And I can’t sleep without you.” His fingers had found my pussy, and without any sort of preamble, two slipped right in, his thumb easily locating my clit and rubbing it. “All of my nightmares are about living without you now. Please don’t make me live in them.”

I melted at the same time that he found my sweet spot, a strangled gasp somehow escaping me, despite how hard I was trying to keep quiet. And that’s when his metal hand came into play.

He covered my mouth and leaned over me, body caging me on the counter as he whispered in my ear. “I love hearing your little sounds, sweetheart, but be a bit quieter, okay? We can’t have Steve interrupting us now, especially since we’re in the middle of such an important conversation.”

I wanted to laugh, but all that got out was a mumbled version of his name, thankfully barely understandable thanks to the hand still silencing me. “Where were we? Ah, yes. You running away with me. Say that you will, baby. I’ll take good care of you. Haven’t I always? Say yes, doll. Please.”

I don’t know how the hell he expected me to be able to form any sort of answer - hell, I had no idea how he was able to speak that convincingly while fingerfucking me to a blinding orgasm, but I guess he knew my body and its limits better than I did, because before I could consciously realize, I was screaming yes over and over again against the cold palm of his hand, body writhing desperately over the counter.

“We’re gonna be so happy, doll. I promise you,” he whispered against my temple before depositing a kiss there, while I dramatically tried to catch my breath. “But right now, I really want to taste this glistening little pussy.”

As his hand left my face, I had to bite down on my own fist to stop the loud moan that threatened to escape me at the mere sight of James Buchanan Barnes falling on his knees in front of me, animalistically licking his lips at what awaited between my spread open legs.

Bucky’s P.O.V.

She looked like a fucking meal, all ready and wet for me to taste. And now she was mine and only mine, forever and ever. “You know…” I started, tracing her outer lips with one of my metal fingers as I watched her juices continuously drip from inside of her, making my mouth water.

“Every time I see you - it doesn’t matter who’s around - I just keep thinking about how I want to have my head between your legs.” My voice was thick with desire as I let her ponder over my confession, tongue slipping past my lips to finally taste her once I felt her muscles relaxing when the anticipation had started to decrease.

“F-Fu-uu-uck, BUCKY!” And now they were tense again. I could feel the solid muscles of her thighs under the palms of my hands as they roamed across her spread legs, forcing her to stay that way for me.

“God, I love your taste, sweetheart. No one - nothing can ever compare.” It was the truth. I loved her juices. Ever since the first time I got to eat her sweet pussy, I craved to be sweeping my tongue over her lips, collecting her wetness all the damn time. It was easily my favorite meal and hobby, and I had no idea how Steve could spend a second of his day without getting on his knees for her.

“It’s just like candy. And you’re so fucking wet, always so fucking wet.” I chuckled against her cunt at the gasps and moans that she tried to contain but failed miserably, relishing every bite of pain that I felt when her fingers pulled on my locks a bit more forcefully. She thrashed and twisted on the marble counter while I managed to hold her open without any difficulty, smiling at each lick I got to give across her pussy.

“Fuck, you look so good like this.” Stopping only to thrust two of my fingers in her, I admired the way her pussy so easily swallowed them up before going back to suck on her clit just the way I knew would make her tighten around me. “Don’t close your eyes,” I ordered when she tried to do just so, recognizing all of the tell-tale signs I’d long memorized that warned me of how truly close she was to creaming around my face. “I want to see you cum for me. Cum for me, baby.”

This time, I didn’t stay to drag out her orgasm this time. I needed her, needed to be inside of her, so the second that I felt her orgasm, I dragged out my fingers and rose to my full height, hands immediately making quick work of my jeans.

“Don’t you ever wear underwear?” She questioned in a lazy voice that made it abundantly clear just how fucked out she already was, and I had to laugh as I made sure to adjust her body just how I needed it to have her.

“Not ever since we started fucking.” It was the truth. Specifically, ever since Steve commented on wanting to step it up a notch, I decided to skip wearing boxers altogether, if only for the time that it saved me where I could be enjoying her before he appeared. This time though, I was particularly grateful for it, since my cock ached in my fist, terribly stimulated without any actual sort of stimulation whatsoever.

“Fuck, you’re so hard,” she sighed, right as I rubbed the head of my member between her pussy lips and started to press in. As always, it felt amazing. It felt like being connected to her, and that was all I’ve ever wanted, ever since Steve introduced me to her.

“For you, doll. Only for you.” She gasped so prettily at my words, and a silly smile took over my face as I started thrusting inside of her, but when she did it again, hands holding onto the back of my shoulders to keep herself up, I got worried.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

“What’s wrong? Am I hurting you?” The worry in his tone had me smiling against the skin of his shoulder, where I had hugged myself to, before quickly shaking my head to calm his anxious mind.

“No! No, Bucky… You’ve done nothing… wrong, ah!” The second he learned I wasn’t in pain, his thrusts resumed, and each time he bottomed out, he managed to hit that sweet spot that had me struggling to keep myself sane while holding tightly to the man that was driving me crazy. It didn’t take long for him to figure it out.

“Oh, you like this, huh?” I nodded eagerly, still holding on to him like he was my lifeboat. “Awn, you love how I fuck you, huh, sweetheart? You love that it’s me who’s pounding you inside your ex-boyfriend’s bathroom.”

The addition wasn’t missed. But in the throes of passion, as I felt my toes curl and tried to keep my moans in by biting on Bucky’s skin while he eased my orgasm with his gentle, soft coos, I couldn’t find it in myself to care.

Later, when the post-orgasm clarity cleared my mind, I still couldn’t.

“Look at me, baby,” Bucky begged, out-of-breath and almost whiny and it was enough to have me needy again. So I pushed myself away from his muscular chest, wanting to see his beautiful face when he found his bliss just as much as he seemed to need to watch mine, and the second our eyes met, his pace quickened, the bottles and knick-knacks around us on the counter threatening to fall over and wake Steve up. It was clear that he was reaching the point of no-return, desperation dripping from each and every one of his movements.

“You’re mine, doll. You’re already mine, you’ve been mine for a long time, it just took you awhile to realize it.” The truth behind his words shocked me, revealing parts of myself that I had tried to ignore up until then. But he was right. I was Bucky’s, mind, body and soul. And it was time he came to collect what was rightfully his.

Another orgasm rose up so quickly, it took me by surprise, but Bucky knew me so well by now that he covered my lips just before I screamed my release, alerting Steve of our actions. “Shhh… Keep it in… Good girl.”

My pussy milking him, it was impossible for him to resist much longer. I knew he was about to cum when he looked at me with hazy eyes, mouth slightly open before begging, “Kiss me, kiss me.”

Of course, I did. I don’t think I’d ever be able to refuse him a kiss again, not ever since the first time his lips touched mine.

For a few seconds, it was only the sounds of our thumping hearts and breathless pants, my cunt still throbbing around his release as he cradled my face in his hands. Looking up at him to see the love in his eyes, all I could see, all I could feel was warmth. Like this was right. Like I was right where I needed to be. And it was time for me to admit it, both to Bucky and me.

“Let’s do it,” I broke the silence in the bathroom. “Let’s run away together. I love you. I’m scared, but I love you.” And as hard as it was to admit, the love I felt for the man in front of me left no space in my heart to regret the man I was about to leave behind.

#my fics #bucky barnes smut #smut #bucky barnes #bucky barnes reader smut #bucky barnes reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes reader insert #bucky barnes reader inserts #bucky barnes fics #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes fanfiction

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sup-hoes-its-me · 4 years

Text

Pain II (Kakashi x Reader)

A/N: part two of pain. okay, so this one is kinda sad, maybe i made Kakashi seem a little too harsh but thats the story. Hope you guys like. btw, check out my masterlist link I have many other fanfics for Naruto.

word count: 4500~

Part One/Part Two

Kakashi and I stood at the gates of the village after our mission. The entire time, I couldn’t stop thinking about what Tsunade had said to me. Kakashi and I were soulmates. After all this time, I finally knew who my soulmate was; a friend, a fellow shinobi, and most importantly, my long time hero.

I would be lying if I said I never felt something more than friendship for the man.

Even though we have been friends for long over 10 years, I felt almost awestruck on this mission, always watching him out of the corner of my eye, getting flustered when he would compliment me on my jutsu, feeling almost exposed underneath my fishnets and bandages.

I’ve always felt something special with Kakashi, but this was beyond my belief. I practically burst at the seams from being so excited and ecstatic.

But that feeling wouldn’t last for long.

He stopped just before the gates and sighed, turning to look at me. His hands were deep in his pants pockets as he stared deep in thought, seemingly exhausted, at me. I blinked. “Everything okay, Kakashi?” I asked tentatively, raising a brow.

“Y/N, you were acting erratic and strange the entire mission,” he said. “What’s up?”

I bit my lip and my eyes shifted to stare at the pebbles in the dirt. “I don’t know what you mean. I thought I did a good job…” He has complimented me many times, and I saved him more than once from an enemy in combat.

He exhaled, propping himself up on one leg. “It’s not that you didn’t do a good job. You just weren’t yourself. Is everything okay?” he asked, and for a moment, I actually believed he was concerned for me. My heart fluttered, and I found my breath getting shallower with every second.

Was this the right time? Really, was any time different from the rest? The words would be the same, the marks would always be the same.

“It’s just that Tsunade told me something right before we went on the mission. It’s been on my mind since then,” I told him, albeit very hesitant. I guess this was the moment that would make my life complete. I always fantasized about meeting my soulmate, but now it was real.

First I would tell him that I knew. We would check our marks to compare them, and realize they match. We then would confess we have both felt the connection for a long time, and hug each other and he would say he loves me and I love him and kiss and hug and go back to the village to tell everyone the good news.

That was the plan anyway.

“We are soulmates. When I was in the infirmary last week, she saw my mark and said it matches yours,” I smiled and told him, my cheeks no doubt turning red from all the heat, and my lips curling into the most excited smile.

Only Kakashi didn’t smile.

“I’ve known we were soulmates since our last mission together.”

“That was weeks ago…why-why didn’t you tell me? If you knew wouldn’t you be excited to-”

“No. There was obviously a reason why I didn’t tell you,” he told me, shifting once again on his feet. “Sometimes, soulmates aren’t meant to be Y/N.” He seemed almost pained as he said those words, closing his eyes and lowering his voice. My heart started to race, and suddenly I felt all the weight of my fear and hopelessness sink down onto me.

I was upset, crushed, hurt, and betrayed. My stomach was rolling, tightening in knots until I felt like I would throw up.

“How could you do this to me?”

“Y/N, there are other people in the world.” That was all he said. I could feel his gaze on me, his eye digging into my skin.

I clenched my fists by my sides, and sucked in all my pride for a moment. I felt absolutely pathetic. So angry with myself for getting caught up in a man as closed off as him. For letting myself get invested and then thrown into the dirt like garbage.

Tears threatened to spill over, and I felt that painful lump growing in my throat, taunting me. Stupid, bitch, just cry. It doesn’t matter what he thinks of you anymore.

“If you knew that we were soulmates, why wouldn’t you say something?” I asked, tears in the corners of my eyes. I angrily wiped them away, refusing to look him in the eyes as I stared at the ground. “I wasted all this fucking time looking for my soulmate when I could have been free from wondering and questioning everything if I knew this is how you felt about me. I remained loyal to you, Kakashi. I put my all into the hopes of meeting you, the one person I’ve staked my life on, only to be rejected and ignored, to not be wanted?”

I sobbed into my palm, a scream building up in my throat. When he said nothing, maybe because he didn’t care, I couldn’t hold myself in any longer. I cried into the air, clutching tightly at my chest and squeezing my eyes shut.

“You disgust me, Kakashi Hatake,” I yelled at him. “You might be a great shinobi, but you lack humanity.”

“Listen, Y/N, I know what I did is wrong, but you don’t understand.”

“Don’t understand what? That you are depriving me of my destiny? That you just single-handedly ruined my entire life?”

“If you would stop talking and let me speak, you would know,” he said firmly, staring directly at my weak figure. He didn’t seem to care about the tears running furiously down my cheeks and the way my hands and knees trembled. “I don’t love you. I never have, and unfortunately, I never will.”

To say my already damaged heart broke in that moment was an understatement. That confession was more painful than any fight I have ever been in. The color fled from my cheeks to the point where I felt cold and empty. I froze completely, unable to respond, unable to move. All I could do is watch him with wide eyes, tears still dripping hot down my face.

“I thought it would be easier for you to never know than be rejected,” he finally explained, his eyes hardening on my own. “I’m sorry, but I have to go. If you’d like me to tell Tsunade to cancel our missions together here on forth, I will.”

Out of rage, I grabbed the crystal that hung around my neck, yanking off of me with all the strength I could muster in my pathetic state. The snap stung the back of my neck, but it didn’t matter. Nothing hurt as badly as his cruel words.

“Take your shit necklace, and stay the fuck away from me.” I threw the crystal at his chest, and he caught it. His eyes fell, and for a moment, he almost looked regretful, saddened even. “Give it to someone you actually give a fuck about.”

He silently tucked the charm into his pocket.

It seemed that was it for us.

After looking into my eyes one more time, seeing how broken and the spirit I held had left my body, he sighed deeply. His hands clenched into fists by his sides multiple times, tensing over and over again. For an incredulous second, I wondered if he was going to hit me. But he never did.

He nodded, and with that, set off towards the village.

I waited for a while as I sank to my knees, just sitting on the ground crying into my palms. My stomach hurt so badly, and eventually, I emptied my stomach onto the ground beside me. I just cried harder, choking on my own saliva and the air that I was hurriedly breathing in.

It was so hard to remain strong in the face of capricious invasion of my heart.

My entire world just fell apart right in front of me. The man I was supposed to be with was only cruel and disgusted towards me, pushing me to the brink of tears and heartbreak and then abandoning me. I was so fucking stupid. How could I bring myself to trust someone like him? He seemed kind, but everyone has their rough moments, those they hide from others until the most bitter of times.

I stood up shakily off the ground when I didn’t feel like I was going to die anymore. I walked into the village, keeping my head down so no one would see my tears. People looked at me, and a few even asked where Kakashi was, since we were supposed to be coming home together from our mission. Those shinobi only made me walk faster, heading right to the training grounds.

Gai stood with his team as they trained a while away. I sniffled as I approached him, and he turned his head to find me, pitiful with blotchy eyes and cheeks and dirt all over me.

“Y/N! What has happened? You look injured!” He exclaimed, acting quick to hold my shoulders with his firm hands. I only sobbed at the sound of his voice and his concern for me. He wrapped an arm around my shoulder and walked me over to the bench a few feet away, sitting me down softly and taking a tentative seat beside me.

I worried he would be disgusted by how dirty and messy I was, or how my breath kind of smelled like vomit. But he didn’t care. He was a good man, and my best friend. He just wrapped an arm around my shoulders and leaned down to look at my face.

“What’s wrong, my little Y/N?”

I took a few seconds to catch my breath and pause my crying before saying anything. “Remember how I told you Kakashi and I are soulmates, and I-I said I would tell him soon?” I asked, and he nodded. “When I told him, he rejected me.”

“What do you mean? How could he-”

“He said that he never loved me and would never be able to,” I cried once again, tucking my face into my hands. “He said that he’s known for weeks and didn’t say anything. He said that he would make sure we never work together again, and then left me all alone by the gates and-and, Gai, he broke my heart.”

I placed a hand over my heart and winced. I never realized that heartbreak hurt this terribly.

“I-I, Y/N, I don’t know what to say. I’ve never heard of this happening before. Someone rejecting their soulmate, that’s awful. Your heart break must be unimaginable.” I wasn’t offended by his lack of words, in fact, I expected it. What is someone supposed to say? The only thing you can try to do is sympathize and comfort.

He hugged me tightly to his side.

“He’s your friend��Hasn’t he said anything to you before? Has he talked badly about me?”

“No, definitely not. Usually, he speaks so highly of you. He’s even requested you two have more missions together. I-I really don’t know why he did this.”

I hugged him too, wrapping my arms around his side and squeezing weakly. My tears dripped into his sleeve, not that he minded.

“It will be okay, Y/N. You have many friends to help you get through this,” he assured me, rubbing my back soothingly. “I will have Lee run your errands for you, and help you around town until you are feeling better, yes?”

I nodded.

We sat there for some amount of time, me just crying into his shoulder, and him continuing to reassure me that everything was okay, that my youth wasn’t wasted, and that I would work through this. His students rushed over after they were done their exercise, probably the moment they noticed their sensei wasn’t where they last saw him.

But I really didn’t want too many people knowing about this. It was embarrassing, and it was crazy that I even found it in myself to trust Gai, much less a bunch of teenagers.

“It is okay, my students! Y/N has had a rough day and because of this, Lee, I have a training task for you!” Gai told them in his usual, bold tone. I appreciated the effort he took to protect my secrecy as well as help me.

“Yes, sensei?” the boy replied obediently.

“Follow Y/N around today to make sure she is safe and help her with her errands. This mission is especially important to me, so do not fail me, my pupil!” Lee nodded firmly.

“Is everything okay, Y/N-sensei? You look like you’ve been crying,” Tenten asked me, but I only shook my head and Gai waved his hand dismissively.

“No questions. This is a matter between jounin, now back to training.”

There was nothing I could do now. Just sit here and cry, and the hopelessness of it all made me feel ten times worse. But life goes on

______________________________________

It was later in the day, around 6 when Gai knocked on the door to his dear rival’s apartment. After a minute, there was an answer, the copy-nin in his simple clothes and mask, tired from a long day of business and training with the team. He knew what was coming, it was all in his eyes which dulled under the guilt and shame.

“Gai, what’s up?”

“You and I both know what’s up, Kakashi.” The man leaned on his door frame heavily, letting out a deep sigh. He knew this was coming. “How could you do that to her? Kakashi, we’ve talked about this before; I just can’t understand what you’re trying to do.”

“You and I both know Y/N doesn’t need someone like me in her life,” Kakashi sighed, covering his eyes with his hand. “She’s a kind and sweet woman, and I’m a killer and definitely not a lover.”

“Do you really think Y/N cares? Ever since you saved her during the 3rd shinobi war, she never stops talking about you. She’s spent years trying to get to know you, and finally when she feels comfortable enough, you just throw all that effort away. She trained extremely hard to even be close to your level so you could be on missions together, she asks me almost every day for old stories about you and I as children because she is just so desperate to know you.”

“You think I don’t know that, Gai?! Fuck, I’ve tried to keep myself away from her but I can’t stop going back! This fucking soul mark makes me feel like I’m going crazy.”

“What do you mean?”

“I never want to leave her alone. It’s like I need to know everything about her. Hell, I don’t know what her favorite color is or her favorite song and it’s literally killing me. I never stop thinking about her when we aren’t together, and I’m going insane.”

Gai stared at his rival with wide eyes, mouth just agape. He never knew that. Sure, he knew his friend was close to the girl, and talked to her quite often, but he didn’t know it consumed him like this. How it must have felt for Y/N this whole time as well. “For how long?” he asked.

Kakashi groaned. “Since we are kids. Since the first time I ever saw her, I haven’t been able to think straight.”

“Why did you never tell her? She’s been waiting for you too, Kakashi,” Gai questioned. “You are wasting your youth, my friend. Spend the years you have left with the woman you are meant to be with.”

The masked man banged his fist on the door, frustration boiling off his skin. No one was listening to him. “She is not meant to be with me. Whoever put these marks, made a mistake. I told you, I’m not going to burden her like that.”

“You’re hurting her a lot more by distancing yourself.”

“Gai, you don’t get it. No one gets it. Everyone I have ever loved has died. I barely have anyone in my life, and the less people the better. I’m not going to pull her into my messy life. No one deserves that.”

Gai rolled his eyes, throwing his hands in the air dramatically. How could Kakashi be so stupid and selfish? Sure, his life sucked, it was pretty fucking miserable growing up. But now he has friends; he has Gai, Naruto, Sakura, and a ton of shinobi who care about him as much as their own people.

“Love is unconditional. If she is really your soulmate, she will help you through your problems, not feel burdened by them,” he explained. “Just give the girl a chance. She deserves happiness just as much as anyone else.”

“Gai-”

“No. You love her, and I’m not just gonna stand around while you ruin both your lives. You’re the one being selfish. You’re killing this girl, and you act like it’s completely okay.”

“Gai, I will deal with it, alright?” Gai raised a brow accusingly, and Kakashi groaned again, further irritated. “I’ll apologize to Y/N. Happy?” Again, another brow raise. ‘I’ll do it, now just leave. Go train or something.”

With that, he shut the door and Gai went on his way to do a few more laps around the village before settling down for a night’s rest. He felt bad for confronting his friend, but they both knew it had to be done. Honestly, Kakashi felt terrible for what he had done, but when hasn’t he felt like a complete screw-up? He felt responsible for so many lives, and to accept Y/N’s as one of his own, he would have to face that fact that she might die. That shinobi die in battle every single day, and just like everyone else, she could fall victim too.

He didn’t know how to do this.

_________________________________

Lee followed me around for the rest of the day, and even into the next day. I got groceries for my apartment since I was away for a week, and he carried my groceries. He walked me to the laundromat carrying my clothes. We organized my ninja tools. I got my wounds from the mission fixed up in the infirmary. Anything to get my mind off what happened. Not that it helped.

Nothing seemed to help. Even with my own personal assistant to do my bidding, I was broken up and felt so defenseless. I stayed in my house all alone for five days after that, just so I didn’t have to risk running into him.

I only decided to venture out to get some fresh air and calm myself down. Peace and quiet outside in the nice weather would surely cheer me up. The walk around the village was quiet and somber. I tried to focus on something else like the sound of my feet on the ground or the wind blowing past my ears, but really the only thing on my mind was Kakashi. His face, and the way he looked at me as he told me he never loved me, never cared about me. I walked about a block before I had to stop to catch my breath. My lungs were squeezing tightly in my chest as I thought about the man. I was reasonably upset, and once again felt like crying.

All I wanted to do was cry, but there was too much work to do. I would probably be assigned another mission soon, most definitely not with Kakashi, but instead some other shinobi I didn’t know. At least Kakashi was unique and I wouldn’t be reminded of him in any other ninja.

Unfortunately, I couldn’t even have a nice walk alone without being painfully interrupted.

“Y/N, what’s up?! Haven’t seen you in weeks!” Naruto… and he just happened to be with Sakura and the man I was trying to take my mind off. I waved to him very nervously, and he rushed up to me, his smile bright like the sun and his eyes filled with enthusiasm. It was actually a bit overwhelming, the contrast between us. “How are you doing?”

“Naruto, how about we keep going? We have work to-”

“Come on, Kakashi-sensei! I haven’t seen Y/N in like 3 weeks because you guys went on that long mission and then when you came back home, she was in the infirmary for a week, right?” Naruto whined. I was confused though. I wasn’t in the infirmary for a week, instead in my house for a while crying my eyes out. Kakashi must have told people who asked about me that to avoid embarrassment and prying eyes.

Kakashi sighed his eyes downcast so they didn’t have to reach mine. I couldn’t help but look at him, and it brought all my feelings back on. My chest tightened up and I rubbed my knuckles anxiously. After a week of crying, there was nothing left but pain and anxiety. I think the medical nin with them noticed this because Sakura quickly snatched up Naruto’s wrist to pull him away from me.

“Naruto, why don’t we hang out with Y/N another time? I’m really excited for our sparring match after all,” she chimed in, and no doubt she was pinching the boy on the arm to help him get the hint. He yelped, but nodded like a little puppy.

“Sorry for bothering you, Y/N! Maybe we can go get ramen sometime soon! We all miss you!” That cheered me up just a little bit, that the kids missed me. At this point I felt like some useless piece of shit. Gai only cared about me because he was too noble to leave me stranded. Kakashi, who I thought had a connection with me didn’t actually care at all.

Kakashi didn’t follow.

“Mind taking a walk with me?”

“After what you said to me, no fucking way,” I told him, but my heart told me to. I was away for him for too long, and it was making me go crazy. Just seeing his face made me have an intense emotional reaction.

“Y/N, we really should talk about this.”

Of course he wanted to talk. Probably to clear his own conscience. I bit my lip and thought for a long moment before mumbling, “Five minutes, and after that I’m never talking to you ever again, Kakashi.” I was weak, yes. If I could actually stand up for myself, I never would have gone on a walk with him, but again I felt so hopeless. I was at the mercy of this selfish man.

All my life, I thought I was stronger than love. That it could never touch me and ruin me. I would be a strong kunoichi until the day I died without any regrets. Yet, the older I got, the more I craved someone’s attention. I would get lost in my thoughts during meetings thinking about someone giving me attention, kisses, hugs, cuddles; touches in the dark under the sheets and sneaky glances in public, inside jokes we would always remember. I guess I wasn’t immune to desire.

Kakashi made me feel special, and I wanted him. He was calm and collected, but his mind and heart ran deeper than anyone could imagine. I wanted everything about him without fault.

I couldn’t help but follow him.

We walked in silence for a minute, and I thought about how he was wasting his five minutes. Really, even if he took longer than that to explain himself, I wouldn’t fight it.

Even though he broke his heart, I still needed to hear him speak and be near him. I was a fool, but so was he.

We stopped under the shade of an old tree, and his eyes rose to stare at the sky. My heart hung onto every second waiting for words to pass from his lips. I was desperate for some substance, a new chapter of the story.

“Please take back the necklace. It was a gift, and I don’t take those back.” He held out the crystal to me. I stared at it angrily, it acting a reminder of the good times we had together when I held a shred of hope that he actually did love me like I loved him.

“I don’t want it anymore.”

“Please, Y/N. You’ve never taken it off since I gave it to you, and it’s protected you up til this point.”

“It didn’t protect me from you crushing my heart into pieces, did it?”

“Just- god, just take it back,” he pleaded as he pushed the charm closer to me. I snatched it back out of his hand and put it into my pocket. I didn’t exactly want it anymore, but it was beautiful, and the memories were too good to forget.

“I’m sorry for what I said to you last week.”

“Kakashi, I can’t forgive you,” I confessed, my eyes stuck on my feet. “I know you’ve never seen it, but I’ve dedicated so much of my life to you, and you never cared.”

“Y/N, that’s what I needed to explain. I do care about you. You’re my soulmate; how can I not?” He paused, and I couldn’t help but scoff. He didn’t care that we were soulmates last week, in fact, he seemed to loathe it with a passion.

“How can I believe you? You already said what you wanted to say.”

He rubbed his face, sighing deeply into his hand. His energy felt broken, torn down and sad, and I could see the way he was guarding himself, and in turn an attempt at his feelings. He was a closed off man, a traumatized, conditioned soldier just like the rest of us. It’s hard to express your feelings sometimes, just wanting to tuck them away forever and maybe they will go away.

But I wanted for him to tell me everything he was feeling. The true and raw emotions behind the mask.

“Y/N, I’ve had a feeling we were soulmates for years, and I’ve tortured myself by never telling you. When I found out, I was amazed. I care about you so much, and it hurts me to even try and ignore you. To leave you all alone to cry in your room for a whole week because of something I said. When Gai told me how hurt you were, it felt like I’d just killed someone. The shame and guilt I felt was almost unbearable.”

“Then why did you say it? Why reject me?”

“Everyone I have ever had to love, anyone who has loved me…I don’t know, they just get hurt, they die, and it’s always my fault. I’ve cared about too many people only for them to leave me.” His words were strong but quiet, and I felt the real Kakashi falling into place. “If I loved you any more than I do now, you would get hurt too. I just can’t-I can’t bear to see you taken away from me too.”

“Oh.”

“If we never spoke again, I could at least be comforted in the fact that you are still alive,” he whispered finally.

I felt my heart start to race, and my hands start to sweat. With the courage to look up at him, I noticed that he never took his eyes off the sky. I touched his arm, and he fell into it. Before I could even say anything, he had wrapped me up in a hug, and set his chin upon my head.

“Y/N, I am so sorry.”

“Kakashi, it’s fine. I just want you to be okay.”

He pulled away for a moment, and finally I got to look into his eyes. He had pushed up his headband a while ago, so I could see the two different colored irises. He was truly handsome, the perfect one for me. Without thinking much, I reached up and pulled down his mask. I squeezed my eyes tightly closed and awkwardly pressed my lips to his.

His hands went to the sides of my face, pulling me closer into his lips. I’d never kissed anyone with this much passion before, so much love between the skin. I could feel how warm he was against me, how strong his hands were, and how powerful our connection truly was.

In his arms…That’s where I always belonged.

#naruto #naruto shippuuden #kakashi #kakashi hakate #kakashi x reader #naruto x reader #reader insert #x reader #kakashi hatake x reader #mine #part two #this is one is a fucking train wreck hope someone can enjoy this dumb ass shit #love kakashi but like i said his character is so fucking difficult #and fuck all the cliches make me want to die omg #kakashi soulmate au #soulmate au

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tsarisfanfiction · 3 years

Text

Long Way From Home: Chapter 6

Fandom: Thunderbirds Rating: Teen Genre: Family/Friendship Characters: Scott, Tracy Family

There’s a lot in this chapter - more compare and contrast, yay! - but the bit I want to mention specifically is one of the major society differences between TOS and TAG, which stems entirely from the 50 years between writing - sexism. I’ve noticed that a lot of TOS-based fics tend to shift away from or gloss over that, because that’s just how it was in the 60s when TOS was written and there’s no need to honour it (past the Alan/Tin-Tin spats) in modern fanfic.

Normally, I’d agree, but as already mentioned, I’m playing compare and contrast, and quite frankly the sexism was too tempting to pass up. Now, that does not mean we’ll have City of Fire-esque “crazy woman driver” in the fic because that was writer-sexism, not in-universe, and I’m not about that. Perceptions of women as delicate flowers who are supposed to be seen and not heard by the male [TOS] cast, though? We are definitely playing with that, so consider this a warning. I could go into an entire essay on this, but you’re not here for that, you’re here to see it all through TAG!Scott’s eyes, so let’s let him tell the tale, shall we?

<<<Chapter 5

Scott was on the slippery slope towards a fourth loss – with no wins – when the house trembled slightly. The unmistakable roar of a jet engine in close proximity told him what the cause of it was, and he didn’t need Other-Gordon to confirm it as Thunderbird One. She might not be his Thunderbird One, and her engine might make a different noise, no doubt due to different technology, but Scott had always had an ear for plane engines. Having already heard it once, the cry of this universe’s Thunderbird One was instantly recognisable.

“Do you want to finish up first or call it here?” Other-Gordon asked, either correctly assuming that Scott had every intention of seeing his counterpart now he was back, or simply wanting to attend the debrief himself.

“How long do post-flight checks take here?” he replied, eyeing the board with a brain only half concentrating on the game now and trying to work out if he could do anything other than be defeated before Other-Scott finished said checks and emerged from the hangar.

“Scott’ll be out in five minutes, assuming nothing went wrong on the mission,” Other-Gordon told him, glancing down at his watch. “They weren’t gone long, so it probably all went smoothly.”

“Well I’m not going to get this turned around in five minutes,” he sighed, gesturing at the board, “so we might as well call it.” Other-Gordon laughed.

“You’re right about that,” he agreed. “You’re only two moves away from defeat anyway.” Scott could see that, and knocked his King over to save himself the bother. Other-Gordon laughed again, and swept the pieces up, packing them away before standing. “Let’s see what my brothers had to deal with this time,” he commented, with barely a hint of bitterness to betray the fact he’d have liked to be on it rather than stuck at home waiting. Scott pulled himself up out of the comfortable chair he’d got used to sitting in for the past couple of hours.

“Lead the way.”

They got as far as the door before Other-Gordon stopped, looking up at him with a serious expression he hadn’t seen on his face since before they started playing chess.

“Before we do,” he started; Scott instinctively straightened at the tone. “Knowing you – well, Scott, and assuming it’s something else you two share – you’re no doubt going to be analysing and second-guessing everything the fellas did out on the rescue. Do me a favour and keep it to yourself.”

Scott blinked. “What?”

Other-Gordon didn’t budge, arms crossed. “Your universe and ours have different technology; we’ve all realised that. It’s likely that means you’d make different calls to us, based on what you’d have at your disposal if you were with your own International Rescue. John and Brains, hell maybe Scott and Virgil, too, will be curious at the differences, but save it until you’re asked. The debrief isn’t a place for hypotheticals based on other-universe technology and I doubt you’d appreciate it if roles were reversed and it was our Scott butting in on your debriefs.”

Scott sighed. “You have a point,” he admitted. Keeping his mouth shut when he had an opinion was not something he was particularly well-practiced in, but Other-Gordon was right. He’d be fuming if someone who knew nothing about International Rescue’s capabilities interrupted his own debriefs. The idea that he didn’t know International Rescue’s capabilities rankled, but he remembered Other-John’s rundown of the situation earlier and how many terms had been unfamiliar to him. Hell, they even had different names for something as fundamental as Thunderbird Two’s modules. He sighed again, running a hand down his face, to a raised eyebrow from Other-Gordon.

“Everything alright?” the other man asked, and he shrugged.

“You do realise I’m not used to not being in charge?” he asked rhetorically, prompting a laugh from the ginger.

“I had noticed,” he commented dryly. “Dad’s still going to have a fit if you walk in looking like that, and Scott’s going to want to know what you think you’re doing with his shirt.”

“I’m wearing it,” Scott shrugged.

“Badly,” Other-Gordon retorted, turning away and opening the door, leading the way back towards the lounge – and Not-Dad. Scott tried not to think about the fact he’d soon be in the older man’s presence again.

“It’s more comfortable this way,” he bit back instead, determined to get the last word.

“It looks sloppy.” Other-Gordon clearly didn’t feel like letting him have it.

“Maybe I don’t like looking like a pampered son of a billionaire.” Two could play at that game.

“That’s what you are, so own it.”

“Actually, I’m the billionaire,” Scott pointed out, the one result of Dad’s crash he’d finally found himself comfortable with, if only through necessity and the fact that it was how International Rescue could still operate. “I can look how I want.”

Other-Gordon froze for a fraction of a second before continuing the walk through the villa, a barely-there stumble that told Scott he hadn’t realised that aspect.

“Touché,” he conceded after a moment. “But I don’t think that’ll wash with either of them.” Scott shrugged.

“I stopped caring what other people thought a long time ago,” he pointed out. It was only half a lie – he cared about the opinions of his brothers and closest friends. He didn’t care about the rest of the world’s opinions.

Or another universe’s.

Other-Gordon chuckled again, jogging up the stairs with Scott hot on his heels before heading for the lounge. Scott paused as they crossed the threshold, seeing Tin-Tin already there, but he refused to baulk. Not-Dad was sat behind the desk, looking every inch the man in charge, and he dragged his feet into the room, finding a seat on the edge of the depressed circle and sprawling out on it as though he was at home.

As it happened, his entrance was timed perfectly. Just as Not-Dad caught sight of him, face drawing into a look of disapproval and mouth opening to dish it out in what would no doubt be a tongue lashing, the section of wall housing the two lamps swung around, revealing Other-Scott.

“I’m back, Dad,” he greeted, a split second before he, too, caught sight of Scott and his new attire. “Hey, what are you wearing?”

“Unless you’re in the habit of keeping anyone else’s clothes in your closet, your clothes,” Scott shrugged, eyeing what the other man was wearing. Blue rollneck, checkered blue cardigan and dark brown slacks.

Fashion was definitely different in this universe.

“You look disgraceful,” Not-Dad cut in, but he didn’t look over at him. Their voices were different, so as long as he didn’t look at him, the scolding didn’t hurt so much. “Do up that shirt properly.” Scott ignored him, and Other-Gordon’s sing-song I told you so.

Other-Scott was less ignorable, striding up to him and yanking sharply on the sleeve cuffs to unroll them.

“Don’t wreck my clothes,” he complained. “You’ll stretch the sleeves doing that.” Scott rolled his eyes and tugged his arms back. “Dad, someone needs to get him some new clothes; he can’t keep wearing mine.”

“Or the same underpants because he refuses to wear yours,” Other-Gordon cut in.

“Gordon, Tin-Tin’s present!” Not-Dad snapped, although the young woman was tittering quietly and didn’t seem at all mortified. “We’ll deal with the clothing situation once debrief is over. In the meantime, wear my son’s clothes properly, young man.”

Scott tugged at the sleeves, smoothing them out again at Other-Scott’s request but not doing up any buttons.

“Are you always this insolent?” Not-Dad demanded when he realised Scott wasn’t obeying him. “What does it take to get some respect in my own house?”

Hiding his reluctance, Scott turned his head to meet his eyes. Not-Dad’s eyes were still a hard steely grey; both Other-John and Other-Gordon had mentioned that the two of them clashing was inevitable, and Scott could tell that they were right. He should defer to the other man – it was his home, and he was the one in charge of the people that could get him home – but even considering doing so made his heart rebel violently.

He hadn’t protected his family and his father’s legacy for the past eight years by backing down, and he wasn’t about to start now.

“I respect people who earn it,” he said pointedly. “You don’t get a free pass just because you’re rich and powerful; I’ve rescued too many rich and powerful people from their own stupidity for that.” Francois Lemaire came to mind. The reasoning behind birthday parties in the Mariana Trench and flying into a comet’s coma still boggled him.

Not-Dad looked taken aback, as though the idea of earning respect was foreign to him. Or maybe it was the fact that he admittedly looked just like the man’s eldest son, so maybe hearing that from him was a shock to the system.

“What about International Rescue?” the man asked, and Scott shrugged.

“What about it?”

“Does that not get your respect?”

“I can respect what an organisation does without respecting the man behind it,” he pointed out, coolly. “The fact that you’re International Rescue tells me that you’ll do everything you can to get me home, and I respect that.”

“So you don’t respect us,” Not-Dad said flatly, a hint of anger in his tone, and Scott shrugged.

“I don’t know you,” he reminded the room at large. “You’re an alternate universe version of my family, and I’m still working out what that means. I trust you to help me, but respect? I don’t know you well enough for that.”

“He’s got a point, Dad,” Other-Scott said, perching on the arm of the neighbouring chair. The support was unexpected, but welcome. “Just because he looks like me doesn’t mean he is me.”

“You’re pretty similar,” Other-Gordon piped up, and Scott rolled his eyes.

“That’s not what you said earlier,” he reminded him. Other-Gordon simply shrugged.

“I’m working with more information now.”

“What information?” Not-Dad demanded, and Scott sent the ginger a glare, realising too late that the younger man had never agreed not to share their conversation in the hangar. Other-Gordon was too sharp for his liking. Was his Gordon going to end up that difficult to wrangle in four years, or was it just because despite appearances he wasn’t Other-Gordon’s brother?

“I spent the last three hours playing chess against him,” Other-Gordon informed the room. To his surprise, Other-Scott laughed.

“You couldn’t beat him either? Gordon’s a demon when it comes to chess.”

“I can’t say I expected to win,” Scott admitted. “That’s a fact in both universes.” Other-Gordon preened, and Not-Dad sat back in his desk chair, clearly deciding to let them talk without his intervention.

That act felt a little bit more like Dad, and Scott looked away, the never-healed hole in his heart throbbing painfully. Other-Gordon sent him a sharp look, but said nothing. Other-Scott watched the silent exchange with confusion; Scott didn’t plan on enlightening him, even if he was probably drawing his own conclusions.

Scott looked around as Other-Gordon carried the conversation, talking a mile a minute about chess with – or rather, at – his eldest brother, who slumped off of the arm of the chair he was perching on to sit in it properly. Scott could relate to the post-mission exhaustion, and felt a stab of jealousy that as soon as debrief was over, Other-Scott didn’t have to worry about it anymore. Not-Dad would take it all from there.

No wonder he wasn’t going grey yet.

The photos on the wall had changed. Gone were the five relaxing young men, lounging around in their civvies. Instead, there were photos of the same five young men all wearing IR blue and coloured sashes, posed just like their own portraits at home. He couldn’t believe they still wore those damn hats, then again, that was something he’d scrapped after Dad’s crash. Not-Dad clearly liked the things enough to still keep them, although he wondered if they really wore them all the time.

Their baldrics, although they looked more like sashes than baldrics, matched the colours Other-Scott had rattled off earlier – lilac for Other-John, yellow for Other-Virgil, orange for Other-Gordon and white for Other-Alan. Other-Scott himself had blue, and Scott wondered how much of a say they’d had in their colours. At home, they matched their Thunderbirds, but Thunderbird One here was still the same colour scheme.

“Operation Cover-Up was in effect last time you were in here,” Other-Gordon commented. “If you’re wondering why the pictures are different.” He turned back to look at him and discovered the room was staring at him. Of course they were.

“Operation Cover-Up?” he asked, frowning. “What’s that?”

Other-Scott narrowed his eyes, but it was Not-Dad that replied, frowning back at him in return.

“Surely you have one of your own?” he inquired. “The identity of International Rescue must be kept secret, after all.”

Scott had almost forgotten about that; the first one of Dad’s rules to fly out of the window, not that he’d been able to do anything about it.

“I wish,” he muttered. While having their identities was useful at times, being dogged and recognised at a glance whenever they were out in public – and unable to let visitors onto the island without extensive background checks because otherwise they’d go snooping – was beyond tiring. Even their location wasn’t as hidden as he’d like, especially not now the GDF knew it – Colonel Casey promised it was a high level clearance secret, but that didn’t change the fact there were people in the GDF that knew.

“Are you saying it’s not a secret in your universe?” Not-Dad demanded, and Scott shrugged.

“The world’s not stupid.” He slumped back in his chair, hyper aware that everyone in the room was watching him with varying levels of interest and disbelief. “Billionaire ex-Astronaut Jeff Tracy goes missing the exact same time the Commander of IR does. Two and two makes four. Not even John and Lady P could cover that up.” Especially not with the Hood leaking the information left, right and centre before going underground, as though killing his Dad wasn’t enough damage. “Best we’ve got is that most of the world don’t know where we live.”

“How are you still operating?” Other-Scott asked, beating his father to it by barely a second, judging by Not-Dad’s opened mouth. “Aren’t people trying to steal the technology?”

Scott groaned. “All the damn time. Island’s on permanent lockdown – no-one’s allowed on or off without our security’s approval. The GDF-” Other-John hadn’t known what that was “-the world military suffers us because we’re better at saving people than them and they know it. Our godmother being a Colonel helps a lot.” He ran a hand over his face again, feeling drained just thinking about the mess he had to deal with daily to keep IR running.

How would they manage without him? Would the GDF force them to shut down, or would John or Virgil step up? How far did Colonel Casey’s reach go; could she still keep them out of trouble with the GDF?

“Scott?” It was Other-Gordon that spoke, but when he pulled his hand away from his face it was Not-Dad he looked at.

“It’s possible to operate when the world knows who you are, but it’s a damn headache.”

“Language!” the man barked. “There are women present.” Scott rolled his eyes, under no illusions that Tin-Tin and Mrs Tracy hadn’t heard worse.

“Gee, so that’s why you’re going grey,” Other-Gordon chipped in, and Scott glowered at him half-heartedly. “And here I was thinking I was going to need to see if Scott was hiding some dye somewhere.”

“Gordon,” Other-Scott growled. The ginger put his hands up.

“Just saying; it seemed suspicious that he’s going grey and you’re not.”

“Why would I be going grey already?” Other-Scott demanded. “I’m thirty.”

“And he’s twenty-seven, so that argument doesn’t hold any water, old chap,” Other-Gordon retorted.

“Wait, what?” All eyes fell on Scott again, and he sent another withering glance Other-Gordon’s way. The ginger wasn’t saying anything he’d explicitly wanted not said, but he was definitely skirting around dangerously close to the edge. “It’s not twenty-sixty-five where you’re from?” Other-Scott continued, and Scott froze.

“Twenty-what?” he asked. That… didn’t make sense. That didn’t make sense at all. He’d be thirty-two in 2065, not thirty. Then again, the age gaps between Virgil, Gordon and Alan were also different between the two universes, so maybe he shouldn’t be surprised.

“I take it that’s a no?” Other-Scott replied, and he shrugged.

“Twenty-sixty.”

“That’s weird.”

“Tell me about it,” Scott groaned. “I need to tell your Brains this stuff but apparently I’m not allowed to disturb him.”

“What ‘stuff’?” Tin-Tin asked, inserting herself in the conversation. “Have you worked anything out?”

“Scott and I were playing spot the difference earlier,” Other-Gordon chipped in. “Seems there’s a few more differences than we thought.”

“Like different dates of birth,” Other-Scott noted. “I was twenty-five in twenty-sixty, not twenty-seven. Is your birthday April fourth?”

Scott nodded, relieved that at least one thing was the same.

“Different age gaps, too,” Other-Gordon pointed out.

“Your brothers are closer in age?” Not-Dad asked. “It can’t be the opposite, or you’d be too young to operate.” Scott winced; the topic was getting too close to areas he didn’t want it, and unlike Other-Gordon, Not-Dad and probably Other-Scott wouldn’t let the matter of Alan’s age drop. “They’re not?” Not-Dad sounded startled, and he realised the wince had given him away. “But-”

He stood up suddenly.

“Let me know when you’re debriefing,” he said, and walked out. Dammit all; he’d said he wouldn’t run away, and he knew he couldn’t keep Alan’s age from Not-Dad and Other-Scott forever, but he wasn’t ready to see the disapproval on Not-Dad’s face. Not when it was so like Dad’s.

“Scott!” It was a woman’s voice – Tin-Tin’s, to be precise, and he reluctantly turned to see the younger woman following him hurriedly. With the topic of ages on his mind, he realised she was probably a similar age to Kayo, not older like the Tracy family seemed to be. Something else that made no sense.

“What is it?” he asked her as she came to a stop in front of her. No-one else emerged from the lounge; whether they were talking about him, or had decided to entrust him to Tin-Tin, he didn’t know.

“I want to hear about these differences,” she said firmly. “Brains is busy with the data he already has, but I’m not.” She put a hand on his arm and directed him towards the stairs.

“What do you mean?” he asked, following her with the reminder that she was this universe’s Kayo stuck in his mind. Just because she didn’t look as dangerous, didn’t mean she wasn’t.

“You recognised my father’s name, but not mine,” she observed. “Let’s start at the beginning; good day, it’s very nice to meet you. My name is Tin-Tin Kyrano and my primary role on the island is as Brains’ assistant.”

That was different, but the words ‘Brains’ assistant’ stuck out like a lifeline. He smiled at her and stuck out his hand. “Good day, and it’s very nice to meet you. The name’s Scott Tracy and in my universe I’m the commander of International Rescue.” She looked at his hand for a moment before grasping it. Her grip was light but firm and he knew his initial impressions had been correct – she was not a woman to be crossed.

If she could help get him home, he had no intentions of crossing her.

“Well, now that we’re introduced,” she smiled, guiding him back towards the infirmary but stopping in front of a different door, pushing it open to reveal a homely sitting area, “perhaps we should talk about those differences Brains needs to know about. Come in; we still have fifteen minutes before Thunderbird Two gets back, and the boys won’t be ready for debrief for another fifteen after that.”

It was only after he entered that he saw the king-sized bed, surrounded with drapes, in an alcove of the room and realised it must be her bedroom.

“Take a seat,” she invited, gesturing to a plush loveseat. “Would you like something to drink?”

“If you have coffee that would be amazing,” he admitted, and she laughed.

“I think the American men on this island would all stop functioning if we didn’t have coffee,” she smiled, heading for a coffee press in the corner of the room. Scott wondered why that was there when the kitchen was just down the hall. “How do you take it?”

“However I can get it,” Scott admitted. “But ideally a splash of milk and a sugar.”

“Just like our Scott,” she commented. “How you men live off so much caffeine, I will never understand. Your blood must be more coffee than blood at this rate.”

Scott smiled dryly. “Something like that.”

“I must confess I’m curious – what am I like in your universe?” she asked as she set the water to boil. “You don’t look at me like you do the boys.”

“Kayo – Tanusha, but we call her Kayo after she put me down in a sparring session – is… different to you,” Scott admitted. “She’s a tomboy, our head of security after Kyrano… left. Grew up with us as a sister, jumps into a fight first chance she gets. I have to hold her back more than all of my brothers combined.”

Kayo would be going ballistic that he vanished right under her nose, even though she hadn’t been on the island at the time. He hoped she wouldn’t follow in Kyrano’s footsteps and vanish after ‘failing’ him. His brothers still needed her, whatever else happened.

Tin-Tin made a noise of surprise. “I assumed she must have been different, but that is very different,” she observed. The kettle whistled, steam pouring out of it, and she decanted the contents into the coffee press. “She gets into fights? Whatever do people think of that?”

“Kayo doesn’t care,” Scott shrugged. “She usually wins them, anyway.”

“That’s not particularly ladylike,” Tin-Tin observed, although she didn’t sound particularly scandalised about it. “Is that common in your universe? You mentioned your godmother’s a Colonel in the military..?”

Scott thought to how Not-Dad had been so strict on language in front of her, and frowned.

“Are women generally treated like they’re made of glass here, or is that just him?” he asked. “Grandma, Kayo and Lady P would have all had something to say if someone specifically cleaned up their language in front of them because they’re female.”

“As a general rule they think we’re delicate flowers, yes,” Tin-Tin confirmed, carrying a tray with two cups on it over to the table. One was clearly his coffee, while the other looked like another herbal tea. “Your attitude is quite refreshing, although when Mr Tracy isn’t around the boys lose the gentlemanly airs a little.”

“When you live with a sister who can kick your ass seven ways to Sunday and a Grandma with a sharp tongue you learn women aren’t made of glass pretty damn quick,” Scott shrugged.

“I suppose you would,” she agreed, pulling out a notebook and pencil. “That seems like quite the incentive, but while you’re here, at least try to pretend you think we’re made of glass.” She winked. “It somewhat ruins the deception if a man sees through it.”

That was a very Lady Penelope response, and Scott made a mental note of that.

“I’ll see what I can do,” he agreed, before looking pointedly at the notebook. “You had questions?”

“Those differences Gordon alluded to,” she confirmed. “I’ll write them down and give them to Brains to look at once he’s finished with the information he currently has.” Scott nodded his head and began to talk about the differences he and Other-Gordon had realised earlier.

The different age gaps – Tin-Tin let out a small gasp when she found out Alan was only fifteen, but didn’t comment, much to his relief – and the different years of birth had already been somewhat covered in the lounge, but he also mentioned the differences in appearance, describing them as best he could and failing utterly at anything past “John’s hair is ginger, Virgil’s is black, Gordon’s is blond, and they’re all kinda younger-looking”. His observation of different fashions, their earlier discussion on perception of women, and even an attempt into the technological differences also made their way into Tin-Tin’s rapidly filling notebook. At some point they heard the sound of a rumbling engine, deeper than Thunderbird One’s, and he recognised it as this universe’s Thunderbird Two. Tin-Tin barely reacted, only mentioning off-handedly that they had about fifteen minutes left before continuing their conversation.

She steered clear of asking any questions about what had happened to his Dad, which he appreciated. That wound had been rubbed raw more than enough for one day, what with his initial outburst, Other-John’s quiet probing and Other-Gordon’s outright interrogation. She did, however, manage to steer the conversation towards his grandmother, and almost fell out of her chair when she discovered Sally Tracy couldn’t cook.

“However do you boys keep yourselves fed?” she demanded. “If it’s not Mrs Tracy, my father, or Kayo?”

Scott shrugged. “Take-out or snatching time to cook between missions,” he admitted. “One good thing about the world knowing we’re IR is that if I use Thunderbird One, take-out’s still hot by the time I get it back.” She laughed at that for a moment before turning serious again.

“But you boys must have a balanced diet,” she worried. “There’s no way you can keep up with the physical demands of International Rescue without one.”

“We manage,” he assured her. “When John’s home we lock him in the kitchen; he’s by far the best cook out of the five of us.” That elicited another laugh, although she looked halfway cross with herself for it. “We can all cook at least enough to survive.” She didn’t look entirely convinced, but with an entire universe between them, there wasn’t much she could do about it and the topic reluctantly got dropped.

“This is a lot of differences,” she said instead, looking down at her pages and pages of small, scrawling handwriting. Scott could barely read it, but it had also been a long time since he’d had to read anything handwritten that wasn’t his own writing – and even that was unusual. Why handwrite when you had computers to do that for you? “Most of them are small enough to work around while you’re here, but the differing years suggest your universe is five years younger than ours, and I’m not sure if there’s any significance about the different years of birth. That’s something Brains or John might understand better.”

He nodded his understanding, his chest feeling lighter now he felt like they were getting somewhere. Baby steps to be sure, and Other-John’s gentle reminder that it could take years still rang in his ears, but progress was progress.

“Now, it’s about time for the debrief to start,” she said, checking her own watch. Scott did the same, but the analogue dial taunted him, reminding him that he needed to learn to read it sooner rather than later – although that meant finding someone to teach him. “Alan and Virgil should be all cleaned up by now.”

Scott drained the remains of his coffee and stood up, empty cup in hand.

“Oh, leave the cup on the table,” Tin-Tin told him. “I’ll clean it up later.”

“If you’re sure,” he said dubiously – Grandma would have his hide for leaving dirty crockery anywhere that wasn’t the kitchen, and even then it was expected to be cleaned immediately. Rescues were the only permissible excuse to do otherwise.

“Perfectly,” she assured him, hand once again on his arm. “Come on, let’s go hear about what the boys did today.” With one last glance at the cup, and noticing that Tin-Tin had picked up her notebook, he let the young woman nudge him out of the room and headed for the stairs up to the lounge again.

Chapter 7>>>

#thunderbirds are go #thunderbirds are go fanfiction #thunderbirds #thunderbirds fanfiction #tsari writes fanfiction #scott tracy #long way from home #gordon tracy #jeff tracy #tin-tin kyrano

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