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monsterqueers · 2 years

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Semi-Liveblog of Xenogears

Finally getting around to this crunchy 1998 jrpg, watching it on youtube because ive been told the UI and game mechanics are really ass in places, this will be copypasted from my carefully largely spoiler free discord ramblings to my platonic partner in batches so no spam.

I know a few spoilers for this that were specifically why I wanted to witness it- IE that I can ‘Same Neurotype!’ a character, and its Really Dark. The Mindfuck stuff goes without saying its the monolithsoft staff.

Copypaste from last night under the cut

Ohhh man the screen resolution and menu sound effects very crunchy ps1 shit The low res anime&cgi cutscenes with 90s dub voices... -chefs kiss- Very crunchy Man I think I recognize this fucking random extras voice.

(...)

but the dubbing pool of voices in 98 was pretty small so chances are I HAVE heard it but oh man this is a tense moment and the VAs sound like they are discussing the weather this is great

-juicy Space Bullshit happening- Some dude: Im evacuating the ship (said like im ordering coffee)

The graphics are pretty impressive for the ps1 I think. The cgi is hysterical tho Im sure it looked better on a crt tv because the spacing and blurring or the lights makes the shading look less fucky on a lot of older stuff The detail on the 2d animation is really good tho for a ps1 anime custscene

oh naked lady dubiously censored naked lady yes this is a xeno game there must be boobie. Contextless boobie Oh man now I gotta read a lot of white text on black screen lol but the music is nice never heard it but it sounds nostalgic 'look at this cute village with cute music!' ok 'it is now on fire!' That sounds about right oh my fffuninkg god that screen transition windows movie maker shit ohhh yes this is good the screen is still wobbling and flashing oh lord the eyestrain lol

First thing the protagonist does is swear we are getting off to an excellent start Awwwe he paints thats cute

oh god the iu direction hud THATS AWFUL(complementary) thats very 90s 00 Weird Shit Before They Codified Whats Expected With A Hud design

Fei(Protagonist) has a sparse room with just a fuckton of art supplies in it where he seems to be only drawing self insert fanfic lol. Hes got his priorities in order. oh man that low poly cow

They did good to make a fully 3d 'move the camera around' game in 98, as low poly as it is I can see the 'sort of squeezing out everything you can out of the game engine' effort that went into xc1 in this

This girl and also this whole village totally has death flags I can smell it on them they are to happy and cosy Fei dodging conversation he doesnt wanna have like Naked Dunban

Oh what the shit you can talk to an npc while you talk to another npc??? lmao CRUNCHY gameplay that sounds like you can cause problems for the ui and fill the screen with textboxes I hope they thought of that and don let let you endlessly add more text boxes this town music really sounds like music ive heard a million times before for hours but I know ive never played this game maybe its background music for some video essayist or something very cosy tho

KITTY OMG IF YOU TALK TO THE CAT IT MEOWS??? CAT SPOTTED AND IT IS ALSO GREEN FOR SOME REASON KITTY KITTY they better not kill the cat (they will probably kill the cat) you can make him(the protagonist not the cat) jump in a well for no reason lol OH PUN "'well' done! you found an item!" "Alls well that ends well." Ok this is a good localization

'bearcows' Oh so that isnt a cow its some fucked up chimera thing oH GOD ITS MOUTH OPENS LIKE A BEAR GOT IT OK

its got canines..... This animal is almost certainly one of the most dangerous.... Bulls kill so many people every year and this one has TEETH

'We got -list of a bunch of combo fruits and veggies- and turnips!' turnips, the universal constant I guess

no dont drink fertilizer fei apparently drinking miracle gro will heal you Dont Worry About It

The space lazer sounds for messing around in the menu lol

There is just no combat tutorial AT ALL HA oh hes got voice acted lines in battle lol!!! Thats a higher voice than I expected

completely incomprehensible battle hud fans really werent lying there it is Super Crunchy Can barely read this lol and at the speed the person playing is buzzing through it I cant tell if its turn based or not Dont know what that bar is either I THINK its turn based with a time limit? Yeah seems to be Head so hard you can kill a wolf by headbutting it I guess sorry its a two tailed jackal lol thats cool monster design tho

its a chicken in the house how cute! -talks to the chicken and it makes a horrible staticky noise- ah Fei, while pleasant bg music plays: hm wonder where the doctor is :) -explosion noise- -all music stops-

found him!

Ah yes For No Particular Reason This Is Shaped Like A Cross And Has A Winged Person Statue In It

This game is under NO CIRCUMSTANCE epilepsy or motion sickness friendly lol

Also yes the windows movie maker wobbly screen effect is EXACTLY what dissociation feels like thats right.

Knowing the special spoiler that I do about this game makes this part unintentionally funny. Dude its your alter. Crack ur plural egg. The childs VOICE ACTOR OH MY GOD LMAOOO OOF Things are already going ‘fun’ directions

Oh I think im getting whats going on with combat, you do fucking button combos in your turn??? is that whats going on? Oh GOD the platforming..... Oh thats the real content warning for this game.... Oh wow. Thats really bad. oh! Is that a conlang or another real language I cant tell its cool has anyone tried to make a language bible for it if its a conlang? conversations like Fei: If ur gonna kill me at least try to aim for the vitals attempted murderer: What The Fuck We finally get a full name for our protag! Rejoice! HAHAHAHHA OH MY GOD WHO IS THE MCS VOICE ACTOR LMAO OH MY GOD THIS IS VERY MUCH EARLY DUB HMGJFDjgh

oh hey his va was an extra in avatar the last airbender

The voice cracks in the kid version of the character ohhh my god this is excellent horrible 00s english dub

the music is really good though very nice atmosphere

Yeah it seems to be different button presses use some energy on the bar and you combo them in an attempt to puzzle that together for your turn with some combos being special and will do lots of damage or something???

Also you can really hear the music vibe being very xenoseries. Them violins set to mental break downs <3

'the lip synch in xc2 is bad' Observe Xenogears Lip Synching in the anime cutscenes Oh man its Bad Lip Synching (in a good way)

wow thats a lot more blood than theyd get away with in a t rated game today! well its 2d so probably actually thats fine but

Jesus christ Feis english VA is unintentionally hilarious Its a 14 year old anime boy voice and hes Beefy Like it would be one thing if it was a good 14 year old boy voice, but it sounds like a grown man trying(badly) to do a 14 year old boy voice for a beefy man which is why its funny good thing hes mostly crying and screaming in the cutscenes and not talking

Random t rex in a xeno game we meet again!

LMAO deus es helicopter

Dropkicking sharks in the desert... Yes. Normal activities

Ahhh yes, time for the talking about god again! This is a xenogame AND a jrpg after all. Gods are hunted for sport. I think I kinda like the 1.25 speed versions of some of these songs more than the regular version but that might be because ive now listened to them that way for 2 hours

Oh yeah this is a game that if you played high would be a very bad time. Some real mindfuck shit is happening (complementary) HIM! The dude the internet really likes! Blonde himbo spotted! BART XENOGEARS,,,

wow the doctor guy can do a full split his wife must like that

HHHEXCUSE ME???!?! Word for word quote: 'Is there anyone who is almost dead, with no arms and legs, or in need of an abdominal operation!? No one...? Well that's depressing..."

LMAOOOO We found a dude in a cave who doesnt believe in evolution and thinks space aliens brought humans to the planet and hes probably right lets be real this is a jrpg. (edited) Guy In A Cave: -proceeds to belt out straight up bible stories when asked about what ‘myth’ he believes in- Ok this is a xeno game he is almost certainly right if hes yelling about god

Just three dudes in a cave, two himbos with hair past their ass and an old man yelling about god and his skull collection. Lovely.

There is one brain cell in the party and our other guy has it who isnt in the party right now. We are talking to the old dude. We should not be talking to an old dude who collects human skulls even if he is friendly but thats just me

This customization menu is atrocious oh wow INCREDIBLE,,,

Wow Bart really is proto-Zeke from xc2 no wonder xenofans are rabid for himbos. WHY must the customization window zoom to the asscheeks of the not-gundams every time you refuel them What, are we piping fuel up the robots asshole? Is that whats happening?

Oh new himbo is kind to children no wonder people think hes husband material lol

-insert 'sand is coarse and rough and gets everywhere' star wars joke here- also new guy has pirate music and pirates are cool so like.

its a fucking prOJECTOR HEHEHEHEH LIke the ones that project light on a viewscreen from above omg you can taste the 00s

Man I can see exactly why xenogears people are so obsessed with Bart. Pretty, beefy, friendly but distinctly weird to mildly unhinged, pirate-cowboy-prince, whips. wait a minute wait a minute. Robots, mindfuckery, sad protagonist who Doesnt want To Get in The Robot.... When did NGE come out old on- I thought so it came out in ‘95 I feel this is a bit of a love letter to NGE

omg omg Bart does a little hopping animation when hes excited thats adorable

does... does this bad guy really just straight up have a giant cross tattooed on his face??? Theres heavyhanded symbolism and then theres whatever that is (edited)

ok I have to stop watching these and go to bed but thots so far: - The fandom darling is as good as advertised. Excellent man lemmie give him a headpat I want to eat him like a croissant. - Charming and Weird And Fucked Up in equal measure which is good - You can smell the crunchy 90s sci-fi emanating from this game(complementary) - The music sounds deeply nostalgic like ive heard it for hours a million times before but ive 100% never heard any of this game. Good stuff. - I am intrigued how the funny 'jump in the well' gag has progressed from funny pun hole with items in it if you jump down it a few times into using a well to sneak into some shitheads lair and unkidnap a little girl. Wonder if this is gonna keep being a thing.

#xenogears #liveblog #wayward rambling #xenogears lb #theres some spoilers in here ig

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kinosternon · 2 years

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did you like the free! movie? i read your summary which obviously isnt equivalent to wayching the movie but i felt…idk. if youre ok sharing your thoughts on it?

Honestly? I really liked it, but also they're very much movies where what you're hoping to get out of them can play a big role in how enjoyable they are.

If you enjoy your dynamics gen and/or multiship-flavored, for example, then this was just. An absolutely fantastic film. 10/10 no notes. If you want resolution or confirmation about, well, basically anything, on the other hand, it's going to be very disappointing.

The character work was admirable—especially for the minor characters, many of whom continued to get development literally up to the final moments of the film. I absolutely loved all the new relationships that we started to see get off the ground, as well as call-backs to previous interactions throughout the series that showed growth in the characters involved. Not only that, but new stakes were introduced and explored relatively well, and most of all they introduced more drama and tension while sacrificing as little character growth as possible.

There are two big exceptions to this, for me...

(spoilers below the cut)

...and they are Haruka and Makoto.

After mostly having his shit together in parts of Dive to the Future, Haruka lost a fair bit of ground, emotionally speaking. But I think the movie justifies that well—it's a return to deep-seated questions that he's never quite figured out how to answer about who he is and his place in the world, on top of the new stressors he's facing. Admittedly, the answer he comes to is a bit more of a postponement than a real answer, but it also feels true to where he is at this point in his life.

Makoto, though...well. Not only did MakoHaru get on-screen development only through flashbacks, but Makoto just let everything that was happening in the movie...happen. Even Hiyori was more active in Ikuya's arc than Makoto was in Haruka's this time around. Coming from the decision Makoto made about his own career path in Dive to the Future, some of this stuff feels like a pretty big step back.

But honestly? I'm okay with that, too.

Side note that's related—I was really happy with how Rin was handled throughout. I've never quite been a RinHaru shipper, but this was the first time in the entire series when I could actually feel good about their dynamic, either romantically or platonically. And the fact that so much of that development was focused on conflict resolution is a key ingredient to figuring out what KyoAni gave focus, here.

I suspect it'll absolutely frustrate some folks, but to me, the success of the early stages of certain interactions while neglecting or even regressing on the deeper relationships is telling. These last few seasons/films have been about showing how the boys have learned to grow beyond misunderstandings, hostility, and damaging competitiveness and learn to trust themselves and each other enough to maintain a tenuous sense of emotional stability in their lives. But that doesn't mean that they know how to grow further than that, yet—how to start building lives, or full-fledged identities, that they can be happy with. One of the major plot points is whether they can (or want to) even look a year into the future, for crying out loud, and that's just in terms of their careers!

Free! was never going to be a series that explicitly acknowledged any of the romantic (and even many of the more deeply platonic) undertones it harbors. Considering that, I kind of feel the way they chose to have Makoto obviously underplay his feelings, fears, and care for Haruka throughout the film was...I don't know, it just felt right for their current trajectories.

Haruka is explicitly balancing self-preservation against a desire to compete, with his sense of self suspended precariously between those two things. That doesn't exactly leave a lot of room for building relationships with others, and indeed a lot of Haruka's emotional work in this movie is about his relationship with himself as well as with other people more generally. He's just not in a place to acknowledge other people's deeper feelings for him just yet. (Makoto aside, I'm including Rin and Ikuya, and in a limited sense, Kaede in this. Possibly Albert, but Albert also couldn't emotions his way out of a paper bag, so it's kind of a moot point. Oh and technically Ryuuji counts, too, as Haruka's mentor.)

(And man, don't even get me started on the decision to include Haruka's mother in the way they did. That's...just...gah. I have probably uncharitable opinions on that one that will probably show up in fic form sooner or later.)

Makoto, meanwhile, is stuck being as afraid of his feelings about Haruka as he is of actual threats to Haruka's well-being, and that leaves him at a pretty harsh impasse. Would Haruka be okay with him putting his own life on hold to help him with rehabilitation for a year? No he would not. Overall, I think he's making the rational choice in consciously to step back (at least in terms of physical distance) and put his own needs and plans first, because he's absolutely been a little too dependent on his role as Haruka's guardian/caretaker in the past, even if the show's never come out and explicitly said this. (Hiyori and Ikuya were absolutely a cautionary tale about it, though, and one that I think Makoto took to heart.)

As to where they're at emotionally, this movie shows a pattern pretty clearly. Makoto defaults to praising Haruka's swimming to hide his feelings, and Haruka accepts that without questioning it. One of them is going to need to break that default someday, whether for romantic reasons or simply for the sake of their overall emotional health...but they're just not ready to yet.

But, again, as awkward and painful a part of their emotional development as that is, it was portrayed really honestly. Better still, it left open-ended, with plenty of implications for future development. (It would have been so easy for them to include an epilogue with random new characters paired off with existing ones, and that didn't happen even once. I'm very, very grateful for that.)

So I guess the biggest takeaway here, and my biggest praise for this film, is that it really is a fan's free-for-all from this point onward. Personally speaking, I really couldn't ask for anything more interesting.

#free! the final stroke second part #spoilers #haruka nanase #and the people who care about him #that's the main focus of this rant bc it was a major driver of the film #don't get me wrong there was SO MUCH ELSE TOO #but there's frankly just too many characters and too much going on to cover it all in just one post #and that's one of the things I liked about the movie!#it was...intricate #in a good way #thanks for asking!!#I could write essays on this stuff (obviously)

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misterradio · 6 days

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OUUURRRRHHHHHGHHH I FINISHED READING SHINGO [spoilers ahead i just want 2 babble about stuff]

💥💥🤖💥💥

WTFFFF I wanted there to be resolution sooooooo bad WTF !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MARIN!!!!!!!!! AND MIKI AND SHIZUKA (i hope im remembering her name) AND SATORU........!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND SHINGO.... !!!!!!!!!

THAT WAS TRULY a bonkers manga and it was so fun but also violent in a kind of wretched way (theres so much death, even children????!!!??)... it was really interesting to follow this machine and everyone it touched (good and bad).....

there was all this crazy conspiracy stuff happening i wouldve loved to know more about, like why was shingo making products that were like, poisonous by nature? and people being affected by shingo in strange ways? were the little motor thingies he was makign really also doubling as a weapon??? how????? it doesnt have to make sense actually theres a lot of stuff thats really out there.

UM BUT I REALLY WANTED MARIN AND SATORU TO REUNITE..... [BAWLS] im actually really shocked they didnt..... made the ending super bleak....

i cant believe we left marin in the middle of the facking desert for real. hello. <- okay not really but like how is she supposed 2 get back to her home. i feel so bad for her that that wretched boy robin was gaslighting her to shit and making her life literally a living hell..... GGRRRRR!!!!!

one thing that was funny and mystifying to me is that sometimes a chapter would end and shingo would be in a new location. chapter break now we are on a ship. now we are in the desert. now were in japan again. HOW

there was a lot of very strange trippy things happening and to be quite honest im not sure if some of that was real or not. like shingo reaching humanity for an instant i think was more of a state of mind and not a physical change but what was that...

i thought shingo's degradation was interesting and how he began to communicate less and less and only with smaller and smaller animals that was interesting... but why did other machines start to hate him.... maybe they knew that machines creating evil things were making machinery as a whole disliked and hated him for it, even though he didnt want to be making weird evil things..... even though he was just making agricultural equipment motors? that were also maybe radioactive weapons? this is confusing.

anyways. super surreal and a fun read. well some of it isnt fun on account of the wretched violence but overall. super intriguing...... i luv u shingo and miki i hope that wherever they are they are still friends 🥺... and marin and satoru too 🥺.... i love everyone mwah

#original nonsense #personal #🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺😭😭😭😭😭

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milkweedman · 2 years

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ive been under the impression that i’m Immune to lace rot because i physically can’t work with such small yarn or needles or hooks for more than a few minutes before my hands are dead

but the bobbin lace.... it’s been calling to me .......

#im less interested in making lacy shawls anyway but making edgings or inserts to sew onto other clothes ? yes please #and bobbin lace seems ideal for that .... and i have a ton of super thin yarn i will never use otherwise ....#heard you can do it with clothespins and blocking pins and a firm pillow ... i have all of those things...#i am also resolutely NOT doing that because i dont have time right now and i want to try tabletweaving #but also omg ... i need lace. i NEED lace that isnt the weird polyester shit they sell for 2.99$ at joanns #so yeah. i think im less immune to lace rot than i've been hoping #lace rot #chronic illness

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lillian-nator · 2 years

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Lilliannn I'm boreddddd

Do you have anything you wanna share?? From your aus or something new? -a(no)n [I'm missing my friends party bc covid rates are way too high :/ ]

this was actually written by me and eyemotif

so give them TONS of the credit for this, they're fucking genius man

OKAY THE AU

OKAY

its about starving artists Tommy and Wilbur

they live in NYC

in like this tiny fucking gross ass apartment

they have two very small bedrooms, and one bath, and a kitchen / livingroom in one room

Tommy is a writer

Wilbur is a musician

they're both composing their masterpeices

I dont have background for Wilbur yet

but I know that he didnt come from much

he isnt in contact with his parents really, they dont support the starving artist lifestyle

and I think he probably moved far from like, not the south, but further north

like massachusettes or new hampshire or something

Tommy however? an interesting backstory

but all of Tommy's funds are frozen until he's 21 as most trust funds are

so, he has to make due with what he has

selling all of his flashy watches and too-big suits for rent money

he meets wilbur when he sees Wilbur's ad for a roommate wanted

but instead of using his dads connections

Tommy does what he always did

write.

he writes and writes and writes and hopes that something is good enough

because knowing tommy nothing was ever good enough

but ever since he learned how to write, its all that he did

He writes until his back aches from his horrible posture and eyes burn from the blue light in a dark room

and he can hear wilbru writing in the otehr room

writing and writing and playing and making a masterpeice

and all that Tommy can think is "how did he ever function without these beautiful symphonies playing the soundtrack to his life"

And Tommy will never stifle Wilbur’s creativity

He tries not

But god dammit Wilbur it is 3am and he has just found the resolution he was looking for

Shut up man

Wilbur just laugh back at the angry thumps through the wall

I think Tommy works at retail

I think retail is good

I think retail is great actually, because it gives him enough boredom and monotony to hate it a lot

and to make him write even more feverently

he keeps a notebook on him at all times

writes little stories about every person he sees

Tommy is the kind of guy to speak really poetically

eloquently if you will

everything is shakesperian, he's a big romantic, TommyInnit is

big guy for the dramatics

and he hates the silence

hates it so much

he feels like he always has this static in his brain

the like fucking macy's he works at, the music there makes his head ache

but it provides background sound, which is what he needs

now WIlbur's music

the wonderful concert to his frantic composition

just to get every word down onto the paper

Prose and poetry

Tommy is Prose

Wilbur is Poetry

Dichotomy y’know

and their small dirty ass apartment is just filled with notebooks and papers and pens and shit

And what Tommy hates most is that there are people like wilbur, with unimaginable talent, who cant afford to pay rent, and who just have to waste their lives away doing stuffy business jobs like his dad, and they're out in the world and they could be making the next fucking revolutionary musical or work of literature - THEYRE ARTISTS, and they cant do shit with the talent that god gave them

and they're eating cornflakes for 2 out of 3 meals a day

and the apartment is a mess

and they barely payed rent

but god

Just thinking about Tommy moving in

And it’s this apartment and it’s so shitt

And that night, over ramen, Wilbur asks “so what’re you doing here? Like, why New York, what’s the dream?”

And Tommy goes “well, I’d like to survive, but more so, I’d like to write”

“Music?”

“Fuck no, the - the next greatest piece of literature”

“Ah - big man”

And I think Wilbur gets really excited for being like, the elder artist, like he gets to show Tommy the best spots in New York

Sharing all of his inspiration tips

What he does to get out of writer’s block

Wilbur calling Tommy Rich boy even though Tommy doesn’t have access to all his money

“Oh come on Rich Boy, up you go, mandatory break!”

Tommy hits a writer’s block and suddenly it is Wilbur’s problem

Wilbur he wants to go feed the ducks Wil

Willllllll

Come onnnnnn

And Wilbur’s hair is stuck up from rubbing his hands through it

And his eyes are watery from staring at his sheet music did so long

“Insufferable child, do I look like I am fit for the public eye?”

“Look as ugly as usual! Duck time!”

Wilbur’s a little off his rocker

It comes with being a starving musician for 4 years

He is willing to do anything for his at

Art*

He never sleeps

He sacrifices himself for his art

He could’ve survived death and the first thing he did would be to write some lyrics down

Tommy sees that shit and while he respects it he also goes “I think the fuck not, sleep time you pretentious motherfucker”

Wilbur hasn’t slept for 72 hours, and goes “no no no no no I just got this vocal part, please”

“You have half an hour.”

And then half an hour, he goes “no Tommy please” and Tommy goes “You’re delirious you duck”

And push him face down onto his bed

Wilbur is kind of pretentious though

His art is sacred

But also Wilbur’s the type of guy to pull Tommy up onto the roof, both of them still in their thin work uniforms, and it’s like a crisp January air, snow on the ducking ground, and Wilbur’s just laughing his ass off

And Tommy goes “it’s fucking frigid up here you insane man!”

Be Wilbur’s just still laughing, running his hands through his hair

And going “ITS BEAUTIFUL ISNT IT?”

And Tommy just

Exasperatedly sighs

Fondly even

Cause his insane, unhinged, BEST friend, is showing him the New York sunset, and hes looking at his best friends muse

And it’s beautiful

Wilbur is brilliant

And there’s no way that Wilbur doesn’t get inspired by Tommy

This kid who is so desperately brilliant and empathetic

In a way that so many people Are Not

Wilbur is up with Tommy after two days of writing benders to see the boy frazzled and frantic

Ranting and raving about the shame of their society

How so many artists will remain undiscovered and repressed by the societal need for conformity

And Wilbur sees the fire in his eyes

The frantic anger on behalf of people he’s never met

He’s inspired

Nothing specific but he takes the fire Tommy hands him and guards it with his heart

Fuels it

AND The idea ofa writing bender is something I never knew I needed

Because as much as they make the other take care of themself they also enable each other

Throwing unwrapped granola bars at the other so they don’t have to get up

They don’t sleep for days at a time

Ordering Taco Bell they can’t really afford right now

When they hit a wall they use each other as sounding boards

Even if the other isn’t listening

They’ll rant and rave and plot and plan

Tommy will suggest things to Wilbur “could you play something a little sadder? I think it may help.”

There’s always two responses

Well three

Silence - He’s too absorbed

And “of course Tom”

And then “piss off im onto something”

The living room is just the writing room at this point

They have Liek three friends outside of each, put together but they never go to their apartment

It’s frankly a wreck

it’s such a wreck

Wilbur’s keyboard is in the middle of the room

And Tommy writes on this like little love seat that has so many holes

And there’s papers all over the floor

And wires everywhere

And when Tommy’s eyes get big

And his hair shakes with his head

And he’s sending up on the couch

And he’s asking “Wilbur Wilbur so listen to me hear -“

And Wilbur continues playing the piano

Now a theme to Tommy’s frantic rambling

And I feel as though Wilbur has like this obsession

About fulfilling something while he’s young

To make it while he’s still young and thin and good looking

And while he can still hold his liquor

He wants to make it while he’s still in his youth

He doesn’t want to keep doing this starving artist shit through his 30s

Like he has this fire under his ass, and he feels like time is running out and he has to do it now

He’s like terrified of getting looser

Older*

Taking a quote from Tick Tick Boom, Wilbur wants to be a writer who waits tables, not a waiter with a hobby

If he doesn’t do this now, then he’ll never get to

Wilbur has this flame under his ass that Tommy has in his heart and they fuel each other magnificently

And maybe they’ll go out in a blaze of glory

But they most definitely will Not Die Out

That’s Wilbur’s like saying

Like he wants to go out in a blaze of glory

He wants to set fire to everything around him

Cause mass destruction

Which is,, a little dramatic Wilbur

I just love the idea of Wilbur lik running on the fear of getting older

The fear of getting irrelevant and shit

Like he has to do something great NOW or it’s never gonna happen

Which is why he’s so frantic about it

Gives him a little spice

And then there’s Tommy

Who’s full of energy and passion and youth

And Wilbur just FEEDS off that energy

And Wilbur’s like 22 man

Like he’s still so young

But he’s so adamant about getting more time

So much so that Tommy asks once like “are you fucking dying or something man?”

And Wilbur’s answer is “well we’re all dying, and it’s poetic sure, but it’s what makes everything beautiful, knowing that you won’t always be here to experience it”

and Tommy’s like “my brilliant, so so mentally ill, wilbru”

Wilbur snorts

“ like you’re not just as mentally ill”

“I’m angry sure, but I’m also young. As far as I’m aware, I’ll live forever.”

Wilbur just pushes Tommy’s head and ruffles his hair

“You lovely, lovely idiot.”

“Oi! Who’re you calling an idiot! I’m brilliant, asshole!

Bro I just okay

So like for the first six months of Wilbur and Tommy living together Tommy never told Wilbur his age

At first it was caution

And then it was like an inside joke

And so like Wilbur always assumed Tommy was like 20

And then like 6ish months into them staying together, Wilbur comes home with a 6 pack, as he does during their little writing sessions sometimes

And Tommy grabs one, and immediately like uncaps it with a little bottle opener keychain thing

And starts drinking it, and Wilbur’s laughing and gets his own

And Wilbur goes “so how illegal has this been, just give me a range?”

And Tommy goes “I’m 18”

And Wilbur like chokes on his beer, “IVE BEEN GIVING BEER TO A TEENAGER-“

“I would’ve gotten it myself dumbass. You’re just my en-ay-buh-ler”

Wilbur like doesn’t care after like another 20 minutes when he’s struck with inspiration

It’s not like he would’ve denied Tommy a drink even if he knew the kid was 18

Just enhances how young Tommy is

And how wilbur’s not that young anymore

How he’s still running out of time

Which Tommy will never quite understand

And Wilbur always goes “that’s because you’re so young Tom, you’ll understand soon I swear you will”

And Tommy goes “okay grandpa, okay”

Then Tubbo and Ranboo are Tommy’s “friends his age”, they're his coworkers at like macys, they make Tommy get out of his head and push Tubbo ina. Shopping cart,

“why?” He asks

“because Ranboo says it’s “unsafe” and “irresponsible””

“It is.”

“Shut up Boob boy, we’re doing this.”

I could imagine Tommy writing one of his first major pieces about the teenage experience

With moments between BT

After everyday he just writes and writes and writes

And somehow Tubbo and Ranboo make it into the page

Tommy does writing work shops and he wins awards ocassionally

The short story about childish experiences he didn’t get and gets now, missing things he never had

It’s one of his best pieces yet

It also helps that the contest it won’t had a cash prize

Paid rent for a few weeks yknow

He gets so happy about it

Buys drinks for him and Wilbur

Gives Wil the money

Bc he’s still underaged

He also goes and buys Ranboo a journal, the boys a writer Tommy can tell, and every writer deserves a good journal

Tubbo gets candy or some shit

Tubbo gets trinkets

Tommy goes to these workshops and is like

The youngest one there

That contest is what field Tommy’s fire for a bit

and Technoblade is a regular in the diner that Wilbur and Phil work at -

#yes this is inspired by tick tick boom thank you #tommyinnit #wilbur soot #technoblade #philza #sleepy bois inc

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tuiyla · 2 years

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hey, it’s the kitty anon from last night, just replying to ur post because ur brain is HUGE and im so pumped to talk to somebody about this and we are literally engaged now

“Quinn indulges in the illusion and Santana’s appalled by the reality.” YES!!!!! you found the words!!!!! this isnt just a summary of their reaction to kitty either, like, this sentence gets at the root of their conflicts as characters in such a succinct way. santana’s arc is about her confronting a reality that she can’t stand to face, quinn’s arc is about her desperately clinging to the facade of the “perfect, all-american golden girl” for as long as she can (and it failing time and time again) and just!!!! ugh that was such a great way to describe it.

the thing that bugs me is that we get a lot of conflict in quinn’s arc (which can be great, don’t get me wrong), but we never really see any resolution imo, or at least not any that’s well-written. if we had gotten to see more of quinn mentoring kitty we might have actually gotten to see quinn arc reach a proper conclusion. maybe mentoring somebody and being a guide for a “younger her” would have helped her see that she was still worthy of love and care and patience even though she wasn’t a perfect person (and it could have been a breaking-the-cycle sort of thing, because she desperately needed somebody to help guide her in high school and never got it). there’s also just something very sweet to me about quinn, who literally went crazy about not getting to have beth in her life, fulfill that maternal role in a way (finally, some found fuckin family 😩👌). plus like, watching them go from a mini-me and a kid in denial to two people who accept one another (and themselves!!!) in all of their flaws would have been thematically perfect for what glee wanted to be. her relationship with kitty could have become something so meaningful but they just dropped the ball and it genuinely frustrates me so bad 😭 #justiceforquinnscharacterarc

sorry this is a mess i hope this gets across what im trying to say!!! i have more thoughts about what kitty and santana could’ve been doing character-wise during a mentoring plot line but i don’t wanna clog ur inbox. but thank u for replying to my first message, u made my day!!

Kitty anon, my beloved! I’m always down to talk more about any of my bitchy cheerleaders and your brain is huge so please continue sharing your thoughts. I’m not gonna talk about Santana much here but that’s only because I’m looking forward to your thoughts on her and Kitty’s relationship! So if you feel like it please do share. I also have kinda separate thoughts on Quinntana contrasts/similarities and further thoughts on how Kitty mirrors both of them (the topic that started this!) but I’ll do those in another post. Feel free to reflect on that when it happens!

I completely agree, Quinn has all these huge story beats and really high stakes plots and then... nothing. I think I’m more critical of even the season 1 pregnancy storyline than most because I hate how much it focuses on Finn and even Will and Puck instead of her. Like, so much happens to this girl within such a short time and it’s like the writers just play groundhog day with her, resetting the status quo each time and giving her a different route to realize what she really wants.

I’m loving your ideas on her mentoring Kitty, it’s a shame Quinn was reduced to a guest star in later seasons otherwise this could have worked so well. (On the other hand good for Dianna for getting out.) At the very least I think we really needed a scene where Quinn realizes that Santana was right and Kitty really was up to no good, you know just to have that “oh shit” moment. Especially because I really do believe, as malicious as she was, Kitty didn’t fully realize how messed up everything she doing was. You can see it on her when Santana calls her out after Marley faints and then in deleted Swan Song scene she even tells Marley “you weren’t supposed to get hurt”. Not that that negates what she’s done but so many see her as this purely evil character instead of the ignorant kid she was.

And I think Quinn would be a great person to extend some understanding, like you say. And Anon, that “she was still worthy of love and care and patience even though she wasn’t a perfect person” bit? Omg you read my mind. I’d love that for their dynamic because, again in the deleted scene, when Marley shows Kitty understanding instead of contempt she’s so confused. And in Previously Unaired Christmas as well, Kitty shows she’s aware that she’s messed up and doesn’t view herself as worthy. So for Quinn, a person who’s made mistakes and hated herself for it and who didn’t often get help and compassion when she would have needed it the most, to be able provide that for Kitty would be *chef’s kiss*.

And this?

there’s also just something very sweet to me about quinn, who literally went crazy about not getting to have beth in her life, fulfill that maternal role in a way (finally, some found fuckin family 😩👌)

Holy shit where has your galaxy brain been all my life? Alright, jesus, just give me a second.

I would have never thought of that but it is such an incredible thought. Yes. Yes! Quinn getting to guide this messy kid who’s so much like her in many ways? Who aspires to be like her, not realizing that the Quinn she idolizes crumbled under all the expectations she was supposed to live up to? Quinn getting to be maternal in a healthy way? Holy shit.

Anon your thoughts definitely came across and don’t even apologize, it wasn’t messy and if it was my repsonse isn’t any less messy lol.

(I’ll share one more thought but only with you, okay? So everyone who’s engaged to me should come to the auditorium. Okay. You know that Quinn quote in the s3 finale?

This freshman just gave me a hug and told me to 'never change.' Poor thing is too young to realize that change can be so good.

I headcanon the freshman was Kitty and no one convince me otherwise. The timeline checks out and I mean who’d care anyway this is Glee. I was planning a gifset for this but it’s been years since my gif game was anywhere near on point so, we’ll see. But I find it so interesting that this whole idea of embracing change applies to Kitty’s arc as well.)

#quinn fabray #kitty wilde #glee #glee asks #anon #Anonymous #ask #kitty anon #look i have a tag for you!#my thoughts #i have more thoughts but it all feels so incoherent lol #kitty asks

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dyketubbo · 3 years

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can confirm that cclingyduo are SOOO much more compelling because they actually have STORIES abt them. like when people hear “conflict” they automatically assume “fight” and while yes, clingyduo did fight, conflict isn’t always fighting— conflict is NECESSARY to any good story. that’s literally english lit 101.

aeduo are a comfort duo. they’re sweet and cute and they’re best friends and they always support each other. but conflict? there is none. they face conflicts together sometimes, but usually the conflict they’re involved with has nothing to do with their relationship, which makes the relationship itself not very interesting. GOOD? yes. COMFORTING AND CUTE? yes. INTERESTING AND DYNAMIC? ehh…

i mean, it CAN be! anything CAN be interesting if you read into it enough! but you have to read into it.

clingyduo meanwhile— literally the entire focus of all of season two was THEIR relationship, was the conflict THEY were going through.

putting pressure on your characters is what makes them develop. putting pressure on RELATIONSHIPS is what makes THEM develop.

clingyduo had entire arcs about the fundamental differences between them (heart vs mind) that could make them fall out— but they overcame it, their relationship DEVELOPED, and they are stronger friends because of it. their relationship is not static (like some peoples). and that makes their bond better, in my opinion.

anyway adding conflict and any sort of pressure actually makes things better [insert metaphor about diamonds here]

and this is why i was VERY excited about the possible c!beeduo burger conflict. putting pressure on their relationship could only mean good things for their future development imo.

anyway yeah c!clingyduo supremacy for ever and ever sorry not sorry

- max

YES LITERALLYYYY LIKE. CONFLICT MAKES STORIES INTERESTING!! c!clingyduo actively grow from how they interact with each other, their differing mindsets makes the other think about what theyre doing and saying and thats good!!

what it is i think is that if c!aeduo did face any conflict, its in the past, and its not hinted at in the text anyways. when we get c!aeduo, its like.. somehow they managed to reach a peak in their friendship, but their characters are static enough that it means as a result the friendship is also static.

meanwhile this isnt present with c!clingyduo, and id dare say that even c!beeduo have had enough growth as a relationship that theyre also ultimately more appealing to me (and again, both show a sign of trust in those you care about, while at the same time, we see in how they all act around others such as c!wilbur, the reason they trust each other is because they believe in each others growth and care so strongly they can trust each other even after getting hurt)

and yeah so true about the burger conflict.. genuinely i hope that they manage to pick that up because while theyve obviously grown in their own ways, they both need some sort of conflict that actually matters to them to get them and their relationship to truly grow. and i feel like the fact that theyve already had conflict means we know that theyll likely still care about each other and actually have a nice resolution and i feel like that certainty is satisfying while i.. truly just dont know how c!aeduo can grow outside of just "can yall please feel some regret for the shit youve done and start listening to others . please" and at this point that kind of just makes me tired to wait for idbwjxb

#angel answers #c!aeduo are lovely and all but theyre definitely much more on the like. comfort side than dynamic side like you said #amaryllis analyzes

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jincherie · 4 years

Text

mystery gang; unsolved |PT.2

☾ — pairing: taehyung x reader ☾ — genre: demon au, supernatural/paranormal au, buzzfeed unsolved au/inspired, smut (oncoming), f2l ☾ — words: 6.2k ☾ — rating: adult! this one is sfw, but final part will be nsfw ☾ — warnings: demons and haunted houses, supernatural & paranormal themes! this is the part where shit goes down, so be aware of that! also some angst ☾ — notes: part 2 of 3! the next part will be the resolution and the smut, so look forward to that!! also wow man first post of 2020!!!

ever since you met taehyung in one of your first year classes at university, you seemed to click and you hadn’t parted from each other’s side since. you’ve been his friend for a few years now, and your mutual interest in the supernatural and taehyung’s propensity for finding the spotlight wherever he goes led to the two of you starting up your very own supernatural investigation vlog series. friends isnt the only thing you want to be, and one night close to hallow’s eve when the two of you get a little in over your heads in a way you never have been before, you find out that maybe it’s not only you that feels that way.

— posted; 05.01.2020 || ⇤prev. | masterlist | next⇥

PART TWO

You wish that you could say that as the night goes on, your nerves begin to ease. They don’t, though; the church, albeit slowly, proves to be feeding into all your fears. You feel paranoid, as you often do while filming this show, but tonight it feels like something… more. As though there’s a little bit more substance to your worries than usual. Needless to say, you’re not a fan.

It begins in the largest part of the church, as you’d expect. The hall where processions were held, lined with pews and intricate statues in its better days, is far too big to be giving you any comfort. There is so much space, so much empty blackness, that it actually feels like it’s closing in on you a bit. Surprisingly, in between segments you record for the vlog, Taehyung ends up distracting you by bringing up all the other times you went to places allegedly home to ‘demonic’ energies. A part of you thinks he’s doing it because he knows you’re uneasy, but the rest of you is more annoyed that he’s making fun of you again. He knows you’re wary of demons!

“You know, I think you’re taking this much better than that last house we did—you know the one a state over?” Taehyung remarks, setting up a little camera so that it can record the two of you whipping out the spirit box.

“Please don’t remind me,” you say, placing a hand over your stomach to quell the nausea rising at the mention of it. “It was popular with our viewers, but at what cost.”

“Yeah, they were surprisingly fond of you looking like you were about to vomit,” Taehyung says, somewhat nonchalant—when you direct a glare his way you can see the cheeky smile on his face, though. “Anyway, that one wasn’t as bad as this one is meant to be, and you’re already doing much better! Kudos.”

“Don’t patronise me,” you say, taking the spirit box from him and moving to one of the seats you’d set up. It feels wrong, in honesty, like sitting down in this seat is inviting a whole lot of misfortune to fall upon you. You don’t bother telling Taehyung that you’re actually doing far worse than last time. “I won’t apologise for having a healthy fear of the unknown.”

Snickering, Taehyung finishes setting up the camera and flicks it on. The lights you have illuminate only the barest patch where you’re sitting. You don’t like it, you don’t like it one bit and you hate that it feels like something is behind you, hands hovering just out of your sensory range. The muscles along your back are tense and rigid and you do your best not to show it to the camera.

“And here I present to the viewers, the crowd—and ghost—favourite, the spirit box!” Taehyung announces for the camera, voice a little louder than you’re comfortable with. You restrain the urge to shush him only because you know he’ll make fun of you for thinking that being loud will attract the ghosts. “We’ll be asking some questions in an open forum for any ghosts, ghouls and-or demons to respond—”

You smack him, delivering him with a warning glare, and he simply chortles as he sits down. You clearly mouth ‘I’ll kill you’ at him, before sitting back in your seat and clearing your throat. “Right, yeah. It’s spirit box time. I literally… can’t put into words how absolutely overjoyed I am.”

Taehyung laughs at how you blatantly forced those words through your teeth, but otherwise remains silent as you fiddle with the spirit box and do your usual introduction for the viewers and spirits around.

“Please, use this as a medium to communicate with us. We’ll ask some questions now.” You finish up the spiel, turning the box over and leaning forward to place it on the pew between the two of you. It’s as you near the pew that the hair along the back of your neck rises suddenly, prickling and making your muscles lock up for the barest second. A breeze brushes across the skin and skims your ear, and you swear you catch a word that rides with it, soft and thin yet clear as day.

“Don’t…”

You shriek as your reflexes kick back in, hand slapping to your neck and a glare already on your face to direct at Taehyung—surprisingly, he seems bewildered at the sudden heat in your gaze.

“That’s not funny!” you scolded him, attempting to pat down the hairs that rose on your neck. “I told you not to whisper in my ear like that when we’re in demon places!”

Taehyung’s hands fly up into a position of surrender. “It wasn’t me! I didn’t do anything! You can check the camera if you want!”

The panic that had already welled within you and was on track to fade reignited at that, fear stopping your thoughts from flowing as they should. There’s an unmistakeably scared edge that enters your voice, “What? But I just—someone—something just whispered ‘don’t’ in my ear, I swear.”

From Taehyung’s face, it’s clear he doesn’t believe you—or at the least, doesn’t believe that some otherworldly entity or otherwise whispered a whole word in your ear.

“No way,” he says, confirming your thoughts. There’s something that flicks across his face though, something out of place but too ephemeral for you to catch. “It was probably just a creak. This place is old, you know.”

“A creak that sounds like a whole word?” You push your case a little more, but you’re already shaking your head in defeat. You know there’s no way to sway his sceptic ass. You think a ghost could appear in front of Taehyung right now, slap him across his face and call his father a whore, and he’d still try and explain it away. “Whatever. The tape will show I’m right.”

Taehyung huffs, clearly entertained—you wish you could be as at ease as he always seems to be. He waves his hand to urge you on. “Hurry up and get the spirit box going so it can be over and done with. I hate listening to it.”

“Fine, but I’m doing it because I was already going to and not because you told me to,” you grumble, reaching for the spirit box and doing your best to force from your mind what happened the last time you were in a similar movement. You look up just in time before turning it on to catch Taehyung looking right at you, a brow raised and something heady in his gaze.

“You’re such a brat.”

You bite your tongue and resign to only sending him a glare, flicking on the spirit box and relishing in the way Taehyung flinches as the harsh sound of static replaces the heavy silence in the air. To be honest, you don’t really like the spirit box either, but it gets results. Well, you think it does. Taehyung would be all too happy to argue the differ.

“Alright,” you start, voice a little shakier than intended. You clear your throat and try to clear your nerves with it. “Let’s get it. First, is there anyone here with us now?”

The static is almost deafening, the volume turned up high enough that some of the audio-crunching is borderline painful in your ears. The device is as jarring as ever, the rate at which it flicks through channels almost distracting enough to lure your attention away from how tense and thick the air feels around you. There aren’t any prominent sounds or words that come through, and you give it a few more moments before probing some more.

“Uh, oh boy… Who… is in this room with us? Meena, are you in here?”

Taehyung snorts. “Or maybe the priest, or the groom that was meant to be married to Meena—anyone? Hello? Man, I don’t think we’re ever going to get something from this stupid box—”

It’s as Taehyung is in the middle of taking the piss that the static morphs ever so slightly, sounds forming the barest edges of words.

“he… here…” Static, louder and louder and then softer, making way for another hint of barely comprehensible sound, “…on’t g… in…”

It’s not loud enough to really count as anything, and not loud enough that Taehyung even notices it over the sound of his own talking, but you can’t help the sudden feeling that gauges a place inside you. You want to leave so badly—you don’t think you’ve wanted to leave a place this much since that first house.

You don’t even realise you’ve become all that distracted until Taehyung’s voice brings you back to the present moment. He’s leaning forward, waving a hand in front of your face; you keep your gaze on the parts of him illuminated before you and away from the pitch black beyond his form. “Yoohoo, you still there? The ghosts aren’t responding to me, it’s your turn to ask them things.”

You roll your eyes, avoiding his gaze for the slight searching edge it has adopted. “Not all that surprising. If I was a ghost I wouldn’t want to respond to you, either.”

Taehyung lets out an offended noise, and just like that the session resumes as it normally would. You can’t shake the odd tension in your muscles, but you can only hope that the hall held the title of creepiest part of the church and that the rest of the night would be smoother, less spooky sailing from hereon out.

X x x x

The rest of the night has not gone by with smoother sailing, you hoped. There are more rooms than anticipated in this building, and painstakingly exploring each and every one is beginning to really take its toll on you. The walls and floors creak, moving with you and even in your wake, like there is another pair of footsteps trailing behind you. The only sound to permeate the air is that of the wood and the odd cricket from outside—when there is complete silence, and even the crickets don’t sound, is when you’ve discovered you hate it most. Because it feels like everything suddenly stops, and everything is then waiting for something to happen. You’re definitely not a fan.

You try and upkeep your usual antics with Taehyung, but this place is really getting to you. On more than one occasion, you swear you can hear the barest of whispers, and feel fleeting, featherlight touches on the parts of your skin bare to the air. There seems to be a common theme in what you swear you can hear: ‘he’s here’, ‘leave.’ It’s not the most ideal thing you could be hearing.

Of course, Taehyung isn’t hearing or feeling a thing. You really hate that none of this ever seems to happen to him, that he’s so damn… immune. If you knew being a sceptic ass would protect you so much, you might have tried your hand at it, but then again you think you’d have a lot of trouble forgetting the things that have happened to you so far.

About midway through the building and a little over halfway through your tour, you enter one of the last few rooms (which you view as simultaneously a good thing and a bad thing, since the last room on your list is the most haunted in the building). Well, enter is a strong word. The second you stopped in front of it, an awful feeling like ice sliding down your spine came over you. The most you were able to make yourself do was stick your head in before Taehyung took the opportunity to waltz on inside, completely unbothered.

“I hate this,” you grumbled, to anyone that would listen at this point. It took you a few breaths before your legs felt strong enough to follow Taehyung into the room.

It’s tiny, admittedly. You have no idea what it would have been used for, before the church fell, and you can’t really tell since any and all furniture in here has since fallen prey to decay and rot. It’s just as you take a few steps in that Taehyung halts, turns around, and huffs.

“Nothing in here,” he remarks, turning on his heel and marching out. “Boring. Come on, let’s go to the main room—the big paranormal breadwinner of this place.”

You sputter incredulously, summoning your thoughts as you turn to follow him. He makes it out the doorway but before you can follow, only a few paces behind, the door that had been wide open for the two of you to enter slams closed with such a loud, shaking BANG you almost topple in fright.

It takes a second for what happened to sink in, another for you to realise you’re now in this room in the dark alone, and another for you to feel the hairs along your neck and back raise all at once. Completely surpassing ‘fight’, you launch at the door and bang on it.

“Taehyung!! This isn’t funny!” You’re scolding him, but you know you didn’t see him anywhere near the door. “Can you let me out? The handle isn’t working in here. Oh, what the fuck, what the fuck—”

With one palm pressed to the door, you try the handle over and over and over again. It’s like it’s locked, or stuck, as though it’s been rusted over in the same place for years and refuses to budge. Except, that makes no sense, because it was literally just open, you were just in here and there isn’t a lock on this door’s handle so it should be opening—

It’s just as panic is beginning to touch the bottom of your lungs, the organs dipping into ice, that you hear the clearest utterance you have all night. A feminine voice, carrying the sadness of all the oceans and the urgency of fishermen when thunder starts to echo across that churning horizon…

“He knows you’re here.”

“Taehyung!” It’s a humiliatingly desperate cry that escapes you without consent, something a distant part of you is already scoffing over. What is calling for him going to do? You’re still stuck in here with this god-awful feeling and now that voice—

Before you can wallow and spiral any longer, there is a splintering sound and you only have a moment to step back before the door is finally swinging open. You aren’t sure how he did it, but you’re presuming it was by force—the handle isn’t even on his side of the door anymore. Taehyung doesn’t even hesitate before grabbing you by the wrist and yanking you out, eyes wide. You have the very sudden, strong urge to just launch yourself at him and cling, but even in the beginnings of your hysteria you somehow manage to refrain. It doesn’t help that you know all it would take to feel secure in this situation is being encased in his arms.

And probably also getting back in the car and getting the hell away from here.

“What the fuck was that.” You hadn’t realised it earlier, but your breath is coming kind of fast. You feel a bit like a frightened animal. “What the fuck—”

“The breeze,” Taehyung says, the answer coming easily. When you look at him, though, he doesn’t seem entirely convinced as he usually is. You’re too shaken to even rub it in like you want to.

“Whatever,” you dismiss, antsier and more eager to get out of here than ever. “Let’s just skip the rest of the rooms and get this big one over and done with.”

Taehyung makes a soft, noncommittal noise that you take as agreement. When you go to move though, he stops you.

“Look, I know the original plan was to spend the night in that room tonight,” he begins, dark cocoa eyes gentle as they hold your gaze. “But you’re getting pretty shaken up—do you want to do some spirit box shit or something instead and just go back to the hotel after?”

Your chest warms at his concern, chasing away a few inches of fear that had embedded themselves over the duration of the night. A part of you is resistant though, the prideful part that wants to see your word through to the end. That resistant part of you isn’t as big as the rest that is thoroughly freaked out, and is therefore quickly outnumbered.

Since the words seem to have gotten stuck in your throat, you simply nod at him, hoping your eyes convey how thankful you are that it’s his suggestion so you didn’t have to ask yourself. You kind of wish he’d also suggested you scrap the part of the plan where the two of you go into the room one at a time and spend five minutes there alone, but you suppose you can’t have everything. You still needed to come out of this with enough good footage for an episode, after all, and there would have been no point coming here and getting borderline traumatised if not for that.

Taehyung offers you a slight smile, low baritone more comforting than he probably realises as he speaks just once more, “Alright, we’ll do that. Now take a few deep breaths, you’re acting like a cornered animal.”

You simply mustered a snort, not bothering to tell him that’s exactly how you feel. You almost spare a thought to wonder who could have been harassing you this whole time—Meena? Her Fiancé? A demon?—but you shut it down before you can work yourself up any more, and do as he instructs. A few deep breaths later and you feel much calmer, less fried. You’re in no way ready to go into that final room, but you’re the tiniest bit more ready to accept that it’s about to happen.

The final room that you had on your list to investigate was, as you now tell the camera and viewers, the most allegedly haunted of them all. It’s a hidden room, through a concealed doorway behind where the church organ used to be and up a cramped, spiral staircase. You don’t know what the original purpose of this room was, either, but you do know that it’s the final location in the number of tales about this place where the bad things happen.

“So, if we are to believe, let’s say, the version that says Meena summoned and made a deal with a demon,” Taehyung says as you climb the staircase, and puts weird emphasis on the word as he says it, likely in an attempt to make you chuckle. Oddly sweet of him. “Then this is the room where she did that? The demon room?”

You do your best to ignore the spike of fear that shoots through your chest. “Yeah,” you answer, voice cracking. You clear your throat. “That would be… this room.”

You’re audibly unenthused, but you’re sure the viewers will love it. They always seem to enjoy you losing your mind.

Taehyung is trailing behind you as you climb the stairs, the wood creaking dangerously under your weight with each step. The only reason you can even see which step to take next is because of the torch in your grasp, although it has grown shakier in the past few minutes than when you first started the night. Now that you think about it, why are you the first one going up these stairs?! That is so unfair!

Then again, if you were going second and something grabbed you from behind…. maybe that would be worse.

You don’t climb very far, and as you near what you presume is the landing that leads to the final room, you can’t help but notice how much heavier the air has gotten. You can feel it all against your skin, dragging along as you walk through it. There’s a feeling beginning to trickle and swirl in the pit of your abdomen, too. It’s nameless, but you know instinctively it is not the kind of concoction that heals and soothes.

“So here it is,” you announce as the two of you arrive on the landing, staring across the few metres between you and the doorway to that stupid room. “The room of the hour, where most alleged bad things in the tales about this place went down. Well, besides the chandelier thing. That was… yeah.”

Taehyung is already looking at you, camera pointed your way, and you can tell from the look in his eye that he knows you’re stalling.

“Right, so, we’re gonna do the usual—go in, spend a few minutes alone, see if we can get a response…” You trail off, gulping and feeling a little nauseous as you describe your nearing fate.

“You want me to go in first?” Taehyung asks, a teasing lilt to his voice. You shoot him a glare.

“And have you stir up any spirits and-or beings that are in there for me? No thanks.”

He laughs, but it’s much quieter than you expect. Almost sullen, you sigh and begin preparing to go in alone. You’re avoiding looking at the door, because you already feel the weird vibes seeping out and you don’t want to look in and risk actually seeing something.

Taehyung helps you with the equipment, handing you what you need. When you’re done and ready to go in, he takes a few steps closer with you—and then he freezes. You figure that’s just where he’s choosing to stay until you come back out, and continue into the room.

The second your foot crosses the threshold, the first thing that registers is how much cooler it suddenly is. The dimming torchlight reveals that the room isn’t that big at all, but in the absence of light it feels like the blanket of cold, lurking darkness stretches on endlessly. It almost feels like it has a certain sense of gravity, pulling you in, making you dig your heels in on instinct.

Oh, you don’t like this. Is it too late to bail?

“y/n…” Taehyung says your name softly, and you hear it, but dismiss it soon after when you realise he’s probably about to try and spook you. You force your feet to take another few steps in, when Taehyung’s voice sounds out once more.

“y/n, wait—”

There is a chord of something different in his voice, something you haven’t heard in him before, that makes you pause and turn around; even if it means turning your back to the rest of the room and the abyss it holds.

Facing him for a moment, you catch sight of an indiscernible expression possessing his features—his brows are furrowed, mouth parted as though he is about to speak once more. He seems to be about to do just that when he catches sight of something over your shoulder and his eyes shoot wide.

In that instant, you get the very sudden, very strong feeling that something awful is about to happen, and you want to run.

You don’t get an answer or even a clue as to what he’s looking at. Taehyung begins to move, but he isn’t fast enough to beat the door that flies closed, a sudden and loud SLAM announcing the new barrier between you. It hasn’t even registered yet but your heart instantly stills and drops as a sheet of icy air plummets over you. For a moment, it is still, and silent.

And then, the worst experience of your life begins.

Legs that had begun carrying you back on instinct, stumbling over nameless items you didn’t get a chance to see, lock and freeze at the stark and unmistakeable sensation of a hand gripping tight around your bicep. It tightens, and then you’re being dragged, pushed back with your feet scrambling across the floor, until your back meets icy wall with enough force to make you cry out in pain. Distantly, you swear there is banging on the door, but you can barely hear it over the sound of your own pulse drumming erratically in your ears.

Your breath comes in clouds, the flickering torchlight allowing you to glimpse it before the bulb bursts and you have only the moonlight filtering through a boarded window to aid you. You almost wish that you didn’t, though—

Because in the very next second, something begins to materialise in front of you, as though being formed from smoke and pools of shadow cast across the room. A long, lean body with inhuman proportions, one of the spindly limbs ending in a taloned hand responsible for the grip on your arm. A smell so foul it makes nausea roil in your abdomen crosses your nose, and the being finishes taking shape before you in the span of a saccade. Its skin is like shadow incarnate, dripping like tar into sticky pools on the floor and burning like ice where it makes contact with your own. Spikes and disfigured lumps litter its form, but you think that the most terrifying part must be its face.

For all you can see of it is a crown of curled, gnarled horns, gleaming white eyes and a mouth full of teeth half the size of one of your fingers.

Half a scream makes its way out of your mouth before the demon hisses, the sound immediately making you clam up. “Shut up.”

The fear that clenches around your heart in a vice grip is one you’ve never felt before, your knees feeling like jelly.

“It’s been so long since any human has dared come here,” the demon says, and it’s like he is grating along the nerves at the back of your neck with every word, plucking them one by one in a curdling tune. “You’ve been so fun to play with. Souls always taste better once they have been soaked in fear.”

Your eyes had been transfixed in terror on the way the demon’s teeth shifted with each word, drool slipping down some fangs and dropping by your feet. You don’t know if you would have snapped out of it were it not for the sudden increase in banging on the door, growing louder and louder with each second. You don’t know if it is the handle making that rattling noise or your teeth and you don’t have the mental capacity to dwell.

When his words sink in a split second after they enter the air, its as though you make a subconscious decision that differs from the rest you’ve made tonight. You’re cornered now, and you can’t run—your brain chooses fight so you may have a chance to flee.

“Get off me!” You lurch suddenly, legs lashing out and kicking even as you can barely control them. “GET OFF ME!”

Your boots meet his legs harshly, and it probably hurts you more than him, but when you suddenly recall the half-empty bottle of blessed water in your pocket and reach for it, throwing it across his face, its like you’ve poured a bucket of pure acid over his skin. Steam billows and smoke follows, and the demon lets out a scream so sharp you swear your eardrums burst, but in no way does the pain weaken his grip on you.

“YOU BITCH.” The demon howls, eyes clenched shut and free hand lashing blindly to claw at you. “I’LL RIP YOUR HEART OUT AND EAT IT BEFORE YOUR EYES, YOU—”

It’s like you’re suspended, floating in time as his claws swipe and almost miss you, but manage to slice lightly across your collarbone—it’s so close to your neck that you can’t help but scream, kicking harder. The demons eyes fly open and narrow on you, its hand raising again. Your eyes clench shut on instinct, not wanting to watch his claws sink as far into your skin as they were meant to the first time. It’s in the moment after that there is a familiar splintering sound, and the grip on your arm is wrought free.

With nothing substantial holding you up anymore, your knees collapse and you sink to the floor, eyes flying open upon impact that you know is painful but can’t quite feel. What you see is something you definitely aren’t ready for—it takes a moment for it to sink in.

Unlike the scene that your eyes had closed to, the demon is no longer the only other being in the room—there is something else, body shrouded in shadow yet cast in an odd glow that shifts and warps like oil beneath sunlight. At first, you think that it’s giant and hulking in mass, but you quickly realise that the shapes protruding from its back aren’t lumps or anything of the like, but large, leathery wings. They flick and twitch, before shooting out and spanning at an incredible length as the new creature shoots forward. The demon that was so close to you before is now on the other side of the room, slammed into the wall by a hand around its throat that glows with heat, a startling juxtaposition to the cold still sinking into your skin.

The demon isn’t about to go without a fight; it surges back, limbs lashing, but the new creature is too strong and pinned to the wall the pitiful being stays, screaming in rage. Curled horns stem from the newcomer’s head, catching moonlight on the ridges and gleaming as it turns its head and glances over its shoulder, at you. Instantly, your heart freezes once more, except this time in a different sort of terror.

Because you know the face looking at you right now— it’s Taehyung.

It’s not the same as the face that usually greets you—there are those inky horns curling from his head, his ashy hair is tinged red on the ends, and its longer than you remember. Beneath the eyes boring into you are black markings like upside down teardrops, and the irises themselves are different shades of violet and gold, split down the middle by a slitted pupil. There is a fang peaking out from the corner of his lips, and the tips of his ears have elongated and angled. The curves and lines of his face resemble the Taehyung you know, and this should give you some modicum of comfort, but as you continue to look at him it becomes more than apparent that this Taehyung…

This Taehyung isn’t the Taehyung you know.

There’s a certain amount of dissonance within you, warring reactions to the information currently overloading your brain, but above all else you find yourself almost hysterically, irrationally scared. You can’t move, can’t seem to breathe as the creature— Taehyung? — releases you from its gaze and turns back to the demon struggling in its grasp. Breath rushes back into your lungs and you have enough presence of mind to attempt to struggle back to your feet. It’s hard, though, with your gaze transfixed on the scene before you.

“I should have known there was something behind the stench of this place,” Taehyung’s voice as he speaks is a mere echo of what you’re used to, a guttural growl strung with rage that reverberates straight through your chest. With each word that leaves him, there is a glow that builds around his form, like St. Elmo’s fire. The demon quickly goes from enraged to terrified, and the observation has your own gut dropping. “But I didn’t think whatever it was would be stupid enough to try anything. You shouldn’t have come out tonight, you shouldn’t have laid your hands on her.”

The demons shrieking becomes diplophonic, tune changing from angry cries to desperate, pitiful pleas.

“I did not know it was you, lord! I did not know! I would not have touched the lord’s human if I had known!”

“Shut up!” Taehyung commands, wings flaring. The demon instantly obeys, but at the sight of Taehyung’s free hand rising with what you quickly realise is a dagger, coated in flames, it returns to begging and pleading with renewed vigour.

“No, lord, please! I did not know! Please do not slay me! I will leave, I will return to the underworld! I will never near your human again! Please, lord, do not—”

“You cut her,” Taehyung hisses, fury coating each syllable. “I cannot leave you alive.”

And then, faster than you can blink, the blade is embedded in the demon’s dripping abdomen, and it takes all of a split second for its to become engulfed in the same cerulean flames that coated it. Taehyung’s grip around its neck disappears and the demon crumples to the ground with a horrid, blood-curdling scream so piercing it makes your vision blur and head throb. Blearily, you watch as the demon twists and curls, warping across the ground before the flames flare and heat washes over your skin.

And then it is gone, the scream it left behind still echoing in the air until the only thing left ringing in your ears is your own hurried, frantic heartbeat.

The silence that follows is startling, the two of you seeming to be processing exactly what just happened. You’re going to need more than a moment to properly do so, but the adrenaline rush from this near-death experience seems to be propelling you back to clear thought sooner than anticipated. Without the demon here, it’s almost as though nothing happened and you were imagining the whole thing. But then, your gaze returns to Taehyung; the very same Taehyung that stands across the room and resembles the demon more in his inhuman features than he does your usual Taehyung.

There are still the slightest tendrils of fear clinging to your heart, and where you stand you can feel the weakness of your knees—when Taehyung turns around, against the protests of a distant part of you, you can feel those tendrils flare up and clench tightly.

There is still rage rolling off his form, and you can almost sense the heat of it from where you stand with the absence of the earlier chill in the room. His expression is furious as he turns to face you, taking a step forward. Unable to help it considering what you just went through, you flinch and press to the wall, the slightest sound escaping your mouth despite your best efforts to squash it.

Immediately, Taehyung freezes. Those mismatched eyes are boring into you again but this time they’re wide, concerned as he takes in your reaction and the condition you’re in, gaze zeroing in on your collarbones. In this moment, you’re scared of him, and you can see the second he realises it. Something indiscernible yet that ripples akin to sadness pools behind his iris’, and he braves another step closer, hand outstretched—a hand with talons just like the ones that had cut you before.

“Don’t!” You feel like it’s not even you talking right now, but you can’t stop the words from coming out. So much happened, too much happened, you can feel yourself beginning to freak out as your breath begins to come quicker and quicker. You haven’t had time to process this. For the third time tonight, you feel like a cornered animal. Except, you never would have thought that it would be at the hands of Taehyung.

“D-don’t come closer! Don’t—Just… don’t…”

Your gaze hasn’t left him and you can see, almost feel the way he recoils at each word; it’s like you’ve punched him in the gut. You can’t stop though, you’re so overwhelmed and you so suddenly and intensely want to leave—you need to leave. You don’t even realise you’re shaking until you take a step, entire form trembling. Taehyung doesn’t move, eyes following you, his brows furrowed and mouth parted as though he wishes to say something. He doesn’t, though. He watches you with a sense of resignation. The sight of him still in that form, standing so painfully and undeniably there, is what pushes you over the threshold.

All of a sudden it’s too much—too much, too much, too much— and you can’t hold it back anymore. Chin wobbling, you don’t even think about the equipment or anything you’ve dropped, you can’t bring yourself to think of Taehyung, you just go. In a blur, you’re out of the room, down the creaking, rotting stairs—you’re stumbling in the fear taking hold of you but there’s something else there, a bittersweet tinge of hurt, the tiniest hint of betrayal. You don’t have time to pick it apart.

Before you know it you’ve made it down the stairs, through the ruined hall and out of the church. The night is silent, not even a cricket daring to chirp in the wake of whatever just happened. It makes you feel alone, but not the kind that you’re trying to be so desperately right now. You can’t chase the feeling away, though, as you dash for the car and start it up.

As you floor it out of there and tear onto the main highway, breath still coming quick and uneven, you can’t chase the memory of Taehyung’s crestfallen gaze as it followed you out the door, either.

a/n: pls let me know what you think and if u liked it interact with a like or rb!! It helps me know how many people have read it and how many enjoy it & how well its received!!! thank u for reading!!!

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