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juicedaloe · 10 months

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Mithrun and brain damage

I'm not sure if anyone is interested in this, but I wanted to make a post talking about why I think that Mithrun has brain damage from a traumatic brain injury instead of him being a representation of other neurological disorders or mental illness. I'm not that involved in the dunmesh fandom so I don't know how common this headcanon is, though I've seen a few people mention it here and there.

This is just my own opinion so if you disagree then that's fine. Some of this is just speculation and I can't say what Kui's intentions were. This post isn't meant to be that serious. I just wanted to talk about it and hopefully inform about how brain damage can affect some people in a way that I hope is interesting and relevant.

This will be kind of long because I like to talk so it will be under the cut. Apologies for the length and how much I ramble. Feel free to give input especially if I got anything wrong or if this is too confusing.

Okay let's go

Traumatic brain injury (TBI) is incredibly complex. The long-term effects of a TBI include a wide array of symptoms. Each injury is different, and some people can completely recover rather quickly while others can become permanently disabled, even for seemingly "minor" injuries. What I'll cover here isn't a definitive representation of the experiences of all those who have long-term effects from TBI, nor do I speak for everyone with brain damage.

Here are some long term symptoms relevant to this post:

Alexithymia (inability to process and name emotions)

Inability to process and name physical perceptions

Mood swings and emotional regulation difficulties

Communication difficulties

Social impairment

Apathy about caring for oneself

Lack of motivation

Alexithymia and inability to process physical perceptions

This one is rather obvious. While Mithrun is shown to feel emotions and have physical sensations (for instance, describing his location when he gets lost in the dungeon as "a cold place"), he is also apathetic to how this affects him. This means that his physical and emotional perceptions are reduced in some way. He says that becoming lord of the dungeon will leave someone "empty", showing he is aware of his dulled emotional state.

A good example of this is can be seen here in a bonus comic where he doesn't give much of a reaction to burning his mouth on hot food.

(I love these two a lot, by the way. Pattadol is really under appreciated.)

He is also not able to recognize bodily signals, such as hunger or when he is tired. Despite collapsing from exhaustion and not eating for long periods of time, he still insists he is not tired or hungry.

Mood swings

Mood swings in combination with alexithymia can be an especially disorientating experience. Those who struggle to perceive their own emotions can still feel them even if they don't know how to recognize it.

Individuals with brain injuries often experience drastic mood swings, particularly anger. To those around them, they can appear to go from 0 to 100 in an instant.

This is more speculation/headcanon on my part, as the strongest emotion Mithrun has for most of his appearances is anger. However one could interpret this as being unrelated as he is seeking revenge for a traumatic experience.

Communication difficulties and social impairment

Not only can naming personal experiences be incredibly difficult with a brain injury, but other areas of communication are often affected as well.

Mithrun is not able to set boundaries for himself even if someone is doing something he would not actually want them to do, which can leave him in a vulnerable position.

People with brain injuries can sometimes have a paradoxical experience when it comes to communicating with others. They can go from being very quiet to speaking at length about one topic, seemingly without regard for the importance of each bit of information. (I see it like Newton's first law of motion. It is hard to start speaking and it can be just as hard to stop.)

I really like this aspect of Mithrun's characterization. Usually, he is very quiet because he has no reason to speak. However, once he starts talking he is shown to be overly specific and goes on for long periods of time. Kabru has to spend multiple days figuring out his story.

In a side comic, Kabru tells Mithrun he should condense some of the personal details that Kabru finds irrelevant to the topic of the dungeon.

Mithrun shares many details about himself because his desire not to do so is gone. This mirrors the experience of many people who have brain damage to overshare and not understand how their words will come across to others. Sometimes they say or do things that are insensitive or inappropriate for the situation.

Caring for oneself and motivation

In the dungeon, Mithrun becomes reliant on others for self care. He also seems especially incapable of motivating himself to take care of his body when he is particularly focused on his goals.

In these panels, thus far he had been fairly receptive of Kabru trying to take care of him. However, he could sense that the demon was close and was too focused on that to care to eat.

Refusal of care and treatment is often an effect of traumatic brain injury. This can be for seemingly no reason, even if the person knows that this will help them. Sometimes people will lie about receiving treatment or doing things to take care of themselves, either so they can avoid it or avoid having someone take care of them.

He knows that eating regularly and not pushing himself too much will help him - he's been told multiple times on-screen - but he still has to be continuously told by others to give him that motivation to take care of himself. He's very apathetic to his physical state, even if it seems his only desire is for revenge and he should be doing anything he can to achieve that.

Other things of note

I wasn't sure where to put this, but while Mithrun's sense of direction is speculated by Kabru to be left over from his time as lord of an ever-changing, confusing dungeon, having poor sense of direction in the way he does could also be indicative of brain injury as well.

While the dungeon is confusing and illogical, he is known to have a poor sense of direction and to get frequently lost by those around him, even trying to exit an entrance he just came through. He is shown to be very intelligent, but memory is greatly impacted by brain injuries which affects a person's sense of direction and location.

Something that really stands out to me about Mithrun is how much the things that help him are particularly helpful to those with brain damage. He is physically capable of performing tasks, but he needs an outside source to remind him and get him started. He relies entirely on routine, and when that regularity is taken away he shows extreme difficulty taking care of himself.

Sometimes, the care that some people need is simply someone else to encourage them or to tell them when to do things. The care that he needs is pretty consistent with a person with a brain injury who does not need a full time caretaker and would prefer to have some independence.

Also, healing magic is specified to not work with brain injury unless the person is killed and revived. Mithrun had not been revived after his injuries, so it is entirely possible for him to have sustained a TBI. I don't think this matters that much because one is still allowed to have headcanons even if there is a magical explanation or isn't really possible in canon, but I thought it was an interesting detail.

In conclusion

Because of all this I don't believe that his lack of self care is due solely to mental illness. While mental illnesses like depression or PTSD can cause a decline in self care, the reasons why the affected individual is avoidant of these tasks differs. These disorders can also cause cognitive difficulties and emotional regulation issues, but not to the same extent or in the same way that brain damage would. I think that he does have both depression and PTSD (both are common after a TBI) but those are not his only disabilities.

And on a personal note, I just think that having a character with brain damage is really cool. Most of the time I've seen it the characters are not given very much respect and they are treated as comic relief and a joke. Regardless of whether you agree with this post or not, it is still nice to see a character with a disability like this.

Thank you if you read all of this. I hope it was easy to understand and I did not ramble too much. I don't have anything else to say but I've been wanting to write this out for a while.

Okay bye

#Dungeon Meshi #Mithrun

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ariseur · 13 days

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I’m the sephiroth hc anon, yea I was referring to the sfw and nsfw, sorry for not specifying :0

sephiroth (n)sfw hc’s 𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪

sephiroth (ffvii) x reader

┊ ˚➶ notes ｡˚ 🎼

guys the motivation is coming back to me TRUST ME i’m slowly but surely working on it.. 🙏🙏

┊ ˚➶ warnings ｡˚ 🎼

post nibelheim sephiroth being jealous, possessive, a little toxic and manipulative, mentions of sephiroths touch repulsion and touch starvation, nsfw will have a warning before it, intended lowercase, lmk if i missed anything!! 💕

. ˚◞♡ ⃗ *ೃ༄ . ˚◞♡ ⃗ *ೃ༄ . ˚◞♡ ⃗ *ೃ༄ . ˚◞♡ ⃗ *ೃ༄

❥ soooo!!!1!1!1

❥ let me start off with pre-nibelheim headcanons because i miss a more domestic and ‘normal’ sephiroth rather than.. crazy seph lol

❥ so now let’s get into the actual thing!!

❥ i do not think that sephiroth is familiar with love whether it’s pre or post nibelheim, and if you read up on my angsty / comfort sephiroth fics you’ll see how i love the portrayal of where he’s so beloved by his fanclub and the public due to being a, “war hero” despite not feeling any close love like how you’d love him. the closest he’d get to developing emotional attachments would be his relationship with genesis and angeal (and maybe zack).

❥ it’ll take a while for sephiroth to fully trust and put his faith in you, but he’s actually very mature about romance. he doesn’t get very jealous and he’s very confident in your relationship and bond, if you read up on my jealousy hc’s i explain more there!!

❥ and when he really trusts you.. he’ll even let you perform his hair care routine on him when he’s too tired to do it himself. as you’ve seen, his hair is absolutely gorgeous and while he spends like an hour in the shower on just his hair— he spends more time when he’s out the shower as well with all the after product 😭.

❥ he enjoys having you brush his hair in the mornings and if you have long hair, he’ll return the favor. nothing’s better than sephiroth’s gentle hand cradling your head as he softly brushed through your strands, trying his hardest not to snag too hard on any tangles. if you’re comfortable with it, he’ll even hop in the shower with you and wash your hair for you. he’s not ashamed of nudity, he finds it a very normal and humanizing experience— knowing you can still be so vulnerable and not have it be sexual. he loves when you wash his hair for him too tho, it’s just super long so it’ll take a while lol.

❥ i cant see him as a morning person. i saw a post that he said, “sephiroths not a morning person, he’s a ‘im up because I have to be but if anyone talks to me, there will be murder’ person.” and i totally agree with that. you’ll wake him up, mentioning how he reminded you to wake up him bright and early tomorrow yet there you’d be, shaking his shoulder gently and he mutters a plea of five minutes more before pulling you closer.

❥ i definitely think that you guys would have to keep your love life private considering his job unless you’re like.. around angeal or maybe genesis. possibly zack, but you guys would have to make him promise that he wouldn’t tell anyone because he’d literally be so shocked. otherwise he’d go run to kunsel and brag about his knowledge or be so jaw dropped that he runs to angeal and is even more shocked when he already knows??? like, was he the only one who didn’t know about this whole thing??

❥ it’ll take a while for sephiroth to get comfortable with physical touch. although he secretly yearns for it, he’s also touch repulsed sometimes. it’s not that he’s appalled by you or your touch, it’s just that he’s gone so long without it that it’s foreign to him. once he gets used to it, he’ll eventually search for it and come looking for you in need of just some head massages or even just to rest his chin on your shoulder and view whatever you’re doing. he kinda does what cats do when they nuzzle the sides of their heads into your chest and like rub their noses into you.

❥ i’d like to think sephiroth’s very meticulous, so if you ever invite him in doing an activity such as baking or art or something, he WILL have to do it right or else he’ll get frustrated.

❥ as aforementioned, seph isn’t well versed in healthy love or adoration so if you even do a small task for him such as doing a chore he planned to do or cooking him pasta when he comes home— it will make him feel all gooey inside even if he won’t show it. he’s always calm and collected but, “even the coolest of people try their damndest to be alright,” as i mentioned in one of my headcanons for cloud lolol. he’s appreciative of even the small gestures, always making sure to thank you for your efforts as he knows they’re filled with love.

❥ for post nibelheim, though.. he’s lowkey manipulative. if you knew him before he found out about the jenova project, i’m assuming you’re only with him in hopes that he has some humanity within him that you can restore— well, that or you just like crazy men lol. he will definitely use that against you as a way of making you stay, always promising he’ll change after completing his plans with you by his side.

❥ if you met him post nibelheim though, he’ll be utterly fascinated with you as you’re basically his new toy. and he’ll follow you, regardless of when you met him. he’ll never let you leave his side after he’s gone crazy as he’s constantly reassuring you that his mothers legacy will be fulfilled, and that he can only do that when you’re beside him with support. it almost feels like it’s a shell of sephiroth. he never does any of the things he used to do before he was aware of who he really was, he’ll barely even let you touch him. he’s constantly on guard whenever you two are out, always keeping a hand around your waist or shoulder so that you don’t run off.

｡ﾟ•┈୨♡୧┈ ｡ﾟ

NSFW BELOW ꨄ︎

❥ id like to think of pre-nibelheim sephiroth as a soft dom. always being gentle, even when you’re sucking him off so nicely that he can’t help but grip your hair— he always makes sure not to pull it too hard and instead bites on his hand until there’s marks. he’ll always cater to you too, treating you like a pillow prince(ss) and is literally at your beck and call. he will not tolerate brattiness though and will definitely punish you if needed!! he’s just so kind, it’s only fair that he reciprocates the same words you give him :(((

❥ i don’t think sephiroths that experienced, but i don’t think he’s a virgin either. he doesn’t have the time to pursue intimate relationships, but he’s definitely experimented with one or two of his fangirls or something. he sort of regrets it now, considering it wasn’t all that intimate.

❥ like i said, it’ll take a while for sephiroth to even get used to physical contact let alone initiate it, but once you guys do finally have sex, he is literally the sweetest. he’s probably a little rusty lol but he’s a very quick learner!! guide him and teach him how to make you feel good, it makes his chest swell with pride once he gets you making those cute little sounds :(((

❥ let me tell you this man is huge though. he’s around nine to ten inches in length and he’s a big girthier than average. he has like two prominent veins, one on the underside of his shaft and one on the left side. when he cums, it’s a pretty pearly translucent color and right before he blows it beads at the tip as he tries to hold it in.

❥ sephiroth would like to think that there’s a possibility that you two could have kids, although his duties and reputation (and future events..) kind of prevent that. so i think there’s a breeding kink in there somewhere, but if you’re not okay with it then he’s totally fine!! it might sting a little if you don’t want kids, but in the end its your body, your choice— and he will respect that!!

❥ if you’re a virgin, he’d like to make your experience worth while and makes it very clear to you that he’s beyond honored to have been your first. he’ll even place you on the softest satin pillows while he gently thrusts into you, interlacing fingers and slowly pinning them against your head while he watches for your expressions. if you get shy or look away, he’ll always let go of one of your hands to redirect your chin back to him with a soft, “look at me, darling.”

❥ he relishes in the soft sounds of your giggles, watching as you look over the display he set up for you with roses and a meticulously made bed for you, a trick he had learned from genesis once when sephiroth had been too worried of not being able to satiate your need for intimacy. seph would lift you gently, giving you a small kiss and carefully maneuvering his way to the sheets before ceremoniously laying you down beneath him. he savors these lax moments during sex, not just the serious ones.

❥ post nibelheim is a little iffy, he’s definitely more possessive and aggressive when he’s having sex. he’s also very condescending with his words, i can sense a dumbification kink somewhere..

❥ as i’ve said before, post nibelheim seph won’t let you out of his sight most of the time. so he’s so possessive that if he sees you talking to someone else in public, once you find your way back to him, you’ll have wished you never greeted them. he’ll mercilessly press your face against the mattress or table or whatever you guys are on, and talks about how silly it was for you to talk to someone so casually when you clearly knew he was watching.

❥ i don’t think he’d let you top him that much, maybe once in a blue moon would he let you act like you have control over him— but the moment you get too cocky, he’ll remind you of who really has the most control once he grips your hip dips and flips you over, catlike, vindictive mako eyes glinting in the shadows of his body.

❥ again, i’m sorry but it’s the truth, also a little manipulative. post nibelheim sephiroth would accuse you of talking to other men or wanting them to satisfy you instead. he’d grit his teeth and roll his hips even harder— claiming he’d just have to show you how much he’s ruined you for other people. they are but boys but he, he is a man. and he’ll make sure you know that by the time the day ends and the sun seeps through curtains.

❥ pre sephiroth makes love, post sephiroth fucks. there’s a huge difference.

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moonkissedvisions · 2 months

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𝖄𝖔𝖚𝖗 𝕿𝖆𝖗𝖔𝖙 𝖇𝖎𝖗𝖙𝖍 𝖈𝖆𝖗𝖉𝖘 ☾

UNVEIL THE CORE ESSENCE OF YOUR BEING, PERSONALITY, AND PURPOSE WITH TAROT CARDS

Introduction:

We understand all Tarot cards as symbols. They essentially represent different aspects of our lives that reside in our souls and our subconscious minds. When we read Tarot cards, we are reading our energy, we are intuitively looking at our subconscious. We think of them as a mirror that reflects the multiple dimensions of our spirit to help us understand situations much better, and make our life more conscious and meaningful.

What are Tarot birth cards?

Tarot birth cards are symbols that shape our identity and lives from the moment we are born. They are our essence, an energy imprint, or even a map - like a birth chart but for Tarot cards- that can unlock a new understanding of ourselves, and all the potential of our life purpose.

Each of us has a pair of Major Arcana cards that represent our core self, so today I decided to explain all combinations. I explained the cards separately so you can combine them and see intuitively how they play out in your life.

Also, be noted that I only explain the "light" manifestation of each of them. So for example, if it says "selfless" the shadow aspect/backward expression of them is the opposite, "selfish". Or if it says "truth-seeker" its shadow would be "know-it-all". If you are curious about the shadow aspect of your birth cards or anything about them you can send me a question and I'll be happy to help.

Hey, don't forget to check out the awesome video link at the end of the post! It's worth watching if you want to dive deeper into the topic. Have a great time exploring!

Now let´s calculate yours!

and hope you enjoy it *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

How do I calculate mine?

The easiest way for me is to use the same method that we use to calculate our Life path number in numerology:

We add each digit of our birth date

m+m+d+d+y+y+y+y

Example: 11/22/1989

1+1+2+2+1+9+8+9= 33

2. We reduce it

3+3= 6

6 is The Lovers and The Devil (6 and 15).

As you can see, we got a pair of numbers that corresponds to a pair of Major Arcana cards.

important: IF YOU GET A 19, YOU HAVE TO REDUCE IT TWICE AND YOU´LL GET 3 MAJOR ARCANA: 19 (The Sun) -> 1+9=10 (The Wheel of Fortune) -> 1+0=1 (The Magician).

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

1 and 10: The Magician, The Wheel of Fortune

The Magician: This energy has the ability to manifest anything. Your essence is skilled, cunning, tricky, scheming. You posses autonomy and initiative. You are an independent thinker. You have a great potential, but you also put in the work and have a lot of fun in the process. You are diplomatic and you reject bias. Entrepreneur. Self-motivated. You are honest and direct.

The Wheel of Fortune: You are lucky or at least, you know how to feel lucky to attract blessings. You understand the cycles of life and therefore you have the ability to co-create with the Universe intelligently. You often get surprised by the events in your life. You know how to use opportunities in your favor. Manifesting is something that you probably did consciously since young.

19: The Sun (ALSO READ 1 AND 10)!

Adding to 1 and 10 cards, The Sun supplies your soul of creativity, popularity, happiness, honesty, harmony and serenity. You are a good friend. You are loyal and bring harmony, love and satisfaction to everyone´s lives. You are a leader, a celebrity, and people look up to you.

2 and 11: The High Priestess, Justice

The High Priestess: You are sensitive and wise. You are aware of the subtle, small details. You are able to find the point of unity, the basics of the Universe, and you understand how everything is connected. You are intuitive, compassionate, and loving. You excel at anything related to the occult, the mysteries of the Universe and human psyche, and anything related to relationships, unions, and secrets.

Justice: You are unbiased, rational, harmonious. You know what´s right and what´s wrong and trust in natural order and the balance of things. You value truth more than anyone else. You are good with law, philosophy, and karma.

2 and 20: The High Priestess, Judgment

Same qualities above for the High Priestess, combined with Judgment.

Judgment: The Judgment card adds in to the HP themes of awakening, spirituality, renovation. You may be someone who questions the status quo and the established norms and structures. You have the calling to awaken other people so you can rebuild and improve the system. You could connect to different dimensions and be a medium or have psychic abilities. You are otherworldly. You are also highly empathetic and sensitive.

3 and 12: The Empress, The Hanged Man

The Empress: You enjoy helping other people, creating, and giving birth to something. You embody kindness, intelligence, expressiveness, communication and abundance. You are dynamic and could be good at doing many things, you likely do all at the same time. You are good at communicating your ideas with others and you give others creative insights.

The Hanged Man: You are artistic, original, altruistic and idealistic. You see the world from a different perspective and you always contribute with clever ideas. You are witty and have the potential to become a genius. You are generous.

3 and 21: The Empress, The World

Here the qualities of the Empress are combined with those of The World card, so your creativity results in perfection, success, wholeness, finding your place in the world, feeling and being rewarded, self-realization. You are someone generous who help people with their creations and you make them realize their special place in the world as well. You are greatly admired. You are positive about people and life.

4 and 13 : The Emperor, Death

The Emperor: You are gifted with stability, strength, structure and practicality. You are powerful, hard-working and generous. You have integrity and good morals. You protect what needs protection and give structure and functionality to things. You are methodical and pragmatic.

Death: Death combined with the Emperor can reestructure and make radical changes to the world. You know when things need to die and be rebirthed in new forms. You can transform the world with authority, integrity and diligency.

In case you got 4 and 22, The 22 can be considered The Fool. You can either consider the Fool along with The Emperor and Death, or only read the explanation above and dismiss it. If you choose to consider the Fool, read below:

The Fool: I picture it as if you were the Emperor but with a good sense of humor, carefree, crazy, not making sense at times, chaotic, and extravagant. It makes me think of "dad jokes". You do not take anything too seriously. You restructured things spontaneously and the result may not make a lot of sense. Or it could be that you make more of a freedom-oriented restructure/change. You are an innocent and energetic leader. Maybe you don´t even understand why people may see you as a leader or follow you, because you don´t even take yourself seriously and are very disorganized, lol.

(edit): When I was writing about this combo, the new president of Argentina Javier Milei came to my mind. He talks about re-structuring the country, making economic transformations, solving the problems of the economy and poverty, and changing the country for the better. But he also has a silly personality, he's kinda funny and people make fun of him, they call him crazy, they even speculate about him having mental illnesses, and he doesn't make sense to A LOT of people. At that time I was lazy to search for his number but I just did and you know what? He is a 4 and a 22. 😳

5 and 14: The Hierophant, Temperance

The Hierophant: You are a teacher, someone wise who shares their knowledge and wisdom. You are patient, merciful, and modest. You guide others to goodness. You respect religion, tradition and family structures with open-mindedness and flexibility. You see everything as an experience and adventure and you like exploring different philosophies without getting attached.

Temperance: You can adapt to different people, ideas and environments, and you can bring different people together with peace, harmony and respect. You have the ability to solve conflicts. This combo makes a mentor, a guru, or a coach. You are balanced in logic and emotions and you are seen as mature.

6 and 15 (or 33): The Lovers, The Devil

The Lovers: Opposite forces, love, complements. You know how to love, not only other people but the whole Universe. You are a sensual person. You appreciate beauty, art and can excel at many different things. You are a gentle person who is good at making decisions that brings in the frequency of love to your environment. Everything you do is coded with love and passion.

The Devil: You are passionate, magnetic. You border limits. You are highly influential in whatever you do. You can control and manipulate others, which is not necessarily a bad thing, it´s just that you understand human psychology and can easily get the attention of others. With this combo you can captivate, tempt and induce lust and desire in others, so you may be working in art, music, writing, marketing, design, even animation and programming.

I also like to think of The Lovers as oxytocin and The Devil as adrenaline/dopamine. Dopamine and oxytocin together make love and bring new life into the world.

7 and 16: The Chariot, The Tower

The Chariot: You are someone intelligent, energetic, analytic, and introspective, who fights for radical changes and the evolution of society. You are a truth-seeker. You are fearless. You challenge the status quo and strive for spiritual and material progress. You are curious and love to learn new things that can change the world for the better.

The Tower: You mercilessly and strongly destruct what doesn´t serve the evolution of society and humanity. You break the equilibrum to build a better one. You are a rebel. You know that the truth always comes to light, and you also make it happen. You show the world what they couldn´t see and that's why you could be triggering. But it´s for the good. You challenge wrong convictions, judgments and beliefs, and you completely destruct them.

8 and 17: Strength, The Star

Strength: You are someone resilient. You know the importance of controlling your actions, impulses, thoughts, emotions and everything you do with mental strength and intelligence. You know that if you manage your own forces, you can achieve all of your goals and also help others do the same. You are very determined and optimistic. You like to work hard, not only for yourself but for others. You are an example of the word management and you like being in charge.

The Star: You give others hope and enlightment. You are inspiring. You can provide a lot of healing and regeneration. You are selfless and generous. You are strong in faith, and that way you can give others the reassurance that they need. You see the good in everything and that is what helps you get you good results and be succesful.

9 and 18: The Hermit, The Moon

The Hermit: You are interested in seeing what others can´t see. You look through things. You are deeply intuitive and contemplative. You search for answers in yourself by being in silence, in solitude, and looking inwards at your subconscious mind. You are wise, capable of offering advice and solving problems or mysteries. You are the healer who heals yourself first. You are personally uninterested in worldly matters and detached from the material.

The Moon: You can see through illusions and imagination because you connect to the dream realm. You are a good psychoanalyst. You are good with the occult. You are attracted to the unknown. You are a researcher, a detective, a healer of the most mysterious diseases. You are deeply spiritual and adventurous.

Carl Jung had this combo as his birth cards and I think this quote from him really represents it: Who looks outside dreams (The Moon), who looks inside awakes (The Hermit). The funny thing is, I didn´t know he had them when I read it and thought about the cards, but I was sure he had to be and I searched it, lol. I also have these as my cards so...

✯¸.•´*¨`*•✿ ✿•*`¨*`•.¸✯

I hope you enjoyed this post and that it was helpful! Thank you for your support and please, keep supporting me if you like this one 🌷

video about birth cards

PAC: Messages from the Divine Feminine

PAC: Healing Messages

PAC: Your beauty

PAC: Your natural gifts

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lowkeyrobin · 2 months

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hiii can i ask for hcs of quackity and his s/o being it couple? like other ccs are constantly bringing them up and hyping them bcs they're giving couple goals, or just fans getting them to trend on social media all the time idkk sorry if weird

oooo okay!! ; and dw this wasn't weird at all! it's fine lol ; thank you for requesting, hope you enjoy 🫶

QUACKITY ; it couple

summary ; you and quackity, through your shared fanbases and friends, have become the online it couple of the month

warnings ; language

word count ; 379

y/s/n = your ship name

masterlist

the hype and popularity spiked again once the qsmp had a random popularity spike after korea was introduced into the smp

then quackity started trending on tik tok and then you did once you posted a new video with him on your channel

getting the jake webber / tara yummy / johnnie guilbert treatment 💀💀 tik toks couple of the month

"Hey, Alex, I think we're trending again!"

"We are, cause you're so beautiful, Y/n/n."

"Shut your goofy ass up"

anyways, your friends loveeee sending you both edits and fanart

especially ones that make you look so hot together and shit

the tik tok edits go crazy

a solid hour of tubbos tubbathon is just reacting to y/s/n edits

they also love hyping you two up

from fit checks to cute couple moments, they're always hyping you up 💯💯

"ayeeee go! go! shake that ass! QUACKITY SHAKE THAT ASS" ; from roier and foolish

niki, foolish and tommy are probably your biggest hype men, in comments or on stream LMAO

god forbid one of you mentions having a favorite song or shared song you like /pos

the edits AGAIN lmao

you dressed as aesthetics of music you listened to for a video but never addressed it on stream so again, the edits LMAO

so many of you to emo/punk music and so many of him to rap/hip-hop (take this with a grain of salt ok...)

anyways, insta posts and stories together>>>

Twitter white boy of the month? more like Twitter it couple of the month. fuck them

dude streamer awards 😨😨😨 /pos

yall looked so good. head to toe, you fucking KILLED. IT.

the fanfic writers have been inspired. the people who paused their fics are all back solely for a streamer awards chap bc yall were being a little wink wonk the whole time /ns

you were just being adorable in general

nevermind the vids u posted of karaoke in the car afterwards

so many edits of you and alex making like thirst traps LMFAOOOO

anything for the fans 🙏🙏🙏

then you publicize a playlist titled "hot stuff w Alex 💯💯" and the world BREAKS.

don't care don't care

mostly like hot girl motivation + banger songs from the 2000s

like rihanna, jay-z, plus some newer kinda stuff like victoria monet and 21 savage LMAO

anyways that's all I got idk I'm sick and have 0 braincells

#lowkeyrobin #mcyt x reader #mcyt preferences #mcyt oneshot #mcyt x gn reader #quackity x reader #alex quackity x reader #quackity oneshot #quackityhq x reader #quackity #alex quackity

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raythekiller · 11 months

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Ticci Toby nsfw alphabet :0? please and thank you!

🗒 ❛ NSFW Alphabet ༉‧₊˚✧

Featuring: Ticci Toby

#Notes: ugh i love him sm

pronouns used: none, gn! reader

˗ˏˋ back to navigation ´ˎ˗

A - AFTERCARE

Super touchy feely and gentle. Will clean you up himself, you don't even have to ask. Cuddles afterwards are a must.

B - BODY PART

Another chest guy, boobs or not. His hands just gravitate towards it as you're having sex.

C - CUM

Likes coming on top of your stomach the most. Since you're normally barebacking and he doesn't want to risk anything, he pulls out last second.

D - DIRTY SECRET

Well, he thinks it's a secret, but everybody knows he's never even kissed anyone, let alone had sex before.

E - EXPERIENCE

As mentioned above, no sex experience, didn't even watch much porn like other guys his age, which is why he normally likes you taking the lead.

F - FAVORITE POSITION

Matting press. Doggy if he's the one getting fucked, he's too embarrassed to let you see his face.

G - GOOFY

He's more passionate than funny, since he takes it quite seriously. Will crack a few jokes after it's done, though.

H - HAIR

Actually pretty well groomed, likes to keep his junk clean. Too much hair and he feels gross. Not clean shaven, but fairly decent.

I - INTIMACY

Super romantic and passionate. The fact you want to do something so intimate with him makes his heart flutter, so he wants you to feel appreciated as well.

J - JACK OFF

Doesn't do it too often, never did even as a teenager. When he does, he doesn't even watch anything, just silence as he works his magic.

K - KINK

Here's a full post on his kinks.

L - LOCATION

Doesn't want to admit it, but in the middle of the woods. Loves the idea of fucking you against a tree and the risk of getting caught.

M - MOTIVATION

Mentioned this before, but dirty talking is a HUGE turn on for him. Just whisper something in his ear and he's yours.

N - NO

Similar to Ben, doesn't want to do anything to hurt or upset you, like impact play or degradation. Unlike Ben, he won't budge no matter how much you tell him it's okay.

O - ORAL

Giving, definitely. Even though he has no experience, he's a fast learner. Won't stop until you've come on his face.

P - PACE

He gets a bit desperate, so he might now be as slow and sensual as he wants to. The thrusts become messy and fast after a little while.

Q - QUICKIE

Prefers to take his time with you, so quickies aren't a very often occurrence. He wants to make sure you're completely satisfied.

R - RISK

Pretty open to experimenting. Other than that, the most risk he'll take is, again, public sex in the forest.

S - STAMINA

Oh, he'll go on for hours without breaks. It's insane the amount of energy he has. Though he comes pretty fast, he'll make up for it by coming multiple times in a row. As many as you want.

T - TOYS

Doesn't own or like them that much, honestly, but if you wanna try it he's all game. That being said, strap-ons are a completely different story for him.

U - UNFAIR

Can't tease or handle teasing. Doesn't mean he doesn't like it when you're a bit cheeky, though, but he gets worked up super fast.

V - VOLUME

Fairly loud, also a whimperer. Doesn't speak much during sex, just incoherent ramblings about how good you're making him feel. He gets fucked stupid really easily.

W - WILD CARD

Fucking loves it if you scratch his back while he's pounding into you. He can't feel it anyway, and it's a sign that he's doing a good job.

X - X-RAY

Pretty good size, about 8 inches, not too thick. Curves a little to the left.

Y - YEARNING

Not too horny, honestly. You're gonna have to initiate it most of the time if you wanna get laid with him. Not that he minds.

Z - ZZZ

Can't sleep for a good while after. He just holds you untill you go out and stares at your face lovingly, tucking any stray hair behind your ear.

#creepypasta #creepypasta headcanons #creepypasta x reader #ticci toby #ticci toby x reader #ray.writes #ticci toby smut

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dialovers-lover-xoxo · 6 months

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Warning: THIS POST CONTAINS EXPLICIT SEXUAL NSFW CONTENT! If you are under age or these types of posts make you uncomfortable, you may not want to read under the cut

I wasn't sure exactly how I was gonna do this. With the diaboys I did it x reader, but I thought for Yui it made more sense to relate it to her sexual interactions with whichever diaboy she's in a relationship with. If you like the x reader part what applies to the diaboys would apply to you as well :)

Yui's NSFW Alphabet

--------------------------

A = Aftercare

Yui doesn't really do anything "to" her partner because she's very submissive and a bottom, so there's no aftercare she needs to give them. She does however scratch at their backs and arms and even though her nails are short it creates indents, which she feels bad about.

B = Body Part (Their favorite of yours)

She loves being close to her partner's chest, feeling their skin, their heartbeat, running her finger around their nipple. She also gets very curious and almost borderline stares at her partner's dick and butt. She also likes their strong arms.

C = Cum

Yui enjoys when the diaboy pulls out and cums on her stomach (it makes her really embarrassed and flustered though) and she'll swallow but she doesn't want cum on her face. She *might* like the stickiness in her hair, or at least be fascinated by it.

D = Dirty Secrets

Yui has a really hard time communicating what she wants, she doesn't even know what she wants, she just knows she wants passion and intensity

E = Experience

Yui had no experience prior. It's canon. And she hasn't had experience with non-sexual romance/intimacy either. In Ayato's very first route she confirms that before going to the mansion she's never kissed anyone.

F = Favorite Position

Missionary. She can't take charge in the bedroom to save her life so a position where the man essentially does all the work is best lol. Plus she loves how they can kiss and touch and she can be held in his arms.

G = Goofy (Are they goofy or serious during sex)

Yui gets very flustered and shy easily and the diaboy finds it hilarious but Idk about goofy

H = Hair (How well-trimmed are they? How do they prefer it on you?)

A perfectly trimmed small triangle. She doesn't expect 0 hair but she doesn't want it super hairy, in fact hair kinda grosses her out. She won't say that tho.

I = Intimacy (Are they intimate during sex?)

Yes, but she mostly lets the diaboy take the lead so her intimacy is more subtle, like running her hands appreciatively over his body and being verbal like telling him she loves him

J = Jerking Off (Masturbation headcanons)

Yui actually has tried touching herself prior to any diaboy, and she was able to *ahem* enjoy herself doing so, but she was never able to reach climax. She still has a little trouble making herself climax but when she's horny and doesn't have her partner, she'll rub her clit.

K = Kinks

Yui enjoys being blindfolded and handcuffed or pinned down. She finds trust to be the most important aspect of love, so she trusts in the diaboy to be good to her during sex, and she finds it kinda hot being at his mercy. She also likes edging and being teased.

L = Location (Their favorite place to have sex)

A bed, maybe a couch

M = Motivation (Turn ons)

She gets aroused easily when kissing on a bed or any other surface that two people could have sex on.

N = No (Something they won’t do)

She tried anal and absolutely hated it. Even without pain she just hates the feel of anal.

O = Oral (Preference of giving or receiving? How do they do it to you? How do they like it done to them?)

She enjoys giving her diaboy oral, she likes making him feel good, hearing his noise, seeing his face. It makes her happy to know she can give him pleasure. She absolutely loves receiving oral and her clitoris is extremely sensitive so oral is great for pleasuring her.

P = Pace

She likes it slow-medium and occasionally likes it incredibly fast

Q = Quickie (Do they like them? Are they willing to risk it?)

R = Risks

In the games she's done passionate kissing like right in front of others, so I can see her being frisky in public but she'd be really embarrassed and go to a secluded spot and like hide behind something.

S = Stamina (How long can they go? How many rounds?)

She's pretty tired after just one round and wants to cuddle and sleep (especially if the sex is on the rougher/kinkier/faster side) but if she's feeling needy she might be up for round 2 after a short break

T = Toys

She's very sensitive to clit stimulation, so the diaboy loves teasing her with a vibrator

V = Vocal

Not loud, but moaning and whimpers. Especially when she's needy and being teased.

W = Wild Card (Random sex head canon)

She's a fairly quick learner

X = X-Ray

Small breasts, but curvy hips (as seen in the anime when she wears Cordelia's dress) her collarbones are prominent but not unhealthily so, lean long legs, her breasts are very perky and her nipples are pink and small. When she's on her back her hair fans out around her head and all the diaboys love it

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive)

Surprisingly high. She loves giving and receiving pleasure and making love

Z = Zzz (How soon do they fall asleep after?)

Very soon after. She'll cuddle up and fall asleep.

--------------------------------------------

Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed!

Masterlist to every character's nsfw alphabet! 👇🏻

#yui komori #komori yui #diabolik lovers yui #nsft alphabet #diabolik lovers #diabolik lovers fandom #diabolik lovers headcanons

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eyesore-boi · 7 months

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"WISH I COULD SAY SOMEONE'S/NO ONE'S THERE!"

Yeah yeah yeah "FNAF MOVIE COMING OUT OCTOBER 27TH!!" Yeah that may be happening for you, but for me...the original t r u e FNaF movie already came out in 2 0 1 6

Just joking of course i aM MORE THAN FUCKING EXCITED FOR FNAF MOVIE DJAKSBS WE HAVE BEEN WAITING Y E A R S - So I figured to celebrate such an accomplishment i have decided to...not actually draw anything from the movie yet but instead the "movie" we all had as a substitute: FNaF the Musical!

I still absolutely adore this thing, rewatching it while drawing this piece just blasted me in the face with nostalgia the whole way through, and was just a real fun time seeing these YouTubers all collectivly go crazy in their own ways all just for some p u p p e t s -

And also aaaah back then when making FNaF kid friendly wasn't the norm......cough cough security breach >:[

But for real, this was a real fun one to do! Been experimenting with lighting and shading A LOT recently which i think is good, fun to try the simpler designs of the "animatronics" (tho Mat honestly was fun i still remember that shitty bear costume front to b a c k -), haven't drawn Nate before, and Mark...god REALLY trippy drawing him with red hair again hhHnnDHSKSN-

But yeah, all and all, finally posting more of art, real hyped for the movie (planning to watch it on Halloween with some friends...while in my Warfstache cosplays hohoho-), and who knows! Maybe the movie will spark my motivation with...other things...

So with that cryptic ending i abruptly leave...just like how FNaF does hAHAHA G O D THE LORE IS IN S H A M B L E S -

#drawing this didn't just send me down nostalgia road #it fucking dragged me on the tail end of it's car down the road #cause when i tell you i watched the musical all the time as a kid #i watched it a l l the time #also while rewatchingit i decided to watch the other FNaF musicals they did on the later games #and that's how i found out that FNaF the Musical has it's very own lore separate from the games #...#oh #jooooyyyyyy-#markiplier #natewantstobattle #matpat #game theory #random encounters #fnaf the musical #fnaf #five nights at freddys #eyesore's art

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daniswoso · 2 months

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why aren’t you posting anything? we’ve been expecting pt2 to a ton of shit for weeks now and ur js not delivering mate it’s disrespectful to ur followers.

this ask is disrespectful.

i am in the hospital. i’ve just had open heart surgery i cannot magically heal and begin to write again while on top of that having 0 motivation. i, as a writer, (who by the way does it for myself and for free and as a form of entertainment) owe you nothing. please stop sending in requests like this because this is about the millionth one you’ve requested mate.

#woso #football #futbol #woso fanfics #woso imagine #footy #woso x reader #futból #writers owe you nothing #stop rushing me #i’m sick #i cannot magically get better

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gorgeouslypink · 2 years

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A lot of you are sabatoging yourselves in your void journey and it's time to take responsibility. I'm going to break it down into different ways you're sabatoging yourself and what you need to do to stop but the first step is to accept that. The truth is if you haven't entered the void, you sabatoged yourself into not entering it. It is your fault. You're sabatoging yourself.

Using void methods that are incompatible with you.

I had someone send me an ask about how they were using a subliminal to wake up in the void but they didn't really believe in subliminals. Sighs. Guys, if you don't even believe in subliminals, why are you sabatoging yourself by using a subliminal to enter the void? Obviously, it's not going to work.

Both the methods I shared in my post require a lot of patience and persistence. It's not going to be ideal/compatible for everyone. If you're sending me asks about how you fall asleep while trying my methods or your house is too loud for you to meditate, did it ever occur to you that maybe my methods just aren't compatible with you and you should try a different method? If you're using a method that is clearly not compatible with you, you're just sabatoging yourself and that's the truth.

There are so many methods to enter the void. Take some time to really think about yourself. These are the two main concerns: compatibility and belief. The only person who knows you the best is you. Which methods are acctually compatible with you? Do you believe that method acctually works?

Also guys, there are methods in theory that might work but aren't compatible with you in reality. I have been meditating since forever so I naturally chose methods that utilized meditating. In theory, meditating with alpha waves works for me but I never did enter with that, despite getting close. The thing that worked was using another method that utilized meditating. Why I'm mentioning this is if something hasn't been working for you, even if logically it makes sense that it should work, it might not be compatible for you and you might want to switch it up. But obviously I don't know the situation and this is something you have to decide on your own.

0% effort

The number of asks I get saying they believe in the void but just don't have the motivation to try and to give them motivation. If you're read my success story, you know I went through a period of time like this. It's time for the cold, hard truth. You're not lacking motivation, you're just a lazy bum.

You literally hold the method that can allow you to manifest instantly anything you desire. What do you mean "I need motivation"? If you really need motivation to get your desire, you don't really want it. Be real with yourself, stop wasting your time reading about the void, and get a new hobby.

But for real, how do you not see you're sabatoging yourself? Instead of asking blogs for motivation (which is never going to help because the 100+ other motivational posts on tumblr didn't work for you so why would this particular one) do this instead.

Think about how long you've known about the void. And how many times have you attempted? And what have you been doing in the meantime? Are you proud of yourself? Think about the desires that would have already came into fruition if you weren't so lazy. Think about the state of your desires because you decided to be lazy. For example, if you're manifesting your desired face, go stare in the mirror. That face you're seeing could have been your desired but it's not. And you know whose fault that is? It's yours. Do this with every single desire. Tell yourself the truth. You're sabatoging yourself and you have no one else to blame except for you.

50% effort.

This is for the type of asks that tell me "I affirmed for 20 minutes and felt symptoms but didn't get in. What am I doing wrong? " Love, you felt symptoms and stopped. You stopped halfway. This is like getting a double sided test, finishing the front and stopping, and then wondering why you failed the test. How do you not see the reason you didn't get in is because you sabatoged yourself by stopping halfway?

This doesn't just apply to meditating methods by the way. Any method. If you're only seeing it half way through, you're not going to enter. Stop sabatoging yourself and see the method through fully.

Letting failure define you.

If you let failure define you, you're going to be a failure forever. I get it. It sucks. You affirmed that the void was easy for a month, you did the 10k challenge, etc but you failed to enter and you feel like trash. But you can't let that define you. You need to move on.

Revise it. If you don't want to revise, assess what went wrong and what you can do next. Stop letting failure define you because you're just sabatoging yourself if you do so. Think about why you failed and how to stop failing. Don't scroll on tumblr waiting for a magical post to tell you. Sit down and think about it on your own. You either use your failed void attempt to help you enter the void or you stay a failure. Your choice.

Expecting your void experience to take exactly as long as someone else's.

Just because someone entered the void in 15 minutes doesn't mean you're going to too. You might enter it even less or it might take you 2 hours. But some of you refuse to accept that, affirm for the void for 15 minutes, give up, and complain.

I genuinely wish I hadn't written how long it took me to enter the void because of these type of people. There's a reason the youtube channel that released the video I used ended up releasing a 3 hour long version. Some people take even longer than an hour to enter sleep paralysis. It's different for every person. Stop sabatoging yourself by thinking it'll take you the same time someone else did!

Closing thoughts

Sorry this is so long 😭 and double sorry if you read this and this didn't even apply to you 😅. I know some of you are genuinely progressing along your void journey and this was not meant for you. However, if this does apply to you, please don't just like this and then continue sabatoging yourself. Take some time to really think about yourself and your void journey. The only person who's sabatoging you is you and the only person who can help you is you. I believe in you ❤

#void state

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cyrusthemagician · 1 month

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mermaid pomniiii

Guyss guys im working on my au come back i swear im just being slow

Real talk under the cut

Sorry i been so insanley dead as of posting consistsntly, considering i used to do one post a day and i realized ive lost that streak. this has been because im dealing w alot in my personal life, i wont go into details but it sucks so bbad and ive have 0 motivation left for.. Like anything.. Ill try to get back to it yall i swear dont leave just yet

#tadc waterpark au #waterpark au #tadc #the amazing digital circus #Tadc pomni #the amazing digital circus pomni #Tadc au

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ambrosiagourmet · 3 months

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Gimme a Kabru for the ask meme

Ahhhh hi I'm still doing this I will finish them let's go

Kabru!!

First impression

Once again gonna go for a pre-reading impression, bc honestly I really think the fandom osmosis impression I got was so off imho. So, Kabru first impression:

what if there was a hater. in the dungeon. :0

Impression now

I LOVE HIM... He's constantly agonizing over everything he does and the impact it could have and the big picture and its gonna burn him out completely someday if he doesn't slow down and realize he's allowed to live for himself sometimes. In a story chock full of survivor's guilt he is Mister Survivor's Guilt. He feels like he needs to do something to earn his existence, and that's such a heavy burden he has put on himself. Ough.

Favorite moment

There are a ton of little parts from the story that I love, but I actually want to highlight this bit from one of the Adventurer's Bible comics that lives with me:

I don't know, there's just something... something about it. Allowing Mithrun the privacy of his own story is such a strange kindness. Who else but Kabru could have thought to provide it?

Kabru, who wears Utaya across his shoulders everywhere he goes, but also never shares much about his mom, his food, the things he misses from Utaya. Or the superstitions about his eye color, and the ways that even the place he misses most wasn't always a kind home to him. Kabru, who has learned exactly how to cut up the piece of his own story in order to be able to hold the weight of them all and do the things he needs to do.

Kabru looks at Mithrun, someone who doesn't have the ability to care for himself, and provides this service to him. Offers him privacy. Privacy. The people around Mithrun have cared for him for years, but who has given him this?? Food, sleep, water, basic hygiene... but Mithrun deserves dignities beyond that too, even if he isn't able to ask for them.

And Kabru takes his eye for creating palatable stories, which he has often used to make himself fit in or force himself through unpleasant things, and uses it to help Mithrun in a way that no one else had.

Idea for a story

I don't have anything super specific here, just a GREAT DESIRE for post-canon Kabru stuff. I want to see him and Marcille become friends. I want to see him struggle to figure himself out now that his driving motive has been resolved. I want to see him forced to consider that he can't always do things for the Bigger Picture. I want to see how his relationships with his party members change. I want to see the adventures of the Laios - Marcille - Kabru trio. Pleaaaaaaase

Unpopular opinion

He's not just a hater in a dungeon.......

Like for sure his feelings about Laios are complicated and boy can they include Haterism, but also he is like the only person who vouches for Laios at certain points. Kabru intentionally chooses to have faith in him at several key moments, and the ending of the story hinges upon that faith.

I think he's got a very black and white way of looking at things sometimes, and he likes to be in control. This is where the haterism can come in.

BUT there's so much more than just that to him. Kabru is an extremely caring person in general. He notices details about people and often uses those observations to care for them - Mithrun in the example above, for instance, or the way that he thinks about how hard it would be for Rin to go back to the elves when considering whether to hand the dungeon over to them. He has a strong sense of justice. He is loyal to his promises.

I just wish those elements of his personality were given more significance in the fandom :/

Favorite relationship

Gotta go with him and Mithrun here. They bring out such interesting sides to each other. Some of my favorite moments are them surviving in the dungeon together, and of course that comic is one of my fave moments. The way Kabru understands him and continually chooses to use that understanding to provide kindness and support to Mithrun... it's good.

But also I think that Mithrun gets to a core part of Kabru that Kabru usually tries to keep hidden. Some part of the survivor's guilt, I think... the way Kabru is driven by a sense of obligation to a thing he Cannot Ever Bring Back.

They both pull something out of the other that no one else does, at least over the course of the story.

Favorite headcanon

Hmmmmm... does "he and Marcille will be besties someday" count? I think it counts. I love the idea of them being gossip-heads.

#ask #ask meme #I've got... two more of these left to do now. I will finish them. I WILL

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alligatorstomachacid · 10 months

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imagine miguel with a free use kink

Yes yes yes! He would let you do anything to him! (Within reason ofc)

He'd let you fuck him til he passes out and beyond that! He doesn't care, you want to mark him? Go ahead he's yours and yours only! Want to fuck his face, he's already on his knees! Degrade him or paise him! Or maybe both at the same time. Anytime anywhere! He's there for it.

(Also I'm almost at 100 posts! Just two more to go @-@. I'll be posting lots cuz I need a distraction and I have some motivation. Also where the hell did you all come from. The other day I was at 72 followers now I'm at like 86! Not complaining tho)

#gay #male reader #miguel o'hara #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o'hara x male reader #asks open

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kijosakka · 2 months

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Thoughts. okay so the total drama drama drama drama island special is interesting mainly bc of team e-scope but im going to take a moment here to ramble about his dynamic with other people here,,

(oh and i didn't have anywhere really to slot it into the other post or segue into it here but dodgebrawl as a Moment demonstrates how [this AU] noah can play the social game, just in a very very different way than how it's normally seen.

he knows what he's doing is going to bother his team and incentivize them to vote, i'd say in this au he even plays up the cockiness and makes veiled personal slights against specific people

(mainly those who would be annoyed enough to vote him off, see: heather, justin, leshawna, cody/trent to some extent if he said smth about gwen? < and gwen herself in that scenario. and to another extent beth, since hes playing up his outright mean traits, which would make lindsay vote with her. i dont think he would do anything specific to/with owen or izzy, since he may see izzy as too volatile and owen too genuine)

in the opposite way of whats expected, sure, but it is a social play. he can pick apart what these people are and what they show and push at it to achieve his own ends (and maybe its even some sort of way for him to regain control in this fundamentally uncontrollable situation he's found himself in; he can be the punishment in foucalt's imagining, to a much smaller degree))

so his teammates,,, do not like him tbh. his flagrant display during dodgeball and everyone being pissed at him after the fact is true in this AU, just coming with different motivations. even after the fact when the frustration of everyone fizzles out, hes still majorly offputting because of his detachedness, and deliberately makes his shown traits very unpalatable to experience in person combined with that.

the only two exceptions are izzy and owen respectively: owens mostly coming from a place of genuineness and im going to say while he wouldnt be able to verbalize it, in some manner owen would clock noahs behavior as a defense mechanism. maybe in the sense of 'hes just scared to open up to people!!' or something similar, but he definitely has a lot more faith that noah really isnt that cold and flat.

[*]izzy feels much the same -- except maybe it comes off more to her as strategic. izzy can act, and might recognize that in noah. if you wanted to you could write this in as to why she was eager to swap teams in the first episode, but it wouldnt change that he does get eliminated and thats all she sees of him until the special -- which, her intrigue in his lacking and the fact that it apparently wasnt strategic to get him further in the game, could help explain why she picks him in the team-up.

[*i have soooo much to say about izzy in this au actually. but ill save it for a diff post]

and speaking of the team-up: team e-scope!!!! :0

my au my rules eva and izzy became really good friends on the playa; izzy isn't afraid of eva (and curbing her anger before it reaches a boiling point) and eva is physically adept enough to restrain izzy from Shenanigans that might be a little Much. but eva doesnt really?? know anything about noah?? but izzy insists on teaming with him for the special (and unbeknownst to her noah wasnt even planning to participate initially) so he must be some level of Not Too Bad if izzy wants anything to do with him that doesnt seem to be related to tormenting the guy

and she thinks hes Fine. apathetic and detached and unpalatable (but then again, everyone in their little trio really is to some degree), but can kind of understand izzys intrigue: hes still A Guy, hes just hidden behind 20 layers of non-substance that are so offputting from the first meeting it makes people steer clear of him.

now with tddddi comes two other pertinent details: the justin line, and the Thing With Duncan.

i personally thing noahs 'he's the anti-me' line is really funny in the context of canon but if you squint it kinda works here? wherein justin is non-speaking yet flaunts himself to be the center of attention and clearly shows intent and capacity to scheme (underdeveloped or no, see: awakeathon), whereas noah speaks a lot yet lets himself fade into the background, showing vague hints of the capacity to scheme but no intention or palpable ambition behind it.

^ am i reaching? maybe. the other option here is noah somehow has seen him in-person before on a modeling or red carpet kind of gig and dislikes him on principle because of it/its a jab at it (smth smth they are both opposite ends of the same industry? justin is the face of it in a manner where noah stays behind the scenes and out of sight)

and the thing with duncan,, hear me out here okay noah does his whole song and dance, goes up to him and patronizes him, and duncan retaliates. however, he curses like a sailor and in noah's head has ruined the footage, therefore instead of further retaliating and potentially invoking actual physical harm he just. doesnt react. at all. duncan looks up at him and hes just dead-eyed staring down at him -- and then he leaves.

^ the scene has been ruined, and everyone else is doing so much that theres no reason to play it up any more. duncan and him arent plot important like how heather and lindsay were, theres no reason for the crew to painstakingly edit his swearing out. they just wont let it reach the final cut. duncan is understandably very confused by this, but at that point noah was already gone to find eva and izzy again (< this is when the cast having a running bet that noahs and android becomes Not a Joke)

but life goes on!!! and in the worlds worst comedy of errors (for noah), izzy ends up dragging him along into the lake, thereby leaving him as a confirmed member of the next season.

^ noah is so angry at this. popping blood vessels. he argues with chris endlessly, straight frothing at the mouth at only having two days of real reprieve before he has to deal with the Same Shit again. and chris gets this, to some degree, but also knows that if theres no explanation for noahs non-appearance to hand the producers, theyll be pissed (since all things considered, noahs pretty damn popular among the fans)

luckily for him, courtney just filed a lawsuit against the show!! and since chris is busy running said show, the producers do not want to deal with it and are willing to hand off the case to anyone else -- hence, chris officially signs noah on as his PA, and noah takes over the court settlements and whatnot.

< though i do imagine the producers would see it as a 'get out of the show' scheme, and thereby push way harder for his involvement in WT as a result

but noah does get a break!!! for now, at least.

#formal thanks to ophe for the cast having a running joke about him being an android #that was Not my idea #before-bed rambling. again #wrote this post eating a sleeve of saltines it was an Experience #soooooo much to say about izzy and her dynamic with noah. sososososo much #is the justin thing reaching? yeah probably idc #character analysis #total drama #td noah #dramaturgyAU #if someone wants to takw this idea and run go ahead im begging someone to share my fascination for the concept of panopticon

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