#i have access to the work anniversary calendar and i was looking at it just now like......damn | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

therealcocoshady · 9 days

Note

Ok sorry for blowing up your asks, but I have one that might be right up your angsty alley…

Marshall is having a particularly hard time on one of the anniversaries of Proof’s passing…🕊️ He’s super vulnerable with reader and she has to comfort him 😔🥺

DIFFICULT 🕊️

Eminem x Assistant Reader

Synopsis : Em is nowhere to be found as you're waiting for him for an important meeting. Turns out... It's the anniversary of Proof's passing and he needs you.

Tags : Vulnerability - Grief - Angst - Comfort

Author's Note : Thank you for this Ask ! I low-key love that you thought of me when it comes to angsty requests 👀. I got inspired and ended up writing quite a bit but I'm afraid it's all over the place. I hope you like it nonetheless. ❤️

Do you know where he is ? Paul asked, visibly unnerved. He should already be here !

He’s coming, you assured the manager. I reminded him of this meeting on Friday, don’t worry, he’s going to show up.

It’s your job to make sure he shows up on time, Y/N, Paul added sternly. That’s what personal assistants are for.

He’s never late, you said. I’m sure there’s a good reason. Something must have come up…

It was unlike Marshall to show up late to a work meeting, especially when it involved music. In the past year, since you had started working for him, he had never shown up late anywhere. If anything, he was a bit neurotic about punctuality. « Early is on time, on time is late » he always said. And when it came to anything regarding his latest album, he tended to show up extremely early, polishing details up until the last minute. Except that, today, he was almost thirty minutes late and you were facing Paul and Dre on your own, and there was only so much small talk you could make.

Look, if the album’s not ready for me to listen to yet, you guys just have to say so, Dre said.

No, it is, Paul assured him. I mean, you know Marshall, he’s always trying to polish and tweak little things, but we have a version that’s more than ready for you. We wouldn’t have you come from LA otherwise…

I’ll try an call him, you said.

You got up and went to your office. You were starting to be a little freaked out. You didn’t want to be dramatic, but you were starting to feel scared that something terrible had happened. One time, he got into a car crash and was not even that late. Thirty minutes late for Marshall was basically four hours late for anyone else. You got out of the room and tried to call him, but he didn’t pick up. Had he lost his phone ? You knew he hated the iPhone you had convinced him to buy - to replace his more than ancient Blackberry - and he used it as little as possible, but him losing anything was unlikely. And he knew about this meeting. You had specifically reminded him of it. He wouldn’t show up late to a meeting with Dre. He had way too much respect for the man. You nervously checked his iCloud calendar, thinking that maybe he was confused about the time. Unlikely but not impossible either. You remembered adding the event « Meeting with Dre - ALBUM VERSION 1 » for this Monday, 9:00 AM a while ago. But it was nowhere to be found. Had it been accidentally deleted ? Had you dropped the ball ? No. Impossible. Not to toot your own horn, but you wouldn’t screw up like that. It was probably a bug. You checked the week’s other events. Deleted too. You knew he had other meetings and studio sessions planned, but they did not appear on the calendar. Weird. Especially since last week’s event were still appearing, and the following week’s too. It looked like someone had cleared this week’s schedule and you knew it wasn’t you. It had to be Marshall, then, since he was the only other person to have access to his calendar. You were worried. He would not clear a whole week’s schedule, especially not when he was nearly done with his album. Something had to have happened. Something awful, by the looks of it. Your mind immediately went to his family. They were the only people he would clear his schedule for. You decided to call Hailie, hoping that nothing awful had happened to her or her sisters.

Hey Y/N, you heard her soft voice say as she picked up the phone. How are you ?

Hey Hailie, you said nervously. Are you alright ?

All good, she said. Why ? Are you ok ? Is there anything wrong ?

Um… I don’t know, you said. I'm trying to reach your Dad. Have you heard of him ?

Not since Thursday, I think. He told me he was spending the weekend with you. What’s wrong ?

He’s just a little late to a meeting, you said as you tried to sound casual. I was worried that something had happened to you, your sisters, Nate…

No, we’re all good, she said reassuringly. Look, I’m in Chicago, but I can try and call him…

Don’t worry about it, you said. Enjoy Chicago.

Thank you ! See you !

Hailie didn’t seem too worried, so there was at least that. However, you were a little bugged off. You absolutely had not spent the weekend with Marshall and, frankly, you were a bit shocked that he had lied to his daughter about it. Not that you never spent the weekend together - in the past six months, it had happened quite a bit - but he was not the type to lie to his daughter. It was odd that he would use you as a lie, especially since your relationship - if you could call it that - was still in the developing stage. As far as Hailie was concerned, you were the closest thing her Dad had to a girlfriend but, in actuality, it was a bit more complicated. It wasn’t necessarily serious or committed, and there most certainly wasn’t any label on it. You were his personal assistant, whom he occasionally fooled around with. The only reason Hailie saw you as his girlfriend was that she had walked in on the two of you making out with very, very few clothes on. Thank God, she was an adult and didn’t really want to know anything about it. No one ever mentioned the incident but she assumed there was something between you and Marshall. And there was. In a way. But he wasn’t really the kind of guy to put a label on it and you knew it. He was extremely guarded and, even though you knew you were one of the people closest to him, you didn’t expect much. He was a really great boss, amazing man and more than satisfactory lover, but you knew him enough to know it would never evolve into anything serious. « I don’t do relationships, you know » he had once told you. And you didn’t mind. You enjoyed things just the way they were. The way you saw it, the sex you sometimes had - usually on work trips or late nights - was a perk to your job, along with the generous salary and health benefits. But regardless of all that, him lying about spending the weekend with you was extremely odd. You tried calling him again, but were sent straight to voicemail. You sheepishly went back to the conference room.

Did you talk to him ? Paul asked.

No news, you said. That’s odd. I’ll go to his place and if he’s not there, I’ll try the hospitals. I’m sorry.

I hope he’s ok, Dre said. Keep us posted ?

Of course.

You made your way to your car and drove to his place. Security knew your car and plates and saw you often enough to let you through the gates. You parked in front of Marshall’s house and immediately noticed that the car he used the most was parked out front. He was home. Thank God, you didn’t have to worry about a car crash. You rang the bell but no one came to open it. Maybe he had slipped in the shower and injured his head ? Or fallen down the stairs ? No. You often joked about him being older but he wasn’t geriatric either. Still, you were worried so you used your spare key and let yourself in.

The house was unusually dark and messy. You checked downstairs, the living room, kitchen, office… It was messy, like someone had rummaged through things, but Marshall was nowhere to be found. You tried every room upstairs, every closet, every bedroom, but he wasn’t there either. You decided to try the only remaining space you hadn’t checked : the basement (you doubted he was in the garage - he liked his cars but not enough to cancel a meeting about music). That’s where you found him : in one of the dimly lit rooms he had converted into a home music studio, laying on the carpet, eyes closed, headphones on his head. You gasped and almost thought he was dead. You immediately rushed to his side and checked his breath. As soon as you approached, he slowly opened his eyes and groaned.

Marshall, are you alright ? You asked. Are you hurt ?

No, he said in a raspy voice before sitting up.

You examined his face : he looked like a zombie, or at least like someone who had forgotten what sleep and food were. And judging by the smell, he had also forgotten about showers. You usually enjoyed his masculine scent but now he was smelling as rank as a teenage boy addicted to video games.

What are you doing here ? He asked.

I came to check you weren’t dead, you said. You missed the meeting with Dre. Paul is furious.

Wait… What day is it ? He asked in confusion.

Monday, you said. April 12th.

Fuck.

He rubbed his eyes and scratched his beard, and you inspected him closer. His eyes were bloodshot, with huge dark circles. The beard he usually kept well-trimmed was all over the place, so was his short hair, and his breath smelled of energy drink. He had always had a penchant for soda and Redbull, but it usually wasn’t to the point of smelling like a candy factory. Well, if you added the smell of sweat, it was more like someone who ran a marathon in the Redbull factory. Marshall looked at you without saying a word.

Are you alright ? You asked.

Does it look like I’m alright ? He groaned.

Not really, you admitted - not really knowing what to say.

Why are you ask, then ?

If you hadn’t been so worried, you would have snapped at him for behaving like an ass, but it wasn’t him. You sighed and looked at the CDs he’d been listening to : « Searching for Jerry Garcia » and « I Miss the Hip Hop Shop » by Proof. That’s when it hit you : today was April 12th and April 11th was the anniversary of his best friend’s passing. The both of you were sitting on the carpet, not saying a word. He knew that you knew.

Do you… Um… Want to talk about it ? You asked tentatively.

I need a shower, he said.

Yes he did. He definitely did. You got up and waited for him to do the same but he simply groaned as he tried to move. You gave him your hand and helped him up as he let out a moan and held his back. You wondered how long he’d been laying there, listening to music and losing track of time. He seemed to have trouble even standing up. « God, he must be exhausted », you thought.

Need help ? You asked.

Y-Yeah, he said.

Shower ?

Yeah.

Without a word, you helped him to the nearest bathroom where he started undressing without even waiting for you to leave. You could feel your cheeks burn. You’d seen him naked before, sure, but this different than the two of you shedding your clothes in a passionate moment. Now, you had the feeling of seeing something you weren’t supposed to. It felt a bit weird. You watched him step in the shower and went upstairs, to his closet, to pick some clothes for him to wear. You grabbed boxers, some sweatpants, a wife beater and a hoodie and put them in the bathroom, near the sink before opening the windows to let in some light and fresh air, as you tidied up a bit. You’d spent some time in his house before but you had never seen the place this messy.

Thanks for the clothes, Marshall said as he emerged from the bathroom.

Feeling better ? You asked.

Yeah.

When was the last time you showered ? You asked.

I don’t know, he shrugged.

Last time you ate ?

Fri…Sat… I don’t know, he replied.

He seemed gaunt and, even if the shower seemed to have done some good, Marshall seemed like a corpse. He was standing there, staring at you, not extremely responsive. You had never seen him like this and it was definitely a far cry from his usual self. Ever since you had met him for the first time, you had found him to have an impressive presence. Whenever he walked into a room, he naturally drew attention to him and he had such charisma that he seemed bigger than he actually was. But for the first time, he looked weak and lost.

Are you hungry ? You asked.

A bit, he replied.

Sit, you said. I’ll prepare something. What do you want ? Pasta ?

Whatever, he said.

He sat on the couch and you made your way to the kitchen. Being the one responsible for his shopping, you knew the pantry like the back of your hand and knew exactly what was in there. You decided to make some homemade spaghetti, using Mom’s Spaghetti sauce with homemade garlic toasts. His lazy comfort food. When you brought his plate to the living room, he was manspreading, looking at the ceiling.

Thanks, he said as you handed him the food. Chips would have been enough, you know ?

You need to eat a real meal, you simply said.

He nodded and started to eat. You noticed he was avoiding your gaze. He usually didn’t have much trouble maintaining eye contact, except for when he was ashamed, or sad, or tired. In this case, you knew it was probably a mixture of everything. There was no doubt as to his exhaustion and sadness, and you knew he would feel ashamed for missing an important work meeting. You looked at him and left the room to go and call Paul.

So ? He asked. How is he ?

He’s… sick, you lied, knowing full well Marshall wouldn’t want you telling people how you had found him.

Sick ? The managed asked. What does he have ?

The flu, you said. It’s pretty nasty. I cleared up his schedule for the week. He needs rest. He’s really sorry about the meeting.

Alright. I’ll call him later, he said. Dre has to leave today, we’ll have to set up another meeting.

I’ll let him know.

You also texted Hailie to let her know you had managed to get ahold of her Dad. When you got back to Marshall, he was looking at a picture frame of him and Proof. From the looks of it, you guessed it was from 2005-2006. You sat next to him in silence.

The flu ? He asked in a raspy voice.

Couldn’t come up with anything better on the spot, you said. At least, it buys you the rest of the week so you can rest.

No need, he said. I can… I can work.

Bullshit, you sighed.

He stared in your eyes for the first time all day and sighed. His eyes went back to the picture frame and you could see hum swallow dryly.

Went was this taken ? You asked.

March 2006, he said in a breaking voice. It’s the last picture of him I have…

His breath was shaky and you could tell he was on the verge if tears. You placed a hand over his and gently stroked his skin.

It’s ok to cry, you know ? You said softly.

You weren’t too sure why you said that. Of course it was ok to cry. A man in his fifties, especially your boss, did not need your permission to cry. Or so you thought. Because as soon as the words left your lips, the tears started to flow and he started sobbing. You put a hand on his back and tried to soothe him while you saw his face redden and scrunch up, his tears wetting his face. It was painful seeing him like this and you wished there was something you could do. If that were possible, you would gladly take his pain and make it yours.

Fu-fuck, I-I’m sorry, he said after a while.

You have nothing to apologize for, you said gently. It’s ok. He was your best friend. It’s ok to be sad.

I-I fucked up…

It’s just a work meeting, you reminded him. We’ll set up another meeting with Dre, I’ll move a couple of appointments, it’s fine.

No, not… I-I…

He was trying to speak but he wasn’t making much sense. He was stuttering, his voice cracking, changing pitch… You put your arms around him, half-expecting him to push you away but he didn’t. You kept running a hand up and down his back to soothe him a bit and it seemed effective.

Thank you, Y/N, he said.

Were you like this all weekend ? You asked.

Yeah…

Is that why you told Hailie I was spending the weekend with you ?

I… Yeah, he said sheepishly. I didn’t want the kids to see me like this.

I see, you said. So… what ? You listened to his music, looked at pictures and lost track of time ?

I guess, he shrugged. I… I tried to go to his grave yesterday but it was packed.

I guess a lot of people miss him, you said.

No, it was… I saw them and they were wearing… My tee-shirts. My merch. They were my fans. On his grave. And it drove me fucking mad. Because I couldn’t even get out of my car, and I had to see these people pay respect but they were fans. They didn’t know him. And I saw the posts on social media. And people keep on making it about me.

His voice broke again. You had often had conversations with him about fame and how he was dealing with it. Most of the time, he was grateful for it, though he often gave the impression that he didn’t really get why he was famous and how people could look up to him so much. « It’s just me », he often said. Deep down, he only saw himself as a guy trying to make it in hip-hop, trying to be the best emcee. Fame was never really part of his plan, though he was grateful for the success and love of people granted him. But the way he was speaking, it seemed like less of a blessing and more of a curse. He explained to you that he felt guilty for people making Proof’s death about him. Sure, he was his best friend, but he was so much more, and he just wished people would respect his legacy and everything he meant to the hip-hop culture. He also felt guilty when he thought about Proof’s family, who didn’t only have to deal with a tragic loss but also his own fame, and always being asked questions about him.

His wife… She always hated me, you know ? He said. She hated all of us. Proof was never home, always either getting in trouble with us or trying to keep us out of it. Now we don’t speak too much and… I mean, I get it, I was his friend, not hers, but… I don’t know. I was supposed to be an uncle to his kids, you know ? I’m supposed to be there for them, not make things difficult. I’m supposed to be the one sending flowers, not receiving them in their place.

Do you keep in touch ? You asked.

I try, he said. I mean, if the kids need something, they know they can call. Sharonda too. She never would, she’s too proud but… Yeah, I just wish I could do more, you know ?

I know, you said. You shouldn’t feel guilty…

No, I should, he shrugged. When he died, I was a massive asshole about it… I mean, I guess I made it a lot about me. But now it makes me so mad. And sad. And I miss him so much and I just wish I could apologize to him.

For what ? You asked as you stroked his hand.

Everything, he shrugged. For being ungrateful and not seeing everything he did to hold down the fort. Proof… He was strong when I was weak. And I never got to tell him how thankful I am. If it weren’t for him, I’d still be making burgers.

I’m sure he knew how much you loved him, you said softly.

I hope, he said. He was everything to me… Like… We didn’t love each other like that, you know. Like, no homo or whatever. But sometimes I think he was the love of my life. In a platonic way. Like, he was my other half, the one who made me a better person. And now that he’s gone… I’m just me. And it’s hard.

You’re still pretty great, you said. And I know he would be proud of you.

I… I don’t know, he said.

He seemed lost in his thoughts. You realized you had been stroking his back the whole time and stopped. He turned to you with his eyebrows furrowed and he didn’t even have to ask for you to resume. It was the first time the two of you had such a prolonged physical contact without it being sexual and you wondered if he noticed, too. He closed his eyes and you looked at him some more. He was clearly exhausted and you weren’t too sure how long he would need to sleep. Probably a long time.

You should go to bed, you said softly.

I guess, he shrugged.

You need rest, you insisted. I’ll do the dishes and go home, ok ? You can call me if you need anything.

Can you stay ? He asked nervously. I… I don’t feel like being… alone.

Sure, you said with a hint of surprise.

Ok.

He got up and headed upstairs. When he noticed you weren’t following him, he turned to you with a raised eyebrow.

You don’t want to come ?

Upstairs ? You asked with your eyebrows furrowed. To your… room ?

You said I needed to sleep, he pointed out. I’m not sleeping on the damn couch.

You shrugged and followed him. That was new. You had slept over a couple of times, but never in the same bed as him. The only circumstances in which you had seen his bedroom were strictly sexual. But as soon as the deed was done, he wouldn’t sleep in the same bed as you. And even when you had slept with him during work trips, you’d been back to your own room after. It was one of the many ways in which he could be guarded and you knew it had nothing to do with you. He just had his quirky, peculiar ways. He got in bed and looked at you intently.

Come, he said.

Ok, you said as you sat next to him.

Remove your socks, he instructed.

I’m not removing my socks, you said. My feet are cold.

You’re not getting in my bed with your dirty socks, he pointed out.

I just put them on this morning, you said. They’re not dirty.

It’s a pet peeve, he said. Just… Socks off, ok ? And get under the covers.

You scoffed. If he was in a good enough state to be oddly specific - as he often was about practically everything in his life - it was a good sign. You took your socks off and sat in bed, under the covers. It felt weird but Marshall didn’t seem to pick on it. He simply laid there and stared at you.

You’re not laying down ? He finally asked.

Um… Sitting is fine, you said.

Can you lie down, please ? He asked.

You looked at him with a raised eyebrow but still did as you were told. As soon as you laid down next to him, he closed his eyes. Given how exhausted he looked, you half-expected him to fall asleep right then and there but he didn’t. Instead, he kept on tossing and turning.

What’s up ? You asked. Do you need anything ?

I think it’s the Redbull, he said. I haven’t drank much else in days. It’s keeping me awake.

Oh, you said. Let’s talk, then.

About what ? He asked.

I don’t know, you shrugged. We can talk about anything. What’s up with the cleared schedule on iCloud ? Did you do that ?

Yeah… I don’t know, he said sheepishly. I… I went to the cemetery yesterday and when I couldn’t go and had to go home, I guess I lost it. There were these thoughts in my head and… I’m not sure I can do it anymore. Without Proof it’s… too hard.

Tears were welling in his eyes again. It had been more than fifteen years since Proof’s passing and Marshall had put out quite a few albums in that time, but the wound still seemed fresh. It wasn’t a matter of his technical ability to do it without Proof - of course he could - it was about whether or not he wanted to.

Ok, you said.

Ok ? He asked.

What do you want me to say ? You asked. Do you want me to plead for you to keep going ? I’m not going to. If you want to quit and retire, that’s ok, you’re allowed.

Really ?

I mean… Yeah, you said simply. It’s your decision. If you think you don’t have anything else to bring to the table, that’s fine. You’ve had a good run and a career people can only dream of having. If you decide to put an end to it, that’s fine.

Wait… No, he said. I mean, your job is to talk me out of it. Is that some reverse psychology thing ?

It’s Paul’s job to talk you out of it, you clarified. Me, I’m just a personal assistant. My job is to manage your schedule and make life easier for you. Whether or not you put out music, my job’s fine as long as you need me to do your shopping, come to football games with you and remind you of your dentist’s appointments. Next one is in two months by the way.

He chuckled and you couldn’t help but smile. His face was still puffy and he still didn’t look his best, but hearing him laugh - however lightly - was good. He was a great person and you hated seeing him like this. Of all the people you had ever met, he was the one who had suffered the most, and deserved it the least. He was a good, hardworking, honest and generous man, on top of being one of the most talented people ever. His sadness was breaking your heart. If his career was making him sad, if keeping on going without Proof was too hard, he should be allowed to quit. He had earned it and, in your opinion, he didn’t have anything left to prove to anyone.

So you don’t care whether I end my career or not ? He asked with an amused look.

As a fan, I think it would be tragic, you said. Especially If you don’t put out that last album. It’s your best work so far. But as a person… What I care about is you, Marshall. I’m in the front row, seeing how hard you work every day. If you say that’s too hard, then that’s too hard and I trust you on that. If you think you’ll be happier doing something else, just enjoying life with your family and focusing on your charity, you should do that.

Proof would kick my ass for thinking of quitting, he said pensively.

I think Proof would want you to be happy, you pointed out.

He hummed and looked at you. He brought a hand to your face and stroked your face as a single tear rolled on his cheek. You smiled and wiped the tear, letting your hand cup his face. You stared at each other in silence. It was unusual but, oddly enough, not uncomfortable.

Thank you for staying, Y/N, he simply said before letting out a small yawn.

You should really try and get some sleep, you replied softly.

He nodded and closed his eyes as you heard him take deep breaths. A couple of minutes later, he was asleep. You could hear him snore lightly. You looked at your phone to check the time. It was only 1PM. You figured you’d stay there for a while and let him sleep while you answered a couple of e-mails. After a couple of hours, Marshall was still sleeping soundly. You thought you might as well do some tidying up in the house, but as soon as you tried to move, you felt his arm around your waist, bringing you closer to him. You smiled to yourself as you realized it was the first time you actually cuddled with him - and you enjoyed it more than you probably should. Your back was against his chest and you could feel his heartbeat. This and the sensation of his arm around you were incredibly soothing and you allowed yourself to close your eyes for a minute.

(…)

Marshall groaned as you gently shook his shoulder to try and wake him up. He scrunched up his nose and let out a few obscenities. He looked pissed off as he opened his eyes.

What time is it ? He groaned.

About 7PM, you said.

You better have a good reason to wake me up, he sighed.

I think I do. You have clothes on your bed and ten minutes to get changed, ok ?

I’m not getting dressed, and I’m not going out, he said with an eye roll.

And I’m not giving you a choice, you said with a smile. Get up. Please. You won’t regret it.

You made your way downstairs and prepared a bottle of water and a snack for Marshall as you waited for him. When he arrived, he looked a bit puzzled. He was still clearly tired but he looked a lot better. You made him get in your car and drove to the cemetery. You had called ahead of time and asked if they would do you a favor and keep the place open for a couple more hours. You used the « Marshall Mathers » card, which always worked when it came to getting a table at a fancy restaurant, borrowing a private jet or keeping a store open when Marshall needed to shop for his daughters’ birthday.

What are we doing here ? He asked as you parked out front.

You know what we’re doing here, you said. It’s after hours and you get to pay your respects in peace.

You… You arranged for this ?

I did, you said. They’ll be open until 8:30PM. I’m sorry, I didn’t find a florist open, though.

He looked at you in shock and immediately engulfed you in a hug before whispering a « thank you » in your ear before getting out of the car. An hour later, you were leaning on the hood of your car, smoking a cigarette when Marshall came back. He seemed more at peace. You could tell he had cried - as people often do when they’re visiting someone’s grave - but he seemed alright nonetheless. He walked up to you and took you by surprise by kissing you. Contrary to all the kisses you’d shared until now, this one wasn’t greedy, hungry or passionate. It was tender and soft. Intimate and emotional.

A-Are you alright ? You asked.

Yeah, he hummed. Thank you for taking me.

You’re welcome, you said with a smile.

Ready to go ? He asked.

Almost, you said as you pointed to your cigarette - knowing full well the hatred he had of your smoking habit.

The drive home was a bit weird. You had kissed before but this felt different. You had always enjoyed his kisses but this one was, by far, your favorite. You felt a little guilty for enjoying it so much. If you were honest with yourself, it was a little scary, too. The only reason you had managed not to catch feelings for Marshall was because he was usually guarded and there were a lot of boundaries. But after today, after seeing him this open and vulnerable, you weren’t too sure you could go back to having casual sex with him. It would be too dangerous.

Did you know Proof’s family would be there ? He asked as you parked in front of his place.

Were they ? You asked in surprise. No, I didn’t.

The cemetery must have called them, then, he shrugged.

I’m sorry, you said. I insisted that you have your privacy…

It’s fine, he said. I talked to Sharonda. Nasaan was here too.

How did it go ?

Pretty well, he said. I’m seeing them later this week. Over dinner.

That’s great, you replied with a smile. I’m happy for you.

Thank you Y/N, he said emotionally. For everything you always do for me. I mean, I wouldn’t be able to get through life without you. You put up with me, you make life bearable… And… Thank you for today, especially.

You’re welcome, you said with a small smile.

He cupped your face and kissed you again. You leaned into the kiss more than you should. A part of you knew that you should push him away… But you couldn’t bring yourself to do it. Not after he had such a hard day. So you kissed him back and enjoyed the sensation of his tongue caressing yours, of his fingers in your hair.

Now, you should go and get some rest, you said softly.

Are you coming ? He asked as he stroked your cheek.

Do you need me ?

Y/N… I always need you.

And just like that… You knew you were screwed. You felt an army of butterflies in your stomach and your brain was nowhere to be found. It had left the chat as soon as you heard Marshall’s soft voice say he needed you. You were unable to think so your emotions took over as you exited the car and got inside the house, his hand in yours.

#eminem #marshall mathers #slim shady #eminem fanfiction #eminem x reader #eminem fluff #eminem imagine #marshall mathers x reader #marshall mathers imagine

74 notes · View notes

amor-immortalem · 1 year

Text

Forgetful

Summary: Mammon and Arella’s anniversary is coming up but with as busy as life in the Devildom can get, Arella forgets. Can she make it up to her favorite demon?

Genre: A lil bit of fluff, lil bit of angst

A/N: I wanted to write something about their anniversary but I severely underestimated the amount of time I had to write this before the 28th came about so it’s gonna be a 2 parter.

Life these days is kind of hectic for Arella. Between balancing her tole as human world ambassador, being a member of RAD’s student council, keeping up with friends from the human world, trying to make enough time in the day to spend with her boyfriend, keeping up her grades at RAD, and being a good mother all at the same time, the human finds it hard to even keep her head on straight. She feels like she’s drowning- like she’s bitten off more than she can chew. She needs a break from at least one of those things. Maybe if she could just get a week to herself, then things would go back to normal… hopefully.

So why does she feel so nervous- like she’s forgetting something important? There were no exams coming up at school. Midterms were a couple months out at most. The only birthday coming up within the next week was Cyrus’ but she was planning to take the toddler with her anyway and just have the birthday celebration up there. What else was she missing? Looking at her phone’s calendar, nothing of note really stands out. She’d just have to figure it out later when she has access to her planner.

・・・〆・・・

“I think that’s a great idea.” Thirteen says as she and Arella discuss the human’s plan about Arella leaving for the human realm for a short break. “I’ll be up there too from time to time so maybe we can spend some quality time together without Mammon trying to invite himself along.”

“If you don’t mind Cyrus tagging along then I don’t mind meeting you out somewhere.”

“Why can’t I just come to your place? It can’t be a date if you’re toting a little one around with you all night. Plus its easier than having to worry about finding child frendly places for us to hang out.”

“I just… I’d prefer it if we met up somewhere. If Cyrus is a concern for you, ten I’m sure Aubrie wouldn’t mind babysitting for a night.”

“The munchkin isn’t a concern for me. He’s a part of the package deal you come with- one adorable kid and his insufferable father.”

“Thirteen,” Arella scolds her half-heartedly. “Mammon’s not insufferable, you just have to get past that hot-and-cold attitude he has and then he’s really quite sweet...”

Its silent between them for a moment before:

”You’re not hiding anything from me are you?” There’s an accusatory tone to the reaper’s voice. “You trust me right?”

“Of course I do,” Arella takes a moment to consider the rest of her answer. “And I’m not hiding anything from you I just… I don’t know, its silly… I barely even let the boys into my human world home- even Mammon’s only ever been there twice. I guess you could say I just want that to be the one part of my past that isn’t touched by all the day to day nonsense that I go through here in the Devildom…”

“Yeah that makes sense- magic does tend to linger longer in the human world than it does here…” Thirteen hums, ”I just think it would be easier on you in the long run.”

“I’ll think about it, alright? If I decide that it’s just easier to stay in then I’ll text you my address.”

“Alright, my candles are done forming so I’ll let you go so I can get back to work. Love you. See you soon.”

“I love you too,” Is all the human answers as she hangs up. She places her phone on the desk before getting up to stretch.

“You’re goin’ up to the human world?” Mammon’s voice startles her.

“I was planning on it yes. I need a bit of a break. I was going to take Cyrus with me too.” She takes a couple steps and wraps her arms around his neck and balances on her tiptoes to place a kiss on the demon’s cheek. “Or do you not want me to take him.”

“I mean if you say you need a break then I don’t think ya should..” Mammon hums, wrapping his arms around her. “But you’ll miss his birthday depending on when you go and he hasn’t been up to the human world since he was an infant…”

“It’s really all up to you,” she smiles, “because I’m fine either way. I’m leaving in a couple days.”

“A couple days?” It gives the white-haired man pause, “Why am I only just hearing about this now?”

“I mean I did text you about it last week and our chat log shows you read my message. I just figured I caught you at a bad time and you forgot to reply.”

Mammon fishes his phone from his pocket and looks at his messages. “Huh… I’ll be damned, I did… damn…I even had a surprise planned for the 28th but I guess it can wait until you get back.”

“Oh… I’m sorry I ruined your plans. I’ll find a way to make it up to you. Promise.”

“Ya better.” The demon huffs as he leans in for a kiss, “You can start right now.”

“Dinner!”

Mammon and Arella break apart at the sound of Asmo’s voice. The human chuckles softly at the white-haired demon’s grumbles of disappointment.

“We can continue this later, Dear. After Cyrus goes down for bed.” She takes his hand and laces their fingers together. “Let’s get down to dinner before everything gets taken.”

・・・〆・・・

Its been four days since Arella started her small break in the human world and she still can’t help but feel like she’s forgetting something. She didn’t have anything marked down on her calendar for this entire week except for Cyrus’ birthday.

“Whatever it is, I must’ve figured I wouldn’t need to write it down to remember it… not the brightest move on my part… I should call Mammon and see if he might know.”

Without thinking too much on it, Arella is dialing her boyfriend’s number. With the amount of times that it rings. She’s almost afraid he won’t answer but eventually he does.

“Yeah?” He answers quickly. It almost sounds like he’s trying to hide the way it sounds like he’s been crying.

“Are you okay?” Forget asking whether or not he knew of anything important was coming up for her, this takes precedence. “You sound like you’ve been crying?”

“I wasn’t cryin’,” Mammon’s defense was almost too quick. “It’s just been a rough day- didn’t sleep well last night.”

“I’m sorry, Honey, is there anything I can do for you to make you feel better right now?” Its quiet for a bit and Arella worries the line may have been disconnected. “Mammon?”

“Hm?”

“I asked if there was anything I could do for you.”

“Nah, there’s nothin’. How’s your vacation goin’? The baby bein’ good for ya?”

“Of course he is,” she chuckles, “he’s always good for me. He’s down for his nap right now.”

“That’s good at least. You can get a couple minutes to yourself… Well I gotta go. Hafta get ready for a photoshoot. Is there anything you wanna say to me before I hang up?”

“Mmm…” Arella thinks for a moment, “Only that I love you and I miss you and I’ll see you when I get back.”

There’s a pause at the other end of the line almost as if he’s waiting for her to say more.

“That’s it?” Mammon tries to hide it, but there’s a slight hint of hurt behind his words. “Nothin’ else?”

“Was I supposed to say something else?” There’s genuine confusion in the human’s voice.

“Nah… nevermind. Love you too. See ya when you guys get back.” The line clicks off leaving Arella with more confusion at the abruptness of it all.

・・・〆・・・

To be continued

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me swd #obey me! shall we date?#obey me mammon #om! mammon #obey me oc #om! oc #arella #mammon x oc #obey me thirteen #om! thirteen #obey me 13 #om! 13

3 notes · View notes

natsumi-no-hotaru · 2 years

Photo

There and back again: a megane-ko’s adventure

Part 3: In memoriam of a bygone winter

AKA. A more-than-1-year anniversary post.

This is for you, 002.

[Previously: Part 2 - in which I couldn’t stop ogling at My Lady’s legs and made known my Zhongguang Manifesto. But content-wise, this is more a continuation of my GI experience in Part 1.]

Osmanthus wine tastes the same as I remember... But where are those who share the memory?

Nostalgia is perhaps an unusual mood to indulge in at the beginning of the year, when it’s the norm to look forward and not backward. But at some parts of the world like mine, where the lunar calendar still holds considerable importance, the Gregorian New Year heralds the end of another zodiac year, reminding all to wrap up unfinished work for a fresh start.

If you are not a first-timer to my tumblr, you may be aware that I have recently taken even more of my sweet time with posting, all the more so on GI. So in a way, part 3 is a challenge for myself - can I finish it before the Year of the Tiger arrives?

... Yeah, given my track record, you know where to place the bet. To put in gacha terms, I don’t think you’re gonna win the 50:50.

Self-defeating thoughts aside, it is high time to deliver on the promise made since Part 1 - to recount my adventure with the Samaritan in the snow.

To briefly recap, winter 2020 was a time of equal turbulence and excitement for me. Overloaded by work at the office, I sought escape in GI, accompanied by my coworkers, A-senpai (who has long quit the game by the time I was writing this post) and L-kun (who has now become Y-kun). After much fumbling and failing, not to mention the self-inflicted hurdle in the form of an inferiority complex, I finally arrived at a place of mental equilibrium, where I could enjoy GI without being wracked by hyper-competitiveness and torn by the stigma of spending money on game. It was tough weathering the mid-game - the period from Adventure Rank (AR) 35 to 44 - when the world level (difficulty of mob and bosses) went up much faster than the pace of investment into my characters, and the 5-star artifact drop rate was pretty dismal. Yet, it was an unforgettable time, filled with lovely moments of camaraderie, hours of joint exploration, and merry, nail-biting co-op trips for artifact grinding or event bosses. The struggle was so much fun because I never lacked for good company.

The next leg of my journey took me to Dragonspine, a then-newly released region with wintry aesthetics and mountainous setting perfectly made for a Christmas adventure. Dragonspine was also very special for it was the first area with adverse environmental effect. The arctic climes were not just for show - you would start to feel the chills settling in as soon as you step away from a heat source, and once the Sheer Cold bar is full, your HP will steadily drop unless you have a way to keep yourself warm. This made exploration of Dragonspine particularly challenging, especially when you may be waylaid by mobs in locations without close access to a fire or a brazier, and your Pyro characters may not be very strong or properly invested. Given such conditions and my noob skills, it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that my exploration progress in Dragonspine was well, quite modest in the early weeks of this region’s release.

One beautiful day, taking a break from Dragonspine’s chills, I went to a pond in Mondo to catch frogs for Dustproof Potion (enhances Geo damage). Suddenly, my therapeutic routine was disturbed by a request to enter my world (aka. co-op mode). Normally, whenever someone wants to visit your world, a message will appear asking if you wish to welcome this person or not. Unbeknownst to me, the co-op settings were changed to welcoming all visitors automatically, without the inquiry message. Out of nowhere, a Diluc appeared. With no more prompting than my casual “hi”, the stranger asked if they could pick some of my Windwheel Asters. I had no need for those flowers so I told them to feel free and take as many as he needed. Normally, I would pay some attention as to where the stranger teleported to and what else they might be doing. But it was my chill time and I have not caught all the frogs yet.

Fifteen minutes or so passed and I was just about to forget about the stranger’s presence in my world, if not for a message cropping up on the left, something along the line of “I’m done. What are you up to?” Unsatisfied that I was more or less up to not much usefulness, he asked if I finished exploring Dragonspine and, upon my reply to the negative, immediately proceeded to drag my ass off to said freezing and inhospitable place offered a helping hand to speed things up. It was not everyday that a thankful and courteous fellow traveler made such an offer so I took them up on it and teleported to the Frost-bearing Tree.

Thus our joint exploration began along the meandering path up the snow-capped mountains. Helpful Stranger™ quickly set themself to work - getting rid of ice-shield hilichurls and Frostarm Lawachurls that barred our way or guarded treasure chests (or “boxes”, as the stranger liked to shorten), lighting the torches and braziers on the way to keep the Sheer Cold at bay, and pointing out the locations of Crimson Agate (items to level up the Frost-bearing Tree and earn its rewards), all the while keeping up a steady stream of solicitous questions about my progress in the game. It was lovely to talk to Stranger - they were baffled about my decision to skip commissions to stay at AR 35 (”but why not get free primogems?”), but most understanding about my frustration over artifact grinding (”you will get better artifacts after AR 40″) and super encouraging when I talked about my wish to be a Ningguang main (”your Ningguang will get stronger”). We totally bonded over being absolute simps for the dragon-tattooed lady - “no need for reactions!” and could not stop singing praises of Ningguang to save our lives (not that we were in any danger with a very capable Diluc).

Time flew by when one was on a mission and soon enough it was approaching midnight. Yet Helpful Stranger™ was only more fired up, pushing forward and taking the lead in the spirit of Caesar - they came, they saw, they conquered and kicked ass. Often enough, my horrid navigational skills would slow me down; hardly did I arrive at the scene of action only to find the fight already over and Diluc was jumping up and down near a chest or a Crimson Agate, as if to mark the spot with an X. We traversed the desolate landscape, combing through the columns and ruins at the Entombed City, dropping down the Starglow Cavern to solve the Fire Seelie puzzles, and frantically searching for Scarlet Quartz while scaling frozen ridges. What still impressed on me, a year later, was how patient Stranger was, no matter how often I fell down from slippery ledges, how long it took for me to clear the time trials we came across (or not clear at all). Helpful Stranger™ was nothing but sincere and and supportive, constantly telling me that it was fine, that they were not going anywhere, that they were still waiting for me to slowpoke my way to get here. I’m sure that if I were to play with them in person, there would likely be exaggerated eyerolls or the occasional bursts of laughter at my various failings, but even then, not an unkind word would be uttered. They would still believe that I could do it, be it battling a Ruin Grader or solving a Seelie puzzle --- well, at least let me have a couple of turns at it, before jumping in to incinerate all with a sizzling Phoenix.

Three hours have passed since we travelled together and the second hour of the morning had struck. It was time for Helpful Stranger™ to leave, cos it was quite late and their phone was close to out of battery. We bid a swift but fond farewell, eagerly looking forward to the next time we join forces to conquer all. One Ningguang lover, added to the friend list!

The heady excitement of the late night spilled into the next day, as I told my colleagues of my encounter with this super nice person who helped me explore Dragonspine for three hours straight, with only some Windwheel Asters for compensation. Y-kun was quite impressed, especially at the luck that Helpful Stranger™ had to have pulled Diluc as a F2P, and agreed that we would try calling on him for extra firepower, literally, during our co-op artifact domain runs. In high spirits, I called them my Samaritan, or Sama for short. The title grew on me and became the way I referred to them from then on.

My next outings with Sama took us back to Minlin and Lisha, where plenty of treasure chests awaited discovery (”go for a walk with me. I’ll get you free primogems.”) Along the way, we talked a bit more about ourselves and our Travelers’ namesakes. Sama turned out to be a Filipino boy in university, currently dating a girl, and raising a cat (or cats?). His Traveler’s namesake is a reference to the anime Darling in the Franxx, a big favorite of his. He asked if my Traveler’s name (Altair) came from Assassin’s Creed, to which I said nope (Shoukoku no Altair is a bit obscure for most people, huh?). Sometimes, we would share brief snippets of our lives - the food we ate (”do you eat chicken with adobo?”) or the kind of day we had. But more often than not, the topics of our conversations would return to our progress in GI, our luck with gacha pulls (”are you luckier because you put in money?”), whales (”I wish I had that much money!”), and my laggy gaming experience (”try to switch to xyz settings”).

Sama’s generous spirit and all-time readiness to lend a helping hand quickly endeared him to me and I truly looked forward to introducing him to Y-kun in game, and to us three playing in co-op. Such an opportunity soon came to us in the form of Hypostatic Symphony, a series of combat challenges against elemental cube bosses with greater variety of attacks than those found in the overworld. Suffice to say that this event exceeded my abilities and was far too draining for Y-kun to go solo. Of course, it would be simple enough to do the challenge in easy mode to get primogems, the most valuable reward, and skip hard mode which gave useful but farm-able stuff like Mora, talent books and crystals. But somehow neither of us was willing to settle for the minimum and I couldn’t, for the life of me, say exactly what drove us to go the extra mile.

And so, the long-awaited moment arrived at last: Sama was introduced to Y-kun, also known as “the guy with Ganyu”, and off we went to conquer the Hypostasis challenges. It took us a while to put together the right team and strategy for taking down those pesky cubes, and for me to remember the cubes’ attack patterns and mechanics. I recall us taking all sorts of buffs from food items and potions, even running out of ingredients (lizard tails for cryo buff) to make them, and still struggling to survive and deal sufficient damage at critical moments. For me, the worst of them was the Anemo Hypostasis. My abysmal coordination and laggy laptop prevented me from gliding properly to collect all the anemo particles to prevent the cube from healing itself. What ended up happening was Sama and Y-kun taking on collection duty, instead of dealing damage, and me well... making sure to stay alive. The less painful one was the Geo Hypostasis, in which I was marginally more useful in using Zhongli and Noelle to break the basalt columns.

But the harder it was, the more rewarding victory became. We had so much fun throughout the whole 7 challenges - having each other’s back, healing, picking up the slack, being bait (dat me), coming up with the most optimal strategies for our handful of usable characters. Having me as part of the team sometimes hindered more than helped, but both Y-kun and Sama did not mind it at all. Their patience and tenacity pulled us through, and we each ended up with more than 14000 points for the entire event, enough to get all the primos, talent and experience books, and best of all - the event namecard to commemorate our success. The moment of claiming those rewards is certainly one of my most exhilarating GI experiences to date.

After the Hypostatic Symphony, the three of us teamed up often for domain runs, mostly Clear Pool for the Noblesse Oblige set (when the exchange mechanism of Artifact Strongbox had yet to exist), Domain of Guyun for Archaic Petra and Retracing Bolide (way back when these were the only sets available to Zhongli) and Midsummer Courtyard for Thundering Fury (goodness, the drop rate was abysmal but again, not much choice in artifacts for Fischl back then). If memory serves me well, we often suffered casualties in Clear Pool, because of the three Abyss Mages ganging up and none of us had a well invested Anemo character to swirl. Our usual strategy was to split up the Mages, with us taking care of one Mage each, or to divide the team in half, with 2 persons tackling the Pyro Mage first and then coming back together for the other two. Y-kun would often use Childe, Sama sticking to his trusty Diluc and I would bring Zhongli and Qiqi or just Kaeya/Xingqiu, depending on whose world we visited for co-op. Soon enough, the time spent on each domain run started to drop with practice and improved teamwork. Artifact farming, for a while, felt less like chores and more like fun, relaxing times with some occasional mishaps (poor Sama, sometime I didn’t heal him in time lol).

Once our daily resins were all spent, we would run around in the open world (often mine), having so much fun from chasing each other, gliding to pretty spots, gathering materials and beating up world bosses. Genshin felt much more novel back in those days, when the lack of time, not space for exploration, was the issue. The continent of Teyvat was much smaller than what has been unveiled to date, but I enjoyed myself greatly, especially the excellent company. And how could I not, when there was always a companion who would jump over to help out, regardless of whether he had already used up his resins or not, and be so generous with his time in tagging along my exploration of the open world?

And so these tender days passed by and the Lunar New Year of 2021 came, bringing with it the first Lantern Rite celebration of GI. The festive atmosphere was truly a welcoming change of pace, immersive and heartwarming. Making the Xiao lanterns, spreading the joy of Lantern Rite to faraway corners of Liyue, and persuading Xiao to join in the release of the giant Mingxiao lantern (shaped like a Qilin, the illuminated beast of Ganyu’s heritage) were all the things that I greatly enjoyed and still fondly recalled. And no Lantern Rite is complete without a few runs of Theater Mechanicus. This rendition of the tower defense is special not only because it was the first time, but also the only time that I solely played it in co-op mode.

I did not expect to enjoy it so much, given my general disinterest in the more strategic side of gaming. Reluctance was my initial reaction and I felt quite lost in trying to tackle this challenge on my own. But Sama came to the rescue, as per my request to team up, and I soon had a change of heart. There was this sense of exhilaration in following Sama’s directions on where to place this and that tower or a Geo construct, the way one would a commander in battle, and seeing how well it all turned out. At some point, I even called Sama “general” and he was inordinately pleased about it. It felt great to entrust him with leading us to victory and just do my part (and laugh a little at his occasional miscalculations). One stage after another, we cleared them all without breaking a sweat.

It was also around this time that Sama’s misperception about my gender was cleared up. Honestly speaking, I would have liked him to continue calling me “bro” for a little longer because being mistaken for another gender was actually pretty fun. The cat was out of the bag during one of our three-person co-op sessions. Most of the details have escaped me but in short, Y-kun saw Sama addressing me by “dude” or some similar form of masculine address, found it to be quite hilarious and decided to rectify Sama’s mistake via in-game private messaging. I was not wholly on board with the revelation but from Y-kun’s report, Sama was a real good sport over it. He was very surprised (to the point of even asking Y-kun if I was a male but preferred to be addressed as a female) but not unpleasantly so. Upon Y-kun’s explanation that I hid my gender to avoid being treated differently, Sama simply sought to reassure Y-kun of his respect for gamers, regardless of their gender. Female gamers were pretty cool to him, as his girlfriend was one too.

And so our gaming routine continued, with no substantive change in how Sama interacted with me. While I was no longer a “bro”, I was given a new term of endearment - “Ningbabe”, which, admittedly, was quite sweet. It really felt good, seeing it in the chat. I even jokingly told him to not go behind his girlfriend’s back when he first called me that, and got another sweet reply (of a different kind) - “Nah, I would never do that to my girl”. I really enjoyed how comfortable it was to speak my mind with Sama, because he faced my queries straight on, no flinchin’.

Spring went by leisurely in Genshin, in spite of the tumultuous drama engulfing my life back then (of which A-senpai’s departure from GI was part of the fallout). As if to evoke the guardian Archon of the city himself, the Windblume festival came like a breath of fresh air, relieving me of my woes and wrath (for a while) with a storyline starring all my old Mondo favorites: Venti, Kaeya, and Razor. And of course, this was also when I finally got the drunk bard, the “clickbait” that drew me to GI from the very beginning.

Then came version 1.5, featuring the second act of Zhongli’s Historia Antigua quest. The Traveler came face-to-face with Azhdaha, an old dragon pal of Morax, who sought to break free from the seal placed on him for breach of contract. It was a beautiful continuation of Sal Flore (the first act), further driving home the message of irreversible erosion by time, be it a primordial bond of friendship or your very own self. The ironic mirroring of loss between game and life cuts deep, considering how good we (senpai, Y-kun, and I) had it in January and how rapidly things fell apart.

Nonetheless, a haven from the suffocation of workplace drama was what GI meant to me, with solace and rejuvenation to be derived from designing your Traveler’s own realm, aka. the Serenitea Pot. Upon arrival, you would be taken to the wide open space of your choice - be it an isle surrounded by clear azure waters, mountain peaks adorned with rushing waterfalls, or a retreat in the clouds a la Laputa, and treated to views of endless horizon and perpetually beautiful weather. It was approaching summer and I was yearning desperately for holidays at the beach, so naturally, I went for the Cool Isle realm layout. Feasting my eyes on the sands, sun and sea, I turned around to find a delightful mansion in the style of Dawn Winery, complete with a spacious verandah, wooden pillars, balconies, red brick roof and spires. A soothing calmness took over me and construction work began in my little corner of Teyvat.

This new feature also enabled me to spend more time with my friend, Sama. As I reached higher AR and made more informed investments on characters, farming artifacts and world bosses became much easier, and later down the line, even faster on my own. Such independence was liberating on one hand, but on the other, it reduced the opportunities for Sama to hang out in my world. For a while, the Serenitea Pot mechanism gave the co-op mode a new sense of relevance. Friends dropping by your Pot can help shorten the time in crafting all furnishings by 4 hours, or in case of Y-kun, help out and use Diluc to burn down the lawn and grass around my mansion. This provides an excellent incentive to visiting each other’s Pot, considering that all furnishings normally would take up 12 hours++ to craft. The faster and the more you craft, the more realm currency you would obtain, which in turn allows you to buy more goodies for construction or valuable items for character investment.

At the beginning, Sama was pretty reluctant to show me his Serenitea realm, claiming that it was not ready or not good enough. So I gave him a tour of my pot first, albeit still in its early stage. My idea was to re-create a sort of old-timey and quaint country-home vibe, with the mansion encircled by tall golden and amber-leaved trees, gardens, fountains, flowers, benches and tea-tables, where you can relax and enjoy the sun setting over the water. Charming little cottages would dot the isle and the adjacent shoreline, complete with grapevines, hay bales, wine barrels, wooden carts and stone wells. Scant be the furnishings and decorations that I managed to put up, Sama still very much enjoyed the arrangement. We had a lovely time catching up and indulging in the simple pleasures: running, gliding and taking in the views that the island has to offer.

After much prodding, Sama also invited me to his realm. Decked out in the Floating Abode style, his space is less of an escapist hangout and more where you can be far from the madding crowd in your mind. Sama lacked a clear direction of what to do with his realm but he did not give himself enough credit for these small lovely ideas for indoor decor. One of them was to place wooden round tables and chairs along the hallway outside the rooms on the 2nd floor, especially where light shines through windows and cast shade on the furniture.

This nifty detail ended up inspiring me to turn my mansion into a cross between college library and cozy book cafe. Tall gleaming wood shelves, stands and cabinets, filled with books and decoration trinkets, are placed in close vicinity with comfy sofa sets and seating arrangements, and together they give off this feeling of lived-in tranquility that is incredibly comforting. Add in the cute doggies and kitties frolicking around the house, and there you have it, the perfect summer getaway for me.

After the Serenitea Pot, our next spot of fun was to be found at the Golden Apple Archipelago, a limited-time area to keep impatient travelers in their seat and drum up hype for the then-upcoming release of Inazuma, also another set of islands. After having only Liyue, Mondo and the tiny Dragonspine to explore for so long, the new summer-themed area brought a brief moment of freshness to the game. As Sama said, exploring the Archipelago felt like playing GI anew. Travelling from shore to shore on a little vessel, discovering the islands one by one and tinkling with new puzzle mechanisms gave one a taste of that sorely-missed exhilaration and thrill, as if time was rewound to when the Traveler woke up on the beach of Mondo and made his first steps in this brave new world.

Despite this excellent filler (and other quests and events), there’s no denying that the exasperating wait across several patches for the next big update (aka. Inazuma) took a toll on most players, especially those who had long finished all exploration and reached a high AR early on. Since patch 1.4, there was nothing else to do but farming artifacts when you have gone through the crumbs of new content doled out. So it was no surprise that Sama started showing up less and less, and every time I logged in, only the status of “online 1 day ago” on his namecard gave me any indication that he was still around. This state of affairs saddened me but I brushed it aside, believing that it was only temporary; certainly, patch 2.0 would certainly alleviate his fatigue of GI and rekindle his excitement, like in the cases of me and Y-kun. Little did I know that my time with Sama was running out, engrossed as I was by the contentious release of Raiden Shogun, the new Archon quest, and Yoimiya’s melodious Kansai-ben twang.

Exploring Inazuma and farming handguards with Y-kun

As summer drew to an end, Sama shared with me the reason for his decreasing online presence. As a new graduate, real life (read: new job) had him very much occupied and left him with little time to explore Inazuma. These days, he logged in only out of routine and a longing for that sense of belonging again. Our chats, brief and far in between, often took a nostalgic turn as we reminisced about the good old days. I told him of how awed I still was by how he ended up helping me explore Dragonspine for 3 hours straight in exchange for just a few windwheel asters. Apparently, the flowers were to ascend Bennett, whom he just got that day, so in his own words, I gotta “say thanks to Benny”.

Not only time but also technology was not on Sama’s side. With every new patch, GI took up more space on one’s device, adding to an formidable size for a game supposedly playable on a phone. And Sama’s phone, though recently bought, couldn’t keep up with the pace of GI’s expansion. There was a question that needed answering, and even though he had made up his mind for a while before telling me, it was not as simple as to just quit. Once in September, he even asked if I could take over his account because he did not like leaving it to collect dust. He truly wanted someone to keep playing it, and at that point, was seriously thinking about entrusting it to me. I did not take the offer because I was hoping against hope that he would just take a break for some months and return if he had the account still.

Things did not turn out that way and after roughly a month of Sama’s absence, the parting of ways came on a fine autumn weekend.

It was a small blessing that both Y-kun and I were available to log in then. While waiting for Y-kun, I took Sama to Watatsumi Island, where he had yet to open on his map. It felt pretty good, showing him the view from the Sangonomiya Shrine next to Sama’s Kokomi, the "lovely lady” he got with what’s left of his primos.

Together, the three of us had one last hurrah, roaming around and having a real blast over taking out overworld and weekly bosses for old time’s sake.

Our last pictures taken, farewell was said and all good times must end.

After the boss fights, Sama asked us to log off first, because he wanted to stay a little longer by himself. Later on, I got his last message.

There’s no helping the inevitable but I am thankful that we got to give him a proper send-off. Y-kun said that he must have felt pretty proud of me, cos I am his living legacy. I felt quite embarrassed and also incredibly humbled by those words. Indeed, I have come a long way from being bogged by self-doubt and assorted mental baggage, and can now face challenges head-on. But, for such transformation to be possible and so enjoyable, it is in no small part thanks to Sama and Y-kun.

My story of Sama may have come to an end but my journey in Teyvat still goes on, with new encounters to be had and new friends made. His departure taught me to be bolder in accepting people’s requests to join my world and sending my requests to others. Earlier this year, close to the end of the Lantern Rite, a player named Luna asked for permission to visit my world. Out of some whim, I clicked yes and was in for the biggest surprise ever. They did not come over for some resources or materials, but to make a strange request - to follow them to a hill in the surroundings of Wangshu Inn, sit on a boulder and wait.

And voila, fireworks! They cleverly set up the firework launcher behind a bush at lower elevation, took position and then started to play Twinkle twinkle little star in accompaniment. The suspense, the lights and music together bowled me over, all the more so since this was a complete stranger, who only wished to be a messenger of joy. I could hardly believe my eyes and ears - it felt more like the stuff of dream and fantasy than reality!

The display was short but sweet, and I thanked them profusely for it and the kind wishes that followed. I did not want the moment to end too soon so I suggested that we both put up our firework launchers and set them off at the same time. After all, the seats were made for two.

It took us a second try to coordinate the settings so that our fireworks would explode and end at the same time.

Oh what a night!

Inspired by this well-meaning stranger’s impromptu gift, I was super motivated to make it the “gift that keeps giving” and pass on the exuberance running through my veins. Luckily, some one on my list was online - an affable player named Liliana, another ardent fan of Ningguang (and collector of kickass ladies like Yae and Yelan) I met while looking for a world to get some Cecilia. And so I came over to their world, asked for a few minutes of their time and put on the firework show, albeit without music accompaniment.

It was super gratifying to see that Liliana enjoyed the gift so much, and at that moment, all was all right with the world, as strangers and newly-made friends shared in the festivity and did something unconditionally nice for each other.

Every now and then, a bittersweet yearning would rise in me for those long past days, when there was no goodbye to be had. But not all is lost - Y-kun is still playing with me, for which I’m very grateful and much comforted. New doors will lead to new people, if I choose to be adventurous and welcoming. Like the stories of Inazuma, though filled with tragedy, pain and loss, there is hope and healing at the end; perhaps I will also find worthwhile connections so long as I continue on this journey.

I shall stop my rambling here. Again, sorry for taking so long with it, Y-kun!!! After this, I will stop writing about GI for a while to return to Chihayafuru season 3. It’s something I’ve been dying to do, especially since I’ve got such an enthusiastic cheerleader (thanks @comfysocksfirst)!

To all who have read any of my megane-ko adventure posts: thank you so so so much, even if you’re only hear to see the pictures. To those who have read all 3 parts: you are amazing!!!! *gives out tricolor dango*

Until next time. Altair, out.

#natsumi talks #genshin impact #dragonspine #benny adventure team #bennett genshin impact #tribute to a ningguang lover #tribute to an online friend

4 notes · View notes

wanderingaunt · 1 year

Text

Year End Reflection Practice

Tis the season for gathering, celebrating, giving & receiving, and completion as we look forward to this new year. So often we’re in a space of readiness—ready for the holidays to come so that we can gather with loved ones both near and far away; ready for the stress of gathering to melt away (oh the irony there); ready for the year to be over so that new energy can breathe life into your world. While readiness is a beautiful anticipatory space to be in, it is also one that can pull us away from this moment right here.

Whether you had a year full of excitement and growth, one of heaviness, heartache, and struggle, or somewhere in between, it’s important to take time to go inward and reflect on where you started and where you are now before jumping ahead.

So often this moment of reflection is rushed or missed entirely. We want to skip over it because of the time and energy it takes, or we wish to avoid it because looking back can be too painful. Yet, I believe it is one of the most beneficial and needed work we can do and one of the greatest gifts we can offer ourselves before launching into the next chapter. You will see things you may not have noticed before and discover valuable lessons that will leave you with gratitude.

This is a great practice to do at the end of a calendar year, the time around your birthday, and any other noteworthy milestone or anniversary.

My birthday happens to fall just 12 days before the end of the calendar year, so I have the luxury of doing my year-end reflection and birthday reflection at the same time. Depending on when your birthday falls, you may like to do another reflection at that time.

Year-End or Milestone Reflection Practice

Choose your space. Where is somewhere that inspires you to create and receive insights? Is it outside somewhere in nature? On a run or on a hike? Is it in the quiet of your room with candles lit? Is it in a cozy coffee shop while sipping on your favorite beverage?

Choose how you would like to capture your reflections. Journal and a favorite pen. Laptop. Voice note. Choose what feels aligned for you. I personally like to write it all out in my journal first and then document it on my computer.

Set the tone for your experience. I like to start my reflection experience with meditation. I call in my guides, helpers, and angels to support me in remembering. I go for a quiet walk in nature to reflect and receive inspiration. I use Oracle cards to support summing up my theme for the year. If you don’t have access to any of this or wish to go about it another way, do you. Do what feels most aligned and inspiring to you.

Inventory Time. This is a great way to go back through your year and recall any highlights, challenges, or areas of growth you want to capture.

What was your word, phrase, or intention for the year? What did you set at the beginning of the year as your area of focus? What intentions did you set or commitments did you make?

Go through the year month by month or by season: Write any major themes, milestones, or experiences that come to mind. If you are a documenter, you can go back through your photos on your phone or on social media to see where you were. Make a list under each month or season of what you notice and remember.

List all the places you traveled to: Did you travel to another city or state? Of go outside of the country? Where did you go? Write down what you remember.

Support team: Who were your top supporters throughout the year? Who were the people who supported you by your side and behind the scenes? Who were the strangers who showed up along the way to support you?

Go back to your word, phrase, or intention for the year. How did this stay present throughout the year? Did you keep your commitments or release them? Did you forget about what you desired to be your theme or area of focus? Even if you forgot, how can you connect the dots from your highlights, challenges, and experiences to your initial intention? If you switched or added an intention, note that. Write anything that surfaces for you around this.

What were some of your favorite memories or experiences from the year? Take a moment to reflect and write out or note what comes to you.

What were some of the challenges or trials you faced during the year? Take a deep breath. Allow yourself to be present to what comes and give yourself extra love and grace as you reflect.

What surprised you most about this past year? Are there any experiences, people, or opportunities that came into your life or surprised you?

What word would you use to sum up your past year? Look over your list and see if there is a certain theme or word that comes to mind. How does this word connect to your initial intention or theme for the year?

Gratitudes. As you look back over your list, what are you most grateful for this year? Go back to your Support team and who showed up for you. List any areas of surprises, miracles, or people/opportunities who came into your experience and supported you.

Choose your word, phrase, or theme for the new year. As you look back on your reflections, what energy do you wish to embody or call in for the coming year?

Write down the words that come to you. Say each word aloud and see how it feels in your body. Which word or words resonate most for you?

Pull Oracle cards to support in choosing your theme. Grab your favorite deck, or if you don’t have a deck, you can choose a deck for free here. I’ve also listed some of my favorite decks below. Take a deep breath. Focus on the energy you are calling in. From a space of stillness ask, “What is the theme or energy I am calling in for this new year?” Shuffle the cards until a card falls out or spread the cards across the table or floor and choose a card.

Read the message and choose a word or phrase that aligns with the message.

Put your word/theme/phrase somewhere you can be present to it. Write it on a post-it and place it on your mirror or computer. Choose a photo that embodies the word and put it as the background on your phone or computer. Write it atop your calendar each month so it’s present for you.

DANCE. CELEBRATE. SHARE. Soak in this experience by doing something fun for yourself. Have a dance party, or celebrate with a treat or experience. Get together with friends or call a friend to share your experience. You can also do this practice with friends and each share at the end to ritualize the experience and set the energy for the coming year.

What did you learn this year? What was your theme for the year? What are you calling in for the coming year? Drop in the comments and let me know!

My Favorite Oracle Decks for Reflection Rituals

Wisdom of the Oracle - Colette Baron-Reid

Enchanted Map Oracle - Colette Baron-Reid

The Wild Unknown Archetypes Guidebook - Kim Krans

The Wild Unknown Alchemy Guidebook - Kim Krans

0 notes

ensignabby · 3 years

Text

143, A Destiel Ficlet

“What’s this?” Dean asked, putting down his burger and sucking some errant barbecue sauce from his thumb before reaching for the proffered box.

Cas had slipped it across the library table, letting his fingers linger when Dean’s met his, and reluctantly relinquished the small wrapped gift. The angel shrugged and seemed awkward and unsure, which Dean found nothing but adorable. “It’s, uh, well it’s for you. To commemorate.”

“Commemorate? What day is it?” Dean relied heavily on cases to create the context of his calendar, and after a few days at the bunker, he had started to lose track. When did they part ways with Sammy and Eileen when they finished that vamp nest? Thursday?

Cas sighed, only mildly put-out that Dean didn’t automatically know. “It’s the eighteenth of September.”

“Eighteenth of...” It came to Dean like a flash, like the burst of fresh air that hit his lungs those years ago as he emerged from the pit. “Cas...” He looked down at the carefully wrapped box with new understanding. “Is this an anniversary present?”

He was answered by small “yes” and a delightful pink hue spreading through Cas’ cheeks and reaching to the tips of his ears. “Aw, babe... Well, a Happy ‘Grip Me Tight’ to you, too. Although, I hadn’t thought to get you anything. I didn’t really know if dates mattered to you much, given, you know, the fact that you existed since practically ever.”

Cas looked away, lost in some faraway thought. “They didn’t. The unending march of millennia beared no consequence to the constancy of heaven, but,” he turned back to Dean, his blue eyes piercing his green ones. “The day I met you, I started counting. It’s the only date that has ever mattered.”

It’s Dean’s turn to blush now, and he doesn’t know how to respond to such unabashed declarations like that. He never has. They always steal his breath and sting his eyes. He clears his throat and reaches across the table to squeeze his angel’s hand in a silent gesture before bringing his attention back to the small box on the table.

Wrapped in light blue, Dean makes short work of the paper and finds a small wooden ring box. It makes his hands tremble. He knows what boxes like this mean. Does Cas? One glance up at the expectant face across from him tells him that he probably does. A deep breath steadies him and Dean opens the box.

The ring is platinum, a plain band with beveled edges that suits Dean’s sensibilities well. “Castiel...” he murmurs, taking it out of its setting to further appreciate the design. The soft yellow glow of the bunker’s lights reflect off the surface, highlighting the small engraving hidden in the inside of the band. “143...” He looks up again, seeing Cas’ obvious pleasure in watching Dean admire his gift. “What does 143 mean?”

Cas leaned in further. “I don’t know if you’re familiar with a man named Fred Rogers”

“Mr. Rogers? From TV? Of course I do. The man was the closest thing I had to a grandfather growing up.” He thought back to when he was little, where in a life of inconsistency he could always rely on the fact that every motel room had a television. And every television gave him access to that calming figure who told him it was okay to feel what he felt, even if John Winchester said different.

Cas elaborated. “Fred was a remarkable man. His place in heaven was secured for him long ago, and when Jack tore down the walls, I can assure you, he had a crowd waiting to greet him.”

“I can imagine.”

“What I admired most about him was his ability to see the good in everyone, to trust in the best in humanity. And he would always say to those that were listening, honestly and without reservation, ‘I like you, just the way you are.’ It’s a beautiful sentiment.”

Dean watched Cas speak, a small grin on his face, enjoying watching his partner enthuse about the host of a children’s television show, of all things. He flipped the ring over again, feeling the weight of it, noting that this ring looked perfectly sized for his fourth finger on his left hand. “Where does the 143 come in?”

“May I?” Asked Cas, not waiting for an answer before leaving his seat and coming around the edge of the table. He took the hand of Dean’s that was holding the ring and held it between both of his, finding himself kneeling next to him, prostrate before the object of his affection.

“Fred always liked this number. You see, it stood for something. One letter for the first word; four letters for the second word; and three letters for the third word. One. Four. Three.”

Something clicked in Dean’s brain. “I Love You.” He said, breath hitching.

“And I do, Dean Winchester. I love you, just the way you are. Just the way I always have from the first time I saw you. You are always beautiful to me.” Castiel was smiling through tears, taking the ring out of Dean’s hand and easing it gently over the knuckle of his ring finger. “That number serves as a reminder, and if you let me, I promise I will spend the rest of our lives making sure you will never need it.”

And dammit, now Dean was crying too. Fat, warm tears that blur his vision and spill unrestrained until he uses his free hand to wipe his face on his flannel. “Cas, did you just propose to me using a quote from Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood?”

Castiel’s smile starts to waver, “Was that not clear? I thought this was...”

Dean rolled his eyes. “C’mere” and he dragged the angel up from his knees by the lapels of his trenchcoat, depositing him squarely in his lap. Leaving Cas no time to acclimate, he tangled his fingers in the nape of that dark hair and pulled him in, a crashing of lips, heat and stubble. And love. So much love.

After a moment, Cas pulled back panting, looking disheveled and glorious. “So I take that it’s a yes?”

Dean drinks in those brilliant blue eyes only inches from his, the glint of the engagement ring on his hand, and he can’t help but feel like every inch of him is vibrating with happiness. “Of course it is,” he breathes, and he leans in again to kiss his fiancé.

Oh, it’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood

#supernatural #Destiel #deancas #Destiel fic #fan fic #Castiel #Dean Winchester #my fic #I’ll post it on ao3 soon too

81 notes · View notes

theonceoverthinker · 3 years

Text

423. Hold on! Look, I promise I’ll have tonight’s Fair Game HC out in a TIMEly manner!

Tonight, I’ve got some HCs about Qrow, Clover, and their relationship to scheduling for you!

-Clover’s organized his schedule with the use of his scroll for as far back as he can remember. Clover first started using a planner a couple of years before entering Atlas Academy. He was already interested in attending school there, and the coursework/grades needed to get in was no joke, so he started hunkering down early on in the year with his syllabi and his scroll and never looked back. It’s not detailed to the last second or anything and won’t list things like spontaneous shopping trips or chores or things like that, but if it’s work-related, Clover will mark it down.

-Clover shares his scroll’s schedule with Ironwood, the other Ace Ops, Winter, and eventually, Qrow. He doesn’t really have anything to hide and since he’s a high-ranking part of the military, he feels like it’s important that those he works with know where he is and what he’s doing (And of course, a more mellow version of this mindset exists with Qrow once he leaves Atlas and he unshares his calendar with everyone who isn’t Qrow). However, the one exception to this transparency is that Clover will create a secret calendar on his scroll that only he will have access to when he wants to go shop for gifts or surprises for his co-workers or Qrow for special occasions.

-Qrow doesn’t use a planner or his scroll to organize the events in his life, but he doesn’t need to. He’s always had a good memory, and while it doesn’t seem like a lot, writing down or even typing events in his scroll just bogs him down the same way it does when one has to sit through a boring video game tutorial when they already know how to play the game. While still not using a physical or digital list, when organizing himself for things like chores, he doesn’t rely on his memory as much to ensure that he takes care of everything. It’s more like an internal mental chant that grows far more chill as it sinks itself into his memory.

-The Ebi-Branwen household has one wall calendar in it. Qrow and Clover keep it in the kitchen, either on their fridge or on a cabinet door. It's a themed calendar, and the usual contenders for themes of the year are vacation spots, national day calendars (Or Remnant’s equivalent), aquatic life, or birds. Clover doesn’t tell anyone, but he looks forward all month long during the end of the year to going to shop for their new calendar. Qrow can absolutely see right through that proverbial mask and makes no secret of it (”Am I that obvious?” “Clover, you couldn’t be more obvious if you were wearing a clown wig while thinking about it.”).

-Early on in the year, they stick events like birthdays of close friends and family, anniversaries, vacations, and other such things on the calendar. As the year progresses, they add in things like dinners and parties they were invited to or are hosting, weddings, babysitting and petsitting requests from their adopted kids, hangouts, and doctor’s appointments. In the morning, both of them will peruse it and discuss whatever events (Or lack of events) coming their way.

Tags under the cut!

Tagging @skybird13 @whipped4qrow @mooksie01 @luck-of-the-caw @xwildangel @solitude-of-stars @vastnessofthespiral @o0nashipear0o @unfairgamey @doctorrwby @clover-and-co @megan-atthedisco @wash-my-brain @bisexualdisasterqrow @thursdayseraph @doubledexterity @rwby-things-i-guess @atlas-heartthrob @the-answer-was-bi-klance @compoterie @thuskindlyiboop @oceansquid @transdemion @deltastream21 @mimiori @xya-hunter @delta-altair @genderqueer-turtle @roman-torchtwink @subatomictealeaves @drbtinglecannon @saphiralunaris @pretentiouskneecaps @amxngsthxmans @ayomez13 @carbonated-table-spices @darkestsiren @chaosgameingkoi @collectingsparechangemadeeasy @michaels-daughter2005 @youmaywanttoduck @lovethewitchofendor @victorious1956 @kendalllwayland @madamoisellesica

Want to be tagged in future Fair Game HC’s (Or untagged, I understand) and be the first to catch all of the romance, fluff, drama, and puns (Sometimes all at the same time)? Send me a reply, PM, or ask, and it shall be done!

Would you also like to check out my old Fair Game HC’s? Who wouldn’t? Well, here’s a link to my Fair Game HC archives!!!!

#fair game #qrow branwen #clover ebi #rwby #lucky charms #luckbirds #luck birds #fairgame #qrow x clover #qrover #fair game hcs #423

34 notes · View notes

fratresdei · 3 years

Text

How to Create Sacred Space

Sacred spaces are some of the clearest examples we have of humanity’s active involvement in cultivating the Sacred. Within sacred spaces, the lines between “what is ‘just people’ and “what is ‘purely divine,'” are, blessedly, blurred to indistinction.

For example, when humans build temples, they often believe that holy presence resides within it. However, there is no delusion that the temple was not built by human hands. That reality is in fact celebrated! Within sacred space we are free to relish in our participation, or co-creation, of divine presence in our world. This power we possess does not detract from the mystery of sacred space, but is something to cherish. If we have the power to construct and nurture sacred space, that says a lot about our standing in the universe.

So, what constitutes a sacred space? The answer could include many possibilities: perhaps you have a favorite quiet spot in your place of worship or out in nature. Maybe you grew up with a shrine or altar in the home, or you may be seeking to curate and maintain a space for yourself. The space may be hidden away where only you can access it, or out in the open where you spend most of your day. There may be objects that represent deities, loved ones, prayers or intentions present. It could be a clear, clean space, empty of clutter, where the mind and spirit feel free to declutter as well. Your sacred space may simply be your own body. While the size and structure of a personal sacred space may vary, the core is the same: a place that has been set aside for contemplation or communion with the divine. The beauty of a sacred space, like many facets of spiritual life, derives from the meaning it carries for you.

To help illustrate the many variations and nuances of a sacred space, Fratres Dei Spiritual Direction Contributor Saint Gibson @stgibsonofficial and Communications Manager Caroline Crook @yourfavoriteauntcarol (yours truly), have each shared a picture of our own sacred spaces and described the contents therein.

Saint’s Space

There are a number of sacred spaces scattered throughout my house; the rose-scented Our Lady of Guadalupe candle and collection of crystals in my bedroom, the shelf where my fiancé and I remember our departed ancestors with little photos and trinkets, and the font of holy water affixed to the wall by the front door. But the most prominent sacred space in my home is the altar table set up in the living room, underneath a gilded icon of the Madonna and child.

On it, I keep all my candles and figurines representing the saints and angels, and some beloved keepsakes, like dried flowers, gifted rosaries, and letters from friends. The plate in the center of the altar features a painting of the last supper and is used for offerings: generally water, and sometimes alcohol or milk depending on whether or not that's appropriate to the petition or the day on the church calendar. My household celebrates both the Christian holidays and the pagan wheel of the year, so the decorations on the altar change out with feast days and seasons. The candles around the offering plate change, but there's always a sacred heart of Jesus and a Mary mother of God burning away, and usually a Saint Jude and a Saint Joseph as well. I burn a rainbow candle to remember the queer saints of the church both known and unknown, and to ask for God's protection on LGBTQ+ people worldwide.

My patron saint is the archangel Uriel, patron of confirmation in the Episcopal church and of poets and scholars widely. My golden Uriel figurine presides over his side of the altar, along with a figurine of the archangel Raphael, my fiancé's patron. We've got all sorts of talismans and charms representing the four archangels, and we have a fiery red candle for the archangel Michael that stands looped in a necklace featuring a ward against the evil eye. A golden pietà, my fiancé's greatest thrift store find, watches over all the candles. We've also got a colored figurine of the Infant of Prague standing proudly over a photograph of my fiancé and I. That's because the very first letter my fiancé ever sent me was a photograph of the Infant when he was traveling abroad, and we like to think he watches over us.

There are prayer cards littered about, and I often find myself reaching for Saint Ignatius of Loyola or Saint John the Revelator in times of need. We also usually keep incense burning in a metal cauldron that's always stuffed full of salt and ashes. Frankincense, rose, and lemongrass are my favorites. There are also many taper candles that I've saved from trips to other churches or from sung masses on Michaelmas and Christmas Eve.

I've been curating sacred space in every dorm room and apartment I've lived in for years, and this is by far my most favorite space yet. There's enough room to stand while you pray and move items around, but it's small enough that I could pack up everything on the altar into one box if I needed to. The table stands right between the living room and the kitchen, in the heart of the home, and it makes me feel like blessings are being disseminated from the altar to every room in the house. It's a way to keep a little bit of divinity always within arms reach, incarnate in rosaries and candles and bottles of holy water. With my altar nearby, I feel prepared for any spiritual celebration or crisis, and I know exactly where to retrieve up my spiritual tools when the occasion calls for it.

Caroline’s Space

Let’s call my sacred space an acoustic version of what a sacred space can be. It’s only a few months old; yet another quarantine project. Cluttered? Yes. Often mistaken as just a shelf for all my candles? Also yes. But it serves my spiritual life in ways that I personally find intuitive and accessible.

Of the three bookshelves in my apartment, this one is in a central spot in the living room, facing the couch. It’s part of the space and rhythm where most of my daily life takes place. Especially during quarantine when my brain fog is even worse than normal, it’s nice to be able to naturally glance over at this shelf and quickly check in with its contents.

Said contents are 95% candles. Whenever I need to set aside some time for an intentional, spiritually fulfilling practice (whether prayer, yoga, reading, writing, or just a break from social media) I light a candle. On days of significance (birthdays, anniversaries, etc.) or to pray for a loved one, I’ll light a smaller tealight candle in the centerpiece and let it burn for the day.

The remaining 5% is all gifted, bought or found objects from friends and family members. The centerpiece is a candle/incense holder one of my oldest and dearest friends gave to me. There is a glass dish of crystals, shells and sharks’ teeth, all collected over the years between Florida and DC, with family and friends. The glass bottle in the corner was a gift from a friend’s wedding last summer, and I keep that filled with rainwater or holy water, depending on what’s at hand. There’s a crystal seashell towards the back that was a gift from my late grandmother. Each of these objects, to me, represents the many connections, joys and loves in my life. I’m also part magpie, so it’s nice to have a place where these odds and ends I collect can be 1) on display, 2) out of the way.

Other objects come and go, as I like to place items on this shelf that symbolize what’s on my heart at the time. Coins, written turns of phrase, scraps from old clothes, photos of loved ones, etc. Occasionally the odd tarot card, if I’m looking for a stronger visual.

For years this surface was just part candle repository, part please-God-do-not-forget-to-return-these-library-books shelf. It had a vague purpose, and certainly held things that are important to me, but not in an especially meaningful way. The act of curating this space -- choosing that shelf, cleaning it up, deciding what to place where, and maintaining it over time -- has been a source of calm, inspiration, and reflection. It’s still a work in progress though; I have a holly wreath I place around the centerpiece during the holidays, and am looking into getting a wreath to celebrate each season in the year. To, you know, help me remember that time is still passing in quarantine (I want to say April was… two weeks ago?)

If you feel so inclined, we would love to hear from you as well: what does a sacred space mean to you? What sacred spaces have you cultivated or visited?

If you’re curious about cultivating your own sacred space with the help of an expert, book your first free virtual session with Fratres Dei Spiritual Direction in the comments.

Saint offers tarot readings that are affirming, insightful and welcome to all. Check out Holy Roots Tarot using the link in the comments.

February 18, 2021 | Denver, Colorado

22 notes · View notes

rosemarion · 3 years

Text

PAIRING: Thirteen x Rose

SUMMARY: The Doctor and Rose meet, many years after Doomsday. (Ignoring the events of "journey's end")

CHAPTER: 1/1

thanks to @loupettes for always being an inspiration and for always encouraging me

Please do submit ideas/requests/prompts to me!

Phone

It was an average day for Rose Tyler. She finished her shift at Torchwood, ran home and worked on her TARDIS. It was nearly finished. It took years to make, because it had to get her back to the Doctor, through a vortex, that not even he could get through. It was a long time since she had last seen him. And even longer since she'd seen him happy.

She sat, fiddling with what appeared to be an old camcorder strapped to a gameboy, strapped to a miniature fireplace. She wacked it with a hammer, and ran around the makeshift TARDIS fiddling with buttons and staring intensely at screens. She looked at a mirror and appeared to see something in the corner of it. She thought she saw him. But she knew he wouldn't look the same as he did then. God, what if he had moved on. What if he loved someone else. He burnt up a sun for her. Surely he couldn't have moved on that fast. She sat there staring intensely at the corner of that mirror. Why wasn't he here? He loved her. She loved him. He should be here, with her. She should be with him. Because they loved each other. Even though he had never said it. The looks he gave her proved it to her. The way he smiled at her. The way he raised his eyebrows at her. The way he reached for her hand.

She smiled at the memory. Grimacing, she remembered how she had to leave him. It was no use looking back now. She was looking forward; to forever with him. Her TARDIS was now working and she could finally be with him. She kissed her parents and her little brother goodbye. Jackie knew, in that moment, Rose wasn't coming back. But Jackie also knew the Doctor was the love of Rose's life, and how much Rose deserved a happy ending.

The familiar noise of a TARDIS washed over Rose as she piloted herself to the estate she grew up in. If she landed on the right date - the anniversary of the day they got separated - maybe he would be there. Unless he had forgotten about her and moved on. If not she could always travel back to just before the war happened, and pick up some of their stuff they had to leave back on earth when she and her family ‘died’. She'd hang around there for a day or two, she decided. The Doctor was never great with timings. Rose climbed the stairs with her chips, exactly like their first date. She peered into a window and looked at the calendar. She had arrived perfectly on time.

The Doctor landed in the Powell estate. Many years had passed since she met Rose. Back when she was a he. God, Rose wouldn't recognise her. What she would do to see her, and finally finish that sentence. And kiss her. The Doctor shouldn't get her hopes up, though. Rose was happy and the Doctor certainly couldn't get her back to her. Rose wouldn't have access to the materials to get herself here either. The Doctor sat down with her chips and cried. Why couldn't she make Rose come back? She was the last of the time lords. She'd lost everyone on Gallifrey because of the time war, and then she'd lost Rose, the love of her life. She stiffened. Rose wouldn't want her crying now. As she wiped her eyes, she looked to see a figure in the corner of her eye. Blonde, and walking into a box. Minutes later the girl emerged in new clothing. She looked a lot like Rose. But it couldn't be Rose. It couldn't be. And anyway, Rose wouldn't know it was her Doctor, sitting waiting for her.. Would Rose even love her? She wasn't the Doctor Rose had loved. He regenerated long ago. And part of the Doctor died on that day, on the beach.

Rose changed her clothes in her TARDIS. Her TARDIS wasn't as good as the doctor's, but it did the trick. She was here. He wasn't. Maybe he was. He must've changed his face. That woman over there was looking at her intensely. Surely he wasn't… a… woman... Rose thought. She is hot though. He was hot too, but Rose certainly liked the new him. The new her. Rose knew she was bisexual, but, she still hasn't expected the Doctor to be a woman. She didn't think it could happen. Rose was into it though. Maybe that woman wasn't even the Doctor? Maybe he would be here in a couple of hours. She could always call him. Or her. He always picked up the phone.

The Doctor saw the blonde figure looking at her. Their eyes interlocked for a brief moment, but the blonde figure looked away. Rose was even more beautiful now. She was sure it was her. Rose. Rose must be here, somehow. The Doctor could run up and kiss her right now. If that even was Rose. It couldn't be. Surely. The Doctor would approach her, ask for directions or something. Rose would know her then. Or she could explain. God. What if Rose wasn't into women. Her thoughts were inurrupted when the TARDIS phone rang, as the Doctor was getting ready to approach her.

The Doctor answered. Rose's voice echoed through the phone. She said, "Doctor. I’m here.” The Doctor turned around. Their eyes locked in a moment that could only be that of a time lord and her long lost girlfriend that could never be reunited, but somehow, were. They dropped the phones and ran towards each other. Time and space had been cruel to them. But, they had taken time and space on and bent it into their own. The doctor held Rose's hand. She looked into Rose's tear filled eyes and whispered:

"Rose Tyler, I love you"

#doctor x rose #rose tyler #doctor who fandom #13 x rose #13th doctor #david tennant #billie piper #jodie whittaker #doomsday #dw fanfic #doctor who fanfic #rose fanfic #thirteen x rose #thirteenth doctor

33 notes · View notes

chargetheintruder · 3 years

Text

My one-year pandemic anniversary.

I likely won't have much time tomorrow, the 17th to actually do much online, to honor my fifty-two weeks of strangeness with COVID-19, beyond mark my calendars with something like:

One Year does not equal two weeks, damn it.

But even so, I should likely post something, even if a day early, just to take note of what happened to me, what I've lost, and so on.

Because you see, I went into 2020 on meds for everything (mood disorder, prostate issues and all that) and with plans. I did. I was still thinking I could recover some clothing and furniture for this penalty box of an apartment I'm half-stuck with, and that I could maybe get some new friends or a girlfriend sometime soon.

Then this pandemic hit. Only at first it was an outbreak and I had gotten it twisted because like a lot of folks early on I was working on partial info at best. I live in a blue state and near a University campus, so I jumped to some conclusions about how this was going to be a "campus illness" and how red staters were just partying it up because no campuses meant no outbreak, right?

Wrong. This was a pandemic, at least partially because a) some 5 million people went to the Wuhan province in the PRC to celebrate the Lunar New Year and many of them likely were Patient Zeroes, and b) because a lot of those people spread the thing to Europe first, insuring further spread.

So really, losing my chance to vote on that Election Day in the Democratic Primaries (because of lockdown) so that someone other than Biden would get chosen was the least of my worries. I had to get used to distancing, abusing my sleeves for coughs and sneezes, THEN masks, and also dealing with crazy people and only those being anti-mask for any reason, while LOTS of people were still against WASHING THEIR HANDS.

And also. . . I had the problems I had with my forced moveout of August 28, 2018, largely because I needed to be IN TOWN, since I had no car, true, but also because I had problems with LACK OF HUMAN CONTACT. Guess what this pandemic, then, shoved down everyone's throat (except for people with very nice internet connections)? Right. And here I was desperately trying to keep it together for the longest time with no internet connections because of outdated equipment, but also because I didn't want to give in to Comcast's monopoly power over this entire damned town (right next door) where I was forced to move. Yeah.

Fast-forward to October of 2020. I didn't like Biden but Trump was hellbent on becoming Hitler Lite, and it was clear everyone with half a brain had to stop Trump. So I took my mail-in ballot, filled out and everything, to a ballot box that I thought would be safe. That entailed a short bus ride on a route I was no longer familiar with. I came masked up. I rode in the center of the bus as usual. An older lady up front was coughing up a lung and not, NOT wearing her mask over her nose, and barely over her mouth.

I got sick about a week later and looking back, I'm pretty sure it was COVID-19. I took no chances and self-quarantined for a month to be safe to everyone else around me. I gave in and had internet by then, even if my access to my own Chromebook was super-limited still (thanks Google, you jerks). I could make it. The virus itself seemed to only give me digestive/GI issues and body aches, no big deal, right?

Problem was, I started coughing and feeling tired and dizzy all the time afterward. Long COVID, made worse by my being in a sick-house of an apartment building where the lease said it was a "no-smoking building" but the tenants and especially my neighbors, just gave no fucks and kept lighting it up in their apartments and polluting my own (under and through the baseboards). And it was all I could do to stay online and push others to vote, and support Georgia, and to be patient with Team Victim in the hopes that something would be done about the bastards who got us into the mess. You know, the landlords and rich bitches, and yes, the local University too, who invited all of the Han Chinese exchange students here to my hometown, had out-of-state, red-state landlords show up and pander to them exclusively, to the point that locals were ran out of town wherever possible? Those guys.

Those red-state, Republican guys. But in the process, I got re-addicted to chatting with my long-distance flirt on the internet, among lots of other things, my health got worse and it got to where I barely got out once a week, then once every 2-3 weeks, because of virus surges. Getting out was rough anyway because of the masks--nobody had a face, which made it hard for me to talk to people and not be freaked out and paranoid. The only uncanny valley issue I really have--facelessness--and it was the one I had to deal with. And I had lost my friends, mostly, except for the last pen-pal I have out-of-state, and she's busy with her husband and family too.

Point is, here I am now. A year into this. Worn-out, ragged, depressed when I already had depression, in bad health when I already had old-fart health issues, nothing to do anywhere outside when I had little to nothing to do inside to begin with. No, really, I don't go out to eat, just to eat out of a bag in the parking lot, or to walk it home and it gets cold, sorry. And ordering pizza and cheesy bread really only does so much. My life and finances were already ruined from the forced move-out and now there's literally nothing, no friends locally, no social contact, nothing, nothing, nothing, thanks to this plague, this plague, this plague, and people get to hurt us again, a thousand-plus times as badly as 9-11-2001 did, and they get to walk, and walk and walk. Meaning the Han Chinese, the landlords from Trumps on down, and also the alt-reich supporting the shit-show.

I hope you can see where this would make a fellow a bit crazy. More so than usual. I would hope the vaccines make things all right again, but even that has problems since it lets people off the hook. And also, since I have a bit of a ruined trash-mouth that's maybe half my fault? *lol* Meaning I might look better with a mask on in perpetuity, ugh, even if I don't feel like it.

What do you do?

#One year in #COVID 19 #depression #lonliness #ruined life #ruined society

3 notes · View notes

maxismatchccworld · 4 years

Text

Patch Notes

Update 12/12/2019 PC: 1.59.73.1020 / Mac: 1.59.73.1220

Hello Simmers!

It’s been quite the year for The Sims 4! We blew past the game’s 5th anniversary with no signs of slowing down. One of the community’s most highly requested expansion packs just launched recently, and we hope you’re all enjoying getting educated in Discover University. In case you haven’t heard, we’ve also launched another community Stuff Pack project, where your collective votes will decide the path of yet another pack coming to The Sims 4. And of course, The Sims’ franchise 20th anniversary is just over the horizon, which we’re looking forward to celebrating with you.

Today’s update has been influenced by you as well... We set aside time to specifically address issues that you’ve let us know are important to your in-game experience, and we hope the long list of fixes and improvements you’ll find below will lead to many hours of fun playing The Sims 4. In addition, we’ve squeezed in a few un-planned extras we hope you’ll enjoy. Not only have we added some new music tracks to the game, but we’ve also converted a number of hairstyles to now also be available for children and toddlers. While the adult versions of these styles will remain exclusive to whichever pack they originally came from, we hope you’ll all enjoy these additional options for your Sim’s little ones.

While Maxis will soon be taking a short break to enjoy the holidays (merry Winterfest, and a Happy New Year!), we’ll be back for another packed year for The Sims 4 in 2020. See you then!

-SimGuruGraham, ft. SimGuruGnome

The Music

The following music has been added to the alternative station:

“Nicknames”

Performed by Dayglow

Written by Sloan Struble

Recording courtesy of AWAL Digital Ltd.

“4am”

Performed by girl in red

Written by Marie Ulven

Recording courtesy of AWAL Recordings

“prom dress”

Performed by mxmtoon

Produced by Robin Skinner & mxmtoon

Written by Maia M-T

Published by Songtrust Music Publishing

Recording courtesy of mxmtoon LLC under exclusive license to House Arrest/The Orchard

By Arrangement with Bank Robber Music

“Win You Over”

Performed by Whethan & Bearson feat. SOAK

Written by Ethan Snoreck, Jakob Bjørn Hansen, Birdie Monds-Watson, Anthony Whiting and Emily Phillips

Published by Whethan Publishing/These Are Pulse Songs (BMI) c/o Pulse Publishing Administration, Next Wave Music Publishing, Universal - PolyGram Int. Tunes, Inc. on behalf of Universal Music Publishing Ltd., Universal Music Corp. on behalf of itself and PW Arrangements, and Domino Publishing Company USA (ASCAP)

Whethan appears courtesy of Atlantic Recording Corp.

SOAK appears courtesy of Rough Trade Records

Recording courtesy of Ultra Records LLC

FIXES & UPDATES

The Sims 4

Fixed an issue where macOS Simmers could crash when accessing The Gallery.

Fixed an issue where Nice or High Quality harvestables would disappear from Sims’ inventories after Travel or Save/Load.

Fixed an issue where Freelancer Career tasks would not complete after Sims would Travel.

Sims that were seated at a 6 seat round table can now Clean up the dishes.

Child Sims will be now able to enjoy Quick Meals again!

Fixed an issue where Sims didn’t write a genre book when “Write Genre Book” was selected.

Multiple duplicate interactions should no longer appear in pie menus when you have certain objects in your inventory.

The Jet Set Luxury Bath (bathtubJetsGEN_01) was listed as being Unbreakable when that wasn't true.

Speaking of Unbreakable, we fixed an issue with Hot Tubs and Stereos where unbreakable upgrades would not work if these objects were in use when upgrading them.

Fixed an issue in which some Sims could stand on, or walk through solid objects.

Adding a Sim to an existing household via the Create a Sim Stories feature will no longer subtract Simoleons from the household.

You can now extinguish a fire, even if the fire is within another object.

Fixed an issue that would cause Error code 510:5bd7fa0b to occur when attempting to save.

Sims can now Scrap the unfinished paintings of visiting Sims.

Light intensity will no longer reset when setting Auto Lights options.

Fixed an issue which made the item Tiny Globe & Sycee of the Prosperous Moon appear twice in Build Mode.

Half Walls toppers can now be applied to half walls on all levels of your lot.

Fixed an issue that caused Lots downloaded from The Gallery to be placed backwards and not being able to rotate them to an appropriate view.

Households downloaded from The Gallery should now have their starting funds set to the correct amount, and not just the base 20,000 Simoleons.

Child Sims will no longer receive Whims related to workouts.

Fixed an issue that did not allow Nordic keyboards for macOS to use the Size Down Cheat.

Fixed an issue where Error code 102:70c7f9a6 would occur when loading into Lots after loading a saved game.

Walls no longer will disappear when Taking a Photo in a Basement level room that does not have a staircase.

Bookshelves will no longer have the option to purchase University books if you do not own Discover University.

Sims will no longer flicker on and off the landing pad, when in the Rocket Ship using the WooHoo or Try for Baby interactions.

Sims in the Supreme Villain career working on the mischief interaction task can now use the Slablet to Troll teh Forums to complete the task.

Addressed some UI issues in Create a Sim that occurred after modifying the scaling option in the Accessibility options.

Lots and rooms with modded paintings will now be flagged as Custom Content when uploading to The Gallery

Small rugs can no longer be placed over the cutouts created by stairs.

Using Ctrl + U to reset your UI Scaling while you have the UI Scaling window open, will now properly reset the scale bar.

Caterer Sims will now be able to make a Cake and complete their Party event goals.

We attempted to track down the lost harvestables that are currently lost, but found they were lost and unfindable. It’s findings like this that we find we are at a loss of words for, however any future loss should not be found.

Sadly, all the children who had thought they had found the magic loophole, stay seated at the table, are no longer…

...right… like any kid ever stays seated at the table.

Who doesn’t enjoy a good bowl of cereal?

Some example interactions that were reported: “Play Fetch”, ”Give Potion”, “Blackmail”, “Scan Here”. The LastException related to this issue should also be fixed.

It's now truly Unbreakable!

David was also supposed to be Unbreakable… but… spoilers… he broke.

Obviously there was an issue with the hot tub… water is the weakness.

Specifically Baby Bassinets… babies were becoming quite paranoid they weren’t actually Sims...

This could occur if a large object caught fire. You would have to wait until the fire spread outside the bounds of the large object in order to extinguish it.

“Your house is on fire?!”

“Yep… it’s under the bed. Gotta wait it out. But I’m ready.”

Topper… it’s a technical term that means the piece that goes on top of a half wall.

Ok, the issue summary said topper, I couldn’t remember what it was called, so I left it as topper.

Of course I have the game up and running. Yes I could go look…

Ah, you crazy supreme villains and your trolling ways. So eeeeevil.

Get To Work

Aliens should now appear as expected in the Photo thumbnails, and no longer display their disguised forms when they are not in disguise.

Aliens will now display accurate selected options for Eyebrows and Beards in Create A Sim.

Fixed an issue where Scientist Sims would record their findings in Notebooks twice.

We addressed an issue that could prevent Sims from not being able to ring up customers who attempt to purchase from the warming rack.

Some boots, along with the Sims feet, were disappearing when the camera was zoomed all the way out. This should no longer occur.

The "Refer for Surgical Treatment" interaction is now available on surgery tables that have had their color altered with the bb.enablefreebuild cheat.

There are better ways to take tidy and efficient notes.

City Living

There were a number of confusing situations that arose as a result of Invites your Sims would receive. In some cases these would appear as two invites for the same event, one that was the “hey, I just wanted you to know” invite, and the other would be the real invite. They should behave more accordingly to expectations.

Sims with the Shrewd reward trait weren’t as shrewd as they thought they were. We have restored their shrewd’ness and they should now actually receive the money they so rightfully shrewded away at the end of each week.

Fixed an issue in which some shirts in Create A Sim would not tuck in appropriately into skinny jeans.

We blame it on bad investments, the cd market apparently didn’t mean compact discs.

yfTop_EP03Mesh_OmbreBlue now looks as intended when paired with skinny jeans.

Seasons

Sims can now complete New Year resolutions on any lot, and not just their home lots.

The Lottery Holiday is back in your calendars! It should not be a surprise disappearing act any longer.

We spoke to the Holiday Gnomes and they have agreed to stop dropping seed packets if your Sims are not on Lot when the Holiday ends.

Fixed an issue where Weather would affect items inside buildings.

Flower Bunny’s contract has been renewed for them to appear on any Holiday or Tradition that they are scheduled to.

Mandrake and Valerian Root plants are now able to be planted indoors when it is Too Cold if Simmers have Realm of Magic installed.

Holiday Gnomes will no longer break Unbreakable objects when having a negative relationship with them.

The pedestal gnome (pedestal_EF18GENgnome) will no longer spawn as part of the Harvestfest gnomes tradition.

They wanted to spread holiday cheer… or they were attempting to bring about the end of Simanity, and usher in a new world order. Tomayto, tomahto.

Bunny contractual negotiations are ridiculous… they just keep multiplying their demands.

Dad joke quota met.

We don’t know what was done to make them angry, but even as magical as they are, they should not be breaking the Unbreakable.

He’s a table, he knows he’s a table, he doesn’t have any illusions to the contrary.

Get Famous

Married Celebrity Sim Couples will no longer React in Disgust with each other then they enter the same room.

Household members will no longer react to members with Pristine Reputation every time they travel together.

Fixed an issue that caused Recording a Product Review to fail if the Sim had previously interrupted a review by traveling to another Lot.

The Well Suited and G.R.A.N. talent agencies are back in business! Gigs from these agencies will now display appropriately.

Super Speed 3 should now work when Sims sleep in their Sleeping Pods and have a pet.

They are just a B-list celebrity though, can you blame them?

Like... we get it, they are perfect… no need to rub it in.

Island Living

Fixed an issue where Odd Jobs tasks were not able to be completed.

Fixed an issue where Conch Shells were not able to be put in Sims’ Inventories.

Sims can now see their recorded findings in the Notification Wall when performing “Examine Water Thoughtfully” on the Fishing Board.

Released Fish will actually be released back into the water and not be stored in Sims’ Inventory.

Players using low graphics settings will be surprised to find that Dolphins do actually exist in the waters of Sulani.

Discover University

Sims will no longer be accused of cheating on their coursework or homework if they don’t actually cheat.

Term Presentations should not have missing interactions any longer.

Fixed an issue that caused Error code 104:5ee05594 to occur when loading into a Dorm where an NPC had a Baby.

We addressed some feedback that getting As was too easy. Please be aware that your Sim will have to complete the coursework in order to consistently get good grades.

Students will no longer autonomously taunt each other about University Superiority unless they're at the Game Day organization event or have one of these traits: Childish, Evil, Hot-Headed, and Bro.

Please be aware that a Sim’s hunger, energy, and bladder motives will no longer refill on their own just before class.

Fixed an issue in which Enhancing Utility Bots would get cancelled inappropriately.

Roommates should no longer Bring Food home every time they return.

Sims can now Turn Off Computer Glasses when moving to other neighborhoods.

Sims that complete the debate showdown, will once again be able to change into their other outfits.

Term Papers will now always count toward the course’s final grades.

Fixed an issue where the following Build Mode items were not able to be placed on the LearnWell Desk (desk2x1_EP08DORM_set1):

Fixed an issue where “The Secret Society Masks” were not being unlocked in Create A Sim.

The showerWall_EP08Gen_set1 shower will no longer turn on when a Sim attempts to repair it.

Fixed an issue with a swatch color for the yfBody_EP08DressOveralls_BlackSolidWhite

Active Sims should no longer get the “Not Enough Exercise” tense buff if they have enrolled in the Soccer Fútbol after school activity, or choose to juggle a soccer fútbol ball.

Sims now must meet all of the promotion requirements in order to be promoted in the Education Career.

Attempting to interact with a bike rider should no longer cause your Sim to route fail when performing the interaction.

The Make Offering to Sprites interaction should no longer be unavailable if you only have harvestables in your inventory.

Reaching level 5 of the Law Career now correctly unlocks the lawyer suits for your Sim in Create a Sim.

Bots enhanced to level 3 will no longer automatically enhance to level 4 upon activation.

Interacting with a Sim riding a bike will no longer cause the Sim, your Sim, the bike, parts of the world, or any other potential object or thing to disappear.

Inviting your professor to hangout will now actually have the professor arrive to hangout.

Servo can now complete the StrangerVille story.

Servo Fun and Social motive descriptions no longer incorrectly refer to Servo as a Sim.

Bicycles can now be searched for in Build Mode by using the term “bike”.

ExoMech suit can be worn by teen Sims, and is visible too.

Sims already wearing a helmet, will no longer change into another helmet to ride a bike.

Sims in the same household will now automatically know the others degree program.

Sims will no longer receive multiple signing bonuses from degree relevant careers. Only one signing bonus is awarded in any seven day period.

Woohoo in Shower will no longer give fame.

“Chat About Scandalous Lawsuit” now provides fun.

Choosing to cancel the Practice Presentation interaction will now cancel the interaction.

Servos can no longer get sick.

Servos can no longer purchase the Seldom Sleepy reward trait.

Sims on probation can now be asked to study with.

Sims should no longer route fail when attempting to take a Pregnancy test in a bathroom stall.

Asking the Repo Person to not take your stuff will now provide you a Text Notification as to whether or not you had an impact on the Repo Person’s decision.

Sprites no longer appear around the Sim after the buff expires after leaving the Secret Society.

Starving students… yes, it’s a trope, but let’s not lean into it so heavily.

It was getting a bit awkward in special occasions and when meeting neighbors. Not to mention it is a fashion… choice, yes… let’s just say that.

Dang it.

Lex Light By Dex Pix - lightTableLarge_EP08GENarm_set1, Q-Bik Tabletop Mood Light - lightTableLarge_EP08GENcage, and Great Gramps’ Light - lightTableLarge_EP08GEN_set1 can now be placed properly.

yuAcc_GlassesEP08SecretSocietyMask and yuAcc_GlassesEP08MasqueradeMask are now unlocking as intended.

Outdoor Retreat

Sims can now roast at a campfire without needing a seating object nearby.

Spa Day

Fixed an issue where Sims did not have the option to “Take Bath with Soaks” and “Take Mud Bath” on Showertubs.

Sims can now again get massages autonomously at Spas.

Mud bath… showertub, at home? Hmm. Goooood plumbing.

Pamper Mode: On!

Dine Out

NPC Sims will now eat more at Restaurants.

Photos taken of Experimental Foods will now display correctly when put into frames.

Fixed a swatch color error with the ymTop_GP03Blazer_SolidWhiteBlack

Profit!

Vampires

“Influence Emotions” interaction will no longer be available to Vampires that have not yet unlocked this perk.

Jungle Adventure

Several objects were not properly being found when using color filters. These should be filterable now.

StrangerVille

StrangerVille music has been added to the Lin-Z Smart Speaker.

Realm of Magic

Fixed an issue where Occult eyes would not properly apply to Spellcasters.

Unplayed NPCs not living in Glimmerbrook will no longer appear in Glimmerbrook performing Magic.

“Challenge to Magic Duel at Dueling Grounds” performed by a broom and non-broom using duelist will now take place at the dueling grounds.

Spellcasters with the “Knowledge is Magic” Perk will now be able to complete the “Finish Reading 3 Books” aspiration goal.

Fixed an issue where some Spellcasters would not complete the “Learn a Spell” goal, even though they would learn a Spell.

Spellcasters will now be able to Do Laundry while having “Always Transportalate” enabled.

Fixed an issue in which Pet Familiars would not stop foraging, never bringing back their findings.

Sages now can be chosen to Play With for a game of Chess.

Random non Spellcaster Sims no longer will show up as being Sages.

Fixed an issue in which Cauldron made food was not able to be eaten as leftovers when looking at the refrigerator.

Sims on cursed lots will no longer always catch fire in all attempts while using the Fireplace or the Stove.

Fixed an issue in which sounds from The Magic Realm could be heard in Del Sol Valley if you had Get Famous installed.

Fixed an issue in which some shirts in Create A Sim would not tuck in appropriately.

Spellcaster Sims can now clean potty messes, child messes, and kitty litter messes by casting Scruberoo.

Spellcasters will no longer have duplicate makeup options in CAS.

Spellcasters should no longer land in unroutable locations when using the “Always Use Brooms” spell.

Fixed an issue with asset yfAcc_WristRightGP08Gems in Create A Sim that made it display incorrectly when Sims were styled with long sleeve shirts.

Spellcasters that cast Mischief Spells will now get awarded Mischief Skill when doing so.

Male spellcasters will no longer have a chance of going bald after performing Rite of Dissolution.

yfHair_GP08Braids now properly appears within the Afro-Textured texture filter.

Mischief spells are now counted towards the Criminal Career daily task Mischief Interaction.

Spellcasters with the Spellcraft and Sorcery aspiration will no longer reset or cause a LastException after writing songs.

What’s next Bob Pancakes is a vampire?

He is? I knew it!

They are now all good Familiars and bring everything they find back.

We also fixed an issue where they would only bring Brooms back after foraging, they are still all good familiars.

They cheat… I can’t be that bad.

Impostors have been dealt with. Thank you for your cooperation.

That’s probably who I was playing chess against.

Thankfully so! Not sure what we were going to do with all that food.

Try the Mac and Cheese, 10/10 totally recommend.

Looks at SimGuruMorgan with an Evil Grin.

yfTop_GP08ShirtLace, yfTop_GP08BlouseSeeThrough, and yfTop_GP08BodysuitVinyl now look as intended when paired with skinny jeans.

Magic… it’s magic.

I understand buying duplicates of favourite make up items, but this was excessive.

Excellent… Evil Laugh

Perfect Patio

We fixed an issue where hired Maids would often change into Swimwear and use the Hot Tub instead of completing their tasks.

I hired them to clean… honest!

Romantic Garden

Sims in the Freelance careers, including freelance photography, will no longer be able to Wish for Promotion using the Wishing Well.

Sims in Conservationist, Educator, Actor, Style Influencer, Military, Critic, Social Media, or Politician careers will now be able to Wish for a Promotion using the Wishing Well.

Sims are their own boss, so it didn’t make sense for them to do that.

Backyard

Fixed an issue in which some shirts in Create A Sim would not tuck in appropriately into skinny jeans.

yfTop_SP08BodysuitLace now looks as intended when paired with skinny jeans.

Vintage Glamour

Addressed several issues that caused the butler to fail to perform their assigned tasks.

Fixed an issue that prevented Butlers to help put Toddler Sims to Bed.

The Butler should no longer make food for themselves when they are not hungry.

Moschino

Emotional auras in photographs can now be toggled on/off.

Fixed an issue where some photos taken were a bit blurry when placed in frames in Live Mode.

Tripods placed on floors other than 1, 2, or 3, should no longer cause the camera to change floors when attempting to take a photo.

Ask to Pose interaction should no longer fail if the Sim attempts to run the interaction from the Open Street.

Sent all of our cameras to maintenance for repairs, enjoy!

#s4cc #s4mm #ts4cc #ts4mm #maxis match #thesims4 #s4 patch notes

117 notes · View notes

imaginetonyandbucky · 4 years

Text

Dead Man’s Eyes: Ch. 4

Link to AO3, by @dracusfyre

“Sir, Mr. Barnes is at the door.”

Tony’s fingers tightened on his soldering gun before he forced himself to relax. “Let him in,” he said, trying to remain focused on the circuit board he’d been repairing.

“Hey, what’s with the new security?” Bucky asked as he came in with a sandwich in each hand and a bag of potato chips under his arm. “It’s been extra tight around the lab for over a week now. New project for SHIELD?”

“Maybe I’m working on something for you,” Tony lied with a smile as he set the soldering iron aside and took one of the sandwiches.

But when Bucky sat down with the other sandwich, he wasn’t smiling. “Are you?”

Tony held his smile with difficulty. “I can’t tell you, it’s a surprise.”

“I don’t believe you,” Bucky said bluntly. “When you are working on something for one of us, you can’t wait to talk about it, if not with me then with someone else. But lately you’ve been closed off and quiet.Too quiet. So what’s really going on?”

“Nothing,” Tony insisted, taking a bite of the BLT.

Bucky took a deep breath and then exhaled slowly, visibly trying not to lose his temper. “Ok, well then could you take some time from “nothing” for us to have dinner or something? I feel like I’ve barely seen you lately.”

Tony looked down at his sandwich, scared of what Bucky would see in his eyes. It had grown so hard to be with Bucky and not analyze everything he was saying and everything he wasn’t, to keep his questions behind his teeth. If it really was Bucky, he could lose Bucky’s trust forever; if it wasn’t, revealing his suspicions would prevent him from ever learning what Hydra was after. Easier to pretend to be busy, even if it made him miss Bucky terribly. “Sure, he said, he said after a pause that was probably a few seconds too long. “Tomorrow night?”

When there was no answer, he glanced up to see Bucky looking at him. Bucky put the sandwich down and put his hands in his lap, like he was bracing himself. “Is it me? Something I did?” When Tony just stared, speechless, Bucky continued, the words spilling from him in a rush, “Look, I know I’ve been...I don’t know, I’ve been feeling really forgetful lately, and sometimes it feels like - like I’m missing something, like there’s a blank spot where a memory should be. Things are coming back faster than they did, you know, last time, so I didn’t want to say anything, I just wanted to pretend that everything was okay but if I’ve fucked up somehow- like a- a birthday or an anniversary or something - please, just tell me, so I can fix it.” This time, when Bucky met his eyes he looked so lost that Tony couldn’t stand it.

“It’s not you, it’s me, Bucky, I swear,” he said. He came around his work station and sat on Bucky’s lap, cupping his face in his hands. “I’ve been trying to work through some shit and - and it’s spilling, spilling out on you and I’m sorry. Please, just give me more time, okay?” He kissed Bucky’s temple, then his cheekbone, and when Bucky tilted his head up, let himself be dragged into a long, drugging kiss that started making him very aware that he was, in fact, sitting on Bucky’s lap, especially when Bucky’s hand slid up the back of his shirt, hands warm and rough as they stroked his back. He forced himself to gentle the kiss and pulled back to rest his forehead on Bucky’s. Doing anything else would have been the worst sort of lie.

“Okay,” Bucky said after a moment. “If you need some time, I’ll wait.” He kissed Tony one more time before setting him on his feet. As he grabbed his sandwich and left, Tony stared at the scarred wood of his work station, trying to swallow back the hot press of tears; Bucky was being sweet and understanding and patient, but all Tony could think was, of course he would be-if he got mad and picked a fight, he wouldn’t have access to me or the lab anymore.

“Sir, you asked me to notify you if there was an unusual change in James Barnes’ pattern of behavior,” JARVIS said one morning as Tony was savoring his first cup of coffee and reviewing his emails. Tony felt his heart skip a beat then start racing as dread curdled in his stomach. He put his coffee mug down when he realized that his hands were shaking.

“Go on,” he said, clearing his throat.

A graph of Bucky's cell phone activity flashed onto Tony’s computer screen. A few days ago, it's activity had declined noticeably; it was still being used, but not nearly as much as it had been before. Tony chewed on his thumb, trying to think about what had happened over the past few days, but the only thing he could think was that Bucky had just realized his phone was being monitored. “JARVIS, do a sweep; are there any unknown cell phone signals active on the compound?” If he wasn't using this phone, he was probably using a different one. Though the Avengers had distanced themselves from SHIELD's intelligence collection activities, between Natasha, Clint, and a couple of others, there were a handful of burner phones on the premises at any given time. JARVIS regularly logged them into its system as it periodically swept the compound for unauthorized video or listening devices and would know if a new one had appeared.

“No, sir,” JARVIS after a moment. Tony sighed and sat back in his chair. It was a long shot anyway; JARVIS wouldn’t pick it up if the battery and sim card had been removed, which was Spycraft 101 according to Natasha. Tony scrubbed his face with his hands and closed out of the screen; he would search their rooms later for a burner phone, though he doubted he would be able to find something that Bucky wanted to remain hidden.

“Tony, we need to talk.”

Tony’s insides turned to ice as Bucky sat down on the coffee table in front of him. Tony sat up slowly and set his tablet aside as he stalled for time. “About what?” he said, proud of how level his voice was. He tried to meet Bucky’s eyes but they kept sliding away to look at a spot over his shoulder.

“About why you are spying on me.” Tony tried to think of something to say but he couldn’t force out a denial; he knew he wouldn’t be able to sell it, not when Bucky was watching him so closely. Bucky raised his eyebrows as the silence stretched. “Right. Okay then.” He hung his head for a moment, then ran a hand through his hair. “I was hoping you would deny it and say that I was imagining things, but you can’t, can you? What is it, Tony? What have I done to make me think you can’t trust me?” Tony wanted to say something but he stayed mute, miserable and scared and guilty and defensive; if he opened his mouth he wasn’t sure what would come out. “Do - do you think I’ve cheated on you? Is that it? Because I swear, that week I was gone I never-”

Tony jerked his head to the side, an instinctive motion of denial that he couldn’t stop in time. Infidelity would be a good cover, but it was too late; Bucky’s searching eyes had seen the motion and knew it for what it was.

“Then…” Bucky glanced away and in that moment he looked as scared as Tony felt. “If you’re not worried about me personally then it must be professionally. Which means - it means…” Bucky let out an explosive breath and stood, pacing away, apparently unable to put into words. He got to the far wall of the living room and turned on his heel, giving Tony a narrow-eyed look. “Wait, is this - is this what Natasha said to you a few weeks ago?” he said, jabbing his finger at Tony. “That made you so angry?” Tony couldn’t look at him; he wrapped his arms around himself and hunched his shoulders defensively. “I should have known,” Bucky growled, resuming his pacing. “The idea that I am a double agent is something straight out of her post-Cold War, Red Room playbook. When did she say it happened? During that week I was gone? Does she think Hydra got their hands on me and reprogrammed me as a honeypot?”

“Not reprogrammed,” Tony said quietly. “Never deprogrammed. Not since you were first taken.”

“Never-” Bucky stopped pacing in front of Tony, confused. “You mean like, the words didn’t work when you said them?”

“Yes.”

“Why would you think that? I saved your life! Those Hydra agents were going to kill you!”

“You put a gun in my face and then you left me there!” Tony burst out, surprising himself. “You could have said what you were doing! You could have told me anything, but you left, and you were gone for a week and I didn’t know if you were alive or dead!”

Bucky took a step back, stunned. “There was no time,” he said. “I told you that. There were more coming, and I had to lead them away from you.”

“Yeah, that is what you told me. But I never heard another person until Steve dug me out of the rubble.” Tony didn’t realize how angry he was until he started talking, but now he was shaking with it. “I said the words, but how was I supposed to know that it worked when I woke up and saw you standing over me like that? How can I know now? If Hydra can tell you to do anything, to be anything, how can I trust you?”

Bucky sat down heavily, like his legs couldn’t support him anymore, and curled around himself like he’d been punched in the stomach. “What would it take, then? What would it take to prove that I’m not working for Hydra?”

“I don’t know,” Tony said quietly. “I’ve been trying to figure out something but I’ve got nothing, no answers, no ideas.” They sat in silence for a long time, as Bucky ran through all the scenarios that Tony had been struggling with for weeks. How do you build trust when nothing Bucky said or did could be trusted? When you couldn’t even trust yourself to tell truth from a lie? There was no date on the calendar, no finish line, no way to say "if he hasn't done it by now, he never will"; Stane had hidden his agenda for decades before he showed his true face.

“We start over,” Bucky said finally. He glanced up and met Tony’s gaze, eyes bleak but jaw firm. “The problem is that you don’t know if the trigger words worked when you said them, so we do it again. Push the reset button, as you like to say.”

Tony’s jaw dropped. “What? No,” he said, shaking his head. “That’s crazy. I mean, everything is crazy, I know. The idea that you are some kind of deep mole for Hydra is…” Tony blew out a breath. “Crazy. Right?”

“Tony, our lives are generally fucking crazy, ok? I know I’m me, but...I’ve shot you, stabbed you, and even when I was me, I had to pretend like I wasn’t. You’ve been betrayed before, so I get it. If it was anyone else but me and you, I would be telling you to do whatever it took to keep yourself safe.” He reached out like he was going to touch Tony but he stopped as if unsure his touch would be welcome. “But I think that would mean being separated from you for who knows how long, and I don’t want to lose you. So I’ll do whatever it takes to keep you, okay? I mean, I remembered you once, right? I know I’ll do it again, I could never forget you for long.”

Tony tried to imagine sitting Bucky down in a chair and saying the words, watching as Bucky disappeared into the Winter Soldier with no way of knowing when he would come back. The image was so repulsive that he thought he was going to throw up, like it was a poison he could eject from his body. “No fucking way.”

“Then what? I can’t keep living like this, Tony; I want things to be like they were before. I miss you. I miss us. ”

The raw ache in Bucky’s voice made Tony’s chest hurt. He studied Bucky's bent head, suddenly feeling calmer. The answer, he realized, is that you have to decide to trust. It was a terrifying leap of faith, knowing that you could be hurt again, but the alternative - losing what he and Bucky had made together, losing Bucky himself - was worse. He took Bucky’s hands and brought them up to his face, kissing the palms and pressing his cheek against them, one cold and one warm. “I’m done with this insanity. I let it get way out of hand, okay? I’m sorry, I’m so fucking sorry. I should never have let Natasha’s paranoia get to me.”

“No, Tony, it’s - shhh,” Bucky said helplessly when he felt wetness on his hands. “Come on, stop, if you cry I’m gonna, and I can’t do that cuz I’m a hundred years old and an infamous assassin.” That surprised a wet laugh out of Tony, which made Bucky smile softly. “We’re going to be okay, I promise.” Tony let Bucky pull him in close and he dried his face on Bucky’s shirt, feeling more at peace than he had since this whole mess began.

-------

The next day, Tony deleted all the surveillance records and lifted all the security restrictions on Bucky he’d put in place over the last few weeks. Natasha came in while he was cleaning house, looking over his shoulder with interest.

“James Buchanan Barnes: Unrestricted access,” she read from his computer screen. “Interesting choice of security tactics. 'Suspected traitor? Come on in!'”

“It’s over, Natasha,” Tony said firmly. “I don’t know how I managed to forget this for so long, but I trust Bucky with my life, my tech, everything. I’m done second-guessing him.”

“Oh?” Natasha raised her eyebrows with interest and jumped up to sit on the table, crossing her legs at the ankles and swinging them. “Sounds like something big happened.”

“He offered to let me wipe his brain so that I could trust him again,” Tony said. Christ that was still hard to say. He shook his head to dispel the image. “I still can’t believe I let it get that far that he would offer to do that.”

“Unless he was sure you wouldn’t do it.” When Tony looked at her incredulously she said, “You’re a good person, Tony. It’s not that big of a gamble to think that you wouldn’t do something like that.”

Tony stared at her, unblinking, because that thought hadn’t even occurred to him. “Christ. Jesus fucking Christ.” And just like that, the nightmare started over again. Tony leaned against the wall, and when that wasn’t enough, he slid to the floor and buried his face in his hands. “Fuck.” The room was silent for a moment, then he finally said, “I give up. I don't even fucking know anymore. What would you do?”

“Well, the smart play is to detain him and start counter-programming protocols,” Natasha said, coming over to sit next to him. "Or cut him loose, he can't betray you if you've already cut ties." When Tony shot her a Look she held her hands up. Don’t shoot the messenger. “But before you do anything, you’re going to have to convince to Steve or you’ll have a war on your hands,” she pointed out. “Have you mentioned any of this to him?”

“Hell no,” Tony said. “We’re still not on good terms after that fight we had before Bucky came back. I can just imagine what he would say to all of this.”

“True. But you need to do something soon, before something happens to make the decision for you.” When Tony exhaled heavily, she leaned against him and rested her head on his shoulder. “We’ll figure this out, Tony. Where’s Bucky now?”

“In our rooms. Watching TV, I guess.” Tony let his head fall back against the door, eyes red-rimmed. “I just want all of this to be over.”

“I know, Tony.” She put a hand on his bicep and squeezed. “Me too.”

-------

Later on that day, Tony was trying to distract himself by reviewing the blueprints and construction bids on a new Stark Industries facility when JARVIS made a soft alert tone and said, “Sir, there is a visitor at the main entrance.”

“This time of night?” Tony glanced at the clock; it was after 2 am. With a grimace, he realized he’d been working non-stop for almost fourteen hours. It didn’t happen often, but sometimes they got teenagers that would run up to the gates, ring the buzzer, and then run away, as if they could “ding-dong-dash” the Avengers compound without being caught on ten different security cameras. Tony dismissed the blueprints he was working on and rubbed his eyes tiredly. “Pull it up on my screen.” He was still shuffling papers when the image on the screen caught his eye, then he did a double take. “What the fuck?” Tony breathed as he started at his screen. “Zoom in.”

“Hey!” The Natasha on the security cam shouted, voice tinny, waving at the camera with one hand while pressing a bandage against her side with the other. She looked like she’d been dragged through hell backwards, clothes ripped and bloody, lip split and swollen. “I’ve had a hell of a month and I lost my keys, can you let me in?”

#tony stark #bucky barnes #Tony x bucky #winteriron #prompt fill #dracusfyre

64 notes · View notes

badlydrawndrawnings · 4 years

Text

Takuto Maruki’s Cursed Timeline

[NOTE: Everything in this post is mostly comprised of juicedup14′s Fan Translations, because they are honestly the most reliable ones I have access to. If anyone wants to kindly make a rebuttal regarding events on the timeline or correct events on the time/other corrections not related to the timeline, feel free to do so].

Looking back at the Original Vanilla Persona 5, and comparing it to Royal story wise, something tells me that Atlus creating Takuto Maruki into existence sort of accidentally muck up the timeline. It’s not help by the fact Atlus is still refusing to accept 2016 as the year Persona 5 takes place and use 201X despite calendars lining up.

Because we don’t have a Birthday OR Birth Year, for the purpose of this post, Takuto is a Pisces born between Feb 20, 1988 (because Futaba’s BD is Feb 19) and March 20, 1988 (Excluding March 3 because that is Yuka Ayase from Persona 1′s BD). 1988 makes Takuto 28 in 2016, and 29 when Royal ends. I don’t think Atlus wants him young as 21 or 22, but I don’t think Atlus wants him older than 30, and details of his past makes me think he isn’t 23, 24 or 25. Also for purpose of this post, P5 will be given the year 2016, because 201X is actually going to be mention several times and I don’t want confusion in the timeline.

In regards to the timeline, we must talk about the first elephant, Wakaba Isshiki and her involvement in cognitive (p)science.

Original Vanilla Persona 5 shows that Wakaba is in the field of cognitive (p)science research, and her research has ties to the government. Wakaba’s involvement within the cognitive (p)science field made her super important (seemingly almost leading pioneer important) to where Shido thought that to steal Wakaba’s research (after she refused to turn it to him), he needed to order a hit on her. All of this is the same in Royal. No retcons at all.

With the addition of Takuto’s character who is involve in the same field, you think someone could have named dropped a connection, right? Wrong! There is no connection (that I can find) linking Wakaba and Takuto, and Takuto when meets Futaba and seeing Wakaba’s research, he seems to have no idea who Wakaba is at all.

In fact, all of Takuto’s past (which will be discussed under the cut) gives implication cognition (p)science research is new. Not new-new, but new enough that people are still apparently trying to be the first to make a real name for themselves in the field independently(as much as it can) from the government, and Takuto was a top contender on the list. An explanation for the first elephant is simple: Wakaba got into the field of cognitive (p)science when it was new-new and was able to snag government connections. Takuto meanwhile, got into cognitive (p)science when people were trying make a real name for themselves independently while in university and stuck with uni for a good while.

So far, so good. Elephant two and all the heavy major spoilers is under the cut.

Elephant Two of the cursed timeline is the breakup with Rumi and when Takuto lost his future lab because his research wasn’t ‘valid’ enough, as the two events happen in close succession with one another. Rumi was Takuto’s college/uni girlfriend (the wording makes me think they started dating during uni and stay together ever since; they’re college-uni sweethearts). Based off the the diaries entries, Takuto and Rumi were still engaged to one another between 2/2 of 201X and 4/9 of 201X. 2/2 entry states that 2/3 (aka, ‘tomorrow’) is also Rumi’s Birthday. 4/9 entry is written in the Spring, with Rumi in the hospital shock and traumatize over the lost of her parents and Takuto trying to still wrap his own trauma and shock over Rumi’s parents death and Rumi herself.

By the time of Takuto’s conversation with Rumi at the hospital -clearly happening in late spring given Takuto’s third diary entry is in early summer, and because polo shirt are worn in warm temperature of spring and summer- Takuto finished his first thesis, aka the research pre-cognition overwrite (aka, Takuto’s power). In this same conversation, Takuto awakens his Persona abilities in the real world (it’s not a full awakening tho), but seems to not use it again after Rumi.

At least not until Takuto lost his future lab.

Based off the second flashback with Takuto and Shibusawa (aka, Takuto’s friend; juicedup14 translated the friend’s name), Takuto’s research came to a complete halt, and the future lab Takuto is planning on having is also halted as well. In the previous flashback with Rumi, Takuto mentions someone took an interest. By 6/3 entry, Takuto is now rewriting his thesis and doing his second round of research. With this rewrite and powers, Takuto seems to realize ‘oh shit cognitive (p)science is dangerous better make sure it doesn’t cause harm’.

By the flashback with Yoshizawa meeting Takuto in 2016 (aka, before the start of the game) the man has that Shaggy’s style beard, meaning enough time past after everything in 201X, as well with the fact Takuto had enough time to establish a practice because realistically, Yoshizawa’s parents must have gotten Takuto’s name as a referral or pick from a list of professional for their daughter to at least see. To keep Takuto’s past stay as close as possible to P5/Royal (since Rumi still stings a sore spot in Takuto’s heart even in 2016), Takuto’s worst year has to happen in 2014. And with 2014 in mind, timeline isn’t cursed when looking at it as a whole.

(Pre) 2/2, 2014: Possibly 25 or 26 year old Takuto has terrible headaches like Rita Repulsa, and Takuto pops the question to Rumi. Rumi says yes.

2/2, 2014: 26 year old Takuto writes in his diary about meeting Rumi’s parents (on her birthday). Headaches are still terrible.

Possibly 2/3, 2014: Rumi’s Birthday, and Takuto meets Rumi’s parents. There’s a chance the burglary happens on Rumi’s birthday, so for the purpose of this post, let’s assume it’s the case. Rumi loses her parents and lands in the hospital due to the shock of the trauma.

4/9, 2014: Another diary entry. 27 year old Takuto’s headaches get worse, as well has the pain in his heart due to the condition of Rumi.

Post 4/9, 2014 (Probably April): Takuto gains powers of cognition overwrite; he heals Rumi at the cost of retconning himself out of Rumi’s life.

Post 4/9 2014 (Probably late April or most likely May; see Elephant Three and Four): Takuto’s research and future lab are stopped. Takuto gets drunk over it with Shibusawa. This is one of two periods where someone *coughshidocough* stole Takuto’s original research.

6/3, 2014: Takuto is still early on in round two of his research. This is the second of two periods where someone*coughshidocough* stole Takuto’s original research

Post 6/3, 2014 but Pre-March 2016: 26 or 27 year old Takuto decides to stop being a research and decides becomes a therapist/counselor after talking to Shibusawa.

Pre-March 2016: 26 or 27 year old Takuto is now a therapist with a practice

March 2016: 27 or 28 year old Takuto see Yoshizawa and creates Ka-sumire (yeah he just changed Sumire’s cognition of herself and it’s not a fusion of the two, but technically it is in a sense?)

12/24, 2016: Should Joker max Takuto’s Co-op/Confidant, Takuto finishes his second research paper/thesis, shows it to his his old professor, and says his suspicion who stole the original research, and awakens his Persona when reality and Mementos fuse together thanks to Yaldy. Takuto becomes God (like). If we take Takuto’s word, Goro is dead and brings him back to life

1/1, 2017: Third Semester officially start.

So far, still good. And now we get to the Elephant Three, Four, and Five: Masayoshi Shido, Goro Akechi, and Wakaba Isshiki’s death. That’s right; Wakaba is back at it again, though it’s not her fault. All three are connection to one another so they’re all in a little heard of elephants. We ought to blame Shido deciding to order a hit on Wakaba with his supernatural hitman but not trying to kill Takuto when getting a chance.

On 12/24, Takuto is convince it’s Shido who stole the original research all those years ago (with Takuto mistaken that his research was used for psychotic breakdowns, this help narrow the timeline) -which I do think it's legit given the professor response and Shido canonically stole Wakaba’s research- resulting in Takuto to start over from scratch. It’s odd to think Shido allow Takuto to live when Shido has a supernatural hitman at his beck in call...right? To re-summarize a post I don’t want to link because I’m only going to be taking about 2014, Goro Akechi’s Timeline of 2014 is this:

2014, between Goro’s last year of middle school and the beginning of his first year of high school, 15 year old Goro (he won’t be 16 until June 2) awakens to his Persona and Powers. There are no serious rampages (aka psychotic breakdowns) and obviously no mental shutdowns. Goro experiment with generic shadows in the Metaverse to understand WTF is going on with him.

2014, May in Goro’s 1st year. Goro decides to show himself to Shido and his powers (Goro clearly didn’t show up as a train hitman; just someone who knows he has powers to make life go swimmingly well). As Goro and Shido knew each other for 2.5 years, the midpoint for a year anniversary in May is November, which fits the long ass exposition scene. The psychotic breakdown we know in P5 also get there start here.

2014, August in Goro’s 1st year. Wakaba dies in her car accident. As Goro’s BD is in June, and given what Shadow!Shido says to the PT, Shido introduced the idea of mental shutdown to Goro post June, and Shadow!Wakaba is most likely sixteen year old Goro’s first human Shadow he had to kill.

Given Takuto’s personal timeline, while we don’t have the exact dates for when the lab and future research was canned and when Shido stole Takuto’s original research, the only ball park estimate is Late April or May, with May best corresponding to Goro’s starting his plan of revenge and deciding to work for Shido. The idea of a 15 year old somehow having access to a university, stealing a grown’s man thesis paper without getting caught, and giving it to Shido as well as bringing up supernatural powers in rapid succession is humorous, but obviously wrong.

The idea Takuto’s first research thesis was stolen right before Goro approached Shido is the only placement that makes sense. We have Takuto who is basically on the fine line of being a nobody and somebody. Takuto was gonna join the big leagues. We have Shido who has his goals of taking over Japan, as well as the drive. Shido is still a regular corrupt politician, and has no way of say, killing someone by special means and get away with it at of this moment.

Canonically, Shido’s interested in cognitive (p)science boils down to ‘I can use this for my goal of becoming prime minister’. Given his role in the government, he must had heard Wakaba’s name and research, but had no real means on talking to her about it since Shido apparently only spoken to Wakaba once or twice to get her to hand over the cognitive (p)science research. The closest he can get to Wakaba’s research is this coffee driven twenty-something year old who looks like he never seen a comb or brush in his life (I doubt Takuto is this, but Shido probably think so) thesis paper that Shido takes a shine to it. A really good shine. Like, ‘Hm...I’m gonna take it and hope there’s physical proof to it in the future and ruin this man’s whole career while I’m at it’ shine.

Just has Shido read a few paragraphs, Goro shows up and offers his powers. Even though Shido hasn’t read the full paper, Goro is the physical proof that somehow support Takuto’s paper. Shido being Shido, still wants Wakaba’s research because it’s been in the making for much longer than Takuto’s. With new knowledge how the other world works due to Goro causing rampages of psychotic breakdowns, Shido throw aside Takuto’s research and order the hit he couldn’t do on Takuto onto Wakaba. And you think that Shido would have taken another chance at Takuto with Goro, but he didn’t.

Why? Takuto is no longer in the field of cognitive (p)science by this point because now he’s either a therapist/counselor or on the path of being a therapist/counselor. With a ruin research career and having to switch job, Shido probably did the right move from his POV to not add Takuto as another needed casualty. Because Shido in a sense, spared Takuto’s life a second time around, it also answers a question I found in Third Semester:

If Shido stole Takuto’s research, why does Goro have no idea who Takuto is when they properly met in Third Semester (remember: Goro has a question mark symbol when Takuto is reveal to be the Palace Owner, meaning Goro is confuse that this random guy is something Joker and Ka-sumire know, and Goro has to research Takuto’s past to explain to Joker)? And the answer is Goro truly has no idea who Takuto Maruki is! By the time Goro introduced himself to Shido, Shido found the man irrelevant and no longer important to bring up to his supernatural hitman as a target because Shido can get the true diamond in his eyes: Wakaba Isshiki’s research.

This would also put Takuto’s assumption of the psychotic breakdowns and how Shido introduced mental shutdowns to Goro into a new light. Psychotic Breakdowns is canonically Loki’s special power Goro can us on others to make them go wild and destructive and go on rampages. Mental Shutdown is pretty much killing the Shadow and seeing whatever will happen next. The two are not the same thing, despite what the original Vanilla Localization says by lumping the two together; it’s a mistake on the localization part. In fact, I’m a bit convince there’s a chance Takuto fell into the same mistake as well...

#takuto maruki #goro akechi #masayoshi shido #wakaba isshiki #p5r spoilers #persona 5 royal spoilers #persona 5 the royal spoilers #persona 5 royal #persona 5 the royal #major spoilers #endgame spoilers #this is a text post #timeline

20 notes · View notes

thesims4blogger · 4 years

Text

The Sims 4: New Game Patch (December 12th, 2019)

There’s a new Sims 4 PC update available via Origin.

Remove all MODS and Custom Content before updating your game

Update 12/12/2019 PC: 1.59.73.1020 / Mac: 1.59.73.1220

Hello Simmers!

Today’s update has been influenced by you as well… We set aside time to specifically address issues that you’ve let us know are important to your in-game experience, and we hope the long list of fixes and improvements you’ll find below will lead to many hours of fun playing The Sims 4. In addition, we’ve squeezed in a few un-planned extras we hope you’ll enjoy. Not only have we added some new music tracks to the game, but we’ve also converted a number of hairstyles to now also be available for children and toddlers. While the adult versions of these styles will remain exclusive to whichever pack they originally came from, we hope you’ll all enjoy these additional options for your Sim’s little ones.

While Maxis will soon be taking a short break to enjoy the holidays (merry Winterfest, and a Happy New Year!), we’ll be back for another packed year for The Sims 4 in 2020. See you then!

-SimGuruGraham, ft. SimGuruGnome

The Music The following music has been added to the alternative station:

“Nicknames” Performed by Dayglow Written by Sloan Struble Copyright Control Recording courtesy of AWAL Digital Ltd.

“4am” Performed by girl in red Written by Marie Ulven Copyright Control Recording courtesy of AWAL Recordings

“prom dress” Performed by mxmtoon Produced by Robin Skinner & mxmtoon Written by Maia M-T Published by Songtrust Music Publishing Recording courtesy of mxmtoon LLC under exclusive license to House Arrest/The Orchard By Arrangement with Bank Robber Music

“Win You Over” Performed by Whethan & Bearson feat. SOAK Written by Ethan Snoreck, Jakob Bjørn Hansen, Birdie Monds-Watson, Anthony Whiting and Emily Phillips Published by Whethan Publishing/These Are Pulse Songs (BMI) c/o Pulse Publishing Administration, Next Wave Music Publishing, Universal – PolyGram Int. Tunes, Inc. on behalf of Universal Music Publishing Ltd., Universal Music Corp. on behalf of itself and PW Arrangements, and Domino Publishing Company USA (ASCAP) Whethan appears courtesy of Atlantic Recording Corp. SOAK appears courtesy of Rough Trade Records Recording courtesy of Ultra Records LLC

FIXES & UPDATES

The Sims 4

Fixed an issue where macOS Simmers could crash when accessing The Gallery.

Fixed an issue where Nice or High Quality harvestables would disappear from Sims’ inventories after Travel or Save/Load.

Fixed an issue where Freelancer Career tasks would not complete after Sims would Travel.

Sims that were seated at a 6 seat round table can now Clean up the dishes.

Child Sims will be now able to enjoy Quick Meals again!

Fixed an issue where Sims didn’t write a genre book when “Write Genre Book” was selected.

Multiple duplicate interactions should no longer appear in pie menus when you have certain objects in your inventory.

The Jet Set Luxury Bath (bathtubJetsGEN_01) was listed as being Unbreakable when that wasn’t true.