#i just came up with that how genius am i cmon
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ah, yes i love gayer things
#gayer things#stranger things#st4#mike wheeler#will byers#byler#robin buckley#nancy wheeler#ronance#steve harrington#eddie munson#steddie#enzo stranger things#dmitri antonov#jim hopper#jimitri#i just came up with that how genius am i cmon#mlm ship#wlw ship
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twenty two days before we go our separate ways (twenty two days of not falling for you) | yoon jeonghan
content: fluff; angst (because ofc); fake dating; friends to lovers; some joshua x reader; adults who are in their 30s and have jobs;
word count: 20.3k
summary: there’s a special bond between you and jeonghan, and no one was surprised when you announced you were together. to you, it’s a surprise no one realised it wasn’t real.
warnings: language; allusions to sex and suggestive language; (brief) descriptions of vomiting; jealousy and possessiveness;
after a five month hiatus i have returned with a HOLY WHY IS THIS SO LONG fic hope you enjoy :)
also i’ve decided i want to label my fics the same way fob write song titles
D-1
“You have got to be kidding me.”
His eyes widened, then slowly closed in embarrassment. “Look, you’re the only person I could ask…”
“There is no way I’m going to fake date you, Jeonghan!”
In all the years that you had spent knowing Jeonghan, you had never gotten fully used to the shenanigans and plots, half of which you were a pawn in, half were levied against you. Right now, it was easy to say you preferred the latter. Especially given that unlike your mutual friend Soonyoung, he never went too far. Jeonghan had a perfect skill for being outlandish but never unacceptable. Although, this time felt too far. This time felt ridiculous.
“It’s only for three weeks!”
“Twenty two days! Three weeks! Thats three separate, wait no FOUR separate Saturdays I’ll have to spend cozied up to you, pretending to- ugh.”
“Don’t gag.”
“Huoh.”
Gagging was excessive, in all fairness. Jeonghan was a gorgeous man, and the string of broken hearts he carried on his shoulder was evidence enough, which made you so much more suspicious of his words. Why were you the only person available?
“I just need to get this girl off my back at Wonwoo’s wedding, and it has to be believable, because you know that Jun and Seungcheol cannot keep a secret, so if they know then Jiwon will know, and if Jiwon knows then I’m trapped. Cmon, please.”
“Three weeks is so long.” You whined, throwing yourself down on the couch. You had always been one for the dramatics. Perhaps thats what drew you to Jeonghan, why you were good friends.
FRIENDS. Specifically.
“Look it’s not like you wouldn’t get anything out of it!” Jeonghan begged, kneeling in front of you in a desperate attempt to have you look his way. “It would make Joshua so jealous.”
“He would only be jealous if he actually had feelings for me, Han, and we both know he doesn’t.”
“That’s not true, I am so completely sure he has feelings for you, he just doesn’t know it yet.” Jeonghan’s hand was on your shoulder, rubbing it soothingly, as you were reminded of how helpless and pathetic you felt when it came to Joshua. The gorgeous American who never seemed to spare a glance in your direction. Sure, you were all friends, and he obviously cared about you, but only as a friend. It was clear the way he looked at other people, it was a way he had never looked at you. It didn’t take a genius to figure it out, and for the most part you would like to say you were pretty good at spotting when people had feelings for you.
When you were eleven and there was pesky Seokmin who kept throwing pencils at you when he thought you weren’t looking, it was obvious he had feelings for you, which you quickly shut down because who would want to go out with someone who had to resort to petty violence to get your attention? And Mingyu, who would avoid you like the plague all of year 12 until he could muster up the courage to tell you about his feelings for you, which you had obviously seen coming. You were always one step ahead - you didn’t like being caught off guard. Jeonghan was the only person you felt like you could trust to trick you, if that made sense at all. Even when he was being a menace, you still felt somewhat safe. And that was really working against you at the moment.
“You know,” He spoke with a glint in his eye that you couldn’t have missed, even if you wanted to. Oh, how desperately you wanted to. After being friends for so long, you could read Jeonghan too well. “He’s just broken up with Heejin. I bet we could try to make him jealous? Make him realise his feelings for you?”
You sniffled slightly, burying a laugh at Jeonghan’s cunning expression. “You’re just saying that so I’ll agree to go out with you.”
“Maybe. Is it working?”
You pondered for a moment. When Jihoon got married just a few months prior, you didn’t have anyone to go with, and you felt devastated watching the gorgeous boy hanging off Joshua’s shoulder. Jeonghan was quick to offer to ditch his date for you, but it didn’t make the ache in your chest dull any faster. You didn’t want to relive that, and you definitely didn’t want to seem lonely and desperate - you didn’t miss the concerned glance from Joshua last time. It would be nice to seem more desired, even if it was fake. It’s all about image, right?
“You know if we do this you won’t be able to flirt with anyone at the party.” You reminded him. “We’ll have to keep up the ruse that you’re actually interested in me.”
“Is it too late to take it back?”
“Yah, Jeonghan!”
“Kidding! Who wouldn’t be into you? Well…” He trailed off teasingly, and it’s moments like this where your glare settles in across from him that he feels so lucky to be secure in your friendship. “I wouldn’t dream of ditching you.”
“I can’t believe I’m doing this.” You whispered to your ceiling, and you didn’t miss the grin that spread across Jeonghan’s face. Lucky bastard. “Fine, starting from tomorrow we will be fake dating.”
“Thank you, thank you, thank you Y/N!” He grabbed your hands, pulling you up from the sofa to celebrate with him. “I will drive you everywhere, don’t worry, and whenever you don’t feel like cooking I’ll cook for you, and-“
“Woah, slow down, I’ll pass on the food. I’ve seen you in a kitchen.” You hushed your friend, letting him settle. “Besides, if we’re going to do this, we need rules. Everything needs to be out in the open.”
You never liked being caught off guard, and you were going to make sure you weren’t.
You settled back down onto the couch, and Jeonghan disappeared to grab something from out of your fridge before settling against you, cuddling to your side. “So what’s the backstory? People are definitely going to ask how we got together, we should probably get a story established.”
“Hmm, what about, you watched me kill it at karaoke, and you were so overcome with adoration and horniness that you confessed your undying love for me, and-“
“Absolutely not. I refuse to say any of that.”
“That’s okay, I’ll tell them.”
“No way!” You shoved him playfully, groaning as he elbowed you in retaliation. “Low blow, Han. Let’s try to think of something more realistic. What about you went on a date and it made me jealous, so I confessed?”
“Yeah, except we’ve both dated other people and it’s never caused jealousy before, I don’t think anyone would fall for it.” He told you, and you cursed under your breath because he was right. “What about we got tipsy and made out? And then realised we liked each other?”
“That works, I guess. It’s a little crass but it’ll do.” You nodded at Jeonghan, and grabbed a piece of paper from your coffee table. “Now rules: obviously we can’t tell anyone.”
“No shit.”
“Don’t be rude, we have to write the obvious too.” You rolled your eyes at Jeonghan, jotting down the words escaping your mind onto paper. No one can know this is fake.
“What about once it’s all over? You know, when you’re off being married to Joshua, and I’ve got myself a new sexy partner?” Jeonghan questioned, wiggling his eyebrows and nudging you.
“Ew? Why did I agree to this?”
“Because deep down you love me and my shenanigans.” Jeonghan popped a cherry in his mouth, chewing on it slightly, staining his lips red. You looked in disgust as a sliver of crimson drool slipped down the corner of his mouth.
“Deep, deep, deep, deep, deep down.”
“Didn’t deny it.” He winked. “So can we tell people eventually? Or are we taking this to the grave?”
“Okay, how about this? No one can know this is fake until we’re married to other people. There, that gives us plenty of time.” Jeonghan nodded thoughtfully, and you quickly jotted down the addition.
“Oh, pass me the pen, I have a good one.”
You let the pen drop out of your hands, pushing it to Jeonghan, who started scribbling something down. You looked over his shoulder, reading out the words…
“…We can’t be cliche and fall in love with each other- are you taking this seriously at all Han?”
He laughed, and you swear he would have spit cherries all over you. You cursed slightly, feeling suddenly very tempted to push him off the bed. “Dickhead.”
“A future junior partner at Kim-Byun Legal Services shouldn’t be using that kind of language, Y/N.” Jeonghan teased, smirking at your frustrated expression.
“Shut it Yoon. And take this seriously! If we fuck up everyone will find out, including Jiwon.”
He shuddered at the mention of her name. “God and she won’t leave me alone. Fine, what other rules do we need?”
“Hmm, we need to post each other on social media. Instagram is a must.” You told him, and to your surprise he hummed in agreement - you really were expecting more of a pushback. Jeonghan never liked tainting his single and available persona, and he was yet to ever post a S/O photo anywhere. “You don’t sound upset?”
“You’re right. It won’t be believable if there’s nothing online, at least on your social media. Besides, the more we commit, the more jealous Joshua will get, and the more Jiwon will realise she needs to back off.”
You nodded, writing it down. “That means we’ll probably have to pose for photos, go on dates and such.”
“Eh, we already hang out loads, we’ll just have to add cheesy captions. Doesn’t sound difficult at all.”
Jeonghan was right. You had spent way too many years being friends with him to ever feel uncomfortable around him, and with that boundaries were out of the window. Half of your outings looked like dates, and this wasn’t even the first time the two of you had used that ambiguity to convince others you or he wasn’t available. It was the first time you were actively deceiving people though. Perhaps that was why you felt on edge. All the other times, you had just let people come to their own conclusions, this time you would be lying. Was that why your heart was beating more? Was that what was causing the sudden discomfort as you laid in Jeonghan’s arms?
“Okay, that’s three rules, do we need anything else? Is there anything we’re forgetting?”
He thought about it for a moment, then brushed it off, letting the thought roll away from his shoulders, while yours stayed tensed and rigid. “We can probably add as we go along. Leave it on your fridge, oh but hide it when you get guests.”
“Well duh.” You rolled your eyes at him, grabbing a cherry out of his bowl. You chewed it softly, and groaned in surprise at the way it burst open. “God these are way too ripe, why are you eating them?”
“They still taste good, and they make me look like a vampire.” He grinned at you, showing off his stained canines (and chin, but you decided not to focus on that). “Just spray me with body glitter and I’ll have hoards of fangirls.”
“You already have hoards of fangirls, and fanboys.” You reminded him, rubbing at the corner of your mouth where cherry juice exploded down.
Jeonghan watched as you missed the trail of juice that had begun to dry on your skin. He smiled, and before you knew it he had licked his thumb, wiping away the red line from your mouth. Your breath hitched as you watched his eyes, trained on you, the part of your cheek right next to your lips, so much so that it felt like that’s all he was looking at. He smiled, drawing his finger back, with a satisfied look on his face.
“There,” He whispered, barely audible had you not been pressed up against him. “You can get a taste of the Yoon Jeonghan Boyfriend Treatment early.”
“Gross, you got your saliva all over me.” You whined, pushing him away. “I gotta wash my face now.” You ignored his chuckles as you made a beeline for the bathroom, eager to get him off of you, in every sense.
“You better get used to my saliva babe!” He laughed as you walked away from him. Cute.
It’s a strange feeling to ponder on your time with someone, but that’s what you watched yourself do in the hour before you were, technically, officially going out with him. The hour until midnight struck, you were in bed, teeth brushed, pajamas on, and only Jeonghan on your mind.
You’ve spent more of your life with him in it than without him. He was in the year above you at school, but you and him always gravitated to the same napping spot under the bleachers, and from there a comfort was born. Even before that, he was always around, his friends were the older brothers of your friends, and you had known each other by association, which made it easier to grow into an easy friendship come middle school. Half of the times you had suspected someone’s growing crush on you, it was Jeonghan whispering rumours into your ear. He had always looked out for you, and as the two of you aged and grew closer, you looked out for him too, until you two felt most comfortable together, and not with anyone else.
It had never stopped the two of you from dating, of course. He was hot, you were hot, and other people realised it. In your case though, it had been a force driving boyfriends away. They could never quite get used to how close you and Jeonghan were, and you had been accused of cheating or leading them on more times than you could count. Meanwhile, Jeonghan’s flings always came rushing to you on advice and inside intel, seemingly loving your presence - until they realised that he would never put them above you, and suddenly you were the bitter best friend who could never let him date in peace.
And you had friends, mutual friends who in turn formed a large group that you welcomed and blossomed with. But no one could ever come in between you and Jeonghan. The two of you existed in a little bubble, never to be popped or disturbed. You could imagine the delight some of your friends would express once you told them you two were an item, they were always the teasing that you two were secretly dating and hiding it from the world.
But you were an adult now, the two of you had been out of high school and university for several years now, and still you weren’t dating, despite being so close, it drove your friends mad. You knew that you didn’t need to explain it, as long as you and Jeonghan were on the same page. Boyfriends would come and go, but Jeonghan was always your priority. It had always been platonic, but you knew that if nothing else lasted, your friendship with Jeonghan would. He knew it too.
You turned, groaning into your pillow. How were you going to go to this wedding? Part of the beauty of your relationship with Jeonghan was that it was simple. It had never once felt complicated to you, just because other people didn’t understand it doesn’t mean you didn’t. But not dating for over a decade and suddenly starting to go out? Only to break it off three weeks later? That felt too complicated to explain, or even comprehend. Would people even believe it?
You were so tempted to text Jeonghan to call it off, to find another stunning specimen to hang off his arm and scare away Jiwon. She was all bark, no bite - no matter what hurtful words she had spat at Jeonghan when he tried calling their thing off, she wouldn’t go up and make light of those threats. Ultimately, she was harmless, but terrible at taking hints. Hence why he’s created this dumb plan. It wasn’t too late to back out was it? You grabbed your phone, and it dinged in your hand.
12:01. Shit.
And there it was, a text from your loving boyfriend.
Hannie: Happy first day of dating, baby ;)
No backing out now.
Day 1 - Saturday 3rd November
After the reminder Jeonghan had sent of your month long promise, you had rolled around your bed until you finally nodded off, and then subsequently overslept, which was only made clear as a banging on your door began to wake you.
Jeonghan was here.
The knock (which was always made with the full force of his fists - you swore that one day he was going to break your door down) was nothing other than courtesy. Jeonghan had his own set of keys to your apartment, and he wasn’t shy about using them. You could already hear him fumbling with the keys, and the muttered curses under his breath. You couldn’t wait to make partner and get out of this place and to somewhere with more soundproofing, you were certainly sick of hearing the muffled grunts and moans of your neighbours who had nothing better to do than spend the nights in each other(’s arms). But it did allow you those few seconds of awareness before Jeonghan barged into your home.
The door finally swung open, and there he was in his full glory - your new boyfriend. Even thinking the word in association with Jeonghan gave you a shudder. There was something about thinking of Jeonghan that way that just felt so… alien. It wasn’t like you had never had those wandering thoughts, but that was all they were: visitors who didn’t stay long. Now, the label was here for three weeks, and you were way too tired to comprehend just how long that really was.
“Why aren’t you up? Don’t you remember we’re helping Minghao set up the venue today? We’ve also got to make an all so important announcement, in case you forgot.”
You groaned, smoothing down your bedhead as best you could to be semi presentable. “I know, I just overslept. Struggled to fall asleep last night.”
He looked over at you as you stumbled out of bed, grabbing the coat hanger that had your outfit off your dresser as you walked slowly to the bathroom. “Just give me 20 minutes to get ready.”
“Are you feeling okay Y/N?” He asked carefully, walking closer to you. “It’s not too late to call it off, I don’t want to stress you out, especially with everything going on with work.”
It was certainly a tempting offer, and one you had been considering just the previous night. But looking back at Jeonghan’s concerned expression, you were reminded of why you even agreed in the first place. Yes, you wanted to make Joshua jealous, and that was your main goal, but Jeonghan had never let you down, and you weren’t going to let him down either.
“Don’t worry. Wonwoo’s wedding is on the 24th. Four Saturdays, I can definitely last that long.” You told him, blinking away the puffiness in your eyes. He didn’t seem too convinced, but you knew Jeonghan was too far in it to say anything else. “Twenty minutes, then we’ll go.”
Day 1 (cont.)
You weren’t too sure when it happened, but somewhere along the car ride, Jeonghan’s spare hand had nestled into yours. It felt somewhat romantic. You were no stranger to holding his hand, but it meant something different this time. Of course, something deceptive, but still different.
As the car pulled to the stop, you squeezed his hand comfortingly.
“Ready?”
You and Jeonghan smiled at each other, and to anyone who could see past the tinted windows, you were putting on your best show even before you walked out of the car. Of course, knowing Seungcheol, he was probably waiting outside the venue, and this sort of attention to detail that Jeonghan had mastered was crucial considering your friends.
“Ready.”
Your hands detached as the two of you got out of the car, only to join once more as Jeonghan rushed to your side, draping his arm across your shoulder and kissing your hand. You were almost shocked by his actions, the ones that felt so loving, until you heard the all too familiar screech of his would be best friend (had that title not been taken by you, long ago).
“Yoon Jeonghan! Did you and Y/N finally confess your love to each other?!” Seungcheol yelled across the parking lot, jogging up to you.
“Showtime.” Jeonghan whispered in your ear, nuzzling his nose against your skin. It was so sickeningly puppy love, you had to hold yourself back and be reminded that this is your life for the next month. “Seungcheol!”
He walked up and hugged his friend, and you followed suit, before settling back at Jeonghan’s side. Seungcheol couldn’t hide his grin, going on and on. “I knew it! For years, you guys said there was nothing there, but I knew it would happen eventually! I told you so, didn’t I Jeonghan? And all you ever said, Y/N and I are just friends, they would never see me that way, but HAH! I was right!”
Seungcheol kept rambling, barely even speaking to you, truthfully it felt more like he was yelling at characters on a screen rather than friends he had known for all his life (at least in Jeonghan’s case - you only got to know Seungcheol as you got closer to Jeonghan).
“Everyone’s going to be so shocked, even more so than when Wonwoo finally proposed.”
You scoffed. “No one was surprised when Wonwoo proposed, we were all surprised he hadn’t proposed sooner.”
“Same sentiment they’ll have with us, I guess.” Jeonghan shrugged, tightening his grip around you. You held your bated breath as you thought about just how close you were to Jeonghan, that if you reached out just a little you could tuck that stray hair that was in front of his face away, you always thought he looked so much nicer when his face wasn’t covered-
“…dating?” Seungcheol’s sentence finally trailed off, and you realised he was waiting for your answer. Shit, you hadn’t paid any attention, and it was clearly evident by your lost expression. “God you two are still in the honeymoon phase, pay attention to me as well, not just your boyfriend.”
Your nose almost curled so instinctively at that word. Boyfriend. It still felt so wrong to use for Jeonghan, and by the way he tensed only ever so slightly beside you, you knew he felt the same. As if you were claiming him, but you knew Jeonghan wouldn’t want that, that’s why he froze. Wasn’t it?
“Come on, let’s go inside, you can tell everyone you’re finally dating!”
You and Jeonghan followed Seungcheol, who chattered away to Jeonghan as you walked in silence. You were always the more quiet of the pair. Not exactly introverted or shy, but picky with your words. You hated the idea of saying something you didn’t mean. Jeonghan was careful too, but it was like he had everything ready before anything else was ever said. Jeonghan was always careful, always clever.
He had never been the boyfriend type. Everyone knew it. He had flings, some that even lasted months, but never relationships. He went on dates, but only those that ended up in a hookup. The word boyfriend had never been used to describe him, only used as a wish others had hoped he would fulfill. Your friends would always tease, of course, that he could never be a boyfriend to anyone else because he was too busy being a boyfriend for you, but the two of you knew it wasn’t that. No, Jeonghan could never be a boyfriend to anyone because he didn’t want the expectations that came with it. Jeonghan did as he wanted, on his own terms. But a boyfriend has a role to play, and Jeonghan would die before he gave into that. It was always frustrating for him that his friends never seemed to understand that, but now it played right into his plan. And you understood, so did anyone else need to?
As Seungcheol ushered you in, you were surprised to see just how many of your friends were already gathered, moving chairs and dusting the floors, with Minghao set in the centre, directing everyone. Wonwoo and his fiancee were doing their best to cut costs, with Minghao acting as wedding planner, and all their friends chipping in to help out where they could, which of course is how you all ended up setting up a wedding venue inside a dusty old warehouse. Minghao assured them it would look beautiful, if and only if everyone listened carefully to every instruction he gave, without deviation. To say you and Jeonghan were scared of pissing him off was definitely an understatement.
Eyes snapped to you and Jeonghan at the sound of the door closing, and even more gathered in your direction as Seungcheol started yelling about an announcement.
“Y/N and Jeonghan have something to say!” He yelled across the crowds (well, 30 or so friends), apologising silently to Minghao as he glared at the older boy.
You froze, hiding your head in Jeonghan’s arm as the pressure of being watched suddenly settled into you. He smiled at you, and wagged your hand held in his at everyone. “Y/N and I are dating!”
Everyone erupted into gasps and shouts, but were all effectively shut up by Minghao’s yell. “Get this place clean first, then gossip!”
Jun walked up to you, handing you a mop and reading off instructions Minghao had given him on everything that needed to be done today. “But seriously, I am so happy for you guys. Good luck fielding everyone off though, everyone’s gonna have so many questions.”
You walked over with Jun to where Chan, Yeeun, Sakura, and Seungkwan were all mopping the floors. The youngest pushed you gently, grinning at you.
“I can’t believe you and Jeonghan are finally dating!” Chan grinned. “Took you guys long enough.”
“I guess it’s been a long time coming.” You hummed, as you started cleaning the floors with them. You looked back to where Jeonghan was, now surrounded by friends who were congratulating him. It filled you with a strange pride to know you were a prize to be congratulated for winning. Of course, they don’t know it’s not real. But the illusion still felt victorious.
“Is everyone here? It’s been ages since we all met up.”
“Yeah! Oh, everyone but Joshua, he had to cancel last minute.” You felt your shoulders threaten to drop at the news Soonyoung shared. “Of course, the day we’re cleaning away the dust and mould, he can’t make it.”
Sakura hit his shoulder softly. “He would come if he could. There was an emergency at his firm.”
There was no skylight, but you were sure that if there was one, the clouds would have covered the sunlight.
You were only a year younger than Joshua, only a year younger than Jeonghan, but he had already been a junior partner at his firm for three years now, while you were spending every spare hour at your office in a desperate attempt to prove to the asses behind the desks in the floor above yours how much you deserved to be partner.
You weren’t surprised when Joshua was made partner. He was incredible, a talented lawyer who saw shortcuts and loopholes no one else realised were there. He was so dedicated, and smart, and dreamy, although you were sure that last part wasn’t one of the qualifying traits for partnership.
Your whole life, you were a step behind him. Most of that was just the fact that he was a year ahead of you: he graduated first, he took his bar exam first, he joined a firm first. Meanwhile you were the sad kid following him from place to place.
It was no secret Joshua cared for you like a younger sibling. Of course, he wasn’t always around, he couldn’t be. He had too much to do, too many places to be. But he cared about you, and always made sure you knew. What was a secret were the feelings you had for him, locked in a cage next to your heart, with a bluebird that sang love songs to fuel your adoration for him. Only Jeonghan knew, and he had been sworn to secrecy. (It didn’t matter that he had been - he could keep a secret easily, and he would have never given away one of yours.)
When you were seventeen, and Joshua left you to go to university, that was the first moment you realised just how much you cared for him. You ended up in the same university, and then later the same law school, and now the same city. The years you shared in law school, cuddled up in sofas trying to decipher notes from lectures, and questioning the sanity of professors formed a budding love, and one that you only realised when he left you once more. You followed him and Jeonghan place to place, in a desperate attempt to have him realise just how you felt, and he never did. You were his Y/N, always around, always there for him, but never an option. And while he dated, you did too, but no one seemed to replace him. All your exes blamed Jeonghan for your failed relationships, when they should have blamed Joshua.
And now here you were once again, back home from cleaning up Wonwoo’s rented warehouse, once again wishing he had noticed you, wishing that he would finally see you in a different light.
Day 2 - Sunday 4th November
“You have to pose more like you’re my boyfriend.”
“What does that even mean?”
“I don’t know! But you’re not very good at this.”
Jeonghan groaned, shoving your phone away from his face like a disgraced celebrity. The two of you had met out for coffee and, in your case, highlighting case notes and writing out forms, while Jeonghan edited scripts. You always thought Jeonghan should have gone into law like you and Joshua, he certainly had the intelligence for it, but he didn’t particularly have a drive to become a lawyer, and in his eyes it was too much work if he wasn’t motivated. Times like this convince you that perhaps he was correct.
Except now that the two of you were dating, there was also the task of creating the evidence necessary to post your relationship, and it was tedious and confusing having to show the difference between you as friends and you dating when nothing has changed.
“We might as well just post a photo of you or I in lingerie if you want to make it look more like a real relationship.” Jeonghan said teasingly, although you didn’t miss the hint of frustration in the growl of his voice.
“Gross.”
“Let me see the photos you’ve taken at least.” You handed your phone to Jeonghan, moving your attention back to the case in front of you. Malcom Optics vs. Kim and Hogan. You wanted to tear your eyes out. “These are boyfriend-y enough!”
“They look like all the other photos I have of you!”
“Everyone else was convinced we were dating beforehand, that’s definitely relationship kindling.”
You reached our for your phone from his hands, grabbing a highlighter. “It’s not enough. Apparently, something has changed.”
“Fine then. Kiss me.”
You dropped your highlighter, and it clacked to the floor.
“Excuse me?”
“You wanted to show that something has changed, what do people in relationships do? They kiss.” Jeonghan explained nonchalantly, leaning down to grab your highlighter. “We can post a kissing photo, you’re right, it’s more believable this way.”
“B-But…”
“It’s not like we’ve never kissed before, anyway.”
He was right, and you cringed at the memory of being drunk with Jeonghan. The two of you had spent a couple of nights in university drinking your problems away on the floor of your dorm when your roommate was away (and considering the sheer number of parties she spent her time at, you and Jeonghan had a semi frequent tradition), and one such night after an emotional day of being accused of cheating, you ended up making out with an equally wasted Jeonghan, only for the two of you to wake up with an insurmountable feeling of dread and regret. The two of you had always known whatever relationship between the two of you was platonic, but that night destroyed any sort of wondering. There was no way you had feelings for him if it resulted in that awful dread. And it made you so nervous to experience it once more.
“Y/N?”
“Fine.”
You got up from the desk to sit on Jeonghan’s lap. The seats at this coffee shop were comfortable, but not enough for two people to sit together. Jeonghan felt himself tense up as you settled into his lap. It had been way too long since the two of you kissed, and a strange feeling settled in his stomach.
“Ready?” You asked him, moving your phone into position.
“Guess I have to be.”
Jeonghan placed his hand so his thumb nestled just in front of your ear, holding the back of your neck securely, and closed his eyes as he kissed you, waiting for the click of your phone camera, which came quickly. You quickly pulled away to look at the results, ignoring the way your stomach dropped. It meant nothing. But why was it lingering?
“This actually looks good. We look like we could actually be dating here.”
You hummed in satisfaction, moving back to your desk to focus once more on this case, and you hoped Jeonghan missed the coy smile on your lips.
He was too busy thinking about how his own felt.
Day 7 - Friday 9th November
“Sofia is hosting a party, we’re going once you’re free from work.” Jeonghan’s voice was gravelly over the phone, and the reception in your office was so bad, you were barely getting every other word.
“Who’s Sofia again?” You asked, hardly paying attention to the question. Instead, your attention was trained on the office door on the other side of your office, where your coworker, Eunwoo, resided. You just watched as two senior partners had stepped in, and it had been now 26 minutes since the door closed. Were they going to promote him over you? Or perhaps he was getting fired? You had seen him grab one too many pens from the office storage room, he could have been selling them to make a bit of side money. Probably not. But could he?
“Vernon’s sister, try to keep up.”
“Right yeah, sister.”
“Who’s sister?”
“Umm…”
Jeonghan sighed on the phone, and you winced at his tone. “You’re working too hard. Or overthinking. One of the two. Either way, you need this party.”
“I’ve got so much work to do, Hannie.” You told him, taking note of the time. There were two shadows by the base of Eunwoo’s door. Someone’s feet? Was the meeting over yet?
“But it’s a Friday! You can work on the weekend. I’ll drive you, and I’ll stay sober so I can take you home. Besides, Joshua is going to be there.”
You perked up at the sound of his name. “Really? He’s actually coming?”
“Yeah, he called me earlier to make sure you and I were coming, and I told him you were. You don’t wanna flake on him, do you?”
You sighed. Your resolve was always diminished when Joshua was involved.
“Fine.” You smiled, imagining Jeonghan celebrating on the other side of the line. “I have to stay back late though, can you bring me a change of clothes? Something comfy though.”
“Got it, I’ll bring dinner and your sexiest ensemble. Bye!”
“Wait-“
Day 7 (cont.)
Just like he promised, at 7:43, Jeonghan showed up at your office door, with your clothes (which were a lot tighter than you would have liked) in a bag and a pizza box in the other. He settled on the other side of your desk as you finished up, and listened as you bitched about the meeting Eunwoo had which lasted a whole 34 minutes, which is insane for what looked like an unscheduled meeting, and were they really going to pick Eunwoo over you? I mean he’s a good lawyer but the pens!
Eventually he managed to get you to stop talking and follow him to his car before driving you over to Sofia’s new place. She had just moved, to a much more relaxed neighbourhood, hence the big party. While you and your friends were close to or had just reached their 30s, with you being on the cusp at 29 (Jeonghan is old and is already in the decade ahead of you, a fact you have mentioned to him several times), Sofia was still in her early 20s, and that was definitely reflected in the party she had set up (with the help of Vernon, who was perpetually stuck at 16). Music was blaring from the house, and you silently cursed Jeonghan for dragging you out. You knew exactly how this party was going to end - with you drunk, having embarrassed yourself in at least three different ways, and passed out somewhere to nurse a major hangover in the morning. At least this time Jeonghan would stay sober, true to his word, and could take care of you. Hopefully that comes with making sure you don’t embarrass yourself, but you wouldn’t bet on it.
You instinctively reached for his hand as Jeonghan led you to the house, and you were reminded of your job. This was a big party, your friends would be there, you had to play the role you were given. Beside you, Jeonghan was reminded of the same fact.
You almost forgot everything as you approached the front door, and saw him waiting for you. Joshua waved you over, and you felt the air knocked out of you as you and Jeonghan walked up and he engulfed you two in his arms.
“I heard you guys finally started going out! Took you long enough to ask them out, Jeonghan.” Joshua’s voice was honey mellow and so soothing, you were sure just like honey it was antibacterial. You hadn’t even entered the house, and you already felt drunk on his touch. Yet your heart seemed to drop at the fact that Josh didn’t seem at all jealous or upset at this development. That’s probably a good thing? But it definitely wasn’t the outcome you wanted.
“We should get Y/N to the kitchen, I’m sure they want something to get their mind off of work.” Jeonghan told Joshua, who let you slip out of his arms as he led the two of you inside the house.
“Tough week Y/N?” Joshua asked delicately, placing his hand on your shoulder, and every worry you had seemed to drain away, only for the reminder of Eunwoo’s closed door to come right back.
“Just feel like I’m putting in effort that will never be recognised.” You grumbled, and leaned closer into Jeonghan’s side. Joshua’s sweet gaze reminded you of your goal: you wanted so desperately for him to be jealous, so you nuzzled your forehead against Jeonghan’s bicep. “Luckily I’ve had my boyfriend here to make everything better.”
You don’t think you could ever get used to that word, and evidently neither could Jeonghan, who felt as though he was choking on air. You felt the vibrations of his discomfort, but Joshua didn’t seem to notice.
“Ahh, young love. Or, I suppose newfound love. I really am surprised you two didn’t start dating earlier.” Seungcheol’s voice suddenly permeated the air, and you watched as he settled next to Joshua, facing you and Jeonghan with a friendly gaze. “You drinking tonight, Jeonghan?”
“Designated driver.” He told him, running his thumb up and down your arm. Jeonghan didn’t miss the way Joshua looked at that small action, and he felt a glimmer of pride under his skin. “I think Y/N will want a drink though?”
“Oh god yes, Seungcheol, will you mix me something? Put those bartender days to use.” You hooked your arm around Seungcheol’s and let him guide you to the drink station (Sofia’s kitchen island which had a cupboard fully stocked with alcohol and mixers).
“Wow, you and Y/N.” Joshua smiled, and Jeonghan grinned coyly at his friend. “Why’d you finally ask them out?”
He stole a glance to you and Seungcheol. You didn’t notice his gaze, and why would you? You were too far away. But you seemed so in your world, like you always had been, something Jeonghan found endearing.
“Just realised I wanted more. Didn’t want to lose them to someone else.”
“As if you would ever lose Y/N, you two are stuck together. Honestly, I was a little jealous of it growing up, they would always pick you over me, guess this is another case of that.” Jeonghan hadn’t realised until now how Joshua’s skin was tinted pink, the blush of alcohol settling over his cheekbones. Was that why he was rambling like this? “But then I realised I had to find my own Y/N, make my own soulmate. Anyway, I’m glad you finally asked them out!”
Joshua stumbled back towards the drink station where you and Seungcheol were waiting for him. Yeah, Jeonghan wasn’t too sure he would be able to make Joshua jealous. But he owed it to you to try anyway. You weren’t always as aware as you wanted to think you were, but Jeonghan was, and he was acutely aware of the way you froze and smiled as Joshua approached you.
Over a decade had passed since you were seventeen, and you were still completely whipped for Joshua Hong.
Jeonghan knew this, he went into this knowing it, but why did it feel different now?
Day 7 (cont.)
Two hours in and you were officially drunk. It didn’t take much - you were out of practise from your days of drinking through the night as an undergrad, and too often your nights our were at charity functions and galas where you had to stay on the safe side of tipsy, and not let loose like you were currently doing.
You had lost Jeonghan a while ago, instead having spent most of the night with Joshua, catching up and taking shots together. He’d been having a stressful time at his own firm, and was happy to accompany you as you drank your worries about Eunwoo and making partner away.
“It’s just so stupid, cause Eunwoo is my age! He’s not more qualified than me, and he’s definitely not a better lawyer than me, cause he steals pens!”
“You mentioned the pens!”
“It’s important!”
You felt a tear roll down your cheek as you drunkenly recalled the events of the day, and before it several more followed. Joshua didn’t notice, you made no sound, but the stress of being at the office for 53 hours this past week only to get no recognition became so overwhelming so quickly, too quickly for your drunken self to register.
“Josh, did you make Y/N cry?”
You barely registered that Jeonghan had walked up to you until you heard his voice, the voice you had been missing for the whole party.
“H-Hannie…” You choked out in sobs, reaching your arms out for him. He obliged, pulling you close to him, letting you cry into his torso.
“Y/N, you’re crying?” Joshua questioned, but you could barely hear him, your face pressed against the fabric of Jeonghan’s shirt. It wasn’t a comfortable position, to cry sitting down into someone’s chest, but right now you weren’t thinking about that.
“Hannie w-where did you g-go, I miss- I missed you.” You sobbed, barely sounding out the words. “St-stupid Eunwoo and h-his stupid pens.”
Jeonghan cooed, running his hand through your hair soothingly. “Maybe we should go home? You need to get to bed. Josh, I’ll see you tomorrow? Say goodnight to Seungcheol for me.”
Jeonghan grasped your hand, pulling you up, and guided you out of the house to the car.
“Why are we l-leaving?”
“You’re way too drunk. Besides, we’re helping set up Wonwoo’s venue tomorrow, better get some sleep.” Jeonghan reminded you, tucking you into the passenger’s seat and clipping the seat belt around you. You hummed, shuffling until you felt comfy, and curled up as close as you could. Your eyes fluttered closed as the car started, and soon you felt yourself dozing off, the salty tears slipping past your lips.
“You’re such a good boyfriend, Hannie.”
Had you not been so drunk, maybe you wouldn’t have said it so easily. Maybe he would have felt more uneasy about the term. He hadn’t even noticed it until you were well and truly passed out, gone to the world.
Day 8 - Saturday 10th November
The streaming sunlight that peeked through your blinds was enough to awaken the deep nausea within you, yet the banging in your head begged you to stay in bed. This was such a gross hangover, and one you hadn’t had to deal with in years.
Who let you drink this much?
With as much strength as you could muster, you stumbled to the bathroom, luckily you had an ensuite, and felt the contents of your stomach escape up and out through your throat into the toilet bowl. The base of your throat burned, and so did your eyes, as more tears threatened to escape over the fiery sensation. You stayed there, waiting for another wave of nausea, when you felt Jeonghan’s hands push back the hair from your face, and rub your back soothingly.
“Why did I drink so much…” You whispered, your voice hoarse and sore.
“You’re just too out of practise, Y/N.” Jeonghan told you, pulling you up slowly. “You need to spend more nights drinking with me and not at the office.”
He handed you a glass of water, which you greedily took from his hands, gulping it down as fast as you could without suffocating, until you went to fast and started coughing it all up.
“God you’re a mess when you’re hungover.”
“Thanks, Jeonghan.”
He grabbed the box of panadol in your bottom cupboard drawer, handing it to you. God, he was far too familiar with your apartment, although you were fairly familiar with his. Well, actually not quite as familiar, because he still has a roommate (and according to Jeonghan, they are necessary for the nicer apartment he lives in on his salary, even though you’ve told him is useless since he spends most of his time here) that you never wanted to bother.
“We have to be at Wonwoo’s venue in three hours, you think that’s enough time to get ready?” You nodded, swallowing the pills quickly.
“That should be enough time for the panadol to kick in.”
“Good, because I’m only being this nice to you until then.”
You frowned mockingly. “Don’t you have to be the sweet and caring boyfriend?” You cringed at the way that word sounded as it came out of your mouth, and watched as Jeonghan did too. “God, I don’t think twenty days is enough time to get used to that.”
“I don’t think a lifetime is enough time.” Jeonghan let himself out of the bathroom, leaving you alone on the tiled floor. “Take a shower, then come and get some food!” He yelled, and you closed the door behind you, terrified of whatever horror he had cooked up (and you used the term cooked very loosely here).
Day 8 (cont.)
It had become a tradition for you to start holding hands with Jeonghan when he would drive you. Somewhere along the car ride, his hand met yours, and they joined, not a word to be said. You didn’t think about it. You wondered if he did.
The venue wasn’t too dissimilar to last week, but it was way cleaner. Once again, you and Jeonghan were separated, sent to do different jobs under the watchful eye of Minghao (and his faithful minions Jun and Jihoon).
“Do you think he gets stressed out or is he just like that?” Sakura whispered to you. She was friends with Wonwoo’s fiance, and wasn’t all too familiar with Wonwoo’s friends. You felt for her, most of the people here were on his side, and you were one of the only people Sakura knew here, having met previously in university.
“Both? He is a little bit like that, but Wonwoo is a close friend, I think he just wants everything to go well.” You told her in hushed breath. “We all want it to go well. Wonwoo is such a good guy, so is Eliza.”
“I know!” Sakura gushed, a little loud but not enough to catch the attention of Minghao. “They’re so cute together, I was so excited when she told me she finally got engaged.”
You smiled, making marks with electrical tape at each measure for Seungcheol to place chairs at later on.
“What about you though? Are you going to get engaged any time soon?”
You gulped, feeling awkward under the heat of her questioning gaze. “Jeonghan and I have only started dating, marriage is so out of the picture right now.”
“Don’t be modest! Chan told me you and Jeonghan have basically been together since high school.”
“That’s an exaggeration.” You told her, not meeting her eyes. It felt so strange, so deceitful, to keep up this lie. Were you a bad person for this? It was harmless, just a little lie to keep Jeonghan from Jiwon, but it followed you everywhere.
“We were just friends back then.” We’re just friends now. “We’ve just always been close.”
“Uh huh, and did you have feelings for him all this time?”
Wrong guy.
“I’ve always loved him.” You told Sakura, and she began to giggle once more.
That one wasn’t a lie. You have loved Jeonghan for a very long time. It’s just always been a platonic, simple love. You wondered if it still was, and then you wondered why it wouldn’t be.
But it was clear that no matter what it is, it was no longer simple.
Day 11 - Tuesday 13th November
“Hello?”
“Y/N! It’s Wonwoo.”
“Oh, hey Wonwoo! What’s up?”
“Nothing, nothing! Look, I know I haven’t been hanging out much-“
“Stop, don’t apologise! You’ve been planning a wedding, and we’re all so excited for it!”
“You’re too sweet, Y/N. Anyway, I wanted to congratulate you and Jeonghan!”
“Oh, you heard?”
“Can’t stop hearing about it. Mingyu was being a little pissy when he found out, kept saying this must have been why you didn’t like him back in year 12, instead of the fact that he face planted into a pool in front of the entire year group two days before he confessed to you.”
“I forgot about that!”
“Don’t worry, I put him in his place.”
“Ahh, thank you Wonwoo.”
“Of course. How did it go, by the way? Who asked who out?”
“Oh, I don’t wanna waste your time…”
“No no! Eliza wants to know too, go on.”
“Ahh, well, we were just hanging out one night and… one thing led to another…”
“My god did you fuck him on your leather couch because that poor piece of furniture has seen more than enough-“
“No! No, we made out, jesus Wonwoo.”
“Sorry, sorry, go on.”
“Wait what do you mean seen more than enough?”
“Okay you didn’t hear this from me but you should ask Soonyoung what he got up to that week two years ago when he was house sitting for you.”
“Oh god oh god...”
“Anyway the story?”
“I’m burning that couch.”
“Moving on.”
“Right, well we realised we both had feelings for each other, so we just decided to go for it.”
“That’s so cute! That reminds me of when we were all in uni, I got this call from Jeonghan in the middle of the night-“
“Sorry Wonwoo, the doorbell’s just rung, that’ll be Jeonghan. Do you wanna say hi?”
“Nah, I should get back to wedding planning. Have a good night Y/N!”
“Night Wonwoo.”
You hung up the phone as your door opened, Jeonghan’s figure standing in the doorway.
“I got kebabs!”
You ran up to rip the food out of his hands. “God I love you.”
He grinned smugly. “I know. Let’s eat!”
“Don’t sit there!”
Day 12 - Wednesday 14th November
cheolie_cherries: you guys are sickeningly cute 🤮 🤮
sunshineseok: about time you started dating!
julijuli33: oh my god he’s actually taken 😭 good for y/n but we lost today
wonworld: congrats guys!!
You couldn’t help but smile at the comments on Jeonghan’s instagram post of the two of you. There was a sneaky one he had taken of you working (which you had called and immediately asked him to take down, and of course he refused), as well as the kiss photo, to really prove the two of you were dating. Looking at it now sent flutters to your stomach. You had never seen yourself like this. Sure, you had dated, but it never really got all that serious, and you weren’t one for PDA, so photos like this were rare. That was probably what was causing this feeling. Right?
“Earth to Y/N.”
You snapped your head up to see Eunchae, your newest paralegal, at the doorway between your office and the hallway, grinning at you with a stack of files in her hand. She walked in, placing them on your desk.
“These need to be checked for errors.” She told you, and you waved her off.
“Got it. Anything else I can help you with?”
“Hmm, you could tell me what it is that’s on your phone making you look so giddy?”
“Nothing!” You quickly yelled, cringing at the volume your voice was raised to. “It was nothing, just having a good morning.”
“Mmm, sure…” She smiled knowingly at you, before walking away, closing the door softly behind her. When you heard the click of the door, you groaned, letting your body fall against the desk. That was too close.
Why were you even ogling? You had work to do, and you would be damned if you spent too long staring at your phone and it cost you the promotion.
They were announcing the newest junior partner next Friday, making the decision at the end of this week. You had to win. So you turned your phone onto silent and placed it face down on the furthest corner of your desk, burying your head into the paralegal’s work. No matter how much it beckoned you back, you would not lose.
Day 15 - Saturday 17th November
When you and Jeonghan stepped into Wonwoo’s venue the Saturday before the wedding, you were practically expecting a fairytale, and that’s almost what you saw. Minghao had dedicated so much time, you knew Eliza and Wonwoo would be so shocked when they finally saw the finished product.
Still, there was much to be done, and with less and less time, everyone was rushing even more to get as much as they could done. This time, you and Sakura were stringing up fairy lights across the pews for the optimal mood lighting, as Minghao called it, and a fire hazard as Jihoon called it (so they compromised to have it on the ceiling above the pews, meaning you had to stand on a 3 decade old ladder while Sakura tried her best to guarantee it didn’t collapse).
You slowly got down from the stairs, guided down by Sakura, when you saw Joshua waiting for you, and you felt your heart beat out of your chest.
“Hey Y/N, can I borrow you for a sec?” He asked, his deep brown eyes looked through you, as if they knew all your secrets.
“Yeah, I mean, Sakura do you…?”
“No, go ahead, I need a break anyway.”
Joshua offered you his arm, to which you took, and he led you to the corridor, secluded, hidden from prying eyes.
“What did you want to talk to me about?” You asked, waiting for Joshua as he glanced away from your view.
“Look, I really am happy for you, I promise,” He began, and you recoiled slightly, holding your elbows. What was he going to say? “But I’m questioning Jeonghan.”
“Like, as a person?”
“No, as a boyfriend.” The word dripped with malice from Joshua’s lips. “Look, I know you’ve only just started going out, but he went out with a lot of people before you,”
“So did I.”
“Yeah but that’s not the point, Y/N. I’m just saying, he’s putting on this whole show of being a good boyfriend, and being faithful and kind, but he never has been before.” You stood there silently, rocking slightly, but it didn’t seem to stop Joshua. “He’s known you practically all his life, he could have had you at any point, why now? And why is he suddenly acting so different compared to his past relationships?”
Joshua put a hand on your arm gently. “I’m not trying to hurt you, but if I were you, I’d be more suspicious of his motives.” He began rubbing circles into your forearm. “I love you, I don’t want to see you get hurt.”
“What about Jeonghan? Don’t you care if he gets hurt?” You asked, your voice barely a whisper.
“He’s not the one I’m most worried about.”
You stepped back, and Joshua’s hand quickly dropped from your arm. “I need to go.”
You turned away, and walked back to the venue before he could say anything.
“Just think about what I said, Y/N!” Joshua yelled behind you, but that was the last thing you wanted to do.
Day 15 (cont.)
You were quiet the rest of the day, feeling more drained from that interaction than the intense physical labour Minghao was making you do (maybe it was the combination of both that killed you). You don’t think anyone noticed, aside from Sakura, who realised you weren’t talking but didn’t say much, but you were terrified of someone else realising, so when Jeonghan approached you with his car keys in his hand you didn’t hesitate to drag him out to the car park before anyone else could follow.
The two of you had been on the road for ten minutes in silence before Jeonghan finally broke it. “Are you going to tell me what’s wrong?”
“Who said anything’s wrong?” You did your best to speak nonchalantly, but Jeonghan didn’t miss the quiver in your voice.
“I’m not an idiot, I can tell when you’re upset.” You were still five minutes from your apartment, you couldn’t dance around it for that long. “Tell me what’s wrong.”
“Joshua pulled me to the side, asked me if we could talk, and then he told me I should be suspicious of you and your motives.” You admitted, looking out the passenger window. You felt choked up. How could he think like this?
“That’s what you’re worried about, Y/N?” Jeonghan questioned, a slight smile on his lips.
“You’re not?”
“Josh has been super stressed at his firm right? It’s cause one of the senior partners was caught embezzling. That, and he’s the only one of us going to Wonwoo’s wedding without a date.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, of course he’s going to act weirdly.” He brushed off your concerns with such an ease you forgot why they upset you in the first place. “Don’t take it to heart, I’m sure he’ll get back to normal soon.”
You breathed out a shaky sigh, feeling your doubts subside and settle.
“It’s cute you were so upset though.” He teased, and you groaned, cupping your face with your hands. “You were so worried about what people thought about me, about your boyfriend.”
“Shut up, Yoon.”
“How can I? My partner cares about me too much.”
“I regret everything.”
He chuckled, stopping his remarks as he watched you calm out the corner of his eye. A secondary realisation as to why Joshua was acting like this was on the front of his mind, but it was nowhere near as comforting. No, this thought was one that was now threatening, and could result in losing you forever.
Jeonghan didn’t want to think about the implications of Joshua being jealous. Instead, he focused on you, and the way you stared out the passenger window.
Day 15 (cont.)
“Have you still got that 12-pack at the back of your fridge?”
“Go nuts.” You told him, kicking your shoes off and lying down on the carpet on the floor. You and Jeonghan had made a mutual decision to pretend the couch wasn’t there until after Wonwoo’s wedding, then you could go shopping for a new one, and until then there was always the floor. “I haven’t been drinking much, trying to just get through this wedding and the promotion.”
“How’s that going?” Jeonghan asked, and you heard the faint pop of a bottle opener from your kitchen.
“They said they would make their decision on who would be the next junior partner by the end of the week, and make the announcement the next week. It’s Saturday now, and I haven’t heard anything, so I know what that means.”
Jeonghan settled next to you, handing you an opened beer bottle and clinking it against his own before taking a swig. “Don’t be too worried, maybe they’ll tell you you’re getting the promotion on Monday.”
“Maybe.”
��You give your everything to that firm. They’d be stupid to not want you as partner.”
“They would be stupid! How’s your boss?”
The two of you spent your evening reminiscing and complaining (two of your favourite pastimes) as you drank more and more, getting gradually more drunk, unlike on the night of Sofia’s party where you got embarrassingly shitfaced way too quickly. At some point in the night, you had cozied up to Jeonghan, and now you were nuzzled up in his arms, too comfortable to even consider moving.
“God, this whole thing is so stupid!” You yelled, throwing your pillow across the room with as much force as you could gather, sending it a few feet ahead of you. “We gotta fake date to get people off your back and onto mine, meanwhile Joshua’s not gotten jealous once and we haven’t even seen Jiwon!”
“Don’t say her name three times, or she’s gonna appear.” Jeonghan told you, wide eyed, taking a quick look around the room just to confirm she wasn’t there.
“Pussy.”
“She’s coming to the rehearsal dinner though!” Jeonghan told you, wagging his pointer finger in the air, making you giggle. “And that’s Friday, so it’s coming up soon.”
“Ahh the rehearsal dinner. What are we rehearsing again?”
“We’re rehearsing how to fake date, Y/N, we’ve been over this.”
“And we have a whole dinner for it?”
“Yes! How kind of Wonwoo.”
You burst into fits of laughter, lolling your head into the crook of Jeonghan’s shoulder as you laughed, and he followed suit. Moments like this were ones where you felt so comfortable with him, like the bubble was intact once more.
“We should start rehearsals now!” Jeonghan exclaimed, grabbing your elbows excitedly. “What do people in relationships do?”
You shrugged, and his arms moved with your shoulders. “I don’t know, you’re basically my first boyfriend.”
“Well you’re the first time I’m being a boyfriend.”
“What does that mean?”
“I don’t know.” He admitted, giggling. The two of you were so far gone, and neither of you had the capacity to realise it. “But I know people in relationships kiss! Kiss me Y/N!”
“Ew gross, you have cooties.” You pushed away his pouted lips.
“No I don’t! I’m vaccinated against cooties!” He whined, pulling you closer to him.
“What if I have cooties?”
“Just kiss me!”
Jeonghan grabbed your face, guiding it to his own, where his lips met yours in a kiss. It was delicate, a kiss for the sake of kissing, and you relished in the feeling. There was a comfort to kissing Jeonghan, a comfort you hadn’t felt for several years. He was comfort, and his kisses were a perfect specimen of that comfort. Kissing him was returning home after a winter’s day.
But decisions were sobering, and the feeling of your lips against his suddenly drained all the alcohol from Jeonghan’s body. He pulled away slowly to see you still half lidded, barely aware of your surroundings. He stole a glance at the clock on the wall, 2AM. Maybe the two of you should end the night here, before you did something you couldn’t go back from.
“Time to sleep, Y/N.”
“Don’t wanna.” You shrugged him off. “Wanna kiss you more!”
Jeonghan chuckled. “Me too. But we can’t.”
As he tucked you into bed, you were already on the verge of passing out, but he was wide awake. Jeonghan found himself hoping the hangover would be a bad one, a distraction from the memories he knew would flood back. He didn’t need to be reminded of how stupid he could be.
Day 16 - Sunday 18th November
Your hangover wasn’t as bad as last Saturday, but you still didn’t feel like dealing with the pounding headache. This time, as you went to wash your face and drink water in the bathroom, there was no Jeonghan to hold your hair back and give you panadol. He wasn’t in the kitchen causing a mess (cooking) either. No, your apartment was strangely quiet without his presence. As the pain in your head began to subside, you checked your phone to see a message sent three hours prior.
Hannie: work emergency - had to leave early. drink lots of water <3
Something felt so off about the message. Jeonghan’s boss was fairly laidback, and he had never had work emergencies that made him go to the studio on weekends. But you were also way too hungover to question it.
You hoped Jeonghan’s hangover had already passed.
Day 18 - Monday 20th November
You called Jeonghan twice. It went to voicemail both times.
Day 19 - Wednesday 21st November
There was a flurry among the paralegals that day. You tried to ignore it, to keep your head down, but the amount of papers flapping in the air made you feel like there was a hoard of pigeons down the corridor. You hated the ‘open door unless in a meeting’ policy at work: half of the lawyers your level didn’t even follow the rule anyway. You wouldn’t have followed it had you not wanted so desperately to show what a good team member you were, and yet here you were, on a Wednesday afternoon, with nothing to show you it.
There was an annoying rap against your open door, and you briefly lifted your head to see Cha Eunwoo leaning against your doorframe. Eugh. Cha Eunwoo. The two of you were in the same cohort: graduated from high school in the same year, graduated from uni at the same time, went to the same law school, and both went straight to Kim-Byun Legal Services, where you’ve spent the entirety of your careers. And throughout law school and now work, you have wanted to beat Cha Eunwoo no matter the cost, and you never managed it.
“Can I help you? I’ve got quite a bit of work to complete.”
Eunwoo waltzed right in, taking the seat in front of your desk. “I have news, but you have to promise not to tell anyone.”
“Do I even get a chance to say no? Not interested?”
Eunwoo was smart. You were smart too, but you liked to think (and Jeonghan liked to tell you) that you were smarter than most of those law students you competed against. Sure, they studied hard, they were good lawyers. But you were quick witted, and they couldn’t keep up. Eunwoo could. If it were anyone else, you wouldn’t be opposed to playing dirty, to pulling little tricks where you could to show him up, but Eunwoo would catch on. The only thing he didn’t seem to notice was how desperate you were to beat him. He never realised the battle you constantly fought, and it killed you. So you had to work twice as hard, three times as much, and play by the rules, just to win a challenge where you were the only one competing.
“I made partner!”
(At this point you stopped writing. This was the first time Eunwoo had ever managed to completely distract you.)
“I’m not supposed to tell anyone before Friday, that’s when they’re announcing it. But I get the new contract this evening, and you and I came in together, I know you would tell me if it was you!”
No shit you would. You would love to act all classy and poised, only to rub it in his face that you won! You did better! But no, Eunwoo won. Throughout everything, this was the first concrete time he’s won, and it’s shattered your reserve. You’re a good actor though, something that helped you get through this job, so you keep your head down.
“That’s great Eunwoo, congratulations. We’ll celebrate properly next week, I’ve got a rehearsal dinner on Friday though.” You met his gaze with a smile, even though there was rage behind it. Eunwoo didn’t seem to notice. “Now, I’ve got to get back to work.”
He nodded, barely containing his grin, shuffling out of your office. “See you later Y/N.”
God you wanted to cry. You wanted to yell and scream, cursing the world, the senior partners, and most of all Cha Eunwoo, who had showed you up once more.Your composure was slipping, a veil that threatened to fall off your head and reveal your facade to the world, but you refused to lose it at work. Instead, you closed the door as gently as you could, and hoped to god that the third time you called him, Jeonghan would pick up.
“Please, please, please pick up…” You whispered, as if you were summoning him.
“Hey, this is Jeonghan. I can’t come to the phone right now…”
Fuck. Voicemail. Once again.
You heard a beep and considered hanging up, but instead decided to send a message.
“Hey, um, I don’t know if you’re just busy, or you’re mad at me, I really hope it’s not the second. I haven’t heard from you in a while. That’s why I’m calling, I guess. Oh, and I’m not gonna be partner. I got passed over for it. Cha fucking Eunwoo made partner. Fuck. Sorry, I’m rambling now. I hope you’re doing okay? You know you can always come to me, but if you don’t want to that’s okay I guess, I’ll leave you be.”
Day 19 (cont.)
When you went home that day to punch your pillows and scream about Cha Eunwoo, the last thing you expected was to see Yoon Jeonghan walk in with chicken and beer as if nothing had happened, which was especially strange, as it was so expected on a normal day. But something was off. Something had changed. You just couldn’t quite put your thumb on what it was.
“Are you mad at me?” You asked, your eyes more glassy than you realised. You could barely see Jeonghan, but you knew he had that stupid damn smile. Right now it was infuriating. “Is that why you disappeared?”
“No, never.” He told you, setting the chicken down on your dinner table. “Things really have just been so busy at work, I’ve barely had time for anyone.”
“But you have time to drop by with chicken?”
“Cha Eunwoo is an idiot compared to you.” Jeonghan told you, opening the can of beer with a hiss. “They missed out on not promoting you.”
You didn’t say anything in response, just stuffing your mouth with chicken. Jeonghan passed you a beer can. “Maybe I shouldn’t. I’ve got work in the morning, and last time we drank I didn’t remember anything after we started bitching about that one actor, Park Sunwoo.”
Jeonghan smiled at you, but you barely noticed, your expression trained on the can in front of you.
“Yeah, I don’t remember either,” He told you. “But one can’t hurt. We drank way too much last time, I’ll keep you in check.”
You shrugged, opening the can, and clinking it against Jeonghan’s. “Thanks boyfriend.” The metal made a satisfying clank noise, and you missed the way Jeonghan looked over at you. Maybe it’s changed, or maybe you’ve been missing it for a long time.
Jeonghan is your blind spot. You didn’t like surprises, you didn’t like feeling caught out, and you would always make sure you weren’t, until it came to Jeonghan. No matter how fast you ran, he always seemed to beat you by a few seconds. No matter how strong you were, he could always lift more. You and Jeonghan both had that same competitive drive, but you could never quite match him. As a teenager it pushed you to be better and better, but you’ve come to accept it. You’ll never beat Jeonghan. That’s why it’s always better to be on his side.
You were observant, but you let your guard down around him. That was how Jeonghan won. He never let his guard down around anyone. He didn’t need to have it up around you, he didn’t keep secrets from you (and you didn’t keep them from him). But he kept everything close to his chest, and he wouldn’t let himself get caught out at any moment.
You wondered if it was hard for him to never reveal himself fully. You knew he still kept to himself around you. It was the only way he could still play tricks, pull pranks, and he loved it. He wouldn’t stay reserved if he didn’t want to. Still, it’s tough to feel like you can never fully reveal your facade.
But there were moments he did. Like tonight, as he tucked you into bed once you fell asleep, and kissed your forehead with a sweetness he didn’t know was there. Maybe he would reveal it to you one day, but all in good time.
You didn’t like feeling caught out. Jeonghan hated it with everything he’s got.
Day 21 - Friday 23rd November
“How are you feeling about seeing Jiwon?” Jeonghan didn’t answer, but the grip he had on your hand tightened as he stared down at the road.
He and Jiwon were a bad match. He knew that, he knew that from the moment they met and she started talking about having a husband around at home to help with the kids one day. Jeonghan knew he could never be that. Sure, he had daydreamed about settling down, raising a family. Jeonghan could never be the husband Jiwon wanted him to be. Could never be the husband he wanted to become. But she was just so pretty, and she would stare down at him with a feverish grin that just made him weak in the knees, how could he say no to her?
So for three weeks, they went out, which for Jeonghan just meant promises of another day he never intended to keep so he could get back to her apartment. But she fully intended on keeping those promises, and soon she was the one setting up dates, and changing her name in his phone (which really freaked Jeonghan out, because, when did she have access to his phone?) to seem more like a girlfriend. Maybe Jeonghan wanted a girlfriend, but he definitely didn’t want to be a boyfriend, and now he was stuck acting one.
Jiwon didn’t believe him when he told her weeks later that they were incompatible. Why would she? She believed every lie that dripped from his lips, and couldn’t wrap her head around why it suddenly changed overnight. She thought he was lying, just trying to keep her away, but a good girlfriend doesn’t give up so easily.
And so began the midnight calls, the uninvited show ups to his workplace or his apartment (Seungcheol definitely had a fun time telling her off, not that it kept her away), and the letters slid under your door begging for your help getting Jeonghan back. This is what led to the whole thing. She seemed to calm down once Jeonghan posted you on his instagram, but neither of you could predict what she would do when she saw you together.
She was Eliza’s sister in law (Eliza’s brother’s wife’s sister, who just had to attend), so her attendance was expected, and you knew it made Jeonghan all the more nervous, especially in the way he would speed round corners. It didn’t frighten you, but worry for your friend escaped you anyway, and you squeezed his hand whenever the car revved.
Jeonghan pulled into the street along Wonwoo’s house, seeing cars littered along the side, and Jeonghan pulled the car into park. You took his hand off the gear shift and brought it to your lips, kissing it comfortingly. “Everything’s gonna be alright. I promise.”
“You promise?” He took a glance at you, and smiled cheekily. “Well what happens if you break the promise? What do I get?”
“I’ll cook you an actually decent brekkie to apologise, not those rubber pancakes you’ve been serving me these past few weeks.”
“Hey! You love those pancakes!”
“The texture is so chewy and terrible Jeonghan, I’m begging you to just use a recipe.”
“I don’t need one.” He huffed, but he never let go of your hand.
You rolled your eyes at his dramatics. Honestly, he was right. You did love the pancakes. Of course, they were way too chewy and tasted of nothing without lashings of sugar and lemon, but you loved that Jeonghan had been making them for you all the past mornings you had spent together.
“Cmon, it’s time to head inside.”
The two of you walked hand in hand towards the door, and you could feel the deep breaths Jeonghan took to calm his pulsing heart. He really didn’t want to cause a scene or do anything to ruin Wonwoo’s rehearsal dinner (or god forbid the actual wedding), but he felt so much more secure with your hand in his.
You weren’t surprised to see Wonwoo’s place completely packed. He and Eliza were having a fairly small wedding, but with the sheer number of family members on Eliza’s side, their starter apartment was bursting at the seams. You held onto Jeonghan as tightly as you could, and still you felt like he was slipping from your grasp.
“Y/N! Jeonghan!” A familiar voice greeted you, and you turned to see Jun greet you. You hugged him gently as he started going on about seating plans (there wasn’t much of a plan, with half of the guests eating off of paper plates on the floor, but Wonwoo had made sure to save his nice carpet for you and a few of his friends). “Don’t worry, the two of you are together, of course. Minghao stayed up all night setting up this seating chart.” You scanned your eyes to see who was attending, and saw most of your friends, minus one.
“Is Joshua here?” You cut Jun off with a worried look. “He was acting really weird last Saturday.”
“Yeah, he’s helping out in the kitchen.” Jun told you, pointing down past the archway to where there was (hopefully steam) pouring out. “He seemed fine to me though, he’s probably over whatever it was. Oh! Mingyu’s just arrived. He’s so late, that goddamn best man should have been here an hour ago! Got to run.”
Jun rushed past you, leaving Jeonghan and you hand in hand in the entryway. Jeonghan turned to look at you. “Is this a I want to see Joshua and flaunt our thriving and perfect relationship at him so he gets jealous?”
You pushed his shoulder. “No. It’s an I think I should be avoiding him thing. I’m still a little shocked by what he told me.”
Jeonghan smiled down at you. “Good luck avoiding him when we’re sitting with him at dinner.”
“What?”
“Yeah, you really have to pay more attention to Jun’s rambles. They often contain useful information.”
You groaned, leaning your head against his arm. He smiled, leading you towards the carpet, where Seokmin and Seungkwan were already seated. You waved a hello towards them, not wanting to remove yourself from Jeonghan’s side.
“God these two are way too cute together.” Seokmin spoke, nudging Jeonghan’s side.
You blushed, hiding your face as much as you could. Jeonghan was almost shocked at your display, you were far too good at playing the doting S/O, but it was working. He watched the way Joshua stared at you from the kitchen doorway. He knew without a doubt from the way Joshua looked over at you how jealous he was. That was what he wanted, right?
After a few minutes of small talk, Joshua eventually sat down next to you (even though there was a free space between to Jeonghan and Seokmin, which Jihoon ended up filling, with his husband settling in next to him) and the rehearsal dinner began. Luckily, with Minghao as wedding planner, there was never a free moment for Joshua to steal your attention. Jeonghan wasn’t sure if you or him was more glad about the fact, but he kept an arm around you at all times, separating your shoulder from Joshua’s.
As the dinner went on, with less formality and more people moving around the space to congratulate the future couple and catch up with old friends, your ‘table’ settled into a comfortable talk. Jun was right, Joshua seemed fine, which only made Jeonghan feel more uneasy. It helped settle your nerves though, and Jeonghan realised your grip on his side had loosened, and you were leaning towards Joshua ever so slightly. No one else at the table would realise, but Jeonghan knew, and he was sure Joshua did too.
“Honestly I’m still surprised Jeonghan actually had the guts to ask Y/N out.” Seokmin said offhandedly, and you looked up at Jeonghan with a cute grin. You were so good at playing the role, but why didn’t it feel like a role anymore? Jeonghan must be losing his touch if he was falling for your act.
Joshua took a sip of his wine, smiling as he spoke. “We all thought you two would never get a date before you realised you liked each other. Good thing you finally manned up to it, Jeonghan.”
Your gaze suddenly snapped towards the crowd. “Why does everyone always assume Jeonghan asked me out?” Jeonghan tensed, and everyone surrounding you looked away from your inquisitive gaze. Joshua opened his mouth to speak, but he was cut off by Jiwon’s commanding presence.
She was so short and petite, keeping to herself, but she walked with such a force that commanded attention. Her eyes were trained not on Jeonghan, but instead focused closely on you.
“And who did ask who out?” She asked sweetly, but you felt your tongue go numb under her gaze.
Jeonghan held you closer to his side, and you settled into him with comfort. “We kissed, and both decided to go for it. It was mutual.”
She hummed, still staring at you. “Well. I’m happy for you two.” And with that, she turned on the ball of her foot, walking away like nothing happened. You let out a shaky breath, and felt Jeonghan do the same. As Seungkwan and Seokmin started hissing gossip about Jiwon, you reached out for Jeonghan’s hand, relishing in the comfort of his touch.
“God she’s terrifying.” You told him in a whisper. “At least it’s over.”
He grinned at you. “Damn, I was looking forward to your breakfast in bed special.”
“You think I’m serving you in my bed? You would spill it everywhere, no way am I cleaning up that mess.”
“You wound me, babe.”
Jeonghan knew Joshua was staring, maybe that’s why when the urge to kiss you overcame him, he took it, placing a kiss on your cheek, as close to your lips as he could get. You let him, only to wonder why well and truly after.
Day 22 - Saturday 24th November
You were awoken by the now familiar smell of Jeonghan’s rubber chicken pancakes, and you followed the smell out to the kitchen.
“How do you always manage to wake up before me?”
“You always sleep in way too late.” He told you, flipping a pancake onto your plate and pushing it towards you. “Last day!”
“Huh?”
“It’s the wedding today. After today, we will no longer be officially dating.”
“Oh, right.”
You didn’t realise how quickly three weeks could pass. There was a strange sense of dread that passed through your system, although you blamed the pancakes. It felt weird that after everything, tomorrow all would be as it was before, as if this whole ordeal never happened.
“We’re gonna have to stage a breakup, of course.” Jeonghan told you, still flipping pancakes. “But we can plan that out tomorrow. In the meantime eat up! We’ll have to leave in an hour.”
You nodded along, feeling too tired to speak so early in the morning (10:30). Jeonghan sat down next to you, shovelling down pancakes as quickly as he could (how he managed to chew through those was a mystery to you) before excusing himself to your bathroom while you continued eating. God, why were these so salty today? Jeonghan’s latest prank, you suspected, but you didn’t have the strength to confront him, especially once you heard the splash of the shower turning on. You began cleaning dishes, not waiting for Jeonghan to finish showering before you stole the hot water, and giggled as you heard his shrieks. Hopefully the wedding would give you a little bit more energy.
Day 22 (cont.)
You and Jeonghan arrived at the warehouse at 11:40. You still had a few minutes before the ceremony would begin, and knowing how these things tended to go, you knew you had plenty of time. You walked hand in hand with Jeonghan, and tried not to think about how this was the last time you would be able to as you settled into a pew. Soon after, Joshua sat down next to you, clearly dateless. He didn’t say anything, and aside from a nod of recognition, you didn’t say anything to him either, instead choosing to rest your head on Jeonghan’s shoulder.
Silence is comforting, whenever it’s done right. With you and Jeonghan, silence never felt awkward, it was just a frame of being with him. It was relaxed, you felt no need to fill the air with meaningless speak. Your silence was interrupted as Seungcheol ran up to Jeonghan.
“Han, we need your help. Wonwoo can’t find his cufflinks, he’s dropped them somewhere, and it is freaking Mingyu out, please come look.”
Jeonghan looked at you, but you smiled. “Go help them. I’ll be right here.” He hurriedly followed Seungcheol to Wonwoo’s dressing room, cursing him under his breath.
You were left alone with Joshua, and the silence suddenly felt suffocating. It didn’t seem to bother him, as he spoke quietly about the venue. “Isn’t it all so gorgeous? Minghao really did a great job pulling this off.”
You hummed, leaning over to point out the fairy lights strung along the ceiling. “See those? That was all me.”
“Ahh, I was wondering. They’re my favourite.”
You smiled, and Joshua turned to face you properly. “I’m sorry about what I said, Y/N. I didn’t mean to scare you. I think I was just jealous.”
Your eyes widened. You felt strangely off guard. “Jealous?”
“Yeah. I just broke things off with Heejin, and then having not dated anyone seriously in, I think ever, Jeonghan suddenly lands a great person like you.” He admitted shyly, squeezing your shoulder with his hand.
“I landed him, too.” You reminded him, but you could barely process what you were saying as you realised he hadn’t moved his hand.
“Of course. You two are good together.” He told you, and you smiled.
“We are.”
Day 22 (cont.)
The pop of a champagne bottle was one you couldn’t miss. As you entered the reception hall, your eyes gravitated towards the bar, and you pulled Jeonghan along with you.
“I can’t believe how many of our friends are married now.” You told Jeonghan as you waited for the bartender to return with your drinks (or water, in Jeonghan’s case. He was determined to stick to his word until the very end). “First Seungcheol, then Soonyoung - who even saw that one coming - then Jihoon and now Wonwoo.”
“We’re getting into that phase of our lives.” He shrugged. “Makes sense to me.”
“Yeah but what about you and me? We’ve never even properly dated.” You pouted. “What happens when they all leave us?”
“Then we’ll have each other.” He told you. “Have you already started drinking? The reception’s only just begun.”
You grinned sheepishly. “We got here late! Anyway, it’s been such a hellish few weeks! Let me have this.” The bartender approached you with a shot glass that you quickly downed, and you pulled Jeonghan to your assigned seats (next to each other, of course). You were greeted by the same table as the night before, and you waved to Seokmin and Jihoon who sat opposite you.
“Where’s Joshua?” You asked, and giggled when Seungkwan pointed towards the flailing figure on the dance floor.
“He’s already drunk and living his best life.”
“Good for him!”
At the mention of his name, Joshua stumbled over, grabbing your hands in an attempt to pull you to the dance floor with him. You looked over at Jeonghan, your boyfriend for only a few more hours, but he waved you off. “Go enjoy yourself.”
You grinned, letting Joshua lead you. Jeonghan smiled as he watched you, his chest tugging with a strange feeling.
“Why’d you let him take Y/N?” Jihoon asked. “You know he likes them.”
The tugging in his chest felt stronger, but Jeonghan ignored it. “As long as they’re having fun.”
It doesn’t matter anyway. They like him too.
Seokmin and Seungkwan eventually joined them, and Jihoon and his husband went dancing as well. Jeonghan instead placed his attention on his phone, flipping through all the stories of Wonwoo’s wedding venue he had been tagged in. There was one, posted by Soonyoung, that he couldn’t seem to tear his eyes from. You were in the corner, next to Jeonghan, and there was something so sweet about the way you stared at him. It was dangerous, convincing him of something that wasn’t real.
“Hey Jeongie.”
Jeonghan looked up to see Jiwon, sat in the seat that once belonged to you. She had that same cat like gaze that made him fall for her initially, but now he felt nothing. He really was bad at committing, he couldn’t even commit to finding Jiwon attractive.
“Hi Jiwon. What are you doing here?”
She cooed, running her hand up and down his arm, much to Jeonghan’s discomfort. He looked away, breaking the eye contact she was trying to keep.
“Did you leave me for Y/N?” She asked, tutting under her breath. “I remember everything you told me, how they’ve never really dated. They’re not partner material, Jeongie, I am.”
“I didn’t leave you for Y/N,” He began, a shiver trailing up his spine. “We ended it because I didn’t want to date you any more. Y/N came after that.”
Jiwon leaned close, her lips barely separate from Jeonghan’s ear, and he couldn’t lean any further back in his chair. “Maybe not for long. They don’t seem to like the way we’re talking.”
Jeonghan tore Jiwon’s hand from his arm, looking to the dance floor to see tears close to spilling out of your eyes. When you met his gaze, you ran away, not willing to let him see you like this. Why did it feel this way? Joshua glared at Jeonghan, and quickly followed you as you ran down the corridor.
“Jiwon just stop!” Jeonghan raised his voice, cringing at the volume (and the heads that turned towards the commotion). “It’s over, just leave me alone, please.”
He ignored her whimpered sobs as he got out of his seat and scrambled to find you, but the sounds of Jiwon crying made him feel awful. He didn’t exactly handle their relationship well, and he wasn’t handling what was left of yours well either.
As he ran to find you, his heard lurched when he heard your own voice muffled by cries.
“It’s s-so dumb…”
“Clearly he was just trying to make her jealous, Y/N.” What was Joshua telling you?
“He wasn’t doing that.”
“You don’t deserve someone who will use you.”
Jeonghan couldn’t deny the guilt those words caused on his poor heart. Sure, you knew what was happening, but he was still using you, wasn’t he? It was his idea to start this whole fake dating thing.
“I wouldn’t use you like that.”
“Josh…”
Just as he had caught up to the sound of your voice, Jeonghan caught a glimpse of you in Joshua’s embrace, with his lips on yours. And his aching heart shattered.
You pulled away from Joshua to see Jeonghan’s forlorn expression, a sight you don’t think you had ever seen before.
“Hannie, I promise, it’s not what it-“
“Looks like? What a cliche Y/N.” He scoffed, moving away from you.
“Hey man, I kissed them.” Joshua spoke, dropping a protective arm over you, one that weighed you down and you wriggled out of quickly. “Besides, serves you right for using Y/N to make Jiwon jealous.”
“You’re so fucking stupid Joshua.” Jeonghan spat. “They were using me to make you jealous, looks like it worked, huh?”
“No, Jeonghan, wait-“
“Deal’s off, Y/N. We’re no longer dating.”
And he ran. And no matter how fast you ran too, you knew you wouldn’t be able to catch up to him.
Day 23 - Sunday 25th November
You woke up on Wonwoo’s couch with a massive headache and chest pain, although you knew only one of those was due to your hangover. He and Eliza ended up taking you home, luckily they weren’t going on their honeymoon for another week. Wonwoo was rubbing your back as you vomited, and the worst pain was knowing that it would never be Jeonghan doing this role anymore.
“I still don’t get it.” He admitted. “Although most of these weeks have been a blur for me.”
“I’m not really supposed to tell you.” You told him, sipping the glass of water in your hands. “We made these rules.”
“Tell me anyway, because no matter what it is it’s not worth losing him forever.”
You sighed, and settled against the tiled floor. “It’s a long story.”
“It’s a Sunday. Quit stalling and tell me what happened.”
“Fine fine!” You gasped, shoving Wonwoo slightly. “So pushy.”
“You know how Jiwon wouldn’t leave Jeonghan alone?” Wonwoo nodded along with your story. “Well, we knew she would be at the wedding, and Jeonghan really wanted her to take the hint that he wasn’t interested, so we decided to date. Well, fake date. Just to get her off his back.”
“And you agreed to this?”
“I didn’t really want to? But…”
“You were in love with Joshua.” You stared at Wonwoo in shock. He smiled back at you. “You’re not as difficult to read as you like to think you are. Maybe the other idiots we call friends can’t see it, but it was fairly obvious to me.”
“But you didn’t realise Jeonghan and I weren’t actually together?”
“Just continue the story already.”
“Well yeah. Jeonghan convinced me we could make Joshua jealous, so I agreed. We said we wouldn’t tell anyone, and we would post about it online so everyone believed it was real, and then once Jiwon backed off at the wedding, we would call it off.” You recalled the story, rubbing your head as the pain settled and you felt like your skull was cracking open. “God do you have any painkillers?”
“I don’t really get hangovers.”
“You lucky bitch.”
“What happened at the reception, Y/N?”
You cringed at the flood of memories. Most of the time when you got drunk and made bad decisions, your brain saved you the embarrassment of remembering everything. This time, you couldn’t escape the images. Of Jiwon and Jeonghan, of the way Jeonghan looked at you, the way he ran away from you.
“Joshua and I were dancing, and when I looked back I saw Jiwon flirting with Jeonghan.” You gulped, feeling an all too familiar lump in your throat. “And I ran off.”
“Why’d you run?”
“I don’t know. And then Joshua kissed me, and I thought it would be perfect, but it felt wrong.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know! And then Jeonghan saw, and I don’t know why but he was so upset, and then he left. He left me, Wonwoo.”
“You really don’t know why he was upset?” Wonwoo questioned, and you met his gaze with a confused expression. “Even after all this time, Jeonghan can still surprise you, wow.”
“What do you know?”
“I know that just like you, Jeonghan is not as difficult to read as he thinks he is.” Wonwoo told you, stroking your hair. “Nine years ago, at 2:30 in the morning, I got a call from Jeonghan, who was so excited because he finally got the nerve to kiss you, and he went for it. And then the next day, nothing. And you two continued this dance around never going out, even when everyone could see how much you liked each other.”
“That’s not true, I don’t like Jeonghan.”
“Then why is Jiwon bothering you? Why did you even agree to this whole thing? There are easier ways to get close to Joshua that don’t involve pretending to date your best friend.”
“I…” For once, you didn’t have anything to say.
“You do know, Y/N. You have to stop acting so blind when it comes to Jeonghan. All the signs are there, you just don’t want to address them.”
He offered you his hand, pulling you up off of the bathroom floor. “Want to know why we all thought Jeonghan asked you out? It’s because we all knew he likes you. It’s actually pretty obvious.”
Day 24 - Monday 26th November
There was a knocking at your door. This wasn’t like Jeonghan’s courtesy knocks before he let himself into your house, this was a gentle knock that barely reverberated through the room.
You walked up to let Joshua into your house. He was shocked to see you like this - tear stricken cheeks, eyes and nose red and running.
“You look…”
“Shit, I know.” You finished for him. “What do you want, Joshua?”
“I wanted to apologise.” He looked over your shoulder expectantly.
“Fine, come in, but you can’t come any further than the entryway. I just don’t want everyone to be spectators of this.”
Joshua followed you in, shuffling awkwardly. He acted as if he had never been in your apartment before. You weren’t entirely sure he had been. You let him shut the door gently behind him, and you leaned against the wall, blocking him from moving any closer in.
“I shouldn’t have kissed you while you were dating Jeonghan. I’m sorry.”
You clicked your tongue, not moving position. “Yeah, that was messed up. You’re Jeonghan’s friend. You’re my friend. I felt like you were just fighting over me to compete with him.”
“Y/N, that’s not true.” He reached his hand out to caress your arm, but you pulled it back.
“What’s even been going on with you?” You asked. “I’ve barely seen you since your breakup, none of us have, and you were a total dick the whole time Jeonghan and I were dating.”
Joshua scoffed, and you gasped at his attitude. “Yeah well you guys weren’t actually together though, right?”
“That doesn’t matter.”
“Yes it does!” He raised his voice as he began to yell. “Why are you upset? It’s not like you were cheating or anything, it wasn’t real.”
“Are you kidding? You didn’t know we weren’t actually together! What’s your excuse?”
“My excuse is that according to Jeonghan, the only reason you were even pretending to date was to make me jealous, and now you’re upset that it worked? I’m jealous. I’m jealous that Jeonghan got to go out with you and play the part of boyfriend, even if it was fake.”
“That’s not the reason.”
“Oh, so you didn’t want to make me jealous?”
He was staring at you with an intensity you hadn’t seen since law school, and it reminded you of the Joshua you once knew. The Joshua you fell for. And as you met his gaze, you realised all your feelings for him were gone. Every desire for him to fall for you like you had fallen for him had dissipated, because you weren’t sure you had ever fallen for him. You loved his drive, maybe that was all you loved.
“I did.”
“So what changed?”
“What do you think, Josh?”
He scoffed, dropping his gaze to the floor. “Of course. Of course I can’t beat him.”
“Joshua…”
“No, just,” He sighed, shuffling away from you. “Why do you always choose him?”
“I don’t, but I’m choosing him now.” You told him, And you were. After twenty two days with Jeonghan, Joshua didn’t feel as important to you anymore.
Joshua turned to leave your apartment. “Josh.” He looked at you, and you met his gaze for the last time. “You should have kissed me all the years I was pining after you, not once I wasn’t an option anymore. Maybe it would have been different.”
He left without another word, and your door shut so gently as he left.
Day 25 - Tuesday 27th November
You hadn’t been blocked. You could still see the messages, you knew he was reading them, he just wouldn’t respond. He wasn’t picking up either.
“Cmon Jeonghan…” You whispered under your breath. “Please just pick up.”
“Hey, this is Jeonghan. I can’t come to the phone right now…”
You groaned at the now too familiar sound of his voicemail. Was he ever going to talk to you again?
Okay, it was kind of your fault. Had it been anyone else, this would have felt so obvious, but you were so oblivious when it came to Jeonghan, and now here you were, pining for your best friend, hoping he would finally return.
“Hey Han,” You started talking, but you had no idea what to say. The only thoughts running through your mind were please just come back to me, but you weren’t sure how to say that without bursting into tears. “I, uh, I really want to talk to you, please. I miss you.”
You hung up, only to find your fingers reaching for the contact once more.
“Hey, this is Jeonghan. I can’t come to the phone right now…”
“Hi again. I want you to know that, umm, I spoke to Wonwoo. He called me an idiot, basically.” You chuckled as you recounted that morning, although you knew Jeonghan probably wouldn’t be laughing as he listened. If he listened. If you two weren’t… wherever this had led you, you know he would probably laugh at that, but he wasn’t here anymore. “I didn’t know. I should have known, but I didn’t, and I just really want to talk to you. Please.”
“Hey, this is Jeonghan. I can’t come to the phone right now…”
“Hey, um, I didn’t like the kiss. The one with Joshua. I think I did kiss him back? But I didn’t like it. I would choose our posed cafe kiss so much sooner than the one he gave me. I don’t even want it. Please talk to me.”
“Hey, this is Jeonghan. I can’t come to the phone right now…”
“It was so stupid of me to be jealous of Jiwon. I know you don’t like her, I just, I was so drunk and stressed out, I freaked out. It was so so stupid, and I’m sorry, but I hope you know that it was jealousy because I wanted to be in her place. God, this is so embarrassing.”
“Hey, this is Jeonghan. I can’t come to the phone right now…”
“I don’t think I like Joshua? I know, drastic turn. I think I just looked up to him, growing up. He’s always been so out of reach and ahead of everyone else, I think I mistook it for love when it wasn’t. I don’t love him.”
“Hey, this is Jeonghan. I can’t come to the phone right now…”
“I know I fucked up. Well, Joshua fucked up most of all, but I shouldn’t have run off like that. But you ran too. You didn’t let me explain. And last week, you disappeared. I know you said you were busy but it felt like you were running from me? And I fucked up because I ran, so you’re no better than me.”
“Hey, this is Jeonghan. I can’t come to the phone right now…”
“Please ignore what I just said. I’m not upset with you. Well, actually, I am. I think I’m mostly upset with myself? Or mostly upset with Joshua? But I’m still a little upset with you. Please can we just talk?”
“Hey, this is Jeonghan. I can’t come to the phone right now…”
“I’ll leave you alone after this one, I promise. I just… I miss you. And I think I need an explanation, because I’ve been clueless about this for way too long.”
“Hey, this is Jeonghan. I can’t come to the phone right now…”
“I love you. In every sense of the word.”
Day 26 - Wednesday 28th November
You felt so strange in front of Jeonghan’s door. Although he spent so much time with you in your house, very rarely would you visit him in his. You and him would always blame his roommate, but truthfully you knew it wasn’t that. Even though Vernon wasn’t the tidiest or most respectful of privacy, you were happy when he was around. No, Jeonghan’s house was a barrier between the two of you, a final wall he had placed to protect himself. And now you were destroying the that sanctity.
You almost felt bad, but you were so desperate for him to talk to you again. Sure, the two of you had arguments, but nothing like this, and you weren’t sure that without drastic measures, you would ever even see Jeonghan again. So here you were, your knuckles rapt against Jeonghan’s door, waiting to see him.
The door swung open, but Jeonghan wasn’t there. Instead stood Vernon, who looked like he had only rolled out of bed at the sound of your knocking. Honestly, had it been true, it wouldn’t have surprised you, despite it being 8:30 in the evening. You had no idea what this boy’s schedule was, if he even followed a set one.
“Oh, hey Vernon.”
“Hey Y/N.’
You shuffled on your feet. You and Vernon were friends - you practically grew up together, why did this feel so awkward?
“Cool party, by the way.” He cocked his head in confusion. “Sofia’s party! Two weeks ago, I know you helped her set it up. It was fun, from what I remember, Jeonghan dragged me along to it and I got very drunk very quickly.” Okay, you were rambling now. That helped. “Speaking of, is he here?”
“He?”
“Jeonghan? Is he home?”
“Nah, he’s um..” Vernon trailed off, and you cringed. Clearly he had told Vernon to ward you away. “He’s staying back late at work. Do you, do you want me to tell him you were here?”
You sighed, feeling your shoulders slump. “Don’t bother. Have a good evening, Hansol.”
“See you around Y/N.”
Vernon let the door shut in front of him, He hated lying, and unlike his roommate, he was absolutely terrible at it.
“If Y/N comes, just tell her I’m out.”
Jeonghan wouldn’t talk to Vernon. He barely spoke to Seungcheol, who was dropping by every night to check up on his friend. He hadn’t seen him for more than a few minutes every day as he left for work and stumbled back home afterwards. All Vernon could hope for was that you solved your issues with him soon. A grumpy Jeonghan was a nightmare, a heartbroken Jeonghan was a ghost.
Day 27 - Thursday 29th November
Eunwoo’s office had been mostly empty for a few days now, but today he picked up the last two boxes to take to his new office, a floor above. Instead of seeing his smug face across from your office door, all you saw was a clean desk, no files or loose papers across the surface like there had been before. It felt like a cruel reminder of what you were so close to gaining. Partnership. Jeonghan. You couldn’t tell which was making you more depressed currently.
You barely noticed when Eunchae walked up to your office, knocking gently against your open door. “You alright, Y/N?”
“Hmm? Yeah I’m fine Eunchae. Can I help you with anything?” You spoke, not lifting your head to meet her gaze. You didn’t want her to see the bags that had formed under your puffy eyes. It’s hard to fall asleep these days.
“I just wanted to say you should have been the next junior partner, not Eunwoo.” She barely whispered, and you understood why. The office behind her was practically haunted by Eunwoo’s cheery spirit. “He’s a good lawyer, but he barely pays attention to us and the newer lawyers. You take good care of us.”
You smiled at her words. “Thanks Eunchae.”
She walked in, letting the door close behind her. You had given up all pretence of following the dumb rules like commandments, and Eunchae caught on quick. “That’s why you’ve been so sad this week, right?”
“That’s.. half of it. How have you noticed?”
She shrugged. “I’m smarter than they are. What’s the other half?”
“Boy troubles, I guess.”
She leaned in. “Is this about your boyfriend? The one you posted on insta?” You nodded, and she smiled, pleased with her detective skills. “What happened?”
“He didn’t tell me he liked me until too late, and now I’m realising that I like him too, but he won’t talk to me.”
“I’m sorry, why doesn’t your boyfriend already know you like him?”
“It’s a long story.”
“Okay..” She trailed off. “Have you told him how you really feel?”
“Yeah, but he won’t talk to me anyway.”
“Tell him again.” She advised. “People are stupid, they don’t believe what’s right in front of him. What have you got to lose, anyway?”
Day 27 (cont.)
“Hey, this is Jeonghan. I can’t come to the phone right now…”
“I don’t want to fill your inbox, so I swear, if you don’t respond to this, I’ll leave you alone forever. But god I’m going to miss you if you leave. You’re such a heartbreaker, Hannie, you’re about to break mine. I’m in love with you. I’m sorry it took me so long to see it. Please just, let me know if you feel the same, or if everyone was wrong. I guess if I don’t hear from you again I’ve gotten my answer. I.. Goodnight, Jeonghan.”
Day 28 - Friday 30th November
You hadn’t heard anything from Jeonghan. All night, you stayed up, staring at your phone, hoping it would light up with a call, a text, anything. God, you would even settle for a subtweet, but nothing. When 5AM hit and the light of dawn peered in through your blinds you had given up. Jeonghan wanted nothing to do with you.
You called in sick to work. It wasn’t difficult, crying will make you sound all stuffy and blocked. You hoped the sniffles that slipped from your lips weren’t understood as what they truly were: forming scars. Whatever, it gave you an excuse to stay in bed all day.
You kept your promise, not to bother Jeonghan again, but couldn’t find it in yourself to delete conversations or photos. Your heart was shattered, and the pieces were lost deep in the text messages he sent, you couldn’t delete them so easily.
You made one phone call, to Wonwoo, when you woke again at 5PM.
“He hates me, Woo. I think I lost him forever.”
“If that’s really the case then he’s an idiot. Just like you.”
You felt no desire to reach out to anyone else, or let anyone know you were alive. You didn’t feel alive. All you wanted was to sink into your mattress and hide from the world. The blankets covering your face would have to do in the meantime. It was a weak shield, but you were hidden all the same, and that’s all you needed.
Someone came to check on you earlier, or perhaps it was just your neighbour. You heard the knocks, but pretended no one was home. They left quickly. You felt so forgettable, so discarded. What a pathetic existence.
9:21 PM flashed across your phone screen, but you didn’t seem to notice it. It was silenced on your kitchen counter, far away from you, because you knew if you kept it nearby you would do something stupid. And you were careful. You needed to be even more careful than before, now that you were nursing a broken heart.
When the knocks on your door sounded you hid even further away. They would go away, they all did. And the knocks did subside, replaced instead by the clink of keys. Fuck, was it your landlord? What was he doing here? The door opened, and you pulled the sheets tight over your head. Hopefully he would just leave.
You heard footsteps slowly lead to your room. Fuck, was this a home invasion? Maybe you should be more scared, but you couldn’t find it in you to do anything but stay in a frozen position. Your bedroom door creaked open, and you felt your heartbeat in your eyes.
This was it. You were going to die, and you couldn’t even see Jeonghan one last time before some stranger took you out in your own home. Well, the apartment you had rented for years. God, you were almost thirty, and you were about to die alone in a starter apartment you never bothered to leave. Why was this world so cruel?
“Y/N.”
Fuck. It wasn’t your landlord. It was Jeonghan. Somehow, when being confronted with the person you’ve been trying to reach for days, your confidence disappears.
“I know you’re not sleeping, Y/N.”
Maybe if you didn’t respond he would go away? Did you even want him to? Why weren’t you doing anything?
“I saw you left your phone in the kitchen. You’ve got a voicemail, by the way. It’s from an hour ago. I’m gonna play it for you, okay?”
“Hey Y/N. It’s me, obviously. I um, you’re right. I shouldn’t have run away. I was being a coward. I’ve been a coward the entire time we’ve been friends, because I don’t know when, but at some point I feel so hopelessly in love with you and I’ve been hiding it this entire time. Fuck, I really need to see you. Can I come over?”
Your protective sheets were pulled from your head, and you were met with the sight of Jeonghan, who’s eyes were as puffy as your own. He smiled down at you.
“You look like shit.”
“So do you.”
“Yeah, well, I was heartbroken.” Jeonghan grinned as he spoke. God, he was so beautiful. “I thought my best friend who I’ve loved for years didn’t love me back.”
You sat up, reaching for Jeonghan’s hand, which he gladly gave you. “Why didn’t you ever tell me before now?”
“Had to protect my fragile heart.” He told you, locking into your eyes. You were frozen in place once more. You had never once thought of Jeonghan as fragile, yet here he was, baring his soul to you, like a glass canary had been placed in your hands. “I was so content to just hide it all my life, watch as you fall deeper in love with Joshua, and then I discovered I really loved being your fake boyfriend. I never thought I would enjoy being a boyfriend, but something about being with you makes it so easy.”
All the walls you swore you would put up had been torn down by Jeonghan before you could even begin construction.
“Besides, what exactly was I supposed to think when you hated our first kiss?”
You gasped. “I didn’t hate it! We both agreed it felt weird the next morning.”
“Sure, I definitely thought that, and wasn’t just agreeing with you to save myself the embarrassment of rejection.”
You cringed as you thought of that fateful day. “I don’t know Hannie, when I woke up that morning things felt as if they had changed, and it scared me.” You blushed, feeling regretful of your naivety. “I was so scared of things changing for the worse I never considered that they could get better.”
Jeonghan’s hand met your jaw, pulling you towards him with such a sense of nostalgia. “What about now? Are you still scared?”
“A little.” You whispered. You didn’t need to say it any louder, you knew he could hear you. “But I don’t want my fears to hold me back any more.”
“Oh yeah? Show me.”
You rolled your eyes at Jeonghan, before doing exactly that, and capturing his lips with your own. No fireworks, no eruptions. Kissing him was the comfort you had craved for years. Jeonghan was your home.
You pulled away from him, letting your eyes flutter open. “That count as proof?”
He hummed. “I don’t know, why don’t you show me again?”
“You’re such a loser, Yoon.” You teased, but did exactly as he wanted.
Day 1 (of forever to come) - Saturday 1st December
This past month had no shortage of you waking with Jeonghan in your apartment, but this was the first time you had woken up beside him, arms tangled together. Your phone was buzzing incessantly under your pillow, and who thought it was a good idea to interrupt your sleep so early in the morning?
Oh, Wonwoo. You should probably give him peace of mind, after everything he’s done for you.
“Hello?” You spoke groggily, trying as best as you could to whisper so as to not wake Jeonghan, still asleep next to you.
“Y/N? Have you seen Jeonghan recently? I know you guys are fighting, but Vernon told me he left last night without saying anything and he’s still not back yet, it’s already 10.”
“Wow, Vernon’s up early on a Saturday. I’m not even out of bed yet.”
Wonwoo hissed through your speakers. “Take this seriously! Your best friend is missing!”
Jeonghan stirred, and before you could say anything, he spoke instead. “Y/N, tell your friend to hush, I’m trying to sleep.”
You stayed silent, and Wonwoo was silenced too.
“Is that…”
“Yeah, he’s here with me. He’s not missing, you can tell Vernon he’s alright.”
“Holy shit! He’s in bed with you?”
“He stayed the night…”
“Get it.”
“Shut up Wonwoo.”
Jeonghan reached his hand over to you. “Lemme talk to him.” You obliged, handing the phone to him.
“Hey Wonwoo, no nothing happened. Well, Y/N confessed their undying feelings for me and told me how incredibly attractive and sexy I am and how I’ve ruined anyone else’s love-“
“JEONGHAN!”
“Yep gotta go, bye Wonwoo!”
You snatched the phone from Jeonghan, only to see the call had already ended. “You snake! Stop badmouthing me to our friends!”
He gasped in mock offense. “Bad mouthing? Never! That’s basically what happened last night, anyway.”
“You’re missing the part where you confessed first.” You reminded him, pushing against his arm, but he resisted your force, instead wrapping his arms around you and holding you as you squirmed. “Let go of me you weasel.”
“Weasel? Are you gonna pay for the damages you’re causing my heart?” He pouted, and you wanted to badly to shove (kiss…) that pout off his face.
“More like ego.”
“Wonwoo has always known how incredibly whipped I am for you, he doesn’t need a reminder.” Jeonghan whispered above you. “Do you?”
You nodded slyly. “You’ve got a decade of reminders to make up for hiding this from me for so long. You better get cracking.”
Jeonghan leaned over to kiss your forehead. “Why rush it? We’ve got the rest of our lives, and I’m going to make sure you never forget just how much I love you.”
AN: i think this is the first time i’ve ever written a happy ending but goddamn i love this fic
+ read the university kiss scene here!!
#caratwritersclub#seventeen fic#jeonghan fic#fake dating au#seventeen fake dating#svt fluff#svt scenario#jeonghan scenario#svt angst#seventeen angst#jeonghan angst#seventeen friends to lovers#yoon jeonghan#joshua#joshua x reader#jeonghan x reader#jeonghan x you
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𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐞
nonidol!chenle x fem!reader
premise. you and chenle fell hard and fast. but chenle's been hiding something from you, and he'll try his damnedest to keep it that way. but no matter how hard he may try, the truth always finds a way to be revealed. and that just may cost him everything.
genre. not exactly slow burn, fluff, angst!!, s2l, arranged marriage au later, college basketball star!chenle, richkid!chenle problems, college au, theaterkid!reader
warnings. ANGST, fluff, low-key cheating-ish?, chenle embodies down bad, reader tries and fails to resist, flirting and innuendos asf (it's chenle, cmon), kissing+making out (like one scene), cursing/swearing, chenle is kinda smooth asf, did I say ANGST yet?, angst, panic
word count. 24.2k (heh)
permanent taglist: @tayunji @im-a-big-mess @justanotherkpopstanlol @johlee @frickyratz @liamsholygrail @staysstrays @w3bqrl @y3jiishot
taglist: @j4eminie777 @jenosbliss @hibernatinghamster @user103843 @watermelonlee05
a/n: i speedran this fic and i am in shambles. i hope u all enjoy tho! pls pls pLs help a girl out and reblog, comment, or even send asks abt the fic! pls spread the word if u do enjoy reading this. it would mean the world to me <3
also huge thank you to @tayunji for being my sanity check and letting me live word count dump on her (and for always sending kind words, even if she angst cancels me 🤡)
You remembered the exact day you met Zhong Chenle.
It had been a long day. Actually, "long day" was an understatement. You'd been working at the café since opening until now, which was 4:32 in the afternoon, and for what reason? Absolutely none, other than the fact that you were dirt poor, and only the glimmer of false hope called overtime could grant you any reprieve. Ironically, you had little to no breaks today.
Funny, right? Always funny.
But it made for a sour mood as you took orders from people. You honestly tried your best to be nice and energetic and "happy to take your order!", even if that meant they wanted five more pumps of raspberry syrup, a dash of caramel sauce, and an extra pinch of turmeric. Turmeric, seriously?
You were just trading off places with one of your coworkers to take the register again when you heard the bell above the door jingle. Swiftly tightening the ponytail on your head, you adjusted the pencil seated in the little divot behind your ear. Your mouth widened in the perfect service smile, ready to spew out the same bullshit you always did.
The young man who sauntered through the door—yes, he sauntered—was lowering the Ray Bans from his eyes and hanging the leg from the collar of his black and white Balenciaga shirt. He had dark hair, the strands slightly wavy and curly atop his head; he reminded you of Ryan Gosling. At least, somewhat like Ryan Gosling.
But then that gut wrenching feeling came to you. Oh no, you knew exactly who this chad was.
And you saw the way his dark eyes looked you up and down, the same glimmer of recognition in them. You watched in slow motion as he approached the counter with a smirk curling at his lips, and you braced for goddamn impact.
Zhong Chenle smiled at you. "Hey."
If you hadn't known who Zhong Chenle was, then you would have been living under a rock—he was the boy who had everything. Basketball star, trust fund baby, academic genius—he was criminally famous around campus for not only being an all-rounder, but a total ladies' man. You were not oblivious to the rumors that circulated about him, but you had also never heard any solid evidence that he was dating anyone. He was an effortless flirt, and you had a feeling you might find out just how effortless he was.
Your smile tightened just slightly. Keep it up, Yn, he might tip well. And you need this new set of microphones for the stage crew. "Hi, what can I get started for you?"
"A tall, black coffee, please."
Easy enough. Your tense shoulders loosened as you reached up and took the pencil from your ear, the thin wooden stick twirling between your fingers mindlessly before the eraser came down on the screen to input the order into the system. "Cash or card?"
"Card."
And then you watched as he whipped out a slick, black credit card like it was the prophetic playing card you had pulled from his deck in a magic trick. You raised a brow, unimpressed, as he handed it over to you across the café counter for you to insert into the credit card reader. A black card for a four dollar cup of coffee?
Your friend Felix would be hounding for a good tip by now. You could imagine the dollar signs lighting up in his eyes.
"So uh, are you doing anything after your shift?" Chenle suddenly asked, leaning against the counter with one hip as he took back the card and tucked it into the inside pocket of his leather jacket. He brushed the dark hair from his forehead, glancing at you with cool nonchalance.
You were close to telling him that this was just a McDonald's drive-thru. Maybe if you weren't so tired from today's shift, you would have given him the reaction he wanted: shy giggling, tucking your hair behind your ear, smiling through soft blushes. It was the reaction he would probably expect. Instead, you could only give him a half-hearted smirk. "Probably take a nap."
"You could take a nap with me."
"Uh-huh." You finished off inputting his order into the system with the end of your pencil. You spun the pencil between your fingers, tucking it behind your ear once more, the feeling comfortable and familiar. Unlike the weight of his stare. You pretended you didn't see how Chenle's eyes bursted into hearts while he watched you do that particular move again. "Could I get you anything else?"
"Yeah, actually." He feigned confusion as he patted down his jacket and pants pockets. "I think I lost my number. Could I borrow yours?"
The feminine urge to—
"Ynie, what's taking so—oh hey, Chenle!" Thank the Lord for Felix Lee. The blondie appeared at your side, hand planted on your shoulder, as he greeted his friend with a bright smile. "Dark coffee again?"
Chenle nodded. "Yep. I was just introducing myself to your pretty friend over here." He winked at you, and you realized just how much confidence he must have had if he could wink at you in front of Felix.
Felix's head whipped over to you, eyes comically wide, and you sent him an earnest "don't you fucking dare, Lee Yongbok!" look, but alas… the man never did listen to you, did he? Felix smiled, slow and mischievous. "Oh? Well, I'm sure Yn would love to keep introducing herself to you while I go get your coffee ready, huh, Ynie?"
"Don't you 'Yn-ie' me, mister," you practically hissed. The cheeky bastard just threw you to the wolves!
Your friend patted you on the back and left soon after, swiftly stealing a cup from your side as he went. It was too late to haul him back without making a scene.
"He's gonna expect you to tip him for this, y'know?" You joked as a sorry attempt to make conversation. Or not be left in awkward silence. But you had an idea that Chenle was gifted at avoiding awkward silences.
Chenle bit his lip to suppress a smile. "Yeah, but I'd much rather tip you instead." The most magical thing he could have possibly done? He glanced around as if this were an illegal drug deal, and in a way this was, but he pulled a black, leather bifold from his jacket pocket and began counting out bills.
You slapped a hand over your mouth. "That," you said slowly before you could stop yourself, "is probably the sexiest thing you've done since you walked in here."
Aaaaaand there you go, Yn. Genius. Fantastic. If I could slap myself—
The man's eyebrows shot up and his hands stopped flicking through the bills. A grin crawled onto his sculpted face once more. "Ah, so you think I'm sexy? I knew you'd come around."
There was no doubt about it—your face was on fire. "No, that isn't what I said. I said that your action was sexy; not necessarily you."
But the damage had been done. You had inadvertently inflated Zhong Chenle's ego even more than it already was blown up to.
"That's cute," he said and folded a handful of bills in half. He gestured for you to stick your hand out, and he grabbed your wrist, placing the bills into your palm and curling your fingers around them.
After you had slipped the bills into the pocket of your waist apron, you saw Chenle lick his lips; there was a worrying sparkle in his eyes. "Hey, if you put your number on the cup, I'll give you more."
Your eyes nearly bulged out of your head. How much money did this man have? "Dude, I think you've given me enough. I'm close to giving you this wad of cash back."
He shrugged. "Then your number, and a date and time."
"Date and time?"
He sighed, hand draping over his forehead. Chenle shook his head and clicked his tongue. "Tsk tsk, for such a pretty face, you sure—"
You glowered. "Finish that sentence, Zhong. I dare you."
Chenle let out a sharp laugh, but he raised his hands in surrender. "Okay, sure, baby. Whatever you want." He chuckled under his breath. "Damn, you're hot when you're feisty. I should rile you up more."
"Your presence is enough to do that."
"Ah, so I'm enough for you? I'd use the word perfect, but we can work on that." He opened his mouth, no doubt to say something to make you even more flustered, but Felix's squawk of distress pierced through the café's lo-fi music.
"Uhhhh, Yn? A little help, heh."
You pursed your lips. "Duty calls."
Chenle nodded in understanding. "'Course. Remember, Yn: number, date, and time." The image of his smirk was ingrained in your brain as you abandoned the counter to see whatever Felix had done to mess up his coffee. And you would end up scrawling all three of those things onto the side of Chenle's cup. For what reason? None at all, except for you trying to convince yourself it was because he practically paid you to do it, and not because you were the slightest bit interested.
���𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐈𝐈—
It scared you, how quickly you and Chenle had fallen into a routine. After your first meeting at the café, you both had planned out an outing together—dinner and a movie. Simple, right?
Yeah. Except, dinner and a movie was in his penthouse with a private chef flown in from his home province of Shanghai, and the movie wasn't even out in theaters yet. Yeah, you tried to explain it to Felix the next day, but there were little to no words to describe everything you had experienced that night. The luxury, the awe—the guilt.
God, you couldn't stomach seeing yourself sometimes. Especially whenever he popped into the café calling you babe, slapping too much money on the counter for just a cup of plain old coffee, and hanging out on a stool to keep you company for the rest of your shift. Sometimes you had something planned at the theater that you had to go run and manage, but whether it was that or going straight home, Chenle was offering you a ride there.
You would be walking on campus and see him pass by with his group of wild friends. He would wink at you, blow you a kiss, shout your name; anything to get your attention. And it definitely caught people's attention.
You didn't have a shift at the café today, but you had been holed up in the backstage office all afternoon. The theater society at the university was going to be thrust into chaotic, hellish Tech Week, the week right before opening night of their most recent play, The Lucky Ones. It was actually a student-written and student-directed play, and you were so excited to see the finished product on opening night. You had already sent out advanced tickets to your friends and family, spread word to your theater friends at other schools, and most of all totally found a date.
It wasn't like Huang Renjun, the director, was forcing you to bring a date. It was just that you had never brought a date before. You never needed one. You always chose to enjoy the play on your own, or in the company of your closest friends, but with recent events? You had an idea.
A confident knock on the door broke you from your stupor, and you told them they could come in.
Speak of the Devil…
Chenle poked his head into the room, eyes already roaming about the small office space with curious eyes. He allowed himself in, easily finding a seat in the chair across from you. "Hi Yn-ie. Renjun said I could find you in here."
"Oh, right," you clicked your pen closed and tucked it behind your ear, "sorry, I forget how time passes when I'm alone in here. Did you call or text? I always keep my phone off." You dug around your desk drawer before finding the device deep in the mess of paper clips, random SD cards, bookmark stickies, and the like. It was like the aftermath of an explosion at an office supply store.
"Alone? You could always call me to come hang out; keep you company," he said, ignoring your previous statement. He twisted in his seat, draping his legs over the arm of the chair and resting sideways in it. "Unless this is your private space. Then I won't intrude."
You found yourself smiling. "Ah, no. Having someone in here will probably ground me to reality, actually."
"I do need something though."
You perked up. "Sure."
He grinned. "Don't sound too eager now."
"Zhong," you rolled your eyes.
"Okay, okay! God, you're kind of sexy when you're like that. Anyways!" He said loudly to prevent you from making yet another remark. He giggled. "You're cute. But yeah, I have court side tickets to our opening game of the season this Friday, and I would absolutely love to see your pretty face in the stands."
He added cheekily, "Screaming my name, of course."
Oh god. How did you not expect that? You sighed. "Yes, of course."
Chenle propped his chin in the palm of his hand, head tilted sideways as he looked at you. "That's a yes to the tickets and wearing my jersey then."
"Yes—wait, what?"
He clapped his hands together loudly. "Next topic! A little birdie also told me that baby needs a date for a certain opening night next week." He flipped his imaginary, long hair over his shoulder. "Just let me know when and what color your dress is."
You crossed your arms over your chest and you were scared at how fast it was pounding. "Bold of you to assume that I don't already have a date."
For a second, you swore you saw his confident facade falter. But it must have just been a glitch in the matrix, because there was no way, right? "Okay, and? I'm better."
"Uh huh," you hummed, unimpressed. "I'll need a better reason than that to ditch my prior commitment," you teased.
You knew he had caught on, tongue poking the inside of his cheek, corners of his mouth lifting. "Ah, I see. I don't think I'll buy myself into this one, will I? Well, what if I told you I'm an excellent play watcher? Probably the most well behaved person you'll find in the seats—"
You covered your laugh with a cough. "Chenle, you couldn't sit through one two-hour long movie. This play is at least three."
Chenle pouted, wrinkling his nose at you. "Why are you making this so difficult for me, Ynie? I just wanna return the favor, support your play, support your art!"
"Okay, okay, you big baby," you caved. "I'll let you know when I pick out a dress." But inwardly you were grateful. God, you were so grateful. There were so many rumors about this man, but he had yet to disappoint you. And even if you were nervous, you knew the butterflies in your stomach were from the things he was making you feel.
If he was as the rumors said he was, then why would he put so much effort into impressing you? Or, as he said himself, supporting you and your craft?
Chenle lifted his head, mouth falling open slightly. "You mean you haven't picked out a dress yet?"
"No, you are not buying me a dress or watching me choose a dress."
"You're literally no fun."
—𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐈𝐈𝐈—
Karina, your roommate, was skeptical. You had to admit, however, that she had every right to be, given her last relationships and the fact that she knew every drop of gossip that landed at SMU's front door. She was fully immersed in campus news, especially since she ran the university's magazine and yearbook committees. So Zhong Chenle was a subject she heard about often, but she never thought she'd have to hear about him at home from you, too.
"Just think about it, 'kay? Don't make any hard decisions yet."
You waved him off, this being the seventh time since the theater that he was bugging you about the dress. Jesus, it was like this man was eager to waste his money somewhere. You already felt terrible as it was. "Chenle, I will. But absolutely no promises."
He gestured with his hand, his back leaning against the wall in the hallway right across from your door. "Sure, fine. Whatever you say."
"Zhong Chenle, you are not getting your way this time."
He smiled, like he knew that was a lie.
You shooed him off after that. Your pride needed a bit of restoration, as well as some reassurance that you would not let this man completely take down your defenses.
When you let yourself into the apartment, locking the door behind you, Karina was already on the couch with her laptop on her knees and the coffee table swarmed with spread upon spread. "Was that Chenle again?" She asked as you set your things down on the kitchen table noisily.
"Yeah," you said back. "Just came from the theater."
"He came by to see you?"
You threw open the fridge in search of a beverage. "Mhm. Asked me to go to his game on Friday. Court side tickets or whatever."
Karina nearly rocketed up from her seat. "Court—court side tickets?"
Your back was turned, so you hadn't seen her very physical reaction. You continued to scour the depths of the fridge before you settled on a can of iced tea. "Yeah." When you faced her, sipping on your tea, you lifted a brow in silent question at her widened eyes and now disturbed position.
Your roommate set her laptop aside so she could lean against the back of the couch. "Yn, sweetie, he asked you to sit court side. Did he happen to ask you to wear his jersey?"
At this, you snorted. "Pretty much told me to."
Karina puffed out her cheeks, and you recognized this particular quirk as something she did when she was trying not to spontaneously combust on the spot. "He's literally staking his claim on you. Like… ever read those Wattpad books where the guy is possessive and makes the girl wear his jacket or jersey or whatever?"
"You have?"
"That's not the point!" She stammered. "But that's what's happening right now, Yn! The basketball players hardly ever bring someone to sit court side, unless they're family or close friends. Honestly, I think only two or three players are thought to be bringing their significant others to the game this week."
You screwed the lid back onto your tea bottle and settled on the couch beside Karina. "Why is it such a big deal?" You could probably answer that question yourself, to be honest.
Karina still answered nonetheless, "Because Chenle's single. Well, until he met you. Have you guys talked about a label yet? I don't mean to pry or push."
Actually? No, you had no label for whatever was happening with Chenle. "No, you're good. But no, we haven't talked about it, but to be honest, there hasn't been a need for it. We went on, like, one official date and then had a couple of hangouts afterward. We're like… friends right now."
That was generously put. He was practically your—no, don't say it. Maybe you should have a conversation about your boundaries.
"Okay well, does he feel the same way? I don't even know, Yn-ie, but I feel like I should warn you to be careful."
That was reasonable. You could understand where Karina was coming from, and you really shouldn't be falling so quickly into this thing with him until you knew his intentions. You didn't want to be just temporary to someone. If you were going to put your all into a relationship, it should be for real, right?
Karina sighed, bracing her elbow against the back of the couch and looking at you with her head tilted to the side. "I don't want to dishearten you. You like him, don't you?"
Your eyes widened. "L-like him? Maybe as like a companion, but not—not like that! Pfft." Yeah, no. You liked him, or at least, you were beginning to like him. But this could just be an infatuation, you thought. Feelings were fickle things, and you wanted to get this right.
Karina deadpanned at you. With an exasperated shake of her head, she shifted to pick her laptop back up. "Sometimes I worry about you."
"Hey!" You squawked. "It's too early to determine that."
Her hum was disbelieving. "Yeah, sure. So how many tickets did Chenle give you? Just one? It'd be kinda cool to sit court side for once."
You shrugged. "Actually, no idea. But I don't really wanna be sitting there by myself. I haven't been to a basketball game in a while, so it'd be nice to bring a friend or two."
"Shoot him a text?"
You were already pulling your phone out of your pocket, thumbs flying over the keyboard.
you: quick question
His reply was instantaneous.
zhong: yes i can pick u up to go dress shopping
You rolled your eyes. He really was not going to give this up.
you: no not abt the dress
you: i was wondering if my friends could come w me to the game?
zhong: yeah ofc! lmk how many and i'll send the tix
"He just asked how many," you told Karina, who's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "I'll just say you and Felix. I don't think I'd want to burden him with getting a hold of so many tickets."
As you typed out your response to Chenle, Karina voiced her agreement. "Yeah, that sounds good. Tell him thanks for me."
you: two + me pls
you: and karina says ty
you: ty again for doing this, u really didn't have to :(
zhong: i did it cuz i wanted to bby, so no need for all that
zhong: i'll get the tix and my jersey to u by tmr ;)
—𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐈𝐕—
The jersey was red with bold, white letters on the back spelling out ZHONG, and the number 30. It was made of really nice, breathable quality, and was definitely the product of the administration's budget toward the school basketball team. You knew this from Karina's constant research and digging and interviewing with her organizations, and it didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that the basketball team was good enough to get so much funding. Chenle, you knew, was one of the best. Even if he wasn't captain, he was still talented.
You had been sitting on the edge of your bed with the jersey in your lap for the past ten minutes, trying to sike yourself out of whatever funk you were in. It was just a shirt, right? It didn't mean anything. (Except, it totally did. A shirt with Chenle's name and number on the back was a statement.)
There was a knock on your apartment door, and Karina yelled that she would get it. You were still considering the jersey.
Felix's blond head appeared in your bedroom doorway, eyebrows furrowed at you. "How long have you been staring at that thing, Yn?"
"Only ten minutes," you said sheepishly, standing up and walking over to your wardrobe. You were still in loungewear after you had taken a quick shower post-lectures. You knew you probably should have been at the theater tonight, but Renjun and Doyoung had waved you out of the building, telling you they "had it covered". You still worried.
He rolled his eyes and grabbed the doorknob. "Get dressed—it's just a shirt."
"It is not just a shirt, Lee."
He wagged his eyebrows, already closing the door. "You said it; not me…"
You glared at the closed door, but swallowed your fears, your nerves, your pride—and pulled the jersey over your head and over your tank top. Karina had suggested that you just wore shorts with the garment, but you realized now that the shirt fell to just about mid-thigh, basically hiding most of your shorts from view.
"Are you done? I want to see the floor from court side!"
Your eyes found the yellow cover of the book on your desk. Its cover read a pitiful Basketball for Dummies, and it was something you had bought on a whim at the bookstore yesterday in a sorry attempt to brush up on your basketball knowledge to ensure you didn't feel like a fool. You slung your small bag over your shoulder, leaving the book where it was, before you left the room. "You'll see plenty of the floor, alright!"
Felix was standing on the other side of the door, with Karina waiting by the couch. "Is that a threat, Ln?"
"Take it as you will."
The drive to the gymnasium was a brief one since yours and Karina's apartment wasn't far from campus. Finding parking? Now that was a whole different story.
Felix exhaled roughly as the three of you clambered out of his car, fresh night air rushing into your lungs after the stressful fifteen minutes of fighting for a parking space. It truly was war. All around you, car horns and squealing tires pierced through the night, only a taste of what you had just endured. Felix dragged a hand through his hair, huffing, "Christ, the people here are animals. Like seriously, it's like Black Friday!"
"I wouldn't compare it exactly to Black Friday," Karina mused. She adjusted the jacket on her shoulders to fit with the strap of her purse. Her eyes flickered to you. "Are you cold, Yn-ie? You can have my jacket?"
You dropped your hands from where they held your arms. It was a little chilly, but you should be able to manage until you got into the gym. You shook your head. "Nah, I'm okay. Just not used to…" You nodded to the jersey, your lack of pants. This was fine. Completely. You were practically swimming in the material.
Karina smiled at you and linked her arm with yours. "You look cute."
"You totes do!" Felix mocked a school girl squeal as he arrived on your other side, linking up with you. His asymmetrical silver earrings swung wildly from his earlobes as he began skipping through the tightly packed cars, dragging you and Karina behind him.
For a moment, you had allowed this to distract you from the whispers and glances you were getting from people. Once you reached the sidewalk to merge with the crowd of people headed for the gym, there was no way to hide the jersey now, except with a jacket. You held steady, kept your head level, and your eyes on the yawning doors to the gym.
"You think she made that herself?"
"It probably wouldn't cost a lot to make that. She must really want his attention."
You felt your friends' hold on you tighten, as if they were armoring up for something, but you wanted to tell them that you were fine. People could believe what they wanted to believe. By now, it was impossible not to draw attention to yourself.
The gym's bright fluorescent lights shone down on the court far below, and you and your friends showed your tickets to the nearest staff. He eagerly bounded down the stadium steps to show you your seats right where Chenle promised they would be—court side.
Felix could not get his mouth to close, or his eyes, as he gawked at the shiny floor under his soles. "Woah. This is so cool."
"I'm glad one of us is enjoying themselves," you chuckled, your hands finding your arms once more to hug yourself, maybe make yourself look smaller. From here, the big screens hanging above the court looked like the ones in Madison Square Garden, and everything just looked bigger, bolder. You had never watched a game from this angle, and you could only imagine how intense it got from here.
Once you were all settled, you felt a buzz from your back pocket.
zhong: hey u get here alright?
zhong: someone just told me they saw my jersey on u 👀
you: y r u acting surprised lol think I'd just leave it at home and say sike?
zhong: yeah kind of
you: zero faith
zhong: i'll make it up to u bby how does that sound?
you: and how exactly do u intend to do that?
zhong: win the game of course ;)
You shook your head, teeth gnawing on your bottom lip. This man was making your head spin with his words.
you: so u didn't plan on winning otherwise?
zhong: well yeah, that too
zhong: i might hug u when we win, just so u know
zhong: unless
you: let's slow it down, buddy
you: we can start w hugging
Perhaps you could hear his breathy chuckle in your ears now. It wasn't the classic, high pitched one that exploded and brightened a room whenever it happened, but the one that made your stomach twist with butterflies and your heart leap into your throat.
zhong: okok
zhong: i'll c u in a bit then, coach is calling us in
zhong: enjoy the game :)
you: good luck chenle
zhong: thanks yn
Karina nudged you with her elbow to show you something on her phone, and you pocketed your own into your small bag. Felix had gone somewhere to chat with someone he recognized a few rows back, and probably to boast about the amazing view he was going to get right on court side. He wouldn't ever forget that he watched the opening game from this vantage point.
Soon, Felix rushed back into his seat, body buzzing like a three year old on candy. "It's starting! Oh my god, here they come!" He gestured to the far opening where you could already see a mass of bodies lining up.
The announcer came on overhead, loud and clear, ready to hype up the crowd. "Live! From the honorable and world renowned SM University Stadium is the opening game of the season between the SM Sentinels and the FNC Falcons! Sponsored by KakaoCorp—where people and the world get connected; and Naver—helping businesses stay connected."
You could feel the energy in the room increase as the announcer introduced the FNC team to the arena, the team dressed in yellow and white. But it wasn't until everyone waited in bated breath for your own team to appear that the tension was palpable. You could practically taste it on your tongue.
"And now… put your hands together and make some noise for your—very own—SENTINELS!" The buzzer screamed loud, but the crowd screamed louder.
You could barely hear your own thoughts as you screamed your own heart out for the swarm of red that flooded into the stadium. The pep band on the other side of the stadium was playing some hype song—you thought it was Lil Nas X's Industry Baby, but at this point, all the sounds were melting together.
You caught a flash of that dark hair and terribly bright beam in the blurred masses. There was a red and white sweatband holding his hair back, and he greeted the crowd so proudly as he jogged along the border of the court.
And then there was that heartstopping realization as the team was approaching where you and your friends were, aiming for the silver benches about a foot in front of you. And suddenly, the only thought in your mind was—
"Zhong Chenle, you son of a bitch," Felix giggled in pure giddiness.
You caught Chenle's eyes as he was coming closer, stopping directly in front of you on the bench. There was this distinct gleam of approval in his eyes when he saw the jersey. He winked at you, then turned around so he faced the court.
He had put you right behind them. Directly.
The game quickly began, jumping straight into the first half of the game. You could barely keep your head straight as you tried either focusing on Chenle or the basketball being passed, Chenle or the basketball. Both moved swiftly throughout the court, weaving through and from player to player.
You could feel the weight of tension, the energy thrumming throughout the stadium like a heartbeat.
The ball swooshed through the FNC hoop once, twice, several more times. Chenle was passing the ball, dribbling it up, jumping up, passing it again. Each member of his own team worked seamlessly, like they were gears in one well-oiled machine. Now you knew why SMU was so revered on the basketball stage.
Players were switched in and out, replacing each player at least once, but sparingly and strategically throughout. Chenle was pulled out at one point, sweat dripping from his face, his hair, and he guzzled down an entire bottle of water in less than five seconds. He was heaving for breath, and soon, he was thrown back into the frenzy.
And then the buzzer blared. The first half was over.
You, Felix, and Karina all collectively let out equally relieved sighs. One glance at the scoreboard had your heart bursting into an excited overdrive again. SMU was winning. By a lot.
For the halftime show, it was something you definitely hadn't expected—a rap contest.
"Each of our beloved contestants, who are all members of your SMU Sentinels, by the way," explained tonight's host and SMU alumni, Johnny Suh, "will compete in saying a small paragraph that will be displayed on the screen. Whoever does it the fastest will be crowned our winner for the night!"
You and the rest of the crowd watched as people quickly brought on a whiteboard with a large poster of words printed on it. Lined up horizontally on the court, there were a handful of players, including Chenle. He didn't look nervous, but you knew he was cracking jokes to his teammates up there.
Jung Sungchan went first, raising the bar up incredibly high. Then it was Park Jisung, then Han Jisung who basically knocked the bar out of the ballpark. Seo Changbin raised it a little more after that. Chenle tried his hardest, but you caught his fumbling on tape. Bang Chan, Osaki Shotaro, and Lee Jeno all followed shortly. In the end, it was Han Jisung who walked away with the bragging rights of being the fastest speaker on the team.
"There you have it, folks! Our certified Eminem of SMU!" Johnny charmed the crowd as the team players bowed. "How about a round of applause for our participating Sentinels tonight?"
The game resumed shortly, and everyone was thrusted back into the tension and thrill.
The second half was noticeably more tense, as FNC strived to regain their disadvantage and SMU strived to keep their advantage. The points kept shooting upwards, and you could barely stay in your seat, but you somehow kept yourself anchored down to it.
At this point, your throat was hoarse from screaming just as much as Felix and Karina were.
By the time the buzzer blared for the final time, there was no doubt about who won. Everyone shot up from their seats in screams of pride and happiness. It was a complete madhouse in the stands, but everyone allowed the players on opposite teams to have their moment congratulating each other respectfully and with good sportsmanship.
And then Chenle was jogging his way over to you, brushing his sweat-dampened hair back. There was a massive, ear to ear grin on his face, and it only widened as you stood up and offered him what he had prefaced you with earlier.
"Hi," he said simply, stepping into your embrace and wrapping his arms around you. "Thanks for coming."
"Of course. Thanks for inviting me." You stepped back from him. "Even if you're all sweaty and gross," you commented, dramatically scrunching your face up.
Chenle laughed loudly. "Okay, get back here!" He teased you, opening his arms as if he meant to cage you again in his embrace; only chuckled when you feigned disgust. He looked at Karina and Felix then, greeting the latter with a fistbump. "Thanks for coming, too, guys. Your support means a lot."
"You guys did fantastic out there," Karina complimented with an approving nod.
Felix jumped in. "Oh my god, yes! That was so amazing, dude! And dude, the view from court side?" His eyes rolled back as he ascended to nirvana.
Chenle shrugged his shoulders, smiling eyes meeting yours. "Well, I hope you continue to like it then."
Your blond friend froze. "What? Uh, I—does that mean…?"
A nod.
You were certain Felix might faint from excitement, or at least, go running around telling everyone he just scored however many seats at court side. Felix disappeared to exactly that, and Karina sighed.
"I should probably go keep an eye on him." She passed you a knowing look, hand brushing against your arm. "Meet me outside when you're ready to head out, 'kay?"
You nodded, and she was melting into the crowd.
"So how'd you like it?"
You whirled back to Chenle, who had his head slightly tilted and arms folded over his chest. There was that twinkle in his gaze as he looked at you, and you had a feeling yours mimicked that. "The game? It was a lot of fun. Your rapping skills, however?" You shook your head and ran your hand across your neck in a definitive no.
He chuckled, stepping closer to you and gently holding your arms. "Good thing you don't like me for my rap skills then."
"Who said I liked you, Zhong?" You teased.
"I did," he replied, effortlessly arrogant. "I mean, I like you, too, so."
There he went again, making your heart feel like it could unlock your ribcage and fly.
"God, you're stupid," was the only thing you could say in response. Your cheeks were definitely burning brighter than his jersey, and you had to avert your gaze for a few seconds.
"Stupidly handsome, sexy, talented." He adopted a mocking thoughtful expression. "The list goes on and on."
You laughed at that, voice trailing off. "Um, by the way, you really made Felix's night with that thing you said back there. So thanks for that."
Chenle licked his lips, nodding. "I'm glad, but did I make yours?"
"Hm?"
"I'm glad I made Felix's night," he repeated, just a tad slower this time and with a small tilt of the corners of his mouth, "but did I make your night? That's all I really wanted—to make your night."
There was no doubt about it. You could only answer one correct answer because it was completely and utterly true. "Yes," you told him. "You made my night." And you hoped this wouldn't be the last. No, you definitely knew this wouldn't be the last.
—𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐕—
The Lucky Ones was written and directed by Huang Renjun, co-authored by his alumni friend Xiao Dejun, and sponsored by alumni and head of the SMU theater department Kim Doyoung. It was about this pair of teenagers who had fallen in love with each other, but realized later in life that their love had been quick to spark, and just as quick to sputter into ash and smoke. It was riveting, realistic, and alluring. The entire play was so well written and so well directed, and you wouldn't just say that because you were friends with the directors and playwrights.
As you strode through the bustling and chaos of backstage, you couldn't help the distinct feel of pride in your heart. All of this work to get everything to come together would be well worth it.
"Yn!" A familiar voice called to you from somewhere amongst the madness. Renjun was hustling over to you, the ends of his bow tie left undone, but his two-toned hair was styled to perfection. "What are you doing back here? You should be in the balcony already."
You rushed over to him and grabbed his tie, expertly and swiftly tying it into a bow. "I know, but Doyoung and Xiaojun needed me to smack some sense into you."
He scoffed. "Some sense? I'm completely fine. Not panicking, of course."
You gripped hard onto his shoulders and forced him to look at you. "Breathe, Jun. Just breathe. The show's gonna be perfect, okay? You've worked too damn hard for it not to be."
Renjun inhaled deeply, held it for a couple seconds, then exhaled slowly. He opened his eyes, nodding to you. "Okay. Yeah. I think I'm… calmer. Thank you, Yn."
"Good, okay." You smiled softly at him, his hand reaching to grab yours on his shoulder. "I'll see you in the balcony?"
"See you there. Say hi to Chenle for me?"
"Yeah, I'll let him know!"
In a few minutes, you had hustled your way out into the lobby and up the stairs to where the balcony for stage left was located. You knew that Chenle must already be waiting there for you, judging from the texts you saw light up your phone screen.
zhong: paging nurse to patient
zhong: i'm incredibly bored w/o my seatmate
zhong: nurse, i'm gonna need someone's hand to hold to get thru this
You snorted, covering your mouth sheepishly as you passed an older couple.
you: heels and velvet covered stairs do not go well
you: patience is a virtue
zhong: i just miss u 🤨 isn't that a virtue
You were already coming up on the doorway leading to the furthest balcony to the left. The usher at the door recognized you as the general stage manager, nodded and let you through. Even in your dark blue evening gown and fancy getup, you could still be recognized, which was reassuring. You definitely felt like you had overdone it.
The balcony was dark and relatively empty. There were a few couples scattered about the rows of seats, but you walked toward the lone form seated near the edge.
"You know, it was kind of embarrassing to walk in without a da—holy shit."
Chenle had twisted around in his seat only to find you making your way toward him in that dress. Well, to you, it was a dress. But to Chenle, it was the dress. The one he had subtly sent to Felix, who had sent it to Karina, who had sent it to you. It was quite the simple transaction, really, but god damn.
He thought you would look good, but he didn't think you would look this good. Like drop dead, fucking gorgeous. If he wasn't sitting, he might have dropped to his knees and prayed. Because what in the world had he done in his previous life to deserve meeting someone like you?
Of course, you were completely unaware of the purely simp thoughts running amuck in Chenle's head; you were only aware of the fact that he looked really handsome in his tux and that he was staring an awful lot.
"Hey," you said, settling in the seat next to him. "Is there, uh, something on my face?"
"Beauty," he said, almost in instinct, then cringed. "Sorry, that was the absolute worst."
You laughed, actually finding it funny. "No, that was good," you reassured with a very convincing nod of your head. "Renjun says hello. I had to go calm him before he started pacing. Hope you weren't waiting long."
Chenle nodded in understanding. "Ah, makes sense. No, I wasn't waiting long." He smiled at you. "Just couldn't wait to see you."
Flustered and flattered, you reached for his hand, lacing them over the arm rest between you. "Couldn't wait to see you, too. You clean up very nicely, Lele."
His lips parted, and you could've sworn his cheeks blushed a hard red. "Sorry, what?"
"Lele? You don't like the nickname—?"
"No, please—" he cleared his throat, hand squeezing yours lightly. "I—it's fine."
You grinned. You just made Zhong Chenle flustered. "Whatever you say, Lele. Anyway, thank you for coming tonight to see the show."
He regained composure quickly, to his credit. His thumb gently ran over your linked fingers. "Wouldn't miss it." For once, he couldn't choke out the words to tell you how beautiful you looked.
—𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐕𝐈—
It was about a week later that you were groggily ruffling through your damp hair with a towel as you walked into your room. It had been an awfully long day at the café, and because Felix had a dance comp and because Chenle had an away game in another city, you were left by your lonesome, overworked and bored out of your mind. You were about to get Renjun or Karina to come keep you company, but then Chenle had actually called you at work.
For the remainder of your shift, you had one earbud in, listening to him talk about his day while he listened to you talk about yours. Since his first game, you tried to go to all of his home games, and if the away games weren't too far, you would try to make it to those as well. And after the opening night at the theater, the two of you had grown even closer. You were practically inseparable, so the hours-long phone call from today was well appreciated.
You kicked the door to your bedroom closed, aiming for your phone sitting on the nightstand connected to the charger. The screen had gone dark after you had taken a very indulgent hot shower. So much so that steam had trailed after you when you opened the door, and you were certain you would hear from the landlady about your hot water use again sometime this week. Or at least, you would hear from Karina.
"You took that long to shower and you didn't invite me over?"
You rolled your eyes and silently thanked god that Chenle wasn't here to see your smile. Yes, the call was still going. "In your wildest dreams, Zhong. And how would you have gotten here anyway? Cube is like at least a nine hour drive."
"Are you saying that if I was in town, you would have invited me to join you?" You could practically hear the smile in his words, the way his eyebrows would dance with intent.
"You're incorrigible." You hung your damp towel on the end of your bed and crawled under your covers. The phone screen lit up again as you tapped it awake to be met with Chenle's profile picture: him with his hair tied in a ponytail, like a little sprout. It had actually been lovingly sent to you by Chenle's best friend, Park Jisung, sometime last week after the two of you formally met. Chenle always teased you for admitting he was cute in the photo, but you knew that he had originally been so embarrassed when he found out, and even threatened to give Jisung the silent treatment for "betraying" him like that. That bit of intel was courtesy of some of Chenle's roommates, Jisung himself and Sungchan.
Speaking of…
"Is that Yn? Hi Yn-ieeeeeee!!!" Jisung and Sungchan choruses from somewhere in their shared hotel room.
You laughed warmly. "Hi guys! Lele, lemme talk to them."
A beat of silence passed, and the phone was handed over. Jisung's voice was a lot louder now. "Haha, Yn, Chenle-ssi's sulking now."
Sungchan chimed in, "Yeah, he glared at us just now."
"Ah well, I requested to speak with you both," you said. "I've been talking to him all evening. How are you both? How's Cube?"
"Oh," Jisung replied brightly, "it's so beautiful, actually! Their campus is really pretty."
"Yeah, I'm really glad we got to stay for a few days." This was Sungchan again. "Maybe next time you can tag along!"
You smiled, fidgeting with the hem of your blanket. "Yeah, I'd like that."
"Okay, I think Chenle might beat our asses in the morning if he doesn't get the phone back this instant," Jisung laughed again.
The phone was passed for the second and last time tonight. There were sounds of shuffling again, then laughter from far off, and then a huff of annoyance. "Hi baby."
"Oh, stop sulking, Lele," you admonished playfully. "They only wanted to say hello."
"I know." You could hear him settle into his bed, or at least, sit down somewhere. "I like talking to you though."
"I know; I like talking to you, too." A thought suddenly occurred to you. "Don't you have practice tomorrow morning?" You asked him. You tucked yourself in, eyes pinned to his smiling face in the profile picture, suddenly wishing he was closer. "You should sleep."
Chenle's warm chuckle echoed through your phone. "You'll miss me too much, baby. But I'll let you fall asleep first, how does that sound?"
The corners of your mouth curled upward. "You're so stupid."
"Stupidly in love with you."
The words made your heart stop, and you swore you could hear a slap from the other side, as if he had slapped his hand over his mouth.
You sat up. You suddenly weren't too tired. "Lele… can we talk?" You asked quietly, sitting up against your headboard.
You heard shuffling and a curse from the other side, along with murmuring. After a door had closed in the background, he said, "Um yeah. Sorry, had to get out of the room. Uhm…" You would never know how fast his heart beat in that moment alone, the utter fear he held believing he might have just stepped over a line. "Sorry, was that too much?"
"Was it, like, a joke?" You bit your lip, then clarified, "Are you serious about that? Your feelings?"
A sigh. "Yn, I really like you. It scares me to bits how much I do."
Your nerves soothed at that. At least you were both feeling the same thing. "Okay, same," you murmured.
"Ugh, I can't believe I'm doing this over the goddamn phone!" He made a noise of anguish and you giggled. "I'm sorry, baby. No grand gesture," he groaned, "but we both feel the same way, right? Can I—can I be your boyfriend?"
Of course, he would give you the ultimate decision. And of course, there were no doubts in your mind.
—𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐕𝐈𝐈—
You know those rumors you had been so worried about before? You couldn't give two shits about them now.
It was a Sunday, generally the only free day that you and Chenle shared consistently. Today, you were sitting in a window seat of a dim sum restaurant, gazing out at the duck pond just outside the window. The willow tree leaves drifted peacefully in the mid-spring breeze, flowers blooming in their wake. It was a beautiful scene to behold.
Arms came around from behind you, lips pressing to your temple. "Hi, baby. Sorry I'm late." Chenle slid into the seat across from you, freshly showered, and bright as usual. He wore a dark blue sweatshirt and dark jeans,with his Ray Bans hanging from his collar—just a casual look for a casual brunch date.
"It's okay; you had practice," you told him and brought your cup of tea to your lips. "How was it this morning?"
Chenle gave a half-hearted shrug. "Tiring, as usual, but good." The team had been practicing relentlessly this past week since finals were coming up soon. It was a miracle that the two of you even made time for each other since you and the theater company were gearing up for closing night of The Lucky Ones. Shows had been selling out just as fast as the seats in the stadium, and while you didn't watch every showing of the play like you did opening night, you were in the gym watching Chenle and his team beat every competitor who set foot in there.
This Friday would be finals between SMU and YGU, and when the Sentinels beat them too, Championships would be held next week. You were all hoping that Championships would be held at SMU instead of the other school. It wouldn't make a difference whether or not you would go, because you planned to definitely be there, but it would be great to have home court advantage.
As Chenle raised his hand and flagged down a nearing cart, your gaze wandered to the grassy pond area outside. It seemed to be a wonderland for all of the dogs whose owners were inside eating brunch without them, but they were all playing together.
The smell of fresh steamed buns and a whole smorgasbord of spices permeated your nose as BBQ pork buns, shrimp shumai, fried squid, and shrimp rice rolls drizzled with a sweet soy sauce were placed onto your table. Chenle was already whipping out his chopsticks and wiping them with a napkin. "Bon appetit." He followed where you had been looking briefly out the window. "So many cute dogs out there."
"I know," you cooed, reaching for a pork bun. "It'd be nice to have a dog. I think I've wanted one since I was a kid, actually, but owning a dog is like having a child."
"I have a dog," Chenle said offhandedly.
Your eyes positively lit up, and he chuckled at how cute you were. "You do? But I never see anyone else at your apartment."
"She's in Shanghai." He shoved the rest of the shumai into his mouth before reaching into his pocket and withdrawing his phone. "When I moved to Seoul," he said as he swiped through his phone with a furrowed brow, "I left her with my cousin, Ningning."
He then showed you his phone screen where a slightly younger version of Chenle was taking a selfie, but with a small, white ball of fur peeking over his shoulder.
The further he swiped, the more you just melted. "Aw, she's so cute. What's her name?"
Chenle smiled fondly at the photo he just pulled up. "Daegal. Yeah, I miss her a lot."
"Why didn't you bring her to college with you?" You asked and broke apart the bun, steam flowing up out of the yawning mouth of fluffy, white bread.
"Ah, I thought it would be too much of a hassle at the time, but I haven't been home for a while, so I haven't seen her in a long time." He suddenly frowned, and you figured it'd been awhile since he thought of going home. He must have been so immersed in his life here, and you wondered if he would have ever thought of going back.
"Have you ever thought about going home for a bit? Y'know, to take a break?"
His face shuttered, like he was thinking of something. "No, not for a long time." And by his clipped tone, you knew to not touch that subject. But he was back to his pleasant self in an instant, "So what's the plan for today? Go roller skating, go swimming—god, I haven't seen you in a bathing suit yet? What is this—"
You slapped a hand over his mouth, red seeping onto your cheeks. He only snickered under your palm, and you hoped that everyone around you either didn't hear that comment or was choosing to ignore it. Either way, you hoped it didn't draw too much attention. But then again, Chenle himself drew attention.
"Are you crazy?" You whisper-shouted at him after you removed your hand and sat back down in your seat. "Why'd you say that so loud?"
Chenle's eyebrows danced in amusement. "I'm very passionate about the subject."
You deadpanned. "Well, I don't think America heard you."
"America would be lucky to see you in a swimsuit," he shrugged and flagged down another cart, this time, with his eyes set on the Chinese broccoli in oyster sauce. His eyes twinkled. "As for me, I'd be very happy to see you in a swimsuit."
You tried to ignore the fact that your face was on fire. "You'll just have to wait then. I have a date."
Chenle wrinkled his nose at you sourly. "With who?"
"Felix and Karina—ooh, are those taro buns on that cart?"
Chenle was quick to flag down that cart, too, and got you a nice plate of four of them. He idly scratched his jaw, bottom lip pouting. "So I'm being cockblocked by your best friends?"
"Yah! Zhong Chenle!"
He bursted into laughter, the joyful sound drawing eyes, but making your fake anger melt away into fondness. "Sorry, baby, you're just so cute when you're flustered."
"That makes one of us," you muttered cheekily.
"Hey!"
You chuckled. "Deserved."
He made a face, cheeks puffed out as he scowled at the plates of food. "Remind me to not get you taro buns next time."
—𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐕𝐈𝐈𝐈—
It was late when you finally made your way back in through the back door of the performing arts buildings, walking back to the theater through the back hallway. Tonight had been closing night of The Lucky Ones, and as usual, it had all gone incredibly well. Renjun, for the first time in the history of you knowing him, had bursted into tears as he bowed with his actors on the stage at curtain call. You had just walked the man to his car and now needed to hurry back to lock everything up for the night.
As you neared the backstage area, your footsteps faltered at the sound of music playing. Like from the grand piano backstage. You kept your footsteps light as you made your way toward the backstage door that was left open so the gentle serenade drifted out into the hall.
The stage lights had been turned off earlier to save energy, and the only light was from the little lightbulb hanging in the backstage area, above the piano.
You peered into the room, not wanting to interrupt the beautiful music being played, but knowing that no one else should be here. "Hello?"
The music stopped.
"I'm sorry," you said, stepping inside the doors, "but you're not supposed to… Lele?"
Even though he had a black hood thrown over his dark bangs, you still recognized his pretty eyes, rimmed in silver and red—like he'd been crying. He swiped at his damp cheeks, and you realized that, yes, he definitely had been.
"Oh, honey…" you murmured, rushing over to him and swallowing him in your embrace. Chenle wasted no time burying his face into the crook of your neck and hugging your waist tightly. Your hand gently rubbed his back in an attempt to soothe him. "Hey, are you okay, what's wrong?"
Last night was the game against YG, to which, of course, the Sentinels had won. Everyone had gone home jubilant and hyped for championships next week against HYBE U. Chenle had gone out to celebrate with his teammates last night, so you hadn't seen him since, only talked with him over call and text like usual. So maybe something had happened between that?
He sniffled. "You weren't answering your phone, so I came here, and you weren't in your office, so…" He half-heartedly gestured to the piano. "I thought I'd try to… distract myself a little."
You brushed your lips against his head. "I'm sorry, honey. I had my phone on silent for the show, and I was walking Renjun out to his car. I—do you want to talk about it?"
He shook his head. "Just want you."
"Okay, that's okay." You patted his head gently. "I didn't know you played piano. You're really good." And that was the truth. The notes had flowed together as smoothly as a river, and it had almost lured you to dance on the stage—if you could dance. It was like his hands had been made to play.
"It's been awhile," he said as an explanation. "Did you like it?"
"I liked it a lot. It's so beautiful; just like you, you know that?"
Checked suddenly raised his head from your shoulder to look at you. You could see the glisten of unshed tears waiting to spill and follow their predecessors down the slopes of his cheeks. His bottom lip trembled. "Yn," he rasped, "be honest with me."
You prompted him to continue, worry plaguing your mind.
"Do you like me—just for my money? Are you with me because I pay for things and get you things and all that?"
So this was what this was about. You shook your head earnestly. "No. No, no, of course not, Chenle." You reached for his hands and laced your fingers together, both of you staring down at your hands. "Chenle, I like you because you're sweet and hilarious and brilliant. I like you because you make my days and you always care about how I am, that you're not afraid to be with me. You show me off, but you respect my boundaries; you support me like I want to support you all the time.
"Maybe the money is how you show your affection, and I appreciate it a lot, but it's not what I like about you," you told him. "Even if you were dirt poor, I wouldn't care. I would still feel the same about you." You saw the tears falling down his cheeks and reached up to brush them away. "Are you okay, Lele? Really?"
Chenle nodded, raising his head so you could see the trembling smile on his face. "You really mean all that?"
"Yes, of course. I wouldn't lie about something like that. And I hope I can show you just as much love as you deserve."
The flood would not stop; he swiped again at his tears. "Yn, I—" I love you. "Thank you."
"You don't have to thank me for loving you, Chenle."
He lifted his hands up to cup your face in his hands, and he slowly brought your face to his. "Yn, can I kiss you?"
Your breath hitched in your throat. "Yeah," you nodded, "yeah, you can kiss me."
Chenle brought his mouth to yours, his salty tears on his lips and brushing against your cheeks. You slid closer to him on the piano stool and let him tilt your head back with one hand, the other sliding down your body to hold your waist. Everything about him overwhelmed your senses—the familiar scent of his expensive cologne, the feel of his hair between your fingers, his warm touch making butterflies soar in your stomach.
He slowly pulled away, forehead resting against yours as your breathing intermingled. Then he braced his hand against the stool right next to your leg and pushed himself closer to you, pressing his lips to yours once again.
Under the dull glow of the lightbulb, Chenle kissed you in the empty theater, the dead of night. His tears had dried up by now, no longer there, and he was hauling you onto his lap with your legs dangling off the side of the bench. His hands were everywhere, fingertips trailing fire through the fabric of your clothing. He was clinging onto dear life, memorizing your every curve and edge…
And you couldn't help but think of all the words he was trying to say through his actions.
—𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐈𝐗—
Chenle did not wake up to the comfort of your weight on his chest. He squeezed his eyes shut from the light streaming through the bedroom window, and reached his arm over to the other side of the bed, only to meet cold sheets instead of your body that he could latch onto again. He groaned into the pillow and rolled over. When his eyes finally adjusted to the morning light, he sat up and let the sheets pool around his waist.
You had been sleeping over at his place for the past several nights, ever since he snuck into the theater at night to find you. You stayed here at his insistence, of course, but either he or you had to leave before the other woke up because of work, practice, or classes. Today, Friday, was Championship day.
He leaned over to his bedside table and grabbed his phone. A smile broke out onto his face at the sight of you as his lock screen. It was a picture from the opening night of The Lucky Ones, with you in that gorgeous blue gown. The two of you had taken a mirror selfie in the hallway of the theater, just before leaving for the night. His arm was settled comfortably on your waist, your body leaning into his. Your faces were hidden behind the phone, but it was enough to let anyone know that he was happily taken.
The inside home screen was just you, but much more recent. It was dinner right here in the penthouse, but caught candidly. You had been enraptured by the TV, mindlessly shoveling noodles into your mouth. He had caught the moment right before you were going to open your mouth again, with that innocent, cute dazed look in your eyes and the chopsticks of noodles held just below your chin.
He bit his lip with a smile and opened up your text chain. You had already left him a message.
bbygrl: good morning love <3 had to leave for my 8am
bbygrl: i'll c u later tonight for the game!! good luck and have a good day x
He was about to send you a message back when another notification appeared on his phone screen.
(鸡蛋 - egg ; 笨蛋 - stupid)
鸡蛋: chenle they're asking again, i can't keep stalling
笨蛋: u have to keep stalling
鸡蛋: idiot do u understand how difficult it is to withhold ur phone number from them??? AND maintain innocence???
鸡蛋: they're getting suspicious
笨蛋: uh get better at acting??? 🤨
鸡蛋: ur so fxking stupid.
Chenle exhaled sharply and swiped out of his cousin's direct texts and back to yours. Ningning was one of his closest cousins who still lived back in Shanghai. She not only took care of Daegal, but was also the person on the inside trying to stall to give him some more time. Time and freedom from what was a whole other can of worms.
lele: gm baby missed u this morning :(
bbygrl: you'll see me later
lele: ur texting in class? 🤭 bad, bad girl
lele: u should be punished
bbygrl: …if u shut up, i'll kiss u
lele: right now?? bEt
God, how did he go so long without kissing your face. He could feel the plushness of your lips on him right now, on his mouth, on his cheek, on his neck. He needed your lips stained red to stain his skin over and over again. He wanted you to scar him with your love.
bbygrl: sighs chenle go get ready for practice
lele: yes ma'am x love u
bbygrl: i love u too
And he giggled as he hopped out of bed and went to get ready for the day.
—𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐗—
Your heart was pounding as the timer on the scoreboard counted down. You were in the second half of the championship game against HYBE University, one of the up and comers lately who was just rising to popularity and in skill. They had a lot of new, talented players lately, but not enough to beat the Sentinels.
"—Choi passes to Lee! Ooh—blocked firmly by number 17, Bang Chan!"
Felix was gripping your hand tightly in his as the three of you—you, Karina, and Felix—all leaned forward in your seats to watch the game. You thought the tension was palpable during the first game of the season, but you clearly hadn't watched a championship game before. At this point, electricity buzzed through the air and the tension was so thick, you could probably cut it with a knife.
"Twenty seconds on the clock to break the tie! Number 30, Zhong, maneuvering his way through to get the ball to his teammates!"
You murmured under your breath like a prayer, "Come on, Lele. Come on, Chenle; you can do this."
Your eyes feverishly followed as Chenle dribbled the ball, only to get stopped by Lee Heeseung from Hybe U. Chenle made eye contact with Han Jisung and Park Jisung, both the only two the most open. He feigned left, then passed the ball between Heeseung and Choi Yeonjun.
In slow motion, you saw Huening Kai and Han Jisung go after the ball at the same time—then time returned to normal, fast paced vision, and Han Jisung swiped the ball and passed it to Sungchan. In a smooth alley oop, Sungchan caught the ball and dunked it into the basket.
"And the tie is broken with five seconds to spare!"
You saw the players converge on the ball under the net in an attempt to either get it to the other side in a miracle maneuver, or keep it closely guarded.
It was the latter, and victory rang through the gym with a loud air horn, along with showers of red and silver confetti.
After a brief exchange of sportsmanship from both teams, Chenle came barreling out of the crowd toward you like a bullet. Sweat glistened over the sharp planes of his grinning face, and he raked a hand through his dampened locks. You both collided together, you jumping up into his arms, him swinging you around, then kissing you firmly on the mouth. It said sincerely, earnestly, I love you.
—𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐗𝐈—
"Hey, Chenle, how the hell did you get Yn to like you?"
Chenle lazily looked up from his phone to where Sungchan and Jisung were both gazing at him expectantly. They were all situated in Jisung and Sungchan's shared apartment at the moment, hanging out and watching the game. "It's called having a personality, Park."
Sungchan oohed at Chenle's burn, to which Jisung rolled his eyes.
Chenle laughed. "It's just one of those things, y'know? It happens if it should. If it's meant to be, it should." He shrugged, thinking about it for a moment more. "Guess I'm just really lucky."
"When did you get so sappy?" Sungchan teased as he shifted his position on the couch, smiling at his friend.
"He wasn't in love before," Jisung chimed in with a wagging finger in Chenle's direction. "So what? You're just gonna give all the credit to luck? You're one of the lucky ones?"
Chenle considered it. He picked up his can of sparkling water and dunked the rest of it down his throat. "Yeah. I mean, Yn's… Yn." He couldn't help the smile that crawled onto his face. "I got her attention at first, but I think I'm lucky she didn't just blow me off because I sounded like a douche."
Jisung snorted. "That you are."
Chenle rolled his eyes. "Shut up, singleton."
"Ugh, look what married life has done to you!" Sungchan groaned jokingly. "You gotta help me, dude. I wanna find true love."
"Only if you're serious."
Jisung wrinkled his nose and stood up to walk over to the kitchen and pour himself another glass of whatever he was drinking. "True love's dumb, but Yn's cool."
"Yn is cool," Sungchan agreed. "Chenle is not."
Chenle scowled, then rose from his seat. "I'm done being bullied by you two losers."
As he showed himself out of their cozy apartment, he heard Sungchan yell, "Say hi to Bestie Yn for me!" Chenle tsked under his breath and shook his head. But yes, going to see you would be a fantastic idea.
He quickly glanced at his phone for the time—4:59pm. He could probably swing by that chicken place you really liked and catch you for dinner. With a plan in his mind's eye, he hurried down to his car and sped off.
Chenle was coming out of the fried chicken eatery just a few blocks from your apartment when his phone lit up with an incoming call. He dumped the takeout bag into the front seat, but frowned down at the unknown number. He wasn't expecting a call, but he figured there was no harm in answering.
"Hello?"
"Son, it's been a while since I've heard your voice."
Chenle immediately hung up and blocked the number. He knew it was no use since they had his number now, but it made him feel slightly better as he took off toward your apartment. The whole way there, numbers continued to call his phone; he would probably have to power off his phone while he was up there with you, or just leave it here, in the car.
But when the stupid thing would not stop buzzing, he parked in your complex parking lot and picked up the call again.
"What do you want?"
A muscle feathered in his jaw as his father spoke on the other end. "That is a terrible way to greet your father, Chenle. We've been trying to reach you for several months now."
Chenle poked the inside of his cheek with his tongue. He knew. "Yeah, and you have my number now." Unfortunately.
"You will be coming to the Spring Gala in May, won't you? I've already put you down as—"
"I'm not."
His father paused. "Excuse me?"
Chenle glared out the front windshield of his car. "I said I'm not. I don't have time to fly back and forth for that and school. And I don't want any part of whatever business scheme you and Mom want to drag me into."
There was a beat of silence on the other end, and Chenle was so close to calling it a victory. "You will fly back home and attend the gala, Zhong Chenle. You can make up for your schoolwork later. You have a future—a business to run."
"Against what will? My own." Chenle scoffed as he glanced at the car's clock on the console. He had to go now if he was gonna catch you before you actually started eating dinner. He grabbed the bag of chicken, squeezing his phone between his shoulder and ear, as he climbed out of the car. "I already know what's going to happen as soon as I get there. I refuse to acknowledge that I have a fiancée when I didn't even propose to her."
His father let out a disgruntled, irritated sigh. "Chenle—"
"No."
"Stop interrupting me—"
Chenle rolled his eyes as he pulled the phone away from his ear as his father lectured away on the other side of the phone. He silently counted to twenty in his head, kicking the lobby door of your apartment complex shut behind him, then trudged up the stairs with his other hand holding a bag of takeout. He pressed the phone to his ear. "Are you finished?"
"Zhong Chenle, have some manners and respect—"
Chenle nearly growled into the phone. "You want to talk manners and respect? How about not forcing me to marry a woman I'm not in love with? What is this? The 1800s?"
There was one more flight of stairs left and Chenle's voice echoed against the walls. He always complained about how your apartment complex lacked an elevator, and you would always reply with something sassy like "climb up the window then" or "buy them an elevator or something". The irony was that he could buy the landlord an elevator if he wanted to. But that would definitely be a bit of overkill.
And everything was perfect. Even without an elevator.
Well, so far. His father was threatening to screw everything up again, but Chenle liked to think he had everything under control.
"An alliance with Jin Tech is imperative."
"And marriage is the answer?" Chenle scoffed as he bursted onto your floor. He nodded and smiled a hello to one of your neighbors as he passed, before lowering his voice and hissing into the phone. "Nevermind. I don't have time for this now or ever. I'm not coming home so you and Mom can just ship me off to some woman I don't even know the name of!"
"Her name is Alice Jin—"
"I really don't care."
"I will disown you if you don't come home and meet your fiancée," his father's tone firm and stone cold serious. Chenle wasn't afraid of many things, but that tone made a shiver crawl down his back. "That's a promise."
He opened his mouth, ready to say something back so that his father didn't think those words affected him in any way—
"Lele?"
Chenle slammed his thumb against the end call button, slapping a smile onto his face. You were just unlocking your apartment with your hair falling in gentle waves down your shoulders and your small purse slung over your shoulder. "Baby!"
You smiled at him, unknowing and oblivious to the call he had just hung up on. You peered at him curiously. "Hi, honey, what're you doing here?"
"Eating dinner with you, silly," he chirped, breezing past you into your apartment. He set the bag on your kitchen table, already pulling containers out. "Thought I'd swing by 'cause I missed you at lunch, and I was on my way home and your favorite chicken place was just—well, there. So I obviously had to get some for you… what?"
You pursed your lips, an amused look settled on your pretty features. Jeez, you were so pretty. "Are you okay? You're a bit… frazzled right now."
Chenle's cheery expression dropped for a millisecond as his mind flashed back to the phone call. Come home for the spring gala. Meet your fiancée. But his grin was back in an instant. "Yeah, I'm good." He flicked his wrist, a brief dismissal of the subject, then suddenly pulled you into a hug. Shoving his face into the crook of your neck, he tried to suppress the wave of guilt and dread building up in his stomach. "Just missed you, baby."
Your warm arms came around him as you gently rubbed his back. "Oh, I missed you, too, Lele."
You won't when you find out, he thought to himself.
But for now, as you and him sat down together to have dinner, as he took in your laughter and smiling face, as he remembered all of the reasons why he fell in love with you… he could fool himself into thinking that this could be his forever.
—𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐗𝐈𝐈—
Disownment. The word reverberated around in Chenle's skull as he sat in his desk chair at home, computer open. The screen displayed the Shanghai Airlines website page, his cursor primed over the "confirm" button. The page detailed a round-trip flight to Shanghai's Pudong International Airport, set for the Sunday night of spring break to the Saturday morning right before it ended. He didn't want to spend any more time than he needed to be.
This would be this upcoming weekend, which was happening far too soon, now that he thought about it. He couldn't… how was going to do this without the people he had around him now? He would have Ningning, and that was about it. Kun hardly went back home now, and you… oh god, what was he going to tell you?
Chenle buried his face in his hands, rubbed them over his eyes, wanted to wash everything away and to shut everything up. What was he going to do?
He reached over to the touchpad of his laptop and pressed the confirmation button. He might as well have signed away his freedom if he stepped foot back in Shanghai, but—that ten letter word haunted him to his core.
He couldn't breathe. Jesus Christ, he needed to breathe.
His phone buzzed from the table and sent his soul flying out of his body for a second. But then he saw your pretty face in the caller ID and knew the pounding of his heart wasn't just from anxiety, but from the pure feeling he had for you.
Without hesitation, he answered. "Hi baby. What's up?"
Your beautiful voice met his ears, like the voices of heaven. He stared at the confirmation for his flight on the laptop screen. "Hey honey, what're you up to?"
He swallowed, scratching the nape of his neck, then closed the lid of his laptop. "I'm, uhm, I actually just booked a flight back to Shanghai." He cleared his throat and walked away from the laptop, toward the window in the living room overlooking the city. "I'm going back for Spring Break."
"Oh, that's great! Sounds like so much fun, Lele."
If only you knew. "Yeah," he said half-heartedly.
You sensed his tone and told him gently, "Hey, are you getting enough sleep? I was gonna ask if you wanted to hang out at the office with me, but I'd rather you catch up on—"
"No, I'll be there." He was already halfway out the door, keys and jacket and wallet swiped on the way out. "I really need to get out of this apartment," he chuckled. "I'll meet you there? Or I can pick you up."
"I'm here already," you admitted cheekily. "I'll see you in five, love."
Chenle hummed. "See you then, baby. Love you."
"Love you, too. Drive safe."
When you hung up, he tucked his phone away to race off toward the university theater. On his way, however, he swung by the drive-thru Starbucks to grab you something to drink. Knowing you and the theater office, you would be there until you were literally drooling over manuscripts and bills. And knowing him, he would probably be knocked out as soon as he sat down.
He was striding in through the performer's entrance, passing by plenty of students and peers who he recognized ever since you and him became a "thing". But generally, as he greeted people he passed warmly and who greeted him the same way, he thought that he had been accepted here. His heart clenched at the thought. He had a basketball family, he had a community, he had his friends, he had you. What would happen in Shanghai? Would it change his entire life?
Knocking briefly on your closed door, he swiftly let himself into the room. Your head perked up at his entrance, and even more so at the cup of coffee in his hand.
"Oh my god, I love you!" You gasped, making grabby hands.
Chenle grinned, eyes smiling just like his mouth. You were so cute. He shook his head, pulling the coffee out of reach from you. "Nuh-uh, I want my compensation first."
You pouted, but you leaned up to press a kiss to his mouth. "Thank you, Lele. You're so thoughtful." You took the warm cup from him and took a careful sip.
He plopped into the seat across from you with a satisfied hum. "So what're you working overtime on today?"
"What do you mean overtime?" You asked innocently, your head already bowed over your documents.
"You know exactly what I mean." Chenle stood up and rounded the desk. Before you could object, he was lifting you off your chair. He sat himself in it, then placed you onto his lap. He peered over your shoulder. "Ew, why is that deadline so soon?"
You deadpanned. "That's exactly why I have to work overtime. The idiot at the office likes to give me this shit two weeks too late."
Chenle dug his nose into your neck to let the comforting smell of your perfume calm him down. Disownment. Shanghai. Fiancée. You. "Mm, the bastard. Want me to go talk to him?"
"No, it's okay. I'm good at making deadlines."
His mind wandered off to those skyscrapers across the Yellow Sea. Five days away from here. Things could change in five days. "Do you think you'd be done by dinner? We could go out to eat."
You made a noise of approval. "Yeah, I can be done by then. Any ideas?"
"You can choose. I just have an idea for afterwards. A moment of spontaneity, if you will."
You laughed. "We're planning it out beforehand, honey, that's not spontaneity."
Chenle pouted into your skin, wrapped his arms around you, and draped his body over your back. He watched your pen twirl and spin through your fingers. "Close enough."
"Well, what did you have in mind?"
—𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐗𝐈𝐈𝐈—
The last thing you thought Chenle would do was drive you to some random neighborhood and to its sketchy basketball court, caged in the classic wire fencing and with amber street lights as its only light source. It was perhaps nine o'clock at night, and you had just finished eating dinner (finishing that document had taken a little longer than anticipated, but Chenle had seemed content to wait). The sky had darkened to a midnight cobalt, and you couldn't really see the stars, but it was a clear night out.
Chenle parked along the curb just across from the gate and was already tearing his seatbelt off.
You balked for just a moment. "Uhhhh, is this where I get murdered and dumped in an abandoned parking lot?"
He rolled his eyes. "Aish, you're so dramatic," he joked, tugging at your hand, "come on. I have a ball in the trunk."
The car door slammed shut on his side after he climbed out, and you were left in the silence of the empty car. Was that euphemism or…?
You slapped your hand to your forehead; you spent way too much time with Chenle. Not sparing another moment thinking about it, you followed Chenle out into the cool night. He was already hunched over the trunk of his car, digging through his basketball duffle bag.
"Jesus, you need to wash that thing," you grimaced, taking a step back.
He only laughed, pulling a basketball out of seemingly nowhere and slamming the trunk closed. He locked the car, offering his free hand to you. "I'm doing laundry before I leave," he reassured.
"I'd hope so," you muttered and faked a gag.
As Chenle pushed past the gate, you took a second to really look around at your surroundings. It was a classic neighborhood park with a playground over a little ways down the path, a grassy hill for kids and dogs to run around on, and of course, this court. There was a tennis court connected to it on one side of the fence, too.
Chenle released your hand and started to dribble as soon as his foot hit the faded lines outlining the basketball court on the grey cement. He dribbled the ball all the way to the three pointer line, stopped, then shot.
Nothing but net.
He grinned at you. "Easy enough. Your turn."
You sent him an incredulous look. "I don't think so."
He made a face, jogging over to get the ball back and to dribble it over toward you. He passed it, letting it bounce once before you caught it in your hands. It seemed like a very high quality (?) basketball, like it wouldn't deflate on you. To be honest, you probably hadn't touched a basketball since high school, and you told Chenle as much.
"Well, that's why I'm here, silly," he said and guided you over and across the court so you stood at midcourt. "Remember how to dribble?"
"I do." And you idly began dribbling the ball in place, using the pads of your fingers to push the ball down against the cement.
"Good," he praised. "Now dribble up to inner court."
"Say please," you stuck your tongue out at him over your shoulder, but walked and dribbled the ball all the way to the inner court. You figured you probably couldn't make a basket from the three pointer line anyway.
Once you were at inner court, you stopped the ball in your hands and made a sad attempt at shooting the ball into the net. It rebounded hard off the rim, and Chenle stopped it midair with one hand. He passed it to his other before returning it to the cement to be dribbled.
"That was cute."
You wrinkled your nose at him. "Oh, shut up."
He chuckled, placing the ball back into your hands. He stood behind you and guided your arms in the correct form. His voice was seated right by your ear, the warmth of his breath sending zaps of energy down your spine and to your curling toes. "You just need to follow through. Like this."
His hands moved yours to mimic correct shooting technique. Then he added, "You want to make sure when you shoot, your hands follow through and send it where it should be. If your hands aren't directed toward the hoop, it probably won't go in."
You nodded, and once you felt him take a step back, you tried again. You let the ball boost off the page of your fingertips once more, this time, keeping your follow-through. The ball didn't make it in the hoop, but it rolled around the rim once before slipping off the edge.
"Damn," you murmured and went to retrieve it.
"That was a lot better though," Chenle said with a glimmer in his eyes. You could feel the excitement and amusement rolling off him in waves. "Try again."
And you did. Until you made a stupid basket.
"Yes, yes, yes! Let's go!" You shouted, jumping for absolute fucking joy. Your grinning face met his as you stomped your foot on the ground in victory. "Did you see that? I finally got one!"
Chenle chuckled, nodding and indulging you with applause. "I did, baby. I'm proud of you."
The two of you would end up passing the ball around to each other, one of you taking a shot here or there. He taught you how to play Horse, too, and eventually, he went to get a mini Bluetooth speaker from his magical dufflebag to play some music.
"This is not fair!" You growled, nearly climbing up him like a tree as he held the basketball high above his head. "Chenle!"
Your boyfriend giggled like a maniac, not even bothering to fend you off as you braced your arms on his shoulders and tried to hoist yourself up. You clawed at the air in desperate attempts to get the ball from him, but the bastard was messing with you. "You're almost there, Yn-ie! Look!"
You were not.
You glared at him.
Chenle's laughter faded just a little bit. "Okay, okay. I'll give you the ball back if I get my compensation."
"That sounds familiar," you said, easily going up to him. You hauled him down by his neck, despite his squawk of surprise, and kissed him. As you pulled back, your teeth nipped his bottom lip.
His thumb came up to graze his bottom lip, tongue licking it, eyes growing darker. "Come here."
You giggled, backing away. "No."
"Yn," he said while slowly approaching you like a predator to his prey. He set the basketball down. "Come here, baby."
"No, no, no—AH!" Your laughter filled the night air as you darted off across the court, making a large loop around the wired perimeter. Chenle was hot on your tail the entire time, his own laughter intermingling with yours.
You were heaving for breath (goddamn, you were out of shape), and so clearly, Chenle caught you. He wound his arms around you, caged you in his embrace. You squealed, squirming in his hold, but he held fast and tight.
It was at this moment that both Chenle and you recognized the song playing. It was an old one, the lyrics prefaced by the melody of trumpets and violins.
"You know how to waltz, Zhong?"
He pulled a smile, but it was like there was something sad in it. "Ballroom dance. But yeah."
You mocked a curtsy to him. "May I have this dance then?"
He answered you by holding out his hand for you to take. You placed your right hand in his, and he guided you to the middle of the basketball court. You placed your left hand on his shoulder, his free hand on your waist. And you both marked the three-fourths time before stepping into the sway of a waltz.
You let your cheek rest against his chest as he pulled you closer and you were just swaying to the beat. Chenle rested the side of his cheek against your head, pressing a kiss to your hairline.
You could hear the speed of his heart, the quickness of its beat.
"Lele."
"Mhm."
"I love you."
His heartbeat quickened under your ear. Ba-thump, ba-thump, ba-thump.
He swallowed. "Yn, I love you, too."
—𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐗𝐈𝐕—
"Oh my god, how does Chenle stand you? You're so boooooring, Yn." Felix groaned from where he laid upside down on your couch. His socked feet were sticking up the back, giving you a strange view from your vantage point in the kitchen.
You had just dropped Chenle off at the airport to head off to Shanghai about an hour ago. He had been an awful lot clingier the past few days leading up to the trip, but you supposed you understood since he would be leaving Seoul after being here for so long. New-old environments could be weird.
You were a little worried about him, but maybe that was just the thought of being away from him for five days. You'd gone days without seeing each other, but that was because you frequently called and texted. You didn't know what he'd be doing in Shanghai, but you were sure you could pick up any call he dialled. You weren't doing anything spectacular this break anyway.
In response to Felix, you said nothing. Instead, you marched over to the couch and flicked the arches of his feet.
He helped in surprise, using his miraculous abdominal muscles to haul his head up from the ground to glare at you. "Hey! Rude."
"Hey you," you snorted. You collapsed on the couch next to him. "And I am not boring. I just haven't hung out with you in a while solo."
Karina was going to visit her home in Gyeonggi-do for the week, so Felix had temporarily become your roommate. He didn't plan to visit Australia until summer break hit. It was just the two of you, but you were alright with that. You and Felix still worked at the café together anyway; it would just be fully you two for a week now.
Felix grumbled and pulled himself onto the couch to sit upright. "I know. You and Chenle are so busy being disgustingly in love. I mean, you can date someone and still hang out with your favorite Australian, can't you?"
"I think I like Chan better—I'msorrydon'thurtme!" You squealed, leaping from the couch when he feigned pouncing at you.
He settled in his spot again, pouting, but he reminded you of Mofy Duck as you looked at him. "But you and Chenle seem to be getting really serious though, yeah?"
You sat back down on the couch and sighed in content. "Yeah. I dunno, Lix. I think… you know—I'd spend my whole life with him."
"Really?" He pocketed his phone and so the two of you zoned into the conversation. "I mean, no, that's fantastic. It's great, Yn. And I'm so happy for you. I did not think that Chenle sauntering through the door of the café that day would end in something like this, but… I think it's beautiful, what you two have, I mean."
"Oh, thank you Lix. That means a lot." You pulled your knees up to your chest. "He really does saunter, huh."
Felix pressed his lips together, nodding. "He does."
You and Felix shared a laugh. You hoped Chenle was going to have a good time in Shanghai. In an hour, hopefully, you would receive word from him that he had safely landed.
—𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐗𝐕—
Chenle wanted to leave. He wanted to leave now.
There was nothing wrong with the city of Shanghai. God, he had missed this place, with all of the smells and sights and feelings. It was his childhood, where he had grown up. He would have loved to bring you here one day.
The plane had landed, safely and smoothly, as per usual. As soon as he had access to signal, he was shooting you text after text, before his family's hired security company was carting him off into a black SUV. He would have preferred to drive himself, but he supposed this allowed him to text back and forth with you.
He didn't want to give away his displeasure about being here to you, so he took pictures of the city sights he passed by, described any and all of the food smells he detected, and sent them all to you. It was like you were right next to him, experiencing all of this yourself. He knew it wouldn't live up to the real thing, but he would make do.
He knew he drew closer to the family apartments even before they got off the highway. He could feel the thrum of the coast, could see the grey sea in the distance, then the dark and cream tiled roofs of the apartments. They were built in a modern spin on traditional Chinese architecture, and they had become very familiar to Chenle.
The family apartments were not the typical apartment complexes like the one you lived in, but a row of small houses pressed up against each other to squeeze into the limited space of Shanghai's city limits. Each house-apartment was built with luxury and comfort in mind, however, and each apartment featured a connected backyard space that looked out at the sea view. Backyards were separated by large hedges for privacy, as well.
Chenle's foot hit the car floor rapidly as the car approached the first apartment. He didn't expect his parents to be waiting outside for his arrival or to be there at the airport to pick him up; he was hardly surprised at this point. It just made everything easier to swallow.
Bags were pulled out of the trunk, and Chenle reluctantly trudged up the steps into his family home.
It was just as he remembered: dark oak floors, traditional poetry and paintings hung on the walls, his mother's pet project Bonsai trees scattered about hallway tables. It was like walking through a time capsule; that was how stuck in the past his family was.
He feared a collision course with his family earlier than was necessary, and escaped up to his room where he could probably have at least a couple minutes of calm before the storm. Or, at least until Ningning came with Daegal. He grabbed his backpack and suitcase, then hightailed it up the stairs.
As he locked himself in his room, he felt his phone buzz to life once more.
鸡蛋: hey loser i'm almost there
鸡蛋: i think bb daegal can sense that she's going to c u
-
bbygrl: *image sent* here's my pet chick for the week
bbygrl: he says *i'm* the boring one 😒 and he fell asleep on the couch
bbygrl: u better send pics of daegal 🤨🔪
Chenle settled on the edge of his bed, still crisp and made from when he left. Nothing else had been touched over the course of the years he hadn't been here, but it was still nostalgic enough. All the posters of NBA players, the keyboard in the corner.
笨蛋: well i'm excited to see her too
笨蛋: and ig u too..
-
lele: jeez say pls first baby :/
lele: haha u should write loser on his forehead
bbygrl: i knew there was a reason y i liked u 😁
lele: uH HELLAUR??
There was a knock on the door. "Chenle xiansheng, Ning xiaojie has arrived."
He didn't recognize the voice from the other side, but figured his parents had hired a few more staff members for the household since he left. "Oh, uh, send her up, please. Thank you!"
The footsteps withdrew from the door, and Chenle set his phone on the bedside table.
He stood up, walking over to the floor to ceiling window that doubled as a balcony door. It looked out at the sea from here. Chenle braced his hand against the doorframe and gazed out. Maybe he should send you a picture of the waves as they pulled and pushed along the shoreline.
"Jesus, you look like you're in some bad C-drama." The door opened to his room without a knock, followed by the tap-tap-tap of little paws along wood and an ebullient bark. "That's the most excited she's been in awhile."
Chenle whirled around and knelt to the ground as a furry white blur came crashing into him. He chuckled, hugging Daegal to his chest as she lapped at his face. "Hi Daegal. I missed you," he cooed.
Ning Yizhuo, Chenle's cousin from Harbin, stood in the doorway with a smile on her face. Her long hair was dyed a fiery red, just like her attitude. While her parents were partners at Chenle's parents' company, she wouldn't get a piece of the pie due to "traditional" inheritance rules. It was stupid, but now, she modeled for luxury brands and designed her own clothes, too. Chenle might find her irritating at times, but he had always admired her strength and independence.
He raised his head up to her as he picked Daegal up in his arms. "Thanks for watching over her." His hand idly ran through her fur and scratched behind her ears.
Ningning nodded, shifting her weight from foot to foot. She closed his bedroom door behind her. "How's life, cousin? Seoul treating you well?"
"It's…" he sighed. "It's better than I could've ever imagined."
"That's good to hear," then she added, "I'm glad you've enjoyed your freedom."
Chenle's mood soured, and he set Daegal down. The dog scurried around his legs once or twice before giving up and running over to jump into his bed.
Ningning lowered onto the edge of his bed and massaged Daegal's stomach. "Sorry, that's probably a bad way to put it."
"No, it's all right. That's pretty much what it is, right?" He shook his head and picked up his phone again. He went back to the window and snapped a quick picture of the view to send to you.
lele: *image sent* it's prettier when it's sunny
bbygrl: it's still pretty when it's gray
lele: i think ur prettier anyway
bbygrl: always a flatterer aren't u?
lele: what can i say? give compliments where compliments r due ;)
"Does she make you happy?"
Chenle snapped out of her daze, the smile still evident on his face. "Huh?"
Ningning inclined her head to his phone. "I'm guessing that's your girlfriend. Or partner."
He worried his bottom lip between his teeth. "Yeah, she's… yeah. You better not—"
"I thought you knew me better than that, Chenle." She arched a brow at him in slight teasing. But there was that sadness in her eyes, too. Chenle knew why. Even if she wasn't getting her parents' company, she still had their name. She was subject to just about the same rules as he was.
"Right. Sorry."
"So what are you gonna do?" Ningning asked him. "You know that they're gonna make you meet her at least once while you're here. I bet they have some kind of dinner planned already."
That wasn't even a question in Chenle's mind. His five days here were going to be the busiest and most exhausting five days of his life, probably. He could see it now, meal after meeting after meal after meeting. His parents were going to soak the life out of him while they could. And then some.
Another knock on the door. "Chenle xiansheng, your parents would like to see you in their home office."
Chenle inwardly cursed. He'd hoped they would let him settle in first. "Hao ah, thank you. Give me five minutes."
Once the footsteps had left, Ningning brushed a hand over Daegal's coat. "Need moral support?"
"When do I not need moral support to talk to my parents?" He joked. Chenle slipped his phone into his pocket, scratched Daegal's head one more time, then left the room.
As he walked down the hallway and down the steps again toward his parents' home office, Chenle willed his heart to slow. His hands were even getting clammy and he wondered how he'd grown so soft in his time away that he was like a kid again in this house. Where was the spine he'd grown? He'd need it before facing the wolves this week.
Chenle brushed a hand through his hair as he stood before the engraved doors to the home office. It was in the shape of a circle, split directly down the middle. With a deep breath, he knocked on the door and pushed the doors open.
There were three people standing inside the office, surrounding the big mahogany desk at the far wall. He recognized his father in the office chair and his mother standing at his side. The young woman standing across from them was familiar, but he couldn't put a name to the face. Then again, there were very few options as to who she was racing through the forefront of his mind.
He had a sneaking suspicion.
"Ah, my son has finally graced us with his presence." His father did not stand, did not smile. "Close the door."
Say please. Chenle closed the door. As he approached slowly, his nod of greeting was more akin to a bow. "Fumuhao." (fùmù = formal word for parents; hǎo = a form of greeting lol idrk how to explain it)
"At least he has some manners left," his father commented.
Chenle's jaw clenched.
"Well," his father continued, "I suppose I should not dawdle any longer. Chenle, meet Miss Jin."
The young woman bowed shallowly to him in greeting and he returned the gesture. Her expression was the dictionary definition of polite.
"She's your fiancée."
—𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐗𝐕𝐈—
You felt like your stomach was about to explode. Dazed and half comatose, you reached for the remote and lowered the volume of whatever romcom was playing on the TV now. Felix's head was slumped over on the other side of the couch, light snores emitting from his parted lips. The smell of brownies filled and lingered in the apartment air, making you sigh in content. You wondered why Felix never started a brownie business.
You reached for your phone, which had been discarded on the couch cushions beside your body, and you picked it up. No messages, no missed calls. This had been the same thing for the past day and a half. Absolute radio silence from Chenle.
And you were… happy? At least, you thought you were, but only because this had to be an indication that he was having fun. Right?
You weren't too sure and you thought he would at least send you a check up message to assure you he was alive. This wasn't very… Chenle of him? But you didn't want to bother, and you had slowed down your messages for a bit.
You bit your lip, hesitantly typing out another few words to send.
you: hey honey just woke up from a post-brownie hangover lmao u really need to try lix's brownies
you: hope ur having fun over there! :) love you
"He still hasn't responded?"
You shook your head, as Felix drowsily pulled himself from dream land. His eyes fluttered and squinted to adjust to the light of the TV screen. The sky outside the apartment was dark, since the two of you had chosen to stay in this afternoon to make brownies. Then you both crashed in a food coma until now.
"He's probably just really busy," you told him, mainly trying to convince yourself. You feigned nonchalance as you tossed your phone back onto the couch and stood up. "Want some water? I think I need to flush out all the sugar I inhaled earlier," you mused.
Felix cleared his throat. "Oh, yeah. That's a good idea. Get me some please?"
"Sure." You pulled two glasses from the cabinet and filled them with water from the filtered dispenser into the fridge.
Felix called from the couch. "I think you got a message."
You nearly dropped both glasses right there.
He chuckled as you messily handed him both cups to pick up your phone.
lele: sorry i haven't been able to text u babe
lele: save some brownies for me tho 😞 love u too x
A smile bloomed on your face like the rising of the sun. He was okay.
you: dw abt it love! i'll c u in a few days x
You knew you probably wouldn't get a text back right away, but a girl could hope.
Felix noticed the shift in your mood. He scratched the side of his neck, peering down at his phone. "Chan's hosting a small get-together at his dorm. You think you're up for it? We don't have to go if you don't want to."
But you could see that Felix was itching to do something. And that he believed this might help you. It would do no good sitting around moping about your boyfriend who was gone. Where was your independent self now? You gave him a nod and stood up again, stretching your arms over your head. "Yeah, we can go. I'll go put on something presentable."
—𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐗𝐕𝐈𝐈—
The tie around Chenle's neck was practically a noose. He had a terrible feeling that if he wasn't on his toes, the fabric would tighten around his neck and keep squeezing. The sky outside his window was already dark like the abyss, meaning the charity gala being held here had begun. He could hear cars pulling up to the driveway and guests chattering below. His parents were supposed to be announcing his return soon, so he just bided his time upstairs until he was needed.
Somebody knocked gently on the door, and he was mentally preparing himself to be summoned downstairs.
"Chenle xiansheng, it's Jin xiaojie. Could I… speak with you for a moment?"
He couldn't tell if this was better or worse. But then again, the brief and polite conversations he'd had with Alice Jin over the past couple of days had been okay to say the least. She was quiet, not timid, but she didn't say anything that wasn't expected of her. He figured she was in the same boat as him.
"Uhm, yeah. You can come in." Chenle scratched the back of his neck instead of raking his hand through his freshly done hair. He stood awkwardly in the middle of his own childhood bedroom as he watched Alice slip inside and quietly close the door behind her.
She was pretty, actually. She had a heart shaped face and high cheekbones, with her dark hair partly pulled into an elegant hairdo. She wore an embroidered red qipao that accentuated her slim figure, but put her as the center of all of your parents' standards. It was no wonder they were so eager to welcome her to the family.
But he loved you, not her; he didn't even know her, other than their fates were inexplicably intertwined now.
"I'm going to speak freely," she told him, crossing her arms over her chest. "You and I both don't want this."
He huffed, leaning against the edge of his desk. "No kidding."
"But we have to." Those words settled uncomfortably in his chest. The truth was so difficult to swallow. "And we have to put on a show for those pigs out there, no matter what our true feelings are." She spat out the word pigs with the most emotion Chenle had ever experienced from her. It made him listen really closely.
Alice released a trembling breath. "My parents made me break up with my boyfriend for this, and I'm guessing you must have had a partner, too?"
"I still have one," he corrected. For now. Oh my god, he needed to text you back.
She pursed her lips. "Well, good for you, I guess."
He thought he heard bitterness in her tone, and maybe a hint of sadness. He felt guilt rise in his throat; she had already let go of her boyfriend, but he couldn't bring himself to let you go. He didn't want to, not yet. You were one of the best things that had happened to him.
"This is going to be weird for us, trust me, I know." Alice turned her gaze out to the window, staring out into the obsidian night sky and the infinitely dark sea. "But… I figured you could pretend I'm her, and I could pretend you're him."
Chenle rubbed a hand over his face. "Okay. Yeah, okay." He could do this. He could do this, right?
"They're gonna need us to come out soon. We need to be there when they announce our engagement anyway," she laughed wryly.
That made him pause. "Wait what? I thought they were just announcing my return?"
Alice furrowed her brows at him. "Surely you didn't just think that, Chenle? This isn't a charity gala; it's our engagement party."
Fucking hell. Chenle swore, wanting to scoop his eyeballs out. That meant there was press here specifically to report on how he had a fiancée. This was not good. He didn't know how he had convinced himself that the press wouldn't focus too much on him, but on the charity gala as per usual. He was a certified idiot.
"Chenle, you need to breathe."
He felt her hands planted firmly on his shoulders. She was standing too close, too close—
Alice backed away, apology in her eyes. "You really thought they wouldn't publicise it and hark on the opportunity?"
"I was optimistic." And stupid.
His phone buzzed.
"You should answer her," she told him, gesturing to his device on the nightstand. "But we need to go afterward."
He nodded and swiped his phone up. A small smile pulled at his lips as he read through the words you sent. He quickly sent back a couple messages, wishing he could see your face for some semblance of strength. When he was done, he left the phone on the nightstand again.
Chenle swallowed his pride and offered Alice his arm. She graciously linked her arm with his.
"Ready to go put on our first performance?" She asked. The smile on her face looked loving, but he saw the sad empathy in the fine lines.
He tried his best to return that expression, to channel as much love for you he had and to show that to her. "Ready as I'll ever be."
The two of them walked out of the bedroom together as staff rushed to and fro, hurrying past or allowing them to pass. They received compliments to their cleaned up appearances and elegance, and they accepted all of the comments with perfect decorum. As they were expected to do.
Alice suddenly stopped before they were about to round the corner to the stairway. Chenle could hear the sounds of chatter and laughter from downstairs.
"Oh, I almost forgot." She glanced up at him, murmuring softly with that same smile plastered on her face. "Did your parents give you the ring?"
"Ring?" Chenle didn't recall receiving one, but he patted down the pockets of his suit. He wasn't even surprised when he found a diamond ring in the top left inside pocket of his suit blazer. The massive rock glistened in the hallway lights. He imagined what it might have been like if he was putting the ring on your finger instead of hers.
The ring slipped onto Alice's ring finger perfectly. Like his parents had measured her finger to the millimeter and had been curated especially for her.
Alice tested the ring's weight, curling her fingers and examining the diamond's luster. "I once wanted to become a geologist when I was a kid."
"I wanted to be in the NBA," he chuckled. "Guess we all have dreams."
Alice considered him for a moment with a sideways smile. "We're gonna be okay, Chenle. We'll make it through tonight."
He nodded. "I know. Thanks." Just pretend it's Yn. You can do this, Chenle.
They returned their arms to each other, each taking a deep breath in. Then the two of them rounded the corner and met the wolves with blinding lights and pretty masks.
—𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐗𝐕𝐈𝐈𝐈—
Thursday morning, you woke up to the sound of murmuring outside your bedroom door. You groggily noted the sunlight streaming through your window and estimated that it was probably late afternoon. You and Felix had been out late last night at Bang Chan's apartment, playing Cards Against Humanity and bonding with a few of Chenle's basketball teammates, Felix's dance team, and others as well.
—Was that Karina's voice out there?
You tossed your covers back and stumbled out of your room, half dazed on sleep.
Karina and Felix were conversing at the kitchen counter, solemn expressions on their faces. Karina's suitcase sat by the door as if she had just gotten back from the airport. Felix buried his face into his hands and you wondered what was going on.
"Hey Karina, I didn't think you'd be back until later tonight," you said, shuffling over to hug your friend.
Karina hugged you tight. "Hey, Ynie. Yeah, I was supposed to fly in tonight, but… uhm, something came up." She exchanged a glance with Felix.
You frowned, looking between them. "Is everything okay?"
"Uh, yeah!" Felix stammered. "I was just talking to Karina about our work schedule for next week. Boss put me on extra hours."
You immediately frowned. "Wait what? Did he ask you beforehand?"
"No, but—"
"Let me talk to him," you offered, already hurrying back into your room to find your phone. "He knows you have a dance competition coming up."
Karina and Felix's faces drained of their blood and they chased after you, wide-eyed in panic. "Yn, wait! Don't look at your—phone…"
They stopped in the middle of your bedroom. You were hunched over your nightstand, nose deep in your phone. You were frozen, heart sinking into your stomach. Your phone had been blowing up while you were asleep with people sending you some clippings of some headlines. Most of the headlines were in Mandarin, but there were a couple in Korean.
"ZHONG CHENLE AND JIN ALICE: ENGAGED"
"ZHONG CORPORATIONS AND JIN TECH TO BE BROUGHT TOGETHER IN HOLY MATRIMONY"
"CHENLE & ALICE: READ ALL ABOUT THEIR LOVE EXPRESSED AT THEIR ENGAGEMENT PARTY"
You could feel arms around you, holding you close against their chest. Then another set pulling you toward them, too. Was this real? It had to be, right? There were too many different sources that it couldn't have been fake. And too many people had sent it to her, asking about your relationship and if you were aware.
No, you weren't aware.
Goddamn, how could you have known? Just last night, you thought you were still in a loving, healthy relationship. Now? Apparently your boyfriend was engaged to another woman.
The phone was wrenched from your fingers and you were guided to sit on your bed. Breathe, breathe, breathe—
"Yn? Honey, do you want some water? Some space?" Karina asked softly, kneeling down in front of you so she met your eyes.
You blankly shook your head, wiped your eyes. "I need to ask him—" You cleared your congested throat, "—I need to get a hold of him. I want to know how he's gonna explain this to me."
I want him to say it to my face.
Felix frowned sympathetically. "Yn, I don't think that's…"
"Lix, give her the phone, please," Karina said. She held out her hand and Felix placed the device into her palm. She passed it to you and monitored you as you furiously pulled up his text message chain.
you: hey can we talk? pls?
you: I just want to know what's going on I'm so confused
you: if u want to break up w me, have some dignity and do it to my face
You trembled as a response came in, but you couldn't tell if it was from anger, sadness, panic, or all three.
lele: don't contact this number anymore
Then he blocked you.
—𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐗𝐈𝐗—
You were probably insane, but at this exact moment in time, you convinced yourself that you were in the right. You deserved closure. And if Zhong Chenle lacked the balls to come to you and explain it to you himself, then you would march right up to his stupid penthouse apartment and give him a piece of your goddamn mind.
Chenle had been back from Shanghai for the past two days—it was currently the Monday after spring break. There had been nothing from him, as you expected. You were bound to take matters into your own hands to see exactly what went wrong. A handful of Chenle's friends who you had got acquainted with like Park Jisung and Jung Sungchan had reached out to you. They were really nice about it all, but couldn't offer any more information than you already knew. It seemed like no one knew what the hell was going on except for Chenle.
As a now engaged man—you thought of that title bitterly—he probably had the whole world's eyes on him. If he went to see you, everyone would pounce on the opportunity at a scandal. It was a disaster in the making. But maybe you needed a disaster. You'd felt far too helpless lately.
The doorman at Chenle's apartment greeted you warmly, and you made sure to wish him well. After all, he wasn't the one who deserved your wrath.
As you rose up in the elevator, you drummed your fingers nervously against the seam of your jeans. You had been rehearsing what you were gonna say ever since you woke up this morning, ready to hurt someone. You were adamant about getting your closure, and you knew Chenle didn't have classes until noon. So that gave you three hours to get shit settled.
The elevator arrived with a cheerful and metallic ding on his floor.
"Hello? Who—oh."
There he was, standing in slippers and his pajamas in the middle of the living room. He seemed surprised to see you for a moment, but that emotion vanished in an instant. You didn't recognize this Chenle. Fundamentally, nothing had changed about him, but you felt the shift. You felt the discomfort and tension, worse than it was at the Championship game. (That felt so long ago now.)
"How the hell did you get in?" He asked you, crossing his arms over his chest.
You stepped into the living room, not moving a step closer to him. This—this felt weird. Shouldn't the doorman have forewarned him you were on your way up? "The doorman, obviously. We need to talk."
"We're talking."
You know what? Screw the script. "What happened, Lele? What happened in Shanghai, what happened to us, what—"
"What do you mean 'us', Yn?" His tone made you start. "Can't you take a hint? I'm engaged to another woman, and you're just talking about the past?"
Your nostrils flared. "You mean the past that was literally a day beforehand? Chenle, what the hell? You don't even have the fucking decency to say you're sorry, but to block me without an explanation."
He rolled his eyes, like he had better things to do than to have this conversation with you. "You're really stupid, you know?"
"What?"
"You're really stupid." He tucked his hands into his pants pockets now, stance casual and gaze calculating. "You haven't figured it out yet?"
You wished you could speak. Fuck, you wished you could get words out.
"You were just a distraction, Yn. Just someone to have fun with before I needed to take over my responsibilities at the company."
You couldn't breathe. "Just a distraction."
He laughed, cruel and dark and wry. This was not your Chenle. But did your Chenle even exist? "You really thought I would keep you around? I have greater things in life than all this here in Seoul." Greater things than you, he seemed to say.
Wounded and heartbroken, you mustered all of your energy toward not crying or showing weakness. You held your head up high. "Guess you're even worse than the rumors say you are," you told him as calmly as you could. "Congrats on your engagement, and congrats on somehow living with such a shit personality. Have a nice, fake life."
You turned away and jammed the elevator button, willing it to come fetch you. Neither you nor Chenle said anything else as you left the penthouse. But as soon as the doors closed, your body shook so hard you fell against the wall, and you couldn't hold back the flood anymore.
Distraction. You were just a distraction.
For Chenle, the world was crashing down around him—walls crumbling, gravity flipping upside down. You had left with a stinging remark, and he couldn't bring himself to insult you anymore as you left. He was already breaking down as it was, collapsing onto the couch and trying to keep tears at bay.
How could he forgive himself for hurting you like that?
"You're a fucking dumbass."
"How could you talk to her like that? Don't you have any compassion?"
Chenle could feel Jisung and Sungchan practically run into the living room from his inner bedroom, where they had been hiding when you came in. He wouldn't have been able to do all that if it was in front of his friends, which was pretty pathetic of him, but he knew they heard everything. And they were rightfully furious at him for it.
Jisung planted himself on the glass coffee table in front of him, barely concealed rage on his face. "Have you any decency? Why the hell are you fucking crying when you just talked to her like that?"
Sungchan stood beside Jisung, arms crossed over his chest. "C'mon, Chenle. Aren't you gonna at least try to defend yourself? That was some pretty messed up shit you told her."
"I know," he croaked. Was it hot in here? "I was going to explain it all before she got here, but…" Well, you had gotten here before he could.
"So then explain," Jisung demanded. "You go to Shanghai for five days and all of a sudden you're engaged to some woman none of us know, you're acting like a douchebag, and you break Yn's heart. You told us yourself that you loved her. What the hell happened?"
Sungchan set a hand on Jisung's shoulder. "Jisungie-ah, calm down a little. Let's hear what he has to say."
They looked at Chenle.
Chenle leaned back against the couch cushions, eyes red with unshed tears. "My parents had my life planned out since I was born. Since I'm inheriting an empire, they had to ensure the future of it was in the right hands. Which also meant that they were going to pick who I married. They told me before I left for college here that I had a fiancée already and to keep that in mind, or some shit. I've been trying to avoid it, but it came to bite me in the ass when I met Yn.
"They basically threatened to disown me if I didn't fly back home and meet my alleged fiancée. And as much as I despise my parents for all the shit they've given me, I don't…" he struggled to find the words. "I don't want…"
Sungchan's expression was understanding. "You don't want to be without family. You still want that bond and you don't want to let people down, but you have to."
Chenle made a sad, noncommittal wave of his hand. "Yeah. That."
Jisung started at the floor, lips parted. "I'm sorry for going off on you like that. And I'm so sorry that you have to deal with this. But what you said was so brash—"
"Jisung, trust me, I know." Chenle let the emotion roll down his cheeks. He couldn't bottle it up any longer. "I want to throw up right now just thinking about what I said to her."
"Make it right, then."
"I'll have my ass beat if my parents hear. Everyone is watching me now. It's better if she leaves and never looks back." The press were harking for a scandal. If he so much as looked in your direction again in public, he was going to get a strongly worded warning from his parents. He was in a bind, and he didn't know what to do anymore.
—𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐗𝐗—
Five days later, you were very close to committing murder.
You had managed to fool everyone, and even yourself, for a couple days that you were handling the breakup fine. You had gotten closure, and that had allowed you to scream and yell and cry it all out. But then you went right back to normal, albeit a little more of a workaholic than you used to be. Renjun and Doyoung were frequent visitors to your office and often had to drag you out by your ear. Felix forced you to make drinks and pastries while he dealt with customers at the café, probably for fear you would either snap or break down.
And you were fine. You were doing fine, you really were.
Until you were walking across campus to the library and heard the whispering, saw the pointing. And watched as Chenle and his fiancée walked arm in arm down the sidewalk toward you. You almost broke down on the spot, your legs were shaking so badly.
You made eye contact with Chenle for a split second, before you were speed walking past them, like you were never there in the first place. They had looked… content. And you wanted so badly to be happy for him, and to move the fuck on.
But that was just wishful thinking. Like you wishing this was all a fever dream or a misunderstanding.
Instead, everything you had experienced with Chenle felt like a mirage. All of it—had all of it been fake?
Today at the café, it was just you. Felix had a dance competition and Karina was on her way, but she wouldn't be here until later. You were slouched over the coffee machine, waiting for the cup to fill up.
"Hey, uhm, Yn."
"Hm?"
Liu Yangyang winced as he leaned over the counter, afraid to set you off. He didn't want you crying again; he hated when you cried, because he never knew how to help. "The coffee's spilling over."
You cursed, looking down. Indeed, dark bitter brew sloshed over the sides and onto your shoes. It stained your already dirty sneakers a dreadful dark brown. You groaned, smacking your palm against your forehead. "Damn it. Sorry Yangyang."
The man bit his lip. He knew you were struggling, and he felt bad that he needed coffee all the time. "It's okay. I can still drink that."
The coffee burned your fingers as you carefully slapped a lid on it and handed it to him. "I'm so sorry; I'm literally a mess right now."
"Take a break," he pleaded softly. He usually sat in the corner of the café on his laptop to do his work, but recently, he had moved up to the counter to monitor you. "Yn, please. No one's here; you can take a break. Come sit and talk to me."
He pouted at your hesitation. "I'm lonely."
You rolled your eyes, but wiped your hands on a towel and made your way around the counter. He grinned in utter delight (and relief) as you slid onto the open stool next to him.
Yangyang leaned his cheek against his fist as he looked at you—really looked at you. "Talk to me. Spill it all out; I can take it."
"I uhm…" you wrung your hands together. "I saw him." You struggled to swallow, already feeling your nose begin to sting. "I saw him walking on campus with her. I dunno why she's here, but she is and I—" a shudder quaked through your body and Yangyang frowned. "I thought I was gonna fall over, Yang, that's how badly I was shaking.
"God, I love him so much and it hurts so bad. I wish I could just stay mad at him, but all I feel is sorry. Sorry for myself, sorry for him, sorry for… I don't even know." You threw your hands in the air and let them flop onto your legs.
Yangyang scrunched his brows. "Why do you feel sorry for him? From what I heard, he's the one who should be sorry."
You shrugged. "I have a feeling this is arranged. Maybe he feels trapped; maybe he doesn't. Yeah, he was a jerk about it, but the more I think about it, the more I feel sorry for him. He has to live with himself like that. I don't even know if he's happy."
"You're so…" Yangyang tugged at the strands of his hair. "Why are you so nice?"
"Huh?"
"Why are you so nice!" He repeated in indignation, hands thrusted out for effect. "You said it yourself—he was a jerk about it, and yet, you want him to be happy. I demand whipped cream and sprinkles on my cold brew, and you say 'okay, that'll be 6,000 won'. I don't understand you."
You didn't know how he did it, but you were smiling, and then you were laughing.
Yangyang continued his little ruse, with even more dramatised movements. "And even like five minutes ago! You were gonna redo my entire cup of coffee, and you're still here instead of getting some other person to fill your hours for you. God, can you stop being such a good person?"
You sniffled, smiling down at the café counter. "Thanks, Yangyang. You're really good at this, y'know."
He shook his head, but the tips of his ears were turning pink. "Nah. I'm just a clown." He brought his cup to his mouth and took a grimacing sip. "Jesus, this is foul. Why am I even drinking this?"
"You ordered it, dumbass," you deadpanned.
He whined, "Well—I thought it was really easy for you to make, so I ordered it! I didn't want you to have to work too hard, but it still tastes like trash." He gagged, tongue hanging out of his mouth. "Ugh, I need a whole can of whipped cream after this one. I—"
The door to the café slammed closed, and your soul nearly left your body. Standing there in all his glory was Chenle. He had a glare fixed on you and Yangyang, and you couldn't tell how to feel about it. Yangyang, in classic Yangyang fashion, glared back.
You sighed, quickly heading for the counter as Chenle strode over to it. You grabbed the pencil from behind your ear and twirled it nervously between your fingers as the touchscreen loaded up. "Hi, um, dark coffee?"
Chenle nodded, pulling out his wallet. "Yeah, and an iced green tea, please." He wordlessly handed you, not a black card, but a regular old visa.
You didn't think much of it, but you grabbed it and quickly inserted the chip into the reader after inputting the order. So she drinks green tea, huh? "Here you go. Your order will be called shortly."
Without waiting for his reply, you scurried over to the counter against the far wall and began preparing his order. You wondered why he hadn't brought his fiancée along with him, but then again, did you want him to? You supposed this was better, but it was still killing you inside. You wanted the old Chenle back.
When you were finished, your voice was embarrassingly soft as you called his name. Chenle took the cups from you, fingers brushing against yours.
You were ready to turn away, to pretend he didn't exist, when he stopped you short. "Yn."
You hated how hopeful you were. Absolutely hated yourself for it. All he would do would break you some more.
You watched his Adam's apple bob in a rough swallow. "I'm sorry."
Yangyang nearly toppled over his stool as he lurched to his feet. "You have no fucking right—"
"Hey, stop it." You gave Yangyang an earnest look, pleading him to back down.
"But Yn!"
You shook your head firmly. This wasn't worth it. With a flick of your arm toward the door, you addressed Chenle. "I think you should leave."
His gaze lingered on you for a moment, but he surrendered, and left the shop.
For a moment or two, you and Yangyang were quiet. The only noises were coming from the speaker's overhead playing lo-fi music. You focused on your breathing: in for three, hold for three, out for three.
I'm sorry. Did he even mean it? You were just a distraction.
"Yn," Yangyang muttered. "What the fuck was that?"
"You think I know?" You tugged a towel from your waist apron and turned your back to him to start wiping down the counter you had spilled coffee all over. You needed to grab a mop, too, for the mess you'd made on the floor. You felt Yangyang's eyes on you for a while, but he must have given up after a few minutes.
Or he must have realized you couldn't face him after what happened. Because no matter what Zhong Chenle did or said, you would still be so pathetically in love with him.
—𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐗𝐗𝐈—
Summer hit you like a basketball in the face. With classes out of session for the break, you dove headfirst into your work either at the theater or at the café. You worked overtime, you took people's shifts, you worked until you wanted to cry and pass out.
You had accepted a lot of things. It would be a long time before you were okay again, but you were a patient person. Your friends—Felix, Karina, Yangyang, Renjun—all tried in their own special ways to make you feel better and to keep you in check. They dragged you out for karaoke, for BBQ, for impulsive shopping trips. They made you feel like yourself again, from before you met the man you had fallen so fast and hard for.
Those feelings, unfortunately, would never fade. And even if you still couldn't stand seeing articles about them, you knew you were slowly accepting it. Because you were never meant to be with him. Perhaps you were soulmates, but this wasn't the lifetime that you would get the happy ending. And some days, you wanted to commit crimes because you were so fucking pissed, but you were learning to live with it all.
It was late when you finally made your way to the backdoor of the performing arts buildings. You knew Renjun would kill you if he knew you came back, but you just remembered that you forgot your phone on your office desk.
Your paces were fast as you unlocked the theater door and let yourself in.
It was déjà vu.
The melodious sound of piano keys being played met your ears as they drifted out into the back hallway. The notes and melody were a familiar sound, and you suddenly felt a wave of emotion crash over you in a tsunami wave. You could remove that night like it was yesterday.
You slowly and quietly traced your steps to the backstage door to the theater. It was cracked open, just like that night, except you remember you had locked that when you'd left. He must have picked the lock or something.
Gently, you pushed the door open.
He had his head bowed over the keys of the piano as he played. His fingers danced as they pressed keys, like they had been made to play.
A week ago, you and Doyoung had decided to move the piano. The two of you had turned it around, so now, the bench and keys faced the door. So you watched his perfect posture, upper body clad in a regular old black hoodie.
"You're not supposed to be here."
His shoulders stiffened slightly, but he brought his fingers to a slow halt. "Sorry," he cleared his throat, "I… didn't think anyone was here."
He had picked the lock. He really didn't think anyone would be here.
You dared a step closer. "Chenle," you sighed, "what are you doing here? You have a piano in your apartment."
Chenle pulled his legs over the side of the bench so he faced you now. You could see the lines on his face under the dim light of the lightbulb, the roughness from stress and lack of sleep. It worried you to see him in such a state, such misery. But then you reminded yourself of his words to you and how it had all played out. He was the one who had broken your heart and smashed it into pieces, and left you to pick up the broken pieces. He had promised you the world—and you had been stupid enough to believe him.
"I—" he paused, "I don't even know. Yn, I don't even know why I'm here. I just needed to get out of the apartment and…" He halted on his words, thinking better than to repeat them.
Distract himself. Yeah, you figured.
You were tempted to tell him to go distract himself elsewhere, but you couldn't bring yourself to. You didn't want your sanctuary tainted by his memory.
You didn't know what you were doing and why you were doing it, but your feet carried you over to the piano bench and you sat down next to him. You felt the heat of his arm and leg by yours, wondered how easy it would be to be pressed up against him again. How good it would feel to have him in your arms for just one last time.
"How are you?" You suddenly asked. "How've you been?"
He tapped his fingers against his knee. "Really bad, honestly. How about you? You look happy with, uhm, Yangyang. I'm glad."
You shook your head. "We're just friends." Because you ruined everyone else for me.
"He makes you smile—"
"So did you."
Silence. Your heartbeat thundered loudly in your ears and you wondered again why he was here. Why he was tormenting you like this. Couldn't he ruin your life once and deem it over?
"You don't have to accept my apology," he started again. "You don't have to even listen to me right now, but I'm so sorry, Yn."
You didn't want to listen, but you did.
"I'm sorry," he croaked. "Everything I said—I hate myself for every word I said to you that day. Because all I wanted to say to you was that the engagement is a scam and I don't love Alice, and never will love her—not like I love you. Because what we had was the realest thing I have ever had in my life and I wish we had more time."
When you didn't respond, Chenle said, "It's no excuse. They threatened to disown me, and I didn't know how to tell you because I really am just a coward and a scared, little kid. And… you brought the best out of me, the best memories I will ever have in my life. And I'm just so sorry.
"You were never just a distraction, Yn," he rasped, "you were so real to me. I was trying to push you away, but… I wanted—still want—to spend the rest of my life with you. And I know you'd probably never take me back, but I'm trying to find a way out of this."
You stared at the black stage floor, licking your lips. Your hands were shaking. "You're wrong." You inhaled softly, breathed it out. "I would take you back—in a heartbeat. But Chenle, if you ever find a way out of this…"
The two of you looked at each other then, eyes finally clashing and colliding in an explosion akin to that of a dying star. Your love had burned bright and burned fast.
"It won't be easy. I won't make it easy."
Chenle smiled then through his silver-lined eyes. "I wouldn't expect anything less from you. I'll win you back. I promise."
Something settled in your chest, like the calming of waves. They smoothed out, brushed against the shoreline, but they didn't kick up in the winds anymore. This—this was the closure you needed. It was not whatever that screaming match of insults had been, but this.
"Can I… can I hold you? Just one more time."
You pursed your lips to suppress your bottom lip's trembling as you nodded.
Chenle leaned toward you and wrapped his arms securely around your body. He tugged you closer, and you leaned into his familiar and comforting embrace. You inhaled the smell of his cologne and allowed all of him to engulf and overwhelm your senses. You let his hands hold you tight, let him memorize your every curve and edge and inch.
And as you and Chenle sat there in silence together, you thought about how the boy who had everything had loved too hard and lost it all. But in his actions, there were about a thousand unspoken words, and for now, that would be enough.
"Thank you," he whispered into your hairline, lips pressed to your head and tears in his voice, "for everything."
You squeezed his hand. "You don't ever have to thank me for loving you, Chenle."
ending credits/aka my condolences: sorry chenle, i mayhaps did u dirty, but lmk what u guys think 😌💀
#nct x reader#zhong chenle x reader#chenle x reader#nct dream x reader#nct dream#nct#nct angst#chenle angst#chenle fluff#nct chenle#nct oneshot#nct dream oneshots#nct dream angst#chenle oneshot
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・❥・When they find out you're lacking motivation
╰┈➤ Synopsis-- You we're struggling to even get out of bed in the mornings. You were rapidly losing motivation and didn't know what to do. That's when these characters heard what was happening and came to see if you were okay.
╰┈➤ Gender neutral reader
╰┈➤ Venti , Albedo , Kazuha , Ayaka , Keqing , Diluc , Heizou , Kokomi , Yae , Ei
╰┈➤ Warnings -- being depressed , lacking motivation.
: ̗̀➛ Venti was very quick to catch on. Cmon, He's the anemo archon. He's been alive for a while and he knows what it means when somebody won't leave their home for a prolonged amount of time.
: ̗̀➛ He immediately thinks to go to your home to check in on you. He brings some food because he suspects all you've eaten was junk for the past week or two. He gets your favorite dish from Great Hunter and then goes to see you.
: ̗̀➛ When he gets there, he sits you up in your bed and gives you your dish and asks what's wrong.
: ̗̀➛ "Oh, my dearest friend, what's wrong? You can tell me anything and I promise I'll help as much as I can. Believe me!"
'*•.¸♡ ♡¸.•*'
: ̗̀➛ Albedo notices how whenever he hung out with you at your home, you seemed sluggish and didn't really speak as much.
: ̗̀➛ Believe it or not, He's really good at psychology and reading people. He didn't have to be a genius to know something was up, but he couldn't just ask infront of everyone. He didn't want you to feel embarrassed.
: ̗̀➛ He invites you to a secluded area with pretty scenery. When you both get there, he starts asking questions such as "Are you okay?" and "Do you need to talk?"
: ̗̀➛ Though he can't understand others emotions well, it doesn't mean he doesn't know how to cheer someone up. He lets you lean on his shoulder and talk about how you feel and responds with an occasional nod, not wanting to interrupt.
: ̗̀➛ "I see.. I'm glad you came out here. It must've been difficult. I promise to invite you on these kinds of trips more often so you have a reason to get out of bed. How does that sound?"
'*•.¸♡ ♡¸.•*'
: ̗̀➛ Kazuha was staying in your home with you for a short break in his traveling. He wanted not only to avoid the bad weather and pain of camping outdoors, but also to see you.
: ̗̀➛ He noticed how you were not really up to do the things he suggested you both did and got concerned, especially when you said you weren't feeling well enough to go on a date with him at the fanciest restaurant that you had loved.
: ̗̀➛ Like the gentleman he his, he brought you flowers and a card and left it on your bed when you were getting food, and when you returned to your bed, he hugged you tightly.
: ̗̀➛ "If there's anything I could do for you, please let me know. I don't want you in low spirits" he had spoken softly, even softer than usual. He didn't want to catch you off guard. On the contrary, he wanted to gladden you.
'*•.¸♡ ♡¸.•*'
: ̗̀➛ Ayaka is extremely familiar with the feeling of being unmotivated. She had dealt with the feeling herself, especially after her parents passing. Ayato had taught her coping skills, and she was able to visit your estate and help teach you what she was taught years before.
: ̗̀➛ She would go to your home everyday and sit and talk to you. She'd teach you how to cope in a healthy way and she'd slowly start getting you out of bed and help you clean around your home and supported you taking breaks every so often
: ̗̀➛ If you ever had some sort of setback, she'd remind you that setbacks are normal and not to get angry at yourself for it. On the more tough days, she'd bring you some snacks prepared by Thoma and sing you to sleep.
: ̗̀➛ "I am so proud of you. Even if you don't get out of bed for a few days. I'm here for you and so many others are too! Please don't beat yourself up over this."
'*•.¸♡ ♡¸.•*'
: ̗̀➛ Though it may seem Keqing is always swamped with work, she could never forget about you or not notice when something is up.
: ̗̀➛ She would most likely be the first to notice if you didn't leave the house for a day. She would find out by asking citizens if they've seen you. After hearing they haven't seen you in a while, she rushes to your house.
: ̗̀➛ When she finds you, she gets pretty angry. Not at you, but at herself. She wishes she could've seen the signs and maybe that if she wasn't always working she could've prevented this.
: ̗̀➛ She goes to your kitchen and makes some homemade soup for you and got you some water and then sat down with you and let you talk about how you felt whenever you were ready.
: ̗̀➛ "It's okay if you need to talk, but also okay if you're not ready to just yet. I miss you and I hope to see you tomorrow if that'd be alright. If you don't feel up for it, i'll come back everyday for you."
'*•.¸♡ ♡¸.•*'
: ̗̀➛ Diluc had been thinking of you all day. He wished to get out of the Angel's Share sooner, but he was stuck there because of a drunk bard who hadn't paid just yet.
: ̗̀➛ As soon as he gets off work, he heads straight to your home with your favorite drink, just as a greeting gift.
: ̗̀➛ When he walked in, he noticed how you hadn't done laundry in weeks and you were still in bed, even though it was far past noon.
: ̗̀➛ He doesn't really know the best way to approach the situation, so he just goes off his gut.
: ̗̀➛ "I got a bottle of your favorite drink, but it seems you are upset. Allow me to listen to what's wrong and i'll get you a glass."
'*•.¸♡ ♡¸.•*'
: ̗̀➛ Heizou's intuition immediately told him something was up the second you felt your motivation go down the drain. His intuition said to go check on you. Though he may have been in the middle of investigating a case, he left it all to see you.
: ̗̀➛ He had no idea what he would walk in on, but he did notice how you'd been a bit under the weather lately and he starting assuming the worst.
: ̗̀➛ Heizou burst through your door and ran up to your room, just to find you in the fetal position on your bed, crying.
: ̗̀➛ When he saw you, his body physically jolted. He was glad you were alive, but he didn't know what to do. His adrenaline was through the roof.
: ̗̀➛ He rushed by your side and hugged you and allowed you to cry on his shoulder, not caring if it got his shirt wet. All he cared about in that moment was you and nothing else. He would never admit it, but he shed a tear or two in that moment. Seeing somebody so vulnerable made him so upset, especially since it was you.
: ̗̀➛ "Please. Allow me to help. I can't have you go through this. I can't even begin to imagine how painful it's been and i'm sorry I haven't been there for you as much as I could've. I'm so sorry." He basically muttered that into your ear and he started crying with you.
'*•.¸♡ ♡¸.•*'
: ̗̀➛ Kokomi had a really long day that she never really signed up for. She had so much to do that she was free to go to her own home past 10 PM, but she went to see you first to say goodnight, but also to check on you. She usually sees you during her day, but she didnt, which she thought was odd.
: ̗̀➛ When she saw your expression, she knew exactly what you were thinking. She invited herself into your room and sat down gently on your bed.
: ̗̀➛ She offered to do anything and offered for you to talk to her about what you had been going through and overthinking.
: ̗̀➛ After letting you speak what was on your mind, she offered to you to write down your thoughts, just like how she does. She said how it makes her feel calmer and get out her emotions and that you should try it sometime.
: ̗̀➛ "Even if I'm busy at work, please come see me sometime. I'd love to see you anytime."
'*•.¸♡ ♡¸.•*'
: ̗̀➛ Yae pretty much knew all along what you were feeling and thinking, she was just waiting for you to speak up to her and say what was on your mind.
: ̗̀➛ When she realized you'd never do that, she caved and went to your home, knowing exactly where in your house you'd be.
: ̗̀➛ She picked up some light novels for you to read and some tea to drink that'd give you some energy and hopefully snap you out of your current state.
: ̗̀➛ "Ah, my beautiful mortal friend. Human lives are too short to be thinking about this kind of stuff. You should be out there exploring the world and making memories along the way. There's so much stuff I can think of that you'd love. If you never leave home, you may never find that out. Cmon, when you're done with the tea, follow me to Narukami Shrine. I promise a short visit will be worthwhile."
'*•.¸♡ ♡¸.•*'
: ̗̀➛ Ei never really understood why humans felt such a way, but when she realized that's how you felt, she read dozens of books on the topic to find out what she should do.
: ̗̀➛ Once she was well read on the topic, she went to go visit your home. She couldn't admit it but she was incredibly nervous. She brought some sweets with her that she got from some local food stands in Inazuma to give to you.
: ̗̀➛ When she arrived, she got incredibly upset seeing how bad it had gotten. She gave you the desserts and sat down beside you, not saying a word. She wanted you to speak whenever you were ready for her to know.
: ̗̀➛ She gently rubbed your back the entire time and didn't leave until around midnight. She came to see you for multiple hours a day just to make sure you're getting better. Each time, she'd bring something new for you to try and she'd try to convince you to come out into the world so she can try all of it with you.
: ̗̀➛ "Take your time, but I would love to take you to a restaurant and order all your favorites. You need to be reminded how much life is worth, especially for a mortal human like you. You barely live 100 years so you need to get outside and do all the things you enjoy. I believe in you."
#genshin#genshin impact#genshin impact x reader#genshin x reader#genshin fluff#comfort#angst#venti#albedo#kazuha#ayaka#keqing#diluc#heizou#shikanoin heizou#kokomi#sanganomiya kokomi#yae#yae miko#raiden ei#ei#raiden shogun#genshin comfort#genshin angst#angst to fluff
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student evaluations
tw: mention of suicide, in the heat of the moment
the most dreaded time of the year, unless you're a genius like richie cameron
this is when parents would meet with their children's teachers and discuss the student's progress up until this point in the year
students would also get to see their parents during this time
of course, amelia, lacey, and richie saw their dad's everyday
lacey and richie liked seeing their mom
amelia... well—
todd didn't really like this time of the school year
most of his student's parents were snotty, just as his were
he didn't like saying his bad students were bad because he knew the ramifications of that
on the other hand, he would say his good students were good to the most hard-faced parents of all time
nothing was good enough for them
luckily, this year, he had a good group of students
(the lowest grade was a seventy-eight, but that's only because the student is rather forgetful
(todd knows that once she turns in her assignments, she'll easily get up to an eight-five))
and he knew a couple of the student's parents from when he was in school
namely knox overstreet and gerard pitts sr
and he had nothing but nice things to say about their boys
charlie came to todd's classroom on the first night of evaluations
"so, you're the student's teacher and you're her only parent... how do you have a conference?" he asks
"well, i know how well amelia is doing in my class, so... no need for an evaluation" todd says, standing from his desk "i was just about to come down to talk to you about her?"
"why"
"... because you have her as a student?"
"oh right"
there was nothing to worry about
amelia is a great student, high grade, great participation
"she doesn't mind telling people when they're wrong," charlie says
"typical"
"she really is great, you should be proud, mr anderson" charlie says, sticking his hand out, clearly trying to imitate a teacher they would have had
"i am, thanks," todd says, matching charlie by imitating how his father would have been and shaking his hand
"so..."
"so?"
"who was that in your shower the other night?"
todd caught a breath in his throat "charlie—"
"look, it's fine," charlie takes a seat on a student's desk "i'm not gonna tell anyone, no one would believe me anyway"
todd crosses his arms "that was my partner"
"partner?"
"boyfriend" todd barely says
he doesn't love the term boyfriend, now that he's in his late forties
sounds too juvenile
"mm, i didn't know you were dating"
"we've been together a while"
"amelia likes him?"
"yeah"
"good... well i have no complaints then"
"charlie—" todd heavily sighs
"cmon, todd, i'm just teasing you, what did you expect to happen when you showered with your boyfriend at the school you work at? by the way, incredibly not sexy"
"oh what would you have done? gone to the cave?"
charlie freezes, holding back that that's exactly what he would have done
"look, charlie, i know that you don't care, and frankly i don't think cameron would care, but there are people who work at this school, people who send their children to this school, and most importantly people who fund this school who wouldn't like if one of the teachers was dating a man, especially with the aids thing going on, so if for once you could keep your words to yourself, that'd be appreciated"
"jesus, todd, of course i'm not ratting you out, it's no one's business"
"good, cause it's not just him and i in danger, it's amelia too"
that shuts up charlie for a moment
"and i couldn't live with myself if anything happened to her..." todd says
"of course, your family's safe with me" charlie raises his right hand "dead poets honor"
it's awkward and quiet for a second before charlie's back on his bullshit again
"is he hot?"
todd laughs and rolls his eyes
"no, tell me, is he hot?"
"the hottest"
charlie laughs and cheers for todd
"will you get out? i have evaluations to do, and so do you"
anyway
stephanie's parents couldn't make it to evaluations
her dad, mr corporate, and her mom, puppy dog who's not allowed to make her own choices, had to see to a conference in montpeiler and wouldn't be back in time
sick
so, while all of her friends would be going out and spending time with their parents, she would be in her dorm... alone...
pittsie told her that mr overstreet invited him and his father to go out to dinner with him and evan
"i can tell him no, if you want"
"don't, go be with your dad"
she joked she would go hang out with mr dalton
amelia said that was the saddest thing she had ever heard
richie and lacey were going out with their mother, not with their father, who had to stay at school
(not that he would have gone anyway)
anyway, first night of evaluations went well!
after the second night, todd and amelia were going to go to a restaurant, and hopefully get through appetizers
amelia sat outside his classroom and waited
"did you survive?" she asks when he comes out of his classroom
todd chuckles "barely"
"do my teachers like me?"
"yes, they all sang their praises" todd wraps his arm around amelia's shoulders and pulls her closer "i'm very proud of you"
"uh-huh, whatever" but she likes hearing it "how were your friends"
"good, oddly formal"
"did they recognize you?"
todd thought back for a moment
knox did address me as mr anderson
just as they go around the corner, they find knox, evan, pitts sr, and pitts down the hall with none other than charles dalton
"todd anderson!!!" charlie yells
"oh good grief" todd says under his breath
todd and amelia meet up with the rest of the Dad Squad™
knox, mr lawyer, business suit, tall and slim, handsome, firmly shakes todd's hand
it takes knox a second to remember that amelia washed his car over the summer
"i don't trust anyone except amelia with my car"
evan, who had yet to get his learner's permit, knows that
pitts, survivor of the vietnam war, radio engineer, offers todd a half hug to stay balanced
he tells amelia that she looks just like her mother
amelia sees the contrast between knox and pitts sr
how knox deferred from the war and has a thriving career in nice suits and a nice car
and how pitts sr can barely stand anymore after supposedly fighting for his country
she doesn't blame mr pitts for going, he probably thought it was the right thing to do
but the way she saw it, young men went to vietnam to die
just like stephen meeks
and now mr pitts relies on his family to care for him and will never be comfortable again
it was just a little bit... funny
"why don't you two come out with us?" knox asks after some small talk
todd looks down at amelia, who looks up at him with eyes begging him to say no
"ah, no i'm sure your boys wouldn't want to go to dinner with their teacher"
"come on, toddy, you're a cool teacher" knox says
"we haven't seen you in ages" pitts reminds him, giving him big puppy eyes
"well—"
"i'll go change" amelia blurts "and we'll meet you out front"
ahaha that is not what i wanted to say
amelia spends her walk back to her dorm with her stomach in her throat
her hands clam up and she sweats despite it being fifty degrees outside
she gets back to her dorm, where stephanie sits at her desk typing up an essay at her typewriter
"how were your evals?" amelia asks looking in her closet
"my parents didn't come," stephanie says, voice hoarse
"why not?"
"busy"
amelia turns her attention to her friend "do you want to come out with us? i'm sure they can add an extra chair"
"i'm fine, thanks" stephanie speaks with force, as though someone's holding a gun to her head
"well, i don't want to leave you here alone"
stephanie whips around, amelia could finally see her eyes were red
"i'm not gonna kill myself, just go" she spat
amelia caught her breath
she stayed silent as she changed into trousers and a t-shirt and left the dorm without another word
great, how am i going to sit in front of my dad's friends and eat food after that?
she meets her dad in the front hall
now, todd's a good dad, a great one
he can always tell when something's off with his little girl
and as she walked down the steps from the girls' dorms, he could tell she was in an off-mood
"we don't have to go," he says "we don't even have to go out at this point"
"dad—"
"amelia..."
he pulled her in for a hug, stroking her head
"i don't want to push you, i know they're my friends, but they're strangers to you, they know a version of me that's been long gone"
"do you just not want me to hear embarrassing high school stories about you?" amelia says
todd chuckles and looks down at his beloved daughter
her perfect hazel eyes, round face, tight smile
"i think... um... i'll stay behind, but you go with your friends, catch up," amelia says
"are you sure? i don't have to"
"i'm sure, go" she walks to the steps and turns, just to see her stupid dad hadn't moved
"gooooo" she says, and she stands and waits for him to go out the door
"no amelia?" evan asks as todd approaches him and knox at knox's car
"nah, she's not feeling well" todd says lying
todd's still a terrible liar knox thinks
~
don't worry, more about this evening to come soon!
if you got this far, tell me your favorite part, and you get ten extra points today
taglist my beloveds thank u for ur support ily <3
(pls let me know if you want to be added or removed! you can reply or send me a dm if u prefer)
@chloe-octavia
@aedan-mills
@regina-della-poesia
@justarandompjofan
@sapphicnoel
@iguanamuppet
@maisietheweltoncow
@finding-an-angle
@srj901
#dps 2: electric boogaloo#dead poets society#see charlie hasn't changed that much lmao#tw suicide mention
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wait are requests still open im confused bout that and if they are open could you like do a scenario of like anything as long as it includes Mimic or Rappa suffering in some form (I dunno i just want them to suffer)
Just why? Rappa I can understand, but mimic as well? What did the poor dude did?
"I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD THIS IS THE LAST TIME WHERE I-"
"ShUT ThE HeLL Up PUNK anD Run For YouR MiSeRabLe LiFe!"
You flinched at hearing both mens shouts while shaking your head a bit.
You didn't had to be a genius to know that sometimes Rappa and Mimic screwed up a bit. Mimic was one of the two mens that your boyfriend trusted, yet he managed to slip a bit sometimes. Normal, he is human after all, but yet Chisaki was by far a merciful man. So any mistakes that he did were taken seriously.
Whille Rappa? You really needed to explain? Ever time that your boyfriend was fed up with precepts shit, that man was the most he spoke about. Kendo did almost everthing on purpose, irritating Overhaul just as a excuse to have another match with Chisaki.
Honestly? At first you had pity on him, but when he interrupted you and Chisaki once in your guys, ahem, little spare time together you just threw that feeling of empathy to the air... almost. Cmon, dying is already painful imagine more than five times in a roll.
Although... lately some precepts had started to do something that even if you liked to help, put you on a very uncomfortable situation ever since Dedoiro did it.
"THERE YOU FUCKING ARE!" Rappa shouted in almost relief as soon as he turned on a hall and spotted you, Mimic's eyes wide open.
"Eh?" Both of the men came almost in one blink of an eye to you.
"LISTEN WE DID SHIT AND OVERJERK IS HELLA PISSED AT US!" he grabbed onto your shoulders and shook you a bit, making you even dizzy.
"He IS FuckIng PiSSeD At ME BeCauSe YoU WerE The OnE SpeaKing ShiT ClosE To Me YoU sOn Of A-"
"Anyway." Rappa shaked you kore violently after that "FUCKING HELPS US (Y/N)!"
"StOp ShAkiNg OvErHauL's PaRtNEr YoU FuCkiNG IDioT!"
The man stopped his actions abruptly as your vision was almost dizzy, and you swore you were almost seing stars in front of you due to Rappa's violently shaking.
"Alright.." you placed your hand on your head with a grunt before blinking a couple of times, finally focusing on Mimic and Kendo "What did you two did?"
"HE fUcKinG DiD It!" Irinaka shouted in offense and disgust as Rappa shouted back at him to shut up.
"Listen. Just hide us, hell. Ficking talk to him cause he is-"
You yelped when the ground suddenly cracked and pressed both of them on the walls as a very psychotic Chisaki walked slowly towards the three of you.
"Get behind angel. Is going to become pretty dirty with trash around here." He said nonchantly, but his eyes shined the word 'murder' on those golden orbs.
"Woah woah woah!" You got in front of him with a worried expression "Love, I know you must be really angry right now-"
"Angry?" He asked almost too calm for your liking "No dearest, I'm not angry." He crouched down and touched again with his bare hand at the ground, making a spike of wood to appear and pierce right on Rappa's shoulder.
"I am infuriated." He said blantly as his wide open golden eyes glared at Rappa.
"Kai!" You shriek and kneeled in front of him to urge him up again "Heavens, why all of this?! Calm down!"
He glared at you before returning his gaze at both man pressed against the wall.
"You came asking for help. Didn't you two good for nothing?"
"So. Since (Y/n) is mostly the only one who can calm you down the- FUCK OKAY I GET IT!" Irinaka yelled at feeling the air of his lungs almost dissapear at how he was pressed even more between both concrete and wood.
"Kai..." you cooed worriedly as he scoffed "If thsi is about bussines give them a break... is not always that-"
"If this was about the yakusa I would have done much faster. But no. That thug said something that I want him to suffer before the darkness envelops his fucking trash of a soul." He said coldly, staring right on Rappa's face again
"And what does Mimic have to do with that?!"
Chisaki turned to you with a blank expression as he muttered 'he laughed'; making you deadpan right after it.
"What did you said this time?" You sighed at Rappa as he made a certain straggled yet fucked up sound as Mimic glared daggers at him with his wide eyes.
"Care me to say it?" Chisaki growled as he put more force on his quirk "That son of a bitch made comments about your appearance like I didn't even existed and dared to question on 'why the hell is such a hottie doing with the germophobic freak'." He lowered his voice even more and you looked at Rappa with a arched eyebrow.
"Seriously?" You asked in disbelief as both man rolled their eyes before you sighed and patted Chisaki's shoulder gently before kissing his ear "Have fun."
"Much." He mumbled back before his soft eyes only for you dissapeared and were replaced with his usual cold and pysothic ones.
"FucKing TrAitOr!"
You sighed while closing the door, muffling your ears with your hands at the shouts and the sounds of popping while you walked away.
You spotted Tengai and he seemed concerned about your expression, even asking you and offering his assistance.
"Thank you Tengai-san. But is nothing, really."
"If you say so...." you smiled flustered at how he bowed in respect to you before you did the same.
Right on time Chisaki blasted the door open, hives all over his face and forearms as he scrubbed furiously. Marching over you and grabbing your forearm, dragging you with him.
Tengai arched one eyebrow at the scene before he saw both Mimic and Rappa getting out with terrified expressions and he immediately put the pieces together.
"You two really need to stop speaking about master. On his house no less."
"We need a fucking break that's what we all need. A break from Overhaul sounds like-" and Rappa was punched by Mimic again, starting another discussion as Tengai could only sigh.
#overhaul x reader#overhaul scenario#fanfic overhaul#overhaul#chisaki kai imagine scenario#kai chisaki x reader#chisaki kai x reader#chisaki kai#kai chisaki#bnha imagine#bnha x reader#bnha characters#bnha villains#bnha#my writings#zuffer writimgs
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Dishonorable intentions. | Thomas Shelby x Reader Imagine.
Part II.
*Sidenotes: I was inspired and some anons asked me to do the second part of dishonorable intentions, soooo here it is! I’ve decided it’ll have more parts so hope you enjoy it.
*Resume: You and Tommy go on your first date.
Thomas lit another cigarette. Feeling the smoke in his lungs gave him a sense of calmness. A feeling he really needed in that exact moment. They were counted the times that Thomas Shelby had been nervous: when Hughes kidnapped Charlie, in the tunnels when he was in the war, in the birth of Charlie and Ruby and another time: when he saw YN for the very first time. YN in the war. YN as a nurse. He hit the cigarette again. Fuck. How long was she going to make him wait?
He wasn’t going to lie, he never thought a girl like YN would accept to go on a date with him. You could tell from miles away that they were completely different from the other.
First we have Thomas. The all mighty, Thomas Shelby. The son of an Irish immigrant man and a Romani gipsy woman, born and raced in Small Heath, Birmingham, England. He was in his late 30s about to jump to the 40s. A charmer by nature and way to intelligent for his time. A man who grew up without shoes to wear or food to eat, a man who growing up only had bread and lard when he dreamt and hoped that maybe one day, he’ll be able to do and have whatever he wanted. He worked hard until he created his own empire, but Tommy knew that no amount of money allows you to pass through the steel sheets that separates one class from another. He knew it cause he had lived it. But even when he born with nothing, he became one of the most powerful men in all Europe. He was brilliant, aggressive but rational, he knew what he wanted and he didn’t ask permission, he does what he wants and takes what he needs. A genius, a womanizer, millionaire, CEO of multiples business, philanthropist, and yet, he didn’t felt worthy of dating someone like YN. He dated Greta, Grace, May, Lizzie, Tatiana, Jessie, and many more, but he never felt unworthy to have them, to be with them. Only with YN.
And then we have YN. YN Casiraghi was born and raised in London. A 22 year old Heiress of one of the most influential and wealthiest families in Europe. YN was passionate about everything that could make her feel free and liberated. She loved to travel, to read, to study, to work, to learn. Her dream was to become an independent woman who didn’t have to depend of a man. YN was a free spirit. Determinate and stubborn, yet free and playful, flirty and seductive, intelligent and fearless. Growing up YN had everything she wanted or needed, she grew up being spoiled but never being a brat or a mean girl. She was a good girl and everyone wanted to be her or be with her. YN was special. Everyone loved YN, not just because she was beautiful and smart, a popular socialite who knew everyone and ruled every place she went to. They loved her because she was sweet, because she always tried to help, because she wasn’t selfish or shallow, because she cared.
YN Casiraghi and Thomas Shelby. When black meets white. When yin meets yan. When two worlds collide.
YN closed the door behind her, and with a smile she started to walk towards Tommy. . Thomas glanced toward the entrance of her house...and his mouth dries. She’s standing on the entrance, and for a second he doesn’t realize it’s her. She looked exquisite: her hair falls in soft waves to her breast on one side, and on the other it’s pinned back so it’s easier to see her delicate jawline and the gentle curve of her slender neck. She’s wearing high heels and a tight light blue dress that accentuates her alluring figure. Wow. Her lips in her classical red lipstick. A red that could drive any man crazy, including Thomas Shelby. The closer she was to him, the more his heart skipped a beat.
-Hi.-YN chuckled. Damn. Thomas Shelby looked way more handsome than he had years before when she last saw him.
-Hello love.-Tommy spoke after extinguish the fire of his cigar by throwing it away.-So, are you ready sweetheart?-He extended his hand so she could take it and help her get to the car.
-I’m YN, not your love and surely not your sweetheart, love.-The girl smiled one last time before she started walking to the Bentley parked in front of her house. She didn’t even waited for Thomas to open the door for her. She opened herself and got in the car. Thomas didn’t took long to follow. He started the car and away they go.
The ride was pretty fast before they arrived to the Hotel Café Royal, a place that both of them knew very well. It was an hotel where everyone who was a somebody hanged out.
Winston Churchill, Zelda and F. Scott Fitzgerald, Einstein, Henry Ford, George Washington, Charles Chaplin, Ernest Hemingway, Coco Chanel, you name it.
When YN got off the car, she couldn’t stop herself from rolling her eyes. It wasn’t funny anymore, almost every guy she went out on a date with, thought it was a great idea to have a first date in that same place. Every fucking time. When Tommy got to her side he put his hand in her waist, pushing a bit so she could start walking into the hotel. And YN could’ve sworn that electricity ran through her whole body. It wasn’t normal how nervous he could make her with a simple gesture.
-Cmon lov... YN.-Tommy killed a smile that was starting to appear on his face. She was something else. She reminded him of Dangerous, one of his most loving horses, she wasn’t scared to take what she wanted, she wasn’t afraid to do whatever that would please her, cause if freedom could be a person, it would be YN.
The both entered to the Oscar Wilde salon, filled with aristocrats and important people who tried to impress each other. The hostess and a waiter took YN and Thomas to their table, the best table in the whole place. A table with a view. YN was a sucker for a killer view, but at the end of the day, it was a view she knew way to well.
-Here you go Mr. Shelby and Mrs. Casiraghi. So, can I bring you something to drink?-The young man asked with a smile, you could tell the poor thing was really nervous. He has to serve two of the most important clients of the Hotel.
-I’ll have a glass of Sancerre.-The girl spoke with confidence, after turning his gaze to the blue eyed.
-I’ll have a whiskey. Irish.-The kid left as quickly as possible, trying to bring their drinks asap. Thomas got closer to her. -You look stunning.- He said in a whisper, and kissed her cheek. Closing his eyes, Him savoring her scent; she smelled heavenly. It didn’t took long before YN started to blush, she was very used to men giving her compliments of all kind, but there was something in the way Thomas did it that drove her crazy.
-You look pretty good too, I’m glad to see you in one piece, I’ll admit that the last time I saw you, I didn’t though you’ll make it.-She spoke with clarity, something that Tommy was starting to appreciate. Tommy chuckled, even when he was pretty used to having a poker face and nothing and no one surprised him, she did. She was something different. -So how did you found me? And what took you so long?
A smile appeared on Tommy and a minute later, the drinks were in their hands.
-Well, well, you play no games, don’t you?... When I finally went back to Birmingham, where I’m from, I wasn’t the man you met. Everything changed in me. I became a different man, all my believes, my ideas, my feelings and emotions died in France, stayed in France. But, when I came back I started looking for you and to be honest, it wasn’t hard, you’re kind of a celebrity. I know that princes, dukes, ministers, rich gals, and almost every man with eyes would kill to be by your side. I know you’re well educated, you’re probably the only woman I know that went to college. I know who you are. So now tell me, would you even say hello to the man I was before I became who I am now? No YN, you wouldn’t. Cause at the end of the day I’m not a man who could’ve dated you, cause I didn’t had anything to offer you. So how was I supposed to chase a woman like you? Let’s be honest love, you’re out of my league. -Thomas sipped from his whisky, his eyes never leaving hers.- I started my company, doing bets, protecting people, doing business and everything else for two reasons, the first one is cause I always wanted to give my family everything they deserved and the second, cause I want to get myself anything I want, anything I desire, and guess what? I desire you, YN. I want you. I’ve wanted you since the first time I saw you in France.- She didn’t say a word. To be honest, she was pretty amused.
The dinner went by fast. Not much talk between them but also, they couldn’t keep their gaze to themselves. They ate and have one or two laughs. Everything was going okay. It was average. But YN always wanted more than average.
-So now that you’ve tried to impress me and clearly failed, why don’t you take me to somewhere that I can actually have fun. Somewhere you actually enjoy, somewhere we can be ourselves and stop pretending. Show me where would Thomas Shelby take a girl to have a little fun?
-You won’t like it. I’m not sure you’ll like my world.
-Hmm... I’m feeling adventurous.- a smile appeared on her face, she was challenging him.
-Okay... cmon...-He stood up after leaving some cash on the table, giving the young waiter, the tip of his life. And for the first time on the whole night YN took his hand. They drove away and YN could see how the streets of London changed from the safest and prettiest ones to the dangerous and poorest. She loved to be out of her comfort zone. Thomas parked his car and she could notice a few blocks away from they parked, lights that attracted everyone.
-A pub? You brought me to a freakin pub?
-Oi! This isn’t like a pub you’ve probably been to. This is not the type of gals you interact with. This are working men, men who fought in France, men who don’t care about money or your last name... trust me, you’ll have a blast. I promise.
-And if I don’t?-She asked challenging him again. She loved to play.
-If you don’t have fun, you’ll decide where we go the next time... but if you do have fun, I’ll kiss you.
-Who says there’s going to be a second date?
-Its a feeling love... now let’s go.
Thomas couldn’t take his eyes away from her while she walked. He had been waiting for this moment all day and looked thru out the day, repeatedly at his watch. This feels like a first date, and in a way it is, but Tommy didn’t do first dates, not until her. He had never taken a prospect girl out to dinner. He had sat through interminable meetings that day, bought a business, and fired three people. Nothing He had done today, including almost killing a man, dispelled the anxiety Tommy had wrestled with all day. That power is in the hands of YN. YN made him anxious, he hadn’t even taste her but he was already addicted.
As they entered the pub fulled with men who feared, loved and respected Thomas, everything got quiet. Not a soul would dare to speak.
-Fellas. Is this a funeral or why the scary faces? Cmon! Drinks are on me today! You deserve it! -
Every man in the room cheered, but Thomas only noticed the admiring glances from those same men, and in the case of one handsome, athletic guy, overt appreciation of his date. It’s not something Tommy have dealt with before...and to be honest, he didn’t liked it. It seemed that that night, all the men only had eyes for Miss YN. They walked while Thomas gave them a withering look that send them in retreat from the room. Taking her hand, he lead her to the bar.
-Mr. Shelby! So nice to see ya again-An old man smiled to the couple.
-What would you like to drink?- Tommy is rewarded with a knowing smile as she sits down.
-I’ll have whatever you’ll have, please.
-Two whiskeys, Irish, Tom.- Tommy said to the bartender before they slide into a booth. Thomas sitting right next to her.
-So... you’re quite de celebrity aren’t you?-She smiles to him while making fun on him. YN actually was surprised of all the love Thomas Shelby received and yet, he didn’t seem to care.
They drank the whole night, she sang to him, and he danced with her. They talked, for hours. They went to the roof of the pub and watch some fireworks. YN talked about college, about art, about her favorite books, about her fears, she even talked about Alex. Tommy talked about his family, about the company, about Ruby and Charlie, he talked about his childhood, about the games he played with his brothers, about the war. It was so easy to talk to each other. It felt like they’ve always known each other. YN was everything Tommy always wanted, she wasn’t afraid of thinking for herself, she was smart and she was passionate about almost everything that intrigued her. She was fearless and a little bit reckless, yet caring and loving. And she laughed, she laughed about everything and it was really easy for her to make new friends. She loved to party and to have fun. She wasn’t scared to be herself in a world that tells you who you are supposed to be. Fuck. Thomas really liked her. And Tommy was everything YN always craved. A rational man who didn’t fear his instincts. A man who cared about his family and everyone he loved. He was powerful and a control freak, but with her he let go. He was free and wasn’t scared of anything. He does what he wants and takes what he wants. He has ambitions and damn he’s intelligent. Oh and he’s gorgeous.
They laughed and talked for hours and hours, until it was early in the morning. 5 am marked the clock, but they wanted so much of each other that time didn’t seem to care. But they had stuff to do, even if the dreamt of staying in that little booth their whole lives, real life was starting out there.
-Let’s go YN, I’ll take you home.-He took her hand and they started to walk in the still dark sky, out of the pub they acted as if they still were in their bubble.
-I don’t want this to end...-She spoke while walking before she stopped to look at Tommy.-I feel so liberated when I’m with you.
-Well did you have fun?-Thomas asked the girl while he cornered her to a wall. Her back hitting lightly the wall. Him getting closer to her. Bodies brushing into one and other.
-Are you kidding me? This is the most fun I’ve had in a long time...-She smiled to him and Tommy could’ve sworn he could feel his heart race.
-Good. That’s good. Cause know I’m going to be able to do something I’ve been wanted to do since the first time I saw you in France.-And with that being said, Thomas kissed the red lips of the girl who had been teasing him all night. And god she felt so good. She was a goddess, of that Tommy was sure. And she tasted so heavenly.
-You’re going to be the death of me love...-Thomas said in a whisper before driving YN to her house and ending their beautiful night.
#peaky blinders#peaky blinders imagine#peaky blinders fanfic#peaky blinders imagines#thomas shelby#thomas shelby imagines#thomas shelby fan fiction#thomas shelby imagine#thomas shelby fanfic#thomas shelby fanfiction#arthur shelby#john shelby#michael gray#finn shelby#dishonorable intentions
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Dysophonia (3/3)
Of course Allister would be up- Allister, who has no bedtime and regularly checks who’s online (and sometimes knows without checking at all)
He gets a flurry of new messages, and decides (against his better judgement) to open the chat up again:
[(11:58 pm)
🌊: any1 awake
bsides al hes always here
🐲RH_HL: me
allister: :(
Melony: Allister you really should go to bed!! 🛏⏰💤 You need your rest so you can grow up big and strong!!
🌊: mel has that ever worked
🐲RH_HL: lol
allister: hi piers
🐲RH_HL: what
oh snap
hey piers!!!!
🌊: heyy
Melony: Good evening piers! ☺️👋🏻
🌊: good 2 see u
🐲RH_HL: @championtime get in here mate I know you’re up
allister: <gif of a banette waving>
sorry that took a while to find]
He watches it scroll for a while, wondering if he’s actually delirious.
[championtime: Whaaaaaaaat
🐲RH_HL: piers is here
championtime: Seriously?
Oh wow you’re right
Brb buying a lottery ticket
Melony: That is not nice Leon 😡
🌊: lol
🐲RH_HL: lolol
Melony: 😡
🌊: leon respond 2 my email already
championtime: Anyway what’s up Piers
Ok listen I was GOING to
But then SOMEONE pinged me
🐲RH_HL: excuse me i am not the reason you’ve been putting off checking your email for three days
championtime: Why are you even awake right now Nessa
🌊: waiting 4 ur email
allister: mr Leon is very busy
🐲RH_HL: oh not you too
Leon you’ve corrupted the child
Melony: leave Allister alone 😡
How have you been Piers 😊😊]
He doesn’t know whether or not to respond. It’s really late, he ought to be trying to sleep. And... let’s be real, they probably don’t care. Still, they did ask...
He waits, one hand over the phone keyboard. When there’s no further messages:
[pierzzz: awful, if you really want to know
🌊: ?
championtime: ??/?
Melony: Oh no 😱😢
🐲RH_HL: oh hey no wait what’s up
Allister: :(
pierzzz: voice is gone
🌊: yyyyikes
pierzzz: also probably I am dying
allister: oh no
Melony: Piers you should not say things like that 😱 there are children present 😡
allister: it’s okay i know he’s joking
Melony: I meant Leon
championtime: HEY
🌊: lololol
🐲RH_HL: seriously though are you ok
pierzzz: will be eventually
championtime: Losing your voice must be a big deal
pierzzz: oh it is
would be livid if I wasn’t so bloody tired
🐲RH_HL: just ur throat? or are you like
oh
pierzzz: caught a cold or something
barely made it through the show tonight
even looking at the screen is making my head hurt like hell
🌊: turn ur brightness down genius
pierzzz: it’s on minimum smartass
🐲RH_HL: why did you even do the concert
pierzzz: came on too fast
was fine this morning now I’m just
☠️
championtime: That sounds more like the flu mate
🐲RH_HL: yeah
pierzzz: oh fantastic
Melony: Oh no!! 😢
Are you going to be ok?
pierzzz: ill be fine
just gotta sleep it off
championtime: You sure?
🌊: was that a pun
🐲RH_HL: can and will corvicab over there if you are actually dying
pierzzz: what no what
championtime: No to who
pierzzz: all of you cut it out
wait
championtime: HA
pierzzz: nO NOT YOU
allister: :(
🐲RH_HL: got it be right there
pierzzz: STOP
Melony: Raihan, calm down. It’s past midnight, taking a taxi at this hour is a little unreasonable.
pierzzz: THANK you melony
Melony: You can pay him a visit tomorrow morning. 😊
pierzzz: i have never been so betrayed in my life
🌊: lolololol]
Piers briefly considers throwing the phone against the wall.
[🐲RH_HL: in all seriousness though mate my schedule is clear tomorrow
pierzzz: don’t waste your day off on me
you’re not allowed
🐲RH_HL: says who?
pierzzz: says me
🐲RH_HL: why
pierzzz: what
what kind of dumb question is that
🐲RH_HL: Give me one good reason I shouldn’t
pierzzz: w
🌊: raihans using caps what timeline r we in
championtime: And punctuation
It’s like I don’t even know him anymore
pierzzz: i don’t ws’
🌊: typo
pierzzz: i dont want to be a bother
gone from this chat for months then the first thing i do when i show up again is complain
allister: is that why you waited so long to speak
championtime: I bet it is
pierzzz: i don’t ever speak here i don’t know why i’m even in the chat still
i don’t come to any of the league functions i’ve only ever met a couple of you in person once
i’m an awful gym leader
i don’t deserve your attention
🌊: wow
ok
suddenly feels like im sitting in on smth super personal
🐲RH_HL: piers
pierzzz: i’m sorry
that was too much ill
i should go
championtime: No don’t
allister: <gif of a sad shuppet>
Melony: Oh, dear...
🐲RH_HL: stop
piers stop it
right now
pierzzz: what
🐲RH_HL: stop talking about yourself like that
pierzzz: everything i said was true
🐲RH_HL: those last two parts definitely were not
pierzzz: raihan
🐲RH_HL: listen
i
we’re still friends right?
i know i’ve said some bad things to you in the past
stuff i regret
and i know we don’t see each other much anymore
🌊: do i hear secret backstory
🐲RH_HL: but like
Melony: Nessa, shush.
allister: yeah if you point it out he might stop
championtime: Guys, cmon
🐲RH_HL: i still care about you???
if you’re in a bad spot and there’s something I can do
I wanna help you out however I can
pierzzz:
championtime: I’m shocked you’re talking this much
Usually with me you’d just pretend to drop it and then show up anyways
🐲RH_HL: Leon shut up
championtime: :P
🌊: sounds like him
allister: one time he showed up at my gym in the middle of the night without even asking
🐲RH_HL: I’m ignoring all of you
especially you Allister I genuinely don’t know what you’re going on about and that’s not a can of wormadams I want to open right now
Melony: Oh, dear.
🌊: yikes wtf
🐲RH_HL: Piers
Are you sure I can’t come over tomorrow?]
...
...Piers gives up.
[pierzzz: if you really want to
i won’t stop you
🌊: dawwwwwww
Melony: Awwww!
pierzzz: shut up all of you before I take it all back
🐲RH_HL: nessa if you ruin this im making it rain in hulbury for two weeks straight
🌊: HEY
it was Mel too
championtime: I’m glad to see you two getting along
Wish I could join you but I’m swamped
🌊: hey yea that reminds me check ur email
championtime: 3dsjkvdcjosko
pierzzz: god no
full offense I think being in the same room as both of you at once would actually kill me
allister: mr kabu says that sometimes
championtime: Does he now?..
Melony: 😅
🐲RH_HL: ill pull up a picture of leon on my phone
he’ll contribute exactly as much as the real one would have
pierzzz: sounds about right
championtime: HEY
🐲RH_HL: u know im right mate
🌊: leon ur email
pierzzz: he’s right
🌊: leon ur email
🐲RH_HL: leon ur email
championtime: stop
🐲RH_HL: leon ur email
🌊: leon ur email
pierzzz: leon ur email
championtime: TRAITOR
🌊: lolololololololol
Melony: It’s getting late, and I’m not one for Bother Leon Hour. I’m going to go to sleep now. Good night, everyone! 🛌💤
pierzzz: me 2
🌊: nooooooooo
stay up and help me spam Leon
pierzzz: would love to but
again
dying
🌊: boo
🐲RH_HL: let him sleep nessa
allister: i can help
championtime: .
I can’t get mad at you in front of melony
🐲RH_HL: Mel left
championtime: you tiny judas
🌊: leon ur email
allister: mr leon ur email
🌊: you’ve got the spirit at least
pierzzz: bye
🐲RH_HL: See u
pierzzz: yeah ok]
He turned his phone off, and stared at it for a few seconds after the screen went black.
If he didn’t know better, he’d say his headache went away a bit.
Hm.
#piers#pokemon piers#nessa#pokemon nessa#leon#pokemon leon#allister#pokemon allister#melony#pokemon melony#raihan#pokemon raihan#pokemon#sword and shield#swsh#fanfiction#drabble#?#this took SO LONG#im not happy with it but i wouldnt have been happy with anything i needed to just put a bow on it and move on#h
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hey darling,you're my best friend
Stranger: But there’s a fewer things that you don’t know of
You: AHAHAHA
You: Why I borrow your lipstick so often
Stranger: I am using your shirt as a pillow case
You: I wanna ruin our friendship
Stranger: We should be lovers instead
You: I don't know how to say this...
You: 'Cause you're really my dearest friend ahahahahaha
Stranger: Cause you’re really my dearest friend
Stranger: Nice!
You: yooooo
Stranger: Hahahaha
You: ahahah what's up?
Stranger: You just made my day!
You: aaaawwwww
You: nooo, YOU made my day
Stranger: My dearest friend! 😂
You: 😂😂😂😂
Stranger: So, who are you?
Stranger: Darling
You: AHAHAH i'm a stranger
Stranger: Say less!
You: ahahahahah named Sarah
You: who r you?
Stranger: Hey Sarah! My name is Zala
You: No way Zala
You: Sarah, Zala
You: 😂😂
You: Nice name btw
Stranger: Haha thank you 😂
You: np lmao ahah well, wyd here girl?
Stranger: I am just boring. And I put tiktok because I don’t want to have “ads for kik or onlyfans” by every second message
Stranger: Didn’t expect anyone from tiktok here tho
You: oooh i get u, i'm bored as well, i mean, everybody's bored on omegle 😂 what's new right
You: and well, actually, i'm not from there but ik that trend so idk, i just felt like 😂
Stranger: I just watch tiktoks
Stranger: Never made any
You: Yeaa, but in my case, i saw it on yt
You: so i thought "why not?" ahhaha
Stranger: Why not! Do it more often tho
You: well, I was thinking about doing it with someone on snapchat but idk
Stranger: Good idea, but I just don’t like screenshoting pictures. Then people know that something is going on
You: Oooh yea but i could do it after u know..
You: Idk, i don't even know if i'm gonna post it
Stranger: Yeah I understand
You: Idk anyways
You: People here before you, just skipped me away when i sent "hey darling, you're my best friend"
You: like cmon guys
Stranger: Hahahah I believe! I usually skip when I get “horny”
Stranger: Boy please stope
You: Yeaaaaaa ikr, i hate it
You: I mean, nobody cares right
Stranger: Yeah
Stranger: I get on befrore “M, horny..... skip”
Stranger: I was just laughing at myself and skip it
You: AAHHAHAHA
You: "m>skip
Stranger: Hahhahaha
You: most guys who send "m" are horny, basically ahahhaha
Stranger: True
Stranger: I always say first like “hey”
You: Yeeeeaaasss
Stranger: How are you. Not just F
Stranger: And it’s hard to find a girl who will talk with you
You: Something like "wyd", "what's good?" not f, bc no one asked
Stranger: Like if I say F back, I always get skip
You: U mean, girls?
Stranger: Yes
You: Ooh i feel u, they skip me too
You: Like "???"
Stranger: Exactly!
You: it's like you're only here for boys, damn girl
Stranger: How old are you tho? Because I like the way you’re thinking
You: Do u wanna guess?
Stranger: Hoping more then 16😂
You: Uuuum i'm 16 😂
You: Hbu
Stranger: 20
Stranger: Don’t call me old now!
Stranger: 😂😂
You: I wont 😂
You: Maybe later but not now ahahahahhah
You: Nah i'm joking
Stranger: Hahahah mean!
You: Yea, so mean!!! ahhahah
You: where r u from btw?
Stranger: Europe
Stranger: Slovenia
Stranger: You?
You: Ooh that's so cool
You: I'm from Brazil
Stranger: Oh waw
You: Far aaaway right ahhah
Stranger: Yeah
You: say something in slovenian/slovene idk
Stranger: Hello, I am Zala. - živjo, jaz sem Zala
You: Seems so fancy
Stranger: How are you - kako si
Stranger: Hahah it’s actually hard to learn
You: Yeaaa i bet!!!
Stranger: You speak in portugal?
You: Portuguese
You: Yea :)
Stranger: Some things I remember from primary school
Stranger: Hahaha
You: well, do u know something in portuguese?
You: ahahhaha
Stranger: No hahah
You: Oh okay ahah
Stranger: But you can teach me!
You: Yea, sure
You: Hey, my name's Sarah, nice meeting you. - E aí, meu nome é Sarah, prazer te conhecer.
You: How r u?- Como você está?
Stranger: Uhhh I hate this letters àáèê
Stranger: Hahaha
You: AHAHHAHA
Stranger: Always have trouble pronouncing them
You: It's not that hard, trust me ahaha
Stranger: Hahah okay
You: So
You: how r things over there?
Stranger: Corona?
You: Yea
Stranger: We are in “lockdown” for 6 weeks now. We have police hours from 21-6
Stranger: Only grocery stores are open
You: Oh i didn't know that
Stranger: It’s weird
Stranger: We have to wear mask everywhere
You: I mean, most of europe is in lockdown right?
Stranger: Yes
Stranger: How are things in Brazil?
You: there's no lockdown over here but we still wearing mask everywhere
Stranger: I hope it ends soon
You: Yea, same :) at least, i hope it gets a lil bit better bc the situation it's not good.
Stranger: True. Let’s hope for 2021 to bring good news
You: Hopefully
You: wyd now?
Stranger: Some university work
Stranger: You?
You: Oooh i was about to say "homework" as well ahahha
You: Same zzz but not university, high school
Stranger: I could say, you are 16
You: Yea yea
You: What do u study btw?
Stranger: Educational science.
Stranger: Let me explain
You: Go ahead
Stranger: When I finish with uni, I will probably work in school and I will be the person, you came to, when you need help. Like social worker probably. But I will also help study people with special needs. Like doing work slowly, repeat things with them
You: Ooh i got u!! I appreciate these people btw, it's amazing :)
Stranger: Ooo thanks! So sweet of you
You: Aww :)
Stranger: Are you in general high school or for special job?
You: Both ahahah
Stranger: Oh, so like what?
Stranger: If I guess it’s nursing
Stranger: Hahaha
Stranger: That was one of my opinions when I went to high school
You: ahahhaha actually, accounting ahah
Stranger: Okay hahah
Stranger: Not bad at all
You: I mean...
You: I dunno 😂
Stranger: You will see
Stranger: Enjoy your life as a teenager!
You: don't even dare
Stranger: Hahah
Stranger: I was starting to party when I was 16
Stranger: And now corona
You: 4 years it's a long time okay 😂
Stranger: Hahahha okay okay
You: Corona sucks
You: i can't go to parties 😂
Stranger: Hahah same tho!
You: everyone's in the same boat right
Stranger: Right
You: Yaa
Stranger: I will let you finish your homework
You: Don't do that
Stranger: Hahaha
You: But well, i'll let u finish your university work
You: wait, first, what time is it?
Stranger: 18:40
Stranger: Almost 7pm
You: Yea ik
You: It's 14:40
You: almost 3pm
Stranger: Isn’t it interesting. How different is time around the world
Stranger: We will celebrate new year before you
You: it's really interesting. I have a name for it.
You: It's called timezone 😂
You: i'm so funny right.
You: joking.
Stranger: Hahahah
Stranger: You’re
Stranger: Never heard of timezone before
Stranger: 😂😂😂
You: Yeaaaa ikr, i mean, I created this name
You: By myself
Stranger: Omg Sarah the creator
Stranger: Everyone will learn about you
You: I'm a genius 😂😂
You: ahahahhahaha
Stranger: So glad that I meet you
Stranger: Hahahah
You: Aw :) me too :) so glad that i meet u
You: Aw is my second name, i'm always "aw" 😂 as u can see
Stranger: Hhahha 🥺🥺
Stranger: Do you want to keep talking on other social media?
Stranger: No pressure
You: Yeaa!! sure :)) i was about to ask it.
You: do u got insta?
Stranger: I do
Stranger: ferjancic.zala
You: shhht
You: mine is @sarahcvlm
Stranger: Wow so depressing quote 😂
You: I said "shht" bc I uninstalled my insta yesterday, but I'm gonna follow you later, I swear ahahhaha
You: Depressing? 😂 Okay i'm a depressed now bc it's basically my life aahahah
Stranger: Hhahaha don’t be like that
Stranger: I send you request
You: I'm joking, it's just a quote from Anne with an E :)
You: Oke :)) installing instagram again
Stranger: Okay
Stranger: Hahahah oh
You: "Oh" 😂
Stranger: Oh, you didn’t have to do that
You: Stop it
You: i was gonna do it, soon or later dw
Stranger: Okay okay😊
You: Done
You: Ooh, you're so cute Zala :)
Stranger: Awww 🥰
Stranger: You are too!
You: Aw, thanks :))
You: both followed :)
You: See ya there?
Stranger: See ya!
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𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐬𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐚 𝐬𝐭𝐲𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐝𝐮𝐜𝐞 𝐱 𝟏𝟎𝟏 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐣𝐢𝐧𝐰𝐨𝐨
ok so lowkey this is based off of true beauty when jugyeong was doing makeup for the guys in pick pick boys
this is my first imagine bullet thingy whatever so please bare with me :’))
lets get it
you were the younger sister of one of the stylists for produce x 101
and since your sister was young, she’s been hella into makeup and growing up you kind of picked it up as well
so the both of you were like the makeup gurus of your family
so when one day the produce x 101 staff for hair and makeup is lacking a person
the producers and directors were asking if there was anyone who could help out last minute
bc they were already half way through shooting an episode and these boys were literally abt to perform
they needed as much help they could get, so ur sister
being the genius she is
was like “ holy shit i’ve got a sister who might as well be as talented as me “
ngl tho you probably were
anywaY
your sister had organized everything, she had told the producers, she had told you and everything was set
lemme just tell say, that you were lowkey p a n i c k i n g
you did keep up with produce x 101 but you weren’t exactly a die hard fan
you knew some fairly popular trainees and the only connection you really had to the show as that your sister was working there
so then your first day came
to be honest, all you really did was help out with minor things and passing stuff around for the first half but then
one of the other stylist ladies had asked you to take over for her
and you were n e r v o u s
mostly bc these guys were basically idols already as they had already gained popularity on the show
the guy ( more like boy ) that you were assigned to was none other than
haenam’s boy, the only boy, lee jinwoo
you knew exactly who he was
you weren’t living under a rock, your friends were constantly talking abt the trainees in pdx101 and jinwoo did come up in one of your conversations once
and you felt like you were hit by a bus
this boy’s visuals were no joke
despite him being rlly rlly cute on screen, he was pretty shy in real life
you guessed it added to his cuteness tho
the two of you were the same age and you didn’t know if that made it awkward or not ??
you were just confused to be real yall
your first encounter was … awkward
the two of you have introduced yourselves and you both were rlly nice
its just
the two of you were blushing like you were about to have a heat stroke
it didn’t help that you had to stare it his face while trying to makeup on him
and you were just dead
d e a d
y/n.exe has stopped working
and jinwoo was the exact same
he’s still relatively young, so love was kind of like
non-existent for him
the only type of affection that he received that wasn’t from his parents were from his fangirls
his noona fangirls
that being said, his main priority was always to debut
but that didn’t mean he was immune to crushes
yeah sure jinwoo has had some small crushes here and there
mostly girls who were older
but you were different
omfg the cheesiness send help
the only people jinwoo interacted with his age were the trainees that were his age as well
which wasn’t alot
and even then he was closer with other trainees
* cough * jinhyuk * cough *
that being said, the two of you were whipped the moment you saw each other
thankfully, the two of you were able to survive your first encounter without bursting
but that wasn’t your last day there
at that time, the trainees were going through the position evaluation
so jinwoo was performing to my youth
after your experience you started following pdx101 more thoroughly
mostly to see jinwoo
seeing him acting all cute n shit in the episodes
probably gave you minor cardiac arrest
anyway, the staff liked having extra hands around
they didn’t have to move around so frequently and things were just easier when you helped out
so the next time the boys needed to get prepared for something
you were there
this time, you and jinwoo actually had a proper conversation
you were also able to help and meet some other trainees
seungyoun was especially rlly friendly
he just had a big brother type of vibe u know ?
bc the universe was on our side, you were able to work with jinwoo again
this time you were feeling a little less like “ i’m not gonna talk and our faces are gonna be rlly close but im still not gonna talk and it’s gonna be rlly awkward “
bc no one wanted that
lowkey everyone could see you two had small crushes each other
like cmon
jinwoo was blushing during and after you had done his makeup last time
anyway you both got to know each other
he found out that you two were roughly the same age
he was lowkey vv shy and was nodding like 70% of the time
but he was rlly sweet
jinwoo didn’t exactly have a lot of friends his age, especially after joining produce
in school he always just had a few friends but eventually everyone wanted to be his friend
and he sorta knew why and he just wasn’t interested
he was glad there was someone that he could talk to aside from the other trainees
and it wasn’t like he was going anywhere else
so the two of you exchanged numbers
the boys aren’t really allowed to use their phones while being apart of produce
so it was kind of pointless
nonetheless, you were happy
at least you had moved past the awkward stage
you took every chance to go visit
eventually the two of you were joint to the hip
you had your own inside jokes and the two of you were rlly close friends
for a bit the two of you just kinda stuck with friends bc you didn’t know each other too well
but after awhile those initial feelings of attraction came back
you came over every time the boys had to perform, once you weren’t able to do his makeup but it didn’t matter bc the two of you were still talking even from all the way across the room
you did his hair and makeup for pretty girl
you were able to watch it live
and idk if it’s physically possible to bust out an uwu
but you did
he did so well, his dance ? phenomenal
facial expressions ? legend
your wig ? in china
anyway, a few weeks pass and you haven’t seen him and life is
dull
cue dramatic sad music
but then you get a call as your waiting for the next episode of produce to play
and your heart nearly stopped functioning bc jinwoo was calling you
and at first you didn’t realize that he had his phone even though he wasn’t supposed too
anyway this boi was crying
and you were like huh wait what boi whats wrong
and he tells you he had been eliminated and you were devastated
you didn’t expect him to get eliminated but more because he was really crying his eyes out
you had missed the episode because you had moved to your room instead of the living room to talk to him
eventually your comforting over the phone had worked ( miraculously ) and he had stopped crying
i mean he’s still a whole child, the both of you were
you didn’t really know what to do to get him to feel better
you two kept talking after he had stopped crying
you could occasionally here his sniffles over the phone and you tried not to squeal
bc aghem i am calm and i don’t have feelings for my friend
you two had agreed to hang out the next day
you two got ice cream and basically spent the day together
honestly him getting eliminated is what brought you two closer
you helped out with the debut evaluation bc even though jinwoo wasn’t on produce anymore
you had still made a lot of friends on the show
they all asked you how jinwoo was
especially jinhyuk and wooseok his parents
you told him he was getting better
after all he was still sixteen ( in korea )
he had a whole future ahead of him
eventually you both had realized you were head over heels for each other
not necessarily love, you two were still going through puberty and well life
but you knew you both wanted to be more than just friends
both of you hung out a lot
and multiple times you just wanted to squish his cheeks and hug him
one time it was freezing out but despite that you met up to hang out
the two of you were wrapped in big jackets and scarves
you were walking around a park and it started snowing
a snowflake landed on your nose
and as cliche as that sounds
maybe the universe was making an exception for two cute human beings who were just too pure and soft
he had laughed and wiped it off your nose with his gloved hand
you were really near each other
you both were just laughing softly and were just looking at each other
like wow ok i’m friends with the smolest person ever save my heart pls
you looked away after you realized you were staring at each other for quite some time
yes you were blushing
so was jinwoo but he tried to hide it
he laughed again and smiled at you
you were mentally telling him to stop being so smug and cute
you grabbed his arm and told him to hurry up so you both could eat some ramen
jinwoo was dragged by you to some local convenience store
the two of you shared some ramen and multiple girls had asked for a photo
ngl you were kind of jealous
some of them were nice
but some of them were looking you up and down
liKE EXCUSE ME MISS IM HIS FRIEND AND YOU’RE NOT GET OFF YOUR HIGH HORSE
but you’re way too nice for that and jinwoo was watching
mostly the second part
after that you both walked to your house, where his mom’s car was already parked
eventually your parents met because your mom kept wondering who you were leaving the house so much for
not that she was complaining
she kept up with produce too, she knew who this soft boi was
he said goodbye to you and your mom
before getting into the car
he had hugged you
and mumbled a bye with his chin on your shoulder
you hugged him back ofc
bc who were u to reject a hug from this cute ass boy
although the two of you weren’t exactly waiting for the other to make it official
you both kind of knew that you liked each other
with the help of the other trainees ofc bc you all had a group chat together
you two acted like a soft couple that only shared hugs in public
and held hands only when you two were alone
the farthest you’ve gone is cheek kisses
after a date you were about to leave when you turned around, ran back, and kissed his cheek before saying thank you for the fun day
and you basically ran away after, looking like a whole ass tomato
but he was blushing just as much
to summarize, you two are the cutest non-official couple in the whole of korea
not just the south
im talking about the whole goddamn korea
#lee jinwoo#produce x 101#produce 101#x1#kim wooseok#kim yohan#kang minhee#produce x 101 imagines#produce x 101 scenarios#produce x 101 jinwoo#haenami#cha junho#song hyeongjun#son dongpyo#cho seungyoun#han seungwoo#nam dohyun#lee hangyul#lee eunsang#produce x 101 lee jinwoo#x1 scenarios#x1 imagines#lee jinwoo au#lee jinwoo x reader#lee jinwoo imagine#pdx101#pdx101 imagine
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Peridot: Why she’s not around often, and why there’s still hope.
K, so I love Peridot. I love her so much. More than life itself. Why is she just..never around? Back in season 4, during the whole zoo arc, she had a lot of use? Like, she could have avoided any issues getting there for starters, being a technician. And she’s more accustomed to how homeworld works than the others? When Aquamarine and Topaz were kidnapping people, she wasn’t there to help rescue the humans, or when Steven got back. And the fact that she was the one who provided Homeworld with a list of names? That’s good fodder for her character! She got Steven kidnapped! Cmon, she’s gotta have some sort of reaction! But no. Nothing until Raising The Barn. Lapis left and that opened the door for more development when it came to Peridot. But what did we get? One episode of her being sad and then nothing until Made Of Honor. And like??? Where was she when we found out about Rose being Pink Diamond anyway? I mean, she was living under the same roof as the gems! Then there’s the fact that she had such a minor role in Reunited? And only got her star because the whole cast was due for a makeover, which just completely took any sort of focus away from her star! Which we were all waiting for her to get for three years! What did she do in the movie? It was a good opportunity to get more of her. Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl were incapacitated at the time. Steven didn’t have his powers. Peridot could have finally had a chance to be a part of saving the world! She should have been! She knew about the injector Spinel used, and the writers could have at least tried to act like she was doing something! But instead she. Bismuth, and Lapis all stood and stared at the injector for what, forty something hours?!? I swear, that scene where Steven says, “I have no more friends to help me-”, completely forgetting about Peri and the other’s until they’re shoved in his face, was leaked audio of the writers forgetting my girl exists.
Now, I have a lot of hope for Peri in season six, because the writers- weather they did it on purpose or not- set her up for a lot of character growth. Some people see the way she was written as lazy too. Her being so happy-go-lucky, joky, and fun? It’s been seen as poor writing by many people. But I see something behind it. Because her character has become forced. And i’m certain the crew noticed it. Who didn’t? I still love her, but that’s just because i’m literally obsessed with her. But in all my obsessions and dozens of rewatches of every episode she’s in...i’ve noticed something that changed the way I see her personality.
Peridot has a very self destructive personality. It’s not shown there at the surface, but throughout the whole show, there have always been notes of it. Back when she was a homeworld gem, despite what her initial ego may suggest, I am under the impression that Peridot was pretty low ranking. She places herself above Pearl’s, but not much else? I’ll assume they’re more valued than Ruby’s, because Ruby’s seem to be considered pretty expendable. But like? She places Quartz Soldiers higher than herself, and while some of them, namely Jasper, are respected, we’ve seen from the way the Amethyst’s at the zoo are treated that they aren’t typically very high class. And her original devout loyalty to homeworld means she’d probably already have practically no self esteem with her lower ranking and homeworld’s obsession with conformity? Plus Peridot didn’t have any powers and that can’t help at all. And yeah, when shd joined the Crystal Gems she had to denounce the whole system, but her entire life before that point, her inferiority was a f a c t to her. Joining the Crystal Gems must hay have helped her views on life and her morals, but I’m not sure she became any healthier as a person? Like, yeah the Crystal Gems taught her basic values and morals. But they didn’t teach them to her in a way that made sure she understood, they just kinda got mad at her when she messed up and let her figure it out herself. I’m not saying the Crystal Gems did anything wrong. But like..she really learned that it was fine for people to inflict arbitrary rules onto her without justifying it and then get mad when she breaks their silent rules. Like when Amethyst supported her making fun of all the other Crystal Gems and then got mad when Peridot made fun of her. Obviously we all know making fun of people to their face is wrong. But she didn’t. And the way she learned was too vague because she just learned that if you upset someone it’s always your fault and that you don’t need to understand, just to blindly apologize so things are okay again. And in the episode Too Far, Peridot tries so hard to make Amethyst laugh. To please Amethyst. It’s why she ended up insulting Amethyst in the first place! Her need to please starts showing itself very clearly at that point. Now, the Crystal gems only ever taught her how to be a good person. But that changed. Enter Lapis Lazuli. A deeply traumatized gem. A gem who was irritable and emotionally volatile. And Peridot, who was taught by homeworld that she didn’t matter, and by the Crystal Gems that other people did matter, and had a right to be angry at her whenever they pleased for reasons she didn’t understand, was absolutely vulnerable to how Lapis acted. Now, she clearly doesn’t go out of her way to please people she doesn’t know. But she did know Lapis. She had an overwhelming desire for Lapis to like her as well. And so we leave a gem whose bound to be very sensitive and have countless triggers (and is prone to angry or emotional outbursts)...alone with a gem whose all set up not to stand up for herself and that when someone’s upset at you, do anything you can to make it right, and it’s absolutely your fault. Immediately after being left with Lapis, though, her personality hadn’t changed into the wacky funtime dorito a lot of my fellow fans (and the critics too), like to criticize. And that’s because it wasn’t until Too Short To Ride that the final piece of her self sacrificing, horribly self-destructive personality came into place. If you don’t recall, there was a scene where Peridot was upset. At first Amethyst just..comforted her. But, well, when Peridot didn’t immediately feel better and fake joy for Amethyst...her tablet was nearly thrown into the sea. This was treated as completely fine and normal. And Peridot, i’m sure, suffered for it. Because there came the idea that things worked out better if she was who people wanted her to be. Peridot changed after that. Amethyst had punished her for being sad. And Lapis must have taken it poorly if Peridot ever got angry. Those things combined with the rest of her character arc? Of course she started trying to lighten the mood whenever she could. Of course she dedicated herself to being happy and silly and making sure everyone else was alright. And this is deeply written into her subtext, most notably in Raising The Barn. Now, at first I thought that episode was meant to highlight that Lapis was a very bad ‘friend’ (or gf, however you wanna read it), to Peri. But well...the show never treated it like that. They never treated lines like “i’ve been bending over backwards for her” or “I can’t tell her how I feel” or “There are things I should tell you, but I know they’ll upset you, so I don’t say those things”, and of course “We don’t matter. Lapis needs us”/”We don’t have a choice in this.” like they were about Lapis being toxic- even emotionally abusive to an extent, which is how I initially read it. Lapis never learned a lesson. No one said Lapis did anything wrong. Of course, I do still think Lapis was wrong there (she made the choice that they were leaving without consulting Peridot. She got angry at Peridot for lying to her when she had no right to. Etc), but now I realize that it wasn’t just Lapis being awful and having no consequences.That episode was there to shove this aspect of Peridot’s personality in our faces. And most of us missed it completely. Of course, it makes sense, seeing as many things Rebecca and the other writers weave into the show are only there in hindsight. It took me twenty views and multiple rants about how the way that episode showed their relationship was pointless, to realize just what the point is. And what’s more? In the climax of the episode, Lapis leaves. Peridot is emotionally open with Lapis, the thing she’d been afraid to do, the thing that goes against her self destructive way of thinking...and Lapis leaves. That is why I am 100% sure Peridot is still stuck in her self destructive behaviors with no one noticing and no real support system to help her deal with it.
So yes, the writers set her character up perfectly for the future. Weather they meant to or not. We’ll only see if it was bad writing or a perfect setup once the show is over. And well...I hold out hope that this was purposeful. Because if there’s one thing I know about Rebecca Sugar, it’s that she’s a genius at story and character writing. There’s no way she didn’t mean for this to happen. Or at least, that she hasn’t seen the open door and decided to take that opportunity. I have a lot of respect for Rebecca, and I want everyone to know she will most likely do our Peri justice.
I would love to have any thoughts? Weather they’re agreeing with me, adding to my thoughts, or criticizing what I said. I would love any discussion on this topic because it’s been bouncing around my head for a long while now.
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Intricacy
Warnings: angst, angst to fluff, nsfw-ish (nothing super graphic but sorta,)
Length: 2.9k
Authors Note: inspired heavy by this song by the artic monkeys, gets super corny at the end bc i love fluff and h -
Summary: Spencer can’t deny he needs you but do you need him? Thats all he wants to know
Intoxication, pure and unfiltered seeping into his lungs and clouding his thoughts with nothing but the images of primal lust only a woman like you could bring Spencer. Leaving a man speechless takes nothing short of what one could call capabilities in seduction, but Spencer Reid wasn’t most men.
He couldn’t deny himself the obvious, the factor that would indeed be that you were awfully attractive. A beautiful woman, a capable one. Sure physically he saw you nothing short of stunning, your haircut framed your face and the clothes you wore for him and him only burned into the back of his brain like most of the things he remembered didn’t. And sure when he thought of you most of his memories are of you on your knees, and the soft sounds you made when he tugged at your hair, or the way you look bent over the side of couch in a hotel room because you made it utterly impossible for him to just wait.
Spencer Reid couldn’t call it love, not yet anyways. As much as it wasn’t lust either, you just happened to be you. You were woman, and undeniably intelligent, stunningly gorgeous, and fiercely powerful woman, with a kind heart and even gentler amount of attitude. And every one of Spencer 5 senses had images and thoughts and pictures and recollections of you, oh the things our beautiful boy genius would do to get a taste of your company made him speechless.
Spencer reid was not the type for primal desire, desire for him was based solely upon love, and you, a woman he so desperately loved made him feel like he could do anything. Not a rush of adrenaline, but a life-line, a reassurance. In all the ways you were a need, you were a want, you were a must. When he got chances to call you, he did. Just to speak to you, get an opinion, or hear your voice. And when you called him out on the fact he just happened to miss, in the way you only could with all the love and gentleness of almost a mother, he couldn’t help it but smile.
In the moment, all he could think about was you and how soft your thighs felt under his fingertips, with the desire to please you clouding his head. His mouth placing open mouthed kisses onto your neck and his other hand rubbing you out onto him softly, lacking in vulgarity but filled with the kind of lust you can only receive from longing. Spencer Reid longed for you, to make you feel good, to hear his name come out of your mouth that would read to him as holy as sermon, in that moment in something that is typically so filthy, Spencer would look to be yours in whatever way he could.
“Spencer - aah” Your voice was smooth as ever, he felt you convulse as you came, and he held your hips down with gentle ferver.
“You look pretty like this, you’re gorgeous when you’re vulnerable like this for me, you’re like artwork,” he whispers praise to you, and he means, he loves telling you how you did, loves reassuring you and watching as your face makes expressions of pleasure in a way that only he could. Took pride in it.
Once you’ve finished, you move your hips to let Spencer have his chance at release. Your movement is quick and teasing in some sense, and with no regards to anything, you place both of your hands on his face and kiss him, he moans into your mouth and smile.
“Y/N,” your name is so sweet in his mouth, you kiss him again. Chasing the taste of him chasing his touch, and his ache. He pulls out and finishes on your stomach. Both of you sit, fascinated with each other. Touching foreheads, your heartbeat pounds in your eardrums, and Spencer just sits and admires. To him, your body was what he said it was, artwork. Covered in scars, and a couple tattoos. And history, Spencer wanted to be apart of that so desperately.
His lips find your neck, and he bites hickies into it. The gesture is soft, loving even. But even Spencer can admit in his own possession. You sigh satsified, as Spence leans over and hands you a towel to wipe yourself off with.
“You haven’t left marks on me in a while, “ you comment absentmindedly. He hums into you, and you smile.
“I missed it,” he says back. The two of you sit like that for a while, and even after the comedown Spencer is simply infatuated, even in the moment. The two of you are just soft heart beats and strong grips but he can’t stop thinking about you.
Even when he stops, the nape of your neck covered in rather dark marks and you smile. He grins at his handiwork too and you roll your eyes.
“Lemme get dressed, and we can sit for a while, okay?,” you repeat to him. Spencer nods, you place a hand to his face and run your thumb along his scruff. You hop off and his eyes follow your every move. Entranced by your ability to just be you.
You come out a big sweater and thigh high socks, with some cute boyshort panties, everything matching. Spencer jaw drops and he smiles up at you, you take a seat on his lap. A place you liked to be despite his clear embarassment, and smile at him. You sat facing forward, turning back to place a soft kiss at his jaw and is arms find themselves around his waist. His comfort is so warm, and you can’t help but nuzzle into him. He did himself a favor and changed into some pj’s and the two of you sat very cozy.
You turn around to face him, missing the view of being cuddled in his lap that way. He smiles big, and so do you.
“It’s been a while since we’ve able to you know, relax like this,” you comment. Spencer nods.
“Our situations complicated, we work with profilers after all, Y/N. I’m surprised that, no ones caught on to it yet,” He replies. You nod, placing your arms around his neck and leaning.
“We didn’t put a name on it for that very reason, beloved,” you reply. Spencer feels a pang of remorse in his chest, and sighs. He’s silent for a second to long, and you catch on to it.
“What's wrong?” you ask softly. Spencer doesn’t look at you, he’s frustrated. He’s making the face he does when he’s frustrated, you knew it well. Years of cases worked, and even more of him being upset when he needed you to come see him and assure him. One of the things Spencer loved about you was that, the way you were there for him.
“Nothing,” he replies, but his voice gives him away. Spencer loved you, that much was sure. Spencer adored you in the way he could only for one woman. The sort of fondness with your sort of magic. Adulation filled him when he looked at you, perhaps that was part of the problem, the way you looked at his expression, brows furrowed, jaw tightened, eyes squinted ever so slightly, your sympathy for whatever he went through, despite not knowing what it is.
“Spence,” you only called him that when you meant it, or worded better, when you knew he needed to hear the closeness the two of you shared, a reminder of your correspondence with one another. He sigh, melting into your fingertips through his hair, hazel colored and all.
“It’s silly, Y/N,” he replies, you shake your head.
“Not to me,” you reply.
“You don’t even know what it is,” he giggles to you. You roll your eyes.
“It could be the fact that you really need to pee and I’d write you letters of comfort,” you respond again. His smile is clear, but so is his anxiety as it softens. You place a hand on his face and run your thumb on his cheek.
“Cmon, baby,” the nickname is smooth. Like milk and honey, sweet, and comfortable.
“We’ve been doing.. well - this, for 3 years now. I still remember you walking into the BAU, and just knowing what kind of person you were. You were so beautiful, and when you spoke you were kind, and intelligent, and so helpful to everyone, and I felt so lucky to just be with you…” he trailed off, not being able to make eye contact. He could feel your discomfort and sighed.
“But?,” you question.
“But Y/N, I am so utterly in love with you. I think about you everyday, and all the time. And most of our memories make me dream the way I did when I was in highschool sure, but you’re this woman, this gorgeous, and profoundly intelligent woman and the longer we don’t have a title, the more and more I can’t help but wonder if I should save heart from shattering more than it would and move on, even though I’m not sure I could. Y/N, do you just not want to be with me, or is it something else that I can think of, to get rid of this sinking feeling,” he confesses to you solemnly. You frown at him of course, unsure of how to explain.
You both sit for a while, you wipe the tears that come his way and he sniffles.
“To be honest with you Spencer, in the beginning I just wasn’t sure about anything. I liked you, so much but if this was something temporary I didn’t wanna risk my ability or for that matter credibility as a profiler, the whole lay low thing worked. And I guess, part of me is just afraid that if it gets too serious, you’ll get bored of me, you know? We know each other so intimately, and trust each other so much, but you’re Spencer Reid, the most brilliant person most people get the chance of knowing. And there are so many women you could be with, I guess the last 3 years I’ve just been waiting in way. For you to move on, away from this whole thing. You have this prolific career you can’t risk, and I mean - I’m just me. I’m a profiler, a good agent but a part of me has always believed that the fun of this, for you was the whole not being committed thing, not having to worry about it because there wasn’t anything there” you explain to him nervously. He frowns.
“Do I seem like that kind of guy to you, Y/N?,” he questioned, you sigh.
“You’d be surprised, Spence. How many men like you are like that,” you reply.
Spencer was at a loss, for what could be the first time in his life, because he had never considered that. That perspective was unknown to him, that you could ever consider yourself to be shame on him. Spencer always saw it quite the opposite, that you were this drop dead gorgeous woman, and that maybe that's why this was secret for the two of you.
“Y/N, I have this dream, at least once a week these days, where I’m married to you. And we live this in this quiet apartment, and I read to you. And when we go on dates it’s to things we always talk about but never get the chance, and it always ends with just being in the office, holding hands and getting coffee, and I can’t help but wonder what it means,” Spencer admits.
You look at him for a while, your eyes are looming with thoughts.
“Would you marry me, Spencer?,” you asks shyly.
“In a heartbeat,” his response is so assured.
Your heart thumps in your eardrums, the weather is rainy and gloomy but the it fits the mood so well. The two of you sit, your hands resting in Spencers lap, as he takes one and kisses your knuckles. You blush red and Spencer smiles. For three years it’s been silent on the end of the commitment, any off day you could take you were together. And most nights, Spence would drive over when he could and avoid getting caught in the act of being in love. And some days Spence would offer to house sit while you were away, and at work the two of you were kind to each other but you did so well in hiding it. You always hid, away from all the light and loved Spencer in the shadows. But you didn’t like being in the dark, because in darkness you couldn’t see Spencer well, and you wanted to see him. To know he was here.
In all this artificial light, when you looked at Spencers kind eyes, the indent between his eyebrows when he’d think, or his lips, full and pink. You suppose you knew.
“I want you to marry me, Spencer,” you repeat softly.
“Okay,” he says again.
You kiss each other, both of you crying. Soft tears, but not sad ones. Happy ones, ones full of love and acceptance, and joy. Your arms are wrapped around each other, with a love so powerful the rooms over could feel it vibrate. If this is what being together felt like then she hopes it lasts forever.
__
Finally, and after a lovely 3 days, Doctor Spencer Reid walks into the BAU and he is shining. Glowing from the inside out. Not only does he greet everyone happily, he sits on his desk and smiles. He radiates it.
“Alright, kid, I’ll take the bait. What's got you so happy? Some convention got you excited?,” Rossi asks jokingly.
“I’m married,” Reid replies softly. Rossi chuckles
“Oh yeah? To what book?,” he jokes, assuming Spencer is also joking.
But there you are, his beautiful wife, and the woman he’s longed after for so many years, with a ring on your finger, a matching gold wedding band.
“No book, just me,” you reply softly. You’re both extremely apprehensive, but Reid laces his fingers with yours and smiles. Rossi's look like they’re about to pop out of his head, he’s at a complete loss of words.
“Hey guys - WOAH - are they, are they holding hands? Why are you guys holding hands, is this a prank? Is it april fools - no no it’s like late March it’s not april yet - WAIT, oh my god are those RINGS? Why are you two wearing matching rings, you guys? What’s going on - are you - are you married?? That’s not it right? If this is a prank, I swear it’s not funny anymore” Garcia babbles on. You blush beet red, as now JJ, Prentiss, Derek, and Hotch are all just over the corner looking at the both of you. Spencer is extremely shy and just grips your hand tighter.
“Nope, we’re married,” you reply. Penelope gasps.
“Marrie- MARRIED?? HOW ARE YOU TWO MARRIED?? When did you even start dating - you haven’t even been dating - WAIT… have you two been dating??,” Everyone else just sort of nods in agreement, Prentiss and JJ are shocked, and Derek has the biggest grin on his face. Hotch smiles.
“It’s um - complicated,” you reply, stuttering. Mostly because you and Spencers excuse to see eachother was sex, because if it was feelings it’d get serious. So like clockwork it was having sex, and a lot of it all the time. If anything you were friends with benefits but how do you explain that to your boss.
‘Oh my god, you guys,” Prentiss has a whine in her tone, “how long?,” she asks.
“3 years?,” you reply Meekly. Everyone gasps and you jump back in surprise.
“WOW! 3 years Pretty Boys been getting laid by a beautiful lady and not a word, you know what they say pus-” Morgan starts.
“Morgan,” Hotch reprimands. Derek laughs and gets quiet.
“Oh, Spence..” JJ’s the first one to get emotional, she rushed over to give him a hug and part of Y/N is aware that she’s probably known for the longest while known. After they hug, JJ turns to you and hugs you and the whole team showers you all in love.
“Okay, okay - now that all thats over, there is no way in hell I’m allowing you two to just get married and have us not be at the reception. We’re throwing it at my house, so you better take some time off and get a dress for us, and you Spencer, shave your damn face and get suit alright? Congratulations, both of you,” Rossi says. The two of you laugh and nod
“Thanks Rossi, will do,” you reply.
“Congrats Y/N, Reid - and I hate to interrupt this moment but we have a case. I’m assured that you two will not let this interfere with your work?,” he asks the both of you nod, as Garcia heads to the conference room to discuss, mumbling about how betrayed she was as she walked. You and Spence watched as everyone cleared out, to give you privacy
Spencer stands and places a hand on your neck, a soft peck placed on your lips.
“Cmon, Mrs. Reid, lets go work on this case,” he says as he walks. You follow.
And how free you felt.
#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid self insert#spencer reid smut#spencer reid angst#spencer reid fluff#criminal minds imagine#criminal minds self insert#criminal minds#matthew grey gubler
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Instead of letting the school system fuck me jn the ass, after 11 long years of being stuck in it i have finally figured out how to turn that around and fuck the school system in the ass.
Let me explain.
Well, for those lazy like me heres the TLDR version: im using my schools internship program to hangout with the teachers ive become friends with throughout the years instead of because i want to be a teacher. I dont know what i want to do when i grow up, but i am having a grand ole time hanging out with my favorite teachers in the district.
Ans the long version.
Internship is designed for students to check out a prospective career for them and gain experience. And while i have no fucking idea what i want to do with my life i decided to take a teaching internship, and ontop of thwt eith my favorite middle school teacher in the world. We have a great ass time and joke with eachother the whole time im there. Today my actual teacher for internship class (we meet once a week) came to “observe me in my element” and after class ended we were talking and had previously discussed me taking my full day to go maybe to an elementary school and observe for a day. Now, i am also a big band kid and love music. So i just had the most genius idea in the world. Contact my music teacher from elementary school about whats happening and try to take my full day interning there. In a music classroom which i havent experienced in what, 8 years of my life? And i would get to not only hangout with her all day but also see some my elementary school teachers who are still there and im also friends with. The only thing i would have to do in order to make that happen is send off a quick email, have a quick conversation with my actual internship teacher about how i would love to experience some different music bla nla bla and maybe send one or twi more emails saying hi im here come visit and bam im hanging iut with some pretty cool people for a day and am getting an excused absence from school. Hell yea boi
Ive beat the system and just get to hangiut with my friends who are adults while “observing” (which i still do but cmon it sounds cooler when i say yea i leave my school early everyday to hangout with all these cool people and we talk shit and sometimes go to lunch together) and i love being a big kid.
Moral of the story is take every opportunity given and use it to your own advantage.
Play the system bois, once you figure out how to its smooth sailing from there.
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162. // THEN, THEN, NOW
Then: December 18, 2014
Then: December 18, 2015
Now: January 13, 2020 (Damn it would be cool if i answered this last december anyways)
1. Where was the last place you went to hang out? Do you hang out there often? If not, where do you usually go?
THEN: i can’t actually remember HAHA. maybe 7-eleven or something, yeah.
THEN: at the mall i guess, well not really often, but for the christmas time i guess, since i go shopping with enzo
NOW:i have literally no idea, the last time i was out was to go to school, and i dont think that counts as a hangout, DAMN IM BORING
2. When did you last speak to your best friend of the opposite sex? What did you talk about?
THEN: - Friday, his love life. HAHAHA.
THEN: - yesterday; all kinds of stuff, lol, HAHAHA, but we last discusses about the gift his friends gave him and he was too lazy to read the instructions so i read it for him lol
NOW: yesterday! we were talking about going to the beach
3. Would you rather be called ‘beautiful’ or ‘sexy’? Why?
THEN: - beautiful bc when you say beautiful, it’s kinda all in all, your personality and stuff
THEN: ^^
NOW: WHY PICK ONE, WHY NOT BOTH?
4. Do you think someone is attracted to you?
THEN: probably???
THEN: i honestly have no idea
NOW: yeah
5. When was the last time you used public transport?
THEN: last Friday
THEN: yesterday
NOW: the last time i went out? january 8
6. Are there any flirty messages in your inbox?
THEN: - noooope
THEN: nope
NOW:
7. What age do you think is the right age to lose your virginity? Do you think people are losing it too soon these days? If so, why do you think people feel the need to lose it at a very young age?
THEN: - idrk, maybe when you know your emotionally ready and you have a job bc you need to support your child yourself. yeah, bc sometimes teenagers don’t think about what’s going to happen to them if they got pregnant, what they have in mind is the happiness while doing it or something, idk, maybe bc being not a virgin is a huge part of your life and stuff and they like to brag to others and stuff
THEN: ^^
NOW: hOLY SHIT IM ACTUALLY CRYING AT MY ANSWERS HAHAAHAHAAHA ANYWAYS, LOSING YOUR VIRGINITY DOESNT MEAN GETTING PREGNANT MARGARET, THERE’S CONTRACEPTIVES. OH MY GOD. But sorry for my past self, I won’t say that there’s a right age to lose your virginity? Some who lost them in such an early young age are probably thriving right now? It doesn’t matter? As long as it consensual and you’re in the right mindset of what you’re doing then I don’t see why it’s supposed to matter? Like they say virginity is a social construct, which you just fucking call when you first had sex. I do think people are losing it too soon but I don’t think that’s such a bad thing? It’s a fucking normal thing that humans long. What we should talk about the issue of unwanted pregnancies and sex education. But not the point that wherein really young people are doing it? I really can’t say, I don’t have much statistics. But I do feel like that CERTAIN people need to lose it since being a virgin is now such a big word. Which is what we need to demolish. If we just unhinge that word from it’s meaning then I don’t think everyone would make such a big fuss about it? You’re just another person to have sex for the first time? Congratulations, now everybody, move along?
8. Do you make an effort to be nice to people you dislike? Would you hang around with someone you disliked, if your other friends liked them?
THEN: - yeah. well, me and my friends, dislike the same people so we’re fine
THEN: ^^
NOW: yea, i actually do since i believe that even though you hate somebody else, it’s no excuse to be not nice to them? so i don’t get this plastic thing tbh
9. What’s the closest thing to you that’s green?
THEN: - the couch i’m sitting on right now
THEN: like a placemat i’m sitting on lol
NOW: pillow
10. How exactly are you feeling at this moment? Why do you feel this way?
THEN: - It’s so fucking cold, idk maaaaan. i’’m just rly feeling cold. HAHAHAHAHA. there’s this typhoon in our country and it’s just so cold
THEN: OH GOD, i feel really sick and hot rn and i’ve been coughing all day :—(
NOW: tired, my heart’s kind of hurting from the ashfall probably?
11 So, tell me a bit about your best friend of the opposite sex. Are you strictly just friends, or is there something more between you?
THEN: - ooh, enzo, just in the past question we’re talkiing about his love life bc he broke up with this girl but i think they’re coming together again since they always talk and stuff. so we’re strictly just friends, and i don’t really like to be with him since i think it’s going to destroy our 3 years friendship
THEN: still enzo, i mean this girl i’m talking about, enzo ended finally this may of this year, after lots of on and offs, and he’s not been with anyone since and it’s been the same for us, just friends, we cOOL bFFS 4 lyf
NOW: OH MY GOD. THE GIRL WAS ESTER FUCK ME HAHAAHAHAAHAHHAHAHAHA HOLY SHIT, but it’s cool that enzo’s still my best friend
12. When was the last time you felt severe physical pain? What was the reason for your pain?
THEN: - ooooh, i hit my knee on the edge of my bed. GOOD. it hurts a fuckin lot
THEN: i can’t exactly remember, like severe sooOOoo idk rly
NOW: idk tbh HAHAHAHAHAHA
13 . In your opinion, what makes someone attractive? Be as general or as specific as you like.
THEN: - appearance bc you know that’s the first thing people see and the personality
THEN: well i guess now, it’s kind of both, i mean, sometimes, you look at what he’s doing and and his personality and just look at the appearance next and you can actually consider it sOooOOo
NOW: ummm his mIND OH MY GOD. tbh now that i’m thinking of it very deeply, that’s where his intentions come from, what he thinks of you, what he wants to do for you, how much he loves, IT ALL COMES FROM THERE. SO DAMN. IF YOU’RE BOY A GENIUS. KEEP HIM. BUT LIKE EMOTIONAL AND INTELLECTUAL GENIUS.
14. When things in life start going wrong, are you the kind of person who tends to fall apart, or do you try to stay strong and hold it together?
THEN: i’m kind of mixture of both. HAHAHA.
THEN: ^^ still both lol, depends on the situation
NOW: FALL APART LMAO.
15. Someone tells you that you’re beautiful/good-looking. Do you agree with them?
THEN: - depends on who the person is
THEN: ^^
NOW: i’d say thank you
16. If I came round to your house to have dinner, what would you make for me?
THEN: - oh god i don’t cook soooo.
THEN: ^^
NOW: but who are you?
17. How did you meet the last person you added as a friend on Facebook?
THEN: - i haven’t add anyone on fb so idk
THEN: i haven’t added someone for a long long time, prolly a teacher in my school for school purposes too
NOW: i have no idea who i last added on facebook. damn. so that’s still me after 5 years wow.
18. What is your relationship with your mother like? Is it a close relationship, or do you distance yourselves from each other? Why do you think your relationship is the way it is?
THEN: - my relationship with my mom is great, i can talk to her about anything and stuff
THEN: ^^
NOW: yea i guess, we are pretty close but not to the point where i tell her EVERYTHING, that’s just creepy
19. Can you remember the very first conversation you had with the last person you texted?
THEN: - it was kirsten and i met her at 2nd grade bc it was the first day of 2nd grade and i was new andit was a big school, i didn’t know anyone so i cried and she went up to me and asked me why was i crying HAHA
THEN: it was danice, and i honestly can’t remember tbh HAHAHAHAHA, we met in 4th grade
NOW: it was my mom and ofc i can’t remember our first conversation
20. Do you keep up to date with the charts? Are there any songs that are kind of old now, that you still like to listen to?
THEN: - nah, bc, i kinda listen to everything that makes my ears happy. HAHA. yeah.
THEN: ^^
NOW: oh, hell no. i don’t even know what are the bops these days. i’m a grandma when it comes to music.
21. Who or what has been on your mind the most today?
THEN: - christmas. christmas. christmas.
THEN: yes yes yes ^^^
NOW: aw,,, i really do like christmas,,, hehehe, um nothing tbh
22. At what age do you think you’ll be ready to think about having children?
THEN: - maybe like 24-26?
THEN: as long as i’m financially stable then i’m good
NOW: never. having kids.
23. Put your iPod or any music player on shuffle and give me the first two lines from the first 10 songs selected.
THEN:
- ‘Some nights I stay up cashing in my bad luck; Some nights I call it a draw’
- ‘Cecilia, you’re breaking my heart; You’re shaking my confidence daily’
- 'First thing’s first, I’m the realest; Drop this and let the whole world feel it’
- 'Give me more lovin’ than I’ve ever had; Make it all better when I’m feelin’ sad’
- 'Baby, when they look up at the sky; We’ll be shooting stars just passing by’
- 'It’s just another night; And I’m staring at the moon’
- 'It’s probably what’s best for you; I only want the best for you’
- 'Saturday morning jumped out of bed and put on my best suit; Got in my car and raced like a jet, all the way to you’
- 'When your legs don’t work like they used to before; And I can’t sweep you off of your feet’
- 'so let’s sing na, na na na na, hey ya; cmon and sing na, na na na na, hey ya’
THEN:
- ‘I am not that kind of girl, who should be rudely barging in on a white veil occasion’
- ‘And i hate to say i love you, when it’s hard for me’
- ‘Your love is bright as ever, even in the shadows’
- I was born in the arms of imaginary friends, Free to roam, made a home out of everywhere I’ve been’
- ‘ My heart is sinking, As I’m lifting up’
- ‘ Wise men say, only fools rush in’
- ‘ Come on skinny love just last the year, Pour a little salt we were never here’
- ‘ He said, “Let’s get out of this town, Drive out of the city’
- ‘ Hush, don’t speak, When you spit your venom, keep it shut I hate it’
- ‘ I can taste salt water , And if I blink again’
NOW:
OH MY GOD IM LAUGHING AT THOSE ANSWERS OKAY HERE’S MINE
- She's got a family in Carolina, So far away, but she says I remind her of home
- You’re white dress, sparks words spontaneous
- Ain't never felt this way, Can't get enough so stay with me
- After the war, I went back to New York, A-After the war, I went back to New York
- Darling, darling, doesn't have a problem, Lying to herself 'cause her liquor's top shelf
- I wanna pick you up and scoop you out
- I've got a secret for the mad, In a little bit of time it won't hurt so bad
- Mr. Vice President, Mr. Madison, Senator Burr
- You keep saying that you’re alright, but I can see you through your fake smile you’re not
- 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9, There are 10 things you need to know
24. The last time you went for a night out, who did you go with?
THEN: - i don’t rly go on night outs but maybe the last one will be last october 28 wt my friends
THEN: i still don’t go on night outs, well i mean, the latest i came home this month was 10:30 and i was out christmas shopping with enzo so
NOW: my college blockmates i think?
25. Do you know anyone who doesn’t use Facebook, or dislikes it? Do you like or dislike it?
THEN: - yeah, one of my best friends, laya, she hates it HAHA but we need to use it for school stuff. and laya actually keeps an eye on things, she wants not to be noticed on fb and stuff HAHA. i don’t really dislike it but i don’t love it either
THEN: well laya has not been ranting about fb and she’s been using it a lot for chat purposes so, as of now, i don’t know anyone
NOW: i don’t think so, neither
26. Have you ever mistaken a complete stranger for someone you knew?
THEN: - yeah, but i think, i haven’t came to them (*i came to them, 2020) and said hi HAHA
THEN: yeah
NOW: yea
27. What did you have for breakfast this morning?
THEN: - just bread and peanut & butter, and i’m rly hungry rn
THEN: well i got out of bed like 3:36 or something, and there was no food so i ate this good large bread HAHAHAHAH and just some nerds and chocolate and that’s all the food i’ve eaten today and it’s 8:40 already and i haven’t had a proper meal yet, i’m really hungry
NOW: tocino
28. Have you ever made a promise to someone that you didn’t keep?
THEN: - yeah, i think we all have
THEN: yeah
NOW: yeah
29. Are you ever afraid to show how you feel?
THEN: - yeah, i’m always afraid
THEN: ^^ yep, i am still
NOW: depends on who i am with
30. Have you ever been blamed or got into trouble for something that wasn’t your fault?
THEN: - yeah
THEN: yeah
NOW: yeah
31. Have you ever wondered what death might be like, and what might happen afterwards? It’s depressing to think about I know, but do you have an opinion about it?
THEN: - yeah, oh my gods, it’s just so confusing; what would the people feel if i died and stuff, and what would happen to me, would i still see my friends and stuff
THEN: i’ve been reading a lot of books associated with death, i guess, and it’s making me think more, and i guess, it’s just sleeping forever and it’s quite creepy
NOW: yea of course, i don’t really have an opinion about it? but i do wonder what happens next? do you really lose unconsciousness and just drift away?
32. Tell me something you like about your life, and something you dislike about it.
THEN: - oh god, it’s gotten pretttty chaotic, i’m miserable and depressed and confused than before
THEN: my life rn has beeeen a complete mess, GOD, i don’t like it. i really feel down and i mean being on christmas break is actually heping me a lot sine there
NOW: i honestly can’t think of one things that’s going in the right direction at the moment, yesterday I was fucking crying my eyes out and promised myself to get checked as soon as I can.
33. Choose 10 people at random.
THEN:
1. Ysabel
2. David
3. Enzo
4. Ester
5. Laya
6. Earl
7. Pamela
8. Nica
9. Kirsten
10. Kris
THEN:
1. Kirsten
2. Enzo
3. Laya
4. Danice
5. David
6. Hannah
7. Pamela
8. Ricafort
9. Ysabel
10. Vito
NOW:
1. Kirsten
2. Raphael
3. Enzo
4. Kate
5. Derick
6. Aly
7. Cely
8. Miki
9. Joui
10. Vanessa
34. Do you think 1 would ever help you out if you were in trouble?
- i hope so
NOW: yea
35. Would you swap places with 2 for a week?
- sure, HAHAHA
NOW: HELL NO.
36. What would you say if 3 asked you out?
- yea sure HAHA
NOW: sure
37. Who is taller, you or 4?
- i have no idea, i think she is
NOW: she is
38. Do you think 5 has ever lied to you?
- yeah, probably
NOW: i dont think so?
39. Do you think 6 will ever get married?
- yeah, why not
NOW: yea
40. If you had to cook a meal for 7, what would you make?
- i did the numbers random, and it ended up on pamela again HAHAHAHAA but still, bacon HAHA, the only thing i can make that she likes
NOW: PANCIT CANTON HAHAAHAHHA
41. Do you think 8 will ever get married?
- yeah.
NOW: yea
42. If 9 turned up at your door now, what would you do/say? Would you let him/her in?
- YA YA YA
NOW: yea
43. When is 10’s birthday?
- o god, i’m not rly sure lol, prolly april???? i’M SO SORRY VITO
NOW: september 18
44. Have you ever felt jealous of 1?
- yeah, i guess, but not that much
NOW: yea i guess at some aspects like being rich lmao.
45. If 2 decided never to speak to you again, would you care?
- OH GOD YES
NOW: OF COURSE I WOULD OH MY GOD
46. What colour is 3’s hair?
- black and brown
NOW: black
47. Do you know what colour 4’s eyes are?
- black
NOW: black
48. When was the last time you talked to 5? What did you talk to him/her about?
- yesterday, not much
NOW: january 7 in chat, january 11.
49. Who has kissed the most people, you or 6?
- we haven’t kissed anyone yet HAHAHA
NOW: OMG I ACTUALLY HAVE NO IDEA!!! i feel like me? but still no idea
50. What is the age difference between you and 7? Who is older?
- she’s older. but i’m still taller HAHAHAHA
NOW: she is
51. Describe 8 - what does he/she look like?
- oh, he’s dark brown, laya and i LOVEEEE his legs, it’s smooth, he has a pretty strong feminine side and he has a subtle curly hair, his teeth are quite crooked and HE’s REALLY FUNNY
NOW: REALLY SMALL GIRL WITH A SMALL FACE and long hair and such a petite frame
52. Is 9’s house within walking distance?
- no, it’s near our school and our school is 30 minutes away without traffic from our house
NOW: NO WAY
53. What if you found out that 10 had sex with the person you love/like?
- OH MY GOD well, starting they’re not gay and stuff but if it happened, i would just be shocked
NOW: HOLY SHIT THAT IS PRETTY AND VERY UNLIKELY BUT HOLY SHIT. THAT’S VERY WEIRD SCENARIO TO PICTURE
54. Do you like your teeth?
THEN: - i don’t love them but i don’t hate them either
THEN: i hate it
NOW: hate it
55. Have you ever been to the cinema to watch a film, and ended up walking out because you hated it?
THEN: - nope
THEN: i have never done it, it’s just like wasting money and why watch a film when you know you wouldn’t like it
NOW: UGH NEVER, if you don’t like it then just sleep? it’s cozy in there
56. The last person you held hands with, is that person single?
THEN: - it was carl, but we’re just friends, and it was a joke, and yes he’s single
THEN: i can’t even remember
NOW: no he’s not
57. How about the last person you messaged on Facebook, are they single?
THEN: - yep
THEN: yes
NOW: nope
58. How old is the 11th person in your phone’s contacts list?
THEN: - i have no idea
THEN: - still have no idea
NOW: i don’t know tbh, her late 20′s?
59. Does it bother you when people ask questions about your love life?
THEN: - nah
THEN: not rly since i have non HAHAHAHA
NOW: not really
60. Does the last person you kissed have freckles?
THEN: - nope
THEN: i haven’t kissed anyone yet so
NOW: nope
61. Is it easy for people to tell when you’re upset, or are you good at hiding it?
THEN: i have resting bitch face so people always think i’m mad or something
THEN: ^^
NOW: I DONT HAVE A FUCKING RBF WHO WAS I KIDDING!!! OH MY GOD. i’m not good at hiding when im upset.
62. Have you ever thought about joining a dating site?
THEN: - oh gods, idek. i really have no idea HAHAHA. but yeah lol
THEN: sure why not lol, but i always thought about it being very awkward
NOW: already did
63. On a scale of 1 to 10, how you would you rate your own appearance (going on how you look right now)?
THEN: probably 6 lol. i look oily and my hair looks awful right now
THEN: prolly a 7, because i feel like ‘I LOOK REALLY OKAY AND THIS IS NOT WHAT I LOOK LIKE WHEN THERE’S PEOPLE AROUND
NOW: OH HOLY SHIT OH MY GOD A SOLID ZERO.
64. On a scale of 1 to 10, how happy are you right now?
THEN: a 5, i just found out that my crush wants to bring evrything back gdi (Oh my GOD, HE DID NOT WANT EVERYTHING BACK, 2020)
THEN: a 6, i guess
NOW: 7????
65. On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate this survey?
THEN: - like a 7?
THEN: ^^
NOW: ^^
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